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diff --git a/44327-0.txt b/44327-0.txt index ef4406a..61f972d 100644 --- a/44327-0.txt +++ b/44327-0.txt @@ -1,35 +1,6 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Beggar's Purse, by Samuel Hopkins Adams +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 44327 *** -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org - - -Title: The Beggar's Purse - A Fairy Tale of Familiar Finance - -Author: Samuel Hopkins Adams - -Release Date: December 1, 2013 [EBook #44327] -Last Updated: March 12, 2018 - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE BEGGAR'S PURSE *** - - - - -Produced by David Widger - - - - - -THE BEGGAR'S PURSE +THE BEGGAR’S PURSE A Fairy Tale of Familiar Finance @@ -75,14 +46,14 @@ Smith & Porter Press, Inc. -THE BEGGAR'S PURSE +THE BEGGAR’S PURSE VAN TENNER was a man who pursued his way through life by fixed habits. He lived in Philadelphia. That was one of the habits. He ate regularly, slept regularly, rose regularly, worked regularly and went to the club regularly; all this within the limits of a very comfortable income. He -never overstrained this income. That's what kept it so comfortable. +never overstrained this income. That’s what kept it so comfortable. It also kept E. Van Tenner comfortable. They were very comfortable together, which is fortunate, as there were only the two of them to look after each other. That is to say, E. Van Tenner was a bachelor. As @@ -102,7 +73,7 @@ patriotism. The professional and patriotic beggar fixed E. Van Tenner with a bright and amiable eye and said--that is, he would have said if E. Van Tenner -hadn't first said: +hadn’t first said: “No.” And then repeated it with level and considered firmness: “No. No. No.” @@ -123,10 +94,10 @@ all the arguments----” “Except one,” interrupted the beggar. “Quite useless,” said E. Van Tenner firmly. “However, proceed!” -“My argument,” said the beggar, “is based upon the word 'savings'. War +“My argument,” said the beggar, “is based upon the word ‘savings’. War _Savings_ Stamps. I propose that you shall start modestly with one of these stamps, purchased out of what you save on current expenses without -giving up anything that you need or want or aren't better off without.” +giving up anything that you need or want or aren’t better off without.” “That,” commented E. Van Tenner, smiling, “suggests magic.” @@ -149,11 +120,11 @@ faithfully done, within twenty-four hours you will have saved enough to buy one--no, two stamps; which at the present price will come to eight dollars and twenty-eight cents.” -To Van Tenner's skeptical eye the purse placed in his hand seemed an +To Van Tenner’s skeptical eye the purse placed in his hand seemed an ordinary-enough affair--a cheap, flattish wallet, without distinguishing mark until he opened it and found, set into the flap, a celluloid tablet flanked by a small pencil. Across the top of the tablet ran the legend -“What's the good?” +“What’s the good?” “A colloquial expression of the philosophy of indifference,” observed E. Van Tenner with a smile. @@ -172,14 +143,14 @@ feel.” “Much deeper,” replied the beggar gravely. “In your conscience.” “I accept your challenge,” said the other. He emptied his pockets and -deposited all his money under the guardianship of the inquiry “What's +deposited all his money under the guardianship of the inquiry “What’s the good?” “To start from the moment when I leave my office for the train.” “I shall expect to hear from you on your return,” replied the beggar, and vanished by the magical process of stepping into a bewitched -compartment which, at the touch of a brass-buttoned wizard's hand upon +compartment which, at the touch of a brass-buttoned wizard’s hand upon a lever, dropped harmlessly down a frightful chasm and disgorged him unharmed upon the street. @@ -190,22 +161,22 @@ mechanically surrendered the insignificant burden. Instinctively he felt in his change pocket to see whether he had any silver. None. Nor in his trousers pocket. Why, what had he-- -Oh, of course. The beggar's purse, in his breast pocket. He reached +Oh, of course. The beggar’s purse, in his breast pocket. He reached in for it and the purse bit him. At least that was his first startled thought, so queer and unpleasant a thrill ran up his finger. Then it -was the porter's turn to be startled, for E. Van Tenner, retrieving his +was the porter’s turn to be startled, for E. Van Tenner, retrieving his luggage, addressed to him a positive monosyllable: “None.” -“Wha'--wha' that you say, suh?” +“Wha’--wha’ that you say, suh?” -“Didn't you just ask me 'What's the good?”' +“Didn’t you just ask me ‘What’s the good?’” “Me? Lawd! No, suh!” -“Well, somebody did,” asserted E. Van Tenner, vague but emphatic. “I'll +“Well, somebody did,” asserted E. Van Tenner, vague but emphatic. “I’ll carry my own bag, thank you.” -“Ghos'es! He's hearin' ghos'es,” surmised the alarmed African, staring +“Ghos’es! He’s hearin’ ghos’es,” surmised the alarmed African, staring after his escaped patron as that haunted gentleman made his way to the Pullman window. @@ -227,25 +198,25 @@ way to a day coach before he recovered. Not until then did it occur to him that on his last trip the parlor car had been so hot and stuffy as to leave him with a headache all day. Perhaps he would be just as well off in a day coach; even better, possibly. He found a seat, disposed -himself in it and essayed to return the beggar's purse to his pocket. It +himself in it and essayed to return the beggar’s purse to his pocket. It resisted. Its reluctance was quite uncanny until E. Van Tenner observed that in some way the pencil had got afoul of the pocket flap. -“Oh, that's it!” said he, enlightened, and proceeded to make the +“Oh, that’s it!” said he, enlightened, and proceeded to make the following entries of cash saved, on the magic tablet: Station porter Parlor car $0.55 Pullman porter .15 Hardly had he settled in his place when he heard a familiar voice behind -him. He turned. I t was Welland, a near neighbor to his apartment. +him. He turned. It was Welland, a near neighbor to his apartment. Welland was in the automobile business, from which he was reputed to draw from twenty-five to thirty thousand dollars a year in commissions. It was a surprise to E. Van Tenner to find so glossily prosperous a person, with a reputation as a free spender, in the day coach. He mentioned his surprise. -“War, my dear sir, war,” said Welland. “This nation is at war. I haven't +“War, my dear sir, war,” said Welland. “This nation is at war. I haven’t ridden in a parlor car since last summer.” “Economy?” @@ -254,18 +225,18 @@ ridden in a parlor car since last summer.” “I see no principle involved except economy.” -“Don't you? The fewer heavy parlor cars the less demand on coal and +“Don’t you? The fewer heavy parlor cars the less demand on coal and rolling stock. Here I am, unable to get my normal supply of automobiles -from the factory, because the railroads can't handle them. And, mind -you, they're a necessity. They relieve the strain of suburban railway +from the factory, because the railroads can’t handle them. And, mind +you, they’re a necessity. They relieve the strain of suburban railway traffic. Men in every other line of necessary business are up against -the same thing. So I'm doing my part to relieve the situation by riding +the same thing. So I’m doing my part to relieve the situation by riding in a light day coach, which seats a hundred or so passengers instead of a heavy Pullman, which seats maybe forty.” E. Van Tenner glowed inwardly with self-satisfaction in that he had taken the unaccustomed and plebeian coach. He felt sure that the -beggar's purse would warmly approve of Welland, When that gentlemen, +beggar’s purse would warmly approve of Welland, When that gentlemen, on his suggestion, moved forward to share his seat he anticipated a pleasanter journey than he would have enjoyed in the parlor car. On the outskirts of the city the train was halted for a minute. Welland pointed @@ -278,9 +249,9 @@ such rough work?” “Because they can be had for lower wages, I suppose.” -“Not at all. They're getting men's pay; have been for months. I saw the -advertisements in the papers, offering it. No, sir! It's because the -railroad can't find men enough. Yet back in the parlor car there's a +“Not at all. They’re getting men’s pay; have been for months. I saw the +advertisements in the papers, offering it. No, sir! It’s because the +railroad can’t find men enough. Yet back in the parlor car there’s a husky roust-about picking up towels and flicking dust off chair backs for tips, while those women hustle iron. He gets none of my money!” @@ -290,8 +261,8 @@ repelled in disorder. “As long as women handle bulk metal I guess I can carry my own suit case,” observed Welland, stepping easily along under the burden of -a week-end trunk. “You've no idea how much good muscle one puts on, -juggling weights like this. Regular traveling gymnasium. Well; here's +a week-end trunk. “You’ve no idea how much good muscle one puts on, +juggling weights like this. Regular traveling gymnasium. Well; here’s where I leave you.” Bidding his companion good-by E. Van Tenner committed the following @@ -302,7 +273,7 @@ entry to his celluloid: He made his way to the outer air, where a waiting chorus celebrated his arrival by bursting, full-throated, into song: -“Taxi! Taxi! Taxi, sir! Taxi t'yer hotel. Here y'are, taxi!” The +“Taxi! Taxi! Taxi, sir! Taxi t’yer hotel. Here y’are, taxi!” The familiar sounds led him unthinkingly to the nearest cab, operated by a youthful bruiser with the arms of an ape and the jaw of an alligator. @@ -310,20 +281,20 @@ youthful bruiser with the arms of an ape and the jaw of an alligator. E. Van Tenner laid a hand on his purse, drew it forth and---- -“What's the good?” it demanded in black and authoritative print. +“What’s the good?” it demanded in black and authoritative print. “How much to the Hotel Von Gorder?” -“'Bout forty cents,” returned the tough, as one disdaining such petty +“’Bout forty cents,” returned the tough, as one disdaining such petty considerations. “Thank you,” returned E. Van Tenner politely, and entered the amount on -his tablet. “I'll walk.” +his tablet. “I’ll walk.” -“Walk!” bellowed the outraged chauffeur. “Whaddaya tryin' to do--kid +“Walk!” bellowed the outraged chauffeur. “Whaddaya tryin’ to do--kid me?” -The protrusive jaw was thrust up under E. Van Tenner's retiring nose. +The protrusive jaw was thrust up under E. Van Tenner’s retiring nose. The small, greenish eyes bored into his. “Yuh took me,” snarled their owner. “Now gidin!” @@ -332,15 +303,15 @@ Ordinarily a pacifist in all personal relations E. Van Tenner would, unsupported by ulterior influences, have meekly obeyed rather than risk a verbal or possibly physical encounter. But magic is magic and will carry him whom it upholds by its might through the imminent deadly -breach even to the cabby's mouth. Something tingled upward from the -hand that held the beggar's purse; something that snapped back E. Van -Tenner's spare shoulders to a springy squareness and fired his brain and +breach even to the cabby’s mouth. Something tingled upward from the +hand that held the beggar’s purse; something that snapped back E. Van +Tenner’s spare shoulders to a springy squareness and fired his brain and nerved his voice; and with unutterable surprise he heard himself speak in tones that were more than peremptory, that had the flick and sting of a military command: “Where is your draft registration card?” The red and savage face turned pallid and receded. The gorilla frame drooped away, then gathered itself and sprang--not upon E. Van Tenner but upon the -driver's seat of the taxi, which straightway departed with snorts of +driver’s seat of the taxi, which straightway departed with snorts of pain and terror. “Well, well!” thought E. Van Tenner, inexpressibly shocked at his @@ -348,21 +319,21 @@ newself. “In another moment I should have hit that fellow upon the nose. I am sure that I should.” A wild, infuriated yell from the motorman of a cable car, which the -routed taxi had missed by a scant inch, drew E. Van Tenner's eyes to +routed taxi had missed by a scant inch, drew E. Van Tenner’s eyes to the legend on the car, which, he perceived, ran within one block of his hotel. To save time he jumped aboard, and reached his destination as quickly as he would have done in the taxicab. On the way he corrected his entry by deducting five cents for fare; then on reflection added fifteen cents as the probable tip to the chauffeur, this representing the sheer blackmail of the dread of being considered a short sport. At -the journey's end his account read: +the journey’s end his account read: Station porter $0.15 Parlor car .55 Pullman porter .25 Red-Cap .15 Cable car vs. taxi .35 - Chauffeur's blackmail .15 + Chauffeur’s blackmail .15 Making a promising total of $1.60 already. E. Van Tenner perceived that instead of by a beggar he had been visited by one who was perhaps @@ -376,15 +347,15 @@ the hotel desk he asked for room with bath. behind the register. “Yes,” assented E. Van Tenner, and instantly felt a pang in the purse. -“That is--ah--haven't you anything for four dollars?” +“That is--ah--haven’t you anything for four dollars?” “Oh, yes; we have some as low as that,” returned the clerk superciliously; “if----” He left unfinished a conditional clause that obviously was designed to -conclude--“you don't feel that you can afford a good room.” So frail was -E. Van Tenner's humanity--let him that is without vanity cast the first -stone--that he hesitated. He didn't dare take out the beggar's purse +conclude--“you don’t feel that you can afford a good room.” So frail was +E. Van Tenner’s humanity--let him that is without vanity cast the first +stone--that he hesitated. He didn’t dare take out the beggar’s purse and look it in the face. But, then, neither did he dare look the supercilious hotel clerk in the face; that is, until---- @@ -392,7 +363,7 @@ supercilious hotel clerk in the face; that is, until---- brisk newcomer at his side; and another clerk answered promptly: “Yes, Mr. Smith; Room 1118.” -“I'll take the four-dollar room,” said E. Van Tenner firmly; and the +“I’ll take the four-dollar room,” said E. Van Tenner firmly; and the clerk, whose supercilious expression was worth thousands per year to the hotel, admitted defeat for once and said: “Very well; will you go up now?” @@ -406,12 +377,12 @@ E. Van Tenner now, and an inspired inquiry as to whether the brush brigand was of military age removed him from the path. The next obstacle was more formidable. The door of the café was guarded -by two young and unbeautiful descendants of the horseleech's daughters. +by two young and unbeautiful descendants of the horseleech’s daughters. Always before he had contributed automatically in response to their unspoken “Give! Give!” though he knew that he was only enriching some unknown capitalist in the background who rented this particular blackmailing privilege from the hotel for eight thousand dollars per -year. But--what would the fearsome beggar's purse say or do should he +year. But--what would the fearsome beggar’s purse say or do should he attempt to extract the minimum of ten cents to protect him from their cackle of disdain? Fortified as he was he could now face the contempt of man but not of these befrizzled Amazons. Yet to pass them while @@ -420,19 +391,19 @@ grasping hands were extended for his apparel. E. Van Tenner turned and fled. Do not assume, however, that his retreat was caused by cowardice alone. -Ingenuity, doubtless instigated by the beggar's purse, is entitled to +Ingenuity, doubtless instigated by the beggar’s purse, is entitled to half credit. E. Van Tenner took the elevator--free--to his room and hung his hat and coat--gratis--in the clothes press. The room, he noted with satisfaction, was precisely the same as the five-dollar variety except that it was a few floors higher. He entered one dollar saved on room, ten cents each on washroom and coat check; and descending passed, -unarmored but unscathed, the gantlet of the disarmed horseleech's +unarmored but unscathed, the gantlet of the disarmed horseleech’s great-granddaughters. Already his total was two dollars and eighty cents. Good progress toward one stamp! Upon his return to the room to resume his cast-off garments some indefinite discomfort in the region of his left big toe attracted E. -Van Tenner's unfavorable notice. Could the magic wallet have established +Van Tenner’s unfavorable notice. Could the magic wallet have established connections in that quarter? It seemed highly improbable. Investigation supplied a simpler reason--a large hole yawned in his sock. A block distant was a high-class department store. Thither he made his way, @@ -440,10 +411,10 @@ and was presently applying a rather exigent taste in hosiery to the consideration of some chastely fancy designs in striped silk. Three dollars was about his usual price. But, came the chilling thought, what would the purse say or do? Tentatively he drew it forth. It made no -protest. The legend “What's the good?” had lost its accusing aspect. +protest. The legend “What’s the good?” had lost its accusing aspect. -“After all,” reflected E. Van Tenner, “the beggar said that I wasn't to -scrimp myself.” Then to the clerk: “I'll take this pair.” +“After all,” reflected E. Van Tenner, “the beggar said that I wasn’t to +scrimp myself.” Then to the clerk: “I’ll take this pair.” Still maintaining, strict neutrality the wallet gave of its wealth. He returned it to his breast pocket. @@ -454,7 +425,7 @@ returned it to his breast pocket. “To where?” The man lifted startled eyes above a poised pencil. -“I'll have them sent to the----Ugh!” +“I’ll have them sent to the----Ugh!” It was most astounding! The magic purse, quiescent during the deal, was now catching at his breath like an ice-water douche over the heart. Had @@ -463,26 +434,26 @@ socks? Not without a struggle. “Could you deliver them this afternoon?” -“We could if it isn't too far.” +“We could if it isn’t too far.” “Then have them sent to----Oh, Lord! No use!” “Are you ill, sir?” asked the floorwalker, approaching anxiously. -Some unknown incitement forced a question to E. Van Tenner's lips: “See +Some unknown incitement forced a question to E. Van Tenner’s lips: “See here, does it cost you anything to deliver goods?” “Certainly. In time and labor from twelve cents per package upward.” So that was it! The magic was working beyond the limits of his own -exchequer. Obviously it didn't propose to sit by and watch him waste -anybody's money, even a store's. +exchequer. Obviously it didn’t propose to sit by and watch him waste +anybody’s money, even a store’s. -“I'll take them with me,” said he. “Thank you, sir,” said the floorman. +“I’ll take them with me,” said he. “Thank you, sir,” said the floorman. As he departed with his purchase E. Van Tenner felt a sensation as if a very soft and satisfied kitten were purring against his chest. “All -right,” said he, speaking down his shirt front; “but don't you get too +right,” said he, speaking down his shirt front; “but don’t you get too dictatorial.” Business took up the rest of the afternoon; business in which the purse played an honorable and unprotesting part, though its course at one point called for a taxi expenditure of something more than @@ -493,12 +464,12 @@ indefinitely. But when he came to pay the chauffeur the wallet produced the exact amount with a precision that he could not but feel to be significant. In vain did he search for a tip. -“What's the good?” demanded his mentor. “What's the good of making a -present to a man in whom you have no possible interest and who hasn't -done anything that he isn't paid to do by his employer?” +“What’s the good?” demanded his mentor. “What’s the good of making a +present to a man in whom you have no possible interest and who hasn’t +done anything that he isn’t paid to do by his employer?” “Not the slightest,” admitted E. Van Tenner in the face of the disgusted -taxi man; and even added cheerfully: “That's the precise amount, I +taxi man; and even added cheerfully: “That’s the precise amount, I believe.” So swiftly and blithely does one become hardened to impotent scorn! Thus @@ -512,30 +483,30 @@ seemed to be asking each other whether this comparatively nude intruder had perhaps pawned his overcoat. “Dry Martini,” ordered E. Van Tenner upon seating himself. Instantly and -miraculously the beggar's wallet seemed to have dropped from his +miraculously the beggar’s wallet seemed to have dropped from his vest pocket to the pit of his stomach, upon which it pressed with a destructive insistence. “Wait a moment!” said its proprietor slave hastily to the waiter; then -added in a low but indignant undertone: “See here! It isn't your affair -to censor my morals and habits. You're a committee on finance, and -that's all!” He plucked forth the purse into the light of day. “What's +added in a low but indignant undertone: “See here! It isn’t your affair +to censor my morals and habits. You’re a committee on finance, and +that’s all!” He plucked forth the purse into the light of day. “What’s the good?” it inquired with an air of sweet reasonableness. E. Van Tenner reflected. After all, what was the good? Either he had an -appetite for dinner, in which case he didn't need the cocktail; or else +appetite for dinner, in which case he didn’t need the cocktail; or else he needed the cocktail to create an appetite for dinner, in which case -it was high time that he quit the habit. Hadn't the beggar distinctly -told him that he needn't give up anything which he would'nt be better +it was high time that he quit the habit. Hadn’t the beggar distinctly +told him that he needn’t give up anything which he wouldn’t be better off without. “Never mind the Martini,” said he wearily? During dinner he looked over the theatrical advertisements in his paper, and hesitating between those classically named productions whereto a discriminating -public taste is addressed, Atta Boy, Oh, Slush, and Gertie's Green +public taste is addressed, Atta Boy, Oh, Slush, and Gertie’s Green Garters, fixed upon the latter. He must now retrieve his coat and hat, upon which he had saved another dime. Ascending to his room he switched on the lights, got into his outer garments, locked his door and started for the elevator. A slight but insistent cramp in the pocketbook halted -him. What could that mean? He wasn't spending any money. If it was a +him. What could that mean? He wasn’t spending any money. If it was a protest against theatergoing it was premature. Let it wait till he got to the theater! He started again, and caught his breath over a more pronounced pang. His eyes, turning upward, were arrested by the glowing @@ -553,23 +524,23 @@ or may not have been there for that very purpose--mentioned that the Bilbosh Agency had some good seats. Thither went E. Van Tenner. Yes; the agency had a few seats left. There was one in the eighth row, three dollars and thirty cents, please. At the mention of the price the -beggar's purse leaped from E. Van Tenner's hand and fell flat on its +beggar’s purse leaped from E. Van Tenner’s hand and fell flat on its face upon the floor. E. Van Tenner took it forth and gave it air. Now in our amiable and easy-going bachelor there was a definite streak of obstinacy. He had -undertaken to see Gertie's Green Garters and see it he would, always +undertaken to see Gertie’s Green Garters and see it he would, always assuming that the magic receptacle would permit. He retraced his steps to the theater, retired to a corner of the lobby and drew forth the chancellor of his exchequer. -“What's the good?” it questioned. But the effect was that of inquiry, +“What’s the good?” it questioned. But the effect was that of inquiry, not of challenge. -“The good is that I've done a day's work and am entitled to some -amusement. What's the harm?” +“The good is that I’ve done a day’s work and am entitled to some +amusement. What’s the harm?” -The beggar's purse appeared to accept this view complaisantly. Back to +The beggar’s purse appeared to accept this view complaisantly. Back to the ticket window stepped E. Van Tenner. “What is the best seat you have for tonight?” he asked the duke of the @@ -578,11 +549,11 @@ diagram. “Tenth row in the balcony; one sixty-five.” “Can you see the stage from it?” “Oh, yes,” replied the duke wearily. “You can see the stage.” His tone, -aimed at the inquirer's vanity, commented: “If you're the kind of cheap -person who goes into the balcony.” But E. Van Tenner's vanity was now +aimed at the inquirer’s vanity, commented: “If you’re the kind of cheap +person who goes into the balcony.” But E. Van Tenner’s vanity was now armored like the tropic ant-eater. -“I'll take it,” he said; and the beggars purse opened automatically. +“I’ll take it,” he said; and the beggars purse opened automatically. Rather to his surprise he found that his view of the play was just as unobstructed as in the orchestra seats to which he had been accustomed; @@ -629,22 +600,22 @@ hovered over him, portentous and awful, the head waiter himself. “You haf ordered?” he inquired. -“I--that is--no; I think I won't order this evening,” quavered the +“I--that is--no; I think I won’t order this evening,” quavered the patron. “There is a table charch of one dollar,” said the official severely. -E. Van Tenner, overawed, reached for the beggar's purse. It flatly +E. Van Tenner, overawed, reached for the beggar’s purse. It flatly refused to open. As the owner strove with it there was instilled into his veins a calm and chill determination, born of a discovery that he had made--or had the purse magically indicated it?--regarding the menu. “I shall not pay it,” he said quietly. -“You shouldt haf to pay it.” The head waiter's threatening tone took on +“You shouldt haf to pay it.” The head waiter’s threatening tone took on a little more pronounced accent. -“You're a German, aren't you?” inquired E. Van Tenner blandly. +“You’re a German, aren’t you?” inquired E. Van Tenner blandly. “Dot is my bisaness,” retorted the other excitedly. “You pay dot table charch!” @@ -656,32 +627,32 @@ Tuesday! Come; what do you say?” The head waiter said nothing. His jaw dropped. He put his hand to his chin undecidedly, then turned and fled, taking the card with him. -Glowing with virtue--which, after all, was the purse's, not his--E. +Glowing with virtue--which, after all, was the purse’s, not his--E. Van Tenner departed, not even tipping the coat-room attendant, to such heights was his courage inspired, and found a chop-house where he supped excellently on a strict Hoover basis, and entered an estimated saving of eighty-five cents, and ten cents extra for the defrauded hat boy. All that night he slept the deep, sweet sleep of one justified of good -deeds. The beggar's purse, at least equally justified, slept equally +deeds. The beggar’s purse, at least equally justified, slept equally well under his pillow. In the morning it started work for him again. It saved him the usual coat-room charge, and rudely checked his mildly emotional impulse to drop a quarter in the tin cup of a pitiable and shivering mendicant cripple who owns two tenement houses on the -East Side and has amassed a small fortune by distraining on tenants' -furniture. He hardly knew whether to repeat the entry on the morning's +East Side and has amassed a small fortune by distraining on tenants’ +furniture. He hardly knew whether to repeat the entry on the morning’s taxi or not, since he felt it already a habit not to hire a cab when he could conveniently take a car. But he was clearly to the good on one item of a quarter, when in carrying his grip from the elevator he was -charged upon by a livered youth. Horror was writ large in that youth's +charged upon by a livered youth. Horror was writ large in that youth’s face; horror that a guest of the golden Von Gorder should carry a grip weighing almost four pounds across ten yards of floor alone and unaided. As Christian strove with Apollyon so strove E. Van Tenner with the liveried youth for that grip, which he finally delivered safe out of the -enemy's hands, and himself bore, triumphant, to the street car. +enemy’s hands, and himself bore, triumphant, to the street car. In the returning train, where he won to the day coach through the -stricken hopes of the embattled Red-Caps, he figured out his day's +stricken hopes of the embattled Red-Caps, he figured out his day’s savings to date as follows: @@ -690,17 +661,17 @@ savings to date as follows: Pullman porter...............................................25 Red-Cap......................................................15 Cable car vs. taxi...........................................35 - Chauffeur's blackmail........................................15 + Chauffeur’s blackmail........................................15 Pride of hotel room that went before a fall in price.......1.00 Washroom hold-up.............................................10 Coat check...................................................10 - 2d Chauffeur's supertax......................................25 + 2d Chauffeur’s supertax......................................25 Cocktail forgone.............................................25 3 Check-room petty larcenies.................................30 1 Theater-ticket-agency grand larceny......................1.65 Cabaret highway robbery......................................85 Victory in wrestling match with hall boy.....................25 - Cripple's curse..............................................25 + Cripple’s curse..............................................25 Cable car vs. taxi [he decided to put it in, including tip] .50 Triumph in footrace with Red-Caps............................15 Parlor-car fare and tip......................................80 @@ -708,21 +679,21 @@ savings to date as follows: Making a grand, impressive, but insufficient total of.....$8.05 -Insufficient, because two of the beggar's War Savings Stamps would cost +Insufficient, because two of the beggar’s War Savings Stamps would cost $8.28. At the Philadelphia terminus he would save fifteen cents more -of his accustomed expenditure by dispensing with the porter's service. +of his accustomed expenditure by dispensing with the porter’s service. Still he would be eight cents short of the total. Suddenly E. Van Tenner felt himself bitterly disappointed. The zest of the game had got into his veins. Had he braved hotel clerks, striven with bell boys, bearded head waiters and outfooted the fleet and determined Red-Cap only to fail in sight of the goal? -Perish the----“Evening papers! All the magazines! Here y'are before the +Perish the----“Evening papers! All the magazines! Here y’are before the train starts.” “Evening Sentinel and Sat--” began E. Van Tenner, and dropped his voice -and the beggar's purse simultaneously. “Never mind. Don't want--I mean -need--'em.” For here was his eight cents saved! With a triumphing +and the beggar’s purse simultaneously. “Never mind. Don’t want--I mean +need--’em.” For here was his eight cents saved! With a triumphing heart he retrieved the wallet, took out the pencil and entered upon the celluloid tablet the final and victorious eight cents--that is, he thought he had entered it. But lo! the line upon which he had written @@ -736,13 +707,13 @@ written with a wand upon water. In response there came back to him again the words of the beggar: “What you save on current expenses without giving up anything that you need or -want or aren't better off without.” Obviously, then, the beggar's purse -was backing up the beggar's undertaking. It considered that he was +want or aren’t better off without.” Obviously, then, the beggar’s purse +was backing up the beggar’s undertaking. It considered that he was better off with than without his favorite reading. E. Van Tenner pursued the boy and spent the eight cents. All the way back to Philadelphia, however, his mind reverted painfully -to the problem. In vain did he pass up a subsequent train boy's +to the problem. In vain did he pass up a subsequent train boy’s blandishments on the subject of chocolate; he never ate chocolate. The sensitive tablet refused to be gulled into accepting an entry on any such pretext. Equally idle was it to pretend that he might have given a @@ -752,30 +723,30 @@ the train was nearly an hour late. Consequently there would be no opportunity of further saving; not even eight cents. Heavy-hearted he disembarked. The beggar had asked to be informed about -the experiment. Well; he'd tell him. Too bad! Might as well get it over -with. And there was only ten minutes' leeway. He'd phone from that +the experiment. Well; he’d tell him. Too bad! Might as well get it over +with. And there was only ten minutes’ leeway. He’d phone from that hotel opposite. Possibly the beggar could, of his magic, evolve some last-moment plan. So approaching the telephone girl he began: “Broad, Four-four----” and gasped. -The beggar's purse had stirred. It had more than stirred. It had +The beggar’s purse had stirred. It had more than stirred. It had flopped. It was now doing more than flopping. It was turning frantic handsprings in his pocket. -“Never mind that call,” said the perturbed E. Van Tenner. “I'll--I'll +“Never mind that call,” said the perturbed E. Van Tenner. “I’ll--I’ll write.” -The beggar's purse settled down and went to sleep. +The beggar’s purse settled down and went to sleep. “How--how much would that call have been?” asked E. Van Tenner breathlessly. “Local. Ten cents.” -“And a letter--no, a postal card--is two cents. That's eight cents -saved. The exact amount! Gimme a postal card. No; I don't need to write. -I'll save the whole ten cents and be two cents to the good. I've done -it! I've done it! Whoopee!” said E. Van Tenner, dancing upon the marble +“And a letter--no, a postal card--is two cents. That’s eight cents +saved. The exact amount! Gimme a postal card. No; I don’t need to write. +I’ll save the whole ten cents and be two cents to the good. I’ve done +it! I’ve done it! Whoopee!” said E. Van Tenner, dancing upon the marble floor. “Police!” said the telephone girl. @@ -796,386 +767,22 @@ there awaiting him. “Lessons?” -“Haven't you learned anything in the last twenty-four hours?” +“Haven’t you learned anything in the last twenty-four hours?” -E. Van Tenner considered. “I've learned that every time I spend a -dollar I spend an extra quarter for vanity and a dime for timidity. I've -learned how to go without things I don't want, and to stop doing -things I dislike myself for doing. I've learned the difference between +E. Van Tenner considered. “I’ve learned that every time I spend a +dollar I spend an extra quarter for vanity and a dime for timidity. I’ve +learned how to go without things I don’t want, and to stop doing +things I dislike myself for doing. I’ve learned the difference between parsimony and thrift.” “Is it worth anything to you?” insinuated the worker of white magic. “How many stamps can I take?” -“One hundred and ninety-eight more. That'll make your total investment -$828 and it'll bring you in $1000 at maturity.” +“One hundred and ninety-eight more. That’ll make your total investment +$828 and it’ll bring you in $1000 at maturity.” -“I'll buy.” Thus did E. Van Tenner, exwaster, join the Take-the-Limit +“I’ll buy.” Thus did E. Van Tenner, exwaster, join the Take-the-Limit Club. - - - - - - - - -End of Project Gutenberg's The Beggar's Purse, by Samuel Hopkins Adams - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE BEGGAR'S PURSE *** - -***** This file should be named 44327-0.txt or 44327-0.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/4/4/3/2/44327/ - -Produced by David Widger - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions -will be renamed. - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no -one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation -(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without -permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, -set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to -copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to -protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. 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