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diff --git a/40199-0.txt b/40199-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..3f47768 --- /dev/null +++ b/40199-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,5164 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 40199 *** + + MABEL. + + A Novel, + + BY EMMA WARBURTON. + + _IN THREE VOLUMES._ + + VOL. II. + + + LONDON: + THOMAS CAUTLEY NEWBY, PUBLISHER, + 30, WELBECK STREET, CAVENDISH SQUARE. + 1854. + + + + +MABEL. + + + + +CHAPTER I. + + Oh, give me comfort, if you can! + Oh, tell me where to fly! + Oh, tell me if there can be hope, + For one so lost as I! + + SOUTHEY. + + +The grey dawn was slowly and faintly breaking, with the calm, dull light +of a winter's morning. The stormy wind had sunk to rest, the fire, no +longer fanned by its heavy gusts, had nearly abated, and what more was +required to extinguish it, was afforded by the arrival of the fire +engine, which had been forwarded with the usual promptitude, though from +the distance it had to travel, it arrived too late to be of any +effectual service. + +Mrs. Lesly's house had been the last to take fire, and was not so +completely destroyed, as the smaller cottages in the more thickly +populated parts of the village. Mr. Ware was rejoiced to see that the +church remained uninjured--his own house, too, had escaped, and no fears +were entertained for the Manor. Yet, in many parts, the fire still +smouldered, though its fury was spent, and gave a light to the +landscape, which rivalled that of the wintry dawn. + +There was a small and pleasant nook by the road side, where on summer +evenings, children would assemble to play. Here a group had collected, +composed of men and women, surrounding the prostrate form of the unhappy +bailiff. Mr. Ware was supporting his head, with that pity for the +wretched and suffering which his sacred character made as necessary as +his natural feelings rendered it pleasant. Satisfied, as he believed, of +the safety of Mrs. Lesly and her children, he had not been tempted from +the side of the man, whose remorse called for all that attention which +he only could give, and who, if he moved, piteously entreated him not +to leave him. Well indeed might he beg him to remain, for in the various +groups which surrounded him, he could not discover a single friend. +Subject to his tyranny during his day of power, each among them might +have stood forward to convict him of some harsh unkindness, if not of +actual cruelty and oppression. Amongst others was Martin, his shaggy +eyebrows bent in triumph on the man who, unable to display his usual +bearing of conscious authority, lay weak and powerless before him. + +The stranger was seen advancing slowly across the green, with his hat +slouched over his face, and his arms crossed upon his chest. All +slightly moved to make room for him, and allowed him to stand without +being too closely pressed--but, whether from a sense of his personal +bravery in their service, or from an unconscious respect to his +commanding manner--few stopped to enquire. On his pale countenance were +marks of agitation--he looked indeed almost faint--and Mr. Ware, +fearing he might have sustained some injury in his many daring exploits, +offered him some of the brandy, which he had been giving to the most +weary. He eagerly accepted the offer, and then, seeing that the group +had become silent since he joined it, he turned to Mr. Ware. + +"As a minister of holy peace, sir," he said, "let me suggest to you, +that some means be taken to find out by whom this foul deed has been +committed, for the intention may well meet with as much condemnation as +if it had succeeded." + +"A foul deed most assuredly," said Mr. Ware, rising from his stooping +posture--"a foul deed most truly has been attempted this night, and it +ought indeed to humble us," he added, as a tear glistened in his eye, +"to think that there is one among us, brethren, capable of doing so +terrible a thing as to endeavour to put a man to death, even though he +were his worst enemy, much less to conceive so horrible a means, even +while ruin was on our own hearth sides, and the hand of Providence +raised to punish. Oh, I am grieved beyond words to tell, not so much +that ye are poor, but that poverty has brought sin among you, as I know +it has done. Have you not had warning enough to-night?" + +A groan escaped from the stranger, and all turned round, but his eyes +were fixed on the ground. + +"Now, my children," continued Mr. Ware, "let us cast off from ourselves +this great sin, and tell all we know of it; and if he who has done it be +amongst us, let him stand forward and suffer his punishment, as the only +expiation he can offer." + +"Not so," said the bailiff, raising himself with difficulty, and +supporting himself on his arm, while he glanced timidly upon those who +were about him; but carefully avoiding the stranger, whose dark eyes, +from beneath his slouched hat, were bent upon him. + +"And why," asked the latter, eagerly, "would you arrest the hand of +justice?" + +"Sir," said the bailiff, solemnly, "let the punishment rest upon him +that deserves it. I am he. If it be wrong to think to take away my +life--if it be sin to compass the death of any man--it is also sin to +tempt a man to do it. Many have been the galling words I have spoken, +and the wicked, taunting things I have done. But, oh, my fellow men, +forgive me now, as you hope to be forgiven. This terrible night has +brought my sins to remembrance, and, if I live I am a changed man--but +if I die--" + +Here a tremor seized his whole frame. + +"Then you will not tell us?" said the stranger, enquiringly. + +"No, sir," said Rogers, meeting his eye for the first time. "You have +saved my life--but even for that I cannot do as you say; and before the +light of the sky above us, I swear that his name shall never pass my +lips." + +"I did not know there was as much good as that in him," muttered Martin. + +"I cannot help approving such sentiments," said the stranger; "for they +shew a forgiving spirit, under hard circumstances, and it may be the +beginning of better things which is strongly called for--since it is +unlikely, that your master would overlook your neglect of the trust he +so implicitly confided in you. (Rogers groaned.) Nothing can defend you, +but a hearty and sincere repentance; but I do say," said the soldier, as +his eye kindled, "that it is a good beginning; and, sir, I, for one, am +willing to withdraw any further investigation of this mysterious affair, +since he who has suffered most, will not come forward with his +evidence." + +"The crime lies heavily on my heart," replied Mr. Ware; "but I am little +inclined to enter on such a business, though I know it is only right +that the criminal should be punished. If, however, he would come forward +and plead guilty to this outrage, it would remove the suspicion which +now rests on us all." + +"No, no, sir," cried the bailiff; "let him keep his own counsel, for by +confessing, he makes you all partners in his crime, if you do not +punish him. Let it be between him and me, and let him take my life, if I +ever deserve again to lose it at his hands." + +"It may be possible," said the stranger; "that your master will accept +your repentance, the first fruits of which we all witness. Is there any +amongst us," said he, looking round, "who is so unforgiving, as to think +Colonel Hargrave wrong, should he give this poor man, an opportunity of +redeeming his moral character in the situation in which he has lost it. +I, for one, should it be necessary, would say that he was right." + +A murmur of approval ran round the group, though many, at the same time +doubted if they would be consulted on the subject. + +A light of renewed strength, and hope, shot over the bailiff's dejected +face; but when he tried to speak, the revulsion of feeling was too much +for him, and he burst into tears. + +"Take him home," said the stranger, and as several men hastened to +execute his order, he turned away, and walked slowly down the village. +As he did so, he was attracted by the observations of several women who +were standing talking together. + +"Poor young thing," said one; "so soon cut off. Well, the rich +oftentimes go before the poor. 'Tis a sad night, indeed," said another; +"I thought she would not bear it." + +This was said with that tone of real sympathy in illness or death, which +the poor feel so readily and sincerely. + +"What has happened?" he enquired, stopping and addressing the last +speaker. + +"Well may you ask," replied she; "for it is a sweet flower that has been +cut down to-night. I was just coming down from the Manor house, where I +went to see the children, and as I came back through the avenue, what +should I see, but a light in old Molly's cottage. Now I knew she had +been up at the Manor time enough for her fire to have gone out; and, +says I, to myself, I'll just step in and see--so, up to the house I +went, and what should I see sitting on the door steps, but an old man a +crying like any thing. 'What's the matter?' says I; he didn't look up, +but he said, sobbing like: + +"'It's all over.' + +"'What's over?' says I. + +"'She's gone to rest,' says he. + +"'Who d'ye mean?' says I. + +"'Miss Amy,' says he, and then--but, bless my heart!" + +The stranger had sprung from them, and hurried forwards. + +"I believe he's a spirit," said the terrified speaker. + +"Nau, Nau," said an old woman, "he's flesh and blood, for I touched +'en." + +They had not much time, however, for further remark, for they were +summoned by their husbands to leave gossipping, and come and assist them +in doing all they could towards their comfort. Already Mrs. Hawkins, +housekeeper at the manor, had been busy in allotting to them the rooms +over the stables, formerly occupied by the grooms and stable boys, and +which were still neat and clean, and well aired, in the constant +expectation of the Colonel's return, for the faithful servant was +resolved, that, whenever her freakish master appeared, he should find +her prepared for him. The accommodation thus afforded, was, however +small, compared to the number of families, and, after dividing the whole +of the servants' offices between them, she was obliged to quarter many +in the better parts of the house; she was, therefore, not a little +relieved, when she found that most of the farm houses in the +neighbourhood had followed the good example set them, and freely opened +their doors to the houseless. + +The stranger might shortly afterwards be seen coming from the lodge, and +hastening towards Mr. Ware, who was superintending the removal of Rogers +to the rectory, where he hoped that during the hours of returning +health, he might acquire an influence, which might turn his present +feelings to good account. + +"Sir," said he, as he joined him, "may I beg you to go to poor Miss +Lesly." + +"What has happened to her?" said Mr. Ware, anxiously. + +"The child is dead," replied the stranger. + +"Dead!" exclaimed Mr. Ware, in surprise, "I heard she was safe, poor +child. How I wish I had seen her." + +He did not speak again till they reached the lodge, and then leaving his +companion without, he entered the chamber of death. There lay his little +favorite on her couch, which had been arranged with studious care. By +her side knelt Mabel, her head buried in her hands, her hair loose and +disordered, and looking almost as lifeless as the child she mourned. + +Miss Ware was in the room, and hurried to meet her brother with an +affectionate kiss, for she had not seen him for some hours. + +"I am glad you are come, Edmund," said she, "for I can do nothing for +the poor girl--she will not even speak to me." + +"Do not even try to comfort her," said her brother, taking her hand, +kindly; "we who are grateful for each other's safety can well enter into +her feelings. Send away these good friends, and keep only one with you, +and then stay with her a little while; but do not rouse her yet--I will +come again and see her." + +His sister, always prompt in following his advice, choosing one steady +woman to be with her, dismissed the rest (who had crowded in with the +hope of being of service) with thanks for their attention. + +Mr. Ware then joined the stranger, and walked on towards the rectory; he +said:-- + +"I can do nothing for her yet--but my sister is with her. It is too soon +to offer comfort--for it seems like mockery in the first moments of +anguish. You seem to take an interest in our favorite." + +"It is impossible to be insensible to such heartrending scenes," he +returned, laconically, as if to check further remark. + +"We are much indebted, sir, for your exertions last night," said Mr. +Ware, at length. + +"Pray mention nothing of that," he said, evasively. + +"But how can I help it--is it in the nature of man to receive favors +with a thankless heart?" + +"It is." + +"Yes, but not, I trust, so soon after they have been conferred. I own +that benefits are often, much too often forgotten--but you wrong us, if +you believe we could so return a favor bestowed by a stranger. You shall +receive my thanks, at least; and do not think my simple-hearted friends +less accustomed to feel because they often express their feelings with +difficulty. No, let me assure you, that as long as the tale of this +night shall be told by the cottage hearth, so long will your name be +spoken of with praise." + +"Sir," he replied, "I have been soured by the world, or I should not +have expressed a doubt, which, believe me, I am very far from feeling. I +know, as you say, that my poor services will be handed down as part of +this night's sad tale; and of yourself, sir," he slightly raised his +hat, "I have seen enough to convince me, that you deserve my respect, +even had I not seen it reflected from those whose hearts are difficult +to win; and let me assure you, that I am more gratified than you would +easily believe, for the good opinion you so kindly express, though I +feel myself utterly unworthy of it. It were hard for me to doubt the +existence of gratitude, when the smallest benefits, and even the kindly +words of-- + + 'Auld lang syne' + +are treasured up in my mind. No; past benefits are like stars which we +leave behind in our onward path, but which may light it still. But," +added he, relaxing into his desponding tone, "how very few have we to +remember--how scantily are those kindnesses shewn which keep the heart +warm towards its fellow creatures." + +"Pardon me," replied Mr. Ware, "carry back your thoughts perhaps to a +mother's tender care, and her love which can find an excuse for every +fault--the more thoughtful pride of a father, and the thousand little +kindnesses and confidences by which sisters and brothers bind themselves +to each other by links which the world finds it difficult to break. + +"Remember our school days and school-fellows, friends at college, and +why not friends in after life. Oh, the heart must be bereaved indeed +that has nothing to excite its gratitude--and, excuse me, the heart is +kept warm towards the world more by its power of blessing others, than +of being blessed itself--and that is in the power of all, even if it be +but the gift of a kindly word and a sympathizing look. I am surprised +that one so skilled in giving assistance to others should speak as you +do; but it seems, if I may venture to say so, as if the world had dealt +hardly with you." + +"And you," said the stranger, "speak as one who has been so fortunate as +both to have given and received blessings." + +"You speak truly, at least so far, that I have been much blessed through +a life which I may call a long one--let me hope that you may be equally +so." + +"What I may be," he replied, moodily, "none can say--but what the past +has been, I know too well. Yet why I intrude my confidence upon you, I +can scarcely tell, except that your kindness encourages it. Yet, when I +am far from here, I shall remember your courtesy with pleasure, and +would plead that I may not be altogether forgotten." + +"You need not ask me that," said Mr. Ware; "but you are not going +to-day, and must come and dine with me." + +"I must deny myself that pleasure," he returned; "for I have sent my +horse to the little inn at Fowly, and ordered my dinner--and besides, +you will have another guest." + +"Then I must wish you good day for the present," said Mr. Ware, as they +parted, he to see after the comforts of the sick bailiff, while the +stranger crossed the fields to the Aston woods, and buried himself in +its wild paths for the rest of the day. + + + + +CHAPTER II. + + Life is before ye--from the fated road + Ye cannot turn; then take ye up your load, + Not yours to tread, or leave the unknown way, + Ye must go o'er it, meet ye what ye may; + Gird up your souls within ye to the deed, + Angels and fellow spirits bid ye speed, + What tho' the brightness dim, the pleasure fade, + The glory wane--oh! not of these is made + The awful life that to your trust is given. + + F. BUTLER. + + +Towards evening Mr. Ware repaired to the lodge. When he entered the +small room he found his sister sitting near the window, while Mabel was +still upon her knees by the bed-side. + +"I cannot rouse her in the least," said Miss Ware, anxiously, as she met +his eye, "this is a wretched place for her to stay in, and it will only +do her harm." + +Mr. Ware approached her, and repeating her name gently, waited for an +answer, but receiving none, he laid his hand on her shoulder, and said, +with attempted firmness-- + +"My child, your mother asks for you." + +A heaving of the chest and a deep drawn sigh shewed that he was heard. + +"Shall she ask in vain," he continued, "will you refuse to go to her, +dear Mabel--will you not go and weep with her?" + +Mabel raised her head, but her first effort caused her eyes to fall upon +the bed, and she burst into a passionate flood of tears. + +The brother and sister, both deeply moved, looked at each other in +silence. + +Again Mabel raised her head, and seemingly relieved, stretched her hand +towards Mr. Ware, who took it, and kindly pressed it in both his own. + +"Bear with me a little while," she murmured, with quivering lips, "and I +will go with you--yes, I am ready now," she said, slowly rising, then +stopping to look round upon the desolate chamber, she exclaimed-- + +"But how can I leave her here?" + +"Leave her to my care," said Miss Ware, "and she shall be properly +removed to the Manor." + +Mabel seized her hand, but then, as if afraid of trusting herself, she +tore herself away, and hurried out. Once in the open air she accepted +Mr. Ware's proffered arm, and allowed him to guide her where he pleased. +She neither spoke nor looked around her, nor did he seek to excite her +to any further effort, he was contented in the idea that he was taking +her where she would not long remain inert; so he only drew the cloak, he +had thrown round her, closer over her head, to shield her from the cold +air, and led her quietly to the Manor. + +It no longer wore the air of solemn silence, which was its wont; the +sound of many confused voices woke the echoes in the court-yard, and +men and women lounged freely about the usually strictly kept premises. + +The hall door was opened as they approached, by Mrs. Hawkins, who had +seen them from one of the windows--the good woman looked considerably +hurried from superintending the different parts of the well-filled +mansion, and in doing her utmost to preserve the carpets, hangings, and +statues from the touch of the children, and the over curious. + +Mabel paused as she entered the hall, and looked anxiously round her. +This was the only show part of the house, but it amply repaid the visit +of the stranger. Around the walls statues of great beauty and immense +value were placed in niches--above was a gallery in which paintings of +the choicest kind were arranged with much taste. This reached by two +marble staircases at each end. The hall was of the height of the house +itself, and was thoroughly lighted by windows, and a sky light, so that +the pictures were seen to the greatest advantage. Beneath it opened on +passages leading to different sitting-rooms, while the picture-gallery +above led to the bedrooms. All these being fitted up in a style which +included every luxury which the most lavish wealth could purchase, yet +so completely in keeping that the whole appeared a thoroughly +comfortable English home, after all. + +For a few moments Mabel remained looking round her in bewildered +silence. Mr. Ware watched her attentively, but her open countenance did +not, as usual, tell him the train of thought which oppressed her. He +took her hand, saying kindly-- + +"Mrs. Hawkins is waiting to take you to your mother." + +"I am ready," said Mabel, drawing a long breath, as she turned and +followed her to the room which had been given to Mrs. Lesly, and where +already every comfort, which the good housekeeper could devise, +surrounded her. + +Satisfied now that the mother and daughter were together, Mr. Ware left +the mansion with many sad reflections. + +The next day was Sunday, and strangely came that time of rest after the +two last days of confusion and terror. The morning was cold, clear, and +frosty, and as glad a sun as ever cheers a wintry landscape, shone down +upon the smouldering ruins of the village. As the time for morning +service approached, a merry peal from the bells of the village church +welcomed sunshine to the earth, and peace and safety to the hearts of +men. + +As Mr. Ware slowly ascended the steep path leading to the church, he was +followed by many groups of old and young, who, at his bidding, hastened +to testify their thankfulness for the sparing of their lives. One young +life had alone been cut down, and none passed Mrs. Lesly's cottage, +without thinking sadly of Amy. When the whole of the little congregation +had assembled, crowding the church, for all were there, the stranger +entered with a sad and serious countenance. Avoiding the seat belonging +to the Manor, which the clerk readily opened for him, he entered the +next pew, and kneeling gently, seemed anxious to avoid the many eyes +which were turned admiringly upon him, who, for their sakes, had braved +every danger with reckless confidence. The sermon was rendered +impressive by its touching simplicity, and found an echo in every heart +subdued by the late calamity. None listened more attentively than did +their stranger benefactor; and when the service was concluded, he seemed +still impressed with what he had heard, as, avoiding all companionship +he walked again to the woods, which, by their peculiar beauty, always +attracted the attention of the tourist. But when the bell again called +to service, he returned, and entered the church, late, as before; +possibly to avoid the many groups which had been loitering round it; +and, when they again left the church, he lingered till he could join Mr. +Ware in the porch, walking quietly out with him through his private +gate; thus, avoiding those who were anxious to offer him their thanks. + +"You understand, sir," he said, "how to touch the feelings." + +"It is of little consequence, I fear, to excite the feelings," replied +Mr. Ware; "for so many are contented to go no further." + +"I believe you; yet our feelings are often the gateways to our reason." + +"Yes, indeed; and therefore the power of appealing to them is not to be +slighted. I was myself deeply impressed, to-day, when I saw the many +anxious faces looking up to me as I spoke. Oh, I do believe this might +be the beginning of better things in my parish, if--." + +"If what," enquired the stranger; "are you, too, going to throw all the +blame on the poor landlord." + +"Willingly, most willingly would I throw not the blame, but all the +praise of their well-being upon him, if he would but return and give us +the blessing of feeling him to be amongst us." + +"Yet you cannot help being angry with him." + +"Perhaps not, but mine is more the pettishness of jealous affection, and +I cannot bear to see him keeping away from those whose hearts he might +make all his own--and wasting health, and time, and happiness, in the +wayward course he has chosen. + +"But, sir," added Mr. Ware, checking himself. "You will come to my +house, to-day." + +"I thank you, time presses with me; and here you see my horse is +waiting. A fine fellow, is he not; how gallantly he bore that long ride +the other night, and he looks none the worse for it now. Here, my good +fellow," he said, dismissing the man who led him, and taking the rein +upon his arm. "Will you not walk a little further with me," he continued +to Mr. Ware. + +"Certainly, though I confess myself thoroughly disappointed that you +will not stay with me." + +"Another time, dear sir, I will not fail to avail myself of the pleasure +of your acquaintance; but I really have engagements I do not like to +break. Do you think there is any hope of the poor bailiff?" + +"I trust so." + +"I know you will do every thing you can for him, mentally and bodily. If +he would become a changed man, the comfort of your people might be +better secured, than by the appointment of a fresh bailiff." + +"Very possibly," replied Mr. Ware. + +The deep shadows of the winter's evening were now rapidly closing round +them, and the light streaks on the horizon growing fainter and +fainter--yet, still they lingered as if their short acquaintance +rendered them reluctant to part so soon. + +"The night warns me that I must go," said the stranger, at length, as he +mounted his horse, casting as he did so, a glance at the surrounding +country; "though I would willingly stay--but the shadows always come +between me and happiness." + +"Not so," said Mr. Ware, earnestly. + +"Is it not so," said the stranger, slightly bending towards him, and as +he did so, raising his hat, together with the mass of red hair which +disguised his countenance, now beaming upon him in its characteristic +and noble beauty--to which the deep black of his hair added all that was +wanting. Before, however, Mr. Ware had time to utter a word, a light +stroke of the whip sent the horse forward, and as he dashed onwards, he +cried; "Say nothing till we meet again." In a few seconds he had turned +the corner, and as Mr. Ware stood entirely bewildered with the +revelation which had burst so suddenly upon him--he heard nothing but +the echo of his horse's hoofs--as its utmost speed carried him further +away--till the last sound died upon the night air. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + + Oh, there are griefs for nature too intense, + Whose first rude shock but stupifies the soul; + Nor hath the fragile, and o'er labour'd sense, + Strength e'en to _feel_ at once their dread controul. + + But when 'tis past, that still and speechless hour + Of the sealed bosom, and the tearless eye, + Then the roused mind awakes with tenfold power, + To grasp the feelings of its agony. + + HEMANS. + + +The heavy sound of the funeral bell may, in crowded cities, lose half +its influence by falling upon ears which use has attuned to its sound; +but in a small and remote village death comes at long intervals, and +reads a more solemn lesson, lest he may be altogether forgotten. How +strange and oppressive is the sound of the minute bell--the pause--the +silence--and then the low booming sound which strikes to the heart of +the most careless, as if it would urge us while the king of terrors is +before us, and weighing oppressively on our hearts--to wake from the +lethargy of sin, and the fascinating dreams of worldly pleasure and +ambition. The air feels heavy, though on the brightest summer day, and, +though we may not waken to the things which death calls to our +remembrance, we cannot sleep as firmly as before. + +Such, perhaps, might have been the thoughts of the worthy Rector, as he +remembered many unruly members of his church, and wished that the awful +sound might waken them, to look with him beyond the dark tomb and +funeral pall, when that solemn tolling spoke to them of the fair young +child, who had departed from amongst them. As the simple procession +neared the church, those employed in clearing away the ruins, leant upon +their spades, and for awhile forgot their labour. Amy had been Mabel's +favorite messenger of mercy to the sick and afflicted, and every little +gift had come with more grace from the hands of the beautiful child; to +many a fevered couch had she carried the ripe fruit, which she had +begged from the old gardener; and many watched now with tearful eye as +she passed to her long home. Mabel followed her with feelings of +anguish, she in vain endeavoured to tranquillize, for her natural +passions were as strong as the controul she so steadily placed over +them. Captain Clair had obtained permission to attend, and those who did +not fully understand the poor child's history wondered at the emotion he +betrayed. It was a cheerless, dark day, when they laid her to rest in +her narrow bed, amongst the graves, where, led by a gentle sister's +hand, she had from infancy learned to think of + + "A heaven of joy and love," + +and to know + + "That holy children when they die, + Go to that land above." + +The remembrance of those by-gone scenes--of the sunny days of Amy's +childhood, and the earnest face with which she would listen when she +talked, came fresh to Mabel's mind; but, when she remembered that they +had not been passed so thoughtlessly as they might have been, she tried +to chase away selfish thoughts, and to turn with calm submission from +the past, which she had loved so well--to a hard and relentless future. +Yet, when the last rites had been performed, when she had gone from the +grave and again entered Aston Manor, a loneliness fell upon her heart +with cold oppressiveness. It was, perhaps, some relief to her that she +was surrounded by no familiar objects which could have recalled memory +after memory of past days. The marble staircase, and the beautiful +pictures which hung round the gallery, could form no memorial of their +neat but old-fashioned cottage, where her father's retirement, and Amy's +whole life, had been spent. The soft carpets and silk hangings could +only recall, by contrast, those which neatness and economy alone had +rendered respectable. With one glance at her black dress, which her +mother was to see for the first time, she opened the door of the room +which Mrs. Hawkins had chosen for them, and stole noiselessly in Mrs. +Lesly slept, and her faithful maid sat by her, weeping silently. It was +a relief to poor Mabel not to be obliged to speak, and she withdrew to a +window-seat, where she might think without interruption. Her mother +slept in a bed of crimson silk, which fell in graceful folds to the +ground. The whole furniture of the room was costly; pictures, of sacred +subjects, by the first masters, hung round the walls, and every comfort +which luxury could suggest, or wealth purchase, betokened the riches and +taste of the possessor of the mansion. She turned her eyes to the +window, where a view presented itself fully in keeping with the interior +of the building. The wide spreading oaks had been so arranged as to open +on a vista, which admitted the copse covered hills, beyond; while, +immediately below the windows, lay the gardens, which, like the house, +gained what they lost in size, in rich and careful cultivation, and +where now, evergreens, of all varieties, from all countries, gave a +still life to the scene. The wind had again risen, and dark clouds +chased each other over the lowering sky, such, as in our melancholy or +fanciful moods, seem the hieroglyphics by which we may read our destiny. +By how many fanciful links are we united to the invisible world. But it +was beyond the cloudy screen, that hung so darkly over the earth, that +Mabel's clear eye endeavoured to penetrate. With her hands clasped +before her, she remained gazing upon the pure sky, which at intervals +might be discovered as one cloud rolled by, though immediately followed +by another, as if the image it brought to her mind cheered and upheld +her. With childlike trust, she endeavoured to resign that which had +endeared a life, which one sorrow had done much to darken; but the duty +was a hard one. It was not easy to lose the occupation, the thought of +the present, and the preparations and visions of the future; at once, to +be forced, in stillness to think, when, before, active exertion had +found an object, and every motive an end. + +But, as she still gazed upon the scene around her, a cloud stole over +her brow, and she looked uneasily at the dark woods, which skirted the +landscape. She took a long review of the past, which, as it were, forced +itself, in this terrible hour, upon her mind; the struggle which she +recalled, had nearly cost her her life, and would have rendered life +valueless, had it not been for the victory of principle over wayward and +exorbitant passion, which, turning her thoughts inward, upon a sinful +heart, and forward, to a future, still richly blessed, taught her that, +even deprived of the blessing she had so fondly prized, she had yet +sufficient to call forth her warmest gratitude. When first she had +brought herself unflinchingly to sacrifice her love to her religion, she +might have deemed that sacrifice of her heart's best affections one +which might atone for much evil, and that, the victim of a broken heart, +she would find a martyr's grave. But there was within her a better +though a humbler seed--the germ of a higher and holier principle. It had +slept in prosperity, and the bitter tears of sorrow were needed to call +it into life. Under its influence, she learnt a truer idea of herself, +and her own duties. She found that life, though spent in weariness and +pain, is a boon of boundless blessing, since it is a working day, on +whose wages our whole happiness depends. Six years had passed since +Mabel and her lover had parted. She seemed, indeed, to those around her +to be the same being--but in herself how changed in those few years. All +that before was impulse or wayward goodness, now rose from the one pure +motive--the hope of blessing instead of being blessed. She had, +therefore, learnt to govern her temper--to give up her own selfish +inclinations--and to counteract any morbid remembrance of the past. The +habit of self control, thus earnestly acquired, she now found of avail +in the hour of need, in a way scarcely to be comprehended by the +habitual victims of weakness, or the slaves of the feelings of the hour. +She rose and left the window, and taking a seat by her mother's side, +partially screened herself from her notice, lest the first sight of her +mourning dress might too evidently recall the day's sad duties. Yet she +could not refrain from watching her as she slept, with that anxious +solicitude which Mr. Ware had foreseen would not long be absent from her +mind; for how soon she too would be removed, he feared to think. But to +Mabel's ever hopeful mind had come a doubt of her danger, which gave a +zeal to every effort to forward her recovery. Mrs. Lesly's removal to +Aston Manor--the seat of her husband's near kinsman--served to soothe +one of the few selfish feelings she possessed. There was something +peculiarly agreeable to a proud and refined mind like her own, in the +luxury with which she was surrounded, and, though she might have had +some reluctance in taking advantage of it, could her health have allowed +her removal, she quickly gave up the point, with her constitutional +indolence, and readily acquiesced in an arrangement, which, in its +general effect, soothed and gratified her. The poor and neglected widow +would spend her last days in the mansion, where she felt honor to be her +due, though she could scarcely tell why. Yet she might be forgiven the +few failings to which she was subject, and which always did more injury +to herself than others, to whom her kindness was ever most lavish. Since +her confidence with Mabel, as to the lost papers, her mind had seemed at +ease, and her daughter had skilfully prevented her recurring to the +subject, or again suffering that uneasiness which had preyed so +seriously on her mind before. Perhaps, with the vague remembrance that +Mabel had suggested something, though in reality but the quick prompting +of an affectionate heart, she had flattered herself that all was +well--and Mabel rejoiced that it was so. To say that the latter was +indifferent when she allowed herself to think, would have been untrue; +but now, with Amy, had gone, all restless doubts of the future. A steady +mind, a firm and trusting heart, and an humble, but courageous, +self-reliance, were sufficient, she felt, for her own provision, though +she would have trembled to have entrusted one so dear, and so helpless, +to such support as the brave man, sometimes, when called on, to protect +those he loves, has been seen to lose nerve through dangers which, had +he met them alone, would scarcely have excited a thought of fear. + +At length, Mrs. Lesly slowly opened her eyes, and gazed round her for a +few moments, as if to bring back the reality, and to separate it from +her dreaming fancy. Mabel shrunk slightly back; but her mother, as if +divining her motive, herself drew aside the curtain, and taking her +hand, said, gently-- + +"My sweet child, why should I fear to look upon these sad signs of your +grief? I have little cause to regret that she has gone a few days +before me. No, dear, I, who have seen so much of this cold world, could +scarcely wish to leave my darling to its stinted kindness--so young--so +helpless--and so unfriended." + +"Ah," thought Mabel, as tears rushed to her eyes, "to have begged for +her her daily bread, would have been joy to losing her." + +"I see," continued Mrs. Lesly, "that you can, with difficulty, perceive +why I speak so now; but, my Mabel, will remember, with gratitude, should +she ever suffer the unkindness of the world, that her sister shares it +not, and her noble heart will rejoice that she alone will have to bear +the trials, from which a dying mother cannot protect her." + +"Ah, Mamma, that word alone is dreadful; you must not--cannot leave me." + +"My child knows that there is a _must_, which cannot be resisted--and I +have mistaken my Mabel if she does not bow before this, with as much +courage and submission, as before every other trial. Remember your dear +father's words in his last illness--'Mabel, life is but a short campaign +after all, and you must fight to the end; who would be so cowardly as to +lay down his sword for a wound'?" + +"I will remember, dearest mamma," said Mabel, more firmly, for the words +of her father always had influence with her; "and, oh, forgive my +selfishness." + +Tears were in her mother's eyes, though her voice had been firm; and +Mabel, fearing to continue the conversation, returned to the window, and +looked out again upon the night, which was fast closing around; but +scarcely did she now heed the flitting clouds, and the coming darkness, +or the wind as it rocked the old trees, or their branches, which, by +their fantastic motion, appeared beckoning her attention; they seemed, +an hour ago, to echo back the light laugh, whose gay music she would +hear no more; but now the hour of fancy was over, and oppressed by the +real presence of grief, she bowed her head, and chastened her heart to +silence. + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + + There is one + Must be mine inmate, for I may not choose, + But love him. + + SOUTHEY. + + +On the Saturday evening of the week which had been so eventful at Aston, +the Villars family were assembled in their showily furnished +drawing-room, in Sydney Place, Bath, each engaged in different +occupations; but all eagerly expecting the promised arrival of their +rich cousin, Colonel Hargrave. The drawing-room had been studiously +arranged, and had not failed to become what it was intended to +be--tempting morning and evening lounge, where every single, and +eligible man, obtained an easy chair, an amusing chat, and a welcome, +which flattered his vanity. + +On the present occasion, the ladies of the family were all as finely and +as tastefully dressed in the newest mode, as an evening at home could +allow--and certainly, taken together, they might have been regarded as a +singularly fine family. + +Mrs. Villars we have already had occasion to describe; yet, _en +passant_, it is necessary to say that herself at Aston, (swayed by the +conflicting feelings of conscience, and her sister's straightforward +reasoning, exercised with a candour, known to their girlhood before +either had chalked out her path in life,) was a very different +personage, indeed, to Mrs. Villars in Bath. The stately importance, or +smiling dignity, with which she received her levy of morning callers, or +evening guests, showed no wavering conscience, or doubtful heart. A +certain degree of intrigue many might have detected; but in the mother +of so large and fair a family that was easily forgiven; and, while the +gaiety of her conversation rendered her ever a welcome and popular +guest, the size of her rooms, and brilliancy of her parties rendered her +a valuable hostess. She was now moving about the room to adjust +something or other, or taking a peep at the dining-table, to secure +herself against anything which might give a bad impression to the +expected guest. + +Next, if not first, in dignity, stood her daughter Caroline. She was +certainly beautiful, though rather fine than engaging, and her +expression was haughty and severe--yet beautiful she certainly was, if +the most perfect outline of feature is beauty. In figure she was above +the middle height; but this was modified by a well rounded person, and a +certain academical grace of movement. Her person did not belie her +character; she did not rate herself below her real value, and might, +indeed, often have erred on the wrong side. In her manners, she was +overbearing, but seldom unlady-like. She was talented, yet wanted +solidity--haughty and ill-tempered, yet seldom mean, unless greatly +tempted. In her own family she rivalled her mother's influence--being a +sort of person over whom it was very difficult to have authority. Her +age was something beyond thirty, and the remembrance that, with all her +beauty, she was still unmarried, gave her mind a sourness which greatly +embittered the comfort of the circle of which she formed so prominent a +part. On the present occasion, however, she was in one of her best +moods, for, slow to take warning from the past, she looked on future +conquest as certain. The expected arrival of Colonel Hargrave, about +whom, for the last few months, she had been incessantly rallied by her +mother and sisters, gave a brilliancy to her color, and a radiancy to +her large black eyes--and as she leant over her harp, rambling over a +few airs, which might form a romantic greeting to him, Mrs. Villars +looked upon her with satisfied triumph. To tell the truth, she was very +much afraid of her on account of the haughty and imperious temper, +which, in childhood, she had forgotten to guide, and looked upon no +scheme for the benefit of her family, with more interest than on the one +which might secure Caroline a settlement, which would satisfy her +temper, bring honor on herself, and, not least, remove her from all +rivalry with her younger sisters. She had, therefore, on the present +occasion, been spared nothing which could coax her wayward humour into +rendering itself as fascinating as possible--for well did Mrs. Villars +know that by a little ill-timed opposition, her anger might be roused, +and thus all hopes of her settling be lost. Her expensive taste had, +therefore, been for the last few weeks fully gratified, though Mrs. +Villars trembled at every request which she feared to refuse. Selina, +her second sister, was lounging about the room, sometimes taking up an +old album, or a piece of knitting, and wondering where the Colonel could +be. She was a very fair-skinned, fair-haired girl, with very light blue +eyes--bearing an expression of indolent, good nature. Her prevailing +taste was dancing, of which she was _passionately fond_. Less talented +than her elder sister, she yet understood better how to render herself +acceptable in society. The pretty lisp with which she often declined +attempting a difficult song, was by many deemed more pleasing than her +sister's perfect execution of it; and the many pretty nothings about +nothing, with which she entertained her partner in the dance, or the +smile which meant anything he liked to interpret from it, was often +preferred to Caroline's more sensible conversation. She was not, +however, so silly as she sometimes chose to appear; a quiet sense of +self-preservation usually befriended her, and rendered her sufficiently +alive to her own interest. But though very generally liked, she was not +often seriously admired. + +Our friend Lucy was seated on a stool near the fire, seemingly anxious +to catch the fitful light as it fell upon a picture of Finella, (her +intended character for the fancy ball,) which she held in her hand. It +might have been that she remembered something of the time when Captain +Clair had so earnestly dissuaded her from going to that very ball, for +the color came and went upon her cheeks as if her thoughts were far from +the present scene, and as if they so much occupied her as to prevent her +feeling the tedium of expectation. + +Maria, the youngest of the sisters, was standing by her, trying, at +times, to rally her by remarks which dyed her cheek still deeper, though +she remained determinately inattentive to them. + +Over Maria her mother had spent many a desponding hour; to her, beauty +was everything, and the beauty so lavishly given to her other daughters, +was in Maria singularly wanting. Maria, however, possessed more energy +than the others, and was not disposed to weep over a deficiency, which +she very justly considered to be no fault of hers. Her mouth indeed was +very misshapen, and her nose anything but Grecian--but the irregularity +of these features was very much redeemed by a pair of handsome eyes, +which, though they sometimes sparkled with satire, as often sparkled +with fun, in which she peculiarly delighted, though, unfortunately, it +occasionally degenerated into vulgarity. She had sufficient common sense +to know that if she remained inactive, comparisons, which in most cases +are odious, would be doubly so between herself and her sisters, and she +seldom allowed her tongue to be sufficiently silent to lead any one to +take the trouble to scan her countenance; and, perhaps, the knowledge of +her own deficiency did much to compensate for its existence. + +One of the first exclamations a stranger would feel inclined to make, on +an introduction to this family circle, would be--Why are all these girls +unmarried? but no satisfactory answer could be given. Maria suggested, +when the subject was discussed in private, that luck was against them. +They were sought for, invited out, admired, flirted with by a host of +young men, who professed they would have died to serve them, but somehow +forgot to make those bona fide proposals, which would probably have been +of more service to them than their deaths. + +In leaving the description of Mr. Villars to the last, we are only +following a fashion which was too prevalent in his household. There was +little that was striking in his first appearance; he was only very +thoughtful, very gentle, and very gentlemanly. He was the younger son of +a wealthy merchant, and had been placed, much against his inclinations, +in a firm of some consequence in London. His natural tastes led him to +prefer rather classical studies, than the active part in the world of +business for which his father designed him. Respect for parental +authority, however, prevented his choosing his own profession, in +opposition to it; and, being a man of high principle, he resolved that +the dislike he entertained for his employment, should not prevent his +vigorously exerting himself in the state of life in which he found +himself. His prudence was rewarded, and during the thirty years which he +had unrepiningly given to his business, he was fortunate enough to +realize a fortune which enabled him to retire from it, and having amply +provided for his family, by insurances effected on his own life, he was +enabled, during his lifetime, to gratify both himself and them in every +reasonable way. Having ceased to take any active share in the business, +he removed to Bath, where he hoped to find gaiety sufficient to satisfy +their wishes, while he indulged his dearly prized leisure in literary +pursuits. This plan, however, failed to answer his expectations; his +former occupations had given him little time to inspect personally the +rising characters of his children, who had been left entirely to their +mother's guidance, and he now found, when too late, that they were +little calculated to form that domestic circle towards which, through +so many long years, he had looked, as the haven of his rest. His tastes +were not theirs, and the self denying love which can atone for such +deficiencies, had, in their education, been forgotten. They were fond of +him in their own way, but this did not prevent their finding the time +spent in his study, in hunting for a lost passage, in a favorite author, +or listening to some of his own elegant compositions, very dull +indeed--though many efforts did he make to overcome this difficulty, and +to find one, at least, amongst his four daughters, who might make a +pleasant companion; but he had not the heart to command the attentions +which he well knew love alone could supply, and with a sigh, he retired, +not only companionless, but with a lower idea of his own merits than +they deserved. The greater part of his time was now spent alone, in a +way which little suited his gentle and domestic disposition; and, +contented with holding the reins of domestic government, in serious +matters, he let smaller arrangements take their course, without +troubling or interesting himself in them. Such was the family group +assembled to welcome Colonel Hargrave. The hour appointed, had, however, +long passed; Mr. Villars had taken out his watch for the twentieth time, +and now stood with it in his hand. Mrs. Villars wearied of her repeated +messages to the kitchen to put off the dinner, and Caroline looked +lowering for a storm. But nothing availed; quarter followed quarter, +counted by impatient minutes. Yet, still, Mrs. Villars referred to the +Colonel's note, which she carefully carried in her bag, and again and +again read his promise to be with them at the time mentioned, in order +that he might accompany them to the ball on the Monday. She had boasted +of this, in no unsparing language, and, should he fail her now, her +mortification would be complete. Still, concealing her own fears, she +glanced, every now and then, entreatingly, at her daughter. + +At length, Mr. Villars declared he would wait no longer. This resolution +being at length carried, they adjourned, in no very agreeable mood, to +the dining-room, to partake of a fine dinner, completely spoilt. Mr. +Villars, feeling annoyed at the disrespect which a neglected appointment +often implies, was not in the best possible humour, and his wife, eager +to support the popularity of her unknown favorite, was obliged to +exercise no small rhetoric to make all smooth. But when she looked at +Caroline, and saw the cloud of ill-humour gathering fast, and, as +quickly shading her beauty, she as fervently wished he would stay away +for that night, at least, as she had before been eager for his arrival. +This last wish was fully gratified, for the evening wore away, and yet +no Hargrave made his appearance. + + + + +CHAPTER V. + + At me you smiled, but unbeguiled, + I saw the snare and I retired. + + TENNYSON. + + +The Monday appointed for the fancy ball arrived, and still nothing had +been heard of Hargrave. Mrs. Villars fretted, and Caroline assumed a +haughty and sulky indifference. During the day, every knock and ring +brought disappointment, till the lateness of the hour warned them to +prepare for the ball. It was then that Caroline, for the first time, +announced her intention of remaining at home. In vain did Mrs. Villars +remonstrate that her fancy Sultana's dress had cost more than twice as +much as her sisters', and it was of as little use to flatter her vanity +by representing that she would be the most elegantly dressed in the +whole ball-room; Caroline's temper was not to be conquered in a single +night. Tired of persuasion, her mother stormed, and changing entreaties +for threats, commanded her to go; but Caroline was obstinate, and +nothing but bodily force could have moved her from the arm-chair, in +which she had settled herself for the evening, with a candle close to +her elbow, and a new novel in her lap. She would not go, she declared, +with a haughtiness which would have suited a more unworthy proposal. Nor +would she move from her chair, even to give the assistance of her advice +at her sisters' toilet, or, in any other way betray the slightest +interest in an amusement for which they had all been so long and so +busily preparing. + +Extremely chagrined, Mrs. Villars was compelled to submit, and, as she +gave a last glance at the beautiful velvet dress which taste and money +had alike been expended to prepare, the bitterness of her disappointment +was not a little increased by remembering that this fruitless purchase +had been made with part of the loan so hardly wrung from her sister; and +it was with an uneasy sensation of annoyance, that she led her fair +daughters that night into the crowded ball-room. + +Lucy, with a heart upon the rebound, and flushed with the determination +of piquing Clair, if possible, had never looked more lovely than she did +that night. A white dress of the greatest simplicity distinguished her +character, as Finella, while her long light curls fell in careless +tresses over her neck and shoulders, forming a veil, which enhanced the +beauty they seemed bent upon concealing. How wildly beat the heart in +that illregulated bosom? Her simply going to the ball would, she +imagined, shew herself free from any deference to Arthur Clair's +opinion, and if any thoughts of Amy Lesly came unbidden amongst the +revelry, she banished the remembrance by a lighter laugh or a bolder +sally. She could not fail to attract attention, and many strangers were +anxious to be introduced to the fairy Villars, as she was that night +called; but one only attracted, and soon absorbed her attention, he was +a young man of a prepossessing appearance, with large melting eyes and a +low persuasive voice. Evidently attracted by her appearance, he had +obtained an introduction, under the name of Beauclerc. He waltzed to +perfection, and the implied compliments he every now and then offered, +in a tone and voice of great sweetness, Lucy took for deeper homage than +he perhaps intended, and the ready blush deepened on her cheek, and her +eye sparkled when she suffered herself to be led to a seat apart from +the dancers, where his witty remarks afforded her ample amusement. So +readily, indeed, flowed his language, that the absent Clair sunk into +nothing, a mere every-day flirt, compared with this fascinating new +acquaintance. Besides, he possessed the power of drawing her out, and +made her feel quite clever, by leading her to display herself in a new +light. He listened to her remarks with the most flattering attention, +and resigned her to the gentleman who next claimed her hand for the +dance, with apparent reluctance. She was then surprised to find that she +had as little to say as formerly, and that her new partner's +observations on the fashionable news of the day had become quite +uninteresting. She was not, therefore, sorry to find Mr. Beauclerc again +by her side, when the dance was over, and she had taken a seat by her +mamma. + +"Can you tell me?" she said, turning to him, with a smile, "why, just +now, I had plenty to say, but immediately I began to dance with that +gentleman, I felt so dull I could not say any thing at all. I have been +labouring at conversation, I assure you, with as much industry and +dulness as the noted donkey at Carrisbrooke Castle employs in his task, +but with far less success, for he succeeds in fetching up some water--I +am afraid I cannot say the same, of a single idea. Would you believe +that I twice observed on the band, once on the room, and three times on +the lights. Can you tell me why, since you seem to have the genius of +explaining every thing?" + +A well pleased smile passed over his lips as he replied, only, by taking +out a small hunting watch which he quietly opened, and then handing it +to her, he presented her at the same time with the key of his +_escritoir_. + +"Will you," said he "oblige me by winding this watch." + +"Oblige you," replied Lucy, laughing, "by breaking the spring, I +suppose--that key belongs to your desk." + +"You give me the very answer I desired. You cannot wind my watch, +because I have not given you the right key. This illustrates what I am +going to say. + +"There are some minds suited to other minds, as this watch is to its +key. This beautiful piece of mechanism," said he, playing with the +watch in his hand, "would be to me, or to any one else, perfectly +useless without the key, which, however simple in its construction, is +yet so necessary to the watch, that it alone can render it of any +service. It is so with the human mind, we may live for years without +being fortunate enough to meet with one answering mind which can unlock +the treasures of our heart, and the secret springs of feeling, and of +thought, and bring them into exercise. It is the sympathy of those +around us which we need, the power which others possess of understanding +us; to place ourselves in a true light--do you understand me?" + +"Partly," replied Lucy, hesitating, and looking down. + +"Partly, but not entirely," returned Mr. Beauclerc, repeating her words, +with an emphasis, which argued a slight degree of superiority, to which +Lucy readily bowed. "Yet I would say you were made to enjoy these +things as well as understand them. Nay, you must not think me rude if I +say I read as much when first introduced to you; and that I felt I +should be understood if I ventured to speak in a way which the world too +often ridicules, because it does not comprehend it. It is only the +simple language of truth; yet, because it is not exactly the same as the +hacknied language of the world, it is regarded as nonsense." + +Lucy did not quite understand all he said, but she felt that she was +receiving an admiration more flattering, because paid to her +understanding; and she only broke up the conversation after repeated +invitations to the dance, and her pulse fluttered quickly as she heard, +or fancied she heard, a sigh from the accomplished Beauclerc, as she +gracefully resigned herself to a young officer, upon whose arm she was +soon whirled past him in the giddy round. + +Mrs. Villars smiled with secret pride, when some of her friends rallied +her on her daughter's conquest, and she took an early opportunity of +asking a friend who he might be. + +"Have you not heard?" was the reply, "that he has brought his own +carriage, and two hunters, to the Castle, and Ball--and, besides, his +person speaks for itself, it is so _distingué_." + +Mrs. Villars sought for Lucy, to impart these particulars, but was not +sorry to find her waltzing with Mr. Beauclerc. + +"What a handsome couple they would make," thought she; "and, oh, if +Caroline and Hargrave were but here, I should be quite happy." But she +little dreamt of the pleasure yet in store for that evening. + +Mr. Villars soon beginning to feel impatient, she was compelled to draw +her party together. Beauclerc accompanied them to the door; and as he +handed Lucy into the carriage, she fancied his hand trembled. With this +pleasing impression, she leant back in the fly which conveyed them home, +and gave herself up to pleasant reverie, and castle building. She ran +over every word which had passed in their long conversations, and +thought they were an easy beginning to a more pleasing acquaintance +than they often met with--she began then to feel quite surprised that +she ever had given a tear to Captain Clair. + +"Willingly," she said to herself; "will I resign him to Mabel, if she +will have him; yet there was something in him I liked, though I cannot +well remember what it was now. Why, he never talked in six weeks, half +the sense which Mr. Beauclerc has thrown into one conversation. I feel +quite grateful to him for deserting me, since, otherwise, I never should +have met this very superior man, who, as he himself observed, though not +in plain words exactly, possesses the key to my mind--and does not that +seem like affection?" + +These pleasing considerations were interrupted by their stopping at +their own door, paying the driver, and running gaily up stairs. + +"Hark," said Mrs. Villars, "there are voices in the drawing-room, I am +certain. There are, I do believe." + +"Why mamma," said Maria, who, with more courage, had applied her eye to +the key-hole; it is only Caroline talking to somebody. When, upon this +information, they opened the door, Caroline was discovered +_tête-à -tête_, with a strange gentleman, with as much ease and +nonchalance as if at the regular calling hour. + +There was a slight tone of triumph in her voice as she said:-- + +"Colonel Hargrave, papa?" + +"Oh, Colonel," said Mrs. Villars, taking the words out of her husband's +mouth; "I can scarcely forgive you for obliging us to go to the ball +without you." + +"He has excused himself most ably," said Caroline; "the death of a +friend detained him." + +"I assure you," said he, with the greatest courtesy, "that nothing but +so serious a reason would have prevented my keeping my appointment; and +I trust, my dear sir, that you will excuse my keeping your dinner +waiting on Saturday; but, as I said, just now, some very sad +circumstances detained me on my road." + +"Pray, say not another word," said Mrs. Villars; "we are very sorry for +you, I am sure." + +"I suppose," said Maria, "you did not arrive in time to join us?" + +"Do you think," said Caroline, "that he could go to a fancy ball after +attending the death-bed of a friend?" + +"No, truly," said he, "I was in no humor for such gaiety, and was more +pleased by the quiet welcome I have already received." + +"Caroline has only expressed the feelings we should all entertain," said +Mrs. Villars, smiling benignly, "and, indeed, I am most happy to see my +truant nephew, at last." + +Hargrave slightly started at the word nephew, not being able to divine +how his distant connection with the family could be twisted into so +close a relationship. + +"I trust," continued Mrs. Villars, "that Caroline has taken every care +of you, and that you have had some refreshment." + +"Indeed she has been most kind," replied he politely. "She would not +allow me to persuade her to retire to rest, when I had once announced my +intention of remaining up to introduce myself. I will, however, no +longer tax your patience; but will go to my own room, if you will allow +me." + +They accordingly separated, the Colonel lingering to say a few words to +his host, and the ladies retiring to a kind of mutual dressing-room. + +"Well, my love," said Mrs. Villars to her eldest daughter, "I will never +blame you again, for I see you know how to manage without my +interference. Nothing could have turned out better." + +She felt, indeed, half inclined to idolise her, for the very ill-temper, +which, in the early part of the evening, she had more justly blamed. +Caroline, in her turn, looked upon them all with an air of superiority, +as if the accident had been the result of her prudence. + +"Indeed," she said, "he is a most sensible and entertaining man, and, I +dare say, if the truth were known, my evening was the most pleasant +after all." + +"Not quite," replied Lucy, "for I also met with a most sensible and +entertaining man." + +"Yes," echoed Maria, "such a handsome man too--Hargrave is nothing to +him. Every one was wondering who he was, and remarking on his attentions +to Lucy." + +"What, is Lucy taken in again?" said Caroline, with jealous bitterness. +"I thought once in a season was sufficient." + +Lucy coloured deeply and angrily, for it was not the first wound she had +received. + +"Well," said she to herself, "I will be closer this time--I will have no +one to abuse my confidence by taunting speeches." + +"Come, come," interposed Mrs. Villars, "do not let us quarrel with +fortune; for my part, I feel inclined to be on good terms with all the +world. Nothing could have been more propitious than your meeting in such +a romantic manner. What were you doing when he came in?--at your harp, +I hope. Well, how do you like him?" + +"Why, Mamma, I think you believe in love at first sight. I am not so +easily won." + +"Nor the Colonel either, I dare say," said Maria. + +"I will thank you, Miss Maria, to remember what you say, and to whom you +say it." + +"That I very seldom forget," retorted Maria, as she laid down her Swiss +hat and ribbons, with a sigh, to think that she might not display them +again. + +"Come, come," again urged Mrs. Villars, "surely, Caroline, you can give +us your opinion of him. You are so quick at reading character." + +"That may be," replied Caroline, "but I scarcely think the right +advantage to take of discrimination is to retail a private conversation, +for the sake of subjecting a friend to everybody's quizzing +observations." + +Here she glanced angrily at Maria. + +"Well," returned the latter, perfectly undisturbed, "is it come to +friend and private, already, that, at least, sounds like something, and +if you will conquer the good nabob in your own way, I suppose we must +excuse being kept in the dark, as the cat politely observed to the +mouse, when he was introduced to him in the cupboard." + +"I think he is very handsome," said Selina. + +"Yes," said Maria, "well enough since he possesses good eyes, good +teeth, good forehead, nose and eyes--all tolerably well put together. +Yes, I suppose he might be called handsome. I will ask Miss Foster, she +is such a judge of masculine beauty." + +"I beg you will do no such thing," said Caroline; "he must be considered +as one of our own family, and I do not see what right Miss Foster has to +pass her observations on us." + +"I am afraid you are not quite so rigid with regard to Miss Lovelace," +retorted Maria. + +Mrs. Villars saw that much bitter remark was rising, and knowing that +nothing could be obtained from Caroline, dismissed the conclave, which +had assembled at so late an hour, only in consequence of the importance +of affairs under deliberation; and she retired to rest satisfied with +the course events had taken, and fully impressed with respect for +Caroline's judgment. She, meanwhile, in the retirement of her own room, +condescended to give Selina an account of the evening's conversation, by +which means Mrs. Villars heard the whole the next day from Selina, whose +more gentle temper rendered her the general recipient of her mother's +schemes. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + + He walked he knew not whither; + Doubt was on his daily path; and duties shewed not certain. + + TUPPER. + + +Colonel Hargrave was a little past the age when hearts are easily +won--and the ready courtesy with which he had performed his part of the +evening _tête-à -tête_, might have shown a less prejudiced judge, that he +was too accustomed to beauty, grace, and all the endless charms so +bewitching to a younger man, to make him very easily fall into the +snare which had been laid for him. + +However, he had but very lately landed in England, after some years +spent in the East; and though like most English travellers, he had been, +at first, delighted with the marvels and records of ancient days, which +that quarter of the globe so lavishly affords, as well as with the +customs and habits of a people with whom he had delighted to mingle, he +was not sorry to find himself once again in merry, busy England--one of +a people whose interests are more of the present than of the past, where +the rapid march of improvement and discovery, form a striking contrast +to the splendid dreams of past Eastern glory. Then the comfort of social +society--home with all its thousand associations of comfort and +tranquillity were not indifferent to him, and he was not sorry to find a +gayer welcome than the lonely halls of his own beautiful Aston might +have offered him. His sleeping apartment had been arranged with a care +that made it seem luxurious after the cabin fare to which he had lately +been accustomed, and he paid more attention to the trifles which +surrounded him than he had ever before done, for of such trifles he, for +the first time, perceived the importance, since all combined gave a +feeling of homely comfort which he felt he had scarcely missed till now, +when once more in the enjoyment of it. Opening from this room was +another, arranged with the most studious attention to ease and +appearance. A fire blazed a warm welcome, after his day's journey, and +everything conspired to make his little sitting-room one suited to a +gentleman's fancy--and by affording him a place of retreat, he perceived +that he would be allowed to enjoy the company of his cousins only when +he was inclined. In all this there was such an evident desire to please, +that he could not help feeling a little flattered, though, perhaps, as +representative of the family credit and opulence, he might, at the same +time, have felt it to be his due, and a necessary appendage to the +invitation. + +Tempted by the blazing fire, he threw himself upon the horse-hair sofa, +which was near it, and fixed his eyes upon its flickering and varying +light, but as he did so, his countenance soon lost the air of courteous +pleasantry, which had a short while before possessed it, and he appeared +lost in deep and even bitter thought. + +The grave accusations of old Giles, and the lighter description of +Clair, were both true; and yet a few words more of his mental history is +needed fully to unravel his character. + +During the life of his mother, he had been the pride of her existence, +and keenly sensible of the quicksands which await the young man on his +entrance into life--she had watched his opening manhood with the most +tender solicitude. Her death, however, left him entirely to the care of +his father--and he, thinking the hot-house system of preservation no +longer befitting a youth of talent and ability, sent him abroad, first +with a tutor, and afterwards alone, in order that he might acquire a +knowledge of the world, and the ease, conversation, and polish, which +foreign travel is calculated to give. In this he was fully successful. A +short residence in the gayest city in Europe, so called forth young +Hargrave's natural refinement of taste, that few could find fault with +the manners of the finished gentleman whom Paris sent back from its +school. But in Paris he had been thrown with those of professed Infidel +principles--and amongst them he found men of superior talent and great +intellect, who, while they extorted his own secret admiration, rendered +him a homage to his youthful talent of the most flattering kind. By them +he was rashly led to argue on the tenets of natural and revealed +religion, and to discuss points, which are rather matter for faith than +comprehension--and he entered on these questions with a spirit of which +older men have not been innocent, rather seeking to display his own +powers in the argument, than to do honor to the truth. The contest was +eagerly courted by those who only kept their hearts at ease by engaging +in the excitement of perpetual warfare. They were subtle reasoners, and +Hargrave found himself coping with them, only with the greatest +difficulty. + +But, who can unlock the secret mysteries of the human mind, or give a +clue to its strange inconsistencies? Even while he argued, the dreadful +doubt passed into his own mind, and, wondering and amazed, he found +himself an unbeliever in the faith he had so warmly defended! Too often +have those who have become the most devoted christians at an after +period of their life, had to mourn such infidelity, though, for a time +only; and had Hargrave resorted to the simple means used by his old +tenant, whom his thoughtless words had led astray, he, like old Giles, +might have been restored to comfort--but he only rushed deeper and +deeper into argument, and the more confirmed in error--he, at length, +ended by declaring himself vanquished, and thanking his new friends for +having opened his eyes to his own superstition. Thus eagerly received +by a brilliant _coterie_, adorned by wit, genius, and learning, he +learnt to boast of the sentiments he at first deplored, and to wonder +that he should have been weak enough to recognise any other. + +Where then was the reward for a mother's untiring self-devoted love to +her son, through the years of infancy and youth? Despair not, fond +mothers--"cast thy bread upon the waters, for thou shalt find it after +many days"--after _many_ days, remember, and be patient. + +One result, was, however, evident in this wild fit of +recklessness--under the pretence of keeping his intellect pure and +unclouded, he preserved the same rigid principles she had recommended, +and in this he was firm, spite of the ribaldry of his companions. "No +one," he said, proudly, "should be able to affirm that he had abandoned +his religion because too weak to obey its laws." His friends, therefore, +left off their jests and boasted that no professor of revealed religion +could be a better moralist, or a more virtuous man. But such virtue +must ever be but an unsteady light, which is founded on no firmer basis +than self-opinion, and Hargrave might have started when in foreign +lands, he had lavished the most profuse charity on those around him, had +he remembered how blind he was to the wants and sufferings of those who +at home called him master. + +Too late his father's death summoned him to Aston, to take possession of +the immense wealth which he thus inherited. After but a brief stay, +events induced him to leave his native country, and entering the Indian +army, he sought employment for his restless energies on the banks of the +Indus. There his military career had not been without honor, and why he +had returned to England, scarcely himself could tell. + +There he sat, an older, if not a wiser and better man. Dark thoughts, +like heavy clouds, seemed to pass over his mind, as with his hand +supporting his head, he gazed fixedly, but vacantly on the fire. +Perhaps he was thinking of his early days, and of the mother who had +taught him to hallow them. Perhaps he was remembering how unable he had +been to build the fabric even of human and short lived earthly +happiness, on so weak and failing a foundation as his own unassisted +virtue. For, to his heart, common joys had been tainted. The sabbath +chaunt had brought no melody to his ear, reminding him of the rest which +its Maker had hallowed. "The gentle flowers that stooping o'er the +wilderness--speak of joy, and faith, and love," had seemed to him only a +difficult clause in the argument of an adversary. Such might have been +the dark remembrances of the hour, for he swayed himself to and fro, as +if in an agony of spirit, nor did he retire to rest till the grey dawn +warned him of the necessity of seeking repose. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + Wisdom revenges, said + The world; is quick and deadly of resentment; + Thrusts at the very shadow of affront, + And hastes by death to wipe its honor clean. + + POLLOCK. + + +The next morning Lucy was down stairs by eight o'clock, appearing +scarcely to feel any fatigue from the gaieties of the last evening. The +servants, taking advantage of their mistress's slumbers, had not been +very careful to rouse themselves early; and as Lucy wandered about the +house, she found nothing but rooms half closed, and maids with sweeping +brushes, dusters, and open windows, forming no tempting welcome on a +cold morning. Yet, chill as was prospect both within and without, she +felt nothing cheerless that morning, and, putting on her bonnet and +cloak, she went out, saying she would be back by breakfast time. She +found the atmosphere thick and humid, and cold drops quickly gathered on +her veil. The streets, under the influence of a slight thaw, were wet +with black mud; but she quickly threaded her way through them, till +reaching Milsom Street, she took her way towards the higher parts of the +town. Few people were stirring, shops were only just open, and the +occupiers engaged in filling their empty windows with a display for the +day. The light-hearted girl scarcely giving a thought to any thing +around her, soon reached the Circus, a fine but gloomy part of the town. +Time and the weather have cast a black shade over its formerly clean +white stone, which gives it an appearance of sadness, which is shared by +the sombre hue of the evergreens, which ornament its garden. To one of +its houses Lucy hurried, and after a short pause, was ushered into it by +an old man, apparently butler in the establishment. The room into which +she was shown, was upon the ground floor, and shared in no very slight +degree, the appearance of the outside of the buildings. Its furniture +was dark green, and the curtains, with their many heavy folds had been +suffered to trespass too much upon the windows. There was an oak +wainscoting round the room, and here and there some old portrait frowned +down from the walls. The room was rather long than wide, and lighted by +windows only on the one side, looking on the street; this often made it +appear dark, but, in contrast to every thing about the place, a bright +fire blazed upon the hearth, and a small table, with a snowy cloth, +supported the hissing urn, and a frugal but snug breakfast. Seated +beside it was rather a young looking lady. There was a certain air of +unmistakeable dignity over her whole appearance; her features, though +irregular, were intellectual and commanding, and the sparkling eye +wandered with restless energy. Her hair was black as an Indian's, and +she might have been called beautiful, but for the melancholy, which, as +a veil, seemed thrown round her, stilling every quicker impulse into +chill composure. She held the _Times_ in her hand, folded at the leading +article, but she laid it down and rose, on Lucy's entrance, with a look +of surprise and pleasure. + +"Why love," said she, "I thought you would be sleeping for an hour or +two yet, after the fatigues of last night. I am sure no common event +would bring you out this foggy morning, but sit down and I will give you +some breakfast, for I am sure you have had none; let me take off your +shawl, and then you shall have some of your favorite chocolate, and tell +me your news as you drink it." + +"I could not sleep," said Lucy, "and as no one was up I thought I would +come and see why you were not at the ball as you promised last night." + +"My poor uncle was so bad with his gout, that I had not the resolution +to leave him, and you know how little will tempt me to stay away from +such things," said Miss Foster, with a sigh. + +"Ah," said Lucy, smiling, "clever people like you do not need such +frivolities; but what would my poor vacant brain do without them." + +"Why is it vacant? But you have not, like me, given up the phantom +happiness, or you would prefer seeking something more substantial." + +Lucy glanced at the leading article, and gave a slight shrug. + +"You may come to that at last," replied her friend, with a moonlight +smile, which passed almost immediately away, "really you do not know +what a pleasure the morning papers give me--they make me remember that +I am a denizen of the world, and besides, a daughter of England, and +then I forget how lonely I am as an individual." + +"But why lonely," returned Lucy, "the slightest effort on your part +would surround you with friends, and you might have a host of +acquaintances instead of my poor self, whom alone you admit, and I enjoy +that privilege, merely from accident." + +"You do not quite know me yet," said Miss Foster, "such society is no +longer tolerable. And I might never have known even you, had not your +horse thrown you at our very door, and forced me to open it. There was, +indeed, something so pleasing in being able to nurse you for a few days, +that I became insensibly attached to you. But such accidents seldom +occur, and I care not to go through the common ordeal of acquiring +acquaintances." + +"Well," said Lucy, "when I am inclined to turn anchorite, Millie, you +must let me in, and I will come and live with you; but I am rather of +opinion that the world is a mirror which reflects back our smiles and +our frowns." + +"Is that sentiment your own?" enquired her companion, quickly. + +"No--second hand from a delightful partner that I met last night. Such a +very nice man--quite beyond my poor powers of description; everything he +said was so clever, and so new, it seemed as if he had read more of the +human heart than any one I ever met. He talked to me nearly all the +evening." + +"Imprudent girl!" exclaimed Miss Foster. + +"Oh, if you take everything I say so seriously," said Lucy, poutingly, +"I will not tell you anything." + +"What kind of looking man was he?" said Miss Foster, without heeding her +remark. + +"He must be thirty, at least," said Lucy--"with light brown hair, deep +blue eyes, rather tall, and very nice looking--not quite so handsome as +Captain Clair; but then his talking was the fascinating part." + +"And what did he talk about?" + +"Oh, nothing in particular," said Lucy, coloring. + +"And did you hear his name?" enquired Miss Foster, almost restraining +her breath. + +"Beauclerc," said Lucy; "is it not a pretty name?" + +"You must have nothing more to say to him, if he talks such in a way +that you blush already. Will you promise me?" said she, most violently. + +"You must give me some reason." + +"Imprudent girl, you must take my warning." + +"If he were making love, I might consider," said Lucy; "but, as a common +acquaintance, and a delightful dancer, you must give me some reason for +cutting him." + +"You are rash," repeated Miss Foster; "do not have anything to say to +him, or you will repent it." + +"I am not to be led blind-folded," said Lucy; "and you must prove me in +danger before I can think such advice needed. Pray let us talk of +something else--my poor _beaux_ always tease you." + +There was a very palpable tinge of vanity in this last remark, which +caused Miss Foster to bite her lips, as if suppressing violent emotion, +and to remain silent, though the uneasy flash of her dark eye betrayed +something of the violence of her temper. + +At this inopportune moment, a knock at the hall door announced another +early visitor. + +The door of their sitting-room was, after an interval of some minutes, +cautiously opened by the venerable butler, who, with some embarrassment, +presented a card to his mistress on a silver salver. + +Lucy almost trembled as she saw that the storm which had been gathering +on her friend's countenance was now ready to burst forth. + +Her cheeks, which had a moment before been brightly flushed, turned to a +livid white, as she brushed the card from the salver without touching +it, and then stamped upon it with impotent violence. + +Lucy's eyes fell upon the name--it was that of "Beauclerc"--and, +unperceived, she took it up, and concealed it in the folds of her dress +from further indignity. + +"I am not at home," said Miss Foster, in a decisive tone to the aged +butler, who regarded the scene with more concern than surprise, and left +the room slowly and sadly. The front door was presently heard to close. +As if ashamed of the passion into which she had been betrayed, Miss +Foster seated herself, at once, and tried to resume her usual coldness +of demeanor. + +"See," said she, "the way in which I dare to treat him, and judge for +yourself if he is worthy to be received as an admirer of yours." + +"I think," said Lucy, recovering her animation, "you have shewn yourself +very little my friend to treat a man with indignity, when I had +expressed a contrary opinion of him." + +Miss Foster regarded her rising spleen with an indifferent coldness, +which made her still more angry. + +"I say," she reiterated, "that it is a most unkind and ungrateful way of +returning my confidence." + +"Wilful child!" exclaimed Miss Foster, "will you never be guided for +your own advantage?" + +"I am no child!" exclaimed Lucy; "and if I do choose a guide, it shall +be one who can rule her own temper." + +"You should allow for the emotion you cannot understand," said Miss +Foster, gravely; "but leave me now, Lucy, and do not be angry--we are +both excited--and may say things we do not mean." + +"Leave you," exclaimed her offended friend, starting up, and putting on +her shawl with trembling hands--"I will not stay another moment where I +am not wanted." + +Miss Foster's head had sunk upon her hand, perhaps she was too deeply +absorbed in her own feelings to notice Lucy's anger, till suddenly +raising her eyes, in which thick tears were gathering--she watched her +movements with a curious interest--but Lucy was already at the +door--and gasping a "good morning," she hurried away, leaving her friend +to the unpleasant thoughts she was indulging. + +It was not anger alone which led Lucy to leave the house so hastily, for +she was curious to see her pleasing companion of the night before, if +but for a moment. She was not disappointed, for, as she opened the door, +she perceived him standing on the other side of the way. + +Could he have seen her enter the house? and, might not his having done +so, been the reason of his early call on Miss Foster. Vanity is a ready +prompter; and she had not proceeded many steps before she believed the +delusive argument, and attributed her friend's warnings to jealousy. She +had scarcely arrived at this conclusion, before she perceived Mr. +Beauclerc crossing to her side of the way, and she gave a bow and a +smile, which proved a ready inducement for him to join her. He looked so +dejected, that she had not the heart to check his intention of lounging +by her side, and he was far too courtly and ready in his manners to give +such a meeting the least appearance of awkwardness. + +"You are acquainted with the lady of that house then?" he enquired, +after a slight pause in the conversation. + +"Yes," said Lucy, smiling and looking at him, "and I suspect you know +her also." + +"Do you know her well?" he said, slightly colouring. + +"Oh, very intimately--she is a great friend of mine." + +"You know all her secrets then?" + +"Well, I dare say I do," she replied, smiling importantly; for, to +confess that she had a friend, and did not know all her secrets, seemed +a derogation from her own dignity; "but, I fear I shall not know many +more, for we have parted in anger." + +"Indeed! can that be true--you in anger." + +"Yes, yes," said Lucy, looking archly at him; "and what do you think it +could be about?" + +"I have, indeed, no means of guessing," he replied, with an interest +which Lucy attributed rather to herself than her subject. + +"About yourself, it was then?" said she, looking slightly aside. + +"Impossible!" he exclaimed, delightedly; "have you then been speaking of +me?--and what did she say of me?" + +"Nothing you would, perhaps, like to hear," she said, with the same +archness as before. + +"And what part did you take?" said he, eagerly. + +"Oh," she replied, laughing carelessly, "I never do things by halves--so +I defended you through thick and thin." + +"Excellent girl," cried he, enthusiastically, taking her hand, and +pressing it warmly, "how can I ever thank you enough for this kindness?" + +"_Prenez garde_," said she, "gossippers are abroad, and there, I +declare, is Miss Lovelace's youngest sister going for her music +lesson--all Bath will say we are flirting." + +"You know how to contradict such scandal by a word," said he; "but that +word, for my sake, you will not speak." + +Lucy did not quite understand this last speech; but she did not like to +say so, and, therefore, murmured a rapid "Yes." + +A slight pause followed; and then he resumed the conversation with such +a sudden flow of spirits, that Lucy very soon forgot everything in the +pleasure of listening to him, and even suffered him to lengthen the walk +by taking a longer route. At the entrance to Sydney Place, he took leave +of her, and she returned home, thinking over everything he had said. +They had only talked on general topics after all; but then he spoke with +a deference to her opinion which was very pleasing. She was in very good +humour with herself, and resolved that, after leaving Miss Foster to +cool for a week or so, she would call and make up the quarrel in the +most generous manner she could. Satisfying her conscience with this, she +entered the house, and hastily taking off her bonnet, seated herself, +with the rest, at the breakfast-table, in good spirits and with a fresh +color, contenting herself with a very laconic description of her morning +walk. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + The foe, the foe is on thy track, + Patient, certain, and avenging; + Day by day, solemnly, and silently, followeth the fearful past, + His step is lame, but sure. + + +It was nearly eleven o'clock before the family assembled to breakfast, +and Mr. Villars had already retired to his study, leaving the +morning-room to its listless occupants. Maria, being the most active of +the family, generally presided at breakfast and tea, and kept alive the +yawning faculties of the party. On this occasion, she was busily, and +relentlessly rallying Caroline on the last night's _tête-à -tête_, when +Hargrave himself entered. He seemed entirely to have lost the gaiety of +the evening before, and to have assumed the gravity of a judge. To Mrs. +Villars' enquiries of whether he had slept well, he answered +courteously, but gravely; and Caroline afterwards observed to Selina, +that the dear creature was quite different when alone with her, and +Selina, in return, lispingly suggested, that he might be shy before +strangers. He did not, however, justify this remark by any of the little +awkwardnesses which so often accompany that feeling. On the contrary, he +seemed rather to seek the indulgence of one who is secure of favor, +however small the pains he may take to acquire it. Nor was he mistaken. +They were prepared to admire him, and his variable humours only gave him +an additional charm in their eyes. + +"What time do you receive your letters?" he enquired of Caroline. + +"About this time," she replied; "are you expecting any? for, if so, you +will not have very long to wait?" + +"Indeed," he replied, not noticing her question. + +At this moment the peculiar double knock of the post-man began to be +heard uncertainly, then louder and louder, as, coming round the street, +he stopped at their door. + +"Here he is," exclaimed Lucy; "I wonder if there is a letter from +Mabel." + +Two were brought; one for Mrs. Villars, and the other for her guest. +They were both written by Mr. Ware; the one addressed to Mrs. Villars, +contained a brief, but touching account of the fire, the illness of her +sister, and her removal to Aston Manor; concluding with poor Amy's +death. + +Mrs. Villars slowly read the letter aloud, but when she reached the last +few lines, which spoke of her niece's death, a loud shriek burst from +Lucy, as she rose and flew to her own room. Hargrave followed her to the +door with a deeper interest than he had before displayed, but she had +quickly vanished, and he returned to his seat. + +"She has been staying with them," said Mrs. Villars, in explanation; +"and the dear girl has so much feeling--but, colonel, only think of my +sister being at Aston Manor; but, perhaps, I ought not to have told you, +as I suppose the servants make free with the place in your absence." + +"Your sister is quite welcome to any hospitality my house can afford +her; and, perhaps, you will be kind enough to assure her on that point, +if she has any doubt. I will, myself, write to my housekeeper, and +request her to see to Mrs. Lesly's comfort." + +"You seem to take the news of your lost houses with admirable coolness," +said Caroline. + +"You mistake me, Miss Villars," he replied; a momentary fire lighting up +his eye, which made her shrink; "I am not indifferent to the death of +our poor cousin--the rest can be repaired--but I take it with apparent +coolness, because this is not the first time that these distressing +events have been communicated to me." + +"How?" exclaimed every one; "and why did you not tell us?" + +"Bad news travels quickly," returned Hargrave, evasively; "and it is +hardly likely that I should long be kept in ignorance of such a serious +accident." + +So saying, he opened his own letter, and read it with deep attention, +and emotion; a little to the surprise of the ladies, who had already +entered upon a discussion on the prettiest mourning dresses which the +fashion afforded. His better feelings alarmed, he scarcely knew why, by +the frivolity with which the news had been received, he retired to his +own room, and taking up his writing materials, he wrote much as +follows:-- + + MY DEAR SIR, + + "I regret that I cannot at once obey your summons to Aston; partly, + because I think it would be a more delicate kindness to Mrs. Lesly + and her daughter, to leave them in possession of my house, under + their present affliction, rather than intrude myself upon their + attention, just now; at the same time, if I came to you, they might + think they were putting me to inconvenience. But we shall soon + meet, my dear sir, I trust; when, from your accustomed kindness, I + may obtain forgiveness for the past; now, I do not feel worthy even + to reply to the praise you so lavishly bestow upon me. + + "In the meanwhile, my poor tenants, of whom you speak so warmly, + shall not be forgotten. I will write by this post, to a young + friend of mine, an architect; who, if able, shall go down to Aston + immediately, with powers to construct a sufficient number of + commodious tiled cottages--at the same time, I shall instruct him, + that any wish, or suggestion you may be kind enough to make, about + any part of the village, shall be strictly attended to. + + "With my best compliments to Miss Ware, and the hope of meeting ere + long, I am, + + "My dear sir, + "Your attached pupil, + "HARRY HARGRAVE." + +This letter was written with great rapidity, and having sealed and +directed it, he lounged back to the morning room. The recent events, of +course, formed the topic of conversation; but to all, but Lucy, Amy had +scarcely been known, more than by name; and she had retired to her room +in an agony of remorse, for her feelings, though seldom deep, were +impetuous, and easily moved by circumstances. She remembered Clair's +entreaty, that she would not go to the ball, with tenfold bitterness, as +she now reflected that, at the moment when she had been rejoicing in +unbounded spirits, Mabel had been keeping the sad death-watch by the +corpse of her sister. Again, and again she reproached herself as her +murderess, flung aside the tinselled dress which had rendered her the +ornament of the ball-room, and turned almost indignantly upon Maria, +when she attempted to comfort her. + +Her sisters, little understanding the nature of her feelings, and +wearied with her self-reproaches, soon agreed that it would be better +to leave her alone till she should recover herself; but Lucy, who +appeared to have little pleasure in their comfort, no sooner found +herself alone, than she felt unkindly neglected, and compared them +bitterly with Mabel, whose untiring patience had so often borne with her +weakness. + +In the afternoon, when exhausted by grief, and wholly subdued, she sat +crouching over the fire in their little dressing-room, Maria entered +with bustling pleasure. + +"Oh, Lucy," said she, "do dry your tears, and look bewitching--for who +do you think is down stairs--no other than your charming partner of last +night, Mr. Beauclerc, who is making himself so agreeable, listening to +mamma's touching account of your grief--so that you need not mind his +seeing that you have been crying." + +"Thank you," said Lucy, without raising her head; "but I cannot come +down to-day." + +"Oh, nonsense, Lucy--think how disappointed he will be--he may never +come again." + +"I cannot help it," said Lucy; "excuse me in any way you like--I cannot +and will not come--and you will only tease me by asking me." + +"Well, I am sure I would never stay up-stairs when a beau of mine was +down." + +"You do not know what you would do, if you had been as wicked as I have +been." + +"Come, come," said Maria, "we all are wicked, I dare say; but I would +never fret myself to death about it; but I suppose I must go," she said, +seeing Lucy resume her crouching attitude; and leaving the room, she +went to tell her mother, who, though much disappointed, was forced to +make Lucy's grief as becoming and touching as possible, in the eyes of +the stranger, though she afterwards expressed herself more candidly, +saying--"She had no patience with such fits of the heroics, and trusted +her sisters would laugh her out of them." + +Hargrave listened with great interest to the account of Lucy's share in +the accident by which Amy had first suffered, which he gleaned from +Caroline; and when, late in the evening, she appeared in the +drawing-room, her eyes swollen with weeping, and her cheeks pale and +discolored, he met her with a kind look, which her most sparkling +moments, perhaps, would not have excited. He gave her the most +comfortable seat by the fire, for which she tried to thank him, but her +voice failed her, and seating herself, in silence, she rested her tired +and aching head upon her hand. + +"You have been staying with Mrs. Lesly, I find," he said, knowing that +it would be of little purpose to try to turn her thoughts from the +subject that pained her. + +"Yes," was the faint reply, followed by a deep sigh. + +"Really, Lucy," said Caroline, a little sharply, "you should not give +way so, it will not mend matters now." + +Lucy had not temper for the "soft answer," and was too spiritless to +retort an angry one. + +"I think," said Hargrave, "you must have met a fellow-voyager of mine, a +Captain Clair--he said he was going to stay with his uncle at Aston." + +"Yes," said Lucy, despairingly, "I did meet him; and he said he knew +you." + +"How did you like him?" he pursued, anxious to make her speak. + +"Oh, pretty well," she said, carelessly; but a burning blush kindled +brighter and deeper on her pale cheek, as his penetrating eye watched +for her reply. + +She moved impatiently beneath his glance; but she felt that it was not +withdrawn, and painfully conscious of her increasing color, she rose +abruptly, and turning on him, for a moment, like the wearied stag at +bay, she looked angrily at him, and then hastened from the room. + +Still, however, as she once more retreated to her chamber, and shut the +door violently behind her, that glance seemed to follow her, not simply +inquisitive, but compassionately answering her own angry expression, as +if deprecating its violence. + +"He must know something about me," she thought. "Could Clair have spoken +of her to him, and in the same terms, which she had overheard him use to +his uncle, accompanied, perhaps, by ridicule. Yes," thought she, +actually throwing herself upon the floor in the vehemence of her +passion, "he sees me with Clair's eyes--if he pities, he despises me, as +the girl who was only used as the cloak to more honorable attentions to +Mabel. I cannot endure this--anything but to be both neglected and +despised. There is one, at least," she added, to herself, proudly, "who +appreciates me--but this time I will keep my own counsel." She rose, and +looked at the glass--but it now only told her that the boasted beauty of +the night before had faded before her tears. "I will weep no more," she +said, angrily, brushing the heavy drops from her cheeks, "I will weep no +more--but, I fear my heart will become hard indeed." + +A passionate burst of tears again interrupted her resolutions, and she +turned from the disappointing mirror, which had, only a few hours +before, reflected a form of airy liveliness, which had even astonished +herself. + +Of one thing, however, she was resolved; to avoid, as much as possible, +the offensive pity with which she imagined Hargrave regarded her; and +this resolution was so well kept that she always, after that night, +avoided him with studious shyness. + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + + What sadder sight can angels view, + Than self deceiving tears, + Pour'd idly over some dark page, + Of earlier life, though pride or rage, + The record of to-day engage, + A woe for future years. + + CHRISTIAN YEAR. + + +Colonel Hargrave rapidly domesticated himself in Sydney Place, and very +soon placed himself on terms of intimacy with the Villars family. Still +nothing occurred which seemed to bring Caroline nearer her object, and +though for some weeks her temper remained unruffled in his presence, +nothing betrayed any thing like admiration on his part; nothing could +warm into affection the every-day friendship which had been established +between them, or induce him to take advantage of his popularity, by +choosing a mistress for Aston Manor. + +Mrs. Villars was too ready to interpose her powers of contrivance, and +took every opportunity of throwing them together; in public, she often +succeeded, but in their private circle he was more than a match for all +her address, for when the manners of the perfect gentleman failed to +secure him from any well-laid scheme to entrap his admiration, he was +ready to assume those of the bear. + +One great difficulty consisted in dragging him to the balls and evening +parties, which began to succeed each other in rapid succession; and +sometimes when they had wholly reckoned on his company, he would be +found in his morning coat, busily employed in writing letters, which no +coaxing could induce him to leave. At these times Caroline would often +plead a head-ache, and remain at home, but to very little purpose, as +he seemed to believe the excuse, and, probably supposing quiet the best +restorative, he would gather up his books, and retire to his own room. + +A woman's heart, when regulated by no higher principle than that of its +own native impulses, is often piqued into love by the very means which +should have restrained it, and Caroline's had been left to the +government of vanity and coquetry, habits which insensibly corrode the +innate modesty of the female mind. Hargrave's failings, therefore, +excited more affection than his virtues--for the necessity of watching +his humours, and of courting rather than receiving his attentions, +insensibly interested her, and though her feeling was composed of +component parts of vanity, self-love, avarice, and, ambition, it could +scarcely be affirmed that it did not contain a few grains of genuine +affection. She had indeed merely expected some broken down nabob, who +would have formed an easy conquest, and she was therefore agreeably +surprised by Hargrave's manner and appearance, for his manly bearing +and easy air, compensated for any injury an Indian sun might have given +his complexion, and called forth the praise of all Caroline's fair +friends. Thus, stimulated by opposition, she left no art untried to win +him, and watched his movements with secret and constant jealousy; while +her mother, with the foolish fondness, which had grown almost to fear of +her beautiful daughter, encouraged her to hope, by repeating and +magnifying, sometimes even inventing, speeches, which seemed to betray +more than Hargrave openly professed. + +Meanwhile, he evaded these manoeuvres, and placed himself on terms of +equal civility with all the sisters, by whom he found even his weakest +foibles caressed. Lucy, alone, resisted his fascinations, and long after +every shadow of her grief had disappeared, continued to avoid him, and +never mentioned, before him, the name of her new admirer, whom she now +frequently met, either at the public balls, or the morning concerts in +the Pump room, the fashionable resort of the sick, who drank its +waters, the musical, or the idle. + +Mr. Beauclerc considered himself a judge of music, and might frequently +be seen listening to the performance with a scientific air. He seldom +failed to join the Villars party, and engage Lucy in conversation, to +her unfeigned satisfaction. She could not fail to perceive that there +was one subject which dwelt in his thoughts, though seldom more than +dimly hinted at, which gave an air of sadness to his mind. + +What this might be, Lucy knew not, though vanity echoed a ready answer, +and, whenever he spoke of his own loneliness or unhappiness, she evaded +the subject with a coquetry sufficiently skilful to check his +confidence, and, though it sometimes sent him away in an ill humour, he +invariably returned, in a short while, and she flattered herself that +each little exertion of her power only riveted his chains more surely. + +Several weeks had thus passed when, one morning, Mrs. Villars received +a letter from Mr. Ware, begging her immediate presence at Aston, as the +symptoms of her sister's illness had assumed a more dangerous character, +and he feared that the utmost haste would be required to enable her to +reach Aston in time to see her alive. Estranged as Mrs. Villars had been +from her sister, she yet loved her, as warmly as her selfish nature +would allow--and she hastened to her husband's study, to make +preparations for her immediate journey; she would not, however, hear of +his offer to accompany her, lest Colonel Hargrave might take the alarm, +and leave them--she, therefore, only begged him to keep less to his +study, at least, in the evenings. Mr. Villars replied, that his own +sense of delicacy might be relied on; which made her fear that he would +give them too much of his company; but she had little time to argue, +for, before her hasty preparations were completed, the post-chaise, +which had been ordered, was at the door. + +As she was stepping in, Colonel Hargrave offered to accompany her for a +few stages, saying that he had a friend in the direction she was going, +whom he was anxious to visit. + +"I am going to a sad scene," said Mrs. Villars, when they had travelled +for a few miles, "and, besides the loss of my sister, my feelings will +be agonised, I know, for she leaves a daughter to mourn her loss, +homeless and unprotected." + +"Yes," said Hargrave; "but your presence will be some comfort to her." + +"I quite dread the meeting," continued Mrs. Villars. "Did you read Mr. +Ware's letter? I fear there is no hope." + +"None, indeed, I fear," replied Hargrave, looking out to urge the +post-boy to greater speed. "What is to become of Miss Lesly?" he +presently asked, "she has, I suppose, something to depend upon." + +Mrs. Villars slightly coloured, and couched hastily, when she perceived +her change of countenance observed. + +"I do not think they were very good managers, to tell you the truth," +she said; "and they had not much to save from." + +"What will become of her then?" he repeated, with sudden animation. + +"I can scarcely tell what may happen eventually," replied Mrs. Villars; +"but should my poor sister die, I mean to bring my niece back with me, +for the present, at least. She is a good-looking girl, and I may be able +to get her settled." + +"Settled!" repeated Hargrave, mechanically, and relapsed into silence. + +Soon afterwards, a turn in the road brought in sight some tall, +old-fashioned gates, opening on an avenue of dark trees, through which +nothing could be discerned, but the gable ends of a more distant +mansion. Here Hargrave alighted, and bidding her good-bye, in a tone of +sadness, which seemed the highest compliment to her present affliction, +entered the old gateway, and stood there, till Mrs. Villars was beyond +his sight. + +Musingly she continued her journey, and gladly would she have had his +further companionship, to screen her from the thoughts which were now +rapidly gaining entrance into her mind. + +It was one of those dark days, when the shadows seem to fall long before +the unseen sun has set; and, as the horses speeded along, she gathered +the folds of her cloak closer around her, and endeavoured to suppress +the shudder, which something beyond the cold biting air of a dull +easterly wind made to pass over her frame. Night had already closed, +dark, dismal, and cold, before she reached Aston. As they entered the +village, she leaned from the window, and expressed her desire to stop at +the inn, she remembered; but a further glance at the ruined village, +faintly shewn by the light of the carriage-lamps, as she rattled through +it, told her of nothing but scattered timbers and blackened walls, and +thus obliged her to change her order, and drive, at once, to Aston +Manor. + +As the chaise rolled lightly up the smooth gravelled avenue to the +Manor, Mrs. Villars endeavoured to calm her trembling agitation, with +the hope that all would yet be well; but the low, hurried whispers, in +the dimly lighted hall, that greeted her arrival, unnerved her, and, +dispensing with the assistance, she usually so rigorously exacted from +her inferiors, she hurried from the chaise, and entered the hall, +exclaiming-- + +"Can it be possible? am I too late?" + +"Yes, indeed, ma'am," replied the housekeeper, now advancing; "it is too +true. We closed her eyes but late last night." + +Mrs. Villars hid her face in the sables which enveloped her, and sobbed +convulsively; then, flinging down her purse, she begged her to dismiss +the chaise, saying, she was Mrs. Lesly's sister, and must see her +immediately. + +"Let me beg you, ma'am," said Mrs. Hawkins, respectfully, "to compose +yourself--it will be too much for you to-night." + +"No, no, no," cried Mrs. Villars, as warm, repentant tears streamed +rapidly down her face; "let me see her now--my poor, poor sister." + +Mrs. Hawkins sadly led the way up the marble staircase, and across the +gallery, to a door which she noiselessly opened, as if she feared to +disturb the slumbers of the dead. The room was fully lighted by wax +tapers--but the bed was partially concealed by the many folds of its +crimson curtains. + +An old woman was sitting by the fire, who rose on Mrs. Villars's +entrance--and, at the same moment, glanced to the window, where Mabel +was seated, gazing out upon the star-light stillness of the night, as if +communing with her own spirit. She rose on perceiving them, and gliding +from the recess, advanced rapidly and noiselessly to meet her aunt; +placing both her hands on hers, she attempted to speak, but the words +died between her half parted lips, and a quiet burst of tears succeeded +the effort. + +Mrs. Villars caught her in her arms, sobbing violently, with the excess +of her emotion. She had seldom been with the dying, and did not remember +having ever been in actual contact with death itself, and it was with an +internal shrinking, that, at length, releasing the poor girl from her +arms, she advanced to gaze on the face of her sister. How calm and +placid seemed the sleep of the dead, in that still chamber--but, though +sweetly tranquil was the countenance once so dear, it bore the +unmistakable, terrible touch of death; and Mrs. Villars wrung her hands, +and turned away; an icy coldness seemed taking possession of her senses, +and terror prevented her stooping to touch the cold lips which never +more would reproach her with their confiding words. + +Mrs. Hawkins soon kindly put an end to this trying scene, by leading her +from the room; there was enough in the bereavement itself to touch her +sympathy, without her being aware of the pangs of awakening conscience, +which added bitterness to a grief seemingly so natural. + +How miserable those days of mourning seemed to the heartless woman--as +hour slowly dragged after hour in that silent house. There were no +exciting trifles to wear away the time--nothing but the endless black +crape with which she tried to feel interested, though her senses +sickened at the mournful tales it told. There, no company came to banish +thought--thought of solemn things that she was little prepared to +contemplate--she was alone with Mabel, and the dead. + +Again, and again, she condemned herself for the deceptions she had +practised, and endeavoured to appease her self-accusations with ideas of +the most lavish generosity to Mabel--but justice--alas, that she felt +she had placed it almost beyond her power to render her. She now owed +her six hundred pounds, and well she knew, that, however frivolously she +had spent, however small a part of her extravagances it had proved--this +sum was almost the entire support her sister had saved for her orphan +daughter; which, though little calculated to afford her maintenance as +a gentle-woman, might, in talented hands, be the commencement of a +respectable independence; or, at all events, save her, if dependent, +from many minor, but bitter personal necessities which wound the +delicate mind so sorely. Well she knew this--but she knew, also, that +she never would have the courage, either to limit her own personal +expenses, or to ask her husband for the money. Mabel must be repaid by +the most lavish kindness, and by all the comforts of a home. She could +not know of the debt, therefore would not feel her loss, and if, by a +timely display of her beauty, and her painful bereavements, she could +marry her well--she might then deem the debt repaid. All this she +endeavoured to persuade herself; but, as she wandered from room to room +in the twilight, which their closed windows afforded, something uneasy +oppressed her, which forced her to repeat, again and again, the same +line of consolation. It was then, with a sense of relief, that she saw +the day for her sister's funeral draw near, and she watched the dark +procession from the house, winding its way to the little church, with +grief, indeed, but with grief lightened of its heaviest sense of +oppression. With the greatest attention she watched over Mabel, whose +strength had entirely given way, when the last sad scene, the last +parting was over--and, for hours, seemed to have forgotten all that was +selfish in her nature to minister to her comfort. + +On the following morning, perceiving that she was sufficiently calm to +listen to her, she begged her to enter on an explanation of her affairs; +expressing herself anxious to know if she had thought of any plans for +the future. + +"No, dear aunt," was Mabel's reply; "but I must soon think of them." + +"What money have you left?" enquired Mrs. Villars. + +"In the funds only one hundred pounds, I believe," replied Mabel, "for +the physicians I procured from London were so expensive in their +fees--but the rest you know--" + +"Yes, yes," interrupted Mrs. Villars, too troubled, and too uncertain as +to her future conduct to commit herself, by answering what she +apprehended to be an allusion to her debt, "but I was going to ask, did +you save anything from the fire?" + +"Yes, some plate, a little more than a hundred pounds worth, I +think--Captain Clair kindly secured it." + +"Ah," said Mrs. Villars, self awaking, "I remember it is just the same +pattern as mine; if you like I will have it properly valued, and pay you +for it--people may think if they like, that your poor mother left it to +me." + +"Thank you," returned Mabel, who had perceived her aunt's hesitation +with regard to the money, and therefore was little willing to increase +the debt; "but I do not think I shall dispose of it yet, if at all." + +"But then I cannot make people believe it was left me?" + +"There will be no necessity; for what I am not ashamed of doing I can +bear to have known; and it is only for my sake that you can have any +scruple." + +"Oh, dear, no, of course not," returned her aunt, not the better pleased +to find Mabel so unlike her mother in worldly matters. "Well, then, if +you do not like the plate turned into money, the hundred pounds will +keep you in dress for two years, and by that time I trust you will be, +better provided for, by a respectable marriage." + +Mrs. Villars had been too accustomed to speak of marriage, in this kind +of jobbing style, to her daughters, to be fully alive to the blush of +exquisite pain, which, for an instant, brightened the pale cheek of her +companion. Something, however, in that blush, recalled a resemblance she +only rarely shewed to her mother, and Mrs. Villars felt again all the +pangs of concealed shame. Hastening then to relieve herself, she entered +more eagerly on the real subject of her conversation, and at once +pressed her, with affectionate warmth, to accept the protection of her +home, to find in her a second mother, to be one with her daughters, +sharer in all their privileges, and pleasures, and sisterly love. + +Mabel started, and, as she listened to the generous proposal her aunt so +warmly advocated, she could not help reproaching herself, for ever +having regarded her as worldly minded. In vain she gently urged the +inconvenience this arrangement might possibly bring; Mrs. Villars would +hear nothing of it, and when Mabel still hesitated, she folded her in +her arms and asked her piteously and entreatingly, while tears choked +her utterance, if she would deny her the privilege of atoning to her +lost sister for all the neglect, for which she now so bitterly +reproached herself. + +Mabel could say nothing, nor did she wish to urge anything more, for +sweetly did those words sound to her ears, "home and sisters," kind +sisters who would wile away her sorrow, and re-awaken her interest in +life--home where her tried spirit might find refreshment and repose. +She suffered her head to sink upon the bosom to which she was so warmly +prest, and murmured forth an answer of affection and gratitude. + +Shortly afterwards Mr. Ware was announced, and to him her new plans were +immediately confided by Mabel. He had believed Mrs. Villars a +worldly-minded woman, and was, therefore, much pleased when he +perceived, by the tone of both, that the arrangement had been so +cordially proposed. + +"One alteration I must," said he, "beg in my favour: Mabel is so justly +dear to us all, that to part with her before even attempting to console +her grief, is more than I could well bear. You must indeed, madam, spare +her to us at the rectory for a little while." + +"Willingly, my dear sir," replied Mrs. Villars, with that tone of manner +which often rendered her popular, "and we can manage it in this way--I +have a friend at Cheltenham, who has been long pressing me to visit her, +I will go and see her now, it will do me good after this sad +trial--and, provided Mabel promises to obey my summons, I will leave her +to join me on the road. She is now my ward, by her own consent," she +added, smiling kindly at her. + +This proposal was eagerly accepted by Mr. Ware, who dreaded losing +Mabel, and clung to any pretext for keeping her. + +"I must go and tell my sister that this dear child will soon be with +us," said he, rising to take his leave, "and you, madam, suffer me to +offer an old man's blessing for your kindness to this poor orphan," he +said, laying his hand on Mabel's head, "I would have gladly taken her to +my heart and home, to be the blessing there she has long been, but this +selfish wish would deprive her of the healthy companionship of those who +will be her sisters, and kindly cheer her young life, which has been +bowed with many sorrows. I need not ask you to deal kindly with her for +you have done that already. I only say, may an old man's blessing be +upon you and yours, as you have dealt kindly by this poor lamb." + +Mrs. Villars turned aside her head to conceal her rising emotion, and +Mabel's face was bathed in tears, as Mr. Ware, with glistening eyes and +trembling steps, hurried from the room to repress the feelings which had +become too strong for utterance. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + + All have their tasks and trials; thine are hard, + But short the time, and glorious the reward, + Thy patient spirit to thy duties give, + Regard the dead, but to the living live. + + CRABBE. + + +It was with pleasure--melancholy, indeed, but still most sincere--that +Mabel was welcomed at the rectory. Mr. Ware and his sister emulated each +other, in endeavours to cheer her, before her introduction to a gayer +scene, which they knew awaited her in Bath. Their party had been +increased by the arrival of Mr. Clifford, the young architect, mentioned +by Colonel Hargrave, who had easily been induced to accept a room in +the pleasant rectory; so that, together with Rogers, the bailiff, whose +sick room required every attention, Mr. Ware was busy enough. Mr. +Clifford brought with him different plans for the improvement of the +estate, and the re-building of the village, on a different scale; and +the greater part of the evening was generally occupied in talking these +over, or drawing fresh ones. In this occupation Mr. Ware would gladly +have interested Mabel; but she was scarcely equal to the exertion, and +he well knew he could expect nothing, reasonably, beyond the unmurmuring +resignation, which characterised her grief, and the transient, tearful +interest she sometimes displayed in what they were doing. The comfort +and happiness of her favorite village never could be unheeded by her; +but it required some relaxation of her over taxed nervous system before +she could again become the self-forgetful, cheerful companion she had +been. This indulgence was freely granted her--and her affectionate heart +soon warmed to the watchful love which surrounded her, as the drooping +flowers turn to the warm beams of the returning sun. + +"How often have I had reason to be grateful to you, dear sir?" she said, +one morning, as she passed her hand through Mr. Ware's arm, to accompany +him in his walk round the garden. It was one of those days, which, in +England, so often surprise us in the midst of winter, with their balmy +air and spring-like feeling. "And now more than ever," she continued, +"for supporting me at this sad season. You can little know how very, +very grateful I am for this thoughtful kindness." + +"My dear child," returned Mr. Ware, soothingly, "it must be very easy to +accept the kindness which you have never forgotten to afford to others." + +"Always kind," said Mabel, with a sigh, "how shall I bear to part from +you?" + +"Or I from you, dear Mabel; often have you secured me from the regrets, +which, in a life of such seclusion as we have past here, might have +invaded my quiet. You have afforded me that society which I could not +otherwise have secured, and willingly would I have kept you still; but I +feel that Aston would, at least for the present, be full of too many +regrets for you to make me urge it. Besides, our natural relations have +a claim upon us, and, with yours, you will probably find a safe and +happy home. My Mabel will not forget that these have a claim upon her, +and that she may be called to new duties amongst them." + +"And new trials," said Mabel, sadly, "I shall meet _him_." + +"Yes, for a while--only a little while; I need not say anything on that +subject, your heart will best dictate your conduct--only be firm, and +remember always, if annoyances prevail elsewhere, here is your home." + +"Not so--I trust he will soon be here--he ought to be here--and, oh, how +gladly would I see that. Do you not think his strange appearance on that +awful night--the delicacy he has since shewn--Mr. Clifford's coming--do +you not think all this looks well?" + +Mr. Ware looked earnestly and painfully at her; she seemed immediately +to understand that look, for turning from him, she wrung her hands +together bitterly. + +"Oh, why," she exclaimed, "can I never indulge my best hopes, without +the appearance of selfishness--must they always be so inseparable; but +you, at least, understand me," she added, turning her beautiful face +full upon him with a look of supplication. + +"Yes, indeed, I do," he replied, "only I began to fear--I do understand +you, my noble-hearted girl--trust me, I do." + +But Mabel only turned aside her head to weep, and though he tried to +renew the subject, she skilfully evaded it, and when that pained him, +she turned and soothed him with the eager caress of childlike affection. + +At this moment, Clair was seen walking pensively up and down the walk, +at some little distance, and, as Mr. Ware was called away, Mabel +suffered him to go in alone, and advanced timidly towards his nephew; +she gained upon him before he was fully aware of her presence, and +joining him, she walked by his side, for a few minutes, in silence. He +was moodily musing, and she seemed, for a time, watchful how best to +interrupt him. She had never yet alluded to his letter, and spite of the +afflicting scenes which had so lately engaged her attention, he felt +slightly annoyed as well as disappointed--so little, however, did he +acknowledge such a feeling, even to himself, that he was a little +startled when she said, softly and timidly-- + +"You are offended with me." + +"Offended, Miss Lesly?" + +"Yes, and justly so--but if you could but know how many times I have +tried to speak to you without having the courage to do so, you would +forgive me." + +Clair's eye kindled with sudden pleasure, but she saw the look, and +hastened to temper it. + +"You told me that you knew something of my early history." + +"Yes, Miss Lesly," he said, puzzled at her manner, and one moment +appearing ready to sink back into his dejection, the next, to seize her +hand--and give way to something more than joy. + +"You must know, then," she continued, fixing her eyes on the ground; +"that the heart which has been once given away, is no longer capable of +appreciating you." + +"Unless," said Clair, eagerly. + +"Ah, but with me, there is no unless," said Mabel; "do not ask me to +unveil the painful recesses of a mind inured, but not insensible to +sorrow; and do not, oh, do not, like me, prepare for yourself that +loneliness of heart which I must carry with me always. I dare not trifle +with a feeling whose intensity I know too well; but, yet, I hope, so +earnestly do I hope, that you have mistaken yourself, and, that pity for +my sorrows, and the unhappy share you had in them, have led you to +think of me as you have done, and that these feelings may be easily +overcome. I feel privileged to speak to you," she said, raising her eyes +timidly, "because we are both unhappy." + +"Ah, Miss Lesly, you little know me; I would give all my affection, +even, for the pleasure of your society--even if you would but tolerate +me for a while--my devotion might--." + +"Oh, no," said Mabel, earnestly, and unhesitatingly; "do not speak like +that again. I would not enter on such holy duties with such feelings +only; and, even if I did, cruelly should I be taking advantage of your +confidence. I came only to ask you to think of me no more--to forgive +me, if possible, and--." + +"And," returned Clair; "can you forgive me for my former trifling." + +"Not quite, for had you not trifled, I might have spared you some pain +now. But you do forgive me," she said, extending her hand, and their +eyes met for the first time. + +"I do, I do; if I have anything to forgive," said Clair, turning his +pale face aside, as he pressed her hand. + +Mabel bowed gently over it, then withdrawing it from his grasp, glided +from him, and re-entered the house. + +There was one other duty to be performed before she left Aston, which +tried her courage as much as any other; this was taking leave of her +mother's two old and faithful servants--but she knew that such a +parting, though so trying was one expected of her, and she would not +deny them the pleasure of seeing her, perhaps, for the last time. When, +however, the hour which she had appointed for their coming arrived, her +heart sank within her, and her spirits entirely failed, when she met +their familiar faces almost as sad as her own. + +"It is like losing the very light of my eyes to see you go away, Miss +Mabel," said old John. + +"You have served us long and well--and that thought will be very +cheering when I am gone," said Mabel, "but I want to know what you mean +to do--I want to think you are comfortable when I am away. Will you go +to service again?" + +"I do not think I could serve another master or mistress," said old +John, decidedly. "If so be you wanted a servant--" + +"Then," said Mabel, "you would be mine, of course; but that cannot be; +and I have been thinking, that if you had a garden of your own--a +nursery garden, I mean, you would be independent." + +"I was thinking of that myself, ma'am," said old John, with a pleased +expression at finding his wants divined--"and if--but I don't like to +say it--there, I can't," he said, walking to the window. + +"John was going to say, ma'am," interrupted Betsy, seeing that Mabel +looked puzzled, "that if it would not hurt your feelings, he should like +to keep on the old garden still--if he could have a cottage built where +our house stood--if, that is, you do not object." + +Mabel checked her rising emotion, and said, cheerfully. + +"How could I object to your keeping the dear old garden--how glad should +I be to think that it was an old friend, not a stranger, who lived +there." + +"Would you now, ma'am," said John, his face brightening; "I could keep +the old walks and the hot beds as they used to be--and 'twouldn't be +quite such a breaking up of old times--for I have lived there so long, +it seems like a home to me." + +"I should be very glad," said Mabel, "to think you were happy there, and +that something of what I loved so well remained still. I will speak to +Mr. Clifford, perhaps he may do what we ask--for he seems willing to +please everybody." + +"Thank ye, ma'am," said John, rubbing his head with an air of +consideration, as if he had something more to say. + +"And you, Betsy, what will you do?" + +"Why, that's the very thing," said John, as Betsy hesitated, in her +turn; "'praps you don't know, ma'am, that Jonathan Williams has courted +her for many years--but she didn't like to leave poor missis. Now, I was +thinking, if you approve, that, as I am getting old, I shall want some +one to help me, and as he's a clever man at a garden, I might as well +take him into employ or partnership, and so we might live +altogether--for," he added, with great emphasis; "I don't like to be put +out by strangers--and Betsy knows my ways." + +"That will be perfect," cried Mabel, with something of the gladness of +her old tone of voice, rising as she spoke; "and you must write to me +often, and tell me how this plan goes on;" she said, more hurriedly. "In +the mean while, to secure its success, I shall place twenty pounds, a +piece, for you, in Mr. Ware's hands; which you can draw upon, as you +want money, for furnishing your new house--and I hope you have laid up +something for yourselves, and so will be able to start with advantage. +You must let me get you your wedding gown, Betsy." + +So difficult is it for the uneducated to separate wealth from gentle +manners, and ladylike qualities, that the two faithful domestics +accepted her parting gift with gratitude and pleasure; but without the +reluctance which they would have felt, had they guessed the real nature +of her circumstances. They could not fancy that the mistress, whose +noble qualities had ever received their genuine respect, was really +almost moneyless, and dependent for the blessing of a home. Mabel was +not sorry to keep up the illusion, and tore herself from them before +they had time to enquire anything of her future plans. + +When she placed the money in Mr. Ware's hands, he remonstrated with her +on giving away a sum so large in proportion to with what she actually +possessed; but she replied cheerfully-- + +"So much of our comfort is in the hands of our servants, that if they +have served us well, we can scarcely reward them enough. The thought +that I have shewn them something of my gratitude for the past, will be +better to me than the money itself. The selfish reason that I have no +one to care for but myself, should at least have its advantages." + +Mr. Clifford was easily persuaded to grant Mabel's request, that, upon +the site of her once happy home--one might be built for the old +servants; and he readily took the opportunity of interesting her by +making her choose and alter the plans for the new cottage, which they +agreed should be in the same style as the other, though, of course, a +real cottage. + +Mabel might soon, perhaps, have recovered the harmony of her spirits, +amongst those dear friends who were so studiously attentive in every +imaginable kindness, but she was not suffered to enjoy their society +very long--for her aunt was impatient to return to Bath, and wrote to +tell her at what stage upon the road they were to meet. + +She dared not delay--neither did she much wish to do so, when she +perceived Clair's unhappiness rather increased by time; and she, +therefore, felt it right to depart as soon as possible. But, in leaving +Aston, she began more and more to realise the true nature of her recent +loss; and when Mr. Ware drove her to the little town where she was to +meet the coach, he tried in vain to rouse her from the despondency into +which she had fallen. + +"My child," he said, as he took leave of his weeping charge; "you will +remember, though not yet, that your past life calls upon you for future +exertion." + +Mabel endeavoured to smile her thanks, and her promises, but the light +appeared in her eyes only to vanish again, put out by tears--yet, as the +coach rolled off, she leant forward, and kissed her hand with an air of +cheerfulness. Mr. Ware turned musingly away. As he drove home by +himself, the road seemed unusually long, and the large flakes of snow, +as they lazily fell through the freezing air, seemed even more cold and +comfortless than they usually do: he could not conceal from himself that +a gap had been made in his little circle, which he had no opportunity of +supplying; and that, with the loss of the Lesly family, he must part +with much that had tended to render his life happy. + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + + I grew up selfish, full of hopes and cares, + For my own welfare, unconcerned for theirs-- + + +With many different feelings, Mrs. Villars' return, with her niece, was +expected in Bath, by her family--jealousy is, indeed, "strong as death," +and uncertain and wayward in its effects--Caroline had, with unfeminine +obstinacy, determined on becoming mistress of Aston Manor and its owner; +and every object that came in her way, was regarded with dislike. She +had heard from Lucy, of Mabel's beauty and winning manners; and such +beauty, in distress, she fancied more dangerous still. What her mother +could be thinking of to bring her to Bath she could not imagine! but it +was in vain for her to write an angry appeal: the answer was decisive. +"Mabel must come," the letter said, "and," added Mrs. Villars, "my Cary +must make preparation for her proper accommodation; but should you +object to our giving up the spare room to her, which certainly would be +a sacrifice, you must fit her up a room somewhere, as well as you +can--she must not be particular; still, as she is dependent on us, I +should not like to stint my favors exactly, though, perhaps, she ought +to take rather a more humble footing than my own dear girls." Caroline +well understood this letter, and acted accordingly. She knew that her +mother's generous fit was passing, and that she was preparing to be more +worldly wise. + +On the evening of Mrs. Villars' expected return, Hargrave was sitting in +his study, lost in something very like a reverie, when he was roused by +a low tap at his door. Hastily taking up his pen, to assume the +appearance of occupation, he gave the customary answer of "Come in," +and Caroline entered. + +"Henry," said she, with a persuasive smile, "you must come and join our +party in the drawing-room. We have a beautiful fire, and everything +comfortable--so do come." + +"Why to-night particularly?" + +"Because we are all waiting to see mamma, and our wonderful cousin, and +we want you to amuse the time away." + +"Very well," said Hargrave, rising, and slowly closing his desk--putting +aside a private paper or two from the table, which was covered with +maps, architectural plans, ground measurements, and books. + +"Really," pursued Caroline, glancing round the room, "you study too +much. How very pale you look--lock up this dry room, and give me the +key, you shall have it again in a day or two." + +"Dry," repeated Hargrave, with a smile, taking up one paper after +another, as if with peculiar affection, "dry--ah, that reminds me I +have a question to ask your papa on this subject." + +"Now, you tease, you shall not go to that tiresome study to-night; we +want you, and you must come with me." + +So saying, she passed her hand playfully through his arm, and compelled +him to accompany her to the drawing-room. + +The girls were all seated round a cheerful fire; but, there were two +chairs left vacant, side by side. Hargrave, however, evaded this +manoeuvre by flinging himself, with all the coolness of accustomed +indulgence, at full length upon the sofa, with his head supported by his +two hands, and his eyes shut, as if in full preparation for a nap. + +"Provoking creature," cried Caroline, "I did not bring you here to go to +sleep." + +"Pray do not let me disturb you," he replied, yawning; "I am listening." + +"Now, Harry, you know that it is only because we all spoil you that you +give yourself such airs; but do not think going to sleep a good way to +preserve your popularity." + +"I am not conscious of any diminution in it," returned the imperturbable +Hargrave; "but here I am at your service," he added, slowly rising to a +sitting posture. + +One great source of amusement consisted in watching his caprices, and +reporting his humour, as it varied. + +"Are they not late?" he enquired, at length, when a carriage rolled down +the street, causing a momentary expectation, but stopped not till its +murmuring sound died in the distance, or was hushed by the wind, as it +rushed round the corners of the streets. + +"It is a long cross road, I think," said Caroline, "but I hope they will +be here soon, for I am tired of waiting." + +"How freezingly cold," said Hargrave. + +"Yes, indeed;" said Maria, "the water is frozen in the rooms up-stairs, +and there are long, horrid icicles hanging down the windows, and it is +snowing out of doors. I really cannot bear to cross the passages, and I +cannot think how people can be out to-night, when they may stay at +home." + +"I think," said Selina, "it is a great pity for any one to die in the +winter--just in the midst of the gay season. Only think, but for this +crape, we might be at Mrs. Trelawny's party this evening. It makes one's +heart ache to hear the carriages go by--ah, there is another, I declare. +Black is so unbecoming, too," said she, glancing at the tiny foot which +peeped out from the black folds of her dress. + +"Now I am sure," said Maria, "you are only asking for a compliment, when +you know nothing suits a fair complexion so well as black. Now I, with +my tawny skin, might complain, had I not long ago given up the attempt +to look fascinating, and depended more on my tongue than my face; but +still I do wish that this piece of perfection had retained possession of +her Cotswold air, and left us to ourselves. Mamma is a clever woman--as +if she had not girls enough to drag after her, and provide husbands +for." + +An angry cry of "shame" ran round the circle; but Maria, catching a half +smile from Hargrave, laughed merrily in reply. + +"Only think," she went on, "we must put on long faces for a fortnight, +at least, in sympathy for the death of an old lady, we did not care a +straw about; but, at least, I am no hypocrite, and that she will find--I +shall not pretend to admire perfections who look down on every one +else." + +"That I am sure she does not," said Lucy. "Ah, that's the thing, she is +better than ordinary perfections even--but here's papa." + +Mr. Villars here entered the room. + +"Oh, papa," cried Caroline, pettishly, "I wish you would not leave the +door open." + +Mr. Villars quietly shut it--but the request jarred upon his +feelings--there was something, too, in the arrangement of the chairs, +which did not offer any considerable inducement to him to remain. He +was sure to put a check upon conversation, usually of the most frivolous +kind, and, therefore, his presence was not often desired by his +daughters, though his mild, indulgent eye seemed often almost to entreat +the affection which was so coldly and grudgingly bestowed, while too +sensitive to command the attention which was his due. + +Solitude had become irksome to him, and he had now come to seek for some +one to share in a new idea, which had for some hours occupied his pen. + +He paused, for a moment, before the little circle--but no one rose to +offer him a seat. + +Hargrave's eyes were fixed upon the fire, seemingly forgetful of all +around him. Caroline was regarding him. She was never susceptible to any +interest in her father's proceedings, so that he did not attempt to gain +her attention; but, addressing Selina, who seemed the least amused of +the party--he said, smiling kindly, but timidly-- + +"I want a little advice--I have been trying all day to write a letter +to the _Times_, giving my views on the present system of education at +the Universities, showing how much time is wasted on the dead languages, +which might be given to philosophy and science." + +"Oh, really, papa," said Selina, with a half yawn to the subject, "I am +so ignorant--I am sure I cannot help you." + +"Oh, yes," he replied, gently; "you think less of yourself than you +need--I shall be glad of your opinion. Come--" + +"Oh, no, papa, I would much rather not." + +"My little Lucy will come then." + +"I would," she replied, "very gladly, only I am so anxious to see +mamma." + +"Come, Maria, then, I really cannot get on without a little +admiration--and I do not expect them for an hour or two." + +"I would if I understood anything about it," said Maria, "I dare say the +letter will do beautifully." + +"I will come, sir, if I may," cried Hargrave, starting up, on seeing +Mr. Villars leaving the room with a dejected air. + +But the hall bell stopped both of them. Lucy sprang to the door, but +suddenly stopped, and turned pale, and shrunk instinctively, remembering +the impossibility of her being a welcome object to Mabel. + +Mrs. Villars was now heard coming up-stairs, giving orders to the +servants, as she did so. Her voice became more distinct, as she +approached the room, and entered, followed by the dark, black figure of +her orphan niece. She presented her to her daughters in turn, who each +gave her a hand rather in curiosity than kindness. Lucy, unable to +remain longer inactive, advanced with the impulse of throwing her arms +round her neck, but feeling checked by the presence of her sisters, she +only kissed her with a shy timidity, which very little expressed the +real warmth of her welcome. + +"Welcome, my poor child," said the kind and fatherly voice of Mr. +Villars, to the silent girl, "you will find here, I hope, kind +companions, and a comfortable home." + +Mabel gently raised the heavy veil, which had completely shrouded her +face, and seemed almost to bow down her head, and, as she did so, +displayed a countenance, which the beautiful and haughty Caroline +regarded with triumph and satisfaction. Tears stained her colorless +cheeks, and grief and watching were deeply marked in her sunken eyes. +There was no affectation of suffering there; but, as she looked up in +reply to Mr. Villars, a light ray passed over her countenance, and at +once spoke the loveliness which no sorrow could darken. She tried to +speak, but her parted lips refused to utter expressions of feeling, +which her eloquent eyes had already conveyed. + +"You will now," said her aunt, pompously, "have an opportunity of +thanking Colonel Hargrave for the hospitality he has afforded you." + +But Colonel Hargrave was gone. No one had seen him leave the room; but +when his absence was perceived, Caroline felt a sensation of pleasure +she could not account for, and, in great, good humour, turned to assist +Mabel in relieving herself of the heavy cloak which encumbered her; she +then perceived that she was trembling with cold and agitation--and when +she begged leave to retire for the night, every one saw that there was +necessity for repose to soothe her spirits. + +Maria, whose good nature was, at times, greater than she would +acknowledge, almost forced her to swallow the wine she had declined. + +Mrs. Villars, taking a light, requested Mabel to follow her, with +stately kindness. + +The drawing-room they left was on the second floor, and yet she led her +up two flights of stairs, and then across a narrow passage, before she +stopped at the door of the room destined for her. + +"My house is so very crowded," Mrs. Villars said, apologetically, "that +I am obliged to put you up here; but it will be a little home to you, +and you must make yourself snug and comfortable. Oh, those naughty girls +have forgotten to put you a chest of drawers; but you must contrive for +a day or two, and I will see to it." + +Possibly she forgot; for she did not see to it. + +"It will do quite well for me, aunt, thank you," answered the low, +sweet-toned voice, which so often touched her better self; but when we +are deliberately acting with unkindness, it is not pleasant to have that +better self awakened, after the pains we have taken to lull it to sleep. + +Mrs. Villars hastily bade her good night, telling her to go to sleep, +and be well on the morrow, and returned to the drawing-room. There she +found her daughters busy in criticising the face and form of the new +comer. + +Caroline, vexed that Hargrave did not return, and seized with a sudden +desire to follow him, quietly left the room, and glided down stairs. + +With stealthy steps, she again sought the room, where she thought the +truant had taken refuge. The light that streamed from it into the +passage, shewed her that the door was open, and as she reached it, she +paused, for a moment, to take a view of its occupant before invading his +retirement. + +A large fire blazed up the chimney, and cast a flickering light round +the apartment, at times, bringing every object to view, and then leaving +it in fanciful shadow. Piles of books, as before, lay upon the table, on +which stood an unlighted lamp. Heedless of the many sources of +employment which were scattered around him, Hargrave was sitting, +leaning over the table. Caroline thought he slept, and meditated some +fanciful mode of waking him; but the moment her dress moved, he raised +his head, and the firelight which, while it left her own corner in +darkness, fell full upon him, shewed upon his countenance, the +unmistakable traces of grief and weakness. Her naturally quick +perception at once told her, that no time could be less favorable for +intrusion upon one so haughty, and, to all appearance, so impenetrable, +and drawing herself back into the shade, she lingered, but a moment, to +assure herself that he was again lost in his solitary musing, and then +noiselessly gained her own room, and sat down to think over what she had +witnessed. + +Did he always indulge in such thoughts? and if so, over what past event +was he grieving? what loss which could not be repaired? + +The flattering answer, returned by her mirror, gave her hope that such +grief, if more than transitory, would still be of no long duration. + +What the heart wishes, it finds a thousand witnesses to substantiate. + + + + +CHAPTER XII. + + Oft in life's stillest shade reclining, + In desolation, unrepining, + Without a hope on earth to find, + A mirror in an answering mind. + Meek souls there are who little dream, + Their daily task an Angel's theme; + Or that the rod they take so calm, + Shall prove in Heaven a martyr's palm. + + CHRISTIAN YEAR. + + +The night was piercingly cold. + +Mabel sat down upon her travelling trunk, which had preceded her to her +room, and which, carelessly, had been left corded. There was no bell by +which she could summon assistance, and therefore, with trembling +fingers, she undid the tightly-knotted cord, and with some difficulty, +for the box was heavy, she managed to open it; but, having done so, it +seemed as if she almost forgot the purpose for which she wished it--for +clasping her hands together she wept long and convulsively. How many +bitter thoughts crowded upon her in that hour of weakness. Her mind +seemed to lose all its strength, as she hurried from the past to the +future. Where was the elastic promise of bold reliance on that future, +made by her mother's side? Where was that mother? Sleeping in the cold +grave, and as Mabel wept on, there might have come the thought that in +that grave there was peace and refuge, though the night winds even now +howled above it. How had she flattered herself that she had gained the +control of her own fervent imagination, and yet how it trembled at the +thought of the morrow. + +Hargrave, her infidel lover, so warmly loved and yet so steadily +rejected, how should she meet him on that morrow--did he still love +her, and if so, would he press his suit, and force her to fly from +temptation, or would he prove the truth of his threat, that with him +there was no medium between truthful love and contemptuous +forgetfulness. If so, how could she bear it, how would they meet day +after day, keeping up the formal semblance of politeness, and if it were +true, that he was making his suit to Caroline, how could she find +strength for the daily trials which would necessarily be hers. + +The quick, fiery blood of jealousy kindled in her cheek, as this last +thought arose, and she mechanically raised her hand and loosened the +twisted tresses of her hair, as if her heated brain needed relief. + +If there be, as some affirm, a good and evil angel to guard our way, and +track our steps through life, it was the evil angel that had power then. + +She felt it--she rose, and almost instantly sunk upon her knees. Her +clasped hands were now raised above her head--now clasped convulsively +over her face--as hour followed hour through that dark and cheerless +night, till her head gradually sank upon the bed by which she kneeled, +and she remained for a long time in perfect stillness. Her long, +disordered hair hiding every feature from sight. + +The Abbey clock announced the approach of the chill winter morning, +before Mabel again raised her head, but then her countenance was firm, +and there was a soft radiance about her eyes that told that those dark +and weary hours had not been spent in vain. + +Wearied with the long conflict, she laid herself down to rest, and was +soon asleep. + +Strong minds, when they are sick, require strong remedies; had any one +watched her calm repose, and quiet breathing, they might have told, that +with her the crisis was past. + +As she slept--flitting dreams crossed her fancy--once she thought she +stood upon a high hill, where a noble castle of fairy and transparent +beauty, was built immediately above a rocky precipice. Suddenly, as she +lost her footing, and fell, she tried to prepare for death, when +invisible hands supported her, and softly placed her on the bank above. + +Then her dream became more distinct--she was again at Aston, and the +setting sun was going down behind the hills--while its golden rays gave +beauty to earth and sky. She was seated on her father's tomb, in the +well-known church-yard, and close beside her was the delicate form of +the little Amy, which her arm encircled with the covetous clasp of +affection. They both gazed upon the setting sun, and the child listened, +as she spoke of the ages it had shone in beauty, and the ages it might +still shine; of the time it marked, and the eternity it presaged, till +her eyes grew brighter, and her color deepened. Then it seemed as if a +strain of holy music softly stole upon the evening air, and Amy raised +her hand to attract her attention to it--her face grew of more than +earthly loveliness, and, as the music died away, Mabel woke and found +herself alone. The moonlight streamed into her little room, rendering +every object distinctly visible. It is beautiful to see the mingling +light of the waning moon and rising sun changing the scenes of the early +morning with the rapidity of a diorama; Mabel watched the light for some +time with unthinking pleasure, till gradually upon her waking senses +arose the remembrance of the night, but with the early morning came the +strength for which she had so earnestly pleaded through those hours of +darkness. + +She had bent before the repeated strokes of Providence with something of +the feeling that her earthly duties were finished. But now came purer +and holier thoughts. "What right," she asked herself, "had she to say +that she had suffered enough?" Had she not already some call to +exertion, some friends whom she might perhaps love and serve, and more, +the fresh suffering that seemed in preparation, told her that it was +right to suffer. "Thy will be done," she repeated, in trembling +accents, as she knelt in meek and quiet devotion, and the words came +from a heart not untried by many sorrows. + +Mabel's mind was anything but morbid, for the dangerous tendency so +strongly developed in her mother, had been checked and controlled by +that very mother herself, who gladly saw in her more active child, the +same delicate perception of the beautiful, the good and the painful, +sobered by her care for others, and her love of exertion. + +It was then with a feeling of gratitude that she looked round the little +room, which, to many would have excited the most painful feelings of +neglect and desolation. The small bed had been evidently used, formerly, +in the nursery, and was diminutive in size; yet, as Kirk White, +humorously observes of his study fireplace:-- + + "So big, it covered o'er, + Full half the spacious room, and more." + +One side, from the ceiling, shelved down to the floor, leaving dark +corners, where the light from the small window never penetrated, giving +an uncomfortable suspicion of dust and cobwebs. The wide window ledge, +which served for the purpose of dressing table, with one shabby chair, +completed the fittings of the room--for, as Mrs. Villars had observed in +her casual glance--a chest of drawers had been omitted. + +It was impossible that any one so careful of the comforts of others--so +used to luxury as she had lately been, at Aston, should not read, at a +glance, the nature of the apartment which one of her mother's servants +would, perhaps, have hesitated to occupy--yet she busied herself in +arranging it to advantage. She could scarcely satisfy herself when she +had finished, for the room was not quite clean, and nothing she could do +could remedy that deficiency--so she turned to the window, and looked +out upon the back view it displayed of chimney-pots--dark back windows, +as cheerless as her own, and walls blackened by falling smoke. Still, +above the low dark, damp, courts, there was a glimpse of the pure blue +sky; and as Mabel's eye rested upon it, even the passing shade of +discontent vanished from her mind, as she remembered by whom her +comforts and trials were meted; and then she turned her eyes again upon +the room, and all that was uncomfortable before, seemed to have a light +about it that made it look different now. It was all better than she +might have had--more than she had any right to claim. Was she not under +her aunt's protection, when she might have been left with strangers; +left for the first time, in that kind of independence, most trying to a +delicate woman? "Was not every thing," she again repeated, "better than +she deserved? What could have made her think the room dark, and +uncomfortable? What could have changed it so? Nothing but the reflected +light of a humble and thankful heart. After remaining some little time +longer in consideration, she went down stairs. She soon found the room +where she remembered having been introduced the evening before; but, on +opening the door, she perceived that it was still darkened, the +window-curtains drawn, and the chairs arranged as they had been left on +the preceding night. Looking again at her watch to persuade herself that +it was really nine o'clock, she found her way to the drawing-room, which +was in such dusty confusion, that she was going to return to her own +room again, when a side door opened, and Mr. Villars appeared. + +"Come in, come in," he said, stopping her; "you will not find a good +fire any where else, for at least half an hour. My family are not fond +of early rising, as you see; so I generally take my breakfast alone." + +"Then, perhaps, I shall intrude upon you, sir;" said she, seeing the +preparations for his simple meal already made. + +"Not if you will have some breakfast with me; you look tired already, +and will be better for it. Only say so, and I will ring for a cup and +saucer." + +He laid his hand on the bell as he spoke, but hesitatingly, as if +accustomed to have his attempts at sociability negatived; but, when +Mabel readily assented, he cheerfully busied himself in preparing for +her. While he was doing so, she had an opportunity of scanning the +apartment, which her host designated his den. It was lined on two sides, +from the floor to the ceiling, with bookshelves, containing books of all +languages, arranged according to their different subjects. Part of +another side contained a selection from the best light literature of the +day--and, beneath, were drawers, that seemed to have a habit of being +always open, in which was a large store of written papers. The fourth +side of the room was ornamented by a collection of stuffed birds, +reptiles, and insects; curious specimens of botany, conchology, and +mineralogy--shewing the various studies in which Mr. Villars had, from +time to time, taken an interest. + +Upon a table, near the window, were placed some open books, marked at +different passages--together with scraps of paper, old envelopes, and +backs of notes, all neatly written upon. + +But the breakfast table was prepared with great neatness, and nothing +but an unopened paper of the day before gave any temptation to reading. + +Mr. Villars, having made the tea, and toasted his muffin, drew a chair +to the table, and begged her to partake of both. + +There is a kind of freemasonry by which some have the power of unlocking +the hearts of others, and making them unreserved; perhaps it is the +power of being genuinely natural oneself, which sets others so much at +ease. + +Mabel soon found herself conversing quietly, and without the least +effort; and Mr. Villars, without anything of his nervous hesitation, had +offered to assist her reading, by his advice, and instruction, as often +as she pleased to spend an hour or two with him. + +"May I then, feel free to come and go when I like;" enquired Mabel, +rising when they had finished breakfast. + +"Yes, at any time; at least, excepting when I have any particular desire +to be alone." + +"And then you must lock the door," she said, smiling; "because you might +not like to turn me out--so that shall be a sign that you wish to be +alone." + +"A very effectual sign indeed," said Mr. Villars, returning her smile, +though he suspected that he should not be often obliged to resort to +this defence, as it did not seem likely that she would be more attached +to his study than his daughters were. + +Mabel felt reluctant to leave the quiet repose of his society, but +unwilling longer to absent herself, she went to the breakfast room, +where, by this time, the whole party, excepting Hargrave, had assembled. +She stopped to give her aunt a kiss, with a warmth, which might have +told an intelligent observer, that the gratitude she felt for her +protection had closed her eyes to distrust. + +Caroline, who had been left mistress of the house in her mother's +absence, had intended the situation and furniture of her bed-room, at +once, to announce the fact, that if admitted to their circle, it must be +in the rank of a dependent. But this attempt to humiliate her, had +seemingly failed. Mabel appeared pale, subdued, and sorrow-stricken, but +evidently possessing a mind superior to trifles; and though, when she +took her seat apart from the table, her lip slightly trembled, and her +color came and went, not a sigh escaped from the sad heart within. + +Caroline, as she rose from breakfast, said that Hargrave had promised to +practise some duets with her, and she must go and find him--Maria and +Selina followed her--and Mrs. Villars went to her house-keeping, leaving +Lucy behind. + +There was a momentary and awkward silence--and then Lucy walked up to +her, and sunk down upon the floor at her feet, crying-- + +"How can you ever look upon me again? Think of my laughing and amusing +myself, when--" + +A shudder finished the sentence. + +And Mabel stooped to raise her head, whispering-- + +"It is too easy to forgive you--you were more unkind to yourself than to +me." + +"How?" said Lucy. + +"Because such things make the heart grow hard." + +Lucy was silent, for a moment, and then exclaimed-- + +"How I wish I were married, and had a home to offer you of my own. Then +you should not have such an old, poky bed-room as Caroline has looked +out for you--I had such a quarrel with her about it. She is jealous, +because I said you were beautiful, I know she is." + +"Ah, Lucy," said Mabel, "how unkind to try and expose the weaknesses of +a sister--remember the fable of the bundle of sticks. For myself, +knowing that I do not deserve her unkindness, I shall not feel it. I own +it is a trial--but as I am dependent on your mamma's kindness, by my own +choice, and by my wish to please her, and not of necessity, and I can +and will assert my independence when I please--it is quite a different +thing." + +"Are you going to be married then?" + +"No, no," said Mabel, smiling; "I will tell you what I mean another +day--perhaps I do not quite know how myself--I only know I will if I see +it best--but do not let us talk of that now." + +So saying, she took up a skein of silk which Caroline had been +attempting to wind. + +"Never mind that," said Lucy, "that is Caroline's, and she will never +thank you for the trouble you take." + +"Lucy!" said Mabel. + +"Ah, I know you are the best of human beings; but I do not know what you +would have been, had you been brought up in such a school as I have." + +"Scarcely four months have passed," returned Mabel, "since you spoke +that thought before. You have not used events rightly, if you can say it +sincerely now. Oh, why have you been so sorely tried," said she, placing +her hand fondly on her head--"Why have you been wounded so severely, if +not to purify you from the errors of the past? Might not those sad +events be made fit answers to the excuse you then made for yourself?" + +Lucy was going to reply, when a double knock at the hall door made her +start and blush, and then she jumped up, her face all radiance, and +hastily kissing Mabel's cheek, ran off to the drawing-room. + +Once more alone, Mabel tried to occupy herself with the silk she held in +her hand, but her heart was full, and tears silently stole down her +cheeks, and fell upon her busy fingers. + +Just then, Caroline returned, something had gone wrong in the singing +lesson, and her face wore its natural frown, and her cheek its angry +flush--she glanced impatiently at Mabel, and then stopping to warm +herself by the fire, looked angrily from it to her. + +"What! are you crying again?" she said, peevishly, for her temper had +become almost insane from indulgence. + +Mabel made no reply. + +"I hope," continued her cousin, "you are not going to be always +miserable; for poor mamma's sake, you should command your feelings." + +Mabel raised her eyes and looked firmly at her, as she said, slowly-- + +"I was alone." + +"And is that what you call resignation?" said Caroline, in a tone of +reproof. "I hope you will not give way to your poor mother's +disposition." + +"We mistake each other," said Mabel, rising, while her pale cheek +kindled, her head was proudly and firmly erect, and her eyes almost +flashed fire. + +Caroline quailed; an uneasy sensation of something like fear stole upon +her. + +"Perhaps," said she, her voice trembling with suppressed passion, "we +mistake our respective positions." + +"We do," said Mabel. + +Caroline would have been glad to relieve herself by some bitter speech, +but she felt powerless, and, endeavouring to hide her own discomfiture, +she swept indignantly from the room, saying that she had never believed +in perfect tempers, and she would have nothing to do with people who +tried to appear better than they were. + +Mabel continued standing, her bosom heaving with emotion. + +"I could have borne any thing but that--any reflection on myself," she +exclaimed, half aloud, "but to speak so of my poor mother, I cannot +bear. Ha--" she added, slightly startling on perceiving Hargrave, who +had entered by another door, and who was standing by her. + +Their eyes met for an instant and then hers sought the ground. + +"Miss Lesly," said he, coldly and peculiarly, "we have never met +before." + +She looked up to read his meaning. His countenance was impenetrable, +except that he seemed impatient for reply. There had been a time when +her lightest word could move him, and when, to her, his smile was +happiness, and his frown brought misery. Yet neither testified now the +least emotion. After a pause she replied. + +"You need not fear me, but I cannot, if I would, utter a falsehood. What +does it signify that we have met." + +"The past is forgotten, then?" he enquired. + +"It shall be as if it had never been," replied Mabel; "but as you were +candid then, be candid now." + +"Why?" + +"Because you cannot be happy without perfect confidence." + +A fleeting smile passed over his lips, but she saw it not. + +"You need not fear--no one shall take me under false pretences--I am +fallen indeed in your estimation, since you believe that possible." + +"No," replied Mabel, "I reverence and admire the beauty of the +structure, but I do distrust the foundation on which it is built." + +"Ah, some people do not think so deeply," he returned, gaily. + +"I fear not," said she, sadly. + +"Well, you have had trials sufficient," he added, "without adding mine +to them--do not fear for me, I hope some day to hear you congratulate me +on my happiness." + +Without waiting for a reply he took up a book, which he had made the +nominal reason for his visit to the morning room, and disappeared. + +She hurried quickly to her own little chamber, to think over this +strange conversation, which she believed conclusive of his attachment +to Caroline. But was she worthy of him, would she influence him +rightly--she tried to believe that the character drawn by her own quick +judgment was only wrought by jealousy. Not a little did she feel pained +at their quarrel, for she thought how easily might she prejudice her in +his opinion. + +"I can bear to lose his love," she thought, "but not his esteem--and yet +I must, if necessary, do both, perhaps, if she speaks ill of me, and he +will surely believe her." + +Those who have experienced many trials will remember, that sometimes, by +their quick succession, the mind becomes braced to endurance. It was so +with Mabel; besides, she had certain fixed principles, and though she +often erred from them, her mind almost invariably recovered its +strength; and she now endeavoured to school it to the endurance of those +small trials, which in her happy home at Aston, she had almost entirely +escaped. + + + + +CHAPTER XIII. + + The hope of fame may in his heart have place, + But he has dread and horror of disgrace, + Nor has he that confiding easy way, + That might his learning and himself display; + But to his work, he from the world retreats, + And frets and glories o'er the favorite sheets. + + CRABBE. + + +When Caroline quitted Mabel she hurried to her mother, with all the +petulance of a wayward child, and, with her, vented on Mabel the spleen +which she had not had the courage fully to express. Great was her +surprise when she found, that, instead of joining in her opinion, Mrs. +Villars only endeavoured to extenuate and defend Mabel's conduct, +though with that weakness which Caroline always had the hope of +overcoming; but, for once she was mistaken, and, more than ever +chagrined, the bitterness with which she regarded her cousin, only +increased. This Mabel had soon an opportunity of learning, and her +situation in the house became more and more uncomfortable, influenced as +it was, by those secret prejudices and envious feelings, which there is +no possibility of openly opposing. + +Lucy, too, though still an object of solicitude to her, seemed shy of +her company, and, indeed, held herself much aloof from every one but +Beauclerc, whose attentions were now very generally remarked. + +Still there was one room in the house where her presence was welcomed as +a real blessing, and this consciousness atoned to her for much that was +elsewhere almost unbearable. + +At first, with the shyness which often attends the student, Mr. Villars +frequently locked his door, but gradually the habit ceased altogether. + +One afternoon, he was sitting alone, his manner was restless, and his +eye absent in its expression. + +The atmosphere without was unusually humid; small rain, which, in the +distance, looked almost like fog, hid the prospect, and made the room +dark, giving nothing of the inspiriting feeling produced by a hearty +shower. Within, the room seemed heavy and sombre. But within Mr. +Villars' own thoughts there was something darker still, something cold +and numbing--something that said the world was a dark and gloomy +world--something that said he lived alone and uncared-for in it. He rose +and walked up and down the room--that dark feeling haunted him still. He +turned to the window--on its ledge lay his pen-knife--he looked at it +uneasily--then walked away--then returned--and again regarded it as if +it had the power to injure him. He returned to the table, on it lay a +bundle of closely written papers--he turned from them, and again found +himself at the window. + +That knife again. + +His thoughts grew darker--that something again stole over him, till the +sweat stood in drops upon his brow, and his eyes glared feverishly. + +Hark! He listens. The sound of a light footfall is in the passage--a +quick hand is on the lock, the door is opened, and Mabel is by his side, +looking uneasily and affectionately at him, with that expression of +light and beauty so peculiar to her. + +"You are ill--I am sure you are," she said; "let me call my aunt." + +"No, no," he replied, hurriedly, "I am better--if you will stay with me. +You must not go--you will not let them drive you from me." + +Mabel looked puzzled--but eagerly promised anything he desired. + +"Ah," said she, rallying her spirits, "I see it now. You have those +papers out again. Why are you always unhappy when you take them out?" + +"Because they remind me of disappointment," he replied, bitterly. + +"I have a great curiosity about them," said Mabel, "and have some fancy +that it is the manuscript of a book you have written." + +"You do not deny it--then do read it to me." + +"It would not give you any amusement." + +"Now, uncle, how can you tell that? I am sure it will not make you so +miserable, if you do." + +"Well, my little sage--but I must first tell you the circumstances under +which I wrote it, and the reasons I have for being disappointed." + +"Stay one moment then," said she, drawing his arm-chair to the fire, +which she stirred, till it sent a good flame up the chimney, then +seating herself opposite, she begged him to go on. Beginning to feel +happier, he scarce knew why he sat down, and, after a moment's +hesitation, he said-- + +"I was always very fond of writing, when a young man--I dare say, +thought myself something of a genius--but though I wished to devote +myself entirely to study, this was so much opposed by my more prudent +father, that I gave up my own inclinations, and entered into a lucrative +mercantile establishment in London. Not long after this, I married, and +then it appeared to me, to be my duty to devote myself entirely to +business, in order that I might acquire wealth for my wife, and +increasing family--but I gave myself too rigidly to the task--I gave +myself no ease--always fearing that I longed for it, only from the +desire for selfish indulgence. The consequence has been that my family +has been educated in a manner of which I strongly disapprove--and, alas! +I feel the evil is so great as to require something stronger even than a +father's displeasure to remedy it." + +Mr. Villars sighed, and then continued-- + +"In the short intervals of business, I noted down, from time to time, +scenes which were drawn either from real life, or my own fancy--together +with numerous remarks on the manners of my own times, which I thought +might be amusing--pining always to indulge what I falsely believed to be +a talent. + +"How often desired blessings bring a curse. A few years since my +speculations were successful beyond my expectations, and I found myself +enabled to retire from business with a good conscience. This place was +the scene of my happy boyhood, and of my school days, and here I +resolved to settle, since it offered pleasures suited to us all. + +"With the eagerness of a schoolboy I fitted up this study; it was the +very perfection of my taste, it contains every book I take any pleasure +in, and yet," he said, looking gloomily round him, "it has been to me +the scene of greater misery than even you, seemingly deprived of almost +every blessing, can calculate upon. + +"Secure as I believed of the interest of my family, for year after year +of, to me, heavy toil had, I believe, purchased it beyond a doubt. I +thought I would prepare them a treat, and so set about collecting my +scattered writings, and forming them into a whole, promising them a +reading every Saturday of what I had done in the week. + +"I never shall forget the first Saturday evening. You have, I dare say, +often heard that an author's vanity is capable of blinding him to the +opinions of others. I cannot understand the feeling myself, and I was +not slow in perceiving that my book soon failed to interest--but I tire +you." + +"You pain, but interest me," replied Mabel. + +"Well, it is hard to believe that one's composition is too bad to +interest those whose affection ought to make them indulgent to the +dullest of our pursuits; but so it was; they eagerly courted any other +Saturday engagement, and when they did come, they yawned or whispered +over their work, and seemed so completely wearied with my reading that +one day I threw down the book, and refused to continue. I forget what +followed, but I know I was never asked to resume my readings. From that +time I have been more and more alone, and I am sorry to confess that, +after years of well rewarded toil, I find life losing interest with me." + +Mabel started at the last words; there was an ominous meaning in them, +that terrified her--while she watched him now pacing the room again, +with a disturbed air, muttering exclamations of despair. She hastened to +interrupt him. + +"How very much I should like to hear your manuscript. Would you have +patience to read it to me?" + +Mr. Villars turned and looked full upon her; but she repeated her +request eagerly. She saw the coming of that mental cloud, which has +obscured many a noble intellect, and her eyes sparkled as she saw him +yielding to her request, and that the dawn of hope was again upon the +face of the disappointed student. + +"Evening is the time for a work of fiction," she observed, "but let us +have the first chapter now. If it will not tire you to read." + +"If you really wish it," he said, handling the papers with trembling +fingers. + +"Oh, yes, I do wish it, but let me first get my work, for that is to us +what chipping is to the Americans, it only assists our attention. While +you find the first part I will go and fetch it." + +Her errand took her longer than she had anticipated, for in the morning +room she found her aunt, with Hargrave, Caroline, and Selina discussing +a print with some eagerness. + +"I would give anything to have such a head-dress," exclaimed Caroline. + +"Well, my dear," said her mother, "I should be glad for you to have it +too, but I fear you must give it up. I am sure, Henry, you ought to be +complimented, for Caroline has been trying this hour to please you." + +"Well, it is a pity," said Hargrave; "she would look well in it, but I +am sorry I spoke of it, if it has given her so much trouble." + +Mabel stopped at the table, and taking up the print, exclaimed-- + +"I remember seeing something like this at Gibraltar. Perhaps I could +make it--may I try," she said, glancing at the crape which Caroline had +been cutting and wasting. + +"If you think you can do it," returned Caroline, "do take it and +try--but I want to wear it to-night, at the ball." + +"Then give me everything," said she, her manner excited from the scene +in the library; and gathering up the crape, ribbon, and wire into her +apron, she took the print and hurried to the library. When she entered, +Mr. Villars was seated by the fire, with some papers on his knees, but +the look of gloom had again settled on his usually patient face. "Oh, I +am so sorry to have kept you waiting," she said, anxiously, "but look +how much work I had to bring--now I am quite ready." + +Mr. Villars said nothing, but appeased by the affectionate warmth of her +manner began reading. + +She listened attentively, and gladly found herself interested, without +an effort, as she heard with surprise sentences, in a style of boldness, +and purity of devotion, which she had scarcely expected. + +Mutually pleased, the hours slipped away, Mr. Villars charmed by the +attention of his listener, while she busily continued her work. + +The small greasy rain dimmed the window, and darkened the room, till the +shades of evening closed upon them, but its influence had ceased. A +cheerful smile shewed the pleasure of the author, and the renewed hope +with which he began to feel inspired. + +"I scarcely know if I like the name--'The Merchant's Recollections;' it +is scarcely striking enough," said Mabel, when he stopped to rest. + +"I do not think I could call it anything else, after knowing it so long +by that name." + +"Well then, I suppose you must keep its name, but do make an effort to +have it published, or do so yourself. I am certain it would be popular. +Pray let me have what is in your hand, and I will give you the novelty +of listening to your own composition; but first, let me light your +little candle." + +With thrilling voice, and the purest accent, she read, and Mr. Villars +felt that he had never appreciated his own composition before. As he +listened, old recollections revived--an elasticity seemed given to his +thoughts. So carefully had the influence been obtained, which was now so +so cleverly exercised, that the sensitive author, with his keen +perception and acute sense of the finest tone of feeling, was impressed +with respect for his younger companion, who united sympathy in these to +a healthy strength of mind. + +Now as he looked, and listened to her, who had so timely rendered +succour to intellect sinking, from discouragement, into despair, he +gladly welcomed the new current of ideas which were crowding upon his +attention. The thought of giving to the world the work which had so long +occupied him, the chance of popularity, even the bitterness of failure, +would be far preferable to the state of apathy into which he had been +gradually falling. There was something stirring and exciting in the +idea; there was life and employment in it, and he embraced it with +rapidity. + +The dressing bell put an end to their reading, and Mabel then called +upon him to admire her workmanship, displayed in the pretty ornament she +had prepared, in imitation of that worn by the Spanish girl, in the +print, whose face was not unlike Caroline's. + +"Are you going to the ball, to-night?" she enquired. + +"I seldom go to those places." + +"But I think you would enjoy it to-night, for they are all going, and I +am sure would be glad of your company." + +"Well, I may perhaps; I might enjoy it." + +"I think you will, and then you will enter better into this to-morrow, +for you have a great deal to do, and I am bent on seeing it completed." + +"My good girl," said Mr. Villars, taking her hand with considerable +emotion; "you little know the obligations you have conferred upon me +to-day. I would give you all I possess for the power of conferring +happiness as skilfully as you can. Heaven bless you for it." + +"Providence often chooses the weakest instruments," said Mabel, "to +fulfil its missions; and I endeavour to keep myself ready for service, +lest I may lose the chance of being employed;" then blushing at her own +speech, she withdrew her hand, and hurried from the room. + +When they met at dinner, she begged Caroline to allow her to dress her +hair for the evening, to suit the head-dress she had been preparing. +The offer was readily accepted, and they retired together to the +dressing-room already mentioned. The comfort, and almost finical luxury +with which it was furnished, occurred to Caroline, as no very agreeable +contrast to that which she had prepared for the houseless orphan, so +lately deprived of all the comforts of home--but her attention was soon +occupied by her toilette, in which she took so great an interest. +Perhaps she would have been glad if their maid could have performed the +same services for her, with as much taste as Mabel; but as she could +not, she forced herself to accept her kindness with the best grace she +could command. The beautiful head-dress, contrasted well with her raven +hair; and when Mabel held the mirror before her, she scarcely believed +her eyes as she gazed upon her reflected self. + +"Come, I do believe you are a good girl," exclaimed Maria; "one of the +right sort, after all. I wish you would concoct something for +me--singularity is what I affect--but, I fear me, nothing will do," she +added, going off singing. + + There's nobody coming to marry me, + Nobody coming to woo; + O dear what can the matter be, + Oh dear what shall I do. + +The gay party were soon assembled in the drawing-room. Hargrave looked +pleased when he saw the head-dress, and made many observations on its +beauty, which delighted Mrs. Villars, and made Caroline's cheek flush +with pleasure. + +"Who knows," whispered Mrs. Villars, playfully pinching Mabel's arm, +"but that your pretty cap may hasten the denouement; look how pleased he +is." + +Mabel felt sick, but no one saw the sudden pallor of her cheek, for the +carriages which were ordered to take them to the rooms were announced. + +Caroline, drawing her ermine tippet closer round her shoulders, took +Hargrave's un-offered arm, saving:-- + +"You must be my first partner to-night, remember," and then walked down +stairs with him, talking playfully, and gaily. Mabel thought she had +never seen her look more beautiful. When they had all gone, she sunk +upon a chair, suffering from the revulsion of over exerted feelings. She +laid her hand upon her heart to still its beating; that heart, which +spite of all its chastenings, beat true to nature still. Had she only +decked Caroline to win a heart which was dearer to her than +life--dearest when she had rejected it, in the name of heaven. + +Oh, if Caroline were but one likely to lead back his truant heart to the +duties he had more than neglected. Yet she felt little hope when she +remembered her lifeless and listless Sundays--her wandering eyes in +church, and the witty remarks which told how her thoughts had there been +occupied. + +But she also felt that she had done right, and with this consciousness, +she could afford to abide by the consequences of her actions. Her +delicacy, also, soon reminded her of the necessity of putting a strict +guard over her imagination, lest even the pity and sorrow she felt for +him, might shew themselves, and be misunderstood. Grieve over him she +must, but she resolved that even he should not know it. It was a +difficult part for one so candid to play, but her delicacy stood upon +the defensive, and warned her to be firm. + + + + +CHAPTER XIV. + + Lady Clara Vere de Vere, + Some meeker pupil you must find, + For were you queen of all that is, + I could not stoop to such a mind. + + TENNYSON. + + +Mrs. Villars returned from the ball full of triumphant feelings. Never, +since her first appearance at the rooms, had Caroline appeared to such +advantage. Hargrave, who seldom did more than walk through a quadrille, +had twice asked her to waltz. Mrs. Villars had received, with gracious +smiles, many premature congratulations--and her husband, who had +despaired of Caroline's marriage, looked on with satisfaction, and +began to think everything was taking a brighter turn. + +The next morning, Mrs. Villars overwhelmed Mabel with thanks for her +ingenuity--and even, in the excess of her gratitude, confided to her a +long and exaggerated account of the ball, mixed with many speculations +on the probable causes which led Hargrave to delay his proposals. She +ended by announcing her intention, (if she did not consider it hurtful +to her feelings,) of giving a grand rout the following week. + +Mabel begged her not to think of her, as she could easily, if she +preferred doing so, spend the evening alone. Her aunt was, however, bent +on displaying herself as her benefactress, though she thought it better +to be contented, at first, with getting no opposition to her plan. + +Invitations were soon issued. Colonel Hargrave was persuaded to give up +a hunting party he had intended joining, and even to discuss the +numerous arrangements, of which none but good entertainers can +appreciate the difficulty. The music, the dances, the company, the +decorations of the rooms, were all thoroughly talked over, and +everything promised to make it the most popular party of the Bath +season. + +The girls were in high spirits, and congratulated themselves on +Hargrave's continued good humour. + +Selina declared he must have made up his mind, at last, and anticipated +looking pretty on a Shetland pony, at Aston, while Maria declared that +she had nearly "hooked" a Gloucestershire squire, and hoped Caroline +would give her an opportunity of landing him. + +On the morning of the party, Mabel was sitting in the library alone, +finishing some ornaments for the wax tapers, which her aunt had +requested her to make. Mr. Villars was gone to put a letter to a London +publisher in the post--and finding herself alone, she had given herself +up to thoughts of her mother and Amy--that dear sister, whose life she +had hoped to see so much happier than her own--then came to her memory, +which was well stored with every antidote to discontent, those beautiful +lines of Milman-- + + "We thank thee for our lost, our beauteous child, + The tears less bitter she has made us shed." + +And these told her how Amy's artless love had beguiled her first +disappointment of its bitterness, and called her to exert her energies +in a life of activity. + +As she continued this more cheerful train of thought, she heard a step +in the passage, whose echo thrilled to her very heart. How often had she +sprung at that signal in all the buoyancy of unchecked love; cold and +dark had been the change--the elastic step was now firm and majestic, +and she listened to it with attempted indifference, for they had learnt +to meet as strangers. + +Colonel Hargrave entered, and instead of leaving the room, as he now +always did, when he found her alone, he walked up to the fire, and stood +looking at her, for a moment, as her varying color made her face look +something more than beautiful. + +"I have a request to make," he said, at length. + +"One that I can grant, I hope," said Mabel; for the silence broken, her +courage was at once restored. + +"I would ask you to do violence to your own feelings, and appear at the +dance to-night?" + +"Why need I appear in a circle, where, being unknown, I cannot be +missed, when I feel naturally disinclined for gaiety?" + +"Because your influence is needed there. Do not think I am frivolous +enough to believe, that the admiration you may possibly excite, would +give you any compensation for the pain of appearing in that mourning +dress, amongst the light and gay; but there is one over whom you seemed +once to have some influence, who must be there, and you will have an +opportunity of seeing her in society." + +"Do you mean Lucy?" + +"Yes--I have watched her narrowly, for some time, and think she may be +made something better under proper guidance. Where is she to find that +but in you? She is now attracted by a man, whose attentions are, I fear, +too general to mean anything." + +"Are you certain Mr. Beauclerc means nothing?" said Mabel, +incredulously; "it is so difficult to decide--and almost impossible to +interfere." + +"Except by advice. Could you not persuade her to remain passive, and not +to pay him so much open admiration?" + +"Impossible;" said Mabel, "it must be that he is more reserved in the +display of his attentions than she is. Are you not severe?" + +"Depend upon it," returned Hargrave, "the truth is often more charitable +than falsehood, and I am not speaking now in the common spirit of +criticism. Lucy is rendering herself an object of general observation, +and even ridicule, to the gentlemen of her acquaintance, and though I +may be able to prevent such remarks being made in my presence, my +influence cannot extend further. She offends all her former ball-room +admirers by having eyes for no one but Beauclerc--she will dance with no +one else, and pays him an open tribute of admiration, which cannot but +be flattering from a pretty girl." + +"But I do not see why you suppose he is indifferent to her?" + +"If my observation has not deceived me, he shares, in common with many +men of talent--a belief in a feeling warmer than friendship, but colder +and more spiritual than love. I once knew a man, in fact, who carried on +such a flirtation, for I can give it no other name, with a very +superior, enthusiastic girl, but when every one expected him to propose +to her in form, she heard of his marriage with a woman of the most +ordinary understanding, but who, I dare say, made him a very good wife. +As I was attached to him, I ventured to remonstrate with him on his +conduct. In excuse, he brought so many really flimsy and poetical +apologies, and proofs of the pure minded nature of his attachment, that +though they appeared to me in their right light, they yet convinced me +that he had not intended wrong, but that his vanity had led him astray, +into the belief that he could be the object of an admiration superior to +love; altogether foolish, but he was sincere, I believe. When I last +heard of the poor girl she was sinking in a decline. Now I suspect +Beauclerc to be such another as I have described, and I want you to see +if you can make Lucy aware of it." "But you must first judge for +yourself, and no such opportunity is likely to occur again, as you might +not like to go out." + +"You set me a difficult task; the more difficult, because Lucy has +seemed so estranged from me lately." + +"Ah, that reminds me of something else, I had to say. Do you happen to +have met Miss Foster, a beautiful girl, one of the most striking women +in Bath?" + +"No, but I have heard Lucy speak of her." + +"Yes, so she used to do, most enthusiastically; and her beauty, if +nothing more, deserved admiration. I remember meeting her in the +park--she was sitting down, and, as I afterwards learnt, had sprained +her ankle. She looked so near fainting, that I did not hesitate to +dismount--(for I was riding)--and offer her my assistance. After a +little persuasion she gave me her direction and suffered me to place her +on my horse, which I carefully led to her house, in the Circus. The +grace with which she accepted my services, and the reserve with which +she withdrew from my attentions, when they were no longer required, +excited some curiosity in me; but, though I was repeatedly congratulated +for such a singular opportunity of meeting the mysterious beauty, I am +afraid I must confess that I was never able to improve the acquaintance. +Now, lately, she has withdrawn entirely from society, and, indeed, +up-stairs there is a polite note from her, declining Mrs. Villars' +invitation for to-night. I have heard it frequently remarked that she is +never seen out of doors, though some of her professed admirers have been +anxiously watching for her. Lucy seems entirely to have forgotten her, +and colored violently when I asked for her, the other day." + +"A long string of evidence," said Mabel, with a half smile, "now tell me +how you connect Miss Foster, with Lucy and Mr. Beauclerc." + +"Why, she was at an evening party the day before he arrived in Bath, and +has not been seen since; but this would be nothing perhaps had not my +groom--who, one morning, took my horses to air, through the Circus--seen +him call at her house, early, and thought, that when he was denied, he +turned away with disappointment. I immediately ordered him to air the +horses every morning in the Circus, though certainly not the best place +for them, which I might have chosen. However, the result of his +information is, that almost every day, before the fashionable world is +stirring, Beauclerc calls on Miss Foster, and is as strictly denied. To +me, this looks suspicious, and Beauclerc seems carrying on a double +game." + +"Perhaps she is only some relation, and he calls to leave the morning +paper," said Mabel. + +"Well, only judge for yourself, if he is sincere with Lucy; if you think +he is, we will leave them to themselves, but if not, the poor girl +should be warned before her affections are too deeply implicated." + +"Yes, I will appear to-night," said Mabel. + +What more she might have added was stopped by the entrance of Caroline, +whose jealous surveillance had discovered the _tête-à -tête_. Casting a +fiery glance of suspicion on both, which was received with admirable +coolness, she turned to Hargrave, and rather peremptorily informed him, +that the case of fruit and flowers which he had ordered from his +gardens, at Aston, was arrived, and they waited his permission to open +it. + +"Oh, I will come," said he, looking rather amused, than either sorry or +angry at her displeasure. "Miss Lesly, you will like to see some flowers +from Aston." + +Accepting the half implied invitation to accompany them, Mabel followed +to the morning room, where an immense basket was surrounded by Mrs. +Villars and her daughters, in anxious expectation, while china and glass +dishes were waiting to receive the fruit. + +The basket fully answered the demand upon it--and satisfied Hargrave as +to the state of his green-houses and hot-house, by producing some +excellent specimens of forced early fruit, which Mrs. Villars had been +anticipating, not only as an additional charm to her supper-table, but +as a public proof of his anxiety to please her. + +Besides flowers for vases, Hargrave drew from the basket, bouquets, +arranged with a gardener's nicety, which he presented to Mrs. Villars +and her daughters. They were composed of the most beautiful hot-house +flowers, and were all in exquisite taste--but by some chance, it +happened that the one presented to Caroline, far excelled the others in +beauty. The sisters exchanged glances, and Caroline's haughty eye beamed +with triumph. + +"Stay, what is this?" said the unconscious Hargrave, dipping his hand +again into the basket, and drawing forth from the moss, with which it +was carefully packed, a bouquet, much smaller in size, and singularly +pretty, because composed entirely of white flowers of the rarest kind. +"Is it not beautiful?" he exclaimed, holding it up to view; "it really +does my gardener credit." + +"Beautiful indeed!" exclaimed every one. + +"What is that paper round it?" said Maria. + +Hargrave turned to the small strip of rather untidy paper, which was +fastened to it, and read-- + + "Miss Lesly will accept this, with my respects." + +"From my gardener, Dibden, I declare," said he--a look of childlike +pleasure taking possession of his features, as he regarded the flowers +which smelt sweeter than all the rest--and then handing them to Mabel, +he begged her to accept them. + +Mabel held out her hand, and looked much gratified as she took them; but +no sooner had she done so, than the color rushed to Caroline's cheek, +and a scowl darkened her beautiful features, as she regarded her with +ill-concealed malignity. Her own bouquet no longer appeared the finest, +and flinging it on the table with such violence, that the head of a +camelia was broken from it, she said, angrily-- + +"I will have no second bests." + +"My dear," said her mother, trembling, "yours is, I am sure, the +prettiest." + +"Do you think I have no eyes," returned Caroline, "or that I am going to +be eclipsed in my own house?" + +Hargrave stood amazed, for hitherto her temper had been greatly +concealed from him, and he was surprised to see features, lately beaming +with smiles, now darkened and disfigured by rage, while he felt +something very like disgust at the jealousy which so openly betokened a +preference for himself. Mabel stood, with her eyes fixed on the flowers +she held in her hand, too pained to look up; then suddenly remembering +herself, she offered them to Caroline, saying-- + +"I am glad I have anything to offer you, that you really like--pray take +it." + +Caroline, however, was too provoked to be easily pacified by this +display, as she believed it, of superior sweetness of temper, and +roughly pushing aside Mabel's extended hand, the flowers fell to the +ground. + +Hargrave looked from one to the other in mute surprise; and Mrs. +Villars, terrified at her daughter's ungovernable temper, and mistaking +his look for vexation, hurriedly interposed. + +"Oh, my dear, now do take what Mabel offers you--do, my dear, if you +have a fancy for it--I am sure Henry intended to give you the best--who +could think you would prefer a few white flowers to that lovely +collection of geraniums. Come, my dear, now do have it." + +"I am sure," said Hargrave, indifferently, "I knew no difference in the +bouquets--I have nothing to do with poor Dibden's unfortunate present." + +"There now," said Mrs. Villars, "now do take them, if it is a fancy of +yours." + +"Don't be angry, love," said Selina; "only think what is to become of +the party if you and Henry quarrel. No one will have spirits for +anything. Don't, dear, be angry." + +"For my part," said Maria, "I see nothing to be angry about." + +"Nor I," said Hargrave, as he left the room. + +"Now see," said Mrs. Villars, "how you have vexed him." + +"Something more than that, I fear," said Maria. + +"Well, I really have no patience," observed her mother; "with lovers' +quarrels--there, smile and make it all right again. We all know what +your feelings are; but do, there is a dear girl, cheer up, for all our +sakes. Is she not a silly girl, Mabel." + +The latter was too candid to venture on a reply, as she stood busied in +restoring the bouquet to order. + +Caroline received these offerings to her wrath, with haughty +indifference; but, at length, she suffered herself to be appeased by +their repeated entreaties, and Mrs. Villars whispered to her niece, that +if she now offered the flowers, she thought the dear girl would receive +them. + +Mabel could scarcely allow herself to minister to so much selfishness, +and it was with some appearance of reserve, that she placed the bouquet +on the table, by her side, not choosing to subject it to a second +rebuff. + +But Caroline's good humour was now happily restored, for she had gained +all she could by her violence. Not only obtaining possession of the +desired object, but being entreated to accept it. She, therefore, +rewarded the patience of her mother and sisters, by entering into the +arrangements of the evening with renewed animation. + +"Mabel," said Lucy, as passing her arm through hers, they walked up +stairs together; "where did you get such an angelic temper?" + +"Whatever good I do possess," said Mabel, gravely; "is not mine; but is +borrowed from a treasure house, which is as free to you as to me." + +"But, tell me," urged Lucy, stopping on the landing place; "do you not +despise the weakness to which you minister." + +"What right have I to do so," answered Mabel; "who knows how proud and +self-willed I might have become, if I had not early suffered +deprivation, sorrow, and humiliation, as I have done. And who can say, I +shall be as strong to-morrow as I am to-day; when a thousand temptations +surround us on every side; and we cannot tell under which we may fall, +if we once lose sight of the true humility which alone brings strength +and power. How, then, can I dare to despise the frailty of others. But, +dearest, what is the matter, how can I have pained you." + +"You have not pained me," replied Lucy, a momentary color banishing the +pallor of her cheek; "but sometimes I feel as if there were something +wanting in me, which I find in you--yet, if it has been purchased by +suffering, I must not wish for it, for I have not courage for such an +ordeal." + +"But, only consider," replied Mabel; "how much more noble, how much more +worthy--if any could be worthy--would be the offering, to heaven, of a +young heart, in the midst of joy and prosperity--than the tearful +tribute of the worn spirit, which can find no other refuge. It is only +our own rebellion which makes sorrow needed." + +"Beautiful words," said Lucy, mournfully, "and something within tells me +that they are true;" she stopped for a moment, and looked down upon her +own share of the beautiful flowers, which she held in her hand, and a +tear hung upon the lash, which shrouded her bright blue eye; then +turning again to her cousin, she said:-- + +"To-morrow, dearest, I will think: to-night, must be all mirth and +gladness." + +Mabel would have remonstrated, but she saw that the serious fit had +passed away, by the beaming smile that lighted her face, and dimpled +round her mouth; and she knew her temper too well, to hope to recall it. +So the two girls separated. Lucy to think over the pleasures of the +evening; while Mabel, meditated how she might serve her, by screening +her from the consequences of her indiscretion. She could not, however, +refrain from reverting to the disagreeable scene in which she had taken +a part. She could not help feeling almost humiliated for Caroline, while +she regarded Hargrave's situation with commiseration; for she fancied +that, however he might have implicated the honor on which he so strictly +prided himself, with regard to Caroline, he displayed very little love; +and she sincerely pitied him, as she knew that, if he had once committed +himself, he would probably be too proud to retract. + + + + +CHAPTER XV. + + He spake of virtue: not the gods + More purely, when they wish to charm-- + Pallas and Juno sitting by. + + TENNYSON. + + +The united taste of the whole family had not been exerted without +effect--and their guests might well be delighted with the preparations +which had been made for them. + +On entering the house, tea and coffee waited them in the dining-room on +the right hand, and, after an opportunity of taking this refreshment, +they next ascended the staircase, which was brilliantly lighted, and +ornamented with evergreens. This led to the ante-room, from which +several doors opened on apartments all dedicated to the service of the +evening; something, indeed, to the detriment of the family comfort. +There might be seen, evergreens of the richest varieties, which were +intermingled with flowering and beautiful geraniums. + +On the left, a door opened into the apartment chosen for the reception +room, where was arranged everything that could minister to comfort. The +softest couches, the most lounging easy chairs, worked ottomans, and +foot-stools, which had occupied much of the sisters' time. This was +intended for those chaperones, who, through the folding doors which led +to the ball-room, preferred watching the dances, to joining in the whist +parties; for wherever they were seated, the ever revolving waltz would +be almost certain to bring to their view, those in whom they were most +interested. + +A more distant room, the one furthest removed from the sound of the +music, was selected for a card-room. + +But the ball-room had occupied most attention, and a brilliant effect it +certainly presented, that evening. Colonel Hargrave had had so many +expensive whims which no one hindered him from gratifying, and evidences +of his expenditure or his taste might be seen in every part of the house +that night. Round the room, seats were arranged for the dancers, which +being here and there interrupted by evergreens, and hot-house plants, +formed, as the sisters well knew agreeable opportunities for those +_tête-à -têtes_ which they were so clever in sustaining. + +Mrs. Villars looked forward to this evening with elation, but yet with +some share of anxiety also. Nothing, she felt, but the complete success +of her schemes could justify to her husband, the expenditure in which +she had lately been so lavish, and, though she was indifferent to his +censure in trifles, she feared to excite his serious displeasure by any +great offence. + +She was thinking of this as she stood with him and Hargrave, in the +lounging room, where they waited to receive their guests, watching to +observe the effect caused by Caroline's entrance. + +"The girls are late," said, Mr. Villars, nervously consulting his watch, +"it will be awkward if any one comes." + +"I think I hear them, sir," said Hargrave. + +At the same time the door opened, and the four sisters entered; even +Maria looked well in the studied _negligé_ of her appearance, but +Caroline looked brilliant as she entered, with her majestic steady step, +and well-pleased countenance; while the pure white flowers for which she +had so bitterly contended, rested in all their simplicity upon her +haughty breast. + +"Yon have not forgotten your promise, I hope," she said, playfully +resting her fan upon Hargrave's arm, "of inviting a great many of your +gentlemen friends." + +"Oh, no, I have selected a few of my acquaintances, but with care; for +when entrusted with the privilege of affording introductions to ladies, +one cannot be too careful." + +"Fudge," exclaimed Maria; "as if it signified who one waltzed with for +an evening." + +"What," exclaimed Hargrave, "does it not signify whose arm encircles +your waist?" + +"Oh, come, do not squabble, do you know we are to have the pleasure of +Perfection's company, to-night; I should not be surprised to see her +come down with a dress up to the throat, and down to the wrist, a +walking sermon on the degeneracy of the age." + +"Really, mamma," said Caroline, smiling at the latter remark, "you ought +to have ascertained if she had a dress fit to appear in." + +"Mabel is always dressed well," said Lucy, "though she seems to take so +little pains about it." + +"Oh, perfect, most perfect," said Maria, holding up her hands and +raising her eyes in affected admiration, "Henry, do you not appear very +small in her company." + +"Perfectly infantine," he returned, with a good-natured smile; "but +hush, here she comes." + +Maria took up the hush, and repeated it so loudly that it deadened every +other sound, and caused a blush to mantle on Mabel's cheek, as she +entered. She looked a little timid as she advanced into the little +circle. + +To tell the truth, her garret toilet had had only the assistance of the +good-natured cook, who, alone, in the general bustle, had found time to +think of her; yet there was not a single fault to be found with it, and +Caroline bit her lip with vexation, when, instead of the ill-dressed +bashfulness she had expected, she felt the influence of a something +wholly indescribable, yet all fascinating, in her appearance, as she +quietly stood by her uncle's side. + +As if seized by sudden impulse, Hargrave stepped forward, and requested +the favour of her hand for the first dance. Mabel replied that she did +not intend dancing at all that evening, and, though, apparently +dissatisfied, he was compelled to submit. + +Mrs. Villars drew him a little aside, for Caroline's glowing eyes +preluded a storm. + +"You know," she said, laying her hand confidentially on his arm, "that +Caroline has been hoping for the pleasure of opening the evening with +you--you will not disappoint her?" + +"Pray tell her I shall be very happy," he replied, a little peevishly. + +"Caroline, my love," she said, immediately turning to her daughter, +"Henry feared you were engaged, but as I do not think you are, I have +ventured to promise him your hand for the first." + +Hargrave could scarcely repress a smile at this adroit falsehood, and as +he seconded her request, Caroline graciously consented. + +Mabel felt slightly annoyed, she scarce knew why--perhaps because she +had been too pleased a moment before--at seeing how quick the cloud +passed from Hargrave's brow: it never occurred to her to doubt the truth +of what Mrs. Villars said. + +They were, however, no longer left to their own entertainment, for +guests began to crowd in, till the rooms were filled to overflowing; +young and old, pleased, to-night, with the entertainment they would +criticise on the morrow, prepared to enjoy themselves. + +Upon the principal sofa in the reception-room, two old ladies were +seated, the Lady Scratchal and the dowager Mrs. Pierce, who, from some +reason or other, claimed a double share of respect in the houses where +they visited, partly, perhaps, because they both possessed unlimited +power over the large fortunes they enjoyed, and appeared to have not +altogether determined how to dispose of them. There is an instinctive +power in wealth, which the world often feels without stopping to +analyse, and this these two ladies exercised with ready tact over their +acquaintance. + +"No one gets up a party like Mrs. Villars," observed Mrs. Pierce to her +friend. + +"But I think there is a great deal more of display than there ought to +be," returned Lady Scratchal, whose hollow cheeks and sunken eyes, +formed a melancholy contrast to the sparkling diamonds which encircled +her wrinkled brow, and the youthful hair which surmounted it. + +"Ah!" said Mrs. Pierce, "I am afraid, she is silly enough to reckon on +the rich colonel for her Caroline--but I am greatly mistaken if there is +any love there." + +"Men did not make love in that way, in my time, certainly," observed +Lady Scratchal, the ominous shake of her head covering the shades of +many departed admirers. + +"Well, and you know," observed Mrs. Pierce, "that I have my doubts about +that other gentleman--we need not mention names--for you know who I +mean, I am sure." + +"With Lucy?" enquired her friend. + +"Yes," replied Mrs. Pierce; "I am sadly afraid--" + +She did not finish her sentence, but followed it up with many dreadful +shakes of the head, and other symbolical actions, which Lady Scratchal +seemed perfectly to understand. + +Their attention was, however, diverted, by seeing Hargrave hurrying to +the door to receive, with a hearty shake of the hand, a young man, who +was entering with rather an abstracted air, till roused by the +heartiness of his welcome, to which he immediately responded. Hargrave +then hurried him to his hostess, who started, when she heard his name +given as Captain Clair, yet concealed every sensation of annoyance, for +fear of offending her wealthy relation. Mabel met him with unfeigned +pleasure, and eagerly enquired for news of Aston, and her kind friends +at the rectory; but Lucy having given him a trembling, feverish hand, +for an instant, turned away, impatiently, and fixed her eyes upon the +door. + +It was so tantalising to see one after another enter, well-dressed, +good-looking, and welcome to all but her. Her head was giddy with +watching, and her ear had become so acute from listening, that she could +distinguish footsteps on the stairs, from the hum of many voices, and +the merry music which made her poor head ache. + +How gladly, too, in the presence of Arthur Clair, would she have +appeared the admired and loved of the far more talented Beauclerc. +Regardless of the eyes of the watchful dowagers, she thought and teased +herself till her very beauty seemed to fade before the workings of her +restless and ill-governed imagination. And Clair seemed to watch her +with a pitiful expression--perhaps, he believed her as broken-hearted +for him, as he was for Mabel. Enraged at this idea, she would accept the +first partner, who presented himself, and suffer him to lead her to the +giddy round, where, with excited, restless spirits, she would seem the +merriest of them all; but tired, in a few minutes, she would take the +first opportunity of returning to the lounging-room, and there, sinking +into a chair, she would indulge in a fit of thought, more soothing from +its very painfulness, than the merriment in which she had so lately +joined. + +She was sitting thus, late in the evening, under the severe, but +unheeded scrutiny, of Lady Scratchal and her friend, when the well-known +and long watched-for step was heard, and Beauclerc, looking more +handsome and more pensive than ever, entered. Entirely forgetful of +everything but the long hours of dreary monotony, which had preceded his +coming, she started up, and her face was, in an instant, radiant with +smiles, as she walked quickly across the room to meet him, extending her +pretty hand with a mingling of playfulness and pleasure in her manner. + +"Where have you been, truant?" she cried, suffering him to retain the +hand which she had so warmly extended; "did you not know how dull +everything would be without you?" + +"Had I really guessed as much, I might have delayed the business which +detained me, though at some inconvenience," he said, kindly, but +gravely, leading her to one of the recesses, where he took a seat beside +her. + +"Ah," he added, thoughtfully, "you little know of how great a value your +kindness has been to me--now, while my spirits seem to sink within me. +How should I ever have borne my heavy trial without such a sweet +comforter, as you have proved yourself to be to me." + +"Ah," said Lucy, her eyes falling beneath his anxious glance, "how proud +I ought to be, to have been able to administer comfort to such a mind as +yours." + +"All the mental energy we possess," returned Beauclerc, in the same sad +tone, "does not equal the magic of one kind word from a feeling woman." + +"I am too glad to have the power of serving you," said Lucy, as her eyes +sparkled with pleasure. + +"And is it really a pleasure to you to serve me," repeated Beauclerc, +looking at her with liquid eyes--"then yes--I think--yes, I will be bold +enough to ask you to serve me still further; but first you shall know my +history--a painful story indeed--but it is fair that you should know it, +before you bestow any further kindness upon me. But when could I find +such an opportunity?" + +Lucy thought, for a moment, and then replied-- + +"I often walk before breakfast--and if you happen to meet me any morning +in the park, you can tell it me there undisturbed." + +"Will you walk to-morrow?" he enquired. + +"Very likely I may; but stay, I will go to-morrow, because they will not +be down till eleven, I know, so there will be plenty of time for you to +say anything you like." + +"Ingenuous, kind-hearted girl," he exclaimed; "I know some who hide +their coldness, for the feelings of others, behind a prudish reserve, +which would not allow them to do such a vastly improper thing, as meet a +gentleman in their morning walk--but you are not of the number of those +worldly beings--I will be waiting for you at that corner, where there +is, if I remember rightly, an old Jupiter's head." + +"Very well," said Lucy; "but you must take the chance of my coming, as +it is very late now. Is it not nearly three o'clock? I never spent so +long an evening." + +"You are tired, I see; but we will join this last waltz--for such it +ought to be, I am sure." + +So saying, he passed his arm lightly round her waist, and was soon +amongst the dancers. + +Mabel had been no inattentive observer of Mr. Beauclerc's entrance, and +she perceived that Lucy seemed to excuse to herself the open admiration +she paid him, by considering him as a kind of demi-god, while he +appeared contented rather to suffer than to encourage that admiration +which he too plainly perceived. + +"Hargrave had, for some time, stood by her in silence, bent on the same +observation. + +"Well," he said, speaking at length--as if he would challenge her +thoughts. + +"I hope--but fear," she replied; "how lovely she looks to-night." + +Hargrave gave vent to an impatient "hum." + +"What influence can I possess against such an infatuation?" enquired +Mabel. + +"The influence of common sense," he replied; "I never witnessed such +absurdity in my life." + +Mabel sighed, for she knew how impossible it was to govern Lucy, when +bent on having her own way. + +She perceived, also, for the first time, that Hargrave was either out of +spirits, or in one of his obstinate humours; and, when Caroline joined +them, which she did almost immediately, he broke from them, and +retreated to a group of gentlemen near the door-way, with whom he had +spent the greater part of the evening, much to his fair cousin's +chagrin. Perhaps, an incautious remark of Mrs. Villars, on his intimacy +with her daughter, which, possibly, he had overheard, might have led to +this inconsistent conduct; for he had ably resisted all her little plans +to bring them together. + +Mrs. Villars was sensibly annoyed; and Caroline, who, in the course of +the evening, had overheard many remarks in praise of Mabel's beauty, and +had been repeatedly called upon to join in praising her--felt enraged +with her, as, what she termed, the under-ground cause of her failure. + +In vain Selina looked all that was fascinating, and smiled all that was +good-natured--in vain Maria jested--the spirits of the hostess were +infectious, and soon communicated their influence to her guests, who, +one by one, took their leave, and hurried away, sooner, perhaps, than +they might have done. + +The family party were once more alone--and when the last guest had been +civilly disposed of, stood regarding each other in bewildered silence, +surrounded by failing wax-lights, and the ruins of gay bouquets; with +the echoes of the now silent music still sounding, in fancy, in their +ears. + +Hargrave, without waiting to discuss the evening, during which he knew +he had taken so unpopular a part, bade them, hastily, good night, and +hurried down stairs, where he encountered Clair, who, as if spell-bound, +had lingered till the last, and now busied himself in a forlorn search +for his hat. + +Hargrave offered to lend him one, and took him into his room. They found +the fire burning so brightly, and all looking so snug, that they were +tempted to remain talking over it, till the lost hat was forgotten. + +Mabel, anxious to offer a word of counsel, proposed to accompany Lucy to +her room, to assist her in untwisting her hair; but this Lucy declined +coolly and evasively, and she too, departed, feeling a depression +arising from the lateness of the hour, and an evening spent in heated +and noisy rooms, with which she was hitherto unacquainted; and it was +some time before she could shut out the moving panorama, which +perpetually presented itself, and close her eyes in sleep. + +In order to make arrangements for the display shewn that evening, the +whole house had been overturned; but, in the amusement of the +preparations, none had felt the many little inconveniences to which they +had all laughingly subjected themselves; but now the scene was changed. +Nothing appeared more wretched to the sisters than all being obliged to +occupy the same sleeping apartment, and submit to all the little acts of +self-denial, which good-nature would only have discovered to be amused +with. Wearied, fatigued, and disappointed, few felt so chagrined as Mrs. +Villars, when, after seeing to some necessary household duties, and +waiting till her kitchen was cleared of half intoxicated waiters, she +retired to her room, anxious to shut out the unpleasant thoughts of the +evening in sleep. She was not therefore very agreeably surprised to find +her eldest daughter waiting for her. + +It was with difficulty that Caroline had suppressed her temper till that +minute; and, though it was already morning, she felt it impossible to +retire to rest without first venting it upon her indulgent parent, whom +she regarded, (as most spoilt children do their parents), as the +malignant cause of all her sufferings, real or imaginary. Mrs. Villars +would willingly have escaped, feeling herself too distressed, and too +tired to frame those excuses and cunning falsehoods which had been so +often applied, to heal the wounds of an acrimonious temper; but it was +in vain; for Caroline indignantly flinging herself down into a chair; +exclaimed-- + +"I knew how it would be--it is all your doing--and I do think if you had +felt like any other mother, you would have spared me such a +mortification." + +"I!" replied her mother, almost equally irritated by fatigue and +disappointment, "I spare you mortification! how can I make the man love +you! It is your own vile temper which is in fault." + +"Whatever I may be," replied Caroline, bitterly, "I am what you have +made me; but I can tell you, that if that girl is to be suffered to +queen it over us all, I am not the one to stand it, I would rather go +out as a governess." + +"Mabel! what has she to do with it?" enquired Mrs. Villars, not sorry to +have the blame thrown off her own shoulders. + +"Did you not see Henry speaking to her, and to no one else; and did he +not ask her to dance before me; and did not Lady Scratchal say that, if +she were you, she would not suffer such an artful girl--who knew how to +make such use of her good looks--to be with her daughters, if she had +any." + +"But, Cary dear, remember the poor child has no home, and I promised +her mother she should find one here." + +"Very well," said Caroline, tossing her head angrily, "I see how it is; +she has already supplanted us with papa, and she is going to do the same +with you." + +"My love," said Mrs. Villars, quite overcome by this appeal to her +parental affection, "you know better than that; you know how much I +would sacrifice for you--any thing--everything." + +"Then send her away," said Caroline, bursting into tears. + +"I will see about it, I will think to-morrow," replied her mother. + +"No; say you will, to-night," urged Caroline, kissing her, "just say you +will." + +"Go my love, now--there is your papa, on the stairs--and he will not +like to find you here." + +Caroline was, reluctantly, forced to hurry away, and her mother, once +more alone, endeavoured, in vain, to reconcile her desire with her +policy. Almost equally with her daughter, she wished to get rid of +Mabel, for she was not blind to the fact, that her gentle dignity of +manner, joined to her self-denying temper, contrasted ill with the +characters of her daughters; yet, there was one obstacle which she had +no power to remove; for, possibly, Mabel was aware of the loan granted +by her mother, and might be regarding her stay in the house, as the +condition upon which it would be cancelled; otherwise, how could she +have so cheerfully evaded every attempt to humiliate her. + +Finding it impossible to meet this view of the subject in any +satisfactory manner, she thought that the most comfortable plan would be +to postpone the consideration of it till Caroline should again renew the +topic; trusting to her ingenuity for some plan for getting out of the +difficulty, should Caroline's obstinacy force her to do any thing which +would oblige Mabel to seek some other refuge. And, having come to this +decision, she sunk into a dreamy sleep, from which she was only awakened +by the noon-day sun. + + + + +CHAPTER XVI. + + But oh, to know that our heart has been, + Like the toy of an Indian queen, + Torn, trampled, without thought or care, + Where is despair like this despair. + + L. E. L. + + +The next morning was the beginning of one of those early and fleeting +days of spring, which are so gladly welcomed at the close of a long +winter. The rising sun smiled mildly and pleasantly, and all nature +welcomed its beams by dewy freshness from herb and flower. Here and +there, some few buds, the graceful blossom of the nut, and the silken +tuft of the palm, gave promise of coming leaves and flowers, while the +yellow crocus and the primrose, soon to become so plentifully luxurious +in meadow and hedgerow--here and there looked forth from their dewy +bed--rich treasures for those who sought them. + +It was not, however, to welcome these early harbingers of spring, that +Lucy Villars hurried past the streets, and entered the Victoria Park, +which, though at a late hour of the day, the fashionable lounge of the +inhabitants of the gay city, was now scarcely the resort of a single +person. + +As she went on with rapid step, her cheeks flushed, and her bright eyes +beamed with expected triumph. + +"Why," she hastily reasoned, as she entered the silent walks, "why +should Beauclerc have sought such an interview, if not to make her +acquainted, rather with the history of his present feelings, than with +his past life; and what could those feelings be, if they referred not to +her. Or, perhaps, some obstacle lay in his way, which one light word of +hers might be able to remove." + +But she had reached the appointed spot, and now stood there alone. A +mass of rock-work, surmounted by the cumbrous head of some heathen God, +was the place appointed. Was it like a lover, to be so unpunctual! +rather should he come an hour too soon, than one minute too late--for +the first time, she began to feel an uneasy conviction of the +impropriety of her situation; but sophistry seldom, till too late, +deserts those who trust in it. The grim head frowned down upon her; as +she walked up and down before it, reasoning with herself, that there +could be no possible harm in taking a morning walk, to dissipate the +weariness of a ball. She had a quarter of an hour for reflection, but, +as it was spent in such reasoning it was of little service to her. At +the end of it, Beauclerc was seen advancing in the distance. He must +perceive her, and now retreat would be foolish and unavailing, had she +even desired it, which she did not; for the thought of being able to +announce her proposed marriage to her mamma and sisters, not as a matter +of speculation, but of certainty, made her heart beat vehemently; and +she did not stop to analyse the feeling of infatuation or vanity, which, +in its effect, seemed so akin to love. + +"Have you waited for me, Miss Villars?" he enquired, when he reached +her, with his usual earnest manner, but with less of ardour than she had +expected--so she replied hastily and carelessly-- + +"Oh, no, only a few minutes; but I see I am a better riser than you +are." + +"Perhaps an earlier sleeper; I have scarcely closed my eyes since we +parted; but you will take my arm and then--." He stopped and sighed. + +"And then," replied Lucy, "and then." + +"I will, if you still desire it," he replied, in a tone which checked +her playfulness, "repeat some part of my own sad history, in order that +you may give me that assistance which I am told you have the power to +afford me. If, indeed, I am not mistaken in hoping that you feel some +kindly sentiments towards me. Some part you know already." + +Lucy raised her eyes archly, but said nothing. Her companion seemed +satisfied, for he continued, still more gravely-- + +"Where, or how shall I begin?" + +"Who are you--what are you--and why are you sad?" said Lucy. + +"Who am I? Yes, that will do very well," said he, suddenly assuming the +quick flow of language most natural to him. + +"Like your father, mine was a wealthy merchant; I was his only son, and +he earnestly prided himself on bestowing upon me all the learning and +accomplishments which money could procure. The advantages of a +first-rate education, joined, perhaps, to some natural ability, enabled +me to shine at the University; and I left Oxford to pursue the study of +the bar in Lincoln's Inn, trusting to be able to use my money skilfully +in the pursuit of fame; but how fallacious are all the expectations of +human life! My father made some enormous speculations, and, after years +of successful ventures, failed this once and for ever. He did not many +days survive his loss, and dying broken-hearted, left me heir to his +poverty; but how unfit for it--accustomed, from infancy, to the +gratification of every whim--lavish in my expenditure, and boundless in +my ambition, with nothing but a profession, yet untried, and a feeble +dependence on a sick uncle. What a fall for one accustomed to all the +elegances of life. But this was not all; I had at this time become +acquainted with the daughter of a banker, reported to possess enormous +wealth." + +"What can be coming," thought Lucy, beginning to feel uncomfortable. + +"I had not hesitated to seek her," continued Beauclerc; "she returned my +affection, and we fondly looked forward to our union. But, when my poor +father died, I felt that we must meet on different terms, and that I had +no right to claim a promise given under such different circumstances. I +felt, indeed, the curse of poverty, too bitterly, to wish to make her a +sharer in it; and so I went to her at once, and offered to resign all +pretensions to her hand." + +"You may imagine how a generous warm-hearted girl would receive such an +offer. She saw at once, that nothing but my love for her induced me to +make it; and declared that she was ready to share my poverty, and would +become my wife, as soon as I was able to marry. She only stipulated that +I should enter on my professional duties, with some chance of success, +in which case she promised to obtain her father's consent." + +Lucy began to listen with that constrained attention which a person +possessed by nightmare, might give to some horrid vision, from which +they would willingly break, though obliged to wait its conclusion in +silence. Beauclerc, however, seemed too much occupied by his own +thoughts to regard hers, and presently, continued:-- + +"I was then almost without money or resources; but, being of a confident +disposition, I felt there were few things which love could not +surmount. I knew, besides, that my wife must be the heiress to her +father's wealth, for she was an only child--but, as I was unable to +settle any thing of my own upon her, I was timid of approaching the +subject; particularly, as, whenever I did so, her father seemed so +pained, that I instantly dropped it again. I could not but feel +gratitude for this delicacy towards my feelings, and this trust in my +honour, where so dear a child was concerned, and I resolved to deserve +it. I was far too proud to be dependent on him; and, therefore, +privately borrowed money on bond--took chambers, furnished a small +house, and obtained a few briefs through the interest of some of my +father's friends; and probably, had I been careful, I might have done +well. + +"This industrious commencement induced my intended father-in-law to give +his consent to our marriage; and, in a few months, I had the +satisfaction of seeing my wife at the head of a small, but elegant +establishment. Poor thing, she had been so accustomed to the luxuries +of her old home, that she never doubted me when I told her that mine +was arranged with the greatest economy. + +"But the consciousness of deceiving her, and the perpetual dread of that +wretched debt always hovering round me, insensibly soured my temper, and +wore upon my spirits. But this only called forth the depth of her +affection. She was never weary of pleasing me, and my very fretfulness +rendered her more sweet and patient. It was beautiful to see," he +continued with emotion, "how she schooled her naturally fiery and +uncurbed temper, to bear my sour complaint, or peevish rebuke. Beautiful +to see how little it humbled her when she was most patient; and what a +sweet, and gentle, and loving wife, the spoilt child of wealth had +become, at my bidding. But, let me spare myself the agony of +remembrance. A greater trial was yet in store for her; for we had +scarcely been married six months, when her father died. I had by that +time become so deeply in debt, that, though I hated myself for it, I +felt relieved by the news which fell so heavily on my wife. + +"If the clouds we so much dread, are often big with blessing--how often +is the sunshine only the fore-runner of the storm? + +"In a few days I had cause to know this; for I found, when affairs were +inspected, that, instead of being, as I expected, possessed of +thousands, I was again the heir of a ruined man. And, even worse, ruined +myself; for it was only upon this tacit expectation that I had obtained +credit, and creditors would soon press upon me. I knew, now, that all +hope was gone. Ah, wretch that I had become, simply, perhaps, because, I +had despised the common-place business of money matters. + +"Almost mad with the intelligence I had just learned, I rushed home to +insult my innocent wife, with the knowledge of her parent's disgrace. +Heaven forgive me, I must have been mad, or I could not have done it. + +"I well remember it was morning, and I found my way, I scarce knew how, +to her dressing-room--she was weeping--but when I entered, she tried to +dry her tears. I was, however, past control, and bitterly did I reproach +her for the deception, I alleged she had practised upon me--taunting her +with angry violence. At first, she seemed stunned, by what she learnt +from my wretched complaints--but then, as if suddenly stung to the +quick, she retorted on me, accusing me, with bitter calmness, of having +loved her for her expected fortune. I hardly know what I replied--but +bad enough it was, I know--I, passionate and abusive; she, cold and +contemptuous--and then, with a bitter curse, I left the house. + +"I hurried out of town; any where to forget myself--some where to the +country; it did not signify where. The cool air refreshed me, and nature +called me to better feelings, for, happily, passion is of short +duration--it told me, as I lingered amongst its beauties, of our happy +honeymoon--it told me how, from that time, I had declined in my kindness +to the wife whom I believed I loved better than self, and how, through +all the trying months which had followed, she had preserved an unvarying +meekness of temper, till that one day, when, galled beyond endurance, +she had ventured to oppose passion to passion. Such sweetness might well +atone for this single act of opposition--and spent with rage, and half +repentant, I resolved to return and forgive her, though in a dignified +manner; and to offer her my continued love and protection, if she +desired to accompany my flight abroad, which I felt certain she would be +too willing to do. + +"There was a stillness about my house when I returned, which I was not +surprised to find, for it was a house of sorrow--yet I had not noticed +it so much before--I was late, as I intended, hoping to find my wife +frightened and penitent--yet she did not come to meet me--no one did but +my man, who asked me, with the tone of one accustomed to a sharp answer, +'if I intended waiting dinner for his mistress?' I hastily replied in +the affirmative--and concealing my alarm, I hurried to the room where I +had left her. A note lay upon her dressing-table, and, in the haste with +which I opened it, something fell jingling to the ground. The note +itself contained a few lines, written in a decisive tone, expressive of +farewell, and telling her determination of renouncing, at once, my +protection and my name. I stooped to pick up what had fallen--it was her +wedding ring--that ring which, in happier days, we had so delighted to +look upon, because the pledge of a faith which, it seemed, she could so +easily cast aside. + +"Let me pass over that dreadful day of stupefaction, and bitter +repentance, at the end of which I found myself in prison, for all care +for liberty had passed from me when she went--and I had not even tried +to fly. You see," he continued, perceiving that Lucy listened with +breathless attention, "that I was, thus, prevented from instituting any +enquiry; and, indeed, I felt glad to hide myself from her eyes, for how +could I wish her to acknowledge me in a prison--I believe I was +completely humbled, and when I say that, I say a good deal--and that I +was truly so, must be seen by the candour with which I have unveiled my +meanness. Tell me, do you not pity me?" + +Lucy made no reply. + +He continued, in a more agitated voice-- + +"Do not turn from me--you can, you will serve me, I know. Stay, I forgot +to finish my story. Only two months since, my old uncle died, and +bequeathed me his whole fortune. He did not know I was in prison, or he +might have cancelled this will. It found me there, wretched and +desponding, and relieved me from its chilling influence. Once more free, +I discharged every debt of honesty or honor, and then sought for my +wife. I found that she had again taken her maiden name, which enabled me +to trace her to this city. The rest you know." + +"I don't," screamed Lucy. + +"Good Heavens," cried Beauclerc, seizing her hand, "the bosom friend of +Millie Foster, and not know--" + +A hysterical scream, and another, and another, burst from the poor +girl--she sunk fainting in his arms. + +What was to be done--Lucy could not be left--yet Beauclerc felt the +increasing awkwardness of the scene. In his interest in his own +narrative, he had not had time to mark her rising agitation till too +late to check its effects. + +As he was bending over her, endeavouring, with trembling hands, to untie +the strings of her bonnet, a hasty step struck upon his ear, and turning +quickly, he confronted Captain Clair. + +"Beauclerc," said the latter, sternly, "what does this mean?" + +And, as he said this, he turned full upon him, with anger flashing in +his eyes. + +Beauclerc turned pale, and then red, as he answered his angry glance, +saying, hurriedly-- + +"There has been some fearful mistake here: indeed, indeed, it has been +no fault of mine." + +"No fault of yours," said Clair, even more sternly, "that you have drawn +the eyes of all Bath upon your heartless flirtation, and subjected a +young girl's name to the ribald jest of any who chose to comment upon +it. As I am a soldier, you shall answer for it." + +"Whatever you do," said Beauclerc, with a face of ashy paleness, "let us +think of her first. Do not let this get abroad." + +"Canting hypocrite," cried Clair, fiercely, "do you not know that you +have made her a jest, in every place where men congregate, and you would +ask me not to let this get abroad--stand back from her I tell you." + +Beauclerc, however, did not heed the latter remark, for, having +succeeded in loosening the strings, he threw back her bonnet, and +suffered the morning air to play, undisturbed, among her fair tresses, +and over her heated brow, and, as it did so, the color slowly returned +to her blanched lips, and again breathing more freely she slowly raised +her head; and then, perhaps, feeling able to stand, she drew herself +from the support of Beauclerc's arm, and, as she did so, encountered +Clair; she looked at him for an instant, with a terrified expression, +and then hid her face in her shawl. + +"Will you let me take you home, Miss Lucy," he said, in an abrupt, but +kind voice, at the same time, handing her, her bonnet, which he held in +his hand, and studiously turning his back on Beauclerc. + +"Home!" said Lucy, almost wildly. + +Clair made no reply, except by placing himself by her side. + +"Yes, I will go anywhere," said Lucy, in the same vacant tone. + +He drew her hand within his arm, and without a second glance at +Beauclerc, who stood like one who had lost his senses, he hurried her +forward at a brisk pace. + +She did not speak, and, it is probable, almost forgot whose arm +supported her; neither did Clair attempt to gain her attention, till +they reached her father's door. He suffered her to enter alone, waiting +a short interval before he himself gained admission, when he hurried to +Hargrave's room. The latter was waiting for him with some anxiety, and +turned towards him as he entered. + +"Well!" he exclaimed, "nothing, after all, I trust?" + +"Nothing!" said Clair, "nothing! when I found her in the Park, lying in +his arms in a fainting fit--scoundrel." + +"And you have brought her home?" + +"Yes; she came very willingly when I asked her. What had passed I cannot +divine, but if she does not know the truth already, the sooner she does, +no doubt, the better. Have you seen Miss Lesly?" + +"Yes; she promised to keep watch for her, and they are together by this +time." + +"So far so good, then," said Clair, endeavouring to compose himself into +his naturally careless air, "now for Beauclerc--I declare," he added, +brushing his hand angrily over his eyes, "it almost unmans me to see a +woman in distress." + +"And yet, my dear Arthur," said Hargrave, laying his hand kindly on his +shoulder, "I fear you are not guiltless." + +"Well, if I have given her pain, nobody else shall. Come Hargrave, will +you go to him, I can trust no one so implicitly as I can you." + +"If you are determined on meeting him, I will go, certainly, but only +consider, first, how little right you have to take up her quarrel, and +the unnecessary publicity you give to the affair." + +"With regard to that, how, I cannot tell, but, depend upon it, before +to-morrow night, the affair will be discussed in every _coterie_ in the +town." + +"What do you require, then?" said Hargrave, taking up his hat. + +"The most ample apology." + +"And who shall I say you are--a friend of the family?" + +"Never mind that--he knows me, I was his friend once, and he will not +enquire into my right to question his motives." + +"Very well then, wait for me in your rooms at the Lion, and I will join +you directly." + +"I have seen him--stay, where is he?" + +"We are both at the Lion, so we will walk there together," said Clair, +following him into the street. + +A few minutes walk brought them to the hotel, and, parting at the public +entrance, Clair proceeded to his room, while Hargrave sent in his card +to Beauclerc. + +He was immediately admitted. + +Beauclerc was standing by the table, his face expressing much internal +agitation, while his usual self-possessed air was entirely gone. + +Hargrave, on the contrary, was perfectly cool, but very grave, as he +bowed to him somewhat stiffly, and said, courteously-- + +"My friend, Captain Clair, was--" + +"I know what you would say, Colonel Hargrave," interrupted Beauclerc, +quickly, "he would ask me for an explanation of the strange +circumstances under which he met me this morning--I will not ask what +right he has to question my conduct--I am too angry with myself to seek +to take shelter under any such subterfuge--I have done wrong, I now see, +but how to atone for that I cannot tell." + +"I fear there is no atonement to be made, except the poor satisfaction +of an open explanation and apology." + +"That I am most ready to make," replied Beauclerc, with unaffected +sadness, "and I wish I had more to offer." + +He then hurried over what he had repeated before to Lucy, while +Hargrave listened with that acute attention which seldom failed to give +him an insight into the characters of those about him, when he chose to +exercise it. + +"Miss Lucy Villars," said Beauclerc, in conclusion, "was the first +acquaintance I made here, and, knowing her to be the intimate friend, +nay, almost the only admitted friend of my wife, I looked upon her with +peculiar interest--not for an instant doubting her knowledge of the +connection existing between her friend and myself, from the readiness +with which she fell into my confidence--and, indeed, from her replies to +all my allusions to the subject. Believing that she knew me to be a +married man, I never (pardon my alluding to this subject,) thought the +attention she bestowed upon me any other than that, which love for her +friend, and pity for my situation, called for." + +"Are you sincere in that?" said Hargrave suddenly, changing his tone of +courteous attention to deeper earnestness, as, with his dark eyes fixed +upon him, he waited his answer. + +"I am," returned Beauclerc, decidedly. + +"And you were not aware of the danger in which you placed a young girl +of ardent imagination?" + +"I might, had I considered; but I did not consider." + +"And I may suppose myself warranted in conveying to my friend this +explanation, together with the fullest apology for the mischief you have +unknowingly caused." + +"Most certainly." + +"Then, sir," said Hargrave, rising, "however deeply I may regret the +mistake which has arisen between you and Miss Villars, I feel bound to +offer my testimony to the sincerity of your purpose." + +"Thank you, thank you," cried Beauclerc; "where I was wrong, was, +perhaps, in believing the possibility of a friendship of so much warmth +existing between a young girl of singular attraction, and myself, a +married man." + +"Why, yes," replied Hargrave, sternly; "I am not a married man myself, +yet I have my own peculiar, and, perhaps, very strict notions of the +duties of married life, which would scarcely admit of the freedom you +have allowed yourself." + +"You open my eyes," said Beauclerc, as if a sudden idea had occurred to +him; but then, remembering he was speaking to a stranger, he colored, +and was silent. + +Hargrave, unwilling to intrude on his private confidence, by any further +remark, immediately wished him good morning, extending his hand, as he +did so. Beauclerc shook it warmly, thanking him for his patience and +temper, and, with many repeated assurances of regret, suffered him to +withdraw. + +He immediately went to Clair, who was waiting for him, with some +impatience, and, in a few words, repeated the subject of his +interview. + +"There," he said, in conclusion, "I have done my best, and so I think +have you. It is as I suspected--Beauclerc had really no intention of +doing harm--and Lucy would have suffered none, had she not jumped to the +conclusion that, of course, he admired her. We cannot, with the best +will in the world to serve her, atone for the consequences of her own +folly--and this, I fear, she has displayed in the whole affair. What a +pity it is that girls possessing so many natural attractions should not +wait to be sought." + +"A great pity, indeed," said Clair; "I know few girls who would be more +attractive than Lucy Villars, if she had but the one necessary +appendage--sterling principle." + +"Perhaps, it may be so," said Hargrave, "and if she had, besides, a +greater, and a less reliance, on her own powers. But we have had +excitement enough for one morning in settling her affairs. I am going +into the country, will you walk with me?" + +"Willingly," said Clare, taking his hat and stick. + +And the two young men sallied forth together for a long country +excursion. + + + + +CHAPTER XVII. + + Oh, pass not, pass not, heedless by, + Perhaps thou canst redeem + The breaking heart from misery, + Go, share thy lot with him. + + +When Lucy reached her own room, she found Mabel waiting there--but +without taking any notice of her, she sunk down upon her bed, and +remained gloomily silent. + +Mabel offered no consolation, for there is a dignity in grief which +calls for something like respect; she, therefore, busied herself in +getting the chamber restored to something like order, that Lucy might +not be disturbed; and as soon as she heard her aunt stirring, she went +to her, though most reluctantly, to communicate as much as she knew of +the morning's adventure. As she anticipated, she had to bear the brunt +of her wrath, for Mrs. Villars, with the unreasonable temper of +disappointment, was almost ready to blame _her_ for the whole +occurrence. Mabel, however, listened to her patiently, glad to shield +the unhappy Lucy from the angry observations which she had herself to +endure. She then returned to her cousin, and remained with her for the +rest of the day--though there seemed very little to repay this patient +attention to her feelings. Lucy turned with peevishness from her +sisters, when they either offered their pity, or attempted to gratify +their curiosity, and they soon left her to herself. + +For the last few weeks, her spirits had been kept up to an unnatural +pitch of excitement, and she had danced late, and walked early, without +shewing the slightest fatigue; but now her nerves suffered from +reaction; and sleepless nights, and fatiguing days, all seemed to +oppress her then; and before that evening had closed in, her burning +brow, which could scarcely find rest upon the pillow--her parched lips, +and feverish pulse, frightened her companion, and she hastened to Mrs. +Villars, begging her, that she might be allowed to send for a doctor. + +"What!" exclaimed the latter, indignantly, when she heard this request, +and speaking very loud; "what! send for Mr. Mildman, that he may carry +the scandal all over Bath? No; I will do no such thing. She never took +to these absurd whims, till she went to Aston, and I will not have them, +and that you may tell her. Say, it is my wish that she should get up and +shew herself." + +"Shew herself where?" thought Mabel, as she slowly retreated; "in the +Pump-room--the assembly rooms--or the crowded streets? and what chance +of real comfort could they offer? callous they might indeed make her to +the sufferings of life, but to its better feelings also." And she +returned, with renewed diligence to the couch of her restless patient, +resolved that no want of kindness at home, should make her seek it +abroad; but she was soon convinced, also, that her aunt was so far right +in believing that Lucy's sufferings were rather mental than bodily. + +She seemed sullen and selfish in her grief; and, heedless of her +cousin's presence, she would turn her face away, or, burying it in the +clothes, seemed resolved to hug her disappointment, as closely as she +had cherished her former infatuation. She answered, with peevish +bitterness, any attempt to cheer her, and when her mother or sisters +paid her a visit, she obstinately refused, either to speak or listen to +them. This conduct they were little inclined to bear; and one after +another, as she gave up the task, readily agreed, that, as Mabel did not +mind it, it was better to leave the two alone; so that she spent her +time almost entirely in the sick room, unless when she went down to the +study to give some passing word to Mr. Villars, and to run away with +some passage which he wished copied. As she was one day returning from +him, a servant handed her a letter, which she stopped on the +landing-place to read--it ran as follows:-- + + "Miss Lesly will, I trust, pardon the liberty I am now taking in + addressing her--and will allow me, through her, to say some words + in vindication of myself to Miss Lucy Villars--and to tell her, + that, when I first sought an introduction to her, it was under the + impression that she was the bosom friend of my wife, from whom + circumstances had separated me--and with the hope that she might + aid me in obtaining a quiet reconciliation. That we never spoke + openly on the subject, I allow--but I frequently alluded to + it--believing that she understood me. That she did not, I lament; + and if in the course of our friendship, I have displayed so much of + my admiration for her artless candour, and ingenuous beauty, as to + place my sentiments in a doubtful light, I most sincerely repent + having done so, and entreat her to forgive me. Again soliciting + Miss Lesly's pardon, and begging her to convey all the apology + which a delicate mind can with delicacy accept, I remain, her + obedient servant, + + "ALFRED BEAUCLERC." + +At this moment Hargrave ascended the stairs, and Mabel handed him the +letter, saying-- + +"Pray read this, for you are a better judge of character than I am." + +"You cannot, then," replied Hargrave, "detect the deception which +prevents some people from reading themselves. Now I really do not think +this man knew he was exactly flirting, for the knowledge that he was a +married man made him admire the confidence and freedom which would have +disgusted him had he been single." + +"Why?" + +"Because," replied Hargrave, smiling, "he would have suspected motives, +which, being married, he knew could not exist." + +"But this was still very, very wrong." + +"I own it; marriage should be like the Devonshire lane of the poet's +song; and he is most unhappy who looks over its high hedges to discover +more beauties in the scenery beyond, which he has given up for ever. +Still, I do not think Beauclerc meant any harm; at least, when I called, +on the part of Captain Clair, to demand an explanation, he assured me +so, in such a simple manner, that I felt it impossible to doubt him; and +you must know how very imprudent Lucy has been; she was likely to bring +such a thing upon herself, becoming attached to him, without enquiry as +to who or what he was, and having no certainty with regard to his +sentiments. So I think it would be much better to hush this foolish +affair up as quietly and quickly as possible." + +"Then what shall I do?" enquired Mabel, taking the letter. + +"Try to make Lucy think no more than may be beneficial to her. Write to +Beauclerc, absolve him, and treat his offence as trifling, and, promise +that she will do as he desired--become a mediator between him and his +wife." + +"Thank you," said Mabel, scarcely suppressing a smile at the difficulty +of her task; and she went on to Lucy's room; as she did so, she heard a +step hastily retreat from the top of the stairs, and the rustling of a +silk dress. + +For the first time, Mabel found Lucy in a sound sleep, and, fearful of +waking her, she took up a book, and seated herself by the fireplace, for +fire there was none, though the day, for February, was particularly cold +and cheerless. + +She had been sitting thus for nearly an hour, when looking to see if +Lucy still slept, she found that she was awake, and with her large +light blue eyes filled with tears, was gazing at her with a gentle +earnestness, which was a relief to see, after the angry flush, which had +before so constantly marked her countenance. + +"Will you ring the bell, if you please," said Lucy. + +Mabel did as she was desired, and, when the servant entered, Lucy said-- + +"I wonder that Miss Lesly has been suffered to sit so long without a +fire. Will you light one directly, Jemima?" + +As Jemima did so, she watched the preparations with more interest than +she had lately regarded any thing. + +When they were again alone she said-- + +"Can you tell me how it was that Captain Clair happened to see me in the +Park that morning?" + +"Because he went out on purpose to meet you." + +"And why?" + +"Do you remember, that after the party, Colonel Hargrave went to bed +earlier than we did?" + +"Yes; I think I do." + +"Well, when he went down stairs, he found Captain Clair, who had lost +his hat, so he offered to lend him one, and took him into his +room,--where they found the fire blazing so temptingly, that, late as it +was, they sat down to talk, and in the course of conversation, Captain +Clair remarked on your intimacy with Mr. Beauclerc, which he had noticed +that evening, and, in return, Colonel Hargrave observed, he was supposed +to be paying you attention, and that it was generally expected that he +would soon come forward. But why need I tell you all this?" + +"Because I wish to know--pray go on, what then?" + +"Why, then, Captain Clair startled him by saying, that he knew him very +well, and that he was married, though separated from his wife. Colonel +Hargrave, feeling very much distressed, for he is very kindly +interested in you, and had many doubts of Mr. Beauclerc, before--went on +talking and planning with Captain Clair, how to break such disagreeable +news to you--and, while they were doing so, you came down stairs, and +went out. Now, as this appeared to them very singular--after a night of +such fatigue--they suspected something wrong, and, with the hope of +being able to serve you, Captain Clair followed you at a distance, +keeping you in sight, though he did not like to interfere till he saw +you faint." + +Lucy listened with attention, but made no remark, and when Mabel left +off speaking, she again buried her face in the bed-clothes, and seemed +to sleep. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Mabel, Vol. II (of 3), by Emma Newby + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 40199 *** |