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diff --git a/38657-8.txt b/38657-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d86eb06 --- /dev/null +++ b/38657-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,2453 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of Love Among the Lions, by F. Anstey + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: Love Among the Lions + A Matrimonial Experience + +Author: F. Anstey + +Release Date: January 23, 2012 [EBook #38657] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LOVE AMONG THE LIONS *** + + + + +Produced by David Clarke, Matthew Wheaton and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive/Canadian Libraries) + + + + + + + + + + LOVE AMONG THE LIONS + + A MATRIMONIAL EXPERIENCE + + BY F. ANSTEY + AUTHOR OF "VICE VERSA," ETC. + + + LONDON + J. M. DENT & CO. + 29 & 30 BEDFORD STREET, W.C. + + + + + List of Illustrations + + + Page + + The exquisite face looking out over the wire blind 4 + + Æneas Polkinghorne 5 + + Still I persevered 9 + + The Introduction of Mr Blenkinsop to Miss + Lurana de Castro 12 + + "And whom should I marry, Mr Blenkinsop?" 18 + + "Let us be married in the Lion's Cage" 26 + + "Yes, papa, we are a little late" 31 + + "First-rate idea of yours, Blenkinsop" 33 + + "Well, if the lady's as game as she seems, and + the gentleman likewise, I don't see any + objection" 41 + + We were still chatting when Laurana returned 43 + + A Cleric of the broad-minded school 51 + + "If you go on like that I shall begin to think + you want to frighten me" 55 + + Mademoiselle 63 + + "A de Castro can never marry a Craven" 73 + + "If them two got together, there'd be the doose's + delight" 79 + + I was forlornly mopping when Niono returned 82 + + My wedding toilette was complete 87 + + It's a swindle 91 + + A kind of small procession entered the arena 95 + + Then he addressed the audience 101 + + "If only you had been firmer, Theodore" 113 + + + + +Love among the Lions + + + + +PART I + + +In the following pages will be found the only authentic account of an +affair which provided London, and indeed all England, with material +for speculation and excitement for a period of at least nine days. + +So many inaccurate versions have been circulated, so many ill-natured +and unjust aspersions have been freely cast, that it seemed advisable +for the sake of those principally concerned to make a plain +unvarnished statement of the actual facts. And when I mention that I +who write this am the Theodore Blenkinsop whose name was, not long +since, as familiar in the public mouth as household words, I venture +to think that I shall at once recall the matter to the shortest +memory, and establish my right to speak with authority on the +subject. + +At the time I refer to I was--and for the matter of that still +am--employed at a lucrative salary as taster to a well-known firm of +tea-merchants in the City. I occupied furnished apartments, a +sitting-room and bedroom, over a dairy establishment in Tadmor +Terrace, near Baalbec Road, in the pleasant and salubrious district of +Highbury. + +Arrived at the age of twenty-eight, I was still a bachelor and had +felt no serious inclination to change my condition until the memorable +afternoon on which the universe became transformed for me in the +course of a quiet stroll round Canonbury Square. + +For the information of those who may be unacquainted with it, I may +state that Canonbury Square is in Islington; the houses, though +undeniably dingy as to their exteriors, are highly respectable, and +mostly tenanted by members of the medical, musical, or scholastic +professions; some have balconies and verandahs which make it +difficult to believe that one has not met them, like their occupiers, +at some watering place in the summer. + +The square is divided into two by a road on which frequent tramcars +run to the City, and the two central enclosures are neatly laid out +with gravelled paths and garden seats; in the one there is a dovecot, +in the other there are large terra-cotta oil-jars, bringing +recollections of the Arabian Nights and the devoted Morgiana. + +All this, I know, is not strictly to the point, but I am anxious to +make it clear that the locality, though not perhaps a chosen haunt of +Rank and Fashion, possesses compensations of its own. + +Strolling round Canonbury Square, then, I happened to glance at a +certain ground floor window in which an art-pot, in the form of a +chipped egg hanging in gilded chains and enamelled shrimp-pink, gave a +note of femininity that softened the dusty severity of a wire blind. + +Under the chipped egg, and above the top of the blind, gazing out with +an air of listless disdain and utter weariness, was a lovely vivid +face, which, with its hint of pent-up passion and tropical languor, I +mentally likened to a pomegranate flower; not that I have ever seen a +pomegranate flower, though I am more familiar with the fruit--which, +to my palate, has too much the flavour of firewood to be wholly +agreeable--but somehow it seemed the only appropriate comparison. + +[Illustration: The exquisite face looking out over the wire blind.] + +After that, few days passed on which I did not saunter at least once +round the square, and several times I was rewarded by the sight of +that same exquisite face, looking out over the wire blind, always +with the same look of intense boredom and haughty resentment of her +surroundings--a kind of modern Mariana, with an area to represent the +moat. + +[Illustration: Æneas Polkinghorne.] + +I was hopelessly in love from the very first; I thought of nothing but +how to obtain admission to her presence; as time went on, I fancied +that when I passed there was a gleam of recognition, of half-awakened +interest in her long-lashed eyes, but it was difficult to be certain. +On the railing by the door was a large brass plate, on which was +engraved: "Æneas Polkinghorne, Professor of Elocution. Prospectus +within." So I knew the name of my divinity. I can give no greater +indication of the extent of my passion, even at this stage, than by +saying that I found this surname musical, and lingered over each +syllable with delight. + +But that brought me no nearer to her, and at last a plan occurred to +me by which the abyss of the area that separated us might possibly be +bridged over. Nothing could be simpler than my device--and yet there +was an audacity about it that rather startled me at first. It was +this: the brass plate said "Prospectus within." Very well, all I had +to do was to knock boldly and ask for one, which, after some natural +hesitation, I did. + +Any wild hope of obtaining an interview with Miss Polkinghorne was +doomed to instant disappointment. I was received by the Professor +himself, a tall, stout, flabby person, with sandy hair combed back +over his brow and worn long behind, who showed a most sympathetic +interest in me, inquiring whether I wished to be prepared for the +Church, the Stage, or the Bar, or whether I had any idea of entering +Parliament. I fear I allowed him to suppose the latter, although I am +about as likely to get into Parliament as into an imperial pint +measure; but I had to say something to account for my visit, and the +tea-trade does not call for much in the way of oratorical skill from +its votaries. + +Our interview was brief, but I came away, not only with a prospectus, +but with tickets, for which I paid cash, entitling me to a course of +six lessons in elocution. + +This was rather more than I had calculated upon--but, at least, it +gave me the _entrée_ to the house, and it might lead to something +more. + +It did not seem as if it was going to lead to much; the Professor's +method of teaching was peculiar: he would post me in a study at the +back of the house, where I was instructed to declaim some celebrated +oration at the top of my voice while he retired upstairs to discover +how far my voice would carry. + +After twenty minutes or so he would return with the information, which +I have no reason to disbelieve, that he had not heard a single word +above the first landing. + +Still I persevered, sustained by the thought that, when I was +delivering the oration of Brutus over Cæsar, or the famous passage +about the Queen of France and the "ten thousand swords leaping from +their scabbards," my words might perchance reach Miss Polkinghorne's +ear and excite in her a passing emotion. + +But I came to the end of my tickets and still I was as far as ever +from my goal, while the exertion of shouting had rendered me painfully +husky. + +[Illustration: Still I persevered.] + +Yet I would not give in; I set myself to gain the Professor's good +opinion; I took more tickets. It was not till after I had run through +these that I ascertained, by an apparently careless inquiry, that +there was no such person as Miss Polkinghorne--the Professor was a +widower and had never had a daughter! + +The thought that I had wasted so much time and money for nothing was +bitter at first, and I very nearly decided to discontinue my studies +there and then. But I conquered my feelings. Though the Professor was +no relation to this young lady, he must know her name, he must be able +to give me some information about her; a little judicious pumping +might render him communicative. + +"My dear Sir," he said, after I had been beating about the bush for +some time with cautious delicacy, "I think I understand. You are +anxious to make this young lady's acquaintance with a view to paying +your addresses to her? Is not that so?" + +I confessed that he had managed to penetrate my motives, though I +could not imagine how. + +"You will not be the first who has sought to win Lurana's +affections," he said; "more than one of my pupils--but the child is +ambitious, difficult to please. Unfortunately, this is your final +lesson--otherwise I might, after preparing the ground, so to say, have +presented you to her, and I daresay she would have been pleased to +give you a cup of tea occasionally after your labours. Indeed, as Miss +Lurana de Castro's stepfather, I can answer for that--however, since +our acquaintance unhappily ceases here----" + +It did not cease there; I took another dozen tickets at once, and if +even Polkinghorne had sounded sweetly to my enamoured ear, you may +conceive what enchanting melody lay in a name so romantic and so +euphonious as Lurana de Castro. + +The Professor was as good as his word; at the end of the very next +lesson I was invited to follow him to the drawing-room, where I found +the owner of the brilliant face that had so possessed me seated at her +tea-table. + +She gave me a cup of tea, and I can pay her witchery no higher +compliment when I state that it seemed to me as nectar, even though +my trained palate detected in it an inartistic and incongruous blend +of broken teas, utterly without either style or quality. I am not sure +that I did not ask for another. + +[Illustration: The Introduction of Mr Blenkinsop to Miss Lurana de +Castro.] + +She was astonishingly lovely; her Spanish descent was apparent in her +magnificent black tresses, lustrous eyes, and oval face of olive +tinted with richest carmine. As I afterwards learnt, she was the +daughter of a Spanish Government official of an ancient Castilian +family, who had left his widow in such straitened circumstances that +she was compelled to support herself by exhibiting performing mice and +canaries at juvenile parties, until she met and married the Professor, +who at that time was delivering recitations illustrated by an +oxy-hydrogen lantern. + +The second marriage had not been altogether a success, and, now that +the Professor was a widower, I fancy that his relations with his +imperious stepdaughter were not invariably of the most cordial nature, +and that he would have been grateful to any one who succeeded in +winning her hand and freeing him from her sway. + +I did not know that then, however, though I was struck by the +deferential politeness of his manner towards her, and the alacrity +with which, after he had refreshed himself, he shuffled out of the +room, leaving Lurana to entertain me single-handed. + +That first evening with her was not unmixed joy. I had the +consciousness of being on trial. I knew that many had been tried and +found wanting before me. Lurana's attitude was languid, indifferent, +almost disdainful, and when I went away I had a forlorn conviction +that I should never again be asked to tea with her, and that the last +series of tickets represented money absolutely thrown away! + +And yet I _was_ asked again--not only once, but many times, which was +favourable as far as it went, for I felt tolerably certain that the +Professor would never have ventured to bring me a second time into his +daughter's presence, unless he had been distinctly given to understand +that my society was very far from distasteful to her. + +As I grew to know her better, I learnt the secret of her listlessness +and discontent with life. She was tormented by the unbounded ambitions +and the distinct limitations which embitter existence for so many +young girls of our day. + +The admiration which her beauty excited gave her little satisfaction; +such social success as Highbury or Canonbury could offer left her cold +and unmoved. She was pining for some distinction which should travel +beyond her own narrow little world, and there did not seem to be any +obvious way of attaining it. She would not have minded being a popular +author or artist--only she could find nothing worth writing about, and +she did not know how to draw; she would have loved to be a great +actress--but unfortunately she had never been able to commit the +shortest part to memory, and the pride of a de Castro forbade her to +accept anything but leading _rôles_. + +No wonder that she was devoured by dulness, or that there were moments +when she beat her pinions like some captive wild bird against the cage +of her own incompetence. Even I, although fairly content with my lot, +would sometimes flap my own wings, so to speak, from sheer sympathy. + +"It's maddening to be a nobody!" she would declare, as she threw +herself petulantly back in her chair, with her arms raised behind her +and her interlaced fingers forming a charming cradle for her head--a +favourite attitude of hers. "It does seem so stupid not to be +celebrated when almost everybody is! And to think that I have a friend +like Ruth Rakestraw, who knows ever so many editors and people, and +could make me famous with a few strokes of the pen--if only I did +something to give her the chance. But I never _do_!" + +Miss Rakestraw, I should explain, was an enterprising young lady +journalist, who contributed society news and "on dits" to the leading +Islington and Holloway journals, and was understood to have had +"leaderettes" and "turnovers" accepted by periodicals of even greater +importance. + +"If only," Lurana burst out on one of these occasions, "if only I +could do something once which would get my name into all the papers, +set everybody thinking of me, talking of me, staring after me wherever +I went, make editors write for my photograph, and interviewers beg for +my biography, I think I should be content." + +I made the remark, which was true but not perhaps startling in its +originality, that fame of this kind was apt to be of brief duration. + +"What should I care?" she cried; "I should have _had_ it. I could keep +the cuttings; they would always be there to remind me that once at +least--but what's the use of talking? I shall never see my name in all +the papers. I know I shan't!" + +"There _is_ a way!" I ventured to observe; "you might have your name +in all the papers, if you married." + +"As if I meant _that_!" she said, with a deliciously contemptuous +pout. "And whom should I marry, if you please, Mr Blenkinsop?" + +"You might marry me!" I suggested humbly. + +"You!" she retorted. "How would _that_ make me a celebrity. You are +not even one yourself." + +[Illustration: "And whom should I marry, Mr Blenkinsop?"] + +"I do not care to boast," I said, "but it is the simple fact that +nobody in the entire tea-trade has a palate approaching mine for +keenness and delicacy. Ask any one and they will tell you the same." + +"You may be the best tea-taster in the world," she said, "but the +purity of your palate will never gain you a paragraph in a single +society paper. And even if it did, what should _I_ gain? At the best +a reflected glory. I want to be a somebody myself!" + +"What's the use of trying to make ourselves what we are not?" I broke +out. "If Fate has made us wooden ninepins in the world's nursery, we +may batter our head against the walls as much as we like--but we can +never batter it into a profile!" + +I thought this rather neatly put myself, but it did not appeal to Miss +de Castro, who retorted with some asperity that I was the best judge +of the material of my own head, but hers, at least, was not wooden, +while she had hitherto been under the impression that it already +possessed a profile--such as it was. + +She could not be brought to understand that I was merely employing a +metaphor, and for the remainder of the evening her demeanour was so +crushingly chilling, that I left in the lowest spirits, persuaded that +my unlucky tongue had estranged me from Lurana for ever. + +For some time I avoided Canonbury Square altogether, for I felt +unequal to facing an elocution lesson unrecompensed by tea with Miss +de Castro, and the halfhour or more of delightful solitude _à deux_ +which followed the meal--for it had never occurred to the Professor to +provide his stepdaughter with a chaperon. + +At last, when on the verge of despair, hope returned in the form of a +little note from Lurana, asking whether I was dead, and inviting me, +if still in existence, to join a small party to visit the World's Fair +at the Agricultural Hall the next evening, and return to supper +afterwards at Canonbury Square, an invitation which, need I say, I +joyfully accepted. + +We were only four; Miss Rakestraw and her _fiancé_, a smart young +solicitor's clerk, of the name of Archibald Chuck, whose employer had +lately presented him with his articles; myself, and Lurana. The +Professor was unable to accompany us, having an engagement to read +"Hiawatha" to a Young Men's Mutual Improvement Society that evening. + +Part of the hall was taken up by various side-shows, +shooting-galleries, and steam merry-go-rounds, which produced a +discordant and deafening din until a certain hour of the evening, when +the noises subsided, and Wooker and Sawkins' World-renowned Circus +gave a performance in the arena, which occupied the centre. + +Miss Rakestraw's connection with the Press procured us free passes to +the reserved seats close to the ring; my chair was next to Lurana's, +and she was graciously pleased to ignore our recent difference. The +entertainment was of the usual variety, I suppose; but, to tell the +truth, I was so absorbed in the bliss of being once more by her side +and watching her face, which looked more dazzling than ever through +the delicate meshes of her veil, that I have the vaguest recollection +of the earlier items of the programme. + +But towards the close there came a performance which I have good +reason to remember. + +An enormous elephant entered the circle, drawing a trolley, upon which +was an iron cage containing forest-bred African lions. After the +electric globes had been lowered, so as to illuminate the interior, +"Niono, the Lion King," a dapper, wellmade man, of very much my own +height and figure, so far as I could judge, went into the cage and put +the animals through various exercises. Niono was succeeded by Mlle. +Léonie, the "Circe of the Carnivora," a pretty Frenchwoman, who, as it +seemed to me, surpassed him in coolness and daring. There was nothing +disagreeably sensational about the exhibition; all the animals were +evidently under perfect control; the huge, black-maned lions leaped +through paper hoops and blazing circles without the slightest loss of +either temper or dignity; the females followed obediently. Only one +lioness showed any disposition to be offensive, and _she_ did not +venture to go beyond yawning ostentatiously whenever Mlle. Léonie's +eye was upon her. + +Altogether it was, as I remarked to Lurana at the time, a wonderful +instance of the natural dominion of man over the animal world. She +enthusiastically commended the symmetry of Mr Niono's figure, which +did not strike me as so very much above the average; and to pique her, +I expressed equal admiration for Mlle. Léonie, and was gratified to +observe unmistakable signs of jealousy on Lurana's part. But we were +both agreed that the profession of lion-taming looked more dangerous +than it actually was, and Archibald Chuck mentioned that some townsman +in the provinces had, for a very trifling wager, entered a den of +lions in a travelling menagerie with perfect impunity. Miss Rakestraw +capped this by a case from America, in which a young couple had +actually chosen a lion's cage to be married in, though she admitted +that the story was possibly a fabrication. + +I walked back with Lurana alone, as we somehow lost sight of Mr Chuck +and his _fiancée_ in the crush going out, and on the way home I could +not refrain from pleading my cause once more. I told her how I had +loved her at first sight, and how many elocution lessons I had endured +for her sake; I pointed out that I was already receiving a salary +sufficient to maintain a wife in comfort, if not luxury; and that her +married life could hardly be more monotonous and uncongenial than her +present existence. + +She listened attentively, as if moved. Presently she said, "Theodore, +I will be perfectly frank. I do like you; I believe I could even love +you. But I have Spanish blood in my veins. I could never be satisfied +with a humdrum conventional marriage." + +I was inexpressibly shocked. I had no idea that her views were so +emancipated. + +"Lurana," I said, "believe me, never mind what the lady novelists say +against marriage; it may have its disadvantages, but, after all, as +society is constituted----" + +"You don't understand," she said. "I am not opposed to marriage--with +a man who is willing to make some concession, some slight sacrifice, +to gratify me. But are you that _kind_ of man, Theodore, I wonder?" + +I saw that she was already beginning to yield. "I would do +anything--anything in the world you bid me," I cried, "if only you +will be my wife, Lurana." + +"I should ask you to do nothing that I am not perfectly prepared to do +myself," she said. "A temporary inconvenience, a risk which is the +merest trifle. Still, you may think it too much, Theodore." + +"Name it," I replied. "The opportunities which the tea trade affords +for the cultivation of heroism are rare; but there are few risks that +I would shrink from running with you." + +"It is only this," she said. "I don't want a commonplace wedding. I +want one that will be talked about and make a sensation. Will you let +me be married in my own way?" + +I was rather relieved by what seemed so moderate a demand. "Certainly, +darling," I said; "we will be married in Westminster Abbey, by the +Archbishop of Canterbury, if you wish it, and it can be arranged. What +matter where or how the ceremony take place, or what it costs, +provided it makes you mine for ever?" + +[Illustration: "Let us be married in the Lion's Cage."] + +"Then, Theodore," she said, pressing my arm impulsively with her slim +fingers, while the rays of a street lamp in the square fell on her +upturned face and shining eyes, "let us be married at the Agricultural +Hall--in the Lions' Cage!" + +I confess to being considerably startled. I had expected something +rather out of the common, but nothing in the least like this. + +"In the lions' cage!" I repeated, blankly. "Wouldn't that be rather +_smelly_, Lurana? And, besides, the menagerie people would never lend +it for such a purpose. Where would they put the lions, you know?" + +"Why, the lions would be _there_, of course," she said, "or else +there'd be nothing in it." + +"If I am to be married in a lion-cage," I said, with a very feeble +attempt at levity, "I should very much prefer that there _was_ nothing +in it." + +"Ah, you may laugh, Theodore!" she said, "but, after all your +professions, surely you won't refuse the very first indulgence I ask! +You may think it a mere whim, a girlish caprice; but understand +this--I am thoroughly in earnest about it. If you are willing to marry +me as I wish, the wedding may be as soon as ever you please. But if +not, tell me so plainly, and let us part for ever. Either I will be +married in my own way, or not at all." + +What could I do? It was simply impossible to give her up now, the very +moment after she was won. And to lose her for such a mere punctilio; +for, of course, this condition of hers was too fantastic to be +practicable; the Professor would certainly refuse his consent to so +eccentric a ceremony; Lurana herself would probably realise before +long the absurdity of the idea. In the meantime, as her acknowledged +_fiancé_, I should have the immense advantage of being on the spot +when she returned to a more reasonable frame of mind. + +So I gave way, and assured her that I had no personal objection to +lions, and would as soon be married in their presence as elsewhere, +provided that we could obtain the necessary permission; and even if I +had thought this more probable than I did, I believe--so potent was +the witchery of Lurana's voice and eyes--I should have said precisely +the same. + +"Dearest Theodore!" she murmured, "I never really doubted you. I felt +so sure that you would be nice and sympathetic about it. If we +couldn't agree about such a trifling thing as where we are to be +married, we _should_ be unsuited to one another, shouldn't we? Now we +will just walk round the square once more, and then go in and tell the +others what we have arranged." + +They had sat down to supper when we entered, and the Professor cast a +glance of keen inquiry through his spectacles at us, over the cold +beef and pickles with which he was recruiting his energies after +"Hiawatha." + +"Yes, papa," said Lurana, calmly, "we _are_ a little late; but +Theodore has been asking me to marry him, and I have said I would." + +There was an outburst of congratulations from Miss Rakestraw and +Chuck. Old Polkinghorne thought fit to conceal his joy under a cloak +of stagey emotion. "Well, well," he said, "it is Nature's law; the +young birds spread their wings and quit the warm nest, and the old +ones are left to sit and brood over the past. I cannot blame you, +child. As for _you_, my boy," he added, extending a flabby hand to me, +"all I can say is, there is no one to whom I would so willingly +surrender her." + +There was scarcely any one to whom, in my opinion, he would _not_ +surrender her with the utmost alacrity, for, as I have already hinted, +Lurana, with all her irresistible fascination, had a temper of her +own, and was apt to make the parental nest a trifle _too_ warm for the +elder bird occasionally. + +[Illustration: "Yes, papa, we are a little late."] + +"And when am I to lose my sunbeam?" he asked. "Not _just_ yet?" + +"Theodore wishes to have the marriage as soon as possible," said +Lurana, "by special licence." + +"Have you settled where?" inquired Miss Rakestraw, with feminine +interest in such details. + +"Well," said Lurana slowly, evidently enjoying the effect she was +producing, "Theodore and I have quite made up our minds to be married +at the Menagerie--in the den of lions." + +"How splendid!" exclaimed the lady journalist. "It's never been done +over here. _What_ a sensation it will make! I'll do a full descriptive +report for all my papers!" + +"That's what I call a real sporting way of getting spliced," said +Chuck. "Only wish I'd thought of it myself before I had our banns put +up, Ruth. First-rate idea of yours, Blenkinsop." + +"Of course," I said, "if the Professor thinks it in the least +unsafe----" + +[Illustration: "First-rate idea of yours, Blenkinsop."] + +"Oh, it's safe enough," put in Chuck, who was a little too apt to +volunteer his opinion. "Why, we've seen the lions, Professor; they're +as quiet as lambs. And anyway, they'd have the lion-tamer in with +them, you know. _They'll_ be all right!" + +"I think," said the Professor, "we may disregard the danger; but the +expense--have you thought what it will cost, Theodore?" + +"I have not," I said, "not till you mentioned it. It will probably be +enormous, more than I could possibly afford--unless you are ready to +go halves?" I concluded, feeling perfectly certain that he was ready +to do nothing of the sort. + +"But look here," said Chuck, "why should it cost you anything? If you +go the right way about it, you ought to get all your expenses paid by +the circus, and a share of the gate-money into the bargain." + +"Oh, Mr Chuck!" cried Lurana, "_how_ clever of you to think of that! +_wasn't_ it, Theodore?" + +I could have kicked Chuck, but I said it was a stroke of positive +genius. + +"That's simple enough," he said. "The rock _I_ see ahead is getting +the special licence. You see, if you want to marry anywhere else than +in a certified place of worship or a registry office, you must first +satisfy the Archbishop of Canterbury, or the Surrogate, or whoever the +old Josser is at Doctors' Commons who looks after these things, that +it's a 'convenient place' within the Marriage Act of 1836. Now, the +point is, _will_ a cage of lions strike them as coming under that +description?" + +If it should, the ecclesiastical notions of convenience must be more +than peculiar. For the first time I realised what an able fellow Chuck +was. + +"My dear Chuck!" I said, "what a marvellous knowledge you have of law! +You've hit the weak spot. It would be perfectly hopeless to make such +an application. It's a pity, but we must give it up, that's all--we +must give it up." + +"Then," said Lurana, "we must give up any marriage at all, for I +certainly don't intend to marry anywhere else." + +"After all," said the irrepressible Chuck, "all you need apply for is +a licence to marry in the Agricultural Hall; they won't want to know +the exact spot. I tell you what, you go and talk it over with the +circus people and fix the day, and I'll go up to Doctors' Commons and +get round 'em somehow. You leave it to me." + +"Do you know," said the Professor, beaming, "I really begin to think +this idea of yours can be carried out quite comfortably after all, +Theodore. It certainly has the attraction of novelty, besides being +safe, and even, it may be, remunerative. To a true lover, a lions' +cage may be as fit a temple of Hymen as any other structure, and their +roars be gentle as the ring-dove's coo. Go and see these people the +first thing tomorrow, and no doubt you will be able to come to terms +with them." + +This I agreed to do, and Lurana insisted on coming with me. Miss +Rakestraw was in ecstasies over our proposal, and undertook to what +she called "boom the wedding for all it was worth" in every paper with +which she had any connection, and with other more influential organs +to which the possession of such exclusive intelligence as hers would +procure her the _entrée_. + +By the end of the evening she had completely turned Lurana's head, and +even I myself was not quite untouched by the general enthusiasm. It +seemed to me that being married in a den of lions might not be such +bad fun after all. + +When I awoke next morning with the dawning recollection of what I was +in for, the glamour had in a great measure departed from the idea, +which seemed to me at best but a foolish piece of bravado. It had been +arranged that I should call for Lurana immediately after breakfast, +and interview the circus proprietors on my way to business, and I +rather expected to find that the night had borne counsel to her as +well as myself; but she was in exuberant spirits, and as keen about +the project as ever, so I thought it better not to betray that my own +ardour had abated. + +But what, after all, were we going to request? That these people +should allow their lions to be inconvenienced, quite unnecessarily, by +a wedding in their cage between two perfect strangers who had all +London to choose from! + +I believed that they would decline to entertain the suggestion for a +moment, and, if so, I could not blame them. I felt that they would +have both right and reason on their side. + +On arriving at the Hall, we inquired for Mr Wooker or Mr Sawkins, and +were requested to wait, which we did in a draughty passage smelling +strongly of stables, while loud snorting and wheezing reached our ears +from the arena, where they seemed to be exercising the circus stud. + +At last we were told that Mr Sawkins would see us (I don't know to +this day whether Mr Wooker had any real existence or not), and were +shown up to his office, which did not differ from any other office, +except that it had a gaudy circus poster and a bill announcing the +sale by auction of some rival menagerie pinned against the wall. As +for Mr Sawkins, he was a florid, jowly man, with the remnants of his +hair dyed and parted down the middle, a kind of amalgam of a country +job-master and the dignified person who bows customers into chairs in +a fashionable draper's establishment. + +He heard Lurana, who acted as spokeswoman, with magisterial gravity, +and, to my surprise, without appearing to regard us as a pair of +morbid maniacs. + +"There's no denying," he said, "that the thing would draw if properly +billed, always supposing, mind you, that it's capable of being done at +all. And the only person able to give an opinion about that is Mr +Onion, the gentleman," he explained, "who is our Lion King. He spells +his name 'Niono' professionally, which gives it more of an African +flavour, if you follow my meaning. I'll call down the tube for him." + +I awaited Mr Onion's arrival with impatience. He presently made his +appearance in a short-braided tunic, with black lamb's wool round the +collar and cuffs. By daylight his countenance, though far from +ill-looking, was sallow and seamed; there was a glance of admiration +in his bold, dark eyes as they rested on Lurana's spirited face. + +"Well," he decided, after the case had been explained to him, "if the +lady's as game as she seems, and the gentleman likewise, _I_ don't see +any objection. Along with _me_, there'll be no more danger than if it +was a cage of white mice--provided you've the nerve for it." + +Lurana said proudly that her own mother had been an accomplished +animal trainer--she did not mention the kind of animals--and that she +herself was quite incapable of being afraid of a lion. + +[Illustration: "Well, if the lady's as game as she seems, and the +gentleman likewise, I don't see any objection."] + +"If you've _got_ nerve," said Mr Niono, "you're right enough, but you +can't _create_ it; it's a gift. Take _me_. I'm hardly ever away from +my animals. I get downright impatient for every performance. But if +ever I got the feeling that I was _afraid_ of them lions or they +weren't afraid o' me, do you think I'd trust myself inside that cage? +No fear! They've left their marks on me as it is--my 'trade marks,' as +I call 'em--see!" and here he bared his arm and exhibited some fearful +scars; "but that's affection, that is." + +He then offered to introduce us to his pets, and I should have +accompanied Lurana to see the cage, only on the way we met Mlle. +Léonie, to whom Mr Sawkins presented me, and, naturally, I was +compelled to stop. She was a piquant-looking woman, not quite in her +first youth, perhaps, but still attractive, and with the +indescribable, airy grace of a Parisian, though I believe she came +from Belgium. Mademoiselle was charmed with our project, complimented +me upon my Britannic phlegm, and predicted that I should find the +little experience "all," as she put it, "that there was of the most +agreeable," which I devoutly hoped would be the case. + +[Illustration: We were still chatting when Laurana returned.] + +We were still chatting when Lurana returned, enraptured with the +lions, one of whom had actually allowed her to tickle him behind the +ear. Niono testified that _her_ nerve, at all events, was beyond +question. She was anxious that I should go and tickle the lion, too; +but this I declined, being occupied in talking to Mlle. Léonie at the +time. + +"There's one thing," said Mr Sawkins later, as we were discussing the +arrangements, "we shouldn't object to paying for the special licence; +but where are you going to find a parson to marry you? You must have a +parson of _some_ sort, you know." + +Again Fate seemed to have interposed an insurmountable barrier between +us and our desire. I had to admit that it would be difficult, if not +impossible, to find a clergyman courageous enough to enter the cage +with us. + +"Well, there's no call for him to be _inside_ of it," said Mr Niono, +who was with us, heart and soul, by this time. "In fact, the lady and +yourself are about as many as I could undertake to be answerable for. +We could rig him up a perch outside to read the service from, +comfortable." + +Even so, I said, I was afraid that it was hardly a service one could +ask any divine to perform. + +"I know a party who'd jump at it," said Mr Niono, who was full of +resource. "The Reverend Skipworth. _You_ know who I mean, Sawkins. +Little chap in a check suit and goggles I introduced to you at the bar +the other evening--always dropping in, he is. He'd do it, just for the +lark of the thing. And he's a regular professional, you know," he +added for my benefit, "though he don't sport a white choker in his +off hours; likes to go about and see life for himself, and quite +right. You get the licence, sir, and I'll guarantee that the Reverend +Ninian Skipworth will do the job for you." + +So we left the hall, delighted, especially Lurana, with the unexpected +ease with which our object had been attained. It had seemed at first +the wildest extravagance, and now there was apparently every prospect +that Lurana and I would really exchange our marriage vows in a den of +forest-bred lions, unless (which, of course, was a possibility that +had to be taken into account) the ecclesiastical authorities should +refuse to grant a special licence. + +I was unable to apply in person at Doctors' Commons, for Lurana +insisted that I should leave the whole matter in Chuck's hands, but I +impressed upon him the necessity of absolute candour with the +officials. + +Whether he told them all, whether they were remiss in making full +inquiry, or whether--as I would rather not think--he intentionally +deceived them, I cannot say, but at all events he came back +triumphantly with the special licence. + +Wooker and Sawkins had fixed an early date, and wished the wedding to +take place at night, so as to figure in the evening programme, but the +Surrogate, or somebody at the office, had insisted that it must be in +the afternoon, which would, of course, oblige Mr Sawkins to introduce +it at a _matinée_ performance. + +Miss Rakestraw proved herself a born journalist. She placed her news +at the disposal of an enterprising evening journal, whose bills that +very same evening came out with startling and alliterative headlines +such as: + + LOVE LAUGHS AT LIONS! + + _Canonbury Couple to Marry in Cageful of Carnivora._ + +and from that moment, as the reader will recollect, Lurana and I +became public characters. + +There were portraits--quite unrecognisable--of us in several of the +illustrated weeklies, together with sketches of and interviews with us +both, contributed by Miss Ruth's facile stylograph, and an account of +the Professor, contributed by himself. + +As for the daily papers there was scarcely one, from the _Times_ +downwards, which did not contain a leader, a paragraph, or a letter on +the subject of our contemplated wedding. Some denounced me violently +for foolhardy rashness, others for the selfishness with which I was +encouraging an impressionable girl to risk her life to gratify my +masculine vanity. Several indignantly demanded whether it was true +that the Archbishop had sanctioned such a scandalous abuse of marriage +rites, and if so, what the Home Office were about? + +There was a risk that all this publicity would end in the authorities +being compelled to interfere and countermand the ceremony, and yet I +cannot honestly say that I disliked the fuss that was made about it. +In the City, to be sure, I had to put up with a certain amount of +chaff; facetious inquiries as to whether I intended to present the +leonine bridesmaids with bones or pieces of raw meat, and the precise +locality in which my wife and I thought of spending our honeymoon. But +such _badinage_ covered a very genuine respect for my intrepidity, and +I was looked upon as a credit to the tea trade. + +The appointed day was getting nearer and nearer, and still--so +wonderfully did Fortune befriend us--the authorities gave no sign of +any intention to interfere. Parliament had not yet reassembled, so no +one could rise and put a question in the House to the Home Secretary, +and if Government officials ever read the morning papers, it seemed +that they did not feel called upon to take cognisance of anything they +read there, unless compelled to do so by pressure from without. + +Nor did the Archbishop take any steps. No doubt he may have been +unaware of the precise conditions under which the ceremony was to be +sanctioned, and the same remark applies to the Bishop of London. It is +true that their attention was drawn to the facts by more than one +postcard, as I have reason to know. But some people make a +practice--and it is not for me to condemn them--of taking no notice of +anonymous communications. + +However, as the time drew on, I thought it would be only proper on my +part to go and call upon the Reverend Ninian Skipworth, the curate +with whom our energetic friend, Mr Niono, had now made all the +necessary arrangements, and find out, quietly, what his state of mind +was. He might be wavering, in which case I should have to strengthen +his resolution. Or he might not yet have realised all the possible +consequences of his good nature, and if so, I should not be acting +fairly towards him if I did not lay them before him, even though the +result should be that he withdrew from his engagement. + +Niono had given me his address, and I looked in at the curate's +unpretentious lodgings one evening on my way home. I found him in, and +as soon as he learnt my name, he offered me whisky and soda and a +cigar with most unparsonical joviality. + +[Illustration: A Cleric of the broad-minded school.] + +The Reverend Ninian, I found, was a cleric of the broad-minded school +which scorns conventional restrictions; he held that if the Church +was to maintain its influence, it must follow the trend of modern +progress, and neglect no opportunity of winning the hearts of the +people. He was only sorry, he told me, that the prejudices of his +Bishop would prevent him from reading the service inside the cage. + +I replied gratefully that I was sufficiently indebted to him as it +was, since if his connection with the affair reached the episcopal +ear, he would be in serious danger of being suspended, even if he did +not receive some still heavier punishment. + +"Oh, don't you bother about that!" he said, cheerily; "it's awfully +good of you to trouble yourself on my account; but if the Bishop is +such an old stick-in-the-mud as to haul me up for a little thing like +this, I shall simply chuck up the Church altogether, that's all! In +fact, I've almost decided to do it in any case, for I believe I could +do more real good outside the Establishment than in. And I admire your +pluck, my dear fellow, and your manly straightforwardness in coming +here like this; and I'm hanged if I don't marry you and chance the +consequences, so don't say another word about it." + +I didn't, though I need not say I was profoundly moved by the genuine +sympathy and assistance which our project seemed to inspire in the +most unexpected quarters. + +My one anxiety now was about Lurana. Outwardly she appeared cheerful +and even gay, and thoroughly to enjoy her position as the heroine of +the hour; but how could I be sure that this was genuine and not a +highstrung hysterical self-repression which would be succeeded by a +violent reaction, it might be in the lions' cage itself? + +From that at all hazards she must be saved. Earnestly, seriously, I +pointed out how much would depend on her maintaining perfect coolness +and composure during the ceremony, and implored her, if she felt the +slightest misgivings, the smallest tendency to shrink in secret from +the coming ordeal, not to allow any false pride to close her lips. +There was still time, I reminded her. If on second thoughts, she +preferred to be married in the old time-honoured way, instead of in a +Menagerie den, she had only to say so. Her happiness and comfort were +the chief things to consider. + +"Withdraw now, Theodore?" she said, "after announcing it in all the +papers! Why, how _could_ we?" + +"I would take all that upon myself," I told her; "I need only say that +you don't feel quite equal to facing lions." + +"But I _do_, Theodore," she said, "the dear, ducky, pussy-faced old +things! Who could possibly be afraid of lions--especially with Mr +Niono to protect us?" + +"If you knew more _about_ lions, Lurana," I said, "you would know how +liable they are to sudden rages, and how little even lion-tamers +themselves--" + +"If you go on like that, Theodore," she said, "I shall begin to think +that you want to frighten me--and even that you are just a little +frightened yourself. But I'm not to be frightened. I should not be my +mother's daughter if I had any fear of animals. And once for all, you +will either marry me in the lions' cage or not at all!" + +[Illustration: "If you go on like that I shall begin to think you want +to frighten me."] + +I saw that I should only be exposing myself to further +misunderstanding if I pursued the subject. Lurana had that quality of +courage which springs from a total lack of imagination; she had never +seen a performing lion ramp and roar, and it was inconceivable to her +that one could ever indulge in such exercises. Still less did she +understand that there is another type of courage, which sees all the +difficulties and dangers beforehand, even exaggerated by distance, and +yet advances calmly and undauntedly to encounter them. My courage was +of that sort, and it is generally admitted that it belongs to a far +higher order than the other. + +Now that the die was cast I found myself anticipating the eventful day +with philosophic equanimity. It was an uncomfortable method of +getting married, no doubt, but after all, what man ever _was_ +comfortable at his own wedding? + +And surely one crowded quarter-of-an-hour (for it would certainly be +crowded in that cage) of glorious life would be worth an age without +Lurana--who was not to be won by any other means. + + + + +PART II + + +It was now the eve of my wedding-day, and it was generally taken for +granted that Lurana and I would be allowed to enter the lion-cage +without opposition from any quarter. + +Whether we should find it as easy to come out again was a point on +which opinions differed considerably, but the majority must have been +confident that the ceremony would pass off without any unpleasant +interruption--for the rush to obtain seats was tremendous. + +I was just as tranquil and collected as ever; I could not detect that +my valour had "ullaged," as wine-merchants say, in the slightest +degree, though Lurana was perpetually questioning me as to whether I +was sure I would not rather withdraw. + +Of course, I indignantly repudiated the very idea, but it is well +known that a perfectly sober person, if suddenly taxed with being +drunk, will seem and even feel so, and it is much the same with any +imputation of cowardice. + +I began to think that constant tea tasting, even though the infusions +are not actually swallowed, probably has some subtle effect upon the +nervous system, and that it would brace me up and also show me how +little cause I had to be uneasy, if I dropped into the Agricultural +Hall once more and saw Niono put his lions through their performances. + +So I left the City early that afternoon and paid for my admission to +the hall like an ordinary sightseer; I did not ask Lurana to accompany +me, because I knew she must have plenty to keep her at home just then. + +I was just in time for the performing lions, and found a place in the +outer edge of the crowd; it was strange to stand there unrecognised +and hear myself being freely discussed by all around; strange and +decidedly exhilarating, too, to think that in another twenty-four +hours I should be, not a spectator of what was to take place in that +arena, but one of the principal performers, the centre of breathless +interest, the hero of the hour! + +But with the appearance of the cage, this unnatural exhilaration +suddenly died down. It was not so much the lions, though they struck +me as larger and less easy-tempered than on the first occasion, while +the lioness was as nearly in open revolt as she dared. What troubled +me most was that the cage contained another inmate, one whom I did not +remember to have seen before--a magnificent specimen of the Bengal +tiger. + +It seemed perfectly clear to me that the brute was only about +half-trained; he went through his tricks in a sullen perfunctory way, +with a savage, snurring snap every now and then, which, even at that +distance, made my flesh creep. + +And, whenever he snapped, clouds of steam issued from his great jaws; +I could see, too, that the lioness was secretly egging him on to fresh +acts of defiance, and that he was only watching his opportunity to +crouch and spring as soon as Niono's back was turned. + +I was perfectly determined that I would not have that tiger at _my_ +wedding; he would never keep still for a moment; he would upset all +the other animals, and how could I be expected to remain cool with a +great, hot, steaming beast like that at my elbow? Why, he must raise +the temperature of that cage to the atmosphere of a Turkish bath! For +Lurana's sake as well as my own, I really must draw the line at +tigers--they were not in the bond. + +Another thing that annoyed me was the senseless tomfoolery of the +clowns, who persisted in running after the cage at the conclusion of +the performance, and teasing the poor defenceless animals by making +grimaces and dashing their ridiculous conical hats against the bars. +It was painful to think that any one could be found to smile at such +cheap buffoonery--if I had been the ring-master, I would have given +those cowardly idiots a taste of the whip! + +I decided to go round afterwards and see Onion about that tiger. + +I did not see the lion-tamer, as he had just left the hall, and Mr +Sawkins, I was told, was engaged, but I saw Mlle. Léonie, who was most +friendly. + +[Illustration: Mademoiselle.] + +I remarked, carelessly, that I saw they had put a tiger into the cage. + +Mademoiselle said he was a member of the _troupe_, but had been +indisposed and temporarily transferred to the hospital cage. + +I hinted that a tiger, however convalescent, was hardly a desirable +addition to our wedding party. Mademoiselle was astounded; a so +gracious beast, a veritable treasure, with him present, the ceremony +would have a style, a _cachet_, an elegance. Without him--ah! bah! it +would be _triste_--banal, tame! + +I admitted this, but urged that we were quiet people who wanted to be +married as quietly as possible, and that a tiger, for persons in our +condition of life, was a ridiculous piece of ostentation. It was +always better to begin as one meant to go on. + +She differed from me totally. I was too modest, for, of course, it was +incredible that I, who was so full of _sangfroid_, could object to the +tiger for any other reason? + +"Personally," I replied, "I had no prejudice against tigers +whatever--but Mademoiselle would understand that I was bound to +consider another person's convenience." + +"Not possible!" exclaimed Mademoiselle, "a young lady with so much +_verve_ to be timid! Why, Mons. Onion raved of her fearlessness!" + +I said it was not timidity in Lurana's case--she merely happened to +have an antipathy for tigers. Some people, as Mademoiselle was +doubtless aware, were unable to remain in the same room with a cat; +Miss de Castro could not stay in the same cage with a tiger--it was +temperament. + +"Ah," said Mdlle. Hortense, "I understand that. A sensitive?" + +"Yes," I said, "a sensitive." + +"But Niono says she is one of us!" objected Mademoiselle, "that she +was brought up amongst animals--that her mamma was herself an +animal-tamer." + +"Of white mice and canary birds," I said, "but that is not quite the +same thing as tigers, and I am perfectly certain that if that tiger is +retained, the wedding will not take place." + +Her keen grey eyes flashed with comprehension. Ah, the poor little +one! in that case it was another thing. She would speak to the +"Patron" and to Mons. Onion; the tiger should not be permitted to +trouble the fête. I could rely absolutely upon her--he should be +accommodated elsewhere. + +I went back to Lurana in a somewhat relieved frame of mind, and when +she asked me where I had been, I mentioned, perhaps unwisely, that I +had dropped in at the Circus and had a little chat with Mlle. Léonie. +I did not say anything about the tiger, because there seemed to be no +object in disturbing her, now that the matter was comfortably settled, +not to mention that if Lurana had known I had directed the removal of +the tiger without consulting her, she was quite self-willed enough to +insist on his immediate restoration to the lion-cage. + +Most girls would have been impressed by my courage in going near the +Circus at all at such a time; not so Lurana, who pretended to believe +that Mlle. Léonie was the attraction. + +"Oh, I noticed she was making eyes at you from the very beginning," +she declared; "you had better marry her, and then Mr Niono could +marry me. I daresay he would have no objection." + +"My darling," I said, gently, "do not let us quarrel the very last +evening we may spend together on earth." + +"You might take a more cheerful view of it than that, Theodore!" she +exclaimed. + +"I think you are a little inclined to treat it too lightly," I +replied. "I have been studying those lions, Lurana, and it is my +deliberate opinion that they are in a condition of suppressed +excitement which will break out on the slightest pretext. Unless you +can trust yourself to meet their gaze without faltering, without so +much as a flicker of the eyelid you will, unless I am greatly +mistaken, stand a considerable chance of being torn to pieces." + +"Nonsense, Theodore!" she said, "they can't possibly tell whether I am +meeting their gaze or not, or even shutting my eyes--for, of course, I +shall be wearing a veil." + +But _I_ should not--and it really did not seem fair. "I rather thought +of putting on a green shade myself," I said. It had only just occurred +to me. + +"Don't be absurd, Theodore!" she replied. "What _can_ you want with a +green shade?" + +"My eyes are not strong," I said, "and with those electric lights so +close to the cage, I _might_ blink or even close my eyes. A green +shade, like your bridal veil, would conceal the act!" + +"As if anybody ever _heard_ of a bridegroom with a green shade over +his eyes! I certainly will not enter that cage if I am to be made +publicly ridiculous!" + +"Do I understand," I said, very gravely, "that you _refuse_ to enter +the lion-cage?" + +"With a man in a green shade? Most certainly I refuse. Not otherwise." + +"Then you will sacrifice my life to mere appearances? Ah, Lurana, that +is only one more proof that vanity--not love--has led you to this +marriage!" + +"Why don't you own at once that you'd give anything to get out of it, +Theodore?" + +"It is you," I retorted, "_you_, Lurana, who are secretly dreading the +ordeal, and you are trying to throw the responsibility of giving up +the whole thing on me--it's not _fair_, you know!" + +"_I_ want to give up the whole thing? Theodore, you _know_ that isn't +true!" + +"Children, children!" said the Professor, who had been a silent and +unnoticed witness of our dispute till then, "What is this talk about +giving up the marriage? I implore you to consider the consequences, if +the wedding is broken off now by your default. You will be mobbed by a +justly indignant crowd, which will probably wreck the hall as a sign +of their displeasure. You are just now the two most prominent and +popular persons in the United Kingdom--you will become the objects of +universal derision. You will ruin that worthy and excellent man, Mr +Sawkins, offend Archibald Chuck, and do irretrievable damage to Miss +Rakestraw's prospects of success in journalism. Of myself I say +nothing, though I may mention that the persons who have paid me fancy +prices for the few seats which the management placed at my disposition +will infallibly demand restitution and damages. I might even be forced +to recover them from _you_, Theodore. On the other hand, by merely +facing a hardly appreciable danger for a very few minutes, you cover +yourselves with undying glory, you gain rich and handsome wedding +gifts, which I hear the proprietors intend to bestow upon you; you +receive an ovation such as is generally reserved for Royal nuptials; +and yet you, Theodore, would forfeit all this--for what? For a green +shade, which would probably only serve to infuriate the animals?" + +This had not struck me before, and I could not help seeing that there +was something in it. + +"I give up the shade," I said; "but I do think that Lurana is in such +a nervous and overstrung condition just now that it is not safe for +her to enter the cage without a medical certificate." + +Lurana laughed. "What for, Theodore? To satisfy the lions? Don't +distress yourself on my account--I am perfectly well. At the appointed +time I shall present myself at the--the altar. If you are not there to +receive me, to stand by my side in the sight of all, you lose me for +ever. A de Castro can never marry a Craven." + +She looked so splendid as she said this that I felt there was no peril +in the world that I would not face to gain her, that life without her +would be unendurable. + +Since she was as resolved as ever on this project, I must see it out, +that was all, and trust to luck to pull me through. Onion would be +there--and he understood lions; and, besides, there was always the +bare chance of the ceremony being stopped at the eleventh hour. + +I left early, knowing that I should require a good night's rest, and +Lurana and I parted, on the understanding that our next meeting would +be at the Agricultural Hall on the following afternoon. + +Whether it was due to a cup of coffee I had taken at the Professor's, +or to some other cause, I do not know, but I had a wretched night, +sleeping very literally in fits and starts, and feeling almost +thankful when it was time to get up. + +A cold bath freshened me up wonderfully, and, as they naturally did +not expect me in the City on my wedding-day, I had the whole morning +to myself, and decided to get through it by taking a brisk walk. +Before starting, I sent a bag containing my wedding garments to the +Agricultural Hall, where a dressing room had been reserved for me, and +then I started, viâ the Seven Sisters Road, for Finsbury Park. + +As I passed an optician's shop, I happened to see, hanging in the +window, several pairs of coloured spectacles, one of which I went in +and bought, and walked on with a sense of reassurance. Through the +medium of such glasses a lion would lose much of his terrors, and +would, at the same time, be unable to detect any want of firmness in +my gaze; indeed, if a wild beast can actually be dominated by a human +eye, how much more should he be so when that eye is reinforced by a +pair of smoked spectacles! + +[Illustration: "A de Castro can never marry a Craven."] + +My recollection of the rest of that walk is indistinct. I felt no +distress, only a kind of stupor. I tried to fix my thoughts on Lurana, +on her strange beauty, and the wondrous fact that in a very few hours +the ceremony, which was to unite us, would be, at all events, +_commenced_. But at times I had a pathetic sense of the irony which +decreed that I, a man of simple tastes and unenterprising disposition, +should have fallen hopelessly in love with the only young woman in the +United Kingdom capable of insisting on being married in a wild-beast +cage. + +It seemed hard, and I remember envying quite ordinary +persons--butchers, hawkers, errand-boys, crossing-sweepers, and the +like, for their good fortune in not being engaged to spend any part of +that afternoon in a den of forest-bred African lions. + +However, though there was nothing about the intentions of the Home +Office in the early editions of the evening papers, the officials +_might_ be preparing a dramatic _coup_ for the last moment. I was +determined not to count upon it--but the thought of it kept me up +until the time when I had to think of returning, for the idea of +flight never for an instant presented itself to me. I was on _parôle_ +as it were, and I preferred death by Lurana's side to dishonour and +security without her. + +So anxious was I not to be late, and also to discover whether any +communication from the Home Secretary had reached the manager, that I +almost hurried back to Islington. I was admitted to the Hall by a +private entrance, and shown to the kind of unroofed cabin in which I +was to change, and which, being under the balcony and at some distance +from the gangway between the stables and the ring, was comparatively +private and secluded. + +Here, after asking an assistant to let Mr Niono know I had arrived, +and would like to see him, I waited. The Circus had begun, as I knew +from the facts that the blare of the orchestrions was hushed, and that +a brass band overhead began and left off with the abruptness peculiar +to Circus music. + +Screens of board and canvas hid the auditorium from view, but I was +conscious of a vast multitude on the other side, vociferous and in the +best of humours. + +Between the strains of the orchestra and the rattling volleys of +applause, I heard the faint stamping and trampling from the stables, +and, a sound that struck a chill to my heart--the prolonged roar of +exasperation and _ennui_ which could only proceed from a bored lion. + +Then there was a rap at the door, which made me start, and Niono burst +in. + +"So you've found your way here," he said. "Feeling pretty fit? That's +the ticket! The bride ain't arrived yet, so you've lots of time." + +"You've heard nothing from the Home Office yet, I suppose?" I asked. + +"Not a word--and, between you and me, I made sure they meant to crab +the show. You've the devil's own luck!" + +"I have, indeed," I said, with feeling. "Still, we mustn't be too +sure--they may stop us yet!" + +"They may try it on--but our men have got their instructions. If they +_did_ come now, they wouldn't get near the ring till it was all over, +so don't you worry yourself about that." + +I said everything seemed to have been admirably arranged. "By the +way," I added, "where have you put the tiger?" + +"Do you mean old Rajah?" he said; and I replied that I _did_ mean old +Rajah. + +"Why, _he's_ all right--in the cage along with the others--where did +you _suppose_ he'd be--loose?" + +"I particularly requested," I explained, "that he might be put +somewhere else during the wedding. Mademoiselle promised that it +should be seen to." + +"It's nothing to do with Ma'amsell," he said, huffily; "_she_ don't +give orders here, Ma'amsell don't." + +"I mean, she promised to mention the matter to you," I said, more +diplomatically. + +"She never said nothing about it to _me_," he replied; "I expect she +forgot." + +"I can only say it was extremely careless of her," I said. "The fact +is, I have my doubts whether that tiger is to be trusted." + +"Well, you never can trust a tiger same as you can a lion," he +replied, candidly, "so I won't deceive you. But old Rajah ain't so +particular nasty--as tigers go." + +"He may not be," I said, "but, in Miss de Castro's interests, I must +beg you to shift him into some other cage till this affair is over. I +can't allow her to run any unnecessary risk." + +"I don't say you're wrong," he answered, "I wish I'd known before, I'd +have asked the gov'nor." + +[Illustration: "If them two got together, there'd be the doose's +delight."] + +"Ask him now," I urged, "surely you can put the tiger back in the +hospital cage for an hour or two." + +"The Jaguar's in there," he said; "he was a bit off colour, so we put +him there this morning. And if them two got together, there'd be the +doose's delight!" + +"Couldn't you put him somewhere else, then?" I suggested. + +"I _might_ ha' shunted him on to the Armadillo at a pinch," he said +thoughtfully, "_he_ wouldn't ha' taken any notice, but the gov'nor +would have to be consulted first,--and he's engaged in the ring. +Besides, it would take too much time to move old Rajah now--you must +put up with him, that's all. You'll be right enough if you keep your +head and stick close to me. I've taken care they've all had a good +dinner. I say," he broke off suddenly, "you're looking uncommon blue." + +"I don't _feel_ nervous," I said, "at least, not more nervous than a +man _ought_ to feel who's just about to be married. If you mean to +suggest that I'm going to show the white feather----!" + +"Not you," he said, "what would you _get_ by it, you know? After +billing this affair all over the town, we can't afford to disappoint +the public, and if I saw you hanging back--why I'm blest if I wouldn't +carry you into the cage myself." + +I retorted angrily that I would not put him to that inconvenience, +that I was as cool as he was, and that I did not understand his remark +that I was looking blue. + +"Lord, what a touchy chap you are!" he cried; "I meant looking blue +about the jaw, that's all. If I was you, I'd have a clean shave. It's +enough to put any lady off if she sees you with a chin like the barrel +of a musical-box." + +Somehow I had omitted to shave myself as usual that morning, intending +to get shaved later, but had forgotten to look for a hairdresser's +shop during my walk. + +"You'll find a razor in that drawer," he said, "if you don't mind +making shift with cold water, for there's no one about to fetch you +any hot. Now I must be off and get into my own togs. Make yourself at +home, you know. I'll give you another call later on." + +[Illustration: I was forlornly mopping when Niono returned.] + +Perhaps the razor was blunt, perhaps it was the cold water, anyhow I +inflicted a gash on the extreme point of my chin which bled profusely. +I dabbed and sluiced, but nothing I could do seemed to check the flow; +it went on, obstinate and irrepressible. I was still forlornly mopping +when Niono returned in his braided jacket, tights and Hessian boots, +whistling a tune. + +"The bride's just driven up," he announced, "looking like a +picture--what pluck she's got! I wish I was in your shoes! Ma'amsell's +taken her to her room. My word, though, you've given yourself a nasty +cut; got any spider's web about you? Stops it in no time." + +As I do not happen to go about festooned in cobwebs, his suggestion +was of little practical value, and so I intimated rather sharply. + +"Well, don't get in a fluster," he said, "we're only a couple of turns +off the Cage Act as it is; you slip into them spicy lavender trousers +and that classy frock-coat of yours as quick as you can, and I'll try +if I can't borrow a bit of courtplaster off one of our ladies." + +I had just put on a clean shirt when he was back again; "I could only +get goldbeater's skin," he remarked, "and precious little of that, so +be careful with it. And the parson's come, and would like to have a +look at the licence." + +I handed him the document, and tried to apply the goldbeater's skin, +which curled and shrivelled, and would stick to nothing but my +fingers--and still the hæmorrhage continued. + +"It's all over your shirt _now_!" said the lion-tamer, as if I was +doing it on purpose. "I wouldn't have had this happen for something. +Why, I've known 'em get excited with the _smell_ of blood, let alone +the sight of it." + +"Do you mean the lions?" I inquired, with a faint sick sensation. + +"Well, it was the _tiger_ my mind was running on more," was his gloomy +reply. + +My own mind began to run on the tiger too, and a most unpleasant form +of mental exercise it was. + +"After all," said Niono with an optimism that sounded a trifle forced, +"there's no saying. He _mayn't_ spot it. _None_ of 'em mayn't." + +"But what do you think yourself?" I could not help asking. + +"I couldn't give an opinion till we get inside," he answered, "but +we'll have the red hot irons handy in case he tries on any of his +games. And if you can't stop that chin of yours," he added, taking a +wrapper from his own neck and tossing it to me, "you'd better hide it +in this--they'll only think you've got a sore throat or something. But +do hurry up. I'm just going to see the old elephant put in the shafts, +and then I'll come back for you, so don't dawdle." + +Once more I was alone; I felt so chilly that I put on my old coat and +waistcoat again, for I did not venture to touch my new suit until my +chin left off bleeding, and it seemed inexhaustible, though the +precious minutes were slipping by faster and faster. + +The great building had grown suddenly silent; I could almost feel the +air vibrating with the suppressed excitement of the vast unseen crowd +which was waiting patiently for the lions, and Lurana--and me. + +Soon I heard a voice--probably a menagerie assistant's--in the passage +outside, and presently a shuffling tread approaching, and then I +perceived towering above the wooden partition, a huge grey bulk, +ridged and fissured like a mountain side, and touched where the light +fell on it with a mouldy bloom--it was the elephant on his way to be +attached to the lion-cage! + +I stared helplessly up at his uncouth profile, with the knobby +forehead worn to a shiny black, and the sardonic little eye that met +mine with a humorous intelligence, as though recommending me to haste +to the wedding. + +He plodded past, and I realised that I had no time to change now; my +new wedding suit was a useless extravagance--I must go to the altar as +I was. Niono would be back to fetch me in a moment. Lurana would never +forgive me for keeping her waiting. + +Hastily I wound the muffler round my neck till my chin was hidden in +its folds, and put on my hat. Could I have mislaid the spectacles? No, +thank heaven, they were in the pocket of my great coat. I put them on, +and my wedding toilet--such as it was--was complete. + +Then I cast a hurried glance at myself in a tarnished mirror nailed +against the matchboarding, and staggered back in dismay. I was +not merely unrecognisable; I was--what is a thousand times +worse--_ridiculous_! + +[Illustration: My wedding toilette was complete.] + +Yes, no bridegroom in the world could hope to make a creditable +appearance with his nose only just showing above a worsted comforter +and his eyes hidden behind a pair of smoked spectacles. It was enough +to make any lion roar--the audience would receive me with howls! + +I had been prepared--I was still prepared--for Lurana's dear sake, to +face the deadliest peril. But to do so with a total loss of dignity; +to be irresistibly comic in the supreme crisis, to wrestle with wild +beasts to the accompaniment of peals of Homeric laughter--would any +lover in the world be capable of heroism such as that? + +True, I might remove the spectacles--but in that case I could not +trust my nerve; or I might take off the muffler but then I could not +trust the tiger. And in either case I should be courting not only my +own destruction, but that of one whose life was far dearer to me than +my own. + +I asked myself solemnly whether I had the right to endanger her +safety, simply from a selfish unwillingness to appear grotesque in her +eyes and those of the audience. The answer was what every rightminded +reader will have foreseen. + +And, seeing that the probability was that Lurana would absolutely +decline to go through the ceremony at all with the guy I now appeared +(for had she not objected even to my assuming a green shade, which +was, comparatively, becoming), it was obvious that only one +alternative remained, and that I took. + +Cautiously opening the door of my cabin, I looked up and down the +passage. At one end I could just see the elephant surrounded by a +crowd of grooms and helpers, who were presumably harnessing him to the +cage and were too far away or too much engaged to notice me. At the +other were a few deserted stalls and rifle-galleries, whose +proprietors had all gone to swell the crowd of spectators who were +waiting to see as much as they could of my wedding, and it began to +seem likely that they would see very little indeed. + +I was about to make for the nearest exit when I remembered that it +would probably be guarded, so, assuming as far as possible the air of +an ordinary visitor, I slipped quietly up a broad flight of stairs, on +each of which was a recommendation to try somebody's "Pink Pills for +Pale People," and gained the upper gallery without attracting +attention. + +I felt instinctively that my best chance of escaping detection was to +mingle with the crowd, and besides, I was naturally curious to know +how the affair would end, so, seeing a door and pigeon-hole with the +placard "Balcony Seats, Sixpence," I went in, and was lucky enough to +secure the only cane bottom chair left in the back row. + +After removing my spectacles, I had a fairly good view of the ring +below, with its brown tan enclosed by a white border cushioned along +the top in faded crimson. The reserved stalls were all full, and +beyond the barriers, the crowd swayed and surged in a dense black +mass. Nobody was inside the ring except a couple of nondescript grooms +in scarlet liveries, who hung about with an air of growing +embarrassment. The orchestra opposite was reiterating "The Maiden's +Prayer" with a perseverance that at length got upon the nerves of the +audience, which began to stamp suggestively. + +"It's a swindle," said a husky man, who was obviously inclined to +scepticism, and also sherry, "a reg'lar take in! There won't be nobody +married in a lion's cage--I've said so all along." + +"Oh, it's too soon to say that yet!" I replied soothingly, though I +had reasons for being of the same opinion, "they're a little behind +time, that's all." + +[Illustration: It's a swindle.] + +"I dunno _what_ it is they're behind," he said,--"but they don't mean +comin' out. There, what did I _tell_ you?" + +One of the grooms, obeying instructions from without, had just gone to +the Indicator-post, removed the number corresponding with that of the +wedding programme, and substituted another, which was the signal for a +general uproar. + +A carpet was spread for a performance by a "Bender," who made his +appearance in a tight suit of green spangles, as the "Marvellous Boy +Serpent," and endeavoured to wile away the popular discontent by +writhing in and out of the rungs of a chair, and making a glittering +pincushion of himself. In vain, for they would have none of him, and +the poor youth had to return at last amidst a storm of undeserved +hissing. + +Another long wait followed, and the indignation grew louder. So +infectious is the temper of a mob that I actually caught myself +growing impatient, and banging loudly on the floor with my +umbrella--just as my neighbours were doing! + +All at once, to my extreme bewilderment, the stamping and hooting +changed to tumultuous applause, the band began to bray out an air that +was apparently intended for "The Voice that Breathed," the barriers +were thrown open, and the great elephant lumbered into the arena +drawing the cage. + +The brute had an enormous wedding favour attached to each side of his +tusks, and all the animals in the cage, down to the very tiger, were +wearing garlands of artificial orange-blossom, a touch of sentiment +which seemed to go straight to the hearts of the people. + +But even while I looked down into the cage, with much the same +reflection as that of John Bradford of old, that there, but for +special grace, I might myself be figuring, I was astounded by the +audacity of the management. + +Could they really imagine that an intelligent and enlightened audience +like this would be pacified by anything less than the spectacle they +had paid to witness--a marriage solemnised in a den of lions? And how +did they propose to perform a ceremony at which, as they must be fully +aware by this time, the bridegroom would be conspicuous by his +absence? No, it might be magnificent, but it was not business. + +I was still speculating, when a kind of small procession entered the +arena. First came Mr Sawkins, with the Reverend Ninian, looking rather +like a cheap Cranmer; next was a smart-looking person in a well-cut +frock-coat and lavender trousers that I seemed to have seen before. It +was my wedding suit; the wearer had gummed on a moustache and short +side-whiskers which gave him a spurious resemblance to myself, but if +nobody else knew him, I did--it was Onion, the Lion King! + +And the next moment, I received a still greater shock, as Professor +Polkinghorne followed with the lofty bearing of a Virginius, and on +his arm was a slender shrinking figure, which, in spite of the veil +she wore, I knew too well could be no other than Lurana. + +"There's the bridegroom, d'ye see!" explained my hoarse neighbour; +"he's a deal better lookin' than the pictures they've drawed of him in +the papers. But he's as pale as plaster, he'll back out of it at the +last moment--you just see if he don't!" + +But I knew Niono better. I remembered his open admiration of Lurana, +his envy at my good fortune, I felt convinced that his pallor was +merely due to the absence of rouge and the fear that he would not +succeed in his daring imposture. For I saw now that he had been +planning to supplant me from the first; hence his attempts to shake my +nerve, and, when they failed, hence his treacherous loan of a blunt +razor. He was staking everything on the chance that the bride's +natural agitation, and the thickness of her veil would prevent her +from suspecting that he was a fraudulent bridegroom until the ceremony +was over, while the audience, not expecting to see a Lion King in a +tall hat, would be equally deceived. + +[Illustration: A kind of small procession entered the arena.] + +"Pore young things!" said a stout female in front, with a nodding +feather in her bonnet; "it's to be 'oped there won't be any +unpleasantness, I'm sure. I'm 'alf sorry I came." + +There was time even yet; I had but to rise, denounce the usurper, and +take my rightful place at Lurana's side. I felt strongly impelled to +do so; I actually stood up and tried to speak. But I realised that it +was hopeless to attempt to make my feeble voice heard above the +thunders of applause, even if excitement and emotion had not rendered +me speechless. Besides, what satisfactory explanation of my present +position could I offer? I sat down again with a sense of spellbound +helplessness. + +I looked on as the great arc-lamps were lowered, hissing and buzzing, +to the level of the cage, and the Reverend Mr Skipworth prepared to +ascend the inverted white tub that was to serve him as a reading-desk, +and the unscrupulous Onion took the bride by the hand and conducted +her to the steps which led to the door of the lion-cage. + +"They're never goin' in among all them lions without nobody with +them!" cried the stout lady. "It's downright temptin' of Providence, +that it is!" + +"Don't you be afraid," said the cynical man. "_They_ ain't goin' in. +Just look at _that_ now!" + +As he spoke two persons in plain clothes, who had apparently been +waiting for this moment, stepped over the barrier from the shilling +stalls into the ring, and, from their gestures, seemed to be insisting +that the wedding should not take place inside the cage at all events. + +There was an animated dispute in the ring; Niono blustered, Lurana +pleaded, Sawkins expostulated, and the professor and Archibald Chuck +(who had contrived to push himself into the party) argued, while Miss +Rakestraw filled page after page of her reporter's note-book, and the +Rev. Ninian sat upon his tub with meekly folded hands, looking more +than ever like a martyr who knew himself to be incombustible. + +The audience booed, and hissed, and yelled with natural rage and +disappointment; the lions remained unmoved, blinking behind their +bars, with crossed forepaws, and an air of serene indifference. + +"I told yer there wasn't going to be no blooming wedding!" said my +husky friend. "It's a reg'lar put-up job, that's what it is!" + +It was possible; but whether the interrupters of the proceedings were +hired supers or genuine officials, it was equally clear that there +would be no wedding inside the cage. + +How bitterly I regretted that by yielding to an irresistible impulse I +had forfeited the right to stand by Lurana's side at this supreme +moment! I could have done so with absolute impunity; I should have won +a lifelong reputation for courage; Lurana herself would have owned +that I had done all that was possible to gratify her whim, and would +have consented to marry me in the orthodox fashion. + +Whereas, here I was, separated from her by impassable barriers, in the +ignominious seclusion of a back seat! However, this official +prohibition had at least solved one of my difficulties; it had +rendered it unnecessary for me to interfere personally. + +The storm of indignation rose to a hurricane when the entire wedding +party filed out of the arena with the officials, doubtless to discuss +the matter in greater privacy. + +The stout lady with the feather was particularly annoyed. "Why +shouldn't the two young parties be allowed to please themselves?" she +wanted to know. "It was _their_ wedding, not the Government's. But it +was always the way whenever she came out for a little amusement. +Somethink was bound to go wrong." + +Another long interval, during which the wildest disorder reigned +unchecked, the crowd, with the irrationality of an angry mob, actually +throwing pieces of orange-peel at the unoffending lions as the only +creatures within the range of their displeasure. The hubbub was at its +height when Sawkins reappeared and held up his hand for some time in +vain before he could obtain a hearing. Then he addressed the audience +as follows: + +"Ladies and Gentlemen," he said, "certain individuals claiming to +represent the Home Office and the London County Council" (here there +were groans, and my neighbour remarked disgustedly, that "that was +what came of returning those Progressives") "have protested against a +wedding in the cage as involving danger to the principal parties +concerned." (Loud cries of "Shame!" and general uproar.) "I have the +honour and pleasure to announce that we have succeeded in convincing +these gentlemen that the proposed ceremony is no more open to +objection than the ordinary performance, and that they have no legal +power to prohibit it. Consequently the marriage will now be celebrated +in the cage of forest-bred African lions, as advertised." + +[Illustration: Then he addressed the audience.] + +The revulsion of feeling after this most unexpected announcement was +instant and tremendous; all hearts seemed touched with generous +compunction for their uncharitable suspicions, and the hall rang with +tumultuous cheers. + +For myself, I could not share the general exhilaration. This +preposterous wedding was permitted after all, and, unless Lurana's +heart failed her at the critical instant, she would inevitably be lost +to me for ever! I might still interpose; indeed I should have done so +at all costs, but for a timely remembrance that no action I took now +would regain her. + +She might have been in ignorance before--but in the course of this +delay she must have learnt that I had failed her, she must have +accepted the lion-tamer as a substitute, and, even if I were to +present myself, she would only inform me that my place was already +filled. I had too much spirit to risk a public snub of that kind, so I +stayed where I was. It cannot have fallen to many men's lot to look on +as passive spectators at their own wedding--but what choice had I? + +There was a deathlike silence as Niono slipt the bolt and gallantly +handed the bride into the cage. She stepped in as collectedly as if it +had been an ordinary Registry Office, and the great tawny beasts +retreated sullenly to the other end, where they stood huddled in a +row, while the Rev. Ninian, mounting his tub, read an abbreviated form +of service in a voice which was quite inaudible in the balcony. + +I tried to turn my eyes away from the scene that was taking place in +that grim cage, and the two figures that were so calmly confronting +those formidable brutes--but I felt compelled to look. And it was +mortifying to see how trifling after all was the danger they incurred. +I am afraid I almost wished that one of the animals would give some +trouble--I don't mean of course by any actual attack--but by just +enough display of ferocity to make Lurana understand what they _might_ +do. + +But they never even attempted to cross the pole which had been thrust +across the cage as a barrier. I was never told there _would_ be a +pole! They looked on, mystified--as well they might be--by proceedings +to which they were totally unaccustomed, but still impressed, and +sleepily solemn. Even the tiger behaved with irreproachable decorum. + +I understood then what Onion had been careful not to mention; their +food had been doctored in some way. If I had only known! _Anybody_ +could beard a hocussed lion! + +And soon the words which made that couple man and wife were +pronounced, or rather mumbled--for the Rev. Ninian would have been +none the worse for a course of lessons from old Polkinghorne--and the +newly-wedded pair came out of the cage without so much as a scratch, +to the triumphant blare of the "Wedding March." There was frantic +applause as the Professor embraced the bride with an emotion that +struck me as overdone, while the Rev. Ninian, Miss Rakestraw, and +Chuck, offered their congratulations and Mr Sawkins presented the +happy couple with a silver biscuit-box (it may have been +electro-plated), and a Tantalus spirit case. + +But for that unfortunate slip of the razor, those gifts would have +been mine--but I was in no mood to think of that just then, when I had +lost what was so infinitely more precious. + +I looked on dully till the party left the arena, declining with +excellent taste to return in answer to repeated calls and bow their +acknowledgments, and then, as the electric lights were hoisted up +again and the elephant was led in to remove the lion's cage, I thought +it was time to go. + +It was all over; there was nothing to stay for now, and most of the +people were leaving, so I joined the crowd which streamed down the +staircase and along the broad passage to the main exit. Once in the +open air, I hurried blindly past the flaring shops in the High Street, +neither knowing nor caring where I was going, with only one thought +possessing my numbed brain--how different it might all have been if +only things had happened otherwise! + +Wherever I looked I saw Lurana's lovely scornful face and flashing +eyes painted with torturing vividness on the murky air. How flat and +stale all existence would be for me henceforth! Life with Lurana might +not have been all sunshine; it might have had its storms, even its +tempests--but at least it would never have been dull! + +I cursed the treachery which had induced her to link herself for life +with a lion-tamer. Happy, I knew she could not be, for of one thing I +was confident--she loved me; not perhaps with the passionate +single-hearted devotion I felt for her, but still with a love she +would never feel for any other. Perhaps she was already beginning to +repent her desertion of me, and wishing she could undo that rash +irrevocable act. + +I was pounding up Highgate Hill, with no object beyond escaping by +active motion the demons of recollection and regret that haunted +me--when suddenly, as I gained the top of the hill, a thought struck +me. _Was_ the act irrevocable after all? Was it so absolutely certain +that this Onion had the legal right to claim her as his wife? + +He had certainly personated me. Had he borrowed, not only my frock +coat, and trousers, but also my name for the ceremony? If he had, and +if Lurana was, as she could hardly help being, aware of the fact, it +did not require much acquaintance with the law to know that there was +a chance, at all events, of getting the Court to declare the marriage +null and void. + +But he might have been married in his own name; I could not tell, +owing to the indistinctness of Mr Skipworth's utterance, only Lurana +or those in their immediate neighbourhood could say. I must know that +first; I must examine the register, if there was one, and then, if--if +Lurana wished to be saved, I might be able to save her. + +I knew that a sort of wedding high-tea had been prepared at Canonbury +Square, where the whole party would be assembled by this time, and I +hurried back to Canonbury Square as fast as the tramcar would take me. +My blood was roused; she would not be Niono's if I could prevent it. I +would snatch her from him, even if I had to do so across the +wedding-cake! + +But when I reached the well-known door and raised the familiar +knocker--a fist clutching a cast-iron wreath--in my trembling fingers, +there were no sounds of festivity within; the house was dark and +deserted. + +I waited in the bitter January air; the street lamp opposite--the +identical one under which Lurana had first agreed to marry +me--flickered at every gust of the night wind, as though troubled on +my account. They must have transferred the feast to the Circus, or to +some adjacent restaurant; evidently there was no one there. + +I was just turning hopelessly away, when I heard the bolt being +withdrawn, and the door was opened by a maid. + +"Where is your mistress?" I asked breathlessly. I could not bring +myself to ask for Lurana as Mrs Onion. + +"In the drawing-room, upstairs," was the unexpected reply, "with the +'istericks." + +So long as she was not with Niono, I cared little; I bounded up, and +found her alone. + +As I entered, she raised her flushed, tear-stained face from the +shabby sofa on which she had thrown herself. "Go away!" she cried, +"why do you come near me now? You have no right--do you hear?--no +right!" + +"I know," I said humbly enough, "I deserve this, no doubt; and yet, if +you knew all, you would find excuses for me, Lurana!" + +"None, Theodore," she said; "if you had really loved me, you would +never have deserted me!" + +"I could not help myself," I retorted; "and really, Lurana, if it +comes to desertion----!" + +"Ah, what is the use of wrangling about whose fault it was," she +moaned, "now, when we have both wrecked our lives! At least, I know +I've wrecked _mine_! Why was I so insane as to set my heart on our +being married in a den of disgusting lions? If you had only been +firmer, Theodore, instead of giving way as you did!" + +"At least it was not cowardice," I said. "When I show you the state of +my chin----" + +"Theodore!" she cried, with a little scream, "you are hurt! Tell me; +was it the tiger?" + +"It was not the tiger," I said. "Never mind that now. I was betrayed +by that infernal Onion, Lurana. I never knew till it was too late--you +_do_ believe me, don't you?" + +"I do; we were both deceived, Theodore. I should never have acted as I +did if that horrid Frenchwoman hadn't told me--Oh, _what_ would I not +give if all this had never been?" + +"If you are truly sincere," I began, "in wishing this unlucky marriage +cancelled----" + +"If I am! Are _you_, Theodore? Oh, if only there is a way!" + +"There may be, Lurana. It all depends on whether my name was used at +the ceremony or not. Try to recollect and tell me." + +"But I can't, Theodore. You were there--you must know!" + +"Mr Skipworth wouldn't speak up; and I was much farther away than you +were." + +"Than _I_ was, Theodore! But--but I wasn't there at all!" + +"Not present at your own wedding?" I cried, "but I saw you!" + +"It was not me!" she said, "it was Mlle. Léonie. Is it possible you +didn't know?" + +My heart leaped. "For heaven's sake, explain, Lurana; let us have no +more concealments." + +"When I arrived," she said, "Mademoiselle explained about the tiger, +and how sorry she was it was too late to remove it, since she +understood I had an antipathy to tigers; and I said, not at all, I +adored tigers, so she took me to see the cage, and I--I only tried to +tickle the tiger, but he was so dreadfully cross about it--I nearly +fainted. And she said it was simply madness for me to go in, and that +you were every bit as frightened as I was." + +[Illustration: "If only you had been firmer, Theodore."] + +"She had no right to say that," I said; "it's absolutely untrue!" + +"I know, Theodore," she replied; "you have proved that you, at least, +are no coward--but I believed her then. And I wrote you a line to say +that I had altered my mind, and did not think it right to expose you +or myself to such danger, and that I would wait for you by the +Myddelton Statue. She promised to give you the letter at once!" + +"I never got it," I said. + +"No, she took care you should not. And I waited for you--how long I +don't know--_hours_, it seemed--but you never came! Then I saw the +people beginning to come out, and--and I went across and asked someone +whether there had been any marriage or not, and he said, 'Yes, it had +gone off without any accident, the bridegroom looked pale but was +plucky enough, and so was the bride, though he couldn't tell how _she_ +looked, because of her veil.' And then of course, I knew that the +deceitful cat had taken my place and managed to make you marry her! +And at first I wanted to go back and stab her with my hat pin, but I +hadn't one sharp enough, so I came home instead. And oh, Theodore, I +_do_ feel so ashamed! After boasting so much of my Spanish blood, and +taunting you with being afraid as I did, to think that you should have +shown the truer courage after all!" + +I could not triumph over her then; I was too happy. "Courage, my +darling, is a merely relative quality," I said. "Heaven forbid that we +should be held accountable for the state of our nerves--even the +bravest of us." + +"But this marriage, Theodore," she said, "what can you do to have it +set aside?" + +"Do! Nothing," I replied; "after what you have told me, I no longer +care to try." + +"You despise me, then, because I broke down at the critical moment?" + +"Not at all. I can never be grateful enough to you!" + +"Grateful! Then do you mean to say you prefer that coarse, +middle-aged, lion-taming person to me, Theodore?" + +"Lurana," I said, "prepare yourself for a great surprise--a _pleasant_ +surprise. If anybody is now that lady's lawful husband it is +Niono--not I; and a very suitable match too," I added (I saw now why +the authorities had been compelled to waive their objections to it). +"The fact is, I never went into the cage at all." + +"You didn't go into the cage, Theodore! but how, why?" + +"Do you imagine," I asked, "can you really suppose I should be capable +of entering that cage with anybody but yourself, Lurana? How little +you know me! Of _course_ I declined!" + +"But you didn't know I had run away _then_, Theodore! Why, you thought +only a few minutes ago _I_ was the person Mr Niono married! Perhaps +you will kindly explain?" + +For the moment I was in a fix, but I saw that the moment had arrived +for perfect candour, and accordingly I told her the facts pretty much +as they have been set down here. + +She could hardly blame me for having behaved precisely as she herself +had done, or refuse to admit that by taking any other course I should +have imperilled our joint happiness, and yet I thought I could see +that, with feminine unreason, she was just a _little_ disappointed +with me. + +The true explanation of that marriage, if it was a marriage, in the +den of lions, I have never been able to discover, nor for that matter +have I been particularly curious to inquire whether Onion attempted to +get rid of me in order to secure Lurana; whether Mdlle. Léonie played +upon Lurana's fears with the hope of becoming my bride, or his; or +whether the Lion King and his fellow artist gallantly sacrificed +themselves to get the management out of a difficulty, I don't know, +and, as I say, I haven't cared to ask. + +But however it was, they were ably seconded by old Polkinghorne, who +was naturally unwilling to be called upon to refund the money he had +got for his free tickets, and by Miss Rakestraw and Archibald Chuck, +whose reputations were also more or less concerned. + +Nevertheless, although every effort was made to keep the public off +the scent, and the circus people behaved, I am bound to say, with +commendable discretion, sundry garbled versions of the facts _did_ get +about, and altogether Lurana and I have found the task of denying or +correcting them such a constant nuisance that I have felt compelled, +as I said at starting, to furnish, once for all, a statement of what +actually occurred. + +Now that it is written I have no more to add, except to append a +cutting from an announcement which appeared not long ago in the +principal papers. The arrangements for its publication were entrusted +to Archibald Chuck, who I think must have added the last two words on +his own responsibility. + + _Blenkinsop_--_De Castro_.--On the 15th inst., at the Parish + Church of St Mary, Islington, by the Rev. Merton Sandford, + D.D., Vicar, THEODORE PIDGLEY BLENKINSOP, of Highbury, to + LURANA CARMEN DE CASTRO, only daughter of the late Manuel + Guzman de Castro, formerly Deputy Sub-Assistant Inspector of + Spanish Liquorice to the Government Manufactory at Madrid. No + lions. + + THE END. + + + PRINTED BY + + TURNBULL AND SPEARS, + + EDINBURGH + + + + +Transcriber's Note: + + +Inconsistent and archaic spelling retained. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Love Among the Lions, by F. 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