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diff --git a/44974-0.txt b/44974-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..28cc759 --- /dev/null +++ b/44974-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1545 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 44974 *** + +Transcriber's Note: Minor typographical errors have been corrected +without note. Irregularities and inconsistencies in the text have +been retained as printed. + +Words printed in italics are noted with underscores: _italics_. + +The cover of this ebook was created by the transcriber and is hereby +placed in the public domain. + + + +A SHORT ACCOUNT OF THE EXTRAORDINARY LIFE + +_AND TRAVELS OF_ H. L. L.---- + +_NATIVE OF St. DOMINGO_, + +NOW A PRISONER OF WAR AT ASHBOURN, _IN DERBYSHIRE_; + + +Shewing the Remarkable steps of Divine Providence towards +him, and the means of his Conversion to GOD. + + Naked came I out of my Mother's womb, and naked shall I return + thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; Blessed be + the name of the LORD. Job. chap. 1 ver. 21 Thy Righteousness is + like the great mountains; thy judgment are a great deep: O LORD, + thou preservest Man and Beast. Psalm. Chap. 36 ver. 6. + +WRITTEN BY HIS OWN HAND. + +ENTERED AT STATIONERS HALL. + +PRINTED AND SOLD BY PARKES ASHBOURN, +BURDITT LONDON, AND PRITCHARD DERBY. + +_Price One Shilling._ + + + + +_OBSERVATION._ + + +It is not doubtful, (_as it is a common method in this world_,) that +my life, and all what is contained therein, will be contradicted and +criticised; but as it hath pleased GOD to reveal unto me the mystery +of the way of the truth, (_of which I hope I am not ignorant_;) +therefore I expect persecutions, contradictions, and criticism to take +place; knowing, that whosoever will live according to the Gospel of +CHRIST, must while in this vale of tears go through much sufferings +and pains: for thus is the road that leads to everlasting happiness. +Therefore let every true born soul know, that as our SAVIOUR suffered +for us: so must we in return for the blessing of Redemption, suffer +for his sake, _for unto us it is given, in the behalf of CHRIST, not +only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake. phi. chap. 1. +ver. 29_. I therefore leave to the public to say what they please of +this book; but the GOD in whom I have trusted shall be the judge of +it. + +Finally, the decisive day of our LORD, will put a determination to all +our works, whether they be acceptable, or not. + + + + +TO THE READER. + + +In reading this little work, (_not only to read but to meditate_,) you +will see the great disappointments that there is in those things, +[_the riches of this world_.] which men put their trust. Oh! reader, +art thou of that unhappy number? if thou art, delay no longer, but go +to JESUS CHRIST, who is the fountain of durable riches, and take with +thee the words of the _Poët_? "whom have I in heaven but thee that can +thy creature bless? what were all the Earth to me, if a stranger to +thy peace? all is vanity but CHRIST, pain and darkness, and dispair, +rankling in a sinner's breast, till thou art present there." Art thou +in prosperity, be Joyful, and praise thy GOD; art thou in adversity, +consider: for GOD hath set the one over against the other, to the end +that man should find nothing after him. Be not as those, which through +weakness of faith, dare not trust their GOD, whensoever in poverty or +distress; for I never knew of any that trusted in GOD, and were yet +confounded; He surely will supply the wants of all those who being +sensible of their sins, groan after him: and lo, (_says CHRIST_) I am +with you alway, even unto the end of the world. + +Read, and read again this book, that thou mightest know, that +wheresoever GOD hath a child, there will his eyes be, and that to +protect him; though he may run to a certain degree of sins and +wickedness, but at last He will snatch him as a bran from the eternal +burning, and let him know, that it is not of him that willeth, nor of +him that runneth, but of his good pleasure to shew mercy. "Oh! had not +GOD shown his mercy to me, where should I have been? in the broad road +that leads to everlasting misery, yea in the dark and dolesome dungeon +of dispair, without a glimmering ray of hope; everlastingly bewailing +my miserable destiny." See how the words of the holy prophet prove +true to my case; "I am sought of them that asked not for me; I am +found of them that sought me not." + +Oh! if ever I am so happy as to reach within a blessed view of the +happy possession of saints, what a debtor shall I be to mercy and free +grace alone; to save such an ungovernable and unwilling creature as I: +"Oh! my soul it is hard for thee to kick against the pricks[1]! thou, +who hast so long despised, rejected, and set at nought the +commandments of GOD, art now through thy SAVIOUR'S obedience and blood +brought to know the way of Salvation." + + [1] I allude this passage to a Ship going straightways + against the wind; for it is no more in the power of a sinner + to resist the will and mercies of GOD, than it is possible + for a Ship to go straightways against the wind. + +Dear reader, art thou a blasphemer, or a despiser of the words of GOD? +if thou art, I will advise thee to take a warning in reading my case, +and to consider about it, for fear thou shouldest be plunged for ever +into eternal misery. Delay no longer to open thy case before the +merciful GOD, though it should be ever so desperate; for He is +all-sufficient, yea all-powerful, to plead the cause of thine immortal +soul, and to bring to pass whatsoever thou shalt commit into his +hands, for He ever liveth to make intercession for sensible[2] +sinners, and to brighten their evidences for the approaching of a +future and everlasting Glory. + + [2] Remember, that GOD makes us sensible that we are + sinners. + +Didst thou ever read, or hear mentioned, of the compassionate +invitation of our blessed SAVIOUR when He lived on Earth; where He +saith, "him that cometh to me (_believing_) I will in no wise cast +out, but I will raise him up at the last day." Perhaps thou say'st in +thine own heart, CHRIST is no more upon the Earth that I might go to +him. Knowest thou not faithless man or woman, that though CHRIST is no +more upon the Earth, that He is the same yesterday, to day, and for +ever; and hath the same power to save and to bring to heaven whom He +will: and now that He is in his holy mansion, is He not still the +same? yea, He is still entreating his Father on our behalf, and his +bowels are always melting in mercy towards us his rebellious Children; +and his most precious arms and pierced hands, which we ourselves have +crucified, are always extended to receive prodigals and backsliders +home: for I am (_says CHRIST_) the friend of sinners, I eateth and +drinketh with them; therefore let him that is athirst come, and take +of the water of life freely. + + _Oh! reader, whoever thou art, I pray GOD through Grace, that + thou and I, might be of that happy and highly favoured number, + that shall sing above with the innumerable legions of blessed + Angels, the chorus of the victory of a wounded and suffering + SAVIOUR. AMEN. H. L. L._ + + + + +INTRODUCTION. + + Ever since the GOD of truth was pleased to open my blind eyes, and + Lead me to the knowledge of the truth, I have often meditated upon + my Life past, and how the divine providence of GOD, has delivered, + and preserved, such a worthless creature as I out of divers + dangers: I therefore think it proper and useful to take my pen, + and give a short account of my Life, and my calling to the + knowledge of the true and living GOD, hoping that by the Blessing + of the Eternal JEHOVAH, it may be made useful to those who Love to + meditate upon the mysterious ways of the wonder working GOD. + + +I was born in the once proud and haughty Island of _St. Domingo_, in +the Parish of _St. Rose_, of Ancient and respectable parents. My +Father and Mother, were the most accomplished union according to their +Religion and ways of worshiping; they were equal in fortune, for they +had each a plantation, when united together made them an exceeding +good livelihood. + +But I have not taken my pen for to write my parents History, but my +own: here then my narration shall begin. In the year one thousand +seven-hundred and eighty-three, the Sixth of September, betwixt eight +and nine o'Clock in the morning I was brought forth into a World of +troubles, and was baptised the twenty-fourth of November in the same +year, by _Father Julien Capuchin Missionary Curate_; and had for +God-father my Mother's Brother, and for God-mother my Father's Sister. + +From the day that I was born, I never enjoyed a good state of health; +for I was so weak and Sickly, that I looked more like a Spectre than a +human creature; for my Death was daily and Hourly expected, in me was +seen the very picture of Death: I was in that situation till I +attained my seventh year; when I was forced to leave a Mother by whom +I was dearly loved, and a Father that cherished me above all earthly +creatures. + +For one Morning I yet very well remember, (_though I did not expect +it_,) my Father called me and my two eldest Brothers also, and lead us +into my Mother's chamber, where I saw her weeping bitterly: when there +I could not help asking her what was the matter that she was crying +so; she made no reply but by sighs and tears; when in a sympathetic +manner she took me up in her arms and pressed me with tenderness to +her bosom and bedewed my innocent face with tears; it was with great +difficulty that she consented to let me go; and then she kissed my +Brothers in the like manner, when we left her to sooth her sorrows, +and to console herself to the loss: in the mean time my Father handed +us into our coach, and gave orders to drive away to Town. + +I was some time silent, effected by this sudden change; when looking +through the window of the coach, I saw both my little Sisters +stretching out their arms as if it were to bid me the last Adieu; the +scene was so affecting, that I could not restrain myself but to ask my +Father where we were going to; (_for I did not know any thing about +that sudden journey_.) He satisfied me, by saying, that he was sending +us into _France_ for our education, and that he would spare no expence +to give us a good one. + +In the afternoon we reached the Town, and alighted at the Crown-Hotel: +my Father being not well in health, we were obliged to delay our +voyage for the space of three weeks; and when the appointed time was +come to separate us from a Father dear and tender, I was taken very +ill, in which state I remained for some days; at the same time the +Captain of the Ship came to let my Father know that he could not wait +any longer, and that he was to weigh Anchor the next day. My Father, +though very ill, said, "well, they shall be ready to go with you +to-morrow." (_I was then but indifferent in health._) + +The most affecting parting took place, he took us by the hand and led +us to the Sea-side where we were to embark, and said, in the most +pathetic manner.--"My most beloved Children! the time is now come that +you must be parted from a Father, by whom you are dearly loved; +receive for the last time from my almost dead lips, the pledge and +tenderness of my love towards you; for I know I shall never live to +see you again, so take the last parting of your Father, for you shall +never see him any more; to day is the last time that you will behold +the Author of your days: my duty forced me to send you into _France_, +and your education will be a friend to you when in distress." + +Before we parted he recommended us to a gentleman that was on board, +and that nothing should be wanted for our care. And then he withdrew, +extending his arms once more towards us in the most distressing +manner: so that we were filled with grief and sorrow to see our Father +in such a melancholy state. + +We begun our course with a fair wind and good weather, which continued +for several days. + +About twenty days after we were upon the Sea, the wind rose with such +violence, that we expected every instant to be cast into the depth of +the Ocean: we was in that situation for a considerable time, till at +last it pleased the ALMIGHTY to appease the waves, and to send fair +weather. We were seventy-two days in crossing the immense Ocean, at +the end of which we landed at _Bordeaux_. Myself and my Brothers were +received with great kindness by our Banker, to whom we delivered the +letter concerning our coming into _France_. + +The next day we were sent to school in the same Town, to give us the +first beginning of education before we could go to College. + +Three months after we were arrived in _France_, we received a letter +sealed in black from our Mother, in which the Death of our Father was +confirmed: his last parting from this World is too cutting to relate. +("_I hope he died happy, and hope to meet him in Glory._") + +Though I was so young, the impression of the Death of my Father +plunged me into such a melancholy state, that soon after I was seized +with a violent fever; no rest was to be found for a long while: in the +strongest of my pain I used to get out of my bed and run about the +chamber like a madman, crying out, "Oh! my Father! my Father is no +more." I was in that state for six months, before my health was +established. + +As my Father's desire was to give us a good education, he told my +Mother when on his Death-bed, that we must be removed as soon as +possible to the College: accordingly we were sent into the South of +_France_, at the distance of two-hundred and twenty miles from +_Bordeaux_, to the College of _Soreze_, one of the most eminent places +of teaching that ever existed since the World began; for every thing, +consisting of Arts and Sciences was to be learned. + +Here is an account of what the College consisted. Teaching Masters, +ninety; besides ten prefects to maintain the police into the yards: +and twelve-hundred scholars. Instruments of Music of all sorts to be +learned; Latin, Greek, German, Spanish, English, Italian, and French +tongues to be learned; Writing of different sorts; Reading, +Arithmetic; Drawing of all kinds, both of Human-likeness, as also the +Landscape: Dancing, both French and English; Ancient History, +Chronology, Literature, Declamation, Fortification, Structure, Poesy, +Rhetoric, Philosophy, Natural History, Geometry, Geography, +Trigonometry, Statics, Fencing, Riding, Military Exercise, Natation, +Architecture, Algebra, Mythology, Theology, Cosmography, &c. + +I took such a delight in learning, that all my Masters were pleased +with my conduct; but this did not last long, for one evening the +Director of the College called me and my Brothers, and said, "here is +a letter from your Mother that I have just received." On opening the +letter I saw these words. + +_My most beloved Children, it is with grief and sorrow, that I took +the pen to inform you of all the misfortunes which have destroyed St. +Domingo; your fortune[3] is lost for ever, it is only in your +Education, that you will be able to recover it: my long silence would +perhaps make you think that I have perished among so many Victims +which were destroyed in that unhappy Island, no! the LORD was pleased +to save me from so many dangers, that I might be useful again to you; +and I hope that by his Mighty Power, He will restore you again to the +bosom of a languishing Mother, whose arms are always open to receive +your tender embraces._ + + [3] Behold, He taketh away, who can hinder him? who will say + unto him, what doest thou? Job. chap. 9. ver. 12. + +_My dear Children, I can hardly hold my pen to inform you of the +gloomy and unhappy end of both your Sisters; they are no more! poison +has put them into the grave: for all the springs and wells were +poisoned, by which perished many others also. Your Uncle and Aunt +P.---- with their Children, in number thirteen, had their heads cut +off upon a block in less than half-an-hour. Your Uncle V.---- was cut +to pieces upon an hedge[4]. A great many of your relations I need not +mention, perished in the most cruel manner: the magnificent City of_ +du Cap-Francais _is burnt down to ashes by the Negroes; no more for +the present Adieu, Adieu, Adieu; my poor unfortunate Children, Adieu. +M. L. F. M. L._ + + [4] Being Persued by the Negroes, and as he was escaping + over an hedge, his Horse alighted; where the Barbarous + Negroes cut him in small pieces with their Swords. + +After reading this letter, the Director said unto us, "my dear little +friends, I am deeply sorry for all your misfortunes, and still more +so, that I am obliged to send you out of the College; but my means do +not permit me to keep you any longer, you must be ready against to +morrow morning, I shall bear the charges of your Travel from hence to +_Bordeaux_: here is a letter for your Banker, that you are to deliver +soon after your arrival thither." + +Never was a sentence more dreadful to me than this; torrents of tears +fell from my eyes; my Heart was almost broken: I was in such a +deplorable situation concerning these sad tidings that I thought I +should never be able to see the returning of the Day. Clouds of +Gloominess hung upon my mind; all the night long no rest was to be +found, neither in mind or body; and was forced to rise up, as I layed +me down. + +We begun our journey in a coach and went as far as _Toulouse_, a City, +where we took a Boat, and finished our voyage by water, and arrived +safe at _Bordeaux_. We went to our Banker, and were received with +great kindness. + +During our residence there, the most atrocious cruelty was exercised +upon the people of the Town[5]; Blood was daily shed by those +barbarous race of Human kind, who cry down Government: nothing was +seen but terror and abomination; the innocent Blood was continually +running under the fatal stroke of the _Guillotine_, and every branch +of Royalty was to be destroyed: being afraid that we should be +apprehended, we were put at an old Dutch Woman's house not far from +our Bankers: there we enjoyed some little comfort, being quite retired +from the World. She being a protestant, (_and our banker likewise_,) +she used to entertain us with a deal of conversation about CHRIST, and +shewed us all the errors of Popery; but all this did not enter into my +mind, because I was always thinking about my unfortunate fate. My +Brothers used to go with her to Chapel, which was just by the house; +but as for me I was so unhappy, that I never could constrain myself to +go; though she used to say, "your happiness that you have lost, will +be found there, if you could take upon yourself to go:" but all this +was quite new to me, and I gave but very little attention to it. I +remained with her till GOD was pleased to put a stop to the sheding of +blood. + + [5] Alluding to the French Revolution. + +About that time I heard that my Aunt V.---- was arrived in Town; I +hurried myself to go and see her: and found that she was married +again, and to a stranger, who received me with the greatest kindness. +He being a man that followed the Tobacco business, made a proposal to +our Banker that we should stay with him as being near relations to us, +which was easily granted: and we began to work with him in his +business. At first he shewed us a deal of kindness, but it soon +vanished away, for he became a tyrant to us, especially against me who +was the youngest: many a time I went to bed with a hungry belly; I +wanted all the necessaries of life, hardly clothes to put on my back, +beaten shamefully; I was the greatest slave that ever lived, for I +used to go to work as soon as it was light, and work till midnight: +many a time I was so harassed and tired, that I used to fall asleep at +my work, and awoke in the same place to begin again my slavery. I was +so tired of that course of life, that I resolved to run away; +accordingly I did, and went to my Banker for protection; but my +pretended Uncle knowing of it, came and told him not to listen to what +I said, that I was a Child and wanted correction. But he said unto +him, "those Children are not yours, they are under my care, and for +that reason I will not have them treated in such a cruel manner; and +am sorry I ever let them go to live with you, but for the future I +hope you will behave better." He promised that he would. + +My Banker bought me a suit of clothes which I took with me, and +followed my barbarous Tyrant. When at home he appeared more reserve, +but for all that, I could perceive in his dissembled face that he +still bore a hatred against me. I was not mistaken, for he soon began +again with me, and threatened to flog me. I rose up from my chair in a +passion filled with despair, and said to him; "I am nothing to you, +neither Child or relation, why should you thus ill use me? if my poor +Father who is now mixed among the dust was alive, he would have taken +my part, and not suffered me to be abused thus by such a Rascally +beggar, and vile Wretch as you are[6]." He flew into such a passion, +that he did not know what to do; till the Devil which was so powerful +in him, excited him to dispatch me to the other World. For that +purpose he seized a long knife[7] which was by, and run towards me to +perpetrate his atrocious deed; but seeing him coming with such +vehemence, I ran under the table, by which he missed his aim and fell +all his length upon the floor: in the mean time both my Brothers +jumped upon his back and were assisted by my Cousin and others, to +take the abominable weapon out of his hands. He was in such a rage +when he was set free, that he frothed like a wild beast. I took the +opportunity while they were with him, to fetch a few of my clothes +which was in the room next to that where he was, and coming again +before his presence with my bundle under my arm, I said, "Brothers +follow me, let this miserable Savage live by himself;" then I run from +the spot and went to my Banker, and gave him an account of every thing +that had passed. He was sorry to hear it, but said, "there is a Ship +that is going to _Guadeloupe_ in the West-Indies, I will send you +there as soon as possible: when there you will perhaps find an +opportunity to join your Mother." + + [6] This was the first time I ever dar'd to contend with + him, but the remembrance of my Father and former state rose + in me such a violent spirit, that I spoke to him with such a + Gloomy tone of voice, that all those that were present could + not help but pity my situation. + + [7] No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper. + Isaiah chap. 54. ver. 17. + +We were made ready for our voyage that was to take place in a few +days; our Banker gave us a draught for one hundred Dollars, on a +merchant in _Guadeloupe_. + +We took leave of him, and thanked him for the care he had taken of us +during our residence in that Country. We began our voyage with a fair +gale of wind, but it soon altered, and we were obliged to cast Anchor +at the mouth of the River, and remained there till the weather was +fair: the eleventh day seeing the weather and wind favorable we +weighed Anchor, no sooner were we under sail, but there rose such a +violent tempest, that we thought our endeavours would have been +without success; for we were surrounded by dreadful rocks, and the Sea +roared with such impetuosity, that it filled our Ship almost with +water. Another Ship that was close by us, was already dashed to pieces +against the rocks. Never was a scene more Gloomy, and cutting than +this; for we had seventy Women and Children passengers on board, which +put Terror into every Heart: nothing was heard but cries and Prayers. +We were in such great dangers that no one had strength to work, and we +left the Ship to GOD's mercy, expecting every minute to share the same +fate as the other Vessel had. The most affecting sight was to be seen, +every soul prostrated upon the deck, calling and exalting their voices +for GOD's merciful protection; till at last a young Man who was a +Passenger[8] started up and taking the helm, said, "my Friends do not +despair, I will be bound to take you out of danger, revive your +spirits, and help me says he, we shall soon get free from the rocks." +So we did, and were relieved from perishing amongst frightful rocks. +But for all that the wind appeased not, for it continued six and +thirty days with great violence, very often we were near to be buried +for ever in the Bowels of the Sea; at last we had fair weather and +wind to proceed on our voyage, and arrived safe at the Island of +_Guadeloupe_ at the end of fifty-six days. + + [8] This passenger was a Captain which understood the + Navigable part of the river. + +After we were Landed, my Brothers and myself went to the Governor for +a pass, to go and join our Mother who was in the +_United-States-of-America_; but the answer he made us was this, "the +Republic is a good Mother, besides that, the Island is besieged, and +we want Soldiers." As we could not get a pass, we went to seek for the +Merchant that the draught was drawn upon, and having found him, we +offered him the bill which he took and payed us generously. + +My eldest Brother being a young man grown up, he made him a proposal +to stay with him as a Clerk, and said that he would satisfy him +according to his behaviour: my Brother accepted his kind offer +willingly. As for me and my other Brother, being too young for any +kind of business, we were recommended to an old Lady who received +us with much humanity; for she maintained us for six months or +thereabouts. In the mean time I began to tire of being without employ, +and acquainted my old benefactress of my disposition, which was to go +upon the Sea and learn to be a Sea-man; she said, "if that is your +resolution, I will recommend you to a Captain that I know;" +accordingly she did, and I went on board of a Privateer as a cabin +boy: and a Clerk's place was provided for my other Brother; so we +began our course of Life in the like manner as it is described. My +rank being a cabin boy as before mentioned, I was to clean the +chamber,[9] wash the dishes, and sweep the deck twice a day. + + [9] Called in Sea terms a Cabin. + +We weighed the Anchor and went a Cruizing: we were a long while before +we took any prize; at last, one morning we saw a Ship, and immediately +we chased her, but all our endeavours were without success, for we +could not attain her though we sailed all the day long; and when night +was coming on the Ship we were chasing tacked about and sailed back +towards us, and when near enough she fired a gun, and made signal to +know what Nation we were; but we did not answer the signal, supposing +she was an English Sloop of war: so we prepared for the conflict. The +enemy seeing that we did not answer their signal, did not doubt any +longer but we were enemies to them; so they came as near as they +could, and fired a broad side: as we were ready for them, we returned +in like manner; and the engagement took place with courage and +obstinacy on both sides; and fought for a long space of time without +knowing what Nation we were fighting with, though we guessed it was +English, but we were not sure of it. At length of time an opportunity +offered itself; we hailed her in English, but no answer, in French, no +answer, in Spanish, and yet no answer was to be had; so we did not +know what to think of their mysterious silence. We renewed the Battle +again with great courage and Boldness, and attempted three times to +jump on board of her; but she always avoided it: our people were so +enraged, that they unanimously cried out, sooner die! than let her go. +We fought like Lions on both sides, from seven o'Clock till midnight, +at which time a misfortune happened on board our Ship; a box full of +cartridges and gunpowder blew up, and set the Ship on fire, which put +disorder among our men. The enemy, joyful to see that spectacle, +(_though dreadful_,) begun to shout aloud, Huzza! Huzza! thinking that +we should soon be theirs, but they were mistaken; our brave Captain, +who was an American, soon put the fire out, by dipping mattresses and +blankets into the Sea, and then quenched it in that manner. We begun +again to dispute the Victory till one o'Clock; and each side being +tired at that time, we took a pause of about half-an-hour; and coming +again to action, the enemy hailed us, "ah! says our Captain, well, we +will be more polite than them, for we will answer though they were not +willing to do it when we hailed them." Accordingly we answered that we +were come from _Demerara_:[10] the enemy was so exasperated at the +answer, that they answered back by saying, "you are a D****d +Liar,"[11] and renewed again the battle with great anger and +intrepidity; the bravery was equal on each part; our deck was covered +with Blood and Dead Bodies; all our rigging was cut off by the +bullets; our Bowsprit, and Fore-top-mast were cut down: the enemy +seemed to be very much damaged, for their Fore-mast and main-top-mast, +with their Bowsprit, were cut down. We were so tired and disordered, +that we were forced to retire on both sides, after a conflict of nine +hours, which was from seven at night till four o'Clock in the morning. +After an hour of rest, we were employed to repair the damages we had +received, and return into harbour; for we were in too bad a state to +stay at Sea any longer. On our journey back we had the good luck to +take two prizes, one came from _Africa_ laden with Negroes, and the +other which was retaken, was come from _Norway_, loaded with gin, +butter, and combustibles &c. We arrived safe in the harbour of +_Point-a-Pitre_ in _Guadeloupe_. + + [10] Though we did not come from that place, we applyed the + untruth as you see above, only that we might deceive them + and pass for an English Ship; for our Ship was a great deal + less then theirs: besides that we were much damaged, both by + the Sea, and by Fighting. + + [11] They were come from Demerara themselves, and they knew + that there was no Ship of war in that Harbour. We heard + after that the name of the Ship was the Pelican, and carried + eighteen Guns of nine Pounders, which were a great advantage + over us, who carried but twelve Guns of four Pounders. + +I went to see my Brothers as soon as I was landed; the eldest was +removed to another place where he thought he could do better, and the +other took example from me, for he was just going out of the Harbour +when I entered in. + +In a few weeks our Ship was entirely repaired, and we ventured again +upon the Sea; our design was to go a cruizing upon the coast of +_Brazil_ to meet with some rich Portuguese Ship. We steered our course +for the appointed place, and met with a deal of contrary wind, and bad +weather; but all this did not discourage us, for we proceeded on our +way with cheerfulness, and now and then a glass of grog to drive away +the care of past sorrows[12]. One day about noon we saw a Ship, and +instantly chased her, we continued the chase till very late at night +before we could come up to her, and when near we hailed, but she +proved to be a dutch vessel, which disappointed us very much: so we +left her to proceed on her voyage because they were not at war with +us. We likewise went further on, and were a considerable time upon the +Sea; till at length we begun to precieve that our provisions were +short, and being a great number of miles from the shore, we were +afraid of being starv'd with hunger; so we made haste to the nearest +land if possible, before we should entirely perish of such a +languishing and hard death, for we were perishing with hunger and +thirst: every moment we expected to be forced to come to that most +horrible and shocking point of eating Human flesh, and become +cannibals for want of food. Many were so weak that they could not +work, nor get up from the place where they lay. We were several days +in that awful and pitiful situation, exposed to all sorts of dangers +and evils; in the most painful of my agonies I swore that if GOD +spared me to put my feet upon Land, I would never go to Sea again. At +last the LORD smiled on us, and spared us once more: a sea-man who was +watching at the top of the mast, shouted, Land! Land[13]. Never was +joy greater in our Hearts than that day, to see ourselves set free +from dangers, and safely landed at that most desirable and appointed +place; and found that it was _Cayen_ near south _America_. + + [12] This is a real Mariners principle. + + [13] In famine he shall Redeem thee from Death. Job chap. 5. + ver. 20. + +The Doctor went immediately on shore to provide food and refreshment, +and ordered that no one should eat any thing without his orders; +because, he said, "some will not be wise enough to content themselves +with a little, and if our bodies which have been void for so long a +time were filled all at once, it would undoubtedly cause our Death." +So we were fed by degrees untill we recovered our former strength. We +remained at _Cayen_ about two months, and then departed to go back to +_Guadeloupe_. + +I was again hardened, and broke the Oath that I had made to GOD, by +going again upon the Sea. About the eighteenth day that we were on the +Sea we saw a Ship, and chased her; in the mean time that we were +chasing, arms were prepared for the battle: and the Captain of +Volunteers called me to take care of the arms which were upon a large +box; so I kneeled down and clip'd a great quantity of pistols and +muskets to prevent them from falling, and all their mouths were fixed +towards my breast. Not long before I was in that posture, the Doctor +who was below called me; I instantly quitted my post and ran to his +orders: no sooner had I left my position in which I was before, than a +pistol went off unexpected, and wounded the Captain of Volunteers in +the knee. I was so surprised at this, that I thought, (_and even was +sure_,) that it was GOD's mercy to spare me; for in the posture that I +was as before mentioned, I could not have escaped being killed upon +the spot[14]. + + [14] He shall deliver thee in six troubles; yea, in seven + there shall no evil touch thee. In famine He shall Redeem + thee from Death; and in war from the power of the sword. Job + chap. 5. ver. 19 & 20. + +The Ship that we were chasing, when near proved to be a large man of +war, and we being too small to attack her, were forced to run away, +and happily escaped. + +I return, to the Captain of Volunteers, whose wound made such a +progress that he was obliged to have his leg, and a part of his thigh +cut off; and I, being assistant to the Doctor, assisted to hold his +leg while he was performing the operation: all that did not prolong +his life many days, for his time was come; he departed eight days +after the amputation. + +We proceeded on our voyage for _Guadeloupe_, and arrived safe there. +Having had so many misfortunes I thought that the Ship was unlucky, +and resolved to go no more with it; so I asked for my discharge, and +it was granted; but before I sought for another place, I inquired +about my Brother who did take pattern by me, and venture to Sea: I +heard that he had had good luck, for he had received fifty pounds +prize money. + +My eldest Brother was in his place still, but a misfortune happened +unto him while I was on shore; the Gentleman and the Lady where he was +at; were at variance on his account, for his Master was jealous of +him, and he was obliged to quit; having nothing to do, he determined +to follow our example; and embarked in the same Ship where my other +Brother was; they wanted me to go with them, saying, "if we perish, we +shall perish in the arms of each other, and if we have good luck, we +can work and live together in union:" but I could not be persuaded, I +wanted to have my own way, for I knew that it was enough for me to +bear my own misfortunes, without adding to those of my Brothers: so +they both took leave of me, and went to seek their fortune. + +A few weeks after their departure I embarked on board of a small +Privateer, carrying only two swivels, and seventeen men: we sailed and +cast Anchor at the Island of _Marie-Galante_, to take some provisions; +and again went out for Sea. Soon after, we met with a large +Merchant-Man; passing by we hoisted an English colour to deceive her, +and having men on board that could speak the English Language +perfectly well, we hailed her; she was come from _Martinico_ and going +to _England_, and had fourteen guns: our Captain said to us, "they +think that we are English, but let her sail on, and when night comes +we will attack her:" so we followed her at a distance, till the time +was come to perform the intrepid design; coming near all was silent, +and every one of our Men were ready to jump on board at the first +signal; and when near enough orders were Given, and our wishes +fulfiled; for we took her with very little resistance, and conveyed +her to _Curacao_, a Dutch Island. The cargo consisted of five-hundred +and fifty-four hogsheads of Sugar, twelve ditto of Coffee, and +eighteen bales of Cotton; which when sold gave every one a prize of +fourteen hundred dollars. Being young and foolish, I soon spent a +great part of my Money with my comrades, in drinking, dancing, +Gambling, &c. + +I was sometimes intoxicated for a whole week, and every night at the +ball room, along with bad company. I was two months in _Curacao_, and +spent five-hundred and forty dollars; after which we proceeded with a +larger Ship, which was ready for Sea, in which we sought for a better +fortune. A few days after we were out, another prize fell into our +hands, which we sent to the place above mentioned; and proceeded on +our Voyage, and went to _Bonaires_, a dutch Island, to take some +refreshment. After we quitted that place, we perceived that our Ship +had a leak, for we had fourteen inches of water in the hold every +hour, which forced us to enter into the Harbour of _Porto-Cabello_, a +large Spanish City on the coast of the _Meridional America_: we were +there two months; and proceeding further, we cast Anchor at +_Cocoa-madrilla_, a Spanish Town on the same coast as before +mentioned, and remained there but a few days: we went out and cruized +for a long while, and having captured no Ships we went into the +harbour of la _Guaires_, another Spanish City, to take some provision, +for we were short of them. + +During our stay there the Lieutenant of the Ship and two men went to +take a walk on shore, and were taken up, and put in the inquisition, +because they did not bow to the HOST: for as it was related to us by +them, that when they were passing through the streets they saw a great +procession of Clergymen, going with a large silver Cross, to give the +Extreme-Unction to a sick person; they not knowing the rules of the +Country, passed by, and took no notice: when they were examined, and +found under French colours, the inquisitioner could do nothing at +them, but release them. + +We went out of that abominable Harbour with the design to go back to +the happy Island of _Guadeloupe_. + +On our way back we took two prizes, but were retaken again; so we went +and cast Anchor at _St. Martin_, a French and Dutch Island, and were +but a few days there; and straightway we sailed for _Basse-Terre_ the +Capital City of _Guadeloupe_, and from thence to _Point-a-Pitre_, +where I Landed my little treasure which consisted of one hundred and +twenty pounds; as I had a Cousin there who was a sober man, I +deposited the money in his hands to begin a small trade; and I was +determined not to go on the Sea for a long while, as I thought my +money would suffice me to live in a decent manner; when I was just +going to begin trade, my Cousin was taken very ill of the putrid +fever, and was in great danger of his life. One day he called me, (_he +was then very ill_,) and said, "I have lent the money that you have +deposited in my hands, to Mrs. Pero[15]:" I said, very well, you are +wise enough to know what you do? he said do not fear, the money is in +good hands. I did not care much about him lending my money, because I +knew that he was too good to do me any injury; but growing worse every +day, I began to be afraid; and was going to speak to him to inquire +whether had Mrs. Pero given him a receipt or not, I was prevented by +her, saying, "he wants some repose and you must not disturb him." She +knew too well the matter, or she would not have prevented me speaking +to my Cousin: she was nights and days watching in his room for fear I +should speak to him. I had no witness who could testify whether she +had given him a receipt or not: and was so tormented in mind about it, +that I did not know what to do, till I saw he was dying, when I +resolved to go into the next chamber where his trunk was, and look in +to it if I could find any paper concerning my money: at the time I was +looking into the box, she came in, and said, "what are you looking +for?" a receipt I said, Madam? she knew then what I meant, and said, +"do not be afraid, I have got your money, and you shall have it back +again, whether your Cousin live or die." I was a little reconciled by +what she said, but she took care that no one was present when she said +it: and the day after my Cousin breath'd his last. + + [15] She kept a linen drapery shop where he boarded and + lodg'd. + +I was very much affected at the Death of so near a relation, and went +in the Country for a month to alleviate my sorrows: when I returned to +Town, I went and asked her for my money, that I wanted it to begin +some business: she said I will satisfy your request. And went to her +desk, she brought me five and twenty Portugueses[16] which she laid on +the table, saying, "this is the remainder of your money, here is a +bill[17] of what I have paid for your Cousin." I took the bill and +read it: there was so much for physic, and the Doctor's trouble, for +board and lodging, for the funeral, and for goods of different sorts, +&c. It was the most shameful bill I ever saw; I began to fly into a +passion, saying "this bill does not concern me at all, besides, I am +not compelled to pay the debts of my Cousin." She then began to grin, +saying, "if you are so impudent and insolent you shall have nothing at +all, because I am ignorant whether the money was yours." I was so +irritated that I thought my anger would have choaked me, I did not +know what to do, having neither attestation nor receipt; so I was +forced with great reluctance to take the five and twenty Portugueses, +and to leave the rest to her. + + [16] A Gold coin worth thirty-six shillings. + + [17] It was a forged one as I heard after, as the Doctor did + not charge any thing for his trouble. + +With the little I had I bought some goods, and went to _St. Croix_, an +Island belonging to the Danes, where I sold my little Cargo, and got +double of my money: and after I had settled my business there, I went +to _St. Thomas_, an Island belonging to the same, and there I +purchased some other goods to go back to _Guadeloupe_, when there, I +sold them for three times as much as they cost me: seeing fortune +smiled on me, I took courage, and bought goods with all the money I +was worth; but not being well enough in health to undertake the +voyage, I trusted a friend with my business: he went to _St. Thomas_ +again, and sold the goods at a very good price, and some others were +purchased for to return; when only three miles from the Harbour where +he was to land, he was taken by the enemy; which ruined me totally. I +was then worth nearly three-hundred Pounds, but all was lost. + +I now began to look for another kind of business, and was recommended +by some of my friends to a Gentleman, (_a planter_,) to be his Clerk, +and to look over his plantation; but did not remain long there, though +I performed my duty with zeal, and was loved as their own child; the +reason was, I could not be happy from the Sea, though I knew it was +very dangerous. I acquainted my Master of my thoughts; he told me to +go and try again, and if I had not good luck to come back to him; for +says he, "my house shall always be open for you." I took my leave of +him, and went again upon the roaring Ocean, seeking after the fortune +of this World: on our way we cast anchor at _Desirada_, an Island not +far from _Guadeloupe_, and stay'd there only a few days. After we +departed from the Island forementioned, we were some time without +seeing any vessel, but one morning we saw a large Ship, which we soon +perceived was an English Frigate; we lost no time, but put all the +sails out to make our escape if possible. We were almost out of sight +of the enemy, when the greatest misfortune happened unto us; our mast +being too much loaded with sails, and the wind being very high, by +which cause the mast broke, and fell down. Having neither mast nor +sails to effect our escape, we were obliged to stay where we was, and +were taken prisoners. We were well treated by the enemy while we +stayed on board their Ship; and were afterwards landed at the Island +of _Martinico_, and put under close confinement in a prison Ship. +Being the first time I ever was confined, I was plunged into a gulf of +despair and grief; every day I was scheming how I should make my +escape, till at last I found a way for my purpose; and guided by +resolution, was determined to fulfil my scheme. It was the ninth day +after my confinement, when I, and two others escaped from prison, by +breaking an iron bar which fastened the port-hole, and letting +ourselves down into the Sea by the means of a rope: we swam about half +a mile before we could reach the shore; having gained the land, I +wrung my clothes, which consisted only of a shirt and trousers: we +began our journey through a great shower of rain, and when passing +through the town, the sentry called? we immediately ran away as fast +as we could for fear of being taken again; but the third of our band +being left behind, was taken again; and I, and my comrade proceeded on +through brambles and briers all the night long; and when the sun was +beginning to spread its beams upon the surface of the Earth, we +entered into a thicket to hide ourselves, and take a little rest: +while I rested myself my comrade watched, and so on by turns till the +approach of night, which enabled us to pursue our way through its +gloomy shadow. + +Being excessively harassed by fatigue and hunger, we endeavoured to +see whether we could find some wild fruit to satisfy our inward wants, +but all our efforts were in vain, for nothing was to be found through +the darkness of the night; and as morning was coming on apace, we +retired to an adjacent wood. In the pitiful and perishing situation in +which we were, I could not help but lament my deplorable fate and +condition; when on a sudden I felt for the first time, a glimpse of +the love of GOD, and many ideas came into my mind such as this? rely +on GOD, and He will help thee, and stand by thee. With all these +thoughts I fell upon my knees, and began to pray in the midst of the +wood, saying, as well as I could. + +"Now, O! GOD that I am in distress I call upon thy power and goodness, +because I know that there is no other that can alleviate my pain but +thou. O! GOD, though I am in trouble, yet I feel that it is good for +me to be so, for I have a comforter to fly to; but forgive me that I +have liv'd so long without doing the duty which I ought to have done +towards thee, for it was nothing else but the pleasures of this +perverse World which banished me from thee, and my misery and trouble +has drawn me near unto thee: do help me, and guide my steps that I may +fall into no dangers, and bring me safe back to the land where I come +from; and with thy help O! GOD, I vow to serve thee according to my +knowledge all the days of my life here on Earth, and hope to praise +thee above when time shall be no more." AMEN. + +I did not quit my position till I thought I had full assurance that +GOD would protect me under all my troubles and trials. + +As night was drawing nigh, we began our nocturnal journey as usual. +Two days and nights were gone without having tasted either food or +rest; when passing through a Village, an old Woman who was sitting +before the door of her house, called us: I did not know whether I +should go or not, but I said to the comrade of my misfortunes, let us +go and see what she wants. Coming near to her, she said, "I know my +friends that you are deserters from prison? be not afraid I will do +you no harm, knowing what it is myself, for my Son is a prisoner in a +French Country, and I should not like that any one should ill use him +if he was in the same case as you are now." She questioned us upon +many subjects concerning the state of her Son, and at last she said, +"I think you must be wanting of food, since you left prison?" I +answered that for two days we had not had any: immediately she went +into the house, and beckoned us to follow her. Being in the house she +told us to sit down, while she dressed some meat, which she did with +great dexterity: and presenting the same to us, I said, "O GOD! since +thou hast been pleased to provide food for us this night, bless it we +beseech thee with thine own power and will." AMEN. + +The old Woman was much pleased to hear what I had said; and after we +had satisfied our wants, she gave us some more meat tied up in a +cloth, and shewed us the road that led to _St. Peter's_ Town: we +thanked her for all her kindness, and proceeded on our march all the +night long until morning, which forced us as usual to retire into some +thicket or wood: there I began to thank GOD for having preserved us +from dangers and pursuits till the present moment; I then took the +cloth which contained our provision: having spread it, I called upon +GOD to give his blessing. My comrade said, "you pray too much, do you +think that GOD takes notice of what you say?" surely said I, because, +if He did not take notice of what I said and asked him, He would not +have provided for us: well says he, "all your nonsense will bring +nothing but bad luck." + +After we had refreshed ourselves, I tied up carefully the remainder of +our food, and said to him, if you desire to take a little rest, I will +watch in the mean time: he did so, and when asleep, I went a few yards +further and rested myself in prayers, for they were the best +refreshment I ever could take; after my duty was performed, I was easy +and full of an unknown joy which I could not describe. + +Some time after my comrade got up and told me to rest myself and he +would watch his turn; but I told him that I was not wearied, and it +would be better to search the wood, to see whether we could find any +fruit; he agreed with my proposal, and we went seeking for some +provisions, for ours were getting very short: after a long while +rambling up and down, we found at last a great quantity of wild fruit +of all sorts, some of them were very pleasant to the taste; we +gathered as much as we could carry, and as it was already dark, we +came out of the wood and travelled on as usual. We were several nights +and days rambling up and down in the greatest misery, till at last one +night we arrived at _St. Peter's_ Town: there I, and my comrade +parted. I went on board of an Irish Ship which was in the Harbour, and +he on board of another. I was well received on board of the Ship, but +as I was very hungry and having had no refreshment for some time, I +told them my situation; and they gave me some food. I was after +introduced to the Captain, who told me that I might stay in the Ship +and work with the other men: I was about three weeks on board working +very hard, and receiving very ill treatment. One day a Negroe came on +board about some business, and I asked him many questions about the +people of the Town, and especially about two Gentlemen which I +perfectly knew; one was a Knight, and the other a Baronet. I sent by +the Negroe a few lines to them, and as soon as they received them, +they hurried to come to see me: they were struck at the first sight to +see me in such a deplorable situation, as they knew my parents, they +could not help but mourn and pity my miserable state: they told me to +go with them on shore, which I did with great pleasure, though I was +ashamed of myself being very dirty. Arrived at their house I was put +into a bath to wash me, for I had need of it; and clothes were +provided for me: after I was dress'd I could not believe that it was +the unhappy me, when looking at my ragged clothes which I had on but a +few minutes ago; I was in a perfect state of happiness, for nothing +concerning the necessaries of life was wanting for me. I was in that +state of affluence for three months, and wheresoever they went, they +took me with them, so that I was acquainted with the best company of +the Town: but for all that I did not forget my GOD. + +Some time after they procured me a passage on board a Ship that was +going to _St. Thomas_: all necessaries, both for life and body were +provided for me, and ten guineas which they gave me when we parted, +also letters of recommendation. + +We went out of the Harbour and sailed towards _Dominica_, where we +cast Anchor to take some passengers, and from thence we sailed to _St. +Kits_, where a part of the convoy were waiting for us, after to _St. +Bartholomew_, for some other business, and from thence to _St. +Thomas_, where we arrived safe after a good voyage. + +I went to the Gentlemen for whom I had letters of recommendation, and +was received with great civility and kindness; one of them took me to +his house while I stay'd at _St. Thomas's_. The first Sunday I went to +Church with him and another Gentleman that I did not know, and that +same Gentleman said to me after we came out of Church; "I hope you +love GOD, young man?" I said yes, well, said he, "in all your troubles +trust to the LORD JESUS CHRIST, and whatsoever you stand in need off, +ask it in his name, and I am sure He will grant it unto you, for He +has promised through _His Blood_ to make intercession for us." I +kindly thanked him for his instruction, and he withdrew. + +I remained at _St. Thomas_ three weeks, and took an opportunity of +going to _Guadeloupe_; but before I took leave of the Gentleman where +I was at, I thanked him for all his goodness: he said, "you are +welcome to stay longer if you chuse;" I returned him my thanks saying, +I wished to see _Guadeloupe_. "Here is a purse (_says he_,) which I +beg your acceptance of;" then shook hands with me, and retired, he one +way, and I the other. I immediately went on board, and in a few +minutes were out of sight of the place where I received so much +kindness. I had a pleasant and short voyage, and safely landed at that +most desired Island of _Guadeloupe_. I hasted to see my acquaintances; +and having inquired after my Brothers, I heard that they were taken +prisoners, and conducted to _Plymouth_ in great _Britain_. + +As I had nothing do and no desire to go to Sea any more, I went again +to my late master (_the Planter_:) who was very glad to see me, and +encouraged me by raising my wages, which made me apply the more to my +business. + +As I did not yet forget my Maker, I daily performed my duty towards +him who had been so gracious unto me. My master (_or rather my +friend_,) soon perceived a great change in me, which he did not know +what to attribute it to; at last he knew by some of the servants who +watched me, that I was in the ways of Christianity: some times he used +to plague me about it, for fun, but for all that he did not esteem me +the less. + +One day having some company at home, that were invited to spend two or +three weeks with us; I retired as usual after supper to bed, and knelt +down: at the time I was pouring out my soul unto GOD in prayers, a +young lady inadvertently passed by, and seeing my chamber door half +open, stepped in; and finding me in the posture as before mentioned, +she bursted into a loud laugh and rushed out of the room, and in a few +minutes I had the whole company round me making all sorts of jests, +some laughing till they fell down on the floor, others holding their +sides with laughing, and others jumping and stamping, &c. It was +indeed such a noise as I never heard before, for it was both a +tragedy, and comedy. In all that disturbance I was as firm as a rock, +and did not move from the place in which I was, untill I had fulfilled +my duty towards my SAVIOUR. I told them it was very unmannerly to +disturb me thus, in my most precious time: for prayers were my best +delight and comfort, and without them I could not rest nor be happy. +The tale soon spread in the neighbourhood about me being a devout,[18] +so that I was persecuted daily by my own friends, but as I did not +mind them, they were soon tired, and at last were obliged to let me be +quiet, seeing they could not get master over me. + + [18] In England, if any profess Christianity, he is called a + methodist, and in France or any other dominions appertaining + to the same, a Devout. + +Three weeks after that scandalous scene, I was taken very ill, of the +putrid and malign fever; three days after the Doctor gave me up, for I +was so ill that he thought I could not recover. + +I was ten days and nights senseless; and saw wondrous things in my +agony; and the eleventh day I came to myself again: my keeper said to +me, "I hope you have prayed enough this time?" I did not know what she +meant, but having asked her the reason why; she said, all the time I +was senseless, I did nothing else but pray night and day untill I came +to my senses again. I was a long time before I could recover my former +strength again; and as soon as I was able, I went to my business. I +then was melancholy with thinking about my Country, and Mother; as for +my Mother I did not know in what quarter of the world she was in; +notwithstanding that, I took my pen and wrote, first, to _St. +Domingo_, and then to two or three other places where I thought most +likely, but all was without success, for no answer was to be had. +Again I wrote, and so on for about eighteen months without receiving +the least tidings: which made me some how think that my poor Mother +was no more. I was in such a low state of mind that my life became a +burden to me, I could not find any comfort either in amusement or +prayer; and when at prayer, I prayed not with such a delight as I used +to do: so that in a short time I quite turned my back from the path of +the truly and most blessed LORD JESUS CHRIST, and became again as +wicked as ever. + +One day my master called me, and said, "the Negroes are in rebellion, +and you must go to war and fight." He provided horse and arms for me, +and sent me to join the cavalry that were encamped at a little +distance from where we lived. Some days after I was at the camp, the +Captain ordered me to go into the Town to carry some dispatches; I +made some excuse, telling him to send some others; but he said, "you +are appointed to go and you must for I dare not trust any other." I +obeyed and went out of the camp, and rode to Town which was nine or +ten miles distance from the place above mentioned; and not being able +to return the same day, I waited till morning: but what was my great +surprise at the moment I was putting my foot in the stirrup to return? +an alarm was given that the whole camp were murdered in the night,[19] +except one who escaped having on nothing but his shirt. We being the +only persons that were spared, we were put into another company, and +marched on the same day against the rebels, and were successful in all +our attempts. I was for three weeks night and day fighting, some times +wet through with rain, and at other times suffocated with the heat: +all that while, I never knew what it was to lay down or take rest; +neither having an opportunity to put clean linen on: but at last we +returned into the Town, where we took some refreshment and put clean +linen on, for we had need of it. No sooner was I refreshed, but I was +ordered to carry some letters of consequence to a camp nine miles off; +but as the road was very dangerous, I asked one of my comrades to go +with me, which he did with great pleasure; we arrived at the camp +without the least injury or danger: but it was not with the same luck +we went back, for as we were passing through a dark Wood, (_it was +then between ten and eleven o'Clock at night_,) a shower of musket +balls were fired at us, which unexpected noise and hissing, so much +frighted our horses, that it was impossible for us to lead them; they +rushed through brambles and briers, and at last plunged into a dead +Lake, where we had like to have been drowned; but our horses being +stout animals, they swam and gained the other side in a few minutes. +We made the best of our way through woods and thickets to escape the +fury of the balls which were continually flying about us, and after +having wandered a great while through unpracticable places, we found +again the road, and rode as fast as we could to the Town: since that +affair I have been in many obstinate and bloody engagements. + + [19] Oh! reader consider and meditate? see how GOD was + pleased to spare such a rebellious Creature as I; and how + Divine Providence distinguished itself by calling me alone, + though I, with obstinacy refused to comply to its orders: + but who can resist the power of the LORD when he says, I + will and they shall, &c. "Oh! bless the LORD O my soul, and + all that is within me, bless his holy name: for the LORD has + done wondrous things. He has lifted me up, and has not made + my foes to rejoice over me." + +One day as I was reading the news-paper, I heard that _St. Domingo_ +was in a state of tranquillity; at this I was determined to go +thither: accordingly, I went on board a Ship that was going there; we +went first to _St. Thomas_, to take some passengers, and for my dear +Country we sailed, and arrived safe there. My first inquiry was my +Mother; I was about two days rambling through the streets without +hearing any tidings respecting her or any other relations; till at +last peradventure I met with one of my Cousins that was in _France_ at +the time I left that Country; she took me to her house and entertained +me with loving kindnesses; and told me that my Mother was in the +Spanish part of _St. Domingo_, at the distance of sixty miles from the +place where I then was. + +Anxious to see the author of my days, I would have set out +immediately, but she entreated me to spend a week or two with her, to +which I agreed: we related to each other our misfortunes, and soothed +each other's sorrows. Once in my conversation I was speaking of that +barbarous and pretended Uncle of mine, who used me so ill when I was +in _France_; I asked her whether she knew where he was, she told me +that he was in the Town, and not far from the house; I was indeed +amazed that such a wretch was still alive; she told me also that he +came some times to see her; well, said I, if he comes I will be ready +for his reception, for I am no more what I formerly was, [_a Child_,] +that I should dread him. Two days after, he heard that I was in Town, +and came to see me: as soon as he came into the house, my mind was +struck with horror. He advanced towards me and asked how I did +stretching forth his hand to shake hands with me; I refused my hand +and said, Sir, I do not shake hands with people that I know not. "why +(_said he_) don't you know me?" no Sir! I replied: "why don't you know +your Uncle S?" no Sir! I never had any relation of that name: "why +don't you remember you lived in _France_ with me?" no Sir! for I am +sure I never saw you before to day, if I did, my mind does not afford +me the recollection of your features: "how is it you don't remember +me, who married your Aunt V.---- in second wedlock?" "Oh! yes I do now +you execrable villain; retire from my presence, monster of iniquities; +think not that you shall go unpunished, nor escape the wrath of GOD, +for the sword of vengeance hangs over your head, and will crush you to +atoms in an unexpected time that justice may be satisfied." He first +blushed, then became pale, and without replying left the house; and I +saw him no more while I tarried there. My Cousin was very much pleased +with my reception of him; but as the time I agreed with her was +expired, I thought of going to see my Mother; so I took leave of her +and embarked in a long-boat which was going that way: in four and +twenty hours I was landed at _Moutechristo_ where she resided, and was +not long to find out the place of her dwelling, the Town being small. +I will just let my reader know how I made my entrance: first, I +knock'd at the door; when in, I asked her whether she knew me; she +said no Sir; I asked her again whether she had not Children abroad; +she said yes, "but, [_giving a deep sigh_,] all my hopes are vanished, +for it is between thirteen and fourteen years since I have seen or +heard from them." I then said to her, behold the youngest of them +before you: she exclaimed in a transport of joy, "Oh! my Son is it +you? my dear H.---- is still existing?" and then fainted: but was not +long in that state, for her exceeding joy soon called her to her +senses again. My hard heart was melted in an instant; I could no +longer withstand that filial love; I threw myself into those arms +which were so desirous and eager to welcome me to that breast which +was so ardently panting for me: our joy was so great on both sides, +that neither of us could utter a word. Our language was only by sighs: +and those precious tears which bedewed my face when I first parted +with her, were once more mixed with mine. Our arms interwove in each +other as an emblem of the most affecting tenderness. In that posture +we remained a long time, so much were our feelings affected, that we +could not utter a single word. + +Some time afterwards, she shewed me my little Brother and Sister, by +her second husband; and dispatched my Brother to go and fetch my +Father-in-law who was then at the farm, a little distance from the +Town. In the mean time she said to me; "your Father-in-law is an +honest man? he is not like many others, but he is a true Father that I +have met with for you;" she then asked me where my Brothers were; I +told her they were taken prisoners by the English and conveyed to +England: at the same time my Father-in-law came into the house, which +interrupted our conversation. He seemed to be very joyful of my +arrival, and treated me with the greatest kindness. This was the +happiest moment I ever enjoyed, being in the bosom of my friends. But +all this happiness did not last long, for the Negroes rose up again, +and killed every white man that fell into their hands. + +I was then compelled to stand in my own defence, as a foot soldier; +every night, alarms were given, for the blacks were at the gates of +the Town: but having received reinforcement, they were repulsed. +Afterwards I was sent to garrison, fifteen miles off, where I stay'd +four and twenty days; at my return my little Brother fell sick of the +fever, and died in two days after; which put my Mother and +Father-in-law in such distress of mind, that I thought they would have +followed, especially my Father-in-law, for he was a man of very tender +feelings: but by degrees and length of time, their griefs were +dispersed. + +Five months were expired since my arrival at my Mother's. I was daily +upon guard, or doing some other things respecting the warfaring +business. One day being on guard, I was informed of the arrival of +both my Brothers; I immediately ran home, and found it was so; my joy +was inexpressible at the sight of them, particularly at the eldest, +who was, and always has been my most intimate friend: it was then five +years and some months since they were taken prisoners; during that +time I never heard from them, which made me think many times that they +were no more in this World. Soon after, the report of their arrival +was spread in the Town; and coming to the ears of the commander of the +place, they were sent for by his orders, and enrolled[20] them into a +company of foot soldiers. The duty was hard, the rebels being daily +about us, and almost every night there was some fighting or attempt. +One day after a very bloody engagement that was fought at the advanced +post, I was sent thither with the company which I was in to reinforce +them, in case they should be attacked again: I stay'd there four and +twenty days, and was relieved by my eldest Brother. The day after I +took leave of him, and returned into the Town. As soon as I arrived, +my Mother sent me to the Metropolis about some business. When there, +the troubles were so great, that no one was in safety of their lives: +three days after my arrival, a strong battle took place, and lasted +from four o'Clock in the morning till six in the evening. The day +after I was occupied in doing the errand for my Mother; and as soon as +I had done, I wrote a letter to her, sending an account of all the +business; and told her she must not expect me to return, nor perhaps +see me more; telling her my reason was, that _St. Domingo_ was a place +too dangerous for me to remain in any longer: and told her not to be +uneasy about me, for I had already taken shipping. + + [20] May it please GOD to enrol them in the Royal Regiment + of Saints, commanded by his most truly and Honorable Son, + the LORD JESUS CHRIST. + +We set out the 3d of May 1803, from the harbour of _St. Domingo_: I +bid my distressed Country once more Adieu; thinking to myself it is +perhaps the last. + +My intention when I embarked was, to go to _St. Malo_, and take +shipping there for the coast of _Africa_. I had on board a small cargo +consisting of Sugar and Coffee, which when sold would have enabled me +to begin a trade according to my purpose. We steered for the place +above mentioned; six days after we were at Sea, we had such a rough +wind, that we were obliged to reef our main and fore top-sails: all +our efforts seemed to be unsuccessful, for we were driven amidst +dreadful Rocks; and the winds redoubled with such violence that +nothing was seen before our eyes but terrors; every moment we expected +our fatal end to take place; we fired guns of distress from time to +time hoping that some Ship would hear us and come to our assistance, +if there was any about: but our endeavours were in vain, and we were +cast in the midst of the Rocks. The scene is too cutting for me to +relate it in all its parts, for it was enough to unman the stoutest +Sailor: every man was in the most profound consternation; nothing was +seen before our eyes but Death, and that in dreadful forms. At every +instant pieces of timber were swimming about the almost wrecked Ship; +the water covered almost the deck. We were in that deplorable +situation till morning; and to our great joy, a Ship offered itself to +our view[21]; we immediately put the long-boat out to Sea, to go to +the Ship for refuge: I flung myself into the boat with what I valued +most, and five other men did likewise. As our boat was too small to +carry all the people, several were obliged to remain upon the wreck of +the Ship, till we could return with the other Ship's boat to save +them. We rowed away the boat, and went to the Ship that was in view; +when there, the Captain asked me if all the people were come; I told +him no, because our boat was too small to carry them, and we came to +beg his assistance, for those miserable Creatures which are now upon +the remainder of the wreck. He said, "they may save themselves if they +can, but as for me I cannot go, the weather is too favorable for me to +lose a minutes time; you may go back if you like to save them; but as +for me, I will go my way." So he sailed, and we went with him; the +others remained upon the wreck of the Ship, in the midst of a wide +Ocean, without either help or hope. The Ship which saved me was a +French Ship, and steered for his own place. + + [21] When thou passest through the waters, I will be with + thee. Isaiah. chap. 43, ver. 2. + +The 21st day of June 1803, being at Sea, we were met by an English +Vessel who told us that war was declared between _France_ and +_England_, and for that reason we were taken prisoners, and conducted +to _Plymouth_. + +I stay'd 35 days in _Plymouth_, and was sent after to _Tiverton_ in +_Devonshire_ upon _Parole_ of _Honour_; there I remained five months, +and was sent afterwards to _Ashbourn_ in _Derbyshire_. I arrived at +_Ashbourn_ the 17th of december 1803, and was in such a deplorable +state of mind, that I did not know what to do. Very often the public +house was the place where I went to seek comfort, by getting +intoxicated, and then casting all my sorrows behind me; I after awhile +took such a delight in this course of life, that it became quite an +habit to me; I was the greatest Sabbath breaker that ever existed; I +was daily fighting or swearing the most execrable Oaths, which was +enough to excite the anger of GOD against me. One morning being half +drunk, I went out to take a walk; when passing through a dark foot +path, I was persuaded by some evil spirit to put an end to my +miserable life. For that purpose I went into the darkest part of the +place, and took my knife out of my pocket to accomplish the horrid +deed.--The instrument was already lifted up, and the stroke was to +ensue; but an Angel of the LORD, (_or some thing of that kind_,) +stopped my rebellious hand, and my weapon dropped from it; then many +ideas came into my mind such as these, "Oh! miserable wretch, art thou +going to plunge thyself into eternal misery? remember thou art going +into Hell head-long, if thou dost such a thing:" I was struck with +terror with those ideas, and was so frighted, that I durst not move +from the place for fear that the justice of an avenging GOD should +fall upon me. I stay'd in that place for some time, and went home with +such a burden, that I could hardly bear: having my head cast down as +if I was a criminal, for I durst upon no account lift it up. + +I was for several days in a such distressed state of mind, that I had +not courage enough to go out; for I thought every body knew what was +the matter with me; and to appease my wounded conscience, I thought +that a reformation would have been sufficient to justify me in the +sight of GOD: so that I began to build, as it is said upon a sandy +foundation, by performing a few formal duties; thinking that by my +good works, I should merit the favours of GOD so as to forgive me all +my trespasses. The plan I had formed was this: having a Roman Catholic +prayer book, I thought it was all-sufficient to calm my troubled +breast, and to bring me to a perfect state of happiness. So every +night and morning I used to kneel down, and taking the prayer book I +read the morning and evening prayer; this performance I thought would +please GOD, and get me from under the terrors of an accused +conscience: but in all these vain duties I never looked to JESUS for +forgiveness or remission of sins, neither to his precious and +cleansing blood, nor could I perceive the depravity of my corrupted +nature: but I depended wholly upon my best endeavours and good works. +I continued but a little time in doing those erroneous duties, and +felt insensibly at last that all my fears were vanished away; I was +like the dog, returning to his vomit again: for I begun the same +method as before, keeping all sorts of bad company, and breaking the +sabbath with drinking, swearing and fighting &c. I was at the least +five days drunk in the week, and always quarrelling. + +One day in one of my mad fits, (_though I was not drunk_,) I resolved +to delay no longer to put an end to my miserable existence; for that +purpose I went into a garden near by: the same instrument that had +been lifted up before, was again employed; I was in such great +despair, that I was relentless towards my own life and happiness; so +that I lifted up my sanguinary hand and struck my left breast +twice[22].--I fell down senseless; some persons who were near, hearing +the exclamation I made, which was, Oh! Mother, I shall never see thee +again! came to see what was the matter; and to their great surprise, +found me wallowing in my own blood. They carried me into my room for +dead, and some person went to fetch the Doctor. As soon as the Doctor +saw my wounds, which were through my lungs, he said, I can be of no +use to him, for he has not ten minutes to live; but if he does, I may +be of service to him: and went away. But he was soon fetched back +again for I was not dead. When he came the second time, he gave me +something to drink which recalled me to my senses: my inside being +full of blood, he thought it would be proper to bleed me, it might +ease me a little, for I could hardly breathe. After I was bled I fell +into a swoon; the Doctor then said, if he lives till one o'Clock it +will be a wonder. Some-body went to fetch a Catholic Minister[23], who +lived in the same Town; when he saw me, he told me to recommend my +soul to GOD, saying, that I had but a few minutes to live: and after +this short exhortation he went out of the room, saying, it was too +much for him to see. + + [22] I have sinned: what shall I do unto thee, O thou + preserver of men? why hast thou set me as a mark against + thee, so that I am a burden to myself. Job, chap. 7. ver. + 20. + + [23] I did not know for what purpose they went for him; but + I supposed it was to administer unto me the Extreme-Unction; + for as it is reported among the Roman Catholic that a man or + woman dying without having received the Extreme-Unction, + (_which they call a Sacrament_,) must either go to + Hell, or in Purgatory. + +I was restless all the night, for I could not sleep on account of the +soreness of my wounds. When morning came I was so weak and so +feverish, that the Doctor thought I could not live to see the sun set. +Night came, and yet alive: but I was so tormented with ideas as before +mentioned, that I durst not shut my eyes for fear I should awake in +Hell. I was three nights without taking the least rest; for I was +afraid to fall asleep, as I made it a sure thing in my mind, that if I +fell asleep, I should awake no more. I felt myself in such a miserable +condition, that I thought GOD would never forgive me. All the time I +was in bed, I lay upon thorns as it were; for I was so filled with +grief and sorrow, occasioned by my misbehaviour towards the +everlasting being, that my life was quite miserable. + +During the time of my affliction, I had such ideas and thoughts +concerning my state, that I appeared to myself the vilest of men; but +for all that I did not know from whence came these thoughts and ideas. + +I was six or seven weeks before I could walk out; and was a great +while before I could get any strength. I was five months in the most +distressing state of mind, and continually tormented by some thing or +other, which I could not discern. Some times I went out to meditate a +little, but no sooner was I out, but was forced to return home again; +because I could not rest any where. One day after many dreadful and +frightful ideas, I felt some thing extraordinary in me; and then for +the first time, I perceived that I was a sinner[24]; and one beyond +expression: I saw the horrible state in which I was plunged; I felt +that I was upon the very brink of destruction: and felt also, that no +one could alleviate my pains but GOD. For that purpose I went to +church; when there, I could hear nothing that could do me any good. At +night I went to the Methodist Chapel; there I did not find any comfort +so as to set me free. When at home, I went to prayer; but could say +nothing but the LORD's prayer, which I knew from my infancy. + + [24] Though I had had a taste and a view of the love of GOD, + (_as you may read in the former part of my life_,) and + a great desire to serve and worship him; yet I did not feel + the corruption of my fallen nature, neither the great weight + and burden of my inveterate sins and transgressions: I was + far from thinking of the inestimable worth and want of a + precious SAVIOUR. I had a zeal, but not according to + knowledge; I was like that sect which the Apostle Paul + speaks of in the tenth chapter of Romans and the third + verse: for they, being ignorant of GOD's Righteousness, and + going about to establish their own Righteousness, have not + submitted themselves unto the Righteousness of GOD. + + "I thank GOD, through the LORD JESUS CHRIST, that He has + subjected me unto his blessed and Everlasting Righteousness; + and made me sensible of this, that without the Blood of his + dear Son, my sins must for ever remain." + +I spent the week in reading the new Testament; and longed daily with +impatience for the return of Sabbath, that I might try again to seek a +place where I could lay all my burden. When that happy day was come, I +went to SION Chapel: the text was taken out of the twenty-seventh +chapter of the Prophet Isaiah, the last verse; "and it shall come to +pass when the great trumpet shall be blown" &c. I was very attentive +at the preaching, in hopes I could hear some passage that might +comfort my distressed mind. The Minister brought forward the Brazen +Serpent in his discourse, saying, when Moses lifted it up, he said, +whosoever shall believe in it, shall be saved; for thus shall the Son +of man be lifted up. I felt a little comfort from these words, but not +sufficient to calm my troubled mind; because of the weakness of my +faith. As I had not heard sufficient, I went at night to the Methodist +Chapel. I did not dislike the sermon, but did not feel so much there +as I did at SION Chapel: I spent the week rather better than I did the +last, and was not so much distressed. + +One morning I went to take a walk, when fifty yards from the house, I +remembered I had not served GOD when I got up; I was so struck with +shame, that I ran back to my chamber to say my prayers. Such a thing +as that happened unto me three times, but was always overcome by the +fear of GOD, for I durst not on any account go out of my room except I +had render'd thanks to GOD for his protecting grace and mercy; for I +thought, that if I was to neglect, his wrath would fall upon me &c. + +Sunday came, which I longed for with so much impatience; and with joy +I went again to SION Chapel. The text was taken out of the Epistle of +Paul to the Philippians, the third chapter, and the ninth verse; "and +be found in him." The very word of "be found in him," went deeply to +my heart, and proved sweet to it; for it comforted me and released me +from all my guilty fears; and convinced me of all the errors we are +liable to by Nature. I was so overjoyed at that sermon, that I could +not depart from the place till I had spoken to the Minister[25]; to +tell him the benefit I had received under his labour. I went home +joyful at what I had heard and tasted, and I cast all my cares and +sorrows away: and was only thinking to serve him who shed his blood +for me. + + [25] the Reverend Samuel Franklin, of _Ebley in + Gloucestershire_, Minister in Lady Huntingdon's + connection, then at _Ashbourn in Derbyshire_. + +Now persecution began to take place by my worldly companions; they +called me all sorts of shameful names[26], even threatened me with +punishment if I did continue in hearing the word of GOD. I could not +go through the streets without meeting with some ill treatment from +them; but as I did not mind what they said, I told them I would sooner +go to the scaffold and suffer Death, than renounce JESUS CHRIST. Their +persecutions continued for a long time, but seeing I did not take any +notice, they were obliged to let me go in peace. + + [26] My friends scorn me; but mine eye poureth out tears + unto GOD. Job, chap. 16, ver. 20. + +I went to no other place of worship but SION, where I first found the +treasure of the _Crucified One_. Some times I thought myself too +unworthy to be saved; but at other times I had better thoughts, when +reflecting on Paul, Manasseh, and other characters &c. + +The week before _Good Friday_ I was taken ill, and was obliged to keep +my bed several days. In the mean time I prayed unto GOD to give me +health and strength, that I might be able to go and hear his word that +precious day he bought my Salvation; but it was not permitted; for +that very day I was extremely ill, and wept bitterly because I could +not go to SION my happy place. So I called for a new Testament that I +might read a chapter or two; but I was so weak, that I could not read; +and was forced to put the book down. In the afternoon I felt myself a +little better, and took the book I read a chapter, by which I received +some comfort. + +I was very patient under my afflictions, for the more I was afflicted, +the more my mind was comforted; I did not fear the sting of Death at +all, because, I had faith to believe I should be happy. In a few weeks +I was entirely recovered, and the LORD soon after blessed me with the +Spirit of prayer, so that I could join my friends in CHRIST in their +labours. + +Now I am fully convinced that I am found, and brought back to the +flock of whom JESUS CHRIST is the Shepherd: and I will adore and +praise him for what He has done for me through Grace, and trust in Him +for what He has promised to do. + +"O! most blessed JESUS, thou who hast been pleased to protect me +through so many dangers, and watched over me ever since my youthful +days; be pleased I beseech thee, to keep me now that I am found: I did +not find myself, thou knowest; but it was thou, O! most blessed JESUS +who found me when lost and ready to sink into the valley of +destruction. Thou hast brought me from thousands of miles to shew me +thy light divine, and to make me a prisoner of hope instead of a +prisoner of war. O! Eternal THREE in ONE, look down on thine unworthy +servant, and water his Soul with the dew of thy Heavenly Grace, that +he may be prepared to receive that never fading Crown, which is at the +end of the race thou hast enabled him to run: and help him to renounce +all other works but thine. Now I forsake all the riches and pleasures +of this world, for the Eternal life which was purchased by the +precious Blood of thy dear Son JESUS: to which I beseech thee, to keep +me now, and to the end." AMEN. + + + THE _WEST INDIAN HYMN._ + + "_This my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost and is + found._" + + PRODIGAL'S FATHER. + + Now though six thousand miles from home, + Yet nearer to my GOD I come + 'Twas JESUS' love that set me free, + And brought me back by grace to thee, + And JESUS will lead me to see; + Eternal days. + + And now that I am found,--keep me + That I may never go from thee: + Thus fill my soul with thy free grace, + That I may run the christian race, + And see my SAVIOUR face to face; + In endless days. + + Thou didst seek me when a stranger, + In my guilt and road to danger, + And to bring me home to my GOD, + Didst interpos'd thy precious blood, + That I might sing with saints aloud; + Through endless days. + + O! blessed be the sacred Place,[27] + Where I have found such Heav'nly grace, + That sav'd me from my nature's fall, + And give me on my GOD to call; + O! JESUS at thy feet I fall: + Through endless days. + + Till then, do thou in my heart dwell, + Rule in it and do all things well: + Lead me to that e'erblessed place, + Where I hope to behold thy face, + And help me thy foot-steps to trace; + To endless rest. + + There I shall praise my SAVIOUR dear, + While his own Righteousness I wear: + I'll shout and sing redeeming love, + Which did my first affections move, + And never more will let me rove; + Through endless days. + + [27] SION Chapel. + + +_FINIS._ + + +PARKES PRINTER, and AUCTIONEER, ASHBOURN. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A short account of the extraordinary +life and travels of H. L. L., by H. L. L. + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 44974 *** |