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+ "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd">
+
+<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en">
+ <head>
+ <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" />
+ <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" />
+ <title>
+ The Project Gutenberg eBook of The World Turned Upside Down., by E. C. Clayton.
+ </title>
+ <style type="text/css">
+
+ p {margin-top: .75em;
+ text-align: justify;
+ text-indent: 1.25em;
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+ padding-left: .5em; padding-right: .5em;}
+ ins {text-decoration:none; border-bottom: thin dotted gray;}
+ h1,h2,h3,h4,h5,h6 {
+ text-align: center; /* all headings centered */
+ clear: both;
+ }
+ hr { margin-top: 2em;
+ margin-bottom: 2em;
+ margin-left: auto;
+ margin-right: auto;
+ clear: both;
+ }
+
+ table {margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;}
+
+ body{margin-left: 10%;
+ margin-right: 10%;
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+
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+ visibility: hidden;
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+ left: 92%;
+ font-size: smaller;
+ text-align: right;
+ } /* page numbers */
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+ padding-left: .5em; padding-right: .5em;}
+ .small {font-size: 70%;}
+ .author {font-size: 120%; text-align: center;}
+ .center {text-align: center;}
+ .smcap {font-variant: small-caps;}
+ .chaptertitle {text-align: center; font-size: 110%; font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 1.5em;}
+
+ .caption {font-weight: bold; font-size: 90%;}
+
+ .figcenter {margin: auto; text-align: center;}
+
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+ margin-top: 1em; margin-right: 0; padding: 0; text-align: center;}
+
+ .unindent {margin-top: .75em;
+ text-align: justify;
+ margin-bottom: .75em;
+ }
+ .poem {margin-left: 30%; text-align: left;}
+ .poem2 {margin-left: 35%; text-align: left;}
+
+ </style>
+ </head>
+<body>
+
+
+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The World Turned Upside Down, by E. C. Clayton
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The World Turned Upside Down
+
+Author: E. C. Clayton
+
+Release Date: September 13, 2011 [EBook #37414]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE WORLD TURNED UPSIDE DOWN ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Emmy, Marilynda Fraser-Cunliffe and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This
+file was produced from images generously made available
+by the University of Florida Digital Collections.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 429px;">
+<img src="images/cover.jpg" width="429" height="600" alt="Cover" title="" />
+</div>
+
+
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 370px;">
+<img src="images/illus_004.jpg" width="370" height="500" alt="Coat's revenge" title="" />
+</div>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<div class='bbox'>
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;">
+<img src="images/illus_005.png" width="500" height="115" alt="Decoration" title="" />
+</div>
+
+<h1><i>THE WORLD TURNED<br />UPSIDE DOWN.</i></h1>
+
+<div class='author'>BY E. C. CLAYTON.</div>
+
+
+<div class='center'><br /><br /><br />
+<span class="smcap">London</span>:<br />
+DEAN &amp; SON, 160<span class="smcap">a</span>, FLEET STREET, E.C.,<br />
+<span class='small'>PUBLISHERS AND CHRISTMAS CARD MANUFACTURERS.</span><br />
+</div></div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="smcap">The Foolish Coat.</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='unindent'><span class="smcap">The</span> Coat was in a downright rage.</div>
+
+<p>"To be beaten, and caned, and cuffed,
+and shaken, two or three times a-day,"
+cried he, whisking his tails about like an
+angry lion, "I say it's a shame."</p>
+
+<p>"If you were not well thrashed," said the
+Cane, "you'd soon get thick with dust,
+and <i>then</i> I'd like to know how you'd look."</p>
+
+<p>"So <i>I</i> say," remarked the Hat.</p>
+
+<p>"It's all very well for you to talk, Mr.
+Cane," said the Coat, still more in a rage.
+"Nobody ever hits you, and if they did,
+you could hit back. And as for you, Mr.
+Hat, nobody ever thinks of punching you,
+except in fun. You have a nice soft
+brush all to yourself."</p>
+
+<p>"Well, are you not brushed as well?"
+asked the Hat.</p>
+
+<p>"I don't mind being brushed," said the
+Coat, "but the next time Mr. Valet comes
+along, and hits me, I'll&mdash;I'll&mdash;" then he
+growled something to himself, whisked
+his tails, and added, "<i>See</i> if I don't."</p>
+
+<p>In came the Valet, and bustled about.
+The Coat eyed him, and when he came
+close, caught him up with <i>such</i> a clutch.</p>
+
+<p>"Hallo, hallo, hallo!" cried the Valet.
+"What are you doing?"</p>
+
+<p>But the Coat hung the Valet on a
+nail, and snatched up the Cane.</p>
+
+<p>"Now, look here, Mister Valet," said
+he. "I'm not going to be dusted and
+beaten and thumped. I'm just going to
+show you what it feels like, Mister Valet."</p>
+
+<p>"What are you talking about, you
+stupid old Coat?" said the Valet.</p>
+
+<p>"I'll let you see," said the Coat, flourishing
+the Cane.</p>
+
+<p>The Cane could not help himself, for
+he was thin.</p>
+
+<p>Thump, thump, thump, went the Coat,
+blowing out such clouds and clouds of
+dust from the Valet's clothes, never
+remembering he was covering himself
+with dust, and making himself look
+shockingly shabby. The Valet called out
+as loud as he could for help, but nobody
+heard him, and the Coat kept on thumping
+till his sleeves fairly ached. Then he
+dropped the Cane, fell on the dirty floor,
+and whisked his tails with great satisfaction.</p>
+
+<p>The Cane jumped up, and lifted down
+the Valet, who went off to his own room.</p>
+
+<p>A few days after, the master came in,
+and looked at the Coat, which he had
+meant to wear at a jolly garden party.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh," said he, "how dreadfully shabby
+that Coat looks."</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, sir," said the Valet, "he won't
+allow himself to be brushed or dusted."</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, won't he?" said the Master,
+"that's all very fine, but it won't do for me."
+So he seized the Cane, and gave the Coat
+one good thump. But such a cloud of
+dust came out of the Coat that the Master
+threw down the Cane, and ran to the door.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh," cried he, "I can't wear that
+frightful old thing any more. It is
+disgracefully shabby and dusty. Sell it
+to the first 'ole clo'' man that comes
+along." But he took the Hat, and went
+to the nice party.</p>
+
+<p>And what do you think became of
+this foolish Coat? Why, he was hung on
+a stick in a field to make a scare-crow.
+And serve him right, a stupid thing.</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<h2><span class="smcap">Alf and the Parrot.</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='poem'>
+The old Poll Parrot was in a rage;<br />
+He bounced and spluttered about in his cage.<br />
+<br />
+The reason he felt so much displeased<br />
+Was because young Alf had worried and teased.<br />
+<br />
+He pecked, and bobbed, and knocked with his beak,<br />
+Too much enraged to be able to speak.<br />
+<br />
+To tease him was a scandalous shame:<br />
+Alf was a bad boy, and much to blame.<br />
+<br />
+"I tell you, young Alf," at last Poll said,<br />
+"If you don't leave off, I'll snap off your head.<br />
+<br />
+"You think you're allowed to tease a bird.<br />
+Now, that idea's extremely absurd.<br />
+<br />
+"One thing, young Alf, is certain and sure&mdash;<br />
+Your worry and bother no more I'll endure.<br />
+<br />
+"Another thing, Alf, is also clear:<br />
+I mean to walk out, and lock you in here."<br />
+<br />
+Poor Alfy screamed and bawled with rage<br />
+When Poll marched out, and put <i>him</i> in the cage!<br />
+<br />
+Cried Alf, "I think this horrible bird<br />
+Is going to be as good as his word."<br />
+<br />
+Laughed old Poll, as he perched on a chair,<br />
+"You thought to punish you I'd never dare.<br />
+<br />
+"You may bawl or howl, or scream and rage&mdash;<br />
+I'm going to lock the door of the cage!"<br />
+<br />
+Alfy did cry out&mdash;Oh! didn't he shout,<br />
+When he found the Parrot would not let him out!<br />
+<br />
+Said Poll, "My dear boy, it's now <i>our</i> turn;<br />
+The world's upside down, as you have to learn."<br />
+<br />
+So Alf was forced to make up his mind<br />
+In the cage of the Parrot to be confined.<br />
+</div>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 368px;">
+<img src="images/illus_012.jpg" width="368" height="500" alt="Child in cage bird out of cage" title="" />
+</div>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<h2><span class="smcap">The Clever Hare.</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='unindent'>"<span class="smcap">To</span> be hunted, and trapped, and watched
+for by night, and&mdash;and&mdash;I don't know
+what, is most abominable!" said the Hare.</div>
+
+<p>Some dogs had frightened him, and he
+had run&mdash;run like a hare, in fact, and then
+sat down upon his form to think. The
+dogs had not stood upon ceremony, so he
+didn't choose to stand upon forms, but sat
+down comfortably.</p>
+
+<p>He twitched his ears, and scratched his
+wig, and thought.</p>
+
+<p>"And I won't put up with it&mdash;<i>there</i>,"
+said he, aloud. "It's only cowardice
+putting up with things. I'll get some
+fellows to help me, and we'll hunt the
+dogs."</p>
+
+<p>At that moment he heard a sound.</p>
+
+<p>"Wow! bow, wow, wow!" barked
+some dog, a little way off.</p>
+
+<p>The Hare jumped up again, and flew
+off as quick as his legs would carry him.
+After running some distance, he sat down
+again, but this time he found neither forms
+nor ceremonies.</p>
+
+<p>But he found something that was better.
+A gun and a sportsman's bag were lying
+near, and he eyed them.</p>
+
+<p>"I wonder if that gun would go off if I
+touched it!" he said to himself.</p>
+
+<p>He walked round and round it, and
+then cautiously pawed it. No: it
+didn't seem to have the least idea of
+going off.</p>
+
+<p>Then he lifted it up, and grew quite
+bold.</p>
+
+<p>"I wonder if I could shoot anything?"
+thought he.</p>
+
+<p>He aimed at a bird, and brought it
+down.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 375px;">
+<img src="images/illus_015.jpg" width="375" height="500" alt="Hare shooting a rifle" title="" />
+</div>
+
+<p>"Bravo, bravo, bravo!" cried he. "I'll
+take this gun, and then if anybody tries to
+torment or to catch me, I'll&mdash;I'll kill them."</p>
+
+<p>He hung the bag round his waist, and
+put the gun on his shoulder, then walked
+off to his home. On the way, a boy ran
+at him, and cried "Bo!" but he just
+pointed the gun, and the boy ran away.</p>
+
+<p>The Hare lived all by himself, but he
+was very comfortable. Nobody could
+bother him, and he would have been quite
+content only for the men and the dogs.</p>
+
+<p>Every day he practised with his gun till
+he got to be very skilful.</p>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"Just let them come along<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">And they shall all soon see,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">That they're all in the wrong</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">To plague and bother me.</span><br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Although I'm but a hare,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">I think I'm very smart,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">And can&mdash;let them beware&mdash;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">Right well take my own part."</span><br />
+</div>
+
+<p>So he sang, as he sat one day polishing
+up his gun.</p>
+
+<p>As he was busily at work, he heard a
+noise, and cocked his ear. Tramp, tramp,
+tramp, came along some one&mdash;a man.
+It was a poacher, who said to himself he
+was going to catch a fine fat Hare. The
+man cast an eye round, but the Hare hid,
+and watched.</p>
+
+<p>Then the man stole nearer, and peeped
+round a tree.</p>
+
+<p>"Aha!" said the Hare. "You want
+to catch me, and eat me, don't you? But
+I am going to catch you, and boil you for
+my supper."</p>
+
+<p>The man only laughed, for it was preposterous
+the idea of a Hare catching a
+man, instead of a man catching a hare.</p>
+
+<p>And the Hare just cocked his gun, put
+it to his shoulder, and fired. Then he
+did kill the poacher, and took him home,
+and stewed him with mushrooms for
+supper.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 200px;">
+<img src="images/illus_017.png" width="200" height="93" alt="Decoration: flowers" title="" />
+</div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<h2><span class="smcap">the</span><br />
+<span class="smcap">Strong Man and the Invalid</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='unindent'>"<span class="smcap">Where's</span> the good of going on grumble,
+grumble, grumble, all the day long?" said
+the strong Man to the Invalid. "Why,
+you get petted and have extra nice things
+to eat, beautiful bunches of grapes, and
+boiled chickens, and I don't know what."</div>
+
+<p>"If you were <i>me</i>, you would not talk
+like that," said the Invalid, in a poor sick
+weak voice. "I'd eat dry bread, and never
+ask to be petted at all if I were strong,
+like you."</p>
+
+<p>The Strong Man laughed, as if he
+didn't believe the Invalid.</p>
+
+<p>"I have to work hard all day, and nobody
+seems to care a bit whether I'm tired
+or not," said he. "But if you only have a
+finger ache, everybody is running about
+trying to find something to do you good.
+And they come and read to you, and
+bring you flowers, and&mdash;and&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>"You just take my place for a day or
+two, and see how you'd like it," said the
+Invalid.</p>
+
+<p>"Um&mdash;well, I shouldn't like to be ill,
+you know," said the Strong Man. "I
+shouldn't like to lie in bed, nor have the
+doctor coming to see me, because he'd
+give me nasty stuff to take."</p>
+
+<p>"I'll be your doctor," said the Invalid.
+"But you must lie in bed. Come, take
+my place."</p>
+
+<p>The Strong Man was ashamed to
+refuse.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, now you are comfortable, I
+suppose," said the Invalid, tucking him in.
+"You must try to doze a little."</p>
+
+<div class="figleft" style="width: 365px;">
+<img src="images/illus_020.jpg" width="365" height="500" alt="Lith. Emrik &amp; Binger, Haarlem." title="" />
+</div>
+
+<p>"But I'm not sleepy," said the Strong
+Man.</p>
+
+<p>"You'll soon be tired, and go to sleep,"
+said the Invalid. "I'm going away, but
+shall be back in an hour or two."</p>
+
+<p>When he went away, the place seemed
+dreadfully dull. Not a sound was to be
+heard except the barking of a dog in a
+farm-yard near, and the cluck cluck of
+some hens.</p>
+
+<p>"Dear, dear," said the Strong Man,
+"this is very tiresome."</p>
+
+<p>Presently an old lady looked in.</p>
+
+<p>"Poor dear, poor dear," said she, "I
+will read a nice book to you."</p>
+
+<p>So she sat down and read out of a book.
+But the Strong Man didn't care about the
+book, and he thought the old lady stupid.</p>
+
+<p>Then she went away, and by-and-by,
+a kind old gentleman came in with some
+chicken, and a glass of wine, and some
+beautiful white bread.</p>
+
+<p>"Here," said he, "Take this, it will
+do you good."</p>
+
+<p>But the Strong Man didn't feel hungry,
+and he was tired and cross by this time,
+so he wouldn't have any of it. Then some
+more people came in, and talked to him,
+and told him the Invalid had gone to see
+the reapers, and tried to be kind to him.
+Then at last everybody stole away on
+tiptoe, and left him alone.</p>
+
+<p>Then the Invalid came back. But by
+that time the Strong Man had had quite
+enough of being shut up in a sick room, so
+he jumped up, and ran to the door.</p>
+
+<p>"I see you are not much to be envied,"
+said he to the Invalid. "I don't think I
+shall ever envy anybody again so long
+as I have health and strength."</p>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<h2><span class="smcap">The Kite's Little Game</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='unindent'><span class="smcap">The</span> Kite laughed and chuckled to
+himself until his paper fairly crackled.</div>
+
+<p>"We shall have such a game," said he
+to his paper Tails.</p>
+
+<p>"We mostly do," squeaked the Tails.</p>
+
+<p>There were eighteen of them, and they
+were all very frisky.</p>
+
+<p>The Kite first winked one eye, then
+the other, then winked both together.</p>
+
+<p>I'm afraid he was rather a vulgar sort of
+a Kite, but he was very jolly. His eyes
+were inclined to be goggly, yellow round
+the outside, with red in the middle. He
+was not a particularly good-looking Kite&mdash;in
+fact, he was really ugly&mdash;but he
+was very funny, and loved a joke.</p>
+
+<p>The string suddenly wakened up out of
+a nap, hearing talk going on, "Eh, what's
+that?" said he.</p>
+
+<p>"Don't know," said the Tails.</p>
+
+<p>The Kite laughed again, and shook his
+round ears, and showed all his teeth in
+one wide grin. "We'll have a game this
+afternoon," said he, once more.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh," said the String. "We mostly do."</p>
+
+<p>The Kite stuck up his pointed chin, and
+shook his red paper beard. "I mean a
+different sort of game to what <i>you</i> mean,"
+said he. "You mean, we have a game when
+young Walter takes us out. But I don't
+mean <i>that</i>."</p>
+
+<p>"Then what <i>do</i> you mean?" said the
+String, who didn't care about guessing.</p>
+
+<p>"When he takes us out, we have to
+go where <i>he</i> likes, and fly when he chooses
+us to fly," said the Kite. "Now <i>I</i> mean,
+we'll fly young Walter."</p>
+
+<p>"Eh?" said the String.</p>
+
+<div class="figright" style="width: 379px;">
+<img src="images/illus_025.jpg" width="379" height="500" alt="Kite flying a boy" title="" />
+</div>
+
+<p>The String was rather sleepy-headed,
+and didn't take in new ideas very quickly.
+He was so astonished now that he unrolled
+himself several yards, and wriggled about
+round the Kite, to look at him, as if he
+must be out of his mind.</p>
+
+<p>"Eh?" said all the Tails, after a flutter
+of surprise. But they thought it was a
+joke, and that the Kite only meant to be
+funny. The Kite straightened himself,
+and looked very important. "When I
+say a thing, I mean it," said he, in a
+dignified manner.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, but&mdash;" said one Tail, timidly.</p>
+
+<p>"<i>Well</i>, but what?" snapped the Kite.
+"You don't know what you're talking
+about. I say we'll fly&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>At that minute up came Walter. He
+took hold of the Kite, and was winding
+up the String, when the Kite said&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>"Master Walter, let's fly <i>you</i> to day!"</p>
+
+<p>Walter stared and laughed.</p>
+
+<p>"You couldn't," said he. "You're only
+made of paper."</p>
+
+<p>"Let us try," said the Kite.</p>
+
+<p>"I mustn't go far, then," said Walter,
+"because my mother would wonder where
+I was."</p>
+
+<p>So the String was tied about Walter,
+and up he flew. It was very jolly, and he
+flew here and there like a bird. The Kite
+and the String were delighted, and the
+Tails kept on a chatter, chatter, chatter,
+like eighteen little magpies all in a row.
+But the Kite found it hard work after a
+time. He had to mind the string, and
+watch lest Walter should tumble down, and
+keep on doing this and doing that, instead
+of pleasantly fluttering about. He got
+cross and grumpy at last. "I think the
+old way's the best," said he. "Next time
+I'll go up. Old ways are best, after all."</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 220px;">
+<img src="images/illus_027.png" width="220" height="91" alt="decoration" title="" />
+</div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<h2><span class="smcap">The Birds and the Fishes.</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='poem2'>
+I think you will own<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That it is very rare</span><br />
+To see fishes and frogs<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Sail about in the air,</span><br />
+<br />
+While the birds and the poultry<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Are swimming about</span><br />
+Like so many mackerel<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or pikes, sprats, or trout,</span><br />
+<br />
+In old times, the fishes,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And birds, were content</span><br />
+To remain all their lives<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In their <i>own</i> element.</span><br />
+<br />
+Things are different now:<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They have changed the old times,</span><br />
+Turned the world topsy-turvy,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With no reasons or rhymes.</span><br />
+<br />
+But I think you'll agree<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It is simply absurd</span><br />
+For a fish to pretend<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He is just like a bird.</span><br />
+<br />
+But for birds to be fishes<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is really as bad:</span><br />
+One would fancy they all<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Had surely gone mad.</span><br />
+<br />
+For fishes cold water,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For birds a warm nest,</span><br />
+Of all places, truly,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is <i>the</i> very best.</span><br />
+</div>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 200px;">
+<img src="images/illus_037.png" width="200" height="98" alt="Decoration: flowers" title="" />
+</div><hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 377px;">
+<img src="images/illus_030.jpg" width="377" height="500" alt="Birds in the water, fish in the air" title="" />
+</div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<h2><span class="smcap">The Wonderful Show.</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='unindent'><span class="smcap">One</span> fine summer's afternoon, the Lion
+went trotting home in high good humour.
+As he went along, he kept muttering and
+grinning to himself, as if mightily pleased.
+When he got home, he banged at the door
+of his den with his tail. A Lion's tail is
+very strong and hard, you know, stronger
+and harder than any bell rope. The
+Lioness, his wife, was out at the back,
+combing out the manes of her young
+Lions, but presently she came and opened
+the door.</div>
+
+<p>"My dear," cried the Lion, "<i>such</i> a
+piece of news!"</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, indeed?" said the Lioness.
+"Have you found some travellers to eat?"</p>
+
+<p>"Better than <i>that</i>," said the Lion, all
+a-glow, rubbing his paws.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, in-<i>deed</i>," said the Lioness, smiling.
+"Then it must be very good indeed."</p>
+
+<p>"Yes," said the Lion. "Just guess, my
+love."</p>
+
+<p>"How <i>can</i> I guess? I never was good
+at guessing. Besides, you could tell me
+quicker than I could guess," said the
+Lion's wife.</p>
+
+<p>"How clever you are," said the Lion,
+putting his tawny head on one side, and
+looking admiringly at his queen. "Perhaps
+telling <i>is</i> the quickest way after all.
+Well&mdash;" Then he stopped, as if to tantalize.</p>
+
+<p>"Well&mdash;what? How tiresome you are,"
+said the Lioness.</p>
+
+<p>"They have brought a cageful of humans
+to the town, and all the Beasts and all the
+Birds are going to see the show."</p>
+
+<p>"<i>What!</i>" cried the Lioness, so astonished
+that she could hardly believe her ears.</p>
+
+<p>The Lion skipped right round the
+parlour three times, snapping his claws like
+castanets. "Yes," said he, gleefully, "they
+used to lock <i>us</i> up, and let people pay to see
+us, and call us Wild Beasts, and Carnivora,
+and all sorts of ugly names. But times are
+changed. I wonder how they'll like it?
+We'll take our little beasts of children to
+see the show."</p>
+
+<p>"You <i>shouldn't</i> call the little ducks
+Beasts," said the Lioness. "I wonder you
+don't call them a parcel of Cubs."</p>
+
+<p>"Well, they <i>are</i> Beasts and Cubs, ain't
+they?" said the Lion.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, never mind, I won't have them
+spoken of like that," said his wife. "When
+will you take me and the darling pets to
+see this wonderful show?"</p>
+
+<p>"Come now," said the Lion, jingling
+his money in the purse he carried in the
+end of his tail.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, I'm not dressed," said the Lioness.</p>
+
+<p>"You never are," said the Lion.</p>
+
+<p>"That's true," said his wife. "Well,
+here! children! come along and see the
+Tame Humans."</p>
+
+<p>The young cubs came rolling in, all
+tumbling over one another, like jolly little
+brutes as they were, and set up a wild roar
+of delight at hearing they were going out
+for the day. When they got half way, the
+Lion suddenly stopped and considered.</p>
+
+<p>"I think," said he, "as we are going to
+change places with the humans, we ought
+to have all the fine things they used to
+have, so we'll buy some clothes."</p>
+
+<p>"All right, my dear," said the Lioness.</p>
+
+<div class="figleft" style="width: 368px;">
+<img src="images/illus_035.jpg" width="368" height="500" alt="People in the zoo" title="" />
+</div>
+
+<p>So they went into a shop, which they
+found belonged to a very civil elephant.
+They were quickly fitted out with nice
+suits, and then trotted contentedly on. A
+large crowd of beasts and birds was going
+the same way, and at the door it was hard
+to get in. The greatest excitement prevailed&mdash;which
+means, you know, that
+people&mdash;animals, I mean&mdash;were laughing
+and talking, and wondering, and squeezing,
+and pushing, and treading on one another's
+toes, and saying "Where are you shoving
+to?" and "There's plenty of room," and
+"Don't be disagreeable," and "Don't lose
+your temper, pray," and asking questions,
+and all that kind of thing. The Lion and
+his wife were afraid to take in the children,
+so left them outside with an old Cow, who
+was herself <ins title="Transcriber's Note: This word not present in original text">too</ins> frightened to venture, and too
+fat to squeeze through the throng. Inside,
+the animals were all staring their hardest.
+The humans in the cages didn't at all
+relish being shown, and were very cross.
+A Wolf with a long stick was telling about
+all their ways, and poking them up to make
+them roar. One young man in a blue
+coat howled with rage, until a good-natured
+old Rhinoceros, with a red shawl,
+threw him a bun. He was so ungrateful as
+to kick it out of his cage, which offended
+the old Rhinoceros, as you may imagine.</p>
+
+<p>"Times are changed, ain't they?" said
+a jolly old Bear to the Lion, chuckling.</p>
+
+<p>"Quite time too," answered the Lion.</p>
+
+<p>The Ostrich craned his long neck, and
+stared as hard as he could, as did all the
+animals. The Lioness was very well
+pleased, but she hurried out to see after
+her children, while the Lion stayed to have
+a good look. In fact, there never had been
+such a sight seen in Beastland before, and
+I don't suppose there ever will be such a
+one again.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 200px;">
+<img src="images/illus_037.png" width="200" height="98" alt="Decoration: flowers" title="" />
+</div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<h2><span class="smcap">The Unkind Trees.</span></h2>
+
+
+<div class='unindent'>"<span class="smcap">You</span> know it's ridiculous, and we
+mustn't put up with it any longer," said
+the Plane Tree. He wasn't called the
+Plane Tree because he was not good looking,
+but because he always spoke his mind.</div>
+
+<p>"That's what <i>I</i> say," grumbled the Elm.</p>
+
+<p>"To be sure," cried the Oak, in a deep,
+deep, deep voice&mdash;you would have fancied
+it came out of his boots. But I forgot:
+of course Oaks don't wear boots&mdash;but that
+does not signify.</p>
+
+<p>The Aspen and the Sycamore sighed,
+and shook their leaves, and looked wise.</p>
+
+<p>The <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'Chesnut'">Chestnut</ins> and the Beech whispered
+to one another, and waved their boughs
+indignantly.</p>
+
+<p>"Yes," said the Poplar, a tall, straight,
+stiff tree, with a squeaky voice, "I <i>do</i>
+think it's a shame the Wood-cutters should
+be allowed to come here and cut us up
+whenever they choose. The Government,
+or the Parish, or the Local Authorities,
+or&mdash;or&mdash;<i>somebody</i>, ought to hinder them."</p>
+
+<p>"Everybody encourages them to do it,"
+said the Box Tree, angrily. The Box
+Tree was rather fond of fighting, and that's
+how he came by his name.</p>
+
+<p>"I know what we ought to do," said
+the Birch, "Whip them."</p>
+
+<p>"Chop them up," cried the Plane Tree,
+who was fond of carpentry.</p>
+
+<p>The trees all fluttered their leaves.
+They were rather frightened at the ideas
+of the Birch and Plane.</p>
+
+<p>"Well," growled the Oak. But he
+couldn't think of anything to say, so was
+obliged to stop.</p>
+
+<p>The Ivy had not said a word, but
+listened to everything. Now she lifted up
+her head, and spoke&mdash;so softly that it
+seemed as if the summer wind was rustling
+through her leaves.</p>
+
+<div class="figright" style="width: 372px;">
+<img src="images/illus_040.png" width="372" height="500" alt="Man on sawhorses" title="" />
+</div>
+
+<p>"I think," said the gentle Ivy&mdash;and
+though she spoke so sweetly, her voice
+could be heard by every tree&mdash;"I think
+when there are so many branches to spare,
+and when it is an improvement to the
+trees to be lopped and pruned a little bit,
+it is foolish to object. And when we know
+the poor wood-cutters make their living by
+cutting wood in the forest, and when poor
+children are often shivering in the winter
+for want of fire, it is selfish to grumble
+about a few fagots of wood."</p>
+
+<p>There was a deep stillness. Not a
+word did any tree speak, till the Elm said,
+with a bit of a sneer, "Ivy does not know
+what she is talking about."</p>
+
+<p>"She means well," said the Cedar, "but
+she does talk nonsense." "So she does,"
+murmured some other trees.</p>
+
+<p>Ivy hung her head, and heard with
+grief and displeasure that the very next
+wood-cutter who came through the forest
+should be chopped up, as an example. In
+the afternoon, Hans came along, singing
+gaily to himself. He looked about, and
+noticed some branches that might be cut
+off without spoiling the trees, for he loved
+the trees, and would not have hurt them
+for the world. But as he laid down his
+saw on his wooden horse, it was snatched
+by the Birch with its long arms, and he
+felt himself whipped up.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, oh, oh," cried Hans.</p>
+
+<p>"Ho, ho, ho," cried the trees, maliciously.</p>
+
+<p>Ivy covered herself with her own leaves,
+for she could <ins title="Transcriber's Note: This word not present in original text">not</ins> bear to see so sad a sight,
+and she cried. So Hans was cut up, and
+his poor children had nobody to earn any
+money to buy them food, for their mother
+was dead. And the wood-cutters were
+afraid to come near the forest, lest they
+should be served like Hans. And what
+happened? Why, there was nobody to
+prune the trees, and they grew so thick
+that their branches all got entangled and
+twisted, and they smothered one another.</p>
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<div class='tnote'><h3>Transcriber's Notes:</h3>
+<p>Obvious punctuation errors repaired.</p>
+
+<p>The remaining corrections made are indicated by dotted lines under the corrections. Scroll the mouse over the word and the original text will <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'apprear'">appear</ins>.</p></div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's The World Turned Upside Down, by E. C. Clayton
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+</pre>
+
+</body>
+</html>
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