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diff --git a/2983-0.txt b/2983-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..db3d6f1 --- /dev/null +++ b/2983-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,9633 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of Mark Twain, A Biography, Vol. 1, Part 2, 1866-1875, by Albert Bigelow Paine + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most +other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions +whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of +the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at +www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have +to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. + +Title: Mark Twain, A Biography, Vol. 1, Part 2, 1866-1875 + +Author: Albert Bigelow Paine + +Release Date: December, 2001 [EBook #2983] +[Most recently updated: June 1, 2020] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY *** + + + + +Produced by David Widger + + + + + MARK TWAIN A BIOGRAPHY + + THE PERSONAL AND LITERARY LIFE OF SAMUEL LANGHORNE CLEMENS + + BY ALBERT BIGELOW PAINE + + + CONTENTS + + VOLUME I, Part 2: 1866-1875 + + LIV. + THE LECTURER + + LV. + HIGHWAY ROBBERY + + LVI. + BACK TO THE STATES + + LVII. + OLD FRIENDS AND NEW PLANS + + LVIII. + A NEW BOOK AND A LECTURE + + LIX. + THE FIRST BOOK + + LX. + THE INNOCENTS AT SEA + + LXI. + THE INNOCENTS ABROAD + + LXII. + THE RETURN OF THE PILGRIMS + + LXIII. + IN WASHINGTON—A PUBLISHING PROPOSITION + + LXIV. + OLIVIA LANGDON + + LXV. + A CONTRACT WITH ELISHA BLISS, JR. + + LXVI. + BACK TO SAN FRANCISCO + + LXVII. + A VISIT TO ELMIRA + + LXVIII. + THE REV. “JOE” TWICHELL. + + LXIX. + A LECTURE TOUR + + LXX. + INNOCENTS AT HOME—AND “THE INNOCENTS ABROAD” + + LXXI. + THE GREAT BOOK OF TRAVEL. + + LXXII. + THE PURCHASE OF A PAPER. + + LXXIII. + THE FIRST MEETING WITH HOWELLS + + LXXIV. + THE WEDDING-DAY + + LXXV. + AS TO DESTINY + + LXXVI. + ON THE BUFFALO “EXPRESS” + + LXXVII. + THE “GALAXY” + + LXXVIII. + THE PRIMROSE PATH + + LXXIX. + THE OLD HUMAN STORY + + LXXX. + LITERARY PROJECTS + + LXXXI. + SOME FURTHER LITERARY MATTERS + + LXXXII. + THE WRITING OF “ROUGHING IT” + + LXXXIII. + LECTURING DAYS + + LXXXIV. + "ROUGHING IT”. + + LXXXV. + A BIRTH, A DEATH, AND A VOYAGE + + LXXXVI. + ENGLAND + + LXXXVII. + THE BOOK THAT WAS NEVER WRITTEN + + LXXXVIII. + "THE GILDED AGE” + + LXXXIX. + PLANNING A NEW HOME + + XC. + A LONG ENGLISH HOLIDAY + + XCI. + A LONDON LECTURE + + XCII. + FURTHER LONDON LECTURE TRIUMPHS + + XCIII. + THE REAL COLONEL SELLERS-GOLDEN DAYS + + XCIV. + BEGINNING “TOM SAWYER” + + XCV. + AN “ATLANTIC” STORY AND A PLAY + + XCVI. + THE NEW HOME + + XCVII. + THE WALK TO BOSTON + + XCVIII. + "OLD TIMES ON THE MISSISSIPPI” + + XCIX. + A TYPEWRITER, AND A JOKE ON ALDRICH + + C. + RAYMOND, MENTAL TELEGRAPHY, ETC. + + CI. + CONCLUDING “TOM SAWYER”—MARK TWAIN's “EDITORS” + + CII. + "SKETCHES NEW AND OLD” + + CIII. + "ATLANTIC” DAYS + + CIV. + MARK TWAIN AND HIS WIFE + + + + + VOLUME I, Part 2: 1866-1875 + + LIV. THE LECTURER + + + It was not easy to take up the daily struggle again, but it was + necessary.—[Clemens once declared he had been so blue at this + period that one morning he put a loaded pistol to his head, but + found he lacked courage to pull the trigger.]—Out of the ruck of + possibilities (his brain always thronged with plans) he + constructed three or four resolves. The chief of these was the + trip around the world; but that lay months ahead, and in the mean + time ways and means must be provided. Another intention was to + finish the Hornet article, and forward it to Harper's Magazine—a + purpose carried immediately into effect. To his delight the + article found acceptance, and he looked forward to the day of its + publication as the beginning of a real career. He intended to + follow it up with a series on the islands, which in due time + might result in a book and an income. He had gone so far as to + experiment with a dedication for the book—an inscription to his + mother, modified later for use in 'The Innocents Abroad'. A third + plan of action was to take advantage of the popularity of the + Hawaiian letters, and deliver a lecture on the same subject. But + this was a fearsome prospect—he trembled when he thought of it. + As Governor of the Third House he had been extravagantly received + and applauded, but in that case the position of public + entertainer had been thrust upon him. To come forward now, + offering himself in the same capacity, was a different matter. He + believed he could entertain, but he lacked the courage to declare + himself; besides, it meant a risk of his slender capital. He + confided his situation to Col. John McComb, of the Alta + California, and was startled by McComb's vigorous endorsement. + + “Do it, by all means!” urged McComb. “It will be a grand + success—I know it! Take the largest house in town, and charge a + dollar a ticket.” + + Frightened but resolute, he went to the leading theater manager + the same Tom Maguire of his verses—and was offered the new + opera-house at half rates. The next day this advertisement + appeared: + + MAGUIRE'S ACADEMY OF MUSIC PINE STREET, NEAR MONTGOMERY + THE SANDWICH ISLANDS + MARK TWAIN + (HONOLULU CORRESPONDENT OF THE SACRAMENTO UNION) WILL DELIVER A + LECTURE ON THE SANDWICH ISLANDS + AT THE ACADEMY OF MUSIC ON TUESDAY EVENING, OCT. 2d + (1866) + In which passing mention will be made of Harris, Bishop Staley, the + American missionaries, etc., and the absurd customs and + characteristics of the natives duly discussed and described. The + great volcano of Kilauea will also receive proper attention. + A SPLENDID ORCHESTRA is in town, but has not been + engaged ALSO A DEN OF FEROCIOUS WILD BEASTS will be + on exhibition in the next block MAGNIFICENT FIREWORKS + were in contemplation for this occasion, but the idea has been + abandoned A GRAND TORCHLIGHT PROCESSION may be expected; in fact, the + public are privileged to expect whatever they please. + Dress Circle, $1.00 Family Circle, 50c Doors open at 7 + o'clock The Trouble to begin at 8 o'clock + + The story of that first lecture, as told in Roughing It, is a + faithful one, and need only be summarized here. + + Expecting to find the house empty, he found it packed from the + footlights to the walls. Sidling out from the wings—wobbly-kneed + and dry of tongue—he was greeted by a murmur, a roar, a very + crash of applause that frightened away his remaining vestiges of + courage. Then, came reaction—these were his friends, and he began + to talk to them. Fear melted away, and as tide after tide of + applause rose and billowed and came breaking at his feet, he knew + something of the exaltation of Monte Cristo when he declared “The + world is mine!” + + It was a vast satisfaction to have succeeded. It was particularly + gratifying at this time, for he dreaded going back into newspaper + harness. Also; it softened later the disappointment resulting + from another venture; for when the December Harper appeared, with + his article, the printer and proof-reader had somehow converted + Mark Twain into “Mark Swain,” and his literary dream perished. + + As to the literary value of his lecture, it was much higher than + had, been any portion of his letters, if we may judge from its + few remaining fragments. One of these—a part of the description + of the great volcano Haleakala, on the island of Maui—is a fair + example of his eloquence. + + It is somewhat more florid than his later description of the same + scene in Roughing It, which it otherwise resembles; and we may + imagine that its poetry, with the added charm of its delivery, + held breathless his hearers, many of whom believed that no purer + eloquence had ever been uttered or written. + + It is worth remembering, too, that in this lecture, delivered so + long ago, he advocated the idea of American ownership of these + islands, dwelling at considerable length on his reasons for this + ideal. —[For fragmentary extracts from this first lecture of Mark + Twain and news comment, see Appendix D, end of last + volume.]—There was a gross return from his venture of more than + $1,200, but with his usual business insight, which was never + foresight, he had made an arrangement by which, after paying + bills and dividing with his manager, he had only about one-third + of, this sum left. Still, even this was prosperity and triumph. + He had acquired a new and lucrative profession at a bound. The + papers lauded him as the “most piquant and humorous writer and + lecturer on the Coast since the days of the lamented John + Phoenix.” He felt that he was on the highroad at last. + + Denis McCarthy, late of the Enterprise, was in San Francisco, and + was willing to become his manager. Denis was capable and honest, + and Clemens was fond of him. They planned a tour of the near-by + towns, beginning with Sacramento, extending it later even to the + mining camps, such as Red Dog and Grass Valley; also across into + Nevada, with engagements at Carson City, Virginia, and Gold Hill. + It was an exultant and hilarious excursion—that first lecture + tour made by Denis McCarthy and Mark Twain. Success traveled with + them everywhere, whether the lecturer looked across the + footlights of some pretentious “opera-house” or between the two + tallow candles of some camp “academy.” Whatever the building, it + was packed, and the returns were maximum. + + Those who remember him as a lecturer in that long-ago time say + that his delivery was more quaint, his drawl more exaggerated, + even than in later life; that his appearance and movements on the + stage were natural, rather than graceful; that his manuscript, + which he carried under his arm, looked like a ruffled hen. It + was, in fact, originally written on sheets of manila paper, in + large characters, so that it could be read easily by dim light, + and it was doubtless often disordered. + + There was plenty of amusing experience on this tour. At one + place, when the lecture was over, an old man came to him and + said: + + “Be them your natural tones of eloquence?” + + At Grass Valley there was a rival show, consisting of a lady + tight-rope walker and her husband. It was a small place, and the + tight-rope attraction seemed likely to fail. The lady's husband + had formerly been a compositor on the Enterprise, so that he felt + there was a bond of brotherhood between him and Mark Twain. + + “Look here,” he said. “Let's combine our shows. I'll let my wife + do the tight-rope act outside and draw a crowd, and you go inside + and lecture.” + + The arrangement was not made. + + Following custom, the lecturer at first thought it necessary to + be introduced, and at each place McCarthy had to skirmish around + and find the proper person. At Red Dog, on the Stanislaus, the + man selected failed to appear, and Denis had to provide another + on short notice. He went down into the audience and captured an + old fellow, who ducked and dodged but could not escape. Denis led + him to the stage, a good deal frightened. + + “Ladies and gentlemen,” he said, “this is the celebrated Mark + Twain from the celebrated city of San Francisco, with his + celebrated lecture about the celebrated Sandwich Islands.” + + That was as far as he could go; but it was far enough. Mark Twain + never had a better introduction. The audience was in a shouting + humor from the start. + + Clemens himself used to tell of an introduction at another camp, + where his sponsor said: + + “Ladies and gentlemen, I know only two things about this man: the + first is that he's never been in jail, and the second is I don't + know why.” + + But this is probably apocryphal; there is too much “Mark Twain” + in it. + + When he reached Virginia, Goodman said to him: + + “Sam, you do not need anybody to introduce you. There's a piano + on the stage in the theater. Have it brought out in sight, and + when the curtain rises you be seated at the piano, playing and + singing that song of yours, 'I Had an Old Horse Whose Name Was + Methusalem,' and don't seem to notice that the curtain is up at + first; then be surprised when you suddenly find out that it is + up, and begin talking, without any further preliminaries.” + + This proved good advice, and the lecture, thus opened, started + off with general hilarity and applause. + + + + + LV. HIGHWAY ROBBERY + + + His Nevada, lectures were bound to be immensely successful. The + people regarded him as their property over there, and at Carson + and Virginia the houses overflowed. At Virginia especially his + friends urged and begged him to repeat the entertainment, but he + resolutely declined. + + “I have only one lecture yet,” he said. “I cannot bring myself to + give it twice in the same town.” + + But that irresponsible imp, Steve Gillis, who was again in + Virginia, conceived a plan which would make it not only necessary + for him to lecture again, but would supply him with a subject. + Steve's plan was very simple: it was to relieve the lecturer of + his funds by a friendly highway robbery, and let an account of + the adventure furnish the new lecture. + + In 'Roughing It' Mark Twain has given a version of this mock + robbery which is correct enough as far as it goes; but important + details are lacking. Only a few years ago (it was April, 1907), + in his cabin on jackass Hill, with Joseph Goodman and the writer + of this history present, Steve Gillis made his “death-bed” + confession as is here set down: + + “Mark's lecture was given in Piper's Opera House, October 30, + 1866. The Virginia City people had heard many famous lectures + before, but they were mere sideshows compared with Mark's. It + could have been run to crowded houses for a week. We begged him + to give the common people a chance; but he refused to repeat + himself. He was going down to Carson, and was coming back to talk + in Gold Hill about a week later, and his agent, Denis McCarthy, + and I laid a plan to have him robbed on the Divide between Gold + Hill and Virginia, after the Gold Hill lecture was over and he + and Denis would be coming home with the money. The Divide was a + good lonely place, and was famous for its hold-ups. We got City + Marshal George Birdsall into it with us, and took in Leslie + Blackburn, Pat Holland, Jimmy Eddington, and one or two more of + Sam's old friends. We all loved him, and would have fought for + him in a moment. That's the kind of friends Mark had in Nevada. + If he had any enemies I never heard of them. + + “We didn't take in Dan de Quille, or Joe here, because Sam was + Joe's guest, and we were afraid he would tell him. We didn't take + in Dan because we wanted him to write it up as a genuine robbery + and make a big sensation. That would pack the opera-house at two + dollars a seat to hear Mark tell the story. + + “Well, everything went off pretty well. About the time Mark was + finishing his lecture in Gold Hill the robbers all went up on the + Divide to wait, but Mark's audience gave him a kind of reception + after his lecture, and we nearly froze to death up there before + he came along. By and by I went back to see what was the matter. + Sam and Denis were coming, and carrying a carpet-sack about half + full of silver between them. I shadowed them and blew a + policeman's whistle as a signal to the boys when the lecturers + were within about a hundred yards of the place. I heard Sam say + to Denis: + + “'I'm glad they've got a policeman on the Divide. They never had + one in my day.' + + “Just about that time the boys, all with black masks on and + silver dollars at the sides of their tongues to disguise their + voices, stepped out and stuck six-shooters at Sam and Denis and + told them to put up their hands. The robbers called each other + 'Beauregard' and 'Stonewall Jackson.' Of course Denis's hands + went up, and Mark's, too, though Mark wasn't a bit scared or + excited. He talked to the robbers in his regular fashion. He + said: + + “'Don't flourish those pistols so promiscuously. They might go + off by accident.' + + “They told him to hand over his watch and money; but when he + started to take his hands down they made him put them up again. + Then he asked how they expected him to give them his valuables + with his hands up in the sky. He said his treasures didn't lie in + heaven. He told them not to take his watch, which was the one + Sandy Baldwin and Theodore Winters had given him as Governor of + the Third House, but we took it all the same. + + “Whenever he started to put his hands down we made him put them + up again. Once he said: + + “'Don't you fellows be so rough. I was tenderly reared.' + + “Then we told him and Denis to keep their hands up for fifteen + minutes after we were gone—this was to give us time to get back + to Virginia and be settled when they came along. As we were going + away Mark called: + + “'Say, you forgot something.' + + “'What is it?' + + “Why, the carpet-bag.' + + “He was cool all the time. Senator Bill Stewart, in his + Autobiography, tells a great story of how scared Mark was, and + how he ran; but Stewart was three thousand miles from Virginia by + that time, and later got mad at Mark because he made a joke about + him in 'Roughing It'. + + “Denis wanted to take his hands down pretty soon after we were + gone, but Mark said: + + “'No, Denis, I'm used to obeying orders when they are given in + that convincing way; we'll just keep our hands up another fifteen + minutes or so for good measure.' + + “We were waiting in a big saloon on C Street when Mark and Denis + came along. We knew they would come in, and we expected Mark + would be excited; but he was as unruffled as a mountain lake. He + told us they had been robbed, and asked me if I had any money. I + gave him a hundred dollars of his own money, and he ordered + refreshments for everybody. Then we adjourned to the Enterprise + office, where he offered a reward, and Dan de Quille wrote up the + story and telegraphed it to the other newspapers. Then somebody + suggested that Mark would have to give another lecture now, and + that the robbery would make a great subject. He entered right + into the thing, and next day we engaged Piper's Opera House, and + people were offering five dollars apiece for front seats. It + would have been the biggest thing that ever came to Virginia if + it had come off. But we made a mistake, then, by taking Sandy + Baldwin into the joke. We took in Joe here, too, and gave him the + watch and money to keep, which made it hard for Joe afterward. + But it was Sandy Baldwin that ruined us. He had Mark out to + dinner the night before the show was to come off, and after he + got well warmed up with champagne he thought it would be a smart + thing to let Mark into what was really going on. + + “Mark didn't see it our way. He was mad clear through.” + + At this point Joseph Goodman took up the story. He said: + + “Those devils put Sam's money, watch, keys, pencils, and all his + things into my hands. I felt particularly mean at being made + accessory to the crime, especially as Sam was my guest, and I had + grave doubts as to how he would take it when he found out the + robbery was not genuine. + + “I felt terribly guilty when he said: + + “'Joe, those d—n thieves took my keys, and I can't get into my + trunk. Do you suppose you could get me a key that would fit my + trunk?' + + “I said I thought I could during the day, and after Sam had gone + I took his own key, put it in the fire and burnt it to make it + look black. Then I took a file and scratched it here and there, + to make it look as if I had been fitting it to the lock, feeling + guilty all the time, like a man who is trying to hide a murder. + Sam did not ask for his key that day, and that evening he was + invited to judge Baldwin's to dinner. I thought he looked pretty + silent and solemn when he came home; but he only said: + + “'Joe, let's play cards; I don't feel sleepy.' + + “Steve here, and two or three of the other boys who had been + active in the robbery, were present, and they did not like Sam's + manner, so they excused themselves and left him alone with me. We + played a good while; then he said: + + “'Joe, these cards are greasy. I have got some new ones in my + trunk. Did you get that key to-day?' + + “I fished out that burnt, scratched-up key with fear and + trembling. But he didn't seem to notice it at all, and presently + returned with the cards. Then we played, and played, and + played—till one o'clock—two o'clock—Sam hardly saying a word, and + I wondering what was going to happen. By and by he laid down his + cards and looked at me, and said: + + “'Joe, Sandy Baldwin told me all about that robbery to-night. + Now, Joe, I have found out that the law doesn't recognize a joke, + and I am going to send every one of those fellows to the + penitentiary.' + + “He said it with such solemn gravity, and such vindictiveness, + that I believed he was in dead earnest. + + “I know that I put in two hours of the hardest work I ever did, + trying to talk him out of that resolution. I used all the + arguments about the boys being his oldest friends; how they all + loved him, and how the joke had been entirely for his own good; I + pleaded with him, begged him to reconsider; I went and got his + money and his watch and laid them on the table; but for a time it + seemed hopeless. And I could imagine those fellows going behind + the bars, and the sensation it would make in California; and just + as I was about to give it up he said: + + “'Well, Joe, I'll let it pass—this time; I'll forgive them again; + I've had to do it so many times; but if I should see Denis + McCarthy and Steve Gillis mounting the scaffold to-morrow, and I + could save them by turning over my hand, I wouldn't do it!' + + “He canceled the lecture engagement, however, next morning, and + the day after left on the Pioneer Stage, by the way of Donner + Lake, for California. The boys came rather sheepishly to see him + off; but he would make no show of relenting. When they introduced + themselves as Beauregard, Stonewall Jackson, etc., he merely + said: + + “'Yes, and you'll all be behind the bars some day. There's been a + good deal of robbery around here lately, and it's pretty clear + now who did it.' They handed him a package containing the masks + which the robbers had worn. He received it in gloomy silence; but + as the stage drove away he put his head out of the window, and + after some pretty vigorous admonition resumed his old smile, and + called out: 'Good-by, friends; good-by, thieves; I bear you no + malice.' So the heaviest joke was on his tormentors after all.” + + This is the story of the famous Mark Twain robbery direct from + headquarters. It has been garbled in so many ways that it seems + worth setting down in full. Denis McCarthy, who joined him + presently in San Francisco, received a little more punishment + there. + + “What kind of a trip did you boys have?” a friend asked of them. + + Clemens, just recovering from a cold which the exposure on the + Divide had given him, smiled grimly: + + “Oh, pretty good, only Denis here mistook it for a spree.” + + He lectured again in San Francisco, this time telling the story + of his Overland trip in 1861, and he did the daring thing of + repeating three times the worn-out story of Horace Greeley's ride + with Hank Monk, as given later in 'Roughing It'. People were + deadly tired of that story out there, and when he told it the + first time, with great seriousness, they thought he must be + failing mentally. They did not laugh—they only felt sorry. He + waited a little, as if expecting a laugh, and presently led + around to it and told it again. The audience was astonished still + more, and pitied him thoroughly. He seemed to be waiting + pathetically in the dead silence for their applause, then went on + with his lecture; but presently, with labored effort, struggled + around to the old story again, and told it for the third time. + The audience suddenly saw the joke then, and became vociferous + and hysterical in their applause; but it was a narrow escape. He + would have been hysterical himself if the relief had not came + when it did. —[A side-light on the Horace Greeley story and on + Mr. Greeley's eccentricities is furnished by Mr. Goodman: + + When I was going East in 1869 I happened to see Hank Monk just + before I started. “Mr. Goodman,” he said, “you tell Horace + Greeley that I want to come East, and ask him to send me a pass.” + “All right, Hank,” I said, “I will.” It happened that when I got + to New York City one of the first men I met was Greeley. “Mr. + Greeley,” said, “I have a message for you from Hank Monk.” + Greeley bristled and glared at me. “That—rascal?” he said, “He + has done me more injury than any other man in America.”] + + + + + LVI. BACK TO THE STATES + + + In the mean time Clemens had completed his plan for sailing, and + had arranged with General McComb, of the Alta California, for + letters during his proposed trip around the world. However, he + meant to visit his people first, and his old home. He could go + back with means now, and with the prestige of success. + + “I sail to-morrow per Opposition—telegraphed you to-day,” he + wrote on December 14th, and a day later his note-book entry says: + + Sailed from San Francisco in Opposition (line) steamer America, + Capt. Wakeman, at noon, 15th Dec., 1866. Pleasant sunny day, hills + brightly clad with green grass and shrubbery. + + So he was really going home at last! He had been gone five and a + half years—eventful, adventurous years that had made him over + completely, at least so far as ambitions and equipment were + concerned. He had came away, in his early manhood, a printer and + a pilot, unknown outside of his class. He was returning a man of + thirty-one, with a fund of hard experience, three added + professions—mining, journalism, and lecturing—also with a new + name, already famous on the sunset slopes of its adoption, and + beginning to be heard over the hills and far away. In some + degree, at least, he resembled the prince of a fairy tale who, + starting out humble and unnoticed, wins his way through a hundred + adventures and returns with gifts and honors. + + The homeward voyage was a notable one. It began with a tempest a + little way out of San Francisco—a storm terrible but brief, that + brought the passengers from their berths to the deck, and for a + time set them praying. Then there was Captain Ned Wakeman, a big, + burly, fearless sailor, who had visited the edges of all + continents and archipelagos; who had been born at sea, and never + had a day's schooling in his life, but knew the Bible by heart; + who was full of human nature and profanity, and believed he was + the only man on the globe who knew the secret of the Bible + miracles. He became a distinct personality in Mark Twain's + work—the memory of him was an unfailing delight. Captain “Ned + Blakely,” in 'Roughing It', who with his own hands hanged Bill + Noakes, after reading him promiscuous chapters from the Bible, + was Captain Wakeman. Captain “Stormfield,” who had the marvelous + visit to heaven, was likewise Captain Wakeman; and he appears in + the “Idle Excursion” and elsewhere. + + Another event of the voyage was crossing the Nicaragua + Isthmus—the trip across the lake and down the San Juan River—a + brand-new experience, between shores of splendid tropic tangle, + gleaming with vivid life. The luxuriance got into his note-book. + + Dark grottos, fairy festoons, tunnels, temples, columns, pillars, + towers, pilasters, terraces, pyramids, mounds, domes, walls, in + endless confusion of vine-work—no shape known to architecture + unimitated—and all so webbed together that short distances within + are only gained by glimpses. Monkeys here and there; birds + warbling; gorgeous plumaged birds on the wing; Paradise itself, + the imperial realm of beauty-nothing to wish for to make it + perfect. + + But it was beyond the isthmus that the voyage loomed into + proportions somber and terrible. The vessel they took there, the + San Francisco, sailed from Greytown January 1, 1867, the + beginning of a memorable year in Mark Twain's life. Next day two + cases of Asiatic cholera were reported in the steerage. There had + been a rumor of it in Nicaragua, but no one expected it on the + ship. + + The nature of the disease was not hinted at until evening, when + one of the men died. Soon after midnight, the other followed. A + minister making the voyage home, Rev. J. G. Fackler, read the + burial service. The gaiety of the passengers, who had become well + acquainted during the Pacific voyage, was subdued. When the word + “cholera” went among them, faces grew grave and frightened. On + the morning of January 4th Reverend Fackler's services were again + required. The dead man was put overboard within half an hour + after he had ceased to breathe. + + Gloom settled upon the ship. All steam was made to put into Key + West. Then some of the machinery gave way and the ship lay + rolling, helplessly becalmed in the fierce heat of the Gulf, + while repairs were being made. The work was done at a + disadvantage, and the parts did not hold. Time and again they + were obliged to lie to, in the deadly tropic heat, listening to + the hopeless hammering, wondering who would be the next to be + sewed up hastily in a blanket and slipped over the ship's side. + On the 5th seven new cases of illness were reported. One of the + crew, a man called “Shape,” was said to be dying. A few hours + later he was dead. By this time the Reverend Fackler himself had + been taken. + + “So they are burying poor 'Shape' without benefit of clergy,” + says the note-book. + + General consternation now began to prevail. Then it was learned + that the ship's doctor had run out of medicines. The passengers + became demoralized. They believed their vessel was to become a + charnel ship. Strict sanitary orders were issued, and a hospital + was improvised. + + Verily the ship is becoming a floating hospital herself—not an hour + passes but brings its fresh sensation, its new disaster, its + melancholy tidings. When I think of poor “Shape” and the preacher, + both so well when I saw them yesterday evening, I realize that I + myself may be dead to-morrow. + Since the last two hours all laughter, all levity, has ceased on + the ship—a settled gloom is upon the faces of the passengers. + + By noon it was evident that the minister could not survive. He + died at two o'clock next morning; the fifth victim in less than + five days. The machinery continued to break and the vessel to + drag. The ship's doctor confessed to Clemens that he was + helpless. There were eight patients in the hospital. + + But on January 6th they managed to make Key West, and for some + reason were not quarantined. Twenty-one passengers immediately + deserted the ship and were heard of no more. + + “I am glad they are gone. D—n them,” says the notebook. + Apparently he had never considered leaving, and a number of + others remained. The doctor restocked his medicine-locker, and + the next day they put to sea again. Certainly they were a daring + lot of voyagers. On the 8th another of the patients died. Then + the cooler weather seemed to check the contagion, and it was not + until the night of the 11th, when the New York harbor lights were + in view, that the final death occurred. There were no new cases + by this time, and the other patients were convalescent. A + certificate was made out that the last man had died of “dropsy.” + There would seem to have been no serious difficulty in docking + the vessel and landing the passengers. The matter would probably + be handled differently to-day. + + + + + LVII. OLD FRIENDS AND NEW PLANS + + + It had been more than thirteen years since his first arrival in + New York. Then he had been a youth, green, untraveled, eager to + get away from home. Now a veteran, he was as eager to return. + + He stopped only long enough in New York to see Charles Henry + Webb, late of California, who had put together a number of the + Mark Twain sketches, including “The Jumping Frog,” for book + publication. Clemens himself decided to take the book to + Carleton, thinking that, having missed the fame of the “Frog” + once, he might welcome a chance to stand sponsor for it now. But + Carleton was wary; the “Frog” had won favor, and even fame, in + its fugitive, vagrant way, but a book was another matter. Books + were undertaken very seriously and with plenty of consideration + in those days. Twenty-one years later, in Switzerland, Carleton + said to Mark Twain: + + “My chief claim to immortality is the distinction of having + declined your first book.” + + Clemens was ready enough to give up the book when Carleton + declined it, but Webb said he would publish it himself, and he + set about it forthwith. The author waited no longer now, but + started for St. Louis, and was soon with his mother and sister, + whom he had not seen since that eventful first year of the war. + They thought he looked old, which was true enough, but they found + him unchanged in his manner: buoyant, full of banter and gravely + quaint remarks—he was always the same. Jane Clemens had grown + older, too. She was nearly sixty-four, but as keen and vigorous + as ever-proud (even if somewhat critical) of this handsome, + brilliant man of new name and fame who had been her mischievous, + wayward boy. She petted him, joked with him, scolded him, and + inquired searchingly into his morals and habits. In turn he + petted, comforted, and teased her. She decided that he was the + same Sam, and always would be—a true prophecy. + + He went up to Hannibal to see old friends. Many were married; + some had moved away; some were dead—the old story. He delivered + his lecture there, and was the center of interest and + admiration—his welcome might have satisfied even Tom Sawyer. From + Hannibal he journeyed to Keokuk, where he lectured again to a + crowd of old friends and new, then returned to St. Louis for a + more extended visit. + + It was while he was in St. Louis that he first saw the + announcement of the Quaker City Holy Land Excursion, and was + promptly fascinated by what was then a brand-new idea in ocean + travel—a splendid picnic—a choice and refined party that would + sail away for a long summer's journeying to the most romantic of + all lands and seas, the shores of the Mediterranean. No such + argosy had ever set out before in pursuit of the golden fleece of + happiness. + + His projected trip around the world lost its charm in the light + of this idyllic dream. Henry Ward Beecher was advertised as one + of the party; General Sherman as another; also ministers, + high-class journalists—the best minds of the nation. Anson + Burlingame had told him to associate with persons of refinement + and intellect. He lost no time in writing to the Alta, proposing + that they send him in this select company. + + Noah Brooks, who was then on the Alta, states—[In an article + published in the Century Magazine.]—that the management was + staggered by the proposition, but that Col. John McComb insisted + that the investment in Mark Twain would be sound. A letter was + accordingly sent, stating that a check for his passage would be + forwarded in due season, and that meantime he could contribute + letters from New York City. The rate for all letters was to be + twenty dollars each. The arrangement was a godsend, in the + fullest sense of the word, to Mark Twain. + + It was now April, and he was eager to get back to New York to + arrange his passage. The Quaker City would not sail for two + months yet (two eventful months), but the advertisement said that + passages must be secured by the 5th, and he was there on that + day. Almost the first man he met was the chief of the New York + Alta bureau with a check for twelve hundred and fifty dollars + (the amount of his ticket) and a telegram saying, “Ship Mark + Twain in the Holy Land Excursion and pay his passage.” + + —[The following letter, which bears no date, was probably handed to + him later in the New York Alta office as a sort of credential: + ALTA CALIFORNIA OFFICE, 42 JOHN STREET, NEW YORK. + Sam'l Clemens, Esq., New York. + DEAR SIR,—I have the honor to inform you that Fred'k. MacCrellish & + Co., Proprietors of Alta California, San Francisco, Cal., desire to + engage your services as Special Correspondent on the pleasure + excursion now about to proceed from this City to the Holy Land. In + obedience to their instructions I have secured a passage for you on + the vessel about to convey the excursion party referred to, and + made such arrangements as I hope will secure your comfort and + convenience. Your only instructions are that you will continue to + write at such times and from such places as you deem proper, and in + the same style that heretofore secured you the favor of the readers + of the Alta California. I have the honor to remain, with high + respect and esteem, + Your ob'dt. Servant, + JOHN J. MURPHY.] + + The Alta, it appears, had already applied for his berth; but, not + having been vouched for by Mr. Beecher or some other eminent + divine, Clemens was fearful he might not be accepted. Quite + casually he was enlightened on this point. While waiting for + attention in the shipping-office, with the Alta agent, he heard a + newspaper man inquire what notables were going. A clerk, with + evident pride, rattled off the names: + + “Lieutenant-General Sherman, Henry Ward Beecher, and Mask Twain; + also probably General Banks.” + + So he was billed as an attraction. It was his first surreptitious + taste of fame on the Atlantic coast, and not without its delight. + The story often told of his being introduced by Ned House, of the + Tribune, as a minister, though often repeated by Mark Twain + himself, was in the nature of a joke, and mainly apocryphal. + Clemens was a good deal in House's company at the time, for he + had made an arrangement to contribute occasional letters to the + Tribune, and House no doubt introduced him jokingly as one of the + Quaker City ministers. + + + + + LVIII. A NEW BOOK AND A LECTURE + + + Webb, meantime, had pushed the Frog book along. The proofs had + been read and the volume was about ready for issue. Clemens wrote + to his mother April 15th: + + My book will probably be in the bookseller's hands in about two + weeks. After that I shall lecture. Since I have been gone, the boys + have gotten up a “call” on me signed by two hundred Californians. + + The lecture plan was the idea of Frank Fuller, who as acting + Governor of Utah had known Mark Twain on the Comstock, and + prophesied favorably of his future career. Clemens had hunted up + Fuller on landing in New York in January, and Fuller had + encouraged the lecture then; but Clemens was doubtful. + + “I have no reputation with the general public here,” he said. “We + couldn't get a baker's dozen to hear me.” + + But Fuller was a sanguine person, with an energy and enthusiasm + that were infectious. He insisted that the idea was sound. It + would solidify Mark Twain's reputation on the Atlantic coast, he + declared, insisting that the largest house in New York, Cooper + Union, should be taken. Clemens had partially consented, and + Fuller had arranged with all the Pacific slope people who had + come East, headed by ex-Governor James W. Nye (by this time + Senator at Washington), to sign a call for the “Inimitable Mark + Twain” to appear before a New York audience. Fuller made Nye + agree to be there and introduce the lecturer, and he was + burningly busy and happy in the prospect. + + But Mark Twain was not happy. He looked at that spacious hall and + imagined the little crowd of faithful Californian stragglers that + might gather in to hear him, and the ridicule of the papers next + day. He begged Fuller to take a smaller hall, the smallest he + could get. But only the biggest hall in New York would satisfy + Fuller. He would have taken a larger one if he could have found + it. The lecture was announced for May 6th. Its subject was + “Kanakadom, or the Sandwich Islands”—tickets fifty cents. Fuller + timed it to follow a few days after Webb's book should appear, so + that one event might help the other. + + Mark Twain's first book, 'The Celebrated Jumping Frog of + Calaveyas County, and Other Sketches', was scheduled for May 1st, + and did, in fact, appear on that date; but to the author it was + no longer an important event. Jim Smiley's frog as + standard-bearer of his literary procession was not an interesting + object, so far as he was concerned—not with that vast, empty hall + in the background and the insane undertaking of trying to fill + it. The San Francisco venture had been as nothing compared with + this. Fuller was working night and day with abounding joy, while + the subject of his labor felt as if he were on the brink of a + fearful precipice, preparing to try a pair of wings without first + learning to fly. At one instant he was cold with fright, the next + glowing with an infection of Fuller's faith. He devised a hundred + schemes for the sale of seats. Once he came rushing to Fuller, + saying: + + “Send a lot of tickets down to the Chickering Piano Company. I + have promised to put on my programme, 'The piano used at this + entertainment is manufactured by Chickering.”' + + “But you don't want a piano, Mark,” said Fuller, “do you?” + + “No, of course not; but they will distribute the tickets for the + sake of the advertisement, whether we have the piano or not.” + + Fuller got out a lot of handbills and hung bunches of them in the + stages, omnibuses, and horse-cars. Clemens at first haunted these + vehicles to see if anybody noticed the bills. The little dangling + bunches seemed untouched. Finally two men came in; one of them + pulled off a bill and glanced at it. His friend asked: + + “Who's Mark Twain?” + + “God knows; I don't!” + + The lecturer could not ride any more. He was desperate. + + “Fuller,” he groaned, “there isn't a sign—a ripple of interest.” + + Fuller assured him that everything was working all right “working + underneath,” Fuller said—but the lecturer was hopeless. He + reported his impressions to the folks at home: + + Everything looks shady, at least, if not dark; I have a good agent; + but now, after we have hired the Cooper Institute, and gone to an + expense in one way or another of $500, it comes out that I have got + to play against Speaker Colfax at Irving Hall, Ristori, and also + the double troop of Japanese jugglers, the latter opening at the + great Academy of Music—and with all this against me I have taken + the largest house in New York and cannot back water. + + He might have added that there were other rival entertainments: + “The Flying Scud” was at Wallack's, the “Black Crook” was at + Niblo's, John Brougham at the Olympic; and there were at least a + dozen lesser attractions. New York was not the inexhaustible city + in those days; these things could gather in the public to the + last man. When the day drew near, and only a few tickets had been + sold, Clemens was desperate. + + “Fuller,” he said, “there'll be nobody in the Cooper Union that + night but you and me. I am on the verge of suicide. I would + commit suicide if I had the pluck and the outfit. You must paper + the house, Fuller. You must send out a flood of complementaries.” + + “Very well,” said Fuller; “what we want this time is reputation + anyway—money is secondary. I'll put you before the choicest, most + intelligent audience that ever was gathered in New York City. I + will bring in the school-instructors—the finest body of men and + women in the world.” + + Fuller immediately sent out a deluge of complimentary tickets, + inviting the school-teachers of New York and Brooklyn, and all + the adjacent country, to come free and hear Mark Twain's great + lecture on Kanakadom. This was within forty-eight hours of the + time he was to appear. + + Senator Nye was to have joined Clemens and Fuller at the + Westminster, where Clemens was stopping, and they waited for him + there with a carriage, fuming and swearing, until it was evident + that he was not coming. At last Clemens said: + + “Fuller, you've got to introduce me.” + + “No,” suggested Fuller; “I've got a better scheme than that. You + get up and begin by bemeaning Nye for not being there. That will + be better anyway.” + + Clemens said: + + “Well, Fuller, I can do that. I feel that way. I'll try to think + up something fresh and happy to say about that horse-thief.” + + They drove to Cooper Union with trepidation. Suppose, after all, + the school-teachers had declined to come? They went half an hour + before the lecture was to begin. Forty years later Mark Twain + said: + + “I couldn't keep away. I wanted to see that vast Mammoth cave and + die. But when we got near the building I saw that all the streets + were blocked with people, and that traffic had stopped. I + couldn't believe that these people were trying to get into Cooper + Institute; but they were, and when I got to the stage at last the + house was jammed full-packed; there wasn't room enough left for a + child. + + “I was happy and I was excited beyond expression. I poured the + Sandwich Islands out on those people, and they laughed and + shouted to my entire content. For an hour and fifteen minutes I + was in paradise.” + + And Fuller to-day, alive and young, when so many others of that + ancient time and event have vanished, has added: + + “When Mark appeared the Californians gave a regular yell of + welcome. When that was over he walked to the edge of the + platform, looked carefully down in the pit, round the edges as if + he were hunting for something. Then he said: 'There was to have + been a piano here, and a senator to introduce me. I don't seem to + discover them anywhere. The piano was a good one, but we will + have to get along with such music as I can make with your help. + As for the senator—Then Mark let himself go and did as he + promised about Senator Nye. He said things that made men from the + Pacific coast, who had known Nye, scream with delight. After that + came his lecture. The first sentence captured the audience. From + that moment to the end it was either in a roar of laughter or + half breathless by his beautiful descriptive passages. People + were positively ill for days, laughing at that lecture.” + + So it was a success: everybody was glad to have been there; the + papers were kind, congratulations numerous. —[Kind but not + extravagant; those were burning political times, and the doings + of mere literary people did not excite the press to the extent of + headlines. A jam around Cooper Union to-day, followed by such an + artistic triumph, would be a news event. On the other hand, + Schuyler Colfax, then Speaker of the House, was reported to the + extent of a column, nonpareil. His lecture was of no literary + importance, and no echo of it now remains. But those were + political, not artistic, days. + + Of Mark Twain's lecture the Times notice said: + + “Nearly every one present came prepared for considerable + provocation for enjoyable laughter, and from the appearance of + their mirthful faces leaving the hall at the conclusion of the + lecture but few were disappointed, and it is not too much to say + that seldom has so large an audience been so uniformly pleased as + the one that listened to Mark Twain's quaint remarks last + evening. The large hall of the Union was filled to its utmost + capacity by fully two thousand persons, which fact spoke well for + the reputation of the lecturer and his future success. Mark + Twain's style is a quaint one both in manner and method, and + through his discourse he managed to keep on the right side of the + audience, and frequently convulsed it with hearty laughter.... + During a description of the topography of the Sandwich Islands + the lecturer surprised his hearers by a graphic and eloquent + description of the eruption of the great volcano, which occurred + in 1840, and his language was loudly applauded. + + “Judging from the success achieved by the lecturer last evening, + he should repeat his experiment at an early date.”] + + COOPER INSTITUTE By Invitation of s large number of + prominent Californians and Citizens of New York, + MARK TWAIN + WILL DELIVER A SERIO-HUMEROUS LECTURE CONERNING + KANAKDOM OR THE SANDWICH ISLANDS, + COOPER INSTITUTE, On Monday Evening, May 6,1867. + TICKETS FIFTY GENTS. For Sale at Chickering and Sons, + 852 Broadway, and at the Principal Hotel + Doors open at 7 o'clock. The Wisdom will begin to flow at 8. + + Mark Twain always felt grateful to the school-teachers for that + night. Many years later, when they wanted him to read to them in + Steinway Hall, he gladly gave his services without charge. + + Nor was the lecture a complete financial failure. In spite of the + flood of complementaries, there was a cash return of some three + hundred dollars from the sale of tickets—a substantial aid in + defraying the expenses which Fuller assumed and insisted on + making good on his own account. That was Fuller's regal way; his + return lay in the joy of the game, and in the winning of the + larger stake for a friend. + + “Mark,” he said, “it is all right. The fortune didn't come, but + it will. The fame has arrived; with this lecture and your book + just out you are going to be the most talked-of man in the + country. Your letters for the Alta and the Tribune will get the + widest reception of any letters of travel ever written.” + + + + + LIX. THE FIRST BOOK + + + With the shadow of the Cooper Institute so happily dispelled, The + Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County, and his following of + Other Sketches, became a matter of more interest. The book was a + neat blue-and-gold volume printed by John A. Gray & Green, the + old firm for which the boy, Sam Clemens, had set type thirteen + years before. The title-page bore Webb's name as publisher, with + the American News Company as selling agents. It further stated + that the book was edited by “John Paul,” that is to say by Webb + himself. The dedication was in keeping with the general + irresponsible character of the venture. It was as follows: + + TO JOHN SMITH WHOM I HAVE KNOWN IN DIVERS AND + SUNDRY PLACES ABOUT THE WORLD, AND WHOSE MANY + AND MANIFOLD VIRTUES DID ALWAYS COMMAND MY + ESTEEM, I DEDICATE THIS BOOK + + It is said that the man to whom a volume is dedicated always buys + a copy. If this prove true in the present instance, a princely + affluence is about to burst upon THE AUTHOR. + + The “advertisement” stated that the author had “scaled the + heights of popularity at a single jump, and won for himself the + sobriquet of the 'Wild Humorist of the Pacific Slope'; + furthermore, that he was known to fame as the 'Moralist of the + Main,'” and that as such he would be likely to go down to + posterity, adding that it was in his secondary character, as + humorist, rather than in his primal one of moralist, that the + volume aimed to present him.—[The advertisement complete, with + extracts from the book, may be found under Appendix E, at the end + of last volume.] + + Every little while, during the forty years or more that have + elapsed since then, some one has come forward announcing Mark + Twain to be as much a philosopher as a humorist, as if this were + a new discovery. But it was a discovery chiefly to the person + making the announcement. Every one who ever knew Mark Twain at + any period of his life made the same discovery. Every one who + ever took the trouble to familiarize himself with his work made + it. Those who did not make it have known his work only by hearsay + and quotation, or they have read it very casually, or have been + very dull. It would be much more of a discovery to find a book in + which he has not been serious—a philosopher, a moralist, and a + poet. Even in the Jumping Frog sketches, selected particularly + for their inconsequence, the under-vein of reflection and purpose + is not lacking. The answer to Moral Statistician—[In “Answers to + Correspondents,” included now in Sketches New and Old. An extract + from it, and from “A Strange Dream,” will be found in Appendix + E.]—is fairly alive with human wisdom and righteous wrath. The + “Strange Dream,” though ending in a joke, is aglow with poetry. + Webb's “advertisement” was playfully written, but it was + earnestly intended, and he writes Mark Twain down a moralist—not + as a discovery, but as a matter of course. The discoveries came + along later, when the author's fame as a humorist had dazzled the + nations. + + It is as well to say it here as anywhere, perhaps, that one + reason why Mark Twain found it difficult to be accepted seriously + was the fact that his personality was in itself so essentially + humorous. His physiognomy, his manner of speech, this movement, + his mental attitude toward events—all these were distinctly + diverting. When we add to this that his medium of expression was + nearly always full of the quaint phrasing and those surprising + appositions which we recognize as amusing, it is not so + astonishing that his deeper, wiser, more serious purpose should + be overlooked. On the whole these unabated discoverers serve a + purpose, if only to make the rest of their species look somewhat + deeper than the comic phrase. + + The little blue-and-gold volume which presented the Frog story + and twenty-six other sketches in covers is chiefly important + to-day as being Mark Twain's first book. The selections in it + were made for a public that had been too busy with a great war to + learn discrimination, and most of them have properly found + oblivion. Fewer than a dozen of them were included in his + collected Sketches issued eight years later, and some even of + those might have been spared; also some that were added, for that + matter; but detailed literary criticism is not the province of + this work. The reader may investigate and judge for himself. + + Clemens was pleased with the appearance of his book. To Bret + Harte he wrote: + + The book is out and it is handsome. It is full of damnable errors + of grammar and deadly inconsistencies of spelling in the Frog + sketch, because I was away and did not read proofs; but be a + friend and say nothing about these things. When my hurry is over, + I will send you a copy to pisen the children with. + + That he had no exaggerated opinion of the book's contents or + prospects we may gather from his letter home: + + As for the Frog book, I don't believe it will ever pay anything + worth a cent. I published it simply to advertise myself, and not + with the hope of making anything out of it. + + He had grown more lenient in his opinion of the merits of the + Frog story itself since it had made friends in high places, + especially since James Russell Lowell had pronounced it “the + finest piece of humorous writing yet produced in America”; but + compared with his lecture triumph, and his prospective journey to + foreign seas, his book venture, at best, claimed no more than a + casual regard. A Sandwich Island book (he had collected his Union + letters with the idea of a volume) he gave up altogether after + one unsuccessful offer of it to Dick & Fitzgerald. + + Frank Fuller's statement, that the fame had arrived, had in it + some measure of truth. Lecture propositions came from various + directions. Thomas Nast, then in the early day of his great + popularity, proposed a joint tour, in which Clemens would + lecture, while he, Nast, illustrated the remarks with lightning + caricatures. But the time was too short; the Quaker City would + sail on the 8th of June, and in the mean time the Alta + correspondent was far behind with his New York letters. On May + 29th he wrote: + + I am 18 Alta letters behind, and I must catch up or bust. I have + refused all invitations to lecture. Don't know how my book is + coming on. + + He worked like a slave for a week or so, almost night and day, to + clean up matters before his departure. Then came days of idleness + and reaction-days of waiting, during which his natural + restlessness and the old-time regret for things done and undone, + beset him. + + My passage is paid, and if the ship sails I sail on her; but I make + no calculations, have bought no cigars, no sea-going clothing—have + made no preparations whatever—shall not pack my trunk till the + morning we sail. + All I do know or feel is that I am wild with impatience to move + —move—move! Curse the endless delays! They always kill me—they make + me neglect every duty, and then I have a conscience that tears me + like a wild beast. I wish I never had to stop anywhere a month. I + do more mean things the moment I get a chance to fold my hands and + sit down than ever I get forgiveness for. + Yes, we are to meet at Mr. Beach's next Thursday night, and I + suppose we shall have to be gotten up regardless of expense, in + swallow-tails, white kids and everything 'en regle'. + I am resigned to Rev. Mr. Hutchinson's or anybody else's + supervision. I don't mind it. I am fixed. I have got a splendid, + immoral, tobacco-smoking, wine-drinking, godless roommate who is as + good and true and right-minded a man as ever lived—a man whose + blameless conduct and example will always be an eloquent sermon to + all who shall come within their influence. But send on the + professional preachers—there are none I like better to converse + with; if they're not narrowminded and bigoted they make good + companions. + + The “splendid immoral room-mate” was Dan Slote—“Dan,” of The + Innocents, a lovable character—all as set down. Samuel Clemens + wrote one more letter to his mother and sister—a + conscience-stricken, pessimistic letter of good-by written the + night before sailing. Referring to the Alta letters he says: + + I think they are the stupidest letters ever written from New York. + Corresponding has been a perfect drag ever since I got to the + States. If it continues abroad, I don't know what the Tribune and + Alta folk will think. + + He remembers Orion, who had been officially eliminated when + Nevada had received statehood. + + I often wonder if his law business is going satisfactorily. I wish + I had gone to Washington in the winter instead of going West. I + could have gouged an office out of Bill Stewart for him, and that + would have atoned for the loss of my home visit. But I am so + worthless that it seems to me I never do anything or accomplish + anything that lingers in my mind as a pleasant memory. My mind is + stored full of unworthy conduct toward Orion and toward you all, + and an accusing conscience gives me peace only in excitement and + restless moving from place to place. If I could only say I had done + one thing for any of you that entitled me to your good opinions (I + say nothing of your love, for I am sure of that, no matter how + unworthy of it I may make myself—from Orion down, you have always + given me that; all the days of my life, when God Almighty knows I + have seldom deserved it), I believe I could go home and stay there + —and I know I would care little for the world's praise or blame. + There is no satisfaction in the world's praise anyhow, and it has + no worth to me save in the way of business. I tried to gather up + its compliments to send you, but the work was distasteful and I + dropped it. + You observe that under a cheerful exterior I have got a spirit that + is angry with me and gives me freely its contempt. I can get away + from that at sea, and be tranquil and satisfied; and so, with my + parting love and benediction for Orion and all of you, I say + good-by and God bless you all-and welcome the wind that wafts a + weary soul to the sunny lands of the Mediterranean! + Yrs. forever, SAM + + + + + LX. THE INNOCENTS AT SEA + + + HOLY LAND PLEASURE EXCURSION + Steamer: Quaker City. + Captain C. C. Duncan. + Left New York at 2 P.m., June 8, 1867. + Rough weather—anchored within the harbor to lay all night. + + That first note recorded an event momentous in Mark Twain's + career—an event of supreme importance; if we concede that any + link in a chain regardless of size is of more importance than any + other link. Undoubtedly it remains the most conspicuous event, as + the world views it now, in retrospect. + + The note further heads a new chapter of history in sea-voyaging. + No such thing as the sailing of an ocean steamship with a + pleasure-party on a long transatlantic cruise had ever occurred + before. A similar project had been undertaken the previous year, + but owing to a cholera scare in the East it had been abandoned. + Now the dream had become a fact—a stupendous fact when we + consider it. Such an important beginning as that now would in all + likelihood furnish the chief news story of the day. + + But they had different ideas of news in those days. There were no + headlines announcing the departure of the Quaker City—only the + barest mention of the ship's sailing, though a prominent position + was given to an account of a senatorial excursion-party which set + out that same morning over the Union Pacific Railway, then under + construction. Every name in that political party was set dawn, + and not one of them except General Hancock will ever be heard of + again. The New York Times, however, had some one on its editorial + staff who thought it worth while to comment a little on the + history-making Quaker City excursion. The writer was pleasantly + complimentary to officers and passengers. He referred to Moses S. + Beach, of the Sun, who was taking with him type and press, + whereby he would “skilfully utilize the brains of the company for + their mutual edification.” Mr. Beecher and General Sherman would + find talent enough aboard to make the hours go pleasantly + (evidently the writer had not interested himself sufficiently to + know that these gentlemen were not along), and the paragraph + closed by prophesying other such excursions, and wishing the + travelers “good speed, a happy voyage, and a safe return.” + + That was handsome, especially for those days; only now, some fine + day, when an airship shall start with a band of happy argonauts + to land beyond the sunrise for the first time in history, we + shall feature it and emblazon it with pictures in the Sunday + papers, and weeklies, and in the magazines.—[The Quaker City idea + was so unheard-of that in some of the foreign ports visited, the + officials could not believe that the vessel was simply a + pleasure-craft, and were suspicious of some dark, ulterior + purpose.] + + That Henry Ward Beecher and General Sherman had concluded not to + go was a heavy disappointment at first; but it proved only a + temporary disaster. The inevitable amalgamation of all ship + companies took place. The sixty-seven travelers fell into + congenial groups, or they mingled and devised amusements, and + gossiped and became a big family, as happy and as free from + contention as families of that size are likely to be. + + The Quaker City was a good enough ship and sizable for her time. + She was registered eighteen hundred tons—about one-tenth the size + of Mediterranean excursion-steamers today—and when conditions + were favorable she could make ten knots an hour under steam—or, + at least, she could do it with the help of her auxiliary sails. + Altogether she was a cozy, satisfactory ship, and they were a + fortunate company who had her all to themselves and went out on + her on that long-ago ocean gipsying. She has grown since then, + even to the proportions of the Mayflower. It was necessary for + her to grow to hold all of those who in later times claimed to + have sailed in her on that voyage with Mark Twain.—[The Quaker + City passenger list will be found under Appendix F, at the end of + last volume.] + + They were not all ministers and deacons aboard the Quaker City. + Clemens found other congenial spirits be sides his room-mate Dan + Slote—among them the ship's surgeon, Dr. A. Reeve Jackson (the + guide-destroying “Doctor” of The Innocents); Jack Van Nostrand, + of New Jersey (“Jack”); Julius Moulton, of St. Louis (“Moult”), + and other care-free fellows, the smoking-room crowd which is + likely to make comradeship its chief watchword. There were + companionable people in the cabin crowd also—fine, intelligent + men and women, especially one of the latter, a middle-aged, + intellectual, motherly soul—Mrs. A. W. Fairbanks, of Cleveland, + Ohio. Mrs. Fairbanks—herself a newspaper correspondent for her + husband's paper, the Cleveland Herald had a large influence on + the character and general tone of those Quaker City letters which + established Mark Twain's larger fame. She was an able writer + herself; her judgment was thoughtful, refined, + unbiased—altogether of a superior sort. She understood Samuel + Clemens, counseled him, encouraged him to read his letters aloud + to her, became in reality “Mother Fairbanks,” as they termed her, + to him and to others of that ship who needed her kindly offices. + + In one of his home letters, later, he said of her: + + She was the most refined, intelligent, cultivated lady in the ship, + and altogether the kindest and best. She sewed my buttons on, kept + my clothing in presentable trim, fed me on Egyptian jam (when I + behaved), lectured me awfully on the quarter-deck on moonlit + promenading evenings, and cured me of several bad habits. I am + under lasting obligations to her. She looks young because she is so + good, but she has a grown son and daughter at home. + + In one of the early letters which Mrs. Fairbanks wrote to her + paper she is scarcely less complimentary to him, even if in a + different way. + + We have D.D.'s and M.D.'s—we have men of wisdom and men of wit. + There is one table from which is sure to come a peal of laughter, + and all eyes are turned toward Mark Twain, whose face is, perfectly + mirth-provoking. Sitting lazily at the table, scarcely genteel in + his appearance, there is something, I know not what, that interests + and attracts. I saw to-day at dinner venerable divines and sage- + looking men convulsed with laughter at his drolleries and quaint, + odd manners. + + It requires only a few days on shipboard for acquaintances to + form, and presently a little afternoon group was gathering to + hear Mark Twain read his letters. Mrs. Fairbanks was there, of + course, also Mr. and Mrs. S. L. Severance, likewise of Cleveland, + and Moses S. Beach, of the Sun, with his daughter Emma, a girl of + seventeen. Dan Slote was likely to be there, too, and Jack, and + the Doctor, and Charles J. Langdon, of Elmira, New York, a boy of + eighteen, who had conceived a deep admiration for the brilliant + writer. They were fortunate ones who first gathered to hear those + daring, wonderful letters. + + But the benefit was a mutual one. He furnished a priceless + entertainment, and he derived something equally priceless in + return—the test of immediate audience and the boon of criticism. + Mrs. Fairbanks especially was frankly sincere. Mr. Severance + wrote afterward: + + One afternoon I saw him tearing up a bunch of the soft, white + paper- copy paper, I guess the newspapers call it-on which he had + written something, and throwing the fragments into the + Mediterranean. I inquired of him why he cast away the fruits of his + labors in that manner. + + “Well,” he drawled, “Mrs. Fairbanks thinks it oughtn't to be + printed, and, like as not, she is right.” + + And Emma Beach (Mrs. Abbott Thayer) remembers hearing him say: + + “Well, Mrs. Fairbanks has just destroyed another four hours' work + for me.” + + Sometimes he played chess with Emma Beach, who thought him a + great hero because, once when a crowd of men were tormenting a + young lad, a passenger, Mark Twain took the boy's part and made + them desist. + + “I am sure I was right, too,” she declares; “heroism came natural + to him.” + + Mr. Severance recalls another incident which, as he says, was + trivial enough, but not easy to forget: + + We were having a little celebration over the birthday anniversary + of Mrs. Duncan, wife of our captain. Mark Twain got up and made a + little speech, in which he said Mrs. Duncan was really older than + Methuselah because she knew a lot of things that Methuselah never + heard of. Then he mentioned a number of more or less modern + inventions, and wound up by saying, “What did Methuselah know + about a barbed-wire fence?” + + Except Following the Equator, The Innocents Abroad comes nearer + to being history than any other of Mark Twain's travel-books. The + notes for it were made on the spot, and there was plenty of fact, + plenty of fresh, new experience, plenty of incident to set down. + His idea of descriptive travel in those days was to tell the + story as it happened; also, perhaps, he had not then acquired the + courage of his inventions. We may believe that the adventures + with Jack, Dan, and the Doctor are elaborated here and there; but + even those happened substantially as recorded. There is little to + add, then, to the story of that halcyon trip, and not much to + elucidate. + + The old note-books give a light here and there that is + interesting. It is curious to be looking through them now, trying + to realize that these penciled memoranda were the fresh, first + impressions that would presently grow into the world's most + delightful book of travel; that they were set down in the very + midst of that care-free little company that frolicked through + Italy, climbed wearily the arid Syrian hills. They are all dead + now; but to us they are as alive and young to-day as when they + followed the footprints of the Son of Man through Palestine, and + stood at last before the Sphinx, impressed and awed by its “five + thousand slow-revolving years.” + + Some of the items consist of no more than a few terse, suggestive + words—serious, humorous, sometimes profane. Others are + statistical, descriptive, elaborated. Also there are + drawings—“not copied,” he marks them, with a pride not always + justified by the result. The earlier notes are mainly comments on + the “pilgrims,” the freak pilgrims: “the Frenchy-looking woman + who owns a dog and keeps up an interminable biography of him to + the passengers”; the “long-legged, simple, wide-mouthed, + horse-laughing young fellow who once made a sea voyage to + Fortress Monroe, and quotes eternally from his experiences”; + also, there is reference to another young man, “good, + accommodating, pleasant but fearfully green.” This young person + would become the “Interrogation Point,” in due time, and have his + picture on page 71 (old edition), while opposite him, on page 70, + would appear the “oracle," identified as one Doctor Andrews, who + (the note-book says) had the habit of “smelling in guide-books + for knowledge and then trying to play it for old information that + has been festering in his brain.” Sometimes there are abstract + notes such as: + + How lucky Adam was. He knew when he said a good thing that no one + had ever said it before. + + Of the “character” notes, the most important and elaborated is + that which presents the “Poet Lariat.” This is the entry, + somewhat epitomized: + + BLOODGOOD H. CUTTER + He is fifty years old, and small of his age. He dresses in + homespun, and is a simple-minded, honest, old-fashioned farmer, + with a strange proclivity for writing rhymes. He writes them on all + possible subjects, and gets them printed on slips of paper, with + his portrait at the head. These he will give to any man who comes + along, whether he has anything against him or not.... + Dan said: + “It must be a great happiness to you to sit down at the close of + day and put its events all down in rhymes and poetry, like Byron + and Shakespeare and those fellows.” + “Oh yes, it is—it is—Why, many's the time I've had to get up in the + night when it comes on me: + Whether we're on the sea or the land We've all got to go at the + word of command— + “Hey! how's that?” + + A curious character was Cutter—a Long Island farmer with the + obsession of rhyme. In his old age, in an interview, he said: + + “Mark was generally writing and he was glum. He would write what + we were doing, and I would write poetry, and Mark would say: + + “'For Heaven's sake, Cutter, keep your poems to yourself.' + + “Yes, Mark was pretty glum, and he was generally writing.” + + Poor old Poet Lariat—dead now with so many others of that happy + crew. We may believe that Mark learned to be “glum” when he saw + the Lariat approaching with his sheaf of rhymes. We may believe, + too, that he was “generally writing.” He contributed fifty-three + letters to the Alta during that five months and six to the + Tribune. They would average about two columns nonpareil each, + which is to say four thousand words, or something like two + hundred and fifty thousand words in all. To turn out an average + of fifteen hundred words a day, with continuous sight-seeing + besides, one must be generally writing during any odd intervals; + those who are wont to regard Mark Twain as lazy may consider + these statistics. That he detested manual labor is true enough, + but at the work for which he was fitted and intended it may be + set down here upon authority (and despite his own frequent + assertions to the contrary) that to his last year he was the most + industrious of men. + + + + + LXI. THE INNOCENTS ABROAD + + + It was Dan, Jack, and the Doctor who with Mark Twain wandered + down through Italy and left moral footprints that remain to this + day. The Italian guides are wary about showing pieces of the True + Cross, fragments of the Crown of Thorns, and the bones of saints + since then. They show them, it is true, but with a smile; the + name of Mark Twain is a touch-stone to test their statements. Not + a guide in Italy but has heard the tale of that iconoclastic + crew, and of the book which turned their marvels into myths, + their relics into bywords. + + It was Doctor Jackson, Colonel Denny, Doctor Birch, and Samuel + Clemens who evaded the quarantine and made the perilous night + trip to Athens and looked upon the Parthenon and the sleeping + city by moonlight. It is all set down in the notes, and the + account varies little from that given in the book; only he does + not tell us that Captain Duncan and the quartermaster, Pratt, + connived at the escapade, or how the latter watched the shore in + anxious suspense until he heard the whistle which was their + signal to be taken aboard. It would have meant six months' + imprisonment if they had been captured, for there was no + discretion in the Greek law. + + It was T. D. Crocker, A. N. Sanford, Col. Peter Kinney, and + William Gibson who were delegated to draft the address to the + Emperor of Russia at Yalta, with Samuel L. Clemens as chairman of + that committee. The chairman wrote the address, the opening + sentence of which he grew so weary of hearing: + + We are a handful of private citizens of America, traveling simply + for recreation, and unostentatiously, as becomes our unofficial + state. + + The address is all set down in the notes, and there also exists + the first rough draft, with the emendations in his own hand. He + deplores the time it required: + + That job is over. Writing addresses to emperors is not my strong + suit. However, if it is not as good as it might be it doesn't + signify—the other committeemen ought to have helped me write it; + they had nothing to do, and I had my hands full. But for bothering + with this I would have caught up entirely with my New York Tribune + correspondence and nearly up with the San Francisco. + + They wanted him also to read the address to the Emperor, but he + pointed out that the American consul was the proper person for + that office. He tells how the address was presented: + + August 26th. The Imperial carriages were in waiting at eleven, + and at twelve we were at the palace.... + + The Consul for Odessa read the address and the Czar said + frequently, “Good—very good; indeed”—and at the close, “I am + very, very grateful.” + + It was not improper for him to set down all this, and much more, + in his own note-book—not then for publication. It was in fact a + very proper record—for today. + + One incident of the imperial audience Mark Twain omitted from his + book, perhaps because the humor of it had not yet become + sufficiently evident. “The humorous perception of a thing is a + pretty slow growth sometimes,” he once remarked. It was about + seventeen years before he could laugh enjoyably at a slight + mistake he made at the Emperor's reception. He set down a + memorandum of it, then, for fear it might be lost: + + There were a number of great dignitaries of the Empire there, and + although, as a general thing, they were dressed in citizen's + clothing, I observed that the most of them wore a very small piece + of ribbon in the lapels of their coats. That little touch of color + struck my fancy, and it seemed to me a good idea to add it to my + own attractions; not imagining that it had any special + significance. So I stepped aside, hunted up a bit of red ribbon, + and ornamented my lapel with it. Presently, Count Festetics, the + Grand Master of ceremonies, and the only man there who was + gorgeously arrayed, in full official costume, began to show me a + great many attentions. He was particularly polite, and pleasant, + and anxious to be of service to me. Presently, he asked me what + order of nobility I belonged to? I said, “I didn't belong to any.” + Then he asked me what order of knighthood I belonged to? I said, + “None.” Then he asked me what the red ribbon in my buttonhole stood + for? I saw, at once, what an ass I had been making of myself, and + was accordingly confused and embarrassed. I said the first thing + that came into my mind, and that was that the ribbon was merely the + symbol of a club of journalists to which I belonged, and I was not + pursued with any more of Count Festetic's attentions. + Later, I got on very familiar terms with an old gentleman, whom I + took to be the head gardener, and walked him all about the gardens, + slipping my arm into his without invitation, yet without demur on + his part, and by and by was confused again when I found that he was + not a gardener at all, but the Lord High Admiral of Russia! I + almost made up my mind that I would never call on an Emperor again. + + Like all Mediterranean excursionists, those first pilgrims were + insatiable collectors of curios, costumes, and all manner of + outlandish things. Dan Slote had the stateroom hung and piled + with such gleanings. At Constantinople his room-mate writes: + + I thought Dan had got the state-room pretty full of rubbish at + last, but awhile ago his dragoman arrived with a brand-new ghastly + tombstone of the Oriental pattern, with his name handsomely carved + and gilted on it in Turkish characters. That fellow will buy a + Circassian slave next. + + It was Church, Denny, Jack, Davis, Dan, Moult, and Mark Twain who + made the “long trip” through Syria from Beirut to Jerusalem with + their elaborate camping outfit and decrepit nags “Jericho,” + “Baalbec,” and the rest. It was better camping than that Humboldt + journey of six years before, though the horses were not so + dissimilar, and altogether it was a hard, nerve-racking + experience, climbing the arid hills of Palestine in that torrid + summer heat. Nobody makes that trip in summer-time now. Tourists + hurry out of Syria before the first of April, and they do not go + back before November. One brief quotation from Mark Twain's book + gives us an idea of what that early party of pilgrims had to + undergo: + + We left Damascus at noon and rode across the plain a couple of + hours, and then the party stopped a while in the shade of some fig- + trees to give me a chance to rest. It was the hottest day we had + seen yet—the sun-flames shot down like the shafts of fire that + stream out before a blow-pipe; the rays seemed to fall in a deluge + on the head and pass downward like rain from a roof. I imagined I + could distinguish between the floods of rays. I thought I could + tell when each flood struck my head, when it reached my shoulders, + and when the next one came. It was terrible. + + He had been ill with cholera at Damascus, a light attack; but any + attack of that dread disease is serious enough. He tells of this + in the book, but he does not mention, either in the book or in + his notes, the attack which Dan Slote had some days later. It + remained for William F. Church, of the party, to relate that + incident, for it was the kind of thing that Mark Twain was not + likely to record, or even to remember. Doctor Church was a deacon + with orthodox views and did not approve of Mark Twain; he thought + him sinful, irreverent, profane. + + “He was the worst man I ever knew,” Church said; then he added, + “And the best.” + + What happened was this: At the end of a terrible day of heat, + when the party had camped on the edge of a squalid Syrian + village, Dan was taken suddenly ill. It was cholera, beyond + doubt. Dan could not go on—he might never go on. The chances were + that way. It was a serious matter all around. To wait with Dan + meant to upset their travel schedule—it might mean to miss the + ship. Consultation was held and a resolution passed (the pilgrims + were always passing resolutions) to provide for Dan as well as + possible, and leave him behind. Clemens, who had remained with + Dan, suddenly appeared and said: + + “Gentlemen, I understand that you are going to leave Dan Slote + here alone. I'll be d—-d if I do!” + + And he didn't. He stayed there and brought Dan into Jerusalem, a + few days late, but convalescent. + + Perhaps most of them were not always reverent during that Holy + Land trip. It was a trying journey, and after fierce days of + desert hills the reaction might not always spare even the holiest + memories. Jack was particularly sinful. When they learned the + price for a boat on Galilee, and the deacons who had traveled + nearly half around the world to sail on that sacred water were + confounded by the charge, Jack said: + + “Well, Denny, do you wonder now that Christ walked?” + + It was the irreverent Jack who one morning (they had camped the + night before by the ruins of Jericho) refused to get up to see + the sun rise across the Jordan. Deacon Church went to his tent. + + “Jack, my boy, get up. Here is the place where the Israelites + crossed over into the Promised Land, and beyond are the mountains + of Moab, where Moses lies buried.” + + “Moses who!” said Jack. + + “Oh, Jack, my boy, Moses, the great lawgiver—who led the + Israelites out of Egypt-forty years through the wilderness—to the + Promised Land.” + + “Forty years!” said Jack. “How far was it?” + + “It was three hundred miles, Jack; a great wilderness, and he + brought them through in safety.” + + Jack regarded him with scorn. “Huh, Moses—three hundred miles + forty years—why, Ben Holiday would have brought them through in + thirty-six hours!”—[Ben Holiday, owner of the Overland stages, + and a man of great executive ability. This incident, a true one, + is more elaborately told in Roughing It, but it seems pertinent + here.] + + Jack probably learned more about the Bible during that trip-its + history and its heroes-than during all his former years. Nor was + Jack the only one of that group thus benefited. The sacred + landmarks of Palestine inspire a burning interest in the + Scriptures, and Mark Twain probably did not now regret those + early Sunday-school lessons; certainly he did not fail to review + them exhaustively on that journey. His note-books fairly overflow + with Bible references; the Syrian chapters in The Innocents + Abroad are permeated with the poetry and legendary beauty of the + Bible story. The little Bible he carried on that trip, bought in + Constantinople, was well worn by the time they reached the ship + again at Jaffa. He must have read it with a large and persistent + interest; also with a double benefit. For, besides the knowledge + acquired, he was harvesting a profit—probably unsuspected at the + time—-viz., the influence of the most direct and beautiful + English—the English of the King James version—which could not + fail to affect his own literary method at that impressionable + age. We have already noted his earlier admiration for that noble + and simple poem, “The Burial of Moses,” which in the Palestine + note-book is copied in full. All the tendency of his expression + lay that way, and the intense consideration of stately Bible + phrase and imagery could hardly fail to influence his mental + processes. The very distinct difference of style, as shown in The + Innocents Abroad and in his earlier writings, we may believe was + in no small measure due to his study of the King James version + during those weeks in Palestine. + + He bought another Bible at Jerusalem; but it was not for himself. + It was a little souvenir volume bound in olive and balsam wood, + and on the fly-leaf is inscribed: + + Mrs. Jane Clemens from her son. Jerusalem, Sept. 24, 1867. + + There is one more circumstance of that long cruise-recorded + neither in the book nor the notes—an incident brief, but of more + importance in the life of Samuel Clemens than any heretofore set + down. It occurred in the beautiful Bay of Smyrna, on the fifth or + sixth of September, while the vessel lay there for the Ephesus + trip. + + Reference has been made to young Charles Langdon, of Elmira (the + “Charley” once mentioned in the Innocents), as an admirer of Mark + Twain. There was a good deal of difference in their ages, and + they were seldom of the same party; but sometimes the boy invited + the journalist to his cabin and, boy-like, exhibited his + treasures. He had two sisters at home; and of Olivia, the + youngest, he had brought a dainty miniature done on ivory in + delicate tints—a sweet-pictured countenance, fine and spiritual. + On that fateful day in the day of Smyrna, Samuel Clemens, + visiting in young Langdon's cabin, was shown this portrait. He + looked at it with long admiration, and spoke of it reverently, + for the delicate face seemed to him to be something more than a + mere human likeness. Each time he came, after that, he asked to + see the picture, and once even begged to be allowed to take it + away with him. The boy would not agree to this, and the elder man + looked long and steadily at the miniature, resolving in his mind + that some day he would meet the owner of that lovely face—a + purpose for once in accord with that which the fates had arranged + for him, in the day when all things were arranged, the day of the + first beginning. + + + + + LXII. THE RETURN OF THE PILGRIMS + + + The last note-book entry bears date of October 11th: + + At sea, somewhere in the neighborhood of Malta. Very stormy. + Terrible death to be talked to death. The storm has blown two small + land birds and a hawk to sea and they came on board. Sea full of + flying-fish. + + That is all. There is no record of the week's travel in Spain, + which a little group of four made under the picturesque Gibraltar + guide, Benunes, still living and quite as picturesque at last + accounts. This side-trip is covered in a single brief paragraph + in the Innocents, and the only account we have of it is in a home + letter, from Cadiz, of October 24th: + + We left Gibraltar at noon and rode to Algeciras (4 hours), thus + dodging the quarantine—took dinner, and then rode horseback all + night in a swinging trot, and at daylight took a caleche (a-wheeled + vehicle), and rode 5 hours—then took cars and traveled till twelve + at night. That landed us at Seville, and we were over the hard part + of our trip and somewhat tired. Since then we have taken things + comparatively easy, drifting around from one town to another and + attracting a good deal of attention—for I guess strangers do not + wander through Andalusia and the other southern provinces of Spain + often. The country is precisely what it was when Don Quixote and + Sancho Panza were possible characters. + But I see now what the glory of Spain must have been when it was + under Moorish domination. No, I will not say that—but then when one + is carried away, infatuated, entranced, with the wonders of the + Alhambra and the supernatural beauty of the Alcazar, he is apt to + overflow with admiration for the splendid intellects that created + them. + + We may wish that he had left us a chapter of that idyllic + journey, but it will never be written now. A night or two before + the vessel reached New York there was the usual good-by assembly, + and for this occasion, at Mrs. Severance's request, Mark Twain + wrote some verses. They were not especially notable, for meter + and rhyme did not come easy to him, but one prophetic stanza is + worth remembering. In the opening lines the passengers are + referred to as a fleet of vessels, then follows: + + Lo! other ships of that parted fleet Shall suffer this fate or + that: One shall be wrecked, another shall sink, Or ground on + treacherous flat. Some shall be famed in many lands As good + ships, fast and fair, And some shall strangely disappear, Men + know not when or where. + + The Quaker City returned to America on November 19, 1867, and + Mark Twain found himself, if not famous, at least in very wide + repute. The fifty-three letters to the Alta and the half-dozen to + the New York Tribune had carried his celebrity into every corner + of the States and Territories. Vivid, fearless, full of fresh + color, humor, poetry, they came as a revelation to a public weary + of the driveling, tiresome travel-letters of that period. They + preached a new gospel in travel-literature: the gospel of seeing + with an overflowing honesty; a gospel of sincerity in according + praises to whatever seemed genuine, and ridicule to the things + considered sham. It was the gospel that Mark Twain would continue + to preach during his whole career. It became his chief literary + message to the world-a world waiting for that message. + + Moreover, the letters were literature. He had received, from + whatever source, a large and very positive literary impulse, a + loftier conception and expression. It was at Tangier that he + first struck the grander chord, the throbbing cadence of human + story. + + Here is a crumbling wall that was old when Columbus discovered + America; old when Peter the Hermit roused the knightly men of the + Middle Ages to arm for the first Crusade; old when Charlemagne + and his paladins beleaguered enchanted castles and battled with + giants and genii in the fabled days of the olden time; old when + Christ and his disciples walked the earth; stood where it stands + to-day when the lips of Memnon were vocal and men bought and sold + in the streets of ancient Thebes. + + This is pure poetry. He had never touched so high a strain + before, but he reached it often after that, and always with an + ever-increasing mastery and confidence. In Venice, in Rome, in + Athens, through the Holy Land, his retrospection becomes a + stately epic symphony, a processional crescendo that swings ever + higher until it reaches that sublime strain, the ageless + contemplation of the Sphinx. We cannot forego a paragraph or two + of that word-picture: + + After years of waiting it was before me at last. The great face was + so sad, so earnest, so longing, so patient. There was a dignity not + of earth in its mien, and in its countenance a benignity such as + never anything human wore. It was stone, but it seemed sentient. If + ever image of stone thought, it was thinking. It was looking toward + the verge of the landscape, yet looking at nothing—nothing but + distance and vacancy. It was looking over and beyond everything of + the present, and far into the past.... It was thinking of the wars + of the departed ages; of the empires it had seen created and + destroyed; of the nations whose birth it had witnessed, whose + progress it had watched, whose annihilation it had noted; of the + joy and sorrow, the life and death, the grandeur and decay, of five + thousand slow-revolving years.... + The Sphinx is grand in its loneliness; it is imposing in its + magnitude; it is impressive in the mystery that hangs over its + story. And there is that in the overshadowing majesty of this + eternal figure of stone, with its accusing memory of the deeds of + all ages, which reveals to one something of what we shall feel when + we shall stand at last in the awful presence of God. + + Then that closing word of Egypt. He elaborated it for the book, + and did not improve it. Let us preserve here its original form. + + We are glad to have seen Egypt. We are glad to have seen that old + land which taught Greece her letters—and through Greece, Rome—and + through Rome, the world—that venerable cradle of culture and + refinement which could have humanized and civilized the Children of + Israel, but allowed them to depart out of her borders savages—those + Children whom we still revere, still love, and whose sad + shortcomings we still excuse—not because they were savages, but + because they were the chosen savages of God. + + The Holy Land letters alone would have brought him fame. They + presented the most graphic and sympathetic picture of Syrian + travel ever written—one that will never become antiquated or + obsolete so long as human nature remains unchanged. From + beginning to end the tale is rarely, reverently told. Its closing + paragraph has not been surpassed in the voluminous literature of + that solemn land: + + Palestine sits in sackcloth and ashes. Over it broods the spell of + a curse that has withered its fields and fettered its energies. + Where Sodom and Gomorrah reared their domes and towers that solemn + sea now floods the plain, in whose bitter waters no living thing + exists—over whose waveless surface the blistering air hangs + motionless and dead—about whose borders nothing grows but weeds and + scattering tufts of cane, and that treacherous fruit that promises + refreshment to parching lips, but turns to ashes at the touch. + Nazareth is forlorn; about that ford of Jordan where the hosts of + Israel entered the Promised Land with songs of rejoicing one finds + only a squalid camp of fantastic Bedouins of the desert; Jericho + the accursed lies a moldering ruin today, even as Joshua's miracle + left it more than three thousand years ago; Bethlehem and Bethany, + in their poverty and their humiliation, have nothing about them now + to remind one that they once knew the high honor of the Saviour's + presence; the hallowed spot where the shepherds watched their + flocks by night, and where the angels sang Peace on earth, goodwill + to men, is untenanted by any living creature, and unblessed by any + feature that is pleasant to the eye. Renowned Jerusalem itself, the + stateliest name in history, has lost all its ancient grandeur, and + is become a pauper village; the riches of Solomon are no longer + there to compel the admiration of visiting Oriental queens; the + wonderful temple which was the pride and the glory of Israel is + gone, and the Ottoman crescent is lifted above the spot where, on + that most memorable day in the annals of the world, they reared the + Holy Cross. The noted Sea of Galilee, where Roman fleets once rode + at anchor and the disciples of the Saviour sailed in their ships, + was long ago deserted by the devotees of war and commerce, and its + borders are a silent wilderness; Capernaum is a shapeless ruin; + Magdala is the home of beggared Arabs; Bethsaida and Chorazin have + vanished from the earth, and the “desert places” round about them + where thousands of men once listened to the Saviour's voice and ate + the miraculous bread sleep in the hush of a solitude that is + inhabited only by birds of prey and skulking foxes. + Palestine is desolate and unlovely. And why should it be otherwise? + Can the curse of the Deity beautify a land? + + It would be easy to quote pages here—a pictorial sequence from + Gibraltar to Athens, from Athens to Egypt, a radiant panoramic + march. In time he would write technically better. He would avoid + solecism, he would become a greater master of vocabulary and + phrase, but in all the years ahead he would never match the + lambent bloom and spontaneity of those fresh, first impressions + of Mediterranean lands and seas. No need to mention the humor, + the burlesque, the fearless, unrestrained ridicule of old masters + and of sacred relics, so called. These we have kept familiar with + much repetition. Only, the humor had grown more subtle, more + restrained; the burlesque had become impersonal and harmless, the + ridicule so frank and good-natured, that even the old masters + themselves might have enjoyed it, while the most devoted + churchman, unless blinded by bigotry, would find in it + satisfaction, rather than sacrilege. + + The final letter was written for the New York Herald after the + arrival, and was altogether unlike those that preceded it. Gaily + satirical and personal—inclusively so—it might better have been + left unwritten, for it would seem to have given needless offense + to a number of goodly people, whose chief sin was the sedateness + of years. However, it is all past now, and those who were old + then, and perhaps queer and pious and stingy, do not mind any + more, and those who were young and frivolous have all grown old + too, and most of them have set out on the still farther voyage. + Somewhere, it may be, they gather, now; and then, and lightly, + tenderly recall their old-time journeying. + + + + + LXIII. IN WASHINGTON—A PUBLISHING PROPOSITION + + + Clemens remained but one day in New York. Senator Stewart had + written, about the time of the departure of the Quaker City, + offering him the position of private secretary—a position which + was to give him leisure for literary work, with a supporting + salary as well. Stewart no doubt thought it would be considerably + to his advantage to have the brilliant writer and lecturer + attached to his political establishment, and Clemens likewise saw + possibilities in the arrangement. From Naples, in August, he had + written accepting Stewart's offer; he lost no time now in + discussing the matter in person.—[In a letter home, August 9th, + he referred to the arrangement: “I wrote to Bill Stewart to-day + accepting his private secretaryship in Washington, next winter.”] + + There seems to have been little difficulty in concluding the + arrangement. When Clemens had been in Washington a week we find + him writing: + + DEAR FOLKS, Tired and sleepy—been in Congress all day and making + newspaper acquaintances. Stewart is to look up a clerkship in the + Patent Office for Orion. Things necessarily move slowly where there + is so much business and such armies of office-seekers to be + attended to. I guess it will be all right. I intend it shall be all + right. + I have 18 invitations to lecture, at $100 each, in various parts of + the Union—have declined them all. I am for business now. + Belong on the Tribune Staff, and shall write occasionally. Am + offered the same berth to-day on the Herald by letter. Shall write + Mr. Bennett and accept, as soon as I hear from Tribune that it will + not interfere. Am pretty well known now—intend to be better known. + Am hobnobbing with these old Generals and Senators and other + humbugs for no good purpose. Don't have any more trouble making + friends than I did in California. All serene. Good-by. Shall + continue on the Alta. Yours affectionately, SAM. + P.S.—I room with Bill Stewart and board at Willard's Hotel. + + But the secretary arrangement was a brief matter. It is + impossible to conceive of Mark Twain as anybody's secretary, + especially as the secretary of Senator Stewart. —[In Senator + Stewart's memoirs he refers unpleasantly to Mark Twain, and after + relating several incidents that bear only strained relations to + the truth, states that when the writer returned from the Holy + Land he (Stewart) offered him a secretaryship as a sort of + charity. He adds that Mark Twain's behavior on his premises was + such that a threat of a thrashing was necessary. The reason for + such statements becomes apparent, however, when he adds that in + 'Roughing It' the author accuses him of cheating, prints a + picture of him with a hatch over his eye, and claims to have + given him a sound thrashing, none of which statements, save only + the one concerning the picture (an apparently unforgivable + offense to his dignity), is true, as the reader may easily + ascertain for himself.] + + Within a few weeks he was writing humorous accounts of “My Late + Senatorial Secretaryship,” “Facts Concerning the Recent + Resignation,” etc., all good-natured burlesque, but inspired, we + may believe, by the change: These articles appeared in the New + York Tribune, the New York Citizen, and the Galaxy Magazine. + + There appears to have been no ill-feeling at this time between + Clemens and Stewart. If so, it is not discoverable in any of the + former's personal or newspaper correspondence. In fact, in his + article relating to his “late senatorial secretaryship” he puts + the joke, so far as it is a joke, on Senator James W. Nye, + probably as an additional punishment for Nye's failure to appear + on the night of his lecture. He established headquarters with a + brilliant newspaper correspondent named Riley. “One of the best + men in Washington—or elsewhere,” he tells us in a brief sketch of + that person.—[See Riley, newspaper correspondent. Sketches New + and Old.]—He had known Riley in San Francisco; the two were + congenial, and settled down to their several undertakings. + + Clemens was chiefly concerned over two things: he wished to make + money and he wished to secure a government appointment for Orion. + He had used up the most of his lecture accumulations, and was + moderately in debt. His work was in demand at good rates, for + those days, and with working opportunity he could presently + dispose of his financial problem. The Tribune was anxious for + letters; the Enterprise and Alta were waiting for them; the + Herald, the Chicago Tribune, the magazines—all had solicited + contributions; the lecture bureaus pursued him. Personally his + outlook was bright. + + The appointment for Orion was a different matter. The powers were + not especially interested in a brother; there were too many + brothers and assorted relatives on the official waiting-list + already. Clemens was offered appointments for himself—a + consulship, a post-mastership; even that of San Francisco. From + the Cabinet down, the Washington political contingent had read + his travel-letters, and was ready to recognize officially the + author of them in his own person and personality. + + Also, socially: Mark Twain found himself all at once in the midst + of receptions, dinners, and speech-making; all very exciting for + a time at least, but not profitable, not conducive to work. At a + dinner of the Washington Correspondents Club his response to the + toast, “Women,” was pronounced by Schuyler Colfax to be “the best + after dinner speech ever made.” Certainly it was a refreshing + departure from the prosy or clumsy-witted efforts common to that + period. He was coming altogether into his own.—[This is the first + of Mark Twain's after-dinner speeches to be preserved. The reader + will find it complete, as reported next day, in Appendix G, at + the end of last volume.] + + He was not immediately interested in the matter of book + publication. The Jumping Frog book was popular, and in England + had been issued by Routledge; but the royalty returns were modest + enough and slow in arrival. His desire was for prompter results. + His interest in book publication had never been an eager one, and + related mainly to the advertising it would furnish, which he did + not now need; or to the money return, in which he had no great + faith. Yet at this very moment a letter for him was lying in the + Tribune office in New York which would bring the book idea into + first prominence and spell the beginning of his fortune. + + Among those who had read and found delight in the Tribune letters + was Elisha Bliss, Jr., of the American Publishing Company, of + Hartford. Bliss was a shrewd and energetic man, with a keen + appreciation for humor and the American fondness for that + literary quality. He had recently undertaken the management of a + Hartford concern, and had somewhat alarmed its conservative + directorate by publishing books that furnished entertainment to + the reader as well as moral instruction. Only his success in + paying dividends justified this heresy and averted his downfall. + Two days after the arrival of the Quaker City Bliss wrote the + letter above mentioned. It ran as follows: + + OFFICE OF THE AMERICAN PUBLISHING CO. HARTFORD, + CONN., November 21, 1867. + + SAMUEL L. CLEMENS, ESQ., Tribune Office, New York. + + DEAR SIR,—We take the liberty to address you this, in place of a + letter which we had recently written and were about to forward to + you, not knowing your arrival home was expected so soon. We are + desirous of obtaining from you a work of some kind, perhaps + compiled from your letters from the past, etc., with such + interesting additions as may be proper. We are the publishers of + A. D. Richardson's works, and flatter ourselves that we can give + an author a favorable term and do as full justice to his + productions as any other house in the country. We are perhaps the + oldest subscription house in the country, and have never failed + to give a book an immense circulation. We sold about 100,000 + copies of Richardson's F. D. and E. ('Field, Dungeon and + Escape'), and are now printing 41,000 of 'Beyond the + Mississippi', and large orders ahead. If you have any thought of + writing a book, or could be induced to do so, we should be + pleased to see you, and will do so. Will you do us the favor of + reply at once, at your earliest convenience. + + Very truly etc., + E. BLISS, JR., Secretary. + + After ten days' delay this letter was forwarded to the Tribune + bureau in Washington, where Clemens received it. He replied + promptly. + + WASHINGTON, December 2, 1867. + + E. BLISS, JR., ESQ., Secretary American Publishing Co. + + DEAR SIR,—I only received your favor of November 21st last night, + at the rooms of the Tribune Bureau here. It was forwarded from + the Tribune office, New York where it had lain eight or ten days. + This will be a sufficient apology for the seeming discourtesy of + my silence. + + I wrote fifty-two letters for the San Francisco Alta California + during the Quaker City excursion, about half of which number have + been printed thus far. The Alta has few exchanges in the East, + and I suppose scarcely any of these letters have been copied on + this side of the Rocky Mountains. I could weed them of their + chief faults of construction and inelegancies of expression, and + make a volume that would be more acceptable in many respects than + any I could now write. When those letters were written my + impressions were fresh, but now they have lost that freshness; + they were warm then, they are cold now. I could strike out + certain letters, and write new ones wherewith to supply their + places. If you think such a book would suit your purpose, please + drop me a line, specifying the size and general style of the + volume—when the matter ought to be ready; whether it should have + pictures in it or not; and particularly what your terms with me + would be, and what amount of money I might possibly make out of + it. The latter clause has a degree of importance for me which is + almost beyond my own comprehension. But you understand that, of + course. + + I have other propositions for a book, but have doubted the + propriety of interfering with good newspaper engagements, except + my way as an author could be demonstrated to be plain before me. + But I know Richardson, and learned from him some months ago + something of an idea of the subscription plan of publishing. If + that is your plan invariably it looks safe. + +I am on the New York Tribune staff here as an “occasional,” among other +things, and a note from you addressed to Very truly, etc., +SAM. L. CLEMENS, New York Tribune Bureau, Washington will find me, +without fail. + + The exchange of those two letters marked the beginning of one of + the most notable publishing connections in American literary + history. + + Consummation, however, was somewhat delayed. Bliss was ill when + the reply came, and could not write again in detail until nearly + a month later. In this letter he recited the profits made by + Richardson and others through subscription publication, and named + the royalties paid. Richardson had received four per cent. of the + sale price, a small enough rate for these later days; but the + cost of manufacture was larger then, and the sale and delivery of + books through agents has ever been an expensive process. Even + Horace Greeley had received but a fraction more on his Great + American Conflict. Bliss especially suggested and emphasized a + “humorous work—that is to say, a work humorously inclined.” He + added that they had two arrangements for paying authors: outright + purchase, and royalty. He invited a meeting in New York to + arrange terms. + + + + + LXIV. OLIVIA LANGDON + + + Clemens did in fact go to New York that same evening, to spend + Christmas with Dan Slote, and missed Bliss's second letter. It + was no matter. Fate had his affairs properly in hand, and had + prepared an event of still larger moment than the publication + even of Innocents Abroad. There was a pleasant reunion at Dan + Slote's. He wrote home about it: + + Charley Langdon, Jack Van Nostrand, Dan and I (all Quaker City + night-hawks) had a blow-out at Dan's house and a lively talk over + old times. I just laughed till my sides ached at some of our + reminiscences. It was the unholiest gang that ever cavorted through + Palestine, but those are the best boys in the world. + + This, however, was not the event; it was only preliminary to it. + We are coming to that now. At the old St. Nicholas Hotel, which + stood on the west of Broadway between Spring and Broome streets, + there were stopping at this time Jervis Langdon, a wealty + coal-dealer and mine-owner of Elmira, his son Charles and his + daughter Olivia, whose pictured face Samuel Clemens had first + seen in the Bay of Smyrna one September day. Young Langdon had + been especially anxious to bring his distinguished Quaker City + friend and his own people together, and two days before Christmas + Samuel Clemens was invited to dine at the hotel. He went very + willingly. The lovely face of that miniature had been often a + part of his waking dreams. For the first time now he looked upon + its reality. Long afterward he said: + + “It is forty years ago. From that day to this she has never been + out of my mind.” + + Charles Dickens was in New York then, and gave a reading that + night in Steinway Hall. The Langdons went, and Samuel Clemens + accompanied them. He remembered afterward that Dickens wore a + black velvet coat with a fiery red flower in his buttonhole, and + that he read the storm scene from Copperfield—the death of James + Steerforth. But he remembered still more clearly the face and + dress of that slender girlish figure at his side. + + Olivia Langdon was twenty-two years old at this time, delicate as + the miniature he had seen, fragile to look upon, though no longer + with the shattered health of her girlhood. At sixteen, through a + fall upon the ice, she had become a complete invalid, confined to + her bed for two years, unable to sit, even when supported, unable + to lie in any position except upon her back. Great physicians and + surgeons, one after another, had done their best for her but she + had failed steadily until every hope had died. Then, when nothing + else was left to try, a certain Doctor Newton, of spectacular + celebrity, who cured by “laying on of hands,” was brought to + Elmira to see her. Doctor Newton came into the darkened room and + said: + + “Open the windows—we must have light!” + + They protested that she could not bear the light, but the windows + were opened. Doctor Newton came to the bedside of the helpless + girl, delivered a short, fervent prayer, put his arm under her + shoulders, and bade her sit up. She had not moved for two years, + and the family were alarmed, but she obeyed, and he assisted her + into a chair. Sensation came back to her limbs. With his + assistance she even made a feeble attempt to walk. He left then, + saying that she would gradually improve, and in time be well, + though probably never very strong. On the same day he healed a + boy, crippled and drawn with fever. + + It turned out as he had said. Olivia Langdon improved steadily, + and now at twenty-two, though not robust—she was never that—she + was comparatively well. Gentle, winning, lovable, she was the + family idol, and Samuel Clemens joined in their worship from the + moment of that first meeting. + + Olivia Langdon, on her part, was at first dazed and fascinated, + rather than attracted, by this astonishing creature, so unlike + any one she had ever known. Her life had been circumscribed, her + experiences of a simple sort. She had never seen anything + resembling him before. Indeed, nobody had. Somewhat carelessly, + even if correctly, attired; eagerly, rather than observantly, + attentive; brilliant and startling, rather than cultured, of + speech—a blazing human solitaire, unfashioned, unset, tossed by + the drift of fortune at her feet. He disturbed rather than + gratified her. She sensed his heresy toward the conventions and + forms which had been her gospel; his bantering, indifferent + attitude toward life—to her always so serious and sacred; she + suspected that he even might have unorthodox views on matters of + religion. When he had gone she somehow had the feeling that a + great fiery meteor of unknown portent had swept across her sky. + + To her brother, who was eager for her approval of his celebrity, + Miss Langdon conceded admiration. As for her father, he did not + qualify his opinion. With hearty sense of humor, and a keen + perception of verity and capability in men, Jervis Langdon + accepted Samuel Clemens from the start, and remained his stanch + admirer and friend. Clemens left that night with an invitation to + visit Elmira by and by, and with the full intention of + going—soon. Fate, however, had another plan. He did not see + Elmira for the better part of a year. + + He saw Miss Langdon again within the week. On New-Year's Day he + set forth to pay calls, after the fashion of the time—more lavish + then than now. Miss Langdon was receiving with Miss Alice Hooker, + a niece of Henry Ward Beecher, at the home of a Mrs. Berry; he + decided to go there first. With young Langdon he arrived at + eleven o'clock in the morning, and they did not leave until + midnight. If his first impression upon Olivia Langdon had been + meteoric, it would seem that he must now have become to her as a + streaming comet that swept from zenith to horizon. One thing is + certain: she had become to him the single, unvarying beacon of + his future years. He visited Henry Ward Beecher on that trip and + dined with him by invitation. Harriet Beecher Stowe was present, + and others of that eminent family. Likewise his old Quaker City + comrades, Moses S. and Emma Beach. It was a brilliant gathering, + a conclave of intellectual gods—a triumph to be there for one who + had been a printer-boy on the banks of the Mississippi, and only + a little while before a miner with pick and shovel. It was + gratifying to be so honored; it would be pleasant to write home; + but the occasion lacked something too—everything, in fact—for + when he ran his eye around the board the face of the minature was + not there. + + Still there were compensations; inadequate, of course, but + pleasant enough to remember. It was Sunday evening and the party + adjourned to Plymouth Church. After services Mr. Beecher invited + him to return home with him for a quiet talk. Evidently they had + a good time, for in the letter telling of these things Samuel + Clemens said: “Henry Ward Beecher is a brick.” + + + + + LXV. A CONTRACT WITH ELISHA BLISS, JR. + + + He returned to Washington without seeing Miss Langdon again, + though he would seem to have had permission to write—friendly + letters. A little later (it was on the evening of January 9th) he + lectured in Washington—on very brief notice indeed. The + arrangement for his appearance had been made by a friend during + his absence—“a friend,” Clemens declared afterward, “not entirely + sober at the time.” To his mother he wrote: + + I scared up a doorkeeper and was ready at the proper time, and by + pure good luck a tolerably good house assembled and I was saved. + I hardly knew what I was going to talk about, but it went off in + splendid style. + + The title of the lecture delivered was “The Frozen Truth”—“more + truth in the title than in the lecture,” according to his own + statement. What it dealt with is not remembered now. It had to do + with the Quaker City trip, perhaps, and it seems to have brought + a financial return which was welcome enough. Subsequently he + delivered it elsewhere; though just how far the tour extended + cannot be learned from the letters, and he had but little memory + of it in later years. + + There was some further correspondence with Bliss, then about the + 21st of January (1868) Clemens made a trip to Hartford to settle + the matter. Bliss had been particularly anxious to meet him, + personally and was a trifle disappointed with his appearance. + Mark Twain's traveling costume was neither new nor neat, and he + was smoking steadily a pipe of power. His general make-up was + hardly impressive. + + Bliss's disturbance was momentary. Once he began to talk the rest + did not matter. He was the author of those letters, and Bliss + decided that personally he was even greater than they. The + publisher, confined to his home with illness, offered him the + hospitality of his household. Also, he made him two propositions: + he would pay him ten thousand dollars cash for his copyright, or + he would pay five per cent. royalty, which was a fourth more than + Richardson had received. He advised the latter arrangement. + + Clemens had already taken advice and had discussed the project a + good deal with Richardson. The ten thousand dollars was a heavy + temptation, but he withstood it and closed on the royalty + basis—“the best business judgment I ever displayed,” he was wont + to declare. A letter written to his mother and sister near the + end of this Hartford stay is worth quoting pretty fully here, for + the information and “character” it contains. It bears date of + January 24th. + + This is a good week for me. I stopped in the Herald office, as I + came through New York, to see the boys on the staff, and young + James Gordon Bennett asked me to write twice a week, impersonally, + for the Herald, and said if I would I might have full swing, and + about anybody and everything I wanted to. I said I must have the + very fullest possible swing, and he said, “All right.” I said, + “It's a contract—” and that settled that matter. + I'll make it a point to write one letter a week anyhow. But the + best thing that has happened is here. This great American + Publishing Company kept on trying to bargain with me for a book + till I thought I would cut the matter short by coming up for a + talk. I met Henry Ward Beecher in Brooklyn, and with his usual + whole-souled way of dropping his own work to give other people a + lift when he gets a chance, he said: “Now, here, you are one of the + talented men of the age—nobody is going to deny that—but in matters + of business I don't suppose you know more than enough to come in + when it rains. I'll tell you what to do and how to do it.” And he + did. + And I listened well, and then came up here and made a splendid + contract for a Quaker City book of 5 or 600 large pages, with + illustrations, the manuscript to be placed in the publisher's hands + by the middle of July.—[The contract was not a formal one. There + was an exchange of letters agreeing to the terms, but no joint + document was drawn until October 16 (1868).]—My percentage is to be + a fourth more than they have ever paid any author except Greeley. + Beecher will be surprised, I guess, when he hears this. + These publishers get off the most tremendous editions of their + books you can imagine. I shall write to the Enterprise and Alta + every week, as usual, I guess, and to the Herald twice a week, + occasionally to the Tribune and the magazines (I have a stupid + article in the Galaxy, just issued), but I am not going to write to + this and that and the other paper any more. + I have had a tiptop time here for a few days (guest of Mr. Jno. + Hooker's family—Beecher's relatives—in a general way of Mr. Bliss + also, who is head of the publishing firm). Puritans are mighty + straight-laced, and they won't let me smoke in the parlor, but the + Almighty don't make any better people. + I have to make a speech at the annual Herald dinner on the 6th of + May. + + So the book, which would establish his claim to a peerage in the + literary land, was arranged for, and it remained only to prepare + the manuscript, a task which he regarded as not difficult. He had + only to collate the Alta and Tribune letters, edit them, and + write such new matter as would be required for completeness. + + Returning to Washington, he plunged into work with his usual + terrific energy, preparing the copy—in the mean time writing + newspaper correspondence and sketches that would bring immediate + return. In addition to his regular contributions, he entered into + a syndicate arrangement with John Swinton (brother of William + Swinton, the historian) to supply letters to a list of + newspapers. + + “I have written seven long newspaper letters and a short magazine + article in less than two days,” he wrote home, and by the end of + January he had also prepared several chapters of his book. + + The San Francisco post-mastership was suggested to him again, but + he put the temptation behind him. He refers to this more than + once in his home letters, and it is clear that he wavered. + + Judge Field said if I wanted the place he could pledge me the + President's appointment, and Senator Corners said he would + guarantee me the Senate's confirmation. It was a great temptation, + but it would render it impossible to fill my book contract, and I + had to drop the idea.... + And besides I did not want the office. + + He made this final decision when he heard that the chief editor + of the Alta wanted the place, and he now threw his influence in + that quarter. “I would not take ten thousand dollars out of a + friend's pocket,” he said. + + But then suddenly came the news from Goodman that the Alta + publishers had copyrighted his Quaker City letters and proposed + getting them out in a book, to reimburse themselves still further + on their investment. This was sharper than a serpent's tooth. + Clemens got confirmation of the report by telegraph. By the same + medium he protested, but to no purpose. Then he wrote a letter + and sat down to wait. He reported his troubles to Orion: + + I have made a superb contract for a book, and have prepared the + first ten chapters of the sixty or eighty, but I will bet it never + sees the light. Don't you let the folks at home hear that. That + thieving Alta copyrighted the letters, and now shows no disposition + to let me use them. I have done all I can by telegraph, and now + await the final result by mail. I only charged them for 50 letters + what (even in) greenbacks would amount to less than two thousand + dollars, intending to write a good deal for high-priced Eastern + papers, and now they want to publish my letters in book form + themselves to get back that pitiful sum. + + Orion was by this time back from Nevada, setting type in St. + Louis. He was full of schemes, as usual, and his brother counsels + him freely. Then he says: + + We chase phantoms half the days of our lives. It is well if we + learn wisdom even then, and save the other half. + I am in for it. I must go on chasing them, until I marry, then I am + done with literature and all other bosh—that is, literature + wherewith to please the general public. + I shall write to please myself then. + + He closes by saying that he rather expects to go with Anson + Burlingame on the Chinese embassy. Clearly he was pretty hopeless + as to his book prospects. + + His first meeting with General Grant occurred just at this time. + In one of his home letters he mentions, rather airily, that he + will drop in someday on the General for an interview; and at + last, through Mrs. Grant, an appointment was made for a Sunday + evening when the General would be at home. He was elated with the + prospect of an interview; but when he looked into the + imperturbable, square, smileless face of the soldier he found + himself, for the first time in his life, without anything + particular to say. Grant nodded slightly and waited. His caller + wished something would happen. It did. His inspiration returned. + + “General,” he said, “I seem to be a little embarrassed. Are you?” + + That broke the ice. There were no further difficulties.—[Mark + Twain has variously related this incident. It is given here in + accordance with the letters of the period.] + + + + + LXVI. BACK TO SAN FRANCISCO + + + Reply came from the Alta, but it was not promising. It spoke + rather vaguely of prior arrangements and future possibilities. + Clemens gathered that under certain conditions he might share in + the profits of the venture. There was but one thing to do; he + knew those people—some of them—Colonel McComb and a Mr. + McCrellish intimately. He must confer with them in person. + + He was weary of Washington, anyway. The whole pitiful machinery + of politics disgusted him. In his notebook he wrote: + + Whiskey is taken into the committee rooms in demijohns and carried + out in demagogues. + + And in a letter: + + This is a place to get a poor opinion of everybody in. There are + some pitiful intellects in this Congress! There isn't one man in + Washington in civil office who has the brains of Anson Burlingame, + and I suppose if China had not seized and saved his great talents + to the world this government would have discarded him when his time + was up.—[Anson Burlingame had by this time become China's special + ambassador to the nations.] + + Furthermore, he was down on the climate of Washington. He decided + to go to San Francisco and see “those Alta thieves face to face.” + Then, if a book resulted, he could prepare it there among + friends. Also, he could lecture. + + He had been anxious to visit his people before sailing, but + matters were too urgent to permit delay. He obtained from Bliss + an advance of royalty and took passage, by way of Aspinwall, on + the sidewheel steamer Henry Chauncey, a fine vessel for those + days. The name of Mark Twain was already known on the isthmus, + and when it was learned he had arrived on the Chauncey a + delegation welcomed him on the wharf, and provided him with + refreshments and entertainment. Mr. Tracy Robinson, a poet, long + a resident of that southern land, was one of the group. Beyond + the isthmus Clemens fell in again with his old captain, Ned + Wakeman, who during the trip told him the amazing dream that in + due time would become Captain Stormfield's Visit to Heaven. He + made the first draft of this story soon after his arrival in San + Francisco, as a sort of travesty of Elizabeth Stuart Phelps's + Gates Ajar, then very popular. Clemens, then and later, had a + high opinion of Capt. Ned Wakeman's dream, but his story of it + would pass through several stages before finally reaching the + light of publication.—[Mr. John P. Vollmer, now of Lewiston, + Idaho, a companion of that voyage, writes of a card game which + took place beyond the isthmus. The notorious crippled gambler, + “Smithy,” figured in it, and it would seem to have furnished the + inspiration for the exciting story in Chapter XXXVI of the + Mississippi book.] + + In San Francisco matters turned out as he had hoped. Colonel + McComb was his stanch friend; McCrellish and Woodward, the + proprietors, presently conceded that they had already received + good value for the money paid. The author agreed to make proper + acknowledgments to the Alta in his preface, and the matter was + settled with friendliness all around. + + The way was now clear, the book assured. First, however, he must + provide himself with funds. He delivered a lecture, with the + Quaker City excursion as his subject. On the 5th of May he wrote + to Bliss: + + I lectured here on the trip the other night; over $1,600 in gold + in the house; every seat taken and paid for before night. + + He reports that he is steadily at work, and expects to start East + with the completed manuscript about the middle of June. + + But this was a miscalculation. Clemens found that the letters + needed more preparation than he had thought. His literary vision + and equipment had vastly altered since the beginning of that + correspondence. Some of the chapters he rewrote; others he + eliminated entirely. It required two months of fairly steady work + to put the big manuscript together. + + Some of the new chapters he gave to Bret Harte for the Overland + Monthly, then recently established. Harte himself was becoming a + celebrity about this time. His “Luck of Roaring Camp” and “The + Outcasts of Poker Flat,” published in early numbers of the + Overland, were making a great stir in the East, arousing there a + good deal more enthusiasm than in the magazine office or the city + of their publication. That these two friends, each supreme in his + own field, should have entered into their heritage so nearly at + the same moment, is one of the many seemingly curious + coincidences of literary history. + + Clemens now concluded to cover his lecture circuit of two years + before. He was assured that it would be throwing away a precious + opportunity not to give his new lecture to his old friends. The + result justified that opinion. At Virginia, at Carson, and + elsewhere he was received like a returned conqueror. He might + have been accorded a Roman triumph had there been time and + paraphernalia. Even the robbers had reformed, and entire safety + was guaranteed him on the Divide between Virginia and Gold Hill. + At Carson he called on Mrs. Curry, as in the old days, and among + other things told her how snow from the Lebanon Mountains is + brought to Damascus on the backs of camels. + + “Sam,” she said, “that's just one of your yarns, and if you tell + it in your lecture to-night I'll get right up and say so.” + + But he did tell it, for it was a fact; and though Mrs. Curry did + not rise to deny it she shook her finger at him in a way he knew. + + He returned to San Francisco and gave one more lecture, the last + he would ever give in California. His preparatory advertising for + that occasion was wholly unique, characteristic of him to the + last degree. It assumed the form of a handbill of protest, + supposed to have been issued by the foremost citizens of San + Francisco, urging him to return to the States without inflicting + himself further upon them. As signatures he made free with the + names of prominent individuals, followed by those of + organizations, institutions, “Various Benevolent Societies, + Citizens on Foot and Horseback, and fifteen hundred in the + Steerage.” + + Following this (on the same bill) was his reply, “To the fifteen + hundred and others,” in which he insisted on another hearing: + + I will torment the people if I want to.... It only costs the people + $1 apiece, and if they can't stand it what do they stay here + for?... My last lecture was not as fine as I thought it was, but I + have submitted this discourse to several able critics, and they + have pronounced it good. Now, therefore, why should I withhold it? + + He promised positively to sail on the 6th of July if they would + let him talk just this once. Continuing, the handbill presented a + second protest, signed by the various clubs and business firms; + also others bearing variously the signatures of the newspapers, + and the clergy, ending with the brief word: + + You had better go. Yours, CHIEF OF POLICE. + + All of which drollery concluded with his announcement of place + and date of his lecture, with still further gaiety at the end. + Nothing short of a seismic cataclysm—an earthquake, in fact—could + deter a San Francisco audience after that. Mark Twain's farewell + address, given at the Mercantile Library July 2 (1868), doubtless + remains today the leading literary event in San Francisco's + history.—[Copy of the lecture announcement, complete, will be + found in Appendix H, at the end of last volume.] + + He sailed July 6th by the Pacific mail steamer Montana to + Acapulco, caught the Henry Chauncey at Aspinwall, reached New + York on the 28th, and a day or two later had delivered his + manuscript at Hartford. + + But a further difficulty had arisen. Bliss was having troubles + himself, this time, with his directors. Many reports of Mark + Twain's new book had been traveling the rounds of the press, some + of which declared it was to be irreverent, even blasphemous, in + tone. The title selected, The New Pilgrim's Progress, was in + itself a sacrilege. Hartford was a conservative place; the + American Publishing Company directors were of orthodox + persuasion. They urged Bliss to relieve the company of this + impending disaster of heresy. When the author arrived one or more + of them labored with him in person, without avail. As for Bliss, + he was stanch; he believed in the book thoroughly, from every + standpoint. He declared if the company refused to print it he + would resign the management and publish the book himself. This + was an alarming suggestion to the stockholders. Bliss had + returned dividends—a boon altogether too rare in the company's + former history. The objectors retired and were heard of no more. + The manuscript was placed in the hands of Fay and Cox, + illustrators, with an order for about two hundred and fifty + pictures. + + Fay and Cox turned it over to True Williams, one of the + well-known illustrators of that day. Williams was a man of great + talent—of fine imagination and sweetness of spirit—but it was + necessary to lock him in a room when industry was required, with + nothing more exciting than cold water as a beverage. Clemens + himself aided in the illustrating by obtaining of Moses S. Beach + photographs from the large collection he had brought home. + + + + + LXVII. A VISIT TO ELMIRA + + + Meantime he had skilfully obtained a renewal of the invitation to + spend a week in the Langdon home. + + He meant to go by a fast train, but, with his natural gift for + misunderstanding time-tables, of course took a slow one, + telegraphing his approach from different stations along the road. + Young Langdon concluded to go down the line as far as Waverly to + meet him. When the New York train reached there the young man + found his guest in the smoking-car, travel-stained and + distressingly clad. Mark Twain was always scrupulously neat and + correct of dress in later years, but in that earlier day neatness + and style had not become habitual and did not give him comfort. + Langdon greeted him warmly but with doubt. Finally he summoned + courage to say, hesitatingly—“You've got some other clothes, + haven't you?” + + The arriving guest was not in the least disturbed. + + “Oh yes,” he said with enthusiasm, “I've got a fine brand-new + outfit in this bag, all but a hat. It will be late when we get + in, and I won't see any one to-night. You won't know me in the + morning. We'll go out early and get a hat.” + + This was a large relief to the younger man, and the rest of the + journey was happy enough. True to promise, the guest appeared at + daylight correctly, even elegantly clad, and an early trip to the + shops secured the hat. A gay and happy week followed—a week + during which Samuel Clemens realized more fully than ever that in + his heart there was room for only one woman in all the world: + Olivia Langdon—“Livy,” as they all called her—and as the day of + departure drew near it may be that the gentle girl had made some + discoveries, too. + + No word had passed between them. Samuel Clemens had the + old-fashioned Southern respect for courtship conventions, and for + what, in that day at least, was regarded as honor. On the morning + of the final day he said to young Langdon: + + “Charley, my week is up, and I must go home.” + + The young man expressed a regret which was genuine enough, though + not wholly unqualified. His older sister, Mrs. Crane, leaving + just then for a trip to the White Mountains, had said: + + “Charley, I am sure Mr. Clemens is after our Livy. You mustn't + let him carry her off before our return.” + + The idea was a disturbing one. The young man did not urge his + guest to prolong his-visit. He said: + + “We'll have to stand it, I guess, but you mustn't leave before + to-night.” + + “I ought to go by the first train,” Clemens said, gloomily. “I am + in love.” + + “In what!” + + “In love-with your sister, and I ought to get away from here.” + + The young man was now very genuinely alarmed. To him Mark Twain + was a highly gifted, fearless, robust man—a man's man—and as such + altogether admirable—lovable. But Olivia—Livy—she was to him + little short of a saint. No man was good enough for her, + certainly not this adventurous soldier of letters from the West. + Delightful he was beyond doubt, adorable as a companion, but not + a companion for Livy. + + “Look here, Clemens,” he said, when he could get his voice. + “There's a train in half an hour. I'll help you catch it. Don't + wait till to-night. Go now.” + + Clemens shook his head. + + “No, Charley,” he said, in his gentle drawl, “I want to enjoy + your hospitality a little longer. I promise to be circumspect, + and I'll go to-night.” + + That night, after dinner, when it was time to take the New York + train, a light two-seated wagon was at the gate. The coachman was + in front, and young Langdon and his guest took the back seat. For + some reason the seat had not been locked in its place, and when, + after the good-bys, the coachman touched the horse it made a + quick spring forward, and the back seat, with both passengers, + described a half-circle and came down with force on the cobbled + street. Neither passenger was seriously hurt; Clemens not at + all—only dazed a little for a moment. Then came an inspiration; + here was a chance to prolong his visit. Evidently it was not + intended that he should take that train. When the Langdon + household gathered around with restoratives he did not recover + too quickly. He allowed them to support or carry him into the + house and place him in an arm-chair and apply remedies. The young + daughter of the house especially showed anxiety and attention. + This was pure happiness. He was perjuring himself, of course, but + they say Jove laughs at such things. + + He recovered in a day or two, but the wide hospitality of the + handsome Langdon home was not only offered now; it was enforced. + He was still there two weeks later, after which he made a trip to + Cleveland to confide in Mrs. Fairbanks how he intended to win + Livy Langdon for his wife. + + + + + LXVIII. THE REV. “JOE” TWICHELL. + + + He returned to Hartford to look after the progress of his book. + Some of it was being put into type, and with his mechanical + knowledge of such things he was naturally interested in the + process. + + He made his headquarters with the Blisses, then living at 821 + Asylum Avenue, and read proof in a little upper room, where the + lamp was likely to be burning most of the time, where the + atmosphere was nearly always blue with smoke, and the window-sill + full of cigar butts. Mrs. Bliss took him into the quiet social + life of the neighborhood—to small church receptions, society + gatherings and the like—all of which he seemed to enjoy. Most of + the dwellers in that neighborhood were members of the Asylum Hill + Congregational Church, then recently completed; all but the + spire. It was a cultured circle, well-off in the world's goods, + its male members, for the most part, concerned in various + commercial ventures. + + The church stood almost across the way from the Bliss home, and + Mark Twain, with his picturesque phrasing, referred to it as the + “stub-tailed church,” on account of its abbreviated spire; also, + later, with a knowledge of its prosperous membership, as the + “Church of the Holy Speculators.” He was at an evening reception + in the home of one of its members when he noticed a photograph of + the unfinished building framed and hanging on the wall. + + “Why, yes,” he commented, in his slow fashion, “this is the + 'Church of the Holy Speculators.'” + + “Sh,” cautioned Mrs. Bliss. “Its pastor is just behind you. He + knows your work and wants to meet you.” Turning, she said: “Mr. + Twichell, this is Mr. Clemens. Most people know him as Mark + Twain.” + + And so, in this casual fashion, he met the man who was presently + to become his closest personal friend and counselor, and would + remain so for more than forty years. + + Joseph Hopkins Twichell was a man about his own age, athletic and + handsome, a student and a devout Christian, yet a man familiar + with the world, fond of sports, with an exuberant sense of humor + and a wide understanding of the frailties of humankind. He had + been “port waist oar” at Yale, and had left college to serve with + General “Dan” Sickles as a chaplain who had followed his duties + not only in the camp, but on the field. + + Mention has already been made of Mark Twain's natural leaning + toward ministers of the gospel, and the explanation of it is + easier to realize than to convey. He was hopelessly + unorthodox—rankly rebellious as to creeds. Anything resembling + cant or the curtailment of mental liberty roused only his + resentment and irony. Yet something in his heart always warmed + toward any laborer in the vineyard, and if we could put the + explanation into a single sentence, perhaps we might say it was + because he could meet them on that wide, common ground sympathy + with mankind. Mark Twain's creed, then and always, may be put + into three words, “liberty, justice, humanity.” It may be put + into one word, “humanity.” + + Ministers always loved Mark Twain. They did not always approve of + him, but they adored him: The Rev. Mr. Rising, of the Comstock, + was an early example of his ministerial friendships, and we have + seen that Henry Ward Beecher cultivated his company. In a San + Francisco letter of two years before, Mark Twain wrote his + mother, thinking it would please her: + + I am as thick as thieves with the Reverend Stebbins. I am laying + for the Reverend Scudder and the Reverend Doctor Stone. I am + running on preachers now altogether, and I find them gay. + + So it may be that his first impulse toward Joseph Twichell was + due to the fact that he was a young member of that army whose + mission is to comfort and uplift mankind. But it was only a + little time till the impulse had grown into a friendship that + went beyond any profession or doctrine, a friendship that ripened + into a permanent admiration and love for “Joe” Twichell himself, + as one of the noblest specimens of his race. + + He was invited to the Twichell home, where he met the young wife + and got a glimpse of the happiness of that sweet and peaceful + household. He had a neglected, lonely look, and he loved to + gather with them at their fireside. He expressed his envy of + their happiness, and Mrs. Twichell asked him why, since his + affairs were growing prosperous, he did not establish a household + of his own. Long afterward Mr. Twichell wrote: + + Mark made no answer for a little, but, with his eyes bent on the + floor, appeared to be deeply pondering. Then he looked up, and said + slowly, in a voice tremulous with earnestness (with what sympathy + he was heard may be imagined): “I am taking thought of it. I am in + love beyond all telling with the dearest and best girl in the whole + world. I don't suppose she will marry me. I can't think it + possible. She ought not to. But if she doesn't I shall be sure that + the best thing I ever did was to fall in love with her, and proud + to have it known that I tried to win her!” + + It was only a brief time until the Twichell fireside was home to + him. He came and went, and presently it was “Mark” and “Joe,” as + by and by it would be “Livy” and “Harmony,” and in a few years + “Uncle Joe” and “Uncle Mark,” “Aunt Livy” and “Aunt Harmony,” and + so would remain until the end. + + + + + LXIX. A LECTURE TOUR + + + James Redpath, proprietor of the Boston Lyceum Bureau, was the + leading lecture agent of those days, and controlled all, or + nearly all, of the platform celebrities. Mark Twain's success at + the Cooper Union the year before had interested Redpath. He had + offered engagements then and later, but Clemens had not been free + for the regular circuit. Now there was no longer a reason for + postponement of a contract. Redpath was eager for the new + celebrity, and Clemens closed with him for the season of 1868-9. + With his new lecture, “The Vandal Abroad,” he was presently + earning a hundred dollars and more a night, and making most of + the nights count. + + This was affluence indeed. He had become suddenly a person of + substance-an associate of men of consequence, with a commensurate + income. He could help his mother lavishly now, and he did. + + His new lecture was immensely popular. It was a resume of the + 'Quaker City' letters—a foretaste of the book which would + presently follow. Wherever he went, he was hailed with eager + greetings. He caught such drifting exclamations as, “There he is! + There goes Mark Twain!” People came out on the street to see him + pass. That marvelous miracle which we variously call “notoriety,” + “popularity,” “fame,” had come to him. In his notebook he wrote, + “Fame is a vapor, popularity an accident; the only, earthly + certainty oblivion.” + + The newspapers were filled with enthusiasm both as to his matter + and method. His delivery was described as a “long, monotonous + drawl, with the fun invariably coming in at the end of a + sentence—after a pause.” His appearance at this time is thus set + down: + + Mark Twain is a man of medium height, about five feet ten, sparsely + built, with dark reddish-brown hair and mustache. His features are + fair, his eyes keen and twinkling. He dresses in scrupulous evening + attire. In lecturing he hangs about the desk, leaning on it or + flirting around the corners of it, then marching and + countermarching in the rear of it. He seldom casts a glance at his + manuscript. + + No doubt this fairly presents Mark Twain, the lecturer of that + day. It was a new figure on the platform, a man with a new + method. As to his manuscript, the item might have said that he + never consulted it at all. He learned his lecture; what he + consulted was merely a series of hieroglyphics, a set of crude + pictures drawn by himself, suggestive of the subject-matter + underneath new head. Certain columns represented the Parthenon; + the Sphinx meant Egypt, and so on. His manuscript lay there in + case of accident, but the accident did not happen. + + A number of his engagements were in the central part of New York, + at points not far distant from Elmira. He had a standing + invitation to visit the Langdon home, and he made it convenient + to avail himself of that happiness. + + His was not an unruffled courtship. When at last he reached the + point of proposing for the daughter of the house, neither the + daughter nor the household offered any noticeable encouragement + to his suit. Many absurd anecdotes have been told of his first + interview with Mr. Langdon on the subject, but they are + altogether without foundation. It was a proper and dignified + discussion of a very serious matter. Mr. Langdon expressed deep + regard for him and friendship but he was not inclined to add him + to the family; the young lady herself, in a general way, accorded + with these views. The applicant for favor left sadly enough, but + he could not remain discouraged or sad. He lectured at Cleveland + with vast success, and the news of it traveled quickly to Elmira. + He was referred to by Cleveland papers as a “lion” and “the + coming man of the age.” Two days later, in Pittsburgh (November + 19th), he “played” against Fanny Kemble, the favorite actress of + that time, with the result that Miss Kemble had an audience of + two hundred against nearly ten times the number who gathered to + hear Mark Twain. The news of this went to Elmira, too. It was in + the papers there next morning; surely this was a conquering + hero—a gay Lochinvar from out of the West—and the daughter of the + house must be guarded closely, that he did not bear her away. It + was on the second morning following the Pittsburgh triumph, when + the Langdon family were gathered at breakfast, that a bushy + auburn head poked fearfully in at the door, and a low, humble + voice said: + + “The calf has returned; may the prodigal have some breakfast?” + + No one could be reserved or reprovingly distant, or any of those + unfriendly things with a person like that; certainly not Jervis + Langdon, who delighted in the humor and the tricks and turns and + oddities of this eccentric visitor. Giving his daughter to him + was another matter, but even that thought was less disturbing + than it had been at the start. In truth, the Langdon household + had somehow grown to feel that he belonged to them. The elder + sister's husband, Theodore Crane, endorsed him fully. He had long + before read some of the Mark Twain sketches that had traveled + eastward in advance of their author, and had recognized, even in + the crudest of them, a classic charm. As for Olivia Langdon's + mother and sister, their happiness lay in hers. Where her heart + went theirs went also, and it would appear that her heart, in + spite of herself, had found its rightful keeper. Only young + Langdon was irreconciled, and eventually set out for a voyage + around the world to escape the situation. + + There was only a provisional engagement at first. Jervis Langdon + suggested, and Samuel Clemens agreed with him, that it was proper + to know something of his past, as well as of his present, before + the official parental sanction should be given. When Mr. Langdon + inquired as to the names of persons of standing to whom he might + write for credentials, Clemens pretty confidently gave him the + name of the Reverend Stebbins and others of San Francisco, adding + that he might write also to Joe Goodman if he wanted to, but that + he had lied for Goodman a hundred times and Goodman would lie for + him if necessary, so his testimony would be of no value. The + letters to the clergy were written, and Mr. Langdon also wrote + one on his own account. + + It was a long mail-trip to the Coast and back in those days. It + might be two months before replies would come from those + ministers. The lecturer set out again on his travels, and was + radiantly and happily busy. He went as far west as Illinois, had + crowded houses in Chicago, visited friends and kindred in + Hannibal, St. Louis, and Keokuk, carrying the great news, and + lecturing in old familiar haunts. + + + + + LXX. INNOCENTS AT HOME—AND “THE INNOCENTS ABROAD” + + + He was in Jacksonville, Illinois, at the end of January (1869), + and in a letter to Bliss states that he will be in Elmira two + days later, and asks that proofs of the book be sent there. He + arrived at the Langdon home, anxious to hear the reports that + would make him, as the novels might say, “the happiest or the + most miserable of men.” Jervis Langdon had a rather solemn look + when they were alone together. Clemens asked: + + “You've heard from those gentlemen out there?” + + “Yes, and from another gentleman I wrote concerning you.” + + “They don't appear to have been very enthusiastic, from your + manner.” + + “Well, yes, some of them were.” + + “I suppose I may ask what particular form their emotion took?” + + “Oh yes, yes; they agree unanimously that you are a brilliant, + able man, a man with a future, and that you would make about the + worst husband on record.” + + The applicant for favor had a forlorn look. + + “There's nothing very evasive about that,” he said: + + There was a period of reflective silence. It was probably no more + than a few seconds, but it seemed longer. + + “Haven't you any other friend that you could suggest?” Langdon + said. + + “Apparently none whose testimony would be valuable.” + + Jervis Langdon held out his hand. “You have at least one,” he + said. “I believe in you. I know you better than they do.” + + And so came the crown of happiness. The engagement of Samuel + Langhorne Clemens and Olivia Lewis Langdon was ratified next day, + February 4, 1869. + + But if the friends of Mark Twain viewed the idea of the marriage + with scant favor, the friends of Miss Langdon regarded it with + genuine alarm. Elmira was a conservative place—a place of + pedigree and family tradition; that a stranger, a former printer, + pilot, miner, wandering journalist and lecturer, was to carry off + the daughter of one of the oldest and wealthiest families, was a + thing not to be lightly permitted. The fact that he had achieved + a national fame did not count against other considerations. The + social protest amounted almost to insurrection, but it was not + availing. The Langdon family had their doubts too, though of a + different sort. Their doubts lay in the fear that one, reared as + their daughter had been, might be unable to hold a place as the + wife of this intellectual giant, whom they felt that the world + was preparing to honor. That this delicate, sheltered girl could + have the strength of mind and body for her position seemed hard + to believe. Their faith overbore such questionings, and the + future years proved how fully it was justified. + + To his mother Samuel Clemens wrote: + + She is only a little body, but she hasn't her peer in Christendom. + I gave her only a plain gold engagement ring, when fashion + imperatively demands a two-hundred-dollar diamond one, and told her + it was typical of her future life-namely, that she would have to + flourish on substance, rather than luxuries (but you see I know the + girl—she don't care anything about luxuries).... She spends no + money but her astral year's allowance, and spends nearly every cent + of that on other people. She will be a good, sensible little wife, + without any airs about her. I don't make intercession for her + beforehand, and ask you to love her, for there isn't any use in + that—you couldn't help it if you were to try. I warn you that + whoever comes within the fatal influence of her beautiful nature is + her willing slave forevermore. + + To Mrs. Crane, absent in March, her father wrote: + + DEAR SUE,—I received your letter yesterday with a great deal of + pleasure, but the letter has gone in pursuit of one S. L. Clemens, + who has been giving us a great deal of trouble lately. We cannot + have a joy in our family without a feeling, on the part of the + little incorrigible in our family, that this wanderer must share + it, so, as soon as read, into her pocket and off upstairs goes your + letter, and in the next two minutes into the mail, so it is + impossible for me now to refer to it, or by reading it over gain an + inspiration in writing you... + + Clemens closed his lecture tour in March, acid went immediately + to Elmira. He had lectured between fifty and sixty times, with a + return of something more than $8,000, not a bad aggregate for a + first season on the circuit. He had planned to make a spring tour + to California, but the attraction at Elmira was of a sort that + discouraged distant travel. Furthermore, he disliked the + platform, then and always. It was always a temptation to him + because of its quick and abundant return, but it was none the + less distasteful. In a letter of that spring he wrote: + + I most cordially hate the lecture field. And after all, I shudder + to think I may never get out of it. In all conversation with Gough, + and Anna Dickinson, Nasby, Oliver Wendell Holmes, Wendell Phillips, + and the other old stagers, I could not observe that they ever + expected or hoped to get out of the business. I don't want to get + wedded to it as they are. + + He declined further engagements on the excuse that he must attend + to getting out his book. The revised proofs were coming now, and + he and gentle Livy Langdon read them together. He realized + presently that with her sensitive nature she had also a keen + literary perception. What he lacked in delicacy—and his lack was + likely to be large enough in that direction—she detected, and + together they pruned it away. She became his editor during those + happy courtship days—a position which she held to her death. The + world owed a large debt of gratitude to Mark Twain's wife, who + from the very beginning—and always, so far as in her strength she + was able—inspired him to give only his worthiest to the world, + whether in written or spoken word, in counsel or in deed. Those + early days of their close companionship, spiritual and mental, + were full of revelation to Samuel Clemens, a revelation that + continued from day to day, and from year to year, even to the + very end. + + The letter to Bliss and the proofs were full of suggested changes + that would refine and beautify the text. In one of them he + settles the question of title, which he says is to be: + + THE INNOCENTS ABROAD or THE NEW PILGRIM'S PROGRESS + + and we may be sure that it was Olivia Langdon's voice that gave + the deciding vote for the newly adopted chief title, which would + take any suggestion of irreverence out of the remaining words. + + The book was to have been issued in the spring, but during his + wanderings proofs had been delayed, and there was now + considerable anxiety about it, as the agencies had become + impatient for the canvass. At the end of April Clemens wrote: + “Your printers are doing well. I will hurry the proofs”; but it + was not until the early part of June that the last chapters were + revised and returned. Then the big book, at last completed, went + to press on an edition of twenty thousand, a large number for any + new book, even to-day. + + In later years, through some confusion of circumstance, Mark + Twain was led to believe that the publication of The Innocents + Abroad was long and unnecessarily delayed. But this was + manifestly a mistake. The book went to press in June. It was a + big book and a large edition. The first copy was delivered July + 20 (1869), and four hundred and seventeen bound volumes were + shipped that month. Even with the quicker mechanical processes of + to-day a month or more is allowed for a large book between the + final return of proofs and the date of publication. So it is only + another instance of his remembering, as he once quaintly put it, + “the thing that didn't happen.”—[In an article in the North + American Review (September 21, 1906) Mr. Clemens stated that he + found it necessary to telegraph notice that he would bring suit + if the book was not immediately issued. In none of the letters + covering this period is there any suggestion of delay on the part + of the publishers, and the date of the final return of proofs, + together with the date of publication, preclude the possibility + of such a circumstance. At some period of his life he doubtless + sent, or contemplated sending, such a message, and this fact, + through some curious psychology, became confused in his mind with + the first edition of The Innocents Abroad.] + + + + + LXXI. THE GREAT BOOK OF TRAVEL. + + + 'The Innocents Abroad' was a success from the start. The + machinery for its sale and delivery was in full swing by August + 1, and five thousand one hundred and seventy copies were disposed + of that month—a number that had increased to more than thirty-one + thousand by the first of the year. It was a book of travel; its + lowest price was three and a half dollars. No such record had + been made by a book of that description; none has equaled it + since.—[One must recall that this was the record only up to 1910. + D.W.] + + If Mark Twain was not already famous, he was unquestionably + famous now. As the author of The New Pilgrim's Progress he was + swept into the domain of letters as one riding at the head of a + cavalcade—doors and windows wide with welcome and jubilant with + applause. Newspapers chorused their enthusiasm; the public voiced + universal approval; only a few of the more cultured critics + seemed hesitant and doubtful. + + They applauded—most of them—but with reservation. Doctor Holland + regarded Mark Twain as a mere fun maker of ephemeral popularity, + and was not altogether pleasant in his dictum. Doctor Holmes, in + a letter to the author, speaks of the “frequently quaint and + amusing conceits,” but does not find it in his heart to refer to + the book as literature. It was naturally difficult for the East + to concede a serious value to one who approached his subject with + such militant aboriginality, and occasionally wrote “those kind.” + William Dean Howells reviewed the book in the Atlantic, which was + of itself a distinction, whether the review was favorable or + otherwise. It was favorable on the whole, favorable to the humor + of the book, its “delicious impudence,” the charm of its + good-natured irony. The review closed: + + It is no business of ours to fix his rank among the humorists + California has given us, but we think he is, in an entirely + different way from all the others, quite worthy of the company of + the best. + + This is praise, but not of an intemperate sort, nor very + inclusive. The descriptive, the poetic, the more pretentious + phases of the book did not receive attention. Mr. Howells was + perhaps the first critic of eminence to recognize in Mark Twain + not only the humorist, but the supreme genius-the “Lincoln of our + literature.” This was later. The public—the silent public—with + what Howells calls “the inspired knowledge of the simple-hearted + multitude,” reached a similar verdict forthwith. And on + sufficient evidence: let the average unprejudiced person of + to-day take up the old volume and read a few chapters anywhere + and decide whether it is the work of a mere humorist, or also of + a philosopher, a poet, and a seer. The writer well remembers a + little group of “the simple-hearted multitude” who during the + winter of '69 and '70 gathered each evening to hear the Innocents + read aloud, and their unanimous verdict that it was the “best + book of modern times.” + + It was the most daring book of its day. Passages of it were + calculated to take the breath of the orthodox reader; only, + somehow, it made him smile, too. It was all so good-natured, so + openly sincere. Without doubt it preached heresy—the heresy of + viewing revered landmarks and relics joyously, rather than + lugubriously; reverentially, when they inspired reverence; + satirically, when they invited ridicule, and with kindliness + always. + + The Innocents Abroad is Mark Twain's greatest book of travel. The + critical and the pure in speech may object to this verdict. + Brander Matthews regards it second to A Tramp Abroad, the natural + viewpoint of the literary technician. The 'Tramp' contains better + usage without doubt, but it lacks the “color” which gives the + Innocents its perennial charm. In the Innocents there is a glow, + a fragrance, a romance of touch, a subtle something which is + idyllic, something which is not quite of reality, in the tale of + that little company that so long ago sailed away to the harbors + of their illusions beyond the sea, and, wandered together through + old palaces and galleries, and among the tombs of the saints, and + down through ancient lands. There is an atmosphere about it all, + a dream-like quality that lies somewhere in the telling, maybe, + or in the tale; at all events it is there, and the world has felt + it ever since. Perhaps it could be defined in a single word, + perhaps that word would be “youth.” That the artist, poor True + Williams, felt its inspiration is certain. We may believe that + Williams was not a great draftsman, but no artist ever caught + more perfectly the light and spirit of the author's text. Crude + some of the pictures are, no doubt, but they convey the very + essence of the story; they belong to it, they are a part of it, + and they ought never to perish. 'A Tramp Abroad' is a rare book, + but it cannot rank with its great predecessor in human charm. The + public, which in the long run makes mistakes, has rendered that + verdict. The Innocents by far outsells the Tramp, and, for that + matter, any other book of travel. + + + + + LXXII.THE PURCHASE OF A PAPER. + + + It is curious to reflect that Mark Twain still did not regard + himself as a literary man. He had no literary plans for the + future; he scarcely looked forward to the publication of another + book. He considered himself a journalist; his ambition lay in the + direction of retirement in some prosperous newspaper enterprise, + with the comforts and companionship of a home. During his travels + he had already been casting about for a congenial and substantial + association in newspaperdom, and had at one time considered the + purchase of an interest in the Cleveland Herald. But Buffalo was + nearer Elmira, and when an opportunity offered, by which he could + acquire a third interest in the Buffalo Express for $25,000, the + purchase was decided upon. His lack of funds prompted a new plan + for a lecture tour to the Pacific coast, this time with D. R. + Locke (Nasby), then immensely popular, in his lecture “Cussed Be + Canaan.” + + Clemens had met Nasby on the circuit, and was very fond of him. + The two had visited Boston together, and while there had called + on Doctor Holmes; this by the way. Nasby was fond of Clemens too, + but doubtful about the trip-doubtful about his lecture: + + Your proposition takes my breath away. If I had my new lecture + completed I wouldn't hesitate a moment, but really isn't “Cussed Be + Canaan” too old? You know that lemon, our African brother, juicy as + he was in his day, has been squeezed dry. Why howl about his wrongs + after said wrongs have been redressed? Why screech about the + “damnable spirit of Cahst” when the victim thereof sits at the + first table, and his oppressor mildly takes, in hash, what he + leaves? You see, friend Twain, the Fifteenth Amendment busted + “Cussed Be Canaan.” I howled feelingly on the subject while it was + a living issue, for I felt all that I said and a great deal more; + but now that we have won our fight why dance frantically on the + dead corpse of our enemy? The Reliable Contraband is contraband no + more, but a citizen of the United States, and I speak of him no + more. + Give me a week to think of your proposition. If I can jerk a + lecture in time I will go with you. The Lord knows I would like to. + —[Nasby's lecture, “Cussed Be Canaan,” opened, “We are all + descended from grandfathers!” He had a powerful voice, and always + just on the stroke of eight he rose and vigorously delivered this + sentence. Once, after lecturing an entire season—two hundred and + twenty-five nights—he went home to rest. That evening he sat, + musingly drowsing by the fire, when the clock struck eight. Without + a moment's thought Nasby sprang to his feet and thundered out, “We + are all descended from grandfathers!”] + + Nasby did not go, and Clemens's enthusiasm cooled at the prospect + of setting out alone on that long tour. Furthermore, Jervis + Langdon promptly insisted on advancing the money required to + complete the purchase of the Express, and the trade was + closed.—[Mr. Langdon is just as good for $25,000 for me, and has + already advanced half of it in cash. I wrote and asked whether I + had better send him my note, or a due bill, or how he would + prefer to have the indebtedness made of record, and he answered + every other topic in the letter pleasantly, but never replied to + that at all. Still, I shall give my note into a hands of his + business agent here, and pay him the interest as it falls due.—S. + L. C. to his mother.] + + The Buffalo Express was at this time in the hands of three + men—Col. George F. Selkirk, J. L. Lamed, and Thomas A. Kennett. + Colonel Selkirk was business manager, Lamed was political editor. + With the purchase of Kennett's share Clemens became a sort of + general and contributing editor, with a more or less “roving + commission”—his hours and duties not very clearly defined. It was + believed by his associates, and by Clemens himself, that his + known connection with the paper would give it prestige and + circulation, as Nasby's connection had popularized the Toledo + Blade. The new editor entered upon his duties August 14 (1869). + The members of the Buffalo press gave him a dinner that evening, + and after the manner of newspaper men the world over, were + handsomely cordial to the “new enemy in their midst.” + + There is an anecdote which relates that next morning, when Mark + Twain arrived in the Express office (it was then at 14 Swan + Street), there happened to be no one present who knew him. A + young man rose very bruskly and asked if there was any one he + would like to see. It is reported that he replied, with gentle + deliberation: + + “Well, yes, I should like to see some young man offer the new + editor a chair.” + + It is so like Mark Twain that we are inclined to accept it, + though it seems of doubtful circumstance. In any case it deserves + to be true. His “Salutatory” (August 18th) is sufficiently + genuine: + + Being a stranger, it would be immodest for me to suddenly and + violently assume the associate editorship of the Buffalo Express + without a single word of comfort or encouragement to the + unoffending patrons of the paper, who are about to be exposed to + constant attacks of my wisdom and learning. But the word shall be + as brief as possible. I only want to assure parties having a + friendly interest in the prosperity of the journal that I am not + going to hurt the paper deliberately and intentionally at any time. + I am not going to introduce any startling reforms, nor in any way + attempt to make trouble.... I shall not make use of slang and + vulgarity upon any occasion or under any circumstances, and shall + never use profanity except when discussing house rent and taxes. + Indeed, upon a second thought, I shall not use it even then, for it + is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading; though, to speak truly, I + do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth + a cent without it. I shall not often meddle with politics, because + we have a political Editor who is already excellent and only needs + to serve a term or two in the penitentiary to be perfect. I shall + not write any poetry unless I conceive a spite against the + subscribers. + Such is my platform. I do not see any use in it, but custom is law + and must be obeyed. + + John Harrison Mills, who was connected with the Express in those + days, has written: + + I cannot remember that there was any delay in getting down to his + work. I think within five minutes the new editor had assumed the + easy look of one entirely at home, pencil in hand and a clutch of + paper before him, with an air of preoccupation, as of one intent on + a task delayed. It was impossible to be conscious of the man + sitting there, and not feel his identity with all that he had + enjoyed, and the reminiscence of it he that seemed to radiate; for + the personality was so absolutely in accord with all the record of + himself and his work. I cannot say he seemed to be that vague thing + they call a type in race or blood, though the word, if used in his + case for temperament, would decidedly mean what they used to call + the “sanguine.” + I thought that, pictorially, the noble costume of the Albanian + would have well become him. Or he might have been a Goth, and worn + the horned bull-pate helmet of Alaric's warriors; or stood at the + prow of one of the swift craft of the Vikings. His eyes, which have + been variously described, were, it seemed to me, of an + indescribable depth of the bluish moss-agate, with a capacity of + pupil dilation that in certain lights had the effect of a deep + black.... + + Mr. Mills adds that in dress he was now “well groomed,” and that + consequently they were obliged to revise their notions as to the + careless negligee which gossip had reported.—[From unpublished + Reminiscences kindly lent to the author by Mr. Mills] + + + + + LXXIII. THE FIRST MEETING WITH HOWELLS + + + Clemens' first period of editorial work was a brief one, though + he made frequent contributions to the paper: sketches, squibs, + travel-notes, and experiences, usually humorous in character. His + wedding-day had been set for early in the year, and it was + necessary to accumulate a bank account for that occasion. Before + October he was out on the lecture circuit, billed now for the + first time for New England, nervous and apprehensive in + consequence, though with good hope. To Pamela he wrote (November + 9th): + + To-morrow night I appear for the first time before a Boston + audience—4,000 critics—and on the success of this matter depends + my future success in New England. But I am not distressed. Nasby + is in the same boat. Tonight decides the fate of his brand-new + lecture. He has just left my room—been reading his lecture to + me—was greatly depressed. I have convinced him that he has little + to fear. + + Whatever alarm Mark Twain may have felt was not warranted. His + success with the New England public was immediate and complete. + He made his headquarters in Boston, at Redpath's office, where + there was pretty sure to be a congenial company, of which he was + presently the center. + + It was during one of these Boston sojourns that he first met + William Dean Howells, his future friend and literary counselor. + Howells was assistant editor of the Atlantic at this time; James + T. Fields, its editor. Clemens had been gratified by the Atlantic + review, and had called to express his thanks for it. He sat + talking to Fields, when Howells entered the editorial rooms, and + on being presented to the author of the review, delivered his + appreciation in the form of a story, sufficiently appropriate, + but not qualified for the larger types.—[He said: “When I read + that review of yours, I felt like the woman who was so glad her + baby had come white.”] + + His manner, his humor, his quaint colloquial forms all delighted + Howells—more, in fact, than the opulent sealskin overcoat which + he affected at this period—a garment astonishing rather than + esthetic, as Mark Twain's clothes in those days of his first + regeneration were likely to be startling enough, we may believe; + in the conservative atmosphere of the Atlantic rooms. And + Howells—gentle, genial, sincere—filled with the early happiness + of his calling, won the heart of Mark Twain and never lost it, + and, what is still more notable, won his absolute and unvarying + confidence in all literary affairs. It was always Mark Twain's + habit to rely on somebody, and in matters pertaining to + literature and to literary people in general he laid his burden + on William Dean Howells from that day. Only a few weeks after + that first visit we find him telegraphing to Howells, asking him + to look after a Californian poet, then ill and friendless in + Brooklyn. Clemens states that he does not know the poet, but will + contribute fifty dollars if Howells will petition the steamboat + company for a pass; and no doubt Howells complied, and spent a + good deal more than fifty dollars' worth of time to get the poet + relieved and started; it would be like him. + + + + + LXXIV. THE WEDDING-DAY + + + The wedding was planned, at first, either for Christmas or + New-Year's Day; but as the lecture engagements continued into + January it was decided to wait until these were filled. February + 2d, a date near the anniversary of the engagement, was agreed + upon, also a quiet wedding with no “tour.” The young people would + go immediately to Buffalo, and take up a modest residence, in a + boardinghouse as comfortable, even as luxurious, as the husband's + financial situation justified. At least that was Samuel Clemens's + understanding of the matter. He felt that he was heavily in + debt—that his first duty was to relieve himself of that + obligation. + + There were other plans in Elmira, but in the daily and happy + letters he received there was no inkling of any new purpose. + + He wrote to J. D. F. Slee, of Buffalo, who was associated in + business with Mr. Langdon, and asked him to find a suitable + boarding-place, one that would be sufficiently refined for the + woman who was to be his wife, and sufficiently reasonable to + insure prosperity. In due time Slee replied that, while boarding + was a “miserable business anyhow,” he had been particularly + fortunate in securing a place on one of the most pleasant + streets—“the family a small one and choice spirits, with no + predilection for taking boarders, and consenting to the present + arrangement only because of the anticipated pleasure of your + company.” The price, Slee added, would be reasonable. As a matter + of fact a house on Delaware Avenue—still the fine residence + street of Buffalo—had been bought and furnished throughout as a + present to the bride and groom. It stands to-day practically + unchanged—brick and mansard without, Eastlake within, a type then + much in vogue—spacious and handsome for that period. It was + completely appointed. Diagrams of the rooms had been sent to + Elmira and Miss Langdon herself had selected the furnishings. + Everything was put in readiness, including linen, cutlery, and + utensils. Even the servants had been engaged and the pantry and + cellar had been stocked. + + It must have been hard for Olivia Langdon to keep this wonderful + surprise out of those daily letters. A surprise like that is + always watching a chance to slip out unawares, especially when + one is eagerly impatient to reveal it. + + However, the traveler remained completely in the dark. He may + have wondered vaguely at the lack of enthusiasm in the boarding + idea, and could he have been certain that the sales of the book + would continue, or that his newspaper venture would yield an + abundant harvest, he might have planned his domestic beginning on + a more elaborate scale. If only the Tennessee land would yield + the long-expected fortune now! But these were all incalculable + things. All that he could be sure of was the coming of his great + happiness, in whatever environment, and of the dragging weeks + between. + + At last the night of the final lecture came, and he was off for + Elmira with the smallest possible delay. Once there, the + intervening days did not matter. He could join in the busy + preparations; he could write exuberantly to his friends. To Laura + Hawkins, long since Laura Frazer he sent a playful line; to Jim + Gillis, still digging and washing on the slopes of the old + Tuolumne hills, he wrote a letter which eminently belongs here: + + Elmira, N. Y., January 26, 1870. + DEAR Jim,—I remember that old night just as well! And somewhere + among my relics I have your remembrance stored away. It makes my + heart ache yet to call to mind some of those days. Still it + shouldn't, for right in the depths of their poverty and their + pocket-hunting vagabondage lay the germ of my coming good fortune. + You remember the one gleam of jollity that shot across our dismal + sojourn in the rain and mud of Angel's Camp—I mean that day we sat + around the tavern stove and heard that chap tell about the frog and + how they filled him with shot. And you remember how we quoted from + the yarn and laughed over it out there on the hillside while you + and dear old Stoker panned and washed. I jotted the story down in + my note-book that day, and would have been glad to get ten or + fifteen dollars for it—I was just that blind. But then we were so + hard up. I published that story, and it became widely known in + America, India, China, England, and the reputation it made for me + has paid me thousands and thousands of dollars since. Four or five + months ago I bought into the Express (I have ordered it sent to you + as long as you live, and if the bookkeeper sends you any bills you + let me hear of it). I went heavily in debt—never could have dared + to do that, Jim, if we hadn't heard the jumping Frog story that + day. + And wouldn't I love to take old Stoker by the hand, and wouldn't I + love to see him in his great specialty, his wonderful rendition of + Rinalds in the “Burning Shame!” Where is Dick and what is he doing? + Give him my fervent love and warm old remembrances. + A week from to-day I shall be married-to a girl even better and + lovelier than the peerless “Chapparal Quails.” You can't come so + far, Jim, but still I cordially invite you to come anyhow, and I + invite Dick too. And if you two boys were to land here on that + pleasant occasion we would make you right royally welcome. Truly + your friend, SAML. L. CLEMENS. + P.S.—-California plums are good. Jim, particularly when they are + stewed. + + It had been only five years before—that day in Angel's Camp—but + how long ago and how far away it seemed to him now! So much had + happened since then, so much of which that was the beginning—so + little compared with the marvel of the years ahead, whose + threshold he was now about to cross, and not alone. + + A day or two before the wedding he was asked to lecture on the + night of February 2d. He replied that he was sorry to disappoint + the applicant, but that he could not lecture on the night of + February 2d, for the reason that he was going to marry a young + lady on that evening, and that he would rather marry that young + lady than deliver all the lectures in the world. + + And so came the wedding-day. It began pleasantly; the postman + brought a royalty check that morning of $4,000, the accumulation + of three months' sales, and the Rev. Joseph Twichell and Harmony, + his wife, came from Hartford—Twichell to join with the Rev. + Thomas K. Beecher in solemnizing the marriage. Pamela Moffett, a + widow now, with her daughter Annie, grown to a young lady, had + come all the way from St. Louis, and Mrs. Fairbanks from + Cleveland. + + Yet the guests were not numerous, not more than a hundred at + most, so it was a quiet wedding there in the Langdon parlors, + those dim, stately rooms that in the future would hold so much of + his history—so much of the story of life and death that made its + beginning there. + + The wedding-service was about seven o'clock, for Mr. Beecher had + a meeting at the church soon after that hour. Afterward followed + the wedding-supper and dancing, and the bride's father danced + with the bride. To the interested crowd awaiting him at the + church Mr. Beecher reported that the bride was very beautiful, + and had on the longest white gloves he had ever seen; he declared + they reached to her shoulders.—[Perhaps for a younger generation + it should be said that Thomas K. Beecher was a brother of Henry + Ward Beecher. He lived and died in Elmira, the almost worshiped + pastor of the Park Congregational Church. He was a noble, + unorthodox teacher. Samuel Clemens at the time of his marriage + already strongly admired him, and had espoused his cause in an + article signed “S'cat!” in the Elmira Advertiser, when he + (Beecher) had been assailed by the more orthodox Elmira clergy. + For the “S'cat” article see Appendix I, at the end of last + volume.] + + It was the next afternoon when they set out for Buffalo, + accompanied by the bride's parents, the groom's relatives, the + Beechers, and perhaps one or two others of that happy company. It + was nine o'clock at night when they arrived, and found Mr. Slee + waiting at the station with sleighs to convey the party to the + “boarding-house” he had selected. They drove and drove, and the + sleigh containing the bride and groom got behind and apparently + was bound nowhere in particular, which disturbed the groom a good + deal, for he thought it proper that they should arrive first, to + receive their guests. He commented on Slee's poor judgment in + selecting a house that was so hard to find, and when at length + they turned into fashionable Delaware Avenue, and stopped before + one of the most attractive places in the neighborhood, he was + beset with fear concerning the richness of the locality. + + They were on the steps when the doors opened, and a perfect + fairyland of lights and decoration was revealed within. The + friends who had gone ahead came out with greetings, to lead in + the bride and groom. Servants hurried forward to take bags and + wraps. They were ushered inside; they were led through beautiful + rooms, all newly appointed and garnished. The bridegroom was + dazed, unable to understand the meaning of things, the apparent + ownership and completeness of possession. + + At last the young wife put her hand upon his arm: + + “Don't you understand, Youth,” she said; that was always her name + for him. “Don't you understand? It is ours, all ours—everything—a + gift from father!” + + But even then he could not grasp it; not at first, not until Mr. + Langdon brought a little box and, opening it, handed them the + deeds. + + Nobody quite remembers what was the first remark that Samuel + Clemens made then; but either then or a little later he said: + + “Mr. Langdon, whenever you are in Buffalo, if it's twice a year, + come right here. Bring your bag and stay overnight if you want + to. It sha'n't cost you a cent!” + + They went in to supper then, and by and by the guests were gone + and the young wedded pair were alone. + + Patrick McAleer, the young coachman, who would grow old in their + employ, and Ellen, the cook, came in for their morning orders, + and were full of Irish delight at the inexperience and novelty of + it all. Then they were gone, and only the lovers in their new + house and their new happiness remained. + + And so it was they entered the enchanted land. + + + + + LXXV. AS TO DESTINY + + + If any reader has followed these chapters thus far, he may have + wondered, even if vaguely, at the seeming fatality of events. + Mark Twain had but to review his own life for justification of + his doctrine of inevitability—an unbroken and immutable sequence + of cause and effect from the beginning. Once he said: + + “When the first living atom found itself afloat on the great + Laurentian sea the first act of that first atom led to the second + act of that first atom, and so on down through the succeeding + ages of all life, until, if the steps could be traced, it would + be shown that the first act of that first atom has led inevitably + to the act of my standing here in my dressing-gown at this + instant talking to you.” + + It seemed the clearest presentment ever offered in the matter of + predestined circumstance—predestined from the instant when that + primal atom felt the vital thrill. Mark Twain's early life, + however imperfectly recorded, exemplifies this postulate. If + through the years still ahead of us the course of destiny seems + less clearly defined, it is only because thronging events make + the threads less easy to trace. The web becomes richer, the + pattern more intricate and confusing, but the line of fate + neither breaks nor falters, to the end. + + + + + LXXVI. ON THE BUFFALO “EXPRESS” + + + With the beginning of life in Buffalo, Mark Twain had become + already a world character—a man of large consequence and events. + He had no proper realization of this, no real sense of the size + of his conquest; he still regarded himself merely as a lecturer + and journalist, temporarily popular, but with no warrant to a + permanent seat in the world's literary congress. He thought his + success something of an accident. The fact that he was prepared + to settle down as an editorial contributor to a newspaper in what + was then only a big village is the best evidence of a modest + estimate of his talents. + + He “worked like a horse,” is the verdict of those who were + closely associated with him on the Express. His hours were not + regular, but they were long. Often he was at his desk at eight in + the morning, and remained there until ten or eleven at night. + + His working costume was suited to comfort rather than show. With + coat, vest, collar, and tie usually removed (sometimes even his + shoes), he lounged in his chair, in any attitude that afforded + the larger ease, pulling over the exchanges; scribbling + paragraphs, editorials, humorous skits, and what not, as the + notion came upon him. J. L. Lamed, his co-worker (he sat on the + opposite side of the same table), remembers that Mark Twain + enjoyed his work as he went along—the humor of it—and that he + frequently laughed as some whimsicality or new absurdity came + into his mind. + + “I doubt,” writes Lamed, “if he ever enjoyed anything more than + the jackknife engraving that he did on a piece of board of a + military map of the siege of Paris, which was printed in the + Express from his original plate, with accompanying explanations + and comments. His half-day of whittling and laughter that went + with it are something that I find pleasant to remember. Indeed, + my whole experience of association with him is a happy memory, + which I am fortunate in having.... What one saw of him was always + the actual Mark Twain, acting out of his own nature simply, + frankly, without pretense, and almost without reserve. It was + that simplicity and naturalness in the man which carried his + greatest charm.” + + Lamed, like many others, likens Mark Twain to Lincoln in various + of his characteristics. The two worked harmoniously together: + Lamed attending to the political direction of the journal, + Clemens to the literary, and what might be termed the sentimental + side. There was no friction in the division of labor, never + anything but good feeling between them. Clemens had a poor + opinion of his own comprehension of politics, and perhaps as + little regard for Lamed's conception of humor. Once when the + latter attempted something in the way of pleasantry his associate + said: + + “Better leave the humor on this paper to me, Lamed”; and once + when Lamed was away attending the Republican State Convention at + Saratoga, and some editorial comment seemed necessary, Clemens + thought it best to sign the utterance, and to make humor of his + shortcomings. + + I do not know much about politics, and am not sitting up nights to + learn.... + I am satisfied that these nominations are all right and sound, and + that they are the only ones that can bring peace to our distracted + country (the only political phrase I am perfectly familiar with and + competent to hurl at the public with fearless confidence—the other + editor is full of them), but being merely satisfied is not enough. + I always like to know before I shout. But I go for Mr. Curtis with + all my strength! Being certain of him, I hereby shout all I know + how. But the others may be a split ticket, or a scratched ticket, + or whatever you call it. + I will let it alone for the present. It will keep. The other young + man will be back to-morrow, and he will shout for it, split or no + split, rest assured of that. He will prance into this political + ring with his tomahawk and his war-whoop, and then you will hear a + crash and see the scalps fly. He has none of my diffidence. He + knows all about these nominees, and if he don't he will let on to + in such a natural way as to deceive the most critical. He knows + everything—he knows more than Webster's Unabridged and the American + Encyclopedia—but whether he knows anything about a subject or not + he is perfectly willing to discuss it. When he gets back he will + tell you all about these candidates as serenely as if he had been + acquainted with them a hundred years, though, speaking + confidentially, I doubt if he ever heard of any of them till + to-day. I am right well satisfied it is a good, sound, sensible + ticket, and a ticket to win; but wait till he comes. + In the mean time I go for George William Curtis and take the + chances. MARK TWAIN. + + He had become what Mr. Howells calls entirely “desouthernized” by + this time. From having been of slaveholding stock, and a + Confederate soldier, he had become a most positive Republican, a + rampant abolitionist—had there been anything left to abolish. His + sympathy had been always with the oppressed, and he had now + become their defender. His work on the paper revealed this more + and more. He wrote fewer sketches and more editorials, and the + editorials were likely to be either savage assaults upon some + human abuse, or fierce espousals of the weak. They were fearless, + scathing, terrific. Of some farmers of Cohocton, who had taken + the law into their own hands to punish a couple whom they + believed to be a detriment to the community, he wrote: + + “The men who did that deed are capable of doing any low, + sneaking, cowardly villainy that could be invented in perdition. + They are the very bastards of the devil.” + + He appended a full list of their names, and added: + + “If the farmers of Cohocton are of this complexion, what on earth + must a Cohocton rough be like?” + + But all this happened a long time ago, and we need not detail + those various old interests and labors here. It is enough to say + that Mark Twain on the Express was what he had been from the + beginning, and would be to the end—the zealous champion of + justice and liberty; violent and sometimes wrong in his + viewpoint, but never less than fearless and sincere. Invariably + he was for the oppressed. He had a natural instinct for the + right, but, right or wrong, he was for the under dog. + + Among the best of his editorial contributions is a tribute to + Anson Burlingame, who died February 23, 1870, at St. Petersburg, + on his trip around the world as special ambassador for the + Chinese Empire. In this editorial Clemens endeavored to pay + something of his debt to the noble statesman. He reviewed + Burlingame's astonishing career—the career which had closed at + forty-seven, and read like a fairy-tale-and he dwelt lovingly on + his hero's nobility of character. At the close he said: + + “He was a good man, and a very, very great man. America, lost a + son, and all the world a servant, when he died.” + + Among those early contributions to the Express is a series called + “Around the World,” an attempt at collaboration with Prof. D. R. + Ford, who did the actual traveling, while Mark Twain, writing in + the first person, gave the letters his literary stamp. At least + some of the contributions were written in this way, such as + “Adventures in Hayti,” “The Pacific,” and “Japan.” These letters + exist to-day only in the old files of the Express, and indeed + this is the case with most of Clemens's work for that paper. It + was mainly ephemeral or timely work, and its larger value has + disappeared. Here and there is a sentence worth remembering. Of + two practical jokers who sent in a marriage notice of persons not + even contemplating matrimony, he said: “This deceit has been + practised maliciously by a couple of men whose small souls will + escape through their pores some day if they do not varnish their + hides.” + + Some of the sketches have been preserved. “Journalism in + Tennessee,” one of the best of his wilder burlesques, is as + enjoyable to-day as when written. “A Curious Dream” made a + lasting impression on his Buffalo readers, and you are pretty + certain to hear of it when you mention Mark Twain in that city + to-day. It vividly called attention to the neglect of the old + North Street graveyard. The gruesome vision of the ancestors + deserting with their coffins on their backs was even more + humiliating than amusing, and inspired a movement for reform. It + has been effective elsewhere since then, and may still be read + with profit—or satisfaction—for in a note at the end the reader + is assured that if the cemeteries of his town are kept in good + order the dream is not leveled at his town at all, but + “particularly and venomously at the next town.” + + + + + LXXVII. THE “GALAXY” + + + Mark Twain's work on the Express represented only a portion of + his literary activities during his Buffalo residence. The Galaxy, + an ambitious New York magazine of that day—[published by Sheldon + & Co. at 498 and 500 Broadway]—proposed to him that he conduct + for them a humorous department. They would pay $2,400 a year for + the work, and allow him a free hand. There was some discussion as + to book rights, but the arrangement was concluded, and his first + instalment, under the general title of “Memoranda,” appeared in + the May number, 1870. In his Introductory he outlined what the + reader might expect, such as “exhaustive statistical tables,” + “Patent Office reports,” and “complete instructions about + farming, even from the grafting of the seed to the harrowing of + the matured crops.” He declared that he would throw a pathos into + the subject of agriculture that would surprise and delight the + world. He added that the “Memoranda” was not necessarily a + humorous department. + + I would not conduct an exclusively and professedly humorous + department for any one. I would always prefer to have the privilege + of printing a serious and sensible remark, in case one occurred to + me, without the reader's feeling obliged to consider himself + outraged.... Puns cannot be allowed a place in this department.... + No circumstance, however dismal, will ever be considered a + sufficient excuse for the admission of that last and saddest + evidence of intellectual poverty, the pun. + + The Galaxy was really a fine magazine, with the best contributors + obtainable; among them Justin McCarthy, S. M. B. Piatt, Richard + Grant White, and many others well known in that day, with names + that still flicker here and there in its literary twilight. The + new department appealed to Clemens, and very soon he was writing + most of his sketches for it. They were better literature, as a + rule, than those published in his own paper. + + The first number of the “Memoranda” was fairly representative of + those that followed it. “The Facts in the Case of the Great Beef + Contract,” a manuscript which he had undertaken three years + before and mislaid, was its initial contribution. Besides the + “Beef Contract,” there was a tribute to George Wakeman, a + well-known journalist of those days; a stricture on the Rev. T. + DeWitt Talmage, who had delivered from the pulpit an argument + against workingmen occupying pews in fashionable churches; a + presentment of the Chinese situation in San Francisco, depicting + the cruel treatment of the Celestial immigrant; a burlesque of + the Sunday-school “good little boy” story,—[“The Story of the + Good Little Boy Who Did Not Prosper” and the “Beef Contract” are + included in Sketches New and Old; also the Chinese sketch, under + the title, “Disgraceful Persecution of a Boy.”]—and several + shorter skits—and anecdotes, ten pages in all; a rather generous + contract. + + Mark Twain's comment on Talmage was prompted by an article in + which Talmage had assumed the premise that if workingmen attended + the churches it would drive the better class of worshipers away. + Among other things he said: + + I have a good Christian friend who, if he sat in the front pew in + church, and a workingman should enter the door at the other end, + would smell him instantly. My friend is not to blame for the + sensitiveness of his nose, any more than you would flog a pointer + for being keener on the scent than a stupid watch-dog. The fact is, + if you had all the churches free, by reason of the mixing of the + common people with the uncommon, you would keep one-half of + Christendom sick at their stomach. If you are going to kill the + church thus with bad smells I will have nothing to do with this + work of evangelization. + + Commenting on this Mark Twain said—well, he said a good deal more + than we have room for here, but a portion of his closing + paragraphs is worth preserving. He compares the Reverend Mr. + Talmage with the early disciples of Christ—Paul and Peter and the + others; or, rather, he contrasts him with them. + + They healed the very beggars, and held intercourse with people of a + villainous odor every day. If the subject of these remarks had been + chosen among the original Twelve Apostles he would not have + associated with the rest, because he could not have stood the fishy + smell of some of his comrades who came from around the Sea of + Galilee. He would have resigned his commission with some such + remark as he makes in the extract quoted above: “Master, if thou + art going to kill the church thus with bad smells I will have + nothing to do with this work of evangelization.” He is a disciple, + and makes that remark to the Master; the only difference is that he + makes it in the nineteenth instead of the first century. + + Talmage was immensely popular at this time, and Mark Twain's open + attack on him must have shocked a good many Galaxy readers, as + perhaps his article on the Chinese cruelties offended the + citizens of San Francisco. It did not matter. He was not likely + to worry over the friends he would lose because of any stand + taken for human justice. Lamed said of him: “He was very far from + being one who tried in any way to make himself popular.” + Certainly he never made any such attempt at the expense of his + convictions. + + The first Galaxy instalment was a sort of platform of principles + for the campaign that was to follow. Not that each month's + contribution contained personal criticism, or a defense of the + Chinese (of whom he was always the champion as long as he lived), + but a good many of them did. In the October number he began a + series of letters under the general title of “Goldsmith's Friend + Abroad Again,” supposed to have been written by a Chinese + immigrant in San Francisco, detailing his experience there. In a + note the author says: “No experience is set down in the following + letters which had to be invented. Fancy is not needed to give + variety to the history of the Chinaman's sojourn in America. + Plain fact is amply sufficient.” The letters show how the + supposed Chinese writer of them had set out for America, + believing it to be a land whose government was based on the + principle that all men are created equal, and treated + accordingly; how, upon arriving in San Francisco, he was kicked + and bruised and beaten, and set upon by dogs, flung into jail, + tried and condemned without witnesses, his own race not being + allowed to testify against Americans—Irish-Americans—in the San + Francisco court. They are scathing, powerful letters, and one + cannot read them, even in this day of improved conditions, + without feeling the hot waves of resentment and indignation which + Mark Twain must have felt when he penned them. + + Reverend Mr. Talmage was not the only divine to receive attention + in the “Memoranda.” The Reverend Mr. Sabine, of New York, who had + declined to hold a church burial service for the old actor, + George Holland, came in for the most caustic as well as the most + artistic stricture of the entire series. It deserves preservation + to-day, not only for its literary value, but because no finer + defense of the drama, no more searching sermon on + self-righteousness, has ever been put into concrete form.—[“The + Indignity Put Upon the Remains of Gorge Holland by the Rev. Mr. + Sabine”; Galaxy for February, 1871. The reader will find it + complete under Appendix J, at the end of last volume.] + + The “Little Church Around the Corner” on Twenty-ninth Street + received that happy title from this incident. + + “There is a little church around the corner that will, perhaps, + permit the service,” Mr. Sabine had said to Holland's friends. + + The little church did permit the service, and there was conferred + upon it the new name, which it still bears. It has sheltered a + long line of actor folk and their friends since then, earning + thereby reverence, gratitude, and immortal memory.—[Church of the + Transfiguration. Memorial services were held there for Joseph + Jefferson; and a memorial window, by John La Farge, has been + placed there in memory of Edwin Booth.] + + Of the Galaxy contributions a number are preserved in Sketches + New and Old. “How I Edited an Agricultural Paper” is one of the + best of these—an excellent example of Mark Twain's more + extravagant style of humor. It is perennially delightful; in + France it has been dramatized, and is still played. + + A successful Galaxy feature, also preserved in the Sketches, was + the “Burlesque Map of Paris,” reprinted from the Express. The + Franco-Prussian War was in progress, and this travesty was + particularly timely. It creates only a smile of amusement to-day, + but it was all fresh and delightful then. Schuyler Colfax, by + this time Vice-President, wrote to him: “I have had the heartiest + possible laugh over it, and so have all my family. You are a + wicked, conscienceless wag, who ought to be punished severely.” + + The “Official Commendations,” which accompany the map, are its + chief charm. They are from Grant, Bismarck, Brigham Young, and + others, the best one coming from one J. Smith, who says: + + My wife was for years afflicted with freckles, and though + everything was done for her relief that could be done, all was in + vain. But, sir, since her first glance at your map they have + entirely left her. She has nothing but convulsions now. + + It is said that the “Map of Paris” found its way to Berlin, where + the American students in the beer-halls used to pretend to + quarrel over it until they attracted the attention of the German + soldiers that might be present. Then they would wander away and + leave it on the table and watch results. The soldiers would + pounce upon it and lose their tempers over it; then finally abuse + it and revile its author, to the satisfaction of everybody. + + The larger number of “Memoranda” sketches have properly found + oblivion to-day. They were all, or nearly all, collected by a + Canadian pirate, C. A. Backas, in a volume bearing the title of + Memoranda,—[Also by a harpy named John Camden Hotten (of London), + of whom we shall hear again. Hotten had already pirated The + Innocents, and had it on the market before Routledge could bring + out the authorized edition. Routledge later published the + “Memoranda” under the title of Sketches, including the contents + of the Jumping Frog book.]—a book long ago suppressed. Only about + twenty of the Galaxy contributions found place in Sketches New + and Old, five years later, and some of these might have been + spared as literature. “To Raise Poultry,” “John Chinaman in New + York,” and “History Repeats Itself” are valuable only as examples + of his work at that period. The reader may consult them for + himself. + + + + + LXXVIII. THE PRIMROSE PATH + + + But we are losing sight of more important things. From the very + beginning Mark Twain's home meant always more to him than his + work. The life at 472 Delaware Avenue had begun with as fair a + promise as any matrimonial journey ever undertaken: There seemed + nothing lacking: a beautiful home, sufficient income, bright + prospects—these things, with health and love; constitute married + happiness. Mrs. Clemens wrote to her sister, Mrs. Crane, at the + end of February: “Sue, we are two as happy people as you ever + saw. Our days seem to be made up of only bright sunlight, with no + shadow in them.” In the same letter the husband added: “Livy + pines and pines every day for you, and I pine and pine every day + for you, and when we both of us are pining at once you would + think it was a whole pine forest let loose.” + + To Redpath, who was urging lecture engagements for the coming + season, he wrote: + + DEAR RED,—I am not going to lecture any more forever. I have got + things ciphered down to a fraction now. I know just about what it + will cost to live, and I can make the money without lecturing. + Therefore, old man, count me out. + + And still later, in May: + + I guess I am out of the field permanently. Have got a lovely wife, + a lovely house, bewitchingly furnished, a lovely carriage, and a + coachman whose style and dignity are simply awe-in-spiring, nothing + less; and I am making more money than necessary, by considerable, + and therefore why crucify myself nightly on the platform? The + subscriber will have to be excused for the present season at least. + + So they were very happy during those early months, acquiring + pleasantly the education which any matrimonial experience is sure + to furnish, accustoming themselves to the uses of housekeeping, + to life in partnership, with all the discoveries and mental and + spiritual adaptations that belong to the close association of + marriage. They were far, very far, apart on many subjects. He was + unpolished, untrained, impulsive, sometimes violent. Twichell + remembers that in the earlier days of their acquaintance he wore + a slouch hat pulled down in front, and smoked a cigar that + sometimes tilted up and touched the brim of it. The atmosphere + and customs of frontier life, the Westernisms of that day, still + clung to him. Mrs. Clemens, on the other hand, was conservative, + dainty, cultured, spiritual. He adored her as little less than a + saint, and she became, indeed, his saving grace. She had all the + personal refinement which he lacked, and she undertook the work + of polishing and purifying her life companion. She had no wish to + destroy his personality, to make him over, but only to preserve + his best, and she set about it in the right way—gently, and with + a tender gratitude in each achievement. + + She did not entirely approve of certain lines of his reading; or, + rather, she did not understand them in those days. That he should + be fond of history and the sciences was natural enough, but when + the Life of P. T. Barnum, Written by Himself, appeared, and he + sat up nights to absorb it, and woke early and lighted the lamp + to follow the career of the great showman, she was at a loss to + comprehend this particular literary passion, and indeed was + rather jealous of it. She did not realize then his vast interest + in the study of human nature, or that such a book contained what + Mr. Howells calls “the root of the human matter,” the inner + revelation of the human being at first hand. + + Concerning his religious observances her task in the beginning + was easy enough. Clemens had not at that time formulated any + particular doctrines of his own. His natural kindness of heart, + and especially his love for his wife, inclined him toward the + teachings and customs of her Christian faith—unorthodox but + sincere, as Christianity in the Langdon family was likely to be. + It took very little persuasion on his wife's part to establish + family prayers in their home, grace before meals, and the morning + reading of a Bible chapter. Joe Goodman, who made a trip East, + and visited them during the early days of their married life, was + dumfounded to see Mark Twain ask a blessing and join in family + worship. Just how long these forms continued cannot be known + to-day; the time of their abandonment has perished from the + recollection of any one now living. + + It would seem to have been the Bible-reading that wrought the + change. The prayer and the blessing were to him sincere and + gracious; but as the readings continued he realized that he had + never before considered the Bible from a doctrinal point of view, + as a guide to spiritual salvation. To his logical reasoning mind, + a large portion of it seemed absurd: a mass of fables and + traditions, mere mythology. From such material humanity had built + its mightiest edifice of hope, the doctrines of its faith. After + a little while he could stand it no longer. + + “Livy,” he said one day, “you may keep this up if you want to, + but I must ask you to excuse me from it. It is making me a + hypocrite. I don't believe in this Bible. It contradicts my + reason. I can't sit here and listen to it, letting you believe + that I regard it, as you do, in the light of gospel, the word of + God.” + + He was moved to write an article on the human idea of God, + ancient and modern. It contained these paragraphs: + + The difference in importance, between the God of the Bible and the + God of the present day, cannot be described, it can only be vaguely + and inadequately figured to the mind.... If you make figures to + represent the earth and moon, and allow a space of one inch between + them, to represent the four hundred thousand miles of distance + which lies between the two bodies, the map will have to be eleven + miles long in order to bring in the nearest fixed star. —[His + figures were far too small. A map drawn on the scale of 400,000 + miles to the inch would need to be 1,100 miles long to take in both + the earth and the nearest fixed star. On such a map the earth would + be one-fiftieth of an inch in diameter—the size of a small grain of + sand.]—So one cannot put the modern heavens on a map, nor the + modern God; but the Bible God and the Bible heavens can be set down + on a slate and yet not be discommoded.... + The difference between that universe and the modern one revealed by + science is as the difference between a dust-flecked ray in a barn + and the sublime arch of the Milky Way in the skies. Its God was + strictly proportioned to its dimensions. His sole solicitude was + about a handful of truculent nomads. He worried and fretted over + them in a peculiarly and distractingly human way. One day he coaxed + and petted them beyond their due, the next he harried and lashed + them beyond their deserts. He sulked, he cursed, he raged, he + grieved, according to his mood and the circumstances, but all to no + purpose; his efforts were all vain, he could not govern them. When + the fury was on him he was blind to all reason—he not only + slaughtered the offender, but even his harmless little children and + dumb cattle.... + To trust the God of the Bible is to trust an irascible, vindictive, + fierce and ever fickle and changeful master; to trust the true God + is to trust a Being who has uttered no promises, but whose + beneficent, exact, and changeless ordering of the machinery of his + colossal universe is proof that he is at least steadfast to his + purposes; whose unwritten laws, so far as they affect man, being + equal and impartial, show that he is just and fair; these things, + taken together, suggest that if he shall ordain us to live + hereafter, he will still be steadfast, just, and fair toward us. We + shall not need to require anything more. + + It seems mild enough, obvious, even orthodox, now—so far have we + traveled in forty years. But such a declaration then would have + shocked a great number of sincerely devout persons. His wife + prevailed upon him not to print it. She respected his + honesty—even his reasoning, but his doubts were a long grief to + her, nevertheless. In time she saw more clearly with his vision, + but this was long after, when she had lived more with the world, + had become more familiar with its larger needs, and the + proportions of created things. + + They did not mingle much or long with the social life of Buffalo. + They received and returned calls, attended an occasional + reception; but neither of them found such things especially + attractive in those days, so they remained more and more in their + own environment. There is an anecdote which seems to belong here. + + One Sunday morning Clemens noticed smoke pouring from the upper + window of the house across the street. The owner and his wife, + comparatively newcomers, were seated upon the veranda, evidently + not aware of impending danger. The Clemens household thus far had + delayed calling on them, but Clemens himself now stepped briskly + across the street. Bowing with leisurely politeness, he said: + + “My name is Clemens; we ought to have called on you before, and I + beg your pardon for intruding now in this informal way, but your + house is on fire.” + + Almost the only intimate friends they had in Buffalo were in the + family of David Gray, the poet-editor of the Courier. Gray was a + gentle, lovable man. “The gentlest spirit and the loveliest that + ever went clothed in clay, since Sir Galahad laid him to rest,” + Mark Twain once said of him. Both Gray and Clemens were friends + of John Hay, and their families soon became intimate. Perhaps, in + time, the Clemens household would have found other as good + friends in the Buffalo circles; but heavy clouds that had lain + unseen just beyond the horizon during those earlier months of + marriage rose suddenly into view, and the social life, whatever + it might have become, was no longer a consideration. + + + + + LXXIX. THE OLD HUMAN STORY + + + Jervis Langdon was never able to accept his son-in-law's + invitation to the new home. His health began to fail that spring, + and at the end of March, with his physician and Mrs. Langdon, he + made a trip to the South. In a letter written at Richmond he + said, “I have thrown off all care,” and named a list of the four + great interests in which he was involved. Under “number 5,” he + included “everything,” adding, “so you see how good I am to + follow the counsel of my children.” He closed: “Samuel, I love + your wife and she loves me. I think it is only fair that you + should know it, but you need not flare up. I loved her before you + did, and she loved me before she did you, and has not ceased + since. I see no way but for you to make the most of it.” He was + already a very ill man, and this cheerful letter was among the + last he ever wrote. + + He was absent six weeks and seemed to improve, but suffered an + attack early in May; in June his condition became critical. + Clemens and his wife were summoned to Elmira, and joined in the + nursing, day and night. Clemens surprised every one by his + ability as a nurse. His delicacy and thoughtfulness were + unfailing; his original ways of doing things always amused and + interested the patient. In later years Mark Twain once said: + + “How much of the nursing did I do? My main watch was from midnight + to four in the morning, nearly four hours. My other watch was a + midday watch, and I think it was nearly three hours. The two + sisters divided the remaining seventeen hours of the twenty-four + hours between them, and each of them tried generously and + persistently to swindle the other out of a part of her watch. I + went to bed early every night, and tried to get sleep enough by + midnight to fit me for my work, but it was always a failure. I went + on watch sleepy and remained miserable, sleepy, and wretched, + straight along through the four hours. I can still see myself + sitting by that bed in the melancholy stillness of the sweltering + night, mechanically waving a palm-leaf fan over the drawn, white + face of the patient. I can still recall my noddings, my fleeting + unconsciousness, when the fan would come to a standstill in my + hand, and I woke up with a start and a hideous shock. During all + that dreary time I began to watch for the dawn long before it came. + When the first faint gray showed through the window-blinds I felt + as no doubt a castaway feels when the dim threads of the looked-for + ship appear against the sky. I was well and strong, but I was a + man, afflicted with a man's infirmity—lack of endurance.” + + He always dealt with himself in this unsparing way; but those who + were about him then have left a different story. + + It was all without avail. Mr. Langdon rallied, and early in July + there was hope for his recovery. He failed again, and on the + afternoon of the 6th of August he died. To Mrs. Clemens, delicate + and greatly worn with the anxiety and strain of watching, the + blow was a crushing one. It was the beginning of a series of + disasters which would mark the entire remaining period of their + Buffalo residence. + + There had been a partial plan for spending the summer in England, + and a more definite one for joining the Twichells in the + Adirondacks. Both of these projects were now abandoned. Mrs. + Clemens concluded that she would be better at home than anywhere + else, and invited an old school friend, a Miss Emma Nye, to visit + her. + + But the shadow of death had not been lifted from the Clemens + household. Miss Nye presently fell ill with typhoid fever. There + followed another long period of anxiety and nursing, ending with + the death of the visitor in the new home, September 29th. The + young wife was now in very delicate health; genuinely ill, in + fact. The happy home had become a place of sorrow-of troubled + nights and days. Another friend came to cheer them, and on this + friend's departure Mrs. Clemens drove to the railway station. It + was a hurried trip over rough streets to catch the train. She was + prostrated on her return, and a little later, November 7, 1870, + her first child, Langdon, was prematurely born. A dangerous + illness followed, and complete recovery was long delayed. But on + the 12th the crisis seemed passed, and the new father wrote a + playful letter to the Twichells, as coming from the late arrival: + + DEAR UNCLE AND AUNT,—I came into the world on the 7th inst., and + consequently am about five days old now. I have had wretched health + ever since I made my appearance... I am not corpulent, nor am I + robust in any way. At birth I only weighed four and one-half pounds + with my clothes on—and the clothes were the chief feature of the + weight, too, I am obliged to confess, but I am doing finely, all + things considered.... My little mother is very bright and cheery, + and I guess she is pretty happy, but I don't know what about. She + laughs a great deal, notwithstanding she is sick abed. + P. S.—Father says I had better write because you will be more + interested in me, just now, than in the rest of the family. + + A week later Clemens, as himself, wrote: + + Livy is up and the prince keeps her busy and anxious these latter + days and nights, but I am a bachelor up-stairs and don't have to + jump up and get the soothing sirup, though I would as soon do it as + not, I assure you. (Livy will be certain to read this letter.) + Tell Harmony that I do hold the baby, and do it pretty handily too, + though with occasional apprehensions that his loose head will fall + off. I don't have to quiet him; he hardly ever utters a cry. He is + always thinking about something. He is a patient, good little baby. + + Further along he refers to one of his reforms: + + Smoke? I always smoke from three till five on Sunday afternoons, + and in New York, the other day, I smoked a week, day and night. But + when Livy is well I smoke only those two hours on Sunday. I'm boss + of the habit now, and shall never let it boss me any more. + Originally I quit solely on Livy's account (not that I believed + there was the faintest reason in the matter, but just as I would + deprive myself of sugar in my coffee if she wished it, or quit + wearing socks if she thought them immoral), and I stick to it yet + on Livy's account, and shall always continue to do so without a + pang. But somehow it seems a pity that you quit, for Mrs. T. didn't + mind it, if I remember rightly. Ah, it is turning one's back upon a + kindly Providence to spurn away from us the good creature he sent + to make the breath of life a luxury as well as a necessity, + enjoyable as well as useful. To go quit smoking, when there ain't + any sufficient excuse for it!—why, my old boy, when they used to + tell me I would shorten my life ten years by smoking, they little + knew the devotee they were wasting their puerile words upon; they + little knew how trivial and valueless I would regard a decade that + had no smoking in it! But I won't persuade you, Twichell—I won't + until I see you again—but then we'll smoke for a week together, and + then shut off again. + + + + + LXXX. LITERARY PROJECTS + + + The success of the Innocents naturally made a thrifty publisher + like Bliss anxious for a second experiment. He had begun early in + the year to talk about another book, but nothing had come of it + beyond a project or two, more or less hazy and unpursued. Clemens + at one time developed a plan for a Noah's Ark book, which was to + detail the cruise of the Ark in diaries kept by various members + of it-Shem, Ham, and the others. He really wrote some of it at + the time, and it was an idea he never entirely lost track of. All + along among his manuscripts appear fragments from those ancient + voyagers. One of the earlier entries will show the style and + purpose of the undertaking. It is from Shem's record: + + Friday: Papa's birthday. He is 600 years old. We celebrated it in a + big, black tent. Principal men of the tribe present. Afterward they + were shown over the ark, which was looking desolate and empty and + dreary on account of a misunderstanding with the workmen about + wages. Methuselah was as free with his criticisms as usual, and as + voluble and familiar, which I and my brothers do not like; for we + are past our one hundredth year and married. He still calls me + Shemmy, just as he did when I was a child of sixty. I am still but + a youth, it is true, but youth has its feelings, and I do not like + this.... + Saturday: Keeping the Sabbath. + Sunday: Papa has yielded the advance and everybody is hard at work. + The shipyard is so crowded that the men hinder each other; + everybody hurrying or being hurried; the rush and confusion and + shouting and wrangling are astonishing to our family, who have + always been used to a quiet, country life. + + It was from this germ that in a later day grew the diaries of + Adam and Eve, though nothing very satisfactory ever came of this + preliminary attempt. The author had faith in it, however. To + Bliss he wrote: + + I mean to take plenty of time and pains with the Noah's Ark book; + maybe it will be several years before it is all written, but it + will be a perfect lightning striker when it is done. + You can have the first say (that is plain enough) on that or any + other book I may prepare for the press, as long as you deal in a + fair, open, and honorable way with me. I do not think you will ever + find me doing otherwise with you. I can get a book ready for you + any time you want it; but you can't want one before this time next + year, so I have plenty of time. + + Bliss was only temporarily appeased. He realized that to get a + book ready by the time he wanted it-a book of sufficient size and + importance to maintain the pace set by the Innocents meant rather + more immediate action than his author seemed to contemplate. + Futhermore, he knew that other publishers were besieging the + author of the Innocents; a disquieting thought. In early July, + when Mr. Langdon's condition had temporarily improved, Bliss had + come to Elmira and proposed a book which should relate the + author's travels and experiences in the Far West. It was an + inviting subject, and Clemens, by this time more attracted by the + idea of authorship and its rewards, readily enough agreed to + undertake the volume. He had been offered half profits, and + suggested that the new contract be arranged upon these terms. + Bliss, figuring on a sale of 100,000 copies, proposed seven and + one-half per cent. royalty as an equivalent, and the contract was + so arranged. In after-years, when the cost of manufacture and + paper had become greatly reduced, Clemens, with but a confused + notion of business details, believed he had been misled by Bliss + in this contract, and was bitter and resentful accordingly. The + figures remain, however, to show that Bliss dealt fairly. Seven + and one-half per cent. of a subscription book did represent half + profits up to 100,000 copies when the contract was drawn; but it + required ten years to sell that quantity, and in that time + conditions had changed. Bliss could hardly foresee that these + things would be so, and as he was dead when the book touched the + 100,000 mark he could not explain or readjust matters, whatever + might have been his inclination. + + Clemens was pleased enough with the contract when it was made. To + Orion he wrote July 15 (1870): + + Per contract I must have another six-hundred-page book ready for my + publisher January 1st, and I only began it to-day. The subject of + it is a secret, because I may possibly change it. But as it stands + I propose to do up Nevada and California, beginning with the trip + across the country in the stage. Have you a memorandum of the route + we took, or the names of any of the stations we stopped at? Do you + remember any of the scenes, names, incidents, or adventures of the + coach trip?—for I remember next to nothing about the matter. Jot + down a foolscap page of items for me. I wish I could have two days' + talk with you. + I suppose I am to get the biggest copyright this time ever paid on + a subscription book in this country. + + The work so promptly begun made little progress. Hard days of + illness and sorrow followed, and it was not until September that + it was really under way. His natural enthusiasm over any new + undertaking possessed him. On the 4th he wrote Bliss: + + During the past week I have written the first four chapters of + the book, and I tell you 'The Innocents Abroad' will have to get + up early to beat it. It will be a book that will jump straight + into continental celebrity the first month it is issued. + + He prophesied a sale of 90,000 copies during the first twelve + months and declared, “I see the capabilities of the subject.” + + But further disasters, even then impending, made continued effort + impossible; the prospect of the new book for a time became + gloomy, the idea of it less inspiring. Other plans presented + themselves, and at one time he thought of letting the Galaxy + publishers get out a volume of his sketches. In October he wrote + Bliss that he was “driveling along tolerably fair on the book, + getting off from twelve to twenty pages of manuscript a day.” + Bliss naturally discouraged the Galaxy idea, and realizing that + the new book might be long delayed, agreed to get out a volume of + miscellany sufficiently large and important for subscription + sales. He was doubtful of the wisdom of this plan, and when + Clemens suddenly proposed a brand-new scheme his publisher very + readily agreed to hold back the publication of Sketches + indefinitely. + + The new book was to be adventures in the diamond mines of South + Africa, then newly opened and of wide public interest. Clemens + did not propose to visit the mines himself, but to let another + man do the traveling, make the notes, and write or tell him the + story, after which Clemens would enlarge and elaborate it in his + own fashion. His adaptation of the letters of Professor Ford, a + year earlier, had convinced him that his plan would work out + successfully on a larger scale; he fixed upon his old friend, J. + H. Riley, of Washington—[“Riley-Newspaper Correspondent.” See + Sketches.]—(earlier of San Francisco), as the proper person to do + the traveling. At the end of November he wrote Bliss: + + I have put my greedy hands upon the best man in America for my + purpose, and shall start him to the diamond field in South Africa + within a fortnight at my expense... that the book will have a + perfectly beautiful sale. + + He suggested that Bliss advance Riley's expense money, the amount + to be deducted from the first royalty returns; also he proposed + an increased royalty, probably in view of the startling splendor + of the new idea. Bliss was duly impressed, and the agreement was + finally made on a basis of eight and one-half per cent., with an + advance of royalty sufficient to see Riley to South Africa and + return. + + Clemens had not yet heard from Riley definitely when he wrote his + glowing letter to Bliss. He took it for granted that Riley, + always an adventurous sort, would go. When Riley wrote him that + he felt morally bound to the Alta, of which he was then + Washington correspondent, also in certain other directions till + the end of the session, Clemens wrote him at great length, + detailing his scheme in full and urging him to write instantly to + the Alta and others, asking a release on the ground of being + offered a rare opportunity to improve his fortunes. + + You know right well that I would not have you depart a hair from + any obligation for any money. The boundless confidence that I + have in you is born of a conviction of your integrity in small as + well as in great things. I know plenty of men whose integrity I + would trust to here, but not off yonder in Africa. + + His proposal, in brief, to Riley was that the latter should make + the trip to Africa without expense to himself, collect memoranda, + and such diamond mines as might be found lying about handy. Upon + his return he was to take up temporary residence in the Clemens + household until the book was finished, after which large benefits + were to accrue to everybody concerned. In the end Riley obtained + a release from his obligations and was off for the diamond mines + and fortune. + + Poor fellow! He was faithful in his mission, and it is said that + he really located a mining claim that would have made him and his + independent for all time to come; but returning home with his + precious memoranda and the news of good fortune, he accidentally + wounded himself with a fork while eating; blood-poisoning set in + (they called it cancer then), and he was only able to get home to + die. His memoranda were never used, his mining claim was never + identified. Certainly, death was closely associated with Mark + Twain's fortunes during those earlier days of his married life. + + On the whole the Buffalo residence was mainly a gloomy one; its + ventures were attended by ill-fortune. For some reason Mark + Twain's connection with the Express, while it had given the paper + a wide reputation, had not largely increased its subscription. + Perhaps his work on it was too varied and erratic. Nasby, who had + popularized the Toledo Blade, kept steadily to one line. His + farmer public knew always just what to expect when their weekly + edition arrived. + + Clemens and his wife dreamed of a new habitation, and new faces + and surroundings. They agreed to offer their home and his + interests in the Express for sale. They began to talk of + Hartford, where Twichell lived, and where Orion Clemens and his + wife had recently located. + + Mark Twain's new fortunes had wrought changes in the affairs of + his relatives. Already, before his marriage, he had prospected + towns here and there with a view to finding an Eastern residence + for his mother and sister, and he had kept Orion's welfare always + in mind. When Pamela and her daughter came to his wedding he told + them of a little city by the name of Fredonia (New York), not far + from Buffalo, where he thought they might find a pleasant home. + + “I went in there by night and out by night,” he said, “so I saw + none of it, but I had an intelligent, attractive audience. + Prospect Fredonia and let me know what it is like. Try to select + a place where a good many funerals pass. Ma likes funerals. If + you can pick a good funeral corner she will be happy.” + + It was in her later life that Jane Clemens had developed this + particular passion. She would consult the morning paper for any + notice of obsequies and attend those that were easy of access. + Watching the processions go by gave her a peculiar joy. Mrs. + Moffett and her daughter did go to Fredonia immediately following + the wedding. They found it residentially attractive, and rented a + house before returning to St. Louis, a promptness that somewhat + alarmed the old lady, who did not altogether fancy the idea of + being suddenly set down in a strange house, in a strange land, + even though it would be within hailing distance of Sam and his + new wife. Perhaps the Fredonia funerals were sufficiently + numerous and attractive, for she soon became attached to the + place, and entered into the spirit of the life there, joining its + temperance crusades, and the like, with zest and enjoyment. + + Onion remained in St. Louis, but when Bliss established a paper + called The Publisher, and wanted an editor, he was chosen for the + place, originally offered to his brother; the latter, writing to + Onion, said: + + If you take the place with an air of perfect confidence in + yourself, never once letting anything show in your bearing but a + quiet, modest, entire, and perfect confidence in your ability to + do pretty much anything in the world, Bliss will think you are + the very man he needs; but don't show any shadow of timidity or + unsoldierly diffidence, for that sort of thing is fatal to + advancement. + + I warn you thus because you are naturally given to knocking your + pot over in this way, when a little judicious conduct would make + it boil. + + + + + LXXXI. SOME FURTHER LITERARY MATTERS + + + Meantime The Innocents Abroad had continued to prosper. Its + author ranked mainly as a humorist, but of such colossal + proportions that his contemporaries had seemed to dwindle; the + mighty note of the “Frog of Calaveras” had dwarfed a score of + smaller peepers. At the end of a year from its date of + publication the book had sold up to 67,000 and was continuing at + the rate of several thousand monthly. + + “You are running it in staving, tiptop, first-class style,” + Clemens wrote to Bliss. “On the average ten people a day come and + hunt me up to tell me I am a benefactor! I guess that is a part + of the program we didn't expect, in the first place.” + + Apparently the book appealed to readers of every grade. One + hundred and fifteen copies were in constant circulation at the + Mercantile Library, in New York, while in the most remote cabins + of America it was read and quoted. Jack Van Nostrand, making a + long horseback tour of Colorado, wrote: + + I stopped a week ago in a ranch but a hundred miles from nowhere. + The occupant had just two books: the Bible and The Innocents + Abroad—the former in good repair. + + Across the ocean the book had found no less favor, and was being + translated into many and strange tongues. By what seems now some + veritable magic its author's fame had become literally universal. + The consul at Hongkong, discussing English literature with a + Chinese acquaintance, a mandarin, mentioned The Pilgrim's + Progress. + + “Yes, indeed, I have read it!” the mandarin said, eagerly. “We + are enjoying it in China, and shall have it soon in our own + language. It is by Mark Twain.” + + In England the book had an amazing vogue from the beginning, and + English readers were endeavoring to outdo the Americans in + appreciation. Indeed, as a rule, English readers of culture, + critical readers, rose to an understanding of Mark Twain's + literary value with greater promptness than did the same class of + readers at home. There were exceptions, of course. There were + English critics who did not take Mark Twain seriously, there were + American critics who did. Among the latter was a certain William + Ward, an editor of a paper down in Macon, Georgia—The Beacon. + Ward did not hold a place with the great magazine arbiters of + literary rank. He was only an obscure country editor, but he + wrote like a prophet. His article—too long to quote in + full—concerned American humorists in general, from Washington + Irving, through John Phoenix, Philander Doesticks, Sut + Lovingwood, Artemus Ward, Josh Billings and Petroleum V. Nasby, + down to Mark Twain. With the exception of the first and last + named he says of them: + + They have all had, or will have, their day. Some of them are + resting beneath the sod, and others still live whose work will + scarcely survive them. Since Irving no humorist in prose has held + the foundation of a permanent fame except it be Mark Twain, and + this, as in the case of Irving, is because he is a pure writer. + Aside from any subtle mirth that lurks through his composition, the + grace and finish of his more didactic and descriptive sentences + indicate more than mediocrity. + + The writer then refers to Mark Twain's description of the Sphinx, + comparing it with Bulwer's, which he thinks may have influenced + it. He was mistaken in this, for Clemens had not read + Bulwer—never could read him at any length. + + Of the English opinions, that of The Saturday Review was perhaps + most doubtful. It came along late in 1870, and would hardly be + worth recalling if it were not for a resulting, or collateral, + interest. Clemens saw notice of this review before he saw the + review itself. A paragraph in the Boston Advertiser spoke of The + Saturday Review as treating the absurdities of the Innocents from + a serious standpoint. The paragraph closed: + + We can imagine the delight of the humorist in reading this tribute + to his power; and indeed it is so amusing in itself that he can + hardly do better than reproduce the article in full in his next + monthly “Memoranda.” + + The old temptation to hoax his readers prompted Mark Twain to + “reproduce” in the Galaxy, not the Review article, which he had + not yet seen, but an imaginary Review article, an article in + which the imaginary reviewer would be utterly devoid of any sense + of humor and treat the most absurd incidents of The New Pilgrim's + Progress as if set down by the author in solemn and serious + earnest. The pretended review began: + + Lord Macaulay died too soon. We never felt this so deeply as when + we finished the last chapter of the above-named extravagant work. + Macaulay died too soon; for none but he could mete out complete and + comprehensive justice to the insolence, the impudence, the + presumption, the mendacity, and, above all, the majestic ignorance + of this author. + + The review goes on to cite cases of the author's gross deception. + It says: + + Let the cultivated English student of human nature picture to + himself this Mark Twain as a person capable of doing the following + described things; and not only doing them, but, with incredible + innocence, printing them tranquilly and calmly in a book. For + instance: + He states that he entered a hair-dresser's in Paris to get a shave, + and the first “rake” the barber gave him with his razor it loosened + his “hide,” and lifted him out of the chair. + This is unquestionably extravagant. In Florence he was so annoyed + by beggars that he pretends to have seized and eaten one in a + frantic spirit of revenge. There is, of course, no truth in this. + He gives at full length the theatrical program, seventeen or + eighteen hundred years old, which he professes to have found in the + ruins of the Colosseum, among the dirt-and mold and rubbish. It is + a sufficient comment upon this subject to remark that even a cast- + iron program would not have lasted so long under the circumstances. + + There were two and one-half pages of this really delightful + burlesque which the author had written with huge-enjoyment, + partly as a joke on the Review, partly to trick American editors, + who he believed would accept it as a fresh and startling proof of + the traditional English lack of humor. + + But, as in the early sage-brush hoaxes, he rather overdid the + thing. Readers and editors readily enough accepted it as genuine, + so far as having come from The Saturday Review; but most of them, + regarded it as a delicious bit of humor which Mark Twain himself + had taken seriously, and was therefore the one sold. This was + certainly startling, and by no means gratifying. In the next + issue he undertook that saddest of all performances with tongue + or pen: he explained his joke, and insisted on the truth of the + explanation. Then he said: + + If any man doubts my word now I will kill him. No, I will not kill + him; I will win his money. I will bet him twenty to one, and let + any New York publisher hold the stakes, that the statements I have + above made as to the authorship of the article in question are + entirely true. + + But the Cincinnati Enquirer persisted in continuing the joke—in + “rubbing it in,” as we say now. The Enquirer declared that Mark + Twain had been intensely mortified at having been so badly taken + in; that his explanation in the Galaxy was “ingenious, but + unfortunately not true.” The Enquirer maintained that The + Saturday Review of October 8, 1870, did contain the article + exactly as printed in the “Memoranda,” and advised Mark Twain to + admit that he was sold, and say no more about it. + + This was enraging. Mark Twain had his own ideas as to how far a + joke might be carried without violence, and this was a good way + beyond the limits. He denounced the Enquirer's statement as a + “pitiful, deliberate falsehood,” in his anger falling into the + old-time phrasing of newspaper editorial abuse. He offered to bet + them a thousand dollars in cash that they could not prove their + assertions, and asked pointedly, in conclusion: “Will they + swallow that falsehood ignominiously, or will they send an agent + to the Galaxy office? I think the Cincinnati Enquirer must be + edited by children.” He promised that if they did not accept his + financial proposition he would expose them in the next issue. + + The incident closed there. He was prevented, by illness in his + household, from contributing to the next issue, and the second + issue following was his final “Memoranda” installment. So the + matter perished and was forgotten. It was his last editorial + hoax. Perhaps he concluded that hoaxes in any form were dangerous + playthings; they were too likely to go off at the wrong end. + + It was with the April number (1871) that he concluded his + relations with the Galaxy. In a brief valedictory he gave his + reasons: + + I have now written for the Galaxy a year. For the last eight + months, with hardly an interval, I have had for my fellows and + comrades, night and day, doctors and watchers of the sick! During + these eight months death has taken two members of my home circle + and malignantly threatened two others. All this I have experienced, + yet all the time have been under contract to furnish “humorous” + matter, once a month, for this magazine. I am speaking the exact + truth in the above details. Please to put yourself in my place and + contemplate the grisly grotesqueness of the situation. I think that + some of the “humor” I have written during this period could have + been injected into a funeral sermon without disturbing the + solemnity of the occasion. + The “Memoranda” will cease permanently with this issue of the + magazine. To be a pirate on a low salary, and with no share in the + profits of the business, used to be my idea of an uncomfortable + occupation, but I have other views now. To be a monthly humorist in + a cheerless time is drearier. + + Without doubt he felt a glad relief in being rid of this + recurrent, imperative demand. He wrote to Orion that he had told + the Galaxy people he would not write another article, long or + short, for less than $500, and preferred not to do it at all. + + The Galaxy department and the work on the Express were Mark + Twain's farewell to journalism; for the “Memoranda” was + essentially journalistic, almost as much so, and as liberally, as + his old-time Enterprise position. Apparently he wrote with + absolute freedom, unhampered by editorial policy or restriction. + The result was not always pleasant, and it was not always + refined. We may be certain that it was because of Mrs. Clemens's + heavy burdens that year, and her consequent inability to exert a + beneficent censorship, that more than one—more than a dozen—of + the “Memoranda” contributions were permitted to see the light of + print. + + As a whole, the literary result of Mark Twain's Buffalo period + does not reach the high standard of The Innocents Abroad. It was + a retrogression—in some measure a return to his earlier form. It + had been done under pressure, under heavy stress of mind, as he + said. Also there was another reason; neither the subject treated + nor the environment of labor had afforded that lofty inspiration + which glorified every step of the Quaker City journey. Buffalo + was a progressive city—a beautiful city, as American cities + go—but it was hardly an inspiring city for literature, and a + dull, dingy newspaper office was far, very far, from the pleasant + decks of the Quaker City, the camp-fires of Syria, the blue sky + and sea of the Mediterranean. + + + + + LXXXII. THE WRITING OF “ROUGHING IT” + + + The third book published by Mark Twa in was not the Western book + he was preparing for Bliss. It was a small volume, issued by + Sheldon & Co., entitled Mark Twain's Autobiography (Burlesque) + and First Romance. The Romance was the “Awful, Terrible Medieval + Romance” which had appeared in the Express at the beginning of + 1870. The burlesque autobiography had not previously appeared. + The two made a thin little book, which, in addition to its + literary features, had running through it a series of full-page, + irrelevant pictures—-cartoons of the Erie Railroad Ring, + presented as illustrations of a slightly modified version of “The + House That Jack Built.” The “House” was the Erie headquarters, + the purpose being to illustrate the swindling methods of the + Ring. The faces of Jay Gould, James Fisk, Jr., John T. Hoffman, + and others of the combination, are chiefly conspicuous. The + publication was not important, from any standpoint. Literary + burlesque is rarely important, and it was far from Mark Twain's + best form of expression. A year or two later he realized the + mistake of this book, bought in the plates and destroyed them. + + Meantime the new Western book was at a standstill. To Orion, in + March, he wrote: + + I am still nursing Livy night and day. I am nearly worn out. We + shall go to Elmira ten days hence (if Livy can travel on a mattress + then), and stay there until I finish the California book, say three + months. But I can't begin work right away when I get there; must + have a week's rest, for I have been through thirty days' terrific + siege. + + He promised to forward some of the manuscript soon. + + Hold on four or five days and I will see if I can get a few + chapters fixed to send to Bliss.... + I have offered this house and the Express for sale, and when we go + to Elmira we leave here for good. I shall not select a new home + till the book is finished, but we have little doubt that Hartford + will be the place. + + He disposed of his interest in the Express in April, at a + sacrifice of $10,000 on the purchase price. Mrs. Clemens and the + baby were able to travel, and without further delay he took them + to Elmira, to Quarry Farm. + + Quarry Farm, the home of Mrs. Clemens's sister, Mrs. Theodore + Crane, is a beautiful hilltop, with a wide green slope, + overlooking the hazy city and the Chemung River, beyond which are + the distant hills. It was bought quite incidentally by Mr. and + Mrs. Langdon, who, driving by one evening, stopped to water the + horses and decided that it would make a happy summer retreat, + where the families could combine their housekeeping arrangements + during vacation days. When the place had first been purchased, + they had debated on a name for it. They had tried several, among + them “Go-as-you-please Hall,” “Crane's Nest,” and had finally + agreed upon “Rest and Be Thankful.” But this was only its + official name. There was an abandoned quarry up the hill, a + little way from the house, and the title suggested by Thomas K. + Beecher came more naturally to the tongue. The place became + Quarry Farm, and so remains. + + Clemens and his wife had fully made up their minds to live in + Hartford. They had both conceived an affection for the place, + Clemens mainly because of Twichell, while both of them yearned + for the congenial literary and social atmosphere, and the welcome + which they felt awaited them. Hartford was precisely what Buffalo + in that day was not—a home for the literary man. It held a + distinguished group of writers, most of whom the Clemenses + already knew. Furthermore, with Bliss as publisher of the Mark + Twain books, it held their chief business interests. + + Their plans for going were not very definite as to time. Clemens + found that his work went better at the farm, and that Mrs. + Clemens and the delicate baby daily improved. They decided to + remain at Quarry Farm for the summer, their first summer in that + beautiful place which would mean so much to them in the years to + come. + + It was really Joe Goodman, as much as anything, that stirred a + fresh enthusiasm in the new book. Goodman arrived just when the + author's spirits were at low ebb. + + “Joe,” he said, “I guess I'm done for. I don't appear to be able + to get along at all with my work, and what I do write does not + seem valuable. I'm afraid I'll never be able to reach the + standard of 'The Innocents Abroad' again. Here is what I have + written, Joe. Read it, and see if that is your opinion.” + + Goodman took the manuscript and seated himself in a chair, while + Clemens went over to a table and pretended to work. Goodman read + page after page, critically, and was presently absorbed in it. + Clemens watched him furtively, till he could stand it no longer. + Then he threw down his pen, exclaiming: + + “I knew it! I knew it! I am writing nothing but rot. You have sat + there all this time reading without a smile, and pitying the ass + I am making of myself. But I am not wholly to blame. I am not + strong enough to fight against fate. I have been trying to write + a funny book, with dead people and sickness everywhere. Mr. + Langdon died first, then a young lady in our house, and now Mrs. + Clemens and the baby have been at the point of death all winter! + Oh, Joe, I wish to God I could die myself!” + + “Mark,” said Joe, “I was reading critically, not for amusement, + and so far as I have read, and can judge, this is one of the best + things you have ever written. I have found it perfectly + absorbing. You are doing a great book!” + + Clemens knew that Goodman never spoke except from conviction, and + the verdict was to him like a message of life handed down by an + archangel. He was a changed man instantly. He was all enthusiasm, + full of his subject, eager to go on. He proposed to pay Goodman a + salary to stay there and keep him company and furnish him with + inspiration—the Pacific coast atmosphere and vernacular, which he + feared had slipped away from him. Goodman declined the salary, + but extended his visit as long as his plans would permit, and the + two had a happy time together, recalling old Comstock days. Every + morning, for a month or more, they used to tramp over the farm. + They fell into the habit of visiting the old quarry and pawing + over the fragments in search of fossil specimens. Both of them + had a poetic interest in geology, its infinite remotenesses and + its testimonies. Without scientific knowledge, they took a deep + pleasure in accumulating a collection, which they arranged on + boards torn from an old fence, until they had enough specimens to + fill a small museum. They imagined they could distinguish certain + geological relations and families, and would talk about + trilobites, the Old Red Sandstone period, and the azoic age, or + follow random speculation to far-lying conclusions, developing + vague humors of phrase and fancy, having altogether a joyful good + time. + + Another interest that developed during Goodman's stay was in one + Ruloff, who was under death sentence for a particularly atrocious + murder. The papers were full of Ruloff's prodigious learning. It + was said that he had in preparation a work showing the unity of + all languages. Goodman and Clemens agreed that Ruloff's death + would be a great loss to mankind, even though he was clearly a + villain and deserved his sentence. They decided that justice + would be served just as well if some stupid person were hung in + his place, and following out this fancy Clemens one morning put + aside his regular work and wrote an article to the Tribune, + offering to supply a substitute for Ruloff. He signed it simply + “Samuel Langhorne,” and it was published as a serious + communication, without comment, so far as the Tribune was + concerned. Other papers, however, took it up and it was widely + copied and commented upon. Apparently no one ever identified, + Mark Twain with the authorship of the letter, which, by the way, + does not appear to have prolonged Ruloff's earthly + usefulness.—[The reader will find the Ruloff letter in full under + Appendix K, at the end of last volume.] + + Life at the farm may have furnished agricultural inspiration, for + Clemens wrote something about Horace Greeley's farming, also a + skit concerning Henry Ward Beecher's efforts in that direction. + Of Mr. Beecher's farming he said: + + “His strawberries would be a comfortable success if robins would + eat turnips.” + + The article amused Beecher, and perhaps Greeley was amused too, + for he wrote: + + MARK,—You are mistaken as to my criticisms on your farming. I never + publicly made any, while you have undertaken to tell the exact cost + per pint of my potatoes and cabbages, truly enough the inspiration + of genius. If you will really betake yourself to farming, or even + to telling what you know about it, rather than what you don't know + about mine, I will not only refrain from disparaging criticism, but + will give you my blessing. + Yours, HORACE GREELEY. + + The letter is in Mr. Greeley's characteristic scrawl, and no + doubt furnished inspiration for the turnip story in 'Roughing + It', also the model for the pretended facsimile of Greeley's + writing. + + Altogether that was a busy, enterprising summer at Quarry Farm. + By the middle of May, Clemens wrote to Bliss that he had twelve + hundred manuscript pages of the new book already written, and + that he was turning out the remainder at the rate of from thirty + to sixty-five per day. He was in high spirits by this time. The + family health had improved, and prospects were bright. + + I have enough manuscript on hand now to make (allowing for + engravings) about four hundred pages of the book, consequently am + two-thirds done. I intended to run up to Hartford about the + middle of the week and take it along, but I find myself so + thoroughly interested in my work now (a thing I have not + experienced for months) that I can't bear to lose a single moment + of the inspiration. So I will stay here and peg away as long as + it lasts. My present idea is to write as much more as I have + already written, and then collect from the mass the very best + chapters and discard the rest. When I get it done I want to see + the man who will begin to read it and not finish it. Nothing + grieves me now; nothing troubles me, nothing bothers me or gets + my attention. I don't think of anything but the book, and don't + have an hour's unhappiness about anything, and don't care two + cents whether school keeps or not. The book will be done soon + now. It will be a starchy book; the dedication will be worth the + price of the volume. Thus: + + TO THE LATE CAIN THIS BOOK IS DEDICATED + not on account of respect for his memory, for it merits little + respect; not on account of sympathy for him, for his bloody deed + places him without the pale of sympathy, strictly speaking, but out + of a mere humane commiseration for him, in that it was his + misfortune to live in a dark age that knew not the beneficent + insanity plea. + + Probably Mrs. Clemens diverted this picturesque dedication in + favor of the Higbie inscription, or perhaps the author never + really intended the literary tribute to Cain. The impulse that + inspired it, however, was characteristic. + + In a postscript to this letter he adds: + + My stock is looking up. I am getting the bulliest offers for books + and almanacs; am flooded with lecture invitations, and one + periodical offers me $6,000 cash for twelve articles of any length, + and on any subject, treated humorously or otherwise. + + He set in to make hay while the sun was shining. In addition to + the California book, which was now fast nearing completion, he + discussed a scheme with Goodman for a six-hundred-page work which + they were to do jointly; he planned and wrote one or two scenes + from a Western play, to be built from episodes in the new book + (one of them was the “Arkansas” incident, related in Chapter + XXXI); he perfected one of his several inventions—an + automatically adjusting vest-strap; he wrote a number of + sketches, made an occasional business trip to New York and + Hartford; prospected the latter place for a new home. The shadow + which had hung over the sojourn in Buffalo seemed to have lifted. + + He had promised Bliss some contributions for his new paper, and + in June he sent three sketches. In an accompanying letter he + says: + + Here are three articles which you may have if you will pay $125 for + the lot. If you don't want them I'll sell them to the Galaxy, but + not for a cent less than three times the money.... If you take them + pay one-tenth of the $125 in weekly instalments to Orion till he + has received it all. + + He reconsidered his resolution not to lecture again, and closed + with Redpath for the coming season. He found himself in a + lecture-writing fever. He wrote three of them in succession: one + on Artemus Ward, another on “Reminiscences of Some Pleasant + Characters I Have Met,” and a third one based on chapters from + the new book. Of the “Reminiscence” lecture he wrote Redpath: + + “It covers my whole acquaintance; kings, lunatics, idiots, and + all.” Immediately afterward he wrote that he had prepared still + another lecture, “title to be announced later.” + + “During July I'll decide which one I like best,” he said. He + instructed Redpath not to make engagements for him to lecture in + churches. “I never made a success of a lecture in a church yet. + People are afraid to laugh in a church.” + + Redpath was having difficulties in arranging a circuit to suit + him. Clemens had prejudices against certain towns and localities, + prejudices that were likely to change overnight. In August he + wrote: + + DEAR RED,—I am different from other women; my mind changes oftener. + People who have no mind can easily be stead fast and firm, but when + a man is loaded down to the guards with it, as I am, every heavy + sea of foreboding or inclination, maybe of indolence, shifts the + cargo. See? Therefore, if you will notice, one week I am likely to + give rigid instructions to confine me to New England; the next week + send me to Arizona; the next week withdraw my name; the next week + give you full, untrammeled swing; and the week following modify it. + You must try to keep the run of my mind, Redpath that is your + business, being the agent, and it always was too many for me.... + Now about the West this week, I am willing that you shall retain + all the Western engagements. But what I shall want next week is + still with God. Yours, MARK. + + He was in Hartford when this letter was written, arranging for + residence there and the removal of his belongings. He finally + leased the fine Hooker house on Ford Street, in that pleasant + seclusion known as Nook Farm—the literary part of Hartford, which + included the residence of Charles Dudley Warner and Harriet + Beecher Stowe. He arranged for possession of the premises October + 1st. So the new home was settled upon; then learning that Nasby + was to be in Boston, he ran over to that city for a few days of + recreation after his season's labors. + + Preparations for removal to Hartford were not delayed. The + Buffalo property was disposed of, the furnishings were packed and + shipped away. The house which as bride and groom they had entered + so happily was left empty and deserted, never to be entered by + them again. In the year and a half of their occupancy it had seen + well-nigh all the human round, all that goes to make up the + happiness and the sorrow of life. + + + + + LXXXIII. LECTURING DAYS + + + Life in Hartford, in the autumn of 1871, began in the letter, + rather than in the spirit. The newcomers were received with a + wide, neighborly welcome, but the disorder of establishment and + the almost immediate departure of the head of the household on a + protracted lecturing tour were disquieting things; the atmosphere + of the Clemens home during those early Hartford days gave only a + faint promise of its future loveliness. + + As in a far later period, Mark Twain had resorted to lecturing to + pay off debt. He still owed a portion of his share in the + Express; also he had been obliged to obtain an advance from the + lecture bureau. He dreaded, as always, the tedium of travel, the + clatter of hotel life, the monotony of entertainment, while, more + than most men, he loved the tender luxury of home. It was only + that he could not afford to lose the profit offered on the + platform. + + His season opened at Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, October 16th, and + his schedule carried him hither and thither, to and fro, over + distances that lie between Boston and Chicago. There were + opportunities to run into Hartford now and then, when he was not + too far away, and in November he lectured there on Artemus Ward. + + He changed his entertainment at least twice that season. He began + with the “Reminiscences,” the lecture which he said would treat + of all those whom he had met, “idiots, lunatics, and kings,” but + he did not like it, or it did not go well. He wrote Redpath of + the Artemus Ward address: + + “It suits me, and I'll never deliver the nasty, nauseous + 'Reminiscences' any more.” + + But the Ward lecture was good for little more than a month, for + on December 8th he wrote again: + + Notify all hands that from this time I shall talk nothing but + selections from my forthcoming book, 'Roughing It'. Tried it twice + last night; suits me tiptop. + + And somewhat later: + + Had a splendid time with a splendid audience in Indianapolis last + night; a perfectly jammed house, just as I have all the time out + here.... I don't care now to have any appointments canceled. I'll + even “fetch” those Dutch Pennsylvanians with this lecture. + Have paid up $4,000 indebtedness. You are the last on my list. + Shall begin to pay you in a few days, and then I shall be a free + man again. + + Undoubtedly he reveled in the triumphs of a platform tour, though + at no time did he regard it as a pleasure excursion. During those + early weeks the proofs of his new book, chasing him from place to + place, did not add to his comfort. Still, with large, substantial + rewards in hand and in prospect, one could endure much. + + In the neighborhood of Boston there were other compensations. He + could spend a good part of his days at the Lyceum headquarters, + in School Street, where there was always congenial + fellowship—Nasby, Josh Billings, and the rest of the peripatetic + group that about the end of the year collected there. Their + lectures were never tried immediately in Boston, but in the + outlying towns; tried and perfected—or discarded. When the + provincial audiences were finally satisfied, then the final. test + in the Boston Music Hall was made, and if this proved successful + the rest of the season was safe. Redpath's lecturers put up at + Young's Hotel, and spent their days at the bureau, smoking and + spinning yarns, or talking shop. Early in the evening they + scattered to the outlying towns, Lowell, Lexington, Concord, New + Bedford. There is no such a condition to-day: lecturers are few, + lecture bureaus obscure; there are no great reputations made on + the platform. + + Neither is there any such distinct group of humorists as the one + just mentioned. Humor has become universal since then. Few + writers of this age would confess to taking their work so + seriously as to be at all times unsmiling in it; only about as + many, in fact, as in that day would confess to taking their work + so lightly that they could regard life's sterner phases and + philosophies with a smile. + + Josh Billings was one of the gentlest and loveliest of our + pioneers of laughter. The present generation is not overfamiliar + even with his name, but both the name and sayings of that quaint + soul were on everybody's lips at the time of which we are + writing. His true name was Henry W. Shaw, and he was a genuine, + smiling philosopher, who might have built up a more permanent and + serious reputation had he not been induced to disfigure his + maxims with ridiculous spelling in order to popularize them and + make them bring a living price. It did not matter much with + Nasby's work. An assumed illiteracy belonged with the side of + life which he presented; but it is pathetic now to consider some + of the really masterly sayings of Josh Billings presented in that + uncouth form which was regarded as a part of humor a generation + ago. Even the aphorisms that were essentially humorous lose value + in that degraded spelling. + + “When a man starts down hill everything is greased for the + occasion,” could hardly be improved upon by distorted + orthography, and here are a few more gems which have survived + that deadly blight. + + “Some folks mistake vivacity for wit; whereas the difference + between vivacity and wit is the same as the difference between + the lightning-bug and the lightning.” + + “Don't take the bull by the horns-take him by the tail; then you + can let go when you want to.” + + “The difficulty is not that we know so much, but that we know so + much that isn't so.” + + Josh Billings, Nasby, and Mark Twain were close friends. They had + themselves photographed in a group, and there was always some + pleasantry going on among them. Josh Billings once wrote on + “Lekturing,” and under the head of “Rule Seven,” which treated of + unwisdom of inviting a lecturer to a private house, he said: + + Think of asking Mark Twain home with yu, for instance. Yure good + wife has put her house in apple-pie order for the ockashun; + everything is just in the right place. Yu don't smoke in yure + house, never. Yu don't put yure feet on the center-table, yu don't + skatter the nuzepapers all over the room, in utter confushion: + order and ekonemy governs yure premises. But if yu expeckt Mark + Twain to be happy, or even kumfortable yu hav got to buy a box of + cigars worth at least seventeen dollars and yu hav got to move all + the tender things out ov yure parlor. Yu hav got to skatter all the + latest papers around the room careless, you hav got to hav a + pitcher ov icewater handy, for Mark is a dry humorist. Yu hav got + to ketch and tie all yure yung ones, hed and foot, for Mark luvs + babys only in theory; yu hav got to send yure favorite kat over to + the nabors and hide yure poodle. These are things that hav to be + done, or Mark will pak hiz valise with hiz extry shirt collar and + hiz lektur on the Sandwich Islands, and travel around yure streets, + smoking and reading the sighns over the store doorways untill + lektur time begins. + + As we-are not likely to touch upon Mark Twain's lecturing, save + only lightly, hereafter, it may be as well to say something of + his method at this period. At all places visited by lecturers + there was a committee, and it was the place of the chairman to + introduce the lecturer, a privilege which he valued, because it + gave him a momentary association with distinction and fame. + Clemens was a great disappointment to these officials. He had + learned long ago that he could introduce himself more effectively + than any one else. His usual formula was to present himself as + the chairman of the committee, introducing the lecturer of the + evening; then, with what was in effect a complete change of + personality, to begin his lecture. It was always startling and + amusing, always a success; but the papers finally printed this + formula, which took the freshness out of it, so that he had to + invent others. Sometimes he got up with the frank statement that + he was introducing himself because he had never met any one who + could pay a proper tribute to his talents; but the newspapers + printed that too, and he often rose and began with no + introduction at all. + + Whatever his method of beginning, Mark Twain's procedure probably + was the purest exemplification of the platform entertainer's art + which this country has ever seen. It was the art that makes you + forget the artisanship, the art that made each hearer forget that + he was not being personally entertained by a new and marvelous + friend, who had traveled a long way for his particular benefit. + One listener has written that he sat “simmering with laughter” + through what he supposed was the continuation of the + introduction, waiting for the traditional lecture to begin, when + presently the lecturer, with a bow, disappeared, and it was over. + The listener looked at his watch; he had been there more than an + hour. He thought it could be no more than ten minutes, at most. + Many have tried to set down something of the effect his art + produced on them, but one may not clearly convey the story of a + vanished presence and a silent voice. + + There were other pleasant associations in Boston. Howells was + there, and Aldrich; also Bret Harte, who had finished his + triumphal progress across the continent to join the Atlantic + group. Clemens appears not to have met Aldrich before, though + their acquaintance had begun a year earlier, when Aldrich, as + editor of Every Saturday, had commented on a poem entitled, “The + Three Aces,” which had appeared in the Buffalo Express. Aldrich + had assumed the poem to be the work of Mark Twain, and had + characterized it as “a feeble imitation of Bret Harte's 'Heathen + Chinee.'” Clemens, in a letter, had mildly protested as to the + charge of authorship, and Aldrich had promptly printed the letter + with apologetic explanation. A playful exchange of personal + letters followed, and the beginning of a lifelong friendship. + + One of the letters has a special interest here. Clemens had + followed his protest with an apology for it, asking that no + further notice be taken of the matter. Aldrich replied that it + was too late to prevent “doing him justice,” as his explanation + was already on the press, but that if Clemens insisted he would + withdraw it in the next issue. Clemens then wrote that he did not + want it withdrawn, and explained that he hated to be accused of + plagiarizing Bret Harte, to whom he was deeply indebted for + literary schooling in the California days. Continuing he said: + + Do you know the prettiest fancy and the neatest that ever shot + through Harte's brain? It was this. When they were trying to decide + upon a vignette cover for the Overland a grizzly bear (of the arms + of the State of California) was chosen. Nahl Bros. carved him and + the page was printed with him in it. + As a bear he was a success. He was a good bear, but then, it was + objected, he was an objectless bear—a bear that meant nothing, + signified nothing, simply stood there, snarling over his shoulder + at nothing, and was painfully and manifestly a boorish and + ill-natured intruder upon the fair page. All hands said that none + were satisfied; they hated badly to give him up, and yet they hated + as much to have him there when there was no point to him. But + presently Harte took a pencil and drew two simple lines under his + feet, and behold he was a magnificent success!—the ancient symbol + of California savagery, snarling at the approaching type of high + and progressive civilization, the first Overland locomotive! I just + think that was nothing less than an inspiration.—[The “bear” was + that which has always appeared on the Overland cover; the “two + lines” formed a railway track under his feet. Clemens's original + letter contained crude sketches illustrating these things.] + + Among the Boston group was another Californian, Ralph Keeler, an + eccentric, gifted, and altogether charming fellow, whom Clemens + had known on the Pacific slope. Keeler had been adopted by the + Boston writers, and was grateful and happy accordingly. He was + poor of purse, but inexhaustibly rich in the happier gifts of + fortune. He was unfailingly buoyant, light-hearted, and hopeful. + On an infinitesimal capital he had made a tour of many lands, and + had written of it for the Atlantic. In that charmed circle he was + as overflowingly happy as if he had been admitted to the company + of the gods. Keeler was affectionately regarded by all who knew + him, and he offered a sort of worship in return. He often + accompanied Mark Twain on his lecture engagements to the various + outlying towns, and Clemens brought him back to his hotel for + breakfast, where they had good, enjoyable talks together. Once + Keeler came eagerly to the hotel and made his way up to Clemens's + room. + + “Come with me,” he said. “Quick!” + + “What is it? What's happened?” + + “Don't wait to talk. Come with me.” + + They tramped briskly through the streets till they reached the + public library, entered, Keeler leading the way, not stopping + till he faced a row of shelves filled with books. He pointed at + one of them, his face radiant with joy. + + “Look,” he said. “Do you see it?” + + Clemens looked carefully now and identified one of the books as a + still-born novel which Keeler had published. + + “This is a library,” said Keeler, eagerly, “and they've got it!” + + His whole being was aglow with the wonder of it. He had been + investigating; the library records showed that in the two years + the book had been there it had been taken out and read three + times! It never occurred to Clemens even to smile. Knowing Mark + Twain, one would guess that his eyes were likely to be filled + with tears. + + In his book about Mark Twain, Howells tells of a luncheon which + Keeler gave to his more famous associates—Aldrich, Fields, Harte, + Clemens, and Howells himself—a merry informal occasion. Says + Howells: + + Nothing remains to me of the happy time but a sense of idle and + aimless and joyful talk—play, beginning and ending nowhere, of + eager laughter, of countless good stories from Fields, of a heat- + lightning shimmer of wit from Aldrich, of an occasional + concentration of our joint mockeries upon our host, who took it + gladly; and amid the discourse, so little improving, but so full of + good-fellowship, Bret Harte's leering dramatization of Clemens's + mental attitude toward a symposium of Boston illuminates. “Why, + fellows,” he spluttered, “this is the dream of Mark's life,” and I + remember the glance from under Clemens's feathery eyebrows which + betrayed his enjoyment of the fun. + + Very likely Keeler gave that luncheon in celebration of his + book's triumph; it would be like him. + + Keeler's end was a mystery. The New York Tribune commissioned him + to go to Cuba to report the facts of some Spanish outrages. He + sailed from New York in the steamer, and was last seen alive the + night before the vessel reached Havana. He had made no secret of + his mission, but had discussed it in his frank, innocent way. + There were some Spanish military men on the ship. + + Clemens, commenting on the matter, once said: + + “It may be that he was not flung into the sea, still the belief + was general that that was what had happened.” + + In his book Howells refers to the doubt with which Mark Twain was + then received by the polite culture of Boston; which, on the + other hand, accepted Bret Harte as one of its own, forgiving even + social shortcomings. + + The reason is not difficult to understand. Harte had made his + appeal with legitimate fiction of the kind which, however fresh + in flavor and environment, was of a sort to be measured and + classified. Harte spoke a language they could understand; his + humor, his pathos, his point of view were all recognizable. It + was an art already standardized by a master. It is no reflection + on the genius of Bret Harte to liken his splendid achievements to + those of Charles Dickens. Much of Harte's work is in no way + inferior to that of his great English prototype. Dickens never + wrote a better short story than “The Outcasts of Poker Flats.” He + never wrote as good a short story as “The Luck of Roaring Camp.” + Boston critics promptly realized these things and gave Harte his + correct rating. That they failed to do this with Mark Twain, lay + chiefly in the fact that he spoke to them in new and startling + tongues. His gospels were likely to be heresies; his literary + eccentricities were all unclassified. Of the ultrafastidious set + Howells tells us that Charles Eliot Norton and Prof. Francis J. + Child were about the only ones who accorded him unqualified + approval. The others smiled and enjoyed him, but with that + condescension which the courtier is likely to accord to motley + and the cap and bells. Only the great, simple-hearted, unbiased + multitude, the public, which had no standards but the direct + appeal from one human heart to another, could recognize + immediately his mightier heritage, could exalt and place him on + the throne. + + + + + LXXXIV. “ROUGHING IT”. + + + Telegram to Redpath: + + How in the name of God does a man find his way from here to + Amherst, and when must he start? Give me full particulars, and send + a man with me. If I had another engagement I would rot before I + would fill it. S. L. CLEMENS. + + This was at the end of February, and he believed that he was + standing on the platform for the last time. He loathed the + drudgery of the work, and he considered there was no further + need. He was no longer in debt, and his income he accounted + ample. His new book, 'Roughing It',—[It was Bliss who had given + the new book the title of Roughing It. Innocents at Home had been + its provision title, certainly a misleading one, though it has + been retained in England for the second volume; for what reason + it would be difficult to explain.]—had had a large advance sale, + and its earnings promised to rival those of the 'Innocents'. He + resolved in the future to confine himself to the trade and + profits of authorship. + + The new book had advantages in its favor. Issued early in the + year, it was offered at the best canvassing season; particularly + so, as the author's lectures had prepared the public for its + reception. Furthermore, it dealt with the most picturesque phases + of American life, scenes and episodes vastly interesting at that + time, and peculiarly adapted to Mark Twain's literary expression. + In a different way 'Roughing It' is quite as remarkable as 'The + Innocents Abroad.' If it has less charm, it has greater interest, + and it is by no means without charm. There is something + delicious, for instance, in this bit of pure enjoyment of the + first day's overland travel: + + It was now just dawn, and as we stretched our cramped legs full + length on the mail-sacks, and gazed out through the windows across + the wide wastes of greensward clad in cool, powdery mist to where + there was an expectant look in the Eastern horizon, our perfect + enjoyment took the form of a tranquil and contented ecstasy. The + stage whirled along at a spanking gait, the breeze flapping the + curtains and suspended coats in a most exhilarating way; the cradle + swayed and swung luxuriously, the pattering of the horses' hoofs, + the cracking of the driver's whip, and his “Hi-yi! g'lang!” were + music; the spinning ground and the waltzing trees appeared to give + us a mute hurrah as we went by, and then slack up and look after us + with interest and envy, or something; and as we lay and smoked the + pipe of peace, and compared all this luxury with the years of + tiresome city life that had gone before it, we felt that there was + only one complete and satisfying happiness in the world, and we had + found it. + + Also, there is that lofty presentation of South Pass, and a + picture of the alkali desert, so parching, so withering in its + choking realism, that it makes the throat ache and the tongue dry + to read it. Just a bit of the desert in passing: + + The sun beats down with a dead, blistering, relentless malignity; + the perspiration is welling from every pore in man and beast, but + scarcely a sign of it finds its way to the surface—it is absorbed + before it gets there; there is not the faintest breath of air + stirring; there is not a merciful shred of cloud in all the + brilliant firmament; there is not a living creature visible in any + direction whither one searches the blank level that stretches its + monotonous miles on every hand; there is not a sound, not a sigh, + not a whisper, not a buzz, or a whir of wings, or distant pipe of + bird; not even a sob from the lost souls that doubtless people that + dead air. + + As for the humor of the book, it has been chiefly famous for + that. “Buck Fanshaw's Funeral” has become a classic, and the + purchase of the “Mexican Plug.” But it is to no purpose to review + the book here in detail. We have already reviewed the life and + environment out of which it grew. + + Without doubt the story would have contained more of the poetic + and contemplative, in which he was always at his best, if the + subject itself, as in the Innocents, had lent itself oftener to + this form of writing. It was the lack of that halo perhaps which + caused the new book never quite to rank with its great forerunner + in public favor. There could hardly be any other reason. It + presented a fresher theme; it abounded in humor; technically, it + was better written; seemingly it had all the elements of + popularity and of permanence. It did, in fact, possess these + qualities, but its sales, except during the earlier months of its + canvass, never quite equaled those of The Innocents Abroad. + + 'Roughing It' was accepted by the public for just what it was and + is, a great picture of the Overland Pioneer days—a marvelous + picture of frontier aspects at a time when the frontier itself, + even with its hardships and its tragedies, was little more than a + vast primal joke; when all frontiersmen were obliged to be + laughing philosophers in order to survive the stress of its + warfares. + + A word here about this Western humor: It is a distinct product. + It grew out of a distinct condition—the battle with the frontier. + The fight was so desperate, to take it seriously was to + surrender. Women laughed that they might not weep; men, when they + could no longer swear. “Western humor” was the result. It is the + freshest, wildest humor in the world, but there is tragedy behind + it. + + 'Roughing It' presented the picture of those early conditions + with the startling vividness and truth of a great novel, which, + in effect, it was. It was not accurate history, even of the + author's own adventures. It was true in its aspects, rather than + in its details. The greater artist disregards the truth of detail + to render more strikingly a phase or a condition, to produce an + atmosphere, to reconstruct a vanished time. This was what Mark + Twain did in 'Roughing It'. He told the story of overland travel + and the frontier, for his own and future generations, in what is + essentially a picaresque novel, a work of unperishing fiction, + founded on fact. + + The sales of 'Roughing It' during the first three months + aggregated nearly forty thousand copies, and the author was + lavishly elate accordingly. To Orion (who had already closed his + career with Bliss, by exercise of those hereditary eccentricities + through which he so often came to grief) he gave $1,000 out of + the first royalty check, in acknowledgment of the memorandum book + and other data which Orion had supplied. Clemens believed the new + book would sell one hundred thousand copies within the year; but + the sale diminished presently, and at the end of the first year + it was considerably behind the Innocents for the same period. As + already stated, it required ten years for Roughing It to reach + the one-hundred-thousand mark, which the Innocents reached in + three. + + + + + LXXXV. A BIRTH, A DEATH, AND A VOYAGE + + + The year 1872 was an eventful one in Mark Twain's life. At + Elmira, on March 19th, his second child, a little girl, whom they + named Susan Olivia, was born. On June 2d, in the new home in + Hartford, to which they had recently moved, his first child, a + little boy, Langdon, died. He had never been strong, his wavering + life had often been uncertain, always more of the spirit than the + body, and in Elmira he contracted a heavy cold, or perhaps it was + diphtheria from the beginning. In later years, whenever Clemens + spoke of the little fellow, he never failed to accuse himself of + having been the cause of the child's death. It was Mrs. Clemens's + custom to drive out each morning with Langdon, and once when she + was unable to go Clemens himself went instead. + + “I should not have been permitted to do it,” he said, + remembering. “I was not qualified for any such responsibility as + that. Some one should have gone who had at least the rudiments of + a mind. Necessarily I would lose myself dreaming. After a while + the coachman looked around and noticed that the carriage-robes + had dropped away from the little fellow, and that he was exposed + to the chilly air. He called my attention to it, but it was too + late. Tonsilitis or something of the sort set in, and he did not + get any better, so we took him to Hartford. There it was + pronounced diphtheria, and of course he died.” + + So, with or without reason, he added the blame of another tragedy + to the heavy burden of remorse which he would go on piling up + while he lived. + + The blow was a terrible one to Mrs. Clemens; even the comfort of + the little new baby on her arm could not ease the ache in her + breast. It seemed to her that death was pursuing her. In one of + her letters she says: + + “I feel so often as if my path is to be lined with graves,” and + she expresses the wish that she may drop out of life herself + before her sister and her husband—a wish which the years would + grant. + + They did not return to Elmira, for it was thought that the air of + the shore would be better for the little girl; so they spent the + summer at Saybrook, Connecticut, at Fenwick Hall, leaving Orion + and his wife in charge of the house at Hartford. + + Beyond a few sketches, Clemens did very little literary work that + summer, but he planned a trip to Europe, and he invented what is + still known and sold as the “Mark Twain Scrap-Book.” + + He wrote to Orion of his proposed trip to England, and dilated + upon his scrap-book with considerable enthusiasm. The idea had + grown out of the inconvenience of finding a paste-jar, and the + general mussiness of scrap-book keeping. His new plan was a + self-pasting scrap-book with the gum laid on in narrow strips, + requiring only to be dampened with a sponge or other moist + substance to be ready for the clipping. He states that he intends + to put the invention into the hands of Slote, Woodman & Co., of + whom Dan Slote, his old Quaker City room-mate, was the senior + partner, and have it manufactured for the trade. + + About this time began Mark Twain's long and active interest in + copyright. Previously he had not much considered the subject; he + had taken it for granted there was no step that he could take, + while international piracy was a recognized institution. On both + sides of the water books were appropriated, often without profit, + sometimes even without credit, to the author. To tell the truth, + Clemens had at first regarded it rather in the nature of a + compliment that his books should be thought worth pirating in + England, but as time passed he realized that he was paying + heavily for this recognition. Furthermore, he decided that he was + forfeiting a right; rather that he was being deprived of it: + something which it was in his nature to resent. + + When 'Roughing It' had been ready for issue he agreed with Bliss + that they should try the experiment of copyrighting it in + England, and see how far the law would protect them against the + voracious little publisher, who thus far had not only snapped up + everything bearing Mark Twain's signature, but had included in a + volume of Mark Twain sketches certain examples of very weak humor + with which Mark Twain had been previously unfamiliar. + + Whatever the English pirate's opinion of the copyright protection + of 'Roughing It' may have been, he did not attempt to violate it. + This was gratifying. Clemens came to regard England as a friendly + power. He decided to visit it and spy out the land. He would make + the acquaintance of its people and institutions and write a book, + which would do these things justice. + + He gave out no word of his real purpose. He merely said that he + was going over to see his English publishers, and perhaps to + arrange for a few lectures. He provided himself with some + stylographic note-books, by which he could produce two copies of + his daily memoranda—one for himself and one to mail to Mrs. + Clemens—and sailed on the Scotia August 21, 1872. + + Arriving in Liverpool he took train for London, and presently the + wonderful charm of that old, finished country broke upon him. His + “first hour in England was an hour of delight,” he records; “of + rapture and ecstasy. These are the best words I can find, but + they are not adequate; they are not strong enough to convey the + feeling which this first vision of rural England brought me.” + Then he noticed that the gentleman opposite in his compartment + paid no attention to the scenery, but was absorbed in a + green-covered volume. He was so absorbed in it that, by and by, + Clemens's curiosity was aroused. He shifted his position a little + and his eye caught the title. It was the first volume of the + English edition of The Innocents Abroad. This was gratifying for + a moment; then he remembered that the man had never laughed, + never even smiled during the hour of his steady reading. Clemens + recalled what he had heard of the English lack of humor. He + wondered if this was a fair example of it, and if the man could + be really taking seriously every word he was reading. Clemens + could not look at the scenery any more for watching his + fellow-passenger, waiting with a fascinated interest for the + paragraph that would break up that iron-clad solemnity. It did + not come. During all the rest of the trip to London the + atmosphere of the compartment remained heavy with gloom. + + He drove to the Langham Hotel, always popular with Americans, + established himself, and went to look up his publishers. He found + the Routledges about to sit down to luncheon in a private room, + up-stairs, in their publishing house. He joined them, and not a + soul stirred from that table again until evening. The Routledges + had never heard Mark Twain talk before, never heard any one talk + who in the least resembled him. Various refreshments were served + during the afternoon, came and went, while this marvelous + creature talked on and they listened, reveling, and wondering if + America had any more of that sort at home. By and by dinner was + served; then after a long time, when there was no further excuse + for keeping him there, they took him to the Savage Club, where + there were yet other refreshments and a gathering of the clans to + welcome this new arrival as a being from some remote and + unfamiliar star. + + Tom Hood, the younger, was there, and Harry Lee, and Stanley the + explorer, who had but just returned from finding Livingstone, and + Henry Irving, and many another whose name remains, though the + owners of those names are all dead now, and their laughter and + their good-fellowship are only a part of that intangible fabric + which we call the past.'—[Clemens had first known Stanley as a + newspaper man. “I first met him when he reported a lecture of + mine in St. Louis,” he said once in a conversation where the name + of Stanley was mentioned.] + + + + + LXXXVI. ENGLAND + + + From that night Mark Twain's stay in England could not properly + be called a gloomy one. + + Routledge, Hood, Lee, and, in fact, all literary London, set + themselves the task of giving him a good time. Whatever place of + interest they could think of he was taken there; whatever there + was to see he saw it. Dinners, receptions, and assemblies were + not complete without him. The White Friars' Club and others gave + banquets in his honor. He was the sensation of the day. When he + rose to speak on these occasions he was greeted with wild cheers. + Whatever he said they eagerly applauded—too eagerly sometimes, in + the fear that they might be regarded as insensible to American + humor. Other speakers delighted in chaffing him in order to + provoke his retorts. When a speaker humorously referred to his + American habit of carrying a cotton umbrella, his reply that he + followed this custom because a cotton umbrella was the only kind + of an umbrella that an Englishman wouldn't steal, was all over + England next day, and regarded as one of the finest examples of + wit since the days of Swift. + + The suddenness and completeness of his acceptance by the great + ones of London rather overwhelmed and frightened him made him + timid. Joaquin Miller writes: + + He was shy as a girl, although time was already coyly flirting + white flowers at his temples, and could hardly be coaxed to meet + the learned and great who wanted to take him by the hand. + + Many came to call on him at his hotel, among them Charles Reade + and Canon Kingsley. Kingsley came twice without finding him; then + wrote, asking for an appointment. Reade invited his assistance on + a novel. Indeed, it was in England that Mark Twain was first made + to feel that he had come into his rightful heritage. Whatever may + have been the doubts concerning him in America, there was no + question in England. Howells says: + + In England rank, fashion, and culture rejoiced in him. Lord mayors, + lord chief justices, and magnates of many kinds were his hosts; he + was desired in country houses, and his bold genius captivated the + favor of periodicals which spurned the rest of our nation. + + After that first visit of Mark Twain's, when Americans in + England, referring to their great statesmen, authors, and the + like, naturally mentioned the names of Seward, Webster, Lowell, + or Holmes, the English comment was likely to be: “Never mind + those. We can turn out academic Sewards by the dozen, and + cultured humorists like Lowell and Holmes by the score. Tell us + of Lincoln, Artemus Ward, and Mark Twain. We cannot match these; + they interest us.” And it was true. History could not match them, + for they were unique. + + Clemens would have been more than human if in time he had not + realized the fuller meaning of this triumph, and exulted in it a + little to the folks at home. There never lived a more modest, + less pretentious, less aggressive man than Mark Twain, but there + never lived a man who took a more childlike delight in genuine + appreciation; and, being childlike, it was only human that he + should wish those nearest to him to share his happiness. After + one memorable affair he wrote: + + I have been received in a sort of tremendous way to-night by the + brains of London, assembled at the annual dinner of the sheriffs of + London; mine being (between you and me) a name which was received + with a thundering outburst of spontaneous applause when the long + list of guests was called. + + I might have perished on the spot but for the friendly support + and assistance of my excellent friend, Sir John Bennett. + + This letter does not tell all of the incident or the real reason + why he might have perished on the spot. During the long roll-call + of guests he had lost interest a little, and was conversing in + whispers with his “excellent friend,” Sir John Bennett, stopping + to applaud now and then when the applause of the others indicated + that some distinguished name had been pronounced. All at once the + applause broke out with great vehemence. This must be some very + distinguished person indeed. He joined in it with great + enthusiasm. When it was over he whispered to Sir John: + + “Whose name was that we were just applauding?” + + “Mark Twain's.” + + Whereupon the support was needed. + + Poor little pirate Hotten did not have a happy time during this + visit. He had reveled in the prospect at first, for he + anticipated a large increase to be derived from his purloined + property; but suddenly, one morning, he was aghast to find in the + Spectator a signed letter from Mark Twain, in which he was + repudiated, referred to as “John Camden Hottentot,” an unsavory + person generally. Hotten also sent a letter to the Spectator, in + which he attempted to justify himself, but it was a feeble + performance. Clemens prepared two other communications, each + worse than the other and both more destructive than the first + one. But these were only to relieve his mind. He did not print + them. In one of them he pursued the fancy of John Camden + Hottentot, whom he offers as a specimen to the Zoological + Gardens. + + It is not a bird. It is not a man. It is not a fish. It does not + seem to be in all respects a reptile. It has the body and + features of a man, but scarcely any of the instincts that belong + to such a structure.... I am sure that this singular little + creature is the missing link between the man and the hyena. + + Hotten had preyed upon explorer Stanley and libeled him in a + so-called. biography to a degree that had really aroused some + feeling against Stanley in England. Only for the moment—the Queen + invited Stanley to luncheon, and newspaper criticism ceased. + Hotten was in general disrepute, therefore, so it was not worth + while throwing a second brick at him. + + In fact, now that Clemens had expended his venom, on paper, + Hotten seemed to him rather an amusing figure than otherwise. An + incident grew out of it all, however, that was not amusing. E. P. + Hingston, whom the reader may remember as having been with + Artemus Ward in Virginia City, and one of that happy group that + wined and dined the year away, had been engaged by Hotten to + write the introductory to his edition of The Innocents Abroad. It + was a well-written, highly complimentary appreciation. Hingston + did not dream that he was committing an offense, nor did Clemens + himself regard it as such in the beginning. + + But Mark Twain's views had undergone a radical change, and with + characteristic dismissal of previous conditions he had forgotten + that he had ever had any other views than those he now held. + Hingston was in London, and one evening, at a gathering, + approached Clemens with outstretched hand. But Clemens failed to + see Hingston's hand or to recognize him. In after-years his + conscience hurt him terribly for this. He remembered it only with + remorse and shame. Once, in his old age, he spoke of it with deep + sorrow. + + + + + LXXXVII. THE BOOK THAT WAS NEVER WRITTEN + + + The book on England, which he had prepared for so carefully, was + never written. Hundreds of the stylographic pages were filled, + and the duplicates sent home for the entertainment of Olivia + Clemens, but the notes were not completed, and the actual writing + was never begun. There was too much sociability in London for one + thing, and then he found that he could not write entertainingly + of England without introducing too many personalities, and + running the risk of offending those who had taken him into their + hearts and homes. In a word, he would have to write too seriously + or not at all. + + He began his memoranda industriously enough, and the volume might + have been as charming and as valuable as any he has left behind. + The reader will hardly fail to find a few of the entries + interesting. They are offered here as examples of his daily + observation during those early weeks of his stay, and to show + somewhat of his purpose: + + AN EXPATRIATE + There was once an American thief who fled his country and took + refuge in England. He dressed himself after the fashion of the + Londoners, and taught his tongue the peculiarities of the London + pronunciation and did his best in all ways to pass himself for a + native. But he did two fatal things: he stopped at the Langham + Hotel, and the first trip he took was to visit Stratford-on-Avon + and the grave of Shakespeare. These things betrayed his + nationality. + STANLEY AND THE QUEEN + See the power a monarch wields! When I arrived here, two weeks ago, + the papers and geographers were in a fair way to eat poor Stanley + up without salt or sauce. The Queen says, “Come four hundred miles + up into Scotland and sit at my luncheon-table fifteen minutes”; + which, being translated, means, “Gentlemen, I believe in this man + and take him under my protection”; and not another yelp is heard. + AT THE BRITISH MUSEUM + What a place it is! + Mention some very rare curiosity of a peculiar nature—a something + which you have read about somewhere but never seen—they show you a + dozen! They show you all the possible varieties of that thing! They + show you curiously wrought jeweled necklaces of beaten gold, worn + by the ancient Egyptians, Assyrians, Etruscans, Greeks, + Britons—every people of the forgotten ages, indeed. They show you + the ornaments of all the tribes and peoples that live or ever did + live. Then they show you a cast taken from Cromwell's face in + death; then the venerable vase that once contained the ashes of + Xerxes. + I am wonderfully thankful for the British Museum. Nobody comes + bothering around me—nobody elbows me—all the room and all the light + I want, under this huge dome—no disturbing noises—and people + standing ready to bring me a copy of pretty much any book that ever + was printed under the sun—and if I choose to go wandering about the + long corridors and galleries of the great building the secrets of + all the earth and all the ages axe laid open to me. I am not + capable of expressing my gratitude for the British Museum—it seems + as if I do not know any but little words and weak ones. + WESTMINSTER ABBEY BY NIGHT + It was past eleven o'clock and I was just going to bed. But this + friend of mine was as reliable as he was eccentric, and so there + was not a doubt in my mind that his “expedition” had merit in it. I + put on my coat and boots again, and we drove away. + “Where is it? Where are we going?” + “Don't worry. You'll see.” + He was not inclined to talk. So I thought this must be a weighty + matter. My curiosity grew with the minutes, but I kept it manfully + under the surface. I watched the lamps, the signs, the numbers as + we thundered down the long street. I am always lost in London, day + or night. It was very chilly, almost bleak. People leaned against + the gusty blasts as if it were the dead of winter. The crowds grew + thinner and thinner, and the noises waxed faint and seemed far + away. The sky was overcast and threatening. We drove on, and still + on, till I wondered if we were ever going to stop. At last we + passed by a spacious bridge and a vast building, and presently + entered a gateway, passed through a sort of tunnel, and stopped in + a court surrounded by the black outlines of a great edifice. Then + we alighted, walked a dozen steps or so, and waited. In a little + while footsteps were heard, a man emerged from the darkness, and we + dropped into his wake without saying anything. He led us under an + archway of masonry, and from that into a roomy tunnel, through a + tall iron gate, which he locked behind us. We followed him down + this tunnel, guided more by his footsteps on the stone flagging + than by anything we could very distinctly see. At the end of it we + came to another iron gate, and our conductor stopped there and lit + a bull's-eye lantern. Then he unlocked the gate; and I wished he + had oiled it first, it grated so dismally. The gate swung open and + we stood on the threshold of what seemed a limitless domed and + pillared cavern, carved out of the solid darkness. The conductor + and my friend took off their hats reverently, and I did likewise. + For the moment that we stood thus there was not a sound, and the + stillness seemed to add to the solemnity of the gloom. I looked my + inquiry! + “It is the tomb of the great dead of England-Westminster Abbey.”... + We were among the tombs; on every hand dull shapes of men, sitting, + standing, or stooping, inspected us curiously out of the darkness + —reached out their hands toward us—some appealing, some beckoning, + some warning us away. Effigies they were—statues over the graves; + but they looked human and natural in the murky shadows. Now a + little half-grown black and white cat squeezed herself through the + bars of the iron gate and came purring lovingly about us, unawed by + the time or the place, unimpressed by the marble pomp that + sepulchers a line of mighty dead that ends with a great author of + yesterday and began with a sceptered monarch away back in the dawn + of history, more than twelve hundred years ago.... + Mr. Wright flashed his lantern first upon this object and then upon + that, and kept up a running commentary that showed there was + nothing about the venerable Abbey that was trivial in his eyes or + void of interest. He is a man in authority, being superintendent, + and his daily business keeps him familiar with every nook and + corner of the great pile. Casting a luminous ray now here, now + yonder, he would say: + “Observe the height of the Abbey—one hundred and three feet to the + base of the roof; I measured it myself the other day. Notice the + base of this column—old, very old—hundreds and hundreds of years + —and how well they knew how to build in those old days! Notice it + —every stone is laid horizontally; that is to say, just as nature + laid it originally in the quarry not set up edgewise; in our day + some people set them on edge, and then wonder why they split and + flake. Architects cannot teach nature anything. Let me remove this + matting—it is put here to preserve the pavement; now there is a bit + of pavement that is seven hundred years old; you can see by these + scattering clusters of colored mosaics how beautiful it was before + time and sacrilegious idlers marred it. Now there, in the border, + was an inscription, once see, follow the circle-you can trace it by + the ornaments that have been pulled out—here is an A and there is + an O, and yonder another A—all beautiful Old English capitals; + there is no telling what the inscription was—no record left now. + Now move along in this direction, if you please. Yonder is where + old King Sebert the Saxon lies his monument is the oldest one in + the Abbey; Sebert died in 616,—[Clemens probably misunderstood the + name. It was Ethelbert who died in 616. The name Sebert does not + appear in any Saxon annals accessible to the author.]—and that's as + much, as twelve hundred and fifty years ago think of it! Twelve + hundred and fifty years! Now yonder is the last one—Charles + Dickens—there on the floor, with the brass letters on the slab—and + to this day the people come and put flowers on it.... There is + Garrick's monument; and Addison's, and Thackeray's bust—and + Macaulay lies there. And close to Dickens and Garrick lie Sheridan + and Dr. Johnson—and here is old Parr.... + “That stone there covers Campbell the poet. Here are names you know + pretty well—Milton, and Gray who wrote the Elegy, and Butler who + wrote Hudibras; and Edmund Spenser, and Ben Jonson—there are three + tablets to him scattered about the Abbey, and all got 'O, Rare Ben + Jonson' cut on them. You were standing on one of them just now he + is buried standing up. There used to be a tradition here that + explains it. The story goes that he did not dare ask to be buried + in the Abbey, so he asked King James if he would make him a present + of eighteen inches of English ground, and the King said 'yes,' and + asked him where he would have it, and he said in Westminster Abbey. + Well, the King wouldn't go back on his word, and so there he is, + sure enough-stood up on end.” + + The reader may regret that there are not more of these entries, + and that the book itself was never written. Just when he gave up + the project is not recorded. He was urged to lecture in London, + but declined. To Mrs. Clemens, in September, he wrote: + + Everybody says lecture, lecture, lecture, but I have not the + least idea of doing it; certainly not at present. Mr. Dolby, who + took Dickens to America, is coming to talk business tomorrow, + though I have sent him word once before that I can't be hired to + talk here; because I have no time to spare. There is too much + sociability; I do not get along fast enough with work. + + In October he declared that he was very homesick, and proposed + that Mrs. Clemens and Susie join him at once in London, unless + she would prefer to have him come home for the winter and all of + them return to London in the spring. So it is likely that the + book was not then abandoned. He felt that his visit was by no + means ended; that it was, in fact, only just begun, but he wanted + the ones he loved most to share it with him. To his mother and + sister, in November, he wrote: + + I came here to take notes for a book, but I haven't done much but + attend dinners and make speeches. I have had a jolly good time, + and I do hate to go away from these English folks; they make a + stranger feel entirely at home, and they laugh so easily that it + is a comfort to make after-dinner speeches here. I have made + hundreds of friends; and last night, in the crush at the opening + of the new Guild Hall Library and Museum, I was surprised to meet + a familiar face every other step. + + All his impressions of England had been happy ones. He could + deliver a gentle satire now and then at certain British + institutions—certain London localities and features—as in his + speech at the Savage Club,—[September 28, 1872. This is probably + the most characteristic speech made by Mark Twain during his + first London visit; the reader will find it in full in Appendix + L, at the end of last volume.]—but taking the snug island as a + whole, its people, its institutions, its fair, rural aspects, he + had found in it only delight. To Mrs. Crane he wrote: + + If you and Theodore will come over in the spring with Livy and me, + and spend the summer, you shall see a country that is so beautiful + that you will be obliged to believe in fairy-land. There is nothing + like it elsewhere on the globe. You should have a season ticket and + travel up and down every day between London and Oxford and worship + nature. + And Theodore can browse with me among dusty old dens that look now + as they looked five hundred years ago; and puzzle over books in the + British Museum that were made before Christ was born; and in the + customs of their public dinners, and the ceremonies of every + official act, and the dresses of a thousand dignitaries, trace the + speech and manners of all the centuries that have dragged their + lagging decades over England since the Heptarchy fell asunder. I + would a good deal rather live here if I could get the rest of you + over. + + He sailed November 12th, on the Batavia, loaded with Christmas + presents for everybody; jewelry, furs, laces; also a practical + steam-engine for his namesake, Sam Moffett. Half-way across the + Atlantic the Batavia ran into a hurricane and was badly damaged + by heavy seas, and driven far out of her course. It was a lucky + event on the whole, for she fell in with a water-logged lumber + bark, a complete wreck, with nine surviving sailors clinging to + her rigging. In the midst of the wild gale a lifeboat was + launched and the perishing men were rescued. Clemens prepared a + graphic report of the matter for the Royal Humane Society, asking + that medals be conferred upon the brave rescuers, a document that + was signed by his fellow-passengers and obtained for the men + complete recognition and wide celebrity. Closing, the writer + said: + + As might have been anticipated, if I have been of any service + toward rescuing these nine shipwrecked human beings by standing + around the deck in a furious storm, without an umbrella, keeping an + eye on things and seeing that they were done right, and yelling + whenever a cheer seemed to be the important thing, I am glad and I + am satisfied. I ask no reward. I would do it again under the same + circumstances. But what I do plead for, earnestly and sincerely, is + that the Royal Humane Society will remember our captain and our + life-boat crew, and in so remembering them increase the high honor + and esteem in which the society is held all over the civilized + world. + + The Batavia reached New York November 26, 1872. Mark Twain had + been absent three months, during which he had been brought to at + least a partial realization of what his work meant to him and to + mankind. + + An election had taken place during his absence—an election which + gratified him deeply, for it had resulted in the second + presidency of General Grant and in the defeat of Horace Greeley, + whom he admired perhaps, but not as presidential material. To + Thomas Nast, who had aided very effectually in Mr. Greeley's + overwhelming defeat, Clemens wrote: + + Nast, you more than any other man have won a prodigious victory + for Grant—I mean, rather, for civilization and progress. Those + pictures were simply marvelous, and if any man in the land has a + right to hold his head up and be honestly proud of his share in + this year's vast events that man is unquestionably yourself. We + all do sincerely honor you, and are proud of you. + + Horace Greeley's peculiar abilities and eccentricities won + celebrity for him, rather than voters. Mark Twain once said of + him: + + “He was a great man, an honest man, and served his, country well + and was an honor to it. Also, he was a good-natured man, but + abrupt with strangers if they annoyed him when he was busy. He + was profane, but that is nothing; the best of us is that. I did + not know him well, but only just casually, and by accident. I + never met him but once. I called on him in the Tribune office, + but I was not intending to. I was looking for Whitelaw Reid, and + got into the wrong den. He was alone at his desk, writing, and we + conversed—not long, but just a little. I asked him if he was + well, and he said, 'What the hell do you want?' Well, I couldn't + remember what I wanted, so I said I would call again. But I + didn't.” + + Clemens did not always tell the incident just in this way. + Sometimes it was John Hay he was looking for instead of Reid, and + the conversation with Greeley varied; but perhaps there was a + germ of history under it somewhere, and at any rate it could have + happened well enough, and not have been out of character with + either of the men. + + + + + LXXXVIII. “THE GILDED AGE” + + + Mark Twain did not go on the lecture circuit that winter. Redpath + had besought him as usual, and even in midsummer had written: + + “Will you? Won't you? We have seven thousand to eight thousand + dollars in engagements recorded for you,” and he named a list of + towns ranging geographically from Boston to St. Paul. + + But Clemens had no intention then of ever lecturing any more, and + again in November, from London, he announced (to Redpath): + + “When I yell again for less than $500 I'll be pretty hungry, but + I haven't any intention of yelling at any price.” + + Redpath pursued him, and in January proposed $400 for a single + night in Philadelphia, but without result. He did lecture two + nights in Steinway Hall for the Mercantile Library Association, + on the basis of half profits, netting $1,300 for the two nights + as his share; and he lectured one night in Hartford, at a profit + Of $1,500, for charity. Father Hawley, of Hartford, had announced + that his missionary work was suffering for lack of funds. Some of + his people were actually without food, he said, their children + crying with hunger. No one ever responded to an appeal like that + quicker than Samuel Clemens. He offered to deliver a lecture + free, and to bear an equal proportion of whatever expenses were + incurred by the committee of eight who agreed to join in + forwarding the project. He gave the Sandwich Island lecture, and + at the close of it a large card was handed him with the figures + of the receipts printed upon it. It was held up to view, and the + house broke into a storm of cheers. + + He did very little writing during the early weeks following his + return. Early in the year (January 3 and 6, 1873) he contributed + two Sandwich Island letters to the Tribune, in which, in his own + peculiar fashion, he urged annexation. + + “We must annex those people,” he declared, and proceeded to + specify the blessings we could give them, such as “leather-headed + juries, the insanity law, and the Tweed Ring.” + + We can confer Woodhull and Clafin on them, and George Francis + Train. We can give them lecturers! I will go myself. + We can make that little bunch of sleepy islands the hottest corner + on earth, and array it in the moral splendor of our high and holy + civilization. Annexation is what the poor islanders need! + “Shall we, to men benighted, the lamp of life deny?” + + His success in England became an incentive to certain American + institutions to recognize his gifts at home. Early in the year he + was dined as the guest of the Lotos Club of New York, and a week + or two later elected to its membership. This was but a beginning. + Some new membership or honor was offered every little while, and + so many banquets that he finally invented a set form for + declining them. He was not yet recognized as the foremost + American man of letters, but undoubtedly he had become the most + popular; and Edwin Whipple, writing at this time, or but little + later, said: + + “Mark Twain is regarded chiefly as a humorist, but the exercise + of his real talents would rank him with the ablest of our authors + in the past fifty years.” So he was beginning to be “discovered” + in high places. + + It was during this winter that the Clemens household enjoyed its + first real home life in Hartford, its first real home life + anywhere since those earliest days of marriage. The Hooker + mansion was a comfortable place. The little family had + comparatively good health. Their old friends were stanch and + lavishly warm-hearted, and they had added many new ones. Their + fireside was a delightful nucleus around which gathered those + they cared for most, the Twichells, the Warner families, the + Trumbulls—all certain of a welcome there. George Warner, only a + little while ago, remembering, said: + + “The Clemens house was the only one I have ever known where there + was never any preoccupation in the evenings, and where visitors + were always welcome. Clemens was the best kind of a host; his + evenings after dinner were an unending flow of stories.” + + Friends living near by usually came and went at will, often + without the ceremony of knocking or formal leave-taking. They + were more like one great family in that neighborhood, with a + community of interests, a unity of ideals. The Warner families + and the Clemenses were particularly intimate, and out of their + association grew Mark Twain's next important literary + undertaking, his collaboration with Charles Dudley Warner in 'The + Gilded Age'. + + A number of more or less absurd stories have been printed about + the origin of this book. It was a very simple matter, a perfectly + natural development. + + At the dinner-table one night, with the Warners present, + criticisms of recent novels were offered, with the usual freedom + and severity of dinner-table talk. The husbands were inclined to + treat rather lightly the novels in which their wives were finding + entertainment. The wives naturally retorted that the proper thing + for the husbands to do was to furnish the American people with + better ones. This was regarded in the nature of a challenge, and + as such was accepted—mutually accepted: that is to say, in + partnership. On the spur of the moment Clemens and Warner agreed + that they would do a novel together, that they would begin it + immediately. This is the whole story of the book's origin; so + far, at least, as the collaboration is concerned. Clemens, in + fact, had the beginning of a story in his mind, but had been + unwilling to undertake an extended work of fiction alone. He + welcomed only too eagerly, therefore, the proposition of joint + authorship. His purpose was to write a tale around that lovable + character of his youth, his mother's cousin, James Lampton—to let + that gentle visionary stand as the central figure against a + proper background. The idea appealed to Warner, and there was no + delay in the beginning. Clemens immediately set to work and + completed 399 pages of the manuscript, the first eleven chapters + of the book, before the early flush of enthusiasm waned. + + Warner came over then, and Clemens read it aloud to him. Warner + had some plans for the story, and took it up at this point, and + continued it through the next twelve chapters; and so they worked + alternately, “in the superstition,” as Mark Twain long afterward + declared, “that we were writing one coherent yarn, when I + suppose, as a matter of fact, we were writing two incoherent + ones.”—[The reader may be interested in the division of labor. + Clemens wrote chapters I to XI; also chapters XXIV, XXV, XXVII, + XXVIII, XXX, XXXII, XXXIII, XXXIV, XXXVI, XXXVII, XLII, XLIII, + XLV, LI, LII, LIII, LVII, LIX, LX, LXI, LXII, and portions of + chapters XXXV, XLIX, LVI. Warner wrote chapters XII to XXIII; + also chapters XXVI, XXIX, XXXI, XXXVIII, XXXIX, XL, XLI, XLIV, + XLVI, XLVII, XLVIII, L, LIV, LV, LVIII, LXIII, and portions of + chapters XXXV, XLIX, and LVI. The work was therefore very evenly + divided. + + There was another co-worker on The Gilded Age before the book was + finally completed. This was J. Hammond Trumbull, who prepared the + variegated, marvelous cryptographic chapter headings: Trumbull + was the most learned man that ever lived in Hartford. He was + familiar with all literary and scientific data, and according to + Clemens could swear in twenty-seven languages. It was thought to + be a choice idea to get Trumbull to supply a lingual medley of + quotations to precede the chapters in the new book, the purpose + being to excite interest and possibly to amuse the reader—a + purpose which to some extent appears to have miscarried.] + + The book was begun in February and finished in April, so the work + did not lag. The result, if not highly artistic, made + astonishingly good reading. Warner had the touch of romance, + Clemens, the gift of creating, or at least of portraying, human + realities. Most of his characters reflected intimate + personalities of his early life. Besides the apotheosis of James + Lampton into the immortal Sellers, Orion became Washington + Hawkins, Squire Clemens the judge, while Mark Twain's own + personality, in a greater or lesser degree, is reflected in most + of his creations. As for the Tennessee land, so long a + will-o'the-wisp and a bugbear, it became tangible property at + last. Only a year or two before Clemens had written to Orion: + + Oh, here! I don't want to be consulted at all about Tennessee. I + don't want it even mentioned to me. When I make a suggestion it is + for you to act upon it or throw it aside, but I beseech you never + to ask my advice, opinion, or consent about that hated property. + + But it came in good play now. It is the important theme of the + story. + + Mark Twain was well qualified to construct his share of the tale. + He knew his characters, their lives, and their atmospheres + perfectly. Senator Dilworthy (otherwise Senator Pomeroy, of + Kansas, then notorious for attempted vote-buying) was familiar + enough. That winter in Washington had acquainted Clemens with the + life there, its political intrigues, and the disrepute of + Congress. Warner was equally well qualified for his share of the + undertaking, and the chief criticism that one may offer is the + one stated by Clemens himself—that the divisions of the tale + remain divisions rather than unity. + + As for the story itself—the romance and tragedy of it—the + character of Laura in the hands of either author is one not easy + to forget. Whether this means that the work is well done, or only + strikingly done, the reader himself must judge. Morally, the + character is not justified. Laura was a victim of circumstance + from the beginning. There could be no poetic justice in her doom. + To drag her out of a steamer wreck, only to make her the victim + of a scoundrel, later an adventuress, and finally a murderess, + all may be good art, but of a very bad kind. Laura is a sort of + American Becky Sharp; but there is retributive justice in Becky's + fate, whereas Laura's doom is warranted only by the author's + whim. As for her end, whatever the virtuous public of that day + might have done, a present-day audience would not have pelted her + from the stage, destroyed her future, taken away her life. + + The authors regarded their work highly when it was finished, but + that is nothing. Any author regards his work highly at the moment + of its completion. In later years neither of them thought very + well of their production; but that also is nothing. The author + seldom cares very deeply for his offspring once it is turned over + to the public charge. The fact that the story is still popular, + still delights thousands of readers, when a myriad of novels that + have been written since it was completed have lived their little + day and died so utterly that even their names have passed out of + memory, is the best verdict as to its worth. + + + + + LXXXIX. PLANNING A NEW HOME + + + Clemens and his wife bought a lot for the new home that winter, a + fine, sightly piece of land on Farmington Avenue—table-land, + sloping down to a pretty stream that wound through the willows + and among the trees. They were as delighted as children with + their new purchase and the prospect of building. To her sister + Mrs. Clemens wrote: + + Mr. Clemens seems to glory in his sense of possession; he goes + daily into the lot, has had several falls trying to lay off the + land by sliding around on his feet.... + For three days the ice has covered the trees, and they have been + glorious. We could do nothing but watch the beauty outside; if you + looked at the trees as the sun struck them, with your back toward + the sun, they were covered with jewels. If you looked toward the + sun it was all crystal whiteness, a perfect fairy-land. Then the + nights were moonlight, and that was a great beauty, the moon giving + us the same prismatic effect. + + This was the storm of which Mark Twain wrote his matchless + description, given first in his speech on New England weather, + and later preserved in 'Following the Equator', in more extended + form. In that book he likens an ice-storm to his impressions + derived from reading descriptions of the Taj Mahal, that + wonderful tomb of a fair East Indian queen. It is a marvelous bit + of word-painting—his description of that majestic vision: “When + every bough and twig is strung with ice-beads, frozen dewdrops, + and the whole tree sparkles cold and white, like the Shah of + Persia's diamond plume.” It will pay any one to look up that + description and read it all, though it has been said, by the + fortunate one or two who heard him first give it utterance as an + impromptu outburst, that in the subsequent process of writing the + bloom of its original magnificence was lost. + + The plans for the new house were drawn forthwith by that gentle + architect Edward Potter, whose art to-day may be considered open + to criticism, but not because of any lack of originality. + Hartford houses of that period were mainly of the goods-box form + of architecture, perfectly square, typifying the commercial + pursuits of many of their owners. Potter agreed to get away from + this idea, and a radical and even frenzied departure was the + result. Certainly his plans presented beautiful pictures, and all + who saw them were filled with wonder and delight. Architecture + has lavished itself in many florescent forms since then, but we + may imagine that Potter's “English violet” order of design, as he + himself designated it, startled, dazzled, and captivated in a + day, when most houses were mere habitations, built with a view to + economy and the largest possible amount of room. + + Workmen were put on the ground without delay, to prepare for the + builders, and work was rapidly pushed along. Then in May the + whole matter was left in the hands of the architect and the + carpenters (with Lawyer Charles E. Perkins to stand between + Potter and the violent builder, who roared at Potter and + frightened him when he wanted changes), while the Clemens + household, with Clara Spaulding, a girlhood friend of Mrs. + Clemens, sailed away to England for a half-year holiday. + + + + + XC. A LONG ENGLISH HOLIDAY + + + They sailed on the Batavia, and with them went a young man named + Thompson, a theological student whom Clemens had consented to + take as an amanuensis. There is a pathetic incident connected + with this young man, and it may as well be set down here. Clemens + found, a few weeks after his arrival in England, that so great + was the tax upon his time that he could make no use of Thompson's + services. He gave Thompson fifty dollars, and upon the + possibility of the young man's desiring to return to America, + advanced him another fifty dollars, saying that he could return + it some day, and never thought of it again. But the young man + remembered it, and one day, thirty-six years later, after a life + of hardship and struggle, such as the life of a country minister + is apt to be, he wrote and inclosed a money-order, a payment on + his debt. That letter and its inclosure brought only sorrow to + Mark Twain. He felt that it laid upon him the accumulated burden + of the weary thirty-six years' struggle with ill-fortune. He + returned the money, of course, and in a biographical note + commented: + + How pale painted heroisms of romance look beside it! Thompson's + heroism, which is real, which is colossal, which is sublime, and + which is costly beyond all estimate, is achieved in profound + obscurity, and its hero walks in rags to the end of his days. I had + forgotten Thompson completely, but he flashes before me as vividly + as lightning. I can see him now. It was on the deck of the Batavia, + in the dock. The ship was casting off, with that hubbub and + confusion and rushing of sailors, and shouting of orders and + shrieking of boatswain whistles, which marked the departure + preparations in those days—an impressive contrast with the solemn + silence which marks the departure preparations of the giant ships + of the present day. Mrs. Clemens, Clara Spaulding, little Susy, and + the nurse-maid were all properly garbed for the occasion. We all + had on our storm-rig, heavy clothes of somber hue, but new and + designed and constructed for the purpose, strictly in accordance + with sea-going etiquette; anything wearable on land being + distinctly and odiously out of the question. + Very well. On that deck, and gliding placidly among those honorable + and properly upholstered groups, appeared Thompson, young, grave, + long, slim, with an aged fuzzy plug hat towering high on the upper + end of him and followed by a gray duster, which flowed down, + without break or wrinkle, to his ankles. He came straight to us, + and shook hands and compromised us. Everybody could see that we + knew him. A nigger in heaven could not have created a profounder + astonishment. + However, Thompson didn't know that anything was happening. He had + no prejudices about clothes. I can still see him as he looked when + we passed Sandy Hook and the winds of the big ocean smote us. + Erect, lofty, and grand he stood facing the blast, holding his plug + on with both hands and his generous duster blowing out behind, + level with his neck. There were scoffers observing, but he didn't + know it; he wasn't disturbed. + In my mind, I see him once afterward, clothed as before, taking me + down in shorthand. The Shah of Persia had come to England and Dr. + Hosmer, of the Herald, had sent me to Ostend, to view his Majesty's + progress across the Channel and write an account of it. I can't + recall Thompson after that, and I wish his memory had been as poor + as mine. + + They had been a month in London, when the final incident referred + to took place—the arrival of the Shah of Persia—and were + comfortably quartered at the Langham Hotel. To Twichell Clemens + wrote: + + We have a luxuriously ample suite of apartments on the third floor, + our bedroom looking straight up Portland Place, our parlor having a + noble array of great windows looking out upon both streets + (Portland Place and the crook that joins it onto Regent Street). + Nine p.m. full twilight, rich sunset tints lingering in the west. + I am not going to write anything; rather tell it when I get back. I + love you and Harmony, and that is all the fresh news I've got + anyway. And I mean to keep that fresh all the time. + + Mrs. Clemens, in a letter to her sister, declared: “It is + perfectly discouraging to try to write you. There is so much to + write about that it makes me feel as if it was no use to begin.” + + It was a period of continuous honor and entertainment. If Mark + Twain had been a lion on his first visit, he was little less than + royalty now. His rooms at the Langham were like a court. Miss + Spaulding (now Mrs. John B. Stanchfield) remembers that Robert + Browning, Turgenieff, Sir John Millais, Lord Houghton, and Sir + Charles Dilke (then at the height of his fame) were among those + that called to pay their respects. In a recent letter she says: + + I remember a delightful luncheon that Charles Kingsley gave for Mr. + Clemens; also an evening when Lord Dunraven brought Mr. Home, the + medium, Lord Dunraven telling many of the remarkable things he had + seen Mr. Home do. I remember I wanted so much to see him float out + of a seven or eight story window, and enter another, which Lord + Dunraven said he had seen him do many times. But Mr. Home had been + very ill, and said his power had left him. My great regret was that + we did not see Carlyle, who was too sad and ill for visits. + + Among others they met Lewis Carroll, the author of Alice in + Wonderland, and found him so shy that it was almost impossible to + get him to say a word on any subject. + + “The shyest full-grown man, except Uncle Remus, I ever met,” + Clemens once wrote. “Dr. MacDonald and several other lively + talkers were present, and the talk went briskly on for a couple + of hours, but Carroll sat still all the while, except now and + then when he answered a question.” + + At a dinner given by George Smalley they met Herbert Spencer, and + at a luncheon-party at Lord Houghton's, Sir Arthur Helps, then a + world-wide celebrity. + + Lord Elcho, a large, vigorous man, sat at some distance down the + table. He was talking earnestly about the town of Godalming. It was + a deep, flowing, and inarticulate rumble, but I caught the + Godalming pretty nearly every time it broke free of the rumbling, + and as all the strength was on the first end of the word, it + startled me every time, because it sounded so like swearing. In the + middle of the luncheon Lady Houghton rose, remarked to the guests + on her right and on her left, in a matter-of-fact way, “Excuse me, + I have an engagement,” and without further ceremony, she went off + to meet it. This would have been doubtful etiquette in America. + Lord Houghton told a number of delightful stories. He told them in + French, and I lost nothing of them but the nubs. + + Little Susy and her father thrived on London life, but after a + time it wore on Mrs. Clemens. She delighted in the English + cordiality and culture, but the demands were heavy, the social + forms sometimes trying. Life in London was interesting, and in + its way charming, but she did not enter into it with quite her + husband's enthusiasm and heartiness. In the end they canceled all + London engagements and quietly set out for Scotland. On the way + they rested a few days in York, a venerable place such as Mark + Twain always loved to describe. In a letter to Mrs. Langdon he + wrote: + + For the present we shall remain in this queer old walled town, with + its crooked, narrow lanes, that tell us of their old day that knew + no wheeled vehicles; its plaster-and-timber dwellings, with upper + stories far overhanging the street, and thus marking their date, + say three hundred years ago; the stately city walls, the + castellated gates, the ivy-grown, foliage-sheltered, most noble and + picturesque ruin of St. Mary's Abbey, suggesting their date, say + five hundred years ago, in the heart of Crusading times and the + glory of English chivalry and romance; the vast Cathedral of York, + with its worn carvings and quaintly pictured windows, preaching of + still remoter days; the outlandish names of streets and courts and + byways that stand as a record and a memorial, all these centuries, + of Danish dominion here in still earlier times; the hint here and + there of King Arthur and his knights and their bloody fights with + Saxon oppressors round about this old city more than thirteen + hundred years gone by; and, last of all, the melancholy old stone + coffins and sculptured inscriptions, a venerable arch and a hoary + tower of stone that still remain and are kissed by the sun and + caressed by the shadows every day, just as the sun and the shadows + have kissed and, caressed them every lagging day since the Roman + Emperor's soldiers placed them here in the times when Jesus the Son + of Mary walked the streets of Nazareth a youth, with no more name + or fame than the Yorkshire boy who is loitering down this street + this moment. + + They reached Edinburgh at the end of July and secluded themselves + in Veitch's family hotel in George Street, intending to see no + one. But this plan was not a success; the social stress of London + had been too much for Mrs. Clemens, and she collapsed immediately + after their arrival. Clemens was unacquainted in Edinburgh, but + remembered that Dr. John Brown, who had written Rab and His + Friend, lived there. He learned his address, and that he was + still a practising physician. He walked around to 23 Rutland + Street, and made himself known. Dr. Brown came forthwith, and + Mrs. Clemens speedily recovered under his able and inspiring + treatment. + + The association did not end there. For nearly a month Dr. Brown + was their daily companion, either at the hotel, or in his own + home, or on protracted drives when he made his round of visits, + taking these new friends along. Dr. John was beloved by everybody + in Edinburgh, everybody in Scotland, for that matter, and his + story of Rab had won him a following throughout Christendom. He + was an unpretentious sovereign. Clemens once wrote of him: + + His was a sweet and winning face, as beautiful a face as I have + ever known. Reposeful, gentle, benignant; the face of a saint at + peace with all the world and placidly beaming upon it the sunshine + of love that filled his heart. + + He was the friend of all dogs, and of all people. It has been + told of him that once, when driving, he thrust his head suddenly + out of the carriage window, then resumed his place with a + disappointed look. + + “Who was it?” asked his companion. “Some one you know?” + + “No,” he said. “A dog I don't know.” + + He became the boon companion and playmate of little Susy, then + not quite a year and a half old. He called her Megalopis, a Greek + term, suggested by her eyes; those deep, burning eyes that seemed + always so full of life's sadder philosophies, and impending + tragedy. In a collection of Dr. Brown's letters he refers to this + period. In one place he says: + + Had the author of The Innocents Abroad not come to Edinburgh at + that time we in all human probability might never have met, and + what a deprivation that would have been to me during the last + quarter of a century! + + And in another place: + + I am attending the wife of Mark Twain. His real name is Clemens. + She is a quite lovely little woman, modest and clever, and she has + a girlie eighteen months old, her ludicrous miniature—and such + eyes! + + Those playmates, the good doctor and Megalopis, romped together + through the hotel rooms with that complete abandon which few + grown persons can assume in their play with children, and not all + children can assume in their play with grown-ups. They played + “bear,” and the “bear” (which was a very little one, so little + that when it stood up behind the sofa you could just get a + glimpse of yellow hair) would lie in wait for her victim, and + spring out and surprise him and throw him into frenzies of fear. + + Almost every day they made his professional rounds with him. He + always carried a basket of grapes for his patients. His guests + brought along books to read while they waited. When he stopped + for a call he would say: + + “Entertain yourselves while I go in and reduce the population.” + + There was much sight-seeing to do in Edinburgh, and they could + not quite escape social affairs. There were teas and luncheons + and dinners with the Dunfermlines and the Abercrombies, and the + MacDonalds, and with others of those brave clans that no longer + slew one another among the grim northern crags and glens, but + were as sociable and entertaining lords and ladies as ever the + southland could produce. They were very gentle folk indeed, and + Mrs. Clemens, in future years, found her heart going back oftener + to Edinburgh than to any other haven of those first wanderings. + August 24th she wrote to her sister: + + We leave Edinburgh to-morrow with sincere regret; we have had such + a delightful stay here—we do so regret leaving Dr. Brown and his + sister, thinking that we shall probably never see them again [as + indeed they never did]. + + They spent a day or two at Glasgow and sailed for Ireland, where + they put in a fortnight, and early in September were back in + England again, at Chester, that queer old city where; from a + tower on the wall, Charles I. read the story of his doom. + Reginald Cholmondeley had invited them to visit his country seat, + beautiful Condover Hall, near Shrewsbury, and in that lovely + retreat they spent some happy, restful days. Then they were in + the whirl of London once more, but escaped for a fortnight to + Paris, sight-seeing and making purchases for the new home. + + Mrs. Clemens was quite ready to return to America, by this time. + + I am blue and cross and homesick [she wrote]. I suppose what makes + me feel the latter is because we are contemplating to stay in + London another month. There has not one sheet of Mr. Clemens's + proof come yet, and if he goes home before the book is published + here he will lose his copyright. And then his friends feel that it + will be better for him to lecture in London before his book is + published, not only that it will give him a larger but a more + enviable reputation. I would not hesitate one moment if it were + simply for the money that his copyright will bring him, but if his + reputation will be better for his staying and lecturing, of course + he ought to stay.... The truth is, I can't bear the thought of + postponing going home. + + It is rather gratifying to find Olivia Clemens human, like that, + now and then. Otherwise, on general testimony, one might well be + tempted to regard her as altogether of another race and kind. + + + + + XCI. A LONDON LECTURE + + + Clemens concluded to hasten the homeward journey, but to lecture + a few nights in London before starting. He would then accompany + his little family home, and return at once to continue the + lecture series and protect his copyright. This plan was carried + out. In a communication to the Standard, October 7th, he said: + + SIR,—In view of the prevailing frenzy concerning the Sandwich + Islands, and the inflamed desire of the public to acquire + information concerning them, I have thought it well to tarry yet + another week in England and deliver a lecture upon this absorbing + subject. And lest it should be thought unbecoming in me, a + stranger, to come to the public rescue at such a time, instead of + leaving to abler hands a matter of so much moment, I desire to + explain that I do it with the best motives and the most honorable + intentions. I do it because I am convinced that no one can allay + this unwholesome excitement as effectually as I can, and to allay + it, and allay it as quickly as possible, is surely one thing that + is absolutely necessary at this juncture. I feel and know that I am + equal to this task, for I can allay any kind of an excitement by + lecturing upon it. I have saved many communities in this way. I + have always been able to paralyze the public interest in any topic + that I chose to take hold of and elucidate with all my strength. + Hoping that this explanation will show that if I am seeming to + intrude I am at least doing it from a high impulse, I am, sir, your + obedient servant, MARK TWAIN. + + A day later the following announcement appeared: + + QUEEN'S CONCERT ROOMS, HANOVER SQUARE. + MR. GEORGE DOLBY begs to announce that + MR. MARK TWAIN + WILL DELIVER A LECTURE OF A HUMOROUS CHARACTER, + AS ABOVE, ON MONDAY EVENING NEXT, OCTOBER 13th, + 1873, AND REPEAT IT IN THE SAME PLACE, ON TUESDAY + EVENING, OCTOBER 14th, WEDNESDAY “ “ 15th, + THURSDAY “ “ 16th, FRIDAY “ “ 17th, + At Eight o'Clock, AND SATURDAY AFTERNOON, OCTOBER + 18th, At Three o'Clock. + SUBJECT: “Our Fellow Savages of the Sandwich + Islands.” + As Mr. TWAIN has spent several months in these Islands, and is well + acquainted with his subject, the Lecture may be expected to furnish + matter of interest. + STALLS, 5s. UNRESERVED SEATS, 3s. + + The prospect of a lecture from Mark Twain interested the London + public. Those who had not seen him were willing to pay even for + that privilege. The papers were encouraging; Punch sounded a + characteristic note: + + WELCOME TO A LECTURER + “'Tis time we Twain did show ourselves.” 'Twas said By Caesar, when + one Mark had lost his head: By Mark, whose head's quite bright, 'tis + said again: Therefore, “go with me, friends, to bless this Twain.” + —Punch. + + Dolby had managed the Dickens lectures, and he proved his sound + business judgment and experience by taking the largest available + hall in London for Mark Twain. + + On the evening of October 13th, in the spacious Queen's Concert + Rooms, Hanover Square, Mark Twain delivered his first public + address in England. The subject was “Our Fellow Savages of the + Sandwich Islands,” the old lecture with which he had made his + first great successes. He was not introduced. He appeared on the + platform in evening dress, assuming the character of a manager + announcing a disappointment. + + Mr. Clemens, he said, had fully expected to be present. He paused + and loud murmurs arose from the audience. He lifted his hand and + they subsided. Then he added, “I am happy to say that Mark Twain + is present, and will now give his lecture.” Whereupon the + audience roared its approval. + + It would be hardly an exaggeration to say that his triumph that + week was a regal one. For five successive nights and a Saturday + matinee the culture and fashion of London thronged to hear him + discourse of their “fellow savages.” It was a lecture event + wholly without precedent. The lectures of Artemus Ward,—[“Artemus + the delicious,” as Charles Reade called him, came to London in + June, 1866, and gave his “piece” in Egyptian Hall. The refined, + delicate, intellectual countenance, the sweet, gave, mouth, from + which one might have expected philosophical lectures retained + their seriousness while listeners were convulsed with laughter. + There was something magical about it. Every sentence was a + surprise. He played on his audience as Liszt did on a piano most + easily when most effectively. Who can ever forget his attempt to + stop his Italian pianist—“a count in his own country, but not + much account in this”—who went on playing loudly while he was + trying to tell us an “affecting incident” that occurred near a + small clump of trees shown on his panorama of the Far West. The + music stormed on-we could see only lips and arms pathetically + moving till the piano suddenly ceased, and we heard-it was all we + heard “and, she fainted in Reginald's arms.” His tricks have been + at tempted in many theaters, but Artemus Ward was inimitable. And + all the time the man was dying. (Moneure D. Conway, + Autobiography.)]—who had quickly become a favorite in London, had + prepared the public for American platform humor, while the daily + doings of this new American product, as reported by the press, + had aroused interest, or curiosity, to a high pitch. On no + occasion in his own country had he won such a complete triumph. + The papers for a week devoted columns of space to appreciation + and editorial comment. The Daily News of October 17th published a + column-and-a-half editorial on American humor, with Mark Twain's + public appearance as the general text. The Times referred to the + continued popularity of the lectures: + + They can't be said to have more than whetted the public appetite, + if we are to take the fact which has been imparted to us, that the + holding capacity of the Hanover Square Rooms has been inadequate to + the demand made upon it every night by Twain's lecturing, as a + criterion. The last lecture of this too brief course was delivered + yesterday before an audience which crammed to discomfort every part + of the principal apartment of the Hanover Square Rooms.... + + At the close of yesterday's lecture Mark Twain was so loudly + applauded that he returned to the stage, and, as soon as the + audience gave him a chance of being heard, he said, with much + apparent emotion: + + “Ladies and Gentlemen,—I won't keep you one single moment in this + suffocating atmosphere. I simply wish to say that this is the last + lecture I shall have the honor to deliver in London until I return + from America, four weeks from now. I only wish to say (here Mr. + Clemens faltered as if too much affected to proceed) I am very + grateful. I do not wish to appear pathetic, but it is something + magnificent for a stranger to come to the metropolis of the world + and be received so handsomely as I have been. I simply thank you.” + + The Saturday Review devoted a page, and Once a Week, under the + head of “Cracking jokes,” gave three pages, to praise of the + literary and lecture methods of the new American humorist. With + the promise of speedy return, he left London, gave the lecture + once in Liverpool, and with his party (October 21st) set sail for + home. + + In mid-Atlantic he remembered Dr. Brown, and wrote him: + + We have plowed a long way over the sea, and there's twenty-two + hundred miles of restless water between us now, besides the railway + stretch. And yet you are so present with us, so close to us, that a + span and a whisper would bridge the distance. + + So it would seem that of all the many memories of that eventful + half-year, that of Dr. Brown was the most present, the most + tender. + + + + + XCII. FURTHER LONDON LECTURE TRIUMPHS + + + Orion Clemens records that he met “Sam and Livy” on their arrival + from England, November 2d, and that the president of the + Mercantile Library Association sent up his card “four times,” in + the hope of getting a chance to propose a lecture engagement—an + incident which impressed Orion deeply in its evidence of his + brother's towering importance. Orion himself was by this time + engaged in various projects. He was inventing a flying-machine, + for one thing, writing a Jules Verne story, reading proof on a + New York daily, and contemplating the lecture field. This great + blaze of international appreciation which had come to the little + boy who used to set type for him in Hannibal, and wash up the + forms and cry over the dirty proof, made him gasp. + + They went to see Booth in Hamlet [he says], and Booth sent for + Sam to come behind the scenes, and when Sam proposed to add a + part to Hamlet, the part of a bystander who makes humorous modern + comment on the situations in the play, Booth laughed + immoderately. + + Proposing a sacrilege like that to Booth! To what heights had + this printer-pilot, miner-brother not attained!—[This idea of + introducing a new character in Hamlet was really attempted later + by Mark Twain, with the connivance of Joe Goodman [of all men], + sad to relate. So far as is known it is the one stain on + Goodman's literary record.] + + Clemens returned immediately to England—the following Saturday, + in fact—and was back in London lecturing again after barely a + month's absence. He gave the “Roughing It” address, this time + under the title of “Roughing It on the Silver Frontier,” and if + his audiences were any less enthusiastic, or his houses less + crowded than before, the newspapers of that day have left no + record of it. It was the height of the season now, and being free + to do so, he threw himself into the whirl of it, and for two + months, beyond doubt, was the most talked-of figure in London. + The Athenaeum Club made him a visiting member (an honor + considered next to knighthood); Punch quoted him; societies + banqueted him; his apartments, as before; were besieged by + callers. Afternoons one was likely to find him in “Poets' Corner” + of the Langham smoking-room, with a group of London and American + authors—Reade, Collins, Miller, and the others—frankly rioting in + his bold fancies. Charles Warren Stoddard was in London at the + time, and acted as his secretary. Stoddard was a gentle poet, a + delightful fellow, and Clemens was very fond of him. His only + complaint of Stoddard was that he did not laugh enough at his + humorous yarns. Clemens once said: + + “Dolby and I used to come in after the lecture, or perhaps after + being out to some dinner, and we liked to sit down and talk it + over and tell yarns, and we expected Stoddard to laugh at them, + but Stoddard would lie there on the couch and snore. Otherwise, + as a secretary, he was perfect.” + + The great Tichborne trial was in progress then, and the spectacle + of an illiterate impostor trying to establish his claim as the + rightful heir to a great estate was highly diverting to Mark + Twain.—[In a letter of this period he speaks of having attended + one of the Claimant's “Evenings.”]—He wanted to preserve the + evidence as future literary material, and Stoddard day after day + patiently collected the news reports and neatly pasted them into + scrap-books, where they still rest, a complete record of that now + forgotten farce. The Tichborne trial recalled to Mark Twain the + claimant in the Lampton family, who from time to time wrote him + long letters, urging him to join in the effort to establish his + rights to the earldom of Durham. This American claimant was a + distant cousin, who had “somehow gotten hold of, or had + fabricated a full set of documents.” + + Colonel Henry Watterson, just quoted (also a Lampton connection), + adds: + + During the Tichborne trial Mark and I were in London, and one day + he said to me: “I have investigated this Durham business down at + the Herald's office. There is nothing to it. The Lamptons passed + out of the earldom of Durham a hundred years ago. There were never + any estates; the title lapsed; the present earldom is a new + creation, not in the same family at all. But I'll tell you what: if + you'll put up $500, I'll put up $500 more; we'll bring our chap + over here and set him in as claimant, and, my word for it, + Kenealy's fat boy won't be a marker to him.” + + It was a characteristic Mark Twain project, one of the sort he + never earned out in reality, but loved to follow in fancy, and + with the pen sometimes. The “Rightful Earl of Durham” continued + to send letters for a long time after that (some of them still + exist), but he did not establish his claim. No one but Mark Twain + ever really got anything out of it. Like the Tennessee land, it + furnished material by and by for a book. Colonel Watterson goes + on to say that Clemens was only joking about having looked up the + matter in the peerage; that he hadn't really looked it up at all, + and that the earldom lies still in the Lampton family. + + Another of Clemens's friends in London at this time was Prentice + Mulford, of California. In later years Mulford acquired a wide + reputation for his optimistic and practical psychologies. Through + them he lifted himself out of the slough of despond, and he + sought to extend a helping hand to others. His “White Cross + Library” had a wide reading and a wide influence; perhaps has to + this day. But in 1873 Mulford had not found the tangibility of + thought, the secret of strength; he was only finding it, maybe, + in his frank acknowledgment of shortcoming: + + Now, Mark, I am down-very much down at present; you are up-where + you deserve to be. I can't ask this on the score of any past + favors, for there have been none. I have not always spoken of you + in terms of extravagant praise; have sometimes criticized you, + which was due, I suppose, in part to an envious spirit. I am simply + human. Some people in the same profession say they entertain no + jealousy of those more successful. I can't. They are divine; I am + not. + + It was only that he wished Clemens to speak a word for him to + Routledge, to get him a hearing for his work. He adds: + + I shall be up myself some day, although my line is far apart from + yours. Whether you can do anything that I ask of you or not, I + shall be happy then, as I would be now, to do you any just and + right service.... Perhaps I have mistaken my vocation. Certainly, + if I was back with my rocker on the Tuolumne, I'd make it rattle + livelier than ever I did before. I have occasionally thought of + London Bridge, but the Thames is now so d—-d cold and dirty, and + besides I can swim, and any attempt at drowning would, through the + mere instinct of self-preservation, only result in my swimming + ashore and ruining my best clothes; wherefore I should be worse off + than ever. + + Of course Mark Twain granted the favor Mulford asked, and a great + deal more, no doubt, for that was his way. Mulford came up, as he + had prophesied, but the sea in due time claimed him, though not + in the way he had contemplated. Years after he was one day found + drifting off the shores of Long Island in an open boat, dead. + + Clemens made a number of notable dinner speeches during this + second London lecture period. His response to the toast of the + “Ladies,” delivered at the annual dinner of the Scottish + Corporation of London, was the sensational event of the evening. + + He was obliged to decline an invitation to the Lord Mayor's + dinner, whereupon his Lordship wrote to urge him to be present at + least at the finale, when the welcome would be “none the less + hearty,” and bespoke his attendance for any future dinners. + + Clemens lectured steadily at the Hanover Square Rooms during the + two months of his stay in London, and it was only toward the end + of this astonishing engagement that the audience began to show + any sign of diminishing. Early in January he wrote to Twichell: + + I am not going to the provinces because I cannot get halls that + are large enough. I always felt cramped in the Hanover Square + Rooms, but I find that everybody here speaks with awe and respect + of that prodigious hall and wonders that I could fill it so long. + + I am hoping to be back in twenty days, but I have so much to go + home to and enjoy with a jubilant joy that it hardly seems + possible that it can come to pass in so uncertain a world as + this. + + In the same letter he speaks of attending an exhibition of + Landseer's paintings at the Royal Academy: + + Ah, they are wonderfully beautiful! There are such rich moonlights + and dusks in the “Challenge” and the “Combat,” and in that long + flight of birds across a lake in the subdued flush of sunset (or + sunrise, for no man can ever tell t'other from which in a picture, + except it has the filmy morning mist breathing itself up from the + water), and there is such a grave analytical profundity in the face + of the connoisseurs; and such pathos in the picture of a fawn + suckling its dead mother on a snowy waste, with only the blood in + the footprints to hint that she is not asleep. And the way that he + makes animals' flesh and blood, insomuch that if the room were + darkened ever so little, and a motionless living animal placed + beside the painted one, no man could tell which was which. + + I interrupted myself here, to drop a line to Shirley Brooks and + suggest a cartoon for Punch. It was this: in one of the Academy + saloons (in a suite where these pictures are) a fine bust of + Landseer stands on a pedestal in the center of the room. I + suggested that some of Landseer's best known animals be + represented as having come down out of their frames in the + moonlight and grouped themselves about the bust in mourning + attitudes. + + He sailed January 13 (1874.), on the Paythia, and two weeks later + was at home, where all was going well. The Gilded Age had been + issued a day or two before Christmas, and was already in its + third edition. By the end of January 26,000 copies had been sold, + a sale that had increased to 40,000 a month later. The new house + was progressing, though it was by no means finished. Mrs. Clemens + was in good health. Little Susy was full of such American + activities as to earn the name of “The Modoc.” The promise of the + year was bright. + + + + + XCIII. THE REAL COLONEL SELLERS-GOLDEN DAYS + + + There are bound to be vexations, flies in the ointment, as we + say. It was Warner who conferred the name of Eschol Sellers on + the chief figure of the collaborated novel. Warner had known it + as the name of an obscure person, or perhaps he had only heard of + it. At all events, it seemed a good one for the character and had + been adopted. But behold, the book had been issued but a little + while when there rose “out of the vasty deeps” a genuine Eschol + Sellers, who was a very respectable person. He was a stout, + prosperous-looking man, gray and about fifty-five years old. He + came into the American Publishing Company offices and asked + permission to look at the book. Mr. Bliss was out at the moment, + but presently arrived. The visitor rose and introduced himself. + + “My name is Eschol Sellers,” he said. “You have used it in one of + your publications. It has brought upon me a lot of ridicule. My + people wish me to sue you for $10,000 damages.” + + He had documents to prove his identity, and there was only one + thing to be done; he must be satisfied. Bliss agreed to recall as + many of the offending volumes as possible and change the name on + the plates. He contacted the authors, and the name Beriah was + substituted for the offending Eschol. It turned out that the real + Sellers family was a large one, and that the given name Eschol + was not uncommon in its several branches. This particular Eschol + Sellers, curiously enough, was an inventor and a promoter, though + of a much more substantial sort than his fiction namesake. He was + also a painter of considerable merit, a writer and an + antiquarian. He was said to have been a grandson of the famous + painter, Rembrandt Peale. + + Clemens vowed that he would not lecture in America that winter. + The irrepressible Redpath besieged him as usual, and at the end + of January Clemens telegraphed him, as he thought, finally. + Following it with a letter of explanation, he added: + + “I said to her, 'There isn't money enough in America to hire me + to leave you for one day.'” + + But Redpath was a persistent devil. He used arguments and held + out inducements which even Mrs. Clemens thought should not be + resisted, and Clemens yielded from time to time, and gave a + lecture here and there during February. Finally, on the 3d of + March (1879.) he telegraphed his tormentor: + + “Why don't you congratulate me? I never expect to stand on a + lecture platform again after Thursday night.” + + Howells tells delightfully of a visit which he and Aldrich paid + to Hartford just at this period. Aldrich went to visit Clemens + and Howells to visit Charles Dudley Warner, Clemens coming as far + as Springfield to welcome them. + + In the good-fellowship of that cordial neighborhood we had two such + days as the aging sun no longer shines on in his round. There was + constant running in and out of friendly houses where the lively + hosts and guests called one another by their Christian names or + nicknames, and no such vain ceremony as knocking or ringing at + doors. Clemens was then building the stately mansion in which he + satisfied his love of magnificence as if it had been another + sealskin coat, and he was at the crest of the prosperity which + enabled him to humor every whim or extravagance. + + Howells tells how Clemens dilated on the advantages of + subscription sale over the usual methods of publication, and + urged the two Boston authors to prepare something which + canvassers could handle. + + “Why, any other means of bringing out a book is privately + printing it,” he declared, and added that his subscription books + in Bliss's hands sold right along, “just like the Bible.” + + On the way back to Boston Howells and Aldrich planned a + subscription book which would sell straight along, like the + Bible. It was to be called “Twelve Memorable Murders.” They had + dreamed two or three fortunes by the time they had reached + Boston, but the project ended there. + + “We never killed a single soul,” Howells said once to the writer + of this memoir. + + Clemens was always urging Howells to visit him after that. He + offered all sorts of inducements. + + You will find us the most reasonable people in the world. We had + thought of precipitating upon you, George Warner and his wife one + day, Twichell and his jewel of a wife another day, and Charles + Perkins and wife another. Only those—simply members of our family + they are. But I'll close the door against them all, which will + “fix” all of the lot except Twichell, who will no more hesitate to + climb in the back window than nothing. + And you shall go to bed when you please, get up when you please, + talk when you please, read when you please. + + A little later he was urging Howells or Aldrich, or both of them; + to come to Hartford to live. + + Mr. Hall, who lives in the house next to Mrs. Stowe's (just where + we drive in to go to our new house), will sell for $16,000 or + $17,000. You can do your work just as well here as in Cambridge, + can't you? Come! Will one of you boys buy that house? Now, say yes. + + Certainly those were golden, blessed days, and perhaps, as + Howells says, the sun does not shine on their like any more—not + in Hartford, at least, for the old group that made them no longer + assembles there. Hartford about this time became a sort of shrine + for all literary visitors, and for other notables as well, + whether of America or from overseas. It was the half-way place + between Boston and New York, and pilgrims going in either + direction rested there. It is said that travelers arriving in + America, were apt to remember two things they wished to see: + Niagara Falls and Mark Twain. But the Falls had no such recent + advertising advantage as that spectacular success in London. + Visitors were apt to begin in Hartford. + + Howells went with considerable frequency after that, or rather + with regularity, twice a year, or oftener, and his coming was + always hailed with great rejoicing. They visited and ate around + at one place and another among that pleasant circle of friends. + But they were happiest afterward together, Clemens smoking + continually, “soothing his tense nerves with a mild hot Scotch,” + says Howells, “while we both talked, and talked, and tasked of + everything in the heavens and on the earth, and the waters under + the earth. After two days of this talk I would come away hollow, + realizing myself best in the image of one of those locust-shells + which you find sticking to the bark of trees at the end of + summer.” Sometimes Clemens told the story of his early life, “the + inexhaustible, the fairy, the Arabian Nights story, which I could + never tire of even when it began to be told over again.” + + + + + XCIV. BEGINNING “TOM SAWYER” + + + The Clemens household went to Quarry Farm in April, leaving the + new house once more in the hands of the architect and builders. + It was costing a vast sum of money, and there was a financial + stress upon land. Mrs. Clemens, always prudent, became a little + uneasy at times, though without warrant in those days, for her + business statement showed that her holdings were only a little + less than a quarter of a million in her own right, while her + husband's books and lectures had been highly remunerative, and + would be more so. They were justified in living in ample, even + luxurious comfort, and how free from financial worries they could + have lived for the rest of their days! + + Clemens, realizing his happiness, wrote Dr. Brown: + + Indeed I am thankful for the wifey and the child, and if there is + one individual creature on all this footstool who is more + thoroughly and uniformly and, unceasingly happy than I am I defy + the world to produce him and prove him. In my opinion he don't + exist. I was a mighty rough, coarse, unpromising subject when + Livy took charge of me, four years ago, and I may still be to the + rest of the world, but not to her. She has made a very creditable + job of me. + + Truly fortune not only smiled, but laughed. Every mail brought + great bundles of letters that sang his praises. Robert Watt, who + had translated his books into Danish, wrote of their wide + popularity among his people. Madame Blanc (Th. Bentzon), who as + early as 1872 had translated The Jumping Frog into French, and + published it, with extended comment on the author and his work, + in the 'Revue des deux mondes', was said to be preparing a review + of 'The Gilded Age'. All the world seemed ready to do him honor. + + Of course, one must always pay the price, usually a vexatious + one. Bores stopped him on the street to repeat ancient and + witless stories. Invented anecdotes, some of them exasperating + ones, went the rounds of the press. Impostors in distant + localities personated him, or claimed to be near relatives, and + obtained favors, sometimes money, in his name. Trivial letters, + seeking benefactions of every kind, took the savor from his daily + mail. Letters from literary aspirants were so numerous that he + prepared a “form” letter of reply: + + DEAR SIR OR MADAM,—Experience has not taught me very much, still + it has taught me that it is not wise to criticize a piece of + literature, except to an enemy of the person who wrote it; then + if you praise it that enemy admires—you for your honest + manliness, and if you dispraise it he admires you for your sound + judgment. + + Yours truly, S. L. C. + + Even Orion, now in Keokuk on a chicken farm, pursued him with + manuscripts and proposals of schemes. Clemens had bought this + farm for Orion, who had counted on large and quick returns, but + was planning new enterprises before the first eggs were hatched. + Orion Clemens was as delightful a character as was ever created + in fiction, but he must have been a trial now and then to Mark + Twain. We may gather something of this from a letter written by + the latter to his mother and sister at this period: + + I can't “encourage” Orion. Nobody can do that conscientiously, for + the reason that before one's letter has time to reach him he is off + on some new wild-goose chase. Would you encourage in literature a + man who the older he grows the worse he writes? + I cannot encourage him to try the ministry, because he would change + his religion so fast that he would have to keep a traveling agent + under wages to go ahead of him to engage pulpits and board for him. + I cannot conscientiously encourage him to do anything but potter + around his little farm and put in his odd hours contriving new and + impossible projects at the rate of 365 a year which is his + customary average. He says he did well in Hannibal! Now there is a + man who ought to be entirely satisfied with the grandeurs, + emoluments, and activities of a hen farm. + If you ask me to pity Orion I can do that. I can do it every day + and all day long. But one can't “encourage” quicksilver; because + the instant you put your finger on it, it isn't there. No, I am + saying too much. He does stick to his literary and legal + aspirations, and he naturally would elect the very two things which + he is wholly and preposterously unfitted for. If I ever become + able, I mean to put Orion on a regular pension without revealing + the fact that it is a pension. + He did presently allow the pension, a liberal one, which continued + until neither Orion Clemens nor his wife had further earthly need + of it. + + Mark Twain for some time had contemplated one of the books that + will longest preserve his memory, 'The Adventures of Tom Sawyer'. + The success of 'Roughing It' naturally made him cast about for + other autobiographical material, and he remembered those days + along the river-front in Hannibal—his skylarking with Tom + Blankenship, the Bowen boys, John Briggs, and the rest. He had + recognized these things as material—inviting material it was—and + now in the cool luxury of Quarry Farm he set himself to spin the + fabric of youth. + + He found summer-time always his best period for literary effort, + and on a hillside just by the old quarry, Mrs. Crane had built + for him that spring a study—a little room of windows, somewhat + suggestive of a pilot-house—overlooking the long sweep of grass + and the dreamlike city below. Vines were planted that in the + course of time would cover and embower it; there was a tiny + fireplace for chilly days. To Twichell, of his new retreat, + Clemens wrote: + + It is the loveliest study you ever saw. It is octagonal, with a + peaked roof, each face filled with a spacious window, and it sits + perched in complete isolation on the top of an elevation that + commands leagues of valley and city and retreating ranges of + distant blue hills. It is a cozy nest and just room in it for a + sofa, table, and three or four chairs, and when the storms sweep + down the remote valley and the lightning flashes behind the hills + beyond, and the rain beats upon the roof over my head, imagine + the luxury of it. + + He worked steadily there that summer. He would go up mornings, + after breakfast, remaining until nearly dinner-time, say until + five o'clock or after, for it was not his habit to eat luncheon. + Other members of the family did not venture near the place, and + if he was urgently wanted they blew a horn. Each evening he + brought down his day's performance to read to the assembled + family. He felt the need of audience and approval. Usually he + earned the latter, but not always. Once, when for a day he put + aside other matters to record a young undertaker's love-affair, + and brought down the result in the evening, fairly bubbling with + the joy of it, he met with a surprise. The tale was a ghastly + burlesque, its humor of the most disheartening, unsavory sort. No + one spoke during the reading, nobody laughed: The air was thick + with disapproval. His voice lagged and faltered toward the end. + When he finished there was heavy silence. Mrs. Clemens was the + only one who could speak: + + “Youth, let's walk a little,” she said. + + The “Undertaker's Love Story” is still among the manuscripts of + that period, but it is unlikely that it will ever see the light + of print.—[This tale bears no relation to “The Undertaker's + Story” in Sketches New and Old.] + + The Tom Sawyer tale progressed steadily and satisfactorily. + Clemens wrote Dr. Brown: + + I have been writing fifty pages of manuscript a day, on an average, + for some time now, on a book (a story), and consequently have been + so wrapped up in it, and dead to everything else, that I have + fallen mighty short in letter-writing.... + On hot days I spread the study wide open, anchor my papers down + with brickbats, and write in the midst of the hurricane, clothed in + the same thin linen we make shirts of. + + He incloses some photographs in this letter. + + The group [he says] represents the vine-clad carriageway in front + of the farm-house. On the left is Megalopis sitting in the lap of + her German nurse-maid. I am sitting behind them. Mrs. Crane is in + the center. Mr. Crane next to her. Then Mrs. Clemens and the new + baby. Her Irish nurse stands at her back. Then comes the table + waitress, a young negro girl, born free. Next to her is Auntie Cord + (a fragment of whose history I have just sent to a magazine). She + is the cook; was in slavery more than forty years; and the self- + satisfied wench, the last of the group, is the little baby's + American nurse-maid. In the middle distance my mother-in-law's + coachman (up on errand) has taken a position unsolicited to help + out the picture. No, that is not true. He was waiting there a + minute or two before the photographer came. In the extreme + background, under the archway, you glimpse my study. + + The “new baby,” “Bay,” as they came to call her, was another + little daughter, born in June, a happy, healthy addition to the + household. In a letter written to Twichell we get a sweet summer + picture of this period, particularly of little sunny-haired, + two-year-old Susy. + + There is nothing selfish about the Modoc. She is fascinated with + the new baby. The Modoc rips and tears around outdoors most of the + time, and consequently is as hard as a pineknot and as brown as an + Indian. She is bosom friend to all the chickens, ducks, turkeys, + and guinea-hens on the place. Yesterday, as she marched along the + winding path that leads up the hill through the red-clover beds to + the summer-house, there was a long procession of these fowls + stringing contentedly after her, led by a stately rooster, who can + look over the Modoc's head. The devotion of these vassals has been + purchased with daily largess of Indian meal, and so the Modoc, + attended by her body-guard, moves in state wherever she goes. + + There were days, mainly Sundays, when he did not work at all; + peaceful days of lying fallow, dreaming in shady places, drowsily + watching little Susy, or reading with Mrs. Clemens. Howells's + “Foregone Conclusion” was running in the Atlantic that year, and + they delighted in it. Clemens wrote the author: + + I should think that this must be the daintiest, truest, most + admirable workmanship that was ever put on a story. The creatures + of God do not act out their natures more unerringly than yours do. + If your genuine stories can die I wonder by what right old Walter + Scott's artificialities shall continue to live. + + At other times he found comfort in the society of Theodore Crane. + These two were always fond of each other, and often read together + the books in which they were mutually interested. They had + portable-hammock arrangements, which they placed side by side on + the lawn, and read and discussed through summer afternoons. The + 'Mutineers of the Bounty' was one of the books they liked best, + and there was a story of an Iceland farmer, a human document, + that had an unfading interest. Also there were certain articles + in old numbers of the Atlantic that they read and reread. 'Pepys' + Diary', 'Two Years Before the Mast', and a book on the Andes were + reliable favorites. Mark Twain read not so many books, but read a + few books often. Those named were among the literature he asked + for each year of his return to Quarry Farm. Without them, the + farm and the summer would not be the same. + + Then there was 'Lecky's History of European Morals'; there were + periods when they read Lecky avidly and discussed it in original + and unorthodox ways. Mark Twain found an echo of his own + philosophies in Lecky. He made frequent marginal notes along the + pages of the world's moral history—notes not always quotable in + the family circle. Mainly, however, they were short, crisp + interjections of assent or disapproval. In one place Lecky refers + to those who have undertaken to prove that all our morality is a + product of experience, holding that a desire to obtain happiness + and to avoid pain is the only possible motive to action; the + reason, and the only reason, why we should perform virtuous + actions being “that on the whole such a course will bring us the + greatest amount of happiness.” Clemens has indorsed these + philosophies by writing on the margin, “Sound and true.” It was + the philosophy which he himself would always hold (though, + apparently, never live by), and in the end would embody a volume + of his own.—[What Is Man? Privately printed in 1906.]—In another + place Lecky, himself speaking, says: + + Fortunately we are all dependent for many of our pleasures on + others. Co-operation and organization are essential to our + happiness, and these are impossible without some restraint being + placed upon our appetites. Laws are made to secure this restraint, + and being sustained by rewards, and punishments they make it the + interest of the individual to regard that of the community. + + “Correct!” comments Clemens. “He has proceeded from unreasoned + selfishness to reasoned selfishness. All our acts, reasoned and + unreasoned, are selfish.” It was a conclusion he logically never + departed from; not the happiest one, it would seem, at first + glance, but one easier to deny than to disprove. + + On the back of an old envelope Mark Twain set down his literary + declaration of this period. + + “I like history, biography, travels, curious facts and strange + happenings, and science. And I detest novels, poetry, and + theology.” + + But of course the novels of Howells would be excepted; Lecky was + not theology, but the history of it; his taste for poetry would + develop later, though it would never become a fixed quantity, as + was his devotion to history and science. His interest in these + amounted to a passion. + + + + + XCV. AN “ATLANTIC” STORY AND A PLAY + + + The reference to “Auntie Cord” in the letter to Dr. Brown brings + us to Mark Twain's first contribution to the Atlantic Monthly. + Howells in his Recollections of his Atlantic editorship, after + referring to certain Western contributors, says: + + Later came Mark Twain, originally of Missouri, but then + provisionally of Hartford, and now ultimately of the solar system, + not to say the universe. He came first with “A True Story,” one of + those noble pieces of humanity with which the South has atoned + chiefly, if not solely, through him for all its despite to the + negro. + + Clemens had long aspired to appear in the Atlantic, but such was + his own rating of his literature that he hardly hoped to qualify + for its pages. Twichell remembers his “mingled astonishment and + triumph” when he was invited to send something to the magazine. + + He was obliged to “send something” once or twice before the + acceptance of “A True Story,” the narrative of Auntie Cord, and + even this acceptance brought with it the return of a fable which + had accompanied it, with the explanation that a fable like that + would disqualify the magazine for every denominational reader, + though Howells hastened to express his own joy in it, having been + particularly touched by the author's reference to Sisyphus and + Atlas as ancestors of the tumble-bug. The “True Story,” he said, + with its “realest king of black talk,” won him, and a few days + later he wrote again: “This little story delights me more and + more. I wish you had about forty of 'em.” + + And so, modestly enough, as became him, for the story was of the + simplest, most unpretentious sort, Mark Twain entered into the + school of the elect. + + In his letter to Howells, accompanying the MS., the author said: + + I inclose also “A True Story,” which has no humor in it. You can + pay as lightly as you choose for that if you want it, for it is + rather out of my line. I have not altered the old colored woman's + story, except to begin it at the beginning, instead of the middle, + as she did—and traveled both ways. + + Howells in his Recollections tells of the business anxiety in the + Atlantic office in the effort to estimate the story's pecuniary + value. Clemens and Harte had raised literary rates enormously; + the latter was reputed to have received as much as five cents a + word from affluent newspapers! But the Atlantic was poor, and + when sixty dollars was finally decided upon for the three pages + (about two and a half cents a word) the rate was regarded as + handsome—without precedent in Atlantic history. Howells adds that + as much as forty times this amount was sometimes offered to Mark + Twain in later years. Even in '74 he had received a much higher + rate than that offered by the Atlantic,—but no acceptance, then, + or later, ever made him happier, or seemed more richly rewarded. + + “A True Story, Repeated Word for Word as I Heard It” was + precisely what it claimed to be.—[Atlantic Monthly for November, + 1874; also included in Sketches New and Old.]—Auntie Cord, the + Auntie Rachel of that tale, cook at Quarry Farm, was a Virginia + negress who had been twice sold as a slave, and was proud of the + fact; particularly proud that she had brought $1,000 on the + block. All her children had been sold away from her, but it was a + long time ago, and now at sixty she was fat and seemingly without + care. She had told her story to Mrs. Crane, who had more than + once tried to persuade her to tell it to Clemens; but Auntie Cord + was reluctant. One evening, however, when the family sat on the + front veranda in the moonlight, looking down on the picture city, + as was their habit, Auntie Cord came around to say good night, + and Clemens engaged her in conversation. He led up to her story, + and almost before she knew it she was seated at his feet telling + the strange tale in almost the exact words in which it was set + down by him next morning. It gave Mark Twain a chance to exercise + two of his chief gifts—transcription and portrayal. He was always + greater at these things than at invention. Auntie Cord's story is + a little masterpiece. + + He wished to do more with Auntie Cord and her associates of the + farm, for they were extraordinarily interesting. Two other + negroes on the place, John Lewis and his wife (we shall hear + notably of Lewis later), were not always on terms of amity with + Auntie Cord. They disagreed on religion, and there were frequent + battles in the kitchen. These depressed the mistress of the + house, but they gave only joy to Mark Twain. His Southern raising + had given him an understanding of their humors, their native + emotions which made these riots a spiritual gratification. He + would slip around among the shrubbery and listen to the noise and + strife of battle, and hug himself with delight. Sometimes they + resorted to missiles—stones, tinware—even dressed poultry which + Auntie Cord was preparing for the oven. Lewis was very black, + Auntie Cord was a bright mulatto, Lewis's' wife several shades + lighter. Wherever the discussion began it promptly shaded off + toward the color-line and insult. Auntie Cord was a Methodist; + Lewis was a Dunkard. Auntie Cord was ignorant and dogmatic; Lewis + could read and was intelligent. Theology invariably led to + personality, and eventually to epithets, crockery, geology, and + victuals. How the greatest joker of the age did enjoy that summer + warfare! + + The fun was not all one-sided. An incident of that summer + probably furnished more enjoyment for the colored members of the + household than it did for Mark Twain. Lewis had some fowls, and + among them was a particularly pestiferous guinea-hen that used to + get up at three in the morning and go around making the kind of a + noise that a guinea-hen must like and is willing to get up early + to hear. Mark Twain did not care for it. He stood it as long as + he could one morning, then crept softly from the house to stop + it. + + It was a clear, bright night; locating the guinea-hen, he slipped + up stealthily with a stout stick. The bird was pouring out its + heart, tearing the moonlight to tatters. Stealing up close, + Clemens made a vicious swing with his bludgeon, but just then the + guinea stepped forward a little, and he missed. The stroke and + his explosion frightened the fowl, and it started to run. + Clemens, with his mind now on the single purpose of revenge, + started after it. Around the trees, along the paths, up and down + the lawn, through gates and across the garden, out over the + fields, they raced, “pursuer and pursued.” The guinea nor longer + sang, and Clemens was presently too exhausted to swear. Hour + after hour the silent, deadly hunt continued, both stopping to + rest at intervals; then up again and away. It was like something + in a dream. It was nearly breakfast-time when he dragged himself + into the house at last, and the guinea was resting and panting + under a currant-bush. Later in the day Clemens gave orders to + Lewis to “kill and eat that guinea-hen,” which Lewis did. Clemens + himself had then never eaten a guinea, but some years later, in + Paris, when the delicious breast of one of those fowls was served + him, he remembered and said: + + “And to think, after chasing that creature all night, John Lewis + got to eat him instead of me.” + + The interest in Tom and Huck, or the inspiration for their + adventures, gave out at last, or was superseded by a more + immediate demand. As early as May, Goodman, in San Francisco, had + seen a play announced there, presenting the character of Colonel + Sellers, dramatized by Gilbert S. Densmore and played by John T. + Raymond. Goodman immediately wrote Clemens; also a letter came + from Warner, in Hartford, who had noticed in San Francisco papers + announcements of the play. Of course Clemens would take action + immediately; he telegraphed, enjoining the performance. Then + began a correspondence with the dramatist and actor. This in time + resulted in an amicable arrangement, by which the dramatist + agreed to dispose of his version to Clemens. Clemens did not wait + for it to arrive, but began immediately a version of his own. + Just how much or how little of Densmore's work found its way into + the completed play, as presented by Raymond later, cannot be + known now. Howells conveys the impression that Clemens had no + hand in its authorship beyond the character of Sellers as taken + from the book. But in a letter still extant, which Clemens wrote + to Howells at the time, he says: + + I worked a month on my play, and launched it in New York last + Wednesday. I believe it will go. The newspapers have been + complimentary. It is simply a setting for one character, Colonel + Sellers. As a play I guess it will not bear critical assault in + force. + + The Warners are as charming as ever. They go shortly to the devil + for a year—that is, to Egypt. + + Raymond, in a letter which he wrote to the Sun, November 3, 1874, + declared that “not one line” of Densmore's dramatization was + used, “except that which was taken bodily from The Gilded Age.” + During the newspaper discussion of the matter, Clemens himself + prepared a letter for the Hartford Post. This letter was + suppressed, but it still exists. In it he says: + + I entirely rewrote the play three separate and distinct times. I + had expected to use little of his [Densmore's] language and but + little of his plot. I do not think there are now twenty sentences + of Mr. Densmore's in the play, but I used so much of his plot that + I wrote and told him that I should pay him about as much more as I + had already paid him in case the play proved a success. I shall + keep my word. + + This letter, written while the matter was fresh in his mind, is + undoubtedly in accordance with the facts. That Densmore was fully + satisfied may be gathered from an acknowledgment, in which he + says: “Your letter reached me on the ad, with check. In this + place permit me to thank you for the very handsome manner in + which you have acted in this matter.” + + Warner, meantime, realizing that the play was constructed almost + entirely of the Mark Twain chapters of the book, agreed that his + collaborator should undertake the work and financial + responsibilities of the dramatic venture and reap such rewards as + might result. Various stories have been told of this matter, most + of them untrue. There was no bitterness between the friends, no + semblance of an estrangement of any sort. Warner very generously + and promptly admitted that he was not concerned with the play, + its authorship, or its profits, whatever the latter might amount + to. Moreover, Warner was going to Egypt very soon, and his labors + and responsibilities were doubly sufficient as they stood. + + Clemens's estimate of the play as a dramatic composition was + correct enough, but the public liked it, and it was a financial + success from the start. He employed a representative to travel + with Raymond, to assist in the management and in the division of + spoil. The agent had instructions to mail a card every day, + stating the amount of his share in the profits. Howells once + arrived in Hartford just when this postal tide of fortune was at + its flood: + + One hundred and fifty dollars—two hundred dollars—three hundred + dollars were the gay figures which they bore, and which he + flaunted in the air, before he sat down at the table, or rose + from it to brandish, and then, flinging his napkin in the chair, + walked up and down to exult in. + + Once, in later years, referring to the matter, Howells said “He + was never a man who cared anything about money except as a dream, + and he wanted more and more of it to fill out the spaces of this + dream.” Which was a true word. Mark Twain with money was like a + child with a heap of bright pebbles, ready to pile up more and + still more, then presently to throw them all away and begin + gathering anew. + + + + + XCVI. THE NEW HOME + + + The Clemenses returned to Hartford to find their new house + “ready,” though still full of workmen, decorators, plumbers, and + such other minions of labor as make life miserable to those with + ambitions for new or improved habitations. The carpenters were + still on the lower floor, but the family moved in and camped + about in rooms up-stairs that were more or less free from the + invader. They had stopped in New York ten days to buy carpets and + furnishings, and these began to arrive, with no particular place + to put them; but the owners were excited and happy with it all, + for it was the pleasant season of the year, and all the new + features of the house were fascinating, while the daily progress + of the decorators furnished a fresh surprise when they roamed + through the rooms at evening. Mrs. Clemens wrote home: + + We are perfectly delighted with everything here and do so want you + all to see it. + + Her husband, as he was likely to do, picked up the letter and + finished it: + + Livy appoints me to finish this; but how can a headless man perform + an intelligent function? I have been bully-ragged all day by the + builder, by his foreman, by the architect, by the tapestry devil + who is to upholster the furniture, by the idiot who is putting down + the carpets, by the scoundrel who is setting up the billiard-table + (and has left the balls in New York), by the wildcat who is sodding + the ground and finishing the driveway (after the sun went down), by + a book agent, whose body is in the back yard and the coroner + notified. Just think of this thing going on the whole day long, and + I a man who loathes details with all his heart! But I haven't lost + my temper, and I've made Livy lie down most of the time; could + anybody make her lie down all the time? + + Warner wrote from Egypt expressing sympathy for their unfurnished + state of affairs, but added, “I would rather fit out three houses + and fill them with furniture than to fit out one 'dahabiyeh'.” + Warner was at that moment undertaking his charmingly remembered + trip up the Nile. + + The new home was not entirely done for a long time. One never + knows when a big house like that—or a little house, for that + matters done. But they were settled at last, with all their + beautiful things in place; and perhaps there have been richer + homes, possibly more artistic ones, but there has never been a + more charming home, within or without, than that one. + + So many frequenters have tried to express the charm of that + household. None of them has quite succeeded, for it lay not so + much in its arrangement of rooms or their decorations or their + outlook, though these were all beautiful enough, but rather in + the personality, the atmosphere; and these are elusive things to + convey in words. We can only see and feel and recognize; we + cannot translate them. Even Howells, with his subtle touch, can + present only an aspect here and there; an essence, as it were, + from a happy garden, rather than the fullness of its bloom. + + As Mark Twain was unlike any other man that ever lived, so his + house was unlike any other house ever built. People asked him why + he built the kitchen toward the street, and he said: + + “So the servants can see the circus go by without running out + into the front yard.” + + But this was probably an after-thought. The kitchen end of the + house extended toward Farmington Avenue, but it was by no means + unbeautiful. It was a pleasing detail of the general scheme. The + main entrance faced at right angles with the street and opened to + a spacious hall. In turn, the hall opened to a parlor, where + there was a grand piano, and to the dining-room and library, and + the library opened to a little conservatory, semicircular in + form, of a design invented by Harriet Beecher Stowe. Says + Howells: + + The plants were set in the ground, and the flowering vines climbed + up the sides and overhung the roof above the silent spray of the + fountain companied by Callas and other waterloving lilies. There, + while we breakfasted, Patrick came in from the barn and sprinkled + the pretty bower, which poured out its responsive perfume in the + delicate accents of its varied blossoms. + + In the library was an old carved mantel which Clemens and his + wife had bought in Scotland, salvage from a dismantled castle, + and across the top of the fireplace a plate of brass with the + motto, “The ornament of a house is the friends that frequent it,” + surely never more appropriately inscribed. + + There was the mahogany room, a large bedroom on the ground floor, + and upstairs were other spacious bedrooms and many baths, while + everywhere were Oriental rugs and draperies, and statuary and + paintings. There was a fireplace under a window, after the + English pattern, so that in winter-time one could at the same + moment watch the blaze and the falling snow. The library windows + looked out over the valley with the little stream in it, and + through and across the tree-tops. At the top of the house was + what became Clemens's favorite retreat, the billiard-room, and + here and there were unexpected little balconies, which one could + step out upon for the view. + + Below was a wide, covered veranda, the “ombra,” as they called + it, secluded from the public eye—a favorite family + gathering-place on pleasant days. + + But a house might easily have all these things without being more + than usually attractive, and a house with a great deal less might + have been as full of charm; only it seemed just the proper + setting for that particular household, and undoubtedly it + acquired the personality of its occupants. + + Howells assures us that there never was another home like it, and + we may accept his statement. It was unique. It was the home of + one of the most unusual and unaccountable personalities in the + world, yet was perfectly and serenely ordered. Mark Twain was not + responsible for this blissful condition. He was its beacon-light; + it was around Mrs. Clemens that its affairs steadily revolved. + + If in the four years and more of marriage Clemens had made + advancement in culture and capabilities, Olivia Clemens also had + become something more than the half-timid, inexperienced girl he + had first known. In a way her education had been no less notable + than his. She had worked and studied, and her half-year of travel + and entertainment abroad had given her opportunity for acquiring + knowledge and confidence. Her vision of life had vastly enlarged; + her intellect had flowered; her grasp of practicalities had + become firm and sure. + + In spite of her delicate physical structure, her continued + uncertainty of health, she capably undertook the management of + their large new house, and supervised its economies. Any one of + her undertakings was sufficient for one woman, but she compassed + them all. No children had more careful direction than hers. No + husband had more devoted attendance and companionship. No + household was ever directed with a sweeter and gentler grace, or + with greater perfection of detail. When the great ones of the + world came to visit America's most picturesque literary figure + she gave welcome to them all, and filled her place at his side + with such sweet and capable dignity that those who came to pay + their duties to him often returned to pay even greater devotion + to his companion. Says Howells: + + She was, in a way, the loveliest person I have ever seen—the + gentlest, the kindest, without a touch of weakness; she united + wonderful tact with wonderful truth; and Clemens not only accepted + her rule implicitly, but he rejoiced, he gloried in it. + + And once, in an interview with the writer of these chapters, + Howells declared: “She was not only a beautiful soul, but a woman + of singular intellectual power. I never knew any one quite like + her.” Then he added: “Words cannot express Mrs. Clemens—her + fineness, her delicate, her wonderful tact with a man who was in + some respects, and wished to be, the most outrageous creature + that ever breathed.” + + Howells meant a good many things by that, no doubt: Clemens's + violent methods, for one thing, his sudden, savage impulses, + which sometimes worked injustice and hardship for others, though + he was first to discover the wrong and to repair it only too + fully. Then, too, Howells may have meant his boyish teasing + tendency to disturb Mrs. Clemens's exquisite sense of decorum. + + Once I remember seeing him come into his drawing-room at Hartford + in a pair of white cowskin slippers with the hair out, and do a + crippled colored uncle, to the joy of all beholders. I must not + say all, for I remember also the dismay of Mrs. Clemens, and her + low, despairing cry of “Oh, Youth!” + + He was continually doing such things as the “crippled colored + uncle,”; partly for the very joy of the performance, but partly, + too, to disturb her serenity, to incur her reproof, to shiver her + a little—“shock” would be too strong a word. And he liked to + fancy her in a spirit and attitude of belligerence, to present + that fancy to those who knew the measure of her gentle nature. + Writing to Mrs. Howells of a picture of herself in a group, he + said: + + You look exactly as Mrs. Clemens does after she has said: “Indeed, + I do not wonder that you can frame no reply; for you know only too + well that your conduct admits of no excuse, palliation, or argument + —none!” + + Clemens would pretend to a visitor that she had been violently + indignant over some offense of his; perhaps he would say: + + “Well I contradicted her just now, and the crockery will begin to + fly pretty soon.” + + She could never quite get used to this pleasantry, and a faint + glow would steal over her face. He liked to produce that glow. + Yet always his manner toward her was tenderness itself. He + regarded her as some dainty bit of porcelain, and it was said + that he was always following her about with a chair. Their union + has been regarded as ideal. That is Twichell's opinion and + Howells's. The latter sums up: + + Marriages are what the parties to them alone really know them to + be, but from the outside I should say that this marriage was one of + the most perfect. + + + + + XCVII. THE WALK TO BOSTON + + + The new home became more beautiful to them as things found their + places, as the year deepened; and the wonder of autumn foliage + lit up their landscape. Sitting on one of the little upper + balconies Mrs. Clemens wrote: + + The atmosphere is very hazy, and it makes the autumn tints even + more soft and beautiful than usual. Mr. Twichell came for Mr. + Clemens to go walking with him; they returned at dinner-time, + heavily laden with autumn leaves. + + And as usual Clemens, finding the letter unfinished, took up the + story. + + Twichell came up here with me to luncheon after services, and I + went back home with him and took Susy along in her little carriage. + We have just got home again, middle of afternoon, and Livy has gone + to rest and left the west balcony to me. There is a shining and + most marvelous miracle of cloud-effects mirrored in the brook; a + picture which began with perfection, and has momently surpassed it + ever since, until at last it is almost unendurably beautiful.... + There is a cloud-picture in the stream now whose hues are as + manifold as those in an opal and as delicate as the tintings of a + sea-shell. But now a muskrat is swimming through it and + obliterating it with the turmoil of wavelets he casts abroad from + his shoulders. + The customary Sunday assemblage of strangers is gathered together + in the grounds discussing the house. + + Twichell and Clemens took a good many walks these days; long + walks, for Twichell was an athlete and Clemens had not then + outgrown the Nevada habit of pedestrian wandering. Talcott's + Tower, a wooden structure about five miles from Hartford, was one + of their favorite objective points; and often they walked out and + back, talking so continuously, and so absorbed in the themes of + their discussions, that time and distance slipped away almost + unnoticed. How many things they talked of in those long walks! + They discussed philosophies and religions and creeds, and all the + range of human possibility and shortcoming, and all the phases of + literature and history and politics. Unorthodox discussions they + were, illuminating, marvelously enchanting, and vanished now + forever. Sometimes they took the train as far as Bloomfield, a + little station on the way, and walked the rest of the distance, + or they took the train from Bloomfield home. It seems a strange + association, perhaps, the fellowship of that violent dissenter + with that fervent soul dedicated to church and creed, but the + root of their friendship lay in the frankness with which each man + delivered his dogmas and respected those of his companion. + + It was during one of their walks to the tower that they planned a + far more extraordinary undertaking—nothing less, in fact, than a + walk from Hartford to Boston. This was early in November. They + did not delay the matter, for the weather was getting too + uncertain. + + Clemens wrote Redpath: + + DEAR REDPATH,—Rev. J. H. Twichell and I expect to start at 8 + o'clock Thursday morning to walk to Boston in twenty four + hours—or more. We shall telegraph Young's Hotel for rooms + Saturday night, in order to allow for a low average of + pedestrianism. + + It was half past eight on Thursday morning, November 12, 1874, + that they left Twichell's house in a carriage, drove to the East + Hartford bridge, and there took to the road, Twichell carrying a + little bag and Clemens a basket of lunch. + + The papers had got hold of it by this time, and were watching the + result. They did well enough that first day, following the old + Boston stage road, arriving at Westford about seven o'clock in + the evening, twenty-eight miles from the starting-point. There + was no real hotel at Westford, only a sort of tavern, but it + afforded the luxury of rest. “Also,” says Twichell, in a + memoranda of the trip, “a sublimely profane hostler whom you + couldn't jostle with any sort of mild remark without bringing + down upon yourself a perfect avalanche of oaths.” + + This was a joy to Clemens, who sat behind the stove, rubbing his + lame knees and fairly reveling in Twichell's discomfiture in his + efforts to divert the hostler's blasphemy. There was also a + mellow inebriate there who recommended kerosene for Clemens's + lameness, and offered as testimony the fact that he himself had + frequently used it for stiffness in his joints after lying out + all night in cold weather, drunk: altogether it was a notable + evening. + + Westford was about as far as they continued the journey afoot. + Clemens was exceedingly lame next morning, and had had a rather + bad night; but he swore and limped along six miles farther, to + North Ashford, then gave it up. They drove from North Ashford to + the railway, where Clemens telegraphed Redpath and Howells of + their approach. To Redpath: + + We have made thirty-five miles in less than five days. This + demonstrates that the thing can be done. Shall now finish by rail. + Did you have any bets on us? + + To Howells: + + Arrive by rail at seven o'clock, the first of a series of grand + annual pedestrian tours from Hartford to Boston to be performed by + us. The next will take place next year. + + Redpath read his despatch to a lecture audience, with effect. + Howells made immediate preparation for receiving two way-worn, + hungry men. He telegraphed to Young's Hotel: “You and Twichell + come right up to 37 Concord Avenue, Cambridge, near observatory. + Party waiting for you.” + + They got to Howells's about nine o'clock, and the refreshments + were waiting. Miss Longfellow was there, Rose Hawthorne, John + Fiske, Larkin G. Mead, the sculptor, and others of their kind. + Howells tells in his book how Clemens, with Twichell, “suddenly + stormed in,” and immediately began to eat and drink: + + I can see him now as he stood up in the midst of our friends, with + his head thrown back, and in his hand a dish of those escalloped + oysters without which no party in Cambridge was really a party, + exulting in the tale of his adventure, which had abounded in the + most original characters and amusing incidents at every mile of + their progress. + + Clemens gave a dinner, next night, to Howells, Aldrich, Osgood, + and the rest. The papers were full of jokes concerning the Boston + expedition; some even had illustrations, and it was all amusing + enough at the time. + + Next morning, sitting in the writing-room of Young's Hotel, he + wrote a curious letter to Mrs. Clemens, though intended as much + for Howells and Aldrich as for her. It was dated sixty-one years + ahead, and was a sort of Looking Backwards, though that notable + book had not yet been written. It presupposed a monarchy in which + the name of Boston has been changed to “Limerick,” and Hartford + to “Dublin.” In it, Twichell has become the “Archbishop of + Dublin,” Howells “Duke of Cambridge,” Aldrich “Marquis of + Ponkapog,” Clemens the “Earl of Hartford.” It was too whimsical + and delightful a fancy to be forgotten.—[This remarkable and + amusing document will be found under Appendix M, at the end of + last volume.] + + A long time afterward, thirty-four year, he came across this + letter. He said: + + “It seems curious now that I should have been dreaming dreams of + a future monarchy and never suspect that the monarchy was already + present and the Republic a thing of the past.” + + What he meant, was the political succession that had fostered + those commercial trusts which, in turn, had established party + dominion. + + To Howells, on his return, Clemens wrote his acknowledgments, and + added: + + Mrs. Clemens gets upon the verge of swearing, and goes tearing + around in an unseemly fury when I enlarge upon the delightful time + we had in Boston, and she not there to have her share. I have tried + hard to reproduce Mrs. Howells to her, and have probably not made a + shining success of it. + + + + + XCVIII. “OLD TIMES ON THE MISSISSIPPI” + + + Howells had been urging Clemens to do something more for the + Atlantic, specifically something for the January number. Clemens + cudgeled his brains, but finally declared he must give it up: + + Mrs. Clemens has diligently persecuted me day by day with urgings + to go to work and do that something, but it's no use. I find I + can't. We are in such a state of worry and endless confusion that + my head won't go. + + Two hours later he sent another hasty line: + + I take back the remark that I can't write for the January number, + for Twichell and I have had a long walk in the woods, and I got to + telling him about old Mississippi days of steam-boating glory and + grandeur as I saw them (during four years) from the pilot-house. He + said, “What a virgin subject to hurl into a magazine!” I hadn't + thought of that before. Would you like a series of papers to run + through three months or six or nine—or about four months, say? + + Howells welcomed this offer as an echo of his own thought. He had + come from a piloting family himself, and knew the interest that + Mark Twain could put into such a series. + + Acting promptly under the new inspiration, Clemens forthwith sent + the first chapter of that monumental, that absolutely unique, + series of papers on Mississippi River life, which to-day + constitutes one of his chief claims to immortality. + + His first number was in the nature of an experiment. Perhaps, + after all, the idea would not suit the Atlantic readers. + + “Cut it, scarify it, reject it, handle it with entire freedom,” + he wrote, and awaited the result. + + The “result” was that Howells expressed his delight: + + The piece about the Mississippi is capital. It almost made the + water in our ice-pitcher muddy as I read it. I don't think I shall + meddle much with it, even in the way of suggestion. The sketch of + the low-lived little town was so good that I could have wished + there was more of it. I want the sketches, if you can make them, + every month. + + Mark Twain was now really interested in this new literary + venture. He was fairly saturated with memories. He was writing on + the theme that lay nearest to his heart. Within ten days he + reported that he had finished three of the papers, and had begun + the fourth. + + And yet I have spoken of nothing but piloting as a science so + far, and I doubt if I ever get beyond that portion of my subject. + And I don't care to. Any Muggins can write about old days on the + Mississippi of five hundred different kinds, but I am the only + man alive that can scribble about the piloting of that day, and + no man has ever tried to scribble about it yet. Its newness + pleases me all the time, and it is about the only new subject I + know of. + + He became so enthusiastic presently that he wanted to take + Howells with him on a trip down the Mississippi, with their wives + for company, to go over the old ground again and obtain added + material enough for a book. Howells was willing enough—agreed to + go, in fact—but found it hard to get away. He began to temporize + and finally backed out. Clemens tried to inveigle Osgood into the + trip, but without success; also John Hay, but Hay had a new baby + at his house just then—“three days old, and with a voice beyond + price,” he said, offering it as an excuse for non-acceptance. So + the plan for revisiting the river and the conclusion of the book + were held in abeyance for nearly seven years. + + Those early piloting chapters, as they appeared in the Atlantic, + constituted Mark Twain's best literary exhibit up to that time. + In some respects they are his best literature of any time. As + pictures of an intensely interesting phase of life, they are so + convincing, so real, and at the same time of such extraordinary + charm and interest, that if the English language should survive a + thousand years, or ten times as long, they would be as fresh and + vivid at the end of that period as the day they were penned. In + them the atmosphere of, the river and its environment—its + pictures, its thousand aspects of life—are reproduced with what + is no less than literary necromancy. Not only does he make you + smell the river you can fairly hear it breathe. On the appearance + of the first number John Hay wrote: + + “It is perfect; no more nor less. I don't see how you do it,” and + added, “you know what my opinion is of time not spent with you.” + + Howells wrote: + + You are doing the science of piloting splendidly. Every word + interesting, and don't you drop the series till you've got every + bit of anecdote and reminiscence into it. + + He let Clemens write the articles to suit himself. Once he said: + + If I might put in my jaw at this point I should say, stick to + actual fact and character in the thing and give things in detail. + All that belongs to the old river life is novel, and is now mostly + historical. Don't write at any supposed Atlantic audience, but yarn + it off as if into my sympathetic ear. + + Clemens replied that he had no dread of the Atlantic audience; he + declared it was the only audience that did not require a humorist + to “paint himself striped and stand on his head to amuse it.” + + The “Old Times” papers ran through seven numbers of the Atlantic. + They were reprinted everywhere by the newspapers, who in that day + had little respect for magazine copyrights, and were promptly + pirated in book form in Canada. They added vastly to Mark Twain's + literary capital, though Howells informs us that the Atlantic + circulation did not thrive proportionately, for the reason that + the newspapers gave the articles to their readers from advanced + sheets of the magazine, even before the latter could be placed on + sale. It so happened that in the January Atlantic, which + contained the first of the Mississippi papers, there appeared + Robert Dale Owen's article on “Spiritualism,” which brought such + humility both to author and publisher because of the exposure of + the medium Katie King, which came along while the magazine was in + press. Clemens has written this marginal note on the opening page + of the copy at Quarry Farm: + + While this number of the Atlantic was being printed the Katie + King manifestations were discovered to be the cheapest, + wretchedest shams and frauds, and were exposed in the newspapers. + The awful humiliation of it unseated Robert Dale Owen's reason, + and he died in the madhouse. + + + + + XCIX. A TYPEWRITER, AND A JOKE ON ALDRICH + + + It was during the trip to Boston with Twichell that Mark Twain + saw for the first time what was then—a brand-new invention, a + typewriter; or it may have been during a subsequent visit, a week + or two later. At all events, he had the machine and was + practising on it December 9, 1874, for he wrote two letters on it + that day, one to Howells and the other to Orion Clemens. In the + latter he says: + + I am trying to get the hang of this new-fangled writing-machine, + but am not making a shining success of it. However, this is the + first attempt I ever have made, and yet I perceive that I shall + soon easily acquire a fine facility in its use. I saw the thing in + Boston the other day and was greatly taken with it. + + He goes on to explain the new wonder, and on the whole his first + attempt is a very creditable performance. With his usual + enthusiasm over an innovation, he believes it is going to be a + great help to him, and proclaims its advantages. + + This is the letter to Howells, with the errors preserved: + + You needn't answer this; I am only practicing to get three; anothe + slip-up there; only practici?ng ti get the hang of the thing. I + notice I miss fire & get in a good many unnecessary letters & + punctuation marks. I am simply using you for a target to bang at. + Blame my cats, but this thing requires genius in order to work it + just right. + + In an article written long after he tells how he was with Nasby + when he first saw the machine in Boston through a window, and how + they went in to see it perform. In the same article he states + that he was the first person in the world to apply the + type-machine to literature, and that he thinks the story of Tom + Sawyer was the first type-copied manuscript.—[Tom Sawyer was not + then complete, and had been laid aside. The first type-copied + manuscript was probably early chapters of the Mississippi story, + two discarded typewritten pages of which still exist.] + + The new enthusiasm ran its course and died. Three months later, + when the Remington makers wrote him for a recommendation of the + machine, he replied that he had entirely stopped using it. The + typewriter was not perfect in those days, and the keys did not + always respond readily. He declared it was ruining his + morals—that it made him “want to swear.” He offered it to Howells + because, he said, Howells had no morals anyway. Howells + hesitated, so Clemens traded the machine to Bliss for a + side-saddle. But perhaps Bliss also became afraid of its + influence, for in due time he brought it back. Howells, again + tempted, hesitated, and this time was lost. What eventually + became of the machine is not history. + + One of those, happy Atlantic dinners which Howells tells of came + about the end of that year. It was at the Parker House, and + Emerson was there; and Aldrich, and the rest of that group. + + “Don't you dare to refuse the invitation,” said Howells, and + naturally Clemens didn't, and wrote back: + + I want you to ask Mrs. Howells to let you stay all night at the + Parker House and tell lies and have an improving time, and take + breakfast with me in the morning. I will have a good room for you + and a fire. Can't you tell her it always makes you sick to go home + late at night or something like that? That sort of thing arouses + Mrs. Clemens's sympathies easily. + + Two memories of that old dinner remain to-day. Aldrich and + Howells were not satisfied with the kind of neckties that Mark + Twain wore (the old-fashioned black “string” tie, a Western + survival), so they made him a present of two cravats when he set + out on his return for Hartford. Next day he wrote: + + You and Aldrich have made one woman deeply and sincerely grateful + —Mrs. Clemens. For months—I may even say years—she has shown an + unaccountable animosity toward my necktie, even getting up in the + night to take it with the tongs and blackguard it, sometimes also + getting so far as to threaten it. + When I said you and Aldrich had given me two new neckties, and that + they were in a paper in my overcoat pocket, she was in a fever of + happiness until she found I was going to frame them; then all the + venom in her nature gathered itself together; insomuch that I, + being near to a door, went without, perceiving danger. + + It is recorded that eventually he wore the neckties, and returned + no more to the earlier mode. + + Another memory of that dinner is linked to a demand that Aldrich + made of Clemens that night, for his photograph. Clemens, + returning to Hartford, put up fifty-two different specimens in as + many envelopes, with the idea of sending one a week for a year. + Then he concluded that this was too slow a process, and for a + week sent one every morning to “His Grace of Ponkapog.” + + Aldrich stood it for a few days, then protested. “The police,” he + said, “are in the habit of swooping down upon a publication of + that sort.” + + On New-Year's no less than twenty pictures came at + once—photographs and prints of Mark Twain, his house, his family, + his various belongings. Aldrich sent a warning then that the + perpetrator of this outrage was known to the police as Mark + Twain, alias “The Jumping Frog,” a well-known California + desperado, who would be speedily arrested and brought to Ponkapog + to face his victim. This letter was signed “T. Bayleigh, Chief of + Police,” and on the outside of the envelope there was a statement + that it would be useless for that person to send any more + mail-matter, as the post-office had been blown up. The jolly + farce closed there. It was the sort of thing that both men + enjoyed. + + Aldrich was writing a story at this time which contained some + Western mining incident and environment. He sent the manuscript + to Clemens for “expert” consideration and advice. Clemens wrote + him at great length and in careful detail. He was fond of + Aldrich, regarding him as one of the most brilliant of men. Once, + to Robert Louis Stevenson, he said: + + “Aldrich has never had his peer for prompt and pithy and witty and + humorous sayings. None has equaled him, certainly none has + surpassed him, in the felicity of phrasing with which he clothed + these children of his fancy. Aldrich is always brilliant; he can't + help it; he is a fire-opal set round with rose diamonds; when he is + not speaking you know that his dainty fancies are twinkling and + glimmering around in him; when he speaks the diamonds flash. Yes, + he is always brilliant, he will always be brilliant; he will be + brilliant in hell-you will see.” + + Stevenson, smiling a chuckly smile, said, “I hope not.” + + “Well, you will, and he will dim even those ruddy fires and look + like a transfigured Adonis backed against a pink sunset.”—[North + American Review, September, 1906.] + + + + + C. RAYMOND, MENTAL TELEGRAPHY, ETC. + + + The Sellers play was given in Hartford, in January (1875), to as + many people as could crowd into the Opera House. Raymond had + reached the perfection of his art by that time, and the townsmen + of Mark Twain saw the play and the actor at their best. Kate + Field played the part of Laura Hawkins, and there was a Hartford + girl in the company; also a Hartford young man, who would one day + be about as well known to playgoers as any playwright or actor + that America has produced. His name was William Gillette, and it + was largely due to Mark Twain that the author of Secret Service + and of the dramatic “Sherlock Holmes” got a fair public start. + Clemens and his wife loaned Gillette the three thousand dollars + which tided him through his period of dramatic education. Their + faith in his ability was justified. + + Hartford would naturally be enthusiastic on a first + “Sellers-Raymond” night. At the end of the fourth act there was + an urgent demand for the author of the play, who was supposed to + be present. He was not there in person, but had sent a letter, + which Raymond read: + + MY DEAR RAYMOND,—I am aware that you are going to be welcomed to + our town by great audiences on both nights of your stay there, + and I beg to add my hearty welcome also, through this note. I + cannot come to the theater on either evening, Raymond, because + there is something so touching about your acting that I can't + stand it. + + (I do not mention a couple of colds in my head, because I hardly + mind them as much as I would the erysipelas, but between you and + me I would prefer it if they were rights and lefts.) + + And then there is another thing. I have always taken a pride in + earning my living in outside places and spending it in Hartford; + I have said that no good citizen would live on his own people, + but go forth and make it sultry for other communities and fetch + home the result; and now at this late day I find myself in the + crushed and bleeding position of fattening myself upon the spoils + of my brethren! Can I support such grief as this? (This is + literary emotion, you understand. Take the money at the door just + the same.) + + Once more I welcome you to Hartford, Raymond, but as for me let + me stay at home and blush. + + Yours truly, MARK. + + The play was equally successful wherever it went. It made what in + that day was regarded as a fortune. One hundred thousand dollars + is hardly too large an estimate of the amount divided between + author and actor. Raymond was a great actor in that part, as he + interpreted it, though he did not interpret it fully, or always + in its best way. The finer side, the subtle, tender side of + Colonel Sellers, he was likely to overlook. Yet, with a natural + human self-estimate, Raymond believed he had created a much + greater part than Mark Twain had written. Doubtless from the + point of view of a number of people this was so, though the idea, + was naturally obnoxious to Clemens. In course of time their + personal relations ceased. + + Clemens that winter gave another benefit for Father Hawley. In + reply to an invitation to appear in behalf of the poor, he wrote + that he had quit the lecture field, and would not return to the + platform unless driven there by lack of bread. But he added: + + By the spirit of that remark I am debarred from delivering this + proposed lecture, and so I fall back upon the letter of it, and + emerge upon the platform for this last and final time because I + am confronted by a lack of bread-among Father Hawley's flock. + + He made an introductory speech at an old-fashioned spelling-bee, + given at the Asylum Hill Church; a breezy, charming talk of which + the following is a sample: + + I don't see any use in spelling a word right—and never did. I mean + I don't see any use in having a uniform and arbitrary way of + spelling words. We might as well make all clothes alike and cook + all dishes alike. Sameness is tiresome; variety is pleasing. I have + a correspondent whose letters are always a refreshment to me; there + is such a breezy, unfettered originality about his orthography. He + always spells “kow” with a large “K.” Now that is just as good as + to spell it with a small one. It is better. It gives the + imagination a broader field, a wider scope. It suggests to the mind + a grand, vague, impressive new kind of a cow. + He took part in the contest, and in spite of his early reputation, + was spelled down on the word “chaldron,” which he spelled + “cauldron,” as he had been taught, while the dictionary used as + authority gave that form as second choice. + + Another time that winter, Clemens read before the Monday Evening + Club a paper on “Universal Suffrage,” which is still remembered + by the surviving members of that time. A paragraph or two will + convey its purport: + + Our marvelous latter-day statesmanship has invented universal + suffrage. That is the finest feather in our cap. All that we + require of a voter is that he shall be forked, wear pantaloons + instead of petticoats, and bear a more or less humorous resemblance + to the reported image of God. He need not know anything whatever; + he may be wholly useless and a cumberer of the earth; he may even + be known to be a consummate scoundrel. No matter. While he can + steer clear of the penitentiary his vote is as weighty as the vote + of a president, a bishop, a college professor, a merchant prince. + We brag of our universal, unrestricted suffrage; but we are shams + after all, for we restrict when we come to the women. + + The Monday Evening Club was an organization which included the + best minds of Hartford. Dr. Horace Bushnell, Prof. Calvin E. + Stowe, and J. Hammond Trumbull founded it back in the sixties, + and it included such men as Rev. Dr. Parker, Rev. Dr. Burton, + Charles H. Clark, of the Courant, Warner, and Twichell, with + others of their kind. Clemens had been elected after his first + sojourn in England (February, 1873), and had then read a paper on + the “License of the Press.” The club met alternate Mondays, from + October to May. There was one paper for each evening, and, after + the usual fashion of such clubs, the reading was followed by + discussion. Members of that time agree that Mark Twain's + association with the club had a tendency to give it a life, or at + least an exhilaration, which it had not previously known. His + papers were serious in their purpose he always preferred to be + serious—but they evidenced the magic gift which made whatever he + touched turn to literary jewelry. + + Psychic theories and phenomena always attracted Mark Twain. In + thought-transference, especially, he had a frank interest—an + interest awakened and kept alive by certain phenomena—psychic + manifestations we call them now. In his association with Mrs. + Clemens it not infrequently happened that one spoke the other's + thought, or perhaps a long-procrastinated letter to a friend + would bring an answer as quickly as mailed; but these are things + familiar to us all. A more startling example of + thought-communication developed at the time of which we are + writing, an example which raised to a fever-point whatever + interest he may have had in the subject before. (He was always + having these vehement interests—rages we may call them, for it + would be inadequate to speak of them as fads, inasmuch as they + tended in the direction of human enlightenment, or progress, or + reform.) + + Clemens one morning was lying in bed when, as he says, “suddenly + a red-hot new idea came whistling down into my camp.” The idea + was that the time was ripe for a book that would tell the story + of the Comstock-of the Nevada silver mines. It seemed to him that + the person best qualified for the work was his old friend William + Wright—Dan de Quille. He had not heard from Dan, or of him, for a + long time, but decided to write and urge him to take up the idea. + He prepared the letter, going fully into the details of his plan, + as was natural for him to do, then laid it aside until he could + see Bliss and secure his approval of the scheme from a publishing + standpoint. Just a week later, it was the 9th of March, a letter + came—a thick letter bearing a Nevada postmark, and addressed in a + handwriting which he presently recognized as De Quille's. To a + visitor who was present he said: + + “Now I will do a miracle. I will tell you everything this letter + contains—date, signature, and all without breaking the seal.” + + He stated what he believed was in the letter. Then he opened it + and showed that he had correctly given its contents, which were + the same in all essential details as those of his own letter, not + yet mailed. + + In an article on “Mental Telegraphy” (he invented the name) he + relates this instance, with others, and in 'Following the + Equator' and elsewhere he records other such happenings. It was + one of the “mysteries” in which he never lost interest, though + his concern in it in time became a passive one. + + The result of the De Quille manifestation, however, he has not + recorded. Clemens immediately wrote, urging Dan to come to + Hartford for an extended visit. De Quille came, and put in a + happy spring in his old comrade's luxurious home, writing 'The + Big Bonanza', which Bliss successfully published a year later. + + Mark Twain was continually inviting old friends to share his + success with him. Any comrade of former days found welcome in his + home as often as he would come, and for as long as he would stay. + Clemens dropped his own affairs to advise in their undertakings; + and if their undertakings were literary he found them a + publisher. He did this for Joaquin Miller and for Bret Harte, and + he was always urging Goodman to make his house a home. + + The Beecher-Tilton trial was the sensation of the spring of 1875, + and Clemens, in common with many others, was greatly worked up + over it. The printed testimony had left him decidedly in doubt as + to Beecher's innocence, though his blame would seem to have been + less for the possible offense than because of the great leader's + attitude in the matter. To Twichell he said: + + “His quibbling was fatal. Innocent or guilty, he should have made + an unqualified statement in the beginning.” + + Together they attended one of the sessions, on a day when Beecher + himself was on the witness-stand. The tension was very great; the + excitement was painful. Twichell thought that Beecher appeared + well under the stress of examination and was deeply sorry for + him; Clemens was far from convinced. + + The feeling was especially strong in Hartford, where Henry Ward + Beecher's relatives were prominent, and animosities grew out of + it. They are all forgotten now; most of those who cherished + bitterness are dead. Any feeling that Clemens had in the matter + lasted but a little while. Howells tells us that when he met him + some months after the trial ended, and was tempted to mention it, + Clemens discouraged any discussion of the event. Says Howells: + + He would only say the man had suffered enough; as if the man had + expiated his wrong, and he was not going to do anything to renew + his penalty. I found that very curious, very delicate. His + continued blame could not come to the sufferer's knowledge, but he + felt it his duty to forbear it. + + It was one hundred years, that 19th of April, since the battles + of Lexington and Concord, and there was to be a great + celebration. The Howellses had visited Hartford in March, and the + Clemenses were invited to Cambridge for the celebration. Only + Clemens could go, which in the event proved a good thing perhaps; + for when Clemens and Howells set out for Concord they did not go + over to Boston to take the train, but decided to wait for it at + Cambridge. Apparently it did not occur to them that the train + would be jammed the moment the doors were opened at the Boston + station; but when it came along they saw how hopeless was their + chance. They had special invitations and passage from Boston, but + these were only mockeries now. It yeas cold and chilly, and they + forlornly set out in search of some sort of a conveyance. They + tramped around in the mud and raw wind, but vehicles were either + filled or engaged, and drivers and occupants were inclined to + jeer at them. Clemens was taken with an acute attack of + indigestion, which made him rather dismal and savage. Their + effort finally ended with his trying to run down a tally-ho which + was empty inside and had a party of Harvard students riding atop. + The students, who did not recognize their would-be fare, enjoyed + the race. They encouraged their pursuer, and perhaps their + driver, with merriment and cheers. Clemens was handicapped by + having to run in the slippery mud, and soon “dropped by the + wayside.” + + “I am glad,” says Howells, “I cannot recall what he said when he + came back to me.” + + They hung about a little longer, then dragged themselves home, + slipped into the house, and built up a fine, cheerful fire on the + hearth. They proposed to practise a deception on Mrs. Howells by + pretending they had been to Concord and returned. But it was no + use. Their statements were flimsy, and guilt was plainly written + on their faces. Howells recalls this incident delightfully, and + expresses the belief that the humor of the situation was finally + a greater pleasure to Clemens than the actual visit to Concord + would have been. + + Twichell did not have any such trouble in attending the + celebration. He had adventures (he was always having adventures), + but they were of a more successful kind. Clemens heard the tale + of them when he returned to Hartford. He wrote it to Howells: + + Joe Twichell preached morning and evening here last Sunday; took + midnight train for Boston; got an early breakfast and started by + rail at 7.30 A.M. for Concord; swelled around there until 1 P.M., + seeing everything; then traveled on top of a train to Lexington; + saw everything there; traveled on top of a train to Boston (with + hundreds in company), deluged with dust, smoke, and cinders; yelled + and hurrahed all the way like a school-boy; lay flat down, to dodge + numerous bridges, and sailed into the depot howling with excitement + and as black as a chimneysweep; got to Young's Hotel at 7 P.M.; sat + down in the reading-room and immediately fell asleep; was promptly + awakened by a porter, who supposed he was drunk; wandered around an + hour and a half; then took 9 P.M. train, sat down in a smoking-car, + and remembered nothing more until awakened by conductor as the + train came into Hartford at 1.30 A.M. Thinks he had simply a + glorious time, and wouldn't have missed the Centennial for the + world. He would have run out to see us a moment at Cambridge but he + was too dirty. I wouldn't have wanted him there; his appalling + energy would have been an insufferable reproach to mild adventurers + like you and me. + + + + + CI. CONCLUDING “TOM SAWYER”—MARK TWAIN's “EDITORS” + + + Meantime the “inspiration tank,” as Clemens sometimes called it, + had filled up again. He had received from somewhere new afflatus + for the story of Tom and Huck, and was working on it steadily. + The family remained in Hartford, and early in July, under full + head of steam, he brought the story to a close. On the 5th he + wrote Howells: + + I have finished the story and didn't take the chap beyond boyhood. + I believe it would be fatal to do it in any shape but + autobiographically, like Gil Blas. I perhaps made a mistake in not + writing it in the first person. If I went on now, and took him into + manhood, he would just lie, like all the one-horse men in + literature, and the reader would conceive a hearty contempt for + him. It is not a boy's book at all. It will only be read by adults. + It is only written for adults. + + He would like to see the story in the Atlantic, he said, but + doubted the wisdom of serialization. + + “By and by I shall take a boy of twelve and run him through life + (in the first person), but not Tom Sawyer, he would not make a + good character for it.” From which we get the first glimpse of + Huck's later adventures. + + Of course he wanted Howells to look at the story. It was a + tremendous favor to ask, he said, and added, “But I know of no + other person whose judgment I could venture to take, fully and + entirely. Don't hesitate to say no, for I know how your time is + taxed, and I would have honest need to blush if you said yes.” + + “Send on your MS.,” wrote Howells. “You've no idea what I may ask + you to do for me some day.” + + But Clemens, conscience-stricken, “blushed and weakened,” as he + said. When Howells insisted, he wrote: + + But I will gladly send it to you if you will do as follows: + dramatize it, if you perceive that you can, and take, for your + remuneration, half of the first $6,000 which I receive for its + representation on the stage. You could alter the plot entirely if + you chose. I could help in the work most cheerfully after you had + arranged the plot. I have my eye upon two young girls who can play + Tom and Huck. + + Howells in his reply urged Clemens to do the playwriting himself. + He could never find time, he said, and he doubted whether he + could enter into the spirit of another man's story. Clemens did + begin a dramatization then or a little later, but it was not + completed. Mrs. Clemens, to whom he had read the story as it + proceeded, was as anxious as her husband for Howells's opinion, + for it was the first extended piece of fiction Mark Twain had + undertaken alone. He carried the manuscript over to Boston + himself, and whatever their doubts may have been, Howells's + subsequent letter set them at rest. He wrote that he had sat up + till one in the morning to get to the end of it, simply because + it was impossible to leave off. + + It is altogether the best boy story I ever read. It will be an + immense success, but I think you ought to treat it explicitly as + a boy's story; grown-ups will enjoy it just as much if you do, + and if you should put it forth as a story of boys' character from + the grown-up point of view you give the wrong key to it. + + Viewed in the light of later events, there has never been any + better literary opinion than that—none that has been more fully + justified. + + Clemens was delighted. He wrote concerning a point here and + there, one inquiry referring to the use of a certain strong word. + Howells's reply left no doubt: + + I'd have that swearing out in an instant. I suppose I didn't notice + it because the location was so familiar to my Western sense, and so + exactly the thing Huck would say, but it won't do for children. + + It was in the last chapter, where Huck relates to Tom the sorrows + of reform and tells how they comb him “all to thunder.” In the + original, “They comb me all to hell,” says Huck; which statement, + one must agree, is more effective, more the thing Huck would be + likely to say. + + Clemens's acknowledgment of the correction was characteristic: + + Mrs. Clemens received the mail this morning, and the next minute + she lit into the study with danger in her eye and this demand on + her tongue, “Where is the profanity Mr. Howells speaks of?” Then I + had to miserably confess that I had left it out when reading the + MS. to her. Nothing but almost inspired lying got me out of this + scrape with my scalp. Does your wife give you rats, like that, when + you go a little one-sided? + + The Clemens family did not go to Elmira that year. The children's + health seemed to require the sea-shore, and in August they went + to Bateman's Point, Rhode Island, where Clemens most of the time + played tenpins in an alley that had gone to ruin. The balls would + not stay on the track; the pins stood at inebriate angles. It + reminded him of the old billiard-tables of Western mining-camps, + and furnished the same uncertainty of play. It was his delight, + after he had become accustomed to the eccentricities of the + alley, to invite in a stranger and watch his suffering and his + frantic effort to score. + + + + + CII. “SKETCHES NEW AND OLD” + + + The long-delayed book of Sketches, contracted for five years + before, was issued that autumn. “The Jumping Frog,” which he had + bought from Webb, was included in the volume, also the French + translation which Madame Blanc (Th. Bentzon) had made for the + Revue des deux mondes, with Mark Twain's retranslation back into + English, a most astonishing performance in its literal rendition + of the French idiom. One example will suffice here. It is where + the stranger says to Smiley, “I don't see no p'ints about that + frog that's any better'n any other frog.” + + Says the French, retranslated: + + “Eh bien! I no saw not that that frog had nothing of better than + each frog” (Je ne vois pas que cette grenouille ait mieux + qu'aucune grenouille). (If that isn't grammar gone to seed then I + count myself no judge.—M. T.) + + “Possible that you not it saw not,” said Smiley; “possible that + you you comprehend frogs; possible that you not you there + comprehend nothing; possible that you had of the experience, and + possible that you not be but an amateur. Of all manner (de toute + maniere) I bet forty dollars that she batter in jumping, no + matter which frog of the county of Calaveras.” + + He included a number of sketches originally published with the + Frog, also a selection from the “Memoranda” and Buffalo Express + contributions, and he put in the story of Auntie Cord, with some + matter which had never hitherto appeared. True Williams + illustrated the book, but either it furnished him no inspiration + or he was allowed too much of another sort, for the pictures do + not compare with his earlier work. + + Among the new matter in the book were-“Some Fables for Good Old + Boys and Girls,” in which certain wood creatures are supposed to + make a scientific excursion into a place at some time occupied by + men. It is the most pretentious feature of the book, and in its + way about as good as any. Like Gulliver's Travels, its object was + satire, but its result is also interest. + + Clemens was very anxious that Howells should be first to review + this volume. He had a superstition that Howells's verdicts were + echoed by the lesser reviewers, and that a book was made or + damned accordingly; a belief hardly warranted, for the review has + seldom been written that meant to any book the difference between + success and failure. Howells's review of Sketches may be offered + as a case in point. It was highly commendatory, much more so than + the notice of the 'Innocents' had been, or even that of 'Roughing + It', also more extensive than the latter. Yet after the initial + sale of some twenty thousand copies, mainly on the strength of + the author's reputation, the book made a comparatively poor + showing, and soon lagged far behind its predecessors. + + We cannot judge, of course, the taste of that day, but it appears + now an unattractive, incoherent volume. The pictures were + absurdly bad, the sketches were of unequal merit. Many of them + are amusing, some of them delightful, but most of them seem + ephemeral. If we except “The Jumping Frog,” and possibly “A True + Story” (and the latter was altogether out of place in the + collection), there is no reason to suppose that any of its + contents will escape oblivion. The greater number of the + sketches, as Mark Twain himself presently realized and declared, + would better have been allowed to die. + + Howells did, however, take occasion to point out in his review, + or at least to suggest, the more serious side of Mark Twain. He + particularly called attention to “A True Story,” which the + reviewers, at the time of its publication in the Atlantic, had + treated lightly, fearing a lurking joke in it; or it may be they + had not read it, for reviewers are busy people. Howells spoke of + it as the choicest piece of work in the volume, and of its + “perfect fidelity to the tragic fact.” He urged the reader to + turn to it again, and to read it as a “simple dramatic report of + reality,” such as had been equaled by no other American writer. + + It was in this volume of sketches that Mark Twain first spoke in + print concerning copyright, showing the absurd injustice of + discriminating against literary ownership by statute of + limitation. He did this in the form of an open petition to + Congress, asking that all property, real and personal, should be + put on the copyright basis, its period of ownership limited to a + “beneficent term of forty-two years.” Generally this was regarded + as a joke, as in a sense it was; but like most of Mark Twain's + jokes it was founded on reason and justice. + + The approval with which it was received by his literary + associates led him to still further flights. He began a + determined crusade for international copyright laws. It was a + transcendental beginning, but it contained the germ of what, in + the course of time, he would be largely instrumental in bringing + to a ripe and magnificent conclusion. In this first effort he + framed a petition to enact laws by which the United States would + declare itself to be for right and justice, regardless of other + nations, and become a good example to the world by refusing to + pirate the books of any foreign author. He wrote to Howells, + urging him to get Lowell, Longfellow, Holmes, Whittier, and + others to sign this petition. + + I will then put a gentlemanly chap under wages, and send him + personally to every author of distinction in the country and + corral the rest of the signatures. Then I'll have the whole thing + lithographed (about one thousand copies), and move upon the + President and Congress in person, but in the subordinate capacity + of the party who is merely the agent of better and wiser men, or + men whom the country cannot venture to laugh at. I will ask the + President to recommend the thing in his message (and if he should + ask me to sit down and frame the paragraph for him I should + blush, but still I would frame it). And then if Europe chooses to + go on stealing from us we would say, with noble enthusiasm, + “American lawmakers do steal, but not from foreign authors—not + from foreign authors,”.... If we only had some God in the + country's laws, instead of being in such a sweat to get Him into + the Constitution, it would be better all around. + + The petition never reached Congress. Holmes agreed to sign it + with a smile, and the comment that governments were not in the + habit of setting themselves up as high moral examples, except for + revenue. Longfellow also pledged himself, as did a few others; + but if there was any general concurrence in the effort there is + no memory of it now. Clemens abandoned the original idea, but + remained one of the most persistent and influential advocates of + copyright betterment, and lived to see most of his dream + fulfilled.—[For the petition concerning copyright term in the + United States, see Sketches New and Old. For the petition + concerning international copyright and related matters, see + Appendix N, at the end of last volume.] + + + + + CIII. “ATLANTIC” DAYS + + + It was about this period that Mark Twain began to exhibit openly + his more serious side; that is to say his advocacy of public + reforms. His paper on “Universal Suffrage” had sounded a first + note, and his copyright petitions were of the same spirit. In + later years he used to say that he had always felt it was his + mission to teach, to carry the banner of moral reconstruction, + and here at forty we find him furnishing evidences of this + inclination. In the Atlantic for October, 1875, there was + published an unsigned three-page article entitled, “The Curious + Republic of Gondour.” In this article was developed the idea that + the voting privilege should be estimated not by the individuals, + but by their intellectual qualifications. The republic of Gondour + was a Utopia, where this plan had been established: + + It was an odd idea and ingenious. You must understand the + constitution gave every man a vote; therefore that vote was a + vested right, and could not be taken away. But the constitution did + not say that certain individuals might not be given two votes or + ten. So an amendatory clause was inserted in a quiet way, a clause + which authorized the enlargement of the suffrage in certain cases + to be specified by statute.... + The victory was complete. The new law was framed and passed. Under + it every citizen, howsoever poor or ignorant, possessed one vote, + so universal suffrage still reigned; but if a man possessed a good + common-school education and no money he had two votes, a + high-school education gave him four; if he had property, likewise, + to the value of three thousand sacos he wielded one more vote; for + every fifty thousand sacos a man added to his property, he was + entitled to another vote; a University education entitled a man to + nine votes, even though he owned no property. + + The author goes on to show the beneficent results of this + enaction; how the country was benefited and glorified by this + stimulus toward enlightenment and industry. No one ever suspected + that Mark Twain was the author of this fable. It contained almost + no trace of his usual literary manner. Nevertheless he wrote it, + and only withheld his name, as he did in a few other instances, + in the fear that the world might refuse to take him seriously + over his own signature or nom de plume. + + Howells urged him to follow up the “Gondour” paper; to send some + more reports from that model land. But Clemens was engaged in + other things by that time, and was not pledged altogether to + national reforms. + + He was writing a skit about a bit of doggerel which was then + making nights and days unhappy for many undeserving persons who + in an evil moment had fallen upon it in some stray newspaper + corner. A certain car line had recently adopted the “punch + system,” and posted in its cars, for the information of + passengers and conductor, this placard: + + A Blue Trip Slip for an 8 Cents Fare, A Buff Trip Slip for a 6 + Cents Fare, A Pink Trip Slip for a 3 Cents Fare, For Coupon And + Transfer, Punch The Tickets. + + Noah Brooks and Isaac Bromley were riding down-town one evening + on the Fourth Avenue line, when Bromley said: + + “Brooks, it's poetry. By George, it's poetry!” + + Brooks followed the direction of Bromley's finger and read the + card of instructions. They began perfecting the poetic character + of the notice, giving it still more of a rhythmic twist and + jingle; arrived at the Tribune office, W. C. Wyckoff, scientific + editor, and Moses P. Handy lent intellectual and poetic + assistance, with this result: + + Conductor, when you receive a fare, + Punch in the presence of the passenjare! A blue trip slip for an + eight-cent fare, A buff trip slip for a six-cent fare, A pink + trip slip for a three-cent fare. Punch in the presence of the + passenjare! + CHORUS Punch, brothers! Punch with care! Punch in the presence of + the passenjare! + + It was printed, and street-car poetry became popular. Different + papers had a turn at it, and each usually preceded its own effort + with all other examples, as far as perpetrated. Clemens + discovered the lines, and on one of their walks recited them to + Twichell. “A Literary Nightmare” was written a few days later. In + it the author tells how the jingle took instant and entire + possession of him and went waltzing through his brain; how, when + he had finished his breakfast, he couldn't tell whether he had + eaten anything or not; and how, when he went to finish the novel + he was writing, and took up his pen, he could only get it to say: + + Punch in the presence of the passenjare. + + He found relief at last in telling it to his reverend friend, + that is, Twichell, upon whom he unloaded it with sad results. + + It was an amusing and timely skit, and is worth reading to-day. + Its publication in the Atlantic had the effect of waking up + horse-car poetry all over the world. Howells, going to dine at + Ernest Longfellow's the day following its appearance, heard his + host and Tom Appleton urging each other to “Punch with care.” The + Longfellow ladies had it by heart. Boston was devastated by it. + At home, Howells's children recited it to him in chorus. The + streets were full of it; in Harvard it became an epidemic. + + It was transformed into other tongues. Even Swinburne, the + musical, is said to have done a French version for the 'Revue des + deux mondes'. * A St. Louis magazine, The Western, found relief + in a Latin anthem with this chorus: + + Pungite, fratres, pungite, Pungite cum amore, Pungite pro + vectore, Diligentissime pungite. + + * LE CHANT DU CONDUCTEUR + Ayant ete paye, le conducteur Percera en pleine vue du + voyageur, Quand il regoit trois sous un coupon vert, Un + coupon jaune pour six sous c'est l'affaire, Et pour huit + sous c'est un coupon couleur De rose, en pleine vue du + voyageur. + CHOEUR Donc, percez soigneusement, mes freres Tout en pleine vue + des voyageurs, etc. + + + + + CIV. MARK TWAIN AND HIS WIFE + + + Clemens and his wife traveled to Boston for one of those happy + fore-gatherings with the Howellses, which continued, at one end + of the journey or another, for so many years. There was a + luncheon with Longfellow at Craigie House, and, on the return to + Hartford, Clemens reported to Howells how Mrs. Clemens had + thrived on the happiness of the visit. Also he confesses his + punishment for the usual crimes: + + I “caught it” for letting Mrs. Howells bother and bother about her + coffee, when it was a “good deal better than we get at home.” I + “caught it” for interrupting Mrs. C. at the last moment and losing + her the opportunity to urge you not to forget to send her that MS. + when the printers are done with it. I “caught it” once more for + personating that drunken Colonel James. I “caught it” for + mentioning that Mr. Longfellow's picture was slightly damaged; and + when, after a lull in the storm, I confessed, shamefacedly, that I + had privately suggested to you that we hadn't any frames, and that + if you wouldn't mind hinting to Mr. Houghton, etc., etc., etc., the + madam was simply speechless for the space of a minute. Then she + said: + “How could you, Youth! The idea of sending Mr. Howells, with his + sensitive nature, upon such a repulsive er—” + “Oh, Howells won't mind it! You don't know Howells. Howells is a + man who—” + She was gone. But George was the first person she stumbled on in + the hall, so she took it out of George. I am glad of that, because + it saved the babies. + + Clemens used to admit, at a later day, that his education did not + advance by leaps and bounds, but gradually, very gradually; and + it used to give him a pathetic relief in those after-years, when + that sweet presence had gone out of his life, to tell the way of + it, to confess over-fully, perhaps, what a responsibility he had + been to her. + + He used to tell how, for a long time, he concealed his profanity + from her; how one morning, when he thought the door was shut + between their bedroom and the bathroom, he was in there dressing + and shaving, accompanying these trying things with language + intended only for the strictest privacy; how presently, when he + discovered a button off the shirt he intended to put on, he + hurled it through the window into the yard with appropriate + remarks, followed it with another shirt that was in the same + condition, and added certain collars and neckties and bath-room + requisites, decorating the shrubbery outside, where the people + were going by to church; how in this extreme moment he heard a + slight cough and turned to find that the door was open! There was + only one door to the bath-room, and he knew he had to pass her. + He felt pale and sick, and sat down for a few moments to + consider. He decided to assume that she was asleep, and to walk + out and through the room, head up, as if he had nothing on his + conscience. He attempted it, but without success. Half-way across + the room he heard a voice suddenly repeat his last terrific + remark. He turned to see her sitting up in bed, regarding him + with a look as withering as she could find in her gentle soul. + The humor of it struck him. + + “Livy,” he said, “did it sound like that?” + + “Of course it did,” she said, “only worse. I wanted you to hear + just how it sounded.” + + “Livy,” he said, “it would pain me to think that when I swear it + sounds like that. You got the words right, Livy, but you don't + know the tune.” + + Yet he never willingly gave her pain, and he adored her and + gloried in her dominion, his life long. Howells speaks of his + beautiful and tender loyalty to her as the “most moving quality + of his most faithful soul.” + + It was a greater part of him than the love of most men for their + wives, and she merited all the worship he could give her, all the + devotion, all the implicit obedience, by her surpassing force and + beauty of character. + + She guarded his work sacredly; and reviewing the manuscripts + which he was induced to discard, and certain edited manuscripts, + one gets a partial idea of what the reading world owes to Olivia + Clemens. Of the discarded manuscripts (he seems seldom to have + destroyed them) there are a multitude, and among them all + scarcely one that is not a proof of her sanity and high regard + for his literary honor. They are amusing—some of them; they are + interesting—some of them; they are strong and virile—some of + them; but they are unworthy—most of them, though a number remain + unfinished because theme or interest failed. + + Mark Twain was likely to write not wisely but too much, piling up + hundreds of manuscript pages only because his brain was thronging + as with a myriad of fireflies, a swarm of darting, flashing ideas + demanding release. As often as not he began writing with only a + nebulous idea of what he proposed to do. He would start with a + few characters and situations, trusting in Providence to supply + material as needed. So he was likely to run ashore any time. As + for those other attempts—stories “unavailable” for one reason or + another—he was just as apt to begin those as the better sort, for + somehow he could never tell the difference. That is one of the + hall-marks of genius—the thing which sharply differentiates + genius from talent. Genius is likely to rate a literary disaster + as its best work. Talent rarely makes that mistake. + + Among the abandoned literary undertakings of these early years of + authorship there is the beginning of what was doubtless intended + to become a book, “The Second Advent,” a story which opens with a + very doubtful miraculous conception in Arkansas, and leads only + to grotesquery and literary disorder. There is another, “The + Autobiography of a Damn Fool,” a burlesque on family history, + hopelessly impossible; yet he began it with vast enthusiasm and, + until he allowed her to see the manuscript, thought it especially + good. “Livy wouldn't have it,” he said, “so I gave it up.” There + is another, “The Mysterious Chamber,” strong and fine in + conception, vividly and intensely interesting; the story of a + young lover who is accidentally locked behind a secret door in an + old castle and cannot announce himself. He wanders at last down + into subterranean passages beneath the castle, and he lives in + this isolation for twenty years. The question of sustenance was + the weak point in the story. Clemens could invent no way of + providing it, except by means of a waste or conduit from the + kitchen into which scraps of meat, bread, and other items of + garbage were thrown. This he thought sufficient, but Mrs. Clemens + did not highly regard such a literary device. Clemens could think + of no good way to improve upon it, so this effort too was + consigned to the penal colony, a set of pigeonholes kept in his + study. To Howells and others, when they came along, he would read + the discarded yarns, and they were delightful enough for such a + purpose, as delightful as the sketches which every artist has, + turned face to the wall. + + “Captain Stormfield” lay under the ban for many a year, though + never entirely abandoned. This manuscript was even recommended + for publication by Howells, who has since admitted that it would + not have done then; and indeed, in its original, primitive + nakedness it would hardly have done even in this day of wider + toleration. + + It should be said here that there is not the least evidence (and + the manuscripts are full of evidence) that Mrs. Clemens was ever + super-sensitive, or narrow, or unliterary in her restraints. She + became his public, as it were, and no man ever had a more + open-minded, clear-headed public than that. For Mark Twain's + reputation it would have been better had she exercised her + editorial prerogative even more actively—if, in her love for him + and her jealousy of his reputation, she had been even more + severe. She did all that lay in her strength, from the beginning + to the end, and if we dwell upon this phase of their life + together it is because it is so large a part of Mark Twain's + literary story. On her birthday in the year we are now closing + (1875) he wrote her a letter which conveys an acknowledgment of + his debt. + + LIVY DARLING,—Six years have gone by since I made my first great + success in life and won you, and thirty years have passed since + Providence made preparation for that happy success by sending you + into the world. Every day we live together adds to the security + of my confidence that we can never any more wish to be separated + than we can imagine a regret that we were ever joined. You are + dearer to me to-day, my child, than you were upon the last + anniversary of this birthday; you were dearer then than you were + a year before; you have grown more and more dear from the first + of those anniversaries, and I do not doubt that this precious + progression will continue on to the end. + + Let us look forward to the coming anniversaries, with their age + and their gray hairs, without fear and without depression, + trusting and believing that the love we bear each other will be + sufficient to make them blessed. + + So, with abounding affection for you and our babies I hail this + day that brings you the matronly grace and dignity of three + decades! + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Mark Twain, A Biography, Vol. 1, Part 2, 1866-1875, by Albert Bigelow Paine + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY *** + +***** This file should be named 2983-0.txt or 2983-0.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/9/8/2983/ + +Produced by David Widger + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will +be renamed. + +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. 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