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diff --git a/40253-8.txt b/40253-8.txt deleted file mode 100644 index b239925..0000000 --- a/40253-8.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,1315 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of Peachmonk, by John Eyerman - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - - -Title: Peachmonk - A Serio-Comic Detective Tale in Which No Fire-Arms Are - Used and No One is Killed - -Author: John Eyerman - -Release Date: July 16, 2012 [EBook #40253] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PEACHMONK *** - - - - -Produced by Robert Cicconetti, Dave Hobart and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - - - - - - - - - - PEACHMONK - - A SERIO-COMIC DETECTIVE TALE IN WHICH NO - FIRE-ARMS ARE USED AND NO ONE IS KILLED - BEING A THREE DAYS EPISODE IN THE LIFE OF - THE DUKE OF BELLEVILLE AS RELATED BY - LORD EDWARD LYNDON - - - JOHN EYERMAN - - - NEW YORK - 1917 - - - - -The fabric of this tale is based largely upon the use of Book-Titles, and -the names, several names in connection, or expressions in CAPITALS, which -indicate these titles, should in no way interfere with the continuous -reading of the story. - -No Title, of either one or more words, is used more than once, unless -such title is represented by more than one Author. - -Approximately, Nine Hundred Book-Titles have been used. - - -No Literary Merit is claimed for this Tale, as none has been attempted. -The following Letter explains itself: - - - BARCHESTER TOWERS, - KENILWORTH. - Saturday. - - Dear Eyerman: - - When we were talking the other night at MRS. PERKIN'S BALL, I - was just about to ask you a favor, when OUR MUTUAL FRIEND, - ADDISON, with his usual lack of GOOD FORM FOR ALL OCCASIONS, - decided to fasten himself to us: AFTERWARD, AT THE CASA - NAPOLEON, THE AMERICANS tied me up. I am glad to say that I am - now FAR FROM THE MADDING CROWDS, and VILETTE, THE BEAUTIFUL - WRETCH that she is, has urged me to write you. - - When Scarlett's eye-troubles began he decided to amuse himself - by dictating to MISS MARJORIBANKS, THE STORY OF MY LIFE, as he - called it * * * * Ten days ago, and to my AMAZEMENT, he was - ordered to INDIA and his work is not completed, and I am no - good at that kind of thing. I want YOU to undertake the WORK, - and Scarlett wants you too. Don't refuse, please. - - * * * * * - - Present or absent, I trust, my dear fellow, that you will - think of me always as your sincere friend. - - Belleville. - - - - -My PRINTERS have informed me that ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, it will be best -to omit the Introduction, as it is "NOT IN IT" with the tale, WHICH was -to have followed. - -NOW, at first, I considered this all STUFF AND NONSENSE, for I am sure I -know MORE about CLEVER TALES, than they do about printed MATTER, and I -believe that I am considered one of the best DESCRIPTIVE WRITERS in GREAT -BRITAIN, and certainly can write SKETCHES AND STORIES; however, "IT'S UP -TO YOU," but when the printers told me that the question would be asked -"WHO WROTE THAT?" to be followed by the remark "IT'S GREAT TO BE CRAZY," -I decided that as MY BROTHER AND I are PALS FIRST, FOR HIS SAKE, the -Introduction, AS A MATTER OF COURSE, must be omitted. - - - - - CONTENTS - - I: BEGINNING OF THE TALE - II: INTRODUCES THE HERO - III: INTRODUCES MARJORIE - IV: INTRODUCES THE VILLAIN - V: WHAT THE VILLAIN DID - VI: INTRODUCES THE HEROINE - VII: THE CRISIS - VIII: THE GRAND FINALE - - - - -PEACHMONK - - - - -I: BEGINNING OF THE TALE. - - -When one sees THE HONEY BEE constructing his little hexagonal CELL, and -the SPIDERS weaving their webs and bridges, with all the accuracy of the -ENGINEER, which operations are not ACCIDENTALS, one is inclined to ask: -is one MAKING THE MOST OF ONE'S MIND? Candidly: I DON'T KNOW: perhaps -not; but I do know from a scientific standpoint, the comparison is not -permissible; still it makes ONE think. However, what is most apparent to -me is that I am in THE CLUTCH OF CIRCUMSTANCES, and I have to write this -tale; THEREFORE, ONCE UPON A TIME, as all stories should begin, a certain -successful debutante, known as LADY ROSE'S DAUGHTER, THE LADY EVELYN, sat -in her boudoir in THE HOUSE THAT JACK BUILT, IN LONDON TOWN, looking at -THE FACE IN THE GIRANDOLE, and listening to THE CHIMES of the SILVER -BELLS, announcing THE ELEVENTH-HOUR. This room, like THE CIRCULAR STUDY -on the floor below, was hung with GOBELINS, between which, at regular -intervals, were hung original DRAWINGS OF GAINSBOROUGH, the floor being -covered with that world-famous textile, THE CARPET FROM BAGDAD, while -upon a magnificent LOUIS XIV stand were some exquisite specimens of -SALT-GLAZED STONEWARE, stamped with THE GREEN SEAL. - -Through THE OPEN SHUTTERS came the VOICE OF THE STREET, and from distant -KENNEDY SQUARE, the occasional bark of THE GOLDEN-GREYHOUND, -intermingled with the soft lapping noise of THE MOVING OF THE WATERS in -THE POND IN THE MARSHY MEADOW. - -MAMZELLE FIFINE, her ladyship's maid, was in the act of affixing THE -JEWEL OF THE SEVEN STARS to her ladyship's beautiful new Peqiun CREATION, -when VIVIETTE, one of the parlour maids entered, carrying a box. -"MILADI," said THE EXPERT MAID-SERVANT, "this box was left but a moment -ago and DENIS DUVAL told me to bring it to your ladyship at once, as THE -MESSENGER said it contained FAMILY SECRETS; there is a key in this sealed -envelope." - -THE VERMILION BOX, upon being opened with THE DIAMOND KEY, disclosed A -RED LILY, to which was attached a card bearing the short inscription, -"LEST WE FORGET," and the INITIALS ONLY, TO M. L. G. - -NOW, the Lady Evelyn, being A DIPLOMATIC WOMAN, NOWADAYS, not unusual, -expressed her astonishment in but seven WORDS, "AT LAST, THE TRUTH ABOUT -THE CASE," and continuing said, "Viviette, draw THE CRIMSON BLIND, see -that MY STUDY FIRE is lighted, and ask ANN BOYD, the housekeeper, to come -to me at once." - -The housekeeper entered almost immediately. - -"Boyd," said HER LADYSHIP, "I shall postpone MY IRISH JOURNEY, TO-DAY; I -believe that before the TWELFTH NIGHT from now, I shall know who this -GABRIELLE TRANSGRESSOR is, in fact I intend to know if it take FIVE YEARS -TO FIND OUT; go to the Circular Study, and consult the last WHO'S WHO IN -MUSIC AND DRAMA, and let me know what it says about MADEMOISELLE CELESTE -of the Gaiety THEATRE; then telephone 2835 MAYFAIR, and ask WERNER, THE -COUNT'S CHAUFFEUR to go to number NINETY-THREE, MANSFIELD PARK, to-night -at nine o'clock, and finally tell BETTY THE SCRIBE to write a note of -acceptance to the private séance of VERA THE MEDIUM; and this afternoon, -if you care to, you may take your sister HELEN'S BABIES, SUSANNA AND SUE, -to WUTHERING HEIGHTS to see the HYPOTEMNODON, or, if you prefer, to -WAVERLEY to visit your UNCLE REMUS AND BR'ER RABBIT." - - - - -II: INTRODUCES THE HERO. - - -THE Duke of Belleville, having arrived at THE STAGE DOOR of the Gaiety -Theatre, just ten minutes late, had failed to keep his appointment, and -had been informed by the door-man MR. PRATT that Mademoiselle Celeste had -left word that he was to go on to the Savoy, where she expected to have -supper and wanted the Duke to join the party. - -The Duke, somewhat annoyed, but being made of THE RIGHT STUFF, as let us -hope all gentlemen are, merely remarked: - -"I shall go IN SEARCH OF MADEMOISELLE" and turning, he pushed his way -through A MOTLEY crowd, the usual TYPES FROM CITY STREETS, regained his -motor, at the same time deciding to FIRST go to his chambers, ROUND THE -CORNER IN GAY STREET, to have a little chat with his friend, HENRY -ESMOND, who had adjoining chambers and who was THE FIRST SECRETARY to THE -PRIME MINISTER, and who was leaving on the morrow for EQUATORIAL AMERICA -to study THE NEGRO PROBLEM and the AFTERMATH OF SLAVERY. - -AT THE OPEN DOOR to his chambers, the Duke was met by his man, Jameson, -who said, - -"There is a LADY awaiting your Grace." - -"Well, Jameson, who is THE MIDNIGHT GUEST?" - -"I really don't know, your Grace, THE MYSTERIOUS STRANGER is closely -veiled and will not give her name." - -"Very well, there is no ALTERNATIVE, I'll see her, and, Jameson, remain -within call." - -"GOOD EVENING, MY LADY OF DOUBT," said the Duke, "may I ask to -whom--great heavens, Evelyn, what are you doing here at this time of -NIGHT? Surely the WORLD'S END IS NEAR; WHAT WILL PEOPLE SAY? Your -independence, to say the least, is somewhat disconcerting; why not -telephone?" - -"JACK, you are positively hateful; I could not telephone my message--no -EAVESDROPPER, I trust--I believe I am on the verge of discovering LORD -CAMMERLEIGH'S SECRET, and I want you to accompany ME to-morrow to THE -MATRIMONIAL BUREAU of THE PRINCESS DEHRA, that SORCERESS OF ROME, who has -many LITTLE STORIES, LAID UP IN LAVENDER and can always find THE MAN -HIGHER UP." - -"OH, I SAY, Evelyn, you certainly do lead A SINGULAR LIFE; you know I am -not interested in these so-called TRUE STORIES OF CRIME and most -unfortunately, too, I am taking THE 10.12 EXPRESS to Brighton; however, I -shall be very pleased, you know, to go with you on Monday." - -"Thank you, JACK, but I AM AFRAID that is quite impracticable, and I am -sorely disappointed: you certainly took more than a passive interest in -the recovery of THE EUSTACE DIAMONDS; now, it seems you never have the -time for anything; of course it is well known that THE BEAUTY, this -Gaiety star, always goes to BRIGHTON on Sunday, and I am told, by the -10.12 Express; I really do not understand your INFATUATION for this WILD -WINGS; but I dare say it's the WAY OF MAN, IN THE ARENA of course; it's -THE TREND of the times: however, MAJOR VIGOUREAUX will be only too -delighted to go with me, but I wanted you, you foolish boy, you are -certainly A CHANGED MAN, and I do hope you are not PLAYING WITH FIRE, -but...." - -"Beg pardon, your Grace," interrupted Jameson, entering, -"Detective-Inspector Morgan is below, and desires particularly to see -your Grace." - -"Let him come up, Jameson, and conduct the lady to the North lift." - -"And, BY THE WAY, Evelyn, I'm opening the Eaton Square house and shall -have a surprise for you: here, don't forget THE VANITY BOX." - -"Well, JACK, good-bye, I suppose I'm turned out, MARION'S VACATION, -begins next week, and I'm taking her to THE DOCTOR'S LITTLE GIRL, -ELIZABETH HOBART AT EXETER HALL." - -"Inspector Morgan," announces Jameson. - -"Sorry to trouble you, your Grace: the lady...." - -"Now, look here, MY MAN, the lady is my cousin." - -"EXCUSE ME, your Grace, I quite understand: no harm intended: I thought I -recognized the LITTLE LADY as one of the LIGHT FINGERED GENTRY; beg -pardon, I'm sure; I came particularly to ask your Grace's aid regarding -the so-called MYSTERIOUS MR. SABIN; we believe he was THE MAN INSIDE, THE -MYSTERY OF THE MIDDLE-TEMPLE, although fortunately for himself, he keeps -well WITHIN THE LAW; this slippery TENNESSEE SHAD was at lunch to-day -with Miss Celeste of the Gaiety--nothing wrong with your Grace, I -hope--great show on there; your Grace probably recalls the timely advice -you gave us regarding THE CARLTON CASE; well, SIR MORTIMER, my chief, had -HOPE that your Grace would again be able to advise us." - -"I fear not, in this case, Morgan, in fact I don't want to stand in -ANOTHER MAN'S SHOES, THE MAN IN THE BASEMENT was really responsible for -that advice." - -"Then I shall INTERVIEW, THE LODGER; WHAT'S HIS NAME, your Grace?" - -"That is OUT OF THE QUESTION, Morgan; you are like the DOG in the hands -of the express company: you've eaten your TAG and don't know where you -are to go; too late; THE PEOPLE DOWNSTAIRS, I am told, left yesterday for -TROIS SEMAINES EN FRANCE, which means, of course, SOJOURNING, SHOPPING -AND STUDYING IN PARIS; and now you must go, as I have an appointment, -long overdue; take a cigar, Morgan, from THE BRASS BOWL, over there, and -IN AFTER YEARS, you will remember that particular brand, as it is pure -HEMP, and if you are going HOME, take that PURPLE FERN to your wife's -MOTHER, for a chance like this only comes ONCE TO EVERY MAN, and GOOD -NIGHT." - - - - -III: INTRODUCES MARJORIE. - - -MARJORIE'S VACATION was fast approaching its end; SHE and her friend -MARIETTA, BY FORCE OF CIRCUMSTANCES, were conducting a flourishing -TYPE-WRITING establishment, JUST BETWEEN THEMSELVES, at THE HOUSE ON -CHERRY STREET, on THE SUNNY SIDE OF THE STREET, so that PASSERS-BY could -see THE WAY UP, and they always allowed themselves, as a VACATION, LITTLE -JOURNEYS of a fortnight's duration IN THAMESLAND or among THE ALPS. - -Marjorie and her very best friend, BETTY STANDISH, were seated under THE -PLUM TREE, but obviously, not at a time when the fruit was over-ripe, in -THE GARDEN AT NO. 19, in that historic spot, CHANTREY LAND, as the old -village of Norton, DERBYSHIRE, is called, having just been served with a -second instalment of TEA, by TILLIE A MENNONITE MAID, who carried with -her, THE GLEAM of LOCAL COLOR. The girls had just had an exceedingly -trying two hours' visit from THE MAYOR'S WIFE, one of THE RAVENELS, and -whose only TOPICS FOR CONVERSATION, IN A NUTSHELL, were invariably IN -DEFENSE of her FAMILY; that she was following IN THE FOOTSTEPS OF THE -BRONTES, and always ended with the statement that her BIG BROTHER, JOHN -HENRY SMITH, THE ARCHDEACON, had ordered the removal of THE OLD PEABODY -PEW, despite THE WARNING OF SEXTON MAGINNIS, that THE MONK'S TREASURE -would not be found in that part of THE LONELY CHURCH of ST. JUDE'S and -to-day, in addition to these thread-bare topics, she announced to her -hearers, that ON GOING TO CHURCH, she had passed AT CLOSE RANGE, LORD -LONDON, and his SISTER CARRIE, taking some STRAY BIRDS and TOY DOGS to -the ABANDONED, HILL-TOP FARM (to see the DOG STARS) and finally, that her -husband, SIR JOHN CONSTANTINE, had always been A SERVANT OF THE PUBLIC: -in fact, with the Mayor's wife, it was always, I MYSELF and my family, -and the young girls were at the point of collapse, when THE CRISIS came, -and THE EGOTISTICAL I, lady took her departure. - -BETTY had picked up the INEVITABLE, MRS. RORER'S COOKBOOK, for she liked -THE FUN OF COOKING, in order to decide WHAT TO HAVE FOR DINNER, and with -the HOPE of making an entire change in the SUNDAY NIGHT SUPPERS, for one -can not subsist solely on BAKERS' BREAD or CREAM TOASTS. - -"BETTY dear," said Marjorie, "I have come to the conclusion that THE CARD -SYSTEM IN THE OFFICE is valueless to US." - -"Of course it is, if you say so; what does Marietta think? but listen; is -that MUSIC or someone in distress?" - -For from HERE AND THERE came the sound of MUSIC; Oh! such NERVE-racking, -BROKEN MUSIC; Marjorie, at once, hastened to THE GIANT'S GATE, the last -remnant of Blunderbore castle, which once occupied the site of the -present house, to find the guilty person, and there discovered a -wretched-looking individual, with two still more wretched-looking -ANIMALS, which the man called THE TEDDY BEARS. - -Now, as Marjorie believed, that in THE TRAINING OF WILD ANIMALS, one -should first secure their FRIENDSHIP, she, WITH THE BEST INTENTION, gave -each of the bears a piece of COTTAGE PIE, and this is no joke, either; -for bears LOVE this particular kind of pie; as a matter of fact, DIDO THE -DANCING BEAR, considers it THE RIGHT STUFF, and much prefers it to the -flesh of THE SALAMANDER, and in A SPIRIT OF MIRTH, she gave THE IMMORTAL -CHARLATAN some SIX PENNY PIECES, to take his PETS to NORTHANGER ABBEY, to -SERENADE the Mayor's wife, for, thought the young girl, harmless REVENGE -is sweet, and moreover she may be AT DEATH'S DOOR, after the trying time -she gave us. - -"Betty, DEAR, I am so happy; we have had so many HAPPY DAYS and yet, I -shall be glad to return to THE CITY OF PLEASURE; is it not strange that -I, A MILLIONAIRE GIRL, should have to earn my own living, because of AN -OPERA AND LADY GRASMERE? but what am I saying? THE DAWN OF A TO-MORROW -is still far away; Horrors; there goes that fearful client of mine across -THE LONG ROAD: I am frightened. WHAT IS COMING? what does she want here?" - -"Marjorie, tell me, what is worrying you? let us be COMRADES IN ARMS; let -me help you as I helped the FIVE LITTLE PEPPERS, IN THE LITTLE BROWN -HOUSE; let me be THE CUSTODIAN of your secret." - -"Yes, dear, I'll confide in you: I AM not, as you have supposed, THE -DAUGHTER OF ANDERSON CROW; I truly believe I am Lord Cammerleigh's CHILD, -that I have a sister, who is none other than CELESTE, THE PRIMADONNA at -the Gaiety Theatre; and from what I have gathered from a WOMAN, the same -woman who just entered THE DEVIL'S GARDEN, who comes to our office to -have senseless letters type-written and apparently to no purpose, so far -as I can understand; I say, I believe my FATHER does not know where we -are and more than that, dare not look for us on account, I say, of what -this wretched woman calls THAT AFFAIR AT ELIZABETH: a question of -WATCHFUL WAITING; it is certainly A DESPERATE CONSPIRACY, and I shall not -rest until THE CONSPIRATORS are UNMASKED AT LAST; but no more to-night: -WHAT'S THE USE, you are CHILLY: put on THE GREENMANTLE and we will stroll -along PIDGIN ISLAND, as far as DARK HOLLOW to see if our little favorite -the PUFFINUS EYERMANI is still there, and TO-MORROW we will go to -SHREWSBURY to see JOEY AT THE FAIR feeding THE DRAGON." - - - - -IV: INTRODUCES THE VILLAIN. - - -SHERLOCK HOLMES once remarked: "By far, the most daring investigator and -most successful elucidator of criminal mysteries is Martin Dhragnet, but -unfortunately, he always gives you the impression of being HALF A ROGUE." -In less than two years' time this same Dhragnet, having had charge of the -famous case of THE INFAMOUS JOHN FRIEND in which THE DETHRONEMENT OF THE -CITY BOSS was a possibility, sold out his principal client, SIR HENDER -O'HALLORAN, V. C., THE MEMBER FOR ARCIS, and with two of the principals, -THE GREIFFENSTEINS, FATHER AND SON, he fled to THE REPUBLIC OF CHILI, -where they BEACHED KEELS, and on the following CHRISTMAS, with EMPTY -POCKETS, and being in need of MONEY to buy the THINGS required on -CHRISTMAS DAY, took a CHANCE by stealing THE GOLDEN DOG of THE PRESIDENT -OF QUEX: escaped capture, under the cover of one of those dark ARIZONA -NIGHTS, by crossing to BOLIVIA, where as ELECTRIC ARCS were in use on -dark nights, they were finally CAGED; but this is THE SECRET HISTORY OF -TO-DAY, and really digression. - -Dhragnet finally escaped WITHIN AN INCH OF HIS LIFE, by gnawing a hole -through the WHITE PINE boards of his TINDERBOX prison, swam the OCEAN and -THE PANAMA CANAL, and with THREE MEN IN A BOAT, crossed the Atlantic to -FRANCE; retired to a secluded spot in BRITTANY: then travelled in CENTRAL -ASIA AND TIBET: played THE HONEST LAWYER, INSIDE THE GERMAN EMPIRE, -hobnobbed with KINGS AND QUEENS on the RIVIERA, and IN MONTE CARLO, met -AN AMERICAN GIRL, called the CAPTIVATING MARY CARSTAIRS, with whom he -became infatuated, as she had a bank account, and notwithstanding the -fact that all her friends said, "Oh: MARY MARY, you are sailing UNCHARTED -SEAS," she was CAUGHT IN THE NET, and they were MARRIED, and the bank -account disappeared, as Dhragnet was given A FREE HAND: after THE STORM, -THE BAD TIMES came; he then formed, secretly of course, THE ROBBERIES CO. -LTD., grew a beard, and drifted to ENGLAND; located in LONDON: formed the -firm of DOMBEY & SON, in Suite 813, NUMBER 101, PARK LANE, as purveyors -of wines and where every BRAND was on sale except the one you wanted. - -Strange as it may seem, Dhragnet, alias Dombey, had given considerable -thought to THE DRINK PROBLEM IN MODERN LIFE, and to all appearances did -nothing more than play DOMINOES and EAT AND GROW THIN; however, he was -merely KEEPING UP APPEARANCES, for the rear room of this suite was the -rendezvous of MANY FAMOUS IMPOSTERS, HYPOCRITES AND SINNERS: THE SHORT -CUT to prison. - - - - -V: WHAT THE VILLAIN DID. - - -IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT, and after strangling with a POISON BELT, THE FOX -TERRIER, asleep BEHIND THE SCREEN, and then removing his BOOTS, the -INTRUDER, Martin Dhragnet, keeping well within the SHADOW of the CANDLE -LIGHT, stealthily approached the couch, upon which the girl, Marjorie, -had thrown herself, but a short time before, to read for a fifth time, -the LETTERS OF HORACE WALPOLE as she had become much interested in THE -CASE OF DR. HORACE; but five times are too many to read, no matter whose -LETTERS they are and she was soon IN THE CLOUDS, and SLEEP overcame her. - -Dhragnet gave the figure a LIGHT touch, at the same time muttering, "MY -CAPTIVE, LITTLE NEMO IN SLUMBERLAND:" but THE LAW OF LIFE at once -asserted itself, for THE HUMAN TOUCH awakened the girl, but chloroform -soon silenced her, and throwing one of the ORIENTAL RUGS over the form, -and leaving his boots behind, and which fortunately for him, did not, -later, give a clue to the owner, THE INVADER carried his burden to THE -ONE WAY OUT, down THE CIRCULAR STAIRCASE, out INTO THE NIGHT, where THE -ACCOMPLICE, one of THE GANG, awaited him, and taking THE MIDDLE COURSE -across the YARD AND GARDEN, the TWO SINNERS passed out upon THE COUNTRY -ROAD, THE ROAD made famous by JOHN GILPIN, and none too soon, for THE -TENANTS OF THE TREES were BEGINNING to announce the approach of DAWN, the -end of THE LONG NIGHT, THE MORNING OF TO-DAY. - -Marjorie was indeed KIDNAPPED BY PIRATES, as the TESTIMONY OF WITNESSES, -had there been any, later on, would have proved. A short walk along THE -DRUID PATH brought THE GENTLEMAN with the KIDNAPPED girl and CHERRY, his -pal, to DEEP MOAT GRANGE, where a motor awaited them. - -"Now, PICCADILLY JIM, don't ask any FOOLISH QUESTIONS," said Dhragnet, -THE DAREDEVIL; "don't stand there as if you had been STRUCK BY LIGHTNING: -this is not A FOOL'S ERRAND: we've not COME OUT TO PLAY: GREAT SNAKES, I -LITTLE KNEW what a HANDICAP the girl was going to be, an' I never have -much SUCCESS WITH HENS, an' she must weigh a ton, I GUESS: but WHEN THE -HOUR CAME, and IN SPITE OF THE HANDICAP, I had to grab her ROYAL HIGHNESS -and skip; but THE DANGER MARK is passed, an' we'll soon have POLLY -PEACHUM, IN CHAINS, aboard our merry captain's leaky OLD CIDER MILL: -grind your engine, LADDIE, and get away from this DESERTED VILLAGE, for -this may be a ZEPPELIN NIGHT, an' you know only innocent people, like -ourselves, are killed on those nights, an' don't get twisted up in your -untied SHOESTRINGS, an' don't SOUND your horn." - -And THE MAN AT THE WHEEL soon had the motor ON SIXTH SPEED, rushing in -FULL SWING, along THE ROMANTIC ROAD. - - - - -VI: INTRODUCES THE HEROINE. - - -The Brighton EXPRESS, having arrived at WATERLOO, some FORTY MINUTES -LATE, the Duke and his newly-made DUCHESS at once proceeded to HIS WIFE, -Celeste's APARTMENT in THE HOUSE IN SPRING GARDENS, where dinner awaited -them. - -"SWEETHEART," said the Duke, "you look a DREAM in that COSTUME; to-day a -DUCHESS OF FEW CLOTHES, TO-MORROW, of many: do you know, I feel we are -like THE CHILDREN WHO RAN AWAY: I really don't deserve all this -HAPPINESS: WHEN A MAN MARRIES or the woman goes IN SEARCH OF A HUSBAND, -they naturally have GREAT EXPECTATIONS for a HAPPY LIFE, and I know we -are not going to be disappointed." - -"And I am going to be a SUCCESSFUL WIFE," said the Duchess. - -"But to RETURN to our talk about your parents: I must find this so-called -NURSE NORAH; I am convinced that you are not the DAUGHTER of Anderson -Crow." - -"Of course I'm not, JACK, but whose daughter am I? I am IN THE DARK; when -JUST A LITTLE GIRL, I was sent to school at STRATFORD-ON-AVON where on -SATURDAY MORNINGS, I was visited by a woman who called herself MY AUNT -JEANNETTE, and spoke of me as A DAUGHTER OF THE RICH; MY SCHOOL LIFE -taught me THE VALUE OF COURAGE, but played HAVOC with my disposition: the -HOUR OF CONFLICT had to come, of course: and then DIMBIE AND I ran away -to TOWN and I soon became one of THE PLAYERS O'LONDON, and you know the -REST." - -"I shall certainly see YARBOROUGH THE PREMIER: he is familiar with LONDON -of twenty...." - -"His Grace is wanted on the TELEPHONE," said the maid. - -"Yes: Jameson: NO: very well: GREAT CATHERINE: very well." - -"I must leave you for a while, my dear; SANDY wants to see me and -Inspector Morgan is coming to my chambers; Jameson says something -important: ALL ABOUT ME: JUST FANCY: so GOOD BYE SWEETHEART, you are -going to be A JOY FOREVER, and these are going to be GREAT DAYS for us; -LIFE IS A DREAM really." - -After leaving SPRING Gardens, the Duke, who did not consider WALKING A -FINE ART, proceeded slowly along KENSINGTON road, ON THE LOOKOUT for -FAMILIAR FACES, and at THE STREET CALLED STRAIGHT, was stopped by a sign -NO THOROUGHFARE, where a subway was under construction, and was accosted -by a bibulous INDIVIDUAL, who had just waded through a mortar box, and -who said: - -"Greash Scott: ole BOY" said THE MAN WITH THE IRON SHOES, swinging his -GOLD HEADED CANE, "who'd thought--hic--it'd snowed so hard in thish one -spot: Sir: wantchew t'know, I'm fren' of Sir Jaff'y Gotdough: an' he's -dead." - -The Duke had proceeded as far as Addison Road station, when a hansom -pulled up towards him, and he immediately recognized the occupant as his -cousin the Lady Evelyn, who said-- - -"Jack: I've been watching for you: Jameson said you were in SPRING -Gardens, but preferred not to give the number: said it was NORTH OF -FIFTY-THREE: jump in, please; I know it is not GOOD FORM FOR WOMEN to be -driving ALONE in a public vehicle, and I feel like one of THE GIRL ROUGH -RIDERS." - -"Well; MY LADY CAPRICE, I WAS THINKING OF YOU; what's on HER LADYSHIP'S -CONSCIENCE?" - -"Jack: I want this to be A CHRONICLE OF FRIENDSHIPS: I know you will ask -BY WHAT AUTHORITY, am I interesting myself in your affairs, but do let us -be COMRADES, let me tell you that the Major has been telling me about -your FRIEND, THE CHORUS LADY, THE IDOL OF THE TOWN, as she is called--now -keep your temper--please, only nice things to say--I AM convinced that -she is a lovely and remarkable girl, and not a mere FLUFFY RUFFLES: the -Major says she is not the daughter of THE ADVENTURER, Crow." - -"But, my dear EVELYN, you of all others; you are THE ONE WOMAN to -interest yourself: it is amazing." - -"No sarcasm, JACK, you know I care lots for you, FOR SUCH IS LIFE, and if -you really want to marry the girl, you may count on me: but I came to -tell you, that ONE DAY, some time ago, ON OUR STREET, my motor ran down a -WOMAN; of course you will say the INEVITABLE, WOMAN IN THE WAY, and -thinking her only stunned ordered her carried into the HOUSE, and called -THE DOCTOR, and after an examination, DR. DAVID ordered absolute quiet -and forbade her immediate removal: for three days, the woman raved about -THE MALEFACTOR, Celeste, Cammerleigh, Crow, and THE FRUIT OF THE TREE: -ordinarily, one does not give these ravings a second thought for -delirious persons seem to have A PERFECT PASSION for raving ON ANYTHING, -but the things next to their HEART, but the names struck me very -forcibly; is it not curious THE WAY THINGS HAPPEN; NIGHT AND MORNING, -from NINE UNTIL SIX-THIRTY, she kept it up: I think, at the time of the -accident, the WOMAN was being followed, as Denis has seen the same man -watching THE HOUSE: the woman finally recovered and upon being -interrogated, admitted that she expected to need a large sum of MONEY, -and asked if I would be willing to give two thousand pounds for her -SECRET: of course I agreed, with a string attached, meaning of course, -that being a woman, you have a perfect right to change YOUR MIND, -whereupon, she said that when I receive a box containing a red lily, I -must at once visit the PRINCESS Dehra: TO-MORROW, I shall tell you what I -have discovered at the PRINCESS Dehra's." - -"Truly, EVELYN, you're a wonder: I believe you are going to help this -LITTLE DUKE, as you helped LITTLE ROB ROBIN: the deed has been done, I -have paid THE PRICE OF LOVE: I was MARRIED at BRIGHTON this morning." - -"I am very glad, JACK; and I WISH YOU JOY: I KNOW she is a dear girl.... -By-the-bye, I am still undecided about becoming SIR JAFFRAY'S WIFE: I had -hoped to make something out of him, but...." - -"About how much: a million?" forgetting, for the moment, that he had just -heard of the death of this unfortunate individual. - -"Sarcastic again, Jack: but here we are at Brook street: driver: No. -SEVENTEEN Grosvenor square: Good-night, Jack; come to see me TO-MORROW, -and trust to my JUDGMENT." - - - - -VII: THE CRISIS. - - -"HELLO! Sandy, OLD MAN: how are you? is THE LURE OF THE CITY too much for -you? take that chair, please." - -"Thanks: I really would not know what to do with it." - -"Same old joker, I see: but tell me about THE MARRIAGE OF THEODORA: when -I heard of THE SUICIDE of her UNCLE WILLIAM.... By-the-bye, WHY DID HE DO -IT?" - -"Well: I suppose THE UNFORSEEN happened, and, I dare say, he feared BARON -TRIGAULT'S VENGEANCE and moreover, I fancy he could not have stood THE -TEST of the probable revelations of RAILWAY MISRULE: SO THEY WERE -MARRIED, not AT THE VILLA ROSE, but at THE HOUSE OF SERRAVALLE, you know -THE RED-HOUSE ON ROWAN STREET, on THE UP GRADE from WOODSTOCK, on THE -SUNNY SIDE OF THE HILL: THEODORA'S HUSBAND, MR. OPP, is, by LONG ODDS, -the nicest chap I have met in years: of course, it was a MARRIAGE A LA -MODE, as he has inherited the greater portion of JOHN MARSH'S MILLIONS, -and he has undertaken THE EDUCATION OF JACQUELINE, THE RED HEAD, you -know: rather AN EMBARRASSING ORPHAN, but a jolly keen one, just the same: -knows about THREE HUNDRED THINGS A BRIGHT GIRL CAN DO, and she will be A -SUCCESS IN LIFE: but of all the FAIRIES I HAVE MET...." - -"Inspector Morgan, your Grace," announces Jameson. - -"Sorry, Sandy, I'll see you later. Morgan, I've been AN EXILE FROM LONDON -for one whole day: what's the news?" - -"I thought your Grace would like to be in at THE ROUND-UP to-night, as I -believe you will have some personal interest in the case: I have not all -the ends joined: there are a few FRAGMENTS THAT REMAIN unattached, but it -is only a question of getting UNDER THE CRUST: but before I forget it; -the DOVER incident is closed: THE PASSENGER FROM CALAIS has been CAPTURED -and THE CAREER OF KATHERINE BUSH has been brought to a close: always hate -to run down THE WEAKER SEX, but QUICK ACTION was necessary. We are going -to Ratcliffe, your Grace, and I have The Yard's Rolls-Royce below, and if -you have no objection, we'll make a start. I have taken the PRECAUTION to -bring THE SCARLET RUNNER, as we call it; pretty heavy car, but greater -SECURITY; LIGHT MOTOR CARS AND VOITURETTES are no good for rough roads." - -"JERRY," said Morgan, as they reached the curb, "GO-AHEAD, don't be a -'FRAID CAT, High street, Ratcliffe." - -It took but a moment to get FROM LOW TO HIGH GEAR: through Hobart Place, -into VICTORIA Street, across New Palace Yard, and on to the Embankment. - -"Give this motor HALF A CHANCE," said Morgan, "and you are GOING SOME: -Does your Grace see the man AT THE CROSS ROADS? that's MY FRIEND -PROSPERO: he has been connected with more CELEBRATED CRIMES than any man -at the Yard." - -On HIGH SPEED, THE SCARLET CAR rushed past The Metropole, under Charing -Cross bridge, past The Needle and the imposing facade of SOMERSET HOUSE: -across Blackfriars entrance, and then into EARLY LONDON. "BREAKERS -AHEAD," called Morgan, "Jerry: careful of the mud." There really wasn't -any mud, only CITY DUST, but the sentence had to be interpolated here in -order to give a REASON for the next question. - -"I don't suppose your Grace is interested in ROAD MATERIALS? Last year, -MY SON AND I made A STUDY OF SPLASHES." - -The motor continued on its CROOKED WAY through Upper and Lower THAMES -streets, past THE TOWER OF LONDON, over THE BROKEN ROAD of Lower -Shadwell. - -"Your Grace, I venture to say, A BIT OF ROUGH ROAD." - -"Very, Morgan, but good for OUR DIGESTION, but THESE SHIFTING SCENES are -rather disconcerting." - -The motor was stopped at Love Lane, where the party was met by POLICEMAN -BLUE JAY, who accompanied them to the THAMES Wharf, BEYOND the No. 3 -shaft of Rotherhithe Tunnel. - -"Inspector," said THE PILOT, "here's A STROKE OF LUCK; this is no WILD -GOOSE CHASE; your trip is not IN VAIN; you're JUST IN TIME, for the boat -is still at ANCHOR." - -"WHAT SHALL WE DO NOW?" asked the Duke, not KNOWING, OTHER PEOPLE'S -BUSINESS. - -And Morgan, pointing through THE PURPLE MISTS, to the SURREY side, for -the early DAWN was upon them, said: - -"We have now reached THE END OF THE JOURNEY: do you see the ship in -MIDSTREAM off the Surrey Locks, in front of the gas tanks? That's our -destination: the DEAR ENEMY." - -"But, Morgan, for THE LIFE OF ME, I fail to see where I come in." - -"All in good time, your Grace: IT'S ALL IN A DAY'S WORK: again I say, -don't WORRY: but I see the EBB-TIDE is on," and blowing two blasts upon a -whistle, the Police-Boat, THE SEAWOLF, shot through THE OUTLET from -Shadwell Basin, where she was always HELD FOR ORDERS. - -"Be careful, your Grace: get away, ANTONIO: THE BLACK BARQUE, you know: -and when we get aboard, all be careful of the OPEN HATCHWAYS." - -And IN ANOTHER MOMENT, Morgan, standing in the bow, shouted "Ship Ahoy: -IN THE KING'S NAME, I want the captain of THE QUEEN OF THE NIGHT," after -which they began climbing UP THE LADDER. - -(A fight occurs here, a description of which has been omitted as it -contains some BLANKETY BLANK VERSE.) - -"And now, my worthy CAP'N GID, cut out the SMILES: THE GAME is up: the -POPULATION of your HAPPY SHIP has dropped one; we have secured two -prisoners and if you don't want to be the third, COME down, and besides, -BY WHAT AUTHORITY are you SAILING, UNDER TWO FLAGS: IN SPITE OF ALL the -WHITE LIES you have told us, you have A YOUNG LADY aboard and we propose -to have THE GIRL: WORDS TO THE WISE, you know. I admit that you have been -A VICTIM OF VILLAINY, but you are playing A DESPERATE GAME, and THE -RECKONING is at hand. Where is THE HIDDEN VICTIM? what, may I ask, have -you over there IN GRANDMA'S CHEST, there in THE SHADOW, UNDER THE RED -ROBE? Put down that gun: anyway I can see it is not THE REAL THING." - -(A fight occurs here, a description of which has been omitted, as there -was some PISTOL AND REVOLVER SHOOTING.) - -"My CAPTAIN with the FAIRY TALES, THE CONFLICT is over; THE DAY'S WORK is -finished; as a FIGHTER, you're a monumental failure: go buy a scrap-book, -and learn how to become a prize-fighter, and as to SHOOTING FIRE-ARMS -like WILD FIRE, it was simply FURTHER FOOLISHNESS; but FOR THE LOVE OF -TONITA, come off your PIRATE BRIDGE; pull up, and remember IT IS NEVER -TOO LATE TO MEND: no more MONKEY SHINES: this HAPPY-GO-LUCKY business has -been EASY MONEY to you, you with THE ITCHING PALM; but it is really not -one of the THINGS WORTH DOING, and IT NEVER CAN HAPPEN AGAIN: I PROMISE -to let you off, and these are no IDLE WORDS, for you have been THE DUPE, -and I WISH YOU JOY in your FREEDOM, but OH! MARY BE CAREFUL, hereafter. -And NOW, my MAN, draw up at the ROYAL ALBERT Dock." - - * * * * * - -"EXCUSE ME, MY LORD DUKE," said Morgan, "I think instead of awaiting the -return of the motor, THE MORE EXCELLENT WAY will be to begin THE HOMEWARD -JOURNEY, by taking a tram here for West Ham, and then the District to THE -WEST END, THE LAND OF MAKE BELIEVE." - -"GO-AHEAD BOYS: FOLLOW ME, your Grace," and carrying the still LIMPY -figure of the RELEASED girl, the party crossed the road. - - - - -VIII: THE GRAND FINALE. - - -The Duke of Belleville had just finished going through his morning's -post, and still held in his HAND a lengthy letter from his financial -adviser, RICHARD ELLIOTT, FINANCIER, THE MONEY MASTER dealing with THE -FINANCES OF SIR JOHN KYNNERSLY, one of THE BOOMERS of the day, and with -THE CONTEST FOR SOUND MONEY. The Duke was, at the moment, reclining -rather lazily, with his TWO LEGS outstretched, and was thinking, neither -of the contents of THE LETTERS, nor of WHAT TO WEAR, but listening -rather, as THE MUSIC LOVER, to THE SONG OF SONGS, THE SONG OF THE -CARDINAL, perched upon THE ELM TREE ON THE MALL. - -Oh! What is there to equal a SPRING IN LONDON? - -This, the Duke's favorite room, was at once the admiration of the -artistic, containing, as it did, wonderful examples of THE CHIPPENDALES, -and FRAGMENTS OF OLD FURNITURE, collected by HIS OWN PEOPLE, his very own -ANCESTORS: the room, too, was an historic one; many A PRINCESS OF -INTRIGUE had occupied that very chair, and the GHOSTS OF PICCADILLY had -met there on more than one occasion, for every house must have a GHOST, -even if it be JUST FOR FUN. - -THE BRONZE BELL of distant Big Ben had just proclaimed the hour of noon, -when Inspector Morgan was announced. - -"AT LAST," said the Duke to himself, "THE REVELATIONS OF INSPECTOR -MORGAN." - -"THE TOP OF THE MORNING to your Grace: I am here, as you see, AT THE TIME -APPOINTED: I trust your Grace is well, after the ORDEAL BY FIRE last -night? I am A COURIER OF FORTUNE. RECORD NO. 33 is now complete." - -"I AM WELL, Morgan: but out with THE GREAT SECRET: I take it that THE -WELDING of the chain is complete: that THE GREAT PLAN has been -successful: but allow me to suggest that you are not FRANKS DUELLIST, so -for goodness sake, stop bending THE SILVER BLADE of that knife: it is not -a rapier, as you seem to imagine, and I am afraid you will break it: it -really belongs IN THE KITCHEN." - -"MY STORY, your Grace, is rather long, and in a manner proves that there -has been MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING: but before I begin, let me say that Sir -Jaffray was FOUND DEAD this MORNING: of course it was DRINK that killed -him: I fancy that lets your cousin, HER LADYSHIP, out of a bad bargain: -THE MESSAGE, BY TELEPHONE from Broadstairs stated further that Sir -Jaffray and THREE COMRADES were BOXING and drinking quantities of BAD -WHISKEY at BAR-20 of THE FLYING INN, and à propos were discussing the -ART OF AVIATION, and FLIGHT WITHOUT FORMULAE, which only added FUEL to -THE FLAME, and became so noisy, that THE MASTER OF THE INN threw them -OUTDOORS: but to RETURN; this MORNING, I had a long INTERVIEW with Miss -Marjorie Crow, and she has helped me to BRIDGE, THE CHASM: LINK BY LINK, -have I welded the chain: your Grace will probably recall that affair at -ELIZABETH, when Lord Cammerleigh, having been at THE OPERA with Lady -Grasmere, was found dead, two hours later, in High street, ELIZABETH; his -apparently lifeless body carried into THE RUNNING HORSE INN, to await the -arrival of the Coroner of THE 13th DISTRICT: how the body disappeared IN -A MYSTERIOUS WAY, after having been viewed by THE VEILED LADY: the NEXT -MORNING, one of the Yard's men, PENDENNIS, in passing along QUALITY -STREET, saw Lord Cammerleigh at THE WINDOW AT THE WHITE CAT: with the aid -of a FORCING BOOK, THE BOLTED DOOR was forced open and his Lordship, even -although AT BAY, denied having been at ELIZABETH: said he had been -MOTORING through the HIGHWAYS AND BYWAYS IN KENT. Nevertheless, he quite -innocently gave us THE CLUE: ONCE BITTEN TWICE SHY, you know; THE WOMAN -IN QUESTION was traced to CHIPPINGE BOROUGH, where we found she made A -CHANGE OF DRESS, and in the garb of a CHARITY sister, visited prisoner -NUMBER 99, at DARTMOOR: here, then, was THE MAN IN THE CASE, No. 99, -being none other than the celebrated DR. NIKOLA. FROM THE BOTTOM UP, by -DEVIOUS WAYS, by PERSUASION, and I might say, almost by FOUL-PLAY, have -we worked out this case: the WOMAN, I have no doubt, finally realized -that she was being HUNTED DOWN, for we took every OPPORTUNITY to let her -know that we had her under surveillance, but here our theory failed us, -THAT IS TO SAY, the woman, NO DOUBT realizing that she was UNDER FIRE, -instead of coming to US with a proposition, wrote a confession, then took -A FATAL DOSE of Coniine. Now, your Grace, I understand that you were -married yesterday, and you will recall that last night we rescued a young -girl, named MARJORIE Crow...." - -"What! Morgan, you certainly don't mean SISTERS: but I know the Duchess -hasn't a sister." - -"AS YOU LIKE IT, your Grace: right you are, her Grace is quite unaware of -the fact; but THE TURN OF THE BALANCE came this morning, when I informed -his Lordship about THE WOMAN AT KENSINGTON, HOW SHE PLAYED THE GAME: that -her husband was still alive and IN DURANCE VILE, although, as I SAID TO -MYSELF, this is not THE TRUTH as his RELEASE came last night. Lord -Cammerleigh then related his story: strange how all the FRAGMENTS should -be found at the same time: IN A NUTSHELL, the woman's CONFESSION is that -she and her sister were the nurses to his Lordship's two daughters...." - -"It will be news to most people to hear of Cammerleigh as a FATHER," said -the Duke, "but continue." - -"At this time his Lordship was very fond of the gaming-table and -thoroughly knew THE RULES OF THE GAME: one night, finding himself -cheated, knocked down the offender, AS A MATTER OF COURSE, and fled from -THE CLUB. AS IT HAPPENED, the man was not injured: continued his -prison-in-the-end career, and came into public notice TWO YEARS AGO, in -the case of THE FOURBE Soapstone and Leather Co. vs. THE GREAT AMERICAN -PIE COMPANY: was convicted and is now at DARTMOOR as No. 99, which is, as -I told you, NOT EXACTLY SO. The morning after the club affair, the WOMAN, -the nurse, informed Lord Cammerleigh that he had killed HER HUSBAND and -demanded twenty thousand pounds; to keep silent: for the moment, she knew -she had THE UPPER HAND: his Lordship thought HIS HOUR had come, but he -put up A GOOD FIGHT: but YOU NEVER KNOW YOUR LUCK, for the nurse did not -know that his Lordship only had a very small life-interest in his wife's -estate, and could not comply with her demands, her scheme had failed: -then she spirited away the infants, and it was not until to-day, that his -Lordship knew that they were still alive, so thoroughly did THE -BLACKMAILERS do their work." - -"Why did he not call in the police: COWARD...." - -"JUST A MINUTE, your Grace, the reason is obvious: he had the murder, -so-called, in mind, and he also hoped to locate the kids himself: for -eighteen years, he was HELD IN THE TOILS, until one day he saw the woman, -driving in a VICTORIA, in THE ENGADINE: she seemed to be moving IN HIGH -PLACES (ALTITUDE, 5935 ft.): he followed her and made A BID FOR FREEDOM, -but without SUCCESS: the WOMAN informed HIS LORDSHIP that the moment she -heard of his DEATH, she would reveal HER SECRET to his lawyers: hence the -two sham deaths: on both occasions, he had some one AT HAND, to -immediately come FORWARD to claim the body and spirit it away, so that -proper restoratives could at once be applied, without the aid of an -inquisitive medical MAN: Doctor Phaque thinks he must have used a powder, -composed chiefly of Dimethyloxyquinizine and Myosin to produce this -STATE: the same person was to at once inform the NEWSPAPERS of the death: -unfortunately, on the first occasion and ON THE EVE of SUCCESS, the -woman, having followed him to ELIZABETH, at once saw through the trick. -The second attempt proved equally disastrous: we had the details of the -Norton abduction, by arresting the man left behind, A WATCHER IN THE -WOODS; the woman had arranged THE GREAT PLAN, HERSELF, when she realized -that she had divulged entirely too much to Miss MARJORIE Crow but MAN -PROPOSES, you know: the Nikola man's real name is Anderson Nicholson -Crow. How is that for A STORY OF A LIE? Lord Cammerleigh is now with his -DAUGHTER, MARJORIE, and expects to call upon her Grace very shortly: he -really believes himself quite ill; I found him studying A TREATISE ON -APPENDICITIS, and he TALKS about being put UNDER THE KNIFE: A DIAGNOSIS -of his own, AS I REMEMBER; PEOPLE LIKE THAT are NOT EXACTLY RIGHT; they -get on my nerves; they should have PEACE AND QUIET behind THE FIVE BARRED -GATE." - -"Oh! COME, Morgan, take THINGS AS THEY ARE: But your success has been -truly marvellous: HERE'S TO YOU: you deserve a big COMPENSATION, and A -TOY SHOP, FOR THE CHILDREN. Jameson, telephone THE SLEEPING CAR office -in Cockspur Street, to reserve rooms on THE ROME EXPRESS for to-morrow -night, as the Duchess and I want to get away from the TUMULT of THE -CROWDED STREET; and TO BE AMUSED: and now, Morgan, LAUGH AGAIN, and -GOOD-BYE." - - * * * * * - -OF COURSE EVERYTHING HAS BEEN EXPLAINED, BUT NOBODY WILL UNDERSTAND THE -EXPLANATIONS ANY BETTER THAN THE AUTHOR UNDERSTOOD WHAT WAS SOUGHT TO BE -EXPLAINED. - - - - -Transcribers note: - - -Minor printing errors have been corrected without note, although -inconsistent punctuation and capitalisation has been left as per the -original. - -The following is a list of notable changes made. The modified line is -shown first and the original line is shown second: - - to amuse himself by dictating to MISS MARJORIBANKS, - to amuse himself by dictating to MISS MAJORIBANKS, - - to take his PETS to NORTHANGER ABBEY, to SERENADE - to take his PETS to NORTHRANGER ABBEY, to SERENADE - - stealthily approached the couch, upon which the girl, Marjorie, - steathily approached the couch, upon which the girl, Marjorie, - - shaft of Rotherhithe Tunnel - shaft of Rotherhite Tunnel - -The line "BOOK, THE BOLTED DOOR was forced open and his Lordship," -was left as per the original although it should probably have started -with HOOK. - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Peachmonk, by John Eyerman - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PEACHMONK *** - -***** This file should be named 40253-8.txt or 40253-8.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/4/0/2/5/40253/ - -Produced by Robert Cicconetti, Dave Hobart and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions -will be renamed. - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no -one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation -(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without -permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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