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FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.08.01*END** +[Portions of this header are copyright (C) 2001 by Michael S. Hart +and may be reprinted only when these Etexts are free of all fees.] +[Project Gutenberg is a TradeMark and may not be used in any sales +of Project Gutenberg Etexts or other materials be they hardware or +software or any other related product without express permission.] + + + + + +This etext was produced by David Price, email ccx074@coventry.ac.uk, +from the 1887 Cassell & Company edition. + + + + + +THE HUNCHBACK + +by James Sheridan Knowles + + + + +INTRODUCTION + + + +James Sheridan Knowles was born at Cork in 1784, and died at Torquay +in December, 1862, at the age of 78. His father was a teacher of +elocution, who compiled a dictionary, and who was related to the +Sheridans. He moved to London when his son was eight years old, and +there became acquainted with William Hazlitt and Charles Lamb. The +son, after his school education, obtained a commission in the army, +but gave up everything for the stage, and made his first appearance +at the Crow Street Theatre, in Dublin. He did not become a great +actor, and when he took to writing plays he did not prove himself a +great poet, but his skill in contriving situations through which a +good actor can make his powers tell upon the public, won the heart +of the great actor of his day, and as Macready's own poet he rose to +fame. + +Before Macready had discovered him, Sheridan Knowles lived partly by +teaching elocution at Belfast and Glasgow, partly by practice of +elocution as an actor. In 1815 he produced at the Belfast Theatre +his first play, Caius Gracchus. His next play, Virginius was +produced at Glasgow with great success. Macready, who had, at the +age of seventeen, begun his career as an actor at his father's +theatre in Birmingham, had, on Monday, October 5th, 1819, at the age +of twenty-six, taken the Londoners by storm in the character of +Richard III Covent Garden reopened its closed treasury. It was +promptly followed by a success in Coriolanus, and Macready's place +was made. He was at once offered fifty pounds a night for appearing +on one evening a week at Brighton. It was just after that turn in +Macready's fortunes that a friend at Glasgow recommended to him the +part of Virginius in Sheridan Knowles's play lately produced there. +He agreed unwillingly to look at it, and says that in April, 1820, +the parcel containing the MS. came as he was going out. He +hesitated, then sat down to read it that he might get a wearisome +job over. As he read, he says, "The freshness and simplicity of the +dialogue fixed my attention; I read on and on, and was soon absorbed +in the interest of the story and the passion of its scenes, till at +its close I found myself in such a state of excitement that for a +time I was undecided what step to take. Impulse was in the +ascendant, and snatching up my pen I hurriedly wrote, as my agitated +feelings prompted, a letter to the author, to me then a perfect +stranger." Bryan Procter (Barry Cornwall) read the play next day +with Macready, and confirmed him in his admiration of it. + +Macready at once got it accepted at the theatre, where nothing was +spent on scenery, but there was a good cast, and the enthusiasm of +Macready as stage manager for the occasion half affronted some of +his seniors. On the 17th of May, 1820, about a month after it came +into Macready's hands, Virginius was produced at Covent Garden, +where, says the actor in his "Reminiscences," "the curtain fell +amidst the most deafening applause of a highly-excited auditory." +Sheridan Knowles's fame, therefore, was made, like that of his +friend Macready, and the friendship between author and actor +continued. Sheridan Knowles had a kindly simplicity of character, +and the two qualities for which an actor most prizes a dramatist, +skill in providing opportunities for acting that will tell, and +readiness to make any changes that the actor asks for. The +postscript to his first letter to Macready was, "Make any +alterations you like in any part of the play, and I shall be obliged +to you." When he brought to the great actor his play of William +Tell--Caius Gracchus had been produced in November, 1823--there were +passages of writing in it that stopped the course of action, and, +says Macready, "Knowles had less of the tenacity of authorship than +most writers," so that there was no difficulty about alterations, +Macready having in a very high degree the tenacity of actorship. +And so, in 1825, Tell became another of Macready's best successes. + +Sheridan Knowles continued to write for the stage until 1845, when +he was drawn wholly from the theatre by a religious enthusiasm that +caused him, in 1851, to essay the breaking of a lance with Cardinal +Wiseman on the subject of Transubstantiation. Sir Robert Peel gave +ease to his latter days by a pension of 200 pounds a year from the +Civil List, which he had honourably earned by a career as dramatist, +in which he sought to appeal only to the higher sense of literature, +and to draw enjoyment from the purest source. Of his plays time two +comedies {1} here given are all that have kept their place upon the +stage. As one of the most earnest dramatic writers of the present +century he is entitled to a little corner in our memory. Worse work +of the past has lasted longer than the plays of Sheridan Knowles are +likely to last through the future. + +H. M. + + + +THE HUNCHBACK. + + + +DRAMATIS PERSONAE. +(AS ORIGINALLY PERFORMED AT COVENT GARDEN IN 1832.) + + + +Julia Miss F. KEMBLE. +Helen Miss TAYLOR. +Master Walter Mr. J. S. KNOWLES. +Sir Thomas Clifford Mr. C. KEMBLE. +Lord Tinsel Mr. WRENCH. +Master Wilford Mr. J. MASON. +Modus Mr. ABBOTT. +Master Heartwell Mr. EVANS. +Gaylove Mr. HENRY. +Fathom Mr. MEADOWS. +Thomas Mr. BARNES. +Stephen Mr. PAYNE. +Williams Mr. IRWIN. +Simpson Mr. BRADY. +Waiter Mr. HEATH. +Holdwell Mr. BENDER. + { Mr. J. COOPER. +Servants { Mr. LOLLETT. + + + +ACT I. + + + +SCENE I.--A Tavern. + + +On one side SIR THOMAS CLIFFORD, at a table, with wine before him; +on the other, MASTER WILFORD, GAYLOVE, HOLDWELL, and SIMPSON, +likewise taking wine. + +Wilf. Your wine, sirs! your wine! You do not justice to mine host +of the Three Tuns, nor credit to yourselves; I swear the beverage is +good! It is as palatable poison as you will purchase within a mile +round Ludgate! Drink, gentlemen; make free. You know I am a man of +expectations; and hold my money as light as the purse in which I +carry it. + +Gay. We drink, Master Wilford. Not a man of us has been chased as +yet. + +Wilf. But you fill not fairly, sirs! Look at my measure! +Wherefore a large glass, if not for a large draught? Fill, I pray +you, else let us drink out of thimbles! This will never do for the +friends of the nearest of kin to the wealthiest peer in Britain. + +Gay. We give you joy, Master Wilford, of the prospect of +advancement which has so unexpectedly opened to you. + +Wilf. Unexpectedly indeed! But yesterday arrived the news that the +Earl's only son and heir had died; and to-day has the Earl himself +been seized with a mortal illness. His dissolution is looked for +hourly; and I, his cousin in only the third degree, known to him but +to be unnoticed by him--a decayed gentleman's son--glad of the title +and revenues of a scrivener's clerk--am the undoubted successor to +his estates and coronet. + +Gay. Have you been sent for? + +Wilf. No; but I have certified to his agent, Master Walter, the +Hunchback, my existence, and peculiar propinquity; and momentarily +expect him here. + +Gay. Lives there anyone that may dispute your claim--I mean +vexatiously? + +Wilf. Not a man, Master Gaylove. I am the sole remaining branch of +the family tree. + +Gay. Doubtless you look for much happiness from this change of +fortune? + +Wilf. A world! Three things have I an especial passion for. The +finest hound, the finest horse, and the finest wife in the kingdom, +Master Gaylove! + +Gay. The finest wife? + +Wilf. Yes, sir; I marry. Once the earldom comes into my line, I +shall take measures to perpetuate its remaining there. I marry, +sir! I do not say that I shall love. My heart has changed +mistresses too often to settle down in one servitude now, sir. But +fill, I pray you, friends. This, if I mistake not, is the day +whence I shall date my new fortunes; and, for that reason, hither +have I invited you, that, having been so long my boon companions, +you shall be the first to congratulate me. + +[Enter Waiter] + +Waiter. You are wanted, Master Wilford. + +Wilf. By whom? + +Waiter. One Master Walter. + +Wilf. His lordship's agent! News, sirs! Show him in! + +[Waiter goes out] + +My heart's a prophet, sirs--The Earl is dead. + +[Enter MASTER WALTER] + +Well, Master Walter. How accost you me? + +Wal. As your impatience shows me you would have me. +My Lord, the Earl of Rochdale! + +Gay. Give you joy! + +Hold. All happiness, my lord! + +Simp. Long life and health unto your lordship! + +Gay. Come! +We'll drink to his lordship's health! 'Tis two o'clock, +We'll e'en carouse till midnight! Health, my lord! + +Hold. My lord, much joy to you! + +Simp. All good to your lordship! + +Wal. Give something to the dead! + +Gay. Give what? + +Wal. Respect! +He has made the living! First to him that's gone, +Say "Peace!"--and then with decency to revels! + +Gay. What means the knave by revels? + +Wal. Knave? + +Gay. Ay, knave! + +Wal. Go to! Thou'rt flushed with wine! + +Gay. Thou sayest false! +Though didst thou need a proof thou speakest true, +I'd give thee one. Thou seest but one lord here, +And I see two! + +Wal. Reflect'st thou on my shape? +Thou art a villain! + +Gay. [Starting up.] Ha! + +Wal. A coward, too! +Draw! + +[Drawing his sword.] + +Gay. Only mark him! how he struts about! +How laughs his straight sword at his noble back. + +Wal. Does it? It cuffs thee for a liar then! + +[Strikes GAYLOVE with his sword.] + +Gay. A blow! + +Wal. Another, lest you doubt the first! + +Gay. His blood on his own head! I'm for you, sir! + +[Draws.] + +Clif. Hold, sir! This quarrel's mine! + +[Coming forward and drawing.] + +Wal. No man shall fight for me, sir! + +Clif. By your leave, +Your patience, pray! My lord, for so I learn +Behoves me to accost you--for your own sake +Draw off your friend! + +Wal. Not till we have a bout, sir! + +Clif. My lord, your happy fortune ill you greet! +Ill greet it those who love you--greeting thus +The herald of it! + +Wal. Sir, what's that to you? +Let go my sleeve! + +Clif. My lord, if blood be shed +On the fair dawn of your prosperity, +Look not to see the brightness of its day. +'Twill be o'ercast throughout! + +Gay. My lord, I'm struck! + +Clif. You gave the first blow, and the hardest one! +Look, sir; if swords you needs must measure, I'm +Your mate, not he! + +Wal. I'm mate for any man! + +Clif. Draw off your friend, my lord, for your own sake! + +Wilf. Come, Gaylove! let's have another room. + +Gay. With all my heart, since 'tis your lordship's will. + +Wilf. That's right! Put up! Come, friends! + +[WILFORD and Friends go out.] + +Wal. I'll follow him! +Why do you hold me? 'Tis not courteous of you! +Think'st thou I fear them? Fear! I rate them but +As dust! dross! offals! Let me at them!--Nay, +Call you this kind? then kindness know I not; +Nor do I thank you for't! Let go, I say! + +Clif. Nay, Master Walter, they're not worth your wrath. + +Wal. How know you me for Master Walter? By +My hunchback, eh!--my stilts of legs and arms, +The fashion more of ape's than man's? Aha! +So you have heard them, too--their savage gibes +As I pass on,--"There goes my lord!" aha! +God made me, sir, as well as them and you. +'Sdeath! I demand of you, unhand me, sir! + +Clif. There, sir, you're free to follow them! Go forth, +And I'll go too: so on your wilfulness +Shall fall whate'er of evil may ensue. +Is't fit you waste your choler on a burr? +The nothings of the town; whose sport it is +To break their villain jests on worthy men, +The graver still the fitter! Fie for shame! +Regard what such would say? So would not I, +No more than heed a cur. + +Wal. You're right, sir; right, +For twenty crowns! So there's my rapier up! +You've done me a good turn against my will; +Which, like a wayward child, whose pet is off, +That made him restive under wholesome check, +I now right humbly own, and thank you for. + +Clif. No thanks, good Master Walter, owe you me! +I'm glad to know you, sir. + +Wal. I pray you, now, +How did you learn my name? Guessed I not right? +Was't not my comely hunch that taught it you? + +Clif. I own it. + +Wal. Right, I know it; you tell truth. I like you for't. + +Clif. But when I heard it said +That Master Walter was a worthy man, +Whose word would pass on 'change soon as his bond; +A liberal man--for schemes of public good +That sets down tens, where others units write; +A charitable man--the good he does, +That's told of, not the half; I never more +Could see the hunch on Master Walter's back! + +Wal. You would not flatter a poor citizen? + +Clif. Indeed, I flatter not! + +Wal. I like your face - +A frank and honest one! Your frame's well knit, +Proportioned, shaped! + +Clif. Good sir! + +Wal. Your name is Clifford - +Sir Thomas Clifford. Humph! You're not the heir +Direct to the fair baronetcy? He +That was, was drowned abroad. Am I not right? +Your cousin, was't not?--so succeeded you +To rank and wealth, your birth ne'er promised you. + +Clif. I see you know my history. + +Wal. I do. +You're lucky who conjoin the benefits +Of penury and abundance; for I know +Your father was a man of slender means. +You do not blush, I see. That's right! Why should you? +What merit to be dropped on fortune's hill? +The honour is to mount it. You'd have done it; +For you were trained to knowledge, industry, +Frugality, and honesty,--the sinews +That surest help the climber to the top, +And keep him there. I have a clerk, Sir Thomas, +Once served your father; there's the riddle for you. +Humph! I may thank you for my life to-day. + +Clif. I pray you say not so. + +Wal. But I will say so! +Because I think so, know so, feel so, sir! +Your fortune, I have heard, I think, is ample! +And doubtless you live up to't? + +Clif. 'Twas my rule, +And is so still, to keep my outlay, sir, +A span within my means. + +Wal. A prudent rule! +The turf is a seductive pastime! + +Clif. Yes. + +Wal. You keep a racing stud? You bet? + +Clif. No, neither. +'Twas still my father's precept--"Better owe +A yard of land to labour, than to chance +Be debtor for a rood!" + +Wal. 'Twas a wise precept. +You've a fair house--you'll get a mistress for it? + +Clif. In time! + +Wal. In time! 'Tis time thy choice were made. +Is't not so yet? Or is thy lady love +The newest still thou seest? + +Clif. Nay, not so. +I'd marry, Master Walter, but old use - +For since the age of thirteen I have lived +In the world--has made me jealous of the thing +That flattered me with hope of profit. Bargains +Another would snap up, might be for me: +Till I had turned and turned them! Speculations, +That promised, twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, +Ay, cent-per-cent. returns, I would not launch in, +When others were afloat, and out at sea; +Whereby I made small gains, but missed great losses. +As ever, then, I looked before I leaped, +So do I now. + +Wal. Thou'rt all the better for it! +Let's see! Hand free--heart whole--well-favoured--so! +Rich, titled! Let that pass!--kind, valiant, prudent - +Sir Thomas, I can help thee to a wife, +Hast thou the luck to win her! + +Clif. Master Walter! +You jest! + +Wal. I do not jest. I like you! mark - +I like you, and I like not everyone! +I say a wife, sir, can I help you to, +The pearly texture of whose dainty skin +Alone were worth thy baronetcy! Form +And feature has she, wherein move and glow +The charms, that in the marble, cold and still, +Culled by the sculptor's jealous skill and joined there, +Inspire us! Sir, a maid, before whose feet, +A duke--a duke might lay his coronet, +To lift her to his state, and partner her! +A fresh heart too!--a young fresh heart, sir; one +That Cupid has not toyed with, and a warm one - +Fresh, young, and warm! mark that! a mind to boot; +Wit, sir; sense, taste;--a garden strictly tended - +Where nought but what is costly flourishes! +A consort for a king, sir! Thou shalt see her! + +Clif. I thank you, Master Walter! As you speak, +Methinks I see me at the altar-foot! +Her hand fast locked in mine!--the ring put on! +My wedding-bell rings merry in my ear; +And round me throng glad tongues that give me joy +To be the bridegroom of so fair a bride! + +Wal. What! sparks so thick? We'll have a blaze anon! + +Servant. [Entering.] The chariot's at the door. + +Wal. It waits in time! +Sir Thomas, it shall bear thee to the bower +Where dwells this fair--for she's no city belle, +But e'en a sylvan goddess! + +Clif. Have with you! + +Wal. You'll bless the day you served the Hunchback, sir! + +[They go out.] + + +SCENE II.--A Garden before a Country House. + + +[Enter JULIA and HELEN.] + +Helen. I like not, Julia, this your country life. +I'm weary on't! + +Julia. Indeed? So am not I! +I know no other; would no other know! + +Helen. You would no other know! Would you not know +Another relative?--another friend - +Another house--another anything, +Because the ones you have already please you? +That's poor content! Would you not be more rich, +More wise, more fair? The song that last you learned +You fancy well; and therefore shall you learn +No other song? Your virginal, 'tis true, +Hath a sweet tone; but does it follow thence, +You shall not have another virginal? +You may, love, and a sweeter one; and so +A sweeter life may find than this you lead! + +Julia. I seek it not. Helen, I'm constancy! + +Helen. So is a cat, a dog, a silly hen, +An owl, a bat,--where they are wont to lodge +That still sojourn, nor care to shift their quarters. +Thou'rt constancy? I am glad I know thy name! +The spider comes of the same family, +That in his meshy fortress spends his life, +Unless you pull it down and scare him from it. +And so thou'rt constancy? Ar't proud of that? +I'll warrant thee I'll match thee with a snail +From year to year that never leaves his house! +Such constancy forsooth!--a constant grub +That houses ever in the self-same nut +Where he was born, till hunger drives him out, +Or plunder breaketh through his castle wall! +And so, in very deed, thou'rt constancy! + +Julia. Helen, you know the adage of the tree; - +I've ta'en the bend. This rural life of mine, +Enjoined me by an unknown father's will, +I've led from infancy. Debarred from hope +Of change, I ne'er have sighed for change. The town +To me was like the moon, for any thought +I e'er should visit it--nor was I schooled +To think it half so fair! + +Helen. Not half so fair! +The town's the sun, and thou hast dwelt in night +E'er since thy birth, not to have seen the town! +Their women there are queens, and kings their men; +Their houses palaces! + +Julia. And what of that? +Have your town-palaces a hall like this? +Couches so fragrant? walls so high-adorned? +Casements with such festoons, such prospects, Helen, +As these fair vistas have? Your kings and queens! +See me a May-day queen, and talk of them! + +Helen. Extremes are ever neighbours. 'Tis a step +From one to the other! Were thy constancy +A reasonable thing--a little less +Of constancy--a woman's constancy - +I should not wonder wert thou ten years hence +The maid I know thee now; but, as it is, +The odds are ten to one, that this day year +Will see our May-day queen a city one! + +Julia. Never! I'm wedded to a country life: +O, did you hear what Master Walter says! +Nine times in ten the town's a hollow thing, +Where what things are is nought to what they show; +Where merit's name laughs merit's self to scorn! +Where friendship and esteem that ought to be +The tenants of men's hearts, lodge in their looks +And tongues alone. Where little virtue, with +A costly keeper, passes for a heap; +A heap for none that has a homely one! +Where fashion makes the law--your umpire which +You bow to, whether it has brains or not! +Where Folly taketh off his cap and bells, +To clap on Wisdom, which must bear the jest! +Where to pass current you must seem the thing, +The passive thing, that others think; and not +Your simple, honest, independent self! + +Helen. Ay: so says Master Walter. See I not +What can you find in Master Walter, Julia, +To be so fond of him! + +Julia. He's fond of me! +I've known him since I was a child. E'en then, +The week I thought a weary, heavy one, +That brought not Master Walter. I had those +About me then that made a fool of me, +As children oft are fooled; but more I loved +Good Master Walter's lesson than the play +With which they'd surfeit me. As I grew up, +More frequent Master Walter came, and more +I loved to see him! I had tutors then, +Men of great skill and learning--but not one +That taught like Master Walter. What they'd show me, +And I, dull as I was, but doubtful saw, - +A word from Master Walter made as clear +As daylight! When my schooling days were o'er - +That's now good three years past--three years--I vow +I'm twenty, Helen!--well, as I was saying, +When I had done with school, and all were gone, +Still Master Walter came! and still he comes, +Summer or winter--frost or rain! I've seen +The snow upon a level with the hedge, +Yet there was Master Walter! + +Helen. Who comes here? +A carriage, and a gay one--who alights? +Pshaw! Only Master Walter! What see you, +Which thus repairs the arch of the fair brow, +A frown was like to spoil?--A gentleman! +One of our town kings! Mark!--How say you now? +Wouldst be a town queen, Julia? Which of us, +I wonder, comes he for? + +Julia. For neither of us; +He's Master Walter's clerk, most like. + +Helen. Most like! +Mark him as he comes up the avenue; +So looks a clerk! A clerk has such a gait! +So does a clerk dress, Julia!--mind his hose - +They're very like a clerk's! a diamond loop +And button, note you, for his clerkship's hat, - +O, certainly a clerk! A velvet cloak, +Jerkin of silk, and doublet of the same, - +For all the world a clerk! See, Julia, see, +How Master Walter bows, and yields him place, +That he may first go in--a very clerk! +I'll learn of thee, love, when I'd know a clerk! + +Julia. I wonder who he is! + +Helen. Wouldst like to know? +Wouldst for a fancy ride to town with him? +I prophesy he comes to take thee thither! + +Julia. He ne'er takes me to town! No, Helen, no! +To town who will, a country life for me! + +Helen. We'll see! + +[Enter FATHOM.] + +Fath. You're wanted, madam. + +Julia. [Embarrassed.] Which of us? + +Fath. You, madam. + +Helen. Julia! what's the matter? Nay, +Mount not the rose so soon! He must not see it +A month hence. 'Tis loves flower, which once she wears, +The maid is all his own. + +Julia. Go to! + +Helen. Be sure +He comes to woo thee! He will bear thee hence; +He'll make thee change the country for the town. + +Julia. I'm constancy. Name he the town to me, +I'll tell what I think on't! + +Helen. Then you guess +He comes a wooing? + +Julia. I guess nought. + +Helen. You do! +At your grave words, your lips, more honest, smile, +And show them to be traitors. Hie to him. + +Julia. Hie thee to soberness. + +[Goes out.] + +Helen. Ay, will I, when, +Thy bridemaid, I shall hie to church with thee. +Well, Fathom, who is come? + +Fath. I know not. + +Helen. What! Didst thou not hear his name? + +Fath. I did. + +Helen. What is't? + +Fath. I noted not. + +Helen. What hast thou ears for, then? + +Fath. What good were it for me to mind his name? +I do but what I must do. To do that +Is labour quite enough! + +Wal. [Without.] What, Fathom! + +Fath. Here. + +Wal. [Entering.] Here, sirrah! Wherefore didst not come to me? + +Fath. You did not bid me come. + +Wal. I called thee. + +Fath. Yes. +And I said "Here;" and waited then to know +Your worship's will with me. + +Wal. We go to town. +Thy mistress, thou, and all the house. + +Fath. Well, sir? + +Wal. Mak'st thou not ready then to go to town? +Hence, knave, despatch! + +[FATHOM goes out.] + +Helen. Go we to town? + +Wal. We do; +'Tis now her father's will she sees the town. + +Helen. I'm glad on't. Goes she to her father? + +Wal. No: +At the desire of thine she for a term shares roof with thee. + +Helen. I'm very glad on't. + +Wal. What! +You like her, then? I thought you would. 'Tis time +She sees the town. + +Helen. It has been time for that +These six years. + +Wal. By thy wisdom's count. No doubt +You've told her what a precious place it is. + +Helen. I have. + +Wal. I even guessed as much. For that +I told thee of her; brought thee here to see her; +And prayed thee to sojourn a space with her; +That its fair space, from thy too fair report, +Might strike a novice less--so less deceive her. +I did not put thee under check. + +Helen. 'Twas right, - +Else had I broken loose, and run the wilder! +So knows she not her father yet: that's strange. +I prithee how does mine? + +Wal. Well--very well. +News for thee. + +Helen. What? + +Wal. Thy cousin is in town. + +Helen. My cousin Modus? + +Wal. Much do I suspect +That cousin's nearer to thy heart than blood. + +Helen. Pshaw! Wed me to a musty library! +Love him who nothing loves but Greek and Latin! +But, Master Walter, you forget the main +Surpassing point of all! Who's come with you? + +Wal. Ay, that's the question! + +Helen. Is he soldier or +Civilian? lord or gentleman? He's rich, +If that's his chariot! Where is his estate? +What brings it in? Six thousand pounds a year? +Twelve thousand, may be! Is he bachelor, +Or husband? Bachelor I'm sure he is +Comes he not hither wooing, Master Walter? +Nay, prithee, answer me! + +Wal. Who says thy sex +Are curious? That they're patient, I'll be sworn; +And reasonable--very reasonable - +To look for twenty answers in a breath! +Come, thou shalt be enlightened--but propound +Thy questions one by one! Thou'rt far too apt +A scholar! My ability to teach +Will ne'er keep pace, I fear, with thine to learn. + +[They go out.] + + +SCENE III.--An Apartment in the House. + + +[Enter JULIA, followed by CLIFFORD.] + +Julia. No more! I pray you, sir, no more! + +Clif. I love you! + +Julia. You mock me, sir! + +Clif. Then is there no such thing +On earth as reverence; honour filial, the fear +Of kings, the awe of supreme heaven itself, +Are only shows and sounds that stand for nothing. +I love you! + +Julia. You have known me scarce a minute! + +Clif. Say but a moment, still I say I love you! +Love's not a flower that grows on the dull earth; +Springs by the calendar; must wait for the sun - +For rain;--matures by parts;--must take its time +To stem, to leaf, to bud, to blow. It owns +A richer soil, and boasts a quicker seed! +You look for it, and see it not; and lo! +E'en while you look, the peerless flower is up. +Consummate in the birth! + +Julia. Is't fear I feel? +Why else should beat my heart? It can't be fear! +Something I needs must say. You're from the town; +How comes it, sir, you seek a country wife? +Methinks 'twill tax his wit to answer that. + +Clif. In joining contrasts lieth love's delight. +Complexion, stature, nature, mateth it, +Not with their kinds, but with their opposites. +Hence hands of snow in palms of russet lie; +The form of Hercules affects the sylph's; +And breasts, that case the lion's fear-proof heart, +Find their meet lodge in arms where tremors dwell! +Haply for this, on Afric's swarthy neck, +Hath Europe's priceless pearl been seen to hang, +That makes the orient poor! So with degrees, +Rank passes by the circlet-graced brow, +Upon the forehead, bare, of notelessness +To print the nuptial kiss. As with degrees +So is't with habits; therefore I, indeed +A gallant of the town, the town forsake, +To win a country wife. + +Julia. His prompt reply +My backward challenge shames! Must I give o'er? +I'll try his wit again. Who marries me +Must lead a country life. + +Clif. The life I'd lead! +But fools would fly from it; for O! 'tis sweet! +It finds the heart out, be there one to find; +And corners in't where store of pleasures lodge, +We never dreamed were there! It is to dwell +'Mid smiles that are not neighbours to deceit; +Music, whose melody is of the heart; +And gifts, that are not made for interest, - +Abundantly bestowed by Nature's cheek, +And voice, and hand! It is to live on life, +And husband it! It is to constant scan +The handiwork of Heaven. It is to con +Its mercy, bounty, wisdom, power! It is +To nearer see our God! + +Julia. How like he talks +To Master Walter! Shall I give it o'er? +Not yet. Thou wouldst not live one half a year! +A quarter mightst thou for the novelty +Of fields and trees; but then it needs must be +In summer time, when they go dressed. + +Clif. Not it! +In any time--say winter! Fields and trees +Have charms for me in very winter time. + +Julia. But snow may clothe them then. + +Clif. I like them full +As well in snow! + +Julia. You do? + +Clif. I do. + +Julia. But night +Will hide both snow and them, and that sets in +Ere afternoon is out. A heavy thing, +A country fireside in a winter's night, +To one bred in the town,--where winter's said, +For sun of gaiety and sportiveness, +To beggar shining summer. + +Clif. I should like +A country winter's night especially! + +Julia. You'd sleep by the fire. + +Clif. Not I; I'd talk to thee. + +Julia. You'd tire of that! + +Clif. I'd read to thee. + +Julia. And that! + +Clif. I'd talk to thee again. + +Julia. And sooner tire +Than first you did, and fall asleep at last. +You'd never do to lead a country life. + +Clif. You deal too harshly with me! Matchless maid, +As loved instructor brightens dullest wit, +Fear not to undertake the charge of me! +A willing pupil kneels to thee, and lays +His title and his fortune at your feet. + +Julia. His title and his fortune! + +[Enter MASTER WALTER and HELEN.--JULIA, disconcerted, retires with +the latter.--CLIFFORD rises.] + +Wal. So, Sir Thomas! +Aha! you husband time! Well, was I right? +Is't not the jewel that I told you 'twas? +Wouldst thou not give thine eyes to wear it? Eh? +It has an owner, though,--nay, start not,--one +That may be bought to part with't, and with whom +I'll stand thy friend--I will--I say, I will! +A strange man, sir, and unaccountable: +But I can humour him--will humour him +For thy sake, good Sir Thomas; for I like thee. +Well, is't a bargain? Come, thy hand upon it. +A word or two with thee. + +[They retire. JULIA and HELEN come forward.] + +Julia. Go up to town! + +Helen. Have I not said it ten times o'er to thee? +But if thou likest it not, protest against it. + +Julia. Not if 'tis Master Walter's will. + +Helen. What then? +Thou wouldst not break thy heart for Master Walter? + +Julia. That follows not! + +Helen. What follows not? + +Julia. That I +Should break my heart, because we go to town. + +Helen. Indeed?--Oh, that's another matter. Well, +I'd e'en advise thee then to do his will; +And, ever after, when I prophesy, +Believe me, Julia! + +[They retire. MASTER WALTER comes forward.] + +[Enter FATHOM.] + +Fath. So please you, sir, a letter,--a post-haste letter! The +bearer on horseback, the horse in a foam--smoking like a boiler at +the heat--be sure a posthaste letter! + +Wal. Look to the horse and rider. + +[Opens the letter and reads.] + +What's this? A testament addressed to me, +Found in his lordship's escritoire, and thence +Directed to be taken by no hand +But mine. My presence instantly required. + +[SIR THOMAS, JULIA, and HELEN come forward.] + +Come, my mistresses, +You dine in town to-day. Your father's will, +It is, my Julia, that you see the world; +And thou shalt see it in its best attire. +Its gayest looks--its richest finery +It shall put on for thee, that thou may'st judge +Betwixt it, and this rural life you've lived. +Business of moment I'm but thus advised of, +Touching the will of my late noble master, +The Earl of Rochdale, recently deceased, +Commands me for a time to leave thee there. +Sir Thomas, hand her to the chariot. Nay, +I tell thee true. We go indeed to town! + +[They go out.] + + + +ACT II. + + + +SCENE I.--An Apartment in Master Heartwell's House. + + +[Enter FATHOM and THOMAS.] + +Thos. Well, Fathom, is thy mistress up? + +Fath. She is, Master Thomas, and breakfasted. + +Thos. She stands it well! 'Twas five, you say, when she came home; +and wants it now three-quarters of an hour of ten? Wait till her +stock of country health is out. + +Fath. 'Twill come to that, Master Thomas, before she lives another +month in town! three, four, five six o'clock are now the hours she +keeps. 'Twas otherwise with her in the country. There, my mistress +used to rise what time she now lies down. + +Thos. Why, yes; she's changed since she came hither. + +Fath. Changed, do you say, Master Thomas? Changed, forsooth! I +know not the thing in which she is not changed, saving that she is +still a woman. I tell thee there is no keeping pace with her moods. +In the country she had none of them. When I brought what she asked +for, it was "Thank you, Fathom," and no more to do; but now, nothing +contents her. Hark ye! were you a gentleman, Master Thomas,--for +then you know you would be a different kind of man,--how many times +would you have your coat altered? + +Thos. Why, Master Fathom, as many times as it would take to make it +fit me. + +Fath. Good! But, supposing it fitted thee at the first? + +Thos. Then would I have it altered not at all. + +Fath. Good! Thou wouldst be a reasonable gentleman. Thou wouldst +have a conscience. Now hark to a tale about my lady's last gown. +How many times, think you, took I it back to the sempstress? + +Thos. Thrice, may be. + +Fath. Thrice, may be! Twenty times, may be; and not a turn too +many, for the truth on't. Twenty times, on the oath of the +sempstress. Now mark me--can you count? + +Thos. After a fashion. + +Fath. You have much to be thankful for, Master Thomas. You London +serving-men have a world of things, which we in the country never +dream of. Now mark:- Four times took I it back for the flounce; +twice for the sleeves; three for the tucker--How many times in all +is that? + +Thos. Eight times to a fraction, Master Fathom. + +Fath. What a master of figures you are! Eight times--now recollect +that! And then found she fault with the trimmings. Now tell me, +how many times took I back the gown for the trimmings? + +Thos. Eight times more, perhaps! + +Fath. Ten times to a certainty. How many times makes that? + +Thos. Eighteen, Master Fathom, by the rule of addition. + +Fath. And how many times more will make twenty? + +Thee. Twice, by the same rule. + +Fath. Thou hast worked with thy pencil and slate, Master Thomas! +Well, ten times, as I said, took I back the gown for the trimmings; +and was she content after all? I warrant you no, or my ears did not +pay for it. She wished, she said, that the slattern sempstress had +not touched the gown, for nought had she done but botched it. Now +what think you had the sempstress done to the gown? + +Thos. To surmise that, I must be learned in the sempstress's art. + +Fath. The sempstress's art! Thou hast hit it! Oh, the sweet +sempstress! the excellent sempstress! Mistress of her scissors and +needles, which are pointless and edgeless to her art! The +sempstress had done nothing to the gown; yet raves and storms my +mistress at her for having botched it in the making and mending; and +orders her straight to make another one, which home the sempstress +brings on Tuesday last. + +Thos. And found thy fair mistress as many faults with that? + +Fath. Not one! She finds it a very pattern of a gown! A well- +sitting flounce! The sleeves a fit--the tucker a fit--the trimmings +her fancy to a T--ha! ha! ha! and she praised the sempstress--ha! +ha! ha! and she smiles at me, and I smile--ha! ha! ha! and the +sempstress smiles--ha! ha! ha! Now, why did the sempstress smile? + +Thos. That she had succeeded so well in her art. + +Fath. Thou hast hit it again! The jade must have been born a +sempstress! If ever I marry, she shall work for my wife. The gown +was the same gown, and there was my mistress's twentieth mood! + +Thos. What think you will Master Walter say when he comes back? I +fear he'll hardly know his country maid again. Has she yet fixed +her wedding-day? + +Fath. She has, Master Thomas. I coaxed it from her maid. She +marries, Monday week. + +Thos. Comes not Master Walter back to-day? + +Fath. Your master expects him. [A ringing.] Perhaps that's he. I +prithee go and open the door; do, Master Thomas, do; for proves it +my master, he'll surely question me. + +Thos. And what should I do? + +Fath. Answer him, Master Thomas, and make him none the wiser. +He'll go mad, when he learns how my lady flaunts it! Go! open the +door, I prithee. Fifty things, Master Thomas, know you, for one +thing that I know! You can turn and twist a matter into any other +kind of matter; and then twist and turn it back again, if needs be; +so much you servants of the town beat us of the country, Master +Thomas. Open the door, now; do, Master Thomas, do! + +[They go out.] + + +SCENE II.--A Garden with two Arbours. + + +[Enter MASTER HEARTWELL and MASTER WALTER meeting.] + +Heart. Good Master Walter, welcome back again! + +Wal. I'm glad to see you, Master Heartwell! + +Heart. How, +I pray you, sped the mighty business which +So sudden called you hence? + +Wal. Weighty, indeed! +What thou wouldst ne'er expect--wilt scarce believe! +Long-hidden wrong, wondrously come to light, +And great right done! But more of this anon. +Now of my ward discourse! Likes she the town? +How does she? Is she well? Canst match me her +Among your city maids? + +Heart. Nor court ones neither! +She far outstrips them all! + +Wal. I knew she would. +What else could follow in a maid so bred? +A pure mind, Master Heartwell!--not a taint +From intercourse with the distempered town; +With which all contact was walled out, until, +Matured in soundness, I could trust her to it, +And sleep amidst infection! + +Heart. Master Walter! + +Wal. Well? + +Heart. Tell me, prithee, which is likelier +To plough a sea in safety?--he that's wont +To sail in it,--or he that by the chart +Is master of its soundings, bearings,--knows +Is headlands, havens, currents--where 'tis bold, +And where behoves to keep a good look-out. +The one will swim, where sinks the other one? + +Wal. The drift of this? + +Heart. Do you not guess it? + +Wal. Humph! + +Heart. If you would train a maid to live in town, +Breed her not in the country! + +Wal. Say you so? +And stands she not the test? + +Heart. As snow stands fire! +Your country maid has melted all away, +And plays the city lady to the height; +Her mornings gives to mercers, milliners, +Shoemakers, jewellers, and haberdashers; +Her noons, to calls; her afternoons, to dressing; +Evenings, to plays and drums; and nights, to routs, +Balls, masquerades! Sleep only ends the riot, +Which waking still begins! + +Wal. I'm all amaze! +How bears Sir Thomas this? + +Heart. Why, patiently; +Though one can see with pain. + +Wal. She loves him? Ha! +That shrug is doubt! She'd ne'er consent to wed him +Unless she loved him!--never! Her young fancy +The pleasures of the town--new things--have caught, +Anon their hold will slacken; she'll become +Her former self again; to its old train +Of sober feelings will her heart return; +And then she'll give it wholly to the man +Her virgin wishes chose! + +Heart. Here comes Sir Thomas; +And with him Master Modus. + +Wal. Let them pass: +I would not see him till I speak with her. + +[They retire into one of the Arbours.] + +[Enter CLIFFORD and MODUS.] + +Clif. A dreadful question is it, when we love, +To ask if love's returned! I did believe +Fair Julia's heart was mine--I doubt it now! +But once last night she danced with me, her hand, +To this gallant and that engaged, as soon +As asked for? Maid that loved would scarce do this? +Nor visit we together as we used, +When first she came to town. She loves me less +Than once she did--or loves me not at all. + +Mod. I'm little skilled, Sir Thomas, in the world: +What mean you now to do? + +Clif. Remonstrate with her; +Come to an understanding, and, at once, +If she repents her promise to be mine, +Absolve her from it--and say farewell to her. + +Mod. Lo, then, your opportunity--she comes - +My cousin also: --her will I engage, +Whilst you converse together. + +Clif. Nay, not yet! +My heart turns coward at the sight of her. +Stay till it finds new courage! Let them pass. + +[CLIFFORD and MODUS retire into the other Arbour.] + +[Enter JULIA and HELEN.] + +Helen. So, Monday week will say good morn to thee +A maid, and bid good night a sober wife! + +Julia. That Monday week, I trust, will never come, +That brags to make a sober wife of me! + +Helen. How changed you are, my Julia! + +Julia. Change makes change. + +Helen. Why wedd'st thou, then? + +Julia. Because I promised him! + +Helen. Thou lovest him? + +Julia. Do I? + +Helen. He's a man to love! +A right well-favoured man! + +Julia. Your point's well favoured. +Where did you purchase it? In Gracechurch Street? + +Helen. Pshaw! never mind my point, but talk of him. + +Julia. I'd rather talk with thee about the lace. +Where bought you it? In Gracechurch Street, Cheapside, +Whitechapel, Little Britain? Can't you say +Where 'twas you bought the lace? + +Helen. In Cheapside, then. +And now, then, to Sir Thomas! He is just +The height I like a man. + +Julia. Thy feather's just +The height I like a feather! Mine's too short! +What shall I give thee in exchange for it? + +Helen. What shall I give thee for a minute's talk +About Sir Thomas? + +Julia. Why, thy feather. + +Helen. Take it! + +Clif. [Aside to Modus.] What, likes she not to speak of me? + +Helen. And now +Let's talk about Sir Thomas--much I'm sure +He loves you. + +Julia. Much I'm sure, he has a right! +Those know I who would give their eyes to be +Sir Thomas, for my sake! + +Helen. Such too, know I. +But 'mong them none that can compare with him, +Not one so graceful. + +Julia. What a graceful set +Your feather has! + +Helen. Nay, give it back to me, +Unless you pay me for't. + +Julia. What was't to get? + +Helen. A minute's talk with thee about Sir Thomas. + +Julia. Talk of his title, and his fortune then. + +Clif. [Aside.] Indeed! I would not listen, yet I must! + +Julia. An ample fortune, Helen--I shall be +A happy wife! What routs, what balls, what masques, +What gala-days! + +Clif. [Aside.] For these she marries me! +She'll talk of these! + +Julia. Think not, when I am wed, +I'll keep the house as owlet does her tower, +Alone,--when every other bird's on wing. +I'll use my palfrey, Helen; and my coach; +My barge, too, for excursion on the Thames: +What drives to Barnet, Hackney, Islington! +What rides to Epping, Hounslow, and Blackheath! +What sails to Greenwich, Woolwich, Fulham, Kew! +I'll set a pattern to your lady wives! + +Clif. [Aside.] Ay, lady? Trust me, not at my expense. + +Julia. And what a wardrobe! I'll have change of suits +For every day in the year! and sets for days! +My morning dress, my noon dress, dinner dress, +And evening dress! Then will I show you lace +A foot deep, can I purchase; if not, +I'll specially bespeak it. Diamonds too! +Not buckles, rings, and earrings only--but +Whole necklaces and stomachers of gems! +I'll shine! be sure I will. + +Clif. [Aside.] Then shine away; +Who covets thee may wear thee;--I'm not he! + +Julia. And then my title! Soon as I put on +The ring, I'm Lady Clifford. So I take +Precedence of plain mistress, were she e'en +The richest heiress in the land! At town +Or country ball, you'll see me take the lead, +While wives that carry on their backs the wealth +To dower a princess, shall give place to me; - +Will I not profit, think you, by my right? +Be sure I will! marriage shall prove to me +A never-ending pageant. Every day +Shall show how I am spoused! I will be known +For Lady Clifford all the city through, +And fifty miles the country round about. +Wife of Sir Thomas Clifford, baronet - +Not perishable knight--who, when he makes +A lady of me, doubtless must expect +To see me play the part of one. + +Clif. [Coming forward.] Most true; +But not the part which you design to play. + +Julia. A listener, sir! + +Clif. By chance, and not intent, +Your speech was forced upon mine ear, that ne'er +More thankless duty to my heart discharged! +Would for that heart it ne'er had known the sense +Which tells it 'tis a bankrupt, there, where most +It coveted to be rich, and thought it was so! +O Julia, is it you? Could I have set +A coronet upon that stately brow, +Where partial nature hath already bound +A brighter circlet--radiant beauty's own - +I had been proud to see thee proud of it, +So for the donor thou hadst ta'en the gift, +Not for the gift ta'en him. Could I have poured +The wealth of richest Croesus in thy lap, +I had been blest to see thee scatter it, +So I was still thy riches paramount! + +Julia. Know you me, sir! + +Clif. I do. On Monday week +We were to wed--and are--so you're content; +The day that weds, wives you to be widowed. Take +The privilege of my wife; be Lady Clifford! +Outshine the title in the wearing on't! +My coffers, lands, all are at thy command; +Wear all! but, for myself, she wears not me, +Although the coveted of every eye, +Who would not wear me for myself alone. + +Julia. And do you carry it so proudly, sir? + +Clif. Proudly, but still more sorrowfully, lady! +I'll lead thee to the church on Monday week. +Till then, farewell and then, farewell for ever! +O Julia, I have ventured for thy love, +As the bold merchant, who, for only hope +Of some rich gain, all former gains will risk. +Before I asked a portion of thy heart, +I perilled all my own; and now, all's lost! + +[CLIFFORD and MODUS go out.] + +Julia. Helen! + +Helen. What ails you, sweet? + +Julia. I cannot breathe--quick, loose my girdle, oh! + +[Faints.] + +[MASTER WALTER and MASTER HEARTWELL come forward.] + +Wal. Good Master Heartwell, help to take her in, +Whilst I make after him! and look to her! +Unlucky chance that took me out of town! + +[They go out severally.] + + +SCENE III.--The Street. + + +[Enter CLIFFORD and STEPHEN, meeting.] + +Ste. Letters, Sir Thomas. + +Clif. Take them home again, +I shall not read them now. + +Ste. Your pardon, sir, +But here is one directed strangely. + +Clif. How? + +Ste. "To Master Clifford, gentleman, now styled +Sir Thomas Clifford, baronet." + +Clif. Indeed! +Whence comes that letter? + +Ste. From abroad. + +Clif. Which is it? + +Ste. So please you, this, Sir Thomas. + +Clif. Give it me. + +Ste. That letter brings not news to wish him joy upon. If he was +disturbed before, which I guessed by his looks he was, he is not +more at ease now. His hand to his head! A most unwelcome letter! +If it brings him news of disaster, fortune does not give him his +deserts; for never waited servant upon a kinder master. + +Clif. Stephen! + +Ste. Sir Thomas! + +Clif. From my door remove +The plate that bears my name. + +Ste. The plate, Sir Thomas! + +Clif. The plate--collect my servants and instruct them +To make out each their claims, unto the end +Of their respective terms, and give them in +To my steward. Him and them apprise, good fellow, +That I keep house no more. As you go home, +Call at my coachmaker's and bid him stop +The carriage I bespoke. The one I have +Send with my horses to the mart whereat +Such things are sold by auction. They're for sale; +Pack up my wardrobe, have my trunks conveyed +To the inn in the next street; and when that's done, +Go round my tradesmen and collect their bills, +And bring them to me at the inn. + +Ste. The inn! + +Clif. Yes; I go home no more. Why, what's the matter? +What has fallen out to make your eyes fill up? +You'll get another place. I'll certify +You're honest and industrious, and all +That a servant ought to be. + +Ste. I see, Sir Thomas, +Some great misfortune has befallen you? + +Clif. No! +I have health; I have strength; my reason, Stephen, and +A heart that's clear in truth, with trust in God. +No great disaster can befall the man +Who's still possessed of these! Good fellow, leave me. +What you would learn, and have a right to know, +I would not tell you now. Good Stephen, hence! +Mischance has fallen on me--but what of that? +Mischance has fallen on many a better man. +I prithee leave me. I grow sadder while +I see the eye with which you view my grief. +'Sdeath, they will out! I would have been a man, +Had you been less a kind and gentle one. +Now, as you love me, leave me. + +Ste. Never master +So well deserved the love of him that served him. + +[STEPHEN goes out.] + +Clif. Misfortune liketh company; it seldom +Visits its friends alone. Ha! Master Walter, +And ruffled too. I'm in no mood for him. + +[Enter MASTER WALTER.] + +Wal. So, Sir--Sir Thomas Clifford! what with speed +And choler--I do gasp for want of breath. + +Clif. Well, Master Walter? + +Wal. You're a rash young man, sir; +Strong-headed and wrong-headed, and I fear, sir, +Not over delicate in that fine sense +Which men of honour pride themselves upon! + +Clif. Well, Master Walter? + +Wal. A young woman's heart, sir, +Is not a stone to carve a posy on! +Which knows not what is writ on't; which you may buy, +Exchange, or sell, sir, keep or give away, sir: +It is a richer--yet a poorer thing; +Priceless to him that owns and prizes it; +Worthless, when owned, not prized; which makes the man +That covets it, obtains it, and discards it - +A fool, if not a villain, sir. + +Clif. Well, sir? + +Wal. You never loved my ward, sir! + +Clif. The bright Heavens +Bear witness that I did! + +Wal. The bright Heavens, sir, +Bear not false witness. That you loved her not +Is clear--for had you loved her, you'd have plucked +Your heart from out your breast, ere cast her from your heart! +Old as I am, I know what passion is. +It is the summer's heat, sir, which in vain +We look for frost in. Ice, like you, sir, knows +But little of such heat! We are wronged, sir, wronged! +You wear a sword, and so do I. + +Clif. Well, sir! + +Wal. You know the use, sir, of a sword? + +Clif. I do. +To whip a knave, sir, or an honest man! +A wise man or a fool--atone for wrong, +Or double the amount on't! Master Walter, +Touching your ward, if wrong is done, I think +On my side lies the grievance. I would not say so +Did I not think so. As for love--look, sir, +That hand's a widower's, to its first mate sworn +To clasp no second one. As for amends, sir, +You're free to get them from a man in whom +You've been forestalled by fortune, for the spite +Which she has vented on him, if you still +Esteem him worth your anger. Please you read +That letter. Now, sir, judge if life is dear +To one so much a loser. + +Wal. What, all gone! +Thy cousin living they reported dead! + +Clif. Title and land, sir, unto which add love! +All gone, save life and honour, which, ere I'll lose, +I'll let the other go. + +Wal. We're public here, +And may be interrupted. Let us seek +Some spot of privacy. Your letter, sir. + +[Gives it back.] + +Though fortune slights you, I'll not slight you; not +Your title or the lack of it I heed. +Whether upon the score of love or hate, +With you and you alone I settle, sir. +We've gone too far. 'Twere folly now to part +Without a reckoning. + +Clif. Just as you please. + +Wal. You've done +A noble lady wrong. + +Clif. That lady, sir, +Has done me wrong. + +Wal. Go to, thou art a boy +Fit to be trusted with a plaything, not +A woman's heart. Thou knowest not what it is! +And that I'll prove to thee, soon as we find +Convenient place. Come on, sir! you shall get +A lesson that shall serve you for the rest +Of your life. I'll make you own her, sir, a piece +Of Nature's handiwork, as costly, free +From bias, flaw, and fair, as ever yet +Her cunning hand turned out. Come on, sir! come! + +[They go out.] + + + +ACT III. + + + +SCENE I.--A Drawing-room. + + +[ENTER LORD TINSEL and the EARL OF ROCHDALE.] + +Tin. Refuse a lord! A saucy lady this. +I scarce can credit it. + +Roch. She'll change her mind. +My agent, Master Walter, is her guardian. + +Tin. How can you keep that Hunchback in his office? +He mocks you. + +Roch. He is useful. Never heed him. +My offer now do I present through him. +He has the title-deeds of my estates, +She'll listen to their wooing. I must have her. +Not that I love her, but that all allow +She's fairest of the fair. + +Tin. Distinguished well! +'Twere most unseemly for a lord to love! - +Leave that to commoners! 'Tis vulgar--she's +Betrothed, you tell me, to Sir Thomas Clifford? + +Roch. Yes. + +Tin. That a commoner should thwart a lord! +Yet not a commoner. A baronet +Is fish and flesh. Nine parts plebeian, and +Patrician in the tenth. Sir Thomas Clifford! +A man, they say, of brains! I abhor brains +As I do tools: they're things mechanical. +So far are we above our forefathers +They to their brains did owe their titles, as +Do lawyers, doctors. We to nothing owe them, +Which makes us far the nobler. + +Roch. Is it so? + +Tin. Believe me. You shall profit by my training; +You grow a lord apace. I saw you meet +A bevy of your former friends, who fain +Had shaken hands with you. You gave them fingers! +You're now another man. Your house is changed - +Your table changed--your retinue--your horse - +Where once you rode a hack, you now back blood; - +Befits it, then, you also change your friends! + +[Enter WILLIAMS.] + +Will. A gentleman would see your lordship. + +Tin. Sir! +What's that? + +Will. A gentleman would see his lordship. + +Tin. How know you, sir, his lordship is at home? +Is he at home because he goes not out? +He's not at home, though there you see him, sir; +Unless he certify that he's at home! +Bring up the name of the gentleman, and then +Your lord will know if he's at home or not. + +[WILLIAMS goes out.] + +Your man was porter to some merchant's door, +Who never taught him better breeding +Than to speak the vulgar truth! Well, sir? + +[WILLIAMS having re-entered.] + +Will. His name, +So please your lordship, Markham. + +Tin. Do you know +The thing? + +Roch. Right well! I'faith a hearty fellow, +Son to a worthy tradesman, who would do +Great things with little means; so entered him +In the Temple. A good fellow, on my life. +Nought smacking of his stock! + +Tin. You've said enough! +His lordship's not at home. + +[WILLIAMS goes out.] + +We do not go +By hearts, but orders! Had he family - +Blood--though it only were a drop--his heart +Would pass for something; lacking such desert, +Were it ten times the heart it is, 'tis nought! + +[Enter WILLIAMS.] + +Will. One Master Jones hath asked to see you lordship. + +Tin. And what was your reply to Master Jones? + +Will. I knew not if his lordship was at home. + +Tin. You'll do. Who's Master Jones? + +Roch. A curate's son. + +Tin. A curate's! Better be a yeoman's son! +Was it the rector's son, he might be known, +Because the rector is a rising man, +And may become a bishop. He goes light, +The curate ever hath a loaded back! +He may be called the yeoman of the church, +That sweating does his work, and drudges on, +While lives the hopeful rector at his ease. +How made you his acquaintance, pray? + +Roch. We read +Latin and Greek together. + +Tin. Dropping them - +As, now that you're a lord, of course you've done - +Drop him--You'll say his lordship's not at home. + +Will. So please your lordship, I forgot to say, +One Richard Cricket likewise is below. + +Tin. Who?--Richard Cricket! You must see him, Rochdale! +A noble little fellow! A great man, sir! +Not knowing whom, you would be nobody! +I won five thousand pounds by him! + +Roch. Who is he? +I never heard of him. + +Tin. What! never heard +Of Richard Cricket!--never heard of him! +Why, he's the jockey of Newmarket; you +May win a cup by him, or else a sweepstakes. +I bade him call upon you. You must see him. +His lordship is at home to Richard Cricket. + +Roch. Bid him wait in the ante-room. + +[WILLIAMS goes out.] + +Tin. The ante-room! +The best room in your house! You do not know +The use of Richard Cricket! Show him, sir, +Into the drawing-room. Your lordship needs +Must keep a racing stud, and you'll do well +To make a friend of Richard Cricket. Well, sir: +What's that? + +[Enter WILLIAMS.] + +Will. So please your lordship, a petition. + +Tin. Hadst not a service 'mongst the Hottentots +Ere thou camest hither, friend? Present thy lord +With a petition! At mechanics' doors, +At tradesmen's, shopkeepers', and merchants' only, +Have such things leave to knock! Make thy lord's gate +A wicket to a workhouse! Let us see it - +Subscriptions to a book of poetry! +Cornelius Tense, M.A. +Which means he construes Greek and Latin, works +Problems in mathematics, can chop logic, +And is a conjurer in philosophy, +Both natural and moral.--Pshaw! a man +Whom nobody, that is anybody, knows! +Who, think you, follows him? Why, an M.D., +An F.R.S., an F.AS., and then +A D.D., Doctor of Divinity, +Ushering in an LL.D., which means +Doctor of Laws--their harmony, no doubt, +The difference of their trades! There's nothing here +But languages, and sciences, and arts. +Not an iota of nobility! +We cannot give our names. Take back the paper, +And tell the bearer there's no answer for him:- +That is the lordly way of saying "No." +But, talking of subscriptions, here is one +To which your lordship may affix your name. + +Roch. Pray, who's the object? + +Tin. A most worthy man! +A man of singular deserts; a man +In serving whom your lordship will serve me, - +Signor Cantata. + +Roch. He's a friend of yours? + +Tin. Oh, no, I know him not! I've not that pleasure. +But Lady Dangle knows him; she's his friend, +He will oblige us with a set of concerts, +Six concerts to the set.--The set, three guineas. +Your lordship will subscribe? + +Roch. Oh, by all means. + +Tin. How many sets of tickets? Two at least. +You'll like to take a friend? I'll set you down +Six guineas to Signor Cantata's concerts, +And now, my Lord, we'll to him; then we'll walk. + +Roch. Nay, I would wait the lady's answer. + +Tin. Wait! take an excursion to the country; let +Her answer wait for you! + +Roch. Indeed! + +Tin. Indeed! +Befits a lord nought like indifference. +Say an estate should fall to you, you'd take it +As it concerned more a stander by +Than you. As you're a lord, be sure you ever +Of that make little other men make much of; +Nor do the thing they do, but the right contrary. +Where the distinction else 'twixt them and you? + +[They go out.] + + +SCENE II.--An Apartment in Master Heartwell's House. + + +[MASTER WALTER discovered looking through title-deeds and papers.] + +Wal. So falls out everything, as I would have it, +Exact in place and time. This lord's advances +Receives she,--as, I augur, in the spleen +Of wounded pride she will,--my course is clear. +She comes--all's well--the tempest rages still. + +[JULIA enters, and paces the room in a state of high excitement.] + +Julia. What have my eyes to do with water? Fire +Becomes them better! + +Wal. True! + +Julia. Yet, must I weep +To be so monitored, and by a man! +A man that was my slave! whom I have seen +Kneel at my feet from morn till noon, content +With leave to only gaze upon my face, +And tell me what he read there,--till the page +I knew by heart, I 'gan to doubt I knew, +Emblazoned by the comment of his tongue! +And he to lesson me! Let him come here +On Monday week! He ne'er leads me to church! +I would not profit by his rank, or wealth, +Though kings might call him cousin, for their sake! +I'll show him I have pride! + +Wal. You're very right! + +Julia. He would have had to-day our wedding-day! +I fixed a month from this. He prayed and prayed; +I dropped a week. He prayed and prayed the more! +I dropped a second one. Still more he prayed! +And I took off another week,--and now +I have his leave to wed, or not to wed! +He'll see that I have pride! + +Wal. And so he ought. + +Julia. O! for some way to bring him to my foot! +But he should lie there! Why, 'twill go abroad +That he has cast me off. That there should live +The man could say so! Or that I should live +To be the leavings of a man! + +Wal. Thy case +I own a hard one! + +Julia. Hard? 'Twill drive me mad! +His wealth and title! I refused a lord - +I did!--that privily implored my hand, +And never cared to tell him on't! So much +I hate him now, that lord should not in vain +Implore my hand again! + +Wal. You'd give it him? + +Julia. I would. + +Wal. You'd wed that lord? + +Julia. That lord I'd wed; - +Or any other lord,--only to show him +That I could wed above him! + +Wal. Give me your hand +And word to that. + +Julia. There! Take my hand and word! + +Wal. That lord hath offered you his hand again. + +Julia. He has? + +Wal. Your father knows it: he approves of him. +There are the title-deeds of the estates, +Sent for my jealous scrutiny. All sound, - +No flaw, or speck, that e'en the lynx-eyed law +Itself could find. A lord of many lands! +In Berkshire half a county; and the same +In Wiltshire, and in Lancashire! Across +The Irish Sea a principality! +And not a rood with bond or lien on it! +Wilt give that lord a wife? Wilt make thyself +A countess? Here's the proffer of his hand. +Write thou content, and wear a coronet! + +Julia. [Eagerly.] Give me the paper. + +Wal. There! Here's pen and ink. +Sit down. Why do you pause? A flourish of +The pen, and you're a countess. + +Julia. My poor brain +Whirls round and round! I would not wed him now, +Were he more lowly at my feet to sue +Than e'er he did! + +Wal. Wed whom? + +Julia. Sir Thomas Clifford. + +Wal. You're right. + +Julia. His rank and wealth are roots to doubt; +And while they lasted, still the weed would grow, +Howe'er you plucked it. No! That's o'er--that's done. +Was never lady wronged so foul as I! [Weeps.] + +Wal. Thou'rt to be pitied. + +Julia. [Aroused.] Pitied! Not so bad +As that. + +Wal. Indeed thou art, to love the man +That spurns thee! + +Julia. Love him! Love! If hate could find +A word more harsh than its own name, I'd take it, +To speak the love I bear him! [Weeps.] + +Wal. Write thy own name, +And show him how near akin thy hate's to hate. + +Julia. [Writes.] 'Tis done! + +Wal. 'Tis well! I'll come to you anon! [Goes out.] + +Julia. [Alone.] I'm glad 'tis done! I'm very glad 'tis done! +I've done the thing I ought. From my disgrace +This lord shall lift me 'bove the reach of scorn - +That idly wags its tongue, where wealth and state +Need only beckon to have crowds to laud! +Then how the tables change! The hand he spurned +His betters take! Let me remember that! +I'll grace my rank! I will! I'll carry it +As I was born to it! I warrant none +Shall say it fits me not:- but, one and all +Confess I wear it bravely, as I ought! +And he shall hear it! Ay, and he shall see it! +I will roll by him in an equipage +Would mortgage his estate--but he shall own +His slight of me was my advancement! Love me! +He never loved me! if he had, he ne'er +Had given me up! Love's not a spider's web +But fit to mesh a fly--that you can break +By only blowing on't! He never loved me! +He knows not what love is!--or, if he does, +He has not been o'erchary of his peace! +And that he'll find when I'm another's wife, +Lost!--lost to him for ever! Tears again! +Why should I weep for him? Who make their woes. +Deserve them! What have I to do with tears? + +[Enter HELEN.] + +Helen. News, Julia, news! + +Julia. What! is't about Sir Thomas? + +Helen. Sir Thomas, say you? He's no more Sir Thomas! +That cousin lives, as heir to whom, his wealth +And title came to him. + +Julia. Was he not dead? + +Helen. No more than I am dead. + +Julia. I would 'twere not so. + +Helen. What say you, Julia? + +Julia. Nothing! + +Helen. I could kiss +That cousin! couldn't you, Julia? + +Julia. Wherefore? + +Helen. Why +For coming back to life again, as 'twere +Upon his cousin to revenge you. + +Julia. Helen! + +Helen. Indeed 'tis true. With what a sorry grace +The gentleman will bear himself without +His title! Master Clifford! Have you not +Some token to return him? Some love-letter? +Some brooch? Some pin? Some anything? I'll be +Your messenger, for nothing but the pleasure +Of calling him plain "Master Clifford." + +Julia. Helen! + +Helen. Or has he aught of thine? Write to him, Julia, +Demanding it! Do, Julia, if you love me; +And I'll direct it in a schoolboy's hand, +As round as I can write, "To Master Clifford." + +Julia. Helen! + +Helen. I'll think of fifty thousand ways +To mortify him! I've a twentieth cousin, +A care-for-nought, at mischief. Him I'll set, +With twenty other madcaps like himself, +To walk the streets the traitor most frequents +And give him salutation as he passes - +"How do you, Master Clifford?" + +Julia. [Highly incensed.] Helen! + +Helen. Bless me! + +Julia. I hate you, Helen! + +[Enter MODUS.] + +Mod. Joy for you, fair lady! +Our baronet is now plain gentleman - +And hardly that, not master of the means +To bear himself as such. The kinsman lives +Whose only rumoured death gave wealth to him, +And title. A hard creditor he proves, +Who keeps strict reckoning--will have interest. +As well as principal. A ruined man +Is now Sir Thomas Clifford! + +Helen. I'm glad on't. + +Mod. And so am I, +A scurvy trick it was +He served you, madam. Use a lady so! +I merely bore with him. I never liked him. + +Helen. No more did I. No, never could I think +He looked his title. + +Mod. No, nor acted it. +If rightly they report, he ne'er disbursed +To entertain his friends, 'tis broadly said, +A hundred pounds in the year! He was most poor +In the appointments of a man of rank, +Possessing wealth like his. His horses, hacks! +His gentleman, a footman! and his footman, +A groom! The sports that men of quality +And spirit countenance, he kept aloof from, +From scruple of economy, not taste, - +As racing and the like. In brief, he lacked +Those shining points that, more than name, denote +High breeding; and, moreover, was a man +Of very shallow learning. + +Julia. Silence, sir! +For shame! + +Helen. Why, Julia! + +Julia. Speak not to me! Poor! +Most poor! I tell you, sir, he was the making +Of fifty gentlemen--each one of whom +Were more than peer for thee! His title, sir, +Lent him no grace he did not pay it back! +Though it had been the highest of the high, +He would have looked it, felt it, acted it, +As thou couldst ne'er have done! When found you out +You liked him not? It was not ere to-day! +Or that base spirit I must reckon yours +Which smiles where it would scowl--can stoop to hate +And fear to show it! He was your better, sir, +And is!--Ay, is! though stripped of rank and wealth, +His nature's 'bove or fortune's love or spite, +To blazon or to blurr it! [Retires.] + +Mod. [To HELEN.] I was told +Much to disparage him--I know not wherefore. + +Helen. And so was I, and know as much the cause. + +[Enter MASTER WALTER, with parchments.] + +Wal. Joy, my Julia! +Impatient love has foresight! Lo you here +The marriage deeds filled up, except a blank +To write your jointure. What you will, my girl! +Is this a lover? Look! Three thousand pounds +Per annum for your private charges! Ha! +There's pin-money! Is this a lover? Mark +What acres, forests, tenements, are taxed +For your revenue; and so set apart, +That finger cannot touch them, save thine own. +Is this a lover? What good fortune's thine! +Thou dost not speak; but, 'tis the way with joy! +With richest heart, it has the poorest tongue! + +Mod. What great good fortune's this you speak of, sir? + +Wal. A coronet, Master Modus! You behold +The wife elect, sir, of no less a man +Than the new Earl of Rochdale--heir of him +That's recently deceased. + +Helen. My dearest Julia, +Much joy to you! + +Mod. All good attend you, madam! + +Wal. This letter brings excuses from his lordship, +Whose absence it accounts for. He repairs +To his estate in Lancashire, and thither +We follow. + +Julia. When, sir? + +Wal. Now. This very hour. + +Julia. This very hour! O cruel, fatal haste! + +Wal. "O cruel, fatal haste!" What meanest thou? +Have I done wrong to do thy bidding, then? +I have done no more. Thou wast an offcast bride, +And wouldst be an affianced one--thou art so! +Thou'dst have the slight that marked thee out for scorn, +Converted to a means of gracing thee - +It is so! If our wishes come too soon, +What can make sure of welcome? In my zeal +To win thee thine, thou know'st, at any time +I'd play the steed, whose will to serve his lord, +With his last breath gives his last bound for him! +Since only noon have I despatched what well +Had kept a brace of clerks, and more, on foot - +And then, perhaps, had been to do again! - +Not finished sure, complete--the compact firm, +As fate itself had sealed it! + +Julia. Give you thanks! +Though 'twere my death! my death! + +Wal. Thy death! indeed, +For happiness like this, one well might die! +Take thy lord's letter! Well? + +[Enter THOMAS, with a letter.] + +Thos. This letter, sir, +The gentleman that served Sir Thomas Clifford - +Or him that was Sir Thomas--gave to me +For Mistress Julia. + +Julia. Give it me! + +[Throwing away the one she holds.] + +Wal. [Snatching it.] For what? +Wouldst read it? He's a bankrupt! stripped of title, +House, chattels, lands, and all! A naked bankrupt, +With neither purse, nor trust! Wouldst read his letter? +A beggar! Yea, a very beggar!--fasts, unless +He dines on alms! How durst he send thee a letter! +A fellow cut on this hand, and on that; +Bows and is cut again, and bows again! +Who pays you fifty smiles for half a one, - +And that given grudgingly! To you a letter! +I burst with choler! Thus I treat his letter! + +[Tears and throws it on the ground.] + +So! I was wrong to let him ruffle me; +He is not worth the spending anger on! +I prithee, Master Modus, use despatch, +And presently make ready for our ride. +You, Helen, to my Julia look--a change +Of dresses will suffice. She must have new ones, +Matches for her new state! Haste, friends. My Julia! +Why stand you poring there upon the ground? +Time flies. Your rise astounds you? Never heed - +You'll play my lady countess like a queen! + +[They go out.] + + + +ACT IV. + + + +SCENE I.--A Room in the Earl of Rochdale's + + +[Eater HELEN.] + +Helen. I'm weary wandering from room to room; +A castle after all is but a house - +The dullest one when lacking company. +Were I at home, I could be company +Unto myself. I see not Master Walter, +He's ever with his ward. I see not her. +By Master Walter's will she bides alone. +My father stops in town. I can't see him. +My cousin makes his books his company. +I'll go to bed and sleep. No--I'll stay up +And plague my cousin into making love! +For, that he loves me, shrewdly I suspect. +How dull he is that hath not sense to see +What lies before him, and he'd like to find! +I'll change my treatment of him. Cross him, where +Before I used to humour him. He comes, +Poring upon a book. What's that you read? + +[Enter MODUS.] + +Mod. Latin, sweet cousin. + +Helen. 'Tis a naughty tongue, +I fear, and teaches men to lie. + +Mod. To lie! + +Helen. You study it. You call your cousin sweet, +And treat her as you would a crab. As sour +'Twould seem you think her, as you covet her! +Why how the monster stares, and looks about! +You construe Latin, and can't construe that! + +Mod. I never studied women. + +Helen. No; nor men. +Else would you better know their ways: nor read +In presence of a lady. [Strikes the book from his hand.] + +Mod. Right you say, +And well you served me, cousin, so to strike +The volume from my hand. I own my fault; +So please you--may I pick it up again? +I'll put it in my pocket! + +Helen. Pick it up. +He fears me as I were his grandmother! +What is the book? + +Mod. 'Tis Ovid's Art of Love. + +Helen. That Ovid was a fool! + +Mod. In what? + +Helen. In that: +To call that thing an art, which art is none. + +Mod. And is not love an art? + +Helen. Are you a fool, +As well as Ovid? Love an art! No art +But taketh time and pains to learn. Love comes +With neither! Is't to hoard such grain as that, +You went to college? Better stay at home, +And study homely English. + +Mod. Nay, you know not +The argument. + +Helen. I don't? I know it better +Than ever Ovid did! The face--the form - +The heart--the mind we fancy, cousin; that's +The argument! Why, cousin, you know nothing. +Suppose a lady were in love with thee: +Couldst thou by Ovid, cousin, find it out? +Couldst find it out, wast thou in love thyself? +Could Ovid, cousin, teach thee to make love? +I could, that never read him! You begin +With melancholy; then to sadness; then +To sickness; then to dying--but not die! +She would not let thee, were she of my mind! +She'd take compassion on thee. Then for hope; +From hope to confidence; from confidence +To boldness;--then you'd speak; at first entreat; +Then urge; then flout; then argue; then enforce; +Make prisoner of her hand; besiege her waist; +Threaten her lips with storming; keep thy word +And carry her! My sampler 'gainst thy Ovid! +Why cousin, are you frightened, that you stand +As you were stricken dumb? The case is clear, +You are no soldier. You'll ne'er win a battle. +You care too much for blows! + +Mod. You wrong me there, +At school I was the champion of my form; +And since I went to college - + +Helen. That for college! + +Mod. Nay, hear me! + +Helen. Well? What, since you went to college? +You know what men are set down for, who boast +Of their own bravery! Go on, brave cousin: +What, since you went to college? Was there not +One Quentin Halworth there? You know there was, +And that he was your master! + +Mod. He my master! +Thrice was he worsted by me. + +Helen. Still was he +Your master. + +Mod. He allowed I had the best! +Allowed it, mark me! nor to me alone, +But twenty I could name. + +Helen. And mastered you +At last! Confess it, cousin, 'tis the truth! +A proctor's daughter you did both affect - +Look at me and deny it! Of the twain +She more affected you;--I've caught you now, +Bold cousin! Mark you? opportunity +On opportunity she gave you, sir - +Deny it if you can!--but though to others, +When you discoursed of her, you were a flame; +To her you were a wick that would not light, +Though held in the very fire! And so he won her - +Won her, because he wooed her like a man. +For all your cuffings, cuffing you again +With most usurious interest. Now, sir, +Protest that you are valiant! + +Mod. Cousin Helen! + +Helen. Well, sir? + +Mod. The tale is all a forgery! + +Helen. A forgery! + +Mod. From first to last; ne'er spoke I +To a proctor's daughter while I was at college. + +Helen. 'Twas a scrivener's then--or somebody's. +But what concerns it whose? +Enough, you loved her! +And, shame upon you, let another take her! + +Mod. Cousin, I'll tell you, if you'll only hear me, +I loved no woman while I was at college - +Save one, and her I fancied ere I went there. + +Helen. Indeed! Now I'll retreat, if he's advancing. +Comes he not on! O what a stock's the man! +Well, cousin? + +Mod. Well! What more wouldst have me say? +I think I've said enough. + +Helen. And so think I. +I did but jest with you. You are not angry? +Shake hands! Why, cousin, do you squeeze me so? + +Mod. [Letting her go.] I swear I squeezed you not. + +Helen. You did not? + +Mod. No. I'll die if I did! + +Helen. Why then you did not, cousin, +So let's shake hands again - +[He takes her hand as before.] O go and now +Read Ovid! Cousin, will you tell me one thing: +Wore lovers ruffs in Master Ovid's time? +Behoved him teach them, then, to put them on; - +And that you have to learn. Hold up your head! +Why, cousin, how you blush! Plague on the ruff! +I cannot give't a set. You're blushing still! +Why do you blush, dear cousin? So!--'twill beat me! +I'll give it up. + +Mod. Nay, prithee, don't--try on! + +Helen. And if I do, I fear you'll think me bold. + +Mod. For what? + +Helen. To trust my face so near to thine. + +Mod. I know not what you mean. + +Helen. I'm glad you don't! +Cousin, I own right well behaved you are, +Most marvellously well behaved! They've bred +You well at college. With another man +My lips would be in danger! Hang the ruff! + +Mod. Nay, give it up, nor plague thyself, dear cousin. + +Helen. Dear fool! [Throws the ruff on the ground.] +I swear the ruff is good for just +As little as its master! There!--'Tis spoiled - +You'll have to get another! Hie for it, +And wear it in the fashion of a wisp, +Ere I adjust it for thee! Farewell, cousin! +You'd need to study Ovid's Art of Love. + +[HELEN goes out.] + +Mod. [Solus.] Went she in anger! I will follow her, - +No, I will not! Heigho! I love my cousin! +O would that she loved me! Why did she taunt me +With backwardness in love? What could she mean? +Sees she I love her, and so laughs at me, +Because I lack the front to woo her? Nay, +I'll woo her then! Her lips shall be in danger, +When next she trusts them near me! Looked she at me +To-day as never did she look before! +A bold heart, Master Modus! 'Tis a saying +A faint one never won fair lady yet! +I'll woo my cousin, come what will on't. Yes: + +[Begins reading again, throws down the book.] + +Hang Ovid's Art of Love! I'll woo my cousin! + +[Goes out.] + + +SCENE II.--The Banqueting-room in the Earl of Rochdale's Mansion. + + +[Enter MASTER WALTER and JULIA.] + +Wal. This is the banqueting-room. Thou seest as far +It leaves the last behind, as that excels +The former ones. All is proportion here +And harmony! Observe! The massy pillars +May well look proud to bear the gilded dome. +You mark those full-length portraits? They're the heads, +The stately heads, of his ancestral line. +Here o'er the feast they haply still preside! +Mark those medallions! Stand they forth or not +In bold and fair relief? Is not this brave? + +Julia. [Abstractedly.] It is. + +Wal. It should be so. To cheer the blood +That flows in noble veins is made the feast +That gladdens here! You see this drapery? +'Tis richest velvet! Fringe and tassels, gold! +Is not this costly? + +Julia. Yes. + +Wal. And chaste, the while? +Both chaste and costly? + +Julia. Yes. + +Wal. Come hither! There's a mirror for you. See! +One sheet from floor to ceiling! Look into it, +Salute its mistress! Dost not know her? + +Julia. [Sighing deeply.] Yes. + +Wal. And sighest thou to know her? Wait until +To-morrow, when the banquet shall be spread +In the fair hall; the guests--already bid, +Around it; here, her lord; and there, herself; +Presiding o'er the cheer that hails him bridegroom, +And her the happy bride! Dost hear me? + +Julia. [Sighing still more deeply.] Yes. + +Wal. These are the day-rooms only, we have seen. +For public and domestic uses kept. +I'll show you now the lodging-rooms. + +[Goes, then turns and observes JULIA standing perfectly abstracted.] + +You're tired. +Let it be till after dinner, then. Yet one +I'd like thee much to see--the bridal chamber. + +[JULIA starts, crosses her hands upon her breast, and looks +upwards.] + +I see you're tired: yet it is worth the viewing, +If only for the tapestry which shows +The needle like the pencil glows with life; + +[Brings down chairs--they sit.] + +The story's of a page who loved the dame +He served--a princess!--Love's a heedless thing! +That never takes account of obstacles; +Makes plains of mountains, rivulets of seas, +That part it from its wish. So proved the page, +Who from a state so lowly, looked so high, - +But love's a greater lackwit still than this. +Say it aspires--that's gain! Love stoops--that's loss! +You know what comes. The princess loved the page. +Shall I go on, or here leave off? + +Julia. Go on. + +Wal. Each side of the chamber shows a different stage +Of this fond page, and fonder lady's love. {2} +First--no, it is not that. + +Julia. Oh, recollect! + +Wal. And yet it is. + +Julia. No doubt it is. What is 't? + +Wal. He holds to her a salver, with a cup; +His cheeks more mantling with his passion than +The cup with the ruby wine. She heeds him not, +For too great heed of him:- but seems to hold +Debate betwixt her passion and her pride - +That's like to lose the day. You read it in +Her vacant eye, knit brow, and parted lips, +Which speak a heart too busy all within +To note what's done without. Like you the tale? + +Julia. I list to every word. + +Wal. The next side paints +The page upon his knee. He has told his tale; +And found that when he lost his heart, he played +No losing game: but won a richer one! +There may you read in him, how love would seem +Most humble when most bold,--you question which +Appears to kiss her hand--his breath, or lips! +In her you read how wholly lost is she +Who trusts her heart to love. Shall I give o'er? + +Julia. Nay, tell it to the end. Is't melancholy? + +Wal. To answer that, would mar the story. + +Julia. Right. + +Wal. The third side now we come to. + +Julia. What shows that? + +Wal. The page and princess still. But stands her sire +Between them. Stern he grasps his daughter's arm, +Whose eyes like fountains play; while through her tears +Her passion shines, as through the fountain drops +The sun! His minions crowd around the page! +They drag him to a dungeon. + +Julia. Hapless youth! + +Wal. Hapless indeed, that's twice a captive! heart +And body both in bonds. But that's the chain, +Which balance cannot weigh, rule measure, touch +Define the texture of, or eye detect, +That's forged by the subtle craft of love! +No need to tell you that he wears it. Such +The cunning of the hand that plied the loom, +You've but to mark the straining of his eye, +To feel the coil yourself! + +Julia. I feel't without! +You've finished with the third side; now the fourth! + +Wal. It brings us to a dungeon, then. + +Julia. The page, +The thrall of love, more than the dungeon's thrall, +Is there? + +Wal. He is. He lies in fetters. + +Julia. Hard! +Hard as the steel, the hands that put them on. + +Wal. Some one unrivets them! + +Julia. The princess? 'Tis! + +Wal. It is another page. + +Julia. It is herself! + +Wal. Her skin is fair; and his is berry-brown. +His locks are raven black; and hers are gold. + +Julia. Love's cunning of disguises! spite of locks, +Skin, vesture,--it is she, and only she +What will not constant woman do for love +That's loved with constancy! Set her the task, +Virtue approving, that will baffle her! +O'ertax her stooping, patience, courage, wit! +My life upon it, 'tis the princess' self, +Transformed into a page! + +Wal. The dungeon door +Stands open, and you see beyond - + +Julia. Her father! + +Wal. No; a steed. + +Julia. [Starting up.] O, welcome steed, +My heart bounds at the thought of thee! Thou comest +To bear the page from bonds to liberty. +What else? + +Wal. [Rising.] The story's told. + +Julia. Too briefly told; +O happy princess, that had wealth and state +To lay them down for love! Whose constant love +Appearances approved, not falsified! +A winner in thy loss, as well as gain. + +Wal. Weighs love so much? + +Julia. What would you weigh 'gainst love +That's true? Tell me with what you'd turn the scale? +Yea, make the index waver? Wealth? A feather! +Rank? Tinsel against bullion in the balance! +The love of kindred? That to set 'gainst love! +Friendship comes nearest to't; but put it in, +Friendship will kick the beam!--weigh nothing 'gainst it! +Weigh love against the world! +Yet are they happy that have naught to say to it. + +Wal. And such a one art thou. Who wisely wed, +Wed happily. The love thou speak'st of, +A flower is only, that its season has, +Which they must look to see the withering of, +Who pleasure in its budding and its bloom! +But wisdom is the constant evergreen +Which lives the whole year through! Be that, your flower! + +[Enter a Servant.] + +Well? + +Serv. My lord's secretary is without. +He brings a letter for her ladyship, +And craves admittance to her. + +Wal. Show him in. + +Julia. No. + +Wal. Thou must see him. To show slight to him, +Were slighting him that sent him. Show him in! + +[Servant goes out.] + +Some errand proper for thy private ear, +Besides the letter he may bring. What mean +This paleness and this trembling? Mark me, Julia! +If, from these nuptials, which thyself invited - +Which at thy seeking came--thou wouldst be freed, +Thou hast gone too far! Receding were disgrace, +Sooner than see thee suffer which, the hearts +That love thee most would wish thee dead! Reflect! +Take thought! collect thyself! With dignity +Receive thy bridegroom's messenger! for sure +As dawns to-morrow's sun, to-morrow night +Sees thee a wedded bride! + +[Goes out.] + +Julia. [Alone.] A wedded bride! +Is it a dream? Is it a phantasm? 'Tis +Too horrible for reality! for aught else +Too palpable! O would it were a dream! +How would I bless the sun that waked me from it! +I perish! Like some desperate mariner +Impatient of a strange and hostile land, +Who rashly hoists his sail and puts to sea, +And being fast on reefs and quicksands borne, +Essays in vain once more to make the land, +Whence wind and current drive him; I'm wrecked +By mine own act! What! no escape? no hope? +None! I must e'en abide these hated nuptials! +Hated!--Ah! own it, and then curse thyself! +That madest the bane thou loathest--for the love +Thou bear'st to one who never can be thine! +Yes--love! Deceive thyself no longer. False +To say 'tis pity for his fall--respect, +Engendered by a hollow world's disdain, +Which hoots whom fickle fortune cheers no more! +'Tis none of these; 'tis love--and if not love, +Why then idolatry! Ay, that's the name +To speak the broadest, deepest, strongest passion, +That ever woman's heart was borne away by! +He comes! Thou'dst play the lady,--play it now! + +[Enter a Servant, conducting CLIFFORD, plainly attired as the EARL +OF ROCHDALE'S Secretary.] + +Servant. His lordship's secretary. + +[Servant goes out.] + +Julia. Speaks he not? Or does he wait for orders to unfold +His business? Stopped his business till I spoke, +I'd hold my peace for ever! + +[CLIFFORD kneels; presenting a letter.] + +Does he kneel? +A lady am I to my heart's content! +Could he unmake me that which claims his knee, +I'd kneel to him--I would! I would!--Your will? + +Clif. This letter from my lord. + +Julia. O fate! Who speaks? + +Clif. The secretary of my lord. + +Julia. I breathe! +I could have sworn 'twas he! + +[Makes an effort to look at him, but is unable.] + +So like the voice - +I dare not look, lest there the form should stand! +How came he by that voice? 'Tis Clifford's voice, +If ever Clifford spoke! My fears come back - +Clifford the secretary of my lord! +Fortune hath freaks, but none so mad as that! +It cannot be!--It should not be!--A look, +And all were set at rest. + +[Tries to look at him again, but cannot.] + +So strong my fears, +Dread to confirm them takes away the power +To try and end them! Come the worst, I'll look. + +[She tries again; and again is unequal to the task.] + +I'd sink before him if I met his eye! + +Clif. Will't please your ladyship to take the letter? +Julia. There Clifford speaks again! Not Clifford's heart +Could more make Clifford's voice! Not Clifford's tongue +And lips more frame it into Clifford's speech! +A question, and 'tis over! Know I you? + +Clif. Reverse of fortune, lady, changes friends; +It turns them into strangers. What I am +I have not always been! + +Julia. Could I not name you? + +Clif. If your disdain for one, perhaps too bold +When hollow fortune called him favourite, - +Now by her fickleness perforce reduced +To take an humble tone, would suffer you - + +Julia. I might? + +Clif. You might! + +Julia. Oh, Clifford! is it you? + +Clif. Your answer to my lord. + +[Gives the letter.] + +Julia. Your lord! + +[Mechanically taking it.] + +Clif. Wilt write it? +Or, will it please you send a verbal one? +I'll bear it faithfully. + +Julia. You'll bear it? + +Clif. Madam, +Your pardon, but my haste is somewhat urgent. +My lord's impatient, and to use despatch +Were his repeated orders. + +Julia. Orders? Well, +I'll read the letter, sir. 'Tis right you mind +His lordship's orders. They are paramount! +Nothing should supersede them!--stand beside them! +They merit all your care, and have it! Fit, +Most fit, they should! Give me the letter, sir. + +Clif. You have it, madam. + +Julia. So! How poor a thing +I look! so lost, while he is all himself! +Have I no pride? + +[She rings, the Servant enters.] + +Paper, and pen, and ink! +If he can freeze, 'tis time that I grow cold! +I'll read the letter. + +[Opens it, and holds it as about to read it.] + +Mind his orders! So! +Quickly he fits his habits to his fortunes! +He serves my lord with all his will! His heart's +In his vocation. So! Is this the letter? +'Tis upside down--and here I'm poring on't! +Most fit I let him see me play the fool! +Shame! Let me be myself! + +[A Servant enters with materials for writing.] + +A table, sir, +And chair. + +[The Servant brings a table and chair, and goes out. She sits a +while, vacantly gazing on the letter--then looks at CLIFFORD.] + +How plainly shows his humble suit! +It fits not him that wears it! I have wronged him! +He can't be happy--does not look it!--is not. +That eye which reads the ground is argument +Enough! He loves me. There I let him stand, +And I am sitting! + +[Rises, takes a chair, and approaches CLIFFORD.] + +Pray you take a chair. + +[He bows, as acknowledging and declining the honour. She looks at +him a while.] + +Clifford, why don't you speak to me? + +[She weeps.] + +Clif. I trust +You're happy. + +Julia. Happy! Very, very happy! +You see I weep, I am so happy! Tears +Are signs, you know, of naught but happiness! +When first I saw you, little did I look +To be so happy!--Clifford! + +Clif. Madam? + +Julia. Madam! +I call thee Clifford, and thou call'st me madam! + +Clif. Such the address my duty stints me to. +Thou art the wife elect of a proud Earl, +Whose humble secretary, sole, am I. + +Julia. Most right! I had forgot! I thank you, sir, +For so reminding me; and give you joy, +That what, I see, had been a burthen to you, +Is fairly off your hands. + +Clif. A burthen to me! +Mean you yourself? Are you that burthen, Julia? +Say that the sun's a burthen to the earth! +Say that the blood's a burthen to the heart! +Say health's a burthen, peace, contentment, joy, +Fame, riches, honours! everything that man +Desires, and gives the name of blessing to +E'en such a burthen, Julia were to me, +Had fortune let me wear her. + +Julia. [Aside.] On the brink +Of what a precipice I'm standing! Back, +Back! while the faculty remains to do't! +A minute longer, not the whirlpool's self +More sure to suck me down! One effort! There! + +[She returns to her seat, recovers her self-possession, takes up the +letter, and reads.] + +To wed to-morrow night! Wed whom? A man +Whom I can never love! I should before +Have thought of that. To-morrow night! This hour +To-morrow! How I tremble! Happy bands +To which my heart such freezing welcome gives, +As sends an ague through me! At what means +Will not the desperate snatch! What's honour's price? +Nor friends, nor lovers,--no, nor life itself! +Clifford! This moment leave me! + +[CLIFFORD retires up the stage out of JULIA'S sight.] + +Is he gone? +O docile lover! Do his mistress' wish +That went against his own! Do it so soon +Ere well 'twas uttered! No good-bye to her! +No word! no look! 'Twas best that he so went! +Alas, the strait of her, who owns that best, +Which last she'd wish were done? What's left me now? +To weep! To weep! + +[Leans her head upon her arm, which rests upon the desk,--her other +arm hanging listlessly at her side. CLIFFORD comes down the stage, +looks a moment at her, approaches her, and kneeling, takes her +hand.] + +Clif. My Julia! + +Julia. Here again! +Up! up! By all thy hopes of Heaven, go hence! +To stay's perdition to me! Look you, Clifford! +Were there a grave where thou art kneeling now, +I'd walk into 't, and be inearthed alive, +Ere taint should touch my name! Should some one come +And see thee kneeling thus! Let go my hand! +Remember, Clifford, I'm a promised bride - +And take thy arm away! It has no right +To clasp my waist! Judge you so poorly of me, +As think I'll suffer this? My honour, sir! + +[She breaks from him, quitting her seat.] + +I'm glad you've forced me to respect myself - +You'll find that I can do so! + +Clif. I was bold - +Forgetful of your station and my own; +There was a time I held your hand unchid! +There was a time I might have clasped your waist - +I had forgot that time was past and gone! +I pray you, pardon me! + +Julia. [Softened.] I do so, Clifford. + +Clif. I shall no more offend. + +Julia. Make sure of that. +No longer is it fit thou keep'st thy post +In's lordship's household. Give it up! A day - +An hour remain not in it! + +Clif. Wherefore? + +Julia. Live +In the same house with me, and I another's? +Put miles, put leagues between us! The same land +Should not contain us. Oceans should divide us - +With barriers of constant tempests--such +As mariners durst not tempt! O Clifford! +Rash was the act so light that gave me up, +That stung a woman's pride, and drove her mad - +Till in her frenzy she destroyed her peace! +Oh, it was rashly done! Had you reproved - +Expostulated,--had you reasoned with me - +Tried to find out what was indeed my heart, - +I would have shown it--you'd have seen it. All +Had been as naught can ever be again! + +Clif. Lovest thou me, Julia? + +Julia. Dost thou ask me, Clifford? + +Clif. These nuptials may be shunned! - + +Julia. With honour? + +Clif. Yes! + +Julia. Then take me!--Stop--hear me, and take me then! +Let not thy passion be my counsellor! +Deal with me, Clifford, as my brother. Be +The jealous guardian of my spotless name! +Scan thou my cause as 'twere thy sister's. Let +Thy scrutiny o'erlook no point of it, - +Nor turn it over once, but many a time:- +That flaw, speck--yea,--the shade of one,--a soil +So slight, not one out of a thousand eyes +Could find it out, may not escape thee; then +Say if these nuptials can be shunned with honour! + +Clif. They can. + +Julia. Then take me, Clifford! [They embrace.] + +Wal. [Entering.] Ha! What's this? +Ha! treason! What! my baronet that was, +My secretary now? Your servant, sir! +Is't thus you do the pleasure of your lord, - +That for your service feeds you, clothes you, pays you! +Or takest thou but the name of his dependent? +What's here?--a letter. Fifty crowns to one +A forgery! I'm wrong. It is his hand. +This proves thee double traitor! + +Clif. Traitor! + +Julia. Nay, +Control thy wrath, good Master Walter! Do - +And I'll persuade him to go hence - + +[MASTER WALTER retires up the stage.] I see +For me thou bearest this, and thank thee, Clifford! +As thou hast truly shown thy heart to me, +So truly I to thee have opened mine! +Time flies! To-morrow! If thy love can find +A way, such as thou saidst, for my enlargement +By any means thou canst, apprise me of it; +And, soon as shown, I'll take it. + +Wal. Is he gone? + +Julia. He is this moment. If thou covetest me, +Win me, and wear me! May I trust thee? Oh! +If that's thy soul, that's looking through thine eyes, +Thou lovest me, and I may!--I sicken, lest +I never see thee more + +Clif. As life is mine, +The ring that on thy wedding-finger goes +No hand but mine shall place there! + +Wal. Lingers he? + +Julia. For my sake, now away! And yet a word. +By all thy hopes most dear, be true to me! +Go now!--yet stay! Clifford, while you are here, +I'm like a bark distressed and compassless, +That by a beacon steers; when you're away, +That bark alone and tossing miles at sea! +Now go! Farewell! My compass--beacon--land! +When shall my eyes be blessed with thee again! + +Clif. Farewell! [Goes out.] + +Julia. Art gone? All's chance--all's care--all's darkness. + +[Is led off by MASTER WALTER.] + + + +ACT V. + + + +SCENE I.--An Apartment in the Earl of Rochdale's. + + +[Enter HELEN and FATHOM.] + +Fath. The long and short of it is this--if she marries this lord, +she'll break her heart! I wish you could see her, madam. Poor +lady! + +Helen. How looks she, prithee? + +Fath. Marry, for all the world like a dripping-wet cambric +handkerchief! She has no colour nor strength in her; and does +nothing but weep--poor lady! + +Helen. Tell me again what said she to thee? + +Fath. She offered me all she was mistress of to take the letter to +Master Clifford. She drew her purse from her pocket--the ring from +her finger--she took her very earrings out of her ears--but I was +forbidden, and refused. And now I'm sorry for it! Poor lady! + +Helen. Thou shouldst be sorry. Thou hast a hard heart, Fathom. + +Fath. I, madam! My heart is as soft as a woman's. You should have +seen me when I came out of her chamber--poor lady! + +Helen. Did you cry? + +Fath. No; but I was as near it as possible. I a hard heart! I +would do anything to serve her, poor sweet lady! + +Helen. Will you take her letter, asks she you again? + +Fath. No--I am forbid. + +Helen. Will you help Master Clifford to an interview with her? + +Fath. No--Master Walter would find it out. + +Helen. Will you contrive to get me into her chamber? + +Fath. No--you would be sure to bring me into mischief. + +Helen. Go to! You would do nothing to serve her. You a soft +heart! You have no heart at all! You feel not for her! + +Fath. But I tell you I do--and good right I have to feel for her. +I have been in love myself. + +Helen. With your dinner! + +Fath. I would it had been! My pain would soon have been over, and +at little cost. A fortune I squandered upon her!--trinkets-- +trimmings--treatings--what swallowed up the revenue of a whole year! +Wasn't I in love? Six months I courted her, and a dozen crowns all +but one did I disburse for her in that time! Wasn't I in love? An +hostler--a tapster--and a constable, courted her at the same time, +and I offered to cudgel the whole three of them for her! Wasn't I +in love? + +Helen. You are a valiant man, Fathom. + +Fath. Am not I? Walks not the earth the man I am afraid of. + +Helen. Fear you not Master Walter? + +Fath. No. + +Helen. You do! + +Fath. I don't! + +Helen. I'll prove it to you. You see him breaking your young +mistress's heart, and have not the manhood to stand by her. + +Fath. What could I do for her? + +Helen. Let her out of prison. It were the act of a man. + +Fath. That man am I! + +Helen. Well said, brave Fathom! + +Fath. But my place! + +Helen. I'll provide thee with a better one. + +Fath. 'Tis a capital place! So little to do, and so much to get +for't. Six pounds in the year; two suits of livery; shoes and +stockings, and a famous larder. He'd be a bold man that would put +such a place in jeopardy. My place, madam, my place! + +Helen. I tell thee I'll provide thee with a better place. Thou +shalt have less to do, and more to get. Now, Fathom, hast thou +courage to stand by thy mistress? + +Fath. I have! + +Helen. That's right. + +Fath. I'll let my lady out. + +[Enter MASTER WALTER unperceived.] + +Helen. That's right. When, Fathom? + +Fath. To-night. + +Helen. She is to be married to-night. + +Fath. This evening, then. Master Walter is now in the library, the +key is on the outside, and I'll lock him in. + +Helen. Excellent! You'll do it? + +Fath. Rely upon it. How he'll stare when he finds himself a +prisoner, and my young lady at liberty! + +Helen. Most excellent! You'll be sure to do it? + +Fath. Depend upon me! When Fathom undertakes a thing, he defies +fire and water - + +Wal. [Coming forward.] Fathom! + +Fath. Sir! + +Wal. Assemble straight the servants. + +Fath. Yes, sir! + +Wal. Mind, +And have them in the hall when I come down. + +Fath. Yes, sir! + +Wal. And see you do not stir a step, +But where I order you. + +Fath. Not an inch, sir! + +Wal. See that you don't--away! So, my fair mistress, + +[FATHOM goes out.] + +What's this you have been plotting? An escape +For mistress Julia? + +Helen. I avow it. + +Wal. Do you? + +Helen. Yes; and moreover to your face I tell you, +Most hardly do you use her! + +Wal. Verily! + +Helen. I wonder where's her spirit! Had she mine +She would not take 't so easily. Do you mean +To force this marriage on her? + +Wal. With your leave. + +Helen. You laugh. + +Wal. Without it, then. I don't laugh now. + +Helen. If I were she, I'd find a way to escape. + +Wal. What would you do? + +Helen. I'd leap out of the window! + +Wal. Your window should be barred. + +Helen. I'd cheat you still! - +I'd hang myself ere I'd be forced to marry! + +Wal. Well said! You shall be married, then, tonight. + +Helen. Married to-night! + +Wal. As sure as I have said it. + +Helen. Two words to that. Pray who's to be my bridegroom? + +Wal. A daughter's husband is her father's choice. + +Helen. My father's daughter ne'er shall wed such husband! + +Wal. Indeed! + +Helen. I'll pick a husband for myself. + +Wal. Indeed! + +Helen. Indeed, sir; and indeed again! + +Wal. Go dress you for the marriage ceremony. + +Helen. But, Master Walter, what is it you mean? + +[Enter MODUS.] + +Wal. Here comes your cousin;--he shall be your bridesman! +The thought's a sudden one,--that will excuse +Defect in your appointments. A plain dress, - +So 'tis of white,--will do. + +Helen. I'll dress in black. +I'll quit the castle. + +Wal. That you shall not do. +Its doors are guarded by my lord's domestics, +Its avenues--its grounds. What you must do, +Do with a good grace! In an hour, or less, +Your father will be here. Make up your mind +To take with thankfulness the man he gives you. +Now, [Aside] if they find not out how beat their hearts, +I have no skill, not I, in feeling pulses. + +[Goes out.] + +Helen. Why, cousin Modus! What! will you stand by +And see me forced to marry? Cousin Modus! +Have you not got a tongue? Have you not eyes? +Do you not see I'm very--very ill, +And not a chair in all the corridor? + +Mod. I'll find one in the study. + +Helen. Hang the study! + +Mod. My room's at hand. I'll fetch one thence. + +Helen. You shan't +I'd faint ere you came back! + +Mod. What shall I do? + +Helen. Why don't you offer to support me? Well? +Give me your arm--be quick! [MODUS offers his arm.] +Is that the way +To help a lady when she's like to faint? +I'll drop unless you catch me! [MODUS supports her.] +That will do. +I'm better now--[MODUS offers to leave her] don't leave me! Is one +well +Because one's better? Hold my hand. Keep so. +I'll soon recover so you move not. Loves he - + +[Aside.] + +Which I'll be sworn he does, he'll own it now. +Well, cousin Modus? + +Mod. Well, sweet cousin! + +Helen. Well? +You heard what Master Walter said? + +Mod. I did. + +Helen. And would you have me marry? Can't you speak? +Say yes or no. + +Mod. No, cousin! + +Helen. Bravely said! +And why, my gallant cousin? + +Mod. Why? + +Helen. Ay, why? - +Women, you know, are fond of reasons--why +Would you not have me marry? How you blush! +Is it because you do not know the reason? +You mind me of a story of a cousin +Who once her cousin such a question asked. +He had not been to college, though--for books, +Had passed his time in reading ladies' eyes. +Which he could construe marvellously well, +Though writ in language all symbolical. +Thus stood they once together, on a day - +As we stand now--discoursed as we discourse, - +But with this difference,--fifty gentle words +He spoke to her, for one she spoke to him! - +What a dear cousin! Well, as I did say, +As now I questioned thee, she questioned him. +And what was his reply? To think of it +Sets my heart beating--'twas so kind a one! +So like a cousin's answer--a dear cousin! +A gentle, honest, gallant, loving cousin! +What did he say?--A man might find it out, +Though never read he Ovid's Art of Love - +What did he say? He'd marry her himself! +How stupid are you, cousin! Let me go! + +Mod. You are not well yet? + +Helen. Yes. + +Mod. I'm sure you're not. + +Helen. I'm sure I am. + +Mod. Nay, let me hold you, cousin! I like it. + +Helen. Do you? I would wager you +You could not tell me why you like it. Well? +You see how true I know you! How you stare! +What see you in my face to wonder at? + +Mod. A pair of eyes! + +Helen. At last he'll find his tongue--[Aside.] +And saw you ne'er a pair of eyes before? + +Mod. Not such a pair. + +Helen. And why? + +Mod. They are so bright! +You have a Grecian nose. + +Helen. Indeed. + +Mod. Indeed! + +Helen. What kind of mouth have I? + +Mod. A handsome one. I never saw so sweet a pair of lips! +I ne'er saw lips at all till now, dear cousin! + +Helen. Cousin, I'm well,--you need not hold me now. +Do you not hear? I tell you I am well! +I need your arm no longer--take 't away! +So tight it locks me, 'tis with pain I breathe! +Let me go, cousin! Wherefore do you hold +Your face so close to mine? What do you mean? + +Mod. You've questioned me, and now I'll question you. + +Helen. What would you learn? + +Mod. The use of lips. + +Helen. To speak. + +Mod. Naught else? + +Helen. How bold my modest cousin grows! +Why, other use know you? + +Mod. I do! + +Helen. Indeed! +You're wondrous wise? And pray what is it? + +Mod. This! [Attempts to kiss her.] + +Helen. Soft! my hand thanks you, cousin--for my lips +I keep them for a husband!--Nay, stand off! +I'll not be held in manacles again! +Why do you follow me? + +Mod. I love you, cousin! + +Helen. O cousin, say you so! That's passing strange! +Falls out most crossly--is a dire mishap - +A thing to sigh for, weep for, languish for, +And die for! + +Mod. Die for! + +Helen, Yes, with laughter, cousin, +For, cousin, I love you! + +Mod. And you'll be mine? + +Helen. I will. + +Mod. Your hand upon it. + +Helen. Hand and heart. +Hie to thy dressing-room, and I'll to mine - +Attire thee for the altar--so will I. +Whoe'er may claim me, thou'rt the man shall have me. +Away! Despatch! But hark you, ere you go, +Ne'er brag of reading Ovid's Art of Love! + +Mod. And cousin! stop--one little word with you! + +[She returns, he snatches a kiss--They go out severally.] + + +SCENE II.--Julia's Chamber. + + +[Enter JULIA.] + +Julia. No word from him, and evening now set in! +He cannot play me false! His messenger +Is dogged--or letter intercepted. I'm +Beset with spies!--No rescue!--No escape! - +The hour at hand that brings my bridegroom home! +No relative to aid me! friend to counsel me. + +[A knock at the door.] + +Come in. + +[Enter two Female Attendants.] + +Your will? + +First Attendant. Your toilet waits, my lady; +'Tis time you dress. + +Julia. 'Tis time I die! [A peal of bells.] What's that? + +First Attendant. Your wedding bells, my lady. + +Julia. Merrily +They ring my knell! +[Second Attendant presents an open case.] +And pray you what are these? + +Second Attendant. Your wedding jewels. + +Julia. Set them by. + +Second Attendant. Indeed. +Was ne'er a braver set! A necklace, brooch, +And earrings all of brilliants, with a hoop +To guard your wedding ring. + +Julia. 'Twould need a guard +That lacks a heart to keep it! + +Second Attendant. Here's a heart +Suspended from the necklace--one huge diamond +Imbedded in a host of smaller ones! +Oh! how it sparkles! + +Julia. Show it me! Bright heart, +Thy lustre, should I wear thee, will be false, - +For thou the emblem art of love and truth, - +From her that wears thee unto him that gives thee. +Back to thy case! Better thou ne'er shouldst leave it - +Better thy gems a thousand fathoms deep +In their native mine again, than grace my neck, +And lend thy fair face to palm off a lie! + +First Attendant. Will't please you dress? + +Julia. Ah! in infected clothes +New from a pest-house! Leave me! If I dress, +I dress alone! O for a friend! Time gallops! + +[Attendants go out.] + +He that should guard me is mine enemy! +Constrains me to abide the fatal die, +My rashness, not my reason cast! He comes, +That will exact the forfeit!--Must I pay it? - +E'en at the cost of utter bankruptcy! +What's to be done? Pronounce the vow that parts +My body from my soul! To what it loathes +Links that, while this is linked to what it loves! +Condemned to such perdition! What's to be done? +Stand at the altar in an hour from this! +An hour thence seated at his board--a wife +Thence!--frenzy's in the thought! What's to be done? + +[Enter MASTER WALTER.] + +Wal. What! run the waves so high? Not ready yet! +Your lord will soon be here! The guests collect. + +Julia. Show me some way to 'scape these nuptials! Do it! +Some opening for avoidance or escape, - +Or to thy charge I'll lay a broken heart! +It may be, broken vows, and blasted honour, +Or else a mind distraught! + +Wal. What's this? + +Julia. The strait +I'm fallen into my patience cannot bear. +It frights my reason--warps my sense of virtue! +Religion!--changes me into a thing +I look at with abhorring! + +Wal. Listen to me. + +Julia. Listen to me! If this contract +Thou holdest me to--abide thou the result! +Answer to heaven for what I suffer!--act! +Prepare thyself for such calamity +To fall on me, and those whose evil stars +Have linked them with me, as no past mishap, +However rare, and marvellously sad +Can parallel! lay thy account to live +A smileless life, die an unpitied death - +Abhorred, abandoned of thy kind,--as one +Who had the guarding of a young maid's peace, - +Looked on and saw her rashly peril it; +And when she saw her danger, and confessed +Her fault, compelled her to complete her ruin! + +Wal. Hast done? + +Julia. Another moment, and I have. +Be warned! Beware how you abandon me +To myself! I'm young, rash, inexperienced! tempted +By most insufferable misery! +Bold, desperate, and reckless! Thou hast age +Experience, wisdom, and collectedness, - +Power, freedom,--everything that I have not, +Yet want, as none e'er wanted! Thou canst save me, +Thou oughtst! thou must! I tell thee at his feet +I'll fall a corse--ere mount his bridal bed! +So choose betwixt my rescue and my grave; - +And quickly too! The hour of sacrifice +Is near! Anon the immolating priest +Will summon me! Devise some speedy means +To cheat the altar of its victim. Do it! +Nor leave the task to me! + +Wal. Hast done? + +Julia. I have. + +Wal. Then list to me--and silently, if not +With patience.--[Brings chairs for himself and her.] +How I watched thee from thy childhood +I'll not recall to thee. Thy father's wisdom - +Whose humble instrument I was--directed +Your nonage should be passed in privacy, +From your apt mind that far outstripped your years, +Fearing the taint of an infected world; - +For, in the rich grounds, weeds once taking root, +Grow strong as flowers. He might be right or wrong! +I thought him right; and therefore did his bidding. +Most certainly he loved you--so did I; +Ay! well as I had been myself your father! + +[His hand is resting upon his knee, JULIA attempts to take it--he +withdraws it--looks at her--she hangs her head.] + +Well; you may take my hand! I need not say +How fast you grew in knowledge, and in goodness, - +That hope could scarce enjoy its golden dreams +So soon fulfilment realised them all! +Enough. You came to womanhood. Your heart, +Pure as the leaf of the consummate bud, +That's new unfolded by the smiling sun, +And ne'er knew blight nor canker! + +[JULIA attempts to place her other hand on his shoulder--he leans +from her--looks at her--she hangs her head again.] + +Put it there! +Where left I off? I know! When a good woman +Is fitly mated, she grows doubly good, +How good soe'er before! I found the man +I thought a match for thee; and, soon as found, +Proposed him to thee. 'Twas your father's will, +Occasion offering, you should be married +Soon as you reached to womanhood.--You liked +My choice, accepted him.--We came to town; +Where, by important matter summoned thence, +I left you an affianced bride! + +Julia. You did! +You did! [Leans her head upon her hand and weeps.] + +Wal. Nay, check thy tears! Let judgment now, +Not passion, be awake. On my return, +I found thee--what? I'll not describe the thing +I found thee then! I'll not describe my pangs +To see thee such a thing! The engineer +Who lays the last stone of his sea-built tower, +It cost him years and years of toil to raise - +And, smiling at it, tells the winds and waves +To roar and whistle now--but, in a night, +Beholds the tempest sporting in its place - +May look aghast, as I did! + +Julia. [Falling on her knees.] Pardon me! +Forgive me! pity me! + +Wal. Resume thy seat. [Raises her.] +I pity thee; perhaps not thee alone +It fits to sue for pardon. + +Julia. Me alone! +None other! + +Wal. But to vindicate myself, +I name thy lover's stern desertion of thee. +What wast thou then with wounded pride? A thing +To leap into a torrent! throw itself +From a precipice! rush into a fire! I saw +Thy madness--knew to thwart it were to chafe it - +And humoured it to take that course, I thought, +Adopted, least 'twould rue! + +Julia. 'Twas wisely done. + +Wal. At least 'twas for the best. + +Julia. To blame thee for it +Was adding shame to shame! But Master Walter, +These nuptials!--must they needs go on? + +Servant. [Entering.] More guests +Arrive. + +Wal. Attend to them. [Servant goes out.] + +Julia. Dear Master Walter! +Is there no way to escape these nuptials? + +Wal. Know'st not +What with these nuptials comes? Hast thou forgot? + +Julia. What? + +Wal. Nothing!--I did tell thee of a thing. + +Julia. What was it? + +Wal. To forget it was a fault! +Look back and think. + +Julia. I can't remember it. + +Wal. Fathers, make straws your children! Nature's nothing, +Blood nothing! Once in other veins it runs, +It no more yearneth for the parent flood, +Than doth the stream that from the source disparts. +Talk not of love instinctive--what you call so +Is but the brat of custom! Your own flesh +By habit cleaves to you--without, +Hath no adhesion. [Aside.] So; you have forgot +You have a father, and are here to meet him! + +Julia. I'll not deny it. + +Wal. You should blush for't. + +Julia. No! +No! no: hear, Master Walter! what's a father +That you've not been to me? Nay, turn not from me, +For at the name a holy awe I own, +That now almost inclines my knee to earth! +But thou to me, except a father's name, +Hast all the father been: the care--the love - +The guidance--the protection of a father. +Canst wonder, then, if like thy child I feel, - +And feeling so, that father's claim forget +Whom ne'er I knew save by the name of one? +Oh, turn to me, and do not chide me! or +If thou wilt chide, chide on! but turn to me! + +Wal. [Struggling with emotion.] My Julia! +[Embraces her.] + +Julia. Now, dear Master Walter, hear me! +Is there no way to 'scape these nuptials? + +Wal. Julia, +A promise made admits not of release, +Save by consent or forfeiture of those +Who hold it--so it should be pondered well +Before we let it go. Ere man should say +I broke the word I had the power to keep, +I'd lose the life I had the power to part with! +Remember, Julia, thou and I to-day +Must, to thy father, of thy training render +A strict account. While honour's left to us, +We have something--nothing, having all but that. +Now for thy last act of obedience, Julia! +Present thyself before thy bridegroom! [She assents.] Good! +My Julia's now herself! Show him thy heart, +And to his honour leave't to set thee free +Or hold thee bound. Thy father will be by! + + +SCENE III.--The Banqueting' Room. + + +[Enter MASTER WALTER and MASTER HEARTWELL.] + +Heart. Thanks, Master Walter! Ne'er was child more bent +To do her father's will, you'll own, than mine: +Yet never one more froward. + +Wal. All runs fair - +Fair may all end! To-day you'll learn the cause +That took me out of town. But soft a while, - +Here comes the bridegroom, with his friends, and here +The all-obedient bride. + +[Enter on one hand JULIA, and on the other hand LORD ROCHDALE with +LORD TINSEL and friends--afterwards CLIFFORD.] + +Roch. Is she not fair? + +Tin. She'll do. Your servant, lady! Master Walter, +We're glad to see you. Sirs, you're welcome all. +What wait they for? Are we to wed or not? +We're ready--why don't they present the bride? +I hope they know she is to wed an earl. + +Roch. Should I speak first? + +Tin. Not for your coronet! +I, as your friend, may make the first advance. +We've come here to be married. Where's the bride? + +Wal. There stands she, lord; if 'tis her will to wed, +His lordship's free to take her. + +Tin. Not a step! +I, as your friend, may lead her to your lordship. +Fair lady, by your leave. + +Julia. No! not to you. + +Tin. I ask your hand to give it to his lordship. + +Julia. Nor to his lordship--save he will accept +My hand without my heart! but I'll present +My knee to him, and, by his lofty rank, +Implore him now to do a lofty deed +Will lift its stately head above his rank, - +Assert him nobler yet in worth than name, - +And, in the place of an unwilling bride, +Unto a willing debt or make him lord, - +Whose thanks shall be his vassals, night and day +That still shall wait upon him! + +Tin. What means this? + +Julia. What is't behoves a wife to bring her lord? + +Wal. A whole heart, and a true one. + +Julia. I have none! +Not half a heart--the fraction of a heart! +Am I a woman it befits to wed? + +Wal. Why, where's thy heart? + +Julia. Gone--out of my keeping! +Lost, past recovery: right and title to it - +And all given up! and he that's owner on't, +So fit to wear it, were it fifty hearts, +I'd give it to him all! + +Wal. Thou dost not mean +His lordship's secretary? + +Julia. Yes. Away +Disguises! in that secretary know +The master of the heart, of which the poor, +Unvalued, empty casket, at your feet - +Its jewel gone--I now despairing throw! + +[Kneels.] + +Of his lord's bride he's lord! lord paramount! +To whom her virgin homage first she paid, - +'Gainst whom rebelled in frowardness alone, +Nor knew herself how loyal to him, till +Another claimed her duty--then awoke +To sense of all she owed him--all his worth - +And all her undeservings! + +Tin. Lady, we came not here to treat of hearts, - +But marriage; which, so please you, is with us +A simple joining, by the priest, of hands. +A ring's put on, a prayer or two is said; +You're man and wife,--and nothing more! For hearts, +We oftener do without, than with them, lady! + +Clif. So does not wed this lady! + +Tin. Who are you? + +Clif. I'm secretary to the Earl of Rochdale. + +Tin. My lord! + +Roch. I know him not - + +Tin. I know him now - +Your lordship's rival! Once Sir Thomas Clifford. + +Clif. Yes, and the bridegroom of that lady then, +Then loved her--loves her still! + +Julia. Was loved by her - +Though then she knew it not!--is loved by her, +As now she knows, and all the world may know! + +Tin. We can't be laughed at. We are here to wed, +And shall fulfil our contract. + +Julia. Clifford! + +Clif. Julia! +You will not give your hand? + +[A pause. JULIA seems utterly lost.] + +Wal. You have forgot +Again. You have a father! + +Julia. Bring him now, - +To see thy Julia justify thy training, +And lay her life down to redeem her word! + +Wal. And so redeems her all! Is it your will, +My lord, these nuptials should go on? + +Roch. It is. + +Wal. Then is it mine they stop! + +Tin. I told your lordship +You should not keep a Hunchback for your agent. + +Wal. Thought like my father, my good lord, who said +He would not have a Hunchback for his son - +So do I pardon you the savage slight. +My lord, that I am not as straight as you, +Was blemish neither of my thought nor will, +My head nor heart. It was no act of mine. - +Yet did it curdle Nature's kindly milk +E'en where 'tis richest--in a parent's breast - +To cast me out to heartless fosterage, +Nor heartless always, as it proved--and give +My portion to another! the same blood - +But I'll be sworn, in vein, my lord, and soul - +Although his trunk did swerve no more than yours - +Not half so straight as I. + +Tin. Upon my life +You've got a modest agent, Rochdale! Now +He'll prove himself descended--mark my words - +From some small gentleman + +Wal. And so you thought, +Where Nature played the churl, it would be fit +That fortune played it too. You would have had +My lord absolve me of my agency! +Fair lord, the flaw did cost me fifty times - +A hundred times my agency:- but all's +Recovered. Look, my lord, a testament +To make a pension of his lordship's rent-roll! +It is my father's, and was left by him, +In case his heir should die without a son, +Then to be opened. Heaven did send a son +To bless the heir. Heaven took its gift away, +He died--his father died. And Master Walter - +The unsightly agent of his lordship there - +The Hunchback whom your lordship would have stripped +Of his agency--is now the Earl of Rochdale! + +Tin. We've made a small mistake here. Never mind, +'Tis nothing in a lord. + +Julia. The Earl of Rochdale! + +Wal. And what of that? Thou know'st not half my greatness! +A prouder title, Julia, have I yet, +Sooner than part with which I'd give that up, +And be again plain Master Walter. What! +Dost thou not apprehend me? Yes, thou dost! +Command thyself; don't gasp. My pupil--daughter! +Come to thy father's heart! + +[JULIA rushes into his arms.] + +[Enter FATHOM.] + +Fath. Thievery! Elopement--escape--arrest! + +Wal. What's the matter? + +Fath. Mistress Helen is running away with Master Modus--Master +Modus is running away with Mistress Helen--but we have caught them, +secured them, and here they come, to receive the reward of their +merits. + +[Enter HELEN and MODUS, followed by Servants.] + +Helen. I'll ne'er wed man, if not my cousin Modus. + +Mod. Nor woman I, save cousin Helen's she. + +Wal. [To MASTER HEARTWELL.] A daughter, have you, and a nephew, +too, +Without their match in duty! Let them marry. +For you, sir, who to-day have lost an earldom, +Yet would have shared that earldom with my child - +My only one--content yourself with prospect +Of the succession; it must fall to you, +And fit yourself to grace it. Ape not those +Who rank by pride. The man of simplest bearing +Is yet a lord, when he's a lord indeed! + +Tin. The paradox is obsolete. Ne'er heed! +Learn from his book, and practise out of mine! + +Wal. Sir Thomas Clifford, take my daughter's hand! +If now you know the master of her heart! +Give it, my Julia! You suspect, I see, +And rightly, there has been some masking here. +Content thee, daughter, thou shalt know anon, +How jealousy of my mis-shapen back +Made me mistrustful of a child's affections - +Who doubted e'en a wife's--so that I dropped +The title of thy father, lest thy duty +Should pay the debt thy love could solve alone. +All this and more, that to thy friends and thee +Pertains, at fitting time thou shalt be told. +But now thy nuptials wait--the happy close +Of thy hard trial--wholesome, though severe! +The world won't cheat thee now--thy heart is proved; - +Thou know'st thy peace by finding out its bane, +And ne'er will act from reckless impulse more! + + + +Footnotes: + + + +{1} The other play, The Love-Chase, is released in a separated +eText with Project Gutenberg and not included here.--DP. + +{2} In representation, the passages following this are curtailed +and the scene runs as follows:- + +Master Walter continues - +The first side shows their passion in the dawn - +In the next side 'tis shining open day - +In the third there's clouding--I but touch on these +To make a long tale brief, and bring thee to +The last side. + +Julia. What shows that? + +Wal. The fate of love +That will not be advised.--The scene's a dungeon, +Its tenant is the page--he lies in fetters. + +Julia. Hard! +Hard as the steel, the hands that put them on! &c. + + + + + +End of The Project Gutenberg Etext of The Hunchback, by J. S. Knowles + |