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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Secret Memoirs: The Story of Louise, Crown
+Princess, by Henry W. Fischer
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Secret Memoirs: The Story of Louise, Crown Princess
+
+Author: Henry W. Fischer
+
+Release Date: June 19, 2009 [EBook #29167]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SECRET MEMOIRS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Barbara Tozier, Jane Hyland, Bill Tozier and
+the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at
+http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+Secret Memoirs
+
+THE COURT OF ROYAL SAXONY
+
+1891-1902
+
+This edition, printed on Japanese vellum paper, is limited to two
+hundred and fifty copies.
+
+No. ________
+
+
+
+[Illustration: LOUISE, EX-CROWN-PRINCESS OF SAXONY
+
+Photo taken shortly before her flight from Dresden]
+
+Secret Memoirs
+
+THE COURT OF ROYAL SAXONY 1891-1902
+
+THE STORY OF LOUISE CROWN PRINCESS
+
+FROM THE PAGES OF HER DIARY, LOST AT THE TIME OF HER ELOPEMENT FROM
+DRESDEN WITH M. ANDRE ("RICHARD") GIRON
+
+BY HENRY W. FISCHER
+
+Author of "Private Lives of William II and His Consort," "Secret History
+of the Court of Berlin," etc., etc.
+
+Illustrated from Photographs
+
+BENSONHURST, NEW YORK FISCHER'S FOREIGN LETTERS, INC. PUBLISHERS
+
+COPYRIGHT, 1912
+BY HENRY W. FISCHER
+
+Copyright, 1912, applied for by Henry W. Fischer in Great Britain
+
+Copyright, 1912, by Henry W. Fischer, in Germany, France, Austria,
+Switzerland, and all foreign countries having international copyright
+arrangements with the United States
+
+[_All rights reserved, including those of translation_]
+
+
+
+
+EDITOR'S CARD
+
+
+This is to certify that the Ex-Crown Princess of Saxony, now called
+Countess Montiguoso, Madame Toselli by her married name, is in no way,
+either directly or indirectly, interested in this publication.
+
+There has been no communication of whatever nature, directly or through
+a third party, between this lady and the editor or publishers. In fact,
+the publication will be as much a surprise to her as to the general
+public.
+
+The Royal Court of Saxony, therefore, has no right to claim, on the
+ground of this publication, that Princess Louise violated her agreement
+with that court as set forth in the chapter on the _Kith and Kin of the
+ex-Crown Princess of Saxony_, under the heads of "_Louise's Alimony and
+Conditions_" and "_Allowance Raised and a Further Threat_."
+
+    HENRY W. FISCHER, _Editor_.
+    Fischer's Foreign Letters, Publishers
+
+
+
+
+THIS BOOK AND ITS PURPOSE
+
+By Henry W. Fischer
+
+
+Of Memoirs that are truly faithful records of royal lives, we have a
+few; the late Queen Victoria led the small number of crowned
+autobiographists only to discourage the reading of self-satisfied royal
+ego-portrayals forever, but in the Story of Louise of Saxony we have the
+main life epoch of a Cyprian Royal, who had no inducement to say
+anything false and is not afraid to say anything true.
+
+For the Saxon Louise wrote not to guide the hand of future official
+historiographers, or to make virtue distasteful to some sixty odd
+grand-children, bored to death by the recital of the late "Mrs. John
+Brown's" sublime goodness:--Louise wrote for her own amusement, even as
+Pepys did when he diarized the peccadilloes of the Second Charles'
+English and French "hures" (which is the estimate these ladies put upon
+themselves).[1]
+
+The ex-Crown Princess of Saxony suffered much in her youth by a
+narrow-minded, bigoted mother, a Sadist like the monstrous Torquemada;
+marriage, she imagined, spelled a rich husband, more lover than master;
+freedom from tyranny, paltry surroundings, interference. To her
+untutored mind, life at the Saxon Court meant right royal splendor,
+liberty to do as one pleases, the companionship of agreeable, amusing
+and ready-to-serve friends.
+
+
+_The Sad Saxon Court_
+
+Her experience? Instead of the Imperial mother who took delight in
+cutting her children's faces with diamonds and exposing her daughters to
+the foul machinations of worthless teachers--she acquired a
+father-in-law (Prince, afterwards King George) whose pretended affection
+was but a share of his all-encompassing hatred, whose breath was a
+serpent's, whose veins were flowing with gall; the supposed
+chevaleresque husband turned out a walking dictionary of petty
+indecencies and gross vulgarities when in a favorable mood, a brawler at
+other times, a coward always.
+
+As to money--Louise wished for nothing better "than to be an American
+multi-millionaire's daughter for a week"! Amusements were few and
+frowned upon.
+
+Liberty? None outside of a general permit to eat, drink and couple like
+animals in pasture, was recognized or tolerated. Nor could the royal
+young woman make friends. Her relatives-by-marriage were mostly freaks,
+and all were unbearable; her entourage a collection of spies and
+flunkeys.
+
+If charity-bazaars, pious palaver, and orphaned babies' diapers had not
+been the sole topic of conversation at court; if there had been
+intellectual enjoyment of any kind, Louise might never have taken up
+her pen. As it was: "This Diary is intended to contain my innermost
+thoughts, my ambitions, my promises for the future, _Myself_. * * *
+These pages are my Father-Confessor. I confess to myself. * * * And as I
+start in writing letters to myself, it occurs to me that my worse self
+may be corresponding with my better self, or vice-versa."
+
+At any rate she thinks "this Diary business will be quite amusing."
+
+
+_Louise's Amusing Writings_
+
+It is. The world always laughs at the--husband of a woman whose history
+isn't one long yawn.
+
+Nor is Louise content with a bust picture.[2] She gives full length
+portraits of herself, family, friends, enemies, and lovers, which latter
+she picks hap-hazard among commoners and the nobility. Only one of them
+was a prince of the blood, and he promptly proved the most false and
+dishonorable of the lot.
+
+When Louise's pen-pictures do not deal with her _amororos_, they focus
+invariably emperors and princes, kings and queens,--contemporary
+personages whose acquaintance, by way of the newspapers and magazines,
+we all enjoy to the full, as "stern rulers," "sacrificers to the public
+weal," "martyrs of duty," "indefatigable workers," "examples of
+abstinence," and "high-mindedness"--everything calculated to make life a
+burden to the ordinary mortal.
+
+
+_Kings in Fiction and in Reality_
+
+But kings and emperors, we are told by these _distant_ observers, are
+built that way; they would not be happy unless they made themselves
+unhappy for their people's sake. And as to queens and empresses,--they
+simply couldn't live if they didn't inspect their linen closets daily,
+stand over a broiling cook-stove, or knit socks for the offspring of
+inebriated bricklayers "and sich."
+
+Witness Louise, Imperial and Royal Highness, Archduchess of Austria,
+Princess of Hungary and Tuscany, Crown Princess of Saxony, etc., etc.,
+smash these paper records of infallible royal rectitude, and superhuman,
+almost inhuman, royal probity!
+
+Had she castigated her own kind _after_ royalty unkenneled her, neck and
+crop, her story might admit of doubt, but she wrote these things while
+in the full enjoyment of her rank and station, before her title as
+future queen was ever questioned or menaced.
+
+Her Diary finishes with her last night in the Dresden palace. We do not
+hear so much as the clatter of the carriage wheels that carried her and
+"Richard" to her unfrocking as princess of the blood,--in short, our
+narrator is not prejudiced, on the defensive, or soured by
+disfranchisement. She had no axes to grind while writing; for her all
+kings dropped out of the clouds; the lustre that surrounds a king never
+dimmed while her Diary was in progress, and before she ceases talking to
+us she never "ate of the fish that hath fed of that worm that hath eat
+of a king."
+
+Yet this large folio edition of _obscenites royale_, chock full, at the
+same time, of intensely human and interesting facts, notable and amusing
+things, as enthralling as a novel by Balzac,--Louise's life record in
+sum and substance, since her carryings-on _after_ she doffed her royal
+robes for the motley of the free woman are of no historical, and but
+scant human interest.
+
+The prodigality of the mass of indictments Louise launches against
+royalty as every-day occurrences, reminds one of the great Catharine
+Sforza, Duchess of Milan's clever _mot_. When the enemy captured her
+children she merely said, "I retain the oven for more."
+
+
+_Royal Scandals_
+
+Such scandalmongering! Only Her Imperial Highness doesn't see the
+obloquy,--sarcasm, cynicism and disparagement being royalty's every-day
+diet.
+
+Such gossiping! But what else was there to do at a court whose
+literature is tracts and whose theatre of action the drill grounds.
+
+But for all that, Louise's Diary is history, because its minute things
+loom big in connection with social and political results, even as its
+horrors and abnormalities help paint court life and the lives of kings
+and princes as they _are_, not as royalties' sycophants and apologizers
+would have us view them.
+
+There is a perfect downpour of books eulogizing monarchs and monarchy;
+royal governments spend millions of the people's money to uphold and
+aggrandize exalted kingship and seedy princeship alike; three-fourths of
+the press of Europe is swayed by king-worship, or subsidized to sing the
+praises of "God's Anointed," while in our own country the aping of
+monarchical institutions, the admiration for court life, the
+idealization of kings, their sayings, doings and pretended superiority,
+as carried on by the multi-rich, are undermining love for the Republic
+and the institutions our fathers fought and bled for.
+
+
+_Un-American Folly_
+
+It's the purpose of the present volume to show the guilty folly of such
+un-American, un-republican, wholly unjustifiable, reprehensible and
+altogether ridiculous King-worship, not by argument, or a more or less
+fanciful story, but by the unbiased testimony of an "insider."
+
+Let it be considered, above all, that a member of the proudest Imperial
+family in the wide, wide world demonstrates, by inference, the absurdity
+of King-worship!
+
+Of course, whether or not you'll obey the impassioned appeal of the
+corner sermonizer, who, espying a number of very decolletee ladies
+passing by in a carriage, cried out: "_Quand vous voyez ces tetons
+rebondies, qui se montrent avec tant d'impudence, bandez! bandez!
+bandez! vous--les yeux!_" is a matter for you to decide.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Seek not for descriptions of ceremonials and festivities in these pages;
+only imbeciles among kings are interested in such wearying spectacles,
+intended to dazzle the multitude. The Czar Paul, who became insane and
+had his head knocked off by his own officers, appeared upon the scene
+vacated by his brilliant mother, Catharine the Great, with a valise full
+of petty regulations, ready drawn up, by which, every day, every hour,
+every minute, he announced some foolish change, punishment or favor, but
+I often saw Kaiser Wilhelm and other kings look intensely bored and
+disgusted when obliged to attend dull and superfluous court or
+government functions.
+
+
+_Royalty's Loose Talk_
+
+But for genuine expressions of the royal self consult Louise. Those who
+think that royalty shapes its language in accordance with the plural of
+the personal pronoun, sometimes used in state papers, will be shocked at
+the "neglige talk" of one royal highness and the "rag-time" expressions
+of others. Louise, herself, assures us over and over again that she
+"_feels like a dog_," a statement no self-respecting publisher's reader
+would allow to pass, yet I was told by a friend of King Frederick of
+Denmark that he loved to compare his "all-highest person" to a "_mut_,"
+and I remember a letter from Victor Emanuel II to his great Minister,
+Count Cavour, solemnly protesting that he (the King) was "_no ass_."
+
+When the same Danish ruler, the seventh of his name, was asked why, in
+thunder, he married a common street walker (the Rasmussen, afterwards
+created Countess Danner), he cried out with every indication of gusto:
+"You don't know how deliciously common that girl is."
+
+Frederick's words explain the hostler marriages of several royal women
+mentioned by Louise, as well as her own and loving family's
+_broulleries_ of the fish-wife order, repeatedly described in the Diary.
+
+
+_Royalty Threatens a Royal Woman_
+
+It is safe to say that few $15 flats in all the United States witnessed
+more outrageous family jars than were fought out in the gilded halls of
+the Dresden palace between Louise and father-in-law and Louise and
+husband. Threats of violence are frequent; Prince George promises his
+daughter-in-law a sound beating at the hands of the Crown Prince and the
+Crown Princess confesses that she would rather go to bed with a drunken
+husband, booted and spurred, than risk a sword thrust.
+
+At the coronation of the present Czar, at Moscow, I mistook the Duke of
+Edinburgh, brother of the late King Edward, for a policeman attached to
+the British Ambassador, so exceedingly commonplace a person in
+appearance, speech and manner he seemed; Louise has a telling chapter on
+the mean looks of royalty, but fails to see the connection between that
+and royalty's coarseness.
+
+Perhaps it wasn't the "commonness" of Lady Emma Hamilton, child of the
+slums, impersonator of _risque_ stage pictures, and mistress of the
+greatest naval hero of all times, that appealed primarily to Louise's
+grand-aunt, Queen Caroline of Naples, but the abandon of the beautiful
+Englishwoman, her reckless exposure of person, her freedom of speech,
+certainly sealed the friendship between the adventuress and the despotic
+ruler who deserved the epithet of "bloody" no less than Mary of England.
+
+
+_Covetous Royalty_
+
+Royal covetousness is another subject dwelt on by Louise. We learn that
+in money matters the kings and princes of her acquaintance--and her
+acquaintance embraces all the monarchs of Europe--are "dirty," that
+royal girls are given in marriage to the highest bidder, and that poor
+princes have no more chance to marry a rich princess than a drayman an
+American multi-millionaire's daughter.
+
+Louise gives us a curious insight into the Pappenheim-Wheeler marriage
+embroglio, and refers to some noble families that made their money in
+infamous trades; that the Kaiser adopted the title of one of these
+unspeakables ("Count of Henneberg") she doesn't seem to know.
+
+We hear of imperial and royal highnesses, living at public expense and
+for whom honors and lucrative employment are exacted from the people,
+who at home figure as poor relations, obliged to submit to treatment
+that a self-respecting "boots" or "omnibus" would resent.
+
+Here we have a royal prince of twenty-four or twenty-five subjected to
+kicks and cuffs by his uncle, who happens to be king--no indignity
+either to the slugged or the slugger in that--but when a pretty princess
+gets a few "_Hochs_" more than an ugly, mouse-colored majesty, she is
+all but flayed for "playing to the gallery."
+
+"High-minded" royalty robs widows and despoils orphans; re-introduces
+into the family obsolete punishments forbidden by law; maintains in the
+household a despicable spy system! Its respect for womanhood is on a par
+with a Bushman's; of authors, "lickspittles" only count; literature,
+unless it kowtows to the "all-highest" person, is the "trade of Jew
+scribblers."
+
+
+_Right Royal Manners_
+
+As to manners, what do you think of kings and princes and grand-dukes
+who, at ceremonial dinners, pound the table to "show that they are
+boss"?
+
+Louise tells of an emperor at a foreign court ignoring one of his
+hostesses absolutely, even refusing to acknowledge her salute by a nod.
+We hear of expectant royal heirs who engage in wild fandangoes of
+merriment while their father, brother or cousin lies dying.
+
+"Personal matter," you say? "A typical case," I retort.
+
+"Ask the _Duc du_ Maine to wait till I am dead before he indulges in the
+full extent of his joy," said the dying Louis XIV, when the _De
+Profundis_ in the death chamber was suddenly interrupted by the sound of
+violent laughter from the adjoining gallery. And the fact that almost
+every new king sets aside the testament of his predecessor,--is this not
+evidence of the general callowness of feeling prevailing in royal
+circles?
+
+
+_The Irish Famine and Royalty_
+
+In famine times, the kings and princes of old drove the starving out of
+town to die of hunger in the fields, and as late as 1772 one hundred and
+fifty thousand Saxons died of hunger under the "glorious reign" of
+Louise's grandfather-by-marriage, Frederick Augustus III. And the "Life
+of Queen Victoria," approved by the Court of St. James, unblushingly
+informs us that in 1847 "Her Most Gracious Majesty" was chiefly
+concerned about investing to good profit the revenues of the Prince of
+Wales, her infant son (about four hundred thousand dollars per annum).
+
+Yet, while Victoria pinched the boy's tenants to extort an extra penny
+for him, and "succeeded in saving all but four thousand pounds sterling"
+of his imperial allowance, the population of Ireland was reduced two
+millions by the most dreadful famine the world remembers!
+
+Before the famine Ireland had a population of 8,196,597, against a
+population of 15,914,148 in England and Wales, while Scotland's
+population was 2,620,184.
+
+Six years after the famine Ireland's population was 6,574,278,
+Scotland's 2,888,742, England and Wales' 17,927,609. Today Ireland's
+population is less than Scotland's, the exact figures being: Scotland
+4,759,445, Ireland 4,381,951, England and Wales 36,075,269.
+
+
+_Royalty Utterly Heartless_
+
+However, as the waste of two million human lives, the loss of four
+millions in population, subsequently enabled the Prince of Wales to tie
+the price of a dukedom[3] in diamonds around a French dancer's neck and
+to support a hundred silly harlots in all parts of Europe, who cares?
+
+According to Louise and--others, royalty is the meanest, the most
+heartless, the most faithless and the most unjust of the species--that
+in addition she herself disgraced its womanhood, after the famous Louise
+of Prussia rehabilitated queenship, is regrettable, but to call it
+altogether unexpected would be rank euphemism.
+
+
+_Louise's Character_
+
+If Louise had lived at the time of Phryne, the philosophers would have
+characterized her as "an animal with long hair"; if he had known her,
+the great Mirabeau might have coined his pet phrase, "a human that
+dresses, undresses and--talks" (or writes) for Louise; as a matter of
+fact, she is one of those "_Jansenists_" of love who believe in the
+utter helplessness of natural woman to turn down a good looking man.
+
+Her great grand-uncle, Emperor Francis, recorded on a pane of glass
+overlooking the courtyard of the Vienna _Hofburg_ his opinion of women
+in the brief observation: "_Chaque femme varie_" (Women always change).
+
+This is true of Louise and also untrue of her. While occupying her high
+position at the Saxon court she was fixed in the determination to make a
+cuckold of her husband, though Frederick Augustus, while a pumpkin,
+wasn't fricasseed in snow by any means.
+
+The process gave her palpitations, but, like Ninon, she was "_so_ happy
+when she had palpitations."
+
+
+_Changed Lovers Frequently_
+
+As to lovers, she changed them as often as she had to, never hesitating
+to pepper her _steady_ romances by playing "everybody's wife," chance
+permitting, as she intimates naively towards the close of the Diary.
+
+Qualms of conscience she knows not, but of pride of ancestry, of
+insistence on royal prerogatives, she has plenty and to spare.
+
+"My great grand-aunt, Marie Antoinette, did this"; "my good cousins
+d'Orleans" (three of them) "allowed themselves to be seduced"; "_ma
+cousine de_ Saxe-Coburg laughs at conventionalities,"--there you have
+the foundation of the iniquitous philosophy of the royal Lais. And for
+the rest--when she is queen, all will be well.
+
+
+_Her Court--A Seraglio_
+
+Louise's fixed idea was that, as Queen of Saxony, she had but to say the
+word to establish a court _a la_ Catharine II; time and again she refers
+to the great Empress's male seraglio, and to the enormous sums she
+squandered on her favorites. If the Diarist had known that Her Majesty
+of Russia, when in the flesh, never suffered to be longer than
+twenty-four hours without a lover, Louise, no doubt, would have made the
+most elaborate plans to prevent, in her own case, a possible
+_interregnum_ of five minutes even.
+
+She thought she held the whip hand because a king cannot produce princes
+without his wife, while the wife can produce princes without the king;
+besides Frederick Augustus was no paragon, and he who plants horns, must
+not grudge to wear them.
+
+A wanton's calculations, it will be argued,--but Louise's records show
+that her husband, the king-to-be, fell in with her main idea,--that he
+forgave the unfaithful wife, the disgraced princess, because, as Queen,
+her popularity would be "a great asset."
+
+And Americans, our women of whom we are so proud, are asked to bow down
+to such sorry majesties!
+
+
+_Sired and "Cousined" by Lunatics_
+
+And is there no excuse for so much baseness in high places? Our royal
+Diarist offers none, but her family history is a telling apology.
+
+Be it remembered that Louise is not so much an Austrian as a
+Wittelsbacher of the royal house of Bavaria that gave to the world two
+mad kings, Louis II and Otho, the present incumbent of the throne,
+besides a number of eccentrics, among others Louise's aunts, the Empress
+Elizabeth and the Duchess d'Alencon, both dead; Crown Prince Rudolph of
+Austria, her cousin, was also undoubtedly insane, the result of breeding
+in and in, Austrian, Bourbon and Wittelsbach stock, all practically of
+the same parentage, in a mad mix-up, the insane Wittelsbachers
+predominating.
+
+To cap the climax, Louise has eighteen or nineteen insane cousins on her
+mother's side!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Once upon a time Louise's prosaic and stupid great-uncle, as a young
+husband, felt dreadfully scandalized when his Queen, Marie Antoinette,
+bombarded him with spit-balls.
+
+"What can I do with her?" he asked "Minister Sans-culotte" Dumouriez.
+
+"I would spike the cannon, Sire," replied the courtier.
+
+"_Enclouer le canon_," if performed in time, might have saved Louise,
+but I doubt it.
+
+    HENRY W. FISCHER.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 1: "Be civil, good people, I am the English hure," said Nell
+Gwyn, addressing a London mob that threatened to storm her carriage,
+assuming that its occupant was the hated Frenchwoman.]
+
+[Footnote 2: "Your biography give a faithful portrait of self," said
+Fontenelle, the famous French Academician, to an 18th Century Marquise,
+"but I miss the record of your gallantries."
+
+"_Ah, Monsieur, c'est que je ne me suis peinte qu'en buste!_" replied
+her ladyship.]
+
+[Footnote 3: The Prince of Wales' revenue is derived from the Duchy of
+Cornwall, amounting to about half a million dollars per year.]
+
+
+
+
+KITH AND KIN OF THE EX-CROWN PRINCESS OF SAXONY
+
+
+_Louise's Own Family_
+
+The royal woman whose life's history is recorded in this volume was born
+Louise Antoinette, Daughter of the late Grand Duke Ferdinand IV of
+Tuscany (died January 17, 1908) and the Dowager Grand Duchess Alice,
+_nee_ Princess Bourbon of Parma.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Louise has four brothers, among them the present head of the Tuscany
+family, Joseph Ferdinand, who dropped the obsolete title of Grand Duke
+and is officially known as Archduke of Austria-Hungary.
+
+He is a brigadier general, commanding the Fifth Austrian Infantry, and
+unmarried.
+
+Better known is Louise's older brother, the former Archduke Leopold, who
+dropped his title and dignities, and, as a Swiss citizen, adopted the
+name of Leopold Wulfling. This Leopold is generally regarded as a black
+sheep.
+
+Louise more often refers to him in the present volume than to any other
+member of her family.
+
+He is now a commoner by his own, more or less enforced, abdication, as
+Louise is a commoner by decree of her chief-of-family, the Austrian
+Emperor, Francis Joseph, dated Vienna, January 27, 1903.
+
+A month before above date the Saxon court had conferred on Louise the
+title of Countess Montiguoso, while, on her own part, she adopted the
+fanciful cognomen of Louise of Tuscany.
+
+Of Louise's two remaining brothers, one, Archduke Peter, serves in the
+Austrian army as Colonel of the Thirty-second Infantry, while Archduke
+Henry is Master of Horse in the Sixth Bavarian Dragoons.
+
+Only one of Louise's four sisters is married, the oldest, Anna, now
+Princess Johannes of Hohenlohe-Bartenstein.
+
+The unmarried sisters are Archduchesses Margareta (31 years old),
+Germana (28 years old), Agnes (22 years old).
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Mother Comes of Mentally Tainted Stock_
+
+Louise's mother, _nee_ Princess Alice of Parma, is the only surviving
+sister of the late Duke Robert, who left twenty children, all living,
+and of whom eighteen or nineteen are either imbeciles or raving
+lunatics, the present head of the house, Duke Henry, belonging to the
+first category of mentally unsound.
+
+Louise's first cousin, Prince Elias of Parma, the seventh son, is
+accounted sound, but Elias's sister, Zita (the twelfth child), developed
+maniacal tendencies since her marriage to Archduke Karl Francis Joseph,
+heir-presumptive to the crown of Austria-Hungary.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Francis Joseph's Autocratic Rule_
+
+_Louise Formerly in Line of Austrian Succession_
+
+Louise was in the line of the Austrian succession until, upon her
+marriage to the Crown Prince of Saxony (1891), she officially renounced
+her birthrights.
+
+Emperor Francis Joseph of Austria-Hungary is Louise's grand-uncle as
+well as chief of the imperial family of Austria, the royal family of
+Hungary, the Grand-ducal family of Tuscany (now extinct as far as the
+title goes), and of the Estes, which is the Ducal Line of Modena,
+extinct in the male line. Finally he is recognized as chief by the ducal
+family of Parma, descendants of the Spanish Hapsburgs.
+
+Emperor Francis Joseph rules all the Hapsburgers, Austrian, Hungarian,
+and those of Tuscany, of Este, of Modena and Parma, autocratically, his
+word being law in the family. Even titles conferred by birth can be
+taken away by him, as exemplified in the case of Louise and her brother
+Leopold.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Royal Saxons_
+
+As a member of the Austrian imperial family, the Hapsburgers, founded in
+883, Louise ranked higher than her husband, the Crown Prince of the
+petty Kingdom of Saxony, whose claim to the royal title dates from
+1806,--a gift of the Emperor Napoleon.
+
+She married Frederick Augustus November 21, 1891, while the latter's
+uncle reigned as King Albert of Saxony (1873 to 1902).
+
+Louise's father-in-law, up to then known as Prince George, succeeded his
+brother June 19, 1902. He was then a widower and his family consisted
+of:
+
+Princess Mathilde, unmarried,
+
+The Crown Prince Frederick Augustus, husband of Louise,
+
+Princess Marie-Josepha, wife of Archduke Otho of Austria,
+
+Prince Johann George, at that time married to Isabelle of Wuerttemberg,
+and
+
+Prince Max. The latter subsequently shelved his title and entered the
+Church July 26, 1896. He is a professor of canonical law and slated for
+a German bishopric.
+
+At the time of Prince George's ascension, there was also living the late
+King Albert's widow, Queen Caroline, _nee_ Princess of Wasa, since
+dead.
+
+The Marchesa Rapallo, _nee_ Princess Elizabeth of Saxony, is a sister of
+the late King George.
+
+
+_Louise and Her Father-in-Law_
+
+During King George's short reign, Louise ran away from the Saxon court,
+end of November, 1902.
+
+On February 11, 1903, divorce was pronounced against her by a special
+court assembled by King George.
+
+Louise was adjudged the guilty party and deprived of the name and style
+of Crown Princess of Saxony. As previously (January 27) the Austrian
+Emperor had forbidden her to use the name and title of Austrian
+Archduchess and Imperial and royal Princess, Louise would have been
+nameless but for the rank and title of Countess Montiguoso, conferred
+upon her by King George.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Louise's Alimony Conditional_
+
+At the same time Louise accepted from the court of Saxony a considerable
+monthly allowance on condition that "she undertake nothing liable to
+compromise the reigning family, either by criticism or story, either by
+word, deed or in writing."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Frederick Augustus, King_
+
+Upon his father's death, Frederick Augustus succeeded King George
+October 15, 1904. He is now forty-seven years old, while Louise is
+forty-two.
+
+The King of Saxony has six children by Louise, three boys and three
+girls, five born in wedlock, the youngest born without wedlock. The
+children born in wedlock are:
+
+    The present Crown Prince, born 1893.
+    Frederick Christian, likewise born in 1893.
+    Ernest, born 1896.
+    Margaret, born 1900.
+    And Marie Alix, born 1901.
+
+The youngest Princess of Saxony, so called, Anna Monica, was born by
+Louise more than six months after she left her husband and nearly three
+months after her divorce.
+
+Louise desired to retain Anna Monica in her own custody, but though the
+child's fathership is in doubt, to say the least, Frederick Augustus
+insisted upon the little one's transference to his care.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Allowance Raised and a Further Threat_
+
+King Frederick Augustus raised Louise's allowance to $12,000 per year,
+"which alimony ceases if the said Countess Montiguoso shall commit,
+either personally, directly or indirectly, any act in writing or
+otherwise liable to injure the reputation of King Frederick Augustus or
+members of the royal family of Saxony, or if the said Countess
+Montiguoso contributes to any such libellous publication in any manner
+or form."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_The Divorce of Royal Couple Illegal_
+
+After divorce was pronounced against her, Louise declined to accept the
+decree of the court, pronouncing the proceedings illegal on the ground
+that both she and husband are Catholics and that the Roman Catholic
+Church, under no circumstances, recognizes divorce. Her protest gained
+importance from the fact that her marriage to Frederick Augustus was
+solemnized by the rites of the Roman Catholic Church. The Saxon court,
+on the other hand, justified its own decision by basing same on a
+certain civil ceremony entered into by Louise and Frederick Augustus
+previous to the church marriage.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Louise Marries a Second Time_
+
+When Louise realized in the course of years that Frederick Augustus
+would not take her back, she changed her mind as to the illegality of
+her divorce and married, September 25, 1907, Enrico Toselli, an Italian
+composer and pianist of small reputation.
+
+This marriage was performed civilly. They have one child, a boy, about
+whose custody the now legally separated parents have instituted several
+actions in law. The boy has now been allotted to the care of Toselli's
+mother.
+
+
+_King Did Not Marry Again_
+
+King Frederick Augustus, though by the laws of Saxony and Germany
+allowed to contract a second marriage, has not availed himself of the
+license, probably in deference to the wishes of the Vatican. At the same
+time he spurned all of Louise's attempts at reconciliation, the most
+dramatic of which was her _coup de tete_ of December, 1904, when she
+went to Dresden "to see her children," was arrested at the palace gate
+and conducted out of the kingdom by high police officials.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+_Other Royalties Mentioned in This Volume_
+
+Louise refers, in her Diary, to the Kaiser as "cousin." If there be any
+relationship between her and William, it is that imposed by the Saxon
+marriage, Saxon princes and princesses having frequently intermarried
+with the royal and princely Hohenzollerns, despite the differences of
+religion. There are four courts of Saxony despite that of Dresden:
+Weimar, Meiningen, Altenburg and Coburg and Gotha.
+
+The latter duchy's ruler, Karl Eduard, is of English descent, a son of
+the late Duke of Albany. Hence, Louise's cousinship with Victoria
+Melita, sometime Grand Duchess of Hesse, now Grand Duchess Kyril of
+Russia.
+
+Of course, Louise is closely related to all the Orleans and Bourbons.
+
+Marie Antoinette, Queen of France, who died on the scaffold at Paris,
+October 16, 1793, she calls her great-grand-aunt and namesake, claiming,
+at the same time, most of the Kings and princes of France of the
+seventeenth and eighteenth centuries as relatives.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+
+    CHAPTER I
+
+    MOTHERHOOD
+
+                                                                       PAGE
+
+    A sterile Royal Family once fruitful--Diary true record of
+    self--Long legs of Countess Solms--A child only because
+    he can't help it--Wet nurse to Socialist brat--Royal
+    permit for nursing--Royal negligee talk--A Saxon
+    failing                                                               1
+
+    CHAPTER II
+
+    THE SWEET FAMILY
+
+    Husband loving, but family nasty--Money considerations--Brutal
+    caresses in public--Pests in the family--Awful
+    serenity--Meddle with angels' or devils' affairs--Father-in-law's
+    gritty kiss                                                           7
+
+    CHAPTER III
+
+    WEEPING WILLOW--EMBLEM ROYAL
+
+    A pious fraud--Theresa Mayer--Character of the Queen--Mopishness
+    rampant                                                              11
+
+    CHAPTER IV
+
+    MY UNPLEASANT YOUTH
+
+    Father hard to get along with--Royal imaginations--Kings
+    cursing other kings--Poverty and pretense--Piety that
+    makes children suffer--Up at five to pray on cold
+    stones--Chilblains and prayer                                        15
+
+    CHAPTER V
+
+    A FIERCE DISCIPLINARIAN
+
+    Diamonds used to punish children--Face object of attacks--
+    Grunting and snorting at the royal table--Blood flowing
+    at dinner--My brother jumps out of a window                          19
+
+    CHAPTER VI
+
+    LEOPOLD DEFENDS MY HONOR AT HIS PERIL
+
+    Punished for objecting to familiarities--Awful names I was
+    called--Locked in the room with wicked teacher--Defend
+    myself with burning lamp--My brother nearly kills
+    my would-be assailant                                                23
+
+    CHAPTER VII
+
+    PRINCES AND PRINCESSES DANCE TO THE TUNE OF THE WHIP
+
+    The result shows in the character of rulers--Why English
+    kings and princes are superior to the Continental kind--Leopold's
+    awful revenge--Mother acts the tigress--Her
+    mailed fist--"I forbid Your Imperial Highness to see
+    that dog"                                                            27
+
+    CHAPTER VIII
+
+    PLANNING TO GET A HUSBAND FOR ME
+
+    Dissecting possible wooers at Vienna--Royalty after money,
+    not character--"He is a Cohen, not a Coburg"--Prince
+    who looked like a Jew counter-jumper in his Sunday
+    best--Balkan princes tabooed by Francis Joseph--A
+    good time for the girls--Army men commanded to attend
+    us                                                                   35
+
+    CHAPTER IX
+
+    LOVE-MAKING
+
+    The fascinating Baron--The man's audacity--Putting the
+    question boldly--Real love-making--_Risque_ stories for
+    royalty                                                              41
+
+    CHAPTER X
+
+    MY POPULARITY RENDERS GEORGE DYSPEPTIC
+
+    The Cudgel-Majesty--Prince George's intrigues--No four-horse
+    coach for Princess--Popular demonstration in my
+    favor--"All-highest" displeasure                                     45
+
+    CHAPTER XI
+
+    SCOLDED FOR BEING POPULAR
+
+    Entourage spied upon by George's minions--My husband
+    proves a weakling--I disavow the personal compliment--No
+    more intelligent than a king should be                               53
+
+    CHAPTER XII
+
+    ROYAL DISGRACE--LIGHTNING AND SHADOWS
+
+    Ordered around by the Queen--Give thanks to a bully--Jealous
+    of the "mob's" applause--"The old monkey after
+    '_Hochs_'"--Criticizing the "old man"--Royalty's plea for
+    popularity--Proposed punishments for people refusing
+    to love royalty                                                      57
+
+    CHAPTER XIII
+
+    UNSPEAKABLE LITTLENESSES OF PETTY COURTS
+
+    Another quarrel with my husband--Personal attendant to a
+    corpse--Killing by pin pricks--The mythical three "_How
+    art thou's?_"--Unwanted sympathy from my inferiors--Pride
+    of the decapitated Queen of France is in me--Lovers
+    not impossible--Court to blame for them--My
+    husband acts cowardly--Brutalizes my household--I
+    lock myself in                                                       63
+
+    CHAPTER XIV
+
+    IMPERIAL RUSSIAN ETHICS TRANSFERRED TO DRESDEN
+
+    My husband's reported escapade--Did he give diamonds to a
+    dancing girl?--His foolish excuses--"I am your pal"--A
+    restaurant scene in St. Petersburg--The birthday
+    suit                                                                 71
+
+    CHAPTER XV
+
+    ROYALTY NOT PRETTY, AND WHY
+
+    Fecundity royal women's greatest charm--How to have
+    beautiful children                                                   77
+
+    CHAPTER XVI
+
+    MORE JEALOUSIES OF THE GREAT
+
+    Men and women caress me with their eyes--Some disrespectful
+    sayings and doings of mine--First decided quarrel
+    with Frederick Augustus--I go to the theatre in spite
+    of him                                                               81
+
+    CHAPTER XVII
+
+    THE ROYAL PRINCE, WHO BEHAVES LIKE A DRUNKEN BRICKLAYER
+
+    I face the music, but my husband runs away--Prince George
+    can't look me in the eye--He roars and bellows--Advocates
+    wife-beating--I defy him--German classics--"Jew
+    literature" _Auto da fe_ ordered                                     85
+
+    CHAPTER XVIII
+
+    I DEFY THEM
+
+    Laughter and pleasant faces for me--Frederick Augustus refuses
+    to back me, but I don't care--We quarrel about
+    my reading--He professes to gross ignorance                          91
+
+    CHAPTER XIX
+
+    ATTEMPTED VIOLENCE DEFEATED BY FIRMNESS
+
+    Frederick Augustus seeks to carry out his father's brutal
+    threats--Orders and threats before servants--I positively
+    refuse to be ordered about--Frederick Augustus
+    plays Mrs. Lot--Enjoying myself at the theatre                       95
+
+    CHAPTER XX
+
+    TITLED SERVANTS LOW AND CUNNING
+
+    George tries to rob me of my confidante--Enter the King's
+    spy, Baroness Tisch in her true character--Punishment
+    of one royal spy                                                     99
+
+    CHAPTER XXI
+
+    BANISHMENT
+
+    I am ordered to repair to a country house with the hated spy
+    as my Grand Mistress--My first impulse to go home,
+    but afraid parents won't have me                                    103
+
+    CHAPTER XXII
+
+    "POOR RELATIONS" IN ROYAL HOUSES
+
+    Myself and Frederick Augustus quarrel and pound table--The
+    Countess Cosel's golden vessel--Off to Brighton--Threat
+    of a beating--I provoke shadows of divorce--King
+    threatens force--More defiance on my part--I
+    humble the King and am allowed to invite my brother
+    Leopold                                                             105
+
+    CHAPTER XXIII
+
+    A SERVANT-TYRANT
+
+    My correspondence is not safe from the malicious woman
+    appointed Grand Mistress--Lovers at a distance and by
+    correspondence--Fell in love with a leg                             115
+
+    CHAPTER XXIV
+
+    MORE TYRANNY OF A TITLED SERVANT
+
+    My daily papers seized, and only milk-and-water clippings
+    are submitted--"King's orders"--Grand Mistress's veracity
+    doubted--My threats of suspension cow her                           119
+
+    CHAPTER XXV
+
+    THE TWO BLACK SHEEP OF THE FAMILY UNITED
+
+    Leopold upon my troubles and his own--Imperial Hapsburgs
+    that, though Catholics, got divorces or married
+    divorced women--Books that are full of guilty knowledge,
+    according to royalty--A mud-hole lodging for one
+    Imperial Highness--Leopold's girl--What I think of
+    army officers' wives--Their anonymous letters--Leopold's
+    money troubles--We will fool our enemies by
+    feigning obedience                                                  123
+
+    CHAPTER XXVI
+
+    FREDERICK AUGUSTUS CONTINUES VERY RAW
+
+    Manners _a la_ barracks natural to royal princes--Names I
+    am called--My ladies scandalized--Leopold turned over
+    a new leaf, according to agreement, and is well treated--The
+    King grateful to me for having "influenced Leopold
+    to be good"                                                         129
+
+    CHAPTER XXVII
+
+    PRINCE MAX MAKES LOVE TO ME
+
+    Wants me to consult him on all spiritual matters--Warns me
+    against the Kaiser, the heretic bishop--Princes as ill-mannered
+    as Russian-Jew up-starts                                            133
+
+    CHAPTER XXVIII
+
+    THE SHAH OF PERSIA FALLS IN LOVE WITH ME
+
+    The "animal" and his show of diamonds and rubies--Overcome
+    by love he treats me like a lady of the harem--On
+    the defensive--The King of kings an ill-behaved
+    brute--Eats like a pig and affronts Queen--Wiped off
+    greasy hands on my state robe--When ten thousand
+    gouged-out eyes carpeted his throne--Offers of jewels--"Does
+    he take me for a ballet girl?"--The Shah almost
+    compromises me--King, alarmed, abruptly ends
+    dinner--I receive presents from him                                 135
+
+    CHAPTER XXIX
+
+    THE SHAH COMPROMISES ME IN PUBLIC
+
+    Has only eyes for me at the grand manoeuvres, and I can't
+    drive him from my carriage--Ignores the King and the
+    military spectacle--Calls me his adored one--Court in
+    despair--Shah ruins priceless carpets to make himself
+    a lamb stew                                                         139
+
+    CHAPTER XXX
+
+    MY LIFE AT COURT BECOMES UNBEARABLE
+
+    Laughter a crime--Disappointed Queen lays down the law
+    for my behavior--Frederick Augustus sometimes fighting
+    drunk--Draws sword on me--Prince George would have
+    me beaten--To bed with his boots on                                 143
+
+    CHAPTER XXXI
+
+    PRISON FOR PRINCES THAT OPPOSE THE KING
+
+    Duke of Saxony banished--Cut off from good literature
+    even--Anecdote concerning the Grand Dauphin and his
+    "kettledrums"--A royal prince's garrison life--His association
+    with lewd women                                                     147
+
+    CHAPTER XXXII
+
+    PRINCE GEORGE SHOWN THE DOOR BY GRAND-DUCHESS MELITA
+
+    A royal lady who walks her garden attired in a single diaphanous
+    garment--Won't stand for any meddling--Called
+    impertinent--My virtuous indignation assumed--A
+    flirtation at a distance--An audacious lover--The
+    Grand Mistress hoodwinked--Matrimonial horns for
+    Kaiser--The banished Duke dies--Princes scolded like
+    school-boys                                                         151
+
+    CHAPTER XXXIII
+
+    MELITA'S LOVE AFFAIRS AND MINE
+
+    The Grand Duchess tells me how she cudgeled George--Living
+    dictaphone employed--Shows him who is mistress
+    of the house--Snaps fingers in Prince George's
+    face--Debate about titles--"A sexless thing of a husband"--Conference
+    between lover and husband--Grand
+    Duke doesn't object to his wife's lover, but lover objects
+    to "his paramour being married"                                     157
+
+    CHAPTER XXXIV
+
+    MORE ABOUT THE SWEET ROYAL FAMILY LIFE
+
+    "Closed season" for petty meannesses--A prince who enjoys
+    himself like a pig--Why princes learn trades--A family
+    dinner to the accompaniment of threats and smashing of
+    table--The Duke's widow and children robbed of their
+    inheritance by royal family--King confiscates testament             163
+
+    CHAPTER XXXV
+
+    FLIRTATION DEVELOPS INTO LOVE
+
+    At the theatre--My adorer must have felt my presence--Forgot
+    his diplomacy--The mute salute--His good looks--His
+    mouth a promise of a thousand sweet kisses--Our
+    love won't be any painted business                                  169
+
+    CHAPTER XXXVI
+
+    COUNT BIELSK MAKES LOVE TO THE CROWN PRINCESS
+
+    Fearless to indiscretion--He "thou's" me--Puts all his
+    chances on one card--Proposes a rendezvous--Shall I
+    go or shall I not go?--Peril if I go and peril if I don't           171
+
+    CHAPTER XXXVII
+
+    RAPID LOVE MAKING IN THE BOIS
+
+    A discreet maid--"Remove thy glove"--Kisses of passion,
+    pure kisses, powerful kisses--I see my lover daily--Countess
+    Barnello offers "doves' nest"--Driving to
+    rendezvous in state--"Naughty Louise," who makes fun
+    of George                                                           177
+
+    CHAPTER XXXVIII
+
+    "IN LOVE THERE ARE NO PRINCESSES, ONLY WOMEN"
+
+    A diplomatic trick--Jealous of Romano's past--The pact for
+    life and the talisman--If there were a theatre fire the
+    talisman would discover our love to the King--Some
+    ill-natured reflections--Bernhardt's escapades cover up
+    my tracks--The "black sheep" jumps his horse over a
+    coffin--King gives him a beating--Bernhardt's mess-room
+    lingo--Anecdotes of royal voluptuaries--Forces
+    animals to devour each other--Naked ballet-girls as
+    horses--Abnormals rule the world                                    183
+
+    CHAPTER XXXIX
+
+    MY PUNISHMENT
+
+    I lose my lover--Quarrels with me because I did my duty
+    as a mother--Royalty extols me for the same reason---My
+    pride of kingship aroused by Socialist scribblers--Change
+    my opinion as to Duke's widow--Parents arrive--Father
+    and his alleged astrolatry--His finances disarranged
+    by alimony payments--My uncle, the Emperor,
+    rebukes mother harshly for complaining of _roue_
+    father                                                              193
+
+    CHAPTER XL
+
+    A PLEBEIAN LOVER
+
+    In need of a friend--My physician offers his friendship--I
+    discover that he loves me, but he will never confess--I
+    give him encouragement--We manage to persuade
+    the King to further our intrigue--Not a bit repentant of
+    my peccadilloes--Very submissive--Introduced to my
+    lover's wife                                                        199
+
+    CHAPTER XLI
+
+    AN ATROCIOUS ROYAL SCANDAL
+
+    A royal couple that shall be nameless--The voluptuous
+    Duchess--Her husband the worst of degenerates--"What
+    monsters these royalties be"--Nameless outrages--A
+    Duchess forced to have lovers--Ferdinand and I
+    live like married folk--Duchess feared for her life--Her
+    husband murdered her--I scold and humiliate my overbearing
+    Grand Mistress--The medical report too horrible
+    to contemplate                                                      205
+
+    CHAPTER XLII
+
+    I LOSE ANOTHER OF MY LOVERS
+
+    Happily no scandal--Rewarded for bearing children--$1250--for
+    becoming a mother--Royal poverty--Bernhardt,
+    the black sheep, in hot water again--The King rebukes
+    me for taking his part                                              213
+
+    CHAPTER XLIII
+
+    THE CROWN PRINCESS QUELLS A RIOT
+
+    Asked to play the coward, and I refuse--A hostler who
+    would die for a look from me--Hostler marriages in
+    royal houses--Anecdotes and unknown facts concerning
+    royal ladies and their offspring--Refuse police escort
+    and rioters acclaim me--Whole royal family proud
+    of my feat                                                          219
+
+    CHAPTER XLIV
+
+    THE NEW LOVER, AND "I PLAY THE HUSSY FOR FAIR"
+
+    Who is that most exquisite _Vortaenzer?_--A lovely boy--"Blush,
+    good white paper"--I long for Henry--My eyes
+    reflect love--"I must see you tonight. Arrange with
+    Lucretia"--Sorry I ever loved a man before Henry--Poetry
+    even--I try to get him an office at court--Afraid
+    women will steal him                                                227
+
+    CHAPTER XLV
+
+    LOVE AND THE HAPPINESS IT CONVEYS
+
+    My Grand Mistress suspects because I am so amiable--Pangs
+    of jealousy--Every good-looking man pursued by women--A
+    good story of my cousin, the Duchess Berri--We
+    all go cycling together--The Vitzthums--Love making
+    on the street--A mud bath                                           233
+
+    CHAPTER XLVI
+
+    FEARS FOR MY LOVE
+
+    Some reflections on queens of old who punished recreant
+    lovers--Henry was in debt and I gave him money--Indignities
+    by which some of that money was earned--Husband
+    accompanies me to Loschwitz--Reflections on
+    Frederick Augustus's character                                      239
+
+    CHAPTER XLVII
+
+    LOVE'S INTERMEZZO
+
+    Bernhardt takes advantage of my day-dreams--My husband's
+    indolent _gaucherie_--Violent love-making--Ninon who
+    loved families, not men--Does Bernhardt really love me?             245
+
+    CHAPTER XLVIII
+
+    GRAND MISTRESS TELLS HUSBAND I KEEP A DIARY
+
+    He wants to see it, but seems unsuspecting--Grand Mistress
+    denies that she meant mischief, but I upbraid her
+    unmercifully--Threaten to dismiss her like a thieving
+    lackey                                                              251
+
+    CHAPTER XLIX
+
+    ARISTOCRATIC VISITORS
+
+    I hear disquieting news about my lover's character--The
+    aristocracy a dirty lot--Love-making made easy by titled
+    friends--Anecdotes of Richelieu and the Duke of Orleans--The
+    German nobleman who married Miss Wheeler and
+    had to resign his birthright--The disreputable business
+    the Pappenheims and other nobles used to be in--I am
+    afraid to question my lover as to charges                           255
+
+    CHAPTER L
+
+    TO LIVE UNDER KING'S AND PRINCE GEORGE'S EYE
+
+    Abruptly ordered to the royal summer residence--The Vitzthums
+    and Henry take flight--Enmeshed by Prince
+    George's intrigues--Those waiting for a crown have no
+    friends--What I will do when Queen--No wonder Kings
+    of old married only relatives--Interesting facts about
+    relative marriages furnished by scientist                           261
+
+    CHAPTER LI
+
+    COLD RECEPTION--ENEMIES ALL AROUND
+
+    Frederick Augustus gives his views on adultery--Doesn't
+    care personally, but "the King knows"--"Thank God,
+    the King is ill"--I am deprived of my children--Have
+    I got the moral strength to defy my enemies?                        265
+
+    CHAPTER LII
+
+    PRINCE GEORGE REVEALS TO ME THE DEPTH OF HIS HATRED
+
+    A terrible interview--"The devil will come to claim you"--Uncertain
+    how much the King and Prince George know--I
+    break into the nursery and stay with my children all
+    day--Prince George insults me in my own rooms and
+    threatens prison if I disobey him                                   269
+
+    CHAPTER LIII
+
+    REVOLVER IN HAND, I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION
+
+    An insolent Grand Mistress, but of wonderful courage--Imprisonment,
+    threats to kill have no effect on her--Disregards
+    my titles--My lover's souvenir and endearing
+    words--How she caused Henry to leave me--My paroxysms
+    of rage--Henry's complete betrayal of me                            273
+
+    CHAPTER LIV
+
+    FORCED TO DO PENANCE LIKE A TRAPPIST-MONK
+
+    "By the King's orders"--I submit for the sake of my children--Must
+    fast as well as pray--In delicate health, I insist
+    upon returning to Dresden--Bernhardt, to avoid
+    being maltreated by King, threatens him with his sword--The
+    King's awful wrath--Bernhardt prisoner in Nossen--I
+    escape, temporarily, protracted _ennui_                             279
+
+    CHAPTER LV
+
+    FRANCIS JOSEPH JOINS MY SAXON ENEMIES
+
+    Cuts me dead before whole family--Everybody talks over
+    my head at dinner--I refuse to attend more court festivities--Husband
+    protests because I won't stand for insult
+    from Emperor--I give rein to my contempt for his
+    family--Hypocrites, despoilers, gamblers, religious maniacs,
+    brutes--Benign lords to the people, tyrants at home--I
+    cry for my children like a she-dog whose young
+    were drowned                                                        285
+
+    CHAPTER LVI
+
+    I AM DETERMINED TO DO AS I PLEASE
+
+    I reject mother's tearful reproaches--I beard Prince George
+    in his lair despite whining chamberlains--I tell him what
+    I think of him, and he becomes frightened--Threatens
+    madhouse--"I dare you to steal my children"--I win my
+    point--and the children--"Her Imperial Highness regrets"--Lots
+    of forbidden literature--Precautions against
+    intriguing Grand Mistress--The affair with Henry--was
+    it a flower-covered pit to entrap me?--Castle Stolpen
+    and some of its awful history                                       291
+
+    CHAPTER LVII
+
+    I CONFESS TO PAPA
+
+    King Albert dies and King George a very sick man--Papa's
+    good advice--"You will be Queen soon"--A lovely old
+    man, very much troubled                                             301
+
+    CHAPTER LVIII
+
+    MONSIEUR GIRON--RICHARD, THE ARTIST
+
+    The King asks me to superintend lessons by M. Giron--A
+    most fascinating man--His Grecian eyes--He is a painter
+    as well as a teacher--In love--Careless whether I am
+    caught in my lover's arms--"Richard" talks anarchy to
+    me--Why I don't believe in woman suffrage--Characters
+    and doings of women in power                                        305
+
+    CHAPTER LIX
+
+    THE PEOPLE THINK ME A WANTON
+
+    Credit me with innumerable lovers, but don't disapprove--Glad
+    the King feels scandalized--Picture of the "she-monster"--Everybody
+    eager for love--I delight in Richard's
+    jealousy--Husband's indelicate announcement at
+    table--I rush from the royal opera to see my lover--A
+    threatening dream--Richard not mercenary like my noble
+    lovers                                                              309
+
+    CHAPTER LX
+
+    THE DAY OF JUDGMENT LOOMS UP
+
+    My Grand Mistress shows her colors--Richard advises flight--I
+    hesitate on account of my children--My Grand Mistress
+    steals a letter from Richard to me--I opine that an
+    adulteress's word is as good as a thief's--I humble my
+    Grand Mistress, but it won't do me much good--Pleasant
+    hours at his studio                                                 317
+
+    CHAPTER LXI
+
+    A MAD HOUSE FOR LOUISE--PROBABLY
+
+    My confidential maid, Lucretia, is banished--The new King
+    has got the incriminating letter, but Frederick Augustus
+    says nothing--On the eve of judgment the King falls ill             321
+
+    CHAPTER LXII
+
+    KING'S ILLNESS A BOON TO LOVERS
+
+    Prayers mixed with joy--Espionage disorganized, and I can
+    do as I please--Love-making in the school-room--Buying
+    a ring for Richard--"Wishing it on"--"Our marriage"--King's
+    life despaired of--My tormentors obsequious--Smile
+    at my peccadilloes--Husband proud of
+    me--My popularity a great asset--Frederick Augustus
+    delighted when he hears that King can't last long--The
+    joyous luncheon at Richard's studio--Making fun of
+    majesties--I expect to be Queen presently                           325
+
+    CHAPTER LXIII
+
+    WHAT I WILL DO WHEN I AM QUEEN
+
+    A foretaste: titled servants put me _en route_ for lover--The
+    bargain I will propose to Frederick Augustus--Frederick
+    Augustus will be a complaisant King--To revive
+    _Petit Trianon_--I am addressed as Queen                            331
+
+    CHAPTER LXIV
+
+    THE KING IS ALIVE AND PUNISHMENT NEAR
+
+    My queenship postponed--King George publicly acclaimed--Cuts
+    me dead in church--Frederick Augustus's disappointment--Terrible
+    power of a king over his family,
+    and no appeal--I am like the nude witch of old                      335
+
+    CHAPTER LXV
+
+    FISTICUFFS DON'T SAVE MY CROWN
+
+    The attempted theft of my Diary--Grand Mistress discovered
+    after breaking open my desk--Reading Diary like
+    mad--Personal encounter between me and Grand Mistress--I
+    am the stronger, and carry off the manuscript,
+    but have to leave all my love letters, which go to the
+    King--I discover that they had stolen the key to my
+    Diary from my neck                                                  339
+
+    CHAPTER LXVI
+
+    ABANDONED
+
+    My titled servants withdraw from me--An old footman my
+    sole support--Queen takes the children--Old Andrew
+    plays spy for me                                                    343
+
+    CHAPTER LXVII
+
+    FAMILY COUNCIL AT CASTLE
+
+    Rendezvous at studio--State takes my children from me--Madhouse
+    or flight--I brought fifty-two trunks to the
+    palace--Depart with small satchel--If I attempt to see
+    my children I'll be seized as "mad woman"--Varying
+    emotions of the last ten minutes--Threatening shadows
+    thrown on a curtain decide me--Ready for flight--Diary
+    the last thing to go into the satchel                               345
+
+
+[Illustration: FROM LOUISE'S DIARY]
+
+
+
+THE STORY OF LOUISE, CROWN PRINCESS OF SAXONY
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I
+
+MOTHERHOOD
+
+    A sterile Royal Family once fruitful--Diary true record of
+    self--Long legs of Countess Solms--A child only because he can't
+    help it--Wet nurse to Socialist brat--Royal permit for
+    nursing--Royal negligee talk--A Saxon failing.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _February 17, 1893_.
+
+I did my duty towards the Saxons. I gave them a Prince. The Royal House
+ought to be grateful to me:--I am helping to perpetuate it. Who would,
+if I didn't? My sister-in-law, Princess Mathilde, is an old maid. The
+other, Maria Josepha, as sterile as Sarah was before she reached the
+nineties. This applies also to Isabelle, the wife of brother-in-law,
+John-George. And Prince Max, tired of ballet girls, is about to take the
+soutane.
+
+There is just one more royal Saxon princess, Elizabeth, and she
+succeeded in having children neither with her husband _de jure_, the
+late Duke of Genoa, nor with her husband-lover, Marquis Rapallo.
+
+Louise, then, is the sole living hope of the royal Saxons that, only 160
+years ago, boasted of a sovereign having three hundred and fifty-two
+children to his credit, among them not a few subsequently accounted
+geniuses. Augustus, the Physical Strong (1670 to 1733), was the happy
+father, the _Mareshal de_ Saxe one of his numerous gifted offspring.
+
+Alas, since then the House of Wettin has declined not in numbers only.
+
+Poor baby is burdened with ten names in honor of so many ancestors. Why,
+in addition, they want to call him "Maria" I cannot for the life of me
+understand, for there never was a Saxon princess or queen that amounted
+to a row of pins.
+
+I wonder whether they will say the same of me after the crown of the
+Wettiners descended upon my brow. Those so inclined should consult these
+papers ere they begin throwing stones, for my Diary is intended to
+contain my innermost thoughts, my ambitions, my promises for the future,
+_Myself_, and let no one judge me by what I say other than what is
+recorded here.
+
+These pages are my Father Confessor. I confess to myself,--what a woman
+in my position says to members of her family or official and
+semi-official persons--her servants, so to speak--doesn't signify, to
+borrow a phrase from my good cousin, the Kaiser Wilhelm.
+
+Father-in-law George tells me to trust no one but him, my husband, and
+Frederick Augustus's sisters, cousins and aunts, and to rely on prayer
+only, yet, stubborn as nature made me, I prefer respectable white paper
+to my sweet relatives.
+
+Up to now my most ambitious literary attempts were intimate letters to
+my brother Leopold, the "Black Sheep." As I now start in writing letters
+to myself, it occurs to me that my worse self may be corresponding with
+my better self, or vice versa. If I was only a poet like Countess Solms,
+but, dear, no. All real bluestockings are ugly and emaciated. Solms is
+both, and her legs are as long and as thin as those of Diana, my English
+hunter.
+
+I think this Diary business will be quite amusing,--at any rate, it will
+be more so than the conversation of my ladies. Ah, those ladies of the
+court of Saxony! If they would only talk of anything else but orphans,
+sisters of charity and ballet girls. The latter always have one foot in
+Hades, while you can see the wings grow on the backs of the others.
+
+When the von Schoenberg struts in, peacock fashion, and announces "his
+royal Highness did himself the honor to soil his bib," I sometimes stare
+at her, not comprehending at the moment, and the fact that she is
+talking of my baby only gradually comes to mind. Isn't it ridiculous
+that a little squalling bit of humanity, whom the accident of birth
+planted in a palace, is royalty first and all the time, and a child only
+because he can't help it?
+
+As for me, I am a woman and mother first, and my child is an animated
+lump of flesh and blood--_my_ flesh and blood--first and all the time.
+Of course, when baby came I wanted to nurse it. You should have seen
+Frederick Augustus's face. If I had proposed to become a wet-nurse to
+some "socialist brat" he couldn't have been more astonished. Yet my
+great ancestress, the Empress Maria Theresa, nursed her babies "before a
+parquet of proletarians," at the theatre and at reviews, and thought
+nothing of giving the breast to a poor foundling left in the park of
+Schoenbrunn.
+
+Frederick Augustus recovered his speech after a while--though he never
+says anything that would seem to require reflection, he always acts the
+deep thinker. "Louise," he mumbled reproachfully,--"what will his
+Majesty say?"
+
+"I thought you were the father of the child," I remarked innocently.
+
+"No levity where the King is concerned," he corrected poor me. "You know
+very well that for an act of this kind a royal permit must be previously
+obtained."
+
+Followed a long pause to give his mental apparatus time to think some
+more. Then: "And, besides, it will hurt your figure."
+
+"Augusta Victoria" (the German Empress) "nursed half a dozen children,
+and her _decollete_ is still much admired," I insisted.
+
+Frederick Augustus paid no attention to this argument. "Anyhow, I don't
+want the doctors to examine your breast daily," he said with an air of
+mixed sentimentality and brusqueness.
+
+These were not his own words, though. My husband, not content with
+calling a spade a spade, invariably uses the nastiest terms in the
+dictionary of debauchery. When he tells me of his love adventures before
+marriage it's always "I bagged that girl," or "I made something tender
+out of her," just as a hunter talks of game or a leg of venison.
+
+He doesn't want to be rude; he is so without knowing it. His indelicacy
+would be astounding in a man born on the steps of the throne, if the
+Princes of this royal house were not all inclined that way.
+
+Two weeks after my accouchement George and Isabelle called. Though
+brother and sister-in-law, we are not at all on terms of intimacy.
+Frederick Augustus made some remarks of a personal nature that sent all
+the blood to my head; Isabelle seemed to enjoy my discomfort, but George
+had the decency to go to the window and comment on the dirty boots of a
+guard lieutenant just entering the courtyard. Frederick Augustus
+thought he had made a hit with Isabelle and applauded his own effort
+with a loud guffaw, while pounding his thighs, which seems to give him
+particular satisfaction.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II
+
+THE SWEET FAMILY
+
+    Husband loving, but family nasty--Money considerations--Brutal
+    caresses in public--Pests in the family--Awful serenity--Meddle with
+    angels' or devils' affairs--Father-in-law's gritty kiss.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _February 24, 1893_.
+
+I have been married some fifteen months and I love my husband. He is
+kind, not too inquisitive and passionate. I have better claims to
+domestic happiness than most of my royal sisters on or near the thrones
+of Europe. Of course when I married into the Saxon royal family I
+expected to be treated with ill-concealed enmity. Wasn't I young and
+handsome? Reason enough for the old maids and childless wives, my new
+sweet relatives, to detest me.
+
+Wasn't I poor? I brought little with me and my presence entailed a
+perpetual expense. Now in royal families money is everything, or nearly
+so, and the newcomer that eats but doesn't increase the family fortune
+is regarded as an interloper.
+
+If I hadn't "_made good_," that is if, in due time, I hadn't become a
+mother, my position among the purse-proud, rapacious and narrow-minded
+Wettiners would have become wellnigh intolerable. But I proved myself a
+_Holstein_. I rose superior to Queen Carola, who never had a child, and
+to Maria, Mathilda, Isabelle and Elizabeth, who either couldn't or
+didn't. But, to my mind, acting the _cow_ for the benefit of the race
+did not invite stable manners.
+
+I wasn't used to them. They hadn't figured in the dreams of my girlhood.
+I thought love less robust. I didn't expect to be squeezed before my
+ladies. Even the best beloved husband shouldn't take liberties with his
+wife's waist in the parlor.
+
+And Frederick Augustus's negligee talk is no less offensive than his
+manner of laying loving hands on my person. As a rule, he treats me like
+a third-row dancing girl that goes to petition the manager for a place
+nearer the footlights. There is no limit to his familiarities or to the
+license of his conversation. "_Fine wench_" is a term of affection he
+likes to bestow on his future queen; indeed, one of the less gross. He
+has the weakness to like epithets that, I am told, gentlemen sometimes
+use in their clubs, but never towards a mistress they half-way respect.
+
+My father-in-law, Prince George, is a pest of another kind. While
+Frederick Augustus is jovial and rude, George is rude and serene of a
+serenity that would make a Grand Inquisitor look gay.
+
+One of my famous ancestresses, the Princess-Palatine, sister-in-law of
+Louis the Fourteenth, once boxed the Dauphin's ears for a trick he
+played on her, by putting his upright thumb in the centre of an armchair
+which her royal highness meant to sit on.
+
+Whenever I behold George's funereal visage, I long to repeat the
+Dauphin's undignified offense. I would like to see this royal parcel of
+melancholy jump and dance; change that ever-frowning and mournful aspect
+of his. Indeed, I would like to treat him to one of the anecdotes that
+made the Duchess de Berri explode with laughter.
+
+Frederick Augustus lives in deadly fear of him, and never gets his hair
+cut without first considering whether his father will approve or not.
+George isn't happy unless he renders other people unhappy. I actually
+believe he would rather meddle with the angels' or devils' affairs than
+say his prayers, though he is a bigot of the most advanced stripe.
+
+Sometimes when the itch for meddling has hold of him, he cites all the
+married princes of the royal house and lectures them on the wickedness
+of having no children, winding up by commanding each one to explain, in
+detail, his failure to have offspring.
+
+Of course, these gentlemen put the blame on their wives, whereupon the
+ladies are forthwith summoned to be threatened and cajoled.
+
+Prince George had the great goodness to approve of my baby and to
+congratulate me, also to set me up as an example for Isabelle. When I
+return to Dresden I shall be made Colonel of Horse.
+
+Twice has George kissed me,--upon my arrival in Saxony and five days
+after the birth of my child. It felt like a piece of gritty ice rubbing
+against my forehead.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+
+WEEPING WILLOW--EMBLEM ROYAL
+
+    A pious fraud--Theresa Mayer--Character of the Queen--Mopishness
+    rampant.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _March 1, 1893_.
+
+Prince Max came unexpectedly. He is studying for the priesthood and
+looks more sour than his father even. I was in bed, nursing a sick
+headache, but presuming upon his future clerical dignity, he walked in
+without ceremony and sat down on a chair near my bed. Then he raised his
+hands in prayer and announced that he had come to assist in my
+devotions.
+
+"Forget that I am your brother-in-law and cousin," he said; "tell me
+what's in your heart, Louise, and I will pray to the good God for thee."
+
+"Don't trouble yourself," I replied, "I have a court chaplain charged
+with these affairs. Rather tell me about the latest comic opera."
+
+"Comic opera!" he stammered. "You don't intend to go to such worldly
+amusements now that you are a mother?"
+
+"Of course I do. The very day I return to Dresden I will take a look at
+your girl."
+
+"My--what?" gasped Max.
+
+"Your Theresa--Theresa Mayer. I understand she made a great hit in the
+_Geisha_, and everybody approves of your taste, Max."
+
+Max turned red, then green, and I thought to myself what a fool I was.
+He's a favorite with the King and Queen, and my father-in-law believes
+every word he says.
+
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _March 10, 1893_.
+
+Queen Carola is a good soul though she doesn't dare call her soul her
+own. I never heard her say "_peep_" in the presence of his Majesty. She
+looks forlorn and frightened when King Albert is around.
+
+I like her better since I am a mother, for she loves baby. Yes, though
+she is a Queen, I saw her actually smile at the child once or twice.
+
+Poor woman, the point of her nose is always red, and, like Father-in-law
+George, she believes weeping willow the only fit emblem for royalty. The
+look of the whipped dog is always in her weak eyes.
+
+I am too young and--they _do_ say--too frivolous to stand so much
+mopishness. These mustard-pots, sedate, grave, wan and long-faced, make
+me mad. I don't know what to say,--all I can do is try to hide my
+"un-princess-like" cheerfulness when they are around.
+
+I wish I had an ounce or so of diplomacy in my composition. It might
+enable me to sympathize with the fancied troubles of the Queen and
+Prince George, but I am incorrigible.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV
+
+MY UNPLEASANT YOUTH
+
+    Father hard to get along with--Royal imaginations--Kings cursing
+    other kings--Poverty and pretense--Piety that makes children
+    suffer--Up at five to pray on cold stones--Chilblains and prayer.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _March 11, 1893_.
+
+It occurs to me that, if this is intended as a record of my
+life--somewhat after the fashion of the _Margravine_ of Bayreuth's
+Memoirs--I ought to tell about my girlhood.
+
+Let me admit at once that my marriage to the Crown Prince of Saxony was,
+politically speaking, a stroke of good luck. My father, the Grand-duke
+of Tuscany, had been deprived of land and crown ten years before I was
+born, and, though he likes to pose as a sovereign, he is, as a matter of
+fact, a mere private gentleman of limited resources, whom the head of
+the family, the Austrian Emperor, may coax or browbeat at his sweet
+pleasure. If papa had been able to save his thronelet, I have no doubt
+he would be a most agreeable man, open-handed and eager to enjoy life,
+but instead of making the best of a situation over which he has no
+control, he is forever fretting about his lost dignities and about "his
+dear people" that don't care a snap for his love and affection. This
+makes him a trying person to get along with,--mention a king or prince
+in the full enjoyment of power, and father gets melancholy and calls
+Victor Emanuel, the second of his name, a brigand.
+
+He seldom or never visits his _confreres_ in the capitals of Europe, but
+when I was a girl our gloomy palace at Salzburg saw much of the ghosts
+of decaying royalty. The Dukes of Modena and Parma, the King of Hanover,
+the _Kurfurst_ of Hesse, the King of Naples and other monarchs and
+toy-monarchs that were handed their walking papers by sovereigns
+mightier than themselves, visited us off and on, filling the air with
+lamentations and cursing their fate.
+
+And, like papa, all these _ex'es_ are ready to fly out of their very
+skins the moment they notice the smallest breach of etiquette concerning
+their august selves. If they had the power, the Imperial Highnesses
+would execute any man that called them "Royal Highness," while the Royal
+Highnesses would be pleased to send to the gallows persons addressing
+them as "Highness" only.
+
+And papa has other troubles, and the greatest of them, lack of money.
+Poverty in private life must be hard enough, but a poor king, obliged to
+keep up the pretense of a court, is to be pitied indeed.
+
+Add to what I have said, father's share of domestic unhappiness. Mother
+is a Bourbon of Parma, serious-minded and hard like my father-in-law,
+and almost as much of a religious fanatic.
+
+Oh, how we children suffered by the piety of our mother. There were
+eight of us, myself the oldest of five girls, and seven years older than
+my sister Anna. Yet this baby, as soon as she could walk, was obliged to
+rise, like myself, at five o'clock summer and winter to go to the chapel
+and pray. The chapel was lighted only by a few wax candles and, of
+course, was unheated like the corridors of the palace. And like them it
+was paved with stones. Many a chilblain I carried away from kneeling on
+those granite flags.
+
+And the stupidity of the thing! Instead of saying our prayers we
+murmured and protested, and as soon as we were old enough we slipped
+portions of novels in our prayer-books, which we read while mass was
+said. That trick was not unfraught with danger though, for mother's
+spies were always after us, and the bad light made reading difficult.
+
+I am sure that if mother had found us out, she would have whipped us
+within an inch of our lives.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V
+
+A FIERCE DISCIPLINARIAN
+
+    Diamonds used to punish children--Face object of attacks--Grunting
+    and snorting at the royal table--Blood flowing at dinner--My brother
+    jumps out of a window.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _April 1, 1893_.
+
+Nothing of consequence happened since my last entry, and I continue the
+story of my girlhood.
+
+Her Imperial Highness, my pious mother, had a terrible way of punishing
+her children. The face of the culprit was invariably the object of her
+attacks. She hit us with the flat of her bony hand, rendered more
+terrible by innumerable rings. The sharp diamonds cut into the flesh and
+usually made the blood flow freely.
+
+The court chaplain at Salzburg was a peasant's boy without manners or
+breeding of any kind. While the least violation of etiquette or
+politeness on the children's part was punished by a box on the ear, or
+by withholding the next meal, mother overlooked the swinishness of the
+chaplain simply because he wore a black coat.
+
+One of the chaplain's most offensive habits was to grunt and snort when
+eating. On one occasion my brother Leopold gave a somewhat exaggerated
+imitation of these disgusting practices at table, whereupon mother,
+blind with fury, for she thought a priest could do no wrong, struck
+Leopold in the face, causing the blood to gush from his lacerated cheek.
+
+Father immediately rose from table and savagely turning upon mother
+said, "Understand, Madame, that as a sovereign and head of the family I
+will have no one punished in my presence. If I think punishment
+necessary, I will inflict it myself in a dignified way."
+
+Mother immediately began to cry. She always had a flood of tears ready
+when father offered the slightest reprimand. Afterwards she upbraided
+father and us, the children. If it were not for her incessant prayers,
+she said, and for the Christian life she was leading, God would have
+destroyed the Tuscans long ago, and she wasn't sure that either of us
+would attain Paradise except for her intercession with the Almighty.
+
+This and similar scenes and incidents disgusted me with religion early
+in life. Myself and all my brothers and sisters hated the very sight of
+the court chaplain who licked our mother's boots, while heaping
+punishments and indignities upon us.
+
+At one time my brother Leopold didn't know his catechism. "I will teach
+your Imperial Highness to skip your lessons," said the court chaplain.
+"Kneel before me and read the passage over ten times as a punishment."
+
+Leopold promptly answered: "I won't."
+
+"Yes, you will, Imperial Highness, for such are my orders," cried the
+court chaplain.
+
+Leopold said doggedly, "I kneel before the altar and before the Emperor,
+if he demands it, not before such as you."
+
+"Suppose I call on your Imperial Highness's mother and ask her to forbid
+you to mount a horse for a month or so?" queried our tormentor.
+
+Horseback riding was Leopold's chief pleasure, and the chaplain had no
+sooner launched his threat, when Leopold opened the window and
+apparently jumped out. As the school-room was situated in the third
+story, the teacher thought his pupil dead on the pavement below, but
+Leopold was merely hanging on to the stone coping and shutters. That
+gave him the whip hand over the teacher. "I will let go if you don't
+promise not to inform mother," demanded the twelve-year-old boy.
+
+"I promise, only come in," moaned the teacher.
+
+"Promise furthermore there shall be no punishment whatever for what I
+did and said."
+
+"None whatever, your Imperial Highness."
+
+"Swear it on the cross."
+
+The chaplain did as ordered and Leopold crawled back to safety.
+
+Leopold is a good deal like me, and has been in hot water more or less
+all his life.
+
+When I was a girl of fifteen, he defended my honor at the risk of the
+fearful punishments my mother had in store for those children that
+wouldn't buckle down to the chaplain, but that is so sad a chapter of my
+girlhood days I cannot bring myself to put it down today.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI
+
+LEOPOLD DEFENDS MY HONOR AT HIS PERIL
+
+    Punished for objecting to familiarities--Awful names I was
+    called--Locked in the room with wicked teacher--Defend myself with
+    burning lamp--My brother nearly kills my would-be assailant.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _April 2, 1893_.
+
+I want to finish with evil recollections. Maybe I will be able to forget
+them, when I have done with this narrative. My mother, as pointed out,
+had more confidence in our rascally court chaplain than in her own
+children, and was far more concerned about the chaplain's dignity than
+ours. She never hesitated to doubt her children's veracity, but regarded
+all the chaplain said as gospel truth.
+
+About two weeks before Easter, 1885, the time when I was just budding
+into young womanhood, the chaplain began to pay me a great deal of
+attention. The lessons he gave me to learn were insignificant compared
+with those of my brothers and sisters, and it mattered not whether I
+came to school prepared or otherwise. The strict disciplinarian had all
+of a sudden turned lenient. He began to pat my hair, to give me friendly
+taps on the shoulder, and never took his eyes off me. I was too young
+and innocent to see the true significance of his strange behavior, but
+I woke up suddenly and ran crying to my mother, telling her what had
+happened.
+
+"I won't take another lesson from that man, unless my lady-in-waiting is
+present," I sobbed.
+
+"You are a malicious, lying, low-minded creature," hissed my mother, at
+the same time striking me in the face with her big diamonds. "It's
+mortal sin to throw suspicion on so holy a man, and I will not have him
+watched."
+
+I ran out of mother's room crying, intending to go to papa, but met the
+boys in the corridor, who told me that father had just departed for the
+chase. Then I took Leopold aside and told him everything. He was
+half-mad with rage and was hardly able to articulate when he rushed to
+mother's room demanding protection for me.
+
+"I will protect the holy man instead," answered my fanatic mother.
+"Louise shall be locked in the room with the chaplain while she has her
+lesson." And my mother actually carried out that wicked design inspired
+by fanaticism.
+
+Locked in a room with me, the chaplain was sweetness itself, but for a
+while at least remained at a distance. When he attempted to approach me,
+I seized the burning kerosene lamp, as Leopold had advised.
+
+"One step more," I cried excitedly, "and I will throw the lamp in your
+face."
+
+The coward stood still in his tracks, and began whispering to me in a
+hoarse voice things I hardly understood, but that nevertheless wounded
+me to the quick. I kept my hand at the burning lamp during the whole
+hour and was ready to faint when the fiend at last left me.
+
+As the door opened, I saw Leopold standing outside, an enormous dog whip
+in hand. Without a word he applied the whip to the chaplain's broad
+face, lashing him right and left. The scoundrel offered no resistance,
+but fled like the dog he was, Leopold after him through the long
+corridors, upstairs and downstairs, through the picture gallery and the
+state apartments, lashing him as he ran, the two of them filling the
+palace with cries of rage and pain. Only the fact that Leopold stumbled
+over a footstool, enabled the chaplain to reach his room alive, where he
+barricaded himself.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII
+
+PRINCES AND PRINCESSES DANCE TO THE TUNE OF THE WHIP
+
+    The result shows in the character of rulers--Why English kings and
+    princes are superior to the Continental kind--Leopold's awful
+    revenge--Mother acts the tigress--Her mailed fist--"I forbid Your
+    Imperial Highness to see that dog."
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _April 21, 1893_.
+
+If my Diary ever fell into plebeian hands, I suppose such stories as the
+above would be branded as rank exaggerations.
+
+A Queen endangering life and health of her children by a form of
+punishment otherwise known only in the prize ring.
+
+An Imperial Highness using her diamonds to graft scars on the cheeks of
+a little girl!
+
+Royal children beaten worse than dogs, deprived of sleep, subjected to
+cold and damp and, withal, given over, bound hand and foot, so to speak,
+to the tender mercies of low-minded, unworthy, and even dangerous
+persons without manners or education.
+
+And, to cap the climax, a Royal maid in the first blush of budding
+womanhood grossly repulsed and physically attacked when she appeals to
+her mother for protection; that child locked in a room with her would-be
+ravisher and obliged to defend her honor by a threat of murder.
+
+Only the uninitiated--men and women living outside the pale of royal
+courts--will deem such things impossible. Let me tell these happy
+ignoramuses that all through the nineteenth century the princes and
+princesses of Europe were brought up to the tune of the whip and of
+physical and mental humiliation. It was the fashion.
+
+The only eminent monarch of the immediate past--Frederick the Great--was
+all but flayed alive by his father when a boy and young man,--emulate
+the second King of Prussia's brutalities and your offspring will be
+destined for greatness, argued princes.
+
+The first Emperor William of Germany had a gentle mother, my famous
+namesake; he was always a gentleman. The Russian Czars, Paul, Nicholas
+I, and Alexander III, were brought up with the knout, their preceptors
+used the boys at their sweet pleasure. The first turned out a madman;
+the second a brute; the third his people's executioner.
+
+Czar Paul would run a mile to cane a soldier who had a speck of dust on
+his boots. My grand-uncle, Emperor Francis Joseph of Austria, sometimes
+travels tens of miles to box the ears of a member of his family.
+
+Francis Joseph had a cruel bringing up.
+
+At the Royal Library in Berlin I saw the manuscript of _Les Memoires de
+ma vie: la princesse de Prusse, Frederice Sophie Wilhelmine, qui epousa
+le Margrave de Bayreuth_,--the original, unedited save by the
+corrections of the authoress. A good many passages of this "most
+terrible indictment of royalty" reminded me of home. There is even a
+parallel, or a near-parallel, of my own case just recorded. The Princess
+Wilhelmina's all-powerful governess was Madame Leti, who pummelled the
+child "as if she had been her mother." This Leti was undoubtedly a
+Sadist; to inflict torture, to practice refined cruelties was a joy to
+her. Not content with whipping the little girl, she added, shortly
+before her dismissal, some poisonous matter to Wilhelmina's wash water
+"that gnawed the skin and made my face all coppery and inflamed my
+eyes." This species of wickedness, at last, resulted in the discharge of
+Leti, "but she decided to leave me a few souvenirs in the shape of
+fisticuffs and kicks. She had told my mother that I was suffering from
+nose bleed and punched my nose whenever she was unobserved. During the
+last week of her stay at the palace I sometimes bled like an ox, and my
+arms and legs were blue, green and yellow from her kicks and cuffs. I am
+sure if she could have broken my legs with impunity, she would not have
+hesitated a moment to do so."
+
+History and the court gossip of the day afford plenty of precedents for
+what happened to me and my brothers and sisters in Salzburg. Indeed,
+Prince Albert, Consort of the late Queen Victoria, was the only royal
+father of the first half of the century that used the rod in moderation.
+To my mind that is one of the reasons why English kings and princes are
+so far superior to the Continental kind.
+
+But to return to Salzburg.
+
+Leopold had it all his own way for a quarter of an hour, as none of the
+servants would interfere in favor of the hated chaplain and mother was
+engaged in her oratory in a far away part of the castle. So my brother
+kicked in the door and went for the cowering brute again, raining
+stripes on every part of his bloated body, alternately using the whip
+and the whip-end. Undoubtedly Leopold would have killed him then and
+there if his boy's strength had not given out. He left him more dead
+than alive, bleeding and moaning.
+
+I will never forget the spectacle when Leopold came down the stairs
+after leaving the chaplain's room. I and my brothers and sisters were
+huddled together behind our ladies in the blue ante-chamber. A dozen or
+more lackeys stood in the corridor, whispering.
+
+Leopold's face was deathly pale as he descended the stairs, and blood
+was dripping from his whip, reddening the white linen runners
+protecting the carpet. He wore his army uniform, that should have saved
+him from violence at any rate. At that moment I prayed my sincerest that
+father would come home. I would have thrown myself on my knees and told
+everything, servants or no servants. But mother came instead.
+
+She was fully informed and she sprang upon poor Leopold like a tigress,
+knocking him from one end of the corridor to the other with her
+diamond-mailed fist. It was terrible, and all of us children cried aloud
+with terror. But the more we cried and the more we begged for mercy, the
+harder were the blows mother rained upon poor Leopold's face and head.
+His blood spattered over the white enameled banisters and doors until
+finally he was dragged out of my mother's clutches by an old footman who
+placed his broad back between the Imperial Highness and her victim.
+
+Now, it was the rule in our house that the whipped child had to ask our
+mother's forgiveness for putting her to the trouble of wielding the
+terrible back of her hand.
+
+Six weeks Leopold stayed at Salzburg after the scene described, and
+daily my mother urged him to beg her forgiveness. The boy stood
+stockstill on these occasions, never twitching a muscle of his face and
+never saying a word in reply. During all these six weeks he waited on
+mother morning, noon and night, according to ceremony, but never a word
+escaped him, never did he look in her direction unless actually forced
+to do so. He played the deaf and dumb to perfection.
+
+Father must have thought that Leopold got enough punishment, for he
+never mentioned the matter to him and forbade the servants to even
+allude to the court chaplain. Mother, on her part, placed the chaplain
+in charge of two skilled surgeons and sent every little while to inquire
+how he was doing.
+
+On the third day she said to my father at table, that she was going to
+pay a visit to the court chaplain.
+
+"I forbid your Imperial Highness to see that dog," said my father in an
+icy voice that brooked no reply. "I will have his carcass thrown out of
+here as soon as his condition permits."
+
+That was the only time I heard father speak like a sovereign and man.
+
+That Leopold nearly killed the scoundrel, as he promised to do, is
+evident from the fact that the court chaplain lay in the castle three
+weeks before he could be transported to a monastery. Some monks--for
+none of the servants would lend a helping hand--carried him away by
+night and none of the children ever saw or heard of our tormentor again.
+
+The only sorry reminder of the episode is the estrangement of Leopold
+and our mother. Though mother tried her hardest to win back the boy's
+confidence and affection, he remained an iceberg towards her,
+ceremonious but cold, polite but wholly indifferent.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII
+
+PLANNING TO GET A HUSBAND FOR ME
+
+    Dissecting possible wooers at Vienna--Royalty after money, not
+    character--"He is a Cohen, not a Coburg"--Prince who looked like a
+    Jew counter-jumper in his Sunday best--Balkan princes tabooed by
+    Francis Joseph--A good time for the girls--Army men commanded to
+    attend us.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _April 25, 1893_.
+
+A change of scene. I was eighteen and my parents were anxious to get a
+husband for me. Royalty marries off its princes at an early age to keep
+them out of mischief; its princesses as soon as a profitable suitor
+turns up or can be secured by politics, diplomacy, the exercise of
+parental wits or the powerful influence of the head of the House.
+
+Sister Anna, now Princess John of Hohenlohe, myself and mother were
+invited to Vienna. It was my introduction to royal pomp and
+circumstance. The _Hofburg_, our town lodging, seemed to me the first
+and also the last cry in sumptuousness--all that was beautiful and
+expensive in days gone by is there, and all that is new and desirable is
+there, too; Schoenbrunn, the Imperial summer residence, is a dream of
+loveliness wedded to grandeur. Between the Emperor and my mother and
+between her and the numerous archduchesses and archdukes every second
+word uttered referred to me as the possible wife of someone or another.
+And that someone was well dissected as to fortune, success in life and
+political exigencies.
+
+Whether he was good-looking or a monkey in face and figure mattered not.
+Health, good character, uprightness didn't count.
+
+Has he expectations for gaining a throne? Will he be wise enough to
+retain that throne? What kind of an establishment will he be able to set
+up? How long may his parents live, hanging on to the family
+fortune?--These were the only considerations deemed worthy of
+discussion.
+
+Three or four of the archduchesses seemed to be acting as marriage
+brokers for Ferdinand, just elected hereditary prince of Bulgaria, whose
+mother, Princess Clementine, a daughter of the dethroned King Louis
+Philippe of France, was reputed to be rolling in gold.
+
+Leopold irreverently called Ferdinand's partisans "_Fillons_" after
+famous "_La Fillon_," who supplied the harem of our jolly ancestor, the
+Regent of France, Duke of Orleans, and he insisted that Ferdinand was a
+_Cohen_, not a Coburg. As a matter of fact, Ferdinand's great fortune is
+derived from a Kohary, which is Hungarian for Cohen. The original Kohary
+was a cattle-dealer, who supplied the armies of the Allies during the
+Napoleonic wars. In this way he accumulated so much wealth that an
+impoverished Coburg prince fell in love with his daughter and made her
+his wife, after she exchanged the name of Rebecca for Antonie and the
+Mosaic faith for that of Rome.
+
+Young and proud and flippant as I was, Leopold's talk filled me with
+hearty contempt for the "Coburger" long before we were introduced. And
+as to his ambassador, who was forever dancing attendance upon me, I
+hated him. Yet the Imperial "_Fillons_" kept up their clatter, and one
+fine morning Prince Ferdinand was announced.
+
+He wasn't half bad looking, but struck me as too much of a mother's-boy.
+Princess Clementine seemed to decide everything for him. Anyhow, I
+wouldn't have him and he marched off again.
+
+I next reviewed, as another Balkan matrimonial possibility, Prince
+Danilo of Montenegro, a small, thin person, looking like a Jew
+counter-jumper in holiday dress--Vienna "store-clothes."
+
+Danilo spoke the worst _table d'hote_ French I ever heard in my life,
+and I told mother I would rather marry a rich banker than this crowned
+idiot. For once she agreed with me and said his father was only a
+"mutton-thief," anyhow.
+
+Finally there was talk of King Alexander of Servia, six years younger
+than I. Queen Natalie, who a few days ago celebrated one of her several
+reunions with ex-King Milan, spoke feelingly of her "Sasha" to mother,
+lauding him as the best of sons and the most promising of sovereigns,
+but the oft-divorced Majesty was less communicative when mother asked
+how many millions she would pass over to Alexander on his marriage day.
+That settled "Sasha's" ambitions as far as my hand was concerned. Marry
+a Balkan King and the _nee_ Keshko holding the purse-strings! Not for my
+father's daughter! I didn't want to marry into a Russian Colonel's
+family, anyhow. I believe Queen Natalie's father was a colonel, or was
+he only a lieutenant-colonel?
+
+These marriage negotiations aside, Anna and myself had a mighty good
+time in Vienna (I forgot to say that Emperor Francis Joseph agreed with
+me that Danilo and Alexander were quite impossible and that henceforth
+Balkan marriages should be taboo).
+
+"I have ordered a dozen young officers to report for tonight's dancing,"
+said my Imperial uncle one evening. "Select from among them your tennis
+partners, girls." Baron Cambroy of the Guards was my choice, and a
+mighty handsome fellow he is. He seemed pleased when I commanded him to
+tennis duty every afternoon during our stay. He is tall and spare in
+appearance and I might have fallen in love with him sooner, but for his
+dark skin. I am an Italian and, by way of contrast, prefer blondes to
+any other sort of man.
+
+Anna, myself and our ladies bicycled to the tennis court every
+afternoon, and on our way back to the castle were escorted by the Baron
+and the other officers.
+
+Trust a girl with a dress reaching an inch below her knees to find out
+scandals! On the second day after our meeting with the Baron, Anna told
+me that he was the lover of Draga Maschin, lady-in-waiting to Queen
+Natalie of Servia.[4]
+
+Draga was in attendance upon Queen Natalie when she called on us, a
+beautiful girl, somewhat too full-bosomed for an unmarried one, like my
+great-aunt, Catharine, who became the wife of that upstart, Jerome
+Napoleon. At home we have her picture, and mother, who was rather skinny
+as a girl, never failed to point out that it was painted before Queen
+Catharine's marriage, despite her voluptuous bust.
+
+If my Baron was really Draga's beloved, that would more than half
+explain mother's puzzle.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 4: The same who afterwards became the Queen of King Alexander
+of Servia and eventually the cause of his death and of the extinction of
+the Obrenovitsch dynasty. Alexander and Draga were both slaughtered in
+their beds May 29, 1903, ten years after the above was written.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX
+
+LOVE-MAKING
+
+    The fascinating Baron--The man's audacity--Putting the question
+    boldly--Real love-making--_Risque_ stories for royalty.
+
+
+    CASTLE WACHWITZ, _May 1, 1893_.
+
+I am in love but, like a prudent virgin, I admitted the fact to myself
+only shortly before we departed for Salzburg. After I put several
+hundred miles between me and my fascinating Baron, all's well again.
+
+My first love, and it was the man's audacity that won the day!
+
+Imagine an Imperial Highness, decidedly attractive, eighteen, and no
+tigress by any means, wheeling at the side of a mere lieutenant who has
+nothing but his pay to bless himself with and nothing but good looks to
+recommend him. And, as before stated, he wasn't even my style.
+
+Anna pedalled ahead some twenty-five paces; our ladies wheezed and
+snorted that many behind. This devil of a lieutenant took a chance.
+
+"Imperial Highness," he commenced, "I wager you don't know what love
+is."
+
+It was the one theme I was aching for, scenting, as I did, the odor of
+forbidden things. Never before had I the opportunity.
+
+"R-e-a-l love," he insisted.
+
+"Do you blame me?" I asked, vixen-like. "Would be a poor specimen of
+Guard officer who didn't know more about real love than a mere girl of
+eighteen and a princess at that."
+
+"Will your Imperial Highness allow me to explain?" This, oh so
+insinuatingly, from the gay seducer.
+
+"Why not?" I asked, with the air of a _roue_ and hating myself for
+blushing like a poppy--I felt it.
+
+"Charmed to enlighten you--with your Imperial Highness's permission,"
+whispered the Baron, his knee crowding mine as he drew nearer on his
+wheel.
+
+"Explain away."
+
+"Not until I have your Imperial Highness's express command and your
+promise not to get angry if I should offend."
+
+Anna, always an _enfant terrible_ and invariably in the way, was waiting
+for us in the shadow of a tree and now rode by the Baron's side. She had
+evidently heard part of our conversation.
+
+"Permission and pardon granted beforehand," she cried. "Go ahead."
+
+The Baron looked at me, and not to be outdone by the parcel of
+impudence in short petticoats, I said carelessly: "Oh, tell. I command."
+
+The Baron began to stroke his moustache and then related a story of
+Napoleon and our ancestress Marie Louise, the Austrian Archduchess, not
+found in school books.
+
+On the day before her entry into Paris, he said, and when they were
+destined to meet for the first time, Napoleon waylaid his bride-to-be at
+Courcelles and without ceremony entered her carriage. They rushed past
+villages, through towns _en fete_ and at last, at nine o'clock in the
+evening, reached the palace of Compiegne. There the Emperor cut short
+the addresses of welcome, presentations and compliments, and taking
+Marie Louise by the hand conducted her to his private apartments. Next
+morning they had breakfast in bed. The marriage ceremony took place a
+few days later.
+
+"That's love," said the Baron, shooting significant glances at me.
+
+"Henry _Quatre_ did the same to Marie de Medici--an Italian like you,
+Imperial Highness."
+
+Anna didn't know what to make of it, and as for me, my tongue stuck to
+the roof of my mouth.
+
+The impudent fellow seems to have misinterpreted our silence, for,
+brazen like the _Duc de_ Richelieu, who boasted of sleeping in the beds
+of queens, he continued:
+
+"Catharine the Great, too, knew what love was. One fine afternoon when
+she wasn't a day older than you, Imperial Highness, she looked out of
+the window of her room at Castle Peterhof. In the garden below a
+sentinel, very handsome, very Herculean, very brave, was pacing up and
+down. Catharine, then Imperial Grand-duchess and only just married, made
+a sign to the soldier. The giant, abandoning his rifle, jumped below the
+window and Catharine jumped onto his shoulders from the second story.
+
+"That's real love," concluded the Baron.
+
+Anna got frightened and fled down the avenue, but I had the weakness to
+remain at the Baron's side until we reached the palace.
+
+Alas, Frederick Augustus wasn't as good a talker as the Baron.
+
+[Illustration: FREDERICK AUGUSTUS, REIGNING KING OF SAXONY
+
+Louise's Ex-Husband]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X
+
+MY POPULARITY RENDERS GEORGE DYSPEPTIC
+
+    The Cudgel-Majesty--Prince George's intrigues--No four-horse coach
+    for Princess--Popular demonstration in my favor--"All-highest"
+    displeasure.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _September 1, 1893_.
+
+I haven't lived up to my promise to keep a daily record, or even a
+weekly one. Those tales of my girlhood days disgusted me with diary
+keeping as far as my early experiences at home went and I reflected that
+many of the subsequent happenings in my life might be safer in the
+shrine of memory, than spread over the pages of a blank-book, even
+though no one sees it and I carry its golden key on a chain around my
+neck.
+
+We are back in the capital now and things are moving. Great doings had
+been planned for our reception, for the re-entry of the little prince,
+my baby, and his mother who is expected to give another child to Saxony
+at the end of the year. Two babies in one year! I am going to beat the
+German Empress, and if Wilhelm doesn't send me a medal I will cut him
+dead the next time I see him!
+
+Well, about that reception. Flags, triumphal arches, speeches by the
+burgo-master, white-robed virgins at the station and all that sort of
+thing!
+
+But Father-in-law George said "no." Anything that gives joy to others
+goes against his royal grain, gives him politico-economic dyspepsia. He
+doesn't want me to be popular,--neither me, nor Frederick Augustus, nor
+the baby.
+
+George will be the next king, and if the Dresdeners or the Saxons want
+to "_Hoch the King_," they must "_Hoch_" George. They MUST. "It's their
+damned duty," says George the Pious, who never blasphemes on his own
+account, but allows himself some license concerning his subjects. His
+attitude recalls the story told of Frederick William the First of
+Prussia, whose appearance on the streets of Berlin used to cause
+passers-by to run to save their back. Upon one occasion His Majesty
+caught one of these fugitives, and whacking him over the head with his
+Spanish reed, cried angrily: "What do you want to run away from me for?"
+
+"Because I'm afraid of your Royal Majesty," stuttered the poor devil.
+
+"Afraid?" thundered Frederick William, giving the fellow another whack
+with his cane. "Afraid?"--the beating continuing--"when I, your King,
+commanded you to love me. Love me, you miserable coward, love God's
+Anointed." And the loving Majesty broke his cane on the unloving
+subject's back.
+
+Two days before our arrival Prince George sent his adjutant, Baron de
+Metsch-Reichenbeck, to the Mayor of Dresden, stopping all reception
+arrangements contemplated.
+
+To have children was a mere picnic to Her Imperial Highness, lied
+George's messenger,--if the physicians hadn't used chloroform I would
+have perished with the torture. Ovations intended as a sort of reward or
+recognition of my services to the country, then, would be entirely out
+of place, and must not be thought of.
+
+The municipality thereupon officially abandoned preparations. I was a
+little vexed when I first heard about George's meanness, yet again felt
+tickled that he went out of his way to intrigue against me, the despised
+little princess of a House that ceased to reign. And I had an idea that
+the Dresdeners would give us a good welcome anyhow.
+
+I had contemplated ordering my special train to leave in the early
+morning or at noon, but the Ministry of Railways informed me that it was
+impossible to accommodate me at the hours mentioned.
+
+"We will take the ordinary express, then, and will be in Dresden at four
+in the afternoon," I suggested.
+
+"According to the new schedule, the express doesn't stop in Dresden,"
+protested Frederick Augustus.
+
+"We will command it to stop," I cried.
+
+Frederick Augustus looked at me as if I had asked him to borrow twenty
+marks from the Kaiser. "For God's sake!" he cried, "don't you know what
+happened to John the other day?"
+
+I confessed my ignorance.
+
+"Well," said Frederick Augustus, "John ordered the Continental express
+to pick him up at his garrison, and he had no sooner arrived in Dresden
+than he was commanded by the King to appear before him. His Majesty
+walked all over John, accusing him of 'interfering with international
+traffic' and forbidding him to issue another order of that character."
+
+"Pshaw!" I said, "John is merely a childless princeling. I am the mother
+of Saxony's future king. The regeneration, the perpetuation of your race
+depends on me."
+
+It was a mere waste of breath, for at that moment came a telegram,
+announcing that our special was billed to leave at 3:30, getting us to
+Dresden at half-past five--King's orders.
+
+"Did you command the _Daumont_ coach-and-four to meet us at the
+station?" I asked.
+
+"My dear child, you are dreaming," replied Frederick Augustus. "The
+State carriages are the property of the Crown and we don't own a
+four-horse team in Dresden. They will send the ordinary royal carriage,
+I suppose."
+
+I was mad enough to wish my husband's family to Hades, the whole lot of
+them, but the people of Dresden took revenge in hand and dealt most
+liberally. Of course, having fixed our arrival at a late and unusual
+hour, George expected there would be no one to welcome us, but the great
+concourse of people that actually assembled at the station and in the
+adjacent streets, lining them up to the palace gates, was tremendous
+instead.
+
+One more disappointment. George had sent an inconspicuous, narrow
+_coupe_ to the station,--the Dresdeners shouldn't see more than the
+point of my nose. I saw through his scheme the moment I clapped eyes on
+that mouse-trap of a vehicle standing at the curb.
+
+And then I remembered the brilliant stagecraft of August the Physical
+Strong--he of the three hundred and fifty-two--and how he always managed
+to focus everybody's eyes on himself. And I stood stockstill on the
+broad, red-carpeted terrace when I walked out of the waiting room and
+held up my baby in the face of the multitude. You could hear the
+"_Hochs_" and Hurrahs all over town, they said. Hats flew in the air,
+handkerchiefs waved, flags were thrust out of the windows of the houses.
+
+"What are you doing, Imperial Highness?" whispered _Fraeulein von_
+Schoenberg, my lady-in-waiting.
+
+"Never mind, I will carry the baby to the carriage," I answered curtly.
+
+"But the King and Prince George will be angry,--everything will be
+reported to them."
+
+"I sincerely hope it will," I said.
+
+And before I entered that petty _souriciere_ of a royal coach, I danced
+the baby above my head time and again, giving everybody a chance to see
+him. And as I stood there in the midst of this tumult of applause, this
+waving sea of good-will, this thunder of jubilation, I felt proud and
+happy as I never did before. And when the thought struck me how mad
+George would feel about it all, I had to laugh outright.
+
+I was still grinning to myself when I heard Frederick Augustus's
+troubled voice: "Get in, what are you standing around here for?"--These
+manifestations of popularity spelt "all-highest" displeasure to him,
+poor noodle. He anticipated the scene at the palace, George fuming and
+charging "play to the gallery," the Queen in tears, the King threatening
+to banish us from Dresden.
+
+"Be it so," I said to myself, "we might as well be hanged for a sheep as
+a lamb." And I refused to enter the carriage until I had waved and
+smiled profound thanks to everybody in the square and in the windows and
+on the balconies of the surrounding houses.
+
+I saw the Master of Horse address the coachman and immediately divined
+his purpose. So I pulled at the rope and commanded the coachman to drive
+slowly. I said it in my most imperious manner, and the Master of Horse
+dared not give the counter order with which Prince George had charged
+him. Poor man, his failure to subordinate my will to his, or George's,
+cost him his job.
+
+And so we made our royal entry into Dresden amid popular rejoicings. I
+glued my face to the carriage window and smiled and smiled and showed
+the baby to everyone who asked for the boon.
+
+Baby took it all in a most dignified fashion. He neither squalled nor
+kicked, but seemed to enjoy the homage paid him.
+
+When we reached the palace there was another big crowd of well-wishers,
+who shouted themselves hoarse for Louise and the baby, and, malicious
+thing that I am, I noticed with pleasure that it all happened under
+George's windows.
+
+"This will give father-in-law jaundice," said baby's nurse in Italian.
+She is a girl from Tuscany and very devoted to me.
+
+"If he dies, I will be Queen the sooner," thought I,--but happily I
+didn't think aloud.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI
+
+SCOLDED FOR BEING POPULAR
+
+    Entourage spied upon by George's minions--My husband proves a
+    weakling--I disavow the personal compliment--No more intelligent
+    than a king should be.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _September 5, 1893_.
+
+I wrote the foregoing at one sitting, without interruption. It's not so
+easy a matter to put down the consequences of our triumph, or rather
+mine and baby's.
+
+When I entered my apartments, I met a whole host of long faces. The
+Commander of the Palace, in great gala, offered a most stiff and icy
+welcome. The adjutants, the chamberlains, the _maitre d'Hotel_, all
+looked ill at ease. They evidently felt the coming storm in their bones
+and didn't care to have it said of them, by George's spies, that they
+lent countenance, even in a most remote way, to my carryings-on. Even
+the Schoenberg--my own woman--shot reproachful glances at me when the
+Commander of the Palace happened to look her way.
+
+Frederick Augustus looked and acted as if he was to be deprived of all
+his military honors.
+
+"Your courage must have fallen into your _cuirassier_ boots, look for it
+there," I said to him in an undertone when he seemed ready to go to
+pieces at the entrance of the King's grand marshal, Count Vitzthum.
+
+With that I advanced towards His Excellency and, holding out my hand to
+be kissed, took care to say to him with my most winning smile,
+
+"I trust His Majesty will be pleased with me, for of course our grand
+reception was but a reflex of the love the people have for their King. I
+never for a moment took it as a personal compliment."
+
+My smart little speech disconcerted the official completely. Maybe he
+had orders to say something disagreeable, but my remark disarmed him,
+forestalled any quarrel that might have been in the King's or Prince
+George's mind.
+
+Frederick Augustus, who is no more intelligent than a future king should
+be, was so amazed, he had to think hard and long before he could even
+say "Good evening" to the Count. As for the latter, he hawed and coughed
+and stammered and cleared his throat until finally he succeeded in
+delivering himself of the following sublime effort:
+
+"I will have the honor to report to His Majesty that during the time of
+your Imperial Highness's entry, your Imperial Highness thought of
+naught but the all-highest approval of His Majesty."
+
+Whereupon I shook his hand again and dismissed him. "It will please me
+immensely, Count," I said, "immensely."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII
+
+ROYAL DISGRACE--LIGHTNING AND SHADOWS
+
+    Ordered around by the Queen--Give thanks to a bully--Jealous of the
+    "mob's" applause--"The old monkey after '_Hochs_'"--Criticizing the
+    "old man"--Royalty's plea for popularity--Proposed punishments for
+    people refusing to love royalty.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _September 8, 1893_.
+
+Thrice twenty-four hours of royal disgrace and I am--alive. This
+morning: "All-highest order," signed by Her Majesty's Dame of the
+Palace, Countess von Minckwitz: "The Queen is graciously pleased to
+invite your Imperial Highness to audience."
+
+Of course her pleasure is a command. I dressed in state and ordered all
+the ladies and gentlemen of my court to attend me to the royal chambers.
+
+Queen Carola was very nice, giving the impression that she would be more
+lovely still if she dared.
+
+"Prince George has just commanded your husband," she said,--"the King
+ordered this condescension on my brother-in-law's part. You will have to
+thank him for it."
+
+Isn't it amusing to be an Imperial Highness and a Crown Princess to be
+ordered around like a "boots" and to be "commanded" like an orphan
+child to say thanks to one's betters!
+
+I promised and the Queen, assuming that I intended to act the good
+little girl, took courage to say--for she is the biggest of
+cowards--"You are too popular, Louise. Such a reception as you had! All
+the papers, even the Jew-sheets, are full of it."
+
+And before I could make any excuses for my popularity she added in
+sorrowful, half-accusing tones: "I lived here ever so many years and the
+mob never applauded _me_."
+
+"It's so fickle," I quoted. I had to say something, you know.
+
+"And contemptible," added the Queen heartily. "But how is baby?"
+
+I begged permission to send for him. Her Majesty was pleased to play
+with the little one for a minute or two and that secured me a gracious
+exit. The Queen attended me to the door, opening it with her own royal
+hand, thereby rehabilitating me with my entourage waiting outside.
+
+Meanwhile Frederick Augustus had a "critical quarter of an hour" with
+father-in-law, who assumed to speak on behalf of the King.
+
+"The King," he said, "despised 'playing to the gallery' worse than the
+devil hated holy water." (This court is overrun with Jesuits, and we
+must needs adopt their vernacular.)
+
+The King, he repeated, thought it very bad taste for anyone to take the
+centre of the stage in these "popularity-comedies," and he told a lot
+more lies of the same character. Then he bethought himself of his own
+grieved authority.
+
+"Tell your wife," he said, "that I, her father-in-law, and next to the
+throne, do everything in my power to escape such turbulent scenes, and
+that I would rather ride about town in an ordinary _Droschke_ (cab) of
+the second class, preserving my incognito, than in a state carriage and
+be the object of popular acclamation."
+
+When Frederick Augustus repeated the above with the most solemn face in
+the world, I thought I would die with laughter and actually had to send
+for my tire-woman to let my corset out a few notches.
+
+"The old monkey," I cried--"as if he wasn't after '_Hochs_' morning,
+noon and night; as if he thought of anything else when he mounts a
+carriage or his horse."
+
+"You forget yourself, Louise," warned Frederick Augustus in the voice of
+an undertaker, and I really think he meant it. But I wasn't in the mood
+to be silenced.
+
+"And as if I didn't know that, like Kaiser Wilhelm, he keeps a record of
+towns and villages that were never honored by one of his visits,
+intending to make his ceremonial entry there at the first plausible
+opportunity."
+
+"It isn't true," insisted Frederick Augustus.
+
+Then I got angry. "It may be thought polite in the bosom of your family
+to call one another a liar," I retorted, "but don't you get into the
+habit of introducing those tap-room manners in the _menage_ of an
+Imperial Highness of Austria. I forbid it."
+
+And then I gave rein to some of the bitterness that had accumulated in
+my heart against the old man. Didn't I know that George was mad enough
+to quarrel with his dinner when, on his drives about town, he observed a
+single person refusing to salute him? And wasn't it a fact that the
+Socialists had combined never more to raise their hats to him just
+because he insisted on it? And wasn't that one of the reasons why the
+government was more hard on them than happened to be politic?
+
+"You mustn't say these things," pleaded Frederick Augustus.
+
+I pretended to melt. "May I not quote your father's own words?"
+
+"What my father says is always correct," replied the dutiful son.
+
+"Well, then, this is what he told House Minister von Seydowitz a couple
+of weeks ago: 'When I see one of these intending destroyers of the state
+and social order staring at me, hat on head and cigar in face, I doubly
+regret the good old times when kings and princes were at liberty to yank
+a scoundrel of that ilk to jail and immure him for life, giving him
+twenty-five stripes daily to teach him the desirableness of rendering
+unto Caesar that which is Caesar's.'"
+
+Frederick Augustus was holding his hands to his ears when I finished. He
+ran out and slammed the door behind him.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII
+
+UNSPEAKABLE LITTLENESSES OF PETTY COURTS
+
+    Another quarrel with my husband--Personal attendant to a
+    corpse--Killing by pin pricks--The mythical three "_How art
+    thou's?_"--Unwanted sympathy from my inferiors--Pride of the
+    decapitated Queen of France is in me--Lovers not impossible--Court
+    to blame for them--My husband acts cowardly--Brutalizes my
+    household--I lock myself in.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _December 1, 1893_.
+
+I saved myself the trouble to record events for two or three months. I
+expect my child by the end of the year and, believing in prenatal
+influence, it would be a shame, I think, to poison the unborn baby's
+mind by dwelling on the unspeakable littlenesses that make up and burden
+life at this petty court.
+
+But I may die in the attempt of presenting Saxony with another candidate
+for appanages and honors, and this threat, hanging over every expectant
+mother, makes me take up my pen again. If I perish, let there be a
+record of my sufferings and also of my defiance.
+
+It turned out that the Queen's and George's apparent acquiescence to my
+sinful popularity marked the deceitful calm before the storm. Frederick
+Augustus has not succeeded in gaining the King's and his father's
+forgiveness even now. As a military officer he is shunted from pillar to
+post, and the generals and high officials of the court treat him like a
+recruit in disgrace. Of course he blames me, shouting that I wrecked his
+career.
+
+As if a future king need care a rap whether, as prince, he got a
+regiment a few months earlier or later.
+
+"When you are King," I sometimes say to him, "you may nominate yourself
+Field-Marshal-General and Great-Admiral above and below the sea--what do
+you care?"
+
+"It isn't the same," he moans. "I would like to have my patents signed
+by uncle or father."
+
+"Antedate your papers," I advised, "who dare dispute the king? Didn't
+the Kaiser nominate himself Adjutant-General to his grand-dad long after
+William I lay mouldering in Charlottenburg?"
+
+But Frederick Augustus takes colonel-ships and his petty kingship of the
+future too seriously to see even the humor of appointing oneself
+personal attendant to a corpse.
+
+As for me, if I weren't _enceinte_, they would send me to some
+lost-in-the-woods country house to die of _ennui_. But respect for
+public opinion forbidding drastic measures, George relies on a Russian
+expedient to humble my proud self and force me to submit to his
+meddling.
+
+In the Czar's country, when a village resolves on the death of some
+obnoxious individual, they take him, or her, and bind the body naked to
+a tree. Then several papers of pins are distributed among the
+inhabitants, and each man, woman and child is asked to put a pin in the
+lady or gentleman, whom they must approach blindfolded. They stick the
+pin wherever they touch the body and if the thing leaks out are able to
+swear by all the saints that they don't know where it struck. The pin
+pricking is continued until the obnoxious one expires amid awful
+tortures and, while all contributed to the murder, none can be hanged
+for it.
+
+In like manner George and his minions are trying to reduce me to the
+position of social and political corpse.
+
+Court festivities and public acts, attended by the court, seem to be
+specially arranged to pillorize me and husband. We are invited, of
+course. We are next in importance to Prince George. Our entourage is
+more numerous and more richly costumed than that of the other princes.
+Four horse coaches for us; Ministers of State waiting on us. I have
+train-bearers, pages, what-not.
+
+But the King and Prince George cut me and Frederick Augustus in sight of
+the whole court, of the public in fact!
+
+I don't mean to say that the "All-highest Lords," as they call
+themselves, treat us as air, or offer insult plain to the ear and
+eye--they couldn't afford to--nevertheless the stigma of royal disfavor
+is stamped on us. This is the mode of proceedings: Ceremony obliges the
+King to address each member of the royal family with the words: "How do
+you do?", in the German fashion, "_How art thou?_"
+
+To princes and princesses that are in disgrace, this momentous question
+is put only once. Those in good standing are asked three times.
+
+Ever since that September day when all Dresden did me honor, the King
+and Prince George have said "_How art thou's?_" to me and mine but once,
+whenever and wherever we met, and be sure there were always listeners to
+report the double omission.
+
+At first it amused me; then enraged me; I don't care a fig now. But
+Frederick Augustus! Poor imbecile, he is eating his heart out about
+those two missing "_How art thou's?_" and though he looks splendid in
+gala uniform he acts in the royal, but ungracious, presence like a green
+recruit expecting to be kicked and cuffed by his noncommissioned officer
+on getting back to the barracks.
+
+As to my entourage, it surrenders to royal disfavor even as Frederick
+Augustus: depressed faces, pitying glances. I could box their ears for
+their sympathy.
+
+Am I not the great-granddaughter of that mighty Maria Theresa that ruled
+Austria and Hungary with an iron hand, lined with velvet. "_Moriamur pro
+rege nostro_" (We will die for our King), cried the Hungarians, when she
+appealed to their chivalry, her new-born babe at her breast. "_Rege_,"
+not "_Regina_." They called her King. They forgot the woman in the
+monarch, yet I am treated like an insipid female always, never as the
+Crown Princess!
+
+Let them beware. My full name is Louise Marie Antoinette. I was named
+after the Marie Antoinette of history--another ancestor of mine--and the
+pride of the decapitated Queen of France is in me! My namesake was
+satisfied when she read the Saint-Antoine placard of June 25, 1791:
+"Whosoever insults Marie Antoinette shall be caned, whosoever applauds
+her shall be hanged." Some day I will dismiss the cattle that now grudge
+me the people's applause and punish those that insult me.
+
+Come to think of it, Marie Antoinette had not only pride and defiance,
+she had lovers too. Well, some day this Marie Antoinette may have
+lovers, and if it's wrong, let the recording angel debit my sins to the
+Saxon court.
+
+Thank God, I am blessed with that truly royal attribute, ability to
+dissimulate. "_Qui nescit dissimulare nescit regnare_" was all the Latin
+Charles VIII knew, yet he made a pretty successful king for one who died
+at the age of twenty-seven.
+
+I always act as if the King, and father-in-law George, had asked me not
+once, or three times, but a dozen times "_How art thou?_" I don't know
+anything about being in disgrace, I don't anticipate being snubbed and
+when I am snubbed I don't see it.
+
+The "all-highest Lord" looks daggers at me--I curtsy and smile!
+
+Father-in-law Prince George exhibits the visage of a poisoned pole-cat
+at my table--I congratulate him on his good digestion!
+
+Majesty pays no more attention to my presence than if I was a pillar, or
+a lackey; I greet him with my most devoted genuflections, rise from the
+carpet smiling all over the face and begin a frivolous conversation with
+the nearest man at hand, who in his fright acts as if he had taken an
+overdose of physic.
+
+If Frederick Augustus only had an inch of backbone, a pinch of ginger in
+his constitution! But he always stands around with a red face and the
+mien of a penitent. No dog, accustomed to daily beatings, follows his
+master's movements with more anxious looks than the Crown Prince of this
+realm bestows upon the goings and sayings of the King and Prince George.
+
+Then, as recompense for his royal feast of toads, he plays the tyrant at
+home. Jellyfish in the state apartments, a brute in our own and--on the
+drill grounds, I am told! He is always finding fault with the servants,
+and cares not whether he calls his Court Marshal, or a groom,
+"_Lausbub_." Poor Chamberlain von Tumpling earned that scurvy epithet
+the other day and he prides himself on being a nobleman and an army
+officer! Only this morning the prince roared and bellowed at one of my
+ladies, I thought she would have a stroke from righteous anger and
+vexation.
+
+When he attempted to address me in the same fashion, I simply turned my
+back on him, went into my boudoir and locked the door. I will keep him
+"guessing" for two days, sending for the court physician every little
+while.
+
+When he has to eat his meals alone and sleep alone for twice twenty-four
+hours, it will occur even to him that Louise is not made of the stuff
+that stands for being bullied.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV
+
+IMPERIAL RUSSIAN ETHICS TRANSFERRED TO DRESDEN
+
+    My husband's reported escapade--Did he give diamonds to a dancing
+    girl?--His foolish excuses--"I am your pal"--A restaurant scene in
+    St. Petersburg--The birthday suit.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _December 3, 1893_.
+
+After all, Frederick Augustus has more spirit than I gave him credit
+for. Isabelle just told me that he has a new love, and a very appetizing
+piece of femininity she is, _Fraeulein_ Dolores of the Municipal Theatre.
+
+"She's as well made as you, Louise, and rather more graceful," she said,
+"only her expression is somewhat inert. She lacks animation. Of course,
+she hasn't your attractive bust."
+
+That devilish Isabelle _sowed_ her poisonous information rather than
+pronounced it. "She has been seen with a new diamond-studded _bandeau_,"
+she added.
+
+At that moment the Schoenberg came to say that baby wants me. Isabelle
+went along to the nursery, but I managed to take the Schoenberg aside.
+
+"I must know, before dinner, who gave the Dolores woman the new jewelry
+she is displaying; likewise whether His Royal Highness is sweet on that
+hussy. No half-truths, if you please. I want to know the worst if there
+be any."
+
+The Schoenberg has a cousin who is a Councillor in the office of the
+police president, and the police president keeps a detailed record of
+the love affairs of all the actresses and singers employed in
+Dresden,--a relic of the time when stage folks, in European capitals,
+classed as "the King's servants."
+
+The Councillor came himself to report and, after listening to what he
+said, I raised the boycott on Frederick Augustus without further ado,
+inviting him to my bed and board once more.
+
+"So you went slumming with Kyril," I said after we had retired for the
+night.
+
+"Who told you?" stammered the big fellow, reddening to the roots of his
+hair.
+
+"Never mind. I know all! About the Dolores woman, her brand new
+diamonds, the pirouettes she did on the table and the many lace
+petticoats she wore."
+
+"My word, I didn't count them," vowed his Royal Highness.
+
+"Neither would I advise you to do so," I warned sternly, though as a
+matter of fact I was near exploding with laughter. "Now make a clean
+breast of it."
+
+"I swear I was only the elephant. The King himself would excuse me
+under the circumstances," whimpered my husband.
+
+"You big booby," I interposed, "can't you see that I'm not angry? I blab
+about you to the King? What do you take me for? I am your pal, now and
+always, in affairs liable to prove inartistic to the King's, or Prince
+George's, stomach. To begin with, what has an elephant to do with
+supping with a dancing girl?"
+
+Frederick Augustus explained that the name of the pachyderm applies to a
+third party, who attends a couple out for a lark until he proves a
+crowd. Our cousin, Grand-duke Kyril of Russia, visiting Dresden
+incognito, had prevailed on Frederick Augustus's good nature to serve
+him and the Dolores.
+
+"The Dolores is prettier than I?" I inquired.
+
+"Not at all. She has a black mole under her left bosom."
+
+"You saw that?"
+
+"How could I help it? Russian Grand-dukes never allow a girl to wear
+corsets at supper. Kyril says it interferes with digestion."
+
+How considerate of His Russian Imperial Highness!
+
+Well, they had a good time and I guess the Dolores earned her diamonds.
+A fair exchange is no robbery. "But in St. Petersburg," said Frederick
+Augustus, "they do these things better." And he gave an elaborate
+description of a famous restaurant there, where the princes of the
+imperial family hold high carnival occasionally.
+
+"The upper tier of dining rooms is reserved at night for any Grand-duke
+who promises his visit," quoted my husband, "and the broad marble stairs
+leading to them must not be used by others. Well, one fine evening
+Grand-duke Vladimir and a crowd of nobles and officers supped at the
+'_Ermitaj_' and when they were all good and drunk, one of Vladimir's
+guests, Prince Galitzin, bet the host the price of the supper and a
+champagne bath for all, that he could induce the famous _danseuse_
+Mshinskaya to descend the stairs stark naked and walk among the tables
+below without anyone offering her insult.
+
+"The bet was accepted and the girl sent for. She was found in a near-by
+theatre and rushed to the '_Ermitaj_'. Of course, seeing that His
+Imperial Highness wished it, she consented to pull off the trick
+and--her clothes, but she made a condition."
+
+"She demanded tights," I suggested.
+
+"Pshaw, she is a sport, says Kyril." This in a tone of disgust from
+Frederick Augustus. He continued: "She merely begged his Imperial
+Highness to have it announced that she, Mshinskaya, was acting under the
+Grand-duke's orders. Done. 'By His Imperial Highness's leave,' shouted
+the _Maitre d'Hotel_ from the top of the stairs, as _Mademoiselle_
+descended in her birthday suit. And the Mshinskaya made the tour of the
+restaurant as unconcernedly and as little subject to protests, or
+remarks, as if she had been muffled up to her ears.
+
+"That's what I call freedom--discipline," concluded Frederick Augustus.
+"Think of doing anything like that in a Dresden restaurant."
+
+"I would gladly give a year's allowance to the poor if you could manage
+it here while Prince George was masticating a Hamburg steak at a table
+opposite the grand staircase," said I.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV
+
+ROYALTY NOT PRETTY, AND WHY
+
+    Fecundity royal women's greatest charm--How to have beautiful
+    children.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _February 25, 1894_.
+
+Behold the mother of two boys in a twelve-month! Frederick came just in
+the nick of time, Sylvester Eve (December 31, 1893), to gain me a little
+brief renown, for royalty likes its women to be rabbits and, in the
+reigning houses at least, we are esteemed in proportion to our
+fecundity.
+
+"January 15--December 31," not half bad! Even Prince George had to admit
+that. And the Kaiser remarked: "Louise, if she keeps it up, bids fair to
+break de Villeneuve's record. Let me see, Sophie's first child was born
+January 9--a girl" (with a sneer); "her next, the Hereditary Count, on
+December 28th of the same year."
+
+The "de Villeneuve" is Sophie, Countess of Schlitz. Wilhelm made her
+celebrated by his gallantries and Lenbach by the great portrait he
+painted of her wondrous loveliness. If I ever have a daughter, I will
+have a copy of the Lenbach canvas placed in baby's room. Come to think
+of it, I will have one made right away to hang in my own boudoir.
+
+As stated, I believe in prenatal influence, and am more than convinced
+that the portraits of Saxon and Prussian princesses frowning from the
+walls of our palaces are calculated neither to promote beauty nor
+gentleness.
+
+If I had my way, I would send the whole lot to the store-room and fill
+the space they occupy with the present store-room treasures, old time
+portraits of August the Physical Strong's favorites, Aurora von
+Koenigsmark, Countess Cosel, Princess Lubomirska, Fatime, the Circassian,
+the Orselska and--who can remember their names?
+
+As a rule, queens and princesses are conspicuous for lack of beauty,
+while kings and princes cut most ordinary figures in _mufti_. Only their
+uniforms, the ribands and decorations, the _mise-en-scene_ render them
+tolerable imitations of the average military man.
+
+Why?
+
+Because their mothers and fathers, their sisters, cousins and aunts see
+nothing but painted and photographed and sculptured frights and
+grotesques. So much ugliness of the past must needs cause ugliness of
+the present and future.
+
+In a century the thrones of Europe have known but two beauties, both
+plebeians, the Empress Josephine and the Empress Eugenie. My aunt, the
+Empress Elizabeth, is only good-looking, the German Empress was just an
+ordinary German _Frau_ even in her salad-days.
+
+Well, my little girls, if I have any, shall profit by the lessons of the
+past. As expectant mothers in ancient Greece were wont to walk in the
+temple of _Athene Parthenos_, filled with the greatest sculptures the
+world has ever seen (ruins of them I admired in the British Museum), so
+I intend to have a gallery of my own for beauty's sake, even if every
+female figure be a harlot's likeness.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI
+
+MORE JEALOUSIES OF THE GREAT
+
+    Men and women caress me with their eyes--Some disrespectful sayings
+    and doings of mine--First decided quarrel with Frederick Augustus--I
+    go to the theatre in spite of him.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 1, 1894_.
+
+I am afraid I wrote down some wicked things--wicked from the standpoint
+of the Saxon court--and though Queen Carola and father-in-law George
+know naught of my scribblings, punishment was meted out to me in full
+measure.
+
+Of course, it's my "damned popularity," as the King calls it, that got
+me into trouble again. My carriage happened to follow one occupied by
+the Queen at a distance of some hundred or more paces along the avenues
+of the _Grosser Garten_. I had no idea that Her Majesty was out at the
+time, and certainly was dressed to please the eye. I can't help it. It's
+a habit with me.
+
+Well, the optics of a good many of my future subjects grew long and
+cozening, like gipsies', when they beheld their queen-to-be; there was
+many a "flatteringly protracted, but never a wiltingly disapproving
+gaze," and those who liked me--and they all seemed to--shouted "Our
+Louise," and Hurrah. They shouted so loud that poor Queen Carola got
+plenty of auricular evidence of how her successor-to-be was loved by the
+people, by _her_, Carola's, people. And the poor old girl got so
+"peeved," she ordered her coachman to turn back and proceed to the
+palace by the shortest route, through the least frequented streets.
+
+Frederick Augustus knew all about it before I reached home and was in a
+terribly dejected state.
+
+"This has to stop," he said with a fine effort at imitating authority.
+"On Sunday, when we drove home from High Mass, you got an ovation while
+the King's carriage passed almost unnoticed. And now this affront to the
+Queen."
+
+"Bother the old girl," I replied, stamping my foot.
+
+Frederick Augustus got as white as a sheet. "That's the language of
+a--a--" He knew enough not to finish.
+
+"It's the title by which Queen Victoria is known to many of her
+subjects."
+
+"Who told you that?"
+
+"I often run across it in the English newspapers."
+
+"Jew-sheets!" roared Frederick Augustus.
+
+"Since you don't understand a word of English, you couldn't distinguish
+the London Times from the Hebrew At Work." After this sally, I added
+maliciously: "I'm going to the Opera Comique tonight. Come along?"
+
+"You are _not_ going to the Opera Comique," shouted Frederick Augustus.
+
+"You don't want me to go, papa don't want me to go, uncle and aunt and
+cousins don't? So many reasons more why I _shall_ go. I announced my
+coming and I will go, if I have to tear the ropes, by which you might
+bind me hand and foot, with my teeth."
+
+I rang the bell and ordered dinner served half an hour earlier than
+usual. Then I went to my dressing room to inspect the new gown that I
+intended to wear at the theatre.
+
+Girardi night! Girardi, the famous Vienna comedian! I never saw him. His
+humor will act as a tonic. Just what I need. I will die if I breathe
+none other but the air of this palace, that reeks with cheap
+pretensions, Jesuitical puritanism, envy and hatred, where every second
+person is a spy of either the King or George.
+
+I must escape the polluted atmosphere for a few hours, at least, and
+laugh, laugh, LAUGH.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    11:30 P.M.
+
+I have seen Girardi. I have laughed. I saw the Dolores. And I don't
+blame Kyril a bit.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII
+
+THE ROYAL PRINCE, WHO BEHAVES LIKE A DRUNKEN BRICKLAYER
+
+    I face the music, but my husband runs away--Prince George can't look
+    me in the eye--He roars and bellows--Advocates wife-beating--I defy
+    him--German classics--"Jew literature" _Auto da fe_ ordered.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 2, 1894_.
+
+Chamberlain Baron Haugk, of the service of Prince George, called at nine
+A.M. and insisted upon seeing me. I sent out my Grand-Mistress, Baroness
+von Tisch, to tell him that "Her Imperial Highness would graciously
+permit him to wait upon her at half past ten."
+
+"But my all-highest master commands."
+
+I was listening in my boudoir and I went out to him only half-dressed, a
+powder-mantle over my shoulders.
+
+"Her Imperial Highness will not have her commands questioned by
+servants," I said in my most haughty style. The _Kammerherr_ knocked his
+heels together, bowed to the ground and retired. That's my way of
+dealing with royal flunkeys, no matter what their title of courtesy.
+
+He was back at the stroke of the clock to announce his "sublime master"
+for one in the afternoon.
+
+"I will be ready to receive his Royal Highness. My household shall be
+instructed," I answered coldly, though I dread that old man.
+
+"You are not wanted," I told Frederick Augustus. "Better make yourself
+scarce." He didn't need to be told twice. "Undress-uniform," he shouted
+to his valet. "And send somebody for a cab."
+
+"Why a cab?" I inquired.
+
+He looked at me in a pitying way. "Women are such geese," he made
+answer. "Don't you see, if I left the palace in one of our own
+carriages, the King, or father, might notice and call me back."
+
+"Oh, very well. And don't 'celebrate' too much while you are out."
+
+I had the lackeys line the staircase and corridors. My military
+household stood in the first ante-chamber, my courtiers in the second,
+my ladies in the third when Prince George walked into my parlor. At
+first he acted in no unfriendly manner. He kissed me on the forehead and
+asked after the babies, and if he hadn't riveted his eyes all the time
+into some corner of the room--his stratagem when in an ugly mood--I
+might have persuaded myself that he wasn't on mischief bent.
+
+But he soon began pouring out his bile. With a face like a wooden martyr
+he announced that he was not pleased with me.
+
+"You are too much of a light-weight, too vivacious, too attractive to
+the mob," he said in his bitterest tones. "You are forever seeking the
+public eye like--an actress."
+
+"I beg your Royal Highness to take notice that Imperial Princesses of
+Austria"--I put some emphasis on the Imperial--"while popular, never
+descend to jugglery," I answered politely, but firmly.
+
+"No offence to your Imperial Highness," said George, "but you must
+understand once and for all that Saxon princes and princesses are bound
+by our house laws to the strictest observance of precedence. The love of
+the people naturally goes out to the King and Queen. Junior members of
+the Royal House must not seek to divert to themselves the popularity
+that is the King's own."
+
+"I have always been taught to respond to popular greetings offered me.
+My aunt, the Empress Elizabeth, in particular instructed me to that
+effect," I submitted with great deference.
+
+"Her Majesty didn't instruct you to make a show of yourself every hour
+of the day," hissed George, his eyes devouring the stove.
+
+"I drive out twice, in the morning to go shopping, in the afternoon to
+air my babies."
+
+George, unable to dispute me, abandoned pretensions of politeness or
+manners. He fairly roared at me: "You are travelling the streets all the
+time. It has to stop."
+
+Whereupon I said in as sharp a voice as I could manage: "And Your Royal
+Highness has to stop bellowing at me. I'm not used to it. In Salzburg
+and Vienna gentlemen don't use that tone of voice and that sort of
+language to gentlewomen."
+
+"Salzburg," cried George, "in Salzburg you got your ears boxed, but it
+didn't do much good to all appearances."
+
+"Your Royal Highness," I answered, "my mother has her faults, but it's
+no one's business outside of her immediate family. And no one at this
+court has a mother's authority over me."
+
+I saw that George was beside himself with rage. "If your husband," he
+snarled, "was as free with his hand as your mother, there would be an
+end to your frivolities."
+
+"Your Royal Highness forgets what you admitted yourself, namely, that
+the indignities offered me while I was a child were bereft of beneficial
+results. And please take notice," I added, raising my voice, "I won't
+stand violence from anyone, neither from my husband--as you kindly
+suggest--nor from you, or the King."
+
+George was too surprised to even attempt a reply. He evidently didn't
+know what to say or do. To avoid my eyes that were seeking his, he
+turned his back on me and stepped up to a little table laden with books.
+He studied the titles for a while, then, turning suddenly, held a small
+volume towards me. His arm was out-stretched as if he feared to
+contaminate his uniform.
+
+"What have we got here?" he cried.
+
+It was my turn to be astonished. "Why, according to the binding, it must
+be Heine's _Atta Troll_."
+
+"_Atta Troll_," cried George, and opening the book at random he read
+half to himself:
+
+    "This bear-leader six Madonnas
+    Wears upon his pointed hat,
+    To protect his head from bullets
+    Or from lice, perchance, it may be."
+
+He fired the volume on the floor and grabbed another. "What's this?"
+
+"As the title will indicate to your Royal Highness, Nietzsche's
+Zarathustra." For the life of me I couldn't see any harm in this portion
+of my library.
+
+George continued to rummage among the books. He acted like a madman.
+"What's this, what's this?" he kept on saying, turning them over and
+over. I thought it beneath my dignity to answer. I just stared at the
+fanatic.
+
+After he finished his hurried examination, he took one book after the
+other and tossed it violently at my feet.
+
+"Heine, the Jew-scribbler," he cried, aiming a kick at Atta Troll.
+
+"Don't you dare," I said, "that book was given me by Her Majesty, the
+Empress of Austria."
+
+"I can't believe it," shouted George, "that Jew-scribbler, the reviler
+of kinship."
+
+"He never lampooned the kings of Saxony," I calmly remarked, picking up
+the volume. "Here is Her Majesty's dedication to me."
+
+"Everybody knows the eccentricities of Her Majesty of Austria," shouted
+George. "Anyhow, who gave you permission to read such rotten stuff as
+this at our court?"
+
+"Prince George," I answered, taking two steps towards him, "Duke of
+Saxony, the Archduchess of Austria takes pleasure to inform you that in
+her house she asks no one's permission what to read or do."
+
+At this he turned drill-ground bully. "You are in the King's house,"
+rang out his voice in cutting tones, "and at this moment I represent the
+King. And in the King's name I forbid you to read these obscenities, and
+in the King's name I hereby command that these books be destroyed at
+once."
+
+Well, since he talked in the King's name I had no leg to stand on. I
+merely bowed acquiescence and he strutted out, turning his back on me as
+he went without salutation of any sort. I ran into my room, locked the
+door and had a good cry.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII
+
+I DEFY THEM
+
+    Laughter and pleasant faces for me--Frederick Augustus refuses to
+    back me, but I don't care--We quarrel about my reading--He professes
+    to gross ignorance.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _May 1, 1894_.
+
+What's the use keeping a diary that is nothing but a record of quarrels
+and humiliations? After I finished the entry about my scene with Prince
+George, I felt considerably relieved. I had held my own, anyhow. But
+fighting is one thing and writing another. I am always ready for a
+fight, but "war-reporting" comes less easy.
+
+The unpleasantness with George brought in its wake, as a natural
+consequence so to speak, a whole lot of other squabbles and
+altercations, family jars and general rumpuses, which I cared not to
+embalm in these pages at the time. However, as they are part and parcel
+of my narrative, incomplete as it may be, I will insert them by and by
+according to their sequence.
+
+After George was gone I made up my mind that, his commands and threats
+notwithstanding, I must continue to live as I always did: joyful, free
+within certain limits and careless of puritan standards. If the rest of
+the royal ladies, and the women of the service, want to mope and look
+sour, that's their affair. Let them wear out their lives between
+confessional, knitting socks for orphan children, _Kaffe-klatsches,_
+spying and tale-bearing and prayer-meetings,--it isn't my style. I'm
+young, I'm pretty, I'm full of red blood, life means something to me. I
+want to live it my own way.
+
+I want to laugh; I have opinions of my own; I want to read books that
+open and improve the mind. I want to promote my education by attending
+lectures, by going to the theatre--in short, I don't want to become a
+dunce and a bell-jingling fool like the others.
+
+If that spells royal disgrace--be it so. Louise won't purchase two "_How
+art thou's?_" at the price their Majesties and Royal Highnesses ask.
+
+Of course, it would come easier with Frederick Augustus's help and
+support, but since he chooses to be bully-ragged and sat upon and,
+moreover, finds pleasure in licking the hand that strikes at his and his
+wife's dignity, I will go it alone.
+
+I defy them.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 16, 1894_.
+
+I had another tiff with Frederick Augustus, but the cause is too
+insignificant to deserve record. I will rather tell about our grand
+quarrel following Prince George's visit. We dined alone that day, as he
+was eager to hear the news. The preliminaries didn't excite him much,
+but when I mentioned the book episode, he bristled up.
+
+"You won't allow the King, or Prince George, to dictate what I shall
+read or not read?" I demanded. "My house is my castle and I won't brook
+interference in my _menage_."
+
+"Do you really suppose," replied Frederick Augustus, "that I'll court
+royal displeasure for the sake of those Jew-scribblers? I never read a
+book since I left school and can't make out what interest books can have
+to you or anyone else. Where did you get them, anyhow?"
+
+I told him that Leopold supplied my book wants. "My brother is a very
+intelligent man," I said, "and the books he gives me are all classics in
+their way."
+
+"Go to with your book-talk!" he mocked in his most contemptuous voice.
+"I asked the director of the royal library and was told that each of the
+books, to which father objects, was written by a Jew. Let Jews read
+them. It isn't decent for a royal princess to do so."
+
+"My brother isn't a Jew."
+
+"But in utter disgrace in Vienna. No one at court speaks to him. He is
+head over heels in debt and the next we know he will be borrowing from
+us. As to those books, don't bring any more into the house. Royal
+princes and princesses have better things to do than waste time on
+Jew-scribblers."
+
+With that he violently pushed back his chair and left me, a very much
+enraged woman. He didn't give me the chance to have the last word.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIX
+
+ATTEMPTED VIOLENCE DEFEATED BY FIRMNESS
+
+    Frederick Augustus seeks to carry out his father's brutal
+    threats--Orders and threats before servants--I positively refuse to
+    be ordered about--Frederick Augustus plays Mrs. Lot--Enjoying myself
+    at the theatre.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 17, 1894_.
+
+The chance came later and with it the conviction that His Royal
+Highness, Prince George, didn't quite believe me when I told him that I
+wouldn't stand for violence, for tonight Frederick Augustus attempted
+something of the sort.
+
+I had ordered my carriage for seven o'clock to drive to the theatre, and
+had just finished dressing when he stormed into my boudoir and demanded
+to know if I had taken leave of my senses.
+
+"Not that I am aware of."
+
+"But I hear you intend to go to the theatre--a princess in disgrace
+going to the theatre!"
+
+"Aren't you coming along, Frederick Augustus?" I asked naively.
+
+"I have no desire to lose my regiment."
+
+"And I have no desire to sit at home and talk nothingnesses with the
+fools His Majesty appoints for my service."
+
+"Take a care," cried Frederick Augustus.
+
+"Don't be a noodle and a coward," I answered hotly.
+
+"Louise, remember that I am an army officer."
+
+"What has that to do with my going to the theatre?"
+
+"It's the height of audacity to defy the King."
+
+"It would be the depth of cowardice to stay at home."
+
+"Take back that word, or----"
+
+"I wish Your Royal Highness a very pleasant evening," I said, indulging
+in a low genuflexion.
+
+Frederick Augustus got blue with rage. I saw him clench his fists as I
+swept out of the room, making as much noise with my train as I could
+manage.
+
+"An out-rider," I commanded the Master of Horse who stood in the
+ante-chamber awaiting me.
+
+"At your Imperial Highness' commands," bowed the Baron with the most
+astonished face in the world. We use out-riders, that is grooms in
+livery, to ride ahead of the royal carriage, only on state occasions in
+Dresden. But, of course, my orders would be obeyed even if I had
+demanded twelve grooms to attend me.
+
+I was just going out, preceded by my Chamberlain and followed by my
+ladies, Baroness Tisch and _Fraeulein_ von Schoenberg; there were two
+lackeys at the door and in the corridor stood the groom-in-waiting,
+holding several lap-robes for me to decide which to take, when the
+Prince caught up with me.
+
+"I forbid you to go to the theatre," he bawled in the presence of my
+titled entourage and three servants.
+
+I realized at once that this was the supreme moment of my life at the
+court of Saxony. Either bend or break. If I allowed myself to be roared
+at and ordered about like a servant-wench--goodbye the Imperial
+Highness! Enter the Jenny-Sneak German housewife, greedy for her
+master's smile and willing to accept an occasional kick. The Prince had
+begun this family brawl in public. I would finish.
+
+"I won't take orders," I held forth. "No commands, understand, princely,
+royal or otherwise. And be advised, now and for all time, that I will
+answer any attempt to brutalize me by immediate departure, or by seeking
+refuge with the Austrian Ambassador."
+
+If Frederick Augustus had suddenly become Mrs. Lot he wouldn't have been
+more conspicuous for utter petrification and silence. He stared at me
+with wide-open, bleary eyes and if I had taken him by the neck and feet
+and dropped him out of the window, as his ancestor Augustus of the
+three-hundred and fifty-two took the "spook" sent into his bedroom by
+Joseph the First, he wouldn't have offered the ghost of resistance, I
+dare say.
+
+"Your arm, Mr. Chamberlain, since His Royal Highness doesn't wish to
+accompany us." And I swept out of the ante-chamber and through the
+corridor, triumphant.
+
+"Gipsy Baron" was the bill of the play. I knew only a few of its waltzes
+and I drank in the comedy and the pretty music like one desperately
+athirst. Kyril's girl, the Dolores, was very chic and looked ravishingly
+pretty, and brother-in-law Max isn't the dunce I took him for.
+
+His Theresa is a droll dog, fair to look upon, dark and fat. It will
+take a lot of holy water to save her from purgatory.
+
+Girardi made me screech with laughter. He is as funny as my
+father-in-law is mournful--a higher compliment to his art I cannot pay.
+Of course, actor-like, he appreciated an Imperial Highness' applause and
+looked up to my box every little while. I wish, though, he hadn't
+acknowledged my plaudits by bowing to me. It attracted general attention
+and soon the whole house was staring and smiling. The people seemed to
+be glad that their Crown Princess was enjoying herself.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XX
+
+TITLED SERVANTS LOW AND CUNNING
+
+    George tries to rob me of my confidante--Enter the King's spy,
+    Baroness Tisch in her true character--Punishment of one royal spy.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _August 1, 1894_.
+
+Prince George is planning a devilish revenge. He threatens to separate
+me from my Secretary and confidante, little Baranello, whom I brought
+with me from Salzburg. She is an Italian, and, unlike most of them, as
+faithful as a dog. A connection of the Ruffo family, princes and dukes
+that gave the world more than one pope, the small fry Saxon nobility
+hate her, and George knows that he can't corrupt Lucretia by his paltry
+presents and ridiculous condescension.
+
+They would send her back to Salzburg, if they dared,--anyhow, Baroness
+von Tisch is to be both Chief Mistress and confidential secretary. If
+she died of the first confidence I make her, she wouldn't live five
+minutes.
+
+The King's House Marshal, Baron von Carlowitz, came to announce the
+change to me, but I knew, of course, that it was George's doings.
+
+"Tell Prince George," I said icily, "that I appreciate the fact of being
+deprived of the services of an honest woman in favor of a spy."
+
+I will "show" this Tisch woman, as my American friends say. Some three
+years ago Emperor Francis Joseph appointed a spy as attendant to my
+brother Leopold. Schoenstein, Baron or Count, was his name, I think.
+Schoenstein would rather bear evil tales of his young master to his old
+master than eat, and nothing would please him better than to meddle with
+Leopold's correspondence.
+
+He stole as many letters as he could lay his hands on. Fished them even
+from slop-pails, or pieced together such as Leopold tore up and dropped
+in the cuspidors. When brother observed this, he used to tear up bills
+and the most innocent writings of his own and other people into little
+bits and planted them in Schoenstein's hunting-grounds. Appropriate work
+for a _lick-spittle_ to pull them out. But Leopold got tired of playing
+with this vermin, and it tickled him to make an example of the scamp.
+Hence, he allowed it to be observed by Schoenstein when he, Leopold,
+locked a parcel of letters from his girl in the cash-box.
+
+The toad-eating Schoenstein burned with desire to copy these letters and
+send the transcript on to Emperor Francis Joseph. They would have made
+interesting reading to my old uncle who has given up cracking nuts since
+his teeth fell out. There is Kati Schratt, you say. Pshaw, Kati is as
+old, or nearly as old, as his Majesty and she isn't a Ninon de l'Enclos
+by any means.
+
+To cut a long story short, Schoenstein could see but one way for getting
+those compromising letters: steal the keys and borrow the parcel for a
+short while. That's what Leopold was waiting for. Not half an hour after
+the keys had been abstracted, he raised the alarm. He had been "robbed."
+The archducal safe had been rifled. And he managed to catch Schoenstein
+red-handed.
+
+"Send for the police," thundered my brother, "and meanwhile watch the
+thief well." Schoenstein was given no chance to explain and deemed
+himself lucky to escape arrest. My brother suspended him from service
+and made him go to a hotel while he telegraphed the story of the
+attempted theft to Vienna, asking the Count's immediate dismissal.
+
+Of course, Vienna disavowed the dunderhead--royalty has no use for
+persons that allow themselves to be compromised--and he has been in
+disgrace ever since. Nor can he get another courtly office, for Leopold
+threatened the moment he sees him with a Highness to warn everybody:
+"Look to your watch and purse, we have a thief with us."
+
+I jotted this down to remind me that Prince George's spy deserves no
+better than the Emperor's.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXI
+
+BANISHMENT
+
+    I am ordered to repair to a country house with the hated spy as my
+    Grand Mistress--My first impulse to go home, but afraid parents
+    won't have me.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _August 10, 1894_.
+
+Order from the King that myself and children spend the rest of the
+summer at Villa Loschwitz, to remain until I get royal permission to
+return to Dresden,--the Tisch to act as chief of my household.
+
+Banished! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Smile, because I
+escaped the _ennui_ of attending court at the summer residence of
+Pillnitz; weep, because my absence from court would be interpreted as a
+disciplinary measure.
+
+I know Pillnitz is about as gay as a Trappist feast of carrion and ant's
+milk, but this princess doesn't want to be disciplined.
+
+I shall tell them that I want to go home, but will they have me in
+Salzburg? Papa, of course, but if mother hears of my acquaintance with
+Heine, "who doesn't love Jesus,"--her own words,--she will undoubtedly
+side with Prince George against her daughter. It was Heine who wrote of
+one of her ancestors, King Louis of Bavaria: "As soon as the monkeys and
+kangaroos are converted to Christianity, they'll make King Louis their
+guardian saint, in proof of their perfect sanity." And you don't suppose
+for a moment that mamma forgets a thing like that. As to Nietzsche, he
+will give her no conscientious qualms, for I'm sure she never heard of
+the gentleman, but my going to the Gipsy Baron "where two princely
+mistresses are gyrating"--horrible!
+
+I hear her say: "I think Prince George is most considerate sending our
+daughter to Loschwitz. She deserved to be put in a nunnery and made to
+kneel on unboiled peas three times a day." And when it comes to an
+_eclat_, even papa may have to abandon me. Emperor Francis Joseph holds
+the purse-strings; and papa always lives beyond his means and Francis
+Joseph, King Albert and Prince George are fast friends. If papa
+quarrelled with the two latter gentlemen, they would immediately
+denounce him to the Emperor. The rest can easily be guessed.
+
+Sorry, but papa is no hero in his daughter's eyes.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXII
+
+"POOR RELATIONS" IN ROYAL HOUSES
+
+    Myself and Frederick Augustus quarrel and pound table--The Countess
+    Cosel's golden vessel--Off to Brighton--Threat of a beating--I
+    provoke shadows of divorce--King threatens force--More defiance on
+    my part--I humble the King and am allowed to invite my brother
+    Leopold.
+
+
+    VILLA LOSCHWITZ, _September 1, 1894_.
+
+Father had to give in. He is the poor relation, and a poor relation in
+royal circles doesn't amount to more than one among well-to-do merchants
+and farmers. He has no rights that others need respect and if he shows
+backbone he is given to understand that the head of the family has other
+uses for the palace or hunting grounds lent him.
+
+"I would love to have you with me in Salzburg," he wrote, "but, dear
+child, it's for your best to learn to obey. Do it for your old father's
+sake."
+
+Still I wouldn't give in at once. "I won't go to Loschwitz," I declared.
+And gave a dozen reasons besides the paramount one that I wouldn't go,
+because Prince George wanted me.
+
+"I'm no trunk to be shipped hither and thither at someone's behest," I
+said.
+
+Frederick Augustus took umbrage at the "someone," which he pronounced
+_lese majeste_, and to emphasise the fact hit the table with a bang,
+whereupon I pounded the table twice: bang-bang!
+
+It hurt my hand, and didn't do Frederick Augustus any good. Nor was the
+discussion advanced thereby. For the rest: an exchange of names and
+epithets that smacked of the kitchen rather than the _salon_.
+
+"Too bad you exhaust all your energy with me," I said among other
+things, "while in the royal presence you act the docile lamb's tail."
+
+He began prating about his character as an army officer again, and I
+reminded him that I wasn't the Countess Cosel.
+
+"Who's that?" asked the big ignoramus.
+
+"Never heard of the lady that refused to accompany Augustus to the Camp
+of Muehlberg unless he brought her a certain intimate golden vessel
+costing five thousand _Thalers_?"
+
+"A loving cup?" asked my husband.
+
+"If you like to call it so."
+
+"But why did you say you are no Cosel?"
+
+"I meant to imply that I am not a prisoner of state and don't want to be
+treated like one. Hence, since a visit to my parents would greatly
+embarrass them, I decided to go to Brighton for the season."
+
+"Brighton," he repeated, "and where will you get the spondulicks?"
+
+"I saved up quite a bit of money. Guess I can manage the expense
+alright."
+
+"Lip-music," cried Frederick Augustus in his polite way. "You have no
+idea what such a trip costs."
+
+I assured him that I had made every inquiry and was able to meet all
+expenses. "We will go incog.," I added, "the babies and nurse and
+Lucretia. The Tisch woman shall have a furlough even before she asks for
+it."
+
+"Is that so?" Frederick Augustus laughed brutally. "You seem to forget
+that you are subject to our house laws."
+
+"And you seem to forget that I have a will of my own," I almost shouted.
+
+Frederick Augustus jumped up. "Not another word on the subject," he
+commanded. "The incident is closed."
+
+It suddenly occurred to me that Prince George had been talking once more
+to Frederick Augustus about the pugilistic performances of my mother.
+Perhaps he was trying to pluck up courage to beat me, a diversion not
+altogether unknown in the House of Saxony, according to the Memoirs of
+the famous Baron Schweinichen, Court Marshal and _Chroniqueur_.
+
+His diaries, covering a number of years, have many such entries as this:
+"His Royal Highness hit the Princess a good one on the 'snout' by way
+of silencing her tongue." Doubtless George would be delighted to have me
+"shut up" by some such process, but Frederick Augustus lacks the sand.
+
+When he was gone, I indicted a letter to the King, advising him in oily,
+malicious, yet eminently respectful language that, not wishing to figure
+as a prisoner of state, I had decided to spend the rest of the summer
+abroad with my children. At the same time I intimated that I was well
+aware of being in disgrace and being regarded with ill favor by the
+several members of the royal family.
+
+"If it pleases your Majesty," I added, "I will relieve a most unhappy
+situation by giving back his liberty to Frederick Augustus. I'll promise
+not to oppose divorce, or allow my family to interfere."
+
+This letter I sent to the King, sealing it with my personal arms, of
+which there is no duplicate at court. After that I sent three telegrams.
+One to papa, announcing that I was going to Brighton; another to the
+Palace Hotel in Brighton; a third to the Minister of Railways,
+commanding that my saloon carriage be coupled to the Continental express
+night after next. I knew, of course, that the King would be informed of
+these messages in a twinkling.
+
+I waited an hour for the Powers to move; as a rule it takes them a week
+or ten days. Exactly sixty-five minutes after sending my letter to the
+King, Frederick Augustus rode into the courtyard like a madman. He had
+been hurriedly summoned from the drill-grounds, I heard afterwards. He
+dismounted at the stairs leading to the King's apartments. Half an hour
+later, he slunk into my room, as serious as a corpse. There wasn't a
+trace of brutality in his voice as he said:
+
+"A fine row you kicked up."
+
+I didn't favor him by questions, but kept looking out of the window. He
+walked up and down for five or six minutes, boring his eyes into the
+corners of the room. Suddenly, at a safe distance, he delivered himself
+of the following:
+
+"His Majesty interdicts your plans _in toto_. You will be conducted to
+Loschwitz tonight. Don't put yourself to the humiliation of trying to
+disobey. You are being watched."
+
+"His Majesty's own words?"
+
+"He refused to see me," answered Frederick Augustus, dejectedly. He
+acted as if pronouncing his own death warrant. "Baumann told me." (This
+is the King's Secretary.)
+
+I almost pitied the poor fellow, but I had to hold my own.
+
+"My dear Frederick Augustus," I said, "you can tell Baumann from me that
+I won't go to Loschwitz tonight; that for the present I intend to stay
+here and that, if they force me, they'll need plenty of rope, for I
+will holler and kick and do all I can to attract attention."
+
+Maybe Frederick Augustus wanted to say something in reply, but open his
+mouth was all he could manage. Seeing him so bamboozled, I continued:
+"It is decided, then, that I stay, but I give you fair warning that I
+will skip to England sooner or later. I don't want you to get into
+trouble, Frederick Augustus, therefore inform Baumann without delay."
+
+Frederick Augustus got blue in the face. He seemed ready to jump on me,
+crush me between his cuirassier fists. I held up my hand.
+
+"Did Baumann tell you that I offered to accept divorce if it pleases the
+King?"
+
+Frederick Augustus changed color. White as a ghost, he fixed his eyes
+upon mine, momentarily, and murmured: "Have we got to that point?"
+
+He ran out of the room and a minute later was tearing up the stairs
+leading to the King's apartments. Lucretia says he returned within a
+quarter of an hour and tried my door. But I had locked myself in and
+refused to open. We didn't meet until dinner. Neither of us ate a bite,
+or said a word. Baumann was announced with the ice. He was all smiles,
+all devotion.
+
+"His Majesty will be pleased to see your Imperial Highness in a quarter
+of an hour," he said sweetly.
+
+Frederick Augustus was a painted sepulchre when I coolly replied: "Pray
+inform His Majesty that I am not well and about to retire for the
+night."
+
+At this Baumann looked like a whipped dog. He probably thought it
+impossible for anyone to refuse to answer the summons of His Majesty.
+With the most downcast mien in the world, he seemed singularly anxious
+to render himself ridiculous. "Maybe the Crown Prince will do in my
+stead," I suggested maliciously.
+
+Baumann grabbed at the straw and withdrew. A little while later a lackey
+came, summoning Frederick Augustus to Prince George. When he came back,
+he was all undone.
+
+"Father treated me very well," he said. "He says the King regrets that
+your uncontrollable temper causes so many misunderstandings, and both
+His Majesty and father have no objection to your staying in Dresden if
+you like. Loschwitz was suggested because you and the children seem to
+need country air.
+
+"As to your proposed visit to England, the King begs you to consider
+that such a journey at this time is liable to provoke a scandal which
+would reflect not only on you, on us, but on your poor parents."
+
+The old story of the penurious relations, I thought bitterly, but on the
+whole I was well pleased. I had beaten and out-generaled them all.
+
+"If Loschwitz isn't meant for punishment, I accept with pleasure," I
+said. "It's a very pretty place." Poor Frederick Augustus' face lit up.
+"But there must be an end to the talk about I being in disgrace. If the
+King is as friendly to me as he makes out, let him come and see me and
+the babies. As to summonses by Baumann or others, I won't accept them."
+
+"Very well," said Frederick Augustus, and I saw that I had risen
+mile-high in his estimation, "when will it be your pleasure to leave for
+Loschwitz?"
+
+"Tonight, if I have permission to invite Leopold for a week or so."
+
+"Are you stark, staring mad?" shouted my husband,--"Impose conditions
+after the King moderated?"
+
+"Go and tell Baumann I'll have Leopold or all is off," I said.
+
+Next morning: Ceremonial visit from the Queen. The tip of her nose was
+redder than ever and she seemed prepared to weep at the flicking of an
+eye-lash. She gave me a list of her troubles, mental, physical,
+political, matrimonial and otherwise, since the day she was born, but
+said: "Obedience to my father, the King, and obedience to my husband,
+the King, has enabled me to weather all storms. You, too, must learn
+obedience, Louise. It's women's only salvation and especially a
+princess's."
+
+I answered that I fully recognized my obligations to the King. "I only
+object to being buffeted around like a piece of furniture."
+
+"I know, I know," said the Queen, "and hope all is arranged
+satisfactorily. The King will be glad if you invite your parents to
+Loschwitz."
+
+"I asked permission to invite Leopold."
+
+"But, no doubt, your parents would take more interest in the children
+than your brother."
+
+"I don't dispute that, Your Majesty. But if my parents joined me at the
+present time, people might think they came to condole with me or else to
+scold me. I want Leopold."
+
+The Queen said she wouldn't dare mention Leopold to His Majesty.
+
+"Well, then," I concluded, "I shall stay in Dresden, regarding Baumann's
+fine promises as mere talk."
+
+The Queen went away with the air of a martyr, but three days later
+Baumann came and said His Imperial Highness was welcome.
+
+A triumph all along the line. I left Dresden without seeing the King.
+
+Frederick Augustus is at the manoeuvres.
+
+The Baroness is acting as my Grand Mistress.
+
+I expect Leopold in a fortnight.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIII
+
+A SERVANT-TYRANT
+
+    My correspondence is not safe from the malicious woman appointed
+    Grand Mistress--Lovers at a distance and by correspondence--Fell in
+    love with a leg.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _September 8, 1894_.
+
+Baroness Tisch, now that she attained the height of her ambition, is
+beginning to show her claws. She is an infernal cat. Her skinniness
+makes her repulsive to me and her face gives everyone the impression
+that she just sucked an enormous lemon. She lisps and that makes me
+nervous. I feel like aping her when she isn't around.
+
+She's after me like the devil chasing a poor soul and as I never address
+her except to command or reprimand, she tries to find out any secret
+doings, or thinkings, I may be guilty of by way of letters I write or
+receive.
+
+According to the laws of most countries private correspondence is
+sacred, legally and morally. The late Field-Marshal, Count Blumenthal,
+wrote to his wife of the Crown Prince, afterwards Emperor Frederick,
+that he was a "d----fool," but "as communications between husband and
+wife are privileged," no official cognizance was taken.
+
+Otherwise in this petty kingdom and, as already told, in Austria, whose
+monarch, in family matters at least, holds to the "_L'Etat c'est moi_"
+maxim.
+
+The King's spy, the Tisch, constituted herself post-office of Villa
+Loschwitz--a duty appertaining to her rank--and I wager she works the
+"_Black Cabinet_" to perfection. Of course, I am now careful in all I
+write and advise my friends to be, but I sometimes get letters from
+Unknowns, people that sympathize with me or have fallen in love with me.
+All women in high station have lovers among the lowly. I recall the
+Cardinal Dubois' yarn about Salvatico, envoy of the Prince of Modena, my
+kinsman of yore. The Italian was sent to Paris to conduct home his
+master's lovely intended, _Mademoiselle_ de Valois, daughter of the
+Regent. It happened that the emissary was introduced to _Mademoiselle's_
+room an hour before the time set, when she was lying on a lounge "with
+one leg, almost naked, hanging down." Salvatico fell in love with the
+leg and exhausted himself in so many "Ah, ah's" of admiration and other
+love-sick stunts that the Duke of Richelieu, having older rights, said
+to him: "Rogue, if you had your deserts I would cut off your two ears!"
+
+No man, except my husband, has seen my legs, which is a pity, perhaps,
+but the extreme _decollete_ demanded at certain court functions,
+especially in Berlin, gained me many epistolary lovers, whose homage I
+accept gracefully, but in silence, of course.
+
+Still, a malicious thing like the Tisch, if one gives her enough rope,
+might arrange, on paper at least, to get me with child by a Lothario a
+hundred miles off, even as the children of Madame de Montespan and Louis
+XIV were credited to the Marquis, her husband, residing a hundred
+leagues away, at Guienne. Let me find her red-handed and she will fare
+even worse than Schoenstein.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIV
+
+MORE TYRANNY OF A TITLED SERVANT
+
+    My daily papers seized, and only milk-and-water clippings are
+    submitted--"King's orders"--Grand Mistress's veracity doubted--My
+    threats of suspension cow her.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _September 10, 1894_.
+
+This morning there were no newspapers at the usual hour. Instead, the
+Tisch furnished a heap of clippings carefully pasted up--the veriest
+milk-and-water slush "ever." Instanter I sent for my tormentor.
+
+"What's this?" I demanded.
+
+"Today's papers, Your Imperial Highness."
+
+"You made these clippings?"
+
+"At Your Imperial Highness's commands."
+
+"And you think me ninny enough to be satisfied with reading no more than
+what you consider proper for me to see?"
+
+The Tisch wavered not a bit. "His Majesty the King is served the same
+fashion."
+
+"No matter. I want my papers whole, and don't you dare to mutilate
+them." By way of letting her down easier I added: "Don't give yourself
+the trouble."
+
+"No trouble, I assure your Imperial Highness. With your permission,
+then, I will continue to clip for Your Imperial Highness."
+
+I rose and, measuring her from head to toe with flaming eyes, I said:
+"You will do nothing of the kind, do you understand?"
+
+The impertinent cat insisted: "But I think it proper----"
+
+"Have you heard what I said or not, Baroness?"
+
+She tried to save her face by asserting, "I am acting by command of His
+Majesty."
+
+"I will ask His Majesty whether you spoke the truth," I said quick as a
+flash; "meanwhile you are suspended and will return to Dresden until
+recalled. Ring the bell and I will give orders to the Master of Horse to
+send you away."
+
+Of course Tisch couldn't afford such an inquiry to be made, which would
+have exposed her clumsy hand and, as remarked, royalty doesn't care to
+be found out. Defeat staring her in the face, Tisch wavered: "Of course,
+if your Imperial Highness chooses to take the responsibility, I will be
+most happy to submit the papers as they arrive."
+
+"In their wrappers," I commanded, as I dismissed her.
+
+By distributing a hundred marks in silver, I found out that the Tisch
+examines my body-servants daily and that, night after night, she sits
+up hours writing long-winded reports. She is the King's tool, but she
+let the cat out of the bag when cornered. That gives me the whip hand
+for the time being.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXV
+
+THE TWO BLACK SHEEP OF THE FAMILY UNITED
+
+    Leopold upon my troubles and his own--Imperial Hapsburgs that,
+    though Catholics, got divorces or married divorced women--Books that
+    are full of guilty knowledge, according to royalty--A mud-hole
+    lodging for one Imperial Highness--Leopold's girl--What I think of
+    army officers' wives--Their anonymous letters--Leopold's money
+    troubles--We will fool our enemies by feigning obedience.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _September 15, 1894_.
+
+Leopold is with me, the brother two years older than I. They just made
+him a Major--a twelve-month later than his patent calls for.
+
+Like myself, he is almost permanently in disgrace with the head of the
+family, even as I am with the King and Prince George. We had no sooner
+embraced and kissed, than I asked him for the latest gossip concerning
+the Crown Princess of Saxony.
+
+"You are a tough one," he said, shaking his finger with amused mockery.
+According to Vienna court gossip, "I threw Prince George out of doors,"
+when he "raised his hand against me," Frederick Augustus and myself
+haven't been on speaking terms for six months; and the Saxe family was
+actually considering the advisability of divorce.
+
+Of course I told Leopold how things really are.
+
+"Then there will be no divorce?" he asked.
+
+"If the King and Prince George leave me alone,--no."
+
+"Too bad," he said with a laugh, "that knocks me out of the pleasure of
+maintaining my _thesis_ that the founder of the Christian religion
+didn't believe in indissoluble marriage, but, on the contrary, in
+divorce if such couldn't be avoided."
+
+"Who told you that?"
+
+"Professor Wahrmund is preparing a paper on the subject," said Leopold,
+who, as remarked, is a very well-read chap and a student. He named five
+or six emperors and kings, Catholics, some of them members of the
+Austrian Imperial family, who obtained divorces, or married divorced
+women. I jotted down the list.
+
+Lothair II divorced his wife Theutberga and married his love, Waldrade.
+
+Emperor Frederick I divorced the Empress Anna on the plea that she was
+sterile. She married a Count, with whom she had a dozen children.
+
+Margaret, a daughter of Leopold VI of Austria, was divorced by King
+Ottokar of Bohemia.
+
+John Henry, Prince of Bohemia, divorced his wife Margareta, who
+afterwards married an ancestor of the Kaiser, Ludwig of Brandenburg.
+
+King Ladislaus of Sicily divorced Queen Constance and forced his vassal,
+Andrea di Capua, to marry her against his will. Ten years later
+Ladislaus married Maria de Lusignan.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+But a little knowledge is a terrible thing, if it happens to be acquired
+by a prince. Princes are supposed to know nothing but the art and the
+_finesses_ of destruction--war. Upbuilding is not in their line.
+
+"I hear you are exercising a bad influence on Louise," roared our uncle,
+the Emperor, at Leopold when the latter took leave from him. "You
+furnished to her those infernal books, sowing the seed of guilty
+knowledge?"
+
+Leopold so far forgot himself as to address a question to the
+"All-Highest": "What infernal books?"
+
+"Books full of indecencies and obscenities, in short pornographic
+literature," shouted the head of the family, turned his horse and rode
+away in high dudgeon. Royal arguments are nothing if not one-sided!
+
+Then Leopold told of himself. His garrison: a filthy mud-hole in Poland.
+One-story houses and everybody peeping into everybody else's windows.
+The few notables of the town and neighborhood tickled to death because
+they have an Imperial Highness with them, and the fool of an Imperial
+Highness goes and "besots himself with a mere country lass." He showed
+me her photograph. I like her looks. A pretty face, blonde hair and soft
+eyes. He was her first lover. On his account she left her family. She
+dotes on him as a dog dotes on his master.
+
+Leopold is eccentric enough to jeopardize his career for this poor
+thing. He rented a small house for her and spends much of his time there
+when not on the drill-grounds.
+
+Hence intense indignation among the "respectable ladies." An Imperial
+Highness within reach and he "doesn't come to our dances, he doesn't
+visit and sends his regrets when invited!"
+
+Poor Marja suffers especially from the venom of the officers'
+wives,--cattle I detest. No royal or imperial prince is safe from them
+except in his mother's womb.
+
+"From morn till night and half the night they do nothing but gossip
+about me and my girl," said Leopold,--"If the cats were only satisfied
+with that! But every little while I get an anonymous letter from one of
+them, denouncing her; Marja is favored in a similar way; so is my
+general and our uncle, the Emperor."
+
+And needless to say Leopold can't get along on his salary and appanage.
+Father can't give him much. The Emperor won't, because the clergy
+intrigues against him as a free-thinker and non-church-goer.
+
+We thought long and deep whether it wouldn't be possible to improve our
+position and we decided on this:
+
+We will keep up each other's spirits by clandestine correspondence,
+carried on with the aid of a mutual friend. At the same time we will,
+apparently, fall in with the ideas of "our masters" and endure a few
+pin-pricks rather than waste our strength in useless opposition.
+
+Let no one chide us for hypocrites, because our gentleness will be a
+mask, our submission a snare, our obedience a lie. It's all on the
+outside. Inwardly Leopold and Louise will remain true to themselves.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVI
+
+FREDERICK AUGUSTUS CONTINUES VERY RAW
+
+    Manners _a la_ barracks natural to royal princes--Names I am
+    called--My ladies scandalized--Leopold turned over a new leaf,
+    according to agreement, and is well treated--The King grateful to me
+    for having "influenced Leopold to be good."
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _October 1, 1894_.
+
+I have tried it a fortnight during Frederick Augustus' sojourn here,
+and, like the French Countess who fell in love with the strong man of
+the circus, I am disappointed. Frederick Augustus considers my
+tractability _carte blanche_ to carry into the boudoir of an Imperial
+Princess the license of the brothel. He treats me like a kept-woman--all
+with the utmost good-nature. I am called names such as the other
+Augustus bestowed on the mothers of his three hundred and fifty-two, and
+I daren't remind him that some day I'll be Queen of these realms.
+
+This prince, like the majority of them, hasn't the ghost of an idea of a
+sensitive woman's nature. He paws me over like a prize cow, and as the
+fourteenth Louis esteemed his mistress's chamber-women no more worthy of
+notice than her lap-dogs, so Frederick Augustus makes love _a la_
+barracks before the Schoenberg, Countess von Minckwitz, or whatever
+other lady is in attendance.
+
+Only when he does it before the Tisch I am inclined to be amused rather
+than incensed. Tisch, cadaverous beanpole, never felt a loving touch on
+her shoulder. The place where her bosom should be never experienced a
+friendly squeeze. No one ever cared whether she wore silk stockings or
+rubber boots--be amorous, Frederick Augustus, when the Tisch is 'round!
+Indulge your coarseness! Put twenty-mark pieces in my stockings for a
+kiss. Tell gay stories and don't forget playing with my corsage. It will
+make the old woman mad. It will remind her of what she missed--of what
+she will miss all her life!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _October 10, 1894_.
+
+Letter from Leopold. He is going to church and--they leave his mistress
+in peace.
+
+He is paying banal compliments to the noble-women of his garrison and
+pinches the officers' wives when he finds one in a corner--and they seem
+to live in corners when His Imperial Highness is around--hence, no more
+anonymous letters!
+
+The spy planted in his household by the Emperor is allowed to see much
+of the "innocent" correspondence passing between me and Leopold. He has
+reported to Francis Joseph that the Prince turned over a new leaf.
+
+Result: Leopold's debts have been paid and he got about two thousand
+marks over and above his wants.
+
+Further results: A gracious letter from the King's House Marshal, Baron
+Carlowitz, praising me for "the good influence I am exercising on
+Leopold."
+
+Truly the world wants to be deceived.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVII
+
+PRINCE MAX MAKES LOVE TO ME
+
+    Wants me to consult him on all spiritual matters--Warns me against
+    the Kaiser, the heretic bishop--Princes as ill-mannered as
+    Russian-Jew up-starts.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 15, 1894_.
+
+Prince Max called on me the day of my arrival and promised me an
+armchair in Paradise for "reforming" Leopold. "I understand that your
+family life is ideal now," he added. "What bliss!"
+
+"Oh, Louise," he continued, with the face of a donkey withdrawing his
+nozzle from a syrup barrel, "whenever doubtful of the right way, of the
+Lord's way, come to me."
+
+It would have been un-politic to repulse the grotesque ape, and I said:
+"I will. I will even give you the preference over the Kaiser, who asked
+me the same thing--as _summus episcopus_, of course."
+
+Max looked about the room. We were alone, yet he lowered his voice to a
+faint whisper. "William is a heretic. Don't trust him in religious
+matters," he breathed stealthily. And this devilish Max began to stroke
+my hands and admire a bracelet I wore above the elbow.
+
+The Kaiser wouldn't have gone much further under the circumstances.
+Maybe he would have kissed my arm, though, from wrist to pit.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Tonight family tea in the Queen's _salon_. The King an icicle, but
+polite as a French marquis. He gave me the three "_How art thou's_" in
+the space of five minutes, asked after the babies and promised to come
+and look them over.
+
+Frederick Augustus, half insane with delight, pinched my arm and
+squeezed my leg under the table. I felt like boxing his ears.
+
+My father-in-law had to behave in the presence of the King and said a
+few commonplaces to me.
+
+Johann George and Isabella talked automobiles, not to let us forget they
+are millionaires.
+
+"How much did you pay for my blue car?" asked Isabella.
+
+"Not much," replied Johann George; "sixty thousand francs, if I
+recollect rightly."
+
+"My allowance for a whole year." I smiled my sweetest, and the King
+looked disapprovingly at the braggarts.
+
+For ill manners recommend me to a Russian-Jew upstart or to a Royal
+Highness.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVIII
+
+THE SHAH OF PERSIA FALLS IN LOVE WITH ME
+
+    The "animal" and his show of diamonds and rubies--Overcome by love
+    he treats me like a lady of the harem--On the defensive--The King of
+    kings an ill-behaved brute--Eats like a pig and affronts
+    Queen---Wiped off greasy hands on my state robe--When ten thousand
+    gouged-out eyes carpeted his throne--Offers of jewels--"Does he take
+    me for a ballet girl?"--The Shah almost compromises me--King,
+    alarmed, abruptly ends dinner--I receive presents from him.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 20, 1894_.
+
+Lover No. two. Very much in earnest, like the first, but I--extremely
+distant this time, though I accepted some emeralds and sapphires as big
+as dove's eggs. The Shah of Persia is the happy-unhappy man.
+
+The King and all the Princes went to the railway station to receive him.
+The Queen and Princesses, our entourage behind us, assembled in the
+throne room to do honor to the "animal." To designate him otherwise
+would be callow flattery.
+
+But his diamonds and rubies fairly dazzled us. Nothing like it in
+Europe, and our gala uniforms, compared with his, like stage tiaras to
+the Russian Crown jewels!
+
+Though he had eyes for me only, I didn't like him a bit. He is a little
+fellow, unsecure on his pins. And like the Balkan princeling I met in
+Vienna, looks as though there was a strain of Jewish blood in his veins.
+
+Like a true Oriental potentate, he wasted not a minute's time on the
+Queen and my sisters-in-law, but began making love to me as soon as he
+entered. The King had to take him by the arm to remind him that his
+first greetings were due to her Majesty. Poor Carola! Her face looked
+like parchment, much interlined, and the point of her nose was as
+conspicuous as usual.
+
+There's nothing elegant about this "King of kings," and his French, like
+his manners, is atrocious. He addressed a few set phrases to the Queen,
+then attacked me--"attacked" is the right word. If I hadn't been on the
+defensive, I think he would have handled my charms as unceremoniously as
+Frederick Augustus when in his cups. As it was I escaped but by the
+length of an eye-lash.
+
+State dinner at five. I never saw such an ill-behaved brute, yet he
+intended to be most agreeable. We are very pious at this court, but on
+occasions like this even an old woman like the Queen is obliged to
+denude herself like a wet-nurse on duty.
+
+His Majesty had the Queen on one side; me on the left. The King of
+Saxony was opposite.
+
+After we sat down the Shah examined Queen Carola from the point of her
+chin to the edge of her desolate corsage and had the effrontery to
+express disapproval in all but words. Then he turned to me. His gaze
+became admiring. He was evidently delighted with his discoveries and,
+true despot that he is, turned his back on the Queen, while paying
+extravagant court to my charms.
+
+The King, the whole vast assembly, the surrounding splendor were lost on
+this mutton-eater of a barbarian. He saw only me, _m-e_, ME, and I'm
+sure would have consigned all the rest to some unspeakable Oriental
+death for five minutes' _tete-a-tete_ with Louise.
+
+"You are neglecting Her Majesty," I whispered to him over and over
+again. This seemed to enrage him, but at last he turned to the Queen,
+expecting her to begin a conversation with him. Of course, Her Majesty
+thought he would take the initiative, which led to mutual staring, the
+Shah's eyes growing wickeder every second. Then he began to devote
+himself to the food and, be sure, there was small pleasure in watching
+him. He fed more like a dog than a human being and actually had the
+effrontery to wipe his sauce-spattered hands in the lap of my state
+robe.
+
+Then, before his mouth was empty, he began talking again.
+
+"Which of the princes is your husband?"
+
+I singled out Frederick Augustus. "He isn't a beauty by any means," he
+said, after examining him like a horse for sale.
+
+The next second his eyes were wandering over my body; I felt as if I was
+being disrobed.
+
+"You will attend the opera?"
+
+"I'll have the honor."
+
+"I will send you a little present after dinner," he said. "If you wear
+it tonight, I will regard that as a sign of hope." The beast affected a
+sentimentality to which he must be a stranger.
+
+I recalled that he was the monster who carpeted the steps of his throne
+with the gouged-out eyes of ten thousand enemies of his regime when he
+was crowned. On twenty-thousand human eyes he trod with naked feet as he
+acclaimed himself "King of kings" and the "true son of God." And
+Juggernaut was in love with me!
+
+I was speechless. Did he take me for a dancing girl? I narrowed my
+shoulders and gave him a look of disdain. House Marshal Baron Carlowitz,
+standing behind the King's chair, took in the situation and whispered to
+King Albert.
+
+The King immediately rose from table and the state dinner came to an
+abrupt end.
+
+An hour later, while I was dressing for the theatre, a big jewel box was
+handed in. "From the Shah."
+
+Despite my disgust with the fellow, I opened it in feverish haste. There
+was a bracelet set with rubies, sapphires and emeralds of fabulous
+size.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIX
+
+THE SHAH COMPROMISES ME IN PUBLIC
+
+    Has only eyes for me at the grand manoeuvres, and I can't drive
+    him from my carriage--Ignores the King and the military
+    spectacle--Calls me his adored one--Court in despair--Shah ruins
+    priceless carpets to make himself a lamb stew.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _December 1, 1894_.
+
+I am in disgrace again and that uncouth animal, the Shah, is
+responsible.
+
+The dinner episode was bad enough, but he carried on worse at the grand
+parade next day.
+
+Six or eight regiments, Horse, Foot and Artillery, had been moved to do
+him honor, but he flatly refused to accept a mount for the occasion.
+Like the ladies of the royal family, he drove to the parade field in a
+coach and four, and no sooner did he clap eyes on me at the rendezvous
+in another vehicle than he left his and shambled over to me. He stood at
+the carriage door, chanting love and devotion, and if I hadn't been all
+ice, I have no doubt he would have jumped in and ordered the coachman to
+drive to a hotel.
+
+Meanwhile the King trotted around the manoeuvre field in honor of his
+"sublime guest." Evolutions, _Parade-marsch_, attacks, saluting the
+colors, Persian and Saxon, what not? Imagine the feelings of the old
+King when he rode up to the Shah's gala coach and found it empty.
+
+The marching past had begun, and still the "King of kings" turned his
+back on it all, while trying to persuade me to be Queen of his seraglio.
+
+Our courtiers, the princes, the Queen, the generals were in despair.
+They took counsel with each other, disputed, advised, got red in the
+face. The Shah's gentlemen alone kept cool. They probably argued: If our
+master prefers the company of a pretty woman to looking at ten thousand
+men, he shows his good taste.
+
+I tried to shake him off. He stood his ground and smiled.
+
+"The Grand March has begun, Your Majesty."
+
+"Bother the Grand March."
+
+The King began to bombard me with ungracious, glances, and of course
+everybody stared. Three times I asked the big booby to return to his
+carriage to oblige his host. "Not while I may look at you, adored one."
+
+His love-making became desperate. The Crown Princess of Saxony, the
+Imperial Highness of Austria, the "adored one" of this butcher, who was
+ruining twenty-five thousand marks' worth of carpets in his apartments
+at our palace by using them as a shambles to prepare his breakfast of
+lamb stew. It was contemptible,--nay, ridiculous. Surely there was
+nothing to do but laugh. And I laughed and laughed again.
+
+Only when the last battalion had marched by and the music ceased, the
+"King of kings" returned to his carriage and drove back to Dresden with
+the most bored looking visage of the world.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXX
+
+MY LIFE AT COURT BECOMES UNBEARABLE
+
+    Laughter a crime--Disappointed Queen lays down the law for my
+    behavior--Frederick Augustus sometimes fighting drunk--Draws sword
+    on me--Prince George would have me beaten--To bed with his boots on.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _January 5, 1895_.
+
+Ever since the Shah left I have been the object of criticism, suspicions
+and down-right attacks by the pretty family I married into. These pages
+witness that I tried to conform to the absurd notions and comply with
+the narrow-minded idiosyncrasies of the Royal Wettiners. I give it up.
+It can't be done, and I won't make another effort at pleasing my
+relatives-in-law, who adjudge laughter a crime and the desire to make
+friends a bid of lewdness.
+
+Prince George invented the phrase, "Louise is over-desirous to please,"
+and Queen Carola paid me a state visit to acquaint me with the new
+indictment.
+
+"Good gracious," I said to Her Majesty, "is that all? I thought of being
+accused of 'sassing' the Archangel Gabriel. As to desire to please,
+that's exactly what ails me. I love to please. I love to see people
+happy. I love to make friends."
+
+"My dear child," said the Queen, "you haven't the slightest notion of
+royal dignity. You talk like a _cocotte_. It's a Princess's place to be
+honored, to be held in supreme esteem."
+
+Poor old woman! She was never pretty, never was made love to, never had
+admirers, legitimate or otherwise; she thus became impregnated with the
+fixed idea that to be fair and to be loved for one's fairness is
+frivolous, if not altogether reprehensible.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _March 10, 1895._
+
+Frederick Augustus drinks. He says I drive him to drink by my attitude
+towards his beloved family. What the beloved family does to me doesn't
+count, of course.
+
+Drinking was one of the vices of his youth. Love for me cured him of the
+dreadful habit. As this love wanes, the itch for alcohol increases.
+
+I can't do anything with him when he is drunk, and at such times I am
+afraid of him. He both nauseates me and frightens me. Sometimes he comes
+home "fighting drunk." The fumes of wine, beer and _Schnapps_, mixed
+with tobacco, upset my stomach and I try to avoid his coarse embrace as
+any decent woman would.
+
+What does this royal drill-ground bully do? He unsheathes his sword and
+threatens to cut my liver out, unless I instantly doff my clothes and go
+to bed with him.
+
+Prince George's evil counsel wasn't powerful enough to procure me
+beatings, but my husband's military education, his love of discipline,
+backed by alcohol, thrusts a sword into his hand, and, if I refuse to
+comply with his atrocious demands, I am liable to be treated like so
+many "mere" civilians that are sabred in the public streets for refusing
+to do some spurred and epauletted blackguard's bidding, or entertain his
+insults.
+
+If the Socialists, who are forever railing against these self-same army
+poltroons, only knew it! An Imperial Highness threatened like a small
+"cit" with a four-foot sword in the hand of a drunken Royal Highness and
+dragged to a couch with no more ceremony than a street-walker passing a
+Cossack barracks!
+
+The howl that would go up in the Diet, or the _Reichstag_, the fulminant
+denials by prince and king and government! And if I really did get hurt
+in one of these fracases, Frederick Augustus would be sure of a "severe
+reprimand" by father and uncle, and perhaps by the Kaiser, too, but
+would that heal my wounds, would it save me from death? Would it even
+prevent Prince George from saying that I myself was to blame?
+
+No, no, I like a whole skin and prefer an embrace to a sword-thrust any
+day, like my ancestress, the Queen of Naples, who consummated the
+marriage forced upon her on the spot and in sight of the army rather
+than have her head cut off. Too bad she was hanged in the end despite
+her complacency.[5]
+
+Indeed, if Frederick Augustus shows the mailed fist, I don't stand on
+ceremony, but I do wish he would take his boots off.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 5: Joanna I, Queen of Naples, a pupil of Petrarca and in many
+respects an enlightened ruler. She issued the first laws and regulations
+regarding prostitutes. Hanged by order of King Louis of Hungary, after
+her defeat in battle, July, 1381.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXI
+
+PRISON FOR PRINCES THAT OPPOSE THE KING
+
+    Duke of Saxony banished--Cut off from good literature even--Anecdote
+    concerning the Grand Dauphin and his "kettledrums"--A royal prince's
+    garrison life--His association with lewd women.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _September 1, 1895_.
+
+I have once more come to the conclusion that the agreement I made with
+Leopold, to dissimulate my real feelings, was the sanest decision I ever
+formed, for, while _lettres de cachet_ are a dead measure as far as
+ordinary mortals go, kings still wield that awful and mysterious abuse
+of power in the family circle.
+
+There is a distant connection of our "sublime master," the King,
+lingering, without process of law, in a state prison. Duke of Saxony is
+his title, and he is quite rich in his own right. Some six or eight
+years ago he raised his hand against the King after the latter struck
+him.
+
+It was suggested that he had better make away with himself, and a
+revolver and poison were conspicuously displayed in the room where he
+was held captive.
+
+The Duke said "nay." He thought he could "brass" it out. But the
+assembled family council taught him that, while the world at large was
+_fin-de-siecle_, royalty still lived in the traditions of the eighteenth
+century. It empowered the King to banish his kinsman to a lonely country
+house, styled castle by courtesy, and he is confined there even today,
+with the proviso, though, that he may use the surrounding
+hunting-grounds. Otherwise he lives in complete seclusion, separated not
+only from all his friends, but from the very classes of society to which
+he belongs by birth and education. And he is still a young man.
+
+I believe they are trying to drive him mad, once as a punishment, and
+again to secure his fortune the quicker. To the latter end, he is denied
+all books that give him pleasure and are liable to improve his mind.
+Bibles, Christian Heralds, the Lives of the Martyrs, or the Popes,
+galore, but never a Carlyle, Shakespeare or Taine, which he demands
+regularly.
+
+The Duke is dying of _ennui_, they say, and to kill time engages in all
+sorts of manual labor. When he gets tired of that he blows the trombone.
+
+"Of course he would prefer a pair of kettledrums," said my cousin
+Bernhardt of Weimar, to whom I am indebted for the above.
+
+"Kettledrums?" I asked.
+
+"I mean those the Grand Dauphin, called 'Son of a king, father of a
+king, never a king,' was so fond of, and which he finally married in
+secret."
+
+I looked bewildered.
+
+"You are a very ignorant girl," said Bernhardt. "Never heard of the
+prodigious bosoms of _Mademoiselle_ Chouin?"
+
+"They won't let the Duke marry?" I queried.
+
+"Not even temporarily," said Bernhardt. "And they are trying the same
+game on me. My garrison--a dung-heap. The people there, males and
+females, entirely unacquainted with soap and water. Nothing in the world
+to do but drink and gamble."
+
+"That reminds me. What are you doing in Dresden?"
+
+"With Your Imperial Highness's permission, I came to see my girl."
+
+"Who is the lady?"
+
+"No lady at all. Just an ordinary servant-wench, but prettier and more
+devilish than a hundred of them."
+
+"Bernhardt!"
+
+"What would you have me do, Louise? I haven't money enough to keep a
+mistress, and King and Queen certainly won't keep one for me. I wish I
+had lived a hundred and fifty years ago, when every lady of the court
+was expected to entertain the royal princes, the Palace footing the
+bill."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXII
+
+PRINCE GEORGE SHOWN THE DOOR BY GRAND-DUCHESS MELITA
+
+    A royal lady who walks her garden attired in a single diaphanous
+    garment--Won't stand for any meddling--Called impertinent--My
+    virtuous indignation assumed--A flirtation at a distance--An
+    audacious lover--The Grand Mistress hoodwinked--Matrimonial horns
+    for Kaiser--The banished Duke dies--Princes scolded like
+    school-boys.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _February 5, 1896_.
+
+At last Prince George got his deserts, and got 'em good and heavy. There
+had been rumors for some time that Grand-duke Ernest Ludwig and his
+bride, Victoria Melita of Saxe-Coburg, the English branch, didn't get
+along together. Ernest Ludwig is a serious-minded, modest and
+intelligent man, but a good deal of a sissy. Victoria Melita is a
+spit-fire, very good-looking and anxious to let people know about it.
+She rides horseback and fences to show off her figure, and someone
+called her a Centaur.
+
+"Be in the palace gardens tomorrow at eleven," answered Melita, "and you
+will be convinced that I am not half-horse, even if my husband is a
+ninny."
+
+She kept the _rendezvous_, attired in a single garment of diaphanous
+texture.
+
+When Prince George heard that she had a lover, he went to Darmstadt to
+"correct her," as he expressed himself with much self-satisfaction.
+
+But Victoria Melita proved to him that English princesses are made of
+sterner stuff than the German variety.
+
+"I will have none of your meddling," said the bride of two years.
+
+"I came here to make peace between you people."
+
+"Play the dove to your daughter-in-law," quoth the Grand-duchess. "I
+hear you are fighting like Kilkenny cats."
+
+"You are impertinent, Madame," cried George furiously.
+
+"You will oblige me by showing this man the door," demanded Victoria
+Melita, addressing her husband.
+
+"Not until I have explained the situation," answered Ernest Ludwig
+quietly. "Listen, then, cousin! While I am by principle opposed to
+divorce, I won't force my wife to live with me."
+
+"And now be so kind as to withdraw," said Victoria Melita, opening the
+door for Prince George. Poor as I am, I would have given five thousand
+marks to have seen the meddling pest exit in that fashion, and I love
+Victoria Melita for the spirit she displayed, even if I don't approve of
+her _liaisons_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _February 10, 1896_.
+
+A mighty virtuous remark escaped me on the last page, and I almost feel
+like asking the Grand-duchess's pardon, for, whatever I am, I'm no
+hypocrite. Melita is said to have a lover; I have an admirer. Up to now
+I don't care a rap for him, but who knows?
+
+It's Count Bielsk of the Roumanian Embassy. I can't remember whether he
+was ever introduced to me. Most probably he was, but I forgot.
+
+An elegant fellow--always looks as if he stepped out of a tailor's shop
+in Piccadilly.
+
+Every single night I go to the theatre the Count occupies an orchestra
+chair that affords the best possible view of the royal box. It happened
+too often and too persistently to be accidental. Moreover, I observe
+that he pays no attention to the play. He has eyes for me only.
+
+Impertinence? Decidedly, but I can't be angry with the fellow. On the
+contrary, I am flattered, and the kind face and the fine eyes he's got!
+
+Poor stupid Tisch doesn't approve of the theatre, of course, and usually
+begs to be excused on the plea of religious duties. "What a sinner you
+must be," I sometimes say, "when you are obliged to forever bother God
+with prayers."
+
+The Schoenberg I send into the next box, for she is no spy and never
+watches me. But if I must take Tisch, I always command her to sit
+behind me. Etiquette forbids her the front of the box and from the rear
+she can see only the stage.
+
+What fun to carry on a flirtation right under the nose of that
+acrid-hearted, snivelling bigot, who would mortgage part of the eternal
+bliss she promises herself for a chance to catch me at it!
+
+Am I flirting, then?
+
+To spite the Tisch I would plant horns on the very Kaiser.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _April 1, 1896._
+
+The Duke of Saxony is dead--the man who at one time offered violence to
+His Majesty. Bernhardt was mistaken; he left a wife and three children.
+Of course, no recognized wife. Just the woman he married. Unless you are
+of the blood-royal, you won't see the difference, but that is no concern
+of mine.
+
+Novels and story books have a good deal to say on the subject of
+inheritance-fights among the lowly. Greed, hard-heartedness,
+close-fistedness, treachery, cheating all around! See what will happen
+to the Duke's widow and her little ones.
+
+According to the house laws, a regular pirate's code, his late
+Highness's fortune reverts to the family treasury. Prince Johann George
+will derive the revenues from the real estate the Duke owned privately.
+He is already rich,--sufficient reason for his wanting more. I shudder
+when I think what they will do to the woman the Duke married.
+
+The most notable thing about the funeral was the "calling down" Prince
+Bernhardt got.
+
+"You will go to my valet and ask him to lend you one of my helmets.
+Yours is not the regulation form, I see," said the King to him in the
+voice of a drill-sergeant. And Bernhardt had to take to his heels like a
+school-boy caught stealing apples.
+
+I had to laugh when I observed the meeting between my erstwhile admirer,
+the Prince of Bulgaria, and His Majesty.
+
+Ferdinand's broad chest was ablaze with orders and decorations, but his
+valet had forgotten to pin onto him the Cross of the _Rautenkrone_, the
+Royal Saxe House decoration. There were plenty of others, but the King
+had eyes only for the one not dangling from a green ribbon.
+Consequently, Ferdinand, though a sovereign Prince, got only one "_How
+art thou?_" If we were living in the eighteenth, instead of the
+nineteenth, century, his valet's neglect would constitute a prime cause
+for war between the two countries.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIII
+
+MELITA'S LOVE AFFAIRS AND MINE
+
+    The Grand Duchess tells me how she cudgeled George--Living
+    dictaphone employed--Shows him who is mistress of the house--Snaps
+    fingers in Prince George's face--Debate about titles--"A sexless
+    thing of a husband"--Conference between lover and husband--Grand
+    Duke doesn't object to his wife's lover, but lover objects to "his
+    paramour being married."
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 15, 1896_.
+
+Melita conducted herself at the funeral and in our palace as
+unconcernedly as if she and George were fast friends. She smiled every
+time she saw him, and he cut her dead to his heart's content. During the
+three days' stay of the Hesses, I had many a good talk and many a good
+laugh with Melita, and now I got a true and unabridged record of what
+happened at Darmstadt during George's meddling visit there.
+
+The Grand-duchess, who can be as catty as they make 'em, had her
+secretary sit behind a screen to take stenographic notes.
+
+Saxon kings and princes always roar and bellow when, in conversation or
+otherwise, things go against their "all-highest" grain. As soon as
+George felt that he was losing ground, he began to bark and yell,
+whereupon Melita interrupted him by saying, "I beg you to take notice
+that you are in _my_ house."
+
+George grew so red in the face, Melita hoped for an apoplectic fit. But
+after a few seconds he managed to blurt out: "It's your husband's
+house."
+
+"While I am Grand-duchess of Hesse it's my house, too. Moreover, this is
+my room and I forbid you to play the ruffian here."
+
+Prince George looked at the Grand-duke, but Ernest Ludwig said nothing.
+
+"I am here as the King's representative. I represent the chief of the
+Royal House of Saxony."
+
+"A fig for your Royal House of Saxony," said Melita, snapping her
+fingers in George's face. "Queen Victoria is my chief of family, and,
+that aside, Ludwig and I are sovereigns in Hesse and have no intention
+whatever to allow anyone----"
+
+"Anyone?" repeated George aghast. "You refer to me as anyone?"
+
+"In things matrimonial," said Melita, "only husband and wife count; all
+others are 'anyone.' You, too."
+
+"She calls me 'you,'" cried George, white with rage, looking helplessly
+at Ernest Ludwig. When the latter kept his tongue and temper, George
+addressed himself to Melita once more.
+
+"I want you to understand that my title is Royal Highness."
+
+"And I want you to understand that I am Her Royal Highness the
+Grand-duchess of Hesse, Royal Princess of Great Britain and Ireland,
+Duchess of Saxony," cried Melita, stamping her foot.
+
+With that she went to the door, opened it and said, "I request Your
+Royal Highness to leave my house this very second."
+
+And George went.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 1, 1896_.
+
+Poor virtuous me, to chide myself, and call myself names for flirting
+with Count Bielsk--at a distance of twenty feet or more! "I could kick
+my back," as the Duc de Richelieu--not the Cardinal, but the lover of
+the Regent's daughters and "every wife's husband"--used to say (only a
+bit more grossly) when I think what I miss in this dead-alive Dresden.
+
+Darmstadt isn't half as big a town, and the Hesse establishment doesn't
+compare with ours in magnitude, but what fun Melita is having!
+
+Of course, it isn't _all_ fun, for her husband is a "sexless" thing,
+and, like the Grand-duchess Serge of Russia, she would be a virgin,
+though married for years, if it wasn't for the other.
+
+"The other" is none other but Kyril, the lover of our Dolores,--Kyril
+isn't exactly pining away when separated from Melita.
+
+Well, Melita wants him all to herself. She wants a divorce. The
+complacent husband, who is no husband at all, doesn't suit her. Exit
+Ernest Ludwig--officially. Enter Kyril--legitimately.
+
+She made me reams of confidences, indulged in whole _brochures_ of
+dissertations on the question of sex. What an ignoramus I am! I didn't
+understand half she said and was ashamed to ask.
+
+Ernest Ludwig is the most accommodating of husbands. Knows all about
+Kyril and would gladly shut both eyes if they let him. Melita might, if
+pressed very hard, for adultery has no terrors for her, but Kyril
+affects the idealist. Sure sign that he really loves her. If he was
+mine, I would be afraid of this Kyril. No doubt he is jealous as a Turk.
+
+Last week the three of them had a conference. Lovely to see husband,
+wife and paramour "in peaceful meeting assembled" and talk over the
+situation as if it concerned the Royal stud or something of the sort.
+
+No recriminations, no threats, no heroics; only when Ernest Ludwig
+submitted that divorce be avoided to save his face as a sovereign, Kyril
+got a bit excited.
+
+"This is not a question of politics," he said, "or what the dear public
+thinks. Your wife don't want you; as a matter of fact, she isn't your
+wife, and since we are in love with each other, we ought to marry."
+
+"Marry, marry, why always marry?" demanded the Grand-duke. "I
+acknowledge that I haven't the right to interfere in my wife's
+pleasure--I am not built that way. Well, I _don't_ interfere. What more
+do you want? You don't deny that I am the chief person to be
+considered."
+
+"You?" mocked Kyril. "You with your sovereignty are not in it at all. If
+it wasn't for you, Melita and I could marry and say no more about it."
+
+"But I don't prevent your enjoyment of each other," pleaded the ruler of
+the Hessians.
+
+Now the idealistic Kyril got on his high horse. "Grand-duke," he said,
+"if you don't object to your wife having a lover, that's your business.
+For my part, I object to my paramour having a husband."
+
+And so on _ad infinitum_, and a goose like me abuses herself for a bit
+of goo-goo-eyeing.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIV
+
+MORE ABOUT THE SWEET ROYAL FAMILY LIFE
+
+    "Closed season" for petty meannesses--A prince who enjoys himself
+    like a pig--Why princes learn trades--A family dinner to the
+    accompaniment of threats and smashing of table--The Duke's widow and
+    children robbed of their inheritance by royal family--King
+    confiscates testament.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _September 13, 1896_.
+
+They are treating me like a laying hen. Expect another golden egg in
+December. Hence, "closed season" for imperious commands, "all-highest"
+orders and petty meannesses.
+
+When I learned that Bernhardt was in Dresden, I phoned him to come out
+and see me--without asking either royal, princely, or the Tisch's
+permission.
+
+A junior prince, without fortune or high protector, is really to be
+pitied. His title, the vague possibility that some day he may be called
+to the throne, stand between him and enjoyment of life as a man. Nothing
+left, but to enjoy himself like a pig.
+
+Bernhardt admits it. "They planted me in the God-forsakenest hole in the
+kingdom. If I saw a pretty woman in my garrison from one year's end to
+the other, I would die of joy. And the newspaper scribblers wonder why
+we are all Oscar Wildes.
+
+"Just to kill time, I am learning the carpenter's trade--this Royal
+Highness, you must know, lives in a carpenter's house, as innocent of
+sanitary arrangements as a Bushman's hut. Of course, I run away every
+little while to Dresden, incog. to pay my respects to Venus.
+
+"Louise," he cried with comic emphasis, "may the three hours you steal
+from my girl, by way of this visit, be deducted from your eternal
+beatitude."
+
+I lent the poor fellow five hundred marks and he rushed back to Dresden.
+
+Tonight I told Frederick Augustus of my interview with Bernhardt, not
+mentioning the five hundred, of course.
+
+He laughed. "He's no worse than the rest of us used to be," he said. "I
+did exactly like him, and father and uncle and brothers and cousins,
+ditto. Behold--your husband-locksmith! Max spent all his time reading
+the Lives of the Popes. That made him the dried-up mummy he is. But,
+believe me, I gave the girls many a treat. All the money I could beg,
+borrow or steal went for girls."
+
+Which explains Frederick Augustus's bedroom manners--sometime
+transplanted to the parlor.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _January 1, 1897_.
+
+I gave Saxony a third prince on December 9, and really I wasn't quite in
+condition to be scolded at today's family dinner. But since, with three
+boys growing up, the succession is more than guaranteed, the season for
+insults is again open.
+
+His Majesty, our most gracious, sublime, etc., sovereign, sulks.
+Consequently the family looks glum, down in the mouth, utterly unhappy.
+
+Max gets up to make a speech and one could fairly see the lies wriggle
+out of his mouth full of defective teeth: exemplary family life;
+traditional friendship of all members for each other; perfect unity; the
+King and all the princes brave as lions; the Queen and all the
+princesses paragons of virtue. And the fatherly love with which the King
+embraces us all; his more than royal generosity; his mildness, his
+Christian virtues!
+
+The Queen is a goose. Max's lying commonplaces make her forget her many
+years of misery spent at this court, and she grows as sentimental as a
+kitten. Fat Mathilda, Isabelle and Johann George applaud Max despite
+their better understanding, and now the King rises to make his usual New
+Year's address.
+
+The gist of his long-winded remarks is this: "I am the lord, your
+master, and I will see to it that you--wife, brother, nephews and
+nieces--will dance as I whistle.
+
+"For obedience to the King is the highest law," he paraphrases
+Wilhelm,--"strictest, unconditional obedience" (and he gave me a
+poisoned look) "and let no one forget it, no one." With that he beat the
+table with his clenched fist, and the whole assemblage turns an accusing
+eye on me.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 6, 1897_.
+
+They have driven the late Duke of Saxony's wife and children from house
+and home--put her on the high-road, piling her personal belongings,
+trunks, wardrobe and knick-knacks outside, too.
+
+She arrived in Dresden and sought refuge with her widowed mother. Her
+father, a Court-Councillor, dismissed because of the relations between
+the Duke and his daughter, died of grief and mortification, almost
+penniless. And the Ducal widow is as poor as the mother--and three
+children to bring up! Children of the royal blood of Saxony, children
+sanctioned by the Church of which they prate so much, for there is no
+doubt that the pair married in secret.
+
+The late Highness kept all his papers in a strong-box, and it's said the
+King's representative, who searched the safe by Royal orders, found
+neither acknowledgment of the marriage, nor a last will in favor of the
+widow and children. Hence, all the Duke's belongings revert to the
+royal family, and the estate he lived on goes to his next of kin, Johann
+George.
+
+Johann George, who has more money than he knows what to do with,
+promptly sent the bailiff after his cousin's wife and children.
+
+"_Noblesse oblige_,--the way you interpret the old saying, will advance
+the cause of monarchy immensely," I said to the official heir.
+
+"Is it any business of mine to support my relatives' mistresses?" I saw
+he was mad clean through.
+
+"You know very well that she was his wife."
+
+"There is apparently no official record of the marriage."
+
+"Maybe not in Dresden, as the nuptials were solemnized abroad. But what
+about the testament?"
+
+Johann George grew very red in the face. "If there is one, the King must
+have confiscated it. That often happens in royal houses."
+
+"And you mean to say that, with all your riches, you are heartless
+enough and contemptible enough----"
+
+"Take a care, Your Imperial Highness. The Duke's strumpet was today
+indicted for _lese majeste_ in connection with the testament matter."
+This junior prince dared to speak thus to me, the Crown Princess.
+
+"Johann George," I cried, "forget not that sooner or later I will be at
+the head of the royal family of Saxony. I forbid you to introduce your
+mess-room jargon into my parlor; at the same time I am sincerely sorry
+that a Prince of Saxony should stoop to buy cigarettes and gasoline with
+the pittance stolen from his cousin's widow and her three little
+children."
+
+I went to the door and told the lackey on duty to fetch his Royal
+Highness's carriage.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXV
+
+FLIRTATION DEVELOPS INTO LOVE
+
+    At the theatre--My adorer must have felt my presence--Forgot his
+    diplomacy--The mute salute--His good looks--His mouth a promise of a
+    thousand sweet kisses--Our love won't be any painted business.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 6, Night, 1897_.
+
+The talk with Johann George had excited me so, I wanted a diversion.
+Frederick Augustus sent word that he wouldn't be home for dinner. Hence,
+I decided to go to the theatre after an absence of months. It was after
+six when I telephoned that I would occupy my box at the Royal Opera. If
+I should see Him there, in the absence of announcements in the
+newspapers!
+
+He was there. In his usual seat. I won't rest until I find out how he
+manages to get wind of my theatrical ventures at such short notice. The
+Opera, Faust, had been in progress for ten minutes when I arrived. I
+espied him at once, but kept well behind the curtains of the box for a
+second or two. Then, suddenly, I dropped into the gilded armchair and
+the very same moment our eyes met.
+
+I am sure he expected me; he must have known I was near when I entered
+the house. To his ears the hundred and one melodies of Gounod's
+masterpiece were naught compared with the music of my silken skirts.
+
+He was so overcome, he forgot his diplomacy. Twice he pressed his right
+hand to his heart, then bowed his head in a mute salute.
+
+Fortunately the house was dark at the time and the audience,
+unacquainted with my visit, paid strict attention to the stage. No one
+but him saw my heart leap within me and the blood mount to my cheeks.
+Presently his diplomatic tact got the upper hand again, and he fixed his
+eyes on the score. That afforded me the chance to take a pictorial
+inventory of my lover-at-a-distance. I used my opera-glasses
+unmercifully.
+
+He's a fine looking man--if he were a woman he would be hailed a beauty.
+His forehead is a dream of loveliness; his mouth a promise of a thousand
+sweet kisses.
+
+If this man wants me, I mean if he wants me badly, our love won't be any
+painted business, I assure you.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 25, 1897_.
+
+Ball at the Roumanian Embassy. Royal command to attend.
+
+As if it needed a command to throw me into the arms of Bielsk.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVI
+
+COUNT BIELSK MAKES LOVE TO THE CROWN PRINCESS
+
+    Fearless to indiscretion--He "thou's" me--Puts all his chances on
+    one card--Proposes a rendezvous--Shall I go or shall I not
+    go?--Peril if I go and peril if I don't.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 26, 1897, Night_.
+
+We went to the ball as His Majesty's representatives, Frederick Augustus
+and I, and were obliged to say a few nothingnesses to a hundred paltry
+persons or more. When the Ambassador introduced Count Bielsk, I said in
+the most careless voice of the world, "I hear you love the theatre,
+Count."
+
+"I don't care a rap for the theatre," he replied. "I go to opera and
+operetta simply to see you, Imperial Highness."
+
+Such audacity! And he spoke quite loud.
+
+Frightened, I turned to the next person presented, saying something
+imbecile, no doubt.
+
+Later I withdrew upon the dais to watch the dancing, and at a moment
+when I was quite alone, he came up to me, making it appear as if I had
+commanded his attendance.
+
+"I have much to say to Your Imperial Highness."
+
+I didn't have my wits about me and didn't know how to act. He repeated
+twice or oftener: "Pray, Your Imperial Highness, I have something to say
+to you," until, at last, I threw etiquette to the winds and asked:
+
+"Why should you wish to talk to me in private, Count?" No royal woman
+indulging in lovers ever encouraged a rogue more carelessly.
+
+"Because my life and happiness depend on what I have to say to you."
+
+And, weaker still, I assented by the tone of my voice rather than words:
+"You make me curious, Count. Whatever you have to say, say it now."
+
+He raised his eyes to me, with a soul and reputation-destroying look.
+"Thanks!" Then wildly, clamorously: "Louise, I love you."
+
+Instinctively I thought of flight, but his eyes wouldn't let me rise.
+From that moment on he dropped my title.
+
+"Stay," he whispered, "I beseech you, stay. Don't you see that I love
+you to distraction? I have kept silent these many months. Now I must
+talk. I love thee, Louise."
+
+I tried in vain to collect my thoughts while his love talk fanned my
+blood. Finally I managed to say: "Can't you see that you are playing _va
+banque_?"
+
+"I know, but it doesn't interest me. Let my career be wrecked, I care
+not; I've got only one thought in the world--thee, only one wish--thee.
+And I must either love thee or die."
+
+I turned my eyes away and rose abruptly. As he bowed to kiss my hand, he
+whispered, still "_thou'ing_" me: "I expect you tomorrow at the end of
+the Grand Boulevard. Come when you please. I will wait all day."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+And here I am thinking, thinking, thinking.
+
+"The end of the Boulevard" is the beginning of Dresden's _Bois_. Does
+this madman really suppose that Her Imperial Highness, the Crown
+Princess of this kingdom, will lower herself and respond to his demand
+for a rendezvous?
+
+Yet, how he must love me to risk saying what he did say to me. He is no
+ill-balanced youth; he is a man of ripe judgment. His passion got the
+better of him.
+
+I adore passion.
+
+I must go no more to the theatre. Impossible for me to see him nightly.
+
+But it's a fine thing to be loved as I am. The most beautiful thing in
+the wide, wide world!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 27, 1897. In the Morning._
+
+He is waiting. Doubtless he expects me. What a persuasive thing love
+is, to be sure! Because he loves me, he argues that the Crown Princess,
+the wife and mother, will rush to meet him, fall into his arms.
+
+Of course, he will be most unhappy if I don't go, for I am sure he is
+not your ordinary "petticoat-chaser." He will suffer, he is suffering
+now while I sit here quietly.
+
+Am I quiet? If I weren't determined to stay at home, I would half-admit
+to myself that my soul is obsessed with longing for this man.
+
+A diplomat, who has seen much of court life, assumes that a woman in my
+position is at liberty to keep rendezvous! Let's reason it out.
+
+To begin with, Lucretia has to be won over. That's easy enough, but the
+coachman and lackey! They must be told that Her Imperial Highness is
+graciously pleased to _walk_ in the _Bois_, the carriage waiting at the
+end of the Grand Boulevard.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _After Luncheon._
+
+I ought to have said to him, I won't come. It's cruel to let him wait on
+a street corner and not even send notice, and to tip him off is
+impossible.
+
+And come to think of it, if Lucretia and I were promenading in the
+_Bois_ and met the Count by accident, where's the harm? And if I don't
+go--Good Lord, he might kill himself. He is desperate enough for that.
+And he might leave letters compromising me.
+
+I will go to give him a piece of my mind. I will be very harsh with him,
+very adamant.
+
+And I will try to find out how he manages to select always the same
+theatre as I.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVII
+
+RAPID LOVE MAKING IN THE BOIS
+
+    A discreet maid--"Remove thy glove"--Kisses of passion, pure kisses,
+    powerful kisses--I see my lover daily--Countess Baranello offers
+    "doves' nest"--Driving to rendezvous in state--"Naughty Louise," who
+    makes fun of George.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 1, 1897._
+
+A month of untold happiness. I went to the _Bois_ and I am going there
+every afternoon.
+
+He was splendid; he was modest, quiet. He seemed to exude happiness.
+
+Lucretia is discretion itself. She kept behind us, but out of ear-shot.
+
+"I came to tell you that you acted like a madman last night, and that
+the offense must not be repeated," I said sternly to Bielsk.
+
+"I _am_ a madman--in love," he replied, looking at me with big, soulful
+eyes.
+
+I chattered a lot of nonsense, prohibitions, commands, entreaties.
+
+"Remove thy glove," he begged.
+
+"You mustn't 'thou' me."
+
+"Remove thy glove," he repeated.
+
+Why I complied, I don't know, but I ripped off my glove, and he held my
+hand in both his hands and kissed it and kissed it.
+
+"What right have you got to treat me like a woman unmindful of her
+duties?"
+
+"I know that thou art lonesome, forlorn, Louise."
+
+He struck at my heart as he spoke these words, and my eyes filled with
+tears. He pressed his warm, pulsating lips on the palm of my hand,
+covering it from wrist to finger-tips with wild kisses.
+
+We were standing among the trees, and Lucretia, at a little distance,
+was plucking flowers. The remnant of common sense I mustered told me:
+"He is dishonoring you, repulse him," but his "I love thee, Louise,"
+rang like music in my ears. However, I tore myself free at last.
+"Farewell, we must never meet again."
+
+And then I lay in his arms, on his broad chest, and he covered my face
+with kisses, not passionate or insulting kisses. His lips touched
+lightly my eyes, my cheeks, my own lips--recompense for the long fast he
+had endured during all the months he had loved me at a distance.
+
+Marvelous kisses kissed this man, pure kisses, lovely kisses, powerful
+kisses. And I thought the whole world was falling to pieces around me
+and I didn't care as long as only he and I were living. He himself freed
+me.
+
+"Tomorrow," he whispered.
+
+I awoke confused, ashamed of my weakness, trembling.
+
+"I'll never see you again. Never," I said as if I meant it.
+
+"Tomorrow, love," he repeated. And I ran and joined Lucretia.
+
+When we were riding home I told Lucretia to draw the curtains, and fell
+upon her neck and told her all.
+
+The good soul was nearly frightened to death and we cried a good deal.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _January 5, 1898_.
+
+I neglected my diary, I neglect everything, for I'm in love. What care I
+for the King, Prince George and the rest who are trying to make life
+miserable for me? I laugh their pettinesses to scorn, for I have no
+other thought now but Romano Bielsk, no other interests. He is my all,
+my happiness.
+
+Of course, his "_Tomorrow, love_," prevailed and it has been "_Tomorrow,
+love_," ever since. On the day after our first meeting I actually
+thought I was warring against nature if I resisted his entreaties. It
+seemed to me that I had always known him, that we were predestined for
+each other. I still think so.
+
+Lucretia has a relative here, an aunt, member of the court set. Old
+Countess Baranello delights in intrigue and hates Prince George. When I
+told her of my affair, she placed her palace at our disposal, saying:
+
+"Bielsk shall have a key to the garden gate and to the pavilion inside
+the walls, which connects, through a subterranean passage, with my
+sun-parlor. You can meet your love there any time. I will see to it that
+none of the servants or workmen disturb you."
+
+A capital arrangement, worthy of an old lady who has seen many gallant
+days! There can be no possible objection to my visits at her palace, and
+the grounds to which Romano has the _entree_ fronts on a street
+unfrequented by society or carriages.
+
+I descend from my carriage at the palace gate; a knot of people, a small
+crowd, perhaps, collects to salute me and gape at the horses and livery.
+I sweep up the stoop, lined by my own, and the Countess's, servants. The
+bronze doors open. The Countess advances with stately curtsy; a few
+words _sub rosa_, and I--fly into the arms of love, while faithful
+Lucretia mounts guard at the street side, and Her Ladyship's spy glasses
+cover the garden;--needless precautions, but----
+
+It's rare fun, and, after all, where's the harm?
+
+I made good as propagatrix of the royal race, and a union of soul such
+as exists between me and Romano never entered into my relations with
+Frederick Augustus.
+
+Romano is very intelligent. I can learn from him; Frederick Augustus
+taught me only coarseness, and if it came high, _double entendres_. Yet
+my lover is only a Councillor of Legation! Because his superiors,
+fearing his adroitness, keep him down.
+
+My children! Have I ever been allowed to be a real mother to them? The
+King, the nation, owns my little ones. I see them at stated intervals
+for half an hour or so, and romp with them as I do with my dogs.
+
+Still, I don't altogether approve of Louise, malicious girl! When I am
+at the top-gallant of my happiness I sometimes say to myself: "Oh, if
+only George could see me now!"
+
+Naughty Louise--it's unworthy of thee. What do I care for George, what
+do I care for the world?
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVIII
+
+"IN LOVE THERE ARE NO PRINCESSES, ONLY WOMEN"
+
+    A diplomatic trick--Jealous of Romano's past--The pact for life and
+    the talisman--If there were a theatre fire the talisman would
+    discover our love to the King--Some ill-natured
+    reflections--Bernhardt's escapades cover up my tracks--The "black
+    sheep" jumps his horse over a coffin--King gives him a
+    beating--Bernhardt's mess-room lingo--Anecdotes of royal
+    voluptuaries--Forces animals to devour each other--Naked
+    ballet-girls as horses--Abnormals rule the world.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _May 20, 1898_.
+
+Romano learned about my theatre going by a diplomatic trick. He told one
+of the minor attaches of the Embassy that he had orders to watch
+me--"all-highest command." The official, consequently, negotiated with
+the box offices of all the theatres to phone him the moment Her Imperial
+Highness ordered seats.
+
+I am crazy to know how many women Romano loved in the twenty or more
+years since he grew to man's estate, and how many he seduced. It
+agitates and pains me to think of it, but all my questions are barren of
+results.
+
+Yesterday I asked him whether he ever knew a Princess of the Blood
+before me--"knew" in the biblical sense.
+
+"In love," he said, "there are no princesses, there are women only."
+
+He saw that I was hurt and added quickly: "Now don't be unreasonable,
+Louise--no prejudices. With the thought in my mind that you are an
+Imperial Highness, or that you consider yourself of better clay than I,
+I couldn't love you as I do."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 1, 1898_.
+
+We made a life-pact. Romano cut a gold piece in two and bored a hole in
+each half. He drew thin gold chains through the holes, gave me one of
+the amulets, and kept the other. Our combined monograms were already
+engraved on the bits of gold _en miniature_. Each swore to wear the
+talisman on the naked body for life, but we exchange amulets daily, or
+as often as we meet.
+
+When I am enthroned in the royal box and look down upon my lover below,
+I think all the time of this, our secret understanding, and it sometimes
+occurs to me, that the opera house might get on fire and both of us
+perish.
+
+Next day our bodies would be found. In or near the royal box, that of a
+woman, burned so as to be unrecognizable at first. ("We are all of the
+same clay," says Romano.)
+
+And down in the orchestra floor they would find Romano's body, likewise
+unrecognizable.
+
+And on my charred breast they would find the half of a twenty-mark
+piece. And on his charred chest they would find the half of a
+twenty-mark piece.
+
+And they would put the two together and discover that they match.
+
+Consternation, speculation!
+
+Someone suggests that the mysterious gold pieces be photographed for
+publication and the engraver who made the monogram, and the jeweler who
+sold the two chains come forward as witnesses.
+
+Meanwhile the identity of my body is established. That of Romano's
+follows. _Scandalum magnatum!_ But what are you going to do about it,
+_Messieurs_?
+
+If you had only known it a week ago! A prison _a la_ Princess Ahlden, or
+the Danish Queen Caroline Matilda, for me, disgraceful dismissal for
+Romano, for times are happily past when comely gentlemen, who have the
+wit to amuse royal ladies, durst be murdered in cold blood like
+Koenigsmarck, or be-handed, be-headed and cut into ninety-nine pieces as
+Struensee was in Copenhagen market-square.
+
+What are you going to do about it, King, George, Frederick Augustus?
+
+I'll tell you. You will bury me with the pomp of kings; and your
+sycophants will print beautiful stories about me, asserting that I died
+trying to rescue others, or did something of the sort; and your Court
+Chaplains will weep and pray and lie for me. And the tip of Queen
+Carola's nose will be redder than ever.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _September 1, 1898_.
+
+My young friend Bernhardt is doing me a great service and himself a lot
+of harm.
+
+A good-natured, tractable boy _au fond_, they made him a poltroon and
+worse by their persecutions, their meanness, their petty tyranny. He is
+proud, and they sent him to reside on a village manure heap; he is
+ambitious, and must drill raw recruits from morn till night; he is eager
+to learn and they try to embalm his intellect with tracts and kill his
+initiative by the endless, watery _ennui_ of tu-penny environment.
+
+Of course, he gets desperate and kicks over the traces, and while
+attracting the dear family's disapproving attention, I am more free than
+ever to devote myself to my Romano.
+
+Bernhardt's "latest" is really inexcusable. "I wonder we don't turn
+tigers with the education we receive," said one of the brothers of Louis
+XVI when upbraided for thoughtlessness and lack of consideration for the
+feelings of others--but Bernhardt seems to qualify for a vulture, and no
+original one at that, for a like offense as he is charged with was,
+several years ago, laid at the door of my cousin, Archduke Otho of
+Austria.
+
+Observe half a dozen young officers riding horseback in the neighborhood
+of their garrison town, Bernhardt at the head. At a bend in the road, a
+rural funeral _cortege_ hoves into sight: coffin borne on the shoulders
+of half a dozen peasants; weeping relatives; friends promising
+themselves a good time at the widow's expense on returning home. A black
+cross lifted high; priest and choir-boys in their robes.
+
+"Halt," thunders Bernhardt, blocking the way.
+
+The priest tries to expostulate with the half-drunken fellow.
+
+"Shut up, black-coat. I am His Royal Highness, Prince Bernhardt."
+
+Then--the devil must be riding him--he orders the coffin put down on the
+ground.
+
+"Out of the way, yokels."
+
+And he leaps his horse three or four times across the coffin.
+
+The outrage is duly reported in the newspapers and Bernhardt is summoned
+before the King. "Don't you dare to appear in uniform," Albert added in
+his own hand.
+
+"What has happened?" I asked the ne'er-do-well, when he begged for an
+audience after meeting the King.
+
+He pointed to a swollen cheek.
+
+"He hit me three times in _the eats_." (I beg the Diary's pardon for the
+language; I report literally.) "Three times," repeated Bernhardt,
+"that's the reason he wanted me to appear in mufti. As I went out one of
+the lackeys said: 'I never heard His Majesty rave so.'"
+
+"But why did you make a beast of yourself?" I asked.
+
+"To force the King to transfer me to another garrison, of course. I
+can't remain where I am, for the people are terribly incensed against
+me."
+
+"Did you tell His Majesty?"
+
+"Not on your life," answered Bernhardt. "If I did, I would have to stay
+there until my last tooth falls out. As things are, the Colonel will
+insist upon my speedy transference, and that's worth the three slams on
+the face I got in addition to the various _Lausbubs_."
+
+"He called you, an army officer, a '_Lausbub_.' Where is his vaunted
+respect for the uniform?"
+
+"Didn't he hit me in _the eats_?" lamented Bernhardt tragically in his
+terrible lingo. "I responded both to insult and injury by knocking my
+heels together and saying: 'At Your Majesty's commands.'"
+
+Of course, I told Romano. "Royalty," he said, "has only, on the face of
+it, advanced beyond the pirate and robber-baron period. _Au fond_ all
+princes and kings would be criminals if they happened not to be crowned
+heads."
+
+[Illustration: THE LATE KING ALBERT OF SAXONY
+
+Louise's Uncle by Marriage]
+
+He told me of a Balkan prince--young Alexander of Servia, the same mamma
+Natalie intended for my consort--whose chief amusement consists in
+having mice and rats chased by ferocious tom-cats in a big cage made for
+that purpose. Once, growing tired of that sport, he incarcerated ten
+tom-cats in the same cage without food many days in succession, visiting
+the prison hourly to see whether they wouldn't take to devouring each
+other.
+
+When, in the end, they did, tearing one another to pieces, His Majesty
+danced around the cage in high glee, pronouncing the battle of the poor
+beasts a bully spectacle.
+
+"You visited Castle Sibyllenort a week ago," continued Romano--"a most
+proper place, this royal residence, is it not? You ought to have seen it
+before your puritan King inherited it, ten years ago, upon the death of
+the last Duke of Brunswick. At that time it was a veritable museum of
+pornography, the apotheosis of Paphian voluptuousness. The palace, which
+has over four hundred rooms and halls--not one which a decent woman
+might enter without a blush--acquired its equipment as a _lupanar_ and
+its reputation for debauchery under the famous, or notorious, 'Diamond
+Duke,' a brother of the Highness who left the estate to King Albert.
+Both Dukes held high carnival in its gilded halls, but he of the
+diamonds rather outdid William in outraging decency.
+
+"One of his chief amusements was to hire a drove of ballet girls for
+parlor horses. He had a carriage constructed no bigger or heavier than
+a Japanese jinrickshaw, and to this hitched ten or twenty ballet girls
+in their birthday suits, walking on all fours, himself rider and driver.
+
+"Gracious--how he lashed his treble and quadruple teams of human flesh
+as they pulled him from room to room, and his was no make-belief
+ferocity, either. He was a niggardly rake, but in order to indulge his
+Sadist tendencies, agreed to pay one _Thaler_ (Seventy-five cents) for
+every drop of blood shed by the girls.
+
+"To make the count easier, white linen sheets were spread over the
+carpets, and the sum total was paid over to the two-legged horses after
+each entertainment, the girls showing the sorest stripes or wounds
+getting the larger share."
+
+Romano, who lived at half a dozen courts and is primed with the
+scandalous gossip of them all, could certainly write an entertaining
+book on the fallacies and vices of the world's Great.
+
+It's most indelicate, to be sure, but I laughed long and hard over the
+sexual specialty of my uncle, Archduke Karl Ludwig, who is bad, anyhow,
+as everybody knows.
+
+One morning His Highness rose at an unusually early hour, even before
+the scrub-women made their exit. In the corridors, in the parlors,
+everywhere blonde and dark percherons, cleaning away for dear life and
+courting housemaid's knee!
+
+Karl Ludwig has no more use for women than the late Chevalier de
+Lorraine, the President of the _Mignons_, but the exaggerated
+protuberances he met so unexpectedly on all sides, appealed to his sense
+of humor, or some other sense which I would hate to name. Anyhow, he ran
+into the garden and cut himself a switch. And ever since then his chief
+amusement is to switch scrubbing percherons. If he succeeds in dealing
+one a blow unforeseen by lying in wait for her, or coming upon her all
+of a sudden, he is particularly satisfied with his day's work and is
+liable to give a beggar a copper instead of the usual demi-copper.
+
+And of such abnormals the rulers of the world are recruited.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIX
+
+MY PUNISHMENT
+
+    I lose my lover--Quarrels with me because I did my duty as a
+    mother--Royalty extols me for the same reason--My pride of kingship
+    aroused by Socialist scribblers--Change my opinion as to Duke's
+    widow--Parents arrive--Father and his alleged astrolatry--His
+    finances disarranged by alimony payments--My uncle, the Emperor,
+    rebukes mother harshly for complaining of _roue_ father.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _Christmas, 1898_.
+
+God punished me for my sins. My children, one after the other, were ill
+with scarlet fever, and the youngest is only now out of danger. Of
+course, I abandoned all my frivolities. I can say without boasting that
+the mother atoned for the short-comings of the wife and princess.
+
+Hence I thought justified to arrange for a right royal Christmas
+present: Romano.
+
+Lucretia went to see him. He received her coldly, hardly vouchsafed a
+word. From a secret drawer of his desk he took a letter, ready written,
+dated and gave it to Lucretia. "It explains," he said curtly, as he
+opened the door for her.
+
+He has abandoned me. Because I loved my children better than him,
+because I am a mother first, Lais second, he throws away his Imperial
+_fille de joie_ like a lemon sucked dry and prates of tendernesses and
+heavenly fancies that he alone feels, that are outside the pale of my
+understanding.
+
+He even refuses to thank me, this proud wooer of the royal bed. He "has
+given me the best that is in man to give to a woman," etc., etc.
+
+Be it so! God desired to punish me and, because I loved much, he meted
+out to me mild chastisement.
+
+He stole my lover, but I have my children.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _January 15, 1899_.
+
+The King, Prince George, my brothers-in-law, my cousins and aunts are
+trying to make a hero of me. Because I followed the inclinations of my
+heart and helped to save my children, there's no end of their praise and
+admiration. Did they take me for a raven? I am disgusted with so much
+unctuousness.
+
+Nevertheless I changed my mind about the Duke's widow. When I felt
+friendly towards her and quarrelled with Johann George for taking her
+money and with the King for embezzling the testament and offering
+accommodation at the poor-house for his kin's children, I thought it a
+family affair, but now that the Socialist papers meddle with the case,
+which concerns the royal house and the royal house alone, it's time for
+the Crown Princess to stand by her colors.
+
+Those Jews have actually the audacity to reprimand the King and the
+royal princes, to impute ignoble motives to us all! They talk of us as
+if we were _Messieurs_ and _Mesdames_ Jones or Browns, trying to enrich
+ourselves at the expense of a corpse!
+
+They call us "inheritance-chasers," "purloiners of pupillary funds,"
+"starvers of innocent children."
+
+The Duke's kept-woman is "a lady of the highest character" and we are
+not; her children are of the blood royal--only better for the dash of
+plebeian.
+
+It makes me boil to read such things; to see the reverence due the
+throne set aside, the royal banner dragged into the mire, and of course
+it's the kept-woman to whom we are indebted for this pretty kettle of
+fish. It is she who set the press against us, and it's me, Louise, who
+protests with all her might that her demands and petitions be denied.
+
+Let her starve with her brats. If she was sent to the poor-house she
+might make anarchists out of loyal paupers.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _April 1, 1899_.
+
+My parents came to see the children and make merry because I am basking
+in the sun of royal grace. Mother has a new maid of honor, as ugly as
+the Tisch, and when we are _entre nous_ every second word is: "when
+Louise is Queen." They know to a penny what our inheritance from the
+King, the Queen and Prince George will amount to and are forever making
+plans and specifications how to spend the money for the glory of Saxony
+and of our own family.[6]
+
+Mother's scare-crow of a maid of honor had at least sense enough to tell
+Lucretia of a few scandals that happened at home, which mother never
+intended for my ears.
+
+It seems that papa, some few months ago, suddenly became possessed of
+the ambition to become an astronomer. Nothing would do, but he must buy
+a heap of instruments and set them up in a distant tower of Salzburg
+Castle. And there he spent all his evenings--star-gazing, he gave out.
+
+He seldom reached the nuptial couch before one or two in the
+morning,--utterly exhausted by the night's work.
+
+Well, mamma thought he labored too hard, and one forenoon when he had
+gone hunting, climbed up many stairs to investigate. Imagine her
+surprise when she found, in the astrolatry, a young lady in the act of
+getting out of bed, a girl, by the way, whom I used to know.
+
+Mamma had the _mauvais genre_ to report the case to Emperor Francis
+Joseph, while papa sought another climate, remaining away until mother
+begged him on her bended knees, so to speak, to come home. Nor did she
+get satisfaction from Vienna. That great moral teacher, the Emperor,
+told her not to make a scare-crow of herself, but on the contrary make
+herself pretty and agreeable for, and to, her lord and master. I
+understand now why mamma says: "All men stick together like gypsies."
+
+As a matter of fact father's limited resources are considerably affected
+by the various alimonies he has to pay to his own mistresses and those
+of my brothers. The third born of our boys, only a week ago, made too
+free with the _fiancee_ of the pastry-cook, who threatened to kill him.
+It cost father several thousand florins to appease the ruffian and
+Heinrich Ferdinand renewed acquaintance with mother's boxing
+proclivities.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 6: The fortune of the present King of Saxony (Louise's
+ex-husband) amounts to 25 million marks ($6,225,000)--no more than many
+an American parent paid for his daughter's seedy coronet. It will be
+remembered that Gladys Vanderbilt and Anna Gould brought to their
+husbands fifteen million dollars each, and the Castellanes and Szechenys
+are only nobles of the second class, their ancestors never having
+possessed ever so small a territory as sovereign lords. The bigger half
+of the Saxon King's fortune comes from the Brunswick inheritance already
+mentioned.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XL
+
+A PLEBEIAN LOVER
+
+    In need of a friend--My physician offers his friendship--I discover
+    that he loves me, but he will never confess--I give him
+    encouragement--We manage to persuade the King to further our
+    intrigue--Not a bit repentant of my peccadilloes--Very
+    submissive--Introduced to my lover's wife.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _in May, 1899_.
+
+Privy Councillor von Barthels, my body physician, is a very agreeable
+man. I have no use for his services, _professional_ services at present,
+yet insist upon receiving him daily. Still I love him not. Only esteem
+him as a friend, I need a friend. Physicians can keep secrets, and I
+have many of them. I look upon Barthels as my Father-confessor.
+
+The tears came into his eyes when I told him, and he said: "Imperial
+Highness, this is the most beautiful hour of my life."
+
+He spoke with enthusiasm; there was fire in his eyes and in his voice,
+yet a moment later he was again the most reserved of men and
+conversation lagged.
+
+It happened three days ago. He has paid me four visits since and I
+notice with astonishment, with curiosity and with alarm, that this man
+is in love with me.
+
+How long has he loved me?
+
+His love is like a warm mantle 'round my shoulders on a chilly night. It
+exudes warmth, strength, beatitude, yet there is none of the animal.
+
+He is a good talker on a thousand and one subjects, a thinker and
+psychologist. Psychology is his strong point. He argues brilliantly on
+the subject, yet I need only look at him to upset his _thesis_, to make
+him stammer and redden.
+
+He's no Count Bielsk and will never tell me of his own accord that he
+loves me. Is his admiration greater than his love? Perhaps so. It gives
+me a feeling of security.
+
+Lucretia knows, but in the presence of the Tisch, he plays the servant,
+deeming himself thrice honored by being allowed to breathe the same air
+as her Imperial Highness.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 15, 1899_.
+
+I frequently drive to the _Bois_ nowadays with the children, the _Bois_,
+where I was so happy with Him.
+
+Romano was right, a thousand times right, that he abandoned me when our
+love was at its zenith.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _At Midnight._
+
+It's done.
+
+Barthels came tonight. He was so feverish, so passionate, there was so
+much humble solicitation in his looks and manners, I was moved to pity.
+
+This man is too over-awed by my rank to ever permit himself to express
+his feelings by word of mouth. He talked of everything but love and was
+in the midst of a learned dissertation when I sunk my eyes in his and
+said:
+
+"Why do you try to hide things from me? Don't I know what's in your
+heart?"
+
+Like a little criminal--as my oldest boy does occasionally--he turned
+red, then white, then red again. He buried his face in his hands. He
+trembled. He seemed to be crying. I arose, and lightly laid my hand upon
+his blonde head.
+
+He's got the finest, silkiest hair in the world, shimmering like beaten
+gold.
+
+And then he lay at my feet, covering them with kisses. And instantly all
+his force, his courage, his eloquence returned.
+
+He went away like a man a-dreaming.
+
+I long for him; I confess I long for him. Whether I love him or not I
+don't know. But that I know, I _will_ love him.
+
+And if I cannot, what matters it? I don't have to love to be happy. To
+_be_ loved is enough. I want to be his Queen, his life.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 1, 1899_.
+
+Privy Councillor von Barthels told the King that my delicate condition
+needs constant watching. I go to his clinic every second day, while he
+visits me once or twice daily at the palace.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Like Melita I am never a bit repentant of my peccadilloes.
+
+If I don't want to do a thing, neither Kaiser, King, George, Frederick
+Augustus, my parents, the Pope, nor the whole world, can make me. But if
+I resolve to follow my sweet inclinations, rueing and pining are out of
+question.
+
+Ferdinand is the most devoted of lovers. He has unlimited
+tendernesses--a new experience for me.
+
+The lover of my girlhood days overwhelmed me by audacity. The Shah used
+me like a show-girl. Romano was imperious, super-mannish. For him I was
+only the female of the species.
+
+Sometimes, in the midst of an embrace, Ferdinand suddenly seems to
+recollect that a Queen trembles in his arms; the master turns _ame
+damnee_. I am Sultana, Louise-Catherine.
+
+Like Catherine the Great, I would throw millions to my favorites and
+millions more when I dismissed one. At any rate, I would give each a
+hundred thousand marks "to furnish himself with linen and silks,"--a
+_mot_ invented by the Semiramis of the North.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 5, 1899_.
+
+No more clinic for me. Ferdinand begged so hard, that I allowed him to
+introduce his wife. She came in after we finished our "consultation," a
+little heap of misfortune, execrably dressed, frightened, almost dead
+with submissiveness.
+
+And I am robbing this poor creature; it's like stealing pennies from a
+child. And under her own roof.
+
+It must not be. I am going to the country.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLI
+
+AN ATROCIOUS ROYAL SCANDAL
+
+    A royal couple that shall be nameless--The voluptuous Duchess--Her
+    husband the worst of degenerates--"What monsters these royalties
+    be"--Nameless outrages--A Duchess forced to have lovers--Ferdinand
+    and I live like married folk--Duchess feared for her life--Her
+    husband murdered her--I scold and humiliate my overbearing Grand
+    Mistress--The medical report too horrible to contemplate.
+
+
+    ----R, _July 15, 1899_.
+
+I am afraid to date this entry. Another terrible indictment of royalty.
+And, as usual, things criminal are at the bottom of the abuse of
+sovereign power.
+
+The Duchess had a baby and asked me to be godmother to the little girl.
+The King, eager to oblige his rich cousin, favored the journey. I
+insisted that Ferdinand accompany me. "Marie," I said, "hates Tisch, and
+she must, under no circumstances, be commanded to attend me." Lucretia
+would do. It would be cheaper.
+
+The King first wouldn't hear of Dr. von Barthels going. People might
+think I had some chronic disease. But he finally gave in for the sake of
+the child I expect. "We need a few princes more from you," said His
+Majesty benignly. "When you got about a dozen boys, you can rest."
+Pleasant job, that of a Crown Princess.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    ----R, _July 16, 1899_.
+
+The Duchess is a pretty woman, her face a lovely oval. She has small
+eyes, the color of amethysts. Her complexion is as white and harmonious
+as if she washed in sow's milk, like the late Ninon.
+
+Her mouth is sweet, but certain lines indicate that it can bite as well
+as smile. She has abundant hair, the color of Ferdinand's.
+
+This dainty, albeit voluptuous, little person, is mated to a bull-necked
+He, pompous, broad and full of the conceit of the _duodez_ satrap.
+
+Marie was forced to marry him; their honeymoon scarcely lasted a
+fortnight and he treated her shamefully after that. Of course, babies
+she must bear like any other "royal cow."
+
+Gradually, very gradually, she got over her disappointment and shyness,
+developing into a cunning, world-wise woman. Then came the man she was
+bound to love, even as the violet is bound to be kissed by the sun. She
+had no scruples about accepting him, thinking herself entitled to
+compensation for the sorrows of her married life. And revenge is sweet.
+
+The Duke found them out in the first month of their young love, walked
+into her boudoir one fine afternoon and remarked casually that none of
+his hats would fit him,--"on account of the horns you kindly planted on
+my forehead."
+
+Marie was more dead than alive when he asked her for the key of her
+writing desk. She lied and lied; to no purpose.
+
+He kicked open the writing desk, and with his iron fists broke the
+shelves and pigeon holes, laying bare a secret drawer and stacks of love
+letters it shielded. These he confiscated. Then locked himself into his
+room to enjoy his disgrace. This monster is a _Masochist_ and Sadist
+combined. He loves both to inflict suffering upon himself and upon
+others.
+
+What monsters royalties be!
+
+In the meanwhile Marie experienced all the tortures of purgatory; she
+thought of flight, of suicide. Before she could indulge in either her
+husband was back: Othello in the last act.
+
+Marie was frightened stiff, her brain a whirl, her limbs inert. Rape
+most foul this crowned satyr committed. "He fell upon me as a pack of
+hounds overwhelm a hunted, wounded she-stag," she said.
+
+Afterwards he commanded her to describe minutely every detail of her
+relations with the other. He was primed with the letter-accounts; he
+made her dot her amorous I's and cross her bawdry T's. And every attempt
+at omission he punished with kicks and cuffs; no drayman or brick-layer
+could give a more expert exhibition of woman-beating! And he violated
+her again.
+
+This was the beginning of a series of outrages of the same gross
+character. Marie suffered for years and years that His Royal Highness
+may gratify his unclean fancies: he the pander; she the Cyprian.
+
+"If I ceased having lovers, I think he would kill me," says Marie.
+
+Alas, such is the stuff "God's Anointed" are made of! In the face of
+such, we pronounce a hypocritical _j'accuse_ upon the Louis's and
+Pompadours, upon Marie Antoinette even.
+
+The Duchess, who knows, gave Ferdinand an apartment near my own. We are
+living here like man and wife. He sometimes calls me "_Frau Professor_."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _July 19, 1899_.
+
+Marie is dead. "Died suddenly," said the telegram. I understand now why
+she begged me, with tears in her eyes, to remain at least two weeks. She
+was afraid that, though ill and suffering after the confinement, he
+would treat her as he did when he first found her unfaithful.
+
+"Don't go," she cried. "It will be my death." And when I showed her the
+King's letter commanding me to return at once, she made her confidential
+tire-woman swear on the Bible that she wouldn't leave her for a minute,
+day or night, until she herself released her from the promise.
+
+Private advices from ----r say His Highness brutally kicked the faithful
+maid out of his wife's bedroom and outraged his sick wife while the
+servant kept thundering at the door, denouncing her master a murderer.
+
+Ferdinand says the great majority of crowned heads are sexual
+voluptuaries, deserving of the penitentiary or the straight-jacket.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _August 1, 1899_.
+
+I caught the Tisch stealing one of my letters. Happily there was nothing
+incriminating in it, though addressed to Ferdinand,--just the letter the
+Crown Princess would write to a Privy Councillor. But the petty theft
+indicates that she suspects. Prince George, I am told, receives a report
+from her every few days.
+
+Well, I had my revenge. The Queen called today to see the children, and
+when Her Majesty and myself withdrew into my closet, the Tisch, who had
+been spying, didn't retire as promptly as she might.
+
+"Can't you see that you are _de trop_," I said sharply to her. "Please
+close the door from outside." The Baroness gave a cry of dismay and the
+Queen was scandalized.
+
+"Louise," she said, "that is no way to treat servants. You should always
+try to be kind and considerate with them."
+
+"I am, thanks, Your Majesty," I replied. "All the officials and servants
+love me, but I have very good reasons for treating the Tisch as I do."
+
+Of course, George will hear of this, and the Tisch will be reprimanded
+by him as well. Spies that compromise themselves, compromise their
+masters.
+
+The same evening I said to the Tisch in the presence of the nurses:
+
+"My dear Baroness, I wish you would display a little more tact. Listen
+at my doors as much as you like, but whatever you do, don't spy on Her
+Majesty in my house." She exuded a flood of tears and I sent her to her
+room. "Don't come back until you can show a pleasant face. I want to see
+none other around me."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _August 2, 1899_.
+
+Ferdinand received a medical report from ----r. My first private advices
+regarding Marie's death were correct, but the additional details given
+are too horrible to contemplate.
+
+The poor Duchess was brutally murdered. She died cursing her crowned
+murderer.
+
+The manner in which she was put to death can only be likened to that of
+the lover in Heinrich von Kleist's poetically sublime, but morally
+atrocious, tragedy, _Penthesilcia_, except that, in poor Marie's case,
+the _woman_ suffered from the awful frenzy of the male, in whom the
+"gentlest passion" degenerated in Saturnalia of revolting cruelty. The
+Duke killed Marie because _doing so gave him the most damnable
+pleasure,--her the most excruciating pain_.
+
+Yet the King's will is the highest law and criminals on thrones laugh at
+the criminal code.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLII
+
+I LOSE ANOTHER OF MY LOVERS
+
+    Happily no scandal--Rewarded for bearing children--$1250--for
+    becoming a mother--Royal poverty--Bernhardt, the black sheep, in hot
+    water again--The King rebukes me for taking his part.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _August 10, 1899_.
+
+Frederick Augustus sent for Ferdinand and gave him to understand that he
+had received divers anonymous letters, connecting my name with that of
+the Privy Councillor. "Of course I don't believe a word of it," said my
+husband, "but one in my position cannot afford to flout public opinion.
+It will be for the best, if you cease your services to Her Imperial
+Highness."
+
+Upon the same day Ferdinand received orders from the King to stop his
+visits.
+
+The Baroness's doings, of course,--pin-pricks when she would like to
+shoot with sharp cartridges. She evidently doesn't know the full extent
+of our intimacy. As to Ferdinand, he acted the coward, left my letters
+unanswered and didn't make the slightest attempt to continue relations
+that might possibly turn out to his disadvantage.
+
+He is contemptible. My heart is unengaged, but my pride sadly humbled.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _February 15, 1900_.
+
+The King sent me an emerald, one-twentieth the size of that given me by
+the Shah of Persia. Frederick Augustus did himself proud and, on his
+part, I gained a pearl necklace in acknowledgment of my renewed services
+to the state. Little Marguerite was born January 24.
+
+Frederick Augustus also gave me five thousand marks spending money. Not
+much for a multi-millionaire's wife or daughter, I reckon, but a
+terrible lot for an Imperial Highness.
+
+When I read of the sums the Vanderbilts, Astors, Goulds and other
+dollar-kings spend in Paris and London, and even with us in Dresden, I
+sometimes wish I could exchange places with an American Duchess or
+Countess long enough to buy all the things beautiful and pretty I would
+like to own. An awful thing is royal poverty, but the reputation of
+affluence and unlimited resources, stalking ahead of us, whenever we
+enter a store or bargain with a jeweler, is worse.
+
+"Your Imperial Highness is pleased to joke," says my man-milliner, when
+I admit, unblushingly, that I haven't the wherewithal to buy the things
+I dote on.
+
+Wait till I am Queen, modistes, store-keepers, jewelers! The new Majesty
+will show you that she cares for money only to get rid of it.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _February 20, 1900_.
+
+This morning Lucretia came running to the nursery and whispered to me:
+"Imperial Highness, quick, to the boudoir. He begged so hard, I smuggled
+him in."
+
+She couldn't say more, for the Tisch was watching us. What new trouble
+was brewing? Could it be Romano, dare-devil, who had come back to me?
+
+If it was that poltroon, Ferdinand, I would have him thrown out by my
+lackeys.
+
+The mysterious visitor doffed wig and false moustache. "It's me," cried
+Bernhardt. "You are my only hope."
+
+"What have you been doing again?"
+
+"They threaten to banish my girl from the garrison and I won't stand for
+it. If they send her away or imprison her, I will kick up such a row,
+all Europe shall hear of it."
+
+"But why this masquerade?"
+
+"S-s-sh!" whispered the young prince. "I came without leave." Quickly,
+breathlessly, he continued: "I hear you are in His Majesty's good
+graces. Go and see him on my behalf. Persuade him to annul the order of
+banishment or render it ineffective."
+
+"Bernhardt," I said, "why don't you marry?"
+
+"If I could get a girl like you, Louise, I would--today, tomorrow, but
+the royal scare-crows that will have penniless me,--much obliged! You
+are a very exceptional woman," he added earnestly.
+
+We held a council of war, discussing the situation from every
+view-point, and finally I agreed to see Baumann.
+
+"I'll have to vouch for your future good conduct," I said.
+
+"On condition that they leave my girl alone."
+
+"Precisely. And on your part you give me your word of honor not to
+scandalize the people of your new garrison; to gradually break with the
+girl and, in the end, get married."
+
+"You are a brick, Louise," cried Bernhardt, and before I could shake him
+off, he was kissing me all over my face. No cousinly or brotherly
+kisses! His lips were apart, there was passion in his embrace. I
+struggled, but his hand pressed against my back. What strength the
+rascal's got!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _February 21, 1900_.
+
+The King is adamant. I no sooner mentioned Bernhardt's name than his
+face froze.
+
+"Does your husband know about your interference for that rake?"
+
+When I answered in the negative, he praised Frederick Augustus for
+strict submission to the royal will and upbraided me for "upholding
+Bernhardt in his wickedness."
+
+"The boy is desperate," I said.
+
+"If he is desperate," cried the King, "let him do the one reasonable and
+honorable thing: mend his evil ways. It will come easy if he seeks true
+strength in prayer, in fasting and religious discipline."
+
+"I submit to your Majesty that it might be well to send Bernhardt
+travelling."
+
+"On a tour of inspection of houses of ill-fame?" interrupted Albert
+coldly. "This is a mere waste of words," he added, looking towards the
+door, "and I'm sorry that Your Imperial Highness has the bad taste to
+take the part of this disobedient, immoral and altogether reprehensible
+_Lausbub_."
+
+That meant my dismissal. I shudder when I think of the consequences of
+the King's obstinacy.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIII
+
+THE CROWN PRINCESS QUELLS A RIOT
+
+    Asked to play the coward, and I refuse--A hostler who would die for
+    a look from me--Hostler marriages in royal houses--Anecdotes and
+    unknown facts concerning royal ladies and their offspring--Refuse
+    police escort and rioters acclaim me--Whole royal family proud of my
+    feat.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 3, 1900_.
+
+Behold Louise, a political personage!
+
+I was driving with my little ones in the _Bois_ yesterday afternoon. We
+occupied an open court carriage, conspicuous for livery and magnificent
+horse-flesh, for I love display and the children enjoy it. We were
+driving along leisurely enough when there was hasty clatter of hoofs and
+wheels behind. Presently a royal _coupe_ dashed up alongside.
+
+The Tisch stuck her head out:
+
+"Imperial Highness--the town's in revolt.--Socialist riot. They are
+marching upon the palace.--For the love of God, return at once. Your
+Imperial Highness must take a seat in this inconspicuous carriage. We
+will change to the first _Droschke_ we meet, going through
+side-streets."
+
+"My dear Baroness," I answered, "it's not in my nature to shirk peril.
+If I were to be hanged and quartered and could avoid that unpleasantness
+by changing from my carriage to a cab--I would be hanged and quartered.
+Take the children and return to the palace any way you like.
+
+"As for me, I'll go back as Her Imperial Highness, the Crown Princess of
+Saxony, and my coachman will drive slowly."
+
+I kissed the children, and the _coupe_ rolled away at a sharp clip.
+
+Calling the coachman by name, I commanded him: "You heard what my Grand
+Mistress said. Riot or no riot, I am solely responsible for my own
+safety. You will take orders from no one but me, neither from the mob
+nor the police."
+
+The coachman lifted his hat respectfully and bowed a submissive "At Your
+Imperial Highness's orders." The groom, a young, good-looking fellow,
+struck the broadsword at his side.
+
+"There is some good steel in this, Your Imperial Highness," he said with
+sparkling eyes. I believe this poor fellow would have died for a single
+look from me.
+
+Among royal servants, the most devoted are those connected with the
+_Marstall_. No wonder so many of my sisters born on the steps of the
+throne, fell in love with their Master of Horse or equerries; some with
+mere hostlers, like Queen Christina of Spain, the mother of my aunt
+Isabelle, of amorous memory. Her lover, Munoz, of the Body Guards, was
+a famous equestrian and two years younger than Christina. He managed
+horses so well, she thought it would be great fun to boss this giant.
+But it ended by the brute lording it over her, the "Catholic Majesty."
+By the way, I wonder what became of Christina's and Munoz's several
+children. While they lived together from 1833 to 1844 without the
+sanction of either law or church, they were "regularly married" in the
+end, the hostler, Munoz, metamorphosing into Duke Rianzares. Yet the
+_Almanach de Gotha_ knows not their progeny when, as "love children,"
+they should live long and happily.
+
+Another "hostler-marriage" occurred in the family of the proud Kaiser,
+the contracting parties being Princess Albrecht of Prussia and a groom,
+whose name I forget. This Princess, Marianne of the Netherlands, brought
+the first "real" money into the Hohenzollern family, and her husband,
+Albrecht, was long regarded the Croesus among German princes.
+
+After the divorce, His Royal Highness forced the ex-wife to marry the
+hostler, and the bloom of forbidden love having worn off in the
+meantime, Marianne seldom passed a day without being soundly beaten by
+the plebeian. Maybe she liked it. Some women do.
+
+Today her offspring with Master Fisticuffs are sturdy farmers in
+Silesia, but two of the three sons she had with the royal Prince, as
+well as the sons the royal Prince had with his second wife, Rosalie von
+Rauch, are degenerates. Rosalie's sons are known as Counts Hohenau and
+the wife of the elder, Fritz, is giving my astute and pious cousin, the
+Kaiserin, considerable heart-ache.
+
+Curious, isn't it? The children of the "adulteress" are successful men
+and women, aids in the progress of the world; those of the blood royal,
+in double or single doses, a menace to public morality. This much for
+your royal inbred custom.
+
+But back to Dresden. The order to drive slowly was soon rescinded, for I
+was burning to see a riot at close range. "_Plein carriere_," I
+commanded, and my fast _Carrossiers_ went at a tremendous rate for two
+miles. The moment I saw, in the distance, knots of people standing round
+or moving in the direction of the palace, I cried: "_Schritt_," and we
+proceeded as leisurely as if following a funeral.
+
+As we turned around a corner, a detachment of gendarmes, sent to watch
+for me, hove into sight. Their commanding officer signalled frantically
+to the coachman to stop, but George had his instructions and proceeded.
+
+The officer spurred his horse and rode up to me, questioning me with his
+eyes.
+
+"My orders," I explained.
+
+"Then I must escort Your Imperial Highness."
+
+"Don't."
+
+"Strict orders from my superior officer, Your Imperial Highness," and
+the gendarmes formed a _cordon_ around my carriage.
+
+I was furious. "Send for your commander."
+
+The captain of the gendarmes could not be found at once and joined my
+cavalcade only when we were opposite a living wall of excited people,
+nearly all of them workmen.
+
+"What is Your Imperial Highness's pleasure?" asked the captain, bending
+down from his horse.
+
+"Send your men away instantly."
+
+"But the responsibility?"
+
+"Rests with me and with me only. Send them away. Every one of them."
+
+The mob was watching us. I read suspicion in the eyes of those nearest.
+The captain gave the sign and the troopers turned their horses' heads,
+saluting me with their drawn swords.
+
+"May I act as Your Imperial Highness's out-rider?" asked the captain in
+a low voice.
+
+"Don't trouble yourself. I command you."
+
+The groom had been watching us. I gave the signal and we proceeded at a
+pace. The rampart of human bodies swung open and lined the sides of the
+streets. Someone cried: "Three cheers for the Crown Princess," and
+everyone responded.
+
+These Socialists, whom I had been taught to hate and despise, behaved
+in exemplary style. When I dismissed their tyrants, the gendarmes, they
+immediately took me under their protection. I am sure anyone daring to
+insult me, or raise a hand against me, would have fared badly at the
+hands of his fellows.
+
+I was all smiles, bowing right and left. Labor agitators raised their
+hats to me, mothers offered their children that I might pat their little
+hand, or lay mine on their head--a veritable triumph!
+
+When I drove into the palace yard, the Guards rushed out to do me honor.
+The Queen, the King and Prince George saluted me from the windows of
+their apartments.
+
+Frederick Augustus embraced me in front of everybody. In short I was
+made a hero of.
+
+I afterwards learned that as soon as the palace knew of the incipient
+riot, the King sent word to all members of the royal family, ordering
+them to stay in their apartments. They were even forbidden to show
+themselves at the windows overlooking the palace square.
+
+Learning that I had gone driving, mounted grooms were dispatched in all
+directions to intercept me. The Tisch, being responsible for the royal
+children, got the fastest team the court commands and started for the
+_Bois_.
+
+It gave me some satisfaction to observe that I arrived before her. Of
+course, I never doubted the children's safety.
+
+The evening papers devoted columns to the little incident and Prince
+George had the great sorrow to hear the King say: "A dare-devil, that
+Louise, but she did the right thing. By pretending confidence in the
+loyalty of the people, she successfully gulled them. The riot's back was
+broken when she showed a bold front."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIV
+
+THE NEW LOVER, AND "I PLAY THE HUSSY FOR FAIR"
+
+    Who is that most exquisite _Vortaenzer_?--A lovely boy--"Blush, good
+    white paper"--I long for Henry--My eyes reflect love--"I must see
+    you tonight. Arrange with Lucretia"--Sorry I ever loved a man before
+    Henry--Poetry even--I try to get him an office at court--Afraid
+    women will steal him.
+
+
+    PILLNITZ, _September 5, 1900_.
+
+Dance at the royal summer residence. Concentrated _ennui_ as a rule, but
+a complete success this time.
+
+I have seen Him,--capital "H." He is the one man for me.
+
+I am happy; I am myself again. All sorrows are forgotten. I am ten years
+younger.
+
+Love at first sight. I the aggressor. I must be getting very clever
+since I managed to hide it from hundreds of searching eyes, even from my
+entourage.
+
+"Lucretia," I whispered breathlessly to my confidante, "find out the
+name of the _Vortaenzer_, quick."
+
+The _Vortaenzer_, at royal courts, is a sort of official master of the
+dance, who sets the pace for the company, combining the duties of
+master of ceremonies and of dancing master.
+
+The more I looked at the _Vortaenzer_, the more he enchanted me. Taller
+than any other man present, elegant, blonde, clean-shaven. Not an ounce
+of superfluous flesh, I judged. Might be the reincarnation of the _Duc_
+de Richelieu, who seduced my three cousins d'Orleans.
+
+His face is livid with white and carmine tints; his eyes glow with an
+irresistible charm. That figure of his! The elegance of the palm tree,
+both straight and flexible. And the infinity of grace as he waltzed that
+little Baroness around.
+
+"Baron Bergen, of the Guards," breathed Lucretia into my ear.
+
+"My Master of Ceremony will command Baron Bergen at the end of this
+dance."
+
+When he stood before me, bowing and smiling, the idea that he was
+Richelieu reincarnated became almost a certainty with me.
+
+Like Richelieu, his face has the refinement that we admire in women (I
+forgot to say that I became infatuated with him merely from seeing a
+back view of the man. When he turned around, I was lost).
+
+While he chanted the usual compliments, my eyes hung upon his cherry
+lips, reveled in his white, strong teeth. The man I want. I say it
+without shame, without care.
+
+Blush, good, white paper! I am giving an account of my feelings, and if
+they be impure, there's something wrong with nature.
+
+Even as I write, I tremble with longing, with desire for Henry.
+
+Ten days since we first met. It might have been this morning, so lively
+and overwhelming is the recollection. I am impatient for his kisses, for
+his blonde loveliness, for his whole self,--just as if we hadn't loved
+and kissed scarce an hour ago.
+
+"My horse, Lucretia. We'll go for a canter. I must have air and plenty
+of it."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    PILLNITZ, _September 10, 1900_.
+
+I must give some additional account of our first meeting at the court
+ball. Ah, I was the hussy for fair! He couldn't help seeing the
+impression he made upon me. My eyes must have reflected it in letters of
+flame. I wish he were as bold as the _Duc_, who slept on a pillow
+stuffed with the hair of his mistresses, past and present.
+
+I never made such advances to any man. I was gone clean off my head.
+
+When he reddened and when his left hand, resting on the hilt of his
+sword, trembled, I became intoxicated.
+
+And I danced with him, and I was angry with myself for lacking the
+courage to say: "Feel my heart beat." My great-great-aunt and namesake,
+Marie Antoinette, did and won the love of her life,--Fersen.
+
+But we _fin de siecle_ women are cowards. All I said to him was: "I must
+see you tonight. Arrange with Lucretia."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _September 30, 1900_.
+
+Summer heat continues, but no country-seat for me! The town is a much
+safer place for lovers, and old Countess Baranello keeps open house for
+us all the year round. We meet daily. I persuaded Henry's colonel that
+the lieutenant would never be a courtier unless he saw more of court
+life and was relieved, to a certain extent, of duties on the drill
+ground.
+
+We see each other mornings or afternoons at the Countess's. The evenings
+we spend at the theatre together, I in the box, he in the _fauteuil_
+once sacred to Romano. Every Saturday afternoon we concoct the
+repertoire for the week following, and he goes at once to secure tickets
+for the various entertainments I intend to visit for his sake.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _October 1, 1900_.
+
+I wish I had never loved any man before Henry. I wish he had known me as
+an innocent girl. I wish I wasn't royal. Then I could get a divorce and
+marry him, but now, if I got ten divorces, he would always be the
+insignificant Baron, I the Princess of the Blood.
+
+And I couldn't see my love humiliated!
+
+As a talisman he wears on his chest a golden locket with my miniature.
+In exchange he gave me a _Portebonheur_ with his picture and a few sweet
+words.
+
+So help me, God, I am in love with this man,--love him to the verge of
+poetry. Indeed, I am writing silly verse in his honor, and later haven't
+the courage to show it to him. _Par example_:
+
+    I want you most, dear, when the sunset bright
+      Makes of the hills a glorious funeral pyre,
+    So die the love-light in your eyes, if die it must,
+      And leave the wondrous, throbbing silence of the night.
+
+Henry isn't very intellectual, I am afraid, but he is the finest
+horseman in the world.
+
+If I were Queen, I would barter a regiment to have him appointed my
+Chief Master of Horse. Augustus of the three-hundred and fifty-two sold
+one for his first night with Cosel.
+
+I am racking my brains for a pretense to have him appointed to court
+duty,--anything to give him the _entree_ to my apartments. But he is far
+too beautiful. The sanctimonious cats that envy me my happiness, that
+look upon love as a crime, would at once combine to destroy him.
+
+Well, we'll have to bear with the difficulties of the situation forced
+upon us by these moral busy-bodies. As for me, I'll be thrice careful,
+for if He was taken away from me, all the joy would go out of my life.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLV
+
+LOVE AND THE HAPPINESS IT CONVEYS
+
+    My Grand Mistress suspects because I am so amiable--Pangs of
+    jealousy--Every good-looking man pursued by women--A good story of
+    my cousin, the Duchess Berri--We all go cycling together--The
+    Vitzthums--Love making on the street--A mud bath.
+
+
+    _December 15, 1900._
+
+When one is in love and loved a-plenty, weeks and months roll by without
+notice by the happy ones.
+
+For my part I never thought there was so much happiness in the world as
+I am experiencing since the beginning of September. But I have my
+troubles, too. First, the Tisch. When a lady is well pleased by her
+lover, then her eyes are bright, her cheeks glow, her lips smile; she
+bears with her entourage; she is kind to her servants. The moment I
+treated the Tisch as a human being, she began to suspect, and I am sure
+she is eating her heart out fretting because God gave me both nuts and
+teeth to crack them.
+
+But I am qualifying as an expert deceiver, and my Grand Mistress won't
+catch me in a hurry.
+
+My other great trouble is: long separations from Henry, hours upon hours
+in daytime, half the nights.
+
+What is he doing when he is not with me? Of course he pretends to tell,
+but I am not goose enough to suppose that he would incriminate himself
+for the love of truth. He is hiding things from me, perhaps cheating me.
+I have to arm myself with all the faith loving woman commands to
+forestall occasional noisy out-breaks of jealousy.
+
+Was there ever a good-looking man, women didn't try to capture and
+seduce? Manly beauty is the red rag that enthralls and excites women and
+renders them dishonest, though their honor doesn't lodge at the point
+they designate as its _habitat_.
+
+Sometimes, when in these jealous frenzies, I wish Henry had a face like
+a Chinese kite, or like Riom, husband and lover of my ancestress, the
+Duchess du Berri.
+
+She was "_satisfied_" with him, but since her lady-in-waiting, too, was,
+I might, after all, fare no better than Berri, if Henry was a toad, "his
+skin spotted like a serpent's, oily like a negro's, changeable like a
+chameleon, with a turned up nose and disproportionate mouth." Yet I
+hardly believe that, like my cousin, I would say anent a rival: "Whoever
+would not be satisfied with him, would be hard to please."
+
+Alas, with women in love the extreme of ugliness counts as triumphantly
+as the charms of Adonis. Ever since I read certain passages of Faust,
+part II, Eduard von Hartmann's "Philosophy of the Unconscious," and
+Lermontoff's "Hero of our Times," I am convinced that to love a man very
+good-looking, or, on the contrary, a perfect horror, is no sinecure.
+
+Fortunately Henry is almost penniless.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _January 2, 1901_.
+
+Henry's sister married one of the numerous Vitzthums, of the family that
+furnished the Saxon court with titled servants and _maitresses en titre_
+for the past several hundred years.
+
+I immediately sent word to her ladyship, that having taken up bicycling,
+I would be pleased to have her attend me on the wheel on the afternoon
+following. The invitation was issued from the office of my Court
+Marshal, which is controlled by the King's. Having thus secured
+beforehand His Majesty's approval, possible criticism was nipped in the
+bud. The bride asked permission to bring her husband.
+
+"Granted. Order of dress: _mufti_."
+
+This enabled us, myself and Henry, and the Count and Countess to ride
+all over town, unrecognized by either officials or the public at large.
+
+It was great fun, and I told the Vitzthums that I intended to wheel
+every morning at nine, immediately after breakfast. Count Vitzthum is
+Henry's colonel. Of course he granted both Henry and himself furlough
+for the time set.
+
+What happiness! Now I don't have to wait till afternoon and evening to
+see my lover.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _January 10, 1901_.
+
+I am so happy, I am growing careless.
+
+The Vitzthums, profiting by the fact that they are but recently married,
+prefer to travel in pairs, and always take the lead. Accordingly Henry
+and myself, incog. as far as my future subjects go, are free to indulge
+in occasional caresses and sweet nonsense-talk.
+
+I was pouring honeyed words into Henry's ears the other morning when my
+wheel skidded on the wet pavement, and before he, or I, could save me, I
+was down on my back in the mud.
+
+The fact that I was again _enceinte_, and the other fact that I was
+covered with dirt, ought to have prompted me to return to the palace at
+once, but how un-Louise-like the straight and sane course would have
+been.
+
+I allowed myself to be wiped off by Henry; then mounted my wheel anew
+and raced after the Vitzthums.
+
+Unfortunately, a reporter heard of the incident and, for the benefit of
+his pocket, made a column out of it.
+
+A few hours after the story appeared in the evening paper, the palace
+was in an uproar. The King wasn't well enough to scold me, so he
+delegated that pleasant duty to Prince George. His Royal Highness
+promptly informed me that the "damned bicycling had to stop."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVI
+
+FEARS FOR MY LOVE
+
+    Some reflections on queens of old who punished recreant
+    lovers--Henry was in debt and I gave him money--Indignities by which
+    some of that money was earned--Husband accompanies me to
+    Loschwitz--Reflections on Frederick Augustus's character.
+
+
+    _January 15, 1901._
+
+My love played the melancholy Dane for the last few days. His tenderness
+seemed labored, his spirits under a cloud. Every smile I got had to be
+coaxed from him.
+
+"The end of my happiness," I thought; "some chit of a girl dethroned
+me." And I cursed my birthday. "A kingdom for ten years off my age."
+
+And my thoughts of thoughts travelled back to the times when royal
+ladies had their rivals immured, as practiced by a Brandenburg princess
+at the Kaiser's hunting box at Gruenewald, or made a head shorter, like
+Lady Jane Grey, who was far too pretty to please Elizabeth; or shot, as
+elected by Queen Christina, _tribade_ and nymphomaniac both.
+
+And the things Queen Bess did to her unfaithfuls and the crimes Mary
+Stuart perpetrated to cheat Jeannie Bothwell out of her doughty Hepburn!
+
+"If I were Queen," I thought, and I must have spoken aloud, for Henry
+said: "You would make me a great lord, love, wouldn't you, give me the
+best paying office at court, but that's small comfort to my creditors
+today."
+
+"It's creditors, mere creditors bothering you?" I almost shouted with
+joy. This man was still mine. No one had succeeded in luring him away
+from me. I threw myself upon him and nearly smothered him.
+
+Filthy lucre, or the want of it, oppressing my boy. Money, miserable
+money, caused me to doubt his very loyalty.
+
+"How much?"
+
+He stuttered and denied and swore it was all a mistake and that I had
+misunderstood him. "As an army officer----"
+
+"Don't talk like Frederick Augustus. It will give me the greatest
+pleasure in the world to arrange your affairs, dearest."
+
+I got him to name the sum after a while. What a pity I am not rich. As
+Catharine sent her Orloffs and Potemkins and Zoritchs to the State
+Treasury to help themselves as they saw fit, so I would gladly turn
+fortunes over to Henry, never asking for an accounting.
+
+But this Imperial Highness is wretchedly poor, like most royal women
+not actually seated on the throne. I can't offer my paramour financial
+independence, not even luxury, but, thank heaven, I saved up enough to
+provide for his present needs, even if my treasury be drained to the
+last twenty-mark piece, and I will have to cut short my charities for
+the next quarter of a year. But he must not know these sordid details.
+
+Some day I will be Queen. I will reimburse the poor and I will be a true
+Catharine to Henry.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _January 16, 1901_.
+
+I brought my mite to our rendezvous. Mostly in small bills and
+twenty-mark pieces. If Henry knew that many of these were earned in the
+right royal fashion of having them slipped down one's stocking by a
+husband, too drunk to distinguish a royal palace from a dance-hall!
+
+He told me honestly enough how he got into debt. "How can one lay by for
+a rainy day when one hasn't got anything?"
+
+I appreciate the play of words, for I am in the same predicament.
+
+Only once has Henry touched a card, but he lost considerably in horse
+deals, as most young army officers do.
+
+His sister made a rich marriage, but he wouldn't discover himself to
+her. If she asked money of her husband, there might be trouble, for
+Vitzthum is not a liberal man.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _April 1, 1901_.
+
+The children's health called for country air and I was quasi-forced to
+retire to Loschwitz, though I have a thousand and one reasons for
+remaining in Dresden. Frederick Augustus accompanies us. After the
+strenuous city life (in Dresden!), he needs a change and a long rest
+from drinking and carousing, he says boastingly.
+
+Of course, while he is here, I dare not invite the Vitzthums. But as
+soon as he is gone, they shall come for a couple of weeks, and their
+presence will make Henry's possible.
+
+It's dreadful the way I miss the sweet boy. I suffer like a dog, when
+the longing seizes me, suffer both in heart and body. When I contemplate
+his miniature, tears come into my eyes. I often cry for hours thinking
+of him.
+
+And to have to endure this great booby of a husband of mine day and
+night, especially nights. It's almost more than I can bear.
+
+The grossness of his egotism reminds me of the story told of King James,
+whom the English got rid of in 1689.
+
+The Dutch William, instead of waiting peacefully for the heritage of his
+father-in-law, went to claim it before his death, and James, pressed on
+all sides by enemies, decided upon flight.
+
+One Sunday, in the month of December, his devotions over, he dismissed
+all his servants and advised his last partisans to turn towards the
+rising sun.
+
+After which, he lay for an hour with his wife, the better to take leave
+of her."
+
+The very thing Frederick Augustus would do if war or revolution made us
+fugitives.
+
+I never realized the diversity in our natures as much as I do now, when
+all my thoughts go out to another, when even connubial tendernesses seem
+like whip-strokes.
+
+The further our souls draw apart, the more disgusting this forced
+intimacy, the prostitution under the marriage vow, which I detest and
+abhor.
+
+But what will I do? Shut my door to him? He would kick it in, or climb
+through the window. It's easier to submit to the violation of my person
+than to breaking of locks and furniture.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVII
+
+LOVE'S INTERMEZZO
+
+    Bernhardt takes advantage of my day-dreams--My husband's indolent
+    _gaucherie_--Violent love-making--Ninon who loved families, not
+    men--Does Bernhardt really love me?
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _April 10, 1901_.
+
+Fortunately Bernhardt came for a few days to relieve the monotony of my
+alcove life _par le droit du plus fort_.
+
+Tall stories of dissipation, indiscipline, scandal, had preceded the
+poor fellow. No doubt, his military superiors got orders to make his
+life as unhappy as they possibly can, and he retaliates.
+
+The Prince told me that, at last, he had succeeded arranging for an
+audience with the King. His Majesty had denied himself to Bernhardt for
+months past. He managed the coveted boon only by the intervention of
+various high generals and the threat to appeal to the Kaiser.
+
+The Royal House of Saxony, while compelled to recognize William as
+War-Lord, doesn't court his interference, or attempted interference, in
+matters military.
+
+Flushed with this initial success and expecting lots of good things in
+the future, Bernhardt was bent upon having a good time. He drank with
+Frederick Augustus, made love to Lucretia and squeezed the chambermaids
+on his floor to his heart's content.
+
+To me he was the most gallant of cousins and, glad to contribute to the
+happiness of the poor fellow, I gave him plenty of rope, perhaps too
+much.
+
+On the second day of his stay we had a very merry dinner, having
+dispensed for the time with titled servants.
+
+After dinner the three of us retired to the veranda. I was in a rocker,
+showing perhaps more of my ankles than was absolutely necessary.
+Frederick Augustus was smoking dreamily. Like an animal he likes to
+sleep after he has gorged himself.
+
+Bernhardt, with my permission, had thrown himself on a wicker lounge and
+was absorbing cigarettes at a killing rate. I bantered him on his
+laziness. But he only sighed.
+
+"You wish that audience was past and forgotten," I asked.
+
+"Pshaw, I'm thinking of something prettier than the King."
+
+Remembering Bernhardt's chief weakness, I indulged in the old joke,
+"_Cherchez la femme_."
+
+Bernhardt replied, with another succession of groans, "You are right,
+Louise; _parfaitement, cherchez la femme_."
+
+"Egads," grunted Frederick Augustus, glad for an excuse to go to his
+room, or play a game of pinochle with his aides, "egads, if you indulge
+in intellectualities, I had better go. A full stomach and French
+conversation--whew!"
+
+The Tisch was in Dresden; _Fraeulein_ von Schoenberg with the children,
+Lucretia flirting somewhere at a neighboring country chalet. We were
+alone on the remote terrace and it was getting dark. Bernhardt sat up
+and looked at me with eyes of life-giving fire, but continued silent.
+
+"You want me to think that you command the rays of the sun stolen by
+Prometheus?"
+
+He answered not, but sought to burn the skin of my neck and bosom by
+those Prometheus rays.
+
+Now, in the morning I got a note from Henry, and I had been thinking of
+the dear boy every minute. I was longing for him; my heart, my senses
+were crying for him.
+
+I forgot Bernhardt; I forgot all around me. With my fancies focussed on
+my lover, I leaned back in my armchair, gazing at the rising moon. My
+word, at that moment I was lost to everything.
+
+I half-awoke from my dream when I heard Bernhardt rise. A moment later I
+felt his eyes prowling over my body. Then a shadow darkened my face and
+Bernhardt said with a strange quaver in his voice:
+
+"_Cherchez la femme._ You are the woman, Louise, you and none else."
+
+And wild, forbidden kisses burned on my face, on my neck, on my breasts.
+Both hands claimed a lover's liberties.
+
+I was taken completely unawares; in my mind of minds I was in the
+Countess's pavilion, receiving Henry's caresses. All sense of location
+had vanished. And, thinking of my lover, I clasped both arms about
+Bernhardt's neck and drew him to me. We kissed like mad. The love feast
+for Henry became Bernhardt's in the twinkling of an eye.
+
+Whether he felt like a thief, I don't know; for my part my senses
+responded to Henry, not to his substitute.
+
+How long this embrace lasted, I don't know. Somebody, or some noise,
+caused us to separate.
+
+I fled and locked myself in my room.
+
+"Tell His Royal Highness he must excuse me. I can't see him before he
+goes away. Say I have a headache, or the gout, I don't care which," I
+commanded Lucretia next morning.
+
+The previous night I had denied myself to Frederick Augustus, though he
+entreated and raved.
+
+While I appreciate the arch-Lais's _bon mot_ that "one can't judge of a
+family by a single specimen," which made Ninon talk of her lovers _not_
+as Coligny, Villarceau, Sevigne, Conde, d'Albret, etc., but as _les_
+Rochefoucaults, _les_ d'Effiats, _les_ Condes, _les_ Sevignes, etc., I
+was determined not to betray Henry by the whole House of Saxony in a
+single twelve-hours.
+
+I wonder whether this Bernhardt loves me? Perhaps, on his part, it was
+the longing for the girl he adores, as, on mine, it was longing for
+Henry that drew us together with electric force. And, of course,
+environment had something to do with it: moon, opportunity, Frederick
+Augustus's indolent _gaucherie_. Yes, why deny it, the good dinner we
+had, the champagne.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVIII
+
+GRAND MISTRESS TELLS HUSBAND I KEEP A DIARY
+
+    He wants to see it, but seems unsuspecting--Grand Mistress denies
+    that she meant mischief, but I upbraid her unmercifully--Threaten to
+    dismiss her like a thieving lackey.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _May 1, 1901_.
+
+Frederick Augustus leaves tomorrow. Forever, I thought, when he put this
+question to me:
+
+"You are keeping a Diary, Louise?"
+
+I was frightened dumb. I stared at him.
+
+"What's the matter," he laughed. "I'm not going to eat you." He didn't
+seem to be at all perturbed.
+
+"How do you know I keep a Diary?" I stuttered.
+
+Nonchalantly enough he made answer: "Your bag-of-bones Baroness told me.
+Full of forbidden things, I suppose, since you regard it a state secret.
+You often say that my education was sadly neglected. Maybe I can learn a
+thing or two from your scribblings. Let's look 'm over."
+
+By this time I had regained my composure. "Naturally," I said, "a Diary
+records thoughts and things intended for the writer only, but if you
+choose to be ungentlemanly enough to wish to peruse those pages more
+sacred than private letters, I suppose I will have to submit."
+
+Frederick Augustus changed the subject, but I felt instinctively that he
+was disappointed. Someone had played on his curiosity, and to go
+unsatisfied is not at all in this prince's line.
+
+Of course, the someone was the Tisch, but how did she know? I will ask
+her as soon as Frederick Augustus is gone.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _May 2, 1901_.
+
+"Have you ever seen my Diary?" I asked the Tisch this morning.
+
+"Never, Your Imperial Highness."
+
+"Then how do you know I keep a Diary?"
+
+"I surmised it because I saw Your Imperial Highness write repeatedly in
+one and the same book." The hussy affected a humble tone, but the note
+of triumph and hatred underlying the creature's meekness did not escape
+me.
+
+"And the mere surmise prompted you to blab to my husband, arouse his
+suspicions?"
+
+"For Heaven's sake," cried my Grand Mistress, "I had no idea that His
+Royal Highness didn't know about the Diary. Secrets between the
+Prince-Royal and Your Imperial Highness--how dare I pre-suppose such a
+state of things? His Royal Highness casually asked how the Crown
+Princess killed time in Loschwitz. I mentioned riding, driving,
+bicycling, writing letters, writing in the Diary----"
+
+My fingers itched to slap her lying face, Grand-Duchess of Tuscany
+fashion, but I kept my temper.
+
+"Listen to me," I said. "While you have secret instructions to play the
+serpent in my household and to betray, for dirty money, your mistress of
+the Blood Imperial, your duties as a spy are confined to my going and
+coming, to my exterior conduct, to my visits outside the palace, to my
+friendships, perhaps.
+
+"They cannot possibly encompass my thoughts. And my Diary is the
+repository of my thoughts--thoughts that must not be defiled by your
+favor-seeking curiosity. Be warned. The next time you dare act the
+burglar--I say _burglar_--I will kick you out of doors like a thieving
+lackey."
+
+She got as white as a sheet and hissed back: "Your Imperial Highness
+can't dismiss me. Only His Majesty has power----"
+
+I interrupted her with an imperious gesture.
+
+"I said I will kick you out of doors like a thieving lackey," I
+repeated, "and I will do so this moment if you say another word. Whether
+or not His Majesty will punish me for the act, that's _my_ business. You
+will be on the street and will stay on the street."
+
+I pointed to the door: "I dismiss you now. You will keep to your room
+for the rest of the day."
+
+I saw the Tisch was near collapse.
+
+"Your Imperial Highness deigns to insult a defenseless woman," she
+breathed as she went out.
+
+Defenseless! So is the viper that attacks one's heel! First these
+"defenseless" creatures goad one to madness, then they appeal to our
+_noblesse oblige_. The enmity between the Tisch and I is more intense
+than ever.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIX
+
+ARISTOCRATIC VISITORS
+
+    I hear disquieting news about my lover's character--The aristocracy
+    a dirty lot--Love-making made easy by titled friends--Anecdotes of
+    Richelieu and the Duke of Orleans--The German nobleman who married
+    Miss Wheeler and had to resign his birthright--The disreputable
+    business the Pappenheims and other nobles used to be in--I am afraid
+    to question my lover as to charges.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _May 15, 1901_.
+
+The Vitzthums have been visiting for a week. Henry lodges in the
+village, but spends nearly all his time in the castle and grounds. We
+play tennis, polo, ball; we drive, ride, go bicycling, we dine and sup
+together.
+
+I ought to be the happiest woman in the world, but a shadow dims the
+ideal picture my mind's eye drew of the lover.
+
+I have it recorded somewhere--I wish I hadn't, so I might doubt my
+memory--that Henry told me he never borrowed from his sister. Countess
+Vitzthum's confidences to me show that he did repeatedly, that, in fact,
+he is forever trying to borrow.
+
+"He is a spendthrift; he cannot be trusted," said his sister, who loves
+him dearly. "He will wreck his career if he continues at the pace he is
+going. Some day we may hear of him as a waiter or cab-driver in New
+York."
+
+These disclosures frightened me. I might forgive him the lie, but what
+is he doing with the money?
+
+Spending it on lewd women like Bernhardt, I suppose.
+
+I said: "Oh," and Madame von Vitzthum seemed to catch its significance.
+It occurred to her at once that she had said too much and she tried to
+minimize her brother's delinquencies. But I know.
+
+Maybe some of my money went to pay hotel expenses for----
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _At Midnight._
+
+My cousin Richelieu caused his mistresses to be painted in all sorts of
+monastic garments and licentious devices, saying: "I have my saints and
+martyrs; they are all that; but, as for virgins, there are none outside
+of Paradise." Substitute _paillards_ for the holy ones and you have the
+situation in a nutshell.
+
+The Vitzthums are panderers. They always manage to leave me alone with
+Henry. When we are a-wheel, they ride a mile ahead; while playing tennis
+one or the other aims the ball, every little while, to enter the open
+window of a summer-house, where my lover and I can exchange a few rapid
+kisses. When we are driving, without coachman or groom, of course, they
+always "feel like walking a bit," while Henry and I remain in the
+carriage.
+
+The same at the house, on the veranda. They are always _de trop_.
+Vitzthum even sacrifices himself to the extent of paying court to the
+Tisch and engaging her entire attention, if it must be. He reminds me of
+a certain colonel of the French army during the Regency.
+
+"_Monseigneur_," said this gentleman to my cousin d'Orleans, "permit me
+to employ my regiment as a guard for my wife, and I swear to you that
+nobody shall go near her but Your Highness."
+
+Of course, it's very lovely of them, but rather emphasizes the poor
+opinion I have of the nobility.
+
+Your nobleman and noblewoman adopt all tones, all airs, all masks, all
+allures, frank and false, flattering and brutal, choleric or mild,
+virtuous or bawdy--anything as long as it makes for their profit. Some
+months ago I met at the Dresden court the Dowager Countess Julie
+Feodorowna of Pappenheim, who told everybody she could persuade to
+listen that her eldest son, Max Albrecht, had to resign the succession,
+because he married beneath him, an American heiress, Miss Wheeler of
+Philadelphia.
+
+"Then you despise money?" I queried with a malicious thought just
+entering my head.
+
+"Not exactly, Your Imperial Highness," she said, "but our house
+laws----"
+
+"Those funny house laws," I smiled, "you don't say they forbid a
+Pappenheim to accept half a dozen millions from his wife, when, in days
+gone by, the Counts of Pappenheim's chief income was the tax on harlotry
+in Franconia and Swabia."
+
+The Countess nearly dropped. "Don't be alarmed," I said. "See the
+pompous looking man in the corner yonder? It's Count Henneberg. His
+forbears held the fiefship of the Wuerzburg city brothel for many hundred
+years. That's where the family fortune came from."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _May 17, 1901_.
+
+I am an ingrate. I bit the hand that fed me. Noble iniquity that yields
+such delicious crumbs of love as Henry and I stole in moments of ecstasy
+in park and parlor, in pavilion and veranda, on our drives and rides, be
+blessed a hundred times. Ah, the harvest of little tendernesses, the
+sweet words I caught on the wing--recompense for the weeks of abstinence
+I suffered!
+
+Occasionally only, very occasionally, I feel like questioning Henry as
+to the lie he was guilty of. I quizzed his sister time and again about
+his relations with women. She always gives me a knowing laugh; I wonder
+whether she means to be impertinent, or is simply a silly goose.
+
+I won't ask him. If he is innocent, as I sincerely hope, he will be
+offended. If he is not, he will be ashamed of himself and will avoid me
+in future. It's "innocent," you lose, and "guilty," you don't win.
+
+And I love him. I want him, whether he lies to me or not.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER L
+
+TO LIVE UNDER KING'S AND PRINCE GEORGE'S EYE
+
+    Abruptly ordered to the royal summer residence--The Vitzthums and
+    Henry take flight--Enmeshed by Prince George's intrigues--Those
+    waiting for a crown have no friends--What I will do when Queen--No
+    wonder Kings of old married only relatives--Interesting facts about
+    relative marriages furnished by scientist.
+
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _May 18, 1901_.
+
+All-highest order to proceed to Pillnitz, the royal summer residence,
+without delay--a command I cannot possibly evade. Conveyed in curt,
+almost insulting terms--the Tisch's work, no doubt.
+
+It came like lightning out of a blue sky, just when Henry and I had
+planned some real love-making _a la_ Dresden.
+
+The Vitzthums lost no time taking their leave when the scent of royal
+disgrace was in the air, and, as if to emphasize the obscene office they
+had assumed, they spirited Henry away ere we had time even to say
+goodbye.
+
+What a life I am leading with the ogre of the King's wrath forever
+hanging over me; Prince George's intrigues, octopus-like, enmeshing me!
+
+Ten years I have been Crown Princess of these realms. Three Princes and
+a Princess I gave to Saxony. A fifth child is trembling in my womb, yet
+every atom of happiness that falls to my lot is moulded into a strand of
+the rope fastening 'round my neck.
+
+I haven't a friend in the world. A most dangerous thing to be on good
+terms with the heirs to the crown. Makes the temporary incumbent of the
+bauble nervous, makes him jealous.
+
+When I am Queen, I will have friends in plenty. But then I won't need
+any. Immense wealth will be at my disposal. I will have offices to
+distribute, titles, crosses and stars.
+
+Instead of tolerating the serpents now coiling at my fireside ready to
+spring at a word from their master, I will appoint to court offices
+persons I love or esteem, at least.
+
+Henry shall be my Chief Equerry; the Tisch will be dismissed in
+disgrace--no pension.
+
+But I am day-dreaming again. I started out to say that I had no friends.
+Yet there's Bernhardt? Precisely--as long as I am his mistress.
+
+Marie is dead, Melita expects to be divorced before the end of the year.
+She will be a Russian Grand-Duchess, and the tedium of petty German
+court life will know her no longer.
+
+Aside from Lucretia, there isn't a man or woman at the Saxon court whom
+I can trust, for our high functionaries are only lackeys having a
+bathroom to themselves. In no other way do they differ from the servants
+who are allowed one bathroom per twenty-four heads.
+
+But the high aristocracy! Its men and women flatter us to get us into
+leading strings, try to make us pawns on the political or social
+chess-board. As a whole, they are a despicable lot.
+
+No wonder kings of old married members of their own family exclusively,
+even their sisters, _in re_ of which the learned Baron von Reitzenstein
+told me many interesting details.
+
+He copied especially from Egyptian records, but also from Armenian,
+Babylonian and Persian, to wit:
+
+Daranavausch married his niece, Phratunga.
+
+His son and successor married his niece Artayanta.
+
+Artaxerxes was also married to a niece of his.
+
+Darius II and Parysatis married their sisters.
+
+Kambyses married two of his sisters.
+
+Artachschasa II married his two daughters; Kobad his daughter Sambyke.
+
+Artaviraf, the founder of a great ancient religion, married no less than
+seven of his sisters--because "there were no other women worthy of the
+honor."
+
+According to that, the aristocracy of old must have been as rotten as
+that of our day.
+
+Lucretia is the only person I trust, and they would have robbed me of
+her services long ago if my marriage contract did not vest the power of
+dismissal in me.
+
+Unlike me, she can afford to defy the King's wrath.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LI
+
+COLD RECEPTION--ENEMIES ALL AROUND
+
+    Frederick Augustus gives his views on adultery--Doesn't care
+    personally, but "the King knows"--"Thank God, the King is ill"--I am
+    deprived of my children--Have I got the moral strength to defy my
+    enemies?
+
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 20, 1901_.
+
+I am undone. That malicious Tisch woman holds me in the hollow of her
+hand.
+
+I dropped into a sea of ice when I set foot in the castle. Long faces,
+suspicious looks, frigidity everywhere. The King treats me like a
+criminal. I wonder the guards don't refuse their _spiel_ at my coming
+and going.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 21, 1901_.
+
+Frederick Augustus arrived. He doesn't say for how long, and acts the
+icicle in the presence of others. At night he seeks his "rights," seeks
+them brutally.
+
+This afternoon he said to me:
+
+"That you made me a cuckold isn't exactly killing me; this sort of thing
+happened to better men than I, and--I was almost prepared for it. But to
+hear it announced from the King's lips----"
+
+Because His Majesty knows--Frederick Augustus raved and swore I had
+dishonored him.
+
+"If I wasn't a royal prince, I would be kicked out of the army," he
+whined.
+
+In short, adultery isn't so very reprehensible if the King doesn't know.
+
+Late tonight profound disquietude at court. The King is ill.
+
+Thank God, the audience I feared must be postponed.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 22, 1901_.
+
+It wasn't. His Majesty appointed Prince George his representative, and I
+received a command to call on him at ten sharp.
+
+I wrote on the Court Marshal's brutal invitation: "I refuse to see His
+Royal Highness."
+
+Ten minutes later the Tisch entered my apartment with a look of triumph
+on her hateful face. She handed me a letter on a golden plate and
+waited.
+
+"Your Ladyship is dismissed," I snapped.
+
+She didn't move: "I expect your Imperial Highness's commands with
+respect to the royal children," she said. "May it please Your Imperial
+Highness to read Prince George's letter."
+
+I tore open the envelope. His Majesty's representative "graciously
+permits me to see my children at nine in the morning and between five
+and six in the afternoon. At no other time, and never unless Baroness
+Tisch is in attendance."
+
+I threw the letter on the floor and trampled on it. "Get out," I
+commanded the Baroness. If she hadn't gone instantly, I believe I would
+have choked her.
+
+So I am deemed unworthy to mother the children I bore; and a spy is
+officially appointed to watch my intercourse with the little ones lest I
+corrupt them. No other inference was to be drawn from the measure.
+
+"I will show them." But no sooner was the threat launched, than a great
+fear clutched at my heart.
+
+Was I in a position to defy them? To guard the purity of the royal
+children "is the King's first duty towards his family." If he had proof
+positive that I was an impure woman, there was no use quarrelling with
+his decision. Besides, moral delinquencies engender more than physical
+weakness. I felt my boasted energy ebbing away fast.
+
+"I am without strength, unnerved, because Henry left me," I lied to
+myself. The abandoned woman is either a tigress or a kitten. I happen to
+be no tigress.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LII
+
+PRINCE GEORGE REVEALS TO ME THE DEPTH OF HIS HATRED
+
+    A terrible interview--"The devil will come to claim you"--Uncertain
+    how much the King and Prince George know--I break into the nursery
+    and stay with my children all day--Prince George insults me in my
+    own rooms and threatens prison if I disobey him.
+
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 23, 1901_.
+
+I caught Prince George in the park after laying in wait for him three
+long hours.
+
+"Why does Your Royal Highness forbid me to see my children?" I demanded,
+every nerve aquiver.
+
+"His Majesty's orders. He thinks you are not fit company for growing
+children. You are leading a godless life."
+
+"What does Your Royal Highness mean?"
+
+"What I said. A godless life, such as you entered upon, is an invitation
+to the devil. Sins are the devil's envoys. When you are black with sin,
+the devil himself will come to claim you."
+
+He dropped his theological lingo and continued: "My fine daughter-in-law
+wants to be everybody's lady-love. If she had her sweet will, she would
+ruin every young chap in the residence and the surrounding country."
+
+He looked about him and, seeing we were unobserved, eased his bile in
+this pretty epigram as rank as a serpent's saliva: "An adulterous wife,
+that's what you are. Satan alone knows how many you seduced."
+
+It was more than I could stand and I burst into tears. In moments like
+this women always cry, but even if I hadn't felt like doing so, I would
+have cried because George hates it.
+
+"Prove to me, prove to the King that you are sorry for what you have
+done, return to the path of righteousness, to God, and we will see about
+the children," he whispered as he moved away.
+
+"What does he know?" "How much have they found out?" I kept saying to
+myself as I withdrew to my lonely apartments.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 24, 1901_.
+
+No answer to the questions in my last entry. The silent persecution
+continues unabated. I am growing desperate.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 25, 1901_.
+
+This morning at eight-thirty I went to the nursery.
+
+The Baroness tried to speak to me. I held up my hand. "Not a word from
+you, or something terrible will happen."
+
+_Fraeulein_ von Schoenberg, who is really a sweet girl, offered some
+respectful advice. I begged her to be silent. If the door had been
+locked I would have forced it with the dagger I carried in my bosom.
+
+Lucretia came and whispered. "I have decided to stay, and stay I will.
+Let them do their worst if they dare," I told her.
+
+I changed the children's _curriculum_. "You can drive every day; you
+can't have mother every day. Let's have some games."
+
+I remained in the nursery till all the children were asleep. They
+partook of the breakfast, lunch and dinner I ordered for myself. A great
+treat for them. We were very happy.
+
+But I waited in vain for interference. Nothing happened to clear the
+situation. Those questions were still unanswered when I returned to my
+apartments.
+
+I had just sat down to read the evening papers, when Prince George
+entered unannounced.
+
+"If ever again you dare disobey my commands"--he shouted without
+preliminaries.
+
+I cut him short: "Are the children yours or mine?"
+
+"They belong to Saxony, to the Royal House," he bawled, and poured
+forth a torrent of abuse without giving me a chance to put in a word.
+"You shall be disciplined to the last extremity. We will imprison you in
+some lonely tower, without state or attendants. You shall not see your
+children from one year's end to the other."
+
+"Prison for the Crown Princess? Would you dare, Prince George?"
+
+"At the Tower of Nossen rooms are in readiness for your Imperial
+Highness," sneered my father-in-law as he walked out.
+
+Nossen! A ruined country-house, flanked by a mediaeval tower in the midst
+of swamps. The nearest habitation miles away. Neither railway nor
+post-office, neither telegraph nor telephone--just the place to bury one
+alive. And I only thirty-one.
+
+Augustus the Physical Strong imprisoned Countess Cosel at Nossen six
+months before he sent her to her prison-grave in Stolpen. After Cosel's
+departure, another royal mistress was lodged in Nossen, and as she would
+neither commit suicide, nor succumb to the fever, they starved her to
+death. And it all happened in the eighteenth century.
+
+The word Nossen sent cold shivers down my spine. I am sure I won't sleep
+a wink.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIII
+
+REVOLVER IN HAND, I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION
+
+    An insolent Grand Mistress, but of wonderful courage--Imprisonment,
+    threats to kill have no effect on her--Disregards my titles--My
+    lover's souvenir and endearing words--How she caused Henry to leave
+    me--My paroxysms of rage--Henry's complete betrayal of me.
+
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 26, 1901_.
+
+This morning I awoke a mental and physical wreck, but determined to
+solve those vexatious questions: "What do the King and Prince George
+know?" "What have they found out?"
+
+I slipped on a dressing-gown, fetched my small revolver from its
+hiding-place in the boudoir and rang for the Tisch.
+
+I received her politely enough. I was quiet, cold, calculating. She gave
+a start as she observed my stony countenance.
+
+"Baroness," I said, motioning her to come nearer, "explain the attitude
+assumed by His Majesty, Prince George and the rest."
+
+She shrugged her shoulders.
+
+"I want to know. Do you hear, Grand Mistress? I command you to speak," I
+cried.
+
+A sneer of contempt hovered about her lips. She is a viper, this woman,
+but has the courage of the rattle-snake in action.
+
+I turned the keys in the several doors and threw them under the bed.
+From under the pillow I drew my revolver.
+
+I showed her the weapon and calmly announced, accentuating each word:
+"You won't leave this room alive until the question I put to you is
+answered to my satisfaction. I want the whole truth. You needn't excuse
+your own part in the business. As Henri _Quatre_ said to the lover of
+Diane de Poitiers, secreted under her bed, as he threw him half a cold
+bird: 'We all want to live, some honestly, some dishonestly.' You choose
+the dishonest road. Be it so.
+
+"But I want you to state what you accuse me of. Hurry," I added
+menacingly.
+
+The Tisch was unmoved. Either she thinks me a horrible dastard or is
+brave to madness. She looked at me fearlessly and smiled. She seemed to
+enjoy my rage.
+
+"Answer or I will shoot you like the dog you are."
+
+And then her cold and fearless voice rang out: "Put your revolver away.
+I am not afraid to tell you, and that thing might go off. Is it
+possible," she continued sarcastically, "you have to ask?"
+
+This woman dared to address me "you." "Tisch," I thundered, "my title
+reads Your Imperial Highness."
+
+Another contemptuous smile curled her thin lips as she answered
+insolently: "At your commands. But if you want me to talk, put away the
+weapon. I won't open my head while threatened."
+
+I threw the revolver into a drawer of my chiffonier and the Tisch
+approached me. "Do you know this?" she hissed, whipping from her desert
+bosom the golden _Portebonheur_, Henry's present.
+
+I had missed it for two days. Fear seized my throat.
+
+"Do you know this?" repeated the Tisch, pushing the button and
+disclosing Henry's miniature with the legend "To my sweetest Louise."
+
+"Where did you get it?" I asked, half-dead with shame and fear.
+
+"Never mind. It's the last piece of evidence that fell into my hands.
+The real facts I have known for a long while."
+
+"And sold that knowledge?"
+
+"I did my duty."
+
+"Report, then."
+
+And she told the story of her infamy--or mine?
+
+My true relations with Henry were discovered by her at Loschwitz. He is
+a distant relative of hers and she an intimate friend of his mother.
+Hence she took care not to compromise the young man. The entire blame
+was put on me.
+
+"Her Imperial Highness is indulging in a dangerous flirtation with Baron
+Bergen," she advised the King. "They must be separated at once lest that
+exemplary young man fall victim to her seductive wiles. I beseech Your
+Majesty to order the Crown Princess to Pillnitz and put a stop to her
+most reprehensible conduct."
+
+Hence the royal command to proceed to Pillnitz without a moment's delay.
+"The King and Prince George deem your honor unsafe unless you are under
+their watchful eyes," she had the effrontery to tell me.
+
+She drew a key from her pocket and opened one of the bedroom doors.
+
+With her hand on the knob, she said, bowing formally:
+
+"By Your Imperial Highness's leave, I will keep the _Portebonheur_ to
+use in case you are ever tempted again 'to throw me out of doors like a
+thieving lackey!'"
+
+A low bow, a sarcastic smile,--my executioner was gone. And I broke some
+priceless bric-a-brac, stamped my foot on the pearl necklace Frederick
+Augustus had given me, tore three or four lace handkerchiefs and stuffed
+the rags in my mouth to prevent me from crying aloud.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 27, 1901_.
+
+Lucretia finished the Tisch's report. The good soul hadn't had the
+courage to tell me before, but now that the Grand Mistress had spoken,
+considerations of delicacy no longer stood in the way.
+
+What a judge of character I am, to be sure: Henry, whom I raised from
+obscurity, whom I befriended, loved, advanced, rescued from the hands of
+usurers--a traitor, pshaw, worse,--I cannot write down the word, but
+it's in my mind.
+
+Henry, who hadn't the time to take leave from me, devoted an hour to the
+Tisch before he went away with the Vitzthums.
+
+He told her all and gave her his word of honor--the honor of a man who
+accepted money from the woman weak enough to love him--that, first, he
+would never see me again of his own accord and would reject both my
+entreaties and commands; secondly, that he would petition to be
+transferred to a distant garrison to be out of the path of temptation;
+thirdly, that he would burn my letters.
+
+The Tisch, on her part, promised to tell the King only half the
+truth--not for my sake, of course, but to shield her dear, seduced young
+relative.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIV
+
+FORCED TO DO PENANCE LIKE A TRAPPIST MONK
+
+    "By the King's orders"--I submit for the sake of my children--Must
+    fast as well as pray--In delicate health, I insist upon returning to
+    Dresden--Bernhardt, to avoid being maltreated by King, threatens him
+    with his sword--The King's awful wrath--Bernhardt prisoner in
+    Nossen--I escape, temporarily, protracted _ennui_.
+
+
+    PILLNITZ, _May 28, 1901_.
+
+Though I am in delicate health, the King, having recovered from his
+illness, commanded me to do penance,--almost public penance.
+
+Fast and pray, pray and fast is the order of the day for the next two
+weeks.
+
+I arise every morning at five. At six a closed carriage takes me to a
+distant nunnery of the Ursulines, a good hour's travel. I am forced to
+attend mass, which also lasts an hour. Then a half-hour's sermon,
+dealing with fire and brimstone, hell and damnation.
+
+When that's over the Mother Superior kindly asks me to her cell and
+lectures me for an hour on the duties of a wife and mother, and on the
+terrors that follow in the wake of adultery.
+
+(I wonder where she gets her wisdom. She isn't married, she isn't
+supposed to have children, and she ought to know that the founder of her
+religion was most kind to the adulteress.)
+
+Then back to Pillnitz and breakfast, for it's the King's express command
+that I worship on an empty stomach; some Jesuit told George my sins
+would never be forgiven unless the torture of the fast was added to that
+of early rising, travel, prostration before the altar and listening to
+pious palaver.
+
+I stand it for my children's sake. They will be returned to me after I
+did penance full score. My only satisfaction: I compel the Tisch to
+attend me on my trips, and make her sit on the back seat of the
+carriage. I know this turns her stomach and watch her twitching face
+with devilish glee.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 15, 1901_.
+
+With the authority of the pregnant woman I demanded that I be allowed to
+return to town.
+
+"If compelled to see Prince George and the rest of my enemies daily, my
+child will be mal-formed, or I will suffer an _avortement_," I told the
+King.
+
+They let me go and I am breathing more freely. I still wear the chain
+and ball, but they don't cut into my flesh as in Pillnitz.
+
+Yesterday I learned that Bernhardt was in Dresden, and sent for him. He
+came in company of two army officers who remained in the anteroom.
+
+"I am a prisoner," he said resignedly, "those fellows outside will
+conduct me to Nossen."
+
+The audience granted him several months ago took place only after my
+departure from the summer residence, and developed into a fearful scene.
+
+"His Majesty," said Bernhardt, "was in a rage when I entered. 'State
+what you have to say,' said the King, 'and be brief.'
+
+"'If Your Majesty will graciously permit me to reside in Dresden, I will
+promise to lead a life in accordance with Your Majesty's intentions and
+will obey your slightest wish.'
+
+"'What?' cried the King, 'You dare name conditions for your good
+conduct?'"
+
+Bernhardt denied any intention to impose conditions, but begged to
+submit to His Majesty that he couldn't exist in those small garrisons.
+If in Dresden, it would come easier to him to turn over a new leaf.
+
+"Sure, all you young rakes want to live in the capital," sneered the
+King, "because it's easy in a big town to hide one's delinquencies."
+
+"Your Majesty," cried Bernhardt, "if I ever did a reprehensible thing,
+it was forced upon me by intolerable conditions."
+
+The King grew white with rage.
+
+"No excuses," he thundered. "You are a rip and ugly customer and you
+will stay in the garrison I designated."
+
+Even before the King had finished, Bernhardt interrupted him with a
+fierce: "Don't you call me names, Majesty. I won't stand for that."
+
+"Won't stand for anything that I think proper to mete out to you,
+rascal? I will make you." The King had risen and was about to box
+Bernhardt's ears.
+
+Bernhardt jumped back two paces and shouted like mad: "Don't you dare
+touch me. I will defend my honor sword in hand, even if I have to shoot
+myself on the spot."
+
+For several seconds the King stood speechless, then he reached out his
+hand and touched an electric button. Marshal Count Vitzthum responded.
+
+"Take him," said the King hoarsely--"he is your prisoner."
+
+Bernhardt drew his sword and threw it at the King's feet. He was
+conducted to a room, and sentinels were posted outside his door and
+under his windows. Presently the telephone called together a council of
+war and it was decided that Bernhardt go to Nossen during the King's
+pleasure, or rather displeasure.
+
+"The army officers that act as my guards are not allowed to speak to
+me," said Bernhardt, "and the garrison in Nossen will likewise be
+muzzled." He laughed as he added: "I suppose I shall have to make
+friends with the spirits of the great Augustus's mistresses haunting the
+old burg. They were gay ones! If the King remembered that, he would send
+me to the Trappists rather than to Nossen."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 1, 1901_.
+
+I never dreamt that science would come to my rescue, but a clever woman
+has more than one trick up her sleeve. On a visit to a book store I
+happened to see a new publication on the Hygienics of Pregnancy and had
+it sent to the palace.
+
+Last night, when nearly dead with _ennui_, I turned over the leaves of
+the volume and came across an article advising women in my condition to
+seek plenty of merry company. My mind was made up at once.
+
+First thing in the morning I sent for the Court Physician, and with many
+a sigh and groan gave him to understand that I feared to have melancholy
+if I continued the monotonous life I was leading.
+
+I happened to strike one of the doctor's pet theories, and he recited
+whole pages from the book I had been reading. Then he asked me a hundred
+questions, and rest assured that my answers were in accordance with my
+wishes.
+
+"I will have the honor to report to His Majesty at once," said the
+Councillor at the end of the examination, "that some diversion is
+imperative in Your Imperial Highness's case. Would Your Imperial
+Highness be pleased to visit the theatre or the Opera if the King
+approves?"
+
+The King did approve, and the Crown Princess of Saxony is once more
+permitted the privilege of _Frau_ Schmidt and _Frau_ Mueller; namely, to
+go to the theatre when she feels like it.
+
+[Illustration: THE LATE KING GEORGE OF SAXONY
+
+Louise's Father-in-Law]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LV
+
+FRANCIS JOSEPH JOINS MY SAXON ENEMIES
+
+    Cuts me dead before whole family--Everybody talks over my head at
+    dinner--I refuse to attend more court festivities--Husband protests
+    because I won't stand for insult from Emperor--I give rein to my
+    contempt for his family--Hypocrites, despoilers, gamblers, religious
+    maniacs, brutes--Benign lords to the people, tyrants at home--I cry
+    for my children like a she-dog whose young were drowned.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 2, 1901_.
+
+Great family concourse to look my new baby over, dear Marie Alix, born
+at Wachwitz, September 27.
+
+Emperor Francis Joseph was first to arrive, the Majesty who is forever
+posing as the family's good genius, as upholder of peace and amity among
+his countless cousins and nieces, and the many uncles and aunts and
+other relatives of his grand-children.
+
+Behold how he lived up to this reputation!
+
+I had been commanded to attend the reception in the Queen's _salon_, and
+made my bow to him. He bowed all around, looking at each present, but
+managed to overlook me.
+
+Then he commenced a long and weary conversation with the Queen, at
+whose elbow I sat, and when his stock of platitudes was exhausted,
+turned to fat Mathilde, congratulating her on the possession of the
+_Stern Kreuz_ decoration, an Austrian order which I likewise wore at my
+corsage. It was none other than the late Empress Elizabeth who pinned it
+on me.
+
+Presently dinner was announced. The Emperor took in Her Majesty, the
+King, _nolens, volens_, had to conduct me, but gave me neither word nor
+look. Nor did the others. I couldn't have been more isolated on a desert
+island, than at this royal board.
+
+They talked and cracked their silly jokes, and paid compliments to each
+other and were careful not to let their tongues run away with their
+intriguing minds, but all went above my head. No one spoke to me but the
+lackeys: "If it please Your Imperial Highness----"
+
+Frederick Augustus tore into my bedroom some little time after I had
+retired. Picture of the offended gentleman, if you please. I got no more
+than I deserve, but it "reflected on him, h-i-m, HIM." Though it was a
+"family dinner," he, the Crown Prince of Saxony, was "publicly"
+disgraced. The Emperor had treated the Crown Princess as air. He had not
+deigned to address a single word to her. The Crown Princess was a
+trollop in the Imperial eyes--it was enough to drive the Crown Prince to
+drink.
+
+"Drink yourself to death then," I shrieked.
+
+During the night I speculated what to do: ask a private audience of the
+Emperor, state my side of the case and beg his forgiveness and
+protection, beg, especially, for better treatment at his hands?
+
+And if he refused?
+
+Francis Joseph is a good deal of a Jesuit. When he hates, he never lets
+it come to a break; when he loves, he never attaches himself.
+
+If I stooped to humiliate myself, he might choose to debase me still
+more. It was entirely probable that he would betray my confidences to
+the King and Prince George.
+
+I will defy him and--all of them!
+
+"Her Imperial Highness regrets----" my Court Marshal wrote in answer to
+all invitations or rather "commands" for the next three days. When I
+refused to participate in the "grand leave-taking," Frederick Augustus
+came post-haste to expostulate with me.
+
+"You must. It would be an affront without precedent."
+
+"Take leave of a man who didn't say good-day to me on his arrival, and
+who probably intends to slight me in similar fashion on going away----"
+
+In lieu of argument the Prince Royal abused me like a pick-pocket; I had
+waited for it and now I let loose.
+
+"You are like the rest of your family," I shouted: "ignorant,
+thoughtless, brutal _en venerie_, sanctimonious in dotage. I know few
+people for whom I have so great a detestation as for the Royal Saxons.
+Look at your father, there is no more jesuitical a Jesuit, the inward
+man as hideous as the outward. He would be an insolent lackey, if he
+didn't happen to be a prince.
+
+"And Johann George--a shameless inheritance-chaser, despoiler of
+pupillary funds, gambler at the _bourse_, who whines like a whipped dog
+when he loses.
+
+"The royal Bernhardt, companion of street-walkers!
+
+"Prince Max, who talks theology, but keeps his eye on Therese.
+
+"Your Queen, a victim of religious madness, your King and his
+system--organized selfishness. Chicanery for those dependent upon him,
+ruin for all more gifted than the average Wettiner.
+
+"While living here I have learned to look upon my father's discrowning
+as a stroke of good luck for, since kings can no longer indulge their
+brutalities against their subjects, they turned tyrants at home.
+
+"If your father did to the humblest of his subjects what he did to me,
+he would be chased from home and country. The people, the parliament,
+his own creatures would rise against him and blot his name from the
+royal roster.
+
+"In the palace, in boudoirs, in the nurseries, he plays the
+prince--extortioner--executioner. To the public he is the benign lord,
+whining for paltry huzzas."
+
+Frederick Augustus was so dumfounded, he could only grind his teeth.
+
+I continued: "You prate of respect due the Majesty. There's nothing to
+induce feelings of that sort. Round me there is naught but weakness,
+hypocrisy, pettiness. I see shame and thievery stalking side by side in
+these gilded halls--gilded for show, but pregnant with woe.
+
+"Fie on you, Prince Royal, who allows his wife to be dogged by spies.
+Thieves, paid by your father, steal my souvenirs; a burglar's kit hidden
+in their clothes, they besiege my writing table. Jailers stand between
+me and my children.
+
+"My children!
+
+"Like a she-dog,[7] whose young were drowned, I cry for my babies--I,
+the Crown Princess of Saxony, who saved your family from dying out, a
+degenerate, depraved, demoralized, decadent race."
+
+When I had said this and more I fell down and was seized by crying
+convulsions.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 7: Queens seem to like this unseemly comparison:
+
+"Am I a kennel-dog in the estimation of the Bastard of England?" cried
+Mary of Scots, when Queen Elizabeth refused her safe-conduct through
+England upon her departure from France (Summer 1561).]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVI
+
+I AM DETERMINED TO DO AS I PLEASE
+
+    I reject mother's tearful reproaches--I beard Prince George in his
+    lair despite whining chamberlains--I tell him what I think of him,
+    and he becomes frightened--Threatens madhouse--"I dare you to steal
+    my children"--I win my point--and the children--"Her Imperial
+    Highness regrets"--Lots of forbidden literature--Precautions against
+    intriguing Grand Mistress--The affair with Henry--was it a
+    flower-covered pit to entrap me?--Castle Stolpen and some of its
+    awful history.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 5, 1901_.
+
+Patience ceased to be a virtue. Tolerance would be a crime against
+myself. I am determined to do as I please in future. If it upsets the
+King's, Prince George's and the rest's delicate digestion, so much the
+better.
+
+The newspapers are hinting about my troubles with Prince George and the
+King. When I go driving or appear at the theatre, the public shows its
+sympathy in many ways. Sometimes I am acclaimed to the echo.
+
+Mamma wrote me a tearful letter. She spent six hours in prayers for
+"sinful Louise" and sends me the fruits of her meditations: six pages of
+close script, advising me how to regain the King's and Prince George's
+favor.
+
+Never before have I failed in outward respect to my mother, but this
+time I wrote to her: "Pray attend to your own affairs. Don't meddle in
+mine which you are entirely unable to understand."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 6, 1901_.
+
+Bernhardt was sent to Sonnenstein. Whether he became insane at Nossen,
+or whether it is the family's intention to drive him mad among the
+madmen of Sonnenstein, I don't know, but it behooves me to be careful.
+
+Sonnenstein has accommodation for both sexes.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _November 15, 1901_.
+
+I sent a letter to the King, asking him to have Loschwitz Castle
+prepared for my reception. His Majesty didn't deign to answer, but
+Prince George commanded me in writing to stay at Dresden "under his
+watchful eye."
+
+I immediately proceeded to his apartments in my morning undress, without
+hat, gloves or wrap. As I rushed through the anteroom, Adjutant von
+Metsch begged me with up-lifted hands not to force His Royal Highness's
+door, Prince George being too ill to receive me, etc., etc. I paid no
+attention to his mournful whinings. At that moment I had courage enough
+to stock a regiment.
+
+"So you won't allow me to go to Loschwitz," I addressed George as I
+suddenly bobbed up at the side of his desk.
+
+My father-in-law looked at me as if I were a spook, emerged from a
+locked closet.
+
+"Who let you in?" he managed to say after a while.
+
+"I didn't come here to answer questions," I replied. "I came to announce
+that if you don't let me go to Loschwitz, there will be a scandal that
+will resound all over Christendom and make you impossible in your own
+capital."
+
+"Why do you want to leave Dresden?" he insisted.
+
+"Because I want to be alone. Because I am tired of hateful faces.
+Because I refuse to accept orders and insults from people that are
+beneath an Imperial Princess of Austria."
+
+Prince George turned pale.
+
+"Am I one of those beneath Your Imperial Highness?" he queried stupidly.
+
+"Decidedly so."
+
+A long pause. Then Prince George shouted: "To the devil with you. I
+don't care whether you stay in Loschwitz, or Dresden, or on the
+Vogelwiese."
+
+The Vogelwiese is an amusement park, respectable enough, but the word or
+name, as used by George, reeked with sinister and insulting meaning.
+
+Trembling with rage, I replied: "Right royal language you royal Saxons
+use. From time to time, I suppose, you refresh your fish-wife
+vocabulary in the annals of Augustus the Physical Strong, than whom a
+more gross word-slinger did not walk the history of the eighteenth
+century."
+
+I believe Prince George was frightened by my violence. Assuming a
+haughty tone he said formally: "Your Imperial Highness is at liberty to
+travel whenever you please, but you will be so good as to leave your
+children in Dresden."
+
+I stepped up to the white-livered coward and hissed in his face: "Steal
+my children if you dare, and I will go to France, or Switzerland and ask
+a republican President to interfere for humanity's sake."
+
+"And--land yourself in an insane asylum," sneered George.
+
+"An old trick of the Royal House of Saxony, I know," I shouted back.
+"Bernhardt is saner than you, yet the King sent him to Sonnenstein. If
+such a crime had been perpetrated by one not a king, he would go to
+jail."
+
+Prince George pointed a trembling finger towards the door. "Out with
+you!" he bawled hoarsely. "Out!"
+
+I stood my ground. "May I take my children? Yes or no?"
+
+He rang the bell and repeated mechanically: "Out with you, out!"
+
+I had another fit of crying convulsions. Doctors, maids and lackeys were
+summoned in numbers. They bedded me on the couch and six men-servants
+carried me to my apartments.
+
+Two days later I went to Loschwitz with my children.
+
+I had defied the King. Prince George was humbled. I carried my point,
+and the Dresden court will not see me again in a hurry.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _Christmas, 1901_.
+
+I refused to spend Christmas at Court. Frederick Augustus planned a stay
+of a couple of weeks. "Not a single night," I wrote back.
+
+They parleyed; they begged. "The Crown Prince desires to spend Christmas
+with the children. In the interests of public opinion, it's absolutely
+necessary that he does."
+
+"But not--that I submit to prostitution. I will give him a dinner, but
+he will drive back to Dresden immediately afterwards."
+
+Frederick Augustus brought numerous presents for me. "You may place them
+under the Christmas tree," I ordered the Tisch.
+
+"Oh, Your Imperial Highness, look," cried the Tisch, holding up
+something or other.
+
+I turned my back on her and looked out of the window. I never went near
+my end of the Christmas table. "You will send the things brought by His
+Royal Highness to the bazaar for crippled children," I told the House
+Marshal. "They shall be sold for the benefit of the poor."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _January 1, 1902_.
+
+"Her Imperial Highness regrets."
+
+I refused the invitations to today's family dinner; the grand reception,
+_Te Deum_ and parade. "Unprecedented affront!" What do I care!
+
+I have eighteen horses, half-a-dozen carriages, I drive, I ride, I hunt,
+I give the Tisch palpitation daily by the literature I affect: _Zola_,
+_Flaubert_, _M'lle Paul_, _Ma Femme_, _M'lle de Maupin_, _Casanova_,
+_M'me Bovary_. And the periodicals I subscribed for! _Simplicissimus_,
+Harden's _Zukunft_, all the _double entendre_ weeklies and monthlies of
+Paris. May Prince George and Mathilde burst with rage and envy when they
+hear of my excursions in the realms of the literary Satans.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _January 15, 1902_.
+
+The Tisch is beginning to treat me like a person irresponsible for her
+doings. Sonnenstein is looming up anew. But I am going to fool her. As I
+will hold no more speech with her, there will be no occasion for turning
+my own words against me.
+
+If I have to give a command, or answer a question, I ask Lucretia or
+_Fraeulein_ von Schoenberg to convey my orders.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _March 20, 1902_.
+
+An uneventful winter is drawing to a close. By banishing myself to this
+quiet place I raised a barrier against quarrels, against harsh orders,
+against humiliations. And the barrier also shuts out: love, happiness.
+
+Sometimes, when the Tisch's hateful mouth spouts honeyed platitudes, I
+ask myself whether the affair with Henry wasn't, after all, a
+flower-covered pit dug for me by my enemies.
+
+It was the Tisch who had Henry appointed _Vortaenzer_.
+
+Maybe, knowing my inflammable heart, she offered the tempting bait
+solely to the end of getting me into her power?
+
+Far from impossible.
+
+I curse the day when I entered Dresden, joined this court and family.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    LOSCHWITZ, _May 15, 1902_.
+
+Royal command to join the court at Pillnitz June 1. The King, who has
+been ailing for some time, is anxious to be reunited with the children,
+and, as a necessary evil, I must go along.
+
+I replied that I would prefer Nossen, or even Stolpen, if it pleases His
+Majesty.
+
+Castle Stolpen is an old-time stronghold of the bishops of Meissen, and
+its very ruins are pregnant with reminiscences of a barbaric age. The
+apartments once occupied by the Countess Cosel, as a prison first, as a
+residence after the death of Augustus, might be made habitable even now.
+Exceedingly interesting are the old-time torture chambers and the
+subterranean living rooms of the "sworn torturer" and the dogs,
+man-shaped, that served him.
+
+Sanct. Donatus Tower, a wing of the great, black pile, was the ancient
+_habitat_ of these worthies, and the torture chamber, still extant, is a
+hall almost as big as the Dresden throne-room. In an inscription hewn in
+the basalt, the sovereign bishop, Johannes VI, poses as builder and
+seems proud of the damnable fact. Other princes of the Church let us
+know in high-sounding Latin script that they created the "Monk hole" and
+the "stairless prison" respectively.
+
+The latter is a vast subterranean vault, never reached by sunshine or
+light of any kind. Its victims were made to descend some twenty feet
+below the surface of the earth on a ladder. When near the bottom, the
+ladder was pulled up and--stayed up. The prisoners were fed once every
+twenty-four hours, when a leather water pouch and some pounds of black
+bread were sent down on a rope.
+
+Of course only the strongest got a morsel, or a drink of water. The
+others died of starvation and the survivors lived only until there were
+new arrivals, stronger than themselves. The dead bodies were never
+removed, and horrible stories of necrophily smudge the records of this
+awful prison and cover its princely keepers with infamy.
+
+The "Monk's hole" was called officially "Obey Your Judge." It is a sort
+of chimney, just large enough to take the body of a man.
+
+When a monk or other prisoner refused to confess, he was let down into
+the hole in the wall to starve, while tempting dishes, meat, wine and
+bread, were dangled over his head, almost within reach of his hands.
+
+Of course, after enduring this torture for several days, the delinquent
+was glad enough to "Obey His Judge."
+
+By offering to go to this abode of horror and to take the place of
+Cosel, I meant to show my utter contempt for the royal favor
+vouchsafed.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVII
+
+I CONFESS TO PAPA
+
+    King Albert dies and King George a very sick man--Papa's good
+    advice--"You will be Queen soon"--A lovely old man, very much
+    troubled.
+
+
+    CASTLE SIBYLLENORT, _June 19, 1902_.
+
+King Albert is dead. George is King, and may God have mercy upon my
+soul.
+
+Of course the demise of His Majesty changed all my plans of defiance and
+otherwise. I am once more an official person, even an important one, for
+the new King can't last long. He is a very sick man, in fact. Perhaps
+that is the reason why he wants to hear himself addressed "Your Majesty"
+all the time. Petty souls like to be called "great."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 21, 1902_.
+
+I intended to return at once to Loschwitz, but the King, hearing of my
+intention and not wishing to provoke another scene, invited my father to
+come to Dresden "in the interests of his daughter."
+
+The same evening I received a wire from papa, saying that he would be in
+Dresden within twenty-four hours.
+
+My own arrival in the capital was kept secret by the King's order, but
+next afternoon, when I drove to the station to welcome my father, I got
+my reception just the same. The people wildly cheered their Crown
+Princess and thousands of sympathizing eyes followed me from the palace
+to the depot.
+
+I was almost overcome by so much sympathy and when at last I saw father,
+I threw myself on his neck, crying aloud.
+
+The King was standing by, impatiently waiting to conduct his grand-ducal
+guest before the guard of honor had drawn up. "Later, later," whispered
+papa, patting me on the cheek.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _June 22, 1902_.
+
+I had an hour's talk with father. I bared my heart to him. I reported my
+own faults along with those of the others.
+
+Papa understands me. He sympathizes with me, but help me he cannot.
+
+"These are only passing shadows," he said. "Look boldly into the future.
+You will soon be Queen."
+
+And he told me of his financial difficulties and of the misfortune of
+being a sovereign lord without either land or money.
+
+"The Emperor ordered me to scold you hard," he continued, "and mamma
+wants me to be very severe. As to King George, he said he would thank
+God if I succeeded in breaking your rebellious spirit. 'If you don't, I
+will,' added his Majesty."
+
+Then father kissed me more lovingly than ever and asked, half
+apologetically: "Is it true, Louise, that you had a lover?"
+
+"I thought I had one, but he was unworthy of me," I replied without
+shame.
+
+My confession seemed to frighten him.
+
+"It's sad, sad," he said. "Royal blood is dangerous juice. It brought
+Mary of Scots to the scaffold; it caused your great-aunt Marie
+Antoinette to lose her head, only to save the old monarchies a few years
+later, when we inveigled the enemy of legitimate kingship into a
+marriage with another of your relatives. But for Marie, Louise, the
+descendants of the Corsican might still sit on a dozen thrones."
+
+Father forgot his daughter's disgrace when he mounted this historic
+hobby-horse and, needless to say, I did not recall the original text.
+
+Only when, three days later, he took leave of me, holding my head long
+between his two trembling hands and kissing me again and again, I felt
+that the poor, old man's heart was oppressed with shame and torn by
+fears.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVIII
+
+MONSIEUR GIRON--RICHARD, THE ARTIST
+
+    The King asks me to superintend lessons by M. Giron--A most
+    fascinating man--His Grecian eyes--He is a painter as well as a
+    teacher--In love--Careless whether I am caught in my lover's
+    arms--"Richard" talks anarchy to me--Why I don't believe in woman
+    suffrage--Characters and doings of women in power.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 1, 1902_.
+
+King George is determined I shall stay in Dresden to end the newspaper
+talk about trouble in the bosom of the royal family.
+
+He engaged a new head-tutor for my little brood. Monsieur Giron, a
+Belgian of good family.
+
+"I would be pleased if you attended the children's lessons and reported
+to me on the method of the new man," he said. "You are so intellectual,
+Louise, you will find out quickly if M. Giron is not what he is
+represented to be."
+
+I promised, for, after all, I owed so much to the King and my children.
+
+Alas, it was fate!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 1, After Midnight_.
+
+He is tall, well made, and his wild, Grecian eyes fascinate me. He is
+conscious of self, but modest. His voice is sweet and sonorous, his eyes
+are bright with intellect. Speaking eyes!
+
+I asked him to visit my apartments at the conclusion of school hours. He
+told me he was a painter as well as a teacher of languages.
+
+"Would you like to paint me?"
+
+"I am dying for a chance to reproduce your loveliness as far as my poor
+art permits."
+
+He told me he had a studio in town, where he is known under his artist's
+_pseudonyme_, Richard.
+
+"How romantic! I'd like to see it," I said impulsively.
+
+"Several ladies and gentlemen of society sat for portraits at my studio
+here and at home."
+
+In short we arranged that he paint my picture and that I should go to
+his studio, where the light is excellent.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _July 15, 1902_.
+
+I am happy once more. Those hours at Richard's studio are the sweetest
+of my life.
+
+Lucretia acts the protecting angel as usual. Richard calls her Justice
+because she is "blind." When she is along, I drive boldly up to the
+door in one of the court carriages. Sometimes, when I can sneak out of
+the palace for a little while unobserved, I go alone in a cab.
+
+How long this sort of thing can go on without discovery, I know not. As
+to what will happen afterwards, I care not.
+
+If I was told that tomorrow I would be caught in my lover's arms and
+banished to a lone island for life, I would go to his studio just the
+same.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _August 1, 1902_.
+
+Richard is moulding my character. I, once so proud of rank and station,
+I, who upheld the Wettiners' robbery of a poor, defenseless woman, the
+Duke's wife, because Socialistic papers spoke in her favor,--Louise now
+allows anarchistic tendencies to be poured in her ears. She almost
+applauds them.
+
+This easy change from one extreme to the other at a lover's behest is
+one of the things that make woman's rule--or co-rule--as the male's
+political equal--impossible. It's a sort of _Phallus_ worship that
+always was and always will be.
+
+"Though women have not unfrequently been the holders of temporary and
+precarious power, there are not many instances where they have held
+secure and absolute dominion," says Dr. William W. Ireland in his
+famous "Blot upon the Brain."
+
+Because they were swayed by the male of the species, of course!
+
+Though the characters of the world's female sovereigns differed as to
+blood, race, education, environment and personal traits, neither showed
+any inclination to resist the allurements of irregular _amours_.
+
+Think of Semiramis, of Mary of Scots, of Elizabeth, Catherine I, of the
+Tsaritzas Elizabeth and the second Catherine--under the temptations of
+Power, they recruited paramours for themselves in all ranks of society.
+
+Agrippina was more licentious than Caligula; Messalina's infamy
+surpassed Nero's, and the furthest reaching, the one irresistible Power
+swaying them all was MAN.
+
+Augustus of the three hundred and fifty-four emphasized this in the
+negative and, in his own uncouth way, by "postering" the Countess
+Cosel's chief charm on penny coins.
+
+"She cost Saxony twenty millions in gold--behold the penny's worth she
+gave in return."
+
+When the beauty who had brought the richest German kingdom to the verge
+of state bankruptcy died February 2, 1765, four hundred of Augustus's
+infamous medals were found hidden in her favorite armchair. She paid
+three or four times their weight in gold for each.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIX
+
+THE PEOPLE THINK ME A WANTON
+
+    Credit me with innumerable lovers, but don't disapprove--Glad the
+    King feels scandalized--Picture of the "she-monster"--Everybody
+    eager for love--I delight in Richard's jealousy--Husband's
+    indelicate announcement at table--I rush from the royal opera to see
+    my lover--A threatening dream--Richard not mercenary like my noble
+    lovers.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _August 10, 1902_.
+
+This is the kind of speech Richard holds with me and--I enjoy:
+
+"Every working-girl, every poor woman who suckles her own children and
+helps her husband in the fight for existence, stands mountain high above
+royal ladies like you.
+
+"None of you royal ladies are their moral equals.
+
+"In no distant time," he says, "they will chase you from your thrones,
+even as your relatives had to evacuate France by tumbril, post-chaise or
+train."
+
+Richard's ethical and intellectual valuation of royal princes coincides
+with my own. He has rare insight into our family life.
+
+However, these disclosures both amazed and alarmed me when I first
+heard them pronounced. I never dreamt that opinions of that kind
+prevailed among the masses.
+
+"But why am I acclaimed whenever I show myself?"
+
+"Because you are pretty, because you impersonate the one thing all are
+desirous to embrace: affluence, kindness, youth and beauty. Because you
+are a treat to the senses and because sensuality is the paramount thing
+in life, whether we admit it or not."
+
+"Who's 'we'?"
+
+"Kings and anarchists, princesses of the Blood and laundresses, royal
+princes and cab drivers, empresses, street-walkers, society ladies,
+big-wigs and _sabretasches_. The draggled Menads and the helpful
+Lafayette, the Jacobins, Charlotte Corday and the man she killed--all
+were, and are, on similar pleasure bent."
+
+And he added quickly: "As to the Dresdeners, they are tickled because,
+every time they applaud you, the King is scandalized."
+
+"How do they know that I am not on good terms with the King?"
+
+"The very children in arms understand."
+
+All Dresden, says Richard, is talking about me. Everybody assumes to
+know the number and qualities of my lovers. "Louise," they argue, "knows
+how to enjoy herself, but, though it serves the King right, we wouldn't
+have her for a daughter-in-law, either."
+
+According to the masses, I visit the Vogelwiese at night, ride on the
+flying horses and solicit men and boys that please my fancy. Like a
+gigantic she-monster, I drag them to my lair--"some to vanish forever."
+(No doubt, I eat them.)
+
+"Unwashed soldiers and clerks reeking with cheap perfume, actors and
+students, draymen and generals, it's all the same to the Crown Princess.
+
+"Sometimes, when the spirit moves her, the Crown Princess issues from
+her gilded apartments in the palace and seizes the sentinel patrolling
+the corridors. Or she visits the guard-room _en deshabille_ and selects
+the youngest and best looking officer for her prey.
+
+"Generous, too. She thinks nothing of handing a pension of ten thousand
+marks per year to a chap that pleased her once."
+
+"Is that all they say about me?"
+
+"Not one-half. Poor devils that can't afford ten marks per year for
+their fun, Cit's wives that know only their ill-kempt husbands, factory
+girls that sell their virtue for a supper or a glass of beer--though
+afterwards they claim it was champagne--all take delight in
+contemplating that you, or any other good looking royal woman, are
+Frankenstein's succuba or worse. Didn't they accuse your grand-aunt,
+Marie Antoinette, of incest with her son and gave him to the cobbler to
+thrash the immorality out of him?"
+
+"And they give names?"
+
+"Strings of them"--among them several I never heard mentioned before.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _August 15, 1902_.
+
+Richard is jealous--jealous of the men I did love and the regiments that
+public opinion give me credit for. He must needs think I have loins of
+steel.
+
+He tells me he suffers agonies by what I confessed, and still more by
+what I hide. To see him thus unhappy gives me intense pleasure, for it
+shows that the boy loves me to distraction.
+
+    _Midnight._
+
+M. Giron was very cold and distant during the afternoon's lessons.
+
+I had previously lunched with him at his studio and we were very gay
+then. I teased him unmercifully about "his royal _demi-mondaine_," as
+the masses painted me.
+
+Frederick Augustus was very gallant at dinner and told me, before a
+table full of people, that he would take pleasure in sleeping with me
+tonight. I have too bad a conscience to deny myself to him. But I ran
+over to the opera for half an hour and ordered M. Giron to my box.
+
+"I got over my vexation," he said,--"got over it because I reflected
+that you are the Princess Royal and that I would be a fool to take your
+love seriously. Henceforth I will regard it a passing adventure and let
+it go at that, for if I thought it the great passion of my life, I would
+despair, indeed."
+
+"Find a closed cab," I whispered, my heart in my mouth; "I must see you
+alone. I will be at the northern side-exit in five minutes."
+
+Cabby was ordered to drive slowly along unfrequented side streets. We
+lowered the curtains.
+
+"So you don't love me?" I wailed. Burying my face on Richard's chest I
+cried as if my heart would break.
+
+"Not love you?" he breathed. "If I loved you not, I would die, Louise."
+
+"Then why those cruel words?"
+
+"Good heavens," he cried, "haven't I the right to be jealous? I said
+what I said to hear you say that you love me."
+
+"And you will always love me?"
+
+"Always, dearest," and he covered my face and neck with burning kisses.
+
+Ten minutes later I was again seated at the opera.
+
+I hear Frederick Augustus in the corridor.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _August 16, 1902_.
+
+A horrible night. Lucky that Frederick Augustus was more than half drunk
+when he sought "His Imperial Pleasure-trove," as he likes to call me,
+for I often talk in my sleep and--I dreamt of Richard. I dreamt of my
+enemies, too.
+
+They stole him from me. He was of the past like Henry, Romano and the
+rest.
+
+In a second dream he jilted me--cast me off like a garment, old or out
+of fashion.
+
+Lucretia, who sleeps in the next room, heard me cry out in terror, heard
+me denounce the King, Tisch--everybody.
+
+And Frederick Augustus snored.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _October 1, 1902_.
+
+Princes and noblemen have ever sought their own advantage of me. To them
+I was always the milch-cow, or Phryne, outright.
+
+Richard is poor. I offered him a considerable sum for one of his
+paintings.
+
+"Never again mention the matter," he said curtly.
+
+"But it would give me much pleasure to be of assistance to you."
+
+"Louise, we must separate if you don't stop that line of talk," he
+replied.
+
+And he means it.
+
+A day or two later I let fall, casually, that Frederick Augustus might
+buy the portrait of myself that was nearing completion under his
+skillful brush.
+
+"His Royal Highness won't have the chance," he cried fiercely. "I will
+tell him it isn't finished, or doesn't come up to my artistic standard,
+or something of the sort."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LX
+
+THE DAY OF JUDGMENT LOOMS UP
+
+    My Grand Mistress shows her colors--Richard advises flight--I
+    hesitate on account of my children--My Grand Mistress steals a
+    letter from Richard to me--I opine that an adulteress's word is as
+    good as a thief's--I humble my Grand Mistress, but it won't do me
+    much good--Pleasant hours at his studio.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _October 15, 1902_.
+
+That dreadful dream is becoming a heart-breaking reality.
+
+The Tisch entered my boudoir last night in her mantilla, emblem of her
+office as Grand Mistress.
+
+Some dirty business on hand, I surmised at once.
+
+"Imperial Highness," she said, genuflexing ceremoniously, "I submit that
+your artist takes too long about the portrait. Your Imperial Highness's
+visits to the studio must cease."
+
+"Since when do you give orders here, Baroness?"
+
+"His Majesty empowered me," answered the Grand Dame.
+
+"In that case, do as you like, but don't bother me," I cried bravely
+enough, but trembling in every limb. The Tisch, no doubt, is preparing
+to deal me another blow.
+
+When I told Richard that henceforth we would have to exercise extra
+care, he was beside himself with rage.
+
+"Why stand such tyranny?" he cried. "No self-respecting woman, other
+than royal, would submit for a single week to be bullied and intrigued
+against and threatened and browbeaten as you are, and they have ill-used
+you for eleven years. If you were a simple Cit's daughter, instead of
+the descendant of a decrepit, bloodless family, yclept royal, you would
+make an end now, leave them to their shabby kingship and be a free
+woman--free and happy."
+
+My lover forgets the children, but the picture of the free life he draws
+is most attractive.
+
+"And would you go with me to the end of the earth, as the story books
+put it?" I asked tremblingly.
+
+"Louise," he answered, "if you are brave enough and strong enough to
+throw away a crown, I will be your slave for life."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _October 20, 1902_.
+
+"Your Imperial Highness was pleased to call me a thief once," said the
+Tisch early this morning as she entered my boudoir, triumph written all
+over her yellow countenance. "You repeated that calumny to the Prince
+Royal and doubtless to many other persons. Today came the opportunity
+to live up to my reputation. I stole a letter addressed to you by your
+present lover, and as Your Imperial Highness is pleased to doubt my
+authority, immediately sent it to His Majesty. It makes highly
+interesting reading."
+
+The blow made my knees tremble, but pain and rage came to my assistance,
+effacing the momentary weakness.
+
+"Don't think for a moment to frighten me," I cried. "I say to your face
+that I have a lover--a gentleman, not an unspeakable, like your nephew.
+And now listen: I will tell the King and the press of Europe, if it must
+be, that it was you, my Grand Mistress, who 'pandered' me to
+Henry--for--revenue. I will have him whipped out of the army----"
+
+"You don't suppose for a moment that the word of an adulteress would
+prove acceptable either to His Majesty or anyone else?" hissed the
+insolent creature.
+
+"My word will be accepted all around," I shouted back, "for I have the
+proofs, proofs that you smuggled this unspeakable into my household,
+proofs that you lied to the King in order not to disrupt your nephew's
+career.
+
+"And I will cry from the house-tops that you discovered my relations
+with Henry only _after_ I had paid his debts, _after_ I had financed his
+excursions to gambling-houses and to usurers' dens. Ah, I paid his
+tailors and glove-makers, his board and lodging, his laundry bills. I
+paid the alimony due his strumpets, and _after_ all was done, _after_
+his lieutenantship had again a clean bill of health, financially
+speaking, then, and not a moment before, did you step in and make an end
+of the farce, wherein I played the part of 'angel,' or pay-master."
+
+The Tisch got visibly smaller under my lash. The air of triumph she bore
+when entering the room gave way to an expression of despair. If she
+hadn't sent the letter to the King, I believe she would have given it up
+after I was half through with her.
+
+Once more I hold the whip hand, but what good will it do me since I am
+condemned to lose the man I love?
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _Midnight._
+
+Richard approved of all I said and did. We were unspeakably happy this
+afternoon, despite the storm threatening us.
+
+I fear neither the King nor Frederick Augustus now, but the fear of
+Sonnenstein I can't shake off.
+
+If the King takes it upon himself to say that I'm mad, there will be
+plenty of medical authorities to bear him out, none to oppose him.
+
+Of course, they will separate me from my children and will do their
+utmost to drive me mad between now and the time when I should be
+proclaimed Queen.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXI
+
+A MAD HOUSE FOR LOUISE--PROBABLY
+
+    My confidential maid, Lucretia, is banished--The new King has got
+    the incriminating letter, but Frederick Augustus says nothing--On
+    the eve of judgment the King falls ill.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _October 21, 1902_.
+
+This morning, at six, Lucretia rushed into my room. She was in her
+night-gown. Her hair was loose. No color in her face.
+
+And between sobs and curses she told me that she had orders to leave by
+ten sharp. "If you dare stay over the appointed time, you will be
+transported to the frontier on foot, between gendarmes."
+
+"Von Baumann shall come."
+
+I threw a loose wrapper over my night-gown and received him at once.
+
+"My marriage contract provides that no one but I have the right of
+dismissal with respect to Countess Baranello," I said sharply.
+
+"As long as the lady keeps within the law," replied Baumann with just a
+trace of insolence in his voice.
+
+I looked at him in astonishment.
+
+"The Countess is guilty of a crime, of a succession of crimes,"
+continued Baumann, "but His Majesty, not wishing to be harsh, decided to
+treat her merely as an obnoxious foreigner. She has forfeited her right
+to live in Saxony, and will do well to obey."
+
+I helped poor Lucretia pack. I gave her a handful of jewels, I paid her
+a year's salary in advance and ordered the treasury to procure
+first-class passage for her to Rome.
+
+I sent her to the station in my own carriage, and wired to our Rome
+representative to show her every courtesy.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _Afternoon._
+
+Frederick Augustus hasn't said a word to me about the affair with
+Richard. We have our meals together and his attitude in no wise differs
+from that usually maintained. Yet I am convinced he knows.
+
+The last service rendered me by Lucretia, gave me great relief. She
+found out that neither the Tisch, nor Frederick Augustus, nor the King
+know who "Richard" is. Fortunately his letter was typewritten, signature
+and all.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _Six o'clock._
+
+The King announced his visit for eight o'clock.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _Nine o'clock._
+
+The King had a fall in his apartments shortly after he sent me notice of
+his coming. He was unconscious for two hours.
+
+Safe for the time being!
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXII
+
+KING'S ILLNESS A BOON TO LOVERS
+
+    Prayers mixed with joy--Espionage disorganized, and I can do as I
+    please--Love-making in the school-room--Buying a ring for
+    Richard--"Wishing it on"--"Our marriage"--King's life despaired
+    of--My tormentors obsequious--Smile at my peccadilloes--Husband
+    proud of me--My popularity a great asset--Frederick Augustus
+    delighted when he hears that King can't last long--The joyous
+    luncheon at Richard's studio--Making fun of majesties--I expect to
+    be Queen presently.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _October 22, 1902_.
+
+He is dangerously ill. It may be weeks and months before the King
+recovers--if he recovers at all.
+
+I feel like praying, crying, shouting with joy.
+
+When Richard folded his arms about me this afternoon, I said to myself:
+"God doesn't begrudge me a lover as kind and good as Richard."
+
+The King's illness has disorganized the espionage, my coming and going
+are no longer controlled. The body-groom brings in my letters as
+delivered at the gate.
+
+In the school room, while the children are writing or studying, Richard
+and I find time to exchange kind words and even an occasional caress.
+When I "command" the tutor to my apartments, we need fear no surprise.
+
+The utmost quiet prevails in the palace. The courtyard is sanded foot
+high and strewn with straw to deaden the sound of wheels and horses'
+hoofs. No more mounting of the guard with fife and drum.
+
+I suggested that the children be sent to the _Grosser Garten_ to play.
+The Tisch agreed with enthusiasm. This yields us--Richard and
+myself--two hours of love-making.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _October 25, 1902_.
+
+The King continues ill.
+
+I went into a cheap jeweler's this afternoon and bought an inexpensive
+ring with a ruby no larger than a pin head. When I gave it to Richard,
+he grew red with joy.
+
+Strange, he bought a similar ring for me. I shall never wear another
+ring in my life but Richard's. I pulled my rings off one after the other
+and threw them on the bed.
+
+I kissed the larger ring and "wished" it on Richard's finger. He did the
+same with the ring intended for me. And we said, as with a common
+breath, "Our wedding."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 1, 1902_.
+
+A bulletin, by the King's physicians, holds out scant hopes for George's
+life.
+
+I am watching the palace yard. The Archbishop of Dresden, attended by
+two court chaplains and a host of other clerics, is just mounting the
+stairs to administer the last rites of the Church. The next minute may
+see me Queen of Saxony. I may even be Queen now. I wish I had the
+effrontery to promise the lackey or official, announcing my
+enthronization, a handful of gold, as George did, when King Albert was
+dying.
+
+Even so, I have risen immeasurably in everybody's esteem. The sweet
+family knows me again. Johann George, Mathilde, Isabelle and Max are
+kotowing to me. Bernhardt sent me a telegram of condolence--condolence!
+He is a humorist, that boy.
+
+Minister of the Royal House, Baron Seydwitz, called twice. The Royal
+Adjutant, General von Carlowitz, spoke of the possibility of giving
+Bernhardt a command in Dresden. Von Baumann says it was the President of
+the Police who insisted upon Lucretia's hasty departure. If he, Baumann,
+had his way, my maid of honor would have got off with a warning.
+
+And you should see the Tisch. She must have spent a month's salary on
+flowers for me, which I promptly sent to the nearest pauper hospital.
+She smiles, she nearly breaks her back genuflexing. Her every second
+word is "most submissive," "will the Imperial Highness deign to do
+this," that, or the other thing.
+
+The terror got into her old bones and she trembles for her pension,
+for, of course, she knows that instant dismissal will be her portion.
+
+Frederick Augustus talks of having some more princes and--acts
+accordingly. Perish the thought that his Louise is an adulteress, that
+she ever had a lover, has one now!
+
+He is haunting my room, running from door to window, from window to
+door. Every little while he opens the _portieres_ to see if no one's
+coming to address him "Your Majesty."
+
+"Your popularity with the public is a great asset," he says over and
+over again. "Lucky devil I, to have a wife as smart as you."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 2, 1902_.
+
+Frederick Augustus came running into my room and gave me a bear-hug.
+
+"The doctors say the King is lost. Impossible to keep him alive any
+longer."
+
+He rushed out.
+
+I am Queen.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _After Lunch._
+
+Just back from Richard's studio. We had lunch together. We laughed, we
+danced, we sang. We bombarded one another with pillows.
+
+We acted the jubilant heirs. I recalled Sybillenort at the time King
+Albert died. In Saxony, when man or woman shuffles off this mortal coil,
+there's always a good "feed" at the corpse's expense. At the late King's
+castle a "mourning breakfast" was served upon the royal family's arrival
+from Dresden--a most magnificent repast in the matter of plate and
+victuals offered, but each had to serve himself or herself, as servants
+were dispensed with.
+
+This by the new King's special orders--that he might hear himself
+addressed "Your Majesty" by his kith and kin, a formality usually
+neglected in the family circle except when two or more of the big-wigs
+are warring against each other.
+
+"Will Your Majesty have one or two lumps of sugar?"
+
+"May it please Your Majesty--some steak?"
+
+"I hope Your Majesty will allow me to peel an orange for Your Majesty."
+
+Thus at Sybillenort. And at Richard's:
+
+"Will Your Greatness (Majesty) deign to take Your Greatness's feather
+out of my eye?"
+
+Or: "May it never please Your Transparency (_Durchlaucht_, German for
+Highness) to let _His_ Greatness see through you."
+
+I am several times a Countess besides a Princess, Duchess, etc., and
+Richard continued with his paraphrasing of titles:
+
+"Your Illuminatedness[8] makes lights quite unnecessary," and he
+switched them off in a room already darkened by blinds and shades and
+curtains.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 8: "Illuminated" is the proper title for German counts of the
+higher class.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXIII
+
+WHAT I WILL DO WHEN I AM QUEEN
+
+    A foretaste: titled servants put me _en route_ for lover--The
+    bargain I will propose to Frederick Augustus--Frederick Augustus
+    will be a complaisant King--To revive _Petit Trianon_--I am
+    addressed as Queen.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 3, 1902_.
+
+Though still styled Crown Princess, I am already revelling in the
+delights and perquisites of queenship: I do as I please, go where I
+please, I would think aloud, as I please, if anyone dared me.
+
+For all my enemies of a week ago turned flatterers and flunkeys, bowing,
+grovelling, fawning, contemptible in their self-abasement, but quite
+useful to my purposes.
+
+Like most royal palaces, ours at Dresden has a secret staircase and exit
+for emergencies. It is never used by ladies; only the princes have
+recourse to it, occasionally, to drop out of sight in _mufti_, for, of
+course, royal incognito is more or less legitimate.
+
+    "In the evening, after our card party was over, Catherine was seen
+    to dismiss her court and retire to her private apartments with the
+    new favorite," say the Secret Memoirs of the Court of St.
+    Petersburg.
+
+Less publicly, perhaps, but even more illegitimately, I walk the secret
+staircase _en route_ for my lover whenever I please nowadays.
+
+I go veiled and--make the Grand Mistress open the door for me. She knows
+that I am on sweet pleasure bent and--smiles.
+
+"When will Your Imperial Highness deign to return?"
+
+I name the hour and she is there to receive me--smirking, blind, deaf
+and dumb.
+
+A foretaste of my queenship paradise! No one will boss me, no one will
+dare talk about me, everything I do will be good, even sublime.
+
+I made up my mind as to Frederick Augustus.
+
+"Frederick Augustus," I will say to him, "now that we are King and
+Queen, let's enjoy to the full the thing's emoluments; otherwise, what's
+the use? You will allow me to go my way and I will certainly shut both
+eyes as to your doings, even if you follow in the footsteps of your
+namesake of the three-hundred-and-fifty-two."
+
+Of course, I will say it differently, but my husband will understand.
+The main thing: the royal family and court must stop hurling at me the
+long, watery _haussez les mains_ of narrow-minded, provincial
+inquisitiveness, which both oppresses and goads me.
+
+Frederick Augustus has too much respect for the kingly dignity to impugn
+his partner, the Queen.
+
+Will I revive, then, the seraglios of the Russian Anns and Elizabeths,
+or start a new _Parc aux Cerfs_ with strong men and Marathon winners for
+inmates? Thank you, a miniature _Petit Trianon_ will be good enough for
+me.
+
+The Tisch entered a minute ago and respectfully remains at the door,
+though she sees I am engaged on my Diary. I watch her in the mirror. She
+would travel bare-foot to Kevlaar, of which Heinrich Heine sung, for a
+glimpse of what I wrote. Her variegated grimaces give her the appearance
+of a carved wooden devil, sprinkled with holy water.
+
+At last I deign to inquire: "What is it, Baroness?"
+
+"The Crown Prince wants to see Your Imperial Highness. May he come in?"
+
+"Since when does my husband send you to announce him?"
+
+"Pardon, Your Imperial Highness, I meant Prince George."
+
+Designating my first-born Prince Royal, means recognizing me as Queen.
+
+And, but ten days ago, this same viper refused to address me by my
+_proper_ title.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXIV
+
+THE KING IS ALIVE AND PUNISHMENT NEAR
+
+    My queenship postponed--King George publicly acclaimed--Cuts me dead
+    in church--Frederick Augustus's disappointment--Terrible power of a
+    king over his family, and no appeal--I am like the nude witch of
+    old.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 10, 1902_.
+
+The King has taken nourishment. The King will not die--he will live and
+punish me. Still, I must not complain. I had a respite and Richard says,
+"when one rises from the dead, one is less inclined to be severe with
+the living." But he grew rather despondent immediately.
+
+"_La liberte est une garce, qui ne se laisse monter que sur des matelas
+des cadavres humains!_" he quoted _Comte_ Mirabeau. Our corpse was
+alive, our liberty is dead for the time being.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 15, 1902_.
+
+The King went driving this morning and I am told that he came home well
+pleased, for there was lusty cheering along the line. Frederick Augustus
+hasn't mentioned my affair at all. Disappointment made him rather gloomy
+and he begins to treat me again in the right royal Saxon fashion: I am
+air for His Highness.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _After Supper._
+
+The family will wait upon His Majesty in a body tomorrow, to
+congratulate him on his recovery. After that, _Te Deum_ in the
+cathedral, which the court and authorities must attend by command.
+
+"Your Imperial Highness's pew will be in readiness, but my sublime
+master has not deigned to graciously announce that he wishes to receive
+Your Imperial Highness,"--this from the toad Baumann, who but yesterday
+licked my boots.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 16, 1902_.
+
+Another straw indicating the direction of the wind--the ill-wind.
+
+King George commanded Bernhardt to be madman no longer and come and live
+in Dresden. Since his arrival he has paid assiduous court to all members
+of the royal family, but me. He called on the royal ministers, the
+courtiers, the high civil authorities, but my apartments have seen him
+not. I don't blame the boy for making the best of the situation, but was
+it really necessary to offer gratuitous insult to the only relative that
+stood by him when in trouble?
+
+Doubtless, he took his cue from the King, who cut me dead while, with
+the rest, I thanked God for his recovery.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    _November 20, 1902._
+
+The Tisch is openly talking Sonnenstein. "The royal apartments are ready
+for her reception," she let fall yesterday.
+
+Old Andrew, my confidential servant, told me.
+
+She shows me the face of a bull-dog about to spring at a victim, a
+sea-green devil filled with vinegar and gall, but affects icy courtesy.
+
+Frederick Augustus is down in the mouth. If he knows of any evil
+intention against me, he evidently made up his mind to hold his tongue
+and avoid scenes.
+
+Richard keeps on saying: "Don't worry. After all, what can they do to
+you?" He doesn't know, or doesn't want to understand that, while the law
+holds out protection for all, from pedlars and vagabonds to and
+including prime ministers, royalty itself is only technically above the
+law; in _praxis_ we are beyond the benefits of all law, human and
+otherwise.
+
+To be sure, a Cit is sometimes unjustly treated, but with tenacity and a
+small amount of courage, he finds his remedy in the courts and in the
+press.
+
+To royal princes and princesses the King is both judge and executioner,
+as the cases of the Duke of Saxony and Bernhardt show. Maybe it pleases
+His Majesty to cloak his tyranny by convoking a commission, but what of
+it, since the commission is invariably made up of his creatures,
+trained, if not commanded, to do the all-highest will and nothing but
+the all-highest will?
+
+As in days gone by, the poor "witch"--if she be young and comely--must
+face her accusers naked, the sworn torturer at her elbow, so I have no
+standing in law or decency before the Powers over social life or death
+in our sphere of society.
+
+If there be blemishes in my character, the King sees them magnified by
+the sharp tongues of evil creatures, his spies. There is no privacy. I
+must submit to be stared at, to have my flesh lacerated by curious eyes,
+and, as in the case of the old-time "witches," the handsomest were
+condemned the quicker because "the devil was more liable to choose them
+for an abode than ugly ones," so my very beauty will hasten my
+destruction.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXV
+
+FISTICUFFS DON'T SAVE MY CROWN
+
+    The attempted theft of my Diary--Grand Mistress discovered after
+    breaking open my desk--Reading Diary like mad--Personal encounter
+    between me and Grand Mistress--I am the stronger, and carry off the
+    manuscript, but have to leave all my love letters, which go to the
+    King--I discover that they had stolen the key to my Diary from my
+    neck.
+
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 27, 1902_.
+
+I am undone.
+
+They tried to obtain a picture of Louise _in the nude_--Louise as she
+paints _Herself_--this Diary, in fact--and, though I foiled them, the
+King now has in his hands my entire correspondence--every letter from
+every man that ever approached or possessed me.
+
+And be sure he won't use them for curl papers as did the Duke of
+Richelieu with the remnants of his ladyloves' _billets doux_ that
+escaped confiscation.
+
+"My collection is incomplete. I have to begin another," he said.
+
+Alas, my collection was only _too_ complete!
+
+This is how it came about:
+
+As I was in the act of retiring last night, a clairvoyant's vision
+seized me. "Somebody meddling with your papers!" "They are breaking into
+your _secretaire_," the voices said.
+
+I slipped on a pair of bath sandals and stealthily opened the door of my
+boudoir.
+
+My writing desk was open, all the drawers ajar and in disorder; the
+Baroness bending over this, my Diary. She was reading like mad, her eyes
+danced with lust of revenge.
+
+With one bound I was at her side and she was so frightened at first, I
+thought she would drop. Her chest seemed to draw inward; she swayed to
+and fro. But only for a second or two. Then, recovering her
+self-possession, her fighting harness was in place again.
+
+"Go to your room, Royal Highness," she said in a tone of command. "These
+papers are confiscated in the name of the King."
+
+I was beside myself with rage. "My Diary," I cried; "instantly return it
+to me."
+
+More I couldn't say, for I had neither breath nor voice. My right hand
+was on the book when she attempted to seize it.
+
+I struck her hand with Richard's ring--I wish it was bigger, I wish it
+had a good diamond point--but she wouldn't let go. Then, before one
+could count one, two, three, I had hold of her--Heaven, how I enjoyed
+it; the satisfaction I had in giving rein to my passion, for all was up
+now, anyhow.
+
+With the left hand I caught her by the throat, while my good right boxed
+her ears after the homely manner mamma had taught me. Good, sound cuffs,
+I assure you, each liable to dislocate a tooth.
+
+"_Canaille_," I cried, "_miserable canaille_." I pushed her into a
+corner and recovered the Diary, folding it up quickly. I was holding the
+book close to my bosom when I crossed the room to regain my bedchamber.
+
+The Tisch after me, trying to snatch it back. I caught her on the chest
+and sent her flying. Then, with the manuscript, I made good my escape,
+leaving for the contemptible bird of prey all my love letters, reams of
+them, the oldest fifteen or more years old, the latest bearing
+yesterday's date.
+
+Once in my room, I recollected and made a grab at my throat. The key to
+my Diary was gone. They stole it, chain and all, while I was asleep, no
+doubt.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+    DRESDEN, _November 28, 1902_.
+
+Awakening, I find myself seated at the little table near the window.
+Both my hands are ink-spotted. So is my night-dress.
+
+I see, I have written an account of the battle. I must have done so
+some time after I returned from the field. It's well, for at the moment,
+I don't remember a thing.
+
+The palace clock strikes seven.
+
+The day of my doom.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXVI
+
+ABANDONED
+
+    My titled servants withdraw from me--An old footman my sole
+    support--Queen takes the children--Old Andrew plays spy for me.
+
+
+    _Afternoon._
+
+No one has come to see me. My household, my adjutants, marshal,
+chamberlains, equerries, the ladies of my entourage are on duty, but
+since I ordered my meals brought to the room, they pretend to assume
+that I'm too ill to see anyone. There may be no truth in the saying that
+rats leave the ship destined to sink, but the titled vermin royalty
+surrounds itself with certainly knows when to avoid dangerous craft.
+
+I rang for Andrew. The good, old man wouldn't put me to the humiliation
+of asking questions.
+
+"Your Imperial Highness's children are with Her Majesty," he said; and,
+coming a step nearer, he added in an undertone: "Baroness Tisch has been
+with His Majesty since nine in the morning."
+
+"You are a kind and brave man." I held out my hand.
+
+"If Your Imperial Highness has no immediate orders for me," continued
+the good soul, "I beg to be allowed to visit my friend, Hans, the King's
+body-servant."
+
+I thanked Andrew for his good intentions. "Wait in the ante-chamber
+until I am dressed."
+
+I donned a forty-mark costume that I keep on hand for the purpose; it
+didn't take me more than six or seven minutes.
+
+"I will have to leave by the secret staircase, Andrew."
+
+He understood and cleared the way for me.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LXVII
+
+FAMILY COUNCIL AT CASTLE
+
+    Rendezvous at studio--State takes my children from me--Madhouse or
+    flight--I brought fifty-two trunks to the palace--Depart with small
+    satchel--If I attempt to see my children I'll be seized as "mad
+    woman"--Varying emotions of the last ten minutes--Threatening
+    shadows thrown on a curtain decide me--Ready for flight--Diary the
+    last thing to go into the satchel.
+
+
+    _At Night. Eleven O'clock._
+
+They went into family council at six tonight and are still deliberating,
+Andrew reports. The Tisch, he says, acts as secretary; His Majesty, of
+course, presides.
+
+Present are the Dowager Queen, Mathilde and Isabelle. Then Frederick
+Augustus, Johann George, Max and Bernhardt. Baron George von Metzsch, a
+high government and court functionary and my enemy, attends as legal
+adviser to the King.
+
+It's in the nature of things that the Baron will do his worst to destroy
+me, but Bernhardt! Bernhardt, who held me in his arms, now one of my
+judges! He will have to be especially severe with his _quondam_ mistress
+lest the King suspect.
+
+While the sweet family bent over those love letters--I bet the Tisch
+withheld Henry's--I sat in Richard's studio, advising with him.
+
+"There are only two things to be considered: the madhouse or instant
+flight."
+
+"You dare advise me to leave my children?"
+
+"There are no nurseries in madhouses. Your children are lost to you,
+anyhow. If you remain, as an alleged insane person, you 'can't be
+trusted,' they'll argue, for you are helpless, legally, morally and
+physically.
+
+"If you run away to Switzerland, on the other hand, you are a free
+woman, under the protection of a republican government.
+
+"Switzerland, I needn't tell you, will not go to war to wrest your
+children from the royal family, but will afford you personally every
+advantage, legal and otherwise.
+
+"Decide quickly: are you going to make King George a present of yourself
+as well as of the five children you bore for the benefit of the
+Wettiners?"
+
+"Never."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+My mind is made up. My few belongings are packed. I, who came to Dresden
+with fifty-two trunks, leave the palace with a satchel, easy to carry. I
+take nothing but my personal jewels, the little money I own and some
+changes of linen.
+
+If I could only see my children for a moment or two, but the Queen has
+them in her keeping, and I might be seized as a "mad woman" if I dared
+leave my apartments and cross to those occupied by Her Majesty.
+
+And Frederick Augustus! He will miss me in his way.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Ten more minutes. I hear the distant clatter of a carriage. Richard
+driving to our rendezvous, two streets north of the palace gate.
+
+Will my limbs carry me to him and liberty? I pace the room to test their
+strength.
+
+"Louise," says the voice within,--"your last chance. Your good-natured
+husband, your darling children, your old parents, pomp and state and
+circumstance, indeed, a crown, you are going to abandon for--what?"
+
+A man whose carnal side only you know, a poor man, an artist without
+fame, a professional without future.
+
+Sadly perturbed in mind, I walk to the window. Those of His Majesty's
+cabinet, where the family council is in progress, are directly opposite.
+
+Shadows of men and women, rising from a sitting position, are thrown on
+the curtains.
+
+One of the shades slowly ascends.
+
+I see the Tisch pointing a bony finger to the windows of my boudoir.
+Von Metzsch stands by her side. They grin.
+
+You triumph, wretch and Jezebel?
+
+But when your _sbirri_, in an hour from now, or tomorrow morning early,
+invade my rooms, instructed to carry me away--bound hand and foot to a
+sofa, or in a straight jacket, perhaps--they will find the Crown
+Princess gone--her and her Diary.
+
+Both will be safe on foreign soil ere you can make arrangements for
+organized pursuit, for Richard and I will travel by carriage to a
+distant suburb, there mount the fast express and keep to our state room,
+engaged under an assumed name, until without the sphere of Saxon or
+German influence.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+A discreet knock. Andrew, my liberator! In his hand a tallow dip to
+light this Imperial Highness down back stairs to the new life of her
+choice.
+
+"One moment, old man, this book goes into the valise.
+
+"Hand me the blotter, please. Tears won't do.
+
+"And a couple more handkerchiefs from the top of the chiffonier,
+please."
+
+
+FINIS
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Secret Memoirs: The Story of Louise,
+Crown Princess, by Henry W. Fischer
+
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