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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/31340-h.zip b/31340-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..7003859 --- /dev/null +++ b/31340-h.zip diff --git a/31340-h/31340-h.htm b/31340-h/31340-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..1a34ec6 --- /dev/null +++ b/31340-h/31340-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,3228 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> + +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> + <head> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" /> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> + <title> + The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Colored Girl Beautiful, by E. Azalia Hackley. + </title> + <style type="text/css"> + +body { + margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; +} + + h1,h2,h3,h4,h5,h6 { + text-align: center; /* all headings centered */ + clear: both; +} + +p { + margin-top: .75em; + text-align: justify; + margin-bottom: .75em; +} + + +.fm3 {font-size: 100%; + text-align: center; + font-weight: bold; +} + +.fm4 {font-size: 90%; + text-align: center; + font-weight: bold; +} + +hr { + width: 33%; + margin-top: 2em; + margin-bottom: 2em; + margin-left: auto; + margin-right: auto; + clear: both; +} + +table {margin: auto; text-align: center; width: 35em;} +td.tdl {text-align: left; padding-right: .5em;} +td.tdr {text-align: right; padding-left: .5em;} +td.tdc {text-align: center} +td.page {font-size: 90%;} + +.author {text-align: right; margin-right: 20%;} + +.pagenum { /* uncomment the next line for invisible page numbers */ + /* visibility: hidden; */ + position: absolute; + left: 92%; + font-size: smaller; + text-align: right; +} /* page numbers */ + + +.transnote { background-color: #ADD8E6; color: inherit; margin: 2em 10% 1em 10%; font-size: 80%; padding: 0.5em 1em 0.5em 1em;} +.transnote p { text-align: left;} + +ins.correction { + text-decoration:none; /* replace default underline.. */ + border-bottom: thin dotted red; /* ..with thin dotted red */ +} + +/* Poetry */ +.poem { + margin-left:10%; + margin-right:10%; + text-align: left; +} + +.poem br {display: none;} + +.poem .stanza {margin: 1em 0em 1em 0em;} + +.poem span.i0 { + display: block; + margin-left: 0em; + padding-left: 3em; + text-indent: -3em; +} + +/* Footnotes */ +.footnotes {border: dashed 1px;} + +.footnote {margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; font-size: 0.9em;} + +.footnote .label {position: absolute; right: 84%; text-align: right;} + +.fnanchor { + vertical-align: super; + font-size: .8em; + text-decoration: + none; +} + +/* Images */ +.figcenter { + margin: auto; + text-align: center; +} + + </style> + </head> +<body> + + +<pre> + +Project Gutenberg's The Colored Girl Beautiful, by E. Azalia Hackley + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Colored Girl Beautiful + +Author: E. Azalia Hackley + +Release Date: February 21, 2010 [EBook #31340] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE COLORED GIRL BEAUTIFUL *** + + + + +Produced by Suzanne Shell, Carla Foust and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) + + + + + + +</pre> + + +<div class="transnote"> +<h3>Transcriber's note</h3> +<p>Minor punctuation errors have been changed without notice. Printer +errors have been changed, and they are indicated with +a <a class="correction" title="like this" href="#tnotes">mouse-hover</a> +and listed at the +<a href="#tnotes">end of this book</a>. +</p> +</div> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 406px;"> +<img src="images/cover.jpg" width="406" height="600" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + + + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h1>THE<br /> +<br /> +COLORED GIRL<br /> +<br /> +BEAUTIFUL</h1> + + +<p class="fm3">By<br /> +<br /> +E. AZALIA HACKLEY<br /> +<br /> +Author of "A Guide in Voice Culture" and<br /> +"Public School Lessons in Voice Culture."<br /> +<br /> +BURTON PUBLISHING COMPANY<br /> +PUBLISHERS<br /> +KANSAS CITY, MISSOURI<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p class="fm4">Copyrighted 1916<br /> +By E. Azalia Hackley</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Dedication" id="Dedication"></a>Dedication.</h2> + + +<p>To colored women in whom I have faith and to colored children whom I +love, I send this little message.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[9]</a></span></p> +<h2><a name="Foreword" id="Foreword"></a>Foreword.</h2> + + +<p>This volume has been compiled from talks given to girls in colored +boarding schools. The first talk was given at the Tuskegee Institute at +the request of the Dean of the Girls' Department.</p> + +<p>It was an impromptu talk after an hour's notice. Just before the Dean +closed the door to leave me alone with the girls, I repeated my +question, "What shall I talk about?" The reply was, "Tell them anything +you think they should know. They will believe an experienced woman like +you who travels and knows the world and life."</p> + +<p>As I looked at the sea of faces, "wanting to know," and as I thought of +<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[10]</a></span>all they had to learn, the vastness of all of it almost overpowered me. +"May I sit down, girls? Now, what shall we talk about that is +interesting to every one of you?"</p> + +<p>"Would you like to talk about Love—real Love?" "Yes, yes," came the +answer. "Would you like to talk about Beauty—real Beauty?" "Yes! Yes!" +they answered and the chairs were pulled forward. For forty minutes we +had a heart to heart talk. The dean and teachers had perhaps told the +girls the same words, but the message seemed to come more directly to +them from one who had daily contact with the great, busy world.</p> + +<p>The talks were very informal and personal and as the girls asked +questions the thought came to me to jot down the points, that similar +talks might be given to the girls in other schools. Then came the +request, "You come so seldom, can you print the talks?" Much of the +<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[11]</a></span>talks could not be printed because many of the questions and answers +were personal.</p> + +<p>If I had a daughter I would desire that she should know these things and +more, that she might be a beacon light to her home and to the race. As I +have not been blessed with a daughter, I send these thoughts to the +daughters of other colored women, hoping that among them there is some +new thought worthy of a racial "Amen."</p> + +<p class="author">E. AZALIA HACKLEY.</p> + +<p>Chicago, Ill., August, 1916.<br /> +<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</a></span></p> +<h2><a name="CONTENTS" id="CONTENTS"></a>CONTENTS</h2> + +<table summary="CONTENTS"> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Future</td> +<td class="tdr">Page <a href="#Page_17">17</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Colored Child Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_23">23</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Colored Girl Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_41">41</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl"><a name='TC_1'></a><ins title="Was 'Laws'">Law</ins> Of Attraction—Vibrations</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_55">55</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">Love</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_61">61</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">Personal Appearance</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_71">71</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">Deep Breathing</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_79">79</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">Originality</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_85">85</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">Youth And Maturity</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_97">97</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">Self Control</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_101">101</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">Her Relationship With Men</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_109">109</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Religion Of The Colored Girl Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_117">117</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The School Of The Colored Girl Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_133">133</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Home Of The Colored Girl Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_143">143</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Colored Woman Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_161">161</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Colored Wife Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_169">169</a></td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td class="tdl">The Colored Mother Beautiful</td> +<td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_181">181</a></td> +</tr> +</table> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[15]<br />[16]</a></span></p> +<h2><a name="The_Future" id="The_Future"></a>The Future.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[17]</a></span></p> +<p>The beautiful part about the colored race in America, is the future. As +a mixed race we are undeveloped. We may become whatever we WILL to +become.</p> + +<p>This race is a growing people. The future is veiled but it may reveal +some strange things to the world. What opportunities there are for +leadership! If there were only some ways to "squelch" the fakers and +arouse the dreamers!</p> + +<p>If each would only think out a different plan for race advancement, +there would always be followers. Some would be attracted in one way and +others reached in another way, and so carry lines of thought.</p> + +<p>The gardener is aiming towards bet<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[18]</a></span>ter vegetation. Scrubs and dwarfs are +sacrificed totally to produce a more perfect plant.</p> + +<p>The horse breeder, any animal breeder, the bird fancier, all aim to get +a better breed of stock in each generation.</p> + +<p>The cry of the hour is "A better breed of babies." As it takes several +generations to breed a prize winner, it is time for the colored race to +look into these things and prepare for the future colored child, +handicapped as it will be. Nature needs assistance in this.</p> + +<p>Attractiveness in appearance is a strong factor in success. A pleasing, +even, charming personal appearance may be cultivated.</p> + +<p>The mind—the gray matter—either fills the body with life or beauty, or +it destroys life and beauty, according to the concentration of thought, +and resulting habits.</p> + +<p>If one were to ask, "Can a leopard change its spots," the reply must +always<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[19]</a></span> be, "No." But if one were to ask if the Negro could change his +appearance, through himself, his own will power, the answer would be, +"Yes," because the Negro has a thinking brain. He may become as +attractive as he wills to become.</p> + +<p>As his taste and ideas of beauty conform to the accepted, so will he +grow like these ideals and standards.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[20]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[21]<br />[22]</a></span></p> +<h2><a name="The_Colored_Child_Beautiful" id="The_Colored_Child_Beautiful"></a>The Colored Child Beautiful.</h2> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[23]</a></span></p> +<p>Every baby is beautiful to its mother. Every colored baby is generally, +only cunning or cute to many of the white race who have their own ideal +of baby beauty, which depends mainly upon a white skin.</p> + +<p>Beauty is a matter of personal opinion. To a savage African, a baby with +a black skin and flat nose is the ideal.</p> + +<p>To a Chinese, a plump, yellow, slant eyed baby satisfies.</p> + +<p>To the Esquimaux, the round faced, small eyed, black haired little one +is the admired type.</p> + +<p>A child should be taught to love and be proud of its race and to know +the good points of the race.</p> + +<p>Colored babies are born with rare<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[24]</a></span> physical gifts. First: They are born +with the most beautiful eyes in the world. Unlike foreign children who +come to this country, they seldom have sore eyes. I have visited about +six hundred colored schools and have yet to see a sore eyed colored +child.</p> + +<p>The obligation of a gift is the preservation and cultivation of this +gift. Little colored children should be taught to keep their eyes open +and bright with intelligence and clear with good health, because the +eyes are the windows of the soul. Their eyes should look straight into +the eyes of others with their souls shining through. Their eyes must be +kind eyes, listening eyes, observant eyes, thoughtful eyes, and +remembering eyes.</p> + +<p>Second: Colored people are credited with having the finest teeth in the +world. The obligation of this gift is cleanliness and preservation of +this attractive gift. A colored child should be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[25]</a></span> taught to deny herself +to pay a dentist's bill.</p> + +<p>Third: Colored people have the finest voices in the world. The +obligation of this gift is its cultivation, proper care and control of +the voice, and to speak in good English.</p> + +<p>There are other natural gifts but of them—later on. The greatest gift +to the Negro is himself. So much in him is hidden, spiritually, +intellectually, <a name='TC_2'></a><ins title="Was 'pyschically'">psychically</ins> and physically, that he is a vast unexplored +mine.</p> + +<p>All colored babies like all little white babies, excepting in the shades +of color, are born about alike, with round or long heads, all with the +same soft spot on the crown, and like white babies, are mostly all mouth +because they are hungry little animals and use their mouths often.</p> + +<p>As the child observes, thinks, and "wills," the bumps and hollows +appear, the features develop and lines grow. Any ugly little baby may +develop into<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[26]</a></span> a beautiful child. Any beautiful child may grow ugly and +coarse.</p> + +<p>If babies were born with developed features they would be monstrosities.</p> + +<p>"Within each of them is an inward sculptor, Thought, who is a rapid, +true workman."</p> + +<p>Colored children should be taught that Thought will improve their good +points and will eradicate any objectionable points. They should be +taught their good points and their bad points, and should be encouraged +to improve their personal appearance, as far as objectionable racial +characteristics are concerned.</p> + +<p>As the girl grows she should be taught the value of personal appearance +as a factor in her life problem and ultimate success.</p> + +<p>A little colored girl who wants to be pretty should be taught what +"pretty" really is. The old proverb says, "Pretty is as pretty does," +thus recognizing the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[27]</a></span> power of the inward Sculptor Thought, and its +controlling and cultivating forces.</p> + +<p>At an early age the child should be given subjects to think about. She +should be taught to see the beautiful in Nature and Art that the +reflection may be seen in her face and in her actions. Ask her if she +saw the sun rise this morning or the sun set last night, or if she +noticed the moon light, or the grandeur of the low black clouds, or the +fleeciness of the soft white clouds; tell her to listen to the language +of the birds and insects, and the sighing of the winds through the +trees. Tell her to listen to the teeming of the earth and ask where and +when the earth smells the sweetest. Teach her to walk and talk with +Mother Nature and to recognize her voice in everything, until Nature +will appear more, mean more, and teach more. Companionship with flowers +and the cultivation of plants is to be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[28]</a></span> recommended, even in the most +congested flat life.</p> + +<p>The colored child should be taught Negro History that she may be proud +of her dark skin. It is a long interesting story way back to the days of +Ethiopian glory, for the Negro is the sub-strata of that race. Tell the +child how fair races from the North invaded Africa, and until today the +present colored race can trace its black blood back to African kings and +queens, and its white blood to the kings and queens of the Old World.<a name="FNanchor_A_1" id="FNanchor_A_1"></a><a href="#Footnote_A_1" class="fnanchor">[A]</a></p> + +<p>Let her know that the black man was the author of much of the world's +history, and that Moro, the capital of Ethiopia, was at one time the +great seat of learning. She should be taught early in life to read +Ancient History, that she <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[29]</a></span>may see what the black man has done for the +world, that she may have pride in her black blood as well as in her +white blood. Tell her the record of the Negro as a soldier, statesman, +and explorer. Read to her about the brave part that he played in the war +of 1812 and subsequent wars, even in the recent terrible war, he was +among the bravest. Help her to make a scrap book that she may pass her +knowledge on to others. While authorities in history say that a race +once great, can never attain greatness again, as truly as the pendulum +swings this mixed race will surely come into its own. The colored race +comes from several lines of white ancestry, and as fruit is grafted to a +finer degree of species, so the colored race will some day show its +latent powers. The child of today is to be the mother of the great child +that is to be, and each one must do her part to help prepare for the +future great colored child.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[30]</a></span></p> + +<p>Teach the colored girl about prejudice. Parents should read up the +World's history of persecution and note the accounts of race and +religious persecution in England, France, Germany, Russia, Turkey and +Spain. Even today there is English hatred of the East Indian, Russian +persecution of the Jew, and Turkish persecution of the Armenians. Then, +too, Europeans are only just beginning to regard the Oriental nations as +human beings. Prejudice is hard to explain and hard to conquer. It has +taken generations in other instances and the world has always kicked the +under dog. Tell the colored child how these other persecuted nations are +conquering prejudice; tell her that each colored child must be a race +missionary and prove her worth and powers, thus winning friends for the +race.</p> + +<p>She must be taught the application of the story of Esther to her race. +Tell her that each colored girl may be an Esther,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[31]</a></span> especially in all +matters of cleanliness, manners, and self sacrifice, to advance and +change the prevalent opinion of the Negro. Each colored woman, not only +bears her own burden, but she bears the burden of posterity and the +burden of the race. Each one must fit herself for the triple burden. Not +even a talent should be used wholly for personal gain nor solely for +present uses. Her education must be a process of development of powers +not only to fit her for citizenship and life, but it must fit her for +her race's burdens.</p> + +<p>Some one has said:</p> + +<p>"To educate a boy is but the education of an individual—but when one +educates a girl, the education of a family results."</p> + +<p>Every little colored girl, like every little white girl, wants to be +beautiful. What is beauty? Beauty is a combination of personal +appearance and charm, and it can not be purchased.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[32]</a></span></p> + +<p>Each year the merchant takes stock and separates all the best articles, +the medium articles, and the poor articles.</p> + +<p>And so when one determines upon self improvement, she should take stock. +She sums up her good points and her bad points. The good points she will +accentuate and the bad points she will eradicate, unless Thought, the +inward Sculptor has been at work too long. It is for this reason that +little colored children should be taught early in life to think rightly.</p> + +<p>"As the sprig is bent, so will the tree be."</p> + +<p>Every thought, every emotion has an outward manifestation. Because +people think, feel, and act, they leave marks of these in bodily lines +and habits. Not only is the face a bulletin board, but as Schopenhauer +says, "One's life may be his autobiography." One's life may even be read +from his skeleton.</p> + +<p>Sometimes certain thoughts and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[33]</a></span> habits repeated and repeated leave +spots. Spots always depreciate whether on wool, meat, wood, animals or +people. Has the Negro any "Spots"? Other people think so. If these +so-called "spots" will interfere with his future success in life then +let him eradicate them with the inward Sculptor—Thought.</p> + +<p>Is the dark skin a spot? Oh no, it is his history, his strength, as was +Samson's hair. Because of his color he has powers and forces which could +get him anything he desires in life if he would only begin while a +child, to learn restraint, how to govern and control himself until he +could accumulate sufficient will power to direct these forces for his +own advancement.</p> + +<p>Because of his color he has rare psychic powers which are not yet +understood by himself or by the world.</p> + +<p>What is the largest Spot? If one wishes to get a true estimate of +him<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[34]</a></span>self he finds out what others ridicule concerning him.</p> + +<p>What feature about the Negro is ridiculed the most? Why, the mouth. What +is the matter with it? A large mouth is supposed to be the sign of +generosity. No, but if it has thick lips and is a leaking mouth? If it +hangs open too much? Only two classes of persons are excused from having +open mouths, and these are children with adenoids and imbeciles. Every +one else is supposed to keep his mouth shut most of the time.</p> + +<p>The leaking mouth with the hanging under jaw causes a tendency to "leak" +along other lines. One's business and personal affairs "leak" in street +cars, public places, and on the streets to the detriment of the race.</p> + +<p>Permitting the lips to hang, thickens them. They grow too heavy to hold +up. Too much grinning and loud laughter will widen the mouth and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[35]</a></span> loosen +it. We do not desire small mouths, but we do not look attractive with +"leaking mouths." Our mouths are improving. In the schools and college +pictures we find unmistakable evidence that Thought is working wonders +with the Negro mouth.</p> + +<p>What is the next most ridiculed "Spot"? The nose. What is the matter +with the noses? Large noses are said to be an indication of character +and ability. Napoleon always selected the generals with large noses +because he believed them to be more efficient. Oh, but the noses are +often flat and have no hump.</p> + +<p>Look at the hump of the Roman nose which indicates "fight." Look at the +hump of the Indian nose which also indicates warlike tendencies. Take +the Jewish nose. The hump means fight—a continual warfare for gold.</p> + +<p>But the Negro has been a peaceful person, consequently he developed no<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[36]</a></span> +nose hump. It is time that he developed a hump—a Negroid hump. He must +pinch up, think up, will up, a hump. The time has come to fight, not +only for rights, but for looks as well. He must build up a nose with +more character, which can not be ridiculed. Grinning widens the nose and +prevents its upward building, so grinning must cease.</p> + +<p>In examining the pictures of graduates from the different schools, we +find that Thought is changing the noses as well as the mouths. As the +mouth and nose are changed, so will the whole expression of the face be +changed.</p> + +<p>The Negro's hair may be considered a "Spot" by some, but care and +cultivation are changing this so-called "Spot" and more care and +attention will work more wonderful results.<a name="FNanchor_B_2" id="FNanchor_B_2"></a><a href="#Footnote_B_2" class="fnanchor">[B]</a></p> + +<p>His eyes and his teeth are good points and he has been given a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[37]</a></span> +magnificent backbone as well as a beautiful voice, although he often +permits these gifts to degenerate.</p> + +<p>Because God has given each colored girl a beautiful voice, she should be +taught to speak in a soft mellow tone. She should speak eloquently and +elegantly. If she screeches or yells and abuses her vocal cords, she +will not only disgust people but she will lose her voice and have no +beauty of tone to bequeath.</p> + +<p>As the colored child has been made in the image of God, her poise should +be erect and fearless. Nature bestowed the gift of a straight backbone.</p> + +<p>The native African has always been straight like the pine sapling. In +civ<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[38]</a></span>ilization his descendant permits his back to bend. The chest caves +in, squeezing the heart, lungs and liver. One is more liable to +pneumonia and tuberculosis, and can not fight them successfully as these +organs have lost much of their vital force because of their cramped +conditions.</p> + +<p>Power is expressed in the way one carries her shoulders, and vitality is +measured by breathing capacity.</p> + +<p>One may sin against God and be forgiven, but Mother Nature never +forgives the sin against her. Unto the third and fourth generation the +punishment goes on for the abuse of the temple of the Soul.</p> + +<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3> + +<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_A_1" id="Footnote_A_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor_A_1"><span class="label">[A]</span></a> NOTE. The Bible and other books tell us that the Ethiopians +were a prominent people before the time of Christ. +</p><p> +Recently in excavations pictures of Egyptian princes reigning 2900-2750 +B. C. prove from their hair that they had Negro blood. America will have +these proofs in the Boston Museum of Fine Arts.</p></div> + +<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_B_2" id="Footnote_B_2"></a><a href="#FNanchor_B_2"><span class="label">[B]</span></a> NOTE. "Kinky hair is neither a disgraceful nor a shameful +heredity. It is an honorable legacy from Africa. A kind Mother Nature +protected her children from the torrid sun which kept the oils and waxes +in a fluid state or else the hair would have dried up. The chemical +action of the atmosphere caused a shrinking into spirals which further +protected the uncovered heads from scorching." +</p><p> +Constant care of the hair will cause an improved condition of the +texture which will in time be inherited.</p></div> +</div> + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[39]<br />[40]</a></span></p> +<h2><a name="The_Colored_Girl_Beautiful" id="The_Colored_Girl_Beautiful"></a>The Colored Girl Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[41]</a></span></p> +<p>Every colored girl would like to be beautiful. The so-called beauty is +but skin deep. A burn, a scar, a disease, and beauty is fled, although +contour and other evidences might remain.</p> + +<p>One can not remove bad looks with soap and water. Youth should be and is +always attractive. It is after twenty-five that one begins to wish that +she had been more careful in her youth, that she had controlled her +powers, and that she had cultivated her good points and removed her +"Spots."</p> + +<p>A girl should study herself, learn her powers, and she will get the real +beauty if she will deliberately and persistently train for it.</p> + +<p>We look at the photos of beautiful,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[42]</a></span> smiling, round-faced children and +then at the tired, many-lined unhappy faces into which they have +changed. Women delight in showing us photos to prove how beautiful they +were when they were sweet sixteen. As we look, it is hard to believe. +However, the camera, they say, always tells the truth, and we have later +evidence before us.</p> + +<p>The inward tools, Thoughts, have carved the ugly pictures on faces. +Ignorance is a terrible curse along all lines. Many have not learned the +secret of preserving their bodies, along with other studies, yet the +savage nations care for their bodies.</p> + +<p>Girls abuse their bodies; they eat too much or else the wrong kind of +food, causing indigestion or other stomach and liver troubles. There is +no room for the distended digestive organs and gorged stomachs and if +these walls are stretched too often they lose their elasticity and the +digestive<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[43]</a></span> juices go on a strike, causing eruptions on the face and a +bad complexion, besides other complications which destroy beauty. Then, +too, coarse or highly seasoned foods arouse other appetites through the +law of sympathy.</p> + +<p>Girls do not heed the signs of colds and complications peculiar to +women. Operations are often necessary because of exposure and neglect of +colds. The clothing is often too tight and pressure causes malignant +growth and great suffering in after years.</p> + +<p>A girl should keep her face as clean as a man's face after shaving, and +her body should be correspondingly clean, that the gases and odors may +escape, lest they take revenge upon her face. A girl should no more +offer a foul odor of body or mouth or nose, than she would offer poison.</p> + +<p>A girl must study her body and preserve it by attending to colds and +diseases in time.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[44]</a></span></p> + +<p>One who desires beauty should fight against a desire for intoxicants. +There is nothing that coarsens the skin of some women so quickly as the +habit of drinking beer. Chewing gum coarsens the muscles of the jaw and +gives a downward trend that few faces can afford to wear.</p> + +<p>The real beauty is carved from within and the inward Sculptor is always +at work. One may buy artificial teeth, hair and limbs, but no cosmetics +or massage will cover up the ravages of Thought. Every thought leaves +its imprint and every emotion leaves its manifestation.</p> + +<p>Beauty is not always a tangible something. Many people are called +beautiful when they do not even own attractive features. Charm and +personality throw a special light over the features, thus transforming +them. Any one may cultivate charm and person<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[45]</a></span>ality if she has not been +born with them.</p> + +<p>To be beautiful, one must fill her mind with beautiful thoughts. Impure +thoughts, angry thoughts, unhappy thoughts, jealous thoughts, and +cowardly thoughts will arise, but they must be driven away. Health +suffers from these thoughts because they affect sleep and appetite. +Lines appear upon the face as an index of interior troubles.</p> + +<p>One must not only be careful of thinking detrimental things, but she +must be careful of what she says to others, and of what she writes in +letters, for writing a thought intensifies its influence.</p> + +<p>Impure novels often lead girls astray or give them impure thoughts which +are printed or published in their faces.</p> + +<p>A girl should not affect boldness. It "sets" the muscles in the face and +neck. One should affect modesty and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[46]</a></span> purity even if one does not feel +them, that they may enhance her looks.</p> + +<p>Rough uncouth actions and gestures cause ugly lines in the face.</p> + +<p>Not only is the face the bulletin board of habitual thought, but the +body reflects thought through gestures and other movements.</p> + +<p>Repose of manner and a soft voice are two of the greatest charms that a +woman may possess. Restlessness is not only a sign of lost control, it +gives a false idea to passers-by. Quietude gives a sense of power. +Control is culture, and culture is a beauty point.</p> + +<p>Some one has said that in the matter of first impression, "appearance is +half and the voice is the other half." "Later you will be able to make +one forget an unattractive appearance, but we never grow accustomed to a +rasping voice." "Nothing in the world is so humiliating as to be a +graceful and beautiful woman with a bad voice."<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[47]</a></span></p> + +<p>Talkativeness is another "Spot," and a sign of lost control. In public +places, especially, it is a sign of ill breeding and bad taste. Good +breeding should always keep a woman from loud talk. We must remove the +stigma of loudness and coarseness that now rests upon the race. The less +a person knows, the bigger noise she generally makes. The big touring +car never makes the noise that a motor cycle does, nor does a great +steamer make the fuss that a tug boat does. The deep stream is silent +while the little brook babbles.</p> + +<p>It is exceedingly vulgar to air one's opinions in street cars, railroad +cars, or in any public place. A person who really knows anything does +not parade his knowledge or his opinions.</p> + +<p>While emotional people are generally attractive, yet the habit of the +expression of the emotions could be turned to better account.</p> + +<p>Lost Motion and Lost Emotion are<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[48]</a></span> the two great "wastes" of the race.</p> + +<p>One not only enhances her beauty but one is really a Somebody or a +Nobody according to the control she has over her mind and body. She must +control her emotions as she does her appetite. Excessive emotion +debilitates the system. Anger is poison to a woman's system. It causes a +chemical action which upsets the stomach. The bite of an angry person is +sometimes poisonous, because of this chemical change. A fit of anger may +upset the whole digestive system, and may even cause death because blood +is taken from the digestive system and many bodily functions cease. Any +emotion causes the heart to beat faster.</p> + +<p>There is health as well as beauty in self control. Culture is self +control. The Colored Girl Beautiful should cultivate reposefulness. A +display of emotion or restlessness indicates lost control.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[49]</a></span></p> + +<p>There are only two classes of people who are excusable for disturbing +large quantities of air in their movements. These are babies and +lunatics, because neither have brain development nor mental control.</p> + +<p>The colored girl beautiful must learn to sit still. She must learn to be +methodical in order to have resting periods. She needs a few minutes +each day for relaxation and repose. If she has not learned to relax, she +should change her occupation at different periods of the day. She must +train herself not to get excited. She must not quarrel or argue. She +must train herself to be temper-immune, and not to permit others to +upset her equilibrium.</p> + +<p>A real lady never gets visibly angry. Anger drives away friends who +really help to make us beautiful by giving us pleasant sensations.</p> + +<p>One should be eternally feminine.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[50]</a></span> One should not attempt athletics +unless she is sure that her physique will endure this. A strain may +wreck one's health and looks. Most women are built like watches—one +thing wrong upsets the whole mechanism.</p> + +<p>Observing the small courtesies in life makes one charming. Knowledge of +the various forms of society etiquette has made many women popular and +has placed them in an enviable social position. Real politeness comes +from a kind heart, from good impulses and it ranks as a strong beauty +point because it illumines the face.</p> + +<p>If one is obliged to work out for a living she must remember that habit +affects looks. If one is energetic and happy the face will reflect the +content. If one shirks her duty and hates her work, her face will +reflect discontent; her vital organs will weigh downward and affect her +health, and her looks will suffer. One must affect enthusiasm in<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[51]</a></span> her +work to stimulate the vital organs.</p> + +<p>So the real beauty is carved from within and the inward Sculptor is +always at work. A girl is her own beauty doctor and can work out her own +beauty destiny. She may have everything in life that she wills, if she +will only guide this inner workman.</p> + +<p>A girl who lives in the back woods may make herself so choice and +beautiful in the indescribable way, that her fame will spread miles +away. She should bide her time, stay to herself until she has fully +improved herself, mind and body, and she will reap her full reward.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[52]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[53]<br />[54]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="Law_of_Attraction_Vibrations" id="Law_of_Attraction_Vibrations"></a>Law of Attraction—Vibrations.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[55]</a></span></p> +<p>Every one of us has a magnet within which attracts others for good or +evil, and which is attracted by good or evil. The old philosophers have +given us many proverbs to bear out this truth. We have the saying, +"Birds of a feather flock together."</p> + +<p>The law of vibrations was studied centuries ago by the old wise men.</p> + +<p>One attracts the kind of vibrations that one sends out. The Bible also +has given us many commandments and injunctions to protect us from +ourselves. We are told that one must love if one would be loved; "to +cast thy bread upon the waters and it shall return to you," "as ye sow, +so shall ye reap."<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[56]</a></span></p> + +<p>Whatever is projected returns sooner or later. One may not even send an +evil thought as in an anonymous letter, valentine, or register an +unexpressed wish without making herself liable to self punishment.</p> + +<p>One's personality and thoughts, either good or evil, always surround +her, "like a contagious cloud." A strong personality will influence a +weaker personality just as a magnet attracts. Many are influenced +because they vibrate similarly and many are influenced because they are +attractable or weak.</p> + +<p>Revivals, riots, political agitations and race prejudices are all +evidences of the power of strong projections of thought. Race prejudice +is the result of the vibrations of hate and anger sent out by strong +minds. The world is what one makes it by the projection of one's +thought. The magnetic, energetic, hearty person brings things<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[57]</a></span> about +because he projects a stronger vibration of thought, will power and +personality, whether in a hearty hand shake, sunny smile or display of +interest.</p> + +<p>By helping others we help ourselves. We must learn to give, give, give, +in order to receive.</p> + +<p>The sporting element and the under world recognize and fear the laws of +vibrations. They know nothing of the laws but they have instinctive +recognition of some force, which returns the act. They give because they +desire luck. One may always receive help from them because they are +afraid to refuse aid.</p> + +<p>Washington Irving has said, "Happiness is a reflection." "Everybody's +countenance is a mirror transmitting to others, its rays." If one makes +a habit of sending out happy, loving thoughts, the face reflects the +thought and gains in charm and beauty.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[58]</a></span></p> + +<p>We must teach our minds to act upon the minds of others. We must learn +the laws and obey them, that we may send out strong thoughts of peace +and love to counteract the overwhelming tide of thought against us.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[59]<br />[60]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="Love" id="Love"></a>Love.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[61]</a></span></p> +<p>There are many kinds of love. There is filial love, platonic love, the +love leading to marriage, and the greatest love of all, mother love. Too +many desecrate love by regarding it as a pastime, or selling all that +passes for it, for favors, attentions and support.</p> + +<p>What is love? Many definitions could be given but the best answer is, +"Love is the habit of giving the best in us." Some one has said that +"Love is the easiest thing to make and the hardest to keep."</p> + +<p>So much of the life force is wasted because people imagine they are in +love.</p> + +<p>Somehow, girls are given to "falling in love," first with one man, then<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[62]</a></span> +with another. With each man there is the feminine desire to reciprocate +in full measure for various courtesies.</p> + +<p>What is the result?</p> + +<p>The vital forces are willfully wasted.</p> + +<p>Beauty needs powerful stimulants. No one could expect a tree to blossom +into a beautiful mature form if the sap were withdrawn. Youth is the +green apple period. One can never tell how a little green apple may +develop. It may become full blown and rosy cheeked, or it may become +worm eaten and cankered.</p> + +<p>Girls permit boys and men to kiss and fondle them (as one woman has +said, "to paw and claw them") and in turn they exert themselves to live +up to what they imagine is expected of them, believing it to be a fair +exchange for gifts and attention.</p> + +<p>When hypnotists desire to take the will power from their subjects they +use their hands in strokings.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[63]</a></span></p> + +<p>Girls should not permit young men to caress them, to hold their hands, +or to stroke their bodies. It is very weakening. It causes a girl to +yield to temptation because it induces passiveness to the will of the +projector.</p> + +<p>There is no present which a boy or man could give to a girl which is +worth the tiniest atom of this precious invisible life current. In after +life she realizes her folly, but it is then too late to remedy it.</p> + +<p>Often a perfectly pure minded girl in her youth wastes her life forces +with one beau after another, innocently imagining it to be her duty +because of the attentions that she receives. When she marries the "man +among men to her," she finds that she can not hold his affections +because of this waste, and often she sees another woman get the love +that is her due, as a wife. At the time of life when maturity should +give a full blown rose of a woman, she<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[64]</a></span> has dribbled out because she has +been too ardent. She is worm eaten and cankered because she has +devastated nature, and it is all her own fault.</p> + +<p>It is a debatable question whether a girl who has kissed many men, and +has thus wasted her vital forces would be a fit candidate for +Motherhood, and, on the other hand whether a boy or man who steals the +life forces from our girls is fit to be a father. A man has no more +right to steal this precious beauty stimulant from a girl than he has to +steal her clothes.</p> + +<p>Every man knows that if the girl he escorts around will kiss him, that +she has kissed the one who preceded him and will kiss the one who +follows him. It is no wonder that many men marry girls who have not +seemed so promiscuous. Many a good girl has been passed or +misunderstood.</p> + +<p>Colored girls should never sell their bodies and they should set a +higher<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[65]</a></span> value upon their bodies in every way. Especially should they be +known as "Hands off" girls.</p> + +<p>No one would think of handling a rare flower and expect it to endure. +The virgin soul is always likened to a flower.</p> + +<p>If a young man after a few calls thinks that he is entitled to a +goodnight kiss he should be speedily set right.</p> + +<p>Any emotion or feeling diffusing the body has an effect upon health and +upon beauty. An organ may become exhausted from the rush of blood caused +by an impure thought.</p> + +<p>Kissing excites passions until they become uncontrollable.</p> + +<p>A girl must cultivate her will power along with charm and personal +magnetism in order to become a beautiful woman. She must resist the +temptation to scatter her vital forces, so that when she marries she may +hold all of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[66]</a></span> her powers for the man she desires to hold. She should +patiently wait for her "prince" and aim to give him unkissed lips, and +virginity of mind as well as of body. It will be a tremendous +satisfaction in fulfilling the definition of Love and Motherhood, +besides giving the real beauty.</p> + +<p>When boys and men desire caresses and kisses, a girl should send a +message to her Solar Plexus—her reflex nerve—to help her to say, "No." +She should let no present tempt her to be fleeced of her beauty food.</p> + +<p>In order to resist temptation, girls should be taught deep breathing, +that the diaphragm and educated nerves may obey emergency orders. The +practice of deep breathing is invaluable in the matter of resistance, +and will back up the "I <a name='TC_3'></a><ins title="Was 'wont'">won't</ins>", "I won't", "I won't", "Hands off", +"Hands off". A girl must hold her fists tightly and resist.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[67]</a></span></p> + +<p>She must psychologize the mind with thoughts of resistance by practicing +simple breathing movements, so that when temptation is imminent the +holding of a deep breath will be her salvation. The action of her +diaphragm and Solar Plexus will prevent any wavering.</p> + +<p>To cultivate and hold vital strength, one must hoard every atom of vital +strength. One may not even afford to write love letters in too warm a +strain. One will not only be ashamed in after years when this particular +fever has worn itself out, but one will then be conscious of wasted +vital strength.</p> + +<p>Beauty is so dependent upon vital strength that every atom of vital +force is needed and none must be wasted.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[68]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[69]<br />[70]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="Personal_Appearance" id="Personal_Appearance"></a>Personal Appearance.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[71]</a></span></p> +<p>Trifles show up the real character more than anything else, in clothes, +or the care of the hair, teeth or finger nails. Personal appearance is +one of the strongest factors in the beauty combination. After health, +voice, and poise comes the value of dress as a beauty accessory. Dress +has much to do with a man's classification of feminine beauty although +he may not be dress informed. Many French women are considered beautiful +because of charming dress accessories, which are generally immaculate +and in harmony. A modest girl dresses modestly; a sensible person makes +her clothes fit her person, her height, head, back view, side view, +ankles and heels. A woman's dress soon tells the character of the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[72]</a></span> +wearer and betrays immorality. Even colors talk.</p> + +<p>With many people, finery seems to mean good dressing, yet their clothes +jar, cry out, even "scream out their unfitness and unwholesomeness, and +betray their dishonesty, shame and sacrifice." Clothes show silliness, +conceit, and selfishness more than any other thing, and often they shame +a home, so a colored girl should study her individuality and her life +position and dress accordingly. She should wear only becoming colors, +and she might affect a certain color to her advantage. She should +"cling" to what is becoming rather than follow exaggerated fashions. The +exclusive dressers in high society study to get simple lines; with them +severity in line is elegance. Such clothes wear several seasons. No one +minds wearing a becoming style a long time. Few colored women can afford +to keep up the pace of styles.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[73]</a></span> There are women who live to dress no +matter what the cost may be but they are not to be envied for this +slavish passion.</p> + +<p>A man wears a good suit several years and looks well. Colored women +could plan their costumes that they might at least last two seasons. +They should study to make the most of what they have on hand.</p> + +<p>One good black dress still remains an asset to a wardrobe and most +colored women look well in black especially if it is relieved by a +becoming color.</p> + +<p>In France only the "Boulevard" women and actresses wear the exaggerated +styles that we see in the French fashion journals.</p> + +<p>The Colored Girl Beautiful will take care of her clothes. She will learn +to press and sponge, also the use of cleaning fluids, and to forbear +from sitting carelessly on coats and other apparel.</p> + +<p>Work clothes should be becoming in<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[74]</a></span> color and style. While one is buying +or making she may as well select attractive models. When one is attired +in unbecoming clothes, unconsciously the face reflects the thought in +unbecoming lines. One's voice takes on a coarser, unbecoming tone, and +the poise takes on an unbecoming attitude. For the same reason our girls +should not wear men's old hats or paper bags on their heads.</p> + +<p>One should aim to select something becoming that the face and body may +always appear at their best. One must be on beauty parade ALL the time +to get beauty lines.</p> + +<p>Appropriate clothes should be worn at all times. Pink or blue satin or +silk dresses should not be worn on Sunday or at church, even if one can +afford them. It is bad taste and sets a bad example to poorer girls who +sometimes sell their honor, even their lives for these perishable, +inappropriate costumes.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[75]</a></span></p> + +<p>In every mind there is a picture gallery of our friends and the people +we meet. Sometimes the pictures that we carry are not the best ones. One +is often caught unawares in soiled, unbecoming garments. It is not +necessary in this day and time to give an ugly picture of ourselves.</p> + +<p>We should be particular to give the best possible, most pleasing picture +to others at all times. There should be no "being caught." One should be +prepared early in the morning, any time of day, and all through the +night.</p> + +<p>On the streets and as the street cars pass our homes, colored people +should give the best pictures possible of themselves, if they can not of +the houses in which they live. We are a poor people but we can be quiet, +clean, becomingly and fittingly dressed. We must stifle the desire to be +conspicuous unless it is to be conspicuous by quietness.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[76]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[77]<br />[78]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="Deep_Breathing" id="Deep_Breathing"></a>Deep Breathing.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[79]</a></span></p> +<p>The Greeks are quoted as saying, "A healthy soul can only live in a +healthy body." People are beginning to see that to a great extent, +intellectual vigor depends upon physical vigor.</p> + +<p>Man is an air breathing animal.</p> + +<p>Air is life. One may go without food and water for days but not many +minutes without air.</p> + +<p>Air is the most important factor in generating vital force and it is the +best tonic in the world.</p> + +<p>A large, deep, chest indicates Health, Strength and Vitality. The size +of the chest indicates the size of the lungs. A narrow chest indicates +cramped lungs, heart, digestive organs and a small diaphragm.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[80]</a></span></p> + +<p>The diaphragm is the dome shaped breathing muscle which serves as a +partition between the chest and abdominal organs. Its contraction causes +development of the lungs and heart and at the same time the internal +massage of the abdominal organs.</p> + +<p>The lungs have been called the scavengers of the body for they take off +poison which would kill us.</p> + +<p>As the blood stores oxygen especially at night, windows should be kept +open to prepare the body for the next day's duties.</p> + +<p>"Exercise is the elixir of youth."</p> + +<p>Many people do not exert themselves enough to open the millions of +little lung cells. Mother Nature demands a heavy price for this neglect +of her laws.</p> + +<p>The heart is now recognized as a muscle which needs muscular exercise as +other muscles need exercise.</p> + +<p>The heart is very wonderful. Although it weighs only about eleven<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[81]</a></span> +ounces it has each day a lifting strength of 120 tons to the height of a +foot. With seventy beats of a pulse a minute, six ounces of blood are +forced into arteries seventy times a minute or 187½ gallons every +hour. This could fill a lake or pond in a life time.</p> + +<p>Deep breathing is the fundamental foundation of Physical Culture, of +Singing and of Oratory. This is why these studies are recommended to +lessen the susceptibility to disease especially tuberculosis and other +lung diseases.</p> + +<p>Deep breathing cures nervousness and many chronic complaints because it +improves the circulation of the blood and causes internal massage +especially of the abdominal organs.</p> + +<p>Deep breathers are seldom mentally weak because deep breathing develops +Will power. Its study causes pride in one's body and its physical gifts +be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[82]</a></span>cause it teaches the values and beauties of different parts of the +body.</p> + +<p>The habit of deep breathing cultivates Personality and Personal +Magnetism and thus makes one attractive. A great deal of the success in +life comes from winning people through Personal Magnetism.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[83]<br />[84]</a></span></p> +<h2><a name="Originality" id="Originality"></a>Originality.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[85]</a></span></p> +<p>A woman's mind should always be filled with a life plan, else she is in +danger. A busy woman is generally a safe woman. She must find her life +work and keep busy. Even a hobby is better than nothing if time hangs on +her hands. She should do something with all her might and not delay, for +Time is flying.</p> + +<p>A colored woman especially should have some purpose in life to further +race advancement. It should not only be a high purpose but it should be +something real.</p> + +<p>To be enthusiastic about something is beautifying because it stimulates +the circulation of the blood. Any kind of success comes from enthusiasm.</p> + +<p>No matter how poor a woman may<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[86]</a></span> be she may be original in her ideas. At +first, of course, she must use the ideas of others, until she can show +her cleverness through her adaptations, and employing her powers and +gifts will add until larger powers and gifts result.</p> + +<p>She must try to get a new line of work for race advancement and dedicate +herself to it. If she eliminates the Ego (Self) and will aim to work for +the good of others, she will succeed.</p> + +<p>Each one should find a realm, something in which she shall be supreme, +and be first. "It is better to be first in an Iberian village than +second in Rome." The race needs daring original people, to think and +speak.</p> + +<p>Emerson says, "Every man has a call to do something unique."</p> + +<p>The person who thinks up new lines of study, thought and ideas for the +race, enlarging its vision and enrich<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[87]</a></span>ing its mind is a race benefactor. +Ruskin's creed of work should be the universal creed. "The man or woman +who does work worth doing is the man or woman who lives and breathes his +work; with whom it is ever present in his or her soul; whose ambition is +to do it well and feel rewarded by the thought of having done it well. +That man, that woman, puts the whole country under an obligation."</p> + +<p>Colored women have a genius for leadership. There is great executive +force in them. Many a colored woman is an undeveloped genius waiting for +opportunity. One should try avenue after avenue until the right one +opens, for her life work.</p> + +<p>In spite of criticism she must fight on, alone if necessary, "With God, +one is a majority," said Frederick Douglass.</p> + +<p>If one can not be a genius or be original, she may do anything near at +hand.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[88]</a></span> She should find something to do so that she will have something +to talk about besides herself and her friends.</p> + +<p>One might take up the study of music, voice culture, elocution, art, +embroidery or housekeeping (domestic science) and pass it along to +others.</p> + +<p>The surest way to make people "take notice of one" is to work for +others. One may also live in peoples' hearts as well as their minds, if +she will ally herself with a good humanitarian cause.</p> + +<p>If one is not what is termed religious, or is lacking in religious +feeling, she should at least conceal this serious void by showing +respect for religion in no unmistakable terms for the sake of example. +One should always hold up Christian ideals even though she may not be a +spiritual woman or be called an earthly saint. She can hold up for a +more rigid moral code and the highest thought in ethics.</p> + +<p>It pays to be respected, but after one<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[89]</a></span> has trusted and has been +disappointed, deceived, and betrayed, she will find that it pays best to +keep close to the "Cross" where that "One always listens and +understands." One should not get too far away from "It" because one is +certain to return sooner or later.</p> + +<p>The best representative people go to church if only for example's sake. +Even if one were not extremely religious she could be an authority on +religions, reading up the history of other churches as well as one's own +church discipline. One might originate prayers or "graces" for the table +and sell printed copies for a local charity.</p> + +<p>Any woman should be proud to espouse the cause of children and their +broader education, as well as their health and happiness. One might try +to bring a musical artist or lecturer to them every two or three years.</p> + +<p>Every day of one's life there is an opportunity to make some one happy.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[90]</a></span> +One might amuse herself by keeping a diary of her efforts along this +line.</p> + +<p>Speech is a cultivated talent. One might study to be good company, not +to be funny or witty, but she might study the art of expressing herself; +not to air her knowledge, that would be vulgar, but to store her memory +with a fund of information concerning the great paintings and works of +art, and lives of great composers.</p> + +<p>One might even be an authority on economy and demonstrate how to make +over dresses, hats, etc.</p> + +<p>One could economize on her wardrobe and travel on the savings giving +little "Travelogues" to those less fortunate. There is an indescribable +joy and satisfaction in serving others, even though the recipients are +not grateful. It gives one a sense of power and wealth.</p> + +<p>One might even cultivate her sensibilities and increase her knowledge +of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[91]</a></span> the beautiful in Nature and Art, to carry young folks upon little +Nature and Art expeditions to the country or to museums. Permission +might be granted to enter many closed doors. The word children is often +an open sesame.</p> + +<p>If one is tied down to life work inside her home, she may manufacture +smiles and cultivate a beautiful speaking voice. It is a pleasant +occupation to bring smiles to the faces of others. It is rather +fascinating to try to change the expression of other people's faces by +exaggerating the happy timbre in one's voice. Even if one may not do big +things she may charge the atmosphere with smiles.</p> + +<p>When I was a girl, an old friend used to say to me, "Never let people +down you, always come up smiling." One may come up from troubles and +bitterness with a forced smile until the smiling muscles act for +themselves, automatically.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[92]</a></span></p> + +<p>One may also cultivate good manners until she wins a wide reputation for +real ladyship, and thus be an example. Only the uncertain are impolite; +fear is their ruler. Those who own strength and power are always those +who are gentle because they are sure of their life position. Real +politeness is only an outward expression of the generous impulses of the +heart; it is inborn. Politeness may be cultivated until it passes for +the real thing.</p> + +<p>Originality does not include exclusiveness. Exclusiveness is deadly to +originality. The exclusive woman is seldom of service to the race, and +she is not always a congenial or an agreeable person. She may live so +much to herself that she is uninteresting as well as selfish. She +touches nothing vital excepting books and has nothing else to talk +about.</p> + +<p>One should train herself to make a perfect social circle as far as she +is able.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[93]</a></span></p> + +<p>The display of wealth is never original—only vulgar—and only an inborn +vulgar woman would place her <a name='TC_4'></a><ins title="Was 'so called friends'">so-called friends</ins> at a disadvantage by +entertaining them beyond their power of return.</p> + +<p>It is pathetic to watch the social efforts—"climbing"—of people with +only money "Sans" brains and originality.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[94]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[95]<br />[96]</a></span></p> +<h2><a name="Youth_and_Maturity" id="Youth_and_Maturity"></a>Youth and Maturity.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[97]</a></span></p> +<p>The two attractive periods in a woman's life are girlhood and maturity. +If girlhood is not sufficiently attractive a girl may go into beauty +training for maturity.</p> + +<p>Many women who <a name='TC_5'></a><ins title="Was 'perservere'">persevere</ins> in right thinking and right actions have three +stages of attractiveness, youth, maturity, and old age.</p> + +<p>A face that reflects nothing is seldom beautiful.</p> + +<p>To be beautiful one must think more, love more, in the right way, and +give more in the right way.</p> + +<p>A girl should not try to get old and look old, for age comes to her soon +enough. Girlhood comes but once in a lifetime. One must keep young by<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[98]</a></span> +being young and "thinking young." One must never let tiredness leave its +mark either in the face or poise. Tiredness has never attracted and when +people say that one looks tired, it is time to smile and deny it, for +the "Spot" is beginning to take form. The body should never be permitted +to settle. In Cuba, the women have enormous hips because they sit so +much and are inactive.</p> + +<p>Each muscular movement should reflect health and youth until one feels +hardy and young. One should breathe all the fresh air that she can +consume. Breathing is a vital force which sends blood to fill out +wrinkles and eradicate blemishes and spots.</p> + +<p>The fair, fat, and forty age is no longer dreaded. Like Lillian Russell, +women are learning to keep the face youthful by keeping the illusion of +youth and the belief that she is youthful. If we feel young we look +young.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[99]<br />[100]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="Self_Control" id="Self_Control"></a>Self Control.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[101]</a></span></p> +<p>"Will Power is the rudder of the ship of life."</p> + +<p>A woman's life is about what she makes it. She is her own Fate. The law +that governs one, governs all humanity, because the laws of thought are +the laws of the universe. The mind and body are co-workers. "As a man +thinks, so is he." Great men are those who see to it that the mental +force is stronger than the material, and who "Will" that thought shall +rule their world.</p> + +<p>Every thought stimulates certain brain cells, and exercises some nerve, +tissue or muscle. Man's superiority to animal is due to this mental +action.</p> + +<p>Actions speak louder than words.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[102]</a></span> They are published thoughts. Every +movement of every portion of the body has significance. Picking up a +glass, a cup, or tools and other habits reflect the mind and its +superiority to the physical. There is no surer way to judge people.</p> + +<p>Every face tells a tale and we read character from the physical +form—the head, the backbone, the eye, the mouth, the chin, or hand. The +uplifted eye, the corners of the mouth, the manner in which one eats or +stands, in fact every movement has a special meaning, which may be +easily read.</p> + +<p>The body is like a camera, it tells the truth; it is the outward sign of +inward grace, or vice versa.</p> + +<p>Some one has said "Women's characters are writ large on their faces and +God writes a perfectly plain hand." Because women are more emotional +than men and because they often indulge themselves in emotions, the +signs<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[103]</a></span> are frequently very evident. If we study these signs when we meet +others we may "size them up," and almost know what is passing through +their minds. Because of sexual magnetism men read women more easily than +they read men.</p> + +<p>Mental habits soon become reflective or automatic. In order to read +others we must study ourselves, discover our habits and tendencies and +trace them to their source for correction.</p> + +<p>The time has arrived for new thoughts, new studies, and new habits. +Colored women must be led along the new lines of thinking. Although many +have seemed stupid about some of the abstract studies, they have native +powers that have too long lain dormant.</p> + +<p>Many are permitting their forces to go to waste instead of controlling +them. They must discipline themselves to gain self control over such +habits as<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[104]</a></span> over-eating, coarseness, inertia, anger, and other beauty +destroyers.</p> + +<p>Any excessive emotion debilitates the nervous system and thus affects +good looks.</p> + +<p>Proper poise prolongs life because pressure on certain organs is evenly +distributed and no strain is placed on any particular muscles to cause +<a name='TC_6'></a><ins title="Was 'abcesses'">abscesses</ins> or tumors, etc. Improved circulation of the blood results, and +good circulation spells health. One can think better when poise is +correct for the same reason.</p> + +<p>The conversation of people gives a pretty correct estimate of character. +Complaints from people who are sorry for themselves is one of the +tell-tale evidences of a weak character.</p> + +<p>There is a present day need of knowledge concerning a certain contagion +of emotions. Strong feeling sometimes vibrates that which is hostile and +selfish. One fretful, scolding<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[105]</a></span> woman can upset a neighborhood, to say +nothing of a household.</p> + +<p>One's thoughts should be of love and peace, instead of worry and fear, +lest she may harm others. A woman should be unafraid to conquer life's +problems. She should have faith in herself or she will be a dreamer +instead of a doer. She must be positive instead of negative, but be +positive in the right way which includes the thought and help for +others.</p> + +<p>Voices reflect the mind and soul, so the colored woman should control +the speaking voice.</p> + +<p>Ella Wheeler Wilcox has said,</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">"Some voices affect us like music,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Some voices arouse to action and ambition.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Some voices fill you with despondency.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Some voices irritate like a buzz-saw.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Some voices snap like turtles, and some hiss like serpents."<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p>Control of the speaking voice is one<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[106]</a></span> of the most admired evidences of +self control.</p> + +<p>The power of the mind over the body is said to be greater than any germ. +Compelling the mind to perform some one useful disagreeable act each day +is a splendid habit trainer. The influences that we exert over others +will depend to a great extent upon the control over our own habits as +well as the resistance to influence that others might exert over us.</p> + +<p>One must conquer habits of laziness, untidiness, extravagance, voice, +gestures, clothing, to gain power to concentrate Thought.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[107]<br />[108]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="Her_Relationship_With_Men" id="Her_Relationship_With_Men"></a>Her Relationship With Men.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[109]</a></span></p> +<p>Many girls think that they understand men, but they flatter themselves. +Men do not always understand themselves, and often do things because +they have been led to "the doing," by misunderstanding the girl.</p> + +<p>A man likes to measure up to the opinion of sympathy, strength, +protection, or wickedness, that he imagines a girl has of him. He often +says and does things to please the girl more than to please himself.</p> + +<p>Girls often throw out allurements and temptations especially in the way +of immodest dress and seemingly innocent actions which have been the +downfall of men as well as of themselves. While men have known that the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[110]</a></span> +temptations were deliberately planned, they have not had sufficient will +power to resist. It is an unpardonable crime for a young girl to take +such an advantage for frequently she ruins the career of a man. Such a +girl has two souls to answer for when her own downfall is a sufficient +burden to carry.</p> + +<p>Some girls complain of insults from men. There are so many good reasons +which could be given for this, but girls would indignantly deny that one +reason is that they bring this upon themselves.</p> + +<p>They discuss slippery subjects and personal experiences, and "heart +longings" which call forth the ever present manly (masculine) sympathy. +This often leads to actions afterwards regretted.</p> + +<p>Men are good readers of the public bulletin—a girl's face. They see the +mark of intoxicants, impure thoughts and other weaknesses as if they +were<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[111]</a></span> spelled out on the features, and as they are keenly sensitive to +projected vibrations, they act accordingly.</p> + +<p>Sometimes dusk, or night's darkness is to blame for much mischief. Moral +resistance seems to be at low ebb at this time, and an evidence of +timidity or other feminine weakness may be misunderstood—read +incorrectly as a feminine subterfuge seeking physical contact.</p> + +<p>If one will always expect good from men—the men will generally rise to +it. Try to believe that every man is chivalrous, but do not put his +chivalry to too severe a test.</p> + +<p>Curiosity and a too venturesome spirit may lead to mischief and trouble +too great to be remedied. One must not think or project impure thoughts, +nor must she expect insults and familiarities. Men generally respond to +the (influencing) thought. They feel the thoughts and obey them.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[112]</a></span></p> + +<p>Girls must remember that most men talk. Some will tell on girls if it is +the last act of their lives, although they may not mean to tell. A newly +married man will tell his wife, or another will tell his affinity. +Another may drink too much and grow confidential. Some even talk in +their sleep. One may not think that she will escape; her indiscretions +will follow her to her lifelong regret.</p> + +<p>She should not try to be a woman too early in life, and should not marry +too early. She should study her physique and her constitution. She +should not permit desire and curiosity to control her good sense. Long +illness, suffering, operations, and even early death may result from +premature responsibility. If necessary, she should consult a physician +and look the future squarely in the face.</p> + +<p>Girls do not now mature as early as their mothers and grandmothers did,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[113]</a></span> +and they have not the same power of endurance and resistance, because +times, conditions, and the mode of living have changed.</p> + +<p>Long engagements should not be encouraged. If a man wants a girl he will +wait patiently without any coddling or coaxing. Long engagements are +enervating. Engaged couples feel that they are licensed by public +opinion and they tax their powers in a way that married people would not +dare to do. Too much liberty in long engagements is so often a serious +menace to health and happiness in after marriage relationship. It takes +away the charm and bloom of married life because the man learns to know +his fiancee too well.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[114]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[115]<br />[116]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="The_Religion_of_the_Colored_Girl_Beautiful" id="The_Religion_of_the_Colored_Girl_Beautiful"></a>The Religion of the Colored Girl Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[117]</a></span></p> +<p>God is the perfection in all that is good. God is the best in us. God is +the perfection of all that is beautiful, orderly and harmonious—the 100 +per cent of everything in the world.</p> + +<p>The religion of the colored girl beautiful should teach her that +everything is spiritual—sacred—because everything comes from God.</p> + +<p>It is not sufficient to say, "I am a Christian (I am spiritual—of the +Spirit)" unless one expresses this in countless ways each day. Not only +in kind, helpful actions and gentle speech, but in the work-a-day life.</p> + +<p>The colored girl beautiful expresses her Christianity—her +spirituality—the best, or 100 per cent in her, when she<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[118]</a></span> puts Christ +into every act of her every day life. No act should be too insignificant +for this expression.</p> + +<p>The parables of Jesus teach us that He put His Spirit into the lowest +act, as for instance in the parable of the tent-maker.</p> + +<p>If the colored girl beautiful is truly of His Spirit she will +spiritualize, light up her every day environment with the "Light" that +is in her as a beacon to others as well as to show her appreciation of a +priceless possession.</p> + +<p>Each day she has innumerable opportunities to express the Christ in +her—her spirituality—in the neatness of her apparel, and in the +tidiness of her home and yard. She may take her religion—her +Christ—into the kitchen and express Him and the 100 per cent +spirituality in her cooking, sweeping, and in her dish washing.</p> + +<p>Doing things well expresses the proportion of the Christ—the +perfection<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119">[119]</a></span>—the 100 per cent in us. The more Christ one claims, the +better should one express Christ in his daily labor as every-day +evidence.</p> + +<p>A low daily percentage is a poor record for one who claims spirituality +on Sunday.</p> + +<p>No untidy church, home, or school expresses Christ—for Christ +represents perfection in cleanliness and order. "Cleanliness is next to +Godliness" we are told. Cleanliness shows the spiritual, the God, but +dirt in any form is an expression of the opposite. Dirt under a bed and +a prayer beside it are not compatible, to say the least, unless the +"pray-er" is unable to sweep.</p> + +<p>The Christ principles properly interpreted and applied would +spiritualize a broom and duster and all the utensils of a home or the +tools of a trade.</p> + +<p>Order is an expression of the God-part which makes us more orderly in<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[120]</a></span> +the habits of life if we make pretensions as Christians.</p> + +<p>God is not only all that is perfect in cleanliness, order and harmony, +but He is also all that is perfect in color and sound. God is in the +body and all its parts, the hair, teeth—all.</p> + +<p>As harmony and color are expressions of Spirituality so good taste in +dressing expresses the God in us. By observing and studying Nature one +learns God's taste in color and what is harmonious.</p> + +<p>We should dress to suit the color of the face and the physical +attributes that have been given to us. God has appropriately garbed each +object in Nature. Colored people should study themselves and dress +accordingly. The bright, gay colors are not suitable to all. Many +violate the laws of harmony of color, and unconsciously expose the +ugliest in their appearance by<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[121]</a></span> wearing gaudy, unbecoming, inappropriate +clothes.</p> + +<p>As the harmony of sound comes from God, so an eloquent voice expresses +God. Christians should make their voices more elegant and eloquent. A +loud, coarse voice expresses the opposite of God. Coarseness in thought +and speech is unlike Christ and serves to reveal opposite attributes to +those He represents. Grunting is not spiritual. No one could imagine a +grunt from Christ.</p> + +<p>A graceful motion or gesture also reflects the God in us. One would +never imagine any rough, uncouth gesture from Christ, who is the +"pattern of patterns." Grimaces are not spiritual besides they leave +lines in the face.</p> + +<p>A respect for the rights of others expresses the God in us, as do +obedience and kindness. We are told in positive language by God to +respect our elders and superiors.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[122]</a></span></p> + +<p>Race pride expresses the God in us. The Israelites were the chosen +people because of blood ties. They were proud of their blood. Blood is +thicker than water. The real Christian should be proud of his people; he +should believe in them and uplift them as our Great Example did the +lowly.</p> + +<p>The reverence which expresses God will cause one to respect His house or +any portion of it. A Christian would not handle a Bible carelessly and +would dust it as a privilege, because it is the message from God. A +Christian would not tear or disfigure any sacred book or selection of +music, while to sit upon the sacred rail of the altar or pulpit would be +an unpardonable act of sacrilege.</p> + +<p>The proper care of any article belonging to the Sacred Service is an +expression of Spirituality because it recognizes the article as a medium +of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123">[123]</a></span> spirituality, something which should be reverenced.</p> + +<p>The singing of religious songs in any but a spiritual frame of mind +would be sacrilege just as the taking of the Lord's name in ordinary +conversation or in exclamation is sacrilege.</p> + +<p>The same religion or Spirituality which makes one shout, pray and sing +should prompt a girl not to wear a pale pink or blue satin dress or +other inappropriate fancy decollete dress to worship in God's House. She +cannot worship God and mammon at the same time and she should not be the +means of distracting anyone from spiritual thoughts through envy or +disgust.</p> + +<p>The Christ in a person will prevent her from speech and action which +would hurt the chances or success of another person. God has warned us +that the violation of this rule will surely return evil to the violator. +His<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[124]</a></span> law has many references to this particular self punishment.</p> + +<p>It can not be denied that Divinity has specially endowed the Negro +spiritually, but he does not consistently express it in all the forms +that he might express it, especially in the great Race cause. He is full +of heart, and will give his money, his food, his life, for God—but he +does not yet realize that the same love for God that he puts into his +gifts should be expressed and applied in his daily walks in life as +Christ has expressly commanded.</p> + +<p>We are taught that there are four kinds of Emotional Expression: The +Egotistic which is self and in the interest of self as in joy, rapture +and grief; the Aesthetic which has its expression in Nature and Art; the +Ethical which has its expression in the moral law; the Religious which +expression is in the faith of the Supreme Being.</p> + +<p>As yet the Negro has only fully ex<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[125]</a></span>pressed himself in but two: The +Egotistic, or the self interest, and the Religious, or the faith in the +Supreme Being.</p> + +<p>The Negro undoubtedly brought about his own freedom through his own +spirituality, and faith, and the concentrated, united thought of a whole +people upon one subject—freedom. His remarkable progress since +emancipation has been due to the same faith.</p> + +<p>The Negro should be, and could easily be the spiritual teacher—or +example—of the world. He must not only prove his spirituality but he +must diffuse it, that others may realize its power even if they may not +receive its benefit.</p> + +<p>Christ, the Supreme Example of spirituality was quiet. Other races hold +that ideal, of spirituality. When they see and hear a Negro shout, weep +and pray and then find that same per<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[126]</a></span>son uncouth and dirty, they cannot +reconcile the two conditions, and so doubt the spiritual element which +they call Emotionalism. (They do not remember that the Spirit may be +strong and the flesh weak.)</p> + +<p>These critics cannot believe that an untidy, ignorant man with dirty +teeth stained with tobacco juice can give spiritual advice, and one must +admit that it does look incompatible.</p> + +<p>The race needs more quality in Emotion and less quantity.</p> + +<p>Once convince the rankest Negro hater that the Negro undoubtedly has +spirituality, which is surely advancing him and the race, and a certain +respect will follow.</p> + +<p>Each Negro must consider himself a spiritual missionary whose +appearance, speech, actions and surroundings will reflect the storehouse +of the great Light within.</p> + +<p>The colored ministers who preach<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[127]</a></span> Emotionalism, or what they term the +expression of spirituality should see to it that their flocks +spiritualize their daily lives causing cleaner churches, schools, homes, +yards, wearing apparel and Christian thoroughness in each daily act, +thus showing 100 per cent spirituality.</p> + +<p>The colored ministers who preach Non-Emotionalism should prove that the +power of spiritual expression is being directed along channels which are +helping their flocks and the race in each daily act, not only in race +progress but in convincing doubting Thomases who are blind to the good +traits in the race.</p> + +<p>The so-called Spiritual Power which would cause a woman to run down an +aisle and mash the hats of others, or to throw hand bags and give +similar evidences of strength and emotion could be turned into safer and +more helpful channels—as far as her race is<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[128]</a></span> concerned. A woman +possessed of this power and energy could be a great leader in great +deeds if she were taught how to do this. A shouter who can not help the +race in the battle against prejudice in her special locality, by +expressing her spirituality in each daily word and act as well as +apparel, and surroundings, seems a poor example of spiritual expression.</p> + +<p>The religion that does not help toward the advancement of this +persecuted race, and does not win the admiration and respect of other +races, is not the religion for the colored girl beautiful, of today.</p> + +<p>As a rule colored people expect entirely too much help from God. We must +help ourselves more. Each Negro carries a three-fold burden; first, his +own personal burden; second, the burden of his posterity; and third, the +burden of the race. These follow each<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129">[129]</a></span> other and are dependent upon each +other.</p> + +<p>God has given him physical strength, a strong backbone and strong +shoulders to carry the heavy yoke of the three-fold burden, as well as a +wealth of spirituality to cheer him and keep his heart light, along the +way of life.</p> + +<p>The religion of the Negro should prompt less study of the desires of the +personal Ego, and should teach other nations to respect his race, or, +his religion is not spiritualizing as it could and should spiritualize.</p> + +<p>The religion of the colored girl must be spiritual in every sense, that +it may influence her every thought and act, and make her a true medium +for race progress.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[130]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[131]<br />[132]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="The_School_of_the_Colored_Girl_Beautiful" id="The_School_of_the_Colored_Girl_Beautiful"></a>The School of the Colored Girl Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[133]</a></span></p> +<p>"Education is the process of developing all man's powers, physical, +intellectual, moral, aesthetic and religious for the proper discharge of +the duties of citizenship."</p> + +<p>The school that the colored girl beautiful should attend will have +trees, grass, flowers, shrubs and a garden (even though a small one) +that the girl may keep in close touch with the first teacher—Mother +Nature.</p> + +<p>The care of the school campus as well as the windows, fences, and +surroundings, will reflect the careful spirit of the school.</p> + +<p>The colored girl beautiful will select the school which fights flies, +dirt, filth around back doors; the school which<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[134]</a></span> aims for sanitation +before putting in electric lights; in fact, a school which has health +and sanitation for its hobby.</p> + +<p>She will attend a school that buys books and takes care of them and +which compels the students to read that they may grow into the reading +habit, to pass it along to posterity.</p> + +<p>The progress of the race will depend not upon the "book learning" taught +in schools, but upon the right habits formed and the amount of self +culture that the school inspires.</p> + +<p>The colored girl beautiful will be taught to keep her eyes open and her +mouth shut that she may never betray how little she has really learned +in her preparation for the real school—the school of Life.</p> + +<p>The colored girl beautiful will be taught her duty and relationship to +the race, that she may be a living example of what right education and +right training will do. She will study human<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[135]</a></span> needs and about the +history and progress of her people that she may take her place in the +affairs of her race if called upon, and then bequeath her knowledge and +good qualities to succeeding generations. She will be taught lessons of +self-control and modesty; to respect her womanhood and to conduct +herself that she may command respect from all men and boys including +those of her family.</p> + +<p>She will be taught enough of the world to step into its arena knowing +the evils to shun. She will be taught to hold out a helping hand to +weaker ones who may succumb to evil.</p> + +<p>She will aim to live in pleasant relationship in the school that she may +acquire the habit of living in peace in social circles and neighborhoods +in the scheme of after life.</p> + +<p>She will be taught that politeness is a necessary virtue; that every +form of impoliteness is an evidence of mental<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_136" id="Page_136">[136]</a></span> as well as moral weakness +and that an ill bred colored girl is a curse to the race. She will be +taught the value of silence and that of speech, and will aim to train +herself along both lines for silence is often more effective than +speech.</p> + +<p>She will learn that the aim of education is the aim of religion, that +is, to lift one above the animal. She will endeavor to lift herself to +the highest plane of true womanhood that she may pull others higher.</p> + +<p>Colored schools are supposed to correct the tendencies of children who +have lived under careless, untidy conditions, and to give them ideals of +cleanliness and order.</p> + +<p>She will do her part of the school work cheerfully and thoroughly, that +she may know how work should be done, and how to train others—her +children, perhaps, if so favored.</p> + +<p>The colored girl beautiful will be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_137" id="Page_137">[137]</a></span> taught the value and use of money, +and the relative value of character, education, and other things, which +money cannot buy. She will be taught the care and cleanliness of the +body, simplicity of wearing apparel and appropriate becoming +inconspicuous costumes for church, school, street and home.</p> + +<p>She will be taught that fine clothes can not cover up bad manners, nor +take the place of good character; that it is foolish to buy what one can +not afford; that the expenditure for clothes especially should be gauged +by one's salary and should be appropriate for her particular plane of +life.</p> + +<p>The laws of proportion in the scheme of life must be the hobby of the +school for the colored girl beautiful.</p> + +<p>She will be taught that it is unforgivable not to walk erect, to talk in +good English and in a soft tone of voice.</p> + +<p>As many girls fall into book ignor<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_138" id="Page_138">[138]</a></span>ance after graduation she will be +taught that the aim of education is to give good habits of reading along +with book-knowledge—or else the school has failed to educate a colored +girl beautiful.</p> + +<p>The colored girl beautiful will not aim for book education alone. She +will select a school which will fit her to grace her home from parlor to +kitchen, a school which has thoroughness for its motto.</p> + +<p>She will be taught how to make her dresses and hats, to prepare for the +time when perhaps her allowance for clothes must be divided among +several. Dressmaking is a science as well as an art and enough can be +learned, by those not apt, to save many dollars—especially in the home +that fate favors with children.</p> + +<p>She will be taught a trade, or some means of earning a livelihood, that +she may be prepared, if circumstances<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_139" id="Page_139">[139]</a></span> should force her into the +business arena.</p> + +<p>The school of the colored girl beautiful will so educate her that +motherhood will be her highest ideal in life, the glory of colored +womanhood.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_140" id="Page_140">[140]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_141" id="Page_141">[141]<br />[142]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="The_Home_of_the_Colored_Girl_Beautiful" id="The_Home_of_the_Colored_Girl_Beautiful"></a>The Home of the Colored Girl Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[143]</a></span></p> +<p>The Home of the Colored Girl Beautiful will reflect her. She will help +her parents to buy a home that it may give her family more standing in +the civic community. Taste and simplicity will rule, for the home will +harmonize with the girl. If her parents are not particular about the +trifles in the way of curtains, fences, and yards, then it must be her +special task to make the home represent the beautiful in her, the God, +for all that is beautiful and good comes from God.</p> + +<p>Windows generally express the character of the occupants of a house. The +day has passed when soiled or ragged lace curtains are tolerated. The +cheaper simpler scrims and cheese cloths<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[144]</a></span> which are easily laundered are +now used by the best people.</p> + +<p>The Colored Girl Beautiful, will study the possibilities of her home and +will attempt to secure the restful effects for the eye. Too much +furniture is bad taste. The less one has, the cleaner houses may be +kept.</p> + +<p>The ornate heavy furniture and the upholstered parlor sets are passing +away because they are no longer considered good taste, besides they are +too heavy for cleanliness and are harmful to the health of women who do +their own work.</p> + +<p>Furniture of less expensive model, with simple lines and of less weight +are being selected. These may be paid for cash instead of "on time," as +has been the custom of many people in smaller towns and in the country +districts.</p> + +<p>The furniture sold by the payment<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[145]</a></span> houses always shows its source in its +heaviness and shininess.</p> + +<p>The wall paper should be selected as one would select a color for +clothes, to harmonize with the color of the skin in all lights, and, for +service Color schemes in decoration are being followed and we have no +more stuffy parlors, often closed for days. Instead we have living +rooms, with cleanable furniture, strong but light, entirely suitable for +winter, and cool in summer. No one has a parlor now-a-days. The best +room is generally a living room for the whole family. No more do we see +enlarged pictures which good taste demands should be placed in bed rooms +and private sitting rooms. The ten cent stores have done a great deal of +good in educating the poor white and black alike. These stores have +every where sold small brown art prints of many of the great paintings,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[146]</a></span> +to take the place of the gaudy dust ladened chromos and family pictures.</p> + +<p>Pictures are hung low that they may be thoroughly dusted, as well as to +give a near view of the subject.</p> + +<p>Expensive carpets are also things of the past. Painted and stained +floors with light weight rugs are more generally used. These may be +cleaned and handled without giving the backache to women. Many colored +girls boast of having painted their own floors and woodwork. Much of +this has been learned in the boarding school.</p> + +<p>A tawdry home expresses its mistress as do her clothes.</p> + +<p>Next to the kitchen a fully equipped bath room is now the most important +room in the house. Health and sanitation are the topics of the hour and +a colored girl should know how to put a washer on a faucet as well as +her father or brother.</p> + +<p>A house without books is indeed an<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[147]</a></span> unfurnished home. Good books are the +fad now. They are everywhere in evidence in the up-to-date colored home. +They are exhibited almost as hand painted china was. In every inventory +or collection one finds a Bible, a dictionary, and an atlas.</p> + +<p>The times are changing and the colored people are changing with the +times. Cleanliness and health are the watchwords, and "Order" is +Heaven's first law.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[148]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[149]<br />[150]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="The_Colored_Working_Girl_Beautiful" id="The_Colored_Working_Girl_Beautiful"></a>The Colored Working Girl Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_151" id="Page_151">[151]</a></span></p> +<p>No one should ever scorn a colored working woman. She has been the bone +and sinew of the race. She has built the churches, helped the schools +and has made the race what it is. The pioneer colored woman in most +instances has helped to make the wealth that many colored families +enjoy, today.</p> + +<p>In my travels, on entering Southern towns early in the morning, colored +women are the only women seen on the streets, and sometimes the only +persons. They hurry along often with insufficient clothing in cold and +rain.</p> + +<p>One thinks of the little ones at home who dress themselves and perhaps, +younger children, all without a mother's care, until night when the +tired woman's return to her home to cook, to wash and to iron for her +fam<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_152" id="Page_152">[152]</a></span>ily after a hard day's work, in service.</p> + +<p>In the antebellum days some of the Negro working women may have been +lazy but their descendants of today are not lazy—only fifty years +after. Statistics prove how many homes have been bought through their +labor, how many children are sent to school. Working women pay the +family doctor bills, and support the churches and charities.</p> + +<p>"Every person should work or else she will need a doctor." Habits affect +looks. If one is energetic and happy in doing her work, her face will +reflect the contentment. If one hates work, the face will reflect +discontent, the vital organs will grow flabby and affect the health, and +looks will suffer. Enthusiasm in work stimulates the vital organs, +causes circulation of the blood and makes the eye bright and the skin to +take on a more healthy hue.</p> + +<p>If a girl is obliged to work in a kitchen she should respect her work +and dignify her position. She may be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_153" id="Page_153">[153]</a></span> a "Somebody" washing dishes or +scrubbing a floor, if she does not depreciate her work and if she will +give it status instead of half doing it and complaining about it.</p> + +<p>Only a somebody "can" work well. We cannot get blood out of a turnip, +and neither can a nobody "do" things. A slip-shod, half-hearted working +woman is a curse to the race, because she gives it a bad reputation. She +should put the "somebody" stamp on every portion of daily work and do +the work as if she expected to get a diploma for it each night. She +should not work mechanically or it will be drudgery. She should put +pride and enthusiasm in her work, and let it reflect her inner self.</p> + +<p>It is the duty of every working girl to make her employer adore her for +her personal value and her word. "Do so much better work than you are +paid to do that not only your employers, but their friends will take +note and soon<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_154" id="Page_154">[154]</a></span> you will be paid for more than you do."</p> + +<p>Be ready for the opportunity or crisis which is bound to come in a +change for the better. Stick to a position like a leach. Make it a +bigger and better one than you found it and it will prepare you for +greater openings. Somebody is always watching good workers.</p> + +<p>In her relationship with men the colored working girl beautiful will put +a higher appraisement on herself than may be necessary in the case of +the more fate-favored colored girl who stays under her <a name='TC_7'></a><ins title="Was 'parents roof'">parents' roof</ins>. +Because she works is no reason why she should be cheap, easily attained, +or easily pleased as far as men are concerned.</p> + +<p>She will demand much instead of little from men, that they will offer +more for the privilege of her society. Unless she is engaged she will be +wise to permit no caresses and will try to<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_155" id="Page_155">[155]</a></span> conquer the tendency towards +accepting "petting."</p> + +<p>She will bide her time for the recognition of her worth. Many a servant +girl has seen her posterity lead a town, socially.</p> + +<p>To know how to wait is a great secret; to patiently bide the time when +one may step into the niche that right living and preparation has made +possible. She will try to be contented and will strive for power to +conquer her work, and herself to be ready for the day when opportunity +will open her door to a larger and more responsible life. The beautiful +part about this is that she will be ready to fit into this new condition +of life.</p> + +<p>She should observe, listen and imitate the good when at work. Contact is +often worth more than money. Many valuable lessons have been learned +while "in service." While alone working one has opportunity to "think" +and Thought rules the world.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_156" id="Page_156">[156]</a></span></p> + +<p>A colored working girl is a racial trust. Her race burden is a heavy +one. Her speech, actions and diligence constitute the measure by which +the whole race is judged.</p> + +<p>One need not permit previous family conditions or disadvantages of birth +to hamper her progress in life. No matter what one's people have been or +are, one is not to blame providing she rises above all of it.</p> + +<p>She must "get up" and pull her family up after her, if she can. If this +can not be done she can pull herself up—up—up and be the "somebody" in +the family. She may grow in character, influence and reputation, until +people will forget her ancestry and any objectionable relations as well +as all former environment.</p> + +<p>The Colored Working Girl Beautiful should not fear or worry about what +people may think. She should save her money. A bank account is always +the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_157" id="Page_157">[157]</a></span> most respected thing in the struggle of life.</p> + +<p>Even if some single black deed threatens to blot out the whole of a good +life (in one's own case or in the estimate of the world) she should be +brave enough to live it down. One should put her personality into +everything she does and "do" things worth while. The world moves on so +fast that even the bad is forgotten soon. One may live anything down +nowadays if one tries.</p> + +<p>If she may not go with good people socially, she should stay alone. In +time she will make herself and others believe that this is her +preference.</p> + +<p>She should not push or try to climb; she should bide her time. In the +meantime she might improve herself; she might study the piano, elocution +or singing, and prepare for the day when opportunity will open the +long-closed social door.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_158" id="Page_158">[158]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_159" id="Page_159">[159]<br />[160]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="The_Colored_Woman_Beautiful" id="The_Colored_Woman_Beautiful"></a>The Colored Woman Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_161" id="Page_161">[161]</a></span></p> +<p>In spite of everything to be said on the subject the womanly woman is +always the strongest magnet whether she is called beautiful or not.</p> + +<p>If the colored girl has not been taught by her mother or guardian to +train herself for a beautiful maturity even after she has passed +girlhood, it is not too late to train herself.</p> + +<p>Good begets good, so she will exert herself to make a wide circle of +friends altho she will be careful not to grow too intimate with any. She +may be a real friend without undue intimacy.</p> + +<p>It is conceded that most women "must talk" to someone but too much +intimacy means too much freedom and this often destroys friendship.</p> + +<p>One cannot argue, quarrel, or criticize and still expect real +friendship. One definition of a friend is, "One<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_162" id="Page_162">[162]</a></span> you know all about and +still like." One should not try to "make her friends over" and one never +says disagreeable things to her friends nor does she make unfavorable +comments about their personal attire or weaknesses. She lets her friends +learn all unpleasant things from others. "The links of the chain of +friendship are held by a very delicate thread." The tiniest word, doubt +or action may sever the links.</p> + +<p>The colored woman beautiful will try to love that she may be loved. She +believes that "man is his brother's keeper" and she has ideals and +visions for the race. She has a moral obligation; she reaches out a +helping hand to others. She can mix without being mixed. We can not help +others unless we mix. There must be close contact—touch to lift up +others.</p> + +<p>The colored woman beautiful believes that everyone who gets up must pull +up, or else she will be kept down by the weight of the racial burden. +Each<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_163" id="Page_163">[163]</a></span> one's welfare is closely bound with that of the masses. The race +as a whole must progress and prosper, or else no unit may prosper. The +colored woman beautiful gives the best in her for race advancement. She +works, thinks, and reads to be ready for the need of the tomorrow and +its problems.</p> + +<p>The colored woman beautiful will not carry "chips on her shoulder," +looking for slights and insults. If she carries the thought too strongly +it becomes catching and someone will take up the idea. She will set into +motion lesser vibrations in the minds and bodies of others and the +things she imagines will happen.</p> + +<p>She should resist thoughts of suspicion. She must not think about the +things she wishes to keep secret, for thoughts are contagious.</p> + +<p>The colored woman beautiful does not call another woman "bad" just +because she does not measure up to her ethical code. She must be so +persist<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_164" id="Page_164">[164]</a></span>ent in being good herself that everyone else seems to look and +act good. If God loves the lowest, she can afford to do likewise. She +follows the rule, "Judge not that ye be not judged." She does not make +the mistake of criticising those who have not her strong will power, +lest having stronger projection this unkindness may return swift and +sure to her. To permit the absent to be disparaged or depreciated in her +presence is almost as harmful to herself as if she had said things.</p> + +<p>What is "good" in (another) woman? What is "bad" in (another) woman? +These are two difficult questions to answer and a woman must not judge +by her own standard for herself. Women are inclined to be too narrow in +their viewpoint in judging other women. While one may boast of her +virtue of virtues some women may have a bundle of lesser virtues of +which to boast. It takes more than one virtue to make a good woman. +Many<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_165" id="Page_165">[165]</a></span> women are unduly vain of their escape from the "sin of sins" and +some of these may have known no temptation.</p> + +<p>When one notes how many good friends a so-called "bad" woman may have, +one wonders why it is. Those who understand the law of vibrations +recognize that the woman has projected something of herself which has +brought her a rich return in spite of her one weakness.</p> + +<p>It is a terrible thing to be a bad example along any line to young +girls, so every colored woman should try to conquer herself and live +down any weakness or error. She should give out the best that is in her +that she may be a good example to younger women. She lets the light of +love and purity shine in her face and transform it, and it will reflect +in the faces of others and make her own soul the happier.</p> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_166" id="Page_166">[166]</a></span></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_167" id="Page_167">[167]<br />[168]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="The_Colored_Wife_Beautiful" id="The_Colored_Wife_Beautiful"></a>The Colored Wife Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_169" id="Page_169">[169]</a></span></p> +<p>Married life is a co-partnership and the wife and husband pledge to +mutual help, when they enter into the marriage contract.</p> + +<p>If in their girlhood wives had only studied men instead of giving up all +their time to so-called "loving and courting," there would not be so +much dissatisfaction, heart-ache and complaint after marriage. A girl +should try to select a man with control over himself, over his voice, +his emotions, even the angle of his hat, and then she should practice +control herself, until the two dispositions have become adjusted to each +other.</p> + +<p>The ignorant girl who marries is full of trust and inexperienced +notions. The disillusionments of life seem to come too fast to suit the +majority. Many young wives immediately be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_170" id="Page_170">[170]</a></span>come discouraged or desperate +and fall out of the ranks by the wayside of the matrimonial highway, +without trying to live up to their end of the contract, or even +respecting their own vows at the altar.</p> + +<p>"True loving is giving the best within us." When we have company we give +to them the best food, the best linen, the best china and silver-ware +that we own. Yet to those we are pledged to love and cherish we give +anything, and wonder why in return we have failed in receiving love and +all that goes with it.</p> + +<p>A divorce is a terrible "something." It is a blight to children and +often means their ruin or the blasting of their future. If a woman has +children she should try to endure her lot until they are grown. In the +meantime she may prepare herself for a beautiful maturity and an +entrance into the commercial world or another field of activity.</p> + +<p>Of course, if one's husband deserts her there is nothing else to do but +let<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_171" id="Page_171">[171]</a></span> him go, but if he clings to her and the home, she should use the +protection that his name gives to her until she is sure that she can +buffet the world alone.</p> + +<p>In the larger field of public life a woman without the protection of a +husband's name has a hard lot if she has physical or other attractions. +Widows of both kinds are always under suspicion. If one is lighthearted +and enjoys even innocent pleasure, she may be called a "good timer," or +"fast," and this may injure her advancement in the arena of business +life.</p> + +<p>The protection of the name of any kind of a man, bad, no account, or +cruel, is better than the suffering from cruel suspicions which often +blight the efforts of a sensitive woman, who perhaps in her loneliness +has turned for sympathy this way and that way, until she concludes that +if she suffers in name she may as well be "in the game," and chooses the +wrong way.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_172" id="Page_172">[172]</a></span></p> + +<p>If a woman has money it is quite different. People fawn upon her and she +is less liable to snubbing if Dame Gossip should assail her.</p> + +<p>The first duty of a wife is to keep healthy. Even if she is ailing she +must not complain unless through mental suggestion she desires to +increase her ailments, real or imaginary. She must earnestly endeavor to +discover the cause of the alleged ailment and remove it.</p> + +<p>The colored wife beautiful of today must be a composite woman because +the colored man of today is many sided. They call woman a "creature of +moods" but most men may easily be called susceptible and changeable +creatures, when it comes to the attractions of the opposite sex.</p> + +<p>Today it may be a pretty face which allures him; tomorrow a fine +conversationalist, or a musical person may attract. The next day a woman +with tremendous vitality may charm him.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_173" id="Page_173">[173]</a></span> So he wanders, but he does not +intend to stray. One or several streaks in his make-up have been +satisfied, but his wife still stands upon her pedestal as the woman who +bears his name.</p> + +<p>The up-to-date wife realizes his susceptibility (as a man) and is +prepared. She bides her time when like the prodigal, he will surely +return, perhaps mentally and morally purified and a wiser, if a sadder +man.</p> + +<p>If a woman loves her husband and desires to keep him for herself and +family, she must train herself for her many varied duties including +attractiveness, which is a real duty.</p> + +<p>If she thinks that some other woman has her husband's affection, her +thoughts help her to make this so. If she voices the suspicion she +fertilizes the soil and aids the growth or she may crystallize and give +form to rumor.</p> + +<p>Even if there is ground for such a suspicion the up-to-date wife would +not admit it to herself or voice the fact.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_174" id="Page_174">[174]</a></span></p> + +<p>"Man's love is of man's life a part, 'tis woman's whole existence."</p> + +<p>The inexperienced wives forget that they cannot satisfy every mood of a +man without study or effort, unless they are remarkably gifted. Many a +wife has neglected her mind, body and powers and when some woman with +developed powers enters her marriage orbit, she flies off at a tangent, +admits defeat and gets a divorce without putting forth an effort to win +back the husband who is often worth saving.</p> + +<p>It is humiliating to admit, "I have lost my husband!" A wife should +never admit it, even in thought.</p> + +<p>Many a man does not intend to stray and loves his wife but he has been +carried off his feet just for the moment.</p> + +<p>There are Keeley cures to save men, why not husband cures to save homes, +especially those with children whose futures are at stake.</p> + +<p>I know several colored women who<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_175" id="Page_175">[175]</a></span> have had good ground for doubting +their husband's fidelity who have never allowed the men to know that +they have doubted them.</p> + +<p>One wife made a study of "the woman in the case" and threw her and her +husband together in her home until the man was satiated. In the meantime +she studied herself and the woman to see what it was that attracted her +husband. Then she went into training for the match—war—if it should +come to that—in attractiveness, and she won without telling her secret.</p> + +<p>If a wife will give a man time and will play the attractive game as she +did before marriage, her husband will soon turn his face homeward, and +will wonder what the other charm was.</p> + +<p>Many men are attracted by youth alone and after youth has flown they are +not interested. A wife should study the fancies of her husband if she +desires to hold him, and then begin<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_176" id="Page_176">[176]</a></span> work upon herself, to hold her +youthful looks.</p> + +<p>Wives must prepare for the dangerous age which they say comes to a woman +between thirty-five and forty-five, and to a man from forty to fifty, +when both are accused of being attracted to younger faces, and when they +do foolish things. A wife must strengthen herself, lest she stray, and +cultivate her own attractive powers lest her husband should incline to +stray.</p> + +<p>A man does not age as quickly as a woman. At fifty a woman is supposed +to be on her decline while a man is in his prime at fifty.</p> + +<p>It is a woman's own fault if, at forty the lines in her face turn down +and if her hair and teeth are all gone. If she is a "nagger" the +reflection will appear in her face. If she has permitted household cares +to swamp her, and reflect themselves in her face and body, she has no +one to blame but herself.</p> + +<p>Many a woman has attracted her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_177" id="Page_177">[177]</a></span> husband through her singing, +conversation, or other accomplishments and after marriage has permitted +these to decline, and has not lived up to the ideal that she gave him +before marriage.</p> + +<p>A wife should ask herself if she is living up to the ideal she suggested +before she married, or if she is a disappointment, before she questions +her husband's conduct.</p> + +<p>Some wives think that their morality in wifehood is all sufficient. A +woman may boast of her "virtue" until doom's day, but "if her soul is +small and her heart stingy" her example is not worthy of imitation—for +she is only good to herself. She has no way of proving the ownership of +the "virtue of virtues." It takes many virtues to make one "good," in +the real sense of the word.</p> + +<p>A colored wife should not be discontented without good cause nor should +she complain of monotony when she may choose so many helpful +diversions,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_178" id="Page_178">[178]</a></span> and may help to make others happy.</p> + +<p>Every colored wife who has not borne children, or a wife who has lost +children owes a duty to the children of others.</p> + +<p>In fact, these owe a greater debt to <a name='TC_8'></a><ins title="Was 'posterity then'">posterity than</ins> the mother. Such +women should not live for themselves alone, lest they canker. Contact +with youth infuses youthful thoughts and enthusiasm, and keeps a woman's +heart young, and if her heart is young her face will reflect this mental +attitude.</p> + +<p>There are thousands of children with living mothers who still need +"mothering." One may work out her own youth and beauty culture while +"mothering" a little one. It is worth a trial as a youth stimulant.</p> + +<p>There are four great laws given to a wife:</p> + +<p>"Brace up! Brush up! Clean up! Look up!"</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_179" id="Page_179">[179]<br />[180]</a></span></p> + +<h2><a name="The_Colored_Mother_Beautiful" id="The_Colored_Mother_Beautiful"></a>The Colored Mother Beautiful.</h2> + +<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_181" id="Page_181">[181]</a></span></p> +<p>When a woman enters into the marriage contract—into the partnership of +home making—it is understood that parenthood is to be the chief aim and +hope.</p> + +<p>If a man is good enough to marry and to contribute his support, he is +good enough to be a father or else he should not have been selected.</p> + +<p>A woman who marries and does not intend to have children is merely an +object of convenience who has sold herself.</p> + +<p>To assume the position of colored motherhood is the greatest privilege +and responsibility that can come to any woman in this age.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful carries a heavy burden—the weight of +future generations of a handicapped, persecuted people. She may bless or +curse<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_182" id="Page_182">[182]</a></span> each succeeding generation; she may change race history; she may +make a more beautiful race with the beauty that comes from beauty of +character and right living.</p> + +<p>What a privilege to carve the destiny of a race! How glorious to look +into the future and see lines of ancestry influenced and advanced by her +thought and example, to see her stamp of personality upon a posterity +which will point to her in pride and thankfulness!</p> + +<p>The time has come when each colored girl must prepare herself for this +rare privilege, when she must distribute her powers and talents for race +good.</p> + +<p>Whatever the colored mother is, millions of colored children will be. A +colored mother lives not only for herself and for her own children, but +she must live for the race. A colored mother is a success as she +measures up to her relation and obligation to the race.</p> + +<p>Negro children of all children need mothers who are strong spiritually,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_183" id="Page_183">[183]</a></span> +physically, and intellectually. Enough colored children have been born +under bad or careless conditions. The child born under bad conditions +can not be expected to hold his own among other children.</p> + +<p>No woman has a right to blight the future of her race. Not even her body +may be abused—this beautiful casket—the treasure house of future +souls. Any crime that she commits against herself or her body she +commits against the race.</p> + +<p>Almost any colored mother would lay down her life for her children but +she must have a wider vision into the scheme of life and the world, and +must deliberately plan to make her grand-children and great +grand-children healthier, happier and more useful.</p> + +<p>While it is admitted that heredity is not all, yet inherited tendencies +have great influence.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful must be a living example of all that is +pro<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_184" id="Page_184">[184]</a></span>gressive. She must study more about the laws of heredity, and child +culture to prepare the child for its race battle, unhampered by +inherited mental or physical tendencies.</p> + +<p>The "gray matter" in the colored woman's head is the same as the gray +matter in any woman's head. Through the exercise of will power she may +conquer inherited tendencies and even command nature as other women are +doing.</p> + +<p>There are many books which will guide and instruct a prospective mother +who should read and learn all she can on the laws of reproduction. She +should absorb this knowledge that she may be able to impart it to less +informed women.</p> + +<p>The early Romans are said to have surrounded a prospective mother with +examples of courage and strength.</p> + +<p>The mother of Napoleon is an example of the power of pre-natal +direction. She is said to have studied mili<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_185" id="Page_185">[185]</a></span>tary tactics and to have +visited battlefields. The mother of Michael Angelo is said to have +watched the painters of pictures in the Cathedral. The result was the +greatest artist of the time.</p> + +<p>As mental impressions are as active during the night as in the day, no +prospective mother should carry unpleasant thoughts to bed. The +sub-conscious mind receives the bad thought at bed time and acts all +night under this influence. Its forces affect the same as thoughts +during the day.</p> + +<p>The prospective mother should read good books, think right, live right, +and keep a pure mind and heart, thus developing a deeper nature to +bequeath.</p> + +<p>More than anything else, the prospective colored mother must practice +self-control. All worry is poisonous. Strong thoughts of disgust and +hatred if not controlled during the pre-natal period are liable to leave +disastrous affects. The aim should be to train<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_186" id="Page_186">[186]</a></span> herself to change any +thought which will create a physical disturbance.</p> + +<p>Mothers who fail to control their tempers, passions, and indulgences too +often weep bitter tears as they see in their off-spring the consequences +of their own wrong doing.</p> + +<p>Someone has said: "Parents transmit deviltry to children and then punish +them for it." Instance after instance of such cruelty could be cited. +Why should parents expect their children to be better than they?</p> + +<p>Anger causes a chemical change which acts like poison to the system of +an adult. It affects the heart, stomach, blood, and nerves and causes +many other disturbances.</p> + +<p>"Often the unborn child's little organism is flooded with shocks of +passion and disturbed by nervous movements which cause unsound mind and +body."</p> + +<p>Altho inheritance comes from two lines of ancestry, the prospective<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_187" id="Page_187">[187]</a></span> +mother may be able to control and supervise the tendencies from her +line. She must do all in her power before the birth of a child to sway +it for good. She may then save herself years of worry and sorrow and the +race an unworthy example.</p> + +<p>Before and after birth the colored mother beautiful will cultivate and +give out the best in her. No contrary or selfish thought will be +permitted because of the bad effect upon the child. These unpleasant +things will enter soon enough into its life. The mother will faithfully +endeavor to be an example to her children in thought, poise, speech, +personal appearance and in all forms of cleanliness and politeness.</p> + +<p>A child's ideal seldom goes higher <a name='TC_9'></a><ins title="Was 'that that'">than that</ins> of its mother. Children +very accurately reflect the thought of their parents.</p> + +<p>How can the child have high ideals and elevating thoughts unless the +mother has them?<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_188" id="Page_188">[188]</a></span></p> + +<p>Taste is said to be a faculty of the soul. The mother bequeaths her +taste.</p> + +<p>How can the colored mother beautiful expect her children to have habits +of observation and appreciation of the beautiful in Nature, Art, +Science, Music and Literature, unless the mother has "walked and talked +with nature, has heard the tongues in trees and brooks" as Shakespeare +has said, and has pointed these out to the child?</p> + +<p>If the starlight, the moonlight, the dawn, the sunrise, the sunset, the +blue sky, the tranquility of a summer day or the grandeur of a storm +have no response in the mother's soul, then how can a child be expected +to lift its eyes and see the beautiful everywhere, every day and absorb +the benefits from such communion?</p> + +<p>The physical feeding of a child occurs but three times a day but the +spiritual, mental and moral feeding goes on all the rest of the time. +Children should be fed ideals of thought and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_189" id="Page_189">[189]</a></span> affection to counteract +the evil effect of thoughts of passion.</p> + +<p>The colored child should be taught to think and should be given +opportunity for a quiet hour for self communion and self entertainment. +It should be taught to live a period of solitude so that in after life +it may not always be compelled to hunt around for entertainment and +excitement.</p> + +<p>How can the child be expected to love reading if the mother does not +read to it?</p> + +<p>How can the child love music if the mother does not play or sing to it +or teach it songs?</p> + +<p>How many nights are wasted that might be spent in giving colored +children ideals of home life and right habits in reading and home study?</p> + +<p>Colored children have been left alone too much.</p> + +<p>How many of them have a children's hour? How many have been given +something to think about? How many<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_190" id="Page_190">[190]</a></span> spend their spare moments in +reading? How many can recite poems or give quotations from the master +writers?</p> + +<p>The mothers themselves must put some time in exerting their minds in +reading and thinking with a view towards mentally improving the next +generation. They must observe and note what is passing on in the great +world. History is being made every day. How can the child resist the +desires of the lower nature when its mother has tantrums? The colored +mother must refuse to express passion. A mother can not shame or beat +her child into gentle manners when she is rough or coarse.</p> + +<p>How can the child be careful and controlled in speech if the mother has +not the power of expressing herself in good English. Language is too +powerful a weapon in reaching, compelling and swaying the feelings of +others and in winning friends—to be neglected.</p> + +<p>Children always betray home train<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_191" id="Page_191">[191]</a></span>ing. If they have not been trained +properly as they are not adepts in dissembling and they reflect their +mothers in all their thought, speech and actions.</p> + +<p>The mother who is strict in her own conduct and who pays careful +attention to the home conduct of her children will seldom be ashamed of +their deportment. Good habits may not be assumed at a moment's notice. +The good breeding of parents is very truly reflected in the manners of +their children.</p> + +<p>It is sad to have the children learn the laws of politeness and good +breeding outside the home, and to watch them assume that which should be +innate.</p> + +<p>It is sad to hear little children lie about their home training +pretending that "My mother makes me do this or that" when they know that +the mother has failed to make a strong point of this particular fault.</p> + +<p>It is sadder still to hear colored chil<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_192" id="Page_192">[192]</a></span>dren say, "I can't." The colored +mother should put success in the child's thought and teach it to believe +in himself and his race. It is the duty of every mother to preach +success and one's duty to aim to excel along all lines.</p> + +<p>How can the child be clean and love cleanliness when its mother is +habitually untidy and slovenly? The colored mother beautiful would no +more exhibit herself unclean than naked. She would no more walk slovenly +than to dress slovenly. If a mother wears unclean clothes, has unclean +thoughts or unclean manners, her children will reflect her.</p> + +<p>How can a child hold her head up and her back straight when her mother +slouches around and forgets that her body belongs to God as well as her +soul.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful makes a point of teaching her child to be +true and helpful to the race, and to speak up<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_193" id="Page_193">[193]</a></span> for the good points and +keep silent about the weaknesses when before other races. Every race has +strong and weak points.</p> + +<p>She should take part in efforts for the advancement of the race. No one +can lift the race unless he stays in it. A child should be taught not to +depreciate the race any more than it would itself.</p> + +<p>No one is so big and strong that he can exist alone. All of us are +dependent to a degree. Each one will need friends. There are no friends +which mean so much to us as those of our own race.</p> + +<p>The percentage of physical deformities in colored children is lessening. +Colored mothers are learning to study children's faces and bodies in +order to change and correct their physical defects. Bowed and weak legs, +outstanding ears, misshapen mouths, noses and teeth are being corrected +according to scientific rules. Then, too, they are training children to +do things to<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_194" id="Page_194">[194]</a></span> improve their own physical defects without—of +course—causing them to be over conscious.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful is the health officer of the race as well +as her own posterity. It is her duty to see to it that her children have +clean bodies inside and outside. She will see to it that in her +neighborhood there will be more regard for health, drainage, and other +sanitary conditions. She will pursue the deadly fly and cause this pest +and all vermin to be eradicated.</p> + +<p>She will study up on the kinds and amounts of food to give children that +they may not be fed the coarse, greasy food which coarsens the instinct, +or may make them gluttonous, which will abuse the stomach and cause +unnatural heat that may wreck them morally. Instead, she advocates the +light brain forming food to lift them above the dominant animal +tendencies.</p> + +<p>She controls the child's play which is so necessary to health and which +at<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_195" id="Page_195">[195]</a></span> the present day aims for educational results.</p> + +<p>A colored girl's estimate and idea of colored womanhood comes from her +mother.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful will not give the best to strangers in +preference to home folks, nor will she expect her daughter to receive +politeness from other boys and men when her brothers and men in the +house keep their hats on, smoke and talk in loud disrespectful tones +before her.</p> + +<p>A colored mother will teach her daughter to command respect from all +boys and men and not to capitulate in any way. To do this she will teach +her daughter that she must conquer or control her lower nature and not +permit privileges with her body or her given name. Her conduct at home +and on the street must also command this. Her daughter will no more use +the Lord's name in exclamation than any other profanity. She must be +taught<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_196" id="Page_196">[196]</a></span> not to hang out or talk outside of the windows.</p> + +<p>She must be taught that she is never to stand and talk to men on the +street, also that she must not continue a conversation with a man or boy +who shows he has no respect for her. She will demand a respectful +attitude if she is a good girl or else she should excuse herself from +further conversation and association.</p> + +<p>The daughter of the colored woman beautiful will be taught to expect +boys and men to tip their hats in meeting and parting, and she will not +encourage them to sit in her presence if she stands unless they are her +elders, superiors, or invalids. If necessary she will exaggerate the +importance of these seemingly small courtesies to impress them upon +other younger and less thoughtful girls.</p> + +<p>Such a daughter will be taught to count for something besides clothes +and looks. She will pass an intemperate or<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_197" id="Page_197">[197]</a></span> immoral man as she would +something polluted, for both are irresponsible and she may suffer from +even a moment's contact.</p> + +<p>This daughter must be taught not to marry for support or for money. That +is selfish and cowardly. Love should be the basis of marriage because +after the honeymoon is past there are responsibilities, troubles, +sorrows and self-sacrifice which need the stimulation of the "Love +light."</p> + +<p>The daughter of the colored woman beautiful will aim to marry a man +mentally and physically fit to be the father of her children. An +immoral, vile-tongued, untruthful or diseased father is a curse to his +race. It is her duty and aim to improve racial stock.</p> + +<p>This daughter will study the ethics of the period of engagement and will +not abuse or destroy the mysterious charm which belongs alone to the +early period of wife-hood.</p> + +<p>A girl should be taught the duties of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_198" id="Page_198">[198]</a></span> married life; to fulfil the +beautiful aim of motherhood should be her ambition and her daily prayer.</p> + +<p>Boys, also, get their estimate of colored womanhood from their mothers.</p> + +<p>A whipping, striking, scolding, threatening, "shut-up" mother presents +him a wrong view point of real motherhood.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful will teach her son to respect colored +womanhood and to show this respect in every word and action. He is not +supposed to know the "wheat from the tare." To any woman in all the +small courtesies of life he will reflect his mother's home training. He +will be taught to look up to, and to show special respect and reverence +for the great women and men of the race.</p> + +<p>Even in the way he puts on or takes off his hat he reflects his mother.</p> + +<p>If a colored boy is expected to tip his hat to any woman, he should tip +it to the women of his mother's race.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_199" id="Page_199">[199]</a></span></p> + +<p>If it is expected that he should stand erect before any woman, he should +before the women of his mother's race. Off will go his hat, if even +asked a question. His voice, his eyes, his backbone, his heels, all +reflect his mother and her training. In spite of protest he will never +sit if a woman is standing unless he is ill or a cripple. Especially +does he exhibit the mother training he has received from his manner in +his actions to colored women.</p> + +<p>If he is expected to speak respectfully to any woman he should to the +women of his mother's race.</p> + +<p>If he works faithfully for any woman who employs him he should work +faithfully for a woman of his mother's race.</p> + +<p>When he marries he should select a woman of his mother's race—a Colored +Woman. His mother will teach him that a good wife is about the best +thing in the world.</p> + +<p>He will be taught to support and trust his wife as he did his mother +and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_200" id="Page_200">[200]</a></span> never doubt her until he has positive proof that she is unworthy. +He will never publicly put another woman before his wife if he lives +with her. As long as a wife bears his name and stays under his roof she +is entitled to the respect that her title is supposed to carry. He would +never go about complaining of his wife for that is small and cowardly. +He will tip his hat as gallantly to his wife as to another woman and +kiss her with uncovered head to show his respect to the woman he has +chosen to bear his name.</p> + +<p>The son of the colored mother beautiful will not smoke in the presence +of his wife or friends unless he is sure it is unobjectionable and he +should regard this as a privilege rather than a masculine right. He will +be taught to wear his coat at table and regard it also as a privilege if +he appears otherwise. He will be taught that it is unmanly to tattle and +gossip.</p> + +<p>He will be taught that it is vulgar<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_201" id="Page_201">[201]</a></span> and low to quarrel especially in +the home. No man will strike a woman no matter what the provocation +might be any more than it would have been right for his father to strike +his mother. A man who is unable to control himself in anger is a weak +man and is hardly fit to be a husband, much less father. Belonging to a +race full of impulse and emotion he must be taught to control his +emotions as he would his appetite. Culture and manliness are really +restraint.</p> + +<p>He will be taught to remember the vital sex difference in strength and +physique and will not permit a woman to lift or reach unnecessarily—not +even to help with his coat. He will not preach a double standard of +morality for the men and women unless he practices what he preaches and +has always been pure.</p> + +<p>Early in the boy's life the colored mother beautiful will teach him to +keep as pure in thought and deed as girls<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_202" id="Page_202">[202]</a></span> are expected to be. He will +be given a right idea of the sacred sex organs and will be taught their +health—value and the price of their abuse. Self mastery will be the +watchword in thought, even in sleep and recreation.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful will teach her son not to lie and steal or +to use intoxicants and profane language. She will teach him to keep both +his inward and outward body clean. She shall insist that he keep his +lips "in" while his chest will be out. The son will be taught the value +of a good name and that fondness for work is one of the best +recommendations in the world. He will be taught not to scorn or neglect +his chores and to help his mother in the housework, not only because it +is his duty but because it will prepare him for the duties of married +life when he may be able to help his wife or instruct her if it should +be necessary.</p> + +<p>The colored mother beautiful will<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_203" id="Page_203">[203]</a></span> teach her son to be a little man and +not to receive "penny tips" like a beggar. He should be taught to do +neighborly favors without pay, after first asking his mother for +permission. If he must have money let him work for wages that he may be +his own business boss. He should never be permitted to ask any one but +his parents for pennies and he should be encouraged not to expect or +accept them.</p> + +<p>A boy should be expected to walk with a graceful carriage and present an +attractive personal appearance in the way of clothes, teeth, hair and +nails as well as a girl.</p> + +<p>Early in life he should be taught to invest in a savings bank, to get +the saving habit.</p> + +<p>The habit of reading good books should be made a part of his daily work +as a preparation for the idle hour when he would otherwise seek +excitement and harmful association.</p> + +<p>A boy should be taught the duties of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_204" id="Page_204">[204]</a></span> married life and what to expect +from a good wife.</p> + +<p>He should be warned of pitfalls and how vicious girls and women play +upon men's physical weaknesses for selfish purposes. Any abuse or excess +may ruin his health and happiness.</p> + +<p>He should be taught to appreciate the qualities in a girl which will +make congeniality during the long married life which has trials of which +courtship never dreams.</p> + +<p>He should be taught to seek and appreciate good, respectable girls and +to associate with the best people.</p> + +<p>If the day should come to the colored Mother Beautiful when after years +of patient sacrifice and toil, all her hopes and dreams are cruelly +dashed to earth and the child so carefully nurtured refuses to do her +duty to parent and race and will not help to make the race and world +better by having lived in it, or, when perhaps, the child is a disgrace +to her parents and the race, the mother<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_205" id="Page_205">[205]</a></span> must conceal her agony and +grief and still keep a serene countenance.</p> + +<p>In silent meditation she looks back over all the years in which she has +tried to rear a creditable member of the race and society. If, after +honest review, down in her heart she can truthfully say, "I have raised +my child to the best of my knowledge," then she may leave the rest in +the hands of the "Creator." Perhaps he will reward her efforts, in a +future generation, while she is yet on earth.</p> + +<p>A disappointed colored Mother Beautiful does not envy other Mothers nor +does she criticise their daughters.</p> + +<p>Suffering opens the door to a wider vision in life and if she looks +around she will find forgetfulness in helping others. It is never too +late to begin.</p> + +<p>Perhaps the Colored Mother Beautiful will be spared to see the day when +her children leave the home honorably. Although it almost breaks her +heart because she is no more to be the guiding light and comforter, she +yields the scep<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_206" id="Page_206">[206]</a></span>tre of authority gracefully and willingly and steps into +the background. She may see a rough voyage ahead for the young life +travelers, but she may not interfere nor advise these loved ones unless +asked. Even then she remembers that experience is the greatest teacher +and strengthener and that it is best for them to walk life's journey +alone.</p> + +<p>The peace and contentment that comes from having done her whole duty +gives her a spiritual beauty of countenance that comes from the other +world; the habit of right living through right thought, reflects in her +face and gives her a physical beauty that comes in no other way.</p> + +<p>At the last, the Still Small Voice Whispers, "Well done, thou good and +faithful servant of a persecuted race. You have done what you could. No +one can do more. Receive your eternal reward," and the face is illumined +with the beauty that shall endure forever.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<div class="transnote"> +<h3>Transcriber's note<a name="tnotes" id="tnotes"></a></h3> + +<p> +The following changes have been made to the text:</p> +<p><a href='#TC_1'>Page 13</a>: Was 'Laws' (<b>Law</b> Of Attraction—Vibrations)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_2'>Page 25</a>: Was 'pyschically' (to the Negro is himself. So much in him is hidden, spiritually, intellectually, <b>psychically</b> and physically, that he is a vast unexplored mine.)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_3'>Page 66</a>: Was 'wont' (practice of deep breathing is invaluable in the matter of resistance, and will back up the "I <b>won't</b>", "I won't", "I won't", "Hands off", "Hands off". A girl must hold her fists tightly and resist.)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_4'>Page 93</a>: Was 'so called friends' (The display of wealth is never original—only vulgar—and only an inborn vulgar woman would place her <b>so-called friends</b> at a disadvantage by entertaining them beyond their power of return.)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_5'>Page 97</a>: Was 'perservere' (Many women who <b>persevere</b> in right thinking and right actions have three stages of attractiveness, youth, maturity, and old age.)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_6'>Page 104</a>: Was 'abcesses' (distributed and no strain is placed on any particular muscles to cause <b>abscesses</b> or tumors, etc. Improved circulation of the blood results, and good circulation spells health. One can think better when poise is)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_7'>Page 154</a>: Was 'parents roof' (a higher appraisement on herself than may be necessary in the case of the more fate-favored colored girl who stays under her <b>parents' roof</b>. Because she works is no reason why she should be cheap, easily attained,)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_8'>Page 178</a>: Was 'posterity then' (In fact, these owe a greater debt to <b>posterity than</b> the mother. Such women should not live for themselves alone, lest they canker. Contact)</p> +<p><a href='#TC_9'>Page 187</a>: Was 'that that' (A child's ideal seldom goes higher <b>than that</b> of its mother. Children very accurately reflect the thought of their parents.)</p> +</div> + + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's The Colored Girl Beautiful, by E. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Colored Girl Beautiful + +Author: E. Azalia Hackley + +Release Date: February 21, 2010 [EBook #31340] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE COLORED GIRL BEAUTIFUL *** + + + + +Produced by Suzanne Shell, Carla Foust and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) + + + + + +Transcriber's note + + +Minor punctuation errors have been changed without notice. Printer +errors have been changed and are listed at the end. + + + + +The Colored Girl Beautiful + + + + + THE + + COLORED GIRL + + BEAUTIFUL + + + By + + E. AZALIA HACKLEY + + Author of "A Guide in Voice Culture" and + "Public School Lessons in Voice Culture." + + BURTON PUBLISHING COMPANY + PUBLISHERS + KANSAS CITY, MISSOURI + + + + + Copyrighted 1916 + By E. Azalia Hackley + + + + +Dedication. + + +To colored women in whom I have faith and to colored children whom I +love, I send this little message. + + + + +Foreword. + + +This volume has been compiled from talks given to girls in colored +boarding schools. The first talk was given at the Tuskegee Institute at +the request of the Dean of the Girls' Department. + +It was an impromptu talk after an hour's notice. Just before the Dean +closed the door to leave me alone with the girls, I repeated my +question, "What shall I talk about?" The reply was, "Tell them anything +you think they should know. They will believe an experienced woman like +you who travels and knows the world and life." + +As I looked at the sea of faces, "wanting to know," and as I thought of +all they had to learn, the vastness of all of it almost overpowered me. +"May I sit down, girls? Now, what shall we talk about that is +interesting to every one of you?" + +"Would you like to talk about Love--real Love?" "Yes, yes," came the +answer. "Would you like to talk about Beauty--real Beauty?" "Yes! Yes!" +they answered and the chairs were pulled forward. For forty minutes we +had a heart to heart talk. The dean and teachers had perhaps told the +girls the same words, but the message seemed to come more directly to +them from one who had daily contact with the great, busy world. + +The talks were very informal and personal and as the girls asked +questions the thought came to me to jot down the points, that similar +talks might be given to the girls in other schools. Then came the +request, "You come so seldom, can you print the talks?" Much of the +talks could not be printed because many of the questions and answers +were personal. + +If I had a daughter I would desire that she should know these things and +more, that she might be a beacon light to her home and to the race. As I +have not been blessed with a daughter, I send these thoughts to the +daughters of other colored women, hoping that among them there is some +new thought worthy of a racial "Amen." + + E. AZALIA HACKLEY. + + Chicago, Ill., August, 1916. + + + + +CONTENTS + + + The Future Page 17 + + The Colored Child Beautiful 23 + + The Colored Girl Beautiful 41 + + Laws Of Attraction--Vibrations 55 + + Love 61 + + Personal Appearance 71 + + Deep Breathing 79 + + Originality 85 + + Youth And Maturity 97 + + Self Control 101 + + Her Relationship With Men 109 + + The Religion Of The Colored Girl Beautiful 117 + + The School Of The Colored Girl Beautiful 133 + + The Home Of The Colored Girl Beautiful 143 + + The Colored Working Girl Beautiful 151 + + The Colored Woman Beautiful 161 + + The Colored Wife Beautiful 169 + + The Colored Mother Beautiful 181 + + + + +The Future. + + +The beautiful part about the colored race in America, is the future. As +a mixed race we are undeveloped. We may become whatever we WILL to +become. + +This race is a growing people. The future is veiled but it may reveal +some strange things to the world. What opportunities there are for +leadership! If there were only some ways to "squelch" the fakers and +arouse the dreamers! + +If each would only think out a different plan for race advancement, +there would always be followers. Some would be attracted in one way and +others reached in another way, and so carry lines of thought. + +The gardener is aiming towards better vegetation. Scrubs and dwarfs are +sacrificed totally to produce a more perfect plant. + +The horse breeder, any animal breeder, the bird fancier, all aim to get +a better breed of stock in each generation. + +The cry of the hour is "A better breed of babies." As it takes several +generations to breed a prize winner, it is time for the colored race to +look into these things and prepare for the future colored child, +handicapped as it will be. Nature needs assistance in this. + +Attractiveness in appearance is a strong factor in success. A pleasing, +even, charming personal appearance may be cultivated. + +The mind--the gray matter--either fills the body with life or beauty, or +it destroys life and beauty, according to the concentration of thought, +and resulting habits. + +If one were to ask, "Can a leopard change its spots," the reply must +always be, "No." But if one were to ask if the Negro could change his +appearance, through himself, his own will power, the answer would be, +"Yes," because the Negro has a thinking brain. He may become as +attractive as he wills to become. + +As his taste and ideas of beauty conform to the accepted, so will he +grow like these ideals and standards. + + + + +The Colored Child Beautiful. + + +Every baby is beautiful to its mother. Every colored baby is generally, +only cunning or cute to many of the white race who have their own ideal +of baby beauty, which depends mainly upon a white skin. + +Beauty is a matter of personal opinion. To a savage African, a baby with +a black skin and flat nose is the ideal. + +To a Chinese, a plump, yellow, slant eyed baby satisfies. + +To the Esquimaux, the round faced, small eyed, black haired little one +is the admired type. + +A child should be taught to love and be proud of its race and to know +the good points of the race. + +Colored babies are born with rare physical gifts. First: They are born +with the most beautiful eyes in the world. Unlike foreign children who +come to this country, they seldom have sore eyes. I have visited about +six hundred colored schools and have yet to see a sore eyed colored +child. + +The obligation of a gift is the preservation and cultivation of this +gift. Little colored children should be taught to keep their eyes open +and bright with intelligence and clear with good health, because the +eyes are the windows of the soul. Their eyes should look straight into +the eyes of others with their souls shining through. Their eyes must be +kind eyes, listening eyes, observant eyes, thoughtful eyes, and +remembering eyes. + +Second: Colored people are credited with having the finest teeth in the +world. The obligation of this gift is cleanliness and preservation of +this attractive gift. A colored child should be taught to deny herself +to pay a dentist's bill. + +Third: Colored people have the finest voices in the world. The +obligation of this gift is its cultivation, proper care and control of +the voice, and to speak in good English. + +There are other natural gifts but of them--later on. The greatest gift +to the Negro is himself. So much in him is hidden, spiritually, +intellectually, psychically and physically, that he is a vast unexplored +mine. + +All colored babies like all little white babies, excepting in the shades +of color, are born about alike, with round or long heads, all with the +same soft spot on the crown, and like white babies, are mostly all mouth +because they are hungry little animals and use their mouths often. + +As the child observes, thinks, and "wills," the bumps and hollows +appear, the features develop and lines grow. Any ugly little baby may +develop into a beautiful child. Any beautiful child may grow ugly and +coarse. + +If babies were born with developed features they would be monstrosities. + +"Within each of them is an inward sculptor, Thought, who is a rapid, +true workman." + +Colored children should be taught that Thought will improve their good +points and will eradicate any objectionable points. They should be +taught their good points and their bad points, and should be encouraged +to improve their personal appearance, as far as objectionable racial +characteristics are concerned. + +As the girl grows she should be taught the value of personal appearance +as a factor in her life problem and ultimate success. + +A little colored girl who wants to be pretty should be taught what +"pretty" really is. The old proverb says, "Pretty is as pretty does," +thus recognizing the power of the inward Sculptor Thought, and its +controlling and cultivating forces. + +At an early age the child should be given subjects to think about. She +should be taught to see the beautiful in Nature and Art that the +reflection may be seen in her face and in her actions. Ask her if she +saw the sun rise this morning or the sun set last night, or if she +noticed the moon light, or the grandeur of the low black clouds, or the +fleeciness of the soft white clouds; tell her to listen to the language +of the birds and insects, and the sighing of the winds through the +trees. Tell her to listen to the teeming of the earth and ask where and +when the earth smells the sweetest. Teach her to walk and talk with +Mother Nature and to recognize her voice in everything, until Nature +will appear more, mean more, and teach more. Companionship with flowers +and the cultivation of plants is to be recommended, even in the most +congested flat life. + +The colored child should be taught Negro History that she may be proud +of her dark skin. It is a long interesting story way back to the days of +Ethiopian glory, for the Negro is the sub-strata of that race. Tell the +child how fair races from the North invaded Africa, and until today the +present colored race can trace its black blood back to African kings and +queens, and its white blood to the kings and queens of the Old World.[A] + +Let her know that the black man was the author of much of the world's +history, and that Moro, the capital of Ethiopia, was at one time the +great seat of learning. She should be taught early in life to read +Ancient History, that she may see what the black man has done for the +world, that she may have pride in her black blood as well as in her +white blood. Tell her the record of the Negro as a soldier, statesman, +and explorer. Read to her about the brave part that he played in the war +of 1812 and subsequent wars, even in the recent terrible war, he was +among the bravest. Help her to make a scrap book that she may pass her +knowledge on to others. While authorities in history say that a race +once great, can never attain greatness again, as truly as the pendulum +swings this mixed race will surely come into its own. The colored race +comes from several lines of white ancestry, and as fruit is grafted to a +finer degree of species, so the colored race will some day show its +latent powers. The child of today is to be the mother of the great child +that is to be, and each one must do her part to help prepare for the +future great colored child. + +Teach the colored girl about prejudice. Parents should read up the +World's history of persecution and note the accounts of race and +religious persecution in England, France, Germany, Russia, Turkey and +Spain. Even today there is English hatred of the East Indian, Russian +persecution of the Jew, and Turkish persecution of the Armenians. Then, +too, Europeans are only just beginning to regard the Oriental nations as +human beings. Prejudice is hard to explain and hard to conquer. It has +taken generations in other instances and the world has always kicked the +under dog. Tell the colored child how these other persecuted nations are +conquering prejudice; tell her that each colored child must be a race +missionary and prove her worth and powers, thus winning friends for the +race. + +She must be taught the application of the story of Esther to her race. +Tell her that each colored girl may be an Esther, especially in all +matters of cleanliness, manners, and self sacrifice, to advance and +change the prevalent opinion of the Negro. Each colored woman, not only +bears her own burden, but she bears the burden of posterity and the +burden of the race. Each one must fit herself for the triple burden. Not +even a talent should be used wholly for personal gain nor solely for +present uses. Her education must be a process of development of powers +not only to fit her for citizenship and life, but it must fit her for +her race's burdens. + +Some one has said: + +"To educate a boy is but the education of an individual--but when one +educates a girl, the education of a family results." + +Every little colored girl, like every little white girl, wants to be +beautiful. What is beauty? Beauty is a combination of personal +appearance and charm, and it can not be purchased. + +Each year the merchant takes stock and separates all the best articles, +the medium articles, and the poor articles. + +And so when one determines upon self improvement, she should take stock. +She sums up her good points and her bad points. The good points she will +accentuate and the bad points she will eradicate, unless Thought, the +inward Sculptor has been at work too long. It is for this reason that +little colored children should be taught early in life to think rightly. + +"As the sprig is bent, so will the tree be." + +Every thought, every emotion has an outward manifestation. Because +people think, feel, and act, they leave marks of these in bodily lines +and habits. Not only is the face a bulletin board, but as Schopenhauer +says, "One's life may be his autobiography." One's life may even be read +from his skeleton. + +Sometimes certain thoughts and habits repeated and repeated leave +spots. Spots always depreciate whether on wool, meat, wood, animals or +people. Has the Negro any "Spots"? Other people think so. If these +so-called "spots" will interfere with his future success in life then +let him eradicate them with the inward Sculptor--Thought. + +Is the dark skin a spot? Oh no, it is his history, his strength, as was +Samson's hair. Because of his color he has powers and forces which could +get him anything he desires in life if he would only begin while a +child, to learn restraint, how to govern and control himself until he +could accumulate sufficient will power to direct these forces for his +own advancement. + +Because of his color he has rare psychic powers which are not yet +understood by himself or by the world. + +What is the largest Spot? If one wishes to get a true estimate of +himself he finds out what others ridicule concerning him. + +What feature about the Negro is ridiculed the most? Why, the mouth. What +is the matter with it? A large mouth is supposed to be the sign of +generosity. No, but if it has thick lips and is a leaking mouth? If it +hangs open too much? Only two classes of persons are excused from having +open mouths, and these are children with adenoids and imbeciles. Every +one else is supposed to keep his mouth shut most of the time. + +The leaking mouth with the hanging under jaw causes a tendency to "leak" +along other lines. One's business and personal affairs "leak" in street +cars, public places, and on the streets to the detriment of the race. + +Permitting the lips to hang, thickens them. They grow too heavy to hold +up. Too much grinning and loud laughter will widen the mouth and loosen +it. We do not desire small mouths, but we do not look attractive with +"leaking mouths." Our mouths are improving. In the schools and college +pictures we find unmistakable evidence that Thought is working wonders +with the Negro mouth. + +What is the next most ridiculed "Spot"? The nose. What is the matter +with the noses? Large noses are said to be an indication of character +and ability. Napoleon always selected the generals with large noses +because he believed them to be more efficient. Oh, but the noses are +often flat and have no hump. + +Look at the hump of the Roman nose which indicates "fight." Look at the +hump of the Indian nose which also indicates warlike tendencies. Take +the Jewish nose. The hump means fight--a continual warfare for gold. + +But the Negro has been a peaceful person, consequently he developed no +nose hump. It is time that he developed a hump--a Negroid hump. He must +pinch up, think up, will up, a hump. The time has come to fight, not +only for rights, but for looks as well. He must build up a nose with +more character, which can not be ridiculed. Grinning widens the nose and +prevents its upward building, so grinning must cease. + +In examining the pictures of graduates from the different schools, we +find that Thought is changing the noses as well as the mouths. As the +mouth and nose are changed, so will the whole expression of the face be +changed. + +The Negro's hair may be considered a "Spot" by some, but care and +cultivation are changing this so-called "Spot" and more care and +attention will work more wonderful results.[B] + +His eyes and his teeth are good points and he has been given a +magnificent backbone as well as a beautiful voice, although he often +permits these gifts to degenerate. + +Because God has given each colored girl a beautiful voice, she should be +taught to speak in a soft mellow tone. She should speak eloquently and +elegantly. If she screeches or yells and abuses her vocal cords, she +will not only disgust people but she will lose her voice and have no +beauty of tone to bequeath. + +As the colored child has been made in the image of God, her poise should +be erect and fearless. Nature bestowed the gift of a straight backbone. + +The native African has always been straight like the pine sapling. In +civilization his descendant permits his back to bend. The chest caves +in, squeezing the heart, lungs and liver. One is more liable to +pneumonia and tuberculosis, and can not fight them successfully as these +organs have lost much of their vital force because of their cramped +conditions. + +Power is expressed in the way one carries her shoulders, and vitality is +measured by breathing capacity. + +One may sin against God and be forgiven, but Mother Nature never +forgives the sin against her. Unto the third and fourth generation the +punishment goes on for the abuse of the temple of the Soul. + +FOOTNOTES: + +[Footnote A: NOTE. The Bible and other books tell us that the Ethiopians +were a prominent people before the time of Christ. + +Recently in excavations pictures of Egyptian princes reigning 2900-2750 +B. C. prove from their hair that they had Negro blood. America will have +these proofs in the Boston Museum of Fine Arts.] + +[Footnote B: NOTE. "Kinky hair is neither a disgraceful nor a shameful +heredity. It is an honorable legacy from Africa. A kind Mother Nature +protected her children from the torrid sun which kept the oils and waxes +in a fluid state or else the hair would have dried up. The chemical +action of the atmosphere caused a shrinking into spirals which further +protected the uncovered heads from scorching." + +Constant care of the hair will cause an improved condition of the +texture which will in time be inherited.] + + + + +The Colored Girl Beautiful. + + +Every colored girl would like to be beautiful. The so-called beauty is +but skin deep. A burn, a scar, a disease, and beauty is fled, although +contour and other evidences might remain. + +One can not remove bad looks with soap and water. Youth should be and is +always attractive. It is after twenty-five that one begins to wish that +she had been more careful in her youth, that she had controlled her +powers, and that she had cultivated her good points and removed her +"Spots." + +A girl should study herself, learn her powers, and she will get the real +beauty if she will deliberately and persistently train for it. + +We look at the photos of beautiful, smiling, round-faced children and +then at the tired, many-lined unhappy faces into which they have +changed. Women delight in showing us photos to prove how beautiful they +were when they were sweet sixteen. As we look, it is hard to believe. +However, the camera, they say, always tells the truth, and we have later +evidence before us. + +The inward tools, Thoughts, have carved the ugly pictures on faces. +Ignorance is a terrible curse along all lines. Many have not learned the +secret of preserving their bodies, along with other studies, yet the +savage nations care for their bodies. + +Girls abuse their bodies; they eat too much or else the wrong kind of +food, causing indigestion or other stomach and liver troubles. There is +no room for the distended digestive organs and gorged stomachs and if +these walls are stretched too often they lose their elasticity and the +digestive juices go on a strike, causing eruptions on the face and a +bad complexion, besides other complications which destroy beauty. Then, +too, coarse or highly seasoned foods arouse other appetites through the +law of sympathy. + +Girls do not heed the signs of colds and complications peculiar to +women. Operations are often necessary because of exposure and neglect of +colds. The clothing is often too tight and pressure causes malignant +growth and great suffering in after years. + +A girl should keep her face as clean as a man's face after shaving, and +her body should be correspondingly clean, that the gases and odors may +escape, lest they take revenge upon her face. A girl should no more +offer a foul odor of body or mouth or nose, than she would offer poison. + +A girl must study her body and preserve it by attending to colds and +diseases in time. + +One who desires beauty should fight against a desire for intoxicants. +There is nothing that coarsens the skin of some women so quickly as the +habit of drinking beer. Chewing gum coarsens the muscles of the jaw and +gives a downward trend that few faces can afford to wear. + +The real beauty is carved from within and the inward Sculptor is always +at work. One may buy artificial teeth, hair and limbs, but no cosmetics +or massage will cover up the ravages of Thought. Every thought leaves +its imprint and every emotion leaves its manifestation. + +Beauty is not always a tangible something. Many people are called +beautiful when they do not even own attractive features. Charm and +personality throw a special light over the features, thus transforming +them. Any one may cultivate charm and personality if she has not been +born with them. + +To be beautiful, one must fill her mind with beautiful thoughts. Impure +thoughts, angry thoughts, unhappy thoughts, jealous thoughts, and +cowardly thoughts will arise, but they must be driven away. Health +suffers from these thoughts because they affect sleep and appetite. +Lines appear upon the face as an index of interior troubles. + +One must not only be careful of thinking detrimental things, but she +must be careful of what she says to others, and of what she writes in +letters, for writing a thought intensifies its influence. + +Impure novels often lead girls astray or give them impure thoughts which +are printed or published in their faces. + +A girl should not affect boldness. It "sets" the muscles in the face and +neck. One should affect modesty and purity even if one does not feel +them, that they may enhance her looks. + +Rough uncouth actions and gestures cause ugly lines in the face. + +Not only is the face the bulletin board of habitual thought, but the +body reflects thought through gestures and other movements. + +Repose of manner and a soft voice are two of the greatest charms that a +woman may possess. Restlessness is not only a sign of lost control, it +gives a false idea to passers-by. Quietude gives a sense of power. +Control is culture, and culture is a beauty point. + +Some one has said that in the matter of first impression, "appearance is +half and the voice is the other half." "Later you will be able to make +one forget an unattractive appearance, but we never grow accustomed to a +rasping voice." "Nothing in the world is so humiliating as to be a +graceful and beautiful woman with a bad voice." + +Talkativeness is another "Spot," and a sign of lost control. In public +places, especially, it is a sign of ill breeding and bad taste. Good +breeding should always keep a woman from loud talk. We must remove the +stigma of loudness and coarseness that now rests upon the race. The less +a person knows, the bigger noise she generally makes. The big touring +car never makes the noise that a motor cycle does, nor does a great +steamer make the fuss that a tug boat does. The deep stream is silent +while the little brook babbles. + +It is exceedingly vulgar to air one's opinions in street cars, railroad +cars, or in any public place. A person who really knows anything does +not parade his knowledge or his opinions. + +While emotional people are generally attractive, yet the habit of the +expression of the emotions could be turned to better account. + +Lost Motion and Lost Emotion are the two great "wastes" of the race. + +One not only enhances her beauty but one is really a Somebody or a +Nobody according to the control she has over her mind and body. She must +control her emotions as she does her appetite. Excessive emotion +debilitates the system. Anger is poison to a woman's system. It causes a +chemical action which upsets the stomach. The bite of an angry person is +sometimes poisonous, because of this chemical change. A fit of anger may +upset the whole digestive system, and may even cause death because blood +is taken from the digestive system and many bodily functions cease. Any +emotion causes the heart to beat faster. + +There is health as well as beauty in self control. Culture is self +control. The Colored Girl Beautiful should cultivate reposefulness. A +display of emotion or restlessness indicates lost control. + +There are only two classes of people who are excusable for disturbing +large quantities of air in their movements. These are babies and +lunatics, because neither have brain development nor mental control. + +The colored girl beautiful must learn to sit still. She must learn to be +methodical in order to have resting periods. She needs a few minutes +each day for relaxation and repose. If she has not learned to relax, she +should change her occupation at different periods of the day. She must +train herself not to get excited. She must not quarrel or argue. She +must train herself to be temper-immune, and not to permit others to +upset her equilibrium. + +A real lady never gets visibly angry. Anger drives away friends who +really help to make us beautiful by giving us pleasant sensations. + +One should be eternally feminine. One should not attempt athletics +unless she is sure that her physique will endure this. A strain may +wreck one's health and looks. Most women are built like watches--one +thing wrong upsets the whole mechanism. + +Observing the small courtesies in life makes one charming. Knowledge of +the various forms of society etiquette has made many women popular and +has placed them in an enviable social position. Real politeness comes +from a kind heart, from good impulses and it ranks as a strong beauty +point because it illumines the face. + +If one is obliged to work out for a living she must remember that habit +affects looks. If one is energetic and happy the face will reflect the +content. If one shirks her duty and hates her work, her face will +reflect discontent; her vital organs will weigh downward and affect her +health, and her looks will suffer. One must affect enthusiasm in her +work to stimulate the vital organs. + +So the real beauty is carved from within and the inward Sculptor is +always at work. A girl is her own beauty doctor and can work out her own +beauty destiny. She may have everything in life that she wills, if she +will only guide this inner workman. + +A girl who lives in the back woods may make herself so choice and +beautiful in the indescribable way, that her fame will spread miles +away. She should bide her time, stay to herself until she has fully +improved herself, mind and body, and she will reap her full reward. + + + + +Law of Attraction--Vibrations. + + +Every one of us has a magnet within which attracts others for good or +evil, and which is attracted by good or evil. The old philosophers have +given us many proverbs to bear out this truth. We have the saying, +"Birds of a feather flock together." + +The law of vibrations was studied centuries ago by the old wise men. + +One attracts the kind of vibrations that one sends out. The Bible also +has given us many commandments and injunctions to protect us from +ourselves. We are told that one must love if one would be loved; "to +cast thy bread upon the waters and it shall return to you," "as ye sow, +so shall ye reap." + +Whatever is projected returns sooner or later. One may not even send an +evil thought as in an anonymous letter, valentine, or register an +unexpressed wish without making herself liable to self punishment. + +One's personality and thoughts, either good or evil, always surround +her, "like a contagious cloud." A strong personality will influence a +weaker personality just as a magnet attracts. Many are influenced +because they vibrate similarly and many are influenced because they are +attractable or weak. + +Revivals, riots, political agitations and race prejudices are all +evidences of the power of strong projections of thought. Race prejudice +is the result of the vibrations of hate and anger sent out by strong +minds. The world is what one makes it by the projection of one's +thought. The magnetic, energetic, hearty person brings things about +because he projects a stronger vibration of thought, will power and +personality, whether in a hearty hand shake, sunny smile or display of +interest. + +By helping others we help ourselves. We must learn to give, give, give, +in order to receive. + +The sporting element and the under world recognize and fear the laws of +vibrations. They know nothing of the laws but they have instinctive +recognition of some force, which returns the act. They give because they +desire luck. One may always receive help from them because they are +afraid to refuse aid. + +Washington Irving has said, "Happiness is a reflection." "Everybody's +countenance is a mirror transmitting to others, its rays." If one makes +a habit of sending out happy, loving thoughts, the face reflects the +thought and gains in charm and beauty. + +We must teach our minds to act upon the minds of others. We must learn +the laws and obey them, that we may send out strong thoughts of peace +and love to counteract the overwhelming tide of thought against us. + + + + +Love. + + +There are many kinds of love. There is filial love, platonic love, the +love leading to marriage, and the greatest love of all, mother love. Too +many desecrate love by regarding it as a pastime, or selling all that +passes for it, for favors, attentions and support. + +What is love? Many definitions could be given but the best answer is, +"Love is the habit of giving the best in us." Some one has said that +"Love is the easiest thing to make and the hardest to keep." + +So much of the life force is wasted because people imagine they are in +love. + +Somehow, girls are given to "falling in love," first with one man, then +with another. With each man there is the feminine desire to reciprocate +in full measure for various courtesies. + +What is the result? + +The vital forces are willfully wasted. + +Beauty needs powerful stimulants. No one could expect a tree to blossom +into a beautiful mature form if the sap were withdrawn. Youth is the +green apple period. One can never tell how a little green apple may +develop. It may become full blown and rosy cheeked, or it may become +worm eaten and cankered. + +Girls permit boys and men to kiss and fondle them (as one woman has +said, "to paw and claw them") and in turn they exert themselves to live +up to what they imagine is expected of them, believing it to be a fair +exchange for gifts and attention. + +When hypnotists desire to take the will power from their subjects they +use their hands in strokings. + +Girls should not permit young men to caress them, to hold their hands, +or to stroke their bodies. It is very weakening. It causes a girl to +yield to temptation because it induces passiveness to the will of the +projector. + +There is no present which a boy or man could give to a girl which is +worth the tiniest atom of this precious invisible life current. In after +life she realizes her folly, but it is then too late to remedy it. + +Often a perfectly pure minded girl in her youth wastes her life forces +with one beau after another, innocently imagining it to be her duty +because of the attentions that she receives. When she marries the "man +among men to her," she finds that she can not hold his affections +because of this waste, and often she sees another woman get the love +that is her due, as a wife. At the time of life when maturity should +give a full blown rose of a woman, she has dribbled out because she has +been too ardent. She is worm eaten and cankered because she has +devastated nature, and it is all her own fault. + +It is a debatable question whether a girl who has kissed many men, and +has thus wasted her vital forces would be a fit candidate for +Motherhood, and, on the other hand whether a boy or man who steals the +life forces from our girls is fit to be a father. A man has no more +right to steal this precious beauty stimulant from a girl than he has to +steal her clothes. + +Every man knows that if the girl he escorts around will kiss him, that +she has kissed the one who preceded him and will kiss the one who +follows him. It is no wonder that many men marry girls who have not +seemed so promiscuous. Many a good girl has been passed or +misunderstood. + +Colored girls should never sell their bodies and they should set a +higher value upon their bodies in every way. Especially should they be +known as "Hands off" girls. + +No one would think of handling a rare flower and expect it to endure. +The virgin soul is always likened to a flower. + +If a young man after a few calls thinks that he is entitled to a +goodnight kiss he should be speedily set right. + +Any emotion or feeling diffusing the body has an effect upon health and +upon beauty. An organ may become exhausted from the rush of blood caused +by an impure thought. + +Kissing excites passions until they become uncontrollable. + +A girl must cultivate her will power along with charm and personal +magnetism in order to become a beautiful woman. She must resist the +temptation to scatter her vital forces, so that when she marries she may +hold all of her powers for the man she desires to hold. She should +patiently wait for her "prince" and aim to give him unkissed lips, and +virginity of mind as well as of body. It will be a tremendous +satisfaction in fulfilling the definition of Love and Motherhood, +besides giving the real beauty. + +When boys and men desire caresses and kisses, a girl should send a +message to her Solar Plexus--her reflex nerve--to help her to say, "No." +She should let no present tempt her to be fleeced of her beauty food. + +In order to resist temptation, girls should be taught deep breathing, +that the diaphragm and educated nerves may obey emergency orders. The +practice of deep breathing is invaluable in the matter of resistance, +and will back up the "I won't", "I won't", "I won't", "Hands off", +"Hands off". A girl must hold her fists tightly and resist. + +She must psychologize the mind with thoughts of resistance by practicing +simple breathing movements, so that when temptation is imminent the +holding of a deep breath will be her salvation. The action of her +diaphragm and Solar Plexus will prevent any wavering. + +To cultivate and hold vital strength, one must hoard every atom of vital +strength. One may not even afford to write love letters in too warm a +strain. One will not only be ashamed in after years when this particular +fever has worn itself out, but one will then be conscious of wasted +vital strength. + +Beauty is so dependent upon vital strength that every atom of vital +force is needed and none must be wasted. + + + + +Personal Appearance. + + +Trifles show up the real character more than anything else, in clothes, +or the care of the hair, teeth or finger nails. Personal appearance is +one of the strongest factors in the beauty combination. After health, +voice, and poise comes the value of dress as a beauty accessory. Dress +has much to do with a man's classification of feminine beauty although +he may not be dress informed. Many French women are considered beautiful +because of charming dress accessories, which are generally immaculate +and in harmony. A modest girl dresses modestly; a sensible person makes +her clothes fit her person, her height, head, back view, side view, +ankles and heels. A woman's dress soon tells the character of the +wearer and betrays immorality. Even colors talk. + +With many people, finery seems to mean good dressing, yet their clothes +jar, cry out, even "scream out their unfitness and unwholesomeness, and +betray their dishonesty, shame and sacrifice." Clothes show silliness, +conceit, and selfishness more than any other thing, and often they shame +a home, so a colored girl should study her individuality and her life +position and dress accordingly. She should wear only becoming colors, +and she might affect a certain color to her advantage. She should +"cling" to what is becoming rather than follow exaggerated fashions. The +exclusive dressers in high society study to get simple lines; with them +severity in line is elegance. Such clothes wear several seasons. No one +minds wearing a becoming style a long time. Few colored women can afford +to keep up the pace of styles. There are women who live to dress no +matter what the cost may be but they are not to be envied for this +slavish passion. + +A man wears a good suit several years and looks well. Colored women +could plan their costumes that they might at least last two seasons. +They should study to make the most of what they have on hand. + +One good black dress still remains an asset to a wardrobe and most +colored women look well in black especially if it is relieved by a +becoming color. + +In France only the "Boulevard" women and actresses wear the exaggerated +styles that we see in the French fashion journals. + +The Colored Girl Beautiful will take care of her clothes. She will learn +to press and sponge, also the use of cleaning fluids, and to forbear +from sitting carelessly on coats and other apparel. + +Work clothes should be becoming in color and style. While one is buying +or making she may as well select attractive models. When one is attired +in unbecoming clothes, unconsciously the face reflects the thought in +unbecoming lines. One's voice takes on a coarser, unbecoming tone, and +the poise takes on an unbecoming attitude. For the same reason our girls +should not wear men's old hats or paper bags on their heads. + +One should aim to select something becoming that the face and body may +always appear at their best. One must be on beauty parade ALL the time +to get beauty lines. + +Appropriate clothes should be worn at all times. Pink or blue satin or +silk dresses should not be worn on Sunday or at church, even if one can +afford them. It is bad taste and sets a bad example to poorer girls who +sometimes sell their honor, even their lives for these perishable, +inappropriate costumes. + +In every mind there is a picture gallery of our friends and the people +we meet. Sometimes the pictures that we carry are not the best ones. One +is often caught unawares in soiled, unbecoming garments. It is not +necessary in this day and time to give an ugly picture of ourselves. + +We should be particular to give the best possible, most pleasing picture +to others at all times. There should be no "being caught." One should be +prepared early in the morning, any time of day, and all through the +night. + +On the streets and as the street cars pass our homes, colored people +should give the best pictures possible of themselves, if they can not of +the houses in which they live. We are a poor people but we can be quiet, +clean, becomingly and fittingly dressed. We must stifle the desire to be +conspicuous unless it is to be conspicuous by quietness. + + + + +Deep Breathing. + + +The Greeks are quoted as saying, "A healthy soul can only live in a +healthy body." People are beginning to see that to a great extent, +intellectual vigor depends upon physical vigor. + +Man is an air breathing animal. + +Air is life. One may go without food and water for days but not many +minutes without air. + +Air is the most important factor in generating vital force and it is the +best tonic in the world. + +A large, deep, chest indicates Health, Strength and Vitality. The size +of the chest indicates the size of the lungs. A narrow chest indicates +cramped lungs, heart, digestive organs and a small diaphragm. + +The diaphragm is the dome shaped breathing muscle which serves as a +partition between the chest and abdominal organs. Its contraction causes +development of the lungs and heart and at the same time the internal +massage of the abdominal organs. + +The lungs have been called the scavengers of the body for they take off +poison which would kill us. + +As the blood stores oxygen especially at night, windows should be kept +open to prepare the body for the next day's duties. + +"Exercise is the elixir of youth." + +Many people do not exert themselves enough to open the millions of +little lung cells. Mother Nature demands a heavy price for this neglect +of her laws. + +The heart is now recognized as a muscle which needs muscular exercise as +other muscles need exercise. + +The heart is very wonderful. Although it weighs only about eleven +ounces it has each day a lifting strength of 120 tons to the height of a +foot. With seventy beats of a pulse a minute, six ounces of blood are +forced into arteries seventy times a minute or 187-1/2 gallons every +hour. This could fill a lake or pond in a life time. + +Deep breathing is the fundamental foundation of Physical Culture, of +Singing and of Oratory. This is why these studies are recommended to +lessen the susceptibility to disease especially tuberculosis and other +lung diseases. + +Deep breathing cures nervousness and many chronic complaints because it +improves the circulation of the blood and causes internal massage +especially of the abdominal organs. + +Deep breathers are seldom mentally weak because deep breathing develops +Will power. Its study causes pride in one's body and its physical gifts +because it teaches the values and beauties of different parts of the +body. + +The habit of deep breathing cultivates Personality and Personal +Magnetism and thus makes one attractive. A great deal of the success in +life comes from winning people through Personal Magnetism. + + + + +Originality. + + +A woman's mind should always be filled with a life plan, else she is in +danger. A busy woman is generally a safe woman. She must find her life +work and keep busy. Even a hobby is better than nothing if time hangs on +her hands. She should do something with all her might and not delay, for +Time is flying. + +A colored woman especially should have some purpose in life to further +race advancement. It should not only be a high purpose but it should be +something real. + +To be enthusiastic about something is beautifying because it stimulates +the circulation of the blood. Any kind of success comes from enthusiasm. + +No matter how poor a woman may be she may be original in her ideas. At +first, of course, she must use the ideas of others, until she can show +her cleverness through her adaptations, and employing her powers and +gifts will add until larger powers and gifts result. + +She must try to get a new line of work for race advancement and dedicate +herself to it. If she eliminates the Ego (Self) and will aim to work for +the good of others, she will succeed. + +Each one should find a realm, something in which she shall be supreme, +and be first. "It is better to be first in an Iberian village than +second in Rome." The race needs daring original people, to think and +speak. + +Emerson says, "Every man has a call to do something unique." + +The person who thinks up new lines of study, thought and ideas for the +race, enlarging its vision and enriching its mind is a race benefactor. +Ruskin's creed of work should be the universal creed. "The man or woman +who does work worth doing is the man or woman who lives and breathes his +work; with whom it is ever present in his or her soul; whose ambition is +to do it well and feel rewarded by the thought of having done it well. +That man, that woman, puts the whole country under an obligation." + +Colored women have a genius for leadership. There is great executive +force in them. Many a colored woman is an undeveloped genius waiting for +opportunity. One should try avenue after avenue until the right one +opens, for her life work. + +In spite of criticism she must fight on, alone if necessary, "With God, +one is a majority," said Frederick Douglass. + +If one can not be a genius or be original, she may do anything near at +hand. She should find something to do so that she will have something +to talk about besides herself and her friends. + +One might take up the study of music, voice culture, elocution, art, +embroidery or housekeeping (domestic science) and pass it along to +others. + +The surest way to make people "take notice of one" is to work for +others. One may also live in peoples' hearts as well as their minds, if +she will ally herself with a good humanitarian cause. + +If one is not what is termed religious, or is lacking in religious +feeling, she should at least conceal this serious void by showing +respect for religion in no unmistakable terms for the sake of example. +One should always hold up Christian ideals even though she may not be a +spiritual woman or be called an earthly saint. She can hold up for a +more rigid moral code and the highest thought in ethics. + +It pays to be respected, but after one has trusted and has been +disappointed, deceived, and betrayed, she will find that it pays best to +keep close to the "Cross" where that "One always listens and +understands." One should not get too far away from "It" because one is +certain to return sooner or later. + +The best representative people go to church if only for example's sake. +Even if one were not extremely religious she could be an authority on +religions, reading up the history of other churches as well as one's own +church discipline. One might originate prayers or "graces" for the table +and sell printed copies for a local charity. + +Any woman should be proud to espouse the cause of children and their +broader education, as well as their health and happiness. One might try +to bring a musical artist or lecturer to them every two or three years. + +Every day of one's life there is an opportunity to make some one happy. +One might amuse herself by keeping a diary of her efforts along this +line. + +Speech is a cultivated talent. One might study to be good company, not +to be funny or witty, but she might study the art of expressing herself; +not to air her knowledge, that would be vulgar, but to store her memory +with a fund of information concerning the great paintings and works of +art, and lives of great composers. + +One might even be an authority on economy and demonstrate how to make +over dresses, hats, etc. + +One could economize on her wardrobe and travel on the savings giving +little "Travelogues" to those less fortunate. There is an indescribable +joy and satisfaction in serving others, even though the recipients are +not grateful. It gives one a sense of power and wealth. + +One might even cultivate her sensibilities and increase her knowledge +of the beautiful in Nature and Art, to carry young folks upon little +Nature and Art expeditions to the country or to museums. Permission +might be granted to enter many closed doors. The word children is often +an open sesame. + +If one is tied down to life work inside her home, she may manufacture +smiles and cultivate a beautiful speaking voice. It is a pleasant +occupation to bring smiles to the faces of others. It is rather +fascinating to try to change the expression of other people's faces by +exaggerating the happy timbre in one's voice. Even if one may not do big +things she may charge the atmosphere with smiles. + +When I was a girl, an old friend used to say to me, "Never let people +down you, always come up smiling." One may come up from troubles and +bitterness with a forced smile until the smiling muscles act for +themselves, automatically. + +One may also cultivate good manners until she wins a wide reputation for +real ladyship, and thus be an example. Only the uncertain are impolite; +fear is their ruler. Those who own strength and power are always those +who are gentle because they are sure of their life position. Real +politeness is only an outward expression of the generous impulses of the +heart; it is inborn. Politeness may be cultivated until it passes for +the real thing. + +Originality does not include exclusiveness. Exclusiveness is deadly to +originality. The exclusive woman is seldom of service to the race, and +she is not always a congenial or an agreeable person. She may live so +much to herself that she is uninteresting as well as selfish. She +touches nothing vital excepting books and has nothing else to talk +about. + +One should train herself to make a perfect social circle as far as she +is able. + +The display of wealth is never original--only vulgar--and only an inborn +vulgar woman would place her so-called friends at a disadvantage by +entertaining them beyond their power of return. + +It is pathetic to watch the social efforts--"climbing"--of people with +only money "Sans" brains and originality. + + + + +Youth and Maturity. + + +The two attractive periods in a woman's life are girlhood and maturity. +If girlhood is not sufficiently attractive a girl may go into beauty +training for maturity. + +Many women who persevere in right thinking and right actions have three +stages of attractiveness, youth, maturity, and old age. + +A face that reflects nothing is seldom beautiful. + +To be beautiful one must think more, love more, in the right way, and +give more in the right way. + +A girl should not try to get old and look old, for age comes to her soon +enough. Girlhood comes but once in a lifetime. One must keep young by +being young and "thinking young." One must never let tiredness leave its +mark either in the face or poise. Tiredness has never attracted and when +people say that one looks tired, it is time to smile and deny it, for +the "Spot" is beginning to take form. The body should never be permitted +to settle. In Cuba, the women have enormous hips because they sit so +much and are inactive. + +Each muscular movement should reflect health and youth until one feels +hardy and young. One should breathe all the fresh air that she can +consume. Breathing is a vital force which sends blood to fill out +wrinkles and eradicate blemishes and spots. + +The fair, fat, and forty age is no longer dreaded. Like Lillian Russell, +women are learning to keep the face youthful by keeping the illusion of +youth and the belief that she is youthful. If we feel young we look +young. + + + + +Self Control. + + +"Will Power is the rudder of the ship of life." + +A woman's life is about what she makes it. She is her own Fate. The law +that governs one, governs all humanity, because the laws of thought are +the laws of the universe. The mind and body are co-workers. "As a man +thinks, so is he." Great men are those who see to it that the mental +force is stronger than the material, and who "Will" that thought shall +rule their world. + +Every thought stimulates certain brain cells, and exercises some nerve, +tissue or muscle. Man's superiority to animal is due to this mental +action. + +Actions speak louder than words. They are published thoughts. Every +movement of every portion of the body has significance. Picking up a +glass, a cup, or tools and other habits reflect the mind and its +superiority to the physical. There is no surer way to judge people. + +Every face tells a tale and we read character from the physical +form--the head, the backbone, the eye, the mouth, the chin, or hand. The +uplifted eye, the corners of the mouth, the manner in which one eats or +stands, in fact every movement has a special meaning, which may be +easily read. + +The body is like a camera, it tells the truth; it is the outward sign of +inward grace, or vice versa. + +Some one has said "Women's characters are writ large on their faces and +God writes a perfectly plain hand." Because women are more emotional +than men and because they often indulge themselves in emotions, the +signs are frequently very evident. If we study these signs when we meet +others we may "size them up," and almost know what is passing through +their minds. Because of sexual magnetism men read women more easily than +they read men. + +Mental habits soon become reflective or automatic. In order to read +others we must study ourselves, discover our habits and tendencies and +trace them to their source for correction. + +The time has arrived for new thoughts, new studies, and new habits. +Colored women must be led along the new lines of thinking. Although many +have seemed stupid about some of the abstract studies, they have native +powers that have too long lain dormant. + +Many are permitting their forces to go to waste instead of controlling +them. They must discipline themselves to gain self control over such +habits as over-eating, coarseness, inertia, anger, and other beauty +destroyers. + +Any excessive emotion debilitates the nervous system and thus affects +good looks. + +Proper poise prolongs life because pressure on certain organs is evenly +distributed and no strain is placed on any particular muscles to cause +abscesses or tumors, etc. Improved circulation of the blood results, and +good circulation spells health. One can think better when poise is +correct for the same reason. + +The conversation of people gives a pretty correct estimate of character. +Complaints from people who are sorry for themselves is one of the +tell-tale evidences of a weak character. + +There is a present day need of knowledge concerning a certain contagion +of emotions. Strong feeling sometimes vibrates that which is hostile and +selfish. One fretful, scolding woman can upset a neighborhood, to say +nothing of a household. + +One's thoughts should be of love and peace, instead of worry and fear, +lest she may harm others. A woman should be unafraid to conquer life's +problems. She should have faith in herself or she will be a dreamer +instead of a doer. She must be positive instead of negative, but be +positive in the right way which includes the thought and help for +others. + +Voices reflect the mind and soul, so the colored woman should control +the speaking voice. + +Ella Wheeler Wilcox has said, + + "Some voices affect us like music, + Some voices arouse to action and ambition. + Some voices fill you with despondency. + Some voices irritate like a buzz-saw. + Some voices snap like turtles, and some hiss like serpents." + +Control of the speaking voice is one of the most admired evidences of +self control. + +The power of the mind over the body is said to be greater than any germ. +Compelling the mind to perform some one useful disagreeable act each day +is a splendid habit trainer. The influences that we exert over others +will depend to a great extent upon the control over our own habits as +well as the resistance to influence that others might exert over us. + +One must conquer habits of laziness, untidiness, extravagance, voice, +gestures, clothing, to gain power to concentrate Thought. + + + + +Her Relationship With Men. + + +Many girls think that they understand men, but they flatter themselves. +Men do not always understand themselves, and often do things because +they have been led to "the doing," by misunderstanding the girl. + +A man likes to measure up to the opinion of sympathy, strength, +protection, or wickedness, that he imagines a girl has of him. He often +says and does things to please the girl more than to please himself. + +Girls often throw out allurements and temptations especially in the way +of immodest dress and seemingly innocent actions which have been the +downfall of men as well as of themselves. While men have known that the +temptations were deliberately planned, they have not had sufficient will +power to resist. It is an unpardonable crime for a young girl to take +such an advantage for frequently she ruins the career of a man. Such a +girl has two souls to answer for when her own downfall is a sufficient +burden to carry. + +Some girls complain of insults from men. There are so many good reasons +which could be given for this, but girls would indignantly deny that one +reason is that they bring this upon themselves. + +They discuss slippery subjects and personal experiences, and "heart +longings" which call forth the ever present manly (masculine) sympathy. +This often leads to actions afterwards regretted. + +Men are good readers of the public bulletin--a girl's face. They see the +mark of intoxicants, impure thoughts and other weaknesses as if they +were spelled out on the features, and as they are keenly sensitive to +projected vibrations, they act accordingly. + +Sometimes dusk, or night's darkness is to blame for much mischief. Moral +resistance seems to be at low ebb at this time, and an evidence of +timidity or other feminine weakness may be misunderstood--read +incorrectly as a feminine subterfuge seeking physical contact. + +If one will always expect good from men--the men will generally rise to +it. Try to believe that every man is chivalrous, but do not put his +chivalry to too severe a test. + +Curiosity and a too venturesome spirit may lead to mischief and trouble +too great to be remedied. One must not think or project impure thoughts, +nor must she expect insults and familiarities. Men generally respond to +the (influencing) thought. They feel the thoughts and obey them. + +Girls must remember that most men talk. Some will tell on girls if it is +the last act of their lives, although they may not mean to tell. A newly +married man will tell his wife, or another will tell his affinity. +Another may drink too much and grow confidential. Some even talk in +their sleep. One may not think that she will escape; her indiscretions +will follow her to her lifelong regret. + +She should not try to be a woman too early in life, and should not marry +too early. She should study her physique and her constitution. She +should not permit desire and curiosity to control her good sense. Long +illness, suffering, operations, and even early death may result from +premature responsibility. If necessary, she should consult a physician +and look the future squarely in the face. + +Girls do not now mature as early as their mothers and grandmothers did, +and they have not the same power of endurance and resistance, because +times, conditions, and the mode of living have changed. + +Long engagements should not be encouraged. If a man wants a girl he will +wait patiently without any coddling or coaxing. Long engagements are +enervating. Engaged couples feel that they are licensed by public +opinion and they tax their powers in a way that married people would not +dare to do. Too much liberty in long engagements is so often a serious +menace to health and happiness in after marriage relationship. It takes +away the charm and bloom of married life because the man learns to know +his fiancee too well. + + + + +The Religion of the Colored Girl Beautiful. + + +God is the perfection in all that is good. God is the best in us. God is +the perfection of all that is beautiful, orderly and harmonious--the 100 +per cent of everything in the world. + +The religion of the colored girl beautiful should teach her that +everything is spiritual--sacred--because everything comes from God. + +It is not sufficient to say, "I am a Christian (I am spiritual--of the +Spirit)" unless one expresses this in countless ways each day. Not only +in kind, helpful actions and gentle speech, but in the work-a-day life. + +The colored girl beautiful expresses her Christianity--her +spirituality--the best, or 100 per cent in her, when she puts Christ +into every act of her every day life. No act should be too insignificant +for this expression. + +The parables of Jesus teach us that He put His Spirit into the lowest +act, as for instance in the parable of the tent-maker. + +If the colored girl beautiful is truly of His Spirit she will +spiritualize, light up her every day environment with the "Light" that +is in her as a beacon to others as well as to show her appreciation of a +priceless possession. + +Each day she has innumerable opportunities to express the Christ in +her--her spirituality--in the neatness of her apparel, and in the +tidiness of her home and yard. She may take her religion--her +Christ--into the kitchen and express Him and the 100 per cent +spirituality in her cooking, sweeping, and in her dish washing. + +Doing things well expresses the proportion of the Christ--the +perfection--the 100 per cent in us. The more Christ one claims, the +better should one express Christ in his daily labor as every-day +evidence. + +A low daily percentage is a poor record for one who claims spirituality +on Sunday. + +No untidy church, home, or school expresses Christ--for Christ +represents perfection in cleanliness and order. "Cleanliness is next to +Godliness" we are told. Cleanliness shows the spiritual, the God, but +dirt in any form is an expression of the opposite. Dirt under a bed and +a prayer beside it are not compatible, to say the least, unless the +"pray-er" is unable to sweep. + +The Christ principles properly interpreted and applied would +spiritualize a broom and duster and all the utensils of a home or the +tools of a trade. + +Order is an expression of the God-part which makes us more orderly in +the habits of life if we make pretensions as Christians. + +God is not only all that is perfect in cleanliness, order and harmony, +but He is also all that is perfect in color and sound. God is in the +body and all its parts, the hair, teeth--all. + +As harmony and color are expressions of Spirituality so good taste in +dressing expresses the God in us. By observing and studying Nature one +learns God's taste in color and what is harmonious. + +We should dress to suit the color of the face and the physical +attributes that have been given to us. God has appropriately garbed each +object in Nature. Colored people should study themselves and dress +accordingly. The bright, gay colors are not suitable to all. Many +violate the laws of harmony of color, and unconsciously expose the +ugliest in their appearance by wearing gaudy, unbecoming, inappropriate +clothes. + +As the harmony of sound comes from God, so an eloquent voice expresses +God. Christians should make their voices more elegant and eloquent. A +loud, coarse voice expresses the opposite of God. Coarseness in thought +and speech is unlike Christ and serves to reveal opposite attributes to +those He represents. Grunting is not spiritual. No one could imagine a +grunt from Christ. + +A graceful motion or gesture also reflects the God in us. One would +never imagine any rough, uncouth gesture from Christ, who is the +"pattern of patterns." Grimaces are not spiritual besides they leave +lines in the face. + +A respect for the rights of others expresses the God in us, as do +obedience and kindness. We are told in positive language by God to +respect our elders and superiors. + +Race pride expresses the God in us. The Israelites were the chosen +people because of blood ties. They were proud of their blood. Blood is +thicker than water. The real Christian should be proud of his people; he +should believe in them and uplift them as our Great Example did the +lowly. + +The reverence which expresses God will cause one to respect His house or +any portion of it. A Christian would not handle a Bible carelessly and +would dust it as a privilege, because it is the message from God. A +Christian would not tear or disfigure any sacred book or selection of +music, while to sit upon the sacred rail of the altar or pulpit would be +an unpardonable act of sacrilege. + +The proper care of any article belonging to the Sacred Service is an +expression of Spirituality because it recognizes the article as a medium +of spirituality, something which should be reverenced. + +The singing of religious songs in any but a spiritual frame of mind +would be sacrilege just as the taking of the Lord's name in ordinary +conversation or in exclamation is sacrilege. + +The same religion or Spirituality which makes one shout, pray and sing +should prompt a girl not to wear a pale pink or blue satin dress or +other inappropriate fancy decollete dress to worship in God's House. She +cannot worship God and mammon at the same time and she should not be the +means of distracting anyone from spiritual thoughts through envy or +disgust. + +The Christ in a person will prevent her from speech and action which +would hurt the chances or success of another person. God has warned us +that the violation of this rule will surely return evil to the violator. +His law has many references to this particular self punishment. + +It can not be denied that Divinity has specially endowed the Negro +spiritually, but he does not consistently express it in all the forms +that he might express it, especially in the great Race cause. He is full +of heart, and will give his money, his food, his life, for God--but he +does not yet realize that the same love for God that he puts into his +gifts should be expressed and applied in his daily walks in life as +Christ has expressly commanded. + +We are taught that there are four kinds of Emotional Expression: The +Egotistic which is self and in the interest of self as in joy, rapture +and grief; the Aesthetic which has its expression in Nature and Art; the +Ethical which has its expression in the moral law; the Religious which +expression is in the faith of the Supreme Being. + +As yet the Negro has only fully expressed himself in but two: The +Egotistic, or the self interest, and the Religious, or the faith in the +Supreme Being. + +The Negro undoubtedly brought about his own freedom through his own +spirituality, and faith, and the concentrated, united thought of a whole +people upon one subject--freedom. His remarkable progress since +emancipation has been due to the same faith. + +The Negro should be, and could easily be the spiritual teacher--or +example--of the world. He must not only prove his spirituality but he +must diffuse it, that others may realize its power even if they may not +receive its benefit. + +Christ, the Supreme Example of spirituality was quiet. Other races hold +that ideal, of spirituality. When they see and hear a Negro shout, weep +and pray and then find that same person uncouth and dirty, they cannot +reconcile the two conditions, and so doubt the spiritual element which +they call Emotionalism. (They do not remember that the Spirit may be +strong and the flesh weak.) + +These critics cannot believe that an untidy, ignorant man with dirty +teeth stained with tobacco juice can give spiritual advice, and one must +admit that it does look incompatible. + +The race needs more quality in Emotion and less quantity. + +Once convince the rankest Negro hater that the Negro undoubtedly has +spirituality, which is surely advancing him and the race, and a certain +respect will follow. + +Each Negro must consider himself a spiritual missionary whose +appearance, speech, actions and surroundings will reflect the storehouse +of the great Light within. + +The colored ministers who preach Emotionalism, or what they term the +expression of spirituality should see to it that their flocks +spiritualize their daily lives causing cleaner churches, schools, homes, +yards, wearing apparel and Christian thoroughness in each daily act, +thus showing 100 per cent spirituality. + +The colored ministers who preach Non-Emotionalism should prove that the +power of spiritual expression is being directed along channels which are +helping their flocks and the race in each daily act, not only in race +progress but in convincing doubting Thomases who are blind to the good +traits in the race. + +The so-called Spiritual Power which would cause a woman to run down an +aisle and mash the hats of others, or to throw hand bags and give +similar evidences of strength and emotion could be turned into safer and +more helpful channels--as far as her race is concerned. A woman +possessed of this power and energy could be a great leader in great +deeds if she were taught how to do this. A shouter who can not help the +race in the battle against prejudice in her special locality, by +expressing her spirituality in each daily word and act as well as +apparel, and surroundings, seems a poor example of spiritual expression. + +The religion that does not help toward the advancement of this +persecuted race, and does not win the admiration and respect of other +races, is not the religion for the colored girl beautiful, of today. + +As a rule colored people expect entirely too much help from God. We must +help ourselves more. Each Negro carries a three-fold burden; first, his +own personal burden; second, the burden of his posterity; and third, the +burden of the race. These follow each other and are dependent upon each +other. + +God has given him physical strength, a strong backbone and strong +shoulders to carry the heavy yoke of the three-fold burden, as well as a +wealth of spirituality to cheer him and keep his heart light, along the +way of life. + +The religion of the Negro should prompt less study of the desires of the +personal Ego, and should teach other nations to respect his race, or, +his religion is not spiritualizing as it could and should spiritualize. + +The religion of the colored girl must be spiritual in every sense, that +it may influence her every thought and act, and make her a true medium +for race progress. + + + + +The School of the Colored Girl Beautiful. + + +"Education is the process of developing all man's powers, physical, +intellectual, moral, aesthetic and religious for the proper discharge of +the duties of citizenship." + +The school that the colored girl beautiful should attend will have +trees, grass, flowers, shrubs and a garden (even though a small one) +that the girl may keep in close touch with the first teacher--Mother +Nature. + +The care of the school campus as well as the windows, fences, and +surroundings, will reflect the careful spirit of the school. + +The colored girl beautiful will select the school which fights flies, +dirt, filth around back doors; the school which aims for sanitation +before putting in electric lights; in fact, a school which has health +and sanitation for its hobby. + +She will attend a school that buys books and takes care of them and +which compels the students to read that they may grow into the reading +habit, to pass it along to posterity. + +The progress of the race will depend not upon the "book learning" taught +in schools, but upon the right habits formed and the amount of self +culture that the school inspires. + +The colored girl beautiful will be taught to keep her eyes open and her +mouth shut that she may never betray how little she has really learned +in her preparation for the real school--the school of Life. + +The colored girl beautiful will be taught her duty and relationship to +the race, that she may be a living example of what right education and +right training will do. She will study human needs and about the +history and progress of her people that she may take her place in the +affairs of her race if called upon, and then bequeath her knowledge and +good qualities to succeeding generations. She will be taught lessons of +self-control and modesty; to respect her womanhood and to conduct +herself that she may command respect from all men and boys including +those of her family. + +She will be taught enough of the world to step into its arena knowing +the evils to shun. She will be taught to hold out a helping hand to +weaker ones who may succumb to evil. + +She will aim to live in pleasant relationship in the school that she may +acquire the habit of living in peace in social circles and neighborhoods +in the scheme of after life. + +She will be taught that politeness is a necessary virtue; that every +form of impoliteness is an evidence of mental as well as moral weakness +and that an ill bred colored girl is a curse to the race. She will be +taught the value of silence and that of speech, and will aim to train +herself along both lines for silence is often more effective than +speech. + +She will learn that the aim of education is the aim of religion, that +is, to lift one above the animal. She will endeavor to lift herself to +the highest plane of true womanhood that she may pull others higher. + +Colored schools are supposed to correct the tendencies of children who +have lived under careless, untidy conditions, and to give them ideals of +cleanliness and order. + +She will do her part of the school work cheerfully and thoroughly, that +she may know how work should be done, and how to train others--her +children, perhaps, if so favored. + +The colored girl beautiful will be taught the value and use of money, +and the relative value of character, education, and other things, which +money cannot buy. She will be taught the care and cleanliness of the +body, simplicity of wearing apparel and appropriate becoming +inconspicuous costumes for church, school, street and home. + +She will be taught that fine clothes can not cover up bad manners, nor +take the place of good character; that it is foolish to buy what one can +not afford; that the expenditure for clothes especially should be gauged +by one's salary and should be appropriate for her particular plane of +life. + +The laws of proportion in the scheme of life must be the hobby of the +school for the colored girl beautiful. + +She will be taught that it is unforgivable not to walk erect, to talk in +good English and in a soft tone of voice. + +As many girls fall into book ignorance after graduation she will be +taught that the aim of education is to give good habits of reading along +with book-knowledge--or else the school has failed to educate a colored +girl beautiful. + +The colored girl beautiful will not aim for book education alone. She +will select a school which will fit her to grace her home from parlor to +kitchen, a school which has thoroughness for its motto. + +She will be taught how to make her dresses and hats, to prepare for the +time when perhaps her allowance for clothes must be divided among +several. Dressmaking is a science as well as an art and enough can be +learned, by those not apt, to save many dollars--especially in the home +that fate favors with children. + +She will be taught a trade, or some means of earning a livelihood, that +she may be prepared, if circumstances should force her into the +business arena. + +The school of the colored girl beautiful will so educate her that +motherhood will be her highest ideal in life, the glory of colored +womanhood. + + + + +The Home of the Colored Girl Beautiful. + + +The Home of the Colored Girl Beautiful will reflect her. She will help +her parents to buy a home that it may give her family more standing in +the civic community. Taste and simplicity will rule, for the home will +harmonize with the girl. If her parents are not particular about the +trifles in the way of curtains, fences, and yards, then it must be her +special task to make the home represent the beautiful in her, the God, +for all that is beautiful and good comes from God. + +Windows generally express the character of the occupants of a house. The +day has passed when soiled or ragged lace curtains are tolerated. The +cheaper simpler scrims and cheese cloths which are easily laundered are +now used by the best people. + +The Colored Girl Beautiful, will study the possibilities of her home and +will attempt to secure the restful effects for the eye. Too much +furniture is bad taste. The less one has, the cleaner houses may be +kept. + +The ornate heavy furniture and the upholstered parlor sets are passing +away because they are no longer considered good taste, besides they are +too heavy for cleanliness and are harmful to the health of women who do +their own work. + +Furniture of less expensive model, with simple lines and of less weight +are being selected. These may be paid for cash instead of "on time," as +has been the custom of many people in smaller towns and in the country +districts. + +The furniture sold by the payment houses always shows its source in its +heaviness and shininess. + +The wall paper should be selected as one would select a color for +clothes, to harmonize with the color of the skin in all lights, and, for +service Color schemes in decoration are being followed and we have no +more stuffy parlors, often closed for days. Instead we have living +rooms, with cleanable furniture, strong but light, entirely suitable for +winter, and cool in summer. No one has a parlor now-a-days. The best +room is generally a living room for the whole family. No more do we see +enlarged pictures which good taste demands should be placed in bed rooms +and private sitting rooms. The ten cent stores have done a great deal of +good in educating the poor white and black alike. These stores have +every where sold small brown art prints of many of the great paintings, +to take the place of the gaudy dust ladened chromos and family pictures. + +Pictures are hung low that they may be thoroughly dusted, as well as to +give a near view of the subject. + +Expensive carpets are also things of the past. Painted and stained +floors with light weight rugs are more generally used. These may be +cleaned and handled without giving the backache to women. Many colored +girls boast of having painted their own floors and woodwork. Much of +this has been learned in the boarding school. + +A tawdry home expresses its mistress as do her clothes. + +Next to the kitchen a fully equipped bath room is now the most important +room in the house. Health and sanitation are the topics of the hour and +a colored girl should know how to put a washer on a faucet as well as +her father or brother. + +A house without books is indeed an unfurnished home. Good books are the +fad now. They are everywhere in evidence in the up-to-date colored home. +They are exhibited almost as hand painted china was. In every inventory +or collection one finds a Bible, a dictionary, and an atlas. + +The times are changing and the colored people are changing with the +times. Cleanliness and health are the watchwords, and "Order" is +Heaven's first law. + + + + +The Colored Working Girl Beautiful. + + +No one should ever scorn a colored working woman. She has been the bone +and sinew of the race. She has built the churches, helped the schools +and has made the race what it is. The pioneer colored woman in most +instances has helped to make the wealth that many colored families +enjoy, today. + +In my travels, on entering Southern towns early in the morning, colored +women are the only women seen on the streets, and sometimes the only +persons. They hurry along often with insufficient clothing in cold and +rain. + +One thinks of the little ones at home who dress themselves and perhaps, +younger children, all without a mother's care, until night when the +tired woman's return to her home to cook, to wash and to iron for her +family after a hard day's work, in service. + +In the antebellum days some of the Negro working women may have been +lazy but their descendants of today are not lazy--only fifty years +after. Statistics prove how many homes have been bought through their +labor, how many children are sent to school. Working women pay the +family doctor bills, and support the churches and charities. + +"Every person should work or else she will need a doctor." Habits affect +looks. If one is energetic and happy in doing her work, her face will +reflect the contentment. If one hates work, the face will reflect +discontent, the vital organs will grow flabby and affect the health, and +looks will suffer. Enthusiasm in work stimulates the vital organs, +causes circulation of the blood and makes the eye bright and the skin to +take on a more healthy hue. + +If a girl is obliged to work in a kitchen she should respect her work +and dignify her position. She may be a "Somebody" washing dishes or +scrubbing a floor, if she does not depreciate her work and if she will +give it status instead of half doing it and complaining about it. + +Only a somebody "can" work well. We cannot get blood out of a turnip, +and neither can a nobody "do" things. A slip-shod, half-hearted working +woman is a curse to the race, because she gives it a bad reputation. She +should put the "somebody" stamp on every portion of daily work and do +the work as if she expected to get a diploma for it each night. She +should not work mechanically or it will be drudgery. She should put +pride and enthusiasm in her work, and let it reflect her inner self. + +It is the duty of every working girl to make her employer adore her for +her personal value and her word. "Do so much better work than you are +paid to do that not only your employers, but their friends will take +note and soon you will be paid for more than you do." + +Be ready for the opportunity or crisis which is bound to come in a +change for the better. Stick to a position like a leach. Make it a +bigger and better one than you found it and it will prepare you for +greater openings. Somebody is always watching good workers. + +In her relationship with men the colored working girl beautiful will put +a higher appraisement on herself than may be necessary in the case of +the more fate-favored colored girl who stays under her parents' roof. +Because she works is no reason why she should be cheap, easily attained, +or easily pleased as far as men are concerned. + +She will demand much instead of little from men, that they will offer +more for the privilege of her society. Unless she is engaged she will be +wise to permit no caresses and will try to conquer the tendency towards +accepting "petting." + +She will bide her time for the recognition of her worth. Many a servant +girl has seen her posterity lead a town, socially. + +To know how to wait is a great secret; to patiently bide the time when +one may step into the niche that right living and preparation has made +possible. She will try to be contented and will strive for power to +conquer her work, and herself to be ready for the day when opportunity +will open her door to a larger and more responsible life. The beautiful +part about this is that she will be ready to fit into this new condition +of life. + +She should observe, listen and imitate the good when at work. Contact is +often worth more than money. Many valuable lessons have been learned +while "in service." While alone working one has opportunity to "think" +and Thought rules the world. + +A colored working girl is a racial trust. Her race burden is a heavy +one. Her speech, actions and diligence constitute the measure by which +the whole race is judged. + +One need not permit previous family conditions or disadvantages of birth +to hamper her progress in life. No matter what one's people have been or +are, one is not to blame providing she rises above all of it. + +She must "get up" and pull her family up after her, if she can. If this +can not be done she can pull herself up--up--up and be the "somebody" in +the family. She may grow in character, influence and reputation, until +people will forget her ancestry and any objectionable relations as well +as all former environment. + +The Colored Working Girl Beautiful should not fear or worry about what +people may think. She should save her money. A bank account is always +the most respected thing in the struggle of life. + +Even if some single black deed threatens to blot out the whole of a good +life (in one's own case or in the estimate of the world) she should be +brave enough to live it down. One should put her personality into +everything she does and "do" things worth while. The world moves on so +fast that even the bad is forgotten soon. One may live anything down +nowadays if one tries. + +If she may not go with good people socially, she should stay alone. In +time she will make herself and others believe that this is her +preference. + +She should not push or try to climb; she should bide her time. In the +meantime she might improve herself; she might study the piano, elocution +or singing, and prepare for the day when opportunity will open the +long-closed social door. + + + + +The Colored Woman Beautiful. + + +In spite of everything to be said on the subject the womanly woman is +always the strongest magnet whether she is called beautiful or not. + +If the colored girl has not been taught by her mother or guardian to +train herself for a beautiful maturity even after she has passed +girlhood, it is not too late to train herself. + +Good begets good, so she will exert herself to make a wide circle of +friends altho she will be careful not to grow too intimate with any. She +may be a real friend without undue intimacy. + +It is conceded that most women "must talk" to someone but too much +intimacy means too much freedom and this often destroys friendship. + +One cannot argue, quarrel, or criticize and still expect real +friendship. One definition of a friend is, "One you know all about and +still like." One should not try to "make her friends over" and one never +says disagreeable things to her friends nor does she make unfavorable +comments about their personal attire or weaknesses. She lets her friends +learn all unpleasant things from others. "The links of the chain of +friendship are held by a very delicate thread." The tiniest word, doubt +or action may sever the links. + +The colored woman beautiful will try to love that she may be loved. She +believes that "man is his brother's keeper" and she has ideals and +visions for the race. She has a moral obligation; she reaches out a +helping hand to others. She can mix without being mixed. We can not help +others unless we mix. There must be close contact--touch to lift up +others. + +The colored woman beautiful believes that everyone who gets up must pull +up, or else she will be kept down by the weight of the racial burden. +Each one's welfare is closely bound with that of the masses. The race +as a whole must progress and prosper, or else no unit may prosper. The +colored woman beautiful gives the best in her for race advancement. She +works, thinks, and reads to be ready for the need of the tomorrow and +its problems. + +The colored woman beautiful will not carry "chips on her shoulder," +looking for slights and insults. If she carries the thought too strongly +it becomes catching and someone will take up the idea. She will set into +motion lesser vibrations in the minds and bodies of others and the +things she imagines will happen. + +She should resist thoughts of suspicion. She must not think about the +things she wishes to keep secret, for thoughts are contagious. + +The colored woman beautiful does not call another woman "bad" just +because she does not measure up to her ethical code. She must be so +persistent in being good herself that everyone else seems to look and +act good. If God loves the lowest, she can afford to do likewise. She +follows the rule, "Judge not that ye be not judged." She does not make +the mistake of criticising those who have not her strong will power, +lest having stronger projection this unkindness may return swift and +sure to her. To permit the absent to be disparaged or depreciated in her +presence is almost as harmful to herself as if she had said things. + +What is "good" in (another) woman? What is "bad" in (another) woman? +These are two difficult questions to answer and a woman must not judge +by her own standard for herself. Women are inclined to be too narrow in +their viewpoint in judging other women. While one may boast of her +virtue of virtues some women may have a bundle of lesser virtues of +which to boast. It takes more than one virtue to make a good woman. +Many women are unduly vain of their escape from the "sin of sins" and +some of these may have known no temptation. + +When one notes how many good friends a so-called "bad" woman may have, +one wonders why it is. Those who understand the law of vibrations +recognize that the woman has projected something of herself which has +brought her a rich return in spite of her one weakness. + +It is a terrible thing to be a bad example along any line to young +girls, so every colored woman should try to conquer herself and live +down any weakness or error. She should give out the best that is in her +that she may be a good example to younger women. She lets the light of +love and purity shine in her face and transform it, and it will reflect +in the faces of others and make her own soul the happier. + + + + +The Colored Wife Beautiful. + + +Married life is a co-partnership and the wife and husband pledge to +mutual help, when they enter into the marriage contract. + +If in their girlhood wives had only studied men instead of giving up all +their time to so-called "loving and courting," there would not be so +much dissatisfaction, heart-ache and complaint after marriage. A girl +should try to select a man with control over himself, over his voice, +his emotions, even the angle of his hat, and then she should practice +control herself, until the two dispositions have become adjusted to each +other. + +The ignorant girl who marries is full of trust and inexperienced +notions. The disillusionments of life seem to come too fast to suit the +majority. Many young wives immediately become discouraged or desperate +and fall out of the ranks by the wayside of the matrimonial highway, +without trying to live up to their end of the contract, or even +respecting their own vows at the altar. + +"True loving is giving the best within us." When we have company we give +to them the best food, the best linen, the best china and silver-ware +that we own. Yet to those we are pledged to love and cherish we give +anything, and wonder why in return we have failed in receiving love and +all that goes with it. + +A divorce is a terrible "something." It is a blight to children and +often means their ruin or the blasting of their future. If a woman has +children she should try to endure her lot until they are grown. In the +meantime she may prepare herself for a beautiful maturity and an +entrance into the commercial world or another field of activity. + +Of course, if one's husband deserts her there is nothing else to do but +let him go, but if he clings to her and the home, she should use the +protection that his name gives to her until she is sure that she can +buffet the world alone. + +In the larger field of public life a woman without the protection of a +husband's name has a hard lot if she has physical or other attractions. +Widows of both kinds are always under suspicion. If one is lighthearted +and enjoys even innocent pleasure, she may be called a "good timer," or +"fast," and this may injure her advancement in the arena of business +life. + +The protection of the name of any kind of a man, bad, no account, or +cruel, is better than the suffering from cruel suspicions which often +blight the efforts of a sensitive woman, who perhaps in her loneliness +has turned for sympathy this way and that way, until she concludes that +if she suffers in name she may as well be "in the game," and chooses the +wrong way. + +If a woman has money it is quite different. People fawn upon her and she +is less liable to snubbing if Dame Gossip should assail her. + +The first duty of a wife is to keep healthy. Even if she is ailing she +must not complain unless through mental suggestion she desires to +increase her ailments, real or imaginary. She must earnestly endeavor to +discover the cause of the alleged ailment and remove it. + +The colored wife beautiful of today must be a composite woman because +the colored man of today is many sided. They call woman a "creature of +moods" but most men may easily be called susceptible and changeable +creatures, when it comes to the attractions of the opposite sex. + +Today it may be a pretty face which allures him; tomorrow a fine +conversationalist, or a musical person may attract. The next day a woman +with tremendous vitality may charm him. So he wanders, but he does not +intend to stray. One or several streaks in his make-up have been +satisfied, but his wife still stands upon her pedestal as the woman who +bears his name. + +The up-to-date wife realizes his susceptibility (as a man) and is +prepared. She bides her time when like the prodigal, he will surely +return, perhaps mentally and morally purified and a wiser, if a sadder +man. + +If a woman loves her husband and desires to keep him for herself and +family, she must train herself for her many varied duties including +attractiveness, which is a real duty. + +If she thinks that some other woman has her husband's affection, her +thoughts help her to make this so. If she voices the suspicion she +fertilizes the soil and aids the growth or she may crystallize and give +form to rumor. + +Even if there is ground for such a suspicion the up-to-date wife would +not admit it to herself or voice the fact. + +"Man's love is of man's life a part, 'tis woman's whole existence." + +The inexperienced wives forget that they cannot satisfy every mood of a +man without study or effort, unless they are remarkably gifted. Many a +wife has neglected her mind, body and powers and when some woman with +developed powers enters her marriage orbit, she flies off at a tangent, +admits defeat and gets a divorce without putting forth an effort to win +back the husband who is often worth saving. + +It is humiliating to admit, "I have lost my husband!" A wife should +never admit it, even in thought. + +Many a man does not intend to stray and loves his wife but he has been +carried off his feet just for the moment. + +There are Keeley cures to save men, why not husband cures to save homes, +especially those with children whose futures are at stake. + +I know several colored women who have had good ground for doubting +their husband's fidelity who have never allowed the men to know that +they have doubted them. + +One wife made a study of "the woman in the case" and threw her and her +husband together in her home until the man was satiated. In the meantime +she studied herself and the woman to see what it was that attracted her +husband. Then she went into training for the match--war--if it should +come to that--in attractiveness, and she won without telling her secret. + +If a wife will give a man time and will play the attractive game as she +did before marriage, her husband will soon turn his face homeward, and +will wonder what the other charm was. + +Many men are attracted by youth alone and after youth has flown they are +not interested. A wife should study the fancies of her husband if she +desires to hold him, and then begin work upon herself, to hold her +youthful looks. + +Wives must prepare for the dangerous age which they say comes to a woman +between thirty-five and forty-five, and to a man from forty to fifty, +when both are accused of being attracted to younger faces, and when they +do foolish things. A wife must strengthen herself, lest she stray, and +cultivate her own attractive powers lest her husband should incline to +stray. + +A man does not age as quickly as a woman. At fifty a woman is supposed +to be on her decline while a man is in his prime at fifty. + +It is a woman's own fault if, at forty the lines in her face turn down +and if her hair and teeth are all gone. If she is a "nagger" the +reflection will appear in her face. If she has permitted household cares +to swamp her, and reflect themselves in her face and body, she has no +one to blame but herself. + +Many a woman has attracted her husband through her singing, +conversation, or other accomplishments and after marriage has permitted +these to decline, and has not lived up to the ideal that she gave him +before marriage. + +A wife should ask herself if she is living up to the ideal she suggested +before she married, or if she is a disappointment, before she questions +her husband's conduct. + +Some wives think that their morality in wifehood is all sufficient. A +woman may boast of her "virtue" until doom's day, but "if her soul is +small and her heart stingy" her example is not worthy of imitation--for +she is only good to herself. She has no way of proving the ownership of +the "virtue of virtues." It takes many virtues to make one "good," in +the real sense of the word. + +A colored wife should not be discontented without good cause nor should +she complain of monotony when she may choose so many helpful +diversions, and may help to make others happy. + +Every colored wife who has not borne children, or a wife who has lost +children owes a duty to the children of others. + +In fact, these owe a greater debt to posterity than the mother. Such +women should not live for themselves alone, lest they canker. Contact +with youth infuses youthful thoughts and enthusiasm, and keeps a woman's +heart young, and if her heart is young her face will reflect this mental +attitude. + +There are thousands of children with living mothers who still need +"mothering." One may work out her own youth and beauty culture while +"mothering" a little one. It is worth a trial as a youth stimulant. + +There are four great laws given to a wife: + +"Brace up! Brush up! Clean up! Look up!" + + + + +The Colored Mother Beautiful. + + +When a woman enters into the marriage contract--into the partnership of +home making--it is understood that parenthood is to be the chief aim and +hope. + +If a man is good enough to marry and to contribute his support, he is +good enough to be a father or else he should not have been selected. + +A woman who marries and does not intend to have children is merely an +object of convenience who has sold herself. + +To assume the position of colored motherhood is the greatest privilege +and responsibility that can come to any woman in this age. + +The colored mother beautiful carries a heavy burden--the weight of +future generations of a handicapped, persecuted people. She may bless or +curse each succeeding generation; she may change race history; she may +make a more beautiful race with the beauty that comes from beauty of +character and right living. + +What a privilege to carve the destiny of a race! How glorious to look +into the future and see lines of ancestry influenced and advanced by her +thought and example, to see her stamp of personality upon a posterity +which will point to her in pride and thankfulness! + +The time has come when each colored girl must prepare herself for this +rare privilege, when she must distribute her powers and talents for race +good. + +Whatever the colored mother is, millions of colored children will be. A +colored mother lives not only for herself and for her own children, but +she must live for the race. A colored mother is a success as she +measures up to her relation and obligation to the race. + +Negro children of all children need mothers who are strong spiritually, +physically, and intellectually. Enough colored children have been born +under bad or careless conditions. The child born under bad conditions +can not be expected to hold his own among other children. + +No woman has a right to blight the future of her race. Not even her body +may be abused--this beautiful casket--the treasure house of future +souls. Any crime that she commits against herself or her body she +commits against the race. + +Almost any colored mother would lay down her life for her children but +she must have a wider vision into the scheme of life and the world, and +must deliberately plan to make her grand-children and great +grand-children healthier, happier and more useful. + +While it is admitted that heredity is not all, yet inherited tendencies +have great influence. + +The colored mother beautiful must be a living example of all that is +progressive. She must study more about the laws of heredity, and child +culture to prepare the child for its race battle, unhampered by +inherited mental or physical tendencies. + +The "gray matter" in the colored woman's head is the same as the gray +matter in any woman's head. Through the exercise of will power she may +conquer inherited tendencies and even command nature as other women are +doing. + +There are many books which will guide and instruct a prospective mother +who should read and learn all she can on the laws of reproduction. She +should absorb this knowledge that she may be able to impart it to less +informed women. + +The early Romans are said to have surrounded a prospective mother with +examples of courage and strength. + +The mother of Napoleon is an example of the power of pre-natal +direction. She is said to have studied military tactics and to have +visited battlefields. The mother of Michael Angelo is said to have +watched the painters of pictures in the Cathedral. The result was the +greatest artist of the time. + +As mental impressions are as active during the night as in the day, no +prospective mother should carry unpleasant thoughts to bed. The +sub-conscious mind receives the bad thought at bed time and acts all +night under this influence. Its forces affect the same as thoughts +during the day. + +The prospective mother should read good books, think right, live right, +and keep a pure mind and heart, thus developing a deeper nature to +bequeath. + +More than anything else, the prospective colored mother must practice +self-control. All worry is poisonous. Strong thoughts of disgust and +hatred if not controlled during the pre-natal period are liable to leave +disastrous affects. The aim should be to train herself to change any +thought which will create a physical disturbance. + +Mothers who fail to control their tempers, passions, and indulgences too +often weep bitter tears as they see in their off-spring the consequences +of their own wrong doing. + +Someone has said: "Parents transmit deviltry to children and then punish +them for it." Instance after instance of such cruelty could be cited. +Why should parents expect their children to be better than they? + +Anger causes a chemical change which acts like poison to the system of +an adult. It affects the heart, stomach, blood, and nerves and causes +many other disturbances. + +"Often the unborn child's little organism is flooded with shocks of +passion and disturbed by nervous movements which cause unsound mind and +body." + +Altho inheritance comes from two lines of ancestry, the prospective +mother may be able to control and supervise the tendencies from her +line. She must do all in her power before the birth of a child to sway +it for good. She may then save herself years of worry and sorrow and the +race an unworthy example. + +Before and after birth the colored mother beautiful will cultivate and +give out the best in her. No contrary or selfish thought will be +permitted because of the bad effect upon the child. These unpleasant +things will enter soon enough into its life. The mother will faithfully +endeavor to be an example to her children in thought, poise, speech, +personal appearance and in all forms of cleanliness and politeness. + +A child's ideal seldom goes higher than that of its mother. Children +very accurately reflect the thought of their parents. + +How can the child have high ideals and elevating thoughts unless the +mother has them? + +Taste is said to be a faculty of the soul. The mother bequeaths her +taste. + +How can the colored mother beautiful expect her children to have habits +of observation and appreciation of the beautiful in Nature, Art, +Science, Music and Literature, unless the mother has "walked and talked +with nature, has heard the tongues in trees and brooks" as Shakespeare +has said, and has pointed these out to the child? + +If the starlight, the moonlight, the dawn, the sunrise, the sunset, the +blue sky, the tranquility of a summer day or the grandeur of a storm +have no response in the mother's soul, then how can a child be expected +to lift its eyes and see the beautiful everywhere, every day and absorb +the benefits from such communion? + +The physical feeding of a child occurs but three times a day but the +spiritual, mental and moral feeding goes on all the rest of the time. +Children should be fed ideals of thought and affection to counteract +the evil effect of thoughts of passion. + +The colored child should be taught to think and should be given +opportunity for a quiet hour for self communion and self entertainment. +It should be taught to live a period of solitude so that in after life +it may not always be compelled to hunt around for entertainment and +excitement. + +How can the child be expected to love reading if the mother does not +read to it? + +How can the child love music if the mother does not play or sing to it +or teach it songs? + +How many nights are wasted that might be spent in giving colored +children ideals of home life and right habits in reading and home study? + +Colored children have been left alone too much. + +How many of them have a children's hour? How many have been given +something to think about? How many spend their spare moments in +reading? How many can recite poems or give quotations from the master +writers? + +The mothers themselves must put some time in exerting their minds in +reading and thinking with a view towards mentally improving the next +generation. They must observe and note what is passing on in the great +world. History is being made every day. How can the child resist the +desires of the lower nature when its mother has tantrums? The colored +mother must refuse to express passion. A mother can not shame or beat +her child into gentle manners when she is rough or coarse. + +How can the child be careful and controlled in speech if the mother has +not the power of expressing herself in good English. Language is too +powerful a weapon in reaching, compelling and swaying the feelings of +others and in winning friends--to be neglected. + +Children always betray home training. If they have not been trained +properly as they are not adepts in dissembling and they reflect their +mothers in all their thought, speech and actions. + +The mother who is strict in her own conduct and who pays careful +attention to the home conduct of her children will seldom be ashamed of +their deportment. Good habits may not be assumed at a moment's notice. +The good breeding of parents is very truly reflected in the manners of +their children. + +It is sad to have the children learn the laws of politeness and good +breeding outside the home, and to watch them assume that which should be +innate. + +It is sad to hear little children lie about their home training +pretending that "My mother makes me do this or that" when they know that +the mother has failed to make a strong point of this particular fault. + +It is sadder still to hear colored children say, "I can't." The colored +mother should put success in the child's thought and teach it to believe +in himself and his race. It is the duty of every mother to preach +success and one's duty to aim to excel along all lines. + +How can the child be clean and love cleanliness when its mother is +habitually untidy and slovenly? The colored mother beautiful would no +more exhibit herself unclean than naked. She would no more walk slovenly +than to dress slovenly. If a mother wears unclean clothes, has unclean +thoughts or unclean manners, her children will reflect her. + +How can a child hold her head up and her back straight when her mother +slouches around and forgets that her body belongs to God as well as her +soul. + +The colored mother beautiful makes a point of teaching her child to be +true and helpful to the race, and to speak up for the good points and +keep silent about the weaknesses when before other races. Every race has +strong and weak points. + +She should take part in efforts for the advancement of the race. No one +can lift the race unless he stays in it. A child should be taught not to +depreciate the race any more than it would itself. + +No one is so big and strong that he can exist alone. All of us are +dependent to a degree. Each one will need friends. There are no friends +which mean so much to us as those of our own race. + +The percentage of physical deformities in colored children is lessening. +Colored mothers are learning to study children's faces and bodies in +order to change and correct their physical defects. Bowed and weak legs, +outstanding ears, misshapen mouths, noses and teeth are being corrected +according to scientific rules. Then, too, they are training children to +do things to improve their own physical defects without--of +course--causing them to be over conscious. + +The colored mother beautiful is the health officer of the race as well +as her own posterity. It is her duty to see to it that her children have +clean bodies inside and outside. She will see to it that in her +neighborhood there will be more regard for health, drainage, and other +sanitary conditions. She will pursue the deadly fly and cause this pest +and all vermin to be eradicated. + +She will study up on the kinds and amounts of food to give children that +they may not be fed the coarse, greasy food which coarsens the instinct, +or may make them gluttonous, which will abuse the stomach and cause +unnatural heat that may wreck them morally. Instead, she advocates the +light brain forming food to lift them above the dominant animal +tendencies. + +She controls the child's play which is so necessary to health and which +at the present day aims for educational results. + +A colored girl's estimate and idea of colored womanhood comes from her +mother. + +The colored mother beautiful will not give the best to strangers in +preference to home folks, nor will she expect her daughter to receive +politeness from other boys and men when her brothers and men in the +house keep their hats on, smoke and talk in loud disrespectful tones +before her. + +A colored mother will teach her daughter to command respect from all +boys and men and not to capitulate in any way. To do this she will teach +her daughter that she must conquer or control her lower nature and not +permit privileges with her body or her given name. Her conduct at home +and on the street must also command this. Her daughter will no more use +the Lord's name in exclamation than any other profanity. She must be +taught not to hang out or talk outside of the windows. + +She must be taught that she is never to stand and talk to men on the +street, also that she must not continue a conversation with a man or boy +who shows he has no respect for her. She will demand a respectful +attitude if she is a good girl or else she should excuse herself from +further conversation and association. + +The daughter of the colored woman beautiful will be taught to expect +boys and men to tip their hats in meeting and parting, and she will not +encourage them to sit in her presence if she stands unless they are her +elders, superiors, or invalids. If necessary she will exaggerate the +importance of these seemingly small courtesies to impress them upon +other younger and less thoughtful girls. + +Such a daughter will be taught to count for something besides clothes +and looks. She will pass an intemperate or immoral man as she would +something polluted, for both are irresponsible and she may suffer from +even a moment's contact. + +This daughter must be taught not to marry for support or for money. That +is selfish and cowardly. Love should be the basis of marriage because +after the honeymoon is past there are responsibilities, troubles, +sorrows and self-sacrifice which need the stimulation of the "Love +light." + +The daughter of the colored woman beautiful will aim to marry a man +mentally and physically fit to be the father of her children. An +immoral, vile-tongued, untruthful or diseased father is a curse to his +race. It is her duty and aim to improve racial stock. + +This daughter will study the ethics of the period of engagement and will +not abuse or destroy the mysterious charm which belongs alone to the +early period of wife-hood. + +A girl should be taught the duties of married life; to fulfil the +beautiful aim of motherhood should be her ambition and her daily prayer. + +Boys, also, get their estimate of colored womanhood from their mothers. + +A whipping, striking, scolding, threatening, "shut-up" mother presents +him a wrong view point of real motherhood. + +The colored mother beautiful will teach her son to respect colored +womanhood and to show this respect in every word and action. He is not +supposed to know the "wheat from the tare." To any woman in all the +small courtesies of life he will reflect his mother's home training. He +will be taught to look up to, and to show special respect and reverence +for the great women and men of the race. + +Even in the way he puts on or takes off his hat he reflects his mother. + +If a colored boy is expected to tip his hat to any woman, he should tip +it to the women of his mother's race. + +If it is expected that he should stand erect before any woman, he should +before the women of his mother's race. Off will go his hat, if even +asked a question. His voice, his eyes, his backbone, his heels, all +reflect his mother and her training. In spite of protest he will never +sit if a woman is standing unless he is ill or a cripple. Especially +does he exhibit the mother training he has received from his manner in +his actions to colored women. + +If he is expected to speak respectfully to any woman he should to the +women of his mother's race. + +If he works faithfully for any woman who employs him he should work +faithfully for a woman of his mother's race. + +When he marries he should select a woman of his mother's race--a Colored +Woman. His mother will teach him that a good wife is about the best +thing in the world. + +He will be taught to support and trust his wife as he did his mother +and never doubt her until he has positive proof that she is unworthy. +He will never publicly put another woman before his wife if he lives +with her. As long as a wife bears his name and stays under his roof she +is entitled to the respect that her title is supposed to carry. He would +never go about complaining of his wife for that is small and cowardly. +He will tip his hat as gallantly to his wife as to another woman and +kiss her with uncovered head to show his respect to the woman he has +chosen to bear his name. + +The son of the colored mother beautiful will not smoke in the presence +of his wife or friends unless he is sure it is unobjectionable and he +should regard this as a privilege rather than a masculine right. He will +be taught to wear his coat at table and regard it also as a privilege if +he appears otherwise. He will be taught that it is unmanly to tattle and +gossip. + +He will be taught that it is vulgar and low to quarrel especially in +the home. No man will strike a woman no matter what the provocation +might be any more than it would have been right for his father to strike +his mother. A man who is unable to control himself in anger is a weak +man and is hardly fit to be a husband, much less father. Belonging to a +race full of impulse and emotion he must be taught to control his +emotions as he would his appetite. Culture and manliness are really +restraint. + +He will be taught to remember the vital sex difference in strength and +physique and will not permit a woman to lift or reach unnecessarily--not +even to help with his coat. He will not preach a double standard of +morality for the men and women unless he practices what he preaches and +has always been pure. + +Early in the boy's life the colored mother beautiful will teach him to +keep as pure in thought and deed as girls are expected to be. He will +be given a right idea of the sacred sex organs and will be taught their +health--value and the price of their abuse. Self mastery will be the +watchword in thought, even in sleep and recreation. + +The colored mother beautiful will teach her son not to lie and steal or +to use intoxicants and profane language. She will teach him to keep both +his inward and outward body clean. She shall insist that he keep his +lips "in" while his chest will be out. The son will be taught the value +of a good name and that fondness for work is one of the best +recommendations in the world. He will be taught not to scorn or neglect +his chores and to help his mother in the housework, not only because it +is his duty but because it will prepare him for the duties of married +life when he may be able to help his wife or instruct her if it should +be necessary. + +The colored mother beautiful will teach her son to be a little man and +not to receive "penny tips" like a beggar. He should be taught to do +neighborly favors without pay, after first asking his mother for +permission. If he must have money let him work for wages that he may be +his own business boss. He should never be permitted to ask any one but +his parents for pennies and he should be encouraged not to expect or +accept them. + +A boy should be expected to walk with a graceful carriage and present an +attractive personal appearance in the way of clothes, teeth, hair and +nails as well as a girl. + +Early in life he should be taught to invest in a savings bank, to get +the saving habit. + +The habit of reading good books should be made a part of his daily work +as a preparation for the idle hour when he would otherwise seek +excitement and harmful association. + +A boy should be taught the duties of married life and what to expect +from a good wife. + +He should be warned of pitfalls and how vicious girls and women play +upon men's physical weaknesses for selfish purposes. Any abuse or excess +may ruin his health and happiness. + +He should be taught to appreciate the qualities in a girl which will +make congeniality during the long married life which has trials of which +courtship never dreams. + +He should be taught to seek and appreciate good, respectable girls and +to associate with the best people. + +If the day should come to the colored Mother Beautiful when after years +of patient sacrifice and toil, all her hopes and dreams are cruelly +dashed to earth and the child so carefully nurtured refuses to do her +duty to parent and race and will not help to make the race and world +better by having lived in it, or, when perhaps, the child is a disgrace +to her parents and the race, the mother must conceal her agony and +grief and still keep a serene countenance. + +In silent meditation she looks back over all the years in which she has +tried to rear a creditable member of the race and society. If, after +honest review, down in her heart she can truthfully say, "I have raised +my child to the best of my knowledge," then she may leave the rest in +the hands of the "Creator." Perhaps he will reward her efforts, in a +future generation, while she is yet on earth. + +A disappointed colored Mother Beautiful does not envy other Mothers nor +does she criticise their daughters. + +Suffering opens the door to a wider vision in life and if she looks +around she will find forgetfulness in helping others. It is never too +late to begin. + +Perhaps the Colored Mother Beautiful will be spared to see the day when +her children leave the home honorably. Although it almost breaks her +heart because she is no more to be the guiding light and comforter, she +yields the sceptre of authority gracefully and willingly and steps into +the background. She may see a rough voyage ahead for the young life +travelers, but she may not interfere nor advise these loved ones unless +asked. Even then she remembers that experience is the greatest teacher +and strengthener and that it is best for them to walk life's journey +alone. + +The peace and contentment that comes from having done her whole duty +gives her a spiritual beauty of countenance that comes from the other +world; the habit of right living through right thought, reflects in her +face and gives her a physical beauty that comes in no other way. + +At the last, the Still Small Voice Whispers, "Well done, thou good and +faithful servant of a persecuted race. You have done what you could. No +one can do more. Receive your eternal reward," and the face is illumined +with the beauty that shall endure forever. + + + * * * * * + +Transcriber's note + + +The following changes have been made to the text: + +p. 13: "Laws of Attraction" changed to "Law of Attraction". + +p. 25: "pyschically" changed to "psychically". + +p. 66: "I wont" changed to "I won't". + +p. 93: "so called friends" changed to "so-called friends". + +p. 97: "perservere" changed to "persevere". + +p. 104: "abcesses" changed to "abscesses". + +p. 154: "parents roof" changed to "parents' roof". + +p. 178: "posterity then" changed to "posterity than". + +p. 187: "that that" changed to "than that". + + + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's The Colored Girl Beautiful, by E. Azalia Hackley + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE COLORED GIRL BEAUTIFUL *** + +***** This file should be named 31340.txt or 31340.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/3/1/3/4/31340/ + +Produced by Suzanne Shell, Carla Foust and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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