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authorRoger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org>2025-10-14 20:06:38 -0700
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Conscript 2989, by Irving Crump
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Conscript 2989
+ Experiences of a Drafted Man
+
+Author: Irving Crump
+
+Illustrator: H. B. Martin
+
+Release Date: July 24, 2011 [EBook #36832]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONSCRIPT 2989 ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Roger Frank, Katherine Ward, and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: I summoned “Local Board 163” in Court Martial
+proceedings]
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+ CONSCRIPT 2989
+
+ EXPERIENCES OF A DRAFTED MAN
+
+ ILLUSTRATED BY
+ H. B. MARTIN
+
+ NEW YORK
+ DODD, MEAD AND COMPANY
+ 1918
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+ COPYRIGHT, 1918, BY
+ DODD, MEAD AND COMPANY, INC.
+
+ Service Flag Design on Cover Patented November 6, 1917
+
+ Reproduced by Permission of Annin & Co., Flag Makers, New York
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+ TO
+ MY MOTHER AND FATHER
+
+ and every other Mother and Father, who spend hours wondering about
+ the welfare of their son, this book is dedicated. And with it comes
+ the assurance that life in the big cantonment contains a full
+ measure of real happiness, and that all hardships are mitigated by a
+ sense of humor which develops even in the worst of pessimists. We
+ are contented, for to compensate for the absence of you and all that
+ you mean, comes the knowledge that we are doing everything that
+ brave men and women, the world over, would have us do at times like
+ these. We are doing a man’s work and by the token of the service
+ flag in your window you should know that the days of patched
+ trousers, darned stocking, of toy fire engines, play soldiers, and
+ noisy drums, were not spent in vain.
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+
+
+
+CONSCRIPT 2989
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+Once when I was an enthusiastic freshman (it seems ages ago) I joined a
+Latin society that had for its inspiration the phrase, _forsan haec olim
+meminisse juvabit_.
+
+All I can remember about the society is the motto, and there is nothing
+particularly pleasant about the recollection, either. But somehow
+to-night that fool phrase comes back to me and makes a pessimist of me
+right off. I wonder how pleasant these things are going to be and
+whether I will want to remember them hereafter. Perhaps I won’t have
+much choice. I’ll probably remember them whether I want to or not.
+Already my first eight hours of active service as Conscript 2989 have
+some sharp edges sticking out which I am likely to remember, though many
+of them are far from pleasant.
+
+I am now truly a member of the army of the great unwashed and
+unwashable—no, I take that back. They are washable. I saw a grizzly old
+Sergeant herding four of them out to the washroom this evening. Each of
+them carried a formidable square of yellow soap and a most unhappy
+expression. But the Sergeant looked pleased with his detail.
+
+Never in my wildest flights of fancy can I picture some of these men as
+soldiers. Slavs, Poles, Italians, Greeks, a sprinkling of Chinese and
+Japs—Jews with expressionless faces, and what not, are all about me. I’m
+in a barracks with 270 of them, and so far I’ve found a half dozen men
+who could speak English without an accent. Is it possible to make
+soldiers of these fellows? Well, if muscle and bone (principally bone)
+is what is wanted for material, they have got it here with a vengeance.
+But, then, from the looks of things they have been doing wonders and
+they may make creditable soldiers of them at that. Goodness knows, they
+may even make a soldier out of me, which would be a miracle. Here’s
+hoping.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+I only need to glance back over the page I wrote last night to see how I
+felt. This conscripting must have gotten under my skin a little deeper
+than I thought. I’ll admit I was homesick, and I guess it made me a
+little testy. I think I really should tear that page out and begin over.
+It isn’t exactly fair, and, besides, it doesn’t fulfil the function of a
+diary, anyway, which, I take it, is a record of events and things—not a
+criticism of everybody in general and an opportunity to give vent to
+disagreeable feelings.
+
+[Illustration: Never in my wildest flights of fancy can I picture some
+of these men as soldiers]
+
+From a “close-up” view yesterday may have seemed like a trying day, but
+to-night it looks a lot different and a lot more interesting. I must
+confess that all the “good-byes,” and the bands, and the weeping mothers
+and sweethearts, and the handshakes, and the pompous old turtles (who
+dodged the draft in the Civil War or bought substitutes) who slapped you
+on the back and told you how they wished they were young again, along
+with the arrival of the “Kaiser Kanners,” who unquestionably were
+“kanners” of another variety, and the parade and the Home Guard and the
+dozen and one “Comfort Kits” that every one handed you, and the mystery
+of what was to come, and the scared look on every one’s face, including
+my own, and the vacant feeling in the pit of one’s stomach, superinduced
+by sandwiches and coffee, fudge, oranges and chocolates in lieu of a
+real meal, did get on my nerves.
+
+[Illustration: Every one of them had a fiendish grin on his face]
+
+But, hang it, when I look back we got a great farewell, at that. And the
+local Board did things up mighty well. I find myself possessed of a
+razor, razor strop, wrist watch, two pocket knives, unbreakable mirror,
+drinking cup and a lot of other things that I never expected to own or
+need. I haven’t the remotest idea where many of them came from.
+
+Then there was that long, almost never ending train ride, which seemed
+to be taking me on an unbearable distance from the place I really felt I
+belonged.
+
+And the arrival; all I saw when I tumbled off the train were thousands
+of unpainted buildings and millions of fellows in khaki, and every one
+of them had a fiendish grin on his face as he shouted: “Oh, you rookey.
+Wait, just wait; you’ll get yours! When they bring on the needle. Oh,
+the needle.”
+
+I had a vague idea of what the “needle” might be, but it wasn’t pleasant
+to hear about it from every one I met. But I guess there were a lot of
+fellows who were not quite certain what this threatening “needle” was.
+Foolishly two of them asked one of the Sergeants who met us at the train
+and what they heard in reply to their queries made them paler than they
+were before, if that were possible. Thereafter, for the rest of the
+afternoon and evening, the “needle” was the subject of earnest
+conversation among us all, and the doubts and misgivings about that
+instrument of torture, coupled with a thoroughly good case of
+homesickness on the part of every one of us helped to make a pleasant
+(?) evening. And that most of us worried until far into the night is
+certain. I know I did, and the Italian on my left cried himself to
+sleep, and didn’t try to hide his unhappiness either. Oh, it was a
+delightful evening, all things considered.
+
+Forty-seven of us, all from my own district, came down together, and
+while we remained in one group there was a measure of consolation to be
+had for us all. But our hopes that we would stay together at camp were
+dashed immediately we got off the train. In fact we were so thoroughly
+split up that I managed to get into a squad composed entirely of
+foreigners, and I’m still with them. But the prospects of a change are
+excellent.
+
+Quite as docile as sheep, and just as ignorant, we were marched down one
+camp street after another. My friends of foreign extraction, with due
+regard for anything that looked like a uniform, saluted every one that
+passed, and they were tolerably busy until we were halted outside of our
+present abode, a big two-story, unpainted barracks building.
+
+Here mess kits were served to each of us, and though we did not know the
+combination that unlocked the mysterious looking things, we were glad to
+get them, because they added so much to the dozen and one things we were
+already carrying. Then, completely smothering us, came two tremendous
+horse blankets and a comforter. Those comforters were everything their
+name implies. Not only did they afford warmth, but amusement as well.
+They ranged in shades from baby blue and pink to cerise and lavender,
+and some one with a sense of humour must have distributed them. The
+stout, pudgy, black-haired Italian to my left reposes under the
+voluminous folds of a beautiful pink creation, and across the room sits
+a huge Irishman, with hands as big as hams and shoulders of a giant,
+with a baby blue comforter wrapped about him. Mine is a bewitching old
+rose. But, believe me, it’s there with the quality if it isn’t much on
+looks. I found that out last night.
+
+Then, after the Sergeant showed us where we bunked and where we could
+expect to find something to eat about supper time, every one left us
+severely alone, which was mostly what we wanted, because we all had a
+lot on our mind between homesickness and that blessed “needle.” But
+there was some work to do, such as stuffing mattresses with hay,
+sweeping out the barracks and similar occupations until bed time.
+
+[Illustration: A baby blue comforter wrapped about him.]
+
+Some one, who had evidently heard some weird tales about the punishment
+meted out to those who overslept at camp, brought an alarm clock along
+with him, and the blooming thing went off at 4 A.M. Of course we got up,
+switched the lights on over head, and proceeded to get dressed with that
+resigned now-what-are-you-going-to-do-with-us air.
+
+But dressing was interrupted by a string of the most beautiful cusses I
+ever heard, coming downstairs just in advance of a mighty mad looking
+Sergeant:
+
+“Who in —— tarnation bow-wows has got that —— alarm clock? Pitch it out
+the —— window, and git back to bed.”
+
+It went and we went. But that’s as far as we could go. Thoughts of the
+“needle” and other forms of torture which we were to face in a few short
+hours kept most of us awake until a quarter after five, when every
+officer in camp began to blow letter-carrier whistles. Then we all got
+up and were introduced to some physical exercises guaranteed to stretch
+every muscle in our makeup. I took a cold shower bath after mine, and
+was the object of interest of the entire barracks. Great stuff (I mean
+the shower).
+
+Most of us might have been tolerably happy after that, if it hadn’t been
+for the fact that every man in uniform made some evil suggestion about
+the “needle.” And when they saw us all, white and corpsey looking and
+more or less unsteady on our legs, line up in front of the barracks and
+march off under our Second Lieutenant, the groans and sorry faces they
+feigned were enough to make one’s blood run cold. And then we got the
+“needle.”
+
+[Illustration: An alarm clock went off at 4 A.M.]
+
+I, for one, was disappointed, and so were most of the rest of us. But
+there were a few who didn’t give themselves a chance to be disappointed.
+They promptly fainted: not because of the injection but because of the
+state of their nerves which they all admitted afterward. There were a
+few things about the examination calculated to scare a man to death such
+as the question: “In case you are shot and killed to whom do you wish
+six months’ pay to be sent?” Many of us stammered a bit before
+answering.
+
+[Illustration: Jabbed at the iodine mark and pulled the trigger]
+
+After that we stripped, lined up and started on our way. Then measured,
+marked and finger-printed, we arrived before a physician who stamped a
+quarter section under the left shoulder blade with a sponge covered with
+iodine, while another one scratched the skin on our upper arm to mark
+the acreage to be covered by a vaccination. We moved on to two more
+physicians, and while one dug a hunk out of our arm and inserted vaccine
+in place of the skin removed, the other man, with a villainously long
+hypodermic, jabbed at the iodine mark and pulled the trigger. And now,
+by George, if any one else around here tries to kid me into worrying
+about anything at all, I’m going to talk back proper. They sure had me
+scared stiff and I’ll admit it. Why, hang it, I would rather have had
+typhoid than face that “needle” before I really knew what it amounted
+to. But here I am, with germs variously estimated at from 15,000 to
+250,000 circulating around inside of me, due to said “needle,” and aside
+from a little wooziness in the head, and a sore shoulder, I’m quite
+contented and ready to turn in. Good-night.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+The serum injections of yesterday produced some queer, and in one case
+unfortunate, results. Last night after taps were sounded and lights were
+out, I lay awake a long time in spite of the fact I was very tired.
+
+Couldn’t understand it, and my arm and back were as sore as could be.
+Hour after hour wore on, and I couldn’t get to sleep. Some did, however,
+and I had a regular frog’s chorus of snores to keep me company. I became
+a veritable specialist in snores and wheezes and grunts. Every time I
+heard a new variety I formed mental pictures of the men who probably
+made them.
+
+Then the chorus was interrupted by some one not far from me who called
+out mournfully: “Oh, my back, my back! The needle!” Then in sharper
+tones: “Count off. 1-2-3-4.” I wondered what horrors his overwrought
+nerves were causing him to dream of.
+
+But when I did get to sleep I slept soundly, certainly, for they told me
+this morning that one chap had become seriously ill, and had been
+carried from the barracks to an ambulance and whisked away to the
+hospital sometime during the small hours of the morning. It seems that
+he had an excess of germs circulating around inside of him, due to the
+fact that he did not know enough to move on after the doctor had given
+him the first injection, and the physician, looking only for the nearest
+iodine spot, shot him twice in the same place.
+
+However, I am reasonably certain I’ll sleep to-night all right, for I’ve
+been pulling stumps all day, or rather during the time I wasn’t learning
+to recognize my right foot from my left, and a few other things that
+every man thinks he knows until some one takes the pains to expose his
+ignorance. Oh, I have the qualities of a really capable soldier in me—if
+some one can find them. As an infantryman I’m a much better stump
+puller. I proved that this afternoon. I have a beautiful double handful
+of blisters, not to mention a ruined suit of clothes and hopeless shoes,
+to my credit in this war of exterminating the Hun. I hope we get
+uniforms soon, because if we don’t, I’ll be going about clad in my old
+rose comforter and some summer underclothes.
+
+Stump pulling is rough on clothes, but it certainly is an appetite
+builder. I’ve discovered already that it is good policy to be among the
+first on line with a mess kit, then if you can bolt your beef a-la-mode
+fast enough, and get outside and wash up your kit, you stand a good
+chance of joining the last of the line, thereby getting a second
+helping. Indeed, several fellows have it down to such a science already,
+that they get three helpings before the cook begins to say things.
+
+The barracks is beginning to look picturesque. The atmosphere of a
+western mining camp, arranged for stage purposes, prevails. The
+Italians, swarthy-faced, heavy-featured fellows, for the most part,
+gather in little groups, smoke villainous pipes and play cards
+incessantly, whenever they are allowed much time in the barracks. Our
+Semitic friends linger in the vicinity of the door that leads to the
+mess hall and kitchen, especially about meal time. And their mess kits
+are always handy. Nicknames have already become common, and we have
+among us such worthies as Fat, Doc, Peck’s Bad Boy, Toney, Binkie,
+Shortie, Shrimp, Simp and Pop. The last name has been applied to me,
+inspired, no doubt, by the suggestion of baldness aloft.
+
+[Illustration: Italians gather in little groups]
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+Didn’t sleep much last night, for some reason. Think I was too tired.
+This is the third night I’ve lost time. Beginning to feel it now. But no
+one else seemed to sleep well either, or at least they didn’t go to
+sleep right off. Lights out at ten and all supposed to be “tucked in.”
+Then came various remarks from the darkness; choice, unprintable remarks
+about the Kaiser, the Government, the Sergeant, certain Corporals, who
+doubtless heard all their well-wishers had to say, but could not
+identify the speakers. Indeed, it struck me that the fellows had hit
+upon a choice way of telling certain non-coms what they thought of them,
+without the possibility of getting in bad. Then arguments started in the
+darkness, and the vocal combatants were urged on by catcalls and
+encouraging yells from various sections of the unlighted room, and
+presently shoes started flying.
+
+About that time the Top Sergeant upstairs woke up, and decided to
+investigate. Silence fell in the big room when the stairs, creaking
+under his weight, gave warning that the crusty old veteran of fifteen
+years’ service with the Regulars was on his way down.
+
+[Illustration: The Top Sergeant made the round of the cots]
+
+The door opened and a pocket flashlight began to travel from cot to cot.
+But strangely enough every one was slumbering contentedly, and some even
+snoring. The Top Sergeant made the round of the cots, reached the door
+and “doused his glim.”
+
+Then with a most impressive introduction of profanity he remarked that
+“The next ——, ——, son-of-a-bandmaster, who started anything would spend
+the rest of the night out on the porch in his underclothes,” whereupon
+some wag from the darkness replied: “Put t’ Kaiser out there, he started
+it.” While others sweetly remarked: “Good-night Ser_geant_.” “Pleasant
+dreams, dear.” “Come kiss me good-night.” and “Don’t forget to tuck us
+all in.”
+
+But things eventually subsided and I dozed off, only to be awakened
+later by some one kissing me on the cheek. It was startling to say the
+least, and I sat up. I thought perhaps the Sergeant had come back to say
+good-night. Then it happened again, only this time on my hand, and I
+heard an eager little whine, and a sniff-sniff-sniffing that told me
+plainly a dog was beside my cot.
+
+I chirped encouragingly and up he came. Then he dived between the
+blankets and burrowing deep worked his way down to the foot of my cot.
+Evidently he had slept in army cots before. All my efforts to dislodge
+him were futile and I knew that unless I got up and unmade my bed he
+would not come out. So I left him, and he in gratitude kept my feet
+warm.
+
+This morning he appeared at reveille, waking me up with his frantic
+efforts to dig himself to light again and kissing me good-morning, by
+way of showing his appreciation. He was just a plain yellow dog, with a
+lop ear and a habit of wagging all over when he could not get enough
+expression in his stump of a tail. Attached to a strap that he wore in
+place of a collar was a tag on which was scrawled: “Presented to Local
+Board No. 163—Hold the fort for we are coming.” I concluded that if they
+held onto the fort, when they arrived, as well as they held onto their
+dog it wasn’t worth while having them come at all.
+
+“Local Board No. 163” stood guard on the foot of my bed, or rather, sat
+guard, until I got dressed, and although he created no end of interest
+among the rest of the fellows in the room, who whistled and called to
+him, he refused to leave his new-found “bunkie.” He just sat tight. He
+even stayed when I got up to go, but he looked at me with a most
+reproachful air, as if to say, “I think a lot of you even though you do
+want to leave me.”
+
+He remained after every one had left the room and when I returned an
+hour later to get my mess kit for breakfast, he was still there.
+
+But the rattle of mess tins must have suggested something to him for
+when I got up to go this time he was right beside me, and he even braved
+the crush at the mess-hall door to stick near me.
+
+That dog never had so much to eat in all his young life as he got for
+breakfast that morning. First he visited our Japanese cook, who liked
+him and proved it by giving him a piece of meat. Then he visited the
+kitchen police, who found something for him, after which he made the
+rounds of the mess tables, coming back to me actually bloated with food.
+He looked up at me and I’ll swear he grinned and tried to say: “This is
+the life—eh, Ol’ Top?”
+
+“Local Board No. 163” has already become a favourite, but with all his
+petting from his many well-wishers, he seems to want to call me Boss.
+He’s on the cot beside me now as I write, snoring with disgusting
+impoliteness, but I guess, being just a plain yellow dog, he don’t know
+any better.
+
+This has been a day of visitors, and little work. Early this morning
+they began to arrive. I never saw so many motor cars anywhere, except at
+football games, or the races. And girls; thousands of them, and pretty,
+too. But shucks, I’m outclassed. In fact I began to feel like my dog
+to-day. I’ll admit it was pretty soft for the fellows who had uniforms,
+but for the poor tramps like myself, who still wear their civilian
+clothes (or what is left of them, which isn’t very much all told) it was
+sort of a lonesome day.
+
+[Illustration: Pretty soft for the fellows who had uniforms]
+
+Then there were the lucky fellows who had passes to leave camp. They
+looked fine, tramping down the road toward the station. Of course they
+were all uniformed; they are not allowed to leave camp unless they are.
+
+But “Local Board No. 163” and I take consolation in the fact that
+perhaps next Sunday we will be all spick and span in a nice new uniform,
+and then we’ll strike for a pass, too, and go home and swagger about a
+bit ourselves.
+
+Feeling delightfully tired and sleepy; and I know I’ll “press some of
+the creases out o’ my blankets” to-night. This place seems almost
+comfortable and homelike now, and the men—well I’ve changed my original
+opinion of them considerably. They all (or most of them) have their
+hearts in the right place, and there aren’t so many muckers as I thought
+there might be. In fact I’m beginning to like things mighty well; really
+enjoying myself. Only, hang it, I think I’m getting a good case of
+hives. Haven’t been afflicted thus for about five years. If they keep up
+I’ll report to the hospital shortly. “Come on ‘Local Board No. 163’
+we’ll turn in.”
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+Several things of importance happened to-day. For one thing we got some
+clothes. I say _some_ clothes advisedly, for I’m not all clothed yet,
+being minus such important articles as an undershirt, socks and shoes.
+But those I brought from home, though sanctified and made holey by
+arduous labours in other fields, will do for the present. I possess a
+pair of winter breeches and a summer coat, but what matters that. It is
+sufficient to know that they fit, which is not the case in several
+instances, notably in that of friends Fat and Shrimp, who, I have
+learned, were not optimistic from the first about being fitted properly.
+It seems that from years of experience they have both learned never to
+expect to be fitted anywhere, anyhow. Fat’s shirt covers him with an
+effort, but that is all. He can’t find a shoehorn with which to get into
+his breeches. As for Shrimp: his belt is pulled tight about his chest
+and the sleeves of his tunic are rolled up to where his elbows should
+be, only to disclose the tips of his fingers.
+
+But I must confess to a grave error right here. It startled me this
+evening at retreat. Indeed, several things startled me this evening at
+retreat, including my fast developing case of hives.
+
+[Illustration: His belt is pulled tight about his chest]
+
+A few days ago I made some rather boorish and very sarcastic remarks
+about the possibilities of ever making soldiers out of the men I found
+myself among. I humbly take it all back and eat mud by way of apology.
+Khaki, a campaign hat and a shave, together with a certain amount of
+training in how to stand up straight and step off correctly, have made a
+vast difference. Why, hang it, I’m mighty proud to belong to this
+company. Jews, Italians, Poles, etc., all look like fighters; act like
+fighters; and a lot of them are fighters, too. Why they are soldiers
+already, and glad of it. Which leads me to state quite modestly the
+surprising fact that I think I am nearly a soldier, too, and gol-dinged
+set up about it. Honestly we looked fine this evening. What if there
+were a few misfits? A process of barter and exchange has already
+eliminated a great deal of that (save in the cases of Fat and Shrimp,
+who have gone back to civilian clothes until special uniforms are built
+for them) and when we lined up and snapped to attention while the band
+over on Tower Hill played “The Star Spangled Banner” and the old flag
+came slowly down, we looked like real soldiers every inch. We knew it,
+too, and I’ll bet there wasn’t a prouder company in the entire camp.
+
+[Illustration: Back to civilian clothes until a special uniform is
+built]
+
+Of course, I had to gum up the ceremony. But I guess I’ll pay for it
+to-morrow. Here’s how it happened:
+
+We’ve been drilling, drilling, drilling, all day to-day, drilling with a
+vengeance, and now we can do squads right and right front into line with
+as much pep and vigour as a company of Regulars. Our Sergeant said so,
+which is some admission for the old moss-back to make. Of course, we
+were tired. I was about ready to drop in my tracks when five o’clock
+came, which is time for evening parade or retreat; a very impressive
+ceremony by the way. My hives had been bothering me all day, and every
+time we were at ease, I got in some likely scratches in itchy places.
+
+One beautiful lump developed right under my arm just at five o’clock.
+Holy smokes, how it did itch! It was just as if something had staked an
+oil claim right there and wasn’t losing any time about drilling a well.
+Of course, standing at attention a chap can’t scratch, at least he’s not
+supposed to—but I did. I tried to show extreme fortitude. I stood and
+stood and stood, and the darned thing kept boring and boring and boring.
+Then when the Lieutenants had their backs turned and stood at salute
+while the flag came down, I took a chance and scratched.
+
+That First Lieutenant of ours either has eyes in the back of his head or
+else the Sergeant is a tattletale. Anyhow, after the ceremonies and
+before we were dismissed, I was commanded to step out, whereupon I was
+given a most beautiful call down, after which I said, “thank you, sir”
+to a detail as kitchen police, for the next week to come starting
+to-morrow.
+
+When I got back here to my barracks the first thing I did was to peel
+off my shirt and look for that hive. I caught him. And then the whole
+terrible plot to get me detailed as kitchen policeman was revealed.
+“Local Board No. 163” has fleas; or, rather, he had ’em. I’ve got ’em
+now—no, wrong again. I got rid of them, or I hope I did.
+
+[Illustration: I picked him up in one hand and a cake of yellow soap in
+the other.]
+
+Upon making the hideous discovery, I summoned “Local Board No. 163” in
+court martial proceedings. He was guilty; I could see it by the way his
+spirit sagged in the middle when I began to cross-question him. I picked
+him up in one hand and a cake of yellow soap and a towel in the other,
+and we proceeded toward the shower baths. Bur-r-r-r but that water was
+cold. “Local Board No. 163” didn’t enjoy it either, but I could with
+justice assure him that this form of punishment hurt me as much as it
+did him, and what is more I am likely to suffer a heap worse to-morrow.
+
+“Local Board No. 163,” you sleep _under_ the bed to-night.
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+Too blasted tired to write to-night. I did a whole winter’s work this
+morning. Shovelled nine tons (almost) of coal into the coal bin, as a
+starter. Then peeled a sack of potatoes, scrubbed an acre of floor and a
+half-acre of table tops and benches, washed twenty ash cans, and other
+kitchen utensils and—oh, I’m too tired now, think I’ll wait until
+to-morrow.
+
+“Local Board No. 163” sleeps _out on the porch_ to-night.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+Still kitchen policing. Yesterday I thought I had pulled some job when I
+peeled an ash can full of potatoes, but that was nothing. To-day I got a
+better one. I had to peel the same amount of potatoes, only they were in
+a washboiler this time. Yes, right off the fire. I can’t see why the
+Government has to serve potatoes with the jackets off anyway. Why don’t
+they let the men peel them? They are just as well able to do it as we
+are. If some one ever wants to invent a choice way of punishing
+refractory prisoners in jail I suggest they send said refractors into
+the kitchen and give them the gentle job of peeling hot potatoes, by the
+washboilerful.
+
+I have a side partner on the kitchen police. His name is O’Flynn and he
+runs into even better luck than I do. To-day he shared the job of
+peeling “hot ones” with me. Yesterday while I had the little task of
+peeling ’em raw, he was handed the nice detail of attending to twelve
+pounds of onions; a tearful occasion, until some one with a conscience
+suggested that he get a bucket of water and peel them under water.
+O’Flynn got the water, with the remark that if he waited just a little
+longer the onion pan would have been full of tears, which he assumed
+would have served just as well.
+
+O’Flynn is kitchen policing because he tried to come into the barracks
+after taps. Lights out at ten and O’Flynn arrived about 2 G.M. He
+avoided the fire-guard successfully and went around to the back of the
+barracks. There he jimmied a window with his pocket knife and got it
+opened, only to have it fall on his neck when he was about half-way in.
+By way of exercise he put his elbow through it. Then to add to the
+situation he found himself in the darkened mess hall instead of the
+dormitory, and the noise he made when he knocked over several benches
+naturally grated on the Sergeant’s nerves. Said Sergeant arrived in the
+hall in his union suit about the time O’Flynn had untangled himself,
+and, after cussing him out to perfection, he handed the Irishman a week
+at kitchen policing.
+
+“And now,” said O’Flynn, “t’ next time I come in through t’ windey, I’ll
+stay out.”
+
+A week of this and I’ll be able to qualify as a first rate housekeeper
+for a lumber camp. Already I can lay down a few very necessary rules
+which the average housewife will appreciate, as for instance:—
+
+1. Never take it for granted that a man has only one appetite. We have
+two hundred and seventy men here, but they carry around an aggregate of
+six hundred appetites.
+
+2. Never plunge your hands into an ash can full of greasy water without
+first removing your wrist watch.
+
+3. Never attempt to mop up after your men folk. Just turn the hose on,
+lash the nozzle to a convenient table leg and walk away and forget about
+it.
+
+4. In carrying out a pan full of hot ashes never grab the handle. Thrust
+a stick through it, it saves the temper and the floor.
+
+5. Never let any one kid you into trying to take the black off the
+kitchen pans with sapolio, rather throw the pans away.
+
+[Illustration: Never let anyone kid you into trying to take the black
+off the kitchen pans]
+
+Delightfully brief and entertaining job, that of removing the black from
+ash cans that are used to cook soup in. Our Mess Sergeant, the pirate,
+noticed that for about three seconds during this afternoon I wasn’t
+doing anything in particular, so he gave me a cake of sapolio and a mop
+and told me to get busy and shine up the outside of the pots and pans
+and get all the black off. I went to it and stuck—until our Jap cook,
+the slant-eyed angel, came in about two hours later and told me the
+honourable ash cans always got blacked up again so what’s the use; and
+anyhow he wanted to use the mop. I almost kissed him.
+
+Thank goodness the coal shovelling is all over with. Finished it
+yesterday. To-day during my moments of leisure I split a few cords of
+kindling wood and carried it into the kitchen, but I like splitting wood
+better than heaving coal when it comes to making a choice.
+
+I’ve been very popular with “Local Board No. 163,” since I’ve been in
+the kitchen. Honestly, if that dog had intelligence enough, I could
+almost believe that he induced that flea to start this dirty work, for
+he’s the only one in the whole company who has benefited by it. He hangs
+around the galley all the time and is waxing fat, prosperous and greasy;
+greasy because he got in the way of some dishwater that was being
+emptied out the back door. And now I’ll have to give him another
+scrubbing before we turn in, or he’ll be crawling in under my blankets
+again.
+
+Strange I haven’t received any letters yet. Some chaps are lucky.
+Letters seem to make a big difference in things, even if it’s only
+listening in on some other fellow’s. Every one reads letters out loud so
+that we can all enjoy them, for letters, no matter whom they are from,
+are real events here and one always gets a sinking feeling when he
+discovers there aren’t any for him.
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+Real luck at last. No more kitchen policing, thank goodness. It all
+happened thus:
+
+About the time we had cleaned up the remains of breakfast and I was
+getting ready to turn out for “settin’ ups,” along comes the Captain
+with two Lieutenants in tow, all with official looking papers. We lined
+up and he looked us all over very critically. Then he read:
+
+“Any members of this company qualified to fill the following positions,
+step one pace,” and a list of occupations followed that included
+everything from barber to horse trainer and stage carpenter. Quite a few
+of us stepped out. About ten of the Italian contingent responded at the
+word barber. Fat came forward as stage carpenter, and when he said
+artist I stepped three paces forward instead of one and, saluting,
+handed him my recommendation for the Camouflage Corps. I knew I wasn’t
+doing quite the proper thing. But you see we were all young and innocent
+of such things as military courtesy, and the Captain overlooked the fact
+that one pace didn’t mean three, and after he had mentally debated the
+question of calling me down in front of the company and had given me the
+benefit of inexperience, he read the recommendation.
+
+[Illustration: Fat was looking for the same barracks]
+
+The result was that I was ordered to report immediately to the 2-6
+Company, 5-2 Depot Battalion. And with visions of avoiding physical
+exercises for about two hours and the preparing of a midday meal, I
+needed no urging. I gathered up my bed, hay mattress, blankets and all
+and proceeded to find the barracks of the 2-6 Company, 5-2 Depot
+Battalion.
+
+Of course, it had to be located at the other end of the twenty-four
+square miles of reservation. But I had company. Fat, loaded down like a
+dromedary under bed, blankets, a suitcase and all, was looking for the
+same barracks. So we started on our wanderings together, hopeful of
+finding our new home before dinner was served.
+
+We found it. And we found a lot of other fellows looking for the same
+home. It seems this Depot Battalion, of which I am now a part, is
+composed entirely of specialists, lawyers, linguists, engineers,
+artists, architects, carpenters and what not, and just about the time we
+were being transferred, other specialists were being selected from other
+companies and sent on their way to the Headquarters Divisions of the
+various regiments. So our corner of the camp has been quite popular all
+day, with men staggering in under loads of personal belongings like a
+lot of gipsies looking for new places to hang their O.D’s.
+
+We, I mean Fat and myself, are among a different class of fellows now
+and this moving business has changed my opinion of the camp. From a hit
+or miss proposition as it first appeared, it has become a very
+systematic and well-organized cantonment. It is being worked out like a
+gigantic piece of machinery and there isn’t any question in my mind now
+but that we will all, sooner or later, fit into the places where we will
+be able to serve the Government best. Here I have been trying for months
+to discover how I can get into the Camouflage Corps, which so far as I
+could learn was a mythical organization which no one knew very much
+about. Meanwhile, I have been hoping to keep out of the draft army for
+fear of being side-tracked and given a bayonet, instead of a paint
+brush, to beat the Huns with.
+
+[Illustration: Material for the camouflage unit]
+
+And here I am conscripted, and inside of a week singled out as material
+for the Camouflage unit, with a nice place waiting for me to stay until
+said unit needs me. They are doing it up in really businesslike fashion
+and no doubting it.
+
+But in the shuffle I’ve lost my dog. He’s only been with me a few days
+and he’s done nothing but get me into trouble all the time, yet I miss
+the little beggar. He wasn’t about when I gathered up my belongings this
+morning, and I haven’t had time to look him up all day. Perhaps, before
+taps I’ll wander down to the other barracks and see if I can find him.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+Real work began in earnest here this morning, for the officers in
+command of the various companies of the Headquarters Divisions, or Depot
+Battalions, or whatever it is these particular departments are called,
+are determined to rush our drill instructions as fast as possible,
+because there is no telling when any one or any number of us will be
+needed somewhere else in the U. S. A. or in France, all of which sounds
+promising for a quick change. I’m willing, and I sure hope it’s France.
+
+Our day is just filled full of hay-footing and straw-footing and squads
+righting and all that sort of thing. I am learning things gradually by
+dint of much cussing on the part of our Sergeant, who is also late of
+the Regular, and who certainly has as choice a vocabulary as our former
+drillmaster.
+
+We must have a very capable Mess Sergeant in this barracks, for the
+meals here are mighty good; better than those we received in the other
+barracks. We actually had ice cream and tea this noon, a thing unheard
+of in most of the barracks.
+
+And our cook is a wonder. He’s an old cockney sea-dog, who looks like a
+regular buccaneer, and he has a parrot, too, whom he calls Jock. Jock
+spends most of his time sitting on the edge of the coal bin shrieking
+“Lazy Pig.” But neither Jock nor his master has a sense of humour; the
+cook gets mad when he finds a man trying to ring in a third helping and
+when he gets mad, Jock screams: “Lazy pig, lazy pig,” and dances up and
+down in a frenzy.
+
+[Illustration: Our cook looked like a regular buccaneer.]
+
+I went back to the old barracks last night, to find the place almost
+filled with new men, all worried looking and pale, and much disturbed
+over that first night horror, the “needle.” I didn’t relieve their
+mental anguish a particle, which was most unchristian-like.
+
+Several of the men remaining from the former company told me that most
+of the original company had been split up between the “Suicide Club”
+which is the machine gun companies, the transportation division and the
+infantry. As for “Local Board No. 163” no one had seen him about.
+Possibly he has become disgusted with high-toned individuals who object
+to fleas, and has gone off and joined the infantry. Well I wish him
+luck.
+
+I really believe I’m taking a very deep interest in this soldiering
+after all. I didn’t think I would at first, but now I find I’m watching
+the colour of my hat cord with interest. I want to see it lose its
+newness and get faded-out looking, like a regular soldier’s hat cord.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+On the camp calendar, to-day is marked down as a half-holiday, which is
+another one of the pleasant little jokes they have down here. It is a
+half-holiday. We quit drilling at twelve o’clock. But there is a Sunday
+ceremony they have called inspection and sometimes when the Lieutenant
+wants to leave camp early on Sunday he decides to hold inspection on
+Saturday afternoon.
+
+About twelve o’clock some one reminds some one else that the
+aforementioned ceremony is on the program of weekly events, and thereby
+spoils the whole pleasure for the day. At inspection the Lieutenant
+saunters through the barracks, inspects the beds and the stacks of
+underclothing, socks and similar equipment piled thereon, and if said
+underclothing, etc., do not show signs of recent acquaintance with soap
+and water, almost anything is likely to happen.
+
+And, of course, since no one is systematic about doing washing, all the
+dirty clothing and extra socks pile up until Saturday, and then on the
+half-holiday the scrubbing tables in the rear of the barracks are the
+most popular playgrounds.
+
+The washing process is interesting. Every one lines up and dips into the
+same basin of water. Government soap is supplied in quantities, so are
+the scrubbing brushes. One lays his jeans and undershirt out nice and
+smooth on a long table, pours a basin of water over them, applies the
+soap as if it were a holy-stone until the underclothing is covered with
+a soft yellow scum. And then he spends the rest of the afternoon trying
+to get the soap off. The more lather a chap makes the better washerman
+he is, from all appearances.
+
+The rear of the barracks on a Saturday afternoon looks like a string of
+tenement house backyards, with flapping garments hanging from
+everything, including the electric light wires, and men in various
+degrees of attirement stand around waiting for the garments to get dry.
+Oh, you daren’t leave them and go off on some other mission while the
+wind does its duty. You simply have to stick and keep a careful eye on
+everything you own, otherwise:—well it works on the principle that the
+man who grabs the most is the best-dressed man for the following week,
+and if you are not there to prove ownership you are liable to find a
+pocket handkerchief where your undershirt was and the handkerchief isn’t
+always what it was originally intended to be.
+
+I did manage to get my wash done and gathered up in time to see the last
+ten minutes of a Gaelic football game over on the parade grounds. But
+next week I’m going to take the advice of the Sergeant who suggests that
+I follow the example of Regular Army men and wash each piece as it
+becomes soiled. I wonder if I am systematic enough for that?
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+No I didn’t draw a pass. I’ve been around camp the whole bloomin’ day,
+but there were about fifteen thousand lucky fellows who did draw passes.
+I saw them going down in groups for every train to the city since four
+o’clock yesterday afternoon. But Fat and I seem to be a bit unlucky.
+Poor Fat, he has wanted a pass to get home and see his mother ever since
+he has been here. But a pass wouldn’t do him much good. He hasn’t any
+uniform yet. Still waiting for the army tailors to get busy. I wouldn’t
+be surprised if they shipped him to France with no more Government
+property than a khaki shirt. We’ve been consoling each other most of the
+day. Fat’s a good chap and a mighty likeable fellow.
+
+It has been a day of rest, however, for all except Giuseppi, the
+company’s barber. He has done a tremendous business; shaved every one,
+from the Captain down.
+
+[Illustration: Giuseppi’s methods are unique and interesting]
+
+Giuseppi’s methods are unique and interesting. Somewhere he found two
+planks, which he brought into the dormitory, and, by catching the lower
+ends under the iron work of one cot and propping them against the side
+of another, he contrived an affair that resembles remotely a steamer
+chair. Line forms to the right. Bring your own brush and shaving stick
+and do your own lathering for a quick and effective shave.
+
+I can’t guess how many he shaved. The line stretched the length of the
+dormitory from breakfast to dinner time. The men dabbed their brush into
+a single basin of cold water and moistened their faces while standing in
+line. Then as they moved on they soaped and lathered their own faces and
+rubbed it in thoroughly. And by the time they reached the plank their
+bristles needed only a final application of lather and Giuseppi got busy
+with the razor.
+
+He is a wonder. All he did this morning was strop and shave, strop and
+shave, and at ten cents a head—no I mean face—(twenty cents a head, only
+no hair cut on Sunday) I guess he made a fair week’s wages. As each
+victim left the planks, said victim wiped the remaining lather from his
+face, ears and nose and applied his own talcum powder.
+
+Perhaps Giuseppi’s business was increased by his announcement: “No shava
+for tree days now. To-morrow I getta da needle for twice times. No can
+use my arm vara moch.”
+
+Which reminds me that I am scheduled for my second inoculation
+to-morrow.
+
+I have been discovering some of the unknown who are in our midst.
+Unearthed a popular song writer (whose income before he adopted the
+dollar-a-day job for Uncle Sam was reputed to be $10,000 a year). I
+didn’t unearth him really. He bobbed up this morning, when several of
+the fellows were playing mouth organs, and now, behold, he’s organizing
+a glee club. Then there is a linguist, who is fresh from the biggest
+financial institution in the world where he handled all their French and
+Spanish translation work. He has started a class in French which is in
+session for an hour every evening. We are all _Parlez vous_-ing with
+more or less (mostly more) inaccuracies. But what we lack in accent and
+correct pronunciation we make up for in genuine Parisian gestures. Oh,
+we’re there all right.
+
+Another of our enterprising members is a well-known landscape gardener,
+who, in co-operation with one of our several architects, has organized a
+campaign for a “barracks beautiful,” all of which doesn’t mean very much
+to most of us, but gives them a good opportunity to dispose of their
+spare time. Our afternoons have been spent in pulling stumps in the
+vicinity of the barracks and grading the street and dooryard until now
+no one would ever recognize it for the same place. But the landscape
+gardener has carried the work a bit further and with the assistance of
+several of us, including myself, gone off into the woods and dug up a
+score or more of pine and cedar saplings about five feet high. These
+have been transplanted in the form of a hedge around our barracks, on
+top of a tiny terrace, and they certainly soften the outlines of the
+unpainted building and add a touch of that which is lacking in the
+vicinity of most of the structures.
+
+He, the landscaper, has placed whitewashed stones at conspicuous
+corners, too, and on either side of our tiny porch he has worked out the
+number of the company and the number of the division in concrete
+letters, which the camp orderly scrubs industriously every morning to
+keep them white and presentable. The job of camp orderly, by the way, is
+the worst job a man can be detailed to here, being one degree lower than
+kitchen police; and since I know mighty well the rigours of that, I’m
+going to steer clear of this other form of punishment, if it is humanly
+possible to do so.
+
+The Sunday crop of visitors flocked to camp as usual to-day and I
+entertained several who did not come to see me especially, but who
+brought along such delightful lunch that I felt constrained to show them
+about and be pleasant to them at least while the lunch lasted.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+We were excused from drill this morning for the purposes of being shod
+and getting our second inoculation. Getting our shoes was the most
+interesting and least painful of the two.
+
+After being shot (in the left arm this time) we proceeded to the Q. M.,
+where in one portion of his domain shoes were being issued, two pairs to
+a man, one pair for work and the other for rest and fatigue.
+
+Of course, immediately the fitting began the men started to protest that
+they were insulted by being given shoes too large for them. But that
+didn’t disturb the shoe man, who merely told them to mind their own
+business and he’d take care of their feet, which belonged to the
+Government anyhow.
+
+[Illustration: Each man was loaded with a fifty pound bag of sand.]
+
+Standing on a flat surface in stocking feet, each man was loaded with a
+fifty pound bag of sand. Then when his feet had spread as much as they
+possibly could, measurements were taken from every angle, just exactly
+as if the shoes were to be built especially for the foot they were to
+adorn. The collection of figures was then gone over, and compared with a
+chart, after which two pairs of shoes were found corresponding with the
+dimensions covered by number so-and-so. I’ve forgotten what my number
+is, but I will confess that while the shoes are several sizes larger
+than I would ever think of buying in a shoe store, I have never had
+anything on my feet that gripped my heels and instep and ankles so
+firmly and yet allowed me room enough to wiggle my toes around. The
+dress shoes and the trench brogans of unfinished leather with half-inch
+soles filled with hobs, and steel plated heels, feel more comfortable
+than any shoes I have ever owned, and I gratefully accepted the two
+pairs issued to me and left for my quarters.
+
+[Illustration: “I like t’ geev da Kais a keek in da face wid-a dose
+shoes”]
+
+On my way up the road I passed an Italian who seemed so pleased with his
+new footwear that he just couldn’t help exhibiting them to me. “Look,”
+he said, waving his huge foot, shod with the trench shoes, about
+promiscuously, “look ad da shoos. I like t’ geev da Kais a keek in da
+face wid-a dose shoos. Bet he no smile some more dan.” Then he added, by
+way of showing his qualifications to muss up the Kaiser, “I belonga to
+ah wreckin’ crew sometimes when I don’t come down here.”
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+SWEAR; If you can’t think of anything else to say, but do it
+softly—very, very softly, so no one else but yourself will hear you.
+
+Thus reads the sign that hangs over the door of the Y. M. C. A. shack,
+at the end of our camp street. That’s what I call social work humanized.
+The Y. M. C. A. here is the most human institution in this big, rawly
+human community. It is the thing that puts the soul in soldier as one
+chap expresses it. And because it is that way, and because the men feel
+at home and have a real time, and can smoke and put their feet on the
+table, they think the red triangle is the best little symbol about the
+big camp. The “’Sociation” is making thousands of friends every day
+among these strapping big, two-fisted fellows who really never knew what
+the organization was. It’s bully. We all wander over there sometime
+during every evening, if it’s only to listen to a new record on the
+phonograph.
+
+[Illustration: Our $10,000 a year song writer]
+
+The shacks (I don’t know how many there are, but there must be at least
+a dozen of them) are the centres of amusement and entertainment for us
+all. And we have some corking concerts and other forms of entertainments
+there. I don’t think I’ll ever forget our $10,000 a year song writer as
+he appeared last night, for instance, standing on top of the piano, his
+hair all mussed up and his army shirt opened at the throat, singing a
+solo through a megaphone. And it was some solo! About fifteen hundred
+huskies in khaki stood around and listened to him and joined in on the
+choruses.
+
+Then they have lectures: “Ten Years as a Lumber Jack,” “Farthest North,”
+by a certain well-known explorer; “My First Year of the Big War,” and
+similar subjects appear on the bulletin boards every other night.
+Nothing of the Sunday School variety about that sort of thing.
+
+And our prize fights!
+
+I’m all excited yet over the one I saw to-night. It was a whale of a
+battle; I mean the last one was, there being several on the program. The
+fellows fight for passes to go home on Sunday and the decision is left
+up to the onlookers. And if we don’t make the scrappers work for those
+passes, then no “pugs” ever did work.
+
+Most of the boxers are former pugilists who have been gathered up in the
+draft net, and so long as they can get a chance to put on the gloves
+they are just as pleased to be here as anywhere else from all
+appearances. But sometimes the scrappers aren’t “pugs” at that; just
+plain citizens who possibly have been shadow boxing in the secrecy of
+their bedrooms for the past ten years and longing for courage enough to
+step into the ring with a real fighter and discover how good (or how
+bad) they are. They are getting the opportunity here all right, and some
+of them are uncovering a likely line of jabs and counters. One
+fair-haired youngster downed a mighty pugnacious-looking Italian a few
+nights ago.
+
+But to-night’s final was a winner. Three scraps had been pulled off with
+real enthusiasm and after the final round, there was a call for more
+material, but no one in the crowd came forward to put on the gloves.
+There were calls and jeers and all that sort of thing, then suddenly out
+from the crowd stepped a soggy-looking, little red-haired fellow.
+
+Yells of “Yah Redney!” “Hi Redney!” “Good boy Brick Top!”
+
+Redney blushed considerably and held up his hand for silence. And when
+he got it he explained.
+
+“I ain’t a-going to fight no one but our Mess Sergeant. That’s what I’m
+out here for, and I’ll stick here till he comes.”
+
+Calls for Mess Sergeant. He wasn’t present. A speeding messenger from
+Red’s company hurried out through the night to find him. Ten minutes
+later, said Sergeant, a soggy-looking chap himself, was brought in and
+amid yells from the crowd he stepped inside the ring. He looked once at
+Brick Top, then spat on his hands and said:
+
+“Where’s them gloves?”
+
+Gloves were produced and laced on, then without the preliminary
+handshake they squared off and went to it. And what a battle! They
+didn’t stop for rounds, or time out, or anything. They just ducked and
+punched and whaled away at each other until the blood began to spatter
+all over and still they kept at it. I don’t know what the
+misunderstanding between them was and didn’t find out, but they sure
+meant to settle the thing once and for all.
+
+And the spectators; they went wild.
+
+For ten minutes steadily the fighters milled and I never saw a better
+slugging match. The Sergeant had had more experience in boxing, that was
+certain, but what Red lacked in skill he made up for in hitting power.
+Every time his glove met the Sergeant’s face it smacked as loud as a
+hand clap.
+
+[Illustration: They didn’t stop for rounds, or time out, or anything.]
+
+Then just when it seemed as if they must be tired out, there was a
+sudden clash and a whirl of fists and Redney ducked away and started one
+from the floor. It was an uppercut and it found a clean hole between the
+Sergeant’s two arms, and met him flush on the point of the jaw. He
+staggered, tried to fall into a clinch, missed the elusive Redney and
+went down with a thump.
+
+“1-2-3-4-5-6-” counted the referee.
+
+The Sergeant rolled over and tried to get up. “Don’t hold me down; lemme
+at him,” he said huskily. But no one was holding him down. It was his
+refractory nerves. They wouldn’t obey his will power.
+
+“7-8-9-10,” tolled off the fateful numbers. Then what a yell went up for
+Redney, and Red, almost all in, himself, evidently had satisfied his
+grudge, for he went over and helped stand the groggy Sergeant on his
+feet.
+
+And all agreed it was some battle.
+
+But the Y.M. shacks aren’t dedicated to prize fights and swearing and
+concerts entirely. They are the nearest approach to home or club life
+that most of us come in contact with for weeks at a stretch. The big,
+open hearths with their crackling logs are mighty fine places to spend a
+pleasant hour or two. Then there are the writing tables, and the reading
+rooms with their books and magazines, and the phonographs.
+
+The other night I saw a great big fellow, with burly fists and a stubbly
+beard on his chin (it must have been the night before his bi-weekly
+shave, which is as often as most of us can find time—or the inclination
+to use a razor) snuggled up close to the phonograph and listening
+attentively to the “Swanee River,” which he was playing as softly as the
+instrument would permit, and now and then he would blow his nose in a
+big handkerchief and wipe suspicious signs of moisture from the corners
+of his eyes. He was having a regular sad drunk and enjoying every moment
+of it. I’ll bet he thought he was the most homesick mortal in camp.
+
+Then there are the telephone booths. Every night there is a line of at
+least fifty men waiting patiently for a chance in the booth. At a dollar
+a call they ring up the folks in the city and have five minutes’ chat
+with them, just by way of warding off an attack of homesickness. I’ve
+used the booth five dollars’ worth to date.
+
+These army breeches I’m wearing, I noticed to-night, are very
+comfortable. I like the deep, straight pockets in them. I think I’ll
+have my civilian suit made with those kind of pockets hereafter. But I
+haven’t gotten over the habit of pulling them up each time I sit down so
+that they won’t get baggy at the knees.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+Found my dog!
+
+I was over in another section of the cantonment this morning, for a few
+moments between drill and mess call, and there was “Local Board No. 163”
+as big as life, trotting along beside a chap I knew. It was Billy Allen.
+The dog recognized me and so did Billy and we stopped a while and
+compared notes.
+
+Billy had the worst hard luck story in respect to the Draft of any man I
+know. He’s an old National Guardsman, having enlisted soon after we left
+school together. Spent eight years in the infantry, and went to the
+Border. He left the service after he got back and a little later when a
+call came for men for the Officers’ Reserve Corps he applied and was
+accepted, for the second camp. Meanwhile he had registered as a man of
+draft age. Then came his call for Officers’ Training Camp, where he was
+making out famously; so well in fact that he was recommended for the
+aero-plane service.
+
+But the recommendation was as far as he got. The drawing had meanwhile
+been made in Washington, he was well up in the list and one fine day he
+received a notice to appear for examination. Of course he passed and was
+accepted. That yanked him out of the Officers’ Reserve and now he’s down
+here, a private in the “Suicide Club,” with Buck Winters, an old
+classmate of both of us, his commanding officer.
+
+I told him about “Local Board No. 163” whom he had dubbed “Mut” because
+he looked it. First we were going to match for the dog, but we decided,
+after a moment’s reflection, to let him choose his master. Billy said
+good-bye and walked one way and I walked the other and the dog, after a
+moment’s hesitation, went with Billy. And so I lost my dog a second
+time. I guess he didn’t like my cold water treatment for fleas.
+
+An interesting thing happened here to-day that just shows how vast this
+huge cantonment is. The cot next to Fat and two below me has been vacant
+ever since we have been here. To-night a chap came in from the barracks
+next door, bag and baggage, and took possession of it. Fat made his
+acquaintance right off, and the newcomer told him that he had been
+transferred to this company about the time we were—a week or so ago—and
+since no one told him where to go or where to bunk he went to the
+barracks next door and took a cot.
+
+But he really belonged in here and was a member of our squad, which for
+some mysterious reason had always remained a seven-man squad, with the
+eighth man assigned to it but never heard from. Every roll call he had
+been marked absent, and he had been put down as a deserter and an alarm
+sent out for him through the country. At the present moment the New York
+police are searching diligently for him.
+
+[Illustration: I guess he didn’t like my cold water treatment for fleas]
+
+And all the time he has been within a biscuit toss of his proper place.
+
+Over in the other company he was an outcast, and they didn’t know what
+to do with him. They were on the point of sending him back to the city
+as an interloper when somehow the mistake was discovered and he was
+summoned to report over here. The interesting part of it is, that he is
+an expert accountant, and his specialty is searching out mistakes that
+other people make in the way of misplaced figures and things.
+
+So far as the police were concerned, he said, he didn’t care much, for
+the last place they would ever look for him was down here. Speaking of
+deserters, I noticed three sets of finger-prints on our bulletin board
+which means that three men have taken French leave and they have prices
+on their heads, already.
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+This has been a moist and soggy day. I don’t know that I have ever seen
+so much rain before in one storm as I have to-day. Before daylight it
+began; a perfect downpour, so violent that for reveille we lined up in
+the mess hall. None of us ventured out to wash up, but those of us who
+missed a cold sprinkle the most had merely to poke our heads out of the
+windows for a moment and then reach for a towel. Some wetness.
+
+The camp is a veritable sea of mud, and those who go outdoors at all do
+so to the imminent peril of becoming mired and never returning. From the
+mess-hall windows at breakfast we could watch the big heavy motor truck
+of the transportation train, skidding and sloshing about in the road,
+down which flooded a perfect torrent of muddy rain water. Several of
+them became hopelessly stuck in the sticky mud, and their drivers
+abandoned them and raced for cover in the Y. M. C. A. shack. Officers
+and men everywhere have given up all idea of outdoor work and the camp
+streets look forlorn and deserted. They stretch away down the hill to
+fade into the misty blur of the rain itself, and on either hand stand
+the long, unpainted barracks buildings, with dripping eaves and rain
+blowing in sheets from their tinned and tar-papered roofs. Outside, it
+is a dismal, deserted-looking cantonment, with scarcely a sign of life,
+save now and then a venturesome canine mascot scuttling from one
+sheltered spot to another.
+
+Drilling, of course, is utterly impossible and the nearest approach we
+have had to anything resembling military training to-day is a lecture on
+sanitation in the mess hall by the First Lieutenant.
+
+But the rain has not dampened our desires for amusement and as a result
+the interior of the sleeping quarters presents, at the present time, a
+picture that only a Remington could do justice to. Atmosphere sticks out
+all over the place. Army overcoats, tunics, variegated comforters,
+blankets, mess kits, sweaters and flannel shirts are hanging from every
+peg, and men are sprawled on their cots, in various attitude, some
+trying hard to sleep, some writing, one man thoughtfully locating the
+notes of a new tune on a mouth organ, while another over in the
+corner—an Italian—is the centre of an enthusiastic group, while he plays
+doleful things on an old accordion he has smuggled into camp. The air is
+blue with tobacco smoke.
+
+A number of us are writing, including myself, but the chief centres of
+interest are the two big poker games and the big crap game down at the
+end of the room.
+
+They are all playing with that oppressive quietness that portends big
+stakes. I was startled a while ago upon walking over to the nearest
+group to discover eighty dollars, in ones, fives, and tens on the top of
+the army cot that served as a table in a single jack pot, and they were
+still betting. Our two Regular Army Sergeants are members of one group
+and Fat is sitting in at another. From the length of time he has stayed
+and the smile on his face, I can only guess that luck is with him for
+once.
+
+But it has failed a lot of others. Now and then a man leaves one game or
+the other, looking sort of hopeless. There is always some one to take
+his place, however.
+
+One of these fellows, gone broke, hit upon a happy idea which caused no
+end of interest for an hour or two this afternoon. After he had gone
+broke he left the game and sat thoughtfully on the edge of his cot for a
+while. Then he dug down into his duffel bag under his cot and brought
+forth a razor. Speedily he made up some raffle tickets on slips of note
+paper and presently, with the razor in one hand and his campaign hat in
+the other, he started through the room selling chances on the razor at a
+dime a chance. The raffle was held over in our corner, and one lucky
+chap got the razor, easily worth two fifty, for a single dime and the
+erstwhile owner, with five dollars worth of change in his pockets,
+returned to the game.
+
+That started the raffle bug, and presently a wrist watch was put up,
+then another razor of the safety variety, a fountain pen, an extra hand
+knitted sweater which some one had luckily acquired, several boxes of
+crackers which every one took a chance on at a cent a chance and a
+variety of other things. But the crackers were the most popular and that
+helped one ingenious and venturesome chap to evolve a money-making
+scheme.
+
+In the height of the rainstorm, he was seen to don his slicker, and
+hurry out into the storm. He splashed all the way over to the Post
+Exchange (about half a mile) to return a half-hour later with four pies
+for which he had paid forty cents each and three dozen boxes of crackers
+all in good condition. The crackers went for double their value and the
+pies he successfully split up into twelve fair-sized portions which sold
+for ten cents each. That trip in the rain netted him nearly seven
+dollars he told me, and that seven dollars later on, invested in the
+crap game, trebled itself; so, all things considered, he has had a more
+or less successful day.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+It is fast getting home to me now that in spite of the heterogeneous
+conglomeration, of races and creeds and languages, the National Army is
+going to be the real thing as a fighting force after all. Every one is
+keen for the thing now that the first violent attacks of homesickness
+have worn off and they are going at their work of becoming soldiers with
+a will, except, of course, for a few: the conscientious objectors; and
+their life is no merry one. They are mighty unpopular, as numerous black
+eyes attest. Every one takes the slightest opportunity to emphasize
+their displeasure at the stand these men have taken. And some of them
+are going around here under a cloud. For instance, the one in the
+Machine Gun outfit who drills in pumps and summer suit but who has the
+pleasure of knowing that after his soldiering is all over with, he has
+three years to spend in Atlanta or some other Federal jail for little
+things he has done and views he has expressed.
+
+We have one of the breed in our company, a Jew; and he’s the most
+unpopular man in the outfit, even among those of his own race. All of
+this variety, (the “objectors” I mean), who have come to my notice, are
+sorry specimens of manhood for the most part and I can’t blame an
+able-bodied chap for despising them.
+
+The foreign element is taking hold like real Americans. It is
+interesting to get their slant on the whole affair. Many of them didn’t
+want to come. They had their own ideas of army life, suggested,
+doubtless, by tales they have heard of service in the European armies of
+former days. But when they were called they came; and behold, when they
+arrived and lived through the first days, they were surprised to find
+that they still were treated like human beings, had certain indisputable
+rights, were fed well and cared for properly and worked under officers
+who took a genuine interest in their welfare. This was something most
+unexpected. Right off they decided that they were going to get all they
+could out of this new life and give in return faithful and honest
+service.
+
+[Illustration: “Make-a me strong, make-a me beeg, an’ best-a make-a me
+good American”]
+
+“It’s fine, I like it,” assured a little Italian friend of mine in the
+infantry. “I like it because it help make me spick good English, make-a
+me strong, make-a me beeg an’ best-a what is, make-a me good American,
+jus like-a de boss Lieuten’.”
+
+And in that last sentence, I believe, lies the charm of it all to most
+of the foreigners. They have learned that America and things American
+are fine and clean and good and their ambition now is to become a real
+American “jus like-a de boss Lieuten’.” And when they get to be real
+Americans, they are going to be proud of the fact and they are going to
+fight to prove it; that’s certain.
+
+The camp is still soggy to-day and we have drilled ankle deep in mud. My
+feet have been wet from the time I stepped out of the barracks until an
+hour ago, when I changed my socks and put on my dress shoes. But shucks,
+what appetites we brought back with us from the parade grounds. I never
+did care for fish, but I’ll be hanged if I didn’t eat three helpings of
+the creamed salmon and spaghetti to-night.
+
+A new wrinkle has developed here. We find out what the fellows are going
+to have for supper in nearby barracks and if the feed promises to be
+better than what we are to have several of us take our mess tins and go
+over and stand in line there. The Mess Sergeant never knows the
+difference.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+Sad news this evening. Only twenty-five per cent. of each company is to
+be allowed to go home to-morrow, because of the disorder and general
+trouble at the railroad terminal last Sunday. And the twenty-five per
+cent. is to be drawn out of a hat. No chance for Fat or me, that’s
+certain. We’re mighty unlucky when it comes to passes and we are laying
+odds now that neither of us will get permission to go to the city.
+Anyhow, Fat is still in the same predicament. If he does get a pass he
+won’t be able to leave the camp.
+
+At the present writing we are all waiting for the mess call. And
+immediately after mess the Sergeant will do the drawing of the names for
+the passes. If I am not among the lucky ones I’m going to try and—there
+goes the mess call!
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+I am ready to die with a smile on my lips and a great happiness in my
+heart, for I’ve spent one night between clean sheets, on a really soft
+bed. I’ve eaten with a silver knife and fork from real dishes
+and—whispered softly—in the privacy of my own home I had a glass of
+beer!
+
+No, I wasn’t lucky (neither was Fat) but I think I put something over on
+Uncle Sam.
+
+The passes for the city were drawn for as per schedule and since I was
+down at the bottom of the list I was not included in the first
+twenty-five per cent. The passes issued read for New York City, and the
+men holding them were privileged to leave by certain trains, being
+marched down to the station under the watchful eye of the Second
+Lieutenant.
+
+Then, after these men were all away, came the opportunity for the men
+who lived near the camp and the men who wanted to visit nearby towns to
+apply for leave. This was my opportunity. I applied for thirty-six
+hours’ leave to visit the town of R——, twenty miles distant, and secured
+it.
+
+Back in the barracks an interesting scene was taking place, scores of
+tickets of leave had been handed out to the men, to take the night and
+following day off, but to get out of camp they must be able to pass
+inspection with perfect and well-fitting equipment, and since all of us
+had not our full outfit, we had to hustle around and borrow articles of
+clothing that would fit and look satisfactory. I, for instance, have a
+full winter uniform except for overcoat (which I have not received) and
+tunic, the one I am wearing being a summer coat of cotton and hardly
+matching the wool trousers I possess. So I had to join the crowd who
+were bartering, exchanging and renting uniforms. And since the first men
+to leave had done the same thing to a certain extent, there was not much
+desirable clothing left in the barracks. Overcoats were going at a
+dollar a day and breeches and jackets for fifty cents each. After a
+diligent search I did find a chap who had a winter tunic and summer
+trousers and, wonder of wonders, his jacket fit me perfectly. We made an
+exchange and I borrowed an overcoat at one dollar for the day, from a
+chap who was not leaving camp, and sallied forth.
+
+Tramping down Twenty-third Avenue (the streets are all named here and
+our barracks is on Fourteenth Street and Third Avenue), whom should I
+behold but friend Billy, bound in the same direction. He had had the
+same inspiration as I and he, too, had a pass for R——. We wandered on
+together, but upon reaching the railroad station, our hopes of getting
+to our destination were dashed. There were no more trains for R—— until
+the morning!
+
+We wept. But our tears didn’t blind us to the fact that there were
+occasional machines passing along the highway. So we walked out and
+stood there in the moonlight and looked as lonesome and forlorn as
+possible.
+
+And the first machine to come along was a beautiful big Pierce Arrow
+limousine, with an old dowager, a pleasant and generous old soul, its
+single occupant, save of course the chauffeur. We went to R—— in style;
+and, moreover, we went there in a hurry, for with khaki in the machine
+the chauffeur assumed that he had the right of way and full permission
+to wreck the speed laws.
+
+At R—— we looked up time tables and discovered that we could get a train
+into the city at ten-thirty, which was not so bad. Then, because our
+passes really limited us to R——, we concluded that it was only fair to
+the Government to at least eat a meal in that town and since we were
+both hungry in spite of our recent mess, we searched for a restaurant.
+
+We found one; a French restaurant, which looked peculiarly deserted. The
+door was locked, for some strange reason, yet there were several men in
+aprons inside apparently hard at work. We rattled on the door and in a
+moment the frowning proprietor came forward. But the frown changed to a
+smile when he saw us. It was the khaki. He unbolted the door and, with a
+ceremonious bow, welcomed us in, then closed the door and bolted it.
+
+And then he explained that this was a new restaurant not yet opened for
+patronage. He expected to open up in a day or maybe two. But, of course,
+he could not turn away two hungry soldiers, never. _Merci non!_ He had
+nothing to serve us with, but what were our desires? Express them and he
+would send out for the provisions, cook them and serve them. Steak!
+Indeed, yes. In twenty minutes we would have a wonderful steak, French
+fried potatoes, salad, coffee and ice cream. Jean would attend to it.
+
+And Jean did. He rustled up the steak and the rest and we alone occupied
+the restaurant, and soon were eating the most delicious piece of beef we
+believed we had ever put our teeth through. The bill! Nothing; nothing
+at all—what?—well if we insist, one dollar each. Thank you! And now here
+is a pen and some ink. You will please autograph each bill and behold,
+when you return from glorious France, covered with glorious glory, you
+should come in and see these two bills—the first money taken in at the
+restaurant—framed and hanging there over the desk. And so, I suppose,
+the future generation of visitors to R—— will be able to view these
+immortal monuments to our—I don’t know what, unless it be our khaki
+uniforms—hanging there in the French restaurant possibly surrounded by
+wreaths as each anniversary of day before yesterday rolls ’round.
+
+We got the ten-thirty train for the city, and we almost got into trouble
+too; or at least I did, for as we hurried into the smoker whom should I
+see sitting buried in a magazine but the First Lieutenant of our
+Company. Had he made the trip the same way we did? I don’t know and, of
+course, I didn’t ask. We just walked through the car very swiftly and he
+never looked up.
+
+It was fifteen minutes of midnight when I arrived home, let myself in
+with my latch key which I have been carrying as a silent reminder of my
+former terrifically wild (?) career; routed out the folks, and sat
+swathed in bath-robe and dressing-gown until 3 o’clock, just talking. It
+was bully. And then I tumbled into my own bed and slept and slept and
+slept. I woke up at reveille all right—(it was just daylight)—grinned,
+rolled over and slept and slept and slept some more.
+
+Then I had a real bath in a real tub with real hot water, and a lot of
+real things to eat and real cigars to smoke and real friends to talk
+with until five o’clock in the afternoon, when I crawled into my
+regimentals once more, and went out to meet Billy by appointment.
+
+Going back via R—— route (which was necessary) curtailed our leave which
+really continues until to-morrow morning at reveille, but then we were
+very happy; so happy that when we arrived in R—— we chartered a taxi-cab
+for the twenty mile drive out here and now I’m nearly frozen through
+from the cold wind that blew in at us. And I’m tired, too, but I’m happy
+and ready to turn in ten minutes before taps.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+I’ll need no “Melody in Snore Minor” to lull me to sleep to-night, for I
+am thoroughly weary. It was intimated a day or so ago that our training
+would be hurried a little so that we would be ready for a quick shift at
+any time. But hurried doesn’t exactly describe it. It looks like an
+early fall drive to me.
+
+We began at the beginning, this morning, and had our squad drills all
+over again, and somehow in the juggling about of men to make up our
+company formation I managed to get last place in line, and pivot man in
+the front rank of the last squad.
+
+Before to-day I’ve been in the rear rank and had a screen of front-rank
+men to cover up any blunders I might make, but being in the first file
+gave me stage fright. And, of course, with the stage fright I
+bungled;—forgot which was left and which was right. We began by facing,
+and first chance I managed to turn left when the command was right. That
+blunder made me more self-conscious. If I had had to talk I’m sure I
+would have stuttered. As it was I stammered with my feet.
+
+Then “About Face.”
+
+I faced about all right, only I pivoted on a stump root that some stupid
+had forgotten to dig out. The result was I lost my balance, and made
+several movements instead of one before I came to position.
+
+At drills the Sergeants, who do most of the drilling, are equipped with
+sticks about a yard long so that they can poke a rear-rank man in the
+back without disturbing the front-rank men, and thus call attention to
+blunders. Being a rear-rank man on the about face, I presently felt the
+stick poking into my ribs and the command:
+
+“You step out here.”
+
+I stepped out, and was requested, along with much language, to go up in
+front of the company and give a demonstration in the proper method of
+“about facing.”
+
+[Illustration: A demonstration in the proper method of “about facing”]
+
+My self-consciousness fled immediately. I was mad. I wanted to talk
+back, and make a few remarks about the Sergeant and the stump and
+things. But I suddenly thought of a tour of kitchen police and
+restrained myself. Instead I about faced with such energy that the
+Sergeant knew I was boiling inside, and being a decent sort of a chap,
+he sent me back to the ranks after a couple of demonstrations, instead
+of keeping me out there for fifteen minutes as I have seen them do to
+some fellows.
+
+After that I felt more at ease in the front rank. All morning long we
+ambled across the landscape, doing squad and company movements. It was
+just drill, drill, drill, for fifty out of every sixty minutes, the ten
+minutes being allowed as rest periods. We reviewed all our previous
+instructions and worked up to the point of forming company fronts, with
+the movements of right and left front into line and on right into line,
+and as pivot man, I think I did mighty well. Our squad never stepped off
+a pace ahead of time on any of the formations. And when we were marching
+back to the barracks at mess time, the Sergeant came up beside me, and
+remarked, by way of apology for hauling me out of the ranks earlier in
+the morning, that I was doing good pivot work.
+
+Perhaps we didn’t enjoy mess! Three helpings of navy beans for me with
+pineapple marmalade, and a piece of salt pork on the side, not to
+mention three cups of coffee and three slices of bread. I sure had luck
+on the mess line to-day.
+
+This afternoon the First Lieutenant took charge of the company, and he
+had us traipsing all over the landscape again, doing the same sort of
+close order manœuvres, and when we lined up just before retreat he
+announced that we would have rifles to-morrow morning.
+
+It is interesting to see how rumours travel and gather force in the
+barracks. Some one, somehow, heard that an artist and a stenographer
+from our company are to sail for France in a day or two. Of course, all
+my friends have come to the conclusion that I am the artist. A chap told
+me about it at mess this evening, and since then several dozen have
+looked me up to shake hands with me and tell me good-bye, with such
+remarks as: “Hear you have orders to sail for France to-morrow; great.”
+“They tell me you got a commission from Washington and that you are
+going across in a day or two,” or, “Say, you’re a lucky chap; where’d
+you get the drag down in Washington?”
+
+But these queries fail absolutely to thrill me. I am quite calm and
+undisturbed. I deny any “drag” whatever, and I know that I am not the
+artist mentioned in the order for transfer, if there is any such order,
+which I doubt. This is only about the _n_th time that same rumour has
+been afloat as a result of which I have bade good-bye to my friends
+about every other day only to discover myself still with them a week
+later with the same old rumour bobbing up again.
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+I’m really a soldier. I know the manual of arms.
+
+This morning, true to the First Lieutenant’s prediction, we drilled with
+rifles and now I am quite convinced of the truth of the old saying that
+a gun is dangerous without lock, stock, or barrel. Fat turned around
+suddenly when he had his rifle over his shoulder and poked the muzzle of
+it into my mouth; a regular Happy Hooligan performance, and now I have a
+split (and considerably puffed) lip and a loose tooth to my credit in
+this horrible war.
+
+We were marched over to one of the infantry barracks on the edge of the
+big parade grounds and there we found our rifles; I mean ours for the
+day only, because there are hardly enough in camp to equip us all yet
+and we have to take turns using them. In the same way there is only one
+field piece to each artillery company, but that doesn’t seem to worry
+the artillery men much.
+
+They are doing some real drilling over on the other side of the camp. I
+was surprised to discover a company at work digging trenches, another
+company practising throwing hand grenades, with stones representing the
+deadly Mill’s bombs, still another group constructing parapets of sand
+bags, and working out machine gun emplacements, and in the distance
+artillery companies hovering about a sleek looking gun, learning the
+complicated parts and where and how the animals are served.
+
+Krags, instead of Springfields, are the rifles available for drilling
+purposes here, and for the first hour this morning we devoted our time
+to learning the floor plan of the thing. I was getting along famously
+until Fat interrupted my investigations with the muzzle of his weapon.
+
+Soon after that we started drilling. And I think it is to our credit
+that before noon we had mastered all the movements and that our pieces
+snapped up to position with real vigour.
+
+“Let me hear them hands slap them pieces,” said the Sergeant; then
+“Ri—sholler—harms! One-two-three-four! Pep, that’s it, pep an’ snap.
+Slap ’em hard. Ordah—harms! One-two-three! _Done_ drop ’em—_done_ slam
+’em down. Nex’ man slams ’em gits kitchen p’lice.”
+
+So we drilled until our arms ached, and rifles that weighed about eight
+pounds at the beginning of the drill seemed to have increased to fifty
+pounds, and felt as long as telephone poles. Perhaps we weren’t glad
+when our First Lieutenant put a stop to the punishment and started us in
+the general direction of the mess hall.
+
+And we had beef stew for dinner; beef stew with rich brown gravy, such
+as our old biscuit shooter alone can make.
+
+But after mess we were back at it again. Only this time it was bayonet
+practice, but not of the variety pictured in most magazines. We haven’t
+reached the stage of charging trenches and swinging bundles of sticks.
+Such advanced work comes later.
+
+Bayonets are awkward, ugly things, and I could not help being grateful
+that Fat took it into his head to poke me in the mouth with his rifle
+this morning instead of this afternoon. If he had waited until after
+mess he wouldn’t have split my lip; he would have cut my head off. When
+I saw him with bayonet fixed I gave him a wide radius of action. Indeed
+I avoided him as if he were a plague.
+
+In open, or extended, order we lined up on the parade grounds in front
+of one of these movable elevated platforms. Our Second Lieutenant
+mounted this, and with a bayonetted rifle in hand went through the
+various lunges, thrusts and parries of the bayonet manual, meanwhile
+giving us a lecture, to the effect that no matter what the War
+Department intended to do with us, a knowledge of bayonet fighting would
+be essential. He assured us that the logical weapon for an American
+soldier was the rifle. One of our birthrights is markmanship and another
+is bayonet fighting. He briefly cantered over a century and a half of
+history of the Republic and pointed out how we had won fame and honour
+with bullet and bayonet, and he wound up by telling us that every
+American soldier should prepare himself so that he would be as dangerous
+to fool with as a stick of dynamite. Picture good-natured Fat
+impersonating a stick of dynamite.
+
+Then we went at it. We lunged and thrust and parried until perspiration
+began to stand out on our foreheads. From the corner of my eye I had a
+vision of Fat trying to disguise himself as a high explosive. Every time
+he lunged, he would scowl viciously and emit a loud grunt. I discovered
+a few moments ago, however, that it was a case of over-eating at mess
+time that caused him to grunt and frown every time he tried to move very
+fast; not a desire to look ferocious, although I guess it passed for
+that in the eyes of the instructor.
+
+And now I’m told we are to get this sort of training daily for a long
+period; close order formation in the morning, with rifle and bayonet
+drill in the afternoon and later on we will do skirmish work, trench
+work and open order work with rifles. Some of the infantry companies are
+already doing that. I was treated to the spectacle of two companies
+scurrying across the upper end of the parade grounds like so many
+rabbits. Now and then they would fling themselves down on their stomachs
+and begin snapping away merrily with empty rifles at an imaginary enemy.
+
+We are a tired-looking company to-night. Already half the cots are
+filled with men, some of them snoring lustily and it is only a quarter
+to ten.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+There are a lot of things calculated to stir a chap’s sentimental streak
+about this camp, particularly the nights; moonlight nights like to-night
+for instance. Every hard outline of the huge place is softened under the
+blue-black mantle of night, and the disagreeable things are lost in the
+heavy shadows and the moonlight floods the open places, and glistens on
+the rows upon rows of tin roofs and tall, gaunt-looking tin
+smoke-stacks. Watch-fires (a sanitary precaution) blaze in their deep
+holes in the rear of each barracks building, and the lonesome
+fire-guard, bundled in his overcoat and with rifle over his shoulder,
+stands silhouetted against the night sky beside each flaring pit.
+
+Out on the main streets of the camp are thousands of fellows in khaki,
+walking aimlessly up and down, while in the by-streets between the
+barracks buildings one sees shadowy figures and glowing cigarette ends
+moving about in the darkness. Through the tiny panes of each barracks
+window, partly obscured by overcoats and sweaters which dangle from pegs
+inside, filters a warm yellow light, and as one moves down the row, one
+hears from one building the music of an accordion and the rhythmic
+shuffle of feet which tells of a “stag” dance being held in the mess
+hall; while from another comes the soft plunk-plunking of a banjo and
+the occasional drone of a mouth organ that seeks after harmony, but only
+succeeds with an effort.
+
+Off to the right toward the parade grounds some fellows are singing and
+their songs sound mighty good in the moonlight. And from far beyond
+where the thick pine woods stand out black against the sky comes faintly
+the hooting of a distant owl.
+
+On the main streets that skirt the outer edge of the cantonment on three
+sides, the arc lights glisten, like rows of far off diamonds against the
+velvet of a jewel box, and here and there, where two twinkle, like
+low-hung stars, stand out the Y.M. shacks where the men are gathering
+for an evening’s recreation.
+
+It is wonderful to wander out such nights as these. Bundled in a sweater
+to keep out the chill of evening, and with only my pipe for company, I
+often go tramping off through the by-streets of the camp. The smoke of
+the hundreds of watch-fires is wafted to me on every breeze and in wood
+smoke there is a charm; the charm of camping out. Never in my life will
+I smell the smoke of burning pine wood, but that these nights will come
+trooping through my memory, and I’m certain that I will be homesick then
+and want to come back and live them all over again.
+
+And the things I often see:—the fire-guard for instance, who alone out
+there behind the barracks was trying hard to read a letter by the light
+of his flickering watch-fire. Was it a letter he had just received and
+could not wait to open, or was it a letter that he had read many, many
+times before and was rereading once again? Then the lonesome dog who sat
+out in the company street and stared up solemnly at the moon, like a
+lone wolf on the prairie. What instincts were being waked within him by
+the moonlight? And the silhouette through the window of the chap sitting
+on his cot patiently plying needle and thread and the two fellows who
+leaned against the jacketed field piece in front of an artillery
+barracks and talked in whispers, while through the opened door of the
+buildings on either hand came the noise of a rousing good time within.
+
+Then the tramp up Tower Hill, where the headquarters building with its
+darkened windows like sightless eyes stands out from the sparse remains
+of the pine woods, flecked here and there with patches of moonlight.
+
+Far off across the great camp, and across the tops of the pines one can
+dimly see from the top of the hill the ocean with the moonlight flashing
+on its surface, and occasionally comes a breath of chilled salt air that
+stirs a longing, vague and fleeting, as the ocean has always stirred a
+longing in the soul of the adventurer. From here one can look down upon
+the great camp. Thousands and thousands of roofs stand out in the
+moonlight, and the watch-fires twinkle in orderly rows up and down each
+camp street. Far off to the left are the big machine shops and forges of
+the construction company, the forge fires glowing red against the night,
+while faintly comes the far-off ring of anvils. Those forge fires, like
+the bakery fires, never die.
+
+To the eastward is the railroad terminal with its panting engines and
+its medley of noises, while nearer at hand but in the same direction is
+the transport headquarters with its ceaselessly moving caravan of
+rumbling, grumbling army trucks. All combines to make a picture that
+holds one spell-bound.
+
+The days here are pleasant indeed, but the nights are almost
+intoxicating. They cast a spell upon me and leave a memory that can
+never fade.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+This place looks like a growing mining town somewhere out West, but for
+real atmosphere, the civilian camp, outside the reservation, has the
+cantonment looking really civilized. I went out there this evening after
+mess; for I heard that there was a cigar store included in the outfit,
+and the impression I got was a lasting one. Everything of the frontier
+was there save the saloons and the gambling halls. Shacks, tents (rows
+upon rows of them), lean-tos and all forms of domiciles. And the men who
+walked the streets were of every variety, including real lumber jabs in
+mackinaws and spiked boots, who had come down to cut away the timber;
+Italians, Poles, Swedes, Slavs and what not, and a real cowgirl, in
+short skirts and high leather boots, with a silk handkerchief scarf,
+sombrero and a big thirty-eight strapped to her hip. She, I learned,
+runs a motor bus between the civilian camp and the nearest towns.
+
+Cook fires twinkled outside of the tents, lights showed through the
+canvas walls reflecting the huge, grotesque, shadowy figures of the
+occupants. From one emanated the strains of an accordion and from
+another the babble of voices that suggested a quarrel over a card game.
+
+I found the cigar store. I found other stores, too, just shacks thrown
+together, but carrying a stock of everything in the line of wearing
+apparel and eatables. One displayed the sign of “Jack’s Unsurpassable
+Lunch,” another “The Elite,” and another “The Emporium.” There were
+hundreds of squalid booth-like structures besides, where a host of
+curious things were for sale to the hordes of big-fisted, deep-chested
+men who were brought there to build the cantonment. But they tell me
+that the civilian camp is fast breaking up now, for the cantonment is
+almost completed. The remount stables for the artillery, the
+refrigerating plant and the huge bakery are all that remain to be built
+and the labourers are leaving in big groups.
+
+The temporary bakery (I passed it to-night on my way back to camp) is
+represented by a double line of tents, before each of which is a big
+field baking oven, its coal fire glowing from lower doors like huge, red
+eyes and its gaunt smoke-stack reaching upward to terminate in a cloud
+of black smoke which ascends higher and higher in long, graceful spirals
+until it is lost in the darkness of the night.
+
+Before these ovens work the bakers, in khaki, of course, but each
+swathed in a flowing white apron. With sleeves rolled up and shirts
+opened at the throat, they wield their long bakers’ paddles, and as they
+pass to and fro in the dull red firelight, they look elfish and
+grotesque; exactly like a lot of gnome bakers off in the “nowheres”
+baking bread for some ferocious ogre who bids them work incessantly.
+
+And these loaves they bake are indeed loaves for ogres; huge affairs two
+feet long and as big ’round their rich brown girth as pumpkins. In
+“sheets” of a dozen each they are brought from the fire and placed
+steaming hot on a nearby table where an expert breaks them apart and
+tests the tenderness of their fibre and searches for signs of
+doughiness. These bakers are all of the Regular Army now, but not long
+since czars of dingy cellar bakeries located anywhere from Boston to San
+Francisco. But the ogre has called them together and here like gnomes
+they work, eight hours each in three shifts and the oven fires are kept
+burning always.
+
+Still we drill, drill, drill. This morning was spent in manœuvring and
+tramping over the wet and soggy countryside in company formation, and
+this afternoon, by way of variety, we were given a few hours fatigue
+duty in the line of uprooting more stumps and gnarled tentacles, that
+seem to have rooted themselves in China. But our hands are hard and
+leathery now and our muscles no longer creak and pain under the stress.
+I’ve added four pounds to my former weight and I have never felt more
+fit in my life.
+
+[Illustration: They seemed to have rooted themselves in China]
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+The cost of high living here is enormous. The stoop-shouldered,
+shrewd-eyed, flinty-hearted Yankee clerks behind the broad counters of
+the “Post Exchange” disdain anything less than a quarter. Dimes and
+nickels are chicken-feed, and pennies—impossible. If a chap buys one
+apple at five cents or one pear or one banana (always green and a long
+way from being ripe) he has to hide himself in the crowd to escape the
+baleful eye of these grasping sharks. Five cent crackers sell two boxes
+for a quarter, penny candies are five cents each, cigars and cigarettes
+are considerably above normal in price and considerably below in
+quality, and ice cream sells for ten cents a gram.
+
+But none of us has grown up. We are all like big boys and we spend with
+no thought of to-morrow. Mess over, we all hie out to the two main roads
+that lead to the “Post Exchange,” jingling coins in our trouser pockets.
+The “Exchange” itself is a long, low unpainted building like all other
+buildings here with tiny back country windows, half-obscured by garments
+hanging within which leave only a few dirty squares for the dull yellow
+light to show through.
+
+The doors are broad and through them streams a never ending line of
+troopers, some coming, some going. Inside, the place resembles nothing
+more than a huge up-country general store with shelves upon shelves
+stacked high with cracker boxes, shoe boxes, hardware and goodness only
+knows what not, while from the rafters hang heavy coats, sweaters,
+lanterns, huge stalks of green bananas, hams, bacon, boots and a lot of
+useless things that only gullible soldiers who feel a yearning to spend
+their money really purchase. But this spending of money somehow seems to
+bring us closer to civilization for the moment and we join the churning
+mass of men within, whose hobnailed shoes produce a great pounding and
+scraping sound and whose voices are raised in a constant babble of
+conversation which only the sharp ting, ting of the cash register bells
+can punctuate.
+
+We mill around with the crowd, and soon are pushed against a counter.
+Something attracts our eye. We feel a desire to possess it. We buy it,
+and start milling about the room again until presently we are near the
+door. Then we step out into the night again and join one of the groups
+of loiterers or sit about on boxes and piles of lumber, where we devour
+our purchase, if it happens to be in the line of crackers (which is
+usually the case), or admire it, if it happens to be a pocket flash
+lamp, a fountain pen or something else that we really never have had any
+use for.
+
+The small-town idea prevails even in the city of thirty thousand
+lonesome men. The “Post Exchange” and the “Post Office” are the two
+centres of interest. First we wander to one, and then we wander to the
+other, then with time on our hands we join the stream of men going up
+one side of the road “just walkin’” and when we reach the point where
+most of the crowd turns back, we turn back, too, and continue our
+“walkin’,” with no particular place to go, until the streets begin to
+get deserted and it is time for the town to close up. Then we disappear,
+too, and for an hour occupy ourselves in the barracks until taps are
+sounded and lights are out, when we go to bed; the place I’m headed for
+now, so soon as I put the top on my fountain pen.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+[Illustration: Sick Call]
+
+That’s the call that brings out all the shirkers. They line up in the
+morning and present all sorts of ailments from sore throat to heart
+disease.
+
+The line is especially long on mornings when they know we are in for two
+hours of “settin’-ups” or when some especially hard detail such as camp
+orderly or kitchen police has been handed out. A day in the hospital
+will relieve one of all these duties. This morning I was on the long
+line. But I hasten to explain that _I_ was sick (that’s what they all
+say, of course,) with chills and a scrapy feeling in my throat; and
+since we are forbidden to take any medicine of our own, I shame-facedly
+line up with the rest of them. There were about twenty all told and the
+doctor made short work of us.
+
+“What’s the matter with you?” very cross.
+
+“I-I-I-here—it hurts,” said one, pointing to his back and looking quite
+scared. The M. D. poked his finger into the spot designated.
+
+“Man you’re not sick,” said the doctor in a very startling manner,
+“you’re almost dead, only you won’t lie down. You’ve dislocated a couple
+of vertibraes, ruptured a half-dozen ligaments and like as not you have
+a chronic case of pneumonia. The only thing that I can recommend for you
+is two hours of strenuous exercise. You may pull through and you may
+not.” Then, with a malicious grin, he turned to the next man and the
+first invalid shuffled off, mumbling something about horse doctors
+without any horse sense.
+
+Two out of twenty of us got by. The rest went to work. I was one of the
+two. I had a slight temperature and an inflamed throat. Nothing serious,
+but report to the hospital. I did. And the best thing about the hospital
+was the fact that there were two sheets on the bed and I had an
+abbreviated flannel nightshirt to sleep in. Three big pills, the size of
+bullets and just as deadly, and then I turned in, went to sleep and
+slept right through mess time.
+
+Four o’clock I was feeling very much better and ravenously hungry and at
+five o’clock I was discharged as cured. I don’t know what I was cured
+of, but I’m feeling much spryer just now after three helpings of beef
+stew and apple marmalade and I’m ready to turn in and sleep some more.
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+If there is one thing that I want to remember more than anything else
+about this Conscript Camp it is the spectacle I witnessed and took part
+in this evening.
+
+Fancy if you can Tower Hill with its big headquarters building snuggled
+in among the scattered and gaunt pines, the tall, ungainly water-tank
+propped up on all too spindly-looking stilts. On top of this a single
+figure thrown in bold relief by the golden yellow light of a big
+watch-fire, beating time with his baton, and below him, clothing the
+slopes of the hill five thousand men, his chorus, thundering forth
+across the starlit night “Columbia the Gem of the Ocean.” That chorus
+was wonderful; that crowd was wonderful; everything about it was
+wonderful.
+
+We were all singing; thousands of fellows in khaki, some snuggled in
+their big army overcoats, some puffed out like pouter pigeons with the
+sweaters they had piled on under their tunics against the cold chill of
+night. Intermingled were the lumber jacks and labourers from the
+civilian camp, most of them in gay mackinaws and caps; with now and then
+an officer immaculately clad in clean cut uniform, or a Y. M. C. A. man
+in grey-green suit with red circle and triangle gleaming in the
+firelight. And how well they could sing; I have never heard a more
+stirring chorus and as we raised our voices loud and clear shivery
+thrills raced up and down our spines, and we were stirred to the highest
+pitch of patriotic fervor. Indeed, there were some among us who could
+find no better way of expressing the emotion that swelled within save by
+tears. They cried. I was one of them.
+
+“America” and “Dixie” and “Maryland” followed and every one produced its
+own thrill and its own heartache. Never was there anything more
+stirring, Never was there anything finer. We sang till our voices were
+husky and the great chorus surged loud and clear across the night, until
+it must have echoed against the crags of the Rhine and caused the Hun to
+shudder.
+
+Then the breaking up of the big meeting, when groups detached themselves
+and wandered out of the fitful flicker of the dying firelight into the
+misty blue blackness of the night, still singing. Out through the
+streets of the camp we tramped, stepping to the cadence of our own
+songs. We were all happy, very, very happy and draft or no draft, down
+in our hearts we all knew that we were in the very place we were meant
+to be, and we were doing the very things that we should do, and that
+when the time came we would do other and greater things with as much
+eagerness and enthusiasm as we had sung up there on Tower Hill to-night.
+
+The whole camp was singing even after the concert, but the character of
+the songs changed. “Over There” swelled forth everywhere and “The
+Yankees Are Coming” was chanted in every street. Out toward our own
+barracks our little group swung, passing the railroad siding where,
+partly shrouded in the canvas jackets, new artillery pieces were waiting
+to be moved in the morning. A cheer for these and a cheer for everything
+and anything that suggested patriotism, and on we tramped, brimming over
+with enthusiasm.
+
+And now I’m back to the barracks again, but the mysteries of the night
+and the spell of the whole wonderful occasion is still over me and I
+know I shall lie awake a long, long time and think and dream of all that
+waits for me in the not very distant future. And the promises I made
+myself up there on Tower Hill will all be fulfilled, that’s certain.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+Momentous news. We of the headquarters company, or rather eighty-seven
+of us, start Monday on the first leg of that longed-for journey to
+France. We go to a Southern training camp where new units are being
+formed into which each of us will fit. And along with this news came the
+announcement that none of us will be given a pass to go home for a last
+good-bye. This has stirred the men more than the news of the transfer
+South. Several impromptu indignation meetings were held this morning and
+this afternoon, just after mess, a real demonstration took place in the
+mess hall and most of the eighty-seven of us were loud in our assertions
+that we would go home anyway, even though we were arrested for desertion
+afterward.
+
+This little incident served to impress upon me more than anything else
+the freedom that is accorded the men of this new American Army, for
+behold, before the meeting broke up a Lieutenant came in and addressed
+us on the penalties for desertion, the difficulty of dealing with
+headstrong soldiers and similar subjects, and then when we all felt and
+looked like slackers he announced that although orders had gone forth
+that no passes were to be granted, our commanding officer, knowing our
+feeling in the matter, was at that time trying very hard to arrange to
+secure permission for the men to go home over Saturday night and Sunday.
+As I left the mess hall I wondered vaguely how such a mass meeting would
+have been treated in the German Army, for instance, and I thanked my
+lucky stars that I was an American.
+
+But there are a thousand and one things remaining to be accomplished
+to-day. I have been hurrying from one place to another since reveille
+and now at taps all that I should do is not done yet. But to-morrow is
+another day.
+
+First of all we were rushed off to receive our third and fourth
+inoculations together. Then came the announcement that we would be
+relieved of all our winter clothing and given a complete summer outfit
+instead, for it appears there is no need for woollens in this Southland
+camp to which we are going.
+
+And between times, there were a score of personal things I wanted to do,
+not the least of which was to join the line of waiting men before the
+telephone booths in the Y. M. C. A. shacks to tell them at home the news
+of our going. In all this, poor Fat seems to be sadly left out, for he
+is not among the fellows who are to leave. He stands helplessly by and
+watches the hurry and bustle going on about him, and sometimes I think
+there is a sad, wistful sort of a look in his big, good-natured face,
+for I know he doesn’t like the idea of staying here when the snow begins
+to fall and winds whistle disconsolately around the corners of the
+barracks building. I am glad that _I_ will not have to spend the winter
+here and I’m sorry, too, that Fat is not to be with me.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+[Illustration: A soldier-boy in his native haunts]
+
+To-day, for the first time since I have been here, I had visitors. Those
+at home, eager to get a glimpse of their soldier-boy in his native
+haunts, came down to see things as they are. I’m quite certain that the
+general arrangement of the barracks, with its cluttered appearance
+suggested by many pairs of shoes standing around and many hats and coats
+and old sweaters hanging about, did not accord with mother’s ideas of
+good housekeeping. And she assured me that many of the old rose, pink
+and baby blue comforters would not have suffered from a washing, all of
+which I had never noticed before, until she drew my attention to it. She
+intimated, too, that my dish towel and my hand towel would never testify
+as to my respectable up-bringing, and she felt that I should make a
+practice of taking off those abominably heavy trench shoes in the
+evening and putting on a pair of slippers which she would send down to
+me. She thought that a bath-robe might come in handy for lounging in the
+evening and perhaps after we got comfortably settled in our Southern
+quarters, she might send one of the big, roomy library chairs down to
+me, for she did not approve of one’s sitting on one’s bed the way most
+of us did. She deplored the total lack of chairs about the barracks and
+she was quite sure that taking an ice cold shower out in that horrible
+big tin building would certainly result in innumerable cases of
+influenza, if nothing more serious. She’s a dear old mother and I don’t
+know that I have ever appreciated her so much as I have since I’ve been
+down here.
+
+Then with my visitors caring for themselves for a while, and mother
+chumming up with the always affable Fat, whom she took quite a fancy to,
+I hurried about my work of being re-outfitted with summer uniforms.
+Fortunately they allowed me to retain my overcoat (which I received but
+a few days ago) until we are ready to entrain.
+
+Then came the passes. The officer was successful and we who are to go
+South are given a release from duty until to-morrow night at retreat.
+Other passes were distributed, too, and Fat fortunate for once, yet
+unfortunate, got one to go home until Monday morning. But poor Fat!
+Still the military tailors lag and now that he has the pass that he has
+been trying to get for this last month, he cannot use it, for he is not
+properly uniformed to leave the cantonment, having still just his
+flannel shirt. He tried frantically to borrow parts of a uniform to fit
+him and while he could find a pair of breeches that he could get into, a
+jacket was lacking, so in disgust, and with a most unhappy smile, he
+gave it up and went over to the Y.M. telephone booth to ask his mother
+to come down and visit him over Sunday.
+
+And to-night there are no taps for me, for I am home once more and
+writing this at my own desk. We all came home together and had a bully
+trip and now, after the best dinner I have eaten in many a day, I shall
+see a real show at a real theatre, and sit up as late as I choose and
+when I go to bed I will be between clean sheets again and there will be
+no officers’ whistles to wake me in the morning.
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+Back again, but back to a sad and very unhappy barracks. Fat, poor, poor
+Fat, who felt downcast because he was not going South, has gone on a far
+longer journey. It is the first tragedy that has come into our life here
+in our barracks and with the thoughts of the breaking up of the big
+family on the morrow, and the homesickness, that most of us feel because
+of our all too brief trips home, has cast a gloom over us all.
+
+Unfortunate Fat, done out of using his pass by the slowness of the army
+tailors, telephoned home yesterday to have his mother come out to see
+him. At train time this morning he was at the terminal awaiting her
+arrival. But in the shifting of the cars back and forth in the yard an
+accident happened and Fat, in the way of it, was one of its victims.
+Both his legs were crushed and he was hurried away to the hospital.
+
+Meanwhile, his grey-haired old mother arrived and stood about the
+terminal hour after hour wondering why he did not come for her, and it
+was not until late this afternoon that one of the boys in our company
+thought to go down and try and find her; which, fortunately, was not too
+late to bid her son good-bye.
+
+And now we are on the eve of our departure. As I came through the
+terminal an hour ago the troop train, a long line of nondescript
+coaches, was being made up. As each car was made ready it was shunted
+into line by the ever-grumbling engine and to-morrow at daybreak all
+will be ready for us. Then we will go and some of us will be sorry, and
+some of us will be glad. As for myself, all that I can say is “Adieu,
+camp,” and if the place I am bound for, wherever it may be, holds the
+charms that I’ve found here, I’ll be happy.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+The mere suggestion of troop movements has a thrill to it, and we have
+had a lot of thrills to-day.
+
+[Illustration: I was alone in line]
+
+After a long period of restless waiting, and good-byes to every one and
+everything about the old barracks, came the command to fall in. Then in
+summer uniforms, and each with a big blue barracks bag crowded with
+personal belongings, extra uniform, shoes, blanket and what not, on our
+shoulders, we lined up, shouted last farewells and stepped off, down the
+barracks street and out toward the railroad station. There was no
+whistling nor singing for we were all very solemn, and I was lonesome,
+for I was alone in line, the only member of our entire squad to go.
+
+We came upon other columns of fellows, coming from other companies,
+bound with us for this Southern camp. On we marched to the terminal.
+Here confusion reigned for a while, for hundreds of men in khaki were
+scattered everywhere, all bending under blue duffel bags, and wondering
+what was to happen next.
+
+But soon we were entrained, and then with locomotive whistles hooting,
+and heads bobbing from every car window, we said farewell to The Camp.
+And with the leave-taking our spirits seemed to rise, for there was
+singing and whistling and horse play once more as the big cantonment
+faded from view behind its fringe of pine woods.
+
+Our first impression was that we would travel all the way to Georgia in
+the cars we had been assigned to, but, fortunately, this was not true,
+for after a long and tedious trip we detrained again at a ferry terminal
+in Brooklyn. Here, too, was confusion. It was late in the afternoon, and
+we were hungry. Every candy stand, and handy store was patronized until
+the officers interfered. Then came the big, old fashioned side-wheeled
+ferries, and we were hustled aboard.
+
+Soon the old craft swung out into the river and with churning paddles we
+headed down stream.
+
+It was just sunset. Far down the bay, beyond Governor’s Island and
+Liberty, a great, fiery red disc was setting in a haze of smoke and mist
+from the city, while to our right and left on the river banks, lights
+began to twinkle, and overhead strings of diamonds draped each
+gracefully arching bridge. Past the Navy Yard we swung, with cheers from
+the crews of three destroyers in the river. Tugs and steamers and
+passing sound night boats greeted us with whistles, and we lined the
+rails and cheered back.
+
+Soon we churned under the last of the bridges and began to make our
+tortoise-like way around the Battery. Lights were glimmering through the
+violet haze that shrouded the mass of sky-touching buildings, and in the
+foreground were hurrying throngs of men and women wending their way
+through Battery Park toward the ferries.
+
+Up the North River, the skyline of the huge cities changed and grew more
+impressive, as one building after another came out of the mass and stood
+alone against the blue-black Eastern night sky. Ferries criss-crossing
+in the darkness, leaving sparkling trails of light that danced on the
+water, crowded close to us at times, and the mass of men and women
+huddled on the windswept decks, cheered us on our way. Thus did we say
+our last good-bye to the big city—and we said it solemnly and
+thoughtfully, too, for many of us know that we are going on the long,
+long journey and will never see that skyline again.
+
+The crowds in the terminal, as we hurried from ferry to the railroad
+yard, cheered us, too, and men rushed out to shake hands with us and
+crowded cigarettes and cigars into our pockets as we marched on.
+
+We had been told that the Red Cross would feed us. It did, to the extent
+of a single sandwich and a cup of coffee, hastily snatched as we wended
+our way through the railroad yard to the train.
+
+Long tourist sleepers are our lot. They stood on a siding, dimly lighted
+with a single candle at either end of the car when we climbed into them
+and were assigned to our seats. We are settled now, and rolling swiftly
+across Jersey. Lights have been turned on, and the interior of the car
+looks very strange with the big blue duffel bags swinging from every
+hook and swaying as the train rounds each curve. But we are all very
+quiet, and many of us are thinking. We are all homesick that is certain,
+and hungry, too, and wondering about the future.
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+We are rolling through Virginia into the sunset.
+
+For twenty hours we have been crowded into these cars, and we are
+cramped and tired, but feeling happier with all. Two to a berth, we
+tried to sleep last night. But sleep was impossible. I was up most of
+the night, standing at the upper end of the car looking out the window,
+while my new-found bunkie tried hard to get in a few winks. He wasn’t
+successful.
+
+At midnight we ran through a little station called Brandy, and there in
+a pounding rainstorm, under the light of a smoky, yellow oil lamp, stood
+a solitary soldierly-looking figure, a boy, bare-footed and with head
+uncovered and his rain-soaked cap held over his heart in a salute. He
+alone had been watching for the troop train.
+
+Sometime after daylight, at Charlottesville, our train stopped for
+water. All signs of the rain had cleared, hundreds of boys, black and
+white, and men and women swarmed to the station to greet us. Our
+canteens were passed out of the windows for water, and hot coffee and
+thick sandwiches of home-made bread and jelly and delicious ham were
+given to us by a committee of very old women who had been up since long
+before daylight awaiting our arrival. Rations were served to us after we
+pulled out of the station, consisting of bread and hard crackers, and a
+can of tomatoes and a can of beans for every six men.
+
+By way of diversion we began to play poker for the beans, and a pair of
+jacks left me breakfastless, except for the coffee and sandwich I was
+fortunate enough to get at Charlottesville. And that is all I have had
+since seven o’clock and it is now half-past four.
+
+At one station along the line, where we laid over for a few moments,
+several fellows, acting as Sergeants, were sent out to buy food for our
+company. But the train pulled out without them. Goodness knows where
+they are now, but the saddest part of it is that they didn’t bring back
+the eats.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+We are travelling through a land of gold and red and green, with huge
+dabs of white marking the cotton fields. And we are hungry no longer.
+
+At Cornellia the train stopped for half an hour, and the fellows, all
+but famished, made a wild rush for the door, and sweeping aside such
+obstructions as angry Sergeants took the town by storm. About seven
+hundred soldiers descended upon it, and bought everything in the eating
+line that they could possibly find, even to whole cheeses, huge stalks
+of bananas, and cases of honey. We ate, and we flooded the town with
+money. Never has Cornellia seen such a busy half-hour in its history,
+and never did the stores do such a tremendous business.
+
+We held up the troop train while we satisfied our appetites. But what of
+it! We are happy now, with tight belts and plenty of cigarettes to
+smoke, so why worry!
+
+Never in my life have I seen so many negroes. They swarm about the train
+at every stop we make, chalk their initials on the cars (as every one
+else has done) sing songs, cheer and just bubble over with enthusiasm.
+Last night, while our train was on a siding, an old fellow somehow got
+inside the car and did a wild buck and wing dance in the aisle for
+pennies that were tossed from every bunk. And this morning another old
+fellow, with a bag of cotton on his back, came a little too close to the
+windows of the troop train. Eager hands seized the bag and pulled it
+from his shoulders, and presently the cotton was being distributed among
+the men as souvenirs.
+
+And now we are only twenty miles from Atlanta, and the fellows are
+beginning to pack up their belongings. Some are trying hard to shave in
+a crowded wash-room, for the long train ride has left us all appearing a
+little the worse for wear and we want to enter our new home as
+presentable as possible.
+
+I wonder what this new home will be like? Camp X is the cantonment and I
+am told that it is bigger than the place we left, but if it is half as
+pleasant we will be satisfied.
+
+ THE END
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Conscript 2989, by Irving Crump
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+ <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=utf-8" />
+ <meta content="Conscript 2989" name="DC.Title"/>
+ <meta content="Irving Crump" name="DC.Creator"/>
+ <meta content="en" name="DC.Language"/>
+ <meta content="1918" name="DC.Created"/>
+ <meta name="generator" content="ppgen (1.15) generated Jul 24, 2011 03:33 AM" />
+ <title>Conscript 2989</title>
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+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Conscript 2989, by Irving Crump
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Conscript 2989
+ Experiences of a Drafted Man
+
+Author: Irving Crump
+
+Illustrator: H. B. Martin
+
+Release Date: July 24, 2011 [EBook #36832]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONSCRIPT 2989 ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Roger Frank, Katherine Ward, and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i001' id='i001'></a>
+<img src="images/illus01.jpg" alt="I summoned “Local Board 163” in Court Martial proceedings" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>I summoned “Local Board 163” in Court Martial proceedings</span>
+</div>
+<hr class='hr' />
+<div class='center'>
+<p><span style='font-size:1.4em;font-weight:bold;'>CONSCRIPT 2989</span></p>
+<p>&#160;</p>
+<p><span style='font-weight:bold;'>EXPERIENCES OF A DRAFTED MAN</span></p>
+<p>&#160;</p>
+<p>ILLUSTRATED BY</p>
+<p>H. B. MARTIN</p>
+</div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i002' id='i002'></a>
+<img src='images/illus02.jpg' alt='' title=''/><br />
+</div>
+<div class='center'>
+<p><span style='font-size:smaller;'>NEW YORK</span></p>
+<p>DODD, MEAD AND COMPANY</p>
+<p><span style='font-size:smaller;'>1918</span></p>
+</div>
+<hr class='hr' />
+<div class='center'>
+<p><span style='font-size:smaller;'>COPYRIGHT, 1918, BY</span></p>
+<p><span style='font-size:smaller;'>DODD, MEAD AND COMPANY, INC.</span></p>
+<p>&#160;</p>
+<p><span style='font-size:smaller;'>Service Flag Design on Cover Patented November 6, 1917</span></p>
+<p>&#160;</p>
+<p><span style='font-size:smaller;'>Reproduced by Permission of Annin &amp; Co., Flag Makers, New York</span></p>
+</div>
+<hr class='hr' />
+<div class='center'>
+<p>TO</p>
+<p>MY MOTHER AND FATHER</p>
+</div>
+<p style='margin-left: 2em;margin-right: 2em;'>
+and every other Mother and Father, who spend hours
+wondering about the welfare of their son, this book is
+dedicated. And with it comes the assurance that life
+in the big cantonment contains a full measure of real
+happiness, and that all hardships are mitigated by a
+sense of humor which develops even in the worst of
+pessimists. We are contented, for to compensate for
+the absence of you and all that you mean, comes the
+knowledge that we are doing everything that brave men
+and women, the world over, would have us do at times
+like these. We are doing a man’s work and by the
+token of the service flag in your window you should
+know that the days of patched trousers, darned stocking,
+of toy fire engines, play soldiers, and noisy drums,
+were not spent in vain.
+</p>
+<hr class='hr' />
+<h1><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_1'></a>1</span>CONSCRIPT 2989</h1>
+<h2>Thursday:</h2>
+<p>
+Once when I was an enthusiastic freshman
+(it seems ages ago) I joined a Latin society
+that had for its inspiration the phrase, <em>forsan
+haec olim meminisse juvabit</em>.
+</p>
+<p>
+All I can remember about the society is the
+motto, and there is nothing particularly pleasant
+about the recollection, either. But somehow
+to-night that fool phrase comes back to me
+and makes a pessimist of me right off. I wonder
+how pleasant these things are going to be and
+whether I will want to remember them hereafter.
+Perhaps I won’t have much choice. I’ll
+probably remember them whether I want to or
+not. Already my first eight hours of active
+service as Conscript 2989 have some sharp edges
+sticking out which I am likely to remember,
+though many of them are far from pleasant.
+</p>
+<p>
+I am now truly a member of the army of the
+great unwashed and unwashable—no, I take that
+back. They are washable. I saw a grizzly old
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_2'></a>2</span>
+Sergeant herding four of them out to the washroom
+this evening. Each of them carried a
+formidable square of yellow soap and a most
+unhappy expression. But the Sergeant looked
+pleased with his detail.
+</p>
+<p>
+Never in my wildest flights of fancy can I
+picture some of these men as soldiers. Slavs,
+Poles, Italians, Greeks, a sprinkling of Chinese
+and Japs—Jews with expressionless faces, and
+what not, are all about me. I’m in a barracks
+with 270 of them, and so far I’ve found a half
+dozen men who could speak English without an
+accent. Is it possible to make soldiers of these
+fellows? Well, if muscle and bone (principally
+bone) is what is wanted for material, they have
+got it here with a vengeance. But, then, from
+the looks of things they have been doing wonders
+and they may make creditable soldiers of
+them at that. Goodness knows, they may even
+make a soldier out of me, which would be a
+miracle. Here’s hoping.
+</p>
+<h2>Friday:</h2>
+<p>
+I only need to glance back over the page I
+wrote last night to see how I felt. This conscripting
+must have gotten under my skin a
+little deeper than I thought. I’ll admit I was
+homesick, and I guess it made me a little testy.
+I think I really should tear that page out and
+begin over. It isn’t exactly fair, and, besides,
+it doesn’t fulfil the function of a diary, anyway,
+which, I take it, is a record of events and things—not
+a criticism of everybody in general and
+an opportunity to give vent to disagreeable
+feelings.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_3'></a>3</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i003' id='i003'></a>
+<img src="images/illus03.jpg" alt="Never in my wildest flights of fancy can I picture some of these men as soldiers" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Never in my wildest flights of fancy can<br/>I picture some of these men as soldiers</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_4'></a>4</span></div>
+<p>
+From a “close-up” view yesterday may have
+seemed like a trying day, but to-night it looks
+a lot different and a lot more interesting. I
+must confess that all the “good-byes,” and the
+bands, and the weeping mothers and sweethearts,
+and the handshakes, and the pompous
+old turtles (who dodged the draft in the Civil
+War or bought substitutes) who slapped you
+on the back and told you how they wished they
+were young again, along with the arrival of
+the “Kaiser Kanners,” who unquestionably
+were “kanners” of another variety, and the
+parade and the Home Guard and the dozen
+and one “Comfort Kits” that every one handed
+you, and the mystery of what was to come, and
+the scared look on every one’s face, including
+my own, and the vacant feeling in the pit of
+one’s stomach, superinduced by sandwiches
+and coffee, fudge, oranges and chocolates in
+lieu of a real meal, did get on my nerves.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_5'></a>5</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i004' id='i004'></a>
+<img src="images/illus04.jpg" alt="Every one of them had a fiendish grin on his face" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Every one of them had a fiendish grin on his face</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_6'></a>6</span></div>
+<p>
+But, hang it, when I look back we got a great
+farewell, at that. And the local Board did
+things up mighty well. I find myself possessed
+of a razor, razor strop, wrist watch, two
+pocket knives, unbreakable mirror, drinking
+cup and a lot of other things that I never
+expected to own or need. I haven’t the remotest
+idea where many of them came from.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then there was that long, almost never ending
+train ride, which seemed to be taking me
+on an unbearable distance from the place I
+really felt I belonged.
+</p>
+<p>
+And the arrival; all I saw when I tumbled off
+the train were thousands of unpainted buildings
+and millions of fellows in khaki, and every one
+of them had a fiendish grin on his face as he
+shouted: “Oh, you rookey. Wait, just wait;
+you’ll get yours! When they bring on the
+needle. Oh, the needle.”
+</p>
+<p>
+I had a vague idea of what the “needle”
+might be, but it wasn’t pleasant to hear about
+it from every one I met. But I guess there
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_7'></a>7</span>
+were a lot of fellows who were not quite
+certain what this threatening “needle” was.
+Foolishly two of them asked one of the Sergeants
+who met us at the train and what they
+heard in reply to their queries made them paler
+than they were before, if that were possible.
+Thereafter, for the rest of the afternoon and
+evening, the “needle” was the subject of
+earnest conversation among us all, and the
+doubts and misgivings about that instrument
+of torture, coupled with a thoroughly good case
+of homesickness on the part of every one of us
+helped to make a pleasant (?) evening. And
+that most of us worried until far into the night
+is certain. I know I did, and the Italian on
+my left cried himself to sleep, and didn’t try
+to hide his unhappiness either. Oh, it was a
+delightful evening, all things considered.
+</p>
+<p>
+Forty-seven of us, all from my own district,
+came down together, and while we remained in
+one group there was a measure of consolation
+to be had for us all. But our hopes that we
+would stay together at camp were dashed
+immediately we got off the train. In fact we
+were so thoroughly split up that I managed to
+get into a squad composed entirely of foreigners, and
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_8'></a>8</span>
+I’m still with them. But the
+prospects of a change are excellent.
+</p>
+<p>
+Quite as docile as sheep, and just as ignorant,
+we were marched down one camp street
+after another. My friends of foreign extraction,
+with due regard for anything that looked
+like a uniform, saluted every one that passed,
+and they were tolerably busy until we were
+halted outside of our present abode, a big two-story,
+unpainted barracks building.
+</p>
+<p>
+Here mess kits were served to each of us, and
+though we did not know the combination that
+unlocked the mysterious looking things, we
+were glad to get them, because they added so
+much to the dozen and one things we were
+already carrying. Then, completely smothering
+us, came two tremendous horse blankets
+and a comforter. Those comforters were
+everything their name implies. Not only did
+they afford warmth, but amusement as well.
+They ranged in shades from baby blue and
+pink to cerise and lavender, and some one with
+a sense of humour must have distributed them.
+The stout, pudgy, black-haired Italian to my
+left reposes under the voluminous folds of a
+beautiful pink creation, and across the room
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_9'></a>9</span>
+sits a huge Irishman, with hands as big as
+hams and shoulders of a giant, with a baby
+blue comforter wrapped about him. Mine is
+a bewitching old rose. But, believe me, it’s
+there with the quality if it isn’t much on looks.
+I found that out last night.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then, after the Sergeant showed us where we bunked and where we could
+expect to find something to eat about supper time, every one left us
+severely alone, which was mostly what we wanted, because we all had a
+lot on our mind between homesickness and that blessed “needle.” But
+there was some work to do, such as stuffing mattresses with hay,
+sweeping out the barracks and similar occupations until bed time.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i005' id='i005'></a>
+<img src="images/illus05.jpg" alt="A baby blue comforter wrapped about him." title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>A baby blue comforter wrapped about him.</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+Some one, who had evidently heard some
+weird tales about the punishment meted out to
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_10'></a>10</span>
+those who overslept at camp, brought an alarm
+clock along with him, and the blooming thing
+went off at 4 <span style='font-size:smaller;'>A.M.</span> Of course we got up,
+switched the lights on over head, and proceeded
+to get dressed with that resigned now-what-are-you-going-to-do-with-us
+air.
+</p>
+<p>
+But dressing was interrupted by a string of
+the most beautiful cusses I ever heard, coming
+downstairs just in advance of a mighty mad
+looking Sergeant:
+</p>
+<p>
+“Who in —— tarnation bow-wows has got
+that —— alarm clock? Pitch it out the ——
+window, and git back to bed.”
+</p>
+<p>
+It went and we went. But that’s as far as
+we could go. Thoughts of the “needle” and
+other forms of torture which we were to face in
+a few short hours kept most of us awake until
+a quarter after five, when every officer in camp
+began to blow letter-carrier whistles. Then we
+all got up and were introduced to some physical
+exercises guaranteed to stretch every muscle in
+our makeup. I took a cold shower bath after
+mine, and was the object of interest of the
+entire barracks. Great stuff (I mean the
+shower).
+</p>
+<p>
+Most of us might have been tolerably happy
+after that, if it hadn’t been for the fact that
+every man in uniform made some evil suggestion
+about the “needle.” And when they
+saw us all, white and corpsey looking and more
+or less unsteady on our legs, line up in front of
+the barracks and march off under our Second
+Lieutenant, the groans and sorry faces they
+feigned were enough to make one’s blood run
+cold. And then we got the “needle.”
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_11'></a>11</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i006' id='i006'></a>
+<img src="images/illus06.jpg" alt="An alarm clock went off at 4 A.M." title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>An alarm clock went off at 4 A.M.</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_12'></a>12</span></div>
+<p>
+I, for one, was disappointed, and so were
+most of the rest of us. But there were a few
+who didn’t give themselves a chance to be disappointed.
+They promptly fainted: not because
+of the injection but because of the state
+of their nerves which they all admitted afterward.
+There were a few things about the
+examination calculated to scare a man to death
+such as the question: “In case you are shot
+and killed to whom do you wish six months’
+pay to be sent?” Many of us stammered a
+bit before answering.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_13'></a>13</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i007' id='i007'></a>
+<img src="images/illus07.jpg" alt="Jabbed at the iodine mark and pulled the trigger" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Jabbed at the iodine mark and pulled the trigger</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+After that we stripped, lined up and started
+on our way. Then measured, marked and
+finger-printed, we arrived before a physician
+who stamped a quarter section under the left
+shoulder blade with a sponge covered with
+iodine, while another one scratched the skin on
+our upper arm to mark the acreage to be covered
+by a vaccination. We moved on to two
+more physicians, and while one dug a hunk out
+of our arm and inserted vaccine in place of the
+skin removed, the other man, with a villainously
+long hypodermic, jabbed at the iodine mark and
+pulled the trigger. And now, by George, if
+any one else around here tries to kid me into
+worrying about anything at all, I’m going to
+talk back proper. They sure had me scared
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_14'></a>14</span>
+stiff and I’ll admit it. Why, hang it, I
+would rather have had typhoid than face
+that “needle” before I really knew what it
+amounted to. But here I am, with germs
+variously estimated at from 15,000 to 250,000
+circulating around inside of me, due to said
+“needle,” and aside from a little wooziness in
+the head, and a sore shoulder, I’m quite contented
+and ready to turn in. Good-night.
+</p>
+<h2>Saturday:</h2>
+<p>
+The serum injections of yesterday produced
+some queer, and in one case unfortunate, results.
+Last night after taps were sounded and lights
+were out, I lay awake a long time in spite of
+the fact I was very tired.
+</p>
+<p>
+Couldn’t understand it, and my arm and back
+were as sore as could be. Hour after hour
+wore on, and I couldn’t get to sleep. Some
+did, however, and I had a regular frog’s chorus
+of snores to keep me company. I became a
+veritable specialist in snores and wheezes and
+grunts. Every time I heard a new variety I
+formed mental pictures of the men who probably
+made them.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_15'></a>15</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+Then the chorus was interrupted by some
+one not far from me who called out mournfully:
+“Oh, my back, my back! The needle!”
+Then in sharper tones: “Count off. 1-2-3-4.”
+I wondered what horrors his overwrought
+nerves were causing him to dream of.
+</p>
+<p>
+But when I did get to sleep I slept soundly,
+certainly, for they told me this morning that
+one chap had become seriously ill, and had been
+carried from the barracks to an ambulance and
+whisked away to the hospital sometime during
+the small hours of the morning. It seems that
+he had an excess of germs circulating around
+inside of him, due to the fact that he did not
+know enough to move on after the doctor had
+given him the first injection, and the physician,
+looking only for the nearest iodine spot, shot
+him twice in the same place.
+</p>
+<p>
+However, I am reasonably certain I’ll sleep
+to-night all right, for I’ve been pulling stumps
+all day, or rather during the time I wasn’t
+learning to recognize my right foot from my
+left, and a few other things that every man
+thinks he knows until some one takes the pains
+to expose his ignorance. Oh, I have the qualities
+of a really capable soldier in me—if some
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_16'></a>16</span>
+one can find them. As an infantryman I’m a
+much better stump puller. I proved that this
+afternoon. I have a beautiful double handful
+of blisters, not to mention a ruined suit of
+clothes and hopeless shoes, to my credit in this
+war of exterminating the Hun. I hope we get
+uniforms soon, because if we don’t, I’ll be going
+about clad in my old rose comforter and some
+summer underclothes.
+</p>
+<p>
+Stump pulling is rough on clothes, but it
+certainly is an appetite builder. I’ve discovered
+already that it is good policy to be
+among the first on line with a mess kit, then
+if you can bolt your beef a-la-mode fast enough,
+and get outside and wash up your kit, you stand
+a good chance of joining the last of the line,
+thereby getting a second helping. Indeed,
+several fellows have it down to such a science
+already, that they get three helpings before the
+cook begins to say things.
+</p>
+<p>
+The barracks is beginning to look picturesque.
+The atmosphere of a western
+mining camp, arranged for stage purposes,
+prevails. The Italians, swarthy-faced, heavy-featured
+fellows, for the most part, gather in
+little groups, smoke villainous pipes and play
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_17'></a>17</span>
+cards incessantly, whenever they are allowed
+much time in the barracks. Our Semitic
+friends linger in the vicinity of the door that
+leads to the mess hall and kitchen, especially
+about meal time. And their mess kits are
+always handy. Nicknames have already become
+common, and we have among us such
+worthies as Fat, Doc, Peck’s Bad Boy, Toney,
+Binkie, Shortie, Shrimp, Simp and Pop. The
+last name has been applied to me, inspired, no
+doubt, by the suggestion of baldness aloft.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i008' id='i008'></a>
+<img src="images/illus08.jpg" alt="Italians gather in little groups" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Italians gather in little groups</span>
+</div>
+<h2><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_18'></a>18</span>Sunday:</h2>
+<p>
+Didn’t sleep much last night, for some
+reason. Think I was too tired. This is the
+third night I’ve lost time. Beginning to feel
+it now. But no one else seemed to sleep well
+either, or at least they didn’t go to sleep right
+off. Lights out at ten and all supposed to
+be “tucked in.” Then came various remarks
+from the darkness; choice, unprintable remarks
+about the Kaiser, the Government, the Sergeant,
+certain Corporals, who doubtless heard
+all their well-wishers had to say, but could not
+identify the speakers. Indeed, it struck me that
+the fellows had hit upon a choice way of telling
+certain non-coms what they thought of them,
+without the possibility of getting in bad. Then
+arguments started in the darkness, and the
+vocal combatants were urged on by catcalls and
+encouraging yells from various sections of the
+unlighted room, and presently shoes started
+flying.
+</p>
+<p>
+About that time the Top Sergeant upstairs
+woke up, and decided to investigate. Silence
+fell in the big room when the stairs, creaking
+under his weight, gave warning that the crusty
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_19'></a>19</span>
+old veteran of fifteen years’ service with the
+Regulars was on his way down.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i009' id='i009'></a>
+<img src="images/illus09.jpg" alt="The Top Sergeant made the round of the cots" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>The Top Sergeant made the round of the cots</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+The door opened and a pocket flashlight
+began to travel from cot to cot. But strangely
+enough every one was slumbering contentedly,
+and some even snoring. The Top Sergeant
+made the round of the cots, reached the door
+and “doused his glim.”
+</p>
+<p>
+Then with a most impressive introduction of
+profanity he remarked that “The next ——, ——, son-of-a-bandmaster,
+who started anything would
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_20'></a>20</span>
+spend the rest of the night out on
+the porch in his underclothes,” whereupon
+some wag from the darkness replied: “Put t’
+Kaiser out there, he started it.” While others
+sweetly remarked: “Good-night Ser<em>geant</em>.”
+“Pleasant dreams, dear.” “Come kiss me
+good-night.” and “Don’t forget to tuck us
+all in.”
+</p>
+<p>
+But things eventually subsided and I dozed
+off, only to be awakened later by some one
+kissing me on the cheek. It was startling to
+say the least, and I sat up. I thought perhaps
+the Sergeant had come back to say good-night.
+Then it happened again, only this time on my
+hand, and I heard an eager little whine, and a
+sniff-sniff-sniffing that told me plainly a dog
+was beside my cot.
+</p>
+<p>
+I chirped encouragingly and up he came.
+Then he dived between the blankets and burrowing
+deep worked his way down to the foot
+of my cot. Evidently he had slept in army cots
+before. All my efforts to dislodge him were
+futile and I knew that unless I got up and unmade
+my bed he would not come out. So I left
+him, and he in gratitude kept my feet warm.
+</p>
+<p>
+This morning he appeared at reveille, waking
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_21'></a>21</span>
+me up with his frantic efforts to dig himself to
+light again and kissing me good-morning, by
+way of showing his appreciation. He was just
+a plain yellow dog, with a lop ear and a habit
+of wagging all over when he could not get
+enough expression in his stump of a tail.
+Attached to a strap that he wore in place of
+a collar was a tag on which was scrawled:
+“Presented to Local Board No. 163—Hold the
+fort for we are coming.” I concluded that if
+they held onto the fort, when they arrived, as
+well as they held onto their dog it wasn’t
+worth while having them come at all.
+</p>
+<p>
+“Local Board No. 163” stood guard on the
+foot of my bed, or rather, sat guard, until I
+got dressed, and although he created no end of
+interest among the rest of the fellows in the
+room, who whistled and called to him, he refused
+to leave his new-found “bunkie.” He
+just sat tight. He even stayed when I got up
+to go, but he looked at me with a most reproachful
+air, as if to say, “I think a lot of you even
+though you do want to leave me.”
+</p>
+<p>
+He remained after every one had left the
+room and when I returned an hour later to get
+my mess kit for breakfast, he was still there.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_22'></a>22</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+But the rattle of mess tins must have suggested
+something to him for when I got up to
+go this time he was right beside me, and he
+even braved the crush at the mess-hall door to
+stick near me.
+</p>
+<p>
+That dog never had so much to eat in all his
+young life as he got for breakfast that morning.
+First he visited our Japanese cook, who liked
+him and proved it by giving him a piece of meat.
+Then he visited the kitchen police, who found
+something for him, after which he made the
+rounds of the mess tables, coming back to me
+actually bloated with food. He looked up at
+me and I’ll swear he grinned and tried to say:
+“This is the life—eh, Ol’ Top?”
+</p>
+<p>
+“Local Board No. 163” has already become
+a favourite, but with all his petting from his
+many well-wishers, he seems to want to call me
+Boss. He’s on the cot beside me now as I
+write, snoring with disgusting impoliteness, but
+I guess, being just a plain yellow dog, he don’t
+know any better.
+</p>
+<p>
+This has been a day of visitors, and little
+work. Early this morning they began to
+arrive. I never saw so many motor cars anywhere,
+except at football games, or the races.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_23'></a>23</span>
+And girls; thousands of them, and pretty, too.
+But shucks, I’m outclassed. In fact I began to
+feel like my dog to-day. I’ll admit it was
+pretty soft for the fellows who had uniforms,
+but for the poor tramps like myself, who still
+wear their civilian clothes (or what is left of
+them, which isn’t very much all told) it was
+sort of a lonesome day.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i010' id='i010'></a>
+<img src="images/illus10.jpg" alt="Pretty soft for the fellows who had uniforms" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Pretty soft for the fellows who had uniforms</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+Then there were the lucky fellows who had
+passes to leave camp. They looked fine, tramping
+down the road toward the station. Of
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_24'></a>24</span>
+course they were all uniformed; they are not
+allowed to leave camp unless they are.
+</p>
+<p>
+But “Local Board No. 163” and I take consolation
+in the fact that perhaps next Sunday
+we will be all spick and span in a nice new uniform,
+and then we’ll strike for a pass, too, and
+go home and swagger about a bit ourselves.
+</p>
+<p>
+Feeling delightfully tired and sleepy; and I
+know I’ll “press some of the creases out o’ my
+blankets” to-night. This place seems almost
+comfortable and homelike now, and the men—well
+I’ve changed my original opinion of them
+considerably. They all (or most of them) have
+their hearts in the right place, and there aren’t
+so many muckers as I thought there might be.
+In fact I’m beginning to like things mighty
+well; really enjoying myself. Only, hang it,
+I think I’m getting a good case of hives.
+Haven’t been afflicted thus for about five years.
+If they keep up I’ll report to the hospital
+shortly. “Come on ‘Local Board No. 163’
+we’ll turn in.”
+</p>
+<h2><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_25'></a>25</span>Monday:</h2>
+<p>
+Several things of importance happened to-day.
+For one thing we got some clothes. I
+say <em>some</em> clothes advisedly, for I’m not all
+clothed yet, being minus such important articles
+as an undershirt, socks and shoes. But
+those I brought from home, though sanctified
+and made holey by arduous labours in other
+fields, will do for the present. I possess a pair
+of winter breeches and a summer coat, but what
+matters that. It is sufficient to know that they
+fit, which is not the case in several instances,
+notably in that of friends Fat and Shrimp, who,
+I have learned, were not optimistic from the
+first about being fitted properly. It seems that
+from years of experience they have both
+learned never to expect to be fitted anywhere,
+anyhow. Fat’s shirt covers him with an effort,
+but that is all. He can’t find a shoehorn with
+which to get into his breeches. As for Shrimp:
+his belt is pulled tight about his chest and the
+sleeves of his tunic are rolled up to where his
+elbows should be, only to disclose the tips of
+his fingers.
+</p>
+<p>
+But I must confess to a grave error right
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_26'></a>26</span>
+here. It startled me this evening at retreat.
+Indeed, several things startled me this evening
+at retreat, including my fast developing case
+of hives.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i011' id='i011'></a>
+<img src="images/illus11.jpg" alt="His belt is pulled tight about his chest" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>His belt is pulled tight about his chest</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+A few days ago I made some rather boorish
+and very sarcastic remarks about the possibilities
+of ever making soldiers out of the men
+I found myself among. I humbly take it all
+back and eat mud by way of apology. Khaki,
+a campaign hat and a shave, together with a
+certain amount of training in how to stand up
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_27'></a>27</span>
+straight and step off correctly, have made a vast
+difference. Why, hang it, I’m mighty proud to
+belong to this company. Jews, Italians, Poles,
+etc., all look like fighters; act like fighters; and
+a lot of them are fighters, too. Why they are
+soldiers already, and glad of it. Which leads
+me to state quite modestly
+the surprising fact that I
+think I am nearly a soldier,
+too, and gol-dinged
+set up about it. Honestly
+we looked fine this evening.
+What if there were
+a few misfits? A process
+of barter and exchange
+has already eliminated a
+great deal of that (save
+in the cases of Fat and
+Shrimp, who have gone back to civilian clothes
+until special uniforms are built for them) and
+when we lined up and snapped to attention
+while the band over on Tower Hill played “The
+Star Spangled Banner” and the old flag came
+slowly down, we looked like real soldiers every
+inch. We knew it, too, and I’ll bet there wasn’t
+a prouder company in the entire camp.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i012' id='i012'></a>
+<img src="images/illus12.jpg" alt="Back to civilian clothes until a special uniform is built" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Back to civilian clothes until a special uniform is built</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_28'></a>28</span></div>
+<p>
+Of course, I had to gum up the ceremony.
+But I guess I’ll pay for it to-morrow. Here’s
+how it happened:
+</p>
+<p>
+We’ve been drilling, drilling, drilling, all day
+to-day, drilling with a vengeance, and now we
+can do squads right and right front into line
+with as much pep and vigour as a company of
+Regulars. Our Sergeant said so, which is some
+admission for the old moss-back to make. Of
+course, we were tired. I was about ready to
+drop in my tracks when five o’clock came, which
+is time for evening parade or retreat; a very
+impressive ceremony by the way. My hives
+had been bothering me all day, and every time
+we were at ease, I got in some likely scratches
+in itchy places.
+</p>
+<p>
+One beautiful lump developed right under my
+arm just at five o’clock. Holy smokes, how it
+did itch! It was just as if something had
+staked an oil claim right there and wasn’t
+losing any time about drilling a well. Of
+course, standing at attention a chap can’t
+scratch, at least he’s not supposed to—but I
+did. I tried to show extreme fortitude. I
+stood and stood and stood, and the darned
+thing kept boring and boring and boring. Then
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_29'></a>29</span>
+when the Lieutenants had their backs turned
+and stood at salute while the flag came down, I
+took a chance and scratched.
+</p>
+<p>
+That First Lieutenant of ours either has eyes in the back of his head or
+else the Sergeant is a tattletale. Anyhow, after the ceremonies and
+before we were dismissed, I was commanded to step out, whereupon I was
+given a most beautiful call down, after which I said, “thank you, sir”
+to a detail as kitchen police, for the next week to come starting
+to-morrow.
+</p>
+<p>
+When I got back here to my barracks the first thing I did was to peel
+off my shirt and look for that hive. I caught him. And then the whole
+terrible plot to get me detailed as kitchen policeman was revealed.
+“Local Board No. 163” has fleas; or, rather, he had ’em. I’ve got ’em
+now—no, wrong again. I got rid of them, or I hope I did.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i013' id='i013'></a>
+<img src="images/illus13.jpg" alt="I picked him up in one hand and a cake of yellow soap in the other." title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>I picked him up in one hand and a<br/>cake of yellow soap in the other.</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_30'></a>30</span></div>
+<p>
+Upon making the hideous discovery, I summoned
+“Local Board No. 163” in court martial
+proceedings. He was guilty; I could see it by
+the way his spirit sagged in the middle when I
+began to cross-question him. I picked him up
+in one hand and a cake of yellow soap and a
+towel in the other, and we proceeded toward the
+shower baths. Bur-r-r-r but that water was
+cold. “Local Board No. 163” didn’t enjoy it
+either, but I could with justice assure him that
+this form of punishment hurt me as much as it
+did him, and what is more I am likely to suffer
+a heap worse to-morrow.
+</p>
+<p>
+“Local Board No. 163,” you sleep <em>under</em> the
+bed to-night.
+</p>
+<h2>Tuesday:</h2>
+<p>
+Too blasted tired to write to-night. I did a
+whole winter’s work this morning. Shovelled
+nine tons (almost) of coal into the coal bin, as
+a starter. Then peeled a sack of potatoes,
+scrubbed an acre of floor and a half-acre of
+table tops and benches, washed twenty ash cans,
+and other kitchen utensils and—oh, I’m too
+tired now, think I’ll wait until to-morrow.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_31'></a>31</span></div>
+<p>
+“Local Board No. 163” sleeps <em>out on the porch</em> to-night.
+</p>
+<h2>Wednesday:</h2>
+<p>
+Still kitchen policing. Yesterday I thought
+I had pulled some job when I peeled an ash can
+full of potatoes, but that was nothing. To-day
+I got a better one. I had to peel the same
+amount of potatoes, only they were in a washboiler
+this time. Yes, right off the fire. I
+can’t see why the Government has to serve
+potatoes with the jackets off anyway. Why
+don’t they let the men peel them? They are
+just as well able to do it as we are. If some
+one ever wants to invent a choice way of punishing
+refractory prisoners in jail I suggest
+they send said refractors into the kitchen and
+give them the gentle job of peeling hot potatoes,
+by the washboilerful.
+</p>
+<p>
+I have a side partner on the kitchen police.
+His name is O’Flynn and he runs into even
+better luck than I do. To-day he shared the
+job of peeling “hot ones” with me. Yesterday
+while I had the little task of peeling ’em raw,
+he was handed the nice detail of attending to
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_32'></a>32</span>
+twelve pounds of onions; a tearful occasion,
+until some one with a conscience suggested that
+he get a bucket of water and peel them under
+water. O’Flynn got the water, with the remark
+that if he waited just a little longer the
+onion pan would have been full of tears,
+which he assumed would have served just as
+well.
+</p>
+<p>
+O’Flynn is kitchen policing because he tried
+to come into the barracks after taps. Lights
+out at ten and O’Flynn arrived about 2 <span style='font-size:smaller;'>G.M.</span>
+He avoided the fire-guard successfully and went
+around to the back of the barracks. There he
+jimmied a window with his pocket knife and got
+it opened, only to have it fall on his neck when
+he was about half-way in. By way of exercise
+he put his elbow through it. Then to add to
+the situation he found himself in the darkened
+mess hall instead of the dormitory, and the
+noise he made when he knocked over several
+benches naturally grated on the Sergeant’s
+nerves. Said Sergeant arrived in the hall in
+his union suit about the time O’Flynn had
+untangled himself, and, after cussing him out to
+perfection, he handed the Irishman a week at
+kitchen policing.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_33'></a>33</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+“And now,” said O’Flynn, “t’ next time I come
+in through t’ windey, I’ll stay out.”
+</p>
+<p>
+A week of this and I’ll be able to qualify as
+a first rate housekeeper for a lumber camp.
+Already I can lay down a few very necessary
+rules which the average housewife will appreciate,
+as for instance:—
+</p>
+<p>
+1. Never take it for granted that a man has
+only one appetite. We have two hundred and
+seventy men here, but they carry around an
+aggregate of six hundred appetites.
+</p>
+<p>
+2. Never plunge your hands into an ash can
+full of greasy water without first removing
+your wrist watch.
+</p>
+<p>
+3. Never attempt to mop up after your men
+folk. Just turn the hose on, lash the nozzle to
+a convenient table leg and walk away and forget
+about it.
+</p>
+<p>
+4. In carrying out a pan full of hot ashes
+never grab the handle. Thrust a stick through
+it, it saves the temper and the floor.
+</p>
+<p>
+5. Never let any one kid you into trying to
+take the black off the kitchen pans with sapolio,
+rather throw the pans away.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_34'></a>34</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i014' id='i014'></a>
+<img src="images/illus14.jpg" alt="Never let anyone kid you into trying to take the black off the kitchen pans" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Never let anyone kid you into trying to<br/>take the black off the kitchen pans</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+Delightfully brief and entertaining job, that
+of removing the black from ash cans that are
+used to cook soup in. Our Mess Sergeant, the
+pirate, noticed that for about three seconds
+during this afternoon I wasn’t doing anything
+in particular, so he gave me a cake of sapolio
+and a mop and told me to get busy and shine
+up the outside of the pots and pans and get all
+the black off. I went to it and stuck—until our
+Jap cook, the slant-eyed angel, came in about
+two hours later and told me the honourable ash
+cans always got blacked up again so what’s the
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_35'></a>35</span>
+use; and anyhow he wanted to use the mop. I
+almost kissed him.
+</p>
+<p>
+Thank goodness the coal shovelling is all over
+with. Finished it yesterday. To-day during
+my moments of leisure I split a few cords of
+kindling wood and carried it into the kitchen,
+but I like splitting wood better than heaving
+coal when it comes to making a choice.
+</p>
+<p>
+I’ve been very popular with “Local Board
+No. 163,” since I’ve been in the kitchen.
+Honestly, if that dog had intelligence enough,
+I could almost believe that he induced that flea
+to start this dirty work, for he’s the only one
+in the whole company who has benefited by it.
+He hangs around the galley all the time and is
+waxing fat, prosperous and greasy; greasy because
+he got in the way of some dishwater that
+was being emptied out the back door. And
+now I’ll have to give him another scrubbing
+before we turn in, or he’ll be crawling in
+under my blankets again.
+</p>
+<p>
+Strange I haven’t received any letters yet.
+Some chaps are lucky. Letters seem to make
+a big difference in things, even if it’s only
+listening in on some other fellow’s. Every
+one reads letters out loud so that we can all
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_36'></a>36</span>
+enjoy them, for letters, no matter whom they
+are from, are real events here and one always
+gets a sinking feeling when he discovers there
+aren’t any for him.
+</p>
+<h2>Thursday:</h2>
+<p>
+Real luck at last. No more kitchen policing,
+thank goodness. It all happened thus:
+</p>
+<p>
+About the time we had cleaned up the
+remains of breakfast and I was getting ready
+to turn out for “settin’ ups,” along comes the
+Captain with two Lieutenants in tow, all with
+official looking papers. We lined up and he
+looked us all over very critically. Then he
+read:
+</p>
+<p>
+“Any members of this company qualified to
+fill the following positions, step one pace,” and
+a list of occupations followed that included
+everything from barber to horse trainer and
+stage carpenter. Quite a few of us stepped
+out. About ten of the Italian contingent responded
+at the word barber. Fat came forward
+as stage carpenter, and when he said
+artist I stepped three paces forward instead
+of one and, saluting, handed him my
+recommendation for the Camouflage Corps. I knew
+I wasn’t doing quite the proper thing. But
+you see we were all young and innocent of such
+things as military courtesy, and the Captain
+overlooked the fact that one pace didn’t mean
+three, and after he had mentally debated the
+question of calling me down in front of the
+company and had given me the benefit of inexperience,
+he read the recommendation.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_37'></a>37</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i015' id='i015'></a>
+<img src="images/illus15.jpg" alt="Fat was looking for the same barracks" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Fat was looking for the same barracks</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_38'></a>38</span></div>
+<p>
+The result was that I was ordered to report
+immediately to the 2-6 Company, 5-2 Depot
+Battalion. And with visions of avoiding physical
+exercises for about two hours and the preparing
+of a midday meal, I needed no urging.
+I gathered up my bed, hay mattress, blankets
+and all and proceeded to find the barracks of
+the 2-6 Company, 5-2 Depot Battalion.
+</p>
+<p>
+Of course, it had to be located at the other
+end of the twenty-four square miles of reservation.
+But I had company. Fat, loaded down
+like a dromedary under bed, blankets, a suitcase
+and all, was looking for the same barracks.
+So we started on our wanderings together,
+hopeful of finding our new home before dinner
+was served.
+</p>
+<p>
+We found it. And we found a lot of other
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_39'></a>39</span>
+fellows looking for the same home. It seems
+this Depot Battalion, of which I am now a part,
+is composed entirely of specialists, lawyers,
+linguists, engineers, artists, architects, carpenters
+and what not, and just about the time
+we were being transferred, other specialists
+were being selected from other companies and
+sent on their way to the Headquarters Divisions
+of the various regiments. So our corner
+of the camp has been quite popular all day,
+with men staggering in under loads of personal
+belongings like a lot of gipsies looking
+for new places to hang their O.D’s.
+</p>
+<p>
+We, I mean Fat and myself, are among a
+different class of fellows now and this moving
+business has changed my opinion of the camp.
+From a hit or miss proposition as it first appeared,
+it has become a very systematic and
+well-organized cantonment. It is being worked
+out like a gigantic piece of machinery and there
+isn’t any question in my mind now but that we
+will all, sooner or later, fit into the places where
+we will be able to serve the Government best.
+Here I have been trying for months to discover
+how I can get into the Camouflage Corps, which
+so far as I could learn was a mythical organization
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_40'></a>40</span>
+which no one knew very much about.
+Meanwhile, I have been hoping to keep out of
+the draft army for fear of being side-tracked
+and given a bayonet,
+instead of a
+paint brush, to
+beat the Huns
+with.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i016' id='i016'></a>
+<img src="images/illus16.jpg" alt="Material for the camouflage unit" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Material for the camouflage unit</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+And here I am conscripted, and inside of a week singled out as material
+for the Camouflage unit, with a nice place waiting for me to stay until
+said unit needs me. They are doing it up in really businesslike fashion
+and no doubting it.
+</p>
+<p>
+But in the shuffle I’ve lost my dog. He’s
+only been with me a few days and he’s done
+nothing but get me into trouble all the time,
+yet I miss the little beggar. He wasn’t about
+when I gathered up my belongings this morning,
+and I haven’t had time to look him up all
+day. Perhaps, before taps I’ll wander down
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_41'></a>41</span>
+to the other barracks and see if I can find
+him.
+</p>
+<h2>Friday:</h2>
+<p>
+Real work began in earnest here this morning,
+for the officers in command of the various
+companies of the Headquarters Divisions, or
+Depot Battalions, or whatever it is these particular
+departments are called, are determined
+to rush our drill instructions as fast as possible,
+because there is no telling when any one
+or any number of us will be needed somewhere
+else in the U. S. A. or in France, all of which
+sounds promising for a quick change. I’m
+willing, and I sure hope it’s France.
+</p>
+<p>
+Our day is just filled full of hay-footing and
+straw-footing and squads righting and all that
+sort of thing. I am learning things gradually
+by dint of much cussing on the part of our
+Sergeant, who is also late of the Regular, and
+who certainly has as choice a vocabulary as
+our former drillmaster.
+</p>
+<p>
+We must have a very capable Mess Sergeant
+in this barracks, for the meals here are mighty
+good; better than those we received in the other
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_42'></a>42</span>
+barracks. We actually had ice cream and tea
+this noon, a thing unheard of in most of the
+barracks.
+</p>
+<p>
+And our cook is a wonder. He’s an old
+cockney sea-dog, who looks like a regular buccaneer,
+and he has a parrot, too, whom he calls
+Jock. Jock spends most
+of his time sitting on the
+edge of the coal bin
+shrieking “Lazy Pig.”
+But neither Jock nor
+his master has a sense
+of humour; the cook
+gets mad when he finds
+a man trying to ring in
+a third helping and
+when he gets mad, Jock
+screams: “Lazy pig,
+lazy pig,” and dances
+up and down in a
+frenzy.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i017' id='i017'></a>
+<img src="images/illus17.jpg" alt="Our cook looked like a regular buccaneer." title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Our cook looked like a regular buccaneer.</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+I went back to the old barracks last night, to
+find the place almost filled with new men, all
+worried looking and pale, and much disturbed
+over that first night horror, the
+“needle.” I didn’t relieve their mental
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_43'></a>43</span>
+anguish a particle, which was most unchristian-like.
+</p>
+<p>
+Several of the men remaining from the
+former company told me that most of the original
+company had been split up between the
+“Suicide Club” which is the machine gun companies,
+the transportation division and the
+infantry. As for “Local Board No. 163” no
+one had seen him about. Possibly he has become
+disgusted with high-toned individuals who
+object to fleas, and has gone off and joined the
+infantry. Well I wish him luck.
+</p>
+<p>
+I really believe I’m taking a very deep interest
+in this soldiering after all. I didn’t
+think I would at first, but now I find I’m watching
+the colour of my hat cord with interest. I
+want to see it lose its newness and get faded-out
+looking, like a regular soldier’s hat cord.
+</p>
+<h2>Saturday:</h2>
+<p>
+On the camp calendar, to-day is marked down
+as a half-holiday, which is another one of the
+pleasant little jokes they have down here. It
+is a half-holiday. We quit drilling at twelve
+o’clock. But there is a Sunday ceremony they
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_44'></a>44</span>
+have called inspection and sometimes when the
+Lieutenant wants to leave camp early on Sunday
+he decides to hold inspection on Saturday
+afternoon.
+</p>
+<p>
+About twelve o’clock some one reminds some
+one else that the aforementioned ceremony is
+on the program of weekly events, and thereby
+spoils the whole pleasure for the day. At
+inspection the Lieutenant saunters through the
+barracks, inspects the beds and the stacks of
+underclothing, socks and similar equipment
+piled thereon, and if said underclothing, etc., do
+not show signs of recent acquaintance with
+soap and water, almost anything is likely to
+happen.
+</p>
+<p>
+And, of course, since no one is systematic
+about doing washing, all the dirty clothing and
+extra socks pile up until Saturday, and then on
+the half-holiday the scrubbing tables in the rear
+of the barracks are the most popular playgrounds.
+</p>
+<p>
+The washing process is interesting. Every
+one lines up and dips into the same basin of
+water. Government soap is supplied in quantities,
+so are the scrubbing brushes. One lays
+his jeans and undershirt out nice and smooth
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_45'></a>45</span>
+on a long table, pours a basin of water over
+them, applies the soap as if it were a holy-stone
+until the underclothing is covered with a
+soft yellow scum. And then he spends the rest
+of the afternoon trying to get the soap off.
+The more lather a chap makes the better
+washerman he is, from all appearances.
+</p>
+<p>
+The rear of the barracks on a Saturday afternoon
+looks like a string of tenement house backyards,
+with flapping garments hanging from
+everything, including the electric light wires,
+and men in various degrees of attirement stand
+around waiting for the garments to get dry. Oh,
+you daren’t leave them and go off on some other
+mission while the wind does its duty. You
+simply have to stick and keep a careful eye on
+everything you own, otherwise:—well it works
+on the principle that the man who grabs the
+most is the best-dressed man for the following
+week, and if you are not there to prove ownership
+you are liable to find a pocket handkerchief
+where your undershirt was and the
+handkerchief isn’t always what it was originally
+intended to be.
+</p>
+<p>
+I did manage to get my wash done and gathered
+up in time to see the last ten minutes of
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_46'></a>46</span>
+a Gaelic football game over on the parade
+grounds. But next week I’m going to take the
+advice of the Sergeant who suggests that I
+follow the example of Regular Army men and
+wash each piece as it becomes soiled. I wonder
+if I am systematic enough for that?
+</p>
+<h2>Sunday:</h2>
+<p>
+No I didn’t draw a pass. I’ve been around
+camp the whole bloomin’ day, but there were
+about fifteen thousand lucky fellows who did
+draw passes. I saw them going down in
+groups for every train to the city since four
+o’clock yesterday afternoon. But Fat and I
+seem to be a bit unlucky. Poor Fat, he has
+wanted a pass to get home and see his mother
+ever since he has been here. But a pass
+wouldn’t do him much good. He hasn’t any
+uniform yet. Still waiting for the army tailors
+to get busy. I wouldn’t be surprised if they
+shipped him to France with no more Government
+property than a khaki shirt. We’ve been
+consoling each other most of the day. Fat’s a
+good chap and a mighty likeable fellow.
+</p>
+<p>
+It has been a day of rest, however, for all
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_47'></a>47</span>
+except Giuseppi, the company’s barber. He
+has done a tremendous business; shaved every
+one, from the Captain down.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i018' id='i018'></a>
+<img src="images/illus18.jpg" alt="Giuseppi’s methods are unique and interesting" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Giuseppi’s methods are unique and interesting</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+Giuseppi’s methods are unique and interesting.
+Somewhere he found two planks, which
+he brought into the dormitory, and, by catching
+the lower ends under the iron work of one cot
+and propping them against the side of another,
+he contrived an affair that resembles remotely
+a steamer chair. Line forms to the right.
+Bring your own brush and shaving stick and do
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_48'></a>48</span>
+your own lathering for a quick and effective
+shave.
+</p>
+<p>
+I can’t guess how many he shaved. The line
+stretched the length of the dormitory from
+breakfast to dinner time. The men dabbed
+their brush into a single basin of cold water
+and moistened their faces while standing in
+line. Then as they moved on they soaped and
+lathered their own faces and rubbed it in thoroughly.
+And by the time they reached the
+plank their bristles needed only a final application
+of lather and Giuseppi got busy with
+the razor.
+</p>
+<p>
+He is a wonder. All he did this morning
+was strop and shave, strop and shave, and
+at ten cents a head—no I mean face—(twenty
+cents a head, only no hair cut on Sunday) I
+guess he made a fair week’s wages. As each
+victim left the planks, said victim wiped the
+remaining lather from his face, ears and nose
+and applied his own talcum powder.
+</p>
+<p>
+Perhaps Giuseppi’s business was increased
+by his announcement: “No shava for tree
+days now. To-morrow I getta da needle
+for twice times. No can use my arm vara
+moch.”
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_49'></a>49</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+Which reminds me that I am scheduled for
+my second inoculation to-morrow.
+</p>
+<p>
+I have been discovering some of the unknown
+who are in our midst. Unearthed a
+popular song writer (whose income before he
+adopted the dollar-a-day job for Uncle Sam
+was reputed to be $10,000 a year). I didn’t
+unearth him really. He bobbed up this morning,
+when several of the fellows were playing
+mouth organs, and now, behold, he’s organizing
+a glee club. Then there is a linguist, who is
+fresh from the biggest financial institution in
+the world where he handled all their French
+and Spanish translation work. He has started
+a class in French which is in session for an hour
+every evening. We are all <em>Parlez vous</em>-ing
+with more or less (mostly more) inaccuracies.
+But what we lack in accent and correct pronunciation
+we make up for in genuine Parisian
+gestures. Oh, we’re there all right.
+</p>
+<p>
+Another of our enterprising members is a
+well-known landscape gardener, who, in co-operation
+with one of our several architects, has
+organized a campaign for a “barracks beautiful,”
+all of which doesn’t mean very much to
+most of us, but gives them a good opportunity
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_50'></a>50</span>
+to dispose of their spare time. Our afternoons
+have been spent in pulling stumps in the vicinity
+of the barracks and grading the street
+and dooryard until now no one would ever recognize
+it for the same place. But the landscape
+gardener has carried the work a bit
+further and with the assistance of several of
+us, including myself, gone off into the woods
+and dug up a score or more of pine and cedar
+saplings about five feet high. These have been
+transplanted in the form of a hedge around our
+barracks, on top of a tiny terrace, and they
+certainly soften the outlines of the unpainted
+building and add a touch of that which is lacking
+in the vicinity of most of the structures.
+</p>
+<p>
+He, the landscaper, has placed whitewashed
+stones at conspicuous corners, too, and on either
+side of our tiny porch he has worked out the
+number of the company and the number of the
+division in concrete letters, which the camp
+orderly scrubs industriously every morning to
+keep them white and presentable. The job of
+camp orderly, by the way, is the worst job a
+man can be detailed to here, being one degree
+lower than kitchen police; and since I know
+mighty well the rigours of that, I’m going to
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_51'></a>51</span>
+steer clear of this other form of punishment,
+if it is humanly possible to do so.
+</p>
+<p>
+The Sunday crop of visitors flocked to camp
+as usual to-day and I entertained several who
+did not come to see me especially, but who
+brought along such delightful lunch that I felt
+constrained to show them about and be pleasant
+to them at least while the lunch lasted.
+</p>
+<h2>Monday:</h2>
+<p>
+We were excused from drill this morning for
+the purposes of being shod and getting our
+second inoculation. Getting our shoes was
+the most interesting and least painful of the
+two.
+</p>
+<p>
+After being shot (in the left arm this time)
+we proceeded to the Q. M., where in one portion
+of his domain shoes were being issued, two
+pairs to a man, one pair for work and the other
+for rest and fatigue.
+</p>
+<p>
+Of course, immediately the fitting began the
+men started to protest that they were insulted
+by being given shoes too large for them. But
+that didn’t disturb the shoe man, who merely
+told them to mind their own business and he’d
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_52'></a>52</span>
+take care of their feet, which belonged to the
+Government anyhow.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i019' id='i019'></a>
+<img src="images/illus19.jpg" alt="Each man was loaded with a fifty pound bag of sand." title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Each man was loaded with a fifty pound bag of sand.</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+Standing on a flat surface in stocking feet,
+each man was loaded with a fifty pound bag of
+sand. Then when his feet
+had spread as much as
+they possibly could, measurements
+were taken from
+every angle, just exactly
+as if the shoes were to be
+built especially for the
+foot they were to adorn.
+The collection of figures
+was then gone over, and
+compared with a chart,
+after which two pairs of
+shoes were found corresponding
+with the dimensions covered by
+number so-and-so. I’ve forgotten what my
+number is, but I will confess that while the
+shoes are several sizes larger than I would ever
+think of buying in a shoe store, I have never
+had anything on my feet that gripped my heels
+and instep and ankles so firmly and yet allowed
+me room enough to wiggle my toes around.
+The dress shoes and the trench brogans of
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_53'></a>53</span>
+unfinished leather with half-inch soles filled with
+hobs, and steel plated heels, feel more comfortable
+than any shoes I have ever owned, and I
+gratefully accepted the two pairs issued to me
+and left for my quarters.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i020' id='i020'></a>
+<img src="images/illus20.jpg" alt="“I like t’ geev da Kais a keek in da face wid-a dose shoes”" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>“I like t’ geev da Kais a keek in da face wid-a dose shoes”</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+On my way up the road I passed an Italian
+who seemed so pleased with his new footwear
+that he just couldn’t help exhibiting them to me.
+“Look,” he said, waving his huge foot, shod
+with the trench shoes, about promiscuously,
+“look ad da shoos. I like t’ geev da Kais a
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_54'></a>54</span>
+keek in da face wid-a dose shoos. Bet he no
+smile some more dan.” Then he added, by
+way of showing his qualifications to muss up
+the Kaiser, “I belonga to ah wreckin’ crew
+sometimes when I don’t come down here.”
+</p>
+<h2>Tuesday:</h2>
+<p>
+SWEAR; If you can’t think of
+anything else to say, but do it
+softly—very, very softly, so no
+one else but yourself will hear
+you.
+</p>
+<p>
+Thus reads the sign that hangs over the door
+of the Y. M. C. A. shack, at the end of our camp
+street. That’s what I call social work humanized.
+The Y. M. C. A. here is the most human
+institution in this big, rawly human community.
+It is the thing that puts the soul in soldier
+as one chap expresses it. And because it is
+that way, and because the men feel at home
+and have a real time, and can smoke and put
+their feet on the table, they think the red
+triangle is the best little symbol about the big
+camp. The “’Sociation” is making thousands
+of friends every day among these strapping
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_55'></a>55</span>
+big, two-fisted fellows who really never knew
+what the organization was. It’s bully. We all
+wander over there sometime during every evening,
+if it’s only to listen to a new record on
+the phonograph.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i021' id='i021'></a>
+<img src="images/illus21.jpg" alt="Our $10,000 a year song writer" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Our $10,000 a year song writer</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+The shacks (I don’t know how many there
+are, but there must be at least a dozen of them)
+are the centres of amusement and entertainment
+for us all. And we have some corking
+concerts and other forms of entertainments
+there. I don’t think I’ll ever forget our
+$10,000 a year song writer as he appeared last
+night, for instance, standing on top of the
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_56'></a>56</span>
+piano, his hair all mussed up and his army
+shirt opened at the throat, singing a solo
+through a megaphone. And it was some solo!
+About fifteen hundred huskies in khaki stood
+around and listened to him and joined in on
+the choruses.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then they have lectures: “Ten Years as a
+Lumber Jack,” “Farthest North,” by a certain
+well-known explorer; “My First Year of the
+Big War,” and similar subjects appear on the
+bulletin boards every other night. Nothing of
+the Sunday School variety about that sort of
+thing.
+</p>
+<p>
+And our prize fights!
+</p>
+<p>
+I’m all excited yet over the one I saw to-night.
+It was a whale of a battle; I mean the
+last one was, there being several on the program.
+The fellows fight for passes to go
+home on Sunday and the decision is left up to
+the onlookers. And if we don’t make the
+scrappers work for those passes, then no
+“pugs” ever did work.
+</p>
+<p>
+Most of the boxers are former pugilists who
+have been gathered up in the draft net, and so
+long as they can get a chance to put on the gloves
+they are just as pleased to be here as anywhere
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_57'></a>57</span>
+else from all appearances. But sometimes the
+scrappers aren’t “pugs” at that; just plain citizens
+who possibly have been shadow boxing in
+the secrecy of their bedrooms for the past ten
+years and longing for courage enough to step
+into the ring with a real fighter and discover
+how good (or how bad) they are. They are
+getting the opportunity here all right, and some
+of them are uncovering a likely line of jabs and
+counters. One fair-haired youngster downed
+a mighty pugnacious-looking Italian a few
+nights ago.
+</p>
+<p>
+But to-night’s final was a winner. Three
+scraps had been pulled off with real enthusiasm
+and after the final round, there was a call for
+more material, but no one in the crowd came
+forward to put on the gloves. There were
+calls and jeers and all that sort of thing, then
+suddenly out from the crowd stepped a soggy-looking,
+little red-haired fellow.
+</p>
+<p>
+Yells of “Yah Redney!” “Hi Redney!”
+“Good boy Brick Top!”
+</p>
+<p>
+Redney blushed considerably and held up his
+hand for silence. And when he got it he
+explained.
+</p>
+<p>
+“I ain’t a-going to fight no one but our Mess
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_58'></a>58</span>
+Sergeant. That’s what I’m out here for, and
+I’ll stick here till he comes.”
+</p>
+<p>
+Calls for Mess Sergeant. He wasn’t
+present. A speeding messenger from Red’s
+company hurried out through the night to find
+him. Ten minutes later, said Sergeant, a
+soggy-looking chap himself, was brought in and
+amid yells from the crowd he stepped inside the
+ring. He looked once at Brick Top, then spat
+on his hands and said:
+</p>
+<p>
+“Where’s them gloves?”
+</p>
+<p>
+Gloves were produced and laced on, then
+without the preliminary handshake they
+squared off and went to it. And what a battle!
+They didn’t stop for rounds, or time out, or
+anything. They just ducked and punched and
+whaled away at each other until the blood began
+to spatter all over and still they kept at it.
+I don’t know what the misunderstanding between
+them was and didn’t find out, but they
+sure meant to settle the thing once and for all.
+</p>
+<p>
+And the spectators; they went wild.
+</p>
+<p>
+For ten minutes steadily the fighters milled
+and I never saw a better slugging match. The
+Sergeant had had more experience in boxing,
+that was certain, but what Red lacked in skill
+he made up for in hitting power. Every time
+his glove met the Sergeant’s face it smacked
+as loud as a hand clap.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_59'></a>59</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i022' id='i022'></a>
+<img src="images/illus22.jpg" alt="They didn’t stop for rounds, or time out, or anything." title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>They didn’t stop for rounds, or time out, or anything.</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_60'></a>60</span></div>
+<p>
+Then just when it seemed as if they must be
+tired out, there was a sudden clash and a whirl
+of fists and Redney ducked away and started
+one from the floor. It was an uppercut and it
+found a clean hole between the Sergeant’s two
+arms, and met him flush on the point of the jaw.
+He staggered, tried to fall into a clinch, missed
+the elusive Redney and went down with a
+thump.
+</p>
+<p>
+“1-2-3-4-5-6-” counted the referee.
+</p>
+<p>
+The Sergeant rolled over and tried to get up.
+“Don’t hold me down; lemme at him,” he said
+huskily. But no one was holding him down.
+It was his refractory nerves. They wouldn’t
+obey his will power.
+</p>
+<p>
+“7-8-9-10,” tolled off the fateful numbers.
+Then what a yell went up for Redney, and Red,
+almost all in, himself, evidently had satisfied
+his grudge, for he went over and helped stand
+the groggy Sergeant on his feet.
+</p>
+<p>
+And all agreed it was some battle.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the Y.M. shacks aren’t dedicated to prize
+fights and swearing and concerts entirely.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_61'></a>61</span>
+They are the nearest approach to home or club
+life that most of us come in contact with for
+weeks at a stretch. The big, open hearths
+with their crackling logs are mighty fine places
+to spend a pleasant hour or two. Then there
+are the writing tables, and the reading rooms
+with their books and magazines, and the
+phonographs.
+</p>
+<p>
+The other night I saw a great big fellow, with
+burly fists and a stubbly beard on his chin (it
+must have been the night before his bi-weekly
+shave, which is as often as most of us can
+find time—or the inclination to use a razor)
+snuggled up close to the phonograph and listening
+attentively to the “Swanee River,” which
+he was playing as softly as the instrument
+would permit, and now and then he would blow
+his nose in a big handkerchief and wipe suspicious
+signs of moisture from the corners of
+his eyes. He was having a regular sad drunk
+and enjoying every moment of it. I’ll bet he
+thought he was the most homesick mortal in
+camp.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then there are the telephone booths. Every
+night there is a line of at least fifty men waiting
+patiently for a chance in the booth. At a dollar
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_62'></a>62</span>
+a call they ring up the folks in the city and have
+five minutes’ chat with them, just by way of
+warding off an attack of homesickness. I’ve
+used the booth five dollars’ worth to date.
+</p>
+<p>
+These army breeches I’m wearing, I noticed
+to-night, are very comfortable. I like the deep,
+straight pockets in them. I think I’ll have my
+civilian suit made with those kind of pockets
+hereafter. But I haven’t gotten over the habit
+of pulling them up each time I sit down so that
+they won’t get baggy at the knees.
+</p>
+<h2>Wednesday:</h2>
+<p>
+Found my dog!
+</p>
+<p>
+I was over in another section of the cantonment
+this morning, for a few moments between
+drill and mess call, and there was “Local Board
+No. 163” as big as life, trotting along beside a
+chap I knew. It was Billy Allen. The dog
+recognized me and so did Billy and we stopped
+a while and compared notes.
+</p>
+<p>
+Billy had the worst hard luck story in respect
+to the Draft of any man I know. He’s an
+old National Guardsman, having enlisted soon
+after we left school together. Spent eight
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_63'></a>63</span>
+years in the infantry, and went to the Border.
+He left the service after he got back and a
+little later when a call came for men for the
+Officers’ Reserve Corps he applied and was
+accepted, for the second camp. Meanwhile he
+had registered as a man of draft age. Then
+came his call for Officers’ Training Camp,
+where he was making out famously; so well in
+fact that he was recommended for the aero-plane
+service.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the recommendation was as far as he
+got. The drawing had meanwhile been made
+in Washington, he was well up in the list and
+one fine day he received a notice to appear for
+examination. Of course he passed and was
+accepted. That yanked him out of the Officers’
+Reserve and now he’s down here, a private in
+the “Suicide Club,” with Buck Winters, an
+old classmate of both of us, his commanding
+officer.
+</p>
+<p>
+I told him about “Local Board No. 163”
+whom he had dubbed “Mut” because he looked
+it. First we were going to match for the dog,
+but we decided, after a moment’s reflection, to
+let him choose his master. Billy said good-bye
+and walked one way and I walked the other and
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_64'></a>64</span>
+the dog, after a moment’s hesitation, went with
+Billy. And so I lost my dog a second time.
+I guess he didn’t like my cold water treatment
+for fleas.
+</p>
+<p>
+An interesting thing happened here to-day
+that just shows how vast this huge cantonment
+is. The cot next to Fat and two below me has
+been vacant ever since we have been here. To-night
+a chap came in from the barracks next
+door, bag and baggage, and took possession of
+it. Fat made his acquaintance right off, and
+the newcomer told him that he had been transferred
+to this company about the time we
+were—a week or so ago—and since no one
+told him where to go or where to bunk he
+went to the barracks next door and took a
+cot.
+</p>
+<p>
+But he really belonged in here and was a
+member of our squad, which for some mysterious
+reason had always remained a seven-man
+squad, with the eighth man assigned to it but
+never heard from. Every roll call he had been
+marked absent, and he had been put down as a
+deserter and an alarm sent out for him through
+the country. At the present moment the New
+York police are searching diligently for him.
+</p>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_65'></a>65</span></div>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i023' id='i023'></a>
+<img src="images/illus23.jpg" alt="I guess he didn’t like my cold water treatment for fleas" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>I guess he didn’t like my cold water treatment for fleas</span>
+</div>
+<div><span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_66'></a>66</span></div>
+<p>
+And all the time he has been within a biscuit
+toss of his proper place.
+</p>
+<p>
+Over in the other company he was an outcast,
+and they didn’t know what to do with him.
+They were on the point of sending him back to
+the city as an interloper when somehow the
+mistake was discovered and he was summoned
+to report over here. The interesting part of it
+is, that he is an expert accountant, and his specialty
+is searching out mistakes that other
+people make in the way of misplaced figures
+and things.
+</p>
+<p>
+So far as the police were concerned, he said,
+he didn’t care much, for the last place they
+would ever look for him was down here.
+Speaking of deserters, I noticed three sets of
+finger-prints on our bulletin board which means
+that three men have taken French leave and
+they have prices on their heads, already.
+</p>
+<h2>Thursday:</h2>
+<p>
+This has been a moist and soggy day. I
+don’t know that I have ever seen so much rain
+before in one storm as I have to-day. Before
+daylight it began; a perfect downpour, so violent that
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_67'></a>67</span>
+for reveille we lined up in the mess
+hall. None of us ventured out to wash up, but
+those of us who missed a cold sprinkle the most
+had merely to poke our heads out of the
+windows for a moment and then reach for a
+towel. Some wetness.
+</p>
+<p>
+The camp is a veritable sea of mud, and
+those who go outdoors at all do so to the imminent
+peril of becoming mired and never
+returning. From the mess-hall windows at
+breakfast we could watch the big heavy motor
+truck of the transportation train, skidding and
+sloshing about in the road, down which flooded
+a perfect torrent of muddy rain water. Several
+of them became hopelessly stuck in the
+sticky mud, and their drivers abandoned them
+and raced for cover in the Y. M. C. A. shack.
+Officers and men everywhere have given up all
+idea of outdoor work and the camp streets look
+forlorn and deserted. They stretch away down
+the hill to fade into the misty blur of the rain
+itself, and on either hand stand the long, unpainted
+barracks buildings, with dripping eaves
+and rain blowing in sheets from their tinned
+and tar-papered roofs. Outside, it is a dismal,
+deserted-looking cantonment, with scarcely a
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_68'></a>68</span>
+sign of life, save now and then a venturesome
+canine mascot scuttling from one sheltered spot
+to another.
+</p>
+<p>
+Drilling, of course, is utterly impossible and
+the nearest approach we have had to anything
+resembling military training to-day is a lecture
+on sanitation in the mess hall by the First
+Lieutenant.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the rain has not dampened our desires
+for amusement and as a result the interior of
+the sleeping quarters presents, at the present
+time, a picture that only a Remington could do
+justice to. Atmosphere sticks out all over the
+place. Army overcoats, tunics, variegated
+comforters, blankets, mess kits, sweaters and
+flannel shirts are hanging from every peg,
+and men are sprawled on their cots, in
+various attitude, some trying hard to sleep,
+some writing, one man thoughtfully locating
+the notes of a new tune on a mouth organ,
+while another over in the corner—an Italian—is
+the centre of an enthusiastic group, while he
+plays doleful things on an old accordion he has
+smuggled into camp. The air is blue with
+tobacco smoke.
+</p>
+<p>
+A number of us are writing, including myself,
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_69'></a>69</span>
+but the chief centres of interest are the two big
+poker games and the big crap game down at
+the end of the room.
+</p>
+<p>
+They are all playing with that oppressive
+quietness that portends big stakes. I was
+startled a while ago upon walking over to the
+nearest group to discover eighty dollars, in
+ones, fives, and tens on the top of the army
+cot that served as a table in a single jack pot,
+and they were still betting. Our two Regular
+Army Sergeants are members of one group and
+Fat is sitting in at another. From the length
+of time he has stayed and the smile on his face,
+I can only guess that luck is with him for once.
+</p>
+<p>
+But it has failed a lot of others. Now and
+then a man leaves one game or the other, looking
+sort of hopeless. There is always some one
+to take his place, however.
+</p>
+<p>
+One of these fellows, gone broke, hit upon a
+happy idea which caused no end of interest
+for an hour or two this afternoon. After
+he had gone broke he left the game and
+sat thoughtfully on the edge of his cot for
+a while. Then he dug down into his duffel
+bag under his cot and brought forth a razor.
+Speedily he made up some raffle tickets on
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_70'></a>70</span>
+slips of note paper and presently, with the
+razor in one hand and his campaign hat in the
+other, he started through the room selling
+chances on the razor at a dime a chance. The
+raffle was held over in our corner, and one lucky
+chap got the razor, easily worth two fifty, for a
+single dime and the erstwhile owner, with five
+dollars worth of change in his pockets, returned
+to the game.
+</p>
+<p>
+That started the raffle bug, and presently a
+wrist watch was put up, then another razor
+of the safety variety, a fountain pen, an
+extra hand knitted sweater which some
+one had luckily acquired, several boxes of
+crackers which every one took a chance on at a
+cent a chance and a variety of other things.
+But the crackers were the most popular and
+that helped one ingenious and venturesome
+chap to evolve a money-making scheme.
+</p>
+<p>
+In the height of the rainstorm, he was seen
+to don his slicker, and hurry out into the storm.
+He splashed all the way over to the Post
+Exchange (about half a mile) to return a half-hour
+later with four pies for which he had paid
+forty cents each and three dozen boxes of
+crackers all in good condition. The crackers
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_71'></a>71</span>
+went for double their value and the pies he
+successfully split up into twelve fair-sized
+portions which sold for ten cents each. That
+trip in the rain netted him nearly seven dollars
+he told me, and that seven dollars later on,
+invested in the crap game, trebled itself; so,
+all things considered, he has had a more or
+less successful day.
+</p>
+<h2>Friday:</h2>
+<p>
+It is fast getting home to me now that in
+spite of the heterogeneous conglomeration, of
+races and creeds and languages, the National
+Army is going to be the real thing as a fighting
+force after all. Every one is keen for the thing
+now that the first violent attacks of homesickness
+have worn off and they are going at their
+work of becoming soldiers with a will, except,
+of course, for a few: the conscientious objectors;
+and their life is no merry one. They
+are mighty unpopular, as numerous black eyes
+attest. Every one takes the slightest opportunity
+to emphasize their displeasure at the
+stand these men have taken. And some of
+them are going around here under a cloud.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_72'></a>72</span>
+For instance, the one in the Machine Gun outfit
+who drills in pumps and summer suit but who
+has the pleasure of knowing that after his soldiering
+is all over with, he has three years to
+spend in Atlanta or some other Federal jail for
+little things he has done and views he has
+expressed.
+</p>
+<p>
+We have one of the breed in our company, a
+Jew; and he’s the most unpopular man in the
+outfit, even among those of his own race. All
+of this variety, (the “objectors” I mean), who
+have come to my notice, are sorry specimens
+of manhood for the most part and I can’t
+blame an able-bodied chap for despising them.
+</p>
+<p>
+The foreign element is taking hold like real
+Americans. It is interesting to get their slant
+on the whole affair. Many of them didn’t
+want to come. They had their own ideas of
+army life, suggested, doubtless, by tales they
+have heard of service in the European armies
+of former days. But when they were called
+they came; and behold, when they arrived and
+lived through the first days, they were surprised
+to find that they still were treated like
+human beings, had certain indisputable rights,
+were fed well and cared for properly and
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_73'></a>73</span>
+worked under officers who took a genuine interest
+in their welfare. This was something
+most unexpected. Right off they decided that
+they were going to get all they could out of this
+new life and give in return faithful and honest
+service.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i024' id='i024'></a>
+<img src="images/illus24.jpg" alt="“Make-a me strong, make-a me beeg, an’ best-a make-a me good American”" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>“Make-a me strong, make-a me beeg, an’<br/>best-a make-a me good American”</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+“It’s fine, I like it,” assured a little Italian
+friend of mine in the infantry. “I like it because
+it help make me spick good English,
+make-a me strong, make-a me beeg an’ best-a
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_74'></a>74</span>
+what is, make-a me good American, jus like-a
+de boss Lieuten’.”
+</p>
+<p>
+And in that last sentence, I believe, lies the
+charm of it all to most of the foreigners. They
+have learned that America and things American
+are fine and clean and good and their ambition
+now is to become a real American
+“jus like-a de boss Lieuten’.” And when they
+get to be real Americans, they are going to be
+proud of the fact and they are going to fight
+to prove it; that’s certain.
+</p>
+<p>
+The camp is still soggy to-day and we have
+drilled ankle deep in mud. My feet have been
+wet from the time I stepped out of the barracks
+until an hour ago, when I changed my socks and
+put on my dress shoes. But shucks, what appetites
+we brought back with us from the
+parade grounds. I never did care for fish, but
+I’ll be hanged if I didn’t eat three helpings
+of the creamed salmon and spaghetti to-night.
+</p>
+<p>
+A new wrinkle has developed here. We find
+out what the fellows are going to have for
+supper in nearby barracks and if the feed
+promises to be better than what we are to
+have several of us take our mess tins and go
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_75'></a>75</span>
+over and stand in line there. The Mess Sergeant
+never knows the difference.
+</p>
+<h2>Saturday:</h2>
+<p>
+Sad news this evening. Only twenty-five per
+cent. of each company is to be allowed to go
+home to-morrow, because of the disorder and
+general trouble at the railroad terminal last
+Sunday. And the twenty-five per cent. is to
+be drawn out of a hat. No chance for Fat or
+me, that’s certain. We’re mighty unlucky
+when it comes to passes and we are laying odds
+now that neither of us will get permission to
+go to the city. Anyhow, Fat is still in the same
+predicament. If he does get a pass he won’t
+be able to leave the camp.
+</p>
+<p>
+At the present writing we are all waiting
+for the mess call. And immediately after mess
+the Sergeant will do the drawing of the names
+for the passes. If I am not among the lucky
+ones I’m going to try and—there goes the mess
+call!
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_76'></a>76</span>
+</p>
+<h2>Sunday:</h2>
+<p>
+I am ready to die with a smile on my lips
+and a great happiness in my heart, for I’ve
+spent one night between clean sheets, on a
+really soft bed. I’ve eaten with a silver knife
+and fork from real dishes and—whispered
+softly—in the privacy of my own home I had
+a glass of beer!
+</p>
+<p>
+No, I wasn’t lucky (neither was Fat) but I
+think I put something over on Uncle Sam.
+</p>
+<p>
+The passes for the city were drawn for as
+per schedule and since I was down at the
+bottom of the list I was not included in the first
+twenty-five per cent. The passes issued read
+for New York City, and the men holding them
+were privileged to leave by certain trains, being
+marched down to the station under the watchful
+eye of the Second Lieutenant.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then, after these men were all away, came
+the opportunity for the men who lived near the
+camp and the men who wanted to visit nearby
+towns to apply for leave. This was my opportunity.
+I applied for thirty-six hours’ leave to
+visit the town of R——, twenty miles distant,
+and secured it.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_77'></a>77</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+Back in the barracks an interesting scene was
+taking place, scores of tickets of leave had been
+handed out to the men, to take the night and
+following day off, but to get out of camp they
+must be able to pass inspection with perfect and
+well-fitting equipment, and since all of us had
+not our full outfit, we had to hustle around and
+borrow articles of clothing that would fit and
+look satisfactory. I, for instance, have a full
+winter uniform except for overcoat (which I
+have not received) and tunic, the one I am
+wearing being a summer coat of cotton and
+hardly matching the wool trousers I possess.
+So I had to join the crowd who were bartering,
+exchanging and renting uniforms. And since
+the first men to leave had done the same thing to
+a certain extent, there was not much desirable
+clothing left in the barracks. Overcoats were
+going at a dollar a day and breeches and jackets
+for fifty cents each. After a diligent search I
+did find a chap who had a winter tunic and summer
+trousers and, wonder of wonders, his jacket
+fit me perfectly. We made an exchange and I
+borrowed an overcoat at one dollar for the day,
+from a chap who was not leaving camp, and
+sallied forth.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_78'></a>78</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+Tramping down Twenty-third Avenue (the
+streets are all named here and our barracks
+is on Fourteenth Street and Third Avenue),
+whom should I behold but friend Billy, bound
+in the same direction. He had had the same
+inspiration as I and he, too, had a pass for
+R——. We wandered on together, but upon
+reaching the railroad station, our hopes of getting
+to our destination were dashed. There
+were no more trains for R—— until the
+morning!
+</p>
+<p>
+We wept. But our tears didn’t blind us to
+the fact that there were occasional machines
+passing along the highway. So we walked out
+and stood there in the moonlight and looked as
+lonesome and forlorn as possible.
+</p>
+<p>
+And the first machine to come along was a
+beautiful big Pierce Arrow limousine, with an
+old dowager, a pleasant and generous old soul,
+its single occupant, save of course the chauffeur.
+We went to R—— in style; and, moreover,
+we went there in a hurry, for with khaki
+in the machine the chauffeur assumed that he
+had the right of way and full permission to
+wreck the speed laws.
+</p>
+<p>
+At R—— we looked up time tables and discovered that
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_79'></a>79</span>
+we could get a train into the city
+at ten-thirty, which was not so bad. Then, because
+our passes really limited us to R——, we
+concluded that it was only fair to the Government
+to at least eat a meal in that town and
+since we were both hungry in spite of our recent
+mess, we searched for a restaurant.
+</p>
+<p>
+We found one; a French restaurant, which
+looked peculiarly deserted. The door was
+locked, for some strange reason, yet there were
+several men in aprons inside apparently hard
+at work. We rattled on the door and in a moment
+the frowning proprietor came forward.
+But the frown changed to a smile when he saw
+us. It was the khaki. He unbolted the door
+and, with a ceremonious bow, welcomed us in,
+then closed the door and bolted it.
+</p>
+<p>
+And then he explained that this was a new
+restaurant not yet opened for patronage. He
+expected to open up in a day or maybe two.
+But, of course, he could not turn away two
+hungry soldiers, never. <em>Merci non!</em> He had
+nothing to serve us with, but what were our
+desires? Express them and he would send out
+for the provisions, cook them and serve them.
+Steak! Indeed, yes. In twenty minutes we
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_80'></a>80</span>
+would have a wonderful steak, French fried
+potatoes, salad, coffee and ice cream. Jean
+would attend to it.
+</p>
+<p>
+And Jean did. He rustled up the steak and
+the rest and we alone occupied the restaurant,
+and soon were eating the most delicious piece
+of beef we believed we had ever put our teeth
+through. The bill! Nothing; nothing at all—what?—well
+if we insist, one dollar each.
+Thank you! And now here is a pen and some
+ink. You will please autograph each bill and
+behold, when you return from glorious France,
+covered with glorious glory, you should come
+in and see these two bills—the first money
+taken in at the restaurant—framed and hanging
+there over the desk. And so, I suppose,
+the future generation of visitors to R—— will
+be able to view these immortal monuments to
+our—I don’t know what, unless it be our
+khaki uniforms—hanging there in the French
+restaurant possibly surrounded by wreaths as
+each anniversary of day before yesterday rolls
+’round.
+</p>
+<p>
+We got the ten-thirty train for the city, and
+we almost got into trouble too; or at least I
+did, for as we hurried into the smoker whom
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_81'></a>81</span>
+should I see sitting buried in a magazine but
+the First Lieutenant of our Company. Had
+he made the trip the same way we did? I
+don’t know and, of course, I didn’t ask. We
+just walked through the car very swiftly and
+he never looked up.
+</p>
+<p>
+It was fifteen minutes of midnight when I
+arrived home, let myself in with my latch key
+which I have been carrying as a silent reminder
+of my former terrifically wild (?) career; routed
+out the folks, and sat swathed in bath-robe
+and dressing-gown until 3 o’clock, just talking.
+It was bully. And then I tumbled into my own
+bed and slept and slept and slept. I woke up
+at reveille all right—(it was just daylight)—grinned,
+rolled over and slept and slept and
+slept some more.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then I had a real bath in a real tub with real
+hot water, and a lot of real things to eat and
+real cigars to smoke and real friends to talk
+with until five o’clock in the afternoon, when I
+crawled into my regimentals once more, and
+went out to meet Billy by appointment.
+</p>
+<p>
+Going back via R—— route (which was
+necessary) curtailed our leave which really
+continues until to-morrow morning at reveille,
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_82'></a>82</span>
+but then we were very happy; so happy that
+when we arrived in R—— we chartered a taxi-cab
+for the twenty mile drive out here and now
+I’m nearly frozen through from the cold wind
+that blew in at us. And I’m tired, too, but I’m
+happy and ready to turn in ten minutes before
+taps.
+</p>
+<h2>Monday:</h2>
+<p>
+I’ll need no “Melody in Snore Minor” to lull
+me to sleep to-night, for I am thoroughly
+weary. It was intimated a day or so ago that
+our training would be hurried a little so
+that we would be ready for a quick shift
+at any time. But hurried doesn’t exactly
+describe it. It looks like an early fall drive
+to me.
+</p>
+<p>
+We began at the beginning, this morning, and
+had our squad drills all over again, and somehow
+in the juggling about of men to make up
+our company formation I managed to get last
+place in line, and pivot man in the front rank
+of the last squad.
+</p>
+<p>
+Before to-day I’ve been in the rear rank and
+had a screen of front-rank men to cover up any
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_83'></a>83</span>
+blunders I might make, but being in the first file
+gave me stage fright. And, of course, with the
+stage fright I bungled;—forgot which was left
+and which was right. We began by facing, and
+first chance I managed to turn left when the
+command was right. That blunder made me
+more self-conscious. If I had had to talk I’m
+sure I would have stuttered. As it was I
+stammered with my feet.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then “About Face.”
+</p>
+<p>
+I faced about all right, only I pivoted on a
+stump root that some stupid had forgotten to
+dig out. The result was I lost my balance, and
+made several movements instead of one before
+I came to position.
+</p>
+<p>
+At drills the Sergeants, who do most of the
+drilling, are equipped with sticks about a yard
+long so that they can poke a rear-rank man in
+the back without disturbing the front-rank men,
+and thus call attention to blunders. Being a
+rear-rank man on the about face, I presently
+felt the stick poking into my ribs and the
+command:
+</p>
+<p>
+“You step out here.”
+</p>
+<p>
+I stepped out, and was requested, along with
+much language, to go up in front of the company and
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_84'></a>84</span>
+give a demonstration in the proper
+method of “about facing.”
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i025' id='i025'></a>
+<img src="images/illus25.jpg" alt="A demonstration in the proper method of “about facing”" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>A demonstration in the proper method of “about facing”</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+My self-consciousness fled immediately. I
+was mad. I wanted to talk back, and make a
+few remarks about the Sergeant and the
+stump and things. But I suddenly thought
+of a tour of kitchen police and restrained myself.
+Instead I about faced with such energy
+that the Sergeant knew I was boiling inside,
+and being a decent sort of a chap, he sent me
+back to the ranks after a couple of demonstrations,
+instead of keeping me out there for
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_85'></a>85</span>
+fifteen minutes as I have seen them do to some
+fellows.
+</p>
+<p>
+After that I felt more at ease in the front
+rank. All morning long we ambled across the
+landscape, doing squad and company movements.
+It was just drill, drill, drill, for fifty
+out of every sixty minutes, the ten minutes being
+allowed as rest periods. We reviewed all
+our previous instructions and worked up to the
+point of forming company fronts, with the
+movements of right and left front into line and
+on right into line, and as pivot man, I think I
+did mighty well. Our squad never stepped off
+a pace ahead of time on any of the formations.
+And when we were marching back to the barracks
+at mess time, the Sergeant came up
+beside me, and remarked, by way of apology
+for hauling me out of the ranks earlier in the
+morning, that I was doing good pivot work.
+</p>
+<p>
+Perhaps we didn’t enjoy mess! Three
+helpings of navy beans for me with pineapple
+marmalade, and a piece of salt pork on the
+side, not to mention three cups of coffee and
+three slices of bread. I sure had luck on the
+mess line to-day.
+</p>
+<p>
+This afternoon the First Lieutenant took
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_86'></a>86</span>
+charge of the company, and he had us traipsing
+all over the landscape again, doing the same
+sort of close order manœuvres, and when we
+lined up just before retreat he announced that
+we would have rifles to-morrow morning.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is interesting to see how rumours travel
+and gather force in the barracks. Some one,
+somehow, heard that an artist and a stenographer
+from our company are to sail for France
+in a day or two. Of course, all my friends have
+come to the conclusion that I am the artist. A
+chap told me about it at mess this evening, and
+since then several dozen have looked me up to
+shake hands with me and tell me good-bye, with
+such remarks as: “Hear you have orders to
+sail for France to-morrow; great.” “They
+tell me you got a commission from Washington
+and that you are going across in a day or two,”
+or, “Say, you’re a lucky chap; where’d you get
+the drag down in Washington?”
+</p>
+<p>
+But these queries fail absolutely to thrill
+me. I am quite calm and undisturbed. I deny
+any “drag” whatever, and I know that I am
+not the artist mentioned in the order for transfer,
+if there is any such order, which I doubt.
+This is only about the <em>n</em>th time that same
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_87'></a>87</span>
+rumour has been afloat as a result of which I
+have bade good-bye to my friends about every
+other day only to discover myself still with
+them a week later with the same old rumour
+bobbing up again.
+</p>
+<h2>Tuesday:</h2>
+<p>
+I’m really a soldier. I know the manual
+of arms.
+</p>
+<p>
+This morning, true to the First Lieutenant’s
+prediction, we drilled with rifles and now I am
+quite convinced of the truth of the old saying
+that a gun is dangerous without lock, stock, or
+barrel. Fat turned around suddenly when he
+had his rifle over his shoulder and poked the
+muzzle of it into my mouth; a regular Happy
+Hooligan performance, and now I have a split
+(and considerably puffed) lip and a loose tooth
+to my credit in this horrible war.
+</p>
+<p>
+We were marched over to one of the infantry
+barracks on the edge of the big parade grounds
+and there we found our rifles; I mean ours for
+the day only, because there are hardly enough
+in camp to equip us all yet and we have to
+take turns using them. In the same way
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_88'></a>88</span>
+there is only one field piece to each artillery
+company, but that doesn’t seem to worry the
+artillery men much.
+</p>
+<p>
+They are doing some real drilling over on the
+other side of the camp. I was surprised to
+discover a company at work digging trenches,
+another company practising throwing hand
+grenades, with stones representing the deadly
+Mill’s bombs, still another group constructing
+parapets of sand bags, and working out machine
+gun emplacements, and in the distance
+artillery companies hovering about a sleek
+looking gun, learning the complicated parts
+and where and how the animals are served.
+</p>
+<p>
+Krags, instead of Springfields, are the rifles
+available for drilling purposes here, and for the
+first hour this morning we devoted our time to
+learning the floor plan of the thing. I was
+getting along famously until Fat interrupted
+my investigations with the muzzle of his
+weapon.
+</p>
+<p>
+Soon after that we started drilling. And I
+think it is to our credit that before noon we
+had mastered all the movements and that our
+pieces snapped up to position with real
+vigour.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_89'></a>89</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+“Let me hear them hands slap them pieces,”
+said the Sergeant; then “Ri—sholler—harms!
+One-two-three-four! Pep, that’s it, pep an’
+snap. Slap ’em hard. Ordah—harms! One-two-three!
+<em>Done</em> drop ’em—<em>done</em> slam ’em
+down. Nex’ man slams ’em gits kitchen
+p’lice.”
+</p>
+<p>
+So we drilled until our arms ached, and rifles
+that weighed about eight pounds at the beginning
+of the drill seemed to have increased to
+fifty pounds, and felt as long as telephone
+poles. Perhaps we weren’t glad when our
+First Lieutenant put a stop to the punishment
+and started us in the general direction of the
+mess hall.
+</p>
+<p>
+And we had beef stew for dinner; beef stew
+with rich brown gravy, such as our old biscuit
+shooter alone can make.
+</p>
+<p>
+But after mess we were back at it again.
+Only this time it was bayonet practice, but not
+of the variety pictured in most magazines. We
+haven’t reached the stage of charging trenches
+and swinging bundles of sticks. Such advanced
+work comes later.
+</p>
+<p>
+Bayonets are awkward, ugly things, and I
+could not help being grateful that Fat took it
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_90'></a>90</span>
+into his head to poke me in the mouth with his
+rifle this morning instead of this afternoon. If
+he had waited until after mess he wouldn’t have
+split my lip; he would have cut my head off.
+When I saw him with bayonet fixed I gave him
+a wide radius of action. Indeed I avoided him
+as if he were a plague.
+</p>
+<p>
+In open, or extended, order we lined up on
+the parade grounds in front of one of these
+movable elevated platforms. Our Second Lieutenant
+mounted this, and with a bayonetted rifle
+in hand went through the various lunges,
+thrusts and parries of the bayonet manual,
+meanwhile giving us a lecture, to the effect that
+no matter what the War Department intended
+to do with us, a knowledge of bayonet fighting
+would be essential. He assured us that the
+logical weapon for an American soldier was
+the rifle. One of our birthrights is markmanship
+and another is bayonet fighting. He
+briefly cantered over a century and a half of
+history of the Republic and pointed out how
+we had won fame and honour with bullet and
+bayonet, and he wound up by telling us that
+every American soldier should prepare himself
+so that he would be as dangerous to fool with
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_91'></a>91</span>
+as a stick of dynamite. Picture good-natured
+Fat impersonating a stick of dynamite.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then we went at it. We lunged and thrust
+and parried until perspiration began to stand
+out on our foreheads. From the corner of my
+eye I had a vision of Fat trying to disguise
+himself as a high explosive. Every time he
+lunged, he would scowl viciously and emit a
+loud grunt. I discovered a few moments ago,
+however, that it was a case of over-eating at
+mess time that caused him to grunt and
+frown every time he tried to move very fast;
+not a desire to look ferocious, although I
+guess it passed for that in the eyes of the
+instructor.
+</p>
+<p>
+And now I’m told we are to get this sort of
+training daily for a long period; close order
+formation in the morning, with rifle and bayonet
+drill in the afternoon and later on we will
+do skirmish work, trench work and open order
+work with rifles. Some of the infantry companies
+are already doing that. I was treated
+to the spectacle of two companies scurrying
+across the upper end of the parade grounds like
+so many rabbits. Now and then they would
+fling themselves down on their stomachs and
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_92'></a>92</span>
+begin snapping away merrily with empty rifles
+at an imaginary enemy.
+</p>
+<p>
+We are a tired-looking company to-night.
+Already half the cots are filled with men, some
+of them snoring lustily and it is only a quarter
+to ten.
+</p>
+<h2>Wednesday:</h2>
+<p>
+There are a lot of things calculated to stir
+a chap’s sentimental streak about this camp,
+particularly the nights; moonlight nights like
+to-night for instance. Every hard outline of
+the huge place is softened under the blue-black
+mantle of night, and the disagreeable things are
+lost in the heavy shadows and the moonlight
+floods the open places, and glistens on the rows
+upon rows of tin roofs and tall, gaunt-looking
+tin smoke-stacks. Watch-fires (a sanitary precaution)
+blaze in their deep holes in the rear of
+each barracks building, and the lonesome fire-guard,
+bundled in his overcoat and with rifle
+over his shoulder, stands silhouetted against
+the night sky beside each flaring pit.
+</p>
+<p>
+Out on the main streets of the camp are
+thousands of fellows in khaki, walking aimlessly up
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_93'></a>93</span>
+and down, while in the by-streets
+between the barracks buildings one sees
+shadowy figures and glowing cigarette ends
+moving about in the darkness. Through the
+tiny panes of each barracks window, partly
+obscured by overcoats and sweaters which
+dangle from pegs inside, filters a warm yellow
+light, and as one moves down the row, one
+hears from one building the music of an
+accordion and the rhythmic shuffle of feet
+which tells of a “stag” dance being held in the
+mess hall; while from another comes the soft
+plunk-plunking of a banjo and the occasional
+drone of a mouth organ that seeks after harmony,
+but only succeeds with an effort.
+</p>
+<p>
+Off to the right toward the parade grounds
+some fellows are singing and their songs sound
+mighty good in the moonlight. And from far
+beyond where the thick pine woods stand out
+black against the sky comes faintly the hooting
+of a distant owl.
+</p>
+<p>
+On the main streets that skirt the outer edge
+of the cantonment on three sides, the arc lights
+glisten, like rows of far off diamonds against
+the velvet of a jewel box, and here and there,
+where two twinkle, like low-hung stars, stand
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_94'></a>94</span>
+out the Y.M. shacks where the men are gathering
+for an evening’s recreation.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is wonderful to wander out such nights as
+these. Bundled in a sweater to keep out the
+chill of evening, and with only my pipe for
+company, I often go tramping off through the
+by-streets of the camp. The smoke of the
+hundreds of watch-fires is wafted to me on
+every breeze and in wood smoke there is a
+charm; the charm of camping out. Never in
+my life will I smell the smoke of burning pine
+wood, but that these nights will come trooping
+through my memory, and I’m certain that I will
+be homesick then and want to come back and
+live them all over again.
+</p>
+<p>
+And the things I often see:—the fire-guard
+for instance, who alone out there behind
+the barracks was trying hard to read
+a letter by the light of his flickering watch-fire.
+Was it a letter he had just received
+and could not wait to open, or was it a
+letter that he had read many, many times
+before and was rereading once again? Then
+the lonesome dog who sat out in the company
+street and stared up solemnly at the moon,
+like a lone wolf on the prairie. What instincts
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_95'></a>95</span>
+were being waked within him by the moonlight?
+And the silhouette through the window of the
+chap sitting on his cot patiently plying needle
+and thread and the two fellows who leaned
+against the jacketed field piece in front of
+an artillery barracks and talked in whispers,
+while through the opened door of the buildings
+on either hand came the noise of a rousing
+good time within.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then the tramp up Tower Hill, where
+the headquarters building with its darkened
+windows like sightless eyes stands out from
+the sparse remains of the pine woods, flecked
+here and there with patches of moonlight.
+</p>
+<p>
+Far off across the great camp, and across the
+tops of the pines one can dimly see from the
+top of the hill the ocean with the moonlight
+flashing on its surface, and occasionally comes
+a breath of chilled salt air that stirs a longing,
+vague and fleeting, as the ocean has always
+stirred a longing in the soul of the adventurer.
+From here one can look down upon the great
+camp. Thousands and thousands of roofs
+stand out in the moonlight, and the watch-fires
+twinkle in orderly rows up and down each
+camp street. Far off to the left are the big
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_96'></a>96</span>
+machine shops and forges of the construction
+company, the forge fires glowing red against
+the night, while faintly comes the far-off ring
+of anvils. Those forge fires, like the bakery
+fires, never die.
+</p>
+<p>
+To the eastward is the railroad terminal with
+its panting engines and its medley of noises,
+while nearer at hand but in the same direction
+is the transport headquarters with its ceaselessly
+moving caravan of rumbling, grumbling
+army trucks. All combines to make a picture
+that holds one spell-bound.
+</p>
+<p>
+The days here are pleasant indeed, but the
+nights are almost intoxicating. They cast a
+spell upon me and leave a memory that can
+never fade.
+</p>
+<h2>Monday:</h2>
+<p>
+This place looks like a growing mining town
+somewhere out West, but for real atmosphere,
+the civilian camp, outside the reservation, has
+the cantonment looking really civilized. I went
+out there this evening after mess; for I heard
+that there was a cigar store included in the outfit,
+and the impression I got was a lasting one.
+Everything of the frontier was there save the
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_97'></a>97</span>
+saloons and the gambling halls. Shacks, tents
+(rows upon rows of them), lean-tos and all
+forms of domiciles. And the men who walked
+the streets were of every variety, including
+real lumber jabs in mackinaws and spiked
+boots, who had come down to cut away the
+timber; Italians, Poles, Swedes, Slavs and
+what not, and a real cowgirl, in short skirts and
+high leather boots, with a silk handkerchief
+scarf, sombrero and a big thirty-eight strapped
+to her hip. She, I learned, runs a motor bus
+between the civilian camp and the nearest
+towns.
+</p>
+<p>
+Cook fires twinkled outside of the tents, lights
+showed through the canvas walls reflecting the
+huge, grotesque, shadowy figures of the occupants.
+From one emanated the strains of an
+accordion and from another the babble of voices
+that suggested a quarrel over a card game.
+</p>
+<p>
+I found the cigar store. I found other stores,
+too, just shacks thrown together, but carrying
+a stock of everything in the line of wearing apparel
+and eatables. One displayed the sign of
+“Jack’s Unsurpassable Lunch,” another “The
+Elite,” and another “The Emporium.” There
+were hundreds of squalid booth-like structures
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_98'></a>98</span>
+besides, where a host of curious things were for
+sale to the hordes of big-fisted, deep-chested
+men who were brought there to build the cantonment.
+But they tell me that the civilian
+camp is fast breaking up now, for the cantonment
+is almost completed. The remount
+stables for the artillery, the refrigerating plant
+and the huge bakery are all that remain to
+be built and the labourers are leaving in big
+groups.
+</p>
+<p>
+The temporary bakery (I passed it to-night
+on my way back to camp) is represented by a
+double line of tents, before each of which is a
+big field baking oven, its coal fire glowing from
+lower doors like huge, red eyes and its gaunt
+smoke-stack reaching upward to terminate in
+a cloud of black smoke which ascends higher
+and higher in long, graceful spirals until it is
+lost in the darkness of the night.
+</p>
+<p>
+Before these ovens work the bakers, in khaki,
+of course, but each swathed in a flowing white
+apron. With sleeves rolled up and shirts
+opened at the throat, they wield their long
+bakers’ paddles, and as they pass to and fro
+in the dull red firelight, they look elfish and
+grotesque; exactly like a lot of gnome bakers
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_99'></a>99</span>
+off in the “nowheres” baking bread for some
+ferocious ogre who bids them work incessantly.
+</p>
+<p>
+And these loaves they bake are indeed loaves
+for ogres; huge affairs two feet long and as
+big ’round their rich brown girth as pumpkins.
+In “sheets” of a dozen each they are brought
+from the fire and placed steaming hot on a
+nearby table where an expert breaks them
+apart and tests the tenderness of their fibre
+and searches for signs of doughiness. These
+bakers are all of the Regular Army now, but
+not long since czars of dingy cellar bakeries
+located anywhere from Boston to San Francisco.
+But the ogre has called them together
+and here like gnomes they work, eight hours
+each in three shifts and the oven fires are kept
+burning always.
+</p>
+<p>
+Still we drill, drill, drill. This morning was
+spent in manœuvring and tramping over the
+wet and soggy countryside in company formation,
+and this afternoon, by way of variety, we
+were given a few hours fatigue duty in the line
+of uprooting more stumps and gnarled tentacles,
+that seem to have rooted themselves in
+China. But our hands are hard and leathery
+now and our muscles no longer creak and pain
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_100'></a>100</span>
+under the stress. I’ve added four pounds to
+my former weight and I have never felt more
+fit in my life.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i026' id='i026'></a>
+<img src="images/illus26.jpg" alt="They seemed to have rooted themselves in China" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>They seemed to have rooted themselves in China</span>
+</div>
+<h2>Tuesday:</h2>
+<p>
+The cost of high living here is enormous.
+The stoop-shouldered, shrewd-eyed, flinty-hearted
+Yankee clerks behind the broad
+counters of the “Post Exchange” disdain anything
+less than a quarter. Dimes and nickels
+are chicken-feed, and pennies—impossible. If
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_101'></a>101</span>
+a chap buys one apple at five cents or one pear
+or one banana (always green and a long way
+from being ripe) he has to hide himself in the
+crowd to escape the baleful eye of these grasping
+sharks. Five cent crackers sell two boxes
+for a quarter, penny candies are five cents each,
+cigars and cigarettes are considerably above
+normal in price and considerably below in
+quality, and ice cream sells for ten cents a
+gram.
+</p>
+<p>
+But none of us has grown up. We are all
+like big boys and we spend with no thought of
+to-morrow. Mess over, we all hie out to the
+two main roads that lead to the “Post Exchange,”
+jingling coins in our trouser pockets.
+The “Exchange” itself is a long, low unpainted
+building like all other buildings here with tiny
+back country windows, half-obscured by garments
+hanging within which leave only a few
+dirty squares for the dull yellow light to show
+through.
+</p>
+<p>
+The doors are broad and through them
+streams a never ending line of troopers, some
+coming, some going. Inside, the place resembles
+nothing more than a huge up-country
+general store with shelves upon shelves stacked
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_102'></a>102</span>
+high with cracker boxes, shoe boxes, hardware
+and goodness only knows what not, while from
+the rafters hang heavy coats, sweaters, lanterns,
+huge stalks of green bananas, hams,
+bacon, boots and a lot of useless things that
+only gullible soldiers who feel a yearning to
+spend their money really purchase. But this
+spending of money somehow seems to bring us
+closer to civilization for the moment and we
+join the churning mass of men within, whose
+hobnailed shoes produce a great pounding and
+scraping sound and whose voices are raised in
+a constant babble of conversation which only
+the sharp ting, ting of the cash register bells
+can punctuate.
+</p>
+<p>
+We mill around with the crowd, and soon are
+pushed against a counter. Something attracts
+our eye. We feel a desire to possess it. We
+buy it, and start milling about the room again
+until presently we are near the door. Then
+we step out into the night again and join one
+of the groups of loiterers or sit about on boxes
+and piles of lumber, where we devour our purchase,
+if it happens to be in the line of crackers
+(which is usually the case), or admire it, if it
+happens to be a pocket flash lamp, a fountain
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_103'></a>103</span>
+pen or something else that we really never have
+had any use for.
+</p>
+<p>
+The small-town idea prevails even in the city
+of thirty thousand lonesome men. The “Post
+Exchange” and the “Post Office” are the two
+centres of interest. First we wander to one,
+and then we wander to the other, then with time
+on our hands we join the stream of men going
+up one side of the road “just walkin’” and
+when we reach the point where most of the
+crowd turns back, we turn back, too, and continue
+our “walkin’,” with no particular place
+to go, until the streets begin to get deserted and
+it is time for the town to close up. Then we
+disappear, too, and for an hour occupy ourselves
+in the barracks until taps are sounded
+and lights are out, when we go to bed; the place
+I’m headed for now, so soon as I put the top
+on my fountain pen.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_104'></a>104</span>
+</p>
+<h2>Wednesday:</h2>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i027' id='i027'></a>
+<img src="images/illus27.jpg" alt="Sick Call" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>Sick Call</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+That’s the call that brings out all the
+shirkers. They line up in the morning and
+present all sorts of ailments from sore throat
+to heart disease.
+</p>
+<p>
+The line is especially long on mornings when
+they know we are in for two hours of “settin’-ups”
+or when some especially hard detail such
+as camp orderly or kitchen police has been
+handed out. A day in the hospital will relieve
+one of all these duties. This morning I was on
+the long line. But I hasten to explain that <em>I</em>
+was sick (that’s what they all say, of course,)
+with chills and a scrapy feeling in my throat;
+and since we are forbidden to take any medicine
+of our own, I shame-facedly line up with the
+rest of them. There were about twenty all told
+and the doctor made short work of us.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_105'></a>105</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+“What’s the matter with you?” very cross.
+</p>
+<p>
+“I-I-I-here—it hurts,” said one, pointing
+to his back and looking quite scared. The M.
+D. poked his finger into the spot designated.
+</p>
+<p>
+“Man you’re not sick,” said the doctor in a
+very startling manner, “you’re almost dead,
+only you won’t lie down. You’ve dislocated a
+couple of vertibraes, ruptured a half-dozen ligaments
+and like as not you have a chronic case of
+pneumonia. The only thing that I can recommend
+for you is two hours of strenuous exercise.
+You may pull through and you may not.”
+Then, with a malicious grin, he turned to the
+next man and the first invalid shuffled off,
+mumbling something about horse doctors without
+any horse sense.
+</p>
+<p>
+Two out of twenty of us got by. The rest
+went to work. I was one of the two. I had
+a slight temperature and an inflamed throat.
+Nothing serious, but report to the hospital. I
+did. And the best thing about the hospital was
+the fact that there were two sheets on the bed
+and I had an abbreviated flannel nightshirt to
+sleep in. Three big pills, the size of bullets and
+just as deadly, and then I turned in, went to
+sleep and slept right through mess time.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_106'></a>106</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+Four o’clock I was feeling very much better
+and ravenously hungry and at five o’clock I was
+discharged as cured. I don’t know what I was
+cured of, but I’m feeling much spryer just now
+after three helpings of beef stew and apple
+marmalade and I’m ready to turn in and sleep
+some more.
+</p>
+<h2>Thursday:</h2>
+<p>
+If there is one thing that I want to remember
+more than anything else about this Conscript
+Camp it is the spectacle I witnessed and took
+part in this evening.
+</p>
+<p>
+Fancy if you can Tower Hill with its big
+headquarters building snuggled in among the
+scattered and gaunt pines, the tall, ungainly
+water-tank propped up on all too spindly-looking
+stilts. On top of this a single figure thrown
+in bold relief by the golden yellow light of a big
+watch-fire, beating time with his baton, and
+below him, clothing the slopes of the hill five
+thousand men, his chorus, thundering forth
+across the starlit night “Columbia the Gem of
+the Ocean.” That chorus was wonderful; that
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_107'></a>107</span>
+crowd was wonderful; everything about it was
+wonderful.
+</p>
+<p>
+We were all singing; thousands of fellows in
+khaki, some snuggled in their big army overcoats,
+some puffed out like pouter pigeons with
+the sweaters they had piled on under their
+tunics against the cold chill of night. Intermingled
+were the lumber jacks and labourers
+from the civilian camp, most of them in gay
+mackinaws and caps; with now and then an
+officer immaculately clad in clean cut uniform,
+or a Y. M. C. A. man in grey-green suit with
+red circle and triangle gleaming in the firelight.
+And how well they could sing; I have
+never heard a more stirring chorus and as we
+raised our voices loud and clear shivery thrills
+raced up and down our spines, and we were
+stirred to the highest pitch of patriotic fervor.
+Indeed, there were some among us who could
+find no better way of expressing the emotion
+that swelled within save by tears. They cried.
+I was one of them.
+</p>
+<p>
+“America” and “Dixie” and “Maryland”
+followed and every one produced its own thrill
+and its own heartache. Never was there anything
+more stirring, Never was there anything
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_108'></a>108</span>
+finer. We sang till our voices were husky and
+the great chorus surged loud and clear across
+the night, until it must have echoed against the
+crags of the Rhine and caused the Hun to
+shudder.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then the breaking up of the big meeting,
+when groups detached themselves and wandered
+out of the fitful flicker of the dying firelight
+into the misty blue blackness of the night,
+still singing. Out through the streets of the
+camp we tramped, stepping to the cadence of
+our own songs. We were all happy, very, very
+happy and draft or no draft, down in our
+hearts we all knew that we were in the very
+place we were meant to be, and we were doing
+the very things that we should do, and that
+when the time came we would do other and
+greater things with as much eagerness and enthusiasm
+as we had sung up there on Tower
+Hill to-night.
+</p>
+<p>
+The whole camp was singing even after the
+concert, but the character of the songs changed.
+“Over There” swelled forth everywhere and
+“The Yankees Are Coming” was chanted in
+every street. Out toward our own barracks
+our little group swung, passing the railroad
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_109'></a>109</span>
+siding where, partly shrouded in the canvas
+jackets, new artillery pieces were waiting to be
+moved in the morning. A cheer for these and
+a cheer for everything and anything that suggested
+patriotism, and on we tramped, brimming
+over with enthusiasm.
+</p>
+<p>
+And now I’m back to the barracks again, but
+the mysteries of the night and the spell of the
+whole wonderful occasion is still over me and
+I know I shall lie awake a long, long time and
+think and dream of all that waits for me in
+the not very distant future. And the promises
+I made myself up there on Tower Hill will all
+be fulfilled, that’s certain.
+</p>
+<h2>Friday:</h2>
+<p>
+Momentous news. We of the headquarters
+company, or rather eighty-seven of us, start
+Monday on the first leg of that longed-for journey
+to France. We go to a Southern training
+camp where new units are being formed into
+which each of us will fit. And along with this
+news came the announcement that none of us
+will be given a pass to go home for a last
+good-bye. This has stirred the men more than
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_110'></a>110</span>
+the news of the transfer South. Several impromptu
+indignation meetings were held this
+morning and this afternoon, just after mess, a
+real demonstration took place in the mess hall
+and most of the eighty-seven of us were loud in
+our assertions that we would go home anyway,
+even though we were arrested for desertion
+afterward.
+</p>
+<p>
+This little incident served to impress upon
+me more than anything else the freedom that
+is accorded the men of this new American
+Army, for behold, before the meeting broke up
+a Lieutenant came in and addressed us on the
+penalties for desertion, the difficulty of dealing
+with headstrong soldiers and similar subjects,
+and then when we all felt and looked like
+slackers he announced that although orders had
+gone forth that no passes were to be granted,
+our commanding officer, knowing our feeling in
+the matter, was at that time trying very hard
+to arrange to secure permission for the men to
+go home over Saturday night and Sunday. As
+I left the mess hall I wondered vaguely how
+such a mass meeting would have been treated
+in the German Army, for instance, and I
+thanked my lucky stars that I was an American.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_111'></a>111</span>
+</p>
+<p>
+But there are a thousand and one things remaining
+to be accomplished to-day. I have
+been hurrying from one place to another since
+reveille and now at taps all that I should do is
+not done yet. But to-morrow is another day.
+</p>
+<p>
+First of all we were rushed off to receive our
+third and fourth inoculations together. Then
+came the announcement that we would be relieved
+of all our winter clothing and given a
+complete summer outfit instead, for it appears
+there is no need for woollens in this Southland
+camp to which we are going.
+</p>
+<p>
+And between times, there were a score of
+personal things I wanted to do, not the least
+of which was to join the line of waiting men
+before the telephone booths in the Y. M. C. A.
+shacks to tell them at home the news of our
+going. In all this, poor Fat seems to be sadly
+left out, for he is not among the fellows who
+are to leave. He stands helplessly by and
+watches the hurry and bustle going on about
+him, and sometimes I think there is a sad, wistful
+sort of a look in his big, good-natured face,
+for I know he doesn’t like the idea of staying
+here when the snow begins to fall and winds
+whistle disconsolately around the corners of the
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_112'></a>112</span>
+barracks building. I am glad that <em>I</em> will not
+have to spend the winter here and I’m sorry,
+too, that Fat is not to be with me.
+</p>
+<h2>Saturday:</h2>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i028' id='i028'></a>
+<img src="images/illus28.jpg" alt="A soldier-boy in his native haunts" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>A soldier-boy in his native haunts</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+To-day, for the first time since I have been
+here, I had visitors. Those at home, eager to
+get a glimpse of their
+soldier-boy in his native
+haunts, came down to see
+things as they are. I’m
+quite certain that the general
+arrangement of the
+barracks, with its cluttered
+appearance suggested by
+many pairs of shoes standing
+around and many hats
+and coats and old sweaters
+hanging about, did not
+accord with mother’s ideas
+of good housekeeping.
+And she assured me that
+many of the old rose, pink
+and baby blue comforters would not have suffered
+from a washing, all of which I had never
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_113'></a>113</span>
+noticed before, until she drew my attention to it.
+She intimated, too, that my dish towel and my
+hand towel would never testify as to my respectable
+up-bringing, and she felt that I should make
+a practice of taking off those abominably heavy
+trench shoes in the evening and putting on a
+pair of slippers which she would send down to
+me. She thought that a bath-robe might come
+in handy for lounging in the evening and perhaps
+after we got comfortably settled in our
+Southern quarters, she might send one of the
+big, roomy library chairs down to me, for she
+did not approve of one’s sitting on one’s bed
+the way most of us did. She deplored the total
+lack of chairs about the barracks and she was
+quite sure that taking an ice cold shower out
+in that horrible big tin building would certainly
+result in innumerable cases of influenza, if
+nothing more serious. She’s a dear old mother
+and I don’t know that I have ever appreciated
+her so much as I have since I’ve been down
+here.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then with my visitors caring for themselves
+for a while, and mother chumming up with the
+always affable Fat, whom she took quite a fancy
+to, I hurried about my work of being re-outfitted
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_114'></a>114</span>
+with summer uniforms. Fortunately they allowed
+me to retain my overcoat (which I received
+but a few days ago) until we are ready
+to entrain.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then came the passes. The officer was successful
+and we who are to go South are given
+a release from duty until to-morrow night at
+retreat. Other passes were distributed, too,
+and Fat fortunate for once, yet unfortunate,
+got one to go home until Monday morning.
+But poor Fat! Still the military tailors lag and
+now that he has the pass that he has been trying
+to get for this last month, he cannot use it,
+for he is not properly uniformed to leave the
+cantonment, having still just his flannel shirt.
+He tried frantically to borrow parts of a uniform
+to fit him and while he could find a
+pair of breeches that he could get into, a
+jacket was lacking, so in disgust, and with a
+most unhappy smile, he gave it up and went
+over to the Y.M. telephone booth to ask his
+mother to come down and visit him over
+Sunday.
+</p>
+<p>
+And to-night there are no taps for me, for I
+am home once more and writing this at my own
+desk. We all came home together and had a
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_115'></a>115</span>
+bully trip and now, after the best dinner I have
+eaten in many a day, I shall see a real show at
+a real theatre, and sit up as late as I choose
+and when I go to bed I will be between clean
+sheets again and there will be no officers’
+whistles to wake me in the morning.
+</p>
+<h2>Sunday:</h2>
+<p>
+Back again, but back to a sad and very unhappy
+barracks. Fat, poor, poor Fat, who felt
+downcast because he was not going South, has
+gone on a far longer journey. It is the first
+tragedy that has come into our life here in our
+barracks and with the thoughts of the breaking
+up of the big family on the morrow, and the
+homesickness, that most of us feel because of
+our all too brief trips home, has cast a gloom
+over us all.
+</p>
+<p>
+Unfortunate Fat, done out of using his pass
+by the slowness of the army tailors, telephoned
+home yesterday to have his mother come out to
+see him. At train time this morning he was at
+the terminal awaiting her arrival. But in the
+shifting of the cars back and forth in the yard
+an accident happened and Fat, in the way of
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_116'></a>116</span>
+it, was one of its victims. Both his legs were
+crushed and he was hurried away to the
+hospital.
+</p>
+<p>
+Meanwhile, his grey-haired old mother arrived
+and stood about the terminal hour after
+hour wondering why he did not come for her,
+and it was not until late this afternoon that
+one of the boys in our company thought to go
+down and try and find her; which, fortunately,
+was not too late to bid her son good-bye.
+</p>
+<p>
+And now we are on the eve of our departure.
+As I came through the terminal an hour ago the
+troop train, a long line of nondescript coaches,
+was being made up. As each car was made
+ready it was shunted into line by the ever-grumbling
+engine and to-morrow at daybreak
+all will be ready for us. Then we will go and
+some of us will be sorry, and some of us will
+be glad. As for myself, all that I can say is
+“Adieu, camp,” and if the place I am bound
+for, wherever it may be, holds the charms that
+I’ve found here, I’ll be happy.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_117'></a>117</span>
+</p>
+<h2>Monday:</h2>
+<p>
+The mere suggestion of troop movements has
+a thrill to it, and we have had a lot of thrills
+to-day.
+</p>
+<div class='figcenter' style='padding-top: 1em; padding-bottom: 1em'>
+<a name='i029' id='i029'></a>
+<img src="images/illus29.jpg" alt="I was alone in line" title=""/><br />
+<span class='caption'>I was alone in line</span>
+</div>
+<p>
+After a long period of restless waiting, and
+good-byes to every one and everything about
+the old barracks, came
+the command to fall in.
+Then in summer uniforms,
+and each with a
+big blue barracks bag
+crowded with personal
+belongings, extra uniform,
+shoes, blanket
+and what not, on our
+shoulders, we lined up,
+shouted last farewells
+and stepped off, down
+the barracks street and
+out toward the railroad
+station. There was no whistling nor singing
+for we were all very solemn, and I was lonesome,
+for I was alone in line, the only member
+of our entire squad to go.
+</p>
+<p>
+We came upon other columns of fellows,
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_118'></a>118</span>
+coming from other companies, bound with us
+for this Southern camp. On we marched to the
+terminal. Here confusion reigned for a while,
+for hundreds of men in khaki were scattered
+everywhere, all bending under blue duffel bags,
+and wondering what was to happen next.
+</p>
+<p>
+But soon we were entrained, and then with
+locomotive whistles hooting, and heads bobbing
+from every car window, we said farewell to The
+Camp. And with the leave-taking our spirits
+seemed to rise, for there was singing and
+whistling and horse play once more as the big
+cantonment faded from view behind its fringe
+of pine woods.
+</p>
+<p>
+Our first impression was that we would
+travel all the way to Georgia in the cars we
+had been assigned to, but, fortunately, this was
+not true, for after a long and tedious trip we
+detrained again at a ferry terminal in Brooklyn.
+Here, too, was confusion. It was late in
+the afternoon, and we were hungry. Every
+candy stand, and handy store was patronized
+until the officers interfered. Then came the
+big, old fashioned side-wheeled ferries, and we
+were hustled aboard.
+</p>
+<p>
+Soon the old craft swung out into the river
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_119'></a>119</span>
+and with churning paddles we headed down
+stream.
+</p>
+<p>
+It was just sunset. Far down the bay, beyond
+Governor’s Island and Liberty, a great,
+fiery red disc was setting in a haze of smoke
+and mist from the city, while to our right and
+left on the river banks, lights began to twinkle,
+and overhead strings of diamonds draped each
+gracefully arching bridge. Past the Navy
+Yard we swung, with cheers from the crews
+of three destroyers in the river. Tugs and
+steamers and passing sound night boats greeted
+us with whistles, and we lined the rails and
+cheered back.
+</p>
+<p>
+Soon we churned under the last of the
+bridges and began to make our tortoise-like
+way around the Battery. Lights were glimmering
+through the violet haze that shrouded the
+mass of sky-touching buildings, and in the foreground
+were hurrying throngs of men and
+women wending their way through Battery
+Park toward the ferries.
+</p>
+<p>
+Up the North River, the skyline of the huge
+cities changed and grew more impressive, as
+one building after another came out of the
+mass and stood alone against the blue-black
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_120'></a>120</span>
+Eastern night sky. Ferries criss-crossing in
+the darkness, leaving sparkling trails of light
+that danced on the water, crowded close to us
+at times, and the mass of men and women
+huddled on the windswept decks, cheered us on
+our way. Thus did we say our last good-bye
+to the big city—and we said it solemnly and
+thoughtfully, too, for many of us know that we
+are going on the long, long journey and will
+never see that skyline again.
+</p>
+<p>
+The crowds in the terminal, as we hurried
+from ferry to the railroad yard, cheered us, too,
+and men rushed out to shake hands with us and
+crowded cigarettes and cigars into our pockets
+as we marched on.
+</p>
+<p>
+We had been told that the Red Cross would
+feed us. It did, to the extent of a single sandwich
+and a cup of coffee, hastily snatched as
+we wended our way through the railroad yard
+to the train.
+</p>
+<p>
+Long tourist sleepers are our lot. They
+stood on a siding, dimly lighted with a single
+candle at either end of the car when we climbed
+into them and were assigned to our seats. We
+are settled now, and rolling swiftly across
+Jersey. Lights have been turned on, and the
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_121'></a>121</span>
+interior of the car looks very strange with the
+big blue duffel bags swinging from every hook
+and swaying as the train rounds each curve.
+But we are all very quiet, and many of us are
+thinking. We are all homesick that is certain,
+and hungry, too, and wondering about the
+future.
+</p>
+<h2>Tuesday:</h2>
+<p>
+We are rolling through Virginia into the
+sunset.
+</p>
+<p>
+For twenty hours we have been crowded into
+these cars, and we are cramped and tired, but
+feeling happier with all. Two to a berth, we
+tried to sleep last night. But sleep was impossible.
+I was up most of the night, standing
+at the upper end of the car looking out the
+window, while my new-found bunkie tried hard
+to get in a few winks. He wasn’t successful.
+</p>
+<p>
+At midnight we ran through a little station
+called Brandy, and there in a pounding rainstorm,
+under the light of a smoky, yellow oil
+lamp, stood a solitary soldierly-looking figure,
+a boy, bare-footed and with head uncovered and
+his rain-soaked cap held over his heart in a
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_122'></a>122</span>
+salute. He alone had been watching for the
+troop train.
+</p>
+<p>
+Sometime after daylight, at Charlottesville,
+our train stopped for water. All signs of the
+rain had cleared, hundreds of boys, black and
+white, and men and women swarmed to the
+station to greet us. Our canteens were passed
+out of the windows for water, and hot coffee
+and thick sandwiches of home-made bread and
+jelly and delicious ham were given to us by a
+committee of very old women who had been up
+since long before daylight awaiting our arrival.
+Rations were served to us after we pulled out
+of the station, consisting of bread and hard
+crackers, and a can of tomatoes and a can of
+beans for every six men.
+</p>
+<p>
+By way of diversion we began to play poker
+for the beans, and a pair of jacks left me breakfastless,
+except for the coffee and sandwich I
+was fortunate enough to get at Charlottesville.
+And that is all I have had since seven o’clock
+and it is now half-past four.
+</p>
+<p>
+At one station along the line, where we laid
+over for a few moments, several fellows, acting
+as Sergeants, were sent out to buy food for our
+company. But the train pulled out without
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_123'></a>123</span>
+them. Goodness knows where they are now,
+but the saddest part of it is that they didn’t
+bring back the eats.
+</p>
+<h2>Wednesday:</h2>
+<p>
+We are travelling through a land of gold and
+red and green, with huge dabs of white marking
+the cotton fields. And we are hungry no longer.
+</p>
+<p>
+At Cornellia the train stopped for half an
+hour, and the fellows, all but famished, made a
+wild rush for the door, and sweeping aside such
+obstructions as angry Sergeants took the town
+by storm. About seven hundred soldiers descended
+upon it, and bought everything in the
+eating line that they could possibly find, even
+to whole cheeses, huge stalks of bananas, and
+cases of honey. We ate, and we flooded the
+town with money. Never has Cornellia seen
+such a busy half-hour in its history, and never
+did the stores do such a tremendous business.
+</p>
+<p>
+We held up the troop train while we satisfied
+our appetites. But what of it! We are happy
+now, with tight belts and plenty of cigarettes
+to smoke, so why worry!
+</p>
+<p>
+Never in my life have I seen so many negroes.
+<span class='pagenum pncolor'><a id='page_124'></a>124</span>
+They swarm about the train at every stop
+we make, chalk their initials on the cars (as
+every one else has done) sing songs, cheer and
+just bubble over with enthusiasm. Last night,
+while our train was on a siding, an old fellow
+somehow got inside the car and did a wild buck
+and wing dance in the aisle for pennies that
+were tossed from every bunk. And this morning
+another old fellow, with a bag of cotton on
+his back, came a little too close to the windows
+of the troop train. Eager hands seized the bag
+and pulled it from his shoulders, and presently
+the cotton was being distributed among the men
+as souvenirs.
+</p>
+<p>
+And now we are only twenty miles from
+Atlanta, and the fellows are beginning to pack
+up their belongings. Some are trying hard to
+shave in a crowded wash-room, for the long
+train ride has left us all appearing a little the
+worse for wear and we want to enter our new
+home as presentable as possible.
+</p>
+<p>
+I wonder what this new home will be like?
+Camp X is the cantonment and I am told that
+it is bigger than the place we left, but if it is
+half as pleasant we will be satisfied.
+</p>
+<div class='center'>
+<p>THE END</p>
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Conscript 2989, by Irving Crump
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+</body>
+</html>
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@@ -0,0 +1,2760 @@
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Conscript 2989, by Irving Crump
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Conscript 2989
+ Experiences of a Drafted Man
+
+Author: Irving Crump
+
+Illustrator: H. B. Martin
+
+Release Date: July 24, 2011 [EBook #36832]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONSCRIPT 2989 ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Roger Frank, Katherine Ward, and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: I summoned "Local Board 163" in Court Martial
+proceedings]
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+ CONSCRIPT 2989
+
+ EXPERIENCES OF A DRAFTED MAN
+
+ ILLUSTRATED BY
+ H. B. MARTIN
+
+ NEW YORK
+ DODD, MEAD AND COMPANY
+ 1918
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+ COPYRIGHT, 1918, BY
+ DODD, MEAD AND COMPANY, INC.
+
+ Service Flag Design on Cover Patented November 6, 1917
+
+ Reproduced by Permission of Annin & Co., Flag Makers, New York
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+ TO
+ MY MOTHER AND FATHER
+
+ and every other Mother and Father, who spend hours wondering about
+ the welfare of their son, this book is dedicated. And with it comes
+ the assurance that life in the big cantonment contains a full
+ measure of real happiness, and that all hardships are mitigated by a
+ sense of humor which develops even in the worst of pessimists. We
+ are contented, for to compensate for the absence of you and all that
+ you mean, comes the knowledge that we are doing everything that
+ brave men and women, the world over, would have us do at times like
+ these. We are doing a man's work and by the token of the service
+ flag in your window you should know that the days of patched
+ trousers, darned stocking, of toy fire engines, play soldiers, and
+ noisy drums, were not spent in vain.
+
+- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
+
+
+
+
+CONSCRIPT 2989
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+Once when I was an enthusiastic freshman (it seems ages ago) I joined a
+Latin society that had for its inspiration the phrase, _forsan haec olim
+meminisse juvabit_.
+
+All I can remember about the society is the motto, and there is nothing
+particularly pleasant about the recollection, either. But somehow
+to-night that fool phrase comes back to me and makes a pessimist of me
+right off. I wonder how pleasant these things are going to be and
+whether I will want to remember them hereafter. Perhaps I won't have
+much choice. I'll probably remember them whether I want to or not.
+Already my first eight hours of active service as Conscript 2989 have
+some sharp edges sticking out which I am likely to remember, though many
+of them are far from pleasant.
+
+I am now truly a member of the army of the great unwashed and
+unwashable--no, I take that back. They are washable. I saw a grizzly old
+Sergeant herding four of them out to the washroom this evening. Each of
+them carried a formidable square of yellow soap and a most unhappy
+expression. But the Sergeant looked pleased with his detail.
+
+Never in my wildest flights of fancy can I picture some of these men as
+soldiers. Slavs, Poles, Italians, Greeks, a sprinkling of Chinese and
+Japs--Jews with expressionless faces, and what not, are all about me. I'm
+in a barracks with 270 of them, and so far I've found a half dozen men
+who could speak English without an accent. Is it possible to make
+soldiers of these fellows? Well, if muscle and bone (principally bone)
+is what is wanted for material, they have got it here with a vengeance.
+But, then, from the looks of things they have been doing wonders and
+they may make creditable soldiers of them at that. Goodness knows, they
+may even make a soldier out of me, which would be a miracle. Here's
+hoping.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+I only need to glance back over the page I wrote last night to see how I
+felt. This conscripting must have gotten under my skin a little deeper
+than I thought. I'll admit I was homesick, and I guess it made me a
+little testy. I think I really should tear that page out and begin over.
+It isn't exactly fair, and, besides, it doesn't fulfil the function of a
+diary, anyway, which, I take it, is a record of events and things--not a
+criticism of everybody in general and an opportunity to give vent to
+disagreeable feelings.
+
+[Illustration: Never in my wildest flights of fancy can I picture some
+of these men as soldiers]
+
+From a "close-up" view yesterday may have seemed like a trying day, but
+to-night it looks a lot different and a lot more interesting. I must
+confess that all the "good-byes," and the bands, and the weeping mothers
+and sweethearts, and the handshakes, and the pompous old turtles (who
+dodged the draft in the Civil War or bought substitutes) who slapped you
+on the back and told you how they wished they were young again, along
+with the arrival of the "Kaiser Kanners," who unquestionably were
+"kanners" of another variety, and the parade and the Home Guard and the
+dozen and one "Comfort Kits" that every one handed you, and the mystery
+of what was to come, and the scared look on every one's face, including
+my own, and the vacant feeling in the pit of one's stomach, superinduced
+by sandwiches and coffee, fudge, oranges and chocolates in lieu of a
+real meal, did get on my nerves.
+
+[Illustration: Every one of them had a fiendish grin on his face]
+
+But, hang it, when I look back we got a great farewell, at that. And the
+local Board did things up mighty well. I find myself possessed of a
+razor, razor strop, wrist watch, two pocket knives, unbreakable mirror,
+drinking cup and a lot of other things that I never expected to own or
+need. I haven't the remotest idea where many of them came from.
+
+Then there was that long, almost never ending train ride, which seemed
+to be taking me on an unbearable distance from the place I really felt I
+belonged.
+
+And the arrival; all I saw when I tumbled off the train were thousands
+of unpainted buildings and millions of fellows in khaki, and every one
+of them had a fiendish grin on his face as he shouted: "Oh, you rookey.
+Wait, just wait; you'll get yours! When they bring on the needle. Oh,
+the needle."
+
+I had a vague idea of what the "needle" might be, but it wasn't pleasant
+to hear about it from every one I met. But I guess there were a lot of
+fellows who were not quite certain what this threatening "needle" was.
+Foolishly two of them asked one of the Sergeants who met us at the train
+and what they heard in reply to their queries made them paler than they
+were before, if that were possible. Thereafter, for the rest of the
+afternoon and evening, the "needle" was the subject of earnest
+conversation among us all, and the doubts and misgivings about that
+instrument of torture, coupled with a thoroughly good case of
+homesickness on the part of every one of us helped to make a pleasant
+(?) evening. And that most of us worried until far into the night is
+certain. I know I did, and the Italian on my left cried himself to
+sleep, and didn't try to hide his unhappiness either. Oh, it was a
+delightful evening, all things considered.
+
+Forty-seven of us, all from my own district, came down together, and
+while we remained in one group there was a measure of consolation to be
+had for us all. But our hopes that we would stay together at camp were
+dashed immediately we got off the train. In fact we were so thoroughly
+split up that I managed to get into a squad composed entirely of
+foreigners, and I'm still with them. But the prospects of a change are
+excellent.
+
+Quite as docile as sheep, and just as ignorant, we were marched down one
+camp street after another. My friends of foreign extraction, with due
+regard for anything that looked like a uniform, saluted every one that
+passed, and they were tolerably busy until we were halted outside of our
+present abode, a big two-story, unpainted barracks building.
+
+Here mess kits were served to each of us, and though we did not know the
+combination that unlocked the mysterious looking things, we were glad to
+get them, because they added so much to the dozen and one things we were
+already carrying. Then, completely smothering us, came two tremendous
+horse blankets and a comforter. Those comforters were everything their
+name implies. Not only did they afford warmth, but amusement as well.
+They ranged in shades from baby blue and pink to cerise and lavender,
+and some one with a sense of humour must have distributed them. The
+stout, pudgy, black-haired Italian to my left reposes under the
+voluminous folds of a beautiful pink creation, and across the room sits
+a huge Irishman, with hands as big as hams and shoulders of a giant,
+with a baby blue comforter wrapped about him. Mine is a bewitching old
+rose. But, believe me, it's there with the quality if it isn't much on
+looks. I found that out last night.
+
+Then, after the Sergeant showed us where we bunked and where we could
+expect to find something to eat about supper time, every one left us
+severely alone, which was mostly what we wanted, because we all had a
+lot on our mind between homesickness and that blessed "needle." But
+there was some work to do, such as stuffing mattresses with hay,
+sweeping out the barracks and similar occupations until bed time.
+
+[Illustration: A baby blue comforter wrapped about him.]
+
+Some one, who had evidently heard some weird tales about the punishment
+meted out to those who overslept at camp, brought an alarm clock along
+with him, and the blooming thing went off at 4 A.M. Of course we got up,
+switched the lights on over head, and proceeded to get dressed with that
+resigned now-what-are-you-going-to-do-with-us air.
+
+But dressing was interrupted by a string of the most beautiful cusses I
+ever heard, coming downstairs just in advance of a mighty mad looking
+Sergeant:
+
+"Who in ---- tarnation bow-wows has got that ---- alarm clock? Pitch it out
+the ---- window, and git back to bed."
+
+It went and we went. But that's as far as we could go. Thoughts of the
+"needle" and other forms of torture which we were to face in a few short
+hours kept most of us awake until a quarter after five, when every
+officer in camp began to blow letter-carrier whistles. Then we all got
+up and were introduced to some physical exercises guaranteed to stretch
+every muscle in our makeup. I took a cold shower bath after mine, and
+was the object of interest of the entire barracks. Great stuff (I mean
+the shower).
+
+Most of us might have been tolerably happy after that, if it hadn't been
+for the fact that every man in uniform made some evil suggestion about
+the "needle." And when they saw us all, white and corpsey looking and
+more or less unsteady on our legs, line up in front of the barracks and
+march off under our Second Lieutenant, the groans and sorry faces they
+feigned were enough to make one's blood run cold. And then we got the
+"needle."
+
+[Illustration: An alarm clock went off at 4 A.M.]
+
+I, for one, was disappointed, and so were most of the rest of us. But
+there were a few who didn't give themselves a chance to be disappointed.
+They promptly fainted: not because of the injection but because of the
+state of their nerves which they all admitted afterward. There were a
+few things about the examination calculated to scare a man to death such
+as the question: "In case you are shot and killed to whom do you wish
+six months' pay to be sent?" Many of us stammered a bit before
+answering.
+
+[Illustration: Jabbed at the iodine mark and pulled the trigger]
+
+After that we stripped, lined up and started on our way. Then measured,
+marked and finger-printed, we arrived before a physician who stamped a
+quarter section under the left shoulder blade with a sponge covered with
+iodine, while another one scratched the skin on our upper arm to mark
+the acreage to be covered by a vaccination. We moved on to two more
+physicians, and while one dug a hunk out of our arm and inserted vaccine
+in place of the skin removed, the other man, with a villainously long
+hypodermic, jabbed at the iodine mark and pulled the trigger. And now,
+by George, if any one else around here tries to kid me into worrying
+about anything at all, I'm going to talk back proper. They sure had me
+scared stiff and I'll admit it. Why, hang it, I would rather have had
+typhoid than face that "needle" before I really knew what it amounted
+to. But here I am, with germs variously estimated at from 15,000 to
+250,000 circulating around inside of me, due to said "needle," and aside
+from a little wooziness in the head, and a sore shoulder, I'm quite
+contented and ready to turn in. Good-night.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+The serum injections of yesterday produced some queer, and in one case
+unfortunate, results. Last night after taps were sounded and lights were
+out, I lay awake a long time in spite of the fact I was very tired.
+
+Couldn't understand it, and my arm and back were as sore as could be.
+Hour after hour wore on, and I couldn't get to sleep. Some did, however,
+and I had a regular frog's chorus of snores to keep me company. I became
+a veritable specialist in snores and wheezes and grunts. Every time I
+heard a new variety I formed mental pictures of the men who probably
+made them.
+
+Then the chorus was interrupted by some one not far from me who called
+out mournfully: "Oh, my back, my back! The needle!" Then in sharper
+tones: "Count off. 1-2-3-4." I wondered what horrors his overwrought
+nerves were causing him to dream of.
+
+But when I did get to sleep I slept soundly, certainly, for they told me
+this morning that one chap had become seriously ill, and had been
+carried from the barracks to an ambulance and whisked away to the
+hospital sometime during the small hours of the morning. It seems that
+he had an excess of germs circulating around inside of him, due to the
+fact that he did not know enough to move on after the doctor had given
+him the first injection, and the physician, looking only for the nearest
+iodine spot, shot him twice in the same place.
+
+However, I am reasonably certain I'll sleep to-night all right, for I've
+been pulling stumps all day, or rather during the time I wasn't learning
+to recognize my right foot from my left, and a few other things that
+every man thinks he knows until some one takes the pains to expose his
+ignorance. Oh, I have the qualities of a really capable soldier in me--if
+some one can find them. As an infantryman I'm a much better stump
+puller. I proved that this afternoon. I have a beautiful double handful
+of blisters, not to mention a ruined suit of clothes and hopeless shoes,
+to my credit in this war of exterminating the Hun. I hope we get
+uniforms soon, because if we don't, I'll be going about clad in my old
+rose comforter and some summer underclothes.
+
+Stump pulling is rough on clothes, but it certainly is an appetite
+builder. I've discovered already that it is good policy to be among the
+first on line with a mess kit, then if you can bolt your beef a-la-mode
+fast enough, and get outside and wash up your kit, you stand a good
+chance of joining the last of the line, thereby getting a second
+helping. Indeed, several fellows have it down to such a science already,
+that they get three helpings before the cook begins to say things.
+
+The barracks is beginning to look picturesque. The atmosphere of a
+western mining camp, arranged for stage purposes, prevails. The
+Italians, swarthy-faced, heavy-featured fellows, for the most part,
+gather in little groups, smoke villainous pipes and play cards
+incessantly, whenever they are allowed much time in the barracks. Our
+Semitic friends linger in the vicinity of the door that leads to the
+mess hall and kitchen, especially about meal time. And their mess kits
+are always handy. Nicknames have already become common, and we have
+among us such worthies as Fat, Doc, Peck's Bad Boy, Toney, Binkie,
+Shortie, Shrimp, Simp and Pop. The last name has been applied to me,
+inspired, no doubt, by the suggestion of baldness aloft.
+
+[Illustration: Italians gather in little groups]
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+Didn't sleep much last night, for some reason. Think I was too tired.
+This is the third night I've lost time. Beginning to feel it now. But no
+one else seemed to sleep well either, or at least they didn't go to
+sleep right off. Lights out at ten and all supposed to be "tucked in."
+Then came various remarks from the darkness; choice, unprintable remarks
+about the Kaiser, the Government, the Sergeant, certain Corporals, who
+doubtless heard all their well-wishers had to say, but could not
+identify the speakers. Indeed, it struck me that the fellows had hit
+upon a choice way of telling certain non-coms what they thought of them,
+without the possibility of getting in bad. Then arguments started in the
+darkness, and the vocal combatants were urged on by catcalls and
+encouraging yells from various sections of the unlighted room, and
+presently shoes started flying.
+
+About that time the Top Sergeant upstairs woke up, and decided to
+investigate. Silence fell in the big room when the stairs, creaking
+under his weight, gave warning that the crusty old veteran of fifteen
+years' service with the Regulars was on his way down.
+
+[Illustration: The Top Sergeant made the round of the cots]
+
+The door opened and a pocket flashlight began to travel from cot to cot.
+But strangely enough every one was slumbering contentedly, and some even
+snoring. The Top Sergeant made the round of the cots, reached the door
+and "doused his glim."
+
+Then with a most impressive introduction of profanity he remarked that
+"The next ----, ----, son-of-a-bandmaster, who started anything would spend
+the rest of the night out on the porch in his underclothes," whereupon
+some wag from the darkness replied: "Put t' Kaiser out there, he started
+it." While others sweetly remarked: "Good-night Ser_geant_." "Pleasant
+dreams, dear." "Come kiss me good-night." and "Don't forget to tuck us
+all in."
+
+But things eventually subsided and I dozed off, only to be awakened
+later by some one kissing me on the cheek. It was startling to say the
+least, and I sat up. I thought perhaps the Sergeant had come back to say
+good-night. Then it happened again, only this time on my hand, and I
+heard an eager little whine, and a sniff-sniff-sniffing that told me
+plainly a dog was beside my cot.
+
+I chirped encouragingly and up he came. Then he dived between the
+blankets and burrowing deep worked his way down to the foot of my cot.
+Evidently he had slept in army cots before. All my efforts to dislodge
+him were futile and I knew that unless I got up and unmade my bed he
+would not come out. So I left him, and he in gratitude kept my feet
+warm.
+
+This morning he appeared at reveille, waking me up with his frantic
+efforts to dig himself to light again and kissing me good-morning, by
+way of showing his appreciation. He was just a plain yellow dog, with a
+lop ear and a habit of wagging all over when he could not get enough
+expression in his stump of a tail. Attached to a strap that he wore in
+place of a collar was a tag on which was scrawled: "Presented to Local
+Board No. 163--Hold the fort for we are coming." I concluded that if they
+held onto the fort, when they arrived, as well as they held onto their
+dog it wasn't worth while having them come at all.
+
+"Local Board No. 163" stood guard on the foot of my bed, or rather, sat
+guard, until I got dressed, and although he created no end of interest
+among the rest of the fellows in the room, who whistled and called to
+him, he refused to leave his new-found "bunkie." He just sat tight. He
+even stayed when I got up to go, but he looked at me with a most
+reproachful air, as if to say, "I think a lot of you even though you do
+want to leave me."
+
+He remained after every one had left the room and when I returned an
+hour later to get my mess kit for breakfast, he was still there.
+
+But the rattle of mess tins must have suggested something to him for
+when I got up to go this time he was right beside me, and he even braved
+the crush at the mess-hall door to stick near me.
+
+That dog never had so much to eat in all his young life as he got for
+breakfast that morning. First he visited our Japanese cook, who liked
+him and proved it by giving him a piece of meat. Then he visited the
+kitchen police, who found something for him, after which he made the
+rounds of the mess tables, coming back to me actually bloated with food.
+He looked up at me and I'll swear he grinned and tried to say: "This is
+the life--eh, Ol' Top?"
+
+"Local Board No. 163" has already become a favourite, but with all his
+petting from his many well-wishers, he seems to want to call me Boss.
+He's on the cot beside me now as I write, snoring with disgusting
+impoliteness, but I guess, being just a plain yellow dog, he don't know
+any better.
+
+This has been a day of visitors, and little work. Early this morning
+they began to arrive. I never saw so many motor cars anywhere, except at
+football games, or the races. And girls; thousands of them, and pretty,
+too. But shucks, I'm outclassed. In fact I began to feel like my dog
+to-day. I'll admit it was pretty soft for the fellows who had uniforms,
+but for the poor tramps like myself, who still wear their civilian
+clothes (or what is left of them, which isn't very much all told) it was
+sort of a lonesome day.
+
+[Illustration: Pretty soft for the fellows who had uniforms]
+
+Then there were the lucky fellows who had passes to leave camp. They
+looked fine, tramping down the road toward the station. Of course they
+were all uniformed; they are not allowed to leave camp unless they are.
+
+But "Local Board No. 163" and I take consolation in the fact that
+perhaps next Sunday we will be all spick and span in a nice new uniform,
+and then we'll strike for a pass, too, and go home and swagger about a
+bit ourselves.
+
+Feeling delightfully tired and sleepy; and I know I'll "press some of
+the creases out o' my blankets" to-night. This place seems almost
+comfortable and homelike now, and the men--well I've changed my original
+opinion of them considerably. They all (or most of them) have their
+hearts in the right place, and there aren't so many muckers as I thought
+there might be. In fact I'm beginning to like things mighty well; really
+enjoying myself. Only, hang it, I think I'm getting a good case of
+hives. Haven't been afflicted thus for about five years. If they keep up
+I'll report to the hospital shortly. "Come on 'Local Board No. 163'
+we'll turn in."
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+Several things of importance happened to-day. For one thing we got some
+clothes. I say _some_ clothes advisedly, for I'm not all clothed yet,
+being minus such important articles as an undershirt, socks and shoes.
+But those I brought from home, though sanctified and made holey by
+arduous labours in other fields, will do for the present. I possess a
+pair of winter breeches and a summer coat, but what matters that. It is
+sufficient to know that they fit, which is not the case in several
+instances, notably in that of friends Fat and Shrimp, who, I have
+learned, were not optimistic from the first about being fitted properly.
+It seems that from years of experience they have both learned never to
+expect to be fitted anywhere, anyhow. Fat's shirt covers him with an
+effort, but that is all. He can't find a shoehorn with which to get into
+his breeches. As for Shrimp: his belt is pulled tight about his chest
+and the sleeves of his tunic are rolled up to where his elbows should
+be, only to disclose the tips of his fingers.
+
+But I must confess to a grave error right here. It startled me this
+evening at retreat. Indeed, several things startled me this evening at
+retreat, including my fast developing case of hives.
+
+[Illustration: His belt is pulled tight about his chest]
+
+A few days ago I made some rather boorish and very sarcastic remarks
+about the possibilities of ever making soldiers out of the men I found
+myself among. I humbly take it all back and eat mud by way of apology.
+Khaki, a campaign hat and a shave, together with a certain amount of
+training in how to stand up straight and step off correctly, have made a
+vast difference. Why, hang it, I'm mighty proud to belong to this
+company. Jews, Italians, Poles, etc., all look like fighters; act like
+fighters; and a lot of them are fighters, too. Why they are soldiers
+already, and glad of it. Which leads me to state quite modestly the
+surprising fact that I think I am nearly a soldier, too, and gol-dinged
+set up about it. Honestly we looked fine this evening. What if there
+were a few misfits? A process of barter and exchange has already
+eliminated a great deal of that (save in the cases of Fat and Shrimp,
+who have gone back to civilian clothes until special uniforms are built
+for them) and when we lined up and snapped to attention while the band
+over on Tower Hill played "The Star Spangled Banner" and the old flag
+came slowly down, we looked like real soldiers every inch. We knew it,
+too, and I'll bet there wasn't a prouder company in the entire camp.
+
+[Illustration: Back to civilian clothes until a special uniform is
+built]
+
+Of course, I had to gum up the ceremony. But I guess I'll pay for it
+to-morrow. Here's how it happened:
+
+We've been drilling, drilling, drilling, all day to-day, drilling with a
+vengeance, and now we can do squads right and right front into line with
+as much pep and vigour as a company of Regulars. Our Sergeant said so,
+which is some admission for the old moss-back to make. Of course, we
+were tired. I was about ready to drop in my tracks when five o'clock
+came, which is time for evening parade or retreat; a very impressive
+ceremony by the way. My hives had been bothering me all day, and every
+time we were at ease, I got in some likely scratches in itchy places.
+
+One beautiful lump developed right under my arm just at five o'clock.
+Holy smokes, how it did itch! It was just as if something had staked an
+oil claim right there and wasn't losing any time about drilling a well.
+Of course, standing at attention a chap can't scratch, at least he's not
+supposed to--but I did. I tried to show extreme fortitude. I stood and
+stood and stood, and the darned thing kept boring and boring and boring.
+Then when the Lieutenants had their backs turned and stood at salute
+while the flag came down, I took a chance and scratched.
+
+That First Lieutenant of ours either has eyes in the back of his head or
+else the Sergeant is a tattletale. Anyhow, after the ceremonies and
+before we were dismissed, I was commanded to step out, whereupon I was
+given a most beautiful call down, after which I said, "thank you, sir"
+to a detail as kitchen police, for the next week to come starting
+to-morrow.
+
+When I got back here to my barracks the first thing I did was to peel
+off my shirt and look for that hive. I caught him. And then the whole
+terrible plot to get me detailed as kitchen policeman was revealed.
+"Local Board No. 163" has fleas; or, rather, he had 'em. I've got 'em
+now--no, wrong again. I got rid of them, or I hope I did.
+
+[Illustration: I picked him up in one hand and a cake of yellow soap in
+the other.]
+
+Upon making the hideous discovery, I summoned "Local Board No. 163" in
+court martial proceedings. He was guilty; I could see it by the way his
+spirit sagged in the middle when I began to cross-question him. I picked
+him up in one hand and a cake of yellow soap and a towel in the other,
+and we proceeded toward the shower baths. Bur-r-r-r but that water was
+cold. "Local Board No. 163" didn't enjoy it either, but I could with
+justice assure him that this form of punishment hurt me as much as it
+did him, and what is more I am likely to suffer a heap worse to-morrow.
+
+"Local Board No. 163," you sleep _under_ the bed to-night.
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+Too blasted tired to write to-night. I did a whole winter's work this
+morning. Shovelled nine tons (almost) of coal into the coal bin, as a
+starter. Then peeled a sack of potatoes, scrubbed an acre of floor and a
+half-acre of table tops and benches, washed twenty ash cans, and other
+kitchen utensils and--oh, I'm too tired now, think I'll wait until
+to-morrow.
+
+"Local Board No. 163" sleeps _out on the porch_ to-night.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+Still kitchen policing. Yesterday I thought I had pulled some job when I
+peeled an ash can full of potatoes, but that was nothing. To-day I got a
+better one. I had to peel the same amount of potatoes, only they were in
+a washboiler this time. Yes, right off the fire. I can't see why the
+Government has to serve potatoes with the jackets off anyway. Why don't
+they let the men peel them? They are just as well able to do it as we
+are. If some one ever wants to invent a choice way of punishing
+refractory prisoners in jail I suggest they send said refractors into
+the kitchen and give them the gentle job of peeling hot potatoes, by the
+washboilerful.
+
+I have a side partner on the kitchen police. His name is O'Flynn and he
+runs into even better luck than I do. To-day he shared the job of
+peeling "hot ones" with me. Yesterday while I had the little task of
+peeling 'em raw, he was handed the nice detail of attending to twelve
+pounds of onions; a tearful occasion, until some one with a conscience
+suggested that he get a bucket of water and peel them under water.
+O'Flynn got the water, with the remark that if he waited just a little
+longer the onion pan would have been full of tears, which he assumed
+would have served just as well.
+
+O'Flynn is kitchen policing because he tried to come into the barracks
+after taps. Lights out at ten and O'Flynn arrived about 2 G.M. He
+avoided the fire-guard successfully and went around to the back of the
+barracks. There he jimmied a window with his pocket knife and got it
+opened, only to have it fall on his neck when he was about half-way in.
+By way of exercise he put his elbow through it. Then to add to the
+situation he found himself in the darkened mess hall instead of the
+dormitory, and the noise he made when he knocked over several benches
+naturally grated on the Sergeant's nerves. Said Sergeant arrived in the
+hall in his union suit about the time O'Flynn had untangled himself,
+and, after cussing him out to perfection, he handed the Irishman a week
+at kitchen policing.
+
+"And now," said O'Flynn, "t' next time I come in through t' windey, I'll
+stay out."
+
+A week of this and I'll be able to qualify as a first rate housekeeper
+for a lumber camp. Already I can lay down a few very necessary rules
+which the average housewife will appreciate, as for instance:--
+
+1. Never take it for granted that a man has only one appetite. We have
+two hundred and seventy men here, but they carry around an aggregate of
+six hundred appetites.
+
+2. Never plunge your hands into an ash can full of greasy water without
+first removing your wrist watch.
+
+3. Never attempt to mop up after your men folk. Just turn the hose on,
+lash the nozzle to a convenient table leg and walk away and forget about
+it.
+
+4. In carrying out a pan full of hot ashes never grab the handle. Thrust
+a stick through it, it saves the temper and the floor.
+
+5. Never let any one kid you into trying to take the black off the
+kitchen pans with sapolio, rather throw the pans away.
+
+[Illustration: Never let anyone kid you into trying to take the black
+off the kitchen pans]
+
+Delightfully brief and entertaining job, that of removing the black from
+ash cans that are used to cook soup in. Our Mess Sergeant, the pirate,
+noticed that for about three seconds during this afternoon I wasn't
+doing anything in particular, so he gave me a cake of sapolio and a mop
+and told me to get busy and shine up the outside of the pots and pans
+and get all the black off. I went to it and stuck--until our Jap cook,
+the slant-eyed angel, came in about two hours later and told me the
+honourable ash cans always got blacked up again so what's the use; and
+anyhow he wanted to use the mop. I almost kissed him.
+
+Thank goodness the coal shovelling is all over with. Finished it
+yesterday. To-day during my moments of leisure I split a few cords of
+kindling wood and carried it into the kitchen, but I like splitting wood
+better than heaving coal when it comes to making a choice.
+
+I've been very popular with "Local Board No. 163," since I've been in
+the kitchen. Honestly, if that dog had intelligence enough, I could
+almost believe that he induced that flea to start this dirty work, for
+he's the only one in the whole company who has benefited by it. He hangs
+around the galley all the time and is waxing fat, prosperous and greasy;
+greasy because he got in the way of some dishwater that was being
+emptied out the back door. And now I'll have to give him another
+scrubbing before we turn in, or he'll be crawling in under my blankets
+again.
+
+Strange I haven't received any letters yet. Some chaps are lucky.
+Letters seem to make a big difference in things, even if it's only
+listening in on some other fellow's. Every one reads letters out loud so
+that we can all enjoy them, for letters, no matter whom they are from,
+are real events here and one always gets a sinking feeling when he
+discovers there aren't any for him.
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+Real luck at last. No more kitchen policing, thank goodness. It all
+happened thus:
+
+About the time we had cleaned up the remains of breakfast and I was
+getting ready to turn out for "settin' ups," along comes the Captain
+with two Lieutenants in tow, all with official looking papers. We lined
+up and he looked us all over very critically. Then he read:
+
+"Any members of this company qualified to fill the following positions,
+step one pace," and a list of occupations followed that included
+everything from barber to horse trainer and stage carpenter. Quite a few
+of us stepped out. About ten of the Italian contingent responded at the
+word barber. Fat came forward as stage carpenter, and when he said
+artist I stepped three paces forward instead of one and, saluting,
+handed him my recommendation for the Camouflage Corps. I knew I wasn't
+doing quite the proper thing. But you see we were all young and innocent
+of such things as military courtesy, and the Captain overlooked the fact
+that one pace didn't mean three, and after he had mentally debated the
+question of calling me down in front of the company and had given me the
+benefit of inexperience, he read the recommendation.
+
+[Illustration: Fat was looking for the same barracks]
+
+The result was that I was ordered to report immediately to the 2-6
+Company, 5-2 Depot Battalion. And with visions of avoiding physical
+exercises for about two hours and the preparing of a midday meal, I
+needed no urging. I gathered up my bed, hay mattress, blankets and all
+and proceeded to find the barracks of the 2-6 Company, 5-2 Depot
+Battalion.
+
+Of course, it had to be located at the other end of the twenty-four
+square miles of reservation. But I had company. Fat, loaded down like a
+dromedary under bed, blankets, a suitcase and all, was looking for the
+same barracks. So we started on our wanderings together, hopeful of
+finding our new home before dinner was served.
+
+We found it. And we found a lot of other fellows looking for the same
+home. It seems this Depot Battalion, of which I am now a part, is
+composed entirely of specialists, lawyers, linguists, engineers,
+artists, architects, carpenters and what not, and just about the time we
+were being transferred, other specialists were being selected from other
+companies and sent on their way to the Headquarters Divisions of the
+various regiments. So our corner of the camp has been quite popular all
+day, with men staggering in under loads of personal belongings like a
+lot of gipsies looking for new places to hang their O.D's.
+
+We, I mean Fat and myself, are among a different class of fellows now
+and this moving business has changed my opinion of the camp. From a hit
+or miss proposition as it first appeared, it has become a very
+systematic and well-organized cantonment. It is being worked out like a
+gigantic piece of machinery and there isn't any question in my mind now
+but that we will all, sooner or later, fit into the places where we will
+be able to serve the Government best. Here I have been trying for months
+to discover how I can get into the Camouflage Corps, which so far as I
+could learn was a mythical organization which no one knew very much
+about. Meanwhile, I have been hoping to keep out of the draft army for
+fear of being side-tracked and given a bayonet, instead of a paint
+brush, to beat the Huns with.
+
+[Illustration: Material for the camouflage unit]
+
+And here I am conscripted, and inside of a week singled out as material
+for the Camouflage unit, with a nice place waiting for me to stay until
+said unit needs me. They are doing it up in really businesslike fashion
+and no doubting it.
+
+But in the shuffle I've lost my dog. He's only been with me a few days
+and he's done nothing but get me into trouble all the time, yet I miss
+the little beggar. He wasn't about when I gathered up my belongings this
+morning, and I haven't had time to look him up all day. Perhaps, before
+taps I'll wander down to the other barracks and see if I can find him.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+Real work began in earnest here this morning, for the officers in
+command of the various companies of the Headquarters Divisions, or Depot
+Battalions, or whatever it is these particular departments are called,
+are determined to rush our drill instructions as fast as possible,
+because there is no telling when any one or any number of us will be
+needed somewhere else in the U. S. A. or in France, all of which sounds
+promising for a quick change. I'm willing, and I sure hope it's France.
+
+Our day is just filled full of hay-footing and straw-footing and squads
+righting and all that sort of thing. I am learning things gradually by
+dint of much cussing on the part of our Sergeant, who is also late of
+the Regular, and who certainly has as choice a vocabulary as our former
+drillmaster.
+
+We must have a very capable Mess Sergeant in this barracks, for the
+meals here are mighty good; better than those we received in the other
+barracks. We actually had ice cream and tea this noon, a thing unheard
+of in most of the barracks.
+
+And our cook is a wonder. He's an old cockney sea-dog, who looks like a
+regular buccaneer, and he has a parrot, too, whom he calls Jock. Jock
+spends most of his time sitting on the edge of the coal bin shrieking
+"Lazy Pig." But neither Jock nor his master has a sense of humour; the
+cook gets mad when he finds a man trying to ring in a third helping and
+when he gets mad, Jock screams: "Lazy pig, lazy pig," and dances up and
+down in a frenzy.
+
+[Illustration: Our cook looked like a regular buccaneer.]
+
+I went back to the old barracks last night, to find the place almost
+filled with new men, all worried looking and pale, and much disturbed
+over that first night horror, the "needle." I didn't relieve their
+mental anguish a particle, which was most unchristian-like.
+
+Several of the men remaining from the former company told me that most
+of the original company had been split up between the "Suicide Club"
+which is the machine gun companies, the transportation division and the
+infantry. As for "Local Board No. 163" no one had seen him about.
+Possibly he has become disgusted with high-toned individuals who object
+to fleas, and has gone off and joined the infantry. Well I wish him
+luck.
+
+I really believe I'm taking a very deep interest in this soldiering
+after all. I didn't think I would at first, but now I find I'm watching
+the colour of my hat cord with interest. I want to see it lose its
+newness and get faded-out looking, like a regular soldier's hat cord.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+On the camp calendar, to-day is marked down as a half-holiday, which is
+another one of the pleasant little jokes they have down here. It is a
+half-holiday. We quit drilling at twelve o'clock. But there is a Sunday
+ceremony they have called inspection and sometimes when the Lieutenant
+wants to leave camp early on Sunday he decides to hold inspection on
+Saturday afternoon.
+
+About twelve o'clock some one reminds some one else that the
+aforementioned ceremony is on the program of weekly events, and thereby
+spoils the whole pleasure for the day. At inspection the Lieutenant
+saunters through the barracks, inspects the beds and the stacks of
+underclothing, socks and similar equipment piled thereon, and if said
+underclothing, etc., do not show signs of recent acquaintance with soap
+and water, almost anything is likely to happen.
+
+And, of course, since no one is systematic about doing washing, all the
+dirty clothing and extra socks pile up until Saturday, and then on the
+half-holiday the scrubbing tables in the rear of the barracks are the
+most popular playgrounds.
+
+The washing process is interesting. Every one lines up and dips into the
+same basin of water. Government soap is supplied in quantities, so are
+the scrubbing brushes. One lays his jeans and undershirt out nice and
+smooth on a long table, pours a basin of water over them, applies the
+soap as if it were a holy-stone until the underclothing is covered with
+a soft yellow scum. And then he spends the rest of the afternoon trying
+to get the soap off. The more lather a chap makes the better washerman
+he is, from all appearances.
+
+The rear of the barracks on a Saturday afternoon looks like a string of
+tenement house backyards, with flapping garments hanging from
+everything, including the electric light wires, and men in various
+degrees of attirement stand around waiting for the garments to get dry.
+Oh, you daren't leave them and go off on some other mission while the
+wind does its duty. You simply have to stick and keep a careful eye on
+everything you own, otherwise:--well it works on the principle that the
+man who grabs the most is the best-dressed man for the following week,
+and if you are not there to prove ownership you are liable to find a
+pocket handkerchief where your undershirt was and the handkerchief isn't
+always what it was originally intended to be.
+
+I did manage to get my wash done and gathered up in time to see the last
+ten minutes of a Gaelic football game over on the parade grounds. But
+next week I'm going to take the advice of the Sergeant who suggests that
+I follow the example of Regular Army men and wash each piece as it
+becomes soiled. I wonder if I am systematic enough for that?
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+No I didn't draw a pass. I've been around camp the whole bloomin' day,
+but there were about fifteen thousand lucky fellows who did draw passes.
+I saw them going down in groups for every train to the city since four
+o'clock yesterday afternoon. But Fat and I seem to be a bit unlucky.
+Poor Fat, he has wanted a pass to get home and see his mother ever since
+he has been here. But a pass wouldn't do him much good. He hasn't any
+uniform yet. Still waiting for the army tailors to get busy. I wouldn't
+be surprised if they shipped him to France with no more Government
+property than a khaki shirt. We've been consoling each other most of the
+day. Fat's a good chap and a mighty likeable fellow.
+
+It has been a day of rest, however, for all except Giuseppi, the
+company's barber. He has done a tremendous business; shaved every one,
+from the Captain down.
+
+[Illustration: Giuseppi's methods are unique and interesting]
+
+Giuseppi's methods are unique and interesting. Somewhere he found two
+planks, which he brought into the dormitory, and, by catching the lower
+ends under the iron work of one cot and propping them against the side
+of another, he contrived an affair that resembles remotely a steamer
+chair. Line forms to the right. Bring your own brush and shaving stick
+and do your own lathering for a quick and effective shave.
+
+I can't guess how many he shaved. The line stretched the length of the
+dormitory from breakfast to dinner time. The men dabbed their brush into
+a single basin of cold water and moistened their faces while standing in
+line. Then as they moved on they soaped and lathered their own faces and
+rubbed it in thoroughly. And by the time they reached the plank their
+bristles needed only a final application of lather and Giuseppi got busy
+with the razor.
+
+He is a wonder. All he did this morning was strop and shave, strop and
+shave, and at ten cents a head--no I mean face--(twenty cents a head, only
+no hair cut on Sunday) I guess he made a fair week's wages. As each
+victim left the planks, said victim wiped the remaining lather from his
+face, ears and nose and applied his own talcum powder.
+
+Perhaps Giuseppi's business was increased by his announcement: "No shava
+for tree days now. To-morrow I getta da needle for twice times. No can
+use my arm vara moch."
+
+Which reminds me that I am scheduled for my second inoculation
+to-morrow.
+
+I have been discovering some of the unknown who are in our midst.
+Unearthed a popular song writer (whose income before he adopted the
+dollar-a-day job for Uncle Sam was reputed to be $10,000 a year). I
+didn't unearth him really. He bobbed up this morning, when several of
+the fellows were playing mouth organs, and now, behold, he's organizing
+a glee club. Then there is a linguist, who is fresh from the biggest
+financial institution in the world where he handled all their French and
+Spanish translation work. He has started a class in French which is in
+session for an hour every evening. We are all _Parlez vous_-ing with
+more or less (mostly more) inaccuracies. But what we lack in accent and
+correct pronunciation we make up for in genuine Parisian gestures. Oh,
+we're there all right.
+
+Another of our enterprising members is a well-known landscape gardener,
+who, in co-operation with one of our several architects, has organized a
+campaign for a "barracks beautiful," all of which doesn't mean very much
+to most of us, but gives them a good opportunity to dispose of their
+spare time. Our afternoons have been spent in pulling stumps in the
+vicinity of the barracks and grading the street and dooryard until now
+no one would ever recognize it for the same place. But the landscape
+gardener has carried the work a bit further and with the assistance of
+several of us, including myself, gone off into the woods and dug up a
+score or more of pine and cedar saplings about five feet high. These
+have been transplanted in the form of a hedge around our barracks, on
+top of a tiny terrace, and they certainly soften the outlines of the
+unpainted building and add a touch of that which is lacking in the
+vicinity of most of the structures.
+
+He, the landscaper, has placed whitewashed stones at conspicuous
+corners, too, and on either side of our tiny porch he has worked out the
+number of the company and the number of the division in concrete
+letters, which the camp orderly scrubs industriously every morning to
+keep them white and presentable. The job of camp orderly, by the way, is
+the worst job a man can be detailed to here, being one degree lower than
+kitchen police; and since I know mighty well the rigours of that, I'm
+going to steer clear of this other form of punishment, if it is humanly
+possible to do so.
+
+The Sunday crop of visitors flocked to camp as usual to-day and I
+entertained several who did not come to see me especially, but who
+brought along such delightful lunch that I felt constrained to show them
+about and be pleasant to them at least while the lunch lasted.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+We were excused from drill this morning for the purposes of being shod
+and getting our second inoculation. Getting our shoes was the most
+interesting and least painful of the two.
+
+After being shot (in the left arm this time) we proceeded to the Q. M.,
+where in one portion of his domain shoes were being issued, two pairs to
+a man, one pair for work and the other for rest and fatigue.
+
+Of course, immediately the fitting began the men started to protest that
+they were insulted by being given shoes too large for them. But that
+didn't disturb the shoe man, who merely told them to mind their own
+business and he'd take care of their feet, which belonged to the
+Government anyhow.
+
+[Illustration: Each man was loaded with a fifty pound bag of sand.]
+
+Standing on a flat surface in stocking feet, each man was loaded with a
+fifty pound bag of sand. Then when his feet had spread as much as they
+possibly could, measurements were taken from every angle, just exactly
+as if the shoes were to be built especially for the foot they were to
+adorn. The collection of figures was then gone over, and compared with a
+chart, after which two pairs of shoes were found corresponding with the
+dimensions covered by number so-and-so. I've forgotten what my number
+is, but I will confess that while the shoes are several sizes larger
+than I would ever think of buying in a shoe store, I have never had
+anything on my feet that gripped my heels and instep and ankles so
+firmly and yet allowed me room enough to wiggle my toes around. The
+dress shoes and the trench brogans of unfinished leather with half-inch
+soles filled with hobs, and steel plated heels, feel more comfortable
+than any shoes I have ever owned, and I gratefully accepted the two
+pairs issued to me and left for my quarters.
+
+[Illustration: "I like t' geev da Kais a keek in da face wid-a dose
+shoes"]
+
+On my way up the road I passed an Italian who seemed so pleased with his
+new footwear that he just couldn't help exhibiting them to me. "Look,"
+he said, waving his huge foot, shod with the trench shoes, about
+promiscuously, "look ad da shoos. I like t' geev da Kais a keek in da
+face wid-a dose shoos. Bet he no smile some more dan." Then he added, by
+way of showing his qualifications to muss up the Kaiser, "I belonga to
+ah wreckin' crew sometimes when I don't come down here."
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+SWEAR; If you can't think of anything else to say, but do it
+softly--very, very softly, so no one else but yourself will hear you.
+
+Thus reads the sign that hangs over the door of the Y. M. C. A. shack,
+at the end of our camp street. That's what I call social work humanized.
+The Y. M. C. A. here is the most human institution in this big, rawly
+human community. It is the thing that puts the soul in soldier as one
+chap expresses it. And because it is that way, and because the men feel
+at home and have a real time, and can smoke and put their feet on the
+table, they think the red triangle is the best little symbol about the
+big camp. The "'Sociation" is making thousands of friends every day
+among these strapping big, two-fisted fellows who really never knew what
+the organization was. It's bully. We all wander over there sometime
+during every evening, if it's only to listen to a new record on the
+phonograph.
+
+[Illustration: Our $10,000 a year song writer]
+
+The shacks (I don't know how many there are, but there must be at least
+a dozen of them) are the centres of amusement and entertainment for us
+all. And we have some corking concerts and other forms of entertainments
+there. I don't think I'll ever forget our $10,000 a year song writer as
+he appeared last night, for instance, standing on top of the piano, his
+hair all mussed up and his army shirt opened at the throat, singing a
+solo through a megaphone. And it was some solo! About fifteen hundred
+huskies in khaki stood around and listened to him and joined in on the
+choruses.
+
+Then they have lectures: "Ten Years as a Lumber Jack," "Farthest North,"
+by a certain well-known explorer; "My First Year of the Big War," and
+similar subjects appear on the bulletin boards every other night.
+Nothing of the Sunday School variety about that sort of thing.
+
+And our prize fights!
+
+I'm all excited yet over the one I saw to-night. It was a whale of a
+battle; I mean the last one was, there being several on the program. The
+fellows fight for passes to go home on Sunday and the decision is left
+up to the onlookers. And if we don't make the scrappers work for those
+passes, then no "pugs" ever did work.
+
+Most of the boxers are former pugilists who have been gathered up in the
+draft net, and so long as they can get a chance to put on the gloves
+they are just as pleased to be here as anywhere else from all
+appearances. But sometimes the scrappers aren't "pugs" at that; just
+plain citizens who possibly have been shadow boxing in the secrecy of
+their bedrooms for the past ten years and longing for courage enough to
+step into the ring with a real fighter and discover how good (or how
+bad) they are. They are getting the opportunity here all right, and some
+of them are uncovering a likely line of jabs and counters. One
+fair-haired youngster downed a mighty pugnacious-looking Italian a few
+nights ago.
+
+But to-night's final was a winner. Three scraps had been pulled off with
+real enthusiasm and after the final round, there was a call for more
+material, but no one in the crowd came forward to put on the gloves.
+There were calls and jeers and all that sort of thing, then suddenly out
+from the crowd stepped a soggy-looking, little red-haired fellow.
+
+Yells of "Yah Redney!" "Hi Redney!" "Good boy Brick Top!"
+
+Redney blushed considerably and held up his hand for silence. And when
+he got it he explained.
+
+"I ain't a-going to fight no one but our Mess Sergeant. That's what I'm
+out here for, and I'll stick here till he comes."
+
+Calls for Mess Sergeant. He wasn't present. A speeding messenger from
+Red's company hurried out through the night to find him. Ten minutes
+later, said Sergeant, a soggy-looking chap himself, was brought in and
+amid yells from the crowd he stepped inside the ring. He looked once at
+Brick Top, then spat on his hands and said:
+
+"Where's them gloves?"
+
+Gloves were produced and laced on, then without the preliminary
+handshake they squared off and went to it. And what a battle! They
+didn't stop for rounds, or time out, or anything. They just ducked and
+punched and whaled away at each other until the blood began to spatter
+all over and still they kept at it. I don't know what the
+misunderstanding between them was and didn't find out, but they sure
+meant to settle the thing once and for all.
+
+And the spectators; they went wild.
+
+For ten minutes steadily the fighters milled and I never saw a better
+slugging match. The Sergeant had had more experience in boxing, that was
+certain, but what Red lacked in skill he made up for in hitting power.
+Every time his glove met the Sergeant's face it smacked as loud as a
+hand clap.
+
+[Illustration: They didn't stop for rounds, or time out, or anything.]
+
+Then just when it seemed as if they must be tired out, there was a
+sudden clash and a whirl of fists and Redney ducked away and started one
+from the floor. It was an uppercut and it found a clean hole between the
+Sergeant's two arms, and met him flush on the point of the jaw. He
+staggered, tried to fall into a clinch, missed the elusive Redney and
+went down with a thump.
+
+"1-2-3-4-5-6-" counted the referee.
+
+The Sergeant rolled over and tried to get up. "Don't hold me down; lemme
+at him," he said huskily. But no one was holding him down. It was his
+refractory nerves. They wouldn't obey his will power.
+
+"7-8-9-10," tolled off the fateful numbers. Then what a yell went up for
+Redney, and Red, almost all in, himself, evidently had satisfied his
+grudge, for he went over and helped stand the groggy Sergeant on his
+feet.
+
+And all agreed it was some battle.
+
+But the Y.M. shacks aren't dedicated to prize fights and swearing and
+concerts entirely. They are the nearest approach to home or club life
+that most of us come in contact with for weeks at a stretch. The big,
+open hearths with their crackling logs are mighty fine places to spend a
+pleasant hour or two. Then there are the writing tables, and the reading
+rooms with their books and magazines, and the phonographs.
+
+The other night I saw a great big fellow, with burly fists and a stubbly
+beard on his chin (it must have been the night before his bi-weekly
+shave, which is as often as most of us can find time--or the inclination
+to use a razor) snuggled up close to the phonograph and listening
+attentively to the "Swanee River," which he was playing as softly as the
+instrument would permit, and now and then he would blow his nose in a
+big handkerchief and wipe suspicious signs of moisture from the corners
+of his eyes. He was having a regular sad drunk and enjoying every moment
+of it. I'll bet he thought he was the most homesick mortal in camp.
+
+Then there are the telephone booths. Every night there is a line of at
+least fifty men waiting patiently for a chance in the booth. At a dollar
+a call they ring up the folks in the city and have five minutes' chat
+with them, just by way of warding off an attack of homesickness. I've
+used the booth five dollars' worth to date.
+
+These army breeches I'm wearing, I noticed to-night, are very
+comfortable. I like the deep, straight pockets in them. I think I'll
+have my civilian suit made with those kind of pockets hereafter. But I
+haven't gotten over the habit of pulling them up each time I sit down so
+that they won't get baggy at the knees.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+Found my dog!
+
+I was over in another section of the cantonment this morning, for a few
+moments between drill and mess call, and there was "Local Board No. 163"
+as big as life, trotting along beside a chap I knew. It was Billy Allen.
+The dog recognized me and so did Billy and we stopped a while and
+compared notes.
+
+Billy had the worst hard luck story in respect to the Draft of any man I
+know. He's an old National Guardsman, having enlisted soon after we left
+school together. Spent eight years in the infantry, and went to the
+Border. He left the service after he got back and a little later when a
+call came for men for the Officers' Reserve Corps he applied and was
+accepted, for the second camp. Meanwhile he had registered as a man of
+draft age. Then came his call for Officers' Training Camp, where he was
+making out famously; so well in fact that he was recommended for the
+aero-plane service.
+
+But the recommendation was as far as he got. The drawing had meanwhile
+been made in Washington, he was well up in the list and one fine day he
+received a notice to appear for examination. Of course he passed and was
+accepted. That yanked him out of the Officers' Reserve and now he's down
+here, a private in the "Suicide Club," with Buck Winters, an old
+classmate of both of us, his commanding officer.
+
+I told him about "Local Board No. 163" whom he had dubbed "Mut" because
+he looked it. First we were going to match for the dog, but we decided,
+after a moment's reflection, to let him choose his master. Billy said
+good-bye and walked one way and I walked the other and the dog, after a
+moment's hesitation, went with Billy. And so I lost my dog a second
+time. I guess he didn't like my cold water treatment for fleas.
+
+An interesting thing happened here to-day that just shows how vast this
+huge cantonment is. The cot next to Fat and two below me has been vacant
+ever since we have been here. To-night a chap came in from the barracks
+next door, bag and baggage, and took possession of it. Fat made his
+acquaintance right off, and the newcomer told him that he had been
+transferred to this company about the time we were--a week or so ago--and
+since no one told him where to go or where to bunk he went to the
+barracks next door and took a cot.
+
+But he really belonged in here and was a member of our squad, which for
+some mysterious reason had always remained a seven-man squad, with the
+eighth man assigned to it but never heard from. Every roll call he had
+been marked absent, and he had been put down as a deserter and an alarm
+sent out for him through the country. At the present moment the New York
+police are searching diligently for him.
+
+[Illustration: I guess he didn't like my cold water treatment for fleas]
+
+And all the time he has been within a biscuit toss of his proper place.
+
+Over in the other company he was an outcast, and they didn't know what
+to do with him. They were on the point of sending him back to the city
+as an interloper when somehow the mistake was discovered and he was
+summoned to report over here. The interesting part of it is, that he is
+an expert accountant, and his specialty is searching out mistakes that
+other people make in the way of misplaced figures and things.
+
+So far as the police were concerned, he said, he didn't care much, for
+the last place they would ever look for him was down here. Speaking of
+deserters, I noticed three sets of finger-prints on our bulletin board
+which means that three men have taken French leave and they have prices
+on their heads, already.
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+This has been a moist and soggy day. I don't know that I have ever seen
+so much rain before in one storm as I have to-day. Before daylight it
+began; a perfect downpour, so violent that for reveille we lined up in
+the mess hall. None of us ventured out to wash up, but those of us who
+missed a cold sprinkle the most had merely to poke our heads out of the
+windows for a moment and then reach for a towel. Some wetness.
+
+The camp is a veritable sea of mud, and those who go outdoors at all do
+so to the imminent peril of becoming mired and never returning. From the
+mess-hall windows at breakfast we could watch the big heavy motor truck
+of the transportation train, skidding and sloshing about in the road,
+down which flooded a perfect torrent of muddy rain water. Several of
+them became hopelessly stuck in the sticky mud, and their drivers
+abandoned them and raced for cover in the Y. M. C. A. shack. Officers
+and men everywhere have given up all idea of outdoor work and the camp
+streets look forlorn and deserted. They stretch away down the hill to
+fade into the misty blur of the rain itself, and on either hand stand
+the long, unpainted barracks buildings, with dripping eaves and rain
+blowing in sheets from their tinned and tar-papered roofs. Outside, it
+is a dismal, deserted-looking cantonment, with scarcely a sign of life,
+save now and then a venturesome canine mascot scuttling from one
+sheltered spot to another.
+
+Drilling, of course, is utterly impossible and the nearest approach we
+have had to anything resembling military training to-day is a lecture on
+sanitation in the mess hall by the First Lieutenant.
+
+But the rain has not dampened our desires for amusement and as a result
+the interior of the sleeping quarters presents, at the present time, a
+picture that only a Remington could do justice to. Atmosphere sticks out
+all over the place. Army overcoats, tunics, variegated comforters,
+blankets, mess kits, sweaters and flannel shirts are hanging from every
+peg, and men are sprawled on their cots, in various attitude, some
+trying hard to sleep, some writing, one man thoughtfully locating the
+notes of a new tune on a mouth organ, while another over in the
+corner--an Italian--is the centre of an enthusiastic group, while he plays
+doleful things on an old accordion he has smuggled into camp. The air is
+blue with tobacco smoke.
+
+A number of us are writing, including myself, but the chief centres of
+interest are the two big poker games and the big crap game down at the
+end of the room.
+
+They are all playing with that oppressive quietness that portends big
+stakes. I was startled a while ago upon walking over to the nearest
+group to discover eighty dollars, in ones, fives, and tens on the top of
+the army cot that served as a table in a single jack pot, and they were
+still betting. Our two Regular Army Sergeants are members of one group
+and Fat is sitting in at another. From the length of time he has stayed
+and the smile on his face, I can only guess that luck is with him for
+once.
+
+But it has failed a lot of others. Now and then a man leaves one game or
+the other, looking sort of hopeless. There is always some one to take
+his place, however.
+
+One of these fellows, gone broke, hit upon a happy idea which caused no
+end of interest for an hour or two this afternoon. After he had gone
+broke he left the game and sat thoughtfully on the edge of his cot for a
+while. Then he dug down into his duffel bag under his cot and brought
+forth a razor. Speedily he made up some raffle tickets on slips of note
+paper and presently, with the razor in one hand and his campaign hat in
+the other, he started through the room selling chances on the razor at a
+dime a chance. The raffle was held over in our corner, and one lucky
+chap got the razor, easily worth two fifty, for a single dime and the
+erstwhile owner, with five dollars worth of change in his pockets,
+returned to the game.
+
+That started the raffle bug, and presently a wrist watch was put up,
+then another razor of the safety variety, a fountain pen, an extra hand
+knitted sweater which some one had luckily acquired, several boxes of
+crackers which every one took a chance on at a cent a chance and a
+variety of other things. But the crackers were the most popular and that
+helped one ingenious and venturesome chap to evolve a money-making
+scheme.
+
+In the height of the rainstorm, he was seen to don his slicker, and
+hurry out into the storm. He splashed all the way over to the Post
+Exchange (about half a mile) to return a half-hour later with four pies
+for which he had paid forty cents each and three dozen boxes of crackers
+all in good condition. The crackers went for double their value and the
+pies he successfully split up into twelve fair-sized portions which sold
+for ten cents each. That trip in the rain netted him nearly seven
+dollars he told me, and that seven dollars later on, invested in the
+crap game, trebled itself; so, all things considered, he has had a more
+or less successful day.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+It is fast getting home to me now that in spite of the heterogeneous
+conglomeration, of races and creeds and languages, the National Army is
+going to be the real thing as a fighting force after all. Every one is
+keen for the thing now that the first violent attacks of homesickness
+have worn off and they are going at their work of becoming soldiers with
+a will, except, of course, for a few: the conscientious objectors; and
+their life is no merry one. They are mighty unpopular, as numerous black
+eyes attest. Every one takes the slightest opportunity to emphasize
+their displeasure at the stand these men have taken. And some of them
+are going around here under a cloud. For instance, the one in the
+Machine Gun outfit who drills in pumps and summer suit but who has the
+pleasure of knowing that after his soldiering is all over with, he has
+three years to spend in Atlanta or some other Federal jail for little
+things he has done and views he has expressed.
+
+We have one of the breed in our company, a Jew; and he's the most
+unpopular man in the outfit, even among those of his own race. All of
+this variety, (the "objectors" I mean), who have come to my notice, are
+sorry specimens of manhood for the most part and I can't blame an
+able-bodied chap for despising them.
+
+The foreign element is taking hold like real Americans. It is
+interesting to get their slant on the whole affair. Many of them didn't
+want to come. They had their own ideas of army life, suggested,
+doubtless, by tales they have heard of service in the European armies of
+former days. But when they were called they came; and behold, when they
+arrived and lived through the first days, they were surprised to find
+that they still were treated like human beings, had certain indisputable
+rights, were fed well and cared for properly and worked under officers
+who took a genuine interest in their welfare. This was something most
+unexpected. Right off they decided that they were going to get all they
+could out of this new life and give in return faithful and honest
+service.
+
+[Illustration: "Make-a me strong, make-a me beeg, an' best-a make-a me
+good American"]
+
+"It's fine, I like it," assured a little Italian friend of mine in the
+infantry. "I like it because it help make me spick good English, make-a
+me strong, make-a me beeg an' best-a what is, make-a me good American,
+jus like-a de boss Lieuten'."
+
+And in that last sentence, I believe, lies the charm of it all to most
+of the foreigners. They have learned that America and things American
+are fine and clean and good and their ambition now is to become a real
+American "jus like-a de boss Lieuten'." And when they get to be real
+Americans, they are going to be proud of the fact and they are going to
+fight to prove it; that's certain.
+
+The camp is still soggy to-day and we have drilled ankle deep in mud. My
+feet have been wet from the time I stepped out of the barracks until an
+hour ago, when I changed my socks and put on my dress shoes. But shucks,
+what appetites we brought back with us from the parade grounds. I never
+did care for fish, but I'll be hanged if I didn't eat three helpings of
+the creamed salmon and spaghetti to-night.
+
+A new wrinkle has developed here. We find out what the fellows are going
+to have for supper in nearby barracks and if the feed promises to be
+better than what we are to have several of us take our mess tins and go
+over and stand in line there. The Mess Sergeant never knows the
+difference.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+Sad news this evening. Only twenty-five per cent. of each company is to
+be allowed to go home to-morrow, because of the disorder and general
+trouble at the railroad terminal last Sunday. And the twenty-five per
+cent. is to be drawn out of a hat. No chance for Fat or me, that's
+certain. We're mighty unlucky when it comes to passes and we are laying
+odds now that neither of us will get permission to go to the city.
+Anyhow, Fat is still in the same predicament. If he does get a pass he
+won't be able to leave the camp.
+
+At the present writing we are all waiting for the mess call. And
+immediately after mess the Sergeant will do the drawing of the names for
+the passes. If I am not among the lucky ones I'm going to try and--there
+goes the mess call!
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+I am ready to die with a smile on my lips and a great happiness in my
+heart, for I've spent one night between clean sheets, on a really soft
+bed. I've eaten with a silver knife and fork from real dishes
+and--whispered softly--in the privacy of my own home I had a glass of
+beer!
+
+No, I wasn't lucky (neither was Fat) but I think I put something over on
+Uncle Sam.
+
+The passes for the city were drawn for as per schedule and since I was
+down at the bottom of the list I was not included in the first
+twenty-five per cent. The passes issued read for New York City, and the
+men holding them were privileged to leave by certain trains, being
+marched down to the station under the watchful eye of the Second
+Lieutenant.
+
+Then, after these men were all away, came the opportunity for the men
+who lived near the camp and the men who wanted to visit nearby towns to
+apply for leave. This was my opportunity. I applied for thirty-six
+hours' leave to visit the town of R----, twenty miles distant, and secured
+it.
+
+Back in the barracks an interesting scene was taking place, scores of
+tickets of leave had been handed out to the men, to take the night and
+following day off, but to get out of camp they must be able to pass
+inspection with perfect and well-fitting equipment, and since all of us
+had not our full outfit, we had to hustle around and borrow articles of
+clothing that would fit and look satisfactory. I, for instance, have a
+full winter uniform except for overcoat (which I have not received) and
+tunic, the one I am wearing being a summer coat of cotton and hardly
+matching the wool trousers I possess. So I had to join the crowd who
+were bartering, exchanging and renting uniforms. And since the first men
+to leave had done the same thing to a certain extent, there was not much
+desirable clothing left in the barracks. Overcoats were going at a
+dollar a day and breeches and jackets for fifty cents each. After a
+diligent search I did find a chap who had a winter tunic and summer
+trousers and, wonder of wonders, his jacket fit me perfectly. We made an
+exchange and I borrowed an overcoat at one dollar for the day, from a
+chap who was not leaving camp, and sallied forth.
+
+Tramping down Twenty-third Avenue (the streets are all named here and
+our barracks is on Fourteenth Street and Third Avenue), whom should I
+behold but friend Billy, bound in the same direction. He had had the
+same inspiration as I and he, too, had a pass for R----. We wandered on
+together, but upon reaching the railroad station, our hopes of getting
+to our destination were dashed. There were no more trains for R---- until
+the morning!
+
+We wept. But our tears didn't blind us to the fact that there were
+occasional machines passing along the highway. So we walked out and
+stood there in the moonlight and looked as lonesome and forlorn as
+possible.
+
+And the first machine to come along was a beautiful big Pierce Arrow
+limousine, with an old dowager, a pleasant and generous old soul, its
+single occupant, save of course the chauffeur. We went to R---- in style;
+and, moreover, we went there in a hurry, for with khaki in the machine
+the chauffeur assumed that he had the right of way and full permission
+to wreck the speed laws.
+
+At R---- we looked up time tables and discovered that we could get a train
+into the city at ten-thirty, which was not so bad. Then, because our
+passes really limited us to R----, we concluded that it was only fair to
+the Government to at least eat a meal in that town and since we were
+both hungry in spite of our recent mess, we searched for a restaurant.
+
+We found one; a French restaurant, which looked peculiarly deserted. The
+door was locked, for some strange reason, yet there were several men in
+aprons inside apparently hard at work. We rattled on the door and in a
+moment the frowning proprietor came forward. But the frown changed to a
+smile when he saw us. It was the khaki. He unbolted the door and, with a
+ceremonious bow, welcomed us in, then closed the door and bolted it.
+
+And then he explained that this was a new restaurant not yet opened for
+patronage. He expected to open up in a day or maybe two. But, of course,
+he could not turn away two hungry soldiers, never. _Merci non!_ He had
+nothing to serve us with, but what were our desires? Express them and he
+would send out for the provisions, cook them and serve them. Steak!
+Indeed, yes. In twenty minutes we would have a wonderful steak, French
+fried potatoes, salad, coffee and ice cream. Jean would attend to it.
+
+And Jean did. He rustled up the steak and the rest and we alone occupied
+the restaurant, and soon were eating the most delicious piece of beef we
+believed we had ever put our teeth through. The bill! Nothing; nothing
+at all--what?--well if we insist, one dollar each. Thank you! And now here
+is a pen and some ink. You will please autograph each bill and behold,
+when you return from glorious France, covered with glorious glory, you
+should come in and see these two bills--the first money taken in at the
+restaurant--framed and hanging there over the desk. And so, I suppose,
+the future generation of visitors to R---- will be able to view these
+immortal monuments to our--I don't know what, unless it be our khaki
+uniforms--hanging there in the French restaurant possibly surrounded by
+wreaths as each anniversary of day before yesterday rolls 'round.
+
+We got the ten-thirty train for the city, and we almost got into trouble
+too; or at least I did, for as we hurried into the smoker whom should I
+see sitting buried in a magazine but the First Lieutenant of our
+Company. Had he made the trip the same way we did? I don't know and, of
+course, I didn't ask. We just walked through the car very swiftly and he
+never looked up.
+
+It was fifteen minutes of midnight when I arrived home, let myself in
+with my latch key which I have been carrying as a silent reminder of my
+former terrifically wild (?) career; routed out the folks, and sat
+swathed in bath-robe and dressing-gown until 3 o'clock, just talking. It
+was bully. And then I tumbled into my own bed and slept and slept and
+slept. I woke up at reveille all right--(it was just daylight)--grinned,
+rolled over and slept and slept and slept some more.
+
+Then I had a real bath in a real tub with real hot water, and a lot of
+real things to eat and real cigars to smoke and real friends to talk
+with until five o'clock in the afternoon, when I crawled into my
+regimentals once more, and went out to meet Billy by appointment.
+
+Going back via R---- route (which was necessary) curtailed our leave which
+really continues until to-morrow morning at reveille, but then we were
+very happy; so happy that when we arrived in R---- we chartered a taxi-cab
+for the twenty mile drive out here and now I'm nearly frozen through
+from the cold wind that blew in at us. And I'm tired, too, but I'm happy
+and ready to turn in ten minutes before taps.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+I'll need no "Melody in Snore Minor" to lull me to sleep to-night, for I
+am thoroughly weary. It was intimated a day or so ago that our training
+would be hurried a little so that we would be ready for a quick shift at
+any time. But hurried doesn't exactly describe it. It looks like an
+early fall drive to me.
+
+We began at the beginning, this morning, and had our squad drills all
+over again, and somehow in the juggling about of men to make up our
+company formation I managed to get last place in line, and pivot man in
+the front rank of the last squad.
+
+Before to-day I've been in the rear rank and had a screen of front-rank
+men to cover up any blunders I might make, but being in the first file
+gave me stage fright. And, of course, with the stage fright I
+bungled;--forgot which was left and which was right. We began by facing,
+and first chance I managed to turn left when the command was right. That
+blunder made me more self-conscious. If I had had to talk I'm sure I
+would have stuttered. As it was I stammered with my feet.
+
+Then "About Face."
+
+I faced about all right, only I pivoted on a stump root that some stupid
+had forgotten to dig out. The result was I lost my balance, and made
+several movements instead of one before I came to position.
+
+At drills the Sergeants, who do most of the drilling, are equipped with
+sticks about a yard long so that they can poke a rear-rank man in the
+back without disturbing the front-rank men, and thus call attention to
+blunders. Being a rear-rank man on the about face, I presently felt the
+stick poking into my ribs and the command:
+
+"You step out here."
+
+I stepped out, and was requested, along with much language, to go up in
+front of the company and give a demonstration in the proper method of
+"about facing."
+
+[Illustration: A demonstration in the proper method of "about facing"]
+
+My self-consciousness fled immediately. I was mad. I wanted to talk
+back, and make a few remarks about the Sergeant and the stump and
+things. But I suddenly thought of a tour of kitchen police and
+restrained myself. Instead I about faced with such energy that the
+Sergeant knew I was boiling inside, and being a decent sort of a chap,
+he sent me back to the ranks after a couple of demonstrations, instead
+of keeping me out there for fifteen minutes as I have seen them do to
+some fellows.
+
+After that I felt more at ease in the front rank. All morning long we
+ambled across the landscape, doing squad and company movements. It was
+just drill, drill, drill, for fifty out of every sixty minutes, the ten
+minutes being allowed as rest periods. We reviewed all our previous
+instructions and worked up to the point of forming company fronts, with
+the movements of right and left front into line and on right into line,
+and as pivot man, I think I did mighty well. Our squad never stepped off
+a pace ahead of time on any of the formations. And when we were marching
+back to the barracks at mess time, the Sergeant came up beside me, and
+remarked, by way of apology for hauling me out of the ranks earlier in
+the morning, that I was doing good pivot work.
+
+Perhaps we didn't enjoy mess! Three helpings of navy beans for me with
+pineapple marmalade, and a piece of salt pork on the side, not to
+mention three cups of coffee and three slices of bread. I sure had luck
+on the mess line to-day.
+
+This afternoon the First Lieutenant took charge of the company, and he
+had us traipsing all over the landscape again, doing the same sort of
+close order manoeuvres, and when we lined up just before retreat he
+announced that we would have rifles to-morrow morning.
+
+It is interesting to see how rumours travel and gather force in the
+barracks. Some one, somehow, heard that an artist and a stenographer
+from our company are to sail for France in a day or two. Of course, all
+my friends have come to the conclusion that I am the artist. A chap told
+me about it at mess this evening, and since then several dozen have
+looked me up to shake hands with me and tell me good-bye, with such
+remarks as: "Hear you have orders to sail for France to-morrow; great."
+"They tell me you got a commission from Washington and that you are
+going across in a day or two," or, "Say, you're a lucky chap; where'd
+you get the drag down in Washington?"
+
+But these queries fail absolutely to thrill me. I am quite calm and
+undisturbed. I deny any "drag" whatever, and I know that I am not the
+artist mentioned in the order for transfer, if there is any such order,
+which I doubt. This is only about the _n_th time that same rumour has
+been afloat as a result of which I have bade good-bye to my friends
+about every other day only to discover myself still with them a week
+later with the same old rumour bobbing up again.
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+I'm really a soldier. I know the manual of arms.
+
+This morning, true to the First Lieutenant's prediction, we drilled with
+rifles and now I am quite convinced of the truth of the old saying that
+a gun is dangerous without lock, stock, or barrel. Fat turned around
+suddenly when he had his rifle over his shoulder and poked the muzzle of
+it into my mouth; a regular Happy Hooligan performance, and now I have a
+split (and considerably puffed) lip and a loose tooth to my credit in
+this horrible war.
+
+We were marched over to one of the infantry barracks on the edge of the
+big parade grounds and there we found our rifles; I mean ours for the
+day only, because there are hardly enough in camp to equip us all yet
+and we have to take turns using them. In the same way there is only one
+field piece to each artillery company, but that doesn't seem to worry
+the artillery men much.
+
+They are doing some real drilling over on the other side of the camp. I
+was surprised to discover a company at work digging trenches, another
+company practising throwing hand grenades, with stones representing the
+deadly Mill's bombs, still another group constructing parapets of sand
+bags, and working out machine gun emplacements, and in the distance
+artillery companies hovering about a sleek looking gun, learning the
+complicated parts and where and how the animals are served.
+
+Krags, instead of Springfields, are the rifles available for drilling
+purposes here, and for the first hour this morning we devoted our time
+to learning the floor plan of the thing. I was getting along famously
+until Fat interrupted my investigations with the muzzle of his weapon.
+
+Soon after that we started drilling. And I think it is to our credit
+that before noon we had mastered all the movements and that our pieces
+snapped up to position with real vigour.
+
+"Let me hear them hands slap them pieces," said the Sergeant; then
+"Ri--sholler--harms! One-two-three-four! Pep, that's it, pep an' snap.
+Slap 'em hard. Ordah--harms! One-two-three! _Done_ drop 'em--_done_ slam
+'em down. Nex' man slams 'em gits kitchen p'lice."
+
+So we drilled until our arms ached, and rifles that weighed about eight
+pounds at the beginning of the drill seemed to have increased to fifty
+pounds, and felt as long as telephone poles. Perhaps we weren't glad
+when our First Lieutenant put a stop to the punishment and started us in
+the general direction of the mess hall.
+
+And we had beef stew for dinner; beef stew with rich brown gravy, such
+as our old biscuit shooter alone can make.
+
+But after mess we were back at it again. Only this time it was bayonet
+practice, but not of the variety pictured in most magazines. We haven't
+reached the stage of charging trenches and swinging bundles of sticks.
+Such advanced work comes later.
+
+Bayonets are awkward, ugly things, and I could not help being grateful
+that Fat took it into his head to poke me in the mouth with his rifle
+this morning instead of this afternoon. If he had waited until after
+mess he wouldn't have split my lip; he would have cut my head off. When
+I saw him with bayonet fixed I gave him a wide radius of action. Indeed
+I avoided him as if he were a plague.
+
+In open, or extended, order we lined up on the parade grounds in front
+of one of these movable elevated platforms. Our Second Lieutenant
+mounted this, and with a bayonetted rifle in hand went through the
+various lunges, thrusts and parries of the bayonet manual, meanwhile
+giving us a lecture, to the effect that no matter what the War
+Department intended to do with us, a knowledge of bayonet fighting would
+be essential. He assured us that the logical weapon for an American
+soldier was the rifle. One of our birthrights is markmanship and another
+is bayonet fighting. He briefly cantered over a century and a half of
+history of the Republic and pointed out how we had won fame and honour
+with bullet and bayonet, and he wound up by telling us that every
+American soldier should prepare himself so that he would be as dangerous
+to fool with as a stick of dynamite. Picture good-natured Fat
+impersonating a stick of dynamite.
+
+Then we went at it. We lunged and thrust and parried until perspiration
+began to stand out on our foreheads. From the corner of my eye I had a
+vision of Fat trying to disguise himself as a high explosive. Every time
+he lunged, he would scowl viciously and emit a loud grunt. I discovered
+a few moments ago, however, that it was a case of over-eating at mess
+time that caused him to grunt and frown every time he tried to move very
+fast; not a desire to look ferocious, although I guess it passed for
+that in the eyes of the instructor.
+
+And now I'm told we are to get this sort of training daily for a long
+period; close order formation in the morning, with rifle and bayonet
+drill in the afternoon and later on we will do skirmish work, trench
+work and open order work with rifles. Some of the infantry companies are
+already doing that. I was treated to the spectacle of two companies
+scurrying across the upper end of the parade grounds like so many
+rabbits. Now and then they would fling themselves down on their stomachs
+and begin snapping away merrily with empty rifles at an imaginary enemy.
+
+We are a tired-looking company to-night. Already half the cots are
+filled with men, some of them snoring lustily and it is only a quarter
+to ten.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+There are a lot of things calculated to stir a chap's sentimental streak
+about this camp, particularly the nights; moonlight nights like to-night
+for instance. Every hard outline of the huge place is softened under the
+blue-black mantle of night, and the disagreeable things are lost in the
+heavy shadows and the moonlight floods the open places, and glistens on
+the rows upon rows of tin roofs and tall, gaunt-looking tin
+smoke-stacks. Watch-fires (a sanitary precaution) blaze in their deep
+holes in the rear of each barracks building, and the lonesome
+fire-guard, bundled in his overcoat and with rifle over his shoulder,
+stands silhouetted against the night sky beside each flaring pit.
+
+Out on the main streets of the camp are thousands of fellows in khaki,
+walking aimlessly up and down, while in the by-streets between the
+barracks buildings one sees shadowy figures and glowing cigarette ends
+moving about in the darkness. Through the tiny panes of each barracks
+window, partly obscured by overcoats and sweaters which dangle from pegs
+inside, filters a warm yellow light, and as one moves down the row, one
+hears from one building the music of an accordion and the rhythmic
+shuffle of feet which tells of a "stag" dance being held in the mess
+hall; while from another comes the soft plunk-plunking of a banjo and
+the occasional drone of a mouth organ that seeks after harmony, but only
+succeeds with an effort.
+
+Off to the right toward the parade grounds some fellows are singing and
+their songs sound mighty good in the moonlight. And from far beyond
+where the thick pine woods stand out black against the sky comes faintly
+the hooting of a distant owl.
+
+On the main streets that skirt the outer edge of the cantonment on three
+sides, the arc lights glisten, like rows of far off diamonds against the
+velvet of a jewel box, and here and there, where two twinkle, like
+low-hung stars, stand out the Y.M. shacks where the men are gathering
+for an evening's recreation.
+
+It is wonderful to wander out such nights as these. Bundled in a sweater
+to keep out the chill of evening, and with only my pipe for company, I
+often go tramping off through the by-streets of the camp. The smoke of
+the hundreds of watch-fires is wafted to me on every breeze and in wood
+smoke there is a charm; the charm of camping out. Never in my life will
+I smell the smoke of burning pine wood, but that these nights will come
+trooping through my memory, and I'm certain that I will be homesick then
+and want to come back and live them all over again.
+
+And the things I often see:--the fire-guard for instance, who alone out
+there behind the barracks was trying hard to read a letter by the light
+of his flickering watch-fire. Was it a letter he had just received and
+could not wait to open, or was it a letter that he had read many, many
+times before and was rereading once again? Then the lonesome dog who sat
+out in the company street and stared up solemnly at the moon, like a
+lone wolf on the prairie. What instincts were being waked within him by
+the moonlight? And the silhouette through the window of the chap sitting
+on his cot patiently plying needle and thread and the two fellows who
+leaned against the jacketed field piece in front of an artillery
+barracks and talked in whispers, while through the opened door of the
+buildings on either hand came the noise of a rousing good time within.
+
+Then the tramp up Tower Hill, where the headquarters building with its
+darkened windows like sightless eyes stands out from the sparse remains
+of the pine woods, flecked here and there with patches of moonlight.
+
+Far off across the great camp, and across the tops of the pines one can
+dimly see from the top of the hill the ocean with the moonlight flashing
+on its surface, and occasionally comes a breath of chilled salt air that
+stirs a longing, vague and fleeting, as the ocean has always stirred a
+longing in the soul of the adventurer. From here one can look down upon
+the great camp. Thousands and thousands of roofs stand out in the
+moonlight, and the watch-fires twinkle in orderly rows up and down each
+camp street. Far off to the left are the big machine shops and forges of
+the construction company, the forge fires glowing red against the night,
+while faintly comes the far-off ring of anvils. Those forge fires, like
+the bakery fires, never die.
+
+To the eastward is the railroad terminal with its panting engines and
+its medley of noises, while nearer at hand but in the same direction is
+the transport headquarters with its ceaselessly moving caravan of
+rumbling, grumbling army trucks. All combines to make a picture that
+holds one spell-bound.
+
+The days here are pleasant indeed, but the nights are almost
+intoxicating. They cast a spell upon me and leave a memory that can
+never fade.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+This place looks like a growing mining town somewhere out West, but for
+real atmosphere, the civilian camp, outside the reservation, has the
+cantonment looking really civilized. I went out there this evening after
+mess; for I heard that there was a cigar store included in the outfit,
+and the impression I got was a lasting one. Everything of the frontier
+was there save the saloons and the gambling halls. Shacks, tents (rows
+upon rows of them), lean-tos and all forms of domiciles. And the men who
+walked the streets were of every variety, including real lumber jabs in
+mackinaws and spiked boots, who had come down to cut away the timber;
+Italians, Poles, Swedes, Slavs and what not, and a real cowgirl, in
+short skirts and high leather boots, with a silk handkerchief scarf,
+sombrero and a big thirty-eight strapped to her hip. She, I learned,
+runs a motor bus between the civilian camp and the nearest towns.
+
+Cook fires twinkled outside of the tents, lights showed through the
+canvas walls reflecting the huge, grotesque, shadowy figures of the
+occupants. From one emanated the strains of an accordion and from
+another the babble of voices that suggested a quarrel over a card game.
+
+I found the cigar store. I found other stores, too, just shacks thrown
+together, but carrying a stock of everything in the line of wearing
+apparel and eatables. One displayed the sign of "Jack's Unsurpassable
+Lunch," another "The Elite," and another "The Emporium." There were
+hundreds of squalid booth-like structures besides, where a host of
+curious things were for sale to the hordes of big-fisted, deep-chested
+men who were brought there to build the cantonment. But they tell me
+that the civilian camp is fast breaking up now, for the cantonment is
+almost completed. The remount stables for the artillery, the
+refrigerating plant and the huge bakery are all that remain to be built
+and the labourers are leaving in big groups.
+
+The temporary bakery (I passed it to-night on my way back to camp) is
+represented by a double line of tents, before each of which is a big
+field baking oven, its coal fire glowing from lower doors like huge, red
+eyes and its gaunt smoke-stack reaching upward to terminate in a cloud
+of black smoke which ascends higher and higher in long, graceful spirals
+until it is lost in the darkness of the night.
+
+Before these ovens work the bakers, in khaki, of course, but each
+swathed in a flowing white apron. With sleeves rolled up and shirts
+opened at the throat, they wield their long bakers' paddles, and as they
+pass to and fro in the dull red firelight, they look elfish and
+grotesque; exactly like a lot of gnome bakers off in the "nowheres"
+baking bread for some ferocious ogre who bids them work incessantly.
+
+And these loaves they bake are indeed loaves for ogres; huge affairs two
+feet long and as big 'round their rich brown girth as pumpkins. In
+"sheets" of a dozen each they are brought from the fire and placed
+steaming hot on a nearby table where an expert breaks them apart and
+tests the tenderness of their fibre and searches for signs of
+doughiness. These bakers are all of the Regular Army now, but not long
+since czars of dingy cellar bakeries located anywhere from Boston to San
+Francisco. But the ogre has called them together and here like gnomes
+they work, eight hours each in three shifts and the oven fires are kept
+burning always.
+
+Still we drill, drill, drill. This morning was spent in manoeuvring and
+tramping over the wet and soggy countryside in company formation, and
+this afternoon, by way of variety, we were given a few hours fatigue
+duty in the line of uprooting more stumps and gnarled tentacles, that
+seem to have rooted themselves in China. But our hands are hard and
+leathery now and our muscles no longer creak and pain under the stress.
+I've added four pounds to my former weight and I have never felt more
+fit in my life.
+
+[Illustration: They seemed to have rooted themselves in China]
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+The cost of high living here is enormous. The stoop-shouldered,
+shrewd-eyed, flinty-hearted Yankee clerks behind the broad counters of
+the "Post Exchange" disdain anything less than a quarter. Dimes and
+nickels are chicken-feed, and pennies--impossible. If a chap buys one
+apple at five cents or one pear or one banana (always green and a long
+way from being ripe) he has to hide himself in the crowd to escape the
+baleful eye of these grasping sharks. Five cent crackers sell two boxes
+for a quarter, penny candies are five cents each, cigars and cigarettes
+are considerably above normal in price and considerably below in
+quality, and ice cream sells for ten cents a gram.
+
+But none of us has grown up. We are all like big boys and we spend with
+no thought of to-morrow. Mess over, we all hie out to the two main roads
+that lead to the "Post Exchange," jingling coins in our trouser pockets.
+The "Exchange" itself is a long, low unpainted building like all other
+buildings here with tiny back country windows, half-obscured by garments
+hanging within which leave only a few dirty squares for the dull yellow
+light to show through.
+
+The doors are broad and through them streams a never ending line of
+troopers, some coming, some going. Inside, the place resembles nothing
+more than a huge up-country general store with shelves upon shelves
+stacked high with cracker boxes, shoe boxes, hardware and goodness only
+knows what not, while from the rafters hang heavy coats, sweaters,
+lanterns, huge stalks of green bananas, hams, bacon, boots and a lot of
+useless things that only gullible soldiers who feel a yearning to spend
+their money really purchase. But this spending of money somehow seems to
+bring us closer to civilization for the moment and we join the churning
+mass of men within, whose hobnailed shoes produce a great pounding and
+scraping sound and whose voices are raised in a constant babble of
+conversation which only the sharp ting, ting of the cash register bells
+can punctuate.
+
+We mill around with the crowd, and soon are pushed against a counter.
+Something attracts our eye. We feel a desire to possess it. We buy it,
+and start milling about the room again until presently we are near the
+door. Then we step out into the night again and join one of the groups
+of loiterers or sit about on boxes and piles of lumber, where we devour
+our purchase, if it happens to be in the line of crackers (which is
+usually the case), or admire it, if it happens to be a pocket flash
+lamp, a fountain pen or something else that we really never have had any
+use for.
+
+The small-town idea prevails even in the city of thirty thousand
+lonesome men. The "Post Exchange" and the "Post Office" are the two
+centres of interest. First we wander to one, and then we wander to the
+other, then with time on our hands we join the stream of men going up
+one side of the road "just walkin'" and when we reach the point where
+most of the crowd turns back, we turn back, too, and continue our
+"walkin'," with no particular place to go, until the streets begin to
+get deserted and it is time for the town to close up. Then we disappear,
+too, and for an hour occupy ourselves in the barracks until taps are
+sounded and lights are out, when we go to bed; the place I'm headed for
+now, so soon as I put the top on my fountain pen.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+[Illustration: Sick Call]
+
+That's the call that brings out all the shirkers. They line up in the
+morning and present all sorts of ailments from sore throat to heart
+disease.
+
+The line is especially long on mornings when they know we are in for two
+hours of "settin'-ups" or when some especially hard detail such as camp
+orderly or kitchen police has been handed out. A day in the hospital
+will relieve one of all these duties. This morning I was on the long
+line. But I hasten to explain that _I_ was sick (that's what they all
+say, of course,) with chills and a scrapy feeling in my throat; and
+since we are forbidden to take any medicine of our own, I shame-facedly
+line up with the rest of them. There were about twenty all told and the
+doctor made short work of us.
+
+"What's the matter with you?" very cross.
+
+"I-I-I-here--it hurts," said one, pointing to his back and looking quite
+scared. The M. D. poked his finger into the spot designated.
+
+"Man you're not sick," said the doctor in a very startling manner,
+"you're almost dead, only you won't lie down. You've dislocated a couple
+of vertibraes, ruptured a half-dozen ligaments and like as not you have
+a chronic case of pneumonia. The only thing that I can recommend for you
+is two hours of strenuous exercise. You may pull through and you may
+not." Then, with a malicious grin, he turned to the next man and the
+first invalid shuffled off, mumbling something about horse doctors
+without any horse sense.
+
+Two out of twenty of us got by. The rest went to work. I was one of the
+two. I had a slight temperature and an inflamed throat. Nothing serious,
+but report to the hospital. I did. And the best thing about the hospital
+was the fact that there were two sheets on the bed and I had an
+abbreviated flannel nightshirt to sleep in. Three big pills, the size of
+bullets and just as deadly, and then I turned in, went to sleep and
+slept right through mess time.
+
+Four o'clock I was feeling very much better and ravenously hungry and at
+five o'clock I was discharged as cured. I don't know what I was cured
+of, but I'm feeling much spryer just now after three helpings of beef
+stew and apple marmalade and I'm ready to turn in and sleep some more.
+
+
+
+
+Thursday:
+
+
+If there is one thing that I want to remember more than anything else
+about this Conscript Camp it is the spectacle I witnessed and took part
+in this evening.
+
+Fancy if you can Tower Hill with its big headquarters building snuggled
+in among the scattered and gaunt pines, the tall, ungainly water-tank
+propped up on all too spindly-looking stilts. On top of this a single
+figure thrown in bold relief by the golden yellow light of a big
+watch-fire, beating time with his baton, and below him, clothing the
+slopes of the hill five thousand men, his chorus, thundering forth
+across the starlit night "Columbia the Gem of the Ocean." That chorus
+was wonderful; that crowd was wonderful; everything about it was
+wonderful.
+
+We were all singing; thousands of fellows in khaki, some snuggled in
+their big army overcoats, some puffed out like pouter pigeons with the
+sweaters they had piled on under their tunics against the cold chill of
+night. Intermingled were the lumber jacks and labourers from the
+civilian camp, most of them in gay mackinaws and caps; with now and then
+an officer immaculately clad in clean cut uniform, or a Y. M. C. A. man
+in grey-green suit with red circle and triangle gleaming in the
+firelight. And how well they could sing; I have never heard a more
+stirring chorus and as we raised our voices loud and clear shivery
+thrills raced up and down our spines, and we were stirred to the highest
+pitch of patriotic fervor. Indeed, there were some among us who could
+find no better way of expressing the emotion that swelled within save by
+tears. They cried. I was one of them.
+
+"America" and "Dixie" and "Maryland" followed and every one produced its
+own thrill and its own heartache. Never was there anything more
+stirring, Never was there anything finer. We sang till our voices were
+husky and the great chorus surged loud and clear across the night, until
+it must have echoed against the crags of the Rhine and caused the Hun to
+shudder.
+
+Then the breaking up of the big meeting, when groups detached themselves
+and wandered out of the fitful flicker of the dying firelight into the
+misty blue blackness of the night, still singing. Out through the
+streets of the camp we tramped, stepping to the cadence of our own
+songs. We were all happy, very, very happy and draft or no draft, down
+in our hearts we all knew that we were in the very place we were meant
+to be, and we were doing the very things that we should do, and that
+when the time came we would do other and greater things with as much
+eagerness and enthusiasm as we had sung up there on Tower Hill to-night.
+
+The whole camp was singing even after the concert, but the character of
+the songs changed. "Over There" swelled forth everywhere and "The
+Yankees Are Coming" was chanted in every street. Out toward our own
+barracks our little group swung, passing the railroad siding where,
+partly shrouded in the canvas jackets, new artillery pieces were waiting
+to be moved in the morning. A cheer for these and a cheer for everything
+and anything that suggested patriotism, and on we tramped, brimming over
+with enthusiasm.
+
+And now I'm back to the barracks again, but the mysteries of the night
+and the spell of the whole wonderful occasion is still over me and I
+know I shall lie awake a long, long time and think and dream of all that
+waits for me in the not very distant future. And the promises I made
+myself up there on Tower Hill will all be fulfilled, that's certain.
+
+
+
+
+Friday:
+
+
+Momentous news. We of the headquarters company, or rather eighty-seven
+of us, start Monday on the first leg of that longed-for journey to
+France. We go to a Southern training camp where new units are being
+formed into which each of us will fit. And along with this news came the
+announcement that none of us will be given a pass to go home for a last
+good-bye. This has stirred the men more than the news of the transfer
+South. Several impromptu indignation meetings were held this morning and
+this afternoon, just after mess, a real demonstration took place in the
+mess hall and most of the eighty-seven of us were loud in our assertions
+that we would go home anyway, even though we were arrested for desertion
+afterward.
+
+This little incident served to impress upon me more than anything else
+the freedom that is accorded the men of this new American Army, for
+behold, before the meeting broke up a Lieutenant came in and addressed
+us on the penalties for desertion, the difficulty of dealing with
+headstrong soldiers and similar subjects, and then when we all felt and
+looked like slackers he announced that although orders had gone forth
+that no passes were to be granted, our commanding officer, knowing our
+feeling in the matter, was at that time trying very hard to arrange to
+secure permission for the men to go home over Saturday night and Sunday.
+As I left the mess hall I wondered vaguely how such a mass meeting would
+have been treated in the German Army, for instance, and I thanked my
+lucky stars that I was an American.
+
+But there are a thousand and one things remaining to be accomplished
+to-day. I have been hurrying from one place to another since reveille
+and now at taps all that I should do is not done yet. But to-morrow is
+another day.
+
+First of all we were rushed off to receive our third and fourth
+inoculations together. Then came the announcement that we would be
+relieved of all our winter clothing and given a complete summer outfit
+instead, for it appears there is no need for woollens in this Southland
+camp to which we are going.
+
+And between times, there were a score of personal things I wanted to do,
+not the least of which was to join the line of waiting men before the
+telephone booths in the Y. M. C. A. shacks to tell them at home the news
+of our going. In all this, poor Fat seems to be sadly left out, for he
+is not among the fellows who are to leave. He stands helplessly by and
+watches the hurry and bustle going on about him, and sometimes I think
+there is a sad, wistful sort of a look in his big, good-natured face,
+for I know he doesn't like the idea of staying here when the snow begins
+to fall and winds whistle disconsolately around the corners of the
+barracks building. I am glad that _I_ will not have to spend the winter
+here and I'm sorry, too, that Fat is not to be with me.
+
+
+
+
+Saturday:
+
+
+[Illustration: A soldier-boy in his native haunts]
+
+To-day, for the first time since I have been here, I had visitors. Those
+at home, eager to get a glimpse of their soldier-boy in his native
+haunts, came down to see things as they are. I'm quite certain that the
+general arrangement of the barracks, with its cluttered appearance
+suggested by many pairs of shoes standing around and many hats and coats
+and old sweaters hanging about, did not accord with mother's ideas of
+good housekeeping. And she assured me that many of the old rose, pink
+and baby blue comforters would not have suffered from a washing, all of
+which I had never noticed before, until she drew my attention to it. She
+intimated, too, that my dish towel and my hand towel would never testify
+as to my respectable up-bringing, and she felt that I should make a
+practice of taking off those abominably heavy trench shoes in the
+evening and putting on a pair of slippers which she would send down to
+me. She thought that a bath-robe might come in handy for lounging in the
+evening and perhaps after we got comfortably settled in our Southern
+quarters, she might send one of the big, roomy library chairs down to
+me, for she did not approve of one's sitting on one's bed the way most
+of us did. She deplored the total lack of chairs about the barracks and
+she was quite sure that taking an ice cold shower out in that horrible
+big tin building would certainly result in innumerable cases of
+influenza, if nothing more serious. She's a dear old mother and I don't
+know that I have ever appreciated her so much as I have since I've been
+down here.
+
+Then with my visitors caring for themselves for a while, and mother
+chumming up with the always affable Fat, whom she took quite a fancy to,
+I hurried about my work of being re-outfitted with summer uniforms.
+Fortunately they allowed me to retain my overcoat (which I received but
+a few days ago) until we are ready to entrain.
+
+Then came the passes. The officer was successful and we who are to go
+South are given a release from duty until to-morrow night at retreat.
+Other passes were distributed, too, and Fat fortunate for once, yet
+unfortunate, got one to go home until Monday morning. But poor Fat!
+Still the military tailors lag and now that he has the pass that he has
+been trying to get for this last month, he cannot use it, for he is not
+properly uniformed to leave the cantonment, having still just his
+flannel shirt. He tried frantically to borrow parts of a uniform to fit
+him and while he could find a pair of breeches that he could get into, a
+jacket was lacking, so in disgust, and with a most unhappy smile, he
+gave it up and went over to the Y.M. telephone booth to ask his mother
+to come down and visit him over Sunday.
+
+And to-night there are no taps for me, for I am home once more and
+writing this at my own desk. We all came home together and had a bully
+trip and now, after the best dinner I have eaten in many a day, I shall
+see a real show at a real theatre, and sit up as late as I choose and
+when I go to bed I will be between clean sheets again and there will be
+no officers' whistles to wake me in the morning.
+
+
+
+
+Sunday:
+
+
+Back again, but back to a sad and very unhappy barracks. Fat, poor, poor
+Fat, who felt downcast because he was not going South, has gone on a far
+longer journey. It is the first tragedy that has come into our life here
+in our barracks and with the thoughts of the breaking up of the big
+family on the morrow, and the homesickness, that most of us feel because
+of our all too brief trips home, has cast a gloom over us all.
+
+Unfortunate Fat, done out of using his pass by the slowness of the army
+tailors, telephoned home yesterday to have his mother come out to see
+him. At train time this morning he was at the terminal awaiting her
+arrival. But in the shifting of the cars back and forth in the yard an
+accident happened and Fat, in the way of it, was one of its victims.
+Both his legs were crushed and he was hurried away to the hospital.
+
+Meanwhile, his grey-haired old mother arrived and stood about the
+terminal hour after hour wondering why he did not come for her, and it
+was not until late this afternoon that one of the boys in our company
+thought to go down and try and find her; which, fortunately, was not too
+late to bid her son good-bye.
+
+And now we are on the eve of our departure. As I came through the
+terminal an hour ago the troop train, a long line of nondescript
+coaches, was being made up. As each car was made ready it was shunted
+into line by the ever-grumbling engine and to-morrow at daybreak all
+will be ready for us. Then we will go and some of us will be sorry, and
+some of us will be glad. As for myself, all that I can say is "Adieu,
+camp," and if the place I am bound for, wherever it may be, holds the
+charms that I've found here, I'll be happy.
+
+
+
+
+Monday:
+
+
+The mere suggestion of troop movements has a thrill to it, and we have
+had a lot of thrills to-day.
+
+[Illustration: I was alone in line]
+
+After a long period of restless waiting, and good-byes to every one and
+everything about the old barracks, came the command to fall in. Then in
+summer uniforms, and each with a big blue barracks bag crowded with
+personal belongings, extra uniform, shoes, blanket and what not, on our
+shoulders, we lined up, shouted last farewells and stepped off, down the
+barracks street and out toward the railroad station. There was no
+whistling nor singing for we were all very solemn, and I was lonesome,
+for I was alone in line, the only member of our entire squad to go.
+
+We came upon other columns of fellows, coming from other companies,
+bound with us for this Southern camp. On we marched to the terminal.
+Here confusion reigned for a while, for hundreds of men in khaki were
+scattered everywhere, all bending under blue duffel bags, and wondering
+what was to happen next.
+
+But soon we were entrained, and then with locomotive whistles hooting,
+and heads bobbing from every car window, we said farewell to The Camp.
+And with the leave-taking our spirits seemed to rise, for there was
+singing and whistling and horse play once more as the big cantonment
+faded from view behind its fringe of pine woods.
+
+Our first impression was that we would travel all the way to Georgia in
+the cars we had been assigned to, but, fortunately, this was not true,
+for after a long and tedious trip we detrained again at a ferry terminal
+in Brooklyn. Here, too, was confusion. It was late in the afternoon, and
+we were hungry. Every candy stand, and handy store was patronized until
+the officers interfered. Then came the big, old fashioned side-wheeled
+ferries, and we were hustled aboard.
+
+Soon the old craft swung out into the river and with churning paddles we
+headed down stream.
+
+It was just sunset. Far down the bay, beyond Governor's Island and
+Liberty, a great, fiery red disc was setting in a haze of smoke and mist
+from the city, while to our right and left on the river banks, lights
+began to twinkle, and overhead strings of diamonds draped each
+gracefully arching bridge. Past the Navy Yard we swung, with cheers from
+the crews of three destroyers in the river. Tugs and steamers and
+passing sound night boats greeted us with whistles, and we lined the
+rails and cheered back.
+
+Soon we churned under the last of the bridges and began to make our
+tortoise-like way around the Battery. Lights were glimmering through the
+violet haze that shrouded the mass of sky-touching buildings, and in the
+foreground were hurrying throngs of men and women wending their way
+through Battery Park toward the ferries.
+
+Up the North River, the skyline of the huge cities changed and grew more
+impressive, as one building after another came out of the mass and stood
+alone against the blue-black Eastern night sky. Ferries criss-crossing
+in the darkness, leaving sparkling trails of light that danced on the
+water, crowded close to us at times, and the mass of men and women
+huddled on the windswept decks, cheered us on our way. Thus did we say
+our last good-bye to the big city--and we said it solemnly and
+thoughtfully, too, for many of us know that we are going on the long,
+long journey and will never see that skyline again.
+
+The crowds in the terminal, as we hurried from ferry to the railroad
+yard, cheered us, too, and men rushed out to shake hands with us and
+crowded cigarettes and cigars into our pockets as we marched on.
+
+We had been told that the Red Cross would feed us. It did, to the extent
+of a single sandwich and a cup of coffee, hastily snatched as we wended
+our way through the railroad yard to the train.
+
+Long tourist sleepers are our lot. They stood on a siding, dimly lighted
+with a single candle at either end of the car when we climbed into them
+and were assigned to our seats. We are settled now, and rolling swiftly
+across Jersey. Lights have been turned on, and the interior of the car
+looks very strange with the big blue duffel bags swinging from every
+hook and swaying as the train rounds each curve. But we are all very
+quiet, and many of us are thinking. We are all homesick that is certain,
+and hungry, too, and wondering about the future.
+
+
+
+
+Tuesday:
+
+
+We are rolling through Virginia into the sunset.
+
+For twenty hours we have been crowded into these cars, and we are
+cramped and tired, but feeling happier with all. Two to a berth, we
+tried to sleep last night. But sleep was impossible. I was up most of
+the night, standing at the upper end of the car looking out the window,
+while my new-found bunkie tried hard to get in a few winks. He wasn't
+successful.
+
+At midnight we ran through a little station called Brandy, and there in
+a pounding rainstorm, under the light of a smoky, yellow oil lamp, stood
+a solitary soldierly-looking figure, a boy, bare-footed and with head
+uncovered and his rain-soaked cap held over his heart in a salute. He
+alone had been watching for the troop train.
+
+Sometime after daylight, at Charlottesville, our train stopped for
+water. All signs of the rain had cleared, hundreds of boys, black and
+white, and men and women swarmed to the station to greet us. Our
+canteens were passed out of the windows for water, and hot coffee and
+thick sandwiches of home-made bread and jelly and delicious ham were
+given to us by a committee of very old women who had been up since long
+before daylight awaiting our arrival. Rations were served to us after we
+pulled out of the station, consisting of bread and hard crackers, and a
+can of tomatoes and a can of beans for every six men.
+
+By way of diversion we began to play poker for the beans, and a pair of
+jacks left me breakfastless, except for the coffee and sandwich I was
+fortunate enough to get at Charlottesville. And that is all I have had
+since seven o'clock and it is now half-past four.
+
+At one station along the line, where we laid over for a few moments,
+several fellows, acting as Sergeants, were sent out to buy food for our
+company. But the train pulled out without them. Goodness knows where
+they are now, but the saddest part of it is that they didn't bring back
+the eats.
+
+
+
+
+Wednesday:
+
+
+We are travelling through a land of gold and red and green, with huge
+dabs of white marking the cotton fields. And we are hungry no longer.
+
+At Cornellia the train stopped for half an hour, and the fellows, all
+but famished, made a wild rush for the door, and sweeping aside such
+obstructions as angry Sergeants took the town by storm. About seven
+hundred soldiers descended upon it, and bought everything in the eating
+line that they could possibly find, even to whole cheeses, huge stalks
+of bananas, and cases of honey. We ate, and we flooded the town with
+money. Never has Cornellia seen such a busy half-hour in its history,
+and never did the stores do such a tremendous business.
+
+We held up the troop train while we satisfied our appetites. But what of
+it! We are happy now, with tight belts and plenty of cigarettes to
+smoke, so why worry!
+
+Never in my life have I seen so many negroes. They swarm about the train
+at every stop we make, chalk their initials on the cars (as every one
+else has done) sing songs, cheer and just bubble over with enthusiasm.
+Last night, while our train was on a siding, an old fellow somehow got
+inside the car and did a wild buck and wing dance in the aisle for
+pennies that were tossed from every bunk. And this morning another old
+fellow, with a bag of cotton on his back, came a little too close to the
+windows of the troop train. Eager hands seized the bag and pulled it
+from his shoulders, and presently the cotton was being distributed among
+the men as souvenirs.
+
+And now we are only twenty miles from Atlanta, and the fellows are
+beginning to pack up their belongings. Some are trying hard to shave in
+a crowded wash-room, for the long train ride has left us all appearing a
+little the worse for wear and we want to enter our new home as
+presentable as possible.
+
+I wonder what this new home will be like? Camp X is the cantonment and I
+am told that it is bigger than the place we left, but if it is half as
+pleasant we will be satisfied.
+
+ THE END
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Conscript 2989, by Irving Crump
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