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diff --git a/37414-h/37414-h.htm b/37414-h/37414-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..83f6c57 --- /dev/null +++ b/37414-h/37414-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,1375 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> + +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> + <head> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" /> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> + <title> + The Project Gutenberg eBook of The World Turned Upside Down., by E. C. Clayton. + </title> + <style type="text/css"> + + p {margin-top: .75em; + text-align: justify; + text-indent: 1.25em; + margin-bottom: .75em; + } + img {border: 0;} + .tnote {border: dashed 1px; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; padding-bottom: .5em; padding-top: .5em; + padding-left: .5em; padding-right: .5em;} + ins {text-decoration:none; border-bottom: thin dotted gray;} + h1,h2,h3,h4,h5,h6 { + text-align: center; /* all headings centered */ + clear: both; + } + hr { margin-top: 2em; + margin-bottom: 2em; + margin-left: auto; + margin-right: auto; + clear: both; + } + + table {margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;} + + body{margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + } + + .pagenum { /* uncomment the next line for invisible page numbers */ + visibility: hidden; + position: absolute; + left: 92%; + font-size: smaller; + text-align: right; + } /* page numbers */ + .copyright {text-align: center; font-size: 70%;} + .blockquot{margin-left: 5%; margin-right: 10%; text-align: justify;} + + .bbox {border: solid 2px; margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; padding-bottom: .5em; padding-top: .5em; + padding-left: .5em; padding-right: .5em;} + .small {font-size: 70%;} + .author {font-size: 120%; text-align: center;} + .center {text-align: center;} + .smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} + .chaptertitle {text-align: center; font-size: 110%; font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 1.5em;} + + .caption {font-weight: bold; font-size: 90%;} + + .figcenter {margin: auto; text-align: center;} + + .figleft {float: left; clear: left; margin-left: 0; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: + 1em; margin-right: 1em; padding: 0; text-align: center;} + + .figright {float: right; clear: right; margin-left: 1em; margin-bottom: 1em; + margin-top: 1em; margin-right: 0; padding: 0; text-align: center;} + + .unindent {margin-top: .75em; + text-align: justify; + margin-bottom: .75em; + } + .poem {margin-left: 30%; text-align: left;} + .poem2 {margin-left: 35%; text-align: left;} + + </style> + </head> +<body> + + +<pre> + +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The World Turned Upside Down, by E. C. Clayton + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The World Turned Upside Down + +Author: E. C. Clayton + +Release Date: September 13, 2011 [EBook #37414] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE WORLD TURNED UPSIDE DOWN *** + + + + +Produced by Emmy, Marilynda Fraser-Cunliffe and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by the University of Florida Digital Collections.) + + + + + + +</pre> + + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 429px;"> +<img src="images/cover.jpg" width="429" height="600" alt="Cover" title="" /> +</div> + + + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 370px;"> +<img src="images/illus_004.jpg" width="370" height="500" alt="Coat's revenge" title="" /> +</div> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<div class='bbox'> +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;"> +<img src="images/illus_005.png" width="500" height="115" alt="Decoration" title="" /> +</div> + +<h1><i>THE WORLD TURNED<br />UPSIDE DOWN.</i></h1> + +<div class='author'>BY E. C. CLAYTON.</div> + + +<div class='center'><br /><br /><br /> +<span class="smcap">London</span>:<br /> +DEAN & SON, 160<span class="smcap">a</span>, FLEET STREET, E.C.,<br /> +<span class='small'>PUBLISHERS AND CHRISTMAS CARD MANUFACTURERS.</span><br /> +</div></div> + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + + + + +<h2><span class="smcap">The Foolish Coat.</span></h2> + + +<div class='unindent'><span class="smcap">The</span> Coat was in a downright rage.</div> + +<p>"To be beaten, and caned, and cuffed, +and shaken, two or three times a-day," +cried he, whisking his tails about like an +angry lion, "I say it's a shame."</p> + +<p>"If you were not well thrashed," said the +Cane, "you'd soon get thick with dust, +and <i>then</i> I'd like to know how you'd look."</p> + +<p>"So <i>I</i> say," remarked the Hat.</p> + +<p>"It's all very well for you to talk, Mr. +Cane," said the Coat, still more in a rage. +"Nobody ever hits you, and if they did, +you could hit back. And as for you, Mr. +Hat, nobody ever thinks of punching you, +except in fun. You have a nice soft +brush all to yourself."</p> + +<p>"Well, are you not brushed as well?" +asked the Hat.</p> + +<p>"I don't mind being brushed," said the +Coat, "but the next time Mr. Valet comes +along, and hits me, I'll—I'll—" then he +growled something to himself, whisked +his tails, and added, "<i>See</i> if I don't."</p> + +<p>In came the Valet, and bustled about. +The Coat eyed him, and when he came +close, caught him up with <i>such</i> a clutch.</p> + +<p>"Hallo, hallo, hallo!" cried the Valet. +"What are you doing?"</p> + +<p>But the Coat hung the Valet on a +nail, and snatched up the Cane.</p> + +<p>"Now, look here, Mister Valet," said +he. "I'm not going to be dusted and +beaten and thumped. I'm just going to +show you what it feels like, Mister Valet."</p> + +<p>"What are you talking about, you +stupid old Coat?" said the Valet.</p> + +<p>"I'll let you see," said the Coat, flourishing +the Cane.</p> + +<p>The Cane could not help himself, for +he was thin.</p> + +<p>Thump, thump, thump, went the Coat, +blowing out such clouds and clouds of +dust from the Valet's clothes, never +remembering he was covering himself +with dust, and making himself look +shockingly shabby. The Valet called out +as loud as he could for help, but nobody +heard him, and the Coat kept on thumping +till his sleeves fairly ached. Then he +dropped the Cane, fell on the dirty floor, +and whisked his tails with great satisfaction.</p> + +<p>The Cane jumped up, and lifted down +the Valet, who went off to his own room.</p> + +<p>A few days after, the master came in, +and looked at the Coat, which he had +meant to wear at a jolly garden party.</p> + +<p>"Oh," said he, "how dreadfully shabby +that Coat looks."</p> + +<p>"Yes, sir," said the Valet, "he won't +allow himself to be brushed or dusted."</p> + +<p>"Oh, won't he?" said the Master, +"that's all very fine, but it won't do for me." +So he seized the Cane, and gave the Coat +one good thump. But such a cloud of +dust came out of the Coat that the Master +threw down the Cane, and ran to the door.</p> + +<p>"Oh," cried he, "I can't wear that +frightful old thing any more. It is +disgracefully shabby and dusty. Sell it +to the first 'ole clo'' man that comes +along." But he took the Hat, and went +to the nice party.</p> + +<p>And what do you think became of +this foolish Coat? Why, he was hung on +a stick in a field to make a scare-crow. +And serve him right, a stupid thing.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><span class="smcap">Alf and the Parrot.</span></h2> + + +<div class='poem'> +The old Poll Parrot was in a rage;<br /> +He bounced and spluttered about in his cage.<br /> +<br /> +The reason he felt so much displeased<br /> +Was because young Alf had worried and teased.<br /> +<br /> +He pecked, and bobbed, and knocked with his beak,<br /> +Too much enraged to be able to speak.<br /> +<br /> +To tease him was a scandalous shame:<br /> +Alf was a bad boy, and much to blame.<br /> +<br /> +"I tell you, young Alf," at last Poll said,<br /> +"If you don't leave off, I'll snap off your head.<br /> +<br /> +"You think you're allowed to tease a bird.<br /> +Now, that idea's extremely absurd.<br /> +<br /> +"One thing, young Alf, is certain and sure—<br /> +Your worry and bother no more I'll endure.<br /> +<br /> +"Another thing, Alf, is also clear:<br /> +I mean to walk out, and lock you in here."<br /> +<br /> +Poor Alfy screamed and bawled with rage<br /> +When Poll marched out, and put <i>him</i> in the cage!<br /> +<br /> +Cried Alf, "I think this horrible bird<br /> +Is going to be as good as his word."<br /> +<br /> +Laughed old Poll, as he perched on a chair,<br /> +"You thought to punish you I'd never dare.<br /> +<br /> +"You may bawl or howl, or scream and rage—<br /> +I'm going to lock the door of the cage!"<br /> +<br /> +Alfy did cry out—Oh! didn't he shout,<br /> +When he found the Parrot would not let him out!<br /> +<br /> +Said Poll, "My dear boy, it's now <i>our</i> turn;<br /> +The world's upside down, as you have to learn."<br /> +<br /> +So Alf was forced to make up his mind<br /> +In the cage of the Parrot to be confined.<br /> +</div> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 368px;"> +<img src="images/illus_012.jpg" width="368" height="500" alt="Child in cage bird out of cage" title="" /> +</div> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><span class="smcap">The Clever Hare.</span></h2> + + +<div class='unindent'>"<span class="smcap">To</span> be hunted, and trapped, and watched +for by night, and—and—I don't know +what, is most abominable!" said the Hare.</div> + +<p>Some dogs had frightened him, and he +had run—run like a hare, in fact, and then +sat down upon his form to think. The +dogs had not stood upon ceremony, so he +didn't choose to stand upon forms, but sat +down comfortably.</p> + +<p>He twitched his ears, and scratched his +wig, and thought.</p> + +<p>"And I won't put up with it—<i>there</i>," +said he, aloud. "It's only cowardice +putting up with things. I'll get some +fellows to help me, and we'll hunt the +dogs."</p> + +<p>At that moment he heard a sound.</p> + +<p>"Wow! bow, wow, wow!" barked +some dog, a little way off.</p> + +<p>The Hare jumped up again, and flew +off as quick as his legs would carry him. +After running some distance, he sat down +again, but this time he found neither forms +nor ceremonies.</p> + +<p>But he found something that was better. +A gun and a sportsman's bag were lying +near, and he eyed them.</p> + +<p>"I wonder if that gun would go off if I +touched it!" he said to himself.</p> + +<p>He walked round and round it, and +then cautiously pawed it. No: it +didn't seem to have the least idea of +going off.</p> + +<p>Then he lifted it up, and grew quite +bold.</p> + +<p>"I wonder if I could shoot anything?" +thought he.</p> + +<p>He aimed at a bird, and brought it +down.</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 375px;"> +<img src="images/illus_015.jpg" width="375" height="500" alt="Hare shooting a rifle" title="" /> +</div> + +<p>"Bravo, bravo, bravo!" cried he. "I'll +take this gun, and then if anybody tries to +torment or to catch me, I'll—I'll kill them."</p> + +<p>He hung the bag round his waist, and +put the gun on his shoulder, then walked +off to his home. On the way, a boy ran +at him, and cried "Bo!" but he just +pointed the gun, and the boy ran away.</p> + +<p>The Hare lived all by himself, but he +was very comfortable. Nobody could +bother him, and he would have been quite +content only for the men and the dogs.</p> + +<p>Every day he practised with his gun till +he got to be very skilful.</p> + +<div class='poem'> +"Just let them come along<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">And they shall all soon see,</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">That they're all in the wrong</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">To plague and bother me.</span><br /> +<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Although I'm but a hare,</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">I think I'm very smart,</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">And can—let them beware—</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">Right well take my own part."</span><br /> +</div> + +<p>So he sang, as he sat one day polishing +up his gun.</p> + +<p>As he was busily at work, he heard a +noise, and cocked his ear. Tramp, tramp, +tramp, came along some one—a man. +It was a poacher, who said to himself he +was going to catch a fine fat Hare. The +man cast an eye round, but the Hare hid, +and watched.</p> + +<p>Then the man stole nearer, and peeped +round a tree.</p> + +<p>"Aha!" said the Hare. "You want +to catch me, and eat me, don't you? But +I am going to catch you, and boil you for +my supper."</p> + +<p>The man only laughed, for it was preposterous +the idea of a Hare catching a +man, instead of a man catching a hare.</p> + +<p>And the Hare just cocked his gun, put +it to his shoulder, and fired. Then he +did kill the poacher, and took him home, +and stewed him with mushrooms for +supper.</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 200px;"> +<img src="images/illus_017.png" width="200" height="93" alt="Decoration: flowers" title="" /> +</div> + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<h2><span class="smcap">the</span><br /> +<span class="smcap">Strong Man and the Invalid</span></h2> + + +<div class='unindent'>"<span class="smcap">Where's</span> the good of going on grumble, +grumble, grumble, all the day long?" said +the strong Man to the Invalid. "Why, +you get petted and have extra nice things +to eat, beautiful bunches of grapes, and +boiled chickens, and I don't know what."</div> + +<p>"If you were <i>me</i>, you would not talk +like that," said the Invalid, in a poor sick +weak voice. "I'd eat dry bread, and never +ask to be petted at all if I were strong, +like you."</p> + +<p>The Strong Man laughed, as if he +didn't believe the Invalid.</p> + +<p>"I have to work hard all day, and nobody +seems to care a bit whether I'm tired +or not," said he. "But if you only have a +finger ache, everybody is running about +trying to find something to do you good. +And they come and read to you, and +bring you flowers, and—and—"</p> + +<p>"You just take my place for a day or +two, and see how you'd like it," said the +Invalid.</p> + +<p>"Um—well, I shouldn't like to be ill, +you know," said the Strong Man. "I +shouldn't like to lie in bed, nor have the +doctor coming to see me, because he'd +give me nasty stuff to take."</p> + +<p>"I'll be your doctor," said the Invalid. +"But you must lie in bed. Come, take +my place."</p> + +<p>The Strong Man was ashamed to +refuse.</p> + +<p>"Well, now you are comfortable, I +suppose," said the Invalid, tucking him in. +"You must try to doze a little."</p> + +<div class="figleft" style="width: 365px;"> +<img src="images/illus_020.jpg" width="365" height="500" alt="Lith. Emrik & Binger, Haarlem." title="" /> +</div> + +<p>"But I'm not sleepy," said the Strong +Man.</p> + +<p>"You'll soon be tired, and go to sleep," +said the Invalid. "I'm going away, but +shall be back in an hour or two."</p> + +<p>When he went away, the place seemed +dreadfully dull. Not a sound was to be +heard except the barking of a dog in a +farm-yard near, and the cluck cluck of +some hens.</p> + +<p>"Dear, dear," said the Strong Man, +"this is very tiresome."</p> + +<p>Presently an old lady looked in.</p> + +<p>"Poor dear, poor dear," said she, "I +will read a nice book to you."</p> + +<p>So she sat down and read out of a book. +But the Strong Man didn't care about the +book, and he thought the old lady stupid.</p> + +<p>Then she went away, and by-and-by, +a kind old gentleman came in with some +chicken, and a glass of wine, and some +beautiful white bread.</p> + +<p>"Here," said he, "Take this, it will +do you good."</p> + +<p>But the Strong Man didn't feel hungry, +and he was tired and cross by this time, +so he wouldn't have any of it. Then some +more people came in, and talked to him, +and told him the Invalid had gone to see +the reapers, and tried to be kind to him. +Then at last everybody stole away on +tiptoe, and left him alone.</p> + +<p>Then the Invalid came back. But by +that time the Strong Man had had quite +enough of being shut up in a sick room, so +he jumped up, and ran to the door.</p> + +<p>"I see you are not much to be envied," +said he to the Invalid. "I don't think I +shall ever envy anybody again so long +as I have health and strength."</p> + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<h2><span class="smcap">The Kite's Little Game</span></h2> + + +<div class='unindent'><span class="smcap">The</span> Kite laughed and chuckled to +himself until his paper fairly crackled.</div> + +<p>"We shall have such a game," said he +to his paper Tails.</p> + +<p>"We mostly do," squeaked the Tails.</p> + +<p>There were eighteen of them, and they +were all very frisky.</p> + +<p>The Kite first winked one eye, then +the other, then winked both together.</p> + +<p>I'm afraid he was rather a vulgar sort of +a Kite, but he was very jolly. His eyes +were inclined to be goggly, yellow round +the outside, with red in the middle. He +was not a particularly good-looking Kite—in +fact, he was really ugly—but he +was very funny, and loved a joke.</p> + +<p>The string suddenly wakened up out of +a nap, hearing talk going on, "Eh, what's +that?" said he.</p> + +<p>"Don't know," said the Tails.</p> + +<p>The Kite laughed again, and shook his +round ears, and showed all his teeth in +one wide grin. "We'll have a game this +afternoon," said he, once more.</p> + +<p>"Oh," said the String. "We mostly do."</p> + +<p>The Kite stuck up his pointed chin, and +shook his red paper beard. "I mean a +different sort of game to what <i>you</i> mean," +said he. "You mean, we have a game when +young Walter takes us out. But I don't +mean <i>that</i>."</p> + +<p>"Then what <i>do</i> you mean?" said the +String, who didn't care about guessing.</p> + +<p>"When he takes us out, we have to +go where <i>he</i> likes, and fly when he chooses +us to fly," said the Kite. "Now <i>I</i> mean, +we'll fly young Walter."</p> + +<p>"Eh?" said the String.</p> + +<div class="figright" style="width: 379px;"> +<img src="images/illus_025.jpg" width="379" height="500" alt="Kite flying a boy" title="" /> +</div> + +<p>The String was rather sleepy-headed, +and didn't take in new ideas very quickly. +He was so astonished now that he unrolled +himself several yards, and wriggled about +round the Kite, to look at him, as if he +must be out of his mind.</p> + +<p>"Eh?" said all the Tails, after a flutter +of surprise. But they thought it was a +joke, and that the Kite only meant to be +funny. The Kite straightened himself, +and looked very important. "When I +say a thing, I mean it," said he, in a +dignified manner.</p> + +<p>"Well, but—" said one Tail, timidly.</p> + +<p>"<i>Well</i>, but what?" snapped the Kite. +"You don't know what you're talking +about. I say we'll fly—"</p> + +<p>At that minute up came Walter. He +took hold of the Kite, and was winding +up the String, when the Kite said—</p> + +<p>"Master Walter, let's fly <i>you</i> to day!"</p> + +<p>Walter stared and laughed.</p> + +<p>"You couldn't," said he. "You're only +made of paper."</p> + +<p>"Let us try," said the Kite.</p> + +<p>"I mustn't go far, then," said Walter, +"because my mother would wonder where +I was."</p> + +<p>So the String was tied about Walter, +and up he flew. It was very jolly, and he +flew here and there like a bird. The Kite +and the String were delighted, and the +Tails kept on a chatter, chatter, chatter, +like eighteen little magpies all in a row. +But the Kite found it hard work after a +time. He had to mind the string, and +watch lest Walter should tumble down, and +keep on doing this and doing that, instead +of pleasantly fluttering about. He got +cross and grumpy at last. "I think the +old way's the best," said he. "Next time +I'll go up. Old ways are best, after all."</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 220px;"> +<img src="images/illus_027.png" width="220" height="91" alt="decoration" title="" /> +</div> + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<h2><span class="smcap">The Birds and the Fishes.</span></h2> + + +<div class='poem2'> +I think you will own<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That it is very rare</span><br /> +To see fishes and frogs<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Sail about in the air,</span><br /> +<br /> +While the birds and the poultry<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Are swimming about</span><br /> +Like so many mackerel<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or pikes, sprats, or trout,</span><br /> +<br /> +In old times, the fishes,<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And birds, were content</span><br /> +To remain all their lives<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In their <i>own</i> element.</span><br /> +<br /> +Things are different now:<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They have changed the old times,</span><br /> +Turned the world topsy-turvy,<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With no reasons or rhymes.</span><br /> +<br /> +But I think you'll agree<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It is simply absurd</span><br /> +For a fish to pretend<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He is just like a bird.</span><br /> +<br /> +But for birds to be fishes<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is really as bad:</span><br /> +One would fancy they all<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Had surely gone mad.</span><br /> +<br /> +For fishes cold water,<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For birds a warm nest,</span><br /> +Of all places, truly,<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is <i>the</i> very best.</span><br /> +</div> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 200px;"> +<img src="images/illus_037.png" width="200" height="98" alt="Decoration: flowers" title="" /> +</div><hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 377px;"> +<img src="images/illus_030.jpg" width="377" height="500" alt="Birds in the water, fish in the air" title="" /> +</div> + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<h2><span class="smcap">The Wonderful Show.</span></h2> + + +<div class='unindent'><span class="smcap">One</span> fine summer's afternoon, the Lion +went trotting home in high good humour. +As he went along, he kept muttering and +grinning to himself, as if mightily pleased. +When he got home, he banged at the door +of his den with his tail. A Lion's tail is +very strong and hard, you know, stronger +and harder than any bell rope. The +Lioness, his wife, was out at the back, +combing out the manes of her young +Lions, but presently she came and opened +the door.</div> + +<p>"My dear," cried the Lion, "<i>such</i> a +piece of news!"</p> + +<p>"Oh, indeed?" said the Lioness. +"Have you found some travellers to eat?"</p> + +<p>"Better than <i>that</i>," said the Lion, all +a-glow, rubbing his paws.</p> + +<p>"Oh, in-<i>deed</i>," said the Lioness, smiling. +"Then it must be very good indeed."</p> + +<p>"Yes," said the Lion. "Just guess, my +love."</p> + +<p>"How <i>can</i> I guess? I never was good +at guessing. Besides, you could tell me +quicker than I could guess," said the +Lion's wife.</p> + +<p>"How clever you are," said the Lion, +putting his tawny head on one side, and +looking admiringly at his queen. "Perhaps +telling <i>is</i> the quickest way after all. +Well—" Then he stopped, as if to tantalize.</p> + +<p>"Well—what? How tiresome you are," +said the Lioness.</p> + +<p>"They have brought a cageful of humans +to the town, and all the Beasts and all the +Birds are going to see the show."</p> + +<p>"<i>What!</i>" cried the Lioness, so astonished +that she could hardly believe her ears.</p> + +<p>The Lion skipped right round the +parlour three times, snapping his claws like +castanets. "Yes," said he, gleefully, "they +used to lock <i>us</i> up, and let people pay to see +us, and call us Wild Beasts, and Carnivora, +and all sorts of ugly names. But times are +changed. I wonder how they'll like it? +We'll take our little beasts of children to +see the show."</p> + +<p>"You <i>shouldn't</i> call the little ducks +Beasts," said the Lioness. "I wonder you +don't call them a parcel of Cubs."</p> + +<p>"Well, they <i>are</i> Beasts and Cubs, ain't +they?" said the Lion.</p> + +<p>"Well, never mind, I won't have them +spoken of like that," said his wife. "When +will you take me and the darling pets to +see this wonderful show?"</p> + +<p>"Come now," said the Lion, jingling +his money in the purse he carried in the +end of his tail.</p> + +<p>"Oh, I'm not dressed," said the Lioness.</p> + +<p>"You never are," said the Lion.</p> + +<p>"That's true," said his wife. "Well, +here! children! come along and see the +Tame Humans."</p> + +<p>The young cubs came rolling in, all +tumbling over one another, like jolly little +brutes as they were, and set up a wild roar +of delight at hearing they were going out +for the day. When they got half way, the +Lion suddenly stopped and considered.</p> + +<p>"I think," said he, "as we are going to +change places with the humans, we ought +to have all the fine things they used to +have, so we'll buy some clothes."</p> + +<p>"All right, my dear," said the Lioness.</p> + +<div class="figleft" style="width: 368px;"> +<img src="images/illus_035.jpg" width="368" height="500" alt="People in the zoo" title="" /> +</div> + +<p>So they went into a shop, which they +found belonged to a very civil elephant. +They were quickly fitted out with nice +suits, and then trotted contentedly on. A +large crowd of beasts and birds was going +the same way, and at the door it was hard +to get in. The greatest excitement prevailed—which +means, you know, that +people—animals, I mean—were laughing +and talking, and wondering, and squeezing, +and pushing, and treading on one another's +toes, and saying "Where are you shoving +to?" and "There's plenty of room," and +"Don't be disagreeable," and "Don't lose +your temper, pray," and asking questions, +and all that kind of thing. The Lion and +his wife were afraid to take in the children, +so left them outside with an old Cow, who +was herself <ins title="Transcriber's Note: This word not present in original text">too</ins> frightened to venture, and too +fat to squeeze through the throng. Inside, +the animals were all staring their hardest. +The humans in the cages didn't at all +relish being shown, and were very cross. +A Wolf with a long stick was telling about +all their ways, and poking them up to make +them roar. One young man in a blue +coat howled with rage, until a good-natured +old Rhinoceros, with a red shawl, +threw him a bun. He was so ungrateful as +to kick it out of his cage, which offended +the old Rhinoceros, as you may imagine.</p> + +<p>"Times are changed, ain't they?" said +a jolly old Bear to the Lion, chuckling.</p> + +<p>"Quite time too," answered the Lion.</p> + +<p>The Ostrich craned his long neck, and +stared as hard as he could, as did all the +animals. The Lioness was very well +pleased, but she hurried out to see after +her children, while the Lion stayed to have +a good look. In fact, there never had been +such a sight seen in Beastland before, and +I don't suppose there ever will be such a +one again.</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 200px;"> +<img src="images/illus_037.png" width="200" height="98" alt="Decoration: flowers" title="" /> +</div> + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<h2><span class="smcap">The Unkind Trees.</span></h2> + + +<div class='unindent'>"<span class="smcap">You</span> know it's ridiculous, and we +mustn't put up with it any longer," said +the Plane Tree. He wasn't called the +Plane Tree because he was not good looking, +but because he always spoke his mind.</div> + +<p>"That's what <i>I</i> say," grumbled the Elm.</p> + +<p>"To be sure," cried the Oak, in a deep, +deep, deep voice—you would have fancied +it came out of his boots. But I forgot: +of course Oaks don't wear boots—but that +does not signify.</p> + +<p>The Aspen and the Sycamore sighed, +and shook their leaves, and looked wise.</p> + +<p>The <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'Chesnut'">Chestnut</ins> and the Beech whispered +to one another, and waved their boughs +indignantly.</p> + +<p>"Yes," said the Poplar, a tall, straight, +stiff tree, with a squeaky voice, "I <i>do</i> +think it's a shame the Wood-cutters should +be allowed to come here and cut us up +whenever they choose. The Government, +or the Parish, or the Local Authorities, +or—or—<i>somebody</i>, ought to hinder them."</p> + +<p>"Everybody encourages them to do it," +said the Box Tree, angrily. The Box +Tree was rather fond of fighting, and that's +how he came by his name.</p> + +<p>"I know what we ought to do," said +the Birch, "Whip them."</p> + +<p>"Chop them up," cried the Plane Tree, +who was fond of carpentry.</p> + +<p>The trees all fluttered their leaves. +They were rather frightened at the ideas +of the Birch and Plane.</p> + +<p>"Well," growled the Oak. But he +couldn't think of anything to say, so was +obliged to stop.</p> + +<p>The Ivy had not said a word, but +listened to everything. Now she lifted up +her head, and spoke—so softly that it +seemed as if the summer wind was rustling +through her leaves.</p> + +<div class="figright" style="width: 372px;"> +<img src="images/illus_040.png" width="372" height="500" alt="Man on sawhorses" title="" /> +</div> + +<p>"I think," said the gentle Ivy—and +though she spoke so sweetly, her voice +could be heard by every tree—"I think +when there are so many branches to spare, +and when it is an improvement to the +trees to be lopped and pruned a little bit, +it is foolish to object. And when we know +the poor wood-cutters make their living by +cutting wood in the forest, and when poor +children are often shivering in the winter +for want of fire, it is selfish to grumble +about a few fagots of wood."</p> + +<p>There was a deep stillness. Not a +word did any tree speak, till the Elm said, +with a bit of a sneer, "Ivy does not know +what she is talking about."</p> + +<p>"She means well," said the Cedar, "but +she does talk nonsense." "So she does," +murmured some other trees.</p> + +<p>Ivy hung her head, and heard with +grief and displeasure that the very next +wood-cutter who came through the forest +should be chopped up, as an example. In +the afternoon, Hans came along, singing +gaily to himself. He looked about, and +noticed some branches that might be cut +off without spoiling the trees, for he loved +the trees, and would not have hurt them +for the world. But as he laid down his +saw on his wooden horse, it was snatched +by the Birch with its long arms, and he +felt himself whipped up.</p> + +<p>"Oh, oh, oh," cried Hans.</p> + +<p>"Ho, ho, ho," cried the trees, maliciously.</p> + +<p>Ivy covered herself with her own leaves, +for she could <ins title="Transcriber's Note: This word not present in original text">not</ins> bear to see so sad a sight, +and she cried. So Hans was cut up, and +his poor children had nobody to earn any +money to buy them food, for their mother +was dead. And the wood-cutters were +afraid to come near the forest, lest they +should be served like Hans. And what +happened? Why, there was nobody to +prune the trees, and they grew so thick +that their branches all got entangled and +twisted, and they smothered one another.</p> +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<div class='tnote'><h3>Transcriber's Notes:</h3> +<p>Obvious punctuation errors repaired.</p> + +<p>The remaining corrections made are indicated by dotted lines under the corrections. Scroll the mouse over the word and the original text will <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'apprear'">appear</ins>.</p></div> + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's The World Turned Upside Down, by E. C. 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