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diff --git a/29911.txt b/29911.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..a5238c6 --- /dev/null +++ b/29911.txt @@ -0,0 +1,6188 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Strand Magazine, Volume V, Issue 25, +January 1893, by Various + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Strand Magazine, Volume V, Issue 25, January 1893 + An Illustrated Monthly + +Author: Various + +Editor: George Newnes + +Release Date: September 5, 2009 [EBook #29911] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STRAND MAGAZINE, JANUARY 1893 *** + + + + +Produced by Victorian/Edwardian Pictorial Magazines, +Jonathan Ingram, Josephine Paolucci and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net. + + + + + + + + +THE + +STRAND MAGAZINE + +_An Illustrated Monthly_ + +EDITED BY + +GEORGE NEWNES + +Vol. V. + +_JANUARY TO JUNE_ + + +_London_: + +GEORGE NEWNES, LTD., 8, 9, 10, & 11, SOUTHAMPTON STREET, AND EXETER +STREET, STRAND. + +1893. + + + + +THE + +STRAND MAGAZINE + +_An Illustrated Monthly_ + +Vol. 5, Issue. 25. + +January 1893 + +[Illustration: "WE SWEAR!" + +(_Margarita, the Bond Queen of the Wandering Dhahs._)] + + + + +_Shafts from an Eastern Quiver._ + +VII--MARGARITA, THE BOND QUEEN OF THE WANDERING DHAHS. + +BY CHARLES J. MANSFORD, B. A. + + +I. + +"The Cingalese declare that the Queen of the Dhahs is a Sahibmem," said +Hassan--meaning by this expression an Englishwoman. + +"I don't think that can be true," responded Denviers; "it is hardly +possible that any civilized human being would care to reign over such a +queer race as those just described appear to be----" + +"The Englishman is wrong in what he says," interrupted an +indolent-looking native, "for I once saw her myself!" + +"You!" I exclaimed, "then tell us what you know about this queen." The +native was, however, by no means disposed to conversation, or indeed to +do anything that disturbed his serenity. + +From Southern India we had crossed over to Ceylon, and after a somewhat +prolonged stay at Colombo, struck into the interior of the island. We +visited Kandi, and having travelled for some days in the hilly district +which surrounds it, arrived at the palm-covered hut of a Cingalese +labourer, where, in spite of his protests, we stayed for a day to rest +ourselves. Round the stems of the palms about us we saw, high up, that +dead brushwood had been placed, by the rustling of which at night our +unwilling host could tell if his few neighbours contemplated robbing him +of the fruits of his toil. The only work, however, which he seemed to do +was to stand at the door of his hut and gaze vacantly at the plantation +of palm trees which he owned, and to shake his head--usually in the +negative--whenever we attempted to entice him into a conversation. + +"Well," said Denviers, looking with annoyance at our host, "if this +Cingalese is too idle to tell us the full facts, I suppose we had better +find them out for ourselves." Then turning to the man he asked:-- + +"How far is the district over which these strange Dhahs are said to +wander?" The native pointed slowly to the north and then answered:-- + +[Illustration: "THE NATIVE POINTED TO THE NORTH."] + +"The Dhahs were wandering afar in the forest when last I saw them, which +was fully a day's journey from here, but the sun was hot and I grew +tired." His remark certainly did not convey much information to us, but +before an hour had elapsed we set out, guided only by the forest, which +could be seen far away in the distance. Hour after hour passed until at +last evening came, and even then we were only entering upon the fringe +of the great forest which rose before us, and seemed to shut out the sky +as we wandered into the thickness of the undergrowth and gazed up at the +lofty tops of the trees which bent each other's branches as they +interlaced one with another. + +We stopped at last to rest and to refresh ourselves, after which we +reclined upon the ground, facing a wide clearing in the forest, where we +laid talking idly for some time, until the voice of Hassan warned us +that someone was approaching. We listened attentively for a minute, but +no sound could be heard by us save that of the fluttering of the wings +of some bird among the branches above. + +"You heard nothing, Hassan," said Denviers, "or else you mistook the +rustling above for someone wandering in the forest glade." The Arab +turned to my companion and then responded:-- + +"Hassan has long been accustomed to distinguish different sounds from a +distance, the one which was heard a minute ago was caused by a human +foot." He pointed to a tangled clump a little to the right of us, as he +continued:-- + +"Listen, sahibs, for the sound of footsteps is surely drawing near. From +yonder thicket the wanderer will doubtless emerge." Presently a sound +fell upon our ears, and a moment afterwards we heard the crackling of +dead twigs as if someone was passing over them. + +"The feet of the one who is approaching us are uncovered," volunteered +our guide, whose keen sense of hearing was vastly superior to our own, +and its accuracy was again proved fully, for, pushing aside the +undergrowth which hindered his path, there stepped out upon the level +track before us a singularly well-formed being, whose whole appearance +was that of a man in his primitive, savage state. He was fully six feet +in height, and wonderfully erect, his nut-brown skin forming a warm +setting for the rich, dark eyes which so distinguish Eastern races. His +black hair clustered thickly above his forehead, on which we observed a +circular spot, crimson in colour, and much resembling the _pottu_ which +Shiva women daily paint above their brows as a religious emblem. As +Hassan had already said, the man's feet were bare of covering, while the +single garment which he wore was a brightly spotted panther skin, which +passed over the left shoulder to the right side, and then hung down +carelessly to the knees. In one hand he carried a stout bow, and the +band which crossed his body over the right shoulder supported a quiver +which hung gracefully behind. A savage, and in such a rude garb, the man +seemed almost grand in his very simplicity. + +[Illustration: "A DHAH!"] + +"A Dhah!" exclaimed Hassan, quietly. "We have, indeed, met with good +fortune." Again we heard the brushwood crackle, and a second man, +resembling the first in appearance and dress, came forward, and together +they held a conversation, interspersed largely with the gestures which +play so prominent a part in the language of barbaric tribes. + +"What can they be searching for?" Denviers asked Hassan, as the men +seemed to be closely examining the trunks of several of the palm trees. + +"I cannot tell, sahib," responded the Arab. Then he continued with a +warning movement:-- + +"Hist! there are others coming, and they are bearing loads with them." +Through the brushwood we next saw several Dhahs advance, each carrying +upon his head a huge bundle of some twining plant belonging to a species +which we had not observed hitherto during our wanderings in Ceylon. From +its appearance we likened it to a giant convolvulus, for, while the +pliant stem was as thick as a man's arm, there hung from it huge leaves +and petals resembling that flower in shape. We moved cautiously into the +undergrowth behind, thus getting a little farther away from the Dhahs, +and, lying with our bodies stretched upon the ground at full length, we +supported our heads upon our hands and narrowly watched the scene before +us. + +Following the commands of the Dhah whom we had first seen, one of the +others deftly threw upwards a long coil of the climbing plant, which, on +reaching a part of the trunk of one of the palm trees some distance +above his head, twined round the stem. The rope-like plant was then +fastened to another palm tree some little distance in front of the +first, and lower down. Continuing this process in all directions we saw +them construct before our astonished eyes a wonderful tent, the leafy +green roof and sides of which glowed with a massy setting of white and +crimson flowers. The front almost faced us, so that the interior of the +tent was disclosed to our view, and then this strange tribe next placed +within the tent a number of rich skins of various animals killed in the +chase, the whole effect being viewed with satisfaction by the Dhahs when +at last their labour was finished. + +"What a curious tent!" Denviers exclaimed. "These Dhahs are indeed a +strange people." + +Just as he spoke a messenger came to them through the brushwood, +whereupon the men who had constructed the tent threw themselves down on +either side of it. Within a few minutes we heard the sound of a number +of footsteps approaching, and then a band of Dhahs stepped out from the +brushwood through which the first had come, and joined those resting by +the tent. Following these, we next saw a number of others, who ranged +themselves before the men in a standing posture, and as they did so we +judged from their attire that they were women. + +Their raven hair was loosely twisted and threaded with pearls, while +pendants of the latter hung from their ears. The garb which covered +their forms was made of similar skins to those which the men wore, but +more elaborately wrought, in addition to being gathered at the waist by +a glittering belt made of the plumage of beautiful birds. Here and there +a dark-eyed and lightly-clad child could be seen standing among the +women. From time to time the glances of the Dhahs were turned in the +direction whence they had entered the forest clearing, and the sound of +their voices then ceased. They were evidently expecting someone, and we, +remembering the strange rumour as to the nationality of their queen, +began to watch the brushwood with considerable interest, being anxious +to see her as soon as she emerged. That some event of unusual moment was +about to take place upon her arrival we felt sure, from the disappointed +looks which overspread the Dhahs' faces each time that their expectation +of her coming was not realized. + +"What do you think is about to happen?" I whispered to Denviers, as we +kept quite still, fearing lest our presence should be discovered. + +"Something strange, no doubt," he responded, "for I notice that the +crimson mark which we saw upon the men's foreheads also adorns those of +the women, and seems to have been recently placed there." Here Hassan +interposed, in his usually clear, grave tone:-- + +"It is very rarely, indeed, sahibs, that the Dhahs have been seen +wandering on the borders of the forest, for they usually keep within the +wild and pathless interior; so, at least, your slave heard in Kandi." + +"Well," I added, "we certainly have much to be thankful for, since there +is every chance of our remaining here unobserved, and witnessing +whatever ceremony is about to take place. The sun has not long set, and +yet the moon is up already. The network of branches above us keeps out +its light to some extent; still we shall be able to see clearly what +transpires." + +"It will be unlucky for us if these Dhahs happen to discover our +whereabouts," said Denviers, "for a shower of arrows shot from their +stout bows towards us would make our present position anything but a +pleasant one." + +"They will not see us, sahib," continued Hassan, "unless we incautiously +make some noise if anything unusual happens. They are not likely to cast +many searching glances into the shadows which the trees cast, for they +are apparently preoccupied, if we may judge from the excitement which +they are evidently trying to suppress. We certainly must remain +perfectly still when the queen appears, for thus only shall we see +without being seen ourselves." + +"That is easy enough to say, Hassan," I replied; "but in such a moment +as that which faces us, we may easily forget to be cautious." + +"Don't you think it would be a good plan if we were to separate a little +from each other?" asked Denviers. Our guide seemed strongly in favour of +this plan, and while I remained in the position which had been occupied +hitherto, Denviers moved a few yards to the right, and Hassan about the +same distance to the left of me. The latter, however, found his new +position would readily expose him to observation, and when he had +communicated this fact to me by signs, I beckoned to him to return to my +side, which he did. Denviers, however, remained where he had gone, and +this circumstance, slight as it was, led a little later on to a most +unexpected result. The silence which just before we had observed among +the Dhahs occurred again, and watching narrowly the brushwood we saw +emerge from it the one whom they were eagerly expecting. As our eyes +rested upon this last comer we were indeed startled, for before us was +the Queen of the Dhahs, and we recognised in that moment that the rumour +concerning her was true! + +[Illustration: PROSTRATING HIMSELF BEFORE HER.] + + +II. + +"She comes! Margarita!" burst from the lips of every assembled Dhah, as +the queen slowly advanced and passed between her subjects, who lined the +path leading to the tent. As she moved amid them they bent low, while +here and there a warrior Dhah pressed with his lips her trailing garment +as she passed. Reaching the tent the queen turned and faced the excited +throng of subjects grouped round it, and then we saw more distinctly her +features and the attire which she wore. + +The age of the queen was apparently less than twenty, her clear, fair +skin forcibly contrasting with the dark complexion of her subjects, whom +she alone resembled in the colour of the soft, full eyes with which she +glanced upon them. A look almost of sadness overshadowed her face, which +all the adulation which she received from her subjects could not +entirely banish. Her form, which was above the medium height, was clad +in a flowing robe of a wonderfully soft and silky-looking material, +woven possibly, we thought, from the inner bark of some tree. Its loose +folds were bare of ornament, save that the queen wore a girdle over it +thickly interwoven with pearls as white as those of Manaar, of which a +profuse number also braided her light flowing hair, meshes of which +partly concealed her forehead. When the queen stood in silence before +her subjects, after the greeting which they had given her subsided, +there issued from among the Dhahs that one whom first we saw in the +forest. Prostrating himself before her he afterwards rose, and, having +bent low his head, began:-- + +"Margarita, white queen of the dusky race whose habitation is the +pathless forest, hail! Here, upon the border which limits thy domains, +we pledge anew to thee the promise of fealty, of which the crimson star +upon our foreheads is the token. By it we swear to thee that thy foes +shall be our foes, and that over us, thy slaves, shalt thou have the +power of life and death." Then, turning to the Dhahs, who throughout +this speech had maintained a death-like silence, he asked:-- + +"Swear ye this by the crimson star of blood which is placed upon your +brows?" + +The last word had scarcely left his lips when the subject Dhahs rose +and, placing upon their foreheads their left hands, held aloft the right +above their heads as they cried:-- + +"By the crimson tide, which rules the life of man, we swear!" + +We watched the strange scene intently as each of the Dhahs, in turn, +came forward and fell prostrate before the queen, then gave place to +those who followed. The Dhah who had administered the oath remained near +the queen until the ceremony was concluded, and seemed to number the +subjects as they came forward. Then he fell before her and, for a second +time, kissed the hem of her robe. Smiling gravely upon him, the queen +extended to him her hand. Pressing his lips fervently upon it he rose, +then, turning to those around, he exclaimed:-- + +"All have not sworn fealty. One among us has not taken the oath, and at +sundown he did not bear upon his forehead the sacred mark!" There was an +ominous frown apparent upon the brows of the Dhahs as these words were +uttered, and when he added: "Ye know the penalty which such +transgression deserves; how then judge ye?" each man's hand gripped his +bow in a threatening manner, while even the faces of the women grew +terribly stern. By one of those assembled was uttered a cry which leapt +from lip to lip, for it was immediately caught up by all:-- + +"Death to the false one! Death when the day shall dawn!" A gleam of +satisfaction, one almost of savage joy, passed over the face of the Dhah +who stood beside the queen as he added:-- + +"The sentence upon the traitor is a just one; do thou then confirm it!" +He turned as if about to seek himself for the one who was the cause of +the tumult, when the momentary silence was strangely broken. Upon our +ears was borne the sharp whizz of an arrow shot true from a +tightly-strung bow; then the Dhah who had just finished speaking, with a +wild cry that pierced the forest, threw his arms up as if grasping the +empty air, and fell dead at the queen's feet! + +[Illustration: "THE DHAH FELL DEAD."] + +"Look yonder, sahib!" whispered Hassan, who was still beside me, "there +is the one who sent forth the deadly shaft!" I turned my gaze hastily in +the direction which the Arab indicated, and saw Denviers struggling with +a fierce Dhah from whose hands he was trying to wrest a bow, and who had +hidden in the brushwood near him without being observed hitherto! They +were seen in a moment by the assembled Dhahs, and, with a wild rush, the +latter poured down upon the combatants, seizing them as they still +grasped the bow. + +"Hassan," I cried to our guide, "come on, we must get Denviers out of +the hands of this horde somehow!" We dashed across the intervening +space, and made a brief but desperate attempt to release our companion. +It was as useless as it was rash, for we were directly afterwards +dragged, in spite of our struggles--as well as Denviers and his +opponent--into the open glade, close to the dead body of the man lying +there. + +"We are betrayed!" cried one of the Dhahs. "The white spies have been +led hither by the traitor among us that they may learn our strength, and +then return with a force to destroy us! One of our number has already +fallen; shall we not slay the captives over his dead body?" A fierce cry +of assent rose from the others, as they fitted each a shaft to their +bows and took deliberate aim at us as we were held fast by our captors. +I saw the face of the queen grow pale as she rested her eyes, first upon +the fallen Dhah and then upon us. Had men of her own race come that they +might destroy the tribe which obeyed her slightest word? She made an +imperative gesture, which caused the Dhahs to hold their arrows +undischarged, though they still kept their bows bent, waiting eagerly +for her to utter the word of command to slay us. + +"Stop!" she cried, in a commanding tone. "Upon your foreheads ye wear +still the pledge of obedience to me, with whom rests alone the power of +life and death. Ye shall have justice to the full: I will hear what they +can say in their defence, but if wantonly they have caused life to be +taken, white though they be, I swear unto ye that they shall surely +die." The Dhahs shifted their arrows from the bowstrings and seemed +reluctant to give us even this short respite. I looked into the queen's +face and read there that her threat against us was no idle one. She +commanded the women and most of the men to retire--leaving us still held +fast by our captors. + +"We are not cowards," said Denviers, calmly, to her. "Hear what we have +to say, and then decide our fate. Bid these savages release us from +their grasp--we shall make no attempt to escape, I pledge my word." The +queen glanced coldly at him as she responded: + +"Be it as ye say." Then, turning to the Dhahs, she continued: "Take them +within the tent, and then retire. Remain within an arrow shot from here, +and if ye see one of the prisoners attempt to escape, slay him and spare +not." We were conducted into the queen's tent, and there released. As +the Dhahs withdrew Denviers turned to Hassan, and said:-- + +"Bid this savage who shot the arrow explain that we know nothing of +him." The queen looked sharply at us, and then pointing to Hassan, +asked:-- + +"Who is this whom ye have brought into the forest?" + +I answered for us, saying: "He is our guide, with whom we have been +wandering for some time. Why do you mistrust us, since you have ample +proof that the fallen Dhah was shot by your own subject there?" and I +pointed to the man, who, for a moment, had thrown himself down in the +tent. + +"Speak!" she commanded him. "Why did you shoot forth the winged +messenger of death?" + +To our surprise the man rose and confronted her boldly, as he +answered:-- + +"Am I not a warrior? Can I not bend the bow and endure hardships better +than anyone among the tribe over which thou rulest? Was not I prince of +these Dhahs until the day when thou tookest possession of my right? Thou +hast despised me and looked kindly upon another, wherefore have I sworn +to refuse to take the pledge of fealty to thee when the time came round, +and to stretch him dead at thy feet. Deliver me into the hands of the +tribe if thou wilt, but thou art powerless to bring back life to thy +favourite!" He stopped and drew himself up defiantly before her. The +eyes of the imperious queen shone brightly with the fierce resentment +which the Dhah's words roused in her. + +"Darest thou then to confront thy queen so?" she asked, scornfully. "May +not I choose whom I will upon whom to bestow my favours? Coward that +thou art to shoot the shaft secretly, because thou darest not face thine +enemy as a brave Dhah ever does! Thy crime has nearly cost these other +prisoners dear; and I, ruling as I do this tribe without the +exterminating feuds which distinguished it under thy misgovernment, doom +thee to death. At sundown to-morrow shalt thou die; till then thou shall +live, scorned by the race upon which thou hast brought this stain." She +moved to the front of the tent, and then we saw the Dhah dragged away by +those whom the queen quickly summoned. + +We were bidden to rest ourselves upon the piles of soft, rich skins +which were spread there, and having promised to secure our safety, the +queen, whose anger gradually subsided, observing the inquiring glances +which we turned towards her, said, in a low tone:-- + +"The deed which ye have seen enacted to-night has smitten me sorely. For +ten years have I lived among these Dhahs, for to-day is the anniversary +of that upon which I came to them, and so it is that ye chance to see +their promise to obey me renewed. To-morrow it is expected that I, too, +will take in turn the oath, by which yearly I have sworn to them to +remain in this forest until the seasons change and change again. At +midnight to-night my last promise expires, and for a few brief hours I +shall not be their bond queen. By your glances I judge that ye would +learn my history. Strange as it is, I must narrate it briefly, for, +because of the death which ye have witnessed, I now have a request to +make which may sound unusual upon your ears." + +[Illustration: "TO-MORROW SHALT THOU DIE!"] + + +III. + +The dark eyes of the queen glanced at us as she began her story, the +sequel to which we did not at all anticipate:-- + +"I was a mere child when it chanced that I strayed from the hut which my +English parents inhabited on the borders of this forest. Of them I know +nothing. I remember the cry of surprise which came from the lips of a +Dhah woman when she found me, and then carried me among her tribeswomen +to show to them. It is forbidden among us for a Dhah to ever pass beyond +the limits of this forest, and so it transpired that, knowing nothing of +other races, they were astonished at my strange whiteness. I have heard +that at first they contemplated my death, thinking that my presence +would bring dire misfortune upon them. The woman who found me averred, +on the contrary, that my appearance betokened great advantages to the +tribe, as I was sent to dwell in the forest as a goddess. Afterwards, +believing this, they paid me the most abject worship for years. When I +grew older I longed to escape, but they were determined that I should +not do so, and compelled me to take an oath to stay with them for a +year, which I have renewed as often as the promise expired. Finding that +I disliked the adoration which they paid to me, they deposed their +prince--he whose hand shot the fatal arrow, as, alas! ye saw--and +although for a time I refused to accept the position, I was eventually +made their queen--even as I am now. + +"Many times I desired to leave them, but of late that wish has grown +feeble, for he, whom ye know now lies lifeless before the tent, bent his +dark eyes, and looked into mine, which returned his glances. One day I +thought to raise him even as a prince to my side, for all the tribe +trusted in him as much as they disliked the one deposed. Now that he is +slain, the wish to depart has again re-entered my breast, and ye, who +are of the same kindred as I, surely ye will aid me? How came ye hither, +on foot or otherwise?" + +"We left our horses on the edge of the forest," said Denviers, "but we +did not expect to be so long absent from them. How wilt thou depart from +these Dhahs? Surely they will avenge themselves upon us, for they will +assuredly think that we have influenced you to desert them." The queen +paused for a minute, then answered:-- + +"I could not bear to leave them openly, for I have grown to be almost +one of themselves, and they are dear indeed to me. I will accompany ye +to where your horses are tethered; and waiting there for me I will come +to ye again upon the steed which has never known saddle." + +The plan of escape seemed simple enough, but the slightest mishap might +bring us into conflict with the whole tribe of the Dhahs, who would +doubtless be infuriated if they thought that their queen was lost to +them through us, as Denviers had suggested. It seemed to us a strange +termination to our adventure, but in obedience to a gesture from the +queen we rose, and, accompanied by her, passed the guards in safety. As +she emerged from the tent, the queen bade us wait for her for a minute, +and stopping, we saw the woman bend down sadly over the silent form +lying there under the trees, which half shut out the midnight sky. Her +hand touched the arrow and gently drew it forth--tipped with blood! Then +placing it within the upper folds of her dress she passed silently on +through the clearing, and so accompanied us to the spot where our horses +were, whence she departed. + +[Illustration: "HER HAND TOUCHED THE ARROW."] + +"I am afraid that this affair may yet turn out badly for us," I remarked +to Denviers, as we untethered our steeds and waited for the queen's +return. "Where shall we make for when we start?" + +"For the hut of the Cingalese, which we left some time ago," he +responded. "It will afford her some shelter, and we can keep watch +outside." + +He had scarcely finished speaking when we saw the queen riding towards +us upon a snow-white steed. As the moonlight touched her spotless robe +and her floating hair, with the pearls which adorned it, she seemed to +us to be more like some vision than a living reality. I had just time to +notice that she now carried the weapon of the tribe over which she had +so long ruled--a bow--and that across her fair shoulders was slung a +quiver of arrows, when a sudden cry rose from the forest, and at the +same moment Hassan exclaimed:-- + +"Quick, sahibs! The Dhahs are upon us!" + +We leapt upon our horses and dashed away from the forest just as a heavy +shower of arrows narrowly missed us. Hassan went on in front, while +Denviers and I galloped on either side of the queen. Glancing back at +the Dhahs I observed that they were massed already upon the margin of +the forest, the flight of their queen having become rapidly known. The +women raised a mournful and appealing cry of entreaty to her to go back +to them, and, glancing at the queen, I saw that her face was wet with +tears. We heard the hoarse shouts of the warrior Dhahs when they found +that their arrows fell short, but they did not dare to pass the limits +of the forest beyond which their strange law forbade them to go. We rode +on for some hours at a rapid rate, then, on nearing the hut of the +Cingalese, Denviers leapt down and succeeded in awaking its sole +occupant, who was induced to vacate it. The queen dismounted and entered +the hut wearied, as we thought, with the long ride, for the dawn had +come before we finished our journey. Hassan secured the horses, and soon +after we were all lying at a little distance from the hut fast asleep in +the shade of some giant ferns. + +The morning was far advanced when we awoke, but hour after hour passed +and the door of the hut remained closed. Becoming uneasy, at last I +ventured to open it. The queen had disappeared! + +"Denviers!" I shouted. "Come here a minute!" My companion hastened +towards the hut, and was considerably surprised to find it empty. +Glancing round it we saw against one of its thin palm leaf sides an +arrow projecting. Going close to it we found roughly scratched beneath +it a message to us, which said simply:-- + +"_The Queen of the Dhahs could not rest away from her people and the +forest where lies her dead lover!_" We stared at the writing +incredulously for a minute or two, then a sudden thought occurred to +me:-- + +"Hassan!" I shouted, "see to the horses." The Arab went slowly to the +spot where he had secured them, but hastily returned saying, in an +animated tone, somewhat unusual for him unless when excited:-- + +"Sahibs, the white steed is no longer there!" and he looked gravely at +us as he spoke. + +"Well," said Denviers, as Hassan finished speaking, "this has been a +strange adventure from beginning to end. How could such a woman care to +spend her existence with those Dhahs? It seemed curious to me at the +first, but after seeing her and observing the contrast between her and +her subjects, I am still more surprised." + +"The Dhahs are known throughout Ceylon," interposed Hassan, "for the +honour which they pay to their queen, and that may influence her to +remain with them; besides, they are a handsome race, very different to +such as this man," and he pointed to the Cingalese, who was again +vacantly staring at his plantation of palm trees. + +"What do you think will become of the man who shot the Dhah, sahib?" +asked Hassan, as he turned to Denviers. My companion was silent for a +moment, then responded:-- + +"I really cannot say. He is doomed to die at sundown to-day, but I +daresay someone will intercede for him with the queen." Then, holding +out towards the Arab the arrow which we had found within the hut, he +continued:-- + +"Take care of that, Hassan, for if we are able I should like to keep it +as a memento of this event." The Arab examined it closely to see what +constituted its value, and Denviers, thinking that it might disappear +like sundry other lost treasures of ours, added: "It is a poisoned +arrow, and if put in that sash of yours might prove very dangerous." +Hassan understood the hint, as subsequent events proved, and, calling +upon Mahomet as a witness to his integrity under such trying +circumstances, carried it cautiously away and placed it among our +baggage. + + + + +_Illustrated Interviews._ + +XIX.--THE LORD BISHOP OF RIPON. + +[Illustration: THE LORD BISHOP OF RIPON. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + + +It was a long, cold journey to Ripon. When I reached the Palace the time +of five o'clock tea had long since passed--it only wanted half an hour +to the first dinner bell. But a cup of deliciously warming tea was ready +for me. This kindly thoughtfulness seemed to break down every barrier +calculated to make one feel anything but perfectly "at home." Then, when +the Bishop returned from a long day's work, the impressions gathered +over the refreshing cup with his wife became a reality. It may at once +be said that there is very little difference between him who preaches +from the pulpit and him who sits down and talks with you in his own +house. + +The Bishop of Ripon is acknowledged to be one of the most eloquent +preachers of the day. He is as gentle in his manner as he is convincing +in his utterances. He is utterly free from anything suggestive of an +over-estimated "I." He seems always to speak from his heart, and +continually with the single thought of never giving a hurtful word. In +truth, he is as impressive in the home as in the cathedral. Yet, when he +is at home, there are his children, young and old. He is heart and soul +with them in their play. Little Beatrice--whose pet name is Daisy--and +five-year-old Douglas--familiarly known as Chappie--already know that +there are merry games to be enjoyed in which their father watches over +both. + +We spent the evening after dinner in going through the house. The +Palace, Ripon, is a semi-modern building, having been built some fifty +years ago. The first stone was laid on Monday, 1st October, 1838, by +Bishop Longley, and its correct entire cost was L14,059 1s. 8d. Its +rooms are large and handsome. The entrance-hall abounds in flowers and +ferns, and contains at least two valuable canvases. One is a life-size +picture by Grant of Archbishop Longley--the first Bishop--the other, by +Watts, is that of Bishop Bickersteth, the second Bishop. Both of these +are heirlooms of the See of Ripon. Just beyond is a second hall, where +is the great oak staircase leading to the rooms above. This corner is +rich in etchings and engravings. Paul Sandby, R.A., is well represented +with his "Windsor"; works by Aumonier, Fred Slocombe, Charles Murray, +David Law, Joseph Knight, Meissonier, and a striking etching of +Napoleon, by Ruet, are noticeable. There are many quaint old views of +"Ripon Minster," a Soudanese sword which one of the Bishop's sons +brought from Egypt, whilst on a table is a very clever model of the +Bishop's father's church at Liverpool. It was made by an invalid lady, +and her ingenious fingers have handled the cardboard and gum most +artistically. + +[Illustration: THE ENTRANCE HALL. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +Immediately opposite to the hall is the Holden Library. A picture of the +Rev. J. Holden, who not only founded it, but left a small endowment to +keep it in good order, hangs over the fireplace. Here the clergy of the +diocese may come and consult the volumes. It is a fine room, and its +outlook upon the rising ground of the garden is pleasantness itself. + +[Illustration: THE INNER HALL. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +We were just leaving the library when a soft pit-pat, pit-pat at our +heels caused me to turn. The quiet, disturbing footfalls were made by a +beautiful blue Angora cat, which was accompanied by George, the pug, who +had made his presence known at the dinner table. Both Sultan, the cat, +and George proved to be the most interesting of animals imaginable. +Sultan's kittens are sold for charitable purposes and a little litter +realized L10 for the Wakefield Bishopric Fund. George used to worry the +sheep--he was the death of seven. He saw a St. Bernard causing trouble +amongst the universal providers of lamb and mutton, and he could not +resist the temptation to imitate his bigger brother. But he has long +since been forgiven. + +[Illustration: THE HOLDEN LIBRARY. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +"Sultan and George," said the Bishop, "were the greatest of rivals when +they first came here--now they are the best of friends. One bitter cold +night George set up a terrible barking. I left my room, went +downstairs--nothing apparently the matter. But George would not let me +go. He barked and ran to the door. Then I heard a low, piteous cry. I +opened the door, and in walked Sultan from the snow-covered step, +perished with cold!" + +I gave George a pat on the head--I fancy he knew what we had been +talking about. Away he cantered with Sultan, and we went into the +drawing-room. There are two such apartments at the Palace, each leading +into the other. Both look out upon the grounds, the trees in which now +bear the golden-tinted reminders of autumn upon their branches, and the +grass is plentifully strewn with the chestnuts blown down by the wind. +The smaller of the two rooms abounds with dainty water-colours--light, +bright and tiny paintings of sea-side views and flowers--numberless +portraits, and photographic reminiscences of travel. The curiosity, +however, of this apartment is a replica of the bust of Dante at Naples. +The Bishop of Ripon is a very earnest and enthusiastic student of the +great philosophical poet. Pictures of Dante, indeed, abound throughout +the house, and in the study--to be visited later--are to be found many +rare and valuable editions of him who conceived the never-to-be-excelled +"Inferno," including Lord Vernon's, the Landino editions of 1481, and +the Nidobeato of 1478. + +[Illustration: "GEORGE" AND "SULTAN." + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +The large drawing-room affords a distant and picturesque view of the +great square tower of the cathedral. The Palace is really on a level +with it, so great is the rise in the ground. This apartment, like all +the rooms indeed, is richly perfumed by flowers; exquisite china and +silver nick-nacks are everywhere, and the Bishop evidently does not +believe in the untold troubles associated with the presence of peacocks' +feathers. There are several fans made from the "unlucky" stalks. One +table seems given up to the congregating of tiny china animals--the most +diminutive of pigs, kangaroos, rabbits, dogs, and ducks. The pictures +are mostly marine subjects: two fine dockyard scenes are by Charles +Dixon. Dixon--whose father, it will be remembered, painted "The Pride +of Battery B"--was only sixteen when he painted them. A grand skin from +a St. Bernard has its story to tell. The Bishop had two such dogs. His +lordship changed his coachman and groom. Together with his family the +Bishop left the Palace for a time, and the dog pined away. His skin now +lies by the window. Alas! his more callous wife is still alive in the +stable. Two of its offspring are in the safe keeping of a well-known +clergyman, who, being in doubt as to what name he should bestow upon his +newly-purchased pups, out of gratitude for the invigorating influence of +the Harrogate waters determined to call them Sulphur and Magnesia! + +The dining-room need be of goodly size--frequently some thirty or forty +people sit down at its tables. There are many fine oil-paintings here. +Two bear the initials "A. S." "A. S." was Arthur Stocks. When the Bishop +of Ripon was vicar of St. James's, Holloway, Arthur Stocks was a +superintendent in the Sunday school. He used to travel backwards and +forwards twice every Sabbath to the school, and when he died he left a +wish that his quondam vicar should have one of his works. It has the +best place in the room, though there are several valuable works of the +Titian School, and a striking canvas, believed to be a Mazzoni, which +was picked up in a general shop in a western town. + +[Illustration: THE DRAWING-ROOM. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +A long corridor runs level with the dining-room outside. Its walls are +lined with pictures and photographs, all reviving pleasant memories. A +dual picture of Mr. and Mrs. H. M. Stanley is autographed by nearly all +who signed the register on the occasion of their marriage--such names as +W. E. Gladstone, Sir Frederick Leighton, and the Baroness +Burdett-Coutts. It was the Bishop of Ripon who officiated at the +ceremony--probably the first and only Bishop who has conducted a wedding +service the whole of which was "received" into phonographs placed in the +Abbey. There are excellent portraits of Gerald Wellesley, Dean of +Windsor; whilst Archbishop Longley--who surely occupied more +ecclesiastical Sees than any previous prelate--has signed himself as +Ripon, Durham, York, and Canterbury to a striking portrait of himself. +Henry Irving is not forgotten; but perhaps the most striking sketch is +that of General Gordon--just by the side of a map of Khartoum. The +inscription reads: "General C. E. Gordon, from an hour's sketch I made +of him on 21st December, 1882.--Ed. Clifford." Mr. Clifford was the only +English artist the Hero of Khartoum ever sat to. Above the frame is a +_fac-simile_ of his last message: "I am quite happy, thank God; and, +like Lawrence, I have _tried_ to do my duty." + +A photographic group of his lordship's working men's committee hangs +near--their willing and kindly work is much valued. The Bishop is a +purely practical prelate. This working men's committee has been formed +with the aid of the clergy in Leeds. Leeds has some fifty parishes, and +five working men are chosen out of each--giving a body of 250 strong. +They help chiefly at special services such as those held on Good +Fridays. + +As we were discussing the peculiar advantages of soliciting the services +of the working man to meet his brother workman, the distant sound of +the chapel organ was heard. Its echo came very sweetly through the +corridor. It was the time of evening service. The dim glow from the +lamps lent an air of solemnity to the little chapel, and when the +service was over we remained behind for a few moments. I could just +distinguish the altar steps of white, black and red--the Dante +combination of colours--and the peaceful light from the moon streamed +through the stained glass windows on to the oaken stalls, showing +faintly the outlines of apostles and saints. One of these was put up in +1852, in remembrance of the Rev. Charles Dodgson, examining chaplain to +Bishop Longley and the father of the author of "Alice in Wonderland." It +was here in the morning that I witnessed the gathering together of +twenty or thirty clerics, who were licensed to new curacies and livings. +We left the chapel, and ascending the great oaken staircase entered the +study. This is essentially a room for work. The book-shelves contain +some thousands of volumes--the only photo about the place is that of a +family group. In one corner of the room stands a tin box, in which are +three volumes of autographs, and the pages of these valuable volumes may +be gone through, and the autographs of nearly all the Archbishops and +Bishops of England for the last 200 years may be seen, including Juxon, +Bishop of London, who attended Charles I. on the scaffold. A book +containing photographs of the churches in the diocese reveals that +Bishop Longley--the first Bishop of Ripon--was of a distinctly practical +character. He started this ingenious index to the state of his churches. +As soon as any alteration is made in a place of worship it is +photographed. This shows the Bishop at a glance exactly how his churches +are progressing from an architectural point of view. + +[Illustration: THE DRAWING-ROOM. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +The Bishop sat down, and it was whilst listening to much of the deepest +interest regarding his work that I noticed the Prelate more closely. He +is a trifle below the medium height, slightly whiskered, with iron-grey +hair curled all about his head and brow. His face is intensely kind, and +his every word and action suggestive of true and unaffected humility. +Indeed, it is this very humility that has prevented his work becoming +wider known. He is remarkably simple in his dress. Bishops, we know, +have opportunity of seeing the sad, and indeed the seamy side of +clerical life. If a man is a Bishop, he can still remain a brother. The +putting on of the lawn lessens not his love for, and interest in, the +young curate who only wears the linen surplice. He lives a quiet, +homely, simple life, though always hospitable to others. How could he do +otherwise, when he hears of cases like that of the poor cleric with a +wife and eight children, who, after preaching his Sunday sermon, returns +home to a meal of oatmeal gruel, and that meal would have been wanting +had not a kindly farmer given it to his shepherd? + +The Bishop of Ripon has a diocese extending over a million acres and +numbering a million people. Between seventy and a hundred changes take +place every year. He travels much. He estimates he covers between 10,000 +and 12,000 miles every year. + +We spoke about preaching. On this subject the Bishop believes that each +man must use the method best suited to himself. There have been +effective preachers both of written and extempore sermons. The question +of memory came up, and the Bishop said: "I learnt something of this +from the biography of Chancellor Bird, of Lincoln, who said, 'The memory +is very sensitive of distrust; if you trust it, it seldom fails you.' I +have tested this more than once. On one occasion I was preaching at St. +Paul's. When I got into the pulpit I thought I could not remember the +number of the verse of my text. I knew the chapter, and opened my Bible +there, but could not see it. People began to move about, but I hazarded +a guess, and fortunately it was right." + +I learnt yet another example of this whilst in Ripon, though not from +the Bishop. He was preaching at Bradford one Sunday morning two years +ago. One of his many dramatic movements knocked his book from the pulpit +cushion. It was just in the middle of the sermon. He never so much as +glanced at the fallen volume, and my informant said he had never heard +the Bishop more eloquent. + +"You ask me if I advocate the preaching of other men's sermons," said +his lordship, repeating my question. "There is one thing about it. It +behoves every man to advocate the simplest honesty. If any cleric +exchange his sermon with another, let him say from the pulpit, 'I'm +going to give you So-and-so's sermon to-day.'" + +We talked on, being joined by Mr. Harry Carpenter--the Bishop's eldest +son--who frankly declared himself to be a happy, recently-called +barrister, and just now lecturing for the University extension movement. +We said "Good-night." + +When I reached my room I sat down by the fire and remembered that the +Bishop was fond of his joke. He has a name--William Boyd Carpenter--the +latter of which is capable of a very merry conversion. The story is told +how, before being appointed to the See of Ripon, he once married a young +couple with the assurance that he was not only a Carpenter but a Joiner. +Only a few months ago he was about to lay the foundation stone of a new +vicarage. The architect handed him the trowel, etc., inviting him to +become "an operative mason for a few moments." + +[Illustration: THE DINING-ROOM. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +"I would rather remain a working Carpenter," was the witty reply. + +I stirred my fire, and amongst the flickering embers I could almost see +the faces of a happy pair at Christ Church, Lancaster Gate. The Bishop +was officiating. The charming though nervous bride experienced some +difficulty in taking off her glove at the right moment to receive the +wedding ring. + +And a very soft whisper of kindly assurance came from the clergyman's +lips. + +"Don't be flurried," he said, _sotto voce_; "there's plenty of time, and +they are bound to wait for us!" + +When I awoke in the morning I looked from my window. It was very early, +and the sun was lighting up the tower of Ripon Cathedral as it rose +above the tree tops. It was a fair scene. You could count a dozen +rabbits hopping about on the grassy lawn leading down to the tennis +court, and sitting nervously for a few moments, and glancing anxiously +this way, that way, and every way in expectancy of a disturbing +footstep. And as I looked out upon the beautiful scene of autumn-tinted +trees and grassy mounds, with just a last rose of summer here and there, +I could almost distinguish those little Arabs from the by-streets and +slums of Leeds. They were running about in tatters, shouting themselves +hoarse with delight, and turning unlimited catharine-wheels in their +happy delirium. I could hear them distinctly clapping their hands; I +could not hear the patter of their feet, though--the poor little fellows +were bootless. Then they ceased their play for a moment. Somebody was +beckoning to them to follow him. He quietly led them beneath the +branches of the very biggest tree in the garden. He pointed his finger +upwards. It was a very short sermon--a sermon from a text set up by +Nature which the tiniest mite amongst this tattered congregation could +understand. + +[Illustration: THE CORRIDOR. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +"Little children," he said, "I want you to grow up like this tree--with +nothing between you and Heaven, nothing save the branches which you must +shoot out--branches of help to others." + +And the children went to play again. + +Then I spied from my window a fine piece of level ground. The railway +men were playing cricket there. How they seemed to enjoy the huge +plum-puddings after throwing down their bats and leaving the wickets! +The toothsome puddings had been contributed by the ladies of the city, +and made hot and steaming in the great copper of the Palace kitchen. + +After breakfast, the Bishop and I went for a long walk around the +grounds--there are sixty or seventy acres of land here, and a small home +farm. The Palace--which I now saw properly for the first time--is built +of stone, the monotony of which is relieved by many a climbing +nasturtium and cluster of ivy leaves. The chapel stands at right angles +to the house. It was added later, and is the gift of the late Archbishop +Vernon Harcourt to the See of Ripon. + +There is rather a curious thing about some of the decorative work on the +exterior of the Palace. An episcopal diary started by Bishop Longley, +and preserved at the Palace, mentions that amongst many carved "heads" +on the chapel was that of a Bishop. A strong gust of wind blew it down: +all the others, which were decidedly unclerical, remained! But the most +amusing entry in this book refers to two figures of angels at the +south-east and south-west corners. Seeing that the Queen and Prince +Consort had only been married a few months when the Palace was built, +instructions were given to imitate in the carving of the angels the +features of Her Majesty and her Consort. But the stone-mason, being +possessed of a certain prosaic mind, was not content with the attempt to +give the features of the Prince, but represented him as an angel arrayed +in a field-marshal's uniform and wearing the ribbon of the Garter! Of +course it was altered at once. + +We had walked on and stood still for a moment at the end of a long +avenue carpeted with fallen leaves. + +"Now you can see Norton Conyers! It is about four miles from here," said +the Bishop. "Charlotte Bronte once had a holiday engagement as governess +there, and a room is still shown where it is said the mad woman was +confined whose story the gifted authoress told in the pages of 'Jane +Eyre.'" + +Then as we wended our way across to the farm, down paths lined with +hedgerows, and through many wicket gates, we paused at times as the +Bishop looked back upon his quiet though useful life. + +The Right Rev. William Boyd Carpenter was born at Liverpool on March +26th, 1841. His father was vicar of St. Michael's there for twenty-seven +years. His first schooling was obtained under Dr. Dawson Turner, at the +Royal Institution School, and amongst famous boys of the Royal +Institution were Bishop Lightfoot, Canon Duckworth, Professor Warr, and +Mr. Crosse. + +"Dr. Dawson Turner," said the Bishop, "was a sort of cosmopolitan--he +tried to teach a little of everything. He was a good-hearted man. He +loved to give threepenny-pieces to the boys who pleased him. I well +remember one day during prayers--we were all assembled in the big +hall--and the head master was reading them. Suddenly the door opened and +a big boy, very nervous and conscience-stricken, who thought he ought to +be at prayers, crept quietly in. Dr. Turner looked up and said, in the +same tone as he was reading, 'Go out--go out! Somebody put that idiot +out!' Then he went on with his reading exactly in the same voice. + +"The man I learned most from was Albert Glyn, our mathematical +master--one of the best teachers that ever breathed. He would never let +you pass a thing unless you thoroughly understood it. It was he who made +mathematics an interesting and fascinating study to me." + +We spoke of the time when the Crimean war broke out, when the Bishop was +full of the boyish ardour of thirteen years of age. His schoolmaster +would not give him a holiday to see the troops going off, but his father +did. It was a sight to be remembered when the troops embarked during the +war. The news was watched for eagerly, and talked over nightly. The +Bishop's family, like so many others, had relatives in the war. Captain +John Boyd, the Bishop's uncle, who was in command of the _Royal George_, +planted the only shot in Cronstadt. Later he lost his life in attempting +to rescue the crew of a small brig off Kingstown harbour. His monument +is in St. Patrick's Cathedral, Dublin. + +At this point of our conversation the Bishop alluded to a well-known +story and epigram. + +The story on which the epigram is founded is of two Irishmen, one of +whom challenged the other to a duel. But when the eventful hour arrived +one sat down and wrote that, were it only his honour at stake he would +meet his opponent, but his wife depended on him, so he begged to +decline. The other individual sent a message to say that if honour were +the only consideration he would come, but he had a daughter and +therefore prayed to be excused. So the epigram read:-- + + Two brave sons of Erin, intent upon slaughter, + Improved on the Hebrew's command: + One honoured his wife and the other his daughter, + That their days might be long in the land. + +"This clever epigram," said the Bishop, "is popularly said to have been +written by Flood, but I have always understood that it was written by my +mother's mother." + +[Illustration: GENERAL GORDON. + +_From a Drawing by E. Clifford._] + +That the Bishop's pen is occasionally employed in throwing off these +epigrams is shown by the following. It will be remembered that at the +time of the great storm at Samoa, Captain Kane, with a pluck and +judgment which evoked the applause of the American and German crews in +the harbour, took his vessel out to sea and so saved her. When questions +were asked in Parliament as to what honour would be conferred on Captain +Kane in recognition of his services, the First Lord of the Admiralty +replied "that Kane had only done his duty, and if he had lost his ship +he would have been court-martialled." So the Bishop wrote:-- + + What shall be done for Kane? + Who brought his vessel safe through wave + With skilful hand and heart as brave: + What shall be done for Kane? + + What shall he have? "We solve the knot," + Cries the First Lord, impartial; + "If Kane had failed, he would have got + Our pickle rod--court-martial." + + Then talk no more of praise or gain, + Our English principle is plain: + When storm winds rise to hurricane, + If Kane escape he 'scapes the cane! + +[Illustration: THE PRIVATE CHAPEL. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +Here is another example:-- + +With regard to the recent conference at Grindelwald, which the Bishop +had hoped to attend, it would not, it appears, have been his first +visit, for at the request of the Bishop of London he acted as his deputy +in opening the new English church destroyed in the recent fire. This +church was built by the brothers Boss, who with their family, to the +number of seven, keep the adjacent hotel, called "The Bear." The +following lines were written by the Bishop in their visitors' book:-- + + A sign upon the earth, behold! + Competes with one in heaven, + The Bear above, the "Bear" below, + The stars that form them, seven. + But when these signs compared are, + Judge then the heavenly losses; + For all declare the earthly stars + Most surely are the Bosses! + +[Illustration: THE STUDY. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +He won an open scholarship at St. Catharine's College, Cambridge, and +remained there until he took his degree in 1864. The late +Attorney-General was the representative of Cambridge in sports in those +days. The late Mr. Parnell was at Cambridge at the same time, and Lord +Carrington and Mr. F. C. Burnand were among the most important members +of the Cambridge A.D.C., as it was called. The acting in those days was +of a very high order. The Bishop was cox. of his college boat; not a +very enviable position--"you've got all the responsibility and none of +the kudos." A cox. is like a bishop: he can only guide, he cannot give +strength. + +[Illustration: THE CHOIR, RIPON CATHEDRAL. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +His lordship referred to the great improvement in University life to-day +compared with thirty years ago. Much less wine is consumed now, and a +man can go through the 'Varsity as a teetotaler without any +inconvenience. At college the young man began a practical training for +the ministry--giving lectures attending district meetings, and teaching +in the Sunday school. + +The Bishop's first curacy was at Maidstone, and, strangely enough, he +was ordained by Bishop Longley. My visit to the Palace was in the full +tide of the cholera scare, and the Bishop referred to his experiences of +it at Maidstone. + +[Illustration: RIPON CATHEDRAL. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +"I was working there," he said, "when the cholera broke out in 1866. My +vicar was away. I assisted a little, more especially at a rookery called +Pad's Hole, then a den of thieves--now a low-lying little spot. I well +remember the first case I visited. It was a poor fellow who was a very +regular attendant at church. I went in at half-past ten to see him. I +went again at half-past one. As I walked up the hill a woman met me and +cried, 'He's gone!' He had been carried off in four hours. The truth is +the people were taken by surprise, and few precautions were taken--there +was no organized system of nurses then. The women who were sent to +attend the cholera-stricken people knew nothing about nursing. They +drank the brandy intended for the relief of the sufferers. I went into +one house to see a woman. The nurse was intoxicated. Shortly after the +poor woman died. At the graveside stood the nurse, still suffering from +the effects of drink. + +"Whenever I walk along here I feel indebted to Longley for one great +thing," continued the Bishop. "You see these trees?" pointing to a +magnificent belt of trees immediately in front of us. "They keep away +the cutting Yorkshire winds. Longley planted these." Some idea of the +power of the winds may be gathered from a note in Bishop Longley's diary +already referred to. It was on the nights of the 6th and 7th of January, +1839, and all the north of England was affected by the storm. The Earl +of Lonsdale lost 70,000 trees in his young plantation, and the +magnificent avenue at Castle Howard was almost destroyed. The whole of +the kitchen garden wall was blown down at the Palace. Bishop Longley +very wisely put up that grand screen of trees. + +His lordship entertains grateful recollections of his days at Maidstone +under his vicar, the Rev. David Dale Stewart. He remained there two +years, afterwards holding curacies at Clapham, and Lee in Kent. From Lee +he went to St. James's, Holloway, to assist the Rev. W. B. Mackenzie. + +"Mr. Mackenzie," said the Bishop, "was a remarkable man; his power in +church and pulpit was singularly great. He only had one curacy and one +incumbency. I succeeded him as vicar, remaining there from 1870 to 1880. +There was no choir there--the congregation was the choir. Here, in +Yorkshire, choirs are invaluable. The people enjoy it--they will have a +choir." + +I asked the Bishop if he thought well of the introduction of orchestras +into our churches. His reply was thoroughly frank and real. + +"In the old days," he said, "men used to play in the churches, and never +expected to be paid. The condition of life since then has very much +changed. If every man will bring his instrument to church as a personal +act of homage to the glory of his Maker, by all means let us have it. We +are in danger of forgetting that if our acts are not the personal homage +of our hearts, such are not acceptable service. I am a little afraid +that we are just now passing through such days of activity as will +possibly cause us to forget the reality of things. We want, as Lord +Mount-Temple said, the Deep Church as well as the High and Low. Yes, let +us have orchestras in churches if you will, but I don't want the man to +go into a place of worship with his fiddle-case under his arm and the +idea in his mind that he is going to take part in a mere performance!" + +[Illustration: RIPON CATHEDRAL. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +At Holloway he founded many excellent institutions--classes for French, +German, shorthand, etc. The young men had their House of Commons, with +their vicar as Speaker. Many of the "M.P.'s" who belonged to the +Highbury Parliament have since turned out admirable speakers and useful +citizens. + +After leaving St. James's, the Bishop became vicar of Christ Church, +Lancaster Gate. He was Select Preacher at Cambridge in 1875 and 1877; +Hulsean Lecturer at Cambridge, 1878; Honorary Chaplain to the Queen, +1878; Select Preacher at Oxford in 1882, when he was also appointed to a +vacant Canonry at Windsor; Bampton Lecturer, 1887, and in 1889 he +received an honorary D.C.L. from the University of Oxford. + +[Illustration: THE PALACE, RIPON. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + +On the death of the late Dr. Bickersteth, in 1884, he was consecrated +Bishop of Ripon. His duties at the House of Lords consist of a fortnight +or three weeks in each year, for the purpose of reading prayers. This +duty, which once devolved entirely upon the junior Bishop, is now +undertaken in turns, with the exception of the seniors in rank. + +It was market-day when we took our way through the streets and great +square which forms the market-place of the more than a thousand-year-old +city. It still keeps up the old-fashioned custom of the blowing of a +horn at morning and night near the Mayor's house. + +On the north side of the Cathedral stands the Deanery. The Dean of +Ripon, who is eighty-four, was cox. in the Oxford crew of the first +'Varsity race, and he acted as page at the coronation of William IV. His +picturesque and venerable figure is one of the best known in Ripon. Dean +Fremantle has made Ripon his home in the truest sense, ever since his +appointment to the Deanery, now sixteen years ago. He has thrown himself +with vigour and devotion into every good work in the city and +neighbourhood. In the Millenary year he presented a magnificent +silver-mounted horn to the Mayor and Corporation, as guardians of the +city. More recently he presented a pleasant bathing shed and offices to +the neighbourhood. He believes in the healthy exercise of swimming and +boating and cricket. He still preaches with energy and impressiveness, +and large congregations gather at the nave services in the Cathedral, +where his voice is heard throughout the building. It is said that his +portrait is to be hung up among the city worthies in the Town Hall. His +sterling goodness, his generosity, his unfailing courtesy and kindness +have endeared him to everyone; and all would readily allow that he is +the best-loved citizen of the comely little Yorkshire town. + +The near view of Ripon Cathedral is not particularly striking; its +beauty is more impressive at a distance. Inside, however, though at +first appearance somewhat bare-looking, there is much that is beautiful +in architectural design. One is struck with its really magnificent width +particularly, and the curious and sudden breaking up of the Norman arch, +near the nave, by a Gothic pillar. The carving, however, of the stalls +is very fine, and in many instances of great rarity. Beneath the stalls +are many quaint specimens of the carver's handiwork. Beneath the +Bishop's throne are the two spies of Joshua carrying the grapes, and a +couple of giants are represented on either side, one all head and no +body, the other all body with his head in the middle. Another stall +shows Jonah being thrown overboard, with a whale waiting with open mouth +to receive him, and near at hand is a carving of Pontius Pilate +wheeling away Judas in a wheelbarrow with his bag of silver. + +Yet amongst all that is interesting in and about the cathedral nothing +is more so than the Saxon Chapel under the crypt. It is the earliest +known place of worship in the kingdom, its architecture being about the +seventh century. We light our candles and follow the verger down the +stone steps. The descent is a trifle treacherous. There are little +niches in the wall where candles are placed. Then we enter the chapel. +It is perfectly dark, and smells very earthy. A hole in one side of the +wall is pointed out. Tradition says that in the old days, when people +had anything suspicious against them, they were brought to this spot. If +they succeeded in crawling through to the other side they were +blameless; if they could not, they were unquestionably guilty. It is +also said that the young damsel who creeps through is sure to get +married within the year. Be this as it may, I was assured that very +recently a Yorkshire farmer brought his three daughters and sought +permission for them to crawl through the lucky hole. Another daughter +who had been through succeeded in getting married, and the father of the +remaining trio was anxious for them to see whether a journey through the +wall might not help him to more readily dispose of his daughters! + +[Illustration: THE DEAN OF RIPON. + +_From a Photo. by Elliott & Fry._] + + HARRY HOW. + + + + +_A Little Surprise._[A] + +ADAPTED FROM THE FRENCH OF ABRAHAM DREYFUS + +BY CONSTANCE BEERBOHM. + +[Illustration] + + +CHARACTERS: + + SIR WILLIAM BEAUCHAMP, BART. (43). + LADY FLORENCE BEAUCHAMP (39). + KATE DUGDALE (18). + MR. JAMES DUGDALE (23). + PORTER, _the Lady's-maid_ (30). + +SCENE: _A country drawing-room. A French window opening on to a flower +garden at the back of the stage. Doors right and left. A sofa, +arm-chairs, smaller chairs, etc._ + +_At the rise of the curtain, JEM and KITTY are discovered sitting with +their backs to one another, evidently sulking. JEM looks round every now +and then, trying to catch his wife's eye, and she studiously avoids his +glance. At length their eyes meet._ + +JEM (_rises_): No! I tell you I can't stand it! + +KITTY: And why not? I always went out with the guns at home. + +JEM: "At home" and your husband's house are two very different places. + +KITTY: So I find! + +JEM: And I have told you over and over again I detest to see any +woman--more especially a girl of eighteen, like yourself--tramping over +the moors in gaiters, and a skirt by a long way too short! + +KITTY: Perhaps, with your old-maidish ideas, you would like to see me +taking my walks abroad with a train as long as my Court frock! + +JEM: Perversity! + +KITTY: I only know that papa, mamma, and grandmamma always said---- + +JEM: Ah! But your grandmother---- + +KITTY: How dare you speak in that way of dear grandmamma? + +JEM: I never said a word against her---- + +KITTY: But you were going to! + +JEM: Nothing of the sort. + +KITTY (_repeats_): I only know that papa, mamma, and grandmamma always +said---- + +JEM: Oh, Heavens! (_He escapes._) + +KITTY: Was ever anyone so wretched as I? Only three months married, and +to find my husband an obstinate, vindictive, strait-laced country +bumpkin! Well, not a bumpkin perhaps, after all, but almost as bad as +that! Why, oh! why did I leave my happy home, where I could do what I +liked from morning till night, and no one was ever disagreeable to me? +And yet during my engagement what a lovely time I had! Jem seemed so +kind and gentle, and promised me he would never say a cross word to me! +He declared our married life should be one long sunshiny summer day; +whilst I promised to be his little ministering angel! I reminded him of +that yesterday. And what did he say? That he had never thought a little +ministering angel could be such a little brute! I can hardly believe he +is the same man I used to love so dearly! (_Exit in tears._) + +(_After a moment, PORTER, the lady's-maid, enters, ushering in LADY +FLORENCE BEAUCHAMP._) + +LADY FLO: Your mistress is not here, after all, Porter? + +PORTER: No, milady! Yet I heard her voice only a few moments ago. + +LADY FLO: Well then, Porter, you must go and tell her a lady wishes to +speak with her in the boudoir, and be sure not to say who the "lady" is, +however much she may ask. I wish this visit to be a little surprise to +her. Nor must you mention that Sir William is here. + +(_Enter KITTY, with traces of tears on her face._) + +LADY FLO: Kitty, darling, Kitty! + +KITTY: Aunty! Can it be you? This is delightful! (_They embrace._) + +LADY FLO: I'm glad you call it delightful! I came here as a little +surprise to you; but I daresay you will think me a great bore for taking +you by storm, and interrupting your _tete-a-tete_ with Jem. + +KITTY: Oh! far from it! I am only too, too happy you've come! + +LADY FLO: Is that the real truth? + +KITTY: Indeed, it is! + +LADY FLO: I thought I should find you as blooming as a rose in June; but +you are not quite so flourishing as I expected. Those pretty eyes look +as if--as if--well, as if you had a cold in the head! + +KITTY: They look as if I had been crying, you mean! And so I have. +(_Bursts into tears afresh, and throws herself into LADY FLO'S arms._) + +(_Enter SIR WILLIAM and JEM, the former standing amazed. KITTY, leaving +LADY FLO'S arms, throws herself into those of SIR WILLIAM, with renewed +sobs. SIR WILLIAM turns in surprise to JEM. LADY FLO looks down in +embarrassment._) + +JEM: Oh! yes, Kitty! This is all very well. Why not tell them I'm a +monster at once? + +KITTY: And so you are! + +JEM (_aside_): Have you no sense of decency? + +LADY FLO (_aside_): This is truly shocking. + +SIR W. (_aside_): Good Heavens! + +KITTY: Is it my fault that my uncle and aunt are witnesses of your +ill-temper? + +(_Enter PORTER._) + +PORTER: Your ladyship's trunks have just arrived from the station. + +LADY FLO (_hesitating_): Let them be taken back again. + +SIR W.: We had intended staying but an hour or two. + +JEM (_to SIR W._): But I beg you to stay. + +KITTY (_to LADY FLO_): Never were you so much needed. + +JEM (_to PORTER_): Let her ladyship's trunks be taken to the Blue Rooms. + +KITTY: Not to the Blue Rooms. They are quite damp. (_To JEM_) I may +speak a word in my own house, I suppose? (_To PORTER_) Let the trunks be +taken to the Turret Room. + +JEM: The chimneys smoke there. + +KITTY: Excuse me. They do not. + +JEM: Excuse _me_. They do. + +SIR W.: They smoked once upon a time, perhaps, but may not now. + +PORTER: Where may I say the luggage is to be carried? + +JEM: Take your orders from your mistress. + +KITTY: No! From your master! + +JEM (_to KITTY_): Spare me at least before the lady's-maid! + +KITTY (_to JEM_): Oh! nobody knows better how you behave than Porter. +Our quarrels are no secret from _her_. + +JEM: That must be your fault. How can she know of them but from you? + +KITTY: I tell her nothing. But your voice would reach to the ends of the +earth. + +JEM: As for yours--why---- + +KITTY: Grandmamma always said my voice was the most gentle she had ever +heard. + +JEM: But, then, your grandmother---- + +SIR W. (_to LADY FLO_): I really think we had better leave, after all. + +LADY FLO (_affectionately_): No! dearest Will! I really think we had +better stay. + +SIR W.: For _my_ part---- + +LADY FLO: I tell you we _must_ stay. + +SIR W.: Very well, Flo, as you wish. You always know best. (_They +exchange smiles._) + +LADY FLO (_to JEM_): Kitty will take me to my room. So I leave my better +half in your good company. (_Exit with KITTY._) + +SIR W.: I can't help regretting I came here, old fellow. It was your +aunt's idea. I made objections. But she insisted that you'd both be glad +enough to have a little interruption in your honeymoon. + +JEM: She never said a truer word. + +SIR W.: Then the honeymoon is not so great a success, after all? + +JEM: To tell the truth, it's all a ghastly failure! + +SIR W.: Poor boy! Believe me, I'm awfully sorry for you. (_Puts his hand +on JEM'S shoulder._) + +JEM: I'm awfully glad you're sorry. + +SIR W.: I pity you from my heart. + +JEM: Thanks very much. + +SIR W.: For my part, if I led a cat-and-dog life with your aunt, I +should wish to blow my brains out. + +JEM: So that's the advice you give me! (_Moves towards door._) + +SIR W.: Oh! no! All I want is five minutes' chat with you. Anything that +affects Flo's niece naturally affects me. + +JEM: Naturally. (_Laughs._) + +SIR W.: Now come! Tell me! How did your misunderstandings begin? + +JEM: I really couldn't say. + +SIR W.: And yet quarrels always have a beginning. + +JEM: Of course, when women are so confoundedly selfish. + +SIR W.: Kitty is selfish? + +JEM: I don't want to make any complaints about her. Yet I must admit +that she takes absolutely no interest in anything which interests me. +You know my hobby--fishing---- + +SIR W.: And Kitty doesn't care for fishing? + +JEM: Not she! Though, finding myself here, surrounded with trout +streams, you may imagine how I was naturally anxious to spend my days. +Kitty said fishing was a bore, and after having come out with me once or +twice, she sternly refused to do so any more. And why? Simply because +she wanted to tramp about with the shooters from Danby. + +SIR W.: All this is but a trifling dissimilarity of taste, and +insufficient to cause a real estrangement. + +JEM: A trifling dissimilarity! Why, our tastes differ in every essential +point! Kitty has got it into her head that a woman should take an +interest in things "outside herself." A friend of her mother's, who used +to conduct her to the British Museum, taught her to believe in +Culture--with a capital "C." To hear her talk of Pompeiian marbles, +Flaxman's designs, and all that sort of thing--why, it's sickening! + +SIR W.: It strikes me you are unreasonable. + +JEM: Oh, no! I'm not! A woman who takes an interest in things outside +herself becomes a nuisance. + +[Illustration: SIR W.: "IT STRIKES ME YOU ARE UNREASONABLE." + +JEM: "OH, NO! I'M NOT!"] + +SIR W.: And yet I believe that with a little tact, a little gentleness, +you would be able to manage Kitty, just as I have managed your aunt all +these long years. There is no doubting the dear girl's affection for +you. Remember her joy when her mother's scruples as to the length of +your engagement were overcome. + +JEM: That's true enough. Kitty was very fond of me three months ago. But +it isn't only fondness I require of a wife. She must be bored when I'm +bored, and keen when I'm keen, and that sort of thing, you know. + +SIR W.: Yes! I see. In fact, lose her identity, as your dear good aunt +has lost hers! + +JEM (_aside_): Or, rather, as you have lost yours! + +SIR W.: Well, I'll try and view things in your light, my good fellow. At +the same time, you must have great patience--very great patience, Jem, +and then all may come right in the end. It _is_ true I never needed +patience with your aunt. But had there been the necessity, I should have +been equal to the demand. Now, I daresay your little quarrels have been +but short lived; and that after having caused Kitty any vexation, you +have always been ready to come forward with kind words to make up your +differences? + +JEM: Yes, ready! But not _too_ ready, as I feared too much indulgence +might not be advisable. Now, one morning, after having been out early, I +determined to give up fishing for the rest of the day to please Kitty. +On my way home--remember, it was before eight o'clock--I met her +betaking herself to what she calls "matins." Now, I like a girl to be +good and strict, and all that sort of thing. But imagine going to church +at eight o'clock on a Monday morning! + +SIR W.: A slight error in judgment; you might easily forgive the dear +child. + +JEM: I didn't find it easy. I said so. And Kitty refused her breakfast +in consequence--only to aggravate me. + +SIR W.: No! No! Perhaps she fasted only to soften your heart! + +JEM: Far from it. In fact, to sum up the whole matter, we have no common +sympathies. Kitty has not even any ambition, for instance, as to my +future. You know I wish to stand for Portborough one day? + +SIR W.: _You!!_ + +JEM: Why not? + +SIR W.: Oh, no! Of course! Why not, as you say? + +JEM: Yet if I begin to discuss it all with her, _she_ begins to yawn; +and her yawning drives me nearly mad, when I am talking on a matter of +vital interest. + +SIR W.: Dear! Dear! I begin to find all this more serious than I +thought. For it does seem to me as if you differed on most subjects. + +JEM (_moodily_): So we do. + +SIR W.: Ah! I am afraid it may be pretty serious! And after listening to +all your story I can't help feeling, my dear fellow, that there is not +the chance of things bettering themselves, as I had hoped in the first +instance. + +JEM: You feel that? + +SIR W.: I do! I do! This divergence of taste and sympathies is no +laughing matter. It rather alarms me when I think that the abyss between +you and your wife as time goes on may only widen. (_He indicates an +imaginary abyss, which JEM stares at dubiously._) Yes! widen--and widen! + +JEM (_after a moment's pause of half surprise, half pain_): What you say +is not consoling. + +SIR W.: At first I thought differently; but now I hesitate to mislead +you, and I admit my heart sinks when I think of your future, after +hearing all you have to say. Indeed, I hope I may be mistaken. I have, +as you know, but little experience in these matters. Your aunt and I +have lived in undisturbed harmony these fifteen years. Never has an +angry word been heard within our walls. + +JEM: Whilst Kitty and I squabbled as soon as we had left the rice and +slippers behind us! And since then scarcely an hour has passed without +some sort of difference. I declare, when I think over it, that it would +be best for us to plunge into the ice at once. A separation is the only +hope for us. But, hush! I think I hear Aunt Flo's and Kitty's footsteps! +(_Lowers his voice, speaking rapidly_) For Heaven's sake, don't breathe +a word of what I have said! Fool that I've been! Worse than a +fool--disloyal! Not a word to my aunt! + +SIR W.: Oh! I promise you! (_Mysteriously into Jem's ear_) Women are so +indiscreet. Now, I wouldn't tell your aunt for the wide world! + +(_Enter LADY FLO and KITTY, who have overheard the last words._) + +LADY FLO (_icily_): I beg pardon! We interrupt! + +JEM: Not at all! We were merely discussing the relations of man and +wife! Uncle Will has been telling me that a wife--you, under the +circumstances--has everything in her own hands. + +[Illustration: SIR W.: "WOMEN ARE SO INDISCREET."] + +LADY FLO (_flattered_): Indeed! + +KITTY: Indeed! I must say that no one could appreciate Aunt Flo's +virtues more than I, although at the same time I am certain she would +very soon have lost her sweet temper if her husband had been +aggravating, ignorant, domineering! + +JEM: Why not call me a savage at once? + +KITTY: A savage! Yes! A savage! + +LADY FLO: Oh! Kitty! Kitty! Is this the way to make friends? + +JEM: Come, Uncle Will! Let us go into the smoking-room! I shall choke +here! (_Exit._) + +SIR W.: There's but little hope for them! Little hope! Little hope! +(_Exit, shaking his head._) + +KITTY: Now, perhaps, you believe that I have something to put up with? + +LADY FLO (_soothingly_): And yet there's no doubt Jem is extremely fond +of you. + +KITTY: He has a strange way of showing it! The other morning, after we +had had one of our little scenes, I went down to the stream to find him +when he was fishing. I would even have been willing to try and bait +(_shudders_) his hook. But as I was starting off I met him coming up the +garden, and he stared at me like an avenging god (or demon, I should +say), and asked if I wasn't on my way to matins? Naturally, I did not +contradict him. + +LADY FLO: Dearest! You distress me! + +KITTY: There's another thing I can't endure! You know I took the pledge, +so as to be a good example to the village people here. Well! Jem is +furious every time I refuse wine at luncheon or dinner. He declares that +I _pose_! Can you imagine such nonsense? + +LADY FLO: Well, dear! I confess I sympathize with Jem. I don't think any +really nice women ever take the pledge--do they? I only ask, you know. + +KITTY: Why, yes! Of course they do, aunty--when they want to be good +examples. Jem cannot understand this; and, far from taking the pledge +himself, he revolts me day after day by drinking--(_whispers +mysteriously_)--Bass's pale ale! + +LADY FLO: Ah! That's bad! But, oh! my dear, if you only knew the proper +way to manage a husband! + +KITTY: How could I? For Jem is as unmanageable as the Great Mogul. + +LADY FLO: I see you don't realize how the most violent men are those +most easy to subdue. Now, there's your uncle---- + +KITTY: I always thought him as mild as Moses! + +LADY FLO: So he is _now_! But there _was_ a time---- + +KITTY: Oh! Do tell me all about it! + +LADY FLO: Well. There _was_ a time when your uncle imagined he might be +allowed to complain if dinner were late. One day he actually dared to +ask, in a voice of thunder, "Is dinner ready?" + +KITTY: Jem dares that every day. + +LADY FLO: It happened to be the cook's fault. + +KITTY: Ah! That would make no difference to Jem. + +LADY FLO (_impatient_): I wish, darling, you would allow me to speak! + +KITTY: Oh! I beg pardon. + +LADY FLO (_continuing, blandly_): Not at all! Now, I replied: "The +salmon has just fallen into the fire, and cook has had to send for +another!" + +KITTY: That was true? + +LADY FLO: Not in the least! I had ordered red mullet. And Will ate his +fish without noticing the difference. + +KITTY: Jem would not have made that mistake. + +LADY FLO: Oh, yes, he would, if you had just glanced at him in the right +manner. + +KITTY (_eagerly_): Show me how to do it! + +LADY FLO (_drily_): It requires the inspiration of the moment. Ah! could +you but see me with Will! + +KITTY: It is certain you are very happy together. + +LADY FLO: So we are; owing to my always using sweetness, firmness, and +indifference just at the right moment. But all this, I confess, requires +intelligence. + +KITTY: Had I but the intelligence! It must be splendid to be able to +avert a coming storm in this way. + +LADY FLO: There never has been the question of a storm between Will and +me! + +KITTY: Happy, happy people! + +LADY FLO: And you, my very dear children, must become happy, happy +people too! William would feel your sorrow as deeply as I. We must do +all in our power to restore peace and comfort between you! I shall try +my very utmost to show you your little failings--here and there--you +know. And as for Will! Why, he'll talk Jem over in no time! Before a +week is out we shall see you walking arm-in-arm to matins--the happiest +couple in all Yorkshire. + +KITTY: Impossible! + +LADY FLO: Nay! We can but try. (_Enter_ SIR WILLIAM.) Ah! Here comes +your uncle. Now, run away, dear, and leave us alone for a discreet +little talk. Who knows but what we may hit upon a plan to help you! +(_Exit_ KITTY.) + +LADY FLO: Will, dearest! We must talk very seriously over our niece and +nephew together. + +SIR W. (_aside_): It is high time! + +LADY FLO: But, first of all, by the way, I want to know what it was you +were saying to Jem, when I came into the room a few minutes ago. + +SIR W. (_consciously_): To Jem? Why, I was saying nothing to Jem! + +LADY FLO: Oh, yes, you were! Now try to remember. Kitty and I heard you +talking in quite an excited manner as we came downstairs. Then as we +came nearer the door you lowered your voice. + +SIR W.: Indeed, _no_! + +LADY FLO: Yes, yes, you did, dear! + +SIR W.: No, no, I didn't, dear! + +LADY FLO: Don't tell fibs, darling. + +SIR W.: You want to know too much, my dear, good Flo. + +LADY FLO: Too much? Oh, no! That would be impossible! However, I know +you will tell me the whole truth by-and-by. + +SIR W.: First let me know what you have to say. + +LADY FLO: Well, I'm in the deepest distress about the two young people. +They seem to be at terrible loggerheads. Now, perhaps Jem confided the +secret of his unhappy married life to you? + +SIR W.: He never said a word about it! (_Bites his lip._) + +LADY FLO: Nevertheless, I assure you they lead a cat-and-dog existence. + +SIR W.: Oh, dear, dear! Is that so? + +LADY FLO: Why, of course! You saw them quarrelling yourself. But still I +have hopes we may be able to arrange matters a little better for them. +Who knows but what we may see them re-united before we leave this house? + +SIR W.: We will do our best to help them, poor young things! + +LADY FLO: Yes! Poor young things! + +SIR W.: And I've no doubt we shall succeed. + +LADY FLO: At the same time, it seems to me as if the abyss between them +_may_ widen. + +SIR W.: That may be so. The abyss _may_ widen! (_Indicates an imaginary +abyss, at which LADY FLO shakes her head_). + +LADY FLO: If a man and woman aren't made for one another---- + +SIR W.: Like you and me. I pointed that out to Jem. + +LADY FLO: I'm afraid it didn't affect him as it ought. (_With a +sentimental sigh_) The only consolation we can derive from the +misfortune of our nephew and niece is that we are happier than they! + +SIR W.: Clever little woman! (_Kisses her._) + +LADY FLO: Dear old Will! (_Kisses him. Then with a sudden change of +tone_) But now I _must_ hear what it was Jem was saying to you when I +came into the room! You answered that "of course you wouldn't tell his +aunt for the wide world." That must have been a _facon de parler_! + +[Illustration: SIR W.: "THE ABYSS MAY WIDEN!" (INDICATES AN IMAGINARY +ABYSS.)] + +SIR W.: Of course! of course! And you shall know all about it as soon as +I have asked Jem's leave. Meanwhile we must attend to the fates of these +unhappy young people. We had better first try to show them their +grievous fault as gently as possible, and if gentleness does not +answer---- + +LADY FLO: Oh, yes! Gentleness is all very well! But I tell you quite +candidly, Will, that before we talk of gentleness I must insist on +knowing what it is you told Jem that you would not let me hear. + +SIR W.: The fact is, my dear----(_Coughs._) + +LADY FLO: Tell me what the fact is, and at once, my dear! + +SIR W.: The facts are, dear child----(_Coughs again._) + +LADY FLO (_irritated_): Don't cough! + +SIR W. (_continues coughing_): Well! it's a long story. + +LADY FLO: Haven't you a lozenge? + +SIR W.: Never mind the lozenge! The story, I say, is a long one. + +LADY FLO: Long or short, I must hear it! + +SIR W.: I'll tell it to you, later on. + +LADY FLO: I begin to suspect you can't tell me all about it, +simply--because you _can't_! + +SIR W.: Oh! I can! I could! + +LADY FLO: Oh, no, you can't. You couldn't, and you ought to be ashamed +of yourself! + +SIR W.: You are going just a little bit too far, Florence. + +LADY FLO: Oh, no; it was _you_ who went too far. Why, I knew it by the +look on your face the instant I came into the room! + +SIR W. (_aside_): She is going very much too far. (_Aloud_) Nonsense! + +LADY FLO: I beg pardon? + +SIR W.: I repeat "Nonsense." And _ridiculous nonsense_! + +LADY FLO: Then, how dare you? + +SIR W.: You forget yourself strangely. + +LADY FLO: Do not attempt to adopt your nephew's manner to his wife +towards me! + +SIR W.: It is _you_, my love, who are unfortunate in your choice of a +manner this morning; and although pettishness in a young girl like Kitty +has a certain little charm of its own---- + +LADY FLO: Yes! + +SIR W.: When a woman has reached your time of life---- + +LADY FLO (_furious_): Yes!!! + +SIR W.: Petulance sits remarkably ill upon her--upon _you_, my dear---- + +LADY FLO: When a man has reached your time of life and remains as great +a fool---- + +SIR W. (_furious_): A fool? + +LADY FLO: Yes! As great a fool and an idiot as ever---- + +SIR W.: I was always aware you had the very devil of a temper, Florence, +and now, after fifteen years of married life, I make the discovery that +you can be excessively--ahem!--unladylike. + +LADY FLO: It's highly amusing to hear you express an opinion on the +subject of how a lady should behave. When one remembers your sisters, +one is inclined to believe you were not, perhaps, brought up in a school +of the very highest standard. + +SIR W.: You insult my sisters! _(Becomes much excited and takes her by +the arm.)_ Repeat that again! + +(_Enter JEM. Stands in amazement._) + +JEM: For Heaven's sake, what _is_ the matter? + +SIR W.: Ask your Aunt Florence, my dear boy. + +LADY FLO: I feel positively ashamed that you should come upon us--upon +your uncle, I mean--at a moment when he is behaving like a raving +madman! + +JEM: A raving madman! My uncle Jem! + +LADY FLO: Man-like, you side with a man! (_With increasing agitation_) I +have always known your uncle to be a weak, nerveless----(_Enter KITTY. +Looks around, dumfounded._) + +[Illustration: JEM: "WHAT IS THE MATTER?"] + +KITTY: Dear aunty! I'm frightened! You can't be well! What does this +mean? + +LADY FLO: Only that your husband is inciting mine to be abusive. + +KITTY: Impossible! + +LADY FLO: Woman-like, you side with a man! Let me tell you that your +poor uncle is pitiable in his foolishness this morning. + +SIR W.: Florence! Once for all, I assert my authority. Be silent this +moment, or I shall feel obliged to ask you to return home. + +LADY FLO: Without you? + +SIR W.: If that pleases you! + +LADY FLO: It would suit me remarkably well. + +SIR W.: In that case--"Go!" + +LADY FLO: I shall, instantly; and when you desire to come home, I shall +give the servants orders not to admit you---- + +SIR W. (_turning to JEM_): A man not admitted to his own house! That's +rather too good, isn't it, Jem? + +LADY FLO: We shall see! (_Turns to KITTY_) Meanwhile, Kitty, I bid you +good-bye. + +KITTY: Oh! Aunty! You can't mean that! Pray don't say good-bye! + +LADY FLO (_dramatically_): Yes, I mean "_Good-bye_"! (_Brushes furiously +past SIR WILLIAM, and exit. KITTY makes movement to follow, but returns +to SIR WILLIAM and JEM._) + +SIR W. _(bitterly):_ Don't hold her back, Kitty. + +JEM: You are mad! + +SIR W.: Less mad than you, when an hour ago you told me you found life +intolerable with Kitty. + +KITTY (_moved_): He said that? _Jem_ said that to you? + +JEM: No, no! (_Compunctious._) + +SIR W.: Oh! It's an easy matter for two young people to kiss again with +tears. 'Twill be a different matter between your aunt and me. Florence +will have no chance, however much she may wish it. The time has come +for me to put down my foot at last. (_Exit, talking and gesticulating +angrily._) + +(_After the exit of SIR WILLIAM, JEM and KITTY look up slowly at one +another. Their eyes meet. They turn away._) + +JEM: (_much embarrassed_): Kitty! + +KITTY: Jem! + +JEM: This is painful! In fact, it's worse than wicked--it's vulgar! + +KITTY (_gently_): It's simply dreadful to see two people behaving in +such a way. + +JEM: And at their time of life! + +KITTY: That's the awful part of it! + +JEM: I wonder how they can do it! + +KITTY (_archly, yet on the verge of tears_): So do I! + +(_At the last words they turn; their eyes meet. KITTY falters. JEM +falters. After a moment they fall into one another's arms._) + +[Illustration: KITTY: "SPLENDID! I NEVER SAW ANYTHING SO WELL DONE!" + +SIR W.: "IT'S NO LAUGHING MATTER!"] + +_Enter PORTER_: Her ladyship has bidden me to put her trunks together, +ma'am. + +KITTY: Wait a minute, Porter. Perhaps I can persuade her ladyship to +stay. (_Voices from without._) + +LADY FLO: I wish to go this instant, and alone. + +SIR W.: By all means, and to-morrow my lawyer shall wait on you. + +LADY FLO: And mine on you. (_After a moment, they enter._) + +LADY FLO: And it has come to this, William! + +SIR W.: By mutual consent. This is the happiest day of my life. I +breathe again. I know now I have never breathed until this moment since +the day I married you! + +LADY FLO: This is beyond everything! (_Violently excited._) + +JEM (_whispers aside to KITTY, unobserved; play on both sides; then, +after evidently agreeing on a plan, pretend to treat the matter as a +joke; advancing_): Bravo! Bravissimo! _Capital!_ (_Roars with forced +laughter._) + +KITTY: Splendid! I never saw anything so well done! (_Joins her husband +in laughter._) + +SIR W.: It's no laughing matter! + +JEM: Ha! ha! I daresay not. + +KITTY: Irving and Ellen Terry are not in it! (_Continues laughing._) + +LADY FLO: What _can_ you mean? + +JEM: Oh, don't pretend that you and my uncle have not been getting up +this little comedy of a quarrel, merely to show Kitty and me what fools +we look when _we_ are fighting! Why! It was better than any play I ever +saw! + +SIR W.: It's all been in sober earnest, I assure you. + +(_LADY FLO recovers slightly. Looks first at JEM, then at KITTY, and +lastly at SIR WILLIAM._) + +LADY FLO (_slowly_): You call--all--this--a little comedy? (_Recovers +more, but very gradually._) + +KITTY: Why, yes! Don't attempt to say it wasn't--(_slyly_)--especially +after all you told me this morning about how cleverly you manage my +uncle. Just let me see you glance at him in the way you said you could. +(_Whispering._) + +(_LADY FLO further recovers herself. Her expression softens. After a +minute or two she smiles meaningly to herself._) + +JEM: Now, Uncle Will, do finish off by pretending to make up the +quarrel! There's my aunt waiting with her smile already! + +SIR W. (_stupidly_): _Pretend_ to make up the quarrel? + +LADY FLO (_suddenly radiant_): Why, yes! You silly old goose! Don't you +see the fun? Pretend to give me a kiss at once. (_They kiss._) + +JEM and KITTY (_aside_): That's a comfort. (_They walk up stage._) + +LADY FLO (_aside to SIR WILLIAM_): I can see you are dying to make +amends for all you have just said! + +SIR W.: I don't deny that I may be! + +LADY FLO: Then tell me what it was you were concocting with Jem! There's +an old dear! + +SIR W.: Since we are all good friends again I don't mind telling you Jem +was confiding his little troubles to me. + +LADY FLO: But you had already found them out! + +SIR W.: And also that there was a possibility of a separation! + +LADY FLO: Silly children! + +SIR W.: Had you not at once flown into a rage, I should have broken my +promise to Jem, and have told you all! + +LADY FLO: That was quite right of you. (_They walk up stage, amicably, +arm-in-arm. JEM and KITTY walk to CENTRE._) + +JEM: You will find me ready dressed to start for eight o'clock matins, +to-morrow morning, Kitty! + +KITTY: Oh! That's very much too much to ask of you! + +JEM: Not at all! Providing you won't insist on going out with the guns. + +KITTY: I shall only wish what _you_ wish from this day forward, dearest +Jem! + +JEM: That's all right! (_They kiss, laughingly, as the curtain descends. +LADY FLO and SIR WILLIAM look on smiling._) + +FOOTNOTES: + +[A] The rights of representation are reserved. + + + + +ZIG ZAGS AT THE ZOO + +ZIG ZAG CURSOREAN + +ARTHUR MORRISON AND J. R. SHEPARD + +[Illustration] + + +Such birds as, having wings, fly not, preferring to walk, to run, or to +waddle, as legs and other circumstances may permit or compel--these are +the cursores: such birds also as, having no wings, or none to speak of, +run by compulsion on such legs as they may muster. These are many--so +many that I almost repent me of the heading to this chapter, wherein I +may speak only of the struthiones among the cursores--the curious +cassowary, the quaint kiwi, the raucous rhea, the errant emeu, and the +overtopping ostrich. But the heading is there--let it stand; for in the +name of the cursores I see the raw material of many sad jokes--whereunto +I pray I may never be tempted, but may leave them for an easy exercise +for such as have set out upon the shameless career of the irreclaimable +pun-flinger. + +[Illustration: "GET OUT OF THIS!"] + +It was some time--years--before I got rid of the impression left upon me +by the first ostrich with which I became acquainted. He lived in an old +picture-book, and would nowadays be considered quite out of fashion by +up-to-date ostriches, having webbed feet and an improper number of toes. +I like to believe that feet of this sort were popular among ostriches at +that time, being loath to destroy early beliefs. From the same cause, I +have other little private superstitions about the ostrich; there was no +ostrich, so far as I can remember, in my Noah's ark, whence I derive my +conviction that the species cannot have existed at the time of the +Deluge, but has been evolved, in the succeeding centuries, by a gradual +approach and assimilation of the several characteristics of the camel +and the goose. + +The two ostriches here, at the Zoo, have no pet names bestowed on them +by the keepers. This is inconvenient, not to say unfair. They have been +placed, it will be observed, in the stables hitherto occupied by the +late lamented giraffes. It is a striking and notable instance of care +and the sense of fitness of things on the part of the Society. These +stables, they probably reflected, have all along been fitted with +tenants twenty feet high--queer tenants, which were often called +camelopards. We can't replace these with similar tenants, unfortunately, +but we will do our best with animals as high as possible and with all +available neck; and they shall be camel-geese. And here they are; a few +feet short, unavoidably, but as high as possible; quite the equivalent +of the giraffes so far as concerns the camel, and as much superior as +one may consider a goose to a leopard. And here you may stand and watch +them, or sit. And you may watch, if you please, for the coming of the +giraffes which the Society are now anxious to buy, or for the wandering +wraiths of those dead, dispossessed, and indignant. Meantime inventing +names for the two camel-geese--let us say Atkinson and Pontius Pilate. + +[Illustration: ATKINSON DOZES.] + +[Illustration: HIGH KICKS.] + +I like to stand by Atkinson till he dozes. Atkinson is a fine, big +fellow, and when he squats down his head is in a convenient position for +observation. Presently he gapes; then his eyes shut, and his beak +droops--just a very little. Then the beak droops a little more, and +signs of insecurity appear about the neck. Very soon a distinct +departure from the vertical is visible in that neck; it melts down +ruinously till almost past recovery, and then suddenly springs erect, +carrying an open-eyed head, wherefrom darts a look of indignant +repudiation of any disposition to fall asleep; and so keeps until the +eyes close again. I have waited long, but have never seen Atkinson fall +permanently asleep. + +[Illustration: GILLIE CALLUM.] + +The possibilities of the ostrich are not properly recognised. He is +domesticated, and bred with the utmost ignominy in a poultry run, and +his tail is pulled out with impunity. I am not quite sure that he +habitually figures on South African dinner tables with his legs skewered +to his ribs, but he has fallen quite low enough for that; submitting +even to the last indignity of being hatched out by a common stove +incubator. Now, the elephant has also been domesticated, but he has also +been allowed to adopt a profession. He dances on a tub and rides a +tricycle at a circus. Nothing of this sort has been attempted with the +ostrich, but much might be done. He would make a first-rate bicyclist, +and could get through much of the business of the "eccentric comedian." +A couple of them would go to make a capital knockabout act. High kicks +of the very highest, floor-strides of the very longest--and there would +be a world of opportunities in the neck. No end of possibilities lie in +the neck--even the "legitimate." You could run in a forty-minute sketch, +wherein two long-separated but faithful lovers should fall against each +other and wind their necks about together like a caduceus, or +barley-sugar--or anything. Also the camel-goose might fling his neck +about the villain, and strangle him. But perhaps, after all, variety +business would suit best. Pontius Pilate in a kilt and philibeg would +bring down the house with a Highland fling or gillie callum. And +Atkinson in a long-stride table chair and banjo act would be comforting +to the perceptions. + +[Illustration: LONG SEPARATED.] + +Whether the ostrich is actually such an ass as to hide his head with a +notion of concealing himself I don't quite know, but there is certainly +a deal of ass in the camel-goose. A Hottentot will put an ostrich skin +over his head, and walking with his natural shanks exposed get among an +ostrich family and kill them off one after another, to the family's +astonishment. Now, a bird who mistakes a nigger with a mask for an +intimate relation plainly enjoys in his composition a large flavour of +the ass. Not knowing it, however, the camel-goose is just as happy, and +neither experiences the bitterness of being sold nor the sweetness of +selling. I don't believe that Atkinson was even aware of the triumphant +sell which he lately assisted in administering to Mr. Toots, the cat +from the camel-house. + +The cat in the ostrich-house is a sly fellow, and I believe he knows why +there are fewer pigeons in the roof of the hippopotamus-house than there +were. He horribly sold Mr. Toots, who was anxious to have a snack of +poultry himself, for a change. "In my house," said this bold, bad cat, +"there are the biggest pigeons you ever saw. Go in and try one, while I +look out for the keeper." And the trustful Mr. Toots went in; and when, +full of a resolve to make it hot for everything feathered in that house, +Mr. Toots bounced into the presence of Atkinson, who is rather more than +seven feet high, he came out anxious for the scalp of that other cat. I +never mention this little adventure to Mr. Toots, who is sensitive, but +all the other Zoo cats chaff him terribly. Even Jung Perchad and the +other elephants snigger quietly as they pass, and Bob the Bactrian, from +the camel-house, laughs outright; it is a horrid, coarse, vulgar, +exasperating laugh, that of Bob's. Atkinson, however, is all unconscious +of the joke, and remains equally affable to cats, pigeons, and human +beings. + +[Illustration] + +Pontius Pilate is just the sort of camel-gander that _would_ bury its +head to hide itself. Pontius Pilate is, I fear, an ass; also a snob. He +has a deal of curiosity with regard to Atkinson, who is a recent +arrival, and lately belonged to the Queen. Also, he is often disposed to +pay a visit--with his head--to Atkinson's quarters, and take a friendly +snack--at Atkinson's expense; this by an insinuation of the neck out +between his own bars and in between those of Atkinson, adjoining. But he +doesn't understand the laws of space. Having once fetched his neck +around the partition into Atkinson's larder by chancing to poke his head +through the end bars, he straightway assumes that what is possible +between some bars is possible between all; and wheresoever he may now be +standing when prompted by companionable peckishness, straight he plunges +among the nearest bars, being mightily astonished at his inability to +reach next door, if by chance he have dropped among bars far from +Atkinson's. He suspects his neck. Is the ungrateful tube playing him +false? Maliciously shortening? Or are his eyes concerned in fraud? He +loops his head back among his own adjoining bars, with a vague suspicion +that they may be Atkinson's after all; and he stretches and struggles +desperately. Some day Pontius Pilate will weave himself among those +bars, basket fashion, only to be extricated by a civil engineer and a +practical smith. Pontius Pilate is the sort of camel-gander that damages +the intellectual reputation of the species. Of course he would bury his +head to hide himself. Equally of course he would muzzle himself to +prevent you from biting him, or tie his legs together to prevent you +from running and catching him, or anything else equally clever. Pontius +Pilate, I have known you long--even loved you, in a way. But I have +observed you closely, and though, like Dogberry, you may have everything +fine about you, I am impelled sorrowfully to write you down an ass. + +The ostrich is one of those birds whose whole command of facial +expression is carried in the neck. He can only express himself through +his features by offering you different views of his head. This is a +great disadvantage. It limits the range. You may express three +sentiments by the back, front, and side of the head, and something by +way of combination in a three-quarter face. Then you stop, and have no +further resource than standing on your head, one of the few things an +ostrich is not clever at. But with such materials as he has, the ostrich +does very well. Observe, his mouth is long, and droops at the corners; +but the corners are wide apart, for there the head is broad. + +[Illustration] + +Now you may present simple drama by the aid of this mouth--suitably +disposed and ordered by the neck. Take Atkinson, here, whose beak has a +certain tip-tinting distrusted of the teetotaler. Bend his head (only in +theory, because Atkinson won't stand any practical nonsense)--bend his +head to look downward, and let his neck wilt away sleepily. Now, viewed +from the side, where is a more lamentable picture of maudlin +intoxication? What could improve it, except, perhaps, a battered hat, +worn lop-sided, and a cigar-stump? He is a drunken old camel-gander, +coming home in the small hours, and having difficulties with his +latch-key. Straighten Atkinson's neck, open wide his eyes, and take a +three-quarter face view of him. Sober, sour, and indignant, there +stands, not the inebriated Atkinson, but the disturbed Mrs. Atkinson on +the stairs, with a candle, and a nightcap, and a lecture. That awful +mouth actually conjures that candle, that nightcap, and that lecture +into existence--you see and hear them more clearly than you do Atkinson, +although they are not there. But this is an advanced exercise in +struthian expression--a complicated feat, involving various and complex +elements. There is the neck-wilt and the bending of the head; also the +three-quarter face, not a simple element. + +[Illustration] + +The plain and elementary principles of struthian expression lie in the +mere front and side views. The third simple view, the back, is not +particularly eloquent, although practice might do something even for +that. At the side the ostrich is glum, savage, misanthropical, +depressed--what you will of that sort. Let him but turn and face you--he +can't help a genial grin. All done by the versatile neck, you observe, +which gives the head its position. + +[Illustration: GLUM SIDE.] + +[Illustration: GENIAL FRONT.] + +Man, instigated by woman, has a habit of pulling out the camel-gander's +tail. This ruins the appearance of the site of that tail, without +commensurately improving the head whereunto the tail is transplanted--an +unprofitable game of heads and tails, wherein tails lose and heads don't +win. Even the not over clever ostrich knows better than to wear those +feathers on the wrong end. Perhaps he knows that he is enough of a fool +already. + +There is a deal of hidden interest about the ostrich's neck. It is the +cleverest piece of an ostrich--unless you count his stomach; and even in +the triumphs of the stomach the neck takes a great share. When a +camel-goose lunches off a box of dominoes, or a sack of nails, or a +basketful of broken bottles, there is quite as much credit in the feat +due to the neck as to the stomach; with anybody else all the +difficulties of that lunch would begin with the neck--even a thicker +neck. Parenthetically, one remembers that the ostrich's neck is not +always thin. Catch Atkinson here in a roaring soliloquy, and you shall +see his red neck distended as a bladder, with a mighty grumbling and +grunting. This by the way. The neck makes nothing of the domino +difficulty, or the tenpenny nail difficulty, or the door-knob +difficulty, or the broken bottle difficulty--which are not difficulties +to the camel-goose. On the contrary, the neck revels in them and keeps +the dainties as long as possible. Give Pontius Pilate, or Atkinson--I am +quite impartial--an apple. When he swallows it you shall see it, in a +bulge, pass along and _round_ his neck; down it goes and backward, in a +gradual curve, until it disappears among the feathers--corkscrews, in +fact. Observe, I recommend an apple for this demonstration. Dominoes and +clinkers are all very well, but they rattle about inside, and disturb +the visitors; and with an apple you will the more plainly observe that +corkscrew. + +[Illustration: HEADS AND TAILS.] + +[Illustration: A ROARING SOLILOQUY.] + +Not satisfied, you perceive, with enjoying his domino or his door-knob +all the way along that immense neck, the camel-gander must needs indulge +in a spiral gullet. It is mere gluttony. Especially is it wicked of +Atkinson, who has already the longest bird-neck in all these gardens. +Look at the necks of all the cursores. The poor little wingless kiwi, +with a mere nothing of a neck--for a cursore. _He_ does without a spiral +gullet. The festive cassowary--which, by-the-bye, _doesn't_ abound--or +exist--on the plains of Timbuctoo, as the rhyme says--the festive +cassowary, I say, wears his gullet plain. The rusty rhea takes things +below with perfect directness. The lordly emeu gets his dinner down as +quickly as the length of his neck will permit. It is only when one +reaches the top of the cursorean thermometer, all among the boilings, so +to speak, that the ostrich, with the longest neck of all, must poach +another few inches by going in for a spiral. Pontius Pilate is bad +enough, but a spiral for Atkinson!--well, there! + +The partiality of the struthians for eccentric refreshments--clinkers, +nut-crackers, and the like--leads many to a superstition that these +things are as nourishing as they are attractive. They're not. Certain +liberal asses have a curious habit of presenting the birds with +halfpence. I scarcely understand why, unless modern environments have +evolved penny-in-the-slotomaniacs. And I am prepared to bet that on +occasions they are less generous with their pence. Nevertheless, they do +it, and it kills the birds. One cassowary who died recently was found to +contain one and eightpence in copper. I suggest that in future the +experimentalizers confine their contributions to bank-notes. I have +taken the trouble to ascertain that these will do no harm while their +disappearance will afford an additional enjoyment to the contributors +commensurate with their higher value. + +Perhaps there is something in the habits of the cassowary himself that +explains these offerings. The cassowary always comes to meet you at the +bars with a look of grave inquiry. If you offer no tribute he turns off, +with many cockings of the beak, surprised, indignant, and contemptuous. +Very few people can endure this. They hastily produce anything they +have--anything to conciliate the contemptuous cassowary. And as he takes +it, an expression steals across the cassowary's face which seems to +admit that perhaps the fellow isn't such a shocking outsider after all. +When a man has nothing more nutritive about him, this form of extortion +may produce halfpence. + +[Illustration: THE CURSOREAN THERMOMETER.] + +The rhea is small potatoes beside the ostrich--merely a smaller and +dingier camel-gander. But the emeu is a fine upstanding fellow, with his +haughty sailing head and his great feather boa. + +[Illustration: THE CASSOWARY DISGUSTED.] + +He is a friendly and inquisitive chap, and will come stalking down to +the wires to inspect you. If you like to walk up and down outside his +inclosure he will take a turn with you, walking at your side and turning +when you do. He is justly proud of his height and his ruff, but there is +nothing objectionably haughty about the emeu; I have always found him +ready for a quiet chat. He will eat various things, like the ostrich; so +that one regards him with a certain respect, not to say awe, for there +is no telling what wonderful things may or may not be inside him. The +biggest and handsomest emeu here is my particular friend. When he talks +to you or walks by your side he is very fine; but when he walks about a +little way off, with his head to the ground, foraging, he looks rather +like a tortoise on stilts, which is not imposing. Sometimes, when he +thinks nobody is looking, he rushes madly up and down his territory by +way of relieving his pent-up feelings, stopping very suddenly and +looking cautiously about to assure himself that nobody saw him. I call +this emeu Grimaldi; firstly, because Grimaldi is rather a fine name, and +secondly, because when once you have had a view of his head from the +back you can't call him anything else. + +[Illustration: THE PROUD EMEU.] + +[Illustration: GRIMALDI.] + +[Illustration: THE DIET OF WORMS.] + +The most extraordinary bird in the world is the kiwi. But it is not the +most extraordinary bird seen by visitors to the Zoo, because they never +see it. The kiwi buries itself asleep all day, and only comes out in the +night to demolish an unpleasant and inconvenient proverb. The kiwi is +the latest of all the birds, but catches the most worms. For this let us +honour the kiwi, and hurl him in the face of the early risers. He stamps +about the ground in the dark night, and the worm, being naturally a +fool, as even the proverb demonstrates, comes up to investigate, and is +at once cured of early rising for ever. The kiwi, having no wings +(unless you count a bit of cartilage an inch or so long, buried under +the down), has the appearance of running about with his hands in his +pockets because of the cold. And being covered with something more like +hair than feathers, is a deal more like a big rat than a bird of any +sort. Indeed, I don't believe the kiwi himself has altogether made up +his mind which to be. Before he decides he will probably become extinct. +Any glimpse his friends have of him here is short. Suddenly brought out +into the day, he stands for a moment, and blinks; then he puts his beak +up and his legs apart, and there is a black streak and a heap of straw +where it vanishes. + +[Illustration] + +[Illustration] + +[Illustration] + + + + +_One and Two._ + +BY WALTER BESANT. + + +I. + +"Nell!" cried the boy, jumping about, unable to stand still for +excitement. "It is splendid! He has told me such things as I never +dreamed. Oh! splendid things! Wonderful things!" + +"Tell me, Will." + +"I am ashamed. Well, then, he says--he says"--the boy's face became +crimson--"he says that I can become whatever I please, if I please. It +is all in me--all--all! If I want to be a statesman--I may. If I want to +become a judge--I may. If I should like to be a bishop--I may. If a +great scholar--a great writer--I may. All, he says, is possible for me, +if I choose to work--all--if I choose to work. Oh! Nell--isn't it--isn't +it wonderful?" He dropped his voice, and his eyes glistened--his large +dreamy eyes--and his cheeks glowed. "If I choose to work. As if I should +not choose to work! Only those fellows who have got no such glorious +prospects are lazy. Work? Why, I am mad to work. I grudge every hour. +Work? You shall see how I will work!" + +[Illustration: "IT IS SPLENDID!"] + +He was a lad of seventeen, handsome, tall and straight; his eyes were +full and limpid; his face was a long oval, his mouth delicate and fine, +but perhaps not quite so firm as might have been desired. At this moment +he had just held a conference with his private tutor. It took the form +of a remonstrance and an explanation. The remonstrance pointed out that +his work was desultory and liable to be interrupted at any moment, for +any caprice: that steady grind was incompatible with the giving away of +whole mornings to musical dreams at the piano, or to rambles in the +woods, a book of poetry in hand. The explanation was to the effect that +the great prizes of the world are all within the reach of every clever +lad who starts with a sufficiency of means and is not afraid of work; +and that he himself--none other--possessed abilities which would justify +him in aiming at the very highest. But he must work: he must work: he +had been to no school and knew nothing of competitions with other +fellows: he must make up for that by hard grind. Think what it may mean +to a young fellow of imagination and of dreams, this throwing open of +the gates of the Temple of Ambition--this invitation to mount the steps +and enter that great and glittering dome. The temple, within, is all +glorious with crowns of gold set with precious stones and with crowns +of bay and laurel. Day and night ascends a hymn in praise of the living; +they themselves--the living who have succeeded--sit on thrones of carved +woodwork precious beyond price, and hear and receive this homage all day +long. This lad, only by looking in at the open doors, gasped, and +blushed, and panted; his colour came and went, his heart beat; he could +not stand still. + +His companion--they were in a country garden, and it was the spring of +the year--was a girl of fifteen, who hung upon his words and adored him. +Some women begin the voluntary servitude to the man they love at a very +early age indeed. Nelly at fifteen loved this boy of seventeen as much +as if they had both been ten years older. + +"Yes," she said, timidly, and the manner of her saying it betrayed +certain things. "And you will work, Will, won't you?" + +"Work? Nell, since your father has spoken those words of encouragement, +I feel that there is nothing but work left in me--regular +work--methodical, systematic work, you know. Grind, grind, grind! No +more music, no more singing, no more making rhymes--grind, grind, grind! +I say, Nell, I've always dreamed, you know----" + +"You have, Will." + +"And to find that things may actually come true--actually--the finest +things that ever I dared to dream--oh!" + +"It is wonderful, Will!" Both of them began to think that the finest +things had already been achieved. + +"It is like having your fortune doubled--trebled--multiplied by ten. +Better. If my fortune were multiplied by fifty I could spend no more, I +could eat no more, I believe I could do no more with it." + +"Genius," said the girl, blushing, because it really did seem an +original thing to say, "is better than riches." + +"It is, it is," the possessor of genius replied, with conviction. "To +have enough is to have all. I can, if I please, become a bishop, a +judge, a statesman--anything, anything. Nell," his voice dropped, "the +thought makes me tremble. I feel as if I shall not be equal to the +position. There is personal dignity, you know." + +The girl laughed. "You not equal, Will? Why, you are strong enough for +anything." + +"I have made up my mind what to do first of all. When I go to Cambridge +I shall take up classics. Of course I must take the highest classical +honours. I shall carry off all the University scholarships, and the +medals, and the prizes. Oh! and I must speak at the Union. I must lead +at the Union, and I must be an athlete." He was tall and thin, and he +stretched out his long arms. "I shall row in the boat--the 'Varsity +boat, of course. I shall play in the Eleven." + +"Oh, Will, you are too ambitious." + +"No man," he said, severely, "can be too ambitious. I would grasp all. I +must sweep the board." + +"And then?" + +"Ah! There, I have not yet decided. The Church, to raise the world. The +Law, to maintain the social order. The House, to rule the nation. +Literature, Science, Art--which?" + +"In whatever you do, Will, you are certain to rise to the front rank." + +"Certain. Your father says so. Oh! I feel as if I was already Leader of +the House. It is a splendid thing to rule the House. I feel as if I was +Lord Chancellor in my robes--on the woolsack. Nothing so grand as to be +Lord Chancellor. I feel as if I was Archbishop of Canterbury. It is a +most splendid thing, mind you, to be Archbishop of Canterbury. What +could be more splendid? He wears lawn sleeves, and he sits in the House +of Lords. But I must work. The road to all these splendid things, as +your father says, is through work. It wants an hour yet to dinner. I +will give that hour to Euripides. No more waste of time for me, Nell." + +He nodded his head and ran into the house, eager not to lose a moment. + +The girl looked after him admiringly and fondly. "Oh!" she murmured; +"what a splendid thing to be a man and to become Archbishop, and Lord +Chancellor, and Leader of the House! Oh! how clever he is, and how great +he will become!" + + * * * * * + +"I've had a serious talk with Challice to-day," said the private tutor +to his wife in the evening. + +"Will is _such_ a nice boy," said the wife. "What a pity that he won't +work!" + +"He's got enough money to begin with, and he has never been to a public +school. I have been firing his imagination, however, with the rich and +varied prospect before a boy who really will work and has brains. He is +a dreamer; he has vague ambitions; perhaps I may have succeeded in +fixing them. But who knows? He is a dreamer. He plays the piano and +listens to the music. Sometimes he makes verses. Who knows what such a +lad may do?" + + +II. + +Two years later, the same pair stood in the same place at the same +season of the year. Term was over--the third term of the first year at +Cambridge. + +"I haven't pleased your father," said the young man--he was slight and +boyish-looking still, but on his face there was a new stamp--he had +eaten of the tree of knowledge. "I have won no scholarships and taken no +prizes. My grand ideas about University laurels are changed. You see, +Nell, I have discovered that unless one goes into the Church a good +degree helps nobody. And, of course, it ruins a man in other ways to put +in all the time working for a degree." + +"You know," said Nell, "we don't think so here." + +"I know. Then you see I had to make the acquaintance of the men and to +show them that I was a person of--of some importance. A man who can play +and sing is always useful. We are an extremely social College, and +the--the friction of mind with mind, you know--it is the best education +possible for a man--I'm sure it is--much better than poring over Plato. +Then I found so many things in which I was deficient. French fiction, +for example; and I knew so very little about Art--oh! I have passed a +most busy and useful time." + +He forgot to mention such little things as nap, _ecarte_, loo, +billiards, Paris, and London, as forming part of his education. Yet +everybody will own that these are important elements in the forming of a +man. + +"I see," said Nell. + +"But your father won't. He is all for the Senate House. You do take a +little interest in me still, Nell? Just a little interest--in an old +friend?" + +"Of course I do, Will." She blushed and dropped her eyes. Their fingers +touched, but only for a moment. The touching of fingers is very +innocent. Perhaps it was accidental. + +[Illustration: "HE SPOKE VERY GRANDLY."] + +"Nell," said the young man, with deep feeling and earnestness, "whatever +I do--to whatever height I rise, I shall always feel"--here he stopped +because he could hardly say that she had stimulated him or inspired +him--"always feel, Nell, that it began here--it began here." He looked +about the garden. "On this spot I first resolved to become a great man. +It was on the very day when your father told me that I might be great if +I chose; of course, I knew so much before, but it pleased me; it +stimulated me. I told you here, on this spot, and you approved and +cheered me on. Well, I don't, of course, tell any of the men about my +ambitions. Mostly, I suppose, they have got their own. Some of them, I +know, don't soar above a country living--I laugh in my sleeve, Nell, +when I listen to their confessions--a country living--a house and a +garden and a church; that is a noble ambition, truly! I laugh, Nell, +when I think of what I could tell them; the rapid upward climb; the +dizzy height, the grasp of power and of authority!" + +He spoke very grandly, and waved his hand and threw his head back and +looked every inch a leader--one round whom the soldiers of a holy cause +would rally. The girl's eyes brightened and her cheek glowed, even +though she remembered what at that moment she would rather have +forgotten: the words of her father at breakfast. "Challice has done +nothing," he said, "he has attempted nothing; now he will never do +anything. It is just as I expected. A dreamer! A dreamer!" + +"It was here," Will continued, "that I resolved on greatness. It was on +this spot that I imparted my ambition to you. Nell, on this spot I again +impart to you my choice. I will become a great statesman. I have money +to start me--most fellows have to spend the best part of their lives in +getting money enough to give them a start. I shall be the Leader of the +House. Mind, to anyone but you this ambition would seem presumptuous. It +is my secret which I trust with you, Nell." He caught her hands, drew +her gently, and kissed her on the forehead. "Dear Nell," he said, "long +before my ambition is realized, you will be by my side, encouraging, and +advising, and consoling." + +He spoke as a young man should; and tenderly, as a lover should; but +there was something not right--a secret thorn--something jarred. In the +brave words--in the tender tones--there was a touch, a tone, a look, out +of harmony. Will Challice could not tell his mistress that all day long +there was a voice within him crying: "Work, work! Get up and work! All +this is folly! Work! Nothing can be done without work--work--work!" + + +III. + +It was about the beginning of the Michaelmas term that the very +remarkable occurrences or series of occurrences began which are the +cause and origin of this history. Many men have failed and many have +succeeded. Will Challice is, perhaps, the only man who has ever done +both, and in the same line and at the same time. The thing came upon him +quite suddenly and unexpectedly. It was at two in the morning; he had +spent the evening quietly in the society of three other men and two +packs of cards. His own rooms, he observed as he crossed the court, were +lit up--he wondered how his "gyp" could have been so careless. He opened +his door and entered his room. Heavens! At the table, on which the lamp +was burning, sat before a pile of books--himself! Challice rubbed his +eyes; he was not frightened; there is nothing to alarm a man in the +sight of himself, though sometimes a good deal to disgust; but if you +saw, in a looking-glass, your own face and figure doing _something +else_, you would be astonished: you might even be alarmed. Challice had +heard of men seeing rats, circles, triangles, even--he thought of his +misspent evenings which were by no means innocent of whisky and potash: +he concluded that this must be an Appearance, to be referred, like the +rats and circles, to strong drink. He thought that it would vanish as he +gazed. + +It did not: on the contrary, it became, if anything, clearer. There was +a reading lamp on the table which threw a strong circle of light upon +the bent head of the reader. Then Will Challice began to tremble and his +knees gave way. The clock ticked on the mantel-shelf: else there was no +sound: the College was wrapped and lapped in the silence of sleep. + +He nerved himself: he stepped forwards. "Speak," he cried, and the sound +of his own voice terrified him. Who ever heard of a man questioning +himself in the dead of night? "Speak--What does this mean?" + +[Illustration: "WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?"] + +Then the reader lifted his head, placed a book-mark to keep his place, +and turned slowly in his chair--one of those wooden chairs the seat of +which turns round. Yes--it was himself--his own face that met the face +of the returned reveller. But there was no terror in that face--a +serious resolve, rather--a set purpose--grave eyes. He, the reader, +leaned back in his chair and crossed his legs. + +"Yes," he said, and the voice again startled the other man. "You have a +right--a complete right--to an explanation. I have felt for a long time +that something would have to be done; I've been going on in a most +uncomfortable manner. In spite of my continual remonstrances, I _could_ +not persuade you to work. You must have recognised that you contained +two men: the one indolent, dreamy, always carried away by the pleasures +or caprice of the moment--a feather-brain. The other: ambitious, +clear-headed, and eager for work. Your part would give my part no +chance. Very well; we are partly separated. That is all. Partly +separated." + +The dreamer sat down and stared. "I don't understand," he said. + +"No more time will be lost," the worker went on. "I have begun to work. +For some time past I have been working at night--I am not going to stand +it any longer." + +"That's what made me so heavy in the morning, then?" + +"That was the cause. Now, however, I am going to work in earnest, and +all day long." + +"I don't care, if it's real; but this is a dream. I don't care so long +as I needn't work with you. But, I say, what will the men say? I can't +pretend to have a twin, all of a sudden." + +"N--no. Besides, there are other difficulties. We belong to each other, +you see. We must share these rooms. Listen, I have quite thought it out. +At night we shall be one; at breakfast and in the Hall we will be one; +you shall give me the entire use of these rooms all day and all the +evening for work. In examinations of course you will remain here locked +in, while I go to the Senate House. You will go to chapel for both." + +"N--no. Chapel must belong to you." + +"I say you will go to chapel for both." This with resolution. + +"Oh!" the other Half gave way, "But what am I to do all day?" + +"I'm sure I don't know. Do what you like. If you like to stay here you +can. You may play or sing. You may read your French novels; you will not +disturb me. But if you bring any of your friends here it will be +awkward, because they will perceive that you are double. Now we will go +to bed. It is half-past two." + + +IV. + +In the morning Will awoke with a strange sense of something. This +feeling of something is not uncommon with young gentlemen who go to bed +about three. He got up and dressed. A cup of tea made him remember but +imperfectly what had happened. "I must have had too much whisky," he +murmured. "I saw myself--actually myself--hard at work." Here his eyes +fell upon the table. There were the books--books on Political +Economy--with a note-book and every indication of work. More; he knew, +he remembered, the contents of these books. He sat down bewildered. Then +it seemed as if there was a struggle within him as of two who strove for +mastery. "Work!" cried one. "I won't," said the other. "You shall." "I +won't." A most ignoble quarrel, yet it pulled him this way and that +towards the table or back in the long easy chair. Finally the struggle +ended: he fell back; he closed his eyes. When he opened them again, the +room was cleared of the breakfast things, and he saw himself sitting at +the table hard at work. + +"Good gracious!" he cried, springing to his feet. "Is what I remember of +last night real? Not a dream!" + +"Not a dream at all. I will no longer have my career blasted at the +outset by your confounded laziness. I think you understand me perfectly. +I am clear of you whenever I please. I join you when I please." + +"Oh! And have I the same power?" + +"You? Certainly not. You are only the Half that won't work. You have got +no power at all." + +"Oh! Well--I shall not stand that." + +"You can't help yourself. I am the Intellectual Principle; mine is the +Will: mine is the clear head and the authority." + +"What am I, then?" + +"You? I don't know. You are me--yourself--without the Intellectual +Principle. That is what you are. I must define you by negatives. You +cannot argue, or reason, or create, or invent: you remember like an +animal from assistance: you behave nicely because you have been trained: +you are--in short--you are the Animal Part." + +"Oh!" He was angry: he did not know what to reply: he was humiliated. + +"Don't fall into a rage. Go away and amuse yourself. You can do anything +you please. Come back, however, in time for Hall." + +The Animal Part obeyed. He went out leaving the other Part over his +books. He spent the morning with other men as industriously disposed as +himself. He found a strange lightness of spirits. There was no +remonstrating voice within him reproaching him for his laziness, urging +him to get up and go to work. Not at all; that voice was silent; he was +left quite undisturbed. He talked with these men over tobacco; he played +billiards with them; he lay in a chair and looked at a novel. He had +luncheon and beer, and more tobacco. He went down the river in the +college boat; he had an hour or two of whist before Hall. Then he +returned to his room. + +His other Half looked up, surprised. + +"Already? The day has flown." + +"One moment," said Will, "before we go in. You're a serious sort, you +know, and I'm one of the--the lighter ornaments of the College, and I +sit among them. It would be awkward breaking off all at once. +Besides----" + +"I understand. Continue to sit with them for awhile, and talk as much +idiotic stuff as you please. Presently you will find that a change of +companions and of conversation has become necessary." + +Nobody noticed any change; the two in one sat at table and ate like one; +they talked like one; they talked frivolously, telling stories like one. +After Hall they went back to their chambers. + +"You can leave me," said the student. "I shall rest for an hour or so. +Then I shall go on again." + +This very remarkable arrangement went on undisturbed for some time. No +one suspected it. No one discovered it. It became quite natural for +Challice to go out of his room in the morning and to leave himself at +work; it became natural to go down to Hall at seven with a mingled +recollection of work and amusements. The reproaching voice was silent, +the Animal Part was left at peace, and the Intellectual Part went on +reading at peace. + +[Illustration: "WILL MET THE TUTOR."] + +One evening, however, going across the court at midnight, Will met the +tutor. + +"Challice," he said, "is it wise to burn the candle at both ends? +Come--you told me this morning that you were working hard. What do you +call this? You cannot serve two masters." + +"It is quite true," said the Reading Half on being questioned. "I have +foreseen this difficulty for some time. I called on the tutor this +morning, and I told him of my intention to work. He laughed aloud. I +insisted. Then he pointed out the absurdity of pretending to work while +one was idling about all day. This is awkward." + +"What do you propose then?" + +"I propose that you stay indoors all the morning until two o'clock, +locked in." + +"What? And look on while you are mugging?" + +"Exactly. You may read French novels: you may go to sleep. You must be +quiet. Only, you must be here--all the morning. In the afternoon you may +do what you please. I may quite trust you to avoid any effort of the +brain. Oh! And you will avoid anything stronger than tea before Hall. No +more beer for lunch. It makes me heavy." + +"No more beer? But this is tyranny." + +"No. It is ambition. In the evening you may go out and play cards. I +shall stay here." + +They went to bed. It seemed to Will as if the other Part of him--the +Intellectual Part--ordered him to go to sleep without further thought. + +This curious life of separation and of partial union continued, in fact, +for the whole of the undergraduate time. Gradually, however, a great +change came over the lazy Half--the Animal Half. It--he--perceived that +the whole of his reasoning powers had become absorbed by the +Intellectual Half. He became really incapable of reasoning. He could not +follow out a thought; he had no thoughts. This made him seem dull, +because even the most indolent person likes to think that he has some +powers of argument. This moiety of Challice had none. He became quite +dull; his old wit deserted him; he was heavy; he drifted gradually out +of the society which he had formerly frequented; he perceived that his +old friends not only found him dull, but regarded him as a traitor. He +had become, they believed, that contemptible person, the man who reads. +He was no longer a dweller in the Castle of Indolence; he had gone over +to the other side. + +Life became very dull indeed to this Half. He got into the habit of +lying on a sofa, watching the other Half who sat at the table tearing +the heart out of books. He admired the energy of that Half; for himself, +he could do nothing; if he read at all it was a novel of the lowest +kind; he even bought the penny novelette and read that with interest; if +he came to a passage which contained a thought or a reflection he passed +it over. He had ceased to think; he no longer even troubled himself +about losing the power of thought. + +Another thing came upon him; not suddenly, but gradually, so that he was +not alarmed at it. He began to care no longer about the games of which +he had formerly been so fond. Billiards, racquets, cards, all require, +you see, a certain amount of reasoning, of quick intelligence and rapid +action. This unfortunate young man had no rapidity of intelligence left. +He was too stupid to play games. He became too stupid even to row. + +He ceased to be a dreamer; all his dreams were gone; he ceased to make +music at the piano; he ceased to sing; he could neither play nor sing: +these things gave him no pleasure. He ceased, in short, to take interest +in anything, cared for nothing, and hoped for nothing. + +In Hall the two in one sat now with the reading set. Their talk was all +of books and "subjects," and so forth. The Intellectual Half held his +own with the rest: nay, he became a person to be considered. It was +remarked, however, that any who met Challice out walking found him +stupid and dull beyond belief. This was put down to preoccupation. The +man was full of his work; he was meditating, they said, his brain was +working all the while; he was making up for lost time. + +In the evening the lazy Half sat in an easy chair and took tobacco, +while the other Half worked. At eleven the Industrious Half disappeared. +Then the Whole went to bed. + +They seldom spoke except when Industry had some more orders to give. It +was no longer advice, or suggestion, or a wish, or a prayer: it was an +order. Indolence was a servant. "You took more wine than is good for me +at dinner to-day," said Industry. "Restrict yourself to a pint of +claret, and that of the lightest, for the future." Or, "You are not +taking exercise enough. If you have no longer brain power enough even +for the sliding seat, walk--walk fast--go out to the top of the Gogs and +back again. I want all my energies." Once Indolence caught a cold: it +was a month before the May examinations. The wrath and reproaches of +Industry, compelled to give up a whole day to nursing that cold, were +very hard to bear. Yet Indolence could not resist; he could not even +remonstrate; he was now a mere slave. + +When the examinations came it was necessary to observe precautions of a +severer kind. To begin with, Indolence had to get up at six and go for +an hour's run, for the better bracing of the nerves; he had to stay +hidden indoors all day, while his ambitious twin sat in the Hall, +flooring papers. He had to give up tobacco in order to keep the other +Half's head clear. "Courage," said Intellect, "a day or two more and you +shall plunge again into the sensuality of your pipe and your beer. +Heavens! When I look at you, and think of what I was becoming!" + +Industry got a scholarship; Intellect got a University medal; Ambition +received the congratulations of the tutor. + +"How long," asked the Animal, "is this kind of thing going to continue?" + +"How long? Do you suppose," replied the other Half, "that I have given +up my ambition? Remember what you said two years ago. You were younger +then. You would sweep the board; you would row in the University boat; +you would play in the Eleven; you would be a Leader--in all, all! You +would then take up with something--you knew not what--and you would step +to the front. You remember?" + +"A dream--a dream. I was younger then." + +"No longer a dream. It is a settled purpose. Hear me. I am going to be +a statesman. I shall play the highest game of all. I shall go into the +House. I shall rise--slowly at first, but steadily." + +"And I?" + +"You are a log tied to my heel, but you shall be an obedient log. If you +were not--" + +Indolence shivered and crouched. "Am I then--all my life--to be your +servant?" + +[Illustration: "INDOLENCE SHIVERED."] + +"Your life? No--my life." The two glared at each other. "Silence, Log. +Let me work." + +"I shall not be silent," cried Indolence, roused to momentary +self-assertion. "I have no enjoyment left in life. You have taken +all--all--" + +"You have left what you loved best of all--your sloth. Lie down--and +take your rest. Why, you do nothing all day. A stalled ox is not more +lazy. You eat and drink and take exercise and sleep. What more, for such +as you, has life to give? You are now an animal. My half has absorbed +all the intellectual part of you. Lie down, I say--lie down, and let me +work." + +The Animal could not lie down. He was restless. He walked about the +room. He was discontented. He was jealous. The other Half, he saw +plainly, was getting the better share of things. That Half was admired +and envied. By accident, as he paced the room, he looked in the glass; +and he started, for his face had grown heavy: there was a bovine look +about the cheeks: the eyes were dull: the mouth full. Then the other +Half rose and stood beside him. Together they looked at their own faces. +"Ha!" cried Ambition, well satisfied at the contrast. "It works already. +Mine is the face intended for me: yours is the face into which this +degenerate mould might sink. Mine contains the soul; yours--the animal. +You have got what you wanted, Sloth. Your dreams are gone from you. I +have got them, though, and I am turning them into action. As time goes +on, your face will become more bovine, your eyes duller. What will be +the end?" His brow darkened. "I don't know. We are like the Siamese +twins." + +"One of them took to drink," murmured the inferior Half. "What if I were +to follow his example?" + +"You will not. You do not dare?" But his blanched face showed his terror +at the very thought. + + +V. + +The first step was achieved. The first class was gained. Challice of +Pembroke was second classic; he might have been senior but for the +unaccountable laziness of his first year. He was University scholar, +medallist, prizeman; he was one of the best speakers at the Union. He +was known to be ambitious. He was not popular, however, because he was +liable to strange fits of dulness; those who met him wandering about the +banks of the river found him apparently unable to understand things; at +such times he looked heavy and dull; it was supposed that he was +abstracted; men respected his moods, but these things do not increase +friendships. Challice the Animal and Challice the Intellect weighed each +other down. + +They left Cambridge, they went to London, they took lodgings. "You are +now so different from me in appearance," said the Intellect, "that I +think we may leave off the usual precautions. Go about without troubling +what I am and what I am doing. Go about and amuse yourself, but be +careful." + +The victim of sloth obeyed; he went about all day long in heavy, +meaningless fashion; he looked at things in shops; he sat in museums, +and dropped off to sleep. He strolled round squares. At luncheon and +dinner time he found out restaurants where he could feed--in reality, +the only pleasure left to him was to eat, drink, and sleep. + +One day he was in Kensington Gardens, sitting half asleep in the sun. +People walked up and down the walk before him; beautiful women gaily +dressed; sprightly women gaily talking; the world of wealth, fashion, +extravagance, and youth. He was no more than three-and-twenty himself. +He ought to have been fired by the sight of all this beauty, and all +this happiness. Nobody in the world can look half so happy as a lovely +girl finely dressed. But he sat there like a clod, dull and insensate. + +Presently, a voice which he remembered: "Papa, it is Will Challice!" He +looked up heavily. "Why, Will," the girl stood before him, "don't you +know me?" + +[Illustration: "PAPA, IT IS WILL CHALLICE!"] + +It was Nell, the daughter of his tutor, now a comely maiden of +one-and-twenty, who laughed and held out her hand to him He rose, but +not with alacrity. The shadow of a smile crossed his face. He took her +hand. + +"Challice!" his tutor clapped him on the shoulder. "I haven't seen you +since you took your degree. Splendid, my boy! But it might have been +better. I hear you are reading Law--good. With the House before you? +Good again! Let me look at you. Humph!" He grunted a little +disappointment. "You don't look quite so--quite so--what? Do you take +exercise enough?" + +"Plenty of exercise--plenty," replied the young scholar, who looked so +curiously dull and heavy. + +"Well, let us walk together. You are doing nothing for the moment." + +They walked together; Nelly between them. + +"Father," she said, when they arrived at their lodgings in Albemarle +Street, "what has come over that poor man? He has gone stupid with his +success. I could not get a word out of him. He kept staring at me +without speaking." + +Was he a lumpish log, or was he a man all nerves and electricity? + +In the morning Will Challice partly solved the question, because he +called and showed clearly that he was an insensible log and a lumpish +log. He sat for an hour gazing at the girl as if he would devour her, +but he said nothing. + +In the evening Cousin Tom called, bringing Will Challice again--but how +changed! Was such a change really due to evening dress? Keen of feature, +bright of eye, full of animation. "Why, Will," said Nelly, "what is the +matter with you sometimes? When you were here this morning, one could +not get a word out of you. Your very face looked heavy." + +He changed colour. "I have times when I--I--lose +myself--thinking--thinking of things, you know." + +They passed a delightful evening. But when Will went away, the girl +became meditative. For, although he had talked without stopping, on +every kind of subject, there was no hungry look in his eye, such as she +had perceived with natural satisfaction in the morning. Every maiden +likes that look of hunger, outward sign and indication of respect to her +charms. + +They were up in town for a month. Every morning Will called and sat glum +but hungry-eyed, gazing on the girl and saying nothing. Every evening he +called again and talked scholarship and politics with her father, his +face changed, his whole manner different, and without any look of +hunger in his eyes. + +[Illustration: "WILL SAT GAZING ON THE GIRL."] + +One day after a fortnight or so of this, Will the Animal stood up after +breakfast and spoke. + +"There has got to be a change." + +"You are changing, in fact," replied the other with a sneer. + +"I am in love. I am going to marry a girl. Now hold your tongue," for +the Intellectual Half bounded in his chair. "You have left me very +little power of speech. Let me try to explain what I--I want to say." He +spoke painfully and slowly. "Let me--try--I have lost, bit by bit, +almost everything. I don't want to read--I can't play any more. I don't +care about anything much. But this girl I do care about. I have always +loved her, and you--you with your deuced intellect--cannot kill that +part of me. Be quiet--let me try to think. She loves me, too. She loves +me for myself, and not on account of you and your success. She is sorry +for me. She has given me--I don't know how--the power of thinking a +little. When I am married to her, she will give me more. Let us part +absolutely. Take all my intellect and go. Nell will marry a stupid man, +but he will get something from her--something I am sure. I feel +different already; I said something to-day which made her laugh. What +are you glaring at me for?" + +"I am not glaring. I am thinking. Go on." + +"This has got to stop. Now find some way of stopping it, or--or--" + +"What can you do?" + +"I can drink," he said, with awful meaning. "I can ruin you. And I will, +unless you agree to part." + +The Intellectual Half was looking at him with a strangely softened face. +There was neither scorn nor hatred in that face. "Dimidium Animae," he +said, "Half of my Soul, I have something to say as well. Confess, +however, first of all, that I was right. Had it not been for this +step--the most severe measure possible, I admit--nothing would have been +achieved. Eh?" + +"Perhaps. You _would_ work, you see." + +"Yes. Well--I have made a discovery. It is that I have been too +thorough. I don't quite understand how, logically and naturally, +anything else was possible. I wanted, heaven knows, all the intellect +there was; you were, therefore, bound to become the Animal, pure and +simple. Well, you see, we are not really two, but one. Can't we hit upon +an agreement?" + +"What agreement?" + +"Some agreement--some _modus vivendi_. I shall get, it is true, some of +the Animal; you will get some of the Intellectual, but we shall be +united again, and after all----" He looked very kindly upon himself, and +held out his hand. So they stood with clasped hands looking at each +other. + +"I found it out through Nell," the Intellectual Half went on. "You went +to see her every morning--I went every evening. You were always brimful +of love for her; I, who knew this, was not moved in the slightest degree +by her. Oh! I know that she is the best girl that the world, at this +moment, has to show; I am fully persuaded of that: yet she has ceased to +move me. I think of her Intellect, which is certainly much lower than my +own, and I cannot even admire her. In other words, I cannot be moved by +any woman. This terrifies me." + +"Why?" + +"It threatens my future. Don't you see? He who cannot be moved by woman +is no longer man. But man can only be moved by brother man. If I cannot +move men my career is at an end. What they call magnetism belongs to the +animal within us. When that is gone, I now perceive, when the animal is +killed, the rest of the man has no longer any charm, any attraction, any +persuasion, any power of leading, teaching, compelling, or guiding. His +success, whatever he does, is all glitter--evanescent glitter. He may +sit down and hold his tongue, for he can do no more good." + +"I only half understand." + +"Intellect, in short, my lower Half, is of no use without human passion. +That is what it means. We have gone too far. Let us end it." + +"How? You despise the man who is only animal." + +"No--no! The animal is part of man. I understand now. I have done +wrong--brother Half--to separate myself so much from you. Only, you +carried it too far. You _would_ not work: you would not give me even a +decent show. Suppose--I say suppose--we were united once more. Could I +count on being allowed to work?" + +"Yes," said the Animal, "I have had a lesson too. You shall work," he +hesitated and shuddered, "in reason, of course--say all the morning, +and, if you go into the House, all the evening." + +"I would not be hard upon you. I would let you have a reasonable amount +of indolence and rest. My success will be less rapid, on your account, +but it will be more solid. Do you think that if we were to be lost again +in each other, I should once more feel for that girl as--" + +"Why," said the Animal, "you would be--Me; and what I feel for her is, I +assure you, overwhelming." + +That evening Will Challice sat at the open window in the dark, Nellie's +hand in his. "My dear," he murmured, "tell me, do you love me more +because I have realized some of our old dreams?" + +"Will; how can I tell you? I love you, not your success. If you had not +done so well, it would have made no difference. Your success is only an +accidental part of you." Oh! the metaphysician! "You are not your +success. Yet, of course, I don't love you for your fine degree, you +conceited boy, and yet it is for yourself." + +He kissed her forehead. "The old dream time was pleasant, wasn't it? +when we chose to be Archbishop of Canterbury one day and Lord Chancellor +the next. To be Leader of the House of Commons is the present ambition. +It is a most splendid thing"--the dreamer's eyes looked up into space +with the old light in them--"a most splendid thing--to lead the +House--to sway the House. But I don't know," he sighed, "it will take an +awful lot of work. And the Cambridge business did take it out of one +most tremendously. I didn't believe, Nell, that I had such an amount of +work in me." + +"You have been so gloomy lately, Will. Was that fatigue?" + +[Illustration: "HE KISSED HER FOREHEAD."] + +"Ambition on the brain, Nell," he replied, lightly--as lightly as of +old--success had not destroyed the old gaiety of heart. "I've consulted +a learned physician, Dr. Sydenham Celsus Galen, Wimpole Street. He says +that an engagement with the right girl--he is extremely particular on +that point, so that I do hope, Nell, we have made no mistake--is a +sovereign remedy for all mopey, glum, dumpsy, moody, broody, gloomy, +sulky, ill-conditioned vapours. It is, he confessed, the only medicine +in his pharmacopoeia. All his clients have to follow that +prescription. You will very soon find that those glum, dumpsy moods have +vanished quite away. You will charm them away. Oh! I live again--I +breathe--I think--I don't work so infernally hard--I am once more +human--because I love, and because--" The girl's head rested upon his +arm, and he kissed her forehead. + + + + +_Portraits of Celebrities at Different Times of their Lives._ + + +W. CLARK RUSSELL. + +BORN 1844. + +[Illustration: AGE 5 (_From an Oil Painting_)] + +[Illustration: AGE 17.(From a Photograph.) + +(_As a Midshipman._)] + +[Illustration: PRESENT DAY. (_From a Photo by Elliott & Fry._)] + +Mr. Clark Russell was born in New York of English parents. His literary +taste is a natural gift, his mother being a niece of Charles Lloyd, the +poet, and a cousin of Christopher Wordsworth, the late Bishop of +Lincoln, and herself known as a poetess, and the authoress, among other +things, of "The Wife's Dream." Mr. Clark Russell went to sea as a middy +before he was fourteen, and during the next eight years picked up the +thorough knowledge of seafaring life which he afterwards turned to such +good use in his novels. His first book was "John Holdsworth," but it was +his second story, "The Wreck of the Grosvenor," which he wrote in little +more than two months and sold to a publisher for fifty pounds, which +marked a new era in the evolution of the nautical novel. Since that time +Mr. Clark Russell has had the sea to himself, and his descriptions of +sea-scenery, and his pictures of real-life sailors, are not likely soon +to find a rival. Mr. Clark Russell's latest story, "List, Ye +Landsmen"--one of his very best--is now appearing in _Tit-Bits_. + + +PRINCESS MARIE OF EDINBURGH. + +BORN 1875. + +[Illustration: AGE 5. + +_From a Photo. by W. & D. Downey._] + +[Illustration: AGE 12. _From a Photo. by W. & D. Downey._] + +[Illustration: PRESENT DAY. (_From a Photo. by Heath, Plymouth._)] + +The marriage of Princess Marie, the eldest daughter of the Duke and +Duchess of Edinburgh, to Prince Ferdinand of Roumania, which is fixed to +take place on January the 10th, will almost coincide with the appearance +of these portraits of the young Princess at different ages. A more +charming set we have never had the privilege of publishing. + +In offering our sincere congratulations and best wishes to the youthful +pair, we are sure that every reader of THE STRAND MAGAZINE will +cordially join us. + + +PRINCE FERDINAND OF ROUMANIA. + +BORN 1865. + +[Illustration: AGE 6. _From a Photo. by Haarstick, Duesseldorf._] + +[Illustration: AGE 17. _From a Photo. by Mandy, Bucharest._] + +[Illustration: AGE 21. _From a Photo. by Mandy, Bucharest._] + +[Illustration: PRESENT DAY. _From a Photo. by Mandy, Bucharest._] + +Prince Ferdinand of Roumania, second son of the reigning Prince Leopold +of Hohenzollern and Princess Antonia, Infanta of Portugal, was born in +Sigmaringen on the 24th of August, 1865. After several years of private +tuition under the parental care, he joined, together with his brothers, +the gymnasium of Duesseldorf. He was appointed by the Emperor William a +lieutenant in the Infantry Life Guards. He then joined the military +school at Kassel, and after a regular course of studies, obtained his +commission as officer in the army. In November, 1886, he went to +Bucharest with his father, and after participating in a brilliant +review, was nominated by King Charles I. a lieutenant in the 3rd +Infantry Regiment. On the 14th of March, 1889, he was proclaimed Heir +Presumptive to the Crown of Roumania by the unanimous vote of the +Senate. + + +THE LATE MR. FRED. LESLIE. + +BORN 1855. + +[Illustration: AGE 8. _From a Photograph._] + +[Illustration: AGE 14. _From a Photo. by Eugene Carpot._] + +[Illustration: AGE 26. _From a Photo. by the London Stereo. Co._] + +[Illustration: AGE 37. _As a Servant in "Cinder-Ellen," played by him on +November 25th, 1892, his last appearance before his death._] + +[Illustration: AGE 37. _From a Photo by The London Stereo Co._] + +After leaving Dr. Quine's school at Notting Hill, Mr. Leslie passed a +short probation in the provinces, and joined the Royalty Theatre in +1872, making his _debut_ on the London stage in the character of +_Colonel Hardy_ in "Paul Pry." He subsequently visited America to play +in "Madame Favart," at the Fifth Avenue Theatre. On his return to London +he created the character of the _Duke_ in "Olivette." Shortly after +this, in 1882, in the title role of "Rip Van Winkle" at the Comedy, he +came prominently into public notice. In this character he proved himself +a worthy disciple of Joseph Jefferson. Then came a second visit to +America, from which Mr. Leslie returned after a year to fill his old +part when "Rip Van Winkle" was again revived. Early in the spring of +1885 he moved to the Opera Comique, and in the December of that year +joined the Gaiety Company, in which his loss will be very severely felt. +As a dramatic author he wrote under the name of A. C. Torr, a derivation +from the word "Actor." + + +MISS DOROTHEA GERARD + +(MADAME LONGARD) + +[Illustration: AGE 4. _From a Photo. by Robertson, Glasgow._] + +[Illustration: AGE 6. _From a Photo._] + +[Illustration: AGE 11. _From a Photo. by Bude, Gratz._] + +[Illustration: AGE 21. _From a Photo. by Scheffter, Szabadka._] + +[Illustration: PRESENT DAY. _From a Photo. by Mackintosh, Kelso._] + +Dorothea Mary Stanislaus Margaret Gerard, born August 9th, 1855, at +Rochsoles House, Lanarkshire, N.B. The following is a brief +autobiography of this well-known and popular novelist, with which she +has been good enough to supply us: "My father's name was Archibald +Gerard. My mother was _nee_ Euphemia Erskine Robison. In 1876, being in +a deadly dull Hungarian country town, my eldest sister (Madame de +Laszowska) and I took to writing in despair, conjointly, and merely as a +means of passing the time, signing ourselves 'E. D. Gerard.' +Considerably to our astonishment we found a publisher for our first +attempt--'Reata.' This was followed by 'Beggar My Neighbour' and 'The +Waters of Hercules' (all three published by Messrs. Blackwood), after +which our literary partnership ceased. Since then I have written 'Lady +Baby' and 'Recha' (Blackwood), and 'Orthodox' (first appeared in +'Longman's Magazine'), and now 'A Queen of Curds and Cream' (Messrs. +Eden and Co.), all these under the signature 'Dorothea Gerard.' On April +17th, 1887, I was married to Captain (now Lieut.-Colonel) Julius +Longard, of the 7th Austrian Lancers." + + +THE RIGHT HON. STUART KNILL, + +LORD MAYOR. BORN 1824. + +[Illustration: AGE 12. From a Miniature.] + +[Illustration: AS ALDERMAN AND SHERIFF. From a Photograph by the London +Stereoscopic Co.] + +[Illustration: AGE 38. From a Photograph.] + +[Illustration: PRESENT DAY AS LORD MAYOR. From a Photograph by the +London Stereoscopic Co.] + + +Mr. Stuart Knill, whose election to the Mayoralty this year was invested +with unusual interest, is the son of the late Mr. John Knill, of Fresh +Wharf, London Bridge, to whose business he succeeded. He was educated at +the Blackheath Proprietary School, and at the University of Bonn. He +entered the Corporation in 1885 as Alderman of the Ward of Bridge, and +served the office of Sheriff in 1889-90. He is a member of the +Goldsmiths' Company, and is now Master of the Guild of Plumbers for the +second time. In this capacity he has taken great interest in all matters +connected with sanitation and hygiene. He is a leading member of the +Roman Catholic laity in England. + + + + +_The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes._ + +XIV.--THE ADVENTURE OF THE CARDBOARD BOX. + +BY CONAN DOYLE. + + +In choosing a few typical cases which illustrate the remarkable mental +qualities of my friend, Sherlock Holmes, I have endeavoured, as far as +possible, to select those which presented the minimum of sensationalism, +while offering a fair field for his talents. It is, however, +unfortunately, impossible to entirely separate the sensational from the +criminal, and a chronicler is left in the dilemma that he must either +sacrifice details which are essential to his statement, and so give a +false impression of the problem, or he must use matter which chance, and +not choice, has provided him with. With this short preface I shall turn +to my notes of what proved to be a strange, though a peculiarly +terrible, chain of events. + +It was a blazing hot day in August. Baker Street was like an oven, and +the glare of the sunlight upon the yellow brickwork of the houses across +the road was painful to the eye. It was hard to believe that these were +the same walls which loomed so gloomily through the fogs of winter. Our +blinds were half-drawn, and Holmes lay curled upon the sofa, reading and +rereading a letter which he had received by the morning post. For +myself, my term of service in India had trained me to stand heat better +than cold, and a thermometer at 90 was no hardship. But the morning +paper was uninteresting. Parliament had risen. Everybody was out of +town, and I yearned for the glades of the New Forest or the shingle of +Southsea. A depleted bank account had caused me to postpone my holiday, +and as to my companion, neither the country nor the sea presented the +slightest attraction to him. He loved to lie in the very centre of five +millions of people, with his filaments stretching out and running +through them, responsive to every little rumour or suspicion of unsolved +crime. Appreciation of Nature found no place among his many gifts, and +his only change was when he turned his mind from the evil-doer of the +town to track down his brother of the country. + +[Illustration: "I FELL INTO A BROWN STUDY."] + +Finding that Holmes was too absorbed for conversation I had tossed aside +the barren paper and, leaning back in my chair, I fell into a brown +study. Suddenly my companion's voice broke in upon my thoughts. + +"You are right, Watson," said he. "It does seem a most preposterous way +of settling a dispute." + +"Most preposterous!" I exclaimed, and then suddenly realizing how he had +echoed the inmost thought of my soul, I sat up in my chair and stared at +him in blank amazement. + +"What is this, Holmes?" I cried. "This is beyond anything which I could +have imagined." + +He laughed heartily at my perplexity. + +"You remember," said he, "that some little time ago when I read you the +passage in one of Poe's sketches in which a close reasoner follows the +unspoken thoughts of his companion, you were inclined to treat the +matter as a mere _tour-de-force_ of the author. On my remarking that I +was constantly in the habit of doing the same thing you expressed +incredulity." + +"Oh, no!" + +"Perhaps not with your tongue, my dear Watson, but certainly with your +eyebrows. So when I saw you throw down your paper and enter upon a train +of thought, I was very happy to have the opportunity of reading it off, +and eventually of breaking into it, as a proof that I had been in +rapport with you." + +But I was still far from satisfied. "In the example which you read to +me," said I, "the reasoner drew his conclusions from the actions of the +man whom he observed. If I remember right, he stumbled over a heap of +stones, looked up at the stars, and so on. But I have been seated +quietly in my chair, and what clues can I have given you?" + +"You do yourself an injustice. The features are given to man as the +means by which he shall express his emotions, and yours are faithful +servants." + +"Do you mean to say that you read my train of thoughts from my +features?" + +"Your features, and especially your eyes. Perhaps you cannot yourself +recall how your reverie commenced?" + +"No, I cannot." + +"Then I will tell you. After throwing down your paper, which was the +action which drew my attention to you, you sat for half a minute with a +vacant expression. Then your eyes fixed themselves upon your +newly-framed picture of General Gordon, and I saw by the alteration in +your face that a train of thought had been started. But it did not lead +very far. Your eyes flashed across to the unframed portrait of Henry +Ward Beecher which stands upon the top of your books. You then glanced +up at the wall, and of course your meaning was obvious. You were +thinking that if the portrait were framed, it would just cover that bare +space and correspond with Gordon's picture over there." + +"You have followed me wonderfully!" I exclaimed. + +"So far I could hardly have gone astray. But now your thoughts went back +to Beecher, and you looked hard across as if you were studying the +character in his features. Then your eyes ceased to pucker, but you +continued to look across, and your face was thoughtful. You were +recalling the incidents of Beecher's career. I was well aware that you +could not do this without thinking of the mission which he undertook on +behalf of the North at the time of the Civil War, for I remember your +expressing your passionate indignation at the way in which he was +received by the more turbulent of our people. You felt so strongly about +it, that I knew you could not think of Beecher without thinking of that +also. When a moment later I saw your eyes wander away from the picture, +I suspected that your mind had now turned to the Civil War, and when I +observed that your lips set, your eyes sparkled, and your hands +clenched, I was positive that you were indeed thinking of the gallantry +which was shown by both sides in that desperate struggle. But then, +again, your face grew sadder; you shook your head. You were dwelling +upon the sadness and horror and useless waste of life. Your hand stole +towards your own old wound and a smile quivered on your lips, which +showed me that the ridiculous side of this method of settling +international questions had forced itself upon your mind. At this point +I agreed with you that it was preposterous, and was glad to find that +all my deductions had been correct." + +"Absolutely!" said I. "And now that you have explained it, I confess +that I am as amazed as before." + +"It was very superficial, my dear Watson, I assure you. I should not +have intruded it upon your attention had you not shown some incredulity +the other day. But I have in my hands here a little problem which may +prove to be more difficult of solution than my small essay in thought +reading. Have you observed in the paper a short paragraph referring to +the remarkable contents of a packet sent through the post to Miss Susan +Cushing, of Cross Street, Croydon?" + +"No, I saw nothing." + +"Ah! then you must have overlooked it. Just toss it over to me. Here it +is, under the financial column. Perhaps you would be good enough to read +it aloud." + +I picked up the paper which he had thrown back to me, and read the +paragraph indicated. It was headed, "A Gruesome Packet." + +"Miss Susan Cushing, living at Cross Street, Croydon, has been made the +victim of what must be regarded as a peculiarly revolting practical +joke, unless some more sinister meaning should prove to be attached to +the incident. At two o'clock yesterday afternoon a small packet, wrapped +in brown paper, was handed in by the postman. A cardboard box was +inside, which was filled with coarse salt. On emptying this, Miss +Gushing was horrified to find two human ears, apparently quite freshly +severed. The box had been sent by parcel post from Belfast upon the +morning before. There is no indication as to the sender, and the matter +is the more mysterious as Miss Cushing, who is a maiden lady of fifty, +has led a most retired life, and has so few acquaintances or +correspondents that it is a rare event for her to receive anything +through the post. Some years ago, however, when she resided at Penge, +she let apartments in her house to three young medical students, whom +she was obliged to get rid of on account of their noisy and irregular +habits. The police are of opinion that this outrage may have been +perpetrated upon Miss Cushing by these youths, who owed her a grudge, +and who hoped to frighten her by sending her these relics of the +dissecting-rooms. Some probability is lent to the theory by the fact +that one of these students came from the north of Ireland, and, to the +best of Miss Cushing's belief, from Belfast. In the meantime, the matter +is being actively investigated, Mr. Lestrade, one of the very smartest +of our detective officers, being in charge of the case." + +"So much for the _Daily Chronicle_" said Holmes, as I finished reading. +"Now for our friend Lestrade. I had a note from him this morning, in +which he says: 'I think that this case is very much in your line. We +have every hope of clearing the matter up, but we find a little +difficulty in getting anything to work upon. We have, of course, wired +to the Belfast post-office, but a large number of parcels were handed in +upon that day, and they have no means of identifying this particular +one, or of remembering the sender. The box is a half-pound box of +honeydew tobacco, and does not help us in any way. The medical student +theory still appears to me to be the most feasible, but if you should +have a few hours to spare, I should be very happy to see you out here. I +shall be either at the house or in the police-station all day.' What say +you, Watson? Can you rise superior to the heat, and run down to Croydon +with me on the off chance of a case for your annals?" + +"I was longing for something to do." + +"You shall have it, then. Ring for our boots, and tell them to order a +cab. I'll be back in a moment, when I have changed my dressing-gown and +filled my cigar-case." + +A shower of rain fell while we were in the train, and the heat was far +less oppressive in Croydon than in town. Holmes had sent on a wire, so +that Lestrade, as wiry, as dapper, and as ferret-like as ever, was, +waiting for us at the station. A walk of five minutes took us to Cross +Street, where Miss Cushing resided. + +[Illustration: "MISS CUSHING."] + +It was a very long street of two-story brick houses, neat and prim, with +whitened stone steps and little groups of aproned women gossiping at +the doors. Half-way down, Lestrade stopped and tapped at a door, which +was opened by a small servant girl. Miss Cushing was sitting in the +front room, into which we were ushered. She was a placid-faced woman +with large, gentle eyes, and grizzled hair curving down over her temples +on each side. A worked antimacassar lay upon her lap and a basket of +coloured silks stood upon a stool beside her. + +"They are in the outhouse, those dreadful things," said she, as Lestrade +entered. "I wish that you would take them away altogether." + +"So I shall, Miss Cushing. I only kept them here until my friend, Mr. +Holmes, should have seen them in your presence." + +"Why in my presence, sir?" + +"In case he wished to ask any questions." + +"What is the use of asking me questions, when I tell you that I know +nothing whatever about it?" + +"Quite so, madam," said Holmes, in his soothing way. "I have no doubt +that you have been annoyed more than enough already over this business." + +"Indeed, I have, sir. I am a quiet woman and live a retired life. It is +something new for me to see my name in the papers and to find the police +in my house. I won't have those things in here, Mr. Lestrade. If you +wish to see them you must go to the outhouse." + +It was a small shed in the narrow garden which ran down behind the +house. Lestrade went in and brought out a yellow cardboard box, with a +piece of brown paper and some string. There was a bench at the edge of +the path, and we all sat down while Holmes examined, one by one, the +articles which Lestrade had handed to him. + +"The string is exceedingly interesting," he remarked, holding it up to +the light and sniffing at it. "What do you make of this string, +Lestrade?" + +"It has been tarred." + +"Precisely. It is a piece of tarred twine. You have also, no doubt, +remarked that Miss Cushing has cut the cord with a scissors, as can be +seen by the double fray on each side. This is of importance." + +"I cannot see the importance," said Lestrade. + +"The importance lies in the fact that the knot is left intact, and that +this knot is of a peculiar character." + +"It is very neatly tied. I had already made a note to that effect," said +Lestrade, complacently. + +"So much for the string then," said Holmes, smiling; "now for the box +wrapper. Brown paper, with a distinct smell of coffee. What, you did not +observe it? I think there can be no doubt of it. Address printed in +rather straggling characters: 'Miss S. Cushing, Cross Street, Croydon.' +Done with a broad pointed pen, probably a J, and with very inferior ink. +The word Croydon has been spelt originally with an i, which has been +changed to y. The parcel was directed, then, by a man--the printing is +distinctly masculine--of limited education and unacquainted with the +town of Croydon. So far, so good! The box is a yellow, half-pound +honeydew box, with nothing distinctive save two thumb marks at the left +bottom corner. It is filled with rough salt of the quality used for +preserving hides and other of the coarser commercial purposes. And +embedded in it are these very singular inclosures." + +[Illustration: "HE EXAMINED THEM MINUTELY."] + +He took out the two ears as he spoke, and laying a board across his +knees, he examined them minutely, while Lestrade and I, bending forward +on each side of him, glanced alternately at these dreadful relics and +at the thoughtful, eager face of our companion. Finally he returned them +to the box once more, and sat for a while in deep thought. + +"You have observed, of course," said he at last, "that the ears are not +a pair." + +"Yes, I have noticed that. But if this were the practical joke of some +students from the dissecting-rooms, it would be as easy for them to send +two odd ears as a pair." + +"Precisely. But this is not a practical joke." + +"You are sure of it?" + +"The presumption is strongly against it. Bodies in the dissecting-rooms +are injected with preservative fluid. These ears bear no signs of this. +They are fresh, too. They have been cut off with a blunt instrument, +which would hardly happen if a student had done it. Again, carbolic or +rectified spirits would be the preservatives which would suggest +themselves to the medical mind, certainly not rough salt. I repeat that +there is no practical joke here, but that we are investigating a serious +crime." + +A vague thrill ran through me as I listened to my companion's words and +saw the stern gravity which had hardened his features. This brutal +preliminary seemed to shadow forth some strange and inexplicable horror +in the background. Lestrade, however, shook his head like a man who is +only half convinced. + +"There are objections to the joke theory, no doubt," said he; "but there +are much stronger reasons against the other. We know that this woman has +led a most quiet and respectable life at Penge and here for the last +twenty years. She has hardly been away from her home for a day during +that time. Why on earth, then, should any criminal send her the proofs +of his guilt, especially as, unless she is a most consummate actress, +she understands quite as little of the matter as we do?" + +"That is the problem which we have to solve," Holmes answered, "and for +my part I shall set about it by presuming that my reasoning is correct, +and that a double murder has been committed. One of these ears is a +woman's, small, finely formed, and pierced for an earring. The other is +a man's, sun-burned, discoloured, and also pierced for an earring. These +two people are presumably dead, or we should have heard their story +before now. To-day is Friday. The packet was posted on Thursday morning. +The tragedy, then, occurred on Wednesday or Tuesday, or earlier. If the +two people were murdered, who but their murderer would have sent this +sign of his work to Miss Cushing? We may take it that the sender of the +packet is the man whom we want. But he must have some strong reason for +sending Miss Cushing this packet. What reason, then? It must have been +to tell her that the deed was done; or to pain her, perhaps. But in that +case she knows who it is. Does she know? I doubt it. If she knew, why +should she call the police in? She might have buried the ears, and no +one would have been the wiser. That is what she would have done if she +had wished to shield the criminal. But if she does not wish to shield +him she would give his name. There is a tangle here which needs +straightening out." He had been talking in a high, quick voice, staring +blankly up over the garden fence, but now he sprang briskly to his feet +and walked towards the house. + +"I have a few questions to ask Miss Cushing," said he. + +"In that case I may leave you here," said Lestrade, "for I have another +small business on hand. I think that I have nothing further to learn +from Miss Cushing. You will find me at the police-station." + +"We shall look in on our way to the train," answered Holmes. A moment +later he and I were back in the front room, where the impassive lady was +still quietly working away at her antimacassar. She put it down on her +lap as we entered, and looked at us with her frank, searching blue eyes. + +"I am convinced, sir," she said, "that this matter is a mistake, and +that the parcel was never meant for me at all. I have said this several +times to the gentleman from Scotland Yard, but he simply laughs at me. I +have not an enemy in the world, as far as I know, so why should anyone +play me such a trick?" + +"I am coming to be of the same opinion, Miss Cushing," said Holmes, +taking a seat beside her. "I think that it is more than probable--" he +paused, and I was surprised on glancing round to see that he was staring +with singular intentness at the lady's profile. Surprise and +satisfaction were both for an instant to be read upon his eager face, +though when she glanced round to find out the cause of his silence he +had become as demure as ever. I stared hard myself at her flat, grizzled +hair, her trim cap, her little gilt earrings, her placid features; but I +could see nothing which could account for my companion's evident +excitement. + +"There were one or two questions----" + +"Oh, I am weary of questions!" cried Miss Cushing, impatiently. + +"You have two sisters, I believe." + +"How could you know that?" + +"I observed the very instant that I entered the room that you have a +portrait group of three ladies upon the mantelpiece, one of whom is +undoubtedly yourself, while the others are so exceedingly like you that +there could be no doubt of the relationship." + +"Yes, you are quite right. Those are my sisters, Sarah and Mary." + +"And here at my elbow is another portrait, taken at Liverpool, of your +younger sister, in the company of a man who appears to be a steward by +his uniform. I observe that she was unmarried at the time." + +"You are very quick at observing." + +"That is my trade." + +"Well, you are quite right. But she was married to Mr. Browner a few +days afterwards. He was on the South American line when that was taken, +but he was so fond of her that he couldn't abide to leave her for so +long, and he got into the Liverpool and London boats." + +"Ah, the _Conqueror_, perhaps?" + +"No, the _May Day_, when last I heard. Jim came down here to see me +once. That was before he broke the pledge; but afterwards he would +always take drink when he was ashore, and a little drink would send him +stark, staring mad. Ah! it was a bad day that ever he took a glass in +his hand again. First he dropped me, and then he quarrelled with Sarah, +and now that Mary has stopped writing we don't know how things are going +with them." + +[Illustration: "HOW FAR TO WALLINGTON?"] + +It was evident that Miss Cushing had come upon a subject on which she +felt very deeply. Like most people who lead a lonely life, she was shy +at first, but ended by becoming extremely communicative. She told us +many details about her brother-in-law the steward, and then wandering +off on to the subject of her former lodgers, the medical students, she +gave us a long account of their delinquencies, with their names and +those of their hospitals. + +Holmes listened attentively to everything, throwing in a question from +time to time. + +"About your second sister, Sarah," said he. "I wonder, since you are +both maiden ladies, that you do not keep house together." + +"Ah! you don't know Sarah's temper, or you would wonder no more. I tried +it when I came to Croydon, and we kept on until about two months ago, +when we had to part. I don't want to say a word against my own sister, +but she was always meddlesome and hard to please, was Sarah." + +"You say that she quarrelled with your Liverpool relations." + +"Yes, and they were the best of friends at one time. Why, she went up +there to live just in order to be near them. And now she has no word +hard enough for Jim Browner. The last six months that she was here she +would speak of nothing but his drinking and his ways. He had caught her +meddling, I suspect, and given her a bit of his mind, and that was the +start of it." + +"Thank you, Miss Cushing," said Holmes, rising and bowing. "Your sister +Sarah lives, I think you said, at New Street, Wallington? Good-bye, and +I am very sorry that you should have been troubled over a case with +which, as you say, you have nothing whatever to do." + +There was a cab passing as we came out, and Holmes hailed it. + +"How far to Wallington?" he asked. + +"Only about a mile, sir." + +"Very good. Jump in, Watson. We must strike while the iron is hot. +Simple as the case is, there have been one or two very instructive +details in connection with it. Just pull up at a telegraph office as you +pass, cabby." + +Holmes sent off a short wire, and for the rest of the drive lay back in +the cab with his hat tilted over his nose to keep the sun from his face. +Our driver pulled up at a house which was not unlike the one which we +had just quitted. My companion ordered him to wait, and had his hand +upon the knocker, when the door opened and a grave young gentleman in +black, with a very shiny hat, appeared on the step. + +"Is Miss Sarah Cushing at home?" asked Holmes. + +"Miss Sarah Cushing is extremely ill," said he. "She has been suffering +since yesterday from brain symptoms of great severity. As her medical +adviser, I cannot possibly take the responsibility of allowing anyone to +see her. I should recommend you to call again in ten days." He drew on +his gloves, closed the door, and marched off down the street. + +"Well, if we can't, we can't," said Holmes, cheerfully. + +"Perhaps she could not, or would not have told you much." + +"I did not wish her to tell me anything. I only wanted to look at her. +However, I think that I have got all that I want. Drive us to some +decent hotel, cabby, where we may have some lunch, and afterwards we +shall drop down upon friend Lestrade at the police-station." + +We had a pleasant little meal together, during which Holmes would talk +about nothing but violins, narrating with great exultation how he had +purchased his own Stradivarius, which was worth at least five hundred +guineas, at a Jew broker's in Tottenham Court Road for fifty-five +shillings. This led him to Paganini, and we sat for an hour over a +bottle of claret while he told me anecdote after anecdote of that +extraordinary man. The afternoon was far advanced and the hot glare had +softened into a mellow glow before we found ourselves at the +police-station. Lestrade was waiting for us at the door. + +"A telegram for you, Mr. Holmes," said he. + +"Ha! It is the answer!" He tore it open, glanced his eyes over it, and +crumpled it into his pocket. "That's all right," said he. + +"Have you found out anything?" + +"I have found out everything!" + +"What!" Lestrade stared at him in amazement. "You are joking." + +"I was never more serious in my life. A shocking crime has been +committed, and I think that I have now laid bare every detail of it." + +"And the criminal?" + +Holmes scribbled a few words upon the back of one of his visiting cards +and threw it over to Lestrade. + +"That is it," he said; "you cannot effect an arrest until to-morrow +night at the earliest. I should prefer that you would not mention my +name at all in connection with the case, as I choose to be associated +only with those crimes which present some difficulty in their solution. +Come on, Watson." We strode off together to the station, leaving +Lestrade still staring with a delighted face at the card which Holmes +had thrown him. + + * * * * * + +"The case," said Sherlock Holmes, as we chatted over our cigars that +night in our rooms at Baker Street, "is one where, as in the +investigations which you have chronicled under the names of the 'Study +in Scarlet' and of the 'Sign of Four,' we have been compelled to reason +backward from effects to causes. I have written to Lestrade asking him +to supply us with the details which are now wanting, and which he will +only get after he has secured his man. That he may be safely trusted to +do, for although he is absolutely devoid of reason, he is as tenacious +as a bulldog when he once understands what he has to do, and indeed it +is just this tenacity which has brought him to the top at Scotland +Yard." + +"Your case is not complete, then?" I asked. + +"It is fairly complete in essentials. We know who the author of the +revolting business is, although one of the victims still escapes us. Of +course, you have formed your own conclusions." + +"I presume that this Jim Browner, the steward of a Liverpool boat, is +the man whom you suspect?" + +"Oh! it is more than a suspicion." + +"And yet I cannot see anything save very vague indications." + +"On the contrary, to my mind nothing could be more clear. Let me run +over the principal steps. We approached the case, you remember, with an +absolutely blank mind, which is always an advantage. We had formed no +theories. We were simply there to observe and to draw inferences from +our observations. What did we see first? A very placid and respectable +lady, who seemed quite innocent of any secret, and a portrait which +showed me that she had two younger sisters. It instantly flashed across +my mind that the box might have been meant for one of these. I set the +idea aside as one which could be disproved or confirmed at our leisure. +Then we went to the garden, as you remember, and we saw the very +singular contents of the little yellow box. + +"The string was of the quality which is used by sail-makers aboard ship, +and at once a whiff of the sea was perceptible in our investigation. +When I observed that the knot was one which is popular with sailors, +that the parcel had been posted at a port, and that the male ear was +pierced for an earring which is so much more common among sailors than +landsmen, I was quite certain that all the actors in the tragedy were to +be found among our seafaring classes. + +"When I came to examine the address of the packet I observed that it was +to Miss S. Cushing. Now, the oldest sister would, of course, be Miss +Cushing, and although her initial was 'S.,' it might belong to one of +the others as well. In that case we should have to commence our +investigation from a fresh basis altogether. I therefore went into the +house with the intention of clearing up this point. I was about to +assure Miss Cushing that I was convinced that a mistake had been made, +when you may remember that I came suddenly to a stop. The fact was that +I had just seen something which filled me with surprise, and at the same +time narrowed the field of our inquiry immensely. + +"As a medical man, you are aware, Watson, that there is no part of the +body which varies so much as the human ear. Each ear is as a rule quite +distinctive, and differs from all other ones. In last year's +_Anthropological Journal_ you will find two short monographs from my pen +upon the subject. I had therefore examined the ears in the box with the +eyes of an expert, and had carefully noted their anatomical +peculiarities. Imagine my surprise then, when, on looking at Miss +Cushing, I perceived that her ear corresponded exactly with the female +ear which I had just inspected. The matter was entirely beyond +coincidence. There was the same shortening of the pinna, the same broad +curve of the upper lobe, the same convolution of the inner cartilage. In +all essentials it was the same ear. + +"Of course, I at once saw the enormous importance of the observation. It +was evident that the victim was a blood relation, and probably a very +close one. I began to talk to her about her family, and you remember +that she at once gave us some exceedingly valuable details. + +[Illustration: "JIM BROWNER."] + +"In the first place, her sister's name was Sarah, and her address had, +until recently, been the same, so that it was quite obvious how the +mistake had occurred, and whom the packet was meant for. Then we heard +of this steward, married to the third sister, and learned that he had at +one time been so intimate with Miss Sarah that she had actually gone up +to Liverpool to be near the Browners, but a quarrel had afterwards +divided them. This quarrel had put a stop to all communications for some +months, so that if Browner had occasion to address a packet to Miss +Sarah, he would undoubtedly have done so to her old address. + +"And now the matter had begun to straighten itself out wonderfully. We +had learned of the existence of this steward, an impulsive man, of +strong passions--you remember that he threw up what must have been a +very superior berth, in order to be nearer to his wife--subject, too, to +occasional fits of hard drinking. We had reason to believe that his wife +had been murdered, and that a man--presumably a seafaring man--had been +murdered at the same time. Jealousy, of course, at once suggests itself +as the motive for the crime. And why should these proofs of the deed be +sent to Miss Sarah Cushing? Probably because during her residence in +Liverpool she had some hand in bringing about the events which led to +the tragedy. You will observe that this line of boats calls at Belfast, +Dublin, and Waterford; so that, presuming that Browner had committed the +deed, and had embarked at once upon his steamer, the _May Day_, Belfast +would be the first place at which he could post his terrible packet. + +"A second solution was at this stage obviously possible, and although I +thought it exceedingly unlikely, I was determined to elucidate it before +going further. An unsuccessful lover might have killed Mr. and Mrs. +Browner, and the male ear might have belonged to the husband. There were +many grave objections to this theory, but it was conceivable. I +therefore sent off a telegram to my friend Algar, of the Liverpool +force, and asked him to find out if Mrs. Browner were at home, and if +Browner had departed in the _May Day_. Then we went on to Wallington to +visit Miss Sarah. + +"I was curious, in the first place, to see how far the family ear had +been reproduced in her. Then, of course, she might give us very +important information, but I was not sanguine that she would. She must +have heard of the business the day before, since all Croydon was ringing +with it, and she alone could have understood whom the packet was meant +for. If she had been willing to help justice she would probably have +communicated with the police already. However, it was clearly our duty +to see her, so we went. We found that the news of the arrival of the +packet--for her illness dated from that time--had such an effect upon +her as to bring on brain fever. It was clearer than ever that she +understood its full significance, but equally clear that we should have +to wait some time for any assistance from her. + +"However, we were really independent of her help. Our answers were +waiting for us at the police-station, where I had directed Algar to send +them. Nothing could be more conclusive. Mrs. Browner's house had been +closed for more than three days, and the neighbours were of opinion that +she had gone south to see her relatives. It had been ascertained at the +shipping offices that Browner had left aboard of the _May Day_, and I +calculate that she is due in the Thames to-morrow night. When he arrives +he will be met by the obtuse but resolute Lestrade, and I have no doubt +that we shall have all our details filled in." + + * * * * * + +Sherlock Holmes was not disappointed in his expectations. Two days later +he received a bulky envelope, which contained a short note from the +detective, and a type-written document, which covered several pages of +foolscap. + +"Lestrade has got him all right," said Holmes, glancing up at me. +"Perhaps it would interest you to hear what he says." + + "My dear Mr. Holmes,--In accordance with the scheme which we + had formed in order to test our theories"--"the 'we' is rather + fine, Watson, is it not?"--"I went down to the Albert Dock + yesterday at 6 p.m., and boarded the ss. _May Day_, belonging + to the Liverpool, Dublin, and London Steam Packet Company. On + inquiry, I found that there was a steward on board of the name + of James Browner, and that he had acted during the voyage in + such an extraordinary manner that the captain had been + compelled to relieve him of his duties. On descending to his + berth, I found him seated upon a chest with his head sunk upon + his hands, rocking himself to and fro. He is a big, powerful + chap, clean-shaven, and very swarthy--something like Aldridge, + who helped us in the bogus laundry affair. He jumped up when he + heard my business, and I had my whistle to my lips to call a + couple of river police, who were round the corner, but he + seemed to have no heart in him, and he held out his hands + quietly enough for the darbies. We brought him along to the + cells, and his box as well, for we thought there might be + something incriminating; but, bar a big sharp knife, such as + most sailors have, we got nothing for our trouble. However, we + find that we shall want no more evidence, for, on being brought + before the inspector at the station, he asked leave to make a + statement, which was, of course, taken down, just as he made + it, by our shorthand man. We had three copies type-written, one + of which I inclose. The affair proves, as I always thought it + would, to be an extremely simple one, but I am obliged to you + for assisting me in my investigation. With kind regards, yours + very truly,--G. LESTRADE." + +"Hum! The investigation really was a very simple one," remarked Holmes; +"but I don't think it struck him in that light when he first called us +in. However, let us see what Jim Browner has to say for himself. This is +his statement, as made before Inspector Montgomery at the Shadwell +Police Station, and it has the advantage of being verbatim." + +[Illustration: "HE HELD OUT HIS HANDS QUIETLY."] + +"Have I anything to say? Yes, I have a deal to say. I have to make a +clean breast of it all. You can hang me, or you can leave me alone. I +don't care a plug which you do. I tell you I've not shut an eye in sleep +since I did it, and I don't believe I ever will again until I get past +all waking. Sometimes it's his face, but most generally it's hers. I'm +never without one or the other before me. He looks frowning and +black-like, but she has a kind o' surprise upon her face. Aye, the white +lamb, she might well be surprised when she read death on a face that had +seldom looked anything but love upon her before. + +"But it was Sarah's fault, and may the curse of a broken man put a +blight on her and set the blood rotting in her veins! It's not that I +want to clear myself. I know that I went back to drink, like the beast +that I was. But she would have forgiven me; she would have stuck as +close to me as a rope to a block if that woman had never darkened our +door. For Sarah Cushing loved me--that's the root of the business--she +loved me, until all her love turned to poisonous hate when she knew that +I thought more of my wife's footmark in the mud than I did of her whole +body and soul. + +"There were three sisters altogether. The old one was just a good woman, +the second was a devil, and the third was an angel. Sarah was +thirty-three, and Mary was twenty-nine when I married. We were just as +happy as the day was long when we set up house together, and in all +Liverpool there was no better woman than my Mary. And then we asked +Sarah up for a week, and the week grew into a month, and one thing led +to another, until she was just one of ourselves. + +"I was blue ribbon at that time, and we were putting a little money by, +and all was as bright as a new dollar. My God, whoever would have +thought that it could have come to this? Whoever would have dreamed it? + +"I used to be home for the week-ends very often, and sometimes if the +ship were held back for cargo I would have a whole week at a time, and +in this way I saw a deal of my sister-in-law, Sarah. She was a fine tall +woman, black and quick and fierce, with a proud way of carrying her +head, and a glint from her eye like the spark from a flint. But when +little Mary was there I had never a thought for her, and that I swear as +I hope for God's mercy. + +"It had seemed to me sometimes that she liked to be alone with me, or to +coax me out for a walk with her, but I had never thought anything of +that. But one evening my eyes were opened. I had come up from the ship +and found my wife out, but Sarah at home. 'Where's Mary?' I asked. 'Oh, +she has gone to pay some accounts.' I was impatient and paced up and +down the room. 'Can't you be happy for five minutes without Mary, Jim?' +says she. 'It's a bad compliment to me that you can't be contented with +my society for so short a time.' 'That's all right, my lass," said I, +putting out my hand towards her in a kindly way, but she had it in both +hers in an instant, and they burned as if they were in a fever. I looked +into her eyes and I read it all there. There was no need for her to +speak, nor for me either. I frowned and drew my hand away. Then she +stood by my side in silence for a bit, and then put up her hand and +patted me on the shoulder. + +'Steady old Jim!' said she; and, with a kind o' mocking laugh, she ran +out of the room. + +"Well, from that time Sarah hated me with her whole heart and soul, and +she is a woman who can hate, too. I was a fool to let her go on biding +with us--a besotted fool--but I never said a word to Mary, for I knew it +would grieve her. Things went on much as before, but after a time I +began to find that there was a bit of a change in Mary herself. She had +always been so trusting and so innocent, but now she became queer and +suspicious, wanting to know where I had been and what I had been doing, +and whom my letters were from, and what I had in my pockets, and a +thousand such follies. Day by day she grew queerer and more irritable, +and we had causeless rows about nothing. I was fairly puzzled by it all. +Sarah avoided me now, but she and Mary were just inseparable. I can see +now how she was plotting and scheming and poisoning my wife's mind +against me, but I was such a blind beetle that I could not understand it +at the time. Then I broke my blue ribbon and began to drink again, but I +think I should not have done it if Mary had been the same as ever. She +had some reason to be disgusted with me now, and the gap between us +began to be wider and wider. And then this Alec Fairbairn chipped in, +and things became a thousand times blacker. + +[Illustration: "THAT'S ALL RIGHT, MY LASS, SAID I."] + +"It was to see Sarah that he came to my house first, but soon it was to +see us, for he was a man with winning ways, and he made friends wherever +he went. He was a dashing, swaggering chap, smart and curled, who had +seen half the world, and could talk of what he had seen. He was good +company, I won't deny it, and he had wonderful polite ways with him for +a sailor man, so that I think there must have been a time when he knew +more of the poop than the forecastle. For a month he was in and out of +my house, and never once did it cross my mind that harm might come of +his soft, tricky ways. And then at last something made me suspect, and +from that day my peace was gone for ever. + +"It was only a little thing, too. I had come into the parlour +unexpected, and as I walked in at the door I saw a light of welcome on +my wife's face. But as she saw who it was it faded again, and she +turned away with a look of disappointment. That was enough for me. There +was no one but Alec Fairbairn whose step she could have mistaken for +mine. If I could have seen him then I should have killed him, for I have +always been like a madman when my temper gets loose. Mary saw the +devil's light in my eyes, and she ran forward with her hands on my +sleeve. 'Don't, Jim, don't!' says she. 'Where's Sarah?' I asked. 'In the +kitchen,' says she. 'Sarah,' says I, as I went in, 'this man Fairbairn +is never to darken my door again.' 'Why not?' says she. 'Because I order +it.' 'Oh!' says she, 'if my friends are not good enough for this house, +then I am not good enough for it either.' 'You can do what you like,' +says I, 'but if Fairbairn shows his face here again, I'll send you one +of his ears for a keepsake." She was frightened by my face, I think, for +she never answered a word, and the same evening she left my house. + +"Well, I don't know now whether it was pure devilry on the part of this +woman, or whether she thought that she could turn me against my wife by +encouraging her to misbehave. Anyway, she took a house just two streets +off, and let lodgings to sailors. Fairbairn used to stay there, and Mary +would go round to have tea with her sister and him. How often she went I +don't know, but I followed her one day, and as I broke in at the door +Fairbairn got away over the back garden wall, like the cowardly skunk +that he was. I swore to my wife that I would kill her if I found her in +his company again, and I led her back with me, sobbing and trembling, +and as white as a piece of paper. There was no trace of love between us +any longer. I could see that she hated me and feared me, and when the +thought of it drove me to drink, then she despised me as well. + +"Well, Sarah found that she could not make a living in Liverpool, so she +went back, as I understand, to live with her sister in Croydon, and +things jogged on much the same as ever at home. And then came this last +week and all the misery and ruin. + +"It was in this way. We had gone on the _May Day_ for a round voyage of +seven days, but a hogshead got loose and started one of our plates, so +that we had to put back into port for twelve hours. I left the ship and +came home, thinking what a surprise it would be for my wife, and hoping +that maybe she would be glad to see me so soon. The thought was in my +head as I turned into my own street, and at that moment a cab passed me, +and there she was, sitting by the side of Fairbairn, the two chatting +and laughing, with never a thought for me as I stood watching them from +the footpath. + +"I tell you, and I give you my word on it, that from that moment I was +not my own master, and it is all like a dim dream when I look back on +it. I had been drinking hard of late, and the two things together fairly +turned my brain. There's something throbbing in my head now, like a +docker's hammer, but that morning I seemed to have all Niagara whizzing +and buzzing in my ears. + +"Well, I took to my heels, and I ran after the cab. I had a heavy oak +stick in my hand, and I tell you that I saw red from the first; but as I +ran I got cunning, too, and hung back a little to see them without being +seen. They pulled up soon at the railway station. There was a good crowd +round the booking-office, so I got quite close to them without being +seen. They took tickets for New Brighton. So did I, but I got in three +carriages behind them. When we reached it they walked along the Parade, +and I was never more than a hundred yards from them. At last I saw them +hire a boat and start for a row, for it was a very hot day, and they +thought no doubt that it would be cooler on the water. + +"It was just as if they had been given into my hands. There was a bit of +a haze, and you could not see more than a few hundred yards. I hired a +boat for myself, and I pulled after them. I could see the blurr of their +craft, but they were going nearly as fast as I, and they must have been +a long mile from the shore before I caught them up. The haze was like a +curtain all round us, and there were we three in the middle of it. My +God, shall I ever forget their faces when they saw who was in the boat +that was closing in upon them? She screamed out. He swore like a madman, +and jabbed at me with an oar, for he must have seen death in my eyes. I +got past it and got one in with my stick, that crushed his head like an +egg. I would have spared her, perhaps, for all my madness, but she threw +her arms round him, crying out to him, and calling him 'Alec.' I struck +again, and she lay stretched beside him. I was like a wild beast then +that had tasted blood. If Sarah had been there, by the Lord, she should +have joined them. I pulled out my knife, and--well, there! I've said +enough. It gave me a kind of savage joy when I thought how Sarah would +feel when she had such signs as these of what her meddling had brought +about. Then I tied the bodies into the boat, stove a plank, and stood +by until they had sunk. I knew very well that the owner would think that +they had lost their bearings in the haze, and had drifted off out to +sea. I cleaned myself up, got back to land, and joined my ship without a +soul having a suspicion of what had passed. That night I made up the +packet for Sarah Cushing, and next day I sent it from Belfast. + +[Illustration] + +"There you have the whole truth of it. You can hang me, or do what you +like with me, but you cannot punish me as I have been punished already. +I cannot shut my eyes but I see those two faces staring at me--staring +at me as they stared when my boat broke through the haze. I killed them +quick, but they are killing me slow; and if I have another night of it I +shall be either mad or dead before morning. You won't put me alone into +a cell, sir? For pity's sake don't, and may you be treated in your day +of agony as you treat me now." + + * * * * * + +"What is the meaning of it, Watson?" said Holmes, solemnly, as he laid +down the paper. "What object is served by this circle of misery and +violence and fear? It must tend to some end, or else our universe is +ruled by chance, which is unthinkable. But what end? There is the great +standing perennial problem to which human reason is as far from an +answer as ever." + + + + +_Types of English Beauty._ + + +FROM PHOTOGRAPHS BY ALEX. BASSANO, OLD BOND STREET, W. + +[Illustration: MISS LEE. + +MISS MENCE. + +MISS HAYTER.] + +[Illustration: THE COUNTESS OF ANNESLEY.] + +[Illustration: THE MISSES HATHAWAY. (TWINS).] + + + + +PECULIAR PLAYING CARDS. + +By George Clulow. + +[Illustration: 'BEHOLD FOVR KINGS IN MAIESTY REVERED' + +Pope] + + +'What's on the cards?' A question common enough when the actual +knowledge of the moment does not afford a positive answer; a question, +too, which has an origin taking us back to the earliest use of playing +cards. But to how many of those to whom playing cards as a means of +recreation are familiar is it known what _may_ be found on the cards? +Yet upon these "bits of painted cardboard" there has been expended a +greater amount of ingenuity and of artistic effort than is to be found +in any other form of popular amusement. Pope's charming epic, "The Rape +of the Lock," gives us, in poetic form, a description of the faces of +the cards as known to him and to the card-players of his time:-- + + "Behold four kings in majesty revered, + With hoary whiskers and a forky beard; + And four fair queens, whose hands sustain a flower, + Th' expressive emblem of their softer pow'r; + Four knaves in garbs succinct, a trusty band, + Caps on their heads and halberds in their hand." + +[Illustration: FIG. 1.] + +It is not our purpose to historically trace the evolution of cards--this +is a subject beyond the reach of the present article--but a look farther +afield will give us evidence that during the last three centuries there +has been a constant adaptation of cards to purposes which take them +beyond their intention as the instruments for card playing only. The +idea that playing cards had their origin in the later years of Charles +VI. of France may be disposed of at once as a popular error, though it +is true that the earliest authentic examples which still exist are +parts of the two packs of cards which were produced for the amusement of +that King, by the hands of Jacques Gringonneur, and of which seventeen +are preserved in the Bibliotheque Nationale of Paris. + +These are the most early forms of playing cards, and are known as +"Tarots" (as distinguished from "Numerals," or cards which have the +consecutively marked "suit" signs), and which had evidently a purpose +outside the ordinary games of playing cards as known to us. The "Tarot" +pack consists variously of seventy-two, seventy-seven, or seventy-eight +cards, including the "Tarots," which give them their distinctive name. +"Tarot" as a game was familiar three centuries ago in England, but is so +no longer, although it has a limited use in other parts of Europe still. +One of the "Tarot" cards, of the Bibliotheque Nationale, "La Mort," is +shown as the first of our illustrations (Fig. 1). + +[Illustration: FIG. 2.] + +[Illustration: FIG. 3.] + +Familiar to those who are conversant with the literature of playing +cards will be the Knave of Clubs, shown in Fig. 2, which is one of the +fragments of a pack of cards found, in 1841, by Mr. Chatto, in the +wastepaper used to form the pasteboard covers of a book. These cards are +printed in outline from wood blocks and the colour filled in by +stencilling, a method employed in the manufacture of cards down to a +very few years ago. The date of these cards may safely be taken as not +more recent than 1450, and they are most interesting as being coeval +with, if not antecedent to, the most early form of printed book +illustration as shown in the "Biblia Pauperum."[B] The archaic drawing +of the features, with its disregard of facial perspective, and the +wondrous cervical anatomy, do not lessen our admiration of the vigour +and "go" shown in this early example of the art of the designer and wood +engraver. + +It is in interesting relation to the knaves of a pack of cards to note +the curious conservatism which has belonged to them during the last four +centuries and a half. In a MS. in the British Museum, written in the +year 1377, the monkish writer, in a moralization on the life of man, +suggests its resemblance to a game of cards; and he gives us a +description and the attributes of some of the cards. Of those which we +now know as knaves, he says two of them hold their halberds or arms +downwards and two of them upwards--a distinction which is retained on +many of the playing cards still manufactured. + +[Illustration: FIG. 4.] + +In Fig. 3 we have one of the cards from a series of "Tarots" of Italian +origin, also preserved in the Bibliotheque Nationale, and which may be +dated about 1470. These are very beautiful in design, and indicate that +they were thought worthy of the employment of the highest artistic +talent. + +We have an example of a somewhat more modern date in the Knave of +Diamonds (Fig. 4), in which the costume and character point to the early +part of the sixteenth century as the period of their production. This +also is from a fragment discovered in the boards of an old book--a +source which may be commended to the watchfulness of the bookbinder, as +the bindings of old books are still likely to provide other interesting +examples. + +[Illustration: FIG. 5] + +Before us are parts of two packs of cards which were discovered in +Edinburgh, in 1821, pasted up in a book of household accounts, one of +its leaves bearing the date of 1562; and it would be no great stretch of +fancy to believe that they were taken to Edinburgh by some follower of +Mary Queen of Scots on her return to Scotland a year before this date. +These cards are of Flemish make; on one of them is the name "Jehan +Henault," who was a card-maker in Antwerp in 1543, and in passing we may +remark that at this period there was a considerable trade between London +and France in playing cards of Flemish manufacture. Old playing cards +may be looked for in most unlikely places; a few years ago two nearly +complete packs were found wedged in an old cross-bow, for the purpose of +securing the bow where it had worked loose in the head; they were of +sixteenth century manufacture, and had doubtless been the means of +relieving the tedium of many a weary watch or waiting, in field or +fortress, before they found their resting-place of a couple of centuries +in the obsolete missive weapon where they were discovered. + +We find on many cards some attempts at portraiture. Thus we have in Fig. +5 Clovis as the King of Clubs, but depicted in a costume of the time of +Henry IV. of France, the card itself being of that period. This, as well +as Fig. 4, is from a pack of fifty-two "Numeral" cards, printed from +wood-block and stencilled in colour. + +[Illustration: FIG. 6.] + +Returning to "Tarots," we have in Fig. 6 (Le Fou) one of the cards +designed by Mitelli about 1680, it is said to the order of a member of +the Bentivoglio family (parts of whose armorial bearings are to be found +on many of the cards), for the "Tarrocchini di Bologna," a special form +of the game of Tarot, a series of spirited designs of vigorous and +careful drawing, and the most artistically valuable of any of the Tarots +with which we are acquainted. In them not only the Tarot series but the +ordinary suits display a quaint conception and generally elegant design. + +It is curious to note that in the eleven packs or parts of packs of +these Bolognese cards which we have met with in various parts of Europe +there is not any uniformity of manufacture, but while the designs are +the same and evidently produced from the same copper plates, the making +of them into cards for the purpose of play bears indication of what +might be termed a "domestic" manufacture. For some time the game was +interdicted in Bologna, and it is possible that this may have induced a +surreptitious production and illicit sale of the cards. Fortunately, the +interdict did not prevent the preservation to us of this interesting +series. + +[Illustration: FIG. 7.] + +At different periods between the sixteenth and nineteenth centuries, but +notably in the two earlier of them, card "suits" have been used other +than the familiar ones of Hearts, Spades, Clubs, and Diamonds, and much +ingenuity and imagination have been exercised upon them. Among the most +beautiful of such cards we take the set designed and engraved by Virgil +Solis, the celebrated Nuremberg artist and engraver, in which the suit +signs are Lions, Peacocks, Monkeys, and Parroquets. In Fig. 7 we have +the Ace of Peacocks. The aces are lettered with the distinctive +suit-titles of the German cards, viz., "Grun," "Eicheln," "Schellen," +and "Herzen." The pack consists of fifty-two, divided into four suits of +thirteen cards each; the date of these cards is between 1535 and 1560, +and they are an important and valuable item in the artistic history of +playing cards. + +Another example of this variation in the suit signs, as well as of a +variation from the ordinary rectangular form, is to be found in the +round card (Fig. 8), of a somewhat earlier date than the preceding, +where the suits are Hares, Parrots, Pinks, and Columbines, and which +when complete make also a pack of fifty-two, the value of the cards +following the sequence of King, Queen, and Knave being indicated by the +Arabic numeral at the base of and the Roman figure at the top of each, +the card shown being the Six of Hares. + +[Illustration: FIG. 8] + +In both of them there is a great decorative facility and clever +adaptation to the form of the card. To indicate the coincidence of idea, +in the next (Fig. 9) we have a round card from India--one of the "Coate" +cards of a pack, or more properly series, of 120 cards. The material +used in their manufacture is matted vegetable fibre coated with lacquer +and painted by hand. Most of the playing cards of Persia are also round, +and are similarly decorated by the same means. About a dozen years ago +round playing cards were patented in America as a novelty, in ignorance +of the fact that cards of that shape had probably been in common use in +the East, centuries before the discovery of that great and inventive +country! + +[Illustration: FIG. 9.] + +[Illustration: FIG. 10.] + +As an illustration (Fig. 10) of the suit signs of Southern Europe, we +take a card from a Portuguese pack of 1610, the "Cavalier de Batons" +(Clubs); the other suit signs are Swords, Coins, and Cups. The anatomy +of the charger and the self-satisfied aspect of the Cavalier are +striking; and as to the former, we are reminded of the bizarre examples +of hippic adornment which, on a summer Bank Holiday, may be seen on the +road to Epping Forest. + +[Illustration: FIG. 11.] + +Among the secondary uses to which playing cards have been applied, we +find them as political weapons. Among such cards are those which were +produced to commemorate what is historically known as the "Titus Oates +Plot" in 1678, one of the most prominent incidents being the murder of +Sir Edmondbury Godfrey, who is here shown (Fig. 11), carried on a horse, +the day after his murder, to Primrose Hill, where the body was put into +a ditch, the carrying on the horse and the discovery in the ditch being +shown as coincident. They were produced, probably, as one of the means +of inflaming the public mind against the Roman Catholics, which led to +the execution, among others, of the Viscount Stafford in 1680. As +illustration of costume and of stirring incident, these cards are, apart +from their intention, an admirable and interesting series, and are worth +study from their historic and artistic aspects. + +[Illustration: FIG. 12.] + +[Illustration: FIG. 13.] + +[Illustration: FIG. 14.] + +We come now to playing cards designed as methods of education, of which +a considerable number have been produced--and which cover the widest +possible range--from cookery to astrology! In the middle and latter half +of the seventeenth century, England, France and Germany abounded in +examples, the most attractive being the series of "Jeux Historiques," +invented by Desmarests, a member of the French Academy acting under the +instructions of Cardinal Mazarin--as aids to the education of the boy +King, Louis XIV. In Figs. 12, 13, 14, and 15 are given examples from the +four packs so designed, and they afford a good instance of the primary +use of cards being subordinated to the educational. The first of these +is the "Jeu de Fables," with representations and short notices of the +heroes and heroines of classic history, the four Kings being Jupiter, +Neptune, Pluto, and Saturn. The second is the "Jeu de Geographie," the +four suits being formed by the division of the world into four quarters, +each having its distinctive group of thirteen designs, with brief +geographical descriptions; Great Britain being shown as the Eight of +Hearts. If designed by an Englishman, it would surely have been as Queen +of that suit that our country would have appeared. We have then the "Jeu +de Rois de France," intended to teach the history and succession of the +Kings of France, whom we find depicted in their numeric order, from +Pharamond to Louis XIV., with the length of their reigns and short +biographies. + +[Illustration: FIG. 15.] + +The third and fourth of these packs are singular in consisting in the +one case of all Kings, and the other of all Queens, in the "Jeu de +Reynes Renommees," the famous Queens of history, from the Queen of Sheba +downward, furnishing the design, and who are classified under the +descriptions of Good, Wise, Holy, Clever, Brave, Happy, Cruel, +Licentious, Capricious, and Unfortunate; our Queen Elizabeth being +placed as "clever," and Mary Stuart as "unfortunate." They are beautiful +examples of design and workmanship, and are the work of the Florentine +artist-engraver, Stefano de la Bella. + +(_To be continued._) + +FOOTNOTES: + +[B] A "block book," with its illustrations and text cut on a wood block, +and which is regarded as the immediate precursor of the type-printed +book. + + + + +[Illustration: THE COURTSHIP OF HALIL] + +BY A. E. BURN. + + +When I went out to Egypt some years ago, I determined to devote myself +to the study of Arabic, and not to rest till I could speak and write it +like an educated native. This rash resolve, however, was made in +ignorance of the sublime difficulties of this language, and after +plodding at it with great vigour for a year, and acquiring some facility +in speaking it, and the ability to read a sentence so as to sometimes +get a faint glimpse into the meaning hidden behind the hieroglyphs which +the Arabs call letters, I came to the conclusion that I had better rest +on my laurels. + +While my enthusiasm lasted I used to seize every possible opportunity of +talking Arabic with any native I came across, and great was my disgust +when, as sometimes happened, an Arab would persist in airing his English +on me. As a rule, however, they were rather flattered by my evident +desire to know their tongue, and some of the shopkeepers with whom I +dealt would take a pleasure in teaching me new phrases. + +One of these, by name Halil, who sold silks, shawls, etc., etc., and +whose respect I had gained by some considerable purchases for friends in +England, became quite intimate with me, and related to me a considerable +portion of his own history and that of his family, and it was from him +that I heard the following story of his courtship, which is not quite so +prosaic and business-like as such affairs usually are in Mohammedan +countries. His shop was in the silk bazaar at Cairo, and what first led +to the subject was a sentence in Arabic written over it, which I had +puzzled my brains in trying to read for some time before I at last +managed to translate it. It ran as follows: "Long is the hair of woman, +and long also is her understanding." This motto rather surprised me, as +the Arabs have not, as a rule, that high opinion of the fair sex's +understanding which it expressed, and I thought I could see the reason +for a certain reluctance to assist me in translating it in the usually +obliging Halil. After some evasive answers to my questions he took me +into his confidence, and told me the following story in explanation of +it:-- + +"I have already told you, Effendi, that my father died when I was +eighteen years old, and that, being the only son, I became proprietor of +this shop and the head of our household. + +"I was not married, and had no wish to be, as I looked upon women with +aversion and contempt, and was angry with my mother when she wished to +get me a wife. I was encouraged in these ideas by an old man named +Mahran Effendi, who had been a great friend of my father, and who still +came in the evening to my house to smoke a nargileh with me. He had two +wives, who gave him much trouble with their quarrels, and he used to say +that women were created as a punishment for the sins of men, and to +prevent them from being so much attached to this world as to be +unwilling to leave it even for the joys of paradise, which, he said, +would certainly be the case if there were no women. He repeated to me a +sentence which he said was out of the Koran, though I have not seen it +there myself. It was, 'Long is the hair of woman, but short is her +understanding.' + +"I was much struck with this, and repeated it to my mother with great +pleasure, who was not so much pleased with it as I was. Indeed, she was +quite angry, and said that Mahran was an old donkey, and the son of a +donkey. I, however, had a higher opinion of the wisdom of my old friend, +and, acting upon his advice, I determined to adopt this as my motto, and +to paint it over my shop instead of the proverb which had been put there +by my father. My motto made quite a stir in the bazaar for the first few +days, and caused a good deal of amusement amongst the other shopkeepers +and the passers-by. I have no doubt it was repeated in many of the +harems also, for some of the women, who may have been teased about it by +their husbands, reviled me as they passed. + +[Illustration: "SHE GAVE ME A GLANCE OUT OF HER DARK EYES."] + +"One day, not long after this, two women entered my shop and asked to be +shown some of my finest silks; so I took them into the inner part, where +I keep the most costly of my goods. While they were examining them I +noticed that one of them had eyes that shone like stars, and which she +kept fixed on me even while she laughed and chatted with her companion. +Then, in stooping to pick up one of the shawls, her veil by some means +became detached and fell to the ground, and I saw the face of what I +thought to be surely the loveliest houri ever seen by mortal man. She +gave a little scream and called to her companion, who seemed to be her +servant, to assist her to refasten it, but at the same time gave me a +smile and a glance out of her dark eyes, which swallowed up all my +dislike to women as the light of a taper is swallowed up in that of the +noonday sun. I was so confused by the new emotions which possessed my +soul, that when they departed, saying they would come again shortly to +decide about the silk, I could not utter a word to detain them. Nay, by +the beard of the Prophet, I could do nothing but gaze at the houri till +she was out of my sight. For three long days I waited in vain for their +return. At last my heart began to be sick within me, and I feared I +should never again behold the lovely maiden who had bewitched my soul, +when on the fourth day I saw two females approaching, and I recognised +that the slighter of the two was she. I had provided myself with several +gold pieces, and was ready to give them all, if necessary, to make the +attendant my friend. As soon as they had entered, and I had brought +forth my silks, I drew this woman aside, and slipping one of the gold +pieces into her hand, disclosed to her my passion for her mistress, and +begged her to tell me who she was. The woman seemed inclined to laugh at +first, but when I had finished became grave and said in a low voice, 'My +young mistress looks upon you with favour; but, alas! her father, the +Sheikh Abdu Hassan, is so mean that he cannot bear the thought of his +daughter marrying, on account of the dowry he would be expected to give +with her, and he will not even allow her to see any visitors, lest her +beauty should become known, and he tells all who ask for her that she is +very ugly and ill-tempered, so no one will marry her on that account; +but if you love Khadijah, my mistress, go to the Sheikh and say that you +will take her without any dowry, and then he will, perhaps, be tempted +to give her to you.' + +"When she had told me this, she went back to her mistress, and they both +hastily departed. + +"I shut my shop an hour earlier that day, and, on arriving home, told my +mother all that had happened. She was very much astonished, and could +not understand why, after refusing to have a wife for so long, I was now +so anxious to have one without a dowry. She tried to dissuade me, but I +paid no heed to her words, and went that same evening to the Sheikh, +whom I fortunately found alone. I told him who I was and what my +possessions were, and that I wanted a wife; but, as I had no one to +speak for me--my father being dead--I had come myself to ask him for his +daughter. + +"He listened quietly, with his eyes fixed on my face, and when I had +finished, said:-- + +"'Alas! my son, the girl Khadijah is ugly, and has the temper of a +mule.' + +"'For these things, O Sheikh,' I replied, 'I care not.' + +"'You think you will get a heavy dowry with her,' he said, coldly; 'it +is for that you have come.' + +"'I swear by the holy Prophet,' I cried, 'that I want the girl and not +the money. Nay, I will even take her without a single piastre, to prove +it.' + +"At these words his eye brightened, and on my promising that no one +should know that I was not to receive a dowry with her, he embraced me, +saying, 'She is yours, my son,' and the matter was settled. + +[Illustration: "A SHARP-FACED, UGLY WOMAN".] + +"Of course, I did not see my bride till we were married, which we were +in seven days. What was my horror when, after the ceremonies were over +and my wife unveiled, I beheld, instead of the lovely girl who had come +to my shop, a sharp-faced, ugly woman with a sour expression. I was dumb +with amazement; but, by a great effort, I controlled my temper, and +pretending to seem satisfied with my bargain, inwardly resolved to find +out why I had thus been duped. My wife soon showed her temper, and +quarrelled with my mother the very first day. She seemed to think she +had married beneath her, and to show her superiority, began to +ill-treat the servants, and usurped my mother's place in the house. + +"Some days after my wedding I was in my shop as usual, when the two +women appeared as before. I immediately beckoned them to follow me into +the inner part. As soon as we were there I turned to the false Khadijah, +and almost choking with anger I asked her why she had brought this curse +upon my life. + +"'What have I ever done to you that you should make such a day of pitch +for me?' I cried. + +"She laughed heartily, and her old servant followed her example. I was +just about to burst forth into a torrent of invectives when she threw +off her veil and, laying her hand on my arm, said softly, 'I have done +this, O Halil, to show you that the motto over your shop is not true, +and that the understanding of woman is as long as her hair. I will show +you a way by which you can divorce your wife without offending her +father, but on one condition only.' + +[Illustration: "CHANGE THE MOTTO OVER YOUR SHOP."] + +"'It is granted,' I cried, 'if I come freely out of this.' + +"'Change, then, the motto over your shop, and put instead, "Long is the +hair of woman, and long also is her understanding,"' she said, almost +fiercely. + +"'But I shall have the whole bazaar laughing at me,' I cried, aghast at +this proposal. 'I will take it away and restore my father's proverb if +you will help me, and will give you as much jewellery as you shall ask, +but I cannot change the motto to what you say.' + +"'Jewellery is nothing to me,' she said, scornfully. 'Change the motto +to what I have said, or keep your wife, I care not which.' Upon this she +veiled herself and was going away, but I detained her and said, 'O +maiden, you have asked me a very hard thing; but I will do even this if +you will rid me of this woman, and tell me in truth who you are, so that +I may have you for myself.' + +"She promised she would, and made me swear by the sacred window of the +Prophet that I would change the motto to her liking the day after I +should be married to her. She then went away, saying she had stayed too +long already, but that she would send her servant the next day, who +would tell me her plan. + +"On my return home that evening my mother met me with many complaints of +the behaviour of my wife, who had abused her during my absence, and she +ended by bewailing that I had not let her choose a wife for me. + +"The next day the servant appeared, and after telling me who her +mistress really was, thus unfolded her plan:-- + +"'To-morrow evening you must meet your father-in-law at the coffee-house +he frequents, and in the meantime collect some of the poorest and lowest +men you can find, and promise them a good backsheesh if they will obey +the orders you will give them, which are these: While you are at the +coffee-house the oldest man of them must come in and sit by your side, +and call you his dear nephew, and say he hears that you have made a rich +marriage, and that he hopes you are not going to slight your own +relations in consequence. The other men must follow his example, and say +much the same thing, but call you cousin, brother-in-law, or friend. + +"'The old Sheikh, who is very proud of his family, will want you to +divorce his daughter at once, but you must pretend you are too satisfied +with her to do that, and from threats he will come to entreaties, and +will at last want to bribe you. Not till then must you yield, and when +you do, it must be with apparent reluctance.' + +[Illustration: "I SAW DISGUST AND DISMAY RISE IN ABDU HASSAN'S FACE."] + +"I was overjoyed at this plan, and bestowed one of my brightest shawls +on Fatima, who went away promising to come soon again and see how I had +got on. I told my mother of the plan, which comforted her a good deal, +and on the next evening I carried it out. I saw disgust and dismay rise +in Abdu Hassan's face when we were at the cafe and the first dirty old +beggar came up to me and addressed me as his nephew, which became +mingled with rage when another ragged fellow came up to congratulate his +cousin, as he called me; but when two more supposed cousins had joined +us, even dirtier than the others, he could contain his feelings no +longer, and turning to me, cried: 'Is it true, O Halil, that these sons +of dogs are indeed your relations?' + +"'Yes, O Sheikh,' I said, humbly. 'Be not displeased with me; a man must +not disown the brother of his father, or the sons of his father's +sister, even though they be poor.' + +"'Poor!' he roared. 'Poor! They are not only poor, but they are sons of +pigs. Give me back my daughter. She shall not stay with you to be the +mother of dogs!' + +"'You cannot take her away unless I divorce her,' I replied, calmly, +'and that I will not do, for I love the girl.' + +"At this he began to entreat me, offering me at first four purses of +silver, and at last offered me the same number of purses filled with +gold, to which I consented, with apparent reluctance. + +"He made me divorce her that very evening, for divorce, as you know, +Effendi, is very easy with us; and a week afterwards I altered the motto +over my shop door to what it now is, for Ayesha (that was her true name) +was mine." + +As Halil finished his story, I became aware that he had another listener +in the shape of a little urchin, clad in a brightly coloured gown, which +reached to the ground, and who wore, perched on his closely-shaven head, +a small tarboosh. He had appeared from some corner of the shop, and now +sidled up to Halil, his bright black eyes fixed on my face. + +"See, Effendi," said Halil, with a proud smile, "this is the eldest of +my five boys." + +After I had rejoiced the eldest son's heart with a small "backsheesh," I +took leave of Halil with many friendly salutations, and a pressing +invitation on his part to come again soon. + + + + +_From Behind the Speaker's Chair._ + +(VIEWED BY HENRY W. LUCY.) + + [_The first of what, it is hoped, will be a long series of + articles, descriptive of the House of Commons, is here + appended. The author is Mr. Henry Lucy, who has spent nearly a + quarter of a century in the Press Gallery of the House, and + who, in addition to much other successful journalistic work, + has, in the character of "Toby, M.P.," supplied to our + distinguished contemporary, "Punch" some of its most amusing + sketches. "From Behind the Speaker's Chair" will be continued, + and will, we believe, be looked forward to by our readers, + month by month, with constant interest._--EDITOR.] + +[Illustration] + + +Eheu fugaces! It is just twenty years, marked by the opening Session, +since I first had the opportunity of viewing the House of Commons from a +coign of 'vantage behind the Speaker's Chair. It is more than twenty +years since I looked on the place with opportunity for closely studying +it. But, as I am reminded by an inscription in an old rare copy of +"Dod," it was in February, 1873, that I was installed in the Press +Gallery in charge of the Parliamentary business of a great daily paper. + +I first saw the House in circumstances that might well have led me to +the Clock Tower. It was in the spring of 1869. I was passing through +London, on my way to Paris, where I had proposed to myself to live for a +year, master the language, and proceed thence to other capitals of +Europe, learn their tongues, and return to storm the journalistic +citadel in London, armed with polyglot accomplishments. Even then I had +a strong drawing towards the House of Commons, but desired to see it, +not as the ordinary stranger beheld it from the gallery facing the +Chair, but from the Press Gallery itself. + +In those days the adventure was far more difficult than in existing +circumstances. The country Press was not represented save vicariously in +the form of a rare London correspondent, who wrote a weekly letter for +some phenomenally enterprising county paper. The aggregate of the London +staffs was far smaller than at present, and was, it struck me at the +time, composed almost exclusively of elderly gentlemen. The chances of +detection of an unauthorized stranger (being, moreover, a beardless +youth) were accordingly increased. But I was determined to see the House +from behind the Speaker's Chair, and was happy in the possession of a +friend as reckless as myself. He was on the staff of a morning journal, +and, though not a gallery man, knew most of the confraternity. + +One night he took me down to the gallery and endeavoured to induce more +than one of the old stagers to pilot me in. They stared aghast at the +proposal, and walked hurriedly away. We were permitted to stand at the +glass door giving entrance to the gallery and peer upon the House, which +struck me as being very empty. The door swung easily to and fro as the +men passed in and out, taking their turn. The temptation proved +irresistible. + +"I think I'll go in," I said. + +[Illustration: OLD STAGERS.] + +"Very well," dear old Walter hoarsely whispered. "Turn sharp to the +right, sit down on a back bench, and I daresay no one will notice you." + +At the corner of the bench, presumably guarding the doorway, sat a +portly gentleman in evening dress, with a gold badge slung across his +abundant shirt front. He was fast asleep, and I passed along the bench, +sitting down midway. At that time there were no desks in front of these +back benches, which were tenantless. I suppose my heart beat +tumultuously, but I sat there with apparent composure. At length I had +reached the House of Commons, and eagerly gazed upon it, feeling like +some watcher of the skies when a new planet swims into his ken; + + Or like stout Cortez when, with eagle eyes, + He stared at the Pacific. + +[Illustration: Fast asleep.] + +I don't know how long I sat there; probably not five minutes, certainly +long enough to be struck with the smallness of the chamber, the +commonplace appearance of the personages forming the historic assembly, +and the perfect manner in which they dissembled their interest in +current proceedings. Then I became conscious of a movement in the sunken +boxes before me, where the reporters, taking their turn, sat. Heads were +turned and whispered consultations took place. Someone woke up the +portly gentleman, whom through many later years I knew as Steele, the +chief janitor of the Press Gallery. + +In time, then far off, he became the possessor of a cottage and garden +in Kent, whither, wearied with his legislative labours, he used to +retire from Saturday to Monday. + +[Illustration: Roses.] + +In summer-time he always brought me two or three roses, which he put in +my hand with an awkward sort of flap, as if they were a slice of bacon +he was depositing on a counter. That was his way of intimating that it +was of no consequence. He noticed that I always comforted myself through +long debates and all-night sittings with a handful of flowers set in a +little glass on my desk, which was generally upset in the course of the +evening by some unsympathetic reporter borrowing my box during a +temporary absence, and clumsily turning round in the circumscribed +space. + +[Illustration: "Get out!"] + +But that is another story. It was no flowers that Steele now brought me, +but stern peremptory command to "get out!" He was unusually irate, first +at having been wakened out of his sleep, and secondly at having in +probably unique circumstances been caught napping at the post of duty. I +went forth disconsolate, and there was a great hubbub in the dark little +room outside. My friend and co-conspirator fled in affright when he saw +me actually enter the gallery. Now he dropped in in a casual way, and +stood at the edge of the crowd whilst Steele took down my name and +address, and told me I should "hear from the Serjeant-at-Arms." I don't +know whether that potentate ever communicated with me. I fancy Steele, +recognising his own somewhat imperilled position, was not anxious to +pursue the matter. Anyhow, I never heard from the Serjeant-at-Arms. +Walter and I agreed, as a matter of precaution, that I had better +hasten my departure for Paris, and two days later the English Channel +rolled between me and the Clock Tower. + +Next time I entered the Press Gallery it was as the accredited +representative of the _Pall Mall Gazette_. I came over from Paris to +spend Christmas at home, and never went back to complete that +continental tour in search of knowledge, which I fancy had been +suggested by Goldsmith's trip with his flute. It happened that in the +early days of 1870, the proprietor of the _Pall Mall Gazette_ began the +first of the series of chequered changes in the history of the journal, +by starting it as a morning paper. I had been an occasional contributor +in a humble way to the evening edition, and thought I might have a +chance of an appointment on the staff of the new morning paper. + +Mentioning this to my friend Walter, he undertook to see it through, +just as he had fallen in with the even more audacious proposal to enter +the Press Gallery. I remember we were not far off Northumberland Street +when the subject was broached, and might easily have walked there. But +Walter could never embark upon enterprises of this kind unless he went +in a cab, the driver being incited to go at topmost speed. + +[Illustration: OUTSIDE THE "PALL MALL" OFFICE.] + +He left me in the cab whilst he ran upstairs to the office in +Northumberland Street--I saw him going two steps at a time--and flung +himself into the office of Mr. Fyffe, an old and highly-esteemed member +of the _Times_ staff, who had joined Mr. Frederick Greenwood in the +editorial direction of the new development of the _Pall Mall_. What +Walter said to Fyffe I never learned in detail, but subsequently had +reason to guess he told him he had in the cab downstairs a young fellow +who was (or would be) one of the wonders of the journalistic world, and +that the morning edition of the _Pall Mall_ would have no chance unless +it secured his services. + +However it came about; whether Fyffe had some work in hand and was +anxious to be relieved from the embarrassing presence of his visitor +bounding all over the room in the enthusiasm of his advocacy; or +whether, as usually happens with a new paper, choice was limited, I was +engaged then and there as assistant sub-editor at the salary of four +guineas a week. I believe the regular average rate of remuneration was +five guineas. But I was young and inexperienced; and after living in the +Quartier Latin for nearly a year on fifteenpence a day, cultivating +French literature on _petits noirs_, four guineas a week was a +competency. "_Trois de cafe_" is what Daudet in his "_Trente ans de +Paris_" calls this sip of nectar. "_C'est a dire_," he explains, "_pour +trois sous d'un cafe savoureux balsamique raisonnablement edulcore_." +But Daudet must have frequented aristocratic quarters. At our _cremerie_ +we never paid more than two sous, and, bent on attaining luxury, we +demanded "_un petit noir_." + +When the paper started, Mr. Fyffe did the Parliamentary summary, of +which the _Pall Mall_ made a feature, placing it on the leader page. One +afternoon, after I had been on the staff for some six weeks, I looked in +at the office, and found it in a state of consternation. Fyffe had been +suddenly taken ill, and it was impossible for him to go down to the +House to do the summary. Mr. Greenwood sent for me and asked me to take +his place, for that night at least. To go down to the House of Commons +and take an ordinary "turn" of reporting for the first time is, I +suppose, a trying thing. To be bundled off at an hour's notice to fill +the place of one of the most eminent Parliamentary writers of the day, +and to supply a leading article on a subject of the surroundings of +which one was absolutely ignorant, might seem appalling. It all came +very naturally to me. I did my best in the strange, somewhat +bewildering, circumstances, and as long as the morning edition of the +_Pall Mall_ lasted, I continued to write its summary. Fyffe came round +again in a week; but he never more took up the summary, leaving it in my +hands, with many words of kind encouragement. + +It was in October, 1872, I joined the staff of the _Daily News_, having, +under Mr. Robinson's watchful eye, gone through a period of probation +as contributor of occasional articles descriptive of current events. I +might, in the ordinary course of events, have continued in that line, as +my friend and colleague Senior has done these twenty years, with honour +to himself and credit to the paper. But here, again, chance befell and +irresistibly led me back to the Press Gallery. In this very year a +change took place in a long-standing management of the _Daily News_ +Parliamentary corps and the writing of its summary, and Mr. Robinson +designated me as successor of the gentleman who retired. It was a +curious and, in some respects, a delicate position, seeing that I was, +compared with some members of the staff, a mere chicken in point of age. +There were three who had been on the paper since it started, any one of +whom might, had Fortune favoured me in that direction, have been my +grandfather. But we got along admirably, they easing my path with kindly +counsel and the friendliest consideration. + +[Illustration: MR. ROBINSON.] + +[Illustration: THREE OLD MEN.] + +It was different with some of the old hands on the other corps, who +bitterly resented the intrusion. I am not quite sure whether the two or +three who still survive have got over it yet. Certainly old "Charlie" +Ross, then and for some years after manager of the _Times_ staff, +carried the feeling to his honoured grave. After I had sat next but one +to him in the gallery for many Sessions he used, on encountering me in +the passage, to greet me with a startled expression, as if I were once +more an intruder, and would walk back to the outer doorkeeper (whom he +autocratically called Smeeth, because his name was Wright) to ask, +"Who's that?" + +Old Ross's personal affront in this matter probably dated back to the +Session of 1872, when I took an occasional turn for a friend who was a +member of his staff. This was young Latimer, son of the proprietor of +the _Western Daily Mercury_, who had been called to the Bar and +occasionally got a brief on the Western Circuit. When he went out of +town I became his substitute in respect of his Parliamentary duties. It +was Mr. Ross's custom of an afternoon to seat himself on the bench in +the ante-chamber of the Press Gallery, armed with a copy of the _Times_ +report of the day, with the "turns" all marked with the name of the man +who had written them. He genially spent the morning in reading the +prodigious collocation in search of errors. When found, these were made +a note of, the guilty person was sent for and had a more or less +pleasant quarter of an hour. This was called being "on the gridiron." + +I had only one experience of the process. Seated one day by command +beside this terrible old gentleman, he produced the marked passage +containing one of my turns, and pointing to the name, Mr. Ward Hunt, +fixed a glowering eye on me and said, with his slow intonation:-- + +"Who is 'Mr. Ward Hunt'?" + +"He is the member for North Northamptonshire," I timidly replied. + +"Oh!" he said, witheringly, "that's whom you mean. 'Ward Hunt'! Let me +tell you, sir, Ward Hunt may do very well for the penny papers, but in +the _Times_ report we write 'Mr. W. Hunt.'" + +I don't know why this should have been, since the burly gentleman, who +in the next Parliament was Chancellor of the Exchequer, was invariably +called by his full style. But then, as I have said, nobody knew why old +"Charlie" Ross dubbed Wright Smith, and pronounced it Smeeth. + +Gentlemen of the Press Gallery who now live at Westminster at ease, with +their library, their smoking-room, their choice of writing-out rooms, +their admirably-appointed and self-administered commissariat department, +little know the state of things that existed twenty years ago. Committee +Room No. 18 had then recently been appointed to their use as a +writing-room, providing it were not, when the House met, still in the +occupation of a Committee. But the writing-out rooms originally +apportioned, and then still in constant use, were two dark, +ill-ventilated dens which served as ante-chambers from the Press +Gallery. The _Times_ staff appropriated the room to the right, still +occupied by their telephonic service; the corresponding room to the left +being for general use. The room at the top of the stairs--where Wright +still presides and entrances the telegraph messengers with sententious +remarks on political, social, and philosophic affairs--was also used for +writing-out purposes, if a man could find a corner at the table at which +to sit. + +[Illustration: SMEETH.] + +This was difficult, since this closet, not bigger than a boot-room in an +ordinary household, was also sole dining-room attached to the Press +Gallery. In addition to his official duties at the door, Wright, in his +private capacity, added those of purveyor. Every Monday he brought down +(in two red cotton pocket-handkerchiefs, it was profanely said) a round +of cold boiled beef and a chunk of boiled ham; the latter tending, if +memory serves, rather towards the shank end. This, with bread, cheese, +and bottled beer, was the sole provision for the sustenance of the sixty +or seventy gentlemen who then composed the corps of the Press Gallery. +At that time it was more widely the practice to go out to dinner or +supper. But for those whose duties kept them in close attendance on the +gallery there was nothing for it but cold beef, cold ham, or an +amalgamation carefully doled forth. Many a night, seated at the little +table that still remains in this outer room, I have watched Wright +prepare my sumptuous repast. He was even then short-sighted, and to this +day I have vivid recollection of the concern with which I saw his nose +approach to dangerous contiguity of the round of beef as he leaned over +it to cut a slice with judicious thinness. + +[Illustration: CUTTING THE BEEF.] + +[Illustration: LORD CHARLES RUSSELL.] + +Even this accommodation was regarded askance by the constitutional +authorities of the House, still accustomed to regard the Press as an +intruder happily subject, under the beneficent regulations of the Stuart +days, to instant expulsion if any member pleased to take note of the +presence of its representatives. In 1867, a Committee sat to consider +the general arrangements of the House. The reporters, greatly daring, +took the opportunity of laying before it a statement of their +grievances, and asked for fuller convenience for carrying on their work. +Lord Charles Russell, then Serjeant-at-Arms, was, very properly, +astonished at their unreasonableness, and plaintively deplored the times +when, as he put it, reporters seemed to require only the necessaries of +life, not presuming to lift their eyes to its luxuries. + +"They used, I am told," Lord Charles added, "to have just a glass of +water and biscuits, or anything of that sort. Now they have their tea at +the back of the gallery." + +[Illustration: MR. DAVID PLUNKET.] + +Oliver Twist asking for more scarcely reached the height of the audacity +of these reporters in 1867. Like Mr. Bumble, the Serjeant-at-Arms of the +day literally gasped in dismayed astonishment. + +All this is changed. Thanks to the courtesy and reasonableness of +successive First Commissioners of Works, of whom Mr. David Plunket was +not the least forward in doing good, the arrangements in connection with +the Press Gallery of to-day leave nothing to be desired. + +Of the changes that have taken place in the House itself, and of the +ghosts that flit about the benches where twenty years ago they sat in +flesh and bone, I shall have something to say next month. + + * * * * * + +[IMPORTANT NOTICE.--_Companion to the STRAND MAGAZINE. Now Selling. To +be obtained of all Booksellers and Newsagents. THE PICTURE MAGAZINE, +Price Sixpence, Monthly. This new publication, issued from the offices +of "The Strand," contains nothing but pictures, and forms an Art +Magazine for the General Public. Features:--Fine Art Portraits, Curious +Pictures, Humorous Pictures, Pictures of Places, Pictures for Children, +etc., etc._] + + + + +_A Child's Tear._ + +[Illustration] + +THE DRAMATIST'S STORY. + +FROM THE FRENCH OF EDOUARD LEMOINE. + + +In a Parisian green-room a new performer was complaining of nervousness. +From some of her companions she received encouragement, but the majority +expressed themselves after this fashion: "Such tremors are incurable. As +nature has formed us, bold or timid, cold or ardent, grave or gay, so we +must remain. Whoever saw an ambitious man cured of his ambition, or a +miser of his avarice?" + +Some members of the company objected to the fatalism of these +observations, and one said: "If you ask for a converted miser, I can +show you one. Here he is! _I_ am one." + +The man who said this was a popular dramatist, noted for generosity. His +statement was received with ejaculations of "Nonsense!" "Impossible!" +"Do you expect us to believe that?" "Indeed," answered he, quite +seriously, "I speak the truth. I _was_ a miser, although now, I trust, I +am such no longer. If you would care to hear it, I will relate to you +the story of my conversion. It was effected by _a child's tear_." All +present immediately crowded around him, and heard from his lips the +following recital:-- + +"In 1834," said the dramatist, "I had just given to the theatre of the +Porte-Saint-Martin one of the most successful of my pieces. One day +about that time two letters reached me by the same post. Both were from +Marseilles. One was from a theatrical manager, informing me that he +intended bringing out my new piece there, and that he desired my +presence at the final rehearsals of the drama. With regard to +remuneration for my trouble, I might make my own terms in reason. The +second letter, a very brief one, ran thus: 'Monsieur, the wife and +daughter of your brother are dying of want. Some hundreds of francs +would save them, and I doubt not that you will hasten to visit +connexions so near to you, and make arrangements for their present and +future comfort.' This letter bore the signature of Dr. Lambert, of +Marseilles. + +"As I have already told you, I was a miser in the worst sense of the +word. The physician's letter, far from moving me to pity, merely +renewed certain angry feelings which had formerly existed in my mind +towards my sister-in-law. When, some years back, my brave sailor +brother, who had since been drowned, had written to tell me of his +approaching marriage with a fisherman's daughter, I, in my miserable +pride and miserliness, had replied that in marrying a penniless girl, I +considered that he was doing a most foolish and degrading action. I was +even wretch enough to advise him to break off the match, if that were +still possible. My brother, like the honourable man he was, wedded the +girl he loved. My sister-in-law, who was a high-spirited Breton, never +forgot my letter, and despised its writer. When she lost her husband, +and found herself in need, it was long ere she could bring herself to +apply to me. But the sight of her only child wasting away from sheer +want, had at last broken down her pride. + +[Illustration: "NEAR THE INVALID'S BED STOOD HER LITTLE GIRL."] + +"As the engagement at the Marseilles theatre seemed likely to prove a +highly profitable one, I, as you might expect, lost no time in accepting +the offer. I wrote off to the manager at once, and followed my letter in +person with as little delay as possible. When I arrived at the principal +hotel of Marseilles, I encountered there, in the act of inquiring for +me, the doctor who had written on my sister-in-law's behalf. As I had +not replied to his letter, the good man had said in his simplicity: 'He +will be here in person,' and had looked for me every day. 'You have lost +no time, sir,' said he. 'Doubtless you thought, and rightly, that did +you delay, death might forestall you. Ah! I am indeed glad to see you!' + +"I was completely nonplussed. My sole object in visiting Marseilles had +been the professional one; but how could I avow such a fact to such a +man? For very shame I could not do so. Accordingly, instead of going +straight to the theatre, as I had intended doing, I walked away with the +doctor to my sister-in-law's poor abode. + +"It was a most wretched room. Yet the first object in it that caught my +eye was a very beautiful one. Near the invalid's bed stood her little +girl, with large black eyes, pretty curly hair, and a face whose +expression was a pathetic combination of youthful brightness and +premature sadness. At the first glance I could have taken the lovely +creature into my arms; then I sternly repressed this alien emotion. The +doctor, after he had spoken a few words to his patient, beckoned me to +approach. As I did so the poor woman tried to raise herself. The mixture +of sadness and pride upon her faded countenance told me plainly how +great an effort it had cost her to appeal to me. Using the strongest +plea that she knew, she pointed to her child with weak, trembling +finger, and said in low tones: 'See here! She will soon be alone in the +world.' + +"Even this touching appeal produced (I blush to say it) no effect upon +my hard heart. I answered coldly: 'Why give way to such fears? You are +young; you have a good physician; why lose all hope?' A less selfish man +would have added: 'You have a brother-in-law also, who means to do his +best for you.' But _I_ said nothing of the sort. My only thought was how +I might most easily escape from the threatened burden. The little girl, +who had been gazing at me with wondering eyes, now came to my side, and +said: 'Will you, please, sit upon the bed? Because you are too tall for +me to kiss you if you stand.' + +"I sat down, and the child climbed upon my knee. Her mother's eyes were +closed, and her hands were clasped together as if in prayer. +Unaffrighted by my black looks, the little one threw her arms around my +neck, and pressed her lips to my cheek. 'Will you be my papa?' said she. +'I will love you so dearly! You are like papa. He was very good. Are +_you_ good, too?' My only answer was to unclasp her arms somewhat +roughly from my neck, and set her down upon the floor. She cast upon me +a glance of mingled surprise, disappointment, and fear, and a tear +rolled slowly down her cheek. Her silent sorrow worked the miracle that +her pretty, fond prattle had failed to effect. As by an enchanter's +wand, the ugliness of my character, the utter brutality of my conduct +was revealed to me in that moment. I shuddered in horror and +self-disgust, and yielded at once to my good angel. I lifted the +disconsolate little maiden into my arms, and, laying my hand upon her +head, said: 'Yes, my child, I promise to be a father to you; you shall +be my dear little daughter, and I will love and take care of you +always.' + +[Illustration: "I lifted the little maiden into my arms."] + +"How happy this promise made my sister-in-law words fail me to describe. +Her joyful excitement alarmed both the physician and myself. Joy, +however, seldom kills. 'Brother! brother!' she murmured; 'how my +thoughts have wronged you! Forgive me!' Her gratitude stung my +newly-awakened conscience more sharply than any reproach could have +done. I hastened to change the subject to that of the sick woman's +removal to a better dwelling. The doctor, with ready kindness, undertook +the task of house-hunting, for which I, a stranger to the place, was not +so well qualified. + +"He found for us a delightful cottage in the neighbourhood of +Marseilles. There we three--my sister-in-law, my niece, and +myself--lived for three months. At the end of that time the mother +passed peacefully away, leaving her child to my care, with full +confidence in my affection. Marie has been with me ever since. Her joys +have been my joys, her life has been my life. Do I not owe her much? +That tear of hers--a precious pearl gathered by my heart--has been to it +what the dewdrop of morn is to the unopened flower--expanding it for the +entire day of its existence!" + + + + +_The Queer Side of Things._ + +THE DWINDLING HOUR. + +A STORY OF IMPRESSION AND CONVICTION; BEING, POSSIBLY, A TRUE WORD +SPOKEN IN JEST. + + +I. + +[Illustration] + +"In an hour," sang the minstrel to his harp, whose frame was the curved +black horn of a deer--"in an hour thy forefather strode from this spot +whereon we sit to the summit of yon blue hill; and there, as the sinking +sun would bend to caress his feet (as grovels a vanquished foe), he +would touch its face with his hand in token of friendliness. 'Twixt +dawning of day and noon would thy great forefather slay three hundred +red-eyed wolves--one hundred shuffling bears! + +"In a day did he carve and hew this bowl from the hardest rock, and +fashion and form it thus; and bore a hole in its base for the water to +trickle and ooze, and number the hours that sped!" + +Then up rose the hunter to whom he sang; and broad was his chest, and +active his limb; and he cried aloud, "What my forefather did that will I +do; in an hour will I stride from here to the summit of yon blue hill." + +And those that sat around, listening, laughed from their deep chests, +shouting in mockery; for the blue hill was a day's journey away. + +Then in anger the chief clutched his spear of flint; and he cried to +them, "Fill up the bowl to the mark that marks an hour, and fill it up +again till the two hours mark is reached; and ere the last drop is out +will I stand on yon blue hill; and moisten my hand in the bowl." + +Then turned he his face to the West, and, striding, stood on the cairn +that capped the blue hill; and, returning, plunged his hand in the bowl: +and, lo! his finger was moistened by the last drop ere it dripped from +the hole at the base! + +Then those that sat around sent up a shout of mockery; and they said, +"Lo, since you strode away hath the red sun set on the hill, and hath +risen again from the lake; and is stooping to set once more!" + +"Then," cried he, "your words are a lie; for the clock but marks two +hours." + +But the others cried in their turn, "The marks in the bowl were made to +number, not hours, but _days_!" + +But the minstrel answered them, "Nay; they were made to number the +hours--the hours of the distant past; the hours that were long as days." + +Then the younger among them laughed, and held it a minstrel's myth; but +the elders, pondering, cried, "These words of the singer are sooth; for +the days that whiten our beards are passing in greater haste than the +days that lengthened our limbs!" + +But the younger among them said, "The hole in the bowl is clogged; it +should run twelve times as fast." + +And they bored the hole in the base till the water dripped more +fast--twelve drops to the former one--and numbered the hours that +passed. + +And, wreathed in the grey of the mist that crept from the breast of the +lake, the soul of the hero of old, of him who had fashioned the clock, +looked down on them while they wrought: and vainly it strove to speak, +and tell of the truth it knew; but voice and a tongue to speak would it +lack for ages to come, for never a voice or tongue would it have till +its hour arrived to dwell in the flesh once more; and then, and never +till then, should it tell of the truth it knew. + + +II. + +And, behold, on a day certain men journeyed toward Egypt, and this was +that land of Egypt that should thereafter be mighty exceedingly; for +these were the days before the First Dynasty--yea, many thousands of +years before. And, it being nigh unto the time of the setting of the +sun, they happened, by adventure, upon a cavern. + +And they that journeyed toward the land of Egypt spake, saying, Shall we +not lay down our burthens, and shall we not take the burthens from off +our camels and from off our asses in this place, and abide for the day +in this place, even here? + +And they lay down their burthens even as they had spoken, saying, Shall +we not lay them down? Also they took the burthens from off their camels +and from off the backs of their asses, yea, and even from off the backs +of their wives; and did tether them, even their camels and their asses +and their wives, round about the cavern; and the men that journeyed +toward the land of Egypt entered in unto the cavern, where there was +shade, and washed their feet, and rested in the heat of the day. + +And it came to pass, while they that journeyed toward the land of Egypt +rested in the cavern in the heat of the day, that they found a bowl in +the cavern, and the bowl was of hard stone; even hewn from the hardest +rock; and in the base of the bowl was a hole; and they that journeyed +toward the land of Egypt marvelled at the bowl. + +[Illustration: "They marvelled at the bowl."] + +And behold, a certain man of them that was a wise man spake, saying, +This is a clock at which ye marvel; for hath it not marks upon the inner +side, even on the inward surface thereof, and were these marks not made +to show the hours, by the dripping of the water from the hole that is at +the bottom of the bowl, even the under side thereof? + +But they cried out upon him, saying, This is no true thing that you +speak, neither is it the fact: for the water would abide in the bowl, +between one mark and another, for the space of more than an hour; yea, +even more than two or three hours! + +Then they cried out all together that the bowl should be filled with +water; howbeit they said, Behold there is not in this cavern water +sufficient to fill the bowl; for have we not emptied the water-skins +that the women did fill at the well and did carry here; and is not the +well distant from this place, even many paces of a camel? + +And there was none among them that would arise and go in the heat of the +day to fetch the water that was in the well; but he that was wise among +them spake, saying:-- + +Shall not our wives, even those that are tethered outside the cavern +round about it--shall not one of these go unto the well and fill the +bowl at the well, and bring it hither filled with the water that is in +the well? + +So they that journeyed toward the land of Egypt called out to the wives +that they should enter in and fetch the bowl; and should fill it at the +well, even as they had spoken. + +And it came to pass when the bowl was filled and set in their midst, +that the water that was in the bowl, by reason of its dripping so slowly +from the hole that was at the bottom of the bowl, abode in the bowl +between one mark and another the space of three hours by the shadow of a +spear that was set up outside the cavern. + +So they that journeyed toward the land of Egypt, even they that lay in +the cavern, cried, saying, Behold, is it not even as we said, saying, +The water will abide in the bowl between one mark and another for the +space of more than an hour; and hath it not abode there the space of +three hours? + +But he that was wise among them said unto them, Nay, but for a certainty +these marks that are in the bowl were made for the marking of the space +of an hour; howbeit the hours that were at the time of the making of +this bowl, were they not of the space of three hours, even of three of +the hours of the present time? + +Then they that were aged and well stricken in years among them that lay +in the cavern in the heat of the day, these communed with themselves for +a space; and they spake, saying, Verily thus, and thus it seemeth unto +us; that the space of the passing of the hours that behold the whiteness +of our beards is verily shorter than the space of the passing of the +hours that did behold the increasing of our statures in the tents of our +fathers! And it seemed unto them even so, that this saying was true. + +[Illustration: _Honour to thee, King Ammon, mighty as Pthah the god, son +of Osiris, to whom libations! A bowl wrought of hard stone set up at the +temple of Isis marking the time._] + +But they that were young among them, even the young men, scoffed, +saying, The hole that is at the bottom of the bowl is clogged by reason +of dirt that is within the hole: shall we not, therefore, bore out the +hole, to the end that the water that is within the bowl shall drip +faster, even three times as fast; and shall set forth the hours? + +So they that were young did according to that saying; and they bored the +hole round about, until the water that was within the bowl dripped out +three times as fast. + +And they rejoiced, saying, Behold, now it is a good and useful clock! +And they bore the bowl with them into the land of Egypt; four wives and +an ass carried the bowl in their turns--the four women for a space, and +the ass for a space--until they came to the land of Egypt; and the clock +was set up in the land of Egypt. And this was in the days before the +First Dynasty; yea, many thousands of years before. And behold, the +spirit of him that had wrought the bowl followed after the bowl, even +unto the land of Egypt; for the spirit was filled with a great and +exceeding desire to speak those things that were known unto it; yet the +time of its speaking was not yet. + + +III. + +In the days of Amun-Ta-Ra, in the Fifth Dynasty, in the year of the +Altering of the Clock. Glory to thee, Amun. + +In that year, after his return from the war with many captives, did +Amun-Ta-Ra order the greater hollowing of the hole at bottom of the +clock set up before the temple of Isis telling the hours. + +The clock too slowly dripping, the hole being in part stopped, showing +the hours too long, was altered. One hour in the space of two did it +count. Let Amun-Ta-Ra live. + + +IV. + +Young Reuben scraped off his boots the worst of the mud from the furrows +against the gate-post, shut the gate, and trudged homewards from his +labour; as he turned into the road from the end of the lane he came in +sight of old Reuben, sitting as usual on his heap of stones by the +roadside; his hammer lay idly in his hand, its head on the heap of +larger flints before him; the old gentleman was slowly shaking his +head--not that he was such a very old gentleman; sixty, maybe; and still +hale and strong. + +"What be amiss, father?" said young Reuben. "Ye've bin a-settin' there +shakin' yer head like a old owl since I turned into the road. It be time +to knock off." + +"Amiss, Reuben? Why, thet's where you have me, like. What I know is, +there be a somethin' amiss; and it be either me or the time, and so I +tell ye. Am I a-gettin' old an' weak, boy; or is it the hours a-goin' +quicker? Lookee here, Reuben, it do seem to me as I can do less in the +time every blessed day as follers t'other! Why, thirty year agone, +blest if I didn't do--ah, double thet there little 'eap in the day's +work--and yet, blame me if I feel a bit weaker nor I used ter! You mark +my words, Reuben, boy; the hours is a-gettin' shorter every day--thet's +what they're a-doin', and you put it down at thet!" + +Young Reuben laughed incredulously. "You're a-gittin' lazy, old +'un--that's about the size of it," he said. + +[Illustration: 'Young Reuben laughed.'] + +"I hain't a-gettin' nothink o' the kind nor discripshen!" said old +Reuben, starting up indignantly; "and you put it down at thet." + +"Well, lazy or not lazy, I ken show ye a stone as you ain't industrous +enough fer to break. Found it in a furrer, I did; an' talk about 'ard! +And a fair rum 'un he be, too." + +They plodded to the field young Reuben had just left; and young Reuben, +with some difficulty, lifted the "stone" for inspection. It was a bowl, +very ancient by the look of it, laboriously carved and ground out from a +piece of rock that seemed as hard as steel. + +"A rum 'un he be, too, and right you are," said old Reuben. "A +wash-bowl, likely." + +"What be that 'ole in the bottom fer, then?" said young Reuben. + +"Why, fer to empty him, that be, as a pig might see with 'is eyes shet." + +They carried the bowl home, and a pretty good weight they found it. + +Old Jim Pedler came along that evening to have a pipe. Jim Pedler had +been about a deal here and there, and he knew a lot. + +"Why, whatee got theer?" said he. + +"Mebbe ye'll know that better ner us," replied old Reuben. "Some kind +o'wash-basin, so we seem to reckon it be." + +"Wash-basin," said old Jim Pedler. "That's jest what it been't. I tellee +now, I do think as it's some kind of old sort of water-clock, an' that's +what I think. Why, see here now, if there ain't bin lines 'ere inside +fer to mark the hours or somethin'. That's it--it be a water-clock. +S'pose we gits some water an' tries it." + +They cleared out the hole at the bottom and filled the bowl with water +up to the first hour mark; and, old Jim Pedler having a watch, they sat +and looked on as the water dripped out; but when they had sat and smoked +for two hours the bowl was still far from empty. + +"'Twern't never meant to reckon hours by, that's a moral," said young +Reuben. + +"Thet's more ner _you_ knows," replied old Reuben. "What der _you_ know +about folks's hours as lived ages ago? You jest let other folks's hours +alone, as p'raps knowed better ner you. Mebbe their hours _was_ +longer--what did I say this wery day about the hours a-bein' shorter now +than wot they was thirty year agone? But I tell yer wot: it 'ud make a +notionable kind of clock if we was to bore the 'ole a bit bigger and +jest manage to git it right for the hours." + +So they drilled and filed and tried to chip; and after much labour they +made the hole large enough to let out the water from one mark to the +next in sixty minutes. + +And all the while there hovered around them, invisible, the spirit of +him that fashioned the bowl, longing to speak what it knew; but its time +for returning to the flesh was not yet--but it was coming. + + +V. + +The nineteenth century was ancient history, when one day, in a +breathless, hurrying world, a busy City man was borne electrically home +to his suburban villa one hundred miles from the City. + +[Illustration: "They sat and smoked for two hours."] + +He was tired and morose, and a settled worry clouded his face. + +"What is it to-day, John?" asked his wife. "Done nothing again?" + +[Illustration: "What is it to-day, John?"] + +"Nothing," replied the City man, wearily. "Absolutely nothing. Got up at +seven--hurried like mad over dressing and breakfast, and managed to get +through them by ten, and rush to town--got to town at twelve-thirty, and +sat down to write one short letter--finished that by two--saw Brown +about the cargo, and said a few words to him by four-thirty--read a +telegram and two letters, fast as I could read, by five-thirty--gave +instructions, about twenty words, to chief clerk by seven--dashed home +again like lightning, and now it's nearly ten! My dear, this _can't_ go +on! The day is over before one has time to breathe! There is no time for +anything. It's all very well to say we live a hundred years now against +the seventy of a thousand years ago; but I'm convinced the years have +grown shorter. Why--just fancy, Maria--when I was a boy we used to have +time between sunrise and sunset to write out one hundred and fifty lines +of Virgil, or row three miles on the river. Why, I saw in a very old +newspaper in the Museum lately, that an athlete could once run a mile on +the cinder path in four minutes seventeen seconds; and it can't be done +now by a champion under twenty-five minutes! Halloa! here's the carrier +brought that curious old water-clock I bought at the antiquity shop +yesterday.... You see those faint lines inside? They were to mark the +hours--hours, though--no! I'm sure the water would never drip through +that little hole fast enough to sink one of those measurements in an +hour. Let's try.... Halloa! While I've been talking it's got to one +o'clock a.m.; and we haven't had time for dinner to-day--I mean +yesterday. Maria! this _can't_ go on! It's killing!" + +Next Sunday the City man tried the water-clock, and it took five hours +and three-quarters for it to register an hour; so he had the hole at the +bottom made larger--of more than five times its former capacity; and it +registered the hours. + +And the spirit of him that had fashioned it hovered ever about the +clock, waiting to speak what it knew; and its time was soon to come. + +[Illustration: MONDAY MORNING] + + +VI. + +And the City man had grown old; and his son was the City man now. And on +the morning of Monday he would arise from bed and shave, and wash, and +dress; and when he had done these things it was Monday night, and he sat +down and ate his breakfast; and when he had finished his breakfast and +drawn on his boots, it was Tuesday morning; and when he had hurried to +town, it was Tuesday night; and when he had opened one letter and one +telegram, and said ten words to his clerk, it was Wednesday night; and +when he had dashed back home, it was Thursday morning; and when he had +eaten his dinner, it was Friday morning; and then a short glance at the +newspaper brought him to Friday night; and then into bed by Saturday +morning, to sleep until Monday morning. + +And he became an elderly man; and now he would arise from bed on the +Monday morning, and when he had washed and dressed, it was Tuesday +morning; and when he had eaten his breakfast, it was Wednesday morning; +so he could not go to town, as there was not time in the week. And men +sat down dazed and paralyzed, for there was no time to do anything. And +each week they enlarged the hole in the water-clock; and at the end of +each week it dripped too slowly, and fell behind. + +And a new Astronomer-Royal was appointed; and in him was the soul, +re-incarnated, of him who had fashioned the clock in the dusk of +pre-historic ages; and at last he could tell what he knew. + +[Illustration] + +And he told all men that the thing they had felt was true: he told them +how, for many thousands of years, the earth and all the universe had +revolved ever faster and faster; all with proportionate increase of +velocity, so that the circuit of the moon kept its wonted time with the +revolution of the earth; and the comets came and went at their expected +seasons, as also occurred the eclipses; so that no man could know that +which was taking place, but only guess. And now each day they enlarged +the hole in the water-clock; until the bowl was growing to be _all_ +hole; and now they could not bore fast enough in the hard stone; and +now---- + + J. F. SULLIVAN. + + + + +PAL'S PUZZLE PAGE + +[Illustration: FIND JOHN BULL'S 3 DAUGHTERS] + +[Illustration: FIND JONATHAN'S 3 DAUGHTERS] + +[Illustration: FIND BUFFALO BILL.] + + + + +MANDRAKE ROOTS. + +[Illustration: FRONT VIEW.] + +[Illustration: BACK VIEW.] + +[Illustration: FRONT VIEW.] + +[Illustration: BACK VIEW.] + + +The accompanying illustrations represent specimens of the mandragora +(mandrake) root, which is found in some parts of Asia Minor and Syria. +Many of these roots take the form of human beings, especially from the +hips downward, and all have more or less the shape of a man or woman; +one of the specimens resembling a woman carrying a child under each arm. +The peasants relate that when the roots are pulled up out of the ground +they utter cries or shrieks like a person in pain. The roots are still +used for spells and other witchcraft. For these specimens we are +indebted to Mr. A. Caillard, Ramleh, Alexandria, Egypt. + +[Illustration: CLOAKS AND] + +[Illustration: OVER COATS OF ALL TIME] + +[Illustration: THE HUNTER AND THE BIRD.] + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Strand Magazine, Volume V, Issue +25, January 1893, by Various + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STRAND MAGAZINE, JANUARY 1893 *** + +***** This file should be named 29911.txt or 29911.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/2/9/9/1/29911/ + +Produced by Victorian/Edwardian Pictorial Magazines, +Jonathan Ingram, Josephine Paolucci and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net. + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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