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diff --git a/37205.txt b/37205.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..8dad590 --- /dev/null +++ b/37205.txt @@ -0,0 +1,9496 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Sea and the Jungle, by H. M. Tomlinson + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Sea and the Jungle + +Author: H. M. Tomlinson + +Release Date: August 26, 2011 [EBook #37205] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SEA AND THE JUNGLE *** + + + + +Produced by Roger Frank and the Online Distributed +Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + THE SEA + AND THE JUNGLE + + BY + H. M. TOMLINSON + + NEW YORK + E.P. DUTTON & COMPANY + 681 FIFTH AVENUE + + + + + Published, 1920, + BY E. P. BUTTON & COMPANY + + _All Rights Reserved_ + + _First Printing, October, 1920_ + _Second Printing, September, 1921_ + + THE SEA AND THE JUNGLE + + Being the narrative of the voyage of the tramp steamer _Capella_ + from Swansea to Para in the Brazils, and thence 2000 miles along the + forests of the Amazon and Madeira Rivers to the San Antonio Falls; + afterwards returning to Barbados for orders, and going by way of + Jamaica to Tampa in Florida, where she loaded for home. Done in the + years 1909 and 1910. + + DEDICATED TO THOSE WHO + DID NOT GO + + The author is indebted to the editors of the _English Review_, the + _Pall Mall Magazine_, the _Morning Leader_, and the _Yorkshire + Observer_, for permission to incorporate such parts of this + narrative as appeared first in their publications. + + + + + CONTENTS + + CHAPTER PAGE + I. 1 + II. 98 + III. 185 + IV. 246 + V. 271 + VI. 324 + + + + +THE SEA AND THE JUNGLE + + + + +I + + +Though it is easier, and perhaps far better, not to begin at all, yet if +a beginning is made it is there that most care is needed. Everything is +inherent in the genesis. So I have to record the simple genesis of this +affair as a winter morning after rain. There was more rain to come. The +sky was waterlogged and the grey ceiling, overstrained, had sagged and +dropped to the level of the chimneys. If one of them had pierced it! The +danger was imminent. + +That day was but a thin solution of night. You know those November +mornings with a low, corpse-white east where the sunrise should be, as +though the day were still-born. Looking to the dayspring, there is what +we have waited for, there the end of our hope, prone and shrouded. This +morning of mine was such a morning. The world was very quiet, as though +it were exhausted after tears. Beneath a broken gutter-spout the rain +(all the night had I listened to its monody) had discovered a nest of +pebbles in the path of my garden in a London suburb. It occurs to you at +once that a London garden, especially in winter, should have no place in +a narrative which tells of the sea and the jungle. But it has much to do +with it. It is part of the heredity of this book. It is the essence of +this adventure of mine that it began on the kind of day which so +commonly occurs for both of us in the year's assortment of days. My +garden, on such a morning, is a necessary feature of the narrative, and +much as I should like to skip it and get to sea, yet things must be +taken in the proper order, and the garden comes first. There it was: the +blackened dahlias, the last to fall, prone in the field where death had +got all things under his feet. My pleasaunce was a dark area of soddened +relics; the battalions of June were slain, and their bodies in the mud. +That was the prospect in life I had. How was I to know the Skipper had +returned from the tropics? Standing in the central mud, which also was +black, surveying that forlorn end to devoted human effort, what was +there to tell me the Skipper had brought back his tramp steamer from the +lands under the sun? I knew of nothing to look forward to but December, +with January to follow. What should you and I expect after November, but +the next month of winter? Should the cultivators of London backs look +for adventures, even though they have read old Hakluyt? What are the +Americas to us, the Amazon and the Orinoco, Barbados and Panama, and +Port Royal, but tales that are told? We have never been nearer to them, +and now know we shall never be nearer to them, than that hill in our +neighbourhood which gives us a broad prospect of the sunset. There is as +near as we can approach. Thither we go and ascend of an evening, like +Moses, except for our pipe. It is all the escape vouchsafed us. Did we +ever know the chain to give? The chain has a certain length--we know it +to a link--to that ultimate link, the possibilities of which we never +strain. The mean range of our chain, the office and the polling booth. +What a radius! Yet it cannot prevent us ascending that hill which looks, +with uplifted and shining brow, to the far vague country whence comes +the last of the light, at dayfall. + +It is necessary for you to learn that on my way to catch the 8.35 that +morning--it is always the 8.35--there came to me no premonition of +change. No portent was in the sky but the grey wrack. I saw the hale and +dominant gentleman, as usual, who arrives at the station in a brougham +drawn by two grey horses. He looked as proud and arrogant as ever, for +his face is as a bull's. He had the usual bunch of scarlet geraniums in +his coat, and the stationmaster assisted him into an apartment, and his +footman handed him a rug; a routine as stable as the hills, this. If +only the solemn footman would, one morning, as solemnly as ever, hurl +that rug at his master, with the umbrella to crash after it! One could +begin to hope then. There was the pale girl in black who never, between +our suburb and the city, lifts her shy brown eyes, benedictory as they +are at such a time, from the soiled book of the local public library, +and whose umbrella has lost half its handle, a china nob. (I think I +will write this book for her.) And there were all the others who catch +that train, except the young fellow with the cough. Now and then he does +miss it, using for the purpose, I have no doubt, that only form of +rebellion against its accursed tyranny which we have yet learned, +physical inability to catch it. Where that morning train starts from is +a mystery; but it never fails to come for us, and it never takes us +beyond the city, I well know. + +I have a clear memory of the newspapers as they were that morning. I had +a sheaf of them, for it is my melancholy business to know what each is +saying. I learned there were dark and portentous matters, not actually +with us, but looming, each already rather larger than a man's hand. If +certain things happened, said one half the papers, ruin stared us in the +face. If those thing did not happen, said the other half, ruin stared us +in the face. No way appeared out of it. You paid your half-penny and +were damned either way. If you paid a penny you got more for your money. +Boding gloom, full-orbed, could be had for that. There was your extra +value for you. I looked round at my fellow passengers, all reading the +same papers, and all, it could be reasonably presumed, with +fore-knowledge of catastrophe. They were indifferent, every one of them. +I suppose we have learned, with some bitterness, that nothing ever +happens but private failure and tragedy, unregarded by our fellows +except with pity. The blare of the political megaphones, and the +sustained panic of the party tom-toms, have a message for us, we may +suppose. We may be sure the noise means something. So does the butcher's +boy when the sheep want to go up a side turning. He makes a noise. He +means something, with his warning cries. The driving uproar has a +purpose. But we have found out (not they who would break up side +turnings, but the people in the second class carriages of the morning +train) that now, though our first instinct is to start in a panic, when +we hear another sudden warning shout, there is no need to do so. And +perhaps, having attained to that more callous mind which allows us to +stare dully from the carriage window though with that urgent din in our +ears, a reasonable explanation of the increasing excitement and flushed +anxiety of the great Statesmen and their fuglemen may occur to us, in a +generation or two. Give us time! But how they wish they were out of it, +they who need no more time, but understand. + +I put down the papers with their calls to social righteousness pitched +in the upper register of the tea-tray, their bright and instructive +interviews with flat earthers, and with the veteran who is topically +interesting because, having served one master fifty years, and reared +thirteen children on fifteen shillings a week, he has just begun to draw +his old age pension. (There's industry, thrift, and success, my little +dears!) One paper had a column account of the youngest child actress in +London, her toys and her philosophy, initialed by one of our younger +brilliant journalists. All had a society divorce case, with sanitary +elisions. Another contained an amusing account of a man working his way +round the world with a barrel on his head. Again, the young prince, we +were credibly informed in all the papers of that morning, did stop to +look in at a toy-shop window in Regent Street the previous afternoon. So +like a boy, you know, and yet he is a prince of course. The matter could +not be doubted. The report was carefully illustrated. The prince stood +on his feet outside the toy shop, and looked in. + +To think of the future as a modestly long series of such prone mornings, +dawns unlit by heaven's light, new days to which we should be awakened +always by these clamant cockcrows bringing to our notice what the +busy-ness of our fellows had accomplished in nests of intelligent and +fruitful china eggs, was enough to make one stand up in the carriage, +horrified, and pull the communication cord. So I put down the papers and +turned to the landscape. Had I known the Skipper was back from below the +horizon--but I did not know. So I must go on to explain that that +morning train did stop, with its unfailing regularity, and not the least +hint of reprieve, at the place appointed in the Schedule. Soon I was at +work, showing, I hope, the right eager and concentrated eye, dutifully +and busily climbing the revolving wheel like the squirrel; except, +unluckier than that wild thing so far as I know, I was clearly +conscious, whatever the speed, the wheel remained forever in the same +place. Looking up to sigh through the bars after a long spin there was +the Skipper smiling at me. + +I saw an open door. I got out. It was as though the world had been +suddenly lighted, and I could see a great distance. + +We stood in Fleet Street later, interrupting the tide. The noise of the +traffic came to me from afar, for the sailor was telling me he was +sailing soon, and that he was taking his vessel an experimental voyage +through the tropical forests of the Amazon. He was going to Para, and +thence up the main stream as far as Manaos, and would then attempt to +reach a point on the Madeira river near Bolivia, 800 miles above its +junction with the greater river. It would be a noble journey. They would +see Obydos and Santarem, and the foliage would brush their rigging at +times, so narrow would be the way, and where they anchored at night the +jaguars would come to drink. This to me, and I have read Humboldt, and +Bates, and Spruce, and Wallace. As I listened my pipe went out. + +It was when we were parting that the sailor, who is used to far horizons +and habitually deals with affairs in a large way because his standards +in his own business are the skyline and the meridian, put to me the most +searching question I have had to answer since the city first caught and +caged me. He put it casually when he was striking a match for a cigar, +so little did he himself think of it. + +"Then why," said he, "don't you chuck it?" + +What, escape? I had never thought of that. It is the last solution which +would have occurred to me concerning the problem of captivity. It is a +credit to you and to me that we do not think of our chains so +disrespectfully as to regard them as anything but necessary and +indispensable, though sometimes, sore and irritated, we may bite at +them. As if servitude fell to our portion like squints, parents poor in +spirit, green fly, reverence for our social superiors, and the other +consignments from the stars. How should we live if not in bonds? I have +never tried. I do not remember, in all the even and respectable history +of my family, that it has ever been tried. The habit of obedience, like +our family habit of noses, is bred in the bone. The most we have ever +done is to shake our fists at destiny; and I have done most of that. + +"Give it up," said the Skipper, "and come with me." + +With a sad smile I lifted my foot heavily and showed him what had me +round the ankle. "Poo," he said. "You could berth with the second mate. +There's room there. I could sign you on as purser. You come." + +I stared at him. The fellow meant it. I laughed at him. + +"What," I asked conclusively, "shall I do about all this?" I waved my +arm round Fleet Street, source of all the light I know, giver of my gift +of income tax, limit of my perspective. How should I live when withdrawn +from the smell of its ink, the urge of its machinery? + +"_That_," he said. "Oh, damn that!" + + * * * * * + +It was his light tone which staggered me and not what he said. The +sailor's manner was that of one who would be annoyed if I treated him +like a practical man, arranging miles of petty considerations and +exceptions before him, arguing for hours along rows of trifles, and +hoping the harvest of difficulties of no consequence at the end of the +argument would convince him. Indeed I know he is always impatient for +the next step in any business, and not, like most of us, for more +careful consideration. "Look there," said the sailor, pointing to +Ludgate Circus, "see that Putney 'bus? If it takes up two more +passengers before it passes this spot then you've got to come." + +That made the difficulty much clearer. I agreed. The 'bus struggled off, +and a man with a bag ran at it and boarded it. One! Then it had a clear +run--it almost reached us--in another two seconds!--I began to breathe +more easily; the danger of liberty was almost gone. Then the sailor +jumped for the 'bus before it was quite level, and as he mounted the +steps, turned, and held up two fingers with a grin. + +Thus was a voyage of great moment and adventure settled for me. + +When I got home that night I referred to the authorities for the way to +begin an enterprise on the deep. What said Hakluyt? According to him it +is as easy as this: "Master John Hawkins, with the Jesus of Lubeck, a +ship of 700 tunnes, and the Solomon, a ship of seven score, the Tiger, a +barke of 50, and the Swalow of 30 Tunnes, being all well furnished with +men to the number of one hundred threescore and ten; as also with +ordnance and vituall requisite for such a voyage, departed out of +Plinmouth the 18 day of October in the yeere of our Lord 1564, with a +prosperous wind." + +But we all know such things were done far better in that century. Yet +Master John Hawkins, who seems to have handled a fleet with greater +facility than I do this pen now I am so anxious to scratch it across +preliminaries and get it to sea, did not come to a decision by the +number of passengers on a Putney 'bus. So I turned to a modern +authority. Yet Bates, I found, is worse than old John Hawkins, Bates +actually arrives at his destination in the first sentence. He steps +across in thirty-eight words from England to the Amazon. "I embarked at +Liverpool with Mr. Wallace, in a small trading vessel, on the 26th day +of April 1848; and, after a swift passage from the Irish Channel to the +equator arrived on the 26th of May off Salinas." + +Well, I did not. I say it is a gross deception. Voyaging does not get +accomplished in that off-hand fashion. It is a mockery to captives like +ourselves to pretend bondage is puffed away in that airy manner. It is +not so easily persuaded to disencumber us. Indeed, with this and that, I +found the initial step in the pursuit of the sunset red a heavy weight, +and hardly suited to the constitution of men who have worked into a deep +rut; but that high resolution and a faith equal to belief in the +liquefaction of St. Januarius' blood are needed to drop the protective +routine of years, to sheer off the dear and warm entanglements of home +and friendships; to shut the front door one bleak winter evening when +the house smells comfortable and secure, and the light on the hearth, +under such circumstances, is ironic in its bright revelation of years of +ease and stability till then not fully appraised; and so depart in the +dusk for an unknown Welsh coaling port, there to board a tramp steamer +for a voyage that has some serious doubts about it, though its landfall +shall be near the line, and have palms in it. The door slammed, I +noticed, in a chill and penetrating minor, an incident of travel I have +never seen recorded. + +Now do I come at last, O Liberty, my loved and secret divinity! Your +passionate pilgrim is here, late, though still young and eager eyed; yet +with his coat collar upturned for the present. Allons! the Open Road is +before him. But how the broad and empty prospects of his freedom shudder +with the dire sounds and cries of the milk churns on Paddington Station! + +And next I remember black night--it was, I think, about three a.m.--and +a calamitous rain, and a Welsh railway station where I had alighted, +faint with a famine, a kit bag soon to increase in weight and drag, and +a pair of numbed feet. There was a porter who bore himself as though it +were the last day and he knew the worst, a dying station light, the wind +and rain, and me. Outside was the dark, and one of the greatest coaling +ports in the world. As I could not see the coal in great bulk I could +not admire it. The railway man turned out the light, conducted me +politely into a puddle, set my course for the docks in uncharted night +with a dexter having no convictions, and left me. I began to hate the +land of the wild bard in which I found myself for the first time, and +felt a savage satisfaction in being nearly a pure blooded London Saxon; +and as I surveyed my prospects in that country, not even the fact that I +had a grandparent named Hughes would have prevented me striking Wales +with my umbrella, for it is only a cheap one; but I had left it in the +train. + +It had never occurred to me (any more than it did to you when you got +this book to learn about the tropic sea and the jungle) that the Open +Road, where the chains fall from us, would include Swansea High Street +four hours before sunrise in a steady winter downpour. But there I +discovered that trade wind seas by moonlight, flying fish, Indians, and +forests and palms, cannot be compelled. They come in their turn. They +are mixed with litter and dead stuff, like prizes in a bran tub. Going +down the drear and aqueous street it was clear that if there are exalted +moments in travel, as on the instant when we discover we really may +prepare to go, yet exaltation implies the undistinguished flats from +which, for a while, we are translated. This is a travel book for honest +men. I am still on the flat. It will be to-morrow presently. + +My chief fear was that my waterproof, rattling in the wind, would alarm +silent and sleeping Swansea. I found a policeman standing at a street +corner, holding out his cape to help away the rain. He could give me no +hope. He knew where the dock was, but the way thither was difficult and +torturous. I had better follow the tram lines, and ask again, if I saw +anybody. Therefore the tram lines I followed till my portable estate, by +compound interest, had increased to untold tons; but the empty tram way +went on for ever down the rows of frozen and desolate lamps, so that I +surrendered all my chances of the seas of the tropics and the jungle of +the Brazils, and turned aside from the course which the policeman said +led to ships and the deep, entered the dark portico of a shop, where it +was only half wet, and lit my pipe, there to wait for the shy gods to +turn my luck. Hesitating footsteps fumbled to where I was hidden, and +stopped at the flash of my match. "Could yer 'blige with a light, +mister?" + +He was a little elderly seaman in yellow oilskins and a so'wester. He +was rather drunk. His oilskins gathered the reflected street shine, so +that he looked phosphorescent, an old man risen wet and shining from the +ocean. He was looking for Buenos Aires, he explained, and hadn't got any +matches. Now he, for the Plate, and I, for ultimate Amazonas, set off +down the Swansea tram lines. And the wind whined through overhead wires, +and a lost dog followed us along the empty thoroughfare where the only +sound was of waterspouts, and the elderly mariner sang bold and improper +songs, so that I wondered there was not an irruption of nightcaps at +upper Swansea windows to witness this disturbance of their usual peace. + +We came at length to abandoned lagoons, where spectral ships were moored +down the marges, and round the wide waters was the loom of uncertain +monsters and buildings. Railway metals waylaid us and caught us by the +feet. There were many electric moons swaying in the gale, and they +spilled showers of broken light, which melted on the black water, and +betrayed to us our loneliness in outer night. The call of a vessel's +syren across that inhospitable space was heard by us as the prolonged +moan of the lost. + +The old man of the sea took me under a stack of timber to light his +pipe. He borrowed my box of matches, and malicious spurts of wind +extinguished each match, steadily, as mine ancient struck them. It was +now 4 a.m. He threw each bit of dead wood down, without irritation, as +though it were the fate of man to strike lights for the gods to douse, +but yet was he uplifted now beyond the hurt of cosmic mockery. The +matches were not wasted. At least they lighted up his sorrowful face as +he talked to me. I would not have had him any the less drunk, for it but +softened his facial integument, which I could see had been hardened and +set by bitter experience, masking the man; but now his jaded life, +warmed by emotion, though much of the emotion was artificial and of the +pewter born, was quick in his face again, and made him a human +responsive to his kind, instead of a sober and warped shellback with a +sour remembrance of his hardships, and of the futility of his endurance, +and of the distance away of his masters with their bowels of iron. + +He had seven children, and the sea was a weary place. Had I any +children?--and God keep them if I had. He was a troublesome old man +("that's another light gone") but he had just left his kids ("ah, to +hell wi' the wind") and he had to talk to someone about them, and that +was my rotten luck, said he. We got to the fifth child, and I heard +something about her, when the wind reached round the wood stack at us, +and snatched the last glim. So it was in the dark that I heard about the +other two and the wife, while one of my pockets filled with rain. Only +Milly, he said, was at work, and what was four pound a month for the +rest? And he was sick of the sea and chief mates, and did I think a chap +stood for a better time when he died, if he kept off drink and did his +bit without grousing, like some of the parson fellers said? Then he +indicated my ship, and disappeared in the dark. He is still waiting an +answer to his last question, which I have saved for you to give him. + +For me, I was in no mood to discuss whether balm is to be got in Gilead, +when we come to the place; but stumbling among the lumber on the +deserted deck of the S.S. "Capella," I found a cabin, fell into it, and +remember nothing more but the smell of hot bread, eggs and bacon, and +coffee, which visited me in a beautiful dream. Then I woke to the +reveille of a tin whistle, which the chief engineer was playing in my +ear; and it was daylight. The jumble of recollections of the night +before were but dark insanities. But the smell of that aromatic food, I +give grace, did not pass with the awakening, for next door I heard +lively sizzling in the galley. Already Fleet Street was hull down. + + * * * * * + +If you are used only to the methods of passenger steamers and regular +routes, then you know little of travel. You are but carried about. +Insistent clocks and schedules keep that way, and the upholstered but +rigid routine is a soporific. You never see the hither side of the +hedge. The granite countenance of fortune, her eyes filmed like frozen +pools, which keeps alert and bright the voyager who is unprotected from +her unscheduled and unmoral acts except by his own ready buckler, is +watched for you by others. You are never surprised into fear by the +unlucky position of the planets, nor moved to sing Laus Deo, when now +and then, the stars are propitious. I had been brought hastily to the +"Capella," for it was said she was sailing instantly. This morning I +learned at breakfast that nobody knew when she could sail. Our steamer +sat two feet higher than her capacity. There was some galvanised iron to +come from Glascow, some machinery from Sheffield; and owing to labour +difficulties we were short of several hundred tons of coal. A little mob +of us, all strangers, shuffled after the Skipper's spry heels that +morning to the Board of Trade offices, where an official mumbled over +the ship's articles, to our shut ears, and we signed where we were told. +A more glum and unromantic group of voyagers, each man twirling his +shabby hat in his hands as he waited his turn for the corroded pen, was +never seen this side of the Elizabethan era. I became the purser of the +"Capella," with my wages lawfully recorded at a shilling per month. + +I was committed. There was no withdrawal now but desertion. And +desertion, at times, I seriously considered, because for a week more the +cargo dribbled down to us, while I endured as a moucher about those +winter docks with their coal tips, and the muddy streets with their +sailors' slop marts, marine stores, and pawnshops having a cankered +display of chronometers, telescopes, and other flotsam of marine failure +and wreckage. Daily the quays and the dismal waterside ways with their +cheap shops were still more depressed by additional snow mush and drives +of sleet; and it was no warmth for this idler that he saw the tradesmen, +because of the season, putting holly among their oranges and wreathing +beer bottles with chains of coloured paper. The iron decks and cabins of +my new home were as chill and unfriendly as the empty grate, the marble +tables, and the tin advertisements of chemical slops of a temperance +hotel. Am I plain? Such are the conditions which compass the wayward +traveller. This is what chills one's rapid pulse when pursuing at last +the rosy visions of boyhood. The deplorable littoral of our island +kingdom is part of a life on the ocean wave, and should help you in +coming to a decision when next you see a friendless and bestial +sailorman. It becomes necessary to declare that we shall really get down +to the tropics presently; have the courage to wait, like the crew of the +"Capella." Our ship did sail, when she was ready. + +It was the afternoon before we sailed, and having listened long enough +to my messmates, who, after dinner, weighed the probabilities of +malaria, yellow fever and other alien disasters into our coming strange +voyage, that I went into the town to take my last look round a book +shop, and to get some marine soap, dungarees, and things. Here was I at +last with my heart's desire. On the very next day I should sail, I +myself, and no other hero, veritably Me at last, for a place not on the +chart, because the place we should find, at the journey's end, the map +described with those words of magic: "Forest" and "Unexplored." I made +my way round crates and barrels on that untidy deck, which had a thick +mud of coal dust and snow, to the ladder overside. Coal dust and melting +snow! But where was the uplifted heart, the radiant anticipation, as of +one to whom the future was big with treasures to be born, which are the +privilege of a young pilgrim, released from his usual obligations to +pursue far horizons in the Spanish main, while his envious fellows in +the city still cast ledgers under gas lamps? Here was another swindle of +the romanticists. You may search their warm and golden pages in vain for +coal tips, melting ice, delays, and steam heaters that will not work for +cold cabins. Down they go here, though. These gallant affairs, I +thought, as I descended the wet and gritty ladder, are much better done +before the fire at home, in your slippers; for the large scale map, as +you traverse its alluring blank areas, leaves out the conditions which +now, when I am on the actual business, precipitate as frozen spicules, +as would north winds, my warm, aerial, and cloudy enthusiasms that were +wont to be dyed such wonderful hues by sunsets, poems, and tales of old +travel. Another of these congealing draughts was now to catch me +unbuttoned. Because of our unusual destination, and the wild stories +that were told of it, we were a point of interest in Swansea docks, and +had many interviewers and curious visitors. Some of them were on the +quay then, inspecting our steamer, and as I stepped off the ladder one +turned to me. + +"Mister," he whispered, "are you going in her?" + +"I am," I said. + +"O gord," said he. + +That night I met a number of my grave fellow shipmates in the town. The +question was, Should we then go back to the ship? + +"What," burst out one of us in surprise--his gold-laced cap was already +resting on his right eyebrow--"Now? Not me. Boys, don't freeze the +Carnival. Follow me!" + +We followed him. The rest of the evening is more easily given in dumb +show. There was a mechanical piano in a saloon bar, and it steadily +devoured pennies, and returned to us automatic joy, fortissimo, over +which our conversation strenuously high-stepped and vaulted. Later, +there was a search for cabs, and an engineer carried with him everywhere +two geese by their necks and sometimes trod on their loose feet. When he +did this he snatched a goose from his own grasp, and then roundly abused +us for our post-dated frivolity. We learned our steamer was now moored +in mid-dock. We found a quay wall, and at the bottom of it, at a great +depth in the dark, the level of the water was seen only because shreds +of lamp-shine floated there. We understood a boat was below, and found +it was, and we loaded it till the water brimmed at the gunwale. As we +mounted the "Capella's" rope-ladder only one goose fell back into the +dock. + + * * * * * + +The "Capella" started in her sleep, and she woke me. She was still +trembling. Resting my hand on her I felt her heart begin to throb, +though faintly. We were off. + +It was a bright morning, early and keen. Those habitual quays now were +moving past us. The decks were cleared, the carpenter and some sailors +were fixing the hatches, and the pilot, muffled in a thick white shawl, +was on the bridge with the Skipper. We stopped in the outer lock, the +exhaust humming impatiently while a pier-head jumper--for we were a +sailor short--was examined by our doctor. The Skipper had some short +words for an official who had mounted the bridge, because the third mate +had deserted, and had taken his half pay; and the official, who had +volunteered to get us a substitute, had failed. There were now but two +mates for our big tramp steamer going a long and arduous voyage which +included the navigation for some months of narrow inland waterways in +the tropics. Our first mate, passing amidships where the Purser was +leaning overside, stopped to tell me what this meant for him and the +second mate. I was mighty glad it was not the purser's fault. I have +never heard a short speech more passionate; and his eyes were feral. Yet +it became increasingly clear to me, as the voyage lengthened, that his +eyes no more than met the case. + +Out we drove at last. It was December, but by luck we found a halcyon +morning which had got lost in the year's procession. It was a Sunday +morning, and it had not been ashore. It was still virgin, bearing a +vestal light. It had not been soiled yet by any suspicion of this +trampled planet, this muddy star, which its innocent and tenuous rays +had discovered in the region of night. I thought it still was regarding +us as a lucky find there. Its light was tremulous, as if with joy and +eagerness. I met this discovering morning as your ambassador while you +still slept, and betrayed not, I hope, any greyness and bleared satiety +of ours to its pure, frail, and lucid regard. That was the last good +service I did before leaving you quite. I was glad to see how well our +old earth did meet such a light, as though it had no difficulty in +looking day in the face. The world was miraculously renewed. It rose, +and received the new-born of Aurora in its arms. There was clouds of +pearl above hills of chrysoprase. The sea ran in volatile flames. The +shadows on the bright deck shot to and fro as we rolled. The breakfast +bell rang not too soon. This was a right beginning. + +The pilot was dropped, and a course was shaped to pass between Lundy and +Hartland. A strong northwester and its seas caught us beyond the +Mumbles, and the quality of the sunshine thinned to a flickering stuff +which cast only grey shadows. The "Capella" became quarrelsome, and +began to strike the seas heavily. You may know the "Capella" when you +see her. She is a modern three-thousand-ton freighter, with derrick +supports fore and aft, and a funnel; and the three of them are so +fearful of seeming rakish that they overdo the effect of stern utility, +and appear to lean ahead. She is a three-island ship, the amidships +section carrying the second mate's cabin, and the cabins of the four +engineers, all of them, excepting the Chief's cabin, looking outwards +overseas across a narrow sheltered alleyway; and on a narrower +athwartship's alleyway there, and opening astern, are the Chief's place, +and the cook's galley, the entrance to the engine-room, and the +engineers' messroom. Above this structure is the boat deck. You may +reach the poop, which contains the master's and chief mate's quarters, +the doctor's and steward's berths, and the saloon, by descending a +perpendicular iron ladder to the long main deck, or else, as all did at +sea, by a flying trestle bridge, which is dismantled when in port. Her +black funnel is relieved by a cryptic design in white, and her bows are +so bluff that, as the chief mate put it, "her belly begins there." She +might not take your eye, but a shipowner would see her points. She +carries a large cargo on a comparatively low registered tonnage. The +money that built her went mostly in hull and engines, and the latter do +their work as sweetly as an eight-day clock, giving ten and a half +knots, weather permitting, on a low coal consumption. There was not much +money left, therefore, for balm in the cabins, and that is the reason we +do not find it there. + +At sundown the sky cleared. The wind, increased in violence, had swept +it of the last feather. Lundy was over our starboard bow, a small dark +blot in a clear yellow light which poured, with the gale and the rising +seas, from the west. The glass was falling. Now, the Skipper has often +told me how his "Capella" had faced hurricanes off Cape Hatteras, when +laden with ore, and had kept her decks dry. There are other stories +about her surprising buoyancy, when deeply laden, and I have heard them +all at home, and they are fine stories. But what lies they are! For +there below me, with Lundy not even passed, and the Bay of Biscay to +come (Para not to be thought of yet) were tons and tons of salt wash +that could not get time to escape by the scuppers, but plunged wearily +amongst the hatches and winches. + +"I've never seen her as dirty as this," grumbled the chief engineer +apologetically, peeping from his cabin at cold green water lopping over +casually on to the after deck. "It's that patent fuel--its stowed wrong. +Now she'll roll--you can feel it--the cat she is, she's never going to +stop. It's that patent fuel and her new load line." + +Certainly she sat close to the sea. I had never seen so much lively +water so close. She wallowed, she plunged, she rolled, she sank heavily +to its level. I looked out from the round window of the Chief's cabin, +and when she inclined those green mounds of the swell swinging under us +and away were superior, in apparition, to my outlook. + +"Listen to it," said the Chief. He stopped triturating some shavings of +hard tobacco between his huge palms, and sat quietly, hands clasped, as +though in prayer. The surge mourned over the deck. The day, too, was +growing towards the dusky hours of retrospection. That sombre monody +outside was like the tremor and boom of the drums funebre. "That chap +some of you talk about--Lloyd George!"--said the Chief, suddenly rubbing +his tobacco again with energy. (Good God, I thought, and here we are at +sea too. Now what has the misguided man done.) "If I had him here I'd +hold him down in that wash on deck till it cleared. Then he'd know. He +put it there, to break sailors' legs. This steamer, she had dry decks +till her load line was altered. She carries more now than she was built +for, two hundred tons more. If I had him here--but there you are! +Popularity! There's a fine popular noise for you, isn't it? Sailors +growled for better food. 'What about this improved food scale?' says Mr. +Lloyd George to the shipowners. 'Oh,' said they, 'we'll give 'em better +food, the drunken insubordinate dogs, if you'll make overloading legal.' +'Why,' says Lord George, 'then it wouldn't be illegal, would it?' So it +was done. What does the public know about a ship's buoyancy? Nothing. +But it understands food. So the clever man heightens the Plimsoll mark, +adds a million or so to shipowners' capital by dipping his pen in the +ink, and gives Jack more jam. What you want ashore," the Chief added +bitterly, "is not more voters, as some say, but more lunatic asylums." + +Though I had left politics at home, to be settled by others, like the +trouble with the drains, the dog licence, and the dispute about the +garden fence, I glanced with interest at the Chief. I know him well. Not +only is he a kindly man, but he himself is also a philosophic rebel. But +his eye was hard, and he still ground the tobacco with forgetful energy, +us though an objectionable thing were between his strong hands. Then +impatiently he threw the tobacco loose on his log book, which was open +on his deck, paused, and said, "Ah, maybe the man thought a little +freeboard the less didn't matter. God give him grace," and picked his +flute out of a bookshelf which was fastened above his bunk; sat down +over the steam heater, and broke out like a blackbird. Yet was it a +well-remembered air he fluted so well. I listened so long as respect for +the artist demanded, then rose, filled my pipe from the fragrant grains +on the log book, and left him. Presently I would listen to such airs; +but this was too soon. + +I repeat I had confidence in the "Capella" to gain. I went forward to +get it, mounting the bridge, where my cabin mate, the youthful second +officer, was in charge, in his oilskins. A cheerful sight he looked. "I +think," said he briskly, "we're going to catch it." He was puckering his +face over our course. Lundy was looming large--even Rat Island was +plain--but it looked so frail in that flood of seas, wind, and wild +yellow light streaming together from the evening west, that I looked for +the unsubstantial island to spring suddenly from its foundations, and to +come down on us a stretched wisp of thinned and ragged smoke. The sea +was adrift from its old confines. The flood was pouring past, and the +wind was the drainage of interstellar space. Lundy was the last delicate +fragment of land. It still fronted the upheaval and rush of the +ungoverned elements, but one looked for it to be swept away. + +Yet that wild and scenic west, of such pallor and clarity that one +shrank from facing its inhospitable spaciousness, with each shape of a +wave there, black against the light as it reared ahead, a distinct +individual foe in the host moving to the attack, was but the prelude. +Night and the worst were to come. Just then, while the last of the light +was shining on the officer's oilskins, I was only surprised that our +bulk was such a trifle after all. Our loaded vessel looked so bluff and +massive when in dock. She began to attempt, off Lundy, the spring and +jauntiness of a trawler. The bows sank to the rails in an acre of white, +and the spume flew past the bridge like rain. The black bows lifted and +swayed, buoyant on submarine upheavals, to cut out segments of the +sunset; then sank again into dark hollows where the foam was luminous. +The cold and wind were bitter dolours. + +We rolled. I grasped the rail of the weather cloth, in the drive of wind +and spume, and rode down on our charger like a valiant man; like a +valiant man who is uncertain of his seat. Something like a valiant man. +We advanced to the attack, masts and funnel describing great arcs, and +steadily our bows shouldered away the foe. I think sailors deserve large +monies. Being the less valiant--for the longer I watched, the more grew +I wet and cold--it came to my mind that where we were, but a few weeks +before, another large freighter had her hatches opened by the seas, and +presently was but a trace of oil and cinders on the waters. You will +remember I am on my first long voyage. The officer was quite cheerful +and asked me if I knew Forest Gate. There were, he said, some fine girls +at Forest Gate. + +We rounded Hartland. It was dusk, the weather was now directly on our +starboard beam, and the waves were coming solidly inboard. The main deck +was white with plunging water. We rolled still more. + +"I can't make out why you left London when you didn't have to," said the +grinning sailor. "I'd like to be on the Stratford tram, going down to +Forest Gate." + +This was nearly as bad as the Chief's flute. I held up two fingers over +those hatches of ours, called silently on blessed Saint Anthony, who +loves sailors, and went down the ladder; for night had come, and the +prospect from the "Capella" was not the less apprehensive to the mind of +a landsman because the enemy could not be seen, except as flying ghosts. +The noises could be heard all right. + +I shut my heavy teak door amidships, shut out the daunting uproar of +floods, and the sensation that the night was collapsing round our +heaving ship. There was a home light far away, on some unseen Cornish +headland, rising and falling like a soaring but tethered star. Nor did I +want the lights of home. + +"I love the sea," a beautiful woman once said to me. (We, then, stood +looking out over it from a height, and the sea was but the sediment of +the still air, the blue precipitation of the sky, for it was that +restful time, early October. I also loved it then.) + +I was thinking of this, when the concrete floor of the cabin nearly +became a wall, and I fell absurd-wise, striking nearly every item in the +cabin. Was this the way to greet a lover? Sitting on a sea-chest, and +swaying to and fro because the ship compelled me to a figure of woe, I +began to consider whether it was only the books about the sea which I +had loved hitherto, and not the sea itself. Perhaps it is better not to +live with it, if you would love it. The sea is at its best at London, +near midnight, when you are within the arms of a capacious chair, before +a glowing fire, selecting phases of the voyages you will never make. It +is wiser not to try to realise your dreams. There are no real dreams. +For as to the sea itself, love it you cannot. Why should you? I will +never believe again the sea was ever loved by anyone whose life was +married to it. It is the creation of Omnipotence, which is not of human +kind and understandable, and so the springs of its behaviour are hidden. +The sea does not assume its royal blue to please you. Its brute and dark +desolation is not raised to overwhelm you; you disappear then because +you happen to be there. It carries the lucky foolish to fortune, and +drags the calculating wise to the strewn bones. Yet, thought I, that +night off Cornwall, if I pray now as one of the privileged and lucky +foolish, this very occasion may prove to be set apart for the sole use +of the calculating wise. Because that is the way things happen at sea. +What else may we expect from It, the nameless thing, new-born with each +dawn, but as old as the night? Now for me had it degenerated into its +mood of old night, behaving as it did in the lightless days, before +poetry came to change it with flattery. It was again as inhuman as when +the poet was merely a wonderfully potential blob on a warm mudbank. + +Here, you see, is the whole trouble in appealing to Omnipotence. Picture +me entering the wide western ocean at night, an inconspicuous but +self-important morsel sitting on a sea-chest, at a time when it was +perhaps ordained that hundreds of ships should have anxious passages. +(Afterwards I learned very many ships did have anxious passages.) How +could I expect to be spared, even though somewhere the hairs of my head +were all numbered? It is plain that to spare me would be to extend +beneficence to all. There only remained to me my liberty to hope that +our particular steamer might miss all seventh waves, by luck. I was free +to do that. + +I turned up the dull and stinking oil lamp, and tried to read; but that +fuliginous glim haunted the pages. That black-edged light too much +resembled my own thoughts made manifest. There were some bunches of my +cabin mate's clothes hanging from hooks, and I watched their erratic +behaviour instead. The water in the carafe was also interesting, because +quite mad, standing diagonally in the bottle, and then reversing. A lump +of soap made a flying leap from the washstand, and then slithered about +the floor like something hunted and panic-stricken. I listened to +numerous little voices. There was no telling their origins. There was a +chorus in the cabin, rustlings, whispers, plaints, creaks, wails, and +grunts; but they were foundered in the din when the spittoon, which was +an empty meat tin, got its lashings loose, and began a rioting fandango +on the concrete. Over the clothes chest, which was also our table and a +cabin fixture, was a portrait of the mate's sweetheart, and on its frame +was one of my busy little friends the cockroaches; for the mate and I do +not sleep alone in this cabin, not by hundreds. The cockroach stood in +thought, waving his hands interrogatively, as one who talks to himself +nervously. The ship at that moment received a seventh wave, lurched, and +trembled. The cockroach fell. I rose, listening. I felt sure a new +clamour would begin at once, showing we had reached another and critical +stage of the fight. But no; the brave heart of her was beating as +before. I could feel its steady pulse throbbing in our table. We were +alive and strong, though labouring direfully. + +It was when I was thinking whether bed would be, as I have so often +found it, the best answer to doubt, that I heard a boatswain's pipe. + +I fought one side of the door, and the wind fought the other. My hurry +to open the door was great, but the obstinate wind jammed it firmly. +Without warning the wind released its hold, the ship fell over to +windward, the door flew open, and forth I went, clutching at the driving +dark. Then up sailed my side of the ship, and the door shut with the +sound of gunfire. I had never experienced such insensate violence. These +were the unlawful noises and movements of chaos. Hanging to a rail, I +was puzzling out which was the fore and which the rear of the ship, when +a flying lump of salt water struck me in the face just as a figure (I +thought it was the chief officer) hurried past me bawling "All hands." + +The figure came back. "That you, purser? Number three hatch has gone," +it said, and disappeared instantly. + +So. Then this very thing had come to me, and at night! Our hatches were +adrift. It was impossible. Why, we had only just left Swansea. It could +not be true; it was absurdly unfair. This was my first long voyage, and +it had only just begun. I stood like the cricketer who is out for a +duck. + +If I could tell you how I felt, I would. Somebody was shouting +somewhere, but his words were cut off at once by the wind and blown +away. I felt my way along a wet and dark iron alleyway which was giddily +unstable, pressing hard against my feet, and then falling from under me. +I got round by the engine-room entrance. Small gleams, shavings of +light, were escaping from seams in the unseen structure, but they showed +nothing, except a length of wet rail or a scrap of wet deck. The ship +itself was a shade, manned by voices. + +I could not see that anything was being done. Were they allowing her to +fill up like an open barge? I became aware my surcharged feelings were +escaping by my knees, which kept knocking in their tremors against a +lower rail. I tried to stop this trembling by hardening my muscles, but +my fearful legs had their own way. Yet it is plain there was nothing to +fear. I told my legs so. Had we not but that day left Swansea? Besides, +I had already commenced a letter which was to be posted at Para. The +letter would have to be posted. They were waiting for it at home. + +Somewhere below me a heavy mass of water plunged monstrously, and became +a faintly luminous cloud over all the main deck aft, actually framing +the rectangular form of the deck in the night. It was unreasonable. I +was not really one of the crew either, though on the articles. I was +there by chance. No advantage should be taken of that. A torrent poured +down the athwartships alleyway, and nearly swept me from my feet. + +One could not watch what was happening. That was another cruel +injustice. The wind and sea could be heard, and the ship could be felt. +But how could I be expected to know what to do in the dark in such +circumstances? There ought to be a light. This should have happened in +the daytime. My garrulous knees struck the lower rail violently in their +excitement. I leaned over the rail, shading my eyes. I grew savagely +indignant with something having no name and no shape. I cannot even now +give a name to the thing that angered me, but can just discern, in the +twilight which shrouds the undiscovered, a vast calm face the rock of +which no human emotion can move, with eyes that stare but see nothing, +and a mouth that never speaks, and ears from which assailing cries and +questions fall as mournful echoes, ironic repetitions. This flung stone +falls from it, as unavailing as your prayers; but we shall never cease +to pray and fling stones, alternately, up there into the twilight. + +Nevertheless, when the chief, with his hurricane lamp, found me, he says +I was smiling. The youth who was our second mate ran up and stood by us, +the better to shout to the deck below. He shouted, bending over the +rail, till he was screaming through hoarseness. He turned to us +abruptly. "They don't understand a word I say," he cried in despair. +"There isn't a sailor or an Englishman in the crowd, the ---- German +farmers." This, I found afterwards, was nearly true. These men had been +signed on at a Continental port. It was really our Dutch cook who saved +us that night. It was the cook who first saw the hatch covers going. + +The ship's head had been put to the seas to keep the decks as clear as +possible, and being now more accustomed to the gloom I could make out +the men below busy at the hatch. Most conspicuous among them was the +cook, who had taken charge there, and he, with three languages, +bludgeoned into surprising activity the inexperienced youngsters who +were learning for the first time what happens to a ship when the +carpenter's chief job on leaving port has its defects discovered by +exceptional weather. They were wading through swirling waters as they +worked, and once a greater wave sprang bodily over them, and when the +hatch showed through the foam again some of the men had gone as though +dissolved. But it was found they had kept the right side of the +bulwarks, and the elderly carpenter, whose leg had got wedged in a +winch, was the only one damaged. + +If you ask me when I shall be pleased to allow the necessary sun to rise +upon this narrative to give it a little warmth, then I must tell you it +cannot be done till we have fastened down the "Capella's" number two +hatch, at least. That hatch has gone now, and if hatches one and four +give way while number two is getting attention from the weary, soaked, +and frozen crowd which has just had an hour's desperate work at number +three, then I fear the sun will never rise on this narrative. (How Bates +got over to his wonderful blue butterflies in those forest paths under a +tropical sun in thirty-eight words I do not know. He must have been +thinking of nothing but his butterflies. I cannot do it, with the seas +and the ship keeping my mind so busy.) + +Luckily, the other hatches kept staunch. We were watertight again. When +the Old Man, the Chief, the Doctor, and the Purser, gathered late that +night in the Chief's cabin to see what it was he had secreted in his +cupboard, and boasted of, we sat where we could, being comfortably +crowded, and I never knew tobacco could taste like that. I felt as if +never before had I found such large leisure for extracting its full +flavour. From being suddenly confined within a space which gave me a +short outlook of a few hours, I was presently released into the open +again and of what might remain to me of the usual gift of ample years. I +had all that time to smoke in. Never did a pipe taste so sweet. It is +idle for good and serious souls to think me graceless here with this +talk of tobacco immediately after such a release. Let me tell them my +sacrificial smoke rose up straight and accepted. Looking through the +smoke I saw clearly how worthy, kind, and lovable were the faces of my +comrades. I warmed to this voyage for the first time; as though, after a +test, I had been initiated. This was the place for me, with men like +these about me, and such great affairs to be met. I revelled in the +thought of our valorous bluff, insignificant as we were in that malign +desolation, sundered from our kind. + +"Chief," said the Old Man, "it was my department that time. None of your +old engines did it." + +"You've got a good cook," said the Chief, "I saw that." Then the Chief, +remembering something, turned in his seat to the picture hanging above +his desk of a smiling and handsome matron. "Here's luck, old girl," he +said, holding up his glass; "you can still send me some letters." + + * * * * * + +The Chief, in case of an emergency, slept in his clothes that night on +the settee, and I climbed into his bunk. What a comfortable outline the +man had, as he lay on his broad back, mildly snoring. There was a tangle +of tense hair over a square copper coloured forehead. A long experience +of such nights was written in many lines on that brow, and was shown in +that indifferent snoring while chaos was without. The nose sprang out of +the big face like an ejaculation, and beneath it was a moustache clipped +short to show the red of the upper lip. The jaw was powerful, but its +curves made it friendly. His body and limbs hid the settee and had a +margin over. I quite believed what I had been told of his successful way +with refractory stokers. There was confidence to be got from a mere look +at that slumbering Jovian form. The storm assailed its hairy and fleshy +ears in vain. I braced my knees against the bulkhead to keep myself +still, the rolling was so violent, and went to sleep ... waking to find +us on a level keel; and was deceived into thinking the parallel lines of +grey and gold in the upper air, seen as a picture framed by the port, +were the heights about; a harbour into which we had run for shelter; but +it was only cloudland over the western ocean. The stillness, too, was +but a short reprieve. The wind was merely making a detour, to spring at +us from another quarter. + +The sun died at birth. The wind we had lost we found again as a gale +from the south-east. The waters quickly increased again, and by noon the +saloon was light and giddy with the racing of the propeller. I moved +about like an infant learning to walk. We were 201 miles from the +Mumbles, course S.W. 1/2W.; it was cold, and I was still looking for the +pleasures of travel. The Doctor came to introduce himself, like a good +man, and tried me with such things as fevers, Shaw, Brazilian +entomology, the evolution of sex, the medical profession under +socialism, the sea and the poets. But my thoughts were in retreat, with +the black dog in full cry. It was too cold and damp to talk even of sex. +When my oil lamp began to throw its rays of brown smell, the Doctor, +tired of the effort to exalt the sour dough which was my mind, left me. +It was night. O, the sea and the poets! + +By next morning the gale, now from the south-west, like the seas, was +constantly reinforced with squalls of hurricane violence. The Chief put +a man at the throttle. In the early afternoon the waves had assumed +serious proportions. They soared by us in broad sombre ranges, with +hissing white ridges, an inhospitable and subduing sight. They were a +quite different tribe of waves from the volatile and malicious natives +of the Bristol Channel. Those channel waves had no serried ranks in the +attack; they were but a horde of undisciplined savages, appearing to +assault without design or plan, but getting at us as they could, +depending on their numbers. The waves in the channel were smaller folk, +but more athletic, and very noisy; they appeared to detach themselves +from the sea, and to leap at us, shouting. + +These western ocean waves had a different character. They were the sea. +We did not have a multitude of waves in sight, but the sea floor itself +might have been undulating. The ocean was profoundly convulsed. Our +outlook was confined to a few heights and hollows, and the moving +heights were swift, but unhurried and stately. Your alarm, as you saw a +greater hill appear ahead, tower, and bear down, had no time to get more +than just out of the stage of surprise and wonder when the "Capella's" +bows were pointing skyward on a long up-slope of water, the broken +summit of which was too quick for the "Capella"--the bows disappeared in +a white explosion, a volley of spray, as hard as shot, raked the bridge, +the foredeck filled with raging water, and the wave swept along our run, +dark, severe, and immense; with so little noise too; with but a faint +hissing of foam, as in a deliberate silence. The "Capella" then began to +run down a valley. + +The engines were reduced to half speed; it would have been dangerous to +drive her at such seas. Our wet and slippery decks were bleak, +windswept, and deserted. The mirror of water on the iron surfaces, +constantly renewed, reflected and flashed the wild lights in the sky as +she rolled and pitched, and somehow those reflections from her polish +made the steamer seem more desolate and forlorn. Not a man showed +anywhere on the vessel's length, except merely to hurry from one vantage +to another--darting out of the ship's interior, and scurrying to another +hole and vanishing abruptly, like a rabbit. + +The gale was dumb till it met and was torn in our harsh opposition, +shouting and moaning then in anger and torment as we steadily pressed +our iron into its ponderable body. You could imagine the flawless flood +of air pouring silently express till it met our pillars and pinnacles, +and then flying past rift, the thousand punctures instantly spreading +into long shrieking lacerations. The wounds and mouths were so many, +loud, and poignant, that you wondered you could not see them. Our +structure was full of voices, but the weighty body which drove against +our shrouds and funnel guys, and kept them strongly vibrating, was +curiously invisible. The hard jets of air spurted hissing through the +winches. The sound in the shrouds and stays began like that of something +tearing, and rose to a high keening. The deeper notes were amidships, in +the alleyways and round the engine-room casing; but there the ship +itself contributed a note, a metallic murmur so profound that it was +felt as a tremor rather than heard. It was almost below human hearing. +It was the hollow ship resonant, the steel walls, decks, and bulkheads +quivering under the drumming of the seas, and the regular throws of the +crank-shaft far below. + +It was on this day the "Capella" ceased to be a marine engine to me. She +was not the "Capella" of the Swansea docks, the sea waggon squatting low +in the water, with bows like a box, and a width of beam which made her +seem a wharf fixture. To-day in the Atlantic her bluff bows rose to meet +the approaching bulk of each wave with such steady honesty, getting up +heavily to meet its quick wiles, it is true, but often with such success +that we found ourselves perched at a height above the gloom of the +hollow seas, getting more light and seeing more world; though sometimes +the hill-top was missed; she was not quick enough, and broke the +inflowing ridge with her face. She behaved so like a brave patient thing +that now her portrait, which I treasure, is to me that of one who has +befriended me, a staunch and homely body who never tired in faithful +well-doing. She became our little sanctuary, especially near dayfall, +with those sombre mounts close round us bringing twilight before its +time. + +Your glance caught a wave passing amidships as a heaped mass of polished +obsidian, having minor hollows and ridges on its slopes, conchoidal +fractures in its glass. It rose directly and acutely from your feet to a +summit that was awesome because the eye travelled to it over a long and +broken up-slope; this hill had intervened suddenly to obscure thirty +degrees of light; and the imagination shrank from contemplating water +which over-shadowed your foothold with such high dark bulk toppling in +collapse. The steamer leaning that side, your face was quite close to +the beginning of the bare mobile down, where it swirled past in a +vitreous flux, tortured lines of green foam buried far but plain in its +translucent deeps. It passed; and the light released from the sky +streamed over the "Capella" again as your side of her lifted in the +roll, the sea falling down her iron wall as far as the bilge. The +steamer spouted violently from her choked valve, as it cleared the sea, +like a swimmer who battles, and then gets his mouth free from a smother. + +Her task against those head seas and the squalls was so hard and +continuous that the murmur of her heart, which I fancied grew louder +almost to a moaning when her body sank to the rails, the panic of her +cries when the screw raced, when she lost her hold, her noble and +rhythmic labourings, the sense of her concentrated and unremitting power +given by the smoke driving in violence from her swaying funnel, the +cordage quivering in tense curves, the seas that burst in her face as +clouds, falling roaring inboard then to founder half her length, she +presently to raise her heavy body slowly out of an acre of foam, the +cascades streaming from her in veils,--all this was like great music. I +learned why a ship has a name. It is for the same reason that you and I +have names. She has happenings according to her own weird. She shows +perversities and virtues her parents never dreamed into the plans they +laid for her. Her heredity cannot be explained by the general chemics of +iron and steel and the principles of the steam engine; but something +counts in her of the moods of her creators, both of the happy men and +the sullen men whose bright or dark energies poured into her rivets and +plates as they hammered, and now suffuse her body. Something of the +"Capella" was revealed to me, "our" ship. She was one for pride and +trust. She was slow, but that slowness was of her dignity and size; she +had valour in her. She was not a light yacht. She was strong and hard, +taking heavy punishment, and then lifting her broad face over the seas +to look for the next enemy. But was she slow? She seemed but slow. The +eye judged by those assailing hills, so vast and whelmingly quick. The +hills were so dark, swift, and great, moving barely inferior to the +clouds which travelled with them, the collapsing roof which fell over +the seas, flying with the same impulse as the waters. There was the +uplifted ocean, and pressing down to it, sundered from it only by the +gale--the gale forced them apart--the foundered heavens, a low ceiling +which would have been night itself but that it was thinned in patches by +some solvent day. And our "Capella," heavy as was her body, and great +and swift as were the hills, never failed to carry us up the long +slopes, and over the white summits which moved down on us like the +marked approach of catastrophe. If one of the greater hills but hit us, +I thought---- + +One did. Late that afternoon the second mate, who was on watch, saw such +a wave bearing down on us. It was so dominantly above us that +instinctively he put his hand in his pocket for his whistle. It was his +first voyage in an ocean steamer; he was not long out of his +apprenticeship in "sails," and so he did not telegraph to stop the +engines. The Skipper looked up through the chart-room window, saw the +high gloom of this wave over us, and jumped out for the bridge ladder to +get at the telegraph himself. He was too late. + +We went under. The wave stopped us with the shock of a grounding, came +solid over our fore-length, and broke on our structure amidships. The +concussion itself scattered things about my cabin. When the "Capella" +showed herself again the ventilators had gone, the windlass was damaged, +and the iron ends of the drum on the forecastle head, on which a steel +hawser was wound, had been doubled on themselves, like tinfoil. + +By day these movements of water on a grand scale, the harsh and deep +noises of gale and breaking seas, and the labouring of the steamer, no +more than awed me. At least, my sight could escape. But courage went +with the light. At dusk, the eye, which had the liberty during the hours +of light to range up the inclines of the sea to distant summits, and +note that these dangers always passed, was imprisoned by a dreadful +apparition. When there was more night than day in the dusk you saw no +waves. You saw, and close at hand, only vertical shadows, and they +swayed noiselessly without progressing on the fading sky high over you. +I could but think the ocean level had risen greatly, and was see-sawing +much superior to us all round. The "Capella" remained then in a +precarious nadir of the waters. Looking aft from the Chief's cabin I +could see of our ship only the top of our mainmast, because that +projected out of the shadow of the hollow into the last of the day +overhead; and often the sheer apparitions oscillating around us swung +above the truck of it, and the whole length vanished. The sense of +onward movement ceased because nothing could be seen passing us. At dusk +the steamer appeared to be rocking helplessly in a narrow sunken place +which never had an outlet for us; the shadows of the seas erect over us +did not move away, but their ridges pitched at changing angles. + +You know the Sussex chalk hills at evening, just at that time when, from +the foot of them, they lose all detail but what is on the skyline, +become an abrupt plane before you of unequal height. That was the view +from the "Capella," except that the skyline moved. And when we passed a +barque that evening it looked as looks a solitary bush far on the summit +of the downs. The barque did not pass us; we saw it fade, and the height +it surmounted fade, as shadows do when all light has gone. But where we +saw it last a green star was adrift and was ranging up and down in the +night. + +This was the dark time when, struggling from amidships to the poop, you +knew there was something organised and coherent under you, still a +standing place in chaos, only because you could feel it there. And this +was the time to seek your fellows in the saloon, where there was light, +warmth, sane and familiar things, and dinner. The "Capella's" saloon was +fairly large, and the Skipper's pride. It was panelled in maple and oak, +with a long settee at the foreward end upholstered in red velvet, the +velvet protected by a calico cover. A brass oil lamp with an opaline +shade hung over the table from a beam beneath the skylight. There was a +closed American stove, with a rigorously polished brass flue running up +through the deck. On two oak sideboards in corners of the saloon some +artificial plants blossomed; from single stems each plant blossomed into +flowers of aniline dyes and of different species. One of these plants, +an imitation palm, and a better imitation of life than the others, was +carefully watered throughout the voyage by the steward till it wilted +into corruption and an offence, and became a count against the steward +which the skipper never forgave, for he thought his floral ornaments +lovely. When a pretty Brazilian lady visitor at Itacoatiara admired the +magenta rays of one blossom, he culled it for her (five earnest minutes +with a sharp knife, for there was wire behind the green bark) more as a +sacrifice and a hard duty than a joy, and often spoke of it afterwards, +shaking his head regretfully. + +Ah! that saloon. I remember it first, shiny, cold, and repellent, with a +handful of fire to its wide capacity for draughts, in the northern seas. +It had curious marine odours then, with which I was not friendly till +long after, odours that lamps, burnished brass, newly polished wood, +food, and the steward's storeroom behind it, never fully accounted for; +and I remember it as I found it in the still heat of the Amazon, when it +had the air of an oven; when, writing in it, the sweat ran off the +fingers to soil the paper, strange insects crawling everywhere on its +green baize table cover, and banging against its lamp. I remember it +assiduously now, every trivial feature of it, and the men, now scattered +over all the world, thrown together in it then for a spell to make the +most of each other. It has the indelible impress of a room of that house +where first the interest in existence awakened in us. + +The Skipper, with stove behind him, took his seat before the soup tureen +at the head of the table. You would as soon think of altering the +chart-room clock, even were it wrong, as of touching the soup tureen +without the Skipper's orders. It is his duty and his right to serve the +soup, and to call the steward to inform him the density of the +vegetables in it is too heavy. We have no market garden on board, you +know. + +The Doctor was on the Skipper's right hand, and the Purser next to the +Doctor, and on the opposite side, the chief mate. There was the plump +and bald-headed German steward, in white apron, the lid of one eye +heavier than the other, serving us in his shirt sleeves, sometimes +sucking his teeth with a noticeable click when he knew a dish deserved +our approval. You kept the soup in the plate by holding it off the table +and watching its tides. When her stern sailed up, and the screw raced, +the glass shade of the lamp, being a misfit, took our eyes to watch the +coming smash; the soup then poured over you, and trying to push your +chair back from the mess, you found the chair was a fixture on the +floor. This last fact was never remembered. I should try to push my +"Capella" chair back now, if I were sitting in it. + +The Doctor, who had been long enough tinkering careless bodies to have +grown a little worn and grizzled, was often removed from us by a faint +but impervious hauteur, though maybe he was only a little better and +differently dressed. He was a patient listener, but his eyes could be +droll. The Doctor's chuckle, escaping from his thoughts while he was +unguarded, would sometimes make the captain look up from a narrative +with question and a trace of resentment in his glance. The captain was a +great traveller, but he was puzzled to find the memory of our surgeon +following him to the most remote and unfamiliar strands. "Now how did +that fellow come to be at a place like that?" the captain would whisper +to me afterwards. "Can't make him out. Who is he?" The surgeon had a +bottomless fund of short stories, to which he would sometimes go about +the time when we were pushing away the banana skins and nutshells. He +had an elusive and stimulating method with them. He knew his work. At +the end of one the captain would explain the fun to the seriously +interested mate (who had leaned forward to learn), placing spoons and +crumbs to demonstrate the main points. Then the mate, too, would join us +with his happy laugh. The late and giddy laughter of the mate, when he +also arrived, became a welcome feature of a yarn by the surgeon. We +expected it. The mate's own stories were usually bawdy; he always +prefaced them with some unmanageable hilarity, which impeded his start. + +Mate (_pushing over his plate for soup_). That big wave washed out the +men's berths, sir. + +Captain. Then it did some good. The dirty brutes. + +Mate. Heard the men grumbling to-night. Said we'll never get the hawsers +to run out with them bugs in the hawse pipes. Say the bugs don't belong +to them, sir--ship's property. + +Doctor. Any this end of the ship, captain? Good Lord! + +Captain. Not a bug. And if there's any for'ard the men brought 'em. No +bugs in my ship. Never saw one in my cabin. + +Mate (_making a confused effort to master his emotion, not to spill his +soup, and to be respectful_). Te-he! you will, sir, Te-he! (_Realises he +may not laugh, but suffers internally._) + +Captain (_indicates an interrogation with frightful eyes and guttural +noises_). + +Mate (_controls himself by concentrating on a fork_). Well, sir--I'm +just telling you--I heard it said the men annoyed with bugs--some of 'em +said seein's believin'--said they had enough for everybody. (_His voice +breaks into a stifled falsetto_) So they emptied a match--match--they +emptied a match box full down your ventilator this morning. + + * * * * * + +The captain would frequently keep his seat in the saloon after dinner +till he had finished his cigar, and in the vein, would put a leg over +the arm of his chair, which he had pushed back (his chair was cushioned, +and was not a fixture), and frowning at his cigar, as if for defects, +would voyage again his early seas. I suppose a sailor would call our +skipper a hard case. He was an elderly man, tall, spare, and meagrely +bearded. His eyes were set close into a knife-like nose, and they were +opaque and bright, like two blue stones under a forehead which narrowed +and tightened into a small shiny cranium. There were tufts of grey wool +above his temples. No light came through his eyes to make them limpid, +except when he was fondling Tinker, the dog. They shone from the +surface, giving him a look of peering and intent suspicion. The skin of +his face, neck and hands, now worked a little loose, was so steeped in +the tincture of sunshine that it had preserved an unctious child-like +quality. His dress and habits betrayed an appreciation of his own +person. He kept his own medicines. + +I guessed he would have a ruthless process in an emergency; he would +identify the success and safety of the ship with his own. He laughed +from his mouth only, throwing his head back, showing surprisingly +perfect teeth, and laughter did not change the crystalline glitter of +his eyes. There was something alien and startling in his merriment. As +though his own mind were too cold for him at times he would seek out me, +or the chief, to find warmth in an argument. He would irritate us into a +disputation; and though he was a choleric man, quick at opposition, yet +his vocabulary then was flinty and sparse. It stuck, and was delivered +with pain. You could think of him labouring at his views of men and +affairs with a creaking slate pencil. He set one's teeth. But he was a +sailor, cautious and bold, with a knowledge of ships and the sea that +was a mine to me. Let me say that, during the voyage, I found him busy +making a canvas cot. He sat on the poop and worked there, bent and +patient as a seamstress, for days. With a judgment made too readily I +believed he was, naturally, making it for his own comfort, against the +heat of the river. When it was finished he was rolling up his ball of +yarn, surveying his job, and he said, mumbling and shy, that the cot was +for me. + +The Skipper, on this day that our decks were swept, swore about the men +and the bugs during dinner, muttered with foreboding about the glass, +which was still falling, and the coals, which were being burnt to no +purpose. We were hardly doing more than holding our place on our course. +The saloon was delirious, and when she flung up her heels, the varied +noises rose with the racing propeller to a crescendo of furious +castenets. The mate let us. The Skipper sat glooming, eyeing his cigar +resentfully, his leg over the arm of his chair. The Doctor was swaying +with the ship, weary and forlorn. Tinker had an appeal in his eyes, and +made timorous noises. The Purser wondered why he was there at all, and +blamed his silly dreams. The night boomed without. What a night! + +Skipper. If this southerly wind goes round to the west and north, look +out. I saw porpoises to-day too. + +Doctor. When are we due at Para? + +Skipper. Huh! What's this talk of Para? You wait. All this talk about +when we shall get there's no good.... Now in those Newfoundland +schooners where I served my time--I wouldn't have no talk in them about +getting anywhere. Seems as if somebody heard. You always run into it. +There was the "Lizzie Polwith." She was about 80 tons. Those west +country schooners in the fish trade are never more than 100 tons, else +they'd have to carry more than a master and one mate. I was her master, +and a kid of eighteen. We left Falmouth for Cadiz. Now look what +happened. My mate was old Tregenna. He was a regular misery. I never +knew such a dead homer, not so much as he was, always wanting to talk +about his wife. I say, when you've cast off, it's best not to have a +home. The ship wants all you can give her. Tregenna, he looked back a +lot. You know what I mean. Couldn't keep his mind on his job, but wished +he was through with it. There he'd be cutting bread at dinner, and it +'ud remind him, and he'd be wishing he was cutting it at home. When +things began to go stiff, he'd say, "who wouldn't sell his little farm +to go to sea?" Used to figure out on paper how long we'd be before we'd +be back. Why, you never know when you'll get back. + +See what happened. We left Cadiz that year on the first of January, and +got things just right. The winds chased us over. There were big +following seas, but you know those schooners ride like ducks. Up and +over they go. Never a drop did we ship. Though they're lively enough to +bruise and sicken all but good sailors. And old Tregenna was rubbing his +hands and making out his figures better and better. + +We arrived off St. Johns in a bit more than three weeks. I reckon I'd +done it all right, being such a young chap too. Well, I was turning in +that night, and just as I got into the companion a man said, "There goes +a lump of ice." I jumped out again. Why, there was ice all round us. The +sea was full of it as far as I could see into the night. "This is all +along of your figuring," I sang out to Tregenna. "But you'll have a lot +of time to reckon it up afresh," I said. + +So he had. Do you know when we got in? We got in on April 15. We were +two months and a half getting in. And we came over in three weeks. +There's something in that Jonah story. Always some fool who can't keep +his mouth shut and his mind on his job. + +We did have a time. Two and a half months, and our provisions ran out. +We were living on a little meal and dried peas. The ice chafed the +"Lizzie" till the rudder was worn down to the stock. It roughed up her +wooden sides till they looked as if they were covered with long coarse +hair. We were a sight when we got in. You wouldn't have known us, +hardly. We looked as if we'd come up from the bottom.... Don't ask me +when we shall get to Para. Wait till we're out of this. Listen to that +dog. Shut up, you Tinker. Making that noise, sir! Go and lie down. + +The Skipper clapped on his cap aggressively and went out. The Doctor had +a long and eloquent silence. Then he turned to me. "This beats all," he +said. "Come and have a drop of gin, old dear." He led the way to his +berth, which smelt of varnish and of lamp, and we swayed in chorus as +the ship rolled, and had a heartening mourn together. But for its +accidental compensations travel would not be worth the trouble. In proof +of that there is the entry in my diary some days after: + +"December 22. Awoke at four a.m. with the ship rolling as brutally as +ever. A great noise of waters and things banging. The seas huge at +sunrise, when the light came over their tops. Depressing sight. The sky +was blue at first, but was soon overcast with squalls. The horizon ahead +gets slate coloured, and low clouds underneath, like ragged bales of +dirty wool, come towards us heavy and fast. Then the squall and waves +rush down on us express, and the ship buries herself. Constantly hearing +engine-room bell sounded from bridge to slacken speed as a big sea +appears. The captain popped in his head as I was deciding whether to get +up or stay where I was. He gazed sternly at me and said he was looking +for Jonah. I half believe he means it too. Everybody is weary of this. +The men have been in oilskins since the start. + +"Noon to-day, Lat. 42.6 N. Long. 11.10 W. Miles by engines since noon +yesterday 222. Knots by revolutions 9.2. But the slip is 49.2 per cent. +So actual distance 112 miles only, and knots 4.6. Bad going. Wind +southly. Engines racing and engineer still at throttle. + +"Night, and a full moon tearing past cloud openings. The ship +occasionally shows like a pale ghost, the black shadows of the funnel +guys and stanchions oscillating on the white paint-work as she rolls. I +went into Chief's cabin, and from its open door--for it was sensibly +milder--looked out astern over the way we had come. Up and down, this +side and that, went the steamer, and the Great Bear, in a wind clear +patch of sky, was dancing on our wake. Polaris was making eccentric +orbits round the main masthead light. Then the Skipper came in. He sat +gazing astern. The look of his face was enough. It was quite plain he +would like to be offended to-night, and attack anybody about anything. +Presently he started intently as he looked astern, and jumped from his +seat crying the ultimate anathema on the chap at the wheel; and ran out. +The Chief glanced astern and laughed. 'The old man comes in here because +it's uncommon handy for watching the wake. Look at it. Somebody on the +bridge writing letters on the ocean. Thinking of his sweetheart, and her +name is Sue.' We gave the Skipper's voice time to reach the wheelhouse, +and then saw the wake visibly tauten out. + +"I went aft, balancing like a man learning the tight rope, along the +trestle bridge. The moon was still falling precipitously through the +broken sky, and areas of the great seas, where the sweeping searchlight +of the moon showed monsters shaping and slowly vanishing, were +frightful. There were sudden expansions of vivid green lightnings in the +north and east. I found the Doctor in the chief mate's cabin. I sang +some songs in a riving minor, accompanied by the mate on an accordion, +for the doctor's amusement, and discovered why sailors always use the +accordion, previously a mystery to me. It has a sad and reflective note, +suited to men with memories when alone on the ocean. It ought to fit +Celtic bards better than the harp. It has a fine expiring moan. The mate +gave an imitation of a dying man with it. + +"To bed at 11. Tried to read Henry James. My cockroach came out to wave +his derisive hands at me. No wonder. The light was very bad, and I was +pitched from side to side of the bunk. Nearly thrown out once. I might +just as well have attempted to read the Bhagavad-Gita in the original. +So I read the last letters from home instead and then fell asleep as a +little child." + + * * * * * + +There was something of leisure in her movements next morning. I felt +sure the glass must be rising at last. The air felt lighter and more +expansive. A peep through the port showed me the ceiling had gone up +considerably in the night. There was little wind, for the waves, though +as great as ever, had lost their white ridges. Their summits were +rounded and smooth. We were running south out of it, though the residue +of the dreary northern seas was still washing about the decks. It was +December yesterday, but April to-day. The engineers' messroom boy, with +bare fat arms, went by the cabin, singing. + +At breakfast we heard that Chips, who had retired to his bunk for some +days past to mend a leg damaged when the hatches were in danger, had met +with a still more serious misfortune. We fell into a mood of silent and +respectful compassion. There was nothing to be said. Chips had lost his +Victoria Cross. He was an old hero in trouble. The few of us who were +British there--true, most of us were Germans, Dutchmen, Scandinavians, +and Portuguese--felt we represented The Country. Chips limped about the +forecastle with reproach in his face, and we felt we were petty in +noticing his face was also dirty, though it certainly was difficult to +avoid seeing that too, perhaps because, and this can be said for us, the +dirt was of longer standing than the reproach. Then again it is common +knowledge that Chips sleeps in straw, having no mattress. + +Chips' story we knew. It had been whispered about the ship. He was at +the Siege of Alexandria, and a shell fell near a group of men on his +ship. Chips picked it up and dropped it overboard before the fuse was +finished. The Doctor and I felt especially responsible, for a reason I +cannot easily explain, it is so vague, and we told Chips we would help +him in his search for his lost treasure. This took us to Chips' +sea-chest, and amid a group of mask-like faces--for how could foreigners +guess what this mattered to us?--we hunted carefully for Chips his +aureole. We found--but I suppose even Victoria Cross heroes must dirty +their socks. There were other things also. Yet it was out of one of +these very other things, which were, I think, shirts, that there +dropped, when the Doctor picked up the garment, a little package wrapped +in newspaper. Chips, from his berth, gave a cry of joy. The Doctor and +I, smiling too, looked upon the old man feeling that we had acted for +you all. Chips, secretive with his sacrosanct emblem, was putting the +little packet under his coverlet, when a low foreign sailor snatched it +from him. The Cross fell to the deck. I recovered it from the feet +instantly in a white passion, and chanced to look at it. It confirmed +that one, who is named Chips here, was something in the Royal and +Ancient Order of Buffaloes. + +Coming back from the fo'castle, suddenly I felt as the man of the +suburbs does when, bowed with months of black winter and work in a city +alley, he is, without any warning, transfigured on his own doorstep one +morning. There as before is his familiar shrub, dripping with rain. Yet +is it as before? It points a black finger at him. But the finger has a +polished green nail. + +He is translated. His ears are opened, and there comes for the first +time that year the silver whistle of the starlings. A touch of South is +in the air. His burden falls. + +The cloudy sky was not grey now, but pearly, for it was translucent to +the sun. More than day had come; life was born. There was ichor in the +day. They were not dark northern waves that baffled us, but we were +shoved and rocked by the send of a long nacreous ocean swell, firm but +kind, from the south-west. The iron ship which had been repulsive to the +touch, for its face had been glassy and cold, was now drying a warm rust +red, like earth of Devon in spring, and was responsive. You could rest +against its iron body and feel yourself grow. I saw the Chief outside +his cabin in his shirt sleeves, gazing overseas between the stanchions +of the boat deck, smoking in the evident luxury of full comfort and +release. Involuntarily, he danced the two-step as she rolled. "Got +anything to read?" he asked. + +Now that reminded me. We have no library, of course, but we have a +circulation of books on board. There are no common shelves; but the book +you left thoughtlessly on the skylight five minutes ago, while you went +to find some matches, is gone when you return. And you, if you see a +book lying open and unprotected in a cabin, glance round warily, dash +in, and take it; very often only to discover to your bitter +disappointment that it is one of your own, and not an adventurous and +unread stranger. The Chief's question reminded me that the day we left +Swansea a lady (and a friend of poor Jack, the public is well aware) +sent us a bale of literature. We blessed her when we saw its bulk, +looking at it as oxen might look at a truss of hay, for that was its +size and shape. Though it proved to be shavings and a cruel blow to the +animals, as you shall hear. + +Here was the very day to get at that bale, and impatiently I rolled it +into the open. It was trussed with great care, so I tore away a corner +of the wrappings, dived in a hand, and hauled out a copy of "Joy Bells +for Young Christians," the November number of 1899. + +Well. Anyhow, it was a clean copy, and I put it by as the portion of our +bald-headed German steward. + +This disappointment made me pause, though. Here was going to be a long +job for the Purser, sorting out this. Supposing there was anything +nutritious in the bale I did not mind the labour of the unpacking and +the distribution; but if the bulk of the consignment was hailed, so to +speak, by "Joy Bells," then it would be better to call a deck hand and +get the package overside before the ship was littered with too much of +this joy. A Brazilian stoker, as he passed, saw me standing in thought, +and I suppose imagined--for he could not ask--that I wanted to cut the +string, but had no knife. Before I could stop him, he, smiling a knowing +and friendly smile, whipped out a blade from his rear; and at once we +stood ankle-deep in literature. There was a landslide near me of Infant +Methodists (dates unknown) and I gave the Brazilian an armful for his +kindness. + +Our dear unknown friend at Swansea, with her eye on our sailor-like but +yet immortal souls, had heard, no doubt, at the annual meeting of the +Society for the Succor of Seamen, at Caxton Hall, Westminster (held on +the 29th of every February), what simple and barbarous and yet, in the +main, considering our origins and circumstances, what worthy fellows we +were. But she was not told at the meeting that the wealthy shipowners, +subscribers to the society, and whose presence there made Caxton Hall +seem nautical, have a way of signing on crews at continental ports +because wages rule lower there; and that consequently not one of our men +was moved by Christian English, but only by mates English, and then not +so very quickly. The officers and engineers were English, and there the +sailors' friend was right in her surmise; but I do not see how she could +have done more to put in awful jeopardy the soul of our wise and +spectacled chief engineer, for instance, than by approaching him with a +winning and philanthropic smile, under the impulse to do him good with a +statement of her religion in words of one syllable. He would have met +her politely, I know; but after she had gone---- + +Let her try to imagine her own feelings if our Chief, uninvited and +blankly unmindful, invaded the exclusive inner circle of Swansea +society, and approached her in the midst of her own with the childish +notion of instructing her in the first principles of his pronounced +Pyrrhonism; or say he went to her as a colporteur of the Society for +Instructing the Intelligence and Manners of Leisured Folk. But I must +say for our chief that this cannot be even supposed. He would never +offer the lowliest being such an indignity. + +We pulled and dragged at the escaped mass of periodicals, looking for +something good, but found no pearls had been cast before us. There were +parish magazines and temperance monthlies, there were religious almanacs +for the years we have lost; by some sporting chance there were even a +few back numbers of the "Monumental Mason." It is plain the latter could +be considered an added grievance, even though they were put in as a +kindly reminder of our narrow lease here. It was an aggravation of the +original offence to sailors who, when their short term here closes, have +to make shift with some firebars at their heels. What is Aberdeen +granite and indelible gold lettering to such men but a hint of the +hardships which follow them even beyond the end? + +So overboard went the lot--I may as well tell the whole truth, overboard +also went the evangelical hymn books, new though they were. I will only +suppress the advice cried to the gulls astern as the literature went +floating and flying in their direction. We had to rely for our reading +on what had been brought aboard by our crowd, a collection which +gradually revealed itself in single books and magazines. + +There was, for example, the "Morphology of the Cryptogamia," an +exhaustive work which gave me much pleasure in wondering how it got +aboard at all. The chief mate used it as a wedge between his open door +and the bulkhead, to prevent the miserable knocking as the ship lolled +about. He would not lend me that book, because it jammed into the +opening nicely; but I borrowed from him "Three Fingered Jack, the Terror +of the Antilles," and I made him a complete gift in return of "Robert +Elsmere" which I found marooned on a bunker hatch as I came along. There +you see the delightful chance and hazardous character of our literature. + +I prided myself on the select reading I had brought aboard with me. But +what devilish black art the sea air worked on those choice volumes, +however, I cannot explain. I have no means of knowing. But there they +are, their covers bitten by cockroaches, and the words inside bleached +and sterilised of all meaning. There they will stop; Henry James, too. +For what is the use of him when big seas are running? He would be a +magician indeed who could capture our minds then. You get the right +amplitude of leisure and the flat undistracting circumstances he +demands, the emptiness and the immobility necessary, when you are +waiting for cargo long in coming at a low seaboard. I suppose we want +the representation of life only when we are not very much alive. In +heavy weather there is no doubt old newspapers make the best reading, +especially if they have good bold advertisements. For I know it requires +the same courage and concentration needed ashore for reading Another +Great Speech by the Premier; indeed, the steel blue quality of deadly +resolution used only by men of letters who write biographies and spin +literary causeries, to manage even novels when great billows are moving. +The mind is inclined to absent itself then. Then it is you put all +reading aside with a promise of a long and leisurely festival of books +when the ship is steaming uniformly down the unvarying "trades." + +But when you get near the neighbourhood of the constant sun, during the +day you fall asleep over "Three Fingered Jack" and the old magazines +which you had on your knees while musing on the colours of the sea and +the mounting architecture of the clouds; and beyond sundown listen to +the mate's accordion or the engineer's flute. Perhaps, moved by the +hu-s-s-h of the waves, the silky and purple dark, and the loneliness of +your little company under the mid-ocean stars, tentatively (though your +shipmates are very forgiving) lift a ballad yourself; for something is +expected of you, and singing seems right. + +Of all the books aboard the "Capella" I got most out of the Skipper's +sailing directories and his charts. Talk of romance! There was that +chart-room under the bridge, across its open doors on either side +creaming waves going by in the moonlight, and the steamer inclining each +side alternately, and the shadows of the rigging sliding back and forth +on the pale deck. You cannot know what romance is till you are in seas +you have never sailed before, where the marks will be few when landfall +comes; that ocean where the Skipper is to find his own way by his lore +of the sea, and may even ask your opinion about alternatives; and there +read sailing directories. The romance of these books cannot be +translated or quoted. It would leave them, as though a glimmer went out, +if you attempted to take them from that chart-room where pendant things +are swaying leisurely, where you can hear the bells tell the watches, +and the skipper's gold-laced cap is on the mahogany table. The South +Atlantic Sailing Directions, our own guide, is fine, especially when it +gets down to the uninhabited islands in far southern latitudes. I do not +think this noble volume is included in the best hundred books, but I +know it can release the mind from the body. + +But what's this talk of landfalls? as the old man would say. There will +be no landfall yet for us; and this is Christmas Eve. I knew it was an +auspicious occasion of some kind, for the steward just went aft with two +big plum cakes cuddled in his apron. That made me look at the calendar. +We are now 800 miles out, and the steamer has reached six knots. This +was the best night we had yet found. The steamer was on an even keel, +with but occasional spasms of sharp rolling, for there was no sea, but +only old ocean breathing deeply and regularly in its sleep, and +sometimes making a slight movement. The light of the full moon was the +shining ghost of noon. The steamer was distinct but immaterial, +saliently accentuated, as a phantom. A deep shadow would have detached +the forecastle head but for a length of luminous bulwark which still +held it, and some quiet voices of men who were within the shadow, +yarning. The line of bulwark and the murmuring voices held us together. +The prow as it dipped sank into drifts of lambent snow. The snow fled by +the steamer's sides, melting and musical. Two engineers off duty leaned +on the rails amidships, smoking, looking into the vacancy in which the +moonlight laid a floor of troubled silver. As if drawn by its light a +few little clouds were poised near the moon, grouped round the bright +heart of the night. There was the moon and its small company of clouds, +and ourselves below in our own defined allotment of sea. The only thing +outside and far was Sirius, burning independently in the east, looking +unwinking through the wall of night into our world. + +On such a night and with Christmas morning but sixty minutes away it +would have been wasting life to go to bed. I glanced expectantly at the +door of the Chief's cabin, and saw indeed it was open, a yellow +rectangle within which was the profile of the Chief beneath his lamp, +talking to somebody. The Doctor was there, and he made room for me on +the settee. Then the captain joined us, and I perched myself on the +washstand. + +"Well, we can undress to-night when we turn in," said the Chief. (None +of us had, so far.) In a long silence which filled the cabin with +tobacco smoke I could hear the engines below uplifted in confident song. + +"Now they're walking round," said the Skipper, nodding his head. "Now +she feels it." + + * * * * * + +When we met thus, between the hours of nine and midnight, as was our +irregular habit, the talk first was always desultory, and about our own +ship and our own circumstances, for the concerns of our little world +strangely occupied our minds, as you would think, and the large affairs +of that great world we had left, of which we heard now no sound nor +rumour, had lessened in the mind, faded and vanished, all the huge +consequence and loud clangour of it, so that now there was an empty +horizon astern, and nothing between us and that void but a few gulls, +like small and pursuing recollections. Our little microcosm, afloat and +sundered in the wastes, was occupied in its own polity. We talked of the +carpenter's bad leg; complained of the cook's bread; heard that Tinker +the dog, being young, had the habit at night, while honest folk slept, +of eating the saloon mats; grumbled that the ship's tobacco was mouldy. +The deck was getting dry, the Skipper said, and now we could get the men +chipping it, and then it could be tarred. + +"That donkeyman," said the Skipper, "that man wastes the fresh water. +I'll have a lock put on the pump handle. He works it as if we were laid +out to the main. I spoke to him about it this morning." The fresh water +is a vital affair with us. We may not drink the water of the country to +which we are bound, so eighty tons of Welsh mountain spring is in our +cleansed and whitewashed tanks. Woe to the man caught overflowing his +can, if an officer sees him. "The handle can't be locked," said the +Chief, "because it's next to the galley. The cook wants it all day +long." + +"Well, let me catch anyone wasting it. We'd look all right with a lot of +dysentery, drinking that river water out there." + +This common meeting-place of ours, the Chief's cabin, is on a highway of +the ship, being on the direct route from the poop to the bridge, and so +it is a hostel, for the Chief is a kindly and popular man, big and +robust in body and mind; though he has a knack, at odd and unexpected +times, of being candid in a way that shocks, treading on corns without +ruth, the Skipper's particularly, when their two departments are at a +difference. + +This cabin was one which I always visited first, for, especially in the +morning when other folk had not rubbed the night out of their eyes, and +so looked darkly upon their fellows, my friend the Chief had the early +eye of a child and the soaring spirit of the lark. I never met him when +he had got out of bed on the wrong side. His cabin became a refuge to +me, for, unlike the Doctor's and my own place (we both were birds of +passage, therefore our cabins were cold and stark), the Chief's was +comfortable with settled furniture, cosy and habitable, like a fixed +home. There was a wicker chair, with cushions, and a writing-desk where +the engineer's log lay handy and bearing some plug tobacco, freshly cut, +on its cover, and a pipe rack above the desk carrying a most foul +assortment waiting their turns again for favour. Portraits of the +Chief's family were on the walls, smiling boys and girls, with their +mother in a chief place, looking upon daddy by proxy. There was a +bookshelf bearing some engineering manuals, a few novels and magazines, +a tape measure, some gauge glasses, some tin whistles, a flute, and a +palm leaf fan. Above the washstand was a rack with glasses and a carafe. +A settee ran along one side, and his bunk upon the other side. There we +sat on Christmas Eve, while the wicker chair bent and complained with +the Skipper's weight as he swayed to the leisurely rocking of the ship. +The tobacco smoke floated in coils and blue smears in the room. A bottle +of Hollands rested for security on the bed, and we held our glasses on +our knees. + +The pallid and puffy face of the steward, a very honest man secretly +free with his small store of apples on my account because I am green and +my palate not yet used to the flatness of tinned provisions, looked in +on us from the right. "Vhere is der dog, sir? I haf not seen der dog." +"Must be about," we cried. "We had seen him," we said, "nosing about the +poop for rats, or asleep on the saloon mat, or padding round the casing +looking for friends." "But no, I haf looked. He is not found. Vhere is +der dog?" A hole in our little community, it was apparent from our +intent looks, could not be thought of with equanimity. Tinker's +importance became quite large. The second engineer passed the door, +caught the drift of our anxious converse, and turned to say the dog was +then asleep in his room. "Ach! zat is all right." We struck matches for +our pipes again. + +"That dog, I shouldn't like to lose him," said the Skipper, stroking his +beard. "There's no luck in that. I shot a dog once on a ship; and first +we ran into a blow and lost a lot of gear, and then the mate got his +hand smashed, and then everything got cross-grained till I'd have paid, +ah, fifty pounds to have had the brute back again, and an ugly customer +he was. Ah, you can smile, Doctor, but there it is. I'm not +superstitious and never was. But you can't tell me. Look at the things +that happen. When I was a youngster, my ship was off Rio, and I dreamt +my father was dead. I took my bearings and the time. I dreamt my father +died in a red brick house with a laylock tree by the door and that tree +was in blossom plain enough to smell. I didn't know the house. There was +a path of clean red bricks leading up to the porch, through a garden. I +didn't see my father. But you know what dreams are like--no sense in +them--there the house was and not a soul in sight. I knew he was dying +inside it." + +"How do you account for that? Have you got it down in your books? I lay +you haven't. I forgot all about that dream. Long after I was at Cape +Town and met my brother. That reminded me. After a bit I said to him, +'Father's dead.' 'Yes,' he said, 'but how did you know?' Said I, 'Was +the house like this?' and I told him. 'Yes,' he said, 'it was like that. +A place he was staying at in Essex. But how did you know?' I didn't tell +him. What's the good? He wouldn't have believed it. People don't." + +All through the anxious time when we were being soused and buffeted I +noticed how our company, every man of them, even the Pyrrhonist, saw +omens in all the chance variety of the vast menace under the frown of +which we huddled in our iron box; porpoises alongside; one of Mother +Cary's dark brood accompanying us, glancing about the vagaries of the +flowing hills with swift precision; the form of a cloud; a loom far out, +as though day were there at least. The fall of a portrait in the Chief's +room once set him wondering and melancholy. Again, when the dog whined +and moped, the Skipper eyed the animal narrowly, as though the creature +had prescience but could tell us what it knew only by drooping and +quivering its hind quarters. You might have thought that Fate, dumb and +cruel, but a little relenting for something inevitably to come to our +mishap, were trying to stretch a point, and so induced the Skipper to +put his shirt on inside out one morning, after dreaming he saw drowned +rats, in case the horse were not too blind to see both the nod and the +wink. + +The Sphinx makes subtle dumb motions, as it were, when closely regarded. +I do not wonder if it does. Sometimes in those dark days I thought I got +a hint or two. I cannot tell you what they were. The weather grew +brighter afterwards and I forgot them. From our narrow and weltering +security, where the wind searched through us like the judgment eye, I +know, looking out upon the wilderness in turmoil where was no help, and +no witness of our undoing, where the gleams were fleeting as though the +very day were riven and tumbling, that I saw the filmy shapes of those +things which darken the minds of primitives. While the sky is changeful, +and there are storms at sea when our fellows are absent, and mischance +and death are veiled but here, we shall have gods and ghosts. The +sharp-sighted collectors of old brain-lumber and such curios may still +keep busy, and tie up their dry bundles of mythology and religions; but +I myself could make plenty more. + +So it was my shipmates' yarns were most of the dire kind, with some dim +warning precedent. I do not recall a story that was gay, except those of +the wanton sort. They were of close calls and of women, as, I suppose, +have been those of all hard livers, from the cave men on. + +Eight bells were rung on the bridge, and, like a faint echo in a higher +pitch, answered from the fo'castle. Christmas morning! By my pocket +compass we toasted the folk at home. We had heard a good many stories of +wreck this night, and the Chief was now at his contribution to the +unseasonable memories. ("I've had enough of it. Here goes," said the +Doctor; and he went.) "Don't leave us. It lets in the draught. Well, the +compliments to you. This typhoon--I had had four others--but this one +made me think it was good-bye. She was a small steamer, that 'Samuel +Plimsoll,' and old, but well-behaved. But her light nearly went out in +that blow. It was that dark you could find nothing but the noise, and we +were just the same as a chunk of wood under a waterfall, because the +Lord knows how many feet of water were in the engine-room, for she was +rolling so. Her fires were out. She had a list of 22 degrees to port. +She simply lay in it, and it went over her. Every time she rolled over +on the deep side, thinks I, this is the last of her. All this, mind you, +went on for two days, and the skipper was in the chart-room, waiting. +I've found that when the danger is not much you get excited, but when +there seems no chance you get cool and cunning and try to make one. One +time I thought she seemed easier, and I was able to get the donkey +engine going. I felt better as soon as I heard the steam, even though it +was only in the donkey. Thinks I, there's power, and it's mine--a canful +of steam to a typhoon. It was a chance to laugh at. Then I took the +other engineers with me and we went below. The water there, full of +cinders and trash, pouring through the gear as she turned from side to +side, made it look a pretty poor show. You see, the donkey wouldn't work +the pumps, for the coal and muck were sucked in. So I took a basket and +got into the tank, holding the basket under the pump. The water was up +to my neck, and every time she rolled I was ducked. But the dodge +worked, and that list of hers to port was a bit of luck in its way, for +it helped us to get the starboard boiler going. When I saw the throws +moving, and the wash angry when it splashed on the hot metal, I said, +'So much for your old typhoon.' We were not counted out then. We crawled +under the lee of an island, and lay for four days repairing her. The +funny thing was when we got to Hong Kong the papers were full of our +loss. '"Samuel Plimsoll" lost with all hands.' It was funny to see a +bill like that. I met the placard as it came running round a corner, and +it made me stand and shuffle my feet on the ground to see if the earth +was all right. I knew the editor of that paper, and I was then going up +to give him something good. And here he was making money out of us like +that. He stood at the door of his office and saw me coming. I went up +laughing, waving his paper in my hand. He looked quite surprised. His +mouth was wide open. 'You're a nice sort of chap,' I said." + + * * * * * + +Christmas Day. In case it has become necessary for me to show again the +symbols of verity, as this is a book of travel, here they are: "Lat. +37.2 N., long. 14.14 W. Light wind and moderate swell from S.W. Vessel +rolling heavily at intervals. 961 miles out. Miles by engines 226. +Actual distance travelled (because of the swell on our starboard bow) +197 miles." I cannot see that these particulars do more than help me out +with the book, but as they have been considered essential in narratives +of voyaging, here they are, and much good may they do anybody. Thoreau, +in one of his quaintly superior moods when speaking of travel, said, "It +is not worth while going round the world to count the cats in Zanzibar." +In nearly every book of travel this is proved to be true. They show it +was not worth the while, seeing it was either to shoot cats or to count +degrees of latitude. (As for me, I have no reason whatever for being at +sea.) Consider Arctic travel. I have read long rows of books on that, +but recall few emotional moments. The finest passage in any book of +Arctic travel is in Warburton Pikes' "Barren Grounds," where he quotes +what the Indian said to the missionary who had been speaking of heaven. +The Indian asked, "And is it like the land of the Musk-ox in summer, +when the mist is on the lakes, and the loon cries very often?" + +You feel at once that the country the Indian saw around him would be +easily missed by us, even when in the midst of it. For taking the +bearings of such a land, the sextant, and the miles already travelled, +would not be factors to help much. Now the Indian knew nothing of +artificial horizons and the aids to discovering where they are which +strangers use. But in summer the mists of his lakes were but the vapour +of his musings, the penumbra of the unfathomed deeps of his mind whereon +he paddled his own canoe; and when the wild-fowl called, it was his +memory heard; it was his thought become vocal then while he dreamed on. +I myself learned that the treasures found in travel, the chance rewards +of travel which make it worth while, cannot be accounted beforehand, and +seldom are matters a listener would care to hear about afterwards; for +they have no substance. They are no matter. They are untranslatable from +their time and place; and like the man who unwittingly lies down to +sleep on the tumulus where the little people dance on midsummer night, +and dreams that in the place where man has never been his pockets were +filled with fairy gold, waking to find pebbles there instead, so the +traveller cannot prove the dreams he had, showing us only pebbles when +he tries. Such fair things cannot be taken from the magic moment. They +are but filmy, high in the ceiling of your thoughts then, rosy and +sunlit by the chance of the light, transitory, melting as you watch. You +come down to your lead again. These occasions are not on your itinerary. +They are like the Indian's lakes in summer. They have no names. They +cannot be found on the best maps. Not you nor any other will ever +discover them again. Nor do they fill the hunger which sent you +travelling; they are not provender for notebooks. They do not come to +accord with your mood, but they come unaware to compel, and it is your +own adverse and darkling atoms that are changed, at once dancing in +accord with the rare incidence of that unreasonable and transcendent +moment of your world, the rhythm of which you feel, as you would the +beat of drums. + +And what are these things?--but how can we tell? A strip of coral beach, +as once I saw it, which was as all other coral beaches; but the ship +passed close in, and by favour of the hour and the sun this strand did +not glare, but was resplendent, and the colours of the sea, green, gold, +and purple, were not its common virtues, but the emotional and passing +attar of those hues. There was the long, slow labouring of our burdened +tramp in the Atlantic storm. Or one April, and a wild cherry-tree in +blossom by an English hedge, a white cloud tinctured with rose, and in +it moving a dozen tropical chaffinches; the petals were on the grass. + +And now, this is Christmas morning. I am in the Chief's bunk, and he +still sleeps on the settee. We fell asleep where we lay yarning on our +backs after midnight. I wake at the right moment, opening my eyes with +the serene and secure conviction that things are very well. The slow +rocking of the ship is perfect rest. There is no sound but the faint +tap-tap of something loose on the desk and responding to the ship's +movements. The cabin is strangely illuminated to its deepest corner by +an extraordinary light, as though the intense glow of a rare dawn had +penetrated even our ironwork. On the white top of the cabin a bright +moon quivers about, the shine from live waters sent up through the round +of our port. When we lean over, the port shows first the roof of the +alleyway dappled with bright reflections; then a circle of sky, which +the horizon soon halves; and then the dazzling white and blue of the +near waves; we reverse. + +This is life. This is what I have come for. I do not repose merely in a +bunk. I am prone and easy in the deepest assurance of good. This +conviction has penetrated even the unconsciousness of the Chief; he +snores in profound luxury. If in a ship you are brought sometimes too +cruelly close to the scrutiny of the terms of your narrow tenure, +expecting momentarily to see the document torn across by invisible +fingers, yet nowhere else do you feel those terms to be so suddenly +expanded in the sun. And nowhere else is got such release, secure and +absolute, from the nudging of insistent trifles. There is nothing +between your eyes and the confines of your own place. Empty day is all +round. In the entire circle there is not the farthest impertinent +interruption--through all the degrees there is not one fool standing in +the light; and you yourself are on nobody's horizon. No history stains +that place. There is not a black doubt anywhere. It is the first day +again, and no need yet for a rubbish heap. + +Yet when, singing to myself, I went outside to matins, I found Sandy our +third engineer with the toothache. So much of truth is got from being a +gymnosophist and regarding your own toes with aloof abstraction on a +sunny Christmas morning. I became Sandy's courage for him instead, took +his arm firmly, and led him aft to the doctor. We would start a rubbish +heap for a pristine world with a decayed tooth. Something to be going on +with. + +Seeing we were almost off Madeira we had some amount of right to the +July sun under which we had run. For the first time since the Mumbles +our decks were quite dry, and cherry red with rust. There were +glittering crusts of salt in odd places. At eight bells (midday) the +captain ordered a general holiday, except for the routine duties; and +the donkeyman appeared to startle us as the apparition of a stranger on +the ship, for he had a clean face, though his eyes still were dark and +spectral, and he wore a suit of new dungarees, stiff and creased from a +paper parcel, but just opened, out of a Swansea slop shop. His mates +were some seconds realising him. Then they made derisive signs, and the +boldest some ribald cries. I thought their resentment was really aroused +by Donkey's new shirt; it was that touch which pushed matters too far, +and made him unfriendly. He saw this himself. Soon he changed the new +shirt for one that had been rendered neutral in the stoke-hold and the +bucket. + +There was something neutral, like Donkey's old shirt, about most of our +crowd. Each one of the mob which gathered with mess kits a little before +midday about the galley door seemed reduced, was faded in a noticeable +measure from the sharp and strong pattern of a man. Their conversation +about the galley was always in subdued mutterings, not direct, but out +of the mouth corners, sideways. Their only independence was in the +negligence of their attitudes. They might have been keeping in mind an +austere and invisible presence, whose swift words from nowhere might at +any time cleave their soft babble. If I made to pass through them the +babble ceased, and from limp poses they sprang upright in the narrow way +to let me pass, their eyes cast down. A man who had not seen me coming, +but still sprawled on the rail, talking quietly, would be nudged by his +neighbour. It struck me this attitude would change when they knew us +better; but it never did. These deckhands and firemen were mostly +youngsters, steadied by a few older hands. Chips and Donkey were the +veterans. In that crowd the boatswain was the admirable figure. He was a +young Britisher, tall, upright, and weighty, with a smiling, respectful +eye in which sometimes, I thought, there was a faint hint of mockery. He +had an easy balance and confidence in his movements which made him worth +watching when about his business. Clean shaven when he came aboard, he +now had a tawny beard which caught gold lights, and it was singularly +good on his weather-darkened face. He seldom wore a cap, for it could +have added little protection to the taut vigour of his hair, and would +have spoilt, as perhaps he himself guessed, that proper flourish and +climax to the poise of his head. + +Donkey was an Irishman, and he was the huge frame of what, maybe thirty +years before, had been a powerful man. This morning his big cadaverous +face, white only on the bony ridges surrounding the depressions of the +temples, the cheeks, and the dark pits of the eyes, and with the shadowy +hollow of the mouth which gaped through the weight of the massive jaw, +would have resembled, from a little distance, that of a skeleton head of +one of the monsters in a geological gallery, but for the dewlap +sustained by sinews running from his chin down his throat. Donkey was a +silent man, and never caught your glance as you passed him, but lumbered +along with so much of the surprising celerity of a gaunt elephant that +you thought you might hear the rasp of his loose clothes. He was a +simple and docile fellow. I never heard him speak, but he used to come +to the Chief, fill the door with his massive front, his small eyes which +expressed nothing and were but sparks of life, looking nowhere in +particular, and make guttural sounds; and the Chief, being used to him, +understood. At sea Donkey did his small duties like a plain but +cumbersome mechanism that had somewhere in it an obscure point of +rationality. When ashore, though, he was said to go mad, and to roll +trampling and trumpeting through the squalid littoral of the world; +being brought aboard afterwards an enormity of lax bones and flesh, with +the cogitating glim in his bulk quite doused. + +Of the others, there was a Teutonic bunch of lads, deckhands, which I +never succeeded in segregating, they looked so much alike. They had +pimpled, idle faces, and neutral eyes, cast down when they sidled by +one, thin down on their chins, and grimy raiment which, by the look of +it, was an integument never cast after we left port. One name would have +covered that lot, and frequently I heard the mates use it. But Olsen, +the Norwegian with a blond moustache which covered his mouth like a +fog-protector, and stern blue eyes, was a sailor. The firemen made a +better bunch. There was among them a swarthy Brazilian, whose constant +smile seemed ever on the point of breaking into song, but that he was +always chewing the end of a sweat rag he wore twisted round his neck. +The happy feature of our firemen was a Dutchman, whose hollow face was +full of silent woe and endurance. He was our chief joy. When once we +found the sun, he then appeared in a single garment, trousers and braces +cut in one piece of brown canvas, hauled up well under his arms, leaving +his slab feet remote and forlorn. His torso was bare, a dancing girl in +red and blue tattooed on his chest. He wore a bowler hat without a brim. + +We will get Christmas over. It was a pagan festival. Looking back at it, +I see--with the astonishment of the sedate who is native to a +geometrical suburb where the morning train follows the night and every +numbered house shelters a moral agnostic--I see a dancing baccanal with +free gestures who fades, as I look back intently, doubting my senses, in +a roseous haze. The lawless movements of that wild, bright and laughing +figure, its exultant blasphemy, its confident mockery, are remembered by +me as though once I had been admitted to the green room of heaven. +Surely I have seen a god whose deathless knowledge derides the solemn +gods, behind the curtain. It was Christmas night, and our little +"Capella," our point of night shine, a star moving through the void to +its dark destiny, filled the vault with its song, while its fellows in +the heavens stood round. Christmas is over. + + * * * * * + +The day following was Sunday, a grey day of penance, the men soberly +washing their shirts in buckets under the forecastle head, smoking moody +pipes. The garments were tied to any convenient gear where they could +hang free. The sky was leaden. This grey day was distinguished by the +strange phenomenon of an horizon which was almost level; the skyline and +the clouds did not slant first this way, then that. The swell had almost +gone. Already I began to feel the large patience and tranquillity of a +mind losing its shadows, and contemplating the light and space of a long +voyage in which the same men do the same things in the same place daily +under the centre of the empty sky. Sitting on a hatch with the Doctor, +smoking, we confessed, with ease at the heart, and with minds in which +nervous vibrations had ceased, that we must have reached this place that +was nowhere, and that now time was not for us. We had escaped you all. +We were free. There was not anything to engage us. There was nothing to +do, and nobody who wanted us. Never before had I felt so still and +conscious of myself. I realised, with a little start of surprise, that +it was Me who felt the warm air, and who looked at the slow pulse of the +waters, and the fulgent breaks in the roof, and heard the droning of the +wake, and not that mere skin, eyes and ears which, as in London, break +in upon our preoccupied minds with agitating sensations; and I took in +this newly-discovered world of ocean and cloudland and my own sure +identity centred therein with the complacency of an immortal who will +see all the things which do not matter pass away. When we left England +we were tense, and sometimes white (though there were others who went +red) about a Great Crisis in our Country's History. The Doctor and I +arrived on board, detached from the opposing armies in the impending +conflict, and at first put our hands swiftly to our swords every ten +minutes or so during meals. Of that crisis only one small gull now was +left, and he was following us astern with a melancholy cry at intervals, +of which we took no more notice. (And that gull departed, I see by my +diary, the very next day.) + +So ended the Great Crisis. I did not even note the ship's position at +the time, though I can see now that was a serious fault for which future +historians may blame me. I can but state vaguely that it was about sixty +miles north-west of the Fortunate Isles. The change in the quality of +the sun and air became most marked; I remember that. The horizon +expanded to a surprising distance. According to letters from home, sent +about that date, which I received long afterwards, I am unable to find +that similar phenomena were witnessed in England. Probably they were but +local. These manifestations in the heavens filled the few of us +privileged to witness them with awe, and a new faith in the power and +compassion of God. Nothing further of note occurred on this day, except +that Chips, as a further miracle, suddenly was raised whole from where +he lay in his bunk with a useless leg. His leg, you may remember, was +damaged in the gale off Cornwall. The Doctor, going his rounds, was +surprised to find Chips dancing the hoola-hoola in the forecastle, and a +stoker, with a cut eye, wailing for a lost half bottle of gin taken from +his box while he was on duty. Thereafter Chips returned to work, his leg +becoming halt again only when he knew we saw him stepping it too +blithely. + + * * * * * + +"_Decr. 27._ Distance run for past 24 hours to midday 219. Total +distance 1177 miles. Fine weather. Glass rising." + +Have you ever heard of the monotony of a long voyage? The same sky you +know, the same waters, the same deck; and now I can see it should be +added, the same old self, dismayed by the contemplation of its features +daily, week after week, within that spacious empty hall, where is no +escape from the bright stare overhead which reveals your baldness and +blemishes without ruth. You get found out. You want to mix with the mob +again, to get lost in the sameness of your fellows. He who goes +travelling should leave his self at home, or as much of it as is not +wanted on the voyage. It is surprising to find how little you want of +yourself. The ideal traveller would venture out merely as a disembodied +thought, or, at most, as an eye. + +A mere eye would see no monotony, for the sky may be the same sky, but +its moods are like those of the same woman; and the ocean, though young +as the morning, is older than Asia--you never know what to expect from +that profound enigma. As for the sunny deck, I see the Doctor sitting on +a spare spar, waiting for someone to sit beside him. The Chief is filing +a piece of small gear outside his cabin. The Skipper is overlooking, +with a hard frown, a group of men busy repairing his chart-room, which +is just forward of the engine-room casing (I could get a job from him at +once for the asking, though I shall not ask). The first mate is trying +to be in three places at once. The second mate patrols the bridge. The +German steward, who tells curious stories in a Teutonised dialect of +Shadwell, is hanging mattresses and bed clothes over a boom. The men are +chipping and tarring the deck; and the boatswain, bare-legged, wildly +bearded, a sheath knife on his hams, looks like a fine pirate brought to +menial tasks. + +I have watched this day's monotonous sky onwards from the dawn. We are +in the neighbourhood of the Hesperides. For some early hours of the +morning it was grey. But the grey roof soon broke with the incumbent +weight of light, letting sunshine through narrow fractures to the sea, +far out. There were partitions of thin gold in the dim hall. The moving +floor was patterned in day and night. The low ceiling was fused where +the day poured through, became a candent vapour, volatilised. We had +over us before breakfast the ultimate blue, where a few cirrus clouds +showed its great height. + +Then it was August. The sea ran in broad heavy mounds, blue-black and +vitreous, which hardly moved our bulk. In the afternoon, the ocean, a +short distance from the ship, grew filmed and opaque, a milky blue shot +with purple shadows. Its surface, though heaving, was smooth and +flawless. No light entered its deeps, but the radiant heat was mirrored +on it as on the pallor of fluid lava. The water ploughed up by the bows +did not break, but rolled over viscidly. The sun dropped behind the sea +about a point west of our course. Night was near. Yet still the high +dome with its circular floor the sea was magically illuminated, as by +the proximity of a wonderful presence. We, solitary and privileged in +the theatre, waited expectant. The doors of glory were somewhere ajar. +The western wall was clear, shining and empty, enclosed by a proscenium +of amber flames. In the north-east, astern of us, were some high +fair-weather clouds, like a faint host of little cherubs, and from their +superior galleries they watched a light invisible to us; it made their +faces bright. Beneath them the glazed sea was coral pink. Even our own +prosaic iron gear was sublimated; our ship became lustrous and strange. +We were the Argonauts, and our world was bright with the veritable +self-radiance of a world of romance where the things that would happen +were undreamed of, and we watched for them from our argosy's side, calm +and expectant; my fellows were transfigured, looked huge, were rosy and +awful, immortals in that light no mortal is given to see. + +Now had been given me fellowship with the ship and her men; we were one +body. I had been absorbed by our enterprise. For a long while our +steamer was a harsh and foreign thing to me, unfriendly to the eye, +difficult to understand. But now she had become intelligible and proper. +She and her men were all my world, and I could find my way about that +world in the dark. Getting used to a ship has the process of the growth +of a lasting friendship. Chance begins it. You regard your luck askance, +as you accept a new acquaintance with no joy, to make the best of him. +But presently, to put the matter at its lowest, you arrive at an +understanding. You have learned your friend's worth. Familiarity would +breed contempt only in the mouse-hearted. You never have to account him +afresh, or he is no comrade; there can be no surprises again, no +encounters with a stranger in him. His value, at the least reckoning, is +that you know his value. Any hour of the day or night you can guess with +assurance where his mind would be found. And here my "Capella" has no +strange doors and startling declivities and traps for me any more. I +know her. She is not exactly all she should be, but I apprehend exactly +what she is. If I hurt myself against her it is my own fault. She is as +familiar to me as home now. I should resent any alteration. Having +learned to know her faults I like her as she is; the trestle bridge with +its sagging hand-ropes and wobbling stanchions (look out, you, when she +rolls) which crosses the main deck aft on the port side from the +amidships section, where I live, to the poop, where the Doctor lives. +The two little streets of three doors each, to port and starboard of her +amidships, the doors that open out under the shade of the boat deck to +sea. There, amidships also, are the Chief's room and the galley, the +engineers' messroom, and the engine-room entrance; but these last do not +open overside, but look aft, from a connecting alley which runs across +the ship to join the side alleyways. Forward of these cabins is the +engine-room casing, where the 'midship deck broadens, but is cumbered +with bunker hatches (mind your feet, at night, there); and beyond, +again, is the chart-room, and over the chart-room the bridge and the +wheelhouse, from which is a sheer long drop to the main deck foreward. +At the finish of that deck is an iron wall, with the entrance to the +mysterious forecastle in its centre; and over that is the uplifted head +of our world watching our course, a bleak windswept place of rails, +cable chains, and windlass. The poop has a timber deck, and there in +fine weather the deck chairs are. The poop is a place needing exact +navigation at night. Long boxes enclosing the rudder chains are on +either side of it. In the centre is the saloon skylight, the companion, +the steward's ice chest, and the hand-steering gear. Also there are two +boats. I gained my night knowledge of the poop deck by assault, and +retained my gains with sticking plaster. I am really proud of the +privilege which has been given me to roam now this rolling shadow at +night, this little dark cloud blowing between the stars and the deep, +the unseen abyss below as with its profound reverberations, and the +height above with its scattered lights as remote as the sounds in the +deeps. With calm faith in our swaying shadow I place my feet where +nothing shows, sure that my angel will bear me up. I put out my hands +and a support comes to them; the pitfalls have ladders for me, and by +touching at some places in the black shadow, as by magic, a lighted and +comfortable room at once materialises for my rest in the void. + + * * * * * + +I think I liked her better as a formless shadow after sundown. Whether +it was then a noise in my head, my tranquil thoughts murmuring in their +sleep, or whether the sound I heard was the deep humming of the world's +speed, I don't know; whatever it was, it was the only sound. Our +mainmasthead light was but a nearer star of the host. I was not +surprised to see one of the stars so close. I was within the luminous +porch of the Milky Way. + +It was midnight. In that silence, where I was alone in space, adrift on +a night cloud in the constellations, the stars were really my familiars; +once, when in London, though they had been named to me and were constant +there, they were far in the place to which one lifts one's eyes from the +dust and traffic, nothing to do with London and with me. But now there +was no more dust and traffic. I was among them at last. Splendid Orion +was near and vast in his hunting. The Pleiades no longer dimmered on the +very limit of vision, but were separate points of delicate light. The +night moved with diamond fire. + +I was so far absent from the body that a human voice beside me was like +a surprising concussion with something invisible in space. Turning, +there was the glow of Sandy's pipe. Sandy is an elderly man, and an +engineer. He was leaning over the rail, cooling after his watch below. +The magic of the star shine had got into his mind too. He began with +guesses about the things which are not known, parrying doubt with, +"Ah--but it's hard to say; there are things----"; and, "you bright young +fellers don't know everything"; and, "somebody told me a queer thing +now." + +"There was a bright young feller, same as yourself, and he was first +mate of the 'Abertawe,' out of Cardiff. Jack Driscoll was his name. It +was a funny thing happened to him. I heard about it afterwards. + +"All the girls thought Jack Driscoll was so nice. One of the girls was +his owner's daughter, and she was the best of the bunch, anyway, for she +was an only child, and her father would have given her the earth. He was +a good owner, was her father, as things go in Cardiff. Do you know +Cardiff? Well, a little goes a long way on the Welsh coast. Jack was a +smart sailor, with the first chance of the next new boat, if he watched +out. I reckon Jack was a fool. Why, he needn't have gone to sea any +more. But what did he do? + +"Jack was one of them fellers who think if they put a gold-laced cap +saucy over one ear, and laugh with the eyes, they can whistle up a +duchess. And I daresay Jack could in summer, in his white suit, when +he'd just shaved. He was a bit of all right was Jack. He was a proper +tall lad, and the way he carried himself--It was a treat to see him move +about a ship. His black hair was like one of the big fiddler chap's, and +his smile would take in one of his pals. + +"Well, it was happy days for Jack. He got good things to come to him. He +didn't have to look for 'em, like me and you. He knew his work, too. He +was a good sailor. He could get off the mark, at the first word, like a +bird, and he never left a job while there was a loose bit to it. +Sometimes when there was nothing doing it was pretty rotten, Jack would +say, to be stuck there in a Welsh tramp with a crowd of dagoes, and +drink coffee essence and condensed milk out of a pint mug, and never go +to a music hall only once in six months. Jack reckoned it would be fine +to be brass-bound always, in one of the liners, and have a deck like a +skating rink, and a lot of lady passengers who wanted a chap like him to +talk to them. + +"He could tell stories, too, on the quiet, could Jack. They were pretty +blue, though. Sailor stories. They were all about himself in the West +Coast ports. Do you know the Chili coast? Well, it's mind your eye +there, and no half larks. They're pretty handy with knives out there. +But when Jack was out for fun you couldn't stop him. He was like all you +young chaps. He wouldn't listen to sense. + +"The 'Abertawe' went light ship to Barry, one trip, from Buenos Aires, +and Jack saw her snug, and told all the men to be at the shipping office +early and sober in the morning, because they got in on a Sunday, and +Jack saw the old man safe on his way to Cardiff, and then shaved, and +sang while he was shaving. He got himself up west-end style, new yellow +boots and all, and tied his red tie Spanish fashion. And he went down +the quay, looking for anything that was about, and he felt like the best +man on the Welsh coast. + +"But Barry is a dull place. Do you know Barry? Well, it's a one-eyed +God-forsaken town, made out of odds and ends stuck down anywhere, all +new houses, docks, coal tips, and railway sidings, and nowhere to go. +It's best to stay aboard, in Barry. Jack began to feel like the only +bird on a mudbank. He got out of the town, and walked along a road till +he came to an old woman sitting in the hedge, with her back up against a +telegraph post. Her face was brown and wrinkled, and she had an +orange-coloured handkerchief round her face, and tied under her chin. +She was smoking a pipe, and looking at her blucher boots. As Jack came +along, she said, 'Tell your fortune, pretty gentleman?' Jack laughed, +and told her his face was his fortune. + +"'What do you see when you look in the glass?' said she. + +"Now that was dead easy to Jack, because he knew as well as the girls; +and he told her. There was none of your silly modesty about Jack. Then +the old woman laughed; but I reckon Jack thought she was only pleased +with him, because he made it a point to make the mothers and the +grandmothers smile, the same as the girls. + +"'What do you see in this glass?' said she to Jack. She was fumbling in +her dress, and hauls out a mirror like you see in the old-fashion shops, +a mirror made of silver, and it had a frame of ebony. She polished it on +her skirt, and gave it to him, and told him to pass a bit of silver with +the other hand. Well, Jack saw sport, and he could always pay for that, +and he did what she said. But he only saw himself in the mirror. + +"'Hi,' said Jack, 'here, what's your little game now? None of your larks +now,' he said, 'or I'll ask a policeman what he can see in this tin +glass of yours.' + +"'You and your policeman,' she said. 'Look now, my dandy boy, and see +more than your money's worth.' And she rubbed the glass again. Then Jack +took another look. It was a dull day, but that mirror was bright with +sunshine. There was something funny about that mirror. He saw a fine +place in it, all cool and white and gold, like you see out East. It was +a palace, I reckon. There was a fountain in the middle, and some girls +with not a lot on, like some of the Amsterdam postcard girls, were lying +around, just anyhow. And there was Jack's own self among 'em, and they +were laughing and talking to him. It was fine. Jack turned his head, +just like you would do, to see if the real place was behind him. But, of +course, there was the funnels and topmasts of Barry, and the sky looked +like rain. I bet it gave him a shock. + +"'Now you've seen what'll be your luck, honey, if you're not careful,' +said the old woman. 'Mind your eye,' she said, 'mind your eye, you with +the saucy face. What's more,' she called after him, 'don't you speak to +the girl with the odd eyes in Cardiff, though I know you will, and sorry +you'll be.' + +"'Go to the devil,' said Jack. + +"He was just like all you young chaps. Thought she was an artful old +shark who'd got his money dead easy. That's what you always think. If +you don't understand anything, then there's nothing in it. You call in +at the next pub and chatter to the barmaid. What happened? Why, the very +next day the Skipper came back, and told him the new boat was near +ready, and the owner wanted to see him. Jack went, and forgot about +everything, except that he was going to be the handsome boy all right +with the owner's own daughter to look at him. A pretty girl she was too. +I saw her once, holding up her skirts off the deck while she looked +round. The Skipper introduced me. 'Good morning, Mr. Brown,' she said to +me. + +"Coming out of the Great Western Station at Cardiff Jack saw a place +he'd never noticed before. It wasn't Cardiff style. 'It's a new place,' +Jack thinks to himself, 'and a ripping good place it looks,' for he was +thirsty, and there was plenty of time. 'It must have been run up since I +was here last,' says Jack to himself, 'though that's queer, for I reckon +it'd take years to rig up a dandy show of this sort.' But in he went. + +"He was surprised, when he got in, and so would you have been. It was +like the place I saw on the stage at London once. It was in Aladdin, at +a place in the Mile End Road. You know what those things are like, when +the curtain goes up. You can see a long way, but you can't see all the +way. You expect something to happen there. It was full of pillars, all +white and gold, in a pink light. There was a lot of ladies and gentlemen +sitting on sofas full of cushions, talking, and they were too grand to +even notice Jack as he stood there looking round for a chair. But it +took a lot to get on Jack's nerves. There was one girl in a white silk +dress, with red roses in her golden belt, and she had a white hat with +red roses in that, and she looked like a summer day. Jack was glad to +see that the only vacant chair was at a table where she sat alone. Of +course, over there goes Jack. The place was as quiet as a church before +the service begins. There was only a faint whispering. He got to where +the girl sat, as if she was waiting for him. She looked up and smiled at +Jack. Jack sat down beside her and said what a fine day it was. She had +a face the colour of moonlight, and her eyes were odd. But there wasn't +a girl who could make Jack wonder if his tie was straight, in those +days, and he began to order things, and talk. + +"Once he took a look round, leaning back in his chair, feeling pretty +large, and he noticed the other people were looking at him artful-like, +out of the corners of their eyes, as if he was talking too loud. But +Jack thought he'd jolly well talk as he liked, and he'd got just the +best girl in that room or anywhere else. He looked at his watch. It was +near twelve o'clock. He had to be at his owner's by one. There was +plenty of time. + +"The drink had a funny taste, but it was the best liquor he'd ever had. +He marked down that place. He didn't know there was a show like that in +Cardiff. He caught hold of the girl's hand, which he noticed was white, +and very cold, and pretended he wanted to look at her ring. There was a +stone in the ring, just like a bit of soda. She asked him to try it on +his own finger, because the stone changed colour then, but Jack couldn't +get the ring off till he'd placed her finger to his lips, to moisten the +ring. He was the boy, was Jack, to see things didn't drag along. When he +got the ring on his finger the stone was full of red fire. So the time +went; but he forgot all about time, and the owner, and the owner's +daughter, and everything. The girl's hair was scented, too, and it was +close to him. + +"Presently he looked up, and saw what he'd never noticed before. He +could see further into the building than ever. There seemed to be a +garden beyond, full of sunshine, and all the men and women were walking +that way, talking loud, and laughing. His own girl got up too, and said, +'Come along, Jack Driscoll,' and he never even wondered how she knew his +name, nor why her face was like snow by moonlight, nor why she smiled +like that. + +"No. Not Jack. All he thought was what a ripping garden that was, with +palms, and marble courts, like you see in the East. There was music far +away, two notes and a drum, like you hear in a native dance, before the +dancers come. It made Jack feel like a millionaire or a lord, able to do +anything, but just then only wanting a good time. Then he noticed they +were alone in the garden, which was full of trees in blossom. All the +other people had gone. There was only that music. The place was very +quiet. He could hear water tinkling in a fountain, and he reckoned he +would stay there till closing time. The girl talked to him in whispers, +and he put his arm around her. I don't know how long he stayed there, +but he kept telling the girl she was the best girl he'd ever had, and +he'd never had such a good time in his life. + +"It was funny the way he got out. Jack reckoned in there that the world +would never come to an end, like young fellers do, when they're enjoying +themselves proper. But once he took her ring off his finger, to have +another look at it. Then he was in the street again, looking up at a +building which had its doors shut, and Jack only thought he was looking +there for a number he wanted. + +"It had started to rain. He looked at his watch. It was just twelve +o'clock. He didn't know what he wanted with an address in that street, +so he started off in a hurry for his owner's house, feeling pretty +stiff, as if he'd been sleeping rough. When he got to his owner's house, +he rang the bell. + +"The owner's daughter came to the door, and looked at him like she +didn't know him, and was a bit afraid of him. 'No, thank you,' she said +kindly, 'not to-day.' And shut the door at once. + +"What puzzled Jack was that he didn't feel surprised and angry. He +turned and went down those steps again, and down the street, thinking it +over. He looked back at the house. Yes, that was the house all right. +And that was Annie all right. Well, what the devil was the matter with +him? There was a public-house at the corner, and he stopped there, +thinking things over, and staring at the window. Then he saw his face in +a mirror, and shouted so that the barman came and ordered him out of +that, sharp now. But he kept looking at the glass, not believing his +eyes. He knew his own face again, but only just knew it. His eyes were +dull and red and gummy, same as those old men have who've lived too +long, and his face was puffed and pimpled, and he had a lousy white +beard." + + + + +II + + +December 28. Lat. 39.10 N., long. 16.3 W. Course, S.W. 1/2 west. We are +nearing the tropics. Now the ship has such a complete set of grumblers, +good fellows who know their work better than anyone less than God, that +our great distance at sea is plain. Our men, casually gathered and +speaking divers tongues, detached from earth and set afloat on a mobile +islet to mix on it if they can, have become one body to deal with the +common enemy. We are corporate to face each trouble as it meets us, and +free to explain afterwards how much better we should have done under +another captain. The skipper knows this broad spirit now possesses us, +and so is contented and blithe, wearing only on deck that weary look +which is the sober badge of high office, as though he were an +unfortunate man to have us about him, we being what we are, but that he +would do his best with the fools, seeing we are in his charge. + +This morning at six, hearing the men at the hosepipes giving the decks +their daily wash, I tumbled out for a cold tub. This is a simple affair. +You leave the cabin with a towel about you, stand in a clear space, and +rotate before the hydrant, to general cheering. A hot bath on the +"Capella" is not so easy, because, although there is a bath-room aboard, +it has become a paint locker. One must descend into the engine-room, +after warning the engineer on duty, who then will have ready a barrel, +filled from the boilers. The ingenious man will fix a shower bath also. +This is a perforated meat tin, hanging from a grating above the tub, and +connected with a pump. After a hot bath in the engine-room, where the +temperature was often well over 120 deg., that shower of cold sea water +would strike loud cries from any man whose self-control was uncertain. + +This morning was the right prelude to the tropics. This was the morning +when, if our planet had been till then untenanted, a world unconsummated +and waiting approval, the divine approval would have come, and a child +would have been born, an immortal, the offspring of Aurora and the Sea +God, flame-haired and lusty, with eyes as bright as joy, and a rosy body +to be kissed from toes to crown. The dancing light, and the warm shower +suddenly born alive in it from one ripe cloud, the golden air, the waves +of the north-east trades, the seas of the world in the first dawn, +moving along like a multitude released to play, their blue passionate +and profound, their crests innocent and dazzling, made me think I might +hear faint cheering, if I listened intently. In the west was a steep +range of cloudland rising from the sea, and against it was inclined the +flame of a rainbow. There was that rainbow, as constant as the pennant +hoisted over an uplighted occasion. The world's noble emblem was aloft. +I demanded of the Skipper if he would run up our ensign in reply to it; +but he only peered at me curiously. + +The heat increased with the day. We had run well down from the bleak +apex of the world with its nimbus of fogs. Here was the entrance to the +place where our youthful dreams began. I recognised it. Every feature +was as we both have seen it from afar, across the roofs from our outlook +in the arid city when the path to it had appeared as hopeless to our +feet as the path to the moon. This pioneer can assure his fellows whose +bright illusions grow fainter with age that their dreams must be +followed up, to be reached. + +At midday we began to cast clothes. As to the afternoon, of that I +remember the less. There was the chief's empty bunk, so much more +alluring than my own. Into that I climbed, my mind steeled against +drowsy weakness. I would digest my dinner with a book, eyes sternly +alert. + +The "Capella" rocked slowly, a big cradle. My body was lax and +responsive. There was about us the silent emptiness which is far from +the centres where many men believe it is necessary to get lots of things +done. The Chief suspired on his settee. The waves were singing to +themselves. A ray of light laughed in my eyes, playing hide and seek +across the wisdom of my book.... I put the book down. + +As you know, where I had come from we do not dare to sleep during +daylight without first arguing with the conscience, which usually we +fail to convince. This comes of our mental trick which takes a pleasure +we wholly desire and puts on it a prohibitive label. Self-indulgence, +you understand; softening of the character; courage, brothers, do not +stumble. The solemn forefinger wags gravely in our faces. Before I fell +asleep, my habit, born of the hard grey weather which makes an +Englishman hard and prosperous, did come with its admonitory forefinger. +Remembering that I was secure in a sunnier world I cried out with ribald +mockery across the abyss I had safely crossed, knowing my old self could +not follow, and shut my eyes happily. And also, let me say--sitting up +again with an urgent afterthought, which I must get rid of before I +sleep--if this were not a plain narrative of travel without any wise +asides I would get off the "Capella" here to argue that what all you +fellows want in the place I have luckily left is not more +self-restraint, in which wan virtue you have long shown yourselves to be +so proficient that our awards for your merit have overcrowded the +workhouses, but more rollicking self-indulgence and a ruddy and bright +eyed insistence on the means to it. Look at me now in this bunk! Not +since I was last in a cradle have I felt the world would buoy me up if I +dared to shut my eyes to affairs while the sun was shining. But I am +going to try it again now, and risk my future. I repeat, I would argue +this with you, only I want to sleep.... + +It is worth recording that when I awoke I found nothing had happened to +me, except benefit. The venture can be made safely. Others had kept the +course for me. The ship had not stopped. Through the door I could see a +half-naked, blackened, and sweating stoker, who had been keeping the +fires while I slept, and he was getting back his breath in loud sobs. +Something had made him sick. These stupid and dirty men will drink too +much while they are attending to the furnaces. They have been warned of +the danger, of which they take no heed, and so they have to suffer. On +the poop was the second officer, busy in the hot sun with a gang, +overhauling a boat. And I found, on enquiry, that a man was still at the +wheel. So thereafter, while in the land of the constant sun, I slept +every afternoon, and was never a penny the worse. Somehow, you know, +things went on. I think I shall become one of the intelligent leisured +class. + +It was within an hour of midnight. The moon had set. I was idling +amidships about the ship's shadowy structure when I was asked to take +charge of the bridge till eight bells. The second mate was ill, and the +first mate was asleep through overwork. The skipper said he would not +keep me up there long. I had but to call if a light came into view, and +to keep an eye on the wheelhouse. Ah, but it is long since I played at +ships, and was a pirate captain. I remembered there are dull folk who +wonder what it feels like to be a king. The king does not know. Ask the +small boy who is surprised with an order to hold a horse's head. I took +my promotion, mounting the steep ladder to the open height in the night. + +I felt then I was more than sundered from my kind. I had been taken and +placed remotely from the comfort of the "Capella's" isolated community +also. There was me, and there were the stars. They were my nearest +neighbours. I stood for you among them alone. When the last man hears +but does not see the deep waters of this dark sphere in that night to +which there shall be no morning sun, he shall know what was my sensation +aloft in the saddle of the "Capella"; the only inhabitant of a congealed +asteroid off the main track in space, with the sun diminished to a point +through travel, and the Milky Way not reached yet; though I could see we +were approaching its bay of light. An appreciable journey had been made. +But by the faintness of its shine there was a timeless vacancy to be +travelled still. We should make that faint glow, that congregation of +suns, that archipelago of worlds; though not yet. But had we not all the +night to travel in? The night would be long. We should not be disrupted +any more by the old day. The final morning had passed. I had no doubt +the drift of the dark lump to which I clung in space, while my hair +streamed with our speed, would at length reach the bright fraternity, no +more than a dimmer of removed promise though it seemed. + +A bell rang beside me in the night. It was answered at once from +somewhere ahead. Others, then, were journeying with me. The void was +peopled, though the travellers were all invisible; and I heard a +confident voice call, "Lights are burning bright." The lights were. I +could see that. But when the profundities are about you, and you think +you are alone in outer night, that is the kind of word to hear. Joyously +I shouted into what seemed to be boundless nothing, "All Right!" + + * * * * * + +One dayfall we saw the Canary Islands a great distance on the port beam. +I do not know which day it was. The Hesperides were as blurred as the +place in the calendar. The days had run together into a measureless +sense of well-being. We had passed the last of the trivial allotments of +time. The islands loomed, and I wondered whether that land was the hint +of something in a past life which the memory saw but could not shape. +Whatever was there it was too long forgotten. That apparition which a +whisper told me was land faded as I gazed at it overseas, lazily trying +to remember what it once meant. It was gone again. It was no matter now. +Perhaps I was deceiving myself. Perhaps I had had no other life. This +"Capella," always under the height of a blue dome, always the centre of +a circular floor of waters, waters to be seen beating against the steep +and luminous walls encompassing us, though nowhere finding an outlet, +was all my experience. I could recall only the faintest shadows of a +past into that limpid present. I could see nothing clearly that was not +confined within the dark faultless line where the sky was inseparably +annealed to the sea. Here I had been always. All I knew was this length +of sheltered deck, and those doors behind me where I leaned on a rail +between the stanchions, doors which sheltered a few familiars with their +clothes on hooks, their pipe racks, and photographs of women, a length +of deck finishing on either hand in two iron ladders, the ladder +forward, just past the radiation and coal grit by the engine-room +casing, descending to a broad walk which led to the forecastle head, +that bare outlook always at a difference with the horizon; and the +ladder aft going down to another broad walk, sticky with new tar, where +the bulwarks were as high as the breast, and Tinker, the dog, glad of a +word from you, trotted about the rusty winches and around the hatches; +and that walk aft finished in the door of the alleyway opening upon the +asylum of the doctor's cabin, and the saloon, the skipper's sanctum, and +the domain of the friendly steward. There was the smell of the cargo +drawing from the ventilators on the deck, when you went by their trumpet +mouths. There was the warm oily gush of air from the engine-room +entrance. And in the saloon alleyway I used to think the store of +potatoes, right behind, was generating gases. (But nobody knows every +origin of the marine smells.) Well, here were all the things my senses +apprehended. I could walk round my universe in five minutes. And when I +had finished I could do it again. Here I had been always. Nothing could +be clearer than that. Looking out from my immediate circumstances I saw +no entrance to the place where we were rocking, the place where the +"Capella" was alone. The walls of the enclosure were flawless. There was +not a door through them anywhere. There was not a rift in the precision +of the dark circle about us where one could crawl out between the sky +and the sea. + +There we indubitably were though, and I dwelt constantly on the miracle +of that lucky existence. I could not doubt that we were there. Yet how +had we got there? I leave that to the metaphysicians. There we were; and +no man who merely trusted his experience could explain our presence. +There was some evidence to my simple mind that such a life in such +surroundings perchance was the gift of the gods, and that we could never +get any nearer the limits of the world in which we had been placed to +see what was beyond, could never approach that enclosure of blue walls +where the distant waves, which beat against them, could not get out. +Morning after morning I watched them, the dark leaping shapes of the far +rebels, mounting their prison at its base, and collapsing, beaten. + +The seas never changed. They followed us and the wind, a living host, +the blue of their slopes and hollows as deep as ecstasy, their crests +white and lambent. They were buoyant, they were leisurely, they were the +right companions of travel. They just kept pace with us. They ran after +us like happy children, as though they had been lagging. They came abeam +to turn up to us their shining faces, calling to us musically, then +dropping behind again in silence. When I looked overside into the +pellucid depths, peering below the surface in long forgetfulness, +leaving the body and gliding the mind in that palpable and hyacinthine +air beneath us where the sunken foam dimmered in pale clouds, I felt +myself not afloat but hovering in the midst of a hollow sphere filled +with light. The blue water was only a heavier and a darker air. I had no +weight there. I was only a quiet thought tinctured with the royal colour +of the space wherein I drifted. + +The upper half of the sphere was blue also, but of a different blue. The +rarer and more volatile ether was above us. The sea was its essence and +precipitate. The sea colour was profound and satisfying; but the colour +of the sky was diffused, as though the heaven were an idea which was +beyond you, which you stood regarding, and azure were it symbol, and +that by concentration you might fathom its meaning. But I can report no +luck from my concentrated efforts on that symbol. The colour may have +been its own reward. + + * * * * * + +Every morning after breakfast the Skipper and the Doctor made a visit to +the forecastle. Then, after the Doctor had carefully searched his dress +for insects, we spent the day together. We mounted the forecastle to +begin with, watching the acre of dazzling foam which the "Capella's" +bows broke around us. Out of that the flying fish would get up, just +under us, to go skimming off, flights of silver locusts. This reminded +the surgeon that we might try for albacore and bonito, which would be a +change from tinned mutton. The Skipper found a long fir pole, to which +was attached sixty fathoms of line, with a large hook which we covered +with a white rag, lapping a cutting of tin round the shank. When this +object was dropped over the stern in its leaps from wave to wave it bore +a distant resemblance to a flying fish. The weight of the trailing line, +breaking a cord "tell-tale," frequently gave us false alarms and long +tiring hauls. But on the second day the scaffold pole vibrated to some +purpose, and we knew we were hauling in more than the bait. We got +aboard a coryphene, the dolphin of the sailors. It gave us in its death +agony the famous display, beautiful, but rather painful to watch, for +the wonderful hues, as they changed, stayed in the eye, and sent to the +mind only a message of a creature in a violent death struggle. + +The contours of this predatory fish express extraordinary speed and +power, and its armed mouth has been upturned by Providence the better to +catch the flying fish as they drop back to sea after an effort to escape +from it. But Providence, or evolution, had never taught the coryphene +that there are times when the little flying fish, as it falls back +exhausted, may be a rag of white shirt and a scrap of bright tin ware +with a large hook in its deceptive little belly. So there the dolphin +was, glowing and fading with the hues of faery. Its life really +illuminating it from within. As its life ebbed, or strove convulsively, +its colours waned and pulsed. It was gold when it came on board, and +darkened to ultramarine as it thrashed the deck, and its broad dorsal +fin showed violet eyes. Its body changed to a pale metallic green; and +then its light went out. + +Now as I look back upon the "Capella" and her company as they were in +that period of our adventure when our place was but somewhere in +mid-ocean between Senegambia and Trinidad, I see us but indifferently, +for we are mellowed in that haze in which retrospection just discerns +those affairs, long since accomplished, that were not altogether +wearisome. It is better to go to my log again, for there the matter was +noted by the stub of a pencil at the very time, and when, unless a +beautiful mist was seen, it had not the remotest chance of being +recorded. When I turn to the diary for further evidence of those days of +blue and gold in the north-east trades its faithfulness is seen at once. + +"_30 Decr._ A grey day. The sun fitful. Wind and seas on the port +quarter, and the large following billows occasionally lopping inboard as +she rolled. The decks therefore are sloppy again. We had a sharp +reminder at six bells that we are not bound to any health resort, as +Sandy put it. We were told to go aft, where the doctor would give each +of us five grains of quinine. This is to be a daily rite. To encourage +the men to take the quinine it is to be given to them in gin. Being +foreigners, they did not understand the advice about the quinine, but +they caught the word gin quite well, and they were outside the saloon +alleyway, a smiling queue, at the stroke of eleven. I went along to see +the harsh truth dawn on them. The first man was a big German deckhand. +He took the glass from the doctor. His shy and puzzled smile at this +unexpected charity from the skipper dissolved instantly when the quinine +got behind it. His eyes opened and stared at nothing. To the surprise of +his fellows he turned violently to the ship's side, rested his hands on +it, and spat; spat carefully, continuously and with grave deliberation. + +"Distance run since noon yesterday 230 miles. Actual knots 9,5. Total +distance 2072 miles. There was not a living thing in sight to-day; not +even a flying fish. + +"The night is fine and starlit, the Milky Way a brilliant arch from east +to west, under which we are steaming. When Venus rose she was a tiny +moon, so refulgent that she gave a faint pallor to a large area of sky, +outlined the coast of a cloud, and made a broad shining path on the sea. +The moon rose after nine, veiled in filmy air, peeping motionless at the +edge of a black curtain. + +"The moon later was quite obscured, and the steamer ceased to exist +except where in my heated cabin the smoky oil lamp showed me my dismal +cubicle. I went in and sat on the mate's sea chest. The mate was on +duty. On the washstand was his mug of cocoa, and on top of the mug two +thick sandwiches of bread and meat. That food was black with +cockroaches. The oil lamp stank but gave little light. The engines were +throbbing, and out of the open door I saw the gleam of the wash, and +heard its harassing note. I could not read. I loathed the idea of +getting into the hot bunk and lying there, stewing, a clear keen, +clangour of thoughts making sleep impossible. The mate appeared, drove +off the cockroaches cheerfully, examined the sandwiches for +inconspicuous deer, opening each to make sure, and then muffled himself +with one. My God! I could have killed him with these two hands. What +right had he to be cheerful? But he is such a ginger-headed boy, and to +break that unconsciously happy smile of his would be sacrilege. Besides, +he began to tell me about his sweetheart. Her portrait hangs in our +cabin. It is an enlargement. You pay for the frame, and the +photographer, overjoyed I suppose, gives you the enlargement. I prefer +the second engineer's sweet-hearts, who are in colours, and are Dutch +picture postcards and cuttings from French comic papers; and he calls +them his recollections of Sundays at home. I listened, patient and kind, +to the second mate's reminiscences of rapturous evening walks under the +lamps of Swansea with this girl in the picture--no doubt it eased his +heart to tell me--till I could have howled aloud, like the dog who hears +music at night. Then I broke away, and ran to the chief's cabin for +sanctuary. + +"The Chief was making an abstract, and was searching through his log for +ten tons of coal which were missing. In the hunt for the lost coal I +lost myself. I grew excited wherever a thick bush of figures promised +the hidden quarry; and in an hour's search found the strayed tons in +hiding at the bottom of a column. They had been left there, and not +transported into the next. Again the dread of that bunk had to be faced +and dealt with. I stood at the chief's door, knocking out my pipe, +looking astern into the night, looking to where Ursa-Major, our +celestial familiar of home, was low down and preparing to leave us +altogether to the strange and perhaps unlucky gods of other skies. O the +nights at sea! + +"_31 Decr._ Wakened with my heart jumping because of a devastating sound +without. In the early morning, Tinker was being thrashed by the Old Man +for eating the saloon mats. When at 11.30 the men congregated amidships +with their tins for dinner the sun was a near furnace and the breeze a +balm. The white of the ship is now a glare, and the sea foam cannot be +looked at. Donkey lumbered out of his place where he attends to the +minor boiler, his face the colour of putty, and held to a rail, gazing +out with dead eyes overside, gasping. He declared he couldn't stick his +job. The flying fish are getting up in flights all day long. I saw one +fish go a distance of about fifty yards in a semi-circle, making a bight +in the direction of the wind. We caught another large coryphene to-day, +and had him in steaks for tea. He was much better cooked than the last, +which had the texture of white wool; and to increase our happiness the +cook had not given us sour bread. At midday we were 17.22 N. and 33.27 +W. + +"I had a lonely evening with the chief. This is New Year's eve. We +talked of the East India Dock Road, and of much else in London Town. At +eight bells, when we held up our glasses in the direction of Polaris, +the moon was bright and the waters hushed. Then we took each a hurricane +lamp, and went about the decks collecting flying fish for breakfast, +finding a dozen of them. + +"_1 Jan._ The uplifted splendour of these days persists; but the +splendour sags now a little at midday with the weight of the heat. The +poop deck is now sheltered with an awning; and lying there in lazy +chairs, with a wind following and barely overtaking us, idly watching +the shadows of the overhead gear move on the bright awning as the ship +rolls, is to get caught in the toils of the droning wake, and to sleep +before you know you are a prisoner. The wake itself, in these seas, when +the sun is on it, a broad road going home straight and white over the +hills, the road which is not for us, is one of the good things of the +voyage. Straight beneath the rail the wake is an upheaval of gems, +sapphires, emeralds, and diamonds, always instantly melting in the sun, +always fusing and fleeting in swift coils of malachite and chrysoprase, +but never gone. As you watch that coloured turmoil it draws your mind +from your body. You feel your careless gaze snatched in the revolving +hues speeding astern, and your consciousness is instantly unwound from +your spinning brain, and you are left standing on the ship, an empty +spool. + +"Under the awning at night, to the Doctor and to me, the first mate +played his accordion. He is a little Welshman, this mate, with a +childish nose and a brutish moustache, and in his face is blended a +girlish innocence of large affairs, and the hirsute nature of the adult +male animal, a nature he relieves on the "Capella" with bawdy talk and +guffaws. He played 'Come, Birdie, Come,' and things like that, and then +told us some Monte Videan stories. As they were true stories about +himself and other young sailors they ought really to be included in a +faithful diary of a sea voyage, yet as I cannot reproduce the Doctor's +antiseptic judgment, of which I know nothing but the glow of his pipe in +the unresponding dark at the end of the stories--the last titter of the +mate had died away--it is better to leave this matter alone. + +"_3 Jan._ The hottest day we have had. I descended at midday to the +engines to see Sandy at work with his shining giants. Standing on the +middle platform, while he was shouting his greetings to me over the +uproar, I felt the heat of the grating through my boot soles, and +shifted. The temperature there was 122 deg.. Sandy was but in his drawers +and a pair of old boots, and the tongues of the boots, properly, were +hanging out. His noble torso was glistening with moisture, and as I +talked, energetically vaulting my words above the roar of the crank +throws in that hot and oleaginous place, the perspiration began a sudden +drop from my own face and hands, and in a copious way which startled me. +For a time I had some difficulty in breathing, as though in a vacuum, +but gradually forgot this danger of suffocation in the love of the +artist Sandy showed while offering me the spectacle of 'his job.' I +think I understood him. At first one would see no order in that haze of +rioting steel. The massive metal waves of the shaft were walloping and +plunging in their pits with an astonishing bird-like alacrity; about +fifteen tons of polished steel were moving with swift and somewhat awful +desperation. The big room shook and hummed with the vigour of it. But +order came as Sandy talked, and presently I found the continuous +thunder, that deadening bass of the crank throws, seemed to lessen as we +conversed, sitting together on a tool chest. Our voices easily +penetrated it. And listening more attentively at length I found what +Sandy said was true, that each tossing and circling part of the +room-full could be heard contributing its strident or profound note to +the chorus, and each became constant and expected, a singing personality +which was heard through the others whenever listened for. Above all, at +regular intervals, a rod rang clear, like the bell in Parsifal; yet, +curiously enough, Sandy declared he could not catch that note, though it +tolled clear and resonant enough in my ears. The skylight was so far +above us that we got little daylight. Hanging from the gratings in a few +places, some black iron pots, shaped like kettles, had cotton rags in +their spouts, and were giving us oil flares instead. The terrific +unremitting energy of the ponderous arms, moving thunderously, and still +with a speed which made tons as aery as flashes of light; and Sandy in +the midst of it, quick in nothing but his eyes, moving about his raging +but tethered monsters cock-sure and casual, rubbing his hands on a pull +of cotton waste, putting his ear down to listen attentively at a +bearing, his face turned from a steel fist which flung violently at his +head, missed him, and withdrew to shoot at him again, gave me the first +distinct feeling that our enterprise had its purpose powerfully +energised and cunningly directed. I felt as I watched the dance of the +eccentrics and the connecting rods that our ship was getting along +famously. I think I detected in Sandy himself a faint contempt for the +chap at the upper end of the telegraph. I stayed two hours, and then my +shirt was as though I had been overboard; and ascending a greasy and +almost perpendicular series of ladders to the upper world, I discovered, +from the drag of my feet and the weight of my body, that I had had just +as much of an engineer's watch in the tropics as I could stand. There +was a burst of cool light. The tumult ceased; and again there was the +old "Capella" rocking in the singing seas, for ever under the tranquil +clouds. We had stopped again. + +"_4 Jan._ A moderate north-east wind and sea, and a bright morning; but +far out a dark cloud formed, and drew, and driving towards us, covered +us presently with a blue-black canopy. The warm torrent fell with +outrageous violence, and for all we could see of our way the "Capella" +might have been in a dense fog. The mosquito curtains were served out +to-day, and we amused ourselves draping our bunks. Later, the weather +cleared. The night was stiflingly hot; and in that reeking bunk, with an +iron bulkhead separating me from the engine room, it was like lying on +the shelf of an oven. Though wide open on its catch, the door admitted +no air, but did allow a miserable tap-tapping as the ship rolled. At +eleven o'clock a pale face floated in the black vacancy of the door, and +I could see the Doctor peering in to find if I were awake. 'I say, +Purser, I can't sleep. Will you come and have a gossip, old dear?' We +went aft in our pyjamas, the Doctor cleared away bottles and things from +his settee, and we disembarked from the 'Capella,' visiting other and +distant stars, returning to our own again not before three next morning. + +"_5 Jan._ We seem to have got to a dead end of the trade winds. The heat +of the forenoon was oppressively humid and dinner was nearly lost +through it. The cook, a fair and plump Dutchman, broke down in the midst +of his pans, and was carried out to find his breath again. This poor +chef is up at four o'clock every morning coffee making; is working in +the galley, which is badly ventilated, all day, getting two hours' rest +in the early afternoon. Then he goes on till the saloon tea is over; +when he begins to bake bread. He fills in his leisure in peeling +potatoes. + +"All round the horizon motionless and permanent storm clouds are banked. +Their forms do not alter, but their colours change with the hours. They +seem to encompass us in a circular lake, a range of precipitous and +intricately piled Alps, high and massive. Cleaving those steeps of +calamitous rocks--for so they looked, and not in the least like +vapour--are chasms full of night, and the upper slopes and summits are +lucent in amber and pearl. In the south and east the ranges are indigo +dark and threatening, and the water between us and that closed country +is opaque and heavy as molten lead. Across the peaks of the mountains +rest horizontal strata of mist. Some petrels were about to-day. The +evening is cool, with a slight head breeze." + + * * * * * + +After weeks at sea, imprisoned within the walls of the sky, walls which +have not opened once to admit another vessel to give the assurance of +communion, you begin to doubt your direction and destination, and the +possibility of change. Only the clouds change. The ship is no nearer +breaking that rigid circle. She cannot escape from her place under the +centre of the dome. The most cheering assurance I had was the pulse of +the steamer, felt whenever I rested against her warm body. Purposeful +life was there, at least. Though the day may have been brazen, and +without a hint of progress, and the sea the same empty wilderness, yet +when most disheartened in the blind and melancholy night I felt under me +the beatings, energetic and insistent, of her lively heart, some of that +vitality was communicated, and I got sleep as a child would in the arms +of a strong and wakeful guardian. + +Poised between two profundities--though nearer the clouds, cirrus and +lofty though they are, than the land straight beneath the keel--and with +morning and night the only variety in the round, the days flicker by +white and black like a magic lantern working without a story. Tired of +watching for the fruits of our enterprise I went to sleep. Old Captain +Morgan must have lived a dull life, monotonous with adventure. What is +the use of travel, I asked myself. The stars are as near to London as +they are to the Spanish main. In their planetary journey through the +void the passengers at Peckham see as much as their fellows who peer +through the windows in Macassar. The sun rises in the east, and the moon +is horned; but some of the passengers on the mudball, strangely enough, +take their tea without milk. Yet what of that? + +In the chart room some days ago I learned we had 3000 fathoms under us. +Well; these waves of the tropics, curling over such abysmal deeps, look +much the same as the waves off Land's End. I began to see what I had +done. I had changed the murk of winter in London for the discomforts of +the dog days. I had come thousands of miles to see the thermometer rise. +Where are the Spanish Main, the Guianas, and the Brazils? At last I had +discovered them. I found their true bearings. They are in Raleigh's +"Golden City of Manoa," in Burney's "Buccaneers of America," with Drake, +Humboldt, Bates, and Wallace; and I had left them all at home. We borrow +the light of an observant and imaginative traveller, and see the foreign +land bright with his aura; and we think it is the country which shines. + + * * * * * + +At eight this morning we crossed the equator. I paid my footing in +whisky, and forgot all about the equator. Soon after that, idling under +the poop awning, I picked up the Doctor's book from his vacant chair. I +took the essays of Emerson carelessly and read at once--the sage plainly +had laid a trap for me--"Why covet a knowledge of new facts? Day and +night, a house and garden, a few books, a few actions, serve as well as +all trades and spectacles." So----. At this moment the first mate +crossed my light, and presently I heard the sounding machine whirring, +and then stop. There was a pause, and then the mate's unimportant voice, +"Twenty-five fathoms, sir, grey sand!" + +Emerson went sprawling. I stood up. Twenty-five fathoms! Then that grey +sand stuck to the tallow of the weight was the first of the Brazils. The +circle of waters was still complete about us, but over the bows, at a +great distance, were thunder clouds and wild lights. The oceanic swell +had decreased to a languid and glassy beat, and the water had become +jade green in colour, shot with turquoise gleams. The Skipper, himself +interested and almost jolly, announced a pound of tobacco to the first +man who spied the coast. We were nearing it at last. Those far clouds +canopied the forests of the Amazon. We stood in at slow speed. + +I know those forests. I mean I have often navigated their obscure +waterways, rafting through the wilds on a map, in my slippers, at night. +Now those forests soon were to loom on a veritable skyline. I should see +them where they stood, their roots in the unfrequented floods. I should +see Santa Maria de Belem, its aerial foliage over its shipping and +squalor. It was quite near now. I should see Santarem and Obydos, and +Itacoatiara; and then, turning from the King of Rivers to his tributary, +the Madeira, follow the Madeira to the San Antonio falls in the heart of +the South American continent. We drew over 23 feet, with this "Capella." +We were going to try what had never been attempted before by an ocean +steamer. This, too, was pioneering. I also was on an adventure, going +two thousand miles under those clouds of the equatorial rains, to live +for a while in the forests of the Orellana. And our vessel's rigging, so +they tell me, sometimes shall drag the foliage in showers on our decks, +and where we anchor at night the creatures of the jungle will call. + +Our nearness to land stirs up some old dreads in our minds also. We +discuss those dreads again, though with more concern than we did at +Swansea. Over the bows is now the prelude. We have heard many unsettling +legends of yellow fever, malaria, blackwater fever, dysentery, and +beri-beri. The mates, looking for land, swear they were fools to come a +voyage like this. They ought to have known better. The Doctor, who does +not always smile when he is amused, advises us not to buy a white sun +umbrella at Para, but a black one; then it will do for the funerals. + +"Land O!" That was the Skipper's own perfunctory cry. He had saved his +pound of tobacco. + +It was two in the afternoon. There was America. I rediscovered it with +some difficulty. All I could see was a mere local thickening of the +horizon, as though the pen which drew the faint line dividing the world +ahead into an upper and a nether opalescence had run a little freely at +one point. That thickening of the horizon was the island of Monjui. +Soon, though, there was a palpable something athwart our course. The +skyline heightened into a bluish barrier, which, as we approached still +nearer, broke into sections. The chart showed that a series of low +wooded islands skirted the mainland. Yet it was hard to believe we were +approaching land again. What showed as land was of too unsubstantial a +quality, too thin and broken a rind on that vast area of water to be of +any use as a foothold. Where luminous sky was behind an island groups of +diminutive palms showed, as tiny and distinct as the forms of mildew +under a magnifying glass, delicate black pencillings along the foot of +the sky-wall. Often that hairlike tracery seemed to rest upon the sea. +The "Capella" continued to stand in, till America was more than a frail +and tinted illusion which sometimes faded the more the eye sought it. +Presently it cast reflections. The islands grew into cobalt layers, with +vistas of silver water between them, giving them body. The course was +changed to west, and we cruised along for Atalaia point, towards the +pilot station. Over the thin and futile rind of land which topped the +sea--it might have undulated on the low swell--ponderous thunder clouds +towered, continents of night in the sky, with translucent areas dividing +them which were strangely illuminated from the hither side. Curtains as +black as bitumen draped to the waters from great heights. Two of these +appalling curtains, trailing over America, were a little withdrawn. We +could look beyond them to a diminishing array of glowing cloud summits, +as if we saw there an accidental revelation of a secret and wonderful +region with a sun of its own. And all, gigantic clouds, the sea, the far +and frail coast, were serene and still. The air had ceased to breathe. I +thought this new lucent world we had found might prove but a lucky dream +after all, to be seen but not to be entered, and that some noise would +presently shatter it and wake me. But we came alongside the white pilot +schooner, and the pilot put off in a boat manned by such a crowd of +grinning, ragged, and cinnamon skinned pirates as would have broken the +fragile wonder of any spell. Ours, though, did not break, and I was able +to believe we had arrived. At sunset the great clouds were full of +explosions of electric fire, and there were momentary revelations above +us of huge impending shapes. We went slowly over a lower world obscurely +lighted by phosphorescent waves. + + * * * * * + +It was not easy to make out, before sunrise, what it was we had come to. +I saw a phantom and indeterminate country; but as though we guessed it +was suspicious and observant, and its stillness a device, we moved +forward slowly and noiselessly, as a thief at an entrance. Low level +cliffs were near to either beam. The cliffs might have been the dense +residuum of the night. The night had been precipitated from the sky, +which was clearing and brightening. Our steamer was between banks of +these iron shades. + +Suddenly the sunrise ran a long band of glowing saffron over the shadow +to port, and the vague summit became remarkable with a parapet of black +filigree, crowns and fronds of palms and strange trees showing in rigid +patterns of ebony. A faint air then moved from off shore as though under +the impulse of the pouring light. It was heated and humid, and bore a +curious odour, at once foreign and familiar, the smell of damp earth, +but not of the earth I knew, and of vegetation, but of vegetation exotic +and wild. For a time it puzzled me that I knew the smell; and then I +remembered where we had met before. It was in the palm house at Kew +Gardens. At Kew that odour once made a deeper impression on me than the +extraordinary vegetation itself, for as a boy I thought that I inhaled +the very spirit of the tropics of which it was born. After the first +minute on the Para River that smell went, and I never noticed it again. + +Full day came quickly to show me the reality of one of my early visions, +and I suppose I may not expect many more such minutes as I spent when +watching from the "Capella's" bridge the forest of the Amazon take +shape. It was soon over. The morning light brimmed at the forest top, +and spilled into the river. The channel filled with sunshine. There it +was then. In the northern cliff I could see even the boughs and trunks; +they were veins of silver in a mass of solid chrysolite. This forest had +not the rounded and dull verdure of our own woods in midsummer, with +deep bays of shadow. It was a sheer front, uniform, shadowless, and +astonishingly vivid. I thought then the appearance of the forest was but +a local feature, and so gazed at it for what it would show me next. It +had nothing else to show me. Clumps of palms threw their fronds above +the forest roof in some places, or a giant exogen raised a dome; but +that was all. Those strong characters in the growth were seen only in +passing. They did not change the outlook ahead of converging lines of +level green heights rising directly from a brownish flood. + +Occasionally the river narrowed, or we passed close to one wall, and +then we could see the texture of the forest surface, the microstructure +of the cliff, though we could never look into it for more than a few +yards, except where, in some places, habitations were thrust into the +base of the woods, as in lower caverns. An exuberant wealth of forms +built up that forest which was so featureless from a little distance. +The numerous palms gave grace and life to the facade, for their plumes +flung in noble arcs from tall and slender columns, or sprayed directly +from the ground in emerald fountains. The rest was inextricable +confusion. Vines looped across the front of green, binding the forest +with cordage, and the roots of epiphytes dropped from upper boughs, like +hanks of twine. + +In some places the river widened into lagoons, and we seemed to be in a +maze of islands. Canoes shot across the waterways, and river schooners, +shaped very like junks, with high poops and blue and red sails, were +diminished beneath the verdure, betraying the great height of the woods. +Because of its longitudinal extension, fining down to a point in the +distance, the elevation of the forest, when uncontrasted, looked much +less than it really was. The scene was so luminous, still, and +voiceless, it was so like a radiant mirage, or a vivid remembrance of an +emotional dream got from books read and read again, that only the +unquestionable verity of our iron steamer, present with her smoke and +prosaic gear, convinced me that what was outside us was there. Across a +hatch a large butterfly hovered and flickered like a flame. Dragon flies +were suspended invisibly over our awning, jewels in shimmering enamels. + + * * * * * + +We anchored just before breakfast, and a small launch flying a large +Brazilian flag was soon fussing at our gangway. The Brazilian customs +men boarded us, and the official who was left in charge to overlook the +"Capella" while we remained was a tall and majestic Latin with dark eyes +of such nobility and brooding melancholy that it never occurred to me +that our doctor, who has travelled much, was other than a fellow with a +dull Anglo-Saxon mind when he removed some loose property to his cabin +and locked his door, before he went ashore. So I left my field glasses +on the ice-chest; and that was the last I saw of them. Yet that fellow +had such lovely hair, as the ladies would say, and his smile and his +courtesy were fit for kings. He carried a scented pink handkerchief and +wore patent leather boots. Our surgeon had but a faint laugh when these +explanations were made to him, taking my hand fondly, and saying he +loved little children. + +Para, a flat congestion of white buildings and red roofs in the sun, was +about a mile beyond our anchorage, over the port bow; and as its name +has been to me one that had the appeal of the world not ours, like +Tripoli of Barbary, Macassar, the Marquesas, and the Rio Madre de Dios, +the agent's launch, as it took us towards the small craft lying +immediately before the front of that spread of houses between the river +and the forest, was so momentous an occasion that the small talk of the +dainty Englishmen in linen suits, a gossiping group around the agent and +the Skipper, hardly came into the picture, to my mind. The launch rudely +hustled through a cluster of gaily painted native boats, the dingiest of +them bearing some sonorous name, and I landed in Brazil. + +There was an esplanade, shadowed by an avenue of mangoes. We crossed +that, and went along hot narrow streets, by blotched and shabby walls, +to the office to which our ship was consigned. We met a fisherman +carrying a large turtle by a flipper. We came to a dim cool warehouse. +There, some negroes and half-breeds were lazily hauling packages in the +shadows. It had an office railed off where a few English clerks, in +immaculate white, overlooked a staff of natives. The warehouse had a +strange and memorable odour, evasive, sweet, and pungent, as barbaric a +note as I found in Para, and I understood at once I had come to a place +where there were things I did not know. I felt almost timorous and yet +compelled when I sniffed at those shadows; though what the eye saw in +the squalid streets of the riverside, where brown folk stood regarding +us carelessly from openings in the walls, I had thought no more than a +little interesting. + +What length of time we should have in Belem was uncertain, but presently +the Skipper, looking most morose, came away from his discussion with the +agent and told us, at some length, what he thought of people who kept a +ship waiting because of a few unimportant papers. Then he mumbled, very +reluctantly, that we had plenty of time to see all Para. The Doctor and +I were out of that office before the Skipper had time to change his +mind. Our captain is a very excellent master mariner, but occasionally +he likes to test the security of his absolute autocracy, to see if it is +still sound. I never knew it when it was not; but yet he must, to assure +himself of a certainty, or to exercise some devilish choler in his +nature, sometimes beat our poor weak bodies against the adamant thing, +to see which first will break. I will say for him that he is always +polite when handing back to us our bruised fragments. Here he was giving +us a day's freedom, and one's first city of the tropics in which to +spend it; and we agreed with him that such a waste of time was almost +unbearable, and left hurriedly. + +Outside the office was a small public square where grew palms which ran +flexible boles, swaying with the weight of their crowns, clear above the +surrounding buildings, shadowing them except in one place, where the +front of a ruinous church showed, topped by a crucifix. The church, a +white and dilapidated structure, was hoary with ficus and other plants +which grew from ledges and crevices. Through the crowns of the palms the +sunlight fell in dazzling lathes and partitions, chequering the stones. +An ox-cart stood beneath. + +The Paraenses, passing by at a lazy gait--which I was soon compelled to +imitate--in the heat, were puzzling folk to one used to the features of +a race of pure blood, like ourselves. Portuguese, negro, and Indian were +there, but rarely a true type of one. Except where the black was the +predominant factor the men were impoverished bodies, sallow, meagre, and +listless; though there were some brown and brawny ruffians by the +foreshore. But the women often were very showy creatures, certainly +indolent in movement, but not listless, and built in notable curves. +They were usually of a richer colour than their mates, and moved as +though their blood were of a quicker temper. They had slow and insolent +eyes. The Indian has given them the black hair and brown skin, the negro +the figure, and Portugal their features and eyes. Of course, the ladies +of Para society, boasting their straight Portuguese descent, are not +included in this insulting description; and I do not think I saw them. +Unless, indeed, they were the ladies who boldly eyed us in the +fashionable Para hotel, where we lunched, at a great price, off imported +potatoes, tinned peas, and beef which in England would be sold to a glue +factory; I mean the women in those Parisian costumes erring something on +the sides of emphasis, and whose remarkable pallor was even a little +greenish in the throat shadows. + +After lunch some disappointment and irresolution crept into our +holiday....There had been a time--but that was when Para was only in a +book; that was when its mere printed name was to me a token of the +tropics. You know the place I mean. You can picture it. Paths that go at +noon but a little way into the jungle which overshadows an isolated +community of strange but kindly folk, paths that end in a twilight +stillness; ardent hues, flowers of vanilla, warm rain, a luscious and +generative earth, fireflies in the scented dusk of gardens; and +mystery--every outlook disappearing in the dark of the unknown. + +Well, here I was, placed by the ordinary moves of circumstance in the +very place the name of which once had been to me like a chord of that +music none hears but oneself. I stood in Para, outside a picture +postcard shop. Electric cars were bumping down a narrow street. The +glitter of a cheap jeweller's was next to the stationer's; and on the +other side was a vendor of American and Parisian boots. There have been +changes in Para since Bates wrote his idylls of the forest. We two +travellers, after ordering some red earthenware chatties, went to find +Bates' village of Nazareth. In 1850 it was a mile from the town. It is +part of the town now, and an electric tram took us there, a tram which +drove vultures off the line as it bumped along. The heat was a serious +burden. The many dogs, which found energy enough to limp out of the way +of the car only when at the point of death, were thin and diseased, and +most unfortunate to our nice eyes. The Brazilian men of better quality +we passed were dressed in black cloth suits, and one mocked the equator +with a silk hat and yellow boots. I set down these things as the tram +showed them. The evident pride and hauteur, too, of these Latins, was a +surprise to one of a stronger race. We stopped at a street corner, and +this was Nazareth. Bates' pleasant hamlet is now the place of Para's +fashionable homes--pleasant still, though the overhead tram cables, and +the electric light standards which interrupt the avenues of trees, place +you there, now your own turn comes to look for the romance of the +tropics, in another century. But the villas are in heliotrope, primrose, +azure, and rose, bowered in extravagant arbours of papaws mangoes, +bananas, and palms, with shrubberies beneath of feathery mimosas, and +cassias with orange and crimson blooms. And my last walk ashore was in +Swansea High Street in the winter rain! From Nazareth's main street the +side turnings go down to the forest. For, in spite of its quays, its +steamers, and its electric trams, Para is but built in a larger clearing +of the wilderness. The jungle stood at the bottom of all suburban +streets, a definite city wall. The spontaneity and savage freedom of the +plant life in this land of alternate hot sun and warm showers at last +blurred and made insignificant to me the men who braved it in silk hats +and broadcloth there, and the trams, and the jewellers' shops, for my +experience of vegetation was got on my knees in a London suburb, praying +things to come out of the cold mud. Here, I began to suspect, they +besieged us, quick and turbulent, an exhaustible army, ready to +reconquer the foothold man had hardly won, and to obliterate his works. + +We passed through by-ways, where naked brown babies played before the +doors. We happened upon the cathedral, and went on to the little dock +where native vessels rested on garbage, the tide being out. Vultures +pulled at stuff beneath the bilges. The crews, more Indian than +anything, and men of better body than the sallow fellows in the town, +sprawled on the hot stones of the quays and about the decks. There was a +huge negress, arms akimbo, a shapeless monument in black indiarubber +draped in cotton print, who talked loudly with a red boneless mouth to +two disregarding Indians sitting with their backs to a wall. She had a +rabbit's foot, mounted in silver, hanging between her dugs. The +schooners, ranged in an arcade, were rigged for lateen sails, very like +Mediterranean craft. The forest was a narrow neutral tinted ribbon far +beyond. The sky was blue, the texture of porcelain. The river was +yellow. And I was grievously disappointed; yet if you put it to me I +cannot say why. There was something missing, and I don't know what. +There was something I could not find; but as it is too intangible a +matter for me to describe even now, you may say, if you like, that the +fault was with me, and not with Para. We stood in a shady place, and the +doctor, looking down at his hand, suddenly struck it. "Let us go," he +said. He showed me the corpse of a mosquito. "Have you ever seen the +yellow fever chap?" the Doctor asked. "That is he." We left. + +Near the agent's office we met an English shipping clerk, and he took us +into a drink shop, and sat us at a marble-topped table having gilded +iron legs, and called for gin tonics. We began to tell him what we +thought of Para. It did not seem much of a place. It was neither here +nor there. + +He was a pallid fellow with a contemplative smile, and with weary eyes +and tired movements. "I know all that," he said. "It's a bit of a hole. +Still--You'd be surprised. There's a lot here you don't see at first. +It's big. All out there--he waved his arm west inclusively--it's a world +with no light yet. You get lost in it. But you're going up. You'll see. +The other end of the forest is as far from the people in the streets +here as London is--it's farther--and they know no more about it. I was +like you when I first came. I gave the place a week, and then reckoned I +knew it near enough. Now, I'm--well, I'm half afraid of it ... not +afraid of anything I can see ... I don't know. There's something dam +strange about it. Something you never can find out. It's something +that's been here since the beginning, and it's too big and strong for +us. It waits its time. I can feel it now. Look at those palm trees, +outside. Don't they look as if they're waiting? What are they waiting +for? You get that feeling here in the afternoon when you can't get air, +and the rain clouds are banking up round the woods, and nothing moves. +'Lord,' said a fellow to me when I first came, 'tell us about Peckham. +But for the spicy talk about yellow fever I'd think I was dead and +waiting wide awake for the judgment day.' That's just the feeling. As if +something dark was coming and you couldn't move. There the forest is, +all round us. Nobody knows what's at the back of it. Men leave Para, +going up river. We have a drink in here, and they go up river, and don't +come back. + +"Down by the square one day I saw an old boy in white ducks and a sun +helmet having a shindy with the sentry at the barracks. The old fellow +was kicking up a dust. He was English, and I suppose he thought the +sentry would understand him, if he shouted. English and Americans do. + +"You have to get into the road here, when you approach the barracks. +It's the custom. The sentry always sends you off the pavement. The old +chap was quite red in the face about it. And the things he was saying! +Lucky for him the soldier didn't know what he meant. So I went over, as +he was an Englishman, and told him what the sentry wanted. 'What,' said +the man, 'walk in the road? Not me. I'd sooner go back.' + +"Go back he did, too. I walked with him and we got rather pally. We came +in here. We sat at that table in the corner. He said he was Captain +Davis, of Barry. Ever heard of him? He said he had brought out a +shallow-draught river boat, and he was taking her up the Rio Japura. The +way he talked! Do you know the Japura? Well, it's a deuce of a way from +here. But that old captain talked--he talked like a child. He was so +obstinate about it. He was going to take that boat up the Japura, and +you'd have thought it was above Boulter's Lock. Then he began to swear +about the dagoes. + +"The old chap got quite wild again when he thought of that soldier. He +was a little man, nothing of him, and his face was screwed up as if he +was always annoyed about something. You have to take things as they +come, here, and let it go. But this Davis man was an irritable old boy, +and most of his talk was about money. He said he was through with the +boat running jobs. No more of 'em. It was as bare as boards. Nothing to +be made at the game, he said. Over his left eye he had a funny hairy +wart, a sort of knob, and whenever he got excited it turned red. I may +say he let me pay for all the drinks. I reckon he was pretty close with +his money. + +"He told me he knew a man in Barry who'd got a fine pub--a little +gold-mine. He said there was a stuffed bear at the pub and it brought +lots of customers. Seemed to think I must know the place. He said he was +going to try to get an alligator for the chap who kept the pub. The +alligator could stand on its hind legs at the other side of the door, +with an electric bulb in its mouth, like a lemon. That was his fine +idea. He reckoned that would bring customers. Then old Davis started to +fidget about. I began to think he wanted to tell me something, and I +wondered what the deuce it was. I thought it was money. It generally is. +At last he told me. He wanted one of those dried Indian heads for that +pub. 'You know what I mean,' he said. 'The Indians kill somebody, and +make his head smaller than a baby's, and the hair hangs down all round.' + +"Have you ever seen one of those heads? The Indians bone 'em, and stuff +'em with spice and gums, and let 'em dry in the sun. They don't look +nice. I've seen one or two. + +"But I tried to persuade him to let the head go. The Government has +stopped that business, you know. Got a bit too thick. If you ordered a +head, the Johnnies would just go out and have somebody's napper. + +"I missed old Davis after that. I was transferred to Manaos, up river. I +don't know what became of him. It was nearly a year when I came back to +Para. Our people had had the clearing of that boat old Davis brought +out, and I found some of his papers, still unsettled. I asked about him, +in a general way, and found he hadn't arrived. His tug had been back +twice. When it was here last it seemed the native skipper explained +Davis went ashore, when returning, at a place where they touched for +rubber. He went into the village and didn't come back. Well, it seems +the skipper waited. No Davis. So he tootled his whistle and went on up +stream, because the river was falling, and he had some more stations to +do in the season. He was at the village again in a few days, though, and +Davis wasn't there then. The tug captain said the village was deserted, +and he supposed the old chap had gone down river in another boat. But +he's not back yet. The boss said the fever had got him, somewhere. +That's the way things go here. + +"A month ago an American civil engineer touched here, and had to wait +for a boat for New York. He'd been right up country surveying for some +job or another, Peru way. I went up to his hotel with the fellows to see +him one evening. He was on his knees packing his trunks. 'Say, boys,' he +said, sitting on the floor, 'I brought a whole lot of truck from way up, +and now it hasn't got a smile for me.' He offered me his collection of +butterflies. Then the Yankee picked up a ball of newspaper off the +floor, and began to peel it. 'This goes home,' he said. 'Have you seen +anything like that? I bet you haven't.' He held out the opened packet in +his hand, and there was a brown core to it. 'I reckon that is thousands +of years old,' said the American. + +"It was a little dried head, no bigger than a cricket ball, and about +the same colour. Very like an Indian's too. The features were quite +plain, and there was a tiny wart over the left eyebrow. 'I bet you +that's thousands of years old,' said the American. 'I bet you it isn't +two,' I said." + + * * * * * + +We returned to the steamer in the late afternoon, bringing with us two +Brazilian pilots, who were to take us as far as Itacoatiara. We sailed +next morning for the interior. Para, like all the towns on the Amazon, +has but one way out of it. There is a continent behind Para, but you +cannot go that way; when you leave the city you must take the river. +Para stands by the only entrance to what is now the greatest region of +virgin tropics left in the world. Always at anchor off the city's front +are at least a dozen European steamers, most of them flying the red +ensign. A famous engineering contractor, also British, is busy +constructing modern wharves there; and Thames tugs and mudhoppers, +flying the Brazilian flag, as the law insists, but bawling London +compliments as they pass your ship, help the native schooners with their +rakish lateen sails, blue and scarlet, to make the anchorage brisk and +lively. Looking out from the "Capella's" bridge she appeared to be +within a lagoon. The lake was elliptical, and so large it was a world +for the eye to range in. It was bound by a low barrier of forest, a +barrier distant enough to lose colour, nature, and significance. Para, +white and red, lay reflecting the sunset from many facets in the +south-west, with a cheerful array of superior towers and spires. From +the ship Para looked big, modern, and prosperous; and with those vast +rounded clouds of the rains assembling and mounting over the bright +city, and brooding there, impassive and dark, but with impending keels +lustrous with the burnish of copper and steel, and seeing a rainbow +curving down from one cloud over the city's white front, I, being a +new-comer, and with a pardonable feeling of exhilaration which was of my +own well-being in a new and a wide and radiant place, thought of man +there as a conqueror who had overcome the wilderness, builded him a +city, bridled the exuberance of a savage land, and directed the sap and +life, born in a rich soil of ardent sun and rain, into the forms useful +to him. So I entered the chart-room, and looked with a new interest on +the chart of the place. Then I felt less certain of the conqueror and +his taming bridle. I saw that this lagoon in which the "Capella" showed +large and important was but a point in an immense area of tractless +islands and meandering waterways, a region intricate, and, the chart +confessed, little known. The coast opposite the city, which I had taken +for mainland, was the trivial Ihla des Oncas. The main channel of the +river was beyond that island, with the coast of Marajo for the farther +shore; and Marajo also was but an island, though as large as Wales. The +north channel of the Amazon was beyond again, with more islands, about +which the chart confessed less knowledge. One of the pilots was with me; +and when I spoke of those points in the ultimate Amazons, the alluring +names on maps you read in England, here they were, at Para, just what +they are at home, still vague and far, journeys thither to be reckoned +by time; a shrug of the shoulders and a look of amusement; two months, +Senhor, or perhaps three or four. The idea came slowly; but it dawned, +something like the conception of astronomy's amplitudes, of the +remoteness of the beyond of Amazonas, that new world I had just entered. + +I crept within the mosquito curtain that night, and the still heated +dark lay on my mind, the pressure of an unknown full of dread. I thought +of the pale shipping clerk and his tired smile, and of Captain Davis, +his face no bigger than a cricket ball, and the same colour, with a wart +over his eye; and recalled the anxious canvass I had heard made for news +of sickness up-river. A ship had passed outwards that morning, the +consul told us, with twenty men on board down with fever. + +And Thorwaldsen. I forgot to tell you about Thorwaldsen. He was a +trader, and last rainy season he took his vessel up some far backwater, +beyond Manaos, with his wife and his little daughter. News had just come +from nowhere to Para that his wife had died in childbirth in the wilds, +and Thorwaldsen had been murdered; but nothing was known of his +daughter. There it was. I did not know the Thorwaldsens. But the +trader's little girl who might then be alone in the gloom of the jungle +with savages, helped to keep me awake. And the wife, that fair-haired +Swede; she was in the alien wilderness, beyond all gentlehood, when her +time came. I could see two mosquitoes doing their best to work backwards +through the curtain mesh. They were after me, the emissaries of the +unknown, and their pertinacity was astonishing. + + * * * * * + +"_Jan. 9._ The 'Capella' left Para at three o'clock this morning, and +continued up the Para River. Daylight found us in a wide brownish +stream, with the shores low and indistinguishable on either beam. When +the sun grew hot, the jungle came close in; it was often so close that +we could see the nests of wasps on the trees, like grey shields hanging +there. Between the Para River and the Amazon the waters dissipate into a +maze of serpenting ditches. In width these channels usually are no more +than canals, but they were deep enough to float our big tramp steamer. +They thread a multitude of islands, islands overloaded with a massed +growth which topped our mast-heads. Our steamer was enclosed within +resonant chasms, and the noise and incongruity of our progress awoke +deep protests there. + +"The dilated loom of the rains, the cloud shapes so continental that +they occupied, where they stood not so far away, all the space between +the earth and sky, bulged over the forest at the end of every view. The +heat was luscious; but then I had nothing to do but to look on from a +hammock under the awning. The foliage which was pressed out over the +water, not many yards from the hurrying 'Capella,' had a closeness of +texture astonishing, and even awful, to one who knew only the thin woods +of the north. It ascended directly from the water's edge, sometimes out +of the water, and we did not often see its foundation. There were no +shady aisles and glades. The sight was stopped on a front of polished +emerald, a congestion of stiff leaves. The air was still. Individual +sprays and fronds, projecting from the mass in parabolas with flamboyant +abandon and poise, were as rigid as metallic and enamelled shapes. The +diversity of forms, and especially the number and variety of the palms, +so overloaded an unseen standing that the parapets of the woods +occasionally leaned outwards to form an arcade above our masts. One +should not call this the jungle; it was even a soft and benignant Eden. +This was the forest I really wished to find. Often the heavy parapets of +the woods were upheld on long colonnades of grey palm boles; or the +whole upper structure appeared based on low green arches, the pennate +fronds of smaller palms flung direct from the earth. + +"There was not a sound but the noise of our intruding steamer. +Occasionally we brushed a projecting spray, or a vine pendent from a +cornice. We proved the forest then. In some shallow places were +regiments of aquatic grasses, bearing long plumes. There were trees +which stood in the water on a tangle of straight pallid roots, as though +on stilts. This up-burst of intense life so seldom showed the land to +which it was fast, and the side rivers and paranas were so many, that I +could believe the forest afloat, an archipelago of opaque green vapours. +Our heavy wash swayed and undulated the aquatic plants and grasses, as +though disturbing the fringe of those green clouds which clung to the +water because of their weight in a still air. + +"There was seldom a sign of life but the infrequent snowy herons, and +those curious brown fowl, the ciganas. The sun was flaming on the +majestic assembly of the storm. The warm air, broken by our steamer, +coiled over us in a lazy flux. I did not hear the bell calling to meals. +We all hung over the 'Capella's' side, gaping, like a lot of boys. + +"Sometimes we passed single habitations on the water side. Ephemeral +huts of palm-leaves were forced down by the forest, which overhung them, +to wade on frail stilts. A canoe would be tied to a toy jetty, and on +the jetty a sad woman and several naked children would stand, with no +show of emotion, to watch us go by. Behind them was the impenetrable +foliage. I thought of the precarious tenure on earth of these brown folk +with some sadness, especially as the day was going. The easy dominance +of the wilderness, and man's intelligent morsel of life resisting it, +was made plain when we came suddenly upon one of his little shacks +secreted among the aqueous roots of a great tree, cowering, as it were, +between two of the giant's toes. Those brown babies on the jetties never +cheered us. They watched us, serious and forlorn. Alongside their +primitive hut were a few rubber trees, which we knew by their scars. +Late in the afternoon we came to a large cavern in the base of the +forest, a shadowy place where at last we did see a gathering of the +folk. A number of little wooden crosses peeped above the floor in the +hollow. The sundering floods and the forest do not always keep these +folk from congregation, and the comfort of the last communion. + +"There was a question at night as to whether our pilots would anchor or +not. They decided to go on. We did not go the route of Bates, _via_ +Breves, but took the Parana de Buyassa on our way to the Amazon. It was +night when we got to the Parana, and but for the trailing lights, the +fairy mooring lines of habitations in the woods, and what the silent +explosions of lightning revealed of great heads of trees, startlingly +close and monstrous, as though watching us in silent and intent regard, +we saw nothing of it." + + * * * * * + +Once I knew a small boy, and on a summer day too much in the past now to +be recalled without some private emotion, he said to his father, on the +beach of a popular East Anglian resort, "And where is the sea?" He stood +then, for the first time, where the sea, by all the promises of pictures +and poems, should have been breaking on its cold grey crags. "The sea?" +said the father, in astonishment, "why, there it is. Didn't you know?" + +And that father, being an exact man, there beyond appeal the sea was. +And what was it? A discoloured wash, of mean limit, which flopped +wearily on some shabby sands littered with people and luncheon papers. +Such a flat, stupid, and leaden disillusion surely never before fell on +the upturned, bright and expectant soul of a young human, who, I can +vouch, began life, like most others, believing the noblest of +everything. It was an ocean which was inferior even to the +bathing-machines, and could be seen but in division when that child, +walking along the rank of those boxes on wheels, peeped between them. + +You will have noticed with what simple indifference the people who +really know what they call the truth will shatter an illusion we have +long cherished; though, as we alone see our private dreams, those honest +folk cannot be blamed for poking their feet through fine pictures they +did not know were there. + +I had a picture of the Amazon, which I had long cherished. I was leaning +to-day over the bulwarks of the "Capella," watching the jungle pass. The +Doctor was with me. I thought we were still on the Para River, and was +waiting for our vessel to emerge from that stream, as through a narrow +gate, dramatically, into the broad sunlight of the greatest river in the +world, the king of rivers, the Amazon of my picture. We idly scanned the +forest with binoculars, having nothing to do, and saw some herons, and +the ciganas, and once a sloth which was hanging to a tree. Para, I felt, +was as distant as London. The silence, the immobility of it all, and the +pour of the tropic sun, were just beginning to be a little subduing. We +had come already to the wilderness. There was, I thought, a very great +deal of this forest; and it never varied. + +"We shall be on the Amazon soon," I said hopefully, to the doctor. + +"We have been on it for hours," he replied. And that is how I got there. + +But the Amazon is not seen, any more than is the sea, at the first +glance. What the eye first gathers, is, naturally (for it is but an +eye), nothing like commensurate with your own image of the river. The +mind, by suggestive symbols, builds something portentous, a vague and +tremendous idea. What I saw was only a very swift and opaque yellow +flood, not much broader, it seemed to me, than the Thames at Gravesend, +and the monotonous green of the forest. It was all I saw for a +considerable time. + +I see something different now. It is not easily explained merely as a +yellow river, with a verdant elevation on either hand, and over it a +blue sky. It would be difficult to find, except by luck, a word which +would convey the immensity of the land of the Amazons, something of the +aloofness and separation of the points of its extremes, with months and +months of adventure between them. What a journey it would be from Ino in +Bolivia, on the Rio Madre de Dios, to Conception in Colombia, on the Rio +Putumayo; there is another "Odyssey" in a voyage like that. And think of +the names of those places and rivers! When I take the map of South +America now, and hold it with the estuary of the Amazon as its base, my +thoughts are like those might be of a lost ant, crawling in and over the +furrows and ridges of an exposed root as he regards all he may of the +trunk rising into the whole upper cosmos of a spreading oak. The Amazon +then looks to me, properly symbolical, as a monstrous tree, and its +tributaries, paranas, furos, and igarapes, as the great boughs, little +boughs, and twigs of its ascending and spreading ramifications, so +minutely dissecting the continent with its numberless watercourses that +the mind sees that dark region as an impenetrable density of green and +secret leaves; which, literally, when you go there, is what you will +find. You enter the leaves, and vanish. You creep about the region of +but one of its branches, under a roof of foliage which stays the midday +shine and lets it through to you in the dusk of the interior but as +points of distant starlight. Occasionally, as we did upon a day, you see +something like Santarem. There is a break and a change in the journey. +Moving blindly through the maze of green, there, hanging in the clear +day at the end of a bough, is a golden fruit. + + * * * * * + +"_Jan. 10._ The torrid morning, tempered by a cooling breeze which +followed us up river, was soon overcast. Disappointingly narrow at +first, the Amazon broadened later, but not to one's conception of its +magnitude. But the greatness of this stream, I have already learned, +dawns upon you in time, and if you sufficiently endure. It persists +about you, this forest and this river, like the stark desolation of the +sea. The real width of the river is not often seen because of the +islands which fringe its banks, many of them of considerable size. The +side channels, or paranas-miris, between the islands and the shores, are +used in preference to the main stream by the native sailing craft, to +avoid the strength of the current. We had the river to ourselves. The +'Capella' was taken by the pilots, first over to one side and then to +the other, dodging the set of the stream. The forest has changed. It has +now a graceless and savage aspect when we are close to it. There are not +so many palms. At a little distance the growth appears a mass of spindly +oaks and beeches, though with a more vivid and lighter green foliage. +But when near it shows itself alien enough, a front of nameless and +congested leaves. I suppose it would be more than a hundred feet in +altitude. Sometimes the forest stands in the water. At other times a +yellow bank shows, a narrow strip under the trees, rarely more than four +feet high, and strewn with the bleaching skeletons of trees and +entanglements of vine. There is rarely a sign of life. Once this morning +a bird called in the woods when we were close. Butterflies are +continually crossing the ship, and dragonflies and great wasps and +hornets are hawking over us. The sight of one swallowtail butterfly, a +big black and yellow fellow, sent the cook insane. The insect stayed its +noble flight, poised over our hatch, and then came down to see what we +were. It settled on a coil of rope, leisurely pulsing its wings. The +cook, at the sight of this bold and bright being, sprang from the +galley, and leaped down to the deck with a dish cloth. To our surprise +he caught the insect, and explained with eagerness how that the +shattered pattern of colours, which more than covered his gross palm, +would improve his firescreen in a Rotterdam parlour. + +"Early in the forenoon sections of the forest vanished in grey rain +squalls, though elsewhere the sun was brilliant. The plane of the dingy +yellow flood was variegated with transient areas of bright sulphur and +chocolate. We were hugging the right bank, and so saw the mouth of the +Xingu as we passed. At midday some hills ahead, the Serra de Almerim, +gave us relief from the dead level of the wearying green walls. The +sight of those blue heights with their flat tops--they were perhaps no +more than 1000 feet above the forest--curiously stimulated the eye and +lifted one's humour, long depressed by the everlasting sameness of the +prospect and the heat. Later in the day we passed more of the welcome +hills, the Serra de Maranuaqua, Velha Pobre, and Serras de Tapaiunaquara +and Paranaquara, their cones, truncated pyramids, knolls and hog backs, +ranging contrary to our course. Bates says some of them are bare, or +covered only with a short herbage; but all those I examined with a good +telescope had forest to the summits; though a few of the inferior +heights, which stood behind the island of Jurupari (the island where +dreams come at night) were grassy. Those cobalt prominences rose like +precipitous islands from a green sea. We were the only spectators. One +high range, as we passed, was veiled in a glittering mesh of rain. The +river, after we left Jurupari, bent round, and brought the heights +astern of us. The sun set. + +"The river and the forest are best at sundown. The serene level rays +discovered the woods. We saw trees then distinctly, almost as a +surprise. Till then the forest had been but a gloom by day. Behind us +was the jungle front. It changed from green to gold, a band of light +between the river and the darkling sky. Some greater trees emerged +majestically. It was the first time that day we had really seen the +features of the jungle. It was but a momentary revelation. The clouds +were reflectors, throwing amber lights below. In the hills astern of us +ravines hitherto unsuspected caught the transitory glory. The dark +heights had many polished facets. One range, round-shouldered and +wooded, I thought resembled the promontories about Clovelly, and for a +few minutes the Amazon had the bright eyes of a friend. On a ridge of +those heights I could see the sky through some of its trees. The light +quickly gave out, and it was night. + +"We continued cruising along the south shore. The usual pulsations of +lightning made night intermittent; the forest was not more than 150 feet +from our vessel, and sitting under the awning the trees kept jumping out +of the night, startlingly near. The night was still and hot, and my +cabin lamp had attracted myriads of insects through the door which had +been left open for air. A heap of crawlers lay dead on the desk, and the +bunk curtain was smothered with grotesque winged shapes, flies, cicadas, +mantis, phasmas, moths, beetles, and mosquitoes." + + * * * * * + +Next morning found us running along the north shore. Parrots were +squawking in the woods alongside. A large alligator floated close by the +ship, its jaws open in menace. At breakfast time a strip of white beach +came into view on the opposite coast, a place in that world of three +colours on which one's tired eyes could alight and rest. That was +Santarem. Sharp hills rose immediately behind the town. The town is in a +saddle of the hills, slipping down to the river in terraces of white, +chrome, and blue houses. The Rio Tapajos, a black water tributary and a +noble river, enters the main stream by Santarem, its dark flood sharply +contrasted with the tawny Amazon. But the Amazon sweeps right across its +mouth in a masterful way. There is a definite line dividing black from +yellow water, and then no more Tapajos. + +We passed numerous floating islands (Ilhas de Caapim) and trees adrift, +evidence, the pilots said, that the river was rising. These grass +islands are a feature of the Amazon. They look like lush pastures +adrift. Some of them are so large it is difficult to believe they are +really afloat till they come alongside. Then, if the river is at all +broken by a breeze, the meadow plainly undulates. This floating cane and +grass grows in the sheltered bays and quiet paranas-miris, for though +the latter are navigable side-channels of the river in the rainy season, +in the dry they are merely isolated swamps. But when the river is in +flood the earth is washed away from the roots of this marsh growth, and +it moves off, a flourishing, mobile field, often twenty feet in +thickness. Such islands, when large, can be dangerous to small craft. +Small flowers blossom on these aquatic fields, which shelter snakes and +turtles, and sometimes the peixe-boi, the manatee. + +Obydos was in sight in the afternoon, but presently we lost it in a +violent squall of rain. The squall came down like a gun burst, and +nearly carried away the awnings. It was evening before we were abreast +of that most picturesque town I saw on the river. Obydos rests on one of +the rare Amazon cliffs of rufus clay and sandstone. The forest mounts +the hill above it, and the scattered red roofs of the town show in a +surf of foliage. The cliffs glowed in cream and cherry tints, with a +cascade of vines falling over them, though not reaching the shore. The +dainty little houses sit high in a loop of the cliffs. We left the city +behind, with a huge cumulus cloud resting over it, and the evening light +on all. + +But Obydos and sunsets and rain squalls, and the fireflies which flit +about the dark ship at night in myriads, tiny blue and yellow glow-lamps +which burn with puzzling inconstancy, as though being switched on and +off, though they help me with this narrative, yet candour compels me to +tell you that they take up more space in this book than they do in the +land of the Amazon. They were incidental and small to us, dominated by +the shadowing presence of the forest. + +We have been on the river nearly a week. But our steamer's decks, even +by day, are deserted now. We lean overside no longer looking at this +strange country. The heat is the most noteworthy fact, and drives every +one to what little leeward to the glare there is. Our cook, who is a +salamander of a fellow, and has no need to fear the possibilities of his +future life--though I do not remember he ever told me he was really +thoughtful for them--feeling a little uncomfortable one day when at work +on our dinner, glanced at his thermometer, and fled in terror. It +registered 134 deg.. He begged me to go in and verify it, and once inside I +was hardly any time doing that. We have such days, without a breath of +air, and two vivid walls of still jungle, and between them a yellow +river serpentining under the torrid sun, and a silence which is like +deafness. + +Under the shadow of the awning aft, in his deck chair, the Doctor is +preparing our defences by sounding a profound volume on tropical +diseases. This gives us but little confidence; though, as to our +surgeon, recently I overheard one fireman to another, "I tell yer +the--doc's a Man. That's what he is." (This is the result of the gin +with the quinine.) Yet, good man as he is, his book on the consequences +of the tropics is so large that we fear we all cannot escape so many +impediments to joy. But our health's guardian is careful we do not +anticipate anything from peeps into the mysteries. He never leaves his +big book about, much as some of us would like to see the pictures in it, +after what the donkeyman told us. + +This is how it was. Donkey, in spite of instructions, and I know how +emphatic the Skipper usually is, slept on deck away from his mosquito +bar a few nights ago. He said at the time that he wasn't afraid of them +little fanciful biters, or something of the kind. I have no doubt the +Doctor would have had some trouble in making clear to Donkey's +understanding exactly what are the links, delicate but sure, between +mosquitoes and dissolution and decay in man. So he showed Donkey a +picture. I wish I knew what it was--but the surgeon preserves the usual +professional reticence in the affairs of his patients. For now Donkey is +convinced it is very bad to sleep outside his curtain, and when he tries +to tell us how unwholesome such sleeping can be, just at the point when +he gets most entertaining his vocabulary wears into holes and tatters. +You could not conjure that man from his curtain now, no, not if you +showed him, in a vision, Cardiff, and the fairy lights of all its dock +hotels. I know that in the Doctor's book there is a picture of a negro +who acquired, in a superb way, a wonderful form of elephantiasis, for +the Doctor showed it to me once, as a treat, when he thought I was +growing slack and bored. + +We require now such childish laughter at each other's discomfiture to +break the spell of this land into which we are sinking deeper. Still the +forest glides by. It is a shadow on the mind. It stands over us, an +insistent riddle, every morning when I look out from my bunk. I watch it +all day, drawn against my will; and as day is dying it is still there, +paramount, enigmatic, silent, its question implied in its mere +persistence--meeting me again on the next day, still with its mute +interrogation. + +We have been passing it for nearly a week. It should have convinced me +by now that it is something material. But why should I suppose it is +that? We have had no chance to examine it. It does not look real. It +does not remind me of anything I know of vegetation. When you sight your +first mountains, a delicate and phantom gleam athwart the stars, are you +reminded of the substance of the hills? I have been watching it for so +long, this abiding and soundless forest, that now I think it is like the +sky, intangible, an apparition; what the eye sees of the infinite, just +as the eye sees a blue colour overhead at midday, and the glow of the +Milky Way at night. For the mind sees this forest better than the eye. +The mind is not deceived by what merely shows. Wherever the steamer +drives the forest recedes, as does the sky at sea; but it never leaves +us. + +The jungle gains nothing, and loses nothing, at noon. It is only a +sombre thought still, as at midnight. It is still, at noon, so obscure +and dumb a presence that I suspect the sun does not illuminate it so +much as reveal our steamer in its midst. We are revealed instead. The +presence sees us advancing into its solitudes, a small, busy, and +impudent intruder. But the forest does not greet, and does not resent +us. It regards us with the vacancy of large composure, with a lofty +watchfulness which has no need to show its mind. I think it knows our +fears of its domain. It knows the secret of our fate. It makes no sign. +The pallid boles of the trees, the sentinels by the water with the press +of verdure behind them, stand, as we pass, like soundless exclamations. +So when we go close in shore I find myself listening for a chance +whisper, a careless betrayal of the secret. There is not a murmur in the +host; though once a white bird flew yauping from a tree, and then it +seemed the desolation had been surprised into a cry, a prolonged and +melancholy admonition. Following that the silence was deepened, as +though an indiscretion were regretted. A sustained and angry protest at +our presence would have been natural; but not that infinite line of +lofty trees, darkly superior, silently watching us pass. + + * * * * * + +One night we anchored off the south shore in twenty fathoms, but close +under the trees. At daybreak we stood over to the opposite bank. The +river here was of great width, the north coast being low and indistinct. +These tacks across stream look so purposeless, in a place where there +are no men and all the water looks the same. You go over for nothing. +But this morning, high above the land ahead, some specks were seen +drifting like fragments of burnt paper, the sport of an idle and distant +wind. Those drifting dots were urubus, the vultures, generally the first +sign that a settlement is near. To come upon a settlement upon the +Amazons is like landfall at sea. It brings all on deck. And there, at +last, was Itacoatiara or Serpa. From one of the infrequent, low, +ferruginous cliffs of this river the jungle had been cleared, and on +that short range of modest, undulating heights which displaced the green +palisades with soft glowings of rose, cherry, and orange rock, the sight +escaped to a disorder of arboured houses, like a disarray of little +white cubes; Serpa was, in appearance, half a basketful of white bricks +shot into a portico of the forest. + +That morning was no inducement to exertion, but when an Indian paddled +his canoe alongside our anchored steamer the Doctor and the Purser got +into it, and away. The hot earth would be a change from hot iron. +Besides, I was eager for my first walk in equatorial woods. Our steamer +was anchored below the town, off a small campo, or clearing. The native +swashed his canoe into a margin of floating plants, which had rounded +leaves and inflated stalks, like buoys. I looked at them, and indeed at +the least thing, as keenly as though we were now going to land in the +moon. Nothing should escape me; the colour of the mud, the water tepid +to my hand, the bronze canoeman in his pair of old cotton pants split +just where they should have been scrupulous, and the weeds and grass. I +would drain my tropics to the last precious drop. I myself was seeing +what I had thought others lucky to have seen. It was like being born +into the world as an understanding adult. We got to a steep bank of red +clay, fissured by the heat, and as hard as brickwork. Green and brown +lizards whisked before us as we broke the quiet. From the top of the +bank the anchored steamer looked a little stranger. Aboard her, and she +is a busy village. Now she appeared but a mark I did not recognise in +that reticent solitude. The Amazon was an immensity of water, a plain of +burnished silver, where headlands, islands, and lines of cliff were all +cut in one level mass of emerald veined with white. The canoe going +downstream appeared to dissolve in candent vapour. Cloudland low down +over the forest to the south, a far disorder of violet heights, waiting +to fill the sky at sunset and to shock our unimportance then with +convulsions of blue flames, did not seem more aloof and inaccessible to +me than our immediate surroundings. + +The clearing was a small bay in the jungle. A few statuesque silk-cotton +trees, buttressed giants, were isolated in its centre. A bunch of +dun-coloured cattle with twisted horns stood beneath them, though the +trees gave them no shade, for each grey trunk was as bare of branches +for sixty feet of its length as a stone column. The wall of the jungle +was quite near, and as I stood watching it intently, I could hear but +the throb of my own life. The faint sibilation of insects was only as +if, in the silence, you heard the sharp rays of the sun impinge on the +earth; your finer ear caught that sound when you forgot the ring and +beat of your body. It was something below mere silence. + +We approached the wall to the west, as a path went through the harsh +swamp herbage that way, and entered the jungle. The sun went out almost +at once. It was cellar cool under the trees. We had no idea where the +path would lead us. That did not matter. No doubt it would be the place +desired. The Doctor walked ahead, and I could just see his helmet, the +way was so narrow and uncertain. I kept missing the helmet, for +everything in the half-lighted solitude was strange. One could not keep +an eye on a white hat on one's first equatorial ramble, and only when +the quiet was heavy enough to be a burden did I look up from a puzzling +leaf, or some busy ants, to find myself alone. There was a feeling that +you were being watched; but there were no eyes, when you glanced round +quickly. Do you remember that dream which sometimes came when we were +children? There were, I remember, empty corridors prolonging into the +shadows of a nameless house where not a sign showed of what was there. +We went on, and no words we could think of when we woke could tell what +we felt when we looked into those long silent aisles of the house +without a name; for we knew something was there; but there was no +telling what the thing would be like when it showed. That is your +sensation in a first walk in a Brazilian forest. + +I stopped at lianas, and curious foliage, trying to trace them to a +beginning, but rarely with any success. There were some mantis, which +commenced to run on a tree while I was examining its bark. They were +like flakes of the bark. For a moment the tree seemed to quiver its hide +at my irritating touch. Then the Doctor called, and I pushed along to +find him stooping over a land snail, the size of a man's fist, which +rather puzzled him, for it had what he called an operculum; that is, a +cap such as a winkle's, only in this case it was as large as a crown +piece. I do not know if it was the operculum, for my knowledge of such +things is small; but I did feel this was the only twelfth birthday which +had come to me for many years. + +Presently we saw light, as you would from the interior of a tunnel. Some +beams of sunshine slanted from a break in the roof to where a tree had +fallen, making a bridge for us across an igaripe, a stream, that is, +large enough to be a way for a canoe. The sundered, buttressed roots of +the tree formed a steep climb to begin with, but the buttresses going +straight along the trunk as handrails made crossing the bridge an easy +matter. Raising my hand to a root which was hot in the sun, and watching +a helicon butterfly, a black and yellow fellow, which settled near us, +slowly open and shut his wings, I jumped, because it felt as though a +lighted match had dropped into my sleeve. But I couldn't douse it. It +burned in ten places at once. It was a first lesson in constant +watchfulness in this new world. I had placed my hand in a swarm of +inconspicuous fire ants. The dead tree was alive with them, and our +passage quickened. We rubbed ourselves hysterically, for the Doctor had +got some too; and there was no professional reserve about him that time. + +After crossing the igaripe the character of the forest changed. It was +now a growth of wild cacao trees. Nothing grew beneath them. The floor +was a black paste, littered with dead sticks. The woods were more open, +but darker and more dank than before. The sooty limbs of the cacao trees +grew low, and filled the view ahead with a perplexity of leafless and +tortured boughs. They were hung about with fruit, pendent lamps lit with +a pale greenish light. We saw nothing move there but two delicate +butterflies, which had transparent wings with opaque crimson spots, such +as might have been served Titania herself; yet the gloom and black ooze, +and the eerie globes, with their illusion of light hung upon distorted +shapes, was more the home of the fabulous sucuruja, the serpent which is +forty feet long. + +A dry stick snapping underfoot had the same effect as that crash which +resounds for some embarrassing seconds when your umbrella drops in a +gallery of the British Museum. The impulse was to apologise to +something. We had been so long in the twilight, recoiling at nameless +objects in the path, a monstrous legume perhaps a yard long and coiled +like a reptile, seeing things only with a second look, that the sudden +entrance into a malocal, a forest clearing, which, as though it were a +reservoir, the sun had filled with bright light, was like a plunge into +a warm, fluid, and lustrous element. + +In the clearing were the huts of an Indian village. Only the roofs could +be seen, through some plantations of bananas. Around the clearing, a +side of which was cut off by a stream, was the overshadowing green +presence. Some chocolate babies, as serious as gnomes, looked up as we +came into daylight, opened their eyes wide, and fled up the path between +the plantains. + +If I could sing, I would sing the banana. It has the loveliest leaf I +know. I feel intemperate about it, because I came upon it after our +passage through a wood which could have been underground, a tangle of +bare roots joining floor and ceiling in limitless caverns. We stood +looking at the plantation till our mind was fed with grace and light. +The plantain jets upwards with a copious stem, and the fountain returns +in broad rippled pennants, falling outwardly, refined to points, when +the impulse is lost. A world could not be old on which such a plant +grows. It is sure evidence of earth's vitality. To look at it you would +not think that growing is a long process, a matter of months and natural +difficulties. The plantain is an instant and joyous answer to the sun. +The midribs of the leaves, powerful but resilient, held aloft in +generous arches the broad planes of translucent green substance. It is +not a fragile and dainty thing, except in colour and form. It is lush +and solid, though its ascent is so aerial, and its form is content to +the eye. There is no green like that of its leaves, except at sea. The +stout midribs are sometimes rosy, but the banners they hold well above +your upturned face are as the crest of a wave in the moment of collapse, +the day showing through its fluid glass. And after the place of dead +matter and mummied husks in gloom, where we had been wandering, this +burst of leaves in full light was a return to life. + +We continued along the path, in the way of the vanished children. Among +the bananas were some rubber trees, their pale trunks scored with brown +wounds, and under some of the incisions small tin cups adhered, fastened +there with clay. In most of the cups the collected latex was congealed, +for the cups were half full of rain-water, which was alive with mosquito +larvae. The path led to the top of the river bank. The stream was narrow, +but full and deep. A number of women and children were bathing below, +and they looked up stolidly as we appeared. Some were negligent on the +grass, sunning themselves. Others were combing their long, straight hair +over their honey- and snuff-coloured bodies. The figures of the women +were full, lissom, and rounded, and they posed as if they were aware +that this place was theirs. They were as unconscious of their grace as +animals. They looked round and up at us, and one stayed her hand, her +comb half through the length of her hair, and all gazed intently at us +with faces having no expression but a little surprise; then they turned +again to proceed with their toilets and their gossip. They looked as +proper with their brown and satiny limbs and bodies, in the secluded and +sunny arbour where the water ran, framed in exuberant tropical foliage, +as a herd of deer. + +I had never seen primitive man in his native place till then. There he +was, as at the beginning, and I saw with a new respect from what a +splendid creature we are derived. It was, I am glad to say, to cheer the +existence of these people that I had put money in a church plate at +Poplar. Poplar, you may have heard, is a parish in civilisation where an +organised community is able, through its heritage of the best of two +thousand years of religion, science, commerce, and politics, to eke out +to a finish the lives of its members (warped as they so often are by +arid dispensations of Providence) with the humane Poor Law. The Poor Law +is the civilised man's ironic rebuke to a parsimonious Creator. It is a +jest which will ruin the solemnity of the Judgment Day. Only the man of +long culture could think of such a shattering insult to the All Wise who +made this earth too small for the children He continues to send to it, +trailing their clouds of glory which prove a sad hindrance and get so +fouled in the fight for standing room on their arrival. But these +savages of the Brazilian forest know nothing of the immortal joke +conceived by their cleverer brothers. They have all they want. +Experience has not taught them to devise such a cosmic mock as a Poor +Law. How do these poor savages live then, who have not been vouchsafed +such light? They pluck bananas, I suppose, and eat them, swinging in +hammocks. They live a purely animal existence. More than that, I even +hear that should you find a child hungry in an Indian village, you may +be sure all the strong men there are hungry too. I was not able to prove +that; yet it may be true there are people to-day to whom the law that +the fittest must survive has not yet been helpfully revealed. (This is +really the Doctor's fault. I should never have thought of Poplar if he +had not wondered aloud how those bathers under the palms managed without +a workhouse.) + +Behind us were the shelters of these settled Indians, the "cabaclos," as +they are called in Brazil (literally, copper coloured). Each house was +but a square roof of the fronds of a species of attalea palm, upheld at +each corner by poles seven feet high. The houses had no sides, but were +quite open, except that some had a quarter of the interior partitioned +off with a screen of leaves. There was a rough attempt at a garden about +each dwelling, with rose bushes and coleas in the midst of gourds and +patches of maize. The roses were scented, and of the single briar kind. +We entered one of the dwellings, and surprised a young woman within who +was swinging in a hammock smoking a native pipe of red clay through a +grass stem. One fine limb, free of her cotton gown to the thigh, hung +indolently over the hammock, the toes touching the earth and giving the +couch movement. Her black hair, all at first we could see of her head, +nearly reached the ground. + +A well-grown girl, innocent from head to feet, saw us enter, and cried +to her mother, who rose in the hammock, threw her gown over her leg, +smiled gravely at us, and alighted, to vanish behind the screen with the +child, reappearing presently with the girl neatly attired. Other +children came, and soon had confidence to examine us closely and +critically, grave little mortals with eyes which spoke the only language +I understood there. The men and women who gathered stood behind the +children, smiling sadly and kindly. They were gentle, undemonstrative, +and observant, with features of the conventional Indian type. The men +were spare and lithe, of medium height, wearing only shorts tied with +string below their bronze busts. The women were of fuller build, with +heavier but more cheerful features, and each was dressed in a single +cotton garment, open above, revealing the breasts. + +The noon shadows of the hut, and the trees, were deep as the stains of +ink. A tray of mandioca root, farinha, was set in the hot sun to dry. +Under a gourd tree was a heap of turtle shells. A little game, a +capybara, and a bird like a crow with a brown rump, were hung on the +screen. But the most remarkable feature of the house in the forest was +its pets. A pair of parraquets ran in and out the bushes like green +mice. My helmet was tipped over my eyes, and, looking upwards, there was +an audience of monkeys in the shadow, quite beside themselves with +curiosity. My sudden movement sent them off like fireworks. One was a +most engaging little fellow, a jet-black tamarin slightly larger than a +squirrel. Presently he found courage to come closer, with a companion, a +brown monkey of his own size. As they sat side by side the Doctor +pointed out that the expressions in the faces of these monkeys showed +temperaments separating them even more widely than they were separated +by those physical differences which made them species. I saw at once, +with some pleasure and a little vanity, that I might be more nearly +related to the friendly cabaclos than I am to some people in England. +The brown chap would be no doubt a master of industry on the tree tops, +keeping a whole tree to himself, and living on nuts which others +gathered. You could see it in his keen and domineering look, and in the +quick, casual way he crowded his fellow, who always made room for him. I +have seen such a face, and such manners, in great industrial centres. +They are the marks of the ablest and best, who get on. His hard, eager +eyes showed censoriousness, cruelty, and acquisitiveness. But his +companion, with a sooty and hairless face, and black hair parted in the +middle of a frail forehead, was a pal of ours, and knew it. The brown +midget showed angry distrust of us, knowing what devilry was in his own +mind. But the black, though more delicate and nervous a monkey, his mind +being innocent of secret plots, had gentleness and faith in his looks, +and showed a laughable and welcome curiosity in us. He made friendly +twitterings--not the harsh and menacing chatter of the other--and +perfectly self-possessed, his pure soul giving him quiethood, examined +us in a brotherly way with an ebon paw which was as small and fragile as +a black fairy's. + +A jabiru stork stood on one leg, beak on breast, meditating, caring +nothing for all that was outside its ruminating mind. There were parrots +on the cross-ties of the roof, on the floor, on the shoulders of the +women, and in the hands of the children, and they were getting an +interesting time through the monkeys when their faces were not cocked +sideways at us in a knowing fashion. And what looked like a crow was +giving bitter and ruthless chase to a young agouti, in and out of the +bare feet of the company. I have never seen creatures so tame. But +Indian women, as I learned afterwards, have a fine gift for winning the +confidence of wild things, and that afternoon they took hold of the +creatures, anyhow and anywhere, to bring them for our inspection, +without the captives showing the least alarm or anger. There were the +dogs, too. But they were like all the dogs we saw in Brazil, looking +sorry for themselves; and they sat about in case they should fall if +they attempted to stand. Our audience broke up suddenly, in an uproar of +protests, to chase the brown monkey, who was towing a frantic parrot by +the tail. + +We continued our walk, entering the forest again on another path. Here +the growth was secondary, and the underbush dense on both sides of the +trail. The voices of the village stopped as we entered the shades, and +there was no more sound except when a bird scurried away heavily, and +again, when some cicadas, the "scissors grinders," suddenly sprang an +astonishing whirring from a tree. The sound was as loud as that of a +locomotive letting steam escape in a covered station. At a clearing so +small that the roof of the jungle had been but little broken, where a +hut stood as though at a well-bottom sunk in a depth of trees, we turned +back. That deep well in the trees contained but little light, for +already it was being choked with vines. The hut was of the usual light +construction, though its sides were of leaves, as well as its roof. I +think it was the most melancholy dwelling I have ever happened on in my +wanderings. It did not look as though it had been long deserted. There +were ashes and a broken flesh-pot outside it. The entrance was veiled +with gross spiders' webs. On the earth floor within were puddles of +rain. Round it the forest stood, like night in abeyance. The tree tops +overhung, silently intent on what man had been doing at their feet. A +child's chemise was stretched on a thorn, and close by was a small +grave, separated by little sticks from the secular earth. A dead plant +was in the centre of the grave, and a crude wooden crucifix. + + * * * * * + +We had plenty of opportunities for exploring Serpa, for the Amazon that +rainy season was slow in rising, and consequently it would have been +unsafe for us to venture into the Madeira. The tributary would have been +full, but it was necessary for the waters of the main stream to dam and +heighten the flood of its tributary before we could trust our draught +there. We were nine days at Serpa. The Amazon would rise as much as a +foot one day, and our distance from the shore would increase +perceptibly, with strong whirling eddies which made the trip ashore more +difficult. Then it would fall again. Some of the yellow Amazon porpoises +showed alongside occasionally, and alligators floated about, though +nothing was seen of them but their snouts. + +Serpa is a small but growing place. It was but a missionary settlement +of Abacaxis Indians from the Madeira in 1759, and was called +Itacoatiara. When I was there it was renewing its old importance, +because the Madeira-Mamore railway undertaking had placed a depot a +little to the west of the village. The Doctor and I spent many memorable +days in its neighbourhood, butterfly-hunting and sauntering. Though +mosquitoes, anopeline and culex, are as common here as elsewhere in the +Brazils--the lighters which came alongside with cargo for us conveyed +clouds of them, and they took possession of every dark nook of the +"Capella"--it is noteworthy that Serpa has the reputation, in Amazonas, +of a health resort. I could find no explanation of that. There was +malaria at Serpa, of course; but compared with the really lethal +country, a country not so different in appearance and climate, of the +upper Madeira, the salubrity of Serpa is perplexing. That virulent form +of malaria peculiar to some tropical localities is a phenomenon which +medical research has not yet explained. In the almost unexplored region +of the Rio Madeira the fever is certain to every traveller, though the +land is largely without inhabitants; and it is almost equally certain +that it will be of the malignant type. Yet at an old settlement like +Serpa, where probably every inhabitant has had malaria, and every +mosquito is likely to be a host, the fever is but mild, and the +traveller may escape it entirely. + +By now you will be asking what Itacoatiara is like, that community +contentedly lost in the secret forest. I am afraid you will not learn, +unless, in the happy future, you and I select a few friends, a few +books, and erect some houses of palm leaves to protect us from the too +vigorous sun there, and so, secure from all the really urgent and +important matters which do not matter a twinkle to the eternal stars, +noon it far and secure until the time comes for the gentle villagers to +carry us out and forget us; remembering us again when the annual Day of +the Dead comes round. They will leave some comfortable candles above us +that night. + +There the earth is a warm and luscious body. The lazy paths are cool +with groves, and in the middle hours of the sun, when only a few +butterflies are abroad, and the grasshoppers are shrilling in the quiet, +you swing in a hammock under a thatch--the air has been through some +tree in blossom--and gossip, and drink coffee. Beyond the path of the +village there is--nobody knows what; not even the Royal Geographical +Society. One heard of a large and mysterious lake a day's journey +inland. Nobody knew anything about it. Nobody cared. One old man once, +when hunting, saw its mirror through the forest's aisles, and heard the +multitude of its birds. + +The foreshore of the village is rugged with boulders richly tinctured +with iron oxide, and often having a scoriaceous surface. There we would +land, and scramble up to a street which ends on the height above the +river. It is a broad road, with white, substantial, one-story houses on +either side. The dwellings and stores have no windows, but are built +with open fronts, for ventilation. This is Serpa's main street. It is +shaded with avenues of trees. In the narrower side turnings the trees +meet to form arcades. One day we saw such an avenue covered with yellow, +trumpet-shaped blossoms. Ox-carts with solid wheels stand in the walks. +The sunlight, broken in the leaves of the trees, patterned the roads +with white fire, and so dappled the cattle that they were obscure; you +saw the oxen only when they moved. There is a large square, grass-grown, +in the centre of the village, where stands the church, a white, simple +building with an open belfry in which the bell hangs plain, bright with +verdigris. About here the merchants and tradesmen of Serpa have their +places. The men, hearty and friendly souls, walk abroad in clean linen +suits and straw hats, and their ladies, pallid, slight, but often +singularly beautiful, are dressed as Europeans, but without hats; +sometimes, when out walking late in the day, a lady would have a scarlet +flower in her hair. + +By the foreshore were the cabins, of mud and wood, of the negroes. +Beyond the town, the roads run through the clearings, and end on the +forest. In the clearings were the huts, wattle and daub, and of leaves, +of the settled Indians and half-breeds. These were often prettily placed +beneath groups of graceful palms. It was in the last direction that most +often we made our way with our butterfly nets while other folk were +sleeping during the sun's height. The humid heat, I suppose, was really +a trial. One did perspire in an alarming way and with the least +exertion. The Doctor, who carries substance, would have dark patches in +his khaki uniform, and would wonder, with foreboding, whether any more +in this life he would catch hold of a cold jug which held a straight +pint in which ice tinkled. But to me the illumination, the heat, the +odour, and the quiethood of those noons made life a great prize. I will +say that my comrade, the Doctor, did much to make it so, with his gentle +fun, and his wide knowledge of earth-lore. There was so much, wherever +we went, to keep me on the magic side of time, and out of its shadow. On +the west of the town were some huts, with plantations of bananas, +pineapples, papaws, and maize, where blossomed cannas, mimosas, +passion-flowers, and where other unseen blooms, especially after rain, +made breathing a sensuous pleasure. There we tried to intercept the +swallow-like flight of big sulphur and orange butterflies, though never +with success. We had more success with the butterflies in the clearings, +where some new huts stood, beyond the village. Over the stagnant pools +in those open spaces dragonflies hovered, fellows that moved, when we +approached, like lines of red light. The butterflies, particularly a +vermilion beauty with black bars on his wings, and a swift flier, used +to settle and gem the mud about these pools. Other species frequented +the flowering shrubs which had grown over the burnt wreckage and stumps +of the forest. That area was full of insects and birds. There we saw +daily the Sauba ants, sometimes called the parasol ants, in endless +processions, each ant holding a piece of leaf, the size of a sixpenny +bit, over its tiny body. Tanagers shot amongst the bushes like blue +projectiles. We saw a ficus there on one occasion, of fair size, with +large leathery leaves, which carried a colony of remarkable +caterpillars, each about seven inches long, thick in proportion, blue +black in colour with yellow stripes, and a coral head, and filaments at +the latter end. They were pugnacious worms, fighting each other +desperately when two met on a leaf. The larvae stripped that tree in a +day. We were not always sure that the people in this part of Serpa were +friendly. Mostly they were half-breeds, varying mixtures of Indian and +negro, and no doubt very superstitious. The rodent's foot was commonly +worn by the women, who, if we took notice of their children, sometimes +would spit, to avert the evil eye. But when the thunder clouds banked +close, and the air, being still, became loaded with the scent of the +wood fires of the villagers, promising rain, we would enter a hut, and +then always found we were welcome. + +Even when kept to the ship for any reason this country offered constant +new things to keep our thoughts moving. A regatao, the river pedlar, +would bring his roomy montario, the gipsy van of the river, his family +aboard--the wife, the grandmother, and the sad, shy, little +children--and offer us fruits, and perhaps his monkey and parrots. +Gradually the "Capella" added to her company. The Chief bought a parrot +which had many Indian and Portuguese phrases. It tried to climb a funnel +guy, in escaping the curiosity of our terrier, and fell into the river. +We fished her out with a bucket. The vampire bats came aboard every +night. They were not very terrible creatures to look at; but we +discovered they frequented the forecastle for no good purpose. Again, +stories filtered through to us of sickness on the Madeira, and abruptly +they gave the palms and the sunsets a new light. One man was brought in +from beyond and died of beri-beri. This shook the nerves of one of our +Brazilian pilots, and he refused to go beyond where we were. As for me, +there at Serpa the "Capella" was at anchor, and we were not near the +Madeira, and seemed never likely to go. I watched the sunsets. The +brief, cool evenings prompted me (fever in the future or not) to praise +and grace. Crickets chirped everywhere on the ship then, and the air was +full of the sparks of fireflies. You could smell this good earth. + +There was one sunset when the overspreading of violet clouds would have +shut out the day quite, but that the canopy was not closely adjusted to +the low barrier of forest to the westward. Through that narrow chink a +yellow light streamed, and traced shapes on the lurid walls and roof +which narrowly enclosed us. This was the beginning of the most alarming +of our daily electrical storms. There was no wind. Serpa and all the +coast facing that rift where the light entered our prison, stood +prominent and strange, and surprised us as much as if we had not looked +in that direction till then. The curtain dropped behind the forest, and +all light was shut out. We could not see across the ship. Knowing how +strong and bright could be the electrical discharges (though they were +rarely accompanied by thunder) when not heralded in so portentous a way, +we waited with some anxiety for this display to begin. It began over the +trees behind Serpa. Blue fire flickered low down, and was quickly +doused. Then a crack of light sprang across the inverted black bowl from +east to west in three quick movements. Its instant ramifications +fractured all the roof in a network of dazzling blue lines. The +reticulations of light were fleeting, but never gone. Night contracted +and expanded, and the sharp sounds, which were not like thunder, might +have been the tumbling flinders of night's roof. We saw not only the +river, and the shapes of the trees and the village, as in wavering +daylight, but their colours. One flash sheeted the heavens, and its +overbright glare extinguished everything. It came with an explosion, +like the firing of a great gun close to our ears, and for a time we +thought the ship was struck. In this effort the storm exhausted itself. + + * * * * * + +The day before we left for the Madeira we took aboard sixty head of +cattle. They were wild things, which had been collected in the campo +with great difficulty, and driven into lighters. A rope was dropped over +the horns of each beast: this was attached to a crane hook, the winch +was started, and up the poor wretch came, all its weight on its horns, +bumping inertly against the ship's side in its passage, like a bale, and +was then dumped in a heap on deck. This treatment seemed to subdue it. +Each quietly submitted to a halter. Several lost horns, and one hurt its +leg, and had to be dragged to its place. But, to our great joy--we were +watching the scene from the bridge--the Brazilian herdsmen on the +lighter shouted an anxious warning to their fellows on our deck as a +small black heifer, a potbellied lump with a stretched neck, rotated in +her unusual efforts to free her horns. She even bellowed. She bumped +heavily against the ship's side, and tried desperately to find her feet. +She was, and I offered up thanks for this benefit, most plainly an +implacable rebel. The cattlemen, as punishment for the trouble she had +given them ashore, kept her dangling over the deck, and one got level +with her face and mocked her, slapping her nose. She actually defied +him, though she was quite helpless, with some minatory sounds. She was +no cow. She was insurrection, she was the hate for tyrants incarnated. +They dropped her. She was up and away like a cat, straight for the +winchman, and tried to get the winch out of her path, bellowing as she +worked. She put everybody on that deck in the shrouds or on the +forecastle head as she trotted round, with her tail up, looking for +brutes to put them to death. None of the cows (of course) helped her. By +a trick she was caught, and her horns were lashed down to a ring bolt in +a hatch coaming. Then she tried to kick all who passed. If the rest of +the cattle had been like her none would have suffered. Alas! They were +probably all scientific evolutionists, content to wait for men to become +kindly apple-lovers by slow and natural uplift; and gravely deprecated +the action of the heifer, from which, as peaceful cows, they +disassociated themselves. + +The Indian says that if he eats a morsel of tiger he becomes fierce and +strong. I have not the faith of the Indian, or I would have begged the +heart of that heifer, and of it I would have brewed gallons of precious +liquor, and brought it home in jars for incomparable gifts to the meek +at heart who always do what the herdsmen tell them. The Doctor and I +made a pet of that black cow, to the extent of seeing she got her +rations regularly. It was no joke wading through manure among a press of +nervous animals on a ship's deck in the tropics, in order to see that a +brave creature was justly dealt with; particularly as she swore +violently whenever she saw us, looking up from her tightly tethered head +with eyes full of unabated fury, and tried to get at us on the hatch +above her, bound though she was. What a heart! For her head was fixed +immovably, unlike the others; yet, till we arrived at Porto Velho she +kept her fierce spirit, often kicking over her water bucket with her +forefeet. Curse their charity! + +With two new pilots, we upanchored next morning; and full of cattle, +flies, and new odours, and a gang of cattlemen who at least appeared +villainous, and carried long knives, the "Capella" continued up stream +for the Madeira. The cattle were sheltered, as far as possible, with +awnings improvised from spare canvas, and their fodder was bales of +American hay. The Skipper did his best to meliorate the harsh native +methods with dumb things. + +And now it seems time to explain why we are bound for the centre of the +American continent, where the unexplored jungle still persists, and +disease or death, so the legends tell us, come to all white men who stay +there for but a few months. If you will get your map of the Brazils, +begin from Para, and cruise along the Amazon to the Madeira River--you +turn south just before Manaos--when you have reached Santo Antonio on +the tributary stream you have traversed the ultimate wilderness of a +continent, and stand on the threshold of Bolivia, almost under the +shadow of the Andes. If you find any pleasure in maps, flying in shoes +of that kind when affairs pursue you too urgently (and I suppose you do, +or you would not be so far into this narrative), you will hardly thank +me when I tell you it is possible for an ocean steamer exceeding 23 feet +in draught to make such a journey, and so break the romance of the +obscure place at the end of it. But it must be said. Even one who +travels for fun should keep to the truth in the matter of a ship's +draught. As a reasonable being you would prefer to believe the map; and +that clearly shows the only way there (when the chance comes for you to +take it) must be by canoe, a long and arduous journey to a seclusion +remote, and so the more deeply desired. It certainly hurts our faith in +a favourite chart to find that its well-defined seaboard is no barrier +to modern traffic, but that, journeying over those pink and yellow +inland areas, which should have no traffic with great ships, a large +cargo steamer, full of Welsh coal, can come to an anchorage, still with +many fathoms under her, at a point where the cartographer, for lack of +place-names and other humane symbols, has set the word Forest, with the +letters spread widely to the full extent of his ignorance, and so +promised us sanctuary in plenty. I suppose that in a few years those +remote wilds, somehow cleared of Indians, jungle, and malaria--though I +do not see how all this can be done--will have no further interest for +us, because it will possess many of the common disadvantages of +civilisation's benefits: it will be a point on a regular route of +commerce. I am really sorry for you; but in the sad and cruel code of +the sailor I can only reply as Jack did when he got the sole rag of beef +in the hash, "Blow you, Bill. I'm all right." I had the fortune to go +when the route was still much as it was in the first chapter of Genesis. +"But after all," you question me, hopeful yet, "nothing can be done with +5000 tons of Welsh cargo in a jungle." + +People with the nose for dollars can do wonders. It would be unwise to +back such a doughty opponent as the pristine jungle with its malaria +against people who smell money there. In the early 'seventies there was +a man with one idea, Colonel George Church. His idea was to give to +Bolivia, which the Andes shuts out from the Pacific, and two thousand +miles of virgin forest from the Atlantic, a door communicating with the +outside world. He said, for he was an enthusiast, that Bolivia is the +richest country in the world. The mines of Potosi are in Bolivia. Its +mountains rise from fertile tropical plains to Arctic altitudes. The +rubber tree grows below, and a climate for barley is found in a few +days' journey towards the sky. But the riches of Bolivia are locked up. +Small parcels of precious goods may be got out over the Andean barrier, +on mule back; or they may dribble in a thin stream down the Beni, +Mamore, and Madre de Dios rivers--rivers which unite not far from the +Brazilian boundary to form the Rio Madeira. The Beni is a very great and +deep river which has a course of 1500 miles before it contributes its +volume to the Madeira. The Rio Madeira, a broad and deep stream in the +rainy season, reaches the Amazon in another 1100 miles. But between +Guajara-Merim and San Antonio the Madeira comes down a terrace 250 miles +in length of nineteen dangerous cataracts. The Bolivian rubber +collectors shoot those rapids in their batelaoes, large vessels carrying +sometimes ten tons of produce and a crew of a dozen men, when the river +is full. Many are overturned, and the produce and the men are lost. The +Madeira traverses a country notorious even on the Amazon for its fever, +and quite unexplored a mile inland anywhere on its banks; the rubber +hunters, too, have to reckon with wandering tribes of hostile Indians. + +The country is like that to-day. Then judge its value for a railway +route in the early 'seventies. But Colonel Church was a New Englander, +and again he was a visionary, so therefore most energetic and +compelling; he soon persuaded the practical business folk, who seldom +know much, and are at the mercy of every eloquent dreamer, to part with +a lot of money to buy his Bolivian dream. We do really find the Colonel, +on 1st November 1871, solemnly cutting the first sod of a railway in the +presence of a party of Indians, with the wild about him which had +persisted from the beginning of things. What the Indians thought of it +is not recorded. Anyhow, they seem to have humoured the infatuated man +who stopped to cut a square of grass in the land of the Parentintins, +the men who go stark naked, and make musical instruments out of the shin +bones of their victims. + +An English company of engineering contractors was given the job of +building the line, and a small schooner, the "Silver Spray," went up to +San Antonio with materials in 1872. Her captain, and some of her +officers, died on the way. A year later the contractors confessed utter +defeat. The jungle had won. They declared that "the country was a +charnel-house, their men dying like flies, that the road ran through an +inhospitable wilderness of alternating swamp and porphyry ridges, and +that, with the command of all the capital in the world, and half its +population, it would be impossible to build the road." (There is a +quality of bitterness in their vehement hate which I recognise. I heard +the same emotional chord expressed concerning that land, though not +because of failure there, only two years ago.) + +But the Bank of England held a large sum in trust for the pursuance of +this enterprise, and after the lawyers had attended to the trust money +in long debate in Chancery, there was yet enough of it left to justify +the indefatigable colonel in beginning the railway again. That was in +1876. Messrs. Collins, of Philadelphia, obtained the contract. The road, +of metre gauge, was to be built in three years. The matter excited the +United States into a wonderful attention. The press there went slightly +delirious, and the excited _Eagle_ was advised that "two Philadelphians +are to overcome the Madeira rapids, and to open up to the world a land +as fair as the Garden of the Lord." The little steamer "Mercedita," of +856 tons, with 54 engineers and material, was despatched to San Antonio +on 2nd January 1878. Her departure was made an important national +occasion, and it is an historic fact, which may be confirmed by a +reference to the files of Philadelphian papers of that date, that strong +men, as well as women and children, sobbed aloud on the departure of the +steamer. The vessel arrived at San Antonio on the 16th February. They +had barely started operations when, so they said, a Brazilian official +told them, betraying some feeling, "when the English came here they did +nothing but smoke and drink for two days, but Americans work like the +devil." Yet, by all accounts, the English method was right. I prefer it, +on the Amazon. The preface to work there should be extended to three or +even more days of drinking and smoking. + +Yet it must be said that if ever men should have honour for holding to a +duty when it was far more easy, and even more reasonable, to leave it, +then I submit the claim of those American engineers. Having lived in the +place where many of them died, and knowing their story, I feel a certain +kinship. There is no monument to them. No epic has been written of their +tragedy. But their story is, I should think, one of the saddest in the +annals of commerce. Of the 941 who left for San Antonio at different +times, 221 lost their lives, mostly of disease, though 80 perished in +the wreck of a transport ship. That is far higher a mortality rate than +that of, say, the South African or the American Civil War. + +Few of those men appeared to know the tropics. They thought "the +tropics" meant only prodigal largess of fruits and sun and a wide +latitude of life--a common mistake. The enterprise became a lingering +disaster. Their state was already bad when a supply ship was lost; and +they hopefully waited, ill and starving, but with a gallant mockery of +their lot, as their letters and diaries attest, for food and medicine +which were not to reach them. The doctors continued the daily round of +the host of the fever-stricken, giving them quinine, which was a deceit +made of flour. The wages of all ceased for legal reasons, and they were +in a place where little is cultivated, and so most food has to be +imported in spite of a tariff which usually doubles the price of every +necessary of life. Some of the survivors, despairing and heroic souls, +attempted to escape on rafts down the river; they might as well have +tried to cut their way through the thousand miles of forest between them +and Manaos. The railway undertaking collapsed again, and the clearing, +the huts, and the workshops, and the short line that was actually laid, +were left for the vines and weeds to bury. But now again the conquering +forest is being attacked. The Madeira-Mamore Railway has been +recommenced, and our steamer, the "Capella," is taking up supplies for +the establishment at Porto Velho, from which the new railway begins, +three miles this side of San Antonio. + + + + +III + + +On the morning of the 23rd January, while we were still considering, +seeing what the sun was like, and the languid air, and that we were +reduced to tinned beans, fat bacon, and butter which was oil and flies, +whether it was worth while to note our breakfast bell--the steward stood +swinging it, with the gravity of a priest, under the break of the +poop--a shout came from the bridge that the Rio Madeira was in view. + +As far back as Swansea we had heard legends of this stream, and they +were sufficiently disturbing. When we arrived at Para we heard more, and +worse. The pilot we engaged there called the Madeira the "long +cemetery." At Serpa, for the first time, we saw what happened to frail +humanity when it ventured far on the Madeira. One day a river steamer +came to Serpa, with a cargo of men from San Antonio. The river steamers +of the Amazon are vessels of broad beam and shallow draft, painted the +dingy hue of the river itself, and they have two tiers of decks, +open-air shelves, between the supports of which the passengers sling +their hammocks. The passengers do not sleep in bunks. This paddleboat +came throbbing towards where we were at anchor. It was night, and she +was unseen, a palpitation in the dark accompanied somehow by a fountain +of sparks. Such boats burn wood in their furnaces. When her noise had +ceased, and her lights imperceptibly enlarged as the current dropped her +down abeam of us, a breath of her, a draught of air, passed our way. I +am more familiar now with the odour malaria causes, but then I thought +she must have a freight of the dead. She anchored. We could see her +loaded hammocks in the light of the few lamps she carried. Through the +binoculars next morning I inspected with peculiar interest the row of +cadaverous heads, with black tousled hair, lemon-coloured skins, open +mouths and vacant eyes, which stared at us over her rails. Each looked +as though once it had peered into the eyes of doom, and then was but +waiting, caring nothing. + +There, ahead, was the Madeira now for us. We were then nearly a thousand +miles from the sea, well within South America. But that meeting-place of +the Amazon and its chief tributary was an expanse of water surprising in +its immensity. As much light was reflected from the floor as at sea. The +water was oceanic in amplitude. The forest boundaries were so far away +that one could not realise, even when the time we had been on the river +was remembered as a prolonged monotony, that this was the centre of a +continent. The forest on our port side was near enough for us to see its +limbs and its vines; but to the south-west, where we were heading for +Bolivia, and to the north, the way to the Guianas, and to the east, out +of which we had come, and to the west, where was Peru, the land was but +a low violet barrier, varying in altitude with distance, and with silver +sections in it, marking the river roads. In the north-west there was a +broad silver path through the wall, the way to the Rio Negro, Manaos, +and the Orinoco. In the south the near forest, being flooded, was a +puzzle of islands. As we progressed they opened out as a line of green +headlands. The Madeira appeared to have three widely separated mouths, +with a complexity of intermediate and connective minor ditches. Indeed, +the gate of the river was a region of inundated jungle. One began to +understand why travellers here sometimes find themselves on the wrong +river. + +Our bows turned in to the forest wall, and for a few minutes I could not +see any way for us there. The jungle parted, and we were on a narrow +turgid flood, the colour of the main river, but swifter; a majestic +forest was near to either beam. We were enclosed. And after we entered +the Madeira my dark thoughts of our future at once left me. If they +returned, it was only to be joked about, in the dry way one does refer +to a dread that has been long in the distance, and then one day takes +shape, becomes material, and settles down with us. Its form, as you +know, nearly always allays your alarms. Your simple mind has expected +something with the lowering face of evil. Lo! evil has even bright eyes. +Its nature, its dark craft which you have dreaded, is not seen, and your +mind grows light with surprise. What, only this, then? + +I never saw earth look more resplendent and chromatic than on the day +when we entered that river with a bad name. Presently, I thought--here +was a brief resurgence of the old gloom which had shrouded my +conjectural Madeira--I might be called upon to pay the price for this +surprising gift of intense colour, light, and luscious heat, for the +quickening of the blood, as though the tropic air were a stimulant as +well as a narcotic. Well, it does seem but fair, if chance, being happy, +gives you a place in the tropics, to expect to have less time there than +is given for the job of eking out a meagre existence in the north. It +would not be right to look for gain both ways. (You will have noticed +already, I suppose, that I have not been on the Madeira fifteen +minutes.) This, I thought, as I walked to and fro on the "Capella," is +different from that endurance, bitter and prolonged, in the land where +there is no sun worth mentioning, where the north-east wind blows, where +the poor rate is so and so in the pound (and you are one of the +fortunate if you pay it), and Lord Rosebery lectures on Thrift. I +mentioned this to the Doctor. He did not remove his pipe from his mouth. + +Because (the idea dawned on me as I sank into a deck chair beside the +surgeon under the poop awning, and borrowed his silver tobacco-box), +because, as to thrift and parching winds, abstinence and prudence, and +lectures by the solemn on how to thin out your life in cold climates +where all that is worth having is annexed, why praise a man who is +willing to deprave his life to sand and frost? There in merry England +the poor wretch is, where the riches of earth are not broadcast largess +as I see they are here, but are stacked on each side of the road, and +guarded by police, leaving to him but the inclement highway, with +nothing but Lord Rosebery's advice and benediction to help him keep the +wind out of the holes in his trousers; that benefit, and the bleak +consideration that he may swink all day for a handful of beans, or go +without. What is prudence in that man? It is his goodwill for the +police. To be blue nosed and meek at heart, and to hoard half the crust +of your stinted bread, is to blaspheme the King of Glory. Some men will +touch their crowns to Carnegie in heaven. + +Thrift and abstinence! They began to look the most snivelling of sins as +I watched, with spacious leisure, the near procession of gigantic trees, +that superb wild which did not arise from such niggard and flinty +maxims. Frugality and prudence! That is to regard the means to death in +life, the pallor and projecting bones of a warped existence, as good men +dwell on courage, motherhood, rebellion, and May time, and the other +proofs of vitality and growth. Now, I thought, I see what to do. All +those improving lectures, reform leagues, university settlements, labour +exchanges, and other props for crippled humanity, are idle. It is a +generative idea that is wanted, a revelation, a vision. It would be +easier and quicker to take regiments of folk out of Ancoats, Hanley, +Bethnal Green, and the cottages of the countryside, for one long glance +at the kind of earth I see now. The world would expand as they looked. +They would get the dynamic suggestion. In vain, afterwards, would the +monopolists and the superior persons chant patriotic verse to drown the +noise of chain forging at the Westminster foundry. Not the least good, +that. The folk would not hear. Their minds would be absent and outward, +not locked within to huddle with cramped and respectful thoughts. They +would not start instinctively at the word of command. They would begin +with dignity and assurance to compass their own affairs, and in an +enormous way; and they would make hardly a sound as they moved forward, +and they would have uplifted and shining eyes. ("Then you think more of +'em than I do," said the surgeon.) + +It would be no use, I saw clearly, sending the folk to Algeria, Egypt, +or New York. Such places never betray to the traveller that our world is +not a shapeless parcel of fields and buildings, tied up with bylaws, and +sealed by the Grand Lama as his last act in the stupendous work of +creation. There it is, an angular package in the sky, which the sun +reads, and directs on its way to heaven in advance of its limited +syndicate of proprietors. + +Here on the Madeira I had a vision instead of the earth as a great and +shining sphere. There were no fences and private bounds. I saw for the +first time an horizon as an arc suggesting how wide is our ambit. That +bare shoulder of the world effaced regions and constellations in the +sky. Our earth had celestial magnitude. It was warm, a living body. The +abundant rain was vital, and the forest I saw, nobler in stature and +with an aspect of intensity beyond what the Amazon forests showed, rose +like a sign of life triumphant. + +You see what that tropical wilderness did for me, and with but a single +glance. Whatever comes after, I shall never be the same again. The +complacent length of the ship was before us. Amidships were some of the +fellows staring overside, absorbed. Now and then, when his beat brought +him to the port side, I could see the head of the little pilot on the +bridge. His colleague was sleeping in one of the hammocks slung between +the stanchions of the poop awning. The Doctor was scrutinising a pair of +motuca flies which hovered about his ankles, waiting for him to go to +sleep. He wanted them for specimens. The Skipper, looking a little +anxious, came slowly up the poop ladder, crossed over, and stood by our +chairs. "The river is full of big timber," he said. He went to stare +overside, and then came back to us. "The current is about five knots, +and those trees adrift are as big as barges. I hope they keep clear of +the propeller." The Skipper's eye was uneasy. He was glum with +suspicion; he spoke of the way his fools might meet the wiles of fortune +at a time when he was below and his ship was without its acute +protective intelligence. He stood, a spare figure in white, in a limp +grass hat with flapping eaves, gazing forward to the bridge +mistrustfully. He had brought us in a valuable vessel to a place +unknown, and now he had to go on, and afterwards get us all out again. I +began to feel a large respect for this elderly master mariner (who did +not give the beard of an onion for any man's sympathy) who had skilfully +contrived to put us where we were, and now was unaware what mischance +would send us to rot under the forest wall, the bottom to fall out of +our adventure just when we were in its narrowest passage and achievement +was almost within view. "This is no place for a ship," the captain +mumbled. "It isn't right. We're disturbing the mud all the time; and +look at those butterflies now, dodging about us!" He was continuing this +monologue as a dirty cap appeared at the head of the ladder, and a long +and ragged length of sorrowful sailor mounted there, and doffed the cap. +The Skipper brusquely signed to him to approach. He was a youngster in +an advanced stage of some trouble, and he had no English. I think he was +a Swede. He demonstrated his sickness, baring his arm, muttering +unintelligibly. The limb, like his hand, was distorted with large +blisters. There was his face, too. I mistrusted my equanimity for some +moments, but braced my eyes, compelling them to be scientific and +impersonal. By signs we gathered he had been sleeping on deck, such was +the heat of the forecastle, and the mosquitoes, the Doctor said, had +poisoned a body already tainted from the stews of Rotterdam. The +corroding spirit of the jungle was beginning to permeate through our +flaws. + +The Doctor went to his surgery. The pilot sat up in his hammock, glanced +indifferently at the sick sailor, yawning and stretching his arms, his +dainty little brown feet dangling just clear of the deck. He began to +roll a cigarette of something which looked like tea. Then he dropped +out, and went forward to release his mate on the bridge, and the senior +pilot came up as the Doctor had finished his job. The junior pilot, a +fragile, girlish fellow, rather taciturn, greets us always with a +faintly supercilious smile. His chief is a round, jolly little man, +hearty, and lavish with ornamental gestures. We both smiled +involuntarily as he marched across to us, with his uniform cap, bearing +our ship's badge, stuck on the back of his head with a bias to the right +ear. There is not enough of Portuguese in our ship's company to serve +one conversation adequately, but we get on well with this pilot, and he +with us. He sits in a hammock, making pantomime explanatory of Brazil to +us strangers, and we pick him up with alacrity, after but brief pauses. +While the Doctor beguiled him into dramatic moments, I lay back and +watched him, searching for Brazilian characteristics, to report here. + +You know that, when you have returned from a far country, you are asked +unanswerable questions about its people, and especially about its women. +We are easily flattered by the suggestion that we are authoritative, +with opinions got from uncommon experience, especially where women with +strange eyes and dark skins are concerned. So, once upon a time, I +caught myself--or rather, I caught that cold, critical, and impartial +part of me, which is a solemn fake--when answering a question of this +kind, explaining in a comprehensive way the character of the Brazilian +people, as though I were telling of the objective phenomena of one +simple soul. Presently the wise and ribald part of me woke, caught the +note of that inhuman voice, and raised a derisive cry, heard by me with +grave deprecation, but not heard at all by my listener. I stopped. For +what do I know of the Brazilian character? Very little. Is there such a +thing? I suppose the true Brazilian is like the true Englishman, or the +typical bird which is known by its bones, but may be anything from a +crow to a nightingale, but is more likely a lark. You can imagine the +foreigner taking his knowledge of the British pick-pocket who met him at +the landing-stage, the pen-portraits of Bernard Shaw, the Rev. Jeremiah +Hardshell, Father O'Flynn, You, Me, the cabman who swore at him, his +landlady and her daughter, Lloyd-George, Piccadilly by night, and Tom +Bowling, carefully adjusting all that valuable British data, just as +Professor Karl Pearson does his physical statistics, and explaining the +result as the modern English; adding, in the usual footnote, what +decadent tendencies are to be deduced, in addition, from the facts which +could not be worked into the major premises. + +Now, there was the handsome Brazilian customs officer, tall, august, +with dark eyes haughty and slow with thought, the waves of his romantic +black hair faintly traced in silver, who might have been a poet, or a +philosophic revolutionist; but who was the man, as the first mate told +us (after we had searched everywhere for the articles) who "pinched your +bloomin' field-glasses and my meerschaum." + +Take, if you like, the ultra-fashionable ladies at the Para hotel, who +looked at us with sleepy eyes, and who, I suspect, were not Brazilians +at all. Supposing they were, there must be counted the wife of the +official at Serpa. She came aboard there with her husband to see an +English ship; she reminded me of that picture of the Madonna by +Sassoferrato in the National Gallery; I am unable to come nearer to +justice to her than that. Again, there was a certain vain native +apothecary, and he had the idea that I was bottle-washer to the +"Capella's" surgeon, much to that fellow's secret delight. The chemist +treated me with a studied difference in consequence; and though our +surgeon could have undeceived the mistaken man, having some Portuguese, +he refused to do so. I remember the pilot who, when he left us at Serpa, +and I bade him farewell, did, before all our ship's company, embrace me +heartily, rest his cheek against mine, and make loving noises in his +throat. And there is our present chief guide, now swinging in his +hammock, and looking down upon us waggishly. + +He had not been a pilot always. Once he was a clown in a circus; that +little fact is a clue to much which otherwise would have been obscure in +him. When he boarded us at Serpa to take the place of the man who shrank +from the thought of the Madeira, the chart-room under the bridge was +given to him, and as the mate put it, "he moved in." He had bundles, +boxes, bags, baskets, a tin trunk, a chair, a parrot, a hammock, and +some pictures. He was going to be with us for two months, but his affair +had the conclusive character of a migration, a final severance from his +old life. His friends came to see him depart, and they wound themselves +in each others arms, head laid in resignation on shoulders. "Looks as if +we're bound for the Golden Shore," commented the boatswain. + +This little rounded man, the pilot, with his unctuous olive skin, tiny +moustache of black silk, and impudent eyes, looked ripe in middle age, +though actually he was but thirty. He wore a suit of azure cotton, +ironed faultlessly, and his tunic fitted with hooks and eyes across his +throat. His boots were sulphur coloured and Parisian. A massive gold +ring, which carried a carbonado nearly as large as the stopper of a beer +bottle, was embedded in a fat finger of his right hand. In the front of +his cap he had sewn the badge of our line, and he was curiously proud of +that gaudy symbol. He would wear the cap on one ear, and walk up and +down in display, with a lofty smile, and a carriage supposed to +appertain to a British officer in a grand moment. He had a great +admiration for all that was British, except our food. If you were up at +sunrise you could see him at his toilet, and the spectacle was worth the +effort. His array of toilet vesicles reminded me of the shelves in a +barber's shop. Oiled and fragrant, he took his seat for breakfast with +much formal politeness. He shook our saloon company into a sense of its +responsibilities, for we had grown indifferent as to dress, and +sometimes we had three-day beards. His handkerchiefs and linen were +scented, and dainty with floral designs. And ours--oh, ours--! He took +wine at breakfast, and after idling a little with our foreign dishes he +would wipe his mouth on our tablecloth, and then leave for the bridge. +As he passed across the poop we would hear him hawk violently, and spit +on the deck. Then the Skipper would glare, and drive his chair backwards +in a dark passion. + + * * * * * + +Gazing at the foliage as it unfolded, our pilot named the paranas, +tributaries, and islands, when they drew abeam. He told us what the +trees were; and then with head shakes and uplifted hands and eyes, +indicated what grave things were behind that screen of leaves. (Though I +don't suppose he knew.) His mimicry was so spontaneous and exact that it +was more entertaining and just as instructive as speech. He taught us +how the Indians kill you, and what some villagers did to a naughty +padre, and how the sucuruju swallows a deer, and how to make love to a +Brazilian girl. He kicked the slippers from his little feet, and +smuggled into the hammock mesh for a snooze, waving a hand coyly to us +over the edge of his nest. + +The dinner bell rang. Because the saloon is now hot beyond endurance, +the steward has fixed a table on deck, and so, as we eat, we can see the +jungle pass. That keeps some of our mind from dwelling over much on the +dreary menu. The potatoes have begun to ferment. The meat is out of +tins; sometimes it is served as fritters, sometimes we recognise it in a +hash, and sometimes, shameless, it appears without dress, a naked and +shiny lump straight from its metal bed. Often the bread is sour. The +butter, too, is out of tins. Feeding is not a joy, but a duty. But it is +soon over. Although everybody now complains of indigestion, we have far +to go yet, and the cheerfulness which faces all circumstances brazenly +must be our manna. Our table, some deal planks on trestles, is mellowed +by a white tablecloth. We sit round on boxes. Over head the sun flames +on the awning, making it golden and translucent. I let the soup pass. +The next dish is a hot pot of tinned mutton and preserved vegetables. +Something must be done, and I do it then. There is some pickled beef and +pickled onions. I watch the forest pass. Then, for desert, the steward, +the hot beads touring about the mounts of his large pale face, brings +along oleaginous fritters of plum duff. The Doctor leaves. I follow him +to the chairs again, and we exchange tobacco-boxes and fill our pipes. +This may seem to you unendurable for long. I did not think so, though of +habits so regular and engrained that my chances of survival, when viewed +comparatively, for my ship mates were hardened and usually were more +robust, seemed poor enough. But I enjoyed it. There was nourishment, a +tonic stay, in our desire to greet every onset of the miseries, which +now were camped about us, besieging our souls, with sansculotte +insolence. We called to the Eumenides with mockery. Like Thoreau, I +believe I could live on a tenpenny nail, if it comes to that. + +There is no doubt the forest influences our moods in a way you at home +could not understand. Our minds take its light and shade, and just as +our little company, gathered in the Chief's room at a time when the seas +were running high, recalled sombre legends which told of foredoom, so +this forest, an intrusive presence which is with us morning, noon, and +night, voiceless, or making such sounds as we know are not for our ears, +now shadows us, the prescience of destiny, as though an eyeless mask sat +at table with us, a being which could tell us what we would know, but +though it stays, makes no sign. + +This forest, since we entered the Para River, now a thousand miles away, +has not ceased. There have been the clearings of the settlements from +Para inwards; but as Spruce says in his Journal, those clearings and +campos alter the forest of the Amazon no more than would the culling of +a few weeds alter the aspect of an English cornfield. The few openings I +have seen in the forest do not derange my clear consciousness of a +limitless ocean of leaves, its deep billows of foliage rolling down to +the only paths there are in this country, the rivers, and there +overhanging, arrested in collapse. There is no land. One must travel by +boat from one settlement to another. The settlements are but islands, +narrow foot-holds, widely sundered by vast gulfs of jungle. + +The forest of the Amazons is not merely trees and shrubs. It is not +land. It is another element. Its inhabitants are arborean; they have +been fashioned for life in that medium as fishes to the sea and birds to +the air. Its green apparition is persistent, as the sky is and the +ocean. In months of travel it is the horizon which the traveller cannot +reach, and its unchanging surface, merged through distance into a mere +reflector of the day, a brightness or a gloom, in his immediate vicinity +breaks into a complexity of green surges; then one day the voyager sees +land at last and is released from it. But we have not seen land since +Serpa. There are men whose lives are spent in the chasms of light where +the rivers are sunk in the dominant element, but who never venture +within its green surface, just as one would not go beneath the waves to +walk in the twilight of the sea bottom. + +Now I have been watching it for so long I see the outer aspect of the +jungles does vary. When I saw it first on the Para River it appeared to +my wondering eyes but featureless green cliffs. Then in the Narrows +beyond Para I remember an impression of elegance and placidity, for +there, the waters still being tidal and saline, the palms were +conspicuous and in profuse abundance. The great palms are the chief +feature of that forest elevation, with their graceful columns, and their +generous and symmetrical fronds which sometimes are like gigantic green +feathers, and again are like fans. A tall palm, whatever its species, +being a definite expression of life--not an agglomeration of leaves, but +body and crown, a real personality--the forest of the Narrows, populous +with such exquisite beings, had marges of straight ascending lines and +flourishing and geometrical crests. + +Beyond the river Xingu, on the main stream, the forest, persistent as a +presence, again changed its aspect. It was ragged and shapeless, an +impenetrable tangle, its front strewn with fallen trees, the vision of +outer desolation. By Obydos it was more aerial and shapely again, but +not of that light and soaring grace of the Narrows. It was contained, +yet mounted not in straight lines, as in the country of the palms, but +in convex masses. Here on the lower Madeira the forest seems of a nature +intermediate between the rolling structure of the growth by Obydos, and +the grace of the palm groves in the estuarine region of the Narrows. It +is barbaric and splendid, easily prodigal with illimitable riches, +sinking the river beneath a wealth of forms. + +On the Madeira, as elsewhere in the world of the Amazons, some of the +forest is on "terra-firma," as that land is called which is not flooded +when the waters rise. There the trees reach their greatest altitude and +diameter; it is the region of the caaapoam, the "great woods" of the +Indians. A stretch of _terra firma_ shows as a low, vertical bank of +clay, a narrow ribbon of yellow earth dividing the water from the +jungle. More rarely the river cuts a section through some undulating +heights of red conglomerate--heights I call these cliffs, as heights +they are in this flat country, though at home they would attract no more +attention than would the side of a gravel-pit--and again the bank may be +of that cherry and saffron clay which gives a name to Itacoatiara. On +such land the forest of the Madeira is immense, three or four species +among the greater trees lording it in the green tumult expansively, +always conspicuous where they stand, their huge boles showing in the +verdant facade of the jungle as grey and brown pilasters, their crowns +rising above the level roof of the forest in definite cupolas. There is +one, having a neat and compact dome and a grey, smooth, and rounded +trunk, and dense foliage as dark as that of the holm oak; and another, +resembling it, but with a flattened and somewhat disrupted dome. I +guessed these two giants to be silk-cottons. Another, which I supposed +to be of the leguminous order, had a silvery bole, and a texture of pale +green leafage open and light, which at a distance resembled that of the +birch. These three trees, when assembled and well grown, made most +stately riverside groups. The trunks were smooth and bare till somewhere +near ninety feet from the ground. Palms were intermediate, filling the +spaces between them, but the palms stood under the exogens, growing in +alcoves of the mass, rising no higher than the beginning of the branches +and foliage of their lords. The whole overhanging superstructure of the +forest--not a window, an inlet, anywhere there--was rolling clouds of +leaves from the lower rims of which vines were catenary, looping from +one green cloud to another, or pendent, like the sundered cordage of a +ship's rigging. Two other trees were frequent, the pao mulatto, with +limbs so dark as to look black, and the castanheiro, the Brazil nut +tree. + +The roof of the woods lowered when we were steaming past the igapo. The +igapo, or aqueous jungle, through which the waters go deeply for some +months of the year, is of a different character, and perhaps of a lesser +height--it seems less; but then it grows on lower ground. I was told to +note that its foliage is of a lighter green, but I cannot say I saw +that. It is in the igapo that the Hevea Braziliensis flourishes, its +pale bole, suggestive of the white poplar, deep in water for much of the +year, and its crown sheltered by its greater neighbours, so that it +grows in a still, heated, and humid twilight. This low ground is always +marked by growths of small cecropia trees. These, with their white +stems, their habit of free and regular branching, and their long leaves, +digital in the manner of the horse-chestnut, have the appearance of +great candelabra. Sometimes the igapo is prefaced by an area of cane. +The numberless islands, being of recent formation, have a forest of a +different nature, and they seldom carry the larger trees. The upper ends +of many of the islands terminate in sandy pits, where dwarf willows +grow. So foreign was the rest of the vegetation, that notwithstanding +its volume and intricacy, I detected those humble little willows at +once, as one would start surprised at an English word heard in the +meaningless uproar of an alien multitude. + +The forest absorbed us; as one's attention would be challenged and drawn +by the casual regard, never noticeably direct, but never withdrawn, of a +being superior and mysterious, so I was drawn to watch the still and +intent stature of the jungle, waiting for it to become vocal, for some +relaxing of its static form. Nothing ever happened. I never discovered +it. Rigid, watchful, enigmatic, its presence was constant, but without +so much as one blossom in all its green vacuity to show the least +friendly familiarity to one who had found flowers and woodlands kind. It +had nothing that I knew. It remained securely aloof and indifferent, +till I thought hostility was implied, as the sea implies its impartial +hostility, in a constant presence which experience could not fathom, nor +interest soften, nor courage intimidate. We sank gradually deeper +inwards towards its central fastnesses. + +By noon on our first day on the Madeira we reached the village of +Rozarinho, which is on the left bank, with the tributary of the same +name a little more up stream, but entering from the other side. Here, as +we followed a loop of the stream, the Madeira seemed circumscribed, a +tranquil lake. The yellow water, though swift, had so polished a surface +that the reflections of the forest were hardly disturbed, sinking below +the tops of the inverted trees to the ultimate clouds, giving an +illusion of profundity to the apparent lake. The village was but a +handful of leaf huts grouped about the nucleus of one or two larger +buildings with white walls. There was the usual jetty of a few planks to +which some canoes were tied. The forest was a high background to those +diminished huts; the latter, as we came upon them, suddenly increased +the height of the trees. + +In another place the shelter of a family of Indians was at the top of a +bank, secretive within the base of the woods. A row of chocolate babies +stood outside that nest, with four jabiru storks among them. Each bird, +so much taller than the babies, stood resting meditatively on one leg, +as though waiting the order to take up an infant and deliver it +somewhere. None of them, storks or infants, took the least notice of us. +Perhaps the time had not yet come for them to be aware of mundane +things. Certainly I had a feeling myself, so strange was the place, and +quiet and tranquil the day, that we had passed world's end, and that +what we saw beyond our steamer was the coloured stuff of dreams which, +if a wind blew, would wreathe and clear; vanish, and leave a shining +void. The sunset deepened this apprehension. There came a wonderful sky +of orange and mauve. It was over us and came down and under the ship. We +moved with glowing clouds beneath our keel. There was no river; the +forest girdled the radiant interior of a hollow sphere. + +The pilots could not proceed at night. Shortly after sundown we +anchored, in nine fathoms. The trees were not many yards from the +steamer. When the ship was at rest a canoe with two Indians came +alongside, with a basket of guavas. They were shy fellows, and each +carried in his hand a bright machete, for they did not seem quite sure +of our company. After tea we sat about the poop, trying to smoke, and, +in the case of the Doctor and the Purser, wearing at the same time veils +of butterfly nets, as protection from the mosquito swarms. The netting +was put over the helmet, and tucked into the neck of the tunic. Yet, +when I poked the stem of the pipe, which carried the gauze with it, into +my mouth, the veil was drawn tight on the face. A mosquito jumped to the +opportunity, and arrived. Alongside, the frogs were making the deafening +clangour of an iron foundry, and through that sound shrilled the +cicadas. I listened for the first time to the din of a tropical night in +the forest. There is no word strong enough to convey this uproar to ears +which have not listened to it. + + * * * * * + +_Jan. 24._ A bright still sunrise, promising heat; and before breakfast +the ship's ironwork was too hot to touch. The novelty of this Madeira is +already beginning to merge into the yellow of the river, the blue of the +sky, and the green of the jungle, with but the occasional variation of +low roseous cliffs. The average width of the river may be less than a +quarter of a mile. It is loaded with floating timber, launched upon it +by "terras-cahidas," landslides, caused by the rains, which carry away +sections of the forest each large enough to furnish an English park with +trees. Sometimes we see a bight in the bank where such a collapse has +only recently occurred, the wreckage of trees being still fresh. Many of +the trees which charge down on the current are of great bulk, with half +their table-like base high out of the water. Occasionally rafts of them +appear, locked with creepers, and bearing flourishing gardens of weeds. +This characteristic gives the river its Portuguese name, "river of +wood." The Indians know the Madeira as the Cayary, "white river." + +Its course to-day serpentines so freely that at times we steer almost +east, and then again go west. Our general direction is south-west. At +eight this morning, after some anxious moments when the river was +dangerous with reefs, we passed the village of Borba, 140 miles from +Serpa. Here there is a considerable clearing, with kine browsing over a +hummocky sward that is well above the river on an occurrence of the red +clay. This release of the eyes was a smooth and grateful experience +after the enclosing walls. Some steps dug in the face of the low cliff +led to the white houses, all roofed with red tiles. The village faced +the river. From each house ascended the leisurely smoke of early +morning. The church was in the midst of the houses, its bell conspicuous +with verdigris. Two men stood to watch us pass. It was a pleasant +assurance to have, those roofs and the steeple rising actually into the +light of the sky. The dominant forest, in which we were sunk, was here +definitely put down by our fellow-men. + +We were beyond Borba, and its parana and island just above it, before +the pilot had finished telling us, where we watched from the "Capella's" +bridge, that Borba was a settlement which had suffered much from attacks +of the Araras Indians. The river took a sharp turn to the east, and +again went west. Islands were numerous. These islands are lancet-shaped, +and lie along the banks, separated by side channels, their paranas, from +the land. The smaller river craft often take a parana instead of the +main stream, to avoid the rush of the current. The whole region seems +lifeless. There is never a flower to be seen, and rarely a bird. +Sometimes, though, we disturb the snowy heron. On one sandy island, +passed during the afternoon, and called appropriately, Ilho do Jacare, +we saw two alligators. Otherwise we have the silent river to ourselves; +though I am forgetting the butterflies, and the constant arrival aboard +of new winged shapes which are sometimes so large and grotesque that one +is uncertain about their aggressive qualities. As we idle on the poop we +keep by us two insect nets, and a killing-bottle. The Doctor is making a +collection, and I am supposed to assist. + +When I came on deck on the morning of our arrival in the Brazils it was +not the orange sunrise behind a forest which was topped by a black +design of palm fronds, nor the warm odour of the place, nor the height +and intensity of the vegetation, which was most remarkable to me, a +new-comer from the restricted north. It was a butterfly which flickered +across our steamer like a coloured flame. No other experience put +England so remote. + +A superb butterfly, too bright and quick to be anything but an escape +from Paradise, will stay its dancing flight, as though with intelligent +surprise at our presence, hover as if puzzled, and swoop to inspect us, +alighting on some such incongruous piece of our furniture as a coil of +rope, or the cook's refuse pail, pulsing its wings there, plainly +nothing to do with us, the prismatic image of joy. Out always rush some +of our men at it, as though the sight of it had maddened them, as would +a revelation of accessible riches. It moves only at the last moment, +abruptly and insolently. They are left to gape at its mocking retreat. +It goes in erratic flashes to the wall of trees and then soars over the +parapet, hope at large. + +Then there are the other things which, so far as most of us know, have +no names, though a sailor, wringing his hands in anguish, is usually +ready with a name. To-day we had such a visitor. He looked a fellow the +Doctor might require, so I marked him down when he settled near a hatch +on the afterdeck. He was a bee the size of a walnut, and habited in dark +blue velvet. In this land it is wise to assume that everything bites or +stings, and that when a creature looks dead it is only carefully +watching you. I clapped the net over that fellow and instantly he +appeared most dead. Knowing he was but shamming, and that he would give +me no assistance, I stood wondering what I could do next; then the cook +came along. The cook saw the situation, laughed at my timidity with +tropical forms, went down on his knees, and caught my prisoner. The cook +raised a piercing cry. + +On the bridge I saw them levelling their glasses at us; and some +engineers came to their cabin doors to see us where we stood on the +lonely deck, the cook and the Purser, in a tableau of poignant tragedy. +The cook walked round and round, nursing his suffering member, and I did +not catch all he said, for I know very little Dutch; but the spirit of +it was familiar, and his thumb was bleeding badly. The bee had resumed +death again. The state of the cook's thumb was a surprise till the +surgeon exhibited the bee's weapons, when it became clear that thumbs, +especially when Dutch and rosy, like our cook's, afforded the right +medium for an artist who worked with such mandibles, and a tail that was +a stiletto. + +In England the forms of insect life soon become familiar. There is the +housefly, the lesser cabbage white butterfly, and one or two other +little things. In the Brazils, though the great host of forms is +surprising enough, it is the variety in that host which is more +surprising still. Any bright day on the "Capella" you may walk the +length of the ship, carrying a net and a collecting-bottle, and fill the +bottle (butterflies, cockroaches, and bugs not admitted), and perhaps +have not three of a species. The men frequently bring us something +buzzing in a hat; though accidents do happen half-way to where the +Doctor is sitting, and the specimen is mangled in a frenzy. A hornet +came to us that way. He was in violet armour, as hard as a crab, was +still stabbing the air with his long needle, and working on a fragment +of hat he held in his jaws, But such knights in mail are really +harmless, for after all they need not be interfered with. It is the +insignificant little fellows whose object in life it is to interfere +with us which really make the difference. + +So far on the river we have not met the famous pium fly. But the motuca +fly is a nuisance during the afternoon sleep. It is nearly of the size +and appearance of a "blue-bottle" fly, but its wings, having black tips, +look as though their ends were cut off. The motucas, while we slept, +would alight on the wrists and ankles, and where each had fed there +would be a wound from which the blood steadily trickled. + +The mosquitoes do not trouble us till sundown. But one morning in my +cabin I was interested in the hovering of what I thought was a small, +leggy spider which, because of its colouration of black and grey bands, +was evasive to the sight as it drifted about on its invisible thread. At +last I caught it, and found it was a new mosquito. In pursuing it I +found a number of them in the cabin. When I exhibited the insect to the +surgeon he did not well disguise his concern. "Say nothing about it," he +said, "but this is the yellow-fever brute," So our interest in our new +life is kept alert and bright. The solid teak doors of our cabins are +now permanently fixed back. Shutting them would mean suffocation; but as +the cabins must be closed before sundown to keep out the clouds of +gnats, the carpenter has made wooden frames, covered with copper gauze, +to fit the door openings at night, and rounds of gauze to cap the open +ports; and with a damp cloth, and some careful hunting each morning, one +is able to keep down the mosquitoes which have managed to find entry +during the night and have retired at sunrise to rest in dark corners. +For our care notwithstanding the insects do find their way in to assault +our lighted lamps. The Chief, partly because as an old sailor he is a +fatalist, and partly because he thinks his massive body must be +invulnerable, and partly because he has a contempt, anyway, for +protecting himself, each morning has a new collection of curios, alive +and dead, littered about his room. (I do not wonder Bates remained in +this land so long; it is Elysium for the entomologist.) One of the live +creatures found in his room the Chief retains and cherishes, and hopes +to tame, though the object does not yet answer to his name of Edwin. +This creature is a green mantis or praying insect, about four inches +long, which the Chief came upon where it rested on the copper gauze of +his door-cover, holding a fly in its hands, and eating it as one would +an apple. This mantis is an entertaining freak, and can easily keep an +audience watching it for an hour, if the day is dull. Edwin, in colour +and form, is as fresh, fragile, and translucent as a leaf in spring. He +has a long thin neck--the stalk to his wings, as it were--which is quite +a third of his length. He has a calm, human face with a pointed chin at +the end of his neck; he turns his face to gaze at you without moving his +body, just as a man looks backwards over his shoulder. This uncanny +mimicry makes the Chief shake with mirth. Then, if you alarm Edwin, he +springs round to face you, frilling his wings abroad, standing up and +sparring with his long arms, which have hooks at their ends. At other +times he will remain still, with his hands clasped up before his face, +as though in earnest devotion, for a trying period. If a fly alights +near him he turns his face that way and regards it attentively. Then +sluggishly he approaches it for closer scrutiny. Having satisfied +himself it is a good fly, without warning his arms shoot out and that +fly is hopelessly caught in the hooked hands. He eats it, I repeat, as +you do apples, and the authentic mouthfuls of fly can be seen passing +down his glassy neck. Edwin is fragile as a new leaf in form, has the +same delicate colour, and has fascinating ways; but somehow he gives an +observer the uncomfortable thought that the means to existence on this +earth, though intricately and wonderfully devised, might have been +managed differently. Edwin, who seems but a pretty fragment of +vegetation, is what we call a lie. His very existence rests on the fact +that he is a diabolical lie. + +Gossamers in the rigging to-day led the captain to prophesy a storm +before night. Clouds of an indigo darkness, of immense bulk, and +motionless, reduced the sunset to mere runnels of opaline light about +the bases of dark mountains inverted in the heavens. There was a rapid +fall of temperature, but no rain. Our world, and we in its centre on the +"Capella," waited for the storm in an expectant hush. Night fell while +we waited. The smooth river again deepened into the nadir of the last of +day, and the forest about us changed to material ramparts of cobalt. The +pilot made preparations to anchor. The engine bell rang to stand-by, a +summons of familiar urgency, but with a new and alarming note when heard +in a place like that. The forest made no response. A little later the +bell clanged rapidly again, and the pulse of our steamer slowed, ceased. +We could hear the water uncoiling along our plates. The forest itself +approached us, came perilously near. The Skipper's voice cried abruptly, +"Let go!" and at once the virgin silence was demolished by the uproar of +our cable. The "Capella" throbbed violently; she literally undulated in +the drag of the current. We still drifted slowly down stream. The second +anchor was dropped, and held us. The silence closed in on us instantly. +Far in the forest somewhere, while we were whispering to each other in +the quiet, a tree fell with a deep, significant boom. + + * * * * * + +_Jan. 25._ We had been under way for more than an hour when my eyes +opened on the illuminated panorama of leaves and boles unfolding past +the door of my cabin. The cicadas were grinding their scissors loudly in +the trees alongside. I spent much of this day on the bridge, where I +liked to be, watching the pilot at work. The Skipper was there, and in a +cantankerous mood. The pilot wants us to make a chart of the river. He +has given the captain and me a long list of islands, paranas, +tributaries, villages, and sitios. Every map and reference to the river +we have on board is valueless. A map of the river indicates many +settlements with beautiful names; and at each point, when we arrive, +nothing but the forest shows. How the cartographers arrived at such +results is a mystery. This river, which their generous imaginings have +seen as a tortuous bough of the Amazon, laden with villages which they +indicate on their maps with marks like little round fruits, is almost +barren. Every day we pass small sitios or clearings; maybe the +map-makers mean such places as those. Yet each clearing is but a brief +security, a raft of land--the size of the garden of an English +villa--lonely in an ocean of deep leaves, where a rubber man has built +himself a timber house, and some huts for his serfs. It will have a +jetty and a huddle of canoes, and usually a few children on the bank +watching us. We salute that place with our syren as we pass, and +sometimes the kiddies spring for home then as though we were shooting at +them. Or we see a little embowered shack with a pile of fuel logs beside +it, and a crude name-board, where the river boats replenish when +traversing this stream, during the season, for rubber. Our pilots have +much to say of these stations, and of all the rubber men on the river +and their wealth. But away with their rubber! I am tired of it, and will +keep it out of this book if I can. For it is blasphemous that in such a +potentially opulent land the juice of one of its wild trees should be +dwelt upon--as it is in the states of Amazonas and Para--as though it +were the sole act of Providence. The Brazilians can see nothing here but +rubber. The generative qualities of this land through fierce sun and +warm showers--for rarely a day passes without rain, whatever the +season--a land of constant high summer with a free fecundity which has +buried the earth everywhere under a wild growth nearly two hundred feet +deep, is insignificant to them. They see nothing in it at all but the +damnable commodity which is its ruin. Para is mainly rubber, and Manaos. +The Amazon is rubber, and most of its tributaries. The Madeira +particularly is rubber. The whole system of communication, which covers +34,000 miles of navigable waters, waters nourishing a humus which +literally stirs beneath your feet with the movements of spores and +seeds, that system would collapse but for the rubber. The passengers on +the river boats are rubber men, and the cargoes are rubber. All the talk +is of rubber. There are no manufactures, no agriculture, no fisheries, +and no saw-mills, in a region which could feed, clothe, and shelter the +population of a continent. There was a book by a Brazilian I saw at +Para, recently published, and called the "Green Hell" (Inferno Verde). +On its cover was the picture of a nude Indian woman, symbolical of +Amazonas, and from wounds in her body her blood was draining into the +little tin cups which the rubber collector uses against the incisions on +the rubber tree. From what I heard of the subject, and I heard much, +that picture was little overdrawn. I begin to think the usual commercial +mind is the most dull, wasteful, and ignorant of all the sad wonders in +the pageant of humanity. + +It is only on the "Capella's" bridge that you feel the stagnant air +which is upset by the steamer's progress. There it spills over us, heavy +with the scent of the lairage on the fore deck. The bridge is a narrow, +elevated outlook, full in the sun's eye, where I can get a view of the +complete ship as she serpentines in her narrow way. On the port side of +it the Skipper has a seat, and there now he sits all day, gazing moodily +ahead. The dapper little pilot stands centrally, throwing brief commands +over his shoulder into the open window of the wheelhouse, where a +sailor, gravely chewing tobacco, his hands on the wheel, is as rapt as +though in a trance. I think the pilot finds his way by divination. The +depth of the river is most variable. In the dry season I hear the stream +becomes but a chain of pools connected by threads which may be no more +than eighteen inches deep, the rest of its bed being dry mud +cross-hatched by sun cracks. The rains in far Bolivia, overflowing the +swamps there, during some months of the year increase the depth of the +Madeira by forty-five feet. The local rainy season would make hardly any +difference to it. The river is fed from reservoirs which stretch beneath +the Andes. + +There is rarely anything to show why, for a spell, the pilot should take +us straight ahead in mid-stream, and then again tack to and fro across, +sometimes brushing the foliage with our shrouds. I have plucked a bunch +of leaves in an unexpected swoop in-shore. And the big timber comes down +afloat to meet us in a never-ending procession; there are the propellor +blades to be thought of. I see, now and then, the swirls which betray +rocks in hiding, and when dodging those dangerous places the screw +disturbs the mud and the stinks. But the pilot takes us round and about, +we with our 300 feet of length and 23 feet draught, as a man would steer +a motor car. To aid it our rudder has had fixed to it a false wooden +length. The "Capella" is a very good girl, as responsive to the pilot's +word as though she knew that he alone can save her. She stems this +powerful current at but four knots, and sometimes we come to places +where, if she hesitated for but two seconds, we should be put athwart +stream to close the channel. And what would happen to us with nothing +but unexplored malarial forest each side of us is not useful to brood +on. Occasionally the pilot, grasping the top of the "dodger," stares +beyond us fixedly to where the refracted sunshine is blinding between +the green cliffs, and gives quick and numerous orders to the wheelhouse +without turning his head. The Skipper gets up to watch. The "Capella" +makes surprising swerves, the pilot nervously taps the boards with his +foot.... Then he says something quietly, relaxes, and comes to us +blithely, the funny dog with a nonsense story, and the Skipper sinks +couchant again. Once more I watch the front of the jungle for what may +show there. Seldom there is anything new which shows. It is rare, even +when close alongside, that one can trace the shape of a leaf. There are +but the conspicuous grey nests of the ants and wasps. Yet several times +to-day I saw trees in blossom; domes of lilac in the green forest roof. +Again, to-day we put up a flight of hundreds of ducks; and another +incident was a blackwater stream, the Rio Mataua, the line of +demarcation between the Madeira's yellow flood and its dark tributary +being distinct. + + * * * * * + +_Jan. 26._ The forest is lower and more open, and the pao mulatto is +more numerous. We saw the important village of Manicore to-day, and +Oncas, a little place within a portico of the woods which was veiled in +grey smoke, for they were coagulating rubber there. For awhile before +sunset the sky was scenic with great clouds, and glowing with the usual +bright colours. The wilderness was transformed. Each evening we seem to +anchor in a region different, in nature and appearance, under these +extraordinary sunset skies, from the country we have been travelling +since daylight. Transfiguration at eventime we know in England. Yet +sunset there but exalts our homeland till it seems more intimately ours +than ever, as though then came a luminous revelation of its rare +intrinsic goodness. We see, for some brief moments, its aura. But this +tropical jungle, at dayfall, is not the earth we know. It is a celestial +vision, beyond physical attaining, beyond knowledge. It is ulterior, +glorious, transient, fading before our surprise and wonder fade. We of +the "Capella" are its only witnesses, except those pale ghosts, the +egrets about the dim aqueous base of the forest. + +Darkness comes quickly, the swoop and overspread of black wings. The +stopping of the ship's heart, because the pulsations of her body have +had unconscious response in yours, as by an incorporeal ligament, is the +cessation of your own life. At a moment there is a strange quiet, in +which you begin to hear the whisper of inanimate things. A log glides +past making faint labial sounds. You are suddenly released from prison, +and float lightly in an ether impalpable to the coarse sounds and +movements of earth, but which is yet sensitive to the most delicate +contact of your thoughts and emotions. The whispering of your fellows is +but the rustling of their thoughts in an illimitable and inviolate +silence. + +Then, almost imperceptibly, the frogs begin their nightlong din. The +crickets and cicadas join. Between the varying pitch of their voices +come other nocturnes in monotones from creatures unknown to complete the +gamut. There are notes so profound, but constant, that they are a mere +impression of obscurity to the hearing, as when one peers listening into +an abysm in which no bottom is seen, and others are stridulations so +attenuated that they shrill beyond reach. + +A few frogs begin it. There are ululations, wells of mellow sound +bubbling to overflow in the dark, and they multiply and unite till the +quality of the sound, subdued and pleasant at first, is quite changed. +It becomes monstrous. The night trembles in the powerful beat of a +rhythmic clangour. One cannot think of frogs, hearing that metallic din. +At one time, soon after it begins, the chorus seems the far hubbub, +mingled and levelled by distance, of a multitude of people running and +disputing in a place where we who are listening know that no people are. +The noise comes nearer and louder till it is palpitating around us. It +might be the life of the forest, immobile and silent all day, now +released and beating upwards in deafening paroxysms. + +Alongside the engine room casing amidships the engineers have fixed an +open-air mess-table, with a hurricane lamp in its midst, having but a +brief halo of light which hardly distinguishes the pickle jar from the +marmalade pot. A haze of mosquitoes quivers round the light. The air is +hot and lazy, and the engineers sit about limply in trousers and shirts, +the latter open and showing bosoms as various as faces. The men cheer +themselves with comical plaints about the heat, the food, the Brazils, +and make sudden dabs at bare flesh when the insects bite them. The Chief +rallies his boys as would a cheery dad--Sandy, though, is nearly his own +age, but still much of a lad, quietly despondent--and the Chief heartily +insists on food, like it or lump it. I go forward to the captain's tea +table on the poop deck, where we have two hurricane lamps, and where the +figures of us round the table, in that dismal glim, are the thin +phantoms of men. The lamps have been lighted only that moment, and as we +take our seats, the insects come. Just as sharply as though something +derisive and invisible were throwing them at us, big mole crickets +bounce into our plates. A cicada, though I was then unaware of his +identity, a monstrous fly which looked as large as a rat, and with a +head like a lantern, alighted before me on the cloth, and remained +still. Picking it up tentatively it sprang a startling police rattle +between my finger and thumb, and the other chaps shouted their +merriment. The steward places a cup of tea before each of us, and in an +interval of the talk the Skipper announces a smell of paraffin in his +cup. We experiment with ours, and gravely confirm. The surgeon, bending +close to a light with his cup, the deep characteristics of his face +strongly accentuated--he seems but a bodiless head in the dark--says he +detects globules of fat. The Skipper crudely outlines this horror to the +steward, who makes an inaudible reply in German, and disappears down the +companion. We get a new and innocent brew. + +There is hash for us. There is our familiar the pickled beef. There are +saucers of brown onions. There are saucers of jam and of butter. +To-night the steward has baked some cakes, and their grateful smell and +crisp brown rugged surface, studded with plums, determine in my mind a +resolution to eat four of them, if I can get them without open shame. I +assert that our Skipper has a counting eye for the special dishes; +though you may eat all the hash you want. Damn his hash! The bread is +sour. I want cakes. + +After tea the pilots get into their hammocks and under their curtains, +out of the way of the mosquitoes. We know where they are because of the +red ends of their cigarettes. We sit around anywhere, the Skipper, the +Chief, the Doctor and the Purser. There is little to be said. We talk of +the mosquitoes, in ejaculations, for the little wretches quite easily +penetrate linen, and can manage even worsted socks. Occasionally flying +insects bump into the tin lamp placed above us on the ice chest. (No; +there is no ice.) Thin divergent arrows of light, the fireflies, lace +the gloom, and the trees alongside are gemmed with them. We find still +less to say to each other, but fear to retire to our heated berths, for +as it is just possible to breathe in the open we continue to defy the +mosquitoes. The first mate serenades us on his accordion. At last there +is no help for it. The steward comes to tell the master that his cot is +ready. The "old man" sleeps in a cot draped with netting, and slung from +the awning beams on the starboard side. Nightly he turns in there, and +unfailingly a rain cloud bursts in the very early morning, pounding on +the awning till the cool spray compels him, and he retreats in his +pyjamas for shelter, taking his pillow with him. It is for that reason I +do not use the cot he made for me, which hangs on the port side; though +it is delightful for the afternoon nap. + +The Skipper disappears. The Doctor and I go below to the surgery, and +from the settee there he removes books, tobacco tins, fishing tackle, +phials, india rubber tubing, and small leather cases, making room for us +both, and first we have some out of his bottle, and then we try some out +of mine. The stuff is always tepid, for the water in the carafe has a +temperature of 80 degrees. The perspiration begins a steady permeation +as we talk, for now we can talk, and talk, being together, and talking +is better than sleep, which at its best is but a fitful doze in the +tropics. We fall, as it were, on each other's necks. Though the Doctor's +breast--I say nothing of mine--is not one which appears to invite the +weak tear of a fellow mortal who is harassed by solitude. You might +judge it too cold, too hard and unresponsive a support, for that; and I +have seen his eye even repellent. He is not elderly, but he is grey, and +pallid through too much of the tropics. The lines descending his face +show he has been observing things for long, and does not think much of +them. When disputing with him, he does not always reply to you; he +smiles to himself; a habit which is an annoyance to some people, whose +simple minds are suspicious, and who are unaware that the surgeon is +sometimes forgetful that his weaker brethren, when they are most heated +and disputative with him, then most lack confidence in their case, and +need the confirmation of the wit they know is superior. That is no time +when one should look at the wall, and smile quietly. The "Capella's" +company feel that the surgeon stands where he overlooks them, and they +see, where he stands unassumingly superior, that he looks upon them +politely. They do not know he is really sad and forgetful; they think he +is amused, but that he prefers to pretend he is well bred. I must +confess it is known he has prescience having a certain devilish quality +of penetration. There was one of our stokers, and one night he was drunk +on stolen gin, and latitudinous, and so attempted a curious answer to +the second engineer, who sought him out in the forecastle concerning +work. Now the second engineer is a young man who has a number of +photographs of himself which display him, clad but in vanity and shorts, +back, front, and profile, arms folded tightly to swell his very large +muscles. He has really a model figure, and he knows it. The cut over the +stoker's nose was a bad one. + +To the surgeon the stoker went, early next morning, actually for a hair +of the dog, but with a story that he was then to go on duty, and so +would miss his ration of quinine, which is not served till eleven +o'clock. The quinine, as you know, is given in gin. The surgeon +complimented the man on such proper attention to his health, and +willingly gave him the quinine--in water. He also stood at the door of +the alleyway to watch the man retained the quinine as far as the engine +room entrance. + +Eight bells! Presently I also must go and pretend to sleep. The +surgeon's last cheery comment on the cosmic scheme remains but as a wry +smile on our faces. We grope in our minds desperately for a topic to +keep the talk afloat. There goes one bell! + +I arrive at my haunt of cockroaches, where the second mate is already +asleep on the upper shelf. The brown light of the oil lamp has its +familiar flavour, and the cabin is like an oven. What a prospect for +sleep! Raising the mosquito curtain carefully I slip through the opening +like an acrobat, hoping to be ahead of the insidious little malaria +carriers. A drove of cockroaches scuttles wildly over my warm mattress +as I arrive. Striking matches within what the sailor overhead calls my +meat safe, I examine my enclosure carefully for mosquitoes, but none +seems to be there, though I know very well I shall find at least a +dozen, gorged with blood, in the morning. The iron bulkhead which +separates my bed from the engine room is, of course, hot to the touch. +The air is a passive weight. The old insect bites begin to irritate and +burn. I kick the miserable sheet to the foot, and lie on my back without +a movement, for I fear I may suffocate in that shut box. My chest seems +in bonds, and for long there is no relief, though the body presently +grows indifferent to the misery, and the anxiety goes. It is remarkable +to what brutality the body will submit, when it knows it must. Yet +nothing but a continuous effort of will kept the panic suppressed, and +me in that box, till the feeling of anxiety had passed. Thenceforward +the sleepless mind, like a petty balloon giddy on a thin but unbreakable +thread of thought, would tug at my consciousness, revolving and dodging +about, in spite of my resolution to keep it still. If I could only break +that thread, I said to myself, turning over again, away it would fly out +of sight, and I should forget all this ... all this.... And presently it +broke loose, and dwindled into oblivion. + +Then I knew nothing more till I saw, fixed where I was in hopeless +horror, the baby face of one I dwell much upon, in moments of solitude, +and it had fallen wan and thin, and was full of woe unutterable, and its +appealing eyes were blind. I woke with a cry, sitting up suddenly, the +heart going like a rapid hammer. There was the curtained box about me. +The clothes were on the hooks. I could see the black shape of the cabin +doorway. By my watch it was four o'clock. The air had cooled, and as I +sat waiting for the next thing in the silence the mate snored profoundly +overhead. Ah! So that was all right. + + * * * * * + +_Jan. 27._ This has been a day of anxious navigation, for the river has +had frequent reefs. We remain in a stagnant chasm of trees. The surgeon +and I, accompanied by a swarm of flies, went forward into the cattle +stew this morning to see how the beasts fared. The patient brutes were +suffering badly, and some, quite plainly, were dying. The change from +the lush green stuff of the Itacoatiara swamps to compressed American +hay put under their noses on an iron deck, and the stifling heat under +partial awnings, had ruined them. Some stood, heads down, legs +straddled, too indifferent to disperse the loathly clouds of parasites. +Most were plagued by ticks, which had the tenacity and appearance of +iron bolt heads. But the little black cow, the rebel, blared at us, +bound and suffering as she was. Vive la revolution! We drove the flies +from her hide, and she tried to kick us, the darling. We found a steer +with his shoulder out of joint, lying inert in the sun, indifferent to +further outrage. That had to be seen to, and we told the Skipper, who +ordered it to be killed. We wanted some fresh meat badly, he added. The +boatswain explained that he knew the business, and he brought a long +knife, and quite calmly thrust it into the front of the prone creature, +and seemed to be trying to find its heart. Nothing happened, except a +little blood and some convulsive movements. Another sailor produced a +short knife and a hammer, and tapped away behind the horns as though he +were a mason and this were stone. The frowning surgeon supposed the +fellow was trying to sever the vertebrae. I don't know. Yet another +fellow jumped on its abdomen. At last it died. I put down merely what +happened. No two voyages are alike, and as this episode came into mine, +here it is, to be worked in with the sunsets and things. There was some +cheerful talk at the prospect of the first fresh meat since England, and +later, passing the cook's galley, I saw an iron bin, and lifted its +cover to see what was there. And there was, as I judged there would be, +liver for tea that evening. But I learned that though I am a carnivore +yet I have not the pluck to be a vulture. + +The next day we passed the Cidada de Humayta, the chief town on the +Madeira. Actually it was of the size of an unimportant home village. +There was nothing there to support the pilot's sonorous title of cidada. +For some reason we were visited to-day by an extraordinary number of +butterflies. One large specimen was of an olive green, barred with +black. Another had wings of a bluish grey, striped with vermilion. +Helicons came, and once a morpho, the latter a great rarity away from +the interior of the woods. At four in the afternoon the sky grew +ominous. We had just time to notice the trees astern suddenly convulsed, +writhing where they stood, and the storm sprang at us, roaring, ripping +away awnings and loose gear. The noise in the forest round us was that +of cataclysm. The rain was an obscurity of falling water, and the trees +turned to shadows in a grey fog. The ship became full of waterspouts, +large streams and jets curving away from every prominence. This lasted +for but twenty minutes; but the impending clouds remained to hasten +night when we were in a place which, more than anything I have seen, was +the world before the coming of man. The river had broadened and +shallowed. The forest enclosed us. There were islands, and the rank +growth of swamps. We could see, through breaks in the igapo, extensive +lagoons beyond, with the high jungle brooding over empty silver areas. +Herons, storks, and egrets were white and still about the tangle of +aqueous roots. It was all as silent and other world as a picture. + + * * * * * + +_Jan. 29._ When shouting awakened me this morning I saw the Chief hurry +by my cabin, half-dressed, and looking very anxious. By the almost +stationary foliage I could see the ship had merely way on her. Out I +jumped. On the forecastle head a crowd was gathered, peering overside. A +large tree was balanced accurately athwart our stem, and refused to +move. What worried the staff was that it would, when free, sidle along +our plates till it fouled the propeller. The propeller had to be kept +moving, for the river was narrow and its current unusually rapid. There +the log obstinately remained for the most of an hour, but suddenly made +up its mind, and went, clearing the stern by inches. After that the +engines were driven full, for the pilot hoped to get us to Porto Velho +by nightfall. In the late afternoon, when passing the Rio Jamary, the +clouds again banked astern, bringing night before its time, and another +violent storm compelled an early anchorage. The forest was remarkably +quiet after the tumult of the squall, and the "Capella" had been put +over to the left bank, when close to us on the opposite shore there was +a landslip. We saw a section of the jungle wall sway, as though that +part was taken by a local tempest, and then the green cliff and its +supports fell bodily into the river, raising thunderous submarine +explosions. Such landslides, terras cahidas, can be rarely foreseen, and +are a grave danger to craft when they come close in to rest at night. +To-day we passed a small raft drifting down. A hut was erected in its +middle, and we saw two men within. + + * * * * * + +_Jan. 30._ Talk enough there has been of a place called Porto Velho, a +name I heard first when I signed the articles of the "Capella" at +Swansea, and of what would happen to us when we arrived. But I am +looking upon it all as a strange myth. There has been time to prove +those superstitions of Porto Velho. And what has happened? There was a +month we had of the vacant sea, and one day we came upon a low coast +where palms grew. There has been a month which has striped the vacant +mind in three colours, constant in relative position, but without form, +yellow floor, green walls, and a blue ceiling. Plainly we have got +beyond all the works of man now. We have intrigued an ocean steamer +thousands of miles along the devious waterways of an uninhabited +continental jungle, and now she must be near the middle of the puzzle, +with voiceless regions of unexplored forest reeking under the equatorial +sun at every point of the compass. The more we advance up the Amazon and +Madeira rivers the less the likelihood, it seems to me, of getting to +any place where our ship and cargo could be required. We shall steam and +steam till the river shallows, the forest closes in, and we are trapped. +Yet the Madeira looks now much the same as when we entered it, still as +broad and deep. I was thinking this morning we might go on so for ever; +that this adventure was all of the casual improbabilities of a dream was +in my mind when, smoking the after breakfast pipe on the bridge, we +turned a corner sharply, and there was the end of the passage within a +mile of us, Porto Velho at last. + +The forest on the port side ahead was uplifted on an unusually high +cliff of the red rock. Beyond that cliff was a considerable clearing, +with many buildings of a character different from any we had seen in the +country. At the end of the clearing the forest began again, unconquered +still, standing across our course as a high barrier; for, leaving Porto +Velho, the river turned west almost at a right angle, and vanished; as +though now it were done with us. We had arrived. A rough pier was being +thrown out on palm boles to receive us, but it was not ready. We +anchored in five fathoms, about thirty yards from the shore, and in the +quiet which came with the stop of the ship's life we waited for the next +thing, all hands lining the "Capella's" side surveying this place of +which we had heard so much. + +Plainly this was not the usual village. Many acres of trees had been +newly cleared, leaving a great bay in the woods. The earth was still raw +from a recent attack on what had been inviolate from time's beginning. +Trenches, new red gashes, scored it, and holes were gouged in the hill +side. You could think man had attacked the forest here in a fury, but +had spent his force on one small spot, as though he had struck one wound +again and again. The fight was over. The footing had been won, a base +perhaps for further campaigns because wooden emergency houses, sheds and +barracks, had been built. The assailant evidently had made up his mind +to settle on his advantage, though he was tolerating a little quickly +rebellious scrub. Just then he was resting, as if the whole affair had +been over but five minutes before we came, and now the conqueror was +sleeping on his first success. Completely round the conquered space the +jungle stood indifferently regarding the trifle of ground it had lost. +The jungle on the near opposite shore rose straight and uninterrupted +from the river, the front rank, lost each way in distance, of an +innumerable army. At the upper end of the clearing the jungle began +again on our side, and turned to run across our bows, the complement of +the host across the water, and both ranks continued up stream, dark and +indeterminate lines converging, till, three miles away, a delicate +flickering of light, a mere dimmer, faint but constant, bridged the two +walls. No doubt that delicate light would be the San Antonio cataracts, +the first of the nineteen rapids of the Madeira. + +Porto Velho behaved as though we were not there. A pitiless sun flamed +over that deep red wound in the forest, and they who had made it were in +their shelters, resting out of sight after such a recent riot of +exertion. Nothing was being done then. Two or three white men stood on +the dismantled foreshore, placidly regarding us. We might have been +something they were not quite sure was there, a possibility not +sufficiently interesting for them to verify. There was a hint of +mockery, after all our anxiety and travail, in this quiet disregard. Had +we arrived too late to help, and so were not wanted? I confess I should +not have been surprised to have heard suppressed laughter, some light +hilarity from the unseen, at us innocently puzzling as to what was to +happen next. There was a violent scream in the forest near our bows, and +we turned wondering to that green wall. A locomotive ran out from the +base of the trees, still screaming. + +In a little while a man left a house, striding down over the debris to +the foreshore, and some half-breeds brought him in a canoe to the +"Capella." He was a tall youngster, an American, and his slow body +itself was but a thin sallow drawl; only his eyes were alert, and they +darted at ours in quick scrutiny. His solemn occupying assurance and +accent precipitated reality. He was a doctor and he ordered us to be +mustered on the after deck for inspection for yellow fever. We were +passed; and then this doctor went below to the saloon, distributing his +long limbs and body over several chairs and part of the table, and began +with lazy words and gestures to give us a place in the scene. We learned +we should stay as we were till the pier was finished and that the +railway was actually in being for a short distance. He said something +about Porto Velho being hell. + +He left us. We sat about on deck furniture, and waited on the unknown +gods of the land to see what they would send us. All day in the clearing +figures moved about on some mysterious business, but seldom looked at +us. We had nothing to do but to watch the raft of timber and flotsam +expand about our hawsers, a matter of some concern to us, for the +current ran at six knots. Our brief sense of contact got from the +medical inspection had gone by night. Reality contracted, closing in +upon the "Capella" with rapidly diminishing radii as the light went, +till we had lost everything but our steamer. + +Into the saloon, where some of us sat listening in sympathy to the +Skipper's growls that night, burst our cook, disrespectful and tousled, +saying he had seen a canoe, which bore a light, overturn in the river. +There was a stampede. We each seized a lantern and leaned overside with +it, with that fatuous eagerness to help which makes a man strike matches +when looking for one who is lost on a moor. Ghostly logs came floating +noiselessly out of darkness into the brief domain of our lanterns, and +faded into night again. From somewhere in the collection of driftwood +beyond our bows we thought we heard an occasional cry, though that might +have been the noise of water sucking through the rubbish, or the +creaking of timbers. Our chief mate got out a small boat, and vanished; +and we were already growing anxious for him when his luminous grin +appeared below in the range of my lantern, and with him came the +ponderous figure of a man. The latter, deft and agile, came up the rope +ladder, and stepped aboard with innocent inconsequence, shocking my +sense of the gravity of the affair; for this streaming object, lifted +from the grip of the boney one just in time, was chuckling. "Say," said +this big ruddy man to our gaping crowd, "I met a nigger ashore with a +letter for the captain of this packet. Said he didn't know how to get. +So I brought it, but a tree overturned the canoe. I came up under the +timber jam all right, all right, but it took me quite a piece to get my +head through." In the saloon, with a pool of water spreading round him, +while we got him some dry clothes, he produced this pulpy letter. "Dear +Captain" (it ran), "I'm as dry as hell, have you brought drinks in the +ship?" + +The bland indifference of Porto Velho to the "Capella," which had done +so much to get there; the locomotive which ran screaming out of those +woods where, till then, was the same unbroken front which from Para +inwards had surrendered nothing; the inconsequential doctor who +carefully examined us for what we had not got; the ruddy man who rose to +us streaming out of the deeps, as though that were his usual approach, +bearing another stranger's unreasonable letter complaining of thirst, +were most puzzling. I even felt some anxiety and suspicion. What, then, +were all the other incidents of our difficult six thousand mile voyage? +What was this place to which we had come on urgent business long and +carefully deliberated, where men merely looked at the whites of our +eyes, or changed wet clothes in the saloon, or lightly referred to +hell--they all did that--as if hell were an unremarkable feature of +their day? Were all these unrelated shadows and movements but part of a +long and witless jest? The point of it I could not see. Was there any +point to it or did casual episodes appear at unexpected places till they +came, just as unexpectedly, to an empty end? The man the mate had +rescued sat at the saloon table opposite me, leaning a yard wide chest, +which was almost bare, on the red baize, his bulging arms resting before +him, and his hairy paws easily clasped. I thought that perhaps this +imperturbable being, who could come with easy assurance, his bright +friendly eyes merely amused, his large firm mouth merely mocking, and +his face heated, from a desperate affair in which his life nearly went, +to announce to strangers, "Boys, I'm old man Jim," must have had the +point of the joke revealed to him long since, and so now had no respect +for its setting, and could have no care and understanding of my anxious +innocence. He sat there for hours in quiet discourse. I listened to him +with my ears only, his words jostling my thoughts, as one would puzzle +over and listen to a superior being which had unbent to be intimate, but +was outside our experience. I heard he had been at this place since +1907. He began the work here. Porto Velho did not then exist. Off where +we were anchored, the jungle rose. He had his young son with him, a +cousin, and two negroes, and he began the railway. Inside the trees, he +said, they could not see three yards, but down it all had to come. There +is a small stingless bee here, which "old man Jim" called the sweat bee. +It alights in swarms on the face and hands, and prefers death to being +dislodged from its enjoyment. The heat, these bees, the ants, the pium +flies, the mosquitoes, made the existence of Jim and his mates a misery. +Jim merely drawled about in a comic way. Fever came, and mistrust of +natives compelled him to dress a dummy, put that in his hammock at +night, while he slept in a corner of the hut, one eye open, nursing a +gun. I could not see "old man Jim" ever having faith that trains would +run, or needed to run, where Indians lurked in the bush, and jaguars +nosed round the hut at night. Why these sufferings then? But we learned +the line now penetrated into the forest for sixty miles, and that beyond +it there were camps, where surveyors were seeing that further way was +made, and beyond them again, among the trees of the interior, the +surveyors were still, planning the way the line should run when it had +got so far. + + * * * * * + +Though we could not get ashore, there was enough to watch, if it were +only the men leisurely driving palm boles into the river, making a pier +for us. While at breakfast to-day a canoe of half-breeds came flying +towards us in pursuit of an object which kept a little ahead of them in +the river. It passed close under our stern, and we saw it was a peccary. +The canoe ran level with it then, and a man leaned over, catching the +wild pig by a hind leg, keeping its snout under water while another +secured its feet with rope. It was brought aboard in bonds as a present +for the Skipper, who begged the natives to convey it below to the +bunkers and there release it. He said he would tame it. I saw the eye of +the beast as it lay on the deck champing its tusks viciously, and +guessed we should have some interesting moments while kindness tried to +reduce that light in its eye. The peccary disappeared for a few days. + +There being nothing to do this fine morning, we watched the cattle put +ashore. This was not so difficult a business as shipping them, for the +beasts now submitted quietly to the noose which was put on their horns. +The steam tackle hoisted them, they were pushed overside, and dropped +into the river. Some natives in a canoe cleared the horns, and the +brute, swimming desperately in the strong current, was guided to the +bank. Some of the beasts being already near death they were merely +jettisoned. The current bore them down stream, making feeble efforts to +swim--food for the alligators. We waited for the turn of the black +heifer. She was one of the last. She was not led to the ship's side. The +tackle was attached to her horns, and made taut before her head was +loosed. She made a furious lunge at the men when her nose was free, but +the winch rattled, and she was brought up on her hind legs, blaring at +us all. In that ugly manner she was walked on two legs across the deck, +a heroine in shameful guise, while the men laughed. She was hoisted, and +lowered into the river. She fought at the waiting canoe with her feet, +but at last the men released her horns from the tackle. With only her +face above water she heaved herself, open mouthed, at the canoe, trying +to bite it, and then made some almost successful efforts to climb into +it. The canoe men were so panic-stricken that they did nothing but +muddle one another's efforts. The canoe rocked dangerously. This wicked +animal had no care for its own safety like other cattle. It surprised +its tormentors because it showed its only wish was to kill them. Just in +time the men paddled off for their lives, the cow after them. Seeing she +could not catch them, she swam ashore, climbed the bank, looking round +then for a sight of the enemy--but they were all in hiding--and then +began browsing in the scrub. + +As leisurely as though life were without end, the work on the pier +proceeded; and we on the "Capella," who could not get ashore, with each +of our days a week long, looked round upon this remote place of the +American tropics till it seemed we had never looked upon anything else. +The days were candent and vaporous, the heat by breakfast-time being +such as we know at home in an early afternoon of the dog-days. The +forest across the river, about three hundred yards away, from sunrise +till eight o'clock, often was veiled in a white fog. There would be a +clear river, and a sky that was full day, but not the least suspicion of +a forest. We saw what seemed a limitless expanse of bright water, which +merged into the opalescent sky walls. Such an invisible fog melted from +below, and then the revelation of the dark base of the forest, in +mid-distance, was as if our eyes were playing tricks. The forest +appeared in the way one magic-lantern picture grows through another. The +last of the vapour would roll upwards from the tree-tops for some time, +and you could believe the woods were smouldering heavily. Thenceforward +the quiet day would be uninterrupted, except for the plunge of a heavy +fish, the passing of a canoe, a visit from an adventurous visitor from +the shore, or the growing of a cloud in the sky. We tried fishing, +though never got anything but some grey scaleless creatures with feelers +hanging about their gills. It was not till the evening when the visitors +usually came that the day began really to move. The new voices gave our +saloon and cabins vivacity, and the stories we heard carried us far and +swiftly towards the next breakfast-time. They were strange characters, +those visitors, usually Americans, but sometimes we got an Englishman or +a Frenchman. They took possession of the ship. + +There was an elderly man, Neil O'Brien, who was often with us. At first +I thought he was a very exceptional character. He was one of the first +to visit our ship. I even felt a little timidity when alone with him, +for he had a habit of sitting limply, looking at nothing in particular, +and dumb, and plainly he was a man whose thoughts ran in ways I could +not even surmise. His pale blue eyes would turn upon me with that +searching openness which may mean childish innocence or madness, and I +could not forget the whispers I had heard of his dangerously inflammable +nature. I could not find common footing with him for some time. My +trouble was that I had come out direct from a country where few men are +free, and so most of us live in doubt of what would happen to us if we +were to act as though we were free men. Where, if a self-reliant man +contemptuously dares to a bleak and perilous extremity, he makes all his +lawful fellows in-draw their timid breaths; that land where even a +reward has been instituted, as for merit, for uncomplaining endurance +under life-long hardships, and called an old-age pension. You cannot +live much of your life with natural servants, the judicious and +impartial, the light shy, and those who look twice carefully, but never +leap, without betraying some reflected pallor of their anaemia. O'Brien, +the quiet master of his own time, with his eyes I could not read, and +his gun, betrayed obliquely in our casual talks together such an +ingenuous indifference to accepted things and authority, that I had +nothing to work with when gauging him. He was his own standard of +conduct. I judged his bearing towards the authority of officials would +be tolerant, and even tender, as men use with wilful children. He was +not a rebel, as we understand it, one who at last grows impatient and +angry, and so votes for the other party. I suppose he was not opposed to +authority, unless it were opposed to him. He was outside any authority +but his own. He lived without State aid. He himself carried the gun, +always the symbol of authority, whether of a man or of a State, and if +any man had attempted to rob him of his substance, certainly O'Brien +would have shot that man according to his own law and his own prophecy, +and would then have cooked his supper. He surprised me for a day or two. +I puzzled much over this phenomenon of a free man, who took his freedom +so quietly and naturally that he never even discussed the subject, as we +do, with enthusiasm, in England. What else? It was long since he was +separated from his mother. Soon I found he was but a type. I met others +like him in this country. Their innocence of the limitations of a +careful man like myself was disconcerting. Once O'Brien casually +proposed that I should "beat it," cut the ship, and make a traverse of +that wild place to distant Colombia, to some unknown spot by the +approximate source of a certain Amazon tributary, where he knew there +was gold. First I laughed, and then found, from his glance of resentful +candour, that he was quite serious. He generously meant this honour for +me; and I think it was an honour for an elderly, quiet, and seasoned +privateer like O'Brien, to invite me to be his only companion in a +region where you must travel with alert courage and wide experience, or +perish. I have learned since he has gone to that far place alone. But +what a time he will have. He will have all of it to himself. Well--I was +thinking, when I refused him, of my old age pension. I should like to +get it. + +Men like O'Brien are called here, quite respectfully, "bad men," and +"land sailors." The lawless lands of the South American +republics--lawless in this sense, that their laws need be little +reckoned by the daring, the strong, and the unscrupulous--seem +particularly attractive to men of the O'Brien type. I got to like them. +I found them, when once used to their feral minds, always entertaining, +and often instructive, for their naive opinions cut our conventions +across the middle, showing the surprising insides. They dwell without +bounds. As I have read somewhere, we do not think of the buffalo, which +treats a continent as pasturage, as we do of the cow which kicks over +the pail at milking time and jumps the yard fence. These men regard +priest, magistrate and soldier with an indifference which is not even +contemptible indifference. They are merely callous to the calculated +effect of uniforms. When in luck, they are to be found in the cities, +shy and a little miserable, having a good time. Their money gone, they +set out on lonely journeys across this continent which show our fuss +over authentic explorers to be a little overdone. O'Brien was such a +man. He told me he had not slept under a roof for years. He had no home, +he confessed to me once. Any place on the map was the same to him. He +had spent his life drifting alone between Patagonia and Canada, looking +for what he never found, if he knew what he was looking for. His travels +were insignificant to him. He might have been a tramp talking of English +highways. As he droned on one evening I began to doubt he was unaware +that his was an extraordinary narrative. I guessed his unconcern must be +an air. It would have been, in my case. I looked straight over at him, +and he hesitated nervously, and stopped. Was he wasting my time, he +asked? Prospecting for his illusion, his last journey was over the +Peruvian Andes into Colombia. He broke an arm in a fall on the +mountains, set it himself, and continued. On the Rio Japura an Indian +shot an arrow through his leg, and O'Brien dropped in the long grass, +breaking the arrow short each side of the limb, and in an ensuing long +watchful duel presently shot the Indian through the throat. And then, +coming out on the Amazon, his canoe overturned, and the pickle jar full +of gold dust was lost. He put no emphasis on any particular, not even on +the loss of his gold. + +He was pointed out to me first as a singular fellow who kept doves; a +tall, gaunt man, with a deliberate gait, perhaps fifty years of age, in +old garments, long boots laced to the knees, and a battered pith helmet. +He strolled along with his eyes cast down. If you met him abroad, and +stopped him, he answered you with a few mumbles while looking away over +your shoulder. His big mouth drew down a grizzled moustache cynically, +and one of his front teeth was gold plated. Before he passed on he +looked at you with the haughty but doubtful stare of an animal. He +seemed too slow and dull to be combustible. I ceased to credit those +tales of his berserker rage. He always moved in that deliberate way, as +if he were careful, but bored. Or he stood before his doves, and made +bubbling noises in his loose, stringy throat. He embarrassed me with a +present of many of the trophies he had secured in years of travel in the +wilds. One day a negro and O'Brien were in mild dispute on the jetty, +and the negro called the white a Yankee. The river was twenty feet below +swiftly carrying its logs. O'Brien took the big black, and with vicious +ease threw him into the water. The negro missed the floating rubbish, +and struck out for the bank. No one could help him. By good luck he +managed to get to the waterside; yet O'Brien meanwhile had hurried his +long legs over the ties of the skeleton structure, his face +transfigured, and was waiting for the negro to emerge, a spade in his +hand. But under other circumstances I have not the least doubt he would +have fought the Brazilian army single-handed, and so finished, in +defence of that same negro. + + + + +IV + + +Night brought one of these men to each of our cabins, and put a party of +them drinking in the saloon. After my habit of thinking of people in +crowds, as an Anglican Church, or an ethical society, a labour movement, +a federation of proprietors, or suffragists, or Jews, or stockbrokers' +clerks, crowds moving with massed exactitude by the thousand at least, +when prompted, this man O'Brien standing on his two legs by himself, old +man Jim, and the rest, each of them defending and running his own +particular kingdom, and governing that, ill or well--for I saw them +fairly drunk now and then--and never waiting for a word from any master +or delegate, made me wonder whether till then I had met a living man, or +had heard merely of a population of bundles of newspapers. These men had +no leaders. They attended to all that. Each had to find his own way. +They were unrelated to anything I knew, and beyond the help of even a +candidate for Parliament. I suppose they had never heard of a Defence +League. They could have found no use for it, because a challenge to +defend themselves would never catch them unwilling or unable. Each man +soldiered himself, and perhaps was rather too ready to deal with a show +of insolence, or an assumption of power in another. Yet they were not +the violent and headstrong fellows of romantic tales. They were simple +and kind, submitting with a sick smile to the prickly ridicule of their +fellows round the board. They regarded meat, drink, and tobacco as +common; they were ready to leap into the dark for a friend. + +There was one young bearded Englishman among them who was more than a +friendly figure to me. All were friendly; but the Americans bore +themselves with the easy assurance of the favoured heirs of Adam; though +their successful work in that tropical swamp perhaps justified them. The +Englishman had less of that assurance of a unique favour which was so +completely bestowed that irresolution never shook the aplomb of its +lucky inheritors. He came into my cabin one night, hoping he was not +disturbing me, and bringing as a present a sheaf of native arrows tipped +with red and blue macaw feathers, as he had promised. + +"They come from Bolivia--forest Indians--three hundred miles from here." +He explained he had reached our point in the Brazilian forest from the +Pacific side. He had crossed the mountains, descended to the level +jungle at the base of the Andean wall, and followed the rivers eastward, +alone in a canoe till he chanced upon our steamer unloading Welsh fuel +into a forest clearing. To a new-comer in a mysterious land, this was a +clear invitation to listen, and I looked at the man expectantly. He was +lighting his pipe. The country through which he must have passed was +unknown, as our maps showed. But he simply indicated that manner of his +advent, as though it were the same as any other, and sat looking through +the door of my cabin, smoking, absently gazing at the night scene on the +afterdeck. + +The hombres were working at the hold immediately below us, their labours +made obscurely bright by a roaring flame of volatalised oil. The light +pulsed on the face of the Englishman, and chequered my cabin in black +and luminous gold. Of all the region of forest about us nothing showed +but a cloud of leaves, which leaned towards us out of the night, +supported on two pale, tremulous columns. The hold of the ship was a +black rectangle, and the almost naked negroes and brown men moving about +it, or peering into the chasm, were like sinister figures on an +inscrutable business about the verge of the pit. They were not men, but +the debris of men, moving with awful volition, merely a bright +cadaverous mask hovering in a void, or two arms upheld, or a black +headless trunk. For the roaring illuminant on deck dismembered the ship +and its occupants, bursting into the weight of surrounding night as a +fixed explosion, beams rigid and glowing, and shadows in long solid bars +radiating from its incandescent heart. + +"I'm glad you're here," said my companion. He never gave me his name, +and I do not know it now. "I hav'n't heard home talk for a year. Hav'n't +heard much of anything. A little Spanish coming along; and here some +American." + +We continued looking at the puzzling, disrupted scene outside for some +time without speaking, secure in a chance and lucky sympathy. Then a +basket of coal tipped against a hatch coaming and whirled away, +scattering the men. We rose to see if any were hurt. + +"Curious, this desperate haste, isn't it?" said the Englishman. "At +every point of the compass from here there's at least a thousand miles +of wilderness. Excepting at this place it wouldn't matter to anybody +whether a thing were done to-night, or next week, or not at all. But +look at those fellows--you'd think this was a London wharf, and a tide +had to be caught. Here they are on piece-work and overtime, where +there's nothing but trees, alligators, tigers, and savages. An unknown +Somebody in Wall Street or Park Lane has an idea, and this is what it +does. The potent impulse! It moves men who don't know the language of +New York and London down to this desolation. It begins to ferment the +place. The fructifying thought! Have you seen the graveyard here? We've +got a fine cemetery, and it grows well. Still, this railway will get +done. Yes, people who don't know what it's for, they'll make a little of +it, and die, and more who don't know what it's for, and won't use it +when it's made, they'll finish it. This line will get its freights of +precious rubber moving down to replenish the motor tyres of +civilisation, and the chap who had the bright idea, but never saw this +place, and couldn't live here a week, or shovel dirt, or lay a track, +and wouldn't know raw rubber if he saw it, he'll score again. Progress, +progress! The wilderness blossoms as the rose. It's wonderful, isn't +it?" + +I was just a little annoyed. After all, I was part of the job. I'd made +my sacrifices, too. But I admitted what he said. Why not? It was +something, that fancy, that every rattle of the winch outside, bringing +up another load, moved abruptly under the impulse of another thought +from London Town--six thousand miles away; two months' travel. Great +London Town! It was true. If London shut off its good will that winch +would stop, and the locomotives would come to a stand to rot under the +trees, and the lianas would lock their wheels; and in a month the forest +would have foundered the track under a green flood. Where the American +accent was dominant, the jaguars would moan at night. That long wound in +the forest would be annealed and invisible in a year. While it +persisted, the idea could conquer and maintain. + +"Yes, but it's all chance," said the Englishman. + +"That uncertain and impersonal will controls us. Have you ever worked +desperately, the fever in your bones, at a link in a job the rest of +which was already abandoned, though you didn't know it? Yet perhaps even +so there is something gained, the knowledge that all you do is fugitive, +that there is nothing but an idea, which may be withdrawn without +warning at any moment, under the most complicated and inspiring +structure. Having that fore-knowledge you can work with a light heart, +secure against betrayal, ready with your own laugh when the mockery +comes. A community finds it must have a bridge; Wall Street hears of it, +and finances a contractor, who finds an architect to design it. An army +builds it. And then this blessed old planet moves in its sleep, and the +obstructing river flows another way. Well for us we can rarely see the +beginning and the end of the work we are doing. Most of the men on this +job have not been here three months. They come and shovel a little dirt, +and die. Or they get frightened, and go. But that idea, that remains +here, using up men and forests, using up all that comes within its +invisible influence, drawing in material and pressing it into its unseen +mould, so that out of the invisible sprouts a railway, projecting length +by length, transmuted men and timber. A courtier once gave his cloak to +Queen Elizabeth to save her feet; but what is that when these men give +their bodies to make an easier road for the commerce of their fellows? +They say every sleeper on a tropical line represents a man. The +conquering human, who lives by dying! + +"The unseen idea remains--some stranger's idea--of gain; profit out of a +necessity not his, filled by other men unknown to him. You can't escape +it. First and last, it uses you. It uses you up. You may twist and +double, but 'when me you fly, I am the wings,' as Emerson says. Once, +once, I deliberately tried to escape from it, to get out of its range. I +thought it was local, that idea, a mean and local urge. I believed I had +escaped it too. I was young, though, then. But we all try when we're +young. There is but one way of escape--you may use up others; but that +isn't an easy way of escape, for some of us. + +"No alternative but that, and a man cannot take it. There you are; use, +or be used. Once I thought I had escaped. Once upon a time, every +morning at eight o'clock, I went to an office in Leadenhall Street. Know +that place? My first job. I was one in a crowd of fifty clerks. We sat +on high stools, facing each other across double-desks. There were brass +rails above each desk, where we rested ledgers and letter baskets. Each +of us marked his stool somewhere with a personal symbol. My own, my sole +point of vantage there, my support in life, that high stool; and I would +have been prepared to maintain it upright--following our office code of +honour, I as firm as may be upon it--even if, treacherously blabbing, I +had had to deprive all my fellow-clerks of their supports in life. We +were not a community, working out a common ideal. An idea used us. And +that was a job I got as a favour, mark you. Some one had known my dead +father. + +"I knew the name of my boss, but that was all. I never spoke to him. I +used to see him, a middle-aged man with sad eyes and a petulant mouth, +clean shaved, and bald headed. He came in a carriage every morning, and +went straight to a room kept from us by opaque glass. I used to wonder +what he did in there. He rarely came into the office. When he did come +into it, his was the only voice which ever spoke there above a whisper; +a sharp, startling, and minatory voice. But we rarely saw him there. A +bell would ring, a sinister summons on the ceiling over the desk of a +principal clerk, and that chap would drop anything he was doing, +anything, and go. I've seen my senior clerk, an elderly man in +spectacles, jump as if he'd been struck when his bell whirred. It was +such an awfully solemn place. Nobody ever thought of calling across that +room, but would go round to another desk, and whisper. You felt you were +part of a grave and secret plot, scribbling away to bring it to a +completion, and that all your fellow-conspirators were possible +traitors. + +"But the plot was never complete. It went on and on, day after day, in +an everlasting, suffocating sanctity, with the opaque shining glass +front of the private room overlooking us, a luminous face entirely +blank, though you knew the brain behind it saw everything, and was aware +of all. It even knew old Beckwith, my senior, had got deeply into debt +through his wife's doctor's bills, and had been fool enough to go to the +moneylenders. His bell sprang a summons one morning; in Beckwith went; +came out again, looking grey, poor old perisher, went straight to the +hat rack, passed awkwardly through the swing doors, letting in a burst +of traffic noise from the street, while we watched him furtively, and +that was the last of Beckwith. I have heard our boss was a rigid +moralist. He said a man who drank, gambled, or got into debt, not being +able to control his own life, was no good for the business of another +man. A system should have no bowels. Out the incompetent had to go. It +was Spartan, but it paid twenty per cent., I've heard. Once we had a +rebellious interruption of our sacred quiet, but only once. I never knew +exactly why it was. We had a huge factory somewhere in the East +End--Cubitt Town way--and one afternoon a woman came to the counter, and +asked for the cashier. She was so obviously East End, in a shawl, that +the counter clerk was shocked at the bare idea of it. She kept demanding +the cashier. The clerk politely, but nervously, because of her rising, +emotional voice, resisted her. She began to shout. We all stopped to see +what would happen. Shouting there! She was still crying out--she wanted +justice for a daughter whose body had got into a machine, I think--and +the cashier was forced to appear. I was surprised that he was so quiet +with her. She was weeping hysterically at our polished mahogany counter, +with its immaculate blotters, and flat, crystal ink-pots, where there +were men in silk hats, looking at the unusual scene sideways and +smiling. She could not be pacified; and suddenly she picked up an +ink-pot, and hurled it through that frozen glass face of the private +room. A devastating crash. The shocking, raucous horror of blasphemy. +The silence following was unendurable. We looked to the private door for +outraged power to appear. Nothing happened. A policeman came and removed +the woman, the cashier smiling indulgently at the officer, and shaking +his head. The system, after a momentary halt, moved on again, broad, +serene, and irresistible. + +"I never catch the smell of an open Bible now but it conjures a picture +of that arid office, angular, polished, and hard, where the ledgers +before the disciplined men exude a dusty, leathery smell. But there I +stayed for years, smelling it, and making out bills of lading and +invoices. It was my lot. There was a junior who assisted me, a chap with +flat, shiny hair parted in the middle. He had a habit of whispering +about girls, when he was not whispering about the music hall last night, +or the football next Saturday. When the cashier, a young man, and a +relative of the boss, came walking down the avenue of desks, his sharp +eyes narrowed to slits, and his mouth a little open, it was funny to see +my junior put on speed, and get an intent and earnest look in his face. + +"When I was done for the day, I'd get my book out of my bag, and wonder, +going home, whether I'd ever see those places I read about, Java, India, +and the Congo, where you went about in a white helmet and a white +uniform, and did things in a large, directive way, helping Indians and +niggers to make something of their country. Not this niggling, selfish, +pretty chandlery written large in stone, mahogany, and glass, disguised +in magnitude and gravity. Cocoanut palms and forests with untold tales. +But like the boys who found fun with the girls, with music halls and +football, but were afraid of the sack. I did nothing. I was even afraid +of the girls. + +"One day as usual I went with some of the other fellows to lunch, at an +A.B.C. shop. We always went there. The girls knew us and would smile at +our jokes. Small coffee and a scone and butter. My life! I found a +_Telegraph_ some one had left on a chair, and I read it more because I +didn't want to listen to that virulent abuse of our mean cashier--he +certainly was mean--than because I wanted to read. In it, by chance, I +noticed an advertisement for a book-keeper who would go to the tropics. +That I noted. Of course, I stood no chance. But I could try. + +"That night at home I wrote an application. I wrote it, I think, a dozen +times, till the letter was impeccable, a thing of beauty and precision. +I felt this was a most momentous affair. Whether it was the excitement +of doing something in the veritable direction of romance, or whether it +was through reading 'Waterman's Wanderings' I don't know, but I remember +a curious dream I had that night. I was alone in a forest which made me +afraid and expectant. It was still and secretive. You know the empty +stage in an unnatural, rosy light, with a glorified distance in which +you expect a devil or a fairy queen to appear. There was a hammock +hanging motionless from a branch. Something was in it, but I could not +see what. That hammock was as still as the leaves hanging over it. Then +the hammock shook, and a girl rose in it and smiled at me. She was tiny, +but adult, and her eyes were shining in the dusk of her hair, which fell +thickly over her little, coffee-coloured breasts. + +"A telegram came for me, just as I was leaving for the office one +morning. It required me to call on Mr. Utah R. Brewster at the Hotel +Palace, that very day, but at a time when I should have been +industriously at work for another. The question was, should I catch that +morning 'bus I had never missed--or take all the possibilities beyond +this door which promised to open on romance? I made up my mind, which +went drunk with rebellion. I got into my seventh-day clothes. Utah R. +Brewster and freedom! The Blackwall 'bus--do you remember those old +hearses, with a straight companion-ladder to the upper deck where the +outside passengers sat, knees up, back to back along the middle?--well, +it had to go by the office, and I was actually in doubt whether, aware +of my unprecedented revolt, it would stop outside the familiar glum +office and lawfully refuse to budge till I alighted. It went on, +blundering past the place, all strangely unconscious of what it was +doing, bearing me with my courage screwed down to bursting-point. The +driver even said what a lovely May morning it was. + +"The Hotel Palace! I had often seen that ornate building when Saturday +afternoon release took me west. Red carpeting on the steps, a glimpse of +ferns, women all as strange as exotics going in and out, and between me +and it a chasm which cut clear to the very centre of the earth. I +carried my attack beyond the portals. It was nothing, after all. A +flunkey put me in a chair too full of cushions to be easy, and I watched +men and women who, at that time of the day, when all the folk I knew +were making desperate and cunning efforts to keep their places here +safe--I watched those men and women behaving as though all eternity were +theirs, and it was the angels' business to bear them up. It was as great +a mystery to me whose every week-day morning was the inviolate +possession of another, as Joshua's solar miracle. I was called, led +along a silent corridor full of shut doors, and after a long walk found +myself beyond all the noise of London, far in solitude with a man in a +dressing-gown, who stood before a fire, working a cigar with strong, +mobile lips. He put up a monocle, and looked at me shyly. Then began to +walk up and down the hearth-rug, talking. + +"'Well,' he said. 'All right. I guess you'll do. Say, you look pretty +fit. You don't drink, eh? Don't get nervous when you see the dead, huh? +All right.' He put his monocle back into his eye, and grinned at me. I +told him, in a rush, how much I wanted to see the tropics. He said +nothing. He got a large blue map, intricate with white lines, and told +me of The Company. The Job. + +"I did not fully comprehend it then. I don't now. He left out too much. +There was no beginning and no ending. There was hardly a middle. He +merely indicated unrelated points; but at any rate the points were so +widely sundered and so different that the bare indication of them +conveyed a sense of an enormous undertaking, difficult, important, and +necessary. Work for an army. I should be but an insignificant sutler in +that army. But at least I should be one in it, one of those putting this +important affair through for future generations. The communal idea, +this. The very size of it gave me a sense of security. It was too +broad-based to collapse. Success was inherent in its impersonal nature. +A state affair. Brewster briefly mentioned some showy names, names of +great financiers. They were my generals, and I should never see them. +But their reputations were partly in my keeping. + +"Hallelujah! I had escaped. I never went back to the office. I never +replied to its curt inquiry. In a week I sailed from Liverpool. Much I +heard, on the mail boat, of The Company, this new enterprise which was +going to make a tropical region one of the richest countries in the +world; develop it, fling its riches to all. In four weeks more I arrived +at a small tropical island, at which I had to wait for The Company's tug +to take me to the mainland and my business. + +"There was a club-house ashore, where I stayed for a few days. There I +met some men who had been working for The Company, but for +incomprehensible reasons were leaving this work to which I had come so +eagerly; they were returning home. They were strangely pallid and limp +as though the dark of some hot damp underground had turned their blood +white. Their talk was drawled out, the weary utterance of the +disillusioned who yet showed fate no resentment. They might have been +the dead speaking, long untouched by any warm human vanity. I was really +glad to get away from them. A tug conveyed me to the mouth of the river, +up which I was to proceed to my station. I joined a shallow-draught +river steamer. + +"The river, that gateway to my dream come true, was a narrow place, a +cleft in universal trees, every tree the same. Mangroves, I suppose. +Soon the forest changed, often rising on each bank to meet overhead. +Those were uncertain places of leaves and dead timber, and as quiet and +still as churchyard yews at midnight. The thumps of our paddle-wheels +did not sound pleasant. Deeper and deeper we went, making turns so often +that I wondered how we could ever be got out again. Sometimes in an open +space we saw a flock of birds. I saw no other sign of life. There were +no men. All my fellow-passengers--there were ten of us--were newcomers; +some from the States, some from Germany, and a Frenchman. I was the only +Englishman. Each of us knew what was expected of himself; none of us +knew what that was which all would be doing. There were clerks with us, +miners, civil engineers, timber men, and a metallurgist. We speculated +much, were perhaps a trifle anxious, but reposed generally on the great +idea. + +"In two hundred miles we reached a clearing. Why it should have been at +that particular place did not show. But there it was, the tangible link +in an invisible, encompassing scheme. It was my place. I landed with my +box. There was a white man on the river bank, sitting on a sea-chest, +his head in his hands. He looked up. 'You the victim?' he said. 'Well, +there you are'--sweeping a lazy arm round the small enclosed +ground--'that's your job. There's your store. There's your house. That's +where the niggers live.' + +"'Pedro!' he called. A copper-coloured native, in shorts and a wide +grass hat, loafed over to us. 'This is your servant,' he said. 'He's a +bit mad, but he's not a fool. He's all right. Keep your eye on the +niggers though. They are fools, and they're not mad. You'll find the +inventory and the accounts in the desk in your hut. The quinine's there +too. Take these keys. Oh, the mosquito curtain's got holes in it. See +you mend it. I couldn't. Had the shakes too bad. Cheer up!' + +"He went aboard. The steamer saluted me with its whistle, turned a +corner, and the sound of its paddles diminished, died. I seemed to +concentrate, as though I had never known myself till that instant when +the sound of the steamer failed, when the last connection with busy +outer life was gone. I could smell something like stephanotis. In that +dead silence my hearing was so acute that I caught a faint rustling, +which I thought might be the sound of things growing. I turned and went +to my hut, sad Pedro following with my box. The cheap American clock in +the hut made a terrific noise, filling the afternoon with its rapid and +ridiculous beat, trying to recall to me that time still was moving +quickly, when it was quite evident that time had now come for me to an +absolute stand in a broad-glowing noon. I sat surveying things from a +chair. Then leisurely took my envelope and read my instructions--how I +was to receive and take charge of shovels, lanterns, machinery parts, +railway metals, soap, cooking utensils, axes, pumps, and so on, which +consignments I must divide and parcel according to directions to come, +marking each consignment for its own destination. The names of a hundred +destinations I should hear about in my future work were given. They were +names meaning nothing to me. Then followed some brief rules for a novice +in the governing of men. Through all the rules ran an incongruous note +for such a place as that, a reminiscence of Leadenhall Street and its +miserable whine. Yet it hardly disturbed me. I sat and thought over this +expansion of my life. A melancholy bird called in two notes at +intervals. The leaves which formed the thatch of my hut hung a long +coarse black fringe at the door. My walls were of leaves, and the floor +a raft of small logs, still with the bark on, just clear of the ground. +The sunlight came through one dark wall, studding it with sparks. No. +That dubious and familiar note in the instructions was nothing. I was +clear beyond all that now--all those occasions for carking anxiety which +deprave the worker, and make him hate the task to which whipping +necessity drives him. The domineering manner of my instructions, the +fretfulness of the old correspondence I found carelessly scattered +about, addressed to my predecessor, was the illusion. The forest behind +the hut, the black river, the quiet, the insects, the foreign smell, the +puzzling men, my men to command, who kept passing without in the violent +light, they were not from books any more, they made evidence direct to +my own senses now. I was authority and providence, moulding and +protecting as I thought right. This place should be kept reasonable, +four square, my plot of earth to be clean and unashamed, frankly open to +the eye of the sky. I would see what I could do; and I would start now. +I laughed at authority--all I could see of it--reflected in a fragment +of mirror kept to a door tree by nail heads; the funny hat and the shirt +which did not matter, bad as it was, for I was authority there by every +reason of that white shirt; and the beard which was coming. Latitude, my +boy, latitude! I strolled out to survey my little world. + +"Of the weeks that followed, nothing comes back so strongly as some +quite irrelevant incidents. A tiger I saw one morning, swimming the +river. Pedro, insensible for two days with fever; and death, which came +to over-rule my viceroy authority. The first blow! There was a flock of +parrots which visited us one day, and it surprised me that the men +should regard them merely as food. But there was work to be done, and in +a definite way; but why we did it--and I know we did it well--and how it +joined up with the Job, I could not see. That was not my affair. There +was the inventory to be checked, for one thing, and before I was through +with it the work had fairly imprisoned me, and the new romantic +circumstances became blurred and over written. That inventory was so +extravagantly wrong that in a week I was going about heated and swearing +at the least provocation. It was fraudulent. There was a sporadic +disorder of goods irreconcilable with their neat records, though each +record bore the signs and counter-signs of Heaven knows how many +departments of the Company. All an inextricable welter of calm errors, +neatly initialled by unknown fools. + +"Every few days a steamer of the Company would call, loaded with more +goods, or would come down river to me to take goods away. The confusion +grew and interpenetrated, till I felt that nothing but dumping all that +was there into the river, and beginning again with a virgin station, +would ever clear the muddle. The place grew maddening through ridiculous +blundering from outside. I had six men to attend to, all with +temperatures and all useless. The arrears of accounts, my work on +sweltering nights while the very niggers slept, the arrears grew. A +steam-shovel came, without its shovel, and not all my written protests +to headquarters could complete that irrational creature lying in +sections rotting in sun and rain, minus the very reason for its +existence, an impediment to us and an irritation. Constant urgent orders +came to me from up country to ship there this abortion. I declined, in +the name of sanity. There followed peremptory demands for a complete +steam-shovel, violent with animosity for me, the unknown idiot who +obstinately refused to let a steam-shovel go, just as though I was in +love with the damned thing, and could not part with it. But I understood +those letters. They were from chaps, irritated, like myself, by all this +awful tomfoolery. And from headquarters came other letters, shot with a +curt note of innocent insolence, asking whether I was asleep there, or +dead, and adding, once, that if I could not keep up communications +better I had better make way for one who could. There were plenty who +could do it. Pleasant, wasn't it? They complained querulously of my +accounts, almost insinuating that I debited more wages to the Company +than I credited to the men. I had too many sick men, they said. Did I +pamper them? And again, I had too many who died; I must take care; they +did not want the local government to get alarmed. + +"The time came when I got amusement out of those letters from +headquarters; for their faults were so plain that I conceived the +headquarters staff having much time to spend, and a sort of instruction +at large to administer ginger to men, like myself, on the spot, on +general principles, so to keep us not only alive, but brisk and anxious; +and doing it with the inconsequential abandon of little children playing +with sharp knives. I got comfort from that view; and when I looked round +my placid domain where my men, with whom I was on good terms, laboured +easily and rightly under the still woods, I told myself I was still +fretting because the business was new, that things would come easier +soon. But at night I felt I was anxious exactly because it was all so +old and familiar to me. + +"One day, having given a group of men at work in a distant corner of the +clearing some advice, I noticed a little path enter the wood beside a +big tree. I had never been into the forest. To tell the truth, I had had +no time. The trees stood round us, keeping us from--what? I had always +felt a little doubt of what was there and could not be seen. I turned +inwards. I found myself at once in a cool gloom. I went on curiously, +peering each side into those shadows, where nothing moved, and in an +hour came to another clearing, smaller than my own, and with no river in +view. By the sun, which now I saw again, this place was north of our +station. The opening was being rapidly choked by a new growth. I was +turning for home again, for the afternoon was late, when I saw a hammock +slung between two saplings beside a dismantled hut. I could just see the +hammock and hut through the scrub. I went over there, and was so +carefully looking for snakes and beastly things in the bush that I had +arrived before I knew it. The hut had been long abandoned. The hammock +had something in it, and I was turning something in my mind as I went up +to it. There were some ragged clothes in the bottom of it, partly +covering bones, and among the rags was a globe of black hair. + +"Next morning I woke late, feeling I had gone wrong. My hands were +yellow and my finger nails blue, and I was shaking with cold. But the +tootling of an up-coming steamer forced me to business. The steamer was +towing six lighters, filled with labourers. They were Poles, I think. +Afterwards, I learned, some hundreds of these men had been collected for +us somewhere by a clever, business-like recruiting agent, who promised +each poor wretch a profitable time in the Garden of Eden. My +responsibility, thirty of them, was landed. They stood by the river, +gaping about them, wondering, some alarmed, more of them angry, most +clad in stuffy woollens, poor souls. Having the fever, I was not very +interested. I told my negro foreman to find them shelter and to put them +to work. We were making our clearing larger, and were building more +store-houses. + +"Something like the pale morning light which wakens you, weary from a +fitful sleep, to the clear apprehension again of an urgent trouble which +has filled the night with dreams, I came through each bout of fever to +know there was really trouble outside with the new men. Daily I had to +crawl about, shivering, my head dizzy with quinine, till the fever came +near its height, when I got into my hammock, and would lie there, +waiting, burning and dry, tremulous with an anxiety I could not shape. +Sometimes then I saw my big negro foreman come to the door, look at me, +as though wishing to say something, but leave, reluctantly, when I +motioned him away. + +"One morning I was better, but hardly able to walk, when shouts and a +running fight, which I could see through the door, showed me the Poles +had mutinied. There was a hustling gang of them outside my door, filling +it with haggard, furious faces. I could not understand them, but one +presently began to shout in French. They refused to work. The food was +bad. They wanted meat. They wanted their contracts fulfilled. They +wanted bread, clothes, money, passages out of the country. They had been +fooled and swindled. They were dying. I argued plaintively with that +man, but it made him shout and gesticulate. At that the voices of all +rose in a passionate tumult, knives and axes flourishing in the +sunlight. In a sudden cold ferocity, not knowing what I was doing, I +picked up my empty gun--I had no ammunition--and moved down on them. +They held for a moment, then broke ground, and walked away quickly, +looking back with fear and malice. Next day they had gone. Yes, +actually. The poor devils. They had gone, with the exception of a few +with the fever. They had taken to that darkness around us, to find a way +to the coast. Talk of the babes in the wood! The men had no food, no +guide, and had they known the right direction they could not have +followed it. If the Company did not take you out of that land, you +stayed there; and if the Company did not feed you there, you died. No +creature could leave that clearing, and survive, unless I willed it. The +forest and the river kept my men together as effectively as though they +were marooned without a boat on a deep-sea island. Those men were never +heard of again. Nobody was to blame. Whom could you blame? The Company +did not desire their death. Simply, not knowing what they were doing, +those poor fellows walked into the invisibly moving machinery of the +Job, not knowing it was there, and were mutilated. + +"We had news of the same trouble with the Poles up river. Some of the +mutineers tried to get to the sea on rafts. Such amazing courage was but +desperation and a complete ignorance of the place they were in. One such +raft did pass our place. Some of them were prone on it, others +squatting; one man got on his feet as the raft swung by our clearing, +and emptied his revolver into us. A few days later another raft floated +by, close in, with six men lying upon it. They were headless. Somewhere, +the savages had caught them asleep. + +"No. I was not affected as much as you might think. I began to look upon +it all with insensitive serenity. I was getting like the men I met on +the islands, months before. I saw us all caught by something huge and +hungry, a viewless, impartial appetite which swallowed us all without +examination; which was slowly eating me. I began to feel I should never +leave that place, and did not care. Why should others want to leave it, +then? Often, through weakness, the trees around us seemed to me to sway, +to be veiled in a thin mist. The heat did not weigh on my skin, but on +my dry bones. I was parched body and mind, and when the men came with +their grievances I felt I could shoot any of them, for very weariness, +to escape argument. The insolence from headquarters I filed for +reference no longer, but lit my pipe with it. But the correspondence +ceased at length, and because now I was callous to it, I failed to +notice it had stopped. + +"Some vessels passed down river, coming suddenly to view, a rush of +paddles, and were gone, tootling their whistles. The work went on, +mechanically. The clearing grew. The sheds spread one by one. The +inventory was kept, the accounts were dealt with. There came a time when +I was forced to remember that the steamer had not called for ten days. +We were running short of food. I had a number of sick, but no quinine. +The men, those quick, faithful fellows with the dog-like, patient eyes, +they looked to me, and I was going to fail them. I made pills of flour +to look like quinine, for the fever patients, trying to cure them by +faith. I wrote a report to headquarters, which I knew would get me my +discharge; I was not polite. There was no meat. We tried dough fried in +lard. When I think of the dumb patience of those black fellows in their +endurance for an idea of which they knew nothing, I am amazed at the +docility and kindness inherent in common men. They will give their lives +for nothing, if you don't tell them to do it, but only let them trust +you to take them to the sacrifice they know nothing about. + +"That went on for a month. We were in rags. We were starved. We were +scarecrows. No steamer had been by the place, from either direction, for +a month. Then a vessel came. I did not know the chap in charge. He +seemed surprised to see us there. He opened his eyes at our gaunt crew +of survivors, shocked. Then he spoke. + +"'Don't you know?' he asked. + +"Even that ridiculous question had no effect on me. I merely eyed him. I +was reduced to an impotent, dumb query. I suppose I was like Jack the +foreman, a gaping, silent, pathetic interrogation. At last I spoke, and +my voice sounded miles away. 'Well, what do you want here?' + +"'I've come for that steam shovel. I've bought it.' + +"The man was mad. My sick men wanted physic. We all wanted food. But +this stranger had come to us just to take away our useless steam shovel. +'I thought you knew,' he said. 'The Company's bought out. Some +syndicate's bought 'em out. A month ago. Thought the Company would be +too successful. Spoil some other place. There's no Company now. They're +selling off. What about that steam shovel?'" + + + + +V + + +We had 5200 tons of cargo, and nearly all of it was patent fuel. This +was to be put into baskets, hauled up, and emptied into railway trucks +run out on the jetty alongside. We watched the men at work for a few +days and nights, and judged we should be at Porto Velho for a month. I +saw for myself long rambles in the forest during that time of golden +leisure, but saw them no more after the first attempt. The clearing on +its north side rose steeply to about a hundred feet on the hard red +conglomerate; to the south, on the San Antonio side, it ended in a creek +and a swamp. But at whatever point the Doctor and I attempted to leave +the clearing we soon found ourselves stopped by a dense undergrowth. At +a few places there were narrow footpaths, subterranean in the quality of +their light, made by timbermen when searching for suitable trees for the +saw-mill. These tracks never penetrated more than a few hundred yards, +and always ended in a well of sunshine in the forest where some big +trees would be prone in a tangle of splintered branches, and a deep +litter of leaves and broken fronds. And that was as far as man had got +inwards from the east bank of the Madeira river. Beyond it was the +undiscovered, and the Araras Indians. On the other side of the river the +difficulty was the same. The Rio Purus, the next tributary of the Amazon +westward from the Madeira, had its course, it was guessed, perhaps not +more than fifty miles across country from the river bank opposite Porto +Velho; but no one yet has made a traverse of the land between the two +streams. The dark secrecy of the region was even oppressive. Sometimes +when venturing alone a little beyond a footpath, out of hearing of the +settlement, surrounded by the dim tangle in which there was not a +movement or a sound, I have become suspicious that the shapes about me +in the half light were all that was real there, and Porto Velho and its +men an illusion, and there has been a touch of panic in my haste to find +the trail again, and to prove that it could take me to an open prospect +of sunny things with the solid "Capella" in their midst. + +We carried our butterfly nets ashore and went of a morning across the +settlement, choosing one of the paths which ended in a small forest +opening, where there was sunlight as well as shadow. Few butterflies +came to such places. You could really think the forest was untenanted. A +tanager would dart a ray of metallic sheen in the wreckage of timber and +dead branches about us, or some creature would call briefly, melancholy +wise, in the woods. Very rarely an animal would go with an explosive +rush through the leaves. But movements and sounds, except the sound of +our own voices, were surprises; and a sight of one of the larger +inhabitants of the jungle is such a rarity that we knew we might be +there for years and never get it. Yet life about its various business in +the woods kept us interested till the declining sun said it was time to +get aboard again. Every foot of earth, the rotting wood, the bark of the +standing trees, every pool, and the litter of dead leaves and husks, +were populous when closely regarded. Most of the trees had smooth barks. +A corrugated trunk, like that of our elm, was exceptional. But when a +bole had a rough surface it would be masked by the grey tenacious +webbing of spiders; on one such tree we found a small mantis, which so +mimicked the spiders that we were long in discovering what it really +was. Many of the smooth tree trunks were striated laterally with lines +of dry mud. These lines were actually tunnels, covered ways for certain +ants. The corridors of this limitless mansion had many such surprises. +There were the sauba ants; they might engross all a man's hours, for in +watching them he could easily forget there were other things in the +world. They would move over the ground in an interminable procession. +Looked at quickly, that column of fluid life seemed a narrow brook, its +surface smothered with green leaves, which it carried, not round or +under obstructions, but upwards and over them. Nearly every tiny +creature in that stream of life held upright in its jaws a banner, much +larger than itself, cut from a fresh leaf. It bore its banner along +hurriedly and resolutely. All the ants carrying leaves moved in one +direction. The flickering and forward movement of so many leaves gave +the procession of ants the wavering appearance of shallow water running +unevenly. On both sides of the column other ants hurried in the reverse +direction, often stopping to communicate something, with their antennae, +to their burdened fellows. Two ants would stop momentarily, and there +would be a swift intimation, and then away they would go again on their +urgent affairs. We would see rapid conversations of that kind everywhere +in the host. Other ants, with larger heads, kept moving hither and +thither about the main body; having an eye on matters generally, I +suppose, policing or superintending them. There was no doubt all those +little fellows had a common purpose. There was no doubt they had made up +their minds about it long since, had come to a decision communally, and +that each of them knew his job and meant to get it done. There did not +appear to be any ant favoured by the god of the ants. You have to cut +your own leaf and get along with it, if you are a sauba. + +There they were, flowing at our feet. I see it now, one of those +restricted forest openings to which we often went, the wall of the +jungle all round, and some small attalea palms left standing, the green +of their long plumes as hard and bright as though varnished. Nothing +else is there that is green, except the weeds which came when the +sunlight was let in by the axe. The spindly forest columns rise about, +pallid in a wall of gloom, draped with withered stuff and dead cordage. +Their far foliage is black and undistinguishable against the irregular +patch of overhead blue. It never ceased to be remarkable that so little +that was green was there. The few pothos plants, their shapely parasitic +foliage sitting like decorative nests in some boughs half-way to the +sky, would be strangely conspicuous and bright. The only leaves of the +forest near us were on the ground, brown parchments all of one simple +shape, that of the leaf of the laurel. I remember a stagnant pool there, +and over it suspended some enamelled dragonflies, their wings vibrating +so rapidly that the flies were like rubies shining in obscure nebulae. +When we moved, the nymphs vanished, just as if a light flashed out. We +sat down again on our felled tree to watch, and magically they +reappeared in the same place, as though their apparition depended on the +angle and distance of the eye. When a bird called one started +involuntarily, for the air was so muffled and heavy that it was strange +to find it open instantly to let free the delicate sibilation. + +In the low ground beyond Porto Velho up stream there was another place +in the forest where sometimes we would go, the approach to it being +through a deep cutting made by the railwaymen in the clay. This clay, a +stiff homogeneous mass mottled rose and white, was saturated with +moisture, and the helicon butterflies frequented it, probably because it +was damp; and a sight of their black and yellow, or black and crimson +wings, spread on the clean plane of the beautifully tinted rock, was far +better than putting them in the collecting box. The helicons are bold +insects, and did not seem to mind our close inspecting eyes. Beyond the +cutting was a long narrow clearing, with a giant silk cotton tree, a +province in itself, on the edge of the forest. Looking straight upward +we could see its foliage, but so far away was the spreading canopy of +leaves that it was only a black cloud, the outermost sprays mere wisps +of dark vapour melting in the intense brightness of the sky. The smooth +grey trunk was heavily buttressed, the "sapeomas" (literally, flat +roots) ascending the bole for more than fifty feet, and radiating in +walls about the base of the tree; the compartments were so large that +they could have been used as stabling for four or five horses. From its +upper limbs a wreckage of lianas hung to the ground. Beyond this giant +the path rose to a place where the clearing was already waist high with +scrub. Then it descended again to the woods. But the woods there were +flooded. That was my first near view of the igapo. We had approached the +trees, for they seemed free of the usual undergrowth, and passed into +the sombre colonnades. The way appeared clear enough, and we thought we +could move ahead freely at last, but found in a few steps the bare floor +was really black water. The base of the forest was submerged, the +columns which supported the unseen roof, through which came little +light, diminished down soundless distance into night. After the flaming +day from which we had just come this darkness was repellant. The forest, +that austere, stately and regarding Presence draped interminably in +verdant folds, while we gazed upon it suspecting no new thing of it, as +by a stealthy movement had withdrawn its green robe, and our sight had +fallen into the cavernous gloom of its dank and hollow heart. + +It was about the little wooden town itself, where the scarified earth +was already sparsely mantled with shrubs, flowering vines, and weeds, +and where the burnt tree stumps, and even the door posts in some cases, +were freshly budding--life insurgent, beaten down by fire and sword, but +never to its source and copious springs--that most of the butterflies +were to be found. In a land where blossoms were few, these were the +winged flowers. About the squalid wooden barracks of the negro and +native labourers, which were built off the ground to allow of +ventilation, and had a trench round them foul with drainage and evil +with smells, a Col[oe]nis, a scarlet butterfly with narrow, swallow-like +wings, used to flash, and frequently would settle there. Over the +flowering weeds on the waste ground there would be, in the morning +hours, or when the sky was overcast, glittering clouds of the smaller +and duller species, though among them now and then would stoop a very +emperor of butterflies, a being quick and unbelievably beautiful to +temperate eyes. After midday, when the sun was intense, the butterflies +became scarce. When out of the shade of the woods, and stranded, at that +time, in the hopeless heat of the bare settlement, we could turn into +one of the houses of the officials of the company for shelter. These +also were of timber, cool, with a verandah that was a cage of fine +copper gauze to keep out the insects. All the doors were self-closing. +The fewest chances were offered to the mosquitoes. There was no glass, +for the window openings also were covered with copper mesh. Here we +could sit in shaded security, in lazy chairs, and look out over the +clearing to the river below, and to the level line of forest across the +river, while listening to stories which had come down to Porto Velho +from the interior, brought by the returning pioneers. + +Porto Velho had a population of about three hundred. There were +Americans, Germans, English, Brazilians, a few Frenchmen, Portuguese, +some Spaniards, and a crowd of negroes and negresses. There was but one +white woman in the settlement. I was told the climate seemed to poison +them. The white girl, who persisted in staying in spite of warnings from +the doctors, was herself a Brazilian, the wife of one of the labourers. +She refused to leave, and sometimes I saw her about, petite, frail, +looking very sad. But her husband was earning good money. It was a busy +place, most of it being workshops, stores, and offices, with an engine +and trucks jangling inconsequentially on the track by the shore. The +line crossed a creek by a trestle bridge, and disappeared in the forest +in the direction of San Antonio. The hospital for the men was nearly two +miles up the track. + +It was along the railway track towards the hospital, with the woods to +the left, and a short margin of scrub and forest, and then the river, on +the right hand, that I saw one morning in sauntering a few miles as many +butterflies as there are flowers in an English garden in June. They were +the blossoms of the place. The track was bright with them. They settled +on the hot metals and ties, clustered thickly round muddy pools, a +plantation there as vivid and alive, in the quick movements of their +wings, as though a wind shook the petals of a bed of flowers. They +flashed by like birds. One would soar slowly, wings outspread and +stable, a living plane of metallic green and black. There was a large +and insolent beauty--he did not move from his drink at a puddle though +my boot almost touched him--his wings a velvety black with crimson eyes +on the underwings, and I caught him; but I was so astonished by the +strength of his convulsive body in the net that I let him go. Near the +hospital some bushes were covered with minute flowers, and seen from a +distance the countless insects moving about those bushes were a +glistening and puzzling haze. + +All that morning I had felt the power of the torrid sun, which clung to +the body like invisible bonds, and made one's movements slow, was a +luscious benefit, a golden bath, a softening and generative balm; a +mother heat and light whose ardent virtues stained pinions crimson and +cobalt, and made bodies strong and convulsive, and caused the earth to +burst with rushing sap, to send up green fountains; for so the palms, +which showed everywhere in the woods, looked to me. You could hear the +incessant low murmur of multitudinous wings. And I had been warned to +beware of all things. I felt instead that I could live and grow for ever +in such a land. + +Presently, becoming a little weary of so much strong light, I found it +was midday, and looking back, there was the ship across a curve of the +river. It was two good miles away; two intense, shadeless, silent +afternoon miles. I began the return journey. An increasing rumbling +sound ahead made me look up, as I stepped from tie to tie, and there +came at me a trolley car, pumped along slowly, four brown bodies rising +and falling rhythmically over its handle. A man in a white suit was its +passenger. As it passed me I saw it bore also something under a white +cloth; the cloth moulded a childish figure, of which only the hem of a +skirt and the neat little booted feet showed beyond the cloth, and the +feet swayed limply with the jolts of the car in a way curiously +appealing and woful. The car stopped, and the white man, a cheerful +young doctor chewing an extinct cigar, came to me for a light. He stood +to gossip for a few minutes, giving his men a rest. "That's the +Brazilian girl," he said; "she wouldn't go home when told, poor thing." + + * * * * * + +This Madeira river had the look of very adventurous fishing, and the +Doctor had brought with him an assortment of tackle. The water was +opaque, and it was deep. Its prospects, though the forest closed round +us, were spacious. It flowed silently, with great power, and its surface +was often coiled by profound movements. The coils of the river, as we +were looking over the side one morning, began to move in our minds also, +and the Doctor mentioned his tackle. There was the forest enclosing us, +as mute as the water, its bare roots clenched in aqueous earth. Nobody +could tell us much about the fish in this river, but we heard stories of +creatures partly seen. There was one story of a thing taken from the +very place in the river where we were anchored, a fish in armour which +the natives declared was new to them; a fearful ganoid I guessed it, +reconstructing it in vision from fragments of various tales about it, +such as is pictured in a book on primeval rocks. There were alligators, +too, and there was the sucuruju, which I could call the great water +serpent, only the Indian name sounds so much more right and awful; and +that fellow is forty feet long in his legend, but spoils a good story +through reducing himself by half when he is actually killed. Still, +twenty feet of stout snake is enough for trouble. I saw one, just after +it was killed, which was twenty-two feet in length, and was three feet +round its middle. So to fish in the Madeira was as if one's hook and +line were cast into the deeps where forms that are without name stir in +the dark of dreams. We got out our tackle, and the cook had an +assortment of stuff he did not want, and that we put on the hooks, and +waited, our lines carried astern by the current, for signals from the +unknown. Yet excepting for a few catfish, nothing interrupted the placid +flow of stream and time. The Doctor put a bight of the lime round his +wrist, sat down, and slept. We had fine afternoons, broad with the +wealth of our own time. + +Old man Jim came aboard and saw our patience with amusement. He +suggested dynamite, and no waiting. The river was full of good fish, and +he would come next day with a canoe and take us where we could get a +load. It was a suggestion which needed slurring, to look attractive to +sportsmen. Jim took it for granted that we simply wanted fish to eat, +and as many as we could get; and next morning there he was alongside +with his big boat and its crew. Jim himself was in the stern, the +navigator, and he was sitting on what I was told was a box of dynamite. +Now, there were two others of our company who, but the day before, were +even eager to see what dynamite would send up from the bottom of that +river; but when they saw the craft alongside with its wild-looking crew, +and Jim with his rifle sitting on a power which could lift St. Paul's, +they considered everything, and decided they could not go that day. I +went alone. + +I suppose men do plucky things because they are largely thoughtless of +the danger of the things they do. As soon as I was sitting on the level +of the water in that crazy boat, with Jim and his explosive, and beside +him what whisky he had not already consumed, and saw under my nose the +eddies and upheavals of the current, I knew I was doing a very plucky +thing indeed, and wished I was high and safe on the "Capella." But we +had pushed off. + +Jim, with his eyes dreamy through barley juice, was the pilot, and there +was a measure of confidence to be got from the way he navigated us past +the charging trees afloat. There was no drink in the steering paddle, at +least. But the shore was a long swim away; yet perhaps it would have +been as pleasant to be drowned or blown-up as to be lost in the jungle. +We turned into a still creek, where the trees met overhead. Jim +continued his course till the inundated forest was about us. The gloom +was hollow, the pillars rising from the black floor were spectral, and +our voices and paddles sounded like a noisy irruption among the aisles +of a temple. The echoes fled from us deeper into the dark. But Jim was +all unconscious of this; he but stopped our progress, and opened the box +of cartridges. + +I had never seen dynamite, but only heard of it. I understood it had +unexpected qualities. Jim had a cartridge in his hand, and was digging a +knife into it. I repeat, the flooded wilderness was round us, and below +was the black deep. Jim fitted a detonator to a length of fuse, and +stuck it in the cartridge. He was in no hurry. He stopped now and then +for another drink. Having got the cartridge ready, with its potent +filament, he tied four more cartridges round it. I put these things down +simply, but my hand ached with the way I gripped the gunwale, and I +could hear myself breathing. + +Then Jim struck a match on his breeches, with all the fumbling +deliberation of the fully ripe--brushing the vine leaves from his eyes +the better to see what he was doing--and he lit the fuse, after it had +twice dodged the match. It fizzed. The splutter worked downwards +energetically. Jim did not deign to look at it, though it fascinated me. +He slowly scratched his back with his disengaged hand, and gazed +absently into the forest. + +The spark and its spurts of smoke were now near the bottom. Jim changed +the menace into his right hand, in order to reach another part of his +back with his leisurely left. His eyes were still on the forest. I kept +swallowing. + +"Jim," I said eagerly--though I did not know I was going to +speak--"don't--don't you think you'd better throw it away now?" + +He regarded me steadily, with eyes half shut. The spark spurted, and +dropped another inch. He looked at it. He looked round the waters +without haste. Then, and I could have cried aloud, he threw the shocking +handful away from us. + +It sank. There were a few bubbles, and we sat regarding each other in +the quiet of a time which had been long dead, waiting for something to +happen in a time to come. At the end of two weeks the bottom of the +river fell out, with the noise of the collapse of an iron foundry on a +Sunday. Our boat tried to leap upwards, but failed. The water did not +burst asunder. It vibrated, and was then convulsed. + +Dead fish appeared everywhere, patches of white all round; but we hardly +saw them. There was a great head which emerged from the floor, looking +upwards sleepily, and two hands moved slowly. These quietly sank again. +The tail of the saurean appeared, slowly described a half circle, and +went. The big alligator then lifted itself, and performed some grotesque +antics with deliberation and gravity. Then it gathered speed. It +rotated, thrashed, and drummed. It did all that a ten-horse-power maniac +might. I think the natives shrieked. I think Jim kept saying "hell"; for +I was conscious only with my eyes. When the dizzy reptile recovered, it +shot away among the trees like a torpedo. + +We went home. That night I understand the second mate was kept awake +listening to me, as I slept, bursting into spasms of dreadful merriment. + + * * * * * + +When you are lost in the map of a country that is beyond the worn +routes, trying to discover therein the place name which is the most +secluded and inaccessible, if the map should happen to be that of South +America, then your thought would naturally wander to the neighbourhood +of San Antonio of the Rio Madeira. There you stay, to wonder what +strange people and rocks and trees are to be found at San Antonio. It +looks remote, even on the map. The sign which stands for the village is +caught in a central loop of the mesh which is the river system of the +Amazon forest. San Antonio must be beyond all, and a great journey. It +is far outside the radius. And that would be enough, to be beyond the +last ripple of the traffic and at peace, where that dark disquiet, that +sombre emanation which rises from the soured earth where myriads have +their chimneys, their troubles and their strife, staining even the +morning and the morning thought, is no more. A place where the light has +the clarity of the first dawn, and one might hear, while sure of +absolute solitude, the winding of a strange horn, and suspect, when +coming to an opening in the woods, the flight of a shining one; for +somewhere the ancient gods must have sanctuary. A land where the rocks +have the moss of unvisited fastnesses, and you can snuff the scents of +original day. + +Where we were anchored, San Antonio was in view, about five miles up +stream. Where at the end of that reach of river a line of tremulous +light, which we thought was the cataracts, bridged the converging +palisades of the jungle, in the trees of the right bank it was sometimes +easy to believe there was a glint of white buildings. But looking again, +to reassure your sight, the apparition of dwellings vanished. At night, +in the quiet, sometimes the ears could detect the shudder of the weighty +rapids by San Antonio; but it was merely a tremor felt; there was no +sound. The village remained to us for some time just that uncertain +gleam by day, and the rapids but a minute reduction of a turmoil that +was far. For in that languorous heat we counted miles differently, and +it was pleasanter to suspect than to go and prove, and much easier. + +One day I went. When in a small boat the jungle towered. The river, too, +had a different character. From the shore, or from the big "Capella," +the river was an expanse of light, an impression of shining peace. +Whenever you got close to its surface it became alive and menacingly +intimate. Our little boat seemed to roll in the powerful folds of a +monster which wallowed ponderously and without ceasing. The trees +afloat, charging down swiftly and in what one felt was an ominous quiet, +stood well above our tiny craft. + +We steered close in-shore to avoid the drifting wood and the set of the +current. The jungle's sheer height, confusion, and intensity were more +awesome than when seen from the steamer. Not many of the trees were of +great beam, but their consistent height, with the lianas in a wreck from +the far overhanging cornice, dwarfed our boat to an unimportant straw. +At times the forest had a selvage of cane, and growths of arrow grass, +bearing long white plumes twelve feet above us, and a pair of fan-shaped +leaves resembling palm leaves. + +The sound of the cataracts increased, and a barrier grew in height +athwart the Madeira. Mounting high right ahead of us at last was a mass +of granite boulders, with broad smooth surfaces, having the structure of +gigantic masonry in ruin which weathered plutonic rock so often assumes. +Beyond the barrier the river was plainly above our level. It was seen, +resplendent as quicksilver, through the crenellations of the black +rocks. One central mass of rock, higher than the rest, had a crown of +dark and individual palms, standing paramount in the upper light. Yet, +with that gleam of wide river behind, no great rush of water broke +there. A few fountains spurted, apparently without source, and +collapsed, and pulsed again. The white runnels of foam which laced the +contours of the piled boulders gave the barrier the appearance of being +miraculously uplifted, as though one saw thin daylight through its +interstices. Not till the village was in view did we see where the main +river avoided the barrier. The course here was looped. Above the barrier +the river turned from the right bank, and heaped itself in a smooth +steep glide through a narrow pass against the opposite shore, the +roaring welter then running obliquely across the foot of the rocks to +the front of San Antonio on the right bank again. The forest beside the +falls seemed to be tremulous with continuous and profound underground +thunder. + +The little huddle of San Antonio's white houses is on slightly rising +ground, and the lambent green of the jungle is beside them and over +them. The foliage presses the village down to the river. Like every +Amazonian town and village, it appears, set in that forest, as rare a +human foothold as a ship in mid-ocean; a few lights and a few voices in +the dark and interminable wastes. So I landed from our little craft +elated with a sense of luckily acquired security. + +The white embowered village, the leaping fountains and the rocks, the +air in a flutter with the shock of ponderous water collapsing, the +surmounting island in mid-stream with its coronet of palms, the +half-naked Indians idling among the Bolivian rubber boats hauled up to +the foreshore below, the unexplored jungle which closed in and framed +the scene, the fierce sun set in the rounded amplitude of the clouds of +the rains, made the tropical picture which was the right reward for a +great journey. I had come down long weeks of empty leisure, in which the +mind got farther and farther away from the cities where time is so +carefully measured and highly valued. The centre of the ultimate +wilderness was more than a matter of fact. It was now a personal +conviction which needed no verification. + +The village had but one street. There were two rows of houses of a +single storey, built of clay and plaster, dilapidated, the whitewash +stained and peeling, every house open and cavernous below, without +doors, in the way of Brazilian dwellings, to give coolness. The street +was almost deserted when we entered it. A few children played in the +shadows, and outside one house a merchant in a white cotton suit stood +overlooking the scales while the half-breeds weighed balls of rubber; +for this town is in the midst of the richest rubber country of the +world, and all the wealth of the rivers Mamore, Beni, and Madre de Dios +comes this way. And that was why, as we idled through its single +thoroughfare, some dark girls came to stand at the house openings, +dressed in odorous muslin, red flowers in their shiny black hair, and +their smiling eyes full of interest in us. The rough road between the +dwellings was overgrown with grass, and in the centre of it, partly +hidden by the grass, was the line laid long ago by the railway +enterprise which ended so tragically. To-day the rubber men use it as a +portage for their boats. There were several inns, half-obliterated names +painted on their outer walls. They had crude interior walls of mud, and +floors of bare earth. In such an inn would be a few iron tables and +chairs, and there a visitor might drink from bottles which at least bore +European labels, though the contents and cost were past all European +understanding. I forgot to say that by the foreshore of this little +village is the head depot of a great rubber house, a building apparently +out of all proportion to the size of San Antonio. But I looked on that +place with the less interest, though from what my native companion told +me the head of the house is a monarch more absolute and undisputed in +this wild country than most eastern kings are to-day. + +I was more interested in the huge boulders of smooth granite which rose +strangely from the street in places, and broke its regularity. These +rounded and noble rocks often topped the houses. What man had built +looked mean and transitory beside the poise and fine contours of the +rocks. The colony of giant rocks had a look of settled and tranquil +solidity, a friendly and hospitable aspect. They might have been old +friends which time had proved; the houses beside them were alien by +contrast. I felt that San Antonio had merely imposed itself on them, +that they tolerated the village because it was but an incident; that +they could afford to wait. When I saw them there I recognised the +village of my map. I climbed to the summit of one, over its weather-worn +shelves. It had a skin of lichen, warm in the sun and harshly familiar. +The curious hieroglyphics of the lichen were intelligible enough, and +more easily read than the signs on the walls of the inns. I learned +where I was; and knew that when the day of the great rubber house had +long passed, my village would still be there, and prospering. + +Below my rock, on the land side--to which I had turned my back--was a +monstrous cesspool. It was in the centre of the village. It was the +capital of all flies, and the source and origin of all smells, varying +smells which reposed, as I had found when below in the hot and stagnant +street, in strata, each layer of smell invisible but well-defined. Among +the weeds in the roads were many derelict cans. Over the empty tins, and +the garbage, pulsed and darted hundreds of Brazil's wonderful insects. + +But I was above all that, on my high rock. Its height released me to a +wide and splendid liberty. I cannot tell you all that my vantage +surveyed. But chiefly I was assured by what I saw that I was more +central even than my eyes showed; they merely found for me the +intimation. Here was all the proof I wanted; for faith is not blind, but +critical, yet instantly transcends to knowledge at the faintest glimmer +of authentic light, as when an exile who is beset by inexplicable and +puissant circumstance among strangers whose tongue is barbarous, is +surprised at a secret sign passed there of fellowship, and is at once +content. Yet I can report but a broad river flowing smooth and bright +out of indefinite distance between dark forests to the wooded islands +below; and by the islands suddenly accelerated and divided, in a slight +descent, pouring to a lower level in taut floods as smooth, noiseless, +and polished as mercury. Lower still was the gleaming turmoil of the +falls, pulsing, and ever on the point of vanishing, but constant, its +shouting riot baffled by the green cliffs everywhere. But I could +escape, for once, over the parapets of the jungle to the upper rolling +ocean of leaves; to the distance, dim and blue, the region where man has +never been. + + * * * * * + +There was a man who looked like a sensational ruffian who boarded us one +morning at Porto Velho, and said he had come to find me. He was going up +into the forest, beyond the track, and would I go with him? That made me +look at him again, and with some anxiety; for I had tried before to get +away, but the crowd on the "Capella" disliked the idea. The Doctor +talked dysentery and things. He said it was safer to keep to the ship +during the month we had still to spend at Porto Velho. I felt, overborne +by their arguments, a rather thin sort of adventurer. That mysterious +railway would have drawn the mind of any man who had not lost his +curiosity, and who valued being alive more than his chance of old age. +The track went from Porto Velho into outer darkness. It left the +clearing and the village of mushroom buildings, the place where the +inhuman had been moderately subdued, where a modicum of industry was +established in a continent of primitive wild, crossed a creek by a +trestle bridge in view of our steamer, and vanished; that was the end of +it, so far as we knew. Men came back to the settlement through that hole +of the forest, and boarded the "Capella" to tell us, in long hot nights, +something of what the forest of the Madeira was hiding; and they were +bearded like Crusoe, pallid as anaemic women, and speckled with insect +bites. These men said that where they had been working the sun never +shone, for his light was stopped on the unbroken green which, except +where the big rivers flowed, roofed the whole land. I liked the look of +the stranger who had come to persuade me to this rare holiday. He said +his name was Marion Hill, of Texas. He wore muddy riding breeches, and a +black shirt open at the throat, and boots of intricately embossed +leather which came well up his thighs, spurs that would have ravelled a +pachyderm, and the insolent hat of a bandit. He had a waistbelt heavy +with guns and ammunition. I saw his face, and divined instantly that +this was a man, and that the memory of a time with him would serve me as +a refuge in the grey and barren years, and as a solace. I told him I +would get my things together. The Skipper called after me that if I +returned too late I should have to walk home. + +There was a commissary train next morning, taking men and supplies to +the camps. It had a number of open waggons, loaded with material, about +which the labourers going up to replenish the gangs made themselves as +comfortable as they could. I had an indiarubber bag for all my +belongings, being told that it was best for strapping to a mule, and a +valuable lifebuoy when a canoe overturned. I accepted it with perfect +faith, for I knew nothing of mules or canoes. The train moved off, a +bell on the engine ringing sepulchrally. Hill and I were packed into a +box car, which had a door open on either side for light and air. Two +American engineers were in charge, there was an Austrian to superintend +the distribution at each camp of the provisions, the Austrian had an +Italian assistant, and a few Barbadian blacks were there to move about +the packages. I sat on a case of tinned fruit. Hill reposed on one of +the shelves where we should stow fever victims, when we collected them. +There was no more room in the car, and another degree of heat would have +meant complete ruin. + +When Porto Velho is left for the place where the line is to end, when +completed, though it is but 250 miles away, two months at least is +required for the return journey. That way goes the paymaster, with his +armed escort, and every bundle of shovels and tin of provisions. When I +went, too, the train helped for sixty miles. Then most of the material +was transported at the Rio Caracoles, a tributary of the Madeira, and +taken by boats in stages up the main stream, cargoes and boats being +hauled round each cataract. Travellers could shorten the journey by +going overland part of the way, mules being kept on the hither side of +the Caracoles river for that purpose. + +We delivered some patients at the hospital, went through a cutting of +red granite to the back of San Antonio, and then entered the forest. +That absorbed us. Thenceforward, and until I reached the ship again, I +was dominated by the lofty, silent, confused, and brooding growth. +Everywhere it was dramatically passionate in its intensity, an arrested +riot of green life, and its muteness kept expectant attention fixed upon +it. The right of way through the forest was a hundred feet wide. On each +side of us the trees rose like virid cliffs. The trees usually were of +slender girth, almost as straight as fir poles, rising perhaps for sixty +feet without a branch. Occasionally there was a giant, a silk cotton +tree, or the strange tree with its grey trunk and pale birch-like habit +of foliage which I had noticed on the riverside; but they were not +common. Palms were numerous. From ground to high parapet the spaces +between the columns were filled with lianas, unrelated big leaves, and +the characteristic fronds of the endogens. In this older part of the +track, though it had been made but little more than a year, the scrub +was dense. The undergrowth was often so strong and aggressive as to +brush the train as we slowly bumped along. Sometimes we went through +deep cuttings in the red clay, close enough for me to notice it was +interstratified with waterworn but angular quartz peebles. But the track +usually was over flat country, only rarely crossing a gulley. + +At every maintenance camp we stopped to deliver supplies. From out of a +small huddle of shanties made of leaves and poles, insignificant beneath +the forest wall, a number of languid half-breeds, merely in pants and +hats, would loiter through the hot sun to us for their sustenance. The +men of those secluded huts must have been glad of our temporary uproar, +and our new faces. The bell rang, and we left them to burial in their +deep silence again. There were intervening camps, which had been +deserted as the work progressed. These were even more interesting to me. +The work of the human, when he leaves it to the wild from which he has +won it with so much pain, has an appeal of its own, with its abandoned +ruin returning to the ground again. There would be a sandy swamp, and +standing back from the line some weather-worn shanties with roofs awry. +I am sure there were ghosts in those camps. One we passed, and it was +called Camp 10-1/2, and resting against its open front where the posts +were giving was a butterfly net. I pointed this out. "Oh, that," said +Hill. "Old man Biddell. I knew him. He was all right. He was great on +bugs and butterflies. Used to wear spectacles. He was a good engineer +though. Died of blackwater fever before the line got past this camp. +That was his shack." And that was his butterfly net, all of Biddell now, +his sole monument and reminder. As we bumped by the huts the helicons +and swallow tails rose precipitously from the mangled cans and cast +rubbish. I never knew Biddell, the man with spectacles and a butterfly +net, but a first rate railway man, who left that net outside his hut one +morning, and at evening was buried, but now I am doomed to think of him +while I live. + +It was near midnight when we reached the last active camp but one on the +line, where we alighted. It was wiser, I was told, to run the remaining +length of the track by daylight. Here a doctor and a few engineers, +bearing handlamps against which moths were blundering, met us in a place +which seemed to be the bottom of a well, for the black shadows which +rose round us shut out all but a few stars. The men raised joyous cries +at the sight of Hill; and they took this stranger on trust. We fed in a +hut which was four poles and a roof. One pole had a hurricane lamp tied +to it. There was an enormous quiet, which the men seemed to delight in +breaking with their voices. Four planks nailed unevenly to uprights was +our table, and we sat crooked on a similar but lower construction. We +ate out of enamelled plates with iron instruments, and it was very good +indeed. There were four of us who were white, and we were babes in the +wood. One of us pretended he was playing on a Jew's-harp, sang songs +riotously, and then began to talk long and earnestly of New York. These +men lived in four railway waggons which had doors made of copper gauze, +berths with mosquito bars, and portraits of the folk at home; and in the +case of the doctor the waggon smelt of iodoform, had one wall full of +bottles, and a table with a board and chessmen. In one of those waggons +I lay down to sleep under a net; but the blanket felt damp and had a +foreign smell. My thoughts crowded me. For long I listened to so much +jungle pressing close to my bed, waiting for it to make known its near +but unseen presence with a voice; but it did not. + +Next morning at sunrise the train moved forward to the construction camp +at the Rio Caracoles. I rode on a truck pushed in front of the +locomotive, perched there with some engineers who kept a careful eye on +the track. I saw at once why the train did not proceed at night. It was +too speculative altogether. Behind us the locomotive's smoke stack +rolled like a steamer's funnel when a beam sea is running. This part of +the line crossed many ravines, where we looked down upon the tree tops; +and when on a frail wooden bridge which crossed a vacancy like that such +movements of the drunken engine behind us became dazzling. Then, too, +there were some high "fills," or embankments. After heavy rains these +have a habit of retiring from the metals, which are left looped and +twisted in mid-air. An engineer told me that one cannot always tell when +an embankment is on the point of retiring. He was carefully watching, +however. But we reached the construction camp. + +At the construction camp by the side of the Rio Caracoles we stayed two +days. There was the end of the line, and the men who were growing the +track were so busy that I was left to my own devices. Till the +railwaymen came none but the Caripuna Indians knew what was there; so +into the woods, of course, I would go, trying every track which led from +the camp. A botanist might have seen some difference from the forest at +Porto Velho, but I could not discover any. In appearance it was exactly +the same. The trees mostly were arborescent laurels I believe, with +smooth brown boles which were blotched through their outer cuticle +peeling away, much in the manner of that of the plane tree. The brown +parchments of their laurel-like leaves covered the floor of the woods. +The trees were rarely of great diameter, but their crowns were so +distant that nothing could be made of their living foliage. I saw no +flowers at all. There were few orchids, but the large shapely emerald +coloured leaves of pothos plants were very frequent, sitting in the +angles of branches and trunk. Aloft was always the wreckage of vines +suspended, as vaguely seen and as motionless as cobwebs and +dilapidations in the overhead darkness of high vaults. I rarely heard a +sound in that forest, though there was a bird which called. I often +heard it in the woods of the upper Madeira. It called thrice, as a boy +who whistles shrilly through his fingers; a long call, and then another +whistle in the same key followed instantly by a falling note. One +delightful walk was along a path which had not been made by the +railwaymen, for it was evidently old, as it ran, a cleft in the trees, +not through broken timber, but in partial sunshine, with a mesh of vines +and freely growing plants on either side. It led downwards to a small +stream, which was cumbered with fallen and rotting timber, a cool hollow +where ferns were abundant. It was in the woods at the Caracoles that I +first saw the great morpho butterfly at home. This species, peculiar to +South America, is rarely seen except in the shades of the virgin forest. +One day in the twilight aisles near the Caracoles camp, where nothing +moved, and all was a grey monotone, it so surprised me with its happy +undulating flight--as though it danced along, and were in no hurry--its +great size, and its bright blue wings, that I rose mesmerised, stumbling +after it through the dank litter, thoughtless of direction, not thinking +of the danger of losing my way, thinking of nothing but that joyous +resplendent creature dancing aloft ahead of me in the gloom and just +beyond my reach. Its polished blue wings flashed like speculae. It might +have been a drifting fragment of sunny sky. I had never seen anything +alive so beautiful. A fall over a log brought me to sobriety, and when I +looked up it was gone. Afterwards I saw many of them; sometimes when +walking the forest there would be morphos always in sight. + +The construction camp was not more than a month old. Perched on an +escarpment by the line was a row of tents, and at the back of the tents +some flimsy huts built of forest stuff. They stood about a ruin of +felled trees, with a midden and its butterflies in the midst. Probably +thirty white men were stationed there. They were then throwing a wooden +bridge across the Caracoles. Most of them were young American civil +engineers, though some were English; and when I found one of them--and +he happened to be a countryman of mine--balancing himself on a narrow +beam high over a swift current, and, regardless of the air heavy with +vapour and the torrid sun, directing the disposal of awkward weights +with a concentration and keenness which made me recall with regret the +way I do things at times, I saw his profession with a new regard. I +noticed the men of that transient little settlement in the wilds were in +constant high spirits. They betrayed nothing of the gravity of their +undertaking. They might have been boys employed at some elaborate jest. +But it seemed to me to be a pose of heartiness. They repelled reality +with a laugh and a hand clapped to your shoulder. At our mess table, +over the dishes of toucan and parrot supplied by the camp hunters, they +rallied each other boisterously. There was a touch of defiance in the +way they referred to the sickness and the shadow; for it was notorious +that changes were frequent in their little garrison. They were forced to +talk of these changes, and this was the way they chose to do it. As if +laughter was their only prophylactic! But such laughter, to a visitor +who did not have to wait till fever took him, but could go when he +liked, could be answered only with a friendly smile. Some of my cheery +friends of the Caracoles were but the ghosts of men. + + * * * * * + +Hill warned me late one afternoon to be ready to start at sunrise, and +then went to play poker. On my way to my hut, at sunset, I stopped to +gossip with the young doctor, where he was busy dressing wounds at his +surgery. The labourers, half-breeds, Brazilians, and Bolivian Spaniards, +work being over, were giving the doctor a full evening with their +ailments. Mostly these were skin troubles. The least abrasion in the +tropics may spread to a horrid and persistent wound. The legs of the +majority of these natives were unpleasant with livid scars. In one case +a vampire bat had punctured a man's arm near the elbow while he slept, +and that little wound had grown disastrously. We were in a region where +the pium flies swarmed, tiny black insects which alight on the hands and +face, perhaps a dozen at a time, and gorge themselves, though you may be +unconscious of it. Where the pium fly feeds it leaves a dot of +extravasated blood which remains for weeks, so that most of us were +speckled. Even these minute wounds were liable to become deep and bad. +There were larger flies which put their eggs in the human body, where +they hatch with dire results. (Do not think the splendid tropics have +nothing but verdure, orchids, butterflies, and coral snakes banded +orange and black and crimson and black.) So the doctor was a busy man +that evening. The floor of his surgery was made of unequal boughs; the +walls and roof were of dried fronds. A lamp was slung on a doorpost. He +was a young American, and he did not grumble at his bumpy floor, the bad +light, the appliances and remedies which were all one should expect in +the jungle, nor the number of his patients, except comically. He told me +he was rather keen on the diseases of the tropics. He liked them. (I +should think he must have liked them.) He was merrily insolent with +those swarthy and melancholy men, and they smiled back sadly at the +clever, handsome, and lively youngster. He was quick in his decisions, +deft, insistent, kind, and thorough, working down that file of pitiable +humanity, as careful with the last of the long row as with the first; +telling me, as he went along, much that I had never heard before, with +demonstrations. "Don't go," he cried, when I would have left him; for I +thought it might be he was as kind with this stranger as he was with the +others. "Ah! don't go. Let me hear a true word or two." He said he would +give me a treat if I stayed. He finished, put his materials away +deliberately, accurately, his back to me, while I saluted him as a fine +representative of ours. He turned, free of his task and jolly, and +produced that treat of his, two bottles of treasured and precious ginger +ale. It was a miracle performed. We talked till the light went out. + +Much later a cry in the woods woke me. It was yet dark, but I could see +Hill up, and fumbling with his accoutrements. Out I jumped, though still +unreasonably tired; and sleepily dressed. When I turned to Hill, to see +if he were ready, he was then under his net, watching me. He explained +he had just returned from poker, and was wondering why I was dressing, +but did not like to ask, knowing that Englishmen have ways that are not +American. So the sun was up long before we were, though presently, in a +small canoe, we embarked on the Caracoles. This tributary of the Madeira +comes from nobody knows where. It is a river of the kind which explorers +in these forests have sometimes mentioned, to our fearful joy. The +sunlight hardly reached the water. The river was merely a drain +burrowing under the jungle. The forest on its banks met overhead. There +was little foliage below; we saw but the base of the forest, grey +columns that might have been of stone upholding a darkness from which +dead stuff suspended. The canoe had to dodge the lianas, which dropped +to the water. The noise of our paddles convoyed us down stream, a rout +of panic echoes trying to escape. We came to an opening and full +daylight presently, and landed by a mule corral; and I began a lonely +ride with Hill through the forest. The mule was such a docile little +brown creature that I was left in the silence to my thoughts, which were +interrupted now and then by the wandering blue flame of a morpho. My +mule followed Hill's mule along a winding trail, and our leader was +nearly always out of sight. I do not remember much of my first ride in +the forest. I had an impression of being at a viewless distance from the +sun. We were on the abysmal floor of a growth which was not trees, but +the hoary pediments of a structure which was too high and vast for human +sight. We rode in the basal gloom of it, no more than lost ants there, +at an immeasurable depth in the atmosphere. The roof of the world was +far away. Somewhere was the sun, for occasionally there was a well which +its light had filled, and a grove of green palms, complete and personal, +standing at the bottom of the well, living and reasonable shapes. Or one +of the morphos would flicker among those spectral bastions, aerial and +bright as a fairy in Hades. The sombre mind caught it at once, an +unexpected gleam of hope, a bright blue thought to set among one's +shapeless fears. We descended into hollows, going down into darker +fathoms of the shades; mounted again through brighter suffusions of day, +and in a while came out upon the open lane in the woods, the long cut in +the jungle made for the railway, when it should get so far. + +Now I could see my companion. He was from Texas, and it was easy to +guess that. In the long rides which followed in the land where we looked +upon what was there for the first time since genesis, where we might +have been in the hush of the seventh day, so new, strange, and quiet was +all, the figure ahead of me, with its long boots, negligent black shirt, +the guns about the waist, and the hat with its extravagant size nobly +raked, made me stop at times to assure myself that I was not pursuing a +day-dream of boyhood, too much Mayne Reid in my head, especially when my +wild and improbable companion paused under a group of statuesque palms +and looked back at me--I suppose to make sure that I was still there, +and that the silence had not absorbed me utterly, a faint rustle of +intruding sound in a virgin and absorbent world. And again I remember +the sparkle and lift of early morning there. The air was new, it was +stimulative, it recharged me with buoyant youth. To breathe that air in +the fresh of the morning was exaltation, and to see the young sunlight +on the ardent foliage was to know the springs of life were full. That +was at the breakfast hour, when the camp fires crackled and were +aromatic, the smoke going straight to the tree tops. Then quickly the +narrow track through the forest filled with day, increased in heat till +I felt I could bear no more of it, and so gazed vacantly at the mule's +ears, merely enduring and numbed. The vitality of the morning went, and +in the fierce pour of light I looked no more to the strange leaves and +vines, the curious fronds, the anthills by the way, the butterflies and +birds, but had only a dull dread that the avenue through which we were +riding was straight and interminable. There was no escape from this +heat. There were no openings through which we could retreat under the +trees. The air was immobile; the air itself was the incumbent heat. The +only shadows were under the mules' bellies. Cruel and relentless noons! +How the surveyors endured it, standing for long eyeing their exacting +instruments in such a defeating glare, I do not know. At the end of each +day my pigskin leggings were like wet brown paper with sweat, and my +hands crinkled and bleached as though they had been in a soda bath. + +We reached another and greater tributary of the Madeira, the Rio +Jaci-Parana. Here there was a very extensive clearing as great as the +one at Porto Velho. The bridging of the Jaci would be a considerable +undertaking, consequently there were numerous huts dotted about the +rough open ground; but I think the original intention in cutting back +the jungle to such an extent was that in the days to come a town would +grow there. I imagine it will not, and that the project is abandoned. In +one of my early walks in the woods I came by chance upon the new +cemetery; it was already large. The Jaci country has proved to be more +than usually unhealthy. The ground was cleared down to a coarse herbage, +round which stood shadowing trees. Little crucifixes, made by splitting +a stick and putting another stick crosswise in the slit, were planted at +all sorts of drunken angles in the ground. One large cross in the centre +stood for all the dead. There were no names given. A Brazil nut-tree +grew alongside this graveyard in the jungle, so tall that the flock of +screaming parrots about its foliage were but drifting black specks. + +Because Hill had a touch of the fever we stayed for some days by the +Jaci. I had a hut given to me, typical of the rest; but I was so much +alone in it that that hut on the Jaci, where our remoteness from human +things tested and known, the aloofness and quiet of the forest, the +deadly nature of the romantic and beautiful river bank where we were +marooned, and the sickness of my friend Hill, threw me upon my centre, +until I began even to talk to myself, and received such an impress of +the minute details of my little habitation that, ephemeral as it was and +now long since gone, it endures, of coloured and indestructible stuff, +with a sunny portal I still can enter whenever my mind turns that way. +It was of four palm trunks, lapped round and over with mats of leaves. +The floor was of untrimmed branches, two feet from the earth, and their +unexpected inequalities, never remembered, were always jolting my +thoughts as I walked across. They were crooked, and I could see the +dusty earth two feet beneath where brown and green lizards ran. At one +end was a verandah with a narrow floor made of the lids of soap and +dynamite boxes, and laid without any idea that some curious tenant might +wish to read the manufacturers' full names and see their complete +trademarks. It was a puzzle. There was nothing to do, and I searched +long on my verandah floor for the clue to one embarrassing fragment of a +stencilled word. Hill sometimes huddled in a hammock on one side of the +verandah, a leg hanging limply over, his thin sallow face drawn and +resting on his breast, and his eyes shut; and I sat near him on the +rail, silent, alone with any thought I met, and gazing blankly down the +steep slope, past two tall Brazil nut-trees, to the half-hidden Rio Jaci +below, and the roof of the forest opposite, over which the sun set each +day in uplifted splendour. I remembered but one conversation during that +wait. An elderly white man came up to the verandah one evening, and +murmured something to Hill, who opened his eyes, and looked at his +visitor under weary lids. This man was one of Hill's subordinates. He +had something to say of the work; but one would hardly call it speech. +The flow of his life was so weak that he could do no more than lift a +few small words from his gaping mouth between his breaths. He held on to +the verandah. His loose clothes hung straight down from his bones. The +veins were in blue knots on his forehead. "Say," said Hill, rousing +himself, "I want you to ride to the Caracoles, go down to Porto Velho, +and take this note to the hospital." The man said nothing, but nodded. +Hill scrawled his note, and the man left. "He'll be dead in a month," +said Hill, five minutes after the man had gone. "But he would not go to +the hospital for his health. I have to pretend that he must go for mine. +He may as well die in a comfortable bed.... I wish those damned parrots +would cease!" They were somewhere down by the river, unseen, but all the +sound there was, their voices long, keen and distracting flaws in the +pellucid and coloured dayfall. + +One morning we crossed the Jaci, and on the opposite shore some mules +were already geared with Texan saddles, the hombres at their heads, +waiting for us. I considered my mule. He was a big, grey, upstanding +fellow, with the legs and feet of a racehorse, the head of a hammer, and +alert and inquisitive ears. He was very much alive. I had no doubt he +could leave anywhere like light, when he had a mind for it. So that I +turned to Hill, and said, "Is mine a quiet animal? Is he vicious?" "O +say," said my guide, glancing carelessly at my dubious mount, "I guess +he's just a mule." When a hombre shouted at my mule he stepped briskly, +with more than a hint of the malicious rebel in his gait. + +I knew it would happen, and it did. One foot was no sooner buried in a +wooden shoe called a stirrup than he was off, like an explosion. A +desperate leap got my other leg over my travelling sack, lashed on his +rump, and I came down in the saddle, much surprised. Texan saddles are +not leather pads for riding domestic creatures, but thrones for ruling +devils, and the bit would have broken the mouth of a hippopotamus. The +brute stopped, turned back one ear, and his thought was in his swivel +eye. "You wait," I saw him say. In the few engrossing moments when his +body was expanding and contracting under me I got some idea of the force +I was supposed to guide, and it did not make my mind easy, for an office +chair had been my most unstable seat till then. Yet off we went quietly, +along the track, and Hill was in front, and my mule was as meek as a +sheep. There came a swamp, into which he went to the knees, and I +dismounted, jumping from hummock to hummock, encouraging him, and +showing him the best places. His brown eyes were then like those of a +good woman. So leaning forward, when we were through, I patted his sleek +neck, and gave him pleasant words. Afterwards, when he showed a certain +precious care in difficult places, for the country was very broken, +stepping like a tight-rope walker, I was fool enough to think it was +because of our understanding. Though I believe he would have deceived +anybody. + +At noon we left the track and entered the forest by a path so narrow +that the trees touched our legs, and sometimes we had just time to duck +beneath a noose which a liana dangled in our faces. It was a low and +narrow tunnel, and it descended to a bottom where a shallow stream +brawled among granite boulders; thence up the trail went through the +trees and vines again, and at last we came to a little clearing, where +there was a hut, and men who would give us meat and drink. We +dismounted. I rubbed my mule's soft nose, and spoke him playfully, as a +familiar; but when entering the hut was rebuked by a man there for +making a short cut round the heels of my mule. "Never do it. Don't give +him a chance. A mule will be peaches for ten years waiting for the sure +chance of getting his heels right on your stomach. They're not horses, +them mules. They don't bite, and they don't muzzle you and show +friendly. They've got no feelings. That chap of yours, his mother was an +ass, and his father was old Solfernio himself. But they've all got one +good point--they're barren." + +The mule stood deep in thought till I was mounted again; then instantly +bolted back along the path which led to the ravine. The idle hombre had +mishandled the reins, and I could get no pull. I went across that +clearing like (so Hill said afterwards) Tod Sloan up. The beast, his +ears back, was in a frenzy, and the convulsions of his powerful body +made my thoughts pallid and ghastly. Nothing but disaster could stop +him, and the black mouth of that steep tunnel in the forest yawned +before us, and grew larger, though not large enough. He took the opening +as clean as a lucky shot; but I was laid carefully along his back. Why +we missed the tangle of woods and the rocks in that precipitate descent +is known only to my lucky stars. I had my feet from the stirrups, my +toes hooked on his rump, one arm round the horn of the saddle, and the +other stretched along his sawing neck. I saw the roots and stones leap +up and by us, close to my face. Several things occurred to me, and one +was that some methods of dire fate were fatuous and undignified. I +wondered also whether I should be taken back to the ship, or buried +there. The impetus of the brute, which I expected would send us +somersaulting among the rocks of the bottom, took him partly up the +hither slope, and soon he had to gather his haunches for the upward +leaps. I slipped off. He swung round at the length of the reins, and +eyed me, cocking his ears derisively. A horse's nerves are human-like, +and a horse would have been in a muck, but this murderous mule was calm +and mocking. I watched him, and listened for an obscene and confident +guffaw. + +I found afterwards that punishment has no more effect on them than +kindness. There is no guidance in this matter, take the mule all round. +It is dealing with the uncanny. It is better to cross yourself when you +go near a mule. Every morning about a camp we would watch the hombres +gear up those pensive and placid creatures. They were sleek, lissom, and +beautiful, and it was a pleasure to watch them. But as soon as the +business of the day began one of the mules (and there was no prophecy as +to which one it would be) became a homicidal maniac. At one camp it was +necessary to keep a hundred or more mules in reserve, and there, for +their health, a sane old horse was kept also. The horse was a knacker's +body, a sorry spectacle, and in that climate he but pottered about +waiting for disease to take him. He was smaller than the fine and +healthy mules, but the respect the hammer-heads had for him was comical, +and a great help to the men. Without the horse, it would have been +opening the door of an asylum to have let the mules out of the corral to +water at the river. But he led the way, and they bunched round him +bashfully, and followed him to the stream. He took no notice of them +whatever. He did not flatter them by pretending to be aware of their +existence. When he had had his fill, he turned, and ambled through them, +scorning to see them, and returned to the corral. Round went all the +mules nearest to him, and any of them on the outskirts of the mob that +stayed on because they did not see him go lost their heads, when they +looked up, and risked their necks in short cuts through the timber. "Ho, +mule!" would shout the hombres in alarm; for even mules cost money. + + * * * * * + +The land through which we were riding shall have a little railway there +some day, if the men who are building it keep their hearts of brass, and +refuse in working hours to remember London and New York. When it is +there, that short line, it will begin and end in places having names +which will convey little meaning to people outside Brazil; but to know +what endurance of valour, but chiefly what raillery and light-hearted +disregard of the gods who put baleful forests guarded by dragons--the +dragons of mythology were lambs to what mosquitoes are--in the path of +weak men pursuing their purpose, to know what has gone to the building +of that track, though it nowhere plainly shows, for the graveyards are +casual and obscure, brings you to a stand, surprised into awe of your +fellows, as though through a coarse disguise you caught a gleam of +divinity. Something shows, a light shows, which is beyond human. Would +men be so prodigal of life and time if they were not aware of their +great wealth? I don't know. My travels never brought me to that ultimate +assurance. But I did see that my fellow-men are indifferent, spendthrift +with their known and scanty store as though they were immortals, the +remittance men of Great Jove. I have no doubt now the line will be +finished some day; but there were times, riding along the roughly +cleared trail where it is to be, and we came upon places where men, in a +spasm of pointless and soon expiring energy had scratched and mauled the +pristine earth, when I did not think so. Always the same dumb mystery +was about us at noon as at nightfall. I felt we were lost at the back of +the world, that we had crossed the boundary beyond which the voice of +traffic never goes, and were idly wandering on the confines of oblivion. +Sometimes I had that consciousness of futility which comes to us when, +in sleep, we are earnest in the absurd activities of a dream, one point +of the reason remaining awake to wonder at the antics of the busy but +blind mind. Why was I there at all? Was I there? Those forlorn spots in +the forest where our fellows had been before us, which we two riders +overlooked alone, seemed to show that those men, while in the midst of +their feverish labour, had recovered their minds, and had seen the +wilderness was too vast, was unconquerable; and they had fled. There +before us was what they had done. A deep trench would be in the track, +the sand thrown up on either side. Some dead trees would be prone in our +path, and we had to ride round them. There would be a few empty huts of +leaves, with old ashes at the entrances, and a midden with its usual +gorgeous butterflies. There would not be a sign of life, except the +butterflies over the refuse, and not a sound or a movement but a clink +from our own harness, and the heads of our mules impatient with the +flies. Over the evidence of man's far-fetched enterprise and industry, +his short and ferocious attack on the wild, brooded the forest. That +bent over us, and it might have been solicitous and compassionate, or it +might have been merely curious about the behaviour of the surprising +creatures who had come there for the first time, and had been so active +for a while. Sitting in the pour of the sun, looking upon the scanty +work of my fellows, and then upon the near watchful ranks of that +continent of trees pressing close to regard the grave-like trench into +which man's hope might have been thrown, I had a dread of the easy and +enduring dominion of those powers which were before man. + +We would ride on then, sometimes up to our saddles in swamps, and every +day I lost faith that there was any company of our fellows in that +desolation, who would take our mules at nightfall, and show hammocks for +our rest. But always before night caught us we would spy a few huts +diminutive under the cliffs of forest--land ho!--and the little outpost +of two or three engineers and a doctor would meet us as we came up. Such +a camp was like finding security and fellowship again after the +uncertainty and emptiness of the sea. The voices of new friends disarmed +the forest. It was not curious that we found it so easy to talk and +laugh. + +One such camp I remember well. We came upon it late, and my bones, +through a longer ride than usual in the wooden saddle, had grown into an +unjointed frame. This was the real meaning of fatigue. My body was a +comprehensive ache. Yet my mind was alert and buoyant; and I remembered +that perhaps it was so because I had been well bitten by the mosqitoes +of the Jaci-Parana, a first effect of the inoculation; so I swallowed +twenty grains of my store of quinine. + +You in settled lands, unless you have been very poor indeed and know +what trouble is and what friends are, have never seen the face of your +brother, nor the serenity of evening when you have found, without +expecting it, shelter for the night; you don't know what the taste of +bread and meat is, nor the savour of tobacco, nor what comfortable +security is the whispering of a comrade unseen in the shadows of a +resting place, nor what it is to sleep. I found those gifts are not +means to life only, but reasons for living too; something to live for. +With these at nightfall, our frail little hut, beleaguered in the +limitless woods, the shack in which the ants and spiders swarmed and +gross insects rang on the metal lamp, where we loafed in hammocks, +smoking, and listened to the cries of we knew not what in the unknown +about us, was impregnable to the hosts of darkness. + +Perhaps I remember that camp so well because it was a night of full +moon. There were three huts. We were deep in the trees. The dark walls +of that well in the jungle rose sheer all round us. Nobody knew what was +beyond the huts. The moon appeared just clear of the lofty parapet of +the well, and poured down to us an imponderable rarity of bluish fire. +Wherever this fire lodged it stayed. Half-way up projected palm fronds, +and they were heavy patterns in burnished silver. Nameless shapes grew +luminous in the dark about us. The ragged thatch of a hut fell from its +apex in a cascade of lustrous fluid metal suddenly congealed. The gloom +beneath that shining roof was hollowed by the pale yellow light of a +lamp; so I could see, under the eaves, the three hammocks slung from the +posts. The quiet talk of my companions was the only sound. I limped with +weariness towards the voices, and sat in a shadow listening; and looked +beyond to sprays of motionless shining foliage leaning out from +inscrutable darkness. I seemed to have escaped from my tired body; my +disembodied mind was free and at large. A camp hunter had killed a +jaguar there, during the afternoon, they were saying. There were many +about, for we were beyond the railway men, the track being but a lane of +felled trees. They were saying the country there abounded with wild +life. Just as we arrived that evening one of the men brought in a +wounded animal, its nature so disguised that I thought it was a kind of +sloth. It was about two feet long, and covered with long grizzled hair +from its snout to the end of its considerable tail; but when I lifted +it, and the poor injured creature shook its hair from its eyes, I saw it +was a monkey; that anguished and fearful gaze which met mine was of my +own tiny brother. It was a rare and little-known creature, the Hairy +Saki, the first of its kind I had seen. The native took it away to eat +it. I may say that at every camp we ate what we could get; and being by +nature squeamish I never asked what it was that was put before me. +Whatever it was, there it was, and it was all they could give me. I only +emphatically directed that monkey flesh would be worse to me than +hunger. + +"There are plenty of tigers about here," called one of our hosts to me; +"I'll fix you with a gun to-morrow, and we'll have some fun." But thank +you, no. I did not carry arms throughout my journey. The jaguars did me +no hurt when I went exploring o' mornings; and as for me, I was not +looking for trouble. Quite politely the jaguars retired while I wandered +about alone; though I should have been delighted to have sighted one. +The whiffs of feral odour I got, especially in the neighbourhood of the +mules, about which the jaguars prowled at night, were my only big game +trophies. Sometimes an indistinguishable object would step across ahead +of me, or stir in a bush close by, drawing ear and eye at once in a +place where trees and leaves were always as fixtures, like the air. I +never met one of the larger natives of the place. I knew the parrots by +their voices. I heard and smelt the cats. The monkeys called from a +great distance; or a body would slip round a tree so like a shadow +moving that when I examined the place, and saw nothing, it was easy to +believe the eye was only suspicious. + +The men began to talk of the Indians. They said we were in the land of +the Caripunas. "You won't see them," said Hill. "I expect they are +watching us now though," he added, after a pause. I glanced up with some +interest at the spectral foliage, where right before me the pale +moonfire on leaves and trunks framed portals in the night. I could see +nothing. + +"It's odds that some of them have been following us all day," continued +Hill. "They watch us. They can't make us out. The rubber men told us the +Caripunas would kill and eat us. They kill the rubber men all right, and +a good job too. But they only slip through the forest watching us. I saw +some once. On the Jaci. I jollied them into putting their canoe ashore. +It was only a bark contraption, the roughest thing of its kind I've +seen, sharpened fore and aft by lacing the ends together with sinews. +They were fine light brown fellows, well made, and stark naked. The +black hair of some of them was frizzy. Curious, isn't it? But I've heard +that in the slave days runaway niggers got down here, and the forest +Indians collared them to improve their own miserable stock. The +Brazilians have always had a tradition of a frizzy-haired race on the +Madeira; and here they are. They had bows and arrows, those chaps, made +entirely of cane and wood. The arrows were tipped with macaw feathers, +and were over six feet long. I couldn't bend the bloomin' bow. These +fellows keep to the side rivers, and their villages are always hidden in +the woods. It's a funny thing, but whenever the surveyors come on a +village they find it has been vacated about a week." + +We were silent for a time, and then a half-breed crept up to a hammock +and spoke in Spanish to the doctor. The doctor laughed, and the fellow +went away. "He's asking for a piece of that onca to eat. He says it will +make him strong." They began to talk of that, and the talk went on to +what the Indians say of the mai d'aqua, the mother of the waters, who +frequents islands in the rivers and is the ruin of young men, and of +such dreads as the jurupari, and the curupira, and the maty tapere. + +They admitted it was easy to imagine such things into the forest. It +wasn't what was seen there. Only the trees and the shadows were seen. +But sometimes there were sounds. One of us, when alone making a traverse +in the forest, had heard a scream, as if a woman had been frightened, +and then there was no more sound. The camp doctor began to talk. He was +an Englishman. He sat upright in the middle of his hammock, swinging it +with one foot. "There was a curious yarn I heard about a tiger in +Hampshire. Ah! Hampshire! I had a practice there once, you know. It made +me so busy and popular that at last I began to wonder whether I wasn't +altogether too successful. It was the practice or me. As I wanted to +live on and do some useful work I slew the practice. I've got one or two +ideas about that beri-beri you chaps die of here. A doctor cannot serve +God and a lot of old women with colds.... Oh yes, about that tiger. +Well, one of those travelling shows came to our village. I could see the +steam of its roundabout engines from my surgery windows, and I told the +farmer who rented the field to the showmen that if he let a mechanical +organ come anywhere near my place again he could take his gallstone +somewhere else in future. + +"Late one night I got an urgent message to go over to the show. There +had been an accident. I was taken into a caravan. There was a fat woman +dressed as a pink fairy kneeling over a man stretched on a bunk, shaking +him, and crying. The man was dead all right. But I couldn't find a mark +on him. Diseased heart, I supposed, but he looked a good 'un. Some of +the well-made, powerful chaps have most unreliable hearts. The woman +kept crying out something about 'that beast of a tiger.' Curious sort of +remark, and I asked the boss afterwards what she meant. He shuffled +about a bit, pretending that she was talking silly. 'Nothing to do with +the tigress,' he said, 'although the man was found unconscious in her +cage.' 'It's such a tame thing,' said the showman. 'Anybody could handle +it. Never shows vice. Old Jackson'--that was the dead chap--'he'd been +inside tinkering with a partition. When we found him she was lying in a +corner as if asleep, and only sat up and yawned when we got him out of +her cage. Come and see for yourself.' + +"I went. There was nothing to see, except a slit-eyed tigress sitting up +in a corner of her cage, blinking at the lantern, and looking rather +spooky. A rather small creature, and prettily marked--one of the +melantic variety. + +"Well, the chap was buried after an inquest, and that inquest made me +ask a lot of questions afterwards. It was a simple affair, the inquest. +Death from natural causes. But there was something behind the evidence +of the man's wife, and I wanted to find out about that. + +"She told me she had a little girl, who got one night into the tent +where the big cats were kept. Nobody was there at the time. Next morning +she said to her mother, 'Mummie, who was the funny lady in Lucy's cage?' + +"Lucy was the name of the tigress. The child said that there was only +the lady in the cage, and the lady watched her. And that was all they +could get out of the kiddie. The funny thing about it is that once +before the child had come back with a yarn like that, after straying +into the menagerie tent late at night. The wife's idea was her husband +had died of fright. + +"Don't ask me what I want to make out, boys. I'm only just telling you +the yarn. There you are. + +"Well, before the show left our village, I heard they'd got a nigger to +look after the big cats. He was with the show two days. On the third day +he was missing. He went without drawing his money, and he had left open +the door of Lucy's cage. She hadn't attempted to get out. The nigger was +found some days after, wandering about the country, and a little +cracked, by all accounts. And that's all." The doctor struck a match, +and then hoisted his legs into the hammock. Somewhere far in the forest +the monkeys were howling. + +"That doctor is a good body mender," said Hill to me. "He is the most +entertaining liar on this job." + + + + +VI + + +When in the neighbourhood of the Girau Falls we returned to a camp known +as 22, which was merely a couple of huts, the station of two English +surveyors, who had with them a small party of Bolivians. The Bolivian +frontier was then but a little distance to the south-west. We rested for +a day there, and planned to make a journey of ten miles across country, +to the falls of the Caldeirao do Inferno. By doing so we should save the +wearying return ride along the track to the Rio Jaci-Parana, for at the +Caldeirao a launch was kept, and in that we could shoot the rapids and +reach the camp on the Jaci two days earlier. Some haste was necessary +now, for my steamer must be nearing her sailing time. And again, I +agreed the more readily to the plan of making a traverse of the forest +because it would give me the opportunity of seeing the interior of the +virgin jungle away from any track. Though I had been so long in a land +which all was forest I had not been within the universal growth except +for little journeys on used trails. A journey across country in the +Amazon country is never made by the Brazilians. The only roads are the +rivers. It is a rare traveller who goes through those forests, guided +only, by a compass and his lore of the wilderness. That for months I had +never been out of sight of the jungle, and yet had rarely ventured to +turn aside from a path for more than a few paces, is some indication of +its character. At the camp where we were staying I was told that once a +man had gone merely within the screen of leaves, and then no doubt had +lost, for a few moments, his sense of direction of the camp, for he was +never seen again. + +The equatorial forest is popularly pictured as a place of bright and +varied colours, with extravagant flowers, an abundance of fruits, and +huge trees hung with creepers where lurk many venomous but beautiful +snakes with gem-like eyes, and a multitude of birds as bright as the +flowers; paradise indeed, though haunted by a peril. Those details are +right, but the picture is wrong. It is true that some of the birds are +decorated in a way which makes the most beautiful of our temperate birds +seem dull; but the toucans and macaws of the Madeira forest, though +common, are not often seen, and when they are seen they are likely to be +but obscure atoms drifting high in a white light. About the villages and +in the clearings there are usually many superb butterflies and moths, +and a varied wealth of vegetation not to be matched outside the tropics, +and there will be the fireflies and odours in evening pathways. But the +virgin forest itself soon becomes but a green monotony which, through +extent and mystery, dominates and compels to awe and some dread. You +will see it daily, but will not often approach it. It has no splendid +blossoms; none, that is, which you will see, except by chance, as by +luck one day I saw from the steamer's bridge some trees in blossom, +domes of lilac surmounting the forest levels. Trees are always in +blossom there, for it is a land of continuous high summer, and there are +orchids always in flower, and palms and vines that fill acres of forest +with fragrance, palms and other trees which give wine and delicious +fruits, and somewhere hidden there are the birds of the tropical +picture, and dappled jaguars perfect in colouring and form, and brown +men and women who have strange gods. But they are lost in the ocean of +leaves as are the pearls and wonders in the deep. You will remember the +equatorial forest but as a gloom of foliage in which all else that +showed was rare and momentary, was foundered and lost to sight +instantly, as an unusual ray of coloured light in one mid-ocean wave +gleams, and at once goes, and your surprise at its apparition fades too, +and again there is but the empty desolation which is for ever but +vastness sombrely bright. + +One morning, wondering greatly what we should see in the place where we +should be the first men to go, Hill and I left camp 22 and returned a +little along the track. It was a hot still morning. A vanilla vine was +in fragrant flower somewhere, unseen, but unescapable. My little unknown +friend in the woods, who calls me at odd times--but I think chiefly when +I am near a stream--by whistling thrice, let me know he was about. Hill +said he thinks he has seen him, and that my little friend looks like a +blackbird. On the track in many places were objects which appeared to be +long cups inverted, of unglazed ware. Picking up one I found it was the +cap to a mine of ants, the inside of the clay cup being hollowed in a +perfect circle, and remarkably smooth. A paca dived into the scrub near +us. It was early morning, scented with vanilla, and the intricacy of +leaves was radiant. Nowhere in the screen could I see a place through +which it was possible to crawl to whatever was behind it. The front of +leaves was unbroken. Hill presently bent double and disappeared, and I +followed in the break he made. So we went for about ten minutes, my +leader cutting obstructions with his machete, and mostly we had to go +almost on hands and knees. The undergrowth was green, but in the +etiolated way of plants which have little light, though that may have +been my fancy. One plant was very common, making light-green feathery +barriers. I think it was a climbing bamboo. Its stem was vapid and of no +diameter, and its grasslike leaves grew in whorls at the joints. It +extended to incredible distances. We got out of that margin of +undergrowth, which springs up quickly when light is let into the woods, +as it was there through the cutting of the track, and found ourselves on +a bare floor where the trunks of arborescent laurels grew so thickly +together that our view ahead was restricted to a few yards. We were in +the forest. There was a pale tinge of day, but its origin was uncertain, +for overhead no foliage could be seen, but only deep shadows from which +long ropes were hanging without life. In that obscurity were points of +light, as if a high roof had lost some tiles. Hill set a course almost +due south, and we went on, presently descending to a deep clear stream +over which a tree had fallen. Shafts of daylight came down to us there, +making the sandy bottom of the stream luminous, as by a lantern, and +betraying crowds of small fishes. As we climbed the tree, to cross upon +it, we disturbed several morphos. We had difficulties beyond in a +hollow, where the bottom of the forest was lumbered with fallen trees, +dry rubbish, and thorns, and once, stepping on what looked timber solid +enough, its treacherous shell collapsed, and I went down into a cloud of +dust and ants. In clearing this wreckage, which was usually as high as +our faces, and doubly confused by the darkness, the involutions of dead +thorny creepers, and clouds of dried foliage, Hills got at fault with +our direction, but reassured himself, though I don't know how--but I +think with the certain knowledge that if we went south long enough we +should strike the Madeira somewhere--and on we went. For hours we +continued among the trees, seldom knowing what was ahead of us for any +distance, surviving points of noise intruding again after long in the +dusk of limbo. So still and nocturnal was the forest that it was real +only when its forms were close. All else was phantom and of the shades. +There was not a green sign of life, and not a sound. Resting once under +a tree I began to think there was a conspiracy implied in that murk and +awful stillness, and that we should never come out again into the day +and see a living earth. Hills sat looking out, and said, as if in answer +to an unspoken thought of mine which had been heard because there was +less than no sound there, that men who were lost in those woods soon +went mad. + +Then he led on again. This forest was nothing like the paradise a +tropical wild is supposed to be. It was as uniformly dingy as the old +stones of a London street on a November evening. We did not see a +movement, except when the morphos started from the uprooted tree. Once I +heard the whistle call us from the depths of the forest, urgent and +startling; and now when in a London by-way I hear a boy call his mate in +a shrill whistle, it puts about me again the spectral aisles, and that +unexpectant quiet of the sepulchre which is more than mere absence of +sound, for the dead who should have no voice. This central forest was +really the vault of the long-forgotten, dank, mouldering, dark, +abandoned to the accumulations of eld and decay. The tall pillars rose, +upholding night, and they might have been bastions of weathered +limestone and basalt, for they were as grim as ancient and ruinous +masonry. There was no undergrowth. The ground was hidden in a ruin of +perished stuff, uprooted trees, parchments of leaves, broken boughs, and +mummied husks, the iron globes of nuts, and pods. There was no day, but +some breaks in the roof were points of remote starlight. The crowded +columns mounted straight and far, almost branchless, fading into +indistinction. Out of that overhead obscurity hung a wreckage of +distorted cables, binding the trees, and often reaching the ground. The +trees were seldom of great girth, though occasionally there was a +dominant basaltic pillar, its roots meandering over the floor like +streams of old lava. The smooth ridges of such a fantastic complexity of +roots were sometimes breast high. The walls ran up the trunk, projecting +from it as flat buttresses, for great heights. We would crawl round such +an occupying structure, diminished groundlings, as one would move about +the base of a foreboding, plutonic building whose limits and meaning +were ominous and baffling. There were other great trees with compound +boles, built literally of bundles of round stems, intricate gothic +pillars, some of the props having fused in places. Every tree was the +support of a parasitic community, lianas swathing it and binding it. One +vine moulded itself to its host, a flat and wide compress, as though it +were plastic. We might have been witnessing what had been a riot of +manifold and insurgent life. It had been turned to stone when in the +extreme pose of striving violence. It was all dead now. + +But what if these combatants had only paused as we appeared? It was a +thought which came to me. The pause might be but an appearance for our +deception. Indeed, they were all fighting as we passed through, those +still and fantastic shapes, a war ruthless but slow, in which the battle +day was ages long. They seemed but still. We were deceived. If time had +been accelerated, if the movements in that war of phantoms had been +speeded, we should have seen what really was there, the greater trees +running upwards to starve the weak of light and food, and heard the +continuous collapse of the failures, and have seen the lianas writhing +and constricting, manifestly like serpents, throttling and eating their +hosts. We did see the dead everywhere, shells with the worms at them. +Yet it was not easy to be sure that we saw anything at all, for these +were not trees, but shapes in a region below the day, a world sunk +abysmally from the land of living things, to which light but thinly +percolated down to two travellers moving over its floor, trying to get +out to their own place. + +Late in the afternoon we were surprised by a steep hill in our way, +where the forest was more open. Palms became conspicuous on the slopes, +and the interior of the sombre woods was lighted with bright and +graceful foliage. The wild banana was frequent, its long rippling +pennants showing everywhere. The hill rose sharply, perhaps for six +hundred feet, and over its surface were scattered large stones, and +stones are rare indeed in this land of vegetable humus. They were often +six inches in diameter, and I should have said they were waterworn but +that I had seen them _in situ_ at one camp, where they occurred but +little below the surface in a friable sandstone, the largest of them +easily broken in the hand, for they were but ferrous concretions of +quartz grains. After exposure to the air they so hardened that they +could be fractured only with difficulty. We kept along the ridge of the +hill, finding breaks in the forest through which, as through unexpected +windows, we could see, for a wonder, over the roof of the forest, +looking out of our prison to a wide world where the sun was declining. +In the south-west we caught the gleam of the Madeira, and beyond it saw +a continuation of the range of hills on which we stood. + +In the low ground between the hill range and the river the forest was +lower, and was so tangled a mass that I doubted whether we could make a +way through it. We happened upon a deserted Caripuna village, three +large sheds, without sides, each but a ragged thatch propped on four +legs. The clearing was just large enough to hold them. I could find no +relics of the forest folk about. Damp leaves were thick on the floor of +each shelter. But it was lucky we found the huts, for thence a trail led +us to the river. We emerged suddenly from the forest, just as one goes +through a little door into the open street. We were on the bank of the +Madeira by the upper falls of the Caldeirao. It was still a great river, +with the wall of the forest opposite, just above which the sunset was +flaming, so far away that its tree trunks were but vertical lines of +silver in dark cliffs. A track used by the Bolivian rubber boatmen led +us down stream to the camp by the lower falls. + +It was night when we got to the three huts of the camp, and the river +could not be seen, but it was heard, a continuous low thundering. +Sometimes a greater shock of deep waters falling, an orgasm of the flood +pouring unseen, more violent than the rest, made the earth tremulous. +Men held up lanterns to our faces, and led us to a hut. It was but the +usual roof of leaves. We rested in hammocks slung between the posts, and +I ached in every limb. But here we were at last; and there is no more +luxurious bed than a hammock, yielding and resilient, as though you were +cradled on air; and there is no pipe like that smoked in a hammock at +night in the tropics after a day of toil and anxiety in a dissolving +heat, for the heat makes a pipe bitter and impossible; but if a tropic +night is cool and cloudless it comes like a benediction, and the silence +is a peace that is below you and around, and as high as the stars +towards which your face is turned. The ropes of the hammock creaked. +Sometimes a man spoke quietly, as though he were at a great distance. +The sound of the water receded, was heard only as in a sleep, and it +might have been the loud murmur of the spinning globe, heard because we +had left this world and had leisure for trifles in a securer world +apart. + +In the morning, while they prepared the little steam launch for its +journey down the rapids, I had time to climb about the smooth granite +boulders of the foreshore below the hut. A rock is so unusual in this +country that it is a luxury when found. The granite was bare, but in its +crevices grew cacti and other plants with fleshy leaves and swollen +stems. Shadowing the hut was a tree bearing trumpet-shaped flowers, and +before the blossoms humming birds were hovering, glowing and evanescent +morsels, remaining miraculously suspended when inserting their long +bills into the flowers, their little wings beating so rapidly that the +air seemed visible and radiant about them. Another tree here interested +me, for it was Bates Assacu, the only one I saw. It was a large tree, +with palmate leaves having seven fingers. Ugly spines studded even its +brown trunk. + +I looked out on the river dubiously. A rocky island was just off shore, +crowned with trees. Between us and the island, and beyond, the waters +heaved and circled, evidently of great depth, and fearfully disturbed +and swift. It looked all its name, the Caldeirao do Inferno--hell's +cauldron. There was not much white and broken water. But its surface was +always changing, whirlpools forming and revolving, then disappearing in +long wrenched strands of water. Sometimes a big tree would leap out of +the water, as though it had travelled upwards from the bottom, and then +would vanish again. + +We set out upon it, with an engineman and two half-breeds, and went off +obliquely for mid-stream. The engineman and navigator was a fair-haired +German. If the river had been sane and usual I should have had my eyes +on the forest which stood along each shore, for few white men had ever +looked upon it. But the river took our minds, and never in bad weather +in the western ocean have I seen water so full of menace. Yet below the +falls it was silent and unbroken. It was its smooth swiftness, its +strange checks and mysterious and deep convulsions, as though the river +bed itself was insecure, the startling whirlpools which appeared without +warning, circling depressions on the surface in which our launch would +have been but a straw, which shocked the mind. It was stealthy and +noiseless. The water was but an inch or two below our gunwale. We saw +trees afloat, greater and heavier than our midget of a craft, shooting +down the gently inclined shining expanse just as we were, and express; +and then, as if an awful hand had grasped them from below, they were +pulled under, and we saw them no more; or, again, and near to us and +ahead, a tree bole would shoot from below like an arrow, though no tree +had been drifting there. The shores were far away. + +The water ahead grew worse. The German crouched by his little throbbing +engine, looking anxiously--I could see his fixed stare--over the bows. +We were travelling indeed now. The boat, in a rapid tremor, and +oscillating violently, was clutched at the keel by something which +coiled strongly about us, gripped us, and held us; and the boat, mad and +terrified, in an effort to escape, made a circuit, the water lipping at +her gunwale and coming over the bows. The river seemed poised a foot +above the bows, ready to pour in and swamp us. The German tried to get +her head down stream. Hills began tearing at his ammunition belt, and I +stooped and tugged at my boot laces.... + +The boat jumped, as if released. The German turned round on us grinning. +"It ees all right," he said. He began to roll a cigarette nervously. "We +pull it off all right," said the German, wetting his cigarette paper. +The boat was free, dancing lightly along. The little engine was singing +quickly and freely. + +The Madeira here was as wide as in its lower reaches, with many islands. +There were hosts of waterfowl. We landed once at a rubber hunter's sitio +on the right bank. Its owner, a Bolivian, and his pretty Indian wife, +who had tattoo marks on her forehead, made much of us, and gave us +coffee. They had an orchard of guavas, and there, for it was long since +I had tasted fruit, I was an immoderate thief, in spite of a pet +curassow which followed me through the garden with distracting pecks. +The Rio Jaci-Parana, a blackwater stream, opened up soon after we left +the sitio. The boundary between the clay-coloured flood of the Madeira +and the dark water of the tributary was straight and distinct. From a +distance the black water seemed like ink, but we found it quite clear +and bright. The Jaci is not an important branch river, but it was, at +this period of the rains, wider than the Thames at Richmond, and without +doubt very much deeper. The appearance of the forest on the Jaci was +quite different from the palisades of the parent stream. On the Madeira +there is commonly a narrow shelf of bank, above which the jungle rises +as would a sheer cliff. The Jaci had no banks. The forest was deeply +submerged on either side, and whenever an opening showed in the woods we +could see the waters within, but could not see their extent because of +the interior gloom. The outer foliage was awash, and mounted, not +straight, but in rounded clouds. For the first time I saw many vines and +trees in flower, presumably because we were nearer the roof of the +woods. One tree was loaded with the pendent pear-shaped nests of those +birds called "hang nests," and scores of the beauties in their black and +gold plumage were busy about their homes, which resembled monstrous +fruits. Another tree was weighted with large racemes of orange-coloured +blossoms, but as the launch passed close to it we discovered the blooms +were really bundles of caterpillars. The Jaci appeared to be a haunt of +the alligators, but all we saw of them was their snouts, which moved +over the surface of the water out of our way like rubber balls afloat +and mysteriously propelled. I had a sight, too, of that most regal of +the eagles, the harpy, for one, well within view, lifted from a tree +ahead, and sailed finely over the river and away. + +That night I slept again in my old hut at the Jaci camp, and with Hill +and another official set off early next morning for the construction +camp on Rio Caracoles, which we hoped to reach before the commissary +train left for Porto Velho. At Porto Velho the "Capella" was, and I +wished, perhaps as much as I have ever wished for anything, that I +should not be left behind when she departed. I knew she must be on the +point of sailing. + +My two companions had reasons of their own for thinking the catching of +that train was urgently necessary. In our minds we were already settled +and safe in a waggon, comfortable among the empty boxes, going back to +the place where the crowd was. But still we had some way to ride; and, I +must tell you, I was now possessed of all I desired of the tropical +forest, and had but one fixed idea in my dark mind, but one bright star +shining there; I had turned about, and was going home, and now must +follow hard and unswervingly that star in the east of my mind. The +rhythmic movements of the mule under me--only my legs knew he was +there--formed in my darkened mind a refrain: get out of it, get out of +it. + +And at last there were the huts and tents of the Caracoles, still and +quiet under the vertical sun. No train was there, nor did it look a +place for trains. My steamer was sixty miles away, beyond a track along +which further riding was impossible, and where walking, for more than +two miles, could not be even considered. The train, the boys told us +blithely, went back half an hour before. The audience of trees regarded +my consternation with the indifference which I had begun to hate with +some passion. The boys naturally expected that we should take it in the +right way for hot climates, without fuss, and that now they had some new +gossip for the night. But they should have understood Hill better. My +tall gaunt leader waved them aside, for he was a man who could do +things, when there seemed nothing that one could do. "The terminus or +bust!" he cried. "Where's the boss?" He demanded a handcart and a crew. +I thought he spoke in jest. A handcart is a contrivance propelled along +railway metals by pumping at a handle. The handle connects with the +wheels by a crank and cogs through a slot in the centre of the platform, +and you get five miles an hour out of it, while the crew continues. For +sixty miles, in that heat, it was impossible. Yet Hill persisted; the +cart was put on the metals, five half-breeds manned the pump handle, +three facing the track ahead, two with their backs to it. We three +passengers sat on the sides and front of the trolley. Away we went. + +The boys cheered and laughed, calling out to us the probabilities of our +journey. We trundled round a corner, and already I had to change my +cramped position; fifty-eight miles to go. We sat with our legs held up +out of the way of the vines and rocks by the track, and careful to +remember that our craniums must be kept clear of the pump handle. The +crew went up and down, with fixed looks. The sun was the eye of the last +judgment, and my lips were cracked. The trees made no sign. The natives +went up and down; and the forest went by, tree by tree. + +My tired and thoughtless legs dropped, and a thorn fastened its teeth +instantly in my boots, and nearly had me down. The trees went by, one by +one. There was a large black and yellow butterfly on a stone near us. I +was surprised when no sound came as it made a grand movement upwards. +Then, in the heart of nowhere, the trolley slackened, and came to a +stand. We had lost a pin. Half a mile back we could hardly credit we +really had found that pin, but there it was; and the men began to go up +and down again. Hill got a touch of fever, and the natives had changed +to the colour of impure tallow, and flung their perspiration on my face +and hands as they swung mechanically. The poor wretches! We were done. +The sun weighed untold tons. + +But the sun declined, some monkeys began to howl, and the sunset tempest +sprang down on us its assault, shaking the high screens on either hand, +and the rain beat with the roll of kettle-drums. Then we got on an up +grade, and two of the spent natives collapsed, their chests heaving. So +I and the other chap stood up in the night, looked to the stars, from +which no help could be got, took hold of the pump handle like gallant +gentlemen, and tried to forget there were twenty miles to go. Away we +went, jog, jog, uphill. I thought that gradient would not end till my +heart and head had burst; but it did, just in time. + +We gathered speed on a down grade. We flew. Presently the man with the +fever yelled, "The brake, the brake!" But the brake was broken. The +trolley was not running, but leaping in the dark. Every time it came +down it found the metals. A light was coming towards us on the line; and +the others prepared to jump. I could not even see that light, for my +back was turned to our direction, and I could not let go the flying +handle, else would all control have gone, and also I should have been +smashed. I shut my eyes, pumped swiftly and involuntarily, and waited +for doom to hit me in the back. The blow was a long time coming. Then +Hill's gentle voice remarked, "All right, boys, it's a firefly." + +... I became only a piece of machinery, and pumped, and pumped, with no +more feeling than a bolster. Shadows undulated by us everlastingly. I +think my tongue was hanging out.... + +Lights were really seen at last. Kind hands lifted us from the engine of +torture; and I heard the remembered voice of the Skipper, "Is he there? +I thought it was a case." + + * * * * * + +That night of my return a full moon and a placid river showed me the +"Capella" doubled, as in a mirror, and admiring the steamer's deep +inverted shape I saw a heartening portent--I saw steam escaping from the +funnel which was upside down. A great joy filled me at that, and I +turned to the Skipper, as we strode over the ties of the jetty. "Yes. We +go home to-morrow," he said. The bunk was super-heated again by the +engine room, but knowing the glad reason, I endured it with pleasure. +To-morrow we turned about. + +Yet on the morrow there was still the persistence of the spacious +idleness which encompassed us impregnably, beyond which we could not go. +The little that was left of the fuel in the holds went out of us with +dismal unhaste. The Skipper and the mates fumed, and the Doctor took me +round to see the "Capella's" pets, so that we might fill up time. A +monkey, an entirely secular creature once with us, had died while I was +away. It was well. He had no name; Vice was his name. There were no +tears at his death, and Tinker the terrier began to get back some of his +full and lively form again after that day when, in a sudden righteous +revolution, he slew, and barbarously mangled, the insolent tyrant of the +ship. The monkey had feared none but Mack, our red, blue and yellow +macaw, a monstrous and resplendent fowl in whose iron bill even Brazil +nuts were soft. + +But we all respected Mack. He was the wisest thing on the ship. If an +idle man felt high-spirited and approached Mack to demonstrate his +humour, that great bird gave an inquiring turn to its head, and its +deliberate and unwinking eyes hid the rapid play of its prescient mind. +The man stopped, and would speak but playfully. Nobody ever dared. + +When Mack first boarded the ship, a group of us, gloved, smothered him +with a heavy blanket and fastened a chain to his leg. He knew he was +overpowered, and did not struggle, but inside the blanket we heard some +horrible chuckles. We took off the blanket and stood back expectantly +from that dishevelled and puzzling giant of a parrot. He shook his +feathers flat again, quite self-contained, looked at us sardonically and +murmured "Gur-r-r" very distinctly; then glanced at his foot. There was +a little surprise in his eye when he saw the chain there. He lifted up +the chain to examine it, tried it, and then quietly and easily bit it +through. "Gur-r-r!" he said again, straightening his vest, still +regarding us solemnly. Then he moved off to a davit, and climbed the +mizzen shrouds to the top-mast. + +When he saw us at food he came down with nonchalance, and overlooked our +table from the cross beam of an awning. Apparently satisfied, he came +directly to the mess table, sitting beside me, and took his share with +all the assurance of a member, allowing me to idle with his beautiful +wings and his tail. He was a beauty. He took my finger in his awful bill +and rolled it round like a cigarette. I wondered what he would do to it +before he let it go; but he merely let it go. He was a great character, +magnanimously minded. I never knew a tamer creature than Mack. That +evening he rejoined a flock of his wild brothers in the distant +tree-tops. But he was back next morning, and put everlasting fear into +the terrier, who was at breakfast, by suddenly appearing before him with +wings outspread on the deck, looking like a disrupted and angry rainbow, +and making raucous threats. The dog gave one yell and fell over +backwards. + +We had added a bull-frog to our pets, and he must have weighed at least +three pounds. He had neither vice nor virtue, but was merely a squab in +a shady corner. Whenever the dog approached him he would rise on his +legs, however, and inflate himself till he was globular. This was +incomprehensible to Tinker, who was contemptuous, but being a little +uncertain, would make a circuit of the frog. Sitting one day in the +shadow of the box which enclosed the rudder chain was the frog, and we +were near, and up came Tinker a-trot all unthinking, his nose to the +deck. The frog hurriedly furnished his pneumatic act when Tinker, who +did not know froggie was there, was close beside him, and Tinker snapped +sideways in a panic. Poor punctured froggie dwindled instantly, and +died. + +I could add to the list of our creatures the anaconda which was found +coming aboard by the gangway but that a stoker saw him first, became +hysterical, and slew the reptile with a shovel; there were the coral +snakes which came inboard over the cables and through the hawse pipes, +and the vampire bats which frequented the forecastle. But they are +insignificant beside our peccary. I forgot to tell you the Skipper never +made a tame creature of her. She refused us. We brought her up from the +bunkers where first she was placed, because the stokers flatly refused +her society in the dark. She was brought up on deck in bonds, snapping +her tushes in a direful way, and when released did most indomitably +charge all our ship's company, bristles up, and her automatic teeth +louder and more rapid than ever. How we fled! When I turned on my +vantage, the manner of my getting there all unknown, to see who was my +neighbour, it was my abashed and elderly captain, who can look upon sea +weather at its worst with an easy eye, but who then was striving +desperately to get his legs (which were in pyjamas) ten feet above the +deck, in case the very wild pig below had wings. + +After the peccary was released we could not call the ship ours. We crept +about as thieves. It was fortunate that she always gave warning of her +proximity by making the noise of castanets with her tusks, so that we +had time to get elevated before she arrived. But I never really knew how +fast she could move till I saw her chase the dog, whom she despised and +ignored. One morning his valiant barking at her, from a distance he +judged to be adequate, annoyed her, and she shot at him like a +projectile. Her slender limbs and diminutive hooves were those of a +deer, and they became merely a haze beneath her body, which was a flying +passion. The terrified dog had no chance, but just as she closed with +him her feet slipped, and so Tinker's life was saved. + +Her end was pitiful. One day she got into the saloon. The Doctor and I +were there, and saw her trot in at one door, and we trotted out at +another door. Now, the saloon was the pride of the Skipper; and when the +old man tried to bribe her out of it--he talked to her from the open +skylight above--and she insulted him with her mouth, he sent for his +men. From behind a shut door of the saloon alley way we heard a fusilade +of tusks in the saloon, shrieks from the maddened dog, uproar from the +parrots, and the hoarse shouts of the crew. The pig was charging ten +ways at once. Stealing a look from the cabin we saw the boatswain appear +with a bunch of cotton waste, soaked in kerosene, blazing at the end of +a bamboo, and the mate with a knife lashed to another pole. The peccary +charged the lot. There broke out the cries of Tophet, and through chaos +champed insistently the high note of the tusks. She was noosed and +caged; but nothing could be done with the little fury, and when I peeped +in at her a few days later she was full length, and dying. She opened +one glazing eye at me, and snapped her teeth slowly, game to the end. + + * * * * * + +_March 6._--It was reported at breakfast that we sail to-morrow. The +bread was sour, the butter was oil, the sugar was black with flies, the +sausages were tinned and very white and dead, and the bacon was all fat. +And even the awning could not keep the sun away. + +_March 7._--We got the hatches on number four hold. It is reported we +sail to-morrow. + +_March 8._--The ship was crowded this night with the boys, for a last +jollification. We fired rockets, and swore enduring friendships with +anybody, and many sang different songs together. It is reported that we +sail to-morrow. + +_March 9._--It is reported that we sail to-morrow. + +_March 10._--The "Capella" has come to life. The master is on the +bridge, the first mate is on the forecastle head, the second mate is on +the poop, and the engineers are below. There are stern and minatory +cries, and men who run. At the first slow clanking of the cable we +raised wild cheers. The ship's body began to tremble, and there was +thunder under her counter. We actually came away from the jetty, where +long we had seemed a fixture. We got into mid-stream--stopped; slowly +turned tail on Porto Velho. There was old man Jim, diminished on the +distant jetty, waving his hat. Porto Velho looked strange again. Away we +went. We reached the bend of the river, and turned the corner. There was +the last we shall ever see of Porto Velho. Gone! + +The forest unfolding in reverse order seemed brighter, and all would +have been quite well, but the fourth engineer came up from his duty, and +fell insensible. He was very yellow, and the Doctor had work to do. Here +was the first of our company to succumb to the country. + + * * * * * + +There were but six more days of forest; for the old "Capella," empty and +light as a balloon, the collisions with the floating timber causing +muffled thunder in her hollow body, came down the swift floods of the +Madeira and the Amazon rivers "like a Cunarder, at sixteen knots," as +the Skipper said. And there on the sixth day was Para again, and the sea +near. Our spirits mounted, released from the dead weight of heat and +silence. But I was to lose the Doctor at Para, for he was then to return +to Porto Velho, having discharged his duty to the "Capella's" company. +The Skipper took his wallet, and we went ashore with him, he to his +day-long task of clearing his vessel, and we for a final sad excursion. +Much later in the day, suspecting an unnameable evil was gathering to my +undoing, I called at the agent's office, and found the Skipper had +returned to the ship, that she was sailing that night, and, the +regulations of Para being what they were, it being after six in the +evening I could not leave the city till next morning. My haggard and +dismayed array of thoughts broke in confusion and left me gibbering, +with not one idea for use. Without saying even good-bye to my old +comrade I took to my heels, and left him; and that was the last I saw of +the Doctor. (Aha! my staunch support in the long, hot and empty time at +the back of things, where were but trees, bad food, and a jest to brace +our souls, if ever you should see this--How!--and know, dear lad, I +carried the damnable regulations and a whole row of officials, the Union +Jack at the main, firing every gun as I bore down on them. I broke +through. Only death could have barred me from my ship and the way home.) + +Next morning we were at sea. We dropped the pilot early and changed our +course to the north, bound for Barbados. Though on the line, the +difference in the air at sea, after our long enclosure in the rivers of +the forest, was keenly felt. And the ship too had been so level and +quiet; but here she was lively again, full of movements and noises. The +bows were at their old difference with the skyline, and the steady wind +of the outer was driving over us. Before noon, when I went in to the +Chief, my crony was flat and moribund with a temperature at 105 deg., and he +had no interest in this life whatever. I had added the apothecary's +duties to those of the Purser, and here found my first job. (Doctor, I +gave him lots of grains of quinine, and lots more afterwards; and plenty +of calomel when he was at 98 again. Was that all right?) + +The sight of the big and hearty Chief, when he was about once more, +yellow, insecure, and somewhat shrunken, made us dubious. Yet now were +we rolling home. She was breasting down into a creaming smother, the +seas were blue, and the world was fresh and wide all the way back. There +was one fine night, as we were climbing slowly up the slope of the +globe, when we lifted the whole constellation of the Great Bear, the +last star of the tail just dipping below the seas, straight over the +"Capella's" bows, as she pitched. Then were we assured affairs were +rightly ordered, and slept well and contented. + + * * * * * + +Late one afternoon we sighted Barbados. The sea was dark and the light +was golden. The island did not look like land. It was a faint but +constant pearl-coloured cloud. The empty sky came down to the dark sea +in bright walls which had but a bloom of azure. Overhead it was day, but +the sea was fluid night. Above the island was a group of cirrus, turned +to the setting sun like an audience of intent faces. Near to starboard +was a white ship, fully rigged, standing towards the island with royals +set, and even a towering main skysail. Tall as she was, she looked but a +multiple cloud which had dropped from the sky, and had settled on the +dark sea, and over it was drifting in a faint air, buoyant, but unable +to lift. We overhauled that stately ship. She was reflecting the dayfall +from the white rounds of her many sails. She was regal, she was +paramount in her world, and the sun seemed to be watching her, and +shining solely for her illustrious progress. The clarity and the peace +of it was in us as we leaned against the rail, watching Barbados grow, +and watching that exalted ship. "This is all right," said the Chief. + +We were coming to the things we knew and understood. In the island near +us were men, quays, and shops. This evening had a familiar and friendly +look. Barbados at last! There would be something to eat, too, and we +kept talking of that. Do you know what good bread and butter tastes +like? Or mealy baked potatoes? Or fruit from which the juice runs when +you bite? Or crisp salads? Not you; not if you haven't lived for long on +tinned stuffs, bread which smelt like vinegar, and butter to which a +spoon had to be used. + +To the door of the saloon alley way we saw the steward come, and begin +to swing his bell. "Tea ho!" said the mate. "Keep it," said the Chief. +"I know it. Sardines and hash. Not for me. We shall get some grub in the +morning. Oranges and bananas, boys. I'm tired of oil. My belt is in by +three holes." + +When the sun once touched the sea it sank visibly, like a weight. Night +came at once. We passed a winking light, and soon ahead of us in the +dark was grouped a multitude of lower stars. That was Bridgetown. Those +stars opened and spread round us, showing nothing of the wall of night +in which they were fixed. Well, there it was. We could smell the good +land. We should see it in the morning. We had really got there. + +The engines stopped. There was a shout from the steamer's bridge and a +thunderous rumbling as the cable ran out, and then a remarkable quiet. +The old man came sideways down the bridge ladder with a hurricane lamp, +and stood with us, striking a light for his cigar. "Here we are, Chief," +he said. "What about coals in the morning?" The night was hot, there was +no wind, and as we sat yarning on the bunker hatch another cluster of +stars moved in swiftly together, came to a stand near us, and a +peremptory gun was fired. That was the British mail steamer. + +We looked at her with awe. We could see the toffs in evening dress +idling in the glow of her electric lights. What a feed they had just +finished! But the greatest wonder of her deck was the women in white +gowns. We could hear the strange laughter of the women, and listened for +it. That was music worth listening to. Our little mob of toughs in turns +used the night glasses on those women, and in a dead silence. There were +some kiddies, too. + +We were looking at the benign lights of the island and trying to make +out what they meant. The sense of our repose, and the touch of those +warm and velvet airs, and the scent of land, were like the kindness and +security of home. "I know this place," drawled Sandy. "I was here once. +Before I went into steam I used to come out to the islands, when I was a +young 'un. I made two voyages in the 'Chocolate Girl.' She was my first +ship. She was a daisy, too. Once we lifted St. Vincent twenty-five days +out of Liverpool. That was going, if you like. If old Wager--he was the +old man of the 'Chocolate Girl'--if he could only get a trip in a ship +like this, like an iron street with a factory stack in the middle! But +he can't. He's dead. He had the 'Mignonette,' and she went missing among +the Bahamas. There's millions of islands in the Bahamas. They're north +of this place. You couldn't visit all those islands in a lifetime. + +"If you ask me, some of the islands in these seas are very funny. +There's something wrong about a few of them. They're not down in the +chart, so I've heard. One day you lift one, and you never knew it was +there. 'What's that?' says the old man. 'Can't make that place out.' +Then he reckons he's found new land, and takes his position. He calls it +after his wife, and cables home what he's done. The next thing is a +gunboat goes there and beats about and lays over the spot, but she +doesn't find no island. The gunboat cables home that the merchant chap +was drunk or something, and that he steamed over the spot and got +hundreds of fathoms. They're always so clever, in the navy. But I've +heard some of these islands are not right. You see one once, and nobody +ever sees it again. + +"I knew a man, and he was marooned on one of those islands. He sailed +with me afterwards on one of the Blue Anchor steamers to Sydney. One +time he was on a craft out of Martinique for Cuba. She was a schooner of +the islands, and fine vessels they are. You'll see a lot about us in the +morning. This man's name was Moffat--Bill Moffat. His schooner had a +mulatto for a master, and that nigger was a fool and very superstitious, +by all accounts. They ran short of water, and it's pretty bad if you +fall short of water in these seas. Off the regular routes there's +nothing. You might drift for weeks, and see nothing, off the track. + +"Then they sighted an island. The mulatto chap pretended he knew all +about that island. He said he had been there before. But he was a liar. +It was only a little island, like some trees afloat. They came down on +it, and anchored in ten fathoms and waited for daylight. + +"Next morning some wind freshened off shore, and Moffat takes a nigger +and rows to the beach. There was only a light swell breaking on the +coral, and landing was easy. Moffat told the nigger to stay by the boat +while he took a look round. There was a bit of a coral beach with a pile +of high rocks at the ends of it, like pillars each side of a doorstep. +What was inside the island Moffat couldn't see, because at the back of +the beach was a wood. He said he heard a sound like a bird calling, but +he reckoned there wasn't a soul in that place. The schooner was riding +just off. He turned and was crunching his way up the coral with the idea +of looking for a way inside. He got to the trees, and then heard the +nigger shout in a fright. The black beggar was pushing out the boat. He +got in it too, and began rowing back to the schooner as if somebody was +coming after him. + +"Moffat yelled, and ran down to the surf, but the nigger kept right on. +There was Moffat up to his knees in the water, and in a fine state. The +boat reached the schooner--and now, thinks Moffat, there'll be trouble. +Do you know what happened though? For a little while nothing happened. +Then they began to haul in her cable. She upanchored and stood out. +That's a fact. Bill told me he felt pretty sick when he saw it. He +didn't like the look of it. He watched the schooner turn tail, and soon +she found more wind and got out of sight past the island, close-hauled. +He watched her dance past one of the piles of rocks till there was +nothing but empty sea behind the rock. Then his eye caught something +moving on the rock. Something moved round it out of his sight. He never +saw what it was. He wished he had. + +"Well, he had a pretty bad time. He couldn't find anyone on the island, +in a manner of speaking. But somebody was always going round a corner, +or behind a tree. He caught them out of the tail of his eye. He said it +was enough to get on a man's nerves the way that thing always just +wasn't there, whatever it was. 'Curse the goats,' Bill used to say to +himself. + +"One day Bill was strolling round figuring out what he could do to that +mulatto when he met him again, and then he found a sea cave. He went in. +It was a silly thing to do, because the way in was so low that he had to +crawl. But the cave was big enough inside for a music-hall. The walls +ran up into a vault, and the water came up to the bottom of the walls +nearly all round. The water was like a green light. A bright light came +up through the water, and the reflections were wriggling all over the +rocks, making them seem to shake. The water was like thick glass full of +light. He could see a long way down, but not to the bottom. While he was +looking at it the water heaved up quietly full three feet, and the +reflections on the walls faded. Then he saw the hole through which he +had crawled was gone. 'Now, Bill Moffat, you're in a regular mess,' he +says to himself. + +"He dived for the hole. But he never found that way out, and the funny +thing was he couldn't come to the top again. Bill saw it was a proper +case that time, and no more Sundays in Poplar. He was surprised to find +that the deeper he went the thinner the water was. It was thin and +clear, like electric light. He could see miles there, and down he kept +falling till he hit the bottom with a bang. It scared a lot of fishes, +and they flew up like birds. He looked up to see them go, and there was +the sun overhead, only it was like a bright round of green jelly, all +shaking. Bill found it was dead easy to breathe in water that was no +thicker than air, so he got up, brushed the sand off, and looked round. +A flock of fishes flew about him quite friendly, and as beautiful as +Amazon parrots. A big crab walked ahead, and Bill thought he had better +follow the crab. + +"He came to a path which was marked with shells, and at the end of the +path he saw the fore half of a ship up-ended. While he was looking at +it, somebody pushed the curtains from the hatchway, and came out, and +looked at him. 'Good lord, it's Davy Jones,' said Bill to himself. + +"'Hullo, Bill,' said Davy. 'Come in. Glad to see you, Bill. What a time +you've been.' + +"Moffat said that Davy wasn't a decent sight, having barnacles all over +his face. But he shook hands. 'You're hand is quite cold, Bill,' said +Davy. 'Did you lose your soul coming along? You nearly did that before, +Bill Moffat. You nearly did it that Christmas night off Ushant. I +thought you were coming then. But not you. But here you are at last all +right. Come in! Come in!' + +"Bill went inside with Davy. There was sea junk all over the place. 'I +find these things very handy, old chap,' said Davy to Bill, seeing he +was looking at them. 'It's good of you to send them down, though I don't +like the iron, for it won't stand the climate. See that old hat? It's a +Spanish admiral's. I clap it on, backwards, whenever I want to go +ashore.' + +"So they sat down, and yarned about old times, though Bill told me that +Davy seemed to remember people after everybody else had forgotten them, +which was confusing. 'Oh, yes,' Davy would say, 'old Johnson. Yes. He +used to talk of me in a rare way. He was a dog, was Johnson. I've heard +him, many a time. But he's changed since his ship came downstairs. He's +a better man. He's not so funny as he was.' + +"Then they had a pipe, and after a bit things began to drag. 'Come into +the garden, Bill,' said Davy. 'Come and have a look round.' + +"All round the garden Bill noticed the name-boards of ships nailed up. +Some of the names Bill knew, and some he didn't, being Spanish. 'What do +you think of my collection?' said Davy. 'Ever seen as fine a one? I lay +you never have!' + +"Then they came to a door. 'Come in,' said Davy. 'This is my locker. +Ever heard of my locker?' + +"Bill said it was pretty dark inside. Just light enough to see. But +there was only miles and miles of crab-pots, all set out in rows, with a +label on each. 'What do you think of that lot, Bill?' asked Davy. 'I +shall have to get larger premises soon.' Bill choked a bit, for the +place smelt stale and seaweedy. 'What's in the crab-pots, Davy?' said +Bill. + +"'Souls!' said Davy. 'But there's a lot of trash, though now and then I +get a good one. Here, now. See this? This is a fine one, though I +mustn't tell you where I got it. And people said he hadn't got one. But +I knew better, and there it is.' + +"But Bill couldn't see anything in the pots. He could only hear a +rustling, as if something was rubbing on the wicker, or a twittering. At +last Davy came to a new pot. 'Do you know who's in this one, Bill,' he +said. But Bill couldn't guess. 'Well, Bill, it's your soul, and a poorer +one I never see. It was hardly worth setting the pot for a soul like +that.' Then Davy began to shake the pot, and soon got wild. 'Here, where +the deuce has that soul gone,' he said, and put his ear to the bars. +Then he put the pot down and made a rush at Bill, to get it back; but +Bill jumped backwards, got through the door, ran through the house, +grabbed the admiral's cocked hat, and clapped it on backwards. Then he +shot out of the water at once, and found himself on the rocks outside +the cave, with the cocked hat still on his head. He's kept that hat ever +since, and money wouldn't buy it." + + * * * * * + +When I woke next morning it was like waking to a great occasion. The +tropic sun was blazing outside. The day seemed of a superior quality. An +old negress shuffled by my cabin door, through which was a peep of the +town across the harbour, and she had some necklaces of shells strung on +one skinny black arm and carried a basket of oranges on the other. I +jumped up, and bought all the oranges. A boat came to our gangway and +some of us went ashore. I don't know what a man feels like who is +released one fine day from imprisonment into the stream of his fellows, +but I should think he is first a little stunned, and afterwards becomes +like a child's balloon in a breeze. The people we had met in the Brazils +never laughed; and I myself had always felt that there we had been +watched and followed unseen, that something was there, watching us, +waiting its time, knowing well it could get us before we escaped. + +We were at last outside it and free. The anchorage of Bridgetown seemed +anarchic, after our level sombre experience, for the sea was a green +light, flashing and volatile, with white schooners driving upon it, +negroes shouting and laughing over the bulwarks, or frantically hauling +on the sheets. The rushing water was crowded with leaping boats, all +gaudily painted; and even the sunshine, moving rapidly on quivering +white sails and the white hulls buoyantly swinging, was a kind of +shaking laughter. Our negro boatmen sang as they rowed, when they were +not swearing at other boatmen. The world had got wine in its head. + +We went to the Ice House, and bought English beer. (Oh, the taste of +beer!) In the brisk and sunny streets there were English women, cool, +dainty, a little haughty, their dresses smelling of new linen, and they +were looking in at shop windows. We had got our feet down on home +pavements, and the streets had the newness and sparkle of holiday. "Hi, +cabby!" + +He drove us along coral roads, under cocoanut palms, and there were +golden hills (hills once more!) one way, and on the other hand was a +beach glowing like white fire, with a sea beyond of a blue that was +ultimate, profound, and as tense and as still as rapture. We came to a +hotel where there was stiff napery, with creases in it, on a breakfast +table. There was a silver coffee-pot. There was sweet-smelling and +crusty bread, butter in ice, and new milk. There was a heaped plate of +fruit. There was a crystal jug filled with cold water and sunshine, and +it threw a wavering light on the damask. + +We had some of everything. We ate for more than an hour, steadily. A man +could not have done it alone, and without shame. There was one superior +lady tourist, with grey curls on her cheeks and a face like doom, and +she sent for the manager, and asked if we were to breakfast there again. +She wanted to know. The Chief begged me, as the youngest of the party, +to go over and kiss her. But I pointed out that, seeing where we had +come from, and what we had suffered, it was the plain duty of any really +dear old soul to come over and kiss us on a morning like that. + + * * * * * + +In the afternoon we were aboard again, waiting for the Skipper to return +with the new orders. To what part of the world would the power in +Leadenhall Street now consign us? Sandy thought New Orleans; but we +could rule that out, for there was no cotton just then. Pensacola was +more likely, the Chief said, with a deck cargo of lumber for Hamburg. +That guess made the crowd glum. Winter in the Atlantic, she rolling her +heart out, and the timber that was level with the engine-room casing +groaning and straining at every roll--to dwell on that prospect was to +feel a cold draught out of the Valley of Shadows. + +Two nigger boys were overside, diving for coins. You threw a +coin--Brazil's nickel muck, a handful worth nothing--and it went below +oscillating, as though sentiently dodging the contorted and convulsive +figure of the boy diving after it. The transparency of the fathoms was +that of a denser air. When the sea was still, at the slack of the tides, +this tropic anchorage was not like water. You did not look upon it, but +into it, being hardly aware of its surface. It was surprising to see our +massive iron plates stand upright in it. We were still an ugly black +bulk, as we were on the ditch water of Swansea, but our sea wagon had +lost its look of squat heaviness. Even our iron ship was transmuted, +such was the lift and radiance of Barbados and its sea, into the +buoyancy of the unsubstantial stuff of that scene about us, the low +hills of greenish gold so delicate under the sky of malachite blue that +you doubted whether mortals could walk there. Bridgetown was between +those hills and the sea, a cluster of white cubes, with inconsequential +touches of scarlet, orange, and emerald. Beneath our keel was a boy who +might have been flying there. + +On one side of the town was a belt of coral beach. It was a-fire, and +the palms above the beach, with their secretive villas, and the +green-gold hills beyond, floated on that white glow. The sea below the +beach was an incandescent green; it might have been burning through +contact with the island. Then the sea spread down to us in areas of +opaque violet and blue, till in the neighbourhood of the ship it became +transparent and was but a denser atmosphere. You, in the hard and bitter +north, on the exposed summit of the world where Polaris glitters in the +forehead of a frozen god, hardly know what young and luscious stuff this +earth is, where the constant sun and tepid rains and salt air have +preserved its bloom and flush of abounding life. + +There came the Skipper's boat, he in his shore-going white ducks and +Panama hat in the stern sheets, his wallet in his hand. He knew that we +all looked at him with assumed indifference, when he stepped among us on +deck. That was his time to show he was the ship's master. He feigned +that we were not there. He turned to the chief mate: "All ready, Mr. +Brown?" "All ready, sir." Then the master walked slowly, knowing our +eyes were on his back, to his place aft, first going in to speak to the +Chief. The Chief came out some minutes after. "Tampa, boys," said he. +"Florida for phosphate, then home." + +That evening we were on our way, and turned inwards through the line of +the Caribbees, passing between the islands of St. Lucia and St. Vincent, +high purple masses of rock, St. Lucia's mass ascending into cones. The +Skipper had been to most of the West Indian islands, and remembered +them, while I listened. We stood at the chart-room door, watching the +islands across the evening seas. The sun, just above the sharply dark +rim of ocean, touched the sea, and sank. A thin paring of silver moon +had the sky to itself. I went into the chart-room; and the old man who, +grim and sour as you might think him, mellows into confidential +friendliness when he has you to himself, spread his charts of the +Spanish Main under the yellow lamp, which was a slow pendulum as she +rolled, and he put his spectacles on his lean brown face, talked of +unfrequented cays, and of the negro islands, and debated which route we +should take. + +The fourth morning at breakfast-time, was a burning day, with a sky +almost cloudless, and a slow sea which had the surface of its rich blue +deeps shot with turquoise lights, while fields of saffron gulfweed +stained it; and we had, close over our port bow, the most beautiful +island in the world. It is useless to deny it, and to declare you know a +better island. Can't I see Jamaica now? I see it most plain. It descends +abruptly from the meridian, pinnacles and escarpments trembling in the +upper air with distance and delicate poise, and comes down in rolling +forests and steep verdant slopes, where facets of bare rock glitter, to +more leisurely open glades and knolls; and then, being not far from the +sea, drops in sheer cliffs to where the white combers pulse. It is a +jewel which smells like a flower. The "Capella" went close in till Port +Antonio under the Blue Mountains was plain, and though I could see the +few scattered houses, I could not see the narrow ledges where men could +stand in such a steep land. We crawled over the blue floor in which that +sea mountain is set, and cruised along, feeling very small, under the +various and towering shape. For long I watched it, declaring continually +that some day I must return. (And that is the greatest compliment a +traveller on his way home can pay to any spot on earth.) + +It faded as we drew northwards. Over seas to the north was a long low +stratum of permanent cloud, and beneath it was the faint presentiment of +Cuba. Still we were in the spell of the very halcyon weather of old +tales, with the world our own, though once this day there was a great +rain burst, and the "Capella" was lost in falling water, her syren +blaring. We neared the Cuban coast by the Isle of Pines, a pallid desert +shore, apparently treeless and parched. The next morning we came to the +western cape of the island, rounding it in company with a white island +schooner, its crew of toughs watching us from her shadeless deck; and +changed our course almost due north. + +Now we were in the Gulf of Mexico, and soon upset its notoriously +uncertain temper, for a "norther" met us and piped till it was a full +gale, end-on, and it kicked up a nasty sea which flung about the empty +"Capella" like a band-box. There was a night of it. Towards morning it +eased up, and I woke to a serene sunrise, and found we were in the pale +green water of coral soundings, with the Floridan pilot even then +standing in to us, his tug bearing centrally on its bridge a gilded +eagle with rampant wings. In a little while we were fast to the +quarantine quay at Mullet Island, detained as a yellow fever suspect. +The medical officers boarded us, ranged amidships the "Capella's" crowd +from the master down, and put in the mouth of each of us a thermometer; +and so for a time we stood ridiculously smoking glass cigarettes. One +stoker was put aside, for he had a temperature. Then into the cabins, +and the saloon, the forecastle, and into the holds, were put gallipots +of burning sulphur, and the doors were closed. We became a great and +dreadful stench; and I went ashore. + +There was a deserted beach of comminuted shells, its glare as bright as +snow in sunshine. It was littered with the relics of old wrecks, with +sea rubbish, and the carapaces of crabs. Beyond the beach was a +calcareous desert, with a scrub of palmetto and evergreen, and patches +of flowering coreopsis and blue squills. Hidden by the scrub were +shallow lagoons. It is hard to tell the sea from the land in warm and +aqueous Florida, for sea and land so invade each other's dominions. +Water and land were asleep in the sun. I was alone in the island, and +sat in a decaying boat by the shore of a lagoon where nothing moved but +the little crabs playing hide and seek in the moist crevices of the +boat, and the pelicans which sat round the interminable flat shores. +Sometimes the pelicans woke, and yawned, and fanned the heat with great +slow wings. + +In the early afternoon we were allowed to proceed to Tampa, which we +reached in three hours; and there we came once more to the press of the +busy and indifferent world. The muddle of roofs and steeples of a great +city were about us, and men met us and talked to us, but they had no +leisure for interest in the wonders of the strange land from which we +had come, and would not have cared if afterwards we were going to +Gehenna. We made fast under a new structure of timber and iron which was +something between a flour mill and the Tower of Babel, for it was wan +and powdered, and full of strange noises; and it had a habit of eating, +in a mechanical way, an interminable length of railway trucks, wagon +after wagon, one every minute. A great weariness and yearning filled me +that night. The strangulating fumes of the sulphur clung to all the +cabin, and puffed in clouds from the pillow when I changed sides; for +the wagons clanked and banged till daylight. I sat up and beat my +breast, and swore I would leave her and go home. The next morning that +inexplicable structure beside us began from many mouths to vomit floods +of powdered phosphate into us, and the "Capella," in and out, turned +pale through an almost impalpable dust. Everybody took bronchitis and +cursed Tampa and its phosphate. + +I spoke to the Skipper and the Chief about it, and they agreed that +nobody would stop with her now, who could leave her; but that yet was I +no pal to desert them. What about them? They had yet to see her safe +across the most ruthless of seas at a time when its temper would be at +its worst; and what about them? Though they admitted that, were they in +my case, they would certainly take the train to New York, and catch +there the fastest steamer for England. Then come with me to the British +Consul like an honest man, said I to the captain, and get me off your +articles. + +The three of us left her, I for the last time. I turned upon the +"Capella," and the boys stood leaning on her taffrail watching me; and I +am not going to put down here what I felt, nor what the lads cried to +me, nor what I said when I stood beneath her counter, and called up to +them. We came to a corner by a warehouse, and I turned to look upon the +"Capella" for the last time. + +Tampa, the noisy city about us, was rawly new, most of its site but +lately a shallow lagoon, and one of its natives, the ship's agent who +was entertaining us at lunch, did not fail to impress that enterprise +and industry upon us with great earnestness. Tampa was a large, hasty, +makeshift standing of depots, railway sidings, cigar factories, wharves, +and huge elevators which could load I forget how many thousands of tons +of bulk cargo into a steamer in twelve hours, as though she were an iron +bucket under a pump. A town spontaneous unexpected and complete, with a +hurrying population in its sidewalks, pushing to secure foothold in +life, and not a book-shop there, and no talk but in its saloons and +commercial exchanges. We went into many of those saloons, the Skipper, +and the Chief, and the late Purser, shaking hands for the last time in +each, and then dropping into another to recall old affairs; and shaking +hands finally again, and so to the next bar. + +That night I was alone in Tampa, with a torrent of urgent affairs +surging past. I could not find the railway station. Standing at a +corner, outside a tobacconist's shop, a huge corridor train shaped among +the lights of the street, trundled down the centre of the roadway, then +edged close to the sidewalk, bumping past a row of shops as casually as +a tram for a penny journey, and stopped just where I stood with a +hand-bag wondering how I was to get to New York. New York was a thousand +miles away. The train was but a mere episode of the open street, and I +could not feel it bore out the promise of my railway vouchers. This +train, a row of lighted villas in motion, came down the roadway, out of +nowhere, while carts and women with market baskets waited for it to +pass, stopped outside a tobacconist's shop, and the light of the shop +window illuminated a round of a huge wheel which stood higher than my +head. The wheel came to rest upon an abandoned newspaper. A negro was +passing me, and I stopped him. "Noo Yark? Step aboard right now!" His +word was all I had to go upon that this train would take me to the +precise point in a continent I did not know. A struggle for existence +eddied fiercely round the train, and assuming it was the right train, +and I missed it--it was an unbearable thought! The train had to be +mounted. It was like climbing a wall; but I would have cast my luggage, +scaled more than walls, and dealt conclusively with any obstruction if +the way home left me no other choice. The traveller who has been in the +wilds and has lived with the barbarous, though he has not allowed his +thoughts to look back there, yet he knows something of that eagerness +which dumb things feel when he turns about. I took my train on trust, as +one does so many things in the United States, found we should really get +to New York, in time, and lay listening to the beat of the flying wheels +beneath my berth; tried to count their pulse, and fell asleep. + +There were some more days and nights, and all the passengers of the +earlier stages of the journey had passed away. Then the train slowed +through imperceptible gradations, and stopped. I thought a cow was on +the line. But the negro attendant came to me and told me to get out. +This was New York. Outside there was a street in the rain, the stones +were deep with yellow reflections, and some cabmen stood about in shiny +capes. No majestic figure of Liberty met me. A cab met me, on a rainy +night. + + * * * * * + +It was on one of those huge liners, and the steward told him they would +reach Plymouth in the morning. He was packing up his things in his +cabin. England to-morrow! The things went into his trunks in the lump, +with a compressing foot after each. It did not matter. All the clothes +were in ruins. The only care he took was with the toucans brilliant +skins, the bundle of arrows, the biscuit tins full of butterflies--they +would excite the Boy--and the barbaric Indian ornaments for Miss Muffet +and the Curly Nob; how their eyes would shine. His telegram from +Plymouth would surprise them. They did not know where he was. + +But he knew, when they did not, that there was but one more day to tick +off the calendar to complete the exile. He had turned back that day to +the earlier pages of the diary and found some illuminating entries; +"Gone," or "That's another," were written across some spaces which +otherwise were blank. It was curious that those cryptic entries recalled +the hours they stood for more vividly to his mind than those which had +happenings minutely recorded. He threw the diary into a trunk; the long +job was finished. + +The sunshine all that day was different from the well remembered burning +weight of the tropics. It was a frail and grateful spring warmth, and +the incidence of its rays was happy and illuminating, as though the +light had only just reached the world, and so things looked just +discovered and interesting. A faint silver haze hung upon a pallid sea, +and the slow smooth mounds of water were full of fugitive glints and +flashes. You hardly knew the sea was there. The mist was the luminous +nimbus of a new world, a world not yet fully formed, for it had no +visible bounds. Night came, and a nearly full moon, and the only reality +was the stupendous bulk of the liner. She might have been in the clouds, +herself a dark cloud near the moon, with but rumours of light in the +aerial deeps beneath. It seemed another of the dreams. Would he wake up +presently to the reality of the forest, with the sun blazing on the +enamel of its hard foliage? + +He wanted some assurance of time and space. He would stay on deck till +the first sign came of England. So he leaned motionless for hours on the +rail of the boat-deck, gazing ahead, where the outlook remained as +unshapen as it had since he left home. Far on the port bow appeared the +headlight of a steamer. + +He watched that light. This, then, was no dream sea. Others were there. +But was it a headlight? ... No! + +The Bishop's! England now! + +The steward came again, peeping through his curtain, and said, +"Plymouth, sir!" and turned on the glow lamp, for it was not yet dawn. +There was an early breakfast laid in the saloon; but he went on deck. +The liner had hardly way on her; the water was but uncoiling noiselessly +alongside. There were shapes of hills near, with villas painted on them, +but so bluish and immaterial was all that it might have rippled like the +flat water, being but a flimsy background which could be easily shaken. +The hills drew nearer imperceptibly, grew higher. A touch of real day +gave a hill-top body; and there was a confident shout from somebody +unseen in plain English. The vision grounded and got substance. Not only +home, but spring in Devon. + +From the train window the countryside in the tones and flush of the +renascence absorbed him. He went from side to side of the carriage. What +was most extraordinary was the sparsity and lowness of the trees and +bushes, the fineness of the growth. The outlines of the trees could be +seen, and they crouched so near to the ground and were so very meagre. +The colours were faint enough to be but tinted mists. The biggest of the +trees were manageable, looked like toys. The orderly hedges, the clean +roads, the geometrical patterns of the fields, gave him assurance once +more of order and security. Here was law again, and the permanence of +affairs long decided upon. He closed his eyes, sinking into the cushions +of the carriage as though the arms under him were proved friendly and +could be trusted.... + +The slowing of the train woke him. They were running into Paddington. He +got his feet fair and solid on London before the train stopped, and +looked into the crowd waiting there. A flushed youngster ran towards him +out of a group, then stopped shyly. He caught The Boy, and held him +up.... Here again was the centre of the world. + + THE END + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's The Sea and the Jungle, by H. M. Tomlinson + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SEA AND THE JUNGLE *** + +***** This file should be named 37205.txt or 37205.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/3/7/2/0/37205/ + +Produced by Roger Frank and the Online Distributed +Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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