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The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Christian Mother, by Maria Eliza Hoare


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Title: The Christian Mother
       or, Notes for Mothers' Meetings


Author: Maria Eliza Hoare



Release Date: March 10, 2013  [eBook #42291]

Language: English

Character set encoding: UTF-8


***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CHRISTIAN MOTHER***


Transcribed from the 1876 Hatchards edition by David Price, email
ccx074@pglaf.org





                                   THE
                            CHRISTIAN MOTHER:


                                   OR,

                       NOTES FOR MOTHERS’ MEETINGS.

                                * * * * *

                               BY THE LATE
                              MRS E. HOARE.

                                * * * * *

                             Second Edition.

                                * * * * *

                                 LONDON:
                          HATCHARDS, PICCADILLY.
                                  1876.

                                * * * * *

                                 LONDON:
          Printed by JOHN STRANGEWAYS, Castle St. Leicester Sq.




PREFACE TO SECOND EDITION.


THE following Notes were prepared and published some years ago, by one
who has since realised in Heaven the unspeakable value of those precious
truths which she most diligently taught on earth.  The little book has
been for a long time out of print, but it appears so calculated to be
useful in the Lord’s service that I have thought it well to publish
another edition.  It was said of Abel, ‘He being dead yet speaketh.’  May
the admirable mother by whom these notes were prepared so speak in these
pages to those who know a mother’s care, that they may be assisted to
enjoy the full experience of a mother’s joy!

                                                                 E. HOARE.

TUNBRIDGE WELLS,
         _April_, 1876.




PREFACE.


THE following notes have been used by the writer in conducting Mothers’
Meetings amongst the poorer classes, and it has been suggested that they
may be useful to other ladies engaged in a similar work.

With this view, she has ventured to publish them in the present concise
form.

It will be seen that they are merely skeletons, and will require to be
filled up by each person who makes use of them.  Thus it will be
necessary to _turn to the texts referred to_, and to enlarge on each head
as familiarly as possible, illustrating it by simple, and telling facts.

If this is done, and the subjects well studied, it will often be found,
that, although each subject has been generally compressed into one
chapter, it is better to take one, two, or three heads, as affording
sufficient matter for the conversation of a single evening, rather than
too hastily to go over the whole section.

It will be a cause for thankfulness, if these short notes may be the
means of leading any mothers to search the Scriptures more diligently
with reference to their own especial duties.

Whether rich or poor—educated or uneducated—mothers all need, in the
great essentials, the _same_ help, the _same_ warnings, the _same_
encouragements.  They want to be comforted, both in duty and trial, by
the _same_ word of promise, and to ‘go boldly to the _same_ throne of
grace to obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.’  It is
earnestly desired that the study of the following pages, which are, in
fact, only a compilation of Scripture, may be the means of leading many
to listen more closely to _His_ voice, who knows so well the mother’s
heart, the mother’s sins, the mother’s sorrows, and the mother’s need.

                                                                  M. E. H.

TUNBRIDGE WELLS,
         _December_, 1862.




CONTENTS.

                                                             PAGE
Importance of Children                                          9
The Temper of the Wife, and Mother                             11
Truth—part I.                                                  12
Truth—part II.                                                 13
The Excellent Woman—as a Wife                                  15
„ „—in her Home                                                17
„ „—in her Conversation                                        19
„ „—her Religion                                               21
„ „—her Reward                                                 22
How to spend Sunday                                            24
Companions                                                     26
Sloth                                                          28
The Watchful Mother                                            29
The Hasty Mother                                               31
The Weary Mother                                               32
The Careless Mother                                            35
The Careful Mother                                             37
The Patient Mother                                             38
The Firm Mother                                                39
Conversion                                                     41
Thou, God, seest me                                            43
Jesus the Mother’s Friend                                      44
Helps for Mothers—part I.                                      46
Helps for Mothers—part II.                                     48
Teach your Children                                            50
The Parting Place, and the Meeting Place                       51
The Mother’s Death-bed                                         54
New Year’s Day                                                 55
First Meeting in the Year                                      57
Last Meeting in the Year.  The Cradle and the Grave            59




I.  IMPORTANCE OF CHILDREN.


    ‘Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones.’  Matt.
    xviii. 10.

I.  They are important to _Society_.

  Our future soldiers, sailors, servants, fathers, mothers, husbands,
  wives, &c., &c.

II.  Important to _yourselves_.

  The babe—the child—the young man—the young woman.

  A gift (Gen. xxxiii. 5; xlviii. 9) which must prove either your crown
  (Prov. xvii. 6; Ps. cxxvii. 3) or your bitterness.  Prov. xvii. 25;
  Gen. xlii. 38.

III.  Important to _themselves_.

  That child must live for ever.

  A living soul committed to your care.

  That child must stand before the judgment-seat of Christ.  Rev. xx. 12.

IV.  Important in the sight of _their Father who is in heaven_.

  So important—that for them He gave His only Son to shed His blood.

  So important—that He especially calls, ‘Suffer little children,’ &c.
  Mark, x. 14.

  So important—that He gives His angels special charge over them.  Matt.
  xviii. 10.

    ‘Take heed then that ye despise not one of these little ones.’

No jewel so precious as the soul of your child, but how far more do
parents often prize the casket containing it, than the gem itself!

No plant so needing watchful care and culture; Oh! neglect it not!

What have YOU done with your jewel, your plant?




II.  THE TEMPER OF THE WIFE, AND MOTHER.


I.  What she should _not_ be.

  1.  Provoking.  Eph. vi. 4.  Prov. xv. 1.  Gal. v. 26.

  2.  Easily provoked.  1 Cor. xiii. 5.  Jam. i. 19.

  3.  Brawling.  Prov. xxi. 9; xxv. 24.

  4.  Contentious.  Prov. xix. 13; xxi. 19; xxvii. 15.

II.  What she _should_ be.

  1.  Gentle.  1 Thess. ii. 7.  1 Pet. iii. 4.  Children are soon
  frightened by rough words, or rough treatment.

  2.  Forbearing.  Eph. iv. 2.  Col. iii. 13.  If _you_ cannot bear with
  your children, who will?

  3.  Patient.  1 Thess. v. 14.  Eccles. vii. 8.  A mother has need of
  great patience.

  4.  Loving.  Tit. ii. 4.

III.  In your daily temper take Christ as your example.

    ‘_Consider Him_ who endured such contradiction of sinners against
    himself, lest ye be weary, and faint in your minds.’  Heb. xii. 3.




III.  TRUTH.  1.


Importance of truth.  Prov. xii. 19.

The liar’s portion.  Rev. xxi. 8; xxii. 15.

How can you enforce the necessity of truth, and the sin of lying upon
your children?

I.  You must enforce it by _example_.

  1.  Never deceive them.  The word passed must never be broken.  Be
  careful, then, how you promise or threaten.

  2.  Always adhere yourself closely to truth.  In _little_ things as
  well as _great_, in _deed_ as well as _word_.  What a warning is
  Rebecca (Gen. xxvii.) of the danger of the first downward step, and the
  baneful influence of a mother’s evil example!

  3.  Let them see that you cling closely to truth, even when it is to
  your own disadvantage.  Ps. xv. 5, Prayer-book version.

  4.  Never get out of a difficulty by an untruth.

II.  To do this be ever—

  Watchful.  Ps. cxli. 3.

  Prayerful.  Ps. cxix. 29.




IV.  TRUTH.  2.


Last meeting we found that it is useless to enforce the necessity of
truth, unless the mother is consistent in her _example_.  Besides this:

II.  Enforce it by instruction and by precept.

  Tell—how God hates lying.  Prov. vi. 16, 17; xii. 22.

  Tell—histories from Scripture to show how God hates it.  Satan, Gen.
  iii. 4.  Gehazi, 2 Kings, v. 25.  Ananias, Acts, v. 1–11.

  Tell—who is the father of lies.  John, viii. 44.

  Tell—the consequences of lying.  Ps. v. 6; lv. 23.  Rev. xxi. 8.

III.  Avoid severity.

  Children are often frightened into deceit by fear of their parents’
  severity.

IV.  Do not put temptations to lie in a child’s way.

  Do not encourage them to conceal anything from their father,
  schoolmaster, master, or mistress, if in service.

V.  Correct for a lie.

  It is a false love which dispenses with a needful chastisement.  Prov.
  xiii. 24; xix. 18.

  But always with prayer.

VI.  Let the child see that you are grieved for his sin.  That it gives
you _sorrow_, not only causes _anger_.  Ps. cxix. 158.

VII.  Make it a subject of prayer with your child that the way of lying
may be removed from him.  Ps. cxix. 29.  Prov. xxx. 8.




V.  THE EXCELLENT WOMAN.


                               Prov. xxxi.

                                AS A WIFE.

I.  A wife _ought_ to be a chief blessing; a good wife _is_ so.  Verse
10.  Prov. xii. 4; xviii. 22; xix. 14.

II.  Her husband can safely trust her.  Ver. 11.

  Money—children—sure of her affection—no secrets.

III.  She does him good, and not evil all the days of her life.  Verse
12.

  Not like Eve.  Gen. iii. 6.

  Or Samson’s wife.  Enticing—coaxing—teazing—weeping—betraying.  Judg.
  xiv. 16.

IV.  She cares for his bodily wants.  Verses 15, 23.

  To do this must be a ‘keeper at home.’  Tit. ii. 5.

V.  She submits if wills clash.

  Not often the case in a happy home.

  Yields cheerfully, not grudgingly, when in accordance with God’s will.
  Col. iii. 18.  Eph. v. 22.

VI.  She endeavours to _win_ her husband, does not try to _drive_.  1
Pet. iii. 1.  1 Cor. vii. 16.

  Win to religion by displaying its beauty and brightness in your lives.

VII.  She is a spiritual help to her husband.  1 Pet. iii. 7.

  ‘Mutual help and comfort.’  Marriage Service.

  Not a hindrance.  Luke, xiv. 20.

  A wife has more opportunity than any one of seeing her husband’s
  faults.  Do not _talk_ about them, but _pray_ about them.




VI.  THE EXCELLENT WOMAN.


                               Prov. xxxi.

                               IN HER HOME.

I.  She is diligent.  Verses 13, 15, 18, 19, 22, 27.  So 1 Tim. v. 10.
Rom. xii. 8.

  No gossiping; standing at doors; idling at neighbours.

  Observe what is said of the diligent in the Book of Proverbs.

  Maketh rich.  Prov. x. 4.

  Prospered (Prov. xii. 24, 27; xiii. 4; xxi. 5.)  Sometimes worldly
  diligence leads to spiritual sloth.  Let it not be so with you; but
  whilst you are ‘not slothful in business,’ be also ‘fervent in spirit;
  serving the Lord.’  Rom. xii. 11.

II.  She is prudent.  Verses 13, 14, 15.

  Looks well to her goings.  Prov. xiv. 15.  Looks forward.  Prov. xxii.
  3; xxvii. 12.  Enjoys a special blessing.  Prov. xix. 14.

III.  Overlooks her household.  Verses 15, 21, 27.

  Children, servants, if she has any.

  Your household, of whomsoever it may consist, should share your
  blessings and privileges.  Gen. xviii. 19.  Lev. xvi. 17.  Acts, xvi.
  15.

  Important to impress this upon your girls going to service.  A _good_
  mistress _ought_, and _will_, look after them.  No kindness in lax
  discipline.  Look back to your own days of service.  Who was the best
  mistress?  1 Tim. v. 14.




VII.  THE EXCELLENT WOMAN.


                               Prov. xxxi.

                           IN HER CONVERSATION.

I.  ‘She openeth her mouth with _wisdom_,’ verse 26.

  1.  No foolish talking, or jesting.  Job, xv. 3.  Eph. v. 4.

  2.  No chattering or gossip, which tends to penury.  Prov. xiv. 23.
  Eccles. x. 11, 14.

  3.  No deception.  Prov. xxiv. 28; xx. 17.

II.  ‘In her tongue is the law of _kindness_,’ verse 26.

  1.  No tale-bearing or back-biting.  Prov. xxv. 23; xxvi. 22.  Ps. xv.
  3.

  How mischievous.  Prov. xxiv. 2.

  2.  No flattering, like wicked woman.  Prov. v. 3; vi. 24.  Ps. v. 9.

III.   How important to bridle the tongue.  Jam. i. 26.

  There is often much wisdom in silence.  Ps. xxxiv. 13.  Prov. xvii. 28;
  xxix. 11.

  Let your conversation be as it becometh the gospel of Christ.  Philip,
  i. 27.  Ps. lxxvii. 12.  Prov. xv. 4.  1 Pet. iii. 1.  2 Pet. iii. 11.
  Col. iii. 16.

  Make this your prayer.  Ps. xix. 14; cxli. 3.

  Blessing promised.  Ps. l. 23.

IV.  Three good rules.

  1.  So speak to your husband and children, that should these be your
  _last_ words, you would not regret them.

  2.  Never say anything of your neighbours you would dislike them to
  overhear.

  3.  In all your conversation, remember that the Lord is nigh, and hears
  each word.




VIII.  THE EXCELLENT WOMAN.


                               Prov. xxxi.

                              HER RELIGION.

I.  The secret of her many excellencies here portrayed.

  It did not consist in _beauty_.  Verse 30.  A pretty face often leads
  to ruin.  Prov. xi. 22.  Ezek. xxviii. 17.

  Never make much of a child’s beauty.

  But it was this, she was a _religious_ woman, actuated in all she did
  by the _fear of the Lord_.  Verse 30.

  The woman who fears the Lord.

1.  Hates evil.  Prov. viii. 13.

2.  It is her moving principle, ‘all the day long.’  Prov. xxiii. 17.

3.  She is happy, though poor.  Prov. xv. 16.

4.  It is her confidence and refuge in trial.  Prov. xiv. 26.

5.  It is _well_ with her.  Eccles. viii. 12.

II.  She shows her love to Christ, by her love to His people.  Verse 20.

  Acts, ix. 36.  Heb. xiii. 16.

  You need not be _rich_ to be _charitable_.

  The poorest may give.  2 Cor. viii. 2.

  God looks not at the size, or value of the gift, but the motive from
  which it springs.  2 Cor. viii. 12.

  The widow’s mite.  Mark, xii. 42, 44.

  The cup of cold water.  Matt. x. 42; xxv. 35.

  Nursing a sick neighbour.  1 Tim. v. 10.




IX.  THE EXCELLENT WOMAN.


                               Prov. xxxi.

                               HER REWARD.

I.  Her children regard her with grateful love, and look back with
thankfulness to her care and teaching.  Verse 28. _e.g._ Timothy, 2 Tim.
i. 5, and David, Ps. lxxxvi. 16; cxvi. 16.

II.  Her husband confides in her, blesses her, honours her.  Verse 28.

  Eph. v. 25, 31.  1 Pet. iii. 7.

III.  She reaps the fruit of her labours.  Verse 31.  Deut. iv. 40.
Prov. xx. 7; xxii. 6; xxix. 17.  2 John, 4.

IV.  She shall rejoice in time to come.  Verse 25.

  Not only in this world (Ps. cxviii. 15), but in the life to come.

  In the future kingdom, will not her children, for whom she prayed and
  laboured, be to her, as St. Paul says his spiritual children will be to
  him, ‘Her joy, her crown of rejoicing in the presence of our Lord Jesus
  Christ at His coming?’  1 Thess. ii. 19.

  Let this cheer the faint-hearted and discouraged Christian mother; she
  sows perhaps now with bitter tears, but she shall ‘reap in joy.’




X.  HOW TO SPEND SUNDAY.


    ‘Remember the Sabbath Day to keep it holy.’

Mothers can effect much by domestic arrangement, and forethought.

I.  Make Saturday a ‘day of preparation.’  ‘Bake that which ye will bake
to-day,’ &c.  Exod. xvi. 5, 23.  Mark, xv. 42.  Luke, xxiii. 54.

II.  Endeavour to make the Sunday

1.  A _holy_ day.

  Exod. xx. 10, 11.  Deut. v. 12.  Gen. ii. 3.

  To sanctify, signifies to set apart for a holy purpose.  Thus in the
  New Testament the Sabbath is called ‘the Lord’s day.’  Rev. i. 10,
  because a day devoted to His service.

2.  A _resting_ day.

  Gen. ii. 3.  Lev. xxiii. 3.  Matt. xxiii. 56.

  Called ‘the Sabbath of _rest_.’  Lev. xxiii. 3.  And ‘the _rest_ of the
  holy Sabbath.’  Exod. xvi. 23.  _Sabbath_ signifies _rest_, and heaven,
  of which it is a type, is called, ‘the keeping of a _Sabbath_.’  Heb.
  iv. 9.

3.  A _happy_ day.

  It is a _gift_, a _privilege_, not a task.

  Exod. xvi. 29.  Isa. lviii. 13.

  Not esteemed to be such, unless God’s service felt to be a _delight_.
  Others say, ‘When will the Sabbath be gone?’  Amos, viii. 5.

  Let there be no gloom in the home, but a cheerful sobriety.

4.  A _profitable_ day.

  Though _rest_, not _idleness_.  Children are always happiest when their
  minds are employed.

  To profit pay great attention to Public Worship, Deut. xxxi. 12, 13.
  Acts, xiii. 42; xvi. 13; xviii. 4.  Heb. x. 25.

  Observe our Lord’s example.  Luke, iv. 16.

  The Sunday School is a great help to the poor mother.

  Cultivate religious occupation.  _e.g._  Find texts—repeat hymns—sing
  hymns, &c.

III.  Observe the promise.

  Isa. lvi. 2–7: lviii. 13, 14.




XI.  COMPANIONS.


I.  Danger of bad companions.

  One bad companion corrupts many.  ‘A little leaven leaveneth the whole
  lump.’  1 Cor. v. 6.

  ‘Evil communications corrupt good manners.’  1 Cor. xv. 33.

  Eph. v. 11.  Prov. xxii. 24, 25.

  You are warned in the Scriptures against making companions of:

1.  Fools.  Prov. xiii. 20.

2.  Riotous.  Prov. xxviii. 7.

3.  Thieves.  Isa. i. 23.

4.  Depraved.  Prov. xxix. 3.  1 Cor. v. 9.

5.  Irreligious.  2 Thess. iii. 14.  Jam. iv. 4.

  If important for yourselves, doubly so for the young, unformed minds of
  your children.

II.  Form good friendships.

  ‘The friendship of the world is enmity with God.’  Jam. iv. 4.

  David chose his friends from those who feared God.  Ps. cxix. 63.  Heb.
  x. 33.

III.  Observe three rules for the sake of your _children_, as well as
_yourselves_.

1.  Never harbour bad guests.

  Lodgers—workpeople.

2.  Never associate with the wicked, unless obliged to do so, or with a
view to doing them good.

  Even this needs caution.

3.  Remember, ‘A man is known by his friends.’

  You and your children will be judged by the company you keep.




XII.  SLOTH.


I.  The command to be diligent is plain.  Rom. xii. 11.  2 Thess. iii.
10, 11.

II.  See the miserable results of sloth.

  1.  It leads to tattling.  1 Tim. v. 13.

  2.  Decay.  Eccles. x. 18.

  3.  Difficulties.  Prov. xv. 19.

  4.  Waste.  Prov. xviii. 9.

  5.  Want.  Prov. xx. 4; xxiv. 30, 34.

III.  Contrast excellent woman (Prov. xxxi. 27) with the slothful person.
Prov. xix. 24; xxiv. 30; x. 26.

IV.  Learn a lesson from the ant for yourselves—for your children.  Prov.
vi. 6, &c.

  Give your children something to do.

  Remember, they must be _set to work_, though it is often more trouble
  to you to teach _them_ to do it, than to do it _yourself_—yet
  persevere.

V.  If not slothful in your temporal affairs, above all be not slothful
concerning the salvation of your souls.

  Heb. vi. 11, 12.  2 Pet. i. 10.




XIII.  THE WATCHFUL MOTHER.


No eye should be so wakeful and watchful as a mother’s.

I.  Watch over your children _in infancy_.

  Exod. ii. 8.  1 Sam. i. 23.

  It is described as next to impossible for a woman to forget her sucking
  child.  Isa. xlix. 15.

  A well-watched infancy, under God’s blessing, avoids many future ills.

II.  Watch over your children’s _education_.

  Judg. xiii. 8.

  In every minute particular.

  Learning—clothing, &c.  1 Sam. ii. 19.  Prov. xxxi. 21, 23.

  Contrast the dirty, unmended clothes of the poor, uncared-for child,
  with the clean and neatly mended garments of him whose childhood is
  guarded by the watchful eye of a mother.

III.  Watch them in times of sickness and death.

  No eye so quick to discover a hidden ill.

  2 Kings, iv. 19, 20.  John, xix. 25.

IV.  Above all watch over the precious soul.

  Never lose sight of the soul, in care for the body.

  1.  _Watch_, as those that must give account.  Heb. xiii. 17.

  2.  _Watch_, to detect sin, and check its growth.

  Mark first sign of the plague spot.

  3.  _Watch_, for opportunity to lead to Christ.  Prov. xv. 23.  Deut.
  vi. 6, 9.  Mark, x. 13.




XIV.  THE HASTY MOTHER.


I.  How common!  Yet the Bible commands us not to be hasty.  Eccles. vii.
9.

  A woman’s ornament should be a meek, and quiet spirit (1 Pet. iii. 4),
  and a nurse is mentioned as being especially gentle to the little ones.
  1 Thess. ii. 7.

II.  Observe the angry woman,

  How foolish!  Prov. xiv. 29; xxix. 20.

  How provoking!  Prov. xv. 1.

  How wearing!  Prov. xix. 13; xxvii. 15; xxi. 19.

  Drives the husband from his fireside.

  Sets an evil example to the children.

  Often does in her haste, what she heartily repents at leisure.

III.  Therefore,

  1.  Put away anger.  Eph. iv. 31.

  Do not be _soon_ angry.  Prov. xiv. 17.  Jam. i. 19.

  ‘Meekness gives smooth answers to rough questions.’

  2.  Exercise self-control.  Prov. xxv. 28; xvi. 32.

  3.  Teach it to your children.

III.  Remember, a hasty temper is a _fault_, not a _misfortune_.
Accustom yourself, and your children, to view it in its right light.

IV.  Ask help from God to subdue it, for temper is hard to conquer, and
meekness is a fruit of the Spirit.  Gal. v. 22.  Matt. v. 5.

  You _need help_, for there is much to provoke a wife, and mother.

  You _need help_, for you are very weak, but you can do all things
  through Christ who strengtheneth you.  Phil. iv. 13.




XV.  THE WEARY MOTHER.


Many things below make a mother weary.

The blessing of _rest_ is chiefly future.

Notice various things that often make mothers weary, and the remedy for
them.

              CAUSE.                             REMEDY.
I.  Weary with cares and            I.  Do not carry your burden
sorrows—ready to exclaim, ‘My       alone.  Ps. lv. 22.
burden is greater than I can
bear.’                                1 Pet. v. 7.  Jer. xxxi. 25.

                                      _Hereafter_ rest.

                                      Psa. xciv. 13.  Isa. xiv. 3.
II.  Weary with work.               II.  Make more use of the rest of
                                    the Sabbath.

                                      Exod. xx. 8.

                                      Called ‘Sabbath of _rest_.’

                                      Lev. xxiii. 3.

                                      _Hereafter_.  Heb. iv. 9.
III.  Weary with sickness.          III.  Comfort in time of
                                    sickness.  Ps. xli. 3.
  Job, vii. 3, 4.  Isa. xxxviii.
  12, 14.                             Great alleviation in true
                                      spirit of submission.
  May be your own, your
  husband’s, your children’s.         _Hereafter_.  Isa. xxxiii. 24.
                                      Rev. xxi. 4.
  Wearisome nights of pain, or
  watching.
IV.  Weary of your sins.            IV.  Come with your sins to
                                    Christ.
  Ps. vi. 6; xxxviii. 4.
                                      Matt. xi. 28, 29.
  Oft repented.
                                      _Hereafter_.  Rev. xxi. 27.
  Oft repeated.
V.  Weary with your children’s      V.  Correct, and they shall give
sins.                               you rest.  Prov. xxix. 17.

                                      Consider Christ, _lest ye be
                                      weary_.  Heb. xii. 3.

Do you know where to go for rest?  Jer. vi. 16.  Or are you wandering
hither and thither in vain, having forgotten your resting-place?  Jer. l.
6.  Remember, it is only to those who are in Christ that these promises
of rest apply.

It is only His own sheep who can say, ‘He maketh me to _lie down in green
pastures_.’

To others there is no rest here, or hereafter, for, ‘The wicked are like
the troubled sea, when it _cannot rest_. . . .  There is no peace, saith
my God, to the wicked.’  Isa. lvii. 20, 21.




XVI.  THE CARELESS MOTHER.


                            Isa. xxxii. 9–13.

Motherless children are often uncared for.  No one ‘_naturally_ cares for
their state.’  No child with a mother _ought_ to be so.  But too often
mothers are careless about—

I.  Their _minds_.

  No schooling—no teaching—no training—no Sunday School.  Cares not
  whether in time, or too late—regular or truant, &c., &c.

II.  Their _respectability_, and _associates_.

  Will take in bad lodgers, hire bad characters to help at the wash-tub
  because they can be had cheaper than the respectable, forgetting that
  ‘a good name is rather to be chosen than great riches.’  Prov. xxii. 1.
  Eccles. vii. 1.

  What guilty carelessness!

III.  Their _happiness_.

  What misery here awaits a neglected child!

  What woe hereafter!

IV.  Their _souls_.

  To a parent guilty of this carelessness, it is said, ‘His blood will I
  require at thine hand.’  Ezek. iii. 18, 19; xxxiii. 6.

  Have you ever lost a child, for whose soul you never cared?  Pray Ps.
  li. 14.

  _This_ arises from want of real religion.

  You do not know the immense value of a soul.

  Would you be thus careless of an earthly treasure?  Would you not watch
  it—lock it up—guard it with a jealous eye?  Your child’s soul a
  treasure passing all price.  Yet you allow Satan to steal it—bad
  companions to corrupt it—ruin it yourself by neglect.  A thing
  neglected is ruined.

  Keep in view the judgment day.

  Will your child then say, ‘No man cared for my soul’—‘even my _mother_
  cared not that I perished!’




XVII.  THE CAREFUL MOTHER.


I.  Careful in her _house_.

  No waste.  Prov. xviii. 9.  John, vi. 12.

  Yet not stingy.  No needless expense—makes a little go a long way.

II.  Careful over her _children_.

  Their _bodies_—health—clothes—future.  1 Tim. v. 8.  2 Cor. xii. 14.

  Provident Club.  Penny Bank, &c.

  Their _minds_.  Gives education suitable to their station.  No fortune
  so good.

  What a disgrace in these days to a mother, if a child cannot read and
  write!

  Their _souls_.  Above all, let not care for the body choke this.  Mark,
  iv. 19.

  Lay up treasure in heaven.  Matt. vi. 20.

III.  Let not careful mother be _too full of care_.

  Not _overcharged_.  Luke, xxi. 34; x. 41, 42.

  ‘Live not in careful suspense.’  Luke, xii. 29 (margin).

  Cast your care on One who can bear it.  1 Pet. v. 7.  Phil. iv. 6.  He
  will not despise it, ‘_for He careth for you_.’

  For the future, take this for your motto when over-pressed by cares and
  trials, ‘The Lord will provide.’  Gen. xxii, 14.  Philip, iv. 19.  Ps.
  xxiii. 1.




XVIII.  THE PATIENT MOTHER.


A mother has, in a peculiar degree, ‘need of patience.’  Heb. x. 36.

I.  In trials of temper.  1 Cor. xiii. 4, 5, 7.  Prov. xiv. 17.

II.  With your children’s faults.

  Matt. xviii. 22, 35.

  Look back to the days of your childhood.

  Were not you equally trying to your mother?

  Remember your own faults, and God’s patience with you.  He bears long
  with you.

III.  It may be you need patience in bearing with unjust tempers, and
unkind treatment.  1 Pet. ii. 19, 23.  Ps. xxxvii. 7.

IV.  For answers to prayer.

  Syro-Phenician mother.  Matt. xv. 22, 28.  Jam. v. 7, 8.  ‘Tarry thou
  the Lord’s leisure.’

V.  In tribulation, sickness, and poverty.  Rom. xii. 12.  Jam. v. 10,
11.  Luke, xxi. 19.




XIX.  THE FIRM MOTHER.


I.  To obey is a child’s duty.

  Exod. xx. 12.  Eph. vi. 1.  Col. iii. 20.

II.  This obedience should be—

  1.  Implicit.

  2.  Unquestioning.

  3.  Immediate.

  4.  In manner, and spirit.

  5.  From love.

  6.  In absence, as well as presence.

  7.  To the _mother_ as well as the _father_.

  Prov. i. 8; vi. 20; xv. 20.  Lev. xix. 3.  _e.g._ Luke, ii. 51.

  This is most important.  In the Bible no difference is drawn between
  the authority of the father and mother.

III.  A promise attached to obedience.

  Exod. xx. 12.  Eph. vi. 2.  Jer. xxxv. 18, 19.

IV.  To disobey is sin.

  Deut. xxi. 18, 21.  Ezek. xxii. 7.  Rom. i. 30.  2 Tim. iii. 2.  1 Sam.
  ii. 25.

V.  A punishment attached to disobedience.

  Deut. xxvii. 16.  Prov. xxx. 17.

VI.  It is a parent’s _duty_ to enforce obedience.  Allowed disobedience
brings misery into the home. 1 Tim. iii. 4; v. 4.

  Eli.  1 Sam. ii. 23.

  David.  1 Kings, i. 6.

How solemn then, Mothers, is your responsibility.

How earnest should be your prayers that _your_ commands may agree with
_God’s_.  Gen. xviii. 19.  Deut. xxxii. 46.  Eph. vi. 1.

                                * * * * *

Seek for wisdom in commanding.

Firmness in insisting.




XX.  CONVERSION.


We meet time after time at our Mothers’ Meeting, but how few of us are
truly converted, and changed in heart.

  Ask yourselves this night two questions.

I.  Do you earnestly seek your own conversion?  ‘What shall it profit
you, if you gain the whole world, and lose your own soul?’

  Mark, viii. 36, 37.

  Delay not.  Isa. lix. 1.

II.  Do you earnestly seek for the conversion of your children?##

1.  Perhaps you do not _care_ for it.  You do not seek _first_ for them
the kingdom of God.  Matt. vi. 33.  Be honest to yourselves in this
matter.  Are you ready to give up for them anything that keeps them from
Christ?

  Matt. v. 29, 30.

2.  Perhaps you do not _pray_ for it.

  Observe how the mother prayed.  Matt. xv. 22, 28.  David.  1 Chron.
  xxix. 19.  Job, i. 5.

3.  Perhaps you place _hindrances_ in the way.

  You draw them to the world instead of to Christ.  Matt. xviii. 6.

4.  Perhaps you forget the necessity of the _Holy Spirit’s power_.  Isa.
xliv. 3, 4, 5.

  Pray this night for the outpouring of the Holy Spirit upon
  yourselves—your husbands—your children.  Matt. vii. 11.

  Remember, ‘except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye
  shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.’  Matt. xviii. 3.




XXI.  THOU, GOD, SEEST ME.


God’s penetrating eye.  Rev. i 14.

I.  He sees _all_.  Prov. v. 21.

  Bad and good.  Prov. xv. 3.

II.  _Where_ does He see you?

1.  He sees the mother _in secret_.  Matt. vi. 6.

  Each secret prayer—each sigh—each tear.

  No privacy from Him.  Eccles. xii. 14.  Ps. xix. 12.  Jer. xxiii. 24.

  Many would give worlds to hide from God.

2.  In her _daily path_.  Job, xxxiv. 21.  Ps. cxxxix. 3.

3.  In _every circumstance_.  2 Chron. xvi. 9.

III.  _What_ does He see?

1.  The mother’s _heart_.  Jer. xx. 12.  1 Sam. xvi. 7.  Her
motives—desires—yearnings.

  You may deceive _others_.  You may even deceive _yourselves_, ‘but all
  things are naked, and opened unto the eyes of Him with whom we have to
  do.’  Heb. iv. 13.  Luke, xvi. 15.

2.  The mother’s _sins_.  Ps. xix. 12; xc. 8.  Isa. lvii. 18.  Amos, v.
12.

  Sins of omission and commission.

3.  The mother’s _sorrows_.  Exod. iii. 7.

  Both inward and outward trials.  2 Kings, xx. 5.  Ps. cxlii. 3.  Acts,
  vii. 34.

  There are many sorrows it is not well for a wife and mother to speak of
  to others, but take comfort!  Your Saviour knows each grief—each
  trouble—each tear for your own sins or the sins of others.

4.  The mother’s _need_.  Matt. vi. 8, 32.

  And He promises to supply it.  Ps. xxiii. 1.  Philip, iv. 19.




XXII.  JESUS THE MOTHER’S FRIEND.


I.  Mothers need a friend!

  In joy and in sorrow, in dark hours and in light, in life and in death,
  they need a Friend who is always the same—even ‘the same yesterday,
  to-day, and for ever.’

II.  You may have such a Friend.

  1.  Even Jesus.  Prov. xviii. 24.  John, xv. 15.  The Friend of
  sinners.  Matt. xi. 19.

  2.  He loveth always.  Prov. xvii. 17.

  3.  He is faithful.  Prov. xviii. 24.  John, xiii. 1.

III.  Is He _your_ Friend?

  Can you point to Jesus and say, ‘This is my Beloved, and this is my
  Friend?’  Cant. v. 16.

  If not, do not rest until you can say so.

IV.  If Jesus _is_ your Friend.

1.  Go to Him in _trouble_.  ‘Pour out your heart before Him.’  John, xi.
3, 11.

  In sorrow lean on His bosom, as John did.  John, xiii. 23.

  ‘He weeps with those who weep.’

2.  Go to Him in _joy_, for He ‘rejoices with those who do rejoice.’

3.  Do not have hard thoughts of Him because He afflicts.

  ‘Faithful are the wounds of a friend.’  Prov. xxvii. 6.  Ps. cxli. 5.

  He sympathises in every sorrow.  Heb. iv. 15.

  And has borne your griefs.  Isa. liii. 4.




XXIII.  HELPS FOR MOTHERS.
1.


A mother has many hindrances in seeking Christ.  She needs much help from
the means of grace.  To obtain this is often difficult, and requires much
effort.  Outward means are, therefore, too often neglected.  If you would
grow in grace this must not be.

Be diligent, therefore, in the use of—

I.  Daily prayer.  Matt. vi. 6, 11.

  No business should prevent this.  David had the business of a kingdom
  upon him, nevertheless, he says, ‘Evening, and morning, and at noon,
  will I pray.’  Ps. lv. 17.

II.  Daily Scripture reading.  Acts, xvii. 11.  Ps. cxix. 103.

III.  Family prayer.

  Judgment pronounced on those who neglect family religion.  Jer. x. 25.

  Promise to united prayer.  Matt. xviii. 19, 20.

IV.  Attendance on the public means of grace.

  Observe the command.  Deut. xii. 12, 18.  Heb. x. 25.

  What a blessing rested on it in the case of Lydia.  Acts, xvi. 13, 15.

  There are great difficulties to the mother of a young family in going
  to Church on Sunday, but make an effort to overcome them.  This can
  generally be done if husband and wife make a _united effort_.

  If you are truly hungering and thirsting after righteousness, you will
  earnestly use every means for obtaining the bread and the water of
  life.  If you are careless in this respect, it is because there is no
  real hunger, no craving of soul for heavenly food.




XXIV.  HELPS FOR MOTHERS.
2.


We will notice this evening three more things which are, or ought to be,
‘helps’ to mothers on the heavenly race.

I.  Husbands and wives should be _mutual_ helps, (see Marriage Service)
‘for the mutual help and comfort the one of the other.’

  Gen. ii. 18.  1 Pet. iii. 7.  Eph. v. 28, 29.

  Fellow-pilgrims, fellow-sufferers, fellow-travellers they _must be_;
  but what an unspeakable joy is it when they are also fellow-helpers,
  fellow-labourers, fellow-heirs, fellow-citizens!

                                * * * * *

    ‘O happy house, where man and wife are one,
       Thro’ love of Thee, in spirit, heart, and mind;
    Together joined by holy bands, which none,
       Not death itself, can sever or unbind;
    Where both on thee unfailingly depend,
       In weal and woe, in good and evil days,
    And hope with Thee eternity to spend;
       In sweet communion and eternal praise.’

II.  Christian friends.

  2 Cor. i. 24.  Rom. xvi. 3.

  What comfort and _help_ may be derived from the visits, counsels, and
  sympathy of a Christian neighbour, a kind and devoted district visitor,
  or minister.

  Especially may Christian friends help each other by _prayer_.  2 Cor.
  i. 11.  Jam. v. 16, 18.  Matt. xviii. 19.

  How valuable is a Prayer Union, such as we have connected with our
  Mothers’ Meeting.

III.  But lastly remember that these ‘helps’ are worth nothing unless you
have _the Lord for your Helper_.  Ps. liv. 4.  Heb. xiii. 6.  Exod.
xviii. 4.

  He is different to any earthly helper, for He is a Helper at all times,
  and in all circumstances.

  In trouble.  Ps. xlvi. 1.

  To the widow.  Ps. lxviii. 5.

  To the fatherless.  Ps. x. 14.

  Take, therefore, this short prayer and use it in your daily life,
  ‘Lord, be _Thou_ my helper.’  Lift up this prayer in the midst of your
  work—of temptation—of trial, and you will be enabled to add, ‘My heart
  trusted in Him, and _I am helped_!’  Ps. xxviii. 7.




XXV.  TEACH YOUR CHILDREN.


A mother may not have much time for instruction, or be very capable of
teaching, but she should make it her daily duty to give her children some
instruction in the Scriptures.  She may know but little herself, but let
not this discourage her; for in watering others she shall herself be
watered.  Prov. xi. 25.

I.  Teach, seeking the help of the Holy Spirit.  Isa. liv. 13.  John,
xvi. 13.  Luke, xii. 12.  Job, xxxvi. 22.  Ps. xciv. 12.

II.  Teach in the spirit of prayer.

  Eph. vi. 18, 19.

  Remembering these words, ‘Without Me ye can do nothing.’  John, xv. 5.

III.  Teach, leaning on the promise.

  Isa. lv. 10, 11.  Eccles. xi. 1, 6.

IV.  Teach, expecting a result.

  Ps. cxxvi. 6.  Prov. xxii. 6.  Gen. xviii. 19.  2 Tim. i. 5; iii. 15.




XXVI.  THE PARTING PLACE, AND THE MEETING PLACE.


The following circumstance took place not long after the last meeting.
Two mothers, who were both present at the Class, about a fortnight after
met in the Cemetery, sorrowing at their children’s graves.  Each had
during that interval lost a child, but not having heard of each other’s
trouble, the meeting was unexpected.

On this occasion the following subject was taken.

I.  The parting place—the child’s death-bed.  This is,

  1.  A parting place.

  All must die alone.  The mother may have watched over her child with
  untiring care during its years of infancy, the trials of youth, and the
  snares and cares of riper years, but here they _must part_.  2 Sam.
  xii. 15, 23.

  2.  A weeping place.  Gen. xxi. 16.

  2 Sam. xii. 21.  Jer. xxxi. 15.

  Mark, v. 38.  Luke, vii. 13.  Not _wrong_, for Jesus wept at the grave
  of Lazarus.  John, xi. 35.

  3.  A birth place

  To a new and heavenly life.  But not so to _all_.  To _some_, namely,
  to those who have indeed been born again.  Luke, xvi. 22; and to babes.
  Isa. xl. 11.

  Contrast David’s sorrow for his infant, (2 Sam. xii. 23) with his
  sorrow for Absalom, 2 Sam. xix. 4.  To one death was the door of
  _life_, to the other of _death_.

II.  The meeting place—the judgment-seat.  Rev. xx. 12.  Rom. xiv. 10.

  You cannot avoid it.

  It will be.

  1.  To all a place of recognition.

  The child you led to Christ—the child you led astray.  The child you
  trained for heaven—the child you trained for hell.  _All_ will be
  there.

  2.  To many a place of weeping.  Matt. xxv. 30.  Luke, vi. 25.

  3.  To many a place of rejoicing.  Matt. xxv. 34.

  Believing mother!  Your night of weeping will then be over, your
  morning of joy will dawn, of which the sun will never set!  Ps. xxx. 5.

  Which will it be to you—a meeting-place of joy or sorrow?

  May you and your children be so united in Christ here, that you may
  both part and meet in peace!




XXVII.  THE MOTHER’S DEATH-BED.


On the occasion of the death of a young mother, which took place not long
after the first meeting in the new year.

I.  How near it may be.  1 Sam. xx. 3.  Job, xxi. 13.

  In the midst of life we are in death.

  We have had a solemn lesson.  Almost the youngest in our class cut down
  the first.

II.  The hour of death is an hour

1.  Of deep solemnity.

  It is a dark valley.  Ps. xxiii. 4.  Job. x. 21.

2.  Of much regret.

  Conscience awake, looks back on duties undone—things done—words
  spoken—words unsaid, &c.

3.  Often of great suffering.  Ps. cxvi. 3.

  Not the time to begin to seek the Lord.

4.  Of parting.  Philip, i. 23, 24.

  Must die alone.  Must leave husband and children.  They may go with you
  to the edge of the river, but no further.

5.  Of weeping.  Gen. xxxv. 18; xxiii. 2.  John, xi. 31.  2 Sam. xix. 4.

6.  It is an hour when Christ, and _Christ alone_, can save you.

  Thus we pray, ‘In the hour of death, and in the day of judgment, Good
  Lord, deliver us.’

  His rod and staff alone can help you.  Ps. xxiii. 4.

  He alone can take away the sting from death.  1 Cor. xv. 55, 57.  Rom.
  viii. 38, 39.  Isa. xliii. 2.

  It is only if washed in His blood, and clothed in His righteousness,
  that you need not fear to appear before God.




XXVIII.  NEW YEAR’S DAY.


    ‘I must work the work of Him that sent me while it is day: the night
    cometh, when no man can work.’—John, ix. 4.

    Time _past_—is gone, thou canst not it recall.
    Time _is_—thou hast, improve the portion small.
    Time_ future_—is not, and may never be.
    Time _present_—is the only time for thee!

Therefore,

I.  _Hear to-day_. (Ps. xcv. 7.)  ‘See that ye refuse not Him that
speaketh.’

  _Exhort to-day_ your children.  (Heb. iii. 13.)

  _Work to-day_ (John, ix. 4) for your children’s souls.

  Never postpone.  Jam. iv. 13.  2 Cor. vi. 2.

  _Now_ it is high time to wake out of sleep.  Rom. xiii. 11.

II.  Because the _night_ cometh when no man can work.  John, ix. 4.

  The night of _your_ death—your _husband’s_ death—your _children’s_
  death.

  Perhaps this sentence has gone forth against you, or yours, ‘This year
  thou shalt die.’  Jer. xxviii. 16.

  Luke, xii. 20; xiii. 7.

                                * * * * *

  Mothers, _awake_! to your own, and your children’s danger.

  _Awake_ to the importance of safety in Christ.

  Mothers, _work_! for yourselves, for your families.

  ‘Labour not for the meat which perisheth, but for that meat which
  endureth unto everlasting life.’  John, vi. 27.




XXIX.  FIRST MEETING IN THE YEAR.


I.  Look backwards on the past year.

1.  On your _sins_.

  They are many—great—mighty.  You need forgiveness, and Christ is
  _ready_ to forgive.  Neh. ix. 17.  Make this your prayer for the past
  year, ‘Lord, pardon mine iniquity, for _it is great_.’  Ps. xxv. 11.

  On your sins towards your _husbands_.  Provocation—temper—carelessness
  of their comfort—an unyielding spirit.  Again must you say, ‘Pardon
  mine iniquity, for it is _great_.’

  On your sins towards your _children_.  Neglect—bad
  example—prayerlessness—cross tempers—hasty slaps.  Again you must say,
  ‘Pardon mine iniquity, for it is _great_.’

2.  On your _sorrows_.

  Poverty—sickness—death.  Yet your sorrows not so many as your sins.
  How have you been helped through them!  Have you _profited_?  Heb. xii.
  10.  God has been teaching you, have you learnt the lesson?

3.  On your mercies.

  You can count your sorrows.  Try and count your mercies, they are more
  than can be numbered.  Ps. xl. 5.  How undeserved they were!  You have
  counted your days of sickness—have you those of health?  Your hours of
  mourning—have you those of joy?  Your children taken—have you counted
  your children spared? &c., &c.  Were you thankful?  Gen. xxxii. 10.

II.  Look forward on the opening year.

  On what?  Can you tell?

  How uncertain, you know not what will be even on the morrow.  Jam. iv.
  4.  Prov. xxvii. 1.  Who will be taken?  Whose husband?  Whose child?

  You know not.

  Therefore, ‘be ye also ready, for in such an hour as ye _think not_ the
  Son of Man cometh.’  Matt. xxiv. 44.

  Can _you_ say, ‘Even so come, Lord Jesus, _come quickly_?’




XXX.  LAST MEETING IN THE YEAR.
THE CRADLE AND THE GRAVE.


God has been speaking to us during the past year.  Two mothers have gone
to their long home, and ten of our children.  Let us reply, ‘Speak, Lord,
for thy servant heareth.’  1 Sam. iii. 9.

God speaks to us from the cradle, and the grave.

I.  From the _cradle_, and says,

  1.  ‘Take this child, and nurse it for _me_.’  Exod. ii. 9.

  2.  Pray for it—train it—love it—comfort it.

  3.  He speaks in a voice of _comfort_ from our cradles to our souls, if
  we are His people.  ‘Mother, can you forget this sucking child?  Yea,
  you _may_ forget, yet will not I forget you.’  Isa. xlix. 15.

  Again—Do you comfort your babe—do you soothe its fears? do you wipe its
  tears?  Even so, believing mother, will God comfort you.  Isa. lxvi.
  13.  Yes, even ‘wipe away all tears from your eyes.’

  Oh! precious voice from the cradle to your soul!

II.  God speaks from the _grave_—and says,

1.  ‘Give an account of thy stewardship, for thou mayst be no longer
steward.’  Luke, xvi. 2.

2.  ‘Time is short.’

  1 Cor. vii. 29.  1 Pet. iv. 7.

  What a little life—gone as a spark!

  You may die—your children may die—or Christ may come.  Do not say,
  ‘to-morrow.’  Jam. iv. 13.

3.  ‘Be ye also ready.’

  Matt. xxiv. 44.

4.  Your child shall rise again.

  ‘I am the resurrection and the life.’  John, xi. 25. (See Burial
  Service.)  Jer. xxxi. 16, 17.

  If both parent and child are in Christ, what a blessed reunion, for He
  adds, ‘Whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall _never die_!’

  If it should be the Lord’s will during the coming year again to take
  many of our little ones from their mothers’ arms, and to lay them in
  His own bosom, may each sorrowing one amongst us be enabled to say in
  the spirit of true and loving submission, ‘The Lord gave, and the Lord
  hath taken away; _blessed be the name of the Lord_!’

                                * * * * *

                                 LONDON:
          Printed by JOHN STRANGEWAYS, Castle St. Leicester Sq.




By the same Author,
_Short Tracts for Mothers_.


No. 1.  Give an Account of thy Stewardship.

2.  Praying Mothers.

3.  In the Morning Sow thy Seed.

4.  Shine as Lights in your Families.

5.  Parental Affection.

6.  Cast thy Burden upon the Lord.

                    THE SIX TRACTS IN A PACKET, 4_d._




By the Rev. E. HOARE,


_Vicar of Trinity_, _Tunbridge Wells_, _& Hon. Canon of Canterbury_.

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