summaryrefslogtreecommitdiff
path: root/30035-h
diff options
context:
space:
mode:
Diffstat (limited to '30035-h')
-rw-r--r--30035-h/30035-h.htm675
-rw-r--r--30035-h/images/001.pngbin0 -> 36606 bytes
-rw-r--r--30035-h/images/002-1.jpgbin0 -> 29383 bytes
-rw-r--r--30035-h/images/002-2.jpgbin0 -> 178889 bytes
4 files changed, 675 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/30035-h/30035-h.htm b/30035-h/30035-h.htm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..42b385e
--- /dev/null
+++ b/30035-h/30035-h.htm
@@ -0,0 +1,675 @@
+<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN"
+ "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd">
+
+<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en">
+ <head>
+ <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=UTF-8" />
+ <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" />
+ <title>
+ The Project Gutenberg eBook of Off Course, by Mack Reynolds
+ </title>
+ <style type="text/css">
+
+ p {margin-top: .75em; text-align: justify; margin-bottom: .75em;}
+ h1,h2,.hd1 {text-align: center; font-weight: normal;}
+ hr {width: 45%; margin: 2em auto; visibility: hidden;}
+ body {margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%;}
+ .rgt {text-align: right; margin-top: 2em;}
+ .figc {margin: 0 auto; width: 600px;}
+ img {border: none;}
+ a:link,a:visited {text-decoration: none;}
+ p.cap:first-letter {float: left; margin-right: .05em; padding-top: .05em; font-size: 300%; line-height: .8em; width: auto;}
+ .dcap {text-transform: uppercase;}
+ .figt {float: left; clear: left; margin: 15px; padding: 0; width: 297px;}
+ .trn {border: solid 1px; margin: 3em 15%; min-height: 230px;}
+ .trn p {margin: 15px;}
+ .bk1 {margin: 1em auto; width: 30em;}
+ .sp1 {font-size: 150%;}
+ .hd1 {margin-bottom: 3em;}
+
+ </style>
+ </head>
+<body>
+<div>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 30035 ***</div>
+
+<div class="figc"><img src="images/001.png" width="600" height="392" alt="" title="" /></div>
+
+<div class="bk1"><p><big><i>Shure and begorra, it was a great day for the Earth! The
+first envoy from another world was about to speak&mdash;that
+is, if he could forget that horse for a minute....</i></big></p></div>
+
+<h1><b><span class="sp1">off course</span></b></h1>
+
+<h2>By Mack Reynolds</h2>
+
+<p class="hd1">Illustrated by Kelly Freas</p>
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">First on</span> the scene were Larry
+Dermott and Tim Casey of the
+State Highway Patrol. They assumed
+they were witnessing the
+crash of a new type of Air Force
+plane and slipped and skidded desperately
+across the field to within
+thirty feet of the strange craft, only
+to discover that the landing had
+been made without accident.</p>
+
+<p>Patrolman Dermott shook his
+head. "They're gettin' queerer looking
+every year. Get a load of it&mdash;no
+wheels, no propeller, no cockpit."</p>
+
+<p>They left the car and made their
+way toward the strange egg-shaped
+vessel.</p>
+
+<p>Tim Casey loosened his .38 in its
+holster and said, "Sure, and I'm
+beginning to wonder if it's one of
+ours. No insignia and&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>A circular door slid open at that
+point and Dameri Tass stepped out,
+yawning. He spotted them, smiled
+and said, "Glork."</p>
+
+<p>They gaped at him.</p>
+
+<p>"Glork is right," Dermott swallowed.</p>
+
+<p>Tim Casey closed his mouth with
+an effort. "Do you mind the color
+of his face?" he blurted.</p>
+
+<p>"How could I help it?"</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass rubbed a blue-nailed
+pink hand down his purplish countenance
+and yawned again. "Gorra
+manigan horp soratium," he said.</p>
+
+<p>Patrolman Dermott and Patrolman
+Casey shot stares at each other.
+"'Tis double talk he's after givin'
+us," Casey said.</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass frowned. "Harama?"
+he asked.</p>
+
+<p>Larry Dermott pushed his cap to
+the back of his head. "That doesn't
+sound like any language I've even
+<i>heard</i> about."</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass grimaced, turned
+and reentered his spacecraft to
+emerge in half a minute with his
+hands full of contraption. He held
+a box-like arrangement under his
+left arm; in his right hand were two
+metal caps connected to the box
+by wires.</p>
+
+<p>While the patrolmen watched
+him, he set the box on the ground,
+twirled two dials and put one of the
+caps on his head. He offered the
+other to Larry Dermott; his desire
+was obvious.</p>
+
+<p>Trained to grasp a situation and
+immediately respond in manner best
+suited to protect the welfare of the
+people of New York State, Dermott
+cleared his throat and said, "Tim,
+take over while I report."</p>
+
+<p>"Hey!" Casey protested, but his
+fellow minion had left.</p>
+
+<p>"Mandaia," Dameri Tass told
+Casey, holding out the metal cap.</p>
+
+<p>"Faith, an' do I look balmy?"
+Casey told him. "I wouldn't be
+puttin' that dingus on my head for
+all the colleens in Ireland."</p>
+
+<p>"Mandaia," the stranger said
+impatiently.</p>
+
+<p>"Bejasus," Casey snorted, "ye
+can't&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>Dermott called from the car,
+"Tim, the captain says to humor
+this guy. We're to keep him here
+until the officials arrive."</p>
+
+<p>Tim Casey closed his eyes and
+groaned. "Humor him, he's after
+sayin'. Orders it is." He shouted
+back, "Sure, an' did ye tell 'em he's
+in technicolor? Begorra, he looks
+like a man from Mars."</p>
+
+<p>"That's what they think," Larry
+yelled, "and the governor is on his
+way. We're to do everything possible
+short of violence to keep this
+character here. Humor him, Tim!"</p>
+
+<p>"Mandaia," Dameri Tass
+snapped, pushing the cap into
+Casey's reluctant hands.</p>
+
+<p>Muttering his protests, Casey
+lifted it gingerly and placed it on
+his head. Not feeling any immediate
+effect, he said, "There, 'tis satisfied
+ye are now, I'm supposin'."</p>
+
+<p>The alien stooped down and
+flicked a switch on the little box.
+It hummed gently. Tim Casey suddenly
+shrieked and sat down on the
+stubble and grass of the field. "Begorra,"
+he yelped, "I've been murthered!"
+He tore the cap from
+his head.</p>
+
+<p>His companion came running,
+"What's the matter, Tim?" he
+shouted.</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass removed the metal
+cap from his own head. "Sure, an'
+nothin' is after bein' the matter
+with him," he said. "Evidently the
+bhoy has niver been a-wearin' of
+a kerit helmet afore. 'Twill hurt
+him not at all."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">"You can</span> talk!" Dermott
+blurted, skidding to a stop.</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass shrugged. "Faith, an'
+why not? As I was after sayin', I
+shared the kerit helmet with Tim
+Casey."</p>
+
+<p>Patrolman Dermott glared at him
+unbelievingly. "You learned the
+language just by sticking that Rube
+Goldberg deal on Tim's head?"</p>
+
+<p>"Sure, an' why not?"</p>
+
+<p>Dermott muttered, "And with it
+he has to pick up the corniest
+brogue west of Dublin."</p>
+
+<p>Tim Casey got to his feet indignantly.
+"I'm after resentin' that,
+Larry Dermott. Sure, an' the way
+we talk in Ireland is&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass interrupted, pointing
+to a bedraggled horse that had
+made its way to within fifty feet of
+the vessel. "Now what could that
+be after bein'?"</p>
+
+<p>The patrolmen followed his stare.
+"It's a horse. What else?"</p>
+
+<p>"A horse?"</p>
+
+<p>Larry Dermott looked again, just
+to make sure. "Yeah&mdash;not much of
+a horse, but a horse."</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass sighed ecstatically.
+"And jist what is a horse, if I may
+be so bold as to be askin'?"</p>
+
+<p>"It's an animal you ride on."</p>
+
+<p>The alien tore his gaze from the
+animal to look his disbelief at the
+other. "Are you after meanin' that
+you climb upon the crature's back
+and ride him? Faith now, quit your
+blarney."</p>
+
+<p>He looked at the horse again,
+then down at his equipment. "Begorra,"
+he muttered, "I'll share the
+kerit helmet with the crature."</p>
+
+<p>"Hey, hold it," Dermott said anxiously.
+He was beginning to feel
+like a character in a shaggy dog
+story.</p>
+
+<p>Interest in the horse was ended
+with the sudden arrival of a helicopter.
+It swooped down on the
+field and settled within twenty feet
+of the alien craft. Almost before it
+had touched, the door was flung
+open and the flying windmill disgorged
+two bestarred and efficient-looking
+Army officers.</p>
+
+<p>Casey and Dermott snapped them
+a salute.</p>
+
+<p>The senior general didn't take
+his eyes from the alien and the
+spacecraft as he spoke, and they
+bugged quite as effectively as had
+those of the patrolmen when they'd
+first arrived on the scene.</p>
+
+<p>"I'm Major General Browning,"
+he rapped. "I want a police cordon
+thrown up around this, er, vessel.
+No newsmen, no sightseers, nobody
+without my permission. As soon as
+Army personnel arrives, we'll take
+over completely."</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, sir," Larry Dermott said. "I
+just got a report on the radio that
+the governor is on his way, sir. How
+about him?"</p>
+
+<p>The general muttered something
+under his breath. Then, "When the
+governor arrives, let me know;
+otherwise, nobody gets through!"</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass said, "Faith, and
+what goes on?"</p>
+
+<p>The general's eyes bugged still
+further. "<i>He talks!</i>" he accused.</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, sir," Dermott said. "He
+had some kind of a machine. He
+put it over Tim's head and seconds
+later he could talk."</p>
+
+<p>"Nonsense!" the general snapped.</p>
+
+<p>Further discussion was interrupted
+by the screaming arrival of
+several motorcycle patrolmen followed
+by three heavily laden patrol
+cars. Overhead, pursuit planes
+zoomed in and began darting about
+nervously above the field.</p>
+
+<p>"Sure, and it's quite a reception
+I'm after gettin'," Dameri Tass said.
+He yawned. "But what I'm wantin'
+is a chance to get some sleep. Faith,
+an' I've been awake for almost a
+<i>decal</i>."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Dameri Tass</span> was hurried, via
+helicopter, to Washington. There
+he disappeared for several days,
+being held incommunicado while
+White House, Pentagon, State Department
+and Congress tried to
+figure out just what to do with him.</p>
+
+<p>Never in the history of the planet
+had such a furor arisen. Thus far,
+no newspapermen had been allowed
+within speaking distance. Administration
+higher-ups were being subjected
+to a volcano of editorial heat
+but the longer the space alien was
+discussed the more they viewed with
+alarm the situation his arrival had
+precipitated. There were angles that
+hadn't at first been evident.</p>
+
+<p>Obviously he was from some civilization
+far beyond that of Earth's.
+That was the rub. No matter what
+he said, it would shake governments,
+possibly overthrow social systems,
+perhaps even destroy established religious
+concepts.</p>
+
+<p>But they couldn't keep him under
+wraps indefinitely.</p>
+
+<p>It was the United Nations that
+cracked the iron curtain. Their demands
+that the alien be heard before
+their body were too strong and
+had too much public opinion behind
+them to be ignored. The White
+House yielded and the date was set
+for the visitor to speak before the
+Assembly.</p>
+
+<p>Excitement, anticipation, blanketed
+the world. Shepherds in Sinkiang,
+multi-millionaires in Switzerland,
+fakirs in Pakistan, gauchos in
+the Argentine were raised to a
+zenith of expectation. Panhandlers
+debated the message to come with
+pedestrians; jinrikisha men argued
+it with their passengers; miners discussed
+it deep beneath the surface;
+pilots argued with their co-pilots
+thousands of feet above.</p>
+
+<p>It was the most universally
+awaited event of the ages.</p>
+
+<p>By the time the delegates from
+every nation, tribe, religion, class,
+color, and race had gathered in
+New York to receive the message
+from the stars, the majority of
+Earth had decided that Dameri
+Tass was the plenipotentiary of a
+super-civilization which had been
+viewing developments on this planet
+with misgivings. It was thought
+this other civilization had advanced
+greatly beyond Earth's and that the
+problems besetting us&mdash;social, economic,
+scientific&mdash;had been solved
+by the super-civilization. Obviously,
+then, Dameri Tass had come, an
+advisor from a benevolent and
+friendly people, to guide the world
+aright.</p>
+
+<p>And nine-tenths of the population
+of Earth stood ready and willing
+to be guided. The other tenth
+liked things as they were and were
+quite convinced that the space
+envoy would upset their applecarts.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Viljalmar Andersen</span>, Secretary-General
+of the U.N., was to
+introduce the space emissary. "Can
+you give me an idea at all of what
+he is like?" he asked nervously.</p>
+
+<p>President McCord was as upset
+as the Dane. He shrugged in agitation.
+"I know almost as little as
+you do."</p>
+
+<p>Sir Alfred Oxford protested, "But
+my dear chap, you've had him for
+almost two weeks. Certainly in that
+time&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>The President snapped back,
+"You probably won't believe this,
+but he's been asleep until yesterday.
+When he first arrived he told us he
+hadn't slept for a <i>decal</i>, whatever
+that is; so we held off our discussion
+with him until morning. Well&mdash;he
+didn't awaken in the morning,
+nor the next. Six days later, fearing
+something was wrong we woke
+him."</p>
+
+<p>"What happened?" Sir Alfred
+asked.</p>
+
+<p>The President showed embarrassment.
+"He used some rather ripe
+Irish profanity on us, rolled over,
+and went back to sleep."</p>
+
+<p>Viljalmar Andersen asked, "Well,
+what happened yesterday?"</p>
+
+<p>"We actually haven't had time to
+question him. Among other things,
+there's been some controversy about
+whose jurisdiction he comes under.
+The State Department claims the
+Army shouldn't&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>The Secretary General sighed
+deeply. "Just what <i>did</i> he do?"</p>
+
+<p>"The Secret Service reports he
+spent the day whistling Mother Machree
+and playing with his dog, cat
+and mouse."</p>
+
+<p>"Dog, cat and mouse? I say!"
+blurted Sir Alfred.</p>
+
+<p>The President was defensive. "He
+had to have some occupation, and
+he seems to be particularly interested
+in our animal life. He wanted
+a horse but compromised for the
+others. I understand he insists all
+three of them come with him wherever
+he goes."</p>
+
+<p>"I wish we knew what he was
+going to say," Andersen worried.</p>
+
+<p>"Here he comes," said Sir Alfred.</p>
+
+<p>Surrounded by F.B.I. men,
+Dameri Tass was ushered to the
+speaker's stand. He had a kitten in
+his arms; a Scotty followed him.</p>
+
+<p>The alien frowned worriedly.
+"Sure," he said, "and what kin all
+this be? Is it some ordinance I've
+been after breakin'?"</p>
+
+<p>McCord, Sir Alfred and Andersen
+hastened to reassure him and
+made him comfortable in a chair.</p>
+
+<p>Viljalmar Andersen faced the
+thousands in the audience and held
+up his hands, but it was ten minutes
+before he was able to quiet the
+cheering, stamping delegates from
+all Earth.</p>
+
+<p>Finally: "Fellow Terrans, I shall
+not take your time for a lengthy
+introduction of the envoy from the
+stars. I will only say that, without
+doubt, this is the most important
+moment in the history of the human
+race. We will now hear from the
+first being to come to Earth from
+another world."</p>
+
+<p>He turned and gestured to Dameri
+Tass who hadn't been paying
+overmuch attention to the chairman
+in view of some dog and cat
+hostilities that had been developing
+about his feet.</p>
+
+<p>But now the alien's purplish face
+faded to a light blue. He stood and
+said hoarsely. "Faith, an' what was
+that last you said?"</p>
+
+<p>Viljalmar Andersen repeated,
+"We will now hear from the first
+being ever to come to Earth from
+another world."</p>
+
+<p>The face of the alien went a
+lighter blue. "Sure, an' ye wouldn't
+jist be frightenin' a body, would
+ye? You don't mean to tell me this
+planet isn't after bein' a member of
+the Galactic League?"</p>
+
+<p>Andersen's face was blank. "Galactic
+League?"</p>
+
+<p>"Cushlamachree," Dameri Tass
+moaned. "I've gone and put me
+foot in it again. I'll be after getting
+<i>kert</i> for this."</p>
+
+<p>Sir Alfred was on his feet. "I
+don't understand! Do you mean you
+aren't an envoy from another
+planet?"</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass held his head in his
+hands and groaned. "An envoy, he's
+sayin', and meself only a second-rate
+collector of specimens for the Carthis
+zoo."</p>
+
+<p>He straightened and started off
+the speaker's stand. "Sure, an' I
+must blast off immediately."</p>
+
+<p>Things were moving fast for
+President McCord but already an
+edge of relief was manifesting itself.
+Taking the initiative, he said, "Of
+course, of course, if that is your
+desire." He signaled to the bodyguard
+who had accompanied the
+alien to the assemblage.</p>
+
+<p>A dull roar was beginning to
+emanate from the thousands gathered
+in the tremendous hall, murmuring,
+questioning, disbelieving.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Viljalmar Andersen</span> felt that
+he must say something. He extended
+a detaining hand. "Now you
+are here," he said urgently, "even
+though by mistake, before you go
+can't you give us some brief word?
+Our world is in chaos. Many of us
+have lost faith. Perhaps ..."</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass shook off the restraining
+hand. "Do I look daft?
+Begorry, I should have been
+a-knowin' something was queer. All
+your weapons and your strange
+ideas. Faith, I wouldn't be surprised
+if ye hadn't yet established
+a planet-wide government. Sure,
+an' I'll go still further. Ye probably
+still have wars on this benighted
+world. No wonder it is ye
+haven't been invited to join the
+Galactic League an' take your place
+among the civilized planets."</p>
+
+<p>He hustled from the rostrum and
+made his way, still surrounded by
+guards, to the door by which he had
+entered. The dog and the cat trotted
+after, undismayed by the furor
+about them.</p>
+
+<p>They arrived about four hours
+later at the field on which he'd
+landed, and the alien from space
+hurried toward his craft, still muttering.
+He'd been accompanied by a
+general and by the President, but
+all the way he had refrained from
+speaking.</p>
+
+<p>He scurried from the car and
+toward the spacecraft.</p>
+
+<p>President McCord said, "You've
+forgotten your pets. We would be
+glad if you would accept them as&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>The alien's face faded a light
+blue again. "Faith, an' I'd almost
+forgotten," he said. "If I'd taken
+a crature from this quarantined
+planet, my name'd be <i>nork</i>. Keep
+your dog and your kitty." He shook
+his head sadly and extracted a
+mouse from a pocket. "An' this
+amazin' little crature as well."</p>
+
+<p>They followed him to the spacecraft.
+Just before entering, he spotted
+the bedraggled horse that had
+been present on his landing.</p>
+
+<p>A longing expression came over
+his highly colored face. "Jist one
+thing," he said. "Faith now, were
+they pullin' my leg when they said
+you were after ridin' on the back of
+those things?"</p>
+
+<p>The President looked at the woebegone
+nag. "It's a horse," he said,
+surprised. "Man has been riding
+them for centuries."</p>
+
+<p>Dameri Tass shook his head.
+"Sure, an' 'twould've been my
+makin' if I could've taken one back
+to Carthis." He entered his vessel.</p>
+
+<p>The others drew back, out of
+range of the expected blast, and
+watched, each with his own
+thoughts, as the first visitor from
+space hurriedly left Earth.</p>
+
+<p class="rgt"><b>... THE END</b></p>
+
+<div class="trn"><div class="figt"><a href="images/002-2.jpg"><img src="images/002-1.jpg" width="297" height="200" alt="" title="" /></a></div>
+
+<p><big><b>Transcriber's Note:</b></big></p>
+
+<p>This etext was produced from <i>If Worlds of Science Fiction</i> January 1954.
+Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S.
+copyright on this publication was renewed. Minor spelling and
+typographical errors have been corrected without note.</p></div>
+
+<div>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 30035 ***</div>
+</body>
+</html>
diff --git a/30035-h/images/001.png b/30035-h/images/001.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..b904d1f
--- /dev/null
+++ b/30035-h/images/001.png
Binary files differ
diff --git a/30035-h/images/002-1.jpg b/30035-h/images/002-1.jpg
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..002d1f4
--- /dev/null
+++ b/30035-h/images/002-1.jpg
Binary files differ
diff --git a/30035-h/images/002-2.jpg b/30035-h/images/002-2.jpg
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..06691c1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/30035-h/images/002-2.jpg
Binary files differ