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D.W.] + + + + + +A ROMANCE OF YOUTH + +By FRANCOIS COPPEE + + + +BOOK 2. + + +CHAPTER V + +AMEDEE MAKES FRIENDS + +Meanwhile the allegorical old fellow with the large wings and white +beard, Time, had emptied his hour-glass many times; or, to speak plainer, +the postman, with a few flakes of snow upon his blue cloth coat, presents +himself three or four times a day at his customers' dwelling to offer in +return for a trifling sum of money a calendar containing necessary +information, such as the ecclesiastical computation, or the difference +between the Gregorian and the Arabic Hegira; and Amedee Violette had +gradually become a young man. + +A young man! that is to say, a being who possesses a treasure without +knowing its value, like a Central African negro who picks up one of +M. Rothschild's cheque-books; a young man ignorant of his beauty or +charms, who frets because the light down upon his chin has not turned +into hideous bristles, a young man who awakes every morning full of hope, +and artlessly asks himself what fortunate thing will happen to him +to-day; who dreams, instead of living, because he is timid and poor. + +It was then that Amedee made the acquaintance of one of his comrades--he +no longer went to M. Batifol's boarding-school, but was completing his +studies at the Lycee Henri IV--named Maurice Roger. They soon formed an +affectionate intimacy, one of those eighteen-year-old friendships which +are perhaps the sweetest and most substantial in the world. + +Amedee was attracted, at first sight, by Maurice's handsome, blond, curly +head, his air of frankness and superiority, and the elegant jackets that +he wore with the easy, graceful manners of a gentleman. Twice a day, +when they left the college, they walked together through the Luxembourg +Gardens, confiding to each other their dreams and hopes, lingering in the +walks, where Maurice already gazed at the grisettes in an impudent +fashion, talking with the charming abandon of their age, the sincere age +when one thinks aloud. + +Maurice told his new friend that he was the son of an officer killed +before Sebastopol, that his mother had never married again, but adored +him and indulged him in all his whims. He was patiently waiting for his +school-days to end, to live independently in the Latin Quarter, to study +law, without being hurried, since his mother wished him to do so, and he +did not wish to displease her. But he wished also to amuse himself with +painting, at least as an amateur; for he was passionately fond of it. +All this was said by the handsome, aristocratic young man with a happy +smile, which expanded his sensual lips and nostrils; and Amedee admired +him without one envious thought; feeling, with the generous warmth of +youth, an entire confidence in the future and the mere joy of living. In +his turn he made a confidant of Maurice, but not of everything. The poor +boy could not tell anybody that he suspected his father of a secret vice, +that he blushed over it, was ashamed of it, and suffered from it as much +as youth can suffer. At least, honest-hearted fellow that he was, he +avowed his humble origin without shame, boasted of his humble friends the +Gerards, praised Louise's goodness, and spoke enthusiastically of little +Maria, who was just sixteen and so pretty. + +"You will take me to see them some time, will you not?" said Maurice, +who listened to his friend with his natural good grace. "But first of +all, you must come to dinner some day with me, and I will present you to +my mother. Next Sunday, for instance. Is it agreeable?" + +Amedee would have liked to refuse, for he suddenly recalled--oh! the +torture and suffering of poor young men! that his Sunday coat was almost +as seedy as his everyday one, that his best pair of shoes were run-over +at the heels, and that the collars and cuffs on his six white shirts were +ragged on the edges from too frequent washings. Then, to go to dinner in +the city, what an ordeal! What must he do to be presented in a drawing- +room? The very thought of it made him shiver. But Maurice invited him +so cordially that he was irresistible, and Amedee accepted. + +The following Sunday, then, spruced up in his best-what could have +possessed the haberdasher to induce him to buy a pair of red dog-skin +gloves? He soon saw that they were too new and too startling for the +rest of his costume--Amedee went up to the first floor of a fine house on +the Faubourg St. Honore and rang gently at the door on the left. A young +and pretty maid--one of those brunettes who have a waist that one can +clasp in both hands, and a suspicion of a moustache--opened the door and +ushered the young man into a drawing-room furnished in a simple but +luxurious manner. Maurice was alone, standing with his back to the fire, +in the attitude of master of the house. He received his friend with warm +demonstrations of pleasure. Amedee's eyes were at once attracted by the +portrait of a handsome lieutenant of artillery, dressed in the regimental +coat, with long skirts, of 1845, and wearing a sword-belt fastened by two +lion's heads. This officer, in parade costume, was painted in the midst +of a desert, seated under a palm-tree. + +"That is my father," said Maurice. "Do I not resemble him?" + +The resemblance was really striking. The same warm, pleasant smile, and +even the same blond curls. Amedee was admiring it when a voice repeated +behind him, like an echo: + +"Maurice resembles him, does he not?" + +It was Madame Roger who had quietly entered. When Amedee saw this +stately lady in mourning, with a Roman profile, and clear, white +complexion, who threw such an earnest glance at her son, then at her +husband's portrait, Amedee comprehended that Maurice was his mother's +idol, and, moved by the sight of the widow, who would have been beautiful +but for her gray hair and eyelids, red from so much weeping, he stammered +a few words of thanks for the invitation to dinner. + +"My son has told me," said she, "that you are the one among all his +comrades that he cares for most. I know what affection you have shown +him. I am the one who should thank you, Monsieur Amedee." + +They seated themselves and talked; every few moments these words were +spoken by Madame Roger with an accent of pride and tenderness, "My son +. . my son Maurice." Amedee realized how pleasant his friend's life +must be with such a good mother, and he could not help comparing his own +sad childhood, recalling above all things the lugubrious evening repasts, +when, for several years now, he had buried his nose in his plate so as +not to see his father's drunken eyes always fastened upon him as if to +ask for his pardon. + +Maurice let his mother praise him for a few moments, looking at her with +a pleasant smile which became a trifle saddened. Finally he interrupted +her: + +"It is granted, mamma, that I am a perfect phoenix," and he gayly +embraced her. + +At this moment the pretty maid announced, "Monsieur and Mesdemoiselles +Lantz," and Madame Roger arose hastily to receive the newcomers. +Lieutenant-Colonel Lantz, of the Engineer Corps, was with Captain Roger +when he died in the trench before Mamelon Vert; and might have been at +that time pleasant to look upon, in his uniform with its black velvet +breastplate; but, having been promoted some time ago to the office, he +had grown aged, leaning over the plans and draughts on long tables +covered with rules and compasses. With a cranium that looked like a +picked bird, his gray, melancholy imperial, his stooping shoulders, which +shortened still more his tightly buttoned military coat, there was +nothing martial in his appearance. With his head full of whims, no +fortune, and three daughters to marry, the poor Colonel, who put on only +two or three times a year, for official solemnities, his uniform, which +he kept in camphor, dined every Sunday night with Madame Roger, who liked +this estimable man because he was her husband's best friend, and had +invited him with his three little girls, who looked exactly alike, with +their turned-up noses, florid complexions, and little, black, bead-like +eyes, always so carefully dressed that one involuntarily compared them to +three pretty cakes prepared for some wedding or festive occasion. They +sat down at the table. + +Madame Roger employed an excellent cook, and for the first time in his +life Amedee ate a quantity of good things, even more exquisite than Mamma +Gerard's little fried dishes. It was really only a very comfortable and +nice dinner, but to the young man it was a revelation of unsuspected +pleasures. This decorated table, this cloth that was so soft when he put +his hand upon it; these dishes that excited and satisfied the appetite; +these various flavored wines which, like the flowers, were fragrant--what +new and agreeable sensations! They were quickly and silently waited upon +by the pretty maid. Maurice, seated opposite his mother, presided over +the repast with his elegant gayety. Madame Roger's pale face would light +up with a smile at each of his good-natured jokes, and the three young +ladies would burst into discreet little laughs, all in unison, and even +the sorrowful Colonel would arouse from his torpor. + +He became animated after his second glass of burgundy, and was very +entertaining. He spoke of the Crimean campaign; of that chivalrous war +when the officers of both armies, enemies to each other, exchanged +politenesses and cigars during the suspension of arms. He told fine +military anecdotes, and Madame Roger, seeing her son's face excited with +enthusiasm at these heroic deeds, became gloomy at once. Maurice noticed +it first. + +"Take care, Colonel," said he. "You will frighten mamma, and she will +imagine at once that I still wish to enter Saint-Cyr. But I assure you, +little mother, you may be tranquil. Since you wish it, your respectful +and obedient son will become a lawyer without clients, who will paint +daubs during his spare moments. In reality, I should much prefer a horse +and a sword and a squadron of hussars. But no matter! The essential +thing is not to give mamma any trouble." + +This was said with so much warmth and gentleness, that Madame Roger and +the Colonel exchanged softened looks; the young ladies were also moved, +as much as pastry can be, and they all fixed upon Maurice their little +black eyes, which had suddenly become so soft and tender that Amedee did +not doubt but that they all had a sentimental feeling for Maurice, and +thought him very fortunate to have the choice between three such pretty +pieces for dessert. + +How all loved this charming and graceful Maurice, and how well he knew +how to make himself beloved! + +Later, when they served the champagne, he arose, glass in hand, and +delivered a burlesque toast, finding some pleasant word for all his +guests. What frank gayety! what a hearty laugh went around the table! +The three young ladies giggled themselves as red as peonies. A sort of +joyous chuckle escaped from the Colonel's drooping moustache. Madame +Roger's smile seemed to make her grow young; and Amedee noticed, in a +corner of the dining-room, the pretty maid, who restrained herself no +more than the others; and when she showed her teeth, that were like a +young puppy's, she was charming indeed. + +After the tea the Colonel, who lived at some distance, near the Military +School, and who, as the weather was fine, wished to walk home and avoid +the expense of a cab, left with his three marriageable daughters, and +Amedee in his turn took his departure. + +In the ante-chamber, the maid said to Maurice, as she helped him on with +his topcoat. + +"I hope that you will not come in very late this evening, Monsieur +Maurice." + +"What is that, Suzanne?" replied the young man, without anger, but a +trifle impatiently. "I shall return at the hour that pleases me." + +As he descended the stairs ahead of Amedee, he said, with a laugh + +"Upon my word! she will soon make her jealousy public." + +"What!" exclaimed Amedee, glad that his companion could not see his +blushes. + +"Well, yes! Is she not pretty? I admit it, Violette; I have not, like +you, the artlessness of the flower whose name you bear. You will have to +resign yourself to it; you have a very bad fellow for a friend. As to +the rest, be content. I have resolved to scandalize the family roof no +longer. I have finished with this bold-faced creature. You must know +that she began it, and was the first to kiss me on the sly. Now, I am +engaged elsewhere. Here we are outside, and here is a carriage. Here, +driver! You will allow me to bid you adieu. It is only a quarter past +ten. I still have time to appear at Bullier's and meet Zoe Mirilton. +Until tomorrow, Violette." + +Amedee returned home very much troubled. So, then, his friend was a +libertine. But he made excuses for him. Had he not just seen him so +charming to his mother and so respectful to the three young ladies? +Maurice had allowed himself to be carried away by his youthful +impetuosity, that was all! Was it for him, still pure, but tormented by +the temptations and curiosity of youth, to be severe? Would he not have +done as much had he dared, or if he had had the money in his pocket? +To tell the truth, Amedee dreamed that very night of the pretty maid +with the suspicion of a moustache. + +The next day, when Amedee paid his visit to the Gerards, all they could +talk of was the evening before. Amedee spoke with the eloquence of a +young man who had seen for the first time a finger-bowl at dessert. + +Louise, while putting on her hat and getting her roll of music--she gave +lessons now upon the piano in boarding-schools--was much interested in +Madame Roger's imposing beauty. Mamma Gerard would have liked to know +how the chicken-jelly was made; the old engraver listened with pleasure +to the Colonel's military anecdotes; while little Maria exacted a precise +description of the toilettes of the three demoiselles Lantz, and turned +up her nose disdainfully at them. + +"Now, then, Amedee," said the young girl, suddenly, as she looked at +herself in a mirror that was covered with flyspecks, "tell me honestly, +were these young ladies any prettier than I?" + +"Do you see the coquette?" exclaimed Father Gerard, bursting into +laughter without raising his eyes from his work. "Do people ask such +questions as that, Mademoiselle?" + +There was a general gayety, but Amedee blushed without knowing why. +Oh! no, certainly those three young ladies in their Savoy-cake skirts +and nougat waists were not as pretty as little Maria in her simple brown +frock. How she improved from day to day! It seemed to Amedee as if he +never had seen her before until this minute. Where had she found that +supple, round waist, that mass of reddish hair which she twisted upon the +top of her head, that lovely complexion, that mouth, and those eyes that +smiled with the artless tenderness of young flowers? + +Mamma Gerard, while laughing like the others, scolded her daughter a +little for her attack of feminine vanity, and then began to talk of +Madame Roger in order to change the conversation. + +Amedee did not cease to praise his friend. He told how affectionate he +was to his mother, how he resisted the military blood that burned in him, +how graceful he was, and how, at eighteen years, he did the honor of the +drawing-room and table with all the manner of a grand seigneur. + +Maria listened attentively. + +"You have promised to bring him here, Amedee," said the spoiled child, +with a serious air. "I should like very much to see him once." + +Amedee repeated his promise; but on his way to the Lycee, for his +afternoon class, he recalled the incident of the pretty maid and the name +of Zoe Mirilton, and, seized with some scruples, he asked himself whether +he ought to introduce his friend to the young Gerard girls. At first +this idea made him uneasy, then he thought that it was ridiculous. Was +not Maurice a good-hearted young man and well brought up? Had he not +seen him conduct himself with tact and reserve before Colonel Lantz's +daughters? + +Some days later Maurice reminded him of the promised visit to the +Gerards, and Amedee presented him to his old friends. + +Louise was not at home; she had been going about teaching for some time +to increase the family's resources, for the engraver was more red-faced +than ever, and obliged to change the number of his spectacles every year, +and could not do as much work as formerly. + +But the agreeable young man made a conquest of the rest of the family by +his exquisite good-nature and cordial, easy manner. Respectful and +simple with Madame Gerard, whom he intimidated a little, he paid very +little attention to Maria and did not appear to notice that he was +exciting her curiosity to the highest pitch. He modestly asked Father +Gerard's advice upon his project of painting, amusing himself with the +knickknacks about the apartments, picking out by instinct the best +engravings and canvases of value. The good man was enchanted with +Maurice and hastened to show him his private museum, forgetting all about +his pipe--he was smoking at present a Garibaldi--and presented him his +last engraving, where one saw--it certainly was a fatality that pursued +the old republican!--the Emperor Napoleon III, at Magenta, motionless +upon his horse in the centre of a square of grenadiers, cut down by grape +and canister. + +Maurice's visit was short, and as Amedee had thought a great deal about +little Maria for several days, he asked his friend, as he conducted him a +part of the way: + +"What did you think of her?" + +Maurice simply replied, "Delicious!" and changed the conversation. + + + + +CHAPTER VI + +DREAMS OF LOVE + +Solemn moment approached for the two friends. They were to take their +examinations for graduation. Upon the days when M. Violette--they now +called him at the office "Father Violette," he had grown so aged and +decrepit--was not too much "consoled" in the cafe in the Rue du Four, and +when he was less silent and gloomy than usual, he would say to his son, +after the soup: + +"Do you know, Amedee, I shall not be easy in my mind until you have +received your degree. Say what they may, it leads to everything." + +To everything indeed! M. Violette had a college friend upon whom all the +good marks had been showered, who, having been successively schoolmaster, +journalist, theatrical critic, a boarder in Mazas prison, insurance +agent, director of an athletic ring--he quoted Homer in his harangue--at +present pushed back the curtains at the entrance to the Ambigu, and +waited for his soup at the barracks gate, holding out an old tomato-can +to be filled. + +But M. Violette had no cause to fear! Amedee received his degree on the +same day with his friend Maurice, and both passed honorably. A little +old man with a head like a baboon--the scientific examiner--tried to make +Amedee flounder on the subject of nitrogen, but he passed all the same. +One can hope for everything nowadays. + +But what could Amedee hope for first? M. Violette thought of it when he +was not at his station at the Rue du Four. What could he hope for? +Nothing very great. + +Probably he could enter the ministry as an auxiliary. One hundred francs +a month, and the gratuities, would not be bad for a beginner! +M. Violette recalled his endless years in the office, and all the trouble +he had taken to guess a famous rebus that was celebrated for never having +been solved. Was Amedee to spend his youth deciphering enigmas? +M. Violette hoped for a more independent career for his son, if it were +possible. Commerce, for example! Yes! there was a future in commerce. +As a proof of it there was the grocer opposite him, a simpleton who +probably did not put the screws on enough and had just hanged himself +rather than go into bankruptcy. M. Violette would gladly see his son in +business. If he could begin with M. Gaufre? Why not? The young man +might become in the end his uncle's partner and make his fortune. M. +Violette spoke of it to Amedee. + +"Shall we go to see your uncle Sunday morning?" + +The idea of selling chasubles and Stations of the Cross did not greatly +please Amedee, who had concealed in his drawer a little book full of +sonnets, and had in his mind the plan of a romantic drama wherein one +would say "Good heavens!" and "My lord!" But first of all, he must +please his father. He was glad to observe that for some time M. Violette +had interested himself more in him, and had resisted his baneful habit +somewhat. The young man offered no resistance. The next day at noon he +presented himself at the Rue Servandoni, accompanied by his father. + +The "dealer in pious goods" received them with great good-humor. He had +just come from high mass and was about to sit down at the table. He even +invited them to follow his example and taste of his stewed kidneys, one +of Berenice's triumphs, who served the dinner with her hands loaded with +rings. The Violettes had dined, and the father made known his desire. + +"Yes," said Uncle Isidore, "Amedee might enter the house. Only you know, +Violette, it will be another education to be learned over again. He must +begin at the very beginning and follow the regular course. Oh! the boy +will not be badly treated! He may take his meals with us, is not that +so, Berenice? At first he would be obliged to run about a little, as I +did when I came from the province to work in the shop and tie up +parcels." + +M. Violette looked at his son and saw that he was blushing with shame. +The poor man understood his mistake. What good to have dazzled M. Patin +before the whole University by reciting, without hesitation, three verses +of Aristophanes, only to become a drudge and a packer? Well! so Amedee +would yawn over green boxes and guess at enigmas in the Illustration. +It had to be so. + +They took leave of Uncle Isidore. + +"We will reflect over it, Monsieur Gaufre, and will come to see you +again." + +But Berenice had hardly shut the door upon them when M. Violette said to +his son: + +"Nothing is to be expected of that old egotist. Tomorrow we will go to +see the chief of my department, I have spoken of you to him, at all +events." + +He was a good sort of fellow, this M. Courtet, who was head clerk, though +too conceited and starched up, certainly. His red rosette, as large as a +fifty-cent piece, made one's eyes blink, and he certainly was very +imprudent to stand so long backed up to the fireplace with limbs spread +apart, for it seemed that he must surely burn the seat of his trousers. +But no matter, he has stomach enough. He has noticed M. Violette's +pitiful decline--"a poor devil who never will live to be promoted." +Having it in his power to distribute positions, M. Courtet had reserved a +position for Amedee. In eight days the young man would be nominated an +auxiliary employe at fifteen hundred francs a year. It is promised and +done. + +Ugh! the sickening heat from the stove! the disgusting odor of musty +papers! However, Amedee had nothing to complain of; they might have +given him figures to balance for five hours at a time. He owed it to M. +Courtet's kindness, that he was put at once into the correspondence room. +He studied the formulas, and soon became skilful in official politeness. +He now knew the delicate shades which exist between "yours respectfully" +and "most respectfully yours;" and he measured the abyss which separates +an "agreeable" and "homage." + +To sum it all up, Amedee was bored, but he was not unhappy; for he had +time to dream. + +He went the longest way to the office in the morning, while seeking to +make "amour" rhyme with "jour" without producing an insipid thing; or +else he thought of the third act of his drama after the style of 1830, +and the grand love scene which should take place at the foot of the +Montfaucon gallows. In the evening he went to the Gerards, and they +seated themselves around--the lamp which stood on the dining-room table, +the father reading his journal, the women sewing. He chatted with Maria, +who answered him the greater part of the time without raising her eyes, +because she suspected, the coquette! that he admired her beautiful, +drooping lids. + +Amedee composed his first sonnets in her honor, and he adored her, of +course, but he was also in love with the Lantz young ladies, whom he saw +sometimes at Madame Roger's, and who each wore Sunday evenings roses in +her hair, which made them resemble those pantheons in sponge-cake that +pastry-cooks put in their windows on fete days. + +If Amedee had been presented to twelve thousand maidens successively, +they would have inspired twelve thousand wishes. There was the servant +of the family on the first floor, whose side-glance troubled him as he +met her on the staircase; and his heart sank every time he turned the +handle of the door of a shop in the Rue Bonaparte, where an insidious +clerk always forced him to choose ox-colored kid gloves, which he +detested. It must not be forgotten that Amedee was very young, and was +in love with love. + +He was so extremely timid that he never had had the audacity to tell the +girl at the glove counter that he preferred bronze-green gloves, nor the +boldness to show Maria Gerard his poems composed in her honor, in which +he now always put the plural "amours," so as to make it rhyme with +"toujours," which was an improvement. He never had dared to reply to the +glance of the little maid on the second floor; and he was very wrong to +be embarrassed, for one morning, as he passed the butcher's shop, he saw +the butcher's foreman put his arm about the girl's waist and whisper a +love speech over a fine sirloin roast. + +Sometimes, in going or coming from the office, Amedee would go to see his +friend Maurice, who had obtained from Madame Roger permission to install +himself in the Latin Quarter so as to be near the law school. + +In a very low-studded first-floor room in the Rue Monsieur-le-Prince, +Amedee perceived through a cloud of tobacco-smoke the elegant Maurice in +a scarlet jacket lying upon a large divan. Everything was rich and +voluptuous, heavy carpets, handsomely bound volumes of poems, an open +piano, and an odor of perfumery mingled with that of cigarettes. Upon +the velvet-covered mantel Mademoiselle Irma, the favorite of the master +of the apartment, had left the last fashionable novel, marking, with one +of her hairpins, where she had left off reading. Amedee spent a +delightful hour there. Maurice always greeted him with his joyful, +kind manner, in which one hardly minded the slight shade of patronage. +He walked up and down his room, expanding his finely moulded chest, +lighting and throwing away his cigarettes, seating himself for two +minutes at the piano and playing one of Chopin's sad strains, opening a +book and reading a page, showing his albums to his friend, making him +repeat some of his poems, applauding him and touching lightly upon +different subjects, and charming Amedee more and more by his grace and +manners. + +However, Amedee could not enjoy his friend much, as he rarely found him +alone. Every few moments--the key was in the door--Maurice's comrades, +young pleasure-seekers like himself, but more vulgar, not having his +gentlemanly bearing and manners, would come to talk with him of some +projected scheme or to remind him of some appointment for the evening. + +Often, some one of them, with his hat upon his head, would dash off a +polka, after placing his lighted cigar upon the edge of the piano. These +fast fellows frightened Amedee a little, as he had the misfortune to be +fastidious. + +After these visitors had left, Maurice would ask his friend to dinner, +but the door would open again, and Mademoiselle Irma, in her furs and +small veil--a comical little face--would enter quickly and throw her arms +about Amedee's neck, kissing him, while rumpling his hair with her gloved +hands. + +"Bravo! we will all three dine together." + +No! Amedee is afraid of Mademoiselle Irma, who has already thrown her +mantle upon the sofa and crowned the bronze Venus de Milo with her otter +toque. The young man excuses himself, he is expected at home. + +"Timid fellow, go!" said Maurice to him, as he conducted him to the +door, laughing. + +What longings! What dreams! They made up all of poor Amedee's life. +Sometimes they were sad, for he suffered in seeing his father indulge +himself more and more in his vice. No woman loved him, and he never had +one louis in his pocket for pleasure or liberty. But he did not +complain. His life was noble and happy! He smiled with pleasure as he +thought of his good friends; his heart beat in great throbs as he thought +of love; he wept with rapture over beautiful verses. The spectacle of +life, through hope and the ideal, seemed to him transfigured. Happy +Amedee! He was not yet twenty years old! + + + + +CHAPTER VII + +A GENTLE COUNSELLOR + +One sombre, misty, winter morning, as Amedee lingered in his bed, his +father entered, bringing him a letter that the wife of the concierge had +just brought up. The letter was from Maurice, inviting his friend to +dinner that evening at seven o'clock at Foyots, to meet some of his +former companions at the Lycee Henri IV. + +"Will you excuse me for not dining with you this evening, papa?" said +Amedee, joyfully. "Maurice Roger entertains us at a restaurant." + +The young man's gayety left him suddenly when he looked at his father, +who had seated himself on the side of the bed. He had become almost +frightful to look at; old before his time, livid of complexion, his eyes +bloodshot, the rebellious lock of hair straggling over his right temple. +Nothing was more heartbreaking than his senile smile when he placed his +bony trembling hands upon his thighs. Amedee, who knew, alas, why his +father had reached such a pass, felt his heart moved with pity and shame. + +"Are you suffering to-day?" asked the young man. "Would you prefer that +we should dine together as usual? I will send word to Maurice. Nothing +is easier." + +"No, my child, no!" replied M. Violette, in a hollow tone. "Go and +amuse yourself with your friends. I know perfectly well that the life +you lead with me is too monotonous. Go and amuse yourself, it will +please me--only there is an idea that troubles me more than usual--and +I want to confide it to you." + +"What is it then, dear papa?" + +"Amedee, last March your mother had been dead fifteen years. You hardly +knew her. She was the sweetest and best of creatures, and all that I can +wish you is, that you may meet such a woman, make her your companion for +life, and be more fortunate than I, my poor Amedee, and keep her always. +During these frightful years since your mother's death I have suffered, +do you see? suffered horribly, and I have never, never been consoled. +If I have lived--if I have had the strength to live, in spite of all, it +was only for you and in remembrance of her. I think I have nearly +finished my task. You are a young man, intelligent and honest, and you +have now an employment which will give you your bread. However, I often +ask myself--oh, very often--whether I have fulfilled my duty toward you. +Ah! do not protest," added the unhappy man, whom Amedee had clasped in +his arms. "No, my poor child, I have not loved you sufficiently; grief +has filled too large a place in my heart; above all, during these last +few years I have not been with you enough. I have sought solitude. You +understand me, Amedee, I can not tell you more," he said, with a sob. +"There are some parts of my life that you must ignore, and if it grieves +you to know what I have become during that time, you must never think of +it; forget it. I beg of you, my child, do not judge me severely. And +one of these days, if I die-ah! we must expect it--the burden of my +grief is too heavy for me to bear, it crushes me! Well, my child, if I +die, promise me to be indulgent to my memory, and when you think of your +father only say: 'He was very unhappy!'" + +Amedee shed tears upon his father's shoulder, who softly stroked his +son's beautiful hair with his trembling hands. + +"My father, my good father!" sobbed Amedee, "I love and respect you with +all my heart. I will dress myself quickly and we will go to the office +together; we will return the same way and dine like a pair of good +friends. I beg of you, do not ask me to leave you to-day!" + +But M. Violette suddenly arose as if he had formed some resolution. + +"No, Amedee," said he, firmly. "I have said what I had to say to you, +and you will remember it. That is sufficient. Go and amuse yourself +this evening with your friends. Sadness is dangerous at your age. As +for myself, I shall go to dine with Pere Bastide, who has just received +his pension, and has invited me more than twenty times to come and see +his little house at Grand Montrouge. It is understood; I wish it. Now +then, wipe your eyes and kiss me." + +Having tenderly embraced his son, M. Violette left the room. Amedee +could hear him in the vestibule take down his hat and cane, open and +close the door, and go down the stairs with a heavy step. A quarter of +an hour after, as the young man was crossing the Luxembourg to go to the +office, he met Louise Gerard with her roll of music in her hand, going to +give some lessons in the city. He walked a few steps beside her, and the +worthy girl noticed his red eyes and disturbed countenance. + +"What is the matter with you, Amedee?" she inquired, anxiously. + +"Louise," he replied, "do you not think that my father has changed very +much in the last few months?" + +She stopped and looked at him with eyes shining with compassion. + +"Very much changed, my poor Amedee. You would not believe me if I told +you that I had not remarked it. But whatever may be the cause--how shall +I say it?--that has affected your father's health, you should think of +only one thing, my friend; that is, that he has been tender and devoted +to you; that he became a widower very young and he did not remarry; that +he has endured, in order to devote himself to his only child, long years +of solitude and unhappy memories. You must think of that, Amedee, and +that only." + +"I never shall forget it, Louise, never fear; my heart is full of +gratitude. This morning, even, he was so affectionate and kind to me-- +but his health is ruined; he is now a weak old man. Soon--I not only +fear it, but I am certain of it--soon he will be incapable of work. +I can see his poor hands tremble now. He will not even have a right to a +pension. If he could not continue to work in the office he could hardly +obtain a meagre relief, and that by favor only. And for long years I can +only hope for an insufficient salary. Oh! to think that the catastrophe +draws near, that one of these days he may fall ill and become infirm, +perhaps, and that we shall be almost needy and I shall be unable to +surround him with care in his old age. That is what makes me tremble!" + +They walked along side by side upon the moist, soft ground of the large +garden, under the leafless trees, where hung a slight penetrating mist +which made them shiver under their wraps. + +"Amedee," said she, looking at the young man with a serious gentleness, +"I have known you from a child, and I am the elder. I am twenty-two; +that makes me almost an old maid, Amedee, and gives me the right to scold +you a little. You lack confidence in life, my friend, and it is wrong at +your age. Do you think I do not see that my father has aged very much, +that his eyesight fails, that we are much more cramped in circumstances +in the house than formerly? Are we any the more sad? Mamma makes fewer +little dishes and I teach in Paris, that is all. We live nearly the same +as before, and our dear Maria--she is the pet of us all, the joy and +pride of the house-well, our Maria, all the same, has from time to time a +new frock or a pretty hat. I have no experience, but it seems to me that +in order to feel really unhappy I must have nobody to love--that is the +only privation worth the trouble of noticing. Do you know that I have +just had one of the greatest pleasures of my life? I noticed that papa +did not smoke as much as usual, in order to be economical, poor man! +Fortunately I found a new pupil at Batignolles, and as soon as I had the +first month's pay in my pocket I bought a large package of tobacco and +put it beside his work. One must never complain so long as one is +fortunate enough to keep those one loves. I know the secret grief that +troubles you regarding your father; but think what he has suffered, that +he loves you, that you are his only consolation. And when you have +gloomy thoughts, come and see your old friends, Amedee. They will try to +warm your heart at the fireside of their friendship, and to give you some +of their courage, the courage of poor people which is composed of a +little indifference and a little resignation." + +They had reached the Florentine Terrace, where stand the marble statues +of queens and ladies, and on the other side of the balustrade, ornamented +with large vases, they could see through the mist the reservoir with its +two swans, the solitary gravel walks, the empty grass-plots of a pale +green, surrounded by the skeletons of lilac-trees, and the facade of the +old palace, whose clock-hands pointed to ten. + +"Let us hasten," said Louise, after a glance at the dial. "Escort me as +far at the Odeon omnibus. I am a little late." + +As he walked by her side he looked at her. Alas! Poor Louise was not +pretty, in spite of her large eyes, so loving but not coquettish. She +wore a close, ugly hat, a mantle drawn tightly about her shoulders, +colored gloves, and heavy walking-shoes. Yes, she was a perfect picture +of a "two francs an hour" music-teacher. What a good, brave girl! With +what an overflowing heart she had spoken of her family! It was to earn +tobacco for her father and a new frock for her pretty sister that she +left thus, so early in the misty morning, and rode in public conveyances, +or tramped through the streets of Paris in the mud. The sight of her, +more than what she said, gave the weak and melancholy Amedee courage and +desire for manly resolutions. + +"My dear Louise," said he, with emotion, "I am very fortunate to have +such a friend as you, and for so many years! Do you remember when we +used to have our hunts after the bearskin cap when we were children?" + +They had just left the garden and found themselves behind the Odeon. Two +tired-out omnibus horses, of a yellowish-white, and showing their ribs, +were rubbing their noses against each other like a caress; then the horse +on the left raised his head and placed it in a friendly way upon the +other's mane. Louise pointed to the two animals and said to Amedee, +smilingly: + +"Their fate is hard, is it not? No matter! they are good friends, and +that is enough to help them endure it." + +Then, shaking hands with Amedee, she climbed lightly up into the +carriage. + +All that day at the office Amedee was uneasy about his father, and about +four o'clock, a little before the time for his departure, he went to M. +Violette's office. There they told him that his father had just left, +saying that he would dine at Grand Montrouge with an old friend; and +Amedee, a trifle reassured, decided to rejoin his friend Maurice at the +Foyot restaurant. + + + + +CHAPTER VIII + +BUTTERFLIES AND GRASSHOPPERS + +Amedee was the first to arrive at the rendezvous. He had hardly +pronounced Maurice Roger's name when a voice like a cannon bellowed out, +"Now then! the yellow parlor!" and he was conducted into a room where a +dazzling table was laid by a young man, with a Yankee goatee and +whiskers, and the agility of a prestidigitateur. This frisky person +relieved Amedee at once of his hat and coat, and left him alone in the +room, radiant with lighted candles. + +Evidently it was to be a banquet. Piled up in the centre of the table +was a large dish of crayfish, and at each plate--there were five--were +groups of large and small glasses. + +Maurice came in almost immediately, accompanied by his other guests, +three young men dressed in the latest fashion, whom Amedee did not at +first recognize as his former comrades, who once wore wrinkled stockings +and seedy coats, and wore out with him the seats of their trousers on the +benches of the Lycee Henri IV. + +After the greetings, "What! is it you?" "Do you remember me?" and a +shaking of hands, they all seated themselves around the table. + +What! is that little dumpy fellow with the turned-up nose, straight as an +arrow and with such a satisfied air, Gorju, who wanted to be an actor? +He is one now, or nearly so, since he studies with Regnier at the +Conservatoire. A make-believe actor, he puts on airs, and in the three +minutes that he has been in the room he has looked at his retrousse nose +and his coarse face, made to be seen from a distance, ten times in the +mirror. His first care is to inform Amedee that he has renounced his +name Gorju, which was an impossible one for the theatre, and has taken +that of Jocquelet. Then, without losing a moment, he refers to his +"talents," "charms," and "physique." + +Who is this handsome fellow with such neat side-whiskers, whose finely +cut features suggest an intaglio head, and who has just placed a lawyer's +heavy portfolio upon the sofa? It is Arthur Papillon, the distinguished +Latin scholar who wished to organize a debating society at the Lycee, +and to divide the rhetoric class into groups and sub-groups like a +parliament. "What have you been doing, Papillon?" Papillon had studied +law, and was secretary of the Patru Conference, of course. + +Amedee immediately recognized the third guest. + +"What! Gustave!" exclaimed he, joyously. + +Yes! Gustave, the former "dunce," the one they had called "Good-luck" +because his father had made an immense fortune in guano. Not one bit +changed was Gustave! The same deep-set eyes and greenish complexion. +But what style! English from the tips of his pointed shoes to the +horseshoe scarfpin in his necktie. One would say that he was a horse- +jockey dressed in his Sunday best. What was this comical Gustave doing +now? Nothing. His father has made two hundred thousand pounds' income +dabbling in certain things, and Gustave is getting acquainted with that +is all--which means to wake up every morning toward noon, with a bitter +mouth caused from the last night's supper, and to be surprised every +morning at dawn at the baccarat table, after spending five hours saying +"Bac!" in a stifled, hollow voice. Gustave understands life, and, taking +into consideration his countenance like a death's-head, it may lead him +to make the acquaintance of something entirely different. But who thinks +of death at his age? Gustave wishes to know life, and when a fit of +coughing interrupts him in one of his idiotic bursts of laughter, his +comrades at the Gateux Club tell him that he has swallowed the wrong way. +Wretched Gustave, so be it! + +Meanwhile the boy with the juggler's motions appeared with the soup, +and made exactly the same gestures when he uncovered the tureen as Robert +Houdin would have made, and one was surprised not to see a bunch of +flowers or a live rabbit fly out. But no! it was simply soup, and the +guests attacked it vigorously and in silence. After the Rhine wine all +tongues were unloosened, and as soon as they had eaten the Normandy sole- +oh! what glorious appetites at twenty years of age!--the five young men +all talked at once. What a racket! Exclamations crossed one another +like rockets. Gustave, forcing his weak voice, boasted of the +performances of a "stepper" that he had tried that morning in the Allee +des Cavaliers. He would have been much better off had he stayed in his +bed and taken cod-liver oil. Maurice called out to the boy to uncork the +Chateau-Leoville. Amedee, having spoken of his drama to the comedian +Gorju, called Jocquelet, that person, speaking in his bugle-like voice +that came through his bugle-shaped nose, set himself up at once as a man +of experience, giving his advice, and quoting, with admiration, Talma's +famous speech to a dramatic poet: "Above all, no fine verses!" Arthur +Papillon, who was destined for the courts, thought it an excellent time +to lord it over the tumult of the assembly himself, and bleated out a +speech of Jules Favre that he had heard the night before in the +legislative assembly. + +The timid Amedee was defeated at the start in this melee of conversation. +Maurice also kept silent, with a slightly disdainful smile under his +golden moustache, and an attack of coughing soon disabled Gustave. +Alone, like two ships in line who let out, turn by turn, their volleys, +the lawyer and the actor continued their cannonading. Arthur Papillon, +who belonged to the Liberal opposition and wished that the Imperial +government should come around to "a pacific and regular movement of +parliamentary institutions," was listened to for a time, and explained, +in a clear, full voice the last article in the 'Courrier du Dimanche'. +But, bursting out in his terrible voice, which seemed like all of +Gideon's trumpets blowing at once, the comedian took up the offensive, +and victoriously declared a hundred foolish things--saying, for example, +that the part of Alceste should be made a comic one; making fun of +Shakespeare and Hugo, exalting Scribe, and in spite of his profile and +hooked nose, which should have opened the doors of the Theatre-Francais +and given him an equal share for life in its benefits, he affirmed that +he intended to play lovers' parts, and that he meant to assume the +responsibility of making "sympathetic" the role of Nero, in Britannicus. + +This would have become terribly tiresome, but for the entrance upon the +scene of some truffled partridges, which the juggler carved and +distributed in less time than it would take to shuffle a pack of cards. +He even served the very worst part of the bird to the simple Amedee, as +he would force him to choose the nine of spades. Then he poured out the +chambertin, and once more all heads became excited, and the conversation +fell, as was inevitable, upon the subject of women. + +Jocquelet began it, by speaking the name of one of the prettiest +actresses in Paris. He knew them all and described them exactly, +detailing their beauties like a slave-dealer. + +"So little Lucille Prunelle is a friend of the great Moncontour--" + +"Pardon me," interrupted Gustave, who was looking badly, "she has already +left him for Cerfbeer the banker." + +"I say she has not." + +"I say that she has." + +They would have quarrelled if Maurice, with his affable, bantering air, +had not attacked Arthur Papillon on the subject of his love-affairs; for +the young advocate drank many cups of Orleanist tea, going even into the +same drawing-rooms as Beule and Prevost-Paradol, and accompanying +political ladies to the receptions at the Academie Francaise. + +"That is where you must make havoc, you rascal!" + +But Papillon defends himself with conceited smiles and meaning looks. +According to him--and he puts his two thumbs into the armholes of his +vest--the ambitious must be chaste. + +"Abstineo venere," said he, lowering his eyes in a comical manner, for he +did not fear Latin quotations. However, he declared himself very hard to +please in that matter; he dreamed of an Egeria, a superior mind. What he +did not tell them was, that a dressmaker's little errand-girl, with whom +he had tried to converse as he left the law-school, had surveyed him from +head to foot and threatened him with the police. + +Upon some new joke of Maurice's, the lawyer gave his amorous programme in +the following terms: + +"Understand me, a woman must be as intelligent as Hypatia, and have the +sensibility of Heloise; the smile of a Joconde, and the limbs of an +Antiope; and, even then, if she had not the throat of a Venus de Medicis, +I should not love her." + +Without going quite so far, the actor showed himself none the less +exacting. According to his ideas, Deborah, the tragedienne at the Odeon +--a Greek statue!--had too large hands, and the fascinating Blanche +Pompon at the Varietes was a mere wax doll. + +Gustave, after all, was the one who is most intractable; excited by the +Bordeaux wine--a glass of mineral water would be best for him--he +proclaimed that the most beautiful creature was agreeable to him only for +one day; that it was a matter of principle, and that he had never made +but one exception, in favor of the illustrious dancer at the Casino +Cadet, Nina l'Auvergnate, because she was so comical! "Oh! my friends, +she is so droll, she is enough to kill one!" + +"To kill one!" Yes! my dear Monsieur Gustave, that is what will happen +to you one of these fine mornings, if you do not decide to lead a more +reasonable life--and on the condition that you pass your winters in the +South, also! + +Poor Amedee was in torture; all his illusions--desires and sentiments +blended--were cruelly wounded. Then, he had just discovered a deplorable +faculty; a new cause for being unhappy. The sight of this foolishness +made him suffer. How these coarse young men lied! Gustave seemed to him +a genuine idiot, Arthur Papillon a pedant, and as to Jocquelet, he was as +unbearable as a large fly buzzing between the glass and the curtain of a +nervous man's room. Fortunately, Maurice made a little diversion by +bursting into a laugh. + +"Well, my friends, you are all simpletons," he exclaimed. "I am not like +you, thank fortune! I do not sputter over my soup. Long life to women! +Yes, all of them, pretty and otherwise! For, upon my word, there are no +ugly ones. I do not notice that Miss Keepsake has feet like the English, +and I forget the barmaid's ruddy complexion, if she is attractive +otherwise. Now do not talk in this stupid fashion, but do as I do; +nibble all the apples while you have teeth. Do you know the reason why, +at the moment that I am talking to the lady of the house, I notice the +nose of the pretty waitress who brings in a letter on a salver? Do you +know the reason why, just as I am leaving Cydalize's house, who has put +a rose in my buttonhole, that I turn my head at the passing of Margoton, +who is returning from the market with a basket upon her arm? It is +because it is one other of my children. One other! that is a great +word! Yes, one thousand and three. Don Juan was right. I feel his +blood coursing in my veins. And now the boy shall uncork some champagne, +shall he not? to drink to the health of love!" + +Maurice was cynical, but this exposition of his philosophy served a good +purpose all the same. Everybody applauded him. The prestidigitateur, +who moved about the table like a schoolboy in a monkey-house, drew the +cork from a bottle of Roederer--it was astonishing that fireworks did not +dart out of it--and good-humor was restored. It reigned noisily until +the end of the repast, when the effect was spoiled by that fool of a +Gustave. He insisted upon drinking three glasses of kummel--why had they +not poured in maple sirup?--and, imagining that Jocquelet looked at him +askance, he suddenly manifested the intention of cutting his head open +with the carafe. The comedian, who was very pale, recalled all the +scenes of provocation that he had seen in the theatre; he stiffened in +his chair, swelled out his chest, and stammered, "At your orders!" +trying to "play the situation." But it was useless. + +Gustave, restrained by Maurice and Amedee, and as drunk as a Pole, +responded to his friend's objurgations by a torrent of tears, and fell +under the table, breaking some of the dishes. + +"Now, then, we must take the baby home," said Maurice, signing to the +boy. In the twinkling of an eye the human rag called Gustave was lifted +into a chair, clothed in his topcoat and hat, dressed and spruced up, +pushed down the spiral staircase, and landed in a cab. Then the +prestidigitateur returned and performed his last trick by making the +plate disappear upon which Maurice had thrown some money to pay the bill. + +It was not far from eleven o'clock when the comrades shook hands, in a +thick fog, in which the gaslights looked like the orange pedlers' paper +lanterns. Ugh! how damp it was! + +"Good-by." + +"I will see you again soon." + +"Good-night to the ladies." + +Arthur Papillon was in evening dress and white cravat, his customary +attire every evening, and still had time to show himself in a political +salon on the left side, where he met Moichod, the author of that famous +Histoire de Napoleon, in which he proves that Napoleon was only a +mediocre general, and that all his battles were gained by his +lieutenants. Jocquelet wished to go to the Odeon and hear, for the tenth +time, the fifth act of a piece of the common-sense school, in which the +hero, after haranguing against money for four acts in badly rhymed verse, +ends by marrying the young heiress, to the great satisfaction of the +bourgeois. As to Maurice, before he went to rejoin Mademoiselle Irma at +the Rue Monsieur-le-Prince, he walked part of the way with Amedee. + +"These comrades of ours are a little stupid, aren't they?" said he to +his friend. + +"I must say that they almost disgust me," replied the young man. +"Their brutal way of speaking of women and love wounded me, and you too, +Maurice. So much the worse! I will be honest; you, who are so refined +and proud, tell me that you did not mean what you said--that you made a +pretence of vice just to please the others. It is not possible that you +are content simply to gratify your appetite and make yourself a slave to +your passions. You ought to have a higher ideal. Your conscience must +reproach you." + +Maurice brusquely interrupted this tirade, laughing in advance at what he +was about to say. + +"My conscience? Oh, tender and artless Violette; Oh, modest wood-flower! +Conscience, my poor friend, is like a Suede glove, you can wear it +soiled. Adieu! We will talk of this another day, when Mademoiselle Irma +is not waiting for me." + +Amedee walked on alone, shivering in the mist, weary and sad, to the Rue +Notre-Dame-des-Champs. + +No! it could not be true. There must be another love than that known to +these brutes. There were other women besides the light creatures they +had spoken of. His thoughts reverted to the companion of his childhood, +to the pretty little Maria, and again he sees her sewing near the family +lamp, and talking with him without raising her eyes, while he admires her +beautiful, drooping lashes. He is amazed to think that this delicious +child's presence has never given him the slightest uneasiness; that he +has never thought of any other happiness than that of being near her. +Why should not a love like that he has dreamed of some day spring up in +her own heart? Have they not grown up together? Is he not the only +young man that she knows intimately? What happiness to become her +fiancee! Yes, it was thus that one should love! Hereafter he would flee +from all temptations; he would pass all his evenings with the Gerards; +he would keep as near as possible to his dear Maria, content to hear her +speak, to see her smile; and he would wait with a heart full of +tenderness for the moment when she would consent to become his wife. +Oh! the exquisite union of two chaste beings! the adorable kiss of +two innocent mouths! Did such happiness really exist? + +This beautiful dream warmed the young man's heart, and he reached his +home joyous and happy. He gave a vigorous pull to the bell, climbed +quickly up the long flights of stairs and opened the door to their +apartment. But what was this? His father must have come home very late, +for a stream of light shines under the door of his sleeping-room. + +"Poor man!" thought Amedee, recalling the scene of the morning. +"He may be ill. Let us see." + +He had hardly opened the door, when he drew back uttering a shriek of +horror and distress. By the light of a candle that burned upon the +mantel, Amedee had caught sight of his father extended upon the floor, +his shirt disordered and covered with blood, holding in his clenched +right hand the razor with which he had cut his throat. + +Yes! the union of two loving hearts had at last taken place. Their love +was happiness on earth; but if one of the two dies the other can never be +consoled while life lasts. + +M. Violette never was consoled. + + + + +CHAPTER IX + +THORNS OF JEALOUSY + +Now Amedee had no family. The day after his father's death he had a +violent rupture with M. Isidore Gaufre. Under the pretext that a suicide +horrified him, he allowed his niece's husband to be carried to the +cemetery in a sixth-class hearse, and did not honor with his presence +the funeral, which was even prohibited from using the parish road. +But the saintly man was not deterred from swallowing for his dinner that +same day, while thundering against the progress of materialism, tripe +cooked after the Caen fashion, one of Berenice's weekly works of art. + +Amedee had now no family, and his friends were dispersed. As a reward +for passing his examinations in law, Madame Roger took her son with her +on a trip to Italy, and they had just left France together. + +As to the poor Gerards, just one month after M. Violette's death, the old +engraver died suddenly, of apoplexy, at his work; and on that day there +were not fifty francs in the house. Around the open grave where they +lowered the obscure and honest artist, there was only a group of three +women, in black, who were weeping, and Amedee in mourning for his father, +with a dozen of Gerard's old comrades, whose romantic heads had become +gray. The family was obliged to sell at once, in order to get a little +money, what remained of proof-sheets in the boxes, some small paintings, +old presents from artist friends who had become celebrated, and the last +of the ruined knickknacks--indeed, all that constituted the charm of the +house. Then, in order that her eldest daughter might not be so far from +the boarding-school where she was employed as teacher of music, Madame +Gerard went to live in the Rue St.-Pierre, in Montmartre, where they +found a little cheap, first-floor apartment, with a garden as large as +one's hand. + +Now that he was reduced to his one hundred and twenty-five francs, Amedee +was obliged to leave his too expensive apartment in the Rue Notre-Dame- +des-Champs, and to sell the greater part of his family furniture. He +kept only his books and enough to furnish his little room, perched under +the roof of an old house in the Faubourg St.-Jacques. + +It was far from Montmartre, so he could not see his friends as often as +he would have liked, those friends whom grief in common had made dearer +than ever to him. One single consolation remained for him--literary +work. He threw himself into it blindly, deadening his sorrow with the +fruitful and wonderful opiate of poetry and dreams. However, he had now +begun to make headway, feeling that he had some thing new to say. He had +long ago thrown into the fire his first poems, awkward imitations of +favorite authors, also his drama after the style of 1830, where the two +lovers sang a duet at the foot of the scaffold. He returned to truth and +simplicity by the longest way, the schoolboy's road. Taste and +inclination both induced him to express simply and honestly what he saw +before him; to express, so far as he could, the humble ideal of the poor +people with whom he had lived in the melancholy Parisian suburbs where +his infancy was passed; in a word, to paint from nature. He tried, +feeling that he could succeed; and in those days lived the most beautiful +and perfect hours of his life--those in which the artist, already master +of his instrument, having still the abundance and vivacity of youthful +sensations, writes the first words that he knows to be good, and writes +them with entire disinterestedness, not even thinking that others will +see them; working for himself alone and for the sole joy of putting in +visible form and spreading abroad his ideas, his thoughts-all his heart. +Those moments of pure enthusiasm and perfect happiness he never could +know again, even after he had nibbled at the savory food of success and +had experienced the feverish desire for glory. Delicious hours they +were, and sacred, too, such as can only be compared to the divine +intoxication of first love. + +Amedee worked courageously during the winter months that followed his +father's death. He arose at six o'clock in the morning, lighted his lamp +and the little stove which heated his room, and, walking up and down, +leaning over his page, the poet would vigorously begin his struggle with +fancies, ideas, and words. At nine o'clock he would go out and breakfast +at a neighboring creamery; after which he would go to his office. There, +his tiresome papers once written, he had two or three hours of leisure, +which he employed in reading and taking notes from the volumes borrowed +by him every morning at a reading-room on the Rue Rorer-Collard; for he +had already learned that one leaves college almost ignorant, having, at +best, only learned how to study. He left the office at nightfall and +reached his room through the Boulevard des Invalides, and Montparnasse, +which at this time was still planted with venerable elms; sometimes the +lamplighter would be ahead of him, making the large gas-jets shoot out +under the leafless old trees. This walk, that Amedee imposed upon +himself for health's sake, would bring him, about six o'clock, a +workman's appetite for his dinner,--in the little creamery situated in +front of Val-de-Grace, where he had formed the habit of going. Then he +would return to his garret, and relight his stove and lamp, and work +until midnight. This ardent, continuous effort, this will-tension kept +in his mind the warmth, animation, and excitement indispensable for +poetical production. His mind expanded rapidly, ready to receive the +germs that were blown to him by the mysterious winds of inspiration. +At times he was astonished to see his pen fill the sheet so rapidly that +he would stop, filled with pride at having thus reduced to obedience +words and rhythms, and would ask himself what supernatural power had +permitted him to arm these divine wild birds. + +On Sundays, he had his meals brought him by the concierge, working all +day and not going out until nearly five o'clock in the afternoon, to dine +with Mamma Gerard. It was the only distraction that he allowed himself, +or rather the only recompense that he permitted himself. He walked +halfway across Paris to buy a cake in the Rue Fontaine for their dessert; +then he climbed without fatigue, thanks to his young legs, to the top of +Montmartre, lighted by swinging lamps, where one could almost believe +one's self in the distant corner of some province. They would be waiting +for him to serve the soup, and the young man would seat himself between +the widow and the two orphans. + +Alas, how hard these poor ladies' lives had become! Damourette, a member +of the Institute, remembered that he had once joked in the studios with +Gerard, and obtained a small annual pension for the widow; but it was +charity--hardly enough to pay the rent. Fortunately Louise, who already +looked like an old maid at twenty-three, going about the city all day +with her roll of music under her black shawl, had many pupils, and more +than twenty houses had well-nigh become uninhabitable through her +exertions with little girls, whose red hands made an unendurable racket +with their chromatic scales. Louise's earnings constituted the surest +part of their revenue. What a strange paradox is the social life in +large cities, where Weber's Last Waltz will bring the price of a four- +pound loaf of bread, and one pays the grocer with the proceeds of +Boccherini's Minuet! + +In spite of all, they had hard work to make both ends meet at the +Gerards. The pretty Maria wished to make herself useful and aid her +mother and sister. She had always shown great taste for drawing, and her +father used to give her lessons in pastel. Now she went to the Louvre to +work, and tried to copy the Chardins and Latours. She went there alone. +It was a little imprudent, she was so pretty; but Louise had no time to +go with her, and her mother had to be at home to attend to the housework +and cooking. Maria's appearance had already excited the hearts of +several young daubers. There were several cases of persistent sadness +and loss of appetite in Flandrin's studio; and two of Signol's pupils, +who were surprised hovering about the young artist, were hated secretly +as rivals; certain projects of duels, after the American fashion, were +profoundly considered. To say that Maria was not a little flattered to +see all these admirers turn timidly and respectfully toward her; to +pretend that she took off her hat and hung it on one corner of her easel +because the heat from the furnace gave her neuralgia and not to show her +beautiful hair, would be as much of a lie as a politician's promise. +However, the little darling was very serious, or at least tried to be. +She worked conscientiously and made some progress. Her last copy of the +portrait of that Marquise who holds a pug dog in her lap, with a ribbon +about his neck, was not very bad. This copy procured a piece of good +luck for the young artist. + +Pere Issacar, a bric-a-brac merchant on the Quay Voltairean--an old- +fashioned Jew with a filthy overcoat, the very sight of which made one +long to tear it off--approached Maria one day, just as she was about to +sketch a rose in the Marquise's powdered wig, and after raising a hat +greasy enough to make the soup for a whole regiment, said to her: + +"Matemoiselle, vould you make me von dozen vamily bordraits?" + +The young girl did not at first understand his abominable language, but +at last he made her comprehend. + +Every thing is bought nowadays, even rank, provided, of course, that one +has a purse sufficiently well filled. Nothing is simpler! In return for +a little money you can procure at the Vatican--second corridor on your +right, third door at the left--a brand-new title of Roman Count. A +heraldic agency--see advertisement--will plant and make grow at your will +a genealogical tree, under whose shade you can give a country breakfast +to twenty-five people. You buy a castle with port-holes--port-holes are +necessary--in a corner of some reactionary province. You call upon the +lords of the surrounding castles with a gold fleur-de-lys in your cravat. +You pose as an enraged Legitimist and ferocious Clerical. You give +dinners and hunting parties, and the game is won. I will wager that your +son will marry into a Faubourg St.-Germain family, a family which +descends authentically from the Crusaders. + +In order to execute this agreeable buffoonery, you must not forget +certain accessories--particularly portraits of your ancestors. They +should ornament the castle walls where you regale the country nobles. +One must use tact in the selection of this family gallery. There must be +no exaggeration. Do not look too high. Do not claim as a founder of +your race a knight in armor hideously painted, upon wood, with his coat +of arms in one corner of the panel. Bear in mind the date of chivalry. +Be satisfied with the head of a dynasty whose gray beard hangs over a +well-crimped ruff. I saw a very good example of that kind the other day +on the Place Royale. A dog was just showing his disrespect for it as I +passed. You can obtain an ancestor like this in the outskirts of the +city for fifteen francs, if you haggle a little. Or you need not give +yourself so much trouble. Apply to a specialist, Pere Issacar, for +instance. He will procure magnificent ancestors for you; not dear +either! If you will consent to descend to simple magistrates, the price +will be insignificant. Chief justices are dirt cheap. Naturally, if you +wish to be of the military profession, to have eminent clergy among your +antecedents, the price increases. Pere Issacar is the only one who can +give you, at a reasonable rate, ermine-draped bishops, or a colonel with +a Louis XIV wig, and, if you wish it, a blue ribbon and a breast-plate +under his red coat. What produces a good effect in a series of family +portraits is a series of pastels. What would you say to a goggle-eyed +abbe, or an old lady indecently decolletee, or a captain of dragoons +wearing a tigerskin cap (it is ten francs more if he has the cross of St. +Louis)? Pere Issacar knows his business, and always has in reserve +thirty of these portraits in charming frames of the period, made +expressly for him in the Faubourg St.-Antoine, and which have all been +buried fifteen days and riddled with shot, in order to have the musty +appearance and indispensable worm holes. + +You can understand now why the estimable Jew, in passing through the +Louvre for his weekly promenade, took an interest in little Maria copying +the charming Marquise de Latour. He was just at this time short of +powdered marquises, and they are always very much in demand. He begged +the young woman to take her copy home and make twelve more of it, +varying, only the color of the dress and some particular detail in each +portrait. Thus, instead of the pug dog, marquise No. 2 would hold a King +Charles spaniel, No. 2 a monkey, No. 3 a bonbon box, No. 4 a fan. The +face could remain the same. All marquises looked alike to Pere Issacar; +he only exacted that they should all be provided with two black patches, +one under the right eye, the other on the left shoulder. This he +insisted upon, for the patch, in his eyes, was a symbol of the eighteenth +century. + +Pere Issacar was a fair man and promised to furnish frames, paper, and +pastels, and to pay the young girl fifteen francs for each marquise. +What was better yet, he promised, if he was pleased with the first work, +to order of the young artist a dozen canonesses of Remiremont and a half- +dozen of royal gendarmes. + +I wish you could have seen those ladies when Maria went home to tell the +good news. Louise had just returned from distributing semiquavers in the +city; her eyes and poor Mother Gerard's were filled with tears of joy. + +"What, my darling, "said the mother, embracing her child, "are you going +to trouble yourself about our necessaries of life, too?" + +"Do you see this little sister?" said Louise, laughing cordially. +"She is going to earn a pile of money as large as she is herself. Do you +know that I am jealous--I, with my piano and my displeasing profession? +Good-luck to pastel! It is not noisy, it will not annoy the neighbors, +and when you are old you can say, 'I never have played for anybody.'" + +But Maria did not wish them to joke. They had always treated her like a +doll, a spoiled child, who only knew how to curl her hair and tumble her +frocks. Well, they should see! + +When Amedee arrived on Sunday with his cake, they told him over several +times the whole story, with a hundred details, and showed him the two +marquises that Maria had already finished, who wore patches as large as +wafers. + +She appeared that day more attractive and charming than ever to the young +man, and it was then that he conceived his first ambition. If he only +had enough talent to get out of his obscurity and poverty, and could +become a famous writer and easily earn his living! It was not +impossible, after all. Oh, with what pleasure he would ask this +exquisite child to be his wife! How sweet it would be to know that she +was happy with, and proud of, him! But he must not think of it now, +they were too poor; and then, would Maria love him? + +He often asked himself that question, and with uneasiness. In his own +heart he felt that the childish intimacy had become a sincere affection, +a real love. He had no reason to hope that the same transformation had +taken place in the young girl's heart. She always treated him very +affectionately, but rather like a good comrade, and she was no more +stirred by his presence now than she was when she had lain in wait with +him behind the old green sofa to hunt Father Gerard's battered fur hat. + +Amedee had most naturally taken the Gerard family into his confidence +regarding his work. After the Sunday dinner they would seat themselves +around the table where Mamma Gerard had just served the coffee, and the +young man would read to his friends, in a grave, slow voice, the poem he +had composed during the week. A painter having the taste and inclination +for interior scenes, like the old masters of the Dutch school, would have +been stirred by the contemplation of this group of four persons in +mourning. The poet, with his manuscript in his right hand and marking +the syllables with a rhythmical movement of his left, was seated between +the two sisters. But while Louise--a little too thin and faded for her +years--fixes her attentive eyes upon the reader and listens with avidity, +the pretty Maria is listless and sits with a bored little face, gazing +mechanically at the other side of the table. Mother Gerard knits with a +serious air and her spectacles perched upon the tip of her nose. + +Alas! during these readings Louise was the only one who heaved sighs of +emotion; and sometimes even great tear-drops would tremble upon her +lashes. She was the only one who could find just the right delicate word +with which to congratulate the poet, and show that she had understood and +been touched by his verses. At the most Maria would sometimes accord the +young poet, still agitated by the declamation of his lines, a careless +"It is very pretty!" with a commonplace smile of thanks. + +She did not care for poetry, then? Later, if he married her, would she +remain indifferent to her husband's intellectual life, insensible even to +the glory that he might reap? How sad it was for Amedee to have to ask +himself that question! + +Soon Maria inspired a new fear within him. Maurice and his mother had +been already three months in Italy, and excepting two letters that he had +received from Milan, at the beginning of his journey, in the first flush +of his enthusiasm, Amedee had had no news from his friend. He excused +this negligence on the part of the lazy Maurice, who had smilingly told +him, on the eve of departure, not to count upon hearing from him +regularly. At each visit that Amedee paid the Gerards, Maria always +asked him: + +"Have you received any news from your friend Maurice?" + +At first he had paid no attention to this, but her persistency at length +astonished him, planting a little germ of suspicion and alarm in his +heart. Maurice Roger had only paid the Gerards a few visits during the +father's lifetime, and accompanied on each occasion by Amedee. He had +always observed the most respectful manner toward Maria, and they had +perhaps exchanged twenty words. Why should Maria preserve such a +particular remembrance of a person so nearly a stranger to her? Was it +possible that he had made a deep impression, perhaps even inspired a +sentiment of love? Did she conceal in the depths of her heart, when she +thought of him, a tender hope? Was she watching for him? Did she wish +him to return? + +When these fears crossed Amedee's mind, he felt a choking sensation, and +his heart was troubled. Happy Maurice, who had only to be seen to +please! But immediately, with a blush of shame, the generous poet chased +away this jealous fancy. But every Sunday, when Maria, lowering her +eyes, and with a slightly embarrassed voice, repeated her question, "Have +you received any news from Monsieur Maurice?" Amedee felt a cruelly +discouraged feeling, and thought, with deep sadness: + +"She never will love me!" + +To conquer this new grief, he plunged still more deeply into work; but he +did not find his former animation and energy. After the drizzling rain +of the last days of March, the spring arrived. Now, when Amedee awoke, +it was broad daylight at six o'clock in the morning. Opening his mansard +window, he admired, above the tops of the roofs, the large, ruddy sun +rising in the soft gray sky, and from the convent gardens beneath came a +fresh odor of grass and damp earth. Under the shade of the arched +lindens which led to the shrine of a plaster Virgin, a first and almost +imperceptible rustle, a presentiment of verdure, so to speak, ran +through the branches, and the three almond trees in the kitchen-garden +put forth their delicate flowers. The young poet was invaded by a sweet +and overwhelming languor, and Maria's face, which was commonly before his +inner vision upon awakening, became confused and passed from his mind. +He seated himself for a moment before a table and reread the last lines +of a page that he had begun; but he was immediately overcome by physical +lassitude, and abandoned himself to thought, saying to himself that he +was twenty years old, and that it would be very good, after all, to enjoy +life. + + + + +CHAPTER X + +A BUDDING POET + +It is the first of May, and the lilacs in the Luxembourg Gardens are in +blossom. It has just struck four o'clock. The bright sun and the pure +sky have rendered more odious than ever the captivity of the office to +Amedee, and he departs before the end of the sitting for a stroll in the +Medicis garden around the pond, where, for the amusement of the children +in that quarter, a little breeze from the northeast is pushing on a +miniature flotilla. Suddenly he hears himself called by a voice which +bursts out like a brass band at a country fair. + +"Good-day, Violette." + +It is Jocquelet, the future comedian, with his turned-up nose, which cuts +the air like the prow of a first-class ironclad, superb, triumphant, +dressed like a Brazilian, shaved to the quick, the dearest hope of +Regnier's class at the Conservatoire-Jocquelet, who has made an enormous +success in an act from the "Precieuses," at the last quarter's +examination--he says so himself, without any useless modesty--Jocquelet, +who will certainly have the first comedy prize at the next examination, +and will make his debut with out delay at the Comedie Francaise! All +this he announces in one breath, like a speech learned by heart, with his +terrible voice, like a quack selling shaving-paste from a gilded +carriage. In two minutes that favorite word of theatrical people had +been repeated thirty times, punctuating the phrases: "I! I! I! I!" + +Amedee is only half pleased at the meeting. Jocquelet was always a +little too noisy to please him. After all, he was an old comrade, and +out of politeness the poet congratulated him upon his success. + +Jocquelet questioned him. What was Amedee doing? What had become of +him? Where was his literary work? All this was asked with such +cordiality and warmth of manner that one would have thought that +Jocquelet was interested in Amedee, and had a strong friendship for him. +Nothing of the, sort. Jocquelet was interested in only one person in +this world, and that person was named Jocquelet. One is either an actor +or he is not. This personage was always one wherever he was--in an +omnibus, while putting on his suspenders, even with the one he loved. +When he said to a newcomer, "How do you do?" he put so much feeling into +this very original question, that the one questioned asked himself +whether he really had not just recovered from a long and dangerous +illness. Now, at this time Jocquelet found himself in the presence of an +unknown and poor young poet. What role ought such an eminent person as +himself to play in such circumstances? To show affection for the young +man, calm his timidity, and patronize him without too much haughtiness; +that was the position to take, and Jocquelet acted it. + +Amedee was an artless dupe, and, touched by the interest shown him, he +frankly replied: + +"Well, my dear friend, I have worked hard this winter. I am not +dissatisfied. I think that I have made some progress; but if you knew +how hard and difficult it is!" + +He was about to confide to Jocquelet the doubts and sufferings of a +sincere artist, but Jocquelet, as we have said, thought only of himself, +and brusquely interrupted the young poet: + +"You do not happen to have a poem with you--something short, a hundred or +a hundred and fifty lines--a poem intended for effect, that one could +recite?" + +Amedee had copied out that very day, at the office, a war story, a heroic +episode of Sebastopol that he had heard Colonel Lantz relate not long +since at Madame Roger's, and had put into verse with a good French +sentiment and quite the military spirit, verse which savored of powder, +and went off like reports of musketry. He took the sheets out of his +pocket, and, leading the comedian into a solitary by-path of sycamores +which skirted the Luxembourg orangery, he read his poem to him in a low +voice. Jocquelet, who did not lack a certain literary instinct, was very +enthusiastic, for he foresaw a success for himself, and said to the poet: + +"You read those verses just like a poet, that is, very badly. But no +matter, this battle is very effective, and I see what I could do with it- +with my voice. But what do you mean?" added he, planting himself in +front of his friend. "Do you write verses like these and nobody knows +anything about them? It is absurd. Do you wish, then, to imitate +Chatterton? That is an old game, entirely used up! You must push +yourself, show yourself. I will take charge of that myself! Your +evening is free, is it not? Very well, come with me; before six o'clock +I shall have told your name to twenty trumpeters, who will make all Paris +resound with the news that there is a poet in the Faubourg Saint-Jacques. +I will wager, you savage, that you never have put your foot into the Cafe +de Seville. Why, my dear fellow, it is our first manufactory of fame! +Here is the Odeon omnibus, get on! We shall be at the Boulevard +Montmartre in twenty minutes, and I shall baptize you there, as a great +man, with a glass of absinthe." + +Dazzled and carried away, Amedee humored him and climbed upon the outside +of the omnibus with his comrade. The vehicle hurried them quickly along +toward the quay, crossed the Seine, the Carrousel, and passed before the +Theatre-Francais, at which Jocquelet, thinking of his approaching debut, +shook his fist, exclaiming, "Now I am ready for you!" Here the young men +were planted upon the asphalt boulevard, in front of the Cafe de Seville. + +Do not go to-day to see this old incubator, in which so many political +and literary celebrities have been hatched; for you will only find a +cafe, just like any other, with its groups of ugly little Jews who +discuss the coming races, and here and there a poor creature, painted +like a Jezebel, dying of chagrin over her pot of beer. + +At the decline of the Second Empire--it was May 1, 1866, that Amedee +Violette entered there for the first time--the Cafe de, Seville passed +for, and with reason too, one of the most remarkable places in Paris. +For this glorious establishment had furnished by itself, or nearly so, +the eminent staff of our third Republic! Be honest, Monsieur le Prefet, +you who presided at the opening of the agricultural meeting in our +province, and who played the peacock in your dress-coat, embroidered in +silver, before an imposing line of horned creatures; be honest and admit, +that, at the time when you opposed the official candidates in your +democratic journal, you had your pipe in the rack of the Cafe de Seville, +with your name in white enamel upon the blackened bowl! Remember, +Monsieur le Depute, you who voted against all the exemption cases of the +military law, remember who, in this very place, at your daily game of +dominoes for sixty points, more than a hundred times ranted against the +permanent army--you, accustomed to the uproar of assemblies and the noise +of the tavern--contributed to the parliamentary victories by crying, "Six +all! count that!" And you too, Monsieur le Ministre, to whom an office- +boy, dating from the tyrants, still says, "Your excellency," without +offending you; you also have been a constant frequenter of the Cafe de +Seville, and such a faithful customer that the cashier calls you by your +Christian name. And do you recall, Monsieur the future president of the +Council, that you did not acquit yourself very well when the sedentary +dame, who never has been seen to rise from her stool, and who, as a joker +pretended, was afflicted with two wooden legs, called you by a little +sign to the desk, and said to you, not without a shade of severity in her +tone: "Monsieur Eugene, we must be thinking of this little bill." + +Notwithstanding his title of poet, Amedee had not the gift of prophecy. +While seeing all these negligently dressed men seated outside at the Cafe +de Seville's tables, taking appetizers, the young man never suspected +that he had before him the greater part of the legislators destined to +assure, some years later, France's happiness. Otherwise he would have +respectfully taken note of each drinker and the color of his drink, since +at a later period this would have been very useful to him as a mnemonical +method for the understanding of our parliamentary combinations, which are +a little complicated, we must admit. For example, would it not have been +handy and agreeable to note down that the recent law on sugars had been +voted by the solid majority of absinthe and bitters, or to know that the +Cabinet's fall, day before yesterday, might be attributed simply to the +disloyal and perfidious abandonment of the bitter mints or blackcurrant +wine? + +Jocquelet, who professed the most advanced opinions in politics, +distributed several riotous and patronizing handshakes among these future +statesmen as he entered the establishment, followed by Amedee. + +Here, there were still more of politics, and also poets and literary men. +They lived a sort of hurly-burly life, on good terms, but one could not +get them confounded, for the politicians were all beard, the +litterateurs, all hair. + +Jocquelet directed his steps without hesitation toward the magnificent +red head of the whimsical poet, Paul Sillery, a handsome young fellow +with a wide-awake face, who was nonchalantly stretched upon the red +velvet cushion of the window-seat, before a table, around which were +three other heads of thick hair worthy of our early kings. + +"My dear Paul," said Jocquelet, in his most thrilling voice, handing +Sillery Amedee's manuscript, "here are some verses that I think are +superb, and I am going to recite them as soon as I can, at some +entertainment or benefit. Read them and give us your opinion of them. +I present their author to you, Monsieur Amedee Violette. Amedee, I +present you to Monsieur Paul Sillery." + +All the heads of hair, framing young and amiable faces, turned curiously +toward the newcomer, whom Paul Sillery courteously invited to be seated, +with the established formula, "What will you take?" Then he began to +read the lines that the comedian had given him. + +Amedee, seated on the edge of his chair, was distracted with timidity, +for Paul Sillery already enjoyed a certain reputation as a rising poet, +and had established a small literary sheet called La Guepe, which +published upon its first page caricatures of celebrated men with large +heads and little bodies, and Amedee had read in it some of Paul's poems, +full of impertinence and charm. An author whose work had been published! +The editor of a journal! The idea was stunning to poor innocent +Violette, who was not aware then that La Guepe could not claim forty +subscribers. He considered Sillery something wonderful, and waited with +a beating heart for the verdict of so formidable a judge. At the end of +a few moments Sillery said, without raising his eyes from the manuscript: + +"Here are some fine verses!" + +A flood of delight filled the heart of the poet from the Faubourg +St.-Jacques. + +As soon as he had finished his reading, Paul arose from his seat, and, +extending both hands over the carafes and glasses to Amedee, said, +enthusiastically: + +"Let me shake hands with you! Your description of the battle-scene is +astonishing! It is admirable! It is as clear and precise as Merimee, +and it has all the color and imagination that he lacks to make him a +poet. It is something absolutely new. My dear Monsieur Violette, I +congratulate you with all my heart! I can not ask you for this beautiful +poem for La Guepe that Jocquelet is so fortunate as to have to recite, +and of which I hope he will make a success. But I beg of you, as a great +favor, to let me have some verses for my paper; they will be, I am sure, +as good as these, if not better. To be sure, I forgot to tell you that +we shall not be able to pay you for the copy, as La Guepe does not +prosper; I will even admit that it only stands on one leg. In order to +make it appear for a few months longer, I have recently been obliged I I8 +to go to a money-lender, who has left me, instead of the classical +stuffed crocodile, a trained horse which he had just taken from an +insolvent circus. I mounted the noble animal to go to the Bois, but at +the Place de la Concorde he began to waltz around it, and I was obliged +to get rid of this dancing quadruped at a considerable loss. So your +contribution to La Guepe would have to be gratuitous, like those of all +the rest. You will give me the credit of having saluted you first of +all, my dear Violette, by the rare and glorious title of true poet. You +will let me reserve the pleasure of intoxicating you with the odor that a +printer's first proofs give, will you not? Is it agreed?" + +Yes, it was agreed! That is to say, Amedee, touched to the depths of his +heart by so much good grace and fraternal cordiality, was so troubled in +trying to find words to express his gratitude, that he made a terrible +botch of it. + +"Do not thank me," said Paul Sillery, with his pleasant but rather +sceptical smile, "and do not think me better than I am. If all your +verses are as strong as these that I have just read, you will soon +publish a volume that will make a sensation, and--who knows? --perhaps +will inspire me first of all with an ugly attack of jealousy. Poets are +no better than other people; they are like the majority of Adam's sons, +vain and envious, only they still keep the ability to admire, and the +gift of enthusiasm, and that proves their superiority and is to their +credit. I am delighted to have found a mare's nest to-day, an original +and sincere poet, and with your permission we will celebrate this happy +meeting. The price of the waltzing horse having hardly sufficed to pay +off the debt to the publisher of La Guepe, I am not in funds this +evening; but I have credit at Pere Lebuffle's, and I invite you all to +dinner at his pot-house; after which we will go to my rooms, where I +expect a few friends, and there you will read us your verses, Violette; +we will all read some of them, and have a fine orgy of rich rhymes." + +This proposition was received with favor by the three young men with the +long hair, a la Clodion and Chilperic. As for Violette, he would have +followed Paul Sillery at that moment, had it been into the infernal +regions. + +Jocquelet could not go with them, he had promised his evening to a lady, +he said, and he gave this excuse with such a conceited smile that all +were convinced he was going to crown himself with the most flattering of +laurels at the mansion of some princess of the royal blood. In reality, +he was going to see one of his Conservatoire friends, a large, lanky +dowdy, as swarthy as a mole and full of pretensions, who was destined +for the tragic line of character, and inflicted upon her lover Athalie's +dream, Camille's imprecations, and Phedre's monologue. + +After paying for the refreshments, Sillery gave his arm to Amedee, and, +followed by the three Merovingians, they left the cafe. Forcing a way +through the crowd which obstructed the sidewalk of the Faubourg +Montmartre he conducted his guests to Pere Lebuffle's table d'hote, +which was situated on the third floor of a dingy old house in the Rue +Lamartine, where a sickening odor of burnt meat greeted them as soon as +they reached the top of the stairs. They found there, seated before a +tablecloth remarkable for the number of its wine-stains, two or three +wild-looking heads of hair, and four or five shaggy beards, to whom Pere +Lebuffle was serving soup, aided by a tired-looking servant. The name +under which Sillery had designated the proprietor of the table d'hote +might have been a nickname, for this stout person in his shirt-sleeves +recommended himself to one's attentions by his bovine face and his +gloomy, wandering eyes. To Amedee's amazement, Pere Lebuffle called the +greater part of his clients "thou," and as soon as the newcomers were +seated at table, Amedee asked Sillery, in a low voice, the cause of this +familiarity. + +"It is caused by the hard times, my dear Violette," responded the editor +of 'La Guepe' as he unfolded his napkin. "There is no longer a +'Maecenas' or 'Lawrence the Magnificent.' The last patron of literature +and art is Pere Lebufle. This wretched cook, who has perhaps never read +a book or seen a picture, has a fancy for painters and poets, and allows +them to cultivate that plant, Debt, which, contrary to other vegetables, +grows all the more, the less it is watered with instalments. We must +pardon the good man," said he, lowering his voice, "his little sin-- +a sort of vanity. He wishes to be treated like a comrade and friend by +the artists. Those who have several accounts brought forward upon his +ledger, arrive at the point of calling him 'thou,' and I, alas! am of +that number. Thanks to that, I am going to make you drink something a +little less purgative than the so-called wine which is turning blue in +that carafe, and of which I advise you to be suspicious. I say, +Lebuffle, my friend here, Monsieur Amedee Violette, will be, sooner or +later, a celebrated poet. Treat him accordingly, my good fellow, and go +and get us a bottle of Moulins-Vent." + +The conversation meanwhile became general between the bearded and long- +haired men. Is it necessary to say that they were all animated, both +politicians and 'litterateurs', with the most revolutionary sentiments? +At the very beginning, with the sardines, which evidently had been +pickled in lamp-oil, a terribly hairy man, the darkest of them all, with +a beard that grew up into its owner's eyes and then sprung out again in +tufts from his nose and ears, presented some elegiac regrets to the +memory of Jean-Paul Marat, and declared that at the next revolution it +would be necessary to realize the programme of that delightful friend of +the people, and make one hundred thousand heads fall. + +"By thunder, Flambard, you have a heavy hand!" exclaimed one of the +least important of beards, one of those that degenerate into side- +whiskers as they become conservative. "One hundred thousand heads!" + +"It is the minimum," replied the sanguinary beard. + +Now, it had just been revealed to Amedee that under this ferocious beard +was concealed a photographer, well known for his failures, and the young +man could not help thinking that if the one hundred thousand heads in +question had posed before the said Flambard's camera, he would not show +such impatience to see them fall under the guillotine. + +The conversation of the men with the luxuriant hair was none the less +anarchical when the roast appeared, which sprung from the legendary +animal called 'vache enragee'. The possessor of the longest and thickest +of all the shock heads, which spread over the shoulders of a young story +writer--between us, be it said, he made a mistake in not combing it +oftener--imparted to his brothers the subject for his new novel, which +should have made the hair of the others bristle with terror; for the +principal episode in this agreeable fiction was the desecration of a dead +body in a cemetery by moonlight. There was a sort of hesitation in the +audience, a slight movement of recoil, and Sillery, with a dash of +raillery in his glance, asked the novelist: + +"Why the devil do you write such a story?" + +The novelist replied, in a thundering tone: + +"To astonish the bourgeoisie!" + +And nobody made the slightest objection. + +To "astonish the bourgeoisie" was the dearest hope and most ardent wish +of these young men, and this desire betrayed itself in their slightest +word; and doubtless Amedee thought it legitimate and even worthy of +praise. However, he did not believe--must we admit his lack of +confidence?--that so many glorious efforts were ever crowned with +success. He went so far as to ask himself whether the character and +cleverness of these bourgeoisie would not lead them to ignore not only +the works, but even the existence, of the authors who sought to +"astonish" them; and he thought, not without sadness, that when La Guepe +should have published this young novelist's ghostly composition, the +unconquerable bourgeoisie would know nothing about it, and would continue +to devote itself to its favorite customs, such as tapping the barometer +to know whether there was a change, or to heave a deep sigh after +guzzling its soup, saying, "I feel better!" without being the least +astonished in the world. + +In spite of these mental reservations, which Amedee reproached himself +with, being himself an impure and contemptible Philistine, the poet was +delighted with his new friends and the unknown world opening before him. +In this Bohemian corner, where one got intoxicated with wild excesses and +paradoxes, recklessness and gayety reigned. The sovereign charm of youth +was there, and Amedee, who had until now lived in a dark hiding-place, +blossomed out in this warm atmosphere. + +After a horrible dessert of cheese and prunes, Pere Lebuffle's guests +dispersed. Sillery escorted Amedee and the three Merovingians to the +little, sparsely furnished first floor in the Rue Pigalle, where he +lived; and half a dozen other lyric poets, who might have furnished some +magnificent trophies for an Apache warrior's scalping-knife, soon came to +reenforce the club which met there every Wednesday evening. + +Seats were wanting at the beginning, but Sillery drew from a closet an +old black trunk which would hold two, and contented himself, as master of +the house, with sitting from time to time, with legs dangling, upon the +marble mantel. The company thus found themselves very comfortable; still +more so when an old woman with a dirty cap had placed upon the table, in +the middle of the room, six bottles of beer, some odd glasses, and a +large flowered plate upon which was a package of cut tobacco with +cigarette paper. They began to recite their verses in a cloud of smoke. +Each recited his own, called upon by Sillery; each would rise without +being urged, place his chair in front of him, and leaning one hand upon +its back, would recite his poem or elegy. Certainly some of them were +wanting in genius, some were even ludicrous. Among the number was a +little fellow with a cadaverous face, about as large as two farthings' +worth of butter, who declared, in a long speech with flat rhymes, that an +Asiatic harem was not capable of quenching his ardent love of pleasure. +A fat-faced fellow with a good, healthy, country complexion, announced, +in a long story, his formal intention of dying of a decline, on account +of the treason of a courtesan with a face as cold as marble; while, if +the facts were known, this peaceable boy lived with an artless child of +the people, brightening her lot by reducing her to a state of slavery; +she blacked his boots for him every morning before he left the house. + +In spite of these ridiculous things, there were present some genuine +poets who knew their business and had real talent. These filled Amedee +with respect and fear, and when Sillery called his name, he arose with a +dry mouth and heavy heart. + +"It is your turn now, you newcomer! Recite us your 'Before Sebastopol.'" + +And so, thoroughbred that he was, Amedee overcame his emotion and +recited, in a thrilling voice, his military rhymes, that rang out like +the report of a veteran's gun. + +The last stanza, was greeted with loud applause, and all the auditors +arose and surrounded Amedee to offer him their congratulations. + +"Why, it is superb!" + +"Entirely new!" + +"It will make an enormous success!" + +"It is just what is needed to arouse the public!" + +"Recite us something else!--something else!" + +Reassured and encouraged, master of himself, he recited a popular scene +in which he had freely poured out his love for the poor people. He next +recited some of his Parisian suburban scenes, and then a series of +sonnets, entitled "Love's Hopes," inspired by his dear Maria; and he +astonished all these poets by the versatility and variety of his +inspirations. + +At each new poem bravos were thundered out, and the young man's heart +expanded with joy under this warm sunshine of success. His audience vied +with each other to approach Amedee first, and to shake his hand. Alas! +some of those who were there would, later, annoy him by their low envy +and treason; but now, in the generous frankness of their youth, they +welcomed him as a master. + +What an intoxicating evening! Amedee reached his home about two o'clock +in the morning, his hands burning with the last grasps, his brain and +heart intoxicated with the strong wine of praise. He walked with long +and joyful strides through the fairy scene of a beautiful moonlight, in +the fresh morning wind which made his clothes flutter and caressed his +face. He thought he even felt the breath of fame. + + + + +ETEXT EDITOR'S BOOKMARKS: + +Dreams, instead of living +Fortunate enough to keep those one loves +Learned that one leaves college almost ignorant +Paint from nature +The sincere age when one thinks aloud +Upon my word, there are no ugly ones (women) +Very young, and was in love with love + + + + +End of this Project Gutenberg Etext of A Romance of Youth, v2 +by Francois Coppee + diff --git a/3959.zip b/3959.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..c309d38 --- /dev/null +++ b/3959.zip diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. 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