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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Neighbor Nelly Socks, by Sarah L. Barrow
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Neighbor Nelly Socks
+       Being the Sixth and Last Book of the Series
+
+Author: Sarah L. Barrow
+
+Release Date: August 3, 2009 [EBook #29597]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NEIGHBOR NELLY SOCKS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Edwards, Emmy and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: OUR PARTY.]
+
+
+
+
+THE SOCK STORIES,
+
+BY "AUNT FANNY'S" DAUGHTER.
+
+NEIGHBOR NELLY SOCKS:
+
+BEING
+
+THE SIXTH AND LAST BOOK OF THE SERIES.
+
+BY
+
+"AUNT FANNY'S" DAUGHTER,
+
+THE AUTHOR OF "THE LITTLE WHITE ANGEL."
+
+          NEW YORK:
+          LEAVITT & ALLEN, 21 & 23 MERCER ST.
+          1863.
+
+  ENTERED, according to Act of Congress, in the year 1862, by
+  S. L. BARROW,
+
+  In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States
+      for the
+  Southern District of New York.
+
+
+          JOHN F. TROW,
+          PRINTER, STEREOTYPER, AND ELECTROTYPER,
+          50 Greene Street, New York.
+
+
+
+
+                            TO
+
+                      MY DEAR FATHER,
+
+          TO WHOSE KINDLY AND CHARMING WAYS WITH THE
+
+                      "LITTLE FOLK"
+
+          I OWE THE CHARACTER OF "NEIGHBOR OLDBIRD,"
+
+                        THIS BOOK
+
+                  IS LOVINGLY DEDICATED.
+
+
+
+
+CONTEXTS OF VOL. VI.
+
+                                            PAGE
+
+          NEIGHBOR NELLY. IN THREE STORIES.
+
+          1. THE OLD BACHELOR'S STORY,        7
+
+          2. THE BIG BOY'S STORY,            45
+
+          3. THE FAT GENTLEMAN'S STORY,      86
+
+          POSTSCRIPT BY THE OLD BACHELOR,    90
+
+          CONCLUSION,                       132
+
+
+
+
+NEIGHBOR NELLY.
+
+IN THREE STORIES.
+
+
+
+
+THE OLD BACHELOR'S STORY.
+
+
+IN the city block where I live, there are just twenty-four houses on the
+other side of the street, and twenty-four on this side, six lamp posts,
+and eight ailanthus trees in green boxes. Oh, dear me, what a tiresome
+row! That's what I thought when I first came to lodge here; for, as I am
+an old bachelor, I don't want a whole house to myself; but now, when I
+sit at my window and look out at the street, I find no end of things to
+amuse and interest me; particularly when the gas is lighted of an
+evening, and I can see a little way into the parlors of the opposite
+neighbors. I suppose they know that an old bachelor like Josiah Oldbird
+can do no harm by looking on at their evening amusements; so they do not
+pull the blinds down if they chance to see me, sitting lonely at my
+window, and willing to accept such crumbs of their society and happiness
+as I can glean over the way.
+
+First, then, is the family at No. 7, three maiden sisters and a bachelor
+brother. As I don't in the least know their names, I have dubbed them
+the Bluejays, because the three maiden sisters always wear blue merino
+gowns in winter, and blue muslin ones in summer; and because they are
+all so fond of singing that no family of birds could be more musical.
+They have a pet poodle and a pet squirrel, too. The poodle is very fat,
+and his hair sticks out so much all over him, that he looks perpetually
+astonished, as if he had just seen a spook. He always stands on the
+window sill, when the sash is raised of an afternoon, and glares into
+the street until he sees the bachelor brother coming. Then he achieves a
+series of frantic yells and bounces, until somebody comes to open the
+door and lets him out, when he waddles to the front steps to meet his
+master, wagging his tail to that tremendous extent, that it looks like
+the shuttle of a steam power loom.
+
+The squirrel is slim and sleek, and seems to enjoy life amazingly, he
+hops about so. When one of the Miss Bluejays takes him in her arms, he
+won't stay there, but gets away, and walks all over her head and
+shoulders; and at last runs down her back and disappears.
+
+Then, at No. 11, a very fat gentleman lives with his fat and pretty
+wife, and round dumpling of a baby. As I don't know him either, I call
+him Mr. Fatty, and he seems to be a "good-natured giant." I saw a little
+boy actually stop short to stare at him the other day, when he was
+sitting out at his front door--he is such a regular roly-poly of a
+gentleman--but he only laughed good-temperedly, and never got vexed in
+the least. I don't advise you to try this with all fat gentlemen though;
+they might accidentally sit down on a chair--where you were--afterward,
+and that would be the last of you. This piece of advice, however, is a
+great secret between you and me!
+
+[Illustration]
+
+He is so glad to meet the fat baby when he comes home at night, that I
+can see him in the parlor first kissing it almost black and blue, and
+then tossing it up in the air until I feel as though its head must come
+bump against the ceiling, but it doesn't--and at last, carrying it off
+perched on his shoulder, and looking very much perturbed in its spirits.
+
+But the pleasantest neighbors of all live exactly opposite, at No. 9.
+They take tea every evening in the back parlor; and as the front window
+shades are up, and only the back room lighted, I can always see them at
+their cheerful meal. The rooms are furnished in winter with dark red
+velvet carpets and furniture; with red damask curtains and red velvet
+paper hangings. In summer they put up white curtains, and carpets and
+furniture have cool, cream-colored linen coverings, so that the parlors
+look cozy and charming at all seasons.
+
+As for the family there is a papa and mamma, of course, and a dear
+little girl and boy. The little girl is about ten years old, I should
+think, with great, dark-blue eyes, and curling auburn hair. Her cheeks
+are as rosy as ripe peaches, and her teeth as white as so many pearls.
+Her nose does turn up at the end a little, to be sure; but that is
+rather saucy and becoming than otherwise; and she always looks so sweet
+tempered, and full of fun, too, when I see her of an evening, that I am
+sure she is as good as pie, and as merry as a cricket! Her little
+brother, who is a year or two younger, looks very much like her, and
+their obedient and pretty behavior at table is something really
+beautiful to observe.
+
+It is nearly a year now, since I moved into my lodging at "No. 10," and
+began to wonder what No. 9's name was; and now I must make haste and
+tell you how, only last June, I became acquainted with these dear little
+neighbors of mine.
+
+One pleasant Friday morning, after breakfast, I put on my old-fashioned
+beaver hat, and taking my gold-headed cane in one hand and my market
+basket in the other, I trotted out to buy something nice for dinner;
+for, you see, I am a particular old bachelor, and like to market for
+myself.
+
+Just as I was coming down the steps, the door of No. 9 opened, and the
+little girl ran down _her_ steps. She looked so bright and pretty in her
+cunning round straw hat with the blue ribbons, and white Marseilles
+cloak, carrying her satchel of books and lunch basket in her hand, that
+I could not help nodding to her. So she nodded to me, and then _I_
+nodded again and smiled, and we each walked along on our own side of the
+way. When we came to the corner I thought I would cross over and scrape
+some more acquaintance with my little neighbor. Now on the side of her
+satchel, I saw, when I came near her, was printed in gold letters,
+"Nelly Lawson;" so I said, as cheerily as I could, in my old, quavering
+voice:
+
+"Good morning, Neighbor Nelly!"
+
+The little maiden looked up in my face in a shy fashion at first; but
+when she saw what a mild, gray-headed old bachelor had bade her good
+morning, she took courage, and answered, "Good morning, sir."
+
+"So you are going to school this fine day?"
+
+"Yes; I go to school, but brother Jimmy doesn't; he learns at home. I
+think he is going next year. Have you got a baby at your house? We
+have."
+
+"No," said I, sighing; "I haven't got any baby; I am an old bachelor.
+Will you marry me?"
+
+"Oh, I am too little," she replied quite seriously. "You will have to
+wait until I grow up to you."
+
+I laughed, and asked her, "Don't you want to go to market with me before
+you go to school? There is plenty of time."
+
+"No," replied my little neighbor, firmly; "I can't go anywheres that
+mamma does not know of."
+
+"That's right!" I said. "Don't do anything your mother would disapprove.
+Well, Neighbor Nelly, since you won't go to market with me, I must go to
+school with you; and tell your mother that Neighbor Josiah Oldbird would
+like you to take a walk with him to-morrow; will you?"
+
+"Oh yes! that would be real nice!" said my little neighbor with a
+joyous skip.
+
+By this time we were walking along hand in hand; and soon, seeing my
+little neighbor look in at the window of the candy shop round the corner
+from our street, I thought I would take her in and buy her some candy.
+So in we marched, Nelly's great blue eyes dancing with pleased
+expectation, and stood close by the counter, waiting for our turn to
+come. There were a good many people in the candy shop, and we had to
+wait some time; so, to amuse ourselves, Neighbor Nelly and I turned
+round, and began looking at the funny folks near us.
+
+There was one very fat old country woman, who seemed to be buying
+"quarter or pound," as she said, of every kind of candy in the shop. As
+soon as the papers were handed to her she began eating out of them, and
+before she left, I should think, she had eaten about two pounds of
+candy. Besides the old woman, there were a great many little children,
+who only wanted a penny's worth each; but they hesitated so long whether
+to have "taffie" or "molasses," a lemon-candy horse, or a cinnamon-candy
+trumpet, that they were the most troublesome customers of anybody. Then
+there were several older boys and girls; some, I am sorry to say,
+picking up a loose bit of candy every time the shopman turned away--as
+if that were not stealing; and finally, there was Neighbor Nelly and I,
+who did none of these things, but just looked on, and waited until the
+shopman came to serve us.
+
+I bought some lemon candy, as clear as a bit of yellow glass, and some
+pungent cinnamon, and delectable chocolate; and then I popped the papers
+into Neighbor Nelly's satchel, and we hurried on to school. We had not
+far to go now, and when we came to the house, my little new friend bid
+me good-by, and thanked me so sweetly, that I went away quite a happy
+old bachelor.
+
+In the evening I was looking out of my window as usual, when I saw the
+servant girl come in to light the gas in the back parlor at No. 9, with
+Neighbor Nelly and the little brother Jimmy behind her. While she was
+setting the tea table, the children came running to the window, and both
+nodded and smiled at me. Presently the little boy thrust both hands in
+his pockets, and held them up crammed full of candy. "Thank you, Mr. Old
+Bachelor!" he shouted; "we like you real well!"
+
+That made me real happy; for I am not a crabbed old bachelor by any
+means. In a minute more their father came home; and as they all sat
+around the pleasant tea table, I hope they talked of their lonely old
+neighbor, who watched them from his window.
+
+The next morning, as I was reading the paper, in came the servant and
+gave me the funniest little note! It was addressed on the outside, "To
+my neighbor Oldbird," and ran thus:
+
+          "MY DEAR NEIGHBOR:
+
+          "Mamma says I may take a walk with you this
+          morning, because you are a good old bachelor.
+          Jimmy wants to go, and Gipsey. Gipsey is my dog.
+          He is black and tan, and his tail curls round so,
+          that papa says you might use it for a cork-screw.
+          Jimmy and I mean to try some time. Gipsey likes to
+          be on the seashore, and so does baby. We are going
+          there next week--to Long Branch. I hope you will
+          write me a letter when I am gone, and I am
+                    Your affectionate
+                                        "NEIGHBOR NELLY.
+
+          "Saturday Morning."
+
+You may believe how pleased I was with this dear little note, and I
+thought I would answer it. So I sat down at my writing desk, found a
+cunning little sheet of paper, with a flag on it, and commenced.
+
+Now I happened to think, at that moment, of some very comical letters
+written by the great poet, Tom Hood, to his little friends on the
+seashore; and as they were ever so much funnier than anything I could
+have written, I copied one of them out, and sent it to my little new
+friend.
+
+          "MY DEAR NEIGHBOR NELLY:
+
+          "I am very glad you are to walk with me, and very
+          sorry you are going away so soon. Do you like to
+          be on the seashore? I did, when I was a boy. I
+          and my brother chucked hundreds of stones into the
+          sea, when we were there, but we came away before
+          we could fill it up. Then there is the fun of
+          finding shiny pebbles and jelly fish on the beach.
+          I used to think jelly fish were made of
+          sea-calves' feet, and no flavoring. I suppose the
+          mermaids eat them at their parties.
+
+          "Then there's fishing on the seaside. I used to
+          catch flat fish sometimes, with a long string
+          line, it was like swimming a kite. If you go out
+          in a surf boat, take care it does not "flounder"
+          and get "squamped," as some people say, instead of
+          founder and swamped.
+
+          "Have you ever been bathed in the sea? I was,
+          and, dear me! how I kicked and screamed; or, at
+          least, tried to scream, but the sea, ships and
+          all, began to run into my mouth, and so I shut it
+          up. Remember, when you are bathing, if you meet
+          with a shark, the best way is to bite off his
+          legs, if you can, before he walks away with yours;
+          and pray, pray, pray take care of yourself in the
+          sea, for in some places, they say, it has not even
+          a bottom to go to.
+
+          "Could you bring me a little crab off the beach?
+          If you would catch one for me, and teach it to
+          shake hands without nipping and biting, it would
+          make me quite happy, for I have not had any toys
+          or playthings in a long time. It would be a good
+          plan to hire a little crab to teach the baby to
+          crawl, if he can't walk yet. Bless him! But I must
+          not write on him any more; he is so soft, and I
+          have nothing but steel pens.
+
+          "Now good-by; give my love to everybody, and my
+          compliments to all the rest, and believe me, up
+          hill and down dale,
+
+                    "Your affectionate neighbor,
+                                         "JOSIAH OLDBIRD."
+
+Then I put my letter in a flag envelope, sealed it up tight, and wrote
+on it, "To my dear Neighbor Nelly," and had the maid take it to her.
+
+Presently I could see two little figures flitting about in one of the
+upper chambers, and soon after all four of us, Nelly, Jimmy, I, and
+Gipsey, were in the street. Gipsey was a "toy terrier" that ought to
+have belonged to "Commodore Nutt," the dwarf at "Barnum's," and ran
+along on three legs most of the time, with the fourth, and his
+cork-screw tail elevated in the air for joy at being allowed to join the
+party; while the children were all hop, skip, and jump, and kept tight
+hold of a hand of mine apiece, as though they were afraid of flying away
+if they let go. Meanwhile, I walked quietly along, with my market basket
+on my arm, a sober old bachelor. I expect the people who passed us in
+the street thought me a rather incongruous addition to such a frisky
+party; but then, you know, children _must_ caper about. Bless your
+heart! it would never do in the world to see children mincing solemnly
+along, like little old men and women; it would be as absurd as to have
+my Neighbor Nelly wearing her great-grandmother's coal-scuttle bonnet!
+The last idea struck me as so odd, that I drew a little picture of
+Neighbor Nelly in this guise when I got home, and here it is. How do you
+like it?
+
+[Illustration]
+
+We thought we would go to market first. So we walked slowly down Fourth
+Avenue, and crossed over to the market where the Seventh Regiment armory
+is, opposite the Cooper Institute.
+
+"My cousin is a Seventh Regimenter!" said Jimmy as we climbed up the
+iron steps; "he often let us look on at his company drills last winter,
+and afterward Nelly and I drilled in our yard. The big boy who comes to
+see the old ladies next door, looked over the fence and laughed at us,
+but we didn't care; and we mean to fight for our country like everything
+when we are bigger; that is, I mean to, and Nelly would like to, but
+she's only a girl, you know."
+
+"Only a girl!" repeated Nelly, tossing her long curls; "girls are a
+great deal of use, too; I mended all his stockings and all papa's this
+week--think of that, neighbor Oldbird!"
+
+"That was really splendid!" said I; and just then we entered the market.
+
+The very first thing we met was a horrid big dog, that belonged to some
+butcher; and, bless me! how he began to show his great rows of teeth,
+and growl at Gipsey! Nelly gave a little scream, and tried to hide
+behind me; Jimmy valiantly flew at the big dog with my walking stick;
+and poor little Gipsey nearly stood on the end of his tail with fright,
+and squealed dismally. What a fuss we were all in, to be sure! So at
+last, to quiet the disputants, I caught Gipsey up, and put him in my
+coat pocket, where he sat, looking out at the top, very much comforted.
+
+Then we turned to the right, and went by the brightest and prettiest
+stall in the whole market. It was kept by a Frenchman, who, in his own
+language, would be called a "_charcutier_;" but Jimmy and Nell shouted
+out together "Oh, there's the _pig man_!" as loud as ever they could,
+and then stopped, blushing very much, because they were afraid the pork
+merchant heard them. I expect he did; for he looked very funny when we
+came close, and smoothing down his snowy apron with his fat hands, said
+"Bonjour, mademoiselle!" and laughed good humoredly. There was a great
+"head cheese" on the pig man's marble counter, moulded in the shape of a
+boar's head. The tusks were made of white carrots, the eyes of red
+jelly, and the sides of the dish it was on were beautifully ornamented
+with white roses, cut out of turnips, and parsley foliage. Then there
+were ever so many pork pies, with the most elegant wreaths of flowers on
+the top crust, comical little hams already cooked, and fat dumplings of
+sucking pigs, as pink as baby himself!
+
+When we had looked about us a little, we concluded to buy a pork pie of
+the pig man; and while that was being nicely packed up in paper, out
+popped Gipsey from my pocket, and stood triumphant on the counter, in
+the midst of the little pigs and savory pastries. I don't know what
+forays he would not have made upon them, if he had not been captured by
+the pig man, Jimmy, and me; but he did contrive to jump right into the
+very middle of another pork-pie! and then we had to pay for that, too;
+and wipe the gravy off Gipsey's feet and the ends of his tail and nose,
+and button him up tight in the market basket for half an hour, as a
+punishment for his naughtiness. As to the pie we had bought, Jimmy
+carried that, and Gipsey cut up so many antics inside the basket, that
+he nearly wriggled it out of my hand altogether.
+
+After that we went on, and found, dear me! such a comfortable old market
+woman, who sold us a nice little chicken, and some fresh vegetables, and
+gave the children each a great handful of cherries; but we had to tell
+her to send them home, with our pie, because Gipsey had the basket in
+possession.
+
+Then we walked into the street again, and when we had let Gipsey out of
+prison, concluded to leave the basket at my baker's, and take a walk in
+Broadway. Dear, dear me! what quantities of shop windows there were to
+stare into, and how we flattened our three noses, and spread our six
+hands all over every one of them, while we admired the splendid picture
+books, the stores of sugar plums, or the wonders of toys they contained!
+While we were occupied in this way, a little girl, poorly dressed, and
+lugging a large bundle of work in both arms, came along, and stopping
+beside us at the window of the most splendid toy shop, stood looking
+wistfully in.
+
+Neighbor Nelly straightway twitched my hand, and whispered, "Oh look,
+Neighbor Oldbird! what a poor little girl! I don't suppose she ever saw
+a doll before in her life. How she must wish she had one!"
+
+"Suppose we ask her?" I said.
+
+"Will you ask?" she answered; "I don't like to."
+
+"Nonsense! ask her yourself; she won't eat you, or Gipsey either;" for
+Gipsey was sidling away between my feet, as if he were alarmed too; the
+saucy scamp!
+
+Thereupon Nelly moved closer to the poor girl, and said, in a kind,
+little, timid voice, "Do you like dolls?"
+
+"Yes, very much!" said the child, with a surprised look.
+
+"Oh, so do I!" cried Nelly, rapturously. "I have lots of them at home;
+let me see, there's Jenny, and Willie, and old black Nanny, and--" she
+stopped short, seeing the other look wistfully at her, and then said,
+"Oh, I forgot! you have none, perhaps; would you like to have one?"
+
+"Oh yes, miss!" said the child; "not so much for myself, though, as my
+little sister; she is sick, and can't do anything, poor Clara! but I
+work, and help my mother!" she added, proudly.
+
+"What does your mother do?" asked Jimmy.
+
+"She makes shirts for the army; and I do all the button holes."
+
+"I can't make a button hole," said Nelly, regretfully.
+
+Here I proposed we should walk into the shop, and after we had looked
+all we wanted to at the pretty things, and the children, with screams of
+delight, had ridden in turn on a "spring rocking horse," that sent them
+flying half way to the top of the glass cases behind the counter, I gave
+Jimmy and Nelly each two shillings, and told them to buy whatever the
+little girl would like best. The poor little thing's eyes sparkled with
+happiness when Nelly bought her the composition doll she chose out of a
+heap that were piled in a great basket, gorgeously dressed in pink
+mosquito netting, as I thought, but which Nelly informed me was a
+"tarletane;" and Jimmy laid out his money on a tiny bowl and pitcher of
+sprigged china ware, and an astonished china baby sitting in a bath, and
+looking as if it had turned on the hot water, and couldn't turn it off
+again.
+
+Then we trundled Gipsey about a little in a wicker wagon we found, and
+put him in the patent baby-jumper to take an airing; and at last, when
+we had teased him till he barked like one of the toy poodles on the
+shelves, we took ourselves off, and sent the poor child on her way
+rejoicing.
+
+But it was getting late, and time to trot home, before His Majesty the
+Sun roasted us all like so many eggs. Our street is always shady and
+cool, it seems to me, and we were glad enough to find ourselves once
+more on its pavement. I invited Nelly and Jimmy and Gipsey all to take
+lunch with me, and didn't we have fun! We ate the pork pie, and stuffed
+Gipsey with lumps of sugar, and discovered a pot of raspberry jam in the
+closet, and ornamented ourselves with red rims round our mouths, digging
+it out; and sliced, and buttered, and disposed of almost half a loaf of
+French bread, and hardly stopped laughing, chattering, and barking a
+single minute.
+
+And then, after all this was over, my little neighbors bid me good-by,
+and Gipsey barked at me and poked his cold nose into my hand, which
+meant "Good-by and thank you," all the same, and the three went home as
+merry as crickets.
+
+I could not see much of my little neighbors before they went away the
+next Tuesday, but I was invited to take tea at No. 9 the very last
+evening; and then, what should I find out but that Nelly's mamma was the
+daughter of an old friend of mine whom I had not seen for years! So we
+felt quite like relations right away. Just as tea was over, lo and
+behold! there was a tremendous hullaballoo on the back piazza, and when
+we poked our heads out of the window to see what the matter was, there
+was Gipsey high and dry on the back of Miss Bluejay's fat poodle--having
+squeezed through the railing which separated the two piazzas--with the
+squirrel, which had come to the rescue of his friend, hanging on to his
+tail! and all three setting up a squeal of remonstrance. Gipsey's plight
+was so extremely well deserved, that we wouldn't go to his rescue; but
+at last, with a tremendous twist, he snatched away his cork-screw tail,
+and ran to hide himself and his injured feelings under the sofa in the
+front room. How we laughed at him! and how Nelly tried to make him come
+out and be lump-sugared into good humor, but he wouldn't; so, to make
+up, we coaxed the fat poodle, which had been staring in at the
+performance and sniffing satisfaction, to sit up and beg for us until we
+gave him the lump of sugar. Then Mrs. Lawson sat down to the piano, and
+began playing a funny little hornpipe tune that sounded just like a
+banjo; and, to our astonishment, the fat poodle developed another
+accomplishment; for, getting on his hind legs, he gravely hopped up and
+down on the piazza, keeping time to the music, until we nearly died of
+laughter.
+
+You may fancy, after all these comical doings, that we managed to spend
+a merry evening, and when I at last bid my neighbors good night, it was
+no longer with the feeling that I was a lonely old bachelor.
+
+I did find the street pretty lonely though, after they had gone, next
+day, with two great big trunks strapped on behind the carriage, a
+middling sized trunk hoisted up in front, and several small carpet bags,
+and tiny tawny bundles and baskets in every place where room could be
+found. I fancy Gipsey was in one of the baskets, by the way it bounced
+and wriggled about in Neighbor Nelly's lap; but I don't know; I only saw
+it from my window, whence I waved an adieu to them as they rolled away.
+
+A few days after they had gone, I thought I would amuse myself, in their
+absence, by trying to find out if any of the other neighbors knew
+anything about my neighbor, Nelly. I succeeded in learning what two of
+them knew, and they shall tell it for themselves in the stories that
+follow, and which I have written out. And now, if any other dear little
+children have been pleased with me, in what I have told of my walks and
+talks with Neighbor Nelly, just let them come to No. 10, and meet the
+hearty greeting and loving welcome of the
+
+                                            OLD BACHELOR!
+
+
+
+
+THE BIG BOY'S STORY.
+
+
+YOU want me to tell you what I know about the pretty little girl next
+door? Well, I'm ready to begin, if you won't mind my talk; I'm only a
+boy, you know, and can't use fine words--that's all humbug.
+
+My name is Tom Halstead. I am nephew to the Miss Brandlaws, who live at
+No. 7. The idea of calling my darling old friskies "The Bluejays!" (If
+you don't give me that Australian post stamp I saw in your desk, I'll
+tell 'em, too!) However, to go on with my story.
+
+One morning last winter, just at the end of the Christmas holidays,
+while I was on a visit there, I didn't know what on earth to do with
+myself. So I caught Poddles (that's the poodle), dressed him up in Aunt
+Elsie's nightcap, tied a life preserver round him, and put him in the
+portable shower-bath, just for fun; it didn't hurt him a bit, and--would
+you believe it? the hateful thing hopped out, squealing murder, shook
+himself all over the carpet, scratched off the nightcap, and danced
+round the room with it in a fury, till it was in perfect rags.
+
+Up rushed Aunt Elsie, and was so horrified when she saw the carpet and
+her cap in such a mess, and "darling doggie" all "wetsey-petsey," that
+she locked me up in my room for the rest of the day on bread and water!
+and there was gingerbread, with raisins in it, baking down stairs!!
+Horrid!!!
+
+Of course I couldn't spend my time sucking my thumbs; so, like a
+sensible fellow, I set myself to find some better employment, and soon a
+grand idea came into my head. I had just finished reading a jolly
+old-fashioned novel I found in Uncle Herbert's room, called "The Castle
+Spectre: a Tale of Spain;" where a goose of a lover, such a spooney! had
+scrambled down from the top of a castle, hanging on to his bedclothes.
+_Now_, don't you see it? Perhaps not, so I'll explain.
+
+My bedroom is the third floor, back room, always; and you know that
+piazza at the back of the house? Well, what did I do, but twitch off
+_my_ bedcover--nice white one it was, too--tie it to the bedpost, and
+let the end hang out of the window. Then I scrambled out, and slid down
+the wall like a streak of lightning! You can't think what jolly fun it
+was!
+
+There was lots of amusement in the yard; twelve cats on the fence to
+plague, and no end of snow to make balls and pelt the cook with; beside,
+the gingerbread was just baked, and I got a _brown corner_! So! there!
+while I was eating it, and it was so hot that it almost sizzled, all at
+once I heard a lot of noise in the next yard. Some boys seemed to be
+having a drill there; so I ran up the steps leading from the piazza to
+the ground, and looked over the fence. But lor now! what do you think?
+one of the boys was a girl! She had on long india-rubber boots, and I
+called out, "Go it, Boots!"
+
+Then the little boy that was with her, who seemed to be her brother,
+looked so mad at me! and, really and truly, I couldn't help plaguing
+them a little. I know you think I was real mean; but if you had seen how
+funny they looked, in paper cocked hats, with turkey tails for feathers,
+and the little boy thumping a big tin saucepan for a drum, you would
+have laughed, too; so you needn't look so provoked, Neighbor Oldbird!
+
+"Gee up, awkward squad!" I said; "double quick halt on the right flank!
+Ha-ahup!"
+
+But the little girl only laughed good humoredly, and said: "Jimmy and I
+belong to the Seventh Regiment, and drill in the last fashion. Don't you
+want to come and learn the Lefferts Tactics?"
+
+Wasn't she a nice little thing! Never got mad or anything, but just gave
+me back as good as I sent. I declare, I fell right smack in love with
+her that minute, and I don't care a fig now for the girl I met in
+dancing school, upon my word I don't; so I rushed back into the
+kitchen, coaxed the cook to give me two more hunks of gingerbread, and
+called out, "Won't you have some cake?"
+
+They came running up on the piazza like lamplighters; and while they
+were eating the gingerbread, _I_ was eating something I got especially
+for myself at the same time. Did you ever try it? You have a great big
+sour apple, as cold as it can be, and a tremendous pickled pepper, as
+hot as it can be; then you take first a bite of the pepper, and nearly
+burn all the skin off your throat, and then a bite of the apple to cool
+it again; and so on. It's gorgeous, I tell you!
+
+Presently the little boy (whose name, as I said, was Jimmy), stopped
+his eating to ask me, "Do you live in New York?"
+
+"No, I live at White Plains. I go to the Military Academy there; don't
+you want me to show you some drill?"
+
+"Oh, Cousin Charley is going to teach us some time. He belongs to the
+Seventh Regiment. We love to be soldiers, though, and we know a boy,
+Freddy Jourdain his name is, who got up a whole regiment, and has
+parades, and went into camp, and everything."
+
+"We have a camp at White Plains," I told them. "Do you ever go there in
+summer, Miss----" here I stopped, rather awkwardly, not knowing what her
+name was.
+
+"Oh, I'm not 'Miss' anybody;" she said; "I'm Nelly; but we go to the
+seashore in summer 'most always."
+
+"Can't you dress up in your uniform, and show us how you look at
+school?" said Jimmy.
+
+"Yes, if you like;" here I remembered that the key of my room was in
+Aunt Elsie's pocket, and had to say, "but I can't get into my room now;
+I was locked in, and Aunt Elsie has the key."
+
+"How do you come to be here, then?" said Nelly; "why, dear me, just look
+at the counterpane hanging out of the window; how funny!"
+
+"Why, that's the way I got out!" I said; and so I told them all about
+"The Castle Spectre," and "Lord Alonzo Algernon" Spooneyman, and we got
+into such a perfect _gig_ of laughter, that we nearly rode off in it!
+(Now, don't say that's not a good joke, or I'll not tell another word of
+my story.)
+
+Just then out came Poddles, looking as surprised as ever; and Nelly
+exclaimed, "Oh, there's that funny old dog! what do you call him?"
+
+"His name is Poddles!" said I; "_I_ christened him."
+
+"What a queer name!" said Jimmy; "let's take him into our house and see
+what Gipsey and he will do!"
+
+"Good!" said I. So, without remembering that plaguey white spread, I cut
+over the piazza railings with Poddles under one arm, and we all three
+rushed up stairs together.
+
+They had such a famous play room, with a splendid swing, and a
+teetertorter, and ten-pins, and I don't know what beside; and there was
+the nattiest little dog! but you know him, that "toy-terrier" of theirs.
+Poddles looked a greater fright than ever beside him; so, to pay him
+off, we put that wretched Pod into a basket, tied it fast to the swing,
+and swung him up to the ceiling. It frightened him half to death, and
+serve him right, for being so ugly! after which he and Gipsey went to
+sleep in a big rocking chair, as friendly as possible. Then I gave Nelly
+a splendid swing, "ran under," and cracked my cocoanut three times,
+beside making my arms ache like everything; but I didn't care, she was
+such a dear little thing.
+
+Afterward Jimmy went and got a great plateful of rosy apples; and just
+as we were eating them, and having such fun, up came one of our girls,
+and said that "Miss Brandlaw wanted Master Tom right home!" Wasn't it
+hateful? But, of course, I had to go; so I bundled Poddles under my arm
+again, bid them good-by, and walked off with Mary; but I poked her ribs
+and set Poddles at her all the way, which was some comfort.
+
+I expected a scolding when I came home, and I didn't have one--oh no!
+Aunt Elsie wanted to know where I thought I should die when I went
+to--(no, I believe it was the other way, but never mind)--if I hung
+best bed spreads out of the window, and left my room without permission?
+besides informing me that she should write to ma', and have me sent for.
+Finally, she marched me up stairs again; and when I said I _must_ have
+something to do to keep me out of mischief, she gave me a Sunday school
+book to read, and took herself off.
+
+Of course you will say I was dreadfully wicked not to like the Sunday
+school book, but I couldn't. It was so full of hard names and long
+words, and was all about sanctification and justification and
+regeneration, and how was I to understand a word of it? I love Bible
+stories, but I don't think there is a boy or girl who _understands hard
+doctrines_. Do you, Neighbor Oldbird?
+
+I pretty soon gave up that employment, and amused myself instead with
+pelting the cats on the fence with a few marbles, and trying on my
+uniform, to see how I looked in it; until Aunt Elsie relented, I
+suppose, for she came up and asked me through the keyhole if I was
+sorry, and wouldn't do any more. You can fancy what my answer was, and
+after dinner I got permission to go out and play on the sidewalk.
+
+Neighbor Nelly and Jimmy joined me there pretty soon, and we had such
+fun playing "tag" and driving hoop. It wasn't hoop _time_, to be sure,
+but that was no matter. Then, when we were tired of that, we all sat
+down together on the upper step of No. 9, and began talking about their
+school and mine, and what we learned.
+
+"Do you ever learn pieces of poetry?" asked Nelly. "My teacher, Miss
+Backboard, always gives the girls each a piece of poetry every Friday;
+so we call that poetry day."
+
+"I used to learn pieces too," I said; "but I don't care much for poetry
+unless it's funny."
+
+"Tell us a funny piece," said Jimmy.
+
+"Ah yes, do!" added Nelly; and, of course, when a _lady_ asked me I had
+to, though I felt pretty bashful; so I began.
+
+
+A DAY OF MISHAPS.
+
+(AS TOLD BY BOBBY BREAKWINDOW, A SCHOOLBOY.)
+
+[Illustration]
+
+[Illustration: BOBBY AND ROVER.]
+
+[Illustration]
+
+  Oh dear! was there ever anybody so unlucky as I am,
+  From General ----, who lost that battle t'other day,
+      all the way back to Priam!
+  Come, sit down--do, and let me tell you all about it,
+      and what's the matter;
+  Perhaps it will do me good to have a nice, comfortable,
+      miserable chatter.
+  To begin, then. This morning I woke, and thought I was
+      up with the sun.
+  So never hurried myself; but dressed slow, and came down,
+      to find breakfast all done,
+  And nothing left for me but one cold slapjack, and all
+      the chicken gone,
+  Unless, to be sure, I could have eaten the drumsticks,
+      and one perfectly clean breast bone!
+  And, of course, I had to make haste, for it was nine
+      o'clock and after,
+  And the master had offered a prize to the earliest boy--and
+      here was I beaten by even lazy Tommy Shafter!
+  But it was no use to fret, so I snatched up my satchel, and
+      would have been off in a minute,
+  When lo and behold! my geography was gone; and though we hunted
+      the house, it was plain it wasn't in it,
+  Till at last I remembered that yesterday I had gone after school
+      to the dog pound,
+  And then been fishing with Fred Lee; so, probably, it was at the
+      bottom of the frog pond!
+  Well, off to school I went, and came in after every schoolmate;
+  So, to pay me off, the schoolmaster and all the boys called me
+      Bobby Toolate!
+  But that wasn't all; for the class was just up for spelling,
+  And I didn't know the lesson, and Tommy Shafter prompted me to
+      spell boots _butes_; and that's all I got for telling,
+  Besides going to the foot of the class, and having to get the
+      lesson over;
+  I tell you what! a hand-organ monkey's life, compared to a
+      schoolboy's, is perfect rolling in clover!
+  And I wish I was a monkey, if I did get beaten--yes, that I do--
+  In a red coat all over spangles, and blue trowsers, and a long
+      tail behind to come through!
+  Well, thank goodness, it's over; but that's not the half of my
+      pother;
+  For the very minute I got out of school, Tommy Shafter began
+      to plague and bother,
+  And wanted me to ride on the gate with him that goes in to his
+      grandfather Chowser's;
+  So I did; but there's spikes on the top of that gate; and,
+      confound it, I went to work and tore my trowsers!
+  Just then along came Miss Kitty Snow, and didn't I look dashing,
+  And that hateful Tommy Shafter bawled out "How are you, trowsers?"
+      and jumped down and walked off with her; but just see if I
+      don't give him a thrashing!
+  To pay him off for what he did and more too; for, when I came home
+      weeping and wailing,
+  Pa boxed my ears, and said I was such a bad boy I shouldn't go
+      with him now out sailing;
+  So I had the pleasure of seeing the rockaway drive up to the door,
+  And pa and ma getting in, and sister Tilly, and brother Sam, and
+      ever so many more,
+  All looking so happy and gay, and not caring a bit for poor Bobby,
+  Just as if I _wanted_ to get into scrapes, and mischief and
+      bad conduct were quite my hobby!
+  Then off they whirled; and as I was left alone, I thought I might
+      as well be up and doing.
+  Oh, good gracious, why didn't I sit still? but how could I tell
+      what was brewing?
+  So I went to the stable to see our big dog Rover, and thought
+      I would take him out with me;
+  When, just as I had slipped his chain, he broke loose, and ran,
+      I don't know where! and, I'm sure, pa will never forgive me!
+  For he thought so much of Rover. Oh, dear me, what shall I do?
+  If it would be any use in the world, I really think I should begin
+      to boohoo!
+  The stable boy told me not to take him; but I should like to see
+      myself minding him _rather_;
+  And of course, out of revenge, he'll just go and make the worst
+      of it to father.
+  Well, one would think that was enough; but when I came back to
+      the house, oh jolly!
+  There was our big cat just making a spring at sister Tilda's
+      pretty polly!
+  And in my haste to save the bird I threw the poker at the cat
+      and killed her!
+  And got myself in for a scolding from ma, and no great thanks
+      from Tilda.
+  It's six o'clock now; so, I suppose, they'll soon be home as
+      cross as any Tartar,
+  To give it to me for being such a bad boy, though I'm sure
+      I'm a regular martyr;
+  Don't you think so now, after all that I've just been telling?
+  No breakfast, no geography, late at school, tore my trowsers,
+      kept at home, lost the dog, killed the cat, and didn't know
+      my spelling!
+  I think the best thing I can do is to go to bed, put my head
+      under the clothes,
+  And in a good, comfortable sleep try to forget all my sorrows
+      and my woes;
+  But you may be sure, after this, I shall not neglect to take
+      warning,
+  And begin to-morrow all right, without any sort of fail, by
+      getting up early in the morning!
+
+"There!" said I, when I had finished, and it quite wore my tongue thin
+to repeat such a long piece of poetry. "What do you think of _that_ for
+a story?"
+
+"I think it is real funny," said Nelly, laughing; "I wish I knew
+something to tell."
+
+"I can say a funny piece!" shouted Jimmy.
+
+"Well, say it, then," we two--Nelly and I--put in.
+
+Up he jumped right off, struck a funny attitude, and began:
+
+          "The boy stood on the burning deck,
+           Peeling potatoes by the peck!
+           The flames rolled on and scorched his shins,
+           As he stood peeling potato skins!
+           'Oh pa'!' he cried, 'the flames is hot,
+           Come, put the potatoes in the pot!'
+           But his father, alas! ne'er came to sup,
+           So the flames rolled on and frizzled him up!"
+
+"Did you ever hear anything so ridiculous as that?" cried Nelly. "Poor
+Casabianca! I used to cry over him dreadfully; but I shall never think
+of him now without laughing. Where did you learn that, Jimmy?"
+
+"Oh, Harry Agnew told it to me; he said he repeated it one day in
+school, when the master asked him if he could say a piece of poetry, and
+everybody burst out laughing. The master laughed too; so he couldn't put
+anybody down for a bad mark, though Harry was afraid he would."
+
+"That was almost equal to the trick we played at school," said I. "We
+wanted the doctor to give us a holiday, but he didn't seem to see it; so
+when we were called up for our reading after recess, we were told to
+read Montgomery's poem called 'Questions to Birds and their Answers.'
+One of the verses is about the swallow, and reads thus:
+
+          "'Swallow, why homeward turned thy joyful wing?'
+           'In a far land I heard the voice of spring;
+           I found myself that moment on the way,
+           My wings, my wings, they had not power to stay.'
+
+--but we changed it as though the doctor was asking us a question and we
+were answering--this way:
+
+          "'Boys! why are you forever on the wing,
+           Wanting a holiday for everything?'
+           'From you we are so glad to get away,
+           Our legs, our legs, they will not let us stay.'"
+
+How we all laughed over this; it was real true, too; and pretty soon
+after, as it was getting dark, I bid them good-by and ran home.
+
+Next morning, what should Aunt Elsie and Aunt Ruth (Aunt Priscilla was
+away on a visit) take into their heads, but that they hadn't had any fun
+house-cleaning--(I suppose they must think it's fun, or they wouldn't do
+it so often)--for ever so long; so nothing would suit them but to set
+the whole house in an uproar as quick as possible. Of course, I was in
+the way, whether I stayed in the garret or the kitchen; knocked down
+three pails and a scrubbing brush every time I went down stairs, nearly
+drowned Poddles in hot soapsuds, splashed myself all over with whitewash
+trying to "do" the kitchen ceiling (on my own account, when nobody was
+by), until I looked as if I had been out in a snowstorm, and watering
+the windows outside with the long hosepipe, until every one of them was
+dripping _inside_ like a waterfall.
+
+Now, Neighbor Nelly and Jimmy had been looking out of their parlor
+window, and advising me which were the best parts of our windows to play
+on, when, all of a sudden, Nelly said:
+
+"Why, Tom, it doesn't half clean the panes to do them that way; they
+ought to be washed with soap and hot water. Suppose we try it? Only
+think!" she went on, "how much your aunties would be obliged to us if we
+were to find out a new way to make windows clean, ever so much better
+than the old one!"
+
+"Splendid!" said I and Jimmy together. "Come, let's try it right away!"
+
+With that, Nelly and Jimmy came into our house, and into the front
+basement; Aunt Elsie and Aunt Ruth were both up stairs; so we had the
+two lower stories all to ourselves.
+
+As Nelly was afraid of spoiling her frock, I dived into the cook's
+dresser drawer, where she keeps her own table covers and clean dish
+cloths, and fished out a great big brown roller-towel, which we pinned
+round her neck, making her look in front as if she was tied up in a
+potato sack, with only her head left out. Then Jimmy and I took off our
+nice jackets, rolled up our shirt sleeves, lugged in three big yellow
+dishes full of hot water, spilling plenty on the way, found a long bar
+of brown soap, and helped ourselves to three more of Bridget's clean
+towels; and then we all three began scrubbing away at the windows!
+
+Such fun as we had! We put on the greatest lot of soap, and paid away
+with both hands, so as to make them good and _clean_, laughing and
+talking all the time; and when we thought the water had been used
+enough, or, rather when it was nearly all spilt, we took up our yellow
+bowls and marched into the kitchen for more.
+
+Our boiler, you must know, is a tin affair, like a large soup kettle
+without the handle, and has a faucet in front to draw the water off. We
+put it on the middle of the range, and keep it always full and boiling;
+and now, instead of filling our dishes right away, we began playing the
+kitchen was a steamboat, and the water heater the boiler, just ready to
+burst; so, of course, it was necessary to let off steam, which we did by
+drawing a little water at a time from the faucet into one of our yellow
+dishes, and tilting it back again as soon as the dish was full, beside
+"tooting," as loud as we could, to represent the commotion going on to
+perfection. We were soon so busy over this, that we forgot all about
+the front basement windows for ever so long, until we heard Aunt Elsie
+calling out, "Tom! Tom! where are you?"
+
+"Here I am, Aunt Elsie! come right along! Here we all are, washing the
+windows for you as nice as anything!"
+
+Down marched Aunt Elsie, short order; and the minute she came into the
+basement we heard her give an "O----h!" about a quarter of a mile long.
+We all rushed to ask what was the matter; and such a pickle as the
+windows were in you never did see. The soap was in streaks, and smears,
+and lumps all over the panes, making them look as if somebody had spilt
+a lot of hasty pudding on them, and it had stuck fast. Of course, as we
+left them so long, the soap had hardened on; and poor Nelly, frightened
+half out of her wits, began to cry. That put me up, I can tell you; I
+was determined Aunt Elsie shouldn't scold her; so I begged her not to be
+angry with anybody but me, for it wasn't their fault at all.
+
+"And I must say you are old enough to know better, Tom," said my aunt,
+looking at me reproachfully over the tops of her spectacles; "and as a
+punishment, you must get all the soap off the window before you have any
+dinner. The children had better go home."
+
+But now, what do you think that darling of a Nelly, and Jimmy did? They
+declared I shouldn't do it all alone by myself, but they would stay and
+help me; so, after Aunt Elsie had been coaxed to let us, we filled our
+dishes again, and went to work as busy as bees. It was pretty hard work
+getting the soap off, but we made a joke of it, and by the time the
+windows were fairly polished up, as bright as new pins, we were in a
+perfect frolic. I expect Nelly's bright eyes had something to do with
+it, for Aunt Elsie, after we had finished, and come shouting to her with
+our faces as red as fire, and considerable brown soap on us in spots,
+said, "we were famous workpeople," and gave us New Year's cookies, and
+almonds, and raisins for lunch. I had a Philopoena among my nuts,
+which I ate with Nelly; and pretty soon after they went home.
+
+I did hope she would catch me on the Philopoena, because I had
+something that I meant to give her all along; and this would be a famous
+chance. It was a nest of little boxes, made of plaid papier-maché, about
+a dozen, one inside the other; and when you came to the very last, and
+had opened that, there was a gold thimble and scissors, and a little
+gold bodkin, a needlecase full of tiny needles, and a puncher, just big
+enough for the queen of the fairies; I won it at a raffle on Christmas
+Eve, and kept it to give to some little girl, for, of course, it wasn't
+any use to me; what could I do with a thimble and needles? Sure enough,
+when I looked out of the back parlor window next morning, Neighbor Nelly
+looked out of _her_ window, said with a saucy smile, "Good morning, Mr.
+Tom--Philopoena!" and popped back again.
+
+"Good!" I said. So, after breakfast, I asked Aunt Elsie for a nice sheet
+of paper and a new pen, and then I ran up to my own room, and sat down
+to write a little note to my neighbor. I'm sure, that showed how much I
+liked her, if anything could, for I'd rather do a sum in compound
+fractions, or a French exercise, than write a note. It quite gives me
+the toothache; but at last I wrote something very pretty, as, I'm sure,
+you will say when I repeat it to you. This is what I said:
+
+          "MY DEAR MISS NELLY:
+
+          "I hope you will accept the little present I send
+          you for a Philopoena, because I like you very
+          much. I am real glad you caught me, for perhaps
+          this will remind you of me when I go back to
+          school. I hope the needles will sew all the holes
+          in your clothes, that the thimble will keep you
+          from pricking your pretty little finger, and that
+
+          "If you loves I as I loves you,
+           The scissors won't cut our love in two.
+
+          "Good-by.
+             "From your affectionate friend
+                                         "TOM."
+
+Then I packed up the boxes and the letter in nice white paper, and
+coaxed Mary to take it in right away; and you can't tell how many
+pretty, smiling thanks I had in return.
+
+But you think I am making my story too long, Neighbor Oldbird? Well,
+perhaps I am, but there seems to be so much to tell about Nelly, and the
+nice times we had together, that I don't know when to stop. I am 'most
+through now.
+
+The day I sent her the Philopoena present was the last of my stay in
+town; and after I had packed up my clothes ready to start (with a
+gorgeous plum cake and two jars of raspberry jam in a box, which my dear
+old Friskies gave me,--they always do make everything of me, in spite of
+their lectures), I went to Uncle Herbert's room to bid him good-by, for
+I knew I should not see him again before I started, and he made me the
+best present of all. It was a dear little watch and chain; for he said,
+as I was nearly fifteen, I was quite old enough to take care of one.
+Wasn't that kind of him?
+
+Well, dear me, I don't want to say good-by a bit, and I did not then;
+but, of course, it had to come, and I shook hands with my dear little
+friends, only wishing to goodness that I lived in New York.
+
+We promised about twenty-five times apiece always to be friends; and
+then I kissed Aunt Elsie and Aunt Ruth, pulled Poddles' ears for
+good-by, and pranced off all alone; of course, boys that have watches
+are plenty big enough to go from New York to White Plains by
+themselves. I suppose we always shall stay there, for papa is abominably
+fond of the country; but just wait until I am a man, and see if I don't
+come to live in New York, and marry Neighbor Nelly, if she will have me.
+Mind you keep that last remark a secret, now, Neighbor Oldbird! That's
+all there is about it.
+
+
+
+
+THE FAT GENTLEMAN'S STORY.
+
+
+          I'M in love with Neighbor Nelly,
+            Though I know she's only ten;
+          While I am five and forty,
+            And the _married-est_ of men.
+          I've a wife as fat as butter,
+            And a baby--such a boy!
+          With the plumpest cheeks and shoulders,
+            Who's his father's dearest joy.
+
+          Though a Square toes and a Buffer,
+            Still I've sunshine in my heart;
+          Still I'm fond of tops and marbles
+            Can appreciate a tart.
+          I can love my Neighbor Nelly,
+            Just as though I were a boy,
+          And would hand her cakes and apples,
+            From my depths of corduroy.
+
+          She is tall, and growing taller;
+            She is vigorous of limb;
+          (You should see her playing soldiers
+            With her little brother Jim!)
+          She has eyes as blue as damsons;
+            She has pounds of auburn curls;
+          She regrets the game of leapfrog
+            Is prohibited to girls.
+
+          I adore my Neighbor Nelly,
+            I invite her in to tea,
+          And I let her nurse the baby
+            Her delightful ways to see.
+          Such a darling bud of woman!
+            Yet remote from any teens;
+          I have learnt from Neighbor Nelly
+            What the girls' doll instinct means.
+
+          Oh! to see her with the baby!
+            (He adores her more than I);
+          How she choruses his crowing,
+            How she hushes every cry!
+          How she loves to pit his dimples
+            With her light forefinger deep;
+          How she boasts, as one in triumph,
+            When she gets him off to sleep!
+
+          We must part, my Neighbor Nelly,
+            For the summers quickly flee;
+          And the middle-aged admirer
+            Must, too soon, supplanted be.
+          Yet, as jealous as a mother,
+            A suspicious, cankered churl,
+          I look vainly for the setting,
+            To be worthy such a pearl!
+
+          NOTE.--This charming little gem is not original,
+          being gleaned from the pages of Putnam's Magazine.
+          As it was there published anonymously, the author
+          is unable to make any further acknowledgment.
+
+
+
+
+POSTSCRIPT TO THE THREE STORIES.
+
+BY THE OLD BACHELOR.
+
+
+WHEN I had finished copying out the stories of the Big Boy and the Fat
+Gentleman last summer, the thought struck me that, as I had been in town
+all the warm bright June weather, it would do my health a great deal of
+good to take a trip to Long Branch. Of course, it was not to see
+Neighbor Nelly--certainly not.
+
+So, the very next Saturday afternoon I dusted up my valise, and put some
+nice cool summer clothes in it, and a great paper of candy, which I
+meant for my little neighbors, in case I should see them by accident!
+Somebody had told me that the Mansion House was the best hotel to stop
+at. Shall I tell you why? Because there was a party there, of a papa and
+mamma, a dear little girl and boy, and a remarkably nice little toy
+terrier, which would put me in mind very much of some friends of mine
+called Lawson. In fact, this family was called Lawson, too, and the
+younger members were christened Nelly and Jimmy! Comical, wasn't it?
+
+If you have never been to Long Branch, you can't think what a pleasant
+sail it is down the Bay in the "Thomas Collyer," and how much I enjoyed
+my trip. The pleasant shores of Long and Staten Islands (_I_ used to
+live on Staten Island, and had some comical times there, which I mean to
+write out one of these days) looked as verdant and beautiful as ever;
+the sea was as blue as a bluebottle fly, and the sun as light as a cork!
+As I looked at the great, rolling waves, I laughed to myself, thinking
+what nice times we were going to have in bathing; ducking under them,
+when they came roaring along the shore after us, as if they meant to
+gobble us up, and bouncing out again when they had passed, all dripping
+and laughing, and ready for the next one to play the same trick on us.
+Sometimes, to be sure, the waves play too rough, and knock you off your
+feet without "by your leave;" or a little crab will walk up and bite
+your toes, just by way of welcoming you to Long Branch; but nobody minds
+it. Bless you!--that only makes it more fun to go in bathing!
+
+Well, the boat stopped at the pier, which extends a quarter of a mile
+from the shore, putting one in mind of a long crab's claw stuck out for
+"shake hands" by old Neptune; and I jumped into the cars and was bounced
+and rattled along to Long Branch. As it was Saturday afternoon, a great
+crowd of people were going there with me, and, deary me! when _I_ came
+to the Mansion House, there wasn't any room left for me! Wasn't it too
+bad? Just when I had fixed to have such a nice time with my dear little
+friends! It would never do to go away, however, so I said: "Well, never
+mind, Mr. Mansion House--that is, Mr. Neighbor Nelly--dear me!--Mr.
+Laird, I can do without a room; and at night you can put me to sleep in
+the pigeon house, or the hen coop, or under the counter of the office,
+or up the chimney, I don't care which; but go away I can't!"
+
+Now, I expect, Mr. Laird must have known I had come to see Neighbor
+Nelly, and what a disappointment it would be not to get in; for after a
+consultation with his bookkeeper, he told me he could give me a room
+after all! and I was so glad, that I offered him my snuff box
+immediately, which is a favor I only grant to very nice people!
+
+So up stairs I hurried, to get ready for tea, in high good humor, and,
+would you believe it, when I came down again, whose table should I be
+put to sit at, but Neighbor Nelly's? Oh, how surprised and pleased she
+was to see me! and Jimmy and his father and mother were just as glad.
+There was famous "clam chowder" for tea, and such great big
+blackberries, that we really had to make two bites of them! not to
+mention the quantities of other good things; and after tea we strolled
+out on the bluff, which overlooks the ocean. There are three pretty
+little summer houses before the Mansion House, and in one of these we
+took our seats. Gipsey had come scampering up to me in delighted
+recognition as we left the dining room, barking and wagging his tail,
+until I should think both his tail and his bark would have been quite
+out of joint.
+
+"Oh, Neighbor Oldbird, I'm so glad you have come," began Nelly, eagerly;
+"we have been having such fun, and, now you are here, it will be nicer
+than ever."
+
+"Do you and Jimmy go in bathing?" I asked.
+
+"I guess we do!" cried Jimmy. "We rush into the water first of anybody,
+and go out real deep, when we have hold of the ropes. Some great big
+boys are as afraid as anything! But we like to have the waves go over
+our heads."
+
+"Talking about big boys," said I, looking wonderfully sly, "I made the
+acquaintance of a big boy in our street, not long ago, who knows a
+certain little lady very well; and likes her very well, too!"
+
+"Oh, I know!" chimed both the children; "it's Tom Halstead. Isn't it?"
+
+"Yes; he told me something funny about you, too; I did not know you
+could wash windows before, Neighbor Nelly."
+
+My little neighbor laughed and blushed comically when I said that, and
+then Jimmy said:
+
+"He's a first rate fellow, I tell you. He sent us a letter the other
+day, and what do you think? he's coming here!"
+
+"Coming here!" I exclaimed; "my stars! I shall be quite thrown in the
+shade when such a nice friend makes his appearance. I think I shall have
+to go home again Monday, and I did mean to stay till Wednesday," and I
+made up a dismal face, and pretended to be quite heart-broken.
+
+"No, indeed, Neighbor Oldbird! we shall always like you the best!" cried
+Nelly, catching both my hands in hers. "He is a very nice boy, to be
+sure, but we like _you_ just as much as if you were our bachelor uncle."
+
+"Then I move to be called Uncle Josiah directly!" I said, laughing;
+"so, my dear niece and nephew, don't you think it would be a good plan
+for us to go down on that nice yellow sand there, and look at the
+waves?"
+
+The children were delighted with this plan, so we all three walked to
+the steep wooden steps that lead from the bluff to the beach below, and
+were soon on the sands. Gipsey came racing after as usual, and in his
+haste to join us, ran so fast down the steps, that he couldn't stop
+himself, but had to bring up on the sand past the water mark, looking
+comically astonished. To put a finishing touch to his misfortunes, a
+great big wave came tumbling in just then, and over poor Gipsey it went!
+sousing him head and ears! It frightened him so much that he rushed
+dripping wet to Neighbor Nelly, and jumped into her lap, squealing
+dismally. Such a perfect shower-bath of cold salt water as rained all
+over her pretty muslin dress, and trim little gaiters and stockings! We
+had to shake her well, and put Gipsey to bed on a sandhill near us,
+where he went to sleep, and, I hope, forgot his miseries.
+
+Perhaps you don't know it, but the sand is a famous place to write your
+name. You go as near the retreating wave as you dare, and then, with a
+walking stick or an umbrella, or your finger, if nothing better is to be
+had, write your name, or draw a hideous spook on the wet sand. You have
+to be quick about it, too; for just as you are putting the finishing
+touches to the work, another great billow is sure to come tearing at
+you, with a wide, deep hollow of emerald green, and foaming crest,
+looking like molten silver in the moonlight. Crash! it falls on the
+beach; and a long rush of foam slides up the sand as you scamper out of
+reach, not always without a wet shoe or two. Now the water has all run
+back, but where is the writing? The sand is smooth once more, and ready,
+like a great blackboard, to be marked on anew. So the sea is always
+clearing your writing book for you, and giving you a chance to begin
+again and see how long it will last!
+
+I should think we wrote "Nelly," "Jimmy," and "Neighbor Oldbird," about
+fifty times each on the sand, with my walking stick; and then we "hung
+Jeff. Davis on a sour apple tree," and depicted him with Old Spookey
+coming after him, and told the Atlantic Ocean, "We like blue fish," and
+"We're going in bathing Monday," and never succeeded in keeping one of
+our achievements more than half a minute.
+
+We stayed down on the delightful beach until nearly half-past nine; and,
+dear me, what a heap of sand we got in our shoes! It was quite wonderful
+how it contrived to work its way in; but there it was, making us lift up
+our feet as heavily as though we had cannon balls tied to our ankles.
+
+But it was getting late, and high time for small people to be off to
+bed; so, with a shake of the hand from one of my little neighbors, and a
+"good kiss" from the other, I don't say _which_, Gipsey was waked up,
+and they all trotted off together.
+
+Next morning was Sunday, and a beautiful sunshiny day. The first thing I
+did when I woke up, was to pop my head out of the window and take a look
+at the ocean. There it was, as beautiful as ever, and now I found out a
+funny thing about Long Branch that I hadn't noticed the evening before.
+"Why," said I, "is it possible I am in the country? Where are the
+trees?" They were nowhere to be seen, not so much as a bush; while the
+flowers were represented by everybody's bathing dresses hanging over
+all the fences, and on ever so many clothes-lines besides, to dry. The
+fact is, that the Atlantic Ocean is determined to let nothing be admired
+but itself; so it will not permit a tree to grow any nearer its shores
+than half a mile. So all the foliage there consists of the direful old
+bathing dresses, flapping in the wind and looking like so many
+scarecrows put up to frighten off the fishhawks.
+
+In the morning we went to the cunning little Episcopal church, and
+listened to the earnest teachings of the noble young rector, who is
+working so bravely in his Master's cause with such poor earthly reward.
+That he is laying up treasure where "neither moth nor rust doth
+corrupt," we cannot but believe. We did not like to leave the quiet
+little church for the great noisy hotels, in one of which, as we passed
+it, they were _playing billiards_. Oh! what an occupation for God's holy
+day! I cannot believe they were Christians who were playing, but I know
+I wanted to go and beg them to stop.
+
+In the afternoon it clouded up, and began to rain very hard; so we could
+not go to church, and as it was very little like Sunday in the crowded
+hall and parlor, Mrs. Lawson proposed we should all come and sit in her
+room, which opened on one of the upper piazzas. So we established
+ourselves here, where it was quiet and cool, very glad to escape from
+the bustle down stairs.
+
+"Suppose you were to repeat that pretty German hymn I gave you the other
+day," said her mother to Nelly. "Perhaps Mr. Oldbird would like to hear
+it."
+
+"Yes, that I should," I said; so Nelly began the beautiful verses
+called--
+
+
+"ALL THERE."
+
+          "Nothing is lost; the treasures which the ocean
+             Hath taken to itself in ages fled,
+           The lives that rest beneath its ceaseless motion
+             Until 'the sea shall render up its dead:'
+
+          "The dew drops that the warm bright sunshine drieth,
+             The cloud that melts away in summer air,
+           The bud that lifteth its sweet head--and dieth,
+             They are not lost--God keeps them in his care.
+
+          "Nothing is lost; the anguish of the mourner,
+            And bitter tears that fall like solemn rain,
+          Are safely stored within the heavenly garner,
+            Till Christ shall come unto his own again.
+
+          "And our beloved ones that Death doth gather
+             To their calm, dreamless sleep beneath the tomb,
+           Like tender flowers, are cherished by the Father
+             In the celestial fields of Heaven to bloom.
+
+          "Nothing is lost; oh, let the promise cheer us;
+             By God himself to weary mortals given;
+           Our darling ones shall soon again be near us,
+             Our hopes shall bloom, unfadingly, in Heaven."
+
+"I think that is the best hymn I know," added Nelly, when she had
+finished. "Now, what shall we do?"
+
+"Let's play church!" suggested Jimmy.
+
+"Oh yes! that's the very thing!" said Nelly. "Suppose we ask Kitty and
+Robby Morris to come in."
+
+So Kitty and Robby were found, and consented to join the play, which
+straightway began; mamma and I looking on, though we made believe not to
+be taking notice, for fear of disturbing the little visitors.
+
+Robby, who was a dear little fellow, only five years old, with long
+golden curls and great blue eyes, was the minister, at his own special
+request. The children dressed him in a long white sack of Mrs. Lawson's
+by way of a gown, and gave him a small table for a pulpit. The others,
+with Gipsey, and a large gray cat, the property of Robby and Kitty,
+which marched in after them, were the congregation, sitting on the edge
+of the bed, to be like the long church pew. The minister took for his
+text, "Little children, love one another," and his sermon was such a
+dear, funny little discourse, that I must write it down for you.
+
+"Now, my dear peoples," he said, "I hope, whenever you feel like
+karrelling,[A] or being as cross as bears, you will 'member what the
+Bible says 'bout loving one another. Gipsey fighted my tat to-day, and
+pulled some of her fur out; but he's only a dog, and I readed in my Dr.
+Watts--
+
+          "Let dogs delight to bark and bite,
+             For God has made 'em so;
+           Let bears and lions growl and fight,
+             For 'tis their nature too.
+           But, children, _you_ s'ould _never_ let
+             Your angry _pass'ons_ rise!
+           Your little hands were _never_ made
+             To sc'atch each other's eyes."
+
+----so I was not mad at him, 'cause he didn't _know_ he ought to love
+pussy.
+
+"I _s'apped_ nurse the other day, 'cause she made me come out of the
+water before I wanted to, and _that_ was _very_ naughty; I begged her
+pardon, though, and gave her a piece of my _tandy_, that papa had
+brought me. Now, my dear peoples, I think that is long enough. S'pose we
+sing, 'I want to be an angel.'"
+
+[Illustration: PLAYING CHURCH.]
+
+Wasn't that a cunning little sermon? It put me in mind of how I used to
+play church in my childhood, long ago; when my young brother, dear
+little Davy, would stand on a chair, while I sat on my stool at his
+feet, and preach a sermon something like Robby's. Darling Davy! I
+fancied I could see his sweet face and earnest eyes looking down at me,
+from his happy home in heaven that Sunday afternoon; for he closed those
+dark eyes on this weary earth many long years since, and I never think
+of him now but as standing on the chair in our father's study (with,
+perhaps, mother looking in, unknown to him), and preaching from some
+simple text that we knew and loved, in quaint, yet childish words. Ah,
+well! perhaps it was better so, than that he should have lived to be a
+gray-headed old bachelor like "brother Jose!"
+
+So the children all sang the hymn, and that was the end of church. We
+passed the rest of the afternoon telling Bible stories, and repeating
+hymns, and after tea it was clear once more, and dry enough to go out on
+the bluff.
+
+You may be sure, we were all in famous spirits Monday morning, and ready
+for any sort of a frolic. Who could help being good humored with such
+company as my little neighbors? Mr. Lawson left us in the first train
+for the city; but, to make up, who should have come down in the early
+morning boat, but Tom Halstead and Miss Elsie Bluejay--or Brandlaw, I
+ought to say, since I know her name now; and they drove straight up to
+the Mansion House, of course--who wouldn't, when Neighbor Nelly was
+there? The children received Tom with shouts of joy; and he looked so
+handsome and happy, and his great black eyes sparkled so with good humor
+and fun, that I felt quite ready to admit him into my circle of little
+people that I knew and loved. Neighbor Nelly and he were an admirable
+contrast in point of appearance, and I shouldn't be surprised if the
+last remark made to me in strict confidence, by my friend Tom in his
+account of her, should come true some day.
+
+I wish I could sketch a little picture of our party as we clustered
+together on the piazza, to show what manner of people we were then; and
+another, of our appearance in the water afterward. Ten o'clock was the
+hour for bathing that morning; so we each armed ourselves with our
+bathing clothes and a prodigious towel, like the main sail of a fishing
+smack, and rushed down to the beach; that is, the younger members; Aunt
+Elsie, Mrs. Lawson, and I walked soberly along. Then we popped into
+separate bathing houses, still looking like respectable and responsible
+members of society, and popped out five minutes afterward--scarecrows!
+spooks! animated rag-bags! with the last vestige of our gentility and
+good looks departed.
+
+Aunt Elsie had taken leave of a most beautiful brown "front" and
+fourteen luxuriant curls, the absence of which gave her an appearance
+very like a staid bald-headed owl; particularly as she would keep on her
+very round spectacles, and wore a pair of extremely long-fingered green
+cotton gloves. The long ends of the glove fingers, waving about in the
+water, were not unlike the owl's claws; while her gray woollen bathing
+dress might have passed for a new sort of flannel feathers. A mortified
+blue sunbonnet, with all the canes out, was perched lop-sided on her
+head, and she wore a pair of bathing shoes, like brown poultices. The
+rest of us were just as bad, though; I was an ogre in green flannel, Tom
+and Jimmy monkeys in red, Mrs. Lawson tolerably lady-like in blue, with
+white tape trimmings, and Neighbor Nelly a ridiculous little old jumping
+Jenny in white, with gorgeous red facings; and all in hats that defied
+our best friends to know us in.
+
+How we laughed at each other, and then made haste over the sand, which
+was so hot that it nearly scorched our feet, and plumped into the nice
+cool ocean, where ever so many other frights were already hopping about.
+
+Now for a rush into the deep water! here comes a big wave! down, down
+now! and over our heads it went! dousing us as it had Gipsey the
+Saturday night, only we didn't squeal.
+
+Presently, some people who had come from the next hotel, began dancing
+the "Lancers" in the water, ducking under instead of bowing, and
+seeming to have such a good time, that nothing would suit the children
+but that they must begin dancing, too; in consequence of which a wave
+twice as high as usual came roaring up, and carried Neighbor Nelly right
+off her feet. Under the water she went, and for an instant we were quite
+frightened; but presently up she popped laughing, and trying to squeeze
+the salt water out of her eyes.
+
+However, that put a stop to the dancing; and here let me tell you, that
+surf bathing is always a pretty venturesome thing to attempt, unless you
+grasp the ropes firmly, or have hold of some older and stronger person's
+hand.
+
+There was one gentleman flourishing about near us, who seemed bent upon
+trying how many odd things he could do in the water. Presently we saw
+him going down head first, and then his feet coming up in the air like a
+duck's! It looked so comical to see any one besides a duck standing
+upside down in the water, that we all burst out laughing, and just then
+along came another billow, and treated us each to a mouthful of salt
+water!
+
+By this time we had been in long enough for one day, for you should
+always remember to come out before you feel chilled, and so we waded to
+the shore, looking more outlandish than ever, now the bathing dresses
+were all soaked, and hurried into the houses to get dry and dressed.
+
+Surf bathing is a famous thing to give you an appetite; and I don't
+wonder Mr. Laird provides so bountiful and well cooked a dinner, when I
+think of the famishing five hundred people that were to be fed the day I
+was there, and every day beside. The "Charge of the Light Brigade" was
+nothing to the charge we made upon the dishes; and as the dining room is
+sensibly arranged with tables accommodating about a dozen people each,
+we all sat together; and had such a merry time that two or three cross
+old dames looked sharply at our party, very curious to know what all the
+laughing was about. Our small friend Gipsey was the cause of it, partly,
+for he posted himself beside each of our chairs in turn, and made such
+surprising and despairing hops and skips after bits of chicken held up
+beyond his reach, that he very nearly turned a somerset each time.
+
+We rewarded his patience at last by giving him some bones, which he
+crunched under the table with perfect satisfaction, while we were
+discussing the ice cream and other good things.
+
+In the afternoon I was sitting reading the paper on the upper piazza,
+and the children were amusing themselves in their own fashion near me.
+Nelly, with another little girl, whose name seemed to be "Baby," for
+they never called her anything else, were manufacturing a resplendent
+doll's dress for a waxen angel in a white spencer--or whatever those
+muslin concerns are called, which the ladies wear with colored skirts
+nowadays, and a black velvet pointed belt; while the boys, with their
+arms fraternally entwined, were interchanging confidences on the
+important subjects of "My peg top," "Don't you think thirty-eight cents
+is a tremendous price for kites?" "How many glass agates have you got?"
+and so on--when Tom, looking very mischievous, suddenly lifted up dolly
+by the toe of her shoe, and asked, "Why, Nelly, what's the matter with
+this doll; has she got the spinal complaint?"
+
+"No, you goose," said Nelly, laughing. "What makes you ask that?"
+
+"Because she has on a supporter," said Tom, with perfect gravity,
+pointing to the velvet belt. "Poor thing! why don't you take her in
+bathing? It would do her health good, I'm sure; she looks fearfully
+pale."
+
+"Ah, make him put her down, Nelly," said Baby; "he'll break her if he
+goes on so;" for Tom was now amusing himself by balancing dolly on her
+head in his hand, making a great display of embroidered trowsers and
+hoop petticoats; and now, catching her by both hands, he suddenly swung
+her over the railing. "This is the way she ought to be ducked under the
+waves!" he added. Nelly sprang forward at the same moment with an "Oh,
+Tom! please!" and caught his arm rather suddenly. His hold relaxed at
+the same moment, and crash! down tumbled poor dolly on the ground below,
+breaking one of her wax arms completely off, and making a fearful cavity
+in her forehead, which killed her completely! that is, I should think
+so. I never heard of any one who survived fracture of the skull. Did
+you?
+
+Poor Nelly! She tried hard not to mind it; but dolly's head was one too
+many for her, and the tears came rolling quickly down her cheeks as she
+gazed at the unfortunate waxen damsel below, with quivering lip. Tom
+turned red and white alternately in silence for a moment, and then began
+pouring forth apologies and regrets. He called himself all the imps
+that ever were heard of for being so careless; he offered to go to New
+York that very day to buy another doll, and have his hair well pulled
+beside, if she only would forgive him, and say she didn't think he had
+done it on purpose; and, in short, we had quite a little scene; when,
+fortunately, there occurred to me a pleasant means of diverting the
+minds of the party from the accident that had happened. So I laid down
+my paper, as though I had not been listening, and said:
+
+"Well, little people, I believe I have discovered all the news there is;
+so what do you say to coming to a party I am thinking of giving in my
+room?"
+
+"A party!" cried the children, dropping the subject of the doll to look
+at me; "why, we should like that very much. What sort of a party is it?"
+
+"A reading party," I answered. "I have some papers I have been thinking
+of reading to you, to get your opinion of them before I put them in a
+book; and I shouldn't be surprised if there was a paper of candy in my
+drawer besides."
+
+"Why, do you write books?" asked Baby, opening her bright eyes very wide
+indeed, as if to be certain what a real live author looked like.
+
+"To be sure I do," I said, laughing. "Funny stories, and sad ones, too;
+and some that are every word of them true, and others that are told me
+by my friends; and you shall tell me whether they are true or not."
+
+So we all made haste into my room--not the same I had when I first came,
+but one on the front piazza, near Neighbor Nelly's. The papers I meant
+were my own, Tom's, and the Fat Gentleman's stories, which I had brought
+down with me, to look over and correct. The candy I had bought for Nelly
+and Jimmy, as I told you, and forgotten all about to that moment. Little
+Robby came trotting along just then, so we asked him to be of the party;
+and Mrs. Lawson, looking out to see why we were in such a bustle, made
+up the company.
+
+I wish you could have been at Our Party that afternoon. We made a cosey
+little group, I assure you. Mrs. Lawson sat by the table with her
+sewing; Tom established himself close to my chair, and Nelly nestled by
+my other side. Baby and Jimmy sat on hassocks, contrived from carpet
+bags, at my feet; dear little Robby was lifted to my knee, and the
+reading began. Oh, the laughter, and comical wonder, and blushes, when
+my little neighbors found the stories were about them! Nelly burst out
+with "Oh, Neighbor Oldbird!" and hid her face on my shoulder every time
+there was some special praise of herself. Tom turned perfectly crimson
+when we came to his story, and was in and out of his seat twenty times,
+begging me to stop, during its progress, his splendid black eyes
+glancing appealingly at me and Nelly by turns. I wouldn't spare him a
+single word, however; and when I came to his declaration at the end,
+concerning Nelly, there was a general shout of laughter.
+
+"There's an eligible offer for you, Miss Nell," I said solemnly. "You'd
+better take it into consideration!" and so on, until Mrs. Lawson begged
+me to stop. She did not like to have ideas about marriage put into the
+children's heads; and I, when I reflected, was very sorry I had been so
+thoughtless. Tom bore my teasing manfully; but Nelly's face was rather
+grave, as if she did not like such remarks to be made about her; so I
+hurried on to the Fat Gentleman's story, and brought up at the end, and
+then handed round the candy, amid general approbation.
+
+How we all passed that evening together on the beach, and had a wildly
+happy time; how we went in bathing the next day, and the next; and how,
+on Wednesday afternoon, I bid a most reluctant good-by to my little
+neighbors, I have not room to tell. I want to write how gladly we met
+again in the city in the fall; how Tom did come to live in New York, and
+favored us with his company as often as possible; how we chanced again
+on the little girl whom we had met in the toy shop, and found her living
+in a wretched tenement house in Cherry street, whence Mr. Lawson and I,
+with some other friends, removed them in haste, and established them in
+a nice little thread-needle store on one of the business avenues not far
+from our street; but all this would take too long.
+
+I must say, though, what a blessed change it has been for them,
+particularly for poor little crippled Clara, who never fails to greet us
+with a smile when we go there to see her, as she sits in her comfortable
+arm-chair by the window, with her pet spaniel "Dandy" beside her. She is
+always contented and cheerful, in spite of the sharp pain that often
+racks her slender limbs; and as I look on her pale face, which is so
+plainly not long for this earth, and think that now her suffering life
+will end amid comfort and peace, I whisper to myself with a heart full
+of love, "All this through thy sweet influence, dear
+
+                        "NEIGHBOR NELLY!"
+
+FOOTNOTE:
+
+[A] Quarrelling.
+
+
+
+
+CONCLUSION.
+
+
+AND that was the end of the famous Sock Stories, which had afforded
+George and Helen so much amusement during nearly three months; for it
+took all that time for Aunt Fanny's daughter to write, and the children
+to read them all. They could not tell which they liked the best; for it
+so happened that the "Funny Little Socks" made their appearance just at
+the time when some dear little cousins of theirs, only four or five
+years old, had come to spend a week or two with them, which made baby
+stories doubly welcome; and I don't know what the good and delightful
+gentleman to whom the fifth book is dedicated will say about it, when he
+sees his name at the front; but it was thought very appropriate by
+Helen's papa; as the very best story in the book is all about
+philosophers, grave and gay.
+
+One thing in particular I am most happy to record; and that is, that the
+good habits which keeping mamma's little code of rules had engendered,
+were not broken off at the close of the readings; but instead, were
+formed more lastingly with every week; until now every one who knows
+George and Helen says, the first thing, "What good children they are!
+and yet, they never have to be whipped, or shut up in a dark closet to
+make them so." No! they are good from a higher motive than the dread of
+punishment; for they are inspired with the sincere desire to make their
+dear mother as happy as they can; and it would not surprise me at all if
+Santa Claus, who is a very discerning old gentleman, were to put
+something very nice indeed in both socks and stockings this
+Christmas--in spite of the hard times!
+
+And now, one last word, before Aunt Fanny's daughter bids you good-by,
+little reader. She hopes and prays, in all sincerity, that she has
+succeeded not only in amusing you, but in giving you some lessons which
+will sink into your hearts for your real good. And if in the shadowy
+train of personages who have moved before you in these Sock Stories,
+there is one who has pleased you especially, from Colonel Freddy and
+little tender-hearted Greta, to Little Mother and the Old Bachelor,
+Neighbor Nelly, with her bright eyes and merry ways, or Gipsey, of the
+cork-screw tail and yap! yap! bark, the knowledge of this fact will give
+_her_ what she wishes for you all, a very
+
+                           MERRY CHRISTMAS!
+
+
+          THE END OF THE SIXTH AND LAST BOOK.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Transcriber's Notes:
+
+Page 026, "anx" changed to "any" (him any more)
+
+Page 32, "eat" changed to "ate" (We ate the)
+
+Page 086, "found" changed to "fond" (fond of tops and marbles)
+
+Page 126, "copmany" changed to "company" (made up the company)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Neighbor Nelly Socks, by Sarah L. Barrow
+
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+
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+<body>
+
+
+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Neighbor Nelly Socks, by Sarah L. Barrow
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Neighbor Nelly Socks
+       Being the Sixth and Last Book of the Series
+
+Author: Sarah L. Barrow
+
+Release Date: August 3, 2009 [EBook #29597]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NEIGHBOR NELLY SOCKS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Edwards, Emmy and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;">
+<img src="images/i001.jpg" width="500" height="428" alt="OUR PARTY." title="" />
+<span class="caption">OUR PARTY.</span>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<h3>THE SOCK STORIES,</h3>
+
+<h4>BY "AUNT FANNY'S" DAUGHTER.</h4>
+
+<h1>NEIGHBOR NELLY SOCKS:</h1>
+
+
+<div class='center'><b>BEING</b></div>
+
+<h3>THE SIXTH AND LAST BOOK OF THE SERIES.</h3>
+
+<div class='center'><b>BY</b></div>
+
+<h2>"AUNT FANNY'S" DAUGHTER,</h2>
+
+<div class='center'>THE AUTHOR OF "THE LITTLE WHITE ANGEL."<br />
+<br />
+<br />
+<br />
+<br />
+
+NEW YORK:<br />
+LEAVITT &amp; ALLEN, 21 &amp; 23 MERCER ST.<br />
+1863.<br />
+</div>
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<div class='copyright'>
+<span class="smcap">Entered</span>, according to Act of Congress, in the year 1862, by<br />
+S. L. BARROW,<br />
+In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States for the<br />
+Southern District of New York.<br />
+<br />
+<br />
+JOHN T. TROW,<br />
+<span class="smcap">Printer, Stereotyper and Electrotyper</span>,<br />
+60 Greene Street, New York.<br />
+</div>
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<div class='center'>
+<small>TO</small><br />
+<br />
+MY DEAR FATHER,<br />
+<br />
+<small>TO WHOSE KINDLY AND CHARMING WAYS WITH THE</small><br />
+<br />
+<big>"LITTLE FOLK"</big><br />
+<br />
+<small>I OWE THE CHARACTER OF "NEIGHBOR OLDBIRD,"</small><br />
+<br />
+<small>THIS BOOK</small><br />
+<br />
+<small>IS LOVINGLY DEDICATED.</small><br />
+</div>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<h2>CONTEXTS OF VOL. VI.</h2>
+
+
+
+<div class='center'>
+<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" summary="Contents">
+<tr><td align='left'>&nbsp;</td><td align='right'><small>PAGE</small></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>NEIGHBOR NELLY. <span class="smcap">In Three Stories</span>.</td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'><span style="margin-left: 2em;">1. THE OLD BACHELOR'S STORY,</span></td><td align='right'><a href="#Page_7">7</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'><span style="margin-left: 2em;">2. THE BIG BOY'S STORY,</span></td><td align='right'><a href="#Page_45">45</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'><span style="margin-left: 2em;">3. THE FAT GENTLEMAN'S STORY,</span></td><td align='right'><a href="#Page_86">86</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>POSTSCRIPT BY THE OLD BACHELOR,</td><td align='right'><a href="#Page_90">90</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>CONCLUSION,</td><td align='right'><a href="#Page_132">132</a></td></tr>
+</table></div>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[7]</a></span></p>
+<h2>NEIGHBOR NELLY.</h2>
+
+<h3>IN THREE STORIES.</h3>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<h2>THE OLD BACHELOR'S STORY.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">In</span> the city block where I live,
+there are just twenty-four houses on
+the other side of the street, and twenty-four
+on this side, six lamp posts, and
+eight ailanthus trees in green boxes.
+Oh, dear me, what a tiresome row!
+That's what I thought when I first
+came to lodge here; for, as I am an
+old bachelor, I don't want a whole<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[8]</a></span>
+house to myself; but now, when I sit
+at my window and look out at the
+street, I find no end of things to amuse
+and interest me; particularly when
+the gas is lighted of an evening, and I
+can see a little way into the parlors
+of the opposite neighbors. I suppose
+they know that an old bachelor like
+Josiah Oldbird can do no harm by
+looking on at their evening amusements;
+so they do not pull the blinds
+down if they chance to see me, sitting
+lonely at my window, and willing to
+accept such crumbs of their society
+and happiness as I can glean over the
+way.</p>
+
+<p>First, then, is the family at No. 7,
+three maiden sisters and a bachelor
+brother. As I don't in the least know<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[9]</a></span>
+their names, I have dubbed them the
+Bluejays, because the three maiden
+sisters always wear blue merino gowns
+in winter, and blue muslin ones in
+summer; and because they are all so
+fond of singing that no family of birds
+could be more musical. They have a
+pet poodle and a pet squirrel, too.
+The poodle is very fat, and his hair
+sticks out so much all over him, that
+he looks perpetually astonished, as if
+he had just seen a spook. He always
+stands on the window sill, when the
+sash is raised of an afternoon, and
+glares into the street until he sees the
+bachelor brother coming. Then he
+achieves a series of frantic yells and
+bounces, until somebody comes to
+open the door and lets him out, when<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[10]</a></span>
+he waddles to the front steps to meet
+his master, wagging his tail to that
+tremendous extent, that it looks like
+the shuttle of a steam power loom.</p>
+
+<p>The squirrel is slim and sleek, and
+seems to enjoy life amazingly, he hops
+about so. When one of the Miss Bluejays
+takes him in her arms, he won't
+stay there, but gets away, and walks
+all over her head and shoulders; and
+at last runs down her back and disappears.</p>
+<div class="figright" style="width: 202px;">
+<img src="images/i002.jpg" width="202" height="200" alt="Sit down on a chair" title="" />
+</div>
+
+<p>Then, at No. 11, a very fat gentleman
+lives with his fat and pretty wife,
+and round dumpling of a baby. As I
+don't know him either, I call him Mr.
+Fatty, and he seems to be a "good-natured
+giant." I saw a little boy actually
+stop short to stare at him the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[11]</a></span>
+other day, when he was sitting out at
+his front door&mdash;he is such a regular
+roly-poly of a gentleman&mdash;but he only
+laughed good-temperedly, and never
+got vexed in the least. I don't advise
+you to try this with all fat gentlemen
+though; they might accidentally sit
+down on a chair&mdash;where you were&mdash;afterward,
+and that would be the last
+of you. This piece of advice, however,
+is a great secret between you and me!</p>
+
+
+<p>He is so glad to meet the fat baby<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</a></span>
+when he comes home at night, that I
+can see him in the parlor first kissing
+it almost black and blue, and then tossing
+it up in the air until I feel as though
+its head must come bump against the
+ceiling, but it doesn't&mdash;and at last,
+carrying it off perched on his shoulder,
+and looking very much perturbed
+in its spirits.</p>
+
+<p>But the pleasantest neighbors of
+all live exactly opposite, at No. 9.
+They take tea every evening in the
+back parlor; and as the front window
+shades are up, and only the back
+room lighted, I can always see them
+at their cheerful meal. The rooms are
+furnished in winter with dark red velvet
+carpets and furniture; with red
+damask curtains and red velvet paper<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</a></span>
+hangings. In summer they put up
+white curtains, and carpets and furniture
+have cool, cream-colored linen
+coverings, so that the parlors look
+cozy and charming at all seasons.</p>
+
+<p>As for the family there is a papa
+and mamma, of course, and a dear little
+girl and boy. The little girl is about
+ten years old, I should think, with
+great, dark-blue eyes, and curling auburn
+hair. Her cheeks are as rosy as
+ripe peaches, and her teeth as white
+as so many pearls. Her nose does
+turn up at the end a little, to be sure;
+but that is rather saucy and becoming
+than otherwise; and she always looks
+so sweet tempered, and full of fun, too,
+when I see her of an evening, that I
+am sure she is as good as pie, and as<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</a></span>
+merry as a cricket! Her little brother,
+who is a year or two younger,
+looks very much like her, and their
+obedient and pretty behavior at table
+is something really beautiful to observe.</p>
+
+<p>It is nearly a year now, since I
+moved into my lodging at "No. 10,"
+and began to wonder what No. 9's
+name was; and now I must make
+haste and tell you how, only last June,
+I became acquainted with these dear
+little neighbors of mine.</p>
+
+<p>One pleasant Friday morning, after
+breakfast, I put on my old-fashioned
+beaver hat, and taking my gold-headed
+cane in one hand and my market
+basket in the other, I trotted out to
+buy something nice for dinner; for,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[15]</a></span>
+you see, I am a particular old bachelor,
+and like to market for myself.</p>
+
+<p>Just as I was coming down the
+steps, the door of No. 9 opened, and
+the little girl ran down <i>her</i> steps. She
+looked so bright and pretty in her
+cunning round straw hat with the blue
+ribbons, and white Marseilles cloak,
+carrying her satchel of books and
+lunch basket in her hand, that I could
+not help nodding to her. So she nodded
+to me, and then <i>I</i> nodded again
+and smiled, and we each walked along
+on our own side of the way. When
+we came to the corner I thought I
+would cross over and scrape some
+more acquaintance with my little
+neighbor. Now on the side of her
+satchel, I saw, when I came near her,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[16]</a></span>
+was printed in gold letters, "Nelly
+Lawson;" so I said, as cheerily as I
+could, in my old, quavering voice:</p>
+
+<p>"Good morning, Neighbor Nelly!"</p>
+
+<p>The little maiden looked up in my
+face in a shy fashion at first; but when
+she saw what a mild, gray-headed old
+bachelor had bade her good morning,
+she took courage, and answered,
+"Good morning, sir."</p>
+
+<p>"So you are going to school this
+fine day?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yes; I go to school, but brother
+Jimmy doesn't; he learns at home. I
+think he is going next year. Have you
+got a baby at your house? We have."</p>
+
+<p>"No," said I, sighing; "I haven't
+got any baby; I am an old bachelor.
+Will you marry me?"<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[17]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"Oh, I am too little," she replied
+quite seriously. "You will have to wait
+until I grow up to you."</p>
+
+<p>I laughed, and asked her, "Don't
+you want to go to market with me
+before you go to school? There is
+plenty of time."</p>
+
+<p>"No," replied my little neighbor,
+firmly; "I can't go anywheres that
+mamma does not know of."</p>
+
+<p>"That's right!" I said. "Don't do
+anything your mother would disapprove.
+Well, Neighbor Nelly, since
+you won't go to market with me, I
+must go to school with you; and tell
+your mother that Neighbor Josiah
+Oldbird would like you to take a walk
+with him to-morrow; will you?"</p>
+
+<p>"Oh yes! that would be real<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[18]</a></span>
+nice!" said my little neighbor with
+a joyous skip.</p>
+
+<p>By this time we were walking
+along hand in hand; and soon, seeing
+my little neighbor look in at the window
+of the candy shop round the corner
+from our street, I thought I would
+take her in and buy her some candy.
+So in we marched, Nelly's great blue
+eyes dancing with pleased expectation,
+and stood close by the counter, waiting
+for our turn to come. There were
+a good many people in the candy
+shop, and we had to wait some time;
+so, to amuse ourselves, Neighbor Nelly
+and I turned round, and began
+looking at the funny folks near us.</p>
+
+<p>There was one very fat old country
+woman, who seemed to be buying<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[19]</a></span>
+"quarter or pound," as she said, of
+every kind of candy in the shop. As
+soon as the papers were handed to
+her she began eating out of them, and
+before she left, I should think, she had
+eaten about two pounds of candy.
+Besides the old woman, there were a
+great many little children, who only
+wanted a penny's worth each; but
+they hesitated so long whether to
+have "taffie" or "molasses," a lemon-candy
+horse, or a cinnamon-candy
+trumpet, that they were the most
+troublesome customers of anybody.
+Then there were several older boys
+and girls; some, I am sorry to say,
+picking up a loose bit of candy every
+time the shopman turned away&mdash;as if
+that were not stealing; and finally,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[20]</a></span>
+there was Neighbor Nelly and I, who
+did none of these things, but just
+looked on, and waited until the shopman
+came to serve us.</p>
+
+<p>I bought some lemon candy, as
+clear as a bit of yellow glass, and
+some pungent cinnamon, and delectable
+chocolate; and then I popped the
+papers into Neighbor Nelly's satchel,
+and we hurried on to school. We had
+not far to go now, and when we came
+to the house, my little new friend bid
+me good-by, and thanked me so
+sweetly, that I went away quite a
+happy old bachelor.</p>
+
+<p>In the evening I was looking out
+of my window as usual, when I saw
+the servant girl come in to light the
+gas in the back parlor at No. 9, with<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[21]</a></span>
+Neighbor Nelly and the little brother
+Jimmy behind her. While she was
+setting the tea table, the children
+came running to the window, and
+both nodded and smiled at me. Presently
+the little boy thrust both hands
+in his pockets, and held them up
+crammed full of candy. "Thank you,
+Mr. Old Bachelor!" he shouted; "we
+like you real well!"</p>
+
+<p>That made me real happy; for I
+am not a crabbed old bachelor by any
+means. In a minute more their father
+came home; and as they all sat around
+the pleasant tea table, I hope they
+talked of their lonely old neighbor,
+who watched them from his window.</p>
+
+<p>The next morning, as I was reading
+the paper, in came the servant and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[22]</a></span>
+gave me the funniest little note! It
+was addressed on the outside, "To my
+neighbor Oldbird," and ran thus:</p>
+
+<div class="blockquot">"<span class="smcap">My dear Neighbor</span>:
+
+<p>"Mamma says I may take a walk
+with you this morning, because you
+are a good old bachelor. Jimmy wants
+to go, and Gipsey. Gipsey is my dog.
+He is black and tan, and his tail curls
+round so, that papa says you might
+use it for a cork-screw. Jimmy and I
+mean to try some time. Gipsey likes
+to be on the seashore, and so does
+baby. We are going there next week&mdash;to
+Long Branch. I hope you will
+write me a letter when I am gone, and
+I am&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Your affectionate</p>
+
+<div class='sig'>"<span class="smcap">Neighbor Nelly</span>.<br />
+</div>
+
+<p>"<small>Saturday Morning.</small>"</p></div><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[23]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>You may believe how pleased I
+was with this dear little note, and I
+thought I would answer it. So I sat
+down at my writing desk, found a
+cunning little sheet of paper, with a
+flag on it, and commenced.</p>
+
+<p>Now I happened to think, at that
+moment, of some very comical letters
+written by the great poet, Tom Hood,
+to his little friends on the seashore;
+and as they were ever so much funnier
+than anything I could have written,
+I copied one of them out, and sent it
+to my little new friend.</p>
+
+<div class="blockquot">"<span class="smcap">My dear Neighbor Nelly</span>:
+
+<p>"I am very glad you are to walk
+with me, and very sorry you are going
+away so soon. Do you like to be on<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[24]</a></span>
+the seashore? I did, when I was a
+boy. I and my brother chucked hundreds
+of stones into the sea, when we
+were there, but we came away before
+we could fill it up. Then there is the
+fun of finding shiny pebbles and jelly
+fish on the beach. I used to think
+jelly fish were made of sea-calves' feet,
+and no flavoring. I suppose the mermaids
+eat them at their parties.</p>
+
+<p>"Then there's fishing on the seaside.
+I used to catch flat fish sometimes,
+with a long string line, it was
+like swimming a kite. If you go out
+in a surf boat, take care it does not
+"flounder" and get "squamped," as
+some people say, instead of founder
+and swamped.</p>
+
+<p>"Have you ever been bathed in<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[25]</a></span>
+the sea? I was, and, dear me! how
+I kicked and screamed; or, at least,
+tried to scream, but the sea, ships and
+all, began to run into my mouth, and
+so I shut it up. Remember, when you
+are bathing, if you meet with a shark,
+the best way is to bite off his legs, if
+you can, before he walks away with
+yours; and pray, pray, pray take care
+of yourself in the sea, for in some
+places, they say, it has not even a
+bottom to go to.</p>
+
+<p>"Could you bring me a little crab
+off the beach? If you would catch
+one for me, and teach it to shake
+hands without nipping and biting, it
+would make me quite happy, for I
+have not had any toys or playthings
+in a long time. It would be a good<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[26]</a></span>
+plan to hire a little crab to teach the
+baby to crawl, if he can't walk yet.
+Bless him! But I must not write on
+him <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'anx'">any</ins> more; he is so soft, and I
+have nothing but steel pens.</p>
+
+<p>"Now good-by; give my love to
+everybody, and my compliments to all
+the rest, and believe me, up hill and
+down dale,</p>
+
+<div class='sig'>
+<span style="margin-right: 4em;">"Your affectionate neighbor,</span><br />
+"<span class="smcap">Josiah Oldbird.</span>"<br />
+</div></div>
+
+<p>Then I put my letter in a flag envelope,
+sealed it up tight, and wrote
+on it, "To my dear Neighbor Nelly,"
+and had the maid take it to her.</p>
+
+<p>Presently I could see two little
+figures flitting about in one of the upper
+chambers, and soon after all four<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[27]</a></span>
+of us, Nelly, Jimmy, I, and Gipsey,
+were in the street. Gipsey was a "toy
+terrier" that ought to have belonged
+to "Commodore Nutt," the dwarf at
+"Barnum's," and ran along on three
+legs most of the time, with the fourth,
+and his cork-screw tail elevated in
+the air for joy at being allowed to join
+the party; while the children were all
+hop, skip, and jump, and kept tight
+hold of a hand of mine apiece, as
+though they were afraid of flying
+away if they let go. Meanwhile, I
+walked quietly along, with my market
+basket on my arm, a sober old bachelor.
+I expect the people who passed
+us in the street thought me a rather
+incongruous addition to such a frisky
+party; but then, you know, children<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[28]</a></span>
+<i>must</i> caper about. Bless your heart!
+it would never do in the world to see
+children mincing solemnly along, like
+little old men and women; it would
+be as absurd as to have my Neighbor
+Nelly wearing her great-grandmother's
+coal-scuttle bonnet! The last idea
+struck me as so odd, that I drew a
+little picture of Neighbor Nelly in this
+guise when I got home, and here it is.
+How do you like it?</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 294px;">
+<img src="images/i003.jpg" width="294" height="300" alt="In the bonnet" title="" />
+</div><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[29]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>We thought we would go to market
+first. So we walked slowly down
+Fourth Avenue, and crossed over to
+the market where the Seventh Regiment
+armory is, opposite the Cooper
+Institute.</p>
+
+<p>"My cousin is a Seventh Regimenter!"
+said Jimmy as we climbed
+up the iron steps; "he often let us
+look on at his company drills last winter,
+and afterward Nelly and I drilled
+in our yard. The big boy who comes
+to see the old ladies next door, looked
+over the fence and laughed at us, but
+we didn't care; and we mean to fight
+for our country like everything when
+we are bigger; that is, I mean to, and
+Nelly would like to, but she's only a
+girl, you know."<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[30]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"Only a girl!" repeated Nelly,
+tossing her long curls; "girls are a
+great deal of use, too; I mended all
+his stockings and all papa's this week&mdash;think
+of that, neighbor Oldbird!"</p>
+
+<p>"That was really splendid!" said
+I; and just then we entered the market.</p>
+
+<p>The very first thing we met was a
+horrid big dog, that belonged to some
+butcher; and, bless me! how he began
+to show his great rows of teeth,
+and growl at Gipsey! Nelly gave a
+little scream, and tried to hide behind
+me; Jimmy valiantly flew at the big
+dog with my walking stick; and poor
+little Gipsey nearly stood on the end
+of his tail with fright, and squealed
+dismally. What a fuss we were all<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[31]</a></span>
+in, to be sure! So at last, to quiet the
+disputants, I caught Gipsey up, and
+put him in my coat pocket, where he
+sat, looking out at the top, very much
+comforted.</p>
+
+<p>Then we turned to the right, and
+went by the brightest and prettiest
+stall in the whole market. It was
+kept by a Frenchman, who, in his
+own language, would be called a
+"<i>charcutier;</i>" but Jimmy and Nell
+shouted out together "Oh, there's the
+<i>pig man!</i>" as loud as ever they could,
+and then stopped, blushing very much,
+because they were afraid the pork
+merchant heard them. I expect he
+did; for he looked very funny when
+we came close, and smoothing down
+his snowy apron with his fat hands,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[32]</a></span>
+said "Bonjour, mademoiselle!" and
+laughed good humoredly. There was
+a great "head cheese" on the pig
+man's marble counter, moulded in the
+shape of a boar's head. The tusks
+were made of white carrots, the eyes
+of red jelly, and the sides of the dish
+it was on were beautifully ornamented
+with white roses, cut out of turnips,
+and parsley foliage. Then there were
+ever so many pork pies, with the most
+elegant wreaths of flowers on the top
+crust, comical little hams already
+cooked, and fat dumplings of sucking
+pigs, as pink as baby himself!</p>
+
+<p>When we had looked about us a little,
+we concluded to buy a pork pie of
+the pig man; and while that was being
+nicely packed up in paper, out popped<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[33]</a></span>
+Gipsey from my pocket, and stood
+triumphant on the counter, in the
+midst of the little pigs and savory pastries.
+I don't know what forays he
+would not have made upon them, if
+he had not been captured by the pig
+man, Jimmy, and me; but he did contrive
+to jump right into the very middle
+of another pork-pie! and then we
+had to pay for that, too; and wipe
+the gravy off Gipsey's feet and the
+ends of his tail and nose, and button
+him up tight in the market basket for
+half an hour, as a punishment for his
+naughtiness. As to the pie we had
+bought, Jimmy carried that, and Gipsey
+cut up so many antics inside the
+basket, that he nearly wriggled it out
+of my hand altogether.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[34]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>After that we went on, and found,
+dear me! such a comfortable old market
+woman, who sold us a nice little
+chicken, and some fresh vegetables,
+and gave the children each a great
+handful of cherries; but we had to
+tell her to send them home, with our
+pie, because Gipsey had the basket in
+possession.</p>
+
+<p>Then we walked into the street
+again, and when we had let Gipsey
+out of prison, concluded to leave the
+basket at my baker's, and take a walk
+in Broadway. Dear, dear me! what
+quantities of shop windows there were
+to stare into, and how we flattened
+our three noses, and spread our six
+hands all over every one of them,
+while we admired the splendid picture<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[35]</a></span>
+books, the stores of sugar plums,
+or the wonders of toys they contained!
+While we were occupied in this way, a
+little girl, poorly dressed, and lugging
+a large bundle of work in both arms,
+came along, and stopping beside us at
+the window of the most splendid toy
+shop, stood looking wistfully in.</p>
+
+<p>Neighbor Nelly straightway twitched
+my hand, and whispered, "Oh look,
+Neighbor Oldbird! what a poor little
+girl! I don't suppose she ever saw a
+doll before in her life. How she must
+wish she had one!"</p>
+
+<p>"Suppose we ask her?" I said.</p>
+
+<p>"Will you ask?" she answered;
+"I don't like to."</p>
+
+<p>"Nonsense! ask her yourself; she
+won't eat you, or Gipsey either;" for<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[36]</a></span>
+Gipsey was sidling away between my
+feet, as if he were alarmed too; the
+saucy scamp!</p>
+
+<p>Thereupon Nelly moved closer to
+the poor girl, and said, in a kind, little,
+timid voice, "Do you like dolls?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, very much!" said the child,
+with a surprised look.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, so do I!" cried Nelly, rapturously.
+"I have lots of them at
+home; let me see, there's Jenny, and
+Willie, and old black Nanny, and&mdash;"
+she stopped short, seeing the other
+look wistfully at her, and then said,
+"Oh, I forgot! you have none, perhaps;
+would you like to have one?"</p>
+
+<p>"Oh yes, miss!" said the child;
+"not so much for myself, though, as
+my little sister; she is sick, and can't<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[37]</a></span>
+do anything, poor Clara! but I work,
+and help my mother!" she added,
+proudly.</p>
+
+<p>"What does your mother do?"
+asked Jimmy.</p>
+
+<p>"She makes shirts for the army;
+and I do all the button holes."</p>
+
+<p>"I can't make a button hole," said
+Nelly, regretfully.</p>
+
+<p>Here I proposed we should walk
+into the shop, and after we had looked
+all we wanted to at the pretty things,
+and the children, with screams of delight,
+had ridden in turn on a "spring
+rocking horse," that sent them flying
+half way to the top of the glass cases
+behind the counter, I gave Jimmy and
+Nelly each two shillings, and told them
+to buy whatever the little girl would<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[38]</a></span>
+like best. The poor little thing's eyes
+sparkled with happiness when Nelly
+bought her the composition doll she
+chose out of a heap that were piled in
+a great basket, gorgeously dressed in
+pink mosquito netting, as I thought, but
+which Nelly informed me was a "tarletane;"
+and Jimmy laid out his money
+on a tiny bowl and pitcher of sprigged
+china ware, and an astonished china
+baby sitting in a bath, and looking as
+if it had turned on the hot water, and
+couldn't turn it off again.</p>
+
+<p>Then we trundled Gipsey about a
+little in a wicker wagon we found, and
+put him in the patent baby-jumper to
+take an airing; and at last, when we
+had teased him till he barked like one
+of the toy poodles on the shelves, we<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[39]</a></span>
+took ourselves off, and sent the poor
+child on her way rejoicing.</p>
+
+<p>But it was getting late, and time
+to trot home, before His Majesty the
+Sun roasted us all like so many eggs.
+Our street is always shady and cool, it
+seems to me, and we were glad enough
+to find ourselves once more on its
+pavement. I invited Nelly and Jimmy
+and Gipsey all to take lunch with
+me, and didn't we have fun! We <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'eat'">ate</ins>
+the pork pie, and stuffed Gipsey with
+lumps of sugar, and discovered a pot
+of raspberry jam in the closet, and ornamented
+ourselves with red rims
+round our mouths, digging it out; and
+sliced, and buttered, and disposed of
+almost half a loaf of French bread,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[40]</a></span>
+and hardly stopped laughing, chattering,
+and barking a single minute.</p>
+
+<p>And then, after all this was over,
+my little neighbors bid me good-by,
+and Gipsey barked at me and poked
+his cold nose into my hand, which
+meant "Good-by and thank you," all
+the same, and the three went home as
+merry as crickets.</p>
+
+<p>I could not see much of my little
+neighbors before they went away the
+next Tuesday, but I was invited to
+take tea at No. 9 the very last evening;
+and then, what should I find out
+but that Nelly's mamma was the
+daughter of an old friend of mine
+whom I had not seen for years! So
+we felt quite like relations right away.
+Just as tea was over, lo and behold!<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[41]</a></span>
+there was a tremendous hullaballoo
+on the back piazza, and when we
+poked our heads out of the window to
+see what the matter was, there was
+Gipsey high and dry on the back of
+Miss Bluejay's fat poodle&mdash;having
+squeezed through the railing which
+separated the two piazzas&mdash;with the
+squirrel, which had come to the rescue
+of his friend, hanging on to his tail!
+and all three setting up a squeal of remonstrance.
+Gipsey's plight was so
+extremely well deserved, that we
+wouldn't go to his rescue; but at last,
+with a tremendous twist, he snatched
+away his cork-screw tail, and ran to
+hide himself and his injured feelings
+under the sofa in the front room.
+How we laughed at him! and how<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[42]</a></span>
+Nelly tried to make him come out
+and be lump-sugared into good humor,
+but he wouldn't; so, to make up,
+we coaxed the fat poodle, which had
+been staring in at the performance and
+sniffing satisfaction, to sit up and beg
+for us until we gave him the lump of
+sugar. Then Mrs. Lawson sat down
+to the piano, and began playing a
+funny little hornpipe tune that sounded
+just like a banjo; and, to our astonishment,
+the fat poodle developed
+another accomplishment; for, getting
+on his hind legs, he gravely hopped
+up and down on the piazza, keeping
+time to the music, until we nearly
+died of laughter.</p>
+
+<p>You may fancy, after all these
+comical doings, that we managed to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[43]</a></span>
+spend a merry evening, and when I at
+last bid my neighbors good night, it
+was no longer with the feeling that I
+was a lonely old bachelor.</p>
+
+<p>I did find the street pretty lonely
+though, after they had gone, next
+day, with two great big trunks
+strapped on behind the carriage, a
+middling sized trunk hoisted up in
+front, and several small carpet bags,
+and tiny tawny bundles and baskets
+in every place where room could be
+found. I fancy Gipsey was in one of
+the baskets, by the way it bounced
+and wriggled about in Neighbor Nelly's
+lap; but I don't know; I only
+saw it from my window, whence I
+waved an adieu to them as they rolled
+away.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[44]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>A few days after they had gone,
+I thought I would amuse myself, in
+their absence, by trying to find out if
+any of the other neighbors knew anything
+about my neighbor, Nelly. I
+succeeded in learning what two of
+them knew, and they shall tell it for
+themselves in the stories that follow,
+and which I have written out. And
+now, if any other dear little children
+have been pleased with me, in what I
+have told of my walks and talks with
+Neighbor Nelly, just let them come to
+No. 10, and meet the hearty greeting
+and loving welcome of the</p>
+
+<div class='sig'><span class="smcap">Old Bachelor</span>!<br />
+</div>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[45]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE BIG BOY'S STORY.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> want me to tell you what I
+know about the pretty little girl next
+door? Well, I'm ready to begin, if
+you won't mind my talk; I'm only a
+boy, you know, and can't use fine
+words&mdash;that's all humbug.</p>
+
+<p>My name is Tom Halstead. I am
+nephew to the Miss Brandlaws, who
+live at No. 7. The idea of calling my
+darling old friskies "The Bluejays!"
+(If you don't give me that Australian
+post stamp I saw in your desk, I'll tell<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[46]</a></span>
+'em, too!) However, to go on with
+my story.</p>
+
+<p>One morning last winter, just at
+the end of the Christmas holidays,
+while I was on a visit there, I didn't
+know what on earth to do with myself.
+So I caught Poddles (that's the
+poodle), dressed him up in Aunt Elsie's
+nightcap, tied a life preserver round
+him, and put him in the portable
+shower-bath, just for fun; it didn't
+hurt him a bit, and&mdash;would you believe
+it? the hateful thing hopped
+out, squealing murder, shook himself
+all over the carpet, scratched off the
+nightcap, and danced round the room
+with it in a fury, till it was in perfect
+rags.</p>
+
+<p>Up rushed Aunt Elsie, and was so<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[47]</a></span>
+horrified when she saw the carpet and
+her cap in such a mess, and "darling
+doggie" all "wetsey-petsey," that she
+locked me up in my room for the rest
+of the day on bread and water! and
+there was gingerbread, with raisins
+in it, baking down stairs!! Horrid!!!</p>
+
+<p>Of course I couldn't spend my time
+sucking my thumbs; so, like a sensible
+fellow, I set myself to find some better
+employment, and soon a grand idea
+came into my head. I had just finished
+reading a jolly old-fashioned
+novel I found in Uncle Herbert's
+room, called "The Castle Spectre: a
+Tale of Spain;" where a goose of a
+lover, such a spooney! had scrambled
+down from the top of a castle, hanging<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[48]</a></span>
+on to his bedclothes. <i>Now</i>, don't
+you see it? Perhaps not, so I'll explain.</p>
+
+<p>My bedroom is the third floor, back
+room, always; and you know that piazza
+at the back of the house? Well,
+what did I do, but twitch off <i>my</i> bedcover&mdash;nice
+white one it was, too&mdash;tie
+it to the bedpost, and let the end
+hang out of the window. Then I
+scrambled out, and slid down the wall
+like a streak of lightning! You can't
+think what jolly fun it was!</p>
+
+<p>There was lots of amusement in
+the yard; twelve cats on the fence to
+plague, and no end of snow to make
+balls and pelt the cook with; beside,
+the gingerbread was just baked, and
+I got a <i>brown corner!</i> So! there!<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[49]</a></span>
+while I was eating it, and it was so
+hot that it almost sizzled, all at once
+I heard a lot of noise in the next
+yard. Some boys seemed to be having
+a drill there; so I ran up the steps
+leading from the piazza to the ground,
+and looked over the fence. But lor
+now! what do you think? one of the
+boys was a girl! She had on long
+india-rubber boots, and I called out,
+"Go it, Boots!"</p>
+
+<p>Then the little boy that was with
+her, who seemed to be her brother,
+looked so mad at me! and, really and
+truly, I couldn't help plaguing them a
+little. I know you think I was real
+mean; but if you had seen how funny
+they looked, in paper cocked hats,
+with turkey tails for feathers, and the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[50]</a></span>
+little boy thumping a big tin saucepan
+for a drum, you would have laughed,
+too; so you needn't look so provoked,
+Neighbor Oldbird!</p>
+
+<p>"Gee up, awkward squad!" I
+said; "double quick halt on the
+right flank! Ha-ahup!"</p>
+
+<p>But the little girl only laughed
+good humoredly, and said: "Jimmy
+and I belong to the Seventh Regiment,
+and drill in the last fashion.
+Don't you want to come and learn the
+Lefferts Tactics?"</p>
+
+<p>Wasn't she a nice little thing!
+Never got mad or anything, but just
+gave me back as good as I sent. I
+declare, I fell right smack in love with
+her that minute, and I don't care a fig
+now for the girl I met in dancing<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[51]</a></span>
+school, upon my word I don't; so I
+rushed back into the kitchen, coaxed
+the cook to give me two more hunks
+of gingerbread, and called out, "Won't
+you have some cake?"</p>
+
+<p>They came running up on the piazza
+like lamplighters; and while they
+were eating the gingerbread, <i>I</i> was
+eating something I got especially for
+myself at the same time. Did you ever
+try it? You have a great big sour
+apple, as cold as it can be, and a tremendous
+pickled pepper, as hot as it
+can be; then you take first a bite of
+the pepper, and nearly burn all the
+skin off your throat, and then a bite
+of the apple to cool it again; and so
+on. It's gorgeous, I tell you!</p>
+
+<p>Presently the little boy (whose<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[52]</a></span>
+name, as I said, was Jimmy), stopped
+his eating to ask me, "Do you live in
+New York?"</p>
+
+<p>"No, I live at White Plains. I go
+to the Military Academy there; don't
+you want me to show you some
+drill?"</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, Cousin Charley is going to
+teach us some time. He belongs to
+the Seventh Regiment. We love to be
+soldiers, though, and we know a boy,
+Freddy Jourdain his name is, who got
+up a whole regiment, and has parades,
+and went into camp, and everything."</p>
+
+<p>"We have a camp at White Plains,"
+I told them. "Do you ever go there
+in summer, Miss&mdash;&mdash;" here I stopped,
+rather awkwardly, not knowing what
+her name was.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[53]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"Oh, I'm not 'Miss' anybody;"
+she said; "I'm Nelly; but we go to
+the seashore in summer 'most always."</p>
+
+<p>"Can't you dress up in your uniform,
+and show us how you look at
+school?" said Jimmy.</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, if you like;" here I remembered
+that the key of my room was in
+Aunt Elsie's pocket, and had to say,
+"but I can't get into my room now; I
+was locked in, and Aunt Elsie has the
+key."</p>
+
+<p>"How do you come to be here,
+then?" said Nelly; "why, dear me,
+just look at the counterpane hanging
+out of the window; how funny!"</p>
+
+<p>"Why, that's the way I got out!"
+I said; and so I told them all about<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[54]</a></span>
+"The Castle Spectre," and "Lord
+Alonzo Algernon" Spooneyman, and
+we got into such a perfect <i>gig</i> of
+laughter, that we nearly rode off in it!
+(Now, don't say that's not a good joke,
+or I'll not tell another word of my
+story.)</p>
+
+<p>Just then out came Poddles, looking
+as surprised as ever; and Nelly
+exclaimed, "Oh, there's that funny old
+dog! what do you call him?"</p>
+
+<p>"His name is Poddles!" said I;
+"<i>I</i> christened him."</p>
+
+<p>"What a queer name!" said Jimmy;
+"let's take him into our house
+and see what Gipsey and he will do!"</p>
+
+<p>"Good!" said I. So, without remembering
+that plaguey white spread,
+I cut over the piazza railings with<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[55]</a></span>
+Poddles under one arm, and we all
+three rushed up stairs together.</p>
+
+<p>They had such a famous play room,
+with a splendid swing, and a teetertorter,
+and ten-pins, and I don't know
+what beside; and there was the nattiest
+little dog! but you know him,
+that "toy-terrier" of theirs. Poddles
+looked a greater fright than ever
+beside him; so, to pay him off, we put
+that wretched Pod into a basket, tied
+it fast to the swing, and swung him
+up to the ceiling. It frightened him
+half to death, and serve him right, for
+being so ugly! after which he and
+Gipsey went to sleep in a big rocking
+chair, as friendly as possible. Then I
+gave Nelly a splendid swing, "ran under,"
+and cracked my cocoanut three<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[56]</a></span>
+times, beside making my arms ache
+like everything; but I didn't care, she
+was such a dear little thing.</p>
+
+<p>Afterward Jimmy went and got a
+great plateful of rosy apples; and just
+as we were eating them, and having
+such fun, up came one of our girls,
+and said that "Miss Brandlaw wanted
+Master Tom right home!" Wasn't it
+hateful? But, of course, I had to go;
+so I bundled Poddles under my arm
+again, bid them good-by, and walked
+off with Mary; but I poked her ribs
+and set Poddles at her all the way,
+which was some comfort.</p>
+
+<p>I expected a scolding when I came
+home, and I didn't have one&mdash;oh no!
+Aunt Elsie wanted to know where I
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[57]</a></span>thought I should die when I went to&mdash;(no,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">I believe it was the other way,</span><br />
+but never mind)&mdash;if I hung best bed
+spreads out of the window, and left
+my room without permission? besides
+informing me that she should write to
+ma', and have me sent for. Finally,
+she marched me up stairs again; and
+when I said I <i>must</i> have something to
+do to keep me out of mischief, she
+gave me a Sunday school book to
+read, and took herself off.</p>
+
+<p>Of course you will say I was dreadfully
+wicked not to like the Sunday
+school book, but I couldn't. It was
+so full of hard names and long words,
+and was all about sanctification and
+justification and regeneration, and
+how was I to understand a word of
+it? I love Bible stories, but I don't<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[58]</a></span>
+think there is a boy or girl who <i>understands
+hard doctrines</i>. Do you,
+Neighbor Oldbird?</p>
+
+<p>I pretty soon gave up that employment,
+and amused myself instead with
+pelting the cats on the fence with a
+few marbles, and trying on my uniform,
+to see how I looked in it; until
+Aunt Elsie relented, I suppose, for she
+came up and asked me through the
+keyhole if I was sorry, and wouldn't
+do any more. You can fancy what
+my answer was, and after dinner I got
+permission to go out and play on the
+sidewalk.</p>
+
+<p>Neighbor Nelly and Jimmy joined
+me there pretty soon, and we had
+such fun playing "tag" and driving
+hoop. It wasn't hoop <i>time</i>, to be<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[59]</a></span>
+sure, but that was no matter. Then,
+when we were tired of that, we all sat
+down together on the upper step of
+No. 9, and began talking about their
+school and mine, and what we learned.</p>
+
+<p>"Do you ever learn pieces of poetry?"
+asked Nelly. "My teacher,
+Miss Backboard, always gives the girls
+each a piece of poetry every Friday;
+so we call that poetry day."</p>
+
+<p>"I used to learn pieces too," I
+said; "but I don't care much for poetry
+unless it's funny."</p>
+
+<p>"Tell us a funny piece," said Jimmy.</p>
+
+<p>"Ah yes, do!" added Nelly; and,
+of course, when a <i>lady</i> asked me I
+had to, though I felt pretty bashful;
+so I began.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[60]</a></span></p>
+
+
+<div class='center'>A DAY OF MISHAPS.<br />
+
+(<small>AS TOLD BY BOBBY BREAKWINDOW, A SCHOOLBOY.</small>)</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+<div class='hang1'>
+Oh dear! was there ever anybody so unlucky as I am,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>From General &mdash;&mdash;, who lost that battle t'other day, all the way back to Priam!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Come, sit down&mdash;do, and let me tell you all about it, and what's the matter;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Perhaps it will do me good to have a nice, comfortable, miserable chatter.</div>
+<div class='hang1'>To begin, then. This morning I woke, and thought I was up with the sun.</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[61]</a></span>So never hurried myself; but dressed slow, and came down, to find breakfast all done,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And nothing left for me but one cold slapjack, and all the chicken gone,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Unless, to be sure, I could have eaten the drumsticks, and one perfectly clean breast bone!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And, of course, I had to make haste, for it was nine o'clock and after,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And the master had offered a prize to the earliest boy&mdash;and here was I beaten by even lazy Tommy Shafter!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>But it was no use to fret, so I snatched up my satchel, and would have been off in a minute,</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[62]</a></span>When lo and behold! my geography was gone; and though we hunted the house, it was plain it wasn't in it,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Till at last I remembered that yesterday I had gone after school to the dog pound,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And then been fishing with Fred Lee; so, probably, it was at the bottom of the frog pond!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Well, off to school I went, and came in after every schoolmate;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>So, to pay me off, the schoolmaster and all the boys called me Bobby Toolate!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>But that wasn't all; for the class was just up for spelling,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And I didn't know the lesson, and Tommy Shafter prompted me to spell boots <i>butes;</i> and that's all I got for telling,</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[63]</a></span>Besides going to the foot of the class, and having to get the lesson over;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>I tell you what! a hand-organ monkey's life, compared to a schoolboy's, is perfect rolling in clover!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And I wish I was a monkey, if I did get beaten&mdash;yes, that I do&mdash;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>In a red coat all over spangles, and blue trowsers, and a long tail behind to come through!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Well, thank goodness, it's over; but that's not the half of my pother;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>For the very minute I got out of school, Tommy Shafter began to plague and bother,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And wanted me to ride on the gate with him that goes in to his grandfather Chowser's;</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[64]</a></span>So I did; but there's spikes on the top of that gate; and, confound it, I went to work and tore my trowsers!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Just then along came Miss Kitty Snow, and didn't I look dashing,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And that hateful Tommy Shafter bawled out "How are you, trowsers?" and jumped down and walked off with her; but just see if I don't give him a thrashing!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>To pay him off for what he did and more too; for, when I came home weeping and wailing,</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[65]</a></span>Pa boxed my ears, and said I was such a bad boy I shouldn't go with him now out sailing;</div>
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 350px;">
+<img src="images/i004.jpg" width="350" height="253" alt="Boxed my ears" title="" />
+</div>
+
+<div class='hang1'>So I had the pleasure of seeing the rockaway drive up to the door,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And pa and ma getting in, and sister Tilly, and brother Sam, and ever so many more,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>All looking so happy and gay, and not caring a bit for poor Bobby,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Just as if I <i>wanted</i> to get into scrapes, and mischief and bad conduct were quite my hobby!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Then off they whirled; and as I was left alone, I thought I might as well be up and doing.</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Oh, good gracious, why didn't I sit still? but how could I tell what was brewing?</div>
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 391px;">
+<img src="images/i005.jpg" width="391" height="600" alt="BOBBY AND ROVER." title="" />
+<span class="caption">BOBBY AND ROVER.</span>
+</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[66]</a></span>So I went to the stable to see our big dog Rover, and thought I would take him out with me;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>When, just as I had slipped his chain, he broke loose, and ran, I don't know where! and, I'm sure, pa will never forgive me!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>For he thought so much of Rover. Oh, dear me, what shall I do?</div>
+<div class='hang1'>If it would be any use in the world, I really think I should begin to boohoo!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>The stable boy told me not to take him; but I should like to see myself minding him <i>rather;</i></div>
+<div class='hang1'>And of course, out of revenge, he'll just go and make the worst of it to father.</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Well, one would think that was enough; but when I came back to the house, oh jolly!</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[67]</a></span>There was our big cat just making a spring at sister Tilda's pretty polly!</div>
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;">
+<img src="images/i006.jpg" width="400" height="292" alt="The cat making a spring" title="" />
+</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And in my haste to save the bird I threw the poker at the cat and killed her!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And got myself in for a scolding from ma, and no great thanks from Tilda.</div>
+<div class='hang1'>It's six o'clock now; so, I suppose, they'll soon be home as cross as any Tartar,</div>
+<div class='hang1'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[68]</a></span>To give it to me for being such a bad boy, though I'm sure I'm a regular martyr;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>Don't you think so now, after all that I've just been telling?</div>
+<div class='hang1'>No breakfast, no geography, late at school, tore my trowsers, kept at home, lost the dog, killed the cat, and didn't know my spelling!</div>
+<div class='hang1'>I think the best thing I can do is to go to bed, put my head under the clothes,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And in a good, comfortable sleep try to forget all my sorrows and my woes;</div>
+<div class='hang1'>But you may be sure, after this, I shall not neglect to take warning,</div>
+<div class='hang1'>And begin to-morrow all right, without any sort of fail, by getting up early in the morning!</div>
+
+
+<p>"There!" said I, when I had finished,
+and it quite wore my tongue<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[69]</a></span>
+thin to repeat such a long piece of
+poetry. "What do you think of <i>that</i>
+for a story?"</p>
+
+<p>"I think it is real funny," said Nelly,
+laughing; "I wish I knew something
+to tell."</p>
+
+<p>"I can say a funny piece!" shouted
+Jimmy.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, say it, then," we two&mdash;Nelly
+and I&mdash;put in.</p>
+
+<p>Up he jumped right off, struck a
+funny attitude, and began:</p>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"The boy stood on the burning deck,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Peeling potatoes by the peck!</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">The flames rolled on and scorched his shins,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">As he stood peeling potato skins!</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">'Oh pa'!' he cried, 'the flames is hot,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Come, put the potatoes in the pot!'</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">But his father, alas! ne'er came to sup,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">So the flames rolled on and frizzled him up!"</span><br />
+</div>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[70]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"Did you ever hear anything so
+ridiculous as that?" cried Nelly.
+"Poor Casabianca! I used to cry
+over him dreadfully; but I shall never
+think of him now without laughing.
+Where did you learn that, Jimmy?"</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, Harry Agnew told it to me;
+he said he repeated it one day in
+school, when the master asked him
+if he could say a piece of poetry, and
+everybody burst out laughing. The
+master laughed too; so he couldn't
+put anybody down for a bad mark,
+though Harry was afraid he would."</p>
+
+<p>"That was almost equal to the
+trick we played at school," said I.
+"We wanted the doctor to give us a
+holiday, but he didn't seem to see it;
+so when we were called up for our<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[71]</a></span>
+reading after recess, we were told to
+read Montgomery's poem called 'Questions
+to Birds and their Answers.' One
+of the verses is about the swallow, and
+reads thus:</p>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"'Swallow, why homeward turned thy joyful wing?'<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">'In a far land I heard the voice of spring;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">I found myself that moment on the way,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">My wings, my wings, they had not power to stay.'</span><br />
+</div>
+
+<div class='unindent'>&mdash;but we changed it as though the
+doctor was asking us a question and
+we were answering&mdash;this way:</div>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"'Boys! why are you forever on the wing,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Wanting a holiday for everything?'</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">'From you we are so glad to get away,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Our legs, our legs, they will not let us stay.'"</span><br />
+</div>
+
+<p>How we all laughed over this; it
+was real true, too; and pretty soon<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[72]</a></span>
+after, as it was getting dark, I bid
+them good-by and ran home.</p>
+
+<p>Next morning, what should Aunt
+Elsie and Aunt Ruth (Aunt Priscilla
+was away on a visit) take into their
+heads, but that they hadn't had any
+fun house-cleaning&mdash;(I suppose they
+must think it's fun, or they wouldn't
+do it so often)&mdash;for ever so long; so
+nothing would suit them but to set the
+whole house in an uproar as quick as
+possible. Of course, I was in the way,
+whether I stayed in the garret or the
+kitchen; knocked down three pails
+and a scrubbing brush every time I
+went down stairs, nearly drowned
+Poddles in hot soapsuds, splashed myself
+all over with whitewash trying to
+"do" the kitchen ceiling (on my own<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[73]</a></span>
+account, when nobody was by), until
+I looked as if I had been out in a
+snowstorm, and watering the windows
+outside with the long hosepipe, until
+every one of them was dripping <i>inside</i>
+like a waterfall.</p>
+
+<p>Now, Neighbor Nelly and Jimmy
+had been looking out of their parlor
+window, and advising me which were
+the best parts of our windows to play
+on, when, all of a sudden, Nelly
+said:</p>
+
+<p>"Why, Tom, it doesn't half clean
+the panes to do them that way; they
+ought to be washed with soap and hot
+water. Suppose we try it? Only
+think!" she went on, "how much
+your aunties would be obliged to us
+if we were to find out a new way to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[74]</a></span>
+make windows clean, ever so much
+better than the old one!"</p>
+
+<p>"Splendid!" said I and Jimmy
+together. "Come, let's try it right
+away!"</p>
+
+<p>With that, Nelly and Jimmy came
+into our house, and into the front
+basement; Aunt Elsie and Aunt Ruth
+were both up stairs; so we had the
+two lower stories all to ourselves.</p>
+
+<p>As Nelly was afraid of spoiling her
+frock, I dived into the cook's dresser
+drawer, where she keeps her own table
+covers and clean dish cloths, and
+fished out a great big brown roller-towel,
+which we pinned round her
+neck, making her look in front as if
+she was tied up in a potato sack, with
+only her head left out. Then Jimmy<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[75]</a></span>
+and I took off our nice jackets, rolled
+up our shirt sleeves, lugged in three
+big yellow dishes full of hot water,
+spilling plenty on the way, found a
+long bar of brown soap, and helped
+ourselves to three more of Bridget's
+clean towels; and then we all three
+began scrubbing away at the windows!</p>
+
+<p>Such fun as we had! We put on
+the greatest lot of soap, and paid
+away with both hands, so as to make
+them good and <i>clean</i>, laughing and
+talking all the time; and when we
+thought the water had been used
+enough, or, rather when it was nearly
+all spilt, we took up our yellow bowls
+and marched into the kitchen for
+more.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[76]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>Our boiler, you must know, is a tin
+affair, like a large soup kettle without
+the handle, and has a faucet in front
+to draw the water off. We put it on
+the middle of the range, and keep it
+always full and boiling; and now, instead
+of filling our dishes right away,
+we began playing the kitchen was a
+steamboat, and the water heater the
+boiler, just ready to burst; so, of
+course, it was necessary to let off
+steam, which we did by drawing a
+little water at a time from the faucet
+into one of our yellow dishes, and tilting
+it back again as soon as the dish
+was full, beside "tooting," as loud as
+we could, to represent the commotion
+going on to perfection. We were soon
+so busy over this, that we forgot all<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[77]</a></span>
+about the front basement windows for
+ever so long, until we heard Aunt Elsie
+calling out, "Tom! Tom! where
+are you?"</p>
+
+<p>"Here I am, Aunt Elsie! come
+right along! Here we all are, washing
+the windows for you as nice as
+anything!"</p>
+
+<p>Down marched Aunt Elsie, short
+order; and the minute she came into
+the basement we heard her give an
+"O&mdash;&mdash;h!" about a quarter of a mile
+long. We all rushed to ask what was
+the matter; and such a pickle as the
+windows were in you never did
+see. The soap was in streaks, and
+smears, and lumps all over the panes,
+making them look as if somebody had
+spilt a lot of hasty pudding on them,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[78]</a></span>
+and it had stuck fast. Of course, as
+we left them so long, the soap had
+hardened on; and poor Nelly, frightened
+half out of her wits, began to
+cry. That put me up, I can tell you;
+I was determined Aunt Elsie shouldn't
+scold her; so I begged her not to be
+angry with anybody but me, for it
+wasn't their fault at all.</p>
+
+<p>"And I must say you are old
+enough to know better, Tom," said
+my aunt, looking at me reproachfully
+over the tops of her spectacles; "and
+as a punishment, you must get all the
+soap off the window before you have
+any dinner. The children had better
+go home."</p>
+
+<p>But now, what do you think that
+darling of a Nelly, and Jimmy did?<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[79]</a></span>
+They declared I shouldn't do it all
+alone by myself, but they would stay
+and help me; so, after Aunt Elsie had
+been coaxed to let us, we filled our
+dishes again, and went to work as
+busy as bees. It was pretty hard
+work getting the soap off, but we made
+a joke of it, and by the time the windows
+were fairly polished up, as bright
+as new pins, we were in a perfect frolic.
+I expect Nelly's bright eyes had
+something to do with it, for Aunt Elsie,
+after we had finished, and come
+shouting to her with our faces as red
+as fire, and considerable brown soap
+on us in spots, said, "we were famous
+workpeople," and gave us New Year's
+cookies, and almonds, and raisins for
+lunch. I had a Philop&oelig;na among my<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[80]</a></span>
+nuts, which I ate with Nelly; and
+pretty soon after they went home.</p>
+
+<p>I did hope she would catch me on
+the Philop&oelig;na, because I had something
+that I meant to give her all
+along; and this would be a famous
+chance. It was a nest of little boxes,
+made of plaid papier-mach&eacute;, about a
+dozen, one inside the other; and when
+you came to the very last, and had
+opened that, there was a gold thimble
+and scissors, and a little gold bodkin,
+a needlecase full of tiny needles, and a
+puncher, just big enough for the queen
+of the fairies; I won it at a raffle on
+Christmas Eve, and kept it to give to
+some little girl, for, of course, it wasn't
+any use to me; what could I do with
+a thimble and needles? Sure enough,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[81]</a></span>
+when I looked out of the back parlor
+window next morning, Neighbor Nelly
+looked out of <i>her</i> window, said with a
+saucy smile, "Good morning, Mr. Tom&mdash;Philop&oelig;na!"
+and popped back again.</p>
+
+<p>"Good!" I said. So, after breakfast,
+I asked Aunt Elsie for a nice
+sheet of paper and a new pen, and
+then I ran up to my own room, and
+sat down to write a little note to my
+neighbor. I'm sure, that showed how
+much I liked her, if anything could,
+for I'd rather do a sum in compound
+fractions, or a French exercise, than
+write a note. It quite gives me the
+toothache; but at last I wrote something
+very pretty, as, I'm sure, you
+will say when I repeat it to you. This
+is what I said:<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[82]</a></span></p>
+
+<div class="blockquot">"<span class="smcap">My dear Miss Nelly</span>:
+
+<p>"I hope you will accept the little
+present I send you for a Philop&oelig;na,
+because I like you very much. I am
+real glad you caught me, for perhaps
+this will remind you of me when I go
+back to school. I hope the needles will
+sew all the holes in your clothes, that
+the thimble will keep you from pricking
+your pretty little finger, and that</p>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"If you loves I as I loves you,<br />
+The scissors won't cut our love in two.<br />
+</div>
+
+<p>"Good-by.</p>
+
+<p>"From your affectionate friend</p>
+
+<div class='sig'>
+"<span class="smcap">Tom.</span>"<br />
+</div>
+</div>
+
+<p>Then I packed up the boxes and
+the letter in nice white paper, and
+coaxed Mary to take it in right away;<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[83]</a></span>
+and you can't tell how many pretty,
+smiling thanks I had in return.</p>
+
+<p>But you think I am making my
+story too long, Neighbor Oldbird?
+Well, perhaps I am, but there seems
+to be so much to tell about Nelly, and
+the nice times we had together, that I
+don't know when to stop. I am 'most
+through now.</p>
+
+<p>The day I sent her the Philop&oelig;na
+present was the last of my stay in
+town; and after I had packed up my
+clothes ready to start (with a gorgeous
+plum cake and two jars of raspberry
+jam in a box, which my dear
+old Friskies gave me,&mdash;they always do
+make everything of me, in spite of
+their lectures), I went to Uncle Herbert's
+room to bid him good-by, for I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[84]</a></span>
+knew I should not see him again before
+I started, and he made me the
+best present of all. It was a dear little
+watch and chain; for he said, as
+I was nearly fifteen, I was quite old
+enough to take care of one. Wasn't
+that kind of him?</p>
+
+<p>Well, dear me, I don't want to say
+good-by a bit, and I did not then;
+but, of course, it had to come, and I
+shook hands with my dear little
+friends, only wishing to goodness that
+I lived in New York.</p>
+
+<p>We promised about twenty-five
+times apiece always to be friends; and
+then I kissed Aunt Elsie and Aunt
+Ruth, pulled Poddles' ears for good-by,
+and pranced off all alone; of
+course, boys that have watches are<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[85]</a></span>
+plenty big enough to go from New
+York to White Plains by themselves.
+I suppose we always shall stay there,
+for papa is abominably fond of the
+country; but just wait until I am a
+man, and see if I don't come to live in
+New York, and marry Neighbor Nelly,
+if she will have me. Mind you keep
+that last remark a secret, now, Neighbor
+Oldbird! That's all there is
+about it.</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[86]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE FAT GENTLEMAN'S STORY.</h2>
+
+
+<div class='poem'>
+<span class="smcap">I'm</span> in love with Neighbor Nelly,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Though I know she's only ten;</span><br />
+While I am five and forty,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the <i>married-est</i> of men.</span><br />
+I've a wife as fat as butter,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And a baby&mdash;such a boy!</span><br />
+With the plumpest cheeks and shoulders,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Who's his father's dearest joy.</span><br />
+<br />
+Though a Square toes and a Buffer,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Still I've sunshine in my heart;</span><br />
+Still I'm <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'found'">fond</ins> of tops and marbles<br />
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[87]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Can appreciate a tart.</span><br />
+I can love my Neighbor Nelly,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Just as though I were a boy,</span><br />
+And would hand her cakes and apples,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From my depths of corduroy.</span><br />
+<br />
+She is tall, and growing taller;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">She is vigorous of limb;</span><br />
+(You should see her playing soldiers<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With her little brother Jim!)</span><br />
+She has eyes as blue as damsons;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">She has pounds of auburn curls;</span><br />
+She regrets the game of leapfrog<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is prohibited to girls.</span><br />
+<br />
+I adore my Neighbor Nelly,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I invite her in to tea,</span><br />
+And I let her nurse the baby<br />
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[88]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Her delightful ways to see.</span><br />
+Such a darling bud of woman!<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Yet remote from any teens;</span><br />
+I have learnt from Neighbor Nelly<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">What the girls' doll instinct means.</span><br />
+<br />
+Oh! to see her with the baby!<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(He adores her more than I);</span><br />
+How she choruses his crowing,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">How she hushes every cry!</span><br />
+How she loves to pit his dimples<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With her light forefinger deep;</span><br />
+How she boasts, as one in triumph,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When she gets him off to sleep!</span><br />
+<br />
+We must part, my Neighbor Nelly,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For the summers quickly flee;</span><br />
+And the middle-aged admirer<br />
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[89]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Must, too soon, supplanted be.</span><br />
+Yet, as jealous as a mother,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A suspicious, cankered churl,</span><br />
+I look vainly for the setting,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To be worthy such a pearl!</span><br />
+</div>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p><span class="smcap">Note.</span>&mdash;This charming little gem is not original, being
+gleaned from the pages of Putnam's Magazine. As
+it was there published anonymously, the author is unable
+to make any further acknowledgment.</p></div>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[90]</a></span></p>
+<h2>POSTSCRIPT TO THE THREE STORIES.</h2>
+
+<h3>BY THE OLD BACHELOR.</h3>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> I had finished copying out
+the stories of the Big Boy and the Fat
+Gentleman last summer, the thought
+struck me that, as I had been in town
+all the warm bright June weather, it
+would do my health a great deal of
+good to take a trip to Long Branch.
+Of course, it was not to see Neighbor
+Nelly&mdash;certainly not.</p>
+
+<p>So, the very next Saturday afternoon
+I dusted up my valise, and put
+some nice cool summer clothes in it,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[91]</a></span>
+and a great paper of candy, which I
+meant for my little neighbors, in case
+I should see them by accident! Somebody
+had told me that the Mansion
+House was the best hotel to stop at.
+Shall I tell you why? Because there
+was a party there, of a papa and
+mamma, a dear little girl and boy,
+and a remarkably nice little toy terrier,
+which would put me in mind very
+much of some friends of mine called
+Lawson. In fact, this family was
+called Lawson, too, and the younger
+members were christened Nelly and
+Jimmy! Comical, wasn't it?</p>
+
+<p>If you have never been to Long
+Branch, you can't think what a pleasant
+sail it is down the Bay in the
+"Thomas Collyer," and how much I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[92]</a></span>
+enjoyed my trip. The pleasant shores
+of Long and Staten Islands (<i>I</i> used to
+live on Staten Island, and had some
+comical times there, which I mean to
+write out one of these days) looked
+as verdant and beautiful as ever; the
+sea was as blue as a bluebottle fly,
+and the sun as light as a cork! As I
+looked at the great, rolling waves, I
+laughed to myself, thinking what nice
+times we were going to have in bathing;
+ducking under them, when they
+came roaring along the shore after us,
+as if they meant to gobble us up, and
+bouncing out again when they had
+passed, all dripping and laughing, and
+ready for the next one to play the
+same trick on us. Sometimes, to be
+sure, the waves play too rough, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[93]</a></span>
+knock you off your feet without "by
+your leave;" or a little crab will walk
+up and bite your toes, just by way of
+welcoming you to Long Branch; but
+nobody minds it. Bless you!&mdash;that
+only makes it more fun to go in
+bathing!</p>
+
+<p>Well, the boat stopped at the pier,
+which extends a quarter of a mile from
+the shore, putting one in mind of a
+long crab's claw stuck out for "shake
+hands" by old Neptune; and I jumped
+into the cars and was bounced and
+rattled along to Long Branch. As it
+was Saturday afternoon, a great crowd
+of people were going there with me,
+and, deary me! when <i>I</i> came to the
+Mansion House, there wasn't any room
+left for me! Wasn't it too bad? Just<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[94]</a></span>
+when I had fixed to have such a nice
+time with my dear little friends! It
+would never do to go away, however,
+so I said: "Well, never mind, Mr.
+Mansion House&mdash;that is, Mr. Neighbor
+Nelly&mdash;dear me!&mdash;Mr. Laird, I
+can do without a room; and at night
+you can put me to sleep in the pigeon
+house, or the hen coop, or under the
+counter of the office, or up the chimney,
+I don't care which; but go away
+I can't!"</p>
+
+<p>Now, I expect, Mr. Laird must
+have known I had come to see Neighbor
+Nelly, and what a disappointment
+it would be not to get in; for after a
+consultation with his bookkeeper, he
+told me he could give me a room after
+all! and I was so glad, that I offered<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[95]</a></span>
+him my snuff box immediately, which
+is a favor I only grant to very nice
+people!</p>
+
+<p>So up stairs I hurried, to get ready
+for tea, in high good humor, and,
+would you believe it, when I came
+down again, whose table should I be
+put to sit at, but Neighbor Nelly's?
+Oh, how surprised and pleased she was
+to see me! and Jimmy and his father
+and mother were just as glad. There
+was famous "clam chowder" for tea,
+and such great big blackberries, that
+we really had to make two bites of
+them! not to mention the quantities
+of other good things; and after tea
+we strolled out on the bluff, which
+overlooks the ocean. There are three
+pretty little summer houses before the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[96]</a></span>
+Mansion House, and in one of these
+we took our seats. Gipsey had come
+scampering up to me in delighted recognition
+as we left the dining room,
+barking and wagging his tail, until I
+should think both his tail and his bark
+would have been quite out of joint.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, Neighbor Oldbird, I'm so glad
+you have come," began Nelly, eagerly;
+"we have been having such fun,
+and, now you are here, it will be nicer
+than ever."</p>
+
+<p>"Do you and Jimmy go in bathing?"
+I asked.</p>
+
+<p>"I guess we do!" cried Jimmy.
+"We rush into the water first of anybody,
+and go out real deep, when we
+have hold of the ropes. Some great
+big boys are as afraid as anything!<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[97]</a></span>
+But we like to have the waves go
+over our heads."</p>
+
+<p>"Talking about big boys," said I,
+looking wonderfully sly, "I made the
+acquaintance of a big boy in our
+street, not long ago, who knows a
+certain little lady very well; and likes
+her very well, too!"</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, I know!" chimed both the
+children; "it's Tom Halstead. Isn't
+it?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yes; he told me something funny
+about you, too; I did not know you
+could wash windows before, Neighbor
+Nelly."</p>
+
+<p>My little neighbor laughed and
+blushed comically when I said that,
+and then Jimmy said:</p>
+
+<p>"He's a first rate fellow, I tell you.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[98]</a></span>
+He sent us a letter the other day, and
+what do you think? he's coming
+here!"</p>
+
+<p>"Coming here!" I exclaimed;
+"my stars! I shall be quite thrown in
+the shade when such a nice friend
+makes his appearance. I think I shall
+have to go home again Monday, and
+I did mean to stay till Wednesday,"
+and I made up a dismal face, and pretended
+to be quite heart-broken.</p>
+
+<p>"No, indeed, Neighbor Oldbird!
+we shall always like you the best!"
+cried Nelly, catching both my hands
+in hers. "He is a very nice boy, to be
+sure, but we like <i>you</i> just as much as
+if you were our bachelor uncle."</p>
+
+<p>"Then I move to be called Uncle
+Josiah directly!" I said, laughing;<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[99]</a></span>
+"so, my dear niece and nephew, don't
+you think it would be a good plan for
+us to go down on that nice yellow
+sand there, and look at the waves?"</p>
+
+<p>The children were delighted with
+this plan, so we all three walked to
+the steep wooden steps that lead from
+the bluff to the beach below, and were
+soon on the sands. Gipsey came racing
+after as usual, and in his haste to
+join us, ran so fast down the steps,
+that he couldn't stop himself, but had
+to bring up on the sand past the
+water mark, looking comically astonished.
+To put a finishing touch to his
+misfortunes, a great big wave came
+tumbling in just then, and over poor
+Gipsey it went! sousing him head and
+ears! It frightened him so much that<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[100]</a></span>
+he rushed dripping wet to Neighbor
+Nelly, and jumped into her lap, squealing
+dismally. Such a perfect shower-bath
+of cold salt water as rained all
+over her pretty muslin dress, and trim
+little gaiters and stockings! We had
+to shake her well, and put Gipsey to
+bed on a sandhill near us, where he
+went to sleep, and, I hope, forgot his
+miseries.</p>
+
+<p>Perhaps you don't know it, but the
+sand is a famous place to write your
+name. You go as near the retreating
+wave as you dare, and then, with a
+walking stick or an umbrella, or your
+finger, if nothing better is to be had,
+write your name, or draw a hideous
+spook on the wet sand. You have to
+be quick about it, too; for just as you<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[101]</a></span>
+are putting the finishing touches to
+the work, another great billow is sure
+to come tearing at you, with a wide,
+deep hollow of emerald green, and
+foaming crest, looking like molten silver
+in the moonlight. Crash! it falls
+on the beach; and a long rush of foam
+slides up the sand as you scamper out
+of reach, not always without a wet
+shoe or two. Now the water has all
+run back, but where is the writing?
+The sand is smooth once more, and
+ready, like a great blackboard, to be
+marked on anew. So the sea is always
+clearing your writing book for
+you, and giving you a chance to begin
+again and see how long it will last!</p>
+
+<p>I should think we wrote "Nelly,"
+"Jimmy," and "Neighbor Oldbird,"<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[102]</a></span>
+about fifty times each on the sand,
+with my walking stick; and then we
+"hung Jeff. Davis on a sour apple
+tree," and depicted him with Old
+Spookey coming after him, and told
+the Atlantic Ocean, "We like blue
+fish," and "We're going in bathing
+Monday," and never succeeded in
+keeping one of our achievements
+more than half a minute.</p>
+
+<p>We stayed down on the delightful
+beach until nearly half-past nine; and,
+dear me, what a heap of sand we got
+in our shoes! It was quite wonderful
+how it contrived to work its way in;
+but there it was, making us lift up
+our feet as heavily as though we had
+cannon balls tied to our ankles.</p>
+
+<p>But it was getting late, and high<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[103]</a></span>
+time for small people to be off to
+bed; so, with a shake of the hand
+from one of my little neighbors, and a
+"good kiss" from the other, I don't
+say <i>which</i>, Gipsey was waked up, and
+they all trotted off together.</p>
+
+<p>Next morning was Sunday, and a
+beautiful sunshiny day. The first
+thing I did when I woke up, was to
+pop my head out of the window and
+take a look at the ocean. There it
+was, as beautiful as ever, and now I
+found out a funny thing about Long
+Branch that I hadn't noticed the
+evening before. "Why," said I, "is it
+possible I am in the country? Where
+are the trees?" They were nowhere
+to be seen, not so much as a bush;
+while the flowers were represented<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[104]</a></span>
+by everybody's bathing dresses hanging
+over all the fences, and on ever
+so many clothes-lines besides, to dry.
+The fact is, that the Atlantic Ocean is
+determined to let nothing be admired
+but itself; so it will not permit a tree
+to grow any nearer its shores than
+half a mile. So all the foliage there
+consists of the direful old bathing
+dresses, flapping in the wind and looking
+like so many scarecrows put up
+to frighten off the fishhawks.</p>
+
+<p>In the morning we went to the
+cunning little Episcopal church, and
+listened to the earnest teachings of
+the noble young rector, who is working
+so bravely in his Master's cause
+with such poor earthly reward. That
+he is laying up treasure where "neither<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[105]</a></span>
+moth nor rust doth corrupt," we cannot
+but believe. We did not like to
+leave the quiet little church for the
+great noisy hotels, in one of which, as
+we passed it, they were <i>playing billiards</i>.
+Oh! what an occupation for
+God's holy day! I cannot believe they
+were Christians who were playing, but
+I know I wanted to go and beg them
+to stop.</p>
+
+<p>In the afternoon it clouded up, and
+began to rain very hard; so we could
+not go to church, and as it was very
+little like Sunday in the crowded hall
+and parlor, Mrs. Lawson proposed we
+should all come and sit in her room,
+which opened on one of the upper
+piazzas. So we established ourselves
+here, where it was quiet and cool,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[106]</a></span>
+very glad to escape from the bustle
+down stairs.</p>
+
+<p>"Suppose you were to repeat that
+pretty German hymn I gave you the
+other day," said her mother to Nelly.
+"Perhaps Mr. Oldbird would like to
+hear it."</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, that I should," I said; so
+Nelly began the beautiful verses
+called&mdash;</p>
+
+
+<div class='center'>"ALL THERE."</div>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"Nothing is lost; the treasures which the ocean<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">Hath taken to itself in ages fled,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">The lives that rest beneath its ceaseless motion</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">Until 'the sea shall render up its dead:'</span><br />
+<br />
+"The dew drops that the warm bright sunshine drieth,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">The cloud that melts away in summer air,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">The bud that lifteth its sweet head&mdash;and dieth,</span><br />
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[107]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">They are not lost&mdash;God keeps them in his care.</span><br />
+<br />
+"Nothing is lost; the anguish of the mourner,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And bitter tears that fall like solemn rain,</span><br />
+Are safely stored within the heavenly garner,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Till Christ shall come unto his own again.</span><br />
+<br />
+"And our beloved ones that Death doth gather<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">To their calm, dreamless sleep beneath the tomb,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Like tender flowers, are cherished by the Father</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">In the celestial fields of Heaven to bloom.</span><br />
+<br />
+"Nothing is lost; oh, let the promise cheer us;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">By God himself to weary mortals given;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Our darling ones shall soon again be near us,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">Our hopes shall bloom, unfadingly, in Heaven."</span><br />
+</div>
+
+<p>"I think that is the best hymn I
+know," added Nelly, when she had
+finished. "Now, what shall we do?"</p>
+
+<p>"Let's play church!" suggested
+Jimmy.</p>
+
+<p>"Oh yes! that's the very thing!"
+said Nelly. "Suppose we ask Kitty
+and Robby Morris to come in."<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[108]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>So Kitty and Robby were found,
+and consented to join the play, which
+straightway began; mamma and I
+looking on, though we made believe
+not to be taking notice, for fear of
+disturbing the little visitors.</p>
+
+<p>Robby, who was a dear little fellow,
+only five years old, with long
+golden curls and great blue eyes, was
+the minister, at his own special request.
+The children dressed him in a
+long white sack of Mrs. Lawson's by
+way of a gown, and gave him a small
+table for a pulpit. The others, with
+Gipsey, and a large gray cat, the
+property of Robby and Kitty, which
+marched in after them, were the congregation,
+sitting on the edge of the
+bed, to be like the long church pew.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[109]</a></span>
+The minister took for his text, "Little
+children, love one another," and his sermon
+was such a dear, funny little discourse,
+that I must write it down for you.</p>
+
+<p>"Now, my dear peoples," he said,
+"I hope, whenever you feel like karrelling,<a name="FNanchor_A_1" id="FNanchor_A_1"></a><a href="#Footnote_A_1" class="fnanchor">[A]</a>
+or being as cross as bears,
+you will 'member what the Bible says
+'bout loving one another. Gipsey
+fighted my tat to-day, and pulled
+some of her fur out; but he's only a
+dog, and I readed in my Dr. Watts&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"Let dogs delight to bark and bite,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">For God has made 'em so;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Let bears and lions growl and fight,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">For 'tis their nature too.</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">But, children, <i>you</i> s'ould <i>never</i> let</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">Your angry <i>pass'ons</i> rise!</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 0.5em;">Your little hands were <i>never</i> made</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">To sc'atch each other's eyes."</span><br />
+</div>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[110]</a></span></p>
+
+<div class='unindent'>&mdash;&mdash;so I was not mad at him, 'cause
+he didn't <i>know</i> he ought to love
+pussy.</div>
+
+<p>"I <i>s'apped</i> nurse the other day,
+'cause she made me come out of the
+water before I wanted to, and <i>that</i>
+was <i>very</i> naughty; I begged her pardon,
+though, and gave her a piece of
+my <i>tandy</i>, that papa had brought me.
+Now, my dear peoples, I think that is
+long enough. S'pose we sing, 'I want
+to be an angel.'"</p>
+
+<div class="figleft" style="width: 364px;">
+<img src="images/i007.jpg" width="364" height="600" alt="PLAYING CHURCH." title="" />
+<span class="caption">PLAYING CHURCH.</span>
+</div>
+
+<p>Wasn't that a cunning little sermon?
+It put me in mind of how I
+used to play church in my childhood,
+long ago; when my young brother,
+dear little Davy, would stand on a
+chair, while I sat on my stool at his
+feet, and preach a sermon something<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[111]</a></span>
+like Robby's. Darling Davy! I fancied
+I could see his sweet face and
+earnest eyes looking down at me,
+from his happy home in heaven that
+Sunday afternoon; for he closed those
+dark eyes on this weary earth many
+long years since, and I never think
+of him now but as standing on the
+chair in our father's study (with, perhaps,
+mother looking in, unknown to
+him), and preaching from some simple
+text that we knew and loved, in
+quaint, yet childish words. Ah, well!
+perhaps it was better so, than that he
+should have lived to be a gray-headed
+old bachelor like "brother Jose!"</p>
+
+<p>So the children all sang the hymn,
+and that was the end of church. We
+passed the rest of the afternoon telling<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[112]</a></span>
+Bible stories, and repeating hymns,
+and after tea it was clear once more,
+and dry enough to go out on the bluff.</p>
+
+<p>You may be sure, we were all in
+famous spirits Monday morning, and
+ready for any sort of a frolic. Who
+could help being good humored with
+such company as my little neighbors?
+Mr. Lawson left us in the first train
+for the city; but, to make up, who
+should have come down in the early
+morning boat, but Tom Halstead and
+Miss Elsie Bluejay&mdash;or Brandlaw, I
+ought to say, since I know her name
+now; and they drove straight up to
+the Mansion House, of course&mdash;who
+wouldn't, when Neighbor Nelly was
+there? The children received Tom
+with shouts of joy; and he looked so<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[113]</a></span>
+handsome and happy, and his great
+black eyes sparkled so with good humor
+and fun, that I felt quite ready to
+admit him into my circle of little people
+that I knew and loved. Neighbor
+Nelly and he were an admirable contrast
+in point of appearance, and I
+shouldn't be surprised if the last remark
+made to me in strict confidence,
+by my friend Tom in his account of
+her, should come true some day.</p>
+
+<p>I wish I could sketch a little picture
+of our party as we clustered together
+on the piazza, to show what
+manner of people we were then; and
+another, of our appearance in the
+water afterward. Ten o'clock was the
+hour for bathing that morning; so
+we each armed ourselves with our<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[114]</a></span>
+bathing clothes and a prodigious
+towel, like the main sail of a fishing
+smack, and rushed down to the beach;
+that is, the younger members; Aunt
+Elsie, Mrs. Lawson, and I walked soberly
+along. Then we popped into
+separate bathing houses, still looking
+like respectable and responsible
+members of society, and popped out
+five minutes afterward&mdash;scarecrows!
+spooks! animated rag-bags! with the
+last vestige of our gentility and good
+looks departed.</p>
+
+<p>Aunt Elsie had taken leave of a
+most beautiful brown "front" and
+fourteen luxuriant curls, the absence
+of which gave her an appearance very
+like a staid bald-headed owl; particularly
+as she would keep on her very<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[115]</a></span>
+round spectacles, and wore a pair of
+extremely long-fingered green cotton
+gloves. The long ends of the glove
+fingers, waving about in the water,
+were not unlike the owl's claws;
+while her gray woollen bathing dress
+might have passed for a new sort of
+flannel feathers. A mortified blue sunbonnet,
+with all the canes out, was
+perched lop-sided on her head, and
+she wore a pair of bathing shoes, like
+brown poultices. The rest of us were
+just as bad, though; I was an ogre in
+green flannel, Tom and Jimmy monkeys
+in red, Mrs. Lawson tolerably
+lady-like in blue, with white tape
+trimmings, and Neighbor Nelly a
+ridiculous little old jumping Jenny in
+white, with gorgeous red facings; and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_116" id="Page_116">[116]</a></span>
+all in hats that defied our best friends
+to know us in.</p>
+
+<p>How we laughed at each other,
+and then made haste over the sand,
+which was so hot that it nearly
+scorched our feet, and plumped into
+the nice cool ocean, where ever so
+many other frights were already hopping
+about.</p>
+
+<p>Now for a rush into the deep water!
+here comes a big wave! down,
+down now! and over our heads it
+went! dousing us as it had Gipsey
+the Saturday night, only we didn't
+squeal.</p>
+
+<p>Presently, some people who had
+come from the next hotel, began
+dancing the "Lancers" in the water,
+ducking under instead of bowing, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[117]</a></span>
+seeming to have such a good time,
+that nothing would suit the children
+but that they must begin dancing,
+too; in consequence of which a wave
+twice as high as usual came roaring
+up, and carried Neighbor Nelly right
+off her feet. Under the water she
+went, and for an instant we were
+quite frightened; but presently up she
+popped laughing, and trying to squeeze
+the salt water out of her eyes.</p>
+
+<p>However, that put a stop to the
+dancing; and here let me tell you,
+that surf bathing is always a pretty
+venturesome thing to attempt, unless
+you grasp the ropes firmly, or have
+hold of some older and stronger person's
+hand.</p>
+
+<p>There was one gentleman flourishing<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[118]</a></span>
+about near us, who seemed bent
+upon trying how many odd things he
+could do in the water. Presently we
+saw him going down head first, and
+then his feet coming up in the air like
+a duck's! It looked so comical to see
+any one besides a duck standing upside
+down in the water, that we all
+burst out laughing, and just then along
+came another billow, and treated us
+each to a mouthful of salt water!</p>
+
+<p>By this time we had been in long
+enough for one day, for you should
+always remember to come out before
+you feel chilled, and so we waded to
+the shore, looking more outlandish
+than ever, now the bathing dresses
+were all soaked, and hurried into the
+houses to get dry and dressed.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119">[119]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>Surf bathing is a famous thing to
+give you an appetite; and I don't
+wonder Mr. Laird provides so bountiful
+and well cooked a dinner, when
+I think of the famishing five hundred
+people that were to be fed the day I
+was there, and every day beside. The
+"Charge of the Light Brigade" was
+nothing to the charge we made upon
+the dishes; and as the dining room is
+sensibly arranged with tables accommodating
+about a dozen people each,
+we all sat together; and had such a
+merry time that two or three cross old
+dames looked sharply at our party,
+very curious to know what all the
+laughing was about. Our small friend
+Gipsey was the cause of it, partly, for
+he posted himself beside each of our<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[120]</a></span>
+chairs in turn, and made such surprising
+and despairing hops and skips after
+bits of chicken held up beyond his
+reach, that he very nearly turned a
+somerset each time.</p>
+
+<p>We rewarded his patience at last
+by giving him some bones, which he
+crunched under the table with perfect
+satisfaction, while we were discussing
+the ice cream and other good
+things.</p>
+
+<p>In the afternoon I was sitting
+reading the paper on the upper piazza,
+and the children were amusing themselves
+in their own fashion near me.
+Nelly, with another little girl, whose
+name seemed to be "Baby," for they
+never called her anything else, were
+manufacturing a resplendent doll's dress<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[121]</a></span>
+for a waxen angel in a white spencer&mdash;or
+whatever those muslin concerns are
+called, which the ladies wear with colored
+skirts nowadays, and a black velvet
+pointed belt; while the boys, with
+their arms fraternally entwined, were
+interchanging confidences on the important
+subjects of "My peg top,"
+"Don't you think thirty-eight cents is
+a tremendous price for kites?" "How
+many glass agates have you got?"
+and so on&mdash;when Tom, looking very
+mischievous, suddenly lifted up dolly
+by the toe of her shoe, and asked,
+"Why, Nelly, what's the matter with
+this doll; has she got the spinal complaint?"</p>
+
+<p>"No, you goose," said Nelly, laughing.
+"What makes you ask that?"<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[122]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"Because she has on a supporter,"
+said Tom, with perfect gravity, pointing
+to the velvet belt. "Poor thing!
+why don't you take her in bathing?
+It would do her health good, I'm
+sure; she looks fearfully pale."</p>
+
+<p>"Ah, make him put her down,
+Nelly," said Baby; "he'll break her
+if he goes on so;" for Tom was now
+amusing himself by balancing dolly on
+her head in his hand, making a great
+display of embroidered trowsers and
+hoop petticoats; and now, catching
+her by both hands, he suddenly swung
+her over the railing. "This is the way
+she ought to be ducked under the
+waves!" he added. Nelly sprang forward
+at the same moment with an
+"Oh, Tom! please!" and caught his<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123">[123]</a></span>
+arm rather suddenly. His hold relaxed
+at the same moment, and crash!
+down tumbled poor dolly on the
+ground below, breaking one of her
+wax arms completely off, and making
+a fearful cavity in her forehead, which
+killed her completely! that is, I should
+think so. I never heard of any one
+who survived fracture of the skull.
+Did you?</p>
+
+<p>Poor Nelly! She tried hard not
+to mind it; but dolly's head was one
+too many for her, and the tears came
+rolling quickly down her cheeks as she
+gazed at the unfortunate waxen damsel
+below, with quivering lip. Tom
+turned red and white alternately in
+silence for a moment, and then began
+pouring forth apologies and regrets.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[124]</a></span>
+He called himself all the imps that
+ever were heard of for being so careless;
+he offered to go to New York
+that very day to buy another doll,
+and have his hair well pulled beside,
+if she only would forgive him, and say
+she didn't think he had done it on
+purpose; and, in short, we had quite
+a little scene; when, fortunately, there
+occurred to me a pleasant means of
+diverting the minds of the party from
+the accident that had happened. So I
+laid down my paper, as though I had
+not been listening, and said:</p>
+
+<p>"Well, little people, I believe I
+have discovered all the news there is;
+so what do you say to coming to a
+party I am thinking of giving in my
+room?"<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[125]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"A party!" cried the children,
+dropping the subject of the doll to
+look at me; "why, we should like
+that very much. What sort of a party
+is it?"</p>
+
+<p>"A reading party," I answered.
+"I have some papers I have been
+thinking of reading to you, to get
+your opinion of them before I put
+them in a book; and I shouldn't be
+surprised if there was a paper of candy
+in my drawer besides."</p>
+
+<p>"Why, do you write books?"
+asked Baby, opening her bright eyes
+very wide indeed, as if to be certain
+what a real live author looked like.</p>
+
+<p>"To be sure I do," I said, laughing.
+"Funny stories, and sad ones,
+too; and some that are every word<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[126]</a></span>
+of them true, and others that are told
+me by my friends; and you shall tell
+me whether they are true or not."</p>
+
+<p>So we all made haste into my room&mdash;not
+the same I had when I first
+came, but one on the front piazza,
+near Neighbor Nelly's. The papers I
+meant were my own, Tom's, and the
+Fat Gentleman's stories, which I had
+brought down with me, to look over
+and correct. The candy I had bought
+for Nelly and Jimmy, as I told you,
+and forgotten all about to that moment.
+Little Robby came trotting
+along just then, so we asked him to be
+of the party; and Mrs. Lawson, looking
+out to see why we were in such a
+bustle, made up the <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'copmany'">company</ins>.</p>
+
+<p>I wish you could have been at Our<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[127]</a></span>
+Party that afternoon. We made a
+cosey little group, I assure you. Mrs.
+Lawson sat by the table with her sewing;
+Tom established himself close to
+my chair, and Nelly nestled by my
+other side. Baby and Jimmy sat on
+hassocks, contrived from carpet bags,
+at my feet; dear little Robby was lifted
+to my knee, and the reading began.
+Oh, the laughter, and comical wonder,
+and blushes, when my little neighbors
+found the stories were about them!
+Nelly burst out with "Oh, Neighbor
+Oldbird!" and hid her face on my
+shoulder every time there was some
+special praise of herself. Tom turned
+perfectly crimson when we came to
+his story, and was in and out of his
+seat twenty times, begging me to stop,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[128]</a></span>
+during its progress, his splendid black
+eyes glancing appealingly at me and
+Nelly by turns. I wouldn't spare him
+a single word, however; and when I
+came to his declaration at the end,
+concerning Nelly, there was a general
+shout of laughter.</p>
+
+<p>"There's an eligible offer for you,
+Miss Nell," I said solemnly. "You'd
+better take it into consideration!"
+and so on, until Mrs. Lawson begged
+me to stop. She did not like to have
+ideas about marriage put into the children's
+heads; and I, when I reflected,
+was very sorry I had been so thoughtless.
+Tom bore my teasing manfully;
+but Nelly's face was rather grave, as
+if she did not like such remarks to
+be made about her; so I hurried on<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129">[129]</a></span>
+to the Fat Gentleman's story, and
+brought up at the end, and then
+handed round the candy, amid general
+approbation.</p>
+
+<p>How we all passed that evening
+together on the beach, and had a
+wildly happy time; how we went in
+bathing the next day, and the next;
+and how, on Wednesday afternoon, I
+bid a most reluctant good-by to my
+little neighbors, I have not room to
+tell. I want to write how gladly we
+met again in the city in the fall; how
+Tom did come to live in New York,
+and favored us with his company as
+often as possible; how we chanced
+again on the little girl whom we had
+met in the toy shop, and found her
+living in a wretched tenement house<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[130]</a></span>
+in Cherry street, whence Mr. Lawson
+and I, with some other friends, removed
+them in haste, and established
+them in a nice little thread-needle
+store on one of the business avenues
+not far from our street; but all this
+would take too long.</p>
+
+<p>I must say, though, what a blessed
+change it has been for them, particularly
+for poor little crippled Clara,
+who never fails to greet us with a
+smile when we go there to see her, as
+she sits in her comfortable arm-chair
+by the window, with her pet spaniel
+"Dandy" beside her. She is always
+contented and cheerful, in spite of the
+sharp pain that often racks her slender
+limbs; and as I look on her pale
+face, which is so plainly not long for<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[131]</a></span>
+this earth, and think that now her
+suffering life will end amid comfort
+and peace, I whisper to myself with a
+heart full of love, "All this through
+thy sweet influence, dear</p>
+
+<div class='center'>
+"<span class="smcap">Neighbor Nelly!</span>"<br /><br /></div>
+
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTE:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_A_1" id="Footnote_A_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor_A_1"><span class="label">[A]</span></a> Quarrelling.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_132" id="Page_132">[132]</a></span></p>
+<h2>CONCLUSION.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">And</span> that was the end of the famous
+Sock Stories, which had afforded
+George and Helen so much amusement
+during nearly three months; for
+it took all that time for Aunt Fanny's
+daughter to write, and the children to
+read them all. They could not tell
+which they liked the best; for it so
+happened that the "Funny Little
+Socks" made their appearance just at
+the time when some dear little cousins
+of theirs, only four or five years old,
+had come to spend a week or two
+with them, which made baby stories<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[133]</a></span>
+doubly welcome; and I don't know
+what the good and delightful gentleman
+to whom the fifth book is dedicated
+will say about it, when he sees
+his name at the front; but it was
+thought very appropriate by Helen's
+papa; as the very best story in the
+book is all about philosophers, grave
+and gay.</p>
+
+<p>One thing in particular I am most
+happy to record; and that is, that
+the good habits which keeping mamma's
+little code of rules had engendered,
+were not broken off at the close
+of the readings; but instead, were
+formed more lastingly with every
+week; until now every one who
+knows George and Helen says, the first
+thing, "What good children they are!<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[134]</a></span>
+and yet, they never have to be
+whipped, or shut up in a dark closet
+to make them so." No! they are good
+from a higher motive than the dread
+of punishment; for they are inspired
+with the sincere desire to make their
+dear mother as happy as they can;
+and it would not surprise me at all if
+Santa Claus, who is a very discerning
+old gentleman, were to put something
+very nice indeed in both socks and
+stockings this Christmas&mdash;in spite of
+the hard times!</p>
+
+<p>And now, one last word, before
+Aunt Fanny's daughter bids you good-by,
+little reader. She hopes and prays,
+in all sincerity, that she has succeeded
+not only in amusing you, but in giving
+you some lessons which will sink into<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[135]</a></span>
+your hearts for your real good. And
+if in the shadowy train of personages
+who have moved before you in these
+Sock Stories, there is one who has
+pleased you especially, from Colonel
+Freddy and little tender-hearted Greta,
+to Little Mother and the Old
+Bachelor, Neighbor Nelly, with her
+bright eyes and merry ways, or Gipsey,
+of the cork-screw tail and yap!
+yap! bark, the knowledge of this fact
+will give <i>her</i> what she wishes for you
+all, a very</p>
+
+<div class='center'>
+<span class="smcap">Merry Christmas!</span><br />
+</div>
+
+
+<div class='center'><br /><br />
+THE END OF THE SIXTH AND LAST BOOK.<br />
+</div>
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<div class='tnote'><h3>Transcriber's Notes:</h3>
+<p>Obvious punctuation errors repaired.</p>
+<p>The remaining corrections made are indicated by dotted lines under the corrections. Scroll the mouse over the word and the original text will <ins title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'apprear'">appear</ins>.</p></div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Neighbor Nelly Socks, by Sarah L. Barrow
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+</body>
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Neighbor Nelly Socks, by Sarah L. Barrow
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Neighbor Nelly Socks
+       Being the Sixth and Last Book of the Series
+
+Author: Sarah L. Barrow
+
+Release Date: August 3, 2009 [EBook #29597]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NEIGHBOR NELLY SOCKS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Edwards, Emmy and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: OUR PARTY.]
+
+
+
+
+THE SOCK STORIES,
+
+BY "AUNT FANNY'S" DAUGHTER.
+
+NEIGHBOR NELLY SOCKS:
+
+BEING
+
+THE SIXTH AND LAST BOOK OF THE SERIES.
+
+BY
+
+"AUNT FANNY'S" DAUGHTER,
+
+THE AUTHOR OF "THE LITTLE WHITE ANGEL."
+
+          NEW YORK:
+          LEAVITT & ALLEN, 21 & 23 MERCER ST.
+          1863.
+
+  ENTERED, according to Act of Congress, in the year 1862, by
+  S. L. BARROW,
+
+  In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States
+      for the
+  Southern District of New York.
+
+
+          JOHN F. TROW,
+          PRINTER, STEREOTYPER, AND ELECTROTYPER,
+          50 Greene Street, New York.
+
+
+
+
+                            TO
+
+                      MY DEAR FATHER,
+
+          TO WHOSE KINDLY AND CHARMING WAYS WITH THE
+
+                      "LITTLE FOLK"
+
+          I OWE THE CHARACTER OF "NEIGHBOR OLDBIRD,"
+
+                        THIS BOOK
+
+                  IS LOVINGLY DEDICATED.
+
+
+
+
+CONTEXTS OF VOL. VI.
+
+                                            PAGE
+
+          NEIGHBOR NELLY. IN THREE STORIES.
+
+          1. THE OLD BACHELOR'S STORY,        7
+
+          2. THE BIG BOY'S STORY,            45
+
+          3. THE FAT GENTLEMAN'S STORY,      86
+
+          POSTSCRIPT BY THE OLD BACHELOR,    90
+
+          CONCLUSION,                       132
+
+
+
+
+NEIGHBOR NELLY.
+
+IN THREE STORIES.
+
+
+
+
+THE OLD BACHELOR'S STORY.
+
+
+IN the city block where I live, there are just twenty-four houses on the
+other side of the street, and twenty-four on this side, six lamp posts,
+and eight ailanthus trees in green boxes. Oh, dear me, what a tiresome
+row! That's what I thought when I first came to lodge here; for, as I am
+an old bachelor, I don't want a whole house to myself; but now, when I
+sit at my window and look out at the street, I find no end of things to
+amuse and interest me; particularly when the gas is lighted of an
+evening, and I can see a little way into the parlors of the opposite
+neighbors. I suppose they know that an old bachelor like Josiah Oldbird
+can do no harm by looking on at their evening amusements; so they do not
+pull the blinds down if they chance to see me, sitting lonely at my
+window, and willing to accept such crumbs of their society and happiness
+as I can glean over the way.
+
+First, then, is the family at No. 7, three maiden sisters and a bachelor
+brother. As I don't in the least know their names, I have dubbed them
+the Bluejays, because the three maiden sisters always wear blue merino
+gowns in winter, and blue muslin ones in summer; and because they are
+all so fond of singing that no family of birds could be more musical.
+They have a pet poodle and a pet squirrel, too. The poodle is very fat,
+and his hair sticks out so much all over him, that he looks perpetually
+astonished, as if he had just seen a spook. He always stands on the
+window sill, when the sash is raised of an afternoon, and glares into
+the street until he sees the bachelor brother coming. Then he achieves a
+series of frantic yells and bounces, until somebody comes to open the
+door and lets him out, when he waddles to the front steps to meet his
+master, wagging his tail to that tremendous extent, that it looks like
+the shuttle of a steam power loom.
+
+The squirrel is slim and sleek, and seems to enjoy life amazingly, he
+hops about so. When one of the Miss Bluejays takes him in her arms, he
+won't stay there, but gets away, and walks all over her head and
+shoulders; and at last runs down her back and disappears.
+
+Then, at No. 11, a very fat gentleman lives with his fat and pretty
+wife, and round dumpling of a baby. As I don't know him either, I call
+him Mr. Fatty, and he seems to be a "good-natured giant." I saw a little
+boy actually stop short to stare at him the other day, when he was
+sitting out at his front door--he is such a regular roly-poly of a
+gentleman--but he only laughed good-temperedly, and never got vexed in
+the least. I don't advise you to try this with all fat gentlemen though;
+they might accidentally sit down on a chair--where you were--afterward,
+and that would be the last of you. This piece of advice, however, is a
+great secret between you and me!
+
+[Illustration]
+
+He is so glad to meet the fat baby when he comes home at night, that I
+can see him in the parlor first kissing it almost black and blue, and
+then tossing it up in the air until I feel as though its head must come
+bump against the ceiling, but it doesn't--and at last, carrying it off
+perched on his shoulder, and looking very much perturbed in its spirits.
+
+But the pleasantest neighbors of all live exactly opposite, at No. 9.
+They take tea every evening in the back parlor; and as the front window
+shades are up, and only the back room lighted, I can always see them at
+their cheerful meal. The rooms are furnished in winter with dark red
+velvet carpets and furniture; with red damask curtains and red velvet
+paper hangings. In summer they put up white curtains, and carpets and
+furniture have cool, cream-colored linen coverings, so that the parlors
+look cozy and charming at all seasons.
+
+As for the family there is a papa and mamma, of course, and a dear
+little girl and boy. The little girl is about ten years old, I should
+think, with great, dark-blue eyes, and curling auburn hair. Her cheeks
+are as rosy as ripe peaches, and her teeth as white as so many pearls.
+Her nose does turn up at the end a little, to be sure; but that is
+rather saucy and becoming than otherwise; and she always looks so sweet
+tempered, and full of fun, too, when I see her of an evening, that I am
+sure she is as good as pie, and as merry as a cricket! Her little
+brother, who is a year or two younger, looks very much like her, and
+their obedient and pretty behavior at table is something really
+beautiful to observe.
+
+It is nearly a year now, since I moved into my lodging at "No. 10," and
+began to wonder what No. 9's name was; and now I must make haste and
+tell you how, only last June, I became acquainted with these dear little
+neighbors of mine.
+
+One pleasant Friday morning, after breakfast, I put on my old-fashioned
+beaver hat, and taking my gold-headed cane in one hand and my market
+basket in the other, I trotted out to buy something nice for dinner;
+for, you see, I am a particular old bachelor, and like to market for
+myself.
+
+Just as I was coming down the steps, the door of No. 9 opened, and the
+little girl ran down _her_ steps. She looked so bright and pretty in her
+cunning round straw hat with the blue ribbons, and white Marseilles
+cloak, carrying her satchel of books and lunch basket in her hand, that
+I could not help nodding to her. So she nodded to me, and then _I_
+nodded again and smiled, and we each walked along on our own side of the
+way. When we came to the corner I thought I would cross over and scrape
+some more acquaintance with my little neighbor. Now on the side of her
+satchel, I saw, when I came near her, was printed in gold letters,
+"Nelly Lawson;" so I said, as cheerily as I could, in my old, quavering
+voice:
+
+"Good morning, Neighbor Nelly!"
+
+The little maiden looked up in my face in a shy fashion at first; but
+when she saw what a mild, gray-headed old bachelor had bade her good
+morning, she took courage, and answered, "Good morning, sir."
+
+"So you are going to school this fine day?"
+
+"Yes; I go to school, but brother Jimmy doesn't; he learns at home. I
+think he is going next year. Have you got a baby at your house? We
+have."
+
+"No," said I, sighing; "I haven't got any baby; I am an old bachelor.
+Will you marry me?"
+
+"Oh, I am too little," she replied quite seriously. "You will have to
+wait until I grow up to you."
+
+I laughed, and asked her, "Don't you want to go to market with me before
+you go to school? There is plenty of time."
+
+"No," replied my little neighbor, firmly; "I can't go anywheres that
+mamma does not know of."
+
+"That's right!" I said. "Don't do anything your mother would disapprove.
+Well, Neighbor Nelly, since you won't go to market with me, I must go to
+school with you; and tell your mother that Neighbor Josiah Oldbird would
+like you to take a walk with him to-morrow; will you?"
+
+"Oh yes! that would be real nice!" said my little neighbor with a
+joyous skip.
+
+By this time we were walking along hand in hand; and soon, seeing my
+little neighbor look in at the window of the candy shop round the corner
+from our street, I thought I would take her in and buy her some candy.
+So in we marched, Nelly's great blue eyes dancing with pleased
+expectation, and stood close by the counter, waiting for our turn to
+come. There were a good many people in the candy shop, and we had to
+wait some time; so, to amuse ourselves, Neighbor Nelly and I turned
+round, and began looking at the funny folks near us.
+
+There was one very fat old country woman, who seemed to be buying
+"quarter or pound," as she said, of every kind of candy in the shop. As
+soon as the papers were handed to her she began eating out of them, and
+before she left, I should think, she had eaten about two pounds of
+candy. Besides the old woman, there were a great many little children,
+who only wanted a penny's worth each; but they hesitated so long whether
+to have "taffie" or "molasses," a lemon-candy horse, or a cinnamon-candy
+trumpet, that they were the most troublesome customers of anybody. Then
+there were several older boys and girls; some, I am sorry to say,
+picking up a loose bit of candy every time the shopman turned away--as
+if that were not stealing; and finally, there was Neighbor Nelly and I,
+who did none of these things, but just looked on, and waited until the
+shopman came to serve us.
+
+I bought some lemon candy, as clear as a bit of yellow glass, and some
+pungent cinnamon, and delectable chocolate; and then I popped the papers
+into Neighbor Nelly's satchel, and we hurried on to school. We had not
+far to go now, and when we came to the house, my little new friend bid
+me good-by, and thanked me so sweetly, that I went away quite a happy
+old bachelor.
+
+In the evening I was looking out of my window as usual, when I saw the
+servant girl come in to light the gas in the back parlor at No. 9, with
+Neighbor Nelly and the little brother Jimmy behind her. While she was
+setting the tea table, the children came running to the window, and both
+nodded and smiled at me. Presently the little boy thrust both hands in
+his pockets, and held them up crammed full of candy. "Thank you, Mr. Old
+Bachelor!" he shouted; "we like you real well!"
+
+That made me real happy; for I am not a crabbed old bachelor by any
+means. In a minute more their father came home; and as they all sat
+around the pleasant tea table, I hope they talked of their lonely old
+neighbor, who watched them from his window.
+
+The next morning, as I was reading the paper, in came the servant and
+gave me the funniest little note! It was addressed on the outside, "To
+my neighbor Oldbird," and ran thus:
+
+          "MY DEAR NEIGHBOR:
+
+          "Mamma says I may take a walk with you this
+          morning, because you are a good old bachelor.
+          Jimmy wants to go, and Gipsey. Gipsey is my dog.
+          He is black and tan, and his tail curls round so,
+          that papa says you might use it for a cork-screw.
+          Jimmy and I mean to try some time. Gipsey likes to
+          be on the seashore, and so does baby. We are going
+          there next week--to Long Branch. I hope you will
+          write me a letter when I am gone, and I am
+                    Your affectionate
+                                        "NEIGHBOR NELLY.
+
+          "Saturday Morning."
+
+You may believe how pleased I was with this dear little note, and I
+thought I would answer it. So I sat down at my writing desk, found a
+cunning little sheet of paper, with a flag on it, and commenced.
+
+Now I happened to think, at that moment, of some very comical letters
+written by the great poet, Tom Hood, to his little friends on the
+seashore; and as they were ever so much funnier than anything I could
+have written, I copied one of them out, and sent it to my little new
+friend.
+
+          "MY DEAR NEIGHBOR NELLY:
+
+          "I am very glad you are to walk with me, and very
+          sorry you are going away so soon. Do you like to
+          be on the seashore? I did, when I was a boy. I
+          and my brother chucked hundreds of stones into the
+          sea, when we were there, but we came away before
+          we could fill it up. Then there is the fun of
+          finding shiny pebbles and jelly fish on the beach.
+          I used to think jelly fish were made of
+          sea-calves' feet, and no flavoring. I suppose the
+          mermaids eat them at their parties.
+
+          "Then there's fishing on the seaside. I used to
+          catch flat fish sometimes, with a long string
+          line, it was like swimming a kite. If you go out
+          in a surf boat, take care it does not "flounder"
+          and get "squamped," as some people say, instead of
+          founder and swamped.
+
+          "Have you ever been bathed in the sea? I was,
+          and, dear me! how I kicked and screamed; or, at
+          least, tried to scream, but the sea, ships and
+          all, began to run into my mouth, and so I shut it
+          up. Remember, when you are bathing, if you meet
+          with a shark, the best way is to bite off his
+          legs, if you can, before he walks away with yours;
+          and pray, pray, pray take care of yourself in the
+          sea, for in some places, they say, it has not even
+          a bottom to go to.
+
+          "Could you bring me a little crab off the beach?
+          If you would catch one for me, and teach it to
+          shake hands without nipping and biting, it would
+          make me quite happy, for I have not had any toys
+          or playthings in a long time. It would be a good
+          plan to hire a little crab to teach the baby to
+          crawl, if he can't walk yet. Bless him! But I must
+          not write on him any more; he is so soft, and I
+          have nothing but steel pens.
+
+          "Now good-by; give my love to everybody, and my
+          compliments to all the rest, and believe me, up
+          hill and down dale,
+
+                    "Your affectionate neighbor,
+                                         "JOSIAH OLDBIRD."
+
+Then I put my letter in a flag envelope, sealed it up tight, and wrote
+on it, "To my dear Neighbor Nelly," and had the maid take it to her.
+
+Presently I could see two little figures flitting about in one of the
+upper chambers, and soon after all four of us, Nelly, Jimmy, I, and
+Gipsey, were in the street. Gipsey was a "toy terrier" that ought to
+have belonged to "Commodore Nutt," the dwarf at "Barnum's," and ran
+along on three legs most of the time, with the fourth, and his
+cork-screw tail elevated in the air for joy at being allowed to join the
+party; while the children were all hop, skip, and jump, and kept tight
+hold of a hand of mine apiece, as though they were afraid of flying away
+if they let go. Meanwhile, I walked quietly along, with my market basket
+on my arm, a sober old bachelor. I expect the people who passed us in
+the street thought me a rather incongruous addition to such a frisky
+party; but then, you know, children _must_ caper about. Bless your
+heart! it would never do in the world to see children mincing solemnly
+along, like little old men and women; it would be as absurd as to have
+my Neighbor Nelly wearing her great-grandmother's coal-scuttle bonnet!
+The last idea struck me as so odd, that I drew a little picture of
+Neighbor Nelly in this guise when I got home, and here it is. How do you
+like it?
+
+[Illustration]
+
+We thought we would go to market first. So we walked slowly down Fourth
+Avenue, and crossed over to the market where the Seventh Regiment armory
+is, opposite the Cooper Institute.
+
+"My cousin is a Seventh Regimenter!" said Jimmy as we climbed up the
+iron steps; "he often let us look on at his company drills last winter,
+and afterward Nelly and I drilled in our yard. The big boy who comes to
+see the old ladies next door, looked over the fence and laughed at us,
+but we didn't care; and we mean to fight for our country like everything
+when we are bigger; that is, I mean to, and Nelly would like to, but
+she's only a girl, you know."
+
+"Only a girl!" repeated Nelly, tossing her long curls; "girls are a
+great deal of use, too; I mended all his stockings and all papa's this
+week--think of that, neighbor Oldbird!"
+
+"That was really splendid!" said I; and just then we entered the market.
+
+The very first thing we met was a horrid big dog, that belonged to some
+butcher; and, bless me! how he began to show his great rows of teeth,
+and growl at Gipsey! Nelly gave a little scream, and tried to hide
+behind me; Jimmy valiantly flew at the big dog with my walking stick;
+and poor little Gipsey nearly stood on the end of his tail with fright,
+and squealed dismally. What a fuss we were all in, to be sure! So at
+last, to quiet the disputants, I caught Gipsey up, and put him in my
+coat pocket, where he sat, looking out at the top, very much comforted.
+
+Then we turned to the right, and went by the brightest and prettiest
+stall in the whole market. It was kept by a Frenchman, who, in his own
+language, would be called a "_charcutier_;" but Jimmy and Nell shouted
+out together "Oh, there's the _pig man_!" as loud as ever they could,
+and then stopped, blushing very much, because they were afraid the pork
+merchant heard them. I expect he did; for he looked very funny when we
+came close, and smoothing down his snowy apron with his fat hands, said
+"Bonjour, mademoiselle!" and laughed good humoredly. There was a great
+"head cheese" on the pig man's marble counter, moulded in the shape of a
+boar's head. The tusks were made of white carrots, the eyes of red
+jelly, and the sides of the dish it was on were beautifully ornamented
+with white roses, cut out of turnips, and parsley foliage. Then there
+were ever so many pork pies, with the most elegant wreaths of flowers on
+the top crust, comical little hams already cooked, and fat dumplings of
+sucking pigs, as pink as baby himself!
+
+When we had looked about us a little, we concluded to buy a pork pie of
+the pig man; and while that was being nicely packed up in paper, out
+popped Gipsey from my pocket, and stood triumphant on the counter, in
+the midst of the little pigs and savory pastries. I don't know what
+forays he would not have made upon them, if he had not been captured by
+the pig man, Jimmy, and me; but he did contrive to jump right into the
+very middle of another pork-pie! and then we had to pay for that, too;
+and wipe the gravy off Gipsey's feet and the ends of his tail and nose,
+and button him up tight in the market basket for half an hour, as a
+punishment for his naughtiness. As to the pie we had bought, Jimmy
+carried that, and Gipsey cut up so many antics inside the basket, that
+he nearly wriggled it out of my hand altogether.
+
+After that we went on, and found, dear me! such a comfortable old market
+woman, who sold us a nice little chicken, and some fresh vegetables, and
+gave the children each a great handful of cherries; but we had to tell
+her to send them home, with our pie, because Gipsey had the basket in
+possession.
+
+Then we walked into the street again, and when we had let Gipsey out of
+prison, concluded to leave the basket at my baker's, and take a walk in
+Broadway. Dear, dear me! what quantities of shop windows there were to
+stare into, and how we flattened our three noses, and spread our six
+hands all over every one of them, while we admired the splendid picture
+books, the stores of sugar plums, or the wonders of toys they contained!
+While we were occupied in this way, a little girl, poorly dressed, and
+lugging a large bundle of work in both arms, came along, and stopping
+beside us at the window of the most splendid toy shop, stood looking
+wistfully in.
+
+Neighbor Nelly straightway twitched my hand, and whispered, "Oh look,
+Neighbor Oldbird! what a poor little girl! I don't suppose she ever saw
+a doll before in her life. How she must wish she had one!"
+
+"Suppose we ask her?" I said.
+
+"Will you ask?" she answered; "I don't like to."
+
+"Nonsense! ask her yourself; she won't eat you, or Gipsey either;" for
+Gipsey was sidling away between my feet, as if he were alarmed too; the
+saucy scamp!
+
+Thereupon Nelly moved closer to the poor girl, and said, in a kind,
+little, timid voice, "Do you like dolls?"
+
+"Yes, very much!" said the child, with a surprised look.
+
+"Oh, so do I!" cried Nelly, rapturously. "I have lots of them at home;
+let me see, there's Jenny, and Willie, and old black Nanny, and--" she
+stopped short, seeing the other look wistfully at her, and then said,
+"Oh, I forgot! you have none, perhaps; would you like to have one?"
+
+"Oh yes, miss!" said the child; "not so much for myself, though, as my
+little sister; she is sick, and can't do anything, poor Clara! but I
+work, and help my mother!" she added, proudly.
+
+"What does your mother do?" asked Jimmy.
+
+"She makes shirts for the army; and I do all the button holes."
+
+"I can't make a button hole," said Nelly, regretfully.
+
+Here I proposed we should walk into the shop, and after we had looked
+all we wanted to at the pretty things, and the children, with screams of
+delight, had ridden in turn on a "spring rocking horse," that sent them
+flying half way to the top of the glass cases behind the counter, I gave
+Jimmy and Nelly each two shillings, and told them to buy whatever the
+little girl would like best. The poor little thing's eyes sparkled with
+happiness when Nelly bought her the composition doll she chose out of a
+heap that were piled in a great basket, gorgeously dressed in pink
+mosquito netting, as I thought, but which Nelly informed me was a
+"tarletane;" and Jimmy laid out his money on a tiny bowl and pitcher of
+sprigged china ware, and an astonished china baby sitting in a bath, and
+looking as if it had turned on the hot water, and couldn't turn it off
+again.
+
+Then we trundled Gipsey about a little in a wicker wagon we found, and
+put him in the patent baby-jumper to take an airing; and at last, when
+we had teased him till he barked like one of the toy poodles on the
+shelves, we took ourselves off, and sent the poor child on her way
+rejoicing.
+
+But it was getting late, and time to trot home, before His Majesty the
+Sun roasted us all like so many eggs. Our street is always shady and
+cool, it seems to me, and we were glad enough to find ourselves once
+more on its pavement. I invited Nelly and Jimmy and Gipsey all to take
+lunch with me, and didn't we have fun! We ate the pork pie, and stuffed
+Gipsey with lumps of sugar, and discovered a pot of raspberry jam in the
+closet, and ornamented ourselves with red rims round our mouths, digging
+it out; and sliced, and buttered, and disposed of almost half a loaf of
+French bread, and hardly stopped laughing, chattering, and barking a
+single minute.
+
+And then, after all this was over, my little neighbors bid me good-by,
+and Gipsey barked at me and poked his cold nose into my hand, which
+meant "Good-by and thank you," all the same, and the three went home as
+merry as crickets.
+
+I could not see much of my little neighbors before they went away the
+next Tuesday, but I was invited to take tea at No. 9 the very last
+evening; and then, what should I find out but that Nelly's mamma was the
+daughter of an old friend of mine whom I had not seen for years! So we
+felt quite like relations right away. Just as tea was over, lo and
+behold! there was a tremendous hullaballoo on the back piazza, and when
+we poked our heads out of the window to see what the matter was, there
+was Gipsey high and dry on the back of Miss Bluejay's fat poodle--having
+squeezed through the railing which separated the two piazzas--with the
+squirrel, which had come to the rescue of his friend, hanging on to his
+tail! and all three setting up a squeal of remonstrance. Gipsey's plight
+was so extremely well deserved, that we wouldn't go to his rescue; but
+at last, with a tremendous twist, he snatched away his cork-screw tail,
+and ran to hide himself and his injured feelings under the sofa in the
+front room. How we laughed at him! and how Nelly tried to make him come
+out and be lump-sugared into good humor, but he wouldn't; so, to make
+up, we coaxed the fat poodle, which had been staring in at the
+performance and sniffing satisfaction, to sit up and beg for us until we
+gave him the lump of sugar. Then Mrs. Lawson sat down to the piano, and
+began playing a funny little hornpipe tune that sounded just like a
+banjo; and, to our astonishment, the fat poodle developed another
+accomplishment; for, getting on his hind legs, he gravely hopped up and
+down on the piazza, keeping time to the music, until we nearly died of
+laughter.
+
+You may fancy, after all these comical doings, that we managed to spend
+a merry evening, and when I at last bid my neighbors good night, it was
+no longer with the feeling that I was a lonely old bachelor.
+
+I did find the street pretty lonely though, after they had gone, next
+day, with two great big trunks strapped on behind the carriage, a
+middling sized trunk hoisted up in front, and several small carpet bags,
+and tiny tawny bundles and baskets in every place where room could be
+found. I fancy Gipsey was in one of the baskets, by the way it bounced
+and wriggled about in Neighbor Nelly's lap; but I don't know; I only saw
+it from my window, whence I waved an adieu to them as they rolled away.
+
+A few days after they had gone, I thought I would amuse myself, in their
+absence, by trying to find out if any of the other neighbors knew
+anything about my neighbor, Nelly. I succeeded in learning what two of
+them knew, and they shall tell it for themselves in the stories that
+follow, and which I have written out. And now, if any other dear little
+children have been pleased with me, in what I have told of my walks and
+talks with Neighbor Nelly, just let them come to No. 10, and meet the
+hearty greeting and loving welcome of the
+
+                                            OLD BACHELOR!
+
+
+
+
+THE BIG BOY'S STORY.
+
+
+YOU want me to tell you what I know about the pretty little girl next
+door? Well, I'm ready to begin, if you won't mind my talk; I'm only a
+boy, you know, and can't use fine words--that's all humbug.
+
+My name is Tom Halstead. I am nephew to the Miss Brandlaws, who live at
+No. 7. The idea of calling my darling old friskies "The Bluejays!" (If
+you don't give me that Australian post stamp I saw in your desk, I'll
+tell 'em, too!) However, to go on with my story.
+
+One morning last winter, just at the end of the Christmas holidays,
+while I was on a visit there, I didn't know what on earth to do with
+myself. So I caught Poddles (that's the poodle), dressed him up in Aunt
+Elsie's nightcap, tied a life preserver round him, and put him in the
+portable shower-bath, just for fun; it didn't hurt him a bit, and--would
+you believe it? the hateful thing hopped out, squealing murder, shook
+himself all over the carpet, scratched off the nightcap, and danced
+round the room with it in a fury, till it was in perfect rags.
+
+Up rushed Aunt Elsie, and was so horrified when she saw the carpet and
+her cap in such a mess, and "darling doggie" all "wetsey-petsey," that
+she locked me up in my room for the rest of the day on bread and water!
+and there was gingerbread, with raisins in it, baking down stairs!!
+Horrid!!!
+
+Of course I couldn't spend my time sucking my thumbs; so, like a
+sensible fellow, I set myself to find some better employment, and soon a
+grand idea came into my head. I had just finished reading a jolly
+old-fashioned novel I found in Uncle Herbert's room, called "The Castle
+Spectre: a Tale of Spain;" where a goose of a lover, such a spooney! had
+scrambled down from the top of a castle, hanging on to his bedclothes.
+_Now_, don't you see it? Perhaps not, so I'll explain.
+
+My bedroom is the third floor, back room, always; and you know that
+piazza at the back of the house? Well, what did I do, but twitch off
+_my_ bedcover--nice white one it was, too--tie it to the bedpost, and
+let the end hang out of the window. Then I scrambled out, and slid down
+the wall like a streak of lightning! You can't think what jolly fun it
+was!
+
+There was lots of amusement in the yard; twelve cats on the fence to
+plague, and no end of snow to make balls and pelt the cook with; beside,
+the gingerbread was just baked, and I got a _brown corner_! So! there!
+while I was eating it, and it was so hot that it almost sizzled, all at
+once I heard a lot of noise in the next yard. Some boys seemed to be
+having a drill there; so I ran up the steps leading from the piazza to
+the ground, and looked over the fence. But lor now! what do you think?
+one of the boys was a girl! She had on long india-rubber boots, and I
+called out, "Go it, Boots!"
+
+Then the little boy that was with her, who seemed to be her brother,
+looked so mad at me! and, really and truly, I couldn't help plaguing
+them a little. I know you think I was real mean; but if you had seen how
+funny they looked, in paper cocked hats, with turkey tails for feathers,
+and the little boy thumping a big tin saucepan for a drum, you would
+have laughed, too; so you needn't look so provoked, Neighbor Oldbird!
+
+"Gee up, awkward squad!" I said; "double quick halt on the right flank!
+Ha-ahup!"
+
+But the little girl only laughed good humoredly, and said: "Jimmy and I
+belong to the Seventh Regiment, and drill in the last fashion. Don't you
+want to come and learn the Lefferts Tactics?"
+
+Wasn't she a nice little thing! Never got mad or anything, but just gave
+me back as good as I sent. I declare, I fell right smack in love with
+her that minute, and I don't care a fig now for the girl I met in
+dancing school, upon my word I don't; so I rushed back into the
+kitchen, coaxed the cook to give me two more hunks of gingerbread, and
+called out, "Won't you have some cake?"
+
+They came running up on the piazza like lamplighters; and while they
+were eating the gingerbread, _I_ was eating something I got especially
+for myself at the same time. Did you ever try it? You have a great big
+sour apple, as cold as it can be, and a tremendous pickled pepper, as
+hot as it can be; then you take first a bite of the pepper, and nearly
+burn all the skin off your throat, and then a bite of the apple to cool
+it again; and so on. It's gorgeous, I tell you!
+
+Presently the little boy (whose name, as I said, was Jimmy), stopped
+his eating to ask me, "Do you live in New York?"
+
+"No, I live at White Plains. I go to the Military Academy there; don't
+you want me to show you some drill?"
+
+"Oh, Cousin Charley is going to teach us some time. He belongs to the
+Seventh Regiment. We love to be soldiers, though, and we know a boy,
+Freddy Jourdain his name is, who got up a whole regiment, and has
+parades, and went into camp, and everything."
+
+"We have a camp at White Plains," I told them. "Do you ever go there in
+summer, Miss----" here I stopped, rather awkwardly, not knowing what her
+name was.
+
+"Oh, I'm not 'Miss' anybody;" she said; "I'm Nelly; but we go to the
+seashore in summer 'most always."
+
+"Can't you dress up in your uniform, and show us how you look at
+school?" said Jimmy.
+
+"Yes, if you like;" here I remembered that the key of my room was in
+Aunt Elsie's pocket, and had to say, "but I can't get into my room now;
+I was locked in, and Aunt Elsie has the key."
+
+"How do you come to be here, then?" said Nelly; "why, dear me, just look
+at the counterpane hanging out of the window; how funny!"
+
+"Why, that's the way I got out!" I said; and so I told them all about
+"The Castle Spectre," and "Lord Alonzo Algernon" Spooneyman, and we got
+into such a perfect _gig_ of laughter, that we nearly rode off in it!
+(Now, don't say that's not a good joke, or I'll not tell another word of
+my story.)
+
+Just then out came Poddles, looking as surprised as ever; and Nelly
+exclaimed, "Oh, there's that funny old dog! what do you call him?"
+
+"His name is Poddles!" said I; "_I_ christened him."
+
+"What a queer name!" said Jimmy; "let's take him into our house and see
+what Gipsey and he will do!"
+
+"Good!" said I. So, without remembering that plaguey white spread, I cut
+over the piazza railings with Poddles under one arm, and we all three
+rushed up stairs together.
+
+They had such a famous play room, with a splendid swing, and a
+teetertorter, and ten-pins, and I don't know what beside; and there was
+the nattiest little dog! but you know him, that "toy-terrier" of theirs.
+Poddles looked a greater fright than ever beside him; so, to pay him
+off, we put that wretched Pod into a basket, tied it fast to the swing,
+and swung him up to the ceiling. It frightened him half to death, and
+serve him right, for being so ugly! after which he and Gipsey went to
+sleep in a big rocking chair, as friendly as possible. Then I gave Nelly
+a splendid swing, "ran under," and cracked my cocoanut three times,
+beside making my arms ache like everything; but I didn't care, she was
+such a dear little thing.
+
+Afterward Jimmy went and got a great plateful of rosy apples; and just
+as we were eating them, and having such fun, up came one of our girls,
+and said that "Miss Brandlaw wanted Master Tom right home!" Wasn't it
+hateful? But, of course, I had to go; so I bundled Poddles under my arm
+again, bid them good-by, and walked off with Mary; but I poked her ribs
+and set Poddles at her all the way, which was some comfort.
+
+I expected a scolding when I came home, and I didn't have one--oh no!
+Aunt Elsie wanted to know where I thought I should die when I went
+to--(no, I believe it was the other way, but never mind)--if I hung
+best bed spreads out of the window, and left my room without permission?
+besides informing me that she should write to ma', and have me sent for.
+Finally, she marched me up stairs again; and when I said I _must_ have
+something to do to keep me out of mischief, she gave me a Sunday school
+book to read, and took herself off.
+
+Of course you will say I was dreadfully wicked not to like the Sunday
+school book, but I couldn't. It was so full of hard names and long
+words, and was all about sanctification and justification and
+regeneration, and how was I to understand a word of it? I love Bible
+stories, but I don't think there is a boy or girl who _understands hard
+doctrines_. Do you, Neighbor Oldbird?
+
+I pretty soon gave up that employment, and amused myself instead with
+pelting the cats on the fence with a few marbles, and trying on my
+uniform, to see how I looked in it; until Aunt Elsie relented, I
+suppose, for she came up and asked me through the keyhole if I was
+sorry, and wouldn't do any more. You can fancy what my answer was, and
+after dinner I got permission to go out and play on the sidewalk.
+
+Neighbor Nelly and Jimmy joined me there pretty soon, and we had such
+fun playing "tag" and driving hoop. It wasn't hoop _time_, to be sure,
+but that was no matter. Then, when we were tired of that, we all sat
+down together on the upper step of No. 9, and began talking about their
+school and mine, and what we learned.
+
+"Do you ever learn pieces of poetry?" asked Nelly. "My teacher, Miss
+Backboard, always gives the girls each a piece of poetry every Friday;
+so we call that poetry day."
+
+"I used to learn pieces too," I said; "but I don't care much for poetry
+unless it's funny."
+
+"Tell us a funny piece," said Jimmy.
+
+"Ah yes, do!" added Nelly; and, of course, when a _lady_ asked me I had
+to, though I felt pretty bashful; so I began.
+
+
+A DAY OF MISHAPS.
+
+(AS TOLD BY BOBBY BREAKWINDOW, A SCHOOLBOY.)
+
+[Illustration]
+
+[Illustration: BOBBY AND ROVER.]
+
+[Illustration]
+
+  Oh dear! was there ever anybody so unlucky as I am,
+  From General ----, who lost that battle t'other day,
+      all the way back to Priam!
+  Come, sit down--do, and let me tell you all about it,
+      and what's the matter;
+  Perhaps it will do me good to have a nice, comfortable,
+      miserable chatter.
+  To begin, then. This morning I woke, and thought I was
+      up with the sun.
+  So never hurried myself; but dressed slow, and came down,
+      to find breakfast all done,
+  And nothing left for me but one cold slapjack, and all
+      the chicken gone,
+  Unless, to be sure, I could have eaten the drumsticks,
+      and one perfectly clean breast bone!
+  And, of course, I had to make haste, for it was nine
+      o'clock and after,
+  And the master had offered a prize to the earliest boy--and
+      here was I beaten by even lazy Tommy Shafter!
+  But it was no use to fret, so I snatched up my satchel, and
+      would have been off in a minute,
+  When lo and behold! my geography was gone; and though we hunted
+      the house, it was plain it wasn't in it,
+  Till at last I remembered that yesterday I had gone after school
+      to the dog pound,
+  And then been fishing with Fred Lee; so, probably, it was at the
+      bottom of the frog pond!
+  Well, off to school I went, and came in after every schoolmate;
+  So, to pay me off, the schoolmaster and all the boys called me
+      Bobby Toolate!
+  But that wasn't all; for the class was just up for spelling,
+  And I didn't know the lesson, and Tommy Shafter prompted me to
+      spell boots _butes_; and that's all I got for telling,
+  Besides going to the foot of the class, and having to get the
+      lesson over;
+  I tell you what! a hand-organ monkey's life, compared to a
+      schoolboy's, is perfect rolling in clover!
+  And I wish I was a monkey, if I did get beaten--yes, that I do--
+  In a red coat all over spangles, and blue trowsers, and a long
+      tail behind to come through!
+  Well, thank goodness, it's over; but that's not the half of my
+      pother;
+  For the very minute I got out of school, Tommy Shafter began
+      to plague and bother,
+  And wanted me to ride on the gate with him that goes in to his
+      grandfather Chowser's;
+  So I did; but there's spikes on the top of that gate; and,
+      confound it, I went to work and tore my trowsers!
+  Just then along came Miss Kitty Snow, and didn't I look dashing,
+  And that hateful Tommy Shafter bawled out "How are you, trowsers?"
+      and jumped down and walked off with her; but just see if I
+      don't give him a thrashing!
+  To pay him off for what he did and more too; for, when I came home
+      weeping and wailing,
+  Pa boxed my ears, and said I was such a bad boy I shouldn't go
+      with him now out sailing;
+  So I had the pleasure of seeing the rockaway drive up to the door,
+  And pa and ma getting in, and sister Tilly, and brother Sam, and
+      ever so many more,
+  All looking so happy and gay, and not caring a bit for poor Bobby,
+  Just as if I _wanted_ to get into scrapes, and mischief and
+      bad conduct were quite my hobby!
+  Then off they whirled; and as I was left alone, I thought I might
+      as well be up and doing.
+  Oh, good gracious, why didn't I sit still? but how could I tell
+      what was brewing?
+  So I went to the stable to see our big dog Rover, and thought
+      I would take him out with me;
+  When, just as I had slipped his chain, he broke loose, and ran,
+      I don't know where! and, I'm sure, pa will never forgive me!
+  For he thought so much of Rover. Oh, dear me, what shall I do?
+  If it would be any use in the world, I really think I should begin
+      to boohoo!
+  The stable boy told me not to take him; but I should like to see
+      myself minding him _rather_;
+  And of course, out of revenge, he'll just go and make the worst
+      of it to father.
+  Well, one would think that was enough; but when I came back to
+      the house, oh jolly!
+  There was our big cat just making a spring at sister Tilda's
+      pretty polly!
+  And in my haste to save the bird I threw the poker at the cat
+      and killed her!
+  And got myself in for a scolding from ma, and no great thanks
+      from Tilda.
+  It's six o'clock now; so, I suppose, they'll soon be home as
+      cross as any Tartar,
+  To give it to me for being such a bad boy, though I'm sure
+      I'm a regular martyr;
+  Don't you think so now, after all that I've just been telling?
+  No breakfast, no geography, late at school, tore my trowsers,
+      kept at home, lost the dog, killed the cat, and didn't know
+      my spelling!
+  I think the best thing I can do is to go to bed, put my head
+      under the clothes,
+  And in a good, comfortable sleep try to forget all my sorrows
+      and my woes;
+  But you may be sure, after this, I shall not neglect to take
+      warning,
+  And begin to-morrow all right, without any sort of fail, by
+      getting up early in the morning!
+
+"There!" said I, when I had finished, and it quite wore my tongue thin
+to repeat such a long piece of poetry. "What do you think of _that_ for
+a story?"
+
+"I think it is real funny," said Nelly, laughing; "I wish I knew
+something to tell."
+
+"I can say a funny piece!" shouted Jimmy.
+
+"Well, say it, then," we two--Nelly and I--put in.
+
+Up he jumped right off, struck a funny attitude, and began:
+
+          "The boy stood on the burning deck,
+           Peeling potatoes by the peck!
+           The flames rolled on and scorched his shins,
+           As he stood peeling potato skins!
+           'Oh pa'!' he cried, 'the flames is hot,
+           Come, put the potatoes in the pot!'
+           But his father, alas! ne'er came to sup,
+           So the flames rolled on and frizzled him up!"
+
+"Did you ever hear anything so ridiculous as that?" cried Nelly. "Poor
+Casabianca! I used to cry over him dreadfully; but I shall never think
+of him now without laughing. Where did you learn that, Jimmy?"
+
+"Oh, Harry Agnew told it to me; he said he repeated it one day in
+school, when the master asked him if he could say a piece of poetry, and
+everybody burst out laughing. The master laughed too; so he couldn't put
+anybody down for a bad mark, though Harry was afraid he would."
+
+"That was almost equal to the trick we played at school," said I. "We
+wanted the doctor to give us a holiday, but he didn't seem to see it; so
+when we were called up for our reading after recess, we were told to
+read Montgomery's poem called 'Questions to Birds and their Answers.'
+One of the verses is about the swallow, and reads thus:
+
+          "'Swallow, why homeward turned thy joyful wing?'
+           'In a far land I heard the voice of spring;
+           I found myself that moment on the way,
+           My wings, my wings, they had not power to stay.'
+
+--but we changed it as though the doctor was asking us a question and we
+were answering--this way:
+
+          "'Boys! why are you forever on the wing,
+           Wanting a holiday for everything?'
+           'From you we are so glad to get away,
+           Our legs, our legs, they will not let us stay.'"
+
+How we all laughed over this; it was real true, too; and pretty soon
+after, as it was getting dark, I bid them good-by and ran home.
+
+Next morning, what should Aunt Elsie and Aunt Ruth (Aunt Priscilla was
+away on a visit) take into their heads, but that they hadn't had any fun
+house-cleaning--(I suppose they must think it's fun, or they wouldn't do
+it so often)--for ever so long; so nothing would suit them but to set
+the whole house in an uproar as quick as possible. Of course, I was in
+the way, whether I stayed in the garret or the kitchen; knocked down
+three pails and a scrubbing brush every time I went down stairs, nearly
+drowned Poddles in hot soapsuds, splashed myself all over with whitewash
+trying to "do" the kitchen ceiling (on my own account, when nobody was
+by), until I looked as if I had been out in a snowstorm, and watering
+the windows outside with the long hosepipe, until every one of them was
+dripping _inside_ like a waterfall.
+
+Now, Neighbor Nelly and Jimmy had been looking out of their parlor
+window, and advising me which were the best parts of our windows to play
+on, when, all of a sudden, Nelly said:
+
+"Why, Tom, it doesn't half clean the panes to do them that way; they
+ought to be washed with soap and hot water. Suppose we try it? Only
+think!" she went on, "how much your aunties would be obliged to us if we
+were to find out a new way to make windows clean, ever so much better
+than the old one!"
+
+"Splendid!" said I and Jimmy together. "Come, let's try it right away!"
+
+With that, Nelly and Jimmy came into our house, and into the front
+basement; Aunt Elsie and Aunt Ruth were both up stairs; so we had the
+two lower stories all to ourselves.
+
+As Nelly was afraid of spoiling her frock, I dived into the cook's
+dresser drawer, where she keeps her own table covers and clean dish
+cloths, and fished out a great big brown roller-towel, which we pinned
+round her neck, making her look in front as if she was tied up in a
+potato sack, with only her head left out. Then Jimmy and I took off our
+nice jackets, rolled up our shirt sleeves, lugged in three big yellow
+dishes full of hot water, spilling plenty on the way, found a long bar
+of brown soap, and helped ourselves to three more of Bridget's clean
+towels; and then we all three began scrubbing away at the windows!
+
+Such fun as we had! We put on the greatest lot of soap, and paid away
+with both hands, so as to make them good and _clean_, laughing and
+talking all the time; and when we thought the water had been used
+enough, or, rather when it was nearly all spilt, we took up our yellow
+bowls and marched into the kitchen for more.
+
+Our boiler, you must know, is a tin affair, like a large soup kettle
+without the handle, and has a faucet in front to draw the water off. We
+put it on the middle of the range, and keep it always full and boiling;
+and now, instead of filling our dishes right away, we began playing the
+kitchen was a steamboat, and the water heater the boiler, just ready to
+burst; so, of course, it was necessary to let off steam, which we did by
+drawing a little water at a time from the faucet into one of our yellow
+dishes, and tilting it back again as soon as the dish was full, beside
+"tooting," as loud as we could, to represent the commotion going on to
+perfection. We were soon so busy over this, that we forgot all about
+the front basement windows for ever so long, until we heard Aunt Elsie
+calling out, "Tom! Tom! where are you?"
+
+"Here I am, Aunt Elsie! come right along! Here we all are, washing the
+windows for you as nice as anything!"
+
+Down marched Aunt Elsie, short order; and the minute she came into the
+basement we heard her give an "O----h!" about a quarter of a mile long.
+We all rushed to ask what was the matter; and such a pickle as the
+windows were in you never did see. The soap was in streaks, and smears,
+and lumps all over the panes, making them look as if somebody had spilt
+a lot of hasty pudding on them, and it had stuck fast. Of course, as we
+left them so long, the soap had hardened on; and poor Nelly, frightened
+half out of her wits, began to cry. That put me up, I can tell you; I
+was determined Aunt Elsie shouldn't scold her; so I begged her not to be
+angry with anybody but me, for it wasn't their fault at all.
+
+"And I must say you are old enough to know better, Tom," said my aunt,
+looking at me reproachfully over the tops of her spectacles; "and as a
+punishment, you must get all the soap off the window before you have any
+dinner. The children had better go home."
+
+But now, what do you think that darling of a Nelly, and Jimmy did? They
+declared I shouldn't do it all alone by myself, but they would stay and
+help me; so, after Aunt Elsie had been coaxed to let us, we filled our
+dishes again, and went to work as busy as bees. It was pretty hard work
+getting the soap off, but we made a joke of it, and by the time the
+windows were fairly polished up, as bright as new pins, we were in a
+perfect frolic. I expect Nelly's bright eyes had something to do with
+it, for Aunt Elsie, after we had finished, and come shouting to her with
+our faces as red as fire, and considerable brown soap on us in spots,
+said, "we were famous workpeople," and gave us New Year's cookies, and
+almonds, and raisins for lunch. I had a Philopoena among my nuts,
+which I ate with Nelly; and pretty soon after they went home.
+
+I did hope she would catch me on the Philopoena, because I had
+something that I meant to give her all along; and this would be a famous
+chance. It was a nest of little boxes, made of plaid papier-mache, about
+a dozen, one inside the other; and when you came to the very last, and
+had opened that, there was a gold thimble and scissors, and a little
+gold bodkin, a needlecase full of tiny needles, and a puncher, just big
+enough for the queen of the fairies; I won it at a raffle on Christmas
+Eve, and kept it to give to some little girl, for, of course, it wasn't
+any use to me; what could I do with a thimble and needles? Sure enough,
+when I looked out of the back parlor window next morning, Neighbor Nelly
+looked out of _her_ window, said with a saucy smile, "Good morning, Mr.
+Tom--Philopoena!" and popped back again.
+
+"Good!" I said. So, after breakfast, I asked Aunt Elsie for a nice sheet
+of paper and a new pen, and then I ran up to my own room, and sat down
+to write a little note to my neighbor. I'm sure, that showed how much I
+liked her, if anything could, for I'd rather do a sum in compound
+fractions, or a French exercise, than write a note. It quite gives me
+the toothache; but at last I wrote something very pretty, as, I'm sure,
+you will say when I repeat it to you. This is what I said:
+
+          "MY DEAR MISS NELLY:
+
+          "I hope you will accept the little present I send
+          you for a Philopoena, because I like you very
+          much. I am real glad you caught me, for perhaps
+          this will remind you of me when I go back to
+          school. I hope the needles will sew all the holes
+          in your clothes, that the thimble will keep you
+          from pricking your pretty little finger, and that
+
+          "If you loves I as I loves you,
+           The scissors won't cut our love in two.
+
+          "Good-by.
+             "From your affectionate friend
+                                         "TOM."
+
+Then I packed up the boxes and the letter in nice white paper, and
+coaxed Mary to take it in right away; and you can't tell how many
+pretty, smiling thanks I had in return.
+
+But you think I am making my story too long, Neighbor Oldbird? Well,
+perhaps I am, but there seems to be so much to tell about Nelly, and the
+nice times we had together, that I don't know when to stop. I am 'most
+through now.
+
+The day I sent her the Philopoena present was the last of my stay in
+town; and after I had packed up my clothes ready to start (with a
+gorgeous plum cake and two jars of raspberry jam in a box, which my dear
+old Friskies gave me,--they always do make everything of me, in spite of
+their lectures), I went to Uncle Herbert's room to bid him good-by, for
+I knew I should not see him again before I started, and he made me the
+best present of all. It was a dear little watch and chain; for he said,
+as I was nearly fifteen, I was quite old enough to take care of one.
+Wasn't that kind of him?
+
+Well, dear me, I don't want to say good-by a bit, and I did not then;
+but, of course, it had to come, and I shook hands with my dear little
+friends, only wishing to goodness that I lived in New York.
+
+We promised about twenty-five times apiece always to be friends; and
+then I kissed Aunt Elsie and Aunt Ruth, pulled Poddles' ears for
+good-by, and pranced off all alone; of course, boys that have watches
+are plenty big enough to go from New York to White Plains by
+themselves. I suppose we always shall stay there, for papa is abominably
+fond of the country; but just wait until I am a man, and see if I don't
+come to live in New York, and marry Neighbor Nelly, if she will have me.
+Mind you keep that last remark a secret, now, Neighbor Oldbird! That's
+all there is about it.
+
+
+
+
+THE FAT GENTLEMAN'S STORY.
+
+
+          I'M in love with Neighbor Nelly,
+            Though I know she's only ten;
+          While I am five and forty,
+            And the _married-est_ of men.
+          I've a wife as fat as butter,
+            And a baby--such a boy!
+          With the plumpest cheeks and shoulders,
+            Who's his father's dearest joy.
+
+          Though a Square toes and a Buffer,
+            Still I've sunshine in my heart;
+          Still I'm fond of tops and marbles
+            Can appreciate a tart.
+          I can love my Neighbor Nelly,
+            Just as though I were a boy,
+          And would hand her cakes and apples,
+            From my depths of corduroy.
+
+          She is tall, and growing taller;
+            She is vigorous of limb;
+          (You should see her playing soldiers
+            With her little brother Jim!)
+          She has eyes as blue as damsons;
+            She has pounds of auburn curls;
+          She regrets the game of leapfrog
+            Is prohibited to girls.
+
+          I adore my Neighbor Nelly,
+            I invite her in to tea,
+          And I let her nurse the baby
+            Her delightful ways to see.
+          Such a darling bud of woman!
+            Yet remote from any teens;
+          I have learnt from Neighbor Nelly
+            What the girls' doll instinct means.
+
+          Oh! to see her with the baby!
+            (He adores her more than I);
+          How she choruses his crowing,
+            How she hushes every cry!
+          How she loves to pit his dimples
+            With her light forefinger deep;
+          How she boasts, as one in triumph,
+            When she gets him off to sleep!
+
+          We must part, my Neighbor Nelly,
+            For the summers quickly flee;
+          And the middle-aged admirer
+            Must, too soon, supplanted be.
+          Yet, as jealous as a mother,
+            A suspicious, cankered churl,
+          I look vainly for the setting,
+            To be worthy such a pearl!
+
+          NOTE.--This charming little gem is not original,
+          being gleaned from the pages of Putnam's Magazine.
+          As it was there published anonymously, the author
+          is unable to make any further acknowledgment.
+
+
+
+
+POSTSCRIPT TO THE THREE STORIES.
+
+BY THE OLD BACHELOR.
+
+
+WHEN I had finished copying out the stories of the Big Boy and the Fat
+Gentleman last summer, the thought struck me that, as I had been in town
+all the warm bright June weather, it would do my health a great deal of
+good to take a trip to Long Branch. Of course, it was not to see
+Neighbor Nelly--certainly not.
+
+So, the very next Saturday afternoon I dusted up my valise, and put some
+nice cool summer clothes in it, and a great paper of candy, which I
+meant for my little neighbors, in case I should see them by accident!
+Somebody had told me that the Mansion House was the best hotel to stop
+at. Shall I tell you why? Because there was a party there, of a papa and
+mamma, a dear little girl and boy, and a remarkably nice little toy
+terrier, which would put me in mind very much of some friends of mine
+called Lawson. In fact, this family was called Lawson, too, and the
+younger members were christened Nelly and Jimmy! Comical, wasn't it?
+
+If you have never been to Long Branch, you can't think what a pleasant
+sail it is down the Bay in the "Thomas Collyer," and how much I enjoyed
+my trip. The pleasant shores of Long and Staten Islands (_I_ used to
+live on Staten Island, and had some comical times there, which I mean to
+write out one of these days) looked as verdant and beautiful as ever;
+the sea was as blue as a bluebottle fly, and the sun as light as a cork!
+As I looked at the great, rolling waves, I laughed to myself, thinking
+what nice times we were going to have in bathing; ducking under them,
+when they came roaring along the shore after us, as if they meant to
+gobble us up, and bouncing out again when they had passed, all dripping
+and laughing, and ready for the next one to play the same trick on us.
+Sometimes, to be sure, the waves play too rough, and knock you off your
+feet without "by your leave;" or a little crab will walk up and bite
+your toes, just by way of welcoming you to Long Branch; but nobody minds
+it. Bless you!--that only makes it more fun to go in bathing!
+
+Well, the boat stopped at the pier, which extends a quarter of a mile
+from the shore, putting one in mind of a long crab's claw stuck out for
+"shake hands" by old Neptune; and I jumped into the cars and was bounced
+and rattled along to Long Branch. As it was Saturday afternoon, a great
+crowd of people were going there with me, and, deary me! when _I_ came
+to the Mansion House, there wasn't any room left for me! Wasn't it too
+bad? Just when I had fixed to have such a nice time with my dear little
+friends! It would never do to go away, however, so I said: "Well, never
+mind, Mr. Mansion House--that is, Mr. Neighbor Nelly--dear me!--Mr.
+Laird, I can do without a room; and at night you can put me to sleep in
+the pigeon house, or the hen coop, or under the counter of the office,
+or up the chimney, I don't care which; but go away I can't!"
+
+Now, I expect, Mr. Laird must have known I had come to see Neighbor
+Nelly, and what a disappointment it would be not to get in; for after a
+consultation with his bookkeeper, he told me he could give me a room
+after all! and I was so glad, that I offered him my snuff box
+immediately, which is a favor I only grant to very nice people!
+
+So up stairs I hurried, to get ready for tea, in high good humor, and,
+would you believe it, when I came down again, whose table should I be
+put to sit at, but Neighbor Nelly's? Oh, how surprised and pleased she
+was to see me! and Jimmy and his father and mother were just as glad.
+There was famous "clam chowder" for tea, and such great big
+blackberries, that we really had to make two bites of them! not to
+mention the quantities of other good things; and after tea we strolled
+out on the bluff, which overlooks the ocean. There are three pretty
+little summer houses before the Mansion House, and in one of these we
+took our seats. Gipsey had come scampering up to me in delighted
+recognition as we left the dining room, barking and wagging his tail,
+until I should think both his tail and his bark would have been quite
+out of joint.
+
+"Oh, Neighbor Oldbird, I'm so glad you have come," began Nelly, eagerly;
+"we have been having such fun, and, now you are here, it will be nicer
+than ever."
+
+"Do you and Jimmy go in bathing?" I asked.
+
+"I guess we do!" cried Jimmy. "We rush into the water first of anybody,
+and go out real deep, when we have hold of the ropes. Some great big
+boys are as afraid as anything! But we like to have the waves go over
+our heads."
+
+"Talking about big boys," said I, looking wonderfully sly, "I made the
+acquaintance of a big boy in our street, not long ago, who knows a
+certain little lady very well; and likes her very well, too!"
+
+"Oh, I know!" chimed both the children; "it's Tom Halstead. Isn't it?"
+
+"Yes; he told me something funny about you, too; I did not know you
+could wash windows before, Neighbor Nelly."
+
+My little neighbor laughed and blushed comically when I said that, and
+then Jimmy said:
+
+"He's a first rate fellow, I tell you. He sent us a letter the other
+day, and what do you think? he's coming here!"
+
+"Coming here!" I exclaimed; "my stars! I shall be quite thrown in the
+shade when such a nice friend makes his appearance. I think I shall have
+to go home again Monday, and I did mean to stay till Wednesday," and I
+made up a dismal face, and pretended to be quite heart-broken.
+
+"No, indeed, Neighbor Oldbird! we shall always like you the best!" cried
+Nelly, catching both my hands in hers. "He is a very nice boy, to be
+sure, but we like _you_ just as much as if you were our bachelor uncle."
+
+"Then I move to be called Uncle Josiah directly!" I said, laughing;
+"so, my dear niece and nephew, don't you think it would be a good plan
+for us to go down on that nice yellow sand there, and look at the
+waves?"
+
+The children were delighted with this plan, so we all three walked to
+the steep wooden steps that lead from the bluff to the beach below, and
+were soon on the sands. Gipsey came racing after as usual, and in his
+haste to join us, ran so fast down the steps, that he couldn't stop
+himself, but had to bring up on the sand past the water mark, looking
+comically astonished. To put a finishing touch to his misfortunes, a
+great big wave came tumbling in just then, and over poor Gipsey it went!
+sousing him head and ears! It frightened him so much that he rushed
+dripping wet to Neighbor Nelly, and jumped into her lap, squealing
+dismally. Such a perfect shower-bath of cold salt water as rained all
+over her pretty muslin dress, and trim little gaiters and stockings! We
+had to shake her well, and put Gipsey to bed on a sandhill near us,
+where he went to sleep, and, I hope, forgot his miseries.
+
+Perhaps you don't know it, but the sand is a famous place to write your
+name. You go as near the retreating wave as you dare, and then, with a
+walking stick or an umbrella, or your finger, if nothing better is to be
+had, write your name, or draw a hideous spook on the wet sand. You have
+to be quick about it, too; for just as you are putting the finishing
+touches to the work, another great billow is sure to come tearing at
+you, with a wide, deep hollow of emerald green, and foaming crest,
+looking like molten silver in the moonlight. Crash! it falls on the
+beach; and a long rush of foam slides up the sand as you scamper out of
+reach, not always without a wet shoe or two. Now the water has all run
+back, but where is the writing? The sand is smooth once more, and ready,
+like a great blackboard, to be marked on anew. So the sea is always
+clearing your writing book for you, and giving you a chance to begin
+again and see how long it will last!
+
+I should think we wrote "Nelly," "Jimmy," and "Neighbor Oldbird," about
+fifty times each on the sand, with my walking stick; and then we "hung
+Jeff. Davis on a sour apple tree," and depicted him with Old Spookey
+coming after him, and told the Atlantic Ocean, "We like blue fish," and
+"We're going in bathing Monday," and never succeeded in keeping one of
+our achievements more than half a minute.
+
+We stayed down on the delightful beach until nearly half-past nine; and,
+dear me, what a heap of sand we got in our shoes! It was quite wonderful
+how it contrived to work its way in; but there it was, making us lift up
+our feet as heavily as though we had cannon balls tied to our ankles.
+
+But it was getting late, and high time for small people to be off to
+bed; so, with a shake of the hand from one of my little neighbors, and a
+"good kiss" from the other, I don't say _which_, Gipsey was waked up,
+and they all trotted off together.
+
+Next morning was Sunday, and a beautiful sunshiny day. The first thing I
+did when I woke up, was to pop my head out of the window and take a look
+at the ocean. There it was, as beautiful as ever, and now I found out a
+funny thing about Long Branch that I hadn't noticed the evening before.
+"Why," said I, "is it possible I am in the country? Where are the
+trees?" They were nowhere to be seen, not so much as a bush; while the
+flowers were represented by everybody's bathing dresses hanging over
+all the fences, and on ever so many clothes-lines besides, to dry. The
+fact is, that the Atlantic Ocean is determined to let nothing be admired
+but itself; so it will not permit a tree to grow any nearer its shores
+than half a mile. So all the foliage there consists of the direful old
+bathing dresses, flapping in the wind and looking like so many
+scarecrows put up to frighten off the fishhawks.
+
+In the morning we went to the cunning little Episcopal church, and
+listened to the earnest teachings of the noble young rector, who is
+working so bravely in his Master's cause with such poor earthly reward.
+That he is laying up treasure where "neither moth nor rust doth
+corrupt," we cannot but believe. We did not like to leave the quiet
+little church for the great noisy hotels, in one of which, as we passed
+it, they were _playing billiards_. Oh! what an occupation for God's holy
+day! I cannot believe they were Christians who were playing, but I know
+I wanted to go and beg them to stop.
+
+In the afternoon it clouded up, and began to rain very hard; so we could
+not go to church, and as it was very little like Sunday in the crowded
+hall and parlor, Mrs. Lawson proposed we should all come and sit in her
+room, which opened on one of the upper piazzas. So we established
+ourselves here, where it was quiet and cool, very glad to escape from
+the bustle down stairs.
+
+"Suppose you were to repeat that pretty German hymn I gave you the other
+day," said her mother to Nelly. "Perhaps Mr. Oldbird would like to hear
+it."
+
+"Yes, that I should," I said; so Nelly began the beautiful verses
+called--
+
+
+"ALL THERE."
+
+          "Nothing is lost; the treasures which the ocean
+             Hath taken to itself in ages fled,
+           The lives that rest beneath its ceaseless motion
+             Until 'the sea shall render up its dead:'
+
+          "The dew drops that the warm bright sunshine drieth,
+             The cloud that melts away in summer air,
+           The bud that lifteth its sweet head--and dieth,
+             They are not lost--God keeps them in his care.
+
+          "Nothing is lost; the anguish of the mourner,
+            And bitter tears that fall like solemn rain,
+          Are safely stored within the heavenly garner,
+            Till Christ shall come unto his own again.
+
+          "And our beloved ones that Death doth gather
+             To their calm, dreamless sleep beneath the tomb,
+           Like tender flowers, are cherished by the Father
+             In the celestial fields of Heaven to bloom.
+
+          "Nothing is lost; oh, let the promise cheer us;
+             By God himself to weary mortals given;
+           Our darling ones shall soon again be near us,
+             Our hopes shall bloom, unfadingly, in Heaven."
+
+"I think that is the best hymn I know," added Nelly, when she had
+finished. "Now, what shall we do?"
+
+"Let's play church!" suggested Jimmy.
+
+"Oh yes! that's the very thing!" said Nelly. "Suppose we ask Kitty and
+Robby Morris to come in."
+
+So Kitty and Robby were found, and consented to join the play, which
+straightway began; mamma and I looking on, though we made believe not to
+be taking notice, for fear of disturbing the little visitors.
+
+Robby, who was a dear little fellow, only five years old, with long
+golden curls and great blue eyes, was the minister, at his own special
+request. The children dressed him in a long white sack of Mrs. Lawson's
+by way of a gown, and gave him a small table for a pulpit. The others,
+with Gipsey, and a large gray cat, the property of Robby and Kitty,
+which marched in after them, were the congregation, sitting on the edge
+of the bed, to be like the long church pew. The minister took for his
+text, "Little children, love one another," and his sermon was such a
+dear, funny little discourse, that I must write it down for you.
+
+"Now, my dear peoples," he said, "I hope, whenever you feel like
+karrelling,[A] or being as cross as bears, you will 'member what the
+Bible says 'bout loving one another. Gipsey fighted my tat to-day, and
+pulled some of her fur out; but he's only a dog, and I readed in my Dr.
+Watts--
+
+          "Let dogs delight to bark and bite,
+             For God has made 'em so;
+           Let bears and lions growl and fight,
+             For 'tis their nature too.
+           But, children, _you_ s'ould _never_ let
+             Your angry _pass'ons_ rise!
+           Your little hands were _never_ made
+             To sc'atch each other's eyes."
+
+----so I was not mad at him, 'cause he didn't _know_ he ought to love
+pussy.
+
+"I _s'apped_ nurse the other day, 'cause she made me come out of the
+water before I wanted to, and _that_ was _very_ naughty; I begged her
+pardon, though, and gave her a piece of my _tandy_, that papa had
+brought me. Now, my dear peoples, I think that is long enough. S'pose we
+sing, 'I want to be an angel.'"
+
+[Illustration: PLAYING CHURCH.]
+
+Wasn't that a cunning little sermon? It put me in mind of how I used to
+play church in my childhood, long ago; when my young brother, dear
+little Davy, would stand on a chair, while I sat on my stool at his
+feet, and preach a sermon something like Robby's. Darling Davy! I
+fancied I could see his sweet face and earnest eyes looking down at me,
+from his happy home in heaven that Sunday afternoon; for he closed those
+dark eyes on this weary earth many long years since, and I never think
+of him now but as standing on the chair in our father's study (with,
+perhaps, mother looking in, unknown to him), and preaching from some
+simple text that we knew and loved, in quaint, yet childish words. Ah,
+well! perhaps it was better so, than that he should have lived to be a
+gray-headed old bachelor like "brother Jose!"
+
+So the children all sang the hymn, and that was the end of church. We
+passed the rest of the afternoon telling Bible stories, and repeating
+hymns, and after tea it was clear once more, and dry enough to go out on
+the bluff.
+
+You may be sure, we were all in famous spirits Monday morning, and ready
+for any sort of a frolic. Who could help being good humored with such
+company as my little neighbors? Mr. Lawson left us in the first train
+for the city; but, to make up, who should have come down in the early
+morning boat, but Tom Halstead and Miss Elsie Bluejay--or Brandlaw, I
+ought to say, since I know her name now; and they drove straight up to
+the Mansion House, of course--who wouldn't, when Neighbor Nelly was
+there? The children received Tom with shouts of joy; and he looked so
+handsome and happy, and his great black eyes sparkled so with good humor
+and fun, that I felt quite ready to admit him into my circle of little
+people that I knew and loved. Neighbor Nelly and he were an admirable
+contrast in point of appearance, and I shouldn't be surprised if the
+last remark made to me in strict confidence, by my friend Tom in his
+account of her, should come true some day.
+
+I wish I could sketch a little picture of our party as we clustered
+together on the piazza, to show what manner of people we were then; and
+another, of our appearance in the water afterward. Ten o'clock was the
+hour for bathing that morning; so we each armed ourselves with our
+bathing clothes and a prodigious towel, like the main sail of a fishing
+smack, and rushed down to the beach; that is, the younger members; Aunt
+Elsie, Mrs. Lawson, and I walked soberly along. Then we popped into
+separate bathing houses, still looking like respectable and responsible
+members of society, and popped out five minutes afterward--scarecrows!
+spooks! animated rag-bags! with the last vestige of our gentility and
+good looks departed.
+
+Aunt Elsie had taken leave of a most beautiful brown "front" and
+fourteen luxuriant curls, the absence of which gave her an appearance
+very like a staid bald-headed owl; particularly as she would keep on her
+very round spectacles, and wore a pair of extremely long-fingered green
+cotton gloves. The long ends of the glove fingers, waving about in the
+water, were not unlike the owl's claws; while her gray woollen bathing
+dress might have passed for a new sort of flannel feathers. A mortified
+blue sunbonnet, with all the canes out, was perched lop-sided on her
+head, and she wore a pair of bathing shoes, like brown poultices. The
+rest of us were just as bad, though; I was an ogre in green flannel, Tom
+and Jimmy monkeys in red, Mrs. Lawson tolerably lady-like in blue, with
+white tape trimmings, and Neighbor Nelly a ridiculous little old jumping
+Jenny in white, with gorgeous red facings; and all in hats that defied
+our best friends to know us in.
+
+How we laughed at each other, and then made haste over the sand, which
+was so hot that it nearly scorched our feet, and plumped into the nice
+cool ocean, where ever so many other frights were already hopping about.
+
+Now for a rush into the deep water! here comes a big wave! down, down
+now! and over our heads it went! dousing us as it had Gipsey the
+Saturday night, only we didn't squeal.
+
+Presently, some people who had come from the next hotel, began dancing
+the "Lancers" in the water, ducking under instead of bowing, and
+seeming to have such a good time, that nothing would suit the children
+but that they must begin dancing, too; in consequence of which a wave
+twice as high as usual came roaring up, and carried Neighbor Nelly right
+off her feet. Under the water she went, and for an instant we were quite
+frightened; but presently up she popped laughing, and trying to squeeze
+the salt water out of her eyes.
+
+However, that put a stop to the dancing; and here let me tell you, that
+surf bathing is always a pretty venturesome thing to attempt, unless you
+grasp the ropes firmly, or have hold of some older and stronger person's
+hand.
+
+There was one gentleman flourishing about near us, who seemed bent upon
+trying how many odd things he could do in the water. Presently we saw
+him going down head first, and then his feet coming up in the air like a
+duck's! It looked so comical to see any one besides a duck standing
+upside down in the water, that we all burst out laughing, and just then
+along came another billow, and treated us each to a mouthful of salt
+water!
+
+By this time we had been in long enough for one day, for you should
+always remember to come out before you feel chilled, and so we waded to
+the shore, looking more outlandish than ever, now the bathing dresses
+were all soaked, and hurried into the houses to get dry and dressed.
+
+Surf bathing is a famous thing to give you an appetite; and I don't
+wonder Mr. Laird provides so bountiful and well cooked a dinner, when I
+think of the famishing five hundred people that were to be fed the day I
+was there, and every day beside. The "Charge of the Light Brigade" was
+nothing to the charge we made upon the dishes; and as the dining room is
+sensibly arranged with tables accommodating about a dozen people each,
+we all sat together; and had such a merry time that two or three cross
+old dames looked sharply at our party, very curious to know what all the
+laughing was about. Our small friend Gipsey was the cause of it, partly,
+for he posted himself beside each of our chairs in turn, and made such
+surprising and despairing hops and skips after bits of chicken held up
+beyond his reach, that he very nearly turned a somerset each time.
+
+We rewarded his patience at last by giving him some bones, which he
+crunched under the table with perfect satisfaction, while we were
+discussing the ice cream and other good things.
+
+In the afternoon I was sitting reading the paper on the upper piazza,
+and the children were amusing themselves in their own fashion near me.
+Nelly, with another little girl, whose name seemed to be "Baby," for
+they never called her anything else, were manufacturing a resplendent
+doll's dress for a waxen angel in a white spencer--or whatever those
+muslin concerns are called, which the ladies wear with colored skirts
+nowadays, and a black velvet pointed belt; while the boys, with their
+arms fraternally entwined, were interchanging confidences on the
+important subjects of "My peg top," "Don't you think thirty-eight cents
+is a tremendous price for kites?" "How many glass agates have you got?"
+and so on--when Tom, looking very mischievous, suddenly lifted up dolly
+by the toe of her shoe, and asked, "Why, Nelly, what's the matter with
+this doll; has she got the spinal complaint?"
+
+"No, you goose," said Nelly, laughing. "What makes you ask that?"
+
+"Because she has on a supporter," said Tom, with perfect gravity,
+pointing to the velvet belt. "Poor thing! why don't you take her in
+bathing? It would do her health good, I'm sure; she looks fearfully
+pale."
+
+"Ah, make him put her down, Nelly," said Baby; "he'll break her if he
+goes on so;" for Tom was now amusing himself by balancing dolly on her
+head in his hand, making a great display of embroidered trowsers and
+hoop petticoats; and now, catching her by both hands, he suddenly swung
+her over the railing. "This is the way she ought to be ducked under the
+waves!" he added. Nelly sprang forward at the same moment with an "Oh,
+Tom! please!" and caught his arm rather suddenly. His hold relaxed at
+the same moment, and crash! down tumbled poor dolly on the ground below,
+breaking one of her wax arms completely off, and making a fearful cavity
+in her forehead, which killed her completely! that is, I should think
+so. I never heard of any one who survived fracture of the skull. Did
+you?
+
+Poor Nelly! She tried hard not to mind it; but dolly's head was one too
+many for her, and the tears came rolling quickly down her cheeks as she
+gazed at the unfortunate waxen damsel below, with quivering lip. Tom
+turned red and white alternately in silence for a moment, and then began
+pouring forth apologies and regrets. He called himself all the imps
+that ever were heard of for being so careless; he offered to go to New
+York that very day to buy another doll, and have his hair well pulled
+beside, if she only would forgive him, and say she didn't think he had
+done it on purpose; and, in short, we had quite a little scene; when,
+fortunately, there occurred to me a pleasant means of diverting the
+minds of the party from the accident that had happened. So I laid down
+my paper, as though I had not been listening, and said:
+
+"Well, little people, I believe I have discovered all the news there is;
+so what do you say to coming to a party I am thinking of giving in my
+room?"
+
+"A party!" cried the children, dropping the subject of the doll to look
+at me; "why, we should like that very much. What sort of a party is it?"
+
+"A reading party," I answered. "I have some papers I have been thinking
+of reading to you, to get your opinion of them before I put them in a
+book; and I shouldn't be surprised if there was a paper of candy in my
+drawer besides."
+
+"Why, do you write books?" asked Baby, opening her bright eyes very wide
+indeed, as if to be certain what a real live author looked like.
+
+"To be sure I do," I said, laughing. "Funny stories, and sad ones, too;
+and some that are every word of them true, and others that are told me
+by my friends; and you shall tell me whether they are true or not."
+
+So we all made haste into my room--not the same I had when I first came,
+but one on the front piazza, near Neighbor Nelly's. The papers I meant
+were my own, Tom's, and the Fat Gentleman's stories, which I had brought
+down with me, to look over and correct. The candy I had bought for Nelly
+and Jimmy, as I told you, and forgotten all about to that moment. Little
+Robby came trotting along just then, so we asked him to be of the party;
+and Mrs. Lawson, looking out to see why we were in such a bustle, made
+up the company.
+
+I wish you could have been at Our Party that afternoon. We made a cosey
+little group, I assure you. Mrs. Lawson sat by the table with her
+sewing; Tom established himself close to my chair, and Nelly nestled by
+my other side. Baby and Jimmy sat on hassocks, contrived from carpet
+bags, at my feet; dear little Robby was lifted to my knee, and the
+reading began. Oh, the laughter, and comical wonder, and blushes, when
+my little neighbors found the stories were about them! Nelly burst out
+with "Oh, Neighbor Oldbird!" and hid her face on my shoulder every time
+there was some special praise of herself. Tom turned perfectly crimson
+when we came to his story, and was in and out of his seat twenty times,
+begging me to stop, during its progress, his splendid black eyes
+glancing appealingly at me and Nelly by turns. I wouldn't spare him a
+single word, however; and when I came to his declaration at the end,
+concerning Nelly, there was a general shout of laughter.
+
+"There's an eligible offer for you, Miss Nell," I said solemnly. "You'd
+better take it into consideration!" and so on, until Mrs. Lawson begged
+me to stop. She did not like to have ideas about marriage put into the
+children's heads; and I, when I reflected, was very sorry I had been so
+thoughtless. Tom bore my teasing manfully; but Nelly's face was rather
+grave, as if she did not like such remarks to be made about her; so I
+hurried on to the Fat Gentleman's story, and brought up at the end, and
+then handed round the candy, amid general approbation.
+
+How we all passed that evening together on the beach, and had a wildly
+happy time; how we went in bathing the next day, and the next; and how,
+on Wednesday afternoon, I bid a most reluctant good-by to my little
+neighbors, I have not room to tell. I want to write how gladly we met
+again in the city in the fall; how Tom did come to live in New York, and
+favored us with his company as often as possible; how we chanced again
+on the little girl whom we had met in the toy shop, and found her living
+in a wretched tenement house in Cherry street, whence Mr. Lawson and I,
+with some other friends, removed them in haste, and established them in
+a nice little thread-needle store on one of the business avenues not far
+from our street; but all this would take too long.
+
+I must say, though, what a blessed change it has been for them,
+particularly for poor little crippled Clara, who never fails to greet us
+with a smile when we go there to see her, as she sits in her comfortable
+arm-chair by the window, with her pet spaniel "Dandy" beside her. She is
+always contented and cheerful, in spite of the sharp pain that often
+racks her slender limbs; and as I look on her pale face, which is so
+plainly not long for this earth, and think that now her suffering life
+will end amid comfort and peace, I whisper to myself with a heart full
+of love, "All this through thy sweet influence, dear
+
+                        "NEIGHBOR NELLY!"
+
+FOOTNOTE:
+
+[A] Quarrelling.
+
+
+
+
+CONCLUSION.
+
+
+AND that was the end of the famous Sock Stories, which had afforded
+George and Helen so much amusement during nearly three months; for it
+took all that time for Aunt Fanny's daughter to write, and the children
+to read them all. They could not tell which they liked the best; for it
+so happened that the "Funny Little Socks" made their appearance just at
+the time when some dear little cousins of theirs, only four or five
+years old, had come to spend a week or two with them, which made baby
+stories doubly welcome; and I don't know what the good and delightful
+gentleman to whom the fifth book is dedicated will say about it, when he
+sees his name at the front; but it was thought very appropriate by
+Helen's papa; as the very best story in the book is all about
+philosophers, grave and gay.
+
+One thing in particular I am most happy to record; and that is, that the
+good habits which keeping mamma's little code of rules had engendered,
+were not broken off at the close of the readings; but instead, were
+formed more lastingly with every week; until now every one who knows
+George and Helen says, the first thing, "What good children they are!
+and yet, they never have to be whipped, or shut up in a dark closet to
+make them so." No! they are good from a higher motive than the dread of
+punishment; for they are inspired with the sincere desire to make their
+dear mother as happy as they can; and it would not surprise me at all if
+Santa Claus, who is a very discerning old gentleman, were to put
+something very nice indeed in both socks and stockings this
+Christmas--in spite of the hard times!
+
+And now, one last word, before Aunt Fanny's daughter bids you good-by,
+little reader. She hopes and prays, in all sincerity, that she has
+succeeded not only in amusing you, but in giving you some lessons which
+will sink into your hearts for your real good. And if in the shadowy
+train of personages who have moved before you in these Sock Stories,
+there is one who has pleased you especially, from Colonel Freddy and
+little tender-hearted Greta, to Little Mother and the Old Bachelor,
+Neighbor Nelly, with her bright eyes and merry ways, or Gipsey, of the
+cork-screw tail and yap! yap! bark, the knowledge of this fact will give
+_her_ what she wishes for you all, a very
+
+                           MERRY CHRISTMAS!
+
+
+          THE END OF THE SIXTH AND LAST BOOK.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Transcriber's Notes:
+
+Page 026, "anx" changed to "any" (him any more)
+
+Page 32, "eat" changed to "ate" (We ate the)
+
+Page 086, "found" changed to "fond" (fond of tops and marbles)
+
+Page 126, "copmany" changed to "company" (made up the company)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Neighbor Nelly Socks, by Sarah L. Barrow
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