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diff --git a/37972-h/37972-h.htm b/37972-h/37972-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..2539e7d --- /dev/null +++ b/37972-h/37972-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,9136 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=ISO-8859-1" /> +<title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Sunshine Jane, by Anne Warner</title> + <style type="text/css"> + +body { + margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + } + +h1 { + margin-top: 7%; + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; + clear: both; +} +h1.pg { + margin-top: 0%; + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; + clear: both; +} + +h2 { + margin-top: 4%; + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; + clear: both; +} + +/* paragraphs */ + +p { + margin-top: 3%; + margin-bottom: 3%; + text-align: justify; +} /* general paragraph */ + +p.h1 { + margin-top: 7%; + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; + font-size: 300%; + font-weight: bold; +} + +p.h2 { + margin-top: 7%; + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; + font-size: 150%; + font-weight: bold; +} + +p.h2a { + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; + font-size: 150%; + font-weight: bold; +} /* h2 type without top margin */ + +p.h3 { + margin-top: 7%; + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; + font-size: 100%; + font-weight: bold; +} + +p.h3a { + margin-top: 7%; + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: left; + font-size: 150%; + font-weight: bold; +} + +p.indent { + text-indent: 4%; +} /* indented paragraph */ + +p.margin-left8 +{ + margin-left: 20%; +} /* text unindented with medium indentation of paragraph */ + +/* horizontal rules */ + +hr { + width: 33%; + margin-top: 8%; + margin-bottom: 8%; + margin-left: auto; + margin-right: auto; + clear: both; +} + +.hr1 +{ + width: 25%; + margin-top: 0%; + margin-bottom: 0%; +} /* small horizontal rule */ + +.hr2 +{ + width: 90%; + max-width: 90%; + color: #CCCCCC; + background-color: #FFFFFF; + border: none; + border-bottom: 6px double black; + margin: 8% auto; +} /* horizontal rule for chapter divisions */ + +/* tables */ + +.pagenum { + position: absolute; + left: 92%; + font-size: smaller; + text-align: right; +} /* page numbers */ + +/* block quotes and notes */ +.blockquot { + margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; +} + +.center { + text-indent: 0%; + text-align: center; +} + +.smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} + +/* Links attributes */ + +a:link { color:#000000; text-decoration: none; border-bottom: 1px dashed #808080;} + +a:visited { color:#25383C; text-decoration: none; border-bottom: 1px dashed #808080;} + +a:hover { color:#008000; text-decoration: none; border-bottom: 1px dashed #808080;} + +a:active { color:#000000; text-decoration: none; border-bottom: 1px dashed #808080;} + +ins {text-decoration: none; border-bottom: 1px dashed #dcdcdc;} + +/* Images */ + +img { + padding: 6px; +} /* without border */ + +img.border{ + border: 1px solid black; + padding: 6px; +} /* with border */ + +.figcenter { + margin: auto; + text-align: center; +} + +/* Other */ + +span.ralign { + position: absolute; + right: 10%; + top: auto; +} + +.TOCR { + list-style-type:upper-roman; + margin-left: 10%; + color:black; +} + +div.tnote { + border-style: dotted; + margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + padding: 1%; + font-style: normal; + font-size: 70%; + text-align: justify; +} + + hr.full { width: 100%; + margin-top: 3em; + margin-bottom: 0em; + margin-left: auto; + margin-right: auto; + height: 4px; + border-width: 4px 0 0 0; /* remove all borders except the top one */ + border-style: solid; + border-color: #000000; + clear: both; } + pre {font-size: 85%;} + </style> +</head> +<body> +<h1 class="pg">The Project Gutenberg eBook, Sunshine Jane, by Anne Warner, Illustrated by +Harriet Roosevelt Richards</h1> +<pre> +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at <a href = "http://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a></pre> +<p>Title: Sunshine Jane</p> +<p>Author: Anne Warner</p> +<p>Release Date: November 10, 2011 [eBook #37972]</p> +<p>Language: English</p> +<p>Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1</p> +<p>***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SUNSHINE JANE***</p> +<p> </p> +<h4 class="center">E-text prepared by Suzanne Shell, Ernest Schaal,<br /> + and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team<br /> + (<a href="http://www.pgdp.net">http://www.pgdp.net</a>)<br /> + from page images generously made available by<br /> + Internet Archive/American Libraries<br /> + (<a href="http://www.archive.org/details/americana">http://www.archive.org/details/americana</a>)</h4> +<p> </p> +<p> </p> +<hr class="full" /> +<p> </p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 455px;"> +<img class="border" src="images/cover.jpg" width="455" height="700" alt="book cover" title="book cover" /> +</div> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<h1>SUNSHINE JANE</h1> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 466px;"> + <img class="border" src="images/fronti.jpg" width="466" height="700" + alt="" title="" /> +<p class="center">"Auntie Susan, it's Aunt Matilda and Mr. Beamer."<br /> +<span class="smcap">Frontispiece.</span> <i>See Page 265.</i></p> +</div> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p class="h1">SUNSHINE JANE</p> + +<p class="h2">BY<br /> +ANNE WARNER</p> + +<p class="h3">AUTHOR OF "THE REJUVENATION OF AUNT MARY," "SUSAN +CLEGG AND HER FRIEND, MRS. LATHROP," ETC.</p> + +<p class="h3">WITH FRONTISPIECE BY<br /> +HARRIET ROOSEVELT RICHARDS</p> +<p> </p> +<p> </p> +<p> </p> + +<p class="h2">BOSTON<br /> +LITTLE, BROWN, AND COMPANY<br /> +1914</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p class="center"><i>Copyright, 1913, 1914</i>,<br /> +<span class="smcap">By Little, Brown, and Company</span>.</p> + +<hr class="hr1"/> + +<p class="center"><i>All rights reserved</i></p> + +<p class="center">Published, February, 1914</p> + +<p class="center">Reprinted, January, 1914</p> + +<p class="center">Set up and electrotyped by J. S. Cushing Co., Norwood, Mass., U.S.A.<br /> +Presswork by S. J. Parkhill & Co., Boston, Mass., U.S.A.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg v]</span></p> + +<p class="center">CONTENTS</p> + +<p class="margin-left8">CHAPTER <span class="ralign">PAGE</span></p> + +<ul class="TOCR"> + +<li><span class="smcap">General Ignorance</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#I">1</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Everybody Gets There</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#II">6</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Matilda Teaches</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#III">22</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Jane Begins Sunshining</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#IV">37</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">A Change in the Feel of Things</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#V">61</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Lorenzo Rath</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#VI">84</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">A New Outlook on Matilda</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#VII">98</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Soul-uplifting</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#VIII">127</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Madeleine's Secret</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#IX">138</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Old Mrs. Croft</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#X">148</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">She Sleeps</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XI">159</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Emily's Project</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XII">169</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Emily is Herself Freely</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XIII">191</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Jane's Converts</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XIV">208</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="pagenum">[Pg vi]</span><span class="smcap">Real Conversation</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XV">220</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">The Most Wonderful Thing ever Happened</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XVI">233</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">Why Jane Should have Believed</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XVII">243</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">In a Perfectly Right Way</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XVIII">256</a></span></li> + +<li><span class="smcap">The Results</span> <span class="ralign"><a href="#XIX">277</a></span></li> + +</ul> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p class="h1">SUNSHINE JANE</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 1]</span></p> + +<p class="h1">SUNSHINE JANE</p> + +<h2><a name="I" id="I"></a>CHAPTER I</h2> + +<p class="h2a">GENERAL IGNORANCE</p> + +<p class="indent">THERE was something pathetic in the +serene unconsciousness of the little +village as the stage came lumbering down +the hillside, bearing its freight of portent. +So many things were going to be changed +forever after,—and no one knew it. Such +a vast difference was going speedily to make +itself felt, and not a soul was aware even +of what a bigger soul it was so soon to be. +Old Mrs. Croft, clear at the other end of +town and paralyzed for twenty years, +hadn't the slightest conception of what a +leading part was being prepared for her +to play. Poor Katie Croft, her daughter-in-law +and slave, whose one prayer was for +freedom, dreamed not that the answer was +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 2]</span> +now at last coming near. Mrs. Cowmull, +sitting on her porch awaiting the "artist +who had advertised," knew not who or +what or how old he might be or the interest +that would soon be hers. Poor Emily +Mead, shelling peas on the bench at the +back of her mother's house, frowned fretfully +and, putting back her great lock of +rich chestnut hair with an impatient gesture, +wished that she might see "just one real +man before she died,"—and the man was +even then jolting towards her. Miss Debby +Vane, putting last touches to the flowers +on her guest-room table, where Madeleine +would soon see them, was also sweetly +unaware of the approach of momentous +events. She thought but of Madeleine, +the distant cousin whose parents wanted +to see if absence would break up an obnoxious +love affair, and so were sending her +to Miss Debby, who was "only too pleased."</p> + +<p class="indent">"A love affair," she whispered rapturously. +"A <i>real</i> love affair in this town!" +And then she pursed her lips delightfully, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 3]</span> +never guessing that she was to see so much +besides.</p> + +<p class="indent">Meanwhile Miss Matilda Drew stood +looking sternly out of her sister Susan's +window, considering if there were any +necessary yet up to now forgotten point +to be impressed upon Jane the instant +that she should arrive. Miss Matilda was +naturally as ignorant as all the rest,—as +ignorant even as poor Susan, lying primly +straight behind her on the bed. Susan +was a widow and an invalid, not paralyzed +like old Mrs. Croft, but pretty helpless. +Matilda had lived with her for five years +and tended her assiduously, as she grew +more and more feeble. Now Matilda was +"about give out," and—"just like a +answer out of a clear sky," as Matilda said—their +niece Jane, whom neither had seen +since she was a mite in curls fifteen years +ago, had written to ask if she might spend +her holiday with them. They had said +"Yes," and Matilda was going away for a +rest while Jane kept house and waited on +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 4]</span> +her poor old aunt. Jane was one of the +passengers now rattling along in the stage. +She differed widely from the others and +from every one else in the village, but all +put together, they formed that mass known +to literature as "the situation." I think +myself that it was the rest that formed +"the situation" and that Jane formed +"the key," but I may be prejudiced. +Anyway, "key" or not, Miss Matilda's +niece was a sweet, brown-skinned, bright-haired +girl, with a happy face, great, +beautiful eyes, and a heart that beat every +second in truer accord with the great +working principles of the universe. She +was the only one among them now who had +a foot upon the step that led to the path +"higher up." And yet because she was +the only one, she had seen her way to come +gladly and teach them what they had never +known; not only that, but also to learn +of them the greatest lesson of her own life. +So we see that although conscious of both +hands overflowing with gifts, Jane really +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 5]</span> +was as ignorant, in God's eyes, as all the +rest. She had gone far enough beyond +the majority to know that to give is the +divinest joy which one may know, but she +had not gone far enough to realize that in +the greatest outpouring of generosity which +we can ever give vent to, a vacuum is +created which receives back from those we +benefit gifts way beyond the value of our +own. "I shall bring so much happiness +here," ran the undercurrent of her thought; +she never imagined that Fate had brought +her to this simple village to fashion herself +unto better things.</p> + +<p class="indent">So all, alike unaware—those in the +stage and those awaiting its advent with +passengers and post—drew long, relieved +breaths as it passed with rattle and clatter +over the bridge and into the main street.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 6]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="II" id="II"></a>CHAPTER II</h2> + +<p class="h2a">EVERYBODY GETS THERE</p> + +<p class="indent">JANE sat on the rear seat with old Mr. +Cattermole, who was coming home +to his daughter, Mrs. Mead.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Ever been here before?" old Mr. Cattermole +asked her.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, never."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Hey?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, never."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Once?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Never."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Never!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll tell you what it is," said Mr. Cattermole, +beaming benevolently, "it's the +jolting. It keeps me from hearing what +you say."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane nodded, smiling.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 7]</span>But old Mr. Cattermole wasn't long +inconvenienced by the jolting.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Who you going to stop with?" he asked +next.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mrs. Ralston and Miss Drew."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Who?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mrs. Ralston and Miss Drew."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Who? I don't hear you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Miss Drew."</p> + +<p class="indent">"The Crews?—There ain't no such +people in town."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Miss Drew!" Jane became slightly +crimson.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll tell you," said Mr. Cattermole, +"we'll wait. I can't hear. Really I can't."</p> + +<p class="indent">The next minute they arrived at Mrs. +Cowmull's, since she lived in the first +house on the street. Lorenzo Rath, the +artist, who had been sitting on the middle +seat with Madeleine, now pressed her +hand, twisted about and shook Jane's, +nodded to old Mr. Cattermole, leaned +forward and dragged his suit-case from +under the seat, and then wriggled out, over +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 8]</span> +two boxes and under a flapping curtain, +and down on to the sidewalk. Mrs. Cowmull +was standing on the porch, trying to +look hospitable and unconscious at the +same time. "Here," said the stage driver, +suddenly delivering Lorenzo's trunk on to +the top of his head,—"and here's the +lampshade and the codfish,—they get +down here, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo couldn't help laughing. "Au +revoir," he cried, waving the lampshade +as the steps began to move.</p> + +<p class="indent">"We'll meet again soon," Madeleine +cried, her face full of bright color.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, of course."</p> + +<p class="indent">Then they were off.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Seemed a nice young feller," said old +Mr. Cattermole to Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes." She tried to speak loudly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Hey!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll tell you," said old Mr. Cattermole +benevolently, "you come and see my granddaughter +Emily, and then we'll talk. My +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 9]</span> +granddaughter's a great student. You'll +like her. She's full of the new ideas and +new books and all that. We're very proud +of her. Only she don't get married."</p> + +<p class="indent">Then the stage stopped, and Mrs. Mead +came running out. "Oh, Father, did you +buy the new magazines,—on the train, +you know?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Old Mr. Cattermole was descending backwards +with the care of a cat in an apple-tree. +"It's my daughter," he said to +Jane. "I can always hear her because +she speaks so plain. Yes, Emma, it <i>was</i> +dusty, very dusty."</p> + +<p class="indent">"This lawn-sprinkler is your's, ain't it?" +said the stage driver, jerking it off the roof +into Mrs. Mead's arms. "Here's his bag, +too."</p> + +<p class="indent">And then they went on again. Madeleine +now had space to turn about. "You'll +come and see me?" she asked Jane earnestly; +"it'll be so nice. We're both +strangers here."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll try," Jane answered, "but I shall +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 10]</span> +be closely tied to the house. Aunt Susan +is an invalid, you see. I'll not only have +all the work, but if I go out, that poor +sick woman will be left helpless and alone +up-stairs."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perhaps I can come and see you, then," +said Madeleine. "I'll have the time to +come, if you'll have the time to see me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't know anything about what my +life will be," said Jane. "As I told you +on the train, I've only seen my aunts once +in my life and that was fifteen years ago. +But I should think that you could come +and see us. I should think that a little +company would do Aunt Susan a lot of +good. I'm sure that it would, in fact. +But she may not like to see strangers. I +really don't know a thing about it. I'm +all in the dark."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll come and ask if I may come," said +Madeleine brightly. "If she sees me, +maybe she'll like me. Most everybody +does." She laughed.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm sure of that," Jane said, laughing, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 11]</span> +too. Then the stage stopped at Miss +Debby Vane's, and Miss Debby came +flying down to embrace her cousin. +"Thanks be to God that you're here safe, +my dear. These awful storms at sea have +just about frightened me to death."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I was on land, Aunt Deborah." +Madeleine, in getting down, had gotten +into a warm embrace at the same time.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know, dear, I know. But one can't +remember that all the time—can one?" +Miss Debby was kissing her over and over.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Your step-ladder. Look out!" cried +the stage driver, and they had barely time +to jump from under.</p> + +<p class="indent">Then Madeleine reached up and clasped +Jane's hand. "We shall be friends," she +said earnestly; "I've never met any one +whom I've liked quite in the same way +that I like you. Do let us see all that we +can of one another."</p> + +<p class="indent">"<i>I</i> want to, I know," Jane answered.</p> + +<p class="indent">The stage driver was already remounting +his seat.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 12]</span> +"Au revoir," Madeleine cried, just as +Lorenzo had done.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Just for a little," Jane called back, +and then she was alone in the stage, rattling +down the long, green-arched street +to its furthest end.</p> + +<p class="indent">"There goes the stage," Katie Croft +called out to her mother-in-law in the +next room. "Now Miss Drew'll have her +niece and be able to get away for a little +rest."</p> + +<p class="indent">"If it was a daughter-in-law, she couldn't, +maybe," said a voice from the next room; +"the rest is going to be poor, sweet Susan +Ralston's, anyhow. Oh, my Susan Ralston, +my dear, sweet Susan Ralston, my +loving Susan Ralston, where I used to go +and call!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, Mother, you haven't so much as +thought of Mrs. Ralston for years." Katie's +voice was very sharp.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Nobody knows what I think of," wailed +the voice from the other room. "My +thoughts is music. They fly and sing all +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 13]</span> +night. They sing Caw, Caw, and they +fly like feathers."</p> + +<p class="indent">Katie Croft walked over and shut the +door with a bang. Katie was almost +beside herself.</p> + +<p class="indent">The stage now drew up before the Ralston +house.</p> + +<p class="indent">Miss Matilda quitted the window, where +she had stood watching for an hour, and +went to the gate. Her emotions were +quite tumultuous—for her. Single-handed +she had tended her sister for five years, +and now she was going to have a rest. +She had had very trying symptoms, and +the doctor had advised a rest,—three +weeks of freedom, night and day. She was +going away on a real holiday, going back +to the place where she had taught school +before the summons had come to cherish, +love, and protect her only sister, who was +not strong and had property. It seemed +like a dream,—a wild, lively, and joyful +dream. She almost smiled as she thought +of what was at hand.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 14]</span> +Jane descended, her small trunk came +bang down beside her in the same instant, +and the driver was paid and drove off. +The aunt and niece then turned to go into +the house.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, and so it's you!" Matilda's +tone and glance were slightly inquisitorial, +and more than slightly dictatorial. "I'm +glad to see you're strong. You'll need be. +She's an awful care. She ain't up much +now. Isn't up at all sometimes for weeks. +Sleeps considerable. Take off your hat +and coat and hang them there. That's +the place where they belong."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane obeyed without saying anything. +But her smile spoke for her.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Hungry?" inquired Matilda.</p> + +<p class="indent">"A little."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I surmised you would be and waited +supper. Thought you'd see how I fixed +hers then. She's eating very little. Less +and less all the time. There's a garden to +weed, too. Awful inconvenient out there +across two stiles. But she won't give it +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 15]</span> +up. She pays me to tend it, or I'd let the +dandelions root it out in short order. But +I tend it."</p> + +<p class="indent">They had gone into the kitchen, where +a kettle stewed feebly over a half-dead +fire. "Sit down," said Matilda. "I'll fix +her supper first. She takes her tea cold, +so I save it from morning and heat it up +with a little boiling water, <i>so</i>. Then there's +this bit of fish I saved from day before +yesterday, and I cut a piece of bread. No +butter, because her stomach's delicate. +You'll see that she'll hardly eat this. +Watch now."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane sat and watched, still smiling.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mr. Rath, the artist, came down in the +stage with you, didn't he?" Miss Matilda +went on. "What kind of a young man +was he? Somebody'll tell you, so it might +as well be me, what's brought him here. +Mrs. Cowmull's trying to marry off her +niece, Emily Mead. There aren't any men +in town, so she advertised. She gave it out +that she wanted a boarder, but everybody +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 16]</span> +see through that. That's what marriage +has come to these days, catching men to +board 'em and then marrying them when +they're thinking of something else. I thank +Heaven I ain't had nothing to do with any +marriage. They're a bad business. There, +that's your supper."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane started slightly. Her own cold +fish and lukewarm tea sat before her. +"Shan't I take Aunt Susan's up first?" +she asked, recollecting that she still had +some lunch in her bag, and that Matilda +would be leaving early in the morning.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No need. She likes things cold. You +ought to see her face if she gets anything +boiling in her mouth. It's no use to give +her nothing hot. You'd think it was a +snake. I give it up the third time she +burnt her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I ought to go up and see her, I +think; she hasn't seen me since I was such +a little girl."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No need. You go ahead and enjoy +your supper without bothering over her. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 17]</span> +She knows you're here, and she isn't one +that's interested in things. She'll read +an old shelf paper for hours, but carry +her up a new paper and like as not when +you get to the bed with it, you'll find her +asleep. She sleeps a lot."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane—thus urged—picked the chilled +fish with a fork and considered.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll show you about the house after +you've done eating," the aunt continued +presently; "it's easy taken care of, for I +keep it all shut up. Just Susan's room +and mine and the kitchen is open. The +neighbors won't bother you, for I give them +to understand long ago as I wasn't one with +time to waste. There isn't any one in the +place that a woman with any sense would +want to bother with, anyhow."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't fancy that I'll have time to be +lonesome," smiled Jane, bravely swallowing +some tea.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You'd have if it wasn't for the garden. +I don't know whatever in the world makes +Susan set such store by that garden. She +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 18]</span> +will have it that it shall be kept up in memory +of her husband, and you never saw such +weeds. I've often sat down backwards +when one come up—often."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't see it at all," with a glance out +of the window.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You can't from here. And it's got to be +watered, and she counts every pot full of +water from her bed. She can hear me pumping. +The birds dig up the seeds as fast as I +can plant 'em, and I never saw no sense in +slaving in the sun over what you can buy +in the shade any day.—Are you done?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I'm done."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Then come on."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Can I spread the tray?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Tray! She doesn't have a tray. What +should I fuss with a tray for, when I've +got two hands?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane rose and stood by the table in silence, +watching the cup filled from the standing +teapot and the plate ornamented with a +lonely bit of fish and a slice of bread. +"Don't you butter the bread?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 19]</span> +"She's in bed so much she mustn't +have rich food," Matilda answered; "there, +now it's ready. Come on."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Shan't I carry anything?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can take it, I guess. I've carried it +alone for five years; I guess I can manage +it to-night."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane followed up the stairs in silence; +Matilda marched ahead with a firm, heavy +tread.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Shall I knock for you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't know what for. She yells +anyway, whenever I come in, whether she's +knocked or not. Just open the door."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane opened the door gently, and they +went in together. The room was half +darkened, and only a little sharp nose +showed over the top of the bedquilt.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Here's your supper," said the affectionate +sister, "and here's Jane."</p> + +<p class="indent">A shrill cry was followed by two eyes +tipping upward beyond the nose. "Oh, +are you Jane?" There was a lot of pathos +in the tone.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 20]</span> +The girl moved quickly to the bedside. +"I hope that we're going to be very happy," +she said; "we must love one another very +much, you know."</p> + +<p class="indent">The invalid hoisted herself on to an elbow +and looked towards the plate which Matilda +was holding forth.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, my! Fish again!" she wailed.</p> + +<p class="indent">Later—on their way back to the kitchen +fire—Matilda said significantly: "Most +ungrateful person I ever saw, she is. But +just don't notice what she says. It's the +only way to get on. I keep her room tidy +and I keep her house clean and I keep +her garden weeded. I'm careful of her +money, and she's well fed. I don't know +what more any one could ask, but she +ain't satisfied and she ain't always polite, +but you'll only have three weeks of what +I've had for five years, so I guess it won't +kill you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I think that I'll be all right," Jane +answered cheerfully.</p> + +<p class="indent">"The stage is ordered for seven in the +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 21]</span> +morning, and I shall get up at half-past +four," the aunt continued. "You can +sleep till five just as well. I'm going to +bed now, and you'd better do the same +thing."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I think so," said Jane cheerfully; +"good night."</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 22]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="III" id="III"></a>CHAPTER III</h2> + +<p class="h2a">MATILDA TEACHES</p> + +<p class="indent">MATILDA seated herself bolt upright +on one of the kitchen chairs and +drew a hard, stiff sigh.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It'll be a great rest to get away," she +said, "more of a rest than any one but me +will ever know. You see, she's left all +she's got to me in her will, so I'm bound in +honor to keep a pretty sharp watch over +everything. I can't even take a chance +at her sinking suddenly away, with the +room not picked up or a cobweb in some +high corner. I've seen her will, and she +ain't left you a cent, so you won't have the +same responsibility. It'll be easier for +you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll do my very best," said Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"The trouble is I'm too conscientious," +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 23]</span> +said Matilda. "I was always conscientious, +and she was always slack. It's an +awful failing. It's a warning, too, for now +there she lays, snug as a bug in a rug, and +me with New Asthma in my arm from tending +her and the house."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You'll get over all that very soon," said +the niece soothingly.</p> + +<p class="indent">Matilda glanced at her suspiciously. +"No, I shan't. I may get better, but I +shan't get over it. It's a nerve trouble +and can't never be completely cured. A +doctor can alligator it, but he can't cure +it. I'll have it till I die."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was silent.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You wrote that you were some kind of +a nurse. What kind did you say you +were?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm a Sunshine Nurse."</p> + +<p class="indent">"A Sunshine Nurse! What's that? +Some new idea of never pulling down the +shades?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed. "Not exactly. It's an +Order just founded by a doctor. He picked +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 24]</span> +out the girls himself, and he sends them +where he chooses for training."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What's the training?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked at her and hesitated a little. +"I expect you'll laugh," she said finally; +"it does sound funny to any one who isn't +used to such ideas. We're to see the sun +as always shining, and always shine ourselves, +and our training consists in going +where there isn't any brightness and being +bright, and going where there isn't any +happiness and teaching happiness."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Sounds to me like nonsense," said +Matilda, rising abruptly; "don't you go +letting up the sitting-room shades and +fading the upholstering,—that's all I've +got to say. Come now and I'll show you +about locking up, and then we'll go to +bed."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane obeyed with promptness and was +most observant and attentive. Matilda +loaded her with behests and instructions +and seemed appreciative of the intelligence +with which they were received.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 25]</span> +"I wouldn't go in for nothing fancy," +she said, as they completed their task; +"the less you stir up her and the house, the +easier it'll be for me when I come back. +You don't want to ever forget that I'm +coming back, and don't put any fancy ideas +into her head. There's plenty to do here +without going out of your way to upset +my ways."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll remember," said Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">Then they started up-stairs, and a few +minutes later the Sunshine Nurse was +alone in her own room, free to stand quietly +by the window and let her outward gaze +form a bond between the still beauty of +a country night and the glad vision of +work in plenty, and that of a kind which +Miss Matilda couldn't prohibit, because +she knew not the world in which such work +is done.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Not—" said Jane to herself with a +little whimsical smile—"not but what +I'm 'most sure that my teaching will be +manifest in a lot of material changes, too, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 26]</span> +but by the time that she comes back, her +own feelings will be sufficiently 'alligatored' +so that she'll see life differently +also. God's plan is just as much for her +good in sending her away as it is for mine +in sending me here, and I mustn't forget +that for a minute. I'll be busy and she'll +be busy, and we'll both be learning and +we'll both be teaching and we'll both be +being necessary."</p> + +<p class="indent">She drew a chair close and sat down, full +of her own bright and helpful thoughts. +Much of love and wonder came flooding +into her through the medium of the sweet, +calm night without. "It's like being among +angels," she fancied, and felt a close companionship +with those who had known the +Great White Messengers face to face.</p> + +<p class="indent">Long she sat there, praying the prayer +that is just one indrawn breath of content +and uplifted consciousness. Not many girls +of twenty-two would have seen so much +in that not unusual situation, and yet it +was to her so brimful of fair possibilities +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 27]</span> +that she could hardly wait for morning to +begin work.</p> + +<p class="indent">When she rose to undress, when she +climbed into the plain, hard bed that received +her so kindly, when she slept at +last, all was with the same sense of responsibility +mixed with energetic intention. All +that she had "asked" in the usual sense of +"asking in prayer" had been "to be +shown exactly how," and because she was +one of those who know every prayer to be +answered, in the hour of its making she +knew that to be answered, too. "I'll be +led along," was her last thought before +sleeping, and it swept the fringe of her consciousness, +leaving her to enter dreamland +with the happy security of a trusting child.</p> + +<p class="indent">It really seemed no time at all before +Matilda rapped loudly on her door, bringing +her suddenly to the knowledge that +the hour to begin all the longed-for work +was at hand.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Five o'clock!" Matilda howled gently +through the crack.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 28]</span> +"Yes, yes," she cried in response.</p> + +<p class="indent">The door opened a bit wider. "You'd +better get right up or you'll go to sleep +again," Matilda said, putting her head in, +"right this minute."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I will."</p> + +<p class="indent">She sat up in bed to prove it.</p> + +<p class="indent">"All right," said her aunt—and shut +the door.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane had unpacked her small trunk the +night before, and so was able to dress +quickly and get down-stairs without a +minute wasted. She found Matilda in +the kitchen, very busy with the stove.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I do hope you'll remember what I said +last night," she said, shoveling out ashes +with an energy that filled the room with +dust. "I can't have her habits all upset. +It'll be no good giving me this change if +you go and spoil her. Remember that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I won't make any trouble," promised +Jane. "I'll always remember that you're +coming back."</p> + +<p class="indent">As she spoke, she saw again the thin, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 29]</span> +hopeless face on the pillow up-stairs and +knew that Matilda herself was to know a +glad surprise over the change which should +welcome her home-coming. It was the +learning to instantly realize the better +side of those who insisted on exhibiting +their worst that was the leading force in +the training of that beaming little Order +to which she belonged. The Sunshine +Nurses were forbidden to consider anything +or anybody as fixedly wrong either in kind, +conception, or working out. It would be +a very comfortable way of looking at things—even +for such mere, ordinary, everyday +folk as you and me.</p> + +<p class="indent">Matilda now said, "Ugh, ugh!" over +the dust and proceeded to dive into the +wood-box with one hand and get a sliver +in her thumb.</p> + +<p class="indent">"In the morning she has tea," she said, +going to the window to put her hand to +rights. "One cup. Piece of bread. At +noon, whatever is handy. Night, cup of +tea and whatever she fancies. Bread or a +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 30]</span> +cracker usually. She eats very little and +less all the time. The cat eats more than +she does. He's a snooper, that cat,—you'll +have to watch out."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane didn't seem to understand. "A—a +snooper?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Steals food. Awful thief. Slap him +when you catch him at it; it's all you can +do. Sometimes I throw water over him. +He'll make off with what would be a meal +for a hired man, and he's sly as any other +thief."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Can't I help you with your hand?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, you can't. I get lots of them. +They bother me a little because Mrs. +Croft's cousin died of blood-poison from +one. There, it's out. What was I saying? +Oh, yes, the cat."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Where is she now?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's a he. Named Alfred for her husband. +He's up in her room now. Always +sleeps on her bed. She will have him, and +I humor her. She's my only sister and +she can't live long and she's left me all her +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 31]</span> +money, and I humor her. It's my plain +duty."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Is it healthy for an invalid to sleep with +a cat?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, it ain't. But I promised to do +whatever she said about the cat and the +garden, and I do."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm sure it's very good in you," Jane +murmured, looking out of the window.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It is. I'm a good woman. I do my +whole duty, and there's not many in a town +this size can say as much."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Where is the garden?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll show you, if you don't mind getting +your feet wet. I have my rubbers on +already, to travel, so I can go right there +now while the fire is kindling."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Is it wet?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Most grass is wet, at five in the morning."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane wanted to laugh. "I mean, isn't +there a path?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Part way, and then you have to climb +two fences."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 32]</span> +"Climb! Two!" the niece turned in +surprise.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Climb two fences. You never saw +such a place. The strip between is rented +for a cow-pasture. That's why there's +two fences."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But why not have gates?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't ask me. Find out if you can. +I've lived here five years, and I ain't found +out. You try and see if you'll do better. +She's very secretive, and so was he before +he died. I've just had to get along the +best I could. She fails and fails steady, +but it don't seem to affect her health none, +and now at last it's affected mine instead +and give me neophytes in my left arm."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane turned her head and looked some +more out of the window.</p> + +<p class="indent">"We'll go now. Might as well. The +kettle will get to boiling while we're away, +and then we'll have breakfast. It boils +slow, because I've got the eggs in it for +my lunch. Come on."</p> + +<p class="indent">The question of the wet grass seemed to +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 33]</span> +have faded. They went out the kitchen +door. It was a clear, bright morning. +"Weedy weather," commented Matilda, +and led the way down the path.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's a pretty place," said Jane, her eyes +roaming happily.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I suppose so. But it takes an +artist or some one who hasn't lived in it +for five years to feel that way." She +paused to climb the first fence. It was +three rails high and very awkward. "I'll +go over first," she said. "Think of it; +I've done this six times a day for five +years."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane didn't wonder that she was so agile +at it. "But how funny to have a garden +away off here!" she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">Matilda was now over on the other side. +"Yes, and think of keeping it up. Folks +about here make no bones of telling me +that they were both half-witted, only as +she's my sister, they try to give me to +understand as she caught it from him. +He was a miser, you know."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 34]</span> +Jane was just getting her second leg +over. "I don't know a thing about him," +she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, you will, soon enough. The +neighbors'll come flocking as soon as I'm +gone, and you'll soon know all there is to +know about us all. They'll pick me to +pieces, too, and tell you I'm starving Susan +to death, but I don't care. Climbing these +fences has hardened me to calumny."</p> + +<p class="indent">They crossed the strip of cow-pasture, +and Matilda got over another fence, saying +as she did so: "Whom the Lord loveth +He chasteneth," leaving Jane to make +the application and follow her at the same +time.</p> + +<p class="indent">Then they found themselves in a trim +little garden.</p> + +<p class="indent">"How sweet," said the niece.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You can see I've done my duty by it, +too," said Matilda; "that's my way. +I'm hard and I ain't pretty to look at, but +I do my duty, which is more'n most handsome +women do. Every last bean here is +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 35]</span> +clawed around like it ought to be, and the +whole thing neat as wax. Same with +Susan; you'd think from her face I'd +murdered her, and yet the Recording Angel +knows she's had a cold sponge and every +last snarl combed out of her hair every +day since I came. I don't boast, but I do +work."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear me, it's a long way from the +house," said Jane, forgetting her higher +philosophy for the minute.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's a good ten minutes to get here. +A picking of peas is a half-hour's job. And +ten to one, when I get back, the cat's been +at the cream."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane had had time to remember. "I +can see you've been awfully good," she +said warmly, "and my, but you've worked +hard. Everything shows that."</p> + +<p class="indent">Matilda's face flushed with pleasure, +the sudden pathetic flushing of unexpected +appreciation. "I just have," she declared. +"I've worked hard all my life and done a +lot of good, and nobody's ever bothered +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 36]</span> +to thank me. She don't. She just lays +there and lets me run up and down stairs +and climb fences and dig weeds and scamper +back and forth with a extra hike, when I +hear the bell of the door, till it'll be a mercy +if I don't get neophytes all over, and the +New Asthma in both legs, <i>I</i> think."</p> + +<p class="indent">After a brief tour of the tiny whole, +devoted mainly to instructing the novice, +Matilda led the way back to the house.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Does it ever need watering?" Jane +asked, lapsing again to a lower level.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Sometimes," said Matilda briefly. Jane +hadn't the heart to say another word until—several +steps further on—it occurred +to her that the garden also could be only +a good factor in God's plan, if she wreathed +it and shrined it and saw it in her world, +as He saw all His world on the day when it +was first manifest and set. "And God +saw everything that He had made, and +behold, it was very good."</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 37]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="IV" id="IV"></a>CHAPTER IV</h2> + +<p class="h2a">JANE BEGINS SUNSHINING</p> + +<p class="indent">THE stage came for Matilda at eight +o'clock. For half an hour before it +could possibly be due, the traveler sat +ready on a chair in the hall, with her umbrella +tightly gripped in both hands, delivering +bits of useful information as they +occurred to her.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Be careful to lock up well every night."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Remember if she dies sudden, I shall +want to know at once."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't look to enjoy yourself, but remember +you're doin' a act of Christian +charity."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane sat on a small, hard ottoman in +the corner by the whatnot and said: "I'll +try," or "Yes, indeed," every time.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You're a good girl," the aunt said +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 38]</span> +finally. "I'm glad to know you. Those +Rainy-day Cooks or whatever you call +yourself—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Sunshine Nurse."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, of course,—well, it's a good idea. +I feel perfectly sure you'll do everything +you know how."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I will," said Jane, resolving all +over fresh that everything was going to +come out fine, even to the return of Matilda +herself.</p> + +<p class="indent">"There, I hear the stage on the bridge," +said her aunt, jumping to her feet suddenly. +"I must go and say good-by to Susan."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Isn't she still asleep?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It doesn't matter. She's my only living +sister, and it's my duty to wake her up."</p> + +<p class="indent">She rushed up-stairs, and a feeble little +yell from above soon announced her duty +done. Then followed a brief hum and +jabber, and then she came running down +again.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Feels bad to see me go," she said briefly. +"That's natural, as she's turned over to +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 39]</span> +you body and soul and ain't the least idea +what you're like. I told her it was no more +chances than every child run just being +born, and a third of them lived, but she +never could see reason,—kind of clung +to my arm,—she's my only sister, and it +makes me feel bad." With which hasty +statement Matilda gave a brief dab to +each eye, put up her pocket-handkerchief, +and opened the front door. Jane had her +bag in her hand, and they had carried the +trunk to the gate before.</p> + +<p class="indent">The stage was empty, and the driver was +tying the trunk-strap with a rope.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, good-by," said Matilda; "remember +to lock up well every night."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I will," said Jane. "I hope you'll +have a good time and a splendid change."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm sure of the change," said Matilda, +swinging herself up with an agility bred of +her liberal diet on stiles. "Five years,—will +you only think of it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">The driver picked up the reins, gave them +a slap, and the expedition was off.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 40]</span> +Matilda Drew was really "gone off on a +visit."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Think of it," said Katie Croft, who, +despite her town-name of "Katie," was a +gray-haired woman of fifty. "Think of +it! A vacation! What luck some folks +have. I shall never have a vacation in +all—" her voice ceased, and she continued +sweeping down the steps, the stage passing +out of sight as she did so.</p> + +<p class="indent">Meanwhile Jane had re-entered the house +and carefully closed the door after her. +She felt curiously freed in spirit, and that +subtly supreme joy of seeing a helplessly +bad situation delivered bound and gagged +into one's hands to be mended was hers.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll go straight and ask about auntie's +breakfast first," she thought, mounting +the staircase. To her light tap at the +door, a feeble "come in" responded. She +entered then and observed, with a slight +start, that the invalid had just been up. +The blind was drawn, and a pair of kicked-off +slippers betrayed a hasty jump back +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 41]</span> +into bed. Her eyes sought Susan's in +explanation. "I didn't know that you +could move about," she said, with a pleased +look.</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's little, sharp nose had an apologetic +appearance, as it showed over the +sheet-fold. "I can get about a little, days +when I'm strong," she explained, "and I +wanted to see her off. I wanted to see if +she really did go." She paused, gave a +sharp choke and gasp, and then waited.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane leaned over and kissed her forehead. +"I will try very hard to make you comfortable +and happy," she said gently.</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan rather shrunk together in the bed. +"What kind of a girl are you, anyhow?" +she asked suddenly and sharply. "Are +you really religious, or do you only just go +to church?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I try to do what's right," her niece +answered simply.</p> + +<p class="indent">The invalid contemplated her intently. +"It can be pretty hard living with any +one that tries to do right," she said. "My +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 42]</span> +experience is that good people is often +more trying than bad ones. Maybe it's +just that I've had more to do with them, +though. I suppose Matilda told you about +everything and the garden and all?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I think I know what to see to."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And the cat?—and his stealing?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, she told me about him."</p> + +<p class="indent">"The garden must be weeded," Susan +pronounced, sinking down deep into the +bed. "Don't you ever forget that. And +that cat has got to be fed—and well fed, +too—even if he does steal."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane watched her disappear beneath the +bedclothes.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Auntie," she said, "I've got lots of +funny ideas, and one of them is that it's +wicked not to be just as happy as possible +every minute. Now I'm to be here three +weeks, and I think that I ought to be able +to make them a real change for you as well +as for Aunt Matilda. We'll begin with +your breakfast. You tell me what you +like best, and I'll fix it for you—"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 43]</span> +Susan's head came up out of the bed-clothes +with the suddenness of a boy rising +from a dive. "If I can have anything I +want," she cried, "I want some hot tea—some +boiling hot tea, some tea made with +water that's boiling as hard as it can boil. +And I want the pot hot. Burning hot +before the tea goes in."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane started. "I thought you liked your +tea cold."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's eyes fairly snapped. "Well, I +don't. I don't like nothing cold. I like +everything hot."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane moved towards the door. "I'll +go and make some right away," she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's small, bright eyes looked after +her very hard indeed. "I wonder if you +really mean what you say about my doing +what I please."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course I mean what I say."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Then I want to go back into my own +room."</p> + +<p class="indent">The niece stopped. "Isn't this your +room?" she asked in surprise.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 44]</span> +"No, this is the nearest room to the top +of the stairs. I'll show you which is my +room." With a quick leap she was out +of bed.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Barefooted!" cried Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll get into slippers quick enough, and +I always wear stockings in bed. It's one +of my peculiar ways. I'm very peculiar." +She was running out of the room. Jane +followed, astonished at the strength and +steadiness of the bedridden.</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I thought that—that you were +always in bed," she stammered.</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan stopped short and turned about. +"It was the pleasantest way to get along," +she said briefly. "I guess that you've a +really kind heart, so I'll trust you and tell +you the truth. Matilda wasn't here very +long before I see that if her patience wasn't +to give out, I'd got to begin to fail. I went +to bed, and I've failed ever since. I've +failed steady. It's been the only thing +to do. It wasn't easy, but it was that or +have things a lot harder. So I failed."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 45]</span> +Jane stared in amazement, and then +suddenly the fun of it all overcame her, +and she burst out laughing. Susan laughed, +too. "It was all I could do," she repeated +over and over.</p> + +<p class="indent">"And so you failed," said her niece, still +laughing.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, and so I failed."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mercy on us, it's the funniest thing I +ever heard in all my life," exclaimed the +Sunshine Nurse.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It ain't always been funny for me," +said Susan, "but come, now, I want to +show you my room."</p> + +<p class="indent">She opened a door as she spoke and led +the way into a dark, musty-smelling place. +It was the work of only a minute to draw +the blind and throw up the window. +"Right after we've had breakfast, we'll +clean it," the aunt declared, "and then +I'll move right back in. Husband and me +had this room for twenty long years together. +He was a saving man, and most +of what he was intending to save when I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 46]</span> +wanted to buy things was told me in this +room. Whatever I wanted he always said +I could have, and then when it came night, +he said I couldn't. The room is full of +memories for me—sad memories—but +after he was mercifully snatched to everlasting +blessedness, I grew fond of it. It's +a nice room."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think I'll get your tea," said Jane, +"and then I'll clean this room and help +you move into it. We'll have you all +settled before noon."</p> + +<p class="indent">She turned and ran down to the kitchen. +The kettle was singing, and she stuffed +more wood in under it and began to hunt +for a tray and the other concomitants of +an up-stairs breakfast. Things were not +easily found.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, I declare!" a voice at the window +behind her exclaimed, as she was down on +her knees getting a tray-cloth out of a +lower drawer. The voice gave her a violent +start, being a man's. She sprang to +her feet and faced about.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 47]</span> +"I'm sorry; I thought you'd know me." +It was the artist of the day before, the +young man who had come down in the +stage.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's so early." She went to the window +and shook hands. "But I'm glad to see +you, anyhow."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I always get up at six and walk five +miles before breakfast when I'm in the +country," he explained.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you really? What enterprise!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"And so this is where you've come. +Why, it's the quaintest old place that I +ever saw. A regular tangle of picturesque +possibilities. Who are you visiting?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm taking care of my invalid aunt +while my other aunt has a little rest."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Is she very ill?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, no. But this is her tea that I'm +making, and I must take it up to her now."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll go, then. But may I come again—and +sketch?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't have company. I'll be too +busy."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 48]</span> +"Can't I help with the work?"</p> + +<p class="indent">He was so pleasant and jolly that she +couldn't help laughing. "I'm afraid not," +she said, shaking her head.</p> + +<p class="indent">He stood with his hand on the window-sash. +"Do you know my name?" he +asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's Lorenzo, Lorenzo Rath. I've to +grow famous with that name. Think of +it."</p> + +<p class="indent">She laughed again.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can draw the outside of the house, +anyhow—can't I?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear me, I suppose so,"—she picked +up the tray,—"you must go now, though. +Good-by."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Good-by," he cried after her.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, see the steam," was Susan's exultant +exclamation, as she entered her room. +"I ain't seen steam coming out of a teapot's +nose for upwards of three years. +Matilda just couldn't seem to stand my +taking my tea hot, and she's my only sister, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 49]</span> +and I humor her. Who was you talking +to?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"A man who came down on the stage +yesterday. He was out walking and didn't +know that I lived here."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, a love affair!" cried Susan, in +high-keyed ecstasy. "He's fallen in love +with you, and like enough was prowling +around all night. Oh! How interesting! +I ain't seen a love affair close to for +years." She was so genuinely joyful that +Jane felt sorry to dampen the enthusiasm.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't believe you'll see one now," +she said, smiling good-humoredly. "You +see, I don't mean to marry, Auntie. I'm a +Sunshine Nurse, and they have their hands +too full for that kind of thing."</p> + +<p class="indent">"A nurse! I didn't know you were a +nurse."</p> + +<p class="indent">"A Sunshine Nurse is a person who does +what doctors can't always do,—who makes +folk well."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Are you going to make me well?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," said Jane, resolutely.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 50]</span> +Susan stopped eating and looked at her +with an expression full of contradictory +feelings. "I shall like it," she said slowly. +"But, oh my! Matilda won't. Why, she—" +she paused. "Oh, I <i>do</i> wonder if I +can trust you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Anybody can trust me," said Jane. +"It's part of my training to be honest."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear me, but that's a good idea," +said Susan, with sincerest approval. "Well, +if I can trust you, I don't mind telling +you that it's taken considerable care for +me to live along with Matilda. I don't +mean anything against her—not rat-poison +nor anything like that, you know?—but +she hasn't just approved of my living; she's +looked upon it as a waste of her time. +And I've had to manage pretty careful +in consequence. You see, she's my only +sister, and she'd have my property anyhow, +but if I had to have a nurse or a woman to +look out for me long, there'd be no property +to leave. She's real sensible, and we +both know just how it is, but it's been +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 51]</span> +pleasantest for me to stay more and more +in bed and kind of catch at things as I walk, +and once in a while I don't eat all day, and +so it keeps up her hope and keeps things +pleasant."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked paralyzed. "How can you +go without food all day?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan considered a little. Then she +took a big drink of hot tea and confessed. +"I don't really. I watch till she goes +to the garden, and then I skip down-stairs +and make a good meal and lay it all on +the cat."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane sank down on the foot of the bed +and burst out laughing again. Again she +just couldn't help it. Susan laughed, too; +first softly and gingerly, then in a way +almost as hearty as her niece's.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh me, oh my," the latter declared, +after a minute, wiping her eyes. "Well, +we'll have a very lively three weeks, I +see."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, yes," Susan exclaimed, "and we'll +have liver and bacon, and I'll see the +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 52]</span> +neighbors when they come in. I give up +seeing them because it made so much +trouble, and the way I'm made is—'Anything +for peace.' That's what I always +used to say to husband, whatever he said. +First along I used to say real things, but +all the last years I just said whatever he +said; anything for peace."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You've finished your tea now," said +Jane, rising. "I'll take the tray down while +you dress a bit, and then we'll move you +into the other room."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, and <i>how</i> I will enjoy it," cried +Susan, clasping her hands in ecstasy. "Oh, +you Sunshine Jane, you—how glad I am +you've come."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm glad, too," said Jane. "We'll have +an awfully nice time."</p> + +<p class="indent">She ran down-stairs with the tray and +found Madeleine sitting in the kitchen, +waiting. "Why, how long have you been +here?" she asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine lifted a rather mournful countenance +and tried to smile. "Oh, Miss +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 53]</span> +Grey. I'm so blue. I can't stand this +place at all, I don't believe. My situation +is going to be unbearable."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What's the matter with it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's so small and petty and spiteful. +All last evening I had to sit and listen to +gossip. I hate personalities. Why, whatever +I do is going to be seen and talked +about the minute I do it."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked grave. "That nice woman +who came out to meet you didn't look like +a gossip."</p> + +<p class="indent">"She isn't, but she sits and listens, and +every once in a while she throws oil on +the fire by saying, '<i>I</i> never believed the +story.'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Who did the talking?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"The neighbors—a woman named Mrs. +Mead, who came in with her daughter. +The mother was old-fashioned in her ideas, +and the daughter was new. That old +man in the stage stopped there, you +know."</p> + +<p class="indent">"My aunt spoke of them last evening," +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 54]</span> +said Jane; "she said that Emily Mead +was picked out to marry that young man +who came down with us."</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine laughed and then blushed. +"I'm afraid not," she said. "I know him. +He won't marry anybody here."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane turned and began to put away the +breakfast things.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't be bored," she said gently. "Put +on this extra apron, and help me wash +these dishes; and then I'll set the kitchen +to rights and get ready to move my aunt +into another bedroom. She's an invalid, +you know."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What kind of a person is your aunt?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Awfully nice," began Jane, but was +stopped by the sudden opening of the hall +door.</p> + +<p class="indent">There stood Susan, all dressed.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It seems good to have clothes on again," +she remarked calmly; "I ain't been dressed +for upwards of three years."</p> + +<p class="indent">Then she saw Madeleine. "How do +you do," she said, holding out her hand. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 55]</span> +"I suppose you're the Miss Mar from +Deborah's?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I am," Madeleine admitted, smiling.</p> + +<p class="indent">"My, but you look good to me," said +Susan; "it's so nice to see a strange face. +You see, I've been in bed for a long time, +and I give up seeing strangers long before +that." She sat down on one of the +kitchen chairs and beamed on them both, +turn and turn about. "Husband always +thought that strangers was pickpockets," +she said, "but I like to look at 'em. My, +but I will enjoy these next weeks. You +see, I live with my sister," she explained to +Madeleine, "and I've had a pretty hard +time. My sister's got a good heart, but +maybe you know how awful hard it is to +live with that kind of people. It's been +pleasanter to stay in bed."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you won't do that any more, +Auntie," said Jane, moving busily about.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, indeed I won't. You see," again +to Madeleine, "she was my only sister, so +I humored her. It's the only way to get +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 56]</span> +on with some people. But you can even +humor folks too much, and she got a disease +they call the Euphrates all up and down +her ear and her elbow, just from being +humored too much. So she's gone off for +a change."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What are you doing?" Madeleine asked +Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Making waffles. I thought it would +be fun to eat them hot right now."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan fairly shrieked with joy. "I ain't +so much as smelt one since husband died. +Waffles in the morning, and I'm so awful +hungry, too. Oh, Jane, the Lord will +surely set a crown of glory on your head +the minute He sees it. Your feet won't +be into heaven when the crown goes on. +How did you ever think of it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane brought out the iron, laughing as +she did so. "Why, Auntie, it's part of +my training."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Cooking waffles in the morning?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No. Giving joy. If I think of any +way to give pleasure and don't do it, I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 57]</span> +count it a sin. To make more happiness is +all the work of a Sunshine Nurse."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Isn't that splendid?" Susan appealed to +Madeleine.</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine's great, beautiful eyes were +lifted towards the other girl's face with an +expression mysterious in its longing. +"Teach me the gift," she said; "I want to +make more happiness, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"We'll be her class," exclaimed Susan, +"just you and me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"The first lesson is eating waffles," Jane +announced solemnly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"And me, too," cried a voice in the +kitchen window, and there was Lorenzo +Rath back for his second call that day, and +it not yet ten o'clock. "I've been to Mrs. +Cowmull's and eaten breakfast, and I'm as +hungry as a wolf." He came in through +the window as he spoke.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, a young man!" cried Susan. "I +ain't seen a young man since the last time +the pump broke. Oh, my! Ain't this +jolly? Ain't this fun?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 58]</span> +"You show Madeleine where to find +plates and forks and knives, Auntie," +said Jane. "Here, Mr. Rath, I'll break +two more eggs and you can beat them. I +haven't made enough batter, if there's a +man to eat, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I feel as if I'd leave Mrs. Cowmull's +to-morrow and come here to board," said +Lorenzo. "Could I?" His tone was very +earnest.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, you couldn't," said Jane firmly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, let him," exclaimed Susan, from the +pantry, where she was getting out plates. +"It'll make Mrs. Cowmull so mad, and I +ain't made any one mad for years and years. +I'd so revel to be human again. And it +would be so nice having a man about, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I couldn't think of it," said Jane, getting +very crimson.</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine looked at the artist.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Then I shall leave Mrs. Cowmull's, +anyway," said Lorenzo, decidedly; "I shall +look up another place at once. Why, that +woman would drive me mad. She says +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 59]</span> +something ridiculous every time she opens +her mouth. She asked me this morning +if I'd ever climbed to the top of the +Kreutzer Sonata."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What did you say?" Madeleine asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I told her no, but I'd been to the bottom +of the Campanile and seen them getting +out coal from the mine there."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, that showed you'd seen some +sights, anyhow," said Susan, placidly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"The waffles are done!" Jane announced. +They all drew up round the table.</p> + +<p class="indent">"This is living," the invalid exclaimed. +"If my sister would only never come back!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Maybe she won't!" suggested Lorenzo.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wouldn't like her to die," said Susan, +gravely. "I'm sensitive over feeling people +better off dead. But if she'd marry, it would +be nice."</p> + +<p class="indent">"For the man?" queried Lorenzo.</p> + +<p class="indent">"For us all," said Susan, gravely.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Just exactly the right thing is going to +happen to her and everybody," said Jane, +firmly—dividing the waffles as she spoke.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 60]</span> +"Are you so sure?" the artist asked, +looking a little amused.</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan noticed the look. "She's a Sunshine +Nurse," she explained quickly. "It's +her religion to be like that. She can't +help it. She's promised."</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 61]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="V" id="V"></a>CHAPTER V</h2> + +<p class="h2a">A CHANGE IN THE FEEL OF THINGS</p> + +<p class="indent">IT didn't take long for the town to wake up +to the fact that some new element had +entered into its composition.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't get over it, Susan Ralston's +being up and about," Miss Debby Vane +said distressedly to Mrs. Mead. "Why, +she was 'most dead!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Matilda ought not to have gone away," +Mrs. Mead said sternly. "Sick folks in +bed can't bear a change. A new face +gives them a little spurt of strength, and +then when they see the old face again, they +kind of give up hope and drop right off."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I know that," said Miss Debby; +"my father had a cousin die that way. +There was a doctor going about in a wagon, +pulling teeth and giving shocks, and he said +he'd give Cousin Hannah a shock and cure +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 62]</span> +her. So they took him up-stairs, and there +she was dead of heart disease. They +thought of prosecuting him, but the funeral +coming right on they hadn't time, and +then he was gone to another place, and it +seemed too much bother."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That girl is just the same kind, I believe," +said Mrs. Mead; "that dreadful +way of making you feel that after all what +she says is pretty sensible, maybe. My +Emily is awfully took with her, and Father's +just crazy about her. He come down on +the stage with her, and then he went out to +see her. She knows how to get around men; +she was frying doughnuts."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, and Mrs. Cowmull's artist was +out there, and they had waffles in the middle +of the morning. That's a funny kind of +new religion."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Has she got a new religion?" Miss +Debby looked frightened. "I hadn't heard +of it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, yes; Emily says she's got the +funniest religion you ever heard of. Whatever +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 63]</span> +she wants to do or don't want to do, +she says it's her religion."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear me, but I should think that that +would be very convenient," said Miss +Debby, much impressed. "Why, my religion +is always just the opposite of what I +want to do or don't want to do. It says +so every Sunday, you know,—'we have +done those things,' and so forth."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Hers is different," said Mrs. Mead.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, I declare," repeated Miss Debby; +then, suddenly, "I remember now that +Madeleine said that they had waffles because +Jane said that she thought waffles +would taste good, and it was her religion +to do whatever you thought of right off. +Well, I declare!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Both ladies stared in solemn amazement +at one another.</p> + +<p class="indent">"This'll be a nice town to live in, if she +sets everybody to doing whatever you like, +because it's right," Mrs. Mead said finally. +"Father won't put on his coat again this +summer."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 64]</span> +"It'll make a great difference in the feeling +of the town," said Miss Debby, mysteriously, +"a great difference. Well, I hope +it won't change Madeleine any way her +family won't approve. Madeleine's in love, +and I suppose it's Mr. Rath. They knew +each other before, and her family don't +want it. I've pieced it all out of scraps."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, dear!" said Emily Mead's mother, +her face falling; "my, I hadn't heard but +what he was a free man."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, no," said Miss Debby, "your sister +isn't sure. But everybody else is. My own +view of artists is they're deluders and snares. +I give an artist a picture and a dollar once +to enlarge, and that was the last I ever heard +of them both—of all three."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wonder if Emily knows Mr. Rath's +engaged," said Mrs. Mead, sadly. "Dear me, +I never thought of that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Not engaged, but in love," corrected +Miss Debby.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perhaps he's a real artist and changeable," +suggested Mrs. Mead.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 65]</span> +"There's no comfort in that for any one, +'cause if he'll change once, he'll change right +along."</p> + +<p class="indent">Mrs. Mead sighed very heavily. "Well, +I must keep up for Father and Emily," +she remarked, not tracing any very clear +connection between word and deed.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," said Miss Debby, "you must, and +we'll all keep a sharp eye on these new kind +of ways of looking at things, for we don't +know where they'll end."</p> + +<p class="indent">The "new way of looking at things" had +already been very efficacious in the house +at the other end of the street. It had +assumed an utterly new appearance, both +outside and in.</p> + +<p class="indent">"And I never felt nothing like the change +in the <i>feel</i> of it," Susan exclaimed that +afternoon, as she re-arranged her belongings +in her own room. "Oh, you Sunshine +Jane, you, you've just sunshone into every +room, and I'm so happy turning my things +about I don't know what to do. Matilda +wouldn't never let me turn a china cow +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 66]</span> +other end to, and I've lived with some of +the ornaments facing wrong for the whole +of these five long years."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It isn't me, Auntie," said Jane, washing +shelves with the hearty and happy energy +which she threw into every task in which +she engaged; "it's the opening of the windows +and the letting in of God and His +sunshine together. I'll soon have time to +clean the whole house, and then we'll +have fun re-arranging every room. You've +such pretty things, and they must be +rubbed up and given a chance to play a +part in the world. God never meant anything +to be idle,—not even a brass andiron. +If it can't work, it can shine and be cheerful, +anyway. What can't smile ought to shine, +you know."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wonder why rubbing things makes 'em +bright," said Susan, opening her bonnet-box +and hitting her bonnet a smart cuff to +knock dust out of the folds. "I never could +understand that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's your individuality that you transfer +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 67]</span> +till the poor dull things get enough of it to +shine alone, without anybody's help."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What a good reason," said Susan. +"My, to think maybe I'll go to church +again in this bonnet! Matilda was always +wanting to rip it up, but something made +me cling to it. It's a kind of souvenir. +I wore it to husband's funeral and my last +picnic, and there are lots of other pleasant +memories inside it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll freshen it up with a cloth dipped in +ammonia," said Jane. "Dear me, how I <i>do</i> +enjoy washing shelves. I love to sop the +soapy water over and mop the corners, +and dry the whole, and fit a clean newspaper +in, and then see the closet in perfect +order."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You like to do everything, seems to me," +said Susan.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I do. I've been led to see that +doing things well is about the finest way +in which one can pass one's time. And I'm +crazy over doing things <i>well</i>. If I fold a +towel, I like to fold it just square, and if I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 68]</span> +make a bed, I want the fold in the spread +and the fold in the sheet to meet even."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You'll make a fine wife, Jane," said +Susan, gravely, "only no man'll ever appreciate +the folds lying straight."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed merrily. "I'm never going +to marry; I'm one of the new sex, the +creatures who are born to live alone and +lend a hand anywhere. Didn't you know +that?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's nonsense," said Susan; "no +woman's made so."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No. It's a big fact. One of the newest +facts in the world. The New Woman, you +know!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mercy on us," said Susan, "don't +you go in for any of that nonsense. The +idea of a girl like you deciding not to marry! +I never heard of such a thing!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's so, though," said Jane, smiling +brightly; "you see, my little Order is a kind +of Sisterhood. We're taught to want to +help in so many homes and to never even +think of a home of our own. We're taught +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 69]</span> +to love all children so dearly that we mustn't +limit ourselves to one family of little ones. +We're trained to be so fond of the best in +every man that we see more good to be done +as sisters to men than as wives."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't believe Mr. Rath will agree with +you," said Susan, "nor any other real nice +fellow."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was cutting paper for the shelves. +"Yes, he will," she said, nodding confidently; +"men are so scarce nowadays +that they are ready to agree with any +one."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane, <i>I</i> think he's in love with you already." +Susan's tone was very solemn.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane merely laughed.</p> + +<p class="indent">Then the door-bell rang, and she had to +run. Presently she was back, a little +breathless. "It's Mrs. Mead and her +daughter. Can you come down?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, in a minute. You say, in a +minute."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane ran down again with the message.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Most remarkable," said Mrs. Mead, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 70]</span> +now dressed for calling, with her black +hair put back in three even crinkles on +either side, "about your aunt, you know, +I mean. Why, we looked upon her as 'most +dead. You know, Emily, we've always +been given to understand she was nearing +her end."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It does an invalid a lot of good to have +something new to think about," said Jane. +"I'm very enlivening. Aunt Susan just +couldn't help getting up, when she heard +me upsetting her house in all directions."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I expect it was enough to make her +nervous," said Mrs. Mead, sincerely. "How +long are you going to stay?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Until Aunt Matilda comes back."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't believe she'll like these changes," +said Mrs. Mead, gravely. "I should think +that you'd feel a good deal of responsibility. +It's no light matter to leave a +shut-up house and an invalid in bed to a +niece and come home to find the house +open and the invalid all over it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And a man coming in and having waffles +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 71]</span> +in the morning," said Emily Mead, with a +smile meant to be arch.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed. "That was dreadful, +wasn't it?" she said, twinkling—"it was +all so impromptu and funny. And everybody +had such a good time. It just popped +into my head, and you see it's my religion +to have to do anything that you think will +make people happy, if you see a chance."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, we've heard about your religion," +said Mrs. Mead; "dear me, I should think +you'd get into a lot of trouble! Waffles in +the morning would upset some folks, except +on Sunday."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perhaps most people haven't enough +religion to manage them week-days," Jane +suggested.</p> + +<p class="indent">"My aunt, Mrs. Cowmull, says Mr. Rath +could hardly eat any lunch," observed +Emily, smiling some more.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, dear!" said Jane, "but I'm not +surprised. Aunt Susan couldn't, either."</p> + +<p class="indent">Mrs. Mead coughed significantly. "Susan +Ralston's pretty delicate to stand many new +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 72]</span> +ideas, I should think," she began, but +stopped suddenly as Susan entered, and +viewed her with an expression of shocked +surprise.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, Mrs. Ralston, I'd no idea you +were so well. Where have you kept yourself +these last years, if you were so well?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"In my own room," said Susan, with +dignity. "I didn't see no special call to +come down. Matilda knew where everything +was, but Jane doesn't, so I've changed +my ways for a little."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane took her hand and pressed it affectionately. +The sunshine seeds were sprouting +finely. "Don't you want to come out +into the garden with me?" she asked Emily +Mead, and Emily rose at once. "I thought +auntie would enjoy visiting alone with her +old friend," she added, as they passed +through the hall.</p> + +<p class="indent">"What are you, anyway?" Emily asked +curiously. "I've heard you were a trained +nurse,—are you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm one of the brand-new women," +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 73]</span> +said Jane; "not a Suffragette, nor an advanced +anything, but just a creature who +means to give her life up to teaching happiness +as an art."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I heard that. But how do you do +it?" asked Emily Mead.</p> + +<p class="indent">"By being happy and thinking happy +thoughts and doing happy things."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily considered. "But don't you ever +have hard things to do?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Never. I enjoy them all—I love to +work."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily looked at her wonderingly. "But +washing dishes?—We don't keep a girl, +and I hate washing dishes. What would +you say to them?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed. "What, those two lovely +tin pans and that nice boiling kettle? +And all the dirty plates sinking under the +soap-suds and then piling up under the clean +hot water. And the shining dryness and +the putting them on the shelves all in their +own piles. And then the knowing that +God wanted those dishes washed, and that +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 74]</span> +you've done them just exactly as He'd +like to see them done. Why, I think dish-washing +is grand!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily opened her eyes widely. "How +funny you are! I never heard such talk +before! But, then, you've lived in a big +city and learned to think in a big way. +You wouldn't see dish-washing so if you'd +done it all your life and never been told it +was nice. You couldn't."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you've been told now," said Jane, +"and no work need ever seem horrid to you +again. Just look at it in my way after +this."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But all work seems horrid to me. I'd +like to marry an awfully rich man and never +see this place again. I hate it."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane thought a minute; then said in +sweet, low, even tones: "You won't evolve +any man fit to marry out of that spirit, you +know."</p> + +<p class="indent">The other girl stared at her. "Evolve!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes. Don't you know that every +minute in this world is the result of all the +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 75]</span> +minutes that have gone before, and that +who we marry is part of a result—not +just an accident?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"<i>What?</i>"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't you know that? Don't you +understand?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Not a bit. Tell me what you mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's too long to explain right this +minute, because one can't tell such things +quickly, and if you've never studied them, +you haven't the brain-cells to receive them. +You see brain-cells are the houses for +thoughts, and they have to be built and +ready before the thoughts can move in. +That's what they told me, when I was +learning."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily looked at her in bewilderment.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's very interesting," said Jane. "I +think that it's the most interesting thing +in the whole world. You see, I didn't +have any life at all; I was an orphan and +not very bright. And then I happened +to get hold of a book that said that all the +life there was in the world was mine, if +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 76]</span> +I'd just take it. So I wrote to the man who +wrote the book—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"How did you ever dare?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, I knew that the man who wrote +that book would help any one—he couldn't +have written the book if he hadn't been +made to help people—and I asked him +how I could begin."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What did he answer?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"He said: 'Seize every chance to prove +your mind the master of your own body +first, and when you are thoroughly master +of yourself, you can master all else.'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"What did he mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, I took it that he meant me to do +anything that I thought of, right off, and +that if I got in the habit of sweeping all +work out of my small way, I'd soon be +given a chance at big work in a big way."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And were you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes. I began to get through so quick—I +lived with an uncle and helped his wife +with the sewing and the children—that +I had some spare time, and I went into the +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 77]</span> +kitchen and learned to cook. Then one of +the children was ill, and the doctor thought +I'd make a good nurse, so he got me into a +hospital, and I met a woman there who had +all the books that I wanted to read and who +just took hold and helped me right out. +I saw that I didn't want to be a sick-nurse, +because there's such a lot of humbug and +such a lot that's silly, and my friend said +that I was one who would evolve opportunities—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"What does that mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Evolve means to sort of develop out of +the world and yourself together at the same +time."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't understand."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, if you want anything, you want it +because it's there, and you can get it if you've +got the strength and perseverance to build +a road to it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"<i>What!</i>"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I mean just what I say. We can get +anything, if we have sufficient will-power +to build a way right straight to it."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 78]</span> +"Suppose I want to marry a millionaire?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It would mean a lot of well-directed +effort, and the effort would slowly train +you to want something much better than +to live rich and idle." Jane paused a +minute, and Emily looked at her curiously. +"If you want to marry a millionaire bad +enough to start in and make yourself all +over new, you'll have such control over +your future that I think you'll get something +much better than a millionaire."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I never heard any one like you in all my +life," said Emily Mead.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'd be so glad to help you straight +along," Jane said. "I've got two books +with me, and you can read one and then the +other. Then you'll get where you can get +the meaning out of the Bible, and then +you'll begin to see the meaning of everything. +The world gets so wonderful. You +see miracles everywhere. You feel so well. +The sun shines so bright. Life becomes so +lovely."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily looked at her with real wonder.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 79]</span> +"How did you happen to come here?" she +asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, that came long after all the rest of +the story. One day I remembered that +my mother had two sisters, and I wrote +to them. My letter arrived just as Aunt +Matilda's arm began to trouble her, and +she asked me if I could come for a visit. +You see that was another opportunity I +evolved."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily seized her hand impulsively. "I'm +so glad that you came. I'm going to try, +and you'll help me?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, indeed, I will. Would you like +one of the books right now?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I should."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll get it for you, and then I'll tell you +some day about the doctor I met and his +Sunshine Order."</p> + +<p class="indent">They went towards the house. "You +mustn't expect to understand everything +right off, you know," Jane said to her +gently. "You see this is all new to you, +and that means that you can't any more +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 80]</span> +understand right off than you could paint +a picture right off. You have to learn +gradually."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I mean to learn," said Emily.</p> + +<p class="indent">They went in the door, and Jane ran upstairs +and fetched the book. "There!" +she said, "you read it, and I'll help you +all I can. You see the thing is to learn +with your whole heart to do God's will, +and then, in some strange, subtle way, +you get to feel what is coming and to sort +of shape all. It's so fascinating and thrilling +to realize that what you want is marching +towards you as fast as you can march +towards it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What do you want?" Emily asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I want to do exactly what I'm doing," +said Jane, very quietly. "I've passed wanting +anything else. I want lots of chances +to teach and help,—that's all."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't you want to marry?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, no,—I want to be able to teach +and help everywhere. I don't want things +for myself, somehow."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 81]</span> +"How strange!"</p> + +<p class="indent">They went into the sitting-room.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Jane," Susan cried, "how I have +enjoyed hearing about everybody in town! +Sister never told me about Eddy King's +running off with the store cash or Mrs. +Wilton's daughter going to cooking-school, +or one thing."</p> + +<p class="indent">"We must be going," said Mrs. Mead, +rising; "we'll come again, though. It's +good to see you up, Mrs. Ralston, and I +only hope you may stay up. You know +Katie Croft's mother-in-law got up just as +you have and then had a stroke that night."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, is old Mrs. Croft dead?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, she isn't," said Mrs. Mead; "if +she was, she wouldn't be such a warning +as she is."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear, dear," said Susan, "think of all +I've missed. Has she got it just in her +legs or all over? Matilda never told me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Legs," said Mrs. Mead, "and it's +affected her temper. Katie has an awful +time with her."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 82]</span> +"Dear, dear," said Susan again,—"and, +oh, Jane, a boy I've known since he was a +baby has had his skull japanned and nearly +died. Matilda's never told me a thing!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, she didn't know much, you know," +said Mrs. Mead; "she kept herself about as +close as she kept you. We were given to +understand pretty plainly that we weren't +wanted to call."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Think of that now," said Susan, "and +me up-stairs, feeling all my friends had +forgot me!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Everybody'll come now," said Mrs. +Mead; "folks will be glad to see you so +well. We were told you never got up and +hardly ate enough to keep a cat."</p> + +<p class="indent">"An ordinary cat," corrected Emily; +"Miss Matilda's always told what a lot +your cat ate."</p> + +<p class="indent">"He is an eater," said Susan, crinkling +a bit about the eyes; "but I eat, too, now, I +can tell you."</p> + +<p class="indent">After they were gone, Jane came back +into the sitting-room. Her aunt was standing +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 83]</span> +by the window. "It's so beautiful to +be down-stairs," she said, without turning. +"My goodness, and to think that only a +week ago I laid up-stairs wanting to die."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You can thank Aunt Matilda that you +didn't die," said Jane, going and putting her +arm around her. "If she had kept you +thinking of all the illnesses in town, you'd +have died long ago. Sick thoughts are +more catching than diseases. But we don't +need to talk of that now."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, indeed we don't," said Susan, +"for there's Mr. Rath coming."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane gave a little start. "I wonder what +for," she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">"What for!" Susan's tone was full of +deep meaning; "why, he's fallen dead in +love with you, Jane, that's what it means, +and I don't wonder, for you're the nicest +girl I ever saw."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Auntie!" said Jane, quite red. +"The very idea!"</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 84]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="VI" id="VI"></a>CHAPTER VI</h2> + +<p class="h2a">LORENZO RATH</p> + +<p class="indent">IT wasn't to be supposed for a minute that +Lorenzo Rath, a real live young man +and an artist, shouldn't take first place +in the town talk. Jane's remarkable religion +might attract the attention of a few +who were sufficiently religious themselves +to be naturally shocked over the waffles +and depressed over the invalid's recovery, +but Lorenzo was of interest to every one.</p> + +<p class="indent">"If he ain't took already, there's a fine +chance for Emily," Mr. Cattermole said +benevolently to his daughter. Being a man, +he naturally supposed that Mrs. Mead +would never have come by such an idea if +she hadn't had a bright old father to point +it out to her.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Emily doesn't want to marry," said +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 85]</span> +Mrs. Mead, compressing her lips and expanding +her dignity simultaneously; "she +wouldn't marry an artist, anyway."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Maybe he ain't much of an artist," said +Mr. Cattermole, with a tendency to look +on the bright side. "Why don't Emily +want to marry? I thought girls always +wanted to marry. They did when I was +young."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's different nowadays," said Mrs. +Mead, with condescending reserve. "You +don't understand, Father, but nothing is +like it used to be. The world is getting +all changed. When Emily was an only +child, she was looked upon as very odd, +but most women have an only child nowadays. +Life is quite different."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'd like to see Emily married," said Mr. +Cattermole, thoughtfully.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Emily has had plenty of chances," +said her mother, waving the brave, tattered +mother-lie that seems to cover over such +cruel wounds.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Has she really?" said Mr. Cattermole, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 86]</span> +in genuine surprise. "I didn't know that. +And she wouldn't have 'em! Laws sakes! +Who, for instance?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No one you knew," said his daughter, +telling the truth then.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Sarah knew 'em, I suppose?" (Sarah +was Mrs. Cowmull.)</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, no one Sarah knew."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Think of that now! Why, I s'posed +there wasn't nothing Sarah didn't know."</p> + +<p class="indent">In voicing this opinion Mr. Cattermole +voiced the town opinion, too. It was +popularly supposed that Sarah Cowmull +always knew everything. But she didn't +know the status of Lorenzo Rath's heart, +and Lorenzo Rath himself puzzled her not a +little.</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo puzzled everybody, mainly because +he was so open and simple that even +a child must have suspected him of keeping +something back. Such frankness was unthinkable, +such innocence incredible.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, he's gallivanting all over with +Madeleine, and yet she's gotten another +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 87]</span> +man's picture on her table!" said Miss +Debby to Katie Croft.</p> + +<p class="indent">"And he's skipping in Mrs. Ralston's +gate at all hours," said Katie Croft—"no +kind of ceremony to him. The other day +he see mother in the window, and he waved +his hat at her and give her an awful turn. +She don't see well, and thought he threw a +stone at her. She ain't used to city ways; +she's used to country ways. I had to let +her smell camphor for a good hour, and +while she was smelling, the kitchen fire +went out. I wish he'd keep his hat on +his head another time. My life's hard +enough without having a artist suddenly +set to, to cheer up mother."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What do you think of Mrs. Ralston's +niece? Think she's nice?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Nice! With Susan Ralston about as +lively as a cricket! I don't think much of +such new ways. I don't know whatever +Matilda will say. She's just got life all +systematized, and now here's Susan up and +out of bed. I'm so scared the girl'll come +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 88]</span> +over and go at mother, I don't know what +to do."</p> + +<p class="indent">"My, suppose Mrs. Croft was to be up +and about!" said Miss Debby, opening +her eyes widely. "Whatever would you +do?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do! I know what I'd do." Young +Mrs. Croft looked dark and mysterious. +"I know just exactly what I'll do. And +I'm all ready to do it, and if I'm interfered +with, I will do it,—good and quick, +too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"How is old Mrs. Croft now?" Miss +Debby asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, she's grabbin' as ever. I never see +such a disposition. She's always catching +at me or the cat or something. Seems to +consider it a way of attracting attention. +Crazy folks has such crazy ideas, and she's +crazy,—crazy as a loon."</p> + +<p class="indent">Katie Croft took up her market basket +and went on up the street. Miss Debby +stayed behind to wait for the noon mail. +"Katie's so bitter," she said to herself, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 89]</span> +shaking her head; "she ought to be more +grateful for being supported."</p> + +<p class="indent">Miss Debby forgot that there are few +things so irritating in this world as being +supported. It is a situation which has +become especially unpopular lately, particularly +with women and political motives.</p> + +<p class="indent">But no old worn-out aphorism held for +one minute in the breezy bloom of the House +Where Jane Lived.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I'm so happy," Susan exclaimed +many times daily, "I'm so happy. I never +felt nothing like your sunshining in all my +life before, you Sunshine Jane, you! I +feel like my own cupboards, all unlocked +and aired and nice and used again."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane stopped caroling as she kneaded +bread and laughed—which sounded equally +pleasant.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm as happy as you are, Auntie; it's +so nice to be in heaven."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I used to think maybe I'd die suddenly +and find myself there some day," said +Susan. "I'm glad I didn't."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 90]</span> +"It's better to live suddenly than to die +suddenly," said Jane, merrily; "when people +are awfully bothered sometimes, I've +heard their friends say: 'But if you died +suddenly, it would work out somehow,' +and I wanted to say: 'Why not live suddenly +instead of dying suddenly, and then everything's +bound to come out splendidly.'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Jane, what a grand idea,—to +live suddenly! That's what I've done, +surely."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," said Jane, "that's what I did, too. +Instead of fading out of life, we just bloomed +into life. It's just as easy, and a million +times more fun."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And it's all so awfully agreeable," said +Susan. "My things look so nice, all set +different, and it's so pleasant having folks +coming in, and I like it all, and we haven't +to fuss with the garden."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I attend to the garden!" cried a +voice outside, and a mysterious hand shoved +a basket of peas over the window-ledge.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know who that is," said Susan; "it's +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 91]</span> +that boy, and he's smelt cinnamon rolls and +come to lunch. How do you do?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo, brown and merry, was getting in +at the window.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, you've really been weeding!" +exclaimed Susan.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course! I've tended the garden ever +since you gave it up."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I declare! Well, I never. Jane, we +must give him a bite of something."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, that's what I came for," said +Lorenzo, cheerfully, "cookies, jelly-roll,—anything +simple and handy. Madeleine +and I were out walking, discussing our +affairs, and when I stopped for the garden, +she went on for her mail. I'm awfully +hungry."</p> + +<p class="indent">"People say you're engaged to her," +said Susan. Jane turned to get the tin of +cookies.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, naturally. People say so much. +She is a pretty girl, isn't she?—but then +there's Emily Mead. I must look at +myself on all sides and consider carefully. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 92]</span> +Old Mr. Cattermole took me to drive +yesterday and told me that he was healthy +and his dead wife was healthy and that, +except for what killed him, Mr. Mead was +healthy, too; and there was Emily, perfectly +healthy and the only grandchild, +and why didn't I come over often,—it +wasn't but a step."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, you do beat all," said Susan. +Jane offered the tin of cookies. Lorenzo +took six. They were all laughing.</p> + +<p class="indent">Later, when he'd gone away, Susan said, +almost shyly this time: "Jane, I don't +want to interfere, but he <i>is</i> in love."</p> + +<p class="indent">"With Madeleine?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"With you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Auntie," Jane came to her side, "you +mustn't speak in that way about me. +I can't marry,—not possibly. I'm a Sunshine +Nurse, and I shall be a Sunshine Nurse +till I die. I'll make homes happy, but I +shall never have one of my own."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan looked frightened and timid. "But +why?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 93]</span> +"For many reasons. And all good ones."</p> + +<p class="indent">There was that in the young girl's tone +that ended the subject for the time being.</p> + +<p class="indent">But Susan thought of it a great deal, and +alone in her room that night, Jane thought, +too. She had made herself ready for bed, +and then sat down by the window, clasping +her hands on the sill. Lorenzo Rath was +buoyantly dear and jolly, and she realized +that he was the nicest man that she had +ever met. It had all been fun, great fun, +and she had enjoyed it mightily. But with +all her learning Jane was not so very much +farther along the Highway to Happiness +than some others. In many cases she was +only a holder of keys as yet—the distinct +knowledge to be gained by unlocking secrets +with their aid was as yet not hers. To hold +the keys and look at the doors is to realize +what power means,—but to unlock is to +use it. Jane was still a novice; she left the +doors locked and was content to hold the +keys, and no more.</p> + +<p class="indent">The next night Lorenzo appeared again. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 94]</span> +"I'm half-dead," he said. "I've tramped +twelve miles, sketching."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear, dear," said Susan, "seems like +nobody in this world ever wants what's close +to."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Sometimes it's no use to want what's +close to," said Lorenzo, "or else what's +close to is like Emily Mead, and you just +ache to run."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Emily Mead is a very nice girl," said +Jane, in a tone clearly reproachful.</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo just laughed. But then Susan +made some excuse to slip away. "I wonder +if you'd help me a little," he said then, +hesitating a bit.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Is it something that I can do? Of +course I'll help you if I can."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's something very necessary."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Necessary?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"To my welfare and happiness."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What is it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think—I'm—falling in love."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, dear," Jane was carefully tranquil.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've never really been in love in my +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 95]</span> +life, so I can't be sure. But I think it's +that."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane said nothing. The room was getting +dark.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've never seen any one so pretty in all +my life as Miss Mar," said the young artist, +slowly. "You know we're old friends."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, she's lovely," said Jane, with sudden +fervor.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I thought that we might make up +little picnics and walks and things?" hesitated +the young man.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course," said Jane, heartily. "And +you can come here all you like. Auntie likes +you both so much."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo Rath stood by the door. "Were +you ever in love?" he asked bluntly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No," said Jane. "I've never had the +least little touch of it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Haven't you ever thought about it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, I've never had time. I've never +seen any man that I could or would +marry."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Never?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 96]</span> +"Never."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's too bad," said Lorenzo Rath +slowly. "Seems to me you'd make such a +splendid wife."</p> + +<p class="indent">She laughed a little. Then she had to +wink quickly to drive back tears which +leapt suddenly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I won't say any more," said Lorenzo. +She thought that he did not care to speak of +Madeleine to her.</p> + +<p class="indent">Then she went. And later she found +herself sitting in her own room again, sitting +by the same window, thinking. +"Poor Emily Mead and her illusory millionaire! +I'm about as silly as she is," +thought Jane. "And yet I know it's +higher and more beautiful to make life +lovely for others than to make it lovely +for one's self." She sighed because the reflection—all +altruistic as it was—was +not quite the truth, and she was true enough +herself to feel jarred by the slightest cross-shadow +of falsehood. Truth plays as +widely and freely as the sunbeams themselves +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 97]</span> +and goes as straight to the heart +of each and all.</p> + +<p class="indent">Finally she opened a little book and read +aloud a few pages to herself in a low tone. +"I know I'm on the right path," she said, +when she had closed the book; "the thing +is to stick resolutely to keeping on straight +ahead. And I must be absolutely content +with all that comes. You have to be +content if you're going to grow in goodness, +for you have to know that you've been +trying and been successful." She sat still +a while longer and then rose with a deep, +long breath. "Well, to-day's been something, +and to-morrow I'll be something +better, I know."</p> + +<p class="indent">The truth did shine then, and she went +to bed calmed, but was hardly stretched +down between the cool sheets when Susan +rapped at the door.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Come in."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Jane, I can't sleep. I've got to +thinking of when Matilda comes back, +and I'm scared blue."</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 98]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="VII" id="VII"></a>CHAPTER VII</h2> + +<p class="h2a">A NEW OUTLOOK ON MATILDA</p> + +<p class="indent">THE next morning Susan looked half-sheepish +and half-anxious. "I just +couldn't help it, Jane. I laid in bed so +long, thinking, and then it come over me +what life was going to be when she was +back and you gone and—well—I just +couldn't help coming. I felt awful."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was busy with breakfast. "I +know, Auntie, I know. I ought to have +thought of Aunt Matilda sooner. Half +her stay is over."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, my, I should say it was," wailed +Susan; "that's what scares me so. We're +so happy, and the time is going so fast. +It's about the most awful thing I ever +knew."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane began beating eggs for an omelette.</p> + +<p class="indent">"We never were one bit alike," Susan +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 99]</span> +intoned mournfully; "we were always so +different, and then when husband died, +there was just nothing to do but for us to +live together. She's my only sister, and +it's right that I should humor her, but, oh +my, what a scratch-about life she has led +me. I was getting to feel more like a +mouse than a woman—soon as I got a +bite, I'd begin to tremble and to listen and +then how I <i>did</i> run!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"But it will be all so different when she +comes back," Jane said cheerily. "She'll +be very different, and so will you. It'll +be just like I told you last night."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know,—I know. But somehow I +can't see it as you do. I'm all upset. +And I'm so happy without her. We're +so happy. The house looks beautiful. +You've just made everything over. I declare, +Jane, I never saw anything like you. +All my old things have turned new, and so +pretty. I feel like a bride. That is, I +feel like a bride when I ain't thinking of +Matilda."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 100]</span> +"It looks very nice, surely," said Jane, +smiling. "Your things were so pretty, +anyhow. But what I was gladdest about +was to really get it all opened up and fresh. +I didn't want any one to come while it +was so gloomy. The whole town may +call now."</p> + +<p class="indent">"They do, too," said Susan, diverted +for the minute; "they certainly do. Oh, +it is so nice, I so adore to hear all about +things again. Matilda just shut everybody +out. She didn't like company."</p> + +<p class="indent">"She was pretty busy, you know."</p> + +<p class="indent">"She hadn't any more to do than you +have. She hadn't so much to do as you +have, because she didn't do a thing you do."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you were ill. She was always up +and down stairs—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, she wasn't, Jane. No, she wasn't."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, she had your meals to carry upstairs."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't call it meals to run with a teacup. +Meals! <i>Such</i> meals! It's a wonder +I didn't die. She'd turn anything upside +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 101]</span> +down on a plate and something else upside +down on that, and call it a meal for +me. I was about sick, just from how she +fed me. If I said something was cooked +too dry, she emptied the tea-kettle into it +next time; and if I said anything was too +wet, she put on fresh coal and left it in +the oven over night. If I said the room +was too light, she shut it up as dark as a +pickpocket; and if I said it was too dark, +she turned the sun into my eyes. She's +my only sister and I must humor her, but +I've had a very hard time, Jane, and I +don't blame myself for waking up with my +teeth all of a chatter over the thought of +living with her again."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane had their breakfast ready now on +the table by the window. "Come and sit +down," she said; "we'll talk while we eat. +It's like I told you last night,—there must +be a hitch somewhere. Of course, God has +a good reason for you and Aunt Matilda +living together. He doesn't allow accidents +in His world."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 102]</span> +"Perhaps He wasn't thinking. I can't +believe that anybody would deliberately +put anybody in the house with Matilda—not +if they knew Matilda. I didn't +know what she'd grown into myself when +she first came to take care of me, because +I was a little poorly. It was to save spending +on a nurse, you know. They're such +trying, prying things, nurses are."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm a nurse, you know."</p> + +<p class="indent">"My goodness, I didn't mean your kind; +I meant the regular kind."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was laughing. "But I mustn't +laugh," she said, after a minute; "we must +go to work. Let's see if we can find out +how it all began. Didn't you and Aunt +Matilda get on nicely at first?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan considered. "Well, I don't believe +we did. She was always so very +sparing. Husband was sparing, and of +course I'd had a good many years of it, +but when your husband's gone and you've +got the property yourself and have left it to +an only sister who takes care of you, you +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 103]</span> +don't like her being even more sparing,—putting +you on skim-milk right from the first and +chopping the potato peelings in the hash."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But there must have been some good +in the situation, or it wouldn't have been. +When there's a wrong situation, the cure +lies in hunting out the good, not in talking +over the bad."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You won't find any good in Matilda +and me living together,—not if you hunt +till Doomsday." Susan took a big sip of +coffee and then shook her head hard.</p> + +<p class="indent">"There's good in everything."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't know what it was here, then. +I was all ready to die, and the doctor said +I couldn't live, and when I found out how +Matilda was counting on it, I just made up +my mind to live just to spite her. But it's +been awful hard work."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane turned and seized her hand. "Well, +maybe that's the reason for the situation, +then. You see if she'd been different, you'd +have died, but being a person who made +you mad, you stayed alive."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 104]</span> +Susan laughed a little. "I've been mad +enough, I know," she went on; "it's awful +to be up-stairs the way I've been and +have to prowl down-stairs and run off with +your food like a dog in an alley. I was +always watching till I saw Matilda over +that second fence and then racing for something +to eat. I've been very hungry often +and often, Jane, very hungry indeed,—and +in my own house, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">The tears came into the girl's eyes. +"Poor Auntie!" she said. "Well, it's all +over now and won't ever come back. You +must believe me when I say so. Old conditions +never return. The wheel can't +turn backward. That mustn't be."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But how'll it help it when Matilda's +visit gets over?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane rested her chin on her hands and +looked out of the window. "I'll have to +get you on to a plane where you can't +live as you did ever again," she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">"On a plane!—" Susan stared.</p> + +<p class="indent">"A plane is a kind of grade in life. We +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 105]</span> +keep going up them like stairs, and the +quieter and happier people live, the higher +is the plane on which they are. It's very +simple, when you come to understand it. +It's sort of like a marble staircase built +out of a marsh and on up a mountain. +You can stand down in the mud, or step +higher in the reeds, or step higher in the +water (generally it's hot water," Jane +interrupted herself to say with a little +smile). "Or out on the dry earth, or +higher where it's flowers, or higher or higher. +But every time you get up a step you leave +all the mess of all the lower steps behind +you forever. Do you understand?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, I don't."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, don't you see that if you lift +yourself higher than your surroundings, of +course you'll have other conditions around +you and be really living another life? We +can't possibly be bound by conditions lower +than our souls. It's a law. I'll help you +to understand it, and then it will help you +to not be at all troubled over Aunt Matilda. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 106]</span> +You'll be above her. Don't you see? One +can always get out of a disagreeable life by +lifting one's self above it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I did stay up-stairs," said Susan, +with beautiful literalness. "I think it's +awful to have to keep a plane above any +one, when the whole house is yours."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I didn't mean that," said Jane. "I +meant that mentally you must get above +her. It isn't in words or in thoughts,—you +must <i>be</i> above her. You must get +free. I must help you. You can do it. +Anybody can do it. And as soon as you +are free in your spirit, your life will change. +Our daily life follows our thoughts. Our +thoughts make a pattern, and life weaves +it. The world of stars that we can't +hardly grasp at all is all God's thought. +The life in this house was your thought +and Aunt Matilda's."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It wasn't mine," said Susan quickly; +"it was hers."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, it's mine now," said Jane. +"That's the true business of the Sunshine +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 107]</span> +Nurses. They must get a new thought into +a house and get it to growing well. Then +they'll leave the true sunshine there forever +after."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's eyes were very curious—very +bright. "I declare I don't see how you'll +do it here," she said. "I can't look at +Matilda any new way, as I know of. Whatever +she does, she does just exactly as I +don't like it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I suppose that you try her, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, I didn't die; of course she minded +that. But I couldn't die. You can't die +just to order."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, of course not; I didn't mean that." +Jane was quite serious. "I don't blame +you at all for not doing that."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan had finished and rose from the +table. "Let's leave the dishes and go +out in the yard," she said. "I'm awfully +anxious to keep on at this till we find a way +out, if you think that you can; I go about +wild when I think of her. I'm ready for +anything except staying in bed any more."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 108]</span> +"Oh, that's all over," said Jane. +"You're off the bed-plane now, and don't +you see how much higher you've got already? +The next step is to fix yourself +so securely on this happy one that you +know that it's yours and you can't leave +it. You see, you feel able to go back down +again, and as long as you feel that way, +it's possible. One has to bar out the wrong +kind of life forever, and then of course it's +over."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But she is coming back," said Susan, +"and I can't live any more on gobbles of +milk and cold bits swallowed while I'm +getting up-stairs three steps to the jump."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked at her. "I expect that +exercise was awfully good for you, Auntie," +she said seriously. "You've probably gotten +a lot of health and interest out of it. +Don't forget that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, maybe; but I don't want any +more." Susan's tone was terribly earnest.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's all over then," said Jane, slowly +and with emphasis; "if you truly and +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 109]</span> +honestly don't want any more, then it +must be all over. The thing to do now is +to build a firm connection between ourselves +and it's being all over."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't quite understand what you +mean," said Susan, "but something's got +to be done, of course, because otherwise +she'll come home, and oh, my, her face +when she sees me up and around!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane knit her brows. "You see, Auntie," +she said slowly, "there's only one thing to +do. We've got to change ourselves completely; +we've to get where we want her +to come home and where we look forward +to it—"</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan stopped short and lifted up both +hands. "Gracious, we can't ever do that! +It isn't in humanity."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, we can do it," said Jane firmly; +"people can always do anything that they +can think out, and if we can think this out +straight, we can do it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"How?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It isn't easy to see in just the first +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 110]</span> +minute, but I understand the principle of +it and I know that we can work it, for +I've seen it done. You do it by getting +an entirely new atmosphere into the house."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you've done that already," interrupted +Susan. "It isn't musty anywhere +any more, and there's such a kind +of a happy smell instead."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't mean that kind of an atmosphere. +I mean a change of feeling in ourselves. +We've got to somehow make ourselves +all over; we must really and truly +be different."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I am made over, and you were all +right, anyhow."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, I'm not all right," said Jane firmly. +"I'm very wrong. I'm letting silly +thoughts with which I've no business torment +me dreadfully, and I'm not driving +them out with any kind of resolution. +Then we're both doing wrong about Aunt +Matilda. We're making a narrow little +black box of our opinion and crowding her +into it all the time. There's nothing so +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 111]</span> +dreadful as the way families just chain +one another to their faults. Outsiders +see all the nice things, and we have lots +of courage to always live up to their opinions, +but families spend most of their +time just nailing those they love best into +pretty little limits. You and I are so +happy together, and we're changing ourselves +and one another every day, but we +never think that Aunt Matilda's also having +experience and changing herself, too. +We kind of forbid her to grow better."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You won't find anything that will +change Matilda very quick, Jane. She's +a dreadful person to stick to habits; she's +drunk out of the blue cup and give me the +green one for these whole five years."</p> + +<p class="indent">"The change in the atmosphere of the +house," said Jane slowly, "must be complete. +We must never say one more word +about her that isn't nice, and we mustn't +even think unkind thoughts. We must +talk about her lots and look forward to +her coming back—"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 112]</span> +"Oh, heavens, I can't," gasped Susan.</p> + +<p class="indent">"We'll begin to-day on her room—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Then you'll make her madder than a +hatter, sure; she can't bear to have her +room touched."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm going to make it the prettiest room +in the house," said Jane resolutely. "I'm +going to brush and clean and mend and fix +all those clothes she's left hanging up, and +I'm going to love her dearly from now on."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan sat still, her lips moving slightly, +but whether with repressed feeling or +trembling sentiment it would be impossible +to say. "She looked awful cute +when she was little and wore pantalettes," +she said finally.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Bravo!" cried Jane, running to her +and kissing her. "There's a fine victory +for you, and now,"—her face brightening +suddenly,—"I've got an idea of what we +can do to lift us right straight up into a +new circle of life. What do you say to +our making the little back parlor over +into a bedroom, and—"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 113]</span> +"—taking Mr. Rath to board?" cried +Susan joyfully. "Oh, I am sure that he +wanted to come all along."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed outright. "No, indeed, +the very idea! No, what I thought of +was inviting that poor old Mrs. Croft here +for a week and giving her and her daughter-in-law +a rest from one another."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan gave a sharp little yell. "Why, +Jane Grey, I never heard the beat! +Why, she can't even feed herself!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It would be a way to change the atmosphere +of the house; it's just the kind of +thing that would change us all—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I should think it would change us all," +interrupted Susan; "why, she threw a +cup of tea at Katie's back last week. Katie +said she couldn't possibly imagine what +had come over her,—she was leaning out +to hook the blinds."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It would be a Bible-lovely thing to do," +Jane went on slowly. "You or I could +feed her, and I'd take care of her. I'm +a nurse, you know!"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 114]</span> +"Jane! Well, you beat all! Well, I +never did! Old Mrs. Croft. Why, they +say you might as well be gentle with a +hornet."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Maybe she has her reasons; maybe it's,—Set +a hornet to tend a hornet, for all we +know. Anyway, it's come to me as some +good to do, and when I think of any good +that I can do, I have to do it,—else it's +a sin. That's my religion."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That religion of yours'll get you into +a lot of hot water along through life." +Susan's tone was very grave. "And you've +never seen old Mrs. Croft, or you'd never +speak of her and religion in the same +breath. They've got a cat she caresses, +and some days she caresses it for all she's +worth. I've heard the cat being caressed +when it was quiet, myself, many's the +time. You can't use that religion of yours +on old Mrs. Croft; she isn't a subject for +religion. She's one of that kind that the +man in the Bible thanked God he wasn't +one of them."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 115]</span> +"My religion is what brought me here +to you," said Jane gently. "You aren't +really sorry that I learned it, are you, +Auntie?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's eyes moistened quickly. She +gasped, then swallowed, then made up her +mind. "Well, Sunshine Jane," she said +resignedly, "when shall we get her?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"We'll put her room in order to-morrow +morning, and I'll go and ask her in the +afternoon."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, dear!" said Susan, with a world of +meaning in the two syllables. "I hope +she'll enjoy the change."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed. "Goodness, Auntie, I +never saw any one pick up new ideas as +quick as you do. I was months learning +how to make myself over, and you do it in +just a few hours. You must have laid a +big foundation of self-control up there in +bed."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan sighed, uncheered. "It kept me +pretty sharp, I tell you," she said; "when +you're always hungry and have to get +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 116]</span> +your food on the sly and be positively sure +of never being found out, it does keep you +in trim being spry pretty steady."</p> + +<p class="indent">"May we come in?" asked voices at +the gate. It was Lorenzo Rath and Madeleine. +"We wanted to see how you were +getting on to-day," the latter called.</p> + +<p class="indent">"We've been changing the furniture and +the atmosphere," said Susan, trying bravely +to smile. "Jane is turning everything +around and bringing the bright new side +out."</p> + +<p class="indent">"If you'll come and help me wash the +breakfast dishes and then make biscuits," +Jane said to Madeleine, "I'll ask you both +to lunch."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I want to learn how to do everything, +of course," said Madeleine.</p> + +<p class="indent">"And why shouldn't we go down to the +garden?" suggested Lorenzo to Susan. +"You'll point out the things you want +to-day, and I'll pull 'em up."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But there are fences to climb," said +Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 117]</span> +"Fiddle for fences," said her aunt; +"he'll go ahead, and I'll skim over 'em like +a squirrel. I never made anything of +fences."</p> + +<p class="indent">So they divided the labor.</p> + +<p class="indent">"The house looks so pretty," said Madeleine, +as she and Jane went through to the +kitchen. "How do you ever manage it,—with +just the same things, too?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane glanced about. "Why, there's a +right place for everything, and if you just +stand back a bit and let the things have +time to think, they'll tell you where to put +them. There was an old blue vase in the +dining-room that was pretty weak-minded, +but I was patient and carried it all over +the place till finally it was suited on top of +the what-not in the corner of the hall. +The trouble with most things is that we +hurry them too much at first, and then we +don't help them out of their false position +later."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Jane, you are so delightfully quaint. +You must tell Mr. Rath that. It's the +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 118]</span> +kind of speech that will just charm the +soul right out of an artist."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was deep in the flour-bin. "But +I don't want to charm his soul. I'll leave +that to you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"To me! Why, he doesn't care a rap +about me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, then, to Emily Mead."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Emily Mead! Oh, my dear, you have +put a lot of new ideas into her head! She +says that you told her that any one could +get anything that he or she wanted."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And so they can."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Suppose she wants Mr. Rath?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"If she wants him in the right way, +she'll have him."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't like that way of speaking of +men," said Madeleine, dipping her white +fingers into the flour and beginning to chip +the butter through it. "Don't you think +it's horrid how girls speak of men nowadays? +I do."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course I do," said Jane. "But one +drops into the habit just because everybody +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 119]</span> +does it. I'll never be married myself, +and it's partly because I think it's all +being so dragged down. Instead of two +people's knowing one another and liking +one another better till finally a big, beautiful, +holy secret sort of dawns on them +and makes the world all over new, girls +just go on and act as if men were wild +animals to be hunted and caught and +talked about, or married and made fun +of. I don't think all these new ideas +and new ways for women have made +women a bit more womanly. When I had +to earn my living, I picked out work that +a man couldn't do, and that I wouldn't +be hurting any man by doing. I'm sorry +for men nowadays. And I think women +lose a lot the way some of them go on."</p> + +<p class="indent">"After all, there can't be anything nicer +than to be a woman, can there?" said +Madeleine, stirring as the other poured in +ingredients. "I've always been glad that +I was a woman. I think that a woman's +life is so sweet, and it's beautiful to be protected +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 120]</span> +and cared for." The pink flew over +her cheeks at the words.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane's lashes swept downward for a +minute, then rose resolutely. "Or to protect +and care for others. It always seems +to me as if a woman was the sort of blessed +way through which a man's love and +strength and care go to his children. Men +are so helpless with children, but they do +such a lot for wives, and then the mothers +pass it on to the little ones."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Life's lovely when you think of it +rightly, isn't it?" Madeleine said thoughtfully. +"I'm so pleased over having come +here. You see Father and Mother wanted +me to spend a few weeks quietly where I +could rest and pick myself up a little, and +so they sent me here. I didn't care much +about coming, but I'm glad now. You're +doing me lots of good, Jane; you seem to +help me to unlock the doors to everything +that's just best in me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It isn't that I do it," said Jane; "it's +that it's been done to me, and after it got +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 121]</span> +through me, it's bound to shine on. It's +like light; every window you clean lets it +through into another place, where maybe +there's something else to clean and let it +through again."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I suppose we just live to keep clean and +let light through," laughed Madeleine, +cutting out the biscuits.</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's all."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think that you'd make a good +preacher, Jane; you've such nice, plain, +homely, understandable ways of putting +things."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed and popped the pan into +the oven. "Come and help lay the table," +she said. "Oh, you never saw anything +as sweet as Aunt Susan's joy in her own +things. She's like a little child at Christmas. +It's a kind of coming back to life +for her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"They say that her sister was awfully +mean to her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But she wasn't at all. She thought +that she was sicker than she was, and she +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 122]</span> +kept her in bed, and the joke of it was that +Aunt Susan didn't like to hurt her feelings +by letting her see what mistaken ideas she +had, so she hopped up every time the coast +was clear and kept lively and interested +trying to be about and in bed at once."</p> + +<p class="indent">"How perfectly delightful! I never +heard anything so funny. And then you +came and discovered the truth."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, I didn't want her to stay in bed. +I'd never encourage any one in a false +belief, but she hadn't the belief,—she had +only the false appearance. She didn't +enjoy being an invalid one bit."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think it's too droll," said Madeleine. +"Didn't you laugh when it dawned on you +first?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It dawned on me rather sadly. But we +laugh together now."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What will she do when her sister comes +back?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, that will all come out nicely. I +don't know just how, but I know that it +will come out all right."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 123]</span> +"Do you always have faith in things +coming out rightly?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Always. I wouldn't dare not to. I'm +one of those people who kind of feel the +future as it draws near, and so I wouldn't +allow myself to feel any mean future drawing +near, on principle. I always feel that +nice things are marching straight towards +me as fast as ever the band of music plays."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you believe that it really makes any +difference?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course it makes a difference. It +makes all the difference in the world, because +hope's a rope by which any good +thing can haul you right up to it, hand +over hand."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You give me a lot to think about," +said Madeleine.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane ran out and picked some ivy leaves +to place under the vase of flowers in the +middle of the table. It made a little green +mat. "There; we're all ready when they +come, now," she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">Presently they did come.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 124]</span> +"Oh, what will Mrs. Cowmull say to +this!" said Lorenzo, as he pulled out Mrs. +Ralston's chair. "She's busy marking passages +in <i>The Seven Lamps of Architecture</i> +to read aloud to me while I eat, and now +I shan't show up at all."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Have you seen her niece lately?" +asked Madeleine.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I saw her this morning. She +wants to pose for me, only she stipulated +that she should wear clothes. I told her +that my models all wore thick wool and +only showed a little of their faces. She +didn't seem to like that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But what did you mean? Surely you +don't always have them wear thick +woolen?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I just do. If they haven't thick wool +on, I won't paint them at all."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What do you mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, I paint sheep."</p> + +<p class="indent">The mild little joke met with great favor.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think you're a very clever young +man," Susan said with great sincerity. "To +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 125]</span> +think of me having a good time laughing +with a sheep painter," she added. "Who +holds them for you to paint, and do you +set them afterwards?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I paint them right in the fields," said +Lorenzo.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I should think they'd butt you from +behind."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I paint over a fence."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, that's safe," said Jane's aunt. +"If you're careful not to be on the side +where there's a bull."</p> + +<p class="indent">After supper Madeleine helped Jane wash +the dishes.</p> + +<p class="indent">"What fun you make out of everything," +she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's the only way," Jane answered. +"My mission is to make two sunbeams +shine where only one slanted."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm glad I'm one of the heathen to +whom you were sent," said Madeleine +affectionately.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane put her arm around her. "So am +I, dear, very glad."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 126]</span> +Madeleine laid her face against the other +girl's. "Some day I want to tell you a +secret," she said; "a secret that Lorenzo +told me yesterday."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane felt her heart sort of skip a beat. +"Do tell me," she said in a whisper.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't now," said Madeleine. "I +want to be all alone with you. It's too—too +big a secret to bear to be broken in +upon."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Can you come to-morrow afternoon? +Auntie's going to Mrs. Mead's to the Sewing +Society, and I'll be here alone."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That will be nice," said Madeleine; +"yes, I'll come."</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 127]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="VIII" id="VIII"></a>CHAPTER VIII</h2> + +<p class="h2a">SOUL-UPLIFTING</p> + +<p class="indent">IT was the next morning about eleven +o'clock.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You see," said Jane, sitting in the +Crofts' sitting-room opposite Katie Croft +who, whatever else she might or might not +be, was certainly not pleasant of expression, +"you see, my aunt has been an invalid so +much that she appreciates what a change +means to both the sick one and the one +who cares for her, and so we thought that +it would be so nice if you'd let me wheel +your mother—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"She ain't my mother—she's my +mother-in-law," broke in Mrs. Katie Croft, +instantly indignant over so false an imputation. +"Good lands, the very idea! +My mother! And never one single stroke +of paralysis nor nothing in my family, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 128]</span> +and all reading the Bible without glasses +right up till they died."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You see, it would give you a little rest, +too," Jane continued, "and it would do +Aunt Susan good to feel that she was +helping a weaker—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"She ain't weak," broke in Katie Croft, +again; "my lands, she's strong as a +lady-ox. Anything she makes up her mind +to keep she lays hold of with a grip as +makes you fairly sick all up and down your +back. You don't know perhaps, Miss +Grey, as my husband died in our youth, +and I come to live with his mother as a +sacred duty, and I tell you frankly that +I wish I'd never been born or that he'd +never been born, forty times an hour—I +do."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You'll like a week alone, I'm sure," +said Jane serenely, "and we'll like to +have your mother-in-law. Perhaps she'll +get a few new ideas—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"She's stubborn as a mule," interrupted +the daughter-in-law.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 129]</span> +"But may I see her and ask her? I do +so want to help you a little. Life must +have been so hard for you these last +years."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Hard!" said Katie Croft, with emphasis. +"Hard! Well, I'll tell you what +it is, Miss Grey,—to marry a young man +as was meek as Moses and then have him +just fade right straight out and get a +mother-in-law like that old—that old—that +old—well, I'll tell you frankly she's +a siren and nothing else." (Young Mrs. +Croft probably meant "vixen," but Jane +did not notice.) "My life ain't really +worth a shake-up of mustard and vinegar +some days. What I have suffered!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know more than you think," said +Jane sympathetically; "nurses take care of +so many kinds of people. But do let me +ask her. If she likes to come to us, it'll +be a great rest to you, and perhaps it'll +do her a little good, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't understand you're wanting her," +said Katie. "It's all over town how queer +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 130]</span> +you are, but I never thought that anybody +could be as queer as that!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do let us go to her," Jane urged.</p> + +<p class="indent">Katie rose and forthwith conducted the +caller to old Mrs. Croft's room, a large, +square place adorned with no end of black +daguerreotypes and faded photographs.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mother, it's Miss Grey. You know?—she's +Mrs. Ralston's niece."</p> + +<p class="indent">Old Mrs. Croft received her visitor with +acutely suspicious eyes. "Well?" she said +tartly.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane took her hand, but she jerked it +smartly away.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Sit down anywhere," said Katie; "she +hears well."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Hear!" said old Mrs. Croft. "I +should say I did hear. There ain't a pan +fell in the neighborhood for the last ten +years as hasn't woke me out of a sound +sleep, dreaming of my husband—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Miss Grey's come to see you about +something," interrupted Katie; "she—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I had a husband," continued old Mrs. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 131]</span> +Croft, raising her voice from Do to Re, +"and such a one! Wednesday he'd go to +sleep and Thursdays he'd wake, so regular +you could tell the days of the week just +from his habits. He—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Miss Grey wants—" interrupted +Katie.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I came to—" said Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I had a husband," continued old +Mrs. Croft, going from Re to Mi now; +"oh, my, but I did have a husband. In +May I had him and in December I had him, +but he was always the same to me. You +can see his picture there, Miss Grey; it's +all faded out, just from being looked at; +but I'll tell you where it never fades, Miss +Grey—it never so much as turns a hair +in my heart. My heart is engraved—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"You'd better go on and say what you've +got to say," said Katie to Jane. "I often +put her to bed talking, and she talks all +the night through."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I want to ask you—" Jane began.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Ask me no questions and I'll tell +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 132]</span> +you no lies," sang Mrs. Croft. "Oh, I +had—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"—I want you to come and stay with +us," Jane said, with forceful accents.</p> + +<p class="indent">There was a sudden tense hush.</p> + +<p class="indent">"My aunt and I want you to come and +make us a little visit," the caller added.</p> + +<p class="indent">The hush grew awful.</p> + +<p class="indent">"A little change would be so good for +you—you've been shut up so long."</p> + +<p class="indent">Old Mrs. Croft lifted her two hands +towards the ceiling.</p> + +<p class="indent">"What do you want to take me out of +my own house for? Going to do something +to it that I wouldn't approve, I +expect. Oh, I see it all. There was Macbeth +and there was Othello, and now there's +my house—What are you going to do to +it, anyhow?" The question was pitched +so high and sharp that Jane jumped.</p> + +<p class="indent">"We just want to give you a little +change."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Change! I had a change once. Went +to Cuba with my husband and nearly died. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 133]</span> +I don't want no change of <i>house</i>," with +deep meaning in the emphasis; "the +change that I want is another change. +Change is a great thing to have. My husband +never changed. Only his collars. +Never no other way."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You and Aunt Susan are old friends—" +suggested Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Never nothing special," broke in old +Mrs. Croft. "My goodness, I do hope +your aunt ain't calling me her friend, +because if she is, it's a thing I can't allow."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane thanked her stars that her powers +of mental concentration forbade her mind +to wander. "I'm sure if you came to us, +you'd enjoy it," she said persuasively; +"we've such a pretty bedroom down-stairs, +and I'll sleep on the dining-room sofa, so +you won't feel lonely."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Lonely. I never feel lonely. I'd thank +Heaven if I could be let alone for a little, +once in a while. I don't want to come, +and that's a fact. If that be treason, +make the most of it."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 134]</span> +"Oh, but you must come," said Jane; +"you'll like it. We want you, and you +must come."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, get me my bonnet then," said +old Mrs. Croft. "Run, Katie, I've been +sitting here waiting for it for over an hour."</p> + +<p class="indent">Katie and Jane regarded one another +in consternation. They hadn't quite +counted on this.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm going visiting," said Mrs. Croft +gaily. "Oh, my, and how I shall visit. +Years may come and years may go, and +still I shall sit there visiting away, and +when I hear the door-bell, I shall know +it's time for Christmas dinner."</p> + +<p class="indent">Katie took Jane's hand and drew her +out of the room. "I don't believe you'd +better take her," she said; "she's so flighty. +I know how to manage her, and you don't. +Just give it up."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, I won't," said Jane, smiling. "I +know that it's a kind thing to do and that +I must do it. I'm going to take her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Seems so odd you're wanting to," said +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 135]</span> +Katie. "You're very funny, I think. +People are saying that you think that +everything's for the best. Do you really +believe that?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course. We can't get outside of +God's plan, whatever we may do. If we +do wrong, we have to bear the consequences +because it's as easy to <i>see</i> the right thing +to do as the wrong, but the great Plan +never wavers."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, my," said Katie. "I'm glad to +know that."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane pressed her hand. "I'll get things +all ready, and we'll bring her over tomorrow +night," she said; "that'll be best. +Then she can go right to bed and get rested +from the effort."</p> + +<p class="indent">So it was arranged, and the Sunshine +Nurse went home to tell Susan that Mrs. +Croft had consented to come. She felt +quite positive that now they would both +attain unto a higher plane without any +difficulty, if they kept such a guest in the +house for a week.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 136]</span> +"It isn't going to be easy, Auntie," she +said, a bit later, "but it will teach you and +me a lot, and if one wants to voyage greatly, +one must get out into the deep water."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll do anything to get hold of some +different way of getting on with Matilda," +said Susan, "and I begin to see what you +mean when you say that if I change <i>me</i>, +I'll change it all. If you could make flour +into sugar, you'd have cake instead of +biscuit, but, oh, my! Old Mrs. Croft!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It won't be for so very long," said +Jane, "and think of Katie Croft through +all these years! She's been splendid, I +think."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, she didn't have any other place +to live, you know," Susan promptly reminded +her niece.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Work's work, no matter why you do it," +Jane said, "and all the big laws work +greatly. This having old Mrs. Croft is a +pretty big step for you and me to take, +and you'll see that when Aunt Matilda +returns, we'll be so strongly settled in our +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 137]</span> +new ways that she can't unsettle us. We'll +be absolutely different people."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Y—yes," said Susan, confidence fighting +doubt stoutly. "I'm willing to try, +although left to myself I should never +have thought of old Mrs. Croft as a way of +getting different."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Anything that we do with earnest +purpose is a way of getting better," said +Jane. She looked out of the window for +a minute, and her lip almost quivered. +Susan didn't notice. "Everything is always +for the best, if we're sure of it," she +then said firmly.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 138]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="IX" id="IX"></a>CHAPTER IX</h2> + +<p class="h2a">MADELEINE'S SECRET</p> + +<p class="indent">THE two girls were enjoying a pleasant +time in Susan's big, tidy kitchen.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I never knew that a kitchen could be so +perfectly lovely," said Madeleine, as they +took tea by the little table by the window. +"Jane, you are a genius! One opens the +gate here with a bubbling feeling that +everything in the whole world's all right."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm so glad," said Jane; "it's grand to +feel that one is a real channel of happiness. +I always seem to see people as made to +form that kind of connection between God +and earth, and that happiness is the visible +sign of success, a good 'getting through,' +so to speak."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you know, the English language is +awfully indefinite. That sentence might +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 139]</span> +mean good flowing like water through +people, or people so made that good can +go through them easily. Do you see?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I see. But either meaning is all +right. It isn't what I say that matters +so much, anyway. It's how you take it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I took that two ways."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, and both were good. That's so +fine,—to get two good meanings, where +I only meant one."</p> + +<p class="indent">They smiled together.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mr. Rath and I were talking about +that last evening," said Madeleine, the +color coming into her face a little. "Do +you know, he's really a very dear man. +He's awfully nice."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane jumped up to drive a wasp out of +the window. "You know him better than +I do," she said, very busy.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've known him for several years, but +never as well as here."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane came back and sat down. Madeleine +was silent, seeming to search for +words.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 140]</span> +"You were going to tell me a secret," +her friend said, after a little.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know, but I—I can't."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane lifted her eyes almost pitifully. +"Why not?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't feel that I have the right, after +all. Secrets are such precious things."</p> + +<p class="indent">"If I can help you—?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, no, no.—It isn't any trouble. +It's something quite different—I—I +thought that perhaps I could tell you my +thoughts, but—I can't."</p> + +<p class="indent">There was a silence.</p> + +<p class="indent">"There are such wonderful feelings in the +world," Madeleine went on, after a little; +"they don't seem to fit into words at all. +One feels ashamed to have even planned +to talk about them. One feels so humble +when—" she paused—then closed her +lips.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane put out her hand and took the hand +upon the other side of the little table, close. +"Don't mind me, dear; I understand."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you really?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 141]</span> +"Yes."</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine's eyes were anxious. "Do +you guess? Did you guess?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And how—what—what do you +think?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think that it would be lovely, only, of +course, I don't quite know it all, for I shall +never have anything like it."</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine started. "Oh, Jane, don't say +that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But it's so, dear."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, <i>no</i>."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, dear,—I can guess and sympathize. +But I shall never have any such happiness. +It's—it's quite settled."</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine left her seat, went round by +the side of the other girl, flung herself +down on the floor, and looked as if she were +about to cry. "Oh, Jane, you mustn't +feel so. Why shouldn't you marry?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't, dear; I've debts of my father's +to pay, and I'm pledged to my Order."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But they'll get paid after a while."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 142]</span> +"It will take all my youth."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But a way can be found?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No way can ever be. There is no one +in the wide world to help me. I'm quite +alone."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, Jane," said Madeleine, always +kneeling and always looking up, "I know +some one who can manage everything, and +you do, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane stared a little. "My aunt, do you +mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No,—God."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane smiled suddenly. "Thank you, dear. +I hadn't forgotten, but I just didn't think. +Still, I think God means me to be brave +about my burdens. I don't think that He +sees them as things from which to be +relieved."</p> + +<p class="indent">Madeleine was still looking up. "But +the channel doesn't think; the channel +just conveys what pours along it," she +whispered.</p> + +<p class="indent">Just at this second the scene altered.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, there's my aunt!" Jane exclaimed. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 143]</span> +Susan passed the window, and the next +minute she came in the door. "I've had +the most bee—youtiful afternoon," she +announced radiantly. "I did Jane lots of +credit, for I never said a word about anybody, +but oh, how splendid it was to just +be good and silent, and hear all the others +talk. They talked about everybody, and +a good many were of my own opinion, so I +had considerable satisfaction without doing +a thing wrong."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane couldn't help laughing or Madeleine, +either. "Was young Mrs. Croft there?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, and most everybody says that she'll +go off to-morrow and never come back, and +we'll have old Mrs. Croft till she dies. +They looked at me pretty hard, but I +stuck to my soul and never said a word."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It was noble in you, Auntie," Jane said +warmly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, it was," assented Susan. Then +she turned to Madeleine, who had returned +to her chair. "Jane's religion's pretty hard +on me, but I like its results, and I can do +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 144]</span> +anything I set out to do, and I don't mean +to not get a future if I can help it. You +see, my sister Matilda is a very peculiar +person. You must know that by this +time?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I have heard a good deal about her," +Madeleine admitted.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, I hope it isn't unkind in me to +say that I know more than anybody else +can possibly imagine."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But she's coming back all right," Jane +interrupted firmly; "we mustn't forget +that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No," said Susan, with a quick gasp in +her breath; "no, I'm not forgetting a +thing. I'm only talking a little. And oh, +how Mrs. Cowmull did talk about you, +Madeleine. She says Mr. Rath can't put +his nose out of the door alone."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's dreadful," said Madeleine, trying +not to color, "especially as we always +come straight here."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, I tell you it's pretty hard work +being good," said Susan, with a cheerful +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 145]</span> +sigh; "it's a relief to get home and take off +one's bonnet."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And don't you want some tea, Auntie? +It's all hot under the cozy."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I will, you Sunshine Jane, you. +I'll never cease to be grateful for good tea +again as long as I live. I've had five years +of the other kind to help me remember."</p> + +<p class="indent">Later, when Madeleine was gone, Susan +said: "Do you know, Jane, Katie Croft is +certainly going to desert that awful old +woman when we get her here? Everybody +says so."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, she isn't, Auntie; the expected is +never what happens."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane, any one with your religion can't +rely on proverbs to help them out, because +the whole thing puts you right outside of +common-sense to begin with."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was sitting looking out upon the +pretty garden. "I know, Auntie; I only +quoted that in reference to the Sewing +Society gossip. It's never the expected +that happens in their world; it's the expected +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 146]</span> +that always happens in my world. +And proverbs don't exist in my world; they're +every one of them a human limitation."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, Jane, I don't know; some of +them are very pretty, and when I've seen +Matilda over the fence and run down to +get a few scraps, I've taken considerable +comfort in 'No cloud without a silver +lining' and 'It never rains but it pours.' +They were a great help to me."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane kissed her tenderly. "Bless you, +Auntie,—everything's all right and all +lovely, and Madeleine made me so happy +to-day. I'm sure that she's engaged."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I've thought that, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, and I'm so glad for her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I hope he's good enough for her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I'm sure that he is." Jane thought +a minute. "And Madeleine gave me a big +lesson, too," she added.</p> + +<p class="indent">"What?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"She showed me that with all my teaching +and preaching, I don't trust God half +enough yet."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 147]</span> +"Well, Jane," said Susan solemnly, "I +s'pose trusting God is like being grateful +for the sunshine,—human beings ain't big +enough to hold all they ought to feel."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perhaps we'd be nothing but trust and +gratitude, then," said Jane, smiling.</p> + +<p class="indent">"They're nice feelings to be made of," +said Susan serenely, "but I must go and +put my bonnet away. But, oh, heavens, +when I think that to-morrow old Mrs. +Croft is coming!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"And that lots of good is coming with +her; she is coming to bring happiness and +happiness only."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I know," Susan's air was completely +submissive. "I can hardly wait +for her to get here. They wondered at the +Sewing Society if she'd sing Captain Jinks +all night often. She does sometimes, you +know. But I'm sure we'll like her. She's +a nice woman."</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 148]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="X" id="X"></a>CHAPTER X</h2> + +<p class="h2a">OLD MRS. CROFT</p> + +<p class="indent">OLD Mrs. Croft arrived the next afternoon +about half after four. She was +rolled up in her chair, and her small trunk +followed on a wheelbarrow.</p> + +<p class="indent">"How old you have grown!" she said +to Susan, by way of greeting, as she grated +up the gravel. "My, to think you ever +looked young!"</p> + +<p class="indent">They wheeled her into the hall. "Same +hall," she said, looking about, "same +paper you had thirty years ago. Oh, my, +to think of it. I've papered and papered +and scraped off, and papered and papered +and scraped off, and then papered again in +those same thirty years."</p> + +<p class="indent">They got her into the room on the ground +floor, which had been prepared for her. +"I suppose this was the most convenient +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 149]</span> +place to put me," she said, "and so you +put me in it. Put me where you please, +only I do hope you haven't beetles. It +makes me very nervous to hear 'em chipping +about all night, and when I'm nervous, I +don't sleep, and when I don't sleep, I just +can't help lying awake. It's a way I've +got. I caught it from my husband when +he was a baby. He'd wake up and give +it to me."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan went out with Jane to get her some +supper. "I never thought much about +Katie Croft," she said, "but I never doubted +she had a hard time."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," said Jane, "and one of the nicest +things in this world is to be able to give +some one who's had a hard time a rest."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Wouldn't it be dreadful if she died, +though, while she was here?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Who? Old Mrs. Croft?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, no, she won't ever die. I meant +Katie. Everybody says she's going to run +away, but if she don't do that and dies, +we'll be just as badly off as if she did it."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 150]</span> +"Oh, Auntie!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, Jane, we'd have to keep old Mrs. +Croft till she died."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I guess there's not much chance of +that," Jane said; "she won't die. She +has come here to do us good and to receive +good herself, that's all."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan looked appalled. "Surely you +don't expect to sunshine <i>her</i> up, do you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I do."</p> + +<p class="indent">Then Susan looked amazed. "Well, I +never did! I thought she was just here +to do us good. I—"</p> + +<p class="indent">Their conversation was suddenly interrupted +by a piercing shriek. Jane flew.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm so happy I just had to let it out," +Mrs. Croft announced. "I can't hold in +joy or sorrow. Sorrow I let out in the low +of my voice—like a cow, you know—but +joy I let rise to the skies. You'll hear +to-night."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked at her and smiled. She +looked like a story-book witch in a nice, +white, modern bed. "I thought that perhaps +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 151]</span> +you wanted something," she said, +turning to leave the room again.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, indeed, I never want anything. +I ain't by no means so bad off as is give +out."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I guessed as much. You can make a +fresh start now, and we shan't remind you +of the past."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, then I'm coming to the table," exclaimed +Mrs. Croft, "and I'm going to be +helped like a Christian and feed myself +like a human being. This being put to bed +and just all but tied there with a rope isn't +going to go on much longer, I can tell you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't speak of it at all," said Jane; +"you just do what you please here, and +we'll let you. I'm going to get you your +supper now."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Stop!" cried old Mrs. Croft sharply. +"Stop! I won't have it! I won't stand +it. Oh, I've had such a time," she went +on, bringing her clenched fist down vigorously +on her knee under the bedclothes +and raising her voice very high indeed, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 152]</span> +"such a time! I had a beautiful son that +you or any girl might have been proud to +marry, and then he must go and marry that +Katie Croft creature. There ain't many +things to cut a mother's heart to the quick +like seeing her own son marry her own +daughter-in-law. Such a nice raised boy +as he was, so neat, and she kicking her +clothes under the bed at night to tidy up +the room. Oh!" cried Mrs. Croft, lifting +her voice to a still more surprising pitch, +"what I have suffered! Nothing ain't been +spared me. I lost my son and the use of +my legs from the shock and—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Supper is all ready," Jane interrupted +sweetly and calmly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"What you got?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Sardines—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I never eat 'em."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Toast."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I hate it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Plum preserves."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Lord have mercy on me, I wouldn't +swallow one if you gave it to me."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 153]</span> +Jane stood still at the door.</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan, having heard the screams, came +running in.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Mrs. Ralston," cried Mrs. Croft, +"I had"—Jane rose, approached the bed, +and laid a firm hand on her arm. "What +do you want for supper?" she asked in a +quiet, penetrating tone.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't want nothing," cried Mrs. +Croft; "days I eat and days I don't. +This is a day I don't eat, and on such a day +I only take a little ham and eggs from time +to time. Oh, my husband, how I did love +you! It's just come over me how I loved +him, and I love him so I can't hardly stand +it—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"We'll go out and have supper ourselves, +then," said Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Eat, drink, and be merry while you can," +fairly yelled Mrs. Croft. "The handwriting +is on the wall and the Medes and Persians +is in the chicken yard right now. Oh, +what a—"</p> + +<p class="indent">They slipped out and shut the door after +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 154]</span> +them. Susan turned a scared face Jane's +way. "Why, she's crazy!" she said. +"Katie always said so, and folks thought +she was just talking. It's awful."</p> + +<p class="indent">"She's a little excited with the change," +said Jane soothingly; "she'll be calmer +soon. It's very bad to shut one's self off +from others. It's better to fuss along +with disagreeable people than to live altogether +alone. She's grown flighty through +being left alone. It's a wonder that you +didn't get odd yourself."</p> + +<p class="indent">When they went back after supper, Mrs. +Croft was sound asleep.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't wake her, for goodness' sake," +whispered Susan, in the doorway. Jane +left the room quietly, and her aunt took +her by the arm and led her up-stairs. +"This is pretty serious," she said. "I +think Katie Croft ought to have told us."</p> + +<p class="indent">"She didn't want her to come; we insisted," +said Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I tell you what," said Susan, "we were +too happy."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 155]</span> +Susan's tone was so solemn that Jane +had an odd little qualm. But the next +instant she knew that all was right, because +all is always right. "Auntie," she said, +putting her hand on the older woman's +shoulder, "you must try to realize that +you've moved out of the world where things +go wrong into the world where things go +right. When you go out of the cold, dark +winter night into a cosy, warm house, you +don't fear that the house will turn dark +and cold any minute."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But old Mrs. Croft isn't a house; she's +moved into us, instead."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane smiled her customary smile of +tranquil sweetness. "She has come to +show us ourselves," she said, "and to bring +us to some kind of better things. I know +it."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's eyes altered to confidence. +"Well, Sunshine Jane," she said, "I'll try +to believe that you know. I'll try."</p> + +<p class="indent">They went to bed early, and Jane slept +on the dining-room sofa. In the night +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 156]</span> +Mrs. Croft, calling, woke her. She jumped +up and went to her at once.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm hungry. You didn't ask me here +to starve me, did you? Oh, how hungry +I am. I've never been so hungry before."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll get you anything you like," the girl +said. "What shall it be?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Mrs. Croft shook her head lugubriously. +"Whatever I eat is sure to kill me. I wish +I was home. You don't know how good +dear Katie is to me, Miss Grey. Nobody +could, unless they lived with her year in +and year out as I do. Something told me +never to leave my sweet child, and I disobeyed +my conscience which won't let me +sleep for aching like a serpent's tooth. Oh, +my little Katie, my pretty little Katie, my +loving little Katie that I went and left at +home! Take me to her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But she isn't at home," said Jane. +"She's gone away on a little visit. She +went last evening."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I shall never see her again," said Mrs. +Croft mournfully. "I shall never see no +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 157]</span> +one again. Oh, dear; oh, dear. My eyes. +My eyes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What shall I get you? A glass of +milk?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It doesn't matter. Whatever you like. +I was never one to make trouble. Whatever +you like."</p> + +<p class="indent">When Jane returned with the milk and +some hastily prepared bread and butter, +Mrs. Croft was praying rapidly. "I think +I've got religion," said she, in a bright, +chatty tone; "if you'll sit down, I'll convert +you. It's never too late to mend, +and so get your darning basket and come +right here." She began to eat and drink +very rapidly. "It's going to kill me," she +said, between bites, "but I don't care a +mite. What is life after all,—a vain +fleeting shadow of vanity,—why, you +ain't put no jam on this bread!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you like jam? I'll get you some at +once."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, merciful heavens, waking me up +in the dead of night to give me plain bread +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 158]</span> +and no jam! I shall never see Katie again, +and perhaps it's just as well, for she'd not +stand such doings. Oh, you idle, thriftless +girl, take me home, take me home at once."</p> + +<p class="indent">"In the morning," said Jane gently.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, my,—why did I ever come! +Katie, my Katie, my long-loving Katie; +my dear little Katie that's gone to New +York!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Then, having swallowed the milk in +great gulps and the bread in great bites, +she shut her eyes and lay back again in bed.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Shan't I bring you anything else?" +Jane asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No," said the invalid, "not by no means, +and I'll trouble you to get out and keep +out and don't make a noise in the morning, +for I want my last hours to be peaceful, +and I'm going to take a screw-driver and +fix my thoughts firmly to heaven at once."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane went softly out.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 159]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XI" id="XI"></a>CHAPTER XI</h2> + +<p class="h2a">SHE SLEEPS</p> + +<p class="indent">THE next morning Susan felt perturbed. +"She'll take up a whole week of our +happy visit, and I can't bear to lose a +minute. The time's going too fast, anyhow."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo Rath came in shortly after. +He and Madeleine and Emily Mead were +in and out daily to suit themselves by this +time. "Do you know, Mrs. Croft has +gone off, nobody knows where," he said +gravely; "she's left no address, and people +say she'll never come back."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan threw up her hands with a wail. +"Oh, Jane, she <i>has</i> left that dreadful old +woman on us for life; I'll just bet anything +folks knew exactly that she meant to do it +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 160]</span> +when they talked to me so. What <i>will</i> +Matilda say when she comes back?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was silent a minute. "It's no use +doubting what one really believes," she +said finally. "I do really believe that I +came here for a good purpose, and I know +that I had a good purpose in inviting Mrs. +Croft. I'm taught that to doubt is like +pouring ink into the pure water of one's +good intentions, and I won't doubt. I +refuse to."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But if you go back to where you come +from and leave me with Matilda and old +Mrs. Croft, I'll be dead or I'll wish I was +dead,—it all comes to the same thing," +cried poor Susan.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Auntie," said Jane firmly, "I shan't +leave you alone with Aunt Matilda and +Mrs. Croft, you needn't fear."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh," said Susan, her face undergoing a +lightning transformation, "if you'll stay +here, I'll keep Mrs. Croft or anybody else, +with pleasure."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What, even me?" laughed Lorenzo.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 161]</span> +"I'd like to keep you," said Susan +warmly. "I think you're one of the nicest +young men I ever knew."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'd like to stay," said Lorenzo, looking +at Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">She lifted up her eyes and they had a +peculiar expression.</p> + +<p class="indent">Just then Emily Mead came in. "Only +think," she said, directly greetings were +over, "people say Mrs. Croft drew all +their money out of the bank before she left. +Everybody says she's deserted her mother-in-law +completely."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane, it really is so," said Susan; "she +really is gone."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked steadily into their three +faces. "If I begin worrying and doubting, +of course there'll be a chance to worry and +trouble, because I'm the strongest of you +all," she said gravely, "but I won't go +down and live in the world of worry and +trouble under any circumstances. I know +that only good can come of Mrs. Croft's +being here. I <i>know</i> it!"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 162]</span> +"I wish that I could learn how you +manage such faith," said the young artist. +"I'd try it on myself,—yes, I would, for +a fact."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's not so easy," said Jane, looking +earnestly at him. "It means just the +same mental discipline that physical culture +means for the muscles. It takes +time."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I'd like to learn," said Lorenzo.</p> + +<p class="indent">"So would I!" said Emily Mead.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've begun already," said Susan; +"every time I think of old Mrs. Croft I +say: 'She's here for some good purpose, +God help us.'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Tell me," said Emily Mead, "what +possessed you to have her, anyway? +Everybody's wondering."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane thought that it would be a nice +thing to do. And so we did it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you always do things if you think +of them?" Emily asked Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm taught that I must."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Taught?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 163]</span> +"It's part of my sunshine work."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's why she's here," interposed +Susan; "she thought of me and came right +along."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily looked thoughtful. "I wonder if +I could learn," she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Anybody can learn anything," said +Lorenzo.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Wouldn't it be nice to all learn Jane's +religion?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've got it most learned," said Susan, +"I'm to where I'm most ready to stand +Matilda, if only we don't have to keep old +Mrs. Croft."</p> + +<p class="indent">"What is old Mrs. Croft doing now?" +Emily asked suddenly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"She's still asleep. She says that she +sleeps late."</p> + +<p class="indent">Then Emily rose to go. Lorenzo Rath +rose and left with her.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane," said Susan solemnly, after they +were alone, "I'm afraid that religion of +yours ain't as practical as it might be, after +all. It's got us old Mrs. Croft, and I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 164]</span> +ain't saying a word, but now I'm about +positive it's going to lose you that young +man. You could have him if you'd just +exert yourself a little, and you don't at +all."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I couldn't have him, Auntie."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, you could. Don't tell me. I +know a young man when I see one, and Mr. +Rath's a real young man. He loves you, +Jane, just because nobody could help it, +and if you weren't always so busy, he'd +get on a good deal faster."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't marry, Aunt Susan." Jane, +with Madeleine's secret high in her heart, +was very busy setting the kitchen to rights. +"Some people are not meant to have homes +of their own. It's the century."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Fiddle for the century," said Susan, +with something almost like violence. "I'm +awful tired of all this hash and talk about +the century. About the only thing I've +had to think of since Matilda made up her +mind I was too sick to get up, was what I +read in newspapers about the troubles of +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 165]</span> +the century. Centuries is always in hot +water till they're well over, and then they +get to be called the good old days. I guess +days ain't so different nor centuries either +nor women neither. Fiddle for all this +kind of rubbish,—it's no use except to +upset a nice girl like you and keep her from +marrying a nice young fellow like Mr. Rath. +Girls don't know nothing about love no +more. Mercy on us, why, it's a kind of +thing that makes you willing to go right +out and hack down trees for the man."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked a little smiling and a little +wistful. "I'll tell you what it is, Auntie," +she said; "when my father died he left a +debt that ought to be paid, and I promised +him I'd pay it. I couldn't marry—it +wouldn't be honest."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's eyes flew pitifully open. "Good +heavens, mercy on us, no; then you never +can't marry, sure and certain. There never +was the man yet so good he wouldn't throw +a thing like that in a woman's teeth. It's +a man's way, my dear, and a wife ought not +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 166]</span> +to mind, but one of the difficulties of being +a wife is that you always do mind."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know that I should mind," said Jane +quietly, "and, anyway, I don't want to +marry. I'm much happier going about on +my sunbeam mission, trying to help others +a bit here and a bit there." She smiled +bravely as she spoke, for all that it takes a +deal of training in truth not to waver or +quaver in such a minute. She had to think +steadily along the lines which she had +worked so hard to build into every brain-cell +and spirit-fiber of her make-up. +"Auntie," she went on then, after a brief +reflection that he who works in truth's wool +works without fear as to the breaking of +one single thread, "you and I are trying +dreadfully hard—trying with all our might +to do exactly right. We're trying to break +your chains by the only way in which +material chains can be broken,—by breaking +those of others. We can't go astray. +If old Mrs. Croft should stay here till she +died, and if I should work till I died at +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 167]</span> +paying the debts of others, she'd stay for +some good purpose, and I'd be working in +the same way. Be very sure of that."</p> + +<p class="indent">For a second Susan looked cheered—but +only for a second. Then, "That's all very +well for you and me, who want to be uplifted—at +least you want to be, and I +think maybe I'll like it after I get a little +used to it. But Matilda doesn't know or +care anything about planes, and it's Matilda +I keep thinking of." There was another +pause, and then she added: "And it's +Matilda I'll have to live with,—along +with old Mrs. Croft. Oh, Jane, I'd be so +much happier if you'd marry Mr. Rath and +let me come and live with you!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane went and put her arms about her. +"Auntie, it isn't easy to learn my way of +looking at things, because you have to keep +at them till they're so firm in you that +nothing from outside can ever shake or uproot +them. But what I believe is just so +firm with me, and I won't give anything up,—not +even about Mrs. Croft. We're all +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 168]</span> +right and she's all right and everything's +all right, and I don't need to marry any +one."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan winked mournfully. "If there +was only some way to meet Matilda on her +way home and kind of get that through her +head before she saw Mrs. Croft. You see, +she always shuts that room up cold winters +and keeps cold meat in there. I've had +many a good meal out of that room."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You must not cast about for ways and +means," said Jane firmly. "Life is like a +sunshiny warm day, and our part is to +breathe and feel and thank God,—not to +look for the sun to surely cease shining."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But it does stop," wailed Susan, "often."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, thank Heaven," said Jane, "if it +didn't, we'd be burnt up alive by our own +vitality."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, dear," said Susan briefly, "you've +an answer for everything. Well, let's get +dinner."</p> + +<p class="indent">They went into the kitchen.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 169]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XII" id="XII"></a>CHAPTER XII</h2> + +<p class="h2a">EMILY'S PROJECT</p> + +<p class="indent">AFTER dinner that day Emily Mead +came with her work. Emily Mead +was one of those nondescript girls who seem +to spring up more and more thickly in these +troublous, churned-up times of ours.</p> + +<p class="indent">Too pretty to be plain, too unattractive +to be beautiful. Too well-to-do to need +to work, too poor to attain to anything for +which she longed. Too clever to belong to +her class, not clever enough to rise above it. +Altogether a very fit subject for Jane to +"sunshine," as her aunt put it.</p> + +<p class="indent">"How do you get along with old Mrs. +Croft?" she asked, directly she was seated.</p> + +<p class="indent">"She's asleep yet," Jane said; "she +was so restless all night."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 170]</span> +"She always sleeps days and is awake all +night; didn't you know that before?" +queried Emily, in surprise. "Some one +ought to have told you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It doesn't matter," said Jane serenely. +There was never any bravado in her serenity; +it was quite sincere.</p> + +<p class="indent">"That was what made Katie so mad," +Emily continued. "She said it gave her +her days, to be sure, but, as she couldn't +very well sleep, too, all day, she never really +had any time herself."</p> + +<p class="indent">"We'll get along all right," said Jane +quietly; "old people have ways, and then +they change and have other ways, and the +rest must expect to be considerate."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mercy on us, I wonder what she'll +change to next," said Susan, with feeling. +She had just returned from listening at the +invalid's door.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't worry, Auntie,—just remember!" +Jane's smile was at once bright +and also a bit admonitory.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm trying to believe that everything's +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 171]</span> +all right always, too," said Susan to Emily, +"but, oh, my!"</p> + +<p class="indent">They went out on the shady side of the +house to where a little table stood, which +was made out of a board nailed into a cut-off +tree stump. Jane and Emily carried +chairs, and Susan brought her darning +basket. It was delightfully pleasant. +From time to time Jane or her aunt slipped +in and listened at the door, but old Mrs. +Croft slept on like a baby.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I do wonder if Katie Croft has really +gone for good!" Emily said to Susan, while +Jane was absent on one of these errands.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't trust myself even with my own +opinions," said Susan reservedly; "I haven't +much time to get changed before Matilda +comes, you know, and I want to believe in +Jane's religion if I can. It's so kind of +warm and comforting. I like it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane," Emily said, turning towards her +when she returned, "I've come to-day on an +awfully serious errand, and I want you to +help me."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 172]</span> +"I will certainly, if I can. What is it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you really believe that wanting +anything shows that one is going to get it? +You said something like that the other day."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know that one can get anything one +wants," Jane answered gravely; "of course +the responsibility of some kinds of wanting +is awfully heavy. But the law doesn't +alter."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Can you explain it to me?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, that's it," said Susan, "you tell +us how to manage. I want to get something +myself. Or I mean it's that I want something +I've got to go away again. Or I +guess I'd better not try to say what I +mean."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you won't either of you understand +what I mean, when I tell you," said Jane. +"It's just as I said before, it takes a lot of +study to get your brain-cells to where they +can hold an idea that's really new to you. +Heads are like empty beehives,—you have +to have the comb before you can have the +honey, and every different kind of study +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 173]</span> +requires a different kind of cells just for +its use alone. When things don't interest +us, it's because the brain-cells in regard to +that subject have never been developed. +That's all. That's what they taught +me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think it's interesting," said Susan. +"I always thought that the inside of my +head was one thing that I didn't need to +bother about. Seems it isn't, after all. +Go on, you Sunshine Jane, you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm like your aunt. I thought that +what I thought was the last thing that +mattered," said Emily.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Everything matters. There's nothing +in this world that doesn't matter, because +this world is all matter. Anything that +doesn't matter must be spirit. Don't you +see that when you say and really mean that +a thing doesn't matter, you mean that to +you it isn't material,—that it's no part of +your world?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear me, I never thought of that," said +Susan, "then I suppose as long as things do +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 174]</span> +matter to us, it means we just hang on +to them and hold them for all we're +worth."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But, Jane, thoughts can't matter much? +Or we can forget things."</p> + +<p class="indent">"There isn't anything that we can think +of at all that we are ever free not to think +about again—that is, if it's a good +thought," said Jane. "If a thought comes +to us at all, it comes with some responsibility +attached. Either we are meant to gain +strength by dismissing it, if it seems wrong, +or it's our duty to do something with it, if +it's right. Most people's minds are all +littered up with thoughts that they never +either use or put away. That's what makes +them so stupid."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Goodness!" exclaimed Susan. "Why, +I never put a thought away in my life,—not +as I know of."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've never thought anything at all about +my thoughts," said Emily, looking rather +startled.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 175]</span> +"Lots of people don't," said Jane; "they +act just as a woman would in making a +dress, if she cut it out a bit now and a bit +then without ever laying the pattern back +even, and then joined it anywhere any time, +and then was surprised when it didn't even +prove fit to wear—not to speak of looking +all witched."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Is that what ails some lives?" Emily +asked, looking yet more startled.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's what ails almost every life. It's +what makes 'I didn't think' the worst confession +in the world. A man driving a +motor with his eyes shut wouldn't be a bit +worse. Life's a great powerful force always +rushing on, and we swing into the tide and +never bother to row or to steer or to see that +our boat is water-tight."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You make me feel awful, Jane. As if +I'd been lazy, staying in bed so. And it +was the only way."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You couldn't do any better, Auntie. +At least you weren't doing anything wrong. +Being moored in a little, quiet cove is better +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 176]</span> +than being adrift and slamming into the +boats of others."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'd really have had to think more about +Matilda's thoughts than my own, if I'd +known. I'd never have had time for much +thinking as I pleased in the way you say; I +was always jumping up and flopping down."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane," said Emily earnestly, "then +every thought matters?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, or matterates." Jane smiled. "If +a thought doesn't produce good, it'll surely +produce bad,—it's got to do something. +You plant your thoughts in time just as one +plants seed in the ground, and any further +thoughts of the same kind add to its strength +until enough strength causes an appearance +in this world."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You really believe that?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know it. I know it so well that I +think that every seed that's ever fallen was +a lesson that we were too stupid to learn. +Every time a seed fell and germinated, God +said: 'There, that's the very plainest teaching +on earth. Can't you see?' Sometimes +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 177]</span> +I think the world's all a book for us +to learn heaven in, just as our bodies explain +our souls to us."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan looked at Emily in an awed way. +"I guess I can get to believe it all," she +said, in a low tone; "it sounds so plain +when you stop and think of it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll try to believe it," said Emily, "but +what I care most about is to learn how to +get what you want?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane considered. "That comes ever so +far along. You have to learn to get what +you want out of yourself before you can be +upon the plane where you naturally get +what you want, because you are too far on +to want what you couldn't get."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily didn't understand and didn't care. +"Do tell me how it's done, anyway," she +begged eagerly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't know whether what I say will +have any meaning for you, but I'll say it, +anyway. You'll have to know that it's +what I believe and live by, and if you're to +believe it and live by it, it will come to you +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 178]</span> +quite easily, and if not it's because it isn't +for you yet."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I mean to believe," said Emily firmly. +"I want something, and I'll do anything to +get it."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane shook her head. "That's the very +hardest road to come by," she said, "unless +it's some overcoming in yourself that you +are wanting. You see, the very first step +has to be the conquering of ourselves, not +the asking for material things. You have +to open a channel for the spirit, and then +the material flows through afterwards, as a +matter of course. But if you've gone on a +good ways, you don't think of getting <i>things</i> +at all; you just want opportunities to grow, +and you know that what you need for life +will keep coming."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But it doesn't with lots of people," said +Emily. "Just look at the poor—and the +suffering."</p> + +<p class="indent">"They aren't living according to this +law," said Jane. "They're living on +another plane. There are different planes."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 179]</span> +"Don't you see," interposed Susan, "we +asked Mrs. Croft because it would get me +on a plane where, when Matilda came back, +she wouldn't mind so many changes."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily looked inquiring. "A different +plane?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," said Jane, "you can lift yourself +straight out of any circle of conditions by +suddenly altering all your own ideas—if +you've strength to do so."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'd never have asked Mrs. Croft alone +by myself, you know," said Susan; "nobody +that looked at things the way other +folks do, would. But Jane looks at everything +different from everybody else. She +said it would be a quick way of being different. +I guess she's right."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I never heard any ideas like that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But they aren't new," said Jane; +"they're older than the hills. God made +the world and then gave every man dominion +over his world. We all have the whole +of <i>our</i> world to rule. This way of looking +at things is new to you, but there are +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 180]</span> +thousands and thousands of people proving +it true every day. All the old religions +teach it, and all the new religions bid you +live it or they won't be for you. They +don't kill men for not believing now. They +just let them live and suffer and go blundering +on. Why"—Jane grew suddenly pink +with fervor—"why, everywhere I look, almost, +I see just lovely chances being let die, +because people won't fuss to tend them. +People are too careless and too thoughtless. +The truth is so plain that the very word +'thoughtless' fairly screams what's the matter +to every one, but hardly any one bothers."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But the people who believe as you do,—do +they all get everything that they +want?" asked Emily.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Or else they want what they get," said +Jane; "it comes to exactly the same thing +when you begin to understand. The beauty +of every step nearer God is the new learning +of how exactly right his world is managed. +All my old puzzles have been cleared up, +and it's so wonderful. Why, I used to +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 181]</span> +think that when beautiful, dear little children +died it was awful; but now I know +that they came to help and teach others, +and that when they'd spread their lesson to +those others, they didn't need lessons themselves +and just left the school and went +back into the beautiful world of Better +Things. It was such a help to me to know +why splendid men and women who were +needed went so suddenly sometimes; it's +because they're needed much more elsewhere +and respond to that call of duty at +once. I don't think of death as anything +dreadful now; I think of it as a door that +will open and close very easily for me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's one door that Matilda liked to keep +setting open," said Susan,—"oh, dear me, +Jane, I'm trying to grow brain-cells and be +a credit to you, and I can't think of anything +but old Mrs. Croft. Perhaps she's +woke up."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane rose and went into the house.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you think you can take it all in?" +Emily asked, slowly and thoughtfully.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 182]</span> +"I'm doing my best," said Susan, "she's +so happy and so good I think she must know +what she's talking about."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane came back. "She's still sleeping," +she said; "don't you worry, dear Auntie."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't help it," said Susan. "I've +dodged about for so long and played things +were so that weren't so, that I guess I'm +pretty much out of tune, and it'll be a little +while before I can stop worrying."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, you aren't out of tune," said Jane, +smiling at her affectionately, "or if you are, +just say you're in tune and you will be, +right off."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you believe that?" Emily asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, of course. I know it absolutely +for myself, and I know that it's equally true +for others if they have the strength to +declare it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But how?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"How! Why, because every declaration +of good is spiritual, and proves that you +are one with your soul and master over your +body, just as false declarations make you +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 183]</span> +one with your body and take away all power +from your soul. That's how mental cures +work. When anybody says 'I am well,' +she declares souls can't be ill, and she makes +Truth stronger by adding her strength to its +strength. But when a man says 'I am ill,' +he declares a lie, for souls can't be ill, and +so he's claiming not to be spiritual, but just +to be his own body. It's as if a weaver +stopped weaving and said: 'I've broken +several threads, and <i>I'm</i> going to be imperfect, +and <i>I</i> won't bring any price, and +<i>I'll</i> only be fit to cut up into cleaning +cloths.' What would you think of him? +You'd say: 'Why, that's only an hour's work +in cloth and can be put aside without further +thought. Just go right on and with your +skill and judgment make the next piece +perfect. It was never any of it <i>you</i>; it +was the stuff you were making.' Bodies +are the stuff we are making."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily laid down her work. "Jane, that's +wonderful," she said solemnly. "You put +that so that I really got hold of it. I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 184]</span> +understand exactly what you mean, and if +only everybody else did!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"But nobody else really matters to you," +said Jane; "all that matters to you is that +you believe. They have their lives—you +have yours."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily was looking very earnest. "I'm +going to try," she said, rising. "I'm going +to try. I must go now, but I'm going +home to go to work in my world."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane walked with her to the gate. "I'll +help you all I can," she said, "I'm so glad +you're interested. It makes life so splendid."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily stopped and took her hand.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane," she said, "I want to tell you +something. I want to marry Mr. Rath. +I think he's the nicest man I ever saw. +Do you really—really—believe that I +can, if I learn to think as you do?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane turned white beneath the other's +eyes. "Why, but don't you know—don't +you <i>see</i> that he's in love?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"In love! With you?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 185]</span> +"With me,—oh, <i>no</i>. With Madeleine."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, no, he's not in love with her," said +Emily decidedly; "I know that. I know +that perfectly well."</p> + +<p class="indent">"They knew one another before they +came here, you know."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, I see them round town together +all hours," said Emily; "they're like +brother and sister, they're not one bit in +love. I thought that perhaps it was you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, dear, no—I can't marry. I never +even think of it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't you use any of your ideas with +him?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, indeed! I never ask anything for +myself any more. I just ask to manifest +God's will,—to help in any of His work +that offers."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You're awfully good, dear. But, honestly, +do you think that I could surely get +him if I tried?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, the law is certain, but"—Jane +spoke gently—"you're so far from +understanding it yet. I only told you a little. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 186]</span> +It takes ever so long to get one's mind built +to where it will grasp an ideal and hold it +without wavering once. There's such a lot +I didn't tell you; I couldn't in those few +minutes. I just showed you the picture, +and you have to work hard till you learn +how to paint it. You see, a wish is like +blowing a bubble, and if you add wishes +and more wishes, you gradually change the +bubble into a solid mold, which is a real +thing of spirit but empty of material; then, +if you keep it solid and firm, the fact of it +is real spiritually, and a vacuum as to matter +makes the matter just <i>have</i> to fill it, and it is +that filling into the mold shaped by our +thoughts that makes what we see and live +here in this world. The world is all matter +circulating in thought-molds. Anything +that you carefully and steadily and consistently +think out must become manifest. +God manifesting His will means that. We +are His will. And the nearer we approximate +to the highest in Him, the more we +can manifest ourselves. That's why very +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 187]</span> +good people are seldom rich; they want to +manifest in deeds and not in things. That's +why they never keep money—it only represents +to them the need of others. If you +really and truly love Mr. Rath, and feel it +steadily and steadfastly your mission to +make him very happy, of course it will be, +even though he loved some one else. But to +want a man who loved some one else +wouldn't be possible to any one who believed +in this teaching. That's where it is, +you see. When you get power, you never +want to do evil with it. Power from God +never manifests in evil. When you are +where you can get whatever you want, it +simply means that you are living where only +good can come, and where you are able to +see it coming."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily stood perfectly still, looking downwards. +Then suddenly she burst into +violent sobs. "Oh, I feel so small, so mean—so +wicked. It isn't as you feel a bit with +me. I just want to get out of this stupid +town—and he's so good-looking!"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 188]</span> +Jane's eyelids fell.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I feel so mean and petty," Emily went +on, pressing her hands over her face. "I +could never be good like you. I can't +understand. I just want to be married. +I'm so tired of my life."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well," said Jane, with steady firmness, +"why don't you go to him and talk it all +over nicely? As you would with Madeleine +or me. Perhaps that would be best."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you really think so?" said Emily, +lifting her eyes; "do you believe that a +girl can go to a man and be honest with +him, just as a man can with a woman?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I couldn't," said Jane, "because I +wouldn't want to, but if you want to do it, +I don't see why you can't."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But why wouldn't you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Because I get my things that other way,—simply +by asking God to guide me towards +His will and guide me from mistake."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Did you do that about asking old Mrs. +Croft?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 189]</span> +"Certainly. I do it about everything. +I live by that rule now. I've absolute faith +in God's guidance."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily looked at her. "It must be beautiful," +she said, "and you really think that +it would be all right for me to go and talk +to him, do you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," said Jane slowly. "I think that +it would be best all round."</p> + +<p class="indent">"After all, this is the woman's century," +said Emily, with a sudden energy quite unlike +her previous interest. "I don't know +why I shouldn't."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think that the best way to handle all +our problems is to let them flow naturally +to their finish," said Jane; "dammed or +choked rivers always make trouble."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I should like to say just what I felt to a +man just once," said Emily thoughtfully. +"It would do me a world of good."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Then say it," said Jane. "Only are +you really sure that he's not in love with +Madeleine?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I'm positive as to that."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 190]</span> +"Then go ahead."</p> + +<p class="indent">They parted, and Jane returned to the +house. She was not so entirely spiritual +that she could repress a very human kind of +smile over Emily's project.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 191]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XIII" id="XIII"></a>CHAPTER XIII</h2> + +<p class="h2a">EMILY IS HERSELF FREELY</p> + +<p class="indent">AS Emily turned from Mrs. Ralston's +gate, she felt more buoyant happiness +than anything in life had ever hitherto +brought her. She felt licensed on high +authority to revel in the hitherto forbidden. +She wanted Lorenzo Rath, and she thought +that she understood how to get him. We +may follow her thought and then we will +follow where it led her, for in all the surge +of the new teaching there is no lesson greater +to learn than this which Emily had failed +to grasp,—that the possession of tools does +not make one a carver; that all things +spiritual must be learned exactly as all +things material. One may have so lived +previously that the learning is a mere showing +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 192]</span> +how, but without experience nothing, +either spiritual, mental, or physical, can be +efficaciously handled. When people declare +that something is not true because +they tried it and it failed to work, remember +Emily Mead. Emily had acquired just +one idea out of Jane's exposition: "That +you could get anything that you want." +It is the idea that hosts of people find most +attractive in this world, quite irrespective +of its correlative esotericism,—that the +soul growing towards infinite power learns +every upward step by resolutely liking what +it gets. No man can climb a stair by hacking +down every step passed; he climbs by +being so firm upon each step that he can +poise his whole weight thereon as he mounts. +It is part of the supremely beautiful logic +of the highest teaching that the same effort +which Jesus made—every great teacher +has made—is sure to make, too. We +must see the Divine embodied in the +Present and the Weak and the Humble, +before in our own spirit we may deal, for +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 193]</span> +the good of all, with the Future and +Strength and Power. When one seizes +upon anything God-given as a means of acquiring +earth-gifts, one has but seized the +empty air; the idea and then ideal have +never been in the possession of such an one. +There is nothing shut away from those who +really make God's teaching a vital part of +themselves, but such men and women are +no longer keen to selfishly possess, and the +good which they reach out for flows easily +in for their further distribution; in other +words, they become what we were all designed +to be,—the outward manifestations +of God's purpose, the living breathing, +blessed servants of His will.</p> + +<p class="indent">How far this interpretation lay from poor +Emily's comprehension the reader knows.</p> + +<p class="indent">She hurried along, her whole being bounding +with joy over the simplicity of the new +lesson. It all seemed almost too story-book-like +to be happening in her stupid, +commonplace life. She had spent so many +long hours in thinking over how things +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 194]</span> +would never happen for her, that she had +entirely lost faith in their ever changing +their ways and now, all of a sudden, here +was a complete reversal. Bonds were +turned into wings; that unattainable being, +a live man, was not only at hand, but available; +she felt herself bidden not to doubt +her power; she judged herself advised to +say frankly all the things that girls may +never say. This was the day of feminine +freedom. To wish was to have. What +one wanted was the thing that was best for +one. Emily—with all of Jane's ideas +swimming upside down in her head—felt +superbly joyous and confident. After all, +being alive was a pretty good thing.</p> + +<p class="indent">She turned a corner into the lane that led +in a roundabout way to her mother's back +garden gate and walked swiftly. She was +a fine, straight girl with a lithe, springy walk. +Perhaps Lorenzo Rath could not have done +better, from most standpoints, than to +marry such an one. Many men do worse. +And there was old Mr. Cattermole's money, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 195]</span> +too. Some of these views float in all human +atmosphere to-day—float there securely, +because the world is a practical world, and +an automobile is obvious, while love and +trust are absolutely unknown to many. +"Ye cannot serve God and Mammon too," +and Mammon is very plain and practical, +rolling on rubber tires to the best restaurant. +Emily could not have reduced her +roseate visions to any such sordid reasoning, +but love to her meant leaving town and +having a good-looking and lively young man +to take her about. This was not really +love, any more than the means by which +she expected to acquire it were the religion +taught by Jane. We hear much of the +downfall of love and the downfall of religion +in these days, but no one even stops to +realize that religion and love cannot possibly +even shake on their thrones. Their counterfeits +may crumble and tumble, but real +truth can never fail. It was the counterfeits +at which Emily, like many another, +grasped eagerly.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 196]</span> +So now she was tripping lightly along and, +turning the twist by the great chestnut tree, +her heart gave a sudden flop, for just ahead +she saw her quarry. He was propped +against the fence, using his knees for an +easel, while he made a rapid water-color +sketch. He was good at those little impressions +of an artistic bit, that nearly +always show forth in youth a great artist +struggling to grow.</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily started, for she was very close to +him before she saw him, and her rampant +thoughts led her to blush, apologize, and +stammer precisely as she might have done, +had her sex never advanced at all but merely +remained the dominant note that they have +always been.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, Mr. Rath," and then she paused.</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo—who wanted to finish his +sketch—nodded pleasantly without looking +up. "Grand day for walking," he said, +as a supremely polite hint, and continued to +work rapidly.</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily went close beside him and looked +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 197]</span> +downward upon the canvas. "How pretty! +I wish I knew more about pictures. What +is that brown hill? You can't see a hill +from here."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's a cow," said Lorenzo, painting +very fast indeed, "but don't ask me to +explain things, for I can't work and talk at +the same time."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily sank down beside him with a +pleasant sense of proprietorship now that +she could get him by will power alone. +"I've just come from Mrs. Ralston's. +They're in such distress over old Mrs. +Croft."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Is she worse?" The artist forgot to +paint all of a sudden, and turned quickly +towards her.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, no,—she was asleep when I left. +Jane didn't seem a bit troubled, but Mrs. +Ralston is almost wild over not knowing +what to say to her sister when she comes +back and finds that awful old woman there. +It's a terrible situation. Everybody knows +that young Mrs. Croft has run away. She +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 198]</span> +just hated to stay and now she's gone. +Isn't it awful?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I don't know," said Lorenzo, +suddenly regaining his deep interest in work, +"I have a distinct feeling that Miss Grey +will bring things out all right for most +people always. It's her way."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, she's a dear girl," said Emily, and +paused to have time to consider things a +little while, feeling that the conversation +should be continued by the man. The man +didn't continue the conversation, however, +merely wielding his brush and looking completely +absorbed.</p> + +<p class="indent">Then she remembered her mission. "Mr. +Rath, do you believe in frankness always?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wish that I did."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But don't you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Civilization wouldn't stand for it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perhaps not every one could bear it, +but some could. I could, I'm sure."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Are you so sure?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I am sure. I was talking with +Jane alone just at the gate before I left, and +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 199]</span> +she believes that frankness is best always."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's easiest, certainly." Lorenzo raised +his eyebrows a little impatiently, but she +paid no attention.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you think so?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, of course. When one wants to be +let alone and blurts out, 'Let me alone,' +why, one gets let alone."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, but that would be impolite," said +Emily, feeling that for an artist he used very +crude metaphor. "Of course, Jane and I +were not talking about that kind of people, +or that kind of ways. We were talking of +people like you and me—nice people, you +know. Jane advised me to be quite frank +with you."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo opened his eyes widely. "About +what, please?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, about all things. You see I meet so +few men, and men are so interesting, and I +enjoy talking with them. I've read a good +deal, and I don't care for the life in this +place. I want to leave it dreadfully."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 200]</span> +"So do I," said the artist. "I quite agree +with you there."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You see, Jane has been teaching me to +understand life, and I am getting the feeling +that I am meant for something else than +just helping my mother, wandering about +town, and going to church. I'm very tired +and restless."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo painted fast.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mr. Rath, if you—a man—felt as I +do, what would you do?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Get out."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But where?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Everybody can find a way, if they really +want to."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It isn't as if I had talent, you see."</p> + +<p class="indent">"A good many people haven't talent +and yet do very well, indeed."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I don't want to be a shop-girl or +anything like that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Naturally not."</p> + +<p class="indent">There was a pause.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm very much interested in the progress +women are making," said Emily. "I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 201]</span> +read all I can get hold of about it. Don't +you think it remarkable?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't think much about it, and I skip +everything on the subject."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Mr. Rath!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm a jealous brute. I don't like to +realize that a woman can do everything +that is a man's work, even to the verge of +driving him to starvation, while he can't +do any of her work under any circumstances."</p> + +<p class="indent">"He could wash and cook and sweep."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, he's invented machines to save her +that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I see you've no sympathy with the advanced +woman."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I have. I'm very sorry for her. +A nice mess the next generation will be."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, dear."</p> + +<p class="indent">"My one comfort is that boys take after +their mothers, and I'm looking to see a +future generation of men so strong-minded +that they smash ladies back to where they +belong—in the rear with the tents."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 202]</span> +"Goodness, Mr. Rath, then you don't +like any of the ways things are going?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course I don't. Once upon a time +a busy man's time was sacred; now any +woman who feels like taking it, appropriates +it mercilessly."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I should lock the door, if I felt that way. +But now really, don't you think that we +might speak quite openly and frankly?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo began to put up his paints.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I want to get to the bottom of a lot of +things."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"You're the first man that I've ever +known that I felt could understand what I +meant, and I do want to know the man's +side of things."</p> + +<p class="indent">"A man hasn't got any side nowadays. +He's not allowed one."</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily looked a little surprised. "You +speak bitterly."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think I've a right. Men are still +observing the rules of the game and suffering +bitter consequences."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 203]</span> +"What do you mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Women with homes have gone into the +world to earn some extra pocket money +until they've knocked the bottom out of +all wage systems, and you never can make +the wildest among them see that women +can't expect men's pay unless they do men's +work. A man's work is only half of it in +business, the other half is supporting a +family. Women want equal pay and to +spend the result as they please. The +man's wages go usually on bread and the +woman's on bonnets, to speak broadly. +He goes to his own home at night and has +every single bill for four to ten people. +She goes to somebody else's house and has +only her own needs to face, with perhaps +some contribution towards those off somewhere."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear me," said Emily, "I never thought +of that."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No," said Lorenzo, snapping the lid +of his color box shut, "women don't think +of that. But men do."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 204]</span> +"But surely there are loads and loads of +women who do support families."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, and who are dragged down by the +injustice of what economists call 'The Law +of Supplemented Earnings'!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Emily felt that the experience of conversing +frankly with a live man was not exactly +what she had anticipated. It certainly +was in no way romantic. She felt baffled +and a good deal chilled. The conversation +had taken a horrid twist away from what +she had intended.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You think that women have no right +to go out in the world then?" she said. +"You don't sympathize with the modern +trend?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I sympathize with nature and human +nature," said Lorenzo, "but not with +civilization." He rose to his feet.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Mr. Rath!" she looked upward, +expecting to be assisted to rise.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I believe in life, lived by live things in +the way God meant. I loathe this modern +institution limping along with its burden of +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 205]</span> +carefully fed and tended idiots and invalids +and babies, better dead. I wish that I +were a Zulu."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Good Heavens!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Come," said the man, picking up his +load, "we can go now."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Had you finished?" She scrambled to +her feet.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'd done all that I could under the +circumstances."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I suppose the light changes so fast at +this time...." Emily was quite unsuspicious +and content. The intuition that +used to reign supreme in women was especially +lacking in her. She had not the +least idea of what her presence meant to the +unhappy artist.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Come, come," he repeated impatiently.</p> + +<p class="indent">They walked away then through the +pretty winding lane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It seems to me so awful that we are all +so hopeless," Emily went on presently. +"We are all put here and often see just what +should be done and can't do it possibly."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 206]</span> +"I do exactly what I choose," said +Lorenzo,—then he added: "as a usual +thing."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You must be very happy." She paused. +"I suppose that you have plenty of money +to live as you please."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm fortunate enough not to have any."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Goodness!" the exclamation was sincere. +The shock to Emily was dreadful. +"Why do you call that fortunate?" she +asked, after a little hasty agony of downfall +as to rich and generous travel, spaced +off by going to the theater.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Because it makes me know that I shall +do something in the world. A very little +money is enough to swamp a man nowadays, +when the idea of later being supported by a +woman is always a possibility. Oh," said +Lorenzo, with sudden irritation, "if there +weren't so many perfectly splendid women +and girls in the world, I'd go off and become +a Trappist. Everything's being knocked +into a cocked hat. I've had girls practically +make love to me. Disgusting."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 207]</span> +Emily felt her heart hammer hard. +"You're very old-fashioned in your views," +she said, a little faintly.</p> + +<p class="indent">They came out by her mother's back +gate as she spoke.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I am," said Lorenzo, "I admit it."</p> + +<p class="indent">Mrs. Mead came running out of the back +door. "Oh, Emily," she cried, "old Mrs. +Croft is dead. Jane sent for the doctor—she +sent a boy running—but she's +dead. Wherever have you been for so +long?"</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 208]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XIV" id="XIV"></a>CHAPTER XIV</h2> + +<p class="h2a">JANE'S CONVERTS</p> + +<p class="indent">THE feelings which revolved around +the dead body of old Mrs. Croft can +be better imagined than described; everybody +had wondered as to every contingency +except this. In the midst of the confusion +Jane moved quietly, a little white and with +lips truly saddened. "And I meant to do +such a lot for her,—I meant to help her so +much," she murmured from time to time.</p> + +<p class="indent">The doctor, a ponderous gentleman of +great weight in all ways, was very grave. +The doctor said that he had warned the +daughter of such a possible ending twenty +years before. "Heart failure was <i>always</i> +imminent," he declared severely, looking +upon Jane, Susan, and Mrs. Cowmull, who +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 209]</span> +had driven out with him and thus become +instantly a privileged person. "She never +ought to have been left alone a minute during +these last forty years. Even if she had +lived to be a hundred, the danger was always +there. Such neglect is awful." He stopped +and shook his head vigorously. "Awful," +he declared again with emphasis, "awful!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I didn't know that she had heart +disease," said Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No blame attaches to you," said the +doctor, veering suddenly about as to the +point in discussion; "nobody can blame +you. I shall exonerate you completely. +Of course, if you were not aware of the state +of the case, you couldn't be expected to consider +its vital necessities."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, and it was so vital," sobbed Mrs. +Cowmull. "Dear, sweet, old Mrs. Croft. +Our sunbeam. And to go off like that. +What good is life when people can die any +minute. Oh! Oh!"</p> + +<p class="indent">There was a brief pause for silent sorrow.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I never looked for her to die," Mrs. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 210]</span> +Cowmull went on, shaking her head. "I +always told Emily she'd outlive even +Brother Cattermole. So many people will, +you know. Dear, kind, loving friend! +And now to think she's gone. I can't make +it seem true. She's been alive so long. +Seems only yesterday that I was up to see +Katie about making a pie for the social, +and our dear, sweet friend was singing her +favorite song, <i>Captain Jinks of the Horse +Marines</i>, all the time. What spirits she +did have everywhere, except in her legs."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan sat perfectly quiet. The doctor +took Jane's arm and led her into the hall, +there to speak of the first few necessary +steps to be taken. Then he returned to the +sitting-room, gathered up Mrs. Cowmull +and departed, saying that he would send +"some practical person at once." Mrs. +Cowmull, who was widely known as having +practical designs on him, did not resent the +implied slur at her own abilities at all.</p> + +<p class="indent">After they were gone, there was a slight +further pause, and then Susan rose slowly +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 211]</span> +and went and laid her hands upon her +niece's shoulders. "Oh, Jane, that religion +of yours is a wonderful thing. I'm +converted."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane started. "Converted, Auntie?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes. You were sure that it would come +out all right and now see."</p> + +<p class="indent">Then a little white smile had to cross the +young girl's face. "The poor old woman," +she said gently, "to think of her lying there +all alone all that day. I thought that she +was sleeping so quietly."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, she was," said Susan.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, of course she was. It's just our +little petty way of thinking that masks all +of what is truly sacred and splendid behind +a veil of wrong thinking. Of course she +was sleeping quietly."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It'll be sort of awful if they can't find +Katie, though," Susan said next; "she left +no address, and I think it's almost silly to +try to hunt her up. I'm only too pleased +to pay for the funeral, I'm sure, and there +won't be any real reason for her returning."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 212]</span> +"No," said Jane thoughtfully.</p> + +<p class="indent">"And I really can look forward to +Matilda's coming back now," pursued +Susan. "I shan't mind a bit. Old Mrs. +Croft has done that much good, anyway,—she's +made me feel that Matilda's coming +back is just nothing at all. You see you +knew that everything was coming out all +right, but I'd never had any experience +with that kind of doings up till now, and +it was all new to me. I was only thinking +of when you and me would have to face +Matilda. Matilda would have looked +pretty queer if she'd come home to old Mrs. +Croft to tend, and me up and lively."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane didn't seem to hear. "I never once +thought of her dying," she said again; "oh, +dear, she had so much to learn. I expected +to do her such a lot of good."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wouldn't complain, Jane. I wouldn't +find fault with a thing. Goodness, think +if she'd begun singing <i>Captain Jinks</i> last +night. I've heard that sometimes she'd +sing it six hours at a stretch."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 213]</span> +Jane shook her head. "Who is to go +down and pack up that house?" she +wondered.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, the house can be rented furnished. +It's a nice home for anybody," said Susan, +"and the rent'll buy her a lovely monument."</p> + +<p class="indent">The funeral was fixed for the third day, +and some effort made to trace the daughter-in-law. +But that lady evidently didn't +care to be found.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's hardly any use going to a great deal +of expense to hunt her up," Lorenzo said +to Jane, "because the house is all there is, +and a thorough search with detectives would +just about eat it up alive."</p> + +<p class="indent">He probably was not wholly disinterested +in his outlook, for the next bit of news that +shook the community was that Lorenzo +Rath had taken Mrs. Croft's house and +moved in! Naturally Mrs. Cowmull was +far from pleased. "Of course it means +he's going to get married," she said to Miss +Vane, "but what folly to take a house so +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 214]</span> +soon. Who's to cook for him? And who's +he going to marry? Not Emily, I know. +She wouldn't have him."</p> + +<p class="indent">Miss Vane didn't know and didn't care. +"Not my Madeleine," she said promptly, +for her part; "she gets a letter every day. +She'll marry that man."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Then it's Jane Grey," said Mrs. Cowmull. +The town was greatly exercised, +and not as positive as to Emily's state of +mind as her aunt.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It'll be one of those two," Mrs. Ball said +to Miss Crining (both very superior women +and much given to meeting at the grocery +store). "They're both after him. Emily +chases him wherever he's posing woods +and cows, and the little appetite that Mrs. Cowmull +says he has, after going to Mrs. Ralston's, +shows what they're thinking of."</p> + +<p class="indent">Miss Crining shook her head. "Once +on a time girls were so sweet and womanly," +she said.</p> + +<p class="indent">"My," said Mrs. Ball, "I remember +when my husband asked me. I almost +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 215]</span> +fell flat. I'd never so much as thought of +him. I was engaged to a boy named +Richie Kendall, and Mr. Ball was bald, and +had all those children older than I was. +There was some romance about life then."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And me," said Miss Crining, with a +gentle sigh, "I never told a soul I was in +love till months after he was drowned. I +didn't know I was in love myself. Girls +used to be like that, modest, timid."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mr. Rath's very severe on girls nowadays, +Mrs. Cowmull says," said Mrs. Ball; +"but he's blind like all men are and will get +hooked when he ain't looking, like they all +do."</p> + +<p class="indent">But Lorenzo Rath didn't care about any +of the gossip; he was so happy over his +home. "I'll have a woman come and cook +occasionally," he explained blithely to Jane +and Susan, "and I'll get all my illustrating +off my hands in short order."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you illustrate?" Jane asked.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, that's my bread-and-butter job."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It'll be nice to have you in the neighborhood," +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 216]</span> +said Susan placidly; "to think +how it's all come about, too. I'm in heaven, +no matter what I'm doing. I just sit about +and pray to understand more of Jane's +religion. I'm gasping it down in big swallows. +I think it's so beautiful how she +does right, without having to take the +consequences."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed a little at that and went out +to get supper.</p> + +<p class="indent">"She's a nice girl," Lorenzo said, looking +after her; "when she leaves here, what +shall we do?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, heavens, I don't know," said +Susan. "I try never to think of it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And what is she going to do?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, she's going back to her nursing, +and I want to cry when I think that other +people will have her around and I shan't. +I'll be here alone with Matilda. Not but +what I'm a good deal more reconciled than +I was, when I thought I'd be alone with +Matilda and old Mrs. Croft, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, that would have been bad," said +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 217]</span> +Lorenzo soberly. "Well, I must be running +along. I've got a lot of work to do and a +lot of thinking, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan contemplated him earnestly. +"Well," she said, with fervor, "when Jane +goes, I'll still have you, anyway."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo, who had just risen, stopped +short at that. "Do you know an idea that +I'm just beginning to hold?" he asked +suddenly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No; how should I?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's this. Why shouldn't you and I try +working Jane's Rule of Life a little? I'm +dreadfully impressed with a lot she says. +Suppose you and I pulled together and made +up our minds that she was going to stay here +in some perfectly right and pleasant and +proper way. How, then? Don't you believe +maybe we could manage it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan stared. "But there couldn't be +any perfectly right, pleasant, proper way," +she said sadly, "because she wants to go."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'd like to try."</p> + +<p class="indent">The aunt shook her head, sighing heavily. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 218]</span> +"It's no use. There isn't a way. Nothing +could keep her. You see, she's got some +family debts to pay, and she can't rest till +she's paid 'em. I've begged and prayed +her to stay; I've told her that her own flesh +and blood has first claim, but she won't +hear to any kind of sense."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wish that we might try," Lorenzo +insisted. "I've listened to her till I just +about believe she really does know what +she's talking about. It seems as if it's all +so logical and after all, it's the way God +made the world, surely."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I know, but you and I ain't equal +to making worlds and won't be yet awhile."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't care," said the young man, turning +towards the door, "I'm going at it +alone, then. I don't believe that any one +in the world needs her as much as I do, and +I'm going to have her, and that by her own +methods, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan's mouth opened in widest amazement. +"Mercy on us, you ain't proposing +to her by way of me, are you? You don't +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 219]</span> +mean that you really do want to marry her, +do you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, I don't mean that I want to marry +her. I mean that I'm going to marry her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh! Oh!" the aunt cried faintly. +"Oh, goodness me! But I don't know why +I'm surprised, for I said you was in love with +her right from the start. I couldn't see +how you could help but be."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course I couldn't help but be. Who +could? She's one of the few real girls that +are left in the world these days. The +regular girls with lectures and diplomas +and stiff collars have spoiled the sweetest +things God ever made. Men don't thank +Heaven for any of these late innovations +wrought in womankind."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I know," said Susan; "my husband +was old-fashioned, too. I"—she stopped +short, because just then the door opened, +and Jane came in.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 220]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XV" id="XV"></a>CHAPTER XV</h2> + +<p class="h2a">REAL CONVERSATION</p> + +<p class="indent">BOTH Susan and lover jumped rather +guiltily, but Jane didn't notice. Or +if she did notice, it did not impress her as +anything worthy consideration. Among +the little weeds in the rose-garden of life, +did you ever think of what a common one is +that bother over how people act when you +"come in suddenly"? It is one of the petty +tortures of everyday existence. "They +stopped talking the instant they saw me!" +"They both turned red, when I opened the +door!" Well, what if they did? Is it a +happening of the slightest moment? Unless +one is guilty and in dread of discovery, +what can it matter who chatters or of what? +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 221]</span> +Stop and realize the real, separate, distinct +meaning of the phrase "He was above suspicion," +and see how it applies equally to +being safe from the evil thoughts <i>of</i> others +as well as being safe from the holding of evil +thoughts <i>towards</i> others. If people change +color at your approach and it makes you uncomfortable, +you are not above suspicion +either of or from others. Then look to it +well that henceforth you manage to root +out the double evil. There are a whole lot +of very uncomfortable family happenings +founded on the absolutely natural crossings +of family intercourse, and the only possible +way to go smoothly through such rapids is—as +the Irishman said—to pick up your +canoe and port around them. Don't go +down to the level of anything beneath your +own standard, because when you go down +anywhere for any reason, your standard +goes down with you. There is that peculiarity +about standards that we keep them +right with us, whether we go up or whether +we go down.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 222]</span> +"Oh, Jane," said Susan, "we're having +such an interesting time talking about your +religion."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane smiled. "I'm glad," she said +simply. "Did you decide to absorb some +of it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I'm converted, anyhow," said the +aunt; "nobody could live in the house +with you and not be, and Mr. Rath is going +to try it for a while, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked at Lorenzo a little roguishly. +"It's a contagion in the town," she said; +"I feel like an ancient missionary."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know," said Susan, "holding up a +cross. I've seen them in pictures."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, and I hold up the cross, too," said +Jane, "only most people wouldn't know it. +Do you know what the cross meant in the +long-ago times,—before the Christian +era?" she asked Lorenzo quickly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's the sunbeam transfixing and vivifying +the earth-surface. It was the holiest +symbol of the power of God. It embodied +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 223]</span> +divine life descending straight from heaven +and making itself a part of earth."</p> + +<p class="indent">"My!" exclaimed Susan, really amazed.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane smiled and laid her hand upon her +aunt's affectionately. "I love my cross," +she said; "it's the greatest emblem that +humanity can know, and, just because we +are human, it will always keep coming back +into our lives. Only it shouldn't be +preached as a burden, it should be preached +as an opportunity."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo sat watching her. A curious +white look passed over his face. He felt +for the moment that he hardly ought to +dare hope that this girl who was so full of +help for all should narrow her field of labor +to just him.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You'll end by being like Dinah in <i>Adam +Bede</i>," he said, trying to laugh; "you like +to teach and preach, don't you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't know," said Jane; "it's always +there, right on my heart and lips. I feel +as if the personal 'I' was only its voice."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't think she's exactly human," +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 224]</span> +said Susan meditatively; "she doesn't +strike me so."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't say that, Auntie," said the young +girl quickly; "I want to be human more +than anything else. I don't want to make +you or anybody feel that I'm not. It would +be as dreadfully lonely to be looked upon as +unhuman as to be looked upon as inhuman. +I want to work and love and be loved."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you're so different from everybody +else," said her aunt.</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I don't want to be different. I +want to just be a woman—or a girl."</p> + +<p class="indent">Some kindly intuition prompted Susan to +change the subject. "Mr. Rath and I +were talking about girls just now; we both +thought what a pity it is that there are so +few in these days."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I guess there are just as many girls as +ever, only they aren't so conspicuous," +Jane said, laughing at Lorenzo.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think they're more conspicuous," +said Lorenzo, "only they're the wrong +kind."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 225]</span> +"I liked the old kind," said Susan, "the +kind that stayed at home and wasn't wild +to get away and be going into business."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane laughed again. "You ought not +to blame the girls, Auntie. Lots of them +feel dreadfully over leaving home. But +they have to go out and work. I had to, I +know. It's some kind of big world-change +that's pushing us all on into different +places."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wasn't thinking of girls who do something +nice and quiet like you. I was thinking +of the others."</p> + +<p class="indent">"They have to go, too," said Jane. +"There's a fearful pressure that we don't +understand behind it all. A restlessness +and discontent that no one can alter."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, that's true," said Lorenzo; "I +never thought of it, but I can see that it is +so now that you've put it into my head."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've seen a lot of it. It's curious that +it seems to come equally to women who want +to work and to women who don't. I'm +sure I never wanted to earn my living, but +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 226]</span> +I was forced to it. And ever so many +others are, too. It's rather an awful feeling +that you're in the grip of a power that +sweeps your life beyond your guidance. +I'm trying hard to be big enough to live in +this century, but I'd have liked the last +better."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Don't you consider that there's anything +voluntary in the way women are acting +now?" Lorenzo asked, with real interest.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, I'm afraid not. I think that +there's something we don't understand, or +grasp, or—or quite see rightly. I believe +that everything is ordered and ordered +ultimately for the best, and I see the problems +of to-day as surely here by God's +will and to be worked out by learning the +conduct of the current instead of opposing +it. But still I really don't understand it all +as I wish that I did."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You really do feel God as a friend," +said Lorenzo, watching her illuminated face. +"He isn't just a religion to you, then?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"He's <i>everything</i> to me," said Jane reverently, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 227]</span> +"Help and Sunlight and Strength +and Daily Bread. That part of Him that +is energy manifests in us in one way, and +that part of Him that is divine right and +justice manifests in us in another way. My +part in this life is to learn to use them together, +but they and all else are all God."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan rose from her seat and stood contemplating +her niece and Lorenzo by turns. +"To think of talking like this in my house," +she said; "this is what I call real conversation. +I tell you, Jane, you certainly did +lift me into another life when you invited +old Mrs. Croft here. Every kind of religion +sinks right into me now, and I can +believe without the least bother. It's wonderful, +but I'm going to have a short-cake +for tea, so I'll have to go."</p> + +<p class="indent">She went away, and Lorenzo turned to +the window.</p> + +<p class="indent">There was a little pause while he wondered +about many things. Finally he held +out his hand abruptly. "You've gone a +long way, Jane," he said, "you've got a big +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 228]</span> +grip on life and its meaning, and you make +me understand as I never did before how +hopeless it is to wish that the wheels of time +will turn backward. But whatever you +may preach, you only prove what I said +and what I feel, that the old-fashioned, +sweet, home-keeping, winning and winnable +girl is gone, only she's gone in a different +way from what most people understand. +When she still exists, she exists for herself—not +for a man."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane felt her eyes fill suddenly. "Why +do you say that?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Because you prove it. A man might +adore you, but he couldn't hope to get you. +Could he?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Her eyes dropped. "Do you think that +it's all any harder on the man than it is on +the girl?" she asked. "If men feel bad +nowadays over the changes, how do you +suppose it is with the woman, unfitted to +fight and forced into the battle. A woman +isn't built as a man is; she's created for +another kind of work, much harder and +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 229]</span> +lasting, much longer than any man's labor. +And she has to leave that work of her own +either undone or only half-done and do +things unsuited to her. Of course there +are some girls and women who like it,—but +most of them don't. Most of them feel +dreadfully and would give anything to be +able to stay in a home and live the life God +meant to be woman's. There's always a +pitiful story behind nine out of every ten +bread-winning women, whether they go +out washing or are artists like you. A +woman never leaves her home until she's +forced to do so."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Are you sure that you know what you're +talking about? Aren't you an idealist? +Look at Emily Mead—" he smiled in spite +of his earnestness. "If she had a rag of +a chance, she'd fly off to-morrow. It +wouldn't take force."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane remained carefully grave. "That's +more her mother's fault than hers. Her +mother has taught her that girls only live +to marry."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 230]</span> +"And quite right, too. Don't you believe +it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It used to be true, but it isn't now. A +girl can't marry without a man, and the +world's all disjointed. It's a part of that +strange new leaven which causes civilization +to drive men and women both to become +homeless by separating them widely on +earth."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course it's a governmental crime to +send men by the hundreds of thousands to +fight it out alone in Canada and leave +their sisters to be old maids in England, +but governments are pretty stupid, nowadays."</p> + +<p class="indent">"We are all pretty stupid. We build +all our difficulties and then hang to them +and their consequences for dear life. It's +too bad in us."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do you mean woman?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, I mean everybody."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's depressing, isn't it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't think so. I think it's grand."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Grand!"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 231]</span> +"Yes, because I like to struggle in a big +way. And then, too, if I'm a woman forced +to work because I'm one part of the problem, +I'm also gloriously happy in being part +of the new upburst of comprehension that's +balancing and will soon overbalance such a +lot of the troubles."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You mean? Oh, you mean your way of +looking at things."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course I do. I'm so blessedly glad +of every circumstance in my life, because +each one led to my getting hold of just what +I have got hold of. I'm perfectly happy +and perfectly content. It's so beautiful +to be guided by a rule that never fails."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo couldn't but laugh. "I tell +you what," he said gayly, "I'll let you into +a little secret. I've made up my mind to +go to work and learn how to work that game +of yours myself. I want to be blessedly +glad and gloriously happy, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You've got to be in earnest, you know," +Jane said. "It's handling live wires to +amuse oneself with any force of God, and +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 232]</span> +will-power is more of a force than electricity."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I'm in earnest," said the artist. +"I've made my picture—as you say—and +I hang to it for grim death. Only I +can't see, if you feel as you do about home +and marriage, and all that, why you don't +make one, too."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm making ever so many homes," said +Jane. "I'm teaching home-making. +That's a Sunshine Nurse's business, and it +would be selfish in me to desert my task. +Besides—" she paused.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 233]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XVI" id="XVI"></a>CHAPTER XVI</h2> + +<p class="h2a">THE MOST WONDERFUL THING EVER +HAPPENED</p> + +<p class="indent">SHE stopped and hesitated.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," he said impatiently, "besides—?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I wonder if it would be right to be quite +frank with you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Nothing sincere is ever wrong. Of +course you ought to be quite frank with me,—aren't +you that with every one?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Still she considered.</p> + +<p class="indent">"What stops you?" he asked. "Go on. +Tell me everything. It's my right."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why is it your right?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Because I love you, and you know it."</p> + +<p class="indent">She started violently, then turned very +white. "Don't say that. I've always +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 234]</span> +thought of you as engaged to Madeleine. +She was talking to me, and I thought—I—" +She stopped, quite shaken.</p> + +<p class="indent">"You misunderstand her. She's always +been in love with one fellow—the one that +her parents are against. He's even poorer +than I am."</p> + +<p class="indent">Then Jane pressed her lips together and +interlocked her fingers. "I can never +marry. I never think of it. There's money +to be paid, nobody to pay it but me, and no +way to get it except to earn it."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo looked almost sternly at her. +"What about the book you lent me; it +would say that that was setting limits. It +says that we've not to concern ourselves +with ways and means. I've only to concern +myself with loving you. The rest will +come along of its own accord."</p> + +<p class="indent">She shook her head. "No, it won't. +This world is all learning, and it's part of +my lesson not to be able to apply it in absolute +faith to myself. So many teachers +have wisdom to give away which they can't +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 235]</span> +quite take unto themselves, you know." +She smiled a little tremulously.</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you ought to take it unto yourself. +It ought to be easy and simple for you to +realize that if conditions are false, they don't +exist; that if you want a home, it's because +you are going to have one; that if I love +you, it's because it's right that you should be +loved."</p> + +<p class="indent">She put her hands down helplessly on +each side of the chair-seat. "I never even +think of such things," she said, almost in a +whisper.</p> + +<p class="indent">"But why not?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've always been so necessary to others. +I've no rights in my own life."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But if life is a thing to guide, why not +guide your beneficence as well from a basis +of home as from one of homelessness?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Nothing has ever seemed to be for me, +myself. Everything has always pointed to +me for others."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo paced back and forth. "But it +is the women like you who should show the +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 236]</span> +way out of the wilderness and back to the +right, instead of attempting to order the +chaos while sweeping on with it. If there +be a real truth in this new teaching which +lays hold of all those who are in earnest so +easily and so quickly, its first care should +be to demonstrate happiness in the lives of +its believers,—not the negative happiness +of wide-spread devotion to others, but the +positive lessons of joy in the center from +which springs—must spring—the next +generation of better, wiser men and women, +those among whom I expect to live as an old +man."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane turned her face away, her eyes filled +with tears. "You make me feel very small +and petty," she said; "you show me a way +beyond what I had guessed. But I can't +grasp at it; I'm too used to asking nothing +for myself. I'm always so sure that God +is managing for me. And I have so much +to do."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perhaps realization that God is managing +is all that you need to set right. Perhaps +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 237]</span> +that confidence will bring you all +things. Even me." He laughed a little.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It has brought me all that I needed. +Daily bread, daily possibilities of helpfulness,—I +don't ask more, except 'more +light.'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"It sounds a little presumptuous coming +from me, but perhaps I can help you towards +your end, even as to 'more light.' At any +rate, I'll try if you'll let me."</p> + +<p class="indent">She sat quite still. Finally she lifted up +her eyes—and they were beautiful eyes, +big and true—and said, the words coming +softly forth: "It would be so wonderful."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo didn't speak. He felt choked +and gasping. To him it was also "so wonderful," +as wonderful as if he hadn't lived +with it night and day ever since the first +minute of knowing her. "I think I'd better +go," he said very gently, realizing keenly +that he must not press her in this first blush +of the new spring-time. "I've 'made my +picture' you know, and I won't let it fade, +you may be sure. And you must believe +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 238]</span> +in happiness for yourself,—you tell us that +the first step is all that counts. Get the +seed into the ground then. I'll do the rest."</p> + +<p class="indent">She sat quite still. "If I could only +try," she whispered. He turned quickly +away and was gone.</p> + +<p class="indent">After a dizzy little while she rose and +went into the kitchen. Susan was moving +briskly about.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Two cups flour, four teaspoonfuls baking +powder, one of sugar, one of salt, two +of butter, two of lard, cup half water, half +milk, pour in pan greased and bake in hot +oven. Scotch scone-bread for lunch," she +said, almost suiting the deed to the word. +"Is Mr. Rath still here?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, he's gone."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You know, Jane, he's caught your religion. +I never heard anything like it. +He's got the whole thing pat. I'd be almost +scared to go round teaching a thing like +that. Why, folks'll be doing anything they +please soon. I've been wondering if I could +get strong enough to kind of dispose of +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 239]</span> +Matilda, in some perfectly right way, you +know. I wouldn't think of anything that +wasn't perfectly right, you know."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane seemed a little numb and stood +watching the buttering of the scone-pan +without speaking.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I keep saying: 'Matilda doesn't want +to come back. Matilda's disposed of in a +perfectly pleasant way.' I've been saying +it ever since I began on those scones. I +guess I've said it twenty times, and I'm +beginning to make a real impression on myself. +I'm beginning to feel sure God is +fixing things up. It's too beautiful to feel +God taking an interest in your affairs. +Matilda doesn't want to come home. +Matilda is completely disposed of in a perfectly +pleasant way." Susan's accents were +very emphatic.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Auntie," said Jane, turning her eyes +towards her and rallying her attention by a +strong effort, "you know your perfect faith +is because Aunt Matilda really isn't anxious +to come home. It's only if you're doubting +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 240]</span> +that there's any doubt about it. One +doesn't alter Destiny, one only apprehends +it. Oh, dear," she said though, sitting +down suddenly, and hiding her face in her +hands, "the thing about light is that it +always keeps bursting over you with a new +light, and my own teaching has suddenly +come to me as if I'd never known what any +of it meant before. I'm too stunned at +seeing how I've limited myself. I'm really +too stupid."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan glanced at her as she poured the +batter into the pan, and then kept glancing. +Her face grew softened, "I wouldn't worry, +dear," she said finally, "don't you bother +over anything. God's taking care of everything +and everybody. It's every bit of it +all right. You must know that yourself, +or you never could have taught it to me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I do know it,—but in spite of +myself I can't see—I can't dare think—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"You told me not to worry over old Mrs. +Croft," said Susan, coming around by her +side and putting her arm about her; "you +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 241]</span> +said worry spoiled everything. And I did +try so hard."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, I know, I'll try. I really will—But—" +suddenly she turned deep crimson, +"it seems too awful for me to take one +minute to work on myself or my life. I +need all my time for others."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But you don't have to," said Susan, +"all you've got to do is to know things are +right. You know they're right because +they are right. Everything's coming along +fine, and you just feel it coming; that's +your part. My goodness, Jane, isn't this +funny? There isn't a blessed thing you've +preached to me that I ain't having to preach +back to you now. You don't seem to have +sensed hardly any of your own meaning. +Talk about being a channel; you'd better +choke up a little and hold back some for +yourself."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane threw her arms around her and +kissed her. "Auntie, you're right, you're +right. I won't doubt a mite more. I'll try +to know as much as I seem to have taught."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 242]</span> +"Just be yourself, you Sunshine Jane, +you," Susan was clinging close to the girl +she loved so well, "just be yourself. Nothing +else is needed."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," Jane whispered, "I will."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's the thing," said Susan; "'cause +you've certainly taught us a lot. I'll lay +the table now," she moved towards the door, +"Matilda doesn't want to come home. Matilda +wants to stay away in some perfectly +pleasant way," she added with heavy emphasis, +passed through, and let the door close.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane was left alone in the kitchen.</p> + +<p class="indent">"He said he loved me!" she thought +over and over. "It seems so wonderful—the +most wonderful thing that has ever +happened since the world was made. He +said he loved me!"</p> + +<p class="indent">She went up-stairs to her own room and +shut the door softly. "Of course I can never +marry him," she whispered aloud, "but +he did say he loved me. Oh, I know that +nothing so wonderful ever was in this world +before!"</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 243]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XVII" id="XVII"></a>CHAPTER XVII</h2> + +<p class="h2a">WHY JANE SHOULD HAVE BELIEVED</p> + +<p class="indent">THE Sunshine Nurse was long in seeking +sleep that night and early to rise +the next morning. She found herself suddenly +metamorphosed—facing a new +world—two worlds in fact. There was the +world of Lorenzo's actually loving her, +which was a dream from which she would +surely awaken, and then there was that +second world of wonder, the world of her +own teaching, a world in which she started, +big-eyed, at all in which she had trusted, +and wondered if it could be possible that +what she believed firmly and preached so +ardently was really true. "It isn't setting +limits to face what must be," she said +over and over to herself, "and I <i>must</i> pay +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 244]</span> +poor father's debts, and there is no possible +way for me to get the money except to +earn it bit by bit." The statement had +gone to bed with her, and it rose with her +when she rose; it looked indisputable, incontrovertible, +as all fixed statements have +a way of looking—and yet each time that +she made it she felt hot with guilt. "It's +setting limits," cried her soul, "it's saying +that God can't possibly do what He pleases," +and, as she listened to the strong, heaven-sent +cry of rebellion against petty earthly +laws, she struggled in the meshes of her own +old earlier learning, the "old garment" +which clings so close about us all, and which +we simply must discard before we can don +the new robe of Infinite Hope and Radiant +Belief in God's law of Only Good for Each +and Every One.</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane always rose an hour before her aunt. +The hour was spent in opening windows, +brushing up and building the kitchen fire. +It was always a pleasant hour, for she +usually filled it to the brim with work well +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 245]</span> +done and thoughts sent strongly and happily +out over the coming time. But to-day +all this was changed; new thoughts rioted +forth on every side, and a sort of chaos took +the place of her usually sunny calm. This +riot and chaos is the common, logical outcome +of all who feel sure that they are wiser +than God. You cannot possibly set any +border to His Kingdom and then be happy +in that outer darkness which you have +deliberately chosen for your own part. As +well ask a cow to shut herself out of her +pasture and rest happy in the waste beyond. +"I mustn't think, because it is none of it +for me—" she repeated over and over, +much as if the aforesaid cow declared, "I +am barred out—I can never get back—I +must starve contentedly." Jane—who +would have laughed at my illustration +quite as you have laughed yourself—saw +only distress in her own, and had to wink +away so many tears that finally in maddest +self-defense she rushed out doors and fled +to the little garden that had, through so +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 246]</span> +many years, been Susan's refuge in such a +droll way.</p> + +<p class="indent">And Lorenzo was there!</p> + +<p class="indent">He looked very blithe and happy. +"Well," he said, "have you thought it over +and decided that you're right, after all?"</p> + +<p class="indent">She was panting, and surprise flooded +her face with color. "Oh—" she gasped, +"oh!" and then: "Right—of course +I'm right!"</p> + +<p class="indent">He approached, his hand extended. +"Right in believing, or right in mistrusting?"</p> + +<p class="indent">She gave him her hand, and he took it. +"Don't put it that way," she said; "it +isn't that way."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But, dear Jane, that's the only way to +put it. It's the way you've been teaching +us. Either we can look up and ahead confidently, +or you're all wrong. I can't believe +that you're ever even a little bit +wrong, so I'm going to believe that it's all +true."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, no—it isn't—I mean—Oh, in +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 247]</span> +my case, it can't be so. Everything that +I said was true, only I myself am meant to—to +work—not to—to marry. It's a kind +of pledge I've taken to myself. It doesn't +change the teaching." Then she dragged +her hand free.</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo smiled. "You can't tell me any +of that. I know. I'm the happiest man +in the world." Then he went on, taking +up the rake and scratching a little here +and there: "Like other pupils, I've surpassed +my teacher. You've preached, and +I practice; you can describe God's thoughts, +and I think them. You're sure that He +can do anything, and I know what He's +going to do. I've been let straight into one +of His secrets. It's been revealed to me +how the world is run."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane stared. "How can you talk so?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I talk so because I know so. Everything's +coming right for you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You're crazy," she tried to laugh.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I've heard people say that of you. Not +that it matters."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 248]</span> +She stood watching him and considering +his words. "I wouldn't let you give me the +money to straighten out my father's affairs, +even if you were ever so rich, you know," +she said slowly. "I couldn't."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And I wouldn't let Auntie pay the debts."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I know. God doesn't require either +your aunt's help or mine in this matter."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane's eyes moistened slightly. "Please +don't make a joke of anything so hard and +sad."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm not joking; I'm a veritable apostle +of joy. I'm as happy as I can be."</p> + +<p class="indent">She looked at him with real wonder because +his appearance certainly bore out +his words. "I wish that I knew what you +meant."</p> + +<p class="indent">He dropped the rake, came to her side, +and caught her hand. "Can't you trust +God—can't you trust me?—won't you +try?"</p> + +<p class="indent">She looked up into his face. "I wish +that I could, but how can I?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 249]</span> +"You ought to know. So deep and big +and true a nature. Surely you ought to +be able to understand your own teaching!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"But I can't see any way."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Your book says that one must not +think of ways; one must just look straight +to the good end."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, but there isn't any such end possible +for me."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo dropped her hand and laughed +out loud. And then he caught her in his +arms and kissed her.</p> + +<p class="indent">She screamed. To her it was the greatest +shock of her life, for no man had ever kissed +her before. "Oh—oh, mercy!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Matters were not helped much by Susan's +looking over the fence just then and crying +out abruptly: "Well, I declare!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Mrs. Ralston," said Lorenzo, not even +blushing, "you're the very person we need +this minute. I want to marry Jane, and +she won't hear to it because of her father's +debts. The debts are all right and everything's +all right, only she won't believe it. +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 250]</span> +I wish you'd climb the fence and help me +persuade her, for although I <i>know</i> she'll end +by marrying me, I've just set my heart on +converting her to her own religion first."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan swung easily over the fence. +"You're just right, Mr. Rath, you ought +to marry her. She's the nicest person to +have around the house that I ever saw; she's +far too good to be a nurse. How much +did your father owe, you Sunshine Jane, +you? Maybe I can pay it. I will if I +can."</p> + +<p class="indent">"There," said Lorenzo; "see how easy it +is to evolve money if you'd only trust a +little?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked at him and then at Susan. +"I couldn't take your money, Auntie," +said she, quite gently, but quite firmly. +"And then, too," she added, with her +roguish smile, "you've left it to Aunt +Matilda."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, but dear," Susan's face became +suddenly radiant, "you know I've been +working your religion on her; maybe she +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 251]</span> +isn't coming back at all; maybe something +will happen; maybe she's going to be +drowned or something like that in some +perfectly right way."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No," said Lorenzo soberly. "It isn't +necessary to plan as to God's business at +all. He knows. I don't think that Jane +ought to take anybody's money; she ought +to pay the debts with her own money, but +I can't see why she can't trust and know it's +coming."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Because there's no place for it to come +from," said Jane firmly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Unless Matilda—" Susan interposed.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I believe I'm better at her religion than +she is herself," said Lorenzo. "I declare, +I believe that there's nothing that I can't +get now. I wanted a house, and I worked +just as the book said! I saw myself living +cosily alone, and in less than a week I was +living cosily alone. Now I want Jane with +me in the house, and I mean to have her, +and I shall have her, and there's no doubt +about that; but I do wish—with all my +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 252]</span> +heart—that she could rise to a higher +plane."</p> + +<p class="indent">"If that's all, I know how to manage that +easily enough," said Susan. "We could +get old Mr. Cattermole in for a week and +raise Jane's plane with him, just like she +raised mine with Mrs. Croft."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, she'll rise," said her lover quietly. +"We must give her time and help her, +that's all."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane stood doubting between them. Her +aunt regarded her wistfully. "Dear me," +she said, "I wonder if I could screw myself +up to believing she'll come in for a fortune. +I want to help, but I'm a little like her—I +can't for the life of me see where it's to +come from."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But that isn't the question at all," said +Lorenzo, "the question isn't how—the +question is just the faith. Why, it's the +corner-stone of the whole thing! It's the +moving into God's world where nothing +but good can be, and you know you're +there because you see only good coming in +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 253]</span> +all directions! Just good—nothing but +good! I don't see why Jane holds back so. +I know that she can get that money and +get every other thing she wants in life, including +me, and I'm one of the nicest fellows +alive—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"That's so—" interposed Susan.</p> + +<p class="indent">"If she'll only put out her hand with +confidence. I've studied that book till +I'm full of it, and I know that I'm going to +have her for my wife, and I know it absolutely, +and I want her to know it, +too."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan began to get back over the fence. +"I'm going in about breakfast," she said; +"the trouble with us is we all need hot coffee +to brace up our souls."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Keep on declaring the truth," Lorenzo +reminded her, as she walked off upon the +other side.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I will. I'll say 'Jane is going to get +some money' and 'Matilda doesn't want to +come home to live,' alternately."</p> + +<p class="indent">When she was out of hearing the two +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 254]</span> +young people remained silent for a few +seconds. Then the man spoke.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Dear," his voice was very gentle, "I +want to tell you something. I've had a +very great experience in the last twenty-four +hours. It isn't loving you—it's that I've +been allowed to see a little bit of life from +God's standpoint. Don't you want to +know the real truth about all this?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"What do you mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm going to tell you, because you'll see +the lesson and learn it with me. We don't +doubt that God knows all that has been or +is to be, do we?—or that in our minutes of +fiercest pain or trouble He looks calmly to +the end beyond?"</p> + +<p class="indent">She shook her head. "No, of course +not."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, dearest girl, I was allowed last +night to put myself in the Deity's place +and see one corner of the universe as He +must see the whole."</p> + +<p class="indent">Her eyes grew big. "What do you +mean?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I mean this. I want you, and I understand +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 255]</span> +perfectly about the money. I sat +down last night and I labored with myself +until I made myself <i>know</i> that it was yours. +I can't tell you just how it came to me, but +I knew it. It is yours and yours absolutely, +and now I want you to realize it and believe +in it without question, before I give it to +you. Will you do that? I'm asking of +you the faith that Jesus preached. Can +you believe?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane looked at him wonderingly. "You +mean—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I mean just what I say."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't receive money from you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"It isn't my money."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't understand. I only know that +there is no way that I can get the money."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo looked at her a minute, and then +said slowly and very gently: "I've found +Mrs. Croft's will. She left all that she had +to whoever took care of her the night she +died. It appears that she had a good deal +more than any one supposed. It's all +yours, dear. Now you see why you should +have trusted."</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 256]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XVIII" id="XVIII"></a>CHAPTER XVIII</h2> + +<p class="h2a">IN A PERFECTLY RIGHT WAY</p> + +<p class="indent">WHEN Susan, looking out of the +window, saw the two whom she +had left behind coming across the grass, +she knew instantly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"They've settled it somehow," she exclaimed +in supremest joy, and whirled to +whisk the bacon off the stove.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Auntie," said Jane, from outside the +window, the minute after, "I am just +dumb. I don't believe I'll ever be able to +lift up my head in life again."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Auntie," said Lorenzo, over her +shoulder, "she's inherited her fortune."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan gave a scream. "Oh, good +mercy!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, dear," said her niece, now in the +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 257]</span> +doorway, "only I can't believe it. I think +that it's a dream."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You see she still isn't able to rise to +the proper heights of trust," laughed her +lover, also now in the doorway, "but I +have hopes of yet teaching her to believe +what she believes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Come straight in and help me set all +this on the table, so that I can listen with +a free mind." Susan's appeal was pathetic +in the extreme. "Where <i>did</i> she get it, +anyhow?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Auntie, it's the most wonderful +thing you ever heard of." Jane took up +the coffee-pot and led the way.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I did it all, except I didn't provide the +money," said Lorenzo, and the next minute +they were all seated, and he could tell the +whole story.</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan didn't scream. She sat still, a +bit of toast in her hand, listening breathlessly. +When Lorenzo had finished, "Oh, +that new religion!" she murmured in an +awed voice, and then, "Nothing like this +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 258]</span> +ever happened in this town before, I +know."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm more bewildered over it's being +there for me and my not being able to believe +than I am by the money," said Jane. +"Oh, Auntie, what a lesson, what a lesson!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"You would limit yourself, you see," +said Lorenzo; "you wouldn't believe."</p> + +<p class="indent">"How could I ever imagine such a +thing?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"You didn't have to imagine,—you +only had to expect."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You laid limits, you see," said Susan, +suddenly beginning to pour out the coffee, +and pouring with a glad dash that swept +over cup and saucer together. "I expect +if God hadn't been patient—like Mr. +Rath—He could have very well hid that +will forever. There may be a lot of such +goings on in the world, for all we know. +My goodness, suppose I'd been like Matilda +and not have had old Mrs. Croft around +for one minute,—it makes me ill to think +of it! It's a lesson for me, too."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 259]</span> +"Life is all lessons," said Jane. "Dear +me, think of Aunt Matilda's surprise!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Think of it! Good mercy, how can I +wait to tell her!" Susan's whole face +beamed. "I don't mind a bit her coming +back now. That shows the good of making +that declaration about her. Those declarations +are a great thing. I've told +myself Matilda was coming back in a +perfectly right way so many times that now, +however she came back, I'd be positive it +was perfectly right."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Ah, Auntie," said Jane, "you've got +hold of another great truth. Every one +seems quicker than me."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, you started us at it, anyhow," +said Susan kindly. "Oh my, but I'm +happy! Why, I believe I'm really in a +hurry now for Matilda to come back, just +so I can tell her. Think of that—me +really and truly anxious to see Matilda +again! My, you Sunshine Jane, you—what +a lot of difference you've made in +me."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 260]</span> +"When is your aunt coming?" Lorenzo +asked Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"She went for three weeks," said Jane; +"it will be three weeks next Thursday."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Goodness, only three weeks, and it +seems like three years?" observed Susan. +"What a lot has happened! There's Jane—and +her religion—and me up and well—and +old Mrs. Croft here and gone—and +you, Mr. Rath,—and then you and +Jane—and now this money."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I can't believe any of it," said Jane; +"I try, but I just can't. I guess I'm hopelessly +limited. I'm too bewildered, I—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll tell you what ails you," said her +aunt warmly. "It's that you've spread +yourself too much; you've given such a +lot away everywhere that you've got to +just stop and let the tide run backwards +into you yourself for a while. It's nature. +Nature and the new religion combined."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I feel overwhelmed by the coming-back +tide then," said Jane; "I don't deserve +it all."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 261]</span> +Her aunt started to reply, but was +stopped by a sudden loud bang outside.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Goodness, what's that?" she exclaimed.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Auto tire burst, I think. I'll go and +see," said Lorenzo, jumping up and going +out.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Jane," said Susan solemnly, "that's a +young man in a million. Think of his +finding that will. My, but he'll make a +good husband!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I just can't realize any of it," said her +niece. She seemed to be totally unequal +to any other view of her present situation.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, you'd better realize it," said her +aunt, "because it's coming right along. +What will Mrs. Mead say, I wonder! +Dear me, how every one will wish they'd +tried to get up a plane or two by having old +Mrs. Croft to visit them. If that poor +old thing could only come back, the whole +town would just adore to have her on a +visit now, and every one would sit up all +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 262]</span> +night and listen to <i>Captain Jinks</i> so cheerfully. +She used to sing <i>Rally round the +flag, boys</i> too,—I forgot that. She used +to sing it when she heard the roosters begin +to crow. But nobody would have minded, +whatever she sang now."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, there's—" Jane hesitated and +blushed.</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo stood in the door. "It wasn't a +burst tire," he explained briefly; "it's a +new kind of siren they're using. It's +friends from out of town, Mr. and Mrs. +Beamer."</p> + +<p class="indent">"They've got the wrong house," said +Susan. "I don't know any Beamers."</p> + +<p class="indent">"They asked for Mrs. Ralston."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Then they're selling something, grape-wine +or hand-knit lace, or something. +I don't want to see 'em."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll go," said Jane. And went at once. +In the pretty, changed sitting-room she +found the visitors—Mrs. Beamer tall and +of large build, with a handsome motor-costume. +Mr. Beamer also large, very wiry, +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 263]</span> +and with rampant gray hair. Mrs. Beamer +was Matilda.</p> + +<p class="indent">But what a changed Matilda! "Well, +Jane," coming forward and holding out +both hands, "did you and Susan feel it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane staggered and laid hold of a chair. +"Feel—" she stammered—"feel what? +Oh, Aunt Matilda!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Did you feel the good I've been doing +you? How's my sister?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"She—oh, she's all right."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Up and dressed?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"There, you see!" Matilda turned to +Mr. Beamer, triumph radiating her whole +figure. "It worked,—oh, Matthew, it +worked." Then she turned back to Jane. +"Get up right off, didn't she? Same day +I left?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Y—yes." Jane clung more tightly to +the chair. She began to doubt the ground +beneath her feet.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perfectly well, strong, able-bodied,—isn't +she?"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 264]</span> +"Yes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You see?—" to Mr. Beamer. Then, +"Oh, it's too splendid! I s'pose the cat's +stopped snooping, too, hasn't he?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Y—yes."</p> + +<p class="indent">"House all clean? Garden growing +fine?"—</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, indeed."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And you, Jane, how are you?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, I'm all right. I—I've become +engaged."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You hear that, Matthew? And the +town?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Everybody's well."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Did you ever in all your life!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, old Mrs. Croft died!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Did she indeed. Katie happy?—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Katie was away. She died here."</p> + +<p class="indent">"How nice! I expect she enjoyed every +minute of it. Oh, Jane, you don't know +how happy your every word is making +me!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Shan't I call auntie?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, we'll go out and have breakfast +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 265]</span> +with you. We had one breakfast so as +to make it easy for you to have us have it +with you."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Do come right out to the table." Jane +led the way. "I can't think what Aunt +Susan will say!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Never mind what she says—it'll be +just right. Everything always is. Come, +Matthew;" then Mrs. Matilda Beamer led +off, and Mr. Matthew Beamer followed, +smiling cheerfully. He seemed to be a +very cheerful man.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Perhaps I'd better go first and just +prepare auntie," Jane suggested hastily.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No need. She always yelled when +she saw me suddenly, and this time it will +be for joy. Life is going to be all joy for +Susan now."</p> + +<p class="indent">Jane turned the button of the dining-room +door. "Auntie Susan, it's Aunt +Matilda and Mr. Beamer."</p> + +<p class="indent">Susan justified her sister's views by forthwith +giving the yell of her whole life. +"Ma—tilda!—And Mr. Beamer!—"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 266]</span> +Matilda went up to her, seized her, gave +her a good hug and a real kiss. "I've +made lots of mistakes," she said, with a +big tear in each eye, "but somehow it was +written that I should be allowed to make +them right. Susan, this is Matthew. Sit +down, Matthew. Sit down, every one."</p> + +<p class="indent">Lorenzo hastily pushed up chairs, and +they all sat down.</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'll get some more dishes," Jane exclaimed, +hurrying into the pantry.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Matilda!" Susan looked almost ready +to faint. "Are you—are you—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I'm married," said Matilda. "I don't +know what I've ever done to deserve it, +but I'm married. It's the most beautiful +romance that ever was in the world, and +we've come to tell you all about it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, do!" Susan exclaimed. "Jane, +come back! Think of another romance, +and Matilda, too! Well, what next!"</p> + +<p class="indent">Matilda smiled quite radiantly. "We +met on the train the day I left here," she +began; "it was right off. He took me out +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 267]</span> +on the back platform of the car and opened +my eyes to life, and we just suited, didn't +we, Matthew?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Tell it all," said Mr. Beamer; "tell +the beginning."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," said his wife, "I will, I'll tell it +all. It's so splendid it would be a pity to +skip anything. You see, he looked at me +and—well, really, Matthew, I think you'd +better tell the first part."</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, you tell," said Mr. Beamer.</p> + +<p class="indent">"No, Matthew, you tell it, and I'll help +anywhere I can."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well," said her husband, "then I'll +begin with saying, Sister Susan, Niece +Jane, and young man, that I'd better tell +you what I am, first of all, because I'm the +only one of the kind in the world so far +as I know. You see, one of those Bible +miracles, that no one can seem to lay hold +of any more, got into me, and I'm the +result."</p> + +<p class="indent">"That is all true," interposed Matilda, +her plain face quite metamorphosed, as +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 268]</span> +she looked at her husband and then at +them. "Every word he says is true, and +it's all miracles."</p> + +<p class="indent">"You see I was just a plain, ordinary +man, with a nice business and a good +disposition," Mr. Beamer went on, "and +I did get so awful tired of things as they +were going, and I used to wish everything +was different, and then one day, all of a +God-blessed sudden, it came over me, with +a shock like lightning, that wanting things +different is the first step to getting 'em +different, and that if you've got the brain +to see what's lacking, you've got the body +to turn to and help fill up the hole. I +didn't get religion out of a book; I got it +just like that. I was sitting in a rocking-chair +with a palm-leaf fan, and I got up and +put the fan on the shelf and knew I was +all made new. The very next day I read +about a doctor as set up some nurses—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, my goodness," Susan cried, "hear +that, Jane!"</p> + +<p class="indent">"—as was to spread sunshine, and I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 269]</span> +thought that was a good idea, only I +couldn't see a place in it for me, 'cause I +wasn't young and wasn't no girl to go +'round spreading nothing. I looked upon +it that being a man, my business wasn't +to spread things—a man's business is +to get the stuff to spread; so I figured out +that being as I was a man, I could maybe +help make the sunshine, and then any one +could slather it on that pleased. So I +began to look about for some sunshine to +make, and the handiest field I see was +folks with hard lines around their mouths; +there's a powerful lot of them around, you +know,—ain't nothin' so hard to break up +in life as hard lines around mouths. So I +set out to plow fields of hard lines." +He paused. It was a picture, a picture +painted in heavenly colors to see his face +at the moment, full of its own heartfelt, +tried, and true enthusiasm, and the faces +of those of his four listeners, each touched +with the spiritual light shed by recent +events over his or her own individual path.</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 270]</span> +"Do go on," Jane whispered softly.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Well, whenever I'd see a hard man +sitting alone, I'd go up to him and hold +out my hand and say, 'Well, I ain't laid +eyes on you, I don't know when!' That +wasn't no lie, and 'most always we'd get +a-talking. Then I'd say, 'I'm a harmless +crank that likes to go round making friends, +and I took a fancy to you right off.' It +was wonderful all I come up against. Why, +the hardest folks was just aching to sit +down and explain that they wasn't hard at +all. It was the most interesting thing I +ever got hold of. I got arrested once for a +gold-brick man, and it give me a fine chance +at the jailers and some of the men in prison. +Pretty soon everything that turned up +seemed to just come along to give me a +chance to make a little sunshine. Pretty +soon life was all nothing but sunshine +chances. I got hold of some books that +showed me that lots of others were trying +some similar games, and all working hard, +and I picked out one book that 'most anybody +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 271]</span> +could understand, and I used to carry +it to read from. Would you believe that +I wore out that book about a hundred +times and sold it more'n five hundred times +and give it away 'most a thousand times. +I got where hard lines was just play to me. +I've now got where they're flowers in my +garden. I just fly at 'em. If they don't +give up to one course, they do to another. +I travel about looking for 'em. I was on +my last trip when I see Matilda sittin' +across the aisle from me, and I said to +myself right off, 'What fine lines!' So I +went right over and shook hands with +her—"</p> + +<p class="indent">"He said he feared maybe he'd made +a mistake," interrupted his wife, "and I +said—God forgive me!—'If you speak +to me again, I'll call out to the conductors!'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"And I said: 'Madam, excuse me, I'm +only a harmless crank as is trying to help +folks as is sick or in trouble, and you look +like a woman as could tell me of some I +could help, maybe!'"</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 272]</span> +"Then I thought of you, Susan," said +the sister; "you see, I'd been looking out +of the window, and the view was so pretty, +and it kind of come over me how awful +hard it was to lie in bed—and—and I felt +kind of bad, and his face looked kind, and +I said: 'Well, sit down. I do know somebody +sick.'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"So I set down," went on Mr. Beamer, +"and in just a little while she let up like +everybody does and told me the whole +story, and then I took her out on the +back platform and we was swinging 'round +curves of mighty lovely scenery, and I got +out my book and I begin to read aloud to +her."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And I got hold of the idea like mad," +said Matilda. "I said right off: 'Then +Susan's really all well now?' an' he said: +'She's been well always,' and I says: +'And my arm's well,' and he said: 'Nothin' +ain't ever ailed your arm except your own +innard feelings, and they're gone now,' +and then I just put my hands over my face +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 273]</span> +and says: 'Oh, God, forgive me for lots +and lots and lots of things.'"</p> + +<p class="indent">There was another little pause, and then +Susan said very low: "And God did it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And then," said Mr. Beamer, "I says +to her: 'Now, if you want to see how true +everything I've been saying is, we'll just +put this to a practical proof.' I'd noticed +a woman with lines back there in the car +slapping two sleepy children, and I told +Matilda we'd each take a child for an hour +and give her lines a chance to smooth out +a little, and then we'd come back on the +platform and talk it over."</p> + +<p class="indent">"So we did it," said Matilda, "and when +I took the baby back to the woman, she +burst out crying and said she'd tried to +hold in all day and just couldn't any longer, +cause her mother was sick and had been +sick so long, and she couldn't leave the +children to go to her 'cause the children was +the neighbor's and left with her to board, +and she'd never liked children and only took +'em 'cause her mother needed the money."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 274]</span> +"Showing," interrupted Mr. Beamer, +"how we'd misjudged her and her hard +lines, which is another feature of my crusade, +as lots don't think enough about."</p> + +<p class="indent">"But what come next was just like a +story, too," Matilda said. "When I got +to Mrs. Camp's at last, I found Mrs. Camp +so changed that if I hadn't met Matthew +on the train and got something to hold +on to, I couldn't have stayed in the house +an hour."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, what was the matter with Mrs. +Camp?" Susan asked anxiously.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Why, all Mrs. Camp's family is married +now, and it seems she was so lonely she's +turned into a social settler or some such +thing, and her nice, quiet house where I'd +looked to rest was one swarm of Italians +learning English and girls learning sewing +and women asking advice and such a chaos +of Bedlam you never dreamed. If it +hadn't been for my just having got religion +that way, I'd have turned around and come +straight back home. But as it was, I +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 275]</span> +didn't have time to do anything but get +into my blue print and take hold right +with her and get some order into things +in general."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Aunt Matilda!" Jane's face was +radiant.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Afternoons Matthew came with an +auto, and he'd take me off with the back +seat full of children, and we'd hunt hard +lines anywhere they looked likely."</p> + +<p class="indent">"And then, of course, we soon got married," +said Mr. Beamer.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes, and that's all," said Matilda. +"<i>Now did you ever?</i>"</p> + +<p class="indent">There was a sudden hush, until finally +Susan said, through tears: "Oh, Matilda,—it's +like something in heaven's got loose +and fell right down over us, isn't it?"</p> + +<p class="indent">"I think it's all too wonderful," said +Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Of course there really is something out +of heaven spread over earth every day," +said Lorenzo, low, and very reverently; +"only people don't see it."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 276]</span> +"But nowadays, everybody's beginning +to recognize it," Jane murmured.</p> + +<p class="indent">"It's like it says in one of my books," +said Mr. Beamer. "God's a reservoir and +we're all pipes, just as soon as we're willing +to be pipes, and then He pours through us +according to how willing we are, because +you're big or little just according to how +willing you are."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Let us all be very willing," said Jane.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Oh, Jane," said Susan, "that sounds +like a blessing to ask at the table. Let's +ask a blessing after this and just say: +'Let us all be very willing!'"</p> + +<p class="indent">"Amen," said Lorenzo.</p> + +<hr class="hr2"/> + +<p><span class="pagenum">[Pg 277]</span></p> + +<h2><a name="XIX" id="XIX"></a>CHAPTER XIX</h2> + +<p class="h2a">THE RESULTS</p> + +<p class="indent">JANE was married in the early autumn.</p> + +<p class="indent">She didn't have any trousseau or any +wedding presents or any bridal trip. It was +a new kind of wedding, because so much +about her and her way of looking at life +was new to those about her, that even her +marriage had to match it. "My clothes +are always in nice order," she said to Susan, +slightly appalled over the non-existing preparations, +"and I love to sew and will +make what I need as I need it."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't want any presents," Lorenzo +had said decidedly. "I don't want any +one on earth to groan because I'm marrying +Jane."</p> + +<p class="indent">"I don't think much of bridal trips; +<span class="pagenum">[Pg 278]</span> +Matthew and I didn't have one, so I know +all about them," said Matilda, who now +had her standard and never lowered it for +one instant; "those bothers are just about +over for sensible people."</p> + +<p class="indent">So it all fell out in this way. One lovely +bright September day, Mr. and Mrs. +Beamer and Mrs. Susan Ralston walked +quietly into the village church and sat +down in the front pew. Shortly after +the clergyman and the bride and the groom +came in, and the clergyman married the +bride to the groom. Then they all went +out together, and the clergyman left them +to go home together. A nice cold luncheon +was spread at Susan's, and the cat was +waiting, scratching hard at his white bow +while he did so.</p> + +<p class="indent">After luncheon Mr. Beamer, his wife, +and his wife's sister went off for a journey.</p> + +<p class="indent">"Think of me traveling!" Susan cried +ecstatically. "Oh, Jane, may you enjoy +going abroad this winter as much as I shall +going off now."</p> + +<p class="indent"><span class="pagenum">[Pg 279]</span> +Jane smiled her pretty smile, and then, +after the last wave of adieu, she and Lorenzo +went back into the house.</p> + +<p class="indent">"This is really very funny, you know," +said Lorenzo; "first we will wash all the +dishes, and then we will plan our future."</p> + +<p class="indent">"Yes," Jane said.</p> + +<p class="indent">But they failed to do either.</p> + +<p class="indent">Instead, they left the dishes and the future +to care for themselves. Going straight +down into the garden, climbing the two +fences, safely secluded in the little, growing, +blooming inclosure, Lorenzo took his wife +in his arms, and said: "Oh, my dearest +dear, how rightest right everything is!"</p> + +<p class="center"><span class="smcap">The End</span></p> + +<hr class="hr2" /> + +<p class="h2">Books by Anne Warner</p> + +<p class="h3a">The Rejuvenation of Aunt Mary</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Players' Edition, with illustrations reproduced from photographs +of scenes in the play. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">Always amusing and ends in a burst of sunshine.—<i>Philadelphia +Ledger.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">Just Between Themselves</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Frontispiece in color by Will Grefé. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">It is full of apt, pert little take-offs on human nature that provokes +frequent chuckles.—<i>Philadelphia Item.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">In A Mysterious Way</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Illustrated by J. V. McFall. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">A story of love and sacrifice that teems with the author's original +humor.—<i>Baltimore American.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">Your Child and Mine</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Illustrated. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">The child-heart, strange and sweet and tender, lies open to this +sympathetic writer.—<i>Chicago Record-Herald.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">An Original Gentleman</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Frontispiece by Alice Barber Stephens. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">Exhibits her cleverness and sense of humor.—<i>New York Times.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">Susan Clegg, Her Friend and Her Neighbors</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Illustrated. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">Combining all the Susan Clegg stories originally published in "Susan +Clegg and Her Friend Mrs. Lathrop" and "Susan Clegg and Her +Neighbors' Affairs."</p> + +<p class="indent">One of the most genuinely humorous books ever written.—<i>St. +Louis Globe-Democrat.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">Susan Clegg And a Man in the House</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Illustrated by Alice Barber Stephens. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">Susan is a positive joy, and the reading world owes Anne Warner a +vote of thanks for her contribution to the list of American humor.—<i>New +York Times.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">When Woman Proposes</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Illustrated in color. <b>$1.25 <i>net</i></b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">Dainty in form and content. It is printed, bound, and illustrated +charmingly, and the story, style, and atmosphere correspond.—<i>New +York Herald</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">A Woman's Will</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Illustrated. <b>$1.50</b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">A deliciously funny book.—<i>Chicago Tribune.</i></p> + +<p class="h3a">How Leslie Loved</p> + +<blockquote> +<p class="indent">Illustrations in color by A. B. Wenzell. <b>$1.25 <i>net</i></b></p> +</blockquote> + +<p class="indent">The sprightly romance of a young and charming American widow.</p> + +<p class="h2">LITTLE, BROWN, & CO., <i>Publishers</i><br /> +34 BEACON STREET, BOSTON</p> + +<hr class="hr2" /> + +<div class="tnote"> + +<p class="h2a">Transcriber's Note:</p> + +<hr /> + +<p class="indent">On page 228, "winable" was replaced with "winnable".</p> + +<p class="indent">On page 242, the comma after "softly" was replaced with a period.</p> + +<p class="indent">On page 245, the period after "cow declared" was replaced with a comma.</p> + +<p class="indent">On page 278, "Mr Beamer" was replaced with "Mr. Beamer".</p> + +<p class="indent">In the advertisements at the end of the book, the duplicate header on the last page was removed.</p> + +</div> + +<p> </p> +<p> </p> +<hr class="full" /> +<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SUNSHINE JANE***</p> +<p>******* This file should be named 37972-h.txt or 37972-h.zip *******</p> +<p>This and all associated files of various formats will be found in:<br /> +<a href="http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/3/7/9/7/37972">http://www.gutenberg.org/3/7/9/7/37972</a></p> +<p>Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed.</p> + +<p>Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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