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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Lavengro, by George Borrow, Illustrated by E.
+J. Sullivan
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: Lavengro
+       The Scholar, The Gypsy, The Priest
+
+
+Author: George Borrow
+
+
+
+Release Date: May 15, 2006  [eBook #452]
+[Last updated: September 15, 2020]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII)
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LAVENGRO***
+
+
+
+
+
+Transcribed from the 1900 Macmillian and Co. Edition by David Price,
+email ccx074@pglaf.org
+
+
+
+
+
+LAVENGRO
+THE SCHOLAR, THE GYPSY, THE PRIEST
+
+
+BY
+GEORGE BORROW
+
+ILLUSTRATED BY E. J. SULLIVAN
+
+WITH AN INTRODUCTION BY AUGUSTINE
+BIRRELL, Q.C., M.P.
+
+London
+MACMILLAN AND CO., LIMITED
+NEW YORK: THE MACMILLAN COMPANY
+1900
+
+_All rights reserved_
+
+_First published in_ "_Macmillan's Illustrated Standard Novel_," 1896
+_Reprinted_ 1900
+
+{picture:George Borrow: page0.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+The author of _Lavengro_, _the Scholar_, _the Gypsy_, _and the Priest_
+has after his fitful hour come into his own, and there abides securely.
+Borrow's books,--carelessly written, impatient, petulant, in parts
+repellant,--have been found so full of the elixir of life, of the charm
+of existence, of the glory of motion, so instinct with character, and
+mood, and wayward fancy, that their very names are sounds of enchantment,
+whilst the fleeting scenes they depict and the deeds they describe have
+become the properties and the pastimes for all the years that are still
+to be of a considerable fraction of the English-speaking race.
+
+And yet I suppose it would be considered ridiculous in these fine days to
+call Borrow a great artist.  His fascination, his hold upon his reader,
+is not the fascination or the hold of the lords of human smiles and
+tears.  They enthrall us; Borrow only bewitches.  Isopel Berners, hastily
+limned though she be, need fear comparison with no damsel that ever lent
+sweetness to the stage, relish to rhyme, or life to novel.  She can hold
+up her head and take her own part amidst all the Rosalinds, Beatrices,
+and Lucys that genius has created and memory can muster.  But how she
+came into existence puzzles us not a little.  Was she summoned out of
+nothingness by the creative fancy of Lavengro, or did he really first set
+eyes upon her in the dingle whither she came with the Flaming Tinman,
+whose look Lavengro did not like at all?  Reality and romance, though
+Borrow made them wear double harness, are not meant to be driven
+together.  It is hard to weep aright over Isopel Berners.  The reader is
+tortured by a sense of duty towards her.  This distraction prevents our
+giving ourselves away to Borrow.  Perhaps after all he did meet the tall
+girl in the dingle, in which case he was a fool for all his pains, losing
+a gift the gods could not restore.
+
+Quite apart from this particular doubt, the reader of Borrow feels that
+good luck, happy chance, plays a larger part in the charm of the
+composition than is quite befitting were Borrow to be reckoned an artist.
+But nobody surely will quarrel with this ingredient.  It can turn no
+stomach.  Happy are the lucky writers!  Write as they will, they are
+almost certain to please.  There is such a thing as 'sweet
+unreasonableness.'
+
+But no sooner is this said than the necessity for instant and substantial
+qualification becomes urgent, for though Borrow's personal vanity would
+have been wounded had he been ranked with the literary gentlemen who do
+business in words, his anger would have been justly aroused had he been
+told he did not know how to write.  He did know how to write, and he
+acquired the art in the usual way, by taking pains.  He might with
+advantage have taken more pains, and then he would have done better; but
+take pains he did.  In all his books he aims at producing a certain
+impression on the minds of his readers, and in order to produce that
+impression he was content to make sacrifices; hence his whimsicality, his
+out-of-the-wayness, at once his charm and his snare, never grows into
+wantonness and seldom into gross improbability.  He studied effects, as
+his frequent and impressive liturgical repetitions pleasingly
+demonstrate.  He had theories about most things, and may, for all I know,
+have had a theory of cadences.  For words he had no great feeling except
+as a philologist, and is capable of strange abominations.  'Individual'
+pursues one through all his pages, where too are 'equine species,' 'finny
+tribe'; but finding them where we do even these vile phrases, and others
+nearly as bad, have a certain humour.
+
+This chance remark brings me to the real point.  Borrow's charm is that
+he has behind his books a character of his own, which belongs to his
+books as much as to himself; something which bears you up and along as
+does the mystery of the salt sea the swimmer.  And this something lives
+and stirs in almost every page of Borrow, whose restless, puzzling,
+teasing personality pervades and animates the whole.
+
+He is the true adventurer who leads his life, not on the Stock Exchange
+amidst the bulls and bears, or in the House of Commons waiting to clutch
+the golden keys, or in South Africa with the pioneers and promoters, but
+with himself and his own vagrant moods and fancies.  There was no need
+for Borrow to travel far afield in search of adventures.  Mumpers' Dell
+was for him as good an environment as Mexico; a village in Spain or
+Portugal served his turn as well as both the Indies; he was as likely to
+meet adventures in Pall Mall as in the far Soudan.  Strange things happen
+to him wherever he goes; odd figures step from out the hedgerow and
+engage him in wild converse; beggar-women read _Moll Flanders_ on London
+Bridge; Armenian merchants cuff deaf and dumb clerks in London counting-
+houses; prize-fighters, dog-fanciers, Methodist preachers, Romany ryes
+and their rawnees move on and off.  Why should not strange things happen
+to Lavengro?  Why should not strange folk suddenly make their appearance
+before him and as suddenly take their departure?  Is he not strange
+himself?  Did he not puzzle Mr. Petulengro, excite the admiration of Mrs.
+Petulengro, the murderous hate of Mrs. Herne, and drive Isopel Berners
+half distracted?
+
+Nobody has, so far, attempted to write the life of George Borrow.  Nor
+can we wonder.  How could any one dare to follow in the phosphorescent
+track of _Lavengro_ and _The Romany Rye_, or add a line or a hue to the
+portraits there contained of Borrow's father and mother--the gallant
+soldier who had no chance, and whose most famous engagement took place,
+not in Flanders, or in Egypt, or on the banks of the Indus or Oxus, but
+in Hyde Park, his foe being Big Ben Brain; and the dame of the oval face,
+olive complexion, and Grecian forehead, sitting in the dusky parlour in
+the solitary house at the end of the retired court shaded by lofty
+poplars?  I pity 'the individual' whose task it should be to travel along
+the enchanted wake either of Lavengro in England or Don Jorge in Spain.
+Poor would be his part; no better than that of Arthur in 'The Bothie':--
+
+   And it was told, the Piper narrating and Arthur correcting,
+   Colouring he, dilating, magniloquent, glorying in picture,
+   He to a matter-of-fact still softening, paring, abating,
+   He to the great might-have-been upsoaring, sublime and ideal,
+   He to the merest it-was restricting, diminishing, dwarfing,
+   River to streamlet reducing, and fall to slope subduing:
+   So it was told, the Piper narrating, corrected of Arthur.
+
+George Borrow, like many another great man, was born in Norfolk, at East
+Dereham, in 1803, and at an early age began those rambles he has made
+famous, being carried about by his father, Captain Borrow, who was
+chiefly employed as a recruiting officer.  The reader of _Lavengro_ may
+safely be left to make out his own itinerary.  Whilst in Edinburgh Borrow
+attended the High School, and acquired the Scottish accent.  It is not
+too much to say that he has managed to make even Edinburgh more romantic
+simply by abiding there for a season.  From Scotland he went to Ireland,
+and learnt to ride, as well as to talk the Irish tongue, and to seek
+etymologies wherever they were or were not to be found.  But for a famous
+Irish cob, whose hoofs still sound in our ears, Borrow, so he says, might
+have become a mere philologist.  From Ireland he returned with his
+parents to Norwich, and resumed studies, which must have been, from a
+schoolmaster's point of view, grievously interrupted, under the Rev.
+Edward Valpy at King Edward's School.  Here he seems to have been for two
+or three years.  Dr. Jessopp has told us the story of Borrow's dyeing his
+face with walnut juice, and Valpy gravely inquiring of him, 'Borrow, are
+you suffering from jaundice, or is it only dirt?'   The Rajah of Sarawak,
+Sir Archdale Wilson, and the Rev. James Martineau were at school with
+'Lavengro.'  Dr. Jessopp, who in 1859 became headmaster of King Edward's
+School, and who has been a Borrovian from the beginning, found the school
+tradition to be that Borrow, who never reached the sixth form, was
+indolent and even stupid.  In 1819,--the reader will be glad of a
+date,--Borrow left school, and was articled to a solicitor in Norwich,
+and sat for some eight hours every day behind a lofty deal desk copying
+deeds and, it may be presumed, making abstracts of title,--a harmless
+pursuit which a year or two later entirely failed to engage the attention
+of young Mr. Benjamin Disraeli in Montague Place.  Neither of these
+distinguished men can honestly be said ever to have acquired what is
+called the legal mind, a mental equipment which the younger of them had
+once the effrontery to define as a talent for explaining the
+self-evident, illustrating the obvious and expatiating on the
+commonplace.  'By adopting the law,' says Borrow, 'I had not ceased to be
+Lavengro.'  He learnt Welsh when he should have been reading Blackstone.
+He studied German under the direction of the once famous William Taylor
+of Norwich, who in 1821 wrote to Southey: 'A Norwich young man is
+construing with me Schiller's _William Tell_, with a view of translating
+it for the press.  His name is George Henry Borrow, and he has learnt
+German with extraordinary rapidity.  Indeed, he has the gift of tongues,
+and though not yet eighteen, understands twelve languages--English,
+Welsh, Erse, Latin, Greek, Hebrew, German, Danish, French, Italian,
+Spanish, and Portuguese.  He would like to get into the office for
+Foreign Affairs, but does not know how.'
+
+It only takes five years to make an attorney, and Borrow ought therefore,
+had he served out his time, to have become a gentleman by Act of
+Parliament in 1824 or 1825.  He did not do so, though he appears to have
+remained in Norwich until after 1826.  In that year appeared his
+_Romantic Ballads from the Danish_, printed by Simon Wilkins of Norwich
+by subscription.  Dr. Jessopp opines that the _Romantic Ballads_ must
+have brought their translator 'a very respectable sum after paying all
+the expenses of publication.'  I hope it was so, but, as Dr. Johnson once
+said about the immortality of the soul, I should like more evidence of
+it.  When Borrow left Norwich for London, it is hard to say.  It was
+after the death of his father, and was not likely to have been later than
+1828.  His only introduction appears to have been one from William Taylor
+to Sir Richard Phillips, 'the publisher' known to all readers of
+_Lavengro_.  Sir Richard was one of the sheriffs of London and Middlesex,
+and in addition to sundry treatises on the duties of juries, was the
+author of two lucubrations, respectively entitled _The Phaenomena called
+by the name of Gravitation proved to be Proximate Effects of the
+Orbicular and Rotary Motions of the Earth and On the New Theory of the
+System of the Universe_.  In Watt's _Bibliotheca Britannica_, 1824, Sir
+Richard is thus contemptuously referred to: 'This personage is the editor
+of _The Monthly Magazine_, in which many of his effusions may be found
+with the signature of "Common Sense."'  It is not too much to say that
+but for Borrow this nefarious man would be utterly forgotten; as it is,
+he lives for ever in the pages of _Lavengro_, a hissing and a reproach.
+Authors have an ugly trick of getting the better of their publishers in
+the long run.  After leaving London Borrow began the wanderings described
+in _Lavengro_ and _The Romany Rye_.  Those concluded, probably in 1829 or
+1830, he crossed the British Channel, and like another Goldsmith,
+wandered on foot over the Continent of Europe, visiting France, Italy,
+Austria, and Russia.  Of his adventures in these countries there is
+unhappily no record.  In St. Petersburg he must have made a long stay,
+for there he superintended the translation of the Bible into Mandschu-
+Tartar, and published in 1835 his _Targum_; _or Metrical Translations
+from Thirty Languages and Dialects_.  In 1835 Borrow returned to London,
+and being already known to the Bible Society for his biblical labours in
+Russia, was offered, and accepted, the task of circulating the Scriptures
+in the Spanish Peninsula.  As for his labours in this field, which
+occupied him so agreeably for four or five years, are they not narrated
+in _The Bible in Spain_, a book first published by 'Glorious John Murray'
+in three volumes in 1843?  This is the book which made Borrow famous,
+though his earlier work, _The Zincali_; _or an Account of the Gypsies of
+Spain_ (two vols. 1841), had attracted a good deal of notice.  But _The
+Bible in Spain_ took readers by storm, and no wonder!  Sir Robert Peel
+named it in the House of Commons; its perusal imparted a new sensation,
+the sensation of literature, to many a pious subscriber to the Bible
+Society.  The book, wherever it went,--and it went where such like books
+do not often go,--carried joy and rapture with it.  Young people hailed
+it tumultuously and cherished it tenderly.  There were four editions in
+three volumes in the year of publication.  What was thought of the book
+by the Bible Society I do not know.  Perhaps 'he of the countenance of a
+lion,' of whom we read in the forty-fifth chapter of _Lavengro_, scarcely
+knew what to say about it; but the precise-looking man with the
+ill-natured countenance, no doubt, forbade his family to read _The Bible
+in Spain_.
+
+In 1840 Borrow married the widow of a naval officer and settled in
+Norfolk, where his aged mother was still living.  His house was in Oulton
+Broad; and here he became a notable, the hero of many stories, and the
+friend of man, provided he was neither literary nor genteel.  Here also
+he finished _Lavengro_ (1851), and wrote _The Romany Rye_ (1857), _Wild
+Wales_ (1862), and _Romano Lavo-Lil_: _the Word-Book of the Romany_
+(1874).  For a time Borrow had a house in London in Hereford Square,
+where his wife died in 1869.  He died himself at Oulton in August 1881,
+leaving behind him, so it is frequently asserted, many manuscript
+volumes, including treatises on Celtic poetry, on Welsh and Cornish and
+Manx literature, as well as translations from the Norse and Russ and the
+jest-books of Turkey.  Some, at all events, of these works were
+advertised as 'ready for the press' in 1858.
+
+_The Bible in Spain_ was a popular book, and in 1843, the year of its
+publication, its author, a man of striking appearance, was much feted and
+regarded by the lion-hunters of the period.  Borrow did not take kindly
+to the den.  He was full of inbred suspicions and, perhaps, of
+unreasonable demands.  He resented the confinement of the dinner-table,
+the impalement of the ball-room, the imprisonment of the pew.  Like the
+lion in Browning's poem, 'The Glove'--
+
+   You saw by the flash on his forehead,
+   By the hope in those eyes wide and steady,
+   He was leagues in the desert already,
+   Driving the flocks up the mountain.
+
+He began to write _Lavengro_ in London in 1843.  His thoughts went back
+to his old friend Petulengro, who pronounced life to be sweet: 'There's
+night and day, brother, both sweet things; sun, moon, and stars, brother,
+all sweet things.  There's likewise a wind on the heath.  Life is very
+sweet, brother; who would wish to die?'  Yes, or to live cribbed,
+cabined, and confined in a London square!  No wonder 'Lavengro' felt
+cross and uncomfortable.  Nor did he take much pleasure in the society of
+the other lions of the hour, least of all of such a lion as Sir John
+Bowring, M.P.  Was not Bowring 'Lavengro' as much as Borrow himself?  Had
+he not--for there was no end to his impudence--travelled in Spain, and
+actually published a pamphlet in the vernacular?  Was he not meditating
+translations from a score of languages he said he knew?  Was he not,
+furthermore, an old Radical and Republican turned genteel?  Were not his
+wife and daughters more than half suspected of being Jacobites, followers
+of the Reverend Mr. Platitude, and addicted to 'Charley o'er the
+Waterism'?  Borrow did not get on with Bowring.
+
+When Borrow shook the dust of London off his feet, and returned into
+Norfolk with _Lavengro_ barely begun on his hands, he carried away with
+him into his retreat the antipathies and prejudices, the whimsical
+dislikes and the half-real, half-sham disappointments and chagrins which
+London, that fertile mother of megrims, had bred in him, and dropped them
+all into the ink with which he wrote his famous book.  Gentility he
+forswore.  Whatever else Lavengro might turn out, genteel he was not to
+be; and sure enough, when Lavengro made his appearance in 1851 genteel he
+most certainly was not.
+
+There was not the same public to welcome the Gypsy as had hailed the
+Colporteur.  The pious phrases which had garnished so plentifully the
+earlier book had now almost wholly disappeared.  There is no evidence
+that Lavengro ever offered Petulengro a Bible.  Even the denunciations of
+Popery have a dubious sound.  What is sometimes called 'the religious
+world' were no longer buyers of Borrow.  Nor was 'the polite world' much
+better pleased.  The polite reader was both puzzled and annoyed.  First
+of all: Was the book true--autobiography or romance?  A polite reader
+objects to be made a fool of.  One De Foe in a couple of centuries is
+enough for a polite reader.  Then the glorification of ale and of gypsies
+and prize-fighters--would it not be better at once to dub the book
+vulgar, and so have done with it for ever?  An ill-regulated book, a
+strange book, a mad book, a book which condemns the world's way.  If I
+may judge from the reviews, this is how _Lavengro_ struck many, but by no
+means all.  The book had its passionate admirers, its lovers from the
+first.  Men, women, and boys took it to their hearts.  Happy day when
+_Lavengro_ first fell into boyish hands.  It brought adventure and the
+spirit of adventure to your doorstep.  No need painfully to walk to Hull,
+and there take shipping with Robinson Crusoe; no need to sail round the
+world with Captain Cook, or even to shoot lions in Bechuanaland with that
+prince of missionaries, Mr. Robert Moffat; for were there not gypsies on
+the common half a mile from one's homestead, and a dingle at the end of
+the lane?  But the general verdict was, '"Lavengro" has gone too far.'
+
+Borrow was not the man to whistle and let the world go by.  His advice to
+his country men and women was: 'To be courteous to everybody as Lavengro
+was, but always independent like him, and if people meddle with them, to
+give them as good as they bring, even as he and Isopel Berners were in
+the habit of doing; and it will be as well for him to observe that he by
+no means advises women to be too womanly, but, bearing the conduct of
+Isopel Berners in mind, to take their own parts, and if anybody strikes
+them to strike again.'
+
+This is not the spirit which is patient under reproof.  Borrow was not
+going to be sentenced by the gentility party.  He would fulfil his
+dukkeripen.  _Lavengro_ having ended abruptly enough, Borrow took .up the
+tale where he had left it off; and though he kept his admirers on the
+tenter-hooks for six years, did at last in 1857 give to the world _The
+Romany Rye_, to which he added an Appendix.  Ah! that Appendix!  It is
+Borrow's Apologia, and therefore must be read.  It is interesting and
+amusing, and is therefore easily read.  But it is a cruel and outrageous
+bit of writing all the same, proving, were proof needed, that it is every
+whit as easy to be spiteful and envious in dells as in drawing-rooms, and
+as vain and egotistical on a Norfolk Broad as in Grosvenor Square.  In
+this Appendix Borrow defends 'Lavengro,' both the book and the man, at
+some length, and with enormous spirit.  At gentility in all its
+manifestations he runs amuck.  The Stuarts have a chapter to themselves.
+Jacobites, old and new; Papists, old and new; and, alas! Sir Walter Scott
+as the father of 'Charley o'er the Waterism,' all fall by turn under the
+lash of Lavengro.  The attack on the memory of Sir Walter is brutal.  Not
+so, we may be sure, did Pearce, and Cribb, and Spring, and Big Ben Brain,
+and Broughton, heroes of renown, win name and fame in the brave days of
+old.  They never struck a man when he was down, or gloated over a rival's
+fall.  However, it will not do to get angry with George Borrow.  One
+could never keep it up.  Still, the Appendix is a pity.
+
+Next to Borrow's vagabondage, which, though I tremble to say it, has a
+decidedly literary flavour, and his delightful _camaraderie_ or
+willingness to hob-a-nob with everybody, I rank his eloquence.  Great is
+plot, though Borrow has but little, and that little mechanical;
+delightful is incident, and Borrow is full of incident--e.g. the
+poisoning scene in Chapter LXXI., where will you match it, unless it be
+the very differently-treated scene of the robbers' cave in _The Heart of
+Midlothian_? and glorious, too, is motion, and Borrow never stagnates,
+never gathers moss or mould.  But great also is eloquence.  'If a book be
+eloquent,' says Mr. Stevenson, that most distinguished writer, 'its words
+run thenceforward in our ears like the noise of breakers.'  Eloquence is
+a little unfashionable just now.  We are not allowed very much of it in
+our romances and travels.  What are called 'situations' grow stronger
+every day, and language is strong too, but outbursts, apostrophes,
+rhapsodies no longer abound.  Perhaps they are forbidden by Art.  Nobody
+is ever eloquent in real life.  A man's friends would not put up with it.
+But a really eloquent book is a great possession.  Plots explode, and
+incidents, however varied and delightful, unless lit up by the occasional
+lightning-flash of true eloquence, must after a while lose their
+freshness.  Borrow was not afraid to be eloquent, nor were other writers
+of his time.  The first Lord Lytton is now a somewhat disparaged author,
+nor had Borrow any affection for him, considering him to belong to the
+kid-glove school; but Lytton's eloquence, though often playing him shabby
+tricks, now dashing his head against the rocks of bathos, now casting him
+to sprawl unbecomingly amongst the oozy weeds of sentiment, will keep him
+alive for many a long day.  As I write, a passage in _The Caxtons_ comes
+to my mind, and as it illustrates my meaning, I will take down _The
+Caxtons_ and transcribe the passage, and let those laugh who may.  I will
+likewise christen it 'By the Fireside':--
+
+   O young reader, whoever thou art, or reader at least who has been
+   young, canst thou not remember some time when, with thy wild troubles
+   and sorrows as yet borne in secret, thou hast come back from that
+   hard, stern world, which opens on thee when thou puttest thy foot out
+   of the threshold of home, come back to the four quiet walls, wherein
+   thine elders sit in peace, and seen with a sort of sad amaze how calm
+   and undisturbed all is there?  That generation which has gone before
+   thee in the path of passion, the generation of thy parents (not so
+   many years, perchance, remote from thine own), how immovably far off,
+   in its still repose, it seems from thy turbulent youth.  It has in it
+   a stillness as of a classic age, antique as the statues of the Greeks,
+   that tranquil monotony of routine into which those lives that preceded
+   thee have merged, the occupations that they have found sufficing for
+   their happiness by the fireside--in the arm-chair and corner
+   appropriated to each--how strangely they contrast thy own feverish
+   excitement!  And they make room for thee, and bid thee welcome, and
+   then resettle to their hushed pursuits as if nothing had happened!
+   Nothing had happened! while in thy heart, perhaps, the whole world
+   seems to have shot from its axis, all the elements to be at war!  And
+   you sit down, crushed by that quiet happiness which you can share no
+   more, and smile mechanically, and look into the fire; and, ten to one,
+   you say nothing till the time comes for bed, and you take up your
+   candle, and creep miserably to your lonely room.
+
+This is not the eloquence of Borrow, though the thought might have been
+his; it may not be in that grand style of which we hear so much and read
+so little, but--and this is the substance of the matter--it is
+interesting, it is moving, and worth pages of choppy dialogue.  You read
+it, first of all, it may be in your youth, when your heart burnt within
+you as you wondered what was going to happen, but you can return to it in
+sober age and read it over again with a smile it has taken a lifetime to
+manufacture.  And then Miss Bronte's books! what rhetoric is there!  And
+_Eothen_!  Why has not _Eothen_ gone the way of all other traces of
+Eastern travel?  It has humour--delightful humour, no doubt, but it is
+its eloquence, that picture of the burning, beating sun following the
+traveller by day, which keeps _Eothen_ alive.
+
+Borrow's eloquence is splendid, manly, and desperately courageous.  What
+an apostrophe is that to old Crome at the end of the twenty-first
+chapter!  _Lavengro_ is full of riches.  As for his courage, who else
+could begin a passage 'O England,' and emerge triumphantly a page and a
+half lower down as Borrow does in _The Bible in Spain_?
+
+   O England! long, long may it be ere the sun of thy glory sink beneath
+   the wave of darkness!  Though gloomy and portentous clouds are now
+   gathering rapidly round thee, still, still may it please the Almighty
+   to disperse them, and to grant thee a futurity longer in duration and
+   still brighter in renown than thy past!  Or if thy doom be at hand,
+   may that doom be a noble one, and worthy of her who has been styled
+   the Old Queen of the water!  May thou sink, if thou dost sink, amidst
+   blood and flame, with a mighty noise, causing more than one nation to
+   participate in thy downfall!  Of all fates, may it please the Lord to
+   preserve thee from a disgraceful and a slow decay; becoming ere
+   extinct a scorn and a mockery for those self-same foes who now, though
+   they envy and abhor thee, still fear thee, nay, even against their
+   will, honour and respect thee!
+
+   Arouse thee, whilst yet there is time, and prepare thee for the combat
+   of life and death!  Cast from thee the foul scurf which now encrusts
+   thy robust limbs, which deadens their force, and makes them heavy and
+   powerless!  Cast from thee thy false philosophers, who would fain
+   decry what, next to the love of God, has hitherto been deemed most
+   sacred, the love of the mother land!  Cast from thee thy false
+   patriots, who, under the pretext of redressing the wrongs of the poor
+   and weak, seek to promote internal discord, so that thou mayest become
+   only terrible to thyself!  And remove from thee the false prophets who
+   have seen vanity and divined lies; who have daubed thy wall with
+   untempered mortar, that it may fall; who have strengthened the hands
+   of the wicked, and made the hearts of the righteous sad.  O, do this,
+   and fear not the result, for either shall thy end be a majestic and an
+   enviable one, or God shall perpetuate thy reign upon the waters, thou
+   old Queen!
+
+George Borrow,--and this is the last of his virtues with which I shall
+weary you,--had a true English heart.  He could make friends with anybody
+and be at home anywhere, but though he had a mighty thirst he had never,
+in the words of the elder Pitt, 'drunk of the potion described in poetic
+fictions which makes men forget their country.'
+
+I have the permission of the Rev. A. W. Upcher to reprint the following
+letter addressed by him some time ago to the Athenaeum .--
+
+   One summer day during the Crimean War we had a call from George
+   Borrow, who had not enjoyed a visit to Anna Gurney so much as he had
+   expected.  In a walking tour round Norfolk he had given her a short
+   notice of his intended call, and she was ready to receive him.  When,
+   according to his account, he had been but a very short time in her
+   presence, she wheeled her chair round and reached her hand to one of
+   her bookshelves and took down an Arabic grammar, and put it into his
+   hand, asking for explanation of some difficult point, which he tried
+   to decipher; but meanwhile she talked to him continuously; when, said
+   he, 'I could not study the Arabic grammar and listen to her at the
+   same time, so I threw down the book and ran out of the room.'  He
+   seems not to have stopped running till he reached Old Tucker's Inn at
+   Cromer, where he renewed his strength, or calmed his temper, with five
+   excellent sausages, and then came on to Sheringham.  He told us there
+   were three personages in the world whom he always had a desire to see;
+   two of these had slipped through his fingers, so he was determined to
+   see the third.  'Pray, Mr. Borrow, who were they?'  He held up three
+   fingers of his left hand and pointed them off with the forefinger of
+   the right: the first, Daniel O'Connell; the second, Lamplighter (the
+   sire of Phosphorus, Lord Berners's winner of the Derby); the third,
+   Anna Gurney.  The first two were dead and he had not seen them; now he
+   had come to see Anna Gurney, and this was the end of his visit.  I
+   took him up to the Hall, he talking of many persons and occasionally
+   doubling his fist, and giving a sort of warning like that of his
+   Isopel Berners (in _Lavengro_) to give the Flaming Tinman 'Long
+   Melford' with his right hand.  As soon as we reached the Hall a battle-
+   piece by Wouvermans was the first thing that caught his eye and
+   greatly interested him.  He told me of a descendant of Wouvermans--an
+   officer in the Austrian army--whom he knew.  Then entering the drawing-
+   room and looking out of the bay-window through the oak wood on the
+   deep blue sea beyond, he seemed for some time quite entranced by the
+   lovely, peaceful view, till at last I felt I must arouse him, and
+   said, 'A charming view, Mr. Borrow!'  With a deep sigh he slowly
+   answered, 'Yes!--please God the Russians don't come here.'
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE
+
+
+In the following pages I have endeavoured to describe a dream, partly of
+study, partly of adventure, in which will be found copious notices of
+books, and many descriptions of life and manners, some in a very unusual
+form.
+
+The scenes of action lie in the British Islands;--pray be not displeased,
+gentle reader, if perchance thou hast imagined that I was about to
+conduct thee to distant lands, and didst promise thyself much instruction
+and entertainment from what I might tell thee of them.  I do assure thee
+that thou hast no reason to be displeased, inasmuch as there are no
+countries in the world less known by the British than these selfsame
+British Islands, or where more strange things are every day occurring,
+whether in road or street, house or dingle.
+
+The time embraces nearly the first quarter of the present century: this
+information again may, perhaps, be anything but agreeable to thee; it is
+a long time to revert to, but fret not thyself, many matters which at
+present much occupy the public mind originated in some degree towards the
+latter end of that period, and some of them will be treated of.
+
+The principal actors in this dream, or drama, are, as you will have
+gathered from the title-page, a Scholar, a Gypsy, and a Priest.  Should
+you imagine that these three form one, permit me to assure you that you
+are very much mistaken.  Should there be something of the Gypsy manifest
+in the Scholar, there is certainly nothing of the Priest.  With respect
+to the Gypsy--decidedly the most entertaining character of the
+three--there is certainly nothing of the Scholar or the Priest in him;
+and as for the Priest, though there may be something in him both of
+scholarship and gypsyism, neither the Scholar nor the Gypsy would feel at
+all flattered by being confounded with him.
+
+Many characters which may be called subordinate will be found, and it is
+probable that some of these characters will afford much more interest to
+the reader than those styled the principal.  The favourites with the
+writer are a brave old soldier and his helpmate, an ancient gentlewoman
+who sold apples, and a strange kind of wandering man and his wife.
+
+Amongst the many things attempted in this book is the encouragement of
+charity, and free and genial manners, and the exposure of humbug, of
+which there are various kinds, but of which the most perfidious, the most
+debasing, and the most cruel, is the humbug of the Priest.
+
+Yet let no one think that irreligion is advocated in this book.  With
+respect to religious tenets I wish to observe that I am a member of the
+Church of England, into whose communion I was baptized, and to which my
+forefathers belonged.  Its being the religion in which I was baptized,
+and of my forefathers, would be a strong inducement to me to cling to it;
+for I do not happen to be one of those choice spirits 'who turn from
+their banner when the battle bears strongly against it, and go over to
+the enemy,' and who receive at first a hug and a 'viva,' and in the
+sequel contempt and spittle in the face; but my chief reason for
+belonging to it is, because, of all churches calling themselves Christian
+ones, I believe there is none so good, so well founded upon Scripture, or
+whose ministers are, upon the whole, so exemplary in their lives and
+conversation, so well read in the book from which they preach, or so
+versed in general learning, so useful in their immediate neighbourhoods,
+or so unwilling to persecute people of other denominations for matters of
+doctrine.
+
+In the communion of this Church, and with the religious consolation of
+its ministers, I wish and hope to live and die, and in its and their
+defence will at all times be ready, if required, to speak, though humbly,
+and to fight, though feebly, against enemies, whether carnal or
+spiritual.
+
+And is there no priestcraft in the Church of England?  There is
+certainly, or rather there was, a modicum of priestcraft in the Church of
+England, but I have generally found that those who are most vehement
+against the Church of England are chiefly dissatisfied with her because
+there is only a modicum of that article in her--were she stuffed to the
+very cupola with it, like a certain other Church, they would have much
+less to say against the Church of England.
+
+By the other Church, I mean Rome.  Its system was once prevalent in
+England, and, during the period that it prevailed there, was more
+prolific of debasement and crime than all other causes united.  The
+people and the government at last becoming enlightened by means of the
+Scripture spurned it from the island with disgust and horror, the land
+instantly after its disappearance becoming a fair field, in which arts,
+sciences, and all the amiable virtues flourished, instead of being a
+pestilent marsh where swine-like ignorance wallowed, and artful
+hypocrites, like so many Wills-o'-the-wisp, played antic gambols about,
+around, and above debased humanity.
+
+But Popery still wished to play her old part, to regain her lost
+dominion, to reconvert the smiling land into the pestilential morass,
+where she could play again her old antics.  From the period of the
+Reformation in England up to the present time, she has kept her
+emissaries here, individuals contemptible in intellect, it is true, but
+cat-like and gliding, who, at her bidding, have endeavoured, as much as
+in their power has lain, to damp and stifle every genial, honest, loyal,
+and independent thought, and to reduce minds to such a state of dotage as
+would enable their old Popish mother to do what she pleased with them.
+
+And in every country, however enlightened, there are always minds
+inclined to grovelling superstition--minds fond of eating dust and
+swallowing clay--minds never at rest, save when prostrate before some
+fellow in a surplice; and these Popish emissaries found always some weak
+enough to bow down before them, astounded by their dreadful denunciations
+of eternal woe and damnation to any who should refuse to believe their
+Romania; but they played a poor game--the law protected the servants of
+Scripture, and the priest with his beads seldom ventured to approach any
+but the remnant of those of the eikonolatry--representatives of
+worm-eaten houses, their debased dependants, and a few poor crazy
+creatures amongst the middle classes--he played a poor game, and the
+labour was about to prove almost entirely in vain, when the English
+legislature, in compassion or contempt, or, yet more probably, influenced
+by that spirit of toleration and kindness which is so mixed up with
+Protestantism, removed almost entirely the disabilities under which
+Popery laboured, and enabled it to raise its head and to speak out almost
+without fear.
+
+And it did raise its head, and, though it spoke with some little fear at
+first, soon discarded every relic of it; went about the land uttering its
+damnation cry, gathering around it--and for doing so many thanks to
+it--the favourers of priestcraft who lurked within the walls of the
+Church of England; frightening with the loudness of its voice the weak,
+the timid, and the ailing; perpetrating, whenever it had an opportunity,
+that species of crime to which it has ever been most partial--_Deathbed
+robbery_; for as it is cruel, so is it dastardly.  Yes, it went on
+enlisting, plundering, and uttering its terrible threats till--till it
+became, as it always does when left to itself, a fool, a very fool.  Its
+plunderings might have been overlooked, and so might its insolence, had
+it been common insolence, but it--, and then the roar of indignation
+which arose from outraged England against the viper, the frozen viper,
+which it had permitted to warm itself upon its bosom.
+
+But thanks, Popery, you have done all that the friends of enlightenment
+and religious liberty could wish; but if ever there were a set of foolish
+ones to be found under heaven, surely it is the priestly rabble who came
+over from Rome to direct the grand movement--so long in its getting up.
+
+But now again the damnation cry is withdrawn, there is a subdued meekness
+in your demeanour, you are now once more harmless as a lamb.  Well, we
+shall see how the trick--'the old trick'--will serve you.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I
+
+
+Birth--My father--Tamerlane--Ben Brain--French Protestants--East
+Anglia--Sorrow and troubles--True peace--A beautiful child--Foreign
+grave--Mirrors--Alpine country--Emblems--Slow of speech--The Jew--Strange
+gestures.
+
+On an evening of July, in the year 18--, at East D---, a beautiful little
+town in a certain district of East Anglia, I first saw the light.
+
+My father was a Cornish man, the youngest, as I have heard him say, of
+seven brothers.  He sprang from a family of gentlemen, or, as some people
+would call them, gentillatres, for they were not very wealthy; they had a
+coat of arms, however, and lived on their own property at a place called
+Tredinnock, which being interpreted means _the house on the hill_, which
+house and the neighbouring acres had been from time immemorial in their
+possession.  I mention these particulars that the reader may see at once
+that I am not altogether of low and plebeian origin; the present age is
+highly aristocratic, and I am convinced that the public will read my
+pages with more zest from being told that I am a gentillatre by birth
+with Cornish blood {5} in my veins, of a family who lived on their own
+property at a place bearing a Celtic name, signifying the house on the
+hill, or more strictly the house on the _hillock_.
+
+My father was what is generally termed a posthumous child--in other
+words, the gentillatre who begot him never had the satisfaction of
+invoking the blessing of the Father of All upon his head; having departed
+this life some months before the birth of his youngest son.  The boy,
+therefore, never knew a father's care; he was, however, well tended by
+his mother, whose favourite he was; so much so, indeed, that his
+brethren, the youngest of whom was considerably older than himself, were
+rather jealous of him.  I never heard, however, that they treated him
+with any marked unkindness, and it will be as well to observe here that I
+am by no means well acquainted with his early history, of which, indeed,
+as I am not writing his life, it is not necessary to say much.  Shortly
+after his mother's death, which occurred when he was eighteen, he adopted
+the profession of arms, which he followed during the remainder of his
+life, and in which, had circumstances permitted, he would probably have
+shone amongst the best.  By nature he was cool and collected, slow to
+anger, though perfectly fearless, patient of control, of great strength;
+and, to crown all, a proper man with his hands.
+
+With far inferior qualifications many a man has become a field-marshal or
+general; similar ones made Tamerlane, who was not a gentillatre, but the
+son of a blacksmith, emperor of one-third of the world; but the race is
+not always for the swift, nor the battle for the strong, indeed I ought
+rather to say very seldom; certain it is, that my father, with all his
+high military qualifications, never became emperor, field-marshal, or
+even general: indeed, he had never an opportunity of distinguishing
+himself save in one battle, and that took place neither in Flanders,
+Egypt, nor on the banks of the Indus or Oxus, but in Hyde Park.
+
+Smile not, gentle reader, many a battle has been fought in Hyde Park, in
+which as much skill, science, and bravery have been displayed as ever
+achieved a victory in Flanders or by the Indus.  In such a combat as that
+to which I allude, I opine that even Wellington or Napoleon would have
+been heartily glad to cry for quarter ere the lapse of five minutes, and
+even the Blacksmith Tartar would, perhaps, have shrunk from the opponent
+with whom, after having had a dispute with him, my father engaged in
+single combat for one hour, at the end of which time the champions shook
+hands and retired, each having experienced quite enough of the other's
+prowess.  The name of my father's antagonist was Brain.
+
+What! still a smile? did you never hear that name before?  I cannot help
+it!  Honour to Brain, who four months after the event which I have now
+narrated was champion of England, having conquered the heroic Johnson.
+Honour to Brain, who, at the end of other four months, worn out by the
+dreadful blows which he had received in his manly combats, expired in the
+arms of my father, who read the Bible to him in his latter moments--Big
+Ben Brain.
+
+You no longer smile, even _you_ have heard of Big Ben.
+
+I have already hinted that my father never rose to any very exalted rank
+in his profession, notwithstanding his prowess and other qualifications.
+After serving for many years in the line, he at last entered as captain
+in the militia regiment of the Earl of ---, at that period just raised,
+and to which he was sent by the Duke of York to instruct the young levies
+in military manoeuvres and discipline; and in this mission I believe he
+perfectly succeeded, competent judges having assured me that the regiment
+in question soon came by his means to be considered as one of the most
+brilliant in the service, and inferior to no regiment of the line in
+appearance or discipline.
+
+As the headquarters of this corps were at D--- the duties of my father
+not unfrequently carried him to that place, and it was on one of these
+occasions that he became acquainted with a young person of the
+neighbourhood, for whom he formed an attachment, which was returned; and
+this young person was my mother.
+
+She was descended from a family of French Protestants, natives of Caen,
+who were obliged to leave their native country when old Louis, at the
+instigation of the Pope, thought fit to revoke the Edict of Nantes: their
+name was Petrement, and I have reason for believing that they were people
+of some consideration; that they were noble hearts, and good Christians,
+they gave sufficient proof in scorning to bow the knee to the tyranny of
+Rome.  So they left beautiful Normandy for their faith's sake, and with a
+few louis d'ors in their purse, a Bible in the vulgar tongue, and a
+couple of old swords, which, if report be true, had done service in the
+Huguenot wars, they crossed the sea to the isle of civil peace and
+religious liberty, and established themselves in East Anglia.
+
+And many other Huguenot families bent their steps thither, and devoted
+themselves to agriculture or the mechanical arts; and in the venerable
+old city, the capital of the province, in the northern shadow of the
+Castle of De Burgh, the exiles built for themselves a church where they
+praised God in the French tongue, and to which, at particular seasons of
+the year, they were in the habit of flocking from country and from town
+to sing--
+
+'Thou hast provided for us a goodly earth; thou waterest her furrows,
+thou sendest rain into the little valleys thereof, thou makest it soft
+with the drops of rain, and blessest the increase of it.'
+
+I have been told that in her younger days my mother was strikingly
+handsome; this I can easily believe: I never knew her in her youth, for
+though she was very young when she married my father (who was her senior
+by many years), she had attained the middle age before I was born, no
+children having been vouchsafed to my parents in the early stages of
+their union.  Yet even at the present day, now that years threescore and
+ten have passed over her head, attended with sorrow and troubles
+manifold, poorly chequered with scanty joys, can I look on that
+countenance and doubt that at one time beauty decked it as with a
+glorious garment?  Hail to thee, my parent! as thou sittest there, in thy
+widow's weeds, in the dusky parlour in the house overgrown with the
+lustrous ivy of the sister isle, the solitary house at the end of the
+retired court shaded by lofty poplars.  Hail to thee, dame of the oval
+face, olive complexion, and Grecian forehead; by thy table seated with
+the mighty volume of the good Bishop Hopkins spread out before thee;
+there is peace in thy countenance, my mother; it is not worldly peace,
+however, not the deceitful peace which lulls to bewitching slumbers, and
+from which, let us pray, humbly pray, that every sinner may be roused in
+time to implore mercy not in vain!  Thine is the peace of the righteous,
+my mother, of those to whom no sin can be imputed, the score of whose
+misdeeds has been long since washed away by the blood of atonement, which
+imputeth righteousness to those who trust in it.  It was not always thus,
+my mother; a time was, when the cares, pomps, and vanities of this world
+agitated thee too much; but that time is gone by, another and a better
+has succeeded; there is peace now on thy countenance, the true peace;
+peace around thee, too, in thy solitary dwelling, sounds of peace, the
+cheerful hum of the kettle and the purring of the immense angola, which
+stares up at thee from its settle with its almost human eyes.
+
+No more earthly cares and affections now, my mother!  Yes, one.  Why dost
+thou suddenly raise thy dark and still brilliant eye from the volume with
+a somewhat startled glance?  What noise is that in the distant street?
+Merely the noise of a hoof; a sound common enough: it draws nearer,
+nearer, and now it stops before thy gate.  Singular!  And now there is a
+pause, a long pause.  Ha! thou hearest something--a footstep; a swift but
+heavy footstep! thou risest, thou tremblest, there is a hand on the pin
+of the outer door, there is some one in the vestibule, and now the door
+of thy apartment opens, there is a reflection on the mirror behind thee,
+a travelling hat, a gray head and sunburnt face.  My dearest Son!--My
+darling Mother!
+
+Yes, mother, thou didst recognise in the distant street the hoof-tramp of
+the wanderer's horse.
+
+I was not the only child of my parents; I had a brother some three years
+older than myself.  He was a beautiful child; one of those occasionally
+seen in England, and in England alone; a rosy, angelic face, blue eyes,
+and light chestnut hair; it was not exactly an Anglo-Saxon countenance,
+in which, by the bye, there is generally a cast of loutishness and
+stupidity; it partook, to a certain extent, of the Celtic character,
+particularly in the fire and vivacity which illumined it; his face was
+the mirror of his mind; perhaps no disposition more amiable was ever
+found amongst the children of Adam, united, however, with no
+inconsiderable portion of high and dauntless spirit.  So great was his
+beauty in infancy, that people, especially those of the poorer classes,
+would follow the nurse who carried him about in order to look at and
+bless his lovely face.  At the age of three months an attempt was made to
+snatch him from his mother's arms in the streets of London, at the moment
+she was about to enter a coach; indeed, his appearance seemed to operate
+so powerfully upon every person who beheld him, that my parents were
+under continual apprehension of losing him; his beauty, however, was
+perhaps surpassed by the quickness of his parts.  He mastered his letters
+in a few hours, and in a day or two could decipher the names of people on
+the doors of houses and over the shop-windows.
+
+As he grew up, his personal appearance became less prepossessing, his
+quickness and cleverness, however, rather increased; and I may say of
+him, that with respect to everything which he took in hand he did it
+better and more speedily than any other person.  Perhaps it will be asked
+here, what became of him?  Alas! alas! his was an early and a foreign
+grave.  As I have said before, the race is not always for the swift, nor
+the battle for the strong.
+
+And now, doubtless, after the above portrait of my brother, painted in
+the very best style of Rubens, the reader will conceive himself justified
+in expecting a full-length one of myself, as a child, for as to my
+present appearance, I suppose he will be tolerably content with that
+flitting glimpse in the mirror.  But he must excuse me; I have no
+intention of drawing a portrait of myself in childhood; indeed it would
+be difficult, for at that time I never looked into mirrors.  No attempts,
+however, were ever made to steal me in my infancy, and I never heard that
+my parents entertained the slightest apprehension of losing me by the
+hands of kidnappers, though I remember perfectly well that people were in
+the habit of standing still to look at me, ay, more than at my brother;
+from which premisses the reader may form any conclusion with respect to
+my appearance which seemeth good unto him and reasonable.  Should he,
+being a good-natured person, and always inclined to adopt the charitable
+side in any doubtful point, be willing to suppose that I, too, was
+eminently endowed by nature with personal graces, I tell him frankly that
+I have no objection whatever to his entertaining that idea; moreover,
+that I heartily thank him, and shall at all times be disposed, under
+similar circumstances, to exercise the same species of charity towards
+himself.
+
+With respect to my mind and its qualities I shall be more explicit; for,
+were I to maintain much reserve on this point, many things which appear
+in these memoirs would be highly mysterious to the reader, indeed
+incomprehensible.  Perhaps no two individuals were ever more unlike in
+mind and disposition than my brother and myself: as light is opposed to
+darkness, so was that happy, brilliant, cheerful child to the sad and
+melancholy being who sprang from the same stock as himself, and was
+nurtured by the same milk.
+
+Once, when travelling in an Alpine country, I arrived at a considerable
+elevation; I saw in the distance, far below, a beautiful stream hastening
+to the ocean, its rapid waters here sparkling in the sunshine, and there
+tumbling merrily in cascades.  On its banks were vineyards and cheerful
+villages; close to where I stood, in a granite basin with steep and
+precipitous sides, slumbered a deep, dark lagoon, shaded by black pines,
+cypresses, and yews.  It was a wild, savage spot, strange and singular;
+ravens hovered above the pines, filling the air with their uncouth notes,
+pies chattered, and I heard the cry of an eagle from a neighbouring peak;
+there lay the lake, the dark, solitary, and almost inaccessible lake;
+gloomy shadows were upon it, which, strangely modified, as gusts of wind
+agitated the surface, occasionally assumed the shape of monsters.  So I
+stood on the Alpine elevation, and looked now on the gay distant river,
+and now at the dark granite-encircled lake close beside me in the lone
+solitude, and I thought of my brother and myself.  I am no moraliser; but
+the gay and rapid river, and the dark and silent lake, were, of a verity,
+no bad emblems of us two.
+
+So far from being quick and clever like my brother, and able to rival the
+literary feat which I have recorded of him, many years elapsed before I
+was able to understand the nature of letters, or to connect them.  A
+lover of nooks and retired corners, I was as a child in the habit of
+fleeing from society, and of sitting for hours together with my head on
+my breast.  What I was thinking about, it would be difficult to say at
+this distance of time; I remember perfectly well, however, being ever
+conscious of a peculiar heaviness within me, and at times of a strange
+sensation of fear, which occasionally amounted to horror, and for which I
+could assign no real cause whatever.
+
+By nature slow of speech, I took no pleasure in conversation, nor in
+hearing the voices of my fellow-creatures.  When people addressed me, I
+not unfrequently, especially if they were strangers, turned away my head
+from them, and if they persisted in their notice burst into tears, which
+singularity of behaviour by no means tended to dispose people in my
+favour.  I was as much disliked as my brother was deservedly beloved and
+admired.  My parents, it is true, were always kind to me; and my brother,
+who was good nature itself, was continually lavishing upon me every mark
+of affection.
+
+There was, however, one individual who, in the days of my childhood, was
+disposed to form a favourable opinion of me.  One day, a Jew--I have
+quite forgotten the circumstance, but I was long subsequently informed of
+it--one day a travelling Jew knocked at the door of a farmhouse in which
+we had taken apartments; I was near at hand sitting in the bright
+sunshine, drawing strange lines on the dust with my fingers, an ape and
+dog were my companions; the Jew looked at me and asked me some questions,
+to which, though I was quite able to speak, I returned no answer.  On the
+door being opened, the Jew, after a few words, probably relating to
+pedlery, demanded who the child was, sitting in the sun; the maid replied
+that I was her mistress's youngest son, a child weak _here_, pointing to
+her forehead.  The Jew looked at me again, and then said: ''Pon my
+conscience, my dear, I believe that you must be troubled there yourself
+to tell me any such thing.  It is not my habit to speak to children,
+inasmuch as I hate them, because they often follow me and fling stones
+after me; but I no sooner looked at that child than I was forced to speak
+to it--his not answering me shows his sense, for it has never been the
+custom of the wise to fling away their words in indifferent talk and
+conversation; the child is a sweet child, and has all the look of one of
+our people's children.  Fool, indeed! did I not see his eyes sparkle just
+now when the monkey seized the dog by the ear?--they shone like my own
+diamonds--does your good lady want any--real and fine?  Were it not for
+what you tell me, I should say it was a prophet's child.  Fool, indeed!
+he can write already, or I'll forfeit the box which I carry on my back,
+and for which I should be loth to take two hundred pounds!'  He then
+leaned forward to inspect the lines which I had traced.  All of a sudden
+he started back, and grew white as a sheet; then, taking off his hat, he
+made some strange gestures to me, cringing, chattering, and showing his
+teeth, and shortly departed, muttering something about 'holy letters,'
+and talking to himself in a strange tongue.  The words of the Jew were in
+due course of time reported to my mother, who treasured them in her
+heart, and from that moment began to entertain brighter hopes of her
+youngest born than she had ever before ventured to foster.
+
+{picture:All of a sudden he started back, and grew white as a sheet:
+page13.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II
+
+
+Barracks and lodgings--A camp--The viper--A delicate child--Blackberry
+time--_Meun_ and _tuum_--Hythe--The Golgotha--Daneman's skull--Superhuman
+stature--Stirring times--The sea-bord.
+
+I have been a wanderer the greater part of my life; indeed I remember
+only two periods, and these by no means lengthy, when I was, strictly
+speaking, stationary.  I was a soldier's son, and as the means of my
+father were by no means sufficient to support two establishments, his
+family invariably attended him wherever he went, so that from my infancy
+I was accustomed to travelling and wandering, and looked upon a monthly
+change of scene and residence as a matter of course.  Sometimes we lived
+in barracks, sometimes in lodgings, but generally in the former, always
+eschewing the latter from motives of economy, save when the barracks were
+inconvenient and uncomfortable; and they must have been highly so indeed,
+to have discouraged us from entering them; for though we were gentry
+(pray bear that in mind, gentle reader), gentry by birth, and
+incontestably so by my father's bearing the commission of good old George
+the Third, we were not _fine gentry_, but people who could put up with as
+much as any genteel Scotch family who find it convenient to live on a
+third floor in London, or on a sixth at Edinburgh or Glasgow.  It was not
+a little that could discourage us: we once lived within the canvas walls
+of a camp, at a place called Pett, in Sussex; and I believe it was at
+this place that occurred the first circumstance, or adventure, call it
+which you will, that I can remember in connection with myself: it was a
+strange one, and I will relate it.
+
+It happened that my brother and myself were playing one evening in a
+sandy lane, in the neighbourhood of this Pett camp; our mother was at a
+slight distance.  All of a sudden, a bright yellow, and, to my infantine
+eye, beautiful and glorious, object made its appearance at the top of the
+bank from between the thick quickset, and, gliding down, began to move
+across the lane to the other side, like a line of golden light.  Uttering
+a cry of pleasure, I sprang forward, and seized it nearly by the middle.
+A strange sensation of numbing coldness seemed to pervade my whole arm,
+which surprised me the more, as the object to the eye appeared so warm
+and sunlike.  I did not drop it, however, but, holding it up, looked at
+it intently, as its head dangled about a foot from my hand.  It made no
+resistance; I felt not even the slightest struggle; but now my brother
+began to scream and shriek like one possessed.  'O mother, mother!' said
+he, 'the viper!--my brother has a viper in his hand!'  He then, like one
+frantic, made an effort to snatch the creature away from me.  The viper
+now hissed amain, and raised its head, in which were eyes like hot coals,
+menacing, not myself, but my brother.  I dropped my captive, for I saw my
+mother running towards me; and the reptile, after standing for a moment
+nearly erect, and still hissing furiously, made off, and disappeared.  The
+whole scene is now before me, as vividly as if it occurred yesterday--the
+gorgeous viper, my poor dear frantic brother, my agitated parent, and a
+frightened hen clucking under the bushes--and yet I was not three years
+old.
+
+It is my firm belief that certain individuals possess an inherent power,
+or fascination, over certain creatures, otherwise I should be unable to
+account for many feats which I have witnessed, and, indeed, borne a share
+in, connected with the taming of brutes and reptiles.  I have known a
+savage and vicious mare, whose stall it was dangerous to approach, even
+when bearing provender, welcome, nevertheless, with every appearance of
+pleasure, an uncouth, wiry-headed man, with a frightfully seamed face,
+and an iron hook supplying the place of his right hand, one whom the
+animal had never seen before, playfully bite his hair, and cover his face
+with gentle and endearing kisses; and I have already stated how a viper
+would permit, without resentment, one child to take it up in his hand,
+whilst it showed its dislike to the approach of another by the fiercest
+hissings.  Philosophy can explain many strange things, but there are some
+which are a far pitch above her, and this is one.
+
+I should scarcely relate another circumstance which occurred about this
+time but for a singular effect which it produced upon my constitution.  Up
+to this period I had been rather a delicate child; whereas, almost
+immediately after the occurrence to which I allude, I became both hale
+and vigorous, to the great astonishment of my parents, who naturally
+enough expected that it would produce quite a contrary effect.
+
+It happened that my brother and myself were disporting ourselves in
+certain fields near the good town of Canterbury.  A female servant had
+attended us, in order to take care that we came to no mischief: she,
+however, it seems, had matters of her own to attend to, and, allowing us
+to go where we listed, remained in one corner of a field, in earnest
+conversation with a red-coated dragoon.  Now it chanced to be blackberry
+time, and the two children wandered under the hedges, peering anxiously
+among them in quest of that trash so grateful to urchins of their degree.
+We did not find much of it, however, and were soon separated in the
+pursuit.  All at once I stood still, and could scarcely believe my eyes.
+I had come to a spot where, almost covering the hedge, hung clusters of
+what seemed fruit--deliciously-tempting fruit--something resembling
+grapes of various colours, green, red, and purple.  Dear me, thought I,
+how fortunate! yet have I a right to gather it? is it mine? for the
+observance of the law of _meum_ and _tuum_ had early been impressed upon
+my mind, and I entertained, even at that tender age, the utmost horror
+for theft; so I stood staring at the variegated clusters, in doubt as to
+what I should do.  I know not how I argued the matter in my mind; the
+temptation, however, was at last too strong for me, so I stretched forth
+my hand and ate.  I remember, perfectly well, that the taste of this
+strange fruit was by no means so pleasant as the appearance; but the idea
+of eating fruit was sufficient for a child, and, after all, the flavour
+was much superior to that of sour apples, so I ate voraciously.  How long
+I continued eating I scarcely know.  One thing is certain, that I never
+left the field as I entered it, being carried home in the arms of the
+dragoon in strong convulsions, in which I continued for several hours.
+About midnight I awoke, as if from a troubled sleep, and beheld my
+parents bending over my couch, whilst the regimental surgeon, with a
+candle in his hand, stood nigh, the light feebly reflected on the
+whitewashed walls of the barrack-room.
+
+Another circumstance connected with my infancy, and I have done.  I need
+offer no apology for relating it, as it subsequently exercised
+considerable influence over my pursuits.  We were, if I remember right,
+in the vicinity of a place called Hythe, in Kent.  One sweet evening, in
+the latter part of summer, our mother took her two little boys by the
+hand, for a wander about the fields.  In the course of our stroll we came
+to the village church; an old, gray-headed sexton stood in the porch,
+who, perceiving that we were strangers, invited us to enter.  We were
+presently in the interior, wandering about the aisles, looking on the
+walls, and inspecting the monuments of the notable dead.  I can scarcely
+state what we saw; how should I?  I was a child not yet four years old,
+and yet I think I remember the evening sun streaming in through a stained
+window upon the dingy mahogany pulpit, and flinging a rich lustre upon
+the faded tints of an ancient banner.  And now once more we were outside
+the building, where, against the wall, stood a low-eaved pent-house, into
+which we looked.  It was half filled with substances of some kind, which
+at first looked like large gray stones.  The greater part were lying in
+layers; some, however, were seen in confused and mouldering heaps, and
+two or three, which had perhaps rolled down from the rest, lay separately
+on the floor.  'Skulls, madam,' said the sexton; 'skulls of the old
+Danes!  Long ago they came pirating into these parts; and then there
+chanced a mighty shipwreck, for God was angry with them, and He sunk
+them; and their skulls, as they came ashore, were placed here as a
+memorial.  There were many more when I was young, but now they are fast
+disappearing.  Some of them must have belonged to strange fellows, madam.
+Only see that one; why, the two young gentry can scarcely lift it!'  And,
+indeed, my brother and myself had entered the Golgotha, and commenced
+handling these grim relics of mortality.  One enormous skull, lying in a
+corner, had fixed our attention, and we had drawn it forth.  Spirit of
+eld, what a skull was yon!
+
+{picture:'Skulls, madam,' said the sexton; 'skulls of the old Danes.':
+page18.jpg}
+
+I still seem to see it, the huge grim thing; many of the others were
+large, strikingly so, and appeared fully to justify the old man's
+conclusion that their owners must have been strange fellows; but,
+compared with this mighty mass of bone, they looked small and diminutive
+like those of pigmies; it must have belonged to a giant, one of those red-
+haired warriors of whose strength and stature such wondrous tales are
+told in the ancient chronicles of the north, and whose grave-hills, when
+ransacked, occasionally reveal secrets which fill the minds of puny
+moderns with astonishment and awe.  Reader, have you ever pored days and
+nights over the pages of Snorro?--probably not, for he wrote in a
+language which few of the present day understand, and few would be
+tempted to read him tamed down by Latin dragomans.  A brave old book is
+that of Snorro, containing the histories and adventures of old northern
+kings and champions, who seemed to have been quite different men, if we
+may judge from the feats which they performed, from those of these days;
+one of the best of his histories is that which describes the life of
+Harald Haardraade, who, after manifold adventures by land and sea, now a
+pirate, now a mercenary of the Greek emperor, became king of Norway, and
+eventually perished at the battle of Stamford Bridge, whilst engaged in a
+gallant onslaught upon England.  Now, I have often thought that the old
+Kemp, whose mouldering skull in the Golgotha of Hythe my brother and
+myself could scarcely lift, must have resembled in one respect at least
+this Harald, whom Snorro describes as a great and wise ruler and a
+determined leader, dangerous in battle, of fair presence and measuring in
+height just _five ells_, {19} neither more nor less.
+
+I never forgot the Daneman's skull; like the apparition of the viper in
+the sandy lane, it dwelt in the mind of the boy, affording copious food
+for the exercise of imagination.  From that moment with the name of Dane
+were associated strange ideas of strength, daring, and superhuman
+stature; and an undefinable curiosity for all that is connected with the
+Danish race began to pervade me; and if, long after, when I became a
+student I devoted myself with peculiar zest to Danish lore and the
+acquirement of the old Norse tongue and its dialects, I can only explain
+the matter by the early impression received at Hythe from the tale of the
+old sexton, beneath the pent-house, and the sight of the Danish skull.
+
+And thus we went on straying from place to place, at Hythe to-day, and
+perhaps within a week looking out from our hostel-window upon the streets
+of old Winchester, our motions ever in accordance with the 'route' of the
+regiment, so habituated to change of scene that it had become almost
+necessary to our existence.  Pleasant were these days of my early
+boyhood; and a melancholy pleasure steals over me as I recall them.  Those
+were stirring times of which I am speaking, and there was much passing
+around me calculated to captivate the imagination.  The dreadful struggle
+which so long convulsed Europe, and in which England bore so prominent a
+part, was then at its hottest; we were at war, and determination and
+enthusiasm shone in every face; man, woman, and child were eager to fight
+the Frank, the hereditary, but, thank God, never dreaded enemy of the
+Anglo-Saxon race.  'Love your country and beat the French, and then never
+mind what happens,' was the cry of entire England.  Oh, those were days
+of power, gallant days, bustling days, worth the bravest days of chivalry
+at least; tall battalions of native warriors were marching through the
+land; there was the glitter of the bayonet and the gleam of the sabre;
+the shrill squeak of the fife and loud rattling of the drum were heard in
+the streets of country towns, and the loyal shouts of the inhabitants
+greeted the soldiery on their arrival, or cheered them at their
+departure.  And now let us leave the upland, and descend to the sea-bord;
+there is a sight for you upon the billows!  A dozen men-of-war are
+gliding majestically out of port, their long buntings streaming from the
+top-gallant masts, calling on the skulking Frenchman to come forth from
+his bights and bays; and what looms upon us yonder from the fog-bank in
+the east? a gallant frigate towing behind her the long low hull of a
+crippled privateer, which but three short days ago had left Dieppe to
+skim the sea, and whose crew of ferocious hearts are now cursing their
+imprudence in an English hold.  Stirring times those, which I love to
+recall, for they were days of gallantry and enthusiasm, and were moreover
+the days of my boyhood.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+
+
+Pretty D-----The venerable church--The stricken heart--Dormant
+energies--The small packet--Nerves--The books--A picture--Mountain-like
+billows--The footprint--Spirit of De Foe--Reasoning powers--Terrors of
+God--Heads of the dragons--High-Church clerk--A journey--The drowned
+country.
+
+And when I was between six and seven years of age we were once more at
+D---, the place of my birth, whither my father had been despatched on the
+recruiting service.  I have already said that it was a beautiful little
+town--at least it was at the time of which I am speaking--what it is at
+present I know not, for thirty years and more have elapsed since I last
+trod its streets.  It will scarcely have improved, for how could it be
+better than it then was?  I love to think on thee, pretty quiet D---,
+thou pattern of an English country town, with thy clean but narrow
+streets branching out from thy modest market-place, with thine
+old-fashioned houses, with here and there a roof of venerable thatch,
+with thy one half-aristocratic mansion, where resided thy Lady
+Bountiful--she, the generous and kind, who loved to visit the sick,
+leaning on her gold-headed cane, whilst the sleek old footman walked at a
+respectful distance behind.  Pretty quiet D---, with thy venerable
+church, in which moulder the mortal remains of England's sweetest and
+most pious bard.
+
+Yes, pretty D---, I could always love thee, were it but for the sake of
+him who sleeps beneath the marble slab in yonder quiet chancel.  It was
+within thee that the long-oppressed bosom heaved its last sigh, and the
+crushed and gentle spirit escaped from a world in which it had known
+nought but sorrow.  Sorrow! do I say?  How faint a word to express the
+misery of that bruised reed; misery so dark that a blind worm like myself
+is occasionally tempted to exclaim, Better had the world never been
+created than that one so kind, so harmless, and so mild, should have
+undergone such intolerable woe!  But it is over now, for, as there is an
+end of joy, so has affliction its termination.  Doubtless the All-wise
+did not afflict him without a cause: who knows but within that unhappy
+frame lurked vicious seeds which the sunbeams of joy and prosperity might
+have called into life and vigour?  Perhaps the withering blasts of misery
+nipped that which otherwise might have terminated in fruit noxious and
+lamentable.  But peace to the unhappy one, he is gone to his rest; the
+death-like face is no longer occasionally seen timidly and mournfully
+looking for a moment through the window-pane upon thy market-place, quiet
+and pretty D-; the hind in thy neighbourhood no longer at evening-fall
+views, and starts as he views, the dark lathy figure moving beneath the
+hazels and alders of shadowy lanes, or by the side of murmuring trout
+streams, and no longer at early dawn does the sexton of the old church
+reverently doff his hat, as, supported by some kind friend, the death-
+stricken creature totters along the church-path to that mouldering
+edifice with the low roof, inclosing a spring of sanatory waters, built
+and devoted to some saint, if the legend over the door be true, by the
+daughter of an East Anglian king.
+
+But to return to my own history.  I had now attained the age of six:
+shall I state what intellectual progress I had been making up to this
+period?  Alas! upon this point I have little to say calculated to afford
+either pleasure or edification; I had increased rapidly in size and in
+strength: the growth of the mind, however, had by no means corresponded
+with that of the body.  It is true, I had acquired my letters, and was by
+this time able to read imperfectly; but this was all: and even this poor
+triumph over absolute ignorance would never have been effected but for
+the unremitting attention of my parents, who, sometimes by threats,
+sometimes by entreaties, endeavoured to rouse the dormant energies of my
+nature, and to bend my wishes to the acquisition of the rudiments of
+knowledge; but in influencing the wish lay the difficulty.  Let but the
+will of a human being be turned to any particular object, and it is ten
+to one that sooner or later he achieves it.  At this time I may safely
+say that I harboured neither wishes nor hopes; I had as yet seen no
+object calculated to call them forth, and yet I took pleasure in many
+things which perhaps unfortunately were all within my sphere of
+enjoyment.  I loved to look upon the heavens, and to bask in the rays of
+the sun, or to sit beneath hedgerows and listen to the chirping of the
+birds, indulging the while in musing and meditation as far as my very
+limited circle of ideas would permit; but, unlike my brother, who was at
+this time at school, and whose rapid progress in every branch of
+instruction astonished and delighted his preceptors, I took no pleasure
+in books, whose use, indeed, I could scarcely comprehend, and bade fair
+to be as arrant a dunce as ever brought the blush of shame into the
+cheeks of anxious and affectionate parents.
+
+But the time was now at hand when the ice which had hitherto bound the
+mind of the child with its benumbing power was to be thawed, and a world
+of sensations and ideas awakened to which it had hitherto been an entire
+stranger.  One day a young lady, an intimate acquaintance of our family,
+and godmother to my brother, drove up to the house in which we dwelt; she
+stayed some time conversing with my mother, and on rising to depart, she
+put down on the table a small packet, exclaiming, 'I have brought a
+little present for each of the boys: the one is a History of England,
+which I intend for my godson when he returns from school, the other is .
+. .'--and here she said something which escaped my ear, as I sat at some
+distance, moping in a corner,--'I intend it for the youngster yonder,'
+pointing to myself; she then departed, and, my mother going out shortly
+after, I was left alone.
+
+I remember for some time sitting motionless in my corner, with my eyes
+bent upon the ground; at last I lifted my head and looked upon the packet
+as it lay on the table.  All at once a strange sensation came over me,
+such as I had never experienced before--a singular blending of curiosity,
+awe, and pleasure, the remembrance of which, even at this distance of
+time, produces a remarkable effect upon my nervous system.  What strange
+things are the nerves--I mean those more secret and mysterious ones in
+which I have some notion that the mind or soul, call it which you will,
+has its habitation; how they occasionally tingle and vibrate before any
+coming event closely connected with the future weal or woe of the human
+being.  Such a feeling was now within me, certainly independent of what
+the eye had seen or the ear had heard.  A book of some description had
+been brought for me, a present by no means calculated to interest me;
+what cared I for books?  I had already many into which I never looked but
+from compulsion; friends, moreover, had presented me with similar things
+before, which I had entirely disregarded, and what was there in this
+particular book, whose very title I did not know, calculated to attract
+me more than the rest? yet something within told me that my fate was
+connected with the book which had been last brought; so, after looking on
+the packet from my corner for a considerable time, I got up and went to
+the table.
+
+The packet was lying where it had been left--I took it up; had the
+envelope, which consisted of whitish brown paper, been secured by a
+string or a seal, I should not have opened it, as I should have
+considered such an act almost in the light of a crime; the books,
+however, had been merely folded up, and I therefore considered that there
+could be no possible harm in inspecting them, more especially as I had
+received no injunction to the contrary.  Perhaps there was something
+unsound in this reasoning, something sophistical; but a child is
+sometimes as ready as a grown-up person in finding excuses for doing that
+which he is inclined to.  But whether the action was right or wrong, and
+I am afraid it was not altogether right, I undid the packet: it contained
+three books; two from their similarity seemed to be separate parts of one
+and the same work; they were handsomely bound, and to them I first turned
+my attention.  I opened them successively, and endeavoured to make out
+their meaning; their contents, however, as far as I was able to
+understand them, were by no means interesting: whoever pleases may read
+these books for me, and keep them, too, into the bargain, said I to
+myself.
+
+I now took up the third book: it did not resemble the others, being
+longer and considerably thicker; the binding was of dingy calf-skin.  I
+opened it, and as I did so another strange thrill of pleasure shot
+through my frame.  The first object on which my eyes rested was a
+picture; it was exceedingly well executed, at least the scene which it
+represented made a vivid impression upon me, which would hardly have been
+the case had the artist not been faithful to nature.  A wild scene it
+was--a heavy sea and rocky shore, with mountains in the background, above
+which the moon was peering.  Not far from the shore, upon the water, was
+a boat with two figures in it, one of which stood at the bow, pointing
+with what I knew to be a gun at a dreadful shape in the water; fire was
+flashing from the muzzle of the gun, and the monster appeared to be
+transfixed.  I almost thought I heard its cry.  I remained motionless,
+gazing upon the picture, scarcely daring to draw my breath, lest the new
+and wondrous world should vanish of which I had now obtained a glimpse.
+'Who are those people, and what could have brought them into that strange
+situation?' I asked of myself; and now the seed of curiosity, which had
+so long lain dormant, began to expand, and I vowed to myself to become
+speedily acquainted with the whole history of the people in the boat.
+After looking on the picture till every mark and line in it were familiar
+to me, I turned over various leaves till I came to another engraving; a
+new source of wonder--a low sandy beach on which the furious sea was
+breaking in mountain-like billows; cloud and rack deformed the firmament,
+which wore a dull and leaden-like hue; gulls and other aquatic fowls were
+toppling upon the blast, or skimming over the tops of the maddening
+waves--'Mercy upon him! he must be drowned!'  I exclaimed, as my eyes
+fell upon a poor wretch who appeared to be striving to reach the shore;
+he was upon his legs, but was evidently half smothered with the brine;
+high above his head curled a horrible billow, as if to engulf him for
+ever.  'He must be drowned! he must be drowned!'  I almost shrieked, and
+dropped the book.  I soon snatched it up again, and now my eye lighted on
+a third picture: again a shore, but what a sweet and lovely one, and how
+I wished to be treading it; there were beautiful shells lying on the
+smooth white sand, some were empty like those I had occasionally seen on
+marble mantelpieces, but out of others peered the heads and bodies of
+wondrous crayfish, a wood of thick green trees skirted the beach and
+partly shaded it from the rays of the sun, which shone hot above, while
+blue waves slightly crested with foam were gently curling against it;
+there was a human figure upon the beach, wild and uncouth, clad in the
+skins of animals, with a huge cap on his head, a hatchet at his girdle,
+and in his hand a gun; his feet and legs were bare; he stood in an
+attitude of horror and surprise; his body was bent far back, and his
+eyes, which seemed starting out of his head, were fixed upon a mark on
+the sand--a large distinct mark--a human footprint. . . .
+
+Reader, is it necessary to name the book which now stood open in my hand,
+and whose very prints, feeble expounders of its wondrous lines, had
+produced within me emotions strange and novel?  Scarcely--for it was a
+book which has exerted over the minds of Englishmen an influence
+certainly greater than any other of modern times--which has been in most
+people's hands, and with the contents of which even those who cannot read
+are to a certain extent acquainted--a book from which the most luxuriant
+and fertile of our modern prose writers have drunk inspiration--a book,
+moreover, to which, from the hardy deeds which it narrates, and the
+spirit of strange and romantic enterprise which it tends to awaken,
+England owes many of her astonishing discoveries both by sea and land,
+and no inconsiderable part of her naval glory.
+
+Hail to thee, spirit of De Foe!  What does not my own poor self owe to
+thee?  England has better bards than either Greece or Rome, yet I could
+spare them easier far than De Foe, 'unabashed De Foe,' as the hunchbacked
+rhymer styled him.
+
+The true chord had now been touched; a raging curiosity with respect to
+the contents of the volume, whose engravings had fascinated my eye,
+burned within me, and I never rested until I had fully satisfied it;
+weeks succeeded weeks, months followed months, and the wondrous volume
+was my only study and principal source of amusement.  For hours together
+I would sit poring over a page till I had become acquainted with the
+import of every line.  My progress, slow enough at first, became by
+degrees more rapid, till at last, under 'a shoulder of mutton sail,' I
+found myself cantering before a steady breeze over an ocean of
+enchantment, so well pleased with my voyage that I cared not how long it
+might be ere it reached its termination.
+
+And it was in this manner that I first took to the paths of knowledge.
+
+About this time I began to be somewhat impressed with religious feelings.
+My parents were, to a certain extent, religious people; but, though they
+had done their best to afford me instruction on religious points, I had
+either paid no attention to what they endeavoured to communicate, or had
+listened with an ear far too obtuse to derive any benefit.  But my mind
+had now become awakened from the drowsy torpor in which it had lain so
+long, and the reasoning powers which I possessed were no longer inactive.
+Hitherto I had entertained no conception whatever of the nature and
+properties of God, and with the most perfect indifference had heard the
+divine name proceeding from the mouths of people--frequently, alas! on
+occasions when it ought not to be employed; but I now never heard it
+without a tremor, for I now knew that God was an awful and inscrutable
+Being, the Maker of all things; that we were His children, and that we,
+by our sins, had justly offended Him; that we were in very great peril
+from His anger, not so much in this life as in another and far stranger
+state of being yet to come; that we had a Saviour withal to whom it was
+necessary to look for help: upon this point, however, I was yet very much
+in the dark, as, indeed, were most of those with whom I was connected.
+The power and terrors of God were uppermost in my thoughts; they
+fascinated though they astounded me.  Twice every Sunday I was regularly
+taken to the church, where, from a corner of the large spacious pew,
+lined with black leather, I would fix my eyes on the dignified
+High-Church rector, and the dignified High-Church clerk, and watch the
+movement of their lips, from which, as they read their respective
+portions of the venerable liturgy, would roll many a portentous word
+descriptive of the wondrous works of the Most High.
+
+_Rector_.  Thou didst divide the sea, through thy power: thou brakest the
+heads of the dragons in the waters.
+
+_Philoh_.  Thou smotest the heads of Leviathan in pieces: and gavest him
+to be meat for the people in the wilderness.
+
+_Rector_.  Thou broughtest out fountains, and waters out of the hard
+rocks: thou driedst up mighty waters.
+
+_Philoh_.  The day is thine, and the night is thine: thou hast prepared
+the light and the sun.
+
+Peace to your memories, dignified rector, and yet more dignified
+clerk!--by this time ye are probably gone to your long homes, and your
+voices are no longer heard sounding down the aisles of the venerable
+church--nay, doubtless, this has already long since been the fate of him
+of the sonorous 'Amen!'--the one of the two who, with all due respect to
+the rector, principally engrossed my boyish admiration--he, at least, is
+scarcely now among the living! Living! why, I have heard say that he blew
+a fife--for he was a musical as well as a Christian professor--a bold
+fife, to cheer the Guards and the brave Marines, as they marched with
+measured step, obeying an insane command, up Bunker's height, whilst the
+rifles of the sturdy Yankees were sending the leaden hail sharp and thick
+amidst the red-coated ranks; for Philoh had not always been a man of
+peace, nor an exhorter to turn the other cheek to the smiter, but had
+even arrived at the dignity of a halberd in his country's service before
+his six-foot form required rest, and the gray-haired veteran retired,
+after a long peregrination, to his native town, to enjoy ease and
+respectability on a pension of 'eighteenpence a day'; and well did his
+fellow-townsmen act, when, to increase that ease and respectability, and
+with a thoughtful regard for the dignity of the good church service, they
+made him clerk and precentor--the man of the tall form and of the audible
+voice, which sounded loud and clear as his own Bunker fife.  Well, peace
+to thee, thou fine old chap, despiser of dissenters, and hater of
+papists, as became a dignified and High-Church clerk; if thou art in thy
+grave, the better for thee; thou wert fitted to adorn a bygone time, when
+loyalty was in vogue, and smiling content lay like a sunbeam upon the
+land, but thou wouldst be sadly out of place in these days of cold
+philosophic latitudinarian doctrine, universal tolerism, and
+half-concealed rebellion--rare times, no doubt, for papists and
+dissenters, but which would assuredly have broken the heart of the loyal
+soldier of George the Third, and the dignified High-Church clerk of
+pretty D---.
+
+We passed many months at this place: nothing, however, occurred requiring
+any particular notice, relating to myself, beyond what I have already
+stated, and I am not writing the history of others.  At length my father
+was recalled to his regiment, which at that time was stationed at a place
+called Norman Cross, in Lincolnshire, or rather Huntingdonshire, at some
+distance from the old town of Peterborough.  For this place he departed,
+leaving my mother and myself to follow in a few days.  Our journey was a
+singular one.  On the second day we reached a marshy and fenny country,
+which, owing to immense quantities of rain which had lately fallen, was
+completely submerged.  At a large town we got on board a kind of passage-
+boat, crowded with people; it had neither sails nor oars, and those were
+not the days of steam-vessels; it was a treck-schuyt, and was drawn by
+horses.  Young as I was, there was much connected with this journey which
+highly surprised me, and which brought to my remembrance particular
+scenes described in the book which I now generally carried in my bosom.
+The country was, as I have already said, submerged--entirely drowned--no
+land was visible; the trees were growing bolt upright in the flood,
+whilst farmhouses and cottages were standing insulated; the horses which
+drew us were up to the knees in water, and, on coming to blind pools and
+'greedy depths,' were not unfrequently swimming, in which case, the boys
+or urchins who mounted them sometimes stood, sometimes knelt, upon the
+saddle and pillions.  No accident, however, occurred either to the
+quadrupeds or bipeds, who appeared respectively to be quite _au fait_ in
+their business, and extricated themselves with the greatest ease from
+places in which Pharaoh and all his host would have gone to the bottom.
+Nightfall brought us to Peterborough, and from thence we were not slow in
+reaching the place of our destination.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV
+
+
+Norman Cross--Wide expanse--_Vive l'Empereur_--Unpruned woods--Man with
+the bag--Froth and conceit--I beg your pardon--Growing timid--About three
+o'clock--Taking one's ease--Cheek on the ground--King of the
+vipers--French king--Frenchmen and water.
+
+And a strange place it was, this Norman Cross, and, at the time of which
+I am speaking, a sad cross to many a Norman, being what was then styled a
+French prison, that is, a receptacle for captives made in the French war.
+It consisted, if I remember right, of some five or six casernes, very
+long, and immensely high; each standing isolated from the rest, upon a
+spot of ground which might average ten acres, and which was fenced round
+with lofty palisades, the whole being compassed about by a towering wall,
+beneath which, at intervals, on both sides, sentinels were stationed,
+whilst outside, upon the field, stood commodious wooden barracks, capable
+of containing two regiments of infantry, intended to serve as guards upon
+the captives.  Such was the station or prison at Norman Cross, where some
+six thousand French and other foreigners, followers of the grand
+Corsican, were now immured.
+
+What a strange appearance had those mighty casernes, with their blank
+blind walls, without windows or grating, and their slanting roofs, out of
+which, through orifices where the tiles had been removed, would be
+protruded dozens of grim heads, feasting their prison-sick eyes on the
+wide expanse of country unfolded from that airy height.  Ah! there was
+much misery in those casernes; and from those roofs, doubtless, many a
+wistful look was turned in the direction of lovely France.  Much had the
+poor inmates to endure, and much to complain of, to the disgrace of
+England be it said--of England, in general so kind and bountiful.  Rations
+of carrion meat, and bread from which I have seen the very hounds
+occasionally turn away, were unworthy entertainment even for the most
+ruffian enemy, when helpless and a captive; and such, alas! was the fare
+in those casernes.  And then, those visits, or rather ruthless inroads,
+called in the slang of the place 'strawplait-hunts,' when in pursuit of a
+contraband article, which the prisoners, in order to procure themselves a
+few of the necessaries and comforts of existence, were in the habit of
+making, red-coated battalions were marched into the prisons, who, with
+the bayonet's point, carried havoc and ruin into every poor convenience
+which ingenious wretchedness had been endeavouring to raise around it;
+and then the triumphant exit with the miserable booty; and, worst of all,
+the accursed bonfire, on the barrack parade, of the plait contraband,
+beneath the view of the glaring eyeballs from those lofty roofs, amidst
+the hurrahs of the troops, frequently drowned in the curses poured down
+from above like a tempest-shower or in the terrific warw-hoop of '_Vive
+l'Empereur_!'
+
+It was midsummer when we arrived at this place, and the weather, which
+had for a long time been wet and gloomy, now became bright and glorious;
+I was subjected to but little control, and passed my time pleasantly
+enough, principally in wandering about the neighbouring country.  It was
+flat and somewhat fenny, a district more of pasture than agriculture, and
+not very thickly inhabited.  I soon became well acquainted with it.  At
+the distance of two miles from the station was a large lake, styled in
+the dialect of the country 'a mere,' about whose borders tall reeds were
+growing in abundance, this was a frequent haunt of mine; but my favourite
+place of resort was a wild sequestered spot at a somewhat greater
+distance.  Here, surrounded with woods and thick groves, was the seat of
+some ancient family, deserted by the proprietor, and only inhabited by a
+rustic servant or two.  A place more solitary and wild could scarcely be
+imagined; the garden and walks were overgrown with weeds and briers, and
+the unpruned woods were so tangled as to be almost impervious.  About
+this domain I would wander till overtaken by fatigue, and then I would
+sit down with my back against some beech, elm, or stately alder tree,
+and, taking out my book, would pass hours in a state of unmixed
+enjoyment, my eyes now fixed on the wondrous pages, now glancing at the
+sylvan scene around; and sometimes I would drop the book and listen to
+the voice of the rooks and wild pigeons, and not unfrequently to the
+croaking of multitudes of frogs from the neighbouring swamps and fens.
+
+{picture:I frequently passed a tall elderly individual, dressed in rather
+a quaint fashion: page31.jpg}
+
+In going to and from this place I frequently passed a tall elderly
+individual, dressed in rather a quaint fashion, with a skin cap on his
+head and stout gaiters on his legs; on his shoulders hung a moderate
+sized leathern sack; he seemed fond of loitering near sunny banks, and of
+groping amidst furze and low scrubby bramble bushes, of which there were
+plenty in the neighbourhood of Norman Cross.  Once I saw him standing in
+the middle of a dusty road, looking intently at a large mark which seemed
+to have been drawn across it, as if by a walking stick.  'He must have
+been a large one,' the old man muttered half to himself, 'or he would not
+have left such a trail, I wonder if he is near; he seems to have moved
+this way.'  He then went behind some bushes which grew on the right side
+of the road, and appeared to be in quest of something, moving behind the
+bushes with his head downwards, and occasionally striking their roots
+with his foot: at length he exclaimed, 'Here he is!' and forthwith I saw
+him dart amongst the bushes.  There was a kind of scuffling noise, the
+rustling of branches, and the crackling of dry sticks.  'I have him!'
+said the man at last; 'I have got him!' and presently he made his
+appearance about twenty yards down the road, holding a large viper in his
+hand.  'What do you think of that, my boy?' said he, as I went up to
+him--'what do you think of catching such a thing as that with the naked
+hand?'  'What do I think?' said I.  'Why, that I could do as much
+myself.'  'You do,' said the man, 'do you?  Lord! how the young people in
+these days are given to conceit; it did not use to be so in my time: when
+I was a child, childer knew how to behave themselves; but the childer of
+these days are full of conceit, full of froth, like the mouth of this
+viper'; and with his forefinger and thumb he squeezed a considerable
+quantity of foam from the jaws of the viper down upon the road.  'The
+childer of these days are a generation of--God forgive me, what was I
+about to say?' said the old man; and opening his bag he thrust the
+reptile into it, which appeared far from empty.  I passed on.  As I was
+returning, towards the evening, I overtook the old man, who was wending
+in the same direction.  'Good evening to you, sir,' said I, taking off a
+cap which I wore on my head.  'Good evening,' said the old man; and then,
+looking at me, 'How's this?' said he, 'you aren't, sure, the child I met
+in the morning?'  'Yes,' said I, 'I am; what makes you doubt it?'  'Why,
+you were then all froth and conceit,' said the old man, 'and now you take
+off your cap to me.'  'I beg your pardon,' said I, 'if I was frothy and
+conceited; it ill becomes a child like me to be so.'  'That's true,
+dear,' said the old man; 'well, as you have begged my pardon, I truly
+forgive you.'  'Thank you,' said I; 'have you caught any more of those
+things?'  'Only four or five,' said the old man; 'they are getting
+scarce, though this used to be a great neighbourhood for them.'  'And
+what do you do with them?' said I; 'do you carry them home and play with
+them?'  'I sometimes play with one or two that I tame,' said the old man;
+'but I hunt them mostly for the fat which they contain, out of which I
+make unguents which are good for various sore troubles, especially for
+the rheumatism.'  'And do you get your living by hunting these
+creatures?' I demanded.  'Not altogether,' said the old man; 'besides
+being a viper-hunter, I am what they call a herbalist, one who knows the
+virtue of particular herbs; I gather them at the proper season, to make
+medicines with for the sick.'  'And do you live in the neighbourhood?' I
+demanded.  'You seem very fond of asking questions, child.  No, I do not
+live in this neighbourhood in particular, I travel about; I have not been
+in this neighbourhood till lately for some years.'
+
+From this time the old man and myself formed an acquaintance; I often
+accompanied him in his wanderings about the neighbourhood, and, on two or
+three occasions, assisted him in catching the reptiles which he hunted.
+He generally carried a viper with him which he had made quite tame, and
+from which he had extracted the poisonous fangs; it would dance and
+perform various kinds of tricks.  He was fond of telling me anecdotes
+connected with his adventures with the reptile species.  'But,' said he
+one day, sighing, 'I must shortly give up this business, I am no longer
+the man I was, I am become timid, and when a person is timid in viper-
+hunting, he had better leave off, as it is quite clear his virtue is
+leaving him.  I got a fright some years ago, which I am quite sure I
+shall never get the better of; my hand has been shaky more or less ever
+since.'  'What frightened you?' said I.  'I had better not tell you,'
+said the old man, 'or you may be frightened too, lose your virtue, and be
+no longer good for the business.'  'I don't care,' said I; 'I don't
+intend to follow the business: I daresay I shall be an officer, like my
+father.'  'Well,' said the old man, 'I once saw the king of the vipers,
+and since then--'  'The king of the vipers!' said I, interrupting him;
+'have the vipers a king?'  'As sure as we have,' said the old man--'as
+sure as we have King George to rule over us, have these reptiles a king
+to rule over them.'  'And where did you see him?' said I.  'I will tell
+you,' said the old man, 'though I don't like talking about the matter.  It
+may be about seven years ago that I happened to be far down yonder to the
+west, on the other side of England, nearly two hundred miles from here,
+following my business.  It was a very sultry day, I remember, and I had
+been out several hours catching creatures.  It might be about three
+o'clock in the afternoon, when I found myself on some heathy land near
+the sea, on the ridge of a hill, the side of which, nearly as far down as
+the sea, was heath; but on the top there was arable ground, which had
+been planted, and from which the harvest had been gathered--oats or
+barley, I know not which--but I remember that the ground was covered with
+stubble.  Well, about three o'clock, as I told you before, what with the
+heat of the day and from having walked about for hours in a lazy way, I
+felt very tired; so I determined to have a sleep, and I laid myself down,
+my head just on the ridge of the hill, towards the field, and my body
+over the side down amongst the heath; my bag, which was nearly filled
+with creatures, lay at a little distance from my face; the creatures were
+struggling in it, I remember, and I thought to myself, how much more
+comfortably off I was than they; I was taking my ease on the nice open
+hill, cooled with the breezes, whilst they were in the nasty close bag,
+coiling about one another, and breaking their very hearts, all to no
+purpose: and I felt quite comfortable and happy in the thought, and
+little by little closed my eyes, and fell into the sweetest snooze that
+ever I was in in all my life; and there I lay over the hill's side, with
+my head half in the field, I don't know how long, all dead asleep.  At
+last it seemed to me that I heard a noise in my sleep, something like a
+thing moving, very faint, however, far away; then it died, and then it
+came again upon my ear as I slept, and now it appeared almost as if I
+heard crackle, crackle; then it died again, or I became yet more dead
+asleep than before, I know not which, but I certainly lay some time
+without hearing it.  All of a sudden I became awake, and there was I, on
+the ridge of the hill, with my cheek on the ground towards the stubble,
+with a noise in my ear like that of something moving towards me amongst
+the stubble of the field; well, I lay a moment or two listening to the
+noise, and then I became frightened, for I did not like the noise at all,
+it sounded so odd; so I rolled myself on my belly, and looked towards the
+stubble.  Mercy upon us! there was a huge snake, or rather a dreadful
+viper, for it was all yellow and gold, moving towards me, bearing its
+head about a foot and a half above the ground, the dry stubble crackling
+beneath its outrageous belly.  It might be about five yards off when I
+first saw it, making straight towards me, child, as if it would devour
+me.  I lay quite still, for I was stupefied with horror, whilst the
+creature came still nearer; and now it was nearly upon me, when it
+suddenly drew back a little, and then--what do you think?--it lifted its
+head and chest high in the air, and high over my face as I looked up,
+flickering at me with its tongue as if it would fly at my face.  Child,
+what I felt at that moment I can scarcely say, but it was a sufficient
+punishment for all the sins I ever committed; and there we two were, I
+looking up at the viper, and the viper looking down upon me, flickering
+at me with its tongue.  It was only the kindness of God that saved me:
+all at once there was a loud noise, the report of a gun, for a fowler was
+shooting at a covey of birds, a little way off in the stubble.  Whereupon
+the viper sunk its head, and immediately made off over the ridge of the
+hill, down in the direction of the sea.  As it passed by me, however--and
+it passed close by me--it hesitated a moment, as if it was doubtful
+whether it should not seize me; it did not, however, but made off down
+the hill.  It has often struck me that he was angry with me, and came
+upon me unawares for presuming to meddle with his people, as I have
+always been in the habit of doing.'
+
+'But,' said I, 'how do you know that it was the king of the vipers?'
+
+'How do I know!' said the old man, 'who else should it be?  There was as
+much difference between it and other reptiles as between King George and
+other people.'
+
+'Is King George, then, different from other people?' I demanded.
+
+'Of course,' said the old man; 'I have never seen him myself, but I have
+heard people say that he is a ten times greater man than other folks;
+indeed, it stands to reason that he must be different from the rest, else
+people would not be so eager to see him.  Do you think, child, that
+people would be fools enough to run a matter of twenty or thirty miles to
+see the king, provided King George--'
+
+'Haven't the French a king?' I demanded.
+
+'Yes,' said the old man, 'or something much the same, and a queer one he
+is; not quite so big as King George, they say, but quite as terrible a
+fellow.  What of him?'
+
+'Suppose he should come to Norman Cross!'
+
+'What should he do at Norman Cross, child?'
+
+'Why, you were talking about the vipers in your bag breaking their
+hearts, and so on, and their king coming to help them.  Now, suppose the
+French king should hear of his people being in trouble at Norman Cross,
+and--'
+
+'He can't come, child,' said the old man, rubbing his hands, 'the water
+lies between.  The French don't like the water; neither vipers nor
+Frenchmen take kindly to the water, child.'
+
+{picture:'There we two were, I looking up at the viper, and the viper
+looking down upon me, flickering at me with its tongue.': page36.jpg}
+
+When the old man left the country, which he did a few days after the
+conversation which I have just related, he left me the reptile which he
+had tamed and rendered quite harmless by removing the fangs.  I was in
+the habit of feeding it with milk, and frequently carried it abroad with
+me in my walks.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V
+
+
+The tent--Man and woman--Dark and swarthy--Manner of speaking--Bad
+money--Transfixed--Faltering tone--Little basket--High opinion--Plenty of
+good--Keeping guard--Tilted cart--Rubricals--Jasper--The right sort--The
+horseman of the lane--John Newton--The alarm--Gentle brothers.
+
+One day it happened that, being on my rambles, I entered a green lane
+which I had never seen before; at first it was rather narrow, but as I
+advanced it became considerably wider; in the middle was a driftway with
+deep ruts, but right and left was a space carpeted with a sward of
+trefoil and clover; there was no lack of trees, chiefly ancient oaks,
+which, flinging out their arms from either side, nearly formed a canopy,
+and afforded a pleasing shelter from the rays of the sun, which was
+burning fiercely above.  Suddenly a group of objects attracted my
+attention.  Beneath one of the largest of the trees, upon the grass, was
+a kind of low tent or booth, from the top of which a thin smoke was
+curling; beside it stood a couple of light carts, whilst two or three
+lean horses or ponies were cropping the herbage which was growing nigh.
+Wondering to whom this odd tent could belong, I advanced till I was close
+before it, when I found that it consisted of two tilts, like those of
+waggons, placed upon the ground and fronting each other, connected behind
+by a sail or large piece of canvas which was but partially drawn across
+the top; upon the ground, in the intervening space, was a fire, over
+which, supported by a kind of iron crowbar, hung a caldron; my advance
+had been so noiseless as not to alarm the inmates, who consisted of a man
+and woman, who sat apart, one on each side of the fire; they were both
+busily employed--the man was carding plaited straw, whilst the woman
+seemed to be rubbing something with a white powder, some of which lay on
+a plate beside her; suddenly the man looked up, and, perceiving me,
+uttered a strange kind of cry, and the next moment both the woman and
+himself were on their feet and rushing out upon me.
+
+I retreated a few steps, yet without turning to flee.  I was not,
+however, without apprehension, which, indeed, the appearance of these two
+people was well calculated to inspire: the woman was a stout figure,
+seemingly between thirty and forty; she wore no cap, and her long hair
+fell on either side of her head like horse-tails half-way down her waist;
+her skin was dark and swarthy, like that of a toad, and the expression of
+her countenance was particularly evil; her arms were bare, and her bosom
+was but half concealed by a slight bodice, below which she wore a coarse
+petticoat, her only other article of dress.  The man was somewhat
+younger, but of a figure equally wild; his frame was long and lathy, but
+his arms were remarkably short, his neck was rather bent, he squinted
+slightly, and his mouth was much awry; his complexion was dark, but,
+unlike that of the woman, was more ruddy than livid; there was a deep
+scar on his cheek, something like the impression of a halfpenny.  The
+dress was quite in keeping with the figure: in his hat, which was
+slightly peaked, was stuck a peacock's feather; over a waistcoat of hide,
+untanned and with the hair upon it, he wore a rough jerkin of russet hue;
+smallclothes of leather, which had probably once belonged to a soldier,
+but with which pipeclay did not seem to have come in contact for many a
+year, protected his lower man as far as the knee; his legs were cased in
+long stockings of blue worsted, and on his shoes he wore immense
+old-fashioned buckles.
+
+Such were the two beings who now came rushing upon me; the man was rather
+in advance, brandishing a ladle in his hand.
+
+'So I have caught you at last,' said he; 'I'll teach ye, you young
+highwayman, to come skulking about my properties!'
+
+Young as I was, I remarked that his manner of speaking was different from
+that of any people with whom I had been in the habit of associating.  It
+was quite as strange as his appearance, and yet it nothing resembled the
+foreign English which I had been in the habit of hearing through the
+palisades of the prison; he could scarcely be a foreigner.
+
+'Your properties!' said I; 'I am in the King's Lane.  Why did you put
+them there, if you did not wish them to be seen?'
+
+'On the spy,' said the woman, 'hey?  I'll drown him in the sludge in the
+toad-pond over the hedge.'
+
+'So we will,' said the man, 'drown him anon in the mud!'
+
+'Drown me, will you?' said I; 'I should like to see you!  What's all this
+about?  Was it because I saw you with your hands full of straw plait, and
+my mother there--'
+
+'Yes,' said the woman; 'what was I about?'
+
+_Myself_.  How should I know?  Making bad money, perhaps!
+
+And it will be as well here to observe, that at this time there was much
+bad money in circulation in the neighbourhood, generally supposed to be
+fabricated by the prisoners, so that this false coin and straw plait
+formed the standard subjects of conversation at Norman Cross.
+
+'I'll strangle thee,' said the beldame, dashing at me.  'Bad money, is
+it?'
+
+'Leave him to me, wifelkin,' said the man, interposing; 'you shall now
+see how I'll baste him down the lane.'
+
+_Myself_.  I tell you what, my chap, you had better put down that thing
+of yours; my father lies concealed within my tepid breast, and if to me
+you offer any harm or wrong, I'll call him forth to help me with his
+forked tongue.
+
+_Man_.  What do you mean, ye Bengui's bantling?  I never heard such
+discourse in all my life: playman's speech or Frenchman's talk--which, I
+wonder?  Your father!  Tell the mumping villain that if he comes near my
+fire I'll serve him out as I will you.  Take that-- Tiny Jesus! what have
+we got here?  Oh, delicate Jesus! what is the matter with the child?
+
+{picture:'Tiny Jesus! what have we got here?  Oh, delicate Jesus! what is
+the matter with the child?': page40.jpg}
+
+I had made a motion which the viper understood; and now, partly
+disengaging itself from my bosom, where it had lain perdu, it raised its
+head to a level with my face, and stared upon my enemy with its
+glittering eyes.
+
+The man stood like one transfixed, and the ladle, with which he had aimed
+a blow at me, now hung in the air like the hand which held it; his mouth
+was extended, and his cheeks became of a pale yellow, save alone that
+place which bore the mark which I have already described, and this shone
+now portentously, like fire.  He stood in this manner for some time; at
+last the ladle fell from his hand, and its falling appeared to rouse him
+from his stupor.
+
+'I say, wifelkin,' said he, in a faltering tone, 'did you ever see the
+like of this here?'
+
+But the woman had retreated to the tent, from the entrance of which her
+loathly face was now thrust, with an expression partly of terror and
+partly of curiosity.  After gazing some time longer at the viper and
+myself, the man stooped down and took up the ladle; then, as if somewhat
+more assured, he moved to the tent, where he entered into conversation
+with the beldame in a low voice.  Of their discourse, though I could hear
+the greater part of it, I understood not a single word; and I wondered
+what it could be, for I knew by the sound that it was not French.  At
+last the man, in a somewhat louder tone, appeared to put a question to
+the woman, who nodded her head affirmatively, and in a moment or two
+produced a small stool, which she delivered to him.  He placed it on the
+ground, close by the door of the tent, first rubbing it with his sleeve,
+as if for the purpose of polishing its surface.
+
+_Man_.  Now, my precious little gentleman, do sit down here by the poor
+people's tent; we wish to be civil in our slight way.  Don't be angry,
+and say no; but look kindly upon us, and satisfied, my precious little
+God Almighty.
+
+_Woman_.  Yes, my gorgeous angel, sit down by the poor bodies' fire, and
+eat a sweetmeat.  We want to ask you a question or two; only first put
+that serpent away.
+
+_Myself_.  I can sit down, and bid the serpent go to sleep, that's easy
+enough; but as for eating a sweetmeat, how can I do that?  I have not got
+one, and where am I to get it?
+
+_Woman_.  Never fear, my tiny tawny, we can give you one, such as you
+never ate, I daresay, however far you may have come from.
+
+The serpent sank into its usual resting-place, and I sat down on the
+stool.  The woman opened a box, and took out a strange little basket or
+hamper, not much larger than a man's fist, and formed of a delicate kind
+of matting.  It was sewed at the top; but, ripping it open with a knife,
+she held it to me, and I saw, to my surprise, that it contained candied
+fruits of a dark green hue, tempting enough to one of my age.  'There, my
+tiny,' said she; 'taste, and tell me how you like them.'
+
+'Very much,' said I; 'where did you get them?'
+
+The beldame leered upon me for a moment, then, nodding her head thrice,
+with a knowing look, said, 'Who knows better than yourself, my tawny?'
+
+Now, I knew nothing about the matter; but I saw that these strange people
+had conceived a very high opinion of the abilities of their visitor,
+which I was nothing loth to encourage.  I therefore answered boldly, 'Ah!
+who indeed!'
+
+'Certainly,' said the man; 'who should know better than yourself, or so
+well?  And now, my tiny one, let me ask you one thing--you didn't come to
+do us any harm?'
+
+'No,' said I, 'I had no dislike to you; though, if you were to meddle
+with me--'
+
+_Man_.  Of course, my gorgeous, of course you would; and quite right too.
+Meddle with you!--what right have we?  I should say, it would not be
+quite safe.  I see how it is; you are one of them there;--and he bent his
+head towards his left shoulder.
+
+_Myself_.  Yes, I am one of them--for I thought he was alluding to the
+soldiers,--you had best mind what you are about, I can tell you.
+
+_Man_.  Don't doubt we will for our own sake; Lord bless you, wifelkin,
+only think that we should see one of them there when we least thought
+about it.  Well, I have heard of such things, though I never thought to
+see one; however, seeing is believing.  Well! now you are come, and are
+not going to do us any mischief, I hope you will stay; you can do us
+plenty of good if you will.
+
+_Myself_.  What good could I do you?
+
+_Man_.  What good? plenty!  Would you not bring us luck?  I have heard
+say that one of them there always does, if it will but settle down.  Stay
+with us, you shall have a tilted cart all to yourself if you like.  We'll
+make you our little God Almighty, and say our prayers to you every
+morning!
+
+_Myself_.  That would be nice; and, if you were to give me plenty of
+these things, I should have no objection.  But what would my father say?
+I think he would hardly let me.
+
+_Man_.  Why not? he would be with you; and kindly would we treat him.
+Indeed, without your father you would be nothing at all.
+
+_Myself_.  That's true; but I do not think he could be spared from his
+regiment.  I have heard him say that they could do nothing without him.
+
+_Man_.  His regiment!  What are you talking about?--what does the child
+mean?
+
+_Myself_.  What do I mean!--why, that my father is an officer-man at the
+barracks yonder, keeping guard over the French prisoners.
+
+_Man_.  Oh! then that sap is not your father?
+
+_Myself_.  What, the snake?  Why, no!  Did you think he was?
+
+_Man_.  To be sure we did.  Didn't you tell me so?
+
+_Myself_.  Why, yes; but who would have thought you would have believed
+it?  It is a tame one.  I hunt vipers, and tame them.
+
+_Man_.  O-h!
+
+'O-h!' grunted the woman, 'that's it, is it?'
+
+The man and woman, who during this conversation had resumed their former
+positions within the tent, looked at each other with a queer look of
+surprise, as if somewhat disconcerted at what they now heard.  They then
+entered into discourse with each other in the same strange tongue which
+had already puzzled me.  At length the man looked me in the face, and
+said, somewhat hesitatingly, 'So you are not one of them there after
+all?'
+
+_Myself_.  One of them there?  I don't know what you mean.
+
+_Man_.  Why, we have been thinking you were a goblin--a devilkin!
+However, I see how it is: you are a sap-engro, a chap who catches snakes,
+and plays tricks with them!  Well, it comes very nearly to the same
+thing; and if you please to list with us, and bear us pleasant company,
+we shall be glad of you.  I'd take my oath upon it, that we might make a
+mort of money by you and that sap, and the tricks it could do; and, as
+you seem fly to everything, I shouldn't wonder if you would make a prime
+hand at telling fortunes.
+
+'I shouldn't wonder,' said I.
+
+_Man_.  Of course.  And you might still be our God Almighty, or at any
+rate our clergyman, so you should live in a tilted cart by yourself, and
+say prayers to us night and morning--to wifelkin here, and all our
+family; there's plenty of us when we are all together: as I said before,
+you seem fly, I shouldn't wonder if you could read?
+
+'Oh yes!' said I, 'I can read'; and, eager to display my accomplishments,
+I took my book out of my pocket, and, opening it at random, proceeded to
+read how a certain man, whilst wandering about a certain solitary island,
+entered a cave, the mouth of which was overgrown with brushwood, and how
+he was nearly frightened to death in that cave by something which he saw.
+
+'That will do,' said the man; 'that's the kind of prayers for me and my
+family, aren't they, wifelkin?  I never heard more delicate prayers in
+all my life!  Why, they beat the rubricals hollow!--and here comes my son
+Jasper.  I say, Jasper, here's a young sap-engro that can read, and is
+more fly than yourself.  Shake hands with him; I wish ye to be two
+brothers.'
+
+With a swift but stealthy pace Jasper came towards us from the farther
+part of the lane; on reaching the tent he stood still, and looked fixedly
+upon me as I sat upon the stool; I looked fixedly upon him.  A queer look
+had Jasper; he was a lad of some twelve or thirteen years, with long
+arms, unlike the singular being who called himself his father; his
+complexion was ruddy, but his face was seamed, though it did not bear the
+peculiar scar which disfigured the countenance of the other; nor, though
+roguish enough, a certain evil expression which that of the other bore,
+and which the face of the woman possessed in a yet more remarkable
+degree.  For the rest, he wore drab breeches, with certain strings at the
+knee, a rather gay waistcoat, and tolerably white shirt; under his arm he
+bore a mighty whip of whalebone with a brass knob, and upon his head was
+a hat without either top or brim.
+
+'There, Jasper! shake hands with the sap-engro.'
+
+'Can he box, father?' said Jasper, surveying me rather contemptuously.  'I
+should think not, he looks so puny and small.'
+
+'Hold your peace, fool!' said the man; 'he can do more than that--I tell
+you he's fly: he carries a sap about, which would sting a ninny like you
+to dead.'
+
+'What, a sap-engro!' said the boy, with a singular whine, and, stooping
+down, he leered curiously in my face, kindly, however, and then patted me
+on the head.  'A sap-engro,' he ejaculated; 'lor!'
+
+'Yes, and one of the right sort,' said the man; 'I am glad we have met
+with him, he is going to list with us, and be our clergyman and God
+Almighty, ain't you, my tawny?'
+
+'I don't know,' said I; 'I must see what my father will say.'
+
+'Your father; bah!'--but here he stopped, for a sound was heard like the
+rapid galloping of a horse, not loud and distinct as on a road, but dull
+and heavy as if upon a grass sward; nearer and nearer it came, and the
+man, starting up, rushed out of the tent, and looked around anxiously.  I
+arose from the stool upon which I had been seated, and just at that
+moment, amidst a crashing of boughs and sticks, a man on horseback
+bounded over the hedge into the lane at a few yards' distance from where
+we were: from the impetus of the leap the horse was nearly down on his
+knees; the rider, however, by dint of vigorous handling of the reins,
+prevented him from falling, and then rode up to the tent.  ''Tis Nat,'
+said the man; 'what brings him here?'  The new-comer was a stout burly
+fellow, about the middle age; he had a savage determined look, and his
+face was nearly covered over with carbuncles; he wore a broad slouching
+hat, and was dressed in a gray coat, cut in a fashion which I afterwards
+learnt to be the genuine Newmarket cut, the skirts being exceedingly
+short; his waistcoat was of red plush, and he wore broad corduroy
+breeches and white top-boots.  The steed which carried him was of iron
+gray, spirited and powerful, but covered with sweat and foam.  The fellow
+glanced fiercely and suspiciously around, and said something to the man
+of the tent in a harsh and rapid voice.  A short and hurried conversation
+ensued in the strange tongue.  I could not take my eyes off this
+new-comer.  Oh, that half-jockey, half-bruiser countenance, I never
+forgot it!  More than fifteen years afterwards I found myself amidst a
+crowd before Newgate; a gallows was erected, and beneath it stood a
+criminal, a notorious malefactor.  I recognised him at once; the horseman
+of the lane is now beneath the fatal tree, but nothing altered; still the
+same man; jerking his head to the right and left with the same fierce and
+under glance, just as if the affairs of this world had the same kind of
+interest to the last; gray coat of Newmarket cut, plush waistcoat,
+corduroys, and boots, nothing altered; but the head, alas! is bare, and
+so is the neck.  Oh, crime and virtue, virtue and crime!--it was old John
+Newton, I think, who, when he saw a man going to be hanged, said, 'There
+goes John Newton, but for the grace of God!'
+
+But the lane, the lane, all was now in confusion in the lane; the man and
+woman were employed in striking the tents and in making hurried
+preparations for departure; the boy Jasper was putting the harness upon
+the ponies and attaching them to the carts; and, to increase the
+singularity of the scene, two or three wild-looking women and girls, in
+red cloaks and immense black beaver bonnets, came from I know not what
+direction, and, after exchanging a few words with the others, commenced
+with fierce and agitated gestures to assist them in their occupation.  The
+rider meanwhile sat upon his horse, but evidently in a state of great
+impatience; he muttered curses between his teeth, spurred the animal
+furiously, and then reined it in, causing it to rear itself up nearly
+perpendicular.  At last he said, 'Curse ye for Romans, how slow ye are!
+well, it is no business of mine, stay here all day if you like; I have
+given ye warning, I am off to the big north road.  However, before I go,
+you had better give me all you have of that.'
+
+'Truly spoken, Nat, my pal,' said the man; 'give it him, mother.  There
+it is; now be off as soon as you please, and rid us of evil company.'
+
+The woman had handed him two bags formed of stocking, half full of
+something heavy, which looked through them for all the world like money
+of some kind.  The fellow, on receiving them, thrust them without
+ceremony into the pockets of his coat, and then, without a word of
+farewell salutation, departed at a tremendous rate, the hoofs of his
+horse thundering for a long time on the hard soil of the neighbouring
+road, till the sound finally died away in the distance.  The strange
+people were not slow in completing their preparations, and then, flogging
+their animals terrifically, hurried away seemingly in the same direction.
+
+The boy Jasper was last of the band.  As he was following the rest, he
+stopped suddenly, and looked on the ground appearing to muse; then,
+turning round, he came up to me where I was standing, leered in my face,
+and then, thrusting out his hand, he said, 'Good-bye, Sap, I daresay we
+shall meet again, remember we are brothers; two gentle brothers.'
+
+Then whining forth, 'What a sap-engro, lor!' he gave me a parting leer,
+and hastened away.
+
+I remained standing in the lane gazing after the retreating company.  'A
+strange set of people,' said I at last; 'wonder who they can be?'
+
+{picture:Then whining forth, 'What a sap-engro, lor!' he gave me a
+parting leer, and hastened away: page47.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI
+
+
+Three years--Lilly's grammar--Proficiency--Ignorant of figures--The
+school bell--Order of succession--Persecution--What are we to
+do?--Northward--A goodly scene--Haunted ground--Feats of
+chivalry--Rivers--Over the brig.
+
+Years passed on, even three years; during this period I had increased
+considerably in stature and in strength, and, let us hope, improved in
+mind; for I had entered on the study of the Latin language.  The very
+first person to whose care I was intrusted for the acquisition of Latin
+was an old friend of my fathers, a clergyman who kept a seminary at a
+town the very next we visited after our departure from 'the Cross.'  Under
+his instruction, however, I continued only a few weeks, as we speedily
+left the place.  'Captain,' said this divine, when my father came to take
+leave of him on the eve of our departure, 'I have a friendship for you,
+and therefore wish to give you a piece of advice concerning this son of
+yours.  You are now removing him from my care; you do wrong, but we will
+let that pass.  Listen to me: there is but one good school-book in the
+world--the one I use in my seminary--Lilly's Latin grammar, in which your
+son has already made some progress.  If you are anxious for the success
+of your son in life, for the correctness of his conduct and the soundness
+of his principles, keep him to Lilly's grammar.  If you can by any means,
+either fair or foul, induce him to get by heart Lilly's Latin grammar,
+you may set your heart at rest with respect to him; I, myself, will be
+his warrant.  I never yet knew a boy that was induced, either by fair
+means or foul, to learn Lilly's Latin grammar by heart, who did not turn
+out a man, provided he lived long enough.'
+
+My father, who did not understand the classical languages, received with
+respect the advice of his old friend, and from that moment conceived the
+highest opinion of Lilly's Latin grammar.  During three years I studied
+Lilly's Latin grammar under the tuition of various schoolmasters, for I
+travelled with the regiment, and in every town in which we were
+stationary I was invariably (God bless my father!) sent to the classical
+academy of the place.  It chanced, by good fortune, that in the
+generality of these schools the grammar of Lilly was in use; when,
+however, that was not the case, it made no difference in my educational
+course, my father always stipulating with the masters that I should be
+daily examined in Lilly.  At the end of the three years I had the whole
+by heart; you had only to repeat the first two or three words of any
+sentence in any part of the book, and forthwith I would open cry,
+commencing without blundering and hesitation, and continue till you were
+glad to beg me to leave off, with many expressions of admiration at my
+proficiency in the Latin language.  Sometimes, however, to convince you
+how well I merited these encomiums, I would follow you to the bottom of
+the stair, and even into the street, repeating in a kind of sing-song
+measure the sonorous lines of the golden schoolmaster.  If I am here
+asked whether I understood anything of what I had got by heart, I
+reply--'Never mind, I understand it all now, and believe that no one ever
+yet got Lilly's Latin grammar by heart when young, who repented of the
+feat at a mature age.'
+
+And, when my father saw that I had accomplished my task, he opened his
+mouth, and said, 'Truly, this is more than I expected.  I did not think
+that there had been so much in you, either of application or capacity;
+you have now learnt all that is necessary, if my friend Dr. B---'s
+opinion was sterling, as I have no doubt it was.  You are still a child,
+however, and must yet go to school, in order that you may be kept out of
+evil company.  Perhaps you may still contrive, now you have exhausted the
+barn, to pick up a grain or two in the barn-yard.  You are still ignorant
+of figures, I believe, not that I would mention figures in the same day
+with Lilly's grammar.'
+
+These words were uttered in a place called ---, in the north, or in the
+road to the north, to which, for some time past, our corps had been
+slowly advancing.  I was sent to the school of the place, which chanced
+to be a day school.  It was a somewhat extraordinary one, and a somewhat
+extraordinary event occurred to me within its walls.
+
+It occupied part of the farther end of a small plain, or square, at the
+outskirts of the town, close to some extensive bleaching fields.  It was
+a long low building of one room, with no upper story; on the top was a
+kind of wooden box, or sconce, which I at first mistook for a
+pigeon-house, but which in reality contained a bell, to which was
+attached a rope, which, passing through the ceiling, hung dangling in the
+middle of the school-room.  I am the more particular in mentioning this
+appurtenance, as I had soon occasion to scrape acquaintance with it in a
+manner not very agreeable to my feelings.  The master was very proud of
+his bell, if I might judge from the fact of his eyes being frequently
+turned to that part of the ceiling from which the rope depended.  Twice
+every day, namely, after the morning and evening tasks had been gone
+through, were the boys rung out of school by the monotonous jingle of
+this bell.  This ringing out was rather a lengthy affair, for, as the
+master was a man of order and method, the boys were only permitted to go
+out of the room one by one; and as they were rather numerous, amounting,
+at least, to one hundred, and were taught to move at a pace of suitable
+decorum, at least a quarter of an hour elapsed from the commencement of
+the march before the last boy could make his exit.  The office of bell-
+ringer was performed by every boy successively; and it so happened that,
+the very first day of my attendance at the school, the turn to ring the
+bell had, by order of succession, arrived at the place which had been
+allotted to me; for the master, as I have already observed, was a man of
+method and order, and every boy had a particular seat, to which he became
+a fixture as long as he continued at the school.
+
+So, upon this day, when the tasks were done and completed, and the boys
+sat with their hats and caps in their hands, anxiously expecting the
+moment of dismissal, it was suddenly notified to me, by the urchins who
+sat nearest to me, that I must get up and ring the bell.  Now, as this
+was the first time that I had been at the school, I was totally
+unacquainted with the process, which I had never seen, and, indeed, had
+never heard of till that moment.  I therefore sat still, not imagining it
+possible that any such duty could be required of me.  But now, with not a
+little confusion, I perceived that the eyes of all the boys in the school
+were fixed upon me.  Presently there were nods and winks in the direction
+of the bell-rope; and, as these produced no effect, uncouth visages were
+made, like those of monkeys when enraged; teeth were gnashed, tongues
+thrust out, and even fists were bent at me.  The master, who stood at the
+end of the room, with a huge ferule under his arm, bent full upon me a
+look of stern appeal; and the ushers, of whom there were four, glared
+upon me, each from his own particular corner, as I vainly turned, in one
+direction and another, in search of one reassuring look.
+
+But now, probably in obedience to a sign from the master, the boys in my
+immediate neighbourhood began to maltreat me. Some pinched me with their
+fingers, some buffeted me, whilst others pricked me with pins, or the
+points of compasses.  These arguments were not without effect.  I sprang
+from my seat, and endeavoured to escape along a double line of benches,
+thronged with boys of all ages, from the urchin of six or seven to the
+nondescript of sixteen or seventeen.  It was like running the gauntlet;
+every one, great or small, pinching, kicking, or otherwise maltreating
+me, as I passed by.
+
+Goaded on in this manner, I at length reached the middle of the room,
+where dangled the bell-rope, the cause of all my sufferings.  I should
+have passed it--for my confusion was so great that I was quite at a loss
+to comprehend what all this could mean, and almost believed myself under
+the influence of an ugly dream--but now the boys, who were seated in
+advance in the row, arose with one accord, and barred my farther
+progress; and one, doubtless more sensible than the rest, seizing the
+rope, thrust it into my hand.  I now began to perceive that the dismissal
+of the school, and my own release from torment, depended upon this
+selfsame rope.  I therefore, in a fit of desperation, pulled it once or
+twice, and then left off, naturally supposing that I had done quite
+enough.  The boys who sat next the door no sooner heard the bell, than,
+rising from their seats, they moved out at the door.  The bell, however,
+had no sooner ceased to jingle, than they stopped short, and, turning
+round, stared at the master, as much as to say, 'What are we to do now?'
+This was too much for the patience of the man of method, which my
+previous stupidity had already nearly exhausted.  Dashing forward into
+the middle of the room, he struck me violently on the shoulders with his
+ferule, and, snatching the rope out of my hand, exclaimed, with a
+stentorian voice, and genuine Yorkshire accent, 'Prodigy of ignorance!
+dost not even know how to ring a bell?  Must I myself instruct thee?'  He
+then commenced pulling at the bell with such violence that long before
+half the school was dismissed the rope broke, and the rest of the boys
+had to depart without their accustomed music.
+
+But I must not linger here, though I could say much about the school and
+the pedagogue highly amusing and diverting, which, however, I suppress,
+in order to make way for matters of yet greater interest.  On we went,
+northward, northward! and, as we advanced, I saw that the country was
+becoming widely different from those parts of merry England in which we
+had previously travelled.  It was wilder, and less cultivated, and more
+broken with hills and hillocks.  The people, too, of these regions
+appeared to partake of something of the character of their country.  They
+were coarsely dressed; tall and sturdy of frame; their voices were deep
+and guttural; and the half of the dialect which they spoke was
+unintelligible to my ears.
+
+I often wondered where we could be going, for I was at this time about as
+ignorant of geography as I was of most other things.  However, I held my
+peace, asked no questions, and patiently awaited the issue.
+
+Northward, northward, still!  And it came to pass that, one morning, I
+found myself extended on the bank of a river.  It was a beautiful morning
+of early spring; small white clouds were floating in the heaven,
+occasionally veiling the countenance of the sun, whose light, as they
+retired, would again burst forth, coursing like a race-horse over the
+scene--and a goodly scene it was!  Before me, across the water, on an
+eminence, stood a white old city, surrounded with lofty walls, above
+which rose the tops of tall houses, with here and there a church or
+steeple.  To my right hand was a long and massive bridge, with many
+arches, and of antique architecture, which traversed the river.  The
+river was a noble one; the broadest that I had hitherto seen.  Its
+waters, of a greenish tinge, poured with impetuosity beneath the narrow
+arches to meet the sea, close at hand, as the boom of the billows
+breaking distinctly upon a beach declared.  There were songs upon the
+river from the fisher-barks; and occasionally a chorus, plaintive and
+wild, such as I had never heard before, the words of which I did not
+understand, but which, at the present time, down the long avenue of
+years, seem in memory's ear to sound like 'Horam, coram, dago.'  Several
+robust fellows were near me, some knee-deep in water, employed in hauling
+the seine upon the strand.  Huge fish were struggling amidst the
+meshes--princely salmon,--their brilliant mail of blue and silver
+flashing in the morning beam; so goodly and gay a scene, in truth, had
+never greeted my boyish eye.
+
+And, as I gazed upon the prospect, my bosom began to heave, and my tears
+to trickle.  Was it the beauty of the scene which gave rise to these
+emotions?  Possibly; for though a poor ignorant child--a half-wild
+creature--I was not insensible to the loveliness of nature, and took
+pleasure in the happiness and handiworks of my fellow-creatures.  Yet,
+perhaps, in something more deep and mysterious the feelings which then
+pervaded me might originate.  Who can lie down on Elvir Hill without
+experiencing something of the sorcery of the place?  Flee from Elvir
+Hill, young swain, or the maids of Elle will have power over you, and you
+will go elf-wild!--so say the Danes.  I had unconsciously laid myself
+down upon haunted ground; and I am willing to imagine that what I then
+experienced was rather connected with the world of spirits and dreams
+than with what I actually saw and heard around me.  Surely the elves and
+genii of the place were conversing, by some inscrutable means, with the
+principle of intelligence lurking within the poor uncultivated clod!
+Perhaps to that ethereal principle the wonders of the past, as connected
+with that stream, the glories of the present, and even the history of the
+future, were at that moment being revealed!  Of how many feats of
+chivalry had those old walls been witness, when hostile kings contended
+for their possession!--how many an army from the south and from the north
+had trod that old bridge!--what red and noble blood had crimsoned those
+rushing waters!-what strains had been sung, ay, were yet being sung, on
+its banks!--some soft as Doric reed; some fierce and sharp as those of
+Norwegian Skaldaglam; some as replete with wild and wizard force as
+Finland's runes, singing of Kalevala's moors, and the deeds of
+Woinomoinen!  Honour to thee, thou island stream!  Onward may thou ever
+roll, fresh and green, rejoicing in thy bright past, thy glorious
+present, and in vivid hope of a triumphant future!  Flow on, beautiful
+one!--which of the world's streams canst thou envy, with thy beauty and
+renown?  Stately is the Danube, rolling in its might through lands
+romantic with the wild exploits of Turk, Polak, and Magyar!  Lovely is
+the Rhine! on its shelvy banks grows the racy grape; and strange old
+keeps of robber-knights of yore are reflected in its waters, from
+picturesque crags and airy headlands!--yet neither the stately Danube nor
+the beauteous Rhine, with all their fame, though abundant, needst thou
+envy, thou pure island stream!--and far less yon turbid river of old, not
+modern renown, gurgling beneath the walls of what was once proud Rome,
+towering Rome, Jupiter's town, but now vile Rome, crumbling Rome,
+Batuscha's town, far less needst thou envy the turbid Tiber of bygone
+fame, creeping sadly to the sea, surcharged with the abominations of
+modern Rome--how unlike to thee, thou pure island stream!
+
+And, as I lay on the bank and wept, there drew nigh to me a man in the
+habiliments of a fisher.  He was bare-legged, of a weather-beaten
+countenance, and of stature approaching to the gigantic.  'What is the
+callant greeting for?' said he, as he stopped and surveyed me.  'Has
+onybody wrought ye ony harm?'
+
+'Not that I know of,' I replied, rather guessing at than understanding
+his question; 'I was crying because I could not help it!  I say, old one,
+what is the name of this river?'
+
+'Hout!  I now see what you was greeting at--at your ain ignorance, nae
+doubt--'tis very great!  Weel, I will na fash you with reproaches, but
+even enlighten ye, since you seem a decent man's bairn, and you speir a
+civil question.  Yon river is called the Tweed; and yonder, over the
+brig, is Scotland.  Did ye never hear of the Tweed, my bonny man?'
+
+'No,' said I, as I rose from the grass, and proceeded to cross the bridge
+to the town at which we had arrived the preceding night; 'I never heard
+of it; but now I have seen it, I shall not soon forget it!'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII
+
+
+The Castle--A father's inquiries--Scotch language--A determination--Bui
+hin Digri--Good Scotchman--Difference of races--Ne'er a haggis--Pugnacious
+people--Wha are ye, man?--The Nor Loch--Gestures wild--The bicker--New
+Town champion--Wild-looking figure--Headlong.
+
+It was not long before we found ourselves at Edinburgh, or rather in the
+Castle, into which the regiment marched with drums beating, colours
+flying, and a long train of baggage-waggons behind.  The Castle was, as I
+suppose it is now, a garrison for soldiers.  Two other regiments were
+already there; the one an Irish, if I remember right, the other a small
+Highland corps.
+
+It is hardly necessary to say much about this Castle, which everybody has
+seen; on which account, doubtless, nobody has ever yet thought fit to
+describe it--at least that I am aware.  Be this as it may, I have no
+intention of describing it, and shall content myself with observing that
+we took up our abode in that immense building, or caserne, of modern
+erection, which occupies the entire eastern side of the bold rock on
+which the Castle stands.  A gallant caserne it was--the best and roomiest
+that I had hitherto seen--rather cold and windy, it is true, especially
+in the winter, but commanding a noble prospect of a range of distant
+hills, which I was told were 'the hieland hills,' and of a broad arm of
+the sea, which I heard somebody say was the Firth of Forth.
+
+My brother, who, for some years past, had been receiving his education in
+a certain celebrated school in England, was now with us; and it came to
+pass, that one day my father, as he sat at table, looked steadfastly on
+my brother and myself, and then addressed my mother:--'During my journey
+down hither, I have lost no opportunity of making inquiries about these
+people, the Scotch, amongst whom we now are, and since I have been here I
+have observed them attentively.  From what I have heard and seen, I
+should say that upon the whole they are a very decent set of people; they
+seem acute and intelligent, and I am told that their system of education
+is so excellent that every person is learned--more or less acquainted
+with Greek and Latin.  There is one thing, however, connected with them,
+which is a great drawback--the horrid jargon which they speak.  However
+learned they may be in Greek and Latin, their English is execrable; and
+yet I'm told it is not so bad as it was.  I was in company, the other
+day, with an Englishman who has resided here many years.  We were talking
+about the country and the people.  "I should like both very well," said
+I, "were it not for the language.  I wish sincerely our Parliament, which
+is passing so many foolish acts every year, would pass one to force these
+Scotch to speak English."  "I wish so, too," said he.  "The language is a
+disgrace to the British Government; but, if you had heard it twenty years
+ago, captain!--if you had heard it as it was spoken when I first came to
+Edinburgh!"'
+
+'Only custom,' said my mother.  'I daresay the language is now what it
+was then.'
+
+'I don't know,' said my father; 'though I daresay you are right; it could
+never have been worse than it is at present.  But now to the point.  Were
+it not for the language, which, if the boys were to pick it up, might
+ruin their prospects in life,--were it not for that, I should very much
+like to send them to a school there is in this place, which everybody
+talks about--the High School I think they call it.  'Tis said to be the
+best school in the whole island; but the idea of one's children speaking
+Scotch--broad Scotch!  I must think the matter over.'
+
+And he did think the matter over; and the result of his deliberation was
+a determination to send us to the school.  Let me call thee up before my
+mind's eye, High School, to which, every morning, the two English
+brothers took their way from the proud old Castle through the lofty
+streets of the Old Town.  High School!--called so, I scarcely know why;
+neither lofty in thyself nor by position, being situated in a flat
+bottom; oblong structure of tawny stone, with many windows fenced with
+iron netting--with thy long hall below, and thy five chambers above, for
+the reception of the five classes, into which the eight hundred urchins
+who styled thee instructress were divided.  Thy learned rector and his
+four subordinate dominies; thy strange old porter of the tall form and
+grizzled hair, hight Boee, and doubtless of Norse ancestry, as his name
+declares; perhaps of the blood of Bui hin Digri, the hero of northern
+song--the Jomsborg Viking who clove Thorsteinn Midlangr asunder in the
+dread sea battle of Horunga Vog, and who, when the fight was lost and his
+own two hands smitten off, seized two chests of gold with his bloody
+stumps, and, springing with them into the sea, cried to the scanty relics
+of his crew, 'Overboard now, all Bui's lads!'  Yes, I remember all about
+thee, and how at eight of every morn we were all gathered together with
+one accord in the long hall, from which, after the litanies had been read
+(for so I will call them, being an Episcopalian), the five classes from
+the five sets of benches trotted off in long files, one boy after the
+other, up the five spiral staircases of stone, each class to its
+destination; and well do I remember how we of the third sat hushed and
+still, watched by the eye of the dux, until the door opened, and in
+walked that model of a good Scotchman, the shrewd, intelligent, but warm-
+hearted and kind dominie, the respectable Carson.
+
+And in this school I began to construe the Latin language, which I had
+never done before, notwithstanding my long and diligent study of Lilly,
+which illustrious grammar was not used at Edinburgh, nor indeed known.
+Greek was only taught in the fifth or highest class, in which my brother
+was; as for myself, I never got beyond the third during the two years
+that I remained at this seminary.  I certainly acquired here a
+considerable insight in the Latin tongue; and, to the scandal of my
+father and horror of my mother, a thorough proficiency in the Scotch,
+which, in less than two months, usurped the place of the English, and so
+obstinately maintained its ground, that I still can occasionally detect
+its lingering remains.  I did not spend my time unpleasantly at this
+school, though, first of all, I had to pass through an ordeal.
+
+'Scotland is a better country than England,' said an ugly, blear-eyed
+lad, about a head and shoulders taller than myself, the leader of a gang
+of varlets who surrounded me in the playground, on the first day, as soon
+as the morning lesson was over.  'Scotland is a far better country than
+England, in every respect.'
+
+'Is it?' said I.  'Then you ought to be very thankful for not having been
+born in England.'
+
+'That's just what I am, ye loon; and every morning, when I say my
+prayers, I thank God for not being an Englishman.  The Scotch are a much
+better and braver people than the English.'
+
+'It may be so,' said I, 'for what I know--indeed, till I came here, I
+never heard a word either about the Scotch or their country.'
+
+'Are ye making fun of us, ye English puppy?' said the blear-eyed lad;
+'take that!' and I was presently beaten black and blue.  And thus did I
+first become aware of the difference of races and their antipathy to each
+other.
+
+'Bow to the storm, and it shall pass over you.'  I held my peace, and
+silently submitted to the superiority of the Scotch--_in numbers_.  This
+was enough; from an object of persecution I soon became one of patronage,
+especially amongst the champions of the class.  'The English,' said the
+blear-eyed lad, 'though a wee bit behind the Scotch in strength and
+fortitude, are nae to be sneezed at, being far ahead of the Irish, to say
+nothing of the French, a pack of cowardly scoundrels.  And with regard to
+the English country, it is na Scotland, it is true, but it has its gude
+properties; and, though there is ne'er a haggis in a' the land, there's
+an unco deal o' gowd and siller.  I respect England, for I have an auntie
+married there.'
+
+The Scotch are certainly a most pugnacious people; their whole history
+proves it.  Witness their incessant wars with the English in the olden
+time, and their internal feuds, highland and lowland, clan with clan,
+family with family, Saxon with Gael.  In my time, the schoolboys, for
+want, perhaps, of English urchins to contend with, were continually
+fighting with each other; every noon there was at least one pugilistic
+encounter, and sometimes three.  In one month I witnessed more of these
+encounters than I had ever previously seen under similar circumstances in
+England.  After all, there was not much harm done.  Harm! what harm could
+result from short chopping blows, a hug, and a tumble?  I was witness to
+many a sounding whack, some blood shed, 'a blue ee' now and then, but
+nothing more.  In England, on the contrary, where the lads were
+comparatively mild, gentle, and pacific, I had been present at more than
+one death caused by blows in boyish combats, in which the oldest of the
+victors had scarcely reached thirteen years; but these blows were in the
+jugular, given with the full force of the arm shot out horizontally from
+the shoulder.
+
+But the Scotch--though by no means proficients in boxing (and how should
+they box, seeing that they have never had a teacher?)--are, I repeat, a
+most pugnacious people; at least they were in my time.  Anything served
+them, that is, the urchins, as a pretence for a fray, or, Dorically
+speaking, a _bicker_; every street and close was at feud with its
+neighbour; the lads of the school were at feud with the young men of the
+college, whom they pelted in winter with snow, and in summer with stones;
+and then the feud between the old and new town!
+
+One day I was standing on the ramparts of the Castle on the south-western
+side which overhangs the green brae, where it slopes down into what was
+in those days the green swamp or morass, called by the natives of Auld
+Reekie the Nor Loch; it was a dark gloomy day, and a thin veil of mist
+was beginning to settle down upon the brae and the morass.  I could
+perceive, however, that there was a skirmish taking place in the latter
+spot.  I had an indistinct view of two parties--apparently of urchins--and
+I heard whoops and shrill cries: eager to know the cause of this
+disturbance, I left the Castle, and descending the brae reached the
+borders of the morass, where were a runnel of water and the remains of an
+old wall, on the other side of which a narrow path led across the swamp:
+upon this path at a little distance before me there was 'a bicker.'  I
+pushed forward, but had scarcely crossed the ruined wall and runnel, when
+the party nearest to me gave way, and in great confusion came running in
+my direction.  As they drew nigh, one of them shouted to me, 'Wha are ye,
+man? are ye o' the Auld Toon?'  I made no answer.  'Ha! ye are o' the New
+Toon; De'il tak ye, we'll moorder ye'; and the next moment a huge stone
+sung past my head.  'Let me be, ye fule bodies,' said I, 'I'm no of
+either of ye, I live yonder aboon in the Castle.'  'Ah! ye live in the
+Castle; then ye're an auld tooner; come gie us your help, man, and dinna
+stand there staring like a dunnot, we want help sair eneugh.  Here are
+stanes.'
+
+For my own part I wished for nothing better, and, rushing forward, I
+placed myself at the head of my new associates, and commenced flinging
+stones fast and desperately.  The other party now gave way in their turn,
+closely followed by ourselves; I was in the van, and about to stretch out
+my hand to seize the hindermost boy of the enemy, when, not being
+acquainted with the miry and difficult paths of the Nor Loch, and in my
+eagerness taking no heed of my footing, I plunged into a quagmire, into
+which I sank as far as my shoulders.  Our adversaries no sooner perceived
+this disaster, than, setting up a shout, they wheeled round and attacked
+us most vehemently.  Had my comrades now deserted me, my life had not
+been worth a straw's purchase, I should either have been smothered in the
+quag, or, what is more probable, had my brains beaten out with stones;
+but they behaved like true Scots, and fought stoutly around their
+comrade, until I was extricated, whereupon both parties retired, the
+night being near at hand.
+
+'Ye are na a bad hand at flinging stanes,' said the lad who first
+addressed me, as we now returned up the brae; 'your aim is right
+dangerous, mon, I saw how ye skelpit them, ye maun help us agin thae New
+Toon blackguards at our next bicker.'
+
+So to the next bicker I went, and to many more, which speedily followed
+as the summer advanced; the party to which I had given my help on the
+first occasion consisted merely of outlyers, posted about half-way up the
+hill, for the purpose of overlooking the movements of the enemy.
+
+Did the latter draw nigh in any considerable force, messengers were
+forthwith despatched to the 'Auld Toon,' especially to the filthy alleys
+and closes of the High Street, which forthwith would disgorge swarms of
+bare-headed and bare-footed 'callants,' who, with gestures wild and
+'eldrich screech and hollo,' might frequently be seen pouring down the
+sides of the hill.  I have seen upwards of a thousand engaged on either
+side in these frays, which I have no doubt were full as desperate as the
+fights described in the _Iliad_, and which were certainly much more
+bloody than the combats of modern Greece in the war of independence: the
+callants not only employed their hands in hurling stones, but not
+unfrequently slings; at the use of which they were very expert, and which
+occasionally dislodged teeth, shattered jaws, or knocked out an eye.  Our
+opponents certainly laboured under considerable disadvantage, being
+compelled not only to wade across a deceitful bog, but likewise to
+clamber up part of a steep hill, before they could attack us;
+nevertheless, their determination was such, and such their impetuosity,
+that we had sometimes difficulty enough to maintain our own.  I shall
+never forget one bicker, the last indeed which occurred at that time, as
+the authorities of the town, alarmed by the desperation of its character,
+stationed forthwith a body of police on the hill-side, to prevent, in
+future, any such breaches of the peace.
+
+It was a beautiful Sunday evening, the rays of the descending sun were
+reflected redly from the gray walls of the Castle, and from the black
+rocks on which it was founded.  The bicker had long since commenced,
+stones from sling and hand were flying; but the callants of the New Town
+were now carrying everything before them.
+
+A full-grown baker's apprentice was at their head; he was foaming with
+rage, and had taken the field, as I was told, in order to avenge his
+brother, whose eye had been knocked out in one of the late bickers.  He
+was no slinger or flinger, but brandished in his right hand the spoke of
+a cart-wheel, like my countryman Tom Hickathrift of old in his encounter
+with the giant of the Lincolnshire fen.  Protected by a piece of wicker-
+work attached to his left arm, he rushed on to the fray, disregarding the
+stones which were showered against him, and was ably seconded by his
+followers.  Our own party was chased half-way up the hill, where I was
+struck to the ground by the baker, after having been foiled in an attempt
+which I had made to fling a handful of earth into his eyes.  All now
+appeared lost, the Auld Toon was in full retreat.  I myself lay at the
+baker's feet, who had just raised his spoke, probably to give me the
+_coup de grace_,--it was an awful moment.  Just then I heard a shout and
+a rushing sound; a wild-looking figure is descending the hill with
+terrible bounds; it is a lad of some fifteen years; he is bare-headed,
+and his red uncombed hair stands on end like hedgehogs' bristles: his
+frame is lithy, like that of an antelope, but he has prodigious breadth
+of chest; he wears a military undress, that of the regiment, even of a
+drummer, for it is wild Davy, whom a month before I had seen enlisted on
+Leith Links to serve King George with drum and drumstick as long as his
+services might be required, and who, ere a week had elapsed, had smitten
+with his fist Drum-Major Elzigood, who, incensed at his inaptitude, had
+threatened him with his cane; he has been in confinement for weeks, this
+is the first day of his liberation, and he is now descending the hill
+with horrid bounds and shoutings; he is now about five yards distant, and
+the baker, who apprehends that something dangerous is at hand, prepares
+himself for the encounter; but what avails the strength of a baker, even
+full grown?--what avails the defence of a wicker shield?--what avails the
+wheel-spoke, should there be an opportunity of using it, against the
+impetus of an avalanche or a cannon-ball?--for to either of these might
+that wild figure be compared, which, at the distance of five yards,
+sprang at once with head, hands, feet and body, all together, upon the
+champion of the New Town, tumbling him to the earth amain.  And now it
+was the turn of the Old Town to triumph.  Our late discomfited host,
+returning on its steps, overwhelmed the fallen champion with blows of
+every kind, and then, led on by his vanquisher, who had assumed his arms,
+namely, the wheel-spoke and wicker shield, fairly cleared the brae of
+their adversaries, whom they drove down headlong into the morass.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII
+
+
+Expert climbers--The crags--Something red--The horrible edge--David
+Haggart--Fine materials--The greatest victory--Extraordinary robber--The
+ruling passion.
+
+Meanwhile I had become a daring cragsman, a character to which an English
+lad has seldom opportunities of aspiring; for in England there are
+neither crags nor mountains.  Of these, however, as is well known, there
+is no lack in Scotland, and the habits of individuals are invariably in
+harmony with the country in which they dwell.  The Scotch are expert
+climbers, and I was now a Scot in most things, particularly in language.
+The Castle in which I dwelt stood upon a rock, a bold and craggy one,
+which, at first sight, would seem to bid defiance to any feet save those
+of goats and chamois; but patience and perseverance generally enable
+mankind to overcome things which, at first sight, appear impossible.
+Indeed, what is there above man's exertions?  Unwearied determination
+will enable him to run with the horse, to swim with the fish, and
+assuredly to compete with the chamois and the goat in agility and
+sureness of foot.  To scale the rock was merely child's play for the
+Edinbro' callants.  It was my own favourite diversion.  I soon found that
+the rock contained all manner of strange crypts, crannies, and recesses,
+where owls nestled, and the weasel brought forth her young; here and
+there were small natural platforms, overgrown with long grass and various
+kinds of plants, where the climber, if so disposed, could stretch
+himself, and either give his eyes to sleep or his mind to thought; for
+capital places were these same platforms either for repose or meditation.
+The boldest features of the rock are descried on the northern side,
+where, after shelving down gently from the wall for some distance, it
+terminates abruptly in a precipice, black and horrible, of some three
+hundred feet at least, as if the axe of nature had been here employed
+cutting sheer down, and leaving behind neither excrescence nor spur--a
+dizzy precipice it is, assimilating much to those so frequent in the
+flinty hills of Northern Africa, and exhibiting some distant resemblance
+to that of Gibraltar, towering in its horridness above the Neutral
+Ground.
+
+It was now holiday time, and having nothing particular wherewith to
+occupy myself, I not unfrequently passed the greater part of the day upon
+the rocks.  Once, after scaling the western crags, and creeping round a
+sharp angle of the wall, overhung by a kind of watch-tower, I found
+myself on the northern side.  Still keeping close to the wall, I was
+proceeding onward, for I was bent upon a long excursion which should
+embrace half the circuit of the Castle, when suddenly my eye was
+attracted by the appearance of something red, far below me; I stopped
+short, and, looking fixedly upon it, perceived that it was a human being
+in a kind of red jacket, seated on the extreme verge of the precipice
+which I have already made a faint attempt to describe.  Wondering who it
+could be, I shouted; but it took not the slightest notice, remaining as
+immovable as the rock on which it sat.  'I should never have thought of
+going near that edge,' said I to myself; 'however, as you have done it,
+why should not I?  And I should like to know who you are.'  So I
+commenced the descent of the rock, but with great care, for I had as yet
+never been in a situation so dangerous; a slight moisture exuded from the
+palms of my hands, my nerves were tingling, and my brain was somewhat
+dizzy--and now I had arrived within a few yards of the figure, and had
+recognised it: it was the wild drummer who had turned the tide of battle
+in the bicker on the Castle Brae.  A small stone which I dislodged now
+rolled down the rock, and tumbled into the abyss close beside him.  He
+turned his head, and after looking at me for a moment somewhat vacantly,
+he resumed his former attitude.  I drew yet nearer to the horrible edge
+not close, however, for fear was on me.
+
+'What are you thinking of, David?' said I, as I sat behind him and
+trembled, for I repeat that I was afraid.
+
+_David Haggart_.  I was thinking of Willie Wallace.
+
+_Myself_.  You had better be thinking of yourself, man.  A strange place
+this to come to and think of William Wallace.
+
+_David Haggart_.  Why so?  Is not his tower just beneath our feet?
+
+_Myself_.  You mean the auld ruin by the side of the Nor Loch--the ugly
+stane bulk, from the foot of which flows the spring into the dyke where
+the watercresses grow?
+
+_David Haggart_.  Just sae, Geordie.
+
+_Myself_.  And why were ye thinking of him?  The English hanged him long
+since, as I have heard say.
+
+_David Haggart_.  I was thinking that I should wish to be like him.
+
+_Myself_.  Do ye mean that ye would wish to be hanged?
+
+_David Haggart_.  I wadna flinch from that, Geordie, if I might be a
+great man first.
+
+_Myself_.  And wha kens, Davie, how great you may be, even without
+hanging?  Are ye not in the high road of preferment?  Are ye not a bauld
+drummer already?  Wha kens how high ye may rise? perhaps to be general,
+or drum-major.
+
+_David Haggart_.  I hae nae wish to be drum-major; it were nae great
+things to be like the doited carle, Else-than-gude, as they call him;
+and, troth, he has nae his name for naething.  But I should have nae
+objection to be a general, and to fight the French and Americans, and win
+myself a name and a fame like Willie Wallace, and do brave deeds, such as
+I have been reading about in his story book.
+
+_Myself_.  Ye are a fule, Davie; the story book is full of lies.  Wallace,
+indeed! the wuddie rebel!  I have heard my father say that the Duke of
+Cumberland was worth twenty of Willie Wallace.
+
+_David Haggart_.  Ye had better sae naething agin Willie Wallace,
+Geordie, for, if ye do, De'il hae me, if I dinna tumble ye doon the
+craig.
+
+Fine materials in that lad for a hero, you will say.  Yes, indeed, for a
+hero, or for what he afterwards became.  In other times, and under other
+circumstances, he might have made what is generally termed a great man, a
+patriot, or a conqueror.  As it was, the very qualities which might then
+have pushed him on to fortune and renown were the cause of his ruin.  The
+war over, he fell into evil courses; for his wild heart and ambitious
+spirit could not brook the sober and quiet pursuits of honest industry.
+
+'Can an Arabian steed submit to be a vile drudge?' I cries the fatalist.
+Nonsense!  A man is not an irrational creature, but a reasoning being,
+and has something within him beyond mere brutal instinct.  The greatest
+victory which a man can achieve is over himself, by which is meant those
+unruly passions which are not convenient to the time and place.  David
+did not do this; he gave the reins to his wild heart, instead of curbing
+it, and became a robber, and, alas! alas! he shed blood--under peculiar
+circumstances, it is true, and without _malice prepense_--and for that
+blood he eventually died, and justly; for it was that of the warden of a
+prison from which he was escaping, and whom he slew with one blow of his
+stalwart arm.
+
+Tamerlane and Haggart!  Haggart and Tamerlane!  Both these men were
+robbers, and of low birth, yet one perished on an ignoble scaffold, and
+the other died emperor of the world.  Is this justice?  The ends of the
+two men were widely dissimilar--yet what is the intrinsic difference
+between them?  Very great indeed; the one acted according to his lights
+and his country, not so the other.  Tamerlane was a heathen, and acted
+according to his lights; he was a robber where all around were robbers,
+but he became the avenger of God--God's scourge on unjust kings, on the
+cruel Bajazet, who had plucked out his own brothers' eyes; he became to a
+certain extent the purifier of the East, its regenerator; his equal never
+was before, nor has it since been seen.  Here the wild heart was
+profitably employed, the wild strength, the teeming brain.  Onward, Lame
+one!  Onward, Tamur--lank!  Haggart . . . .
+
+But peace to thee, poor David! why should a mortal worm be sitting in
+judgment over thee?  The Mighty and Just One has already judged thee, and
+perhaps above thou hast received pardon for thy crimes, which could not
+be pardoned here below; and now that thy feverish existence has closed,
+and thy once active form become inanimate dust, thy very memory all but
+forgotten, I will say a few words about thee, a few words soon also to be
+forgotten.  Thou wast the most extraordinary robber that ever lived
+within the belt of Britain; Scotland rang with thy exploits, and England,
+too, north of the Humber; strange deeds also didst thou achieve when,
+fleeing from justice, thou didst find thyself in the Sister Isle; busy
+wast thou there in town and on curragh, at fair and race-course, and also
+in the solitary place.  Ireland thought thee her child, for who spoke her
+brogue better than thyself?--she felt proud of thee, and said, 'Sure,
+O'Hanlon is come again.'  What might not have been thy fate in the far
+west in America, whither thou hadst turned thine eye, saying, 'I will go
+there, and become an honest man!'  But thou wast not to go there,
+David--the blood which thou hadst shed in Scotland was to be required of
+thee; the avenger was at hand, the avenger of blood.  Seized, manacled,
+brought back to thy native land, condemned to die, thou wast left in thy
+narrow cell, and told to make the most of thy time, for it was short: and
+there, in thy narrow cell, and thy time so short, thou didst put the
+crowning stone to thy strange deeds, by that strange history of thyself,
+penned by thy own hand in the robber tongue.  Thou mightest have been
+better employed, David!--but the ruling passion was strong with thee,
+even in the jaws of death.  Thou mightest have been better employed!--but
+peace be with thee, I repeat, and the Almighty's grace and pardon.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX
+
+
+Napoleon--The storm--The cove--Up the country--The trembling
+hand--Irish--Tough battle--Tipperary hills--Elegant lodgings--A
+speech--Fair specimen--Orangemen.
+
+Onward, onward! and after we had sojourned in Scotland nearly two years,
+the long continental war had been brought to an end, Napoleon was humbled
+for a time, and the Bourbons restored to a land which could well have
+dispensed with them; we returned to England, where the corps was
+disbanded, and my parents with their family retired to private life.  I
+shall pass over in silence the events of a year, which offer little of
+interest as far as connected with me and mine.  Suddenly, however, the
+sound of war was heard again, Napoleon had broken forth from Elba, and
+everything was in confusion.  Vast military preparations were again made,
+our own corps was levied anew, and my brother became an officer in it;
+but the danger was soon over, Napoleon was once more quelled, and chained
+for ever, like Prometheus, to his rock.  As the corps, however, though so
+recently levied, had already become a very fine one, thanks to my
+father's energetic drilling, the Government very properly determined to
+turn it to some account, and, as disturbances were apprehended in Ireland
+about this period, it occurred to them that they could do no better than
+despatch it to that country.
+
+In the autumn of the year 1815 we set sail from a port in Essex; we were
+some eight hundred strong, and were embarked in two ships, very large,
+but old and crazy; a storm overtook us when off Beachy Head, in which we
+had nearly foundered.  I was awakened early in the morning by the howling
+of the wind and the uproar on deck.  I kept myself close, however, as is
+still my constant practice on similar occasions, and waited the result
+with that apathy and indifference which violent sea-sickness is sure to
+produce.  We shipped several seas, and once the vessel missing
+stays--which, to do it justice, it generally did at every third or fourth
+tack--we escaped almost by a miracle from being dashed upon the foreland.
+On the eighth day of our voyage we were in sight of Ireland.  The weather
+was now calm and serene, the sun shone brightly on the sea and on certain
+green hills in the distance, on which I descried what at first sight I
+believed to be two ladies gathering flowers, which, however, on our
+nearer approach, proved to be two tall white towers, doubtless built for
+some purpose or other, though I did not learn for what.
+
+We entered a kind of bay, or cove, by a narrow inlet; it was a beautiful
+and romantic place this cove, very spacious, and, being nearly
+land-locked, was sheltered from every wind.  A small island, every inch
+of which was covered with fortifications, appeared to swim upon the
+waters, whose dark blue denoted their immense depth; tall green hills,
+which ascended gradually from the shore, formed the background to the
+west; they were carpeted to the top with turf of the most vivid green,
+and studded here and there with woods, seemingly of oak; there was a
+strange old castle half-way up the ascent, a village on a crag--but the
+mists of morning were half veiling the scene when I surveyed it, and the
+mists of time are now hanging densely between it and my no longer
+youthful eye; I may not describe it;--nor will I try.
+
+Leaving the ship in the cove, we passed up a wide river in boats till we
+came to a city, where we disembarked.  It was a large city, as large as
+Edinburgh to my eyes; there were plenty of fine houses, but little
+neatness; the streets were full of impurities; handsome equipages rolled
+along, but the greater part of the population were in rags; beggars
+abounded; there was no lack of merriment, however; boisterous shouts of
+laughter were heard on every side.  It appeared a city of contradictions.
+After a few days' rest we marched from this place in two divisions.  My
+father commanded the second, I walked by his side.
+
+Our route lay up the country; the country at first offered no very
+remarkable feature, it was pretty, but tame.  On the second day, however,
+its appearance had altered, it had become more wild; a range of distant
+mountains bounded the horizon.  We passed through several villages, as I
+suppose I may term them, of low huts, the walls formed of rough stones
+without mortar, the roof of flags laid over wattles and wicker-work; they
+seemed to be inhabited solely by women and children; the latter were
+naked, the former, in general, blear-eyed beldames, who sat beside the
+doors on low stools, spinning.  We saw, however, both men and women
+working at a distance in the fields.
+
+I was thirsty; and going up to an ancient crone, employed in the manner
+which I have described, I asked her for water; she looked me in the face,
+appeared to consider a moment, then tottering into her hut, presently
+reappeared with a small pipkin of milk, which she offered to me with a
+trembling hand.  I drank the milk; it was sour, but I found it highly
+refreshing.  I then took out a penny and offered it to her, whereupon she
+shook her head, smiled, and, patting my face with her skinny hand,
+murmured some words in a tongue which I had never heard before.
+
+I walked on by my father's side, holding the stirrup-leather of his
+horse; presently several low uncouth cars passed by, drawn by starved
+cattle: the drivers were tall fellows, with dark features and athletic
+frames--they wore long loose blue cloaks with sleeves, which last,
+however, dangled unoccupied: these cloaks appeared in tolerably good
+condition, not so their under garments.  On their heads were broad
+slouching hats: the generality of them were bare-footed.  As they passed,
+the soldiers jested with them in the patois of East Anglia, whereupon the
+fellows laughed, and appeared to jest with the soldiers; but what they
+said who knows, it being in a rough guttural language, strange and wild.
+The soldiers stared at each other, and were silent.
+
+'A strange language that!' said a young officer to my father, 'I don't
+understand a word of it; what can it be?'
+
+'Irish!' said my father, with a loud voice, 'and a bad language it is, I
+have known it of old, that is, I have often heard it spoken when I was a
+guardsman in London.  There's one part of London where all the Irish
+live--at least all the worst of them--and there they hatch their
+villainies and speak this tongue; it is that which keeps them together
+and makes them dangerous: I was once sent there to seize a couple of
+deserters--Irish--who had taken refuge amongst their companions; we found
+them in what was in my time called a ken, that is a house where only
+thieves and desperadoes are to be found.  Knowing on what kind of
+business I was bound, I had taken with me a sergeant's party; it was well
+I did so.  We found the deserters in a large room, with at least thirty
+ruffians, horrid-looking fellows, seated about a long table, drinking,
+swearing, and talking Irish.  Ah! we had a tough battle, I remember; the
+two fellows did nothing, but sat still, thinking it best to be quiet; but
+the rest, with an ubbubboo like the blowing up of a powder-magazine,
+sprang up, brandishing their sticks; for these fellows always carry
+sticks with them even to bed, and not unfrequently spring up in their
+sleep, striking left and right.'
+
+'And did you take the deserters?' said the officer.
+
+'Yes,' said my father; 'for we formed at the end of the room, and charged
+with fixed bayonets, which compelled the others to yield notwithstanding
+their numbers; but the worst was when we got out into the street; the
+whole district had become alarmed, and hundreds came pouring down upon
+us--men, women, and children.  Women, did I say!--they looked fiends,
+half naked, with their hair hanging down over their bosoms; they tore up
+the very pavement to hurl at us, sticks rang about our ears, stones, and
+Irish--I liked the Irish worst of all, it sounded so horrid, especially
+as I did not understand it.  It's a bad language.'
+
+'A queer tongue,' said I; 'I wonder if I could learn it.'
+
+'Learn it!' said my father; 'what should you learn it for?--however, I am
+not afraid of that.  It is not like Scotch, no person can learn it, save
+those who are born to it, and even in Ireland the respectable people do
+not speak it, only the wilder sort, like those we have passed.'
+
+Within a day or two we had reached a tall range of mountains running
+north and south, which I was told were those of Tipperary; along the
+skirts of these we proceeded till we came to a town, the principal one of
+these regions.  It was on the bank of a beautiful river, which separated
+it from the mountains.  It was rather an ancient place, and might contain
+some ten thousand inhabitants--I found that it was our destination; there
+were extensive barracks at the farther end, in which the corps took up
+its quarters; with respect to ourselves, we took lodgings in a house
+which stood in the principal street.
+
+'You never saw more elegant lodgings than these, captain,' said the
+master of the house, a tall, handsome, and athletic man, who came up
+whilst our little family were seated at dinner late in the afternoon of
+the day of our arrival; 'they beat anything in this town of Clonmel.  I
+do not let them for the sake of interest, and to none but gentlemen in
+the army, in order that myself and my wife, who is from Londonderry, may
+have the advantage of pleasant company, genteel company; ay, and
+Protestant company, captain.  It did my heart good when I saw your honour
+ride in at the head of all those fine fellows, real Protestants, I'll
+engage, not a Papist among them, they are too good-looking and honest-
+looking for that.  So I no sooner saw your honour at the head of your
+army, with that handsome young gentleman holding by your stirrup, than I
+said to my wife, Mistress Hyne, who is from Londonderry, "God bless me,"
+said I, "what a truly Protestant countenance, what a noble bearing, and
+what a sweet young gentleman.  By the silver hairs of his honour"--and
+sure enough I never saw hairs more regally silver than those of your
+honour--"by his honour's gray silver hairs, and by my own soul, which is
+not worthy to be mentioned in the same day with one of them--it would be
+no more than decent and civil to run out and welcome such a father and
+son coming in at the head of such a Protestant military."  And then my
+wife, who is from Londonderry, Mistress Hyne, looking me in the face like
+a fairy as she is, "You may say that," says she.  "It would be but decent
+and civil, honey."  And your honour knows how I ran out of my own door
+and welcomed your honour riding in company with your son, who was
+walking; how I welcomed ye both at the head of your royal regiment, and
+how I shook your honour by the hand, saying, I am glad to see your
+honour, and your honour's son, and your honour's royal military
+Protestant regiment.  And now I have you in the house, and right proud I
+am to have ye one and all; one, two, three, four, true Protestants every
+one, no Papists here; and I have made bold to bring up a bottle of claret
+which is now waiting behind the door; and, when your honour and your
+family have dined, I will make bold too to bring up Mistress Hyne, from
+Londonderry, to introduce to your honour's lady, and then we'll drink to
+the health of King George, God bless him; to the "glorious and
+immortal"--to Boyne water--to your honour's speedy promotion to be Lord
+Lieutenant, and to the speedy downfall of the Pope and Saint Anthony of
+Padua.'
+
+Such was the speech of the Irish Protestant addressed to my father in the
+long lofty dining-room with three windows, looking upon the high street
+of the good town of Clonmel, as he sat at meat with his family, after
+saying grace like a true-hearted respectable soldier as he was.
+
+'A bigot and an Orangeman!'  Oh yes!  It is easier to apply epithets of
+opprobrium to people than to make yourself acquainted with their history
+and position.  He was a specimen, and a fair specimen, of a most
+remarkable body of men, who during two centuries have fought a good fight
+in Ireland in the cause of civilisation and religious truth; they were
+sent as colonists, few in number, into a barbarous and unhappy country,
+where ever since, though surrounded with difficulties of every kind, they
+have maintained their ground; theirs has been no easy life, nor have
+their lines fallen upon very pleasant places; amidst darkness they have
+held up a lamp, and it would be well for Ireland were all her children
+like these her adopted ones.  'But they are fierce and sanguinary,' it is
+said.  Ay, ay! they have not unfrequently opposed the keen sword to the
+savage pike.  'But they are bigoted and narrow-minded.'  Ay, ay! they do
+not like idolatry, and will not bow the knee before a stone!  'But their
+language is frequently indecorous.'  Go to, my dainty one, did ye ever
+listen to the voice of Papist cursing?
+
+The Irish Protestants have faults, numerous ones; but the greater number
+of these may be traced to the peculiar circumstances of their position:
+but they have virtues, numerous ones; and their virtues are their own,
+their industry, their energy, and their undaunted resolution are their
+own.  They have been vilified and traduced--but what would Ireland be
+without them?  I repeat, that it would be well for her were all her sons
+no worse than these much-calumniated children of her adoption.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X
+
+
+Protestant young gentlemen--The Greek letters--Open chimney--Murtagh--Paris
+and Salamanca--Nothing to do--To whit, to whoo!--The pack of cards--Before
+Christmas.
+
+We continued at this place for some months, during which time the
+soldiers performed their duties, whatever they were; and I, having no
+duties to perform, was sent to school.  I had been to English schools,
+and to the celebrated one of Edinburgh; but my education, at the present
+day, would not be what it is--perfect, had I never had the honour of
+being _alumnus_ in an Irish seminary.
+
+'Captain,' said our kind host, 'you would, no doubt, wish that the young
+gentleman should enjoy every advantage which the town may afford towards
+helping him on in the path of genteel learning.  It's a great pity that
+he should waste his time in idleness--doing nothing else than what he
+says he has been doing for the last fortnight--fishing in the river for
+trouts which he never catches; and wandering up the glen in the mountain,
+in search of the hips that grow there.  Now, we have a school here, where
+he can learn the most elegant Latin, and get an insight into the Greek
+letters, which is desirable; and where, moreover, he will have an
+opportunity of making acquaintance with all the Protestant young
+gentlemen of the place, the handsome well-dressed young persons whom your
+honour sees in the church on the Sundays, when your honour goes there in
+the morning, with the rest of the Protestant military; for it is no
+Papist school, though there may be a Papist or two there--a few poor
+farmers' sons from the country, with whom there is no necessity for your
+honour's child to form any acquaintance at all, at all!'
+
+And to the school I went, where I read the Latin tongue and the Greek
+letters, with a nice old clergyman, who sat behind a black oaken desk,
+with a huge Elzevir Flaccus before him, in a long gloomy kind of hall,
+with a broken stone floor, the roof festooned with cobwebs, the walls
+considerably dilapidated, and covered over with strange figures and
+hieroglyphics, evidently produced by the application of burnt stick; and
+there I made acquaintance with the Protestant young gentlemen of the
+place, who, with whatever _eclat_ they might appear at church on a
+Sunday, did assuredly not exhibit to much advantage in the schoolroom on
+the week days, either with respect to clothes or looks.  And there I was
+in the habit of sitting on a large stone, before the roaring fire in the
+huge open chimney, and entertaining certain of the Protestant young
+gentlemen of my own age, seated on similar stones, with extraordinary
+accounts of my own adventures, and those of the corps, with an occasional
+anecdote extracted from the story-books of Hickathrift and Wight Wallace,
+pretending to be conning the lesson all the while.
+
+And there I made acquaintance, notwithstanding the hint of the landlord,
+with the Papist 'gossoons,' as they were called, the farmers' sons from
+the country; and of these gossoons, of whom there were three, two might
+be reckoned as nothing at all; in the third, however, I soon discovered
+that there was something extraordinary.
+
+He was about sixteen years old, and above six feet high, dressed in a
+gray suit; the coat, from its size, appeared to have been made for him
+some ten years before.  He was remarkably narrow-chested and
+round-shouldered, owing, perhaps as much to the tightness of his garment
+as to the hand of nature.  His face was long, and his complexion swarthy,
+relieved, however, by certain freckles, with which the skin was
+plentifully studded.  He had strange wandering eyes, gray, and somewhat
+unequal in size; they seldom rested on the book, but were generally
+wandering about the room, from one object to another.  Sometimes he would
+fix them intently on the wall, and then suddenly starting, as if from a
+reverie, he would commence making certain mysterious movements with his
+thumbs and forefingers, as if he were shuffling something from him.
+
+One morning, as he sat by himself on a bench, engaged in this manner, I
+went up to him, and said, 'Good-day, Murtagh; you do not seem to have
+much to do?'
+
+'Faith, you may say that, Shorsha dear!--it is seldom much to do that I
+have.'
+
+'And what are you doing with your hands?'
+
+'Faith, then, if I must tell you, I was e'en dealing with the cards.'
+
+'Do you play much at cards?'
+
+'Sorra a game, Shorsha, have I played with the cards since my uncle
+Phelim, the thief, stole away the ould pack, when he went to settle in
+the county Waterford!'
+
+'But you have other things to do?'
+
+'Sorra anything else has Murtagh to do that he cares about and that makes
+me dread so going home at nights.'
+
+'I should like to know all about you; where do you live, joy?'
+
+'Faith, then, ye shall know all about me, and where I live.  It is at a
+place called the Wilderness that I live, and they call it so, because it
+is a fearful wild place, without any house near it but my father's own;
+and that's where I live when at home.'
+
+'And your father is a farmer, I suppose?'
+
+'You may say that; and it is a farmer I should have been, like my brother
+Denis, had not my uncle Phelim, the thief, tould my father to send me to
+school, to learn Greek letters, that I might be made a saggart of, and
+sent to Paris and Salamanca.'
+
+'And you would rather be a farmer than a priest?'
+
+'You may say that!--for, were I a farmer, like the rest, I should have
+something to do, like the rest--something that I cared for--and I should
+come home tired at night, and fall asleep, as the rest do, before the
+fire; but when I comes home at night I am not tired, for I have been
+doing nothing all day that I care for; and then I sits down and stares
+about me, and at the fire, till I become frighted; and then I shouts to
+my brother Denis, or to the gossoons, "Get up, I say, and let's be doing
+something; tell us the tale of Finn-ma-Coul, and how he lay down in the
+Shannon's bed, and let the river flow down his jaws!"  Arrah, Shorsha!  I
+wish you would come and stay with us, and tell us some o' your sweet
+stories of your own self and the snake ye carried about wid ye.  Faith,
+Shorsha dear! that snake bates anything about Finn-ma-Coul or Brian
+Boroo, the thieves two, bad luck to them!'
+
+'And do they get up and tell you stories?'
+
+'Sometimes they does, but oftenmost they curses me, and bids me be quiet!
+But I can't be quiet, either before the fire or abed; so I runs out of
+the house, and stares at the rocks, at the trees, and sometimes at the
+clouds, as they run a race across the bright moon; and, the more I
+stares, the more frighted I grows, till I screeches and holloas.  And
+last night I went into the barn, and hid my face in the straw; and there,
+as I lay and shivered in the straw, I heard a voice above my head singing
+out "To whit, to whoo!" and then up I starts, and runs into the house,
+and falls over my brother Denis, as he lies at the fire.  "What's that
+for?" says he.  "Get up, you thief!" says I, "and be helping me.  I have
+been out into the barn, and an owl has crow'd at me!"'
+
+'And what has this to do with playing cards?'
+
+'Little enough, Shorsha dear!--If there were card-playing, I should not
+be frighted.'
+
+'And why do you not play at cards?'
+
+'Did I not tell you that the thief, my uncle Phelim, stole away the pack?
+If we had the pack, my brother Denis and the gossoons would be ready
+enough to get up from their sleep before the fire, and play cards with me
+for ha'pence, or eggs, or nothing at all; but the pack is gone--bad luck
+to the thief who took it!'
+
+'And why don't you buy another?'
+
+'Is it of buying you are speaking?  And where am I to get the money?'
+
+'Ah! that's another thing!'
+
+'Faith it is, honey!--And now the Christmas holidays is coming, when I
+shall be at home by day as well as night, and then what am I to do?  Since
+I have been a saggarting, I have been good for nothing at all--neither
+for work nor Greek--only to play cards!  Faith, it's going mad I will
+be!'
+
+'I say, Murtagh!'
+
+'Yes, Shorsha dear!'
+
+'I have a pack of cards.'
+
+'You don't say so, Shorsha ma vourneen?--you don't say that you have
+cards fifty-two?'
+
+'I do, though; and they are quite new--never been once used.'
+
+'And you'll be lending them to me, I warrant?'
+
+'Don't think it!--But I'll sell them to you, joy, if you like.'
+
+'Hanam mon Dioul! am I not after telling you that I have no money at
+all!'
+
+'But you have as good as money, to me, at least; and I'll take it in
+exchange.'
+
+'What's that, Shorsha dear?'
+
+'Irish!'
+
+'Irish?'
+
+'Yes, you speak Irish; I heard you talking it the other day to the
+cripple.  You shall teach me Irish.'
+
+'And is it a language-master you'd be making of me?'
+
+'To be sure!--what better can you do?--it would help you to pass your
+time at school.  You can't learn Greek, so you must teach Irish!'
+
+Before Christmas, Murtagh was playing at cards with his brother Denis,
+and I could speak a considerable quantity of broken Irish.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI
+
+
+Templemore--Devil's Mountain--No companion--Force of circumstance--Way of
+the world--Ruined castle--Grim and desolate--The donjon--Old woman--My
+own house.
+
+When Christmas was over, and the new year commenced, we broke up our
+quarters, and marched away to Templemore.  This was a large military
+station, situated in a wild and thinly inhabited country.  Extensive bogs
+were in the neighbourhood, connected with the huge bog of Allen, the
+Palus Maeotis of Ireland.  Here and there was seen a ruined castle
+looming through the mists of winter; whilst, at the distance of seven
+miles, rose a singular mountain, exhibiting in its brow a chasm, or
+vacuum, just, for all the world, as if a piece had been bitten out; a
+feat which, according to the tradition of the country, had actually been
+performed by his Satanic majesty, who, after flying for some leagues with
+the morsel in his mouth, becoming weary, dropped it in the vicinity of
+Cashel, where it may now be seen in the shape of a bold bluff hill,
+crowned with the ruins of a stately edifice, probably built by some
+ancient Irish king.
+
+We had been here only a few days, when my brother, who, as I have before
+observed, had become one of his Majesty's officers, was sent on
+detachment to a village at about ten miles' distance.  He was not
+sixteen, and, though three years older than myself, scarcely my equal in
+stature, for I had become tall and large-limbed for my age; but there was
+a spirit in him which would not have disgraced a general; and, nothing
+daunted at the considerable responsibility which he was about to incur,
+he marched sturdily out of the barrack-yard at the head of his party,
+consisting of twenty light-infantry men, and a tall grenadier sergeant,
+selected expressly by my father, for the soldier-like qualities which he
+possessed, to accompany his son on this his first expedition.  So out of
+the barrack-yard, with something of an air, marched my dear brother, his
+single drum and fife playing the inspiring old melody,
+
+   Marlbrouk is gone to the wars,
+   He'll never return no more!
+
+I soon missed my brother, for I was now alone, with no being, at all
+assimilating in age, with whom I could exchange a word.  Of late years,
+from being almost constantly at school, I had cast aside, in a great
+degree, my unsocial habits and natural reserve, but in the desolate
+region in which we now were there was no school; and I felt doubly the
+loss of my brother, whom, moreover, I tenderly loved for his own sake.
+Books I had none, at least such 'as I cared about'; and with respect to
+the old volume, the wonders of which had first beguiled me into common
+reading, I had so frequently pored over its pages, that I had almost got
+its contents by heart.  I was therefore in danger of falling into the
+same predicament as Murtagh, becoming 'frighted' from having nothing to
+do!  Nay, I had not even his resources; I cared not for cards, even if I
+possessed them and could find people disposed to play with them.  However,
+I made the most of circumstances, and roamed about the desolate fields
+and bogs in the neighbourhood, sometimes entering the cabins of the
+peasantry, with a 'God's blessing upon you, good people!' where I would
+take my seat on the 'stranger's stone' at the corner of the hearth, and,
+looking them full in the face, would listen to the carles and carlines
+talking Irish.
+
+Ah, that Irish!  How frequently do circumstances, at first sight the most
+trivial and unimportant, exercise a mighty and permanent influence on our
+habits and pursuits!--how frequently is a stream turned aside from its
+natural course by some little rock or knoll, causing it to make an abrupt
+turn!  On a wild road in Ireland I had heard Irish spoken for the first
+time; and I was seized with a desire to learn Irish, the acquisition of
+which, in my case, became the stepping-stone to other languages.  I had
+previously learnt Latin, or rather Lilly; but neither Latin nor Lilly
+made me a philologist.  I had frequently heard French and other
+languages, but had felt little desire to become acquainted with them; and
+what, it may be asked, was there connected with the Irish calculated to
+recommend it to my attention?
+
+First of all, and principally, I believe, the strangeness and singularity
+of its tones; then there was something mysterious and uncommon associated
+with its use.  It was not a school language, to acquire which was
+considered an imperative duty; no, no; nor was it a drawing-room
+language, drawled out occasionally, in shreds and patches, by the ladies
+of generals and other great dignitaries, to the ineffable dismay of poor
+officers' wives.  Nothing of the kind; but a speech spoken in out-of-the-
+way desolate places, and in cut-throat kens, where thirty ruffians, at
+the sight of the king's minions, would spring up with brandished sticks
+and an 'ubbubboo like the blowing up of a powder-magazine.'  Such were
+the points connected with the Irish, which first awakened in my mind the
+desire of acquiring it; and by acquiring it I became, as I have already
+said, enamoured of languages.  Having learnt one by choice, I speedily,
+as the reader will perceive, learnt others, some of which were widely
+different from Irish.
+
+Ah, that Irish!  I am much indebted to it in more ways than one.  But I
+am afraid I have followed the way of the world, which is very much wont
+to neglect original friends and benefactors.  I frequently find myself,
+at present, turning up my nose at Irish when I hear it in the street; yet
+I have still a kind of regard for it, the fine old language:
+
+   A labhair Padruic n'insefail nan riogh.
+
+One of the most peculiar features of this part of Ireland is the ruined
+castles, which are so thick and numerous that the face of the country
+appears studded with them, it being difficult to choose any situation
+from which one, at least, may not be descried.  They are of various ages
+and styles of architecture, some of great antiquity, like the stately
+remains which crown the Crag of Cashel; others built by the early English
+conquerors; others, and probably the greater part, erections of the times
+of Elizabeth and Cromwell.  The whole speaking monuments of the troubled
+and insecure state of the country, from the most remote periods to a
+comparatively modern time.
+
+From the windows of the room where I slept I had a view of one of these
+old places--an indistinct one, it is true, the distance being too great
+to permit me to distinguish more than the general outline.  I had an
+anxious desire to explore it.  It stood to the south-east; in which
+direction, however, a black bog intervened, which had more than once
+baffled all my attempts to cross it.  One morning, however, when the sun
+shone brightly upon the old building, it appeared so near, that I felt
+ashamed at not being able to accomplish a feat seemingly so easy; I
+determined, therefore, upon another trial.  I reached the bog, and was
+about to venture upon its black surface, and to pick my way amongst its
+innumerable holes, yawning horribly, and half filled with water black as
+soot, when it suddenly occurred to me that there was a road to the south,
+by following which I might find a more convenient route to the object of
+my wishes.  The event justified my expectations, for, after following the
+road for some three miles, seemingly in the direction of the Devil's
+Mountain, I suddenly beheld the castle on my left.
+
+I diverged from the road, and, crossing two or three fields, came to a
+small grassy plain, in the midst of which stood the castle.  About a gun-
+shot to the south was a small village, which had, probably, in ancient
+days, sprung up beneath its protection.  A kind of awe came over me as I
+approached the old building.  The sun no longer shone upon it, and it
+looked so grim, so desolate and solitary; and here was I, in that wild
+country, alone with that grim building before me.  The village was within
+sight, it is true; but it might be a village of the dead for what I knew;
+no sound issued from it, no smoke was rising from its roofs, neither man
+nor beast was visible, no life, no motion--it looked as desolate as the
+castle itself.  Yet I was bent on the adventure, and moved on towards the
+castle across the green plain, occasionally casting a startled glance
+around me; and now I was close to it.
+
+It was surrounded by a quadrangular wall, about ten feet in height, with
+a square tower at each corner.  At first I could discover no entrance;
+walking round, however, to the northern side, I found a wide and lofty
+gateway with a tower above it, similar to those at the angles of the
+wall; on this side the ground sloped gently down towards the bog, which
+was here skirted by an abundant growth of copse-wood and a few evergreen
+oaks.  I passed through the gateway, and found myself within a square
+inclosure of about two acres.  On one side rose a round and lofty keep,
+or donjon, with a conical roof, part of which had fallen down, strewing
+the square with its ruins.  Close to the keep, on the other side, stood
+the remains of an oblong house, built something in the modern style, with
+various window-holes; nothing remained but the bare walls and a few
+projecting stumps of beams, which seemed to have been half burnt.  The
+interior of the walls was blackened, as if by fire; fire also appeared at
+one time to have raged out of the window-holes, for the outside about
+them was black, portentously so.  'I wonder what has been going on here?'
+I exclaimed.
+
+There were echoes among the walls as I walked about the court.  I entered
+the keep by a low and frowning doorway: the lower floor consisted of a
+large dungeon-like room, with a vaulted roof; on the left hand was a
+winding staircase in the thickness of the wall; it looked anything but
+inviting; yet I stole softly up, my heart beating.  On the top of the
+first flight of stairs was an arched doorway, to the left was a dark
+passage, to the right, stairs leading still higher.  I stepped under the
+arch and found myself in an apartment somewhat similar to the one below,
+but higher.  There was an object at the farther end.
+
+An old woman, at least eighty, was seated on a stone, cowering over a few
+sticks burning feebly on what had once been a right noble and cheerful
+hearth; her side-glance was towards the doorway as I entered, for she had
+heard my foot-steps.  I stood suddenly still, and her haggard glance
+rested on my face.
+
+'Is this your house, mother?' I at length demanded, in the language which
+I thought she would best understand.
+
+'Yes, my house, my own house; the house of the broken-hearted.'
+
+'Any other person's house?' I demanded.
+
+'My own house, the beggar's house--the accursed house of Cromwell!'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII
+
+
+A visit--Figure of a man--The dog of peace--The raw wound--The
+guardroom--Boy soldier--Person in authority--Never solitary--Clergyman
+and family--Still-hunting--Fairy man--Near sunset--Bagg--Left-handed
+hitter--Irish and supernatural--At Swanton Morley.
+
+One morning I set out, designing to pay a visit to my brother at the
+place where he was detached; the distance was rather considerable, yet I
+hoped to be back by evening fall, for I was now a shrewd walker, thanks
+to constant practice.  I set out early, and, directing my course towards
+the north, I had in less than two hours accomplished considerably more
+than half of the journey.  The weather had at first been propitious: a
+slight frost had rendered the ground firm to the tread, and the skies
+were clear; but now a change came over the scene, the skies darkened, and
+a heavy snowstorm came on; the road then lay straight through a bog, and
+was bounded by a deep trench on both sides; I was making the best of my
+way, keeping as nearly as I could in the middle of the road, lest,
+blinded by the snow which was frequently borne into my eyes by the wind,
+I might fall into the dyke, when all at once I heard a shout to windward,
+and turning my eyes I saw the figure of a man, and what appeared to be an
+animal of some kind, coming across the bog with great speed, in the
+direction of myself; the nature of the ground seemed to offer but little
+impediment to these beings, both clearing the holes and abysses which lay
+in their way with surprising agility; the animal was, however, some
+slight way in advance, and, bounding over the dyke, appeared on the road
+just before me.  It was a dog, of what species I cannot tell, never
+having seen the like before or since; the head was large and round; the
+ears so tiny as scarcely to be discernible; the eyes of a fiery red: in
+size it was rather small than large; and the coat, which was remarkably
+smooth, as white as the falling flakes.  It placed itself directly in my
+path, and showing its teeth, and bristling its coat, appeared determined
+to prevent my progress.  I had an ashen stick in my hand, with which I
+threatened it; this, however, only served to increase its fury; it rushed
+upon me, and I had the utmost difficulty to preserve myself from its
+fangs.
+
+'What are you doing with the dog, the fairy dog?' said a man, who at this
+time likewise cleared the dyke at a bound.
+
+He was a very tall man, rather well dressed as it should seem; his
+garments, however, were, like my own, so covered with snow that I could
+scarcely discern their quality.
+
+'What are ye doing with the dog of peace?'
+
+'I wish he would show himself one,' said I; 'I said nothing to him, but
+he placed himself in my road, and would not let me pass.'
+
+'Of course he would not be letting you till he knew where ye were going.'
+
+'He's not much of a fairy,' said I, 'or he would know that without
+asking; tell him that I am going to see my brother.'
+
+'And who is your brother, little Sas?'
+
+'What my father is, a royal soldier.'
+
+'Oh, ye are going then to the detachment at--; by my shoul, I have a good
+mind to be spoiling your journey.'
+
+'You are doing that already,' said I, 'keeping me here talking about dogs
+and fairies; you had better go home and get some salve to cure that place
+over your eye; it's catching cold you'll be, in so much snow.'
+
+On one side of the man's forehead there was a raw and staring wound, as
+if from a recent and terrible blow.
+
+'Faith, then I'll be going, but it's taking you wid me I will be.'
+
+'And where will you take me?'
+
+'Why, then, to Ryan's Castle, little Sas.'
+
+'You do not speak the language very correctly,' said I; 'it is not Sas
+you should call me--'tis Sassannach,' and forthwith I accompanied the
+word with a speech full of flowers of Irish rhetoric.
+
+The man looked upon me for a moment, fixedly, then, bending his head
+towards his breast, he appeared to be undergoing a kind of convulsion,
+which was accompanied by a sound something resembling laughter; presently
+he looked at me, and there was a broad grin on his features.
+
+'By my shoul, it's a thing of peace I'm thinking ye.'
+
+But now with a whisking sound came running down the road a hare; it was
+nearly upon us before it perceived us; suddenly stopping short, however,
+it sprang into the bog on the right-hand side; after it amain bounded the
+dog of peace, followed by the man, but not until he had nodded to me a
+farewell salutation.  In a few moments I lost sight of him amidst the
+snowflakes.
+
+The weather was again clear and fine before I reached the place of
+detachment.  It was a little wooden barrack, surrounded by a wall of the
+same material; a sentinel stood at the gate, I passed by him, and,
+entering the building, found myself in a rude kind of guardroom; several
+soldiers were lying asleep on a wooden couch at one end, others lounged
+on benches by the side of a turf fire.  The tall sergeant stood before
+the fire, holding a cooking utensil in his left hand; on seeing me, he
+made the military salutation.
+
+'Is my brother here?' said I, rather timidly, dreading to hear that he
+was out, perhaps for the day.
+
+'The ensign is in his room, sir,' said Bagg, 'I am now preparing his
+meal, which will presently be ready; you will find the ensign above
+stairs,' and he pointed to a broken ladder which led to some place above.
+
+And there I found him--the boy soldier--in a kind of upper loft, so low
+that I could touch with my hands the sooty rafters; the floor was of
+rough boards, through the joints of which you could see the gleam of the
+soldiers' fire, and occasionally discern their figures as they moved
+about; in one corner was a camp bedstead, by the side of which hung the
+child's sword, gorget, and sash; a deal table stood in the proximity of
+the rusty grate, where smoked and smouldered a pile of black turf from
+the bog,--a deal table without a piece of baize to cover it, yet fraught
+with things not devoid of interest: a Bible, given by a mother; the
+_Odyssey_, the Greek _Odyssey_; a flute, with broad silver keys; crayons,
+moreover, and water-colours; and a sketch of a wild prospect near, which,
+though but half finished, afforded ample proof of the excellence and
+skill of the boyish hand now occupied upon it.
+
+Ah! he was a sweet being, that boy soldier, a plant of early promise,
+bidding fair to become in after time all that is great, good, and
+admirable.  I have read of a remarkable Welshman, of whom it was said,
+when the grave closed over him, that he could frame a harp, and play it;
+build a ship, and sail it; compose an ode, and set it to music.  A brave
+fellow that son of Wales--but I had once a brother who could do more and
+better than this, but the grave has closed over him, as over the gallant
+Welshman of yore; there are now but two that remember him--the one who
+bore him, and the being who was nurtured at the same breast.  He was
+taken, and I was left!--Truly, the ways of Providence are inscrutable.
+
+'You seem to be very comfortable, John,' said I, looking around the room
+and at the various objects which I have described above: 'you have a good
+roof over your head, and have all your things about you.'
+
+'Yes, I am very comfortable, George, in many respects; I am, moreover,
+independent, and feel myself a man for the first time in my
+life--independent did I say?--that's not the word, I am something much
+higher than that; here am I, not sixteen yet, a person in authority, like
+the centurion in the book there, with twenty Englishmen under me, worth a
+whole legion of his men, and that fine fellow Bagg to wait upon me, and
+take my orders.  Oh! these last six weeks have passed like hours of
+heaven.'
+
+'But your time must frequently hang heavy on your hands; this is a
+strange wild place, and you must be very solitary?'
+
+'I am never solitary; I have, as you see, all my things about me, and
+there is plenty of company below stairs.  Not that I mix with the
+soldiers; if I did, good-bye to my authority; but when I am alone I can
+hear all their discourse through the planks, and I often laugh to myself
+at the funny things they say.'
+
+'And have you any acquaintance here?'
+
+'The very best; much better than the Colonel and the rest, at their grand
+Templemore; I had never so many in my whole life before.  One has just
+left me, a gentleman who lives at a distance across the bog; he comes to
+talk with me about Greek, and the _Odyssey_, for he is a very learned
+man, and understands the old Irish, and various other strange languages.
+He has had a dispute with Bagg.  On hearing his name, he called him to
+him, and, after looking at him for some time with great curiosity, said
+that he was sure he was a Dane.  Bagg, however, took the compliment in
+dudgeon, and said that he was no more a Dane than himself, but a true-
+born Englishman, and a sergeant of six years' standing.'
+
+'And what other acquaintance have you?'
+
+'All kinds; the whole neighbourhood can't make enough of me.  Amongst
+others there's the clergyman of the parish and his family; such a
+venerable old man, such fine sons and daughters!  I am treated by them
+like a son and a brother--I might be always with them if I pleased;
+there's one drawback, however, in going to see them; there's a horrible
+creature in the house, a kind of tutor, whom they keep more from charity
+than anything else; he is a Papist and, they say, a priest; you should
+see him scowl sometimes at my red coat, for he hates the king, and not
+unfrequently, when the king's health is drunk, curses him between his
+teeth.  I once got up to strike him; but the youngest of the sisters, who
+is the handsomest, caught my arm and pointed to her forehead.'
+
+'And what does your duty consist of?  Have you nothing else to do than
+pay visits and receive them?'
+
+'We do what is required of us, we guard this edifice, perform our
+evolutions, and help the excise; I am frequently called up in the dead of
+night to go to some wild place or other in quest of an illicit still;
+this last part of our duty is poor mean work, I don't like it, nor more
+does Bagg; though without it we should not see much active service, for
+the neighbourhood is quiet; save the poor creatures with their stills,
+not a soul is stirring.  'Tis true there's Jerry Grant.'
+
+'And who is Jerry Grant?'
+
+'Did you never hear of him? that's strange, the whole country is talking
+about him; he is a kind of outlaw, rebel, or robber, all three I daresay;
+there's a hundred pounds offered for his head.'
+
+'And where does he live?'
+
+'His proper home, they say, is in the Queen's County, where he has a
+band, but he is a strange fellow, fond of wandering about by himself
+amidst the bogs and mountains, and living in the old castles;
+occasionally he quarters himself in the peasants' houses, who let him do
+just what he pleases; he is free of his money, and often does them good
+turns, and can be good-humoured enough, so they don't dislike him.  Then
+he is what they call a fairy man, a person in league with fairies and
+spirits, and able to work much harm by supernatural means, on which
+account they hold him in great awe; he is, moreover, a mighty strong and
+tall fellow.  Bagg has seen him.'
+
+'Has he?'
+
+'Yes! and felt him; he too is a strange one.  A few days ago he was told
+that Grant had been seen hovering about an old castle some two miles off
+in the bog; so one afternoon what does he do but, without saying a word
+to me--for which, by the bye, I ought to put him under arrest, though
+what I should do without Bagg I have no idea whatever--what does he do
+but walk off to the castle, intending, as I suppose, to pay a visit to
+Jerry.  He had some difficulty in getting there on account of the turf-
+holes in the bog, which he was not accustomed to; however, thither at
+last he got and went in.  It was a strange lonesome place, he says, and
+he did not much like the look of it; however, in he went, and searched
+about from the bottom to the top and down again, but could find no one;
+he shouted and hallooed, but nobody answered, save the rooks and choughs,
+which started up in great numbers.  "I have lost my trouble," said Bagg,
+and left the castle.  It was now late in the afternoon, near sunset, when
+about half-way over the bog he met a man--'
+
+'And that man was--'
+
+'Jerry Grant! there's no doubt of it.  Bagg says it was the most sudden
+thing in the world.  He was moving along, making the best of his way,
+thinking of nothing at all save a public-house at Swanton Morley, which
+he intends to take when he gets home, and the regiment is
+disbanded--though I hope that will not be for some time yet: he had just
+leaped a turf-hole, and was moving on, when, at the distance of about six
+yards before him, he saw a fellow coming straight towards him.  Bagg says
+that he stopped short, as suddenly as if he had heard the word halt, when
+marching at double quick time.  It was quite a surprise, he says, and he
+can't imagine how the fellow was so close upon him before he was aware.
+He was an immense tall fellow--Bagg thinks at least two inches taller
+than himself--very well dressed in a blue coat and buff breeches, for all
+the world like a squire when going out hunting.  Bagg, however, saw at
+once that he had a roguish air, and he was on his guard in a moment.
+"Good-evening to ye, sodger," says the fellow, stepping close up to Bagg,
+and staring him in the face.  "Good-evening to you, sir!  I hope you are
+well," says Bagg.  "You are looking after some one?" says the fellow.
+"Just so, sir," says Bagg, and forthwith seized him by the collar; the
+man laughed, Bagg says it was such a strange awkward laugh.  "Do you know
+whom you have got hold of, sodger?" said he.  "I believe I do, sir," said
+Bagg, "and in that belief will hold you fast in the name of King George
+and the quarter sessions"; the next moment he was sprawling with his
+heels in the air.  Bagg says there was nothing remarkable in that; he was
+only flung by a kind of wrestling trick, which he could easily have
+baffled had he been aware of it.  "You will not do that again, sir," said
+he, as he got up and put himself on his guard.  The fellow laughed again
+more strangely and awkwardly than before; then, bending his body and
+moving his head from one side to the other as a cat does before she
+springs, and crying out, "Here's for ye, sodger!" he made a dart at Bagg,
+rushing in with his head foremost.  "That will do, sir," says Bagg, and,
+drawing himself back, he put in a left-handed blow with all the force of
+his body and arm, just over the fellow's right eye--Bagg is a left-handed
+hitter, you must know--and it was a blow of that kind which won him his
+famous battle at Edinburgh with the big Highland sergeant.  Bagg says
+that he was quite satisfied with the blow, more especially when he saw
+the fellow reel, fling out his arms, and fall to the ground.  "And now,
+sir," said he, "I'll make bold to hand you over to the quarter sessions,
+and, if there is a hundred pounds for taking you, who has more right to
+it than myself?"  So he went forward, but ere he could lay hold of his
+man the other was again on his legs, and was prepared to renew the
+combat.  They grappled each other--Bagg says he had not much fear of the
+result, as he now felt himself the best man, the other seeming
+half-stunned with the blow--but just then there came on a blast, a
+horrible roaring wind bearing night upon its wings, snow, and sleet, and
+hail.  Bagg says he had the fellow by the throat quite fast, as he
+thought, but suddenly he became bewildered, and knew not where he was;
+and the man seemed to melt away from his grasp, and the wind howled more
+and more, and the night poured down darker and darker; the snow and the
+sleet thicker and more blinding.  "Lord have mercy upon us!" said Bagg.'
+
+_Myself_.  A strange adventure that; it is well that Bagg got home alive.
+
+_John_.  He says that the fight was a fair fight, and that the fling he
+got was a fair fling, the result of a common enough wrestling trick.  But
+with respect to the storm, which rose up just in time to save the fellow,
+he is of opinion that it was not fair, but something Irish and
+supernatural.
+
+_Myself_.  I daresay he's right.  I have read of witchcraft in the Bible.
+
+_John_.  He wishes much to have one more encounter with the fellow; he
+says that on fair ground, and in fine weather, he has no doubt that he
+could master him, and hand him over to the quarter sessions.  He says
+that a hundred pounds would be no bad thing to be disbanded upon; for he
+wishes to take an inn at Swanton Morley, keep a cock-pit, and live
+respectably.
+
+_Myself_.  He is quite right; and now kiss me, my darling brother, for I
+must go back through the bog to Templemore.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII
+
+
+Groom and cob--Strength and symmetry--Where's the saddle?--The first
+ride--No more fatigue--Love for horses--Pursuit of words--Philologist and
+Pegasus--The smith--What more, agrah?--Sassannach tenpence.
+
+And it came to pass that, as I was standing by the door of the barrack
+stable, one of the grooms came out to me, saying, 'I say, young
+gentleman, I wish you would give the cob a breathing this fine morning.'
+
+'Why do you wish me to mount him?' said I; 'you know he is dangerous.  I
+saw him fling you off his back only a few days ago.'
+
+'Why, that's the very thing, master.  I'd rather see anybody on his back
+than myself; he does not like me; but, to them he does, he can be as
+gentle as a lamb.'
+
+'But suppose,' said I, 'that he should not like me?'
+
+'We shall soon see that, master,' said the groom; 'and, if so be he shows
+temper, I will be the first to tell you to get down.  But there's no fear
+of that; you have never angered or insulted him, and to such as you, I
+say again, he'll be as gentle as a lamb.'
+
+'And how came you to insult him,' said I, 'knowing his temper as you do?'
+
+'Merely through forgetfulness, master: I was riding him about a month
+ago, and having a stick in my hand, I struck him, thinking I was on
+another horse, or rather thinking of nothing at all.  He has never
+forgiven me, though before that time he was the only friend I had in the
+world; I should like to see you on him, master.'
+
+'I should soon be off him; I can't ride.'
+
+'Then you are all right, master; there's no fear.  Trust him for not
+hurting a young gentleman, an officer's son, who can't ride.  If you were
+a blackguard dragoon, indeed, with long spurs, 'twere another thing; as
+it is, he'll treat you as if he were the elder brother that loves you.
+Ride!  He'll soon teach you to ride if you leave the matter with him.
+He's the best riding-master in all Ireland, and the gentlest.'
+
+The cob was led forth; what a tremendous creature!  I had frequently seen
+him before, and wondered at him; he was barely fifteen hands, but he had
+the girth of a metropolitan dray-horse; his head was small in comparison
+with his immense neck, which curved down nobly to his wide back: his
+chest was broad and fine, and his shoulders models of symmetry and
+strength; he stood well and powerfully upon his legs, which were somewhat
+short.  In a word, he was a gallant specimen of the genuine Irish cob, a
+species at one time not uncommon, but at the present day nearly extinct.
+
+'There!' said the groom, as he looked at him, half admiringly, half
+sorrowfully, 'with sixteen stone on his back, he'll trot fourteen miles
+in one hour, with your nine stone, some two and a half more ay, and clear
+a six-foot wall at the end of it.'
+
+'I'm half afraid,' said I; 'I had rather you would ride him.'
+
+'I'd rather so, too, if he would let me; but he remembers the blow.  Now,
+don't be afraid, young master, he's longing to go out himself.  He's been
+trampling with his feet these three days, and I know what that means;
+he'll let anybody ride him but myself, and thank them; but to me he says,
+"No! you struck me."'
+
+'But,' said I, 'where's the saddle?'
+
+'Never mind the saddle; if you are ever to be a frank rider, you must
+begin without a saddle; besides, if he felt a saddle, he would think you
+don't trust him, and leave you to yourself.  Now, before you mount, make
+his acquaintance--see there, how he kisses you and licks your face, and
+see how he lifts his foot, that's to shake hands.  You may trust him--now
+you are on his back at last; mind how you hold the bridle--gently,
+gently!  It's not four pair of hands like yours can hold him if he wishes
+to be off.  Mind what I tell you--leave it all to him.'
+
+Off went the cob at a slow and gentle trot, too fast and rough, however,
+for so inexperienced a rider.  I soon felt myself sliding off, the animal
+perceived it too, and instantly stood stone still till I had righted
+myself; and now the groom came up: 'When you feel yourself going,' said
+he, 'don't lay hold of the mane, that's no use; mane never yet saved man
+from falling, no more than straw from drowning; it's his sides you must
+cling to with your calves and feet, till you learn to balance yourself.
+That's it, now abroad with you; I'll bet my comrade a pot of beer that
+you'll be a regular rough-rider by the time you come back.'
+
+And so it proved; I followed the directions of the groom, and the cob
+gave me every assistance.  How easy is riding, after the first timidity
+is got over, to supple and youthful limbs; and there is no second fear.
+The creature soon found that the nerves of his rider were in proper tone.
+Turning his head half round, he made a kind of whining noise, flung out a
+little foam, and set off.
+
+In less than two hours I had made the circuit of the Devil's Mountain,
+and was returning along the road, bathed with perspiration, but screaming
+with delight; the cob laughing in his equine way, scattering foam and
+pebbles to the left and right, and trotting at the rate of sixteen miles
+an hour.
+
+Oh, that ride! that first ride!--most truly it was an epoch in my
+existence; and I still look back to it with feelings of longing and
+regret.  People may talk of first love--it is a very agreeable event, I
+daresay--but give me the flush, and triumph, and glorious sweat of a
+first ride, like mine on the mighty cob!  My whole frame was shaken, it
+is true; and during one long week I could hardly move foot or hand; but
+what of that?  By that one trial I had become free, as I may say, of the
+whole equine species.  No more fatigue, no more stiffness of joints,
+after that first ride round the Devil's Hill on the cob.
+
+Oh, that cob! that Irish cob!--may the sod lie lightly over the bones of
+the strongest, speediest, and most gallant of its kind!  Oh! the days
+when, issuing from the barrack-gate of Templemore, we commenced our hurry-
+skurry just as inclination led--now across the fields--direct over stone
+walls and running brooks--mere pastime for the cob!--sometimes along the
+road to Thurles and Holy Cross, even to distant Cahir!--what was distance
+to the cob?
+
+It was thus that the passion for the equine race was first awakened
+within me--a passion which, up to the present time, has been rather on
+the increase than diminishing.  It is no blind passion; the horse being a
+noble and generous creature, intended by the All-Wise to be the helper
+and friend of man, to whom he stands next in the order of creation.  On
+many occasions of my life I have been much indebted to the horse, and
+have found in him a friend and coadjutor, when human help and sympathy
+were not to be obtained.  It is therefore natural enough that I should
+love the horse; but the love which I entertain for him has always been
+blended with respect; for I soon perceived that, though disposed to be
+the friend and helper of man, he is by no means inclined to be his slave;
+in which respect he differs from the dog, who will crouch when beaten;
+whereas the horse spurns, for he is aware of his own worth and that he
+carries death within the horn of his heel.  If, therefore, I found it
+easy to love the horse, I found it equally natural to respect him.
+
+I much question whether philology, or the passion for languages, requires
+so little of an apology as the love for horses.  It has been said, I
+believe, that the more languages a man speaks, the more a man is he;
+which is very true, provided he acquires languages as a medium for
+becoming acquainted with the thoughts and feelings of the various
+sections into which the human race is divided; but, in that case, he
+should rather be termed a philosopher than a philologist--between which
+two the difference is wide indeed!  An individual may speak and read a
+dozen languages, and yet be an exceedingly poor creature, scarcely half a
+man; and the pursuit of tongues for their own sake, and the mere
+satisfaction of acquiring them, surely argues an intellect of a very low
+order; a mind disposed to be satisfied with mean and grovelling things;
+taking more pleasure in the trumpery casket than in the precious treasure
+which it contains; in the pursuit of words, than in the acquisition of
+ideas.
+
+I cannot help thinking that it was fortunate for myself, who am, to a
+certain extent, a philologist, that with me the pursuit of languages has
+been always modified by the love of horses; for scarcely had I turned my
+mind to the former, when I also mounted the wild cob, and hurried forth
+in the direction of the Devil's Hill, scattering dust and flint-stones on
+every side; that ride, amongst other things, taught me that a lad with
+thews and sinews was intended by nature for something better than mere
+word-culling; and if I have accomplished anything in after life worthy of
+mentioning, I believe it may partly be attributed to the ideas which that
+ride, by setting my blood in a glow, infused into my brain.  I might,
+otherwise, have become a mere philologist; one of those beings who toil
+night and day in culling useless words for some _opus magnum_ which
+Murray will never publish, and nobody ever read; beings without
+enthusiasm, who, having never mounted a generous steed, cannot detect a
+good point in Pegasus himself; like a certain philologist, who, though
+acquainted with the exact value of every word in the Greek and Latin
+languages, could observe no particular beauty in one of the most glorious
+of Homer's rhapsodies.  What knew he of Pegasus? he had never mounted a
+generous steed; the merest jockey, had the strain been interpreted to
+him, would have called it a brave song!--I return to the brave cob.
+
+On a certain day I had been out on an excursion.  In a cross-road, at
+some distance from the Satanic hill, the animal which I rode cast a shoe.
+By good luck a small village was at hand, at the entrance of which was a
+large shed, from which proceeded a most furious noise of hammering.
+Leading the cob by the bridle, I entered boldly.  'Shoe this horse, and
+do it quickly, a gough,' said I to a wild grimy figure of a man, whom I
+found alone, fashioning a piece of iron.
+
+'Arrigod yuit?' said the fellow, desisting from his work, and staring at
+me.
+
+'Oh yes, I have money,' said I, 'and of the best'; and I pulled out an
+English shilling.
+
+'Tabhair chugam?' said the smith, stretching out his grimy hand.
+
+'No, I shan't,' said I; 'some people are glad to get their money when
+their work is done.'
+
+The fellow hammered a little longer, and then proceeded to shoe the cob,
+after having first surveyed it with attention.  He performed his job
+rather roughly, and more than once appeared to give the animal
+unnecessary pain, frequently making use of loud and boisterous words.  By
+the time the work was done, the creature was in a state of high
+excitement, and plunged and tore.  The smith stood at a short distance,
+seeming to enjoy the irritation of the animal, and showing, in a
+remarkable manner, a huge fang, which projected from the under jaw of a
+very wry mouth.
+
+'You deserve better handling,' said I, as I went up to the cob and
+fondled it; whereupon it whinnied, and attempted to touch my face with
+its nose.
+
+{picture:'Arrigod yuit?' said the fellow, desisting from his work, and
+staring at me: page94.jpg}
+
+'Are ye not afraid of that beast?' said the smith, showing his fang.
+'Arrah, it's vicious that he looks!'
+
+'It's at you, then!--I don't fear him'; and thereupon I passed under the
+horse, between its hind legs.
+
+'And is that all you can do, agrah?' said the smith.
+
+'No,' said I, 'I can ride him.'
+
+'Ye can ride him, and what else, agrah?'
+
+'I can leap him over a six-foot wall,' said I.
+
+'Over a wall, and what more, agrah?'
+
+'Nothing more,' said I; 'what more would you have?'
+
+'Can you do this, agrah?' said the smith; and he uttered a word which I
+had never heard before, in a sharp pungent tone.  The effect upon myself
+was somewhat extraordinary, a strange thrill ran through me; but with
+regard to the cob it was terrible; the animal forthwith became like one
+mad, and reared and kicked with the utmost desperation.
+
+'Can you do that, agrah?' said the smith.
+
+'What is it?' said I, retreating, 'I never saw the horse so before.'
+
+'Go between his legs, agrah,' said the smith, 'his hinder legs'; and he
+again showed his fang.
+
+'I dare not,' said I, 'he would kill me.'
+
+'He would kill ye! and how do ye know that, agrah?'
+
+'I feel he would,' said I, 'something tells me so.'
+
+'And it tells ye truth, agrah; but it's a fine beast, and it's a pity to
+see him in such a state: Is agam an't leigeas'--and here he uttered
+another word in a voice singularly modified, but sweet and almost
+plaintive; the effect of it was as instantaneous as that of the other,
+but how different!--the animal lost all its fury, and became at once calm
+and gentle.  The smith went up to it, coaxed and patted it, making use of
+various sounds of equine endearment; then turning to me, and holding out
+once more the grimy hand, he said, 'And now ye will be giving me the
+Sassannach tenpence, agrah?'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV
+
+
+A fine old city--Norman master-work--Lollards' Hole--Good blood--The
+Spaniard's sword--Old retired officer--Writing to a duke--God help the
+child--Nothing like Jacob--Irish brigades--Old Sergeant Meredith--I have
+been young--Idleness--Only course open--The bookstall--A portrait--A
+banished priest.
+
+From the wild scenes which I have attempted to describe in the latter
+pages I must now transport the reader to others of a widely different
+character.  He must suppose himself no longer in Ireland, but in the
+eastern corner of merry England.  Bogs, ruins, and mountains have
+disappeared amidst the vapours of the west: I have nothing more to say of
+them; the region in which we are now is not famous for objects of that
+kind: perhaps it flatters itself that it can produce fairer and better
+things, of some of which let me speak; there is a fine old city before
+us, and first of that let me speak.
+
+A fine old city, truly, is that, view it from whatever side you will; but
+it shows best from the east, where the ground, bold and elevated,
+overlooks the fair and fertile valley in which it stands.  Gazing from
+those heights, the eye beholds a scene which cannot fail to awaken, even
+in the least sensitive bosom, feelings of pleasure and admiration.  At
+the foot of the heights flows a narrow and deep river, with an antique
+bridge communicating with a long and narrow suburb, flanked on either
+side by rich meadows of the brightest green, beyond which spreads the
+city; the fine old city, perhaps the most curious specimen at present
+extant of the genuine old English town.  Yes, there it spreads from north
+to south, with its venerable houses, its numerous gardens, its thrice
+twelve churches, its mighty mound, which, if tradition speaks true, was
+raised by human hands to serve as the grave-heap of an old heathen king,
+who sits deep within it, with his sword in his hand, and his gold and
+silver treasures about him.  There is a gray old castle upon the top of
+that mighty mound; and yonder, rising three hundred feet above the soil,
+from among those noble forest trees, behold that old Norman master-work,
+that cloud-encircled cathedral spire, around which a garrulous army of
+rooks and choughs continually wheel their flight.  Now, who can wonder
+that the children of that fine old city are proud of her, and offer up
+prayers for her prosperity?  I, myself, who was not born within her
+walls, offer up prayers for her prosperity, that want may never visit her
+cottages, vice her palaces, and that the abomination of idolatry may
+never pollute her temples.  Ha, idolatry! the reign of idolatry has been
+over there for many a long year, never more, let us hope, to return;
+brave hearts in that old town have borne witness against it, and sealed
+their testimony with their hearts' blood--most precious to the Lord is
+the blood of His saints! we are not far from hallowed ground.  Observe ye
+not yon chalky precipice, to the right of the Norman bridge?  On this
+side of the stream, upon its brow, is a piece of ruined wall, the last
+relic of what was of old a stately pile, whilst at its foot is a place
+called the Lollards' Hole; and with good reason, for many a saint of God
+has breathed his last beneath that white precipice, bearing witness
+against popish idolatry, midst flame and pitch; many a grisly procession
+has advanced along that suburb, across the old bridge, towards the
+Lollards' Hole: furious priests in front, a calm pale martyr in the
+midst, a pitying multitude behind.  It has had its martyrs, the venerable
+old town!
+
+Ah! there is good blood in that old city, and in the whole circumjacent
+region of which it is the capital.  The Angles possessed the land at an
+early period, which, however, they were eventually compelled to share
+with hordes of Danes and Northmen, who flocked thither across the sea to
+found hearthsteads on its fertile soil.  The present race, a mixture of
+Angles and Danes, still preserve much which speaks strongly of their
+northern ancestry; amongst them ye will find the light-brown hair of the
+north, the strong and burly forms of the north, many a wild superstition,
+ay, and many a wild name connected with the ancient history of the north
+and its sublime mythology; the warm heart and the strong heart of the old
+Danes and Saxons still beats in those regions, and there ye will find, if
+anywhere, old northern hospitality and kindness of manner, united with
+energy, perseverance, and dauntless intrepidity; better soldiers or
+mariners never bled in their country's battles than those nurtured in
+those regions, and within those old walls.  It was yonder, to the west,
+that the great naval hero of Britain first saw the light; he who
+annihilated the sea pride of Spain, and dragged the humbled banner of
+France in triumph at his stem.  He was born yonder, towards the west, and
+of him there is a glorious relic in that old town; in its dark flint
+guildhouse, the roof of which you can just descry rising above that maze
+of buildings, in the upper hall of justice, is a species of glass shrine,
+in which the relic is to be seen; a sword of curious workmanship, the
+blade is of keen Toledan steel, the heft of ivory and mother-of-pearl.
+'Tis the sword of Cordova, won in bloodiest fray off Saint Vincent's
+promontory, and presented by Nelson to the old capital of the much-loved
+land of his birth.  Yes, the proud Spaniard's sword is to be seen in
+yonder guildhouse, in the glass case affixed to the wall: many other
+relics has the good old town, but none prouder than the Spaniard's sword.
+
+Such was the place to which, when the war was over, my father retired: it
+was here that the old tired soldier set himself down with his little
+family.  He had passed the greater part of his life in meritorious
+exertion, in the service of his country, and his chief wish now was to
+spend the remainder of his days in quiet and respectability; his means,
+it is true, were not very ample; fortunate it was that his desires
+corresponded with them; with a small fortune of his own, and with his
+half-pay as a royal soldier, he had no fears for himself or for his
+faithful partner and helpmate; but then his children! how was he to
+provide for them? how launch them upon the wide ocean of the world?  This
+was, perhaps, the only thought which gave him uneasiness, and I believe
+that many an old retired officer at that time, and under similar
+circumstances, experienced similar anxiety; had the war continued, their
+children would have been, of course, provided for in the army, but peace
+now reigned, and the military career was closed to all save the scions of
+the aristocracy, or those who were in some degree connected with that
+privileged order, an advantage which few of these old officers could
+boast of; they had slight influence with the great, who gave themselves
+very little trouble either about them or their families.
+
+'I have been writing to the Duke,' said my father one day to my excellent
+mother, after we had been at home somewhat better than a year.  'I have
+been writing to the Duke of York about a commission for that eldest boy
+of ours.  He, however, affords me no hopes; he says that his list is
+crammed with names, and that the greater number of the candidates have
+better claims than my son.'
+
+'I do not see how that can be,' said my mother.
+
+'Nor do I,' replied my father.  'I see the sons of bankers and merchants
+gazetted every month, and I do not see what claims they have to urge,
+unless they be golden ones.  However, I have not served my king fifty
+years to turn grumbler at this time of life.  I suppose that the people
+at the head of affairs know what is most proper and convenient; perhaps
+when the lad sees how difficult, nay, how impossible it is that he should
+enter the army, he will turn his mind to some other profession; I wish he
+may!'
+
+'I think he has already,' said my mother; 'you see how fond he is of the
+arts, of drawing and painting, and, as far as I can judge, what he has
+already done is very respectable; his mind seems quite turned that way,
+and I heard him say the other day that he would sooner be a Michael
+Angelo than a general officer.  But you are always talking of him; what
+do you think of doing with the other child?'
+
+'What, indeed!' said my father; 'that is a consideration which gives me
+no little uneasiness.  I am afraid it will be much more difficult to
+settle him in life than his brother.  What is he fitted for, even were it
+in my power to provide for him?  God help the child!  I bear him no ill
+will, on the contrary, all love and affection; but I cannot shut my eyes;
+there is something so strange about him!  How he behaved in Ireland!  I
+sent him to school to learn Greek, and he picked up Irish!'
+
+'And Greek as well,' said my mother.  'I heard him say the other day that
+he could read St. John in the original tongue.'
+
+'You will find excuses for him, I know,' said my father.  'You tell me I
+am always talking of my first-born; I might retort by saying you are
+always thinking of the other: but it is the way of women always to side
+with the second-born.  There's what's her name in the Bible, by whose
+wiles the old blind man was induced to give to his second son the
+blessing which was the birthright of the other.  I wish I had been in his
+place!  I should not have been so easily deceived! no disguise would ever
+have caused me to mistake an impostor for my first-born.  Though I must
+say for this boy that he is nothing like Jacob; he is neither smooth nor
+sleek, and, though my second-born, is already taller and larger than his
+brother.'
+
+'Just so,' said my mother; 'his brother would make a far better Jacob
+than he.'
+
+'I will hear nothing against my first-born,' said my father, 'even in the
+way of insinuation: he is my joy and pride; the very image of myself in
+my youthful days, long before I fought Big Ben; though perhaps not quite
+so tall or strong built.  As for the other, God bless the child!  I love
+him, I'm sure; but I must be blind not to see the difference between him
+and his brother.  Why, he has neither my hair nor my eyes; and then his
+countenance! why, 'tis absolutely swarthy, God forgive me!  I had almost
+said like that of a gypsy, but I have nothing to say against that; the
+boy is not to be blamed for the colour of his face, nor for his hair and
+eyes; but, then, his ways and manners!--I confess I do not like them, and
+that they give me no little uneasiness--I know that he kept very strange
+company when he was in Ireland; people of evil report, of whom terrible
+things were said--horse-witches and the like.  I questioned him once or
+twice upon the matter, and even threatened him, but it was of no use; he
+put on a look as if he did not understand me, a regular Irish look, just
+such a one as those rascals assume when they wish to appear all innocence
+and simplicity, and they full of malice and deceit all the time.  I don't
+like them; they are no friends to old England, or its old king, God bless
+him!  They are not good subjects, and never were; always in league with
+foreign enemies.  When I was in the Coldstream, long before the
+Revolution, I used to hear enough about the Irish brigades kept by the
+French kings, to be a thorn in the side of the English whenever
+opportunity served.  Old Sergeant Meredith once told me that in the time
+of the Pretender there were always, in London alone, a dozen of fellows
+connected with these brigades, with the view of seducing the king's
+soldiers from their allegiance, and persuading them to desert to France
+to join the honest Irish, as they were called.  One of these traitors
+once accosted him and proposed the matter to him, offering handfuls of
+gold if he could induce any of his comrades to go over.  Meredith
+appeared to consent, but secretly gave information to his colonel; the
+fellow was seized, and certain traitorous papers found upon him; he was
+hanged before Newgate, and died exulting in his treason.  His name was
+Michael Nowlan.  That ever son of mine should have been intimate with the
+Papist Irish, and have learnt their language!'
+
+'But he thinks of other things now,' said my mother.
+
+'Other languages, you mean,' said my father.  'It is strange that he has
+conceived such a zest for the study of languages; no sooner did he come
+home than he persuaded me to send him to that old priest to learn French
+and Italian, and, if I remember right, you abetted him; but, as I said
+before, it is in the nature of women invariably to take the part of the
+second-born.  Well, there is no harm in learning French and Italian,
+perhaps much good in his case, as they may drive the other tongue out of
+his head.  Irish! why, he might go to the university but for that; but
+how would he look when, on being examined with respect to his
+attainments, it was discovered that he understood Irish?  How did you
+learn it? they would ask him; how did you become acquainted with the
+language of Papists and rebels?  The boy would be sent away in disgrace.'
+
+'Be under no apprehension, I have no doubt that he has long since
+forgotten it.'
+
+'I am glad to hear it,' said my father; 'for, between ourselves, I love
+the poor child; ay, quite as well as my first-born.  I trust they will do
+well, and that God will be their shield and guide; I have no doubt He
+will, for I have read something in the Bible to that effect.  What is
+that text about the young ravens being fed?'
+
+'I know a better than that,' said my mother; 'one of David's own words,
+"I have been young and now am grown old, yet never have I seen the
+righteous man forsaken, or his seed begging their bread."'
+
+I have heard talk of the pleasures of idleness, yet it is my own firm
+belief that no one ever yet took pleasure in it.  Mere idleness is the
+most disagreeable state of existence, and both mind and body are
+continually making efforts to escape from it.  It has been said that
+idleness is the parent of mischief, which is very true; but mischief
+itself is merely an attempt to escape from the dreary vacuum of idleness.
+There are many tasks and occupations which a man is unwilling to perform,
+but let no one think that he is therefore in love with idleness; he turns
+to something which is more agreeable to his inclination, and doubtless
+more suited to his nature; but he is not in love with idleness.  A boy
+may play the truant from school because he dislikes books and study; but,
+depend upon it, he intends doing something the while--to go fishing, or
+perhaps to take a walk; and who knows but that from such excursions both
+his mind and body may derive more benefit than from books and school?
+Many people go to sleep to escape from idleness; the Spaniards do; and,
+according to the French account, John Bull, the 'squire, hangs himself in
+the month of November; but the French, who are a very sensible people,
+attribute the action _a une grande envie de se desennuyer_; he wishes to
+be doing something, say they, and having nothing better to do, he has
+recourse to the cord.
+
+It was for want of something better to do that, shortly after my return
+home, I applied myself to the study of languages.  By the acquisition of
+Irish, with the first elements of which I had become acquainted under the
+tuition of Murtagh, I had contracted a certain zest and inclination for
+the pursuit.  Yet it is probable that had I been launched about this time
+into some agreeable career, that of arms for example, for which, being
+the son of a soldier, I had, as was natural, a sort of penchant, I might
+have thought nothing more of the acquisition of tongues of any kind; but,
+having nothing to do, I followed the only course suited to my genius
+which appeared open to me.
+
+So it came to pass that one day, whilst wandering listlessly about the
+streets of the old town, I came to a small book-stall, and stopping,
+commenced turning over the books; I took up at least a dozen, and almost
+instantly flung them down.  What were they to me?  At last, coming to a
+thick volume, I opened it, and after inspecting its contents for a few
+minutes, I paid for it what was demanded, and forthwith carried it home.
+
+It was a tessaraglot grammar; a strange old book, printed somewhere in
+Holland, which pretended to be an easy guide to the acquirement of the
+French, Italian, Low Dutch, and English tongues, by means of which any
+one conversant in any one of these languages could make himself master of
+the other three.  I turned my attention to the French and Italian.  The
+old book was not of much value; I derived some benefit from it, however,
+and, conning it intensely, at the end of a few weeks obtained some
+insight into the structure of these two languages.  At length I had
+learnt all that the book was capable of informing me, yet was still far
+from the goal to which it had promised to conduct me.  'I wish I had a
+master!' I exclaimed; and the master was at hand.  In an old court of the
+old town lived a certain elderly personage, perhaps sixty, or
+thereabouts; he was rather tall, and something of a robust make, with a
+countenance in which bluffness was singularly blended with vivacity and
+grimace; and with a complexion which would have been ruddy, but for a
+yellow hue which rather predominated.  His dress consisted of a snuff-
+coloured coat and drab pantaloons, the former evidently seldom subjected
+to the annoyance of a brush, and the latter exhibiting here and there
+spots of something which, if not grease, bore a strong resemblance to it;
+add to these articles an immense frill, seldom of the purest white, but
+invariably of the finest French cambric, and you have some idea of his
+dress.  He had rather a remarkable stoop, but his step was rapid and
+vigorous, and as he hurried along the streets, he would glance to the
+right and left with a pair of big eyes like plums, and on recognising any
+one would exalt a pair of grizzled eyebrows, and slightly kiss a tawny
+and ungloved hand.  At certain hours of the day be might be seen entering
+the doors of female boarding-schools, generally with a book in his hand,
+and perhaps another just peering from the orifice of a capacious back
+pocket; and at a certain season of the year he might be seen, dressed in
+white, before the altar of a certain small popish chapel, chanting from
+the breviary in very intelligible Latin, or perhaps reading from the desk
+in utterly unintelligible English.  Such was my preceptor in the French
+and Italian tongues.  'Exul sacerdos; vone banished priest.  I came into
+England twenty-five year ago, "my dear."'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV
+
+
+Monsieur Dante--Condemned musket--Sporting--Sweet rivulet--The Earl's
+Home--The pool--The sonorous voice--What dost thou read?--Man of
+peace--Zohar and Mishna--Money-changers.
+
+So I studied French and Italian under the tuition of the banished priest,
+to whose house I went regularly every evening to receive instruction.  I
+made considerable progress in the acquisition of the two languages.  I
+found the French by far the most difficult, chiefly on account of the
+accent, which my master himself possessed in no great purity, being a
+Norman by birth.  The Italian was my favourite.
+
+'Vous serez un jour un grand philologue, mon cher,' said the old man, on
+our arriving at the conclusion of Dante's Hell.
+
+'I hope I shall be something better,' said I, 'before I die, or I shall
+have lived to little purpose.'
+
+'That's true, my dear! philologist--one small poor dog.  What would you
+wish to be?'
+
+'Many things sooner than that; for example, I would rather be like him
+who wrote this book.'
+
+'Quoi, Monsieur Dante?  He was a vagabond, my dear, forced to fly from
+his country.  No, my dear, if you would be like one poet, be like
+Monsieur Boileau; he is the poet.'
+
+'I don't think so.'
+
+'How, not think so?  He wrote very respectable verses; lived and died
+much respected by everybody.  T'other, one bad dog, forced to fly from
+his country--died with not enough to pay his undertaker.'
+
+'Were you not forced to flee from your country?'
+
+'That very true; but there is much difference between me and this Dante.
+He fled from country because he had one bad tongue which he shook at his
+betters.  I fly because benefice gone, and head going; not on account of
+the badness of my tongue.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'you can return now; the Bourbons are restored.'
+
+'I find myself very well here; not bad country.  Il est vrai que la
+France sera toujours la France; but all are dead there who knew me.  I
+find myself very well here.  Preach in popish chapel, teach schismatic,
+that is Protestant, child tongues and literature.  I find myself very
+well; and why?  Because I know how to govern my tongue; never call people
+hard names.  Ma foi, il y a beaucoup de difference entre moi et ce sacre
+de Dante.'
+
+Under this old man, who was well versed in the southern languages,
+besides studying French and Italian, I acquired some knowledge of
+Spanish.  But I did not devote my time entirely to philology; I had other
+pursuits.  I had not forgotten the roving life I had led in former days,
+nor its delights; neither was I formed by Nature to be a pallid indoor
+student.  No, no!  I was fond of other and, I say it boldly, better
+things than study.  I had an attachment to the angle, ay, and to the gun
+likewise.  In our house was a condemned musket, bearing somewhere on its
+lock, in rather antique characters, 'Tower, 1746'; with this weapon I had
+already, in Ireland, performed some execution among the rooks and
+choughs, and it was now again destined to be a source of solace and
+amusement to me, in the winter season, especially on occasions of severe
+frost when birds abounded.  Sallying forth with it at these times, far
+into the country, I seldom returned at night without a string of
+bullfinches, blackbirds, and linnets hanging in triumph round my neck.
+When I reflect on the immense quantity of powder and shot which I crammed
+down the muzzle of my uncouth fowling-piece, I am less surprised at the
+number of birds which I slaughtered than that I never blew my hands,
+face, and old honeycombed gun, at one and the same time, to pieces.
+
+But the winter, alas! (I speak as a fowler) seldom lasts in England more
+than three or four months; so, during the rest of the year, when not
+occupied with my philological studies, I had to seek for other
+diversions.  I have already given a hint that I was also addicted to the
+angle.  Of course there is no comparison between the two pursuits, the
+rod and line seeming but very poor trumpery to one who has had the honour
+of carrying a noble firelock.  There is a time, however, for all things;
+and we return to any favourite amusement with the greater zest, from
+being compelled to relinquish it for a season.  So, if I shot birds in
+winter with my firelock, I caught fish in summer, or attempted so to do,
+with my angle.  I was not quite so successful, it is true, with the
+latter as with the former; possibly because it afforded me less pleasure.
+It was, indeed, too much of a listless pastime to inspire me with any
+great interest.  I not unfrequently fell into a doze, whilst sitting on
+the bank, and more than once let my rod drop from my hands into the
+water.
+
+At some distance from the city, behind a range of hilly ground which
+rises towards the south-west, is a small river, the waters of which,
+after many meanderings, eventually enter the principal river of the
+district, and assist to swell the tide which it rolls down to the ocean.
+It is a sweet rivulet, and pleasant is it to trace its course from its
+spring-head, high up in the remote regions of Eastern Anglia, till it
+arrives in the valley behind yon rising ground; and pleasant is that
+valley, truly a goodly spot, but most lovely where yonder bridge crosses
+the little stream.  Beneath its arch the waters rush garrulously into a
+blue pool, and are there stilled, for a time, for the pool is deep, and
+they appear to have sunk to sleep.  Farther on, however, you hear their
+voice again, where they ripple gaily over yon gravelly shallow.  On the
+left, the hill slopes gently down to the margin of the stream.  On the
+right is a green level, a smiling meadow, grass of the richest decks the
+side of the slope; mighty trees also adorn it, giant elms, the nearest of
+which, when the sun is nigh its meridian, fling a broad shadow upon the
+face of the pool; through yon vista you catch a glimpse of the ancient
+brick of an old English hall.  It has a stately look, that old building,
+indistinctly seen, as it is, among those umbrageous trees; you might
+almost suppose it an earl's home; and such it was, or rather upon its
+site stood an earl's home, in days of old, for there some old Kemp, some
+Sigurd or Thorkild, roaming in quest of a hearthstead, settled down in
+the gray old time, when Thor and Freya were yet gods, and Odin was a
+portentous name.  Yon old hall is still called the Earl's Home, though
+the hearth of Sigurd is now no more, and the bones of the old Kemp, and
+of Sigrith his dame, have been mouldering for a thousand years in some
+neighbouring knoll; perhaps yonder, where those tall Norwegian pines
+shoot up so boldly into the air.  It is said that the old earl's galley
+was once moored where is now that blue pool, for the waters of that
+valley were not always sweet; yon valley was once an arm of the sea, a
+salt lagoon, to which the war-barks of 'Sigurd, in search of a home,'
+found their way.
+
+I was in the habit of spending many an hour on the banks of that rivulet,
+with my rod in my hand, and, when tired with angling, would stretch
+myself on the grass, and gaze upon the waters as they glided past, and
+not unfrequently, divesting myself of my dress, I would plunge into the
+deep pool which I have already mentioned, for I had long since learned to
+swim.  And it came to pass that on one hot summer's day, after bathing in
+the pool, I passed along the meadow till I came to a shallow part, and,
+wading over to the opposite side, I adjusted my dress, and commenced
+fishing in another pool, beside which was a small clump of hazels.
+
+And there I sat upon the bank, at the bottom of the hill which slopes
+down from 'the Earl's home'; my float was on the waters, and my back was
+towards the old hall.  I drew up many fish, small and great, which I took
+from off the hook mechanically, and flung upon the bank, for I was almost
+unconscious of what I was about, for my mind was not with my fish.  I was
+thinking of my earlier years--of the Scottish crags and the heaths of
+Ireland--and sometimes my mind would dwell on my studies--on the sonorous
+stanzas of Dante, rising and falling like the waves of the sea--or would
+strive to remember a couplet or two of poor Monsieur Boileau.
+
+'Canst thou answer to thy conscience for pulling all those fish out of
+the water, and leaving them to gasp in the sun?' said a voice, clear and
+sonorous as a bell.
+
+I started, and looked round.  Close behind me stood the tall figure of a
+man, dressed in raiment of quaint and singular fashion, but of goodly
+materials.  He was in the prime and vigour of manhood; his features
+handsome and noble, but full of calmness and benevolence; at least I
+thought so, though they were somewhat shaded by a hat of finest beaver,
+with broad drooping eaves.
+
+'Surely that is a very cruel diversion in which thou indulgest, my young
+friend?' he continued.
+
+'I am sorry for it, if it be, sir,' said I, rising; 'but I do not think
+it cruel to fish.'
+
+'What are thy reasons for not thinking so?'
+
+'Fishing is mentioned frequently in Scripture.  Simon Peter was a
+fisherman.'
+
+'True; and Andrew and his brother.  But thou forgettest: they did not
+follow fishing as a diversion, as I fear thou doest.--Thou readest the
+Scriptures?'
+
+'Sometimes.'
+
+'Sometimes?--not daily?--that is to be regretted.  What profession dost
+thou make?--I mean to what religious denomination dost thou belong, my
+young friend.'
+
+'Church?'
+
+'It is a very good profession--there is much of Scripture contained in
+its liturgy.  Dost thou read aught besides the Scriptures?'
+
+'Sometimes.'
+
+'What dost thou read besides?'
+
+'Greek, and Dante.'
+
+'Indeed! then thou hast the advantage over myself; I can only read the
+former.  Well, I am rejoiced to find that thou hast other pursuits beside
+thy fishing.  Dost thou know Hebrew?'
+
+'No.'
+
+'Thou shouldst study it.  Why dost thou not undertake the study?'
+
+'I have no books.'
+
+'I will lend thee books, if thou wish to undertake the study.  I live
+yonder at the hall, as perhaps thou knowest.  I have a library there, in
+which are many curious books, both in Greek and Hebrew, which I will show
+to thee, whenever thou mayest find it convenient to come and see me.
+Farewell!  I am glad to find that thou hast pursuits more satisfactory
+than thy cruel fishing.'
+
+And the man of peace departed, and left me on the bank of the stream.
+Whether from the effect of his words, or from want of inclination to the
+sport, I know not, but from that day I became less and less a
+practitioner of that 'cruel fishing.'  I rarely flung line and angle into
+the water, but I not unfrequently wandered by the banks of the pleasant
+rivulet.  It seems singular to me, on reflection, that I never availed
+myself of his kind invitation.  I say singular, for the extraordinary,
+under whatever form, had long had no slight interest for me; and I had
+discernment enough to perceive that yon was no common man.  Yet I went
+not near him, certainly not from bashfulness or timidity, feelings to
+which I had long been an entire stranger.  Am I to regret this? perhaps,
+for I might have learned both wisdom and righteousness from those calm,
+quiet lips, and my after-course might have been widely different.  As it
+was, I fell in with other guess companions, from whom I received widely
+different impressions than those I might have derived from him.  When
+many years had rolled on, long after I had attained manhood, and had seen
+and suffered much, and when our first interview had long since been
+effaced from the mind of the man of peace, I visited him in his venerable
+hall, and partook of the hospitality of his hearth.  And there I saw his
+gentle partner and his fair children, and on the morrow he showed me the
+books of which he had spoken years before by the side of the stream.  In
+the low quiet chamber, whose one window, shaded by a gigantic elm, looks
+down the slope towards the pleasant stream, he took from the shelf his
+learned books, Zohar and Mishna, Toldoth Jesu and Abarbenel.  'I am fond
+of these studies,' said he, 'which, perhaps, is not to be wondered at,
+seeing that our people have been compared to the Jews.  In one respect I
+confess we are similar to them; we are fond of getting money.  I do not
+like this last author, this Abarbenel, the worse for having been a money-
+changer.  I am a banker myself, as thou knowest.'
+
+And would there were many like him, amidst the money-changers of princes!
+The hall of many an earl lacks the bounty, the palace of many a prelate
+the piety and learning, which adorn the quiet quaker's home!
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI
+
+
+Fair of horses--Looks of respect--The fast trotter--Pair of eyes--Strange
+men--Jasper, your pal--Force of blood--Young lady with diamonds--Not
+quite so beautiful.
+
+I was standing on the castle hill in the midst of a fair of horses.
+
+I have already had occasion to mention this castle.  It is the remains of
+what was once a Norman stronghold, and is perched upon a round mound or
+monticle, in the midst of the old city.  Steep is this mound and scarped,
+evidently by the hand of man; a deep gorge over which is flung a bridge,
+separates it, on the south, from a broad swell of open ground called 'the
+hill'; of old the scene of many a tournament and feat of Norman chivalry,
+but now much used as a show-place for cattle, where those who buy and
+sell beeves and other beasts resort at stated periods.
+
+So it came to pass that I stood upon this hill, observing a fair of
+horses.
+
+The reader is already aware that I had long since conceived a passion for
+the equine race; a passion in which circumstances had of late not
+permitted me to indulge.  I had no horses to ride, but I took pleasure in
+looking at them; and I had already attended more than one of these fairs:
+the present was lively enough, indeed horse fairs are seldom dull.  There
+was shouting and whooping, neighing and braying; there was galloping and
+trotting; fellows with highlows and white stockings, and with many a
+string dangling from the knees of their tight breeches, were running
+desperately, holding horses by the halter, and in some cases dragging
+them along; there were long-tailed steeds and dock-tailed steeds of every
+degree and breed; there were droves of wild ponies, and long rows of
+sober cart horses; there were donkeys, and even mules: the last rare
+things to be seen in damp, misty England, for the mule pines in mud and
+rain, and thrives best with a hot sun above and a burning sand below.
+There were--oh, the gallant creatures!  I hear their neigh upon the wind;
+there were--goodliest sight of all--certain enormous quadrupeds only seen
+to perfection in our native isle, led about by dapper grooms, their manes
+ribanded and their tails curiously clubbed and balled.  Ha! ha!--how
+distinctly do they say, ha! ha!
+
+An old man draws nigh, he is mounted on a lean pony, and he leads by the
+bridle one of these animals; nothing very remarkable about that creature,
+unless in being smaller than the rest and gentle, which they are not; he
+is not of the sightliest look; he is almost dun, and over one eye a thick
+film has gathered.  But stay! there _is_ something remarkable about that
+horse, there is something in his action in which he differs from all the
+rest: as he advances, the clamour is hushed! all eyes are turned upon
+him--what looks of interest--of respect--and, what is this? people are
+taking off their hats--surely not to that steed!  Yes, verily! men,
+especially old men, are taking off their hats to that one-eyed steed, and
+I hear more than one deep-drawn ah!
+
+'What horse is that?' said I to a very old fellow, the counterpart of the
+old man on the pony, save that the last wore a faded suit of velveteen,
+and this one was dressed in a white frock.
+
+'The best in mother England,' said the very old man, taking a knobbed
+stick from his mouth, and looking me in the face, at first carelessly,
+but presently with something like interest; 'he is old like myself, but
+can still trot his twenty miles an hour.  You won't live long, my swain;
+tall and over-grown ones like thee never does; yet, if you should chance
+to reach my years, you may boast to thy great-grand-boys thou hast seen
+Marshland Shales.'
+
+Amain I did for the horse what I would neither do for earl nor baron,
+doffed my hat; yes! I doffed my hat to the wondrous horse, the fast
+trotter, the best in mother England; and I too drew a deep ah! and
+repeated the words of the old fellows around.  'Such a horse as this we
+shall never see again; a pity that he is so old.'
+
+Now during all this time I had a kind of consciousness that I had been
+the object of some person's observation; that eyes were fastened upon me
+from somewhere in the crowd.  Sometimes I thought myself watched from
+before, sometimes from behind; and occasionally methought that, if I just
+turned my head to the right or left, I should meet a peering and
+inquiring glance; and indeed once or twice I did turn, expecting to see
+somebody whom I knew, yet always without success; though it appeared to
+me that I was but a moment too late, and that some one had just slipped
+away from the direction to which I turned, like the figure in a magic
+lanthorn.  Once I was quite sure that there were a pair of eyes glaring
+over my right shoulder; my attention, however, was so fully occupied with
+the objects which I have attempted to describe, that I thought very
+little of this coming and going, this flitting and dodging of I knew not
+whom or what.  It was, after all, a matter of sheer indifference to me
+who was looking at me.  I could only wish whomsoever it might be to be
+more profitably employed; so I continued enjoying what I saw; and now
+there was a change in the scene, the wondrous old horse departed with his
+aged guardian; other objects of interest are at hand; two or three men on
+horseback are hurrying through the crowd, they are widely different in
+their appearance from the other people of the fair; not so much in dress,
+for they are clad something after the fashion of rustic jockeys, but in
+their look--no light-brown hair have they, no ruddy cheeks, no blue quiet
+glances belong to them; their features are dark, their locks long, black,
+and shining, and their eyes are wild; they are admirable horsemen, but
+they do not sit the saddle in the manner of common jockeys, they seem to
+float or hover upon it, like gulls upon the waves; two of them are mere
+striplings, but the third is a very tall man with a countenance
+heroically beautiful, but wild, wild, wild.  As they rush along, the
+crowd give way on all sides, and now a kind of ring or circus is formed,
+within which the strange men exhibit their horsemanship, rushing past
+each other, in and out, after the manner of a reel, the tall man
+occasionally balancing himself upon the saddle, and standing erect on one
+foot.  He had just regained his seat after the latter feat, and was about
+to push his horse to a gallop, when a figure started forward close from
+beside me, and laying his hand on his neck, and pulling him gently
+downward, appeared to whisper something into his ear; presently the tall
+man raised his head, and, scanning the crowd for a moment in the
+direction in which I was standing, fixed his eyes full upon me, and anon
+the countenance of the whisperer was turned, but only in part, and the
+side-glance of another pair of wild eyes was directed towards my face,
+but the entire visage of the big black man, half stooping as he was, was
+turned full upon mine.
+
+{picture:A kind of ring or circus is formed, within which the strange men
+exhibit their horsemanship: page112.jpg}
+
+But now, with a nod to the figure who had stopped him, and with another
+inquiring glance at myself, the big man once more put his steed into
+motion, and, after riding round the ring a few more times, darted through
+a lane in the crowd, and followed by his two companions disappeared,
+whereupon the figure who had whispered to him, and had subsequently
+remained in the middle of the space, came towards me, and, cracking a
+whip which he held in his hand so loudly that the report was nearly equal
+to that of a pocket pistol, he cried in a strange tone:
+
+'What! the sap-engro?  Lor! the sap-engro upon the hill!'
+
+'I remember that word,' said I, 'and I almost think I remember you.  You
+can't be--'
+
+'Jasper, your pal!  Truth, and no lie, brother.'
+
+'It is strange that you should have known me,' said I.  'I am certain,
+but for the word you used, I should never have recognised you.'
+
+'Not so strange as you may think, brother; there is something in your
+face which would prevent people from forgetting you, even though they
+might wish it; and your face is not much altered since the time you wot
+of, though you are so much grown.  I thought it was you, but to make sure
+I dodged about, inspecting you.  I believe you felt me, though I never
+touched you; a sign, brother, that we are akin, that we are dui palor--two
+relations.  Your blood beat when mine was near, as mine always does at
+the coming of a brother; and we became brothers in that lane.'
+
+'And where are you staying?' said I; 'in this town?'
+
+'Not in the town; the like of us don't find it exactly wholesome to stay
+in towns, we keep abroad.  But I have little to do here--come with me,
+and I'll show you where we stay.'
+
+We descended the hill in the direction of the north, and passing along
+the suburb reached the old Norman bridge, which we crossed; the chalk
+precipice, with the ruin on its top, was now before us; but turning to
+the left we walked swiftly along, and presently came to some rising
+ground, which ascending, we found ourselves upon a wild moor or heath.
+
+'You are one of them,' said I, 'whom people call--'
+
+'Just so,' said Jasper; 'but never mind what people call us.'
+
+'And that tall handsome man on the hill, whom you whispered?  I suppose
+he's one of ye.  What is his name?'
+
+'Tawno Chikno,' said Jasper, 'which means the small one; we call him such
+because he is the biggest man of all our nation.  You say he is handsome,
+that is not the word, brother; he's the beauty of the world.  Women run
+wild at the sight of Tawno.  An earl's daughter, near London--a fine
+young lady with diamonds round her neck--fell in love with Tawno.  I have
+seen that lass on a heath, as this may be, kneel down to Tawno, clasp his
+feet, begging to be his wife--or anything else--if she might go with him.
+But Tawno would have nothing to do with her: "I have a wife of my own,"
+said he, "a lawful rommany wife, whom I love better than the whole world,
+jealous though she sometimes be."'
+
+'And is she very beautiful?' said I.
+
+'Why, you know, brother, beauty is frequently a matter of taste; however,
+as you ask my opinion, I should say not quite so beautiful as himself.'
+
+{picture:'There 'ere woman is Tawno Chikno's wife!': page115.jpg}
+
+We had now arrived at a small valley between two hills, or downs, the
+sides of which were covered with furze; in the midst of this valley were
+various carts and low tents forming a rude kind of encampment; several
+dark children were playing about, who took no manner of notice of us.  As
+we passed one of the tents, however, a canvas screen was lifted up, and a
+woman supported upon a crutch hobbled out.  She was about the middle age,
+and, besides being lame, was bitterly ugly; she was very slovenly
+dressed, and on her swarthy features ill nature was most visibly stamped.
+She did not deign me a look, but, addressing Jasper in a tongue which I
+did not understand, appeared to put some eager questions to him.
+
+'He's coming,' said Jasper, and passed on.  'Poor fellow,' said he to me,
+'he has scarcely been gone an hour, and she's jealous already.  Well,' he
+continued, 'what do you think of her? you have seen her now, and can
+judge for yourself--that 'ere woman is Tawno Chikno's wife!'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII
+
+
+The tent--Pleasant discourse--I am Pharaoh--Shifting for one's self
+--Horse-shoes--This is wonderful--Bless your wisdom--A pretty
+manoeuvre--Ill day to the Romans--My name is Herne--Singular people--An
+original speech--Word-master--Speaking Romanly.
+
+We went to the farthest of the tents, which stood at a slight distance
+from the rest, and which exactly resembled the one which I have described
+on a former occasion; we went in and sat down one on each side of a small
+fire, which was smouldering on the ground, there was no one else in the
+tent but a tall tawny woman of middle age, who was busily knitting.
+'Brother,' said Jasper, 'I wish to hold some pleasant discourse with
+you.'
+
+'As much as you please,' said I, 'provided you can find anything pleasant
+to talk about.'
+
+'Never fear,' said Jasper; 'and first of all we will talk of yourself.
+Where have you been all this long time?'
+
+'Here and there,' said I, 'and far and near, going about with the
+soldiers; but there is no soldiering now, so we have sat down, father and
+family, in the town there.'
+
+'And do you still hunt snakes?' said Jasper.
+
+'No,' said I, 'I have given up that long ago; I do better now: read books
+and learn languages.'
+
+'Well, I am sorry you have given up your snake-hunting, many's the
+strange talk I have had with our people about your snake and yourself,
+and how you frightened my father and mother in the lane.'
+
+'And where are your father and mother?'
+
+'Where I shall never see them, brother; at least, I hope so.'
+
+'Not dead?'
+
+'No, not dead; they are bitchadey pawdel.'
+
+'What's that?'
+
+'Sent across--banished.'
+
+'Ah! I understand; I am sorry for them.  And so you are here alone?'
+
+'Not quite alone, brother.'
+
+'No, not alone; but with the rest--Tawno Chikno takes care of you.'
+
+'Takes care of me, brother!'
+
+'Yes, stands to you in the place of a father--keeps you out of harm's
+way.'
+
+'What do you take me for, brother?'
+
+'For about three years older than myself.'
+
+'Perhaps; but you are of the Gorgios, and I am a Rommany Chal.  Tawno
+Chikno take care of Jasper Petulengro!'
+
+'Is that your name?'
+
+'Don't you like it?'
+
+'Very much, I never heard a sweeter; it is something like what you call
+me.'
+
+'The horse-shoe master and the snake-fellow, I am the first.'
+
+'Who gave you that name?'
+
+'Ask Pharaoh.'
+
+'I would, if he were here, but I do not see him.'
+
+'I am Pharaoh.'
+
+'Then you are a king.'
+
+'Chachipen Pal.'
+
+'I do not understand you.'
+
+'Where are your languages?  You want two things, brother: mother sense,
+and gentle Rommany.'
+
+'What makes you think that I want sense?'
+
+'That, being so old, you can't yet guide yourself!'
+
+'I can read Dante, Jasper.'
+
+'Anan, brother.'
+
+'I can charm snakes, Jasper.'
+
+'I know you can, brother.'
+
+'Yes, and horses too; bring me the most vicious in the land, if I whisper
+he'll be tame.'
+
+'Then the more shame for you--a snake-fellow--a horse-witch--and a lil-
+reader--yet you can't shift for yourself.  I laugh at you, brother!'
+
+'Then you can shift for yourself?'
+
+'For myself and for others, brother.'
+
+'And what does Chikno?'
+
+'Sells me horses, when I bid him.  Those horses on the chong were mine.'
+
+'And has he none of his own?'
+
+'Sometimes he has; but he is not so well off as myself.  When my father
+and mother were bitchadey pawdel, which, to tell you the truth, they were
+for chiving wafodo dloovu, they left me all they had, which was not a
+little, and I became the head of our family, which was not a small one.  I
+was not older than you when that happened; yet our people said they had
+never a better krallis to contrive and plan for them, and to keep them in
+order.  And this is so well known that many Rommany Chals, not of our
+family, come and join themselves to us, living with us for a time, in
+order to better themselves, more especially those of the poorer sort, who
+have little of their own.  Tawno is one of these.'
+
+'Is that fine fellow poor?'
+
+'One of the poorest, brother.  Handsome as he is, he has not a horse of
+his own to ride on.  Perhaps we may put it down to his wife, who cannot
+move about, being a cripple, as you saw.'
+
+'And you are what is called a Gypsy King?'
+
+'Ay, ay; a Rommany Kral.'
+
+'Are there other kings?'
+
+'Those who call themselves so; but the true Pharaoh is Petulengro.'
+
+'Did Pharaoh make horse-shoes?'
+
+'The first who ever did, brother.'
+
+'Pharaoh lived in Egypt.'
+
+'So did we once, brother.'
+
+'And you left it?'
+
+'My fathers did, brother.'
+
+'And why did they come here?'
+
+'They had their reasons, brother.'
+
+'And you are not English?'
+
+'We are not gorgios.'
+
+'And you have a language of your own?'
+
+'Avali.'
+
+'This is wonderful.'
+
+'Ha, ha!' cried the woman, who had hitherto sat knitting, at the farther
+end of the tent, without saying a word, though not inattentive to our
+conversation, as I could perceive by certain glances which she
+occasionally cast upon us both.  'Ha, ha!' she screamed, fixing upon me
+two eyes, which shone like burning coals, and which were filled with an
+expression both of scorn and malignity, 'It is wonderful, is it, that we
+should have a language of our own?  What, you grudge the poor people the
+speech they talk among themselves?  That's just like you gorgios; you
+would have everybody stupid, single-tongued idiots, like yourselves.  We
+are taken before the Poknees of the gav, myself and sister, to give an
+account of ourselves.  So I says to my sister's little boy, speaking
+Rommany, I says to the little boy who is with us, Run to my son Jasper,
+and the rest, and tell them to be off, there are hawks abroad.  So the
+Poknees questions us, and lets us go, not being able to make anything of
+us; but, as we are going, he calls us back.  "Good woman," says the
+Poknees, "what was that I heard you say just now to the little boy?"  "I
+was telling him, your worship, to go and see the time of day, and to save
+trouble, I said it in our language."  "Where did you get that language?"
+says the Poknees.  "'Tis our own language, sir," I tells him, "we did not
+steal it."  "Shall I tell you what it is, my good woman?" says the
+Poknees.  "I would thank you, sir," says I, "for 'tis often we are asked
+about it."  "Well, then," says the Poknees, "it is no language at all,
+merely a made-up gibberish."  "Oh, bless your wisdom," says I, with a
+curtsey, "you can tell us what our language is, without understanding
+it!"  Another time we meet a parson.  "Good woman," says he, "what's that
+you are talking?  Is it broken language?"  "Of course, your reverence,"
+says I, "we are broken people; give a shilling, your reverence, to the
+poor broken woman."  Oh, these gorgios! they grudge us our very
+language!'
+
+'She called you her son, Jasper?'
+
+'I am her son, brother.'
+
+'I thought you said your parents were--'
+
+'Bitchadey pawdel; you thought right, brother.  This is my wife's
+mother.'
+
+'Then you are married, Jasper?'
+
+'Ay, truly; I am husband and father.  You will see wife and chabo anon.'
+
+'Where are they now?'
+
+'In the gav, penning dukkerin.'
+
+'We were talking of language, Jasper?'
+
+'True, brother.'
+
+'Yours must be a rum one?'
+
+''Tis called Rommany.'
+
+'I would gladly know it.'
+
+'You need it sorely.'
+
+'Would you teach it me?'
+
+'None sooner.'
+
+'Suppose we begin now?'
+
+'Suppose we do, brother.'
+
+'Not whilst I am here,' said the woman, flinging her knitting down, and
+starting upon her feet; 'not whilst I am here shall this gorgio learn
+Rommany.  A pretty manoeuvre, truly; and what would be the end of it?  I
+goes to the farming ker with my sister, to tell a fortune, and earn a few
+sixpences for the chabes.  I sees a jolly pig in the yard, and I says to
+my sister, speaking Rommany, "Do so and so," says I; which the farming
+man hearing, asks what we are talking about. "Nothing at all, master,"
+says I; "something about the weather"; when who should start up from
+behind a pale, where he has been listening, but this ugly gorgio, crying
+out, "They are after poisoning your pigs, neighbour!" so that we are glad
+to run, I and my sister, with perhaps the farm-engro shouting after us.
+Says my sister to me, when we have got fairly off, "How came that ugly
+one to know what you said to me?"  Whereupon I answers, "It all comes of
+my son Jasper, who brings the gorgio to our fire, and must needs be
+teaching him."  "Who was fool there?" says my sister.  "Who, indeed, but
+my son Jasper," I answers.  And here should I be a greater fool to sit
+still and suffer it; which I will not do.  I do not like the look of him;
+he looks over-gorgeous.  An ill day to the Romans when he masters
+Rommany; and, when I says that, I pens a true dukkerin.'
+
+'What do you call God, Jasper?'
+
+'You had better be jawing,' said the woman, raising her voice to a
+terrible scream; 'you had better be moving off, my gorgio; hang you for a
+keen one, sitting there by the fire, and stealing my language before my
+face.  Do you know whom you have to deal with?  Do you know that I am
+dangerous?  My name is Herne, and I comes of the hairy ones!'
+
+And a hairy one she looked!  She wore her hair clubbed upon her head,
+fastened with many strings and ligatures; but now, tearing these off, her
+locks, originally jet black, but now partially grizzled with age, fell
+down on every side of her, covering her face and back as far down as her
+knees.  No she-bear of Lapland ever looked more fierce and hairy than did
+that woman, as standing in the open part of the tent, with her head bent
+down, and her shoulders drawn up, seemingly about to precipitate herself
+upon me, she repeated, again and again,--
+
+'My name is Herne, and I comes of the hairy ones!--'
+
+'I call God Duvel, brother.'
+
+'It sounds very like Devil.'
+
+'It doth, brother, it doth.'
+
+'And what do you call divine, I mean godly?'
+
+'Oh!  I call that duvelskoe.'
+
+'I am thinking of something, Jasper.'
+
+'What are you thinking of, brother?'
+
+'Would it not be a rum thing if divine and devilish were originally one
+and the same word?'
+
+'It would, brother, it would--'
+
+. . .
+
+From this time I had frequent interviews with Jasper, sometimes in his
+tent, sometimes on the heath, about which we would roam for hours,
+discoursing on various matters.  Sometimes, mounted on one of his horses,
+of which he had several, I would accompany him to various fairs and
+markets in the neighbourhood, to which he went on his own affairs, or
+those of his tribe.  I soon found that I had become acquainted with a
+most singular people, whose habits and pursuits awakened within me the
+highest interest.  Of all connected with them, however, their language
+was doubtless that which exercised the greatest influence over my
+imagination.  I had at first some suspicion that it would prove a mere
+made-up gibberish; but I was soon undeceived.  Broken, corrupted, and
+half in ruins as it was, it was not long before I found that it was an
+original speech, far more so, indeed, than one or two others of high name
+and celebrity, which, up to that time, I had been in the habit of
+regarding with respect and veneration.  Indeed many obscure points
+connected with the vocabulary of these languages, and to which neither
+classic nor modern lore afforded any clue, I thought I could now clear up
+by means of this strange broken tongue, spoken by people who dwelt
+amongst thickets and furze bushes, in tents as tawny as their faces, and
+whom the generality of mankind designated, and with much semblance of
+justice, as thieves and vagabonds.  But where did this speech come from,
+and who were they who spoke it?  These were questions which I could not
+solve, and which Jasper himself, when pressed, confessed his inability to
+answer.  'But, whoever we be, brother,' said he, 'we are an old people,
+and not what folks in general imagine, broken gorgios; and, if we are not
+Egyptians, we are at any rate Rommany Chals!'
+
+{picture:'My name is Herne, and I comes of the hairy ones!': page122.jpg}
+
+'Rommany Chals!  I should not wonder after all,' said I, 'that these
+people had something to do with the founding of Rome.  Rome, it is said,
+was built by vagabonds, who knows but that some tribe of the kind settled
+down thereabouts, and called the town which they built after their name;
+but whence did they come originally? ah! there is the difficulty.'
+
+But abandoning these questions, which at that time were far too profound
+for me, I went on studying the language, and at the same time the
+characters and manners of these strange people.  My rapid progress in the
+former astonished, while it delighted, Jasper.  'We'll no longer call you
+Sap-engro, brother,' said he; but rather Lav-engro, which in the language
+of the gorgios meaneth Word-master.'  'Nay, brother,' said Tawno Chikno,
+with whom I had become very intimate, 'you had better call him
+Cooro-mengro, I have put on _the gloves_ with him, and find him a pure
+fist-master; I like him for that, for I am a Cooro-mengro myself, and was
+born at Brummagem.'
+
+'I likes him for his modesty,' said Mrs. Chikno; 'I never hears any ill
+words come from his mouth, but, on the contrary, much sweet language.  His
+talk is golden, and he has taught my eldest to say his prayers in
+Rommany, which my rover had never the grace to do.'  'He is the pal of my
+rom,' said Mrs. Petulengro, who was a very handsome woman, 'and therefore
+I likes him, and not the less for his being a rye; folks calls me high-
+minded, and perhaps I have reason to be so; before I married Pharaoh I
+had an offer from a lord--I likes the young rye, and, if he chooses to
+follow us, he shall have my sister.  What say you, mother? should not the
+young rye have my sister Ursula?'
+
+{picture:'To gain a bad brother, ye have lost a good mother.':
+page124.jpg}
+
+'I am going to my people,' said Mrs. Herne, placing a bundle upon a
+donkey, which was her own peculiar property; 'I am going to Yorkshire,
+for I can stand this no longer.  You say you like him: in that we
+differs; I hates the gorgio, and would like, speaking Romanly, to mix a
+little poison with his waters.  And now go to Lundra, my children, I goes
+to Yorkshire.  Take my blessing with ye, and a little bit of a gillie to
+cheer your hearts with when ye are weary.  In all kinds of weather have
+we lived together; but now we are parted.  I goes broken-hearted--I can't
+keep you company; ye are no longer Rommany.  To gain a bad brother, ye
+have lost a good mother.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII
+
+
+What profession?--Not fitted for a Churchman--Erratic course--The bitter
+draught--Principle of woe--Thou wouldst be joyous--What ails you?--Poor
+child of clay.
+
+So the gypsies departed; Mrs. Herne to Yorkshire, and the rest to London:
+as for myself, I continued in the house of my parents, passing my time in
+much the same manner as I have already described, principally in
+philological pursuits; but I was now sixteen, and it was highly necessary
+that I should adopt some profession, unless I intended to fritter away my
+existence, and to be a useless burden to those who had given me birth;
+but what profession was I to choose? there being none in the wide world
+perhaps for which I was suited; nor was there any one for which I felt
+any decided inclination, though perhaps there existed within me a lurking
+penchant for the profession of arms, which was natural enough, as, from
+my earliest infancy, I had been accustomed to military sights and sounds;
+but this profession was then closed, as I have already hinted, and, as I
+believe, it has since continued, to those who, like myself, had no better
+claims to urge than the services of a father.
+
+My father, who, for certain reasons of his own, had no very high opinion
+of the advantages resulting from this career, would have gladly seen me
+enter the Church.  His desire was, however, considerably abated by one or
+two passages of my life, which occurred to his recollection.  He
+particularly dwelt on the unheard-of manner in which I had picked up the
+Irish language, and drew from thence the conclusion that I was not fitted
+by nature to cut a respectable figure at an English university.  'He will
+fly off in a tangent,' said he, 'and, when called upon to exhibit his
+skill in Greek, will be found proficient in Irish; I have observed the
+poor lad attentively, and really do not know what to make of him; but I
+am afraid he will never make a churchman!'  And I have no doubt that my
+excellent father was right, both in his premisses and the conclusion at
+which he arrived.  I had undoubtedly, at one period of my life, forsaken
+Greek for Irish, and the instructions of a learned Protestant divine for
+those of a Papist gossoon, the card-fancying Murtagh; and of late, though
+I kept it a strict secret, I had abandoned in a great measure the study
+of the beautiful Italian, and the recitation of the sonorous terzets of
+the Divine Comedy, in which at one time I took the greatest delight, in
+order to become acquainted with the broken speech, and yet more broken
+songs, of certain houseless wanderers whom I had met at a horse fair.
+Such an erratic course was certainly by no means in consonance with the
+sober and unvarying routine of college study.  And my father, who was a
+man of excellent common sense, displayed it in not pressing me to adopt a
+profession which required qualities of mind which he saw I did not
+possess.
+
+Other professions were talked of, amongst which the law; but now an event
+occurred which had nearly stopped my career, and merged all minor points
+of solicitude in anxiety for my life.  My strength and appetite suddenly
+deserted me, and I began to pine and droop.  Some said that I had
+overgrown myself, and that these were the symptoms of a rapid decline; I
+grew worse and worse, and was soon stretched upon my bed, from which it
+seemed scarcely probable that I should ever more rise, the physicians
+themselves giving but slight hopes of my recovery: as for myself, I made
+up my mind to die, and felt quite resigned.  I was sadly ignorant at that
+time, and, when I thought of death, it appeared to me little else than a
+pleasant sleep, and I wished for sleep, of which I got but little.  It
+was well that I did not die that time, for I repeat that I was sadly
+ignorant of many important things.  I did not die, for somebody coming
+gave me a strange, bitter draught; a decoction, I believe, of a bitter
+root which grows on commons and desolate places: and the person who gave
+it me was an ancient female, a kind of doctress, who had been my nurse in
+my infancy, and who, hearing of my state, had come to see me; so I drank
+the draught, and became a little better, and I continued taking draughts
+made from the bitter root till I manifested symptoms of convalescence.
+
+But how much more quickly does strength desert the human frame than
+return to it!  I had become convalescent, it is true, but my state of
+feebleness was truly pitiable.  I believe it is in that state that the
+most remarkable feature of human physiology frequently exhibits itself.
+Oh, how dare I mention the dark feeling of mysterious dread which comes
+over the mind, and which the lamp of reason, though burning bright the
+while, is unable to dispel!  Art thou, as leeches say, the concomitant of
+disease--the result of shattered nerves?  Nay, rather the principle of
+woe itself, the fountain-head of all sorrow coexistent with man, whose
+influence he feels when yet unborn, and whose workings he testifies with
+his earliest cries, when, 'drowned in tears,' he first beholds the light;
+for, as the sparks fly upward, so is man born to trouble, and woe doth he
+bring with him into the world, even thyself, dark one, terrible one,
+causeless, unbegotten, without a father.  Oh, how unfrequently dost thou
+break down the barriers which divide thee from the poor soul of man, and
+overcast its sunshine with thy gloomy shadow.  In the brightest days of
+prosperity--in the midst of health and wealth--how sentient is the poor
+human creature of thy neighbourhood! how instinctively aware that the
+flood-gates of horror may be cast open, and the dark stream engulf him
+for ever and ever!  Then is it not lawful for man to exclaim, 'Better
+that I had never been born!'  Fool, for thyself thou wast not born, but
+to fulfil the inscrutable decrees of thy Creator; and how dost thou know
+that this dark principle is not, after all, thy best friend; that it is
+not that which tempers the whole mass of thy corruption?  It may be, for
+what thou knowest, the mother of wisdom, and of great works: it is the
+dread of the horror of the night that makes the pilgrim hasten on his
+way.  When thou feelest it nigh, let thy safety word be 'Onward'; if thou
+tarry, thou art overwhelmed.  Courage! build great works--'tis urging
+thee--it is ever nearest the favourites of God--the fool knows little of
+it.  Thou wouldst be joyous, wouldst thou? then be a fool.  What great
+work was ever the result of joy, the puny one?  Who have been the wise
+ones, the mighty ones, the conquering ones of this earth? the joyous?  I
+believe not.  The fool is happy, or comparatively so--certainly the least
+sorrowful, but he is still a fool: and whose notes are sweetest, those of
+the nightingale, or of the silly lark?
+
+'What ails you, my child?' said a mother to her son, as he lay on a couch
+under the influence of the dreadful one; 'what ails you? you seem
+afraid!'
+
+_Boy_.  And so I am; a dreadful fear is upon me.
+
+_Mother_.  But of what?  There is no one can harm you; of what are you
+apprehensive?
+
+_Boy_.  Of nothing that I can express; I know not what I am afraid of,
+but afraid I am.
+
+_Mother_.  Perhaps you see sights and visions; I knew a lady once who was
+continually thinking that she saw an armed man threaten her, but it was
+only an imagination, a phantom of the brain.
+
+_Boy_.  No armed man threatens me; and 'tis not a thing like that would
+cause me any fear.  Did an armed man threaten me, I would get up and
+fight him; weak as I am, I would wish for nothing better, for then,
+perhaps, I should lose this fear; mine is a dread of I know not what, and
+there the horror lies.
+
+_Mother_.  Your forehead is cool, and your speech collected.  Do you know
+where you are?
+
+_Boy_.  I know where I am, and I see things just as they are; you are
+beside me, and upon the table there is a book which was written by a
+Florentine; all this I see, and that there is no ground for being afraid.
+I am, moreover, quite cool, and feel no pain--but, but--
+
+And then there was a burst of 'gemiti, sospiri ed alti guai.'  Alas,
+alas, poor child of clay! as the sparks fly upward, so wast thou born to
+sorrow--Onward!
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIX
+
+
+Agreeable delusions--Youth--A profession--Ab Gwilym--Glorious English
+law--There they pass--My dear old master--The deal desk--Language of the
+tents--Where is Morfydd?--Go to--only once.
+
+It has been said by this or that writer, I scarcely know by whom, that,
+in proportion as we grow old, and our time becomes short, the swifter
+does it pass, until at last, as we approach the borders of the grave, it
+assumes all the speed and impetuosity of a river about to precipitate
+itself into an abyss; this is doubtless the case, provided we can carry
+to the grave those pleasant thoughts and delusions, which alone render
+life agreeable, and to which even to the very last we would gladly cling;
+but what becomes of the swiftness of time, when the mind sees the vanity
+of human pursuits? which is sure to be the case when its fondest, dearest
+hopes have been blighted at the very moment when the harvest was deemed
+secure.  What becomes from that moment, I repeat, of the shortness of
+time?  I put not the question to those who have never known that trial,
+they are satisfied with themselves and all around them, with what they
+have done, and yet hope to do; some carry their delusions with them to
+the borders of the grave, ay, to the very moment when they fall into it;
+a beautiful golden cloud surrounds them to the last, and such talk of the
+shortness of time: through the medium of that cloud the world has ever
+been a pleasant world to them; their only regret is that they are so soon
+to quit it; but oh, ye dear deluded hearts, it is not every one who is so
+fortunate!
+
+To the generality of mankind there is no period like youth.  The
+generality are far from fortunate; but the period of youth, even to the
+least so, offers moments of considerable happiness, for they are not only
+disposed but able to enjoy most things within their reach.  With what
+trifles at that period are we content; the things from which in after-
+life we should turn away in disdain please us then, for we are in the
+midst of a golden cloud, and everything seems decked with a golden hue.
+Never during any portion of my life did time flow on more speedily than
+during the two or three years immediately succeeding the period to which
+we arrived in the preceding chapter: since then it has flagged often
+enough; sometimes it has seemed to stand entirely still; and the reader
+may easily judge how it fares at the present, from the circumstance of my
+taking pen in hand, and endeavouring to write down the passages of my
+life--a last resource with most people.  But at the period to which I
+allude I was just, as I may say, entering upon life; I had adopted a
+profession, and, to keep up my character, simultaneously with that
+profession--the study of a new language.  I speedily became a proficient
+in the one, but ever remained a novice in the other: a novice in the law,
+but a perfect master in the Welsh tongue.
+
+Yes; very pleasant times were those, when within the womb of a lofty deal
+desk, behind which I sat for some eight hours every day, transcribing
+(when I imagined eyes were upon me) documents of every description in
+every possible hand. Blackstone kept company with Ab Gwilym--the polished
+English lawyer of the last century, who wrote long and prosy chapters on
+the rights of things--with a certain wild Welshman, who some four hundred
+years before that time indited immortal cowydds and odes to the wives of
+Cambrian chieftains--more particularly to one Morfydd, the wife of a
+certain hunchbacked dignitary called by the poet facetiously Bwa
+Bach--generally terminating with the modest request of a little private
+parlance beneath the greenwood bough, with no other witness than the eos,
+or nightingale, a request which, if the poet himself may be believed,
+rather a doubtful point, was seldom, very seldom, denied.  And by what
+strange chance had Ab Gwilym and Blackstone, two personages so
+exceedingly different, been thus brought together?  From what the reader
+already knows of me, he may be quite prepared to find me reading the
+former; but what could have induced me to take up Blackstone, or rather
+the law?
+
+I have ever loved to be as explicit as possible; on which account,
+perhaps, I never attained to any proficiency in the law, the essence of
+which is said to be ambiguity; most questions may be answered in a few
+words, and this among the rest, though connected with the law.  My
+parents deemed it necessary that I should adopt some profession, they
+named the law; the law was as agreeable to me as any other profession
+within my reach, so I adopted the law, and the consequence was, that
+Blackstone, probably for the first time, found himself in company with Ab
+Gwilym.  By adopting the law I had not ceased to be Lavengro.
+
+So I sat behind a desk many hours in the day, ostensibly engaged in
+transcribing documents of various kinds; the scene of my labours was a
+strange old house, occupying one side of a long and narrow court, into
+which, however, the greater number of the windows looked not, but into an
+extensive garden, filled with fruit trees, in the rear of a large,
+handsome house, belonging to a highly respectable gentleman, who,
+moyennant un douceur considerable, had consented to instruct my father's
+youngest son in the mysteries of glorious English law.  Ah! would that I
+could describe the good gentleman in the manner which he deserves; he has
+long since sunk to his place in a respectable vault, in the aisle of a
+very respectable church, whilst an exceedingly respectable marble slab
+against the neighbouring wall tells on a Sunday some eye wandering from
+its prayer-book that his dust lies below; to secure such respectabilities
+in death, he passed a most respectable life.  Let no one sneer, he
+accomplished much; his life was peaceful, so was his death.  Are these
+trifles?  I wish I could describe him, for I loved the man, and with
+reason, for he was ever kind to me, to whom kindness has not always been
+shown; and he was, moreover, a choice specimen of a class which no longer
+exists--a gentleman lawyer of the old school.  I would fain describe him,
+but figures with which he has nought to do press forward and keep him
+from my mind's eye; there they pass, Spaniard and Moor, Gypsy, Turk, and
+livid Jew.  But who is that? what that thick pursy man in the loose,
+snuff-coloured greatcoat, with the white stockings, drab breeches, and
+silver buckles on his shoes; that man with the bull neck, and singular
+head, immense in the lower part, especially about the jaws, but tapering
+upward like a pear; the man with the bushy brows, small gray eyes replete
+with catlike expression, whose grizzled hair is cut close, and whose ear-
+lobes are pierced with small golden rings?  Oh! that is not my dear old
+master, but a widely different personage.  Bon jour, Monsieur Vidocq!
+expressions de ma part a Monsieur Le Baron Taylor.  But here he comes at
+last, my veritable old master!
+
+A more respectable-looking individual was never seen; he really looked
+what he was, a gentleman of the law--there was nothing of the pettifogger
+about him: somewhat under the middle size, and somewhat rotund in person,
+he was always dressed in a full suit of black, never worn long enough to
+become threadbare.  His face was rubicund, and not without keenness; but
+the most remarkable thing about him was the crown of his head, which was
+bald, and shone like polished ivory, nothing more white, smooth, and
+lustrous.  Some people have said that he wore false calves, probably
+because his black silk stockings never exhibited a wrinkle; they might
+just as well have said that he waddled, because his shoes creaked; for
+these last, which were always without a speck, and polished as his crown,
+though of a different hue, did creak, as he walked rather slowly.  I
+cannot say that I ever saw him walk fast.
+
+He had a handsome practice, and might have died a very rich man, much
+richer than he did, had he not been in the habit of giving rather
+expensive dinners to certain great people, who gave him nothing in return
+except their company; I could never discover his reasons for doing so, as
+he always appeared to me a remarkably quiet man, by nature averse to
+noise and bustle; but in all dispositions there are anomalies: I have
+already said that he lived in a handsome house, and I may as well here
+add that he had a very handsome wife, who both dressed and talked
+exceedingly well.
+
+So I sat behind the deal desk, engaged in copying documents of various
+kinds; and in the apartment in which I sat, and in the adjoining ones,
+there were others, some of whom likewise copied documents, while some
+were engaged in the yet more difficult task of drawing them up; and some
+of these, sons of nobody, were paid for the work they did, whilst others,
+like myself, sons of somebody, paid for being permitted to work, which,
+as our principal observed, was but reasonable, forasmuch as we not
+unfrequently utterly spoiled the greater part of the work intrusted to
+our hands.
+
+There was one part of the day when I generally found myself quite alone,
+I mean at the hour when the rest went home to their principal meal; I,
+being the youngest, was left to take care of the premises, to answer the
+bell, and so forth, till relieved, which was seldom before the expiration
+of an hour and a half, when I myself went home; this period, however, was
+anything but disagreeable to me, for it was then that I did what best
+pleased me, and, leaving off copying the documents, I sometimes indulged
+in a fit of musing, my chin resting on both my hands, and my elbows
+planted on the desk; or, opening the desk aforesaid, I would take out one
+of the books contained within it, and the book which I took out was
+almost invariably, not Blackstone, but Ab Gwilym.
+
+Ah, that Ab Gwilym!  I am much indebted to him, and it were ungrateful on
+my part not to devote a few lines to him and his songs in this my
+history.  Start not, reader, I am not going to trouble you with a
+poetical dissertation; no, no; I know my duty too well to introduce
+anything of the kind; but I, who imagine I know several things, and
+amongst others the workings of your mind at this moment, have an idea
+that you are anxious to learn a little, a very little, more about Ab
+Gwilym than I have hitherto told you, the two or three words that I have
+dropped having awakened within you a languid kind of curiosity.  I have
+no hesitation in saying that he makes one of the some half-dozen really
+great poets whose verses, in whatever language they wrote, exist at the
+present day, and are more or less known.  It matters little how I first
+became acquainted with the writings of this man, and how the short thick
+volume, stuffed full with his immortal imaginings, first came into my
+hands.  I was studying Welsh, and I fell in with Ab Gwilym by no very
+strange chance.  But, before I say more about Ab Gwilym, I must be
+permitted--I really must--to say a word or two about the language in
+which he wrote, that same 'Sweet Welsh.'  If I remember right, I found
+the language a difficult one; in mastering it, however, I derived
+unexpected assistance from what of Irish remained in my head, and I soon
+found that they were cognate dialects, springing from some old tongue
+which itself, perhaps, had sprung from one much older.  And here I cannot
+help observing cursorily that I every now and then, whilst studying this
+Welsh, generally supposed to be the original tongue of Britain,
+encountered words which, according to the lexicographers, were venerable
+words highly expressive, showing the wonderful power and originality of
+the Welsh, in which, however, they were no longer used in common
+discourse, but were relics, precious relics, of the first speech of
+Britain, perhaps of the world; with which words, however, I was already
+well acquainted, and which I had picked up, not in learned books, classic
+books, and in tongues of old renown, but whilst listening to Mr.
+Petulengro and Tawno Chikno talking over their everyday affairs in the
+language of the tents; which circumstance did not fail to give rise to
+deep reflection in those moments when, planting my elbows on the deal
+desk, I rested my chin upon my hands.  But it is probable that I should
+have abandoned the pursuit of the Welsh language, after obtaining a very
+superficial acquaintance with it, had it not been for Ab Gwilym.
+
+A strange songster was that who, pretending to be captivated by every
+woman he saw, was, in reality, in love with nature alone--wild,
+beautiful, solitary nature--her mountains and cascades, her forests and
+streams, her birds, fishes, and wild animals.  Go to, Ab Gwilym, with thy
+pseudo-amatory odes, to Morfydd, or this or that other lady, fair or
+ugly; little didst thou care for any of them, Dame Nature was thy love,
+however thou mayest seek to disguise the truth.  Yes, yes, send thy love-
+message to Morfydd, the fair wanton.  By whom dost thou send it, I would
+know? by the salmon forsooth, which haunts the rushing stream! the
+glorious salmon which bounds and gambols in the flashing water, and whose
+ways and circumstances thou so well describest--see, there he hurries
+upwards through the flashing water.  Halloo! what a glimpse of glory--but
+where is Morfydd the while?  What, another message to the wife of Bwa
+Bach?  Ay, truly; and by whom?--the wind! the swift wind, the rider of
+the world, whose course is not to be stayed; who gallops o'er the
+mountain, and, when he comes to broadest river, asks neither for boat nor
+ferry; who has described the wind so well--his speed and power?  But
+where is Morfydd?  And now thou art awaiting Morfydd, the wanton, the
+wife of the Bwa Bach; thou art awaiting her beneath the tall trees,
+amidst the underwood; but she comes not; no Morfydd is there.  Quite
+right, Ab Gwilym; what wantest thou with Morfydd? But another form is
+nigh at hand, that of red Reynard, who, seated upon his chine at the
+mouth of his cave, looks very composedly at thee; thou startest, bendest
+thy bow, thy cross-bow, intending to hit Reynard with the bolt just about
+the jaw; but the bow breaks, Reynard barks and disappears into his cave,
+which by thine own account reaches hell--and then thou ravest at the
+misfortune of thy bow, and the non-appearance of Morfydd, and abusest
+Reynard.  Go to, thou carest neither for thy bow nor for Morfydd, thou
+merely seekest an opportunity to speak of Reynard; and who has described
+him like thee? the brute with the sharp shrill cry, the black reverse of
+melody, whose face sometimes wears a smile like the devil's in the
+Evangile.  But now thou art actually with Morfydd; yes, she has stolen
+from the dwelling of the Bwa Bach and has met thee beneath those
+rocks--she is actually with thee, Ab Gwilym; but she is not long with
+thee, for a storm comes on, and thunder shatters the rocks--Morfydd
+flees!  Quite right, Ab Gwilym; thou hadst no need of her, a better theme
+for song is the voice of the Lord--the rock-shatterer--than the frail
+wife of the Bwa Bach.  Go to, Ab Gwilym, thou wast a wiser and a better
+man than thou wouldst fain have had people believe.
+
+But enough of thee and thy songs!  Those times passed rapidly; with Ab
+Gwilym in my hand, I was in the midst of enchanted ground, in which I
+experienced sensations akin to those I had felt of yore whilst spelling
+my way through the wonderful book--the delight of my childhood.  I say
+akin, for perhaps only once in our lives do we experience unmixed wonder
+and delight; and these I had already known.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XX
+
+
+Silver gray--Good word for everybody--A remarkable youth--Clients--Grades
+in society--The archdeacon--Reading the Bible.
+
+'I am afraid that I have not acted very wisely in putting this boy of
+ours to the law,' said my father to my mother, as they sat together one
+summer evening in their little garden, beneath the shade of some tall
+poplars.
+
+Yes, there sat my father in the garden chair which leaned against the
+wall of his quiet home, the haven in which he had sought rest, and,
+praise be to God, found it, after many a year of poorly-requited toil;
+there he sat, with locks of silver gray which set off so nobly his fine
+bold but benevolent face, his faithful consort at his side, and his
+trusty dog at his feet--an eccentric animal of the genuine regimental
+breed, who, born amongst red coats, had not yet become reconciled to
+those of any other hue, barking and tearing at them when they drew near
+the door, but testifying his fond reminiscence of the former by
+hospitable waggings of the tail whenever a uniform made its appearance--at
+present a very unfrequent occurrence.
+
+'I am afraid I have not done right in putting him to the law,' said my
+father, resting his chin upon his gold-headed bamboo cane.
+
+'Why, what makes you think so?' said my mother.
+
+'I have been taking my usual evening walk up the road, with the animal
+here,' said my father; 'and, as I walked along, I overtook the boy's
+master, Mr. S---.  We shook hands, and, after walking a little way
+farther, we turned back together, talking about this and that; the state
+of the country, the weather, and the dog, which he greatly admired; for
+he is a good-natured man, and has a good word for everybody, though the
+dog all but bit him when he attempted to coax his head; after the dog, we
+began talking about the boy; it was myself who introduced that subject: I
+thought it was a good opportunity to learn how he was getting on, so I
+asked what he thought of my son; he hesitated at first, seeming scarcely
+to know what to say; at length he came out with "Oh, a very extraordinary
+youth, a most remarkable youth indeed, captain!"  "Indeed," said I, "I am
+glad to hear it, but I hope you find him steady?"  "Steady, steady," said
+he, "why, yes, he's steady, I cannot say that he is not steady."  "Come,
+come," said I, beginning to be rather uneasy, "I see plainly that you are
+not altogether satisfied with him; I was afraid you would not be, for,
+though he is my own son, I am anything but blind to his imperfections;
+but do tell me what particular fault you have to find with him; and I
+will do my best to make him alter his conduct."  "No fault to find with
+him, captain, I assure you, no fault whatever; the youth is a remarkable
+youth, an extraordinary youth, only--"  As I told you before, Mr. S--- is
+the best-natured man in the world, and it was only with the greatest
+difficulty that I could get him to say a single word to the disadvantage
+of the boy, for whom he seems to entertain a very great regard.  At last
+I forced the truth from him, and grieved I was to hear it; though I must
+confess that I was somewhat prepared for it.  It appears that the lad has
+a total want of discrimination.'
+
+'I don't understand you,' said my mother.
+
+'You can understand nothing that would seem for a moment to impugn the
+conduct of that child.  I am not, however, so blind; want of
+discrimination was the word, and it both sounds well, and is expressive.
+It appears that, since he has been placed where is, he has been guilty of
+the grossest blunders; only the other day, Mr. S--- told me, as he was
+engaged in close conversation with one of his principal clients, the boy
+came to tell him that a person wanted particularly to speak with him;
+and, on going out, he found a lamentable figure with one eye, who came to
+ask for charity; whom, nevertheless, the lad had ushered into a private
+room, and installed in an arm-chair, like a justice of the peace, instead
+of telling him to go about his business--now what did that show, but a
+total want of discrimination?'
+
+'I wish we may never have anything worse to reproach him with,' said my
+mother.
+
+'I don't know what worse we could reproach him with,' said my father; 'I
+mean of course as far as his profession is concerned; discrimination is
+the very keystone; if he treated all people alike, he would soon become a
+beggar himself; there are grades in society as well as in the army; and
+according to those grades we should fashion our behaviour, else there
+would instantly be an end of all order and discipline.  I am afraid that
+the child is too condescending to his inferiors, whilst to his superiors
+he is apt to be unbending enough; I don't believe that would do in the
+world; I am sure it would not in the army.  He told me another anecdote
+with respect to his behaviour, which shocked me more than the other had
+done.  It appears that his wife, who by the bye, is a very fine woman,
+and highly fashionable, gave him permission to ask the boy to tea one
+evening, for she is herself rather partial to the lad; there had been a
+great dinner party there that day, and there were a great many
+fashionable people, so the boy went and behaved very well and modestly
+for some time, and was rather noticed, till, unluckily, a very great
+gentleman, an archdeacon I think, put some questions to him, and, finding
+that he understood the languages, began talking to him about the
+classics.  What do you think? the boy had the impertinence to say that
+the classics were much overvalued, and amongst other things that some
+horrid fellow or other, some Welshman I think (thank God it was not an
+Irishman), was a better poet than Ovid; the company were of course
+horrified; the archdeacon, who is seventy years of age, and has seven
+thousand a year, took snuff and turned away.  Mrs. S--- turned up her
+eyes, Mr. S---, however, told me with his usual good-nature (I suppose to
+spare my feelings) that he rather enjoyed the thing, and thought it a
+capital joke.'
+
+'I think so too,' said my mother.
+
+'I do not,' said my father; 'that a boy of his years should entertain an
+opinion of his own--I mean one which militates against all established
+authority--is astounding; as well might a raw recruit pretend to offer an
+unfavourable opinion on the manual and platoon exercise; the idea is
+preposterous; the lad is too independent by half.  I never yet knew one
+of an independent spirit get on in the army, the secret of success in the
+army is the spirit of subordination.'
+
+'Which is a poor spirit after all,' said my mother; 'but the child is not
+in the army.'
+
+'And it is well for him that he is not,' said my father; 'but you do not
+talk wisely, the world is a field of battle, and he who leaves the ranks,
+what can he expect but to be cut down?  I call his present behaviour
+leaving the ranks, and going vapouring about without orders; his only
+chance lies in falling in again as quick as possible; does he think he
+can carry the day by himself? an opinion of his own at these years--I
+confess I am exceedingly uneasy about the lad.'
+
+'You make me uneasy too,' said my mother; 'but I really think you are too
+hard upon the child; he is not a bad child, after all, though not,
+perhaps, all you could wish him; he is always ready to read the Bible.
+Let us go in; he is in the room above us; at least he was two hours ago,
+I left him there bending over his books; I wonder what he has been doing
+all this time, it is now getting late; let us go in, and he shall read to
+us.'
+
+'I am getting old,' said my father; 'and I love to hear the Bible read to
+me, for my own sight is something dim; yet I do not wish the child to
+read to me this night, I cannot so soon forget what I have heard; but I
+hear my eldest son's voice, he is now entering the gate; he shall read
+the Bible to us this night.  What say you?'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXI
+
+
+The eldest son--Saying of wild Finland--The critical time--Vaunting
+polls--One thing wanted--A father's blessing--Miracle of art--The Pope's
+house--Young enthusiast--Pictures of England--Persist and wrestle--The
+little dark man.
+
+The eldest son!  The regard and affection which my father entertained for
+his first-born were natural enough, and appeared to none more so than
+myself, who cherished the same feelings towards him.  What he was as a
+boy the reader already knows, for the reader has seen him as a boy; fain
+would I describe him at the time of which I am now speaking, when he had
+attained the verge of manhood, but the pen fails me, and I attempt not
+the task; and yet it ought to be an easy one, for how frequently does his
+form visit my mind's eye in slumber and in wakefulness, in the light of
+day and in the night watches; but last night I saw him in his beauty and
+his strength; he was about to speak, and my ear was on the stretch, when
+at once I awoke, and there was I alone, and the night storm was howling
+amidst the branches of the pines which surround my lonely dwelling:
+'Listen to the moaning of the pine, at whose root thy hut is fastened,'--a
+saying that, of wild Finland, in which there is wisdom; I listened and
+thought of life and death. . . . Of all human beings that I have ever
+known, that elder brother was the most frank and generous, ay, and the
+quickest and readiest, and the best adapted to do a great thing needful
+at the critical time, when the delay of a moment would be fatal.  I have
+known him dash from a steep bank into a stream in his full dress, and
+pull out a man who was drowning; yet there were twenty others bathing in
+the water, who might have saved him by putting out a hand, without
+inconvenience to themselves, which, however, they did not do, but stared
+with stupid surprise at the drowning one's struggles.  Yes, whilst some
+shouted from the bank to those in the water to save the drowning one, and
+those in the water did nothing, my brother neither shouted nor stood
+still, but dashed from the bank and did the one thing needful, which,
+under such circumstances, not one man in a million would have done.  Now,
+who can wonder that a brave old man should love a son like this, and
+prefer him to any other?
+
+'My boy, my own boy, you are the very image of myself, the day I took off
+my coat in the park to fight Big Ben,' said my father, on meeting his son
+wet and dripping, immediately after his bold feat.  And who cannot excuse
+the honest pride of the old man--the stout old man?
+
+Ay, old man, that son was worthy of thee, and thou wast worthy of such a
+son; a noble specimen wast thou of those strong single-minded Englishmen,
+who, without making a parade either of religion or loyalty, feared God
+and honoured their king, and were not particularly friendly to the
+French, whose vaunting polls they occasionally broke, as at Minden and at
+Malplaquet, to the confusion vast of the eternal foes of the English
+land.  I, who was so little like thee that thou understoodst me not, and
+in whom with justice thou didst feel so little pride, had yet perception
+enough to see all thy worth, and to feel it an honour to be able to call
+myself thy son; and if at some no distant time, when the foreign enemy
+ventures to insult our shore, I be permitted to break some vaunting poll,
+it will be a triumph to me to think that, if thou hadst lived, thou
+wouldst have hailed the deed, and mightest yet discover some distant
+resemblance to thyself, the day when thou didst all but vanquish the
+mighty Brain.
+
+I have already spoken of my brother's taste for painting, and the
+progress he had made in that beautiful art.  It is probable that, if
+circumstances had not eventually diverted his mind from the pursuit, he
+would have attained excellence, and left behind him some enduring
+monument of his powers, for he had an imagination to conceive, and that
+yet rarer endowment, a hand capable of giving life, body, and reality to
+the conceptions of his mind; perhaps he wanted one thing, the want of
+which is but too often fatal to the sons of genius, and without which
+genius is little more than a splendid toy in the hands of the
+possessor--perseverance, dogged perseverance, in his proper calling;
+otherwise, though the grave had closed over him, he might still be living
+in the admiration of his fellow-creatures.  O ye gifted ones, follow your
+calling, for, however various your talents may be, ye can have but one
+calling capable of leading ye to eminence and renown; follow resolutely
+the one straight path before you, it is that of your good angel, let
+neither obstacles nor temptations induce ye to leave it; bound along if
+you can; if not, on hands and knees follow it, perish in it, if needful;
+but ye need not fear that; no one ever yet died in the true path of his
+calling before he had attained the pinnacle.  Turn into other paths, and
+for a momentary advantage or gratification ye have sold your inheritance,
+your immortality.  Ye will never be heard of after death.
+
+'My father has given me a hundred and fifty pounds,' said my brother to
+me one morning, 'and something which is better--his blessing.  I am going
+to leave you.'
+
+'And where are you going?'
+
+'Where? to the great city; to London, to be sure.'
+
+'I should like to go with you.'
+
+'Pooh,' said my brother, 'what should you do there?  But don't be
+discouraged, I daresay a time will come when you too will go to London.'
+
+And, sure enough, so it did, and all but too soon.
+
+'And what do you purpose doing there?' I demanded.
+
+'Oh, I go to improve myself in art, to place myself under some master of
+high name, at least I hope to do so eventually.  I have, however, a plan
+in my head, which I should wish first to execute; indeed, I do not think
+I can rest till I have done so; every one talks so much about Italy, and
+the wondrous artists which it has produced, and the wondrous pictures
+which are to be found there; now I wish to see Italy, or rather Rome, the
+great city, for I am told that in a certain room there is contained the
+grand miracle of art.'
+
+'And what do you call it?'
+
+'The Transfiguration, painted by one Rafael, and it is said to be the
+greatest work of the greatest painter whom the world has ever known.  I
+suppose it is because everybody says so, that I have such a strange
+desire to see it.  I have already made myself well acquainted with its
+locality, and think that I could almost find my way to it blindfold.  When
+I have crossed the Tiber, which, as you are aware, runs through Rome, I
+must presently turn to the right, up a rather shabby street, which
+communicates with a large square, the farther end of which is entirely
+occupied by the front of an immense church, with a dome which ascends
+almost to the clouds, and this church they call St. Peter's.'
+
+'Ay, ay,' said I, 'I have read about that in Keysler's Travels.'
+
+'Before the church, in the square, are two fountains, one on either side,
+casting up water in showers; between them, in the midst, is an obelisk,
+brought from Egypt, and covered with mysterious writing; on your right
+rises an edifice, not beautiful nor grand, but huge and bulky, where
+lives a strange kind of priest whom men call the Pope, a very horrible
+old individual, who would fain keep Christ in leading strings, calls the
+Virgin Mary the Queen of Heaven, and himself God's Lieutenant-General
+upon earth.'
+
+'Ay, ay,' said I, 'I have read of him in Foxe's _Book of Martyrs_.'
+
+'Well, I do not go straight forward up the flight of steps conducting
+into the church, but I turn to the right, and, passing under the piazza,
+find myself in a court of the huge bulky house; and then ascend various
+staircases, and pass along various corridors and galleries, all of which
+I could describe to you, though I have never seen them; at last a door is
+unlocked, and we enter a room rather high, but not particularly large,
+communicating with another room, into which, however, I do not go, though
+there are noble things in that second room--immortal things, by immortal
+artists; amongst others, a grand piece of Correggio; I do not enter it,
+for the grand picture of the world is not there; but I stand still
+immediately on entering the first room, and I look straight before me,
+neither to the right nor left, though there are noble things both on the
+right and left, for immediately before me at the farther end, hanging
+against the wall, is a picture which arrests me, and I can see nothing
+else, for that picture at the farther end hanging against the wall is the
+picture of the world. . . .'
+
+Yes, go thy way, young enthusiast, and, whether to London town or to old
+Rome, may success attend thee; yet strange fears assail me and misgivings
+on thy account.  Thou canst not rest, thou say'st, till thou hast seen
+the picture in the chamber at old Rome hanging over against the wall; ay,
+and thus thou dust exemplify thy weakness--thy strength too, it may
+be--for the one idea, fantastic yet lovely, which now possesses thee,
+could only have originated in a genial and fervent brain.  Well, go, if
+thou must go; yet it perhaps were better for thee to bide in thy native
+land, and there, with fear and trembling, with groanings, with straining
+eyeballs, toil, drudge, slave, till thou hast made excellence thine own;
+thou wilt scarcely acquire it by staring at the picture over against the
+door in the high chamber of old Rome.  Seekest thou inspiration? thou
+needest it not, thou hast it already; and it was never yet found by
+crossing the sea.  What hast thou to do with old Rome, and thou an
+Englishman?  'Did thy blood never glow at the mention of thy native
+land?' as an artist merely?  Yes, I trow, and with reason, for thy native
+land need not grudge old Rome her 'pictures of the world'; she has
+pictures of her own, 'pictures of England'; and is it a new thing to toss
+up caps and shout--England against the world?  Yes, against the world in
+all, in all; in science and in arms, in minstrel strain, and not less in
+the art 'which enables the hand to deceive the intoxicated soul by means
+of pictures.' {143}  Seek'st models? to Gainsborough and Hogarth turn,
+not names of the world, maybe, but English names--and England against the
+world!  A living master? why, there he comes! thou hast had him long, he
+has long guided thy young hand towards the excellence which is yet far
+from thee, but which thou canst attain if thou shouldst persist and
+wrestle, even as he has done, 'midst gloom and despondency--ay, and even
+contempt; he who now comes up the creaking stair to thy little studio in
+the second floor to inspect thy last effort before thou departest, the
+little stout man whose face is very dark, and whose eye is vivacious;
+that man has attained excellence, destined some day to be acknowledged,
+though not till he is cold, and his mortal part returned to its kindred
+clay.  He has painted, not pictures of the world, but English pictures,
+such as Gainsborough himself might have done; beautiful rural pieces,
+with trees which might well tempt the wild birds to perch upon them, thou
+needest not run to Rome, brother, where lives the old Mariolater, after
+pictures of the world, whilst at home there are pictures of England; nor
+needest thou even go to London, the big city, in search of a master, for
+thou hast one at home in the old East Anglian town who can instruct thee
+whilst thou needest instruction: better stay at home, brother, at least
+for a season, and toil and strive 'midst groanings and despondency till
+thou hast attained excellence even as he has done--the little dark man
+with the brown coat and the top-boots, whose name will one day be
+considered the chief ornament of the old town, and whose works will at no
+distant period rank amongst the proudest pictures of England--and England
+against the world!--thy master, my brother, thy, at present, all too
+little considered master--Crome.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXII
+
+
+Desire for novelty--Lives of the lawless--Countenances--Old yeoman and
+dame--We live near the sea--Uncouth-looking volume--The other
+condition--Draoitheac--A dilemma--The Antinomian--Lodowick
+Muggleton--Almost blind--Anders Vedel.
+
+But to proceed with my own story: I now ceased all at once to take much
+pleasure in the pursuits which formerly interested me, I yawned over Ab
+Gwilym, even as I now in my mind's eye perceive the reader yawning over
+the present pages.  What was the cause of this? Constitutional lassitude,
+or a desire for novelty?  Both it is probable had some influence in the
+matter, but I rather think that the latter feeling was predominant.  The
+parting words of my brother had sunk into my mind.  He had talked of
+travelling in strange regions and seeing strange and wonderful objects,
+and my imagination fell to work, and drew pictures of adventures wild and
+fantastic, and I thought what a fine thing it must be to travel, and I
+wished that my father would give me his blessing, and the same sum that
+he had given my brother, and bid me go forth into the world; always
+forgetting that I had neither talents nor energies at this period which
+would enable me to make any successful figure on its stage.
+
+And then I again sought up the book which had so captivated me in my
+infancy, and I read it through; and I sought up others of a similar
+character, and in seeking for them I met books also of adventure, but by
+no means of a harmless description, lives of wicked and lawless men,
+Murray and Latroon--books of singular power, but of coarse and prurient
+imagination--books at one time highly in vogue; now deservedly forgotten,
+and most difficult to be found.
+
+And when I had gone through these books, what was my state of mind?  I
+had derived entertainment from their perusal, but they left me more
+listless and unsettled than before, and really knew not what to do to
+pass my time.  My philological studies had become distasteful, and I had
+never taken any pleasure in the duties of my profession.  I sat behind my
+desk in a state of torpor, my mind almost as blank as the paper before
+me, on which I rarely traced a line.  It was always a relief to hear the
+bell ring, as it afforded me an opportunity of doing something which I
+was yet capable of doing, to rise and open the door and stare in the
+countenances of the visitors.  All of a sudden I fell to studying
+countenances, and soon flattered myself that I had made considerable
+progress in the science.
+
+'There is no faith in countenances,' said some Roman of old; 'trust
+anything but a person's countenance.'  'Not trust a man's countenance?'
+say some moderns, 'why, it is the only thing in many people that we can
+trust; on which account they keep it most assiduously out of the way.
+Trust not a man's words if you please, or you may come to very erroneous
+conclusions; but at all times place implicit confidence in a man's
+countenance, in which there is no deceit; and of necessity there can be
+none.  If people would but look each other more in the face, we should
+have less cause to complain of the deception of the world; nothing so
+easy as physiognomy nor so useful.'  Somewhat in this latter strain I
+thought at the time of which I am speaking.  I am now older, and, let us
+hope, less presumptuous.  It is true that in the course of my life I have
+scarcely ever had occasion to repent placing confidence in individuals
+whose countenances have prepossessed me in their favour; though to how
+many I may have been unjust, from whose countenances I may have drawn
+unfavourable conclusions, is another matter.
+
+But it had been decreed by that Fate which governs our every action that
+I was soon to return to my old pursuits.  It was written that I should
+not yet cease to be Lav-engro, though I had become, in my own opinion, a
+kind of Lavater.  It is singular enough that my renewed ardour for
+philology seems to have been brought about indirectly by my
+physiognomical researches, in which had I not indulged, the event which I
+am about to relate, as far as connected with myself, might never have
+occurred.  Amongst the various countenances which I admitted during the
+period of my answering the bell, there were two which particularly
+pleased me, and which belonged to an elderly yeoman and his wife, whom
+some little business had brought to our law sanctuary.  I believe they
+experienced from me some kindness and attention, which won the old
+people's hearts.  So, one day, when their little business had been
+brought to a conclusion, and they chanced to be alone with me, who was
+seated as usual behind the deal desk in the outer room, the old man with
+some confusion began to tell me how grateful himself and dame felt for
+the many attentions I had shown them, and how desirous they were to make
+me some remuneration.  'Of course,' said the old man, 'we must be
+cautious what we offer to so fine a young gentleman as yourself; we have,
+however, something we think will just suit the occasion, a strange kind
+of thing which people say is a book, though no one that my dame or myself
+have shown it to can make anything out of it; so as we are told that you
+are a fine young gentleman, who can read all the tongues of the earth and
+stars, as the Bible says, we thought, I and my dame, that it would be
+just the thing you would like and my dame has it now at the bottom of her
+basket.'
+
+'A book!' said I, 'how did you come by it?'
+
+'We live near the sea,' said the old man; 'so near that sometimes our
+thatch is wet with the spray; and it may now be a year ago that there was
+a fearful storm, and a ship was driven ashore during the night, and ere
+the morn was a complete wreck.  When we got up at daylight, there were
+the poor shivering crew at our door; they were foreigners, red-haired
+men, whose speech we did not understand; but we took them in, and warmed
+them, and they remained with us three days; and when they went away they
+left behind them this thing, here it is, part of the contents of a box
+which was washed ashore.'
+
+'And did you learn who they were?'
+
+'Why, yes; they made us understand that they were Danes.'
+
+Danes! thought I, Danes! and instantaneously, huge and grisly, appeared
+to rise up before my vision the skull of the old pirate Dane, even as I
+had seen it of yore in the pent-house of the ancient church to which,
+with my mother and my brother, I had wandered on the memorable summer
+eve.
+
+And now the old man handed me the book; a strange and uncouth-looking
+volume enough.  It was not very large, but instead of the usual covering
+was bound in wood, and was compressed with strong iron clasps.  It was a
+printed book, but the pages were not of paper, but vellum, and the
+characters were black, and resembled those generally termed Gothic.
+
+'It is certainly a curious book,' said I; 'and I should like to have it,
+but I can't think of taking it as a gift, I must give you an equivalent,
+I never take presents from anybody.'
+
+The old man whispered with his dame and chuckled, and then turned his
+face to me, and said, with another chuckle, 'Well, we have agreed about
+the price, but, maybe, you will not consent.'
+
+'I don't know,' said I; 'what do you demand?'
+
+'Why, that you shake me by the hand, and hold out your cheek to my old
+dame, she has taken an affection to you.'
+
+'I shall be very glad to shake you by the hand,' said I, 'but as for the
+other condition, it requires consideration.'
+
+'No consideration at all,' said the old man, with something like a sigh;
+'she thinks you like her son, our only child, that was lost twenty years
+ago in the waves of the North Sea.'
+
+'Oh, that alters the case altogether,' said I, 'and of course I can have
+no objection.'
+
+And now at once I shook off my listlessness, to enable me to do which
+nothing could have happened more opportune than the above event.  The
+Danes, the Danes!  And was I at last to become acquainted, and in so
+singular a manner, with the speech of a people which had as far back as I
+could remember exercised the strongest influence over my imagination, as
+how should they not!--in infancy there was the summer-eve adventure, to
+which I often looked back, and always with a kind of strange interest
+with respect to those to whom such gigantic and wondrous bones could
+belong as I had seen on that occasion; and, more than this, I had been in
+Ireland, and there, under peculiar circumstances, this same interest was
+increased tenfold.  I had mingled much whilst there with the genuine
+Irish--a wild but kind-hearted race, whose conversation was deeply imbued
+with traditionary lore, connected with the early history of their own
+romantic land, and from them I heard enough of the Danes, but nothing
+commonplace, for they never mentioned them but in terms which tallied
+well with my own preconceived ideas.  For at an early period the Danes
+had invaded Ireland, and had subdued it, and, though eventually driven
+out, had left behind them an enduring remembrance in the minds of the
+people, who loved to speak of their strength and their stature, in
+evidence of which they would point to the ancient raths or mounds where
+the old Danes were buried, and where bones of extraordinary size were
+occasionally exhumed.  And as the Danes surpassed other people in
+strength, so, according to my narrators, they also excelled all others in
+wisdom, or rather in Draoitheac, or magic, for they were powerful
+sorcerers, they said, compared with whom the fairy men of the present day
+knew nothing at all, at all; and, amongst other wonderful things, they
+knew how to make strong beer from the heather that grows upon the bogs.
+Little wonder if the interest, the mysterious interest, which I had early
+felt about the Danes, was increased tenfold by my sojourn in Ireland.
+
+And now I had in my possession a Danish book, which, from its appearance,
+might be supposed to have belonged to the very old Danes indeed; but how
+was I to turn it to any account?  I had the book, it is true, but I did
+not understand the language, and how was I to overcome that difficulty?
+hardly by poring over the book; yet I did pore over the book, daily and
+nightly, till my eyes were dim, and it appeared to me that every now and
+then I encountered words which I understood--English words, though
+strangely disguised; and I said to myself, Courage!  English and Danish
+are cognate dialects, a time will come when I shall understand this
+Danish; and then I pored over the book again, but with all my poring I
+could not understand it; and then I became angry, and I bit my lips till
+the blood came; and I occasionally tore a handful from my hair, and flung
+it upon the floor, but that did not mend the matter, for still I did not
+understand the book, which, however, I began to see was written in
+rhyme--a circumstance rather difficult to discover at first, the
+arrangement of the lines not differing from that which is employed in
+prose; and its being written in rhyme made me only the more eager to
+understand it.
+
+But I toiled in vain, for I had neither grammar nor dictionary of the
+language; and when I sought for them could procure neither; and I was
+much dispirited, till suddenly a bright thought came into my head, and I
+said, although I cannot obtain a dictionary or grammar, I can perhaps
+obtain a Bible in this language, and if I can procure a Bible, I can
+learn the language, for the Bible in every tongue contains the same
+thing, and I have only to compare the words of the Danish Bible with
+those of the English, and, if I persevere, I shall in time acquire the
+language of the Danes; and I was pleased with the thought, which I
+considered to be a bright one, and I no longer bit my lips, or tore my
+hair, but I took my hat, and, going forth, I flung my hat into the air.
+
+And when my hat came down, I put it on my head and commenced running,
+directing my course to the house of the Antinomian preacher, who sold
+books, and whom I knew to have Bibles in various tongues amongst the
+number, and I arrived out of breath, and I found the Antinomian in his
+little library, dusting his books; and the Antinomian clergyman was a
+tall man of about seventy, who wore a hat with a broad brim and a shallow
+crown, and whose manner of speaking was exceedingly nasal; and when I saw
+him, I cried, out of breath, 'Have you a Danish Bible?' and he replied,
+'What do you want it for, friend?' and I answered, 'To learn Danish by';
+'And maybe to learn thy duty,' replied the Antinomian preacher.  'Truly,
+I have it not, but, as you are a customer of mine, I will endeavour to
+procure you one, and I will write to that laudable society which men call
+the Bible Society, an unworthy member of which I am, and I hope by next
+week to procure what you desire.'
+
+And when I heard these words of the old man, I was very glad, and my
+heart yearned towards him, and I would fain enter into conversation with
+him; and I said, 'Why are you an Antinomian?  For my part I would rather
+be a dog than belong to such a religion.'  'Nay, friend,' said the
+Antinomian, 'thou forejudgest us; know that those who call us Antinomians
+call us so despitefully, we do not acknowledge the designation.'  'Then
+you do not set all law at nought?' said I.  'Far be it from us,' said the
+old man, 'we only hope that, being sanctified by the Spirit from above,
+we have no need of the law to keep us in order.  Did you ever hear tell
+of Lodowick Muggleton?'  'Not I.'  'That is strange; know then that he
+was the founder of our poor society, and after him we are frequently,
+though opprobriously, termed Muggletonians, for we are Christians.  Here
+is his book, which, perhaps, you can do no better than purchase, you are
+fond of rare books, and this is both curious and rare; I will sell it
+cheap.  Thank you, and now be gone, I will do all I can to procure the
+Bible.'
+
+And in this manner I procured the Danish Bible, and I commenced my task;
+first of all, however, I locked up in a closet the volume which had
+excited my curiosity, saying, 'Out of this closet thou comest not till I
+deem myself competent to read thee,' and then I sat down in right
+earnest, comparing every line in the one version with the corresponding
+one in the other; and I passed entire nights in this manner, till I was
+almost blind, and the task was tedious enough at first, but I quailed
+not, and soon began to make progress: and at first I had a misgiving that
+the old book might not prove a Danish book, but was soon reassured by
+reading many words in the Bible which I remembered to have seen in the
+book; and then I went on right merrily, and I found that the language
+which I was studying was by no means a difficult one, and in less than a
+month I deemed myself able to read the book.
+
+Anon, I took the book from the closet, and proceeded to make myself
+master of its contents; I had some difficulty, for the language of the
+book, though in the main the same as the language of the Bible, differed
+from it in some points, being apparently a more ancient dialect; by
+degrees, however, I overcame this difficulty, and I understood the
+contents of the book, and well did they correspond with all those ideas
+in which I had indulged connected with the Danes.  For the book was a
+book of ballads, about the deeds of knights and champions, and men of
+huge stature; ballads which from time immemorial had been sung in the
+North, and which some two centuries before the time of which I am
+speaking had been collected by one Anders Vedel, who lived with a certain
+Tycho Brahe, and assisted him in making observations upon the heavenly
+bodies, at a place called Uranias Castle, on the little island of Hveen,
+in the Cattegat.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIII
+
+
+The two individuals--The long pipe--The Germans--Werther--The female
+Quaker--Suicide--Gibbon--Jesus of Bethlehem--Fill your
+glass--Shakespeare--English at Minden--Melancholy Swayne Vonved--The
+fifth dinner--Strange doctrines--Are you happy?--Improve yourself in
+German.
+
+It might be some six months after the events last recorded, that two
+individuals were seated together in a certain room, in a certain street
+of the old town which I have so frequently had occasion to mention in the
+preceding pages; one of them was an elderly, and the other a very young
+man, and they sat on either side of a fireplace, beside a table on which
+were fruit and wine; the room was a small one, and in its furniture
+exhibited nothing remarkable.  Over the mantelpiece, however, hung a
+small picture with naked figures in the foreground, and with much foliage
+behind.  It might not have struck every beholder, for it looked old and
+smoke-dried; but a connoisseur, on inspecting it closely, would have
+pronounced it to be a judgment of Paris, and a masterpiece of the Flemish
+school.
+
+The forehead of the elder individual was high, and perhaps appeared more
+so than it really was, from the hair being carefully brushed back, as if
+for the purpose of displaying to the best advantage that part of the
+cranium; his eyes were large and full, and of a light brown, and might
+have been called heavy and dull, had they not been occasionally lighted
+up by a sudden gleam--not so brilliant however as that which at every
+inhalation shone from the bowl of the long clay pipe which he was
+smoking, but which, from a certain sucking sound which about this time
+began to be heard from the bottom, appeared to be giving notice that it
+would soon require replenishment from a certain canister, which, together
+with a lighted taper, stood upon the table beside him.
+
+'You do not smoke?' said he, at length, laying down his pipe, and
+directing his glance to his companion.
+
+Now there was at least one thing singular connected with this last,
+namely, the colour of his hair, which, notwithstanding his extreme youth,
+appeared to be rapidly becoming gray.  He had very long limbs, and was
+apparently tall of stature, in which he differed from his elderly
+companion, who must have been somewhat below the usual height.
+
+'No, I can't smoke,' said the youth, in reply to the observation of the
+other; 'I have often tried, but could never succeed to my satisfaction.'
+
+'Is it possible to become a good German without smoking?' said the
+senior, half speaking to himself.
+
+'I daresay not,' said the youth; 'but I shan't break my heart on that
+account.'
+
+'As for breaking your heart, of course you would never think of such a
+thing; he is a fool who breaks his heart on any account; but it is good
+to be a German, the Germans are the most philosophic people in the world,
+and the greatest smokers: now I trace their philosophy to their smoking.'
+
+'I have heard say their philosophy is all smoke--is that your opinion?'
+
+'Why, no; but smoking has a sedative effect upon the nerves, and enables
+a man to bear the sorrows of this life (of which every one has his share)
+not only decently, but dignifiedly.  Suicide is not a national habit in
+Germany as it is in England.'
+
+'But that poor creature, Werther, who committed suicide, was a German.'
+
+'Werther is a fictitious character, and by no means a felicitous one; I
+am no admirer either of Werther or his author.  But I should say that, if
+there ever was a Werther in Germany, he did not smoke.  Werther, as you
+very justly observe, was a poor creature.'
+
+'And a very sinful one; I have heard my parents say that suicide is a
+great crime.'
+
+'Broadly, and without qualification, to say that suicide is a crime, is
+speaking somewhat unphilosophically.  No doubt suicide, under many
+circumstances, is a crime, a very heinous one.  When the father of a
+family, for example, to escape from certain difficulties, commits
+suicide, he commits a crime; there are those around him who look to him
+for support, by the law of nature, and he has no right to withdraw
+himself from those who have a claim upon his exertions; he is a person
+who decamps with other people's goods as well as his own.  Indeed, there
+can be no crime which is not founded upon the depriving others of
+something which belongs to them.  A man is hanged for setting fire to his
+house in a crowded city, for he burns at the same time or damages those
+of other people; but if a man who has a house on a heath sets fire to it,
+he is not hanged, for he has not damaged or endangered any other
+individual's property, and the principle of revenge, upon which all
+punishment is founded, has not been aroused.  Similar to such a case is
+that of the man who, without any family ties, commits suicide; for
+example, were I to do the thing this evening, who would have a right to
+call me to account?  I am alone in the world, have no family to support,
+and, so far from damaging any one, should even benefit my heir by my
+accelerated death.  However, I am no advocate for suicide under any
+circumstances; there is something undignified in it, unheroic,
+un-Germanic.  But if you must commit suicide--and there is no knowing to
+what people may be brought--always contrive to do it as decorously as
+possible; the decencies, whether of life or of death, should never be
+lost sight of.  I remember a female Quaker who committed suicide by
+cutting her throat, but she did it decorously and decently: kneeling down
+over a pail, so that not one drop fell upon the floor; thus exhibiting in
+her last act that nice sense of neatness for which Quakers are
+distinguished.  I have always had a respect for that woman's memory.'
+
+And here, filling his pipe from the canister, and lighting it at the
+taper, he recommenced smoking calmly and sedately.
+
+'But is not suicide forbidden in the Bible?' the youth demanded.
+
+'Why, no; but what though it were!--the Bible is a respectable book, but
+I should hardly call it one whose philosophy is of the soundest.  I have
+said that it is a respectable book; I mean respectable from its
+antiquity, and from containing, as Herder says, "the earliest records of
+the human race," though those records are far from being dispassionately
+written, on which account they are of less value than they otherwise
+might have been.  There is too much passion in the Bible, too much
+violence; now, to come to all truth, especially historic truth, requires
+cool dispassionate investigation, for which the Jews do not appear to
+have ever been famous.  We are ourselves not famous for it, for we are a
+passionate people; the Germans are not--they are not a passionate
+people--a people celebrated for their oaths; we are.  The Germans have
+many excellent historic writers, we . . . 'tis true we have Gibbon . . .
+You have been reading Gibbon--what do you think of him?'
+
+'I think him a very wonderful writer.'
+
+'He is a wonderful writer--one _sui generis_--uniting the perspicuity of
+the English--for we are perspicuous--with the cool dispassionate
+reasoning of the Germans.  Gibbon sought after the truth, found it, and
+made it clear.'
+
+'Then you think Gibbon a truthful writer?'
+
+'Why, yes; who shall convict Gibbon of falsehood?  Many people have
+endeavoured to convict Gibbon of falsehood; they have followed him in his
+researches, and have never found him once tripping.  Oh, he is a
+wonderful writer! his power of condensation is admirable; the lore of the
+whole world is to be found in his pages.  Sometimes in a single note he
+has given us the result of the study of years; or, to speak
+metaphorically, "he has ransacked a thousand Gulistans, and has condensed
+all his fragrant booty into a single drop of otto."'
+
+'But was not Gibbon an enemy to the Christian faith?'
+
+'Why, no; he was rather an enemy to priestcraft, so am I; and when I say
+the philosophy of the Bible is in many respects unsound, I always wish to
+make an exception in favour of that part of it which contains the life
+and sayings of Jesus of Bethlehem, to which I must always concede my
+unqualified admiration--of Jesus, mind you; for with his followers and
+their dogmas I have nothing to do.  Of all historic characters Jesus is
+the most beautiful and the most heroic.  I have always been a friend to
+hero-worship, it is the only rational one, and has always been in use
+amongst civilised people--the worship of spirits is synonymous with
+barbarism--it is mere fetish; the savages of West Africa are all spirit-
+worshippers.  But there is something philosophic in the worship of the
+heroes of the human race, and the true hero is the benefactor.  Brahma,
+Jupiter, Bacchus, were all benefactors, and, therefore, entitled to the
+worship of their respective peoples.  The Celts worshipped Hesus, who
+taught them to plough, a highly useful art.  We, who have attained a much
+higher state of civilisation than the Celts ever did, worship Jesus, the
+first who endeavoured to teach men to behave decently and decorously
+under all circumstances; who was the foe of vengeance, in which there is
+something highly indecorous; who had first the courage to lift his voice
+against that violent dogma, "an eye for an eye"; who shouted conquer, but
+conquer with kindness; who said put up the sword, a violent unphilosophic
+weapon; and who finally died calmly and decorously in defence of his
+philosophy.  He must be a savage who denies worship to the hero of
+Golgotha.'
+
+'But he was something more than a hero; he was the Son of God, wasn't
+he?'
+
+The elderly individual made no immediate answer; but, after a few more
+whiffs from his pipe, exclaimed, 'Come, fill your glass!  How do you
+advance with your translation of _Tell_'?
+
+'It is nearly finished; but I do not think I shall proceed with it; I
+begin to think the original somewhat dull.'
+
+'There you are wrong; it is the masterpiece of Schiller, the first of
+German poets.'
+
+'It may be so,' said the youth.  'But, pray excuse me, I do not think
+very highly of German poetry.  I have lately been reading Shakespeare;
+and, when I turn from him to the Germans--even the best of them--they
+appear mere pigmies.  You will pardon the liberty I perhaps take in
+saying so.'
+
+'I like that every one should have an opinion of his own,' said the
+elderly individual; 'and, what is more, declare it.  Nothing displeases
+me more than to see people assenting to everything that they hear said; I
+at once come to the conclusion that they are either hypocrites, or there
+is nothing in them.  But, with respect to Shakespeare, whom I have not
+read for thirty years, is he not rather given to bombast, "crackling
+bombast," as I think I have said in one of my essays?'
+
+'I daresay he is,' said the youth; 'but I can't help thinking him the
+greatest of all poets, not even excepting Homer.  I would sooner have
+written that series of plays, founded on the fortunes of the House of
+Lancaster, than the _Iliad_ itself.  The events described are as lofty as
+those sung by Homer in his great work, and the characters brought upon
+the stage still more interesting.  I think Hotspur as much of a hero as
+Hector, and young Henry more of a man than Achilles; and then there is
+the fat knight, the quintessence of fun, wit, and rascality.  Falstaff is
+a creation beyond the genius even of Homer.'
+
+'You almost tempt me to read Shakespeare again--but the Germans?'
+
+'I don't admire the Germans,' said the youth, somewhat excited.  'I don't
+admire them in any point of view.  I have heard my father say that,
+though good sharpshooters, they can't be much depended upon as soldiers;
+and that old Sergeant Meredith told him that Minden would never have been
+won but for the two English regiments, who charged the French with fixed
+bayonets, and sent them to the right-about in double-quick time.  With
+respect to poetry, setting Shakespeare and the English altogether aside,
+I think there is another Gothic nation, at least, entitled to dispute
+with them the palm.  Indeed, to my mind, there is more genuine poetry
+contained in the old Danish book which I came so strangely by, than has
+been produced in Germany from the period of the Niebelungen lay to the
+present.'
+
+'Ah, the Koempe Viser?' said the elderly individual, breathing forth an
+immense volume of smoke, which he had been collecting during the
+declamation of his young companion.  'There are singular things in that
+book, I must confess; and I thank you for showing it to me, or rather
+your attempt at translation.  I was struck with that ballad of Orm
+Ungarswayne, who goes by night to the grave-hill of his father to seek
+for counsel.  And then, again, that strange melancholy Swayne Vonved, who
+roams about the world propounding people riddles; slaying those who
+cannot answer, and rewarding those who can with golden bracelets.  Were
+it not for the violence, I should say that ballad has a philosophic
+tendency.  I thank you for making me acquainted with the book, and I
+thank the Jew Mousha for making me acquainted with you.'
+
+'That Mousha was a strange customer,' said the youth, collecting himself.
+
+'He _was_ a strange customer,' said the elder individual, breathing forth
+a gentle cloud.  'I love to exercise hospitality to wandering strangers,
+especially foreigners; and when he came to this place, pretending to
+teach German and Hebrew, I asked him to dinner.  After the first dinner,
+he asked me to lend him five pounds; I _did_ lend him five pounds.  After
+the fifth dinner, he asked me to lend him fifty pounds; I did _not_ lend
+him the fifty pounds.'
+
+'He was as ignorant of German as of Hebrew,' said the youth; 'on which
+account he was soon glad, I suppose, to transfer his pupil to some one
+else.'
+
+'He told me,' said the elder individual, 'that he intended to leave a
+town where he did not find sufficient encouragement; and, at the same
+time, expressed regret at being obliged to abandon a certain
+extraordinary pupil, for whom he had a particular regard.  Now I, who
+have taught many people German from the love which I bear to it, and the
+desire which I feel that it should be generally diffused, instantly said
+that I should be happy to take his pupil off his hands, and afford him
+what instruction I could in German, for, as to Hebrew, I have never taken
+much interest in it.  Such was the origin of our acquaintance.  You have
+been an apt scholar.  Of late, however, I have seen little of you--what
+is the reason?'
+
+The youth made no answer.
+
+'You think, probably, that you have learned all I can teach you?  Well,
+perhaps you are right.'
+
+'Not so, not so,' said the young man eagerly; 'before I knew you I knew
+nothing, and am still very ignorant; but of late my father's health has
+been very much broken, and he requires attention; his spirits also have
+become low, which, to tell you the truth, he attributes to my misconduct.
+He says that I have imbibed all kinds of strange notions and doctrines,
+which will, in all probability, prove my ruin, both here and hereafter;
+which--which--'
+
+'Ah!  I understand,' said the elder, with another calm whiff.  'I have
+always had a kind of respect for your father, for there is something
+remarkable in his appearance, something heroic, and I would fain have
+cultivated his acquaintance; the feeling, however, has not been
+reciprocated.  I met him, the other day, up the road, with his cane and
+dog, and saluted him; he did not return my salutation.'
+
+'He has certain opinions of his own,' said the youth, 'which are widely
+different from those which he has heard that you profess.'
+
+'I respect a man for entertaining an opinion of his own,' said the
+elderly individual.  'I hold certain opinions; but I should not respect
+an individual the more for adopting them.  All I wish for is tolerance,
+which I myself endeavour to practise.  I have always loved the truth, and
+sought it; if I have not found it, the greater my misfortune.'
+
+'Are you happy?' said the young man.
+
+'Why, no!  And, between ourselves, it is that which induces me to doubt
+sometimes the truth of my opinions.  My life, upon the whole, I consider
+a failure; on which account, I would not counsel you, or any one, to
+follow my example too closely.  It is getting late, and you had better be
+going, especially as your father, you say, is anxious about you.  But, as
+we may never meet again, I think there are three things which I may
+safely venture to press upon you.  The first is, that the decencies and
+gentlenesses should never be lost sight of, as the practice of the
+decencies and gentlenesses is at all times compatible with independence
+of thought and action.  The second thing which I would wish to impress
+upon you is, that there is always some eye upon us; and that it is
+impossible to keep anything we do from the world, as it will assuredly be
+divulged by somebody as soon as it is his interest to do so.  The third
+thing which I would wish to press upon you--'
+
+'Yes,' said the youth, eagerly bending forward.
+
+'Is--' and here the elderly individual laid down his pipe upon the
+table--'that it will be as well to go on improving yourself in German!'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIV
+
+
+The alehouse-keeper--Compassion for the rich--Old English gentleman--How
+is this?--Madeira--The Greek Parr--Twenty languages--Whiter's
+health--About the fight--A sporting gentleman--The flattened nose--Lend
+us that pightle--The surly nod.
+
+'Holloa, master! can you tell us where the fight is likely to be?'
+
+Such were the words shouted out to me by a short thick fellow, in brown
+top-boots, and bareheaded, who stood, with his hands in his pockets, at
+the door of a country alehouse as I was passing by.
+
+Now, as I knew nothing about the fight, and as the appearance of the man
+did not tempt me greatly to enter into conversation with him, I merely
+answered in the negative, and continued my way.
+
+It was a fine lovely morning in May, the sun shone bright above, and the
+birds were carolling in the hedgerows.  I was wont to be cheerful at such
+seasons, for, from my earliest recollection, sunshine and the song of
+birds have been dear to me; yet, about that period, I was not cheerful,
+my mind was not at rest; I was debating within myself, and the debate was
+dreary and unsatisfactory enough.  I sighed, and turning my eyes upward,
+I ejaculated, 'What is truth?'
+
+But suddenly, by a violent effort breaking away from my meditations, I
+hastened forward; one mile, two miles, three miles were speedily left
+behind; and now I came to a grove of birch and other trees, and opening a
+gate I passed up a kind of avenue, and soon arriving before a large brick
+house, of rather antique appearance, knocked at the door.
+
+In this house there lived a gentleman with whom I had business.  He was
+said to be a genuine old English gentleman, and a man of considerable
+property; at this time, however, he wanted a thousand pounds, as
+gentlemen of considerable property every now and then do.  I had brought
+him a thousand pounds in my pocket, for it is astonishing how many eager
+helpers the rich find, and with what compassion people look upon their
+distresses.  He was said to have good wine in his cellar.
+
+'Is your master at home?' said I, to a servant who appeared at the door.
+
+'His worship is at home, young man,' said the servant, as he looked at my
+shoes, which bore evidence that I had come walking.  'I beg your pardon,
+sir,' he added, as he looked me in the face.
+
+'Ay, ay, servants,' thought I, as I followed the man into the house,
+'always look people in the face when you open the door, and do so before
+you look at their shoes, or you may mistake the heir of a Prime Minister
+for a shopkeeper's son.'
+
+I found his worship a jolly, red-faced gentleman, of about fifty-five; he
+was dressed in a green coat, white corduroy breeches, and drab gaiters,
+and sat on an old-fashioned leather sofa, with two small, thoroughbred,
+black English terriers, one on each side of him.  He had all the
+appearance of a genuine old English gentleman who kept good wine in his
+cellar.
+
+'Sir,' said I, 'I have brought you a thousand pounds'; and I said this
+after the servant had retired, and the two terriers had ceased the
+barking which is natural to all such dogs at the sight of a stranger.
+
+And when the magistrate had received the money, and signed and returned a
+certain paper which I handed to him, he rubbed his hands, and looking
+very benignantly at me, exclaimed--
+
+'And now, young gentleman, that our business is over, perhaps you can
+tell me where the fight is to take place?'
+
+'I am sorry, sir,' said I, 'that I can't inform you, but everybody seems
+to be anxious about it'; and then I told him what had occurred to me on
+the road with the alehouse-keeper.
+
+'I know him,' said his worship; 'he's a tenant of mine, and a good
+fellow, somewhat too much in my debt though.  But how is this, young
+gentleman, you look as if you had been walking; you did not come on
+foot?'
+
+'Yes, sir, I came on foot.'
+
+'On foot! why it is sixteen miles.'
+
+'I shan't be tired when I have walked back.'
+
+'You can't ride, I suppose?'
+
+'Better than I can walk.'
+
+'Then why do you walk?'
+
+'I have frequently to make journeys connected with my profession;
+sometimes I walk, sometimes I ride, just as the whim takes me.'
+
+'Will you take a glass of wine?'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'That's right; what shall it be?'
+
+'Madeira!'
+
+The magistrate gave a violent slap on his knee; 'I like your taste,' said
+he, 'I am fond of a glass of Madeira myself, and can give you such a one
+as you will not drink every day; sit down, young gentleman, you shall
+have a glass of Madeira, and the best I have.'
+
+Thereupon he got up, and, followed by his two terriers, walked slowly out
+of the room.
+
+I looked round the room, and, seeing nothing which promised me much
+amusement, I sat down, and fell again into my former train of thought.
+'What is truth?' said I.
+
+'Here it is,' said the magistrate, returning at the end of a quarter of
+an hour, followed by the servant with a tray; 'here's the true thing, or
+I am no judge, far less a justice.  It has been thirty years in my cellar
+last Christmas.  There,' said he to the servant, 'put it down, and leave
+my young friend and me to ourselves.  Now, what do you think of it?'
+
+'It is very good,' said I.
+
+'Did you ever taste better Madeira?'
+
+'I never before tasted Madeira.'
+
+'Then you ask for a wine without knowing what it is?'
+
+'I ask for it, sir, that I may know what it is.'
+
+'Well, there is logic in that, as Parr would say; you have heard of
+Parr?'
+
+'Old Parr?'
+
+'Yes, old Parr, but not that Parr; you mean the English, I the Greek
+Parr, as people call him.'
+
+'I don't know him.'
+
+'Perhaps not--rather too young for that, but were you of my age, you
+might have cause to know him, coming from where you do.  He kept school
+there, I was his first scholar; he flogged Greek into me till I loved
+him--and he loved me: he came to see me last year, and sat in that chair;
+I honour Parr--he knows much, and is a sound man.'
+
+'Does he know the truth?'
+
+'Know the truth! he knows what's good, from an oyster to an ostrich--he's
+not only sound, but round.'
+
+'Suppose we drink his health?'
+
+'Thank you, boy: here's Parr's health, and Whiter's.'
+
+'Who is Whiter?'
+
+'Don't you know Whiter?  I thought everybody knew Reverend Whiter the
+philologist, though I suppose you scarcely know what that means.  A man
+fond of tongues and languages, quite out of your way--he understands some
+twenty; what do you say to that?'
+
+'Is he a sound man?'
+
+'Why, as to that, I scarcely know what to say: he has got queer notions
+in his head--wrote a book to prove that all words came originally from
+the earth--who knows?  Words have roots, and roots live in the earth;
+but, upon the whole, I should not call him altogether a sound man, though
+he can talk Greek nearly as fast as Parr.'
+
+'Is he a round man?'
+
+'Ay, boy, rounder than Parr; I'll sing you a song, if you like, which
+will let you into his character:--
+
+   'Give me the haunch of a buck to eat, and to drink Madeira old,
+   And a gentle wife to rest with, and in my arms to fold,
+   An Arabic book to study, a Norfolk cob to ride,
+   And a house to live in shaded with trees, and near to a river side;
+   With such good things around me, and blessed with good health withal,
+   Though I should live for a hundred years, for death I would not call.
+
+Here's to Whiter's health--so you know nothing about the fight?'
+
+'No, sir; the truth is, that of late I have been very much occupied with
+various matters, otherwise I should, perhaps, have been able to afford
+you some information--boxing is a noble art.'
+
+'Can you box?'
+
+'A little.'
+
+'I tell you what, my boy; I honour you, and provided your education had
+been a little less limited, I should have been glad to see you here in
+company with Parr and Whiter; both can box.  Boxing is, as you say, a
+noble art--a truly English art; may I never see the day when Englishmen
+shall feel ashamed of it, or blacklegs and blackguards bring it into
+disgrace.  I am a magistrate, and, of course, cannot patronise the thing
+very openly, yet I sometimes see a prize fight: I saw the Game Chicken
+beat Gulley.'
+
+'Did you ever see Big Ben?'
+
+'No; why do you ask?'  But here we heard a noise, like that of a gig
+driving up to the door, which was immediately succeeded by a violent
+knocking and ringing, and after a little time the servant who had
+admitted me made his appearance in the room.  'Sir,' said he, with a
+certain eagerness of manner, 'here are two gentlemen waiting to speak to
+you.'
+
+'Gentlemen waiting to speak to me! who are they?'
+
+'I don't know, sir,' said the servant; 'but they look like sporting
+gentlemen, and--and'--here he hesitated; 'from a word or two they
+dropped, I almost think that they come about the fight.'
+
+'About the fight!' said the magistrate.  'No; that can hardly be;
+however, you had better show them in.'
+
+Heavy steps were now heard ascending the stairs, and the servant ushered
+two men into the apartment.  Again there was a barking, but louder than
+that which had been directed against myself, for here were two intruders;
+both of them were remarkable-looking men, but to the foremost of them the
+most particular notice may well be accorded: he was a man somewhat under
+thirty, and nearly six feet in height.  He was dressed in a blue coat,
+white corduroy breeches, fastened below the knee with small golden
+buttons; on his legs he wore white lamb's-wool stockings, and on his feet
+shoes reaching to the ankles; round his neck was a handkerchief of the
+blue and bird's eye pattern; he wore neither whiskers nor moustaches, and
+appeared not to delight in hair, that of his head, which was of a light
+brown, being closely cropped; the forehead was rather high, but somewhat
+narrow; the face neither broad nor sharp, perhaps rather sharp than
+broad; the nose was almost delicate; the eyes were gray, with an
+expression in which there was sternness blended with something
+approaching to feline; his complexion was exceedingly pale, relieved,
+however, by certain pock-marks, which here and there studded his
+countenance; his form was athletic, but lean; his arms long.  In the
+whole appearance of the man there was a blending of the bluff and the
+sharp.  You might have supposed him a bruiser; his dress was that of one
+in all its minutiae; something was wanting, however, in his manner--the
+quietness of the professional man; he rather looked like one performing
+the part--well--very well--but still performing a part.  His
+companion!--there, indeed, was the bruiser--no mistake about him: a tall
+massive man, with a broad countenance and a flattened nose; dressed like
+a bruiser, but not like a bruiser going into the ring; he wore
+white-topped boots, and a loose brown jockey coat.
+
+As the first advanced towards the table, behind which the magistrate sat,
+he doffed a white castor from his head, and made rather a genteel bow;
+looking at me, who sat somewhat on one side, he gave a kind of nod of
+recognition.
+
+'May I request to know who you are, gentlemen?' said the magistrate.
+
+'Sir,' said the man in a deep, but not unpleasant voice, 'allow me to
+introduce to you my friend, Mr. ---, the celebrated pugilist'; and he
+motioned with his hand towards the massive man with the flattened nose.
+
+'And your own name, sir?' said the magistrate.
+
+'My name is no matter,' said the man; 'were I to mention it to you, it
+would awaken within you no feeling of interest.  It is neither Kean nor
+Belcher, and I have as yet done nothing to distinguish myself like either
+of those individuals, or even like my friend here.  However, a time may
+come--we are not yet buried; and whensoever my hour arrives, I hope I
+shall prove myself equal to my destiny, however high--
+
+   'Like bird that's bred amongst the Helicons.'
+
+And here a smile half theatrical passed over his features.
+
+'In what can I oblige you, sir?' said the magistrate.
+
+'Well, sir; the soul of wit is brevity; we want a place for an
+approaching combat between my friend here and a brave from town.  Passing
+by your broad acres this fine morning we saw a pightle, which we deemed
+would suit.  Lend us that pightle, and receive our thanks; 'twould be a
+favour, though not much to grant: we neither ask for Stonehenge nor for
+Tempe.'
+
+My friend looked somewhat perplexed; after a moment, however, he said,
+with a firm but gentlemanly air, 'Sir, I am sorry that I cannot comply
+with your request.'
+
+'Not comply!' said the man, his brow becoming dark as midnight; and with
+a hoarse and savage tone, 'Not comply! why not?'
+
+'It is impossible, sir; utterly impossible!'
+
+'Why so?'
+
+'I am not compelled to give my reasons to you, sir, nor to any man.'
+
+'Let me beg of you to alter your decision,' said the man, in a tone of
+profound respect.
+
+'Utterly impossible, sir; I am a magistrate.'
+
+'Magistrate! then fare ye well, for a green-coated buffer and a
+Harmanbeck.'
+
+'Sir!' said the magistrate, springing up with a face fiery with wrath.
+
+But, with a surly nod to me, the man left the apartment; and in a moment
+more the heavy footsteps of himself and his companion were heard
+descending the staircase.
+
+'Who is that man?' said my friend, turning towards me.
+
+'A sporting gentleman, well known in the place from which I come.'
+
+'He appeared to know you.'
+
+'I have occasionally put on the gloves with him.'
+
+'What is his name?'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXV
+
+
+Doubts--Wise king of Jerusalem--Let me see--A thousand years--Nothing
+new--The crowd--The hymn--Faith--Charles Wesley--There he stood--Farewell,
+brother--Death--Sun, moon, and stars--Wind on the heath.
+
+There was one question which I was continually asking myself at this
+period, and which has more than once met the eyes of the reader who has
+followed me through the last chapter: 'What is truth?'  I had involved
+myself imperceptibly in a dreary labyrinth of doubt, and, whichever way I
+turned, no reasonable prospect of extricating myself appeared.  The means
+by which I had brought myself into this situation may be very briefly
+told; I had inquired into many matters, in order that I might become
+wise, and I had read and pondered over the words of the wise, so called,
+till I had made myself master of the sum of human wisdom; namely, that
+everything is enigmatical and that man is an enigma to himself; thence
+the cry of 'What is truth?'  I had ceased to believe in the truth of that
+in which I had hitherto trusted, and yet could find nothing in which I
+could put any fixed or deliberate belief--I was, indeed, in a labyrinth!
+In what did I not doubt?  With respect to crime and virtue I was in
+doubt; I doubted that the one was blamable and the other praiseworthy.
+Are not all things subjected to the law of necessity?  Assuredly time and
+chance govern all things: Yet how can this be? alas!
+
+Then there was myself; for what was I born?  Are not all things born to
+be forgotten?  That's incomprehensible: yet is it not so?  Those
+butterflies fall and are forgotten.  In what is man better than a
+butterfly?  All then is born to be forgotten.  Ah! that was a pang
+indeed; 'tis at such a moment that a man wishes to die.  The wise king of
+Jerusalem, who sat in his shady arbours beside his sunny fish-pools,
+saying so many fine things, wished to die, when he saw that not only all
+was vanity, but that he himself was vanity.  Will a time come when all
+will be forgotten that now is beneath the sun?  If so, of what profit is
+life?
+
+In truth it was a sore vexation of spirit to me when I saw, as the wise
+man saw of old, that whatever I could hope to perform must necessarily be
+of very temporary duration; and if so, why do it?  I said to myself,
+whatever name I can acquire, will it endure for eternity? scarcely so.  A
+thousand years?  Let me see! what have I done already?  I have learnt
+Welsh, and have translated the songs of Ab Gwilym, some ten thousand
+lines, into English rhyme; I have also learnt Danish, and have rendered
+the old book of ballads cast by the tempest upon the beach into
+corresponding English metre.  Good! have I done enough already to secure
+myself a reputation of a thousand years?  No, no! certainly not; I have
+not the slightest ground for hoping that my translations from the Welsh
+and Danish will be read at the end of a thousand years.  Well, but I am
+only eighteen, and I have not stated all that I have done; I have learnt
+many other tongues, and have acquired some knowledge even of Hebrew and
+Arabic.  Should I go on in this way till I am forty, I must then be very
+learned; and perhaps, among other things, may have translated the Talmud,
+and some of the great works of the Arabians.  Pooh! all this is mere
+learning and translation, and such will never secure immortality.
+Translation is at best an echo, and it must be a wonderful echo to be
+heard after the lapse of a thousand years.  No! all I have already done,
+and all I may yet do in the same way, I may reckon as nothing--mere
+pastime; something else must be done.  I must either write some grand
+original work, or conquer an empire; the one just as easy as the other.
+But am I competent to do either?  Yes, I think I am, under favourable
+circumstances.  Yes, I think I may promise myself a reputation of a
+thousand years, if I do but give myself the necessary trouble.  Well! but
+what's a thousand years after all, or twice a thousand years?  Woe is me!
+I may just as well sit still.
+
+'Would I had never been born!' I said to myself; and a thought would
+occasionally intrude: But was I ever born?  Is not all that I see a lie--a
+deceitful phantom?  Is there a world, and earth, and sky?  Berkeley's
+doctrine--Spinoza's doctrine!  Dear reader, I had at that time never read
+either Berkeley or Spinoza.  I have still never read them; who are they,
+men of yesterday?  'All is a lie--all a deceitful phantom,' are old
+cries; they come naturally from the mouths of those who, casting aside
+that choicest shield against madness, simplicity, would fain be wise as
+God, and can only know that they are naked.  This doubting in the
+'universal all' is almost coeval with the human race: wisdom, so called,
+was early sought after.  All is a lie--a deceitful phantom--was said when
+the world was yet young; its surface, save a scanty portion, yet
+untrodden by human foot, and when the great tortoise yet crawled about.
+All is a lie, was the doctrine of Buddh; and Buddh lived thirty centuries
+before the wise king of Jerusalem, who sat in his arbours, beside his
+sunny fish-pools, saying many fine things, and, amongst others, 'There is
+nothing new under the sun!'
+
+* * * * *
+
+One day, whilst I bent my way to the heath of which I have spoken on a
+former occasion, at the foot of the hills which formed it I came to a
+place where a wagon was standing, but without horses, the shafts resting
+on the ground; there was a crowd about it, which extended half-way up the
+side of the neighbouring hill.  The wagon was occupied by some half a
+dozen men; some sitting, others standing--they were dressed in
+sober-coloured habiliments of black or brown, cut in a plain and rather
+uncouth fashion, and partially white with dust; their hair was short, and
+seemed to have been smoothed down by the application of the hand; all
+were bareheaded--sitting or standing, all were bareheaded.  One of them,
+a tall man, was speaking as I arrived; ere, however, I could distinguish
+what he was saying, he left off, and then there was a cry for a hymn 'to
+the glory of God'--that was the word.  It was a strange-sounding hymn, as
+well it might be, for everybody joined in it: there were voices of all
+kinds, of men, of women, and of children--of those who could sing and of
+those who could not--a thousand voices all joined, and all joined
+heartily; no voice of all the multitude was silent save mine.  The crowd
+consisted entirely of the lower classes, labourers and mechanics, and
+their wives and children--dusty people, unwashed people, people of no
+account whatever, and yet they did not look a mob.  And when that hymn
+was over--and here let me observe that, strange as it sounded, I have
+recalled that hymn to mind, and it has seemed to tingle in my ears on
+occasions when all that pomp and art could do to enhance religious
+solemnity was being done--in the Sistine Chapel, what time the papal band
+was in full play, and the choicest choristers of Italy poured forth their
+mellowest tones in presence of Batuschca and his cardinals--on the ice of
+the Neva, what time the long train of stately priests, with their noble
+beards and their flowing robes of crimson and gold, with their ebony and
+ivory staves, stalked along, chanting their Sclavonian litanies in
+advance of the mighty Emperor of the North and his Priberjensky guard of
+giants, towards the orifice through which the river, running below in its
+swiftness, is to receive the baptismal lymph:--when the hymn was over,
+another man in the wagon proceeded to address the people; he was a much
+younger man than the last speaker; somewhat square built and about the
+middle height; his face was rather broad, but expressive of much
+intelligence, and with a peculiar calm and serious look; the accent in
+which he spoke indicated that he was not of these parts, but from some
+distant district.  The subject of his address was faith, and how it could
+remove mountains.  It was a plain address, without any attempt at
+ornament, and delivered in a tone which was neither loud nor vehement.
+The speaker was evidently not a practised one--once or twice he hesitated
+as if for words to express his meaning, but still he held on, talking of
+faith, and how it could remove mountains: 'It is the only thing we want,
+brethren, in this world; if we have that, we are indeed rich, as it will
+enable us to do our duty under all circumstances, and to bear our lot,
+however hard it may be--and the lot of all mankind is hard--the lot of
+the poor is hard, brethren--and who knows more of the poor than I?--a
+poor man myself, and the son of a poor man: but are the rich better off?
+not so, brethren, for God is just.  The rich have their trials too: I am
+not rich myself, but I have seen the rich with careworn countenances; I
+have also seen them in madhouses; from which you may learn, brethren,
+that the lot of all mankind is hard; that is, till we lay hold of faith,
+which makes us comfortable under all circumstances; whether we ride in
+gilded chariots or walk barefooted in quest of bread; whether we be
+ignorant, whether we be wise--for riches and poverty, ignorance and
+wisdom, brethren, each brings with it its peculiar temptations.  Well,
+under all these troubles, the thing which I would recommend you to seek
+is one and the same--faith; faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, who made us
+and allotted to each his station.  Each has something to do, brethren.  Do
+it, therefore, but always in faith; without faith we shall find ourselves
+sometimes at fault; but with faith never--for faith can remove the
+difficulty.  It will teach us to love life, brethren, when life is
+becoming bitter, and to prize the blessings around us; for as every man
+has his cares, brethren, so has each man his blessings.  It will likewise
+teach us not to love life over much, seeing that we must one day part
+with it.  It will teach us to face death with resignation, and will
+preserve us from sinking amidst the swelling of the river Jordan.'
+
+And when he had concluded his address, he said, 'Let us sing a hymn, one
+composed by Master Charles Wesley--he was my countryman, brethren.
+
+   'Jesus, I cast my soul on Thee,
+   Mighty and merciful to save;
+   Thou shalt to death go down with me,
+   And lay me gently in the grave.
+   This body then shall rest in hope,
+   This body which the worms destroy;
+   For Thou shalt surely raise me up
+   To glorious life and endless joy.'
+
+Farewell, preacher with the plain coat and the calm serious look!  I saw
+thee once again, and that was lately--only the other day.  It was near a
+fishing hamlet, by the sea-side, that I saw the preacher again.  He stood
+on the top of a steep monticle, used by pilots as a look-out for vessels
+approaching that coast, a dangerous one, abounding in rocks and quick-
+sands.  There he stood on the monticle, preaching to weather-worn
+fishermen and mariners gathered below upon the sand.  'Who is he?' said I
+to an old fisherman who stood beside me with a book of hymns in his hand;
+but the old man put his hand to his lips, and that was the only answer I
+received.  Not a sound was heard but the voice of the preacher and the
+roaring of the waves; but the voice was heard loud above the roaring of
+the sea, for the preacher now spoke with power, and his voice was not
+that of one who hesitates.  There he stood--no longer a young man, for
+his black locks were become gray, even like my own; but there was the
+intelligent face, and the calm serious look which had struck me of yore.
+There stood the preacher, one of those men--and, thank God, their number
+is not few--who, animated by the spirit of Christ, amidst much poverty,
+and, alas! much contempt, persist in carrying the light of the Gospel
+amidst the dark parishes of what, but for their instrumentality, would
+scarcely be Christian England.  I would have waited till he had
+concluded, in order that I might speak to him, and endeavour to bring
+back the ancient scene to his recollection, but suddenly a man came
+hurrying towards the monticle, mounted on a speedy horse, and holding by
+the bridle one yet more speedy, and he whispered to me, 'Why loiterest
+thou here?--knowest thou not all that is to be done before midnight?' and
+he flung me the bridle; and I mounted on the horse of great speed, and I
+followed the other, who had already galloped off.  And as I departed, I
+waved my hand to him on the monticle, and I shouted, 'Farewell, brother!
+the seed came up at last, after a long period!' and then I gave the
+speedy horse his way, and leaning over the shoulder of the galloping
+horse, I said, 'Would that my life had been like his--even like that
+man's!'
+
+I now wandered along the heath, till I came to a place where, beside a
+thick furze, sat a man, his eyes fixed intently on the red ball of the
+setting sun.
+
+'That's not you, Jasper?'
+
+'Indeed, brother!'
+
+'I've not seen you for years.'
+
+'How should you, brother?'
+
+'What brings you here?'
+
+'The fight, brother.'
+
+'Where are the tents?'
+
+'On the old spot, brother.'
+
+'Any news since we parted?'
+
+'Two deaths, brother.'
+
+'Who are dead, Jasper?'
+
+'Father and mother, brother.'
+
+'Where did they die?'
+
+'Where they were sent, brother.'
+
+'And Mrs. Herne?'
+
+'She's alive, brother.'
+
+'Where is she now?'
+
+'In Yorkshire, brother.'
+
+'What is your opinion of death, Mr. Petulengro?' said I, as I sat down
+beside him.
+
+'My opinion of death, brother, is much the same as that in the old song
+of Pharaoh, which I have heard my grandam sing--
+
+   Cana marel o manus chivios ande puv,
+   Ta rovel pa leste o chavo ta romi.
+
+When a man dies, he is cast into the earth, and his wife and child sorrow
+over him.  If he has neither wife nor child, then his father and mother,
+I suppose; and if he is quite alone in the world, why, then, he is cast
+into the earth, and there is an end of the matter.'
+
+{picture:'There's the wind on the heath, brother; if I could only feel
+that, I would gladly live for ever.': page171.jpg}
+
+'And do you think that is the end of a man?'
+
+'There's an end of him, brother, more's the pity.'
+
+'Why do you say so?'
+
+'Life is sweet, brother.'
+
+'Do you think so?'
+
+'Think so!--There's night and day, brother, both sweet things; sun, moon,
+and stars, brother, all sweet things; there's likewise a wind on the
+heath.  Life is very sweet, brother; who would wish to die?'
+
+'I would wish to die--'
+
+'You talk like a gorgio--which is the same as talking like a fool--were
+you a Rommany Chal you would talk wiser.  Wish to die, indeed!--A Rommany
+Chal would wish to live for ever!'
+
+'In sickness, Jasper?'
+
+'There's the sun and stars, brother.'
+
+'In blindness, Jasper?'
+
+'There's the wind on the heath, brother; if I could only feel that, I
+would gladly live for ever.  Dosta, we'll now go to the tents and put on
+the gloves; and I'll try to make you feel what a sweet thing it is to be
+alive, brother!'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVI
+
+
+The flower of the grass--Days of pugilism--The rendezvous--Jews--Bruisers
+of England--Winter, spring--Well-earned bays--The fight--Huge black
+cloud--Frame of adamant--The storm--Dukkeripens--The barouche--The rain-
+gushes.
+
+How for everything there is a time and a season, and then how does the
+glory of a thing pass from it, even like the flower of the grass.  This
+is a truism, but it is one of those which are continually forcing
+themselves upon the mind.  Many years have not passed over my head, yet,
+during those which I can recall to remembrance, how many things have I
+seen flourish, pass away, and become forgotten, except by myself, who, in
+spite of all my endeavours, never can forget anything.  I have known the
+time when a pugilistic encounter between two noted champions was almost
+considered in the light of a national affair; when tens of thousands of
+individuals, high and low, meditated and brooded upon it, the first thing
+in the morning and the last at night, until the great event was decided.
+But the time is past, and many people will say, thank God that it is; all
+I have to say is, that the French still live on the other side of the
+water, and are still casting their eyes hitherward--and that in the days
+of pugilism it was no vain blast to say that one Englishman was a match
+for two of t'other race; at present it would be a vain boast to say so,
+for these are not the days of pugilism.
+
+But those to which the course of my narrative has carried me were the
+days of pugilism; it was then at its height, and consequently near its
+decline, for corruption had crept into the ring; and how many things,
+states and sects among the rest, owe their decline to this cause!  But
+what a bold and vigorous aspect pugilism wore at that time! and the great
+battle was just then coming off: the day had been decided upon, and the
+spot--a convenient distance from the old town; and to the old town were
+now flocking the bruisers of England, men of tremendous renown.  Let no
+one sneer at the bruisers of England--what were the gladiators of Rome,
+or the bull-fighters of Spain, in its palmiest days, compared to
+England's bruisers?  Pity that ever corruption should have crept in
+amongst them--but of that I wish not to talk; let us still hope that a
+spark of the old religion, of which they were the priests, still lingers
+in the breasts of Englishmen.  There they come, the bruisers, from far
+London, or from wherever else they might chance to be at the time, to the
+great rendezvous in the old city; some came one way, some another: some
+of tip-top reputation came with peers in their chariots, for glory and
+fame are such fair things that even peers are proud to have those
+invested therewith by their sides; others came in their own gigs, driving
+their own bits of blood, and I heard one say: 'I have driven through at a
+heat the whole hundred and eleven miles, and only stopped to bait twice.'
+Oh, the blood-horses of old England! but they, too, have had their
+day--for everything beneath the sun there is a season and a time.  But
+the greater number come just as they can contrive; on the tops of
+coaches, for example; and amongst these there are fellows with dark
+sallow faces and sharp shining eyes; and it is these that have planted
+rottenness in the core of pugilism, for they are Jews, and, true to their
+kind, have only base lucre in view.
+
+It was fierce old Cobbett, I think, who first said that the Jews first
+introduced bad faith amongst pugilists.  He did not always speak the
+truth, but at any rate he spoke it when he made that observation.  Strange
+people the Jews--endowed with every gift but one, and that the highest,
+genius divine--genius which can alone make of men demigods, and elevate
+them above earth and what is earthy and grovelling; without which a
+clever nation--and, who more clever than the Jews?--may have Rambams in
+plenty, but never a Fielding nor a Shakespeare.  A Rothschild and a
+Mendoza, yes--but never a Kean nor a Belcher.
+
+So the bruisers of England are come to be present at the grand fight
+speedily coming off; there they are met in the precincts of the old town,
+near the field of the chapel, planted with tender saplings at the
+restoration of sporting Charles, which are now become venerable elms, as
+high as many a steeple; there they are met at a fitting rendezvous, where
+a retired coachman, with one leg, keeps an hotel and a bowling-green.  I
+think I now see them upon the bowling-green, the men of renown, amidst
+hundreds of people with no renown at all, who gaze upon them with timid
+wonder.  Fame, after all, is a glorious thing, though it lasts only for a
+day.  There's Cribb, the champion of England, and perhaps the best man in
+England; there he is, with his huge massive figure, and face wonderfully
+like that of a lion.  There is Belcher, the younger, not the mighty one,
+who is gone to his place, but the Teucer Belcher, the most scientific
+pugilist that ever entered a ring, only wanting strength to be, I won't
+say what.  He appears to walk before me now, as he did that evening, with
+his white hat, white greatcoat, thin genteel figure, springy step, and
+keen, determined eye.  Crosses him, what a contrast! grim, savage
+Shelton, who has a civil word for nobody, and a hard blow for
+anybody--hard! one blow, given with the proper play of his athletic arm,
+will unsense a giant.  Yonder individual, who strolls about with his
+hands behind him, supporting his brown coat lappets, under-sized, and who
+looks anything but what he is, is the king of the light weights, so
+called--Randall! the terrible Randall, who has Irish blood in his veins;
+not the better for that, nor the worse; and not far from him is his last
+antagonist, Ned Turner, who, though beaten by him, still thinks himself
+as good a man, in which he is, perhaps, right, for it was a near thing;
+and 'a better shentleman,' in which he is quite right, for he is a
+Welshman.  But how shall I name them all? they were there by dozens, and
+all tremendous in their way.  There was Bulldog Hudson, and fearless
+Scroggins, who beat the conqueror of Sam the Jew.  There was Black
+Richmond--no, he was not there, but I knew him well; he was the most
+dangerous of blacks, even with a broken thigh.  There was Purcell, who
+could never conquer till all seemed over with him.  There was--what!
+shall I name thee last? ay, why not?  I believe that thou art the last of
+all that strong family still above the sod, where mayst thou long
+continue--true piece of English stuff, Tom of Bedford--sharp as Winter,
+kind as Spring.
+
+Hail to thee, Tom of Bedford, or by whatever name it may please thee to
+be called, Spring or Winter.  Hail to thee, six-foot Englishman of the
+brown eye, worthy to have carried a six-foot bow at Flodden, where
+England's yeomen triumphed over Scotland's king, his clans and chivalry.
+Hail to thee, last of England's bruisers, after all the many victories
+which thou hast achieved--true English victories, unbought by yellow
+gold; need I recount them? nay, nay! they are already well known to
+fame--sufficient to say that Bristol's Bull and Ireland's Champion were
+vanquished by thee, and one mightier still, gold itself, thou didst
+overcome; for gold itself strove in vain to deaden the power of thy arm;
+and thus thou didst proceed till men left off challenging thee, the
+unvanquishable, the incorruptible.  'Tis a treat to see thee, Tom of
+Bedford, in thy 'public' in Holborn way, whither thou hast retired with
+thy well-earned bays.  'Tis Friday night, and nine by Holborn clock.
+There sits the yeoman at the end of his long room, surrounded by his
+friends; glasses are filled, and a song is the cry, and a song is sung
+well suited to the place; it finds an echo in every heart--fists are
+clenched, arms are waved, and the portraits of the mighty fighting men of
+yore, Broughton, and Slack, and Ben, which adorn the walls, appear to
+smile grim approbation, whilst many a manly voice joins in the bold
+chorus:
+
+   Here's a health to old honest John Bull,
+   When he's gone we shan't find such another,
+   And with hearts and with glasses brim full,
+   We will drink to old England, his mother.
+
+But the fight! with respect to the fight, what shall I say?  Little can
+be said about it--it was soon over; some said that the brave from town,
+who was reputed the best man of the two, and whose form was a perfect
+model of athletic beauty, allowed himself, for lucre vile, to be
+vanquished by the massive champion with the flattened nose.  One thing is
+certain, that the former was suddenly seen to sink to the earth before a
+blow of by no means extraordinary power.  Time, time! was called; but
+there he lay upon the ground apparently senseless, and from thence he did
+not lift his head till several seconds after the umpires had declared his
+adversary victor.
+
+There were shouts; indeed there's never a lack of shouts to celebrate a
+victory, however acquired; but there was also much grinding of teeth,
+especially amongst the fighting men from town.  'Tom has sold us,' said
+they, 'sold us to the yokels; who would have thought it?'  Then there was
+fresh grinding of teeth, and scowling brows were turned to the heaven;
+but what is this? is it possible, does the heaven scowl too? why, only a
+quarter of an hour ago . . . but what may not happen in a quarter of an
+hour?  For many weeks the weather had been of the most glorious
+description, the eventful day, too, had dawned gloriously, and so it had
+continued till some two hours after noon; the fight was then over; and
+about that time I looked up--what a glorious sky of deep blue, and what a
+big fierce sun swimming high above in the midst of that blue; not a
+cloud--there had not been one for weeks--not a cloud to be seen, only in
+the far west, just on the horizon, something like the extremity of a
+black wing; that was only a quarter of an hour ago, and now the whole
+northern side of the heaven is occupied by a huge black cloud, and the
+sun is only occasionally seen amidst masses of driving vapour; what a
+change! but another fight is at hand, and the pugilists are clearing the
+outer ring;--how their huge whips come crashing upon the heads of the
+yokels; blood flows, more blood than in the fight; those blows are given
+with right good-will, those are not sham blows, whether of whip or fist;
+it is with fist that grim Shelton strikes down the big yokel; he is
+always dangerous, grim Shelton, but now particularly so, for he has lost
+ten pounds betted on the brave who sold himself to the yokels; but the
+outer ring is cleared: and now the second fight commences; it is between
+two champions of less renown than the others, but is perhaps not the
+worse on that account.  A tall thin boy is fighting in the ring with a
+man somewhat under the middle size, with a frame of adamant; that's a
+gallant boy! he's a yokel, but he comes from Brummagem, and he does
+credit to his extraction; but his adversary has a frame of adamant: in
+what a strange light they fight, but who can wonder, on looking at that
+frightful cloud usurping now one-half of heaven, and at the sun
+struggling with sulphurous vapour; the face of the boy, which is turned
+towards me, looks horrible in that light, but he is a brave boy, he
+strikes his foe on the forehead, and the report of the blow is like the
+sound of a hammer against a rock; but there is a rush and a roar
+overhead, a wild commotion, the tempest is beginning to break loose;
+there's wind and dust, a crash, rain and hail; is it possible to fight
+amidst such a commotion? yes! the fight goes on; again the boy strikes
+the man full on the brow, but it is of no use striking that man, his
+frame is of adamant.  'Boy, thy strength is beginning to give way, and
+thou art becoming confused'; the man now goes to work, amidst rain and
+hail.  'Boy, thou wilt not hold out ten minutes longer against rain,
+hail, and the blows of such an antagonist.'
+
+And now the storm was at its height; the black thunder-cloud had broken
+into many, which assumed the wildest shapes and the strangest colours,
+some of them unspeakably glorious; the rain poured in a deluge, and more
+than one waterspout was seen at no great distance: an immense rabble is
+hurrying in one direction; a multitude of men of all ranks, peers and
+yokels, prize-fighters and Jews, and the last came to plunder, and are
+now plundering amidst that wild confusion of hail and rain, men and
+horses, carts and carriages.  But all hurry in one direction, through mud
+and mire; there's a town only three miles distant, which is soon reached,
+and soon filled, it will not contain one-third of that mighty rabble; but
+there's another town farther on--the good old city is farther on, only
+twelve miles; what's that! who will stay here? onward to the old town.
+
+Hurry-skurry, a mixed multitude of men and horses, carts and carriages,
+all in the direction of the old town; and, in the midst of all that mad
+throng, at a moment when the rain-gushes were coming down with particular
+fury, and the artillery of the sky was pealing as I had never heard it
+peal before, I felt some one seize me by the arm--I turned round, and
+beheld Mr. Petulengro.
+
+'I can't hear you, Mr. Petulengro,' said I; for the thunder drowned the
+words which he appeared to be uttering.
+
+'Dearginni,' I heard Mr. Petulengro say, 'it thundreth.  I was asking,
+brother, whether you believe in dukkeripens?'
+
+'I do not, Mr. Petulengro; but this is strange weather to be asking me
+whether I believe in fortunes.'
+
+'Grondinni,' said Mr. Petulengro, 'it haileth.  I believe in dukkeripens,
+brother.'
+
+'And who has more right,' said I; 'seeing that you live by them?  But
+this tempest is truly horrible.'
+
+'Dearginni, grondinni ta villaminni!  It thundreth, it haileth, and also
+flameth,' said Mr. Petulengro.  'Look up there, brother!'
+
+I looked up.  Connected with this tempest there was one feature to which
+I have already alluded--the wonderful colours of the clouds.  Some were
+of vivid green; others of the brightest orange; others as black as pitch.
+The gypsy's finger was pointed to a particular part of the sky.
+
+'What do you see there, brother?'
+
+'A strange kind of cloud.'
+
+'What does it look like, brother?'
+
+'Something like a stream of blood.'
+
+'That cloud foreshoweth a bloody dukkeripen.'
+
+'A bloody fortune!' said I.  'And whom may it betide?'
+
+'Who knows!' said the gypsy.
+
+Down the way, dashing and splashing, and scattering man, horse, and cart
+to the left and right, came an open barouche, drawn by four smoking
+steeds, with postilions in scarlet jackets and leather skull-caps.  Two
+forms were conspicuous in it; that of the successful bruiser, and of his
+friend and backer, the sporting gentleman of my acquaintance.
+
+'His!' said the gypsy, pointing to the latter, whose stern features wore
+a smile of triumph, as, probably recognising me in the crowd, he nodded
+in the direction of where I stood, as the barouche hurried by.
+
+There went the barouche, dashing through the rain-gushes, and in it one
+whose boast it was that he was equal to 'either fortune.'  Many have
+heard of that man--many may be desirous of knowing yet more of him.  I
+have nothing to do with that man's after life--he fulfilled his
+dukkeripen.  'A bad, violent man!'  Softly, friend; when thou wouldst
+speak harshly of the dead, remember that thou hast not yet fulfilled thy
+own dukkeripen!
+
+{picture:'That cloud foreshoweth a bloody dukkeripen.': page179.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVII
+
+
+My father--Premature decay--The easy-chair--A few questions--So you told
+me--A difficult language--They can it Haik--Misused
+opportunities--Saul--Want of candour--Don't weep--Heaven forgive me--Dated
+from Paris--I wish he were here--A father's reminiscences--Farewell to
+vanities.
+
+My father, as I have already informed the reader, had been endowed by
+nature with great corporeal strength; indeed, I have been assured that,
+at the period of his prime, his figure had denoted the possession of
+almost Herculean powers.  The strongest forms, however, do not always
+endure the longest, the very excess of the noble and generous juices
+which they contain being the cause of their premature decay.  But, be
+that as it may, the health of my father, some few years after his
+retirement from the service to the quiet of domestic life, underwent a
+considerable change; his constitution appeared to be breaking up; and he
+was subject to severe attacks from various disorders, with which, till
+then, he had been utterly unacquainted.  He was, however, wont to rally,
+more or less, after his illnesses, and might still occasionally be seen
+taking his walk, with his cane in his hand, and accompanied by his dog,
+who sympathised entirely with him, pining as he pined, improving as he
+improved, and never leaving the house save in his company; and in this
+manner matters went on for a considerable time, no very great
+apprehension with respect to my father's state being raised either in my
+mother's breast or my own.  But, about six months after the period at
+which I have arrived in my last chapter, it came to pass that my father
+experienced a severer attack than on any previous occasion.
+
+He had the best medical advice; but it was easy to see, from the looks of
+his doctors, that they entertained but slight hopes of his recovery.  His
+sufferings were great, yet he invariably bore them with unshaken
+fortitude.  There was one thing remarkable connected with his illness;
+notwithstanding its severity, it never confined him to his bed.  He was
+wont to sit in his little parlour, in his easy-chair, dressed in a faded
+regimental coat, his dog at his feet, who would occasionally lift his
+head from the hearth-rug on which he lay, and look his master wistfully
+in the face.  And thus my father spent the greater part of his time,
+sometimes in prayer, sometimes in meditation, and sometimes in reading
+the Scriptures.  I frequently sat with him, though, as I entertained a
+great awe for my father, I used to feel rather ill at ease, when, as
+sometimes happened, I found myself alone with him.
+
+'I wish to ask you a few questions,' said he to me one day, after my
+mother had left the room.
+
+'I will answer anything you may please to ask me, my dear father.'
+
+'What have you been about lately?'
+
+'I have been occupied as usual, attending at the office at the appointed
+hours.'
+
+'And what do you there?'
+
+'Whatever I am ordered.'
+
+'And nothing else?'
+
+'Oh yes! sometimes I read a book.'
+
+'Connected with your profession?'
+
+'Not always; I have been lately reading Armenian--'
+
+'What's that?'
+
+'The language of a people whose country is a region on the other side of
+Asia Minor.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'A region abounding with mountains.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'Amongst which is Mount Ararat.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'Upon which, as the Bible informs us, the ark rested.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'It is the language of the people of those regions--'
+
+'So you told me.'
+
+'And I have been reading the Bible in their language.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'Or rather, I should say, in the ancient language of these people; from
+which I am told the modem Armenian differs considerably.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'As much as the Italian from the Latin.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'So I have been reading the Bible in ancient Armenian.'
+
+'You told me so before.'
+
+'I found it a highly difficult language.'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'Differing widely from the languages in general with which I am
+acquainted.'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'Exhibiting, however, some features in common with them.'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'And sometimes agreeing remarkably in words with a certain strange wild
+speech with which I became acquainted--'
+
+'Irish?'
+
+'No, father, not Irish--with which I became acquainted by the greatest
+chance in the world.'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'But of which I need say nothing farther at present, and which I should
+not have mentioned but for that fact.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'Which I consider remarkable.'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'The Armenian is copious.'
+
+'Is it?'
+
+'With an alphabet of thirty-nine letters, but it is harsh and guttural.'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'Like the language of most mountainous people--the Armenians call it
+Haik.'
+
+'Do they?'
+
+'And themselves, Haik, also; they are a remarkable people, and, though
+their original habitation is the Mountain of Ararat, they are to be
+found, like the Jews, all over the world.'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'Well, father, that's all I can tell you about the Haiks, or Armenians.'
+
+'And what does it all amount to?'
+
+'Very little, father; indeed, there is very little known about the
+Armenians; their early history, in particular, is involved in
+considerable mystery.'
+
+'And, if you knew all that it was possible to know about them, to what
+would it amount? to what earthly purpose could you turn it? have you
+acquired any knowledge of your profession?'
+
+'Very little, father.'
+
+'Very little!  Have you acquired all in your power?'
+
+'I can't say that I have, father.'
+
+'And yet it was your duty to have done so.  But I see how it is, you have
+shamefully misused your opportunities; you are like one who, sent into
+the field to labour, passes his time in flinging stones at the birds of
+heaven.'
+
+'I would scorn to fling a stone at a bird, father.'
+
+'You know what I mean, and all too well, and this attempt to evade
+deserved reproof by feigned simplicity is quite in character with your
+general behaviour.  I have ever observed about you a want of frankness,
+which has distressed me; you never speak of what you are about, your
+hopes, or your projects, but cover yourself with mystery.  I never knew
+till the present moment that you were acquainted with Armenian.'
+
+'Because you never asked me, father; there's nothing to conceal in the
+matter--I will tell you in a moment how I came to learn Armenian.  A lady
+whom I met at one of Mrs. ---'s parties took a fancy to me, and has done
+me the honour to allow me to go and see her sometimes.  She is the widow
+of a rich clergyman, and on her husband's death came to this place to
+live, bringing her husband's library with her: I soon found my way to it,
+and examined every book.  Her husband must have been a learned man, for
+amongst much Greek and Hebrew I found several volumes in Armenian, or
+relating to the language.'
+
+'And why did you not tell me of this before?'
+
+'Because you never questioned me; but, I repeat, there is nothing to
+conceal in the matter.  The lady took a fancy to me, and, being fond of
+the arts, drew my portrait; she said the expression of my countenance put
+her in mind of Alfieri's Saul.'
+
+'And do you still visit her?'
+
+'No, she soon grew tired of me, and told people that she found me very
+stupid; she gave me the Armenian books, however.'
+
+'Saul,' said my father, musingly, 'Saul.  I am afraid she was only too
+right there; he disobeyed the commands of his master, and brought down on
+his head the vengeance of Heaven--he became a maniac, prophesied, and
+flung weapons about him.'
+
+'He was, indeed, an awful character--I hope I shan't turn out like him.'
+
+'God forbid!' said my father, solemnly; 'but in many respects you are
+headstrong and disobedient like him.  I placed you in a profession, and
+besought you to make yourself master of it by giving it your undivided
+attention.  This, however, you did not do, you know nothing of it, but
+tell me that you are acquainted with Armenian; but what I dislike most is
+your want of candour--you are my son, but I know little of your real
+history, you may know fifty things for what I am aware: you may know how
+to shoe a horse for what I am aware.'
+
+'Not only to shoe a horse, father, but to make horse-shoes.'
+
+'Perhaps so,' said my father; 'and it only serves to prove what I was
+just saying, that I know little about you.'
+
+'But you easily may, my dear father; I will tell you anything that you
+may wish to know--shall I inform you how I learnt to make horse-shoes?'
+
+'No,' said my father; 'as you kept it a secret so long, it may as well
+continue so still.  Had you been a frank, open-hearted boy, like one I
+could name, you would have told me all about it of your own accord.  But
+I now wish to ask you a serious question--what do you propose to do?'
+
+'To do, father?'
+
+'Yes! the time for which you were articled to your profession will soon
+be expired, and I shall be no more.'
+
+'Do not talk so, my dear father; I have no doubt that you will soon be
+better.'
+
+'Do not flatter yourself; I feel that my days are numbered, I am soon
+going to my rest, and I have need of rest, for I am weary.  There, there,
+don't weep!  Tears will help me as little as they will you; you have not
+yet answered my question.  Tell me what you intend to do?'
+
+'I really do not know what I shall do.'
+
+'The military pension which I enjoy will cease with my life.  The
+property which I shall leave behind me will be barely sufficient for the
+maintenance of your mother respectably.  I again ask you what you intend
+to do.  Do you think you can support yourself by your Armenian or your
+other acquirements?'
+
+'Alas!  I think little at all about it; but I suppose I must push into
+the world, and make a good fight, as becomes the son of him who fought
+Big Ben; if I can't succeed, and am driven to the worst, it is but
+dying--'
+
+'What do you mean by dying?'
+
+'Leaving the world; my loss would scarcely be felt.  I have never held
+life in much value, and every one has a right to dispose as he thinks
+best of that which is his own.'
+
+'Ah! now I understand you; and well I know how and where you imbibed that
+horrible doctrine, and many similar ones which I have heard from your
+mouth; but I wish not to reproach you--I view in your conduct a
+punishment for my own sins, and I bow to the will of God.  Few and evil
+have been my days upon the earth; little have I done to which I can look
+back with satisfaction.  It is true I have served my king fifty years,
+and I have fought with--Heaven forgive me, what was I about to say!--but
+you mentioned the man's name, and our minds willingly recall our ancient
+follies.  Few and evil have been my days upon earth, I may say with Jacob
+of old, though I do not mean to say that my case is so hard as his; he
+had many undutiful children, whilst I have only ---; but I will not
+reproach you.  I have also like him a son to whom I can look with hope,
+who may yet preserve my name when I am gone, so let me be thankful;
+perhaps, after all, I have not lived in vain.  Boy, when I am gone, look
+up to your brother, and may God bless you both!  There, don't weep; but
+take the Bible, and read me something about the old man and his
+children.'
+
+My brother had now been absent for the space of three years.  At first
+his letters had been frequent, and from them it appeared that he was
+following his profession in London with industry; they then became rather
+rare, and my father did not always communicate their contents.  His last
+letter, however, had filled him and our whole little family with joy; it
+was dated from Paris, and the writer was evidently in high spirits.  After
+describing in eloquent terms the beauties and gaieties of the French
+capital, he informed us how he had plenty of money, having copied a
+celebrated picture of one of the Italian masters for a Hungarian
+nobleman, for which he had received a large sum.  'He wishes me to go
+with him to Italy,' added he, 'but I am fond of independence; and, if
+ever I visit old Rome, I will have no patrons near me to distract my
+attention.'  But six months had now elapsed from the date of this letter,
+and we had heard no further intelligence of my brother.  My father's
+complaint increased; the gout, his principal enemy, occasionally mounted
+high up in his system, and we had considerable difficulty in keeping it
+from the stomach, where it generally proves fatal.  I now devoted almost
+the whole of my time to my father, on whom his faithful partner also
+lavished every attention and care.  I read the Bible to him, which was
+his chief delight; and also occasionally such other books as I thought
+might prove entertaining to him.  His spirits were generally rather
+depressed.  The absence of my brother appeared to prey upon his mind.  'I
+wish he were here,' he would frequently exclaim; 'I can't imagine what
+can have become of him; I trust, however, he will arrive in time.'  He
+still sometimes rallied, and I took advantage of those moments of
+comparative ease to question him upon the events of his early life.  My
+attentions to him had not passed unnoticed, and he was kind, fatherly,
+and unreserved.  I had never known my father so entertaining as at these
+moments, when his life was but too evidently drawing to a close.  I had
+no idea that he knew and had seen so much; my respect for him increased,
+and I looked upon him almost with admiration.  His anecdotes were in
+general highly curious; some of them related to people in the highest
+stations, and to men whose names were closely connected with some of the
+brightest glories of our native land.  He had frequently conversed--almost
+on terms of familiarity--with good old George.  He had known the
+conqueror of Tippoo Saib; and was the friend of Townshend, who, when
+Wolfe fell, led the British grenadiers against the shrinking regiments of
+Montcalm.  'Pity,' he added, 'that when old--old as I am now--he should
+have driven his own son mad by robbing him of his plighted bride; but so
+it was; he married his son's bride.  I saw him lead her to the altar; if
+ever there was an angelic countenance, it was that girl's; she was almost
+too fair to be one of the daughters of women.  Is there anything, boy,
+that you would wish to ask me? now is the time.'
+
+'Yes, father; there is one about whom I would fain question you.'
+
+'Who is it? shall I tell you about Elliot?'
+
+'No, father, not about Elliot; but pray don't be angry; I should like to
+know something about Big Ben.'
+
+'You are a strange lad,' said my father; 'and, though of late I have
+begun to entertain a more favourable opinion than heretofore, there is
+still much about you that I do not understand.  Why do you bring up that
+name?  Don't you know that it is one of my temptations: you wish to know
+something about him.  Well!  I will oblige you this once, and then
+farewell to such vanities--something about him.  I will tell you--his--skin
+when he flung off his clothes--and he had a particular knack in doing
+so--his skin, when he bared his mighty chest and back for combat; and
+when he fought he stood, so . . . . if I remember right--his skin, I say,
+was brown and dusky as that of a toad.  Oh me!  I wish my elder son was
+here.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVIII
+
+
+My brother's arrival--The interview--Night--A dying father--Christ.
+
+At last my brother arrived; he looked pale and unwell; I met him at the
+door.  'You have been long absent,' said I.
+
+'Yes,' said he, 'perhaps too long; but how is my father?'
+
+'Very poorly,' said I, 'he has had a fresh attack; but where have you
+been of late?'
+
+'Far and wide,' said my brother; 'but I can't tell you anything now, I
+must go to my father.  It was only by chance that I heard of his
+illness.'
+
+'Stay a moment,' said I.  'Is the world such a fine place as you supposed
+it to be before you went away?'
+
+'Not quite,' said my brother, 'not quite; indeed I wish--but ask me no
+questions now, I must hasten to my father.'  There was another question
+on my tongue, but I forbore; for the eyes of the young man were full of
+tears.  I pointed with my finger, and the young man hastened past me to
+the arms of his father.
+
+I forbore to ask my brother whether he had been to old Rome.
+
+What passed between my father and brother I do not know; the interview,
+no doubt, was tender enough, for they tenderly loved each other; but my
+brother's arrival did not produce the beneficial effect upon my father
+which I at first hoped it would; it did not even appear to have raised
+his spirits.  He was composed enough, however: 'I ought to be grateful,'
+said he; 'I wished to see my son, and God has granted me my wish; what
+more have I to do now than to bless my little family and go?'
+
+My father's end was evidently at hand.
+
+And did I shed no tears? did I breathe no sighs? did I never wring my
+hands at this period? the reader will perhaps be asking.  Whatever I did
+and thought is best known to God and myself; but it will be as well to
+observe, that it is possible to feel deeply, and yet make no outward
+sign.
+
+And now for the closing scene.
+
+At the dead hour of night, it might be about two, I was awakened from
+sleep by a cry which sounded from the room immediately below that in
+which I slept.  I knew the cry, it was the cry of my mother; and I also
+knew its import, yet I made no effort to rise, for I was for the moment
+paralysed.  Again the cry sounded, yet still I lay motionless--the
+stupidity of horror was upon me.  A third time, and it was then that, by
+a violent effort, bursting the spell which appeared to bind me, I sprang
+from the bed and rushed downstairs.  My mother was running wildly about
+the room; she had awoke, and found my father senseless in the bed by her
+side.  I essayed to raise him, and after a few efforts supported him in
+the bed in a sitting posture.  My brother now rushed in, and, snatching
+up a light that was burning, he held it to my father's face.  'The
+surgeon, the surgeon!' he cried; then, dropping the light, he ran out of
+the room followed by my mother; I remained alone, supporting the
+senseless form of my father; the light had been extinguished by the fall,
+and an almost total darkness reigned in the room.  The form pressed
+heavily against my bosom--at last methought it moved.  Yes, I was right,
+there was a heaving of the breast, and then a gasping.  Were those words
+which I heard?  Yes, they were words, low and indistinct at first, and
+then audible.  The mind of the dying man was reverting to former scenes.
+I heard him mention names which I had often heard him mention before.  It
+was an awful moment; I felt stupefied, but I still contrived to support
+my dying father.  There was a pause, again my father spoke: I heard him
+speak of Minden, and of Meredith, the old Minden sergeant, and then he
+uttered another name, which at one period of his life was much in his
+lips, the name of . . . but this is a solemn moment!  There was a deep
+gasp: I shook, and thought all was over; but I was mistaken--my father
+moved, and revived for a moment; he supported himself in bed without my
+assistance.  I make no doubt that for a moment he was perfectly sensible,
+and it was then that, clasping his hands, he uttered another name
+clearly, distinctly--it was the name of Christ.  With that name upon his
+lips, the brave old soldier sank back upon my bosom, and, with his hands
+still clasped, yielded up his soul.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIX
+
+
+The greeting--Queer figure--Cheer up--The cheerful fire--It will do--The
+sally forth--Trepidation--Let him come in.
+
+'One-and-ninepence, sir, or the things which you have brought with you
+will be taken away from you!'
+
+Such were the first words which greeted my ears, one damp misty morning
+in March, as I dismounted from the top of a coach in the yard of a London
+inn.
+
+I turned round, for I felt that the words were addressed to myself.
+Plenty of people were in the yard--porters, passengers, coachmen,
+hostlers, and others, who appeared to be intent on anything but myself,
+with the exception of one individual, whose business appeared to lie with
+me, and who now confronted me at the distance of about two yards.
+
+I looked hard at the man--and a queer kind of individual he was to look
+at--a rakish figure, about thirty, and of the middle size, dressed in a
+coat smartly cut, but threadbare, very tight pantaloons of blue stuff,
+tied at the ankles, dirty white stockings and thin shoes, like those of a
+dancing-master; his features were not ugly, but rather haggard, and he
+appeared to owe his complexion less to nature than carmine; in fact, in
+every respect, a very queer figure.
+
+'One-and-ninepence, sir, or your things will be taken away from you!' he
+said, in a kind of lisping tone, coming yet nearer to me.
+
+I still remained staring fixedly at him, but never a word answered.  Our
+eyes met; whereupon he suddenly lost the easy impudent air which he
+before wore.  He glanced, for a moment, at my fist, which I had by this
+time clenched, and his features became yet more haggard; he faltered; a
+fresh 'one-and-ninepence,' which he was about to utter, died on his lips;
+he shrank back, disappeared behind a coach, and I saw no more of him.
+
+'One-and-ninepence, or my things will be taken away from me!' said I to
+myself, musingly, as I followed the porter to whom I had delivered my
+scanty baggage; 'am I to expect many of these greetings in the big world?
+Well, never mind!  I think I know the counter-sign!'  And I clenched my
+fist yet harder than before.
+
+So I followed the porter, through the streets of London, to a lodging
+which had been prepared for me by an acquaintance.  The morning, as I
+have before said, was gloomy, and the streets through which I passed were
+dank and filthy; the people, also, looked dank and filthy; and so,
+probably, did I, for the night had been rainy, and I had come upwards of
+a hundred miles on the top of a coach; my heart had sunk within me, by
+the time we reached a dark narrow street, in which was the lodging.
+
+'Cheer up, young man,' said the porter, 'we shall have a fine afternoon!'
+
+And presently I found myself in the lodging which had been prepared for
+me.  It consisted of a small room, up two pair of stairs, in which I was
+to sit, and another still smaller above it, in which I was to sleep.  I
+remember that I sat down, and looked disconsolate about me--everything
+seemed so cold and dingy.  Yet how little is required to make a
+situation--however cheerless at first sight--cheerful and comfortable.
+The people of the house, who looked kindly upon me, lighted a fire in the
+dingy grate; and, then, what a change!--the dingy room seemed dingy no
+more!  Oh the luxury of a cheerful fire after a chill night's journey!  I
+drew near to the blazing grate, rubbed my hands, and felt glad.
+
+And, when I had warmed myself, I turned to the table, on which, by this
+time, the people of the house had placed my breakfast; and I ate and I
+drank; and, as I ate and drank, I mused within myself, and my eyes were
+frequently directed to a small green box, which constituted part of my
+luggage, and which, with the rest of my things, stood in one corner of
+the room, till at last, leaving my breakfast unfinished, I rose, and,
+going to the box, unlocked it, and took out two or three bundles of
+papers tied with red tape, and, placing them on the table, I resumed my
+seat and my breakfast, my eyes intently fixed upon the bundles of papers
+all the time.
+
+And when I had drained the last cup of tea out of a dingy teapot, and ate
+the last slice of the dingy loaf, I untied one of the bundles, and
+proceeded to look over the papers, which were closely written over in a
+singular hand, and I read for some time, till at last I said to myself,
+'It will do.'  And then I looked at the other bundle for some time
+without untying it; and at last I said, 'It will do also.'  And then I
+turned to the fire, and, putting my feet against the sides of the grate,
+I leaned back on my chair, and, with my eyes upon the fire, fell into
+deep thought.
+
+And there I continued in thought before the fire, until my eyes closed,
+and I fell asleep; which was not to be wondered at, after the fatigue and
+cold which I had lately undergone on the coach-top; and, in my sleep, I
+imagined myself still there, amidst darkness and rain, hurrying now over
+wild heaths, and now along roads overhung with thick and umbrageous
+trees, and sometimes methought I heard the horn of the guard, and
+sometimes the voice of the coachman, now chiding, now encouraging his
+horses, as they toiled through the deep and miry ways.  At length a
+tremendous crack of a whip saluted the tympanum of my ear, and I started
+up broad awake, nearly oversetting the chair on which I reclined--and lo!
+I was in the dingy room before the fire, which was by this time half
+extinguished.  In my dream I had confounded the noise of the street with
+those of my night journey; the crack which had aroused me I soon found
+proceeded from the whip of a carter, who, with many oaths, was flogging
+his team below the window.
+
+Looking at a clock which stood upon the mantelpiece, I perceived that it
+was past eleven; whereupon I said to myself, 'I am wasting my time
+foolishly and unprofitably, forgetting that I am now in the big world,
+without anything to depend upon save my own exertions'; and then I
+adjusted my dress, and, locking up the bundle of papers which I had not
+read, I tied up the other, and, taking it under my arm, I went
+downstairs; and, after asking a question or two of the people of the
+house, I sallied forth into the street with a determined look, though at
+heart I felt somewhat timorous at the idea of venturing out alone into
+the mazes of the mighty city, of which I had heard much, but of which, of
+my own knowledge, I knew nothing.
+
+{picture:I sprang up the steps, and gave a loud rap: page192.jpg}
+
+I had, however, no great cause for anxiety in the present instance; I
+easily found my way to the place which I was in quest of--one of the many
+new squares on the northern side of the metropolis, and which was
+scarcely ten minutes' walk from the street in which I had taken up my
+abode.  Arriving before the door of a tolerably large house which bore a
+certain number, I stood still for a moment in a kind of trepidation,
+looking anxiously at the door; I then slowly passed on till I came to the
+end of the square, where I stood still, and pondered for a while.
+Suddenly, however, like one who has formed a resolution, I clenched my
+right hand, flinging my hat somewhat on one side, and, turning back with
+haste to the door before which I had stopped, I sprang up the steps, and
+gave a loud rap, ringing at the same time the bell of the area.  After
+the lapse of a minute the door was opened by a maid-servant of no very
+cleanly or prepossessing appearance, of whom I demanded, in a tone of
+some hauteur, whether the master of the house was at home.  Glancing for
+a moment at the white paper bundle beneath my arm, the handmaid made no
+reply in words, but, with a kind of toss of her head, flung the door
+open, standing on one side as if to let me enter.  I did enter; and the
+hand-maid, having opened another door on the right hand, went in, and
+said something which I could not hear: after a considerable pause,
+however, I heard the voice of a man say, 'Let him come in'; whereupon the
+handmaid, coming out, motioned me to enter, and, on my obeying, instantly
+closed the door behind me.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXX
+
+
+The sinister glance--Excellent correspondent--Quite original--My system--A
+losing trade--Merit--Starting a Review--What have you
+got?--Stop!--_Dairyman's Daughter_--Oxford principles--More
+conversation--How is this?
+
+There were two individuals in the room in which I now found myself; it
+was a small study, surrounded with bookcases, the window looking out upon
+the square.  Of these individuals he who appeared to be the principal
+stood with his back to the fireplace.  He was a tall stout man, about
+sixty, dressed in a loose morning gown.  The expression of his
+countenance would have been bluff but for a certain sinister glance, and
+his complexion might have been called rubicund but for a considerable
+tinge of bilious yellow.  He eyed me askance as I entered.  The other, a
+pale, shrivelled-looking person, sat at a table apparently engaged with
+an account-book; he took no manner of notice of me, never once lifting
+his eyes from the page before him.
+
+'Well, sir, what is your pleasure?' said the big man, in a rough tone, as
+I stood there, looking at him wistfully--as well I might--for upon that
+man, at the time of which I am speaking, my principal, I may say my only,
+hopes rested.
+
+'Sir,' said I, 'my name is so-and-so, and I am the bearer of a letter to
+you from Mr. so-and-so, an old friend and correspondent of yours.'
+
+The countenance of the big man instantly lost the suspicious and lowering
+expression which it had hitherto exhibited; he strode forward, and,
+seizing me by the hand, gave me a violent squeeze.
+
+'My dear sir,' said he, 'I am rejoiced to see you in London.  I have been
+long anxious for the pleasure--we are old friends, though we have never
+before met.  Taggart,' said he to the man who sat at the desk, 'this is
+our excellent correspondent, the friend and pupil of our other excellent
+correspondent.'
+
+The pale, shrivelled-looking man slowly and deliberately raised his head
+from the account-book, and surveyed me for a moment or two; not the
+slightest emotion was observable in his countenance.  It appeared to me,
+however, that I could detect a droll twinkle in his eye: his curiosity,
+if he had any, was soon gratified; he made me a kind of bow, pulled out a
+snuff-box, took a pinch of snuff, and again bent his head over the page.
+
+'And now, my dear sir,' said the big man, 'pray sit down, and tell me the
+cause of your visit.  I hope you intend to remain here a day or two.'
+
+'More than that,' said I, 'I am come to take up my abode in London.'
+
+'Glad to hear it; and what have you been about of late? got anything
+which will suit me?  Sir, I admire your style of writing, and your manner
+of thinking; and I am much obliged to my good friend and correspondent
+for sending me some of your productions.  I inserted them all, and wished
+there had been more of them--quite original, sir, quite: took with the
+public, especially the essay about the non-existence of anything.  I
+don't exactly agree with you though; I have my own peculiar ideas about
+matter--as you know, of course, from the book I have published.
+Nevertheless, a very pretty piece of speculative philosophy--no such
+thing as matter--impossible that there should be--_ex nihilo_--what is
+the Greek?  I have forgot--very pretty indeed; very original.'
+
+'I am afraid, sir, it was very wrong to write such trash, and yet more to
+allow it to be published.'
+
+'Trash! not at all; a very pretty piece of speculative philosophy; of
+course you were wrong in saying there is no world.  The world must exist,
+to have the shape of a pear; and that the world is shaped like a pear,
+and not like an apple, as the fools of Oxford say, I have satisfactorily
+proved in my book.  Now, if there were no world, what would become of my
+system?  But what do you propose to do in London?'
+
+'Here is the letter, sir,' said I, 'of our good friend, which I have not
+yet given to you; I believe it will explain to you the circumstances
+under which I come.'
+
+He took the letter, and perused it with attention.  'Hem!' said he, with
+a somewhat altered manner, 'my friend tells me that you are come up to
+London with the view of turning your literary talents to account, and
+desires me to assist you in my capacity of publisher in bringing forth
+two or three works which you have prepared.  My good friend is perhaps
+not aware that for some time past I have given up publishing--was obliged
+to do so--had many severe losses--do nothing at present in that line,
+save sending out the Magazine once a month; and, between ourselves, am
+thinking of disposing of that--wish to retire--high time at my age--so
+you see--'
+
+'I am very sorry, sir, to hear that you cannot assist me' (and I remember
+that I felt very nervous); 'I had hoped--'
+
+'A losing trade, I assure you, sir; literature is a drug.  Taggart, what
+o'clock is?'
+
+'Well, sir!' said I, rising, 'as you cannot assist me, I will now take my
+leave; I thank you sincerely for your kind reception, and will trouble
+you no longer.'
+
+'Oh, don't go.  I wish to have some further conversation with you; and
+perhaps I may hit upon some plan to benefit you.  I honour merit, and
+always make a point to encourage it when I can; but--Taggart, go to the
+bank, and tell them to dishonour the bill twelve months after date for
+thirty pounds which becomes due to-morrow.  I am dissatisfied with that
+fellow who wrote the fairy tales, and intend to give him all the trouble
+in my power.  Make haste.'
+
+Taggart did not appear to be in any particular haste.  First of all, he
+took a pinch of snuff, then, rising from his chair, slowly and
+deliberately drew his wig, for he wore a wig of a brown colour, rather
+more over his forehead than it had previously been, buttoned his coat,
+and, taking his hat, and an umbrella which stood in a corner, made me a
+low bow, and quitted the room.
+
+'Well, sir, where were we?  Oh, I remember, we were talking about merit.
+Sir, I always wish to encourage merit, especially when it comes so highly
+recommended as in the present instance.  Sir, my good friend and
+correspondent speaks of you in the highest terms.  Sir, I honour my good
+friend, and have the highest respect for his opinion in all matters
+connected with literature--rather eccentric though.  Sir, my good friend
+has done my periodical more good and more harm than all the rest of my
+correspondents.  Sir, I shall never forget the sensation caused by the
+appearance of his article about a certain personage whom he proved--and I
+think satisfactorily--to have been a legionary soldier--rather startling,
+was it not?  The S--- of the world a common soldier, in a marching
+regiment--original, but startling; sir, I honour my good friend.'
+
+'So you have renounced publishing, sir,' said I, 'with the exception of
+the Magazine?'
+
+'Why, yes; except now and then, under the rose; the old coachman, you
+know, likes to hear the whip.  Indeed, at the present moment, I am
+thinking of starting a Review on an entirely new and original principle;
+and it just struck me that you might be of high utility in the
+undertaking--what do you think of the matter?'
+
+'I should be happy, sir, to render you any assistance, but I am afraid
+the employment you propose requires other qualifications than I possess;
+however, I can make the essay.  My chief intention in coming to London
+was to lay before the world what I had prepared; and I had hoped by your
+assistance--'
+
+'Ah!  I see, ambition!  Ambition is a very pretty thing; but, sir, we
+must walk before we run, according to the old saying--what is that you
+have got under your arm?'
+
+'One of the works to which I was alluding; the one, indeed, which I am
+most anxious to lay before the world, as I hope to derive from it both
+profit and reputation.'
+
+'Indeed! what do you call it?'
+
+'Ancient songs of Denmark, heroic and romantic, translated by myself;
+with notes philological, critical, and historical.'
+
+'Then, sir, I assure you that your time and labour have been entirely
+flung away; nobody would read your ballads, if you were to give them to
+the world to-morrow.'
+
+'I am sure, sir, that you would say otherwise if you would permit me to
+read one to you'; and, without waiting for the answer of the big man, nor
+indeed so much as looking at him, to see whether he was inclined or not
+to hear me, I undid my manuscript, and, with a voice trembling with
+eagerness, I read to the following effect:--
+
+   Buckshank bold and Elfinstone,
+   And more than I can mention here,
+   They caused to be built so stout a ship,
+   And unto Iceland they would steer.
+
+   They launched the ship upon the main,
+   Which bellowed like a wrathful bear;
+   Down to the bottom the vessel sank,
+   A laidly Trold has dragged it there.
+
+   Down to the bottom sank young Roland,
+   And round about he groped awhile;
+   Until he found the path which led
+   Unto the bower of Ellenlyle.
+
+'Stop!' said the publisher; 'very pretty indeed, and very original; beats
+Scott hollow, and Percy too: but, sir, the day for these things is gone
+by; nobody at present cares for Percy, nor for Scott either, save as a
+novelist; sorry to discourage merit, sir, but what can I do!  What else
+have you got?'
+
+'The songs of Ab Gwilym, the Welsh bard, also translated by myself, with
+notes critical, philological, and historical.'
+
+'Pass on--what else?'
+
+'Nothing else,' said I, folding up my manuscript with a sigh, 'unless it
+be a romance in the German style; on which, I confess, I set very little
+value.'
+
+'Wild?'
+
+'Yes, sir, very wild.'
+
+'Like the Miller of the Black Valley?'
+
+'Yes, sir, very much like the Miller of the Black Valley.'
+
+'Well, that's better,' said the publisher; 'and yet, I don't know, I
+question whether any one at present cares for the miller himself.  No,
+sir, the time for those things is also gone by; German, at present, is a
+drug; and, between ourselves, nobody has contributed to make it so more
+than my good friend and correspondent;--but, sir, I see you are a young
+gentleman of infinite merit, and I always wish to encourage merit.  Don't
+you think you could write a series of evangelical tales?'
+
+'Evangelical tales, sir?'
+
+'Yes, sir, evangelical novels.'
+
+'Something in the style of Herder?'
+
+'Herder is a drug, sir; nobody cares for Herder--thanks to my good
+friend.  Sir, I have in yon drawer a hundred pages about Herder, which I
+dare not insert in my periodical; it would sink it, sir.  No, sir,
+something in the style of the _Dairyman's Daughter_.'
+
+'I never heard of the work till the present moment.'
+
+'Then, sir, procure it by all means.  Sir, I could afford as much as ten
+pounds for a well-written tale in the style of the _Dairyman's Daughter_;
+that is the kind of literature, sir, that sells at the present day!  It
+is not the Miller of the Black Valley--no, sir, nor Herder either, that
+will suit the present taste; the evangelical body is becoming very
+strong, sir; the canting scoundrels--'
+
+'But, sir, surely you would not pander to a scoundrelly taste?'
+
+'Then, sir, I must give up business altogether.  Sir, I have a great
+respect for the goddess Reason--an infinite respect, sir; indeed, in my
+time, I have made a great many sacrifices for her; but, sir, I cannot
+altogether ruin myself for the goddess Reason.  Sir, I am a friend to
+Liberty, as is well known; but I must also be a friend to my own family.
+It is with the view of providing for a son of mine that I am about to
+start the Review of which I was speaking.  He has taken into his head to
+marry, sir, and I must do something for him, for he can do but little for
+himself.  Well, sir, I am a friend to Liberty, as I said before, and
+likewise a friend to Reason; but I tell you frankly that the Review which
+I intend to get up under the rose, and present him with when it is
+established, will be conducted on Oxford principles.'
+
+'Orthodox principles, I suppose you mean, sir?'
+
+'I do, sir; I am no linguist, but I believe the words are synonymous.'
+
+Much more conversation passed between us, and it was agreed that I should
+become a contributor to the Oxford Review.  I stipulated, however, that,
+as I knew little of politics, and cared less, no other articles should be
+required from me than such as were connected with belles-lettres and
+philology; to this the big man readily assented.  'Nothing will be
+required from you,' said he, 'but what you mention; and now and then,
+perhaps, a paper on metaphysics.  You understand German, and perhaps it
+would be desirable that you should review Kant; and in a review of Kant,
+sir, you could introduce to advantage your peculiar notions about _ex
+nihilo_.'  He then reverted to the subject of the _Dairyman's Daughter_,
+which I promised to take into consideration.  As I was going away, he
+invited me to dine with him on the ensuing Sunday.
+
+'That's a strange man!' said I to myself, after I had left the house; 'he
+is evidently very clever; but I cannot say that I like him much, with his
+Oxford Reviews and Dairyman's Daughters.  But what can I do?  I am almost
+without a friend in the world.  I wish I could find some one who would
+publish my ballads, or my songs of Ab Gwilym.  In spite of what the big
+man says, I am convinced that, once published, they would bring me much
+fame and profit.  But how is this?--what a beautiful sun!--the porter was
+right in saying that the day would clear up--I will now go to my dingy
+lodging, lock up my manuscripts, and then take a stroll about the big
+city.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXI
+
+
+The walk--London's Cheape--Street of the Lombards--Strange bridge--Main
+arch--The roaring gulf--The boat--Cly-faking--A comfort--The book--The
+blessed woman--No trap.
+
+So I set out on my walk to see the wonders of the big city, and, as
+chance would have it, I directed my course to the east.  The day, as I
+have already said, had become very fine, so that I saw the great city to
+advantage, and the wonders thereof: and much I admired all I saw; and,
+amongst other things, the huge cathedral, standing so proudly on the most
+commanding ground in the big city; and I looked up to the mighty dome,
+surmounted by a golden cross, and I said within myself, 'That dome must
+needs be the finest in the world'; and I gazed upon it till my eyes
+reeled, and my brain became dizzy, and I thought that the dome would fall
+and crush me; and I shrank within myself, and struck yet deeper into the
+heart of the big city.
+
+'O Cheapside! Cheapside!' said I, as I advanced up that mighty
+thoroughfare, 'truly thou art a wonderful place for hurry, noise, and
+riches!  Men talk of the bazaars of the East--I have never seen them--but
+I daresay that, compared with thee, they are poor places, silent places,
+abounding with empty boxes, O thou pride of London's east!--mighty mart
+of old renown!--for thou art not a place of yesterday:--long before the
+Roses red and white battled in fair England, thou didst exist--a place of
+throng and bustle--place of gold and silver, perfumes and fine linen.
+Centuries ago thou couldst extort the praises even of the fiercest foes
+of England.  Fierce bards of Wales, sworn foes of England, sang thy
+praises centuries ago; and even the fiercest of them all, Red Julius
+himself, wild Glendower's bard, had a word of praise for London's
+'Cheape,' for so the bards of Wales styled thee in their flowing odes.
+Then, if those who were not English, and hated England, and all connected
+therewith, had yet much to say in thy praise, when thou wast far inferior
+to what thou art now, why should true-born Englishmen, or those who call
+themselves so, turn up their noses at thee, and scoff thee at the present
+day, as I believe they do?  But, let others do as they will, I, at least,
+who am not only an Englishman, but an East Englishman, will not turn up
+my nose at thee, but will praise and extol thee, calling thee mart of the
+world--a place of wonder and astonishment!--and, were it right and
+fitting to wish that anything should endure for ever, I would say
+prosperity to Cheapside, throughout all ages--may it be the world's
+resort for merchandise, world without end.
+
+And when I had passed through the Cheape I entered another street, which
+led up a kind of ascent, and which proved to be the street of the
+Lombards, called so from the name of its first founders; and I walked
+rapidly up the street of the Lombards, neither looking to the right nor
+left, for it had no interest for me, though I had a kind of consciousness
+that mighty things were being transacted behind its walls: but it wanted
+the throng, bustle, and outward magnificence of the Cheape, and it had
+never been spoken of by 'ruddy bards'!  And, when I had got to the end of
+the street of the Lombards, I stood still for some time, deliberating
+within myself whether I should turn to the right or the left, or go
+straight forward, and at last I turned to the right, down a street of
+rapid descent, and presently found myself upon a bridge which traversed
+the river which runs by the big city.
+
+A strange kind of bridge it was; huge and massive, and seemingly of great
+antiquity.  It had an arched back, like that of a hog, a high balustrade,
+and at either side, at intervals, were stone bowers bulking over the
+river, but open on the other side, and furnished with a semicircular
+bench.  Though the bridge was wide--very wide--it was all too narrow for
+the concourse upon it.  Thousands of human beings were pouring over the
+bridge.  But what chiefly struck my attention was a double row of carts
+and wagons, the generality drawn by horses as large as elephants, each
+row striving hard in a different direction, and not unfrequently brought
+to a stand-still.  Oh the cracking of whips, the shouts and oaths of the
+carters, and the grating of wheels upon the enormous stones that formed
+the pavement!  In fact, there was a wild hurly-burly upon the bridge,
+which nearly deafened me.  But, if upon the bridge there was a confusion,
+below it there was a confusion ten times confounded.  The tide, which was
+fast ebbing, obstructed by the immense piers of the old bridge, poured
+beneath the arches with a fall of several feet, forming in the river
+below as many whirlpools as there were arches.  Truly tremendous was the
+roar of the descending waters, and the bellow of the tremendous gulfs,
+which swallowed them for a time, and then cast them forth, foaming and
+frothing from their horrid wombs.  Slowly advancing along the bridge, I
+came to the highest point, and there I stood still, close beside one of
+the stone bowers, in which, beside a fruit-stall, sat an old woman, with
+a pan of charcoal at her feet, and a book in her hand, in which she
+appeared to be reading intently.  There I stood, just above the principal
+arch, looking through the balustrade at the scene that presented
+itself--and such a scene!  Towards the left bank of the river, a forest
+of masts, thick and close, as far as the eye could reach; spacious
+wharfs, surmounted with gigantic edifices; and, far away, Caesar's
+Castle, with its White Tower.  To the right, another forest of masts, and
+a maze of buildings, from which, here and there, shot up to the sky
+chimneys taller than Cleopatra's Needle, vomiting forth huge wreaths of
+that black smoke which forms the canopy--occasionally a gorgeous one--of
+the more than Babel city.  Stretching before me, the troubled breast of
+the mighty river, and, immediately below, the main whirlpool of the
+Thames--the Maelstrom of the bulwarks of the middle arch--a grisly pool,
+which, with its superabundance of horror, fascinated me.  Who knows but I
+should have leapt into its depths?--I have heard of such things--but for
+a rather startling occurrence which broke the spell.  As I stood upon the
+bridge, gazing into the jaws of the pool, a small boat shot suddenly
+through the arch beneath my feet.  There were three persons in it; an
+oarsman in the middle, whilst a man and woman sat at the stern.  I shall
+never forget the thrill of horror which went through me at this sudden
+apparition.  What!--a boat--a small boat--passing beneath that arch into
+yonder roaring gulf!  Yes, yes, down through that awful water-way, with
+more than the swiftness of an arrow, shot the boat, or skiff, right into
+the jaws of the pool.  A monstrous breaker curls over the prow--there is
+no hope; the boat is swamped, and all drowned in that strangling vortex.
+No! the boat, which appeared to have the buoyancy of a feather, skipped
+over the threatening horror, and, the next moment, was out of danger, the
+boatman--a true boatman of Cockaigne that--elevating one of his sculls in
+sign of triumph, the man hallooing, and the woman, a true Englishwoman
+that--of a certain class--waving her shawl.  Whether any one observed
+them save myself, or whether the feat was a common one, I know not; but
+nobody appeared to take any notice of them.  As for myself, I was so
+excited that I strove to clamber up the balustrade of the bridge, in
+order to obtain a better view of the daring adventurers.  Before I could
+accomplish my design, however, I felt myself seized by the body, and,
+turning my head, perceived the old fruit-woman, who was clinging to me.
+
+{picture:Beside a fruit-stall sat an old woman, with a pan of charcoal at
+her feet, and a book in her hand: page203.jpg}
+
+'Nay, dear! don't--don't!' said she.  'Don't fling yourself over--perhaps
+you may have better luck next time!'
+
+'I was not going to fling myself over,' said I, dropping from the
+balustrade; 'how came you to think of such a thing?'
+
+'Why, seeing you clamber up so fiercely, I thought you might have had ill
+luck, and that you wished to make away with yourself.'
+
+'Ill luck,' said I, going into the stone bower, and sitting down.  'What
+do you mean? ill luck in what?'
+
+'Why, no great harm, dear! cly-faking perhaps.'
+
+'Are you coming over me with dialects,' said I, 'speaking unto me in
+fashions I wot nothing of?'
+
+'Nay, dear! don't look so strange with those eyes of your'n, nor talk so
+strangely; I don't understand you.'
+
+'Nor I you; what do you mean by cly-faking?'
+
+'Lor, dear! no harm; only taking a handkerchief now and then.'
+
+'Do you take me for a thief?
+
+'Nay, dear! don't make use of bad language; we never calls them thieves
+here, but prigs and fakers: to tell you the truth, dear, seeing you
+spring at that railing put me in mind of my own dear son, who is now at
+Bot'ny: when he had bad luck, he always used to talk of flinging himself
+over the bridge; and, sure enough, when the traps were after him, he did
+fling himself into the river, but that was off the bank; nevertheless,
+the traps pulled him out, and he is now suffering his sentence; so you
+see you may speak out, if you have done anything in the harmless line,
+for I am my son's own mother, I assure you.'
+
+'So you think there's no harm in stealing?'
+
+'No harm in the world, dear!  Do you think my own child would have been
+transported for it, if there had been any harm in it? and, what's more,
+would the blessed woman in the book here have written her life as she has
+done, and given it to the world, if there had been any harm in faking?
+She, too, was what they call a thief and a cut-purse; ay, and was
+transported for it, like my dear son; and do you think she would have
+told the world so, if there had been any harm in the thing?  Oh, it is a
+comfort to me that the blessed woman was transported, and came back--for
+come back she did, and rich too--for it is an assurance to me that my
+dear son, who was transported too, will come back like her.'
+
+'What was her name?'
+
+'Her name, blessed Mary Flanders.'
+
+'Will you let me look at the book?'
+
+'Yes, dear, that I will, if you promise me not to run away with it.'
+
+I took the book from her hand; a short thick volume, at least a century
+old, bound with greasy black leather.  I turned the yellow and
+dog's-eared pages, reading here and there a sentence.  Yes, and no
+mistake!  _His_ pen, his style, his spirit might be observed in every
+line of the uncouth-looking old volume--the air, the style, the spirit of
+the writer of the book which first taught me to read.  I covered my face
+with my hand, and thought of my childhood. . . .
+
+'This is a singular book,' said I at last; 'but it does not appear to
+have been written to prove that thieving is no harm, but rather to show
+the terrible consequences of crime: it contains a deep moral.'
+
+'A deep what, dear?'
+
+'A--but no matter, I will give you a crown for this volume.'
+
+'No, dear, I will not sell the volume for a crown.'
+
+'I am poor,' said I; 'but I will give you two silver crowns for your
+volume.'
+
+'No, dear, I will not sell my volume for two silver crowns; no, nor for
+the golden one in the king's tower down there; without my book I should
+mope and pine, and perhaps fling myself into the river; but I am glad you
+like it, which shows that I was right about you, after all; you are one
+of our party, and you have a flash about that eye of yours which puts me
+just in mind of my dear son.  No, dear, I won't sell you my book; but, if
+you like, you may have a peep into it whenever you come this way.  I
+shall be glad to see you; you are one of the right sort, for, if you had
+been a common one, you would have run away with the thing; but you scorn
+such behaviour, and, as you are so flash of your money, though you say
+you are poor, you may give me a tanner to buy a little baccy with; I love
+baccy, dear, more by token that it comes from the plantations to which
+the blessed woman was sent.'
+
+'What's a tanner?' said I.
+
+'Lor! don't you know, dear?  Why, a tanner is sixpence; and, as you were
+talking just now about crowns, it will be as well to tell you that those
+of our trade never calls them crowns, but bulls; but I am talking
+nonsense, just as if you did not know all that already, as well as
+myself; you are only shamming--I'm no trap, dear, nor more was the
+blessed woman in the book.  Thank you, dear--thank you for the tanner; if
+I don't spend it, I'll keep it in remembrance of your sweet face.  What,
+you are going?--well, first let me whisper a word to you.  If you have
+any clies to sell at any time, I'll buy them of you; all safe with me; I
+never peach, and scorns a trap; so now, dear, God bless you! and give you
+good luck.  Thank you for your pleasant company, and thank you for the
+tanner.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXII
+
+
+The tanner--The hotel--Drinking claret--London journal--New
+field--Commonplaceness--The three individuals--Botheration--Frank and
+ardent.
+
+'Tanner!' said I musingly, as I left the bridge; 'Tanner! what can the
+man who cures raw skins by means of a preparation of oak bark and other
+materials have to do with the name which these fakers, as they call
+themselves, bestow on the smallest silver coin in these dominions?
+Tanner!  I can't trace the connection between the man of bark and the
+silver coin, unless journeymen tanners are in the habit of working for
+sixpence a day.  But I have it,' I continued, flourishing my hat over my
+head, 'tanner, in this instance, is not an English word.'  Is it not
+surprising that the language of Mr. Petulengro and of Tawno Chikno is
+continually coming to my assistance whenever I appear to be at a nonplus
+with respect to the derivation of crabbed words?  I have made out crabbed
+words in AEschylus by means of the speech of Chikno and Petulengro, and
+even in my Biblical researches I have derived no slight assistance from
+it.  It appears to be a kind of picklock, an open sesame, Tanner--Tawno!
+the one is but a modification of the other; they were originally
+identical, and have still much the same signification.  Tanner, in the
+language of the apple-woman, meaneth the smallest of English silver
+coins; and Tawno, in the language of the Petulengres, though bestowed
+upon the biggest of the Romans, according to strict interpretation
+signifieth a little child.
+
+So I left the bridge, retracing my steps for a considerable way, as I
+thought I had seen enough in the direction in which I had hitherto been
+wandering; I should say that I scarcely walked less than thirty miles
+about the big city on the day of my first arrival.  Night came on, but
+still I was walking about, my eyes wide open, and admiring everything
+that presented itself to them.  Everything was new to me, for everything
+is different in London from what it is elsewhere--the people, their
+language, the horses, the _tout ensemble_--even the stones of London are
+different from others--at least it appeared to me that I had never walked
+with the same ease and facility on the flagstones of a country town as on
+those of London; so I continued roving about till night came on, and then
+the splendour of some of the shops particularly struck me.  'A regular
+Arabian Nights entertainment!' said I, as I looked into one on Cornhill,
+gorgeous with precious merchandise, and lighted up with lustres, the rays
+of which were reflected from a hundred mirrors.
+
+But, notwithstanding the excellence of the London pavement, I began about
+nine o'clock to feel myself thoroughly tired; painfully and slowly did I
+drag my feet along.  I also felt very much in want of some refreshment,
+and I remembered that since breakfast I had taken nothing.  I was now in
+the Strand, and, glancing about, I perceived that I was close by an
+hotel, which bore over the door the somewhat remarkable name of Holy
+Lands.  Without a moment's hesitation I entered a well-lighted passage,
+and, turning to the left, I found myself in a well-lighted coffee-room,
+with a well-dressed and frizzled waiter before me, 'Bring me some
+claret,' said I, for I was rather faint than hungry, and I felt ashamed
+to give a humbler order to so well-dressed an individual.  The waiter
+looked at me for a moment; then, making a low bow, he bustled off, and I
+sat myself down in the box nearest to the window.  Presently the waiter
+returned, bearing beneath his left arm a long bottle, and between the
+fingers of his right hand two large purple glasses; placing the latter on
+the table, he produced a corkscrew, drew the cork in a twinkling, set the
+bottle down before me with a bang, and then, standing still, appeared to
+watch my movements.  You think I don't know how to drink a glass of
+claret, thought I to myself.  I'll soon show you how we drink claret
+where I come from; and, filling one of the glasses to the brim, I
+flickered it for a moment between my eyes and the lustre, and then held
+it to my nose; having given that organ full time to test the bouquet of
+the wine, I applied the glass to my lips, taking a large mouthful of the
+wine, which I swallowed slowly and by degrees, that the palate might
+likewise have an opportunity of performing its functions.  A second
+mouthful I disposed of more summarily; then, placing the empty glass upon
+the table, I fixed my eyes upon the bottle, and said--nothing; whereupon
+the waiter, who had been observing the whole process with considerable
+attention, made me a bow yet more low than before, and, turning on his
+heel, retired with a smart chuck of his head, as much as to say, It is
+all right: the young man is used to claret.
+
+{picture:The young man is used to claret: page209.jpg}
+
+And when the waiter had retired I took a second glass of the wine, which
+I found excellent; and, observing a newspaper lying near me, I took it up
+and began perusing it.  It has been observed somewhere that people who
+are in the habit of reading newspapers every day are not unfrequently
+struck with the excellence of style and general talent which they
+display.  Now, if that be the case, how must I have been surprised, who
+was reading a newspaper for the first time, and that one of the best of
+the London journals!  Yes, strange as it may seem, it was nevertheless
+true that, up to the moment of which I am speaking, I had never read a
+newspaper of any description.  I of course had frequently seen journals,
+and even handled them; but, as for reading them, what were they to me?  I
+cared not for news.  But here I was now with my claret before me,
+perusing, perhaps, the best of all the London journals; it was not the ---
+, and I was astonished: an entirely new field of literature appeared to
+be opened to my view.  It was a discovery, but I confess rather an
+unpleasant one; for I said to myself, If literary talent is so very
+common in London, that the journals, things which, as their very name
+denotes, are ephemeral, are written in a style like the article I have
+been perusing, how can I hope to distinguish myself in this big town,
+when, for the life of me, I don't think I could write anything half so
+clever as what I have been reading?  And then I laid down the paper, and
+fell into deep musing; rousing myself from which, I took a glass of wine,
+and, pouring out another, began musing again.  What I have been reading,
+thought I, is certainly very clever and very talented; but talent and
+cleverness I think I have heard some one say are very commonplace things,
+only fitted for everyday occasions.  I question whether the man who wrote
+the book I saw this day on the bridge was a clever man; but, after all,
+was he not something much better? I don't think he could have written
+this article, but then he wrote the book which I saw on the bridge.  Then,
+if he could not have written the article on which I now hold my
+forefinger--and I do not believe he could--why should I feel discouraged
+at the consciousness that I, too, could not write it?  I certainly could
+no more have written the article than he could; but then, like him,
+though I would not compare myself to the man who wrote the book I saw
+upon the bridge, I think I could--and here I emptied the glass of
+claret--write something better.
+
+Thereupon I resumed the newspaper; and, as I was before struck with the
+fluency of style and the general talent which it displayed, I was now
+equally so with its commonplaceness and want of originality on every
+subject; and it was evident to me that, whatever advantage these
+newspaper-writers might have over me in some points, they had never
+studied the Welsh bards, translated Kaempe Viser, or been under the
+pupilage of Mr. Petulengro and Tawno Chikno.
+
+And as I sat conning the newspaper three individuals entered the room,
+and seated themselves in the box at the farther end of which I was.  They
+were all three very well dressed; two of them elderly gentlemen, the
+third a young man about my own age, or perhaps a year or two older: they
+called for coffee; and, after two or three observations, the two eldest
+commenced a conversation in French, which, however, though they spoke it
+fluently enough, I perceived at once was not their native language; the
+young man, however, took no part in their conversation, and when they
+addressed a portion to him, which indeed was but rarely, merely replied
+by a monosyllable.  I have never been a listener, and I paid but little
+heed to their discourse, nor indeed to themselves; as I occasionally
+looked up, however, I could perceive that the features of the young man,
+who chanced to be seated exactly opposite to me, wore an air of
+constraint and vexation.  This circumstance caused me to observe him more
+particularly than I otherwise should have done: his features were
+handsome and prepossessing; he had dark brown hair and a high-arched
+forehead.  After the lapse of half an hour, the two elder individuals,
+having finished their coffee, called for the waiter, and then rose as if
+to depart, the young man, however, still remaining seated in the box.  The
+others, having reached the door, turned round, and, finding that the
+youth did not follow them, one of them called to him with a tone of some
+authority; whereupon the young man rose, and, pronouncing half audibly
+the word 'botheration,' rose and followed them.  I now observed that he
+was remarkably tall.  All three left the house.  In about ten minutes,
+finding nothing more worth reading in the newspaper, I laid it down, and
+though the claret was not yet exhausted, I was thinking of betaking
+myself to my lodgings, and was about to call the waiter, when I heard a
+step in the passage, and in another moment the tall young man entered the
+room, advanced to the same box, and, sitting down nearly opposite to me,
+again pronounced to himself, but more audibly than before, the same word.
+
+'A troublesome world this, sir,' said I, looking at him.
+
+'Yes,' said the young man, looking fixedly at me; 'but I am afraid we
+bring most of our troubles on our own heads--at least I can say so of
+myself,' he added, laughing.  Then, after a pause, 'I beg pardon,' he
+said, 'but am I not addressing one of my own country?'
+
+'Of what country are you?' said I.
+
+'Ireland.'
+
+'I am not of your country, sir; but I have an infinite veneration for
+your country, as Strap said to the French soldier.  Will you take a glass
+of wine?'
+
+'Ah, de tout mon coeur, as the parasite said to Gil Blas,' cried the
+young man, laughing.  'Here's to our better acquaintance!'
+
+And better acquainted we soon became; and I found that, in making the
+acquaintance of the young man, I had indeed made a valuable acquisition;
+he was accomplished, highly connected, and bore the name of Francis
+Ardry.  Frank and ardent he was, and in a very little time had told me
+much that related to himself, and in return I communicated a general
+outline of my own history; he listened with profound attention, but
+laughed heartily when I told him some particulars of my visit in the
+morning to the publisher, whom he had frequently heard of.
+
+We left the house together.
+
+'We shall soon see each other again,' said he, as we separated at the
+door of my lodging.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIII
+
+
+Dine with the publisher--Religions--No animal food--Unprofitable
+discussions--Principles of criticism--The book market--Newgate
+lives--Goethe a drug--German acquirements--Moral dignity.
+
+On the Sunday I was punctual to my appointment to dine with the
+publisher.  As I hurried along the square in which his house stood, my
+thoughts were fixed so intently on the great man, that I passed by him
+without seeing him.  He had observed me, however, and joined me just as I
+was about to knock at the door.  'Let us take a turn in the square,' said
+he, 'we shall not dine for half an hour.'
+
+'Well,' said he, as we were walking in the square, 'what have you been
+doing since I last saw you?'
+
+'I have been looking about London,' said I, 'and I have bought the
+_Dairyman's Daughter_; here it is.'
+
+'Pray put it up,' said the publisher; 'I don't want to look at such
+trash.  Well, do you think you could write anything like it?'
+
+'I do not,' said I.
+
+'How is that?' said the publisher, looking at me.
+
+'Because,' said I, 'the man who wrote it seems to be perfectly well
+acquainted with his subject; and, moreover, to write from the heart.'
+
+'By the subject you mean--'
+
+'Religion.'
+
+'And ain't you acquainted with religion?'
+
+'Very little.'
+
+'I am sorry for that,' said the publisher seriously, 'for he who sets up
+for an author ought to be acquainted not only with religion, but
+religions, and indeed with all subjects, like my good friend in the
+country.  It is well that I have changed my mind about the _Dairyman's
+Daughter_, or I really don't know whom I could apply to on the subject at
+the present moment, unless to himself; and after all I question whether
+his style is exactly suited for an evangelical novel.'
+
+'Then you do not wish for an imitation of the _Dairyman's Daughter_?'
+
+'I do not, sir; I have changed my mind, as I told you before; I wish to
+employ you in another line, but will communicate to you my intentions
+after dinner.'
+
+At dinner, beside the publisher and myself, were present his wife and son
+with his newly-married bride; the wife appeared a quiet respectable
+woman, and the young people looked very happy and good-natured; not so
+the publisher, who occasionally eyed both with contempt and dislike.
+Connected with this dinner there was one thing remarkable; the publisher
+took no animal food, but contented himself with feeding voraciously on
+rice and vegetables prepared in various ways.
+
+'You eat no animal food, sir?' said I.
+
+'I do not, sir,' said he; 'I have forsworn it upwards of twenty years.  In
+one respect, sir, I am a Brahmin.  I abhor taking away life--the brutes
+have as much right to live as ourselves.'
+
+'But,' said I, 'if the brutes were not killed, there would be such a
+superabundance of them, that the land would be overrun with them.'
+
+'I do not think so, sir; few are killed in India, and yet there is plenty
+of room.'
+
+'But,' said I, 'Nature intended that they should be destroyed, and the
+brutes themselves prey upon one another, and it is well for themselves
+and the world that they do so.  What would be the state of things if
+every insect, bird, and worm were left to perish of old age?'
+
+'We will change the subject,' said the publisher; 'I have never been a
+friend of unprofitable discussions.'
+
+I looked at the publisher with some surprise, I had not been accustomed
+to be spoken to so magisterially; his countenance was dressed in a
+portentous frown, and his eye looked more sinister than ever; at that
+moment he put me in mind of some of those despots of whom I had read in
+the history of Morocco, whose word was law.  He merely wants power,
+thought I to myself, to be a regular Muley Mehemet; and then I sighed,
+for I remembered how very much I was in the power of that man.
+
+The dinner over, the publisher nodded to his wife, who departed, followed
+by her daughter-in-law.  The son looked as if he would willingly have
+attended them; he, however, remained seated; and, a small decanter of
+wine being placed on the table, the publisher filled two glasses, one of
+which he handed to myself, and the other to his son; saying, 'Suppose you
+two drink to the success of the Review.  I would join you,' said he,
+addressing himself to me, 'but I drink no wine; if I am a Brahmin with
+respect to meat, I am a Mahometan with respect to wine.'
+
+So the son and I drank success to the Review, and then the young man
+asked me various questions; for example--How I liked London?--Whether I
+did not think it a very fine place?--Whether I was at the play the night
+before?--and whether I was in the park that afternoon?  He seemed
+preparing to ask me some more questions; but, receiving a furious look
+from his father, he became silent, filled himself a glass of wine, drank
+it off, looked at the table for about a minute, then got up, pushed back
+his chair, made me a bow, and left the room.
+
+'Is that young gentleman, sir,' said I, 'well versed in the principles of
+criticism?'
+
+'He is not, sir,' said the publisher; 'and, if I place him at the head of
+the Review ostensibly, I do it merely in the hope of procuring him a
+maintenance; of the principle of a thing he knows nothing, except that
+the principle of bread is wheat, and that the principle of that wine is
+grape.  Will you take another glass?'
+
+I looked at the decanter; but, not feeling altogether so sure as the
+publisher's son with respect to the principle of what it contained, I
+declined taking any more.
+
+'No, sir,' said the publisher, adjusting himself in his chair, 'he knows
+nothing about criticism, and will have nothing more to do with the
+reviewals than carrying about the books to those who have to review them;
+the real conductor of the Review will be a widely different person, to
+whom I will, when convenient, introduce you.  And now we will talk of the
+matter which we touched upon before dinner: I told you then that I had
+changed my mind with respect to you; I have been considering the state of
+the market, sir, the book market, and I have come to the conclusion that,
+though you might be profitably employed upon evangelical novels, you
+could earn more money for me, sir, and consequently for yourself, by a
+compilation of Newgate lives and trials.'
+
+'Newgate lives and trials!'
+
+'Yes, sir,' said the publisher, 'Newgate lives and trials; and now, sir,
+I will briefly state to you the services which I expect you to perform,
+and the terms which I am willing to grant.  I expect you, sir, to compile
+six volumes of Newgate lives and trials, each volume to contain by no
+manner of means less than one thousand pages; the remuneration which you
+will receive when the work is completed will be fifty pounds, which is
+likewise intended to cover any expenses you may incur in procuring books,
+papers, and manuscripts necessary for the compilation.  Such will be one
+of your employments, sir,--such the terms.  In the second place, you will
+be expected to make yourself useful in the Review--generally useful,
+sir--doing whatever is required of you; for it is not customary, at least
+with me, to permit writers, especially young writers, to choose their
+subjects.  In these two departments, sir, namely compilation and
+reviewing, I had yesterday, after due consideration, determined upon
+employing you.  I had intended to employ you no farther, sir--at least
+for the present; but, sir, this morning I received a letter from my
+valued friend in the country, in which he speaks in terms of strong
+admiration (I don't overstate) of your German acquirements.  Sir, he says
+that it would be a thousand pities if your knowledge of the German
+language should be lost to the world, or even permitted to sleep, and he
+entreats me to think of some plan by which it may be turned to account.
+Sir, I am at all times willing, if possible, to oblige my worthy friend,
+and likewise to encourage merit and talent; I have, therefore, determined
+to employ you in German.'
+
+'Sir,' said I, rubbing my hands, 'you are very kind, and so is our mutual
+friend; I shall be happy to make myself useful in German; and if you
+think a good translation from Goethe--his _Sorrows_ for example, or more
+particularly his _Faust_--'
+
+'Sir,' said the publisher, 'Goethe is a drug; his _Sorrows_ are a drug,
+so is his _Faustus_, more especially the last, since that fool--rendered
+him into English.  No, sir, I do not want you to translate Goethe or
+anything belonging to him; nor do I want you to translate anything from
+the German; what I want you to do, is to translate into German.  I am
+willing to encourage merit, sir; and, as my good friend in his last
+letter has spoken very highly of your German acquirements, I have
+determined that you shall translate my book of philosophy into German.'
+
+'Your book of philosophy into German, sir?'
+
+'Yes, sir; my book of philosophy into German.  I am not a drug, sir, in
+Germany as Goethe is here, no more is my book.  I intend to print the
+translation at Leipzig, sir; and if it turns out a profitable
+speculation, as I make no doubt it will, provided the translation be well
+executed, I will make you some remuneration.  Sir, your remuneration will
+be determined by the success of your translation.'
+
+'But, sir--'
+
+'Sir,' said the publisher, interrupting me, 'you have heard my
+intentions; I consider that you ought to feel yourself highly gratified
+by my intentions towards you; it is not frequently that I deal with a
+writer, especially a young writer, as I have done with you.  And now,
+sir, permit me to inform you that I wish to be alone.  This is Sunday
+afternoon, sir; I never go to church, but I am in the habit of spending
+part of every Sunday afternoon alone--profitably I hope, sir--in musing
+on the magnificence of nature and the moral dignity of man.'
+
+{picture:'I am in the habit of spending part of every Sunday afternoon
+alone, in musing on the magnificence of nature and the moral dignity of
+man.': page217.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIV
+
+
+The two volumes--A young author--Intended editor--Quintilian--Loose
+money.
+
+'What can't be cured must be endured,' and 'it is hard to kick against
+the pricks.'
+
+At the period to which I have brought my history, I bethought me of the
+proverbs with which I have headed this chapter, and determined to act up
+to their spirit.  I determined not to fly in the face of the publisher,
+and to bear--what I could not cure--his arrogance and vanity.  At
+present, at the conclusion of nearly a quarter of a century, I am glad
+that I came to that determination, which I did my best to carry into
+effect.
+
+Two or three days after our last interview, the publisher made his
+appearance in my apartment; he bore two tattered volumes under his arm,
+which he placed on the table.  'I have brought you two volumes of lives,
+sir,' said he, 'which I yesterday found in my garret; you will find them
+of service for your compilation.  As I always wish to behave liberally
+and encourage talent, especially youthful talent, I shall make no charge
+for them, though I should be justified in so doing, as you are aware
+that, by our agreement, you are to provide any books and materials which
+may be necessary.  Have you been in quest of any?'
+
+'No,' said I, 'not yet.'
+
+'Then, sir, I would advise you to lose no time in doing so; you must
+visit all the bookstalls, sir, especially those in the by-streets and
+blind alleys.  It is in such places that you will find the description of
+literature you are in want of.  You must be up and doing, sir; it will
+not do for an author, especially a young author, to be idle in this town.
+To-night you will receive my book of philosophy, and likewise books for
+the Review.  And, by the bye, sir, it will be as well for you to review
+my book of philosophy for the Review; the other reviews not having
+noticed it.  Sir, before translating it, I wish you to review my book of
+philosophy for the Review.'
+
+'I shall be happy to do my best, sir.'
+
+'Very good, sir; I should be unreasonable to expect anything beyond a
+person's best.  And now, sir, if you please, I will conduct you to the
+future editor of the Review.  As you are to co-operate, sir, I deem it
+right to make you acquainted.'
+
+The intended editor was a little old man, who sat in a kind of wooden
+pavilion in a small garden behind a house in one of the purlieus of the
+city, composing tunes upon a piano.  The walls of the pavilion were
+covered with fiddles of various sizes and appearances, and a considerable
+portion of the floor occupied by a pile of books all of one size.  The
+publisher introduced him to me as a gentleman scarcely less eminent in
+literature than in music, and me to him as an aspirant critic--a young
+gentleman scarcely less eminent in philosophy than in philology.  The
+conversation consisted entirely of compliments till just before we
+separated, when the future editor inquired of me whether I had ever read
+Quintilian; and, on my replying in the negative, expressed his surprise
+that any gentleman should aspire to become a critic who had never read
+Quintilian, with the comfortable information, however, that he could
+supply me with a Quintilian at half-price, that is, a translation made by
+himself some years previously, of which he had, pointing to the heap on
+the floor, still a few copies remaining unsold.  For some reason or
+other, perhaps a poor one, I did not purchase the editor's translation of
+Quintilian.
+
+'Sir,' said the publisher, as we were returning from our visit to the
+editor, 'you did right in not purchasing a drug.  I am not prepared, sir,
+to say that Quintilian is a drug, never having seen him; but I am
+prepared to say that man's translation is a drug, judging from the heap
+of rubbish on the floor; besides, sir, you will want any loose money you
+may have to purchase the description of literature which is required for
+your compilation.'
+
+The publisher presently paused before the entrance of a very
+forlorn-looking street.  'Sir,' said he, after looking down it with
+attention, 'I should not wonder if in that street you find works
+connected with the description of literature which is required for your
+compilation.  It is in streets of this description, sir, and blind
+alleys, where such works are to be found.  You had better search that
+street, sir, whilst I continue my way.'
+
+I searched the street to which the publisher had pointed, and, in the
+course of the three succeeding days, many others of a similar kind.  I
+did not find the description of literature alluded to by the publisher to
+be a drug, but, on the contrary, both scarce and dear.  I had expended
+much more than my loose money long before I could procure materials even
+for the first volume of my compilation.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXV
+
+
+Francis Ardry--Certain sharpers--Brave and eloquent--Opposites--Flinging
+the bones--Strange places--Dog-fighting--Learning and letters--Batch of
+dogs--Redoubled application.
+
+One evening I was visited by the tall young gentleman, Francis Ardry,
+whose acquaintance I had formed at the coffee-house.  As it is necessary
+that the reader should know something more about this young man, who will
+frequently appear in the course of these pages, I will state in a few
+words who and what he was.  He was born of an ancient Roman Catholic
+family in Ireland; his parents, whose only child he was, had long been
+dead.  His father, who had survived his mother several years, had been a
+spendthrift, and at his death had left the family property considerably
+embarrassed.  Happily, however, the son and the estate fell into the
+hands of careful guardians, near relations of the family, by whom the
+property was managed to the best advantage, and every means taken to
+educate the young man in a manner suitable to his expectations.  At the
+age of sixteen he was taken from a celebrated school in England at which
+he had been placed, and sent to a small French university, in order that
+he might form an intimate and accurate acquaintance with the grand
+language of the continent.  There he continued three years, at the end of
+which he went under the care of a French abbe to Germany and Italy.  It
+was in this latter country that he first began to cause his guardians
+serious uneasiness.  He was in the heyday of youth when he visited Italy,
+and he entered wildly into the various delights of that fascinating
+region, and, what was worse, falling into the hands of certain sharpers,
+not Italian, but English, he was fleeced of considerable sums of money.
+The abbe, who, it seems, was an excellent individual of the old French
+school, remonstrated with his pupil on his dissipation and extravagance;
+but, finding his remonstrances vain, very properly informed the guardians
+of the manner of life of his charge.  They were not slow in commanding
+Francis Ardry home; and, as he was entirely in their power, he was forced
+to comply.  He had been about three months in London when I met him in
+the coffee-room, and the two elderly gentlemen in his company were his
+guardians.  At this time they were very solicitous that he should choose
+for himself a profession, offering to his choice either the army or
+law--he was calculated to shine in either of these professions--for, like
+many others of his countrymen, he was brave and eloquent; but he did not
+wish to shackle himself with a profession.  As, however, his minority did
+not terminate till he was three-and-twenty, of which age he wanted nearly
+two years, during which he would be entirely dependent on his guardians,
+he deemed it expedient to conceal, to a certain degree, his sentiments,
+temporising with the old gentlemen, with whom, notwithstanding his many
+irregularities, he was a great favourite, and at whose death he expected
+to come into a yet greater property than that which he inherited from his
+parents.
+
+Such is a brief account of Francis Ardry--of my friend Francis Ardry; for
+the acquaintance, commenced in the singular manner with which the reader
+is acquainted, speedily ripened into a friendship which endured through
+many long years of separation, and which still endures certainly on my
+part, and on his--if he lives; but it is many years since I have heard
+from Francis Ardry.
+
+And yet many people would have thought it impossible for our friendship
+to have lasted a week--for in many respects no two people could be more
+dissimilar.  He was an Irishman--I, an Englishman;--he, fiery,
+enthusiastic, and open-hearted; I, neither fiery, enthusiastic, nor open-
+hearted;--he, fond of pleasure and dissipation; I, of study and
+reflection.  Yet it is of such dissimilar elements that the most lasting
+friendships are formed: we do not like counterparts of ourselves.  'Two
+great talkers will not travel far together,' is a Spanish saying; I will
+add, 'Nor two silent people'; we naturally love our opposites.
+
+So Francis Ardry came to see me, and right glad I was to see him, for I
+had just flung my books and papers aside, and was wishing for a little
+social converse; and when we had conversed for some little time together,
+Francis Ardry proposed that we should go to the play to see Kean; so we
+went to the play, and saw--not Kean, who at that time was ashamed to show
+himself, but--a man who was not ashamed to show himself, and who people
+said was a much better man than Kean--as I have no doubt he was--though
+whether he was a better actor I cannot say, for I never saw Kean.
+
+Two or three evenings after Francis Ardry came to see me again, and again
+we went out together, and Francis Ardry took me to--shall I say?--why
+not?--a gaming-house, where I saw people playing, and where I saw Francis
+Ardry play and lose five guineas, and where I lost nothing, because I did
+not play, though I felt somewhat inclined; for a man with a white hat and
+a sparkling eye held up a box which contained something which rattled,
+and asked me to fling the bones.  'There is nothing like flinging the
+bones!' said he, and then I thought I should like to know what kind of
+thing flinging the bones was; I, however, restrained myself.  'There is
+nothing like flinging the bones!' shouted the man, as my friend and
+myself left the room.
+
+Long life and prosperity to Francis Ardry! but for him I should not have
+obtained knowledge which I did of the strange and eccentric places of
+London.  Some of the places to which he took me were very strange places
+indeed; but, however strange the places were, I observed that the
+inhabitants thought there were no places like their several places, and
+no occupations like their several occupations; and among other strange
+places to which Francis Ardry conducted me was a place not far from the
+abbey church of Westminster.
+
+{picture:'There is nothing like flinging the bones!': page223.jpg}
+
+Before we entered this place our ears were greeted by a confused hubbub
+of human voices, squealing of rats, barking of dogs, and the cries of
+various other animals.  Here we beheld a kind of cock-pit, around which a
+great many people, seeming of all ranks, but chiefly of the lower, were
+gathered, and in it we saw a dog destroy a great many rats in a very
+small period; and when the dog had destroyed the rats, we saw a fight
+between a dog and a bear, then a fight between two dogs, then . . . .
+
+After the diversions of the day were over, my friend introduced me to the
+genius of the place, a small man of about five feet high, with a very
+sharp countenance, and dressed in a brown jockey coat and top boots.
+'Joey,' said he, 'this is a friend of mine.'  Joey nodded to me with a
+patronising air.  'Glad to see you, sir!--want a dog?'
+
+'No,' said I.
+
+'You have got one, then--want to match him?'
+
+'We have a dog at home,' said I, 'in the country; but I can't say I
+should like to match him.  Indeed, I do not like dog-fighting.'
+
+'Not like dog-fighting!' said the man, staring.
+
+'The truth is, Joe, that he is just come to town.'
+
+'So I should think; he looks rather green--not like dog-fighting!'
+
+'Nothing like it, is there, Joey?'
+
+'I should think not; what is like it?  A time will come, and that
+speedily, when folks will give up everything else, and follow
+dog-fighting.'
+
+'Do you think so?' said I.
+
+'Think so?  Let me ask what there is that a man wouldn't give up for it?'
+
+'Why,' said I, modestly, 'there's religion.'
+
+'Religion!  How you talk.  Why, there's myself bred and born an
+Independent, and intended to be a preacher, didn't I give up religion for
+dog-fighting?  Religion, indeed!  If it were not for the rascally law, my
+pit would fill better on Sundays than any other time.  Who would go to
+church when they could come to my pit?  Religion! why, the parsons
+themselves come to my pit; and I have now a letter in my pocket from one
+of them, asking me to send him a dog.'
+
+'Well, then, politics,' said I.
+
+'Politics!  Why, the gemmen in the House would leave Pitt himself, if he
+were alive, to come to my pit.  There were three of the best of them here
+to-night, all great horators.--Get on with you, what comes next?'
+
+'Why, there's learning and letters.'
+
+'Pretty things, truly, to keep people from dog-fighting.  Why, there's
+the young gentlemen from the Abbey School comes here in shoals, leaving
+books, and letters, and masters too.  To tell you the truth, I rather
+wish they would mind their letters, for a more precious set of young
+blackguards I never seed.  It was only the other day I was thinking of
+calling in a constable for my own protection, for I thought my pit would
+have been torn down by them.'
+
+Scarcely knowing what to say, I made an observation at random.  'You
+show, by your own conduct,' said I, 'that there are other things worth
+following besides dog-fighting.  You practise rat-catching and badger-
+baiting as well.'
+
+The dog-fancier eyed me with supreme contempt.
+
+'Your friend here,' said he, 'might well call you a new one.  When I
+talks of dog-fighting, I of course means rat-catching, and
+badger-baiting, ay, and bull-baiting too, just as when I speaks
+religiously, when I says one I means not one but three.  And talking of
+religion puts me in mind that I have something else to do besides
+chaffing here, having a batch of dogs to send off by this night's packet
+to the Pope of Rome.'
+
+But at last I had seen enough of what London had to show, whether strange
+or commonplace, so at least I thought, and I ceased to accompany my
+friend in his rambles about town, and to partake of his adventures.  Our
+friendship, however, still continued unabated, though I saw, in
+consequence, less of him.  I reflected that time was passing on--that the
+little money I had brought to town was fast consuming, and that I had
+nothing to depend upon but my own exertions for a fresh supply; and I
+returned with redoubled application to my pursuits.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVI
+
+
+Occupations--Traduttore traditore--Ode to the Mist--Apple and
+pear--Reviewing--Current literature--Oxford-like manner--A plain
+story--Ill-regulated mind--Unsnuffed candle--Strange dreams.
+
+I compiled the Chronicles of Newgate; I reviewed books for the Review
+established on an entirely new principle; and I occasionally tried my
+best to translate into German portions of the publisher's philosophy.  In
+this last task I experienced more than one difficulty.  I was a tolerable
+German scholar, it is true, and I had long been able to translate from
+German into English with considerable facility; but to translate from a
+foreign language into your own is a widely different thing from
+translating from your own into a foreign language; and, in my first
+attempt to render the publisher into German, I was conscious of making
+miserable failures, from pure ignorance of German grammar; however, by
+the assistance of grammars and dictionaries, and by extreme perseverance,
+I at length overcame all the difficulties connected with the German
+language.  But, alas! another difficulty remained, far greater than any
+connected with German--a difficulty connected with the language of the
+publisher--the language which the great man employed in his writings was
+very hard to understand; I say in his writings--for his colloquial
+English was plain enough.  Though not professing to be a scholar, he was
+much addicted, when writing, to the use of Greek and Latin terms, not as
+other people used them, but in a manner of his own, which set the
+authority of dictionaries at defiance; the consequence was that I was
+sometimes utterly at a loss to understand the meaning of the publisher.
+Many a quarter of an hour did I pass at this period, staring at periods
+of the publisher, and wondering what he could mean, but in vain, till at
+last, with a shake of the head, I would snatch up the pen, and render the
+publisher literally into German.  Sometimes I was almost tempted to
+substitute something of my own for what the publisher had written, but my
+conscience interposed; the awful words, Traduttore traditore, commenced
+ringing in my ears, and I asked myself whether I should be acting
+honourably towards the publisher, who had committed to me the delicate
+task of translating him into German; should I be acting honourably
+towards him, in making him speak in German in a manner different from
+that in which he expressed himself in English?  No, I could not reconcile
+such conduct with any principle of honour; by substituting something of
+my own in lieu of these mysterious passages of the publisher, I might be
+giving a fatal blow to his whole system of philosophy.  Besides, when
+translating into English, had I treated foreign authors in this manner?
+Had I treated the minstrels of the Kaempe Viser in this manner?--No.  Had
+I treated Ab Gwilym in this manner?  Even when translating his Ode to the
+Mist, in which he is misty enough, had I attempted to make Ab Gwilym less
+misty?  No; on referring to my translation, I found that Ab Gwilym in my
+hands was quite as misty as in his own.  Then, seeing that I had not
+ventured to take liberties with people who had never put themselves into
+my hands for the purpose of being rendered, how could I venture to
+substitute my own thoughts and ideas for the publisher's, who had put
+himself into my hands for that purpose?  Forbid it every proper
+feeling!--so I told the Germans, in the publisher's own way, the
+publisher's tale of an apple and a pear.
+
+I at first felt much inclined to be of the publisher's opinion with
+respect to the theory of the pear.  After all, why should the earth be
+shaped like an apple, and not like a pear?--it would certainly gain in
+appearance by being shaped like a pear.  A pear being a handsomer fruit
+than an apple, the publisher is probably right, thought I, and I will say
+that he is right on this point in the notice which I am about to write of
+his publication for the Review.  And yet I don't know--said I, after a
+long fit of musing--I don't know but what there is more to be said for
+the Oxford theory.  The world may be shaped like a pear, but I don't know
+that it is; but one thing I know, which is, that it does not taste like a
+pear; I have always liked pears, but I don't like the world.  The world
+to me tastes much more like an apple, and I have never liked apples.  I
+will uphold the Oxford theory--besides, I am writing in an Oxford Review,
+and am in duty bound to uphold the Oxford theory.  So in my notice I
+asserted that the world was round; I quoted Scripture, and endeavoured to
+prove that the world was typified by the apple in Scripture, both as to
+shape and properties.  'An apple is round,' said I, 'and the world is
+round--the apple is a sour, disagreeable fruit; and who has tasted much
+of the world without having his teeth set on edge?'  I, however, treated
+the publisher, upon the whole, in the most urbane and Oxford-like manner;
+complimenting him upon his style, acknowledging the general soundness of
+his views, and only differing with him in the affair of the apple and
+pear.
+
+{picture:I did not like reviewing at all--it was not to my taste:
+page228.jpg}
+
+I did not like reviewing at all--it was not to my taste; it was not in my
+way; I liked it far less than translating the publisher's philosophy, for
+that was something in the line of one whom a competent judge had surnamed
+Lavengro.  I never could understand why reviews were instituted; works of
+merit do not require to be reviewed, they can speak for themselves, and
+require no praising; works of no merit at all will die of themselves,
+they require no killing.  The Review to which I was attached was, as has
+been already intimated, established on an entirely new plan; it professed
+to review all new publications, which certainly no Review had ever
+professed to do before, other Reviews never pretending to review more
+than one-tenth of the current literature of the day.  When I say it
+professed to review all new publications, I should add, which should be
+sent to it; for, of course, the Review would not acknowledge the
+existence of publications, the authors of which did not acknowledge the
+existence of the Review.  I don't think, however, that the Review had
+much cause to complain of being neglected; I have reason to believe that
+at least nine-tenths of the publications of the day were sent to the
+Review, and in due time reviewed.  I had good opportunity of judging--I
+was connected with several departments of the Review, though more
+particularly with the poetical and philosophic ones.  An English
+translation of Kant's philosophy made its appearance on my table the day
+before its publication.  In my notice of this work I said that the
+English shortly hoped to give the Germans a _quid pro quo_.  I believe at
+that time authors were much in the habit of publishing at their own
+expense.  All the poetry which I reviewed appeared to be published at the
+expense of the authors.  If I am asked how I comported myself, under all
+circumstances, as a reviewer--I answer,--I did not forget that I was
+connected with a Review established on Oxford principles, the editor of
+which had translated Quintilian.  All the publications which fell under
+my notice I treated in a gentlemanly and Oxford-like manner, no
+personalities--no vituperation--no shabby insinuations; decorum, decorum
+was the order of the day.  Occasionally a word of admonition, but gently
+expressed, as an Oxford undergraduate might have expressed it, or master
+of arts.  How the authors whose publications were consigned to my
+colleagues were treated by them I know not; I suppose they were treated
+in an urbane and Oxford-like manner, but I cannot say; I did not read the
+reviewals of my colleagues, I did not read my own after they were
+printed.  I did not like reviewing.
+
+Of all my occupations at this period I am free to confess I liked that of
+compiling the _Newgate Lives and Trials_ the best; that is, after I had
+surmounted a kind of prejudice which I originally entertained.  The
+trials were entertaining enough; but the lives--how full were they of
+wild and racy adventures, and in what racy, genuine language were they
+told!  What struck me most with respect to these lives was the art which
+the writers, whoever they were, possessed of telling a plain story.  It
+is no easy thing to tell a story plainly and distinctly by mouth; but to
+tell one on paper is difficult indeed, so many snares lie in the way.
+People are afraid to put down what is common on paper, they seek to
+embellish their narratives, as they think, by philosophic speculations
+and reflections; they are anxious to shine, and people who are anxious to
+shine can never tell a plain story.  'So I went with them to a music
+booth, where they made me almost drunk with gin, and began to talk their
+flash language, which I did not understand,' says, or is made to say,
+Henry Simms, executed at Tyburn some seventy years before the time of
+which I am speaking.  I have always looked upon this sentence as a
+masterpiece of the narrative style, it is so concise and yet so very
+clear.  As I gazed on passages like this, and there were many nearly as
+good in the Newgate lives, I often sighed that it was not my fortune to
+have to render these lives into German rather than the publisher's
+philosophy--his tale of an apple and pear.
+
+Mine was an ill-regulated mind at this period.  As I read over the lives
+of these robbers and pickpockets, strange doubts began to arise in my
+mind about virtue and crime.  Years before, when quite a boy, as in one
+of the early chapters I have hinted, I had been a necessitarian; I had
+even written an essay on crime (I have it now before me, penned in a
+round boyish hand), in which I attempted to prove that there is no such
+thing as crime or virtue, all our actions being the result of
+circumstances or necessity.  These doubts were now again reviving in my
+mind; I could not, for the life of me, imagine how, taking all
+circumstances into consideration, these highwaymen, these pickpockets,
+should have been anything else than highwaymen and pickpockets; any more
+than how, taking all circumstances into consideration, Bishop Latimer
+(the reader is aware that I had read Foxe's _Book of Martyrs_) should
+have been anything else than Bishop Latimer.  I had a very ill-regulated
+mind at that period.
+
+My own peculiar ideas with respect to everything being a lying dream
+began also to revive.  Sometimes at midnight, after having toiled for
+hours at my occupations, I would fling myself back on my chair, look
+about the poor apartment, dimly lighted by an unsnuffed candle, or upon
+the heaps of books and papers before me, and exclaim,--'Do I exist?  Do
+these things, which I think I see about me, exist, or do they not?  Is
+not everything a dream--a deceitful dream?  Is not this apartment a
+dream--the furniture a dream?  The publisher a dream--his philosophy a
+dream?  Am I not myself a dream--dreaming about translating a dream?  I
+can't see why all should not be a dream; what's the use of the reality?'
+And then I would pinch myself, and snuff the burdened smoky light.  'I
+can't see, for the life of me, the use of all this; therefore why should
+I think that it exists?  If there was a chance, a probability, of all
+this tending to anything, I might believe; but--' and then I would stare
+and think, and after some time shake my head and return again to my
+occupations for an hour or two; and then I would perhaps shake, and
+shiver, and yawn, and look wistfully in the direction of my sleeping
+apartment; and then, but not wistfully, at the papers and books before
+me; and sometimes I would return to my papers and books; but oftener I
+would arise, and, after another yawn and shiver, take my light, and
+proceed to my sleeping chamber.
+
+They say that light fare begets light dreams; my fare at that time was
+light enough; but I had anything but light dreams, for at that period I
+had all kind of strange and extravagant dreams, and amongst other things
+I dreamt that the whole world had taken to dog-fighting; and that I,
+myself, had taken to dog-fighting, and that in a vast circus I backed an
+English bulldog against the bloodhound of the Pope of Rome.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVII
+
+
+My brother--Fits of crying--Mayor-elect--The committee--The Norman arch--A
+word of Greek--Church and State--At my own expense--If you please.
+
+One morning I arose somewhat later than usual, having been occupied
+during the greater part of the night with my literary toil.  On
+descending from my chamber into the sitting-room I found a person seated
+by the fire, whose glance was directed sideways to the table, on which
+were the usual preparations for my morning's meal.  Forthwith I gave a
+cry, and sprang forward to embrace the person; for the person by the
+fire, whose glance was directed to the table, was no one else than my
+brother.
+
+'And how are things going on at home?' said I to my brother, after we had
+kissed and embraced.  'How is my mother, and how is the dog?'
+
+'My mother, thank God, is tolerably well,' said my brother, 'but very
+much given to fits of crying.  As for the dog, he is not so well; but we
+will talk more of these matters anon,' said my brother, again glancing at
+the breakfast things: 'I am very hungry, as you may suppose, after having
+travelled all night.'
+
+Thereupon I exerted myself to the best of my ability to perform the
+duties of hospitality, and I made my brother welcome--I may say more than
+welcome; and, when the rage of my brother's hunger was somewhat abated,
+we recommenced talking about the matters of our little family, and my
+brother told me much about my mother; he spoke of her fits of crying, but
+said that of late the said fits of crying had much diminished, and she
+appeared to be taking comfort; and, if I am not much mistaken, my brother
+told me that my mother had of late the Prayer-book frequently in her
+hand, and yet oftener the Bible.
+
+We were silent for a time--at last I opened my mouth and mentioned the
+dog.
+
+'The dog,' said my brother, 'is, I am afraid, in a very poor way; ever
+since the death he has done nothing but pine and take on.  A few months
+ago, you remember, he was as plump and fine as any dog in the town; but
+at present he is little more than skin and bone.  Once we lost him for
+two days, and never expected to see him again, imagining that some
+mischance had befallen him; at length I found him--where do you think?
+Chancing to pass by the churchyard, I found him seated on the grave!'
+
+'Very strange,' said I; 'but let us talk of something else.  It was very
+kind of you to come and see me.'
+
+'Oh, as for that matter, I did not come up to see you, though of course I
+am very glad to see you, having been rather anxious about you, like my
+mother, who has received only one letter from you since your departure.
+No, I did not come up on purpose to see you; but on quite a different
+account.  You must know that the corporation of our town have lately
+elected a new mayor, a person of many qualifications--big and portly,
+with a voice like Boanerges; a religious man, the possessor of an immense
+pew; loyal, so much so that I once heard him say that he would at any
+time go three miles to hear any one sing "God save the King"; moreover, a
+giver of excellent dinners.  Such is our present mayor; who, owing to his
+loyalty, his religion, and a little, perhaps, to his dinners, is a mighty
+favourite; so much so that the town is anxious to have his portrait
+painted in a superior style, so that remote posterity may know what kind
+of man he was, the colour of his hair, his air and gait.  So a committee
+was formed some time ago, which is still sitting; that is, they dine with
+the mayor every day to talk over the subject.  A few days since, to my
+great surprise, they made their appearance in my poor studio, and desired
+to be favoured with a sight of some of my paintings; well, I showed them
+some, and, after looking at them with great attention, they went aside
+and whispered.  "He'll do," I heard one say; "Yes, he'll do," said
+another; and then they came to me, and one of them, a little man with a
+hump on his back, who is a watchmaker, assumed the office of spokesman,
+and made a long speech--(the old town has been always celebrated for
+orators)--in which he told me how much they had been pleased with my
+productions--(the old town has been always celebrated for its artistic
+taste)--and, what do you think? offered me the painting of the mayor's
+portrait, and a hundred pounds for my trouble.  Well, of course I was
+much surprised, and for a minute or two could scarcely speak; recovering
+myself, however, I made a speech, not so eloquent as that of the
+watchmaker of course, being not so accustomed to speaking; but not so bad
+either, taking everything into consideration, telling them how flattered
+I felt by the honour which they had conferred in proposing to me such an
+undertaking; expressing, however, my fears that I was not competent to
+the task, and concluding by saying what a pity it was that Crome was
+dead.  "Crome," said the little man, "Crome; yes, he was a clever man, a
+very clever man in his way; he was good at painting landscapes and farm-
+houses, but he would not do in the present instance were he alive.  He
+had no conception of the heroic, sir.  We want some person capable of
+representing our mayor striding under the Norman arch out of the
+cathedral."  At the mention of the heroic an idea came at once into my
+head.  "Oh," said I, "if you are in quest of the heroic, I am glad that
+you came to me; don't mistake me," I continued, "I do not mean to say
+that I could do justice to your subject, though I am fond of the heroic;
+but I can introduce you to a great master of the heroic, fully competent
+to do justice to your mayor.  Not to me, therefore, be the painting of
+the picture given, but to a friend of mine, the great master of the
+heroic, to the best, the strongest, [Greek text]" I added, for, being
+amongst orators, I thought a word of Greek would tell.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'and what did the orators say?'
+
+'They gazed dubiously at me and at one another,' said my brother; 'at
+last the watchmaker asked me who this Mr. Christo was; adding, that he
+had never heard of such a person; that, from my recommendation of him, he
+had no doubt that he was a very clever man; but that they should like to
+know something more about him before giving the commission to him.  That
+he had heard of Christie the great auctioneer, who was considered to be
+an excellent judge of pictures; but he supposed that I
+scarcely--Whereupon, interrupting the watchmaker, I told him that I
+alluded neither to Christo nor to Christie; but to the painter of Lazarus
+rising from the grave, a painter under whom I had myself studied during
+some months that I had spent in London, and to whom I was indebted for
+much connected with the heroic.
+
+'"I have heard of him," said the watchmaker, "and his paintings too; but
+I am afraid that he is not exactly the gentleman by whom our mayor would
+wish to be painted.  I have heard say that he is not a very good friend
+to Church and State.  Come, young man," he added, "it appears to me that
+you are too modest; I like your style of painting, so do we all, and--why
+should I mince the matter?--the money is to be collected in the town, why
+should it go into a stranger's pocket, and be spent in London?"
+
+'Thereupon I made them a speech, in which I said that art had nothing to
+do with Church and State, at least with English Church and State, which
+had never encouraged it; and that, though Church and State were doubtless
+very fine things, a man might be a very good artist who cared not a straw
+for either.  I then made use of some more Greek words, and told them how
+painting was one of the Nine Muses, and one of the most independent
+creatures alive, inspiring whom she pleased, and asking leave of nobody;
+that I should be quite unworthy of the favours of the Muse if, on the
+present occasion, I did not recommend them a man whom I considered to be
+a much greater master of the heroic than myself; and that, with regard to
+the money being spent in the city, I had no doubt that they would not
+weigh for a moment such a consideration against the chance of getting a
+true heroic picture for the city.  I never talked so well in my life, and
+said so many flattering things to the hunchback and his friends, that at
+last they said that I should have my own way; and that if I pleased to go
+up to London, and bring down the painter of Lazarus to paint the mayor, I
+might; so they then bade me farewell, and I have come up to London.'
+
+'To put a hundred pounds into the hands of--'
+
+'A better man than myself,' said my brother, 'of course.'
+
+'And have you come up at your own expense?'
+
+'Yes,' said my brother, 'I have come up at my own expense.'
+
+I made no answer, but looked in my brother's face.  We then returned to
+the former subjects of conversation, talking of the dead, my mother, and
+the dog.
+
+After some time my brother said, 'I will now go to the painter, and
+communicate to him the business which has brought me to town; and, if you
+please, I will take you with me and introduce you to him.'  Having
+expressed my willingness, we descended into the street.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVIII
+
+
+Painter of the heroic--I'll go!--A modest peep--Who is this?--A capital
+Pharaoh--Disproportionably short--Imaginary picture--English figures.
+
+The painter of the heroic resided a great way off, at the western end of
+the town.  We had some difficulty in obtaining admission to him; a maid-
+servant, who opened the door, eyeing us somewhat suspiciously: it was not
+until my brother had said that he was a friend of the painter that we
+were permitted to pass the threshold.  At length we were shown into the
+studio, where we found the painter, with an easel and brush, standing
+before a huge piece of canvas, on which he had lately commenced painting
+a heroic picture.  The painter might be about thirty-five years old; he
+had a clever, intelligent countenance, with a sharp gray eye--his hair
+was dark brown, and cut a-la-Rafael, as I was subsequently told, that is,
+there was little before and much behind--he did not wear a neck-cloth;
+but, in its stead, a black riband, so that his neck, which was rather
+fine, was somewhat exposed--he had a broad, muscular breast, and I make
+no doubt that he would have been a very fine figure, but unfortunately
+his legs and thighs were somewhat short.  He recognised my brother, and
+appeared glad to see him.
+
+'What brings you to London?' said he.
+
+Whereupon my brother gave him a brief account of his commission.  At the
+mention of the hundred pounds, I observed the eyes of the painter
+glisten.  'Really,' said he, when my brother had concluded, 'it was very
+kind to think of me.  I am not very fond of painting portraits; but a
+mayor is a mayor, and there is something grand in that idea of the Norman
+arch.  I'll go; moreover, I am just at this moment confoundedly in need
+of money, and when you knocked at the door, I don't mind telling you, I
+thought it was some dun.  I don't know how it is, but in the capital they
+have no taste for the heroic, they will scarce look at a heroic picture;
+I am glad to hear that they have better taste in the provinces.  I'll go;
+when shall we set off?'
+
+Thereupon it was arranged between the painter and my brother that they
+should depart the next day but one; they then began to talk of art.  'I'll
+stick to the heroic,' said the painter; 'I now and then dabble in the
+comic, but what I do gives me no pleasure, the comic is so low; there is
+nothing like the heroic.  I am engaged here on a heroic picture,' said
+he, pointing to the canvas; 'the subject is "Pharaoh dismissing Moses
+from Egypt," after the last plague--the death of the first-born; it is
+not far advanced--that finished figure is Moses': they both looked at the
+canvas, and I, standing behind, took a modest peep.  The picture, as the
+painter said, was not far advanced, the Pharaoh was merely in outline; my
+eye was, of course, attracted by the finished figure, or rather what the
+painter had called the finished figure; but, as I gazed upon it, it
+appeared to me that there was something defective--something
+unsatisfactory in the figure.  I concluded, however, that the painter,
+notwithstanding what he had said, had omitted to give it the finishing
+touch.  'I intend this to be my best picture,' said the painter; 'what I
+want now is a face for Pharaoh; I have long been meditating on a face for
+Pharaoh.'  Here, chancing to cast his eye upon my countenance, of whom he
+had scarcely taken any manner of notice, he remained with his mouth open
+for some time.  'Who is this?' said he at last.  'Oh, this is my brother,
+I forgot to introduce him.' . . .
+
+We presently afterwards departed; my brother talked much about the
+painter.  'He is a noble fellow,' said my brother; 'but, like many other
+noble fellows, has a great many enemies; he is hated by his brethren of
+the brush--all the land and water scape painters hate him--but, above
+all, the race of portrait-painters, who are ten times more numerous than
+the other two sorts, detest him for his heroic tendencies.  It will be a
+kind of triumph to the last, I fear, when they hear he has condescended
+to paint a portrait; however, that Norman arch will enable him to escape
+from their malice--that is a capital idea of the watchmaker, that Norman
+arch.'
+
+I spent a happy day with my brother.  On the morrow he went again to the
+painter, with whom he dined; I did not go with him.  On his return he
+said, 'The painter has been asking a great many questions about you, and
+expressed a wish that you would sit to him as Pharaoh; he thinks you
+would make a capital Pharaoh.'  'I have no wish to appear on canvas,'
+said I; 'moreover he can find much better Pharaohs than myself; and, if
+he wants a real Pharaoh, there is a certain Mr. Petulengro.'
+'Petulengro?' said my brother; 'a strange kind of fellow came up to me
+some time ago in our town, and asked me about you; when I inquired his
+name, he told me Petulengro.  No, he will not do, he is too short; by the
+bye, do you not think that figure of Moses is somewhat short?'  And then
+it appeared to me that I had thought the figure of Moses somewhat short,
+and I told my brother so.  'Ah!' said my brother.
+
+On the morrow my brother departed with the painter for the old town, and
+there the painter painted the mayor.  I did not see the picture for a
+great many years, when, chancing to be at the old town, I beheld it.
+
+The original mayor was a mighty, portly man, with a bull's head, black
+hair, body like that of a dray horse, and legs and thighs corresponding;
+a man six foot high at the least.  To his bull's head, black hair, and
+body the painter had done justice; there was one point, however, in which
+the portrait did not correspond with the original--the legs were
+disproportionably short, the painter having substituted his own legs for
+those of the mayor, which when I perceived I rejoiced that I had not
+consented to be painted as Pharaoh, for, if I had, the chances are that
+he would have served me in exactly a similar way as he had served Moses
+and the mayor.
+
+Short legs in a heroic picture will never do; and, upon the whole, I
+think the painter's attempt at the heroic in painting the mayor of the
+old town a decided failure.  If I am now asked whether the picture would
+have been a heroic one provided the painter had not substituted his own
+legs for those of the mayor--I must say, I am afraid not.  I have no idea
+of making heroic pictures out of English mayors, even with the assistance
+of Norman arches; yet I am sure that capital pictures might be made out
+of English mayors, not issuing from Norman arches, but rather from the
+door of the 'Checquers' or the 'Brewers Three.'  The painter in question
+had great comic power, which he scarcely ever cultivated; he would fain
+be a Rafael, which he never could be, when he might have been something
+quite as good--another Hogarth; the only comic piece which he ever
+presented to the world being something little inferior to the best of
+that illustrious master.  I have often thought what a capital picture
+might have been made by my brother's friend, if, instead of making the
+mayor issue out of the Norman arch, he had painted him moving under the
+sign of the 'Checquers,' or the 'Three Brewers,' with mace--yes, with
+mace,--the mace appears in the picture issuing out of the Norman arch
+behind the mayor,--but likewise with Snap, and with whiffler, quart pot,
+and frying-pan, Billy Blind and Owlenglass, Mr. Petulengro and
+Pakomovna;--then, had he clapped his own legs upon the mayor, or any one
+else in the concourse, what matter?  But I repeat that I have no hope of
+making heroic pictures out of English mayors, or, indeed, out of English
+figures in general.  England may be a land of heroic hearts, but it is
+not, properly, a land of heroic figures, or heroic posture-making.  Italy
+. . . what was I going to say about Italy?
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIX
+
+
+No authority whatever--Interference--Wondrous farrago--Brandt and
+Struensee--What a life!--The hearse--Mortal relics--Great poet--Fashion
+and fame--What a difference--Oh, beautiful--Good for nothing.
+
+And now once more to my pursuits, to my Lives and Trials.  However
+partial at first I might be to these lives and trials, it was not long
+before they became regular trials to me, owing to the whims and caprices
+of the publisher.  I had not been long connected with him before I
+discovered that he was wonderfully fond of interfering with other
+people's business--at least with the business of those who were under his
+control.  What a life did his unfortunate authors lead!  He had many in
+his employ toiling at all kinds of subjects--I call them authors because
+there is something respectable in the term author, though they had little
+authorship in, and no authority whatever over the works on which they
+were engaged.  It is true the publisher interfered with some colour of
+reason, the plan of all and every of the works alluded to having
+originated with himself; and, be it observed, many of his plans were
+highly clever and promising, for, as I have already had occasion to say,
+the publisher in many points was a highly clever and sagacious person;
+but he ought to have been contented with planning the works originally,
+and have left to other people the task of executing them, instead of
+which he marred everything by his rage for interference.  If a book of
+fairy tales was being compiled, he was sure to introduce some of his
+philosophy, explaining the fairy tale by some theory of his own.  Was a
+book of anecdotes on hand, it was sure to be half filled with sayings and
+doings of himself during the time that he was common councilman of the
+City of London.  Now, however fond the public might be of fairy tales, it
+by no means relished them in conjunction with the publisher's philosophy;
+and however fond of anecdotes in general, or even of the publisher in
+particular--for indeed there were a great many anecdotes in circulation
+about him which the public both read and listened to very readily--it
+took no pleasure in such anecdotes as he was disposed to relate about
+himself.  In the compilation of my Lives and Trials I was exposed to
+incredible mortification, and ceaseless trouble, from this same rage for
+interference.  It is true he could not introduce his philosophy into the
+work, nor was it possible for him to introduce anecdotes of himself,
+having never had the good or evil fortune to be tried at the bar; but he
+was continually introducing--what, under a less apathetic government than
+the one then being, would have infallibly subjected him, and perhaps
+myself, to a trial,--his politics; not his Oxford or pseudo politics, but
+the politics which he really entertained, and which were of the most
+republican and violent kind.  But this was not all; when about a moiety
+of the first volume had been printed, he materially altered the plan of
+the work; it was no longer to be a collection of mere Newgate lives and
+trials, but of lives and trials of criminals in general, foreign as well
+as domestic.  In a little time the work became a wondrous farrago, in
+which Konigsmark the robber figured by the side of Sam Lynn, and the
+Marchioness de Brinvilliers was placed in contact with a Chinese outlaw.
+What gave me the most trouble and annoyance was the publisher's
+remembering some life or trial, foreign or domestic, which he wished to
+be inserted, and which I was forthwith to go in quest of and purchase at
+my own expense: some of those lives and trials were by no means easy to
+find.  'Where is Brandt and Struensee?' cries the publisher; 'I am sure I
+don't know,' I replied; whereupon the publisher falls to squealing like
+one of Joey's rats.  'Find me up Brandt and Struensee by next morning,
+or--'  'Have you found Brandt and Struensee?' cried the publisher, on my
+appearing before him next morning.  'No,' I reply, 'I can hear nothing
+about them'; whereupon the publisher falls to bellowing like Joey's bull.
+By dint of incredible diligence, I at length discover the dingy volume
+containing the lives and trials of the celebrated two who had brooded
+treason dangerous to the state of Denmark.  I purchase the dingy volume,
+and bring it in triumph to the publisher, the perspiration running down
+my brow.  The publisher takes the dingy volume in his hand, he examines
+it attentively, then puts it down; his countenance is calm for a moment,
+almost benign.  Another moment and there is a gleam in the publisher's
+sinister eye; he snatches up the paper containing the names of the
+worthies which I have intended shall figure in the forthcoming volumes--he
+glances rapidly over it, and his countenance once more assumes a terrific
+expression.  'How is this?' he exclaims; 'I can scarcely believe my
+eyes--the most important life and trial omitted to be found in the whole
+criminal record--what gross, what utter negligence!  Where's the life of
+Farmer Patch? where's the trial of Yeoman Patch?'
+
+'What a life! what a dog's life!' I would frequently exclaim, after
+escaping from the presence of the publisher.
+
+One day, after a scene with the publisher similar to that which I have
+described above, I found myself about noon at the bottom of Oxford
+Street, where it forms a right angle with the road which leads or did
+lead to Tottenham Court.  Happening to cast my eyes around, it suddenly
+occurred to me that something uncommon was expected; people were standing
+in groups on the pavement--the upstair windows of the houses were
+thronged with faces, especially those of women, and many of the shops
+were partly, and not a few entirely, closed.  What could be the reason of
+all this?  All at once I bethought me that this street of Oxford was no
+other than the far-famed Tyburn way.  Oh, oh, thought I, an execution;
+some handsome young robber is about to be executed at the farther end;
+just so, see how earnestly the women are peering; perhaps another Harry
+Simms--Gentleman Harry as they called him--is about to be carted along
+this street to Tyburn tree; but then I remembered that Tyburn tree had
+long since been cut down, and that criminals, whether young or old, good-
+looking or ugly, were executed before the big stone gaol, which I had
+looked at with a kind of shudder during my short rambles in the City.
+What could be the matter? just then I heard various voices cry, 'There it
+comes!' and all heads were turned up Oxford Street, down which a hearse
+was slowly coming: nearer and nearer it drew; presently it was just
+opposite the place where I was standing, when, turning to the left, it
+proceeded slowly along Tottenham Road; immediately behind the hearse were
+three or four mourning coaches, full of people, some of whom, from the
+partial glimpse which I caught of them, appeared to be foreigners; behind
+these came a very long train of splendid carriages, all of which, without
+one exception, were empty.
+
+'Whose body is in that hearse?' said I to a dapper-looking individual,
+seemingly a shopkeeper, who stood beside me on the pavement, looking at
+the procession.
+
+'The mortal relics of Lord Byron,' said the dapper-looking individual,
+mouthing his words and smirking--'the illustrious poet, which have been
+just brought from Greece, and are being conveyed to the family vault in
+---shire.'
+
+'An illustrious poet, was he?' said I.
+
+'Beyond all criticism,' said the dapper man; 'all we of the rising
+generation are under incalculable obligation to Byron; I myself, in
+particular, have reason to say so; in all my correspondence my style is
+formed on the Byronic model.'
+
+I looked at the individual for a moment, who smiled and smirked to
+himself applause, and then I turned my eyes upon the hearse proceeding
+slowly up the almost endless street.  This man, this Byron, had for many
+years past been the demigod of England, and his verses the daily food of
+those who read, from the peer to the draper's assistant; all were
+admirers, or rather worshippers, of Byron, and all doated on his verses;
+and then I thought of those who, with genius as high as his, or higher,
+had lived and died neglected.  I thought of Milton abandoned to poverty
+and blindness; of witty and ingenious Butler consigned to the tender
+mercies of bailiffs; and starving Otway: they had lived neglected and
+despised, and, when they died, a few poor mourners only had followed them
+to the grave; but this Byron had been made a half god of when living, and
+now that he was dead he was followed by worshipping crowds, and the very
+sun seemed to come out on purpose to grace his funeral.  And, indeed, the
+sun, which for many days past had hidden its face in clouds, shone out
+that morn with wonderful brilliancy, flaming upon the black hearse and
+its tall ostrich plumes, the mourning coaches, and the long train of
+aristocratic carriages which followed behind.
+
+'Great poet, sir,' said the dapper-looking man, 'great poet, but
+unhappy.'
+
+Unhappy? yes, I had heard that he had been unhappy; that he had roamed
+about a fevered, distempered man, taking pleasure in nothing--that I had
+heard; but was it true? was he really unhappy? was not this unhappiness
+assumed, with the view of increasing the interest which the world took in
+him? and yet who could say?  He might be unhappy, and with reason.  Was
+he a real poet after all? might he not doubt himself? might he not have a
+lurking consciousness that he was undeserving of the homage which he was
+receiving? that it could not last? that he was rather at the top of
+fashion than of fame?  He was a lordling, a glittering, gorgeous
+lordling: and he might have had a consciousness that he owed much of his
+celebrity to being so; he might have felt that he was rather at the top
+of fashion than of fame.  Fashion soon changes, thought I, eagerly to
+myself--a time will come, and that speedily, when he will be no longer in
+the fashion; when this idiotic admirer of his, who is still grinning at
+my side, shall have ceased to mould his style on Byron's; and this
+aristocracy, squirearchy, and what not, who now send their empty
+carriages to pay respect to the fashionable corpse, shall have
+transferred their empty worship to some other animate or inanimate thing.
+Well, perhaps after all it was better to have been mighty Milton in his
+poverty and blindness--witty and ingenious Butler consigned to the tender
+mercies of bailiffs, and starving Otway; they might enjoy more real
+pleasure than this lordling; they must have been aware that the world
+would one day do them justice--fame after death is better than the top of
+fashion in life.  They have left a fame behind them which shall never
+die, whilst this lordling--a time will come when he will be out of
+fashion and forgotten.  And yet I don't know; didn't he write Childe
+Harold and that ode?  Yes, he wrote Childe Harold and that ode.  Then a
+time will scarcely come when he will be forgotten.  Lords, squires, and
+cockneys may pass away, but a time will scarcely come when Childe Harold
+and that ode will be forgotten.  He was a poet, after all, and he must
+have known it; a real poet, equal to--to--what a destiny!  Rank, beauty,
+fashion, immortality,--he could not be unhappy; what a difference in the
+fate of men--I wish I could think he was unhappy . . . .
+
+I turned away.
+
+'Great poet, sir,' said the dapper man, turning away too, 'but
+unhappy--fate of genius, sir; I, too, am frequently unhappy.'
+
+Hurrying down a street to the right, I encountered Francis Ardry.
+
+'What means the multitude yonder?' he demanded.
+
+'They are looking after the hearse which is carrying the remains of Byron
+up Tottenham Road.'
+
+'I have seen the man,' said my friend, as he turned back the way he had
+come, 'so I can dispense with seeing the hearse--I saw the living man at
+Venice--ah, a great poet.'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'a great poet, it must be so, everybody says so--what a
+destiny!  What a difference in the fate of men; but 'tis said he was
+unhappy; you have seen him, how did he look?'
+
+'Oh, beautiful!'
+
+'But did he look happy?'
+
+'Why, I can't say he looked very unhappy; I saw him with two . . . very
+fair ladies; but what is it to you whether the man was unhappy or not?
+Come, where shall we go--to Joey's?  His hugest bear--'
+
+'Oh, I have had enough of bears, I have just been worried by one.'
+
+'The publisher?'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'Then come to Joey's, three dogs are to be launched at his bear: as they
+pin him, imagine him to be the publisher.'
+
+'No,' said I, 'I am good for nothing; I think I shall stroll to London
+Bridge.'
+
+'That's too far for me--farewell.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XL
+
+
+London Bridge--Why not?--Every heart has its bitters--Wicked boys--Give
+me my book--Such a fright--Honour bright.
+
+So I went to London Bridge, and again took my station on the spot by the
+booth where I had stood on the former occasion.  The booth, however, was
+empty; neither the apple-woman nor her stall was to be seen.  I looked
+over the balustrade upon the river; the tide was now, as before, rolling
+beneath the arch with frightful impetuosity.  As I gazed upon the eddies
+of the whirlpool, I thought within myself how soon human life would
+become extinct there; a plunge, a convulsive flounder, and all would be
+over.  When I last stood over that abyss I had felt a kind of impulse--a
+fascination; I had resisted it--I did not plunge into it.  At present I
+felt a kind of impulse to plunge; but the impulse was of a different
+kind; it proceeded from a loathing of life, I looked wistfully at the
+eddies--what had I to live for?--what, indeed!  I thought of Brandt and
+Struensee, and Yeoman Patch--should I yield to the impulse--why not?  My
+eyes were fixed on the eddies.  All of a sudden I shuddered; I thought I
+saw heads in the pool; human bodies wallowing confusedly; eyes turned up
+to heaven with hopeless horror; was that water or--?  Where was the
+impulse now?  I raised my eyes from the pool, I looked no more upon it--I
+looked forward, far down the stream in the far distance.  'Ha! what is
+that?  I thought I saw a kind of Fata Morgana, green meadows, waving
+groves, a rustic home; but in the far distance--I stared--I stared--a
+Fata Morgana--it was gone. . . . '
+
+I left the balustrade and walked to the farther end of the bridge, where
+I stood for some time contemplating the crowd; I then passed over to the
+other side with an intention of returning home; just half-way over the
+bridge, in a booth immediately opposite to the one in which I had
+formerly beheld her, sat my friend, the old apple-woman, huddled up
+behind her stall.
+
+'Well, mother,' said I, 'how are you?'  The old woman lifted her head
+with a startled look.
+
+'Don't you know me?' said I.
+
+'Yes, I think I do.  Ah, yes,' said she, as her features beamed with
+recollection, 'I know you, dear; you are the young lad that gave me the
+tanner.  Well, child, got anything to sell?'
+
+'Nothing at all,' said I.
+
+'Bad luck?'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'bad enough, and ill usage.'
+
+'Ah, I suppose they caught ye; well, child, never mind, better luck next
+time; I am glad to see you.'
+
+'Thank you,' said I, sitting down on the stone bench; 'I thought you had
+left the bridge--why have you changed your side?'
+
+The old woman shook.
+
+'What is the matter with you,' said I; 'are you ill?'
+
+'No, child, no; only--'
+
+'Only what?  Any bad news of your son?'
+
+'No, child, no; nothing about my son.  Only low, child--every heart has
+its bitters.'
+
+'That's true,' said I; 'well, I don't want to know your sorrows; come,
+where's the book?'
+
+The apple-woman shook more violently than before, bent herself down, and
+drew her cloak more closely about her than before.  'Book, child, what
+book?'
+
+'Why, blessed Mary, to be sure.'
+
+'Oh, that; I ha'n't got it, child--I have lost it, have left it at home.'
+
+'Lost it,' said I; 'left it at home--what do you mean?  Come, let me have
+it.'
+
+'I ha'n't got it, child.'
+
+'I believe you have got it under your cloak.'
+
+'Don't tell any one, dear; don't--don't,' and the apple-woman burst into
+tears.
+
+'What's the matter with you?' said I, staring at her.
+
+'You want to take my book from me?'
+
+'Not I, I care nothing about it; keep it, if you like, only tell me
+what's the matter?'
+
+'Why, all about that book.'
+
+'The book?'
+
+'Yes, they wanted to take it from me.'
+
+'Who did?'
+
+'Why, some wicked boys.  I'll tell you all about it.  Eight or ten days
+ago, I sat behind my stall, reading my book; all of a sudden I felt it
+snatched from my hand, up I started, and see three rascals of boys
+grinning at me; one of them held the book in his hand.  "What book is
+this?" said he, grinning at it.  "What do you want with my book?" said I,
+clutching at it over my stall; "give me my book."  "What do you want a
+book for?" said he, holding it back; "I have a good mind to fling it into
+the Thames."  "Give me my book," I shrieked; and, snatching at it, I fell
+over my stall, and all my fruit was scattered about.  Off ran the
+boys--off ran the rascal with my book.  Oh dear, I thought I should have
+died; up I got, however, and ran after them as well as I could; I thought
+of my fruit, but I thought more of my book.  I left my fruit and ran
+after my book.  "My book! my book!" I shrieked, "murder! theft! robbery!"
+I was near being crushed under the wheels of a cart; but I didn't care--I
+followed the rascals.  "Stop them! stop them!"  I ran nearly as fast as
+they--they couldn't run very fast on account of the crowd.  At last some
+one stopped the rascal, whereupon he turned round, and flinging the book
+at me, it fell into the mud; well, I picked it up and kissed it, all
+muddy as it was.  "Has he robbed you?" said the man.  "Robbed me, indeed;
+why he had got my book."  "Oh, your book," said the man, and laughed, and
+let the rascal go.  Ah, he might laugh, but--'
+
+'Well, go on.'
+
+'My heart beats so.  Well, I went back to my booth and picked up my stall
+and my fruits, what I could find of them.  I couldn't keep my stall for
+two days I got such a fright, and when I got round I couldn't bide the
+booth where the thing had happened, so I came over to the other side.  Oh,
+the rascals, if I could but see them hanged.'
+
+'For what?'
+
+'Why, for stealing my book.'
+
+'I thought you didn't dislike stealing,--that you were ready to buy
+things--there was your son, you know--'
+
+'Yes, to be sure.'
+
+'He took things.'
+
+'To be sure he did.'
+
+'But you don't like a thing of yours to be taken.'
+
+'No, that's quite a different thing; what's stealing handkerchiefs, and
+that kind of thing, to do with taking my book? there's a wide
+difference--don't you see?'
+
+'Yes, I see.'
+
+'Do you, dear? well, bless your heart, I'm glad you do.  Would you like
+to look at the book?'
+
+'Well, I think I should.'
+
+'Honour bright?' said the apple-woman, looking me in the eyes.
+
+'Honour bright,' said I, looking the apple-woman in the eyes.
+
+'Well then, dear, here it is,' said she, taking it from under her cloak;
+'read it as long as you like, only get a little farther into the booth--
+Don't sit so near the edge--you might--'
+
+I went deep into the booth, and the apple-woman, bringing her chair
+round, almost confronted me.  I commenced reading the book, and was soon
+engrossed by it; hours passed away, once or twice I lifted up my eyes,
+the apple-woman was still confronting me: at last my eyes began to ache,
+whereupon I returned the book to the apple-woman, and, giving her another
+tanner, walked away.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLI
+
+
+Decease of the Review--Homer himself--Bread and cheese--Finger and
+thumb--Impossible to find--Something grand--Universal mixture--Some other
+publisher.
+
+Time passed away, and with it the Review, which, contrary to the
+publisher's expectation, did not prove a successful speculation.  About
+four months after the period of its birth it expired, as all Reviews must
+for which there is no demand.  Authors had ceased to send their
+publications to it, and, consequently, to purchase it; for I have already
+hinted that it was almost entirely supported by authors of a particular
+class, who expected to see their publications foredoomed to immortality
+in its pages.  The behaviour of these authors towards this unfortunate
+publication I can attribute to no other cause than to a report which was
+industriously circulated, namely, that the Review was low, and that to be
+reviewed in it was an infallible sign that one was a low person, who
+could be reviewed nowhere else.  So authors took fright; and no wonder,
+for it will never do for an author to be considered low.  Homer himself
+has never yet entirely recovered from the injury he received by Lord
+Chesterfield's remark that the speeches of his heroes were frequently
+exceedingly low.
+
+So the Review ceased, and the reviewing corps no longer existed as such;
+they forthwith returned to their proper avocations--the editor to compose
+tunes on his piano, and to the task of disposing of the remaining copies
+of his Quintilian--the inferior members to working for the publisher,
+being to a man dependants of his; one, to composing fairy tales; another,
+to collecting miracles of Popish saints; and a third, Newgate lives and
+trials.  Owing to the bad success of the Review, the publisher became
+more furious than ever.  My money was growing short, and I one day asked
+him to pay me for my labours in the deceased publication.
+
+'Sir,' said the publisher, 'what do you want the money for?'
+
+'Merely to live on,' I replied; 'it is very difficult to live in this
+town without money.'
+
+'How much money did you bring with you to town?' demanded the publisher.
+
+'Some twenty or thirty pounds,' I replied.
+
+'And you have spent it already?'
+
+'No,' said I, 'not entirely; but it is fast disappearing.'
+
+'Sir,' said the publisher, 'I believe you to be extravagant; yes, sir,
+extravagant!'
+
+'On what grounds do you suppose me to be so?'
+
+'Sir,' said the publisher, 'you eat meat.'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'I eat meat sometimes; what should I eat?'
+
+'Bread, sir,' said the publisher; 'bread and cheese.'
+
+'So I do, sir, when I am disposed to indulge; but I cannot often afford
+it--it is very expensive to dine on bread and cheese, especially when one
+is fond of cheese, as I am.  My last bread and cheese dinner cost me
+fourteenpence.  There is drink, sir; with bread and cheese one must drink
+porter, sir.'
+
+'Then, sir, eat bread--bread alone.  As good men as yourself have eaten
+bread alone; they have been glad to get it, sir.  If with bread and
+cheese you must drink porter, sir, with bread alone you can, perhaps,
+drink water, sir.'
+
+However, I got paid at last for my writings in the Review, not, it is
+true, in the current coin of the realm, but in certain bills; there were
+two of them, one payable at twelve, and the other at eighteen months
+after date.  It was a long time before I could turn these bills to any
+account; at last I found a person who, at a discount of only thirty per
+cent, consented to cash them; not, however, without sundry grimaces, and,
+what was still more galling, holding, more than once, the unfortunate
+papers high in air between his forefinger and thumb.  So ill, indeed, did
+I like this last action, that I felt much inclined to snatch them away.  I
+restrained myself, however, for I remembered that it was very difficult
+to live without money, and that, if the present person did not discount
+the bills, I should probably find no one else that would.
+
+But if the treatment which I had experienced from the publisher, previous
+to making this demand upon him, was difficult to bear, that which I
+subsequently underwent was far more so: his great delight seemed to
+consist in causing me misery and mortification; if, on former occasions,
+he was continually sending me in quest of lives and trials difficult to
+find, he now was continually demanding lives and trials which it was
+impossible to find; the personages whom he mentioned never having lived,
+nor consequently been tried.  Moreover, some of my best lives and trials
+which I had corrected and edited with particular care, and on which I
+prided myself no little, he caused to be cancelled after they had passed
+through the press.  Amongst these was the life of 'Gentleman Harry.'
+'They are drugs, sir,' said the publisher, 'drugs; that life of Harry
+Simms has long been the greatest drug in the calendar--has it not,
+Taggart?'
+
+Taggart made no answer save by taking a pinch of snuff.  The reader, has,
+I hope, not forgotten Taggart, whom I mentioned whilst giving an account
+of my first morning's visit to the publisher.  I beg Taggart's pardon for
+having been so long silent about him; but he was a very silent man--yet
+there was much in Taggart--and Taggart had always been civil and kind to
+me in his peculiar way.
+
+'Well, young gentleman,' said Taggart to me one morning, when we chanced
+to be alone a few days after the affair of the cancelling, 'how do you
+like authorship?'
+
+'I scarcely call authorship the drudgery I am engaged in,' said I.
+
+'What do you call authorship?' said Taggart.
+
+'I scarcely know,' said I; 'that is, I can scarcely express what I think
+it.'
+
+'Shall I help you out?' said Taggart, turning round his chair, and
+looking at me.
+
+'If you like,' said I.
+
+'To write something grand,' said Taggart, taking snuff; 'to be stared
+at--lifted on people's shoulders--'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'that is something like it.'
+
+Taggart took snuff.  'Well,' said he, 'why don't you write something
+grand?'
+
+'I have,' said I.
+
+'What?' said Taggart.
+
+'Why,' said I, 'there are those ballads.'
+
+Taggart took snuff.
+
+'And those wonderful versions from Ab Gwilym.'
+
+Taggart took snuff again.
+
+'You seem to be very fond of snuff,' said I, looking at him angrily.
+
+Taggart tapped his box.
+
+'Have you taken it long?'
+
+'Three-and-twenty years.'
+
+'What snuff do you take?'
+
+'Universal mixture.'
+
+'And you find it of use?
+
+Taggart tapped his box.
+
+'In what respect?' said I.
+
+'In many--there is nothing like it to get a man through; but for snuff I
+should scarcely be where I am now.'
+
+'Have you been long here?'
+
+'Three-and-twenty years.'
+
+'Dear me,' said I; 'and snuff brought you through?  Give me a pinch--pah,
+I don't like it,' and I sneezed.
+
+'Take another pinch,' said Taggart.
+
+'No,' said I, 'I don't like snuff.'
+
+'Then you will never do for authorship; at least for this kind.'
+
+'So I begin to think--what shall I do?'
+
+Taggart took snuff.
+
+'You were talking of a great work--what shall it be?'
+
+Taggart took snuff.
+
+'Do you think I could write one?'
+
+Taggart uplifted his two forefingers as if to tap, he did not however.
+
+'It would require time,' said I, with a half sigh.
+
+Taggart tapped his box.
+
+'A great deal of time; I really think that my ballads--'
+
+Taggart took snuff.
+
+'If published, would do me credit.  I'll make an effort, and offer them
+to some other publisher.'
+
+Taggart took a double quantity of snuff.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLII
+
+
+Francis Ardry--That won't do, sir--Observe my gestures--I think you
+improve--Better than politics--Delightful young Frenchwoman--A burning
+shame--Magnificent impudence--Paunch--Voltaire--Lump of sugar.
+
+Occasionally I called on Francis Ardry.  This young gentleman resided in
+handsome apartments in the neighbourhood of a fashionable square, kept a
+livery servant, and, upon the whole, lived in very good style.  Going to
+see him one day, between one and two, I was informed by the servant that
+his master was engaged for the moment, but that, if I pleased to wait a
+few minutes, I should find him at liberty.  Having told the man that I
+had no objection, he conducted me into a small apartment which served as
+antechamber to a drawing-room; the door of this last being half open, I
+could see Francis Ardry at the farther end, speechifying and
+gesticulating in a very impressive manner.  The servant, in some
+confusion, was hastening to close the door; but, ere he could effect his
+purpose, Francis Ardry, who had caught a glimpse of me, exclaimed, 'Come
+in--come in by all means'; and then proceeded, as before, speechifying
+and gesticulating.  Filled with some surprise, I obeyed his summons.
+
+On entering the room I perceived another individual, to whom Francis
+Ardry appeared to be addressing himself; this other was a short spare man
+of about sixty; his hair was of badger gray, and his face was covered
+with wrinkles--without vouchsafing me a look, he kept his eye, which was
+black and lustrous, fixed full on Francis Ardry, as if paying the deepest
+attention to his discourse.  All of a sudden, however, he cried with a
+sharp, cracked voice, 'That won't do, sir; that won't do--more
+vehemence--your argument is at present particularly weak; therefore, more
+vehemence--you must confuse them, stun them, stultify them, sir'; and, at
+each of these injunctions, he struck the back of his right hand sharply
+against the palm of the left.  'Good, sir--good!' he occasionally
+uttered, in the same sharp, cracked tone, as the voice of Francis Ardry
+became more and more vehement.  'Infinitely good!' he exclaimed, as
+Francis Ardry raised his voice to the highest pitch; 'and now, sir,
+abate; let the tempest of vehemence decline--gradually, sir; not too
+fast.  Good, sir--very good!' as the voice of Francis Ardry declined
+gradually in vehemence.  'And now a little pathos, sir--try them with a
+little pathos.  That won't do, sir--that won't do,'--as Francis Ardry
+made an attempt to become pathetic,--'that will never pass for
+pathos--with tones and gesture of that description you will never redress
+the wrongs of your country.  Now, sir, observe my gestures, and pay
+attention to the tone of my voice, sir.'
+
+Thereupon, making use of nearly the same terms which Francis Ardry had
+employed, the individual in black uttered several sentences in tones and
+with gestures which were intended to express a considerable degree of
+pathos, though it is possible that some people would have thought both
+the one and the other highly ludicrous.  After a pause, Francis Ardry
+recommenced imitating the tones and the gestures of his monitor in the
+most admirable manner.  Before he had proceeded far, however, he burst
+into a fit of laughter, in which I should, perhaps, have joined, provided
+it were ever my wont to laugh.  'Ha, ha!' said the other,
+good-humouredly, 'you are laughing at me.  Well, well, I merely wished to
+give you a hint; but you saw very well what I meant; upon the whole I
+think you improve.  But I must now go, having two other pupils to visit
+before four.'
+
+Then taking from the table a kind of three-cornered hat, and a cane
+headed with amber, he shook Francis Ardry by the hand; and, after
+glancing at me for a moment, made me a half bow, attended with a strange
+grimace, and departed.
+
+'Who is that gentleman?' said I to Francis Ardry, as soon as were alone.
+
+'Oh, that is--' said Frank, smiling, 'the gentleman who gives me lessons
+in elocution.'
+
+'And what need have you of elocution?'
+
+'Oh, I merely obey the commands of my guardians,' said Francis, 'who
+insist that I should, with the assistance of ---, qualify myself for
+Parliament; for which they do me the honour to suppose that I have some
+natural talent.  I dare not disobey them; for, at the present moment, I
+have particular reasons for wishing to keep on good terms with them.'
+
+'But,' said I, 'you are a Roman Catholic; and I thought that persons of
+your religion were excluded from Parliament?'
+
+'Why, upon that very thing the whole matter hinges; people of our
+religion are determined to be no longer excluded from Parliament, but to
+have a share in the government of the nation.  Not that I care anything
+about the matter; I merely obey the will of my guardians; my thoughts are
+fixed on something better than politics.'
+
+'I understand you,' said I; 'dog-fighting--well, I can easily conceive
+that to some minds dog-fighting--'
+
+'I was not thinking of dog-fighting,' said Francis Ardry, interrupting
+me.
+
+'Not thinking of dog-fighting!' I ejaculated.
+
+'No,' said Francis Ardry, 'something higher and much more rational than
+dog-fighting at present occupies my thoughts.'
+
+'Dear me,' said I, 'I thought I had heard you say that there was nothing
+like it!'
+
+'Like what?' said Francis Ardry.
+
+'Dog-fighting, to be sure,' said I.
+
+'Pooh,' said Francis Ardry; 'who but the gross and unrefined care
+anything for dog-fighting?  That which at present engages my waking and
+sleeping thoughts is love--divine love--there is nothing like _that_.
+Listen to me, I have a secret to confide to you.'
+
+And then Francis Ardry proceeded to make me his confidant.  It appeared
+that he had had the good fortune to make the acquaintance of the most
+delightful young Frenchwoman imaginable, Annette La Noire by name, who
+had just arrived from her native country with the intention of obtaining
+the situation of governess in some English family; a position which, on
+account of her many accomplishments, she was eminently qualified to fill.
+Francis Ardry had, however, persuaded her to relinquish her intention for
+the present, on the ground that, until she had become acclimated in
+England, her health would probably suffer from the confinement
+inseparable from the occupation in which she was desirous of engaging; he
+had, moreover--for it appeared that she was the most frank and confiding
+creature in the world--succeeded in persuading her to permit him to hire
+for her a very handsome first floor in his own neighbourhood, and to
+accept a few inconsiderable presents in money and jewellery.  'I am
+looking out for a handsome gig and horse,' said Francis Ardry, at the
+conclusion of his narration; 'it were a burning shame that so divine a
+creature should have to go about a place like London on foot, or in a
+paltry hackney coach.'
+
+'But,' said I, 'will not the pursuit of politics prevent your devoting
+much time to this fair lady?'
+
+'It will prevent me devoting all my time,' said Francis Ardry, 'as I
+gladly would; but what can I do?  My guardians wish me to qualify myself
+for a political orator, and I dare not offend them by a refusal.  If I
+offend my guardians, I should find it impossible--unless I have recourse
+to Jews and money-lenders--to support Annette; present her with articles
+of dress and jewellery, and purchase a horse and cabriolet worthy of
+conveying her angelic person through the streets of London.'
+
+After a pause, in which Francis Ardry appeared lost in thought, his mind
+being probably occupied with the subject of Annette, I broke silence by
+observing, 'So your fellow-religionists are really going to make a
+serious attempt to procure their emancipation?'
+
+'Yes,' said Francis Ardry, starting from his reverie; 'everything has
+been arranged; even a leader has been chosen, at least for us of Ireland,
+upon the whole the most suitable man in the world for the occasion--a
+barrister of considerable talent, mighty voice, and magnificent
+impudence.  With emancipation, liberty, and redress for the wrongs of
+Ireland in his mouth, he is to force his way into the British House of
+Commons, dragging myself and others behind him--he will succeed, and when
+he is in he will cut a figure; I have heard ---- himself, who has heard him
+speak, say that he will cut a figure.'
+
+'And is ---- competent to judge?' I demanded.
+
+'Who but he?' said Francis Ardry; 'no one questions his judgment
+concerning what relates to elocution.  His fame on that point is so well
+established, that the greatest orators do not disdain occasionally to
+consult him; C--- himself, as I have been told, when anxious to produce
+any particular effect in the House, is in the habit of calling in ---- for a
+consultation.'
+
+'As to matter, or manner?' said I.
+
+'Chiefly the latter,' said Francis Ardry, 'though he is competent to give
+advice as to both, for he has been an orator in his day, and a leader of
+the people; though he confessed to me that he was not exactly qualified
+to play the latter part--"I want paunch," said he.'
+
+'It is not always indispensable,' said I; 'there is an orator in my town,
+a hunchback and watchmaker, without it, who not only leads the people,
+but the mayor too; perhaps he has a succedaneum in his hunch: but, tell
+me, is the leader of your movement in possession of that which ---- wants?'
+
+'No more deficient in it than in brass,' said Francis Ardry.
+
+'Well,' said I, 'whatever his qualifications may be, I wish him success
+in the cause which he has taken up--I love religious liberty.'
+
+'We shall succeed,' said Francis Ardry; 'John Bull upon the whole is
+rather indifferent on the subject, and then we are sure to be backed by
+the Radical party, who, to gratify their political prejudices, would join
+with Satan himself.'
+
+'There is one thing,' said I, 'connected with this matter which surprises
+me--your own lukewarmness.  Yes, making every allowance for your natural
+predilection for dog-fighting, and your present enamoured state of mind,
+your apathy at the commencement of such a movement is to me
+unaccountable.'
+
+'You would not have cause to complain of my indifference,' said Frank,
+'provided I thought my country would be benefited by this movement; but I
+happen to know the origin of it.  The priests are the originators, 'and
+what country was ever benefited by a movement which owed its origin to
+them?' so says Voltaire, a page of whom I occasionally read.  By the
+present move they hope to increase their influence, and to further
+certain designs which they entertain both with regard to this country and
+Ireland.  I do not speak rashly or unadvisedly.  A strange fellow--a half-
+Italian, half-English priest,--who was recommended to me by my guardians,
+partly as a spiritual, partly as a temporal guide, has let me into a
+secret or two; he is fond of a glass of gin and water--and over a glass
+of gin and water cold, with a lump of sugar in it, he has been more
+communicative, perhaps, than was altogether prudent.  Were I my own
+master, I would kick him, politics, and religious movements, to a
+considerable distance.  And now, if you are going away, do so quickly; I
+have an appointment with Annette, and must make myself fit to appear
+before her.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIII
+
+
+Progress--Glorious John--Utterly unintelligible--What a difference.
+
+By the month of October I had, in spite of all difficulties and
+obstacles, accomplished about two-thirds of the principal task which I
+had undertaken, the compiling of the Newgate lives; I had also made some
+progress in translating the publisher's philosophy into German.  But
+about this time I began to see very clearly that it was impossible that
+our connection should prove of long duration; yet, in the event of my
+leaving the big man, what other resource had I--another publisher?  But
+what had I to offer?  There were my ballads, my Ab Gwilym, but then I
+thought of Taggart and his snuff, his pinch of snuff.  However, I
+determined to see what could be done, so I took my ballads under my arm,
+and went to various publishers; some took snuff, others did not, but none
+took my ballads or Ab Gwilym, they would not even look at them.  One
+asked me if I had anything else--he was a snuff-taker--I said yes; and
+going home, returned with my translation of the German novel, to which I
+have before alluded.  After keeping it for a fortnight, he returned it to
+me on my visiting him, and, taking a pinch of snuff, told me it would not
+do.  There were marks of snuff on the outside of the manuscript, which
+was a roll of paper bound with red tape, but there were no marks of snuff
+on the interior of the manuscript, from which I concluded that he had
+never opened it.
+
+I had often heard of one Glorious John, who lived at the western end of
+the town; on consulting Taggart, he told me that it was possible that
+Glorious John would publish my ballads and Ab Gwilym, that is, said he,
+taking a pinch of snuff, provided you can see him; so I went to the house
+where Glorious John resided, and a glorious house it was, but I could not
+see Glorious John--I called a dozen times, but I never could see Glorious
+John.  Twenty years after, by the greatest chance in the world, I saw
+Glorious John, and sure enough Glorious John published my books, but they
+were different books from the first; I never offered my ballads or Ab
+Gwilym to Glorious John.  Glorious John was no snuff-taker.  He asked me
+to dinner, and treated me with superb Rhenish wine.  Glorious John is now
+gone to his rest, but I--what was I going to say?--the world will never
+forget Glorious John.
+
+So I returned to my last resource for the time then being--to the
+publisher, persevering doggedly in my labour.  One day, on visiting the
+publisher, I found him stamping with fury upon certain fragments of
+paper.  'Sir,' said he, 'you know nothing of German; I have shown your
+translation of the first chapter of my Philosophy to several Germans: it
+is utterly unintelligible to them.'  'Did they see the Philosophy?' I
+replied.  'They did, sir, but they did not profess to understand
+English.'  'No more do I,'  I replied, 'if that Philosophy be English.'
+
+The publisher was furious--I was silent.  For want of a pinch of snuff, I
+had recourse to something which is no bad substitute for a pinch of
+snuff, to those who can't take it, silent contempt; at first it made the
+publisher more furious, as perhaps a pinch of snuff would; it, however,
+eventually calmed him, and he ordered me back to my occupations, in other
+words, the compilation.  To be brief, the compilation was completed, I
+got paid in the usual manner, and forthwith left him.
+
+He was a clever man, but what a difference in clever men!
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIV
+
+
+The old spot--A long history--Thou shalt not steal--No
+harm--Education--Necessity--Foam on your lip--Apples and pears--What will
+you read?--Metaphor--The fur cap--I don't know him.
+
+It was past midwinter, and I sat on London Bridge, in company with the
+old apple-woman: she had just returned to the other side of the bridge,
+to her place in the booth where I had originally found her.  This she had
+done after frequent conversations with me; 'she liked the old place
+best,' she said, which she would never have left but for the terror which
+she experienced when the boys ran away with her book.  So I sat with her
+at the old spot, one afternoon past midwinter, reading the book, of which
+I had by this time come to the last pages.  I had observed that the old
+woman for some time past had shown much less anxiety about the book than
+she had been in the habit of doing.  I was, however, not quite prepared
+for her offering to make me a present of it, which she did that
+afternoon; when, having finished it, I returned it to her, with many
+thanks for the pleasure and instruction I had derived from its perusal.
+'You may keep it, dear,' said the old woman, with a sigh; 'you may carry
+it to your lodging, and keep it for your own.'
+
+Looking at the old woman with surprise, I exclaimed, 'Is it possible that
+you are willing to part with the book which has been your source of
+comfort so long?'
+
+Whereupon the old woman entered into a long history, from which I
+gathered that the book had become distasteful to her; she hardly ever
+opened it of late, she said, or if she did, it was only to shut it again;
+also, that other things which she had been fond of, though of a widely
+different kind, were now distasteful to her.  Porter and beef-steaks were
+no longer grateful to her palate, her present diet chiefly consisting of
+tea, and bread and butter.
+
+'Ah,' said I, 'you have been ill, and when people are ill, they seldom
+like the things which give them pleasure when they are in health.'  I
+learned, moreover, that she slept little at night, and had all kinds of
+strange thoughts; that as she lay awake many things connected with her
+youth, which she had quite forgotten, came into her mind.  There were
+certain words that came into her mind the night before the last, which
+were continually humming in her ears: I found that the words were, 'Thou
+shalt not steal.'
+
+On inquiring where she had first heard these words, I learned that she
+had read them at school, in a book called the primer; to this school she
+had been sent by her mother, who was a poor widow, and followed the trade
+of apple-selling in the very spot where her daughter followed it now.  It
+seems that the mother was a very good kind of woman, but quite ignorant
+of letters, the benefit of which she was willing to procure for her
+child; and at the school the daughter learned to read, and subsequently
+experienced the pleasure and benefit of letters, in being able to read
+the book which she found in an obscure closet of her mother's house, and
+which had been her principal companion and comfort for many years of her
+life.
+
+But, as I have said before, she was now dissatisfied with the book, and
+with most other things in which she had taken pleasure; she dwelt much on
+the words, 'Thou shalt not steal'; she had never stolen things herself,
+but then she had bought things which other people had stolen, and which
+she knew had been stolen; and her dear son had been a thief, which he
+perhaps would not have been but for the example which she set him in
+buying things from characters, as she called them, who associated with
+her.
+
+On inquiring how she had become acquainted with these characters, I
+learned that times had gone hard with her; that she had married, but her
+husband had died after a long sickness, which had reduced them to great
+distress; that her fruit trade was not a profitable one, and that she had
+bought and sold things which had been stolen to support herself and her
+son.  That for a long time she supposed there was no harm in doing so, as
+her book was full of entertaining tales of stealing; but she now thought
+that the book was a bad book, and that learning to read was a bad thing;
+her mother had never been able to read, but had died in peace, though
+poor.
+
+So here was a woman who attributed the vices and follies of her life to
+being able to read; her mother, she said, who could not read, lived
+respectably, and died in peace; and what was the essential difference
+between the mother and daughter, save that the latter could read?  But
+for her literature she might in all probability have lived respectably
+and honestly, like her mother, and might eventually have died in peace,
+which at present she could scarcely hope to do.  Education had failed to
+produce any good in this poor woman; on the contrary, there could be
+little doubt that she had been injured by it.  Then was education a bad
+thing?  Rousseau was of opinion that it was; but Rousseau was a
+Frenchman, at least wrote in French, and I cared not the snap of my
+fingers for Rousseau.  But education has certainly been of benefit in
+some instances; well, what did that prove, but that partiality existed in
+the management of the affairs of the world--if education was a benefit to
+some, why was it not a benefit to others?  Could some avoid abusing it,
+any more than others could avoid turning it to a profitable account?  I
+did not see how they could; this poor simple woman found a book in her
+mother's closet; a book, which was a capital book for those who could
+turn it to the account for which it was intended; a book, from the
+perusal of which I felt myself wiser and better, but which was by no
+means suited to the intellect of this poor simple woman, who thought that
+it was written in praise of thieving; yet she found it, she read it,
+and--and--I felt myself getting into a maze; what is right, thought I?
+what is wrong?  Do I exist?  Does the world exist? if it does, every
+action is bound up with necessity.
+
+'Necessity!' I exclaimed, and cracked my finger-joints.
+
+'Ah, it is a bad thing,' said the old woman.
+
+'What is a bad thing?' said I.
+
+'Why to be poor, dear.'
+
+'You talk like a fool,' said I, 'riches and poverty are only different
+forms of necessity.'
+
+'You should not call me a fool, dear; you should not call your own mother
+a fool.'
+
+'You are not my mother,' said I.
+
+'Not your mother, dear?--no, no more I am; but your calling me fool put
+me in mind of my dear son, who often used to call me fool--and you just
+now looked as he sometimes did, with a blob of foam on your lip.'
+
+'After all, I don't know that you are not my mother.'
+
+'Don't you, dear?  I'm glad of it; I wish you would make it out.'
+
+'How should I make it out? who can speak from his own knowledge as to the
+circumstances of his birth?  Besides, before attempting to establish our
+relationship, it would be necessary to prove that such people exist.'
+
+'What people, dear?'
+
+'You and I.'
+
+'Lord, child, you are mad; that book has made you so.'
+
+'Don't abuse it,' said I; 'the book is an excellent one, that is,
+provided it exists.'
+
+'I wish it did not,' said the old woman; 'but it shan't long; I'll burn
+it, or fling it into the river--the voices at night tell me to do so.'
+
+'Tell the voices,' said I, 'that they talk nonsense; the book, if it
+exists, is a good book, it contains a deep moral; have you read it all?'
+
+'All the funny parts, dear; all about taking things, and the manner it
+was done; as for the rest, I could not exactly make it out.'
+
+'Then the book is not to blame; I repeat that the book is a good book,
+and contains deep morality, always supposing that there is such a thing
+as morality, which is the same thing as supposing that there is anything
+at all.'
+
+'Anything at all!  Why ain't we here on this bridge, in my booth, with my
+stall and my--'
+
+'Apples and pears, baked hot, you would say--I don't know; all is a
+mystery, a deep question.  It is a question, and probably always will be,
+whether there is a world, and consequently apples and pears; and,
+provided there be a world, whether that world be like an apple or a
+pear.'
+
+'Don't talk so, dear.'
+
+'I won't; we will suppose that we all exist--world, ourselves, apples,
+and pears: so you wish to get rid of the book?'
+
+'Yes, dear, I wish you would take it.'
+
+'I have read it, and have no farther use for it; I do not need books: in
+a little time, perhaps, I shall not have a place wherein to deposit
+myself, far less books.'
+
+'Then I will fling it into the river.'
+
+'Don't do that; here, give it me.  Now what shall I do with it? you were
+so fond of it.'
+
+'I am so no longer.'
+
+'But how will you pass your time; what will you read?'
+
+'I wish I had never learned to read, or, if I had, that I had only read
+the books I saw at school: the primer or the other.'
+
+'What was the other?'
+
+'I think they called it the Bible: all about God, and Job, and Jesus.'
+
+'Ah, I know it.'
+
+'You have read it; is it a nice book--all true?'
+
+'True, true--I don't know what to say; but if the world be true, and not
+all a lie, a fiction, I don't see why the Bible, as they call it, should
+not be true.  By the bye, what do you call Bible in your tongue, or,
+indeed, book of any kind? as Bible merely means a book.'
+
+'What do I call the Bible in my language, dear?'
+
+'Yes, the language of those who bring you things.'
+
+'The language of those who _did_, dear; they bring them now no longer.
+They call me fool, as you did, dear, just now; they call kissing the
+Bible, which means taking a false oath, smacking calf-skin.'
+
+'That's metaphor,' said I; 'English, but metaphorical; what an odd
+language!  So you would like to have a Bible,--shall I buy you one?'
+
+'I am poor, dear--no money since I left off the other trade.'
+
+'Well, then, I'll buy you one.'
+
+'No, dear, no; you are poor, and may soon want the money; but if you can
+take me one conveniently on the sly, you know--I think you may, for, as
+it is a good book, I suppose there can be no harm in taking it.'
+
+'That will never do,' said I, 'more especially as I should be sure to be
+caught, not having made taking of things my trade; but I'll tell you what
+I'll do--try and exchange this book of yours for a Bible; who knows for
+what great things this same book of yours may serve?'
+
+'Well, dear,' said the old woman, 'do as you please; I should like to see
+the--what do you call it?--Bible, and to read it, as you seem to think it
+true.'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'seem; that is the way to express yourself in this maze of
+doubt--I seem to think--these apples and pears seem to be--and here seems
+to be a gentleman who wants to purchase either one or the other.'
+
+A person had stopped before the apple-woman's stall, and was glancing now
+at the fruit, now at the old woman and myself; he wore a blue mantle, and
+had a kind of fur cap on his head; he was somewhat above the middle
+stature; his features were keen, but rather hard; there was a slight
+obliquity in his vision.  Selecting a small apple, he gave the old woman
+a penny; then, after looking at me scrutinisingly for a moment, he moved
+from the booth in the direction of Southwark.
+
+'Do you know who that man is?' said I to the old woman.
+
+'No,' said she, 'except that he is one of my best customers: he
+frequently stops, takes an apple, and gives me a penny; his is the only
+piece of money I have taken this blessed day.  I don't know him, but he
+has once or twice sat down in the booth with two strange-looking
+men--Mulattos, or Lascars, I think they call them.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLV
+
+
+Bought and exchanged--Quite empty--A new firm--Bibles--Countenance of a
+lion--Clap of thunder--A truce with this--I have lost it--Clearly a
+right--Goddess of the Mint.
+
+In pursuance of my promise to the old woman, I set about procuring her a
+Bible with all convenient speed, placing the book which she had intrusted
+to me for the purpose of exchange in my pocket.  I went to several shops,
+and asked if Bibles were to be had: I found that there were plenty.  When,
+however, I informed the people that I came to barter, they looked blank,
+and declined treating with me; saying that they did not do business in
+that way.  At last I went into a shop over the window of which I saw
+written, 'Books bought and exchanged': there was a smartish young fellow
+in the shop, with black hair and whiskers; 'You exchange?' said I.  'Yes,'
+said he, 'sometimes, but we prefer selling; what book do you want?'  'A
+Bible,' said I.  'Ah,' said he, 'there's a great demand for Bibles just
+now; all kinds of people are become very pious of late,' he added,
+grinning at me; 'I am afraid I can't do business with you, more
+especially as the master is not at home.  What book have you brought?'
+Taking the book out of my pocket, I placed it on the counter: the young
+fellow opened the book, and inspecting the title-page, burst into a loud
+laugh.  'What do you laugh for?' said I, angrily, and half clenching my
+fist.  'Laugh!' said the young fellow; 'laugh! who could help laughing?'
+'I could,' said I; 'I see nothing to laugh at; I want to exchange this
+book for a Bible.'  'You do?' said the young fellow; 'well, I daresay
+there are plenty who would be willing to exchange, that is, if they
+dared.  I wish master were at home; but that would never do, either.
+Master's a family man, the Bibles are not mine, and master being a family
+man, is sharp, and knows all his stock; I'd buy it of you, but, to tell
+you the truth, I am quite empty here,' said he, pointing to his pocket,
+'so I am afraid we can't deal.'
+
+Whereupon, looking anxiously at the young man, 'What am I to do?' said I;
+'I really want a Bible.'
+
+'Can't you buy one?' said the young man; 'have you no money?'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'I have some, but I am merely the agent of another; I came
+to exchange, not to buy; what am I to do?'
+
+'I don't know,' said the young man, thoughtfully laying down the book on
+the counter; 'I don't know what you can do; I think you will find some
+difficulty in this bartering job, the trade are rather precise.'  All at
+once he laughed louder than before; suddenly stopping, however, he put on
+a very grave look.  'Take my advice,' said he; 'there is a firm
+established in this neighbourhood which scarcely sells any books but
+Bibles; they are very rich, and pride themselves on selling their books
+at the lowest possible price; apply to them, who knows but what they will
+exchange with you?'
+
+Thereupon I demanded with some eagerness of the young man the direction
+to the place where he thought it possible that I might effect the
+exchange--which direction the young fellow cheerfully gave me, and, as I
+turned away, had the civility to wish me success.
+
+I had no difficulty in finding the house to which the young fellow
+directed me; it was a very large house, situated in a square; and upon
+the side of the house was written in large letters, 'Bibles, and other
+religious books.'
+
+At the door of the house were two or three tumbrils, in the act of being
+loaded with chests, very much resembling tea-chests; one of the chests
+falling down, burst, and out flew, not tea, but various books, in a neat,
+small size, and in neat leather covers; Bibles, said I,--Bibles,
+doubtless.  I was not quite right, nor quite wrong; picking up one of the
+books, I looked at it for a moment, and found it to be the New Testament.
+'Come, young lad,' said a man who stood by, in the dress of a porter,
+'put that book down, it is none of yours; if you want a book, go in and
+deal for one.'
+
+Deal, thought I, deal,--the man seems to know what I am coming about,--and
+going in, I presently found myself in a very large room.  Behind a
+counter two men stood with their backs to a splendid fire, warming
+themselves, for the weather was cold.
+
+Of these men one was dressed in brown, and the other was dressed in
+black; both were tall men--he who was dressed in brown was thin, and had
+a particularly ill-natured countenance; the man dressed in black was
+bulky, his features were noble, but they were those of a lion.
+
+'What is your business, young man?' said the precise personage, as I
+stood staring at him and his companion.
+
+'I want a Bible,' said I.
+
+'What price, what size?' said the precise-looking man.
+
+'As to size,' said I, 'I should like to have a large one--that is, if you
+can afford me one--I do not come to buy.'
+
+'Oh, friend,' said the precise-looking man, 'if you come here expecting
+to have a Bible for nothing, you are mistaken--we--'
+
+'I would scorn to have a Bible for nothing,' said I, 'or anything else; I
+came not to beg, but to barter; there is no shame in that, especially in
+a country like this, where all folks barter.'
+
+'Oh, we don't barter,' said the precise man, 'at least Bibles; you had
+better depart.'
+
+'Stay, brother,' said the man with the countenance of a lion, 'let us ask
+a few questions; this may be a very important case; perhaps the young man
+has had convictions.'
+
+'Not I,' I exclaimed, 'I am convinced of nothing, and with regard to the
+Bible--I don't believe--'
+
+'Hey!' said the man with the lion countenance, and there he stopped.  But
+with that 'Hey' the walls of the house seemed to shake, the windows
+rattled, and the porter whom I had seen in front of the house came
+running up the steps, and looked into the apartment through the glass of
+the door.
+
+There was silence for about a minute--the same kind of silence which
+succeeds a clap of thunder.
+
+At last the man with the lion countenance, who had kept his eyes fixed
+upon me, said calmly, 'Were you about to say that you don't believe in
+the Bible, young man?'
+
+'No more than in anything else,' said I; 'you were talking of
+convictions--I have no convictions.  It is not easy to believe in the
+Bible till one is convinced that there is a Bible.'
+
+'He seems to be insane,' said the prim-looking man; 'we had better order
+the porter to turn him out.'
+
+'I am by no means certain,' said I, 'that the porter could turn me out;
+always provided there is a porter, and this system of ours be not a lie,
+and a dream.'
+
+'Come,' said the lion-looking man, impatiently, 'a truce with this
+nonsense.  If the porter cannot turn you out, perhaps some other person
+can; but to the point--you want a Bible?'
+
+'I do,' said I, 'but not for myself; I was sent by another person to
+offer something in exchange for one.'
+
+'And who is that person?'
+
+'A poor old woman, who has had what you call convictions,--heard voices,
+or thought she heard them--I forgot to ask her whether they were loud
+ones.'
+
+'What has she sent to offer in exchange?' said the man, without taking
+any notice of the concluding part of my speech.
+
+'A book,' said I.
+
+'Let me see it.'
+
+'Nay, brother,' said the precise man, 'this will never do; if we once
+adopt the system of barter, we shall have all the holders of useless
+rubbish in the town applying to us.'
+
+'I wish to see what he has brought,' said the other; 'perhaps Baxter, or
+Jewell's _Apology_, either of which would make a valuable addition to our
+collection.  Well, young man, what's the matter with you?'
+
+I stood like one petrified; I had put my hand into my pocket--the book
+was gone.
+
+'What's the matter?' repeated the man with the lion countenance, in a
+voice very much resembling thunder.
+
+'I have it not--I have lost it!'
+
+'A pretty story, truly,' said the precise-looking man, 'lost it!  You had
+better retire,' said the other.
+
+'How shall I appear before the party who intrusted me with the book?  She
+will certainly think that I have purloined it, notwithstanding all I can
+say; nor, indeed, can I blame her,--appearances are certainly against
+me.'
+
+'They are so--you had better retire.'
+
+I moved towards the door.  'Stay, young man, one word more; there is only
+one way of proceeding which would induce me to believe that you are
+sincere.'
+
+'What is that?' said I, stopping and looking at him anxiously.
+
+'The purchase of a Bible.'
+
+'Purchase!' said I, 'purchase!  I came not to purchase, but to barter;
+such was my instruction, and how can I barter if I have lost the book?'
+
+The other made no answer, and turning away I made for the door; all of a
+sudden I started, and turning round, 'Dear me,' said I, 'it has just come
+into my head, that if the book was lost by my negligence, as it must have
+been, I have clearly a right to make it good.'
+
+No answer.
+
+'Yes,' I repeated, 'I have clearly a right to make it good; how glad I
+am! see the effect of a little reflection.  I will purchase a Bible
+instantly, that is, if I have not lost--' and with considerable agitation
+I felt in my pocket.
+
+The prim-looking man smiled: 'I suppose,' said he, 'that he has lost his
+money as well as book.'
+
+'No,' said I, 'I have not'; and pulling out my hand I displayed no less a
+sum than three half-crowns.
+
+'Oh, noble goddess of the Mint!' as Dame Charlotta Nordenflycht, the
+Swede, said a hundred and fifty years ago, 'great is thy power; how
+energetically the possession of thee speaks in favour of man's
+character!'
+
+'Only half-a-crown for this Bible?' said I, putting down the money, 'it
+is worth three'; and bowing to the man of the noble features, I departed
+with my purchase.
+
+'Queer customer,' said the prim-looking man, as I was about to close the
+door--'don't like him.'
+
+'Why, as to that, I scarcely know what to say,' said he of the
+countenance of a lion.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVI
+
+
+The pickpocket--Strange rencounter--Drag him along--A great
+service--Things of importance--Philological matters--Mother of
+languages--Zhats!
+
+A few days after the occurrence of what is recorded in the last chapter,
+as I was wandering in the City, chance directed my footsteps to an alley
+leading from one narrow street to another in the neighbourhood of
+Cheapside.  Just before I reached the mouth of the alley, a man in a
+greatcoat, closely followed by another, passed it; and, at the moment in
+which they were passing, I observed the man behind snatch something from
+the pocket of the other; whereupon, darting into the street, I seized the
+hindermost man by the collar, crying at the same time to the other, 'My
+good friend, this person has just picked your pocket.'
+
+The individual whom I addressed, turning round with a start, glanced at
+me, and then at the person whom I held.  London is the place for strange
+rencounters.  It appeared to me that I recognised both individuals--the
+man whose pocket had been picked and the other; the latter now began to
+struggle violently; 'I have picked no one's pocket,' said he.  'Rascal,'
+said the other, 'you have got my pocket-book in your bosom.'  'No, I have
+not,' said the other; and, struggling more violently than before, the
+pocket-book dropped from his bosom upon the ground.
+
+The other was now about to lay hands upon the fellow, who was still
+struggling.  'You had better take up your book,' said I; 'I can hold
+him.'  He followed my advice; and, taking up his pocket-book, surveyed my
+prisoner with a ferocious look, occasionally glaring at me.  Yes, I had
+seen him before--it was the stranger whom I had observed on London
+Bridge, by the stall of the old apple-woman, with the cap and cloak; but,
+instead of these, he now wore a hat and greatcoat.  'Well,' said I, at
+last, 'what am I to do with this gentleman of ours?' nodding to the
+prisoner, who had now left off struggling.  'Shall I let him go?'
+
+'Go!' said the other; 'go!  The knave--the rascal; let him go, indeed!
+Not so, he shall go before the Lord Mayor.  Bring him along.'
+
+'Oh, let me go,' said the other: 'let me go; this is the first offence, I
+assure ye--the first time I ever thought to do anything wrong.'
+
+'Hold your tongue,' said I, 'or I shall be angry with you.  If I am not
+very much mistaken, you once attempted to cheat me.'
+
+'I never saw you before in all my life,' said the fellow, though his
+countenance seemed to belie his words.
+
+'That is not true,' said I; 'you are the man who attempted to cheat me of
+one-and-ninepence in the coach-yard, on the first morning of my arrival
+in London.'
+
+'I don't doubt it,' said the other; 'a confirmed thief'; and here his
+tones became peculiarly sharp; 'I would fain see him hanged--crucified.
+Drag him along.'
+
+'I am no constable,' said I; 'you have got your pocket-book,--I would
+rather you would bid me let him go.'
+
+'Bid you let him go!' said the other almost furiously, 'I command--stay,
+what was I going to say?  I was forgetting myself,' he observed more
+gently; 'but he stole my pocket-book;--if you did but know what it
+contained.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'if it contains anything valuable, be the more thankful
+that you have recovered it; as for the man, I will help you to take him
+where you please; but I wish you would let him go.'
+
+The stranger hesitated, and there was an extraordinary play of emotion in
+his features: he looked ferociously at the pickpocket, and, more than
+once, somewhat suspiciously at myself; at last his countenance cleared,
+and, with a good grace, he said, 'Well, you have done me a great service,
+and you have my consent to let him go; but the rascal shall not escape
+with impunity,' he exclaimed suddenly, as I let the man go, and starting
+forward, before the fellow could escape, he struck him a violent blow on
+the face.  The man staggered, and had nearly fallen; recovering himself,
+however, he said, 'I tell you what, my fellow; if I ever meet you in this
+street in a dark night, and I have a knife about me, it shall be the
+worse for you; as for you, young man,' said he to me; but, observing that
+the other was making towards him, he left whatever he was about to say
+unfinished, and, taking to his heels, was out of sight in a moment.
+
+The stranger and myself walked in the direction of Cheapside, the way in
+which he had been originally proceeding; he was silent for a few moments,
+at length he said, 'You have really done me a great service, and I should
+be ungrateful not to acknowledge it.  I am a merchant; and a merchant's
+pocket-book, as you perhaps know, contains many things of importance;
+but, young man,' he exclaimed, 'I think I have seen you before; I thought
+so at first, but where I cannot exactly say: where was it?'  I mentioned
+London Bridge and the old apple-woman.  'Oh,' said he, and smiled, and
+there was something peculiar in his smile, 'I remember now.  Do you
+frequently sit on London Bridge?'  'Occasionally,' said I; 'that old
+woman is an old friend of mine.'  'Friend?' said the stranger, 'I am glad
+of it, for I shall know where to find you.  At present I am going to
+'Change; time, you know, is precious to a merchant.'  We were by this
+time close to Cheapside.  'Farewell,' said he, 'I shall not forget this
+service.  I trust we shall soon meet again.'  He then shook me by the
+hand and went his way.
+
+The next day, as I was seated beside the old woman in the booth, the
+stranger again made his appearance, and, after a word or two, sat down
+beside me; the old woman was sometimes reading the Bible, which she had
+already had two or three days in her possession, and sometimes
+discoursing with me.  Our discourse rolled chiefly on philological
+matters.
+
+'What do you call bread in your language?' said I.
+
+'You mean the language of those who bring me things to buy, or who did;
+for, as I told you before, I shan't buy any more; it's no language of
+mine, dear--they call bread pannam in their language.'
+
+'Pannam!' said I, 'pannam! evidently connected with, if not derived from,
+the Latin panis; even as the word tanner, which signifieth a sixpence, is
+connected with, if not derived from, the Latin tener, which is itself
+connected with, if not derived from, tawno or tawner, which, in the
+language of Mr. Petulengro, signifieth a sucking child.  Let me see, what
+is the term for bread in the language of Mr. Petulengro?  Morro, or
+manro, as I have sometimes heard it called; is there not some connection
+between these words and panis?  Yes, I think there is; and I should not
+wonder if morro, manro, and panis were connected, perhaps derived from,
+the same root; but what is that root?  I don't know--I wish I did;
+though, perhaps, I should not be the happier.  Morro--manro!  I rather
+think morro is the oldest form; it is easier to say morro than manro.
+Morro!  Irish, aran; Welsh, bara; English, bread.  I can see a
+resemblance between all the words, and pannam too; and I rather think
+that the Petulengrian word is the elder.  How odd it would be if the
+language of Mr. Petulengro should eventually turn out to be the mother of
+all the languages in the world; yet it is certain that there are some
+languages in which the terms for bread have no connection with the word
+used by Mr. Petulengro, notwithstanding that those languages, in many
+other points, exhibit a close affinity to the language of the horse-shoe
+master: for example, bread, in Hebrew, is Laham, which assuredly exhibits
+little similitude to the word used by the aforesaid Petulengro.  In
+Armenian it is--'
+
+'Zhats!' said the stranger, starting up.  'By the Patriarch and the Three
+Holy Churches, this is wonderful!  How came you to know aught of
+Armenian?'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVII
+
+
+New acquaintance--Wired cases--Bread and wine--Armenian colonies--Learning
+without money--What a language--The tide--Your foible--Learning of the
+Haiks--Old proverb--Pressing invitation.
+
+Just as I was about to reply to the interrogation of my new-formed
+acquaintance, a man with a dusky countenance, probably one of the
+Lascars, or Mulattos, of whom the old woman had spoken, came up and
+whispered to him, and with this man he presently departed, not however
+before he had told me the place of his abode, and requested me to visit
+him.
+
+After the lapse of a few days, I called at the house which he had
+indicated.  It was situated in a dark and narrow street, in the heart of
+the City, at no great distance from the Bank.  I entered a counting-room,
+in which a solitary clerk, with a foreign look, was writing.  The
+stranger was not at home; returning the next day, however, I met him at
+the door as he was about to enter; he shook me warmly by the hand.  'I am
+glad to see you,' said he, 'follow me, I was just thinking of you.'  He
+led me through the counting-room, to an apartment up a flight of stairs;
+before ascending, however, he looked into the book in which the foreign-
+visaged clerk was writing, and, seemingly not satisfied with the manner
+in which he was executing his task, he gave him two or three cuffs,
+telling him at the same time that he deserved crucifixion.
+
+The apartment above stairs, to which he led me, was large, with three
+windows, which opened upon the street.  The walls were hung with wired
+cases, apparently containing books.  There was a table and two or three
+chairs; but the principal article of furniture was a long sofa, extending
+from the door by which we entered to the farther end of the apartment.
+Seating himself upon the sofa, my new acquaintance motioned to me to sit
+beside him, and then, looking me full in the face, repeated his former
+inquiry.  'In the name of all that is wonderful, how came you to know
+aught of my language?'
+
+'There is nothing wonderful in that,' said I; 'we are at the commencement
+of a philological age, every one studies languages; that is, every one
+who is fit for nothing else; philology being the last resource of dulness
+and ennui, I have got a little in advance of the throng, by mastering the
+Armenian alphabet; but I foresee the time when every unmarriageable miss,
+and desperate blockhead, will likewise have acquired the letters of
+Mesroub, and will know the term for bread, in Armenian, and perhaps that
+for wine.'
+
+'Kini,' said my companion; and that and the other word put me in mind of
+the duties of hospitality.  'Will you eat bread and drink wine with me?'
+
+'Willingly,' said I.  Whereupon my companion, unlocking a closet,
+produced, on a silver salver, a loaf of bread, with a silver-handled
+knife, and wine in a silver flask, with cups of the same metal.  ' I hope
+you like my fare,' said he, after we had both eaten and drunk.
+
+'I like your bread,' said I, 'for it is stale; I like not your wine, it
+is sweet, and I hate sweet wine.'
+
+'It is wine of Cyprus,' said my entertainer; and, when I found that it
+was wine of Cyprus, I tasted it again, and the second taste pleased me
+much better than the first, notwithstanding that I still thought it
+somewhat sweet.  'So,' said I, after a pause, looking at my companion,
+'you are an Armenian.'
+
+'Yes,' said he, 'an Armenian born in London, but not less an Armenian on
+that account.  My father was a native of Ispahan, one of the celebrated
+Armenian colony which was established there shortly after the time of the
+dreadful hunger, which drove the children of Haik in swarms from their
+original country, and scattered them over most parts of the eastern and
+western world.  In Ispahan he passed the greater portion of his life,
+following mercantile pursuits with considerable success.  Certain
+enemies, however, having accused him to the despot of the place, of using
+seditious language, he was compelled to flee, leaving most of his
+property behind.  Travelling in the direction of the west, he came at
+last to London, where he established himself, and where he eventually
+died, leaving behind a large property and myself, his only child, the
+fruit of a marriage with an Armenian Englishwoman, who did not survive my
+birth more than three months.'
+
+The Armenian then proceeded to tell me that he had carried on the
+business of his father, which seemed to embrace most matters, from buying
+silks of Lascars, to speculating in the funds, and that he had
+considerably increased the property which his father had left him.  He
+candidly confessed that he was wonderfully fond of gold, and said there
+was nothing like it for giving a person respectability and consideration
+in the world: to which assertion I made no answer, being not exactly
+prepared to contradict it.
+
+And, when he had related to me his history, he expressed a desire to know
+something more of myself, whereupon I gave him the outline of my history,
+concluding with saying, 'I am now a poor author, or rather philologist,
+upon the streets of London, possessed of many tongues, which I find of no
+use in the world.'
+
+'Learning without money is anything but desirable,' said the Armenian,
+'as it unfits a man for humble occupations.  It is true that it may
+occasionally beget him friends; I confess to you that your understanding
+something of my language weighs more with me than the service you
+rendered me in rescuing my pocket-book the other day from the claws of
+that scoundrel whom I yet hope to see hanged, if not crucified,
+notwithstanding there were in that pocket-book papers and documents of
+considerable value.  Yes, that circumstance makes my heart warm towards
+you, for I am proud of my language--as I indeed well may be--what a
+language, noble and energetic! quite original, differing from all others
+both in words and structure.'
+
+'You are mistaken,' said I; 'many languages resemble the Armenian both in
+structure and words.'
+
+'For example?' said the Armenian.
+
+'For example,' said I, 'the English.'
+
+'The English!' said the Armenian; 'show me one word in which the English
+resembles the Armenian.'
+
+'You walk on London Bridge,' said I.
+
+'Yes,' said the Armenian.
+
+'I saw you look over the balustrade the other morning.'
+
+'True,' said the Armenian.
+
+'Well, what did you see rushing up through the arches with noise and
+foam?'
+
+'What was it?' said the Armenian.  'What was it?--you don't mean the
+_tide_?'
+
+'Do I not?' said I.
+
+'Well, what has the tide to do with the matter?'
+
+'Much,' said I; 'what is the tide?'
+
+'The ebb and flow of the sea,' said the Armenian.
+
+'The sea itself; what is the Haik word for sea?'
+
+The Armenian gave a strong gasp; then, nodding his head thrice, 'You are
+right,' said he, 'the English word tide is the Armenian for sea; and now
+I begin to perceive that there are many English words which are Armenian;
+there is --- and ---; and there again in French, there is --- and ---
+derived from the Armenian.  How strange, how singular--I thank you.  It
+is a proud thing to see that the language of my race has had so much
+influence over the languages of the world.'
+
+I saw that all that related to his race was the weak point of the
+Armenian.  I did not flatter the Armenian with respect to his race or
+language.  'An inconsiderable people,' said I, 'shrewd and industrious,
+but still an inconsiderable people.  A language bold and expressive, and
+of some antiquity, derived, though perhaps not immediately, from some
+much older tongue.  I do not think that the Armenian has had any
+influence over the formation of the languages of the world, I am not much
+indebted to the Armenian for the solution of any doubts; whereas to the
+language of Mr. Petulengro--'
+
+'I have heard you mention that name before,' said the Armenian; 'who is
+Mr. Petulengro?'
+
+And then I told the Armenian who Mr. Petulengro was.  The Armenian spoke
+contemptuously of Mr. Petulengro and his race.  'Don't speak
+contemptuously of Mr. Petulengro,' said I, 'nor of anything belonging to
+him.  He is a dark mysterious personage; all connected with him is a
+mystery, especially his language; but I believe that his language is
+doomed to solve a great philological problem--Mr. Petulengo--'
+
+'You appear agitated,' said the Armenian; 'take another glass of wine;
+you possess a great deal of philological knowledge, but it appears to me
+that the language of this Petulengro is your foible: but let us change
+the subject; I feel much interested in you, and would fain be of service
+to you.  Can you cast accounts?'
+
+I shook my head.
+
+'Keep books?'
+
+'I have an idea that I could write books,' said I; 'but, as to keeping
+them--' and here again I shook my head.
+
+The Armenian was silent some time; all at once, glancing at one of the
+wire cases, with which, as I have already said, the walls of the room
+were hung, he asked me if I was well acquainted with the learning of the
+Haiks.  'The books in these cases,' said he, 'contain the masterpieces of
+Haik learning.'
+
+'No,' said I; 'all I know of the learning of the Haiks is their
+translation of the Bible.'
+
+'You have never read Z---?'
+
+'No,' said I, 'I have never read Z---.'
+
+'I have a plan,' said the Armenian; 'I think I can employ you agreeably
+and profitably; I should like to see Z--- in an English dress; you shall
+translate Z---.  If you can read the Scriptures in Armenian, you can
+translate Z---.  He is our Esop, the most acute and clever of all our
+moral writers--his philosophy--'
+
+'I will have nothing to do with him,' said I.
+
+'Wherefore?' said the Armenian.
+
+'There is an old proverb,' said I, '"that a burnt child avoids the fire."
+I have burnt my hands sufficiently with attempting to translate
+philosophy, to make me cautious of venturing upon it again'; and then I
+told the Armenian how I had been persuaded by the publisher to translate
+his philosophy into German, and what sorry thanks I had received; 'And
+who knows,' said I, 'but the attempt to translate Armenian philosophy
+into English might he attended with yet more disagreeable consequences?'
+
+The Armenian smiled.  'You would find me very different from the
+publisher.'
+
+'In many points I have no doubt I should,' I replied; 'but at the present
+moment I feel like a bird which has escaped from a cage, and, though
+hungry, feels no disposition to return.  Of what nation is the dark man
+below stairs, whom I saw writing at the desk?'
+
+'He is a Moldave,' said the Armenian; 'the dog (and here his eyes
+sparkled) deserves to be crucified, he is continually making mistakes.'
+
+The Armenian again renewed his proposition about Z---, which I again
+refused, as I felt but little inclination to place myself beneath the
+jurisdiction of a person who was in the habit of cuffing those whom he
+employed, when they made mistakes.  I presently took my departure; not,
+however, before I had received from the Armenian a pressing invitation to
+call upon him whenever I should feel disposed.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVIII
+
+
+What to do--Strong enough--Fame and profit--Alliterative
+euphony--Excellent fellow--Listen to me--A plan--Bagnigge Wells.
+
+Anxious thoughts frequently disturbed me at this time with respect to
+what I was to do, and how support myself in the Great City.  My future
+prospects were gloomy enough, and I looked forward and feared; sometimes
+I felt half disposed to accept the offer of the Armenian, and to commence
+forthwith, under his superintendence, the translation of the Haik Esop;
+but the remembrance of the cuffs which I had seen him bestow upon the
+Moldavian, when glancing over his shoulder into the ledger or whatever it
+was on which he was employed, immediately drove the inclination from my
+mind.  I could not support the idea of the possibility of his staring
+over my shoulder upon my translation of the Haik Esop, and, dissatisfied
+with my attempts, treating me as he had treated the Moldavian clerk;
+placing myself in a position which exposed me to such treatment would
+indeed be plunging into the fire after escaping from the frying-pan.  The
+publisher, insolent and overbearing as he was, whatever he might have
+wished or thought, had never lifted his hand against me, or told me that
+I merited crucifixion.
+
+What was I to do? turn porter?  I was strong; but there was something
+besides strength required to ply the trade of a porter--a mind of a
+particularly phlegmatic temperament, which I did not possess.  What
+should I do? enlist as a soldier? I was tall enough; but something
+besides height is required to make a man play with credit the part of
+soldier, I mean a private one--a spirit, if spirit it can be called,
+which will not only enable a man to submit with patience to insolence and
+abuse, and even to cuffs and kicks, but occasionally to the lash.  I felt
+that I was not qualified to be a soldier, at least a private one; far
+better be a drudge to the most ferocious of publishers, editing Newgate
+lives, and writing in eighteenpenny reviews--better to translate the Haik
+Esop, under the superintendence of ten Armenians, than be a private
+soldier in the English service; I did not decide rashly--I knew something
+of soldiering.  What should I do?  I thought that I would make a last and
+desperate attempt to dispose of the ballads and of Ab Gwilym.
+
+I had still an idea that, provided I could persuade any spirited
+publisher to give these translations to the world, I should acquire both
+considerable fame and profit; not, perhaps, a world-embracing fame such
+as Byron's; but a fame not to be sneered at, which would last me a
+considerable time, and would keep my heart from breaking;--profit, not
+equal to that which Scott had made by his wondrous novels, but which
+would prevent me from starving, and enable me to achieve some other
+literary enterprise.  I read and re-read my ballads, and the more I read
+them the more I was convinced that the public, in the event of their
+being published, would freely purchase, and hail them with the merited
+applause.  Were not the deeds and adventures wonderful and
+heart-stirring--from which it is true I could claim no merit, being but
+the translator; but had I not rendered them into English, with all their
+original fire?  Yes, I was confident I had; and I had no doubt that the
+public would say so.  And then, with respect to Ab Gwilym, had I not done
+as much justice to him as to the Danish ballads; not only rendering
+faithfully his thoughts, imagery, and phraseology, but even preserving in
+my translation the alliterative euphony which constitutes one of the most
+remarkable features of Welsh prosody?  Yes, I had accomplished all this;
+and I doubted not that the public would receive my translations from Ab
+Gwilym with quite as much eagerness as my version of the Danish ballads.
+But I found the publishers as intractable as ever, and to this day the
+public has never had an opportunity of doing justice to the glowing fire
+of my ballad versification, and the alliterative euphony of my imitations
+of Ab Gwilym.
+
+I had not seen Francis Ardry since the day I had seen him taking lessons
+in elocution.  One afternoon as I was seated at my table, my head resting
+on my hands, he entered my apartment; sitting down, he inquired of me why
+I had not been to see him.
+
+'I might ask the same question of you,' I replied.  'Wherefore have you
+not been to see me?'  Whereupon Francis Ardry told me that he had been
+much engaged in his oratorical exercises, also in escorting the young
+Frenchwoman about to places of public amusement; he then again questioned
+me as to the reason of my not having been to see him.
+
+I returned an evasive answer.  The truth was, that for some time past my
+appearance, owing to the state of my finances, had been rather shabby;
+and I did not wish to expose a fashionable young man like Francis Ardry,
+who lived in a fashionable neighbourhood, to the imputation of having a
+shabby acquaintance.  I was aware that Francis Ardry was an excellent
+fellow; but, on that very account, I felt, under existing circumstances,
+a delicacy in visiting him.
+
+It is very possible that he had an inkling of how matters stood, as he
+presently began to talk of my affairs and prospects.  I told him of my
+late ill success with the booksellers, and inveighed against their
+blindness to their own interest in refusing to publish my translations.
+'The last that I addressed myself to,' said I, 'told me not to trouble
+him again unless I could bring him a decent novel or a tale.'
+
+'Well,' said Frank, 'and why did you not carry him a decent novel or a
+tale?'
+
+'Because I have neither,' said I; 'and to write them is, I believe, above
+my capacity.  At present I feel divested of all energy--heartless, and
+almost hopeless.'
+
+'I see how it is,' said Francis Ardry, 'you have overworked yourself,
+and, worst of all, to no purpose.  Take my advice; cast all care aside,
+and only think of diverting yourself for a month at least.'
+
+'Divert myself!' said I; 'and where am I to find the means?'
+
+'Be that care on my shoulders,' said Francis Ardry.  'Listen to me--my
+uncles have been so delighted with the favourable accounts which they
+have lately received from T--- of my progress in oratory, that, in the
+warmth of their hearts, they made me a present yesterday of two hundred
+pounds.  This is more money than I want, at least for the present; do me
+the favour to take half of it as a loan--hear me,' said he, observing
+that I was about to interrupt him; 'I have a plan in my head--one of the
+prettiest in the world.  The sister of my charmer is just arrived from
+France; she cannot speak a word of English; and, as Annette and myself
+are much engaged in our own matters, we cannot pay her the attention
+which we should wish, and which she deserves, for she is a truly
+fascinating creature, although somewhat differing from my charmer, having
+blue eyes and flaxen hair; whilst, Annette, on the contrary--But I hope
+you will shortly see Annette.  Now, my plan is this--Take the money,
+dress yourself fashionably, and conduct Annette's sister to Bagnigge
+Wells.'
+
+'And what should we do at Bagnigge Wells?'
+
+'Do!' said Francis Ardry.  'Dance!'
+
+'But,' said I, 'I scarcely know anything of dancing.'
+
+'Then here's an excellent opportunity of improving yourself.  Like most
+Frenchwomen, she dances divinely; however, if you object to Bagnigge
+Wells and dancing, go to Brighton, and remain there a month or two, at
+the end of which time you can return with your mind refreshed and
+invigorated, and materials, perhaps, for a tale or novel.'
+
+'I never heard a more foolish, plan,' said I, 'or one less likely to
+terminate profitably or satisfactorily.  I thank you, however, for your
+offer, which is, I daresay, well meant.  If I am to escape from my cares
+and troubles, and find my mind refreshed and invigorated, I must adopt
+other means than conducting a French demoiselle to Brighton or Bagnigge
+Wells, defraying the expense by borrowing from a friend.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIX
+
+
+Singular personage--A large sum--Papa of Rome--We are
+Christians--Degenerate Armenians--Roots of Ararat--Regular features.
+
+The Armenian!  I frequently saw this individual, availing myself of the
+permission which he had given me to call upon him.  A truly singular
+personage was he, with his love of amassing money, and his nationality so
+strong as to be akin to poetry.  Many an Armenian I have subsequently
+known fond of money-getting, and not destitute of national spirit; but
+never another, who, in the midst of his schemes of lucre, was at all
+times willing to enter into a conversation on the structure of the Haik
+language, or who ever offered me money to render into English the fables
+of Z--- in the hope of astonishing the stock-jobbers of the Exchange with
+the wisdom of the Haik Esop.
+
+But he was fond of money, very fond.  Within a little time I had won his
+confidence to such a degree that he informed me that the grand wish of
+his heart was to be possessed of two hundred thousand pounds.
+
+'I think you might satisfy yourself with the half,' said I.  'One hundred
+thousand pounds is a large sum.'
+
+'You are mistaken,' said the Armenian, 'a hundred thousand pounds is
+nothing.  My father left me that or more at his death.  No, I shall never
+be satisfied with less than two.'
+
+'And what will you do with your riches,' said I, 'when you have obtained
+them?  Will you sit down and muse upon them, or will you deposit them in
+a cellar, and go down once a day to stare at them?  I have heard say that
+the fulfilment of one's wishes is invariably the precursor of extreme
+misery, and forsooth I can scarcely conceive a more horrible state of
+existence than to be without a hope or wish.'
+
+'It is bad enough, I daresay,' said the Armenian; 'it will, however, be
+time enough to think of disposing of the money when I have procured it.  I
+still fall short by a vast sum of the two hundred thousand pounds.'
+
+I had occasionally much conversation with him on the state and prospects
+of his nation, especially of that part of it which still continued in the
+original country of the Haiks--Ararat and its confines, which, it
+appeared, he had frequently visited.  He informed me that since the death
+of the last Haik monarch, which occurred in the eleventh century, Armenia
+had been governed both temporally and spiritually by certain personages
+called patriarchs; their temporal authority, however, was much
+circumscribed by the Persian and Turk, especially the former, of whom the
+Armenian spoke with much hatred, whilst their spiritual authority had at
+various times been considerably undermined by the emissaries of the Papa
+of Rome, as the Armenian called him.
+
+'The Papa of Rome sent his emissaries at an early period amongst us,'
+said the Armenian, 'seducing the minds of weak-headed people, persuading
+them that the hillocks of Rome are higher than the ridges of Ararat; that
+the Roman Papa has more to say in heaven than the Armenian patriarch, and
+that puny Latin is a better language than nervous and sonorous Haik.'
+
+'They are both dialects,' said I, 'of the language of Mr. Petulengro, one
+of whose race I believe to have been the original founder of Rome; but,
+with respect to religion, what are the chief points of your faith? you
+are Christians, I believe.'
+
+'Yes,' said the Armenian, 'we are Christians in our way; we believe in
+God, the Holy Spirit, and Saviour, though we are not prepared to admit
+that the last personage is not only himself, but the other two.  We
+believe . . .' and then the Armenian told me of several things which the
+Haiks believed or disbelieved.  'But what we find most hard of all to
+believe,' said he, 'is that the man of the mole-hills is entitled to our
+allegiance, he not being a Haik, or understanding the Haik language.'
+
+'But, by your own confession,' said I, 'he has introduced a schism in
+your nation, and has amongst you many that believe in him.'
+
+'It is true,' said the Armenian, I that even on the confines of Ararat
+there are a great number who consider that mountain to be lower than the
+hillocks of Rome; but the greater number of degenerate Armenians are to
+be found amongst those who have wandered to the west; most of the Haik
+churches of the west consider Rome to be higher than Ararat--most of the
+Armenians of this place hold that dogma; I, however, have always stood
+firm in the contrary opinion.
+
+'Ha! ha!'--here the Armenian laughed in his peculiar manner--'talking of
+this matter puts me in mind of an adventure which lately befell me, with
+one of the emissaries of the Papa of Rome, for the Papa of Rome has at
+present many emissaries in this country, in order to seduce the people
+from their own quiet religion to the savage heresy of Rome; this fellow
+came to me partly in the hope of converting me, but principally to extort
+money for the purpose of furthering the designs of Rome in this country.
+I humoured the fellow at first, keeping him in play for nearly a month,
+deceiving and laughing at him.  At last he discovered that he could make
+nothing of me, and departed with the scowl of Caiaphas, whilst I cried
+after him, 'The roots of Ararat are _deeper_ than those of Rome.'
+
+The Armenian had occasionally reverted to the subject of the translation
+of the Haik Esop, which he had still a lurking desire that I should
+execute; but I had invariably declined the undertaking, without, however,
+stating my reasons.  On one occasion, when we had been conversing on the
+subject, the Armenian, who had been observing my countenance for some
+time with much attention, remarked, 'Perhaps, after all, you are right,
+and you might employ your time to better advantage.  Literature is a fine
+thing, especially Haik literature, but neither that nor any other would
+be likely to serve as a foundation to a man's fortune: and to make a
+fortune should be the principal aim of every one's life; therefore listen
+to me.  Accept a seat at the desk opposite to my Moldavian clerk, and
+receive the rudiments of a merchant's education.  You shall be instructed
+in the Armenian way of doing business--I think you would make an
+excellent merchant.'
+
+'Why do you think so?'
+
+'Because you have something of the Armenian look.'
+
+'I understand you,' said I; 'you mean to say that I squint!'
+
+'Not exactly,' said the Armenian, 'but there is certainly a kind of
+irregularity in your features.  One eye appears to me larger than the
+other--never mind, but rather rejoice; in that irregularity consists your
+strength.  All people with regular features are fools; it is very hard
+for them, you'll say, but there is no help: all we can do, who are not in
+such a predicament, is to pity those who are.  Well! will you accept my
+offer?  No! you are a singular individual; but I must not forget my own
+concerns.  I must now go forth, having an appointment by which I hope to
+make money.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER L
+
+
+Wish fulfilled--Extraordinary figure--Bueno--Noah--The two faces--I don't
+blame him--Too fond of money--Were I an Armenian.
+
+The fulfilment of the Armenian's grand wish was nearer at hand than
+either he or I had anticipated.  Partly owing to the success of a bold
+speculation, in which he had some time previously engaged, and partly
+owing to the bequest of a large sum of money by one of his nation who
+died at this period in Paris, he found himself in the possession of a
+fortune somewhat exceeding two hundred thousand pounds; this fact he
+communicated to me one evening about an hour after the close of 'Change;
+the hour at which I generally called, and at which I mostly found him at
+home.
+
+'Well,' said I, 'and what do you intend to do next?'
+
+'I scarcely know,' said the Armenian.  'I was thinking of that when you
+came in.  I don't see anything that I can do, save going on in my former
+course.  After all, I was perhaps too moderate in making the possession
+of two hundred thousand pounds the summit of my ambition; there are many
+individuals in this town who possess three times that sum, and are not
+yet satisfied.  No, I think I can do no better than pursue the old
+career; who knows but I may make the two hundred thousand three or
+four?--there is already a surplus, which is an encouragement; however, we
+will consider the matter over a goblet of wine; I have observed of late
+that you have become partial to my Cyprus.'
+
+And it came to pass that, as we were seated over the Cyprus wine, we
+heard a knock at the door.  'Adelante!' cried the Armenian; whereupon the
+door opened, and in walked a somewhat extraordinary figure--a man in a
+long loose tunic of a stuff striped with black and yellow; breeches of
+plush velvet, silk stockings, and shoes with silver buckles.  On his head
+he wore a high-peaked hat; he was tall, had a hooked nose, and in age was
+about fifty.
+
+'Welcome, Rabbi Manasseh,' said the Armenian.  'I know your knock--you
+are welcome; sit down.'
+
+'I am welcome,' said Manasseh, sitting down; 'he--he--he! you know my
+knock--I bring you money--_bueno_!'
+
+There was something very peculiar in the sound of that bueno--I never
+forgot it.
+
+Thereupon a conversation ensued between Rabbi Manasseh and the Armenian,
+in a language which I knew to be Spanish, though a peculiar dialect.  It
+related to a mercantile transaction.  The Rabbi sighed heavily as he
+delivered to the other a considerable sum of money.
+
+'It is right,' said the Armenian, handing a receipt.  'It is right; and I
+am quite satisfied.'
+
+'You are satisfied--you have taken money.  _Bueno_, I have nothing to say
+against your being satisfied.'
+
+'Come, Rabbi,' said the Armenian, 'do not despond; it may be your turn
+next to take money; in the meantime, can't you be persuaded to taste my
+Cyprus?'
+
+'He--he--he! senor, you know I do not love wine.  I love Noah when he is
+himself; but, as Janus, I love him not.  But you are merry; _bueno_, you
+have a right to be so.'
+
+'Excuse me,' said I; 'but does Noah ever appear as Janus?'
+
+'He--he--he!' said the Rabbi, 'he only appeared as Janus once--una vez
+quando estuvo borracho; which means--'
+
+'I understand,' said I; 'when he was . . .' and I drew the side of my
+right hand sharply across my left wrist.
+
+'Are you one of our people?' said the Rabbi.
+
+'No,' said I, 'I am one of the Goyim; but I am only half enlightened.  Why
+should Noah be Janus when he was in that state?'
+
+'He--he--he! you must know that in Lasan akhades wine is janin.'
+
+'In Armenian, kini,' said I; 'in Welsh, gwin; Latin, vinum; but do you
+think that Janus and janin are one?'
+
+'Do I think?  Don't the commentators say so?  Does not Master Leo
+Abarbenel say so in his _Dialogues of Divine Love_'?
+
+'But,' said I, 'I always thought that Janus was a god of the ancient
+Romans, who stood in a temple open in time of war, and shut in time of
+peace; he was represented with two faces, which--which--'
+
+'He--he--he!' said the Rabbi, rising from his seat; 'he had two faces,
+had he?  And what did those two faces typify?  You do not know; no, nor
+did the Romans who carved him with two faces know why they did so; for
+they were only half enlightened, like you and the rest of the Goyim.  Yet
+they were right in carving him with two faces looking from each
+other--they were right, though they knew not why; there was a tradition
+among them that the Janinoso had two faces, but they knew not that one
+was for the world which was gone and the other for the world before
+him--for the drowned world and for the present, as Master Leo Abarbenel
+says in his _Dialogues of Divine Love_.  He--he--he!' continued the
+Rabbi, who had by this time advanced to the door, and, turning round,
+waved the two forefingers of his right hand in our faces; 'the Goyims and
+Epicouraiyim are clever men, they know how to make money better than we
+of Israel.  My good friend there is a clever man, I bring him money, he
+never brought me any; _bueno_, I do not blame him, he knows much, very
+much; but one thing there is my friend does not know, nor any of the
+Epicureans, he does not know the sacred thing--he has never received the
+gift of interpretation which God alone gives to the seed--he has his
+gift, I have mine--he is satisfied, I don't blame him, _bueno_.'
+
+And, with this last word in his mouth, he departed.
+
+'Is that man a native of Spain?' I demanded.
+
+'Not a native of Spain,' said the Armenian, 'though he is one of those
+who call themselves Spanish Jews, and who are to be found scattered
+throughout Europe, speaking the Spanish language transmitted to them by
+their ancestors, who were expelled from Spain in the time of Ferdinand
+and Isabella.'
+
+'The Jews are a singular people,' said I.
+
+'A race of cowards and dastards,' said the Armenian, 'without a home or
+country; servants to servants; persecuted and despised by all.'
+
+'And what are the Haiks?' I demanded.
+
+'Very different from the Jews,' replied the Armenian; 'the Haiks have a
+home--a country, and can occasionally use a good sword; though it is true
+they are not what they might be.'
+
+'Then it is a shame that they do not become so,' said I; 'but they are
+too fond of money.  There is yourself, with two hundred thousand pounds
+in your pocket, craving for more, whilst you might be turning your wealth
+to the service of your country.'
+
+'In what manner?' said the Armenian.
+
+'I have heard you say that the grand oppressor of your country is the
+Persian; why not attempt to free your country from his oppression--you
+have two hundred thousand pounds, and money is the sinew of war?'
+
+'Would you, then, have me attack the Persian?'
+
+'I scarcely know what to say; fighting is a rough trade, and I am by no
+means certain that you are calculated for the scratch.  It is not every
+one who has been brought up in the school of Mr. Petulengro and Tawno
+Chikno.  All I can say is, that if I were an Armenian, and had two
+hundred thousand pounds to back me, I would attack the Persian.'
+
+'Hem!' said the Armenian.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LI
+
+
+The one half-crown--Merit in patience--Cementer of friendship--Dreadful
+perplexity--The usual guttural--Armenian letters--Much indebted to
+you--Pure helplessness--Dumb people.
+
+One morning on getting up I discovered that my whole worldly wealth was
+reduced to one half-crown--throughout that day I walked about in
+considerable distress of mind; it was now requisite that I should come to
+a speedy decision with respect to what I was to do; I had not many
+alternatives, and, before I had retired to rest on the night of the day
+in question, I had determined that I could do no better than accept the
+first proposal of the Armenian, and translate under his superintendence
+the Haik Esop into English.
+
+I reflected, for I made a virtue of necessity, that, after all, such an
+employment would be an honest and honourable one; honest, inasmuch as by
+engaging in it I should do harm to nobody; honourable, inasmuch as it was
+a literary task, which not every one was capable of executing. it was not
+every one of the booksellers' writers of London who was competent to
+translate the Haik Esop.  I determined to accept the offer of the
+Armenian.
+
+Once or twice the thought of what I might have to undergo in the
+translation from certain peculiarities of the Armenian's temper almost
+unsettled me; but a mechanical diving of my hand into my pocket, and the
+feeling of the solitary half-crown, confirmed me; after all, this was a
+life of trial and tribulation, and I had read somewhere or other that
+there was much merit in patience, so I determined to hold fast in my
+resolution of accepting the offer of the Armenian.
+
+But all of a sudden I remembered that the Armenian appeared to have
+altered his intentions towards me: he appeared no longer desirous that I
+should render the Haik Esop into English for the benefit of the stock-
+jobbers on Exchange, but rather that I should acquire the rudiments of
+doing business in the Armenian fashion, and accumulate a fortune, which
+would enable me to make a figure upon 'Change with the best of the stock-
+jobbers.  'Well,' thought I, withdrawing my hand from my pocket, whither
+it had again mechanically dived, 'after all, what would the world, what
+would this city, be without commerce?  I believe the world, and
+particularly this city, would cut a very poor figure without commerce;
+and then there is something poetical in the idea of doing business after
+the Armenian fashion, dealing with dark-faced Lascars and Rabbins of the
+Sephardim.  Yes, should the Armenian insist upon it, I will accept a seat
+at the desk, opposite the Moldavian clerk.  I do not like the idea of
+cuffs similar to those the Armenian bestowed upon the Moldavian clerk;
+whatever merit there may be in patience, I do not think that my
+estimation of the merit of patience would be sufficient to induce me to
+remain quietly sitting under the infliction of cuffs.  I think I should,
+in the event of his cuffing me, knock the Armenian down.  Well, I think I
+have heard it said somewhere, that a knock-down blow is a great cementer
+of friendship; I think I have heard of two people being better friends
+than ever after the one had received from the other a knock-down blow.'
+
+That night I dreamed I had acquired a colossal fortune, some four hundred
+thousand pounds, by the Armenian way of doing business, but suddenly
+awoke in dreadful perplexity as to how I should dispose of it.
+
+About nine o'clock next morning I set off to the house of the Armenian; I
+had never called upon him so early before, and certainly never with a
+heart beating with so much eagerness; but the situation of my affairs had
+become very critical, and I thought that I ought to lose no time in
+informing the Armenian that I was at length perfectly willing either to
+translate the Haik Esop under his superintendence, or to accept a seat at
+the desk opposite to the Moldavian clerk, and acquire the secrets of
+Armenian commerce.  With a quick step I entered the counting-room, where,
+notwithstanding the earliness of the hour, I found the clerk, busied as
+usual at his desk.
+
+He had always appeared to me a singular being, this same Moldavian clerk.
+A person of fewer words could scarcely be conceived: provided his master
+were at home, he would, on my inquiring, nod his head; and, provided he
+were not, he would invariably reply with the monosyllable No, delivered
+in a strange guttural tone.  On the present occasion, being full of
+eagerness and impatience, I was about to pass by him to the apartment
+above, without my usual inquiry, when he lifted his head from the ledger
+in which he was writing, and, laying down his pen, motioned to me with
+his forefinger, as if to arrest my progress; whereupon I stopped, and,
+with a palpitating heart, demanded whether the master of the house was at
+home.  The Moldavian clerk replied with his usual guttural, and, opening
+his desk, ensconced his head therein.
+
+'It does not much matter,' said I; 'I suppose I shall find him at home
+after 'Change; it does not much matter, I can return.'
+
+I was turning away with the intention of leaving the room; at this
+moment, however, the head of the Moldavian clerk became visible, and I
+observed a letter in his hand, which he had inserted in the desk at the
+same time with his head; this he extended towards me, making at the same
+time a sidelong motion with his head, as much as to say that it contained
+something which interested me.
+
+I took the letter, and the Moldavian clerk forthwith resumed his
+occupation.  The back of the letter bore my name, written in Armenian
+characters; with a trembling hand I broke the seal, and, unfolding the
+letter, I beheld several lines also written in the letters of Mesroub,
+the Cadmus of the Armenians.
+
+I stared at the lines, and at first could not make out a syllable of
+their meaning; at last, however, by continued staring, I discovered that,
+though the letters were Armenian, the words were English; in about ten
+minutes I had contrived to decipher the sense of the letter; it ran
+somewhat in this style:--
+
+   'MY DEAR FRIEND--The words which you uttered in our last conversation
+   have made a profound impression upon me; I have thought them over day
+   and night, and have come to the conclusion that it is my bounden duty
+   to attack the Persians.  When these lines are delivered to you, I
+   shall be on the route to Ararat.  A mercantile speculation will be to
+   the world the ostensible motive of my journey, and it is singular
+   enough that one which offers considerable prospect of advantage has
+   just presented itself on the confines of Persia.  Think not, however,
+   that motives of lucre would have been sufficiently powerful to tempt
+   me to the East at the present moment.  I may speculate, it is true,
+   but I should scarcely have undertaken the journey but for your pungent
+   words inciting me to attack the Persians.  Doubt not that I will
+   attack them on the first opportunity.  I thank you heartily for
+   putting me in mind of my duty.  I have hitherto, to use your own
+   words, been too fond of money-getting, like all my countrymen.  I am
+   much indebted to you; farewell! and may every prosperity await you.'
+
+For some time after I had deciphered the epistle, I stood as if rooted to
+the floor.  I felt stunned--my last hope was gone; presently a feeling
+arose in my mind--a feeling of self-reproach.  Whom had I to blame but
+myself for the departure of the Armenian?  Would he have ever thought of
+attacking the Persians had I not put the idea into his head? he had told
+me in his epistle that he was indebted to me for the idea.  But for that,
+he might at the present moment have been in London, increasing his
+fortune by his usual methods, and I might be commencing under his
+auspices the translation of the Haik Esop, with the promise, no doubt, of
+a considerable remuneration for my trouble; or I might be taking a seat
+opposite the Moldavian clerk, and imbibing the first rudiments of doing
+business after the Armenian fashion, with the comfortable hope of
+realising, in a short time, a fortune of three or four hundred thousand
+pounds; but the Armenian was now gone, and farewell to the fine hopes I
+had founded upon him the day before.  What was I to do?  I looked wildly
+around, till my eyes rested on the Moldavian clerk, who was writing away
+in his ledger with particular vehemence.  Not knowing well what to do or
+to say, I thought I might as well ask the Moldavian clerk when the
+Armenian had departed, and when he thought that he would return.  It is
+true it mattered little to me when he departed, seeing that he was gone,
+and it was evident that he would not be back soon; but I knew not what to
+do, and in pure helplessness thought I might as well ask; so I went up to
+the Moldavian clerk, and asked him when the Armenian had departed, and
+whether he had been gone two days or three.  Whereupon the Moldavian
+clerk, looking up from his ledger, made certain signs, which I could by
+no means understand.  I stood astonished, but, presently recovering
+myself, inquired when he considered it probable that the master would
+return, and whether he thought it would be two months or--my tongue
+faltered--two years; whereupon the Moldavian clerk made more signs than
+before, and yet more unintelligible; as I persisted, however, he flung
+down his pen, and, putting his thumb into his mouth, moved it rapidly,
+causing the nail to sound against the lower jaw; whereupon I saw that he
+was dumb, and hurried away, for I had always entertained a horror of dumb
+people, having once heard my another say, when I was a child, that dumb
+people were half demoniacs, or little better.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LII
+
+
+Kind of stupor--Peace of God--Divine hand--Farewell, child--The
+fair--Massive edifice--Battered tars--Lost! lost!--Good-day, gentlemen.
+
+Leaving the house of the Armenian, I strolled about for some time; almost
+mechanically my feet conducted me to London Bridge, to the booth in which
+stood the stall of the old apple-woman; the sound of her voice aroused
+me, as I sat in a kind of stupor on the stone bench beside her; she was
+inquiring what was the matter with me.
+
+At first, I believe, I answered her very incoherently, for I observed
+alarm beginning to depict itself upon her countenance.  Rousing myself,
+however, I in my turn put a few questions to her upon her present
+condition and prospects.  The old woman's countenance cleared up
+instantly; she informed me that she had never been more comfortable in
+her life; that her trade, her _honest_ trade--laying an emphasis on the
+word honest--had increased of late wonderfully; that her health was
+better, and, above all, that she felt no fear and horror 'here,' laying
+her hand on her breast.
+
+On my asking her whether she still heard voices in the night, she told me
+that she frequently did; but that the present were mild voices, sweet
+voices, encouraging voices, very different from the former ones; that a
+voice, only the night previous, had cried out about 'the peace of God,'
+in particularly sweet accents; a sentence which she remembered to have
+read in her early youth in the primer, but which she had clean forgotten
+till the voice the night before brought it to her recollection.
+
+After a pause, the old woman said to me, 'I believe, dear, that it is the
+blessed book you brought me which has wrought this goodly change.  How
+glad I am now that I can read; but oh what a difference between the book
+you brought to me and the one you took away!  I believe the one you
+brought is written by the finger of God, and the other by--'
+
+'Don't abuse the book,' said I, 'it is an excellent book for those who
+can understand it; it was not exactly suited to you, and perhaps it had
+been better that you had never read it--and yet, who knows?  Peradventure,
+if you had not read that book, you would not have been fitted for the
+perusal of the one which you say is written by the finger of God'; and,
+pressing my hand to my head, I fell into a deep fit of musing.  'What,
+after all,' thought I, 'if there should be more order and system in the
+working of the moral world than I have thought?  Does there not seem in
+the present instance to be something like the working of a Divine hand?  I
+could not conceive why this woman, better educated than her mother,
+should have been, as she certainly was, a worse character than her
+mother.  Yet perhaps this woman may be better and happier than her mother
+ever was; perhaps she is so already--perhaps this world is not a wild,
+lying dream, as I have occasionally supposed it to be.'
+
+But the thought of my own situation did not permit me to abandon myself
+much longer to these musings.  I started up.  'Where are you going,
+child?' said the woman, anxiously.  'I scarcely know,' said I;
+'anywhere.'  'Then stay here, child,' said she; 'I have much to say to
+you.'  'No,' said I, 'I shall be better moving about'; and I was moving
+away, when it suddenly occurred to me that I might never see this woman
+again; and turning round I offered her my hand, and bade her good-bye.
+'Farewell, child,' said the old woman, 'and God bless you!'  I then moved
+along the bridge until I reached the Southwark side, and, still holding
+on my course, my mind again became quickly abstracted from all
+surrounding objects.
+
+At length I found myself in a street or road, with terraces on either
+side, and seemingly of interminable length, leading, as it would appear,
+to the south-east.  I was walking at a great rate--there were likewise a
+great number of people, also walking at a great rate; also carts and
+carriages driving at a great rate; and all--men, carts, and
+carriages--going in the selfsame direction, namely to the south-east.  I
+stopped for a moment and deliberated whether or not I should proceed.
+What business had I in that direction?  I could not say that I had any
+particular business in that direction, but what could I do were I to turn
+back? only walk about well-known streets; and, if I must walk, why not
+continue in the direction in which I was to see whither the road and its
+terraces led?  I was here in a _terra incognita_, and an unknown place had
+always some interest for me; moreover, I had a desire to know whither all
+this crowd was going, and for what purpose.  I thought they could not be
+going far, as crowds seldom go far, especially at such a rate; so I
+walked on more lustily than before, passing group after group of the
+crowd, and almost vying in speed with some of the carriages, especially
+the hackney-coaches; and, by dint of walking at this rate, the terraces
+and houses becoming somewhat less frequent as I advanced, I reached in
+about three-quarters of an hour a kind of low dingy town, in the
+neighbourhood of the river; the streets were swarming with people, and I
+concluded, from the number of wild-beast shows, caravans, gingerbread
+stalls, and the like, that a fair was being held.  Now, as I had always
+been partial to fairs, I felt glad that I had fallen in with the crowd
+which had conducted me to the present one, and, casting away as much as I
+was able all gloomy thoughts, I did my best to enter into the diversions
+of the fair; staring at the wonderful representations of animals on
+canvas hung up before the shows of wild beasts, which, by the bye, are
+frequently found much more worthy of admiration than the real beasts
+themselves; listening to the jokes of the merry-andrews from the
+platforms in front of the temporary theatres, or admiring the splendid
+tinsel dresses of the performers who thronged the stages in the intervals
+of the entertainments; and in this manner, occasionally gazing and
+occasionally listening, I passed through the town till I came in front of
+a large edifice looking full upon the majestic bosom of the Thames.
+
+It was a massive stone edifice, built in an antique style, and black with
+age, with a broad esplanade between it and the river, on which, mixed
+with a few people from the fair, I observed moving about a great many
+individuals in quaint dresses of blue, with strange three-cornered hats
+on their heads; most of them were mutilated; this had a wooden leg--this
+wanted an arm; some had but one eye; and as I gazed upon the edifice, and
+the singular-looking individuals who moved before it, I guessed where I
+was.  'I am at ----' said I; 'these individuals are battered tars of Old
+England, and this edifice, once the favourite abode of Glorious
+Elizabeth, is the refuge which a grateful country has allotted to them.
+Here they can rest their weary bodies; at their ease talk over the
+actions in which they have been injured; and, with the tear of enthusiasm
+flowing from their eyes, boast how they have trod the deck of fame with
+Rodney, or Nelson, or others whose names stand emblazoned in the naval
+annals of their country.'
+
+Turning to the right, I entered a park or wood consisting of enormous
+trees, occupying the foot, sides, and top of a hill which rose behind the
+town; there were multitudes of people among the trees, diverting
+themselves in various ways.  Coming to the top of the hill, I was
+presently stopped by a lofty wall, along which I walked, till, coming to
+a small gate, I passed through, and found myself on an extensive green
+plain, on one side bounded in part by the wall of the park, and on the
+others, in the distance, by extensive ranges of houses; to the south-east
+was a lofty eminence, partially clothed with wood.  The plain exhibited
+an animated scene, a kind of continuation of the fair below; there were
+multitudes of people upon it, many tents, and shows; there was also horse-
+racing, and much noise and shouting, the sun shining brightly overhead.
+After gazing at the horse-racing for a little time, feeling myself
+somewhat tired, I went up to one of the tents, and laid myself down on
+the grass.  There was much noise in the tent.  'Who will stand me?' said
+a voice with a slight tendency to lisp.  'Will you, my lord?'  'Yes,'
+said another voice.  Then there was a sound as of a piece of money
+banging on a table.  'Lost! lost! lost!' cried several voices; and then
+the banging down of the money, and the 'lost! lost! lost!' were
+frequently repeated; at last the second voice exclaimed, 'I will try no
+more; you have cheated me.'  'Never cheated any one in my life, my
+lord--all fair--all chance.  Them that finds, wins--them that can't
+finds, loses.  Anyone else try?  Who'll try?  Will you, my lord?' and
+then it appeared that some other lord tried, for I heard more money flung
+down.  Then again the cry of 'lost! lost!'--then again the sound of
+money, and so on.  Once or twice, but not more, I heard 'Won! won!' but
+the predominant cry was 'Lost! lost!'  At last there was a considerable
+hubbub, and the words 'Cheat!' 'Rogue!' and 'You filched away the pea!'
+were used freely by more voices than one, to which the voice with the
+tendency to lisp replied, 'Never filched a pea in my life; would scorn
+it.  Always glad when folks wins; but, as those here don't appear to be
+civil, not to wish to play any more, I shall take myself off with my
+table; so, good-day, gentlemen.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIII
+
+
+Singular table--No money--Out of employ--My bonnet--We of the
+thimble--Good wages--Wisely resolved--Strangest way in the world--Fat
+gentleman--Not such another--First edition--Not very easy--Won't
+close--Avella gorgio--Alarmed look.
+
+Presently a man emerged from the tent, bearing before him a rather
+singular table; it appeared to be of white deal, was exceedingly small at
+the top, and with very long legs.  At a few yards from the entrance he
+paused, and looked round, as if to decide on the direction which he
+should take; presently, his eye glancing on me as I lay upon the ground,
+he started, and appeared for a moment inclined to make off as quick as
+possible, table and all.  In a moment, however, he seemed to recover
+assurance, and, coming up to the place where I was, the long legs of the
+table projecting before him, he cried, 'Glad to see you here, my lord.'
+
+'Thank you,' said I, 'it's a fine day.'
+
+'Very fine, my lord; will your lordship play?  Them that finds, wins--them
+that don't finds, loses.'
+
+'Play at what?' said I.
+
+'Only at the thimble and pea, my lord.'
+
+'I never heard of such a game.'
+
+'Didn't you?  Well, I'll soon teach you,' said he, placing the table
+down.  'All you have to do is to put a sovereign down on my table, and to
+find the pea, which I put under one of my thimbles.  If you find it,--and
+it is easy enough to find it,--I give you a sovereign besides your own:
+for them that finds, wins.'
+
+'And them that don't finds, loses,' said I; 'no, I don't wish to play.'
+
+'Why not, my lord?'
+
+'Why, in the first place, I have no money.'
+
+'Oh, you have no money, that of course alters the case.  If you have no
+money, you can't play.  Well, I suppose I must be seeing after my
+customers,' said he, glancing over the plain.
+
+'Good-day,' said I.
+
+'Good-day,' said the man slowly, but without moving, and as if in
+reflection.  After a moment or two, looking at me inquiringly, he added,
+'Out of employ?'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'out of employ.'
+
+The man measured me with his eye as I lay on the ground.  At length he
+said, 'May I speak a word or two to you, my lord?'
+
+'As many as you please,' said I.
+
+'Then just come a little out of hearing, a little farther on the grass,
+if you please, my lord.'
+
+'Why do you call me my lord?' said I, as I arose and followed him.
+
+'We of the thimble always calls our customers lords,' said the man; 'but
+I won't call you such a foolish name any more; come along.'
+
+The man walked along the plain till he came to the side of a dry pit,
+when, looking round to see that no one was nigh, he laid his table on the
+grass, and, sitting down with his legs over the side of the pit, he
+motioned me to do the same.  'So you are in want of employ?' said he,
+after I had sat down beside him.
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'I am very much in want of employ.'
+
+'I think I can find you some.'
+
+'What kind?' said I.
+
+'Why,' said the man, 'I think you would do to be my bonnet.'
+
+'Bonnet!' said I, 'what is that?'
+
+'Don't you know?  However, no wonder, as you had never heard of the
+thimble and pea game, but I will tell you.  We of the game are very much
+exposed; folks when they have lost their money, as those who play with us
+mostly do, sometimes uses rough language, calls us cheats, and sometimes
+knocks our hats over our eyes; and what's more, with a kick under our
+table, cause the top deals to fly off; this is the third table I have
+used this day, the other two being broken by uncivil customers: so we of
+the game generally like to have gentlemen go about with us to take our
+part, and encourage us, though pretending to know nothing about us; for
+example, when the customer says, "I'm cheated," the bonnet must say, "No,
+you ain't, it is all right"; or, when my hat is knocked over my eyes, the
+bonnet must square, and say, "I never saw the man before in all my life,
+but I won't see him ill-used"; and so, when they kicks at the table, the
+bonnet must say, "I won't see the table ill-used, such a nice table, too;
+besides, I want to play myself"; and then I would say to the bonnet,
+"Thank you, my lord, them that finds, wins"; and then the bonnet plays,
+and I lets the bonnet win.'
+
+'In a word,' said I, 'the bonnet means the man who covers you, even as
+the real bonnet covers the head.'
+
+'Just so,' said the man; 'I see you are awake, and would soon make a
+first-rate bonnet.'
+
+'Bonnet,' said I, musingly; 'bonnet; it is metaphorical.'
+
+'Is it?' said the man.
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'like the cant words--'
+
+'Bonnet is cant,' said the man; 'we of the thimble, as well as all cly-
+fakers and the like, understand cant, as, of course, must every bonnet;
+so, if you are employed by me, you had better learn it as soon as you
+can, that we may discourse together without being understood by every
+one.  Besides covering his principal, a bonnet must have his eyes about
+him, for the trade of the pea, though a strictly honest one, is not
+altogether lawful; so it is the duty of the bonnet, if he sees the
+constable coming, to say, The gorgio's welling.'
+
+'That is not cant,' said I, 'that is the language of the Rommany Chals.'
+
+'Do you know those people?' said the man.
+
+'Perfectly,' said I, 'and their language too.'
+
+'I wish I did,' said the man; 'I would give ten pounds and more to know
+the language of the Rommany Chals.  There's some of it in the language of
+the pea and thimble; how it came there I don't know, but so it is.  I
+wish I knew it, but it is difficult.  You'll make a capital bonnet; shall
+we close?'
+
+'What would the wages be?' I demanded.
+
+'Why, to a first-rate bonnet, as I think you would prove, I could afford
+to give from forty to fifty shillings a week.'
+
+'Is it possible?' said I.
+
+'Good wages, ain't they?' said the man.
+
+'First-rate,' said I; 'bonneting is more profitable than reviewing.'
+
+'Anan?' said the man.
+
+'Or translating; I don't think the Armenian would have paid me at that
+rate for translating his Esop.'
+
+'Who is he?' said the man.
+
+'Esop?'
+
+'No, I know what that is, Esop's cant for a hunchback; but t'other?'
+
+'You should know,' said I.
+
+'Never saw the man in all my life.'
+
+'Yes, you have,' said I, 'and felt him too; don't you remember the
+individual from whom you took the pocket-book?'
+
+'Oh, that was he; well, the less said about that matter the better; I
+have left off that trade, and taken to this, which is a much better.
+Between ourselves, I am not sorry that I did not carry off that pocket-
+book; if I had, it might have encouraged me in the trade, in which had I
+remained, I might have been lagged, sent abroad, as I had been already
+imprisoned; so I determined to leave it off at all hazards, though I was
+hard up, not having a penny in the world.'
+
+'And wisely resolved,' said I; 'it was a bad and dangerous trade, I
+wonder you should ever have embraced it.'
+
+'It is all very well talking,' said the man, 'but there is a reason for
+everything; I am the son of a Jewess, by a military officer'--and then
+the man told me his story.  I shall not repeat the man's story, it was a
+poor one, a vile one; at last he observed, 'So that affair which you know
+of determined me to leave the filching trade, and take up with a more
+honest and safe one; so at last I thought of the pea and thimble, but I
+wanted funds, especially to pay for lessons at the hands of a master, for
+I knew little about it.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'how did you get over that difficulty?'
+
+'Why,' said the man, 'I thought I should never have got over it.  What
+funds could I raise?  I had nothing to sell; the few clothes I had I
+wanted, for we of the thimble must always appear decent, or nobody would
+come near us.  I was at my wits' ends; at last I got over my difficulty
+in the strangest way in the world.'
+
+'What was that?'
+
+'By an old thing which I had picked up some time before--a book.'
+
+'A book?' said I.
+
+'Yes, which I had taken out of your lordship's pocket one day as you were
+walking the streets in a great hurry.  I thought it was a pocket-book at
+first, full of bank-notes, perhaps,' continued he, laughing.  'It was
+well for me, however, that it was not, for I should have soon spent the
+notes; as it was, I had flung the old thing down with an oath, as soon as
+I brought it home.  When I was so hard up, however, after the affair with
+that friend of yours, I took it up one day, and thought I might make
+something by it to support myself a day with.  Chance or something else
+led me into a grand shop; there was a man there who seemed to be the
+master, talking to a jolly, portly old gentleman, who seemed to be a
+country squire.  Well, I went up to the first, and offered it for sale;
+he took the book, opened it at the title-page, and then all of a sudden
+his eyes glistened, and he showed it to the fat, jolly gentleman, and his
+eyes glistened too, and I heard him say "How singular!" and then the two
+talked together in a speech I didn't understand--I rather thought it was
+French, at any rate it wasn't cant; and presently the first asked me what
+I would take for the book.  Now I am not altogether a fool, nor am I
+blind, and I had narrowly marked all that passed, and it came into my
+head that now was the time for making a man of myself, at any rate I
+could lose nothing by a little confidence; so I looked the man boldly in
+the face, and said, "I will have five guineas for that book, there ain't
+such another in the whole world."  "Nonsense," said the first man, "there
+are plenty of them, there have been nearly fifty editions, to my
+knowledge; I will give you five shillings."  "No," said I, "I'll not take
+it, for I don't like to be cheated, so give me my book again"; and I
+attempted to take it away from the fat gentleman's hand.  "Stop," said
+the younger man; "are you sure that you won't take less?"  "Not a
+farthing," said I; which was not altogether true, but I said so.  "Well,"
+said the fat gentleman, "I will give you what you ask"; and sure enough
+he presently gave me the money; so I made a bow, and was leaving the
+shop, when it came into my head that there was something odd in all this,
+and, as I had the money in my pocket, I turned back, and, making another
+bow, said, "May I be so bold as to ask why you gave me all this money for
+that 'ere dirty book?  When I came into the shop, I should have been glad
+to get a shilling for it; but I saw you wanted it, and asked five
+guineas."  Then they looked at one another, and smiled, and shrugged up
+their shoulders.  Then the first man, looking at me, said, "Friend, you
+have been a little too sharp for us; however, we can afford to forgive
+you, as my friend here has long been in quest of this particular book;
+there are plenty of editions, as I told you, and a common copy is not
+worth five shillings; but this is a first edition, and a copy of the
+first edition is worth its weight in gold."'
+
+'So, after all, they outwitted you,' I observed.
+
+'Clearly,' said the man; 'I might have got double the price, had I known
+the value; but I don't care, much good may it do them, it has done me
+plenty.  By means of it I have got into an honest, respectable trade, in
+which there's little danger and plenty of profit, and got out of one
+which would have got me lagged, sooner or later.'
+
+'But,' said I, 'you ought to remember that the thing was not yours; you
+took it from me, who had been requested by a poor old apple-woman to
+exchange it for a Bible.'
+
+'Well,' said the man, 'did she ever get her Bible?'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'she got her Bible.'
+
+'Then she has no cause to complain; and, as for you, chance or something
+else has sent you to me, that I may make you reasonable amends for any
+loss you may have had.  Here am I ready to make you my bonnet, with forty
+or fifty shillings a week, which you say yourself are capital wages.'
+
+'I find no fault with the wages,' said I, 'but I don't like the employ.'
+
+'Not like bonneting,' said the man; 'ah, I see, you would like to be
+principal; well, a time may come--those long white fingers of yours would
+just serve for the business.'
+
+'Is it a difficult one?' I demanded.
+
+'Why, it is not very easy: two things are needful--natural talent, and
+constant practice; but I'll show you a point or two connected with the
+game'; and, placing his table between his knees as he sat over the side
+of the pit, he produced three thimbles, and a small brown pellet,
+something resembling a pea.  He moved the thimble and pellet about, now
+placing it to all appearance under one, and now under another; 'Under
+which is it now?' he said at last.  'Under that,' said I, pointing to the
+lowermost of the thimbles, which, as they stood, formed a kind of
+triangle.  'No,' said he, 'it is not, but lift it up'; and, when I lifted
+up the thimble, the pellet, in truth, was not under it.  'It was under
+none of them,' said he, 'it was pressed by my little finger against my
+palm'; and then he showed me how he did the trick, and asked me if the
+game was not a funny one; and, on my answering in the affirmative, he
+said, 'I am glad you like it; come along and let us win some money.'
+
+Thereupon, getting up, he placed the table before him, and was moving
+away; observing, however, that I did not stir, he asked me what I was
+staying for.  'Merely for my own pleasure,' said I; 'I like sitting here
+very well.'  'Then you won't close?' said the man.  'By no means,' I
+replied; 'your proposal does not suit me.'  'You may be principal in
+time,' said the man.  'That makes no difference,' said I; and, sitting
+with my legs over the pit, I forthwith began to decline an Armenian noun.
+'That ain't cant,' said the man; 'no, nor gypsy either.  Well, if you
+won't close, another will, I can't lose any more time,' and forthwith he
+departed.
+
+And after I had declined four Armenian nouns, of different declensions, I
+rose from the side of the pit, and wandered about amongst the various
+groups of people scattered over the green.  Presently I came to where the
+man of the thimbles was standing, with the table before him, and many
+people about him.  'Them who finds, wins, and them who can't find,
+loses,' he cried.  Various individuals tried to find the pellet, but all
+were unsuccessful, till at last considerable dissatisfaction was
+expressed, and the terms rogue and cheat were lavished upon him.  'Never
+cheated anybody in all my life,' he cried; and, observing me at hand,
+'didn't I play fair, my lord?' he inquired.  But I made no answer.
+Presently some more played, and he permitted one or two to win, and the
+eagerness to play with him became greater.  After I had looked on for
+some time, I was moving away: just then I perceived a short, thick
+personage, with a staff in his hand, advancing in a great hurry;
+whereupon, with a sudden impulse, I exclaimed--
+
+   Shoon thimble-engro;
+   Avella gorgio.
+
+The man, who was in the midst of his pea-and-thimble process, no sooner
+heard the last word of the distich than he turned an alarmed look in the
+direction of where I stood; then, glancing around, and perceiving the
+constable, he slipped forthwith his pellet and thimbles into his pocket,
+and, lifting up his table, he cried to the people about him, 'Make way!'
+and with a motion with his head to me, as if to follow him, he darted off
+with a swiftness which the short, pursy constable could by no means
+rival; and whither he went, or what became of him, I know not, inasmuch
+as I turned away in another direction.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIV
+
+
+Mr. Petulengro--Rommany Rye--Lil-writers--One's own horn--Lawfully-earnt
+money--The wooded hill--A great favourite--The shop window--Much wanted.
+
+And, as I wandered along the green, I drew near to a place where several
+men, with a cask beside them, sat carousing in the neighbourhood of a
+small tent.  'Here he comes,' said one of them, as I advanced, and
+standing up he raised his voice and sang:--
+
+   'Here the Gypsy gemman see,
+   With his Roman jib and his rome and dree--
+   Rome and dree, rum and dry
+   Rally round the Rommany Rye.'
+
+It was Mr. Petulengro, who was here diverting himself with several of his
+comrades; they all received me with considerable frankness.  'Sit down,
+brother,' said Mr. Petulengro, 'and take a cup of good ale.'
+
+I sat down.  'Your health, gentlemen,' said I, as I took the cup which
+Mr. Petulengro handed to me.
+
+'Aukko tu pios adrey Rommanis.  Here is your health in Rommany, brother,'
+said Mr. Petulengro; who, having refilled the cup, now emptied it at a
+draught.
+
+'Your health in Rommany, brother,' said Tawno Chikno, to whom the cup
+came next.
+
+'The Rommany Rye,' said a third.
+
+'The Gypsy gentleman,' exclaimed a fourth, drinking.
+
+And then they all sang in chorus:--
+
+   'Here the Gypsy gemman see,
+   With his Roman jib and his rome and dree--
+   Rome and dree, rum and dry
+   Rally round the Rommany Rye.'
+
+{picture:'Here the Gipsy gemman see.': page304.jpg}
+
+'And now, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro, 'seeing that you have drunk and
+been drunken, you will perhaps tell us where you have been, and what
+about?'
+
+'I have been in the Big City,' said I, 'writing lils.'
+
+'How much money have you got in your pocket, brother?' said Mr.
+Petulengro.
+
+'Eighteenpence,' said I; 'all I have in the world.'
+
+'I have been in the Big City, too,' said Mr. Petulengro; 'but I have not
+written lils--I have fought in the ring--I have fifty pounds in my
+pocket--I have much more in the world.  Brother, there is considerable
+difference between us.
+
+'I would rather be the lil-writer, after all,' said the tall, handsome,
+black man; 'indeed, I would wish for nothing better.'
+
+'Why so?' said Mr. Petulengro.
+
+'Because they have so much to say for themselves,' said the black man,
+'even when dead and gone.  When they are laid in the churchyard, it is
+their own fault if people ain't talking of them.  Who will know, after I
+am dead, or bitchadey pawdel, that I was once the beauty of the world, or
+that you Jasper were--'
+
+'The best man in England of my inches.  That's true, Tawno--however,
+here's our brother will perhaps let the world know something about us.'
+
+'Not he,' said the other, with a sigh; 'he'll have quite enough to do in
+writing his own lils, and telling the world how handsome and clever he
+was; and who can blame him?  Not I.  If I could write lils, every word
+should be about myself and my own tacho Rommanis--my own lawful wedded
+wife, which is the same thing.  I tell you what, brother, I once heard a
+wise man say in Brummagem, that "there is nothing like blowing one's own
+horn," which I conceive to be much the same thing as writing one's own
+lil.'
+
+After a little more conversation, Mr. Petulengro arose, and motioned me
+to follow him.  'Only eighteenpence in the world, brother?' said he, as
+we walked together.
+
+'Nothing more, I assure you.  How came you to ask me how much money I
+had?'
+
+'Because there was something in your look, brother, something very much
+resembling that which a person showeth who does not carry much money in
+his pocket.  I was looking at my own face this morning in my wife's
+looking-glass--I did not look as you do, brother.'
+
+'I believe your sole motive for inquiring,' said I, 'was to have an
+opportunity of venting a foolish boast, and to let me know that you were
+in possession of fifty pounds.'
+
+'What is the use of having money unless you let people know you have it?'
+said Mr. Petulengro.  'It is not every one can read faces, brother; and,
+unless you knew I had money, how could you ask me to lend you any?'
+
+'I am not going to ask you to lend me any.'
+
+'Then you may have it without asking; as I said before, I have fifty
+pounds, all lawfully-earnt money, got by fighting in the ring--I will
+lend you that, brother.'
+
+'You are very kind,' said I; 'but I will not take it.'
+
+'Then the half of it?'
+
+'Nor the half of it; but it is getting towards evening, I must go back to
+the Great City.'
+
+'And what will you do in the Boro Foros?'
+
+'I know not,' said I.
+
+'Earn money?
+
+'If I can.'
+
+'And if you can't?'
+
+'Starve!'
+
+'You look ill, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro.
+
+'I do not feel well; the Great City does not agree with me.  Should I be
+so fortunate as to earn some money, I would leave the Big City, and take
+to the woods and fields.'
+
+'You may do that, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro, 'whether you have money
+or not.  Our tents and horses are on the other side of yonder wooded
+hill, come and stay with us; we shall all be glad of your company, but
+more especially myself and my wife Pakomovna.'
+
+'What hill is that?' I demanded.
+
+And then Mr. Petulengro told me the name of the hill.  'We shall stay on
+t'other side of the hill a fortnight,' he continued; 'and, as you are
+fond of lil-writing, you may employ yourself profitably whilst there.  You
+can write the lil of him whose dock gallops down that hill every night,
+even as the living man was wont to do long ago.'
+
+'Who was he?' I demanded.
+
+'Jemmy Abershaw,' said Mr. Petulengro; 'one of those whom we call Boro
+drom engroes, and the gorgios highway-men.  I once heard a rye say that
+the life of that man would fetch much money; so come to the other side of
+the hill, and write the lil in the tent of Jasper and his wife
+Pakomovna.'
+
+{picture:'Even as the living man was wont to do long ago.': page307.jpg}
+
+At first I felt inclined to accept the invitation of Mr. Petulengro; a
+little consideration, however, determined me to decline it.  I had always
+been on excellent terms with Mr. Petulengro, but I reflected that people
+might be excellent friends when they met occasionally in the street, or
+on the heath, or in the wood; but that these very people when living
+together in a house, to say nothing of a tent, might quarrel.  I
+reflected, moreover, that Mr. Petulengro had a wife.  I had always, it is
+true, been a great favourite with Mrs. Petulengro, who had frequently
+been loud in her commendation of the young rye, as she called me, and his
+turn of conversation; but this was at a time when I stood in need of
+nothing, lived under my parents' roof, and only visited at the tents to
+divert and to be diverted.  The times were altered, and I was by no means
+certain that Mrs. Petulengro, when she should discover that I was in need
+both of shelter and subsistence, might not alter her opinion both with
+respect to the individual and what he said--stigmatising my conversation
+as saucy discourse, and myself as a scurvy companion; and that she might
+bring over her husband to her own way of thinking, provided, indeed, he
+should need any conducting.  I therefore, though without declaring my
+reasons, declined the offer of Mr. Petulengro, and presently, after
+shaking him by the hand, bent again my course towards the Great City.
+
+I crossed the river at a bridge considerably above that hight of London;
+for, not being acquainted with the way, I missed the turning which should
+have brought me to the latter.  Suddenly I found myself in a street of
+which I had some recollection, and mechanically stopped before the window
+of a shop at which various publications were exposed; it was that of the
+bookseller to whom I had last applied in the hope of selling my ballads
+or Ab Gwilym, and who had given me hopes that, in the event of my writing
+a decent novel, or a tale, he would prove a purchaser.  As I stood
+listlessly looking at the window, and the publications which it
+contained, I observed a paper affixed to the glass by wafers with
+something written upon it.  I drew yet nearer for the purpose of
+inspecting it; the writing was in a fair round hand--'A Novel or Tale is
+much wanted,' was what was written.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LV
+
+
+Bread and water--Pair play--Fashion--Colonel B-----Joseph Sell--The
+kindly glow--Easiest manner imaginable.
+
+'I must do something,' said I, as I sat that night in my lonely
+apartment, with some bread and a pitcher of water before me.
+
+Thereupon taking some of the bread, and eating it, I considered what I
+was to do.  'I have no idea what I am to do,' said I, as I stretched my
+hand towards the pitcher, 'unless (and here I took a considerable
+draught) I write a tale or a novel--That bookseller,' I continued,
+speaking to myself, 'is certainly much in need of a tale or a novel,
+otherwise he would not advertise for one.  Suppose I write one, I appear
+to have no other chance of extricating myself from my present
+difficulties; surely it was Fate that conducted me to his window.
+
+'I will do it,' said I, as I struck my hand against the table; 'I will do
+it.'  Suddenly a heavy cloud of despondency came over me.  Could I do it?
+Had I the imagination requisite to write a tale or a novel?  'Yes, yes,'
+said I, as I struck my hand again against the table, 'I can manage it;
+give me fair play, and I can accomplish anything.'
+
+But should I have fair play?  I must have something to maintain myself
+with whilst I wrote my tale, and I had but eighteenpence in the world.
+Would that maintain me whilst I wrote my tale?  Yes, I thought it would,
+provided I ate bread, which did not cost much, and drank water, which
+cost nothing; it was poor diet, it was true, but better men than myself
+had written on bread and water; had not the big man told me so? or
+something to that effect, months before?
+
+It was true there was my lodging to pay for; but up to the present time I
+owed nothing, and perhaps, by the time that the people of the house asked
+me for money, I should have written a tale or a novel, which would bring
+me in money; I had paper, pens, and ink, and, let me not forget them, I
+had candles in my closet, all paid for, to light me during my night work.
+Enough, I would go doggedly to work upon my tale or novel.
+
+But what was the tale or novel to be about?  Was it to be a tale of
+fashionable life, about Sir Harry Somebody, and the Countess something?
+But I knew nothing about fashionable people, and cared less; therefore
+how should I attempt to describe fashionable life? What should the tale
+consist of?  The life and adventures of some one.  Good--but of whom?  Did
+not Mr. Petulengro mention one Jemmy Abershaw?  Yes.  Did he not tell me
+that the life and adventures of Jemmy Abershaw would bring in much money
+to the writer?  Yes, but I knew nothing of that worthy.  I heard, it is
+true, from Mr. Petulengro, that when alive he committed robberies on the
+hill, on the side of which Mr. Petulengro had pitched his tents, and that
+his ghost still haunted the hill at midnight; but those were scant
+materials out of which to write the man's life.  It is probable indeed,
+that Mr. Petulengro would be able to supply me with further materials if
+I should apply to him, but I was in a hurry, and could not afford the
+time which it would be necessary to spend in passing to and from Mr.
+Petulengro, and consulting him.  Moreover, my pride revolted at the idea
+of being beholden to Mr. Petulengro for the materials of the history.  No,
+I would not write the history of Abershaw.  Whose then--Harry Simms?
+Alas, the life of Harry Simms had been already much better written by
+himself than I could hope to do it; and, after all, Harry Simms, like
+Jemmy Abershaw, was merely a robber.  Both, though bold and extraordinary
+men, were merely highwaymen.  I questioned whether I could compose a tale
+likely to excite any particular interest out of the exploits of a mere
+robber.  I want a character for my hero, thought I, something higher than
+a mere robber; some one like--like Colonel B---.  By the way, why should
+I not write the life and adventures of Colonel B---, of Londonderry in
+Ireland?
+
+A truly singular man was this same Colonel B---, of Londonderry in
+Ireland; a personage of most strange and incredible feats and daring, who
+had been a partizan soldier, a bravo--who, assisted by certain
+discontented troopers, nearly succeeded in stealing the crown and regalia
+from the Tower of London; who attempted to hang the Duke of Ormond at
+Tyburn; and whose strange, eventful career did not terminate even with
+his life, his dead body, on the circulation of an unfounded report that
+he did not come to his death by fair means, having been exhumed by the
+mob of his native place, where he had retired to die, and carried in the
+coffin through the streets.
+
+Of his life I had inserted an account in the _Newgate Lives and Trials_;
+it was bare and meagre, and written in the stiff, awkward style of the
+seventeenth century; it had, however, strongly captivated my imagination,
+and I now thought that out of it something better could be made; that, if
+I added to the adventures, and purified the style, I might fashion out of
+it a very decent tale or novel.  On a sudden, however, the proverb of
+mending old garments with new cloth occurred to me.  'I am afraid,' said
+I, 'any new adventures which I can invent will not fadge well with the
+old tale; one will but spoil the other.'  I had better have nothing to do
+with Colonel B---, thought I, but boldly and independently sit down and
+write the life of Joseph Sell.
+
+This Joseph Sell, dear reader, was a fictitious personage who had just
+come into my head.  I had never even heard of the name, but just at that
+moment it happened to come into my head; I would write an entirely
+fictitious narrative, called the _Life and Adventures of Joseph Sell_,
+the great traveller.
+
+I had better begin at once, thought I; and removing the bread and the
+jug, which latter was now empty, I seized pen and paper, and forthwith
+essayed to write the life of Joseph Sell, but soon discovered that it is
+much easier to resolve upon a thing than to achieve it, or even to
+commence it; for the life of me I did not know how to begin, and, after
+trying in vain to write a line, I thought it would be as well to go to
+bed, and defer my projected undertaking till the morrow.
+
+So I went to bed, but not to sleep.  During the greater part of the night
+I lay awake, musing upon the work which I had determined to execute.  For
+a long time my brain was dry and unproductive; I could form no plan which
+appeared feasible.  At length I felt within my brain a kindly glow; it
+was the commencement of inspiration; in a few minutes I had formed my
+plan; I then began to imagine the scenes and the incidents.  Scenes and
+incidents flitted before my mind's eye so plentifully, that I knew not
+how to dispose of them; I was in a regular embarrassment.  At length I
+got out of the difficulty in the easiest manner imaginable, namely, by
+consigning to the depths of oblivion all the feebler and less stimulant
+scenes and incidents, and retaining the better and more impressive ones.
+Before morning I had sketched the whole work on the tablets of my mind,
+and then resigned myself to sleep in the pleasing conviction that the
+most difficult part of my undertaking was achieved.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVI
+
+
+Considerably sobered--Power of writing--The tempter--Hungry talent--Work
+concluded.
+
+Rather late in the morning I awoke; for a few minutes I lay still,
+perfectly still; my imagination was considerably sobered; the scenes and
+situations which had pleased me so much over night appeared to me in a
+far less captivating guise that morning.  I felt languid and almost
+hopeless--the thought, however, of my situation soon roused me--I must
+make an effort to improve the posture of my affairs; there was no time to
+be lost; so I sprang out of bed, breakfasted on bread and water, and then
+sat down doggedly to write the life of Joseph Sell.
+
+It was a great thing to have formed my plan, and to have arranged the
+scenes in my head, as I had done on the preceding night.  The chief thing
+requisite at present was the mere mechanical act of committing them to
+paper.  This I did not find at first so easy as I could wish--I wanted
+mechanical skill; but I persevered, and before evening I had written ten
+pages.  I partook of some bread and water; and before I went to bed that
+night, I had completed fifteen pages of my life of Joseph Sell.
+
+The next day I resumed my task--I found my power of writing considerably
+increased; my pen hurried rapidly over the paper--my brain was in a
+wonderfully teeming state; many scenes and visions which I had not
+thought of before were evolved, and, as fast as evolved, written down;
+they seemed to be more pat to my purpose, and more natural to my history,
+than many others which I had imagined before, and which I made now give
+place to these newer creations: by about midnight I had added thirty
+fresh pages to my _Life and Adventures of Joseph Sell_.
+
+The third day arose--it was dark and dreary out of doors, and I passed it
+drearily enough within; my brain appeared to have lost much of its former
+glow, and my pen much of its power; I, however, toiled on, but at
+midnight had only added seven pages to my history of Joseph Sell.
+
+On the fourth day the sun shone brightly--I arose, and, having
+breakfasted as usual, I fell to work.  My brain was this day wonderfully
+prolific, and my pen never before or since glided so rapidly over the
+paper; towards night I began to feel strangely about the back part of my
+head, and my whole system was extraordinarily affected.  I likewise
+occasionally saw double--a tempter now seemed to be at work within me.
+
+'You had better leave off now for a short space,' said the tempter, 'and
+go out and drink a pint of beer; you have still one shilling left--if you
+go on at this rate, you will go mad--go out and spend sixpence, you can
+afford it, more than half your work is done.'  I was about to obey the
+suggestion of the tempter, when the idea struck me that, if I did not
+complete the work whilst the fit was on me, I should never complete it;
+so I held on. I am almost afraid to state how many pages I wrote that day
+of the life of Joseph Sell.
+
+From this time I proceeded in a somewhat more leisurely manner; but, as I
+drew nearer and nearer to the completion of my task, dreadful fears and
+despondencies came over me.--It will be too late, thought I; by the time
+I have finished the work, the bookseller will have been supplied with a
+tale or a novel.  Is it probable that, in a town like this, where talent
+is so abundant--hungry talent too--a bookseller can advertise for a tale
+or a novel, without being supplied with half a dozen in twenty-four
+hours?  I may as well fling down my pen--I am writing to no purpose.  And
+these thoughts came over my mind so often, that at last, in utter
+despair, I flung down the pen.  Whereupon the tempter within me
+said--'And, now you have flung down the pen, you may as well fling
+yourself out of the window; what remains for you to do?'  Why, to take it
+up again, thought I to myself, for I did not like the latter suggestion
+at all--and then forthwith I resumed the pen, and wrote with greater
+vigour than before, from about six o'clock in the evening until I could
+hardly see, when I rested for a while, when the tempter within me again
+said, or appeared to say--'All you have been writing is stuff, it will
+never do--a drug--a mere drug'; and methought these last words were
+uttered in the gruff tones of the big publisher.  'A thing merely to be
+sneezed at,' a voice like that of Taggart added; and then I seemed to
+hear a sternutation,--as I probably did, for, recovering from a kind of
+swoon, I found myself shivering with cold.  The next day I brought my
+work to a conclusion.
+
+But the task of revision still remained; for an hour or two I shrank from
+it, and remained gazing stupidly at the pile of paper which I had written
+over.  I was all but exhausted, and I dreaded, on inspecting the sheets,
+to find them full of absurdities which I had paid no regard to in the
+furor of composition.  But the task, however trying to my nerves, must be
+got over; at last, in a kind of desperation, I entered upon it.  It was
+far from an easy one; there were, however, fewer errors and absurdities
+than I had anticipated.  About twelve o'clock at night I had got over the
+task of revision.  'To-morrow for the bookseller,' said I, as my head
+sank on the pillow.  'Oh me!'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVII
+
+
+Nervous look--The bookseller's wife--The last stake--Terms--God
+forbid!--Will you come to tea?--A light heart.
+
+On arriving at the bookseller's shop, I cast a nervous look at the
+window, for the purpose of observing whether the paper had been removed
+or not.  To my great delight the paper was in its place; with a beating
+heart I entered, there was nobody in the shop; as I stood at the counter,
+however, deliberating whether or not I should call out, the door of what
+seemed to be a back-parlour opened, and out came a well-dressed lady-like
+female, of about thirty, with a good-looking and intelligent countenance.
+'What is your business, young man?' said she to me, after I had made her
+a polite bow.  'I wish to speak to the gentleman of the house,' said I.
+'My husband is not within at present,' she replied; 'what is your
+business?'  'I have merely brought something to show him,' said I, 'but I
+will call again.'  'If you are the young gentleman who has been here
+before,' said the lady, 'with poems and ballads, as, indeed, I know you
+are,' she added, smiling, 'for I have seen you through the glass door, I
+am afraid it will be useless; that is,' she added with another smile, 'if
+you bring us nothing else.'  'I have not brought you poems and ballads
+now,' said I, 'but something widely different; I saw your advertisement
+for a tale or a novel, and have written something which I think will
+suit; and here it is,' I added, showing the roll of paper which I held in
+my hand.  'Well,' said the bookseller's wife, 'you may leave it, though I
+cannot promise you much chance of its being accepted.  My husband has
+already had several offered to him; however, you may leave it; give it
+me.  Are you afraid to intrust it to me?' she demanded somewhat hastily,
+observing that I hesitated.  'Excuse me,' said I, 'but it is all I have
+to depend upon in the world; I am chiefly apprehensive that it will not
+be read.'  'On that point I can reassure you,' said the good lady,
+smiling, and there was now something sweet in her smile.  'I give you my
+word that it shall be read; come again to-morrow morning at eleven, when,
+if not approved, it shall be returned to you.'
+
+I returned to my lodging, and forthwith betook myself to bed,
+notwithstanding the earliness of the hour.  I felt tolerably tranquil; I
+had now cast my last stake, and was prepared to abide by the result.
+Whatever that result might be, I could have nothing to reproach myself
+with; I had strained all the energies which nature had given me in order
+to rescue myself from the difficulties which surrounded me.  I presently
+sank into a sleep, which endured during the remainder of the day, and the
+whole of the succeeding night.  I awoke about nine on the morrow, and
+spent my last threepence on a breakfast somewhat more luxurious than the
+immediately preceding ones, for one penny of the sum was expended on the
+purchase of milk.
+
+At the appointed hour I repaired to the house of the bookseller; the
+bookseller was in his shop.  'Ah,' said he, as soon as I entered, 'I am
+glad to see you.'  There was an unwonted heartiness in the bookseller's
+tones, an unwonted benignity in his face.  'So,' said he, after a pause,
+'you have taken my advice, written a book of adventure; nothing like
+taking the advice, young man, of your superiors in age.  Well, I think
+your book will do, and so does my wife, for whose judgment I have a great
+regard; as well I may, as she is the daughter of a first-rate novelist,
+deceased.  I think I shall venture on sending your book to the press.'
+'But,' said I, 'we have not yet agreed upon terms.'  'Terms, terms,' said
+the bookseller; 'ahem! well, there is nothing like coming to terms at
+once.  I will print the book, and give you half the profit when the
+edition is sold.'  'That will not do,' said I; 'I intend shortly to leave
+London: I must have something at once.'  'Ah, I see,' said the
+bookseller, 'in distress; frequently the case with authors, especially
+young ones.  Well, I don't care if I purchase it of you, but you must be
+moderate; the public are very fastidious, and the speculation may prove a
+losing one after all.  Let me see, will five--hem--' he stopped.  I
+looked the bookseller in the face; there was something peculiar in it.
+Suddenly it appeared to me as if the voice of him of the thimble sounded
+in my ear, 'Now is your time, ask enough, never such another chance of
+establishing yourself; respectable trade, pea and thimble.'  'Well,' said
+I at last, 'I have no objection to take the offer which you were about to
+make, though I really think five-and-twenty guineas to be scarcely
+enough, everything considered.'  'Five-and-twenty guineas!' said the
+bookseller; 'are you--what was I going to say--I never meant to offer
+half as much--I mean a quarter; I was going to say five guineas--I mean
+pounds; I will, however, make it up guineas.'  'That will not do,' said
+I; 'but, as I find we shall not deal, return me my manuscript, that I may
+carry it to some one else.'  The bookseller looked blank.  'Dear me,'
+said he, 'I should never have supposed that you would have made any
+objection to such an offer; I am quite sure that you would have been glad
+to take five pounds for either of the two huge manuscripts of songs and
+ballads that you brought me on a former occasion.'  'Well,' said I, 'if
+you will engage to publish either of those two manuscripts, you shall
+have the present one for five pounds.'  'God forbid that I should make
+any such bargain!' said the bookseller; 'I would publish neither on any
+account; but, with respect to this last book, I have really an
+inclination to print it, both for your sake and mine; suppose we say ten
+pounds.'  'No,' said I, 'ten pounds will not do; pray restore me my
+manuscript.'  'Stay,' said the bookseller, 'my wife is in the next room,
+I will go and consult her.'  Thereupon he went into his back room, where
+I heard him conversing with his wife in a low tone; in about ten minutes
+he returned.  'Young gentleman,' said he, 'perhaps you will take tea with
+us this evening, when we will talk further over the matter.'
+
+That evening I went and took tea with the bookseller and his wife, both
+of whom, particularly the latter, overwhelmed me with civility.  It was
+not long before I learned that the work had been already sent to the
+press, and was intended to stand at the head of a series of entertaining
+narratives, from which my friends promised themselves considerable
+profit.  The subject of terms was again brought forward.  I stood firm to
+my first demand for a long time; when, however, the bookseller's wife
+complimented me on my production in the highest terms, and said that she
+discovered therein the germs of genius, which she made no doubt would
+some day prove ornamental to my native land, I consented to drop my
+demand to twenty pounds, stipulating, however, that I should not be
+troubled with the correction of the work.
+
+Before I departed, I received the twenty pounds, and departed with a
+light heart to my lodgings.
+
+Reader, amidst the difficulties and dangers of this life, should you ever
+be tempted to despair, call to mind these latter chapters of the life of
+Lavengro.  There are few positions, however difficult, from which dogged
+resolution and perseverance may not liberate you.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVIII
+
+
+Indisposition--A resolution--Poor equivalents--The piece of gold--Flashing
+eyes--How beautiful--Bon jour, Monsieur.
+
+I had long ago determined to leave London as soon as the means should be
+in my power, and, now that they were, I determined to leave the Great
+City; yet I felt some reluctance to go.  I would fain have pursued the
+career of original authorship which had just opened itself to me, and
+have written other tales of adventure.  The bookseller had given me
+encouragement enough to do so; he had assured me that he should be always
+happy to deal with me for an article (that was the word) similar to the
+one I had brought him, provided my terms were moderate; and the
+bookseller's wife, by her complimentary language, had given me yet more
+encouragement.  But for some months past I had been far from well, and my
+original indisposition, brought on partly by the peculiar atmosphere of
+the Big City, partly by anxiety of mind, had been much increased by the
+exertions which I had been compelled to make during the last few days.  I
+felt that, were I to remain where I was, I should die, or become a
+confirmed valetudinarian.  I would go forth into the country, travelling
+on foot, and, by exercise and inhaling pure air, endeavour to recover my
+health, leaving my subsequent movements to be determined by Providence.
+
+But whither should I bend my course?  Once or twice I thought of walking
+home to the old town, stay some time with my mother and my brother, and
+enjoy the pleasant walks in the neighbourhood; but, though I wished very
+much to see my mother and my brother, and felt much disposed to enjoy the
+said pleasant walks, the old town was not exactly the place to which I
+wished to go at this present juncture.  I was afraid that people would
+ask, Where are your Northern Ballads?  Where are your alliterative
+translations from Ab Gwilym--of which you were always talking, and with
+which you promised to astonish the world?  Now, in the event of such
+interrogations, what could I answer?  It is true I had compiled _Newgate
+Lives and Trials_, and had written the life of Joseph Sell, but I was
+afraid that the people of the old town would scarcely consider these as
+equivalents for the Northern Ballads and the songs of Ab Gwilym.  I would
+go forth and wander in any direction but that of the old town.
+
+But how one's sensibility on any particular point diminishes with time;
+at present I enter the old town perfectly indifferent as to what the
+people may be thinking on the subject of the songs and ballads.  With
+respect to the people themselves, whether, like my sensibility, their
+curiosity has altogether evaporated, whether, which is at least equally
+probable, they never entertained any, one thing is certain, that never in
+a single instance have they troubled me with any remarks on the subject
+of the songs and ballads.
+
+As it was my intention to travel on foot, with a bundle and a stick, I
+despatched my trunk containing some few clothes and books to the old
+town.  My preparations were soon made; in about three days I was in
+readiness to start.
+
+Before departing, however, I bethought me of my old friend the
+apple-woman of London Bridge.  Apprehensive that she might be labouring
+under the difficulties of poverty, I sent her a piece of gold by the
+hands of a young maiden in the house in which I lived.  The latter
+punctually executed her commission, but brought me back the piece of
+gold.  The old woman would not take it; she did not want it, she said.
+'Tell the poor thin lad,' she added, 'to keep it for himself, he wants it
+more than I.'
+
+Rather late one afternoon I departed from my lodging, with my stick in
+one hand and a small bundle in the other, shaping my course to the south-
+west: when I first arrived, somewhat more than a year before, I had
+entered the city by the north-east.  As I was not going home, I
+determined to take my departure in the direction the very opposite to
+home.
+
+Just as I was about to cross the street called the Haymarket, at the
+lower part, a cabriolet, drawn by a magnificent animal, came dashing
+along at a furious rate; it stopped close by the curb-stone where I was,
+a sudden pull of the reins nearly bringing the spirited animal upon its
+haunches.  The Jehu who had accomplished this feat was Francis Ardry.  A
+small beautiful female, with flashing eyes, dressed in the extremity of
+fashion, sat beside him.
+
+'Holloa, friend,' said Francis Ardry, 'whither bound?'
+
+'I do not know,' said I; 'all I can say is, that I am about to leave
+London.'
+
+'And the means?' said Francis Ardry.
+
+'I have them,' said I, with a cheerful smile.
+
+'Qui est celui-ci?' demanded the small female, impatiently.
+
+'C'est--mon ami le plus intime; so you were about to leave London,
+without telling me a word,' said Francis Ardry, somewhat angrily.
+
+'I intended to have written to you,' said I: 'what a splendid mare that
+is.'
+
+'Is she not?' said Francis Ardry, who was holding in the mare with
+difficulty; 'she cost a hundred guineas.'
+
+'Qu'est ce qu'il dit?' demanded his companion.
+
+'Il dit que le jument est bien beau.'
+
+'Allons, mon ami, il est tard,' said the beauty, with a scornful toss of
+her head; 'allons!'
+
+'Encore un moment,' said Francis Ardry; 'and when shall I see you again?'
+
+'I scarcely know,' I replied: 'I never saw a more splendid turn out.'
+
+'Qu'est ce qu'il dit?' I said the lady again.
+
+'Il dit que tout l'equipage est en assez bon gout.'
+
+'Allons, c'est un ours,' said the lady; 'le cheval meme en a peur,' added
+she, as the mare reared up on high.
+
+'Can you find nothing else to admire but the mare and the equipage?' said
+Francis Ardry, reproachfully, after he had with some difficulty brought
+the mare to order.
+
+Lifting my hand, in which I held my stick, I took off my hat.  'How
+beautiful!' said I, looking the lady full in the face.
+
+'Comment?' said the lady, inquiringly.
+
+'Il dit que vous etes belle comme un ange,' said Francis Ardry,
+emphatically.
+
+'Mais, a la bonne heure! arretez, mon ami,' said the lady to Francis
+Ardry, who was about to drive off; 'je voudrais bien causer un moment
+avec lui; arretez, il est delicieux.--Est-ce bien ainsi que vous traitez
+vos amis?' said she passionately, as Francis Ardry lifted up his whip.
+'Bon jour, Monsieur, bon jour,' said she, thrusting her head from the
+side and looking back, as Francis Ardry drove off at the rate of thirteen
+miles an hour.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIX
+
+
+The milestone--The meditation--Want to get up?--The off-hand
+leader--Sixteen shillings--The near-hand wheeler--All right.
+
+In about two hours I had cleared the Great City, and got beyond the
+suburban villages, or rather towns, in the direction in which I was
+travelling; I was in a broad and excellent road, leading I knew not
+whither.  I now slackened my pace, which had hitherto been great.
+Presently, coming to a milestone on which was graven nine miles, I rested
+against it, and looking round towards the vast city, which had long
+ceased to be visible, I fell into a train of meditation.
+
+{picture:Presently, coming to a milestone, I rested against it, and,
+looking round towards the vast city, I fell into a train of meditation:
+page321.jpg}
+
+I thought of all my ways and doings since the day of my first arrival in
+that vast city--I had worked and toiled, and, though I had accomplished
+nothing at all commensurate with the hopes which I had entertained
+previous to my arrival, I had achieved my own living, preserved my
+independence, and become indebted to no one.  I was now quitting it, poor
+in purse, it is true, but not wholly empty; rather ailing it may be, but
+not broken in health; and, with hope within my bosom, had I not cause
+upon the whole to be thankful?  Perhaps there were some who, arriving at
+the same time under not more favourable circumstances, had accomplished
+much more, and whose future was far more hopeful--Good!  But there might
+be others who, in spite of all their efforts, had been either trodden
+down in the press, never more to be heard of, or were quitting that
+mighty town broken in purse, broken in health, and, oh! with not one dear
+hope to cheer them.  Had I not, upon the whole, abundant cause to be
+grateful?  Truly, yes!
+
+My meditation over, I left the milestone and proceeded on my way in the
+same direction as before until the night began to close in.  I had always
+been a good pedestrian; but now, whether owing to indisposition or to not
+having for some time past been much in the habit of taking such lengthy
+walks, I began to feel not a little weary.  Just as I was thinking of
+putting up for the night at the next inn or public-house I should arrive
+at, I heard what sounded like a coach coming up rapidly behind me.
+Induced, perhaps, by the weariness which I felt, I stopped and looked
+wistfully in the direction of the sound; presently up came a coach,
+seemingly a mail, drawn by four bounding horses--there was no one upon it
+but the coachman and the guard; when nearly parallel with me it stopped.
+'Want to get up?' sounded a voice, in the true coachman-like tone--half
+querulous, half authoritative.  I hesitated; I was tired, it is true, but
+I had left London bound on a pedestrian excursion, and I did not much
+like the idea of having recourse to a coach after accomplishing so very
+inconsiderable a distance.  'Come, we can't be staying here all night,'
+said the voice, more sharply than before.  'I can ride a little way, and
+get down whenever I like,' thought I; and springing forward I clambered
+up the coach, and was going to sit down upon the box, next the coachman.
+'No, no,' said the coachman, who was a man about thirty, with a hooked
+nose and red face, dressed in a fashionably-cut greatcoat, with a
+fashionable black castor on his head.  'No, no, keep behind--the box
+ain't for the like of you,' said he, as he drove off; 'the box is for
+lords, or gentlemen at least.'  I made no answer.  'D--- that off-hand
+leader,' said the coachman, as the right-hand front horse made a
+desperate start at something he saw in the road; and, half rising, he
+with great dexterity hit with his long whip the off-hand leader a cut on
+the off cheek.  'These seem to be fine horses,' said I.  The coachman
+made no answer.  'Nearly thoroughbred,' I continued; the coachman drew
+his breath, with a kind of hissing sound, through his teeth.  'Come,
+young fellow, none of your chaff.  Don't you think, because you ride on
+my mail, I'm going to talk to you about 'orses.  I talk to nobody about
+'orses except lords.'  'Well,' said I, 'I have been called a lord in my
+time.'  'It must have been by a thimble-rigger, then,' said the coachman,
+bending back, and half turning his face round with a broad leer.  'You
+have hit the mark wonderfully,' said I.  'You coachmen, whatever else you
+may be, are certainly no fools.'  'We ain't, ain't we?' said the
+coachman.  'There you are right; and, to show you that you are, I'll now
+trouble you for your fare.  If you have been amongst the thimble-riggers
+you must be tolerably well cleared out.  Where are you going?--to--?  I
+think I have seen you there.  The fare is sixteen shillings.  Come, tip
+us the blunt; them that has no money can't ride on my mail.'
+
+Sixteen shillings was a large sum, and to pay it would make a
+considerable inroad on my slender finances; I thought, at first, that I
+would say I did not want to go so far; but then the fellow would ask at
+once where I wanted to go, and I was ashamed to acknowledge my utter
+ignorance of the road.  I determined, therefore, to pay the fare, with a
+tacit determination not to mount a coach in future without knowing
+whither I was going.  So I paid the man the money, who, turning round,
+shouted to the guard--'All right, Jem; got fare to--'; and forthwith
+whipped on his horses, especially the off hand leader, for whom he seemed
+to entertain a particular spite, to greater speed than before--the horses
+flew.
+
+A young moon gave a feeble light, partially illuminating a line of road
+which, appearing by no means interesting, I the less regretted having
+paid my money for the privilege of being hurried along it in the flying
+vehicle.  We frequently changed horses; and at last my friend the
+coachman was replaced by another, the very image of himself--hawk nose,
+red face, with narrow-rimmed hat and fashionable benjamin.  After he had
+driven about fifty yards, the new coachman fell to whipping one of the
+horses.  'D--- this near-hand wheeler,' said he, 'the brute has got a
+corn.'  'Whipping him won't cure him of his corn,' said I.  'Who told you
+to speak?' said the driver, with an oath; 'mind your own business;
+'tisn't from the like of you I am to learn to drive 'orses.'  Presently I
+fell into a broken kind of slumber.  In an hour or two I was aroused by a
+rough voice--'Got to ---, young man; get down if you please.'  I opened
+my eyes--there was a dim and indistinct light, like that which precedes
+dawn; the coach was standing still in something like a street; just below
+me stood the guard.  'Do you mean to get down,' said he, 'or will you
+keep us here till morning? other fares want to get up.'  Scarcely knowing
+what I did, I took my bundle and stick and descended, whilst two people
+mounted.  'All right, John,' said the guard to the coachman, springing up
+behind; whereupon off whisked the coach, one or two individuals who were
+standing by disappeared, and I was left alone.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LX
+
+
+The still hour--A thrill--The wondrous circle--The shepherd--Heaps and
+barrows--What do you mean?--Milk of the plains--Hengist spared it--No
+presents.
+
+After standing still a minute or two, considering what I should do, I
+moved down what appeared to be the street of a small straggling town;
+presently I passed by a church, which rose indistinctly on my right hand;
+anon there was the rustling of foliage and the rushing of waters.  I
+reached a bridge, beneath which a small stream was running in the
+direction of the south.  I stopped and leaned over the parapet, for I
+have always loved to look upon streams, especially at the still hours.
+'What stream is this, I wonder?' said I, as I looked down from the
+parapet into the water, which whirled and gurgled below.
+
+Leaving the bridge, I ascended a gentle acclivity, and presently reached
+what appeared to be a tract of moory undulating ground.  It was now
+tolerably light, but there was a mist or haze abroad which prevented my
+seeing objects with much precision.  I felt chill in the damp air of the
+early morn, and walked rapidly forward.  In about half an hour I arrived
+where the road divided into two, at an angle or tongue of dark green
+sward.  'To the right or the left?' said I, and forthwith took, without
+knowing why, the left-hand road, along which I proceeded about a hundred
+yards, when, in the midst of the tongue of sward formed by the two roads,
+collaterally with myself, I perceived what I at first conceived to be a
+small grove of blighted trunks of oaks, barked and gray.  I stood still
+for a moment, and then, turning off the road, advanced slowly towards it
+over the sward; as I drew nearer, I perceived that the objects which had
+attracted my curiosity, and which formed a kind of circle, were not
+trees, but immense upright stones.  A thrill pervaded my system; just
+before me were two, the mightiest of the whole, tall as the stems of
+proud oaks, supporting on their tops a huge transverse stone, and forming
+a wonderful doorway.  I knew now where I was, and, laying down my stick
+and bundle, and taking off my hat, I advanced slowly, and cast myself--it
+was folly, perhaps, but I could not help what I did--cast myself, with my
+face on the dewy earth, in the middle of the portal of giants, beneath
+the transverse stone.
+
+{picture:I cast myself with my face on the dewy earth.  The spirit of
+Stonehenge was strong upon me!: page326.jpg}
+
+The spirit of Stonehenge was strong upon me!
+
+And after I had remained with my face on the ground for some time, I
+arose, placed my hat on my head, and, taking up my stick and bundle,
+wandered round the wondrous circle, examining each individual stone, from
+the greatest to the least; and then, entering by the great door, seated
+myself upon an immense broad stone, one side of which was supported by
+several small ones, and the other slanted upon the earth; and there, in
+deep meditation, I sat for an hour or two, till the sun shone in my face
+above the tall stones of the eastern side.
+
+And as I still sat there, I heard the noise of bells, and presently a
+large number of sheep came browsing past the circle of stones; two or
+three entered, and grazed upon what they could find, and soon a man also
+entered the circle at the northern side.
+
+'Early here, sir,' said the man, who was tall, and dressed in a dark
+green slop, and had all the appearance of a shepherd; 'a traveller, I
+suppose?'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'I am a traveller; are these sheep yours?'
+
+'They are, sir; that is, they are my master's.  A strange place this,
+sir,' said he, looking at the stones; 'ever here before?'
+
+'Never in body, frequently in mind.'
+
+'Heard of the stones, I suppose; no wonder--all the people of the plain
+talk of them.'
+
+'What do the people of the plain say of them?'
+
+'Why, they say--How did they ever come here?'
+
+'Do they not suppose them to have been brought?'
+
+'Who should have brought them?'
+
+'I have read that they were brought by many thousand men.'
+
+'Where from?'
+
+'Ireland.'
+
+'How did they bring them?'
+
+'I don't know.'
+
+'And what did they bring them for?'
+
+'To form a temple, perhaps.'
+
+'What is that?'
+
+'A place to worship God in.'
+
+'A strange place to worship God in.'
+
+'Why?'
+
+'It has no roof.'
+
+'Yes, it has.'
+
+'Where?' said the man, looking up.
+
+'What do you see above you?'
+
+'The sky.'
+
+'Well?'
+
+'Well!'
+
+'Have you anything to say?'
+
+'How did these stones come here?'
+
+'Are there other stones like these on the plains?' said I.
+
+'None; and yet there are plenty of strange things on these downs.'
+
+'What are they?'
+
+'Strange heaps, and barrows, and great walls of earth built on the tops
+of hills.'
+
+'Do the people of the plain wonder how they came there?'
+
+'They do not.'
+
+'Why?'
+
+'They were raised by hands.'
+
+'And these stones?'
+
+'How did they ever come here?'
+
+'I wonder whether they are here?' said I.
+
+'These stones?'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'So sure as the world,' said the man; 'and, as the world, they will stand
+as long.'
+
+'I wonder whether there is a world.'
+
+'What do you mean?'
+
+'An earth, and sea, moon and stars, sheep and men.'
+
+'Do you doubt it?'
+
+'Sometimes.'
+
+'I never heard it doubted before.'
+
+'It is impossible there should be a world.'
+
+'It ain't possible there shouldn't be a world.'
+
+'Just so.'  At this moment a fine ewe, attended by a lamb, rushed into
+the circle and fondled the knees of the shepherd.  'I suppose you would
+not care to have some milk,' said the man.
+
+'Why do you suppose so?'
+
+'Because, so be there be no sheep, no milk, you know; and what there
+ben't is not worth having.'
+
+'You could not have argued better,' said I; 'that is, supposing you have
+argued; with respect to the milk you may do as you please.'
+
+'Be still, Nanny,' said the man; and producing a tin vessel from his
+scrip, he milked the ewe into it.  'Here is milk of the plains, master,'
+said the man, as he handed the vessel to me.
+
+'Where are those barrows and great walls of earth you were speaking of?'
+said I, after I had drunk some of the milk; 'are there any near where we
+are?'
+
+'Not within many miles; the nearest is yonder away,' said the shepherd,
+pointing to the south-east.  'It's a grand place, that, but not like
+this; quite different, and from it you have a sight of the finest spire
+in the world.'
+
+{picture:'The nearest is yonder away,' said the shepherd, pointing to the
+south-east: page329.jpg}
+
+'I must go to it,' said I, and I drank the remainder of the milk;
+'yonder, you say.'
+
+'Yes, yonder; but you cannot get to it in that direction, the river lies
+between.'
+
+'What river?'
+
+'The Avon.'
+
+'Avon is British,' said I.
+
+'Yes,' said the man, 'we are all British here.'
+
+'No, we are not,' said I.
+
+'What are we then?'
+
+'English.'
+
+'Ain't they one?'
+
+'No.'
+
+'Who were the British?'
+
+'The men who are supposed to have worshipped God in this place, and who
+raised these stones.'
+
+'Where are they now?'
+
+'Our forefathers slaughtered them, spilled their blood all about,
+especially in this neighbourhood, destroyed their pleasant places, and
+left not, to use their own words, one stone upon another.'
+
+'Yes, they did,' said the shepherd, looking aloft at the transverse
+stone.
+
+'And it is well for them they did; whenever that stone, which English
+hands never raised, is by English hands thrown down, woe, woe, woe to the
+English race; spare it, English! Hengist spared it!--Here is sixpence.'
+
+'I won't have it,' said the man.
+
+'Why not?'
+
+'You talk so prettily about these stones; you seem to know all about
+them.'
+
+'I never receive presents; with respect to the stones, I say with
+yourself, How did they ever come here?'
+
+'How did they ever come here?' said the shepherd.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXI
+
+
+The river--Arid downs--A prospect.
+
+Leaving the shepherd, I bent my way in the direction pointed out by him
+as that in which the most remarkable of the strange remains of which he
+had spoken lay.  I proceeded rapidly, making my way over the downs
+covered with coarse grass and fern; with respect to the river of which he
+had spoken, I reflected that, either by wading or swimming, I could
+easily transfer myself and what I bore to the opposite side.  On arriving
+at its banks, I found it a beautiful stream, but shallow, with here and
+there a deep place where the water ran dark and still.
+
+Always fond of the pure lymph, I undressed, and plunged into one of these
+gulfs, from which I emerged, my whole frame in a glow, and tingling with
+delicious sensations.  After conveying my clothes and scanty baggage to
+the farther side, I dressed, and then with hurried steps bent my course
+in the direction of some lofty ground; I at length found myself on a high-
+road, leading over wide and arid downs; following the road for some miles
+without seeing anything remarkable, I supposed at length that I had taken
+the wrong path, and wended on slowly and disconsolately for some time,
+till, having nearly surmounted a steep hill, I knew at once, from certain
+appearances, that I was near the object of my search.  Turning to the
+right near the brow of the hill, I proceeded along a path which brought
+me to a causeway leading over a deep ravine, and connecting the hill with
+another which had once formed part of it, for the ravine was evidently
+the work of art.  I passed over the causeway, and found myself in a kind
+of gateway which admitted me into a square space of many acres,
+surrounded on all sides by mounds or ramparts of earth.  Though I had
+never been in such a place before, I knew that I stood within the
+precincts of what had been a Roman encampment, and one probably of the
+largest size, for many thousand warriors might have found room to perform
+their evolutions in that space, in which corn was now growing, the green
+ears waving in the morning wind.
+
+After I had gazed about the space for a time, standing in the gateway
+formed by the mounds, I clambered up the mound to the left hand, and on
+the top of that mound I found myself at a great altitude; beneath, at the
+distance of a mile, was a fair old city, situated amongst verdant
+meadows, watered with streams, and from the heart of that old city, from
+amidst mighty trees, I beheld towering to the sky the finest spire in the
+world.
+
+And after I had looked from the Roman rampart for a long time, I hurried
+away, and, retracing my steps along the cause-way, regained the road,
+and, passing over the brow of the hill, descended to the city of the
+spire.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXII
+
+
+The hostelry--Life uncertain--Open countenance--The grand point--Thank
+you, master--A hard mother--Poor dear!--Considerable odds--The better
+country--English fashion--Landlord-looking person.
+
+And in the old city I remained two days, passing my time as I best
+could--inspecting the curiosities of the place, eating and drinking when
+I felt so disposed, which I frequently did, the digestive organs having
+assumed a tone to which for many months they had been strangers--enjoying
+at night balmy sleep in a large bed in a dusky room, at the end of a
+corridor, in a certain hostelry in which I had taken up my
+quarters--receiving from the people of the hostelry such civility and
+condescension as people who travel on foot with bundle and stick, but who
+nevertheless are perceived to be not altogether destitute of coin, are in
+the habit of receiving.  On the third day, on a fine sunny afternoon, I
+departed from the city of the spire.
+
+As I was passing through one of the suburbs, I saw, all on a sudden, a
+respectable-looking female fall down in a fit; several persons hastened
+to her assistance.  'She is dead,' said one.  'No, she is not,' said
+another.  'I am afraid she is,' said a third.  'Life is very uncertain,'
+said a fourth.  'It is Mrs. ---,' said a fifth; 'let us carry her to her
+own house.'  Not being able to render any assistance, I left the poor
+female in the hands of her townsfolk, and proceeded on my way.  I had
+chosen a road in the direction of the north-west, it led over downs where
+corn was growing, but where neither tree nor hedge was to be seen; two or
+three hours' walking brought me to a beautiful valley, abounding with
+trees of various kinds, with a delightful village at its farthest
+extremity; passing through it, I ascended a lofty acclivity, on the top
+of which I sat down on a bank, and, taking off my hat, permitted a
+breeze, which swept coolly and refreshingly over the downs, to dry my
+hair, dripping from the effects of exercise and the heat of the day.
+
+And as I sat there, gazing now at the blue heavens, now at the downs
+before me, a man came along the road in the direction in which I had
+hitherto been proceeding: just opposite to me he stopped, and, looking at
+me, cried--'Am I right for London, master?'
+
+He was dressed like a sailor, and appeared to be between twenty-five and
+thirty years of age--he had an open manly countenance, and there was a
+bold and fearless expression in his eye.
+
+'Yes,' said I, in reply to his question; 'this is one of the ways to
+London.  Do you come from far?'
+
+'From ---,' said the man, naming a well-known seaport.
+
+'Is this the direct road to London from that place?' I demanded.
+
+'No,' said the man; 'but I had to visit two or three other places on
+certain commissions I was intrusted with; amongst others to ---, where I
+had to take a small sum of money.  I am rather tired, master; and, if you
+please, I will sit down beside you.'
+
+'You have as much right to sit down here as I have,' said I; 'the road is
+free for every one; as for sitting down beside me, you have the look of
+an honest man, and I have no objection to your company.'
+
+'Why, as for being honest, master,' said the man, laughing and sitting
+down by me, 'I haven't much to say--many is the wild thing I have done
+when I was younger; however, what is done, is done.  To learn, one must
+live, master; and I have lived long enough to learn the grand point of
+wisdom.'
+
+'What is that?' said I.
+
+'That honesty is the best policy, master.'
+
+'You appear to be a sailor,' said I, looking at his dress.
+
+'I was not bred a sailor,' said the man, 'though, when my foot is on the
+salt water, I can play the part--and play it well too.  I am now from a
+long voyage.'
+
+'From America?' said I.
+
+'Farther than that,' said the man.
+
+'Have you any objection to tell me?' said I.
+
+'From New South Wales,' said the man, looking me full in the face.
+
+'Dear me,' said I.
+
+'Why do you say "Dear me"?' said the man.
+
+'It is a very long way off,' said I.
+
+'Was that your reason for saying so?' said the man.
+
+'Not exactly,' said I.
+
+'No,' said the man, with something of a bitter smile; 'it was something
+else that made you say so; you were thinking of the convicts.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'what then--you are no convict.'
+
+'How do you know?'
+
+'You do not look like one.'
+
+'Thank you, master,' said the man cheerfully; 'and, to a certain extent,
+you are right--bygones are bygones--I am no longer what I was, nor ever
+will be again; the truth, however, is the truth--a convict I have been--a
+convict at Sydney Cove.'
+
+'And you have served out the period for which you were sentenced, and are
+now returned?'
+
+'As to serving out my sentence,' replied the man, 'I can't say that I
+did; I was sentenced for fourteen years, and I was in Sydney Cove little
+more than half that time.  The truth is that I did the Government a
+service.  There was a conspiracy amongst some of the convicts to murder
+and destroy--I overheard and informed the Government; mind one thing,
+however, I was not concerned in it; those who got it up were no comrades
+of mine, but a bloody gang of villains.  Well, the Government, in
+consideration of the service I had done them, remitted the remainder of
+my sentence; and some kind gentlemen interested themselves about me, gave
+me good books and good advice, and, being satisfied with my conduct,
+procured me employ in an exploring expedition, by which I earned money.
+In fact, the being sent to Sydney was the best thing that ever happened
+to me in all my life.'
+
+'And you have now returned to your native country.  Longing to see home
+brought you from New South Wales.'
+
+'There you are mistaken,' said the man.  'Wish to see England again would
+never have brought me so far; for, to tell you the truth, master, England
+was a hard mother to me, as she has proved to many.  No, a wish to see
+another kind of mother--a poor old woman, whose son I am--has brought me
+back.'
+
+'You have a mother, then?' said I.  'Does she reside in London?'
+
+'She used to live in London,' said the man; 'but I am afraid she is long
+since dead.'
+
+'How did she support herself?' said I.
+
+'Support herself! with difficulty enough; she used to keep a small stall
+on London Bridge, where she sold fruit; I am afraid she is dead, and that
+she died perhaps in misery.  She was a poor sinful creature; but I loved
+her, and she loved me.  I came all the way back merely for the chance of
+seeing her.'
+
+'Did you ever write to her,' said I, 'or cause others to write to her?'
+
+'I wrote to her myself,' said the man, 'about two years ago; but I never
+received an answer.  I learned to write very tolerably over there, by the
+assistance of the good people I spoke of.  As for reading, I could do
+that very well before I went--my poor mother taught me to read, out of a
+book that she was very fond of; a strange book it was, I remember.  Poor
+dear!--what I would give only to know that she is alive.'
+
+'Life is very uncertain,' said I.
+
+'That is true,' said the man, with a sigh.
+
+'We are here one moment, and gone the next,' I continued.  'As I passed
+through the streets of a neighbouring town, I saw a respectable woman
+drop down, and people said she was dead.  Who knows but that she too had
+a son coming to see her from a distance, at that very time?'
+
+'Who knows, indeed?' said the man.  'Ah, I am afraid my mother is dead.
+Well, God's will be done.'
+
+'However,' said I, 'I should not wonder at your finding your mother
+alive.'
+
+'You wouldn't?' said the man, looking at me wistfully.
+
+'I should not wonder at all,' said I; 'indeed, something within me seems
+to tell me you will; I should not much mind betting five shillings to
+fivepence that you will see your mother within a week.  Now, friend, five
+shillings to fivepence--'
+
+'Is very considerable odds,' said the man, rubbing his hands; 'sure you
+must have good reason to hope, when you are willing to give such odds.'
+
+'After all,' said I, 'it not unfrequently happens that those who lay the
+long odds lose.  Let us hope, however.  What do you mean to do in the
+event of finding your mother alive?'
+
+'I scarcely know,' said the man; 'I have frequently thought that if I
+found my mother alive I would attempt to persuade her to accompany me to
+the country which I have left--it is a better country for a man--that is,
+a free man--to live in than this; however, let me first find my mother--if
+I could only find my mother--'
+
+'Farewell,' said I, rising.  'Go your way, and God go with you--I will go
+mine.'  'I have but one thing to ask you,' said the man.  'What is that?'
+I inquired.  'That you would drink with me before we part--you have done
+me so much good.'  'How should we drink?' said I; 'we are on the top of a
+hill where there is nothing to drink.'  'But there is a village below,'
+said the man; 'do let us drink before we part.'  'I have been through
+that village already,' said I, 'and I do not like turning back.'  'Ah,'
+said the man, sorrowfully, 'you will not drink with me because I told you
+I was--'  'You are quite mistaken,' said I, 'I would as soon drink with a
+convict as with a judge.  I am by no means certain that, under the same
+circumstances, the judge would be one whit better than the convict.  Come
+along!  I will go back to oblige you.  I have an odd sixpence in my
+pocket, which I will change that I may drink with you.'  So we went down
+the hill together to the village through which I had already passed,
+where, finding a public-house, we drank together in true English fashion,
+after which we parted, the sailor-looking man going his way and I mine.
+
+After walking about a dozen miles, I came to a town, where I rested for
+the night.  The next morning I set out again in the direction of the
+north-west.  I continued journeying for four days, my daily journeys
+varying from twenty to twenty-five miles.  During this time nothing
+occurred to me worthy of any especial notice.  The weather was brilliant,
+and I rapidly improved both in strength and spirits.  On the fifth day,
+about two o'clock, I arrived at a small town.  Feeling hungry, I entered
+a decent-looking inn--within a kind of bar I saw a huge, fat, landlord-
+looking person, with a very pretty, smartly-dressed maiden.  Addressing
+myself to the fat man, 'House!' said I, 'house!  Can I have dinner,
+house?'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXIII
+
+
+Primitive habits--Rosy-faced damsel--A pleasant moment--Suit of black--The
+furtive glance--The mighty round--Degenerate times--The newspaper--The
+evil chance--I congratulate you.
+
+'Young gentleman,' said the huge fat landlord, 'you are come at the right
+time; dinner will be taken up in a few minutes, and such a dinner,' he
+continued, rubbing his hands, 'as you will not see every day in these
+times.'
+
+'I am hot and dusty,' said I, 'and should wish to cool my hands and
+face.'
+
+'Jenny!' said the huge landlord, with the utmost gravity, 'show the
+gentleman into number seven, that he may wash his hands and face.'
+
+'By no means,' said I, 'I am a person of primitive habits, and there is
+nothing like the pump in weather like this.'
+
+'Jenny,' said the landlord, with the same gravity as before, 'go with the
+young gentleman to the pump in the back kitchen, and take a clean towel
+along with you.'
+
+Thereupon the rosy-faced clean-looking damsel went to a drawer, and
+producing a large, thick, but snowy white towel, she nodded to me to
+follow her; whereupon I followed Jenny through a long passage into the
+back kitchen.
+
+And at the end of the back kitchen there stood a pump; and going to it I
+placed my hands beneath the spout, and said, 'Pump, Jenny'; and Jenny
+incontinently, without laying down the towel, pumped with one hand, and I
+washed and cooled my heated hands.
+
+And, when my hands were washed and cooled, I took off my neckcloth, and,
+unbuttoning my shirt collar, I placed my head beneath the spout of the
+pump, and I said unto Jenny, 'Now, Jenny, lay down the towel, and pump
+for your life.'
+
+{picture:'Now, Jenny, lay down the towel and pump for your life.':
+page338.jpg}
+
+Thereupon Jenny, placing the towel on a linen-horse, took the handle of
+the pump with both hands and pumped over my head as handmaid had never
+pumped before; so that the water poured in torrents from my head, my
+face, and my hair down upon the brick floor.
+
+And, after the lapse of somewhat more than a minute, I called out with a
+half-strangled voice, 'Hold, Jenny!' and Jenny desisted.  I stood for a
+few moments to recover my breath, then taking the towel which Jenny
+proffered, I dried composedly my hands and head, my face and hair; then,
+returning the towel to Jenny, I gave a deep sigh and said, 'Surely this
+is one of the pleasant moments of life.'
+
+Then, having set my dress to rights, and combed my hair with a pocket
+comb, I followed Jenny, who conducted me back through the long passage,
+and showed me into a neat sanded parlour on the ground-floor.
+
+I sat down by a window which looked out upon the dusty street; presently
+in came the handmaid, and commenced laying the table-cloth.  'Shall I
+spread the table for one, sir,' said she, 'or do you expect anybody to
+dine with you?'  'I can't say that I expect anybody,' said I, laughing
+inwardly to myself; 'however, if you please you can lay for two, so that
+if any acquaintance of mine should chance to step in, he may find a knife
+and fork ready for him.'
+
+So I sat by the window, sometimes looking out upon the dusty street, and
+now glancing at certain old-fashioned prints which adorned the wall over
+against me.  I fell into a kind of doze, from which I was almost
+instantly awakened by the opening of the door.  Dinner, thought I; and I
+sat upright in my chair.  No; a man of the middle age, and rather above
+the middle height, dressed in a plain suit of black, made his appearance,
+and sat down in a chair at some distance from me, but near to the table,
+and appeared to be lost in thought.
+
+'The weather is very warm, sir,' said I.
+
+'Very,' said the stranger, laconically, looking at me for the first time.
+
+'Would you like to see the newspaper?' said I, taking up one which lay
+upon the window seat.
+
+'I never read newspapers,' said the stranger, 'nor, indeed,--'  Whatever
+it might be that he had intended to say he left unfinished.  Suddenly he
+walked to the mantelpiece at the farther end of the room, before which he
+placed himself with his back towards me.  There he remained motionless
+for some time; at length, raising his hand, he touched the corner of the
+mantelpiece with his finger, advanced towards the chair which he had
+left, and again seated himself.
+
+'Have you come far?' said he, suddenly looking towards me, and speaking
+in a frank and open manner, which denoted a wish to enter into
+conversation.  'You do not seem to be of this place.'
+
+'I come from some distance,' said I; 'indeed, I am walking for exercise,
+which I find as necessary to the mind as the body.  I believe that by
+exercise people would escape much mental misery.'
+
+Scarcely had I uttered these words when the stranger laid his hand, with
+seeming carelessness, upon the table, near one of the glasses; after a
+moment or two he touched the glass with his finger as if inadvertently,
+then, glancing furtively at me, he withdrew his hand and looked towards
+the window.
+
+'Are you from these parts?' said I at last, with apparent carelessness.
+
+'From this vicinity,' replied the stranger.  'You think, then, that it is
+as easy to walk off the bad humours of the mind as of the body?'
+
+'I, at least, am walking in that hope,' said I.
+
+'I wish you may be successful,' said the stranger; and here he touched
+one of the forks which lay on the table near him.
+
+Here the door, which was slightly ajar, was suddenly pushed open with
+some fracas, and in came the stout landlord, supporting with some
+difficulty an immense dish, in which was a mighty round mass of smoking
+meat garnished all round with vegetables; so high was the mass that it
+probably obstructed his view, for it was not until he had placed it upon
+the table that he appeared to observe the stranger; he almost started,
+and quite out of breath exclaimed, 'God bless me, your honour; is your
+honour the acquaintance that the young gentleman was expecting?'
+
+'Is the young gentleman expecting an acquaintance?' said the stranger.
+
+There is nothing like putting a good face upon these matters, thought I
+to myself; and, getting up, I bowed to the unknown.  'Sir,' said I, 'when
+I told Jenny that she might lay the table-cloth for two, so that in the
+event of any acquaintance dropping in he might find a knife and fork
+ready for him, I was merely jocular, being an entire stranger in these
+parts, and expecting no one.  Fortune, however, it would seem, has been
+unexpectedly kind to me; I flatter myself, sir, that since you have been
+in this room I have had the honour of making your acquaintance; and in
+the strength of that hope I humbly entreat you to honour me with your
+company to dinner, provided you have not already dined.'
+
+The stranger laughed outright.
+
+'Sir,' I continued, 'the round of beef is a noble one, and seems
+exceedingly well boiled, and the landlord was just right when he said I
+should have such a dinner as is not seen every day.  A round of beef, at
+any rate such a round of beef as this, is seldom seen smoking upon the
+table in these degenerate times.  Allow me, sir,' said I, observing that
+the stranger was about to speak, 'allow me another remark.  I think I saw
+you just now touch the fork; I venture to hail it as an omen that you
+will presently seize it, and apply it to its proper purpose, and its
+companion the knife also.'
+
+The stranger changed colour, and gazed upon me in silence.
+
+'Do, sir,' here put in the landlord; 'do, sir, accept the young
+gentleman's invitation.  Your honour has of late been looking poorly, and
+the young gentleman is a funny young gentleman, and a clever young
+gentleman; and I think it will do your honour good to have a dinner's
+chat with the young gentleman.'
+
+'It is not my dinner hour,' said the stranger; 'I dine considerably
+later; taking anything now would only discompose me; I shall, however, be
+most happy to sit down with the young gentleman; reach me that paper,
+and, when the young gentleman has satisfied his appetite, we may perhaps
+have a little chat together.'
+
+The landlord handed the stranger the newspaper, and, bowing, retired with
+his maid Jenny.  I helped myself to a portion of the smoking round, and
+commenced eating with no little appetite.  The stranger appeared to be
+soon engrossed with the newspaper.  We continued thus a considerable
+time--the one reading and the other dining.  Chancing suddenly to cast my
+eyes upon the stranger, I saw his brow contract; he gave a slight stamp
+with his foot, and flung the newspaper to the ground, then stooping down
+he picked it up, first moving his forefinger along the floor, seemingly
+slightly scratching it with his nail.
+
+'Do you hope, sir,' said I, 'by that ceremony with the finger to preserve
+yourself from the evil chance?'
+
+The stranger started; then, after looking at me for some time in silence,
+he said, 'Is it possible that you--?'
+
+'Ay, ay,' said I, helping myself to some more of the round; 'I have
+touched myself in my younger days, both for the evil chance and the good.
+Can't say, though, that I ever trusted much in the ceremony.'
+
+The stranger made no reply, but appeared to be in deep thought; nothing
+farther passed between us until I had concluded the dinner, when I said
+to him, 'I shall now be most happy, sir, to have the pleasure of your
+conversation over a pint of wine.'
+
+The stranger rose; 'No, my young friend,' said he, smiling, 'that would
+scarce be fair.  It is my turn now--pray do me the favour to go home with
+me, and accept what hospitality my poor roof can offer; to tell you the
+truth, I wish to have some particular discourse with you which would
+hardly be possible in this place.  As for wine, I can give you some much
+better than you can get here: the landlord is an excellent fellow, but he
+is an innkeeper after all.  I am going out for a moment, and will send
+him in, so that you may settle your account; I trust you will not refuse
+me, I only live about two miles from here.'
+
+I looked in the face of the stranger--it was a fine intelligent face,
+with a cast of melancholy in it.  'Sir,' said I, 'I would go with you
+though you lived four miles instead of two.'
+
+'Who is that gentleman?' said I to the landlord, after I had settled his
+bill; 'I am going home with him.'
+
+'I wish I were going too,' said the fat landlord, laying his hand upon
+his stomach.  'Young gentleman, I shall be a loser by his honour's taking
+you away; but, after all, the truth is the truth--there are few gentlemen
+in these parts like his honour, either for learning or welcoming his
+friends.  Young gentleman, I congratulate you.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXIV
+
+
+New acquaintance--Old French style--The portrait--Taciturnity--The
+evergreen tree--The dark hour--The flash--Ancestors--A fortunate man--A
+posthumous child--Antagonist ideas--The hawks--Flaws--The
+pony--Irresistible impulse--Favourable crisis--The topmost branch--Twenty
+feet--Heartily ashamed.
+
+I found the stranger awaiting me at the door of the inn.  'Like yourself,
+I am fond of walking,' said he, 'and when any little business calls me to
+this place I generally come on foot.'
+
+We were soon out of the town, and in a very beautiful country.  After
+proceeding some distance on the high-road, we turned off, and were
+presently in one of those mazes of lanes for which England is famous; the
+stranger at first seemed inclined to be taciturn; a few observations,
+however, which I made appeared to rouse him, and he soon exhibited not
+only considerable powers of conversation, but stores of information which
+surprised me.  So pleased did I become with my new acquaintance that I
+soon ceased to pay the slightest attention either to place or distance.
+At length the stranger was silent, and I perceived that we had arrived at
+a handsome iron gate and a lodge; the stranger having rung a bell, the
+gate was opened by an old man, and we proceeded along a gravel path,
+which in about five minutes brought us to a large brick house, built
+something in the old French style, having a spacious lawn before it, and
+immediately in front a pond in which were golden fish, and in the middle
+a stone swan discharging quantities of water from its bill.  We ascended
+a spacious flight of steps to the door, which was at once flung open, and
+two servants with powdered hair and in livery of blue plush came out and
+stood one on either side as we passed the threshold.  We entered a large
+hall, and the stranger, taking me by the hand, welcomed me to his poor
+home, as he called it, and then gave orders to another servant, but out
+of livery, to show me to an apartment, and give me whatever assistance I
+might require in my toilet.  Notwithstanding the plea as to primitive
+habits which I had lately made to my other host in the town, I offered no
+objection to this arrangement, but followed the bowing domestic to a
+spacious and airy chamber, where he rendered me all those little nameless
+offices which the somewhat neglected state of my dress required.  When
+everything had been completed to my perfect satisfaction, he told me that
+if I pleased he would conduct me to the library, where dinner would be
+speedily served.
+
+In the library I found a table laid for two; my host was not there,
+having as I supposed not been quite so speedy with his toilet as his
+guest.  Left alone, I looked round the apartment with inquiring eyes; it
+was long and tolerably lofty, the walls from the top to the bottom were
+lined with cases containing books of all sizes and bindings; there was a
+globe or two, a couch, and an easy-chair.  Statues and busts there were
+none, and only one painting, a portrait, that of my host, but not him of
+the mansion.  Over the mantelpiece, the features staringly like, but so
+ridiculously exaggerated that they scarcely resembled those of a human
+being, daubed evidently by the hand of the commonest sign-artist, hung a
+half-length portrait of him of round of beef celebrity--my sturdy host of
+the town.
+
+I had been in the library about ten minutes, amusing myself as I best
+could, when my friend entered; he seemed to have resumed his
+taciturnity--scarce a word escaped his lips till dinner was served, when
+he said, smiling, 'I suppose it would be merely a compliment to ask you
+to partake?'
+
+'I don't know,' said I, seating myself; 'your first course consists of
+troutlets, I am fond of troutlets, and I always like to be
+companionable.'
+
+The dinner was excellent, though I did but little justice to it from the
+circumstance of having already dined; the stranger also, though without
+my excuse, partook but slightly of the good cheer; he still continued
+taciturn, and appeared lost in thought, and every attempt which I made to
+induce him to converse was signally unsuccessful.
+
+And now dinner was removed, and we sat over our wine, and I remember that
+the wine was good, and fully justified the encomiums of my host of the
+town.  Over the wine I made sure that my entertainer would have loosened
+the chain which seemed to tie his tongue--but no!  I endeavoured to tempt
+him by various topics, and talked of geometry and the use of the globes,
+of the heavenly sphere, and the star Jupiter, which I said I had heard
+was a very large star, also of the evergreen tree, which, according to
+Olaus, stood of old before the heathen temple of Upsal, and which I
+affirmed was a yew--but no, nothing that I said could induce my
+entertainer to relax his taciturnity.
+
+It grew dark, and I became uncomfortable.  'I must presently be going,' I
+at last exclaimed.
+
+At these words he gave a sudden start; 'Going,' said he, 'are you not my
+guest, and an honoured one?'
+
+'You know best,' said I; 'but I was apprehensive I was an intruder; to
+several of my questions you have returned no answer.'
+
+'Ten thousand pardons!' he exclaimed, seizing me by the hand; 'but you
+cannot go now, I have much to talk to you about--there is one thing in
+particular--'
+
+'If it be the evergreen tree at Upsal,' said I, interrupting him, 'I hold
+it to have been a yew--what else?  The evergreens of the south, as the
+old bishop observes, will not grow in the north, and a pine was unfitted
+for such a locality, being a vulgar tree.  What else could it have been
+but the yew--the sacred yew which our ancestors were in the habit of
+planting in their churchyards?  Moreover, I affirm it to have been the
+yew for the honour of the tree; for I love the yew, and had I home and
+land, I would have one growing before my front windows.'
+
+'You would do right, the yew is indeed a venerable tree, but it is not
+about the yew.'
+
+'The star Jupiter, perhaps?'
+
+'Nor the star Jupiter, nor its moons; an observation which escaped you at
+the inn has made a considerable impression upon me.'
+
+'But I really must take my departure,' said I; 'the dark hour is at
+hand.'
+
+And as I uttered these latter words the stranger touched rapidly
+something which lay near him--I forget what it was.  It was the first
+action of the kind which I had observed on his part since we sat down to
+table.
+
+'You allude to the evil chance,' said I; 'but it is getting both dark and
+late.'
+
+'I believe we are going to have a storm,' said my friend, 'but I really
+hope that you will give me your company for a day or two; I have, as I
+said before, much to talk to you about.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'I shall be most happy to be your guest for this night; I
+am ignorant of the country, and it is not pleasant to travel unknown
+paths by night--dear me, what a flash of lightning.'
+
+It had become very dark; suddenly a blaze of sheet lightning illumed the
+room.  By the momentary light I distinctly saw my host touch another
+object upon the table.
+
+'Will you allow me to ask you a question or two?' said he at last.
+
+'As many as you please,' said I; 'but shall we not have lights?'
+
+'Not unless you particularly wish it,' said my entertainer; 'I rather
+like the dark, and though a storm is evidently at hand, neither thunder
+nor lightning has any terrors for me.  It is other things I quake at--I
+should rather say ideas.  Now permit me to ask you--'
+
+And then my entertainer asked me various questions, to all of which I
+answered unreservedly; he was then silent for some time, at last he
+exclaimed, 'I should wish to tell you the history of my life--though not
+an adventurous one, I think it contains some things which will interest
+you.'
+
+Without waiting for my reply he began.  Amidst darkness and gloom,
+occasionally broken by flashes of lightning, the stranger related to me,
+as we sat at table in the library, his truly touching history.
+
+'Before proceeding to relate the events of my life, it will not be amiss
+to give you some account of my ancestors.  My great-grandfather on the
+male side was a silk mercer, in Cheapside, who, when he died, left his
+son, who was his only child, a fortune of one hundred thousand pounds and
+a splendid business; the son, however, had no inclination for trade, the
+summit of his ambition was to be a country gentleman, to found a family,
+and to pass the remainder of his days in rural ease and dignity, and all
+this he managed to accomplish; he disposed of his business, purchased a
+beautiful and extensive estate for fourscore thousand pounds, built upon
+it the mansion to which I had the honour of welcoming you to-day, married
+the daughter of a neighbouring squire, who brought him a fortune of five
+thousand pounds, became a magistrate, and only wanted a son and heir to
+make him completely happy; this blessing, it is true, was for a long time
+denied him; it came, however, at last, as is usual, when least expected.
+His lady was brought to bed of my father, and then who so happy a man as
+my grandsire; he gave away two thousand pounds in charities, and in the
+joy of his heart made a speech at the next quarter sessions; the rest of
+his life was spent in ease, tranquillity, and rural dignity; he died of
+apoplexy on the day that my father came of age; perhaps it would be
+difficult to mention a man who in all respects was so fortunate as my
+grandfather: his death was sudden it is true, but I am not one of those
+who pray to be delivered from a sudden death.
+
+'I should not call my father a fortunate man; it is true that he had the
+advantage of a first-rate education; that he made the grand tour with a
+private tutor, as was the fashion at that time; that he came to a
+splendid fortune on the very day that he came of age; that for many years
+he tasted all the diversions of the capital that, at last determined to
+settle, he married the sister of a baronet, an amiable and accomplished
+lady, with a large fortune; that he had the best stud of hunters in the
+county, on which, during the season, he followed the fox gallantly; had
+he been a fortunate man he would never have cursed his fate, as he was
+frequently known to do; ten months after his marriage his horse fell upon
+him, and so injured him, that he expired in a few days in great agony.  My
+grandfather was, indeed, a fortunate man; when he died he was followed to
+the grave by the tears of the poor--my father was not.
+
+'Two remarkable circumstances are connected with my birth--I am a
+posthumous child, and came into the world some weeks before the usual
+time, the shock which my mother experienced at my father's death having
+brought on the pangs of premature labour; both my mother's life and my
+own were at first despaired of; we both, however, survived the crisis.  My
+mother loved me with the most passionate fondness, and I was brought up
+in this house under her own eye--I was never sent to school.
+
+'I have already told you that mine is not a tale of adventure; my life
+has not been one of action, but of wild imaginings and strange
+sensations; I was born with excessive sensibility, and that has been my
+bane.  I have not been a fortunate man.
+
+'No one is fortunate unless he is happy, and it is impossible for a being
+constructed like myself to be happy for an hour, or even enjoy peace and
+tranquillity; most of our pleasures and pains are the effects of
+imagination, and wherever the sensibility is great, the imagination is
+great also.  No sooner has my imagination raised up an image of pleasure,
+than it is sure to conjure up one of distress and gloom; these two
+antagonist ideas instantly commence a struggle in my mind, and the gloomy
+one generally, I may say invariably, prevails.  How is it possible that I
+should be a happy man?
+
+'It has invariably been so with me from the earliest period that I can
+remember; the first playthings that were given me caused me for a few
+minutes excessive pleasure: they were pretty and glittering; presently,
+however, I became anxious and perplexed, I wished to know their history,
+how they were made, and what of--were the materials precious?  I was not
+satisfied with their outward appearance.  In less than an hour I had
+broken the playthings in an attempt to discover what they were made of.
+
+'When I was eight years of age my uncle the baronet, who was also my
+godfather, sent me a pair of Norway hawks, with directions for managing
+them; he was a great fowler.  Oh, how rejoiced was I with the present
+which had been made me, my joy lasted for at least five minutes; I would
+let them breed, I would have a house of hawks; yes, that I would--but--and
+here came the unpleasant idea--suppose they were to fly away, how very
+annoying!  Ah, but, said hope, there's little fear of that; feed them
+well and they will never fly away, or if they do they will come back, my
+uncle says so; so sunshine triumphed for a little time.  Then the
+strangest of all doubts came into my head; I doubted the legality of my
+tenure of these hawks; how did I come by them? why, my uncle gave them to
+me, but how did they come into his possession? what right had he to them?
+after all, they might not be his to give.  I passed a sleepless night.
+The next morning I found that the man who brought the hawks had not
+departed.  "How came my uncle by these hawks?" I anxiously inquired.
+"They were sent to him from Norway, master, with another pair."  "And who
+sent them?"  "That I don't know, master, but I suppose his honour can
+tell you."  I was even thinking of scrawling a letter to my uncle to make
+inquiry on this point, but shame restrained me, and I likewise reflected
+that it would be impossible for him to give my mind entire satisfaction;
+it is true he could tell who sent him the hawks, but how was he to know
+how the hawks came into the possession of those who sent them to him, and
+by what right they possessed them or the parents of the hawks?  In a
+word, I wanted a clear valid title, as lawyers would say, to my hawks,
+and I believe no title would have satisfied me that did not extend up to
+the time of the first hawk, that is, prior to Adam; and, could I have
+obtained such a title, I make no doubt that, young as I was, I should
+have suspected that it was full of flaws.
+
+'I was now disgusted with the hawks, and no wonder, seeing all the
+disquietude they had caused me; I soon totally neglected the poor birds,
+and they would have starved had not some of the servants taken compassion
+upon them and fed them.  My uncle, soon hearing of my neglect, was angry,
+and took the birds away; he was a very good-natured man, however, and
+soon sent me a fine pony; at first I was charmed with the pony, soon,
+however, the same kind of thoughts arose which had disgusted me on a
+former occasion.  How did my uncle become possessed of the pony?  This
+question I asked him the first time I saw him.  Oh, he had bought it of a
+gypsy, that I might learn to ride upon it.  A gypsy; I had heard that
+gypsies were great thieves, and I instantly began to fear that the gypsy
+had stolen the pony, and it is probable that for this apprehension I had
+better grounds than for many others.  I instantly ceased to set any value
+upon the pony, but for that reason, perhaps, I turned it to some account;
+I mounted it and rode it about, which I don't think I should have done
+had I looked upon it as a secure possession.  Had I looked upon my title
+as secure, I should have prized it so much, that I should scarcely have
+mounted it for fear of injuring the animal; but now, caring not a straw
+for it, I rode it most unmercifully, and soon became a capital rider.
+This was very selfish in me, and I tell the fact with shame.  I was
+punished, however, as I deserved; the pony had a spirit of its own, and,
+moreover, it had belonged to gypsies; once, as I was riding it furiously
+over the lawn, applying both whip and spur, it suddenly lifted up its
+heels, and flung me at least five yards over its head.  I received some
+desperate contusions, and was taken up for dead; it was many months
+before I perfectly recovered.
+
+'But it is time for me to come to the touching part of my story.  There
+was one thing that I loved better than the choicest gift which could be
+bestowed upon me, better than life itself--my mother;--at length she
+became unwell, and the thought that I might possibly lose her now rushed
+into my mind for the first time; it was terrible, and caused me
+unspeakable misery, I may say horror.  My mother became worse, and I was
+not allowed to enter her apartment, lest by my frantic exclamations of
+grief I might aggravate her disorder.  I rested neither day nor night,
+but roamed about the house like one distracted.  Suddenly I found myself
+doing that which even at the time struck me as being highly singular; I
+found myself touching particular objects that were near me, and to which
+my fingers seemed to be attracted by an irresistible impulse.  It was now
+the table or the chair that I was compelled to touch; now the bell-rope;
+now the handle of the door; now I would touch the wall, and the next
+moment, stooping down, I would place the point of my finger upon the
+floor: and so I continued to do day after day; frequently I would
+struggle to resist the impulse, but invariably in vain.  I have even
+rushed away from the object, but I was sure to return, the impulse was
+too strong to be resisted: I quickly hurried back, compelled by the
+feeling within me to touch the object.  Now I need not tell you that what
+impelled me to these actions was the desire to prevent my mother's death;
+whenever I touched any particular object, it was with the view of
+baffling the evil chance, as you would call it--in this instance my
+mother's death.
+
+'A favourable crisis occurred in my mother's complaint, and she
+recovered; this crisis took place about six o'clock in the morning;
+almost simultaneously with it there happened to myself a rather
+remarkable circumstance connected with the nervous feeling which was
+rioting in my system.  I was lying in bed in a kind of uneasy doze, the
+only kind of rest which my anxiety on account of my mother permitted me
+at this time to take, when all at once I sprang up as if electrified; the
+mysterious impulse was upon me, and it urged me to go without delay, and
+climb a stately elm behind the house, and touch the topmost branch;
+otherwise--you know the rest--the evil chance would prevail.  Accustomed
+for some time as I had been, under this impulse, to perform extravagant
+actions, I confess to you that the difficulty and peril of such a feat
+startled me; I reasoned against the feeling, and strove more strenuously
+than I had ever done before; I even made a solemn vow not to give way to
+the temptation, but I believe nothing less than chains, and those strong
+ones, could have restrained me.  The demoniac influence, for I can call
+it nothing else, at length prevailed; it compelled me to rise, to dress
+myself, to descend the stairs, to unbolt the door, and to go forth; it
+drove me to the foot of the tree, and it compelled me to climb the trunk;
+this was a tremendous task, and I only accomplished it after repeated
+falls and trials.  When I had got amongst the branches, I rested for a
+time, and then set about accomplishing the remainder of the ascent; this
+for some time was not so difficult, for I was now amongst the branches;
+as I approached the top, however, the difficulty became greater, and
+likewise the danger; but I was a light boy, and almost as nimble as a
+squirrel, and, moreover, the nervous feeling was within me, impelling me
+upward.  It was only by means of a spring, however, that I was enabled to
+touch the top of the tree; I sprang, touched the top of the tree, and
+fell a distance of at least twenty feet, amongst the branches; had I
+fallen to the bottom I must have been killed, but I fell into the middle
+of the tree, and presently found myself astride upon one of the boughs;
+scratched and bruised all over, I reached the ground, and regained my
+chamber unobserved; I flung myself on my bed quite exhausted; presently
+they came to tell me that my mother was better--they found me in the
+state which I have described, and in a fever besides.  The favourable
+crisis must have occurred just about the time that I performed the magic
+touch; it certainly was a curious coincidence, yet I was not weak enough,
+even though a child, to suppose that I had baffled the evil chance by my
+daring feat.
+
+'Indeed, all the time that I was performing these strange feats, I knew
+them to be highly absurd, yet the impulse to perform them was
+irresistible--a mysterious dread hanging over me till I had given way to
+it; even at that early period I frequently used to reason within myself
+as to what could be the cause of my propensity to touch, but of course I
+could come to no satisfactory conclusion respecting it; being heartily
+ashamed of the practice, I never spoke of it to any one, and was at all
+times highly solicitous that no one should observe my weakness.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXV
+
+
+Maternal anxiety--The baronet--Little zest--Country life--Mr.
+Speaker!--The craving--Spirited address--An author.
+
+After a short pause my host resumed his narration.  'Though I was never
+sent to school, my education was not neglected on that account; I had
+tutors in various branches of knowledge, under whom I made a tolerable
+progress; by the time I was eighteen I was able to read most of the Greek
+and Latin authors with facility; I was likewise, to a certain degree, a
+mathematician.  I cannot say that I took much pleasure in my studies; my
+chief aim in endeavouring to accomplish my tasks was to give pleasure to
+my beloved parent, who watched my progress with anxiety truly maternal.
+My life at this period may be summed up in a few words: I pursued my
+studies, roamed about the woods, walked the green lanes occasionally,
+cast my fly in a trout stream, and sometimes, but not often, rode
+a-hunting with my uncle.  A considerable part of my time was devoted to
+my mother, conversing with her and reading to her; youthful companions I
+had none, and as to my mother, she lived in the greatest retirement,
+devoting herself to the superintendence of my education, and the practice
+of acts of charity; nothing could be more innocent than this mode of
+life, and some people say that in innocence there is happiness, yet I
+can't say that I was happy.  A continual dread overshadowed my mind, it
+was the dread of my mother's death.  Her constitution had never been
+strong, and it had been considerably shaken by her last illness; this I
+knew, and this I saw--for the eyes of fear are marvellously keen.  Well,
+things went on in this way till I had come of age; my tutors were then
+dismissed, and my uncle the baronet took me in hand, telling my mother
+that it was high time for him to exert his authority; that I must see
+something of the world, for that, if I remained much longer with her, I
+should be ruined.  "You must consign him to me," said he, "and I will
+introduce him to the world."  My mother sighed and consented; so my uncle
+the baronet introduced me to the world, took me to horse-races and to
+London, and endeavoured to make a man of me according to his idea of the
+term, and in part succeeded.  I became moderately dissipated--I say
+moderately, for dissipation had but little zest for me.
+
+'In this manner four years passed over.  It happened that I was in London
+in the height of the season with my uncle, at his house; one morning he
+summoned me into the parlour, he was standing before the fire, and looked
+very serious.  "I have had a letter," said he; "your mother is very ill."
+I staggered, and touched the nearest object to me; nothing was said for
+two or three minutes, and then my uncle put his lips to my ear and
+whispered something.  I fell down senseless.  My mother was . . . I
+remember nothing for a long time--for two years I was out of my mind; at
+the end of this time I recovered, or partly so.  My uncle the baronet was
+very kind to me; he advised me to travel, he offered to go with me.  I
+told him he was very kind, but I would rather go by myself.  So I went
+abroad, and saw, amongst other things, Rome and the Pyramids.  By
+frequent change of scene my mind became not happy, but tolerably
+tranquil.  I continued abroad some years, when, becoming tired of
+travelling, I came home, found my uncle the baronet alive, hearty, and
+unmarried, as he still is.  He received me very kindly, took me to
+Newmarket, and said that he hoped by this time I was become quite a man
+of the world; by his advice I took a house in town, in which I lived
+during the season.  In summer I strolled from one watering-place to
+another; and, in order to pass the time, I became very dissipated.
+
+'At last I became as tired of dissipation as I had previously been of
+travelling, and I determined to retire to the country, and live on my
+paternal estate; this resolution I was not slow in putting into effect; I
+sold my house in town, repaired and refurnished my country house, and,
+for at least ten years, lived a regular country life; I gave dinner
+parties, prosecuted poachers, was charitable to the poor, and now and
+then went into my library; during this time I was seldom or never visited
+by the magic impulse, the reason being that there was nothing in the wide
+world for which I cared sufficiently to move a finger to preserve it.
+When the ten years, however, were nearly ended, I started out of bed one
+morning in a fit of horror, exclaiming, "Mercy, mercy! what will become
+of me?  I am afraid I shall go mad.  I have lived thirty-five years and
+upwards without doing anything; shall I pass through life in this manner?
+Horror!"  And then in rapid succession I touched three different objects.
+
+'I dressed myself and went down, determining to set about something; but
+what was I to do?--there was the difficulty.  I ate no breakfast, but
+walked about the room in a state of distraction; at last I thought that
+the easiest way to do something was to get into Parliament, there would
+be no difficulty in that.  I had plenty of money, and could buy a seat;
+but what was I to do in Parliament?  Speak, of course--but could I speak?
+"I'll try at once," said I, and forthwith I rushed into the largest
+dining-room, and, locking the door, I commenced speaking: "Mr. Speaker,"
+said I, and then I went on speaking for about ten minutes as I best
+could, and then I left off, for I was talking nonsense.  No, I was not
+formed for Parliament; I could do nothing there.  What--what was I to do?
+
+'Many, many times I thought this question over, but was unable to solve
+it; a fear now stole over me that I was unfit for anything in the world,
+save the lazy life of vegetation which I had for many years been leading;
+yet, if that were the case, thought I, why the craving within me to
+distinguish myself?  Surely it does not occur fortuitously, but is
+intended to rouse and call into exercise certain latent powers that I
+possess? and then with infinite eagerness I set about attempting to
+discover these latent powers.  I tried an infinity of pursuits, botany
+and geology amongst the rest, but in vain; I was fitted for none of them.
+I became very sorrowful and despondent, and at one time I had almost
+resolved to plunge again into the whirlpool of dissipation; it was a
+dreadful resource, it was true, but what better could I do?
+
+'But I was not doomed to return to the dissipation of the world.  One
+morning a young nobleman, who had for some time past showed a wish to
+cultivate my acquaintance, came to me in a considerable hurry.  "I am
+come to beg an important favour of you," said he; "one of the county
+memberships is vacant--I intend to become a candidate; what I want
+immediately is a spirited address to the electors.  I have been
+endeavouring to frame one all the morning, but in vain; I have,
+therefore, recourse to you as a person of infinite genius; pray, my dear
+friend, concoct me one by the morning!"  "What you require of me," I
+replied, "is impossible; I have not the gift of words; did I possess it I
+would stand for the county myself, but I can't speak.  Only the other day
+I attempted to make a speech, but left off suddenly, utterly ashamed,
+although I was quite alone, of the nonsense I was uttering."  "It is not
+a speech that I want," said my friend; "I can talk for three hours
+without hesitating, but I want an address to circulate through the
+county, and I find myself utterly incompetent to put one together; do
+oblige me by writing one for me, I know you can; and, if at any time you
+want a person to speak for you, you may command me not for three but for
+six hours.  Good-morning; to-morrow I will breakfast with you."  In the
+morning he came again.  "Well," said he, "what success?"  "Very poor,"
+said I; "but judge for yourself"; and I put into his hand a manuscript of
+several pages.  My friend read it through with considerable attention.  "I
+congratulate you," said he, "and likewise myself; I was not mistaken in
+my opinion of you; the address is too long by at least two-thirds, or I
+should rather say, that it is longer by two-thirds than addresses
+generally are; but it will do--I will not curtail it of a word.  I shall
+win my election."  And in truth he did win his election; and it was not
+only his own but the general opinion that he owed it to the address.
+
+'But, however that might be, I had, by writing the address, at last
+discovered what had so long eluded my search--what I was able to do.  I,
+who had neither the nerve nor the command of speech necessary to
+constitute the orator--who had not the power of patient research required
+by those who would investigate the secrets of nature, had, nevertheless,
+a ready pen and teeming imagination.  This discovery decided my fate--from
+that moment I became an author.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXVI
+
+
+Trepidations--Subtle principle--Perverse imagination--Are they
+mine?--Another book--How hard!--Agricultural dinner--Incomprehensible
+actions--Inmost bosom--Give it up--Chance resemblance--Rascally
+newspaper.
+
+'An author,' said I, addressing my host; 'is it possible that I am under
+the roof of an author?'
+
+'Yes,' said my host, sighing, 'my name is so and so, and I am the author
+of so and so; it is more than probable that you have heard both of my
+name and works.  I will not detain you much longer with my history; the
+night is advancing, and the storm appears to be upon the increase.  My
+life since the period of my becoming an author may be summed briefly as
+an almost uninterrupted series of doubts, anxieties, and trepidations.  I
+see clearly that it is not good to love anything immoderately in this
+world, but it has been my misfortune to love immoderately everything on
+which I have set my heart.  This is not good, I repeat--but where is the
+remedy?  The ancients were always in the habit of saying, "Practise
+moderation," but the ancients appear to have considered only one portion
+of the subject.  It is very possible to practise moderation in some
+things, in drink and the like--to restrain the appetites--but can a man
+restrain the affections of his mind, and tell them, so far you shall go,
+and no farther?  Alas, no! for the mind is a subtle principle, and cannot
+be confined.  The winds may be imprisoned; Homer says that Odysseus
+carried certain winds in his ship, confined in leathern bags, but Homer
+never speaks of confining the affections.  It were but right that those
+who exhort us against inordinate affections, and setting our hearts too
+much upon the world and its vanities, would tell us how to avoid doing
+so.
+
+'I need scarcely tell you that no sooner did I become an author than I
+gave myself up immoderately to my vocation.  It became my idol, and, as a
+necessary consequence, it has proved a source of misery and disquietude
+to me, instead of pleasure and blessing.  I had trouble enough in writing
+my first work, and I was not long in discovering that it was one thing to
+write a stirring and spirited address to a set of county electors, and
+another widely different to produce a work at all calculated to make an
+impression upon the great world.  I felt, however, that I was in my
+proper sphere, and by dint of unwearied diligence and exertion I
+succeeded in evolving from the depths of my agitated breast a work which,
+though it did not exactly please me, I thought would serve to make an
+experiment upon the public; so I laid it before the public, and the
+reception which it met with was far beyond my wildest expectations.  The
+public were delighted with it, but what were my feelings?  Anything,
+alas! but those of delight.  No sooner did the public express its
+satisfaction at the result of my endeavours, than my perverse imagination
+began to conceive a thousand chimerical doubts; forthwith I sat down to
+analyse it; and my worst enemy, and all people have their enemies,
+especially authors--my worst enemy could not have discovered or sought to
+discover a tenth part of the faults which I, the author and creator of
+the unfortunate production, found or sought to find in it.  It has been
+said that love makes us blind to the faults of the loved object--common
+love does, perhaps--the love of a father to his child, or that of a lover
+to his mistress, but not the inordinate love of an author to his works,
+at least not the love which one like myself bears to his works: to be
+brief, I discovered a thousand faults in my work, which neither public
+nor critics discovered.  However, I was beginning to get over this
+misery, and to forgive my work all its imperfections, when--and I shake
+when I mention it--the same kind of idea which perplexed me with regard
+to the hawks and the gypsy pony rushed into my mind, and I forthwith
+commenced touching the objects around me, in order to baffle the evil
+chance, as you call it; it was neither more nor less than a doubt of the
+legality of my claim to the thoughts, expressions, and situations
+contained in the book; that is, to all that constituted the book.  How
+did I get them?  How did they come into my mind?  Did I invent them?  Did
+they originate with myself?  Are they my own, or are they some other
+body's?  You see into what difficulty I had got; I won't trouble you by
+relating all that I endured at that time, but will merely say that after
+eating my own heart, as the Italians say, and touching every object that
+came in my way for six months, I at length flung my book, I mean the copy
+of it which I possessed, into the fire, and began another.
+
+'But it was all in vain; I laboured at this other, finished it, and gave
+it to the world; and no sooner had I done so, than the same thought was
+busy in my brain, poisoning all the pleasure which I should otherwise
+have derived from my work.  How did I get all the matter which composed
+it?  Out of my own mind, unquestionably; but how did it come there--was
+it the indigenous growth of the mind?  And then I would sit down and
+ponder over the various scenes and adventures in my book, endeavouring to
+ascertain how I came originally to devise them, and by dint of reflecting
+I remembered that to a single word in conversation, or some simple
+accident in a street or on a road, I was indebted for some of the
+happiest portions of my work; they were but tiny seeds, it is true, which
+in the soil of my imagination had subsequently become stately trees, but
+I reflected that without them no stately trees would have been produced,
+and that, consequently, only a part in the merit of these compositions
+which charmed the world--for the did charm the world--was due to myself.
+Thus, a dead fly was in my phial, poisoning all the pleasure which I
+should otherwise have derived from the result of my brain-sweat.  "How
+hard!" I would exclaim, looking up to the sky, "how hard!  I am like
+Virgil's sheep, bearing fleeces not for themselves."  But, not to tire
+you, it fared with my second work as it did with my first; I flung it
+aside, and, in order to forget it, I began a third, on which I am now
+occupied; but the difficulty of writing it is immense, my extreme desire
+to be original sadly cramping the powers of my mind; my fastidiousness
+being so great that I invariably reject whatever ideas I do not think to
+be legitimately my own.  But there is one circumstance to which I cannot
+help alluding here, as it serves to show what miseries this love of
+originality must needs bring upon an author.  I am constantly discovering
+that, however original I may wish to be, I am continually producing the
+same things which other people say or write.  Whenever, after producing
+something which gives me perfect satisfaction, and which has cost me
+perhaps days and nights of brooding, I chance to take up a book for the
+sake of a little relaxation, a book which I never saw before, I am sure
+to find in it something more or less resembling some part of what I have
+been just composing.  You will easily conceive the distress which then
+comes over me; 'tis then that I am almost tempted to execrate the chance
+which, by discovering my latent powers, induced me to adopt a profession
+of such anxiety and misery.
+
+'For some time past I have given up reading almost entirely, owing to the
+dread which I entertain of lighting upon something similar to what I
+myself have written.  I scarcely ever transgress without having almost
+instant reason to repent.  To-day, when I took up the newspaper, I saw in
+a speech of the Duke of Rhododendron, at an agricultural dinner, the very
+same ideas, and almost the same expressions which I had put into the
+mouth of an imaginary personage of mine, on a widely different occasion;
+you saw how I dashed the newspaper down--you saw how I touched the floor;
+the touch was to baffle the evil chance, to prevent the critics detecting
+any similarity between the speech of the Duke of Rhododendron at the
+agricultural dinner and the speech of my personage.  My sensibility on
+the subject of my writings is so great that sometimes a chance word is
+sufficient to unman me, I apply it to them in a superstitious sense; for
+example, when you said some time ago that the dark hour was coming on, I
+applied it to my works--it appeared to bode them evil fortune; you saw
+how I touched, it was to baffle the evil chance; but I do not confine
+myself to touching when the fear of the evil chance is upon me.  To
+baffle it I occasionally perform actions which must appear highly
+incomprehensible; I have been known, when riding in company with other
+people, to leave the direct road, and make a long circuit by a miry lane
+to the place to which we were going.  I have also been seen attempting to
+ride across a morass, where I had no business whatever, and in which my
+horse finally sank up to its saddle-girths, and was only extricated by
+the help of a multitude of hands.  I have, of course, frequently been
+asked the reason of such conduct, to which I have invariably returned no
+answer, for I scorn duplicity; whereupon people have looked mysteriously,
+and sometimes put their fingers to their foreheads.  "And yet it can't
+be," I once heard an old gentleman say; "don't we know what he is capable
+of?" and the old man was right; I merely did these things to avoid the
+evil chance, impelled by the strange feeling within me; and this evil
+chance is invariably connected with my writings, the only things at
+present which render life valuable to me.  If I touch various objects,
+and ride into miry places, it is to baffle any mischance befalling me as
+an author, to prevent my books getting into disrepute; in nine cases out
+of ten to prevent any expressions, thoughts, or situations in any work
+which I am writing from resembling the thoughts, expressions, and
+situations of other authors, for my great wish, as I told you before, is
+to be original.
+
+'I have now related my history, and have revealed to you the secrets of
+my inmost bosom.  I should certainly not have spoken so unreservedly as I
+have done, had I not discovered in you a kindred spirit.  I have long
+wished for an opportunity of discoursing on the point which forms the
+peculiar feature of my history with a being who could understand me; and
+truly it was a lucky chance which brought you to these parts; you who
+seem to be acquainted with all things strange and singular, and who are
+as well acquainted with the subject of the magic touch as with all that
+relates to the star Jupiter or the mysterious tree at Upsal.'
+
+Such was the story which my host related to me in the library, amidst the
+darkness, occasionally broken by flashes of lightning.  Both of us
+remained silent for some time after it was concluded.
+
+'It is a singular story,' said I, at last, 'though I confess that I was
+prepared for some part of it.  Will you permit me to ask you a question?'
+
+'Certainly,' said my host.
+
+'Did you never speak in public?' said I.
+
+'Never.'
+
+'And when you made this speech of yours in the dining-room, commencing
+with Mr. Speaker, no one was present?'
+
+'None in the world, I double-locked the door; what do you mean?'
+
+'An idea came into my head--dear me how the rain is pouring--but, with
+respect to your present troubles and anxieties, would it not be wise,
+seeing that authorship causes you so much trouble and anxiety, to give it
+up altogether?'
+
+'Were you an author yourself,' replied my host, 'you would not talk in
+this manner; once an author, ever an author--besides, what could I do?
+return to my former state of vegetation? no, much as I endure, I do not
+wish that; besides, every now and then my reason tells me that these
+troubles and anxieties of mine are utterly without foundation that
+whatever I write is the legitimate growth of my own mind, and that it is
+the height of folly to afflict myself at any chance resemblance between
+my own thoughts and those of other writers, such resemblance being
+inevitable from the fact of our common human origin.  In short--'
+
+'I understand you,' said I; 'notwithstanding your troubles and anxieties
+you find life very tolerable; has your originality ever been called in
+question?'
+
+'On the contrary, every one declares that originality constitutes the
+most remarkable feature of my writings; the man has some faults, they
+say, but want of originality is certainly not one of them.  He is quite
+different from others--a certain newspaper, it is true, the ---- I think,
+once insinuated that in a certain work of mine I had taken a hint or two
+from the writings of a couple of authors which it mentioned; it happened,
+however, that I had never even read one syllable of the writings of
+either, and of one of them had never even heard the name; so much for the
+discrimination of the ---.  By the bye, what a rascally newspaper that
+is!'
+
+'A very rascally newspaper,' said I.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXVII
+
+
+Disturbed slumbers--The bed-post--Two wizards--What can I do?--Real
+library--The Rev. Mr. Platitude--Toleration to Dissenters--Paradox--Sword
+of St. Peter--Enemy to humbug--High principles--False concord--The
+damsel--What religion?--Further conversation--That would never do!--May
+you prosper.
+
+During the greater part of that night my slumbers were disturbed by
+strange dreams.  Amongst other things, I fancied that I was my host; my
+head appeared to be teeming with wild thoughts and imaginations, out of
+which I was endeavouring to frame a book.  And now the book was finished
+and given to the world, and the world shouted; and all eyes were turned
+upon me, and I shrank from the eyes of the world.  And, when I got into
+retired places, I touched various objects in order to baffle the evil
+chance.  In short, during the whole night, I was acting over the story
+which I had heard before I went to bed.
+
+At about eight o'clock I awoke.  The storm had long since passed away,
+and the morning was bright and shining; my couch was so soft and
+luxurious that I felt loth to quit it, so I lay some time, my eyes
+wandering about the magnificent room to which fortune had conducted me in
+so singular a manner; at last I heaved a sigh; I was thinking of my own
+homeless condition, and imagining where I should find myself on the
+following morning.  Unwilling, however, to indulge in melancholy
+thoughts, I sprang out of bed and proceeded to dress myself, and, whilst
+dressing, I felt an irresistible inclination to touch the bed-post.
+
+I finished dressing and left the room, feeling compelled, however, as I
+left it, to touch the lintel of the door.  Is it possible, thought I,
+that from what I have lately heard the long-forgotten influence should
+have possessed me again? but I will not give way to it; so I hurried
+downstairs, resisting as I went a certain inclination which I
+occasionally felt to touch the rail of the banister.  I was presently
+upon the gravel walk before the house: it was indeed a glorious morning.
+I stood for some time observing the golden fish disporting in the waters
+of the pond, and then strolled about amongst the noble trees of the park;
+the beauty and freshness of the morning--for the air had been
+considerably cooled by the late storm--soon enabled me to cast away the
+gloomy ideas which had previously taken possession of my mind, and, after
+a stroll of about half an hour, I returned towards the house in high
+spirits.  It is true that once I felt very much inclined to go and touch
+the leaves of a flowery shrub which I saw at some distance, and had even
+moved two or three paces towards it; but, bethinking myself, I manfully
+resisted the temptation.  'Begone!' I exclaimed, 'ye sorceries, in which
+I formerly trusted--begone for ever vagaries which I had almost
+forgotten; good luck is not to be obtained, or bad averted, by magic
+touches; besides, two wizards in one parish would be too much, in all
+conscience.'
+
+I returned to the house, and entered the library; breakfast was laid on
+the table, and my friend was standing before the portrait which I have
+already said hung above the mantelpiece; so intently was he occupied in
+gazing at it that he did not hear me enter, nor was aware of my presence
+till I advanced close to him and spoke, when he turned round and shook me
+by the hand.
+
+'What can possibly have induced you to hang up that portrait in your
+library? it is a staring likeness, it is true, but it appears to me a
+wretched daub.'
+
+'Daub as you call it,' said my friend, smiling, 'I would not part with it
+for the best piece of Rafael.  For many a happy thought I am indebted to
+that picture--it is my principal source of inspiration; when my
+imagination flags, as of course it occasionally does, I stare upon those
+features, and forthwith strange ideas of fun and drollery begin to flow
+into my mind; these I round, amplify, or combine into goodly creations,
+and bring forth as I find an opportunity.  It is true that I am
+occasionally tormented by the thought that, by doing this, I am
+committing plagiarism; though, in that case, all thoughts must be
+plagiarisms, all that we think being the result of what we hear, see, or
+feel.  What can I do?  I must derive my thoughts from some source or
+other; and, after all, it is better to plagiarise from the features of my
+landlord than from the works of Butler and Cervantes.  My works, as you
+are aware, are of a serio-comic character.  My neighbours are of opinion
+that I am a great reader, and so I am, but only of those features--my
+real library is that picture.'
+
+'But how did you obtain it?' said I.
+
+'Some years ago a travelling painter came into this neighbourhood, and my
+jolly host, at the request of his wife, consented to sit for his
+portrait; she highly admired the picture, but she soon died, and then my
+fat friend, who is of an affectionate disposition, said he could not bear
+the sight of it, as it put him in mind of his poor wife.  I purchased it
+of him for five pounds--I would not take five thousand for it; when you
+called that picture a daub, you did not see all the poetry of it.'
+
+We sat down to breakfast; my entertainer appeared to be in much better
+spirits than on the preceding day; I did not observe him touch once; ere
+breakfast was over a servant entered--'The Reverend Mr. Platitude, sir,'
+said he.
+
+A shade of dissatisfaction came over the countenance of my host.  'What
+does the silly pestilent fellow mean by coming here?' said he, half to
+himself; 'let him come in,' said he to the servant.
+
+The servant went out, and in a moment reappeared, introducing the
+Reverend Mr. Platitude.  The Reverend Mr. Platitude, having what is
+vulgarly called a game leg, came shambling into the room; he was about
+thirty years of age, and about five feet three inches high; his face was
+of the colour of pepper, and nearly as rugged as a nutmeg-grater; his
+hair was black; with his eyes he squinted, and grinned with his lips,
+which were very much apart, disclosing two very irregular rows of teeth;
+he was dressed in the true Levitical fashion, in a suit of spotless
+black, and a neckerchief of spotless white.
+
+The Reverend Mr. Platitude advanced winking and grinning to my
+entertainer, who received him politely but with evident coldness; nothing
+daunted, however, the Reverend Mr. Platitude took a seat by the table,
+and, being asked to take a cup of coffee, winked, grinned, and consented.
+
+In company I am occasionally subject to fits of what is generally called
+absence; my mind takes flight and returns to former scenes, or presses
+forward into the future.  One of these fits of absence came over me at
+this time--I looked at the Reverend Mr. Platitude for a moment, heard a
+word or two that proceeded from his mouth, and saying to myself, 'You are
+no man for me,' fell into a fit of musing--into the same train of thought
+as in the morning, no very pleasant one--I was thinking of the future.
+
+I continued in my reverie for some time, and probably should have
+continued longer, had I not been suddenly aroused by the voice of Mr.
+Platitude raised to a very high key.  'Yes, my dear sir,' said he, 'it is
+but too true; I have it on good authority--a gone church--a lost church--a
+ruined church--a demolished church is the Church of England.  Toleration
+to Dissenters!--oh, monstrous!'
+
+'I suppose,' said my host, 'that the repeal of the Test Acts will be
+merely a precursor of the emancipation of the Papists?'
+
+'Of the Catholics,' said the Reverend Mr. Platitude.  'Ahem.  There was a
+time, as I believe you are aware, my dear sir, when I was as much opposed
+to the emancipation of the Catholics as it was possible for any one to
+be; but I was prejudiced, my dear sir, labouring under a cloud of most
+unfortunate prejudice; but I thank my Maker I am so no longer.  I have
+travelled, as you are aware.  It is only by travelling that one can rub
+off prejudices; I think you will agree with me there.  I am speaking to a
+traveller.  I left behind all my prejudices in Italy.  The Catholics are
+at least our fellow-Christians.  I thank Heaven that I am no longer an
+enemy to Catholic emancipation.'
+
+'And yet you would not tolerate Dissenters?'
+
+'Dissenters, my dear sir; I hope you would not class such a set as the
+Dissenters with Catholics?'
+
+'Perhaps it would be unjust,' said my host, 'though to which of the two
+parties is another thing; but permit me to ask you a question: Does it
+not smack somewhat of paradox to talk of Catholics, whilst you admit
+there are Dissenters?  If there are Dissenters, how should there be
+Catholics?'
+
+'It is not my fault that there are Dissenters,' said the Reverend Mr.
+Platitude; 'if I had my will I would neither admit there were any, nor
+permit any to be.'
+
+'Of course you would admit there were such as long as they existed; but
+how would you get rid of them?'
+
+'I would have the Church exert its authority.'
+
+'What do you mean by exerting its authority?'
+
+'I would not have the Church bear the sword in vain.'
+
+'What, the sword of St. Peter?  You remember what the founder of the
+religion which you profess said about the sword, "He who striketh with it
+. . . "  I think those who have called themselves the Church have had
+enough of the sword.  Two can play with the sword, Mr. Platitude.  The
+Church of Rome tried the sword with the Lutherans: how did it fare with
+the Church of Rome?  The Church of England tried the sword, Mr.
+Platitude, with the Puritans: how did it fare with Laud and Charles?'
+
+'Oh, as for the Church of England,' said Mr. Platitude, 'I have little to
+say.  Thank God, I left all my Church of England prejudices in Italy.  Had
+the Church of England known its true interests, it would long ago have
+sought a reconciliation with its illustrious mother.  If the Church of
+England had not been in some degree a schismatic church, it would not
+have fared so ill at the time of which you are speaking; the rest of the
+Church would have come to its assistance.  The Irish would have helped
+it, so would the French, so would the Portuguese.  Disunion has always
+been the bane of the Church.'
+
+Once more I fell into a reverie.  My mind now reverted to the past;
+methought I was in a small comfortable room wainscoted with oak; I was
+seated on one side of a fireplace, close by a table on which were wine
+and fruit; on the other side of the fire sat a man in a plain suit of
+brown, with the hair combed back from his somewhat high forehead; he had
+a pipe in his mouth, which for some time he smoked gravely and placidly,
+without saying a word; at length, after drawing at the pipe for some time
+rather vigorously, he removed it from his mouth, and, emitting an
+accumulated cloud of smoke, he exclaimed in a slow and measured tone, 'As
+I was telling you just now, my good chap, I have always been an enemy to
+humbug.'
+
+When I awoke from my reverie the Reverend Mr. Platitude was quitting the
+apartment.
+
+'Who is that person?' said I to my entertainer, as the door closed behind
+him.
+
+'Who is he?' said my host; 'why, the Reverend Mr. Platitude.'
+
+'Does he reside in this neighbourhood?'
+
+'He holds a living about three miles from here; his history, as far as I
+am acquainted with it, is as follows.  His father was a respectable
+tanner in the neighbouring town, who, wishing to make his son a
+gentleman, sent him to college.  Having never been at college myself, I
+cannot say whether he took the wisest course; I believe it is more easy
+to unmake than to make a gentleman; I have known many gentlemanly youths
+go to college, and return anything but what they went.  Young Mr.
+Platitude did not go to college a gentleman, but neither did he return
+one: he went to college an ass, and returned a prig; to his original
+folly was superadded a vast quantity of conceit.  He told his father that
+he had adopted high principles, and was determined to discountenance
+everything low and mean; advised him to eschew trade, and to purchase him
+a living.  The old man retired from business, purchased his son a living,
+and shortly after died, leaving him what remained of his fortune.  The
+first thing the Reverend Mr. Platitude did, after his father's decease,
+was to send his mother and sister into Wales to live upon a small
+annuity, assigning as a reason that he was averse to anything low, and
+that they talked ungrammatically.  Wishing to shine in the pulpit, he now
+preached high sermons, as he called them, interspersed with scraps of
+learning.  His sermons did not, however, procure him much popularity; on
+the contrary, his church soon became nearly deserted, the greater part of
+his flock going over to certain dissenting preachers, who had shortly
+before made their appearance in the neighbourhood.  Mr. Platitude was
+filled with wrath, and abused Dissenters in most unmeasured terms.  Coming
+in contact with some of the preachers at a public meeting, he was rash
+enough to enter into argument with them.  Poor Platitude! he had better
+have been quiet, he appeared like a child, a very infant, in their grasp;
+he attempted to take shelter under his college learning, but found, to
+his dismay, that his opponents knew more Greek and Latin than himself.
+These illiterate boors, as he had supposed them, caught him at once in a
+false concord, and Mr. Platitude had to slink home overwhelmed with
+shame.  To avenge himself he applied to the ecclesiastical court, but was
+told that the Dissenters could not be put down by the present
+ecclesiastical law.  He found the Church of England, to use his own
+expression, a poor, powerless, restricted Church.  He now thought to
+improve his consequence by marriage, and made up to a rich and beautiful
+young lady in the neighbourhood; the damsel measured him from head to
+foot with a pair of very sharp eyes, dropped a curtsey, and refused him.
+Mr. Platitude, finding England a very stupid place, determined to travel;
+he went to Italy; how he passed his time there he knows best, to other
+people it is a matter of little importance.  At the end of two years he
+returned with a real or assumed contempt for everything English, and
+especially for the Church to which he belongs, and out of which he is
+supported.  He forthwith gave out that he had left behind him all his
+Church of England prejudices, and, as a proof thereof, spoke against
+sacerdotal wedlock and the toleration of schismatics.  In an evil hour
+for myself he was introduced to me by a clergyman of my acquaintance, and
+from that time I have been pestered, as I was this morning, at least once
+a week.  I seldom enter into any discussion with him, but fix my eyes on
+the portrait over the mantelpiece, and endeavour to conjure up some comic
+idea or situation, whilst he goes on talking tomfoolery by the hour about
+Church authority, schismatics, and the unlawfulness of sacerdotal
+wedlock; occasionally he brings with him a strange kind of being, whose
+acquaintance he says he made in Italy; I believe he is some sharking
+priest who has come over to proselytise and plunder.  This being has some
+powers of conversation and some learning, but carries the countenance of
+an arch villain; Platitude is evidently his tool.'
+
+'Of what religion are you?' said I to my host.
+
+'That of the Vicar of Wakefield--good, quiet, Church of England, which
+would live and let live, practises charity, and rails at no one; where
+the priest is the husband of one wife, takes care of his family and his
+parish--such is the religion for me, though I confess I have hitherto
+thought too little of religious matters.  When, however, I have completed
+this plaguy work on which I am engaged, I hope to be able to devote more
+attention to them.'
+
+After some further conversation, the subjects being, if I remember right,
+college education, priggism, church authority, tomfoolery, and the like,
+I rose and said to my host, 'I must now leave you.'
+
+'Whither are you going?'
+
+'I do not know.'
+
+'Stay here, then--you shall be welcome as many days, months, and years as
+you please to stay.'
+
+'Do you think I would hang upon another man?  No, not if he were Emperor
+of all the Chinas.  I will now make my preparations, and then bid you
+farewell.'
+
+I retired to my apartment and collected the handful of things which I
+carried with me on my travels.
+
+'I will walk a little way with you,' said my friend on my return.
+
+He walked with me to the park gate; neither of us said anything by the
+way.  When we had come upon the road, I said, 'Farewell now; I will not
+permit you to give yourself any further trouble on my account.  Receive
+my best thanks for your kindness; before we part, however, I should wish
+to ask you a question.  Do you think you shall ever grow tired of
+authorship?'
+
+'I have my fears,' said my friend, advancing his hand to one of the iron
+bars of the gate.
+
+'Don't touch,' said I, 'it is a bad habit.  I have but one word to add:
+should you ever grow tired of authorship follow your first idea of
+getting into Parliament; you have words enough at command; perhaps you
+want manner and method; but, in that case, you must apply to a teacher,
+you must take lessons of a master of elocution.'
+
+'That would never do!' said my host; 'I know myself too well to think of
+applying for assistance to any one.  Were I to become a parliamentary
+orator, I should wish to be an original one, even if not above
+mediocrity.  What pleasure should I take in any speech I might make,
+however original as to thought, provided the gestures I employed and the
+very modulation of my voice were not my own?  Take lessons, indeed! why,
+the fellow who taught me, the professor, might be standing in the gallery
+whilst I spoke; and, at the best parts of my speech, might say to
+himself, "That gesture is mine--that modulation is mine."  I could not
+bear the thought of such a thing.'
+
+'Farewell,' said I, 'and may you prosper.  I have nothing more to say.'
+
+I departed.  At the distance of twenty yards I turned round suddenly; my
+friend was just withdrawing his finger from the bar of the gate.
+
+{picture:My friend was just withdrawing his finger from the bar of the
+gate: page369.jpg}
+
+'He has been touching,' said I, as I proceeded on my way; 'I wonder what
+was the evil chance he wished to baffle.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXVIII
+
+
+Elastic step--Disconsolate party--Not the season--Mend your draught--Good
+ale--Crotchet--Hammer and tongs--Schoolmaster--True Eden life--Flaming
+Tinman--Twice my size--Hard at work--My poor wife--Grey Moll--A
+Bible--Half-and-half--What to do--Half inclined--In no time--On one
+condition--Don't stare--Like the wind.
+
+After walking some time, I found myself on the great road, at the same
+spot where I had turned aside the day before with my new-made
+acquaintance, in the direction of his house.  I now continued my journey
+as before, towards the north.  The weather, though beautiful, was much
+cooler than it had been for some time past; I walked at a great rate,
+with a springing and elastic step.  In about two hours I came to where a
+kind of cottage stood a little way back from the road, with a huge oak
+before it, under the shade of which stood a little pony and a cart, which
+seemed to contain various articles.  I was going past--when I saw
+scrawled over the door of the cottage, 'Good beer sold here'; upon which,
+feeling myself all of a sudden very thirsty, I determined to go in and
+taste the beverage.
+
+{picture:I was going past--when I saw scrawled over the door of the
+cottage, 'Good beer sold here.': page371.jpg}
+
+I entered a well-sanded kitchen, and seated myself on a bench, on one
+side of a long white table; the other side, which was nearest to the
+wall, was occupied by a party, or rather family, consisting of a grimy-
+looking man, somewhat under the middle size, dressed in faded velveteens,
+and wearing a leather apron--a rather pretty-looking woman, but
+sun-burnt, and meanly dressed, and two ragged children, a boy and girl,
+about four or five years old.  The man sat with his eyes fixed upon the
+table, supporting his chin with both his hands; the woman, who was next
+him, sat quite still, save that occasionally she turned a glance upon her
+husband with eyes that appeared to have been lately crying.  The children
+had none of the vivacity so general at their age.  A more disconsolate
+family I had never seen; a mug, which, when filled, might contain half a
+pint, stood empty before them; a very disconsolate party indeed.
+
+'House!' said I; 'House!' and then, as nobody appeared, I cried again as
+loud as I could, 'House! do you hear me, House!'
+
+'What's your pleasure, young man?' said an elderly woman, who now made
+her appearance from a side apartment.
+
+'To taste your ale,' said I.
+
+'How much?' said the woman, stretching out her hand towards the empty mug
+upon the table.
+
+'The largest measure-full in your house,' said I, putting back her hand
+gently.  'This is not the season for half-pint mugs.'
+
+'As you will, young man,' said the landlady; and presently brought in an
+earthen pitcher which might contain about three pints, and which foamed
+and frothed withal.
+
+'Will this pay for it?' said I, putting down sixpence.
+
+{picture:'Will this pay for it?' said I, putting down sixpence:
+page373.jpg}
+
+'I have to return you a penny,' said the landlady, putting her hand into
+her pocket.
+
+'I want no change,' said I, flourishing my hand with an air.
+
+'As you please, young gentleman,' said the landlady, and then, making a
+kind of curtsey, she again retired to the side apartment.
+
+'Here is your health, sir,' said I to the grimy-looking man, as I raised
+the pitcher to my lips.
+
+The tinker, for such I supposed him to be, without altering his posture,
+raised his eyes, looked at me for a moment, gave a slight nod, and then
+once more fixed his eyes upon the table.  I took a draught of the ale,
+which I found excellent; 'Won't you drink?' said I, holding the pitcher
+to the tinker.
+
+The man again lifted up his eyes, looked at me, and then at the pitcher,
+and then at me again.  I thought at one time that he was about to shake
+his head in sign of refusal; but no, he looked once more at the pitcher,
+and the temptation was too strong.  Slowly removing his head from his
+arms, he took the pitcher, sighed, nodded, and drank a tolerable
+quantity, and then set the pitcher down before me upon the table.
+
+'You had better mend your draught,' said I to the tinker; 'it is a sad
+heart that never rejoices.'
+
+'That's true,' said the tinker, and again raising the pitcher to his
+lips, he mended his draught as I had bidden him, drinking a larger
+quantity than before.
+
+'Pass it to your wife,' said I.
+
+The poor woman took the pitcher from the man's hand; before, however,
+raising it to her lips, she looked at the children.  True mother's heart,
+thought I to myself, and taking the half-pint mug, I made her fill it,
+and then held it to the children, causing each to take a draught.  The
+woman wiped her eyes with the corner of her gown, before she raised the
+pitcher and drank to my health.
+
+In about five minutes none of the family looked half so disconsolate as
+before, and the tinker and I were in deep discourse.
+
+Oh, genial and gladdening is the power of good ale, the true and proper
+drink of Englishmen.  He is not deserving of the name of Englishman who
+speaketh against ale, that is good ale, like that which has just made
+merry the hearts of this poor family; and yet there are beings, calling
+themselves Englishmen, who say that it is a sin to drink a cup of ale,
+and who, on coming to this passage will be tempted to fling down the book
+and exclaim, 'The man is evidently a bad man, for behold, by his own
+confession, he is not only fond of ale himself, but is in the habit of
+tempting other people with it.'  Alas! alas! what a number of silly
+individuals there are in this world; I wonder what they would have had me
+do in this instance--given the afflicted family a cup of cold water? go
+to!  They could have found water in the road, for there was a pellucid
+spring only a few yards distant from the house, as they were well
+aware--but they wanted not water; what should I have given them? meat and
+bread? go to!  They were not hungry; there was stifled sobbing in their
+bosoms, and the first mouthful of strong meat would have choked them.
+What should I have given them?  Money! what right had I to insult them by
+offering them money?  Advice! words, words, words; friends, there is a
+time for everything; there is a time for a cup of cold water; there is a
+time for strong meat and bread; there is a time for advice, and there is
+a time for ale; and I have generally found that the time for advice is
+after a cup of ale.  I do not say many cups; the tongue then speaketh
+more smoothly, and the ear listeneth more benignantly; but why do I
+attempt to reason with you? do I not know you for conceited creatures,
+with one idea--and that a foolish one;--a crotchet, for the sake of which
+ye would sacrifice anything, religion if required--country?  There, fling
+down my book, I do not wish ye to walk any farther in my company, unless
+you cast your nonsense away, which ye will never do, for it is the breath
+of your nostrils; fling down my book, it was not written to support a
+crotchet, for know one thing, my good people, I have invariably been an
+enemy to humbug.
+
+'Well,' said the tinker, after we had discoursed some time, 'little
+thought, when I first saw you, that you were of my own trade.'
+
+_Myself_.  Nor am I, at least not exactly.  There is not much difference,
+'tis true, between a tinker and a smith.
+
+_Tinker_.  You are a whitesmith then?
+
+_Myself_.  Not I, I'd scorn to be anything so mean; no, friend, black's
+the colour; I am a brother of the horse-shoe.  Success to the hammer and
+tongs.
+
+_Tinker_.  Well, I shouldn't have thought you had been a blacksmith by
+your hands.
+
+_Myself_.  I have seen them, however, as black as yours.  The truth is, I
+have not worked for many a day.
+
+_Tinker_.  Where did you serve first?
+
+_Myself_.  In Ireland.
+
+_Tinker_. That's a good way off, isn't it?
+
+_Myself_.  Not very far; over those mountains to the left, and the run of
+salt water that lies behind them, there's Ireland.
+
+_Tinker_.  It's a fine thing to be a scholar.
+
+_Myself_.  Not half so fine as to be a tinker.
+
+_Tinker_.  How you talk!
+
+_Myself_.  Nothing but the truth; what can be better than to be one's own
+master?  Now a tinker is his own master, a scholar is not.  Let us
+suppose the best of scholars, a schoolmaster for example, for I suppose
+you will admit that no one can be higher in scholarship than a
+schoolmaster; do you call his a pleasant life?  I don't; we should call
+him a school-slave, rather than a schoolmaster.  Only conceive him in
+blessed weather like this, in his close school, teaching children to
+write in copy-books, 'Evil communication corrupts good manners,' or 'You
+cannot touch pitch without defilement,' or to spell out of Abedariums, or
+to read out of Jack Smith, or Sandford and Merton.  Only conceive him, I
+say, drudging in such guise from morning till night, without any rational
+enjoyment but to beat the children.  Would you compare such a dog's life
+as that with your own--the happiest under heaven--true Eden life, as the
+Germans would say,--pitching your tent under the pleasant hedgerows,
+listening to the song of the feathered tribes, collecting all the leaky
+kettles in the neighbourhood, soldering and joining, earning your honest
+bread by the wholesome sweat of your brow--making ten holes--hey, what's
+this? what's the man crying for?
+
+Suddenly the tinker had covered his face with his hands, and begun to sob
+and moan like a man in the deepest distress; the breast of his wife was
+heaved with emotion; even the children were agitated, the youngest began
+to roar.
+
+_Myself_.  What's the matter with you; what are you all crying about?
+
+_Tinker_ (uncovering his face).  Lord, why to hear you talk; isn't that
+enough to make anybody cry--even the poor babes?  Yes, you said right,
+'tis life in the garden of Eden--the tinker's; I see so now that I'm
+about to give it up.
+
+_Myself_.  Give it up! you must not think of such a thing.
+
+_Tinker_.  No, I can't bear to think of it, and yet I must; what's to be
+done?  How hard to be frightened to death, to be driven off the roads.
+
+_Myself_.  Who has driven you off the roads?
+
+_Tinker_.  Who! the Flaming Tinman.
+
+_Myself_.  Who is he?
+
+_Tinker_.  The biggest rogue in England, and the cruellest, or he
+wouldn't have served me as he has done--I'll tell you all about it.  I
+was born upon the roads, and so was my father before me, and my mother
+too; and I worked with them as long as they lived, as a dutiful child,
+for I have nothing to reproach myself with on their account; and when my
+father died I took up the business, and went his beat, and supported my
+mother for the little time she lived; and when she died I married this
+young woman, who was not born upon the roads, but was a small tradesman's
+daughter, at Gloster.  She had a kindness for me, and, notwithstanding
+her friends were against the match, she married the poor tinker, and came
+to live with him upon the roads.  Well, young man, for six or seven years
+I--as the happiest fellow breathing, living just the life you described
+just now--respected by everybody in this beat; when in an evil hour comes
+this Black Jack, this flaming tinman, into these parts, driven as they
+say out of Yorkshire--for no good you may be sure.  Now there is no beat
+will support two tinkers, as you doubtless know; mine was a good one, but
+it would not support the flying tinker and myself, though if it would
+have supported twenty it would have been all the same to the flying
+villain, who'll brook no one but himself; so he presently finds me out,
+and offers to fight me for the beat.  Now, being bred upon the roads, I
+can fight a little, that is with anything like my match, but I was not
+going to fight him, who happens to be twice my size, and so I told him;
+whereupon he knocks me down, and would have done me farther mischief had
+not some men been nigh and prevented him; so he threatened to cut my
+throat, and went his way.  Well, I did not like such usage at all, and
+was woundily frightened, and tried to keep as much out of his way as
+possible, going anywhere but where I thought I was likely to meet him;
+and sure enough for several months I contrived to keep out of his way.  At
+last somebody told me that he was gone back to Yorkshire, whereupon I was
+glad at heart, and ventured to show myself, going here and there as I did
+before.  Well, young man, it was yesterday that I and mine set ourselves
+down in a lane, about five miles from here, and lighted our fire, and had
+our dinner, and after dinner I sat down to mend three kettles and a
+frying pan which the people in the neighbourhood had given me to
+mend--for, as I told you before, I have a good connection, owing to my
+honesty.  Well, as I sat there hard at work, happy as the day's long, and
+thinking of anything but what was to happen, who should come up but this
+Black Jack, this king of the tinkers, rattling along in his cart, with
+his wife, that they call Grey Moll, by his side--for the villain has got
+a wife, and a maid-servant too; the last I never saw, but they that has,
+says that she is as big as a house, and young, and well to look at, which
+can't be all said of Moll, who, though she's big enough in all
+conscience, is neither young nor handsome.  Well, no sooner does he see
+me and mine, than, giving the reins to Grey Moll, he springs out of his
+cart, and comes straight at me; not a word did he say, but on he comes
+straight at me like a wild bull.  I am a quiet man, young fellow, but I
+saw now that quietness would be of no use, so I sprang up upon my legs,
+and being bred upon the roads, and able to fight a little, I squared as
+he came running in upon me, and had a round or two with him.  Lord bless
+you, young man, it was like a fly fighting with an elephant--one of those
+big beasts the show-folks carry about.  I had not a chance with the
+fellow, he knocked me here, he knocked me there, knocked me into the
+hedge, and knocked me out again.  I was at my last shifts, and my poor
+wife saw it.  Now my poor wife, though she is as gentle as a pigeon, has
+yet a spirit of her own, and though she wasn't bred upon the roads, can
+scratch a little; so when she saw me at my last shifts, she flew at the
+villain--she couldn't bear to see her partner murdered--and scratched the
+villain's face.  Lord bless you, young man, she had better have been
+quiet: Grey Moll no sooner saw what she was about, than, springing out of
+the cart, where she had sat all along perfectly quiet, save a little
+whooping and screeching to encourage her blade:--Grey Moll, I say (my
+flesh creeps when I think of it--for I am a kind husband, and love my
+poor wife) . . .
+
+_Myself_.  Take another draught of the ale; you look frightened, and it
+will do you good.  Stout liquor makes stout heart, as the man says in the
+play.
+
+_Tinker_.  That's true, young man; here's to you--where was I?  Grey Moll
+no sooner saw what my wife was about, than, springing out of the cart,
+she flew at my poor wife, clawed off her bonnet in a moment, and seized
+hold of her hair.  Lord bless you, young man, my poor wife, in the hands
+of Grey Moll, was nothing better than a pigeon in the claws of a buzzard
+hawk, or I in the hands of the Flaming Tinman, which when I saw, my heart
+was fit to burst, and I determined to give up everything--everything to
+save my poor wife out of Grey Moll's claws.  'Hold!' I shouted.  'Hold,
+both of you--Jack, Moll.  Hold, both of you, for God's sake, and I'll do
+what you will: give up trade, and business, connection, bread, and
+everything, never more travel the roads, and go down on my knees to you
+in the bargain.'  Well, this had some effect; Moll let go my wife, and
+the Blazing Tinman stopped for a moment; it was only for a moment,
+however, that he left off--all of a sudden he hit me a blow which sent me
+against a tree; and what did the villain then? why the flying villain
+seized me by the throat, and almost throttled me, roaring--what do you
+think, young man, that the flaming villain roared out?
+
+_Myself_.  I really don't know--something horrible, I suppose.
+
+_Tinker_.  Horrible, indeed; you may well say horrible, young man;
+neither more nor less than the Bible--'A Bible, a Bible!' roared the
+Blazing Tinman; and he pressed my throat so hard against the tree that my
+senses began to dwaul away--a Bible, a Bible, still ringing in my ears.
+Now, young man, my poor wife is a Christian woman, and, though she
+travels the roads, carries a Bible with her at the bottom of her sack,
+with which sometimes she teaches the children to read--it was the only
+thing she brought with her from the place of her kith and kin, save her
+own body and the clothes on her back; so my poor wife, half distracted,
+runs to her sack, pulls out the Bible, and puts it into the hand of the
+Blazing Tinman, who then thrusts the end of it into my mouth with such
+fury that it made my lips bleed, and broke short one of my teeth which
+happened to be decayed.  'Swear,' said he, 'swear, you mumping villain,
+take your Bible oath that you will quit and give up the beat altogether,
+or I'll--and then the hard-hearted villain made me swear by the Bible,
+and my own damnation, half-throttled as I was, to--to--I can't go on--
+
+_Myself_.  Take another draught--stout liquor--
+
+_Tinker_.  I can't, young man, my heart's too full, and what's more, the
+pitcher is empty.
+
+_Myself_.  And so he swore you, I suppose, on the Bible, to quit the
+roads?
+
+_Tinker_.  You are right, he did so, the gypsy villain.
+
+_Myself_.  Gypsy!  Is he a gypsy?
+
+_Tinker_.  Not exactly; what they call a half-and-half.  His father was a
+gypsy, and his mother, like mine, one who walked the roads.
+
+_Myself_.  Is he of the Smiths--the Petulengres?
+
+_Tinker_.  I say, young man, you know a thing or two; one would think, to
+hear you talk, you had been bred upon the roads.  I thought none but
+those bred upon the roads knew anything of that name--Petulengres!  No,
+not he, he fights the Petulengres whenever he meets them; he likes nobody
+but himself, and wants to be king of the roads.  I believe he is a Boss,
+or a--at any rate he's a bad one, as I know to my cost.
+
+_Myself_.  And what are you going to do?
+
+_Tinker_.  Do! you may well ask that; I don't know what to do.  My poor
+wife and I have been talking of that all the morning, over that half-pint
+mug of beer; we can't determine on what's to be done.  All we know is,
+that we must quit the roads.  The villain swore that the next time he saw
+us on the roads he'd cut all our throats, and seize our horse and bit of
+a cart that are now standing out there under the tree.
+
+_Myself_.  And what do you mean to do with your horse and cart?
+
+_Tinker_.  Another question!  What shall we do with our cart and pony?
+they are of no use to us now.  Stay on the roads I will not, both for my
+oath's sake and my own.  If we had a trifle of money, we were thinking of
+going to Bristol, where I might get up a little business, but we have
+none; our last three farthings we spent about the mug of beer.
+
+_Myself_.  But why don't you sell your horse and cart?
+
+_Tinker_.  Sell them! and who would buy them, unless some one who wished
+to set up in my line; but there's no beat, and what's the use of the
+horse and cart and the few tools without the beat?
+
+_Myself_.  I'm half inclined to buy your cart and pony, and your beat
+too.
+
+_Tinker_.  You!  How came you to think of such a thing?
+
+_Myself_.  Why, like yourself, I hardly know what to do.  I want a home
+and work.  As for a home, I suppose I can contrive to make a home out of
+your tent and cart; and as for work, I must learn to be a tinker, it
+would not be hard for one of my trade to learn to tinker; what better can
+I do?  Would you have me go to Chester and work there now?  I don't like
+the thoughts of it.  If I go to Chester and work there, I can't be my own
+man; I must work under a master, and perhaps he and I should quarrel, and
+when I quarrel I am apt to hit folks, and those that hit folks are
+sometimes sent to prison; I don't like the thought either of going to
+Chester or to Chester prison.  What do you think I could earn at Chester?
+
+_Tinker_.  A matter of eleven shillings a week, if anybody would employ
+you, which I don't think they would with those hands of yours.  But
+whether they would or not, if you are of a quarrelsome nature you must
+not go to Chester; you would be in the castle in no time.  I don't know
+how to advise you.  As for selling you my stock, I'd see you farther
+first, for your own sake.
+
+_Myself_.  Why?
+
+_Tinker_.  Why! you would get your head knocked off.  Suppose you were to
+meet him?
+
+_Myself_.  Pooh, don't be afraid on my account; if I were to meet him I
+could easily manage him one way or other.  I know all kinds of strange
+words and names, and, as I told you before, I sometimes hit people when
+they put me out.
+
+Here the tinker's wife, who for some minutes past had been listening
+attentively to our discourse, interposed, saying, in a low soft tone: 'I
+really don't see, John, why you shouldn't sell the young man the things,
+seeing that he wishes for them, and is so confident; you have told him
+plainly how matters stand, and if anything ill should befall him, people
+couldn't lay the blame on you; but I don't think any ill will befall him,
+and who knows but God has sent him to our assistance in time of need?'
+
+'I'll hear of no such thing,' said the tinker; 'I have drunk at the young
+man's expense, and though he says he's quarrelsome, I would not wish to
+sit in pleasanter company.  A pretty fellow I should be, now, if I were
+to let him follow his own will.  If he once sets up on my beat, he's a
+lost man, his ribs will be stove in, and his head knocked off his
+shoulders.  There, you are crying, but you shan't have your will though;
+I won't be the young man's destruction . . . If, indeed, I thought he
+could manage the tinker--but he never can; he says he can hit, but it's
+no use hitting the tinker,--crying still! you are enough to drive one
+mad.  I say, young man, I believe you understand a thing or two, just now
+you were talking of knowing hard words and names--I don't wish to send
+you to your mischief--you say you know hard words and names; let us see.
+Only on one condition I'll sell you the pony and things; as for the beat
+it's gone, isn't mine--sworn away by my own mouth.  Tell me what's my
+name; if you can't, may I--'
+
+_Myself_.  Don't swear, it's a bad habit, neither pleasant nor
+profitable.  Your name is Slingsby--Jack Slingsby.  There, don't stare,
+there's nothing in my telling you your name: I've been in these parts
+before, at least not very far from here.  Ten years ago, when I was
+little more than a child, I was about twenty miles from here in a post-
+chaise, at the door of an inn, and as I looked from the window of the
+chaise, I saw you standing by a gutter, with a big tin ladle in your
+hand, and somebody called you Jack Slingsby.  I never forget anything I
+hear or see; I can't, I wish I could.  So there's nothing strange in my
+knowing your name; indeed, there's nothing strange in anything, provided
+you examine it to the bottom.  Now what am I to give you for the things?
+
+I paid Slingsby five pounds ten shillings for his stock in trade, cart,
+and pony--purchased sundry provisions of the landlady, also a wagoner's
+frock, which had belonged to a certain son of hers, deceased, gave my
+little animal a feed of corn, and prepared to depart.
+
+'God bless you, young man,' said Slingsby, shaking me by the hand; 'you
+are the best friend I've had for many a day: I have but one thing to tell
+you, Don't cross that fellow's path if you can help it; and stay--should
+the pony refuse to go, just touch him so, and he'll fly like the wind.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXIX
+
+
+Effects of corn--One night longer--The hoofs--A stumble--Are you
+hurt?--What a difference--Drowsy--Maze of bushes--Housekeeping--Sticks
+and furze--The driftway--Account of stock--Anvil and bellows--Twenty
+years.
+
+It was two or three hours past noon when I took my departure from the
+place of the last adventure, walking by the side of my little cart; the
+pony, invigorated by the corn, to which he was probably not much
+accustomed, proceeded right gallantly; so far from having to hasten him
+forward by the particular application which the tinker had pointed out to
+me, I had rather to repress his eagerness, being, though an excellent
+pedestrian, not unfrequently left behind.  The country through which I
+passed was beautiful and interesting, but solitary; few habitations
+appeared.  As it was quite a matter of indifference to me in what
+direction I went, the whole world being before me, I allowed the pony to
+decide upon the matter; it was not long before he left the high-road,
+being probably no friend to public places.  I followed him I knew not
+whither, but, from subsequent observation, have reason to suppose that
+our course was in a north-west direction.  At length night came upon us,
+and a cold wind sprang up, which was succeeded by a drizzling rain.
+
+I had originally intended to pass the night in the cart, or to pitch my
+little tent on some convenient spot by the road's side; but, owing to the
+alteration in the weather, I thought that it would be advisable to take
+up my quarters in any hedge alehouse at which I might arrive.  To tell
+the truth, I was not very sorry to have an excuse to pass the night once
+more beneath a roof.  I had determined to live quite independent, but I
+had never before passed a night by myself abroad, and felt a little
+apprehensive at the idea; I hoped, however, on the morrow, to be a little
+more prepared for the step, so I determined for one night--only for one
+night longer--to sleep like a Christian; but human determinations are not
+always put into effect, such a thing as opportunity is frequently
+wanting, such was the case here.  I went on for a considerable time, in
+expectation of coming to some rustic hostelry, but nothing of the kind
+presented itself to my eyes; the country in which I now was seemed almost
+uninhabited, not a house of any kind was to be seen--at least I saw
+none--though it is true houses might be near without my seeing them,
+owing to the darkness of the night, for neither moon nor star was abroad.
+I heard, occasionally, the bark of dogs; but the sound appeared to come
+from an immense distance.  The rain still fell, and the ground beneath my
+feet was wet and miry; in short, it was a night in which even a tramper
+by profession would feel more comfortable in being housed than abroad.  I
+followed in the rear of the cart, the pony still proceeding at a sturdy
+pace, till methought I heard other hoofs than those of my own nag; I
+listened for a moment, and distinctly heard the sound of hoofs
+approaching at a great rate, and evidently from the quarter towards which
+I and my little caravan were moving.  We were in a dark lane--so dark
+that it was impossible for me to see my own hand.  Apprehensive that some
+accident might occur, I ran forward, and, seizing the pony by the bridle,
+drew him as near as I could to the hedge.  On came the hoofs--trot, trot,
+trot; and evidently more than those of one horse; their speed as they
+advanced appeared to slacken--it was only, however, for a moment.  I
+heard a voice cry, 'Push on,--this is a desperate robbing place,--never
+mind the dark'; and the hoofs came on quicker than before.  'Stop!' said
+I, at the top of my voice; 'stop! or--'  Before I could finish what I was
+about to say there was a stumble, a heavy fall, a cry, and a groan, and
+putting out my foot I felt what I conjectured to be the head of a horse
+stretched upon the road.  'Lord have mercy upon us! what's the matter?'
+exclaimed a voice.  'Spare my life,' cried another voice, apparently from
+the ground; 'only spare my life, and take all I have.'  'Where are you,
+Master Wise?' cried the other voice.  'Help! here, Master Bat,' cried the
+voice from the ground; 'help me up or I shall be murdered.'  'Why, what's
+the matter?' said Bat.  'Some one has knocked me down, and is robbing
+me,' said the voice from the ground.  'Help! murder!' cried Bat; and,
+regardless of the entreaties of the man on the ground that he would stay
+and help him up, he urged his horse forward and galloped away as fast as
+he could.  I remained for some time quiet, listening to various groans
+and exclamations uttered by the person on the ground; at length I said,
+'Holloa! are you hurt?'  'Spare my life, and take all I have!' said the
+voice from the ground.  'Have they not done robbing you yet?' said I;
+'when they have finished let me know, and I will come and help you.'  'Who
+is that?' said the voice; 'pray come and help me, and do me no mischief.'
+'You were saying that some one was robbing you,' said I; 'don't think I
+shall come till he is gone away.'  'Then you ben't he?' said the voice.
+'Aren't you robbed?' said I.  'Can't say I be,' said the voice; 'not yet
+at any rate; but who are you?  I don't know you.'  'A traveller whom you
+and your partner were going to run over in this dark lane; you almost
+frightened me out of my senses.'  'Frightened!' said the voice, in a
+louder tone; 'frightened! oh!' and thereupon I heard somebody getting
+upon his legs.  This accomplished, the individual proceeded to attend to
+his horse, and with a little difficulty raised him upon his legs also.
+'Aren't you hurt?' said I.  'Hurt!' said the voice; 'not I; don't think
+it, whatever the horse may be.  I tell you what, my fellow, I thought you
+were a robber, and now I find you are not; I have a good mind--'  'To do
+what?'  'To serve you out; aren't you ashamed--?'  'At what?' said I;
+'not to have robbed you?  Shall I set about it now?'  'Ha, ha!' said the
+man, dropping the bullying tone which he had assumed; 'you are
+joking--robbing! who talks of robbing?  I wonder how my horse's knees
+are; not much hurt, I think--only mired.'  The man, whoever he was, then
+got upon his horse; and, after moving him about a little, said, 'Good
+night, friend; where are you?'  'Here I am,' said I, 'just behind you.'
+'You are, are you?  Take that.'  I know not what he did, but probably
+pricking his horse with the spur the animal kicked out violently; one of
+his heels struck me on the shoulder, but luckily missed my face; I fell
+back with the violence of the blow, whilst the fellow scampered off at a
+great rate.  Stopping at some distance, he loaded me with abuse, and
+then, continuing his way at a rapid trot, I heard no more of him.
+
+'What a difference!' said I, getting up; 'last night I was feted in the
+hall of a rich genius, and to-night I am knocked down and mired in a dark
+lane by the heel of Master Wise's horse--I wonder who gave him that name?
+And yet he was wise enough to wreak his revenge upon me, and I was not
+wise enough to keep out of his way.  Well, I am not much hurt, so it is
+of little consequence.'
+
+I now bethought me that, as I had a carriage of my own, I might as well
+make use of it; I therefore got into the cart, and, taking the reins in
+my hand, gave an encouraging cry to the pony, whereupon the sturdy little
+animal started again at as brisk a pace as if he had not already come
+many a long mile.  I lay half reclining in the cart, holding the reins
+lazily, and allowing the animal to go just where he pleased, often
+wondering where he would conduct me.  At length I felt drowsy, and my
+head sank upon my breast; I soon aroused myself, but it was only to doze
+again; this occurred several times.  Opening my eyes after a doze
+somewhat longer than the others, I found that the drizzling rain had
+ceased, a corner of the moon was apparent in the heavens, casting a faint
+light; I looked around for a moment or two, but my eyes and brain were
+heavy with slumber, and I could scarcely distinguish where we were.  I
+had a kind of dim consciousness that we were traversing an uninclosed
+country--perhaps a heath; I thought, however, that I saw certain large
+black objects looming in the distance, which I had a confused idea might
+be woods or plantations; the pony still moved at his usual pace.  I did
+not find the jolting of the cart at all disagreeable, on the contrary, it
+had quite a somniferous effect upon me.  Again my eyes closed; I opened
+them once more, but with less perception in them than before, looked
+forward, and, muttering something about woodlands, I placed myself in an
+easier posture than I had hitherto done, and fairly fell asleep.
+
+How long I continued in that state I am unable to say, but I believe for
+a considerable time; I was suddenly awakened by the ceasing of the
+jolting to which I had become accustomed, and of which I was perfectly
+sensible in my sleep.  I started up and looked around me, the moon was
+still shining, and the face of the heaven was studded with stars; I found
+myself amidst a maze of bushes of various kinds, but principally hazel
+and holly, through which was a path or driftway with grass growing on
+either side, upon which the pony was already diligently browsing.  I
+conjectured that this place had been one of the haunts of his former
+master, and, on dismounting and looking about, was strengthened in that
+opinion by finding a spot under an ash tree which, from its burnt and
+blackened appearance, seemed to have been frequently used as a fireplace.
+I will take up my quarters here, thought I; it is an excellent spot for
+me to commence my new profession in; I was quite right to trust myself to
+the guidance of the pony.  Unharnessing the animal without delay, I
+permitted him to browse at free will on the grass, convinced that he
+would not wander far from a place to which he was so much attached; I
+then pitched the little tent close beside the ash tree to which I have
+alluded, and conveyed two or three articles into it, and instantly felt
+that I had commenced housekeeping for the first time in my life.
+Housekeeping, however, without a fire is a very sorry affair, something
+like the housekeeping of children in their toy houses; of this I was the
+more sensible from feeling very cold and shivering, owing to my late
+exposure to the rain, and sleeping in the night air.  Collecting,
+therefore, all the dry sticks and furze I could find, I placed them upon
+the fireplace, adding certain chips and a billet which I found in the
+cart, it having apparently been the habit of Slingsby to carry with him a
+small store of fuel.  Having then struck a spark in a tinder-box and
+lighted a match, I set fire to the combustible heap, and was not slow in
+raising a cheerful blaze; I then drew my cart near the fire, and, seating
+myself on one of the shafts, hung over the warmth with feelings of
+intense pleasure and satisfaction.  Having continued in this posture for
+a considerable time, I turned my eyes to the heaven in the direction of a
+particular star; I, however, could not find the star, nor indeed many of
+the starry train, the greater number having fled, from which
+circumstance, and from the appearance of the sky, I concluded that
+morning was nigh.  About this time I again began to feel drowsy; I
+therefore arose, and having prepared for myself a kind of couch in the
+tent, I flung myself upon it and went to sleep.
+
+I will not say that I was awakened in the morning by the carolling of
+birds, as I perhaps might if I were writing a novel; I awoke because, to
+use vulgar language, I had slept my sleep out, not because the birds were
+carolling around me in numbers, as they had probably been for hours
+without my hearing them.  I got up and left my tent; the morning was yet
+more bright than that of the preceding day.  Impelled by curiosity, I
+walked about endeavouring to ascertain to what place chance, or rather
+the pony, had brought me; following the driftway for some time, amidst
+bushes and stunted trees, I came to a grove of dark pines, through which
+it appeared to lead; I tracked it a few hundred yards, but seeing nothing
+but trees, and the way being wet and sloughy, owing to the recent rain, I
+returned on my steps, and, pursuing the path in another direction, came
+to a sandy road leading over a common, doubtless the one I had traversed
+the preceding night.  My curiosity satisfied, I returned to my little
+encampment, and on the way beheld a small footpath on the left winding
+through the bushes, which had before escaped my observation.  Having
+reached my tent and cart, I breakfasted on some of the provisions which I
+had procured the day before, and then proceeded to take a regular account
+of the stock formerly possessed by Slingsby the tinker, but now become my
+own by right of lawful purchase.
+
+Besides the pony, the cart, and the tent, I found I was possessed of a
+mattress stuffed with straw on which to lie, and a blanket to cover me,
+the last quite clean and nearly new; then there was a frying-pan and a
+kettle, the first for cooking any food which required cooking, and the
+second for heating any water which I might wish to heat.  I likewise
+found an earthen teapot and two or three cups; of the first I should
+rather say I found the remains, it being broken in three parts, no doubt
+since it came into my possession, which would have precluded the
+possibility of my asking anybody to tea for the present, should anybody
+visit me, even supposing I had tea and sugar, which was not the case.  I
+then overhauled what might more strictly be called the stock in trade;
+this consisted of various tools, an iron ladle, a chafing-pan and small
+bellows, sundry pans and kettles, the latter being of tin, with the
+exception of one which was of copper, all in a state of considerable
+dilapidation--if I may use the term; of these first Slingsby had spoken
+in particular, advising me to mend them as soon as possible, and to
+endeavour to sell them, in order that I might have the satisfaction of
+receiving some return upon the outlay which I had made.  There was
+likewise a small quantity of block tin, sheet tin, and solder.  'This
+Slingsby,' said I, 'is certainly a very honest man, he has sold me more
+than my money's worth; I believe, however, there is something more in the
+cart.'  Thereupon I rummaged the farther end of the cart, and, amidst a
+quantity of straw, I found a small anvil and bellows of that kind which
+are used in forges, and two hammers such as smiths use, one great, and
+the other small.
+
+The sight of these last articles caused me no little surprise, as no word
+which had escaped from the mouth of Slingsby had given me reason to
+suppose that he had ever followed the occupation of a smith; yet, if he
+had not, how did he come by them?  I sat down upon the shaft, and
+pondered the question deliberately in my mind; at length I concluded that
+he had come by them by one of those numerous casualties which occur upon
+the roads, of which I, being a young hand upon the roads, must have a
+very imperfect conception; honestly, of course--for I scouted the idea
+that Slingsby would have stolen this blacksmith's gear--for I had the
+highest opinion of his honesty, which opinion I still retain at the
+present day, which is upwards of twenty years from the time of which I am
+speaking, during the whole of which period I have neither seen the poor
+fellow nor received any intelligence of him.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXX
+
+
+New profession--Beautiful night--Jupiter--Sharp and shrill--The Rommany
+chi--All alone--Three-and-sixpence--What is Rommany?  Be civil--Parraco
+tute--Slight start--She will be grateful--The rustling.
+
+I passed the greater part of the day in endeavouring to teach myself the
+mysteries of my new profession.  I cannot say that I was very successful,
+but the time passed agreeably, and was therefore not ill spent.  Towards
+evening I flung my work aside, took some refreshment, and afterwards a
+walk.
+
+This time I turned up the small footpath of which I have already spoken.
+It led in a zigzag manner through thickets of hazel, elder, and sweet-
+brier; after following its windings for somewhat better than a furlong, I
+heard a gentle sound of water, and presently came to a small rill, which
+ran directly across the path.  I was rejoiced at the sight, for I had
+already experienced the want of water, which I yet knew must be nigh at
+hand, as I was in a place to all appearance occasionally frequented by
+wandering people, who I was aware never take up their quarters in places
+where water is difficult to be obtained.  Forthwith I stretched myself on
+the ground, and took a long and delicious draught of the crystal stream,
+and then, seating myself in a bush, I continued for some time gazing on
+the water as it purled tinkling away in its channel through an opening in
+the hazels, and should have probably continued much longer had not the
+thought that I had left my property unprotected compelled me to rise and
+return to my encampment.
+
+Night came on, and a beautiful night it was; up rose the moon, and
+innumerable stars decked the firmament of heaven.  I sat on the shaft, my
+eyes turned upwards.  I had found it: there it was twinkling millions of
+miles above me, mightiest star of the system to which we belong: of all
+stars the one which has most interest for me--the star Jupiter.
+
+Why have I always taken an interest in thee, O Jupiter?  I know nothing
+about thee, save what every child knows, that thou art a big star, whose
+only light is derived from moons.  And is not that knowledge enough to
+make me feel an interest in thee?  Ay, truly; I never look at thee
+without wondering what is going on in thee; what is life in Jupiter?  That
+there is life in Jupiter who can doubt?  There is life in our own little
+star, therefore there must be life in Jupiter, which is not a little
+star.  But how different must life be in Jupiter from what it is in our
+own little star!  Life here is life beneath the dear sun--life in Jupiter
+is life beneath moons--four moons--no single moon is able to illumine
+that vast bulk.  All know what life is in our own little star; it is
+anything but a routine of happiness here, where the dear sun rises to us
+every day: then how sad and moping must life be in mighty Jupiter, on
+which no sun ever shines, and which is never lighted save by pale
+moonbeams!  The thought that there is more sadness and melancholy in
+Jupiter than in this world of ours, where, alas! there is but too much,
+has always made me take a melancholy interest in that huge distant star.
+
+Two or three days passed by in much the same manner as the first.  During
+the morning I worked upon my kettles, and employed the remaining part of
+the day as I best could.  The whole of this time I only saw two
+individuals, rustics, who passed by my encampment without vouchsafing me
+a glance; they probably considered themselves my superiors, as perhaps
+they were.
+
+One very brilliant morning, as I sat at work in very good spirits, for by
+this time I had actually mended in a very creditable way, as I imagined,
+two kettles and a frying-pan, I heard a voice which seemed to proceed
+from the path leading to the rivulet; at first it sounded from a
+considerable distance, but drew nearer by degrees.  I soon remarked that
+the tones were exceedingly sharp and shrill, with yet something of
+childhood in them.  Once or twice I distinguished certain words in the
+song which the voice was singing; the words were--but no, I thought again
+I was probably mistaken--and then the voice ceased for a time; presently
+I heard it again, close to the entrance of the footpath; in another
+moment I heard it in the lane or glade in which stood my tent, where it
+abruptly stopped, but not before I had heard the very words which I at
+first thought I had distinguished.
+
+I turned my head; at the entrance of the footpath, which might be about
+thirty yards from the place where I was sitting, I perceived the figure
+of a young girl; her face was turned towards me, and she appeared to be
+scanning me and my encampment; after a little time she looked in the
+other direction, only for a moment, however; probably observing nothing
+in that quarter, she again looked towards me, and almost immediately
+stepped forward; and, as she advanced, sang the song which I had heard in
+the wood, the first words of which were those which I have already
+alluded to.
+
+   'The Rommany chi
+   And the Rommany chal
+   Shall jaw tasaulor
+   To drab the bawlor,
+   And dook the gry
+   Of the farming rye.'
+
+{picture:'The Rommany chi.': page393.jpg}
+
+A very pretty song, thought I, falling again hard to work upon my kettle;
+a very pretty song, which bodes the farmers much good.  Let them look to
+their cattle.
+
+'All alone here, brother?' said a voice close by me, in sharp but not
+disagreeable tones.
+
+I made no answer, but continued my work, click, click, with the gravity
+which became one of my profession.  I allowed at least half a minute to
+elapse before I even lifted up my eyes.
+
+A girl of about thirteen was standing before me; her features were very
+pretty, but with a peculiar expression; her complexion was a clear olive,
+and her jet black hair hung back upon her shoulders.  She was rather
+scantily dressed, and her arms and feet were bare; round her neck,
+however, was a handsome string of corals, with ornaments of gold; in her
+hand she held a bulrush.
+
+'All alone here, brother?' said the girl, as I looked up; 'all alone
+here, in the lane; where are your wife and children?'
+
+'Why do you call me brother?' said I; 'I am no brother of yours.  Do you
+take me for one of your people?  I am no gypsy; not I, indeed!'
+
+'Don't be afraid, brother, you are no Roman--Roman indeed, you are not
+handsome enough to be a Roman; not black enough, tinker though you be.  If
+I called you brother, it was because I didn't know what else to call you.
+Marry, come up, brother, I should be sorry to have you for a brother.'
+
+'Then you don't like me?'
+
+'Neither like you nor dislike you, brother; what will you have for that
+kekaubi?'
+
+'What's the use of talking to me in that unchristian way; what do you
+mean, young gentlewoman?'
+
+'Lord, brother, what a fool you are; every tinker knows what a kekaubi
+is.  I was asking you what you would have for that kettle.'
+
+'Three-and-sixpence, young gentlewoman; isn't it well mended?'
+
+'Well mended!  I could have done it better myself; three-and-sixpence!
+it's only fit to be played at football with.'
+
+'I will take no less for it, young gentlewoman; it has caused me a world
+of trouble.'
+
+'I never saw a worse mended kettle.  I say, brother, your hair is white.'
+
+''Tis nature; your hair is black; nature, nothing but nature.'
+
+'I am young, brother; my hair is black--that's nature: you are young,
+brother; your hair is white--that's not nature.'
+
+'I can't help it if it be not, but it is nature after all; did you never
+see gray hair on the young?'
+
+'Never!  I have heard it is true of a gray lad, and a bad one he was.  Oh,
+so bad.'
+
+'Sit down on the grass, and tell me all about it, sister; do, to oblige
+me, pretty sister.'
+
+'Hey, brother, you don't speak as you did--you don't speak like a gorgio,
+you speak like one of us, you call me sister.'
+
+'As you call me brother; I am not an uncivil person after all, sister.'
+
+'I say, brother, tell me one thing, and look me in the face--there--do
+you speak Rommany?'
+
+'Rommany!  Rommany! what is Rommany?'
+
+'What is Rommany? our language to be sure; tell me, brother, only one
+thing, you don't speak Rommany?'
+
+'You say it.'
+
+'I don't say it, I wish to know.  Do you speak Rommany?'
+
+'Do you mean thieves' slang--cant? no, I don't speak cant, don't like it,
+I only know a few words; they call a sixpence a tanner, don't they?'
+
+'I don't know,' said the girl, sitting down on the ground, 'I was almost
+thinking--well, never mind, you don't know Rommany.  I say, brother, I
+think I should like to have the kekaubi.'
+
+'I thought you said it was badly mended?'
+
+'Yes, yes, brother, but--'
+
+'I thought you said it was only fit to be played at football with?'
+
+'Yes, yes, brother, but--'
+
+'What will you give for it?'
+
+'Brother, I am the poor person's child, I will give you sixpence for the
+kekaubi.'
+
+'Poor person's child; how came you by that necklace?'
+
+'Be civil, brother; am I to have the kekaubi?'
+
+'Not for sixpence; isn't the kettle nicely mended?'
+
+'I never saw a nicer mended kettle, brother; am I to have the kekaubi,
+brother?'
+
+'You like me then?'
+
+'I don't dislike you--I dislike no one; there's only one, and him I don't
+dislike, him I hate.'
+
+'Who is he?'
+
+'I scarcely know, I never saw him, but 'tis no affair of yours, you don't
+speak Rommany; you will let me have the kekaubi, pretty brother?'
+
+'You may have it, but not for sixpence; I'll give it to you.'
+
+'Parraco tute, that is, I thank you, brother; the rikkeni kekaubi is now
+mine.  O, rare!  I thank you kindly, brother.'
+
+Starting up, she flung the bulrush aside which she had hitherto held in
+her hand, and, seizing the kettle, she looked at it for a moment, and
+then began a kind of dance, flourishing the kettle over her head the
+while, and singing--
+
+   'The Rommany chi
+   And the Rommany chal
+   Shall jaw tasaulor
+   To drab the bawlor,
+   And dook the gry
+   Of the farming rye.
+
+Good-bye, brother, I must be going.'
+
+'Good-bye, sister; why do you sing that wicked song?'
+
+'Wicked song, hey, brother! you don't understand the song!'
+
+'Ha, ha! gypsy daughter,' said I, starting up and clapping my hands, 'I
+don't understand Rommany, don't I?  You shall see; here's the answer to
+your gillie--
+
+   'The Rommany chi
+   And the Rommany chal,
+   Love Luripen
+   And dukkeripen,
+   And hokkeripen,
+   And every pen
+   But Lachipen
+   And tatchipen.'
+
+The girl, who had given a slight start when I began, remained for some
+time after I had concluded the song standing motionless as a statue, with
+the kettle in her hand.  At length she came towards me, and stared me
+full in the face.  'Gray, tall, and talks Rommany,' said she to herself.
+In her countenance there was an expression which I had not seen before--an
+expression which struck me as being composed of fear, curiosity, and the
+deepest hate.  It was momentary, however, and was succeeded by one
+smiling, frank, and open.  'Ha, ha, brother,' said she, 'well, I like you
+all the better for talking Rommany; it is a sweet language, isn't it?
+especially as you sing it.  How did you pick it up?  But you picked it up
+upon the roads, no doubt?  Ha, it was funny in you to pretend not to know
+it, and you so flush with it all the time; it was not kind in you,
+however, to frighten the poor person's child so by screaming out, but it
+was kind in you to give the rikkeni kekaubi to the child of the poor
+person.  She will be grateful to you; she will bring you her little dog
+to show you, her pretty juggal; the poor person's child will come and see
+you again; you are not going away to-day, I hope, or to-morrow, pretty
+brother, gray-haired brother--you are not going away to-morrow, I hope?'
+
+'Nor the next day,' said I, 'only to take a stroll to see if I can sell a
+kettle; good-bye, little sister, Rommany sister, dingy sister.'
+
+'Good-bye, tall brother,' said the girl, as she departed, singing
+
+   'The Rommany chi,' etc.
+
+'There's something about that girl that I don't understand,' said I to
+myself; 'something mysterious.  However, it is nothing to me, she knows
+not who I am, and if she did, what then?'
+
+Late that evening as I sat on the shaft of my cart in deep meditation,
+with my arms folded, I thought I heard a rustling in the bushes over
+against me.  I turned my eyes in that direction, but saw nothing.  'Some
+bird,' said I; 'an owl, perhaps'; and once more I fell into meditation;
+my mind wandered from one thing to another--musing now on the structure
+of the Roman tongue--now on the rise and fall of the Persian power--and
+now on the powers vested in recorders at quarter-sessions.  I was
+thinking what a fine thing it must be to be a recorder of the peace,
+when, lifting up my eyes, I saw right opposite, not a culprit at the bar,
+but, staring at me through a gap in the bush, a face wild and strange,
+half covered with gray hair; I only saw it a moment, the next it had
+disappeared.
+
+{picture:I saw, staring at me through a gap in the bush, a face wild and
+strange, half covered with gray hair: page396.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXI
+
+
+Friend of Slingsby--All quiet--Danger--The two cakes--Children in the
+wood--Don't be angry--In deep thought--Temples throbbing--Deadly
+sick--Another blow--No answer--How old are you?--Play and sacrament--Heavy
+heart--Song of poison--Drow of gypsies--The dog--Ely's church--Get up,
+bebee--The vehicle--Can you speak?--The oil.
+
+The next day, at an early hour, I harnessed my little pony, and, putting
+my things in my cart, I went on my projected stroll.  Crossing the moor,
+I arrived in about an hour at a small village, from which, after a short
+stay, I proceeded to another, and from thence to a third.  I found that
+the name of Slingsby was well known in these parts.
+
+'If you are a friend of Slingsby you must be an honest lad,' said an
+ancient crone; 'you shall never want for work whilst I can give it you.
+Here, take my kettle, the bottom came out this morning, and lend me that
+of yours till you bring it back.  I'm not afraid to trust you--not I.
+Don't hurry yourself, young man, if you don't come back for a fortnight I
+shan't have the worse opinion of you.'
+
+I returned to my quarters at evening, tired, but rejoiced at heart; I had
+work before me for several days, having collected various kekaubies which
+required mending, in place of those which I left behind--those which I
+had been employed upon during the last few days.  I found all quiet in
+the lane or glade, and, unharnessing my little horse, I once more pitched
+my tent in the old spot beneath the ash, lighted my fire, ate my frugal
+meal, and then, after looking for some time at the heavenly bodies, and
+more particularly at the star Jupiter, I entered my tent, lay down upon
+my pallet, and went to sleep.
+
+Nothing occurred on the following day which requires any particular
+notice, nor indeed on the one succeeding that.  It was about noon on the
+third day that I sat beneath the shade of the ash tree; I was not at
+work, for the weather was particularly hot, and I felt but little
+inclination to make any exertion.  Leaning my back against the tree, I
+was not long in falling into a slumber; I particularly remember that
+slumber of mine beneath the ash tree, for it was about the sweetest
+slumber that I ever enjoyed; how long I continued in it I do not know; I
+could almost have wished that it had lasted to the present time.  All of
+a sudden it appeared to me that a voice cried in my ear, 'Danger! danger!
+danger!'  Nothing seemingly could be more distinct than the words which I
+heard; then an uneasy sensation came over me, which I strove to get rid
+of, and at last succeeded, for I awoke.  The gypsy girl was standing just
+opposite to me, with her eyes fixed upon my countenance; a singular kind
+of little dog stood beside her.
+
+'Ha!' said I, 'was it you that cried danger?  What danger is there?'
+
+'Danger, brother, there is no danger; what danger should there be?  I
+called to my little dog, but that was in the wood; my little dog's name
+is not danger, but Stranger; what danger should there be, brother?'
+
+'What, indeed, except in sleeping beneath a tree; what is that you have
+got in your hand?'
+
+'Something for you,' said the girl, sitting down and proceeding to untie
+a white napkin; 'a pretty manricli, so sweet, so nice; when I went home
+to my people I told my grandbebee how kind you had been to the poor
+person's child, and when my grandbebee saw the kekaubi, she said, "Hir mi
+devlis, it won't do for the poor people to be ungrateful; by my God, I
+will bake a cake for the young harko mescro."'
+
+'But there are two cakes.'
+
+'Yes, brother, two cakes, both for you; my grandbebee meant them both for
+you--but list, brother, I will have one of them for bringing them.  I
+know you will give me one, pretty brother, gray-haired brother--which
+shall I have, brother?'
+
+In the napkin were two round cakes, seemingly made of rich and costly
+compounds, and precisely similar in form, each weighing about half a
+pound.
+
+'Which shall I have, brother?' said the gypsy girl.
+
+'Whichever you please.'
+
+'No, brother, no, the cakes are yours, not mine.  It is for you to say.'
+
+'Well, then, give me the one nearest you, and take the other.'
+
+'Yes, brother, yes,' said the girl; and taking the cakes, she flung them
+into the air two or three times, catching them as they fell, and singing
+the while.  'Pretty brother, gray-haired brother--here, brother,' said
+she, 'here is your cake, this other is mine.'
+
+'Are you sure,' said I, taking the cake, 'that this is the one I chose?'
+
+'Quite sure, brother; but if you like you can have mine; there's no
+difference, however--shall I eat?'
+
+'Yes, sister, eat.'
+
+'See, brother, I do; now, brother, eat, pretty brother, gray-haired
+brother.'
+
+'I am not hungry.'
+
+'Not hungry! well, what then--what has being hungry to do with the
+matter?  It is my grandbebee's cake which was sent because you were kind
+to the poor person's child; eat, brother, eat, and we shall be like the
+children in the wood that the gorgios speak of.'
+
+'The children in the wood had nothing to eat.'
+
+'Yes, they had hips and haws; we have better.  Eat, brother.'
+
+'See, sister, I do,' and I ate a piece of the cake.
+
+'Well, brother, how do you like it?' said the girl, looking fixedly at
+me.
+
+'It is very rich and sweet, and yet there is something strange about it;
+I don't think I shall eat any more.'
+
+'Fie, brother, fie, to find fault with the poor person's cake; see, I
+have nearly eaten mine.'
+
+'That's a pretty little dog.'
+
+'Is it not, brother? that's my juggal, my little sister, as I call her.'
+
+'Come here, juggal,' said I to the animal.
+
+'What do you want with my juggal?' said the girl.
+
+'Only to give her a piece of cake,' said I, offering the dog a piece
+which I had just broken off.
+
+'What do you mean?' said the girl, snatching the dog away; 'my
+grandbebee's cake is not for dogs.'
+
+'Why, I just now saw you give the animal a piece of yours.'
+
+'You lie, brother, you saw no such thing; but I see how it is, you wish
+to affront the poor person's child.  I shall go to my house.'
+
+'Keep still, and don't be angry; see, I have eaten the piece which I
+offered the dog.  I meant no offence.  It is a sweet cake after all.'
+
+'Isn't it, brother?  I am glad you like it.  Offence, brother, no offence
+at all!  I am so glad you like my grandbebee's cake, but she will be
+wanting me at home.  Eat one piece more of grandbebee's cake, and I will
+go.'
+
+'I am not hungry, I will put the rest by.'
+
+'One piece more before I go, handsome brother, gray-haired brother.'
+
+'I will not eat any more, I have already eaten more than I wished to
+oblige you; if you must go, good-day to you.'
+
+The girl rose upon her feet, looked hard at me, then at the remainder of
+the cake which I held in my hand, and then at me again, and then stood
+for a moment or two, as if in deep thought; presently an air of
+satisfaction came over her countenance, she smiled and said, 'Well,
+brother, well, do as you please, I merely wished you to eat because you
+have been so kind to the poor person's child.  She loves you so, that she
+could have wished to have seen you eat it all; good-bye, brother, I
+daresay when I am gone you will eat some more of it, and if you don't, I
+daresay you have eaten enough to--to--show your love for us.  After all
+it was a poor person's cake, a Rommany manricli, and all you gorgios are
+somewhat gorgious.  Farewell, brother, pretty brother, gray-haired
+brother.  Come, juggal.'
+
+I remained under the ash tree seated on the grass for a minute or two,
+and endeavoured to resume the occupation in which I had been engaged
+before I fell asleep, but I felt no inclination for labour.  I then
+thought I would sleep again, and once more reclined against the tree, and
+slumbered for some little time, but my sleep was more agitated than
+before.  Something appeared to bear heavy on my breast, I struggled in my
+sleep, fell on the grass, and awoke; my temples were throbbing, there was
+a burning in my eyes, and my mouth felt parched; the oppression about the
+chest which I had felt in my sleep still continued.  'I must shake off
+these feelings,' said I, 'and get upon my legs.'  I walked rapidly up and
+down upon the green sward; at length, feeling my thirst increase, I
+directed my steps down the narrow path to the spring which ran amidst the
+bushes; arriving there, I knelt down and drank of the water, but on
+lifting up my head I felt thirstier than before; again I drank, but with
+the like result; I was about to drink for the third time, when I felt a
+dreadful qualm which instantly robbed me of nearly all my strength.  What
+can be the matter with me? thought I; but I suppose I have made myself
+ill by drinking cold water.  I got up and made the best of my way back to
+my tent; before I reached it the qualm had seized me again, and I was
+deadly sick.  I flung myself on my pallet, qualm succeeded qualm, but in
+the intervals my mouth was dry and burning, and I felt a frantic desire
+to drink, but no water was at hand, and to reach the spring once more was
+impossible; the qualms continued, deadly pains shot through my whole
+frame; I could bear my agonies no longer, and I fell into a trance or
+swoon.  How long I continued therein I know not; on recovering, however,
+I felt somewhat better, and attempted to lift my head off my couch; the
+next moment, however, the qualms and pains returned, if possible, with
+greater violence than before.  I am dying, thought I, like a dog, without
+any help; and then methought I heard a sound at a distance like people
+singing, and then once more I relapsed into my swoon.
+
+I revived just as a heavy blow sounded upon the canvas of the tent.  I
+started, but my condition did not permit me to rise; again the same kind
+of blow sounded upon the canvas; I thought for a moment of crying out and
+requesting assistance, but an inexplicable something chained my tongue,
+and now I heard a whisper on the outside of the tent.  'He does not move,
+bebee,' said a voice which I knew.  'I should not wonder if it has done
+for him already; however, strike again with your ran'; and then there was
+another blow, after which another voice cried aloud in a strange tone,
+'Is the gentleman of the house asleep, or is he taking his dinner?'  I
+remained quite silent and motionless, and in another moment the voice
+continued, 'What, no answer? what can the gentleman of the house be about
+that he makes no answer? perhaps the gentleman of the house may be
+darning his stockings?'  Thereupon a face peered into the door of the
+tent, at the farther extremity of which I was stretched.  It was that of
+a woman, but owing to the posture in which she stood, with her back to
+the light, and partly owing to a large straw bonnet, I could distinguish
+but very little of the features of her countenance.  I had, however,
+recognised her voice; it was that of my old acquaintance, Mrs. Herne.
+'Ho, ho, sir!' said she, 'here you are.  Come here, Leonora,' said she to
+the gypsy girl, who pressed in at the other side of the door; 'here is
+the gentleman, not asleep, but only stretched out after dinner.  Sit down
+on your ham, child, at the door, I shall do the same.  There--you have
+seen me before, sir, have you not?'
+
+'The gentleman makes no answer, bebee; perhaps he does not know you.'
+
+'I have known him of old, Leonora,' said Mrs. Herne; 'and, to tell you
+the truth, though I spoke to him just now, I expected no answer.'
+
+'It's a way he has, bebee, I suppose?'
+
+'Yes, child, it's a way he has.'
+
+'Take off your bonnet, bebee, perhaps he cannot see your face.'
+
+'I do not think that will be of much use, child; however, I will take off
+my bonnet--there--and shake out my hair--there--you have seen this hair
+before, sir, and this face--'
+
+'No answer, bebee.'
+
+'Though the one was not quite so gray, nor the other so wrinkled.'
+
+'How came they so, bebee?'
+
+'All along of this gorgio, child.'
+
+'The gentleman in the house, you mean, bebee?'
+
+'Yes, child, the gentleman in the house.  God grant that I may preserve
+my temper.  Do you know, sir, my name?  My name is Herne, which signifies
+a hairy individual, though neither gray-haired nor wrinkled.  It is not
+the nature of the Hernes to be gray or wrinkled, even when they are old,
+and I am not old.'
+
+'How old are you, bebee?'
+
+'Sixty-five years, child--an inconsiderable number.  My mother was a
+hundred and one--a considerable age--when she died, yet she had not one
+gray hair, and not more than six wrinkles--an inconsiderable number.'
+
+'She had no griefs, bebee?'
+
+'Plenty, child, but not like mine.'
+
+'Not quite so hard to bear, bebee?'
+
+'No, child; my head wanders when I think of them.  After the death of my
+husband, who came to his end untimeously, I went to live with a daughter
+of mine, married out among certain Romans who walk about the eastern
+counties, and with whom for some time I found a home and pleasant
+society, for they lived right Romanly, which gave my heart considerable
+satisfaction, who am a Roman born, and hope to die so.  When I say right
+Romanly, I mean that they kept to themselves, and were not much given to
+blabbing about their private matters in promiscuous company.  Well,
+things went on in this way for some time, when one day my son-in-law
+brings home a young gorgio of singular and outrageous ugliness, and,
+without much preamble, says to me and mine, "This is my pal, ain't he a
+beauty? fall down and worship him."  "Hold," said I, "I for one will
+never consent to such foolishness."'
+
+'That was right, bebee, I think I should have done the same.'
+
+'I think you would, child; but what was the profit of it?  The whole
+party makes an almighty of this gorgio, lets him into their ways, says
+prayers of his making, till things come to such a pass that my own
+daughter says to me, "I shall buy myself a veil and fan, and treat myself
+to a play and sacrament."  "Don't," says I; says she, "I should like for
+once in my life to be courtesied to as a Christian gentlewoman."'
+
+'Very foolish of her, bebee.'
+
+'Wasn't it, child?  Where was I?  At the fan and sacrament; with a heavy
+heart I put seven score miles between us, came back to the hairy ones,
+and found them over-given to gorgious companions; said I, "Foolish
+manners is catching; all this comes of that there gorgio."  Answers the
+child Leonora, "Take comfort, bebee; I hate the gorgios as much as you
+do."'
+
+'And I say so again, bebee, as much or more.'
+
+'Time flows on, I engage in many matters, in most miscarry.  Am sent to
+prison; says I to myself, I am become foolish.  Am turned out of prison,
+and go back to the hairy ones, who receive me not over courteously; says
+I, for their unkindness, and my own foolishness, all the thanks to that
+gorgio.  Answers to me the child, "I wish I could set eyes upon him,
+bebee."'
+
+'I did so, bebee; go on.'
+
+'"How shall I know him, bebee?" says the child.  "Young and gray, tall,
+and speaks Romanly."  Runs to me the child, and says, "I've found him,
+bebee."  "Where, child?" says I.  "Come with me, bebee," says the child.
+"That's he," says I, as I looked at my gentleman through the hedge.'
+
+'Ha, ha! bebee, and here he lies, poisoned like a hog.'
+
+'You have taken drows, sir,' said Mrs. Herne; 'do you hear, sir? drows;
+tip him a stave, child, of the song of poison.'
+
+And thereupon the girl clapped her hands, and sang--
+
+   'The Rommany churl
+   And the Rommany girl
+   To-morrow shall hie
+   To poison the sty,
+   And bewitch on the mead
+   The farmer's steed.'
+
+'Do you hear that, sir?' said Mrs. Herne; 'the child has tipped you a
+stave of the song of poison: that is, she has sung it Christianly, though
+perhaps you would like to hear it Romanly; you were always fond of what
+was Roman.  Tip it him Romanly, child.'
+
+'He has heard it Romanly already, bebee; 'twas by that I found him out,
+as I told you.'
+
+'Halloo, sir, are you sleeping? you have taken drows; the gentleman makes
+no answer.  God give me patience!'
+
+'And what if he doesn't, bebee; isn't he poisoned like a hog?  Gentleman,
+indeed! why call him gentleman? if he ever was one he's broke, and is now
+a tinker, a worker of blue metal.'
+
+'That's his way, child, to-day a tinker, to-morrow something else; and as
+for being drabbed, I don't know what to say about it.'
+
+'Not drabbed! what do you mean, bebee? but look there, bebee; ha, ha,
+look at the gentleman's motions.'
+
+'He is sick, child, sure enough.  Ho, ho! sir, you have taken drows;
+what, another throe! writhe, sir, writhe; the hog died by the drow of
+gypsies; I saw him stretched at evening.  That's yourself, sir.  There is
+no hope, sir, no help, you have taken drow; shall I tell you your
+fortune, sir, your dukkerin?  God bless you, pretty gentleman, much
+trouble will you have to suffer, and much water to cross; but never mind,
+pretty gentleman, you shall be fortunate at the end, and those who hate
+shall take off their hats to you.'
+
+'Hey, bebee!' cried the girl; 'what is this? what do you mean? you have
+blessed the gorgio!'
+
+'Blessed him! no, sure; what did I say?  Oh, I remember, I'm mad; well, I
+can't help it, I said what the dukkerin dook told me; woe's me, he'll get
+up yet.'
+
+'Nonsense, bebee!  Look at his motions, he's drabbed, spite of dukkerin.'
+
+'Don't say so, child; he's sick, 'tis true, but don't laugh at dukkerin,
+only folks do that that know no better.  I, for one, will never laugh at
+the dukkerin dook.  Sick again; I wish he was gone.'
+
+'He'll soon be gone, bebee; let's leave him.  He's as good as gone; look
+there, he's dead.'
+
+'No, he's not, he'll get up--I feel it; can't we hasten him?'
+
+'Hasten him! yes, to be sure; set the dog upon him.  Here, juggal, look
+in there, my dog.'
+
+The dog made its appearance at the door of the tent, and began to bark
+and tear up the ground.
+
+'At him, juggal, at him; he wished to poison, to drab you.  Halloo!'
+
+The dog barked violently, and seemed about to spring at my face, but
+retreated.
+
+'The dog won't fly at him, child; he flashed at the dog with his eye, and
+scared him.  He'll get up.'
+
+'Nonsense, bebee! you make me angry; how should he get up?'
+
+'The dook tells me so, and, what's more, I had a dream.  I thought I was
+at York, standing amidst a crowd to see a man hung, and the crowd
+shouted, "There he comes!" and I looked, and, lo! it was the tinker;
+before I could cry with joy I was whisked away, and I found myself in
+Ely's big church, which was chock full of people to hear the dean preach,
+and all eyes were turned to the big pulpit; and presently I heard them
+say, "There he mounts!" and I looked up to the big pulpit, and, lo! the
+tinker was in the pulpit, and he raised his arm and began to preach.
+Anon, I found myself at York again, just as the drop fell, and I looked
+up, and I saw not the tinker, but my own self hanging in the air.'
+
+'You are going mad, bebee; if you want to hasten him, take your stick and
+poke him in the eye.'
+
+'That will be of no use, child, the dukkerin tells me so; but I will try
+what I can do.  Halloo, tinker! you must introduce yourself into a quiet
+family, and raise confusion--must you?  You must steal its language, and,
+what was never done before, write it down Christianly--must you?  Take
+that--and that'; and she stabbed violently with her stick towards the end
+of the tent.
+
+'That's right, bebee, you struck his face; now once more, and let it be
+in the eye.  Stay, what's that? get up, bebee.'
+
+'What's the matter, child?'
+
+'Some one is coming, come away.'
+
+'Let me make sure of him, child; he'll be up yet.'  And thereupon Mrs.
+Herne, rising, leaned forward into the tent, and, supporting herself
+against the pole, took aim in the direction of the farther end.  'I will
+thrust out his eye,' said she; and, lunging with her stick, she would
+probably have accomplished her purpose had not at that moment the pole of
+the tent given way, whereupon she fell to the ground, the canvas falling
+upon her and her intended victim.
+
+'Here's a pretty affair, bebee,' screamed the girl.
+
+'He'll get up, yet,' said Mrs. Herne, from beneath the canvas.
+
+'Get up!--get up yourself; where are you? where is your--Here, there,
+bebee, here's the door; there, make haste, they are coming.'
+
+'He'll get up yet,' said Mrs. Herne, recovering her breath; 'the dock
+tells me so.'
+
+'Never mind him or the dook; he is drabbed; come away, or we shall be
+grabbed--both of us.'
+
+'One more blow, I know where his head lies.'
+
+'You are mad, bebee; leave the fellow--gorgio avella.'
+
+And thereupon the females hurried away.
+
+A vehicle of some kind was evidently drawing nigh; in a little time it
+came alongside of the place where lay the fallen tent, and stopped
+suddenly.  There was a silence for a moment, and then a parley ensued
+between two voices, one of which was that of a woman.  It was not in
+English, but in a deep guttural tongue.
+
+'Peth yw hono sydd yn gorwedd yna ar y ddaear?' said a masculine voice.
+
+'Yn wirionedd--I do not know what it can be,' said the female voice, in
+the same tongue.
+
+'Here is a cart, and there are tools; but what is that on the ground?'
+
+'Something moves beneath it; and what was that--a groan?'
+
+'Shall I get down?'
+
+'Of course, Peter, some one may want your help?
+
+'Then I will get down, though I do not like this place; it is frequented
+by Egyptians, and I do not like their yellow faces, nor their clibberty
+clabber, as Master Ellis Wyn says.  Now I am down.  It is a tent,
+Winifred, and see, here is a boy beneath it.  Merciful father! what a
+face.'
+
+A middle-aged man, with a strongly marked and serious countenance,
+dressed in sober-coloured habiliments, had lifted up the stifling folds
+of the tent, and was bending over me.  'Can you speak, my lad?' said he
+in English; 'what is the matter with you? if you could but tell me, I
+could perhaps help you--'  'What is that you say?  I can't hear you.  I
+will kneel down'; and he flung himself on the ground, and placed his ear
+close to my mouth.  'Now speak if you can.  Hey! what! no, sure, God
+forbid!' then starting up, he cried to a female who sat in the cart,
+anxiously looking on--'Gwenwyn! gwenwyn! yw y gwas wedi ei gwenwynaw.  The
+oil!  Winifred, the oil!'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXII
+
+
+Desired effect--The three oaks--Winifred--Things of time--With God's
+will--The preacher--Creature comforts--Croesaw--Welsh and English--Mayor
+of Chester.
+
+The oil, which the strangers compelled me to take, produced the desired
+effect, though, during at least two hours, it was very doubtful whether
+or not my life would be saved.  At the end of that period the man said
+that with the blessing of God he would answer for my life.  He then
+demanded whether I thought I could bear to be removed from the place in
+which we were; 'for I like it not,' he continued, 'as something within me
+tells me that it is not good for any of us to be here.'  I told him, as
+well as I was able, that I, too, should be glad to leave the place;
+whereupon, after collecting my things, he harnessed my pony, and, with
+the assistance of the woman, he contrived to place me in the cart; he
+then gave me a draught out of a small phial, and we set forward at a slow
+pace, the man walking by the side of the cart in which I lay.  It is
+probable that the draught consisted of a strong opiate, for after
+swallowing it I fell into a deep slumber; on my awaking, I found that the
+shadows of night had enveloped the earth--we were still moving on.
+Shortly, however, after descending a declivity, we turned into a lane, at
+the entrance of which was a gate.  This lane conducted to a meadow,
+through the middle of which ran a small brook; it stood between two
+rising grounds; that on the left, which was on the farther side of the
+water, was covered with wood, whilst the one on the right, which was not
+so high, was crowned with the white walls of what appeared to be a
+farmhouse.
+
+Advancing along the meadow, we presently came to a place where grew three
+immense oaks, almost on the side of the brook, over which they flung
+their arms, so as to shade it as with a canopy; the ground beneath was
+bare of grass, and nearly as hard and smooth as the floor of a barn.
+Having led his own cart on one side of the midmost tree, and my own on
+the other, the stranger said to me, 'This is the spot where my wife and
+myself generally tarry in the summer season, when we come into these
+parts.  We are about to pass the night here.  I suppose you will have no
+objection to do the same?  Indeed, I do not see what else you could do
+under present circumstances.'  After receiving my answer, in which I, of
+course, expressed my readiness to assent to his proposal, he proceeded to
+unharness his horse, and, feeling myself much better, I got down, and
+began to make the necessary preparations for passing the night beneath
+the oak.
+
+Whilst thus engaged, I felt myself touched on the shoulder, and, looking
+round, perceived the woman, whom the stranger called Winifred, standing
+close to me.  The moon was shining brightly upon her, and I observed that
+she was very good-looking, with a composed yet cheerful expression of
+countenance; her dress was plain and primitive, very much resembling that
+of a Quaker.  She held a straw bonnet in her hand.  'I am glad to see
+thee moving about, young man,' said she, in a soft, placid tone; 'I could
+scarcely have expected it.  Thou must be wondrous strong; many, after
+what thou hast suffered, would not have stood on their feet for weeks and
+months.  What do I say?--Peter, my husband, who is skilled in medicine,
+just now told me that not one in five hundred would have survived what
+thou hast this day undergone; but allow me to ask thee one thing, Hast
+thou returned thanks to God for thy deliverance?'  I made no answer, and
+the woman, after a pause, said, 'Excuse me, young man, but do you know
+anything of God?'  'Very little,' I replied, 'but I should say He must be
+a wondrous strong person, if He made all those big bright things up above
+there, to say nothing of the ground on which we stand, which bears beings
+like these oaks, each of which is fifty times as strong as myself, and
+will live twenty times as long.'  The woman was silent for some moments,
+and then said, 'I scarcely know in what spirit thy words are uttered.  If
+thou art serious, however, I would caution thee against supposing that
+the power of God is more manifested in these trees, or even in those
+bright stars above us, than in thyself--they are things of time, but thou
+art a being destined to an eternity; it depends upon thyself whether thy
+eternity shall be one of joy or sorrow.'
+
+Here she was interrupted by the man, who exclaimed from the other side of
+the tree, 'Winifred, it is getting late, you had better go up to the
+house on the hill to inform our friends of our arrival, or they will have
+retired for the night.'  'True,' said Winifred, and forthwith wended her
+way to the house in question, returning shortly with another woman, whom
+the man, speaking in the same language which I had heard him first use,
+greeted by the name of Mary; the woman replied in the same tongue, but
+almost immediately said, in English, 'We hoped to have heard you speak to-
+night, Peter, but we cannot expect that now, seeing that it is so late,
+owing to your having been detained by the way, as Winifred tells me;
+nothing remains for you to do now but to sup--to-morrow, with God's will,
+we shall hear you.'  'And to-night, also, with God's will, provided you
+be so disposed.  Let those of your family come hither.'  'They will be
+hither presently,' said Mary, 'for knowing that thou art arrived, they
+will, of course, come and bid thee welcome.'  And scarcely had she spoke,
+when I beheld a party of people descending the moonlit side of the hill.
+They soon arrived at the place where we were; they might amount in all to
+twelve individuals.  The principal person was a tall, athletic man, of
+about forty, dressed like a plain country farmer; this was, I soon found,
+the husband of Mary; the rest of the group consisted of the children of
+these two, and their domestic servants.  One after another they all shook
+Peter by the hand, men and women, boys and girls, and expressed their joy
+at seeing him.  After which he said, 'Now, friends, if you please, I will
+speak a few words to you.'  A stool was then brought him from the cart,
+which he stepped on, and the people arranging themselves round him, some
+standing, some seated on the ground, he forthwith began to address them
+in a clear, distinct voice; and the subject of his discourse was the
+necessity, in all human beings, of a change of heart.
+
+The preacher was better than his promise, for, instead of speaking a few
+words, he preached for at least three-quarters of an hour; none of the
+audience, however, showed the slightest symptom of weariness; on the
+contrary, the hope of each individual appeared to hang upon the words
+which proceeded from his mouth.  At the conclusion of the sermon or
+discourse the whole assembly again shook Peter by the hand, and returned
+to their house, the mistress of the family saying, as she departed, 'I
+shall soon be back, Peter; I go but to make arrangements for the supper
+of thyself and company'; and, in effect, she presently returned, attended
+by a young woman, who bore a tray in her hands.  'Set it down, Jessy,'
+said the mistress to the girl, 'and then betake thyself to thy rest, I
+shall remain here for a little time to talk with my friends.'  The girl
+departed, and the preacher and the two females placed themselves on the
+ground about the tray.  The man gave thanks, and himself and his wife
+appeared to be about to eat, when the latter suddenly placed her hand
+upon his arm, and said something to him in a low voice, whereupon he
+exclaimed, 'Ay, truly, we were both forgetful'; and then getting up, he
+came towards me, who stood a little way off, leaning against the wheel of
+my cart; and, taking me by the hand, he said, 'Pardon us, young man, we
+were both so engaged in our own creature-comforts, that we forgot thee,
+but it is not too late to repair our fault; wilt thou not join us, and
+taste our bread and milk?'  'I cannot eat,' I replied, 'but I think I
+could drink a little milk'; whereupon he led me to the rest, and seating
+me by his side, he poured some milk into a horn cup, saying, '"Croesaw."
+That,' added he, with a smile, 'is Welsh for welcome.'
+
+The fare upon the tray was of the simplest description, consisting of
+bread, cheese, milk, and curds.  My two friends partook with a good
+appetite.  'Mary,' said the preacher, addressing himself to the woman of
+the house, 'every time I come to visit thee, I find thee less inclined to
+speak Welsh.  I suppose, in a little time, thou wilt entirely have
+forgotten it; hast thou taught it to any of thy children?'  'The two
+eldest understand a few words,' said the woman, 'but my husband does not
+wish them to learn it; he says sometimes, jocularly, that though it
+pleased him to marry a Welsh wife, it does not please him to have Welsh
+children.  Who, I have heard him say, would be a Welshman, if he could be
+an Englishman?'  'I for one,' said the preacher, somewhat hastily; 'not
+to be king of all England would I give up my birthright as a Welshman.
+Your husband is an excellent person, Mary, but I am afraid he is somewhat
+prejudiced.'  'You do him justice, Peter, in saying that he is an
+excellent person,' sail the woman; 'as to being prejudiced, I scarcely
+know what to say, but he thinks that two languages in the same kingdom
+are almost as bad as two kings.'  'That's no bad observation,' said the
+preacher, 'and it is generally the case; yet, thank God, the Welsh and
+English go on very well, side by side, and I hope will do so till the
+Almighty calls all men to their long account.'  'They jog on very well
+now,' said the woman; 'but I have heard my husband say that it was not
+always so, and that the Welsh, in old times, were a violent and ferocious
+people, for that once they hanged the mayor of Chester.'  'Ha, ha!' said
+the preacher, and his eyes flashed in the moonlight; 'he told you that,
+did he?'  'Yes,' said Mary; 'once, when the mayor of Chester, with some
+of his people, was present at one of the fairs over the border, a quarrel
+arose between the Welsh and the English, and the Welsh beat the English,
+and hanged the mayor.'  'Your husband is a clever man,' said Peter, 'and
+knows a great deal; did he tell you the name of the leader of the Welsh?
+No! then I will: the leader of the Welsh on that occasion was ---.  He
+was a powerful chieftain, and there was an old feud between him and the
+men of Chester.  Afterwards, when two hundred of the men of Chester
+invaded his country to take revenge for their mayor, he enticed them into
+a tower, set fire to it, and burnt them all.  That--was a very fine,
+noble--God forgive me, what was I about to say--a very bad, violent man;
+but, Mary, this is very carnal and unprofitable conversation, and in
+holding it we set a very bad example to the young man here--let us change
+the subject.'
+
+They then began to talk on religious matters.  At length Mary departed to
+her abode, and the preacher and his wife retired to their tilted cart.
+
+'Poor fellow, he seems to be almost brutally ignorant,' said Peter,
+addressing his wife in their native language, after they had bidden me
+farewell for the night.
+
+'I am afraid he is,' said Winifred, 'yet my heart warms to the poor lad,
+he seems so forlorn.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXIII
+
+
+Morning hymn--Much alone--John Bunyan--Beholden to
+nobody--Sixty-five--Sober greeting--Early Sabbaths--Finny brood--The
+porch--No fortune-telling--The master's niece--Doing good--Two or three
+things--Groans and voices--Pechod Ysprydd Glan.
+
+I slept soundly during that night, partly owing to the influence of the
+opiate.  Early in the morning I was awakened by the voices of Peter and
+his wife, who were singing a morning hymn in their own language.  Both
+subsequently prayed long and fervently.  I lay still till their devotions
+were completed, and then left my tent.  'Good morning,' said Peter, 'how
+dost thou feel?'  'Much better,' said I, 'than I could have expected.'  'I
+am glad of it,' said Peter.  'Art thou hungry? yonder comes our
+breakfast,' pointing to the same young woman I had seen the preceding
+night, who was again descending the hill bearing the tray upon her head.
+
+'What dust thou intend to do, young man, this day?' said Peter, when we
+had about half finished breakfast.  'Do,' said I; 'as I do other days,
+what I can.'  'And dost thou pass this day as thou dost other days?' said
+Peter.  'Why not?' said I; 'what is there in this day different from the
+rest? it seems to be of the same colour as yesterday.'  'Art thou aware,'
+said the wife, interposing, 'what day it is? that it is Sabbath? that it
+is Sunday?'  'No,' said I, 'I did not know that it was Sunday.'  'And how
+did that happen?' said Winifred, with a sigh.  'To tell you the truth,'
+said I, 'I live very much alone, and pay very little heed to the passing
+of time.'  'And yet of what infinite importance is time,' said Winifred.
+'Art thou not aware that every year brings thee nearer to thy end?'  'I
+do not think,' said I, 'that I am so near my end as I was yesterday.'
+'Yes, thou art,' said the woman; 'thou wast not doomed to die yesterday;
+an invisible hand was watching over thee yesterday; but thy day will
+come, therefore improve the time; be grateful that thou wast saved
+yesterday; and, oh! reflect on one thing; if thou hadst died yesterday,
+where wouldst thou have been now?'  'Cast into the earth, perhaps,' said
+I.  'I have heard Mr. Petulengro say that to be cast into the earth is
+the natural end of man.'  'Who is Mr. Petulengro?' said Peter,
+interrupting his wife, as she was about to speak.  'Master of the horse-
+shoe,' said I; 'and, according to his own account, king of Egypt.'  'I
+understand,' said Peter, 'head of some family of wandering Egyptians--they
+are a race utterly godless.  Art thou of them?--but no, thou art not,
+thou hast not their yellow blood.  I suppose thou belongest to the family
+of wandering artisans called ---.  I do not like you the worse for
+belonging to them.  A mighty speaker of old sprang up from amidst that
+family.'  'Who was he?' said I.  'John Bunyan,' replied Peter,
+reverently, 'and the mention of his name reminds me that I have to preach
+this day; wilt thou go and hear? the distance is not great, only half a
+mile.'  'No,' said I, 'I will not go and hear.'  'Wherefore?' said Peter.
+'I belong to the church,' said I, 'and not to the congregations.'  'Oh!
+the pride of that church,' said Peter, addressing his wife in their own
+tongue, 'exemplified even in the lowest and most ignorant of its members.
+Then thou, doubtless, meanest to go to church,' said Peter, again
+addressing me; 'there is a church on the other side of that wooded hill.'
+'No,' said I, 'I do not mean to go to church.'  'May I ask thee
+wherefore?' said Peter.  'Because,' said I, 'I prefer remaining beneath
+the shade of these trees, listening to the sound of the leaves and the
+tinkling of the waters.'
+
+'Then thou intendest to remain here?' said Peter, looking fixedly at me.
+'If I do not intrude,' said I; 'but if I do, I will wander away; I wish
+to be beholden to nobody--perhaps you wish me to go?'  'On the contrary,'
+said Peter, 'I wish you to stay.  I begin to see something in thee which
+has much interest for me; but we must now bid thee farewell for the rest
+of the day, the time is drawing nigh for us to repair to the place of
+preaching; before we leave thee alone, however, I should wish to ask thee
+a question--Didst thou seek thy own destruction yesterday, and didst thou
+wilfully take that poison?'  'No,' said I; 'had I known there had been
+poison in the cake I certainly should not have taken it.'  'And who gave
+it thee?' said Peter.  'An enemy of mine,' I replied.  'Who is thy
+enemy?'  'An Egyptian sorceress and poison-monger.'  'Thy enemy is a
+female.  I fear thou hadst given her cause to hate thee--of what did she
+complain?'  'That I had stolen the tongue out of her head.'  'I do not
+understand thee--is she young?'  'About sixty-five.'
+
+Here Winifred interposed.  'Thou didst call her just now by hard names,
+young man,' said she; 'I trust thou dost bear no malice against her.'
+'No,' said I, 'I bear no malice against her.'  'Thou art not wishing to
+deliver her into the hand of what is called justice?'  'By no means,'
+said I; 'I have lived long enough upon the roads not to cry out for the
+constable when my finger is broken.  I consider this poisoning as an
+accident of the roads; one of those to which those who travel are
+occasionally subject.'  'In short, thou forgivest thine adversary?'  'Both
+now and for ever,' said I.  'Truly,' said Winifred, 'the spirit which the
+young man displayeth pleases me much; I should be loth that he left us
+yet.  I have no doubt that, with the blessing of God, and a little of thy
+exhortation, he will turn out a true Christian before he leaveth us.'  'My
+exhortation!' said Peter, and a dark shade passed over his countenance;
+'thou forgettest what I am--I--I--but I am forgetting myself; the Lord's
+will be done; and now put away the things, for I perceive that our
+friends are coming to attend us to the place of meeting.'
+
+Again the family which I had seen the night before descended the hill
+from their abode.  They were now dressed in their Sunday's best.  The
+master of the house led the way.  They presently joined us, when a quiet
+sober greeting ensued on each side.  After a little time Peter shook me
+by the hand and bade me farewell till the evening; Winifred did the same,
+adding that she hoped I should be visited by sweet and holy thoughts.  The
+whole party then moved off in the direction by which we had come the
+preceding night, Peter and the master leading the way, followed by
+Winifred and the mistress of the family.  As I gazed on their departing
+forms, I felt almost inclined to follow them to their place of worship.  I
+did not stir, however, but remained leaning against my oak with my hands
+behind me.
+
+And after a time I sat me down at the foot of the oak with my face turned
+towards the water, and, folding my hands, I fell into deep meditation.  I
+thought on the early Sabbaths of my life, and the manner in which I was
+wont to pass them.  How carefully I said my prayers when I got up on the
+Sabbath morn, and how carefully I combed my hair and brushed my clothes
+in order that I might do credit to the Sabbath day.  I thought of the old
+church at pretty D---, the dignified rector, and yet more dignified
+clerk.  I though of England's grand Liturgy, and Tate and Brady's
+sonorous minstrelsy.  I thought of the Holy Book, portions of which I was
+in the habit of reading between service.  I thought, too, of the evening
+walk which I sometimes took in fine weather like the present, with my
+mother and brother--a quiet sober walk, during which I would not break
+into a run, even to chase a butterfly, or yet more a honey-bee, being
+fully convinced of the dread importance of the day which God had
+hallowed.  And how glad I was when I had got over the Sabbath day without
+having done anything to profane it.  And how soundly I slept on the
+Sabbath night after the toil of being very good throughout the day.
+
+And when I had mused on those times a long while, I sighed and said to
+myself, I am much altered since then; am I altered for the better?  And
+then I looked at my hands and my apparel, and sighed again.  I was not
+wont of yore to appear thus on the Sabbath day.
+
+For a long time I continued in a state of deep meditation, till at last I
+lifted up my eyes to the sun, which, as usual during that glorious
+summer, was shining in unclouded majesty; and then I lowered them to the
+sparkling water, in which hundreds of the finny brood were disporting
+themselves, and then I thought what a fine thing it was to be a fish on
+such a fine summer day, and I wished myself a fish, or at least amongst
+the fishes; and then I looked at my hands again, and then, bending over
+the water, I looked at my face in the crystal mirror, and started when I
+saw it, for it looked squalid and miserable.
+
+Forthwith I started up, and said to myself, I should like to bathe and
+cleanse myself from the squalor produced by my late hard life and by Mrs.
+Herne's drow.  I wonder if there is any harm in bathing on the Sabbath
+day.  I will ask Winifred when she comes home; in the meantime I will
+bathe, provided I can find a fitting place.
+
+But the brook, though a very delightful place for fish to disport in, was
+shallow, and by no means adapted for the recreation of so large a being
+as myself; it was, moreover, exposed, though I saw nobody at hand, nor
+heard a single human voice or sound.  Following the winding of the brook,
+I left the meadow, and, passing through two or three thickets, came to a
+place where between lofty banks the water ran deep and dark, and there I
+bathed, imbibing new tone and vigour into my languid and exhausted frame.
+
+Having put on my clothes, I returned by the way I had come to my vehicle
+beneath the oak tree.  From thence, for want of something better to do, I
+strolled up the hill, on the top of which stood the farm-house; it was a
+large and commodious building built principally of stone, and seeming of
+some antiquity, with a porch, on either side of which was an oaken bench.
+On the right was seated a young woman with a book in her hand, the same
+who had brought the tray to my friends and myself.
+
+'Good-day,' said I, 'pretty damsel, sitting in the farm porch.'
+
+'Good-day,' said the girl, looking at me for a moment, and then fixing
+her eyes on her book.
+
+'That's a nice book you are reading,' said I.
+
+The girl looked at me with surprise.  'How do you know what book it is?'
+said she.
+
+'How do I know--never mind; but a nice book it is--no love, no fortune-
+telling in it.'
+
+The girl looked at me half offended.  'Fortune-telling!' said she, 'I
+should think not.  But you know nothing about it'; and she bent her head
+once more over the book.
+
+'I tell you what, young person,' said I, 'I know all about that book;
+what will you wager that I do not?'
+
+'I never wager,' said the girl.
+
+'Shall I tell you the name of it,' said I, 'O daughter of the dairy? '
+
+The girl half started.  'I should never have thought,' said she, half
+timidly, 'that you could have guessed it.'
+
+'I did not guess it,' said I, 'I knew it; and meet and proper it is that
+you should read it.'
+
+'Why so?' said the girl.
+
+'Can the daughter of the dairy read a more fitting book than the
+_Dairyman's Daughter_?'
+
+'Where do you come from?' said the girl.
+
+'Out of the water,' said I.  'Don't start, I have been bathing; are you
+fond of the water?'
+
+'No,' said the girl, heaving a sigh; 'I am not fond of the water, that
+is, of the sea'; and here she sighed again.
+
+'The sea is a wide gulf,' said I, 'and frequently separates hearts.'
+
+The girl sobbed.
+
+'Why are you alone here?' said I.
+
+'I take my turn with the rest,' said the girl, 'to keep at home on
+Sunday.'
+
+'And you are--' said I.
+
+'The master's niece!' said the girl.  'How came you to know it?  But why
+did you not go with the rest and with your friends?'
+
+'Who are those you call my friends?' said I.
+
+'Peter and his wife.'
+
+'And who are they?' said I.
+
+'Do you not know?' said the girl; 'you came with them.'
+
+'They found me ill by the way,' said I; 'and they relieved me: I know
+nothing about them.'
+
+'I thought you knew everything,' said the girl.
+
+'There are two or three things which I do not know, and this is one of
+them.  Who are they?'
+
+'Did you never hear of the great Welsh preacher, Peter Williams?'
+
+'Never,' said I.
+
+'Well,' said the girl, 'this is he, and Winifred is his wife, and a nice
+person she is.  Some people say, indeed, that she is as good a preacher
+as her husband, though of that matter I can say nothing, having never
+heard her preach.  So these two wander over all Wales and the greater
+part of England, comforting the hearts of the people with their doctrine,
+and doing all the good they can.  They frequently come here, for the
+mistress is a Welsh woman, and an old friend of both, and then they take
+up their abode in the cart beneath the old oaks down there by the
+stream.'
+
+'And what is their reason for doing so?' said I; 'would it not be more
+comfortable to sleep beneath a roof?'
+
+'I know not their reasons,' said the girl, 'but so it is; they never
+sleep beneath a roof unless the weather is very severe.  I once heard the
+mistress say that Peter had something heavy upon his mind; perhaps that
+is the cause.  If he is unhappy, all I can say is, that I wish him
+otherwise, for he is a good man and a kind--'
+
+'Thank you,' said I, 'I will now depart.'
+
+'Hem!' said the girl, 'I was wishing--'
+
+'What? to ask me a question?'
+
+'Not exactly; but you seem to know everything; you mentioned, I think,
+fortune-telling.'
+
+'Do you wish me to tell your fortune?'
+
+'By no means; but I have a friend at a distance at sea, and I should wish
+to know--'
+
+'When he will come back?  I have told you already there are two or three
+things which I do not know--this is another of them.  However, I should
+not be surprised if he were to come back some of these days; I would if I
+were in his place.  In the meantime be patient, attend to the dairy, and
+read the _Dairyman's Daughter_ when you have nothing better to do.'
+
+It was late in the evening when the party of the morning returned.  The
+farmer and his family repaired at once to their abode, and my two friends
+joined me beneath the tree.  Peter sat down at the foot of the oak, and
+said nothing.  Supper was brought by a servant, not the damsel of the
+porch.  We sat round the tray, Peter said grace, but scarcely anything
+else; he appeared sad and dejected, his wife looked anxiously upon him.  I
+was as silent as my friends; after a little time we retired to our
+separate places of rest.
+
+About midnight I was awakened by a noise; I started up and listened; it
+appeared to me that I heard voices and groans.  In a moment I had issued
+from my tent--all was silent--but the next moment I again heard groans
+and voices; they proceeded from the tilted cart where Peter and his wife
+lay; I drew near, again there was a pause, and then I heard the voice of
+Peter, in an accent of extreme anguish, exclaim, 'Pechod Ysprydd Glan--O
+pechod Ysprydd Glan!' and then he uttered a deep groan.  Anon, I heard
+the voice of Winifred, and never shall I forget the sweetness and
+gentleness of the tones of her voice in the stillness of that night.  I
+did not understand all she said--she spoke in her native language, and I
+was some way apart; she appeared to endeavour to console her husband, but
+he seemed to refuse all comfort, and, with many groans, repeated--'Pechod
+Ysprydd Glan--O pechod Ysprydd Glan!'  I felt I had no right to pry into
+their afflictions, and retired.
+
+Now 'pechod Ysprydd Glan,' interpreted, is the sin against the Holy
+Ghost.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXIV
+
+
+The following day--Pride--Thriving trade--Tylwyth Teg--Ellis Wyn--Sleeping
+hard--Incalculable good--Fearful agony--The tale.
+
+Peter and his wife did not proceed on any expedition during the following
+day.  The former strolled gloomily about the fields, and the latter
+passed many hours in the farmhouse.  Towards evening, without saying a
+word to either, I departed with my vehicle, and finding my way to a small
+town at some distance, I laid in a store of various articles, with which
+I returned.  It was night, and my two friends were seated beneath the
+oak; they had just completed their frugal supper.  'We waited for thee
+some time,' said Winifred, 'but, finding that thou didst not come, we
+began without thee; but sit down, I pray thee, there is still enough for
+thee.'  'I will sit down,' said I, 'but I require no supper, for I have
+eaten where I have been': nothing more particular occurred at the time.
+Next morning the kind pair invited me to share their breakfast.  'I will
+not share your breakfast,' said I.  'Wherefore not?' said Winifred,
+anxiously.  'Because,' said I, 'it is not proper that I be beholden to
+you for meat and drink.'  'But we are beholden to other people,' said
+Winifred.  'Yes,' said I, 'but you preach to them, and give them ghostly
+advice, which considerably alters the matter; not that I would receive
+anything from them, if I preached to them six times a day.'  'Thou art
+not fond of receiving favours, then, young man,' said Winifred.  'I am
+not,' said I.  'And of conferring favours?'  'Nothing affords me greater
+pleasure,' said I, 'than to confer favours.'  'What a disposition,' said
+Winifred, holding up her hands; 'and this is pride, genuine pride--that
+feeling which the world agrees to call so noble.  Oh, how mean a thing is
+pride! never before did I see all the meanness of what is called pride!'
+
+'But how wilt thou live, friend,' said Peter; 'dost thou not intend to
+eat?'  'When I went out last night,' said I, 'I laid in a provision.'
+'Thou hast laid in a provision!' said Peter, 'pray let us see it.  Really,
+friend,' said he, after I had produced it, 'thou must drive a thriving
+trade; here are provisions enough to last three people for several days.
+Here are butter and eggs, here is tea, here is sugar, and there is a
+flitch.  I hope thou wilt let us partake of some of thy fare.'  'I should
+be very happy if you would,' said I.  'Doubt not but we shall,' said
+Peter; 'Winifred shall have some of thy flitch cooked for dinner.  In the
+meantime, sit down, young man, and breakfast at our expense--we will dine
+at thine.'
+
+On the evening of that day, Peter and myself sat alone beneath the oak.
+We fell into conversation; Peter was at first melancholy, but he soon
+became more cheerful, fluent, and entertaining.  I spoke but little; but
+I observed that sometimes what I said surprised the good Methodist.  We
+had been silent some time.  At length, lifting up my eyes to the broad
+and leafy canopy of the trees, I said, having nothing better to remark,
+'What a noble tree!  I wonder if the fairies ever dance beneath it.'
+
+'Fairies!' said Peter, 'fairies! how came you, young man, to know
+anything about the fair family?'
+
+'I am an Englishman,' said I, 'and of course know something about
+fairies; England was once a famous place for them.'
+
+'Was once, I grant you,' said Peter, 'but is so no longer.  I have
+travelled for years about England, and never heard them mentioned before;
+the belief in them has died away, and even their name seems to be
+forgotten.  If you had said you were a Welshman, I should not have been
+surprised.  The Welsh have much to say of the Tylwyth Teg, or fair
+family, and many believe in them.'
+
+'And do you believe in them?' said I.
+
+'I scarcely know what to say.  Wise and good men have been of opinion
+that they are nothing but devils, who, under the form of pretty and
+amiable spirits, would fain allure poor human beings; I see nothing
+irrational in the supposition.'
+
+'Do you believe in devils, then?'
+
+'Do I believe in devils, young man?' said Peter, and his frame was shaken
+as if by convulsions.  'If I do not believe in devils, why am I here at
+the present moment?'
+
+'You know best,' said I; 'but I don't believe that fairies are devils,
+and I don't wish to hear them insulted.  What learned men have said they
+are devils?'
+
+'Many have said it, young man, and, amongst others, Master Ellis Wyn, in
+that wonderful book of his, the _Bardd Cwsg_.'
+
+'The _Bardd Cwsg_,' said I; 'what kind of book is that?  I have never
+heard of that book before.'
+
+'Heard of it before; I suppose not; how should you have heard of it
+before?  By the bye, can you read?'
+
+'Very tolerably,' said I; 'so there are fairies in this book.  What do
+you call it--the _Bardd Cwsg_?'
+
+'Yes, the _Bardd Cwsg_.  You pronounce Welsh very fairly; have you ever
+been in Wales?'
+
+'Never,' said I.
+
+'Not been in Wales; then, of course, you don't understand Welsh; but we
+were talking of the _Bardd Cwsg_--yes, there are fairies in the _Bardd
+Cwsg_,--the author of it, Master Ellis Wyn, was carried away in his sleep
+by them over mountains and valleys, rivers and great waters, incurring
+mighty perils at their hands, till he was rescued from them by an angel
+of the Most High, who subsequently showed him many wonderful things.'
+
+'I beg your pardon,' said I, 'but what were those wonderful things?'
+
+'I see, young man,' said Peter, smiling, 'that you are not without
+curiosity; but I can easily pardon any one for being curious about the
+wonders contained in the book of Master Ellis Wyn.  The angel showed him
+the course of this world, its pomps and vanities, its cruelty and its
+pride, its crimes and deceits.  On another occasion, the angel showed him
+Death in his nether palace, surrounded by his grisly ministers, and by
+those who are continually falling victims to his power.  And, on a third
+occasion, the state of the condemned in their place of everlasting
+torment.'
+
+'But this was all in his sleep,' said I, 'was it not?'
+
+'Yes,' said Peter, 'in his sleep; and on that account the book is called
+_Gweledigaethau y Bardd Cwsg_, or, _Visions of the Sleeping Bard_.'
+
+'I do not care for wonders which occur in sleep,' said I.  'I prefer real
+ones; and perhaps, notwithstanding what he says, the man had no visions
+at all--they are probably of his own invention.'
+
+'They are substantially true, young man,' said Peter; 'like the dreams of
+Bunyan, they are founded on three tremendous facts, Sin, Death, and Hell;
+and like his they have done incalculable good, at least in my own
+country, in the language of which they are written.  Many a guilty
+conscience has the _Bardd Cwsg_ aroused with its dreadful sights, its
+strong sighs, its puffs of smoke from the pit, and its showers of sparks
+from the mouth of the yet lower gulf of--Unknown--were it not for the
+_Bardd Cwsg_ perhaps I might not be here.'
+
+'I would sooner hear your own tale,' said I, 'than all the visions of the
+_Bardd Cwsg_.'
+
+Peter shook, bent his form nearly double, and covered his face with his
+hands.  I sat still and motionless, with my eyes fixed upon him.
+Presently Winifred descended the hill, and joined us.  'What is the
+matter?' said she, looking at her husband, who still remained in the
+posture I have described.  He made no answer; whereupon, laying her hand
+gently on his shoulder, she said, in the peculiar soft and tender tone
+which I had heard her use on a former occasion, 'Take comfort, Peter;
+what has happened now to afflict thee?'  Peter removed his hand from his
+face.  'The old pain, the old pain,' said he; 'I was talking with this
+young man, and he would fain know what brought me here, he would fain
+hear my tale, Winifred--my sin: O pechod Ysprydd Glan!  O pechod Ysprydd
+Glan!' and the poor man fell into a more fearful agony than before.  Tears
+trickled down Winifred's face, I saw them trickling by the moonlight, as
+she gazed upon the writhing form of her afflicted husband.  I arose from
+my seat.  'I am the cause of all this,' said I, 'by my folly and
+imprudence, and it is thus I have returned your kindness and hospitality;
+I will depart from you and wander my way.'  I was retiring, but Peter
+sprang up and detained me.  'Go not,' said he, 'you were not in fault; if
+there be any fault in the case it was mine; if I suffer, I am but paying
+the penalty of my own iniquity'; he then paused, and appeared to be
+considering: at length he said, 'Many things which thou hast seen and
+heard connected with me require explanation; thou wishest to know my
+tale, I will tell it thee, but not now, not to-night; I am too much
+shaken.'
+
+Two evenings later, when we were again seated beneath the oak, Peter took
+the hand of his wife in his own, and then, in tones broken and almost
+inarticulate, commenced telling me his tale--the tale of the Pechod
+Ysprydd Glan.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXV
+
+
+Taking a cup--Getting to heaven--After breakfast-- Wooden
+gallery--Mechanical habit--Reserved and gloomy--Last words--A long
+time--From the clouds--Ray of hope--Momentary chill--Pleasing
+anticipation.
+
+'I was born in the heart of North Wales, the son of a respectable farmer,
+and am the youngest of seven brothers.
+
+'My father was a member of the Church of England, and was what is
+generally called a serious man.  He went to church regularly, and read
+the Bible every Sunday evening; in his moments of leisure he was fond of
+holding religious discourse both with his family and his neighbours.
+
+'One autumn afternoon, on a week day, my father sat with one of his
+neighbours taking a cup of ale by the oak table in our stone kitchen.  I
+sat near them, and listened to their discourse.  I was at that time seven
+years of age.  They were talking of religious matters.  "It is a hard
+matter to get to heaven," said my father.  "Exceedingly so," said the
+other.  "However, I don't despond; none need despair of getting to
+heaven, save those who have committed the sin against the Holy Ghost."
+
+'"Ah!" said my father, "thank God I never committed that--how awful must
+be the state of a person who has committed the sin against the Holy
+Ghost.  I can scarcely think of it without my hair standing on end"; and
+then my father and his friend began talking of the nature of the sin
+against the Holy Ghost, and I heard them say what it was, as I sat with
+greedy ears listening to their discourse.
+
+'I lay awake the greater part of the night musing upon what I had heard.
+I kept wondering to myself what must be the state of a person who had
+committed the sin against the Holy Ghost, and how he must feel.  Once or
+twice I felt a strong inclination to commit it, a strange kind of fear,
+however, prevented me; at last I determined not to commit it, and, having
+said my prayers, I fell asleep.
+
+'When I awoke in the morning the first thing I thought of was the
+mysterious sin, and a voice within me seemed to say, "Commit it"; and I
+felt a strong temptation to do so, even stronger than in the night.  I
+was just about to yield, when the same dread, of which I have already
+spoken, came over me, and, springing out of bed, I went down on my knees.
+I slept in a small room alone, to which I ascended by a wooden stair,
+open to the sky.  I have often thought since that it is not a good thing
+for children to sleep alone.
+
+'After breakfast I went to school, and endeavoured to employ myself upon
+my tasks, but all in vain; I could think of nothing but the sin against
+the Holy Ghost; my eyes, instead of being fixed upon my book, wandered in
+vacancy.  My master observed my inattention, and chid me.  The time came
+for saying my task, and I had not acquired it.  My master reproached me,
+and, yet more, he beat me; I felt shame and anger, and I went home with a
+full determination to commit the sin against the Holy Ghost.
+
+'But when I got home my father ordered me to do something connected with
+the farm, so that I was compelled to exert myself; I was occupied till
+night, and was so busy that I almost forgot the sin and my late
+resolution.  My work completed, I took my supper, and went to my room; I
+began my prayers, and, when they were ended, I thought of the sin, but
+the temptation was slight, I felt very tired, and was presently asleep.
+
+'Thus, you see, I had plenty of time allotted me by a gracious and kind
+God to reflect on what I was about to do.  He did not permit the enemy of
+souls to take me by surprise, and to hurry me at once into the commission
+of that which was to be my ruin here and hereafter.  Whatever I did was
+of my own free will, after I had had time to reflect.  Thus God is
+justified; He had no hand in my destruction, but, on the contrary, He did
+all that was compatible with justice to prevent it.  I hasten to the
+fatal moment.  Awaking in the night, I determined that nothing should
+prevent my committing the sin.  Arising from my bed, I went out upon the
+wooden gallery; and having stood for a few moments looking at the stars,
+with which the heavens were thickly strewn, I laid myself down, and
+supporting my face with my hand, I murmured out words of horror, words
+not to be repeated, and in this manner I committed the sin against the
+Holy Ghost.
+
+'When the words were uttered I sat up upon the topmost step of the
+gallery; for some time I felt stunned in somewhat the same manner as I
+once subsequently felt after being stung by an adder.  I soon arose,
+however, and retired to my bed, where, notwithstanding what I had done, I
+was not slow in falling asleep.
+
+'I awoke several times during the night, each time with the dim idea that
+something strange and monstrous had occurred, but I presently fell asleep
+again; in the morning I awoke with the same vague feeling, but presently
+recollection returned, and I remembered that I had committed the sin
+against the Holy Ghost.  I lay musing for some time on what I had done,
+and I felt rather stunned, as before; at last I arose and got out of bed,
+dressed myself, and then went down on my knees, and was about to pray
+from the force of mechanical habit; before I said a word, however, I
+recollected myself, and got up again.  What was the use of praying?  I
+thought; I had committed the sin against the Holy Ghost.
+
+'I went to school, but sat stupefied.  I was again chidden, again beaten,
+by my master.  I felt no anger this time, and scarcely heeded the
+strokes.  I looked, however, at my master's face, and thought to myself,
+you are beating me for being idle, as you suppose; poor man, what would
+you do if you knew I had committed the sin against the Holy Ghost?
+
+'Days and weeks passed by.  I had once been cheerful, and fond of the
+society of children of my own age; but I was now reserved and gloomy.  It
+seemed to me that a gulf separated me from all my fellow-creatures.  I
+used to look at my brothers and schoolfellows, and think how different I
+was from them; they had not done what I had.  I seemed, in my own eyes, a
+lone monstrous being, and yet, strange to say, I felt a kind of pride in
+being so.  I was unhappy, but I frequently thought to myself, I have done
+what no one else would dare to do; there was something grand in the idea;
+I had yet to learn the horror of my condition.
+
+'Time passed on, and I began to think less of what I had done; I began
+once more to take pleasure in my childish sports; I was active, and
+excelled at football and the like all the lads of my age.  I likewise
+began, what I had never done before, to take pleasure in the exercises of
+the school.  I made great progress in Welsh and English grammar, and
+learnt to construe Latin.  My master no longer chid or beat me, but one
+day told my father that he had no doubt that one day I should be an
+honour to Wales.
+
+'Shortly after this my father fell sick; the progress of the disorder was
+rapid; feeling his end approaching, he called his children before him.
+After tenderly embracing us, he said "God bless you, my children, I am
+going from you, but take comfort, I trust that we shall all meet again in
+heaven."
+
+'As he uttered these last words, horror took entire possession of me.
+Meet my father in heaven,--how could I ever hope to meet him there?  I
+looked wildly at my brethren and at my mother; they were all bathed in
+tears, but how I envied them.  They might hope to meet my father in
+heaven, but how different were they from me, they had never committed the
+unpardonable sin.
+
+'In a few days my father died; he left his family in comfortable
+circumstances, at least such as would be considered so in Wales, where
+the wants of the people are few.  My elder brother carried on the farm
+for the benefit of my mother and us all.  In course of time my brothers
+were put out to various trades.  I still remained at school, but without
+being a source of expense to my relations, as I was by this time able to
+assist my master in the business of the school.
+
+'I was diligent both in self-improvement and in the instruction of
+others; nevertheless, a horrible weight pressed upon my breast; I knew I
+was a lost being; that for me there was no hope; that, though all others
+might be saved, I must of necessity be lost; I had committed the
+unpardonable sin, for which I was doomed to eternal punishment, in the
+flaming gulf, as soon as life was over!--and how long could I hope to
+live? perhaps fifty years; at the end of which I must go to my place; and
+then I would count the months and the days, nay, even the hours, which
+yet intervened between me and my doom.  Sometimes I would comfort myself
+with the idea that a long time would elapse before my time would be out;
+but then again I thought that, however long the term might be, it must be
+out at last; and then I would fall into an agony, during which I would
+almost wish that the term were out, and that I were in my place; the
+horrors of which I thought could scarcely be worse than what I then
+endured.
+
+'There was one thought about this time which caused me unutterable grief
+and shame, perhaps more shame than grief.  It was that my father, who was
+gone to heaven, and was there daily holding communion with his God, was
+by this time aware of my crime.  I imagined him looking down from the
+clouds upon his wretched son, with a countenance of inexpressible horror.
+When this idea was upon me, I would often rush to some secret place to
+hide myself; to some thicket, where I would cast myself on the ground,
+and thrust my head into a thick bush, in order to escape from the horror-
+struck glance of my father above in the clouds; and there I would
+continue groaning till the agony had, in some degree, passed away.
+
+'The wretchedness of my state increasing daily, it at last became
+apparent to the master of the school, who questioned me earnestly and
+affectionately.  I, however, gave him no satisfactory answer, being
+apprehensive that, if I unbosomed myself, I should become as much an
+object of horror to him as I had long been to myself.  At length he
+suspected that I was unsettled in my intellects; and, fearing probably
+the ill effect of my presence upon his scholars, he advised me to go
+home; which I was glad to do, as I felt myself every day becoming less
+qualified for the duties of the office which I had undertaken.
+
+'So I returned home to my mother and my brother, who received me with the
+greatest kindness and affection.  I now determined to devote myself to
+husbandry, and assist my brother in the business of the farm.  I was
+still, however, very much distressed.  One fine morning, however, as I
+was at work in the field, and the birds were carolling around me, a ray
+of hope began to break upon my poor dark soul.  I looked at the earth and
+looked at the sky, and felt as I had not done for many a year; presently
+a delicious feeling stole over me.  I was beginning to enjoy existence.  I
+shall never forget that hour.  I flung myself on the soil, and kissed it;
+then, springing up with a sudden impulse, I rushed into the depths of a
+neighbouring wood, and, falling upon my knees, did what I had not done
+for a long, long time--prayed to God.
+
+'A change, an entire change, seemed to have come over me.  I was no
+longer gloomy and despairing, but gay and happy.  My slumbers were light
+and easy; not disturbed, as before, by frightful dreams.  I arose with
+the lark, and like him uttered a cheerful song of praise to God,
+frequently and earnestly, and was particularly cautious not to do
+anything which I considered might cause His displeasure.
+
+'At church I was constant, and when there listened with deepest attention
+to every word which proceeded from the mouth of the minister.  In a
+little time it appeared to me that I had become a good, very good, young
+man.  At times the recollection of the sin would return, and I would feel
+a momentary chill; but the thought quickly vanished, and I again felt
+happy and secure.
+
+'One Sunday morning, after I had said my prayers, I felt particularly
+joyous.  I thought of the innocent and virtuous life I was leading; and
+when the recollection of the sin intruded for a moment, said, "I am sure
+God will never utterly cast away so good a creature as myself."  I went
+to church, and was as usual attentive.  The subject of the sermon was on
+the duty of searching the Scriptures: all I knew of them was from the
+liturgy.  I now, however, determined to read them, and perfect the good
+work which I had begun.  My father's Bible was upon the shelf, and on
+that evening I took it with me to my chamber.  I placed it on the table,
+and sat down.  My heart was filled with pleasing anticipation.  I opened
+the book at random, and began to read; the first passage on which my eyes
+lighted was the following:--
+
+'"He who committeth the sin against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven,
+either in this world or the next."'
+
+Here Peter was seized with convulsive tremors.  Winifred sobbed
+violently.  I got up, and went away.  Returning in about a quarter of an
+hour, I found him more calm; he motioned me to sit down; and, after a
+short pause, continued his narration.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXVI
+
+
+Hasty farewell--Lofty rock--Wrestlings of Jacob--No rest--Ways of
+Providence--Two females--Foot of the Cross--Enemy of
+souls--Perplexed--Lucky hour--Valetudinarian--Methodists--Fervent in
+prayer--You Saxons--Weak creatures--Very agreeable--Almost happy--Kindness
+and solicitude.
+
+'Where was I, young man?  Oh, I remember, at the fatal passage which
+removed all hope.  I will not dwell on what I felt.  I closed my eyes,
+and wished that I might be dreaming; but it was no dream, but a terrific
+reality: I will not dwell on that period, I should only shock you.  I
+could not bear my feelings; so, bidding my friends a hasty farewell, I
+abandoned myself to horror and despair, and ran wild through Wales,
+climbing mountains and wading streams.
+
+'Climbing mountains and wading streams, I ran wild about, I was burnt by
+the sun, drenched by the rain, and had frequently at night no other
+covering than the sky, or the humid roof of some cave; but nothing seemed
+to affect my constitution; probably the fire which burned within me
+counteracted what I suffered from without.  During the space of three
+years I scarcely knew what befell me; my life was a dream--a wild,
+horrible dream; more than once I believe I was in the hands of robbers,
+and once in the hands of gypsies.  I liked the last description of people
+least of all; I could not abide their yellow faces, or their ceaseless
+clabber.  Escaping from these beings, whose countenances and godless
+discourse brought to my mind the demons of the deep Unknown, I still ran
+wild through Wales, I know not how long.  On one occasion, coming in some
+degree to my recollection, I felt myself quite unable to bear the horrors
+of my situation; looking round I found myself near the sea; instantly the
+idea came into my head that I would cast myself into it, and thus
+anticipate my final doom.  I hesitated a moment, but a voice within me
+seemed to tell me that I could do no better; the sea was near, and I
+could not swim, so I determined to fling myself into the sea.  As I was
+running along at great speed, in the direction of a lofty rock, which
+beetled over the waters, I suddenly felt myself seized by the coat.  I
+strove to tear myself away, but in vain; looking round, I perceived a
+venerable hale old man, who had hold of me.  "Let me go!" said I,
+fiercely.  "I will not let thee go," said the old man, and now, instead
+of with one, he grappled me with both hands.  "In whose name dost thou
+detain me?" said I, scarcely knowing what I said.  "In the name of my
+Master, who made thee and yonder sea; and has said to the sea, So far
+shalt thou come, and no farther, and to thee, Thou shalt do no murder."
+"Has not a man a right to do what he pleases with his own?" said I.  "He
+has," said the old man, "but thy life is not thy own; thou art
+accountable for it to thy God.  Nay, I will not let thee go," he
+continued, as I again struggled; "if thou struggle with me the whole day
+I will not let thee go, as Charles Wesley says, in his 'Wrestlings of
+Jacob'; and see, it is of no use struggling, for I am, in the strength of
+my Master, stronger than thou"; and indeed, all of a sudden I had become
+very weak and exhausted; whereupon the old man, beholding my situation,
+took me by the arm and led me gently to a neighbouring town, which stood
+behind a hill, and which I had not before observed; presently he opened
+the door of a respectable-looking house, which stood beside a large
+building having the appearance of a chapel, and conducted me into a small
+room, with a great many books in it.  Having caused me to sit down, he
+stood looking at me for some time, occasionally heaving a sigh.  I was,
+indeed, haggard and forlorn.  "Who art thou?" he said at last.  "A
+miserable man," I replied.  "What makes thee miserable?" said the old
+man.  "A hideous crime," I replied.  "I can find no rest; like Cain I
+wander here and there."  The old man turned pale.  "Hast thou taken
+another's life?" said he; "if so, I advise thee to surrender thyself to
+the magistrate; thou canst do no better; thy doing so will be the best
+proof of thy repentance; and though there be no hope for thee in this
+world there may be much in the next."  "No," said I, "I have never taken
+another's life."  "What then, another's goods?  If so, restore them
+sevenfold, if possible: or, if it be not in thy power, and thy conscience
+accuse thee, surrender thyself to the magistrate, and make the only
+satisfaction thou art able."  "I have taken no one's goods," said I.  "Of
+what art thou guilty, then?" said he.  "Art thou a drunkard? a
+profligate?"  "Alas, no," said I; "I am neither of these; would that I
+were no worse."
+
+'Thereupon the old man looked steadfastly at me for some time; then,
+after appearing to reflect, he said, "Young man, I have a great desire to
+know your name."  "What matters it to you what is my name?" said I; "you
+know nothing of me."  "Perhaps you are mistaken," said the old man,
+looking kindly at me; "but at all events tell me your name."  I hesitated
+a moment, and then told him who I was, whereupon he exclaimed with much
+emotion, "I thought so; how wonderful are the ways of Providence.  I have
+heard of thee, young man, and know thy mother well.  Only a month ago,
+when upon a journey, I experienced much kindness from her.  She was
+speaking to me of her lost child, with tears; she told me that you were
+one of the best of sons, but that some strange idea appeared to have
+occupied your mind.  Despair not, my son.  If thou hast been afflicted, I
+doubt not but that thy affliction will eventually turn out to thy
+benefit; I doubt not but that thou wilt be preserved, as an example of
+the great mercy of God.  I will now kneel down and pray for thee, my
+son."
+
+'He knelt down, and prayed long and fervently.  I remained standing for
+some time; at length I knelt down likewise.  I scarcely knew what he was
+saying, but when he concluded I said "Amen."
+
+'And when we had risen from our knees, the old man left me for a short
+time, and on his return led me into another room, where were two females;
+one was an elderly person, the wife of the old man,--the other was a
+young woman of very prepossessing appearance (hang not down thy head,
+Winifred), who I soon found was a distant relation of the old man,--both
+received me with great kindness, the old man having doubtless previously
+told them who I was.
+
+'I stayed several days in the good man's house.  I had still the greater
+portion of a small sum which I happened to have about me when I departed
+on my dolorous wandering, and with this I purchased clothes, and altered
+my appearance considerably.  On the evening of the second day my friend
+said, "I am going to preach, perhaps you will come and hear me."  I
+consented, and we all went, not to a church, but to the large building
+next the house; for the old man, though a clergyman, was not of the
+established persuasion, and there the old man mounted a pulpit, and began
+to preach.  "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden," etc.
+etc., was his text.  His sermon was long, but I still bear the greater
+portion of it in my mind.
+
+'The substance of it was that Jesus was at all times ready to take upon
+Himself the burden of our sins, provided we came to Him with a humble and
+contrite spirit, and begged His help.  This doctrine was new to me; I had
+often been at church, but had never heard it preached before, at least so
+distinctly.  When he said that all men might be saved, I shook, for I
+expected he would add, all except those who had committed the mysterious
+sin; but no, all men were to be saved who with a humble and contrite
+spirit would come to Jesus, cast themselves at the foot of His cross, and
+accept pardon through the merits of His blood-shedding alone.  "Therefore,
+my friends," said he, in conclusion, "despair not--however guilty you may
+be, despair not--however desperate your condition may seem," said he,
+fixing his eyes upon me, "despair not.  There is nothing more foolish and
+more wicked than despair; over-weening confidence is not more foolish
+than despair; both are the favourite weapons of the enemy of souls."
+
+'This discourse gave rise in my mind to no slight perplexity.  I had read
+in the Scriptures that he who committeth a certain sin shall never be
+forgiven, and that there is no hope for him either in this world or the
+next.  And here was a man, a good man certainly, and one who, of
+necessity, was thoroughly acquainted with the Scriptures, who told me
+that any one might be forgiven, however wicked, who would only trust in
+Christ and in the merits of His blood-shedding.  Did I believe in Christ?
+Ay, truly.  Was I willing to be saved by Christ?  Ay, truly.  Did I trust
+in Christ?  I trusted that Christ would save every one but myself.  And
+why not myself? simply because the Scriptures had told me that he who has
+committed the sin against the Holy Ghost can never be saved, and I had
+committed the sin against the Holy Ghost,--perhaps the only one who ever
+had committed it.  How could I hope?  The Scriptures could not lie, and
+yet here was this good old man, profoundly versed in the Scriptures, who
+bade me hope; would he lie?  No.  But did the old man know my case?  Ah,
+no, he did not know my case! but yet he had bid me hope, whatever I had
+done, provided I would go to Jesus.  But how could I think of going to
+Jesus, when the Scriptures told me plainly that all would be useless?  I
+was perplexed, and yet a ray of hope began to dawn in my soul.  I thought
+of consulting the good man, but I was afraid he would drive away the
+small glimmer.  I was afraid he would say, "Oh yes, every one is to be
+saved, except a wretch like you; I was not aware before that there was
+anything so horrible,--begone!"  Once or twice the old man questioned me
+on the subject of my misery, but I evaded him; once, indeed, when he
+looked particularly benevolent, I think I should have unbosomed myself to
+him, but we were interrupted.  He never pressed me much; perhaps he was
+delicate in probing my mind, as we were then of different persuasions.
+Hence he advised me to seek the advice of some powerful minister in my
+own church; there were many such in it, he said.
+
+'I stayed several days in the family, during which time I more than once
+heard my venerable friend preach; each time he preached, he exhorted his
+hearers not to despair.  The whole family were kind to me; his wife
+frequently discoursed with me, and also the young person to whom I have
+already alluded.  It appeared to me that the latter took a peculiar
+interest in my fate.
+
+'At last my friend said to me, "It is now time thou shouldest return to
+thy mother and thy brother."  So I arose, and departed to my mother and
+my brother; and at my departure my old friend gave me his blessing, and
+his wife and the young person shed tears, the last especially.  And when
+my mother saw me, she shed tears, and fell on my neck and kissed me, and
+my brother took me by the hand and bade me welcome; and when our first
+emotions were subsided, my mother said, "I trust thou art come in a lucky
+hour.  A few weeks ago my cousin (whose favourite thou always wast) died
+and left thee his heir--left thee the goodly farm in which he lived.  I
+trust, my son, that thou wilt now settle, and be a comfort to me in my
+old days."  And I answered, "I will, if so please the Lord"; and I said
+to myself, "God grant that this bequest be a token of the Lord's favour."
+
+'And in a few days I departed to take possession of my farm; it was about
+twenty miles from my mother's house, in a beautiful but rather wild
+district; I arrived at the fall of the leaf.  All day long I busied
+myself with my farm, and thus kept my mind employed.  At night, however,
+I felt rather solitary, and I frequently wished for a companion.  Each
+night and morning I prayed fervently unto the Lord; for His hand had been
+very heavy upon me, and I feared Him.
+
+'There was one thing connected with my new abode which gave me
+considerable uneasiness--the want of spiritual instruction.  There was a
+church, indeed, close at hand, in which service was occasionally
+performed, but in so hurried and heartless a manner that I derived little
+benefit from it.  The clergyman to whom the benefice belonged was a
+valetudinarian, who passed his time in London, or at some watering-place,
+entrusting the care of his flock to the curate of a distant parish, who
+gave himself very little trouble about the matter.  Now I wanted every
+Sunday to hear from the pulpit words of consolation and encouragement,
+similar to those which I had heard uttered from the pulpit by my good and
+venerable friend, but I was debarred from this privilege.  At length, one
+day being in conversation with one of my labourers, a staid and serious
+man, I spoke to him of the matter which lay heavy upon my mind;
+whereupon, looking me wistfully in the face, he said, "Master, the want
+of religious instruction in my church was what drove me to the
+Methodists."  "The Methodists," said I, "are there any in these parts?"
+"There is a chapel," said he, "only half a mile distant, at which there
+are two services every Sunday, and other two during the week."  Now it
+happened that my venerable friend was of the Methodist persuasion, and
+when I heard the poor man talk in this manner, I said to him, "May I go
+with you next Sunday?"  "Why not?" said he; so I went with the labourer
+on the ensuing Sabbath to the meeting of the Methodists.
+
+'I liked the preaching which I heard at the chapel very well, though it
+was not quite so comfortable as that of my old friend, the preacher being
+in some respects a different kind of man.  It, however, did me good, and
+I went again, and continued to do so, though I did not become a regular
+member of the body at that time.
+
+'I had now the benefit of religious instruction, and also to a certain
+extent of religious fellowship, for the preacher and various members of
+his flock frequently came to see me.  They were honest plain men, not
+exactly of the description which I wished for, but still good sort of
+people, and I was glad to see them.  Once on a time, when some of them
+were with me, one of them inquired whether I was fervent in prayer.  "Very
+fervent," said I.  "And do you read the Scriptures often?" said he.  "No,"
+said I.  "Why not?" said he.  "Because I am afraid to see there my own
+condemnation."  They looked at each other, and said nothing at the time.
+On leaving me, however, they all advised me to read the Scriptures with
+fervency and prayer.
+
+'As I had told these honest people, I shrank from searching the
+Scriptures; the remembrance of the fatal passage was still too vivid in
+my mind to permit me.  I did not wish to see my condemnation repeated,
+but I was very fervent in prayer, and almost hoped that God would yet
+forgive me by virtue of the blood-shedding of the Lamb.  Time passed on,
+my affairs prospered, and I enjoyed a certain portion of tranquillity.
+Occasionally, when I had nothing else to do, I renewed my studies.  Many
+is the book I read, especially in my native language, for I was always
+fond of my native language, and proud of being a Welshman.  Amongst the
+books I read were the odes of the great Ab Gwilym, whom thou, friend,
+hast never heard of; no, nor any of thy countrymen, for you are an
+ignorant race, you Saxons, at least with respect to all that relates to
+Wales and Welshmen.  I likewise read the book of Master Ellis Wyn.  The
+latter work possessed a singular fascination for me, on account of its
+wonderful delineations of the torments of the nether world.
+
+'But man does not love to be alone; indeed, the Scripture says that it is
+not good for man to be alone.  I occupied my body with the pursuits of
+husbandry, and I improved my mind with the perusal of good and wise
+books; but, as I have already said, I frequently sighed for a companion
+with whom I could exchange ideas, and who could take an interest in my
+pursuits; the want of such a one I more particularly felt in the long
+winter evenings.  It was then that the image of the young person whom I
+had seen in the house of the preacher frequently rose up distinctly
+before my mind's eye, decked with quiet graces--hang not down your head,
+Winifred--and I thought that of all the women in the world I should wish
+her to be my partner, and then I considered whether it would be possible
+to obtain her.  I am ready to acknowledge, friend, that it was both
+selfish and wicked in me to wish to fetter any human being to a lost
+creature like myself, conscious of having committed a crime for which the
+Scriptures told me there is no pardon.  I had, indeed, a long struggle as
+to whether I should make the attempt or not--selfishness however
+prevailed.  I will not detain your attention with relating all that
+occurred at this period--suffice it to say that I made my suit and was
+successful; it is true that the old man, who was her guardian, hesitated,
+and asked several questions respecting my state of mind.  I am afraid
+that I partly deceived him, perhaps he partly deceived himself; he was
+pleased that I had adopted his profession--we are all weak creatures.
+With respect to the young person, she did not ask many questions; and I
+soon found that I had won her heart.  To be brief, I married her; and
+here she is, the truest wife that ever man had, and the kindest.  Kind I
+may well call her, seeing that she shrinks not from me, who so cruelly
+deceived her, in not telling her at first what I was.  I married her,
+friend; and brought her home to my little possession, where we passed our
+time very agreeably.  Our affairs prospered, our garners were full, and
+there was coin in our purse.  I worked in the field; Winifred busied
+herself with the dairy.  At night I frequently read books to her, books
+of my own country, friend; I likewise read to her songs of my own, holy
+songs and carols which she admired, and which yourself would perhaps
+admire, could you understand them; but I repeat, you Saxons are an
+ignorant people with respect to us, and a perverse, inasmuch as you
+despise Welsh without understanding it.  Every night I prayed fervently,
+and my wife admired my gift of prayer.
+
+'One night, after I had been reading to my wife a portion of Ellis Wyn,
+my wife said, "This is a wonderful book, and containing much true and
+pleasant doctrine; but how is it that you, who are so fond of good books,
+and good things in general, never read the Bible?  You read me the book
+of Master Ellis Wyn, you read me sweet songs of your own composition, you
+edify me with your gift of prayer, but yet you never read the Bible."  And
+when I heard her mention the Bible I shook, for I thought of my own
+condemnation.  However, I dearly loved my wife, and as she pressed me, I
+commenced on that very night reading the Bible.  All went on smoothly for
+a long time; for months and months I did not find the fatal passage, so
+that I almost thought that I had imagined it.  My affairs prospered much
+the while, so that I was almost happy,--taking pleasure in everything
+around me,--in my wife, in my farm, my books and compositions, and the
+Welsh language; till one night, as I was reading the Bible, feeling
+particularly comfortable, a thought having just come into my head that I
+would print some of my compositions, and purchase a particular field of a
+neighbour--O God--God!  I came to the fatal passage.
+
+'Friend, friend, what shall I say?  I rushed out.  My wife followed me,
+asking me what was the matter.  I could only answer with groans--for
+three days and three nights I did little else than groan.  Oh the
+kindness and solicitude of my wife!  "What is the matter husband, dear
+husband?" she was continually saying.  I became at last more calm.  My
+wife still persisted in asking me the cause of my late paroxysm.  It is
+hard to keep a secret from a wife, especially such a wife as mine, so I
+told my wife the tale, as we sat one night--it was a mid-winter
+night--over the dying brands of our hearth, after the family had retired
+to rest, her hand locked in mine, even as it is now.
+
+'I thought she would have shrunk from me with horror; but she did not;
+her hand, it is true, trembled once or twice; but that was all.  At last
+she gave mine a gentle pressure; and, looking up in my face, she
+said--what do you think my wife said, young man?'
+
+'It is impossible for me to guess,' said I.
+
+"Let us go to rest, my love; your fears are all groundless."'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXVII
+
+
+Getting late--Seven years old--Chastening--Go forth--London Bridge--Same
+eyes--Common occurrence--Very sleepy.
+
+'And so I still say,' said Winifred, sobbing.  'Let us retire to rest,
+dear husband; your fears are groundless.  I had hoped long since that
+your affliction would have passed away, and I still hope that it
+eventually will; so take heart, Peter, and let us retire to rest, for it
+is getting late.'
+
+'Rest!' said Peter; 'there is no rest for the wicked!'
+
+'We are all wicked,' said Winifred; 'but you are afraid of a shadow.  How
+often have I told you that the sin of your heart is not the sin against
+the Holy Ghost: the sin of your heart is its natural pride, of which you
+are scarcely aware, to keep down which God in His mercy permitted you to
+be terrified with the idea of having committed a sin which you never
+committed.'
+
+'Then you will still maintain,' said Peter, 'that I never committed the
+sin against the Holy Spirit?'
+
+'I will,' said Winifred; 'you never committed it.  How should a child
+seven years old commit a sin like that?'
+
+'Have I not read my own condemnation?' said Peter.  'Did not the first
+words which I read in the Holy Scripture condemn me?  "He who committeth
+the sin against the Holy Ghost shall never enter into the kingdom of
+God."'
+
+'You never committed it,' said Winifred.
+
+'But the words! the words! the words!' said Peter.
+
+'The words are true words,' said Winifred, sobbing; 'but they were not
+meant for you, but for those who have broken their profession, who,
+having embraced the cross, have receded from their Master.'
+
+'And what sayst thou to the effect which the words produced upon me?'
+said Peter.  'Did they not cause me to run wild through Wales for years,
+like Merddin Wyllt of yore; thinkest thou that I opened the book at that
+particular passage by chance?'
+
+'No,' said Winifred, 'not by chance; it was the hand of God directed you,
+doubtless for some wise purpose.  You had become satisfied with yourself.
+The Lord wished to rouse thee from thy state of carnal security, and
+therefore directed your eyes to that fearful passage.'
+
+'Does the Lord then carry out His designs by means of guile?' said Peter
+with a groan.  'Is not the Lord true?  Would the Lord impress upon me
+that I had committed a sin of which I am guiltless?  Hush, Winifred!
+hush! thou knowest that I have committed the sin.'
+
+'Thou hast not committed it,' said Winifred, sobbing yet more violently.
+'Were they my last words, I would persist that thou hast not committed
+it, though, perhaps, thou wouldst, but for this chastening; it was not to
+convince thee that thou hast committed the sin, but rather to prevent
+thee from committing it, that the Lord brought that passage before thy
+eyes.  He is not to blame, if thou art wilfully blind to the truth and
+wisdom of His ways.'
+
+'I see thou wouldst comfort me,' said Peter, 'as thou hast often before
+attempted to do.  I would fain ask the young man his opinion.'
+
+'I have not yet heard the whole of your history,' said I.
+
+'My story is nearly told,' said Peter; 'a few words will complete it.  My
+wife endeavoured to console and reassure me, using the arguments which
+you have just heard her use, and many others, but in vain.  Peace nor
+comfort came to my breast.  I was rapidly falling into the depths of
+despair; when one day Winifred said to me, "I see thou wilt be lost, if
+we remain here.  One resource only remains.  Thou must go forth, my
+husband, into the wide world, and to comfort thee I will go with thee."
+"And what can I do in the wide world?" said I, despondingly.  "Much,"
+replied Winifred, "if you will but exert yourself; much good canst thou
+do with the blessing of God."  Many things of the same kind she said to
+me; and at last I arose from the earth to which God had smitten me, and
+disposed of my property in the best way I could, and went into the world.
+We did all the good we were able, visiting the sick, ministering to the
+sick, and praying with the sick.  At last I became celebrated as the
+possessor of a great gift of prayer.  And people urged me to preach, and
+Winifred urged me too, and at last I consented, and I preached.
+I--I--outcast Peter, became the preacher Peter Williams.  I, the lost
+one, attempted to show others the right road.  And in this way I have
+gone on for thirteen years, preaching and teaching, visiting the sick,
+and ministering to them, with Winifred by my side heartening me on.
+Occasionally I am visited with fits of indescribable agony, generally on
+the night before the Sabbath; for I then ask myself, how dare I, the
+outcast, attempt to preach the word of God?  Young man, my tale is told;
+you seem in thought!'
+
+'I am thinking of London Bridge,' said I.
+
+'Of London Bridge!' said Peter and his wife.
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'of London Bridge.  I am indebted for much wisdom to
+London Bridge; it was there that I completed my studies.  But to the
+point.  I was once reading on London Bridge a book which an ancient
+gentlewoman, who kept the bridge, was in the habit of lending me; and
+there I found written, "Each one carries in his breast the recollection
+of some sin which presses heavy upon him.  Oh, if men could but look into
+each other's hearts, what blackness would they find there!"'
+
+'That's true,' said Peter.  'What is the name of the book?'
+
+'_The Life of Blessed Mary Flanders_.'
+
+'Some popish saint, I suppose,' said Peter.
+
+'As much of a saint, I daresay,' said I, 'as most popish ones; but you
+interrupted me.  One part of your narrative brought the passage which I
+have quoted into my mind.  You said that after you had committed this
+same sin of yours you were in the habit, at school, of looking upon your
+schoolfellows with a kind of gloomy superiority, considering yourself a
+lone monstrous being who had committed a sin far above the daring of any
+of them.  Are you sure that many others of your schoolfellows were not
+looking upon you and the others with much the same eyes with which you
+were looking upon them?'
+
+'How!' said Peter, 'dost thou think that they had divined my secret?'
+
+'Not they,' said I, 'they were, I daresay, thinking too much of
+themselves and of their own concerns to have divined any secrets of
+yours.  All I mean to say is, they had probably secrets of their own, and
+who knows that the secret sin of more than one of them was not the very
+sin which caused you so much misery?'
+
+'Dost thou then imagine,' said Peter, 'the sin against the Holy Ghost to
+be so common an occurrence?'
+
+'As you have described it,' said I, 'of very common occurrence,
+especially amongst children, who are, indeed, the only beings likely to
+commit it.'
+
+'Truly,' said Winifred, 'the young man talks wisely.'
+
+Peter was silent for some moments, and appeared to be reflecting; at
+last, suddenly raising his head, he looked me full in the face, and,
+grasping my hand with vehemence, he said, 'Tell me, young man, only one
+thing, hast thou, too, committed the sin against the Holy Ghost?'
+
+'I am neither Papist nor Methodist,' said I, 'but of the Church, and,
+being so, confess myself to no one, but keep my own counsel; I will tell
+thee, however, had I committed, at the same age, twenty such sins as that
+which you committed, I should feel no uneasiness at these years--but I am
+sleepy, and must go to rest.'
+
+'God bless thee, young man,' said Winifred.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXVIII
+
+
+Low and calm--Much better--Blessed effect--No answer--Such a sermon.
+
+Before I sank to rest I heard Winifred and her husband conversing in the
+place where I had left them; both their voices were low and calm.  I soon
+fell asleep, and slumbered for some time.  On my awakening I again heard
+them conversing, but they were now in their cart; still the voices of
+both were calm.  I heard no passionate bursts of wild despair on the part
+of the man.  Methought I occasionally heard the word Pechod proceeding
+from the lips of each, but with no particular emphasis.  I supposed they
+were talking of the innate sin of both their hearts.
+
+'I wish that man were happy,' said I to myself, 'were it only for his
+wife's sake, and yet he deserves to be happy for his own.'
+
+The next day Peter was very cheerful, more cheerful than I had ever seen
+him.  At breakfast his conversation was animated, and he smiled
+repeatedly.  I looked at him with the greatest interest, and the eyes of
+his wife were almost constantly fixed upon him.  A shade of gloom would
+occasionally come over his countenance, but it almost instantly
+disappeared; perhaps it proceeded more from habit than anything else.
+After breakfast he took his Welsh Bible and sat down beneath a tree.  His
+eyes were soon fixed intently on the volume; now and then he would call
+his wife, show her some passage, and appeared to consult with her.  The
+day passed quickly and comfortably.
+
+'Your husband seems much better,' said I, at evening fall, to Winifred,
+as we chanced to be alone.
+
+'He does,' said Winifred; 'and that on the day of the week when he was
+wont to appear most melancholy, for to-morrow is the Sabbath.  He now no
+longer looks forward to the Sabbath with dread, but appears to reckon on
+it.  What a happy change! and to think that this change should have been
+produced by a few words, seemingly careless ones, proceeding from the
+mouth of one who is almost a stranger to him.  Truly, it is wonderful.'
+
+'To whom do you allude,' said I; 'and to what words?'
+
+'To yourself, and to the words which came from your lips last night,
+after you had heard my poor husband's history.  Those strange words,
+drawn out with so much seeming indifference, have produced in my husband
+the blessed effect which you have observed.  They have altered the
+current of his ideas.  He no longer thinks himself the only being in the
+world doomed to destruction,--the only being capable of committing the
+never-to-be-forgiven sin.  Your supposition that that which harrowed his
+soul is of frequent occurrence amongst children has tranquillised him;
+the mist which hung over his mind has cleared away, and he begins to see
+the groundlessness of his apprehensions.  The Lord has permitted him to
+be chastened for a season, but his lamp will only burn the brighter for
+what he has undergone.'
+
+Sunday came, fine and glorious as the last.  Again my friends and myself
+breakfasted together--again the good family of the house on the hill
+above, headed by the respectable master, descended to the meadow.  Peter
+and his wife were ready to receive them.  Again Peter placed himself at
+the side of the honest farmer, and Winifred by the side of her friend.
+'Wilt thou not come?' said Peter, looking towards me with a face in which
+there was much emotion.  'Wilt thou not come?' said Winifred, with a face
+beaming with kindness.  But I made no answer, and presently the party
+moved away, in the same manner in which it had moved on the preceding
+Sabbath, and I was again left alone.
+
+The hours of the Sabbath passed slowly away.  I sat gazing at the sky,
+the trees, and the water.  At last I strolled up to the house and sat
+down in the porch.  It was empty; there was no modest maiden there, as on
+the preceding Sabbath.  The damsel of the book had accompanied the rest.
+I had seen her in the procession, and the house appeared quite deserted.
+The owners had probably left it to my custody, so I sat down in the
+porch, quite alone.  The hours of the Sabbath passed heavily away.
+
+At last evening came, and with it the party of the morning.  I was now at
+my place beneath the oak.  I went forward to meet them.  Peter and his
+wife received me with a calm and quiet greeting, and passed forward.  The
+rest of the party had broken into groups.  There was a kind of excitement
+amongst them, and much eager whispering.  I went to one of the groups;
+the young girl of whom I have spoken more than once was speaking: 'Such a
+sermon,' said she, 'it has never been our lot to hear; Peter never before
+spoke as he has done this day--he was always a powerful preacher, but oh,
+the unction of the discourse of this morning, and yet more of that of the
+afternoon, which was the continuation of it!'  'What was the subject?'
+said I, interrupting her.  'Ah! you should have been there, young man, to
+have heard it; it would have made a lasting impression upon you.  I was
+bathed in tears all the time; those who heard it will never forget the
+preaching of the good Peter Williams on the Power, Providence, and
+Goodness of God.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXIX
+
+
+Deep interest--Goodly country--Two mansions--Welshman's Candle--Beautiful
+universe--Godly discourse--Fine church--Points of doctrine--Strange
+adventures--Paltry cause--Roman pontiff--Evil spirit.
+
+On the morrow I said to my friends, 'I am about to depart; farewell!'
+'Depart!' said Peter and his wife, simultaneously; 'whither wouldst thou
+go?'  'I can't stay here all my days,' I replied.  'Of course not,' said
+Peter; 'but we had no idea of losing thee so soon: we had almost hoped
+that thou wouldst join us, become one of us.  We are under infinite
+obligations to thee.'  'You mean I am under infinite obligations to you,'
+said I.  'Did you not save my life?'  'Perhaps so, under God,' said
+Peter; 'and what hast thou not done for me?  Art thou aware that, under
+God, thou hast preserved my soul from despair?  But, independent of that,
+we like thy company, and feel a deep interest in thee, and would fain
+teach thee the way that is right.  Hearken, to-morrow we go into Wales;
+go with us.'  'I have no wish to go into Wales,' said I.  'Why not?' said
+Peter, with animation.  'Wales is a goodly country; as the Scripture
+says--a land of brooks of water, of fountains and depths, that spring out
+of valleys and hills, a land whose stones are iron, and out of whose
+hills thou mayest dig lead.'
+
+'I daresay it is a very fine country,' said I, 'but I have no wish to go
+there just now; my destiny seems to point in another direction, to say
+nothing of my trade.'  'Thou dost right to say nothing of thy trade,'
+said Peter, smiling, 'for thou seemest to care nothing about it; which
+has led Winifred and myself to suspect that thou art not altogether what
+thou seemest; but, setting that aside, we should be most happy if thou
+wouldst go with us into Wales.'  'I cannot promise to go with you into
+Wales,' said I; 'but, as you depart to-morrow, I will stay with you
+through the day, and on the morrow accompany you part of the way.'  'Do,'
+said Peter: 'I have many people to see to-day, and so has Winifred; but
+we will both endeavour to have some serious discourse with thee, which,
+perhaps, will turn to thy profit in the end.'
+
+In the course of the day the good Peter came to me, as I was seated
+beneath the oak, and, placing himself by me, commenced addressing me in
+the following manner:--
+
+'I have no doubt, my young friend, that you are willing to admit that the
+most important thing which a human being possesses is his soul; it is of
+infinitely more importance than the body, which is a frail substance, and
+cannot last for many years; but not so the soul, which, by its nature, is
+imperishable.  To one of two mansions the soul is destined to depart,
+after its separation from the body, to heaven or hell; to the halls of
+eternal bliss, where God and His holy angels dwell, or to the place of
+endless misery, inhabited by Satan and his grisly companions.  My friend,
+if the joys of heaven are great, unutterably great, so are the torments
+of hell unutterably so.  I wish not to speak of them, I wish not to
+terrify your imagination with the torments of hell: indeed, I like not to
+think of them; but it is necessary to speak of them sometimes, and to
+think of them sometimes, lest you should sink into a state of carnal
+security.  Authors, friend, and learned men, are not altogether agreed as
+to the particulars of hell.  They all agree, however, in considering it a
+place of exceeding horror.  Master Ellis Wyn, who by the bye was a
+churchman, calls it, amongst other things, a place of strong sighs, and
+of flaming sparks.  Master Rees Pritchard, who was not only a churchman,
+but Vicar of Llandovery, and flourished about two hundred years ago--I
+wish many like him flourished now--speaking of hell, in his collection of
+sweet hymns called the "Welshman's Candle," observes,
+
+'"The pool is continually blazing; it is very deep, without any known
+bottom, and the walls are so high, that there is neither hope nor
+possibility of escaping over them."
+
+'But, as I told you just now, I have no great pleasure in talking of
+hell.  No, friend, no; I would sooner talk of the other place, and of the
+goodness and hospitality of God amongst His saints above.'
+
+And then the excellent man began to dilate upon the joys of heaven, and
+the goodness and hospitality of God in the mansions above; explaining to
+me, in the clearest way, how I might get there.
+
+And when he had finished what he had to say, he left me, whereupon
+Winifred drew nigh, and sitting down by me began to address me.  'I do
+not think,' said she, 'from what I have observed of thee, that thou
+wouldst wish to be ungrateful, and yet, is not thy whole life a series of
+ingratitude, and to whom?--to thy Maker.  Has He not endowed thee with a
+goodly and healthy form; and senses which enable thee to enjoy the
+delights of His beautiful universe--the work of His hands?  Canst thou
+not enjoy, even to rapture, the brightness of the sun, the perfume of the
+meads, and the song of the dear birds which inhabit among the trees?  Yes,
+thou canst; for I have seen thee, and observed thee doing so.  Yet,
+during the whole time that I have known thee, I have not heard proceed
+from thy lips one single word of praise or thanksgiving to . . .'
+
+And in this manner the admirable woman proceeded for a considerable time,
+and to all her discourse I listened with attention; and when she had
+concluded, I took her hand and said, 'I thank you,' and that was all.
+
+On the next day everything was ready for our departure.  The good family
+of the house came to bid us farewell.  There were shaking of hands, and
+kisses, as on the night of our arrival.
+
+And as I stood somewhat apart, the young girl of whom I have spoken so
+often came up to me, and holding out her hand, said, 'Farewell, young
+man, wherever thou goest.'  Then, after looking around her, she said, 'It
+was all true you told me.  Yesterday I received a letter from him thou
+wottest of; he is coming soon.  God bless you, young man; who would have
+thought thou knewest so much!'
+
+So, after we had taken our farewell of the good family, we departed,
+proceeding in the direction of Wales.  Peter was very cheerful, and
+enlivened the way with godly discourse and spiritual hymns, some of which
+were in the Welsh language.  At length I said, 'It is a pity that you did
+not continue in the Church; you have a turn for Psalmody, and I have
+heard of a man becoming a bishop by means of a less qualification.'
+
+'Very probably,' said Peter; 'more the pity.  But I have told you the
+reason of my forsaking it.  Frequently, when I went to the church door, I
+found it barred, and the priest absent; what was I to do?  My heart was
+bursting for want of some religious help and comfort; what could I do? as
+good Master Rees Pritchard observes in his "Candle for Welshmen":--
+
+'"It is a doleful thing to see little children burning on the hot coals
+for want of help; but yet more doleful to see a flock of souls falling
+into the burning lake for want of a priest."'
+
+'The Church of England is a fine church,' said I; 'I would not advise any
+one to speak ill of the Church of England before me.'
+
+'I have nothing to say against the church,' said Peter; 'all I wish is
+that it would fling itself a little more open, and that its priests would
+a little more bestir themselves; in a word, that it would shoulder the
+cross and become a missionary church.'
+
+'It is too proud for that,' said Winifred.
+
+'You are much more of a Methodist,' said I, 'than your husband.  But tell
+me,' said I, addressing myself to Peter, 'do you not differ from the
+church in some points of doctrine?  I, of course, as a true member of the
+church, am quite ignorant of the peculiar opinions of wandering
+sectaries.'
+
+'Oh the pride of that church!' said Winifred, half to herself; 'wandering
+sectaries!'
+
+'We differ in no points of doctrine,' said Peter; 'we believe all the
+church believes, though we are not so fond of vain and superfluous
+ceremonies, snow-white neckcloths and surplices, as the church is.  We
+likewise think that there is no harm in a sermon by the road-side, or in
+holding free discourse with a beggar beneath a hedge, or a tinker,' he
+added, smiling; 'it was those superfluous ceremonies, those surplices and
+white neckcloths, and, above all, the necessity of strictly regulating
+his words and conversation, which drove John Wesley out of the church,
+and sent him wandering up and down as you see me, poor Welsh Peter, do.'
+
+Nothing farther passed for some time; we were now drawing near the hills:
+at last I said, 'You must have met with a great many strange adventures
+since you took up this course of life?'
+
+'Many,' said Peter, 'it has been my lot to meet with; but none more
+strange than one which occurred to me only a few weeks ago.  You were
+asking me, not long since, whether I believed in devils?  Ay, truly,
+young man; and I believe that the abyss and the yet deeper unknown do not
+contain them all; some walk about upon the green earth.  So it happened,
+some weeks ago, that I was exercising my ministry about forty miles from
+here.  I was alone, Winifred being slightly indisposed, staying for a few
+days at the house of an acquaintance; I had finished afternoon's
+worship--the people had dispersed, and I was sitting solitary by my cart
+under some green trees in a quiet retired place; suddenly a voice said to
+me, "Good-evening, Pastor"; I looked up, and before me stood a man, at
+least the appearance of a man, dressed in a black suit of rather a
+singular fashion.  He was about my own age, or somewhat older.  As I
+looked upon him, it appeared to me that I had seen him twice before
+whilst preaching.  I replied to his salutation, and perceiving that he
+looked somewhat fatigued, I took out a stool from the cart, and asked him
+to sit down.  We began to discourse; I at first supposed that he might be
+one of ourselves, some wandering minister; but I was soon undeceived.
+Neither his language nor his ideas were those of any one of our body.  He
+spoke on all kinds of matters with much fluency; till at last he
+mentioned my preaching, complimenting me on my powers.  I replied, as
+well I might, that I could claim no merit of my own, and that if I spoke
+with any effect, it was only by the grace of God.  As I uttered these
+last words, a horrible kind of sneer came over his countenance, which
+made me shudder, for there was something diabolical in it.  I said little
+more, but listened attentively to his discourse.  At last he said that I
+was engaged in a paltry cause, quite unworthy of one of my powers.  "How
+can that be," said I, "even if I possessed all the powers in the world,
+seeing that I am engaged in the cause of our Lord Jesus?"
+
+'The same kind of sneer again came on his countenance, but he almost
+instantly observed, that if I chose to forsake this same miserable cause,
+from which nothing but contempt and privation was to be expected, he
+would enlist me into another, from which I might expect both profit and
+renown.  An idea now came into my head, and I told him firmly that if he
+wished me to forsake my present profession and become a member of the
+Church of England, I must absolutely decline; that I had no ill-will
+against that church, but I thought I could do most good in my present
+position, which I would not forsake to be Archbishop of Canterbury.
+Thereupon he burst into a strange laughter, and went away, repeating to
+himself, "Church of England!  Archbishop of Canterbury!"  A few days
+after, when I was once more in a solitary place, he again appeared before
+me, and asked me whether I had thought over his words, and whether I was
+willing to enlist under the banners of his master, adding that he was
+eager to secure me, as he conceived that I might be highly useful to the
+cause.  I then asked him who his master was; he hesitated for a moment,
+and then answered, "The Roman Pontiff."  "If it be he," said I, "I can
+have nothing to do with him; I will serve no one who is an enemy of
+Christ."  Thereupon he drew near to me, and told me not to talk so much
+like a simpleton; that as for Christ, it was probable that no such person
+ever existed, but that if He ever did, He was the greatest impostor the
+world ever saw.  How long he continued in this way I know not, for I now
+considered that an evil spirit was before me, and shrank within myself,
+shivering in every limb; when I recovered myself and looked about me, he
+was gone.  Two days after, he again stood before me, in the same place,
+and about the same hour, renewing his propositions, and speaking more
+horribly than before.  I made him no answer; whereupon he continued; but
+suddenly hearing a noise behind him, he looked round and beheld Winifred,
+who had returned to me on the morning of that day.  "Who are you?" said
+he, fiercely.  "This man's wife," said she, calmly fixing her eyes upon
+him.  "Begone from him, unhappy one, thou temptest him in vain."  He made
+no answer, but stood as if transfixed: at length, recovering himself, he
+departed, muttering "Wife! wife!  If the fool has a wife, he will never
+do for us."'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXX
+
+
+The border--Thank you both--Pipe and fiddle--Taliesin.
+
+We were now drawing very near the hills, and Peter said, 'If you are to
+go into Wales, you must presently decide, for we are close upon the
+border.'
+
+'Which is the border?' said I.
+
+'Yon small brook,' said Peter, 'into which the man on horseback who is
+coming towards us is now entering.'
+
+'I see it,' said I, 'and the man; he stops in the middle of it, as if to
+water his steed.'
+
+We proceeded till we had nearly reached the brook.  'Well,' said Peter,
+'will you go into Wales?'
+
+'What should I do in Wales?' I demanded.
+
+'Do!' said Peter, smiling, 'learn Welsh.'
+
+I stopped my little pony.  'Then I need not go into Wales; I already know
+Welsh.'
+
+'Know Welsh!' said Peter, staring at me.
+
+'Know Welsh!' said Winifred, stopping her cart.
+
+'How and when did you learn it?' said Peter.
+
+'From books, in my boyhood.'
+
+'Read Welsh!' said Peter; 'is it possible?'
+
+'Read Welsh!' said Winifred; 'is it possible?'
+
+'Well, I hope you will come with us,' said Peter.
+
+'Come with us, young man,' said Winifred; 'let me, on the other side of
+the brook, welcome you into Wales.'
+
+'Thank you both,' said I, 'but I will not come.'
+
+'Wherefore?' exclaimed both, simultaneously.
+
+'Because it is neither fit nor proper that I cross into Wales at this
+time, and in this manner.  When I go into Wales, I should wish to go in a
+new suit of superfine black, with hat and beaver, mounted on a powerful
+steed, black and glossy, like that which bore Greduv to the fight of
+Catraeth.  I should wish, moreover, to see the Welshmen assembled on the
+border ready to welcome me with pipe and fiddle, and much whooping and
+shouting, and to attend me to Wrexham, or even as far as Machynllaith,
+where I should wish to be invited to a dinner at which all the bards
+should be present, and to be seated at the right hand of the president,
+who, when the cloth was removed, should arise, and, amidst cries of
+silence, exclaim--"Brethren and Welshmen, allow me to propose the health
+of my most respectable friend the translator of the odes of the great Ab
+Gwilym, the pride and glory of Wales."'
+
+'How!' said Peter, 'hast thou translated the works of the mighty Dafydd?'
+
+'With notes critical, historical, and explanatory.'
+
+'Come with us, friend,' said Peter.  'I cannot promise such a dinner as
+thou wishest, but neither pipe nor fiddle shall be wanting.'
+
+'Come with us, young man,' said Winifred, 'even as thou art, and the
+daughters of Wales shall bid thee welcome.'
+
+'I will not go with you,' said I.  'Dost thou see that man in the ford?'
+
+'Who is staring at us so, and whose horse has not yet done drinking?  Of
+course I see him.'
+
+'I shall turn back with him.  God bless you.'
+
+'Go back with him not,' said Peter; 'he is one of those whom I like not,
+one of the clibberty-clabber, as Master Ellis Wyn observes--turn not with
+that man.'
+
+'Go not back with him,' said Winifred.  'If thou goest with that man,
+thou wilt soon forget all our profitable counsels; come with us.'
+
+'I cannot; I have much to say to him.  Kosko Divvus, Mr. Petulengro.'
+
+'Kosko Divvus, Pal,' said Mr. Petulengro, riding through the water; 'are
+you turning back?'
+
+I turned back with Mr. Petulengro.
+
+Peter came running after me: 'One moment, young man,--who and what are
+you?'
+
+'I must answer in the words of Taliesin,' said I: 'none can say with
+positiveness whether I be fish or flesh, least of all myself.  God bless
+you both!'
+
+'Take this,' said Peter, and he thrust his Welsh Bible into my hand.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXI
+
+
+At a funeral--Two days ago--Very coolly--Roman woman--Well and
+hearty--Somewhat dreary--Plum pudding--Roman fashion--Quite different--The
+dark lane--Beyond the time--Fine fellow--Such a struggle--Like a wild
+cat--Fair Play--Pleasant enough spot--No gloves.
+
+So I turned back with Mr. Petulengro.  We travelled for some time in
+silence; at last we fell into discourse.  'You have been in Wales, Mr.
+Petulengro?'
+
+'Ay, truly, brother.'
+
+'What have you been doing there?'
+
+'Assisting at a funeral.'
+
+'At whose funeral?'
+
+'Mrs. Herne's, brother.'
+
+'Is she dead, then?'
+
+'As a nail, brother.'
+
+'How did she die?'
+
+'By hanging, brother.'
+
+'I am lost in astonishment,' said I; whereupon Mr. Petulengro, lifting
+his sinister leg over the neck of his steed, and adjusting himself
+sideways in the saddle, replied, with great deliberation, 'Two days ago I
+happened to be at a fair not very far from here; I was all alone by
+myself, for our party were upwards of forty miles off, when who should
+come up but a chap that I knew, a relation, or rather a connection, of
+mine--one of those Hernes.  "Aren't you going to the funeral?" said he;
+and then, brother, there passed between him and me, in the way of
+questioning and answering, much the same as has just now passed between
+me and you; but when he mentioned hanging, I thought I could do no less
+than ask who hanged her, which you forgot to do.  "Who hanged her?" said
+I; and then the man told me that she had done it herself; been her own
+hinjiri; and then I thought to myself what a sin and shame it would be if
+I did not go to the funeral, seeing that she was my own mother-in-law.  I
+would have brought my wife, and, indeed, the whole of our party, but
+there was no time for that; they were too far off, and the dead was to be
+buried early the next morning; so I went with the man, and he led me into
+Wales, where his party had lately retired, and when there, through many
+wild and desolate places to their encampment, and there I found the
+Hernes, and the dead body--the last laid out on a mattress, in a tent,
+dressed Romaneskoenaes in a red cloak, and big bonnet of black beaver.  I
+must say for the Hernes that they took the matter very coolly; some were
+eating, others drinking, and some were talking about their small affairs;
+there was one, however, who did not take the matter so coolly, but took
+on enough for the whole family, sitting beside the dead woman, tearing
+her hair, and refusing to take either meat or drink; it was the child
+Leonora.  I arrived at night-fall, and the burying was not to take place
+till the morning, which I was rather sorry for, as I am not very fond of
+them Hernes, who are not very fond of anybody.  They never asked me to
+eat or drink, notwithstanding I had married into the family; one of them,
+however, came up and offered to fight me for five shillings; had it not
+been for them I should have come back as empty as I went--he didn't stand
+up five minutes.  Brother, I passed the night as well as I could, beneath
+a tree, for the tents were full, and not over clean; I slept little, and
+had my eyes about me, for I knew the kind of people I was among.
+
+'Early in the morning the funeral took place.  The body was placed not in
+a coffin but on a bier, and carried not to a churchyard but to a deep
+dell close by; and there it was buried beneath a rock, dressed just as I
+have told you; and this was done by the bidding of Leonora, who had heard
+her bebee say that she wished to be buried, not in gorgious fashion, but
+like a Roman woman of the old blood, the kosko puro rati, brother.  When
+it was over, and we had got back to the encampment, I prepared to be
+going.  Before mounting my gry, however, I bethought me to ask what could
+have induced the dead woman to make away with herself--a thing so
+uncommon amongst Romanies; whereupon one squinted with his eyes, a second
+spirted saliver into the air, and a third said that he neither knew nor
+cared; she was a good riddance, having more than once been nearly the
+ruin of them all, from the quantity of brimstone she carried about her.
+One, however, I suppose rather ashamed of the way in which they had
+treated me, said at last that if I wanted to know all about the matter
+none could tell me better than the child, who was in all her secrets, and
+was not a little like her; so I looked about for the child, but could
+find her nowhere.  At last the same man told me that he shouldn't wonder
+if I found her at the grave; so I went back to the grave, and sure enough
+there I found the child Leonora, seated on the ground above the body,
+crying and taking on; so I spoke kindly to her, and said, "How came all
+this, Leonora? tell me all about it."  It was a long time before I could
+get any answer; at last she opened her mouth and spoke, and these were
+the words she said, "It was all along of your Pal"; and then she told me
+all about the matter--how Mrs. Herne could not abide you, which I knew
+before; and that she had sworn your destruction, which I did not know
+before.  And then she told me how she found you living in the wood by
+yourself, and how you were enticed to eat a poisoned cake; and she told
+me many other things that you wot of, and she told me what perhaps you
+don't wot, namely, that finding you had been removed, she, the child, had
+tracked you a long way, and found you at last well and hearty, and no
+ways affected by the poison, and heard you, as she stood concealed,
+disputing about religion with a Welsh Methody.  Well, brother, she told
+me all this; and, moreover, that when Mrs. Herne heard of it, she said
+that a dream of hers had come to pass.  I don't know what it was, but
+something about herself, a tinker, and a dean; and then she added that it
+was all up with her, and that she must take a long journey.  Well,
+brother, that same night Leonora, waking from her sleep in the tent where
+Mrs. Herne and she were wont to sleep, missed her bebee, and, becoming
+alarmed, went in search of her, and at last found her hanging from a
+branch; and when the child had got so far, she took on violently, and I
+could not get another word from her; so I left her, and here I am.'
+
+{picture:'Sure enough there I found the child Leonora, seated on the
+ground above the body, crying and taking on.': page454.jpg}
+
+'And I am glad to see you, Mr. Petulengro; but this is sad news which you
+tell me about Mrs. Herne.'
+
+{picture:'Leonora, waking from her sleep, missed her bebee, and, becoming
+alarmed, went in search of her, and at last found her hanging from a
+branch.': page456.jpg}
+
+'Somewhat dreary, brother; yet, perhaps, after all, it is a good thing
+that she is removed; she carried so much Devil's tinder about with her,
+as the man said.'
+
+'I am sorry for her,' said I; 'more especially as I am the cause of her
+death--though the innocent one.'
+
+'She could not bide you, brother, that's certain; but that is no
+reason'--said Mr. Petulengro, balancing himself upon the saddle--'that is
+no reason why she should prepare drow to take away your essence of life;
+and, when disappointed, to hang herself upon a tree: if she was
+dissatisfied with you, she might have flown at you, and scratched your
+face; or, if she did not judge herself your match, she might have put
+down five shillings for a turn-up between you and some one she thought
+could beat you--myself, for example--and so the matter might have ended
+comfortably; but she was always too fond of covert ways, drows, and
+brimstones.  This is not the first poisoning affair she has been engaged
+in.'
+
+'You allude to drabbing bawlor.'
+
+'Bah!' said Mr. Petulengro; 'there's no harm in that.  No, no! she has
+cast drows in her time for other guess things than bawlor; both Gorgios
+and Romans have tasted of them, and died.  Did you never hear of the
+poisoned plum pudding?'
+
+'Never.'
+
+'Then I will tell you about it.  It happened about six years ago, a few
+months after she had quitted us--she had gone first amongst her own
+people, as she called them; but there was another small party of Romans,
+with whom she soon became very intimate.  It so happened that this small
+party got into trouble; whether it was about a horse or an ass, or
+passing bad money, no matter to you and me, who had no hand in the
+business; three or four of them were taken and lodged in--Castle, and
+amongst them was a woman; but the sherengro, or principal man of the
+party, and who it seems had most hand in the affair, was still at large.
+All of a sudden a rumour was spread abroad that the woman was about to
+play false, and to 'peach the rest.  Said the principal man, when he
+heard it, "If she does, I am nashkado."  Mrs. Herne was then on a visit
+to the party, and when she heard the principal man take on so, she said,
+"But I suppose you know what to do?"  "I do not," said he.  "Then hir mi
+devlis," said she, "you are a fool.  But leave the matter to me, I know
+how to dispose of her in Roman fashion."  Why she wanted to interfere in
+the matter, brother, I don't know, unless it was from pure brimstoneness
+of disposition--she had no hand in the matter which had brought the party
+into trouble--she was only on a visit, and it had happened before she
+came; but she was always ready to give dangerous advice.  Well, brother,
+the principal man listened to what she had to say, and let her do what
+she would; and she made a pudding, a very nice one, no doubt--for,
+besides plums, she put in drows and all the Roman condiments that she
+knew of; and she gave it to the principal man, and the principal put it
+into a basket and directed it to the woman in--Castle, and the woman in
+the castle took it and--'
+
+'Ate of it,' said I; 'just like my case!'
+
+'Quite different, brother; she took it, it is true, but instead of giving
+way to her appetite, as you might have done, she put it before the rest
+whom she was going to impeach; perhaps she wished to see how they liked
+it before she tasted it herself; and all the rest were poisoned, and one
+died, and there was a precious outcry, and the woman cried loudest of
+all; and she said, "It was my death was sought for; I know the man, and
+I'll be revenged."  And then the Poknees spoke to her and said, "Where
+can we find him?" and she said, "I am awake to his motions; three weeks
+from hence, the night before the full moon, at such and such an hour, he
+will pass down such a lane with such a man."'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'and what did the Poknees do?'
+
+'Do, brother! sent for a plastramengro from Bow Street, quite secretly,
+and told him what the woman had said; and the night before the full moon,
+the plastramengro went to the place which the juwa had pointed out, all
+alone, brother; and in order that he might not be too late, he went two
+hours before his time.  I know the place well, brother, where the
+plastramengro placed himself behind a thick holly tree, at the end of a
+lane, where a gate leads into various fields, through which there is a
+path for carts and horses.  The lane is called the dark lane by the
+Gorgios, being much shaded by trees.  So the plastramengro placed himself
+in the dark lane behind the holly tree; it was a cold February night,
+dreary though; the wind blew in gusts, and the moon had not yet risen,
+and the plastramengro waited behind the tree till he was tired, and
+thought he might as well sit down; so he sat down, and was not long in
+falling to sleep, and there he slept for some hours; and when he awoke
+the moon had risen, and was shining bright, so that there was a kind of
+moonlight even in the dark lane; and the plastramengro pulled out his
+watch, and contrived to make out that it was just two hours beyond the
+time when the men should have passed by.  Brother, I do not know what the
+plastramengro thought of himself, but I know, brother, what I should have
+thought of myself in his situation.  I should have thought, brother, that
+I was a drowsy scoppelo, and that I had let the fellow pass by whilst I
+was sleeping behind a bush.  As it turned out, however, his going to
+sleep did no harm, but quite the contrary: just as he was going away, he
+heard a gate slam in the direction of the fields, and then he heard the
+low stumping of horses, as if on soft ground, for the path in those
+fields is generally soft, and at that time it had been lately ploughed
+up.  Well, brother, presently he saw two men on horseback coming towards
+the lane through the field behind the gate; the man who rode foremost was
+a tall big fellow, the very man he was in quest of; the other was a
+smaller chap, not so small either, but a light, wiry fellow, and a proper
+master of his hands when he sees occasion for using them.  Well, brother,
+the foremost man came to the gate, reached at the hank, undid it, and
+rode through, holding it open for the other.  Before, however, the other
+could follow into the lane, out bolted the plastramengro from behind the
+tree, kicked the gate to with his foot, and, seizing the big man on horse-
+back, "You are my prisoner," said he.  I am of opinion, brother, that the
+plastramengro, notwithstanding he went to sleep, must have been a regular
+fine fellow.'
+
+'I am entirely of your opinion,' said I; 'but what happened then?'
+
+'Why, brother, the Rommany chal, after he had somewhat recovered from his
+surprise, for it is rather uncomfortable to be laid hold of at
+night-time, and told you are a prisoner; more especially when you happen
+to have two or three things on your mind which, if proved against you,
+would carry you to the nashky,--the Rommany chal, I say, clubbed his
+whip, and aimed a blow at the plastramengro, which, if it had hit him on
+the skull, as was intended, would very likely have cracked it.  The
+plastramengro, however, received it partly on his staff, so that it did
+him no particular damage.  Whereupon, seeing what kind of customer he had
+to deal with, he dropped his staff and seized the chal with both his
+hands, who forthwith spurred his horse, hoping, by doing so, either to
+break away from him or fling him down; but it would not do--the
+plastramengro held on like a bull-dog, so that the Rommany chal, to
+escape being hauled to the ground, suddenly flung himself off the saddle,
+and then happened in that lane, close by the gate, such a struggle
+between those two--the chal and the runner--as I suppose will never
+happen again.  But you must have heard of it; every one has heard of it;
+every one has heard of the fight between the Bow Street engro and the
+Rommany chal.'
+
+'I never heard of it till now.'
+
+'All England rung of it, brother.  There never was a better match than
+between those two.  The runner was somewhat the stronger of the two--all
+those engroes are strong fellows--and a great deal cooler, for all of
+that sort are wondrous cool people--he had, however, to do with one who
+knew full well how to take his own part.  The chal fought the engro,
+brother, in the old Roman fashion.  He bit, he kicked, and screamed like
+a wild cat of Benygant; casting foam from his mouth and fire from his
+eyes.  Sometimes he was beneath the engro's legs, and sometimes he was
+upon his shoulders.  What the engro found the most difficult was to get a
+firm hold of the chal, for no sooner did he seize the chal by any part of
+his wearing apparel, than the chal either tore himself away, or contrived
+to slip out of it; so that in a little time the chal was three parts
+naked; and as for holding him by the body, it was out of the question,
+for he was as slippery as an eel.  At last the engro seized the chal by
+the Belcher's handkerchief, which he wore in a knot round his neck, and
+do whatever the chal could, he could not free himself; and when the engro
+saw that, it gave him fresh heart, no doubt: "It's of no use," said he;
+"you had better give in; hold out your hands for the darbies, or I will
+throttle you."
+
+'And what did the other fellow do, who came with the chal?' said I.
+
+'I sat still on my horse, brother.'
+
+'You!' said I.  'Were you the man?'
+
+'I was he, brother.'
+
+'And why did you not help your comrade?'
+
+'I have fought in the ring, brother.'
+
+'And what had fighting in the ring to do with fighting in the lane?'
+
+'You mean not fighting.  A great deal, brother; it taught me to prize
+fair play.  When I fought Staffordshire Dick, t'other side of London, I
+was alone, brother.  Not a Rommany chal to back me, and he had all his
+brother pals about him; but they gave me fair play, brother; and I beat
+Staffordshire Dick, which I couldn't have done had they put one finger on
+his side the scale; for he was as good a man as myself, or nearly so.
+Now, brother, had I but bent a finger in favour of the Rommany chal, the
+plastramengro would never have come alive out of the lane; but I did not,
+for I thought to myself fair play is a precious stone; so you see,
+brother--'
+
+'That you are quite right, Mr. Petulengro, I see that clearly; and now,
+pray proceed with your narration; it is both moral and entertaining.'
+
+But Mr. Petulengro did not proceed with his narration, neither did he
+proceed upon his way; he had stopped his horse, and his eyes were
+intently fixed on a broad strip of grass beneath some lofty trees, on the
+left side of the road.  It was a pleasant enough spot, and seemed to
+invite wayfaring people, such as we were, to rest from the fatigues of
+the road, and the heat and vehemence of the sun.  After examining it for
+a considerable time, Mr. Petulengro said, 'I say, brother, that would be
+a nice place for a tussle!'
+
+'I daresay it would,' said I, 'if two people were inclined to fight.'
+
+'The ground is smooth,' said Mr. Petulengro; 'without holes or ruts, and
+the trees cast much shade.  I don't think, brother, that we could find a
+better place,' said Mr. Petulengro, springing from his horse.
+
+'But you and I don't want to fight!'
+
+'Speak for yourself, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro.  'However, I will
+tell you how the matter stands.  There is a point at present between us.
+There can be no doubt that you are the cause of Mrs. Herne's death,
+innocently, you will say, but still the cause.  Now, I shouldn't like it
+to be known that I went up and down the country with a pal who was the
+cause of my mother-in-law's death, that's to say, unless he gave me
+satisfaction.  Now, if I and my pal have a tussle, he gives me
+satisfaction; and, if he knocks my eyes out, which I know you can't do,
+it makes no difference at all, he gives me satisfaction; and he who says
+to the contrary knows nothing of gypsy law, and is a dinelo into the
+bargain.'
+
+'But we have no gloves!'
+
+'Gloves!' said Mr. Petulengro, contemptuously, 'gloves!  I tell you what,
+brother, I always thought you were a better hand at the gloves than the
+naked fist; and, to tell you the truth, besides taking satisfaction for
+Mrs. Herne's death, I wish to see what you can do with your mawleys; so
+now is your time, brother, and this is your place, grass and shade, no
+ruts or holes; come on, brother, or I shall think you what I should not
+like to call you.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXII
+
+
+Offence and defence--I'm satisfied--Fond of solitude--Possession of
+property--Chal Devlehi--Winding path.
+
+And when I heard Mr. Petulengro talk in this manner, which I had never
+heard him do before, and which I can only account for by his being
+fasting and ill-tempered, I had of course no other alternative than to
+accept his challenge; so I put myself into a posture which I deemed the
+best both for offence and defence, and the tussle commenced; and when it
+had endured for about half an hour, Mr. Petulengro said, 'Brother, there
+is much blood on your face; you had better wipe it off'; and when I had
+wiped it off, and again resumed my former attitude, Mr. Petulengro said,
+'I think enough has been done, brother, in the affair of the old woman; I
+have, moreover, tried what you are able to do, and find you, as I
+thought, less apt with the naked mawleys than the stuffed gloves; nay,
+brother, put your hands down, I'm satisfied; blood has been shed, which
+is all that can be reasonably expected for an old woman who carried so
+much brimstone about her as Mrs. Herne.'
+
+So the struggle ended, and we resumed our route, Mr. Petulengro sitting
+sideways upon his horse as before, and I driving my little pony-cart; and
+when we had proceeded about three miles, we came to a small public-house,
+which bore the sign of the Silent Woman, where we stopped to refresh our
+cattle and ourselves; and as we sat over our bread and ale, it came to
+pass that Mr. Petulengro asked me various questions, and amongst others,
+how I intended to dispose of myself; I told him that I did not know;
+whereupon, with considerable frankness, he invited me to his camp, and
+told me that if I chose to settle down amongst them, and become a Rommany
+chal, I should have his wife's sister Ursula, who was still unmarried,
+and occasionally talked of me.
+
+{picture:We came to a small public-house, which bore the sign of the
+Silent Woman, where we stopped to refresh our cattle and ourselves:
+page463.jpg}
+
+I declined his offer, assigning as a reason the recent death of Mrs.
+Herne, of which I was the cause, although innocent.  'A pretty life I
+should lead with those two,' said I, 'when they came to know it.'  'Pooh,'
+said Mr. Petulengro, 'they will never know it.  I shan't blab, and as for
+Leonora, that girl has a head on her shoulders.'  'Unlike the woman in
+the sign,' said I, 'whose head is cut off.  You speak nonsense, Mr.
+Petulengro; as long as a woman has a head on her shoulders she'll
+talk,--but, leaving women out of the case, it is impossible to keep
+anything a secret; an old master of mine told me so long ago.  I have
+moreover another reason for declining your offer.  I am at present not
+disposed for society.  I am become fond of solitude.  I wish I could find
+some quiet place to which I could retire to hold communion with my own
+thoughts, and practise, if I thought fit, either of my trades.'  'What
+trades?' said Mr. Petulengro.  'Why, the one which I have lately been
+engaged in, or my original one, which I confess I should like better,
+that of a kaulo-mescro.'  'Ah, I have frequently heard you talk of making
+horse-shoes,' said Mr. Petulengro; 'I, however, never saw you make one,
+and no one else that I am aware; I don't believe--come, brother, don't be
+angry, it's quite possible that you may have done things which neither I
+nor any one else has seen you do, and that such things may some day or
+other come to light, as you say nothing can be kept secret.  Be that,
+however, as it may, pay the reckoning and let us be going; I think I can
+advise you to just such a kind of place as you seem to want.'
+
+'And how do you know that I have got wherewithal to pay the reckoning?' I
+demanded.  'Brother,' said Mr. Petulengro, 'I was just now looking in
+your face, which exhibited the very look of a person conscious of the
+possession of property; there was nothing hungry or sneaking in it.  Pay
+the reckoning, brother.'
+
+And when we were once more upon the road, Mr. Petulengro began to talk of
+the place which he conceived would serve me as a retreat under present
+circumstances.  'I tell you frankly, brother, that it is a queer kind of
+place, and I am not very fond of pitching my tent in it, it is so
+surprisingly dreary.  It is a deep dingle in the midst of a large field,
+on an estate about which there has been a lawsuit for some years past.  I
+daresay you will be quiet enough, for the nearest town is five miles
+distant, and there are only a few huts and hedge public-houses in the
+neighbourhood.  Brother, I am fond of solitude myself, but not that kind
+of solitude; I like a quiet heath, where I can pitch my house, but I
+always like to have a gay stirring place not far off, where the women can
+pen dukkerin, and I myself can sell or buy a horse, if needful--such a
+place as the Chong Gav.  I never feel so merry as when there, brother, or
+on the heath above it, where I taught you Rommany.'
+
+Shortly after this discourse we reached a milestone, and a few yards from
+the milestone, on the left hand, was a crossroad.  Thereupon Mr.
+Petulengro said, 'Brother, my path lies to the left if you choose to go
+with me to my camp, good; if not, Chal Devlehi.'  But I again refused Mr.
+Petulengro's invitation, and, shaking him by the hand, proceeded forward
+alone; and about ten miles farther on I reached the town of which he had
+spoken, and, following certain directions which he had given, discovered,
+though not without some difficulty, the dingle which he had mentioned.  It
+was a deep hollow in the midst of a wide field; the shelving sides were
+overgrown with trees and bushes, a belt of sallows surrounded it on the
+top, a steep winding path led down into the depths, practicable, however,
+for a light cart, like mine; at the bottom was an open space, and there I
+pitched my tent, and there I contrived to put up my forge.  'I will here
+ply the trade of kaulomescro,' said I.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXIII
+
+
+Highly poetical--Volundr--Grecian mythology--Making a petul--Tongues of
+flame--Hammering--Spite of dukkerin--Heaviness.
+
+It has always struck me that there is something highly poetical about a
+forge.  I am not singular in this opinion: various individuals have
+assured me that they can never pass by one, even in the midst of a
+crowded town, without experiencing sensations which they can scarcely
+define, but which are highly pleasurable.  I have a decided penchant for
+forges, especially rural ones, placed in some quaint quiet spot--a
+dingle, for example, which is a poetical place, or at a meeting of four
+roads, which is still more so; for how many a superstition--and
+superstition is the soul of poetry--is connected with these cross roads!
+I love to light upon such a one, especially after nightfall, as
+everything about a forge tells to most advantage at night; the hammer
+sounds more solemnly in the stillness; the glowing particles scattered by
+the strokes sparkle with more effect in the darkness, whilst the sooty
+visage of the sastramescro, half in shadow and half illumed by the red
+and partial blaze of the forge, looks more mysterious and strange.  On
+such occasions I draw in my horse's rein, and, seated in the saddle,
+endeavour to associate with the picture before me--in itself a picture of
+romance--whatever of the wild and wonderful I have read of in books, or
+have seen with my own eyes in connection with forges.
+
+I believe the life of any blacksmith, especially a rural one, would
+afford materials for a highly poetical history.  I do not speak
+unadvisedly, having the honour to be free of the forge, and therefore
+fully competent to give an opinion as to what might be made out of the
+forge by some dexterous hand.  Certainly, the strangest and most
+entertaining life ever written is that of a blacksmith of the olden
+north, a certain Volundr, or Velint, who lived in woods and thickets,
+made keen swords--so keen, indeed, that if placed in a running stream
+they would fairly divide an object, however slight, which was borne
+against them by the water, and who eventually married a king's daughter,
+by whom he had a son, who was as bold a knight as his father was a
+cunning blacksmith.  I never see a forge at night, when seated on the
+back of my horse, at the bottom of a dark lane, but I somehow or other
+associate it with the exploits of this extraordinary fellow, with many
+other extraordinary things, amongst which, as I have hinted before, are
+particular passages of my own life, one or two of which I shall perhaps
+relate to the reader.
+
+I never associate Vulcan and his Cyclops with the idea of a forge.  These
+gentry would be the very last people in the world to flit across my mind
+whilst gazing at the forge from the bottom of the dark lane.  The truth
+is, they are highly unpoetical fellows, as well they may be, connected as
+they are with the Grecian mythology.  At the very mention of their names
+the forge burns dull and dim, as if snowballs had been suddenly flung
+into it; the only remedy is to ply the bellows, an operation which I now
+hasten to perform.
+
+I am in the dingle making a horse-shoe.  Having no other horses on whose
+hoofs I could exercise my art, I made my first essay on those of my own
+horse, if that could be called horse which horse was none, being only a
+pony.  Perhaps, if I had sought all England, I should scarcely have found
+an animal more in need of the kind offices of the smith.  On three of his
+feet there were no shoes at all, and on the fourth only a remnant of one,
+on which account his hoofs were sadly broken and lacerated by his late
+journeys over the hard and flinty roads.  'You belonged to a tinker
+before,' said I, addressing the animal, 'but now you belong to a smith.
+It is said that the household of the shoemaker invariably go worse shod
+than that of any other craft.  That may be the case of those who make
+shoes of leather, but it shan't be said of the household of him who makes
+shoes of iron; at any rate it shan't be said of mine.  I tell you what,
+my gry, whilst you continue with me, you shall both be better shod and
+better fed than you were with your last master.'
+
+I am in the dingle making a petul; and I must here observe that whilst I
+am making a horse-shoe the reader need not be surprised if I speak
+occasionally in the language of the lord of the horse-shoe--Mr.
+Petulengro.  I have for some time past been plying the peshota, or
+bellows, endeavouring to raise up the yag, or fire, in my primitive
+forge.  The angar, or coals, are now burning fiercely, casting forth
+sparks and long vagescoe chipes, or tongues of flame; a small bar of
+sastra, or iron, is lying in the fire, to the length of ten or twelve
+inches, and so far it is hot, very hot, exceeding hot, brother.  And now
+you see me prala, snatch the bar of iron, and place the heated end of it
+upon the covantza, or anvil, and forthwith I commence cooring the sastra
+as hard as if I had been just engaged by a master at the rate of dui
+caulor, or two shillings, a day, brother; and when I have beaten the iron
+till it is nearly cool, and my arm tired, I place it again in the angar,
+and begin again to rouse the fire with the pudamengro, which signifies
+the blowing thing, and is another and more common word for bellows; and
+whilst thus employed I sing a gypsy song, the sound of which is
+wonderfully in unison with the hoarse moaning of the pudamengro, and ere
+the song is finished, the iron is again hot and malleable.  Behold, I
+place it once more on the covantza, and recommence hammering; and now I
+am somewhat at fault; I am in want of assistance; I want you, brother, or
+some one else, to take the bar out of my hand and support it upon the
+covantza, whilst I, applying a chinomescro, or kind of chisel, to the
+heated iron, cut off with a lusty stroke or two of the shukaro baro, or
+big hammer, as much as is required for the petul.  But having no one to
+help me, I go on hammering till I have fairly knocked off as much as I
+want, and then I place the piece in the fire, and again apply the
+bellows, and take up the song where I left it off; and when I have
+finished the song, I take out the iron, but this time with my plaistra,
+or pincers, and then I recommence hammering, turning the iron round and
+round with my pincers: and now I bend the iron and, lo and behold! it has
+assumed something of the outline of a petul.
+
+I am not going to enter into farther details with respect to the
+process--it was rather a wearisome one.  I had to contend with various
+disadvantages; my forge was a rude one, my tools might have been better;
+I was in want of one or two highly necessary implements, but, above all,
+manual dexterity.  Though free of the forge, I had not practised the
+albeytarian art for very many years, never since--but stay, it is not my
+intention to tell the reader, at least in this place, how and when I
+became a blacksmith.  There was one thing, however, which stood me in
+good stead in my labour, the same thing which through life has ever been
+of incalculable utility to me, and has not unfrequently supplied the
+place of friends, money, and many other things of almost equal
+importance--iron perseverance, without which all the advantages of time
+and circumstance are of very little avail in any undertaking.  I was
+determined to make a horse-shoe, and a good one, in spite of every
+obstacle--ay, in spite of dukkerin.  At the end of four days, during
+which I had fashioned and refashioned the thing at least fifty times, I
+had made a petul such as no master of the craft need have been ashamed
+of; with the second shoe I had less difficulty, and, by the time I had
+made the fourth, I would have scorned to take off my hat to the best
+smith in Cheshire.
+
+But I had not yet shod my little gry: this I proceeded now to do.  After
+having first well pared the hoofs with my churi, I applied each petul
+hot, glowing hot, to the pindro.  Oh, how the hoofs hissed! and, oh, the
+pleasant pungent odour which diffused itself through the dingle!--an
+odour good for an ailing spirit.
+
+I shod the little horse bravely--merely pricked him once, slightly, with
+a cafi, for doing which, I remember, he kicked me down; I was not
+disconcerted, however, but, getting up, promised to be more cautious in
+future; and having finished the operation, I filed the hoof well with the
+rin baro, then dismissed him to graze amongst the trees, and, putting my
+smaller tools into the muchtar, I sat down on my stone, and, supporting
+my arm upon my knee, leaned my head upon my hand.  Heaviness had come
+over me.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXIV
+
+
+Several causes--Frogs and eftes--Gloom and twilight--What should I
+do?--'Our Father'--Fellow-men--What a mercy!--Almost calm--Fresh
+store--History of Saul--Pitch dark.
+
+Heaviness had suddenly come over me, heaviness of heart, and of body
+also.  I had accomplished the task which I had imposed upon myself, and
+now that nothing more remained to do, my energies suddenly deserted me,
+and I felt without strength, and without hope.  Several causes, perhaps,
+co-operated to bring about the state in which I then felt myself.  It is
+not improbable that my energies had been overstrained during the work the
+progress of which I have attempted to describe; and every one is aware
+that the results of overstrained energies are feebleness and
+lassitude--want of nourishment might likewise have something to do with
+it.  During my sojourn in the dingle, my food had been of the simplest
+and most unsatisfying description, by no means calculated to support the
+exertion which the labour I had been engaged upon required; it had
+consisted of coarse oaten cakes and hard cheese, and for beverage I had
+been indebted to a neighbouring pit, in which, in the heat of the day, I
+frequently saw, not golden or silver fish, but frogs and eftes swimming
+about.  I am, however, inclined to believe that Mrs. Herne's cake had
+quite as much to do with the matter as insufficient nourishment.  I had
+never entirely recovered from the effects of its poison, but had
+occasionally, especially at night, been visited by a grinding pain in the
+stomach, and my whole body had been suffused with cold sweat; and indeed
+these memorials of the drow have never entirely disappeared--even at the
+present time they display themselves in my system, especially after much
+fatigue of body and excitement of mind.  So there I sat in the dingle
+upon my stone, nerveless and hopeless, by whatever cause or causes that
+state had been produced--there I sat with my head leaning upon my hand,
+and so I continued a long, long time.  At last I lifted my head from my
+hand, and began to cast anxious, unquiet looks about the dingle--the
+entire hollow was now enveloped in deep shade--I cast my eyes up; there
+was a golden gleam on the tops of the trees which grew towards the upper
+parts of the dingle; but lower down all was gloom and twilight--yet, when
+I first sat down on my stone, the sun was right above the dingle,
+illuminating all its depths by the rays which it cast perpendicularly
+down--so I must have sat a long, long time upon my stone.  And now, once
+more, I rested my head upon my hand, but almost instantly lifted it again
+in a kind of fear, and began looking at the objects before me--the forge,
+the tools, the branches of the trees, endeavouring to follow their rows,
+till they were lost in the darkness of the dingle; and now I found my
+right hand grasping convulsively the three fore-fingers of the left,
+first collectively, and then successively, wringing them till the joints
+cracked; then I became quiet, but not for long.
+
+Suddenly I started up, and could scarcely repress the shriek which was
+rising to my lips.  Was it possible?  Yes, all too certain; the evil one
+was upon me; the inscrutable horror which I had felt in my boyhood had
+once more taken possession of me.  I had thought that it had forsaken
+me--that it would never visit me again; that I had outgrown it; that I
+might almost bid defiance to it; and I had even begun to think of it
+without horror, as we are in the habit of doing of horrors of which we
+conceive we run no danger; and lo! when least thought of, it had seized
+me again.  Every moment I felt it gathering force, and making me more
+wholly its own.  What should I do?--resist, of course; and I did resist.
+I grasped, I tore, and strove to fling it from me; but of what avail were
+my efforts?  I could only have got rid of it by getting rid of myself: it
+was a part of myself, or rather it was all myself.  I rushed amongst the
+trees, and struck at them with my bare fists, and dashed my head against
+them, but I felt no pain.  How could I feel pain with that horror upon
+me?  And then I flung myself on the ground, gnawed the earth, and
+swallowed it; and then I looked round; it was almost total darkness in
+the dingle, and the darkness added to my horror.  I could no longer stay
+there; up I rose from the ground, and attempted to escape.  At the bottom
+of the winding path which led up the acclivity I fell over something
+which was lying on the ground; the something moved, and gave a kind of
+whine.  It was my little horse, which had made that place its lair; my
+little horse; my only companion and friend in that now awful solitude.  I
+reached the mouth of the dingle; the sun was just sinking in the far west
+behind me, the fields were flooded with his last gleams.  How beautiful
+everything looked in the last gleams of the sun!  I felt relieved for a
+moment; I was no longer in the horrid dingle.  In another minute the sun
+was gone, and a big cloud occupied the place where he had been: in a
+little time it was almost as dark as it had previously been in the open
+part of the dingle.  My horror increased; what was I to do?--it was of no
+use fighting against the horror--that I saw; the more I fought against
+it, the stronger it became.  What should I do: say my prayers?  Ah! why
+not?  So I knelt down under the hedge, and said, 'Our Father'; but that
+was of no use; and now I could no longer repress cries--the horror was
+too great to be borne.  What should I do? run to the nearest town or
+village, and request the assistance of my fellow-men?  No! that I was
+ashamed to do; notwithstanding the horror was upon me, I was ashamed to
+do that.  I knew they would consider me a maniac, if I went screaming
+amongst them; and I did not wish to be considered a maniac.  Moreover, I
+knew that I was not a maniac, for I possessed all my reasoning powers,
+only the horror was upon me--the screaming horror!  But how were
+indifferent people to distinguish between madness and the screaming
+horror?  So I thought and reasoned; and at last I determined not to go
+amongst my fellow-men, whatever the result might be.  I went to the mouth
+of the dingle, and there, placing myself on my knees, I again said the
+Lord's Prayer; but it was of no use--praying seemed to have no effect
+over the horror; the unutterable fear appeared rather to increase than
+diminish, and I again uttered wild cries, so loud that I was apprehensive
+they would be heard by some chance passenger on the neighbouring road; I
+therefore went deeper into the dingle.  I sat down with my back against a
+thorn bush; the thorns entered my flesh, and when I felt them, I pressed
+harder against the bush; I thought the pain of the flesh might in some
+degree counteract the mental agony; presently I felt them no longer--the
+power of the mental horror was so great that it was impossible, with that
+upon me, to feel any pain from the thorns.  I continued in this posture a
+long time, undergoing what I cannot describe, and would not attempt if I
+were able.  Several times I was on the point of starting up and rushing
+anywhere; but I restrained myself, for I knew I could not escape from
+myself, so why should I not remain in the dingle?  So I thought and said
+to myself, for my reasoning powers were still uninjured.  At last it
+appeared to me that the horror was not so strong, not quite so strong,
+upon me.  Was it possible that it was relaxing its grasp, releasing its
+prey?  Oh what a mercy! but it could not be; and yet--I looked up to
+heaven, and clasped my hands, and said, 'Our Father.'  I said no more--I
+was too agitated; and now I was almost sure that the horror had done its
+worst.
+
+{picture:I knelt down under the hedge and said, 'Our Father'; but that
+was of no use: page472.jpg}
+
+After a little time I arose, and staggered down yet farther into the
+dingle.  I again found my little horse on the same spot as before.  I put
+my hand to his mouth--he licked my hand.  I flung myself down by him, and
+put my arms round his neck; the creature whinnied, and appeared to
+sympathise with me.  What a comfort to have any one, even a dumb brute,
+to sympathise with me at such a moment!  I clung to my little horse, as
+if for safety and protection.  I laid my head on his neck, and felt
+almost calm.  Presently the fear returned, but not so wild as before; it
+subsided, came again, again subsided; then drowsiness came over me, and
+at last I fell asleep, my head supported on the neck of the little horse.
+I awoke; it was dark, dark night--not a star was to be seen--but I felt
+no fear, the horror had left me.  I arose from the side of the little
+horse, and went into my tent, lay down, and again went to sleep.
+
+I awoke in the morning weak and sore, and shuddering at the remembrance
+of what I had gone through on the preceding day; the sun was shining
+brightly, but it had not yet risen high enough to show its head above the
+trees which fenced the eastern side of the dingle, on which account the
+dingle was wet and dank from the dews of the night.  I kindled my fire,
+and, after sitting by it for some time to warm my frame, I took some of
+the coarse food which I have already mentioned; notwithstanding my late
+struggle, and the coarseness of the fare, I ate with appetite.  My
+provisions had by this time been very much diminished, and I saw that it
+would be speedily necessary, in the event of my continuing to reside in
+the dingle, to lay in a fresh store.  After my meal, I went to the pit
+and filled a can with water, which I brought to the dingle, and then
+again sat down on my stone.  I considered what I should next do: it was
+necessary to do something, or my life in this solitude would be
+insupportable.  What should I do? rouse up my forge and fashion a horse-
+shoe?  But I wanted nerve and heart for such an employment; moreover, I
+had no motive for fatiguing myself in this manner; my own horse was shod,
+no other was at hand, and it is hard to work for the sake of working.
+What should I do? read?  Yes, but I had no other book than the Bible
+which the Welsh Methodist had given me.  Well, why not read the Bible? I
+was once fond of reading the Bible; ay, but those days were long gone by.
+However, I did not see what else I could well do on the present
+occasion--so I determined to read the Bible--it was in Welsh; at any rate
+it might amuse me.  So I took the Bible out of the sack, in which it was
+lying in the cart, and began to read at the place where I chanced to open
+it.  I opened it at that part where the history of Saul commences.  At
+first I read with indifference, but after some time my attention was
+riveted, and no wonder, I had come to the visitations of Saul--those dark
+moments of his, when he did and said such unaccountable things; it almost
+appeared to me that I was reading of myself; I, too, had my visitations,
+dark as ever his were.  Oh, how I sympathised with Saul, the tall dark
+man!  I had read his life before, but it had made no impression on me; it
+had never occurred to me that I was like him; but I now sympathised with
+Saul, for my own dark hour was but recently passed, and, perhaps, would
+soon return again; the dark hour came frequently on Saul.
+
+Time wore away; I finished the book of Saul, and, closing the volume,
+returned it to its place.  I then returned to my seat on the stone, and
+thought of what I had read, and what I had lately undergone.  All at once
+I thought I felt well-known sensations, a cramping of the breast, and a
+tingling of the soles of the feet; they were what I had felt on the
+preceding day--they were the forerunners of the fear.  I sat motionless
+on my stone, the sensations passed away, and the fear came not.  Darkness
+was now coming again over the earth; the dingle was again in deep shade;
+I roused the fire with the breath of the bellows, and sat looking at the
+cheerful glow; it was cheering and comforting.  My little horse came now
+and lay down on the ground beside the forge; I was not quite deserted.  I
+again ate some of the coarse food, and drank plentifully of the water
+which I had fetched in the morning.  I then put fresh fuel on the fire,
+and sat for a long time looking on the blaze; I then went into my tent.
+
+I awoke, on my own calculation, about midnight--it was pitch dark, and
+there was much fear upon me.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXV
+
+
+Free and independent--I don't see why--Oats--A noise--Unwelcome
+visitors--What's the matter?--Good-day to ye--The tall
+girl--Dovrefeld--Blow on the face--Civil enough--What's this?--Vulgar
+woman--Hands off--Gasping for breath--Long Melford--A pretty manoeuvre--A
+long draught--Signs of animation--It won't do--No malice--Bad people.
+
+Two mornings after the period to which I have brought the reader in the
+preceding chapter, I sat by my fire at the bottom of the dingle; I had
+just breakfasted, and had finished the last morsel of food which I had
+brought with me to that solitude.
+
+'What shall I now do?' said I to myself; 'shall I continue here, or
+decamp?--this is a sad lonely spot--perhaps I had better quit it; but
+whither shall I go? the wide world is before me, but what can I do
+therein?  I have been in the world already without much success.  No, I
+had better remain here; the place is lonely, it is true, but here I am
+free and independent, and can do what I please; but I can't remain here
+without food.  Well, I will find my way to the nearest town, lay in a
+fresh supply of provision, and come back, turning my back upon the world,
+which has turned its back upon me.  I don't see why I should not write a
+little sometimes; I have pens and an ink-horn, and for a writing-desk I
+can place the Bible on my knee.  I shouldn't wonder if I could write a
+capital satire on the world on the back of that Bible; but, first of all,
+I must think of supplying myself with food.'
+
+I rose up from the stone on which I was seated, determining to go to the
+nearest town, with my little horse and cart, and procure what I wanted.
+The nearest town, according to my best calculation, lay about five miles
+distant; I had no doubt, however, that, by using ordinary diligence, I
+should be back before evening.  In order to go lighter, I determined to
+leave my tent standing as it was, and all the things which I had
+purchased of the tinker, just as they were.  'I need not be apprehensive
+on their account,' said I to myself; 'nobody will come here to meddle
+with them--the great recommendation of this place is its perfect
+solitude--I daresay that I could live here six months without seeing a
+single human visage.  I will now harness my little gry and be off to the
+town.'
+
+At a whistle which I gave, the little gry, which was feeding on the bank
+near the uppermost part of the dingle, came running to me, for by this
+time he had become so accustomed to me that he would obey my call, for
+all the world as if he had been one of the canine species.  'Now,' said I
+to him, 'we are going to the town to buy bread for myself and oats for
+you--I am in a hurry to be back; therefore I pray you to do your best,
+and to draw me and the cart to the town with all possible speed, and to
+bring us back; if you do your best, I promise you oats on your return.
+You know the meaning of oats, Ambrol?'  Ambrol whinnied as if to let me
+know that he understood me perfectly well, as indeed he well might, as I
+had never once fed him during the time that he had been in my possession
+without saying the word in question to him.  Now, Ambrol, in the gypsy
+tongue, signifieth a pear.
+
+So I caparisoned Ambrol, and then, going to the cart, I removed two or
+three things from it into the tent; I then lifted up the shafts, and was
+just going to call to the pony to come and be fastened to them, when I
+thought I heard a noise.
+
+I stood stock still, supporting the shaft of the little cart in my hand,
+and bending the right side of my face slightly towards the ground, but I
+could hear nothing; the noise which I thought I had heard was not one of
+those sounds which I was accustomed to hear in that solitude--the note of
+a bird, or the rustling of a bough; it was--there I heard it again, a
+sound very much resembling the grating of a wheel amongst gravel.  Could
+it proceed from the road?  Oh no, the road was too far distant for me to
+hear the noise of anything moving along it. Again I listened, and now I
+distinctly heard the sound of wheels, which seemed to be approaching the
+dingle; nearer and nearer they drew, and presently the sound of wheels
+was blended with the murmur of voices.  Anon I heard a boisterous shout,
+which seemed to proceed from the entrance of the dingle.  'Here are folks
+at hand,' said I, letting the shaft of the cart fall to the ground; 'is
+it possible that they can be coming here?'  My doubts on that point, if I
+entertained any, were soon dispelled; the wheels, which had ceased moving
+for a moment or two, were once again in motion, and were now evidently
+moving down the winding path which led to my retreat.  Leaving my cart, I
+came forward and placed myself near the entrance of the open space, with
+my eyes fixed on the path down which my unexpected, and I may say
+unwelcome, visitors were coming.  Presently I heard a stamping or
+sliding, as if of a horse in some difficulty; then a loud curse, and the
+next moment appeared a man and a horse and cart; the former holding the
+head of the horse up to prevent him from falling, of which he was in
+danger, owing to the precipitous nature of the path.  Whilst thus
+occupied, the head of the man was averted from me.  When, however, he had
+reached the bottom of the descent, he turned his head, and perceiving me,
+as I stood bareheaded, without either coat or waistcoat, about two yards
+from him, he gave a sudden start, so violent that the backward motion of
+his hand had nearly flung the horse upon his haunches.
+
+'Why don't you move forward?' said a voice from behind, apparently that
+of a female; 'you are stopping up the way, and we shall be all down upon
+one another'; and I saw the head of another horse overtopping the back of
+the cart.
+
+'Why don't you move forward, Jack?' said another voice, also a female,
+yet higher up the path.
+
+The man stirred not, but remained staring at me in the posture which he
+had assumed on first perceiving me, his body very much drawn back, his
+left foot far in advance of his right, and with his right hand still
+grasping the halter of the horse, which gave way more and more, till it
+was clean down on its haunches.
+
+'What's the matter?' said the voice which I had last heard.
+
+'Get back with you, Belle, Moll,' said the man, still staring at me;
+'here's something not over canny or comfortable.'
+
+'What is it?' said the same voice; 'let me pass, Moll, and I'll soon
+clear the way'; and I heard a kind of rushing down the path.
+
+'You need not be afraid,' said I, addressing myself to the man, 'I mean
+you no harm; I am a wanderer like yourself--come here to seek for
+shelter--you need not be afraid; I am a Roman chabo by matriculation--one
+of the right sort, and no mistake--Good-day to ye, brother; I bid ye
+welcome.'
+
+The man eyed me suspiciously for a moment--then, turning to his horse
+with a loud curse, he pulled him up from his haunches, and led him and
+the cart farther down to one side of the dingle, muttering, as he passed
+me, 'Afraid!  Hm!'
+
+I do not remember ever to have seen a more ruffianly-looking fellow; he
+was about six feet high, with an immensely athletic frame; his face was
+black and bluff, and sported an immense pair of whiskers, but with here
+and there a gray hair, for his age could not be much under fifty.  He
+wore a faded blue frock-coat, corduroys, and highlows; on his black head
+was a kind of red nightcap, round his bull neck a Barcelona
+handkerchief--I did not like the look of the man at all.
+
+'Afraid!' growled the fellow, proceeding to unharness his horse; 'that
+was the word, I think.'
+
+But other figures were now already upon the scene.  Dashing past the
+other horse and cart, which by this time had reached the bottom of the
+pass, appeared an exceedingly tall woman, or rather girl, for she could
+scarcely have been above eighteen; she was dressed in a tight bodice and
+a blue stuff gown; hat, bonnet, or cap she had none, and her hair, which
+was flaxen, hung down on her shoulders unconfined; her complexion was
+fair, and her features handsome, with a determined but open
+expression--she was followed by another female, about forty, stout and
+vulgar-looking, at whom I scarcely glanced, my whole attention being
+absorbed by the tall girl.
+
+'What's the matter, Jack?' said the latter, looking at the man.
+
+'Only afraid, that's all,' said the man, still proceeding with his work.
+
+'Afraid at what--at that lad? why, he looks like a ghost--I would engage
+to thrash him with one hand.'
+
+'You might beat me with no hands at all,' said I, 'fair damsel, only by
+looking at me--I never saw such a face and figure, both regal--why, you
+look like Ingeborg, Queen of Norway; she had twelve brothers, you know,
+and could lick them all, though they were heroes:--
+
+   On Dovrefeld in Norway
+   Were once together seen
+   The twelve heroic brothers
+   Of Ingeborg the queen.'
+
+'None of your chaffing, young fellow,' said the tall girl, 'or I will
+give you what shall make you wipe your face; be civil, or you will rue
+it.'
+
+'Well, perhaps I was a peg too high,' said I; 'I ask your pardon--here's
+something a bit lower:--
+
+   As I was jawing to the gav yeck divvus
+   I met on the drom miro Rommany chi--'
+
+None of your Rommany chies, young fellow,' said the tall girl, looking
+more menacingly than before, and clenching her fist; 'you had better be
+civil, I am none of your chies; and though I keep company with gypsies,
+or, to speak more proper, half-and-halfs, I would have you to know that I
+come of Christian blood and parents, and was born in the great house of
+Long Melford.'
+
+'I have no doubt,' said I, 'that it was a great house; judging from your
+size I shouldn't wonder if you were born in a church.'
+
+'Stay, Belle,' said the man, putting himself before the young virago, who
+was about to rush upon me, 'my turn is first'--then, advancing to me in a
+menacing attitude, he said, with a look of deep malignity, '"Afraid," was
+the word, wasn't it?'
+
+'It was,' said I, 'but I think I wronged you; I should have said, aghast;
+you exhibited every symptom of one labouring under uncontrollable fear.'
+
+The fellow stared at me with a look of stupid ferocity, and appeared to
+be hesitating whether to strike or not: ere he could make up his mind,
+the tall girl started forward, crying, 'He's chaffing; let me at him';
+and before I could put myself on my guard, she struck me a blow on the
+face which had nearly brought me to the ground.
+
+{picture:The fellow stared at me with a look of stupid ferocity, and
+appeared to be hesitating whether to strike or not: page480.jpg}
+
+'Enough,' said I, putting my hand to my cheek; 'you have now performed
+your promise, and made me wipe my face: now be pacified, and tell me
+fairly the grounds of this quarrel.'
+
+'Grounds!' said the fellow; 'didn't you say I was afraid; and if you
+hadn't, who gave you leave to camp on my ground?'
+
+'Is it your ground?' said I.
+
+'A pretty question,' said the fellow; 'as if all the world didn't know
+that.  Do you know who I am?'
+
+'I guess I do,' said I; 'unless I am much mistaken, you are he whom folks
+call the "Flaming Tinman."  To tell you the truth, I'm glad we have met,
+for I wished to see you.  These are your two wives, I suppose; I greet
+them.  There's no harm done--there's room enough here for all of us--we
+shall soon be good friends, I daresay; and when we are a little better
+acquainted, I'll tell you my history.'
+
+'Well, if that doesn't beat all!' said the fellow.
+
+'I don't think he's chaffing now,' said the girl, whose anger seemed to
+have subsided on a sudden; 'the young man speaks civil enough.'
+
+'Civil!' said the fellow, with an oath; 'but that's just like you; with
+you it is a blow, and all over.  Civil!  I suppose you would have him
+stay here, and get into all my secrets, and hear all I may have to say to
+my two morts.'
+
+'Two morts!' said the girl, kindling up, 'where are they?  Speak for one,
+and no more.  I am no mort of yours, whatever some one else may be.  I
+tell you one thing, Black John, or Anselo,--for t'other ain't your
+name,--the same thing I told the young man here, be civil, or you will
+rue it.'
+
+The fellow looked at the girl furiously, but his glance soon quailed
+before hers; he withdrew his eyes, and cast them on my little horse,
+which was feeding amongst the trees.  'What's this?' said he, rushing
+forward and seizing the animal.  'Why, as I am alive, this is the horse
+of that mumping villain Slingsby.'
+
+'It's his no longer; I bought it and paid for it.'
+
+'It's mine now,' said the fellow; 'I swore I would seize it the next time
+I found it on my beat; ay, and beat the master too.'
+
+'I am not Slingsby.'
+
+'All's one for that.'
+
+'You don't say you will beat me?'
+
+'Afraid was the word.'
+
+'I'm sick and feeble.'
+
+'Hold up your fists.'
+
+'Won't the horse satisfy you?'
+
+'Horse nor bellows either.'
+
+'No mercy, then?'
+
+'Here's at you.'
+
+'Mind your eyes, Jack.  There, you've got it.  I thought so,' shouted the
+girl, as the fellow staggered back from a sharp blow in the eye; 'I
+thought he was chaffing at you all along.'
+
+'Never mind, Anselo.  You know what to do--go in,' said the vulgar woman,
+who had hitherto not spoken a word, but who now came forward with all the
+look of a fury; 'go inapopli; you'll smash ten like he.'
+
+The Flaming Tinman took her advice, and came in bent on smashing, but
+stopped short on receiving a left-handed blow on the nose.
+
+'You'll never beat the Flaming Tinman in that way,' said the girl,
+looking at me doubtfully.
+
+And so I began to think myself, when, in the twinkling of an eye, the
+Flaming Tinman, disengaging himself of his frock-coat, and dashing off
+his red night-cap, came rushing in more desperately than ever.  To a
+flush hit which he received in the mouth he paid as little attention as a
+wild bull would have done; in a moment his arms were around me, and in
+another he had hurled me down, falling heavily upon me.  The fellow's
+strength appeared to be tremendous.
+
+'Pay him off now,' said the vulgar woman.  The Flaming Tinman made no
+reply, but, planting his knee on my breast, seized my throat with two
+huge horny hands.  I gave myself up for dead, and probably should have
+been so in another minute but for the tall girl, who caught hold of the
+handkerchief which the fellow wore round his neck, with a grasp nearly as
+powerful us that with which he pressed my throat.
+
+'Do you call that fair play?' said she.
+
+'Hands off, Belle,' said the other woman; 'do you call it fair play to
+interfere? hands off, or I'll be down upon you myself.'
+
+But Belle paid no heed to the injunction, and tugged so hard at the
+handkerchief that the Flaming Tinman was nearly throttled; suddenly
+relinquishing his hold of me, he started on his feet, and aimed a blow at
+my fair preserver, who avoided it, but said coolly:--
+
+'Finish t'other business first, and then I'm your woman whenever you
+like; but finish it fairly--no foul play when I'm by--I'll be the boy's
+second, and Moll can pick up you when he happens to knock you down.'
+
+The battle during the next ten minutes raged with considerable fury, but
+it so happened that during this time I was never able to knock the
+Flaming Tinman down, but on the contrary received six knock-down blows
+myself.  'I can never stand this,' said I, as I sat on the knee of Belle,
+'I am afraid I must give in; the Flaming Tinman hits very hard,' and I
+spat out a mouthful of blood.
+
+'Sure enough you'll never beat the Flaming Tinman in the way you
+fight--it's of no use flipping at the Flaming Tinman with your left hand;
+why don't you use your right?'
+
+'Because I'm not handy with it,' said I; and then getting up, I once more
+confronted the Flaming Tinman, and struck him six blows for his one, but
+they were all left-handed blows, and the blow which the Flaming Tinman
+gave me knocked me off my legs.
+
+'Now, will you use Long Melford?' said Belle, picking me up.
+
+'I don't know what you mean by Long Melford,' said I, gasping for breath.
+
+'Why, this long right of yours,' said Belle, feeling my right arm; 'if
+you do, I shouldn't wonder if you yet stand a chance.'  And now the
+Flaming Tinman was once more ready, much more ready than myself.  I,
+however, rose from my second's knee as well as my weakness would permit
+me.  On he came, striking left and right, appearing almost as fresh as to
+wind and spirit as when he first commenced the combat, though his eyes
+were considerably swelled, and his nether lip was cut in two; on he came,
+striking left and right, and I did not like his blows at all, or even the
+wind of them, which was anything but agreeable, and I gave way before
+him.  At last he aimed a blow which, had it taken full effect, would
+doubtless have ended the battle, but owing to his slipping, the fist only
+grazed my left shoulder, and came with terrific force against a tree,
+close to which I had been driven; before the Tinman could recover
+himself, I collected all my strength, and struck him beneath the ear, and
+then fell to the ground completely exhausted; and it so happened that the
+blow which I struck the Tinker beneath the ear was a right-handed blow.
+
+{picture:His eyes were considerably swelled, and his nether lip was cut
+in two: page483.jpg}
+
+'Hurrah for Long Melford!' I heard Belle exclaim; 'there is nothing like
+Long Melford for shortness, all the world over.'  At these words I turned
+round my head as I lay, and perceived the Flaming Tinman stretched upon
+the ground apparently senseless.  'He is dead,' said the vulgar woman, as
+she vainly endeavoured to raise him up; 'he is dead; the best man in all
+the north country, killed in this fashion, by a boy!'  Alarmed at these
+words, I made shift to get on my feet; and, with the assistance of the
+woman, placed my fallen adversary in a sitting posture.  I put my hand to
+his heart, and felt a slight pulsation--'He's not dead,' said I, 'only
+stunned; if he were let blood, he would recover presently.'  I produced a
+penknife which I had in my pocket, and, baring the arm of the Tinman, was
+about to make the necessary incision, when the woman gave me a violent
+blow, and, pushing me aside, exclaimed, 'I'll tear the eyes out of your
+head if you offer to touch him.  Do you want to complete your work, and
+murder him outright, now he's asleep? you have had enough of his blood
+already.'  'You are mad,' said I, 'I only seek to do him service.  Well,
+if you won't let him be blooded, fetch some water and fling it in his
+face, you know where the pit is.'
+
+{picture:It so happened that the blow which I struck the Tinker beneath
+the ear was a right-handed blow: page485.jpg}
+
+'A pretty manoeuvre!' said the woman; 'leave my husband in the hands of
+you and that limmer, who has never been true to us--I should find him
+strangled or his throat cut when I came back.'  'Do you go,' said I to
+the tall girl; 'take the can and fetch some water from the pit.'  'You
+had better go yourself,' said the girl, wiping a tear as she looked on
+the yet senseless form of the Tinker; 'you had better go yourself, if you
+think water will do him good.'  I had by this time somewhat recovered my
+exhausted powers, and, taking the can, I bent my steps as fast as I could
+to the pit; arriving there, I lay down on the brink, took a long draught,
+and then plunged my head into the water; after which I filled the can,
+and bent my way back to the dingle.  Before I could reach the path which
+led down into its depths, I had to pass some way along its side; I had
+arrived at a part immediately over the scene of the last encounter, where
+the bank, overgrown with trees, sloped precipitously down.  Here I heard
+a loud sound of voices in the dingle; I stopped, and laying hold of a
+tree, leaned over the bank and listened.  The two women appeared to be in
+hot dispute in the dingle.  'It was all owing to you, you limmer,' said
+the vulgar woman to the other; 'had you not interfered, the old man would
+soon have settled the boy.'
+
+'I'm for fair play and Long Melford,' said the other.  'If your old man,
+as you call him, could have settled the boy fairly, he might for all I
+should have cared, but no foul work for me, and as for sticking the boy
+with our gulleys when he comes back, as you proposed, I am not so fond of
+your old man or you that I should oblige you in it, to my soul's
+destruction.'  'Hold your tongue, or I'll--'  I listened no farther, but
+hastened as fast as I could to the dingle.  My adversary had just begun
+to show signs of animation; the vulgar woman was still supporting him,
+and occasionally cast glances of anger at the tall girl, who was walking
+slowly up and down.  I lost no time in dashing the greater part of the
+water into the Tinman's face, whereupon he sneezed, moved his hands, and
+presently looked round him.  At first his looks were dull and heavy, and
+without any intelligence at all; he soon, however, began to recollect
+himself, and to be conscious of his situation; he cast a scowling glance
+at me, then one of the deepest malignity at the tall girl, who was still
+walking about without taking much notice of what was going forward.  At
+last he looked at his right hand, which had evidently suffered from the
+blow against the tree, and a half-stifled curse escaped his lips.  The
+vulgar woman now said something to him in a low tone, whereupon he looked
+at her for a moment, and then got upon his legs.  Again the vulgar woman
+said something to him; her looks were furious, and she appeared to be
+urging him on to attempt something.  I observed that she had a clasped
+knife in her hand.  The fellow remained standing for some time as if
+hesitating what to do; at last he looked at his hand, and, shaking his
+head, said something to the woman which I did not understand.  The tall
+girl, however, appeared to overhear him, and, probably repeating his
+words, said, 'No, it won't do; you are right there; and now hear what I
+have to say,--let bygones be bygones, and let us all shake hands, and
+camp here, as the young man was saying just now.'  The man looked at her,
+and then, without any reply, went to his horse, which was lying down
+among the trees, and kicking it up, led it to the cart, to which he
+forthwith began to harness it.  The other cart and horse had remained
+standing motionless during the whole affair which I have been recounting,
+at the bottom of the pass.  The woman now took the horse by the head, and
+leading it with the cart into the open part of the dingle, turned both
+round, and then led them back, till the horse and cart had mounted a
+little way up the ascent; she then stood still and appeared to be
+expecting the man.  During this proceeding Belle had stood looking on
+without saying anything; at last, perceiving that the man had harnessed
+his horse to the other cart, and that both he and the woman were about to
+take their departure, she said, 'You are not going, are you?'  Receiving
+no answer, she continued: 'I tell you what, both of you, Black John, and
+you Moll, his mort, this is not treating me over civilly,--however, I am
+ready to put up with it, and to go with you if you like, for I bear no
+malice.  I'm sorry for what has happened, but you have only yourselves to
+thank for it.  Now, shall I go with you, only tell me?'  The man made no
+manner of reply, but flogged his horse.  The woman, however, whose
+passions were probably under less control, replied, with a screeching
+tone, 'Stay where you are, you jade, and may the curse of Judas cling to
+you,--stay with the bit of a mullo whom you helped, and my only hope is
+that he may gulley you before he comes to be . . . . Have you with us,
+indeed! after what's past! no, nor nothing belonging to you.  Fetch down
+your mailia go-cart and live here with your chabo.'  She then whipped on
+the horse, and ascended the pass, followed by the man.  The carts were
+light, and they were not long in ascending the winding path.  I followed
+to see that they took their departure.  Arriving at the top, I found near
+the entrance a small donkey-cart, which I concluded belonged to the girl.
+The tinker and his mort were already at some distance; I stood looking
+after them for a little time, then taking the donkey by the reins I led
+it with the cart to the bottom of the dingle.  Arrived there, I found
+Belle seated on the stone by the fireplace.  Her hair was all
+dishevelled, and she was in tears.
+
+'They were bad people,' said she, 'and I did not like them, but they were
+my only acquaintance in the wide world.'
+
+{picture:The tinker and his mort were already at some distance; I stood
+looking after them for a little time: page488.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXVI
+
+
+At tea--Vapours--Isopel Berners--Softly and kindly--Sweet pretty
+creature--Bread and water--Two sailors--Truth and constancy--Very
+strangely.
+
+In the evening of that same day the tall girl and I sat at tea by the
+fire, at the bottom of the dingle; the girl on a small stool, and myself,
+as usual, upon my stone.
+
+The water which served for the tea had been taken from a spring of
+pellucid water in the neighbourhood, which I had not had the good fortune
+to discover, though it was well known to my companion, and to the
+wandering people who frequented the dingle.
+
+'This tea is very good,' said I, 'but I cannot enjoy it as much as if I
+were well: I feel very sadly.'
+
+'How else should you feel,' said the girl, 'after fighting with the
+Flaming Tinman?  All I wonder at is that you can feel at all!  As for the
+tea, it ought to be good, seeing that it cost me ten shillings a pound.'
+
+'That's a great deal for a person in your station to pay.'
+
+'In my station!  I'd have you to know, young man--however, I haven't the
+heart to quarrel with you, you look so ill; and after all, it is a good
+sum for one to pay who travels the roads; but if I must have tea, I like
+to have the best; and tea I must have, for I am used to it, though I
+can't help thinking that it sometimes fills my head with strange
+fancies--what some folks call vapours, making me weep and cry.'
+
+'Dear me,' said I, 'I should never have thought that one of your size and
+fierceness would weep and cry!'
+
+'My size and fierceness!  I tell you what, young man, you are not over
+civil this evening; but you are ill, as I said before, and I shan't take
+much notice of your language, at least for the present; as for my size, I
+am not so much bigger than yourself; and as for being fierce, you should
+be the last one to fling that at me.  It is well for you that I can be
+fierce sometimes.  If I hadn't taken your part against Blazing Bosville,
+you wouldn't be now taking tea with me.'
+
+'It is true that you struck me in the face first; but we'll let that
+pass.  So that man's name is Bosville; what's your own?'
+
+'Isopel Berners.'
+
+{picture:Isopel Berners: page491.jpg}
+
+'How did you get that name?'
+
+'I say, young man, you seem fond of asking questions: will you have
+another cup of tea?'
+
+'I was just going to ask for another.'
+
+'Well, then, here it is, and much good may it do you; as for my name, I
+got it from my mother.'
+
+'Your mother's name, then, was Isopel!'
+
+'Isopel Berners.'
+
+'But had you never a father?'
+
+'Yes, I had a father,' said the girl, sighing, 'but I don't bear his
+name.'
+
+'Is it the fashion, then, in your country for children to bear their
+mother's name?'
+
+'If you ask such questions, young man, I shall be angry with you.  I have
+told you my name, and, whether my father's or mother's, I am not ashamed
+of it.'
+
+'It is a noble name.'
+
+'There you are right, young man.  The chaplain in the great house where I
+was born told me it was a noble name; it was odd enough, he said, that
+the only three noble names in the county were to be found in the great
+house; mine was one; the other two were Devereux and Bohun.'
+
+'What do you mean by the great house?'
+
+'The workhouse.'
+
+'Is it possible that you were born there?'
+
+'Yes, young man; and as you now speak softly and kindly, I will tell you
+my whole tale.  My father was an officer of the sea, and was killed at
+sea as he was coming home to marry my mother, Isopel Berners.  He had
+been acquainted with her, and had left her; but after a few months he
+wrote her a letter, to say that he had no rest, and that he repented, and
+that as soon as his ship came to port he would do her all the reparation
+in his power.  Well, young man, the very day before they reached port
+they met the enemy, and there was a fight, and my father was killed,
+after he had struck down six of the enemy's crew on their own deck; for
+my father was a big man, as I have heard, and knew tolerably well how to
+use his hands, And when my mother heard the news, she became half
+distracted, and ran away into the fields and forests, totally neglecting
+her business, for she was a small milliner; and so she ran demented about
+the meads and forests for a long time, now sitting under a tree, and now
+by the side of a river--at last she flung herself into some water, and
+would have been drowned, had not some one been at hand and rescued her,
+whereupon she was conveyed to the great house, lest she should attempt to
+do herself farther mischief, for she had neither friends nor parents--and
+there she died three months after, having first brought me into the
+world.  She was a sweet pretty creature, I'm told, but hardly fit for
+this world, being neither large, nor fierce, nor able to take her own
+part.  So I was born and bred in the great house, where I learnt to read
+and sew, to fear God, and to take my own part.  When I was fourteen I was
+put out to service to a small farmer and his wife, with whom, however, I
+did not stay long, for I was half-starved, and otherwise ill treated,
+especially by my mistress, who one day attempting to knock me down with a
+besom, I knocked her down with my fist, and went back to the great
+house.'
+
+'And how did they receive you in the great house?'
+
+'Not very kindly, young man--on the contrary, I was put into a dark room,
+where I was kept a fortnight on bread and water; I did not much care,
+however, being glad to have got back to the great house at any rate--the
+place where I was born, and where my poor mother died; and in the great
+house I continued two years longer, reading and sewing, fearing God, and
+taking my own part when necessary.  At the end of the two years I was
+again put out to service, but this time to a rich farmer and his wife,
+with whom, however, I did not live long, less time, I believe, than with
+the poor ones, being obliged to leave for--'
+
+'Knocking your mistress down?'
+
+'No, young man, knocking my master down, who conducted himself improperly
+towards me.  This time I did not go back to the great house, having a
+misgiving that they would not receive me; so I turned my back to the
+great house where I was born, and where my poor mother died, and wandered
+for several days I know not whither, supporting myself on a few halfpence
+which I chanced to have in my pocket.  It happened one day, as I sat
+under a hedge crying, having spent my last farthing, that a comfortable-
+looking elderly woman came up in a cart, and seeing the state in which I
+was, she stopped and asked what was the matter with me; I told her some
+part of my story, whereupon she said, 'Cheer up, my dear; if you like,
+you shall go with me, and wait upon me.'  Of course I wanted little
+persuasion, so I got into the cart and went with her.  She took me to
+London and various other places, and I soon found that she was a
+travelling woman, who went about the country with silks and linen.  I was
+of great use to her, more especially in those places where we met evil
+company.  Once, as we were coming from Dover, we were met by two sailors,
+who stopped our cart, and would have robbed and stripped us.  'Let me get
+down,' said I; so I got down, and fought with them both, till they turned
+round and ran away.  Two years I lived with the old gentlewoman, who was
+very kind to me, almost as kind as a mother; at last she fell sick at a
+place in Lincolnshire, and after a few days died, leaving me her cart and
+stock in trade, praying me only to see her decently buried--which I did,
+giving her a funeral fit for a gentlewoman.  After which I travelled the
+country--melancholy enough for want of company, but so far fortunate,
+that I could take my own part when anybody was uncivil to me.  At last,
+passing through the valley of Todmorden, I formed the acquaintance of
+Blazing Bosville and his wife, with whom I occasionally took journeys for
+company's sake, for it is melancholy to travel about alone, even when one
+can take one's own part.  I soon found they were evil people; but, upon
+the whole, they treated me civilly, and I sometimes lent them a little
+money, so that we got on tolerably well together.  He and I, it is true,
+had once a dispute, and nearly came to blows; for once, when we were
+alone, he wanted me to marry him, promising, if I would, to turn off Grey
+Moll, or, if I liked it better, to make her wait upon me as a
+maid-servant; I never liked him much, but from that hour less than ever.
+Of the two, I believe Grey Moll to be the best, for she is at any rate
+true and faithful to him, and I like truth and constancy--don't you,
+young man?'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'they are very nice things.  I feel very strangely.'
+
+'How do you feel, young man?
+
+'Very much afraid.'
+
+'Afraid, at what?  At the Flaming Tinman?  Don't be afraid of him.  He
+won't come back, and if he did, he shouldn't touch you in this state, I'd
+fight him for you; but he won't come back, so you needn't be afraid of
+him.'
+
+'I'm not afraid of the Flaming Tinman.'
+
+'What, then, are you afraid of?'
+
+'The evil one.'
+
+'The evil one!' said the girl, 'where is he?'
+
+'Coming upon me.'
+
+'Never heed,' said the girl, 'I'll stand by you.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXVII
+
+
+Hubbub of voices--No offence--Nodding--The guests.
+
+The kitchen of the public-house was a large one, and many people were
+drinking in it; there was a confused hubbub of voices.
+
+I sat down on a bench behind a deal table, of which there were three or
+four in the kitchen; presently a bulky man, in a green coat of the
+Newmarket cut, and without a hat, entered, and observing me, came up, and
+in rather a gruff tone cried, 'Want anything, young fellow?'
+
+'Bring me a jug of ale,' said I, 'if you are the master, as I suppose you
+are, by that same coat of yours, and your having no hat on your head.'
+
+'Don't be saucy, young fellow,' said the landlord, for such he was;
+'don't be saucy, or--'  Whatever he intended to say he left unsaid, for
+fixing his eyes upon one of my hands, which I had placed by chance upon
+the table, he became suddenly still.
+
+This was my left hand, which was raw and swollen, from the blows dealt on
+a certain hard skull in a recent combat.  'What do you mean by staring at
+my hand so?' said I, withdrawing it from the table.
+
+'No offence, young man, no offence,' said the landlord, in a quite
+altered tone; 'but the sight of your hand--' then observing that our
+conversation began to attract the notice of the guests in the kitchen, he
+interrupted himself, saying in an undertone, 'But mum's the word for the
+present, I will go and fetch the ale.'
+
+In about a minute he returned, with a jug of ale foaming high.  'Here's
+your health,' said he, blowing off the foam, and drinking; but perceiving
+that I looked rather dissatisfied, he murmured, 'All's right, I glory in
+you; but mum's the word.'  Then, placing the jug on the table, he gave me
+a confidential nod, and swaggered out of the room.
+
+What can the silly impertinent fellow mean? thought I; but the ale was
+now before me, and I hastened to drink, for my weakness was great, and my
+mind was full of dark thoughts, the remains of the indescribable horror
+of the preceding night.  It may kill me, thought I, as I drank deep--but
+who cares? anything is better than what I have suffered.  I drank deep,
+and then leaned back against the wall: it appeared as if a vapour was
+stealing up into my brain, gentle and benign, soothing and stifling the
+horror and the fear; higher and higher it mounted, and I felt nearly
+overcome; but the sensation was delicious, compared with that I had
+lately experienced, and now I felt myself nodding; and, bending down, I
+laid my head on the table on my folded hands.
+
+And in that attitude I remained some time, perfectly unconscious.  At
+length, by degrees, perception returned, and I lifted up my head.  I felt
+somewhat dizzy and bewildered, but the dark shadow had withdrawn itself
+from me.  And now once more I drank of the jug; this second draught did
+not produce an overpowering effect upon me--it revived and strengthened
+me--I felt a new man.
+
+I looked around me; the kitchen had been deserted by the greater part of
+the guests; besides myself, only four remained; these were seated at the
+farther end.  One was haranguing fiercely and eagerly; he was abusing
+England, and praising America.  At last he exclaimed, 'So when I gets to
+New York, I will toss up my hat, and damn the King.'
+
+That man must be a Radical, thought I.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXVIII
+
+
+A Radical--Simple-looking man--Church of England--The
+President--Aristocracy--Gin and water--Mending the roads--Persecuting
+Church--Simon de Montfort--Broken bells--Get up--Not for the Pope--Quay
+of New York--Mumpers' Dingle--No wish to fight--First draught--A poor
+pipe--Half-a-crown broke.
+
+The individual whom I supposed to be a Radical, after a short pause,
+again uplifted his voice; he was rather a strong-built fellow of about
+thirty, with an ill-favoured countenance, a white hat on his head, a
+snuff-coloured coat on his back, and when he was not speaking, a pipe in
+his mouth.  'Who would live in such a country as England?' he shouted.
+
+'There is no country like America,' said his nearest neighbour, a man
+also in a white hat, and of a very ill-favoured countenance--'there is no
+country like America,' said he, withdrawing a pipe from his mouth; 'I
+think I shall--' and here he took a draught from a jug, the contents of
+which he appeared to have in common with the other,--'go to America one
+of these days myself.'
+
+'Poor old England is not such a bad country, after all,' said a third, a
+simple-looking man in a labouring dress, who sat smoking a pipe without
+anything before him.  'If there was but a little more work to be got, I
+should have nothing to say against her; I hope, however--'
+
+'You hope! who cares what you hope?' interrupted the first, in a savage
+tone; 'you are one of those sneaking hounds who are satisfied with dogs'
+wages--a bit of bread and a kick.  Work, indeed! who, with the spirit of
+a man, would work for a country where there is neither liberty of speech
+nor of action? a land full of beggarly aristocracy, hungry
+borough-mongers, insolent parsons, and "their . . . wives and daughters,"
+as William Cobbett says, in his "Register."'
+
+'Ah, the Church of England has been a source of incalculable mischief to
+these realms,' said another.
+
+The person who uttered these words sat rather aloof from the rest; he was
+dressed in a long black surtout.  I could not see much of his face,
+partly owing to his keeping it very much directed to the ground, and
+partly owing to a large slouched hat which he wore; I observed, however,
+that his hair was of a reddish tinge.  On the table near him was a glass
+and spoon.
+
+'You are quite right,' said the first, alluding to what this last had
+said, 'the Church of England has done incalculable mischief here.  I
+value no religion three halfpence, for I believe in none; but the one
+that I hate most is the Church of England; so when I get to New York,
+after I have shown the fine fellows on the quay a spice of me, by . . .
+the King, I'll toss up my hat again, and . . . the Church of England
+too.'
+
+'And suppose the people of New York should clap you in the stocks?' said
+I.
+
+These words drew upon me the attention of the whole four.  The Radical
+and his companion stared at me ferociously; the man in black gave me a
+peculiar glance from under his slouched hat; the simple-looking man in
+the labouring dress laughed.
+
+'What are you laughing at, you fool?' said the Radical, turning and
+looking at the other, who appeared to be afraid of him; 'hold your noise;
+and a pretty fellow, you,' said he, looking at me, 'to come here, and
+speak against the great American nation.'
+
+'I speak against the great American nation!' said I; 'I rather paid them
+a compliment.'
+
+'By supposing they would put me in the stocks.  Well, I call it abusing
+them, to suppose they would do any such thing--stocks, indeed!--there are
+no stocks in all the land.  Put me in the stocks! why, the President will
+come down to the quay, and ask me to dinner, as soon as he hears what I
+have said about the King and Church.'
+
+'I shouldn't wonder,' said I, 'if you go to America you will say of the
+President and country what now you say of the King and Church, and cry
+out for somebody to send you back to England.'
+
+The Radical dashed his pipe to pieces against the table.  'I tell you
+what, young fellow, you are a spy of the aristocracy, sent here to kick
+up a disturbance.'
+
+'Kicking up a disturbance,' said I, 'is rather inconsistent with the
+office of spy.  If I were a spy, I should hold my head down, and say
+nothing.'
+
+The man in black partially raised his head, and gave me another peculiar
+glance.
+
+'Well, if you aren't sent to spy, you are sent to bully, to prevent
+people speaking, and to run down the great American nation; but you
+shan't bully me.  I say, down with the aristocracy, the beggarly British
+aristocracy.  Come, what have you to say to that?'
+
+'Nothing,' said I.
+
+'Nothing!' repeated the Radical.
+
+'No,' said I, 'down with them as soon as you can.'
+
+'As soon as I can!  I wish I could.  But I can down with a bully of
+theirs.  Come, will you fight for them?'
+
+'No,' said I.
+
+'You won't?
+
+'No,' said I; 'though, from what I have seen of them, I should say they
+are tolerably able to fight for themselves.'
+
+'You won't fight for them,' said the Radical triumphantly; 'I thought so;
+all bullies, especially those of the aristocracy, are cowards.  Here,
+landlord,' said he, raising his voice, and striking against the table
+with the jug, 'some more ale--he won't fight for his friends.'
+
+'A white feather,' said his companion.
+
+'He! he!' tittered the man in black.
+
+'Landlord, landlord,' shouted the Radical, striking the table with the
+jug louder than before.  'Who called?' said the landlord, coming in at
+last.  'Fill this jug again,' said the other, 'and be quick about it.'
+'Does any one else want anything?' said the landlord.  'Yes,' said the
+man in black; 'you may bring me another glass of gin and water.'  'Cold?'
+said the landlord.  'Yes,' said the man in black, 'with a lump of sugar
+in it.'
+
+'Gin and water cold, with a lump of sugar in it,' said I, and struck the
+table with my fist.
+
+'Take some?' said the landlord, inquiringly.
+
+'No,' said I, 'only something came into my head.'
+
+'He's mad,' said the man in black.
+
+'Not he,' said the Radical.  'He's only shamming; he knows his master is
+here, and therefore has recourse to these manoeuvres, but it won't do.
+Come, landlord, what are you staring at?  Why don't you obey your orders?
+Keeping your customers waiting in this manner is not the way to increase
+your business.'
+
+The landlord looked at the Radical, and then at me.  At last, taking the
+jug and glass, he left the apartment, and presently returned with each
+filled with its respective liquor.  He placed the jug with beer before
+the Radical, and the glass with the gin and water before the man in
+black, and then, with a wink to me, he sauntered out.
+
+'Here is your health, sir,' said the man of the snuff-coloured coat,
+addressing himself to the one in black; 'I honour you for what you said
+about the Church of England.  Every one who speaks against the Church of
+England has my warm heart.  Down with it, I say, and may the stones of it
+be used for mending the roads, as my friend William says in his
+Register.'
+
+The man in black, with a courteous nod of his head, drank to the man in
+the snuff-coloured coat.  'With respect to the steeples,' said he, 'I am
+not altogether of your opinion; they might be turned to better account
+than to serve to mend the roads; they might still be used as places of
+worship, but not for the worship of the Church of England.  I have no
+fault to find with the steeples, it is the Church itself which I am
+compelled to arraign; but it will not stand long, the respectable part of
+its ministers are already leaving it.  It is a bad Church, a persecuting
+Church.'
+
+'Whom does it persecute?' said I.
+
+The man in black glanced at me slightly, and then replied slowly, 'The
+Catholics.'
+
+'And do those whom you call Catholics never persecute?' said I.
+
+'Never,' said the man in black.
+
+'Did you ever read Foxe's _Book of Martyrs_?' said I.
+
+'He! he!' tittered the man in black; 'there is not a word of truth in
+Foxe's _Book of Martyrs_.'
+
+'Ten times more than in the _Flos Sanctorum_,' said I.
+
+The man in black looked at me, but made no answer.
+
+'And what say you to the Massacre of the Albigenses and the Vaudois,
+"whose bones lie scattered on the cold Alp," or the Revocation of the
+Edict of Nantes?'
+
+The man in black made no answer.
+
+'Go to,' said I; 'it is because the Church of England is not a
+persecuting church, that those whom you call the respectable part are
+leaving her; it is because they can't do with the poor Dissenters what
+Simon de Montfort did with the Albigenses, and the cruel Piedmontese with
+the Vaudois, that they turn to bloody Rome; the Pope will no doubt
+welcome them, for the Pope, do you see, being very much in want, will
+welcome--'
+
+'Hollo!' said the Radical, interfering, 'what are you saying about the
+Pope?  I say, hurrah for the Pope; I value no religion three halfpence,
+as I said before, but if I were to adopt any, it should be the Popish as
+it's called, because I conceives the Popish to be the grand enemy of the
+Church of England, of the beggarly aristocracy, and the borough-monger
+system, so I won't hear the Pope abused while I am by.  Come, don't look
+fierce.  You won't fight, you know, I have proved it; but I will give you
+another chance--I will fight for the Pope, will you fight against him?'
+
+'Oh dear me, yes,' said I, getting up and stepping forward.  'I am a
+quiet peaceable young man, and, being so, am always ready to fight
+against the Pope--the enemy of all peace and quiet; to refuse fighting
+for the aristocracy is a widely different thing from refusing to fight
+against the Pope; so come on, if you are disposed to fight for him.  To
+the Pope broken bells, to Saint James broken shells.  No Popish vile
+oppression, but the Protestant succession. Confusion to the Groyne,
+hurrah for the Boyne, for the army at Clonmel, and the Protestant young
+gentlemen who live there as well.'
+
+'An Orangeman,' said the man in black.
+
+'Not a Platitude,' said I.
+
+The man in black gave a slight start.
+
+'Amongst that family,' said I, 'no doubt, something may be done, but
+amongst the Methodist preachers I should conceive that the success would
+not be great.'
+
+The man in black sat quite still.
+
+'Especially amongst those who have wives,' I added.
+
+The man in black stretched his hand towards his gin and water.
+
+'However,' said I, 'we shall see what the grand movement will bring
+about, and the results of the lessons in elocution.'
+
+The man in black lifted the glass up to his mouth, and, in doing so, let
+the spoon fall.
+
+'But what has this to do with the main question?' said I; 'I am waiting
+here to fight against the Pope.'
+
+'Come, Hunter,' said the companion of the man in the snuff coloured coat,
+'get up, and fight for the Pope.'
+
+'I don't care for the young fellow,' said the man in the snuff-coloured
+coat.
+
+'I know you don't,' said the other, 'so get up, and serve him out.'
+
+'I could serve out three like him,' said the man in the snuff-coloured
+coat.
+
+'So much the better for you,' said the other, 'the present work will be
+all the easier for you, get up, and serve him out at once.'
+
+The man in the snuff-coloured coat did not stir.
+
+'Who shows the white feather now?' said the simple-looking man.
+
+'He! he! he!' tittered the man in black.
+
+'Who told you to interfere?' said the Radical, turning ferociously
+towards the simple-looking man; 'say another word and I'll--'  'And you!'
+said he, addressing himself to the man in black, 'a pretty fellow you to
+turn against me, after I had taken your part.  I tell you what, you may
+fight for yourself.  I'll see you and your Pope in the pit of Eldon
+before I fight for either of you, so make the most of it.'
+
+'Then you won't fight?' said I.
+
+'Not for the Pope,' said the Radical; 'I'll see the Pope--'
+
+'Dear me!' said I, 'not fight for the Pope, whose religion you would turn
+to, if you were inclined for any.  I see how it is, you are not fond of
+fighting; but I'll give you another chance--you were abusing the Church
+of England just now: I'll fight for it--will you fight against it?'
+
+'Come, Hunter,' said the other, 'get up, and fight against the Church of
+England.'
+
+'I have no particular quarrel against the Church of England,' said the
+man in the snuff-coloured coat, 'my quarrel is with the aristocracy.  If
+I said anything against the Church, it was merely for a bit of corollary,
+as Master William Cobbett would say; the quarrel with the Church belongs
+to this fellow in black, so let him carry it on.  However,' he continued
+suddenly, 'I won't slink from the matter either; it shall never be said
+by the fine fellows on the quay of New York that I wouldn't fight against
+the Church of England.  So down with the beggarly aristocracy, the
+Church, and the Pope to the bottom of the pit of Eldon, and may the Pope
+fall first, and the others upon him.'
+
+Thereupon, dashing his hat on the table, he placed himself in an attitude
+of offence and rushed forward.  He was, as I have said before, a powerful
+fellow, and might have proved a dangerous antagonist, more especially to
+myself, who, after my recent encounter with the Flaming Tinman, and my
+wrestlings with the evil one, was in anything but fighting order.  Any
+collision, however, was prevented by the landlord, who, suddenly
+appearing, thrust himself between us.  'There shall be no fighting here,'
+said he; 'no one shall fight in this house, except it be with myself; so
+if you two have anything to say to each other, you had better go into the
+field behind the house.  But, you fool,' said he, pushing Hunter
+violently on the breast, 'do you know whom you are going to tackle
+with?--this is the young chap that beat Blazing Bosville, only as late as
+yesterday, in Mumpers' Dingle.  Grey Moll told me all about it last
+night, when she came for some brandy for her husband, who, she said, had
+been half killed; and she described the young man to me so closely that I
+knew him at once, that is, as soon as I saw how his left hand was
+bruised, for she told me he was a left-hand hitter.  Aren't it all true,
+young man?  Aren't you he that beat Flaming Bosville, in Mumpers'
+Dingle?'  'I never beat Flaming Bosville,' said I, 'he beat himself.  Had
+he not struck his hand against a tree, I shouldn't be here at the present
+moment.'  'Hear, hear!' said the landlord, 'now that's just as it should
+be; I like a modest man, for, as the parson says, nothing sits better
+upon a young man than modesty.  I remember, when I was young, fighting
+with Tom of Hopton, the best man that ever pulled off coat in England.  I
+remember, too, that I won the battle; for I happened to hit Tom of Hopton
+in the mark, as he was coming in, so that he lost his wind, and falling
+squelch on the ground, do ye see, he lost the battle, though I am free to
+confess that he was a better man than myself; indeed, the best man that
+ever fought in England; yet still, I won the battle, as every customer of
+mine, and everybody within twelve miles round, has heard over and over
+again.  Now, Mr. Hunter, I have one thing to say, if you choose to go
+into the field behind the house, and fight the young man, you can.  I'll
+back him for ten pounds; but no fighting in my kitchen--because why?  I
+keeps a decent kind of an establishment.'
+
+'I have no wish to fight the young man,' said Hunter; 'more especially as
+he has nothing to say for the aristocracy.  If he chose to fight for
+them, indeed--but he won't, I know; for I see he's a decent, respectable
+young man; and, after all, fighting is a blackguard way of settling a
+dispute; so I have no wish to fight; however, there is one thing I'll
+do,' said he, uplifting his fist, 'I'll fight this fellow in black here
+for half a crown, or for nothing, if he pleases; it was he that got up
+the last dispute between me and the young man, with his Pope and his
+nonsense; so I will fight him for anything he pleases, and perhaps the
+young man will be my second; whilst you--'
+
+'Come, Doctor,' said the landlord, 'or whatsoever you be, will you go
+into the field with Hunter?  I'll second you, only you must back
+yourself.  I'll lay five pounds on Hunter, if you are inclined to back
+yourself; and will help you to win it as far, do you see, as a second
+can; because why?  I always likes to do the fair thing.'
+
+'Oh, I have no wish to fight,' said the man in black, hastily; 'fighting
+is not my trade.  If I have given any offence, I beg anybody's pardon.'
+
+'Landlord,' said I, 'what have I to pay?
+
+'Nothing at all,' said the landlord; 'glad to see you.  This is the first
+time that you have been at my house, and I never charge new customers, at
+least customers such as you, anything for the first draught.  You'll come
+again, I daresay; shall always be glad to see you.  I won't take it,'
+said he, as I put sixpence on the table; 'I won't take it.'
+
+'Yes, you shall,' said I; 'but not in payment for anything I have had
+myself: it shall serve to pay for a jug of ale for that gentleman,' said
+I, pointing to the simple-looking individual; 'he is smoking a poor pipe.
+I do not mean to say that a pipe is a bad thing; but a pipe without ale,
+do you see--'
+
+'Bravo!' said the landlord, 'that's just the conduct I like.'
+
+'Bravo!' said Hunter.  'I shall be happy to drink with the young man
+whenever I meet him at New York, where, do you see, things are better
+managed than here.'
+
+'If I have given offence to anybody,' said the man in black, 'I repeat
+that I ask pardon,--more especially to the young gentleman, who was
+perfectly right to stand up for his religion, just as I--not that I am of
+any particular religion, no more than this honest gentleman here,' bowing
+to Hunter; 'but I happen to know something of the Catholics--several
+excellent friends of mine are Catholics--and of a surety the Catholic
+religion is an ancient religion, and a widely-extended religion, though
+it certainly is not a universal religion, but it has of late made
+considerable progress, even amongst those nations who have been
+particularly opposed to it--amongst the Prussians and the Dutch, for
+example, to say nothing of the English; and then, in the East, amongst
+the Persians, amongst the Armenians.'
+
+'The Armenians,' said I; 'oh dear me, the Armenians--'
+
+'Have you anything to say about those people, sir?' said the man in
+black, lifting up his glass to his mouth.
+
+'I have nothing further to say,' said I, 'than that the roots of Ararat
+are occasionally found to be deeper than those of Rome.'
+
+'There's half-a-crown broke,' said the landlord, as the man in black let
+fall the glass, which was broken to pieces on the floor.  'You will pay
+me the damage, friend, before you leave this kitchen.  I like to see
+people drink freely in my kitchen, but not too freely, and I hate
+breakages; because why?  I keeps a decent kind of an establishment.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXXXIX
+
+
+The dingle--Give them ale--Not over complimentary--America--Many
+people--Washington--Promiscuous company--Language of the roads--The old
+women--Numerals--The man in black.
+
+The public-house where the scenes which I have attempted to describe in
+the preceding chapters took place, was at the distance of about two miles
+from the dingle.  The sun was sinking in the west by the time I returned
+to the latter spot.  I found Belle seated by a fire, over which her
+kettle was suspended.  During my absence she had prepared herself a kind
+of tent, consisting of large hoops covered over with tarpaulins, quite
+impenetrable to rain, however violent.  'I am glad you are returned,'
+said she, as soon as she perceived me; 'I began to be anxious about you.
+Did you take my advice?'
+
+'Yes,' said I; 'I went to the public-house and drank ale, as you advised
+me; it cheered, strengthened, and drove away the horror from my mind--I
+am much beholden to you.'
+
+'I knew it would do you good,' said Belle; 'I remembered that when the
+poor women in the great house were afflicted with hysterics, and fearful
+imaginings, the surgeon, who was a good kind man, used to say, "Ale, give
+them ale, and let it be strong."'
+
+'He was no advocate for tea, then?' said I.
+
+'He had no objection to tea; but he used to say, "Everything in its
+season."  Shall we take ours now?--I have waited for you.'
+
+'I have no objection,' said I; 'I feel rather heated, and at present
+should prefer tea to ale--"Everything in its season," as the surgeon
+said.'
+
+Thereupon Belle prepared tea, and, as we were taking it, she said--'What
+did you see and hear at the public-house?'
+
+'Really,' said I, 'you appear to have your full portion of curiosity;
+what matters it to you what I saw and heard at the public-house?'
+
+'It matters very little to me,' said Belle; 'I merely inquired of you,
+for the sake of a little conversation--you were silent, and it is
+uncomfortable for two people to sit together without opening their
+lips--at least I think so.'
+
+'One only feels uncomfortable,' said I, 'in being silent, when one
+happens to be thinking of the individual with whom one is in company.  To
+tell you the truth, I was not thinking of my companion, but of certain
+company with whom I had been at the public-house.'
+
+'Really, young man,' said Belle, 'you are not over complimentary; but who
+may this wonderful company have been--some young--?' and here Belle
+stopped.
+
+'No,' said I, 'there was no young person--if person you were going to
+say.  There was a big portly landlord, whom I daresay you have seen; a
+noisy savage Radical, who wanted at first to fasten upon me a quarrel
+about America, but who subsequently drew in his horns; then there was a
+strange fellow, a prowling priest, I believe, whom I have frequently
+heard of, who at first seemed disposed to side with the Radical against
+me, and afterwards with me against the Radical.  There, you know my
+company, and what took place.'
+
+'Was there no one else?' said Belle.
+
+'You are mighty curious,' said I.  'No, none else, except a poor simple
+mechanic, and some common company, who soon went away.'
+
+Belle looked at me for a moment, and then appeared to be lost in
+thought--'America!' said she, musingly--'America!'
+
+'What of America?' said I.
+
+'I have heard that it is a mighty country.'
+
+'I daresay it is,' said I; 'I have heard my father say that the Americans
+are first-rate marksmen.'
+
+'I heard nothing about that,' said Belle; 'what I heard was, that it is a
+great and goodly land, where people can walk about without jostling, and
+where the industrious can always find bread; I have frequently thought of
+going thither.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'the Radical in the public-house will perhaps be glad of
+your company thither; he is as great an admirer of America as yourself,
+though I believe on different grounds.'
+
+'I shall go by myself,' said Belle, 'unless--unless that should happen
+which is not likely--I am not fond of Radicals no more than I am of
+scoffers and mockers.'
+
+'Do you mean to say that I am a scoffer and mocker?'
+
+'I don't wish to say you are,' said Belle; 'but some of your words sound
+strangely like scoffing and mocking.  I have now one thing to beg, which
+is, that if you have anything to say against America, you would speak it
+out boldly.'
+
+'What should I have to say against America?  I never was there.'
+
+'Many people speak against America who never were there.'
+
+'Many people speak in praise of America who never were there; but with
+respect to myself, I have not spoken for or against America.'
+
+'If you liked America you would speak in its praise.'
+
+'By the same rule, if I disliked America I should speak against it.'
+
+'I can't speak with you,' said Belle; 'but I see you dislike the
+country.'
+
+'The country!'
+
+'Well, the people--don't you?'
+
+'I do.'
+
+'Why do you dislike them?'
+
+'Why, I have heard my father say that the American marksmen, led on by a
+chap of the name of Washington, sent the English to the right-about in
+double-quick time.'
+
+'And that is your reason for disliking the Americans?'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'that is my reason for disliking them.'
+
+'Will you take another cup of tea?' said Belle.
+
+I took another cup; we were again silent.  'It is rather uncomfortable,'
+said I, at last, 'for people to sit together without having anything to
+say.'
+
+'Were you thinking of your company?' said Belle.
+
+'What company?' said I.
+
+'The present company.'
+
+'The present company! oh, ah--I remember that I said one only feels
+uncomfortable in being silent with a companion, when one happens to be
+thinking of the companion.  Well, I had been thinking of you the last two
+or three minutes, and had just come to the conclusion that, to prevent us
+both feeling occasionally uncomfortably towards each other, having
+nothing to say, it would be as well to have a standing subject on which
+to employ our tongues.  Belle, I have determined to give you lessons in
+Armenian.'
+
+'What is Armenian?'
+
+'Did you ever hear of Ararat?'
+
+'Yes, that was the place where the ark rested; I have heard the chaplain
+in the great house talk of it; besides, I have read of it in the Bible.'
+
+'Well, Armenian is the speech of people of that place, and I should like
+to teach it you.'
+
+'To prevent--'
+
+'Ay, ay, to prevent our occasionally feeling uncomfortable together.  Your
+acquiring it besides might prove of ulterior advantage to us both; for
+example, suppose you and I were in promiscuous company, at Court, for
+example, and you had something to communicate to me which you did not
+wish any one else to be acquainted with, how safely you might communicate
+it to me in Armenian.'
+
+'Would not the language of the roads do as well?' said Belle.
+
+'In some places it would,' said I, 'but not at Court, owing to its
+resemblance to thieves' slang.  There is Hebrew, again, which I was
+thinking of teaching you, till the idea of being presented at Court made
+me abandon it, from the probability of our being understood, in the event
+of our speaking it, by at least half a dozen people in our vicinity.
+There is Latin, it is true, or Greek, which we might speak aloud at Court
+with perfect confidence of safety, but upon the whole I should prefer
+teaching you Armenian, not because it would be a safer language to hold
+communication with at Court, but because, not being very well grounded in
+it myself, I am apprehensive that its words and forms may escape from my
+recollection, unless I have sometimes occasion to call them forth.'
+
+'I am afraid we shall have to part company before I have learnt it,' said
+Belle; 'in the meantime, if I wish to say anything to you in private,
+somebody being by, shall I speak in the language of the roads?'
+
+'If no roadster is nigh you may,' said I, 'and I will do my best to
+understand you.  Belle, I will now give you a lesson in Armenian.'
+
+'I suppose you mean no harm,' said Belle.
+
+'Not in the least; I merely propose the thing to prevent our occasionally
+feeling uncomfortable together.  Let us begin.'
+
+'Stop till I have removed the tea things,' said Belle; and, getting up,
+she removed them to her own encampment.
+
+'I am ready,' said Belle, returning, and taking her former seat, 'to join
+with you in anything which will serve to pass away the time agreeably,
+provided there is no harm in it.'
+
+'Belle,' said I, 'I have determined to commence the course of Armenian
+lessons by teaching you the numerals; but, before I do that, it will be
+as well to tell you that the Armenian language is called Haik.'
+
+'I am sure that word will hang upon my memory,' said Belle.
+
+'Why hang upon it?' said I.
+
+'Because the old women in the great house used to call so the chimney-
+hook, on which they hung the kettle; in like manner, on the hake of my
+memory I will hang your hake.'
+
+'Good!' said I, 'you will make an apt scholar; but mind that I did not
+say hake, but haik; the words are, however, very much alike; and, as you
+observe, upon your hake you may hang my haik.  We will now proceed to the
+numerals.'
+
+'What are numerals?' said Belle.
+
+'Numbers.  I will say the Haikan numbers up to ten.  There--have you
+heard them?'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'Well, try and repeat them.'
+
+'I only remember number one,' said Belle, 'and that because it is me.'
+
+' I will repeat them again,' said I, 'and pay greater attention.  Now,
+try again.'
+
+'Me, jergo, earache.'
+
+'I neither said jergo nor earache.  I said yergou and yerek.  Belle, I am
+afraid I shall have some difficulty with you as a scholar.'
+
+Belle made no answer.  Her eyes were turned in the direction of the
+winding path which led from the bottom of the hollow, where we were
+seated, to the plain above.  'Gorgio shunella,' she said at length, in a
+low voice.
+
+'Pure Rommany,' said I; 'where?' I added, in a whisper.
+
+'Dovey odoi,' said Belle, nodding with her head towards the path.
+
+'I will soon see who it is,' said I; and starting up, I rushed towards
+the pathway, intending to lay violent hands on any one I might find
+lurking in its windings.  Before, however, I had reached its
+commencement, a man, somewhat above the middle height, advanced from it
+into the dingle, in whom I recognised the man in black whom I had seen in
+the public-house.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XC
+
+
+Buona sera--Rather apprehensive--The steep bank--Lovely
+virgin--Hospitality--Tory minister--Custom of the country--Sneering
+smile--Wandering Zigan--Gypsies' cloaks--Certain faculty--Acute
+answer--Various ways--Addio--Best Hollands.
+
+The man in black and myself stood opposite to each other for a minute or
+two in silence; I will not say that we confronted each other that time,
+for the man in black, after a furtive glance, did not look me in the
+face, but kept his eyes fixed apparently on the leaves of a bunch of
+ground-nuts which were growing at my feet.  At length, looking around the
+dingle, he exclaimed, 'Buona sera, I hope I don't intrude.'
+
+'You have as much right here,' said I, 'as I or my companion; but you had
+no right to stand listening to our conversation.'
+
+'I was not listening,' said the man, 'I was hesitating whether to advance
+or retire; and if I heard some of your conversation, the fault was not
+mine.'
+
+'I do not see why you should have hesitated if your intentions were
+good,' said I.
+
+'I think the kind of place in which I found myself might excuse some
+hesitation,' said the man in black, looking around; 'moreover, from what
+I had seen of your demeanour at the public-house, I was rather
+apprehensive that the reception I might experience at your hands might be
+more rough than agreeable.'
+
+'And what may have been your motive for coming to this place?' said I.
+
+'Per far visita a sua signoria, ecco il motivo.'
+
+'Why do you speak to me in that gibberish,' said I; 'do you think I
+understand it?'
+
+'It is not Armenian,' said the man in black; 'but it might serve, in a
+place like this, for the breathing of a little secret communication, were
+any common roadster near at hand.  It would not do at Court, it is true,
+being the language of singing women, and the like; but we are not at
+Court--when we are, I can perhaps summon up a little indifferent Latin,
+if I have anything private to communicate to the learned Professor.'
+
+And at the conclusion of this speech the man in black lifted up his head,
+and, for some moments, looked me in the face.  The muscles of his own
+seemed to be slightly convulsed, and his mouth opened in a singular
+manner
+
+'I see,' said I, 'that for some time you were standing near me and my
+companion, in the mean act of listening.'
+
+'Not at all,' said the man in black; 'I heard from the steep bank above,
+that to which I have now alluded, whilst I was puzzling myself to find
+the path which leads to your retreat.  I made, indeed, nearly the compass
+of the whole thicket before I found it.'
+
+'And how did you know that I was here?' I demanded.
+
+'The landlord of the public-house, with whom I had some conversation
+concerning you, informed me that he had no doubt I should find you in
+this place, to which he gave me instructions not very clear.  But, now I
+am here, I crave permission to remain a little time, in order that I may
+hold some communion with you.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'since you are come, you are welcome; please to step this
+way.'
+
+Thereupon I conducted the man in black to the fireplace, where Belle was
+standing, who had risen from her stool on my springing up to go in quest
+of the stranger.  The man in black looked at her with evident curiosity,
+then making her rather a graceful bow, 'Lovely virgin,' said he,
+stretching out his hand, 'allow me to salute your fingers.'
+
+'I am not in the habit of shaking hands with strangers,' said Belle.
+
+'I did not presume to request to shake hands with you,' said the man in
+black, 'I merely wished to be permitted to salute with my lips the
+extremity of your two forefingers.'
+
+'I never permit anything of the kind,' said Belle; ' I do not approve of
+such unmanly ways, they are only befitting those who lurk in corners or
+behind trees, listening to the conversation of people who would fain be
+private.'
+
+'Do you take me for a listener then?' said the man in black.
+
+'Ay, indeed I do,' said Belle; 'the young man may receive your excuses,
+and put confidence in them, if he please, but for my part I neither admit
+them nor believe them;' and thereupon flinging her long hair back, which
+was hanging over her cheeks, she seated herself on her stool.
+
+'Come, Belle,' said I, 'I have bidden the gentleman welcome, I beseech
+you, therefore, to make him welcome; he is a stranger, where we are at
+home, therefore, even did we wish him away, we are bound to treat him
+kindly.'
+
+'That's not English doctrine,' said the man in black.
+
+'I thought the English prided themselves on their hospitality,' said I.
+
+'They do so,' said the man in black; 'they are proud of showing
+hospitality to people above them, that is, to those who do not want it,
+but of the hospitality which you were now describing, and which is
+Arabian, they know nothing.  No Englishman will tolerate another in his
+house, from whom he does not expect advantage of some kind, and to those
+from whom he does he can be civil enough.  An Englishman thinks that,
+because he is in his own house, he has a right to be boorish and brutal
+to any one who is disagreeable to him, as all those are who are really in
+want of assistance.  Should a hunted fugitive rush into an Englishman's
+house, beseeching protection, and appealing to the master's feelings of
+hospitality, the Englishman would knock him down in the passage.'
+
+'You are too general,' said I, 'in your strictures.  Lord ---, the
+unpopular Tory minister, was once chased through the streets of London by
+a mob, and, being in danger of his life, took shelter in the shop of a
+Whig linen-draper, declaring his own unpopular name, and appealing to the
+linen-draper's feelings of hospitality; whereupon the linen-draper,
+utterly forgetful of all party rancour, nobly responded to the appeal,
+and telling his wife to conduct his lordship upstairs, jumped over the
+counter, with his ell in his hand, and placing himself with half-a-dozen
+of his assistants at the door of his boutique, manfully confronted the
+mob, telling them that he would allow himself to be torn to a thousand
+pieces ere he would permit them to injure a hair of his lordship's head:
+what do you think of that?'
+
+'He! he! he!' tittered the man in black.
+
+'Well,' said I, 'I am afraid your own practice is not very different from
+that which you have been just now describing; you sided with the Radical
+in the public-house against me, as long as you thought him the most
+powerful, and then turned against him when you saw he was cowed.  What
+have you to say to that?'
+
+'Oh, when one is in Rome, I mean England, one must do as they do in
+England; I was merely conforming to the custom of the country, he! he!
+but I beg your pardon here, as I did in the public-house.  I made a
+mistake.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'we will drop the matter, but pray seat yourself on that
+stone, and I will sit down on the grass near you.'
+
+The man in black, after proffering two or three excuses for occupying
+what he supposed to be my seat, sat down upon the stone, and I squatted
+down, gypsy-fashion, just opposite to him, Belle sitting on her stool at
+a slight distance on my right.  After a time I addressed him thus: 'Am I
+to reckon this a mere visit of ceremony? should it prove so, it will be,
+I believe, the first visit of the kind ever paid me.'
+
+'Will you permit me to ask,' said the man in black--'the weather is very
+warm,' said he, interrupting himself, and taking off his hat.
+
+I now observed that he was partly bald, his red hair having died away
+from the fore part of his crown--his forehead was high, his eyebrows
+scanty, his eyes gray and sly, with a downward tendency, his nose was
+slightly aquiline, his mouth rather large--a kind of sneering smile
+played continually on his lips, his complexion was somewhat rubicund.
+
+'A bad countenance,' said Belle, in the language of the roads, observing
+that my eyes were fixed on his face.
+
+'Does not my countenance please you, fair damsel?' said the man in black,
+resuming his hat, and speaking in a peculiarly gentle voice.
+
+'How,' said I, 'do you understand the language of the roads?'
+
+'As little as I do Armenian,' said the man in black; 'but I understand
+look and tone.'
+
+'So do I, perhaps,' retorted Belle; 'and, to tell you the truth, I like
+your tone as little as your face.'
+
+'For shame,' said I; 'have you forgot what I was saying just now about
+the duties of hospitality?  You have not yet answered my question,' said
+I, addressing myself to the man, 'with respect to your visit.'
+
+'Will you permit me to ask who you are?'
+
+'Do you see the place where I live?' said I.
+
+'I do,' said the man in black, looking around.
+
+'Do you know the name of this place?'
+
+'I was told it was Mumpers' or Gypsies' Dingle,' said the man in black.
+
+'Good,' said I; 'and this forge and tent, what do they look like?'
+
+'Like the forge and tent of a wandering Zigan; I have seen the like in
+Italy.'
+
+'Good,' said I; 'they belong to me.'
+
+'Are you, then, a gypsy?' said the man in black.
+
+'What else should I be?'
+
+'But you seem to have been acquainted with various individuals with whom
+I have likewise had acquaintance; and you have even alluded to matters,
+and even words, which have passed between me and them.'
+
+'Do you know how gypsies live?' said I.
+
+'By hammering old iron, I believe, and telling fortunes.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'there's my forge, and yonder is some iron, though not
+old, and by your own confession I am a soothsayer.'
+
+'But how did you come by your knowledge?'
+
+'Oh,' said I, 'if you want me to reveal the secrets of my trade, I have,
+of course, nothing further to say.  Go to the scarlet dyer, and ask him
+how he dyes cloth.'
+
+'Why scarlet?' said the man in black.  'Is it because gypsies blush like
+scarlet?'
+
+'Gypsies never blush,' said I; 'but gypsies' cloaks are scarlet.'
+
+'I should almost take you for a gypsy,' said the man in black, 'but for--'
+
+'For what?' said I.
+
+'But for that same lesson in Armenian, and your general knowledge of
+languages; as for your manners and appearance I will say nothing,' said
+the man in black, with a titter.
+
+'And why should not a gypsy possess a knowledge of languages?' said I.
+
+'Because the gypsy race is perfectly illiterate,' said the man in black;
+'they are possessed, it is true, of a knavish acuteness, and are
+particularly noted for giving subtle and evasive answers--and in your
+answers, I confess, you remind me of them; but that one of the race
+should acquire a learned language like the Armenian, and have a general
+knowledge of literature, is a thing che io non credo afatto.'
+
+'What do you take me for?' said I.
+
+'Why,' said the man in black, 'I should consider you to be a philologist,
+who, for some purpose, has taken up a gypsy life; but I confess to you
+that your way of answering questions is far too acute for a philologist.'
+
+'And why should not a philologist be able to answer questions acutely?'
+said I.
+
+'Because the philological race is the most stupid under heaven,' said the
+man in black; 'they are possessed, it is true, of a certain faculty for
+picking up words, and a memory for retaining them; but that any one of
+the sect should be able to give a rational answer, to say nothing of an
+acute one, on any subject--even though the subject were philology--is a
+thing of which I have no idea.'
+
+'But you found me giving a lesson in Armenian to this handmaid?'
+
+'I believe I did,' said the man in black.
+
+'And you heard me give what you are disposed to call acute answers to the
+questions you asked me?'
+
+'I believe I did,' said the man in black.
+
+'And would any one but a philologist think of giving a lesson in Armenian
+to a handmaid in a dingle?
+
+'I should think not,' said the man in black.
+
+'Well, then, don't you see that it is possible for a philologist to give
+not only a rational, but an acute answer?'
+
+'I really don't know,' said the man in black.
+
+'What's the matter with you?' said I.
+
+'Merely puzzled,' said the man in black.
+
+'Puzzled?
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'Really puzzled?'
+
+'Yes.'
+
+'Remain so.'
+
+'Well,' said the man in black, rising, 'puzzled or not, I will no longer
+trespass upon your and this young lady's retirement; only allow me,
+before I go, to apologise for my intrusion.'
+
+'No apology is necessary,' said I; 'will you please to take anything
+before you go?  I think this young lady, at my request, would contrive to
+make you a cup of tea.'
+
+'Tea!' said the man in black; 'he! he!  I don't drink tea; I don't like
+it--if, indeed, you had,' and here he stopped.
+
+'There's nothing like gin and water, is there?' said I, 'but I am sorry
+to say I have none.'
+
+'Gin and water,' said the man in black, 'how do you know that I am fond
+of gin and water?'
+
+'Did I not see you drinking some at the public-house?'
+
+'You did,' said the man in black, 'and I remember that, when I called for
+some you repeated my words--permit me to ask, is gin and water an unusual
+drink in England?'
+
+'It is not usually drunk cold, and with a lump of sugar,' said I.
+
+'And did you know who I was by my calling for it so?'
+
+'Gypsies have various ways of obtaining information,' said I.
+
+'With all your knowledge,' said the man in black, 'you do not appear to
+have known that I was coming to visit you?'
+
+'Gypsies do not pretend to know anything which relates to themselves,'
+said I; 'but I advise you, if you ever come again, to come openly.'
+
+'Have I your permission to come again?' said the man in black.
+
+'Come when you please; this dingle is as free for you as me.'
+
+'I will visit you again,' said the man in black--'till then, addio.'
+
+'Belle,' said I, after the man in black had departed, 'we did not treat
+that man very hospitably; he left us without having eaten or drunk at our
+expense.'
+
+'You offered him some tea,' said Belle, 'which, as it is mine, I should
+have grudged him, for I like him not.'
+
+'Our liking or disliking him had nothing to do with the matter, he was
+our visitor, and ought not to have been permitted to depart dry; living
+as we do in this desert, we ought always to be prepared to administer to
+the wants of our visitors.  Belle, do you know where to procure any good
+Hollands?'
+
+'I think I do,' said Belle, 'but--'
+
+'I will have no buts.  Belle, I expect that with as little delay as
+possible you procure, at my expense, the best Hollands you can find.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCI
+
+
+Excursions--Adventurous English--Opaque forests--The greatest patience.
+
+Time passed on, and Belle and I lived in the dingle; when I say lived,
+the reader must not imagine that we were always there.  She went out upon
+her pursuits, and I went out where inclination led me; but my excursions
+were very short ones, and hers occasionally occupied whole days and
+nights.  If I am asked how we passed the time when we were together in
+the dingle, I would answer that we passed the time very tolerably, all
+things considered; we conversed together, and when tired of conversing I
+would sometimes give Belle a lesson in Armenian; her progress was not
+particularly brilliant, but upon the whole satisfactory; in about a
+fortnight she had hung up one hundred Haikan numerals upon the hake of
+her memory.  I found her conversation highly entertaining; she had seen
+much of England and Wales, and had been acquainted with some of the most
+remarkable characters who travelled the roads at that period; and let me
+be permitted to say that many remarkable characters have travelled the
+roads of England, of whom fame has never said a word.  I loved to hear
+her anecdotes of these people; some of whom I found had occasionally
+attempted to lay violent hands either upon her person or effects, and had
+invariably been humbled by her without the assistance of either justice
+or constable.  I could clearly see, however, that she was rather tired of
+England, and wished for a change of scene; she was particularly fond of
+talking of America, to which country her aspirations chiefly tended.  She
+had heard much of America, which had excited her imagination; for at that
+time America was much talked of, on roads and in homesteads--at least, so
+said Belle, who had good opportunities of knowing--and most people
+allowed that it was a good country for adventurous English.  The people
+who chiefly spoke against it, as she informed me, were soldiers disbanded
+upon pensions, the sextons of village churches, and excisemen.  Belle had
+a craving desire to visit that country, and to wander with cart and
+little animal amongst its forests; when I would occasionally object that
+she would be exposed to danger from strange and perverse customers, she
+said that she had not wandered the roads of England so long and alone, to
+be afraid of anything which might befall in America; and that she hoped,
+with God's favour, to be able to take her own part, and to give to
+perverse customers as good as they might bring.  She had a dauntless
+heart, that same Belle.  Such was the staple of Belle's conversation.  As
+for mine, I would endeavour to entertain her with strange dreams of
+adventure, in which I figured in opaque forests, strangling wild beasts,
+or discovering and plundering the hoards of dragons; and sometimes I
+would narrate to her other things far more genuine--how I had tamed
+savage mares, wrestled with Satan, and had dealings with ferocious
+publishers.  Belle had a kind heart, and would weep at the accounts I
+gave her of my early wrestlings with the dark Monarch.  She would sigh,
+too, as I recounted the many slights and degradations I had received at
+the hands of ferocious publishers; but she had the curiosity of a woman;
+and once, when I talked to her of the triumphs which I had achieved over
+unbroken mares, she lifted up her head and questioned me as to the secret
+of the virtue which I possessed over the aforesaid animals; whereupon I
+sternly reprimanded, and forthwith commanded her to repeat the Armenian
+numerals; and, on her demurring, I made use of words, to escape which she
+was glad to comply, saying the Armenian numerals from one to a hundred,
+which numerals, as a punishment for her curiosity, I made her repeat
+three times, loading her with the bitterest reproaches whenever she
+committed the slightest error, either in accent or pronunciation, which
+reproaches she appeared to bear with the greatest patience.  And now I
+have given a very fair account of the manner in which Isopel Berners and
+myself passed our time in the dingle.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCII
+
+
+The landlord--Rather too old--Without a shilling--Reputation--A fortnight
+ago--Liquids--The main chance--Respectability--Irrational
+beings--Parliament cove--My brewer.
+
+Amongst other excursions, I went several times to the public-house to
+which I introduced the reader in a former chapter.  I had experienced
+such beneficial effects from the ale I had drunk on that occasion, that I
+wished to put its virtue to a frequent test; nor did the ale on
+subsequent trials belie the good opinion which I had at first formed of
+it.  After each visit which I made to the public-house, I found my frame
+stronger and my mind more cheerful than they had previously been.  The
+landlord appeared at all times glad to see me, and insisted that I should
+sit within the bar, where, leaving his other guests to be attended to by
+a niece of his, who officiated as his housekeeper, he would sit beside me
+and talk of matters concerning 'the ring,' indulging himself with a cigar
+and a glass of sherry, which he told me was his favourite wine, whilst I
+drank my ale.  'I loves the conversation of all you coves of the ring,'
+said he once, 'which is natural, seeing as how I have fought in a ring
+myself.  Ah, there is nothing like the ring; I wish I was not rather too
+old to go again into it.  I often think I should like to have another
+rally--one more rally, and then--but there's a time for all things--youth
+will be served, every dog has his day, and mine has been a fine one--let
+me be content.  After beating Tom of Hopton, there was not much more to
+be done in the way of reputation; I have long sat in my bar the wonder
+and glory of this here neighbourhood.  I'm content, as far as reputation
+goes; I only wish money would come in a little faster; however, the next
+main of cocks will bring me in something handsome--comes off next
+Wednesday, at ---; have ventured ten five-pound notes--shouldn't say
+ventured either--run no risk at all, because why?  I knows my birds.'
+About ten days after this harangue I called again, at about three o'clock
+one afternoon.  The landlord was seated on a bench by a table in the
+common room, which was entirely empty; he was neither smoking nor
+drinking, but sat with his arms folded, and his head hanging down over
+his breast.  At the sound of my step he looked up; 'Ah,' said he, 'I am
+glad you are come, I was just thinking about you.'  'Thank you,' said I;
+'it was very kind of you, especially at a time like this, when your mind
+must be full of your good fortune.  Allow me to congratulate you on the
+sums of money you won by the main of cocks at ---.  I hope you brought it
+all safe home.'  'Safe home!' said the landlord; 'I brought myself safe
+home, and that was all; came home without a shilling, regularly done,
+cleaned out.'  'I am sorry for that,' said I; 'but after you had won the
+money, you ought to have been satisfied, and not risked it again--how did
+you lose it?  I hope not by the pea and thimble.'  'Pea and thimble,'
+said the landlord--'not I; those confounded cocks left me nothing to lose
+by the pea and thimble.'  'Dear me,' said I; 'I thought that you knew
+your birds.'  'Well, so I did,' said the landlord; 'I knew the birds to
+be good birds, and so they proved, and would have won if better birds had
+not been brought against them, of which I knew nothing, and so do you see
+I am done, regularly done.'  'Well,' said I, 'don't be cast down; there
+is one thing of which the cocks by their misfortune cannot deprive
+you--your reputation; make the most of that, give up cock-fighting, and
+be content with the custom of your house, of which you will always have
+plenty, as long as you are the wonder and glory of the neighbourhood.'
+
+The landlord struck the table before him violently with his fist.
+'Confound my reputation!' said he.  'No reputation that I have will be
+satisfaction to my brewer for the seventy pounds I owe him.  Reputation
+won't pass for the current coin of this here realm; and let me tell you,
+that if it ain't backed by some of it, it ain't a bit better than rotten
+cabbage, as I have found.  Only three weeks since I was, as I told you,
+the wonder and glory of the neighbourhood; and people used to come to
+look at me, and worship me; but as soon as it began to be whispered about
+that I owed money to the brewer, they presently left off all that kind of
+thing; and now, during the last three days, since the tale of my
+misfortune with the cocks has got wind, almost everybody has left off
+coming to the house, and the few who does, merely comes to insult and
+flout me.  It was only last night that fellow, Hunter, called me an old
+fool in my own kitchen here.  He wouldn't have called me a fool a
+fortnight ago; 'twas I called him fool then, and last night he called me
+old fool; what do you think of that?--the man that beat Tom of Hopton, to
+be called, not only a fool, but an old fool; and I hadn't heart, with one
+blow of this here fist into his face, to send his head ringing against
+the wall; for when a man's pocket is low, do you see, his heart ain't
+much higher; but it is of no use talking, something must be done.  I was
+thinking of you just as you came in, for you are just the person that can
+help me.'
+
+'If you mean,' said I, 'to ask me to lend you the money which you want,
+it will be to no purpose, as I have very little of my own, just enough
+for my own occasions; it is true, if you desired it, I would be your
+intercessor with the person to whom you owe the money, though I should
+hardly imagine that anything I could say--'  'You are right there,' said
+the landlord; 'much the brewer would care for anything you could say on
+my behalf--your going would be the very way to do me up entirely.  A
+pretty opinion he would have of the state of my affairs if I were to send
+him such a 'cessor as you; and as for your lending me money, don't think
+I was ever fool enough to suppose either that you had any, or if you had
+that you would be fool enough to lend me any.  No, no, the coves of the
+ring knows better; I have been in the ring myself, and knows what a
+fighting cove is, and though I was fool enough to back those birds, I was
+never quite fool enough to lend anybody money.  What I am about to
+propose is something very different from going to my landlord, or lending
+any capital; something which, though it will put money into my pocket,
+will likewise put something handsome into your own.  I want to get up a
+fight in this here neighbourhood, which would be sure to bring plenty of
+people to my house, for a week before and after it takes place; and as
+people can't come without drinking, I think I could, during one
+fortnight, get off for the brewer all the sour and unsaleable liquids he
+now has, which people wouldn't drink at any other time, and by that
+means, do you see, liquidate my debt; then, by means of betting, making
+first all right, do you see, I have no doubt that I could put something
+handsome into my pocket and yours, for I should wish you to be the
+fighting man, as I think I can depend upon you.'  'You really must excuse
+me,' said I; 'I have no wish to figure as a pugilist; besides, there is
+such a difference in our ages; you may be the stronger man of the two,
+and perhaps the hardest hitter, but I am in much better condition, am
+more active on my legs, so that I am almost sure I should have the
+advantage, for, as you very properly observed, "Youth will be served."'
+'Oh, I didn't mean to fight,' said the landlord; 'I think I could beat
+you if I were to train a little; but in the fight I propose I looks more
+to the main chance than anything else.  I question whether half so many
+people could be brought together if you were to fight with me as the
+person I have in view, or whether there would be half such opportunities
+for betting, for I am a man, do you see; the person I wants you to fight
+with is not a man, but the young woman you keeps company with.'
+
+'The young woman I keep company with,' said I; 'pray what do you mean?'
+
+'We will go into the bar, and have something,' said the landlord, getting
+up.  'My niece is out, and there is no one in the house, so we can talk
+the matter over quietly.'  Thereupon I followed him into the bar, where,
+having drawn me a jug of ale, helped himself as usual to a glass of
+sherry, and lighted a cigar, he proceeded to explain himself further.
+'What I wants is to get up a fight between a man and a woman; there never
+has yet been such a thing in the ring, and the mere noise of the matter
+would bring thousands of people together, quite enough to drink out, for
+the thing should be close to my house, all the brewer's stock of liquids,
+both good and bad.'  'But,' said I, 'you were the other day boasting of
+the respectability of your house; do you think that a fight between a man
+and a woman close to your establishment would add to its respectability?'
+'Confound the respectability of my house,' said the landlord; 'will the
+respectability of my house pay the brewer, or keep the roof over my head?
+No, no! when respectability won't keep a man, do you see, the best thing
+is to let it go and wander.  Only let me have my own way, and both the
+brewer, myself, and every one of us, will be satisfied.  And then the
+betting--what a deal we may make by the betting--and that we shall have
+all to ourselves, you, I, and the young woman; the brewer will have no
+hand in that.  I can manage to raise ten pounds, and if by flashing that
+about I don't manage to make a hundred, call me horse.'  'But suppose,'
+said I, 'the party should lose, on whom you sport your money, even as the
+birds did?'  'We must first make all right,' said the landlord, 'as I
+told you before; the birds were irrational beings, and therefore couldn't
+come to an understanding with the others, as you and the young woman can.
+The birds fought fair; but I intend that you and the young woman should
+fight cross.'  'What do you mean by cross?' said I.  'Come, come,' said
+the landlord, 'don't attempt to gammon me; you in the ring, and pretend
+not to know what fighting cross is!  That won't do, my fine fellow; but
+as no one is near us, I will speak out.  I intend that you and the young
+woman should understand one another, and agree beforehand which should be
+beat; and if you take my advice, you will determine between you that the
+young woman shall be beat, as I am sure that the odds will run high upon
+her, her character as a fist-woman being spread far and wide, so that all
+the flats who think it will be all right will back her, as I myself
+would, if I thought it would be a fair thing.'  'Then,' said I, 'you
+would not have us fight fair?'  'By no means,' said the landlord,
+'because why?--I conceives that a cross is a certainty to those who are
+in it, whereas by the fair thing one may lose all he has.'  'But,' said
+I, 'you said the other day that you liked the fair thing.'  'That was by
+way of gammon,' said the landlord; 'just, do you see, as a Parliament
+cove might say, speechifying from a barrel to a set of flats, whom he
+means to sell.  Come, what do you think of the plan?'
+
+'It is a very ingenious one,' said I.
+
+'Ain't it?' said the landlord.  'The folks in this neighbourhood are
+beginning to call me old fool; but if they don't call me something else,
+when they sees me friends with the brewer, and money in my pocket, my
+name is not Catchpole.  Come, drink your ale, and go home to the young
+gentlewoman.'
+
+'I am going,' said I, rising from my seat, after finishing the remainder
+of the ale.
+
+'Do you think she'll have any objection?' said the landlord.
+
+'To do what?' said I.
+
+'Why, to fight cross.'
+
+'Yes, I do,' said I.
+
+'But you will do your best to persuade her?'
+
+'No, I will not,' said I.
+
+'Are you fool enough to wish to fight fair?'
+
+'No,' said I, 'I am wise enough to wish not to fight at all.'
+
+'And how's my brewer to be paid?' said the landlord.
+
+'I really don't know,' said I.
+
+'I'll change my religion,' said the landlord.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCIII
+
+
+Another visit--A la Margutte--Clever man--Napoleon's estimate--Another
+statue.
+
+One evening Belle and myself received another visit from the man in
+black.  After a little conversation of not much importance, I asked him
+whether he would not take some refreshment, assuring him that I was now
+in possession of some very excellent Hollands, which, with a glass, a jug
+of water, and a lump of sugar, was heartily at his service; he accepted
+my offer, and Belle going with a jug to the spring, from which she was in
+the habit of procuring water for tea, speedily returned with it full of
+the clear, delicious water of which I have already spoken.  Having placed
+the jug by the side of the man in black, she brought him a glass and
+spoon, and a tea-cup, the latter containing various lumps of snowy-white
+sugar: in the meantime I had produced a bottle of the stronger liquid.
+The man in black helped himself to some water, and likewise to some
+Hollands, the proportion of water being about two-thirds; then adding a
+lump of sugar, he stirred the whole up, tasted it, and said that it was
+good.
+
+'This is one of the good things of life,' he added, after a short pause.
+
+'What are the others?' I demanded.
+
+'There is Malvoisia sack,' said the man in black, 'and partridge, and
+beccafico.'
+
+'And what do you say to high mass?' said I.
+
+'High mass!' said the man in black; 'however,' he continued, after a
+pause, 'I will be frank with you; I came to be so; I may have heard high
+mass on a time, and said it too; but as for any predilection for it, I
+assure you I have no more than for a long High Church sermon.'
+
+'You speak a la Margutte,' said I.
+
+'Margutte!' said the man in black, musingly, 'Margutte!'
+
+'You have read Pulci, I suppose?' said I.
+
+'Yes, yes,' said the man in black, laughing; 'I remember.'
+
+'He might be rendered into English,' said I, 'something in this style:
+
+   'To which Margutte answered with a sneer,
+   I like the blue no better than the black,
+   My faith consists alone in savoury cheer,
+   In roasted capons, and in potent sack;
+   But above all, in famous gin and clear,
+   Which often lays the Briton on his back;
+   With lump of sugar, and with lymph from well,
+   I drink it, and defy the fiends of hell.'
+
+'He! he! he!' said the man in black; 'that is more than Mezzofante could
+have done for a stanza of Byron.'
+
+'A clever man,' said I.
+
+'Who?' said the man in black.
+
+'Mezzofante di Bologna.'
+
+'He! he! he!' said the man in black; 'now I know that you are not a
+gypsy, at least a soothsayer; no soothsayer would have said that--'
+
+'Why,' said I, 'does he not understand five-and-twenty tongues?'
+
+'Oh yes,' said the man in black; 'and five-and-twenty added to them; but,
+he! he! he! it was principally from him, who is certainly the greatest of
+Philologists, that I formed my opinion of the sect.'
+
+'You ought to speak of him with more respect,' said I; 'I have heard say
+that he has done good service to your See.'
+
+'Oh yes,' said the man in black; 'he has done good service to our See,
+that is, in his way; when the neophytes of the Propaganda are to be
+examined in the several tongues in which they are destined to preach, he
+is appointed to question them, the questions being first written down for
+him, or else, he! he! he!--Of course you know Napoleon's estimate of
+Mezzofante; he sent for the linguist from motives of curiosity, and after
+some discourse with him, told him that he might depart; then turning to
+some of his generals he observed, "Nous avons eu ici un exemple qu'un
+homme peut avoir beaucoup de paroles avec bien pen d'esprit."'
+
+'You are ungrateful to him,' said I; 'well, perhaps, when he is dead and
+gone you will do him justice.'
+
+'True,' said the man in black; 'when he is dead and gone, we intend to
+erect him a statue of wood, on the left-hand side of the door of the
+Vatican library.'
+
+'Of wood?' said I.
+
+'He was the son of a carpenter, you know,' said the man in black; 'the
+figure will be of wood for no other reason, I assure you; he! he!'
+
+'You should place another statue on the right.'
+
+'Perhaps we shall,' said the man in black; 'but we know of no one amongst
+the philologists of Italy, nor, indeed, of the other countries inhabited
+by the faithful, worthy to sit parallel in effigy with our illustrissimo;
+when, indeed, we have conquered these regions of the perfidious by
+bringing the inhabitants thereof to the true faith, I have no doubt that
+we shall be able to select one worthy to bear him company--one whose
+statue shall be placed on the right hand of the library, in testimony of
+our joy at his conversion; for, as you know, "There is more joy," etc.'
+
+'Wood?' said I.
+
+'I hope not,' said the man in black; 'no, if I be consulted as to the
+material for the statue, I should strongly recommend bronze.'
+
+And when the man in black had said this, he emptied his second tumbler of
+its contents, and prepared himself another.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCIV
+
+
+Prerogative--Feeling of gratitude--A long history--Alliterative
+style--Advantageous specimen--Jesuit benefice--Not sufficient--Queen
+Stork's tragedy--Good sense--Grandeur and gentility--Ironmonger's
+daughter--Clan Mac-Sycophant--Lickspittles--A curiosity--Newspaper
+editors--Charles the Simple--High-flying ditty--Dissenters--Lower
+classes--Priestley's house--Saxon ancestors--Austin--Renovating
+glass--Money--Quite original.
+
+'So you hope to bring these regions again beneath the banner of the Roman
+See?' said I, after the man in black had prepared the beverage, and
+tasted it.
+
+'Hope!' said the man in black; 'how can we fail?  Is not the Church of
+these regions going to lose its prerogative?'
+
+'Its prerogative?'
+
+'Yes; those who should be the guardians of the religion of England are
+about to grant Papists emancipation, and to remove the disabilities from
+Dissenters, which will allow the Holy Father to play his own game in
+England.'
+
+On my inquiring how the Holy Father intended to play his game, the man in
+black gave me to understand that he intended for the present to cover the
+land with temples, in which the religion of Protestants would be
+continually scoffed at and reviled.
+
+On my observing that such behaviour would savour strongly of ingratitude,
+the man in black gave me to understand that if I entertained the idea
+that the See of Rome was ever influenced in its actions by any feeling of
+gratitude I was much mistaken, assuring me that if the See of Rome in any
+encounter should chance to be disarmed, and its adversary, from a feeling
+of magnanimity, should restore the sword which had been knocked out of
+its hand, the See of Rome always endeavoured on the first opportunity to
+plunge the said sword into its adversary's bosom; conduct which the man
+in black seemed to think was very wise, and which he assured me had
+already enabled it to get rid of a great many troublesome adversaries,
+and would, he had no doubt, enable it to get rid of a great many more.
+
+On my attempting to argue against the propriety of such behaviour, the
+man in black cut the matter short by saying that if one party was a fool
+he saw no reason why the other should imitate it in its folly.
+
+After musing a little while, I told him that emancipation had not yet
+passed through the legislature, and that perhaps it never would;
+reminding him that there was often many a slip between the cup and the
+lip; to which observation the man in black agreed, assuring me, however,
+that there was no doubt that emancipation would be carried, inasmuch as
+there was a very loud cry at present in the land--a cry of 'tolerance,'
+which had almost frightened the Government out of its wits; who, to get
+rid of the cry, was going to grant all that was asked in the way of
+toleration, instead of telling the people to 'hold their nonsense,' and
+cutting them down provided they continued bawling longer.
+
+I questioned the man in black with respect to the origin of this cry; but
+he said, to trace it to its origin would require a long history; that, at
+any rate, such a cry was in existence, the chief raisers of it being
+certain of the nobility, called Whigs, who hoped by means of it to get
+into power, and to turn out certain ancient adversaries of theirs called
+Tories, who were for letting things remain _in statu quo_; that these
+Whigs were backed by a party amongst the people called Radicals, a
+specimen of whom I had seen in the public-house; a set of fellows who
+were always in the habit of bawling against those in place; 'and so,' he
+added, 'by means of these parties, and the hubbub which the Papists and
+other smaller sects are making, a general emancipation will be carried,
+and the Church of England humbled, which is the principal thing which the
+See of Rome cares for.'
+
+On my telling the man in black that I believed that, even among the high
+dignitaries of the English Church, there were many who wished to grant
+perfect freedom to religions of all descriptions, he said he was aware
+that such was the fact, and that such a wish was anything but wise,
+inasmuch as, if they had any regard for the religion they professed, they
+ought to stand by it through thick and thin, proclaiming it to be the
+only true one, and denouncing all others, in an alliterative style, as
+dangerous and damnable; whereas, by their present conduct, they were
+bringing their religion into contempt with the people at large, who would
+never continue long attached to a Church the ministers of which did not
+stand up for it, and likewise cause their own brethren, who had a clearer
+notion of things, to be ashamed of belonging to it.  'I speak advisedly,'
+said he, in continuation; 'there is one Platitude.'
+
+'And I hope there is only one,' said I; 'you surely would not adduce the
+likes and dislikes of that poor silly fellow as the criterions of the
+opinions of any party?'
+
+'You know him,' said the man in black, 'nay, I heard you mention him in
+the public-house; the fellow is not very wise, I admit, but he has sense
+enough to know that, unless a Church can make people hold their tongues
+when it thinks fit, it is scarcely deserving the name of a Church; no, I
+think that the fellow is not such a very bad stick, and that upon the
+whole he is, or rather was, an advantageous specimen of the High Church
+English clergy, who, for the most part, so far from troubling their heads
+about persecuting people, only think of securing their tithes, eating
+their heavy dinners, puffing out their cheeks with importance on country
+justice benches, and occasionally exhibiting their conceited wives,
+hoyden daughters, and gawky sons at country balls, whereas Platitude--'
+
+'Stop,' said I; 'you said in the public-house that the Church of England
+was a persecuting Church, and here in the dingle you have confessed that
+one section of it is willing to grant perfect freedom to the exercise of
+all religions, and the other only thinks of leading an easy life.'
+
+'Saying a thing in the public-house is a widely different thing from
+saying it in the dingle,' said the man in black; 'had the Church of
+England been a persecuting Church, it would not stand in the position in
+which it stands at present; it might, with its opportunities, have spread
+itself over the greater part of the world.  I was about to observe that,
+instead of practising the indolent habits of his High Church brethren,
+Platitude would be working for his money, preaching the proper use of
+fire and faggot, or rather of the halter and the whipping-post,
+encouraging mobs to attack the houses of Dissenters, employing spies to
+collect the scandal of neighbourhoods, in order that he might use it for
+sacerdotal purposes, and, in fact, endeavouring to turn an English parish
+into something like a Jesuit benefice in the south of France.'
+
+'He tried that game,' said I, 'and the parish said "Pooh, pooh," and, for
+the most part, went over to the Dissenters.'
+
+'Very true,' said the man in black, taking a sip at his glass, 'but why
+were the Dissenters allowed to preach? why were they not beaten on the
+lips till they spat out blood, with a dislodged tooth or two?  Why, but
+because the authority of the Church of England has, by its own fault,
+become so circumscribed that Mr. Platitude was not able to send a host of
+beadles and sbirri to their chapel to bring them to reason, on which
+account Mr. Platitude is very properly ashamed of his Church, and is
+thinking of uniting himself with one which possesses more vigour and
+authority.'
+
+'It may have vigour and authority,' said I, 'in foreign lands, but in
+these kingdoms the day for practising its atrocities is gone by.  It is
+at present almost below contempt, and is obliged to sue for grace _in
+forma pauperis_.'
+
+'Very true,' said the man in black; 'but let it once obtain emancipation,
+and it will cast its slough, put on its fine clothes, and make converts
+by thousands.  'What a fine Church!' they'll say; 'with what authority it
+speaks! no doubts, no hesitation, no sticking at trifles.  What a
+contrast to the sleepy English Church!  They'll go over to it by
+millions, till it preponderates here over every other, when it will of
+course be voted the dominant one; and then--and then--' and here the man
+in black drank a considerable quantity of gin and water.
+
+'What then?' said I.
+
+'What then?' said the man in black, 'why she will be true to herself.  Let
+Dissenters, whether they be Church of England, as perhaps they may still
+call themselves, Methodist, or Presbyterian, presume to grumble, and
+there shall be bruising of lips in pulpits, tying up to whipping-posts,
+cutting off ears and noses--he! he! the farce of King Log has been acted
+long enough; the time for Queen Stork's tragedy is drawing nigh'; and the
+man in black sipped his gin and water in a very exulting manner.
+
+'And this is the Church which, according to your assertion in the public-
+house, never persecutes?'
+
+'I have already given you an answer,' said the man in black.  'With
+respect to the matter of the public-house, it is one of the happy
+privileges of those who belong to my Church to deny in the public-house
+what they admit in the dingle; we have high warranty for such double
+speaking.  Did not the foundation stone of our Church, Saint Peter, deny
+in the public-house what he had previously professed in the valley?'
+
+'And do you think,' said I, 'that the people of England, who have shown
+aversion to anything in the shape of intolerance, will permit such
+barbarities as you have described?'
+
+'Let them become Papists,' said the man in black; 'only let the majority
+become Papists, and you will see.'
+
+'They will never become so,' said I; 'the good sense of the people of
+England will never permit them to commit such an absurdity.'
+
+'The good sense of the people of England!' said the man in black, filling
+himself another glass.
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'the good sense of not only the upper, but the middle and
+lower classes.'
+
+'And of what description of people are the upper class?' said the man in
+black, putting a lump of sugar into his gin and water.
+
+'Very fine people,' said I, 'monstrously fine people; so, at least, they
+are generally believed to be.'
+
+'He! he!' said the man in black; 'only those think them so who don't know
+them.  The male part of the upper class are in youth a set of heartless
+profligates; in old age, a parcel of poor, shaking, nervous paillards.
+The female part, worthy to be the sisters and wives of such
+wretches--unmarried, full of cold vice, kept under by vanity and
+ambition, but which, after marriage, they seek not to restrain; in old
+age, abandoned to vapours and horrors; do you think that such beings will
+afford any obstacle to the progress of the Church in these regions, as
+soon as her movements are unfettered?'
+
+'I cannot give an opinion; I know nothing of them, except from a
+distance.  But what think you of the middle classes?'
+
+'Their chief characteristic,' said the man in black, 'is a rage for
+grandeur and gentility; and that same rage makes us quite sure of them in
+the long run.  Everything that's lofty meets their unqualified
+approbation; whilst everything humble, or, as they call it, "low," is
+scouted by them.  They begin to have a vague idea that the religion which
+they have hitherto professed is low; at any rate, that it is not the
+religion of the mighty ones of the earth, of the great kings and emperors
+whose shoes they have a vast inclination to kiss, nor was used by the
+grand personages of whom they have read in their novels and romances,
+their Ivanhoes, their Marmions, and their Ladies of the Lake.'
+
+'Do you think that the writings of Scott have had any influence in
+modifying their religious opinions?'
+
+'Most certainly I do,' said the man in black.  'The writings of that man
+have made them greater fools than they were before.  All their
+conversation now is about gallant knights, princesses, and cavaliers,
+with which his pages are stuffed--all of whom were Papists, or very High
+Church, which is nearly the same thing; and they are beginning to think
+that the religion of such nice sweet-scented gentry must be something
+very superfine.  Why, I know at Birmingham the daughter of an ironmonger,
+who screeches to the piano the Lady of the Lake's hymn to the Virgin
+Mary, always weeps when Mary Queen of Scots is mentioned, and fasts on
+the anniversary of the death of that very wise martyr, Charles the First.
+Why, I would engage to convert such an idiot to popery in a week, were it
+worth my trouble.  O Cavaliere Gualtiero, avete fatto molto in favore
+della Santa Sede!'
+
+'If he has,' said I, 'he has done it unwittingly; I never heard before
+that he was a favourer of the popish delusion.'
+
+'Only in theory,' said the man in black.  'Trust any of the clan
+Mac-Sycophant for interfering openly and boldly in favour of any cause on
+which the sun does not shine benignantly.  Popery is at present, as you
+say, suing for grace in these regions _in forma pauperis_; but let
+royalty once take it up, let old gouty George once patronise it, and I
+would consent to drink puddle-water if, the very next time the canny Scot
+was admitted to the royal symposium, he did not say, "By my faith, yere
+Majesty, I have always thought, at the bottom of my heart, that popery,
+as ill-scrapit tongues ca' it, was a very grand religion; I shall be
+proud to follow your Majesty's example in adopting it."'
+
+'I doubt not,' said I, 'that both gouty George and his devoted servant
+will be mouldering in their tombs long before Royalty in England thinks
+about adopting popery.'
+
+'We can wait,' said the man in black; 'in these days of rampant
+gentility, there will be no want of kings nor of Scots about them.'
+
+'But not Walters,' said I.
+
+'Our work has been already tolerably well done by one,' said the man in
+black; 'but if we wanted literature, we should never lack in these
+regions hosts of literary men of some kind or other to eulogise us,
+provided our religion were in the fashion, and our popish nobles
+chose--and they always do our bidding--to admit the canaille to their
+tables--their kitchen tables.  As for literature in general,' said he,
+'the Santa Sede is not particularly partial to it, it may be employed
+both ways.  In Italy, in particular, it has discovered that literary men
+are not always disposed to be lickspittles.'
+
+'For example, Dante,' said I.
+
+'Yes,' said the man in black, 'a dangerous personage; that poem of his
+cuts both ways; and then there was Pulci, that _Morgante_ of his cuts
+both ways, or rather one way, and that sheer against us; and then there
+was Aretino, who dealt so hard with the _poveri frati_; all writers, at
+least Italian ones, are not lickspittles.  And then in Spain,--'tis true,
+Lope de Vega and Calderon were most inordinate lickspittles; the
+_Principe Constante_ of the last is a curiosity in its way; and then the
+_Mary Stuart_ of Lope; I think I shall recommend the perusal of that work
+to the Birmingham ironmonger's daughter--she has been lately thinking of
+adding "a slight knowledge of the magneeficent language of the Peninsula"
+to the rest of her accomplishments, he! he! he!  But then there was
+Cervantes, starving, but straight; he deals us some hard knocks in that
+second part of his _Quixote_.  Then there were some of the writers of the
+picaresque novels.  No, all literary men are not lickspittles, whether in
+Italy or Spain, or, indeed, upon the Continent; it is only in England
+that all--'
+
+'Come,' said I, 'Mind what you are about to say of English literary men.'
+
+'Why should I mind?' said the man in black, 'there are no literary men
+here.  I have heard of literary men living in garrets, but not in
+dingles, whatever philologists may do; I may, therefore, speak out
+freely.  It is only in England that literary men are invariably
+lickspittles; on which account, perhaps, they are so despised, even by
+those who benefit by their dirty services.  Look at your fashionable
+novel-writers, he! he!--and, above all, at your newspaper editors, ho!
+ho!'
+
+'You will, of course, except the editors of the--from your censure of the
+last class?' said I.
+
+'Them!' said the man in black; 'why, they might serve as models in the
+dirty trade to all the rest who practise it.  See how they bepraise their
+patrons, the grand Whig nobility, who hope, by raising the cry of
+liberalism and by putting themselves at the head of the populace, to come
+into power shortly.  I don't wish to be hard, at present, upon those
+Whigs,' he continued, 'for they are playing our game; but a time will
+come when, not wanting them, we will kick them to a considerable
+distance: and then, when toleration is no longer the cry, and the Whigs
+are no longer backed by the populace, see whether the editors of the--will
+stand by them; they will prove themselves as expert lickspittles of
+despotism as of liberalism.  Don't think they will always bespatter the
+Tories and Austria.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'I am sorry to find that you entertain so low an opinion
+of the spirit of English literary men; we will now return, if you please,
+to the subject of the middle classes; I think your strictures upon them
+in general are rather too sweeping--they are not altogether the foolish
+people which you have described.  Look, for example, at that very
+powerful and numerous body the Dissenters, the descendants of those
+sturdy Patriots who hurled Charles the Simple from his throne.'
+
+'There are some sturdy fellows amongst them, I do not deny,' said the man
+in black, 'especially amongst the preachers, clever withal--two or three
+of that class nearly drove Mr. Platitude mad, as perhaps you are aware,
+but they are not very numerous; and the old sturdy sort of preachers are
+fast dropping off, and, as we observe with pleasure, are generally
+succeeded by frothy coxcombs, whom it would not be very difficult to gain
+over.  But what we most rely upon as an instrument to bring the
+Dissenters over to us is the mania for gentility, which amongst them has
+of late become as great, and more ridiculous than amongst the middle
+classes belonging to the Church of England.  All the plain and simple
+fashions of their forefathers they are either about to abandon, or have
+already done so.  Look at the most part of their chapels--no longer
+modest brick edifices, situated in quiet and retired streets, but lunatic-
+looking erections, in what the simpletons call the modern Gothic taste,
+of Portland stone, with a cross upon the top, and the site generally the
+most conspicuous that can be found.  And look at the manner in which they
+educate their children--I mean those that are wealthy.  They do not even
+wish them to be Dissenters--"the sweet dears shall enjoy the advantages
+of good society, of which their parents were debarred."  So the girls are
+sent to tip-top boarding-schools, where amongst other trash they read
+_Rokeby_, and are taught to sing snatches from that high-flying ditty,
+the "Cavalier"--
+
+   'Would you match the base Skippon, and Massey, and Brown,
+   With the barons of England, who fight for the crown?--
+
+he! he! their own names.  Whilst the lads are sent to those hotbeds of
+pride and folly--colleges, whence they return with a greater contempt for
+everything "low," and especially for their own pedigree, than they went
+with.  I tell you, friend, the children of Dissenters, if not their
+parents, are going over to the Church, as you call it, and the Church is
+going over to Rome.'
+
+'I do not see the justice of that latter assertion at all,' said I; 'some
+of the Dissenters' children may be coming over to the Church of England,
+and yet the Church of England be very far from going over to Rome.'
+
+'In the high road for it, I assure you,' said the man in black; 'part of
+it is going to abandon, the rest to lose their prerogative, and when a
+Church no longer retains its prerogative, it speedily loses its own
+respect, and that of others.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'if the higher classes have all the vices and follies
+which you represent, on which point I can say nothing, as I have never
+mixed with them; and even supposing the middle classes are the foolish
+beings you would fain make them, and which I do not believe them as a
+body to be, you would still find some resistance amongst the lower
+classes: I have a considerable respect for their good sense and
+independence of character; but pray let me hear your opinion of them.'
+
+'As for the lower classes,' said the man in black, 'I believe them to be
+the most brutal wretches in the world, the most addicted to foul feeding,
+foul language, and foul vices of every kind; wretches who have neither
+love for country, religion, nor anything save their own vile selves.  You
+surely do not think that they would oppose a change of religion! why,
+there is not one of them but would hurrah for the Pope, or Mahomet, for
+the sake of a hearty gorge and a drunken bout, like those which they are
+treated with at election contests.'
+
+'Has your church any followers amongst them?' said I.
+
+'Wherever there happens to be a Romish family of considerable
+possessions,' said the man in black, 'our church is sure to have
+followers of the lower class, who have come over in the hope of getting
+something in the shape of dole or donation.  As, however, the Romish is
+not yet the dominant religion, and the clergy of the English
+establishment have some patronage to bestow, the churches are not quite
+deserted by the lower classes; yet, were the Romish to become the
+established religion, they would, to a certainty, all go over to it; you
+can scarcely imagine what a self-interested set they are--for example,
+the landlord of that public-house in which I first met you, having lost a
+sum of money upon a cock-fight, and his affairs in consequence being in a
+bad condition, is on the eve of coming over to us, in the hope that two
+old Popish females of property, whom I confess, will advance a sum of
+money to set him up again in the world.'
+
+'And what could have put such an idea into the poor fellow's head?' said
+I.
+
+'Oh, he and I have had some conversation upon the state of his affairs,'
+said the man in black; 'I think he might make a rather useful convert in
+these parts, provided things take a certain turn, as they doubtless will.
+It is no bad thing to have a fighting fellow, who keeps a public-house,
+belonging to one's religion.  He has been occasionally employed as a
+bully at elections by the Tory party, and he may serve us in the same
+capacity.  The fellow comes of a good stock; I heard him say that his
+father headed the High Church mob who sacked and burnt Priestley's house
+at Birmingham, towards the end of the last century.'
+
+'A disgraceful affair,' said I.
+
+'What do you mean by a disgraceful affair?' said the man in black.  'I
+assure you that nothing has occurred for the last fifty years which has
+given the High Church party so much credit in the eyes of Rome as
+that,--we did not imagine that the fellows had so much energy.  Had they
+followed up that affair by twenty others of a similar kind, they would by
+this time have had everything in their own power; but they did not, and,
+as a necessary consequence, they are reduced to almost nothing.'
+
+'I suppose,' said I, 'that your Church would have acted very differently
+in its place.'
+
+'It has always done so,' said the man in black, coolly sipping.  'Our
+Church has always armed the brute population against the genius and
+intellect of a country, provided that same intellect and genius were not
+willing to become its instruments and eulogists; and provided we once
+obtain a firm hold here again, we would not fail to do so.  We would
+occasionally stuff the beastly rabble with horseflesh and bitter ale, and
+then halloo them on against all those who were obnoxious to us.'
+
+'Horseflesh and bitter ale!' I replied.
+
+'Yes,' said the man in black; 'horseflesh and bitter ale--the favourite
+delicacies of their Saxon ancestors, who were always ready to do our
+bidding after a liberal allowance of such cheer.  There is a tradition in
+our Church, that before the Northumbrian rabble, at the instigation of
+Austin, attacked and massacred the presbyterian monks of Bangor, they had
+been allowed a good gorge of horseflesh and bitter ale.  He! he! he!'
+continued the man in black, 'what a fine spectacle to see such a mob,
+headed by a fellow like our friend the landlord, sack the house of
+another Priestley!'
+
+'Then you don't deny that we have had a Priestley,' said I, 'and admit
+the possibility of our having another?  You were lately observing that
+all English literary men were sycophants?'
+
+'Lickspittles,' said the man in black; 'yes, I admit that you have had a
+Priestley, but he was a Dissenter of the old class; you have had him, and
+perhaps may have another.'
+
+'Perhaps we may,' said I.  'But with respect to the lower classes, have
+you mixed much with them?'
+
+'I have mixed with all classes,' said the man in black, 'and with the
+lower not less than the upper and middle; they are much as I have
+described them; and of the three, the lower are the worst.  I never knew
+one of them that possessed the slightest principle, no, not ---.  It is
+true, there was one fellow whom I once met, who--; but it is a long
+story, and the affair happened abroad.--I ought to know something of the
+English people,' he continued, after a moment's pause; 'I have been many
+years amongst them, labouring in the cause of the Church.'
+
+'Your See must have had great confidence in your powers when it selected
+you to labour for it in these parts,' said I.
+
+'They chose me,' said the man in black, 'principally because, being of
+British extraction and education, I could speak the English language and
+bear a glass of something strong.  It is the opinion of my See that it
+would hardly do to send a missionary into a country like this who is not
+well versed in English--a country where, they think, so far from
+understanding any language besides his own, scarcely one individual in
+ten speaks his own intelligibly; or an ascetic person where, as they say,
+high and low, male and female, are, at some period of their lives, fond
+of a renovating glass, as it is styled--in other words, of tippling.'
+
+'Your See appears to entertain a very strange opinion of the English,'
+said I.
+
+'Not altogether an unjust one,' said the man in black, lifting the glass
+to his mouth.
+
+'Well,' said I, 'it is certainly very kind on its part to wish to bring
+back such a set of beings beneath its wing.'
+
+'Why, as to the kindness of my See,' said the man in black, 'I have not
+much to say; my See has generally in what it does a tolerably good
+motive; these heretics possess in plenty what my See has a great
+hankering for, and can turn to a good account--money!'
+
+'The Founder of the Christian religion cared nothing for money,' said I.
+
+'What have we to do with what the Founder of the Christian religion cared
+for?' said the man in black.  'How could our temples be built and our
+priests supported without money?  But you are unwise to reproach us with
+a desire of obtaining money; you forget that your own Church, if the
+Church of England be your own Church, as I suppose it is from the
+willingness which you displayed in the public-house to fight for it, is
+equally avaricious; look at your greedy Bishops and your corpulent
+Rectors--do they imitate Christ in His disregard for money?  You might as
+well tell me that they imitate Christ in His meekness and humility.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'whatever their faults may be, you can't say that they go
+to Rome for money.'
+
+The man in black made no direct answer, but appeared by the motion of his
+lips to be repeating something to himself.
+
+'I see your glass is again empty,' said I; 'perhaps you will replenish
+it.'
+
+The man in black arose from his seat, adjusted his habiliments, which
+were rather in disorder, and placed upon his head his hat, which he had
+laid aside; then, looking at me, who was still lying on the ground, he
+said--'I might, perhaps, take another glass, though I believe I have had
+quite as much as I can well bear; but I do not wish to hear you utter
+anything more this evening, after that last observation of yours--it is
+quite original; I will meditate upon it on my pillow this night, after
+having said an ave and a pater--go to Rome for money!'  He then made
+Belle a low bow, slightly motioned to me with his hand as if bidding
+farewell, and then left the dingle with rather uneven steps.
+
+'Go to Rome for money,' I heard him say as he ascended the winding path,
+'he! he! he!  Go to Rome for money, ho! ho! ho!'
+
+{picture:'Go to Rome for money,' I heard him say as he ascended the
+winding path, 'he! he! he!  Go to Rome for money, ho! ho! ho!':
+page538.jpg}
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCV
+
+
+Wooded retreat--Fresh shoes--Wood fire--Ash, when green--Queen of
+China--Cleverest people--Declensions--Armenian--Thunder--Deep olive--What
+do you mean?--Koul Adonai--The thick bushes--Wood pigeon--Old Gothe.
+
+Nearly three days elapsed without anything of particular moment
+occurring.  Belle drove the little cart containing her merchandise about
+the neighbourhood, returning to the dingle towards the evening.  As for
+myself, I kept within my wooded retreat, working during the periods of
+her absence leisurely at my forge.  Having observed that the quadruped
+which my companion drove was as much in need of shoes as my own had been
+some time previously, I had determined to provide it with a set, and
+during the aforesaid periods occupied myself in preparing them.  As I was
+employed three mornings and afternoons about them, I am sure that the
+reader will agree that I worked leisurely, or rather, lazily.  On the
+third day Belle arrived somewhat later than usual; I was lying on my back
+at the bottom of the dingle, employed in tossing up the shoes which I had
+produced, and catching them as they fell--some being always in the air
+mounting or descending, somewhat after the fashion of the waters of a
+fountain.
+
+{picture:I was lying on my back at the bottom of the dingle, employed in
+tossing up the shoes, and catching them as they fell: page540.jpg}
+
+'Why have you been absent so long?' said I to Belle; 'it must be long
+past four by the day.'
+
+'I have been almost killed by the heat,' said Belle; 'I was never out in
+a more sultry day--the poor donkey, too, could scarcely move along.'
+
+'He shall have fresh shoes,' said I, continuing my exercise; 'here they
+are quite ready; to-morrow I will tack them on.'
+
+'And why are you playing with them in that manner?' said Belle.
+
+'Partly in triumph at having made them, and partly to show that I can do
+something besides making them; it is not every one who, after having made
+a set of horse-shoes, can keep them going up and down in the air, without
+letting one fall--'
+
+'One has now fallen on your chin,' said Belle.
+
+'And another on my cheek,' said I, getting up; 'it is time to discontinue
+the game, for the last shoe drew blood.'
+
+Belle went to her own little encampment; and as for myself, after having
+flung the donkey's shoes into my tent, I put some fresh wood on the fire,
+which was nearly out, and hung the kettle over it.  I then issued forth
+from the dingle, and strolled round the wood that surrounded it; for a
+long time I was busied in meditation, looking at the ground, striking
+with my foot, half unconsciously, the tufts of grass and thistles that I
+met in my way.  After some time, I lifted up my eyes to the sky, at first
+vacantly, and then with more attention, turning my head in all directions
+for a minute or two; after which I returned to the dingle.  Isopel was
+seated near the fire, over which the kettle was now hung; she had changed
+her dress--no signs of the dust and fatigue of her late excursion
+remained; she had just added to the fire a small billet of wood, two or
+three of which I had left beside it; the fire cracked, and a sweet odour
+filled the dingle.
+
+'I am fond of sitting by a wood fire,' said Belle, 'when abroad, whether
+it be hot or cold; I love to see the flames dart out of the wood; but
+what kind is this, and where did you get it?'
+
+'It is ash,' said I, 'green ash.  Somewhat less than a week ago, whilst I
+was wandering along the road by the side of a wood, I came to a place
+where some peasants were engaged in cutting up and clearing away a
+confused mass of fallen timber: a mighty aged oak had given way the night
+before, and in its fall had shivered some smaller trees; the upper part
+of the oak, and the fragments of the rest, lay across the road.  I
+purchased, for a trifle, a bundle or two, and the wood on the fire is
+part of it--ash, green ash.'
+
+'That makes good the old rhyme,' said Belle, 'which I have heard sung by
+the old women in the great house:--
+
+   'Ash, when green,
+   Is fire for a queen.'
+
+{picture:'Ash, when green,
+Is fire for a queen.': page543.jpg}
+
+'And on fairer form of queen ash fire never shone,' said I, 'than on
+thine, O beauteous queen of the dingle.'
+
+'I am half disposed to be angry with you, young man,' said Belle.
+
+'And why not entirely?' said I.
+
+Belle made no reply.
+
+'Shall I tell you?' I demanded.  'You had no objection to the first part
+of the speech, but you did not like being called queen of the dingle.
+Well, if I had the power, I would make you queen of something better than
+the dingle--Queen of China.  Come, let us have tea.'
+
+'Something less would content me,' said Belle, sighing, as she rose to
+prepare our evening meal.
+
+So we took tea together, Belle and I.  'How delicious tea is after a hot
+summer's day and a long walk,' said she.
+
+'I daresay it is most refreshing then,' said I; 'but I have heard people
+say that they most enjoy it on a cold winter's night, when the kettle is
+hissing on the fire, and their children playing on the hearth.'
+
+Belle sighed.  'Where does tea come from?' she presently demanded.
+
+'From China,' said I; 'I just now mentioned it, and the mention of it put
+me in mind of tea.'
+
+'What kind of country is China?'
+
+'I know very little about it; all I know is, that it is a very large
+country far to the East, but scarcely large enough to contain its
+inhabitants, who are so numerous, that though China does not cover one-
+ninth part of the world, its inhabitants amount to one-third of the
+population of the world.'
+
+'And do they talk as we do?'
+
+'Oh no!  I know nothing of their language; but I have heard that it is
+quite different from all others, and so difficult that none but the
+cleverest people amongst foreigners can master it, on which account,
+perhaps, only the French pretend to know anything about it.'
+
+'Are the French so very clever, then?' said Belle.
+
+'They say there are no people like them, at least in Europe.  But talking
+of Chinese reminds me that I have not for some time past given you a
+lesson in Armenian.  The word for tea in Armenian is--by the bye what is
+the Armenian word for tea?'
+
+'That's your affair, not mine,' said Belle; 'it seems hard that the
+master should ask the scholar.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'whatever the word may be in Armenian, it is a noun; and
+as we have never yet declined an Armenian noun together, we may as well
+take this opportunity of declining one.  Belle, there are ten declensions
+in Armenian!
+
+'What's a declension?'
+
+'The way of declining a noun.'
+
+'Then, in the civilest way imaginable, I decline the noun.  Is that a
+declension?'
+
+'You should never play on words; to do so is low, vulgar, smelling of the
+pothouse, the workhouse.  Belle, I insist on your declining an Armenian
+noun.'
+
+'I have done so already,' said Belle.
+
+'If you go on in this way,' said I, 'I shall decline taking any more tea
+with you.  Will you decline an Armenian noun?'
+
+'I don't like the language,' said Belle.  'If you must teach me
+languages, why not teach me French or Chinese?'
+
+'I know nothing of Chinese; and as for French, none but a Frenchman is
+clever enough to speak it--to say nothing of teaching; no, we will stick
+to Armenian, unless, indeed, you would prefer Welsh!'
+
+'Welsh, I have heard, is vulgar,' said Belle; 'so, if I must learn one of
+the two, I will prefer Armenian, which I never heard of till you
+mentioned it to me; though, of the two, I really think Welsh sounds
+best.'
+
+'The Armenian noun,' said I, 'which I propose for your declension this
+night, is ---, which signifieth Master.'
+
+'I neither like the word nor the sound,' said Belle.
+
+'I can't help that,' said I; 'it is the word I choose: Master, with all
+its variations, being the first noun the sound of which I would have you
+learn from my lips.  Come, let us begin--
+
+'A master.  Of a master, etc.  Repeat--'
+
+'I am not much used to say the word,' said Belle, 'but to oblige you I
+will decline it as you wish'; and thereupon Belle declined Master in
+Armenian.
+
+'You have declined the noun very well,' said I; 'that is in the singular
+number; we will now go to the plural.'
+
+'What is the plural?' said Belle.
+
+'That which implies more than one, for example, Masters; you shall now go
+through masters in Armenian.'
+
+'Never,' said Belle, 'never; it is bad to have one master, but more I
+would never bear, whether in Armenian or English.'
+
+'You do not understand,' said I; 'I merely want you to decline Masters in
+Armenian.'
+
+'I do decline them; I will have nothing to do with them, nor with master
+either; I was wrong to--What sound is that?'
+
+'I did not hear it, but I daresay it is thunder; in Armenian--'
+
+'Never mind what it is in Armenian; but why do you think it is thunder?'
+
+'Ere I returned from my stroll, I looked up into the heavens, and by
+their appearance I judged that a storm was nigh at hand.'
+
+'And why did you not tell me so?'
+
+'You never asked me about the state of the atmosphere, and I am not in
+the habit of giving my opinion to people on any subject, unless
+questioned.  But, setting that aside, can you blame me for not troubling
+you with forebodings about storm and tempest, which might have prevented
+the pleasure you promised yourself in drinking tea, or perhaps a lesson
+in Armenian, though you pretend to dislike the latter?'
+
+'My dislike is not pretended,' said Belle; 'I hate the sound of it, but I
+love my tea, and it was kind of you not to wish to cast a cloud over my
+little pleasures; the thunder came quite time enough to interrupt it
+without being anticipated--there is another peal--I will clear away, and
+see that my tent is in a condition to resist the storm; and I think you
+had better bestir yourself.'
+
+Isopel departed, and I remained seated on my stone, as nothing belonging
+to myself required any particular attention; in about a quarter of an
+hour she returned, and seated herself upon her stool.
+
+'How dark the place is become since I left you,' said she; 'just as if
+night were just at hand.'
+
+'Look up at the sky,' said I; 'and you will not wonder; it is all of a
+deep olive.  The wind is beginning to rise; hark how it moans among the
+branches, and see how their tops are bending; it brings dust on its
+wings--I felt some fall on my face; and what is this, a drop of rain?'
+
+'We shall have plenty anon,' said Belle; 'do you hear? it already begins
+to hiss upon the embers; that fire of ours will soon be extinguished.'
+
+'It is not probable that we shall want it,' said I, 'but we had better
+seek shelter: let us go into my tent.'
+
+'Go in,' said Belle, 'but you go in alone; as for me, I will seek my
+own.'
+
+'You are right,' said I, 'to be afraid of me; I have taught you to
+decline master in Armenian.'
+
+'You almost tempt me,' said Belle, 'to make you decline mistress in
+English.'
+
+'To make matters short,' said I, 'I decline a mistress.'
+
+'What do you mean?' said Belle, angrily.
+
+'I have merely done what you wished me,' said I, 'and in your own style;
+there is no other way of declining anything in English, for in English
+there are no declensions.'
+
+'The rain is increasing,' said Belle.
+
+'It is so,' said I; 'I shall go to my tent; you may come if you please; I
+do assure you I am not afraid of you.'
+
+'Nor I of you,' said Belle; 'so I will come.  Why should I be afraid?  I
+can take my own part; that is--'
+
+We went into the tent and sat down, and now the rain began to pour with
+vehemence.  'I hope we shall not be flooded in this hollow,' said I to
+Belle.  'There is no fear of that,' said Belle; 'the wandering people,
+amongst other names, call it the dry hollow.  I believe there is a
+passage somewhere or other by which the wet is carried off.  There must
+be a cloud right above us, it is so dark.  Oh! what a flash!'
+
+'And what a peal!' said I; 'that is what the Hebrews call Koul Adonai--the
+voice of the Lord.  Are you afraid?'
+
+'No,' said Belle, 'I rather like to hear it.'
+
+'You are right,' said I, 'I am fond of the sound of thunder myself.  There
+is nothing like it; Koul Adonai behadar: the voice of the Lord is a
+glorious voice, as the prayer-book version hath it.'
+
+'There is something awful in it,' said Belle; 'and then the lightning--the
+whole dingle is now in a blaze.'
+
+'"The voice of the Lord maketh the hinds to calve, and discovereth the
+thick bushes."  As you say, there is something awful in thunder.'
+
+'There are all kinds of noises above us,' said Belle; 'surely I heard the
+crashing of a tree?'
+
+'"The voice of the Lord breaketh the cedar trees,"' said I, 'but what you
+hear is caused by a convulsion of the air; during a thunder-storm there
+are occasionally all kinds of aerial noises.  Ab Gwilym, who, next to
+King David, has best described a thunderstorm, speaks of these aerial
+noises in the following manner:--
+
+   'Astonied now I stand at strains,
+   As of ten thousand clanking chains;
+   And once, methought that, overthrown,
+   The welkin's oaks came whelming down;
+   Upon my head up starts my hair:
+   Why hunt abroad the hounds of air?
+   What cursed hag is screeching high,
+   Whilst crash goes all her crockery?'
+
+You would hardly believe, Belle, that though I offered at least ten
+thousand lines nearly as good as those to the booksellers in London, the
+simpletons were so blind to their interest, as to refuse purchasing
+them!'
+
+'I don't wonder at it,' said Belle, 'especially if such dreadful
+expressions frequently occur as that towards the end;--surely that was
+the crash of a tree?'
+
+'Ah!' said I, 'there falls the cedar tree--I mean the sallow; one of the
+tall trees on the outside of the dingle has been snapped short.'
+
+'What a pity,' said Belle, 'that the fine old oak, which you saw the
+peasants cutting up, gave way the other night, when scarcely a breath of
+air was stirring; how much better to have fallen in a storm like this,
+the fiercest I remember.'
+
+'I don't think so,' said I; 'after braving a thousand tempests, it was
+meeter for it to fall of itself than to be vanquished at last.  But to
+return to Ab Gwilym's poetry: he was above culling dainty words, and
+spoke boldly his mind on all subjects.  Enraged with the thunder for
+parting him and Morfydd, he says, at the conclusion of his ode,
+
+   'My curse, O Thunder, cling to thee,
+   For parting my dear pearl and me!'
+
+'You and I shall part, that is, I shall go to my tent, if you persist in
+repeating from him.  The man must have been a savage.  A poor wood-pigeon
+has fallen dead.'
+
+'Yes,' said I, 'there he lies, just outside the tent; often have I
+listened to his note when alone in this wilderness.  So you do not like
+Ab Gwilym; what say you to old Gothe?--
+
+   'Mist shrouds the night, and rack;
+   Hear, in the woods, what an awful crack!
+   Wildly the owls are flitting,
+   Hark to the pillars splitting
+   Of palaces verdant ever,
+   The branches quiver and sever,
+   The mighty stems are creaking,
+   The poor roots breaking and shrieking,
+   In wild mixt ruin down dashing,
+   O'er one another they're crashing;
+   Whilst 'midst the rocks so hoary
+   Whirlwinds hurry and worry.
+   Hear'st not, sister--'
+
+'Hark!' said Belle, 'hark!'
+
+   'Hear'st not, sister, a chorus
+   Of voices--?'
+
+'No,' said Belle, 'but I hear a voice.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCVI
+
+
+A shout--A fireball--See to the horses--Passing away--Gap in the hedge--On
+three wheels--Why do you stop?--No craven heart--The cordial--Across the
+country--Small bags.
+
+I listened attentively, but I could hear nothing but the loud clashing of
+branches, the pattering of rain, and the muttered growl of thunder.  I
+was about to tell Belle that she must have been mistaken, when I heard a
+shout--indistinct, it is true, owing to the noises aforesaid--from some
+part of the field above the dingle.  'I will soon see what's the matter,'
+said I to Belle, starting up.  'I will go too;' said the girl.  'Stay
+where you are,' said I; 'if I need you, I will call'; and, without
+waiting for any answer, I hurried to the mouth of the dingle.  I was
+about a few yards only from the top of the ascent, when I beheld a blaze
+of light, from whence I knew not; the next moment there was a loud crash,
+and I appeared involved in a cloud of sulphurous smoke.  'Lord have mercy
+upon us!' I heard a voice say, and methought I heard the plunging and
+struggling of horses.  I had stopped short on hearing the crash, for I
+was half stunned; but I now hurried forward, and in a moment stood upon
+the plain.  Here I was instantly aware of the cause of the crash and the
+smoke.  One of those balls, generally called fireballs, had fallen from
+the clouds, and was burning on the plain at a short distance; and the
+voice which I had heard, and the plunging, were as easily accounted for.
+Near the left-hand corner of the grove which surrounded the dingle, and
+about ten yards from the fireball, I perceived a chaise, with a postilion
+on the box, who was making efforts, apparently useless, to control his
+horses, which were kicking and plunging in the highest degree of
+excitement.  I instantly ran towards the chaise, in order to offer what
+help was in my power.  'Help me,' said the poor fellow, as I drew nigh;
+but before I could reach the horses, they had turned rapidly round, one
+of the fore-wheels flew from its axle-tree, the chaise was overset, and
+the postilion flung violently from his seat upon the field.  The horses
+now became more furious than before, kicking desperately, and
+endeavouring to disengage themselves from the fallen chaise.  As I was
+hesitating whether to run to the assistance of the postilion or endeavour
+to disengage the animals, I heard the voice of Belle exclaiming, 'See to
+the horses, I will look after the man.'  She had, it seems, been alarmed
+by the crash which accompanied the firebolt, and had hurried up to learn
+the cause.  I forthwith seized the horses by the heads, and used all the
+means I possessed to soothe and pacify them, employing every gentle
+modulation of which my voice was capable.  Belle, in the meantime, had
+raised up the man, who was much stunned by his fall; but, presently
+recovering his recollection to a certain degree, he came limping to me,
+holding his hand to his right thigh.  'The first thing that must now be
+done,' said I, 'is to free these horses from the traces; can you
+undertake to do so?'  ' I think I can,' said the man, looking at me
+somewhat stupidly.  'I will help,' said Belle, and without loss of time
+laid hold of one of the traces.  The man, after a short pause, also set
+to work, and in a few minutes the horses were extricated.  'Now,' said I
+to the man, 'what is next to be done?'  'I don't know,' said he; 'indeed,
+I scarcely know anything; I have been so frightened by this horrible
+storm, and so shaken by my fall.'  'I think,' said I, 'that the storm is
+passing away, so cast your fears away too; and as for your fall, you must
+bear it as lightly as you can.  I will tie the horses amongst those
+trees, and then we will all betake us to the hollow below.'  'And what's
+to become of my chaise?' said the postilion, looking ruefully on the
+fallen vehicle.  'Let us leave the chaise for the present,' said I; 'we
+can be of no use to it.'  'I don't like to leave my chaise lying on the
+ground in this weather,' said the man; 'I love my chaise, and him whom it
+belongs to.'  'You are quite right to be fond of yourself,' said I, 'on
+which account I advise you to seek shelter from the rain as soon as
+possible.'  'I was not talking of myself,' said the man, 'but my master,
+to whom the chaise belongs.'  'I thought you called the chaise yours,'
+said I.  'That's my way of speaking,' said the man; 'but the chaise is my
+master's, and a better master does not live.  Don't you think we could
+manage to raise up the chaise?'  'And what is to become of the horses?'
+said I.  'I love my horses well enough,' said the man; 'but they will
+take less harm than the chaise.  We two can never lift up that chaise.'
+'But we three can,' said Belle; 'at least, I think so; and I know where
+to find two poles which will assist us.'  'You had better go to the
+tent,' said I, 'you will be wet through.'  'I care not for a little
+wetting,' said Belle; 'moreover, I have more gowns than one--see you
+after the horses.'  Thereupon, I led the horses past the mouth of the
+dingle, to a place where a gap in the hedge afforded admission to the
+copse or plantation on the southern side.  Forcing them through the gap,
+I led them to a spot amidst the trees which I deemed would afford them
+the most convenient place for standing; then, darting down into the
+dingle, I brought up a rope, and also the halter of my own nag, and with
+these fastened them each to a separate tree in the best manner I could.
+This done, I returned to the chaise and the postilion.  In a minute or
+two Belle arrived with two poles which, it seems, had long been lying,
+overgrown with brushwood, in a ditch or hollow behind the plantation.
+With these both she and I set to work in endeavouring to raise the fallen
+chaise from the ground.
+
+We experienced considerable difficulty in this undertaking; at length,
+with the assistance of the postilion, we saw our efforts crowned with
+success--the chaise was lifted up, and stood upright on three wheels.
+
+{picture:At length, with the assistance of the postilion, we saw our
+efforts crowned with success--the chaise was lifted up, and stood upright
+on three wheels: page552.jpg}
+
+'We may leave it here in safety,' said I, 'for it will hardly move away
+on three wheels, even supposing it could run by itself; I am afraid there
+is work here for a wheelwright, in which case I cannot assist you; if you
+were in need of a blacksmith it would be otherwise.'  'I don't think
+either the wheel or the axle is hurt,' said the postilion, who had been
+handling both; 'it is only the linch-pin having dropped out that caused
+the wheel to fly off; if I could but find the linch-pin!--though,
+perhaps, it fell out a mile away.'  'Very likely,' said I; 'but never
+mind the linch-pin, I can make you one, or something that will serve: but
+I can't stay here any longer, I am going to my place below with this
+young gentlewoman, and you had better follow us.'  'I am ready,' said the
+man; and after lifting up the wheel and propping it against the chaise,
+he went with us, slightly limping, and with his hand pressed to his
+thigh.
+
+As we were descending the narrow path, Belle leading the way, and myself
+the last of the party, the postilion suddenly stopped short, and looked
+about him.  'Why do you stop?' said I.  'I don't wish to offend you,'
+said the man, 'but this seems to be a strange place you are leading me
+into; I hope you and the young gentlewoman, as you call her, don't mean
+me any harm--you seemed in a great hurry to bring me here.'  'We wished
+to get you out of the rain,' said I, 'and ourselves too; that is, if we
+can, which I rather doubt, for the canvas of a tent is slight shelter in
+such a rain; but what harm should we wish to do you?'  'You may think I
+have money,' said the man, 'and I have some, but only thirty shillings,
+and for a sum like that it would be hardly worth while to--'  'Would it
+not?' said I; 'thirty shillings, after all, are thirty shillings, and for
+what I know, half a dozen throats may have been cut in this place for
+that sum at the rate of five shillings each; moreover, there are the
+horses, which would serve to establish this young gentlewoman and myself
+in housekeeping, provided we were thinking of such a thing.'  'Then I
+suppose I have fallen into pretty hands,' said the man, putting himself
+in a posture of defence; 'but I'll show no craven heart; and if you
+attempt to lay hands on me, I'll try to pay you in your own coin.  I'm
+rather lamed in the leg, but I can still use my fists; so come on, both
+of you, man and woman, if woman this be, though she looks more like a
+grenadier.'
+
+'Let me hear no more of this nonsense,' said Belle; 'if you are afraid,
+you can go back to your chaise--we only seek to do you a kindness.'
+
+'Why, he was just now talking of cutting throats,' said the man.  'You
+brought it on yourself,' said Belle; 'you suspected us, and he wished to
+pass a joke upon you; he would not hurt a hair of your head, were your
+coach laden with gold, nor would I.'  'Well,' said the man, 'I was
+wrong--here's my hand to both of you,' shaking us by the hands; 'I'll go
+with you where you please, but I thought this a strange lonesome place,
+though I ought not much to mind strange lonesome places, having been in
+plenty of such when I was a servant in Italy, without coming to any
+harm--come, let us move on, for 'tis a shame to keep you two in the
+rain.'
+
+So we descended the path which led into the depths of the dingle; at the
+bottom I conducted the postilion to my tent, which, though the rain
+dripped and trickled through it, afforded some shelter; there I bade him
+sit down on the log of wood, whilst I placed myself as usual on my stone.
+Belle in the meantime had repaired to her own place of abode.  After a
+little time, I produced a bottle of the cordial of which I have
+previously had occasion to speak, and made my guest take a considerable
+draught.  I then offered him some, bread and cheese, which he accepted
+with thanks.  In about an hour the rain had much abated: 'What do you now
+propose to do?' said I.  'I scarcely know,' said the man; 'I suppose I
+must endeavour to put on the wheel with your help.'  'How far are you
+from your home?' I demanded.  'Upwards of thirty miles,' said the man;
+'my master keeps an inn on the great north road, and from thence I
+started early this morning with a family, which I conveyed across the
+country to a hall at some distance from here.  On my return I was beset
+by the thunderstorm, which frightened the horses, who dragged the chaise
+off the road to the field above, and overset it as you saw.  I had
+proposed to pass the night at an inn about twelve miles from here on my
+way back, though how I am to get there to-night I scarcely know, even if
+we can put on the wheel, for, to tell you the truth, I am shaken by my
+fall, and the smoulder and smoke of that fireball have rather bewildered
+my head; I am, moreover, not much acquainted with the way.
+
+'The best thing you can do,' said I, 'is to pass the night here; I will
+presently light a fire, and endeavour to make you comfortable--in the
+morning we will see to your wheel.'  'Well,' said the man, 'I shall be
+glad to pass the night here, provided I do not intrude, but I must see to
+the horses.'  Thereupon I conducted the man to the place where the horses
+were tied.  'The trees drip very much upon them,' said the man, 'and it
+will not do for them to remain here all night; they will be better out on
+the field picking the grass; but first of all they must have a good feed
+of corn.'  Thereupon he went to his chaise, from which he presently
+brought two small bags, partly filled with corn--into them he inserted
+the mouths of the horses, tying them over their heads.  'Here we will
+leave them for a time,' said the man; 'when I think they have had enough,
+I will come back, tie their fore-legs, and let them pick about.'
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCVII
+
+
+Fire of charcoal--The new-comer--No wonder!--Not a blacksmith--A love
+affair--Gretna Green--A cool thousand--Family estates--Borough
+interest--Grand education--Let us hear--Already quarrelling--Honourable
+parents--Most heroically--Not common people--Fresh charcoal.
+
+It might be about ten o'clock at night.  Belle, the postilion, and
+myself, sat just within the tent, by a fire of charcoal which I had
+kindled in the chafing-pan.  The man had removed the harness from his
+horses, and, after tethering their legs, had left them for the night in
+the field above to regale themselves on what grass they could find.  The
+rain had long since entirely ceased, and the moon and stars shone bright
+in the firmament, up to which, putting aside the canvas, I occasionally
+looked from the depths of the dingle.  Large drops of water, however,
+falling now and then upon the tent from the neighbouring trees, would
+have served, could we have forgotten it, to remind us of the recent
+storm, and also a certain chilliness in the atmosphere, unusual to the
+season, proceeding from the moisture with which the ground was saturated;
+yet these circumstances only served to make our party enjoy the charcoal
+fire the more.  There we sat bending over it: Belle, with her long
+beautiful hair streaming over her magnificent shoulders; the postilion
+smoking his pipe, in his shirt-sleeves and waistcoat, having flung aside
+his greatcoat, which had sustained a thorough wetting; and I without my
+wagoner's slop, of which, it being in the same plight, I had also
+divested myself.
+
+The new-comer was a well-made fellow of about thirty, with an open and
+agreeable countenance.  I found him very well informed for a man in his
+station, and with some pretensions to humour.  After we had discoursed
+for some time on indifferent subjects, the postilion, who had exhausted
+his pipe, took it from his mouth, and, knocking out the ashes upon the
+ground, exclaimed, 'I little thought, when I got up in the morning, that
+I should spend the night in such agreeable company, and after such a
+fright.'
+
+'Well,' said I, 'I am glad that your opinion of us has improved; it is
+not long since you seemed to hold us in rather a suspicious light.'
+
+'And no wonder,' said the man, 'seeing the place you were taking me to!  I
+was not a little, but very much afraid of ye both; and so I continued for
+some time, though, not to show a craven heart, I pretended to be quite
+satisfied; but I see I was altogether mistaken about ye.  I thought you
+vagrant gypsy folks and trampers; but now--'
+
+'Vagrant gypsy folks and trampers,' said I; 'and what are we but people
+of that stamp?'
+
+'Oh,' said the postilion, 'if you wish to be thought such, I am far too
+civil a person to contradict you, especially after your kindness to me,
+but--'
+
+'But!' said I; 'what do you mean by but?  I would have you to know that I
+am proud of being a travelling blacksmith; look at these donkey-shoes, I
+finished them this day.'
+
+The postilion took the shoes and examined them.  'So you made these
+shoes?' he cried at last.
+
+{picture:The postilion took the shoes and examined them.  'So you made
+these shoes?' he cried at last: page557.jpg}
+
+'To be sure I did; do you doubt it?'
+
+'Not in the least,' said the man.
+
+'Ah! ah!' said I, 'I thought I should bring you back to your original
+opinion.  I am, then, a vagrant gypsy body, a tramper, a wandering
+blacksmith.'
+
+'Not a blacksmith, whatever else you may be,' said the postilion,
+laughing.
+
+'Then how do you account for my making those shoes?'
+
+'By your not being a blacksmith,' said the postilion; 'no blacksmith
+would have made shoes in that manner.  Besides, what did you mean just
+now by saying you had finished these shoes to-day?  A real blacksmith
+would have flung off three or four sets of donkey-shoes in one morning,
+but you, I will be sworn, have been hammering at these for days, and they
+do you credit--but why?--because you are no blacksmith; no, friend, your
+shoes may do for this young gentlewoman's animal, but I shouldn't like to
+have my horses shod by you, unless at a great pinch indeed.'
+
+'Then,' said I, 'for what do you take me?'
+
+'Why, for some runaway young gentleman,' said the postilion.  'No
+offence, I hope?'
+
+'None at all; no one is offended at being taken or mistaken for a young
+gentleman, whether runaway or not; but from whence do you suppose I have
+run away?'
+
+'Why, from college,' said the man: 'no offence?'
+
+'None whatever; and what induced me to run away from college?'
+
+'A love affair, I'll be sworn,' said the postilion.  'You had become
+acquainted with this young gentlewoman, so she and you--'
+
+'Mind how you get on, friend,' said Belle, in a deep serious tone.
+
+'Pray proceed,' said I; 'I daresay you mean no offence.'
+
+'None in the world,' said the postilion; 'all I was going to say was,
+that you agreed to run away together, you from college, and she from
+boarding-school.  Well, there's nothing to be ashamed of in a matter like
+that, such things are done every day by young folks in high life.'
+
+'Are you offended?' said I to Belle.
+
+Belle made no answer; but, placing her elbows on her knees, buried her
+face in her hands.
+
+'So we ran away together?' said I.
+
+'Ay, ay,' said the postilion, 'to Gretna Green, though I can't say that I
+drove ye, though I have driven many a pair.'
+
+'And from Gretna Green we came here?'
+
+'I'll be bound you did,' said the man, 'till you could arrange matters at
+home.'
+
+'And the horse-shoes?' said I.
+
+'The donkey-shoes you mean,' answered the postilion; 'why, I suppose you
+persuaded the blacksmith who married you to give you, before you left, a
+few lessons in his trade.'
+
+'And we intend to stay here till we have arranged matters at home?'
+
+'Ay, ay,' said the postilion, 'till the old people are pacified, and they
+send you letters directed to the next post town, to be left till called
+for, beginning with "Dear children," and enclosing you each a cheque for
+one hundred pounds, when you will leave this place, and go home in a
+coach like gentlefolks, to visit your governors; I should like nothing
+better than to have the driving of you: and then there will be a grand
+meeting of the two families, and after a few reproaches, the old people
+will agree to do something handsome for the poor thoughtless things; so
+you will have a genteel house taken for you, and an annuity allowed you.
+You won't get much the first year, five hundred at the most, in order
+that the old folks may let you feel that they are not altogether
+satisfied with you, and that you are yet entirely in their power; but the
+second, if you don't get a cool thousand, may I catch cold, especially
+should young madam here present a son and heir for the old people to
+fondle, destined one day to become sole heir of the two illustrious
+houses; and then all the grand folks in the neighbourhood, who have--bless
+their prudent hearts!--kept rather aloof from you till then, for fear you
+should want anything from them--I say all the carriage people in the
+neighbourhood, when they see how swimmingly matters are going on, will
+come in shoals to visit you.'
+
+'Really,' said I, 'you are getting on swimmingly.'
+
+'Oh,' said the postilion, 'I was not a gentleman's servant nine years
+without learning the ways of gentry, and being able to know gentry when I
+see them.'
+
+'And what do you say to all this?' I demanded of Belle.
+
+'Stop a moment,' interposed the postilion, 'I have one more word to
+say:--and when you are surrounded by your comforts, keeping your nice
+little barouche and pair, your coachman and livery servant, and visited
+by all the carriage people in the neighbourhood--to say nothing of the
+time when you come to the family estates on the death of the old people--I
+shouldn't wonder if now and then you look back with longing and regret to
+the days when you lived in the damp dripping dingle, had no better
+equipage than a pony or donkey cart, and saw no better company than a
+tramper or gypsy, except once, when a poor postilion was glad to seat
+himself at your charcoal fire.'
+
+'Pray,' said I, 'did you ever take lessons in elocution?'
+
+'Not directly,' said the postilion; 'but my old master, who was in
+Parliament, did, and so did his son, who was intended to be an orator.  A
+great professor used to come and give them lessons, and I used to stand
+and listen, by which means I picked up a considerable quantity of what is
+called rhetoric.  In what I last said, I was aiming at what I have heard
+him frequently endeavouring to teach my governors as a thing
+indispensably necessary in all oratory, a graceful
+pere--pere--peregrination.'
+
+'Peroration, perhaps?'
+
+'Just so,' said the postilion; 'and now I'm sure I am not mistaken about
+you; you have taken lessons yourself, at first hand, in the college
+vacations, and a promising pupil you were, I make no doubt.  Well, your
+friends will be all the happier to get you back.  Has your governor much
+borough interest?'
+
+'I ask you once more,' said I, addressing myself to Belle, 'what you
+think of the history which this good man has made for us?'
+
+'What should I think of it,' said Belle, still keeping her face buried in
+her hands, 'but that it is mere nonsense?'
+
+'Nonsense!' said the postilion.
+
+'Yes,' said the girl, 'and you know it.'
+
+'May my leg always ache, if I do,' said the postilion, patting his leg
+with his hand; 'will you persuade me that this young man has never been
+at college?'
+
+'I have never been at college, but--'
+
+'Ay, ay,' said the postilion, 'but--'
+
+'I have been to the best schools in Britain, to say nothing of a
+celebrated one in Ireland.'
+
+'Well, then, it comes to the same thing,' said the postilion, 'or perhaps
+you know more than if you had been at college--and your governor--'
+
+'My governor, as you call him,' said I, 'is dead.'
+
+'And his borough interest?'
+
+'My father had no borough interest,' said I; 'had he possessed any, he
+would perhaps not have died, as he did, honourably poor.'
+
+'No, no,' said the postilion, 'if he had had borough interest, he
+wouldn't have been poor, nor honourable, though perhaps a right
+honourable.  However, with your grand education and genteel manners, you
+made all right at last by persuading this noble young gentlewoman to run
+away from boarding-school with you.'
+
+'I was never at boarding-school,' said Belle, 'unless you call--'
+
+'Ay, ay,' said the postilion, 'boarding-school is vulgar, I know: I beg
+your pardon, I ought to have called it academy, or by some other much
+finer name--you were in something much greater than a boarding-school.'
+
+'There you are right,' said Belle, lifting up her head and looking the
+postilion full in the face by the light of the charcoal fire, 'for I was
+bred in the workhouse.'
+
+'Wooh!' said the postilion.
+
+'It is true that I am of good--'
+
+'Ay, ay,' said the postilion, 'let us hear--'
+
+'Of good blood,' continued Belle; 'my name is Berners, Isopel Berners,
+though my parents were unfortunate.  Indeed, with respect to blood, I
+believe I am of better blood than the young man.'
+
+'There you are mistaken,' said I; 'by my father's side I am of Cornish
+blood, and by my mother's of brave French Protestant extraction.  Now,
+with respect to the blood of my father--and to be descended well on the
+father's side is the principal thing--it is the best blood in the world,
+for the Cornish blood, as the proverb says--'
+
+'I don't care what the proverb says,' said Belle; 'I say my blood is the
+best--my name is Berners, Isopel Berners--it was my mother's name, and is
+better, I am sure, than any you bear, whatever that may be; and though
+you say that the descent on the fathers side is the principal thing--and
+I know why you say so,' she added with some excitement--'I say that
+descent on the mother's side is of most account, because the mother--'
+
+'Just come from Gretna Green, and already quarrelling!' said the
+postilion.
+
+'We do not come from Gretna Green,' said Belle.
+
+'Ah, I had forgot,' said the postilion; 'none but great people go to
+Gretna Green.  Well, then, from church, and already quarrelling about
+family, just like two great people.'
+
+'We have never been to church,' said Belle; 'and to prevent any more
+guessing on your part, it will be as well for me to tell you, friend,
+that I am nothing to the young man, and he, of course, nothing to me.  I
+am a poor travelling girl, born in a workhouse: journeying on my
+occasions with certain companions, I came to this hollow, where my
+company quarrelled with the young man, who had settled down here, as he
+had a right to do if he pleased; and not being able to drive him out,
+they went away after quarrelling with me, too, for not choosing to side
+with them; so I stayed here along with the young man, there being room
+for us both, and the place being as free to me as to him.'
+
+'And in order that you may be no longer puzzled with respect to myself,'
+said I; 'I will give you a brief outline of my history.  I am the son of
+honourable parents, who gave me a first-rate education, as far as
+literature and languages went, with which education I endeavoured, on the
+death of my father, to advance myself to wealth and reputation in the big
+city; but failing in the attempt, I conceived a disgust for the busy
+world, and determined to retire from it.  After wandering about for some
+time, and meeting with various adventures, in one of which I contrived to
+obtain a pony, cart, and certain tools used by smiths and tinkers, I came
+to this place, where I amused myself with making horse-shoes, or rather
+pony-shoes, having acquired the art of wielding the hammer and tongs from
+a strange kind of smith--not him of Gretna Green--whom I knew in my
+childhood.  And here I lived, doing harm to no one, quite lonely and
+solitary, till one fine morning the premises were visited by this young
+gentlewoman and her companions.  She did herself anything but justice
+when she said that her companions quarrelled with her because she would
+not side with them against me; they quarrelled with her because she came
+most heroically to my assistance as I was on the point of being murdered;
+and she forgot to tell you that, after they had abandoned her, she stood
+by me in the--dark hour, comforting and cheering me, when unspeakable
+dread, to which I am occasionally subject, took possession of my mind.
+She says she is nothing to me, even as I am nothing to her.  I am of
+course nothing to her, but she is mistaken in thinking she is nothing to
+me.  I entertain the highest regard and admiration for her, being
+convinced that I might search the whole world in vain for a nature more
+heroic and devoted.'
+
+'And for my part,' said Belle, with a sob, 'a more quiet agreeable
+partner in a place like this I would not wish to have; it is true he has
+strange ways, and frequently puts words into my mouth very difficult to
+utter, but--but--' and here she buried her face once more in her hands.
+
+'Well,' said the postilion, 'I have been mistaken about you; that is, not
+altogether, but in part.  You are not rich folks, it seems, but you are
+not common people, and that I could have sworn.  What I call a shame is,
+that some people I have known are not in your place and you in theirs,
+you with their estates and borough interest, they in this dingle with
+these carts and animals; but there is no help for these things.  Were I
+the great Mumbo Jumbo above, I would endeavour to manage matters better;
+but being a simple postilion, glad to earn three shillings a day, I can't
+be expected to do much.'
+
+'Who is Mumbo Jumbo?' said I.
+
+'Ah!' said the postilion, 'I see there may be a thing or two I know
+better than yourself.  Mumbo Jumbo is a god of the black coast, to which
+people go for ivory and gold.'
+
+'Were you ever there?' I demanded.
+
+'No,' said the postilion, 'but I heard plenty of Mumbo Jumbo when I was a
+boy.'
+
+'I wish you would tell us something about yourself.  I believe that your
+own real history would prove quite as entertaining, if not more, than
+that which you imagined about us.'
+
+'I am rather tired,' said the postilion, 'and my leg is rather
+troublesome.  I should be glad to try to sleep upon one of your blankets.
+However, as you wish to hear something about me, I shall be happy to
+oblige you; but your fire is rather low, and this place is chilly.'
+
+Thereupon I arose, and put fresh charcoal on the pan; then taking it
+outside the tent, with a kind of fan which I had fashioned, I fanned the
+coals into a red glow, and continued doing so until the greater part of
+the noxious gas, which the coals are in the habit of exhaling, was
+exhausted.  I then brought it into the tent and reseated myself,
+scattering over the coals a small portion of sugar.  'No bad smell,' said
+the postilion; 'but upon the whole I think I like the smell of tobacco
+better; and with your permission I will once more light my pipe.'
+
+Thereupon he relighted his pipe; and, after taking two or three whiffs,
+began in the following manner.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCVIII
+
+
+An exordium--Fine ships--High Barbary captains--Free-born
+Englishmen--Monstrous figure--Swashbuckler--The grand coaches--The
+footmen--A travelling expedition--Black Jack--Nelson's cannon--Pharaoh's
+butler--A diligence--Two passengers--Sharking priest--Virgilio--Lessons
+in Italian--Two opinions--Holy Mary--Priestly confederates--Methodist
+chapel--Veturini--Some of our party--Like a sepulchre--All for
+themselves.
+
+'I am a poor postilion, as you see; yet, as I have seen a thing or two
+and heard a thing or two of what is going on in the world, perhaps what I
+have to tell you connected with myself may not prove altogether
+uninteresting.  Now, my friends, this manner of opening a story is what
+the man who taught rhetoric would call a hex--hex--'
+
+'Exordium,' said I.
+
+'Just so,' said the postilion; 'I treated you to a per--per--peroration
+some time ago, so that I have contrived to put the cart before the horse,
+as the Irish orators frequently do in the honourable House, in whose
+speeches, especially those who have taken lessons in rhetoric, the
+per--per--what's the word?--frequently goes before the exordium.
+
+'I was born in the neighbouring county; my father was land-steward to a
+squire of about a thousand a year.  My father had two sons, of whom I am
+the youngest by some years.  My elder brother was of a spirited roving
+disposition, and for fear that he should turn out what is generally
+termed ungain, my father determined to send him to sea: so once upon a
+time, when my brother was about fifteen, he took him to the great seaport
+of the county, where he apprenticed him to a captain of one of the ships
+which trade to the high Barbary coast.  Fine ships they were, I have
+heard say, more than thirty in number, and all belonging to a wonderful
+great gentleman, who had once been a parish boy, but had contrived to
+make an immense fortune by trading to that coast for gold-dust, ivory,
+and other strange articles; and for doing so, I mean for making a
+fortune, had been made a knight baronet.  So my brother went to the high
+Barbary shore, on board the fine vessel, and in about a year returned and
+came to visit us; he repeated the voyage several times, always coming to
+see his parents on his return.  Strange stories he used to tell us of
+what he had been witness to on the high Barbary coast, both off shore and
+on.  He said that the fine vessel in which he sailed was nothing better
+than a painted hell; that the captain was a veritable fiend, whose grand
+delight was in tormenting his men, especially when they were sick, as
+they frequently were, there being always fever on the high Barbary coast;
+and that though the captain was occasionally sick himself, his being so
+made no difference, or rather it did make a difference, though for the
+worse, he being when sick always more inveterate and malignant than at
+other times.  He said that once, when he himself was sick, his captain
+had pitched his face all over, which exploit was much applauded by the
+other high Barbary captains--all of whom, from what my brother said,
+appeared to be of much the same disposition as my brother's captain,
+taking wonderful delight in tormenting the crews, and doing all manner of
+terrible things.  My brother frequently said that nothing whatever
+prevented him from running away from his ship, and never returning, but
+the hope he entertained of one day being captain himself, and able to
+torment people in his turn, which he solemnly vowed he would do, as a
+kind of compensation for what he himself had undergone.  And if things
+were going on in a strange way off the high Barbary shore amongst those
+who came there to trade, they were going on in a way yet stranger with
+the people who lived upon it.
+
+'Oh the strange ways of the black men who lived on that shore, of which
+my brother used to tell us at home--selling their sons, daughters, and
+servants for slaves, and the prisoners taken in battle, to the Spanish
+captains, to be carried to Havannah, and when there, sold at a profit,
+the idea of which, my brother said, went to the hearts of our own
+captains, who used to say what a hard thing it was that free-born
+Englishmen could not have a hand in the traffic, seeing that it was
+forbidden by the laws of their country; talking fondly of the good old
+times when their forefathers used to carry slaves to Jamaica and
+Barbadoes, realising immense profit, besides the pleasure of hearing
+their shrieks on the voyage; and then the superstitions of the blacks,
+which my brother used to talk of; their sharks' teeth, their wisps of
+fowls' feathers, their half-baked pots full of burnt bones, of which they
+used to make what they called fetish, and bow down to, and ask favours
+of, and then, perhaps, abuse and strike, provided the senseless rubbish
+did not give them what they asked for; and then, above all, Mumbo Jumbo,
+the grand fetish master, who lived somewhere in the woods, and who used
+to come out every now and then with his fetish companions; a monstrous
+figure, all wound round with leaves and branches, so as to be quite
+indistinguishable, and, seating himself on the high seat in the villages,
+receive homage from the people, and also gifts and offerings, the most
+valuable of which were pretty damsels, and then betake himself back
+again, with his followers, into the woods.  Oh the tales that my brother
+used to tell us of the high Barbary shore!  Poor fellow! what became of
+him I can't say; the last time he came back from a voyage, he told us
+that his captain, as soon as he had brought his vessel to port and
+settled with his owner, drowned himself off the quay, in a fit of the
+horrors, which it seems high Barbary captains, after a certain number of
+years, are much subject to.  After staying about a month with us, he went
+to sea again, with another captain; and, bad as the old one had been, it
+appears the new one was worse, for, unable to bear his treatment, my
+brother left his ship off the high Barbary shore, and ran away up the
+country.  Some of his comrades, whom we afterwards saw, said that there
+were various reports about him on the shore; one that he had taken on
+with Mumbo Jumbo, and was serving him in his house in the woods, in the
+capacity of swashbuckler, or life-guardsman; another, that he was gone in
+quest of a mighty city in the heart of the negro country; another, that
+in swimming a stream he had been devoured by an alligator.  Now, these
+two last reports were bad enough; the idea of their flesh and blood being
+bit asunder by a ravenous fish was sad enough to my poor parents; and not
+very comfortable was the thought of his sweltering over the hot sands in
+quest of the negro city; but the idea of their son, their eldest child,
+serving Mumbo Jumbo as swashbuckler was worst of all, and caused my poor
+parents to shed many a scalding tear.
+
+'I stayed at home with my parents until I was about eighteen, assisting
+my father in various ways.  I then went to live at the Squire's, partly
+as groom, partly as footman.  After living in the country some time, I
+attended the family in a trip of six weeks which they made to London.
+Whilst there, happening to have some words with an old ill-tempered
+coachman, who had been for a great many years in the family, my master
+advised me to leave, offering to recommend me to a family of his
+acquaintance who were in need of a footman.  I was glad to accept his
+offer, and in a few days went to my new place.  My new master was one of
+the great gentry, a baronet in Parliament, and possessed of an estate of
+about twenty thousand a year; his family consisted of his lady, a son, a
+fine young man just coming of age, and two very sweet amiable daughters.
+I liked this place much better than my first, there was so much more
+pleasant noise and bustle--so much more grand company, and so many more
+opportunities of improving myself.  Oh, how I liked to see the grand
+coaches drive up to the door, with the grand company; and though, amidst
+that company, there were some who did not look very grand, there were
+others, and not a few, who did.  Some of the ladies quite captivated me;
+there was the Marchioness of--in particular.  This young lady puts me
+much in mind of her; it is true, the Marchioness, as I saw her then, was
+about fifteen years older than this young gentlewoman is now, and not so
+tall by some inches, but she had the very same hair, and much the same
+neck and shoulders--no offence, I hope?  And then some of the young
+gentlemen, with their cool, haughty, care-for-nothing looks, struck me as
+being very fine fellows.  There was one in particular, whom I frequently
+used to stare at, not altogether unlike some one I have seen
+hereabouts--he had a slight cast in his eye, and . . . but I won't enter
+into every particular.  And then the footmen!  Oh, how those footmen
+helped to improve me with their conversation.  Many of them could
+converse much more glibly than their masters, and appeared to have much
+better taste.  At any rate, they seldom approved of what their masters
+did.  I remember being once with one in the gallery of the play-house,
+when something of Shakspeare's was being performed: some one in the first
+tier of boxes was applauding very loudly.  "That's my fool of a
+governor," said he; "he is weak enough to like Shakspeare--I don't;--he's
+so confoundedly low, but he won't last long--going down.  Shakspeare
+culminated"--I think that was the word--"culminated some time ago."
+
+'And then the professor of elocution, of whom my governors used to take
+lessons, and of which lessons I had my share, by listening behind the
+door; but for that professor of elocution I should not be able to round
+my periods--an expression of his--in the manner I do.
+
+'After I had been three years at this place my mistress died.  Her death,
+however, made no great alteration in my way of living, the family
+spending their winters in London, and their summers at their old seat in
+S--- as before.  At last, the young ladies, who had not yet got husbands,
+which was strange enough, seeing, as I told you before, they were very
+amiable, proposed to our governor a travelling expedition abroad.  The
+old baronet consented, though young master was much against it, saying
+they would all be much better at home.  As the girls persisted, however,
+he at last withdrew his opposition, and even promised to follow them as
+soon as his parliamentary duties would permit; for he was just got into
+Parliament, and, like most other young members, thought that nothing
+could be done in the House without him.  So the old gentleman and the two
+young ladies set off, taking me with them, and a couple of ladies' maids
+to wait upon them.  First of all, we went to Paris, where we continued
+three months, the old baronet and the ladies going to see the various
+sights of the city and the neighbourhood, and I attending them.  They
+soon got tired of sight-seeing, and of Paris too; and so did I.  However,
+they still continued there, in order, I believe, that the young ladies
+might lay in a store of French finery.  I should have passed my idle time
+at Paris, of which I had plenty after the sight-seeing was over, very
+unpleasantly, but for Black Jack.  Eh! did you never hear of Black Jack?
+Ah! if you had ever been an English servant in Paris, you would have
+known Black Jack; not an English gentleman's servant who has been at
+Paris for this last ten years but knows Black Jack and his ordinary.  A
+strange fellow he was--of what country no one could exactly say--for as
+for judging from speech, that was impossible, Jack speaking all languages
+equally ill.  Some said he came direct from Satan's kitchen, and that
+when he gives up keeping ordinary, he will return there again, though the
+generally-received opinion at Paris was, that he was at one time butler
+to King Pharaoh; and that, after lying asleep for four thousand years in
+a place called the Kattycombs, he was awaked by the sound of Nelson's
+cannon at the battle of the Nile, and going to the shore, took on with
+the admiral, and became, in course of time, ship steward; and that after
+Nelson's death he was captured by the French, on board one of whose
+vessels he served in a somewhat similar capacity till the peace, when he
+came to Paris, and set up an ordinary for servants, sticking the name of
+Katcomb over the door, in allusion to the place where he had his long
+sleep.  But, whatever his origin was, Jack kept his own counsel, and
+appeared to care nothing for what people said about him, or called him.
+Yes, I forgot, there was one name he would not be called, and that was
+"Portuguese."  I once saw Black Jack knock down a coachman, six foot
+high, who called him black-faced Portuguese.  "Any name but dat, you
+shab," said Black Jack, who was a little round fellow, of about five feet
+two; "I would not stand to be called Portuguese by Nelson himself."  Jack
+was rather fond of talking about Nelson, and hearing people talk about
+him, so that it is not improbable that he may have sailed with him; and
+with respect to his having been King Pharaoh's butler, all I have to say
+is, I am not disposed to give the downright lie to the report. Jack was
+always ready to do a kind turn to a poor servant out of place, and has
+often been known to assist such as were in prison, which charitable
+disposition he perhaps acquired from having lost a good place himself,
+having seen the inside of a prison, and known the want of a meal's
+victuals, all which trials King Pharaoh's butler underwent, so he may
+have been that butler; at any rate, I have known positive conclusions
+come to on no better premisses, if indeed as good.  As for the story of
+his coming direct from Satan's kitchen, I place no confidence in it at
+all, as Black Jack had nothing of Satan about him but blackness, on which
+account he was called Black Jack.  Nor am I disposed to give credit to a
+report that his hatred of the Portuguese arose from some ill treatment
+which he had once experienced when on shore, at Lisbon, from certain
+gentlewomen of the place, but rather conclude that it arose from an
+opinion he entertained that the Portuguese never paid their debts, one of
+the ambassadors of that nation, whose house he had served, having left
+Paris several thousand francs in his debt.  This is all that I have to
+say about Black Jack, without whose funny jokes and good ordinary I
+should have passed my time in Paris in a very disconsolate manner.
+
+'After we had been at Paris between two and three months, we left it in
+the direction of Italy, which country the family had a great desire to
+see.  After travelling a great many days in a thing which, though called
+a diligence, did not exhibit much diligence, we came to a great big town,
+seated around a nasty salt-water bason, connected by a narrow passage
+with the sea.  Here we were to embark; and so we did as soon as possible,
+glad enough to get away--at least I was, and so I make no doubt were the
+rest, for such a place for bad smells I never was in.  It seems all the
+drains and sewers of the place run into that same salt bason, voiding
+into it all their impurities, which, not being able to escape into the
+sea in any considerable quantity, owing to the narrowness of the
+entrance, there accumulate, filling the whole atmosphere with these same
+outrageous scents, on which account the town is a famous lodging-house of
+the plague.  The ship in which we embarked was bound for a place in Italy
+called Naples, where we were to stay some time.  The voyage was rather a
+lazy one, the ship not being moved by steam; for at the time of which I
+am speaking, some five years ago, steam-ships were not so plentiful as
+now.  There were only two passengers in the grand cabin, where my
+governor and his daughters were, an Italian lady and a priest.  Of the
+lady I have not much to say; she appeared to be a quiet respectable
+person enough, and after our arrival at Naples I neither saw nor heard
+anything more of her; but of the priest I shall have a good deal to say
+in the sequel (that, by the bye, is a word I learnt from the professor of
+rhetoric), and it would have been well for our family had they never met
+him.
+
+'On the third day of the voyage the priest came to me, who was rather
+unwell with sea-sickness, which he, of course, felt nothing of--that kind
+of people being never affected like others.  He was a finish-looking man
+of about forty-five, but had something strange in his eyes, which I have
+since thought denoted that all was not right in a certain place called
+the heart.  After a few words of condolence, in a broken kind of English,
+he asked me various questions about our family; and I, won by his seeming
+kindness, told him all I knew about them--of which communicativeness I
+afterwards very much repented.  As soon as he had got out of me all he
+desired, he left me; and I observed that during the rest of the voyage he
+was wonderfully attentive to our governor, and yet more to the young
+ladies.  Both, however, kept him rather at a distance; the young ladies
+were reserved, and once or twice I heard our governor cursing him between
+his teeth for a sharking priest.  The priest, however, was not
+disconcerted, and continued his attentions, which in a little time
+produced an effect, so that, by the time we landed at Naples, our great
+folks had conceived a kind of liking for the man, and when they took
+their leave invited him to visit them, which he promised to do.  We hired
+a grand house or palace at Naples; it belonged to a poor kind of prince,
+who was glad enough to let it to our governor, and also his servants and
+carriages; and glad enough were the poor servants, for they got from us
+what they never got from the prince--plenty of meat and money; and glad
+enough, I make no doubt, were the horses for the provender we gave them;
+and I daresay the coaches were not sorry to be cleaned and furbished up.
+Well, we went out and came in; going to see the sights, and returning.
+Amongst other things we saw was the burning mountain, and the tomb of a
+certain sorcerer called Virgilio, who made witch rhymes, by which he
+could raise the dead.  Plenty of people came to see us, both English and
+Italians, and amongst the rest the priest.  He did not come amongst the
+first, but allowed us to settle and become a little quiet before he
+showed himself; and after a day or two he paid us another visit, then
+another, till at last his visits were daily.
+
+'I did not like that Jack Priest; so I kept my eye upon all his motions.
+Lord! how that Jack Priest did curry favour with our governor and the two
+young ladies; and he curried, and curried, till he had got himself into
+favour with the governor, and more especially with the two young ladies,
+of whom their father was doatingly fond.  At last the ladies took lessons
+in Italian of the priest, a language in which he was said to be a grand
+proficient, and of which they had hitherto known but very little; and
+from that time his influence over them, and consequently over the old
+governor, increased, till the tables were turned, and he no longer
+curried favour with them, but they with him--yes, as true as my leg
+aches, the young ladies curried, and the old governor curried favour with
+that same priest; when he was with them, they seemed almost to hang on
+his lips, that is, the young ladies; and as for the old governor, he
+never contradicted him, and when the fellow was absent, which, by the
+bye, was not often, it was, "Father so-and-so said this," and "Father so-
+and-so said that"; "Father so-and-so thinks we should do so-and-so, or
+that we should not do so-and-so."  I at first thought that he must have
+given them something, some philtre or the like, but one of the English
+maid-servants, who had a kind of respect for me, and who saw much more
+behind the scenes than I did, informed me that he was continually
+instilling strange notions into their heads, striving, by every possible
+method, to make them despise the religion of their own land, and take up
+that of the foreign country in which they were.  And sure enough, in a
+little time, the girls had altogether left off going to an English
+chapel, and were continually visiting places of Italian worship.  The old
+governor, it is true, still went to his church, but he appeared to be
+hesitating between two opinions; and once, when he was at dinner, he said
+to two or three English friends that, since he had become better
+acquainted with it, he had conceived a much more favourable opinion of
+the Catholic religion than he had previously entertained.  In a word, the
+priest ruled the house, and everything was done according to his will and
+pleasure; by degrees he persuaded the young ladies to drop their English
+acquaintances, whose place he supplied with Italians, chiefly females.  My
+poor old governor would not have had a person to speak to--for he never
+could learn the language--but for two or three Englishmen who used to
+come occasionally and take a bottle with him in a summer-house, whose
+company he could not be persuaded to resign, notwithstanding the
+entreaties of his daughters, instigated by the priest, whose grand
+endeavour seemed to be to render the minds of all three foolish, for his
+own ends.  And if he was busy above stairs with the governor, there was
+another busy below with us poor English servants, a kind of subordinate
+priest, a low Italian; as he could speak no language but his own, he was
+continually jabbering to us in that, and by hearing him the maids and
+myself contrived to pick up a good deal of the language, so that we
+understood most that was said, and could speak it very fairly; and the
+themes of his jabber were the beauty and virtues of one whom he called
+Holy Mary, and the power and grandeur of one whom he called the Holy
+Father; and he told us that we should shortly have an opportunity of
+seeing the Holy Father, who could do anything he liked with Holy Mary: in
+the meantime we had plenty of opportunities of seeing Holy Mary, for in
+every church, chapel, and convent to which we were taken, there was an
+image of Holy Mary, who, if the images were dressed at all in her
+fashion, must have been very fond of short petticoats and tinsel, and
+who, if those said figures at all resembled her in face, could scarcely
+have been half as handsome as either of my two fellow-servants, not to
+speak of the young ladies.
+
+'Now it happened that one of the female servants was much taken with what
+she saw and heard, and gave herself up entirely to the will of the
+subordinate, who had quite as much dominion over her as his superior had
+over the ladies; the other maid, however, the one who had a kind of
+respect for me, was not so easily besotted; she used to laugh at what she
+saw, and at what the fellow told her, and from her I learnt that amongst
+other things intended by these priestly confederates was robbery; she
+said that the poor old governor had already been persuaded by his
+daughters to put more than a thousand pounds into the superior priest's
+hands for purposes of charity and religion, as was said, and that the
+subordinate one had already inveigled her fellow-servant out of every
+penny which she had saved from her wages, and had endeavoured likewise to
+obtain what money she herself had, but in vain.  With respect to myself,
+the fellow shortly after made an attempt towards obtaining a hundred
+crowns, of which, by some means, he knew me to be in possession, telling
+me what a meritorious thing it was to give one's superfluities for the
+purposes of religion.  "That is true," said I, "and if, after my return
+to my native country, I find I have anything which I don't want myself, I
+will employ it in helping to build a Methodist chapel."
+
+'By the time that the three months were expired for which we had hired
+the palace of the needy Prince, the old governor began to talk of
+returning to England, at least of leaving Italy.  I believe he had become
+frightened at the calls which were continually being made upon him for
+money; for after all, you know, if there is a sensitive part of a man's
+wearing apparel, it is his breeches pocket; but the young ladies could
+not think of leaving dear Italy and the dear priest; and then they had
+seen nothing of the country, they had only seen Naples; before leaving
+dear Italia they must see more of the country and the cities; above all,
+they must see a place which they called the Eternal City, or some similar
+nonsensical name; and they persisted so that the poor governor permitted
+them, as usual, to have their way; and it was decided what route they
+should take--that is, the priest was kind enough to decide for them, and
+was also kind enough to promise to go with them part of the route, as far
+as a place where there was a wonderful figure of Holy Mary, which the
+priest said it was highly necessary for them to see before visiting the
+Eternal City: so we left Naples in hired carriages, driven by fellows
+they call veturini, cheating, drunken dogs, I remember they were.  Besides
+our own family there was the priest and his subordinate, and a couple of
+hired lackeys.  We were several days upon the journey, travelling through
+a very wild country, which the ladies pretended to be delighted with, and
+which the governor cursed on account of the badness of the roads; and
+when we came to any particularly wild spot we used to stop, in order to
+enjoy the scenery, as the ladies said; and then we would spread a horse-
+cloth on the ground, and eat bread and cheese, and drink wine of the
+country.  And some of the holes and corners in which we bivouacked, as
+the ladies called it, were something like this place where we are now, so
+that when I came down here it put me in mind of them.  At last we arrived
+at the place where was the holy image.
+
+'We went to the house or chapel in which the holy image was kept--a
+frightful, ugly black figure of Holy Mary, dressed in her usual way; and
+after we had stared at the figure, and some of our party had bowed down
+to it, we were shown a great many things which were called holy relics,
+which consisted of thumb-nails, and fore-nails, and toe-nails, and hair,
+and teeth, and a feather or two, and a mighty thigh-bone, but whether of
+a man or a camel I can't say; all of which things, I was told, if
+properly touched and handled, had mighty power to cure all kinds of
+disorders.  And as we went from the holy house we saw a man in a state of
+great excitement: he was foaming at the mouth, and cursing the holy image
+and all its household, because, after he had worshipped it and made
+offerings to it, and besought it to assist him in a game of chance which
+he was about to play, it had left him in the lurch, allowing him to lose
+all his money.  And when I thought of all the rubbish I had seen, and the
+purposes which it was applied to, in conjunction with the rage of the
+losing gamester at the deaf and dumb image, I could not help comparing
+the whole with what my poor brother used to tell me of the superstitious
+practices of the blacks on the high Barbary shore, and their occasional
+rage and fury at the things they worshipped; and I said to myself, If all
+this here doesn't smell of fetish, may I smell fetid.
+
+'At this place the priest left us, returning to Naples with his
+subordinate, on some particular business I suppose.  It was, however,
+agreed that he should visit us at the Holy City.  We did not go direct to
+the Holy City, but bent our course to two or three other cities which the
+family were desirous of seeing; but as nothing occurred to us in these
+places of any particular interest, I shall take the liberty of passing
+them by in silence.  At length we arrived at the Eternal City: an immense
+city it was, looking as if it had stood for a long time, and would stand
+for a long time still; compared with it, London would look like a mere
+assemblage of bee-skeps; however, give me the bee-skeps with their merry
+hum and bustle, and life and honey, rather than that huge town, which
+looked like a sepulchre, where there was no life, no busy hum, no bees,
+but a scanty sallow population, intermixed with black priests, white
+priests, gray priests; and though I don't say there was no honey in the
+place, for I believe there was, I am ready to take my Bible oath that it
+was not made there, and that the priests kept it all for themselves.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XCIX
+
+
+A cloister--Half English--New acquaintance--Mixed liquors--Turning
+Papist--Purposes of charity--Foreign religion--Melancholy--Elbowing and
+pushing--Outlandish sight--The figure--I don't care for
+you--Merry-andrews--One good--Religion of my country--Fellow of spirit--A
+dispute--The next morning--Female doll--Proper dignity--Fetish country.
+
+'The day after our arrival,' continued the postilion, 'I was sent, under
+the guidance of a lackey of the place, with a letter, which the priest,
+when he left, had given us for a friend of his in the Eternal City.  We
+went to a large house, and on ringing were admitted by a porter into a
+cloister, where I saw some ill-looking, shabby young fellows walking
+about, who spoke English to one another.  To one of these the porter
+delivered the letter, and the young fellow, going away, presently
+returned and told me to follow him; he led me into a large room where,
+behind a table on which were various papers and a thing which they call,
+in that country, a crucifix, sat a man in a kind of priestly dress.  The
+lad having opened the door for me, shut it behind me, and went away.  The
+man behind the table was so engaged in reading the letter which I had
+brought, that at first he took no notice of me; he had red hair, a kind
+of half-English countenance, and was seemingly about five-and-thirty.
+After a little time he laid the letter down, appeared to consider a
+moment, and then opened his mouth with a strange laugh, not a loud laugh,
+for I heard nothing but a kind of hissing deep down the throat; all of a
+sudden, however, perceiving me, he gave a slight start, but, instantly
+recovering himself, he inquired in English concerning the health of the
+family, and where we lived: on my delivering him a card, he bade me
+inform my master and the ladies that in the course of the day he would do
+himself the honour of waiting upon them.  He then arose and opened the
+door for me to depart.  The man was perfectly civil and courteous, but I
+did not like that strange laugh of his after having read the letter.  He
+was as good as his word, and that same day paid us a visit.  It was now
+arranged that we should pass the winter in Rome--to my great annoyance,
+for I wished to return to my native land, being heartily tired of
+everything connected with Italy.  I was not, however, without hope that
+our young master would shortly arrive, when I trusted that matters, as
+far as the family were concerned, would be put on a better footing.  In a
+few days our new acquaintance, who, it seems, was a mongrel Englishman,
+had procured a house for our accommodation; it was large enough, but not
+near so pleasant as that we had at Naples, which was light and airy, with
+a large garden.  This was a dark gloomy structure in a narrow street,
+with a frowning church beside it; it was not far from the place where our
+new friend lived, and its being so was probably the reason why he
+selected it.  It was furnished partly with articles which we bought, and
+partly with those which we hired.  We lived something in the same way as
+at Naples; but though I did not much like Naples, I yet liked it better
+than this place, which was so gloomy.  Our new acquaintance made himself
+as agreeable as he could, conducting the ladies to churches and convents,
+and frequently passing the afternoon drinking with the governor, who was
+fond of a glass of brandy and water and a cigar, as the new acquaintance
+also was--no, I remember, he was fond of gin and water, and did not
+smoke.  I don't think he had so much influence over the young ladies as
+the other priest, which was, perhaps, owing to his not being so
+good-looking; but I am sure he had more influence with the governor,
+owing, doubtless, to his bearing him company in drinking mixed liquors,
+which the other priest did not do.
+
+'He was a strange fellow, that same new acquaintance of ours, and unlike
+all the priests I saw in that country, and I saw plenty of various
+nations; they were always upon their guard, and had their features and
+voice modulated; but this man was subject to fits of absence, during
+which he would frequently mutter to himself, then, though he was
+perfectly civil to everybody, as far as words went, I observed that he
+entertained a thorough contempt for most people, especially for those
+whom he was making dupes.  I have observed him whilst drinking with our
+governor, when the old man's head was turned, look at him with an air
+which seemed to say, "What a thundering old fool you are"; and at our
+young ladies, when their backs were turned, with a glance which said
+distinctly enough, "You precious pair of ninnyhammers"; and then his
+laugh--he had two kinds of laughs--one which you could hear, and another
+which you could only see.  I have seen him laugh at our governor and the
+young ladies, when their heads were turned away, but I heard no sound.  My
+mother had a sandy cat, which sometimes used to open its mouth wide with
+a mew which nobody could hear, and the silent laugh of that red-haired
+priest used to put me wonderfully in mind of the silent mew of my
+mother's sandy-red cat.  And then the other laugh, which you could hear;
+what a strange laugh that was, never loud, yes, I have heard it tolerably
+loud.  He once passed near me, after having taken leave of a silly
+English fellow--a limping parson of the name of Platitude, who, they
+said, was thinking of turning Papist, and was much in his company; I was
+standing behind the pillar of a piazza, and as he passed he was laughing
+heartily.  O he was a strange fellow, that same red-haired acquaintance
+of ours!
+
+'After we had been at Rome about six weeks our old friend the priest of
+Naples arrived, but without his subordinate, for whose services he now
+perhaps thought that he had no occasion.  I believe he found matters in
+our family wearing almost as favourable an aspect as he could desire:
+with what he had previously taught them and shown them at Naples and
+elsewhere, and with what the red-haired confederate had taught them and
+shown them at Rome, the poor young ladies had become quite handmaids of
+superstition, so that they, especially the youngest, were prepared to bow
+down to anything, and kiss anything, however vile and ugly, provided a
+priest commanded them; and as for the old governor, what with the
+influence which his daughters exerted, and what with the ascendency which
+the red-haired man had obtained over him, he dared not say his purse, far
+less his soul, was his own.  Only think of an Englishman not being master
+of his own purse!  My acquaintance, the lady's maid, assured me that, to
+her certain knowledge, he had disbursed to the red-haired man, for
+purposes of charity, as it was said, at least one thousand pounds during
+the five weeks we had been at Rome.  She also told me that things would
+shortly be brought to a conclusion--and so indeed they were, though in a
+different manner from what she and I and some other people imagined; that
+there was to be a grand festival, and a mass, at which we were to be
+present, after which the family were to be presented to the Holy Father,
+for so those two priestly sharks had managed it; and then . . . she said
+she was certain that the two ladies, and perhaps the old governor, would
+forsake the religion of their native land, taking up with that of these
+foreign regions, for so my fellow-servant expressed it, and that perhaps
+attempts might be made to induce us poor English servants to take up with
+the foreign religion, that is herself and me, for as for our
+fellow-servant, the other maid, she wanted no inducing, being disposed
+body and soul to go over to it.  Whereupon I swore with an oath that
+nothing should induce me to take up with the foreign religion; and the
+poor maid, my fellow-servant, bursting into tears, said that for her part
+she would die sooner than have anything to do with it; thereupon we shook
+hands and agreed to stand by and countenance one another: and moreover,
+provided our governors were fools enough to go over to the religion of
+these here foreigners, we would not wait to be asked to do the like, but
+leave them at once, and make the best of our way home, even if we were
+forced to beg on the road.
+
+'At last the day of the grand festival came, and we were all to go to the
+big church to hear the mass.  Now it happened that for some time past I
+had been much afflicted with melancholy, especially when I got up of a
+morning, produced by the strange manner in which I saw things going on in
+our family; and to dispel it in some degree, I had been in the habit of
+taking a dram before breakfast.  On the morning in question, feeling
+particularly low spirited when I thought of the foolish step our governor
+would probably take before evening, I took two drams before breakfast;
+and after breakfast, feeling my melancholy still continuing, I took
+another, which produced a slight effect upon my head, though I am
+convinced nobody observed it.
+
+'Away we drove to the big church; it was a dark misty day, I remember,
+and very cold, so that if anybody had noticed my being slightly in
+liquor, I could have excused myself by saying that I had merely taken a
+glass to fortify my constitution against the weather; and of one thing I
+am certain, which is, that such an excuse would have stood me in stead
+with our governor, who looked, I thought, as if he had taken one too; but
+I may be mistaken, and why should I notice him, seeing that he took no
+notice of me? so away we drove to the big church, to which all the
+population of the place appeared to be moving.
+
+'On arriving there we dismounted, and the two priests, who were with us,
+led the family in, whilst I followed at a little distance, but quickly
+lost them amidst the throng of people.  I made my way, however, though in
+what direction I knew not, except it was one in which everybody seemed
+striving, and by dint of elbowing and pushing I at last got to a place
+which looked like the aisle of a cathedral, where the people stood in two
+rows, a space between being kept open by certain strangely-dressed men
+who moved up and down with rods in their hands; all were looking to the
+upper end of this place or aisle; and at the upper end, separated from
+the people by palings like those of an altar, sat in magnificent-looking
+stalls, on the right and the left, various wonderful-looking individuals
+in scarlet dresses.  At the farther end was what appeared to be an altar,
+on the left hand was a pulpit, and on the right a stall higher than any
+of the rest, where was a figure whom I could scarcely see.
+
+'I can't pretend to describe what I saw exactly, for my head, which was
+at first rather flurried, had become more so from the efforts which I had
+made to get through the crowd; also from certain singing, which proceeded
+from I know not where; and, above all, from the bursts of an organ, which
+were occasionally so loud that I thought the roof, which was painted with
+wondrous colours, would come toppling down on those below.  So there
+stood I--a poor English servant--in that outlandish place, in the midst
+of that foreign crowd, looking at that outlandish sight, hearing those
+outlandish sounds, and occasionally glancing at our party, which, by this
+time, I distinguished at the opposite side to where I stood, but much
+nearer the place where the red figures sat.  Yes, there stood our poor
+governor and the sweet young ladies, and I thought they never looked so
+handsome before; and close by them were the sharking priests, and not far
+from them was that idiotical parson Platitude, winking and grinning, and
+occasionally lifting up his hands as if in ecstasy at what he saw and
+heard, so that he drew upon himself the notice of the congregation.
+
+'And now an individual mounted the pulpit, and began to preach in a
+language which I did not understand, but which I believe to be Latin,
+addressing himself seemingly to the figure in the stall; and when he had
+ceased, there was more singing, more organ-playing, and then two men in
+robes brought forth two things which they held up; and then the people
+bowed their heads, and our poor governor bowed his head, and the sweet
+young ladies bowed their heads, and the sharking priests, whilst the
+idiotical parson Platitude tried to fling himself down; and then there
+were various evolutions withinside the pale, and the scarlet figures got
+up and sat down; and this kind of thing continued for some time.  At
+length the figure which I had seen in the principal stall came forth and
+advanced towards the people; an awful figure he was, a huge old man with
+a sugar-loaf hat, with a sulphur-coloured dress, and holding a crook in
+his hand like that of a shepherd; and as he advanced the people fell on
+their knees, our poor old governor amongst them; the sweet young ladies,
+the sharking priests, the idiotical parson Platitude, all fell on their
+knees, and somebody or other tried to pull me on my knees; but by this
+time I had become outrageous; all that my poor brother used to tell me of
+the superstitions of the high Barbary shore rushed into my mind, and I
+thought they were acting them over here; above all, the idea that the
+sweet young ladies, to say nothing of my poor old governor, were, after
+the conclusion of all this mummery, going to deliver themselves up body
+and soul into the power of that horrid-looking old man, maddened me, and,
+rushing forward into the open space, I confronted the horrible-looking
+old figure with the sugar-loaf hat, the sulphur-coloured garments, and
+shepherd's crook, and shaking my fist at his nose, I bellowed out in
+English--
+
+'"I don't care for you, old Mumbo Jumbo, though you have fetish!"
+
+'I can scarcely tell you what occurred for some time.  I have a dim
+recollection that hands were laid upon me, and that I struck out
+violently left and right.  On coming to myself, I was seated on a stone
+bench in a large room, something like a guard-room, in the custody of
+certain fellows dressed like Merry-andrews; they were bluff,
+good-looking, wholesome fellows, very different from the sallow Italians:
+they were looking at me attentively, and occasionally talking to each
+other in a language which sounded very like the cracking of walnuts in
+the mouth, very different from cooing Italian.  At last one of them asked
+me in Italian what had ailed me, to which I replied, in an incoherent
+manner, something about Mumbo Jumbo; whereupon the fellow, one of the
+bluffest of the lot, a jovial rosy-faced rascal, lifted up his right
+hand, placing it in such a manner that the lips were between the fore-
+finger and thumb, then lifting up his right foot and drawing back his
+head, he sucked in his breath with a hissing sound, as if to imitate one
+drinking a hearty draught, and then slapped me on the shoulder, saying
+something which sounded like goot wine, goot companion, whereupon they
+all laughed, exclaiming, ya, ya, goot companion.  And now hurried into
+the room our poor old governor, with the red-haired priest.  The first
+asked what could have induced me to behave in such a manner in such a
+place, to which I replied that I was not going to bow down to Mumbo
+Jumbo, whatever other people might do.  Whereupon my master said he
+believed I was mad, and the priest said he believed I was drunk; to which
+I answered that I was neither so mad nor drunk but I could distinguish
+how the wind lay.  Whereupon they left me, and in a little time I was
+told by the bluff-looking Merry-andrews I was at liberty to depart.  I
+believe the priest, in order to please my governor, interceded for me in
+high quarters.
+
+'But one good resulted from this affair; there was no presentation of our
+family to the Holy Father, for old Mumbo was so frightened by my
+outrageous looks that he was laid up for a week, as I was afterwards
+informed.
+
+'I went home, and had scarcely been there half an hour when I was sent
+for by the governor, who again referred to the scene in church, said that
+he could not tolerate such scandalous behaviour, and that unless I
+promised to be more circumspect in future, he should be compelled to
+discharge me.  I said that if he was scandalised at my behaviour in the
+church, I was more scandalised at all I saw going on in the family, which
+was governed by two rascally priests, who, not content with plundering
+him, appeared bent on hurrying the souls of us all to destruction; and
+that with respect to discharging me, he could do so that moment, as I
+wished to go.  I believe his own reason told him that I was right, for he
+made no direct answer, but, after looking on the ground for some time, he
+told me to leave him.  As he did not tell me to leave the house, I went
+to my room, intending to lie down for an hour or two; but scarcely was I
+there when the door opened, and in came the red-haired priest.  He showed
+himself, as he always did, perfectly civil, asked me how I was, took a
+chair and sat down.  After a hem or two he entered into a long
+conversation on the excellence of what he called the Catholic religion;
+told me that he hoped I would not set myself against the light, and
+likewise against my interest; for that the family were about to embrace
+the Catholic religion, and would make it worth my while to follow their
+example.  I told him that the family might do what they pleased, but that
+I would never forsake the religion of my country for any consideration
+whatever; that I was nothing but a poor servant, but I was not to be
+bought by base gold.  "I admire your honourable feelings," said he, "you
+shall have no gold; and as I see you are a fellow of spirit, and do not
+like being a servant, for which I commend you, I can promise you
+something better.  I have a good deal of influence in this place, and if
+you will not set your face against the light, but embrace the Catholic
+religion, I will undertake to make your fortune.  You remember those fine
+fellows to-day who took you into custody, they are the guards of his
+Holiness.  I have no doubt that I have interest enough to procure your
+enrolment amongst them."  "What," said I, "become swashbuckler to Mumbo
+Jumbo up here!  May I . . ."--and here I swore--"if I do.  The mere
+possibility of one of their children being swashbuckler to Mumbo Jumbo on
+the high Barbary shore has always been a source of heart-breaking to my
+poor parents.  What, then, would they not undergo, if they knew for
+certain that their other child was swashbuckler to Mumbo Jumbo up here?"
+Thereupon he asked me, even as you did some time ago, what I meant by
+Mumbo Jumbo.  And I told him all I had heard about the Mumbo Jumbo of the
+high Barbary shore; telling him that I had no doubt that the old fellow
+up here was his brother, or nearly related to him.  The man with the red
+hair listened with the greatest attention to all I said, and when I had
+concluded, he got up, nodded to me, and moved to the door; ere he reached
+the door I saw his shoulders shaking, and as he closed it behind him I
+heard him distinctly laughing, to the tune of--he! he! he!
+
+'But now matters began to mend.  That same evening my young master
+unexpectedly arrived.  I believe he soon perceived that something
+extraordinary had been going on in the family.  He was for some time
+closeted with the governor, with whom, I believe, he had a dispute; for
+my fellow-servant, the lady's maid, informed me that she heard high
+words.
+
+'Rather late at night the young gentleman sent for me into his room, and
+asked me various questions with respect to what had been going on, and my
+behaviour in the church, of which he had heard something.  I told him all
+I knew with respect to the intrigues of the two priests in the family,
+and gave him a circumstantial account of all that had occurred in the
+church; adding that, under similar circumstances, I was ready to play the
+same part over again.  Instead of blaming me, he commended my behaviour,
+told me I was a fine fellow, and said he hoped that, if he wanted my
+assistance, I would stand by him: this I promised to do.  Before I left
+him, he entreated me to inform him the very next time I saw the priests
+entering the house.
+
+'The next morning, as I was in the courtyard, where I had placed myself
+to watch, I saw the two enter and make their way up a private stair to
+the young ladies' apartment; they were attended by a man dressed
+something like a priest, who bore a large box; I instantly ran to relate
+what I had seen to my young master.  I found him shaving.  "I will just
+finish what I am about," said he, "and then wait upon these gentlemen."
+He finished what he was about with great deliberation; then taking a
+horsewhip, and bidding me follow him, he proceeded at once to the door of
+his sisters' apartment: finding it fastened, he burst it open at once
+with his foot and entered, followed by myself.  There we beheld the two
+unfortunate young ladies down on their knees before a large female doll,
+dressed up, as usual, in rags and tinsel; the two priests were standing
+near, one on either side, with their hands uplifted, whilst the fellow
+who brought the trumpery stood a little way down the private stair, the
+door of which stood open; without a moment's hesitation, my young master
+rushed forward, gave the image a cut or two with his horsewhip--then
+flying at the priests, he gave them a sound flogging, kicked them down
+the private stair, and spurned the man, box and image after them--then
+locking the door, he gave his sisters a fine sermon, in which he
+represented to them their folly in worshipping a silly wooden graven
+image, which, though it had eyes, could see not; though it had ears,
+could hear not; though it had hands, could not help itself; and though it
+had feet, could not move about unless it were carried.  Oh, it was a fine
+sermon that my young master preached, and sorry I am that the Father of
+the Fetish, old Mumbo, did not hear it.  The elder sister looked ashamed,
+but the youngest, who was very weak, did nothing but wring her hands,
+weep and bewail the injury which had been done to the dear image.  The
+young man, however, without paying much regard to either of them, went to
+his father, with whom he had a long conversation, which terminated in the
+old governor giving orders for preparations to be made for the family's
+leaving Rome and returning to England.  I believe that the old governor
+was glad of his son's arrival, and rejoiced at the idea of getting away
+from Italy, where he had been so plundered and imposed upon.  The
+priests, however, made another attempt upon the poor young ladies.  By
+the connivance of the female servant who was in their interest they found
+their way once more into their apartment, bringing with them the fetish
+image, whose body they partly stripped, exhibiting upon it certain
+sanguine marks which they had daubed upon it with red paint, but which
+they said were the result of the lashes which it had received from the
+horsewhip.  The youngest girl believed all they said, and kissed and
+embraced the dear image; but the eldest, whose eyes had been opened by
+her brother, to whom she was much attached, behaved with proper dignity;
+for, going to the door, she called the female servant who had a respect
+for me, and in her presence reproached the two deceivers for their
+various impudent cheats, and especially for this their last attempt at
+imposition; adding that if they did not forthwith withdraw and rid her
+sister and herself of their presence, she would send word by her maid to
+her brother, who would presently take effectual means to expel them.  They
+took the hint and departed, and we saw no more of them.
+
+'At the end of three days we departed from Rome, but the maid whom the
+priests had cajoled remained behind, and it is probable that the youngest
+of our ladies would have done the same thing if she could have had her
+own will, for she was continually raving about her image, and saying she
+should wish to live with it in a convent; but we watched the poor thing,
+and got her on board ship.  Oh, glad was I to leave that fetish country
+and old Mumbo behind me!
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER C
+
+
+Nothing but gloom--Sporting character--Gouty Tory--Servants'
+Club--Politics--Reformado footman--Peroration--Good-night.
+
+'We arrived in England, and went to our country seat, but the peace and
+tranquillity of the family had been marred, and I no longer found my
+place the pleasant one which it had formerly been; there was nothing but
+gloom in the house, for the youngest daughter exhibited signs of lunacy,
+and was obliged to be kept under confinement.  The next season I attended
+my master, his son, and eldest daughter to London, as I had previously
+done.  There I left them, for hearing that a young baronet, an
+acquaintance of the family, wanted a servant, I applied for the place,
+with the consent of my masters, both of whom gave me a strong
+recommendation; and, being approved of, I went to live with him.
+
+'My new master was what is called a sporting character, very fond of the
+turf, upon which he was not very fortunate.  He was frequently very much
+in want of money, and my wages were anything but regularly paid;
+nevertheless, I liked him very much, for he treated me more like a friend
+than a domestic, continually consulting me as to his affairs.  At length
+he was brought nearly to his last shifts, by backing the favourite at the
+Derby, which favourite turned out a regular brute, being found nowhere at
+the rush.  Whereupon, he and I had a solemn consultation over fourteen
+glasses of brandy and water, and as many cigars--I mean, between us--as
+to what was to be done.  He wished to start a coach, in which event he
+was to be driver, and I guard.  He was quite competent to drive a coach,
+being a first-rate whip, and I daresay I should have made a first-rate
+guard; but, to start a coach requires money, and we neither of us
+believed that anybody would trust us with vehicles and horses, so that
+idea was laid aside.  We then debated as to whether or not he should go
+into the Church; but to go into the Church--at any rate to become a dean
+or bishop, which would have been our aim--it is necessary for a man to
+possess some education; and my master, although he had been at the best
+school in England, that is, the most expensive, and also at College, was
+almost totally illiterate, so we let the Church scheme follow that of the
+coach.  At last, bethinking me that he was tolerably glib at the tongue,
+as most people are who are addicted to the turf, also a great master of
+slang; remembering also that he had a crabbed old uncle, who had some
+borough interest, I proposed that he should get into the House, promising
+in one fortnight to qualify him to make a figure in it, by certain
+lessons which I would give him.  He consented; and during the next
+fortnight I did little else than give him lessons in elocution, following
+to a tittle the method of the great professor, which I had picked up,
+listening behind the door.  At the end of that period we paid a visit to
+his relation, an old gouty Tory, who at first received us very coolly.  My
+master, however, by flattering a predilection of his for Billy Pitt, soon
+won his affections so much that he promised to bring him into Parliament;
+and in less than a month was as good as his word.  My master, partly by
+his own qualifications, and partly by the assistance which he had
+derived, and still occasionally derived, from me, cut a wonderful figure
+in the House, and was speedily considered one of the most promising
+speakers; he was always a good hand at promising--he is at present, I
+believe, a Cabinet minister.
+
+'But as he got up in the world he began to look down on me.  I believe he
+was ashamed of the obligation under which he lay to me; and at last,
+requiring no further hints as to oratory from a poor servant like me, he
+took an opportunity of quarrelling with me and discharging me.  However,
+as he had still some grace, he recommended me to a gentleman with whom,
+since he had attached himself to politics, he had formed an acquaintance,
+the editor of a grand Tory Review.  I lost caste terribly amongst the
+servants for entering the service of a person connected with a profession
+so mean as literature; and it was proposed at the Servants' Club, in Park
+Lane, to eject me from that society.  The proposition, however, was not
+carried into effect, and I was permitted to show myself among them,
+though few condescended to take much notice of me.  My master was one of
+the best men in the world, but also one of the most sensitive.  On his
+veracity being impugned by the editor of a newspaper, he called him out,
+and shot him through the arm.  Though servants are seldom admirers of
+their masters, I was a great admirer of mine, and eager to follow his
+example.  The day after the encounter, on my veracity being impugned by
+the servant of Lord C--- in something I said in praise of my master, I
+determined to call him out; so I went into another room and wrote a
+challenge.  But whom should I send it by?  Several servants to whom I
+applied refused to be the bearers of it; they said I had lost caste, and
+they could not think of going out with me.  At length the servant of the
+Duke of B--- consented to take it; but he made me to understand that,
+though he went out with me, he did so merely because he despised the
+Whiggish principles of Lord C---'s servant, and that if I thought he
+intended to associate with me I should be mistaken.  Politics, I must
+tell you, at that time ran as high amongst the servants as the gentlemen,
+the servants, however, being almost invariably opposed to the politics of
+their respective masters, though both parties agreed in one point, the
+scouting of everything low and literary, though I think, of the two, the
+liberal or reform party were the most inveterate.  So he took my
+challenge, which was accepted; we went out, Lord C---'s servant being
+seconded by a reformado footman from the palace.  We fired three times
+without effect; but this affair lost me my place; my master on hearing it
+forthwith discharged me; he was, as I have said before, very sensitive,
+and he said this duel of mine was a parody of his own.  Being, however,
+one of the best men in the world, on his discharging me he made me a
+donation of twenty pounds.
+
+'And it was well that he made me this present, for without it I should
+have been penniless, having contracted rather expensive habits during the
+time that I lived with the young baronet.  I now determined to visit my
+parents, whom I had not seen for years.  I found them in good health,
+and, after staying with them for two months, I returned again in the
+direction of town, walking, in order to see the country.  On the second
+day of my journey, not being used to such fatigue, I fell ill at a great
+inn on the north road, and there I continued for some weeks till I
+recovered, but by that time my money was entirely spent.  By living at
+the inn I had contracted an acquaintance with the master and the people,
+and become accustomed to inn life.  As I thought that I might find some
+difficulty in procuring any desirable situation in London, owing to my
+late connection with literature, I determined to remain where I was,
+provided my services would be accepted.  I offered them to the master,
+who, finding I knew something of horses, engaged me as a postilion.  I
+have remained there since.  You have now heard my story.
+
+'Stay, you shan't say that I told my tale without a per--peroration.  What
+shall it be?  Oh, I remember something which will serve for one.  As I
+was driving my chaise some weeks ago, I saw standing at the gate of an
+avenue, which led up to an old mansion, a figure which I thought I
+recognised.  I looked at it attentively, and the figure, as I passed,
+looked at me; whether it remembered me I do not know, but I recognised
+the face it showed me full well.
+
+'If it was not the identical face of the red-haired priest whom I had
+seen at Rome, may I catch cold!
+
+'Young gentleman, I will now take a spell on your blanket--young lady,
+good-night.'
+
+
+
+
+Footnotes:
+
+
+{5}  'In Cornwall are the best gentlemen.'--_Corn. Prov_.
+
+{19}  Norwegian ells--about eight feet.
+
+{143}  Klopstock.
+
+
+
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