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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Strange Adventures of Mr. Middleton + +Author: Wardon Allan Curtis + +Release Date: January 28, 2009 [EBook #27917] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STRANGE ADVENTURES MR. MIDDLETON *** + + + + +Produced by Barbara Tozier, Bill Tozier and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + +</pre> + +<div id="the_beginning"> </div> +<div id="cover"> + <img src="images/cover.png" width="597" height="900" alt="Two men smoke a hookah (one in Western garb, one in Eastern); the title of the book appears in a cloud above their heads." /> +</div> +<div id="title_page"><a class="pagenum disguise" id="pagei" title="i"> </a> + <h1>The<br /> + <em>Strange Adventures</em><br /> + of <em>Mr. Middleton</em></h1> + + <p id="author"><span class="stopword">BY</span><br /> + WARDON ALLAN CURTIS</p> + + <p id="publisher">CHICAGO<br /> + HERBERT S. STONE & COMPANY</p> + + <p id="date_published">MCMIII</p> + +</div> +<div id="contents"> + <h2><a class="pagenum disguise" id="pageiii" title="iii"> </a>CONTENTS</h2> + <p class="page_column">PAGE</p> + <ul> + <li><a href="#chapter_1">The Manner in Which Mr. Edward Middleton Encounters the Emir Achmed Ben Daoud</a> <a href="#page1" class="toc_page">1</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_2">The Adventure of the Virtuous Spinster</a> <a href="#page13" class="toc_page">13</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_3">What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Second Gift of the Emir</a> <a href="#page27" class="toc_page">27</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_4">The Adventure of William Hicks</a> <a href="#page34" class="toc_page">34</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_5">What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Third Gift of the Emir</a> <a href="#page49" class="toc_page">49</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_6">The Adventure of Norah Sullivan and the Student of Heredity</a> <a href="#page70" class="toc_page">70</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_7">What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Fourth Gift of the Emir</a> <a href="#page87" class="toc_page">87</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_8">The Pleasant Adventures of Dr. McDill</a> <a href="#page108" class="toc_page">108</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_9">What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Fifth Gift of the Emir</a> <a href="#page136" class="toc_page">136</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_10">The Adventure of Miss Clarissa Dawson</a> <a href="#page148" class="toc_page">148</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_11">What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Sixth Gift of the Emir</a> <a href="#page185" class="toc_page">185</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_12">The Unpleasant Adventure of the Faithless Woman</a> <a href="#page207" class="toc_page">207</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_13">What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Seventh Gift of the Emir</a> <a href="#page223" class="toc_page">223</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_14">The Adventure of Achmed Ben Daoud</a> <a href="#page260" class="toc_page">260</a></li> + <li><a href="#chapter_15">What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Eighth and Last Gift of the Emir</a> <a href="#page291" class="toc_page">291</a></li> + </ul> + + +</div> +<div id="chapter_1" class="chapter" style="border:none;"> + <p id="internal_title"><a class="pagenum" id="page1" title="1"> </a>The <em>Strange Adventures</em> of <em>Mr. Middleton</em></p> + + <h2>The Manner in Which Mr. Edward Middleton Encounters the Emir Achmed Ben Daoud.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">It was</span> a lowering and gloomy night in + the early part of the present century. + Mr. Edward Middleton, a gallant + youth, who had but lately passed his + twenty-third year, was faring northward along + the southern part of that famous avenue of + commerce, Clark Street, in the city of Chicago, + wending his way toward the emporium of + Mr. Marks Cohen. Suddenly the rain which + the cloudy heaven had been promising for + many hours, began to descend in great scattered + drops that presaged a heavy shower. + Mr. Middleton hastened his steps. It was + possible that if the dress-suit he wore, hired + for the occasion of the wedding of his friend, + Mr. Chauncey Stackelberg, should become + imbued with moisture in the shower that now + seemed imminent, Mr. Cohen, of whom he had + hired the suit, would not add to the modicum + <a class="pagenum" id="page2" title="2"> </a>agreed upon, a charge for pressing it. But if + his own suit for everyday wear, which he was + carrying under his arm with the purpose of + putting it on at good Mr. Cohen’s establishment, + should become wet, that would be a + serious matter. It was, in fact, his only suit + and that will explain the anxiety with which + he scanned the heavens. Suddenly, Pluvius + unloosed all the fountains of the sky, and with + scarcely a thought whither he was going, + Mr. Middleton darted into the first haven of + refuge, a little shop he happened to be just + passing. As the door closed behind him with + the tinkle of a bell in some remote recess, for + the first time he realized that the place he had + entered was utterly dark. His ears, straining + to their uttermost to make compensation for + the inability of his eyes to be of service to him + in this juncture, could no more than inform + him that the place was utterly silent. But to + his nose came the powerful fragrance of strange + foreign aromas such as he had never had experience + of before,—which, heavy and oppressive + in their cloying perfume, seemed the very + breath of mystery. All traffic had ceased + without, as the night was well advanced and + the rain beat so heavily that the few whom + <a class="pagenum" id="page3" title="3"> </a>business or pleasure had called abroad at that + hour, had sought shelter. But though the rain + now fell with a steady roar, Mr. Middleton, + perturbed by a nameless disquiet, was about to + rush forth into the tempest and seek other + shelter, when a door burst open and, outlined + against a glare of light, stood a gigantic man + who said in a deep, low voice that seemed to + pervade every corner of the room and cause + the air to shake in slow vibrations, “Salaam + aleikoom!” Which being repeated again, + Mr. Middleton replied:</p> + + <p>“I do not understand the German language.”</p> + + <p>A low, musical laugh greeted this remark + and the laugh resolving itself into a low, + musical voice that bade him enter, Mr. Middleton + found himself in a small boudoir of + oriental magnificence, facing a young man in + the costume of the Moslem nations, who sat + cross-legged upon a divan smoking a narghileh. + He was of perhaps twenty-six, somewhat slight, + but elegant of person. His face, extremely + handsome, betokened that he was a man of + intelligence and sensibility. Two brilliant, + sparkling eyes illumined his countenance and + the curl of his carmine lips was that of one who + while kind—without condescension and the + <a class="pagenum" id="page4" title="4"> </a>odiousness of patronage—to all whom the mischance + of fate had made his inferiors in fortune, + would not bend the fawning knee to any whom + the world calls great. Behind him stood a + giant blackamore, he of the voice that had + saluted Mr. Middleton. The blackamore was + dressed in crimson silk sparkling with an array + of gold lace, but his immense turban was snowy + white. Against his shoulder reposed a great + glittering scimetar and a dozen silver-mounted + pistols and poniards were thrust in his sash.</p> + + <p>Presently the young man removed the golden + mouth-piece of the narghileh from his lips and + regarding Mr. Middleton fixedly, remarked:</p> + + <p>“There is but one God and Mohammed is his + Prophet.”</p> + + <p>Now this was not the doctrine Mr. Middleton + had been taught in the Methodist Sunday + School in Janesville, Wisconsin, but disliking + to dispute with one so engaging as the handsome + Moslem, and having read in a book of etiquette + that it was very ill mannered to indulge + in theological controversy and, moreover, + being conscious of the presence of the blackamore + with the glittering scimetar, he began to + make his excuses for an immediate departure. + But the Moslem would not hear to this.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page5" title="5"> </a>“Mesrour will bear your garments to Mr. + Cohen. From your visage, I judge you to be a + person I wish to know. I take you to be + endowed with probity, discretion, and valor, + and not without wit, good taste, and good + manners. Mesrour, relieve the gentleman of + his burden.”</p> + + <p>Whereupon Mr. Middleton was compelled + to state that it was the garment on his back + that was to go to Mr. Cohen, though he feared + this confession would cause him to fall in the + estimation of the Moslem. But the stranger + relaxed none of his deference at this intimation + that Mr. Middleton was not a person of + consequence.</p> + + <p>“Mesrour, take two sequins from the ebony + chest. The price the extortionate tailor + charges, is some thirty piastres. Bring back + the change and a receipt.”</p> + + <p>“Salaam, effendim!” and Mesrour bowed + until the crown of his head was presented + toward his master, together with the palms of + his hands, and in this posture backed from + the room, leaving Mr. Middleton speculating + upon the wonder and alarm little Mr. Cohen + would experience at beholding the gigantic + Nubian in all his outlandish panoply. While + <a class="pagenum" id="page6" title="6"> </a>changing the dress suit for his street wear, + from a back room came the sound of the + blackamore moving about, chanting that weird + refrain, tumpty, tumpty, tum—tum; tumpty, + tumpty, tum—tum; which from Mesopotamia + to the Pillars of Hercules, from the time of + Ishmael to the present, has been the song of + the sons of the desert. What was his surprise + when the blackamore emerged. Gone were his + turban, his flowing trousers, his scimetar, pistols, + and poniards. He had on a long yellow + mackintosh, which did not, however, conceal + a pair of black and white checked pantaloons, + a red tie, and green vest, from each upper + pocket of which projected an ivory-handled + razor.</p> + + <p>“Don’t forget the change, Mesrour.”</p> + + <p>“No indeed, boss,” replied the blackamore, + whistling “Mah Tiger Lily,” as he departed.</p> + + <p>The Moslem provided Mr. Middleton with + one of those pipes which in various parts of + the Orient are known as narghilehs, hubble-bubbles, + or hookabadours, and seeing his guest + entirely at his ease, without ado began as follows:</p> + + <p>“My name is Achmed Ben Daoud, and I am + hereditary emir of the tribe of Al-Yam, which + <a class="pagenum" id="page7" title="7"> </a>ranges on the border of that fortunate part of + the Arabian peninsular known as Arabia the + Happy. My youngest brother, Ismail, desirous + of seeing the world, went to the court of + Oman, where struck by his inimitable skill in + narration, the imam installed him as royal + story-teller. But having in the space of a year + exhausted his stock of stories, the imam, who + is blessed with an excellent memory, discovering + that he was telling the same stories over + again, shut him up in a tower constructed of + vermilion stone quarried on the upper waters + of the great river Euphrates. There my poor + brother is to stay until he can invent a new + stock of stories, but being utterly devoid of + invention, only death or relenting upon the + part of the imam could release him. Hearing + of his plight, I went to the imam with + the proposition that I seek out some other + story-teller and that upon bringing him to + Muscat, my brother be released. But the + imam exclaimed that he was tired of tales of + genii and magicians, of enchantments and + spells, devils, dragons, and rocs.</p> + + <p>“‘These things are too common, too everyday. + Go to the country of the Franks and + bring me a story-teller who shall tell me tales + <a class="pagenum" id="page8" title="8"> </a>of far nations, and I will release Ismail, and + load him with treasure.’</p> + + <p>“‘My Lord,’ said I, ‘peradventure no Frank + story-teller will come. To guard against such + eventuality, I will myself go to the lands of + the Franks, there to learn of adventures worthy + the ear of your highness. This I will do that + my brother may be released from the vermilion + tower.’</p> + + <p>“‘Do this, and I will give him the vermilion + tower and make him grand vizier of the + dominions of Oman.’</p> + + <p>“As hereditary emir of the tribe of Al-Yam, + I am prince of a considerable population. + My revenues are sufficient to support life becomingly. + But desiring to escape attention, + and moreover, feeling that I could better get + in touch with all classes of the population, I + have established here in Chicago a small + bazaar for the sale of frankincense and myrrh, + the balsam of Hadramaut and attar of roses + from the vales of Nejd, coffee of Mocha—which + is in Arabia the Happy—dates from + Hedjaz, together with ornaments made from + wood grown in Mecca and Medina. Such is + my stock in trade. By day, Mesrour and I + dress like Feringhis. But at night, it pleases + <a class="pagenum" id="page9" title="9"> </a>us to cast aside the stiff garb of the infidel for + the flowing garments of my native land. + Mesrour then delights to make the obeisances + my rank deserves, but which in the presence + of the giaours would excite mocking laughter. + I have prospered. I have made acquaintances + and have learned of many adventures. But I + have made no friends. I have been much prepossessed + by your bearing and feel that I would + like to have you for a friend. I am also desirous + of observing the effect of the tales of + adventure I have been collecting. I need to + acquire skill in the art of narration, and accordingly, + I must have someone to tell them + to, a person whose complaisance will cause + him to overlook the faults of a novice. I am + exceedingly anxious to have the distinguished + honor of your company and if you have any + evenings when you are at leisure, I should be + only too glad to have you spend them here.”</p> + + <p>“I can come this day week,” said Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“So be it. On that occasion I will tell you + the tale of The Adventure of the Virtuous + Spinster. I have not asked you your calling + in life, for I am utterly without curiosity——”</p> + + <p>“I am a clerk in a law office,” said Mr. Middleton, + <a class="pagenum" id="page10" title="10"> </a>quickly, “where I perform certain tasks + and at the same time study law, and it is my + hope to be soon admitted to the bar.”</p> + + <p>Prince Achmed regarded him earnestly for a + moment, and then withdrew to return with a + sandalwood case in his hands. This he opened + to disclose a leathern-bound volume. Upon + the cover was stamped a great gilt monogram + of letters in some strange language. The + edges were stained a brilliant and peculiarly + vivid green. The pages were of fine pearl-colored + vellum, covered with strange characters + in black. Each chapter began with a great + red initial surrounded by an illuminated design + of many colored arabesques. It was + indeed a volume to cause a book-lover to cry + out with joy.</p> + + <p>“Here is all the law man needs, the sacred + Koran. Here is the beginning and end of law, + the source of regulations that ensure righteous + conduct, the precepts of Mohammed, + prophet of Allah. If other laws agree with + those of the Koran, they are needless. If they + disagree, they are evil. Study this guide of + life, my friend, and there will be no need to + worry your brain with tomes of the presumptuous + wights who from their own imaginings + <a class="pagenum" id="page11" title="11"> </a>dare attempt to dictate laws and impiously + substitute them for the laws revealed to Mohammed + from on high. Accept this gift and + study it.”</p> + + <p>With the sandalwood case containing the + precious volume of the law under his arm, + Mr. Middleton departed. After the lapse of + three days, finding no immediate prospect of + learning the Arabic language, and fearful of + offending Prince Achmed if he returned the + book, and having no possible use for it, he + took it to a bibliophile, who exclaiming that + it was the handiwork of a Mohammedan monastery + of Damascus and bore on the cover the + monogram of the fifth Fatimite caliph, and was + therefore a thousand years old, he told Mr. + Middleton that though it was worth much + more, he could offer him but five hundred dollars, + which sum the astonished friend of + Achmed received in a daze, and departed to + invest in a well located lot in a new suburb. + Having no use for the sandalwood case after + the Koran had been disposed of, he presented + it to a young lady of Englewood as a receptacle + for handkerchiefs.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton said nothing of these transactions + when on the appointed evening he once + <a class="pagenum" id="page12" title="12"> </a>more sat in the presence of the urbane prince + of the tribe of Al-Yam. Having handed him a + bowl of delicately flavored sherbet, Achmed + began to narrate The Adventure of the Virtuous + Spinster.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_2" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page13" title="13"> </a>The Adventure of the Virtuous Spinster.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">Miss Almira Johnson</span> was a virtuous + spinster, aged thirty-nine, who + lived in a highly respectable boarding-house + on the north side. Her + days she spent in keeping the books of a + large leather firm, in an office which she shared + with two male clerks who were married, and a + red-headed boy of sixteen, who was small for + his age.</p> + + <p>On the evening when my tale begins, Miss + Almira, tastefully attired for her night’s rest + in a white nightgown trimmed with blue lace, + was peeping under the bed for the ever-possible + man, the nightly rite preliminary to her + prayers. She fell back gasping in a vain + attempt to scream, but not a sound could she + give vent to. The precaution of years had + been justified. <em>There lay a man!</em> He was + habited in a very genteel frock-suit, patent-leather + shoes, and although it must have + caused him some inconvenience in his recumbent + position, upon his head was a correct plug + hat. The elegance and respectability of his + <a class="pagenum" id="page14" title="14"> </a>garb somewhat reassured Miss Almira, who + was unable to believe that one so apparelled + could have secreted himself under her bed for + an evil purpose, when a new fear seized her, + for arguing from this assumption, she concluded + he must have been placed there by + others and was, in short, dead. Whereupon, + having to some degree recovered possession of + herself, she was opening her mouth to scream + at this new terror, when the man spoke.</p> + + <p>“Listen before you scream, I pray thee, + beauteous lady, darling of my life, pearl of my + desires, star of my hopes.”</p> + + <p>The strangeness of the address and the unaccustomed + epithets caused Miss Almira to forbear, + for she could not hear what he had to + say and scream at the same time, and, moreover, + she remembered how twenty years before, + Jake Long had fled, never to return to her + side, when after telling her she was the sweetest + thing in the world, she had screamed as + his arms clasped about her in a bearish hug.</p> + + <p>“Fair lady, ornament of your sex, hear the + words of your ardent admirer before you blast + his hopes.”</p> + + <p>As he uttered these words, the stranger extricated + himself from his undignified position + <a class="pagenum" id="page15" title="15"> </a>and sat down in a rocking chair before the + bureau. Miss Almira was more than ever + prepossessed as she saw he wore white kid + gloves and that in his shirt front gleamed a + large diamond. He removed his hat, disclosing + a heavy crop of black hair. He had blue + eyes and a strong, clean-shaven face.</p> + + <p>“For some time I have observed you and + wondered how I was to realize my fondest + hopes and make your acquaintance. All day + you are in the office, where the two married + men and the red-headed boy are always <em lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">de + trop</em>. My employment is of a nature that + takes me out nights. In fact, I teach a night + school for Italians. To-day being an Italian + holiday and so no school, and as there is a possibility + I shall soon leave the city for an extended + season, I have been unable to devise + any other means of declaring myself before the + time for my departure. Pray pardon me for + the abruptness and importunity of my declaration, + pray forgive me for the unusual way + which I have taken to secure an interview + alone with you. But if you only knew the + ardor of my love, my impatience—oh, would + that our union could be effected this very + night!”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page16" title="16"> </a>Ravished by the elegance of the stranger + both in his outward seeming and his converse, + melted by the warmth of a romantic devotion + almost unknown in these degenerate days, + though common enough of yore, Miss Almira + paused a moment in the proud compliance of + one about to gladly bestow an inestimable, but + hardly hoped-for gift, and crying, “It can be + done, it shall be done,” threw herself into the + cavalier’s arms.</p> + + <p>“How so?” asked the stranger, after Miss + Almira had disengaged herself at the elapse of + a proper interval.</p> + + <p>“Why, the Rev. Eusebius Williams has the + next room. We will call him.”</p> + + <p>“But,” said the stranger, “I thought the + occupant of the next room was Mr. Algernon + Tibbs, a gentleman from the country, who has + recently sold a large number of hogs here in + the city and has been ill in his room for a + space by reason of a contusion on the head + from a gold brick, which was, so to speak, + twice thrown at his head, once figuratively as + a ridiculously fine bargain which he refused to + take, and again when the owner, angered, + struck him with the rejected gold.”</p> + + <p>“I see,” said Miss Almira archly, “that in + <a class="pagenum" id="page17" title="17"> </a>planning for this, you have tried to study the + lay of the land; but be gratified, sir, for the + lucky chance which prevented a sad mistake. + Mr. Tibbs and I do occupy adjoining rooms. + But the one Mr. Tibbs occupies is really mine. + To-day we exchanged and I will remain here + for the four or five days Mr. Tibbs is to be in + the city. He has a large sum of money in his + possession, so we all infer. At any rate, he + was afraid to sleep in this room, where there is + a fire escape at the window, and took mine, + where an unscalable wall prevents access. + Suppose the Italian holiday had been last + night and you had come then. He would then + have taken you for a robber, notwithstanding + that anybody could see you are a gentleman.”</p> + + <p>For the first time did Miss Almira become + conscious she was not robed as one should be + while receiving callers, and blushing violently, + she leaped into bed, whence she bid the + stranger retire for a bit until she could dress, + when they would invoke the kindly offices of + the Rev. Eusebius Williams.</p> + + <p>“Your name,” she called, as the stranger + was about to retire.</p> + + <p>“My name,” said he impressively, “which + will soon be yours, is Breckenridge Endicott.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page18" title="18"> </a>“Mulvane,” said Mr. Breckenridge Endicott + to himself, noiselessly descending the stairs, + “what if she had screamed before you had + pulled yourself together and thought of that + stunt? You didn’t get old Tibb’s money, but + you did get—away.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Endicott tried the front door. To his + apparent annoyance, there was no bolt, no + knob to unlock it, and key there was none. + In the parlors, he could hear the voices of + boarders.</p> + + <p>“No way there, Mulvane,” said Mr. Endicott. + “I’ll go into the kitchen and walk out + the back door. If there’s anybody there, + they’ll think me a new boarder.”</p> + + <p>But he started violently and stood for some + moments trembling for no assignable reason, as + he saw in front of the range a fat German + hired girl sitting in the lap of a fat Irish + policeman.</p> + + <p>“No go through Almira’s room to the fire + escape. But perhaps I can get out on the roof + and get away somehow. She can’t have + dressed so soon,” and he ascended the stairs to + run plump into Miss Almira, who popped out of + her room, resplendent in a rustling black silk.</p> + + <p>“Oh, you impatient thing,” said Miss Almira, + <a class="pagenum" id="page19" title="19"> </a>shaking a reproving finger. “I put this on, + and then I thought I ought to wear something + white, and so came out to tell you not to get + impatient waiting, and why I kept you so + long,” and back she popped.</p> + + <p>“You are up against it, Mulvane,” said Mr. + Breckenridge Endicott, sitting disconsolately + down upon the stairs. “Hold on, just the + thing. Why, as her husband, you’ll live here + unsuspected and get in with old Tibbs. Why, + the job will be pie. It won’t be mean to her, + either. When you just vanish, she’ll have + ‘Mrs.’ tacked to her name, and that’ll help + her. It will be lots of satisfaction. They + can’t call her an old maid. ‘Better ’tis to have + loved and lost than never to have loved at all.’ + I’ll give her some of the boodle. She isn’t bad + looking. Wonder why nobody ever grabbed + on to her. If I had enough to live well, I’d + marry her myself and settle down.”</p> + + <p>The Rev. Eusebius Williams, with ten dollars + fee in his right pantaloons pocket, and the + radiant Almira, did not look happier during + the wedding ceremony than did Mr. Breckenridge + Endicott.</p> + + <p>It was seldom that Mr. Endicott was absent + from the side of his wife during the next few + <a class="pagenum" id="page20" title="20"> </a>days. Occasionally pleading urgent business, + he left her to go down town with Mr. + Tibbs, whom he was seeking to interest in a + plan to extract gold from sea water, a plan + upon which Mr. Tibbs looked with some favor, + for as presented by Mr. Endicott, it was one + of great feasibility and promised enormous + profits. In the setting forth of the method of + extraction, Mr. Endicott was much aided by + his wife, who overhearing him in earnest consultation + with Mr. Tibbs bounded in and demanded + to know what it was all about. Mr. + Endicott demurred, saying it was an abstruse + matter which should not burden so poetical a + mind as hers. But Mr. Tibbs set it forth to + her briefly. Having in her youth made much + of the sciences of chemistry and physics, to + the great amaze and admiration of Mr. Endicott, + she launched into a most lucid explication + of the practicability of the plan, leaving + Mr. Tibbs more than ever inclined to venture + his thousands.</p> + + <p>“By Jove, she’ll do, Mulvane. Why cut and + run? Take her along. She is a splendid + grafter,” said Mr. Endicott to himself, as he + and his wife withdrew from the presence of + Mr. Tibbs. “My dear,” he continued aloud, + <a class="pagenum" id="page21" title="21"> </a>“I was overcome by respect for the way you + aided me. You are indeed a jewel. I had + never suspected you understood me, knew + what I was, until you came in and explained that + sucker trap. You are a most unexpected ally. + You perceive clearly how the thing works?”</p> + + <p>“Why, of course, Breckenridge. I have not + studied science in vain, though I do not recall + what part of the machine you call ‘sucker trap’. + Doubtless the contrivance marked ‘converter,’ + in the drawings. Of course I understood you, + right from the first, a noble, noble man, and so + romantic. But Brecky, dear, why let other + people share in this invention? Why not make + all the money ourselves and become million, + millionaires? I shall build churches and + libraries and support missionaries. Why let + Mr. Tibbs, who is a somewhat gross person, + enjoy any of the fruits of your genius?”</p> + + <p>Whereupon Mr. Endicott’s face took on an + expression of deep disappointment, disillusionment, + and sorrow, until seeing his own sorrow + mingled with alarm reflected on his wife’s + face, he presently announced that they would + depart on their wedding journey by boat for + Mackinac three days hence.</p> + + <p>“I shall stop fiddle-faddling and settle the + <a class="pagenum" id="page22" title="22"> </a>business which delays me here, at one stroke. + The old simple methods are the best.”</p> + + <p>As Mr. and Mrs. Breckenridge Endicott + were entering their cab to drive to the wharf, + Mrs. Maxon, the landlady, came hurriedly + with the scandal that Mr. Algernon Tibbs had + been found in his room in the stupor of intoxication.</p> + + <p>“Why, he might have been robbed while in + that condition,” said Mrs. Maxon.</p> + + <p>“He will not be robbed while under your + roof,” said Mr. Endicott gallantly. “He is + safe from robbing now. He will not, he cannot, + I may say, be robbed now.”</p> + + <p>The sun was touching the western horizon as + the steamer glided out of the river’s mouth. + The wind lay dead upon the water, and for a + space the pair sat in the tender light of declining + day indulging in the pleasures of conversation, + but at length Mr. Endicott led his wife to + their stateroom.</p> + + <p>“On this auspicious day, I wish to make you + a gift,” and he handed her a thousand dollars + in bills. “My presence is now required on the + lower deck for a time. Be patient during my + absence,” whereupon he embraced her with an + ardor he had never shown before and there + <a class="pagenum" id="page23" title="23"> </a>was in his voice a strange ring of regret and + longing such as Almira had never listened to. + It thrilled her very soul and bestowing upon + him a shower of passionate kisses and an embrace + of the utmost affection, their parting took + on almost the agony of a parting for years.</p> + + <p>“Where the devil is that coal passer Mullanphy, + I gave a job to?” said the engineer on the + lower deck. “Is he aboard?”</p> + + <p>“His dunnage is in his bunk, but nobody + ain’t seen him,” replied one of the crew.</p> + + <p>“Who the devil is that geezer in a Prince + Albert and a plug hat that just went in back + there, and what the devil is he up to?” said + the engineer again, as a black-clothed figure + passed toward the stern.</p> + + <p>A few moments later, a sturdy man in a + jumper and overalls, his face smeared with + grime, peered cautiously around a bulkhead, + and seeing nobody, stepped quickly to the + side of the vessel, bearing a limp and spineless + figure in a black frock and silk hat. With a + dextrous movement, he cast the thing forth, + and as it went flopping through the air and + slapped the water, from somewhere arose the + voice of Mr. Breckenridge Endicott crying, + “Help! help! help!”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page24" title="24"> </a>Mrs. Endicott, full of dole at the absence of + her spouse and oppressed with a nameless disquiet, + had paced the upper deck impatiently, + and at this moment stood just above where her + beloved went leaping to his doom. With one + wild scream, she jumped, she scrambled, she + fell to the lower deck, colliding with a man + leaning out looking at the sinking figure. + Down, with a vain and frantic clutching at the + side that only served to stay his fall so that he + slipped silently into the water under the vessel’s + counter, went the unfortunate man.</p> + + <p>Plump, into the yawl with the rescue crew, + went Mrs. Endicott. Far astern through the + dusk could be seen a black silk hat on the still + water. Astern could be heard the voice of + Mr. Breckenridge Endicott crying, “Quick, + quick! I can swim a little, but I am almost + gone!”</p> + + <p>“Turn to the left, to the left,” cried Mrs. + Endicott.</p> + + <p>“But the cries come from the right,” said + the coxswain.</p> + + <p>“That’s his hat to the left. I know his hat. + I saw him fall. I know his voice. It’s his hat + and his voice.”</p> + + <p>The crew could have sworn that the cries + <a class="pagenum" id="page25" title="25"> </a>came from the right, but to the hat they + steered and the cries ceased before their + arrival. They lifted the hat. Nothing beneath + but eighty fathoms of water.</p> + + <p>It was some time thereafter that a fisherman + came upon a corpse floating inshore. Its face + was bloated to such an extent as to prevent + recognition. Its clothes were those of a steamboat + roustabout. In the breastpocket was a + large pocketbook bearing in gilt letters the + legend, “Mr. Breckenridge Endicott.”</p> + + <p>“The present I gave him on the morning of + our departure!” exclaimed Miss Almira, “now + so strangely found on the dead body of the + man who robbed him and probably murdered + him.”</p> + + <p>Although soaked, the bills were redeemable. + The fisherman was a fisherman who owned a + town house on Prairie Avenue and a country + house at Oconomowoc and he would take no + reward. The bills amounted to nine thousand + dollars. Taking her fortune, Almira retired + to her former home in Ogle county, Illinois, + where once more meeting Mr. Jake Long, + lately made a widower, after a decent period + of waiting, they became man and wife. So it + ended happily for all except the person who + <a class="pagenum" id="page26" title="26"> </a>called himself Mr. Breckenridge Endicott—though + I suspect that was not his name—and + for Mr. Algernon Tibbs. Lest you waste pity + on Mr. Algernon Tibbs, let me say that in his + youth, he was accustomed to kill little girl’s + cats, and that his fortune was entirely one he + beat out of his brother-in-law, James Wilkinson.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_3" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page27" title="27"> </a>What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Second Gift of the Emir.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">“The</span> individual whose sad taking-off I + have just narrated,” said the emir of + the tribe of Al-Yam, “affords an excellent + example of the power of + good clothes. Suppose he had secreted himself + under Miss Almira’s bed wearing a + jumper, overalls, and a mask. He would + have been arrested and lodged in the penitentiary.”</p> + + <p>“But he is now dead,” said Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“He had better be dead, than continuing + his career of villainy and crime,” quoth the emir + sternly, and then passing his eyes over the person + of Mr. Middleton, he remarked the somewhat + threadbare and glossy garments of that + excellent young man. “If you would accept a + suit of raiment from me,” continued the emir + with a hesitation that betrayed the delicacy + which was one of the most marked of the many + estimable traits that made his character so + <a class="pagenum" id="page28" title="28"> </a>admirable, “I would be overjoyed and obliged. + The interests of you, my only friend in this + vast land, have become to me as my own. + Unfortunately I have no Frank clothes except + the one suit I wear daily. But of the costumes + of my native land, I have abundant store, and + as we are of the same stature, I beg you will + make me happy by accepting one.”</p> + + <p>Speaking some words to Mesrour in the + language of Arabia, the blackamore brought in + and proceeded to invest Mr. Middleton with + an elegant silken habit consisting of a pair of + exceedingly baggy trousers of the hue of + emeralds, a round jacket whose crimson + rivalled the rubies of Farther Ind, and a vest + of snowy white. Double rows of small pearls + ornamented the edges of the jacket, which was + short and just met a copper-colored sash about + the waist. After inducting him into a pair of + white leggings and bronze shoes, Mesrour + clapped upon his head a large white turban + ornamented with a black aigret.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton looked very well in his new + garments and while the emir was complimenting + him upon this fact and the grace of his + bearing and Mr. Middleton was uttering protestations + of gratitude, Mesrour busied himself, + <a class="pagenum" id="page29" title="29"> </a>and Mr. Middleton, turning with intent to + resume his wonted garb, was astonished to + find it in a network of heavy twine tied with a + multiplicity of knots.</p> + + <p>“Mesrour will bring you your Frank clothes + in the morning. I am very tired, and so I will + bid you good night,” and the yawn which now + overspread the face of the accomplished + prince told more than his words that the audience + was ended.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton looked at the bundle with its + array of knots. To untie it would require a + long time and the prince was repeating his + yawn and his good night. Even had he not + hesitated to offend the prince by demanding + opportunity to resume his customary vestments + and to weary him by making him wait for this + operation, which promised to be a long one, + he would have been without volition in the + matter; for in obedience to a gesture, Mesrour + grasped his arm and with great deference, but + inflexible and unalterable firmness, led him + through the shop and closed the street door + behind him.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton was greatly disconcerted at + finding himself in the street arrayed in these + brilliant and barbarous habiliments, but reflecting + <a class="pagenum" id="page30" title="30"> </a>that the citizens traveling the streets at + this hour would perhaps take him for some + high official in one of the many fraternal + orders that entertain, instruct, and edify the + inhabitants of the city, he proceeded on his + way somewhat reassured. As he was changing + cars well toward his lodgings, at a corner + where a large public hall reared its façade, he + heard himself accosted, and turning, beheld a + portly person wearing a gilt paper crown, a + long robe of purple velvet bordered with rabbit’s + fur spotted with black, and bearing in his + hand a bung-starter, which, covered with gilt + paper, made a very creditable counterfeit of a + royal scepter.</p> + + <p>“Come here once,” said this personage.</p> + + <p>With great affableness expressing a willingness + to come twice, if it were desired, Mr. + Middleton accompanied the personage, as with + an air of brooding mystery, the latter led him + down the street twenty feet from where they + had first stood.</p> + + <p>“Was you going to the masquerade?”</p> + + <p>“Yes,” said Mr. Middleton, divining from + the presence of the personage and two other + masquers whom he now beheld entering the + hall, that a masquerade was in progress.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page31" title="31"> </a>“What’ll you take to stay away?”</p> + + <p>“Why?”</p> + + <p>“You’ll take the prize.”</p> + + <p>“What is the prize and why should the possibility + of winning it deter me?”</p> + + <p>“The prize is five dollars. It’s this way. I + am a saloonkeeper. Gustaf Kleiner and I are + in love with the same girl. She is in love with + all both of us. She don’t know what to say. + She can’t marry all both, so she says she’ll + marry the one what gits the prize at the masquerade. + If you git the prize, don’t either of + us git the girl already. I’ll give you twenty + dollars to stay away.”</p> + + <p>“But what of Gustaf Kleiner? Have you + paid him?”</p> + + <p>“He is going to be a devil. I hired two + Irishmans for five dollars to meet him up the + street, cut off his tail, break his horns, and put + whitewash on his red suit. He is all right. + I’ll make it thirty dollars and a ticket of the + raffle for my watch to-morrow.”</p> + + <p>“Done,” said Mr. Middleton, and he proceeded + to draw up a contract binding him to + stay away from the masquerade for a consideration + of thirty dollars.</p> + + <p>It was not the least remarkable part of his + <a class="pagenum" id="page32" title="32"> </a>adventure that he did not meet Gustaf Kleiner + in his damaged suit and for a consideration of + fifty dollars, lend him the magnificent Oriental + costume. He did not see Gustaf Kleiner at + all, nor did he win the watch in the raffle and + the chronicler hopes that the setting down of + these facts will not cause the readers to doubt + his veracity, for he is aware that usually these + things are ordered differently.</p> + + <p>Having kept the Oriental costume for several + days and seeing no prospect of ever wearing it, + and his small closet having become crowded + by the presence of a new twenty-dollar suit + which he purchased with part of his gains, he + presented it to the young lady in Englewood + previously mentioned, who reduced the ruby red + jacket to a beautiful bolero jacket, made a table + throw of the sash, and after much hesitation + seized the exceedingly baggy trousers—which + were made with but one seam—and ripping them + up, did, with a certain degree of confusion, + fashion them into two lovely shirt waists. + But she did not wear them in the presence of + Mr. Middleton and did not even mention them + to him. Nor did Mr. Middleton allude to any + of these transactions when on the appointed + day and hour he again sat in the presence of + <a class="pagenum" id="page33" title="33"> </a>the urbane prince of the tribe of Al-Yam. + Handing him a bowl of delicately flavored + sherbet, Achmed began to narrate The Adventure + of William Hicks.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_4" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page34" title="34"> </a>The Adventure of William Hicks.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">Young William Hicks</span> was a native of + the village of Bensonville, in the + southern part of Illinois. Having, at + the age of twenty, graduated at the + head of a class of six in the village school, his + father thought to reward him for his diligence + in study by a short trip to the city of Chicago, + which metropolis William had never beheld. + Addressing him in a discourse which, while not + long, abounded in valuable advice, Mr. Hicks + presented his son with a sum of money sufficient + for a stay of a week, provided it were not + expended imprudently.</p> + + <p>One evening, William was walking along + Wabash Avenue, feeling somewhat lonely as + he soberly reflected that not one in all that + vast multitude cared anything about him, when + he heard himself accosted in a most cheery + manner, and looking up, beheld a beautiful + lady smiling at him. It was plain that she + belonged to the upper classes. A hat of very + large proportions, ornamented with a great + <a class="pagenum" id="page35" title="35"> </a>ostrich plume, shaded a head of lovely yellow + hair. She was clothed all in rustling purple + silk and sparkled with jewelry. Her cheeks + and lips glowed with a carmine quite unknown + among the fair but pale damosels of Bensonville, + which is situated in a low alluvial location, + surrounded by flat plains, the whole being + somewhat damp and malarial. William had + never imagined eyes so wide open and glistening.</p> + + <p>“My name is Willy, to be sure. But you + have the advantage of me, for ashamed as I am + to say it, I cannot quite recall you. You are + not the lady who came to Bensonville and + stayed at the Campbellite minister’s?”</p> + + <p>“Oh, how are all the dear folks in Bensonville? + But, say, Will, don’t you want to come + along with me awhile and talk it all over?”</p> + + <p>“I should be honored to do so, if you will + lead the way. I confess I am lonely to-night, + and I always enjoy talking over old times.”</p> + + <p>At this juncture, a sudden look of alarm + spread over the lady’s beauteous face and a + lumbering minion of the law stepped before + her.</p> + + <p>“Up to your old tricks, eh?” he growled. + “Didn’t I tell you that the next time I caught + <a class="pagenum" id="page36" title="36"> </a>you tackling a man, I’d run you in? Run you + in it is. Come on, now.”</p> + + <p>“Oh, oh,” panted the lady, and great tears + welled into her adorable eyes. At that moment, + there was a crash in the street, as a poor + Italian exile had his push cart overturned by + the sudden and unexpected backing of a cab. + The policeman turned to look and, like a + frightened gazelle, the lady bounded away, + closely followed by young William.</p> + + <p>“Is there nothing I can do? Cannot I complain + to the judge for you, or address a communication + to some paper describing and + condemning this conduct?”</p> + + <p>“Is he coming? Is he coming?” asked the + lady, piteously.</p> + + <p>“No. But if he were, I would strike him, + big as he is. Cannot a former visitor in Bensonville + greet one of its citizens without interference + from the police?”</p> + + <p>Hereupon the lady, who seemed to be giving + little heed to what William was saying, beyond + the information that the policeman was not in + pursuit, gave a gay little laugh of relief, which + caused William’s eyes to light in pitying sympathy.</p> + + <p>“Now that we are away from him, what do + <a class="pagenum" id="page37" title="37"> </a>you say to a friendly game of cards somewhere, + to pass away the evening, which hangs + heavy on my hands and doubtless does on + yours?”</p> + + <p>“I have never played cards,” said William, + “for while there is nothing intrinsically wrong + in them, they are the vehicle of much that is + injurious, and at the very least, they cause one + to fritter away valuable time in profitless + amusement.”</p> + + <p>“Oh, la! you are wrong there,” said the + lady, with a little silvery laugh. “They are + not a profitless amusement. Why, a man has + to keep his brains in good trim when he plays + cards, and whist is just as good a mental exercise + as geometry and algebra, or any other + study where the mind is engaged upon various + problems. You see I stand up for cards, for I + teach whist myself and I assure you that many + of the leading ladies of this city spend their + time in little else than whist, which they would + not do if cards were what you say. Before you + pass your opinion, why not let me show you + some of the fine points, and then you will have + something to base your judgment upon.”</p> + + <p>William, quite impressed by the elegance + and social standing of the lady, as well as + <a class="pagenum" id="page38" title="38"> </a>influenced by her beauty, despite her evident + seniority of ten or fifteen years, assented, and + the lady continued:</p> + + <p>“I would invite you to my own apartments, + but they are so far away, and as we are now in + front of the Hotel Dieppe, let us go up and + engage a room for a few hours and I will teach + you a few little interesting tricks with which + you can amuse the people of Bensonville, and + even obtain some profit, if you wish to. What + do you say?”</p> + + <p>William averring that he would be pleased + to receive the proffered instruction, she led the + way up a flight of stairs and paused in the + doorway of the hotel office, for the Hotel + Dieppe was a hostelry of no great pretentions + and occupied the upper stories of a building, + the lower floors of which were devoted to a + furniture emporium. Behind the counter stood + a low-browed clerk with a large diamond in his + shirt front, who scrutinized them keenly.</p> + + <p>“You get the room,” said the lady, coyly. + “I’m bashful and don’t like to go in there + where are all those smoking men. You may + take it in my name if you wish,—Madeleine + Montmorency.”</p> + + <p>“Number 15,” said the clerk, and in a space + <a class="pagenum" id="page39" title="39"> </a>William found himself in a dark room, alone + with the lady, and heard the door close behind + them and the key turn in the lock.</p> + + <p>“We are locked in!” exclaimed Miss Montmorency.</p> + + <p>“What’s that?” said a deep voice in the + darkness.</p> + + <p>Miss Montmorency screamed, and screamed + again as William turned on the light and they + beheld a man lying in bed!</p> + + <p>William was stepping hastily to her side to + shield her vision from this improper spectacle, + when he paused as if frozen to the floor. The + man was now sitting up in bed and he had a <em>red + flannel night gown, one eye</em>, <strong class="emphasis">AND TWO NOSES</strong>!</p> + + <p>“What the devil are you doing here?” exclaimed + the monster in the red flannel nightgown.</p> + + <p>“That I will gladly tell you, for I would not + have you believe that we wantonly intruded + upon your slumbers.” And thereupon William + related that he was a citizen of Bensonville + who had met a former visitor there and + they had come here to talk over mutual + acquaintances and improve their minds by + discreet discourse. “But, sir,” he said, in + concluding, “pardon my natural curiosity concerning + <a class="pagenum" id="page40" title="40"> </a>yourself. Who are you and why are + you?”</p> + + <p>“If I had the printed copies of my life here, + I would gladly sell you one, but I left them all + behind. My name is Walker Sheldrup. I am + registered from Springfield, Mass., but I am + from Dubuque, Iowa. I was born in Sedalia, + Mo., where my father was a prominent citizen. + It was he who led the company of + men who, with five ox teams, hauled the + courthouse away from Georgetown and laid + the foundations of Sedalia’s greatness. Had + he lived, Sedalia would not have tried in vain + to swipe the capital from Jefferson City. As a + youth I was distinguished—but I’ll cut all that + out. Your presence here and the door being + locked behind you only too surely warns me + that we have no time to lose. They have + taken you for the snake-eating lady and the + rubber-skinned boy, who ran away when I did + and who were to meet me here in Chicago. If + you will turn your heads away so I can dress, I + will continue. You have heard of prenatal + influences. Shortly before I was born, my + mother made nine pumpkin pies and set them + to cool on a stone wall beneath the shade of a + large elm. As luck would have it, a menagerie + <a class="pagenum" id="page41" title="41"> </a>passed by and an elephant grabbed those pies + one after another and ate them. The sight of + that enormous pachyderm gobbling my mother’s + cherished handiwork, completely upset + her. I was born with two noses like the two + tusks of the beast. At the same time, like the + trunk, they are movable. My two noses are as + mobile and useful as two fingers and if you + have a quarter with you, I will gladly perform + some curious feats. My noses being so near + together, ordinarily, I join them with flesh-colored + wax. I then seem to have but one + nose, although a very large one. I thus escape + the annoying attention of the multitude, which + is very disagreeable to a proud man of good + family, like me. Young man, do you ever + drink? In Dubuque, they got me drunk so I + didn’t know what I was about and I signed a + contract with a dime museum company for + twenty-five dollars a week. Take warning + from my fate. Never drink, never drink.”</p> + + <p>“I can well imagine your sufferings at being + a spectacle for a ribald crowd,” said William. + “To a man of refined sensibilities, it must be + excruciating, and it was an outrage to entrap + you into such a contract.”</p> + + <p>“I ought to have had seventy-five and could + <a class="pagenum" id="page42" title="42"> </a>have got fifty. So I ran away. Well, now, + how are we going to get out of here? Can you + climb over the transom, young man?”</p> + + <p>As he said these words, the door flew open + and in rushed some villainous looking men, + who gagged, handcuffed, and shackled Miss + Montmorency, William, and the two-nosed + man.</p> + + <p>“We have the legal right to do this,” said + the leader, displaying the badge of the Jinkins + private detective agency. “Advices from + Dubuque set us at work. We early located + Sheldrup at this hotel, and when the clerk saw + the rubber-skinned boy and the snake-eating + lady come in, he suspicioned who they was at + once and by a great stroke, put ’em in with + old two-nose. Do you think we are going to + put you through for breach of contract and for + swiping that money out of the till on the claim + it was due you on salary? Nit. Cost too + much, take too much time, and you git sent to + jail instead of being back in the museum helping + draw crowds. We are in for saving time + and trouble for you, us, and your employer. + To-night you ride out of here for Dubuque, + covered up with hay, in the corner of the car + carrying the new trick horse for the museum. + <a class="pagenum" id="page43" title="43"> </a>Save your fare and all complications. Now, + boys, we want to work this on the quiet, so we + will just leave ’em all here until the streets are + deserted and there won’t be anybody around + to notice us gitting ’em into the hack.”</p> + + <p>“Hadn’t one of us better stay?” asked a + subordinate.</p> + + <p>“How can people gagged, their ankles + shackled, their hands handcuffed behind ’em, + git out? Why, I’ll just leave the handcuff + keys here on the table and tantalize ’em.”</p> + + <p>Tears welled in the soft, beauteous orbs of + Miss Montmorency and William’s eyes spoke + keen distress, but Mr. Sheldrup’s eyes gleamed + triumphantly above the cloth tied about the + lower part of his face. Hardly had the steps + of the detectives died away on the stair, when + a little click was heard behind Miss Montmorency + and her handcuffs fell to the floor. + There stood Mr. Sheldrup, politely bowing, + with the key held between his two noses. She + seized it and in a twinkling, the bonds of all + had been removed and, forcing the door, they + started away. At the street entrance stood + the policeman who had insulted Miss Montmorency!</p> + + <p>“Oh, he’s waiting for me, and I’ll get six + <a class="pagenum" id="page44" title="44"> </a>months. He knew where I’d go. I haven’t + any money,” and tears not only filled the + wondrous optics of poor Miss Montmorency, + but flowed down her cheeks.</p> + + <p>“Six months, your grandmother. I’ll not go + back on you. Young man, follow me into the + office and when I am fairly in front of the + clerk, give me a shove,” and the two-nosed + man, with a grip in each hand, walked up to + the clerk and began to rebuke him for his + ungentlemanly and unprincipled conduct.</p> + + <p>“You white-livered son of a sea-cook, you + double-dyed, concentrated essence of a skunk,” + and at that moment young William pushed + him and the two-nosed gentleman lurched forward, + and bending his head to avoid contact + with the clerk’s face, it rested against the latter’s + bosom for a moment. Departing immediately, + at the foot of the stairs the two-nosed + gentleman said to the policeman:</p> + + <p>“Officer, please let this lady pass. For + various reasons, I desire it enough to spare + this stud, which will look well upon the best + policeman on the force.”</p> + + <p>“All right,” said the policeman. “Go along + for all of me, Bet Higgins,” and he courteously + accepted the diamond.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page45" title="45"> </a>“My stage name,” said Miss Montmorency, + in answer to an inquiring look from William. + “The name I sign to articles in the Sunday + papers.”</p> + + <p>“Now of course they are watching all the + depots,” said the two-nosed gentleman. + “Before they located me here they did that, + and as they have also been looking for the + snake-eating lady and the rubber-skinned boy, + our late captors have not had time to notify + them that we have been captured. It is useless + to try to escape that way, then; it is too far to + walk out, or go by street car, and as it is a + fair, moonlight night with a soft breeze, I am + for getting a boat and sailing out.”</p> + + <p>After some search, they found a small sail + boat. Miss Montmorency had decided to flee + from the wicked city with the two-nosed gentleman. + She had heard such delightful reports + of Michigan. The owner of the boat not being + there and there being no probability that they + would ever return it, the two-nosed gentleman + wrote a check on a Dubuque bank for one hundred + and seventy-five dollars, and Miss Montmorency + an order on the school board for a + like amount, and these they pinned up where + the boatman could find them.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page46" title="46"> </a>“It will be quite like a fairy tale when the + good boatman comes in the morning and finds + this large sum left him by those to whom his + little craft has been of such inestimable service,” + said William, and then for fear the boatman + might not find the check and the order, + in two other places he pinned up cards giving + the whereabouts of the remuneration for the + boat and some statement concerning the circumstances + of its requisition. On the back of + one of the cards had been penciled his name + and city address, and though he had erased the + black of this inscription, the impression yet + remained distinctly legible. This erasure was + not due to any desire to conceal his identity or + lodgings, but because he had thought at first + that he could not get all the information on one + side of the card. Having seen his friends go + slipping out on the deep, he turned pensively + homeward, somewhat heavy of heart, for when + one faces perils with another, fast friendships + are quickly welded.</p> + + <p>In the morning, young William was arrested + and lodged in jail and a corrupt and venal + judge laughed with contempt at his plea. + After three long days in jail, came Mr. Hicks, + senior, who compounded with the boat owner + <a class="pagenum" id="page47" title="47"> </a>for two hundred and fifty dollars, the boat + being, as the owner swore, of Spanish cedar + with nickel-plated trimmings.</p> + + <hr class="thoughtbreak" /> + + <p>“That is always the way when a person of + good heart befriends another,” said Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“Alas, too often,” said the emir of the tribe + of Al-Yam. “But I am pleased to say that + when once across the lake, the two-nosed gentleman + married Miss Montmorency, who whatever + she might be, did not lack certainly + womanly qualities and had been the sport of + an unkind world. Having something to live + for, the two-nosed gentleman signed with a + Detroit dime museum company at seventy-five + dollars a week. His two noses were not the + most remarkable thing about him, for in course + of time hearing of young William’s misadventure, + he sent him a sum equivalent to all + the episode had cost him, together with a + handsome diamond stud, which he had with + great deftness and cleverness taken from the + officious policeman, as he visited the dime + museum with two ladies while spending his + vacation in Detroit. And this beautiful ornament + William delighted to wear, not merely + <a class="pagenum" id="page48" title="48"> </a>because of its intrinsic worth, which was considerable, + but through regard for its thoughtful + and considerate donor.”</p> + + <p>“The two-nosed man did truly show himself + a man of gratitude, and I am glad to hear of + such an instance. Yet from what you said of + him in the beginning of the tale, I should not + have expected it of him. How often is one + deceived by appearances and how hard it is to + trust to them.”</p> + + <p>“Even the wisest is unable to distinguish an + enemy wearing the guise of a friend, but we + may bring to our assistance the aid of forces + more powerful than our poor little human intelligence. + Let me present you with a talisman + which will ever warn you when any one plots + against you.”</p> + + <p>“How?”</p> + + <p>“How? You must wait until some one plots + against you and the talisman will answer that + question. Its ways of warning will be as manifold + as the plots villains may conceive. Here + is the talisman, an Egyptian scarabæus of pure + gold. So cunningly fashioned is it that not + nature itself made ever a bug more perfect in + the outward seeming.”</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_5" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page49" title="49"> </a>What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Third Gift of the Emir.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">Putting</span> the scarabæus in his left + trousers pocket, Mr. Middleton departed, + and as he went about his + affairs during the next several days, + he ceased to think of the talisman, but on the + fourth day his attention was recalled to it in a + way that indeed seemed to prove that it was a + charm possessed of the powers the emir of the + tribe of Al-Yam had attributed to it. He was + faring northward in a street car at eleven of + the morning, diverting himself with the study + of the passengers sitting opposite, when he + became aware that the scarabæus in his left + trousers pocket was slowly traveling up his leg. + Had the talisman been other than the heavy + object it was, he would not have noticed it, but + it was of too considerable weight to travel over + his person without making its progress felt. + Deterred by none of the superstitious tremors + which the unaccountable peregrinations of the + gold beetle would have excited in one less + <a class="pagenum" id="page50" title="50"> </a>intrepid, he quickly thrust his hand into his + pocket to close it over another hand already + there, a hand which beyond a first little start + to escape, lay passive and unresisting, a hand + soft and delicate, yet well-muscled withal, + long-fingered and finely formed. At the same + time, a well-modulated voice at his side exclaimed:</p> + + <p>“Why, I did not recognize you at first. I + was not looking when you came and you evidently + did not notice me.”</p> + + <p>“No, I did not,” said Mr. Middleton, composedly, + still retaining his grasp upon the hand + in his pocket. “I cannot see that you have + changed any,” he continued, scrutinizing the + young woman at his side, for she was young + and, moreover, of a very pleasing presence, + and he did not altogether rebel against the + circumstances that allowed him to fondle the + hand of one so comely. The day, which had + begun with a slight chill, had turned off warm + and she had removed her cloak, which, lying + across her own lap and partially across Mr. + Middleton’s, had been the blind behind which + she had introduced her hand into the pocket + where reposed the fateful talisman.</p> + + <p>The persons in the car seemed to take an + <a class="pagenum" id="page51" title="51"> </a>interest in this sudden recognition on the part + of a pair who had been riding side by side for + so long, oblivious of each other’s identity. + Moreover, the young woman was tastefully + gowned and of a very smart appearance, while + Mr. Middleton’s new suit became him and + fitted him nicely and altogether they were a + couple nearly any one would find pleasure in + looking upon. A slight movement to withdraw + the hand lying within his own, caused + Mr. Middleton’s grasp to tighten and almost + simultaneously, the young woman at his side + leaned forward and with a look in which sorrow + and pain were mingled, said in a lowered + voice:</p> + + <p>“Oh, I have such a dreadful thing to tell + you about our friend Amy. I hate to tell you, + but as I wish to bespeak your kind offices, I + must do so. I am going to ask you to be the + agent of a restitution. She has, oh, she has + become a kleptomaniac. With every luxury, + with her fine home on the Lake Shore Drive, + with all her father’s wealth, with no want + money can gratify, she takes things. In her + circumstances it is out of the question to call it + stealing. It is a mania, a form of insanity. + When she is doing it, she seems to be in the + <a class="pagenum" id="page52" title="52"> </a>grasp of some other mind, to be another person, + and her actions are involuntary, unconscious. + Then she seems to come to herself, + when her agony is dreadful to behold.”</p> + + <p>The young woman’s voice broke a little + here, she paused a moment to resume control + of herself, and perceiving her eyes swimming + with tears and her lips quivering with unhappiness, + Mr. Middleton was penetrated with pity + and pressed most tenderly and sympathetically + the delicate hand of which he was temporarily + custodian.</p> + + <p>“She took things in stores, trumpery, cheap + things. She took magazines and penny papers + from news stands. But oh, she descended to + the dreadful depths of—oh, I can hardly tell + it—she was detected in trying to pick a man’s + pocket. It is here that I wish to employ you + as an agent of restitution, or rather retribution, + I should say. Will you please take this ring + off my left hand and take it to the man she + tried to rob? I cannot use the fingers of my + right hand owing to temporary incapacitation,” + and she held out to Mr. Middleton her left + hand, upon the third finger of which gleamed a + splendid ring of diamonds and emeralds. Mr. + Middleton possessed himself of this second + <a class="pagenum" id="page53" title="53"> </a>hand, but paused, and regarding the sweet face + turned up to his so beseechingly, so piteously, + said:</p> + + <p>“But that would be compounding a felony. + And how do you know the man will not have + her arrested anyway?”</p> + + <p>“The man is a gentleman and having heard + her story, will not think of such a thing. You + are to ask him to accept the ring not as a price + for immunity from arrest, but as a punishment, + a retribution to Amy. The loss of the ring, + which she has commissioned me to get to this + gentleman in some manner, will be a lesson she + is only too anxious to give herself, a forcible + reminder, as it were. Let me beg of you to + undertake this commission.”</p> + + <p>All the while, Mr. Middleton was retaining + hold of both the hands of the sorrowful young + woman. Had they been other than the soft + and shapely hands they were, had they been + hard and gnarled and large, long before would + he, melted by compassion at the young woman’s + tale, have released her. But her very + charms had been her undoing and because of + her perfect hands, this tale has grown long. + That he might have excuse in the eyes of the + other passengers for holding the young woman’s + <a class="pagenum" id="page54" title="54"> </a>hand, Mr. Middleton removed the ring as he + had been bidden, planning to return it shortly. + As he removed the ring, he released the hand + in his pocket and his plan was frustrated by + the young woman starting up with the exclamation + that she had passed her corner, and + springing from the car. She was so far in + advance of him, when he succeeded in getting + off the car and was walking so rapidly, that he + could not overtake her except by running, and + he was averse to attracting the attention that + this would occasion. So he determined to + shadow her and ascertaining her residence, find + some means of restoring the ring without the + knowledge of her friends, as he had no desire + to do anything which might cause them to + learn of her unfortunate infirmity, especially, + as this last experience might have worked a + cure. She did indeed enter a stately mansion + of the Lake Shore Drive—but by the back + door.</p> + + <p>Pondering upon this episode, Mr. Middleton + went to an acquaintance who kept a large loan + bank on Madison Street, who, after discovering + that he had no desire to pawn the ring, + appraised it at seven hundred dollars.</p> + + <p>On the following evening, Mr. Middleton + <a class="pagenum" id="page55" title="55"> </a>was replacing his new suit by his old, as was + his custom when he intended to remain in his + room of an evening. This example cannot be + too highly commended to all young men. The + amount which would be saved in this nation + were all to economize in this way, would be + sufficient to buy beer for all the Teutonic citizens + of the large state of Illinois. As Mr. + Middleton was changing his clothes, the scarabæus + dropped from his pocket and as he + picked it up, a collar button fell from his neckband, + and scrambling for it as it rolled toward + the unexplored regions under his bed, he + tripped and sprawled at full length, his nose + coming in sharp contact with an evening paper + lying on the floor. He was about to rise from + his recumbent position, when his eyes, glancing + along his nose to discover if it had sustained + any injury, observed that said member + rested upon a notice which read:</p> + + <blockquote> + <p>“Lost, a diamond and emerald ring. $800 + will be paid for its return and no questions + asked. <span class="signature">David O. Crecelius.”</span></p> + </blockquote> + + <p style="clear:both;">The address was that of the house on the + Lake Shore Drive which the kleptomaniac + had entered! Once more did the scarabæus + seem to be exerting its influence. But for the + <a class="pagenum" id="page56" title="56"> </a>talisman, he would never have seen the notice, + and a little shiver ran through him as he + thought of this. Immediately he reclothed + himself in his new suit.</p> + + <p>“There is time for me to think out a course + of action between here and my destination,” + said he. “The walking so conducive to reflection + can be much better employed in taking + me toward the Lake Shore Drive, than in uselessly + pacing my room, and I’ll be there when + I get through.”</p> + + <p>As he traveled eastward, he engaged in a + series of ratiocinative processes and the result + of the deductive and inductive reasoning which + he applied to the case in hand, was as follows:</p> + + <p>The kleptomaniac could hardly be a daughter + of the house. She would have entered by the + front door. If she were the daughter of the + house, she would not have had the ring advertised + for, counting herself fortunate to get out + of the difficulty so cheaply. However, if her + parents had noted the absence of the ring, she + might have said it was lost and so they advertised, + but nothing could have been further + from her wishes, for there would be the great + danger that the outcome of the advertisement + would be a complete exposure. She could + <a class="pagenum" id="page57" title="57"> </a>easily prevent her parents noticing the ring was + gone, at least making satisfactory explanations + for not wearing it. With her wealth, she + could have it duplicated inside of a few days + and her friends never know the original was + lost. As this is what the daughter of the house + in all probability would have done, the kleptomaniac + could hardly have been the daughter of + the house. He suspected that she was a lady’s + maid, who, wearing her mistress’s jewelry, had + purchased her way out of one difficulty at the + risk of getting into another. The advertisement + would seem to indicate that she was + trusted. The disappearance of the ring was + apparently not connected with her. The matter + was very simple. He would hand over the + ring and take the eight hundred dollars and + need say nothing that would implicate the + young woman, be she daughter of the house + and kleptomaniac, or serving-maid and common + thief. But one thing puzzled him. Why + was the reward greater than the value of the + ring?</p> + + <p>Eight hundred dollars. The young lady in + Englewood was getting nearer.</p> + + <p>A bitter east wind was blowing as he walked + up to the entrance of the mansion of Mr. David + <a class="pagenum" id="page58" title="58"> </a>Crecelius. Behind him the street lay all deserted + and the melancholy voice of the waves + filled the air. Nowhere could he see a light + about the house and he was oppressed by a feeling + of undefinable apprehension as he pressed + the bell. A considerable interval elapsing without + any one appearing and a second and a + third ringing failing to elicit any response + from within the silent pile, he was about to + depart, feeling greatly relieved that it was not + necessary to hold parley with any one within + the gloomy and forbidding edifice, when he + heard a sudden light thud at his feet and discovered + that the scarabæus had dropped + through a hole in his trousers’ pocket which + had at that moment reached a size large enough + to allow it to escape. After a hurried search, + he had possessed himself of the talisman and + was about to depart, when the door swung + open before him and a venerable white-haired + man stood in a dim green glow. Boldly did + Mr. Middleton enter, for had not the talisman + delayed him until the venerable man + opened the door?</p> + + <p>“Come in, sir, come in,” said the venerable + man, whom Mr. Middleton saw was none other + than David O. Crecelius, the capitalist, whose + <a class="pagenum" id="page59" title="59"> </a>portraits he had seen again and again in the + Sunday papers and the weekly papers of a + moral and entertaining nature, accompanying + accounts of his life and achievements, with + exhortations to the youth of the land to imitate + them, advice which Mr. Middleton then + and there resolved to follow, reflecting upon + the impeccable sources from which it emanated.</p> + + <p>“All the servants seem to be gone. My + family is abroad and the household force has + been cut down, and I have given everybody + leave to go out to-night, all but one maid, and + she seems to have gone, too,” said Mr. Crecelius, + leading Mr. Middleton into a spacious + salon and seating him near where great portières + of a funereal purple moved uneasily in + the superheated atmosphere of the house. At + that moment, a voice from the hallway, a voice + he had surely heard before, said:</p> + + <p>“Did some one ring? I am very sorry, but + it was impossible for me to come,” and Mr. + Middleton was aware that some one was looking + hard at the back of his head.</p> + + <p>“Yes. I let them in. It’s no matter. Run + away now.”</p> + + <p>When Mr. Middleton had finished explaining + <a class="pagenum" id="page60" title="60"> </a>the reason for his call and had fished up + the ring, Mr. Crecelius did not, as he had + expected he would, arise and make out a check + for $800.</p> + + <p>“This ring,” said that gentleman after a + little pause, “have you it with you?”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton glanced at the hollow of his + left hand. He had fished up the scarabæus + instead of the ring. But his left thumb soon + showed him the ring was safe in his vest + pocket. The delay and caution of Mr. Crecelius, + and above all, the prevention of the + immediate delivery of the ring caused by the + scarabæus coming up in its stead caused Mr. + Middleton to delay.</p> + + <p>“It can be produced,” said he.</p> + + <p>“How did you get it?”</p> + + <p>“It came into my possession innocently + enough so far as I was concerned. As to the + person from whom I received it, that is a + different matter, but though I made no promises, + I feel I am in honor bound not to disclose + that person’s identity.”</p> + + <p>As he uttered these words, Mr. Middleton + saw the portière at his side rustle slightly. It + was not the swaying caused by the currents of + overheated air.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page61" title="61"> </a>“I will give you two hundred dollars more + to tell me who gave you or sold you the + ring.”</p> + + <p>“I cannot do that.”</p> + + <p>“Very well. I’ll only give you four hundred + dollars reward.”</p> + + <p>“The ring is worth more than that.”</p> + + <p>“If you retain it, or sell it, you become a + thief.”</p> + + <p>“You have advertised eight hundred dollars + reward and no questions asked. I may have + found it. Knowing of your loss through reading + your advertisement, I may have gone to + great trouble to recover it. At any rate, I + have it. I deliver it. Your advertisement is + in effect a contract which I can call upon you + to carry out. The ring is not mine, but for my + services in getting it, I am entitled to the eight + hundred dollars you agree to give. You cannot + give less.”</p> + + <p>“Do you think it right to take advantage of + my necessity in this way? You ought to + accept less. The ring is not worth over seven + hundred dollars. For returning it, three hundred + dollars ought to be enough. It is wrong + to drive a hard bargain by taking advantage of + my necessity.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page62" title="62"> </a>“You have built your fortune on such principles. + You have engineered countless schemes + and your dollars came from the straits you + reduced others to.”</p> + + <p>“But do you think it right? What I may + have done, does not justify you. I venture to + say you and other young chaps have sat with + heels cocked up and pipes in mouth and discussed + me and called me a villain for doing + what you are trying to do with me.”</p> + + <p>“I have indeed. But that was in the past + and I have changed my views materially. At + present, I have the exclusive possession of the + ability to secure something you very much + want. You offered eight hundred dollars. + Intrinsically, the ring is not worth it, but for + certain reasons, possession of the ring is worth + eight hundred dollars.”</p> + + <p>“Possession of the ring! Certain reasons!” + said Mr. Crecelius, springing to his feet and + pacing up and down the room angrily. As + Mr. Middleton was cudgelling his brains to find + some reason for this outburst of anger, he + became cognizant of a small piece of folded + paper lying near his feet. He was about to + pick it up and hand it to the financier, when he + was stayed by the reflection that it might have + <a class="pagenum" id="page63" title="63"> </a>dropped from his own pocket and examining + it, read:</p> + + <blockquote> + <p>“It’s his wife’s ring. I wore it along with + some of her other things. Ten years ago, he + gave it to another woman, and his wife found + it out and he had to buy it back. He is afraid + his wife will think he gave the ring away a + second time. That is why I dared give it to + you. Make him give you a thousand.</p> + <p class="signature2">“The One You Didn’t Give Away.”</p> + + + </blockquote> + + <p>Mr. Middleton put the note in his pocket, + and the eminent capitalist having ceased pacing + and standing gazing at him, he remarked:</p> + + <p>“Certain reasons, such as preventing an + altercation with your wife over her suspicions + that you had not lost the ring, but had disposed + of it as on a former occasion ten years + since.”</p> + + <p>“Young man, you cannot blackmail me. + My wife knows all about that. The knowledge + of that occurrence is worthless as a piece + of blackmail.”</p> + + <p>“As blackmail, yes; but not worthless as an + indication of the extent you desire to regain + possession of the ring. Your wife knows of + your former escapade and that is gone and + <a class="pagenum" id="page64" title="64"> </a>past. But the present disappearance of the + ring will cause her to think you have repeated + the escapade. This knowledge of certain conditions + causes me to see that my services in + securing and delivering the ring are worth one + thousand dollars. Upon the payment of that + sum, cash, I hand you the ring.”</p> + + <p>The distinguished money-king gave Mr. + Middleton a very black look and then left the + room to return almost immediately with a + thousand dollars in bills, which Mr. Middleton + counted, placed in his vest pocket, and forthwith + delivered the ring. As he did so, yielding + to the pride with which the successful outcome + of his tilt with the great capitalist inflamed + him, he remarked with a condescension + which the suavity of his tones could not conceal:</p> + + <p>“Had you, sir, employed in this affair the + perspicacity you have displayed on so many + notable occasions, it would have occurred to + you that this ring, being of a common pattern, + could be duplicated for seven hundred dollars + and so you be saved both money and + worry.”</p> + + <p>A look of admiration overspread the face of + the eminent manipulator, and grasping Mr. + <a class="pagenum" id="page65" title="65"> </a>Middleton’s hand with great fervor, he exclaimed:</p> + + <p>“A man after my own heart. I am always + ready to acknowledge a defeat. You have + good stuff in you. I must know you better. + You must stay and have a glass of champagne + with me. I will get it myself,” and he hurried + out of the room.</p> + + <p>In the state of Wisconsin, from which Mr. + Middleton hailed, there is a great deal of the + alcoholic beverage, beer, but such champagne + as is to be found there is all due to importation, + since it is not native to the soil, but is + brought in at great expense from France, La + Belle France, and New Jersey, La Belle New + Jersey. Mr. Middleton had seen, smelled, and + tasted beer, but champagne was unknown to + him save by hearsay, and his improper curiosity + and his readiness to succumb to temptation + caused him to linger in the salon of + Mr. Crecelius, thereby nearly accomplishing + his ruin. Suddenly there was a patter of + light steps across the floor, a hand fell lightly + on his shoulder and a voice lightly on his + ear.</p> + + <p>“You made him raving mad when you said + what you did. He telephoned the police. + <a class="pagenum" id="page66" title="66"> </a>Now he has gone for the wine and will try to + hold you until they come.”</p> + + <p>“But he cannot arrest me. I have done + nothing,” said Mr. Middleton, his heart going + pit-a-pat, in spite of the boldness of his words.</p> + + <p>“He can make all sorts of trouble for you. + Even if you did come out all right in the end, + think of the trouble. Come, come quick!”</p> + + <p>A soft hand had grasped one of his and he + was up and away, following his fair guide up + stairs, through the house, and down into the + kitchen.</p> + + <p>“I have recovered my wits a bit,” said Mr. + Middleton. “He is so angry that he has no + thought but immediate vengeance, and so + accordingly telephones the police, and if they + were to catch me here, it certainly would be + bad. But to-morrow he will be in a mood to + appreciate the good sense of the letter I shall + send him, calling his attention to the fact that + if he arrests me, in the trial there must come + out the reason why I demanded one thousand + dollars, the story of his domestic indiscretion, + and so he will not think of pursuing the matter + further.”</p> + + <p>“It was very kind and very noble of you not + to expose me,” said the young woman in a + <a class="pagenum" id="page67" title="67"> </a>voice in which gratitude and sadness were + mingled; “and all the admiration and gratitude + a woman can feel under such circumstances, I + feel toward you. To you I owe my continued + good name and even my very freedom. I + know that marriage with such as you, is not + for such as me. I am going to ask you to give + to her who would have all, but expects and + deserves nothing, the consolation of a kiss. + Whatever happy maiden may be so fortunate + as to receive your love, I shall have treasured + in memory the golden remembrance that once + my preserver bestowed on me the symbol of + love.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton looked down at the girl, supplicating + for the favor her sex is wont to deny, + and he said to himself that seldom had he seen + a more flower-like face. Her lovely lips were + already puckered in a rosy pout, her hands + raised ready to rest on his shoulders as he + should encircle her with his arms, when he + noted with a start that her eyes, snapping, + alert, and eager, were bent not upon his face, + but upon his upper left hand vest pocket, + where bulged the one thousand dollars in bills.</p> + + <p>“I am more than honored and I shall be + ravished with delight to comply. But here, + <a class="pagenum" id="page68" title="68"> </a>where we stand, we are exposed to view from + three sides. If Mr. Crecelius were to look in + and see you being kissed by me, whom he so + dislikes, in what a bad plight you would be. + Not even for the exquisite pleasure of kissing + you would I subject you to such a danger. But + in the shadow by the outer door, we would not + be seen.”</p> + + <p>As he said these words, Mr. Middleton + placed the money in his inside vest pocket, + buttoned his vest, buttoned his inner coat, and + buttoned his overcoat, moving toward the outer + door as he did so, the young woman following + him more and more slowly, the light in her + eyes dying with each successive buttoning. In + fact, she did not enter into the shadow at all, + and Mr. Middleton stepped back a bit when he + threw his arms about her and pressed her to his + bosom. Perfunctorily and coldly did she yield + to his embrace, but whatever ardor was lacking + on her part, was compensated for by Mr. Middleton, + who clasped her with exceeding tightness + and showered kisses upon her pouting lips + until she pushed him from her, exclaiming with + annoyance:</p> + + <p>“You’ve kissed me quite enough, you great + big softy.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page69" title="69"> </a>Mr. Middleton said nothing of these transactions + when on the ensuing evening he sat in the + presence of the young lady of Englewood, nor + did he, when on the evening thereafter he once + more sat in the presence of the urbane prince + of the tribe of Al-Yam. Having handed him a + bowl of delicately flavored sherbet, Achmed + began to narrate The Adventure of Nora Sullivan + and the Student of Heredity.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_6" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page70" title="70"> </a>The Adventure of Norah Sullivan and the Student of Heredity.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">It was</span> the time of full moon. As the + orb of day dropped its red, huge disk + below the western horizon, over the + opposite side of the world, the moon, + even more huge and scarcely less red, rose to + irradiate with its mild beams the scenes which + the shadows of darkness had not yet touched. + Miss Nora Sullivan, a teacher in the public + schools of the metropolis, sat upon the front + porch of the paternal residence enjoying the + loveliness of the vernal prospect and the balm + of the air, for it was in the flowery month of + June. Although the residence of Timothy + Sullivan was well within the limits of the + municipality of Chicago, one visiting at that + hospitable abode might imagine himself in the + country. From no part of the enclosure + could you, during the leafy season, see another + human habitation. A quarter of a mile down + the road to the east, the electric cars for Calumet + could be seen flitting by, but except at the + intervals of their passing, there was seldom + <a class="pagenum" id="page71" title="71"> </a>anything to suggest that the location was part + of a great city. A quarter of a mile to the + west, on the edge of a marsh—a situation well + suited to such culture—lived a person engaged + in the raising of African geese. As it is + probable that you may never have heard of + African geese, I will tell you that they are the + largest of their tribe and that specimens of + them often weigh as high as seventy pounds.</p> + + <p>The person engaged in the culture of African + geese was Wilhelm Klingenspiel, a man of + German ancestry, but born in this country. + Miss Sullivan had often heard of him, she had + even partaken of the left leg of an African + goose, which leg he had given Mr. Sullivan + for the Sunday dinner, but she had never + seen him. As Wilhelm Klingenspiel was + young and single and as no other man of any + description lived in the vicinity, it is not + strange that Nora, who was also young and + single, should sometimes fall to thinking of + Mr. Klingenspiel and wonder what manner of + man he was.</p> + + <p>On this evening so attuned to romantic + reveries, when the flowers, the birds, and all + nature spoke of love, more than ever did Nora + Sullivan’s thoughts turn toward the large grove + <a class="pagenum" id="page72" title="72"> </a>of trees to the westward in the midst of which + Wilhelm Klingenspiel had his home and carried + on his pleasant and harmless vocation of + raising African geese. The evening song of + the geese, tempered and sweetened by distance, + came to her, accompanied by the most + extraordinary booming and racketing of frogs + which is to be heard outside of the tropical + zone; for not only did Klingenspiel raise the + largest geese on this terraqueous globe, but + having, as a means of cheapening the cost of + their production, devoted himself to the increasing + of their natural food, by principles + well known to all breeders he had developed a + breed of frogs as monstrous among their kind + as African geese are among theirs. By these + huge batrachians was an extensive marsh inhabited, + and battening upon the succulent + nutriment thus afforded, the African geese + gained a size and flavor which was rapidly + making the fortune of Wilhelm Klingenspiel.</p> + + <p>Nora had often meditated upon plans for + making the acquaintance of Wilhelm, but it + was plain that he was either very bashful or so + immersed in his pursuits as to be indifferent + to the charms of woman, for he had never + made an attempt to see Nora in all the six + <a class="pagenum" id="page73" title="73"> </a>months she had been his neighbor, and she + was well worth seeing.</p> + + <p>Accordingly, she decided that if she did not + wish to indefinitely postpone making the + acquaintance of the poulterer, she must take + the initiative. Timothy Sullivan was a market + gardener. Klingenspiel was not the only man + in the neighborhood who grew big things. + Mr. Sullivan was experimenting upon some + cabbages of unusual size. He had started + them in a hothouse during the winter. Later + transferred to the garden, they had attained + an amplitude such as few if any cabbages had + ever attained before. In the pleasant light of + the moon, even now was he engaged with the + cabbages, pouring something upon them from + a watering pot. As she watched her father, + it occurred to Nora that she could find no + more suitable excuse for visiting Mr. Klingenspiel + than in carrying him some present in + return for the goose’s left leg he had presented + her family for a Sunday dinner, and + that there was no more appropriate present + than one of the great cabbages.</p> + + <p>No sooner had her father gone in than, + selecting the largest cabbage, she started off + with it, putting it in a small push-cart, as it + <a class="pagenum" id="page74" title="74"> </a>was so large as to be too heavy and inconvenient + to carry. It was somewhat late to + call, but the evening was so delightful that + Wilhelm Klingenspiel could hardly have gone + to bed. Proceeding on her way, as the road + passed into the swampy land of Klingenspiel’s + domain, her attention was engaged by the fact + that a most singular commotion was taking + place among the giant batrachians at some + remote place south of the road. Their ordinary + calls had increased both in volume and + frequency, and at intervals she heard the + sound of crashing in the brake and brush, as if + some objects of unheard of size were falling + into the marsh. Looking in the direction + whence the sounds came, she saw indistinct + and vague against the night sky, an enormous + rounded thing rise in the air and descend, + whereupon was borne to her another of the + strange crashings. These inexplicable sounds + and the inexplicable sight would have frightened + Miss Sullivan had she not the resources + with which modern science fortifies the mind + against credulity and superstition. The round + object, she told herself, was some sudden puff + of smoke on a railway track far beyond; the + crashing was the shunting of cars, which + <a class="pagenum" id="page75" title="75"> </a>things, coming coincidentally with a battle of + the frogs, to an ignorant mind would appear + to be a phenomenon in the immediate vicinity. + Bearing in mind that this seemingly real, but + impossible, phenomenon could only be due to a + fortuitous concatenation of actual occurrences, + Nora was not disturbed in her mind. + Leaving her cart some little distance up the + road, in order that she might not be seen in + the undignified position of pushing it, she + walked into Klingenspiel’s front yard, bearing + her gift.</p> + + <p>The two-story white house of Wilhelm + Klingenspiel seemed to be deserted. Despite + the genial season, every door was shut, and so + was every window, so far as Nora could see, + for if any windows were open down stairs, at + least the blinds were shut. There were no + blinds in the second story. Looking around + in no little disappointment, she was astonished + to see a row of sheds and fences in rear of the + house had been demolished as if struck by a + cyclone and that a goodly sized barn had departed + from its normal position and with frame + intact was lying on its side like a toy barn tipped + over by a child. As she was gazing upon this + ruinage and striving to conjecture what had + <a class="pagenum" id="page76" title="76"> </a>caused it, she heard a voice, muffled and + strange, yet distinctly audible, saying:</p> + + <p>“Ribot is running amuck, Ribot is running + amuck,” and looking up she beheld, darkly + visible against the panes of an upper story + window, a human form. As she looked, the + form disappeared and presently a person + rushed from the front door, hauled her into the + house and upstairs, where she found herself + still holding her cabbage and observing a short + man of a full habit, with a round moon face, + illuminated by a large pair of spectacles that + sustained themselves with difficulty upon a + very snub nose. He was nearly bald, yet + nevertheless of a kindly, studious, and astute + appearance. One did not need to look twice + to see that Wilhelm Klingenspiel was a + scholar.</p> + + <p>“What—what—what is the matter?” + exclaimed Nora.</p> + + <p>“Ribot is running amuck.”</p> + + <p>“Who is Ribot?”</p> + + <p>Klingenspiel was about to answer, when the + whole air was filled with what one would have + called a squeal if it had been one fiftieth part + so loud, and over a row of willow bushes across + the road leapt an astounding great creature, + <a class="pagenum" id="page77" title="77"> </a>twice as large as the largest elephant, and Nora + began to realize that her scientific deductions + regarding the phenomenon in the swamp had + been utterly erroneous. The creature was of + an oblong build, rounded in contour, and its + hide was marked by large blotches of black + and rufous yellow upon a ground of white. + With extreme swiftness the creature scurried + down the road, its legs being so short in proportion + to its body and moving with such + twinkling rapidity that it seemed to be propelled + upon wheels. The appearance of this + strange monster and the appalling character of + its squealing, caused Nora to tremble like a + leaf, but the animal having departed, a laudable + curiosity made her forget her fears, and + she asked:</p> + + <p>“What is it?”</p> + + <p>“That was Ribot.”</p> + + <p>“Who and what is Ribot?”</p> + + <p>“Ribot was a celebrated French scientist, an + authority on the subject of heredity. You + doubtless know something of the subject, how + certain traits appear in families generation + after generation. Accidental traits, if repeated + for two or three generations, often become + inherent traits. To show you to what a strange + <a class="pagenum" id="page78" title="78"> </a>extent this is true, I will call your attention to + the case of the ducal house of Bethune in + France, where three successive generations having + had the left hand cut off at the wrist in + battle, the next three generations were born + without a left hand.”</p> + + <p>The erudite dissertation of Wilhelm Klingenspiel + was here interrupted by the reappearance + of the mottled monster, who, with a scream + that filled the blue vault of heaven, rushed into + the yard and paused before a mighty oak, + whose sturdy trunk had stood rooted in that + soil before the city of Chicago existed, before + the United States was born, when Cahokia was + the capital of Illinois and the flag of France + waved over the great West. The flash of terrible + white teeth showed in the moonlight as + the monster gnawed at the base of the tree a + few times and with a crash its leafy length lay + upon the ground. Contemplating for a brief + space the ruin it had wrought, the monster + emitted another of its appalling screams and + was off once more on its erratic, aimless + course.</p> + + <p>“What in the world is this awful creature?” + cried Nora.</p> + + <p>“The subject of heredity,” resumed Klingenspiel, + <a class="pagenum" id="page79" title="79"> </a>“is one of vast importance, and + although its principles are well understood, + man has hitherto not touched the possibilities + that can be accomplished. The span of a + man’s life is so short that in selecting and + breeding choice strains of animals, an individual + can see only a comparatively small + number of generations succeed each other. + Suppose some one family had for two hundred + years carried on continuous experiments in + breeding any race of animals. What remarkable + results would have been attained! Behold + what remarkable results are attained in raising + varieties of plants, where the swiftness of succeeding + generations enables man to accomplish + what he seeks in a very short time. Observing + the difficulties that confront the animal + breeder and wishing to see in my own lifetime + certain results that might ordinarily be expected + only in a duration of several lifetimes, + I sought an animal which came to maturity + rapidly, whose generations succeeded each + rapidly. At the same time, I wanted an animal + comparatively highly organized, a mammal, + not a reptile.”</p> + + <p>At this point, his instructive discourse was + interrupted by the reappearance of the monster, + <a class="pagenum" id="page80" title="80"> </a>which charged into the yard with its nose + to the ground, following some scent, sniffing + so loudly that the sound was plainly audible + despite the closed window. After having + hastened about the yard for a few moments it + was off up the road to the eastward, still with + nose to the ground, until coming to the push + cart left at the roadside by Nora, it examined + it carefully and then with a sudden access of + unaccountable rage, fell upon it and demolished + it, beating and chewing it into bits.</p> + + <p>Whatever celerity this terrible beast had + exhibited before, was now completely eclipsed, + as with nose to the ground, it rushed back to + the yard, straight to the house, and rearing on + its hinder quarters, placed its forelegs on the + porch roof, which gave way beneath the ponderous + weight. Not disconcerted by the removal + of this support, the monster continued + to maintain its sitting posture, looking in the + window at the terrified persons beyond, snapping + and gnashing its huge jaws in a manner + terrible to hear and still more terrible to contemplate. + Nora was partially reassured by + observing that the animal’s head was too wide + to go through the window, but the hopes thus + raised were dashed by Klingenspiel moaning:</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page81" title="81"> </a>“He’ll gnaw right through the house, he’ll + chew right through the roof. He’ll get in. + He has smelled that big cabbage and he’ll get + in.”</p> + + <p>“In that case,” remarked Nora, with decision, + “I’ll not wait for him to come in to get + the cabbage, but throw it out to him,” and + raising the window, thrust out the cabbage, + which having caught with a deftness unexpected + in a creature of its bulk, the beast + retired a short space and proceeded to eat + with every appearance of enjoyment.</p> + + <p>“In Paris, a few years ago,” resumed Klingenspiel, + “one of the learned faculty that lend + a well deserved renown to the medical department + of that ancient institution, the University + of Paris, discovered an elixir which used during + the period of human growth—and even after—causes + the stature to increase. By depositing + an increased supply of the matter necessary to + the formation of bones, the frame increases and + the fleshy covering grows with it. You have + doubtless read of this in the papers, as I have + seen it mentioned there recently myself——”</p> + + <p>“I beg your pardon,” interrupted Nora, + “but I must know what that monster is. + Please do not keep me in suspense any longer.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page82" title="82"> </a>“Allow me to develop my discourse in its + natural sequence,” said Klingenspiel. “I + learned of this elixir at the time its originator + first formulated it and as we were friends, I + secured from him the formula——”</p> + + <p>“What is that animal?” cried Nora, seizing + Klingenspiel’s ear with a dexterity born of long + experience in educational work, and lifting + him slowly toward a position upon the points + of his toes.</p> + + <p>“A guinea pig, a guinea pig, a guinea pig,” + howled the student of heredity.</p> + + <p>“You guinea, you,” exclaimed Nora in + incredulous amazement, and yet as she looked + at the monster, which having finished the cabbage + was crouching contentedly between two + huge elms, she was struck by the familiarity of + the markings and contour of the tremendous + brute. Turning in such wise that of the + appendices of his countenance it should be his + short and elusive nose instead of his ears presented + toward the grasp of the expert in the + science of pedagogy, Klingenspiel continued.</p> + + <p>“Generations of guinea pigs succeed each + other in less than three months. In less than + ten months, a pair of guinea pigs become + great-grandfather and great-grandmother. In + <a class="pagenum" id="page83" title="83"> </a>a few years, heredity could here do what a + century of breeding horses could not. I + treated a pair of young guinea pigs with the + elixir. Their growth was wonderful. Their + children inherited the size of their parents and + to this the elixir added, and so on, cumulatively, + for successive generations. I kept only + a single pair out of each brood and disposed of + that pair as soon as the next generation became + grown. I did this partly because I could thus + conduct my experiment with greater secrecy. + Besides, after the guinea pigs were large + enough, I found considerable profit in selling + their hides for leather. Unfortunately, the + animal is unfit for food. My labors, therefore, + were bent upon creating a breed of draught + animals, creatures greater than elephants and + with the agility of guinea pigs. A team of + these guinea pigs would outstrip the fastest + horse, though hauling a load of tons. The + hide, too, would be extremely valuable. I had + at last reached a size beyond which I did not + care to go. Ribot and his mate were twice the + bulk of elephants. I was now ready to establish + a herd. But alas! Two days ago, the + mate died. All my labors were for nothing. + I had only the one enormous male left. All + <a class="pagenum" id="page84" title="84"> </a>the connecting links between him and the first + small ancestors are gone. But worse. As is + often the case with male elephants when the + mate dies, Ribot went mad, ran amuck. + Hitherto docile and kind, as is the nature of + the <em lang="la" xml:lang="la">Cavia cobaya</em>, vulgarly called guinea pig, + this evening Ribot became as you have seen + him. I have lost my labors. Momentarily I + expect to lose my life.”</p> + + <p>“What’s the matter with it now? Look at + it, look at it,” exclaimed Nora.</p> + + <p>Ribot had rolled on his back and after giving + a few feeble twitches of his great legs, remained + without life, his legs pointing stiffly + into the air.</p> + + <p>“He is dead,” said Klingenspiel, and Nora + was unable to tell whether relief and joy or + regret and despair predominated in this utterance. + “Ribot is dead. Our lives are saved, + my experiment is ruined.”</p> + + <p>Turning toward Nora and scrutinizing her + attentively for the first time, he remarked, + “How white your face is. The strain has + been a dreadful one. It has driven all the + color away from you.” And then letting his + eyes wander over her person until they paused + upon her hands resting in the moonlight upon + <a class="pagenum" id="page85" title="85"> </a>the top of the sash, “and how green your + hands are. What can it be? Paris green,” + he said after a close examination. “It was + that which killed Ribot.”</p> + + <p>“I remember now. Father was sprinkling + something on them. It is cabbage worm + time.”</p> + + <p>“I hope you will allow me to call,” said + Klingenspiel, and Nora graciously assenting, + he continued: “I admire your beauty, I admire + your many admirable qualities of head and + heart, but above all, your decision, your great + decision.”</p> + + <p>“Oh, I don’t think I showed much decision + just because I threw the cabbage out.”</p> + + <p>“I referred to your taking my ear and learning, + out of its due order in the thesis I was + expounding, what manner of beast Ribot was. + Ribot killed two of my best African geese. + They are, however, still fit for food. I am + going to beg your acceptance of one.”</p> + + <p>“We will have it for dinner to-morrow,” + said Nora, “and you must come over.”</p> + + <p>“I shall be pleased to do so,” said Klingenspiel, + and that was the beginning of a series of + visits to the home of Timothy Sullivan that + resulted in the marriage of Miss Nora and + <a class="pagenum" id="page86" title="86"> </a>Wilhelm Klingenspiel. The latter still raises + African geese there in the vicinity of Stony + Island, but he has made no more experiments + with guinea pigs, for his wife will not hear + to it.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_7" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page87" title="87"> </a>What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Fourth Gift of the Emir.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">“What</span> an unpleasant surprise it must + have been to Klingenspiel,” remarked + the emir, when he had completed + his narration, “to find all his + fine experimenting in the science of heredity + merely resulting in nearly accomplishing his + own death.”</p> + + <p>“His experience is not unique,” said Mr. + Middleton. “There is many an economic, + social, political, or industrial change which is + inaugurated with the highest hopes only to + slay its author in the end.”</p> + + <p>“We should indeed be careful what waves + we set in motion, what forces we liberate,” + said the emir thoughtfully. “And I have + been, too. I have in my possession a constant + reminder to be cautious in all my enterprises + and undertakings—a monitor forever bidding + me think of the consequences of an action, weigh + its possible results. It has been in my family + for generations. I believe that our house has + learned the lesson. I would be glad to give it + <a class="pagenum" id="page88" title="88"> </a>to some one who, perchance, has not. If it so + happens that you are in no need of such a + warning, you can perhaps present it to some + one else who is.” And having said a few words + to Mesrour in the language of Arabia, the + blackamore brought to him a small case and, + from the midst of wrappings of dark green + silk, he produced a flask of burnished copper + that shone with the utmost brilliance. Handing + this to Mr. Middleton and that gentleman + viewing it in silence for some time and exhibiting + no other emotion than a mild curiosity, + largely due to its great weight, a ponderosity + altogether out of proportion to its size, the + emir exclaimed in a loud voice:</p> + + <p>“Do you know what you are holding?” and + without waiting for an answer from his startled + guest, continued: “Observe the inscription + upon the side and the stamp of a signet set + upon the seal that closes the mouth.”</p> + + <p>“I perceive a number of Arabic characters,” + said Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“Arabic!” said the emir. “Hebrew. You + are looking upon the seal of the great Solomon + himself and that is the prison house of + one of the two evil genii whom the great king + confined in bottles and cast into the sea. In + <a class="pagenum" id="page89" title="89"> </a>that collection of chronicles which the Feringhis + style the Arabian Nights, you have read of the + fisherman who found a bottle in his net and + opened it to see a quantity of dark vapor issue + forth, which, assuming great proportions, presently + took form, coalesced into the gigantic + figure of a terrible genii, who announced to his + terrified liberator that during his captivity, he + had sworn to kill whomsoever let him out of + the bottle. This well-known occurrence and + stock example of the necessity of being careful + of the possible results of one’s acts, is so + familiar to you as to make its further relation + an impertinence on my part. Suffice it to say, + in cause you have forgotten a minor detail, + there was another genii and another bottle in + the sea beside the one found by the fisherman.</p> + + <p>“The second bottle in some unknown way + came into the possession of Prince Houssein, + brother of my great-grandfather’s great-grandfather, + Nourreddin. This latter prince having + need of a certain amount of coin—which was + very scarce in Arabia at that time and of great + purchasing power, trade being carried on by + barter—sent to his brother a request for a + loan. The country was in a very disturbed + <a class="pagenum" id="page90" title="90"> </a>state at that time and Houssein dispatched two + messengers at an interval of a day apart. The + first of these was robbed and killed. He bore + a letter, concealed in his saddle, and the + money. The second messenger came in entire + safety with that bottle, for no one could be + desirous of trifling with anything so fraught + with danger as that prison house of the terrible + genii. What was the purport of this strange + gift has never been guessed. The letter borne + by the murdered man doubtless explained. + Houssein himself perished of plague before + Nourreddin could learn from him.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton sat holding the enchanted + bottle very gingerly. If he had not feared to + give offence to the emir, he would have declined + the gift, for while not for one moment + did he dream that a demoniac presence fretted + inside that shining copper, he did believe + that it contained some explosive, or what + would be more probable, some mephitic substance + that gave off a deadly vapor. So, fully + resolved to throw the bottle into the river and + being very heedful of Achmed’s injunction not + to let the leaden plug bearing Solomon’s seal + be removed from the mouth, he placed the gift + in his pocket and having thanked the emir for + <a class="pagenum" id="page91" title="91"> </a>his entertainment and instruction and the gift, + he departed.</p> + + <p>When Mr. Middleton had stepped into the + street, he altered his resolution to immediately + dispose of the bottle. He was tired and did + not care to walk to the river. Nor did he wish + to ride there and alight, spending two car fares + to get home. So postponing until the morrow + the casting into the Chicago River of the + unhappy genii who had once reposed on the + bottom of the Persian Gulf, he boarded a car + for home.</p> + + <p>The bulk and weight of the bottle sagging + down his pocket and threatening to injure the + set of his coat, Mr. Middleton held his acquisition + on his knee. A tall, serious-looking + individual was his seat mate, who after regarding + the bottle intently for some time, addressed + him in a low, but earnest voice.</p> + + <p>“Pray pardon my curiosity, but I am going + to ask you what that queer receptacle is.”</p> + + <p>“It is the prison-house of a wicked genii, + who was shut therein by King Solomon, the + magic influence of whose seal on the plug in the + mouth retains him within, for what resistance + could the physical force of those copper walls + oppose to the strength of that mighty demon?”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page92" title="92"> </a>Of these words did Mr. Middleton deliver + himself, though he knew they must sound + passing strange, but on the spur of the moment + he could not think what else to say and he + hoped that the belief he would create that his + mind was affected would relieve him of further + questioning, for if put to it and pinned down, + what could he say, what plausible account + could he give of the bottle? To his surprise, + the stranger gave no evidence of other than a + complete acceptance of his statement and continuing + to make inquiries in a most respectful + and courteous way, Mr. Middleton felt he + could not be less mannerly himself, and so he + related all he knew of the bottle, avowing his + belief that it contained some dangerous chemical, + such as that devilish corroding stuff known + as Greek fire, or some deadly gas.</p> + + <p>“Your theory sounds reasonable,” said the + stranger; “and yet who knows? That inscription + certainly is Hebrew. At least, it is + neither English nor German. When one has + studied psychic phenomena as long as I have, + he comes to a point where he is very chary of + saying what is not credible. Do I not, time + and again, materialize the dead, calling from + the winds, the waters, and the earth the dispersed + <a class="pagenum" id="page93" title="93"> </a>particles of the corporeal frame to reclothe + for a little time the spiritual essence? + Could not the great Solomon do as much? Is + it not possible that that great moral ensamplar, + guide, saint, and prophet has imprisoned in + that bottle some one of the Pre-Adamite + demons? I am not afraid to open the bottle, + on the contrary, would be glad to do so. I am + a clairvoyant and trance-medium, with materialization + as a specialty. My name is Jefferson + P. Smitz. Here is my card. I have a + seance to-morrow night. Bring your bottle + then, and I will open it. The price of admission + is,” he said, with a glance of tentative + scrutiny, “one dollar,” at which information + Mr. Middleton, looking unresponsive, uninterested, + not to say sulky, he continued: “but as + you will bring such an important and interesting + contribution to the subject of inquiry for + the evening, we will make the admission for + you only fifty cents, fifty cents.”</p> + + <p>On the following evening, Mr. Middleton + and his bottle sat among a circle of some thirty + persons who were gathered in the gloomy, + lofty-ceiled parlor of Mr. Smitz. Before forming + the circle, Mr. Smitz had addressed the + company in a few well-chosen words, saying + <a class="pagenum" id="page94" title="94"> </a>that a like purpose had brought all there that + night, that as votaries of science and devotees + of truth and persons of culture and refinement, + mutual acquaintance could not but be pleasant + as well as helpful, enabling those who sat + together while witnessing the astounding and + edifying phenomena they were soon to behold, + to discuss these phenomena with reciprocal + benefit—in view of all this, he hoped everybody + would consider themselves introduced to + everybody else.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton, quickly inspecting the assemblage, + whom he doubtless with great injustice + denominated a crowd of sober dubs and + solemn stiffs, so maneuvered that when all had + drawn their chairs into a circle, a man deaf in + the right ear sat at his left, while at his right + sat a tall young lady, who though slightly pale + was of an interesting appearance, notwithstanding. + The somewhat tragic cast of her + large and classic features was intensified by a + pair of great mournful eyes and a wistful + mouth, the whole framed in luxuriant masses + of black hair, and altogether she was a girl + whom one would give a second and third + glance anywhere.</p> + + <p>It developing in their very first exchange of + <a class="pagenum" id="page95" title="95"> </a>remarks that she had never been present at a + seance and that she could not look forward to + what they were about to witness without great + trepidation, Mr. Middleton offered to afford + her every moral support and such physical protection + as one mortal can assure another when + facing the unknown powers of another world. + At the extinguishment of the gas, he took her + left hand, and finding it give a faint tremor, + he took the other and was pleased to note that, + so far as her hands gave evidence, thereupon + her fears were quite allayed.</p> + + <p>A breeze, chill and dank as the breath of a + tomb, blew upon the company, and from the + deep darkness into which they all stared with + straining, unseeing eyes, came the solemn + sound of Mr. Smitz, speaking hurriedly in somber + tones in some sonorous unknown tongue, + and low rustlings and whirrs and soft footfalls + and faint rattlings that grew stronger, louder, + each moment, swelling up into the stamp of a + mailed heel and the clangor of arms as Mr. + Smitz scratched a match and the light of a gas + jet glanced upon helmet, corslet, shield, and + greaves of a brazen-armored Greek warrior, + standing in the middle of the circle, alive, in + full corporeal presence!</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page96" title="96"> </a>“Leonidas, hero of Thermopylæ!” shouted + Mr. Smitz, and then continued at a conversational + pitch, “if any of you wish to speak to + him in his own language, you have full permission + to do so.”</p> + + <p>Those present lacking either the desire to + accost the dread presence, or a command of + the ancient Greek, after a bit Mr. Smitz turned + off the gas and the noises that had heralded the + visitant’s appearance began in reverse order, + and at their cease, the gas being turned on + again, there was the circle quite bare of any + evidence that a Greek warrior in full panoply + had but now stood there.</p> + + <p>At these prodigies, the young lady trembled, + but you could have applied all sorts of + surgical devices for measuring nerve reaction + to Mr. Middleton from the crown of his head + to where his parallel feet held between them + the copper bottle, and not have detected a + tremor.</p> + + <p>Mr. Smitz was reaching up to extinguish the + gas once more, when a big, athletic blonde + man, whose appearance and garb proclaimed + him an Englishman, interrupted him.</p> + + <p>“I am going to request you to materialize + the spirit with whom I wish to converse, the + <a class="pagenum" id="page97" title="97"> </a>next time. I have to catch a train at eleven + and there are a number of things I would like + to do before that. Yesterday, you promised + me that you would materialize him first + thing.”</p> + + <p>“Yesterday,” said Mr. Smitz with a slight + hauteur, “I could not look forward and see + that I was to have such a large and cultivated + gathering. You cannot, sir, ask to have your + own mere personal business, for business it is + with you, take precedence of the scientific + quests of all these other ladies and gentlemen. + I have planned to materialize men of many + nations, with whom all may converse if they + please; Confucius, the great Chinese; Cæsar, + the great Roman; Mohammed, the great Turk; + Powhattan, the great Indian, and others. + Your business must wait.”</p> + + <p>“My friends,” said the Englishman, appealing + to the assemblage, “I throw myself upon + your good nature. My grandfather was the + owner of a small estate in Ireland. In a rebellion, + the Irish burned every building on the + place and it has since been deserted. He had + buried a sum of money before he fled during + the rebellion and we have a chart telling where + it was buried. But the chart referred to buildings + <a class="pagenum" id="page98" title="98"> </a>and trees that were subsequently utterly + destroyed. We have no marks to guide us. I + am sadly in need of money. My grandfather’s + ghost could tell me where the treasure is. I + shall suffer financial detriment if I do not catch + the train at eleven and must attend to several matters + before that. You have heard my case. + May I not ask you all to grant me the indulgence + of having my affair disposed of now?”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton and several others were about + to endorse the justice of the Englishman’s + request, when Mr. Smitz hastily forestalled + them by saying that all should be heard from + and turning to four personages who sat together + at a point where the line of chairs of + the circle passed before a large and mysterious + cabinet set in the corner of the wall, and asking + their opinion, they all four in one voice + began to object to any alteration of the program + of the evening, adverting somewhat to + the Boer War, the oppressions in Ireland, and + to the Revolution and the War of 1812. When + they had done, there was no one who cared to + say a word for the Englishman or an Englishman, + and Mr. Smitz announced that Confucius + would be the next materialization and that all + might address him in his native tongue. Of + <a class="pagenum" id="page99" title="99"> </a>this permission, a small red-head gentleman, + whose demeanor advertised him to be in a + somewhat advanced state of intoxication, + availed himself and remarked slowly:</p> + + <p>“Hello, John. Washee, washee? Sabe + how washee? Wlanter be Melican man?”</p> + + <p>To this the great sage vouchsafed no reply + save a contemptuous stare, and the red-headed + gentleman observed that doubtless the Chinese + language had changed a good deal in two thousand + years. All languages did.</p> + + <p>From out the darkness under whose cover + the Chinaman was modestly divesting himself + of his body, came the voice of Mr. Smitz, rich, + unctuous, saying:</p> + + <p>“The next visitant will be from that great + race we all admire so much, the noble race + which has done so much to build up this + country, which in every field of American + endeavor has been a guiding star to us all. It + gives me great pleasure to tell you that our + next visitant from the world beyond is that + great soldier, statesman, and patriot, King + Brian Boru.”</p> + + <p>“Who the devil wants to see that or any + other paddy?” exclaimed the voice of the + Englishman, choleric, savage. “Let me out + <a class="pagenum" id="page100" title="100"> </a>of this blarsted, cheating hole. Who wants to + see one of that race of quarrelsome, thieving, + wretched rapscallions?”</p> + + <p>Whack! Smash! Bang! Crash! The + assemblage was thrown into a pitiable state + of terror by a most extraordinary combat and + tumult taking place somewhere in the circle. + The remonstrances of Mr. Smitz and the oaths + of the Englishman rose against the general din + of the expostulations of the men and cries of + the women. Match after match was struck by + the men, only to be blown out by some mysterious + agency, after giving momentary + glimpses of the Englishman astride of a man + on the floor, pummelling him lustily, while + Mr. Smitz pulled at the Englishman’s shoulders. + At length the noise died away, the + sound of some one remonstrating, “let me at + him oncet, let me at the spalpeen, he got me + foul,” coming back from some remote region + of the atmosphere, as under the compelling + force of the will of the great Smitz, the bodily + envelope of the Irish hero was dissipated and + his soul went back to the beyond.</p> + + <p>Then did a match reach the gas without + being blown out. Beneath the chandelier + stood Mr. Smitz and the four personages who + <a class="pagenum" id="page101" title="101"> </a>had sat before the cabinet and had views on + the Boer War.</p> + + <p>“What an awful, sacrilegious thing you have + done,” exclaimed Mr. Smitz. “You have + struck the dead.”</p> + + <p>“He hit me first.”</p> + + <p>“Your remarks about the Irish angered him. + He could not restrain himself.”</p> + + <p>“Well, he couldn’t whip me. Next time you + materialize him, he’ll show a black eye. Let + me out of here, you cheat, you imposter, you + and your pals, or I’ll fix you as I did Brian + Boru.”</p> + + <p>Though the company did not take the Englishman’s + view, they were all anxious to go. + They were quite unstrung by what had occurred, + this combat between the living and the dead. + They looked with horrified awe at the spot + where it had taken place. There stood the living + combatant, still full of the fire of battle. + Him whom he had fought was gone on the + winds to the voiceless abodes of the departed, + a breath, a shadow, a sudden chill on the + cheek and nothing more. For a brief space + resuming his old fleshly habitude, with it had + come the cholers and hatreds of the flesh and + once more he avenged his country’s wrongs.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page102" title="102"> </a>“Say,” said the Englishman, with a malign + look on his face, as he paused in the door, “if + you’ve got that mick patched up any down in + the kitchen, I’ll give him another chance, if + he wishes. Tell him to pick a smaller man + next time.”</p> + + <p>To this, Mr. Smitz made no reply, but + flashed a look that would have frozen any one + less insolent and truculent than the Englishman.</p> + + <p>All this time Mr. Middleton had been very + agreeably employed in a corner of the room, + for the young lady in an access of terror had + thrown herself into his arms and there she had + remained during the whole affrighting performance. + To forerun any possible apprehension + that he was going to extricate himself and + leave her, he held her with considerable firmness, + whispering encouragement into her ear + the while. Preparing to accompany her home, + he had almost left the room before he bethought + him of the copper bottle, which he had abandoned + when springing up to get the young lady + out of the circle and away from danger. He + soon found it lying against the wall, whither it + had rolled or been kicked during the melee.</p> + + <p>The young lady continuing to be in a somewhat + <a class="pagenum" id="page103" title="103"> </a>prostrated state after her late experience, + on the way home Mr. Middleton supported + her by his right arm about her waist, while she + found further stay by resting her left arm + across his shoulders, she being a tall young + lady. Their remaining hands met in a clasp + of cheer and encouragement on his part, of + trusting dependence on hers. Arriving at her + door in this fashion, it was but natural for Mr. + Middleton—who was a very natural young + man—to clasp her in a good-night embrace, + but upon essaying to put the touch of completion + to these joys which a kiss would give, she + drew away her head, saying:</p> + + <p>“Why, how dare you, sir! I never met you + before. Why, I haven’t even been formally + introduced to you.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton humbly pleading for the + salute, she continued to express her surprise + that he should prefer such a request upon no + acquaintance at all, that he should even faintly + expect her to grant it, and so on, all the while + leaning languishing upon his breast with all + her weight. Whereupon Mr. Middleton lost + patience and with incisive sarcasm he began:</p> + + <p>“One would think that you who refuse this + kiss were not the girl who stands here within + <a class="pagenum" id="page104" title="104"> </a>my arms, my lips saying this into her ears, + her cheek almost touching mine. Doubtless + it is some one else. Pray tell me, what great + difference is there between kissing a stranger + and hugging him.”</p> + + <p>At these brutal, downright words, leaving the + poor young thing nothing to say, no little pretence + even to herself that she had guarded the + proprieties, had comported herself circumspectly, + leaving her with not even a little rag + of a claim that she had conducted herself with + seemly decorum, she sprang from him and + began to cry. Whatever the cause, Mr. Middleton + could not look upon feminine unhappiness + with composure and here where he was + himself responsible, he was indeed smitten + with keen remorse and hastening to comfort + her, gathered her into his arms and there he + was abasing and condemning himself and telling + her what a dear, nice girl she was—and + kissing away her tears.</p> + + <p>“Let me give you a piece of advice,” he + said, fifteen minutes later, as he was about to + release her and depart. “It is not best ever to + let a man hug you. Never,” he said, pausing + to imprint a lingering kiss upon the girl’s + yielding lips, “never let a man kiss you again + <a class="pagenum" id="page105" title="105"> </a>until that moment when you shall become his + affianced wife.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton departed in that serene state + of mind which the consciousness of virtue + bestows, for he had given the young woman + valuable advice that would doubtless be of + advantage to her in the future and he reflected + upon this in much satisfaction as he fared away + with the eyes of the young woman watching + him from where she looked out of the parlor + window.</p> + + <p>Reaching into his right coat pocket to transfer + the copper bottle to the opposite pocket, + in order that his coat might not be pulled out + of shape, as he grasped the neck, one of his + fingers went right into the mouth! The seal of + Solomon was gone! A less resolute and quick-witted + person might have been alarmed, but + reasoning that the seal must have been knocked + off during the fight at Mr. Smitz’s and nothing + had happened since, he boldly examined the + bottle. He could see a white substance as he + looked into it, and by the aid of a stick he fished + out a wad of wool tightly stuffed in the neck. + A metallic chinking followed the removal + of the wadding and set his heart thumping + rapidly. He looked up and down the street. + <a class="pagenum" id="page106" title="106"> </a>No one in sight. He tilted the bottle up to + the light of a street lamp and saw a yellow + gleam. He shook it and into his hands flowed + a stream of gold sequins! He could not sufficiently + admire the ruse of Prince Houssein. + Money on the first messenger there had been + none.</p> + + <p>In a center more given to numismatics, or + had he been willing to wait and sell the coins + gradually, Mr. Middleton might have secured + more than he did for the gold pieces, all + coined at Bagdad in the early caliphates and + very valuable. But he disposed of them in a + lump to a French gentleman on La Salle Street + for fourteen hundred and twenty-five dollars.</p> + + <p>Calling on the young lady of Englewood + within the next few days, he made no reference + to these events, though she asked him + several times during the evening what he had + been doing lately. He did, however, hint at + having profited by a certain fortunate “deal,” + as he called it, but not a word did he say concerning + the mournful girl or anything remotely + connected with her.</p> + + <p>Hesitating to hurt the emir’s feelings by + exposing the obtuseness of his ancestor Noureddin + and the foolish superstition of his + <a class="pagenum" id="page107" title="107"> </a>descendants ever since, Mr. Middleton said + nothing of these transactions when once more + he sat in the presence of the urbane and + accomplished prince of the tribe of Al-Yam. + Having handed him a bowl of delicately flavored + sherbet, the emir began the narration of + The Pleasant Adventures of Dr. McDill.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_8" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page108" title="108"> </a>The Pleasant Adventures of Dr. McDill.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">It was</span> twelve o’clock on a blustery + winter night and Dr. James McDill + was where a married man of forty + ought to be at such an hour in that + season, sleeping soundly by the side of his + beloved wife. But his wife was not sleeping. + At the stroke of the hour, she had suddenly + awoke from refreshing slumber and become + aware of sounds as of persons moving softly + about the room, and after a little, seeing against + the windows faintly illuminated by a distant + street light, two dark figures, she perceived her + ears had not deceived her. Shaking her husband + unavailingly for a considerable time, in + her terror she finally cast discretion to the + winds and shouted:</p> + + <p>“Burglars, Jim, burglars!”</p> + + <p>Hardly had these words ceased, when the + electric lights were turned on and Dr. McDill + sat up in bed to find himself staring into the + muzzles of three revolvers, held by two masked + <a class="pagenum" id="page109" title="109"> </a>men, who stood looking over the footboard. + Bidding them move at their peril, the man with + two revolvers remained to guard the doctor + and his wife, while the other began to ransack + the room. As he did so, he carried on an + easy, if not eloquent, dissertation upon the + rights of man and the iniquitous conditions + which made it necessary for the poor and + oppressed to obtain by force, if they obtained + at all, any share in the privileges and riches of + the wealthy. As he discoursed, at times carried + away by his theme, he gave over his search + and paused to enforce his points with earnest + gestures. This caused the other robber some + disquietude and he cursed his compatriot and + the doctor and his wife with a use of epithets + that will not bear repeating and which showed + him to be none other than a low ruffian. At + last all the treasure in the room being taken + and the doctor being forced to accompany + them and disclose the repository of other + valuables, the robbers took their departure.</p> + + <p>Some weeks after this, two persons suspected + of being responsible for certain robberies + were taken into custody and the doctor + called into court to identify them if possible.</p> + + <p>“I noticed,” said he, “that the shorter of + <a class="pagenum" id="page110" title="110"> </a>the two masked men was prone to gesticulation + and that he had a fashion of holding his + arms close to his body, as if tied at the elbows, + and with hands fully open, fingers apart, + thumbs extended, and palms upward, waving + his forearms——”</p> + + <p>At this juncture, the smile on the face of the + defendant’s counsel, occasioned by thus putting + his client upon his guard, was dispelled + by an angry exclamation from the person in + question, and denying with some loquacity and + even more vociferation that he ever made such + a gesture, at the close of his statement, behold, + he made the gesture!</p> + + <p>By the doctor’s testimony was a chain of + incriminating evidence established that led to + a sentence of ten years’ imprisonment being + imposed upon the robbers. When he had + heard the sentence, he of the gestures turned + fiercely toward the doctor and cried:</p> + + <p>“You’ll be killed for this, like other dogs + before you for the same cause. If you’re not + killed before I am discharged or escape, I’ll + kill you. But I am only one of many, a tried + band who avenge;” and hereupon he smote the + rail in front of him, “Knock, knock—knock; + knock, knock—knock.” And from several + <a class="pagenum" id="page111" title="111"> </a>parts of the silent room came answers, faint, + but distinct, two quick taps, a pause, and a + third, then all repeated. “Tap, tap—tap; tap, + tap—tap.”</p> + + <p>The evidence of confederates, the quick + response to the appeal of their comrade, the + taps that came from everywhere and nowhere, + manifestation of the desperate men surrounding + him, might well have daunted the soul of any + man. Three sentences had been pronounced + that day, a term of years upon Jerry McGuire + and Barry O’Toole, but death upon James + McDill. You may depend upon it that the + doctor was none the more reassured when on + the morrow he learned that McGuire and + O’Toole had escaped. With their anger and + resentment yet hot within them, these men + would doubtless at once set about to encompass + his destruction, and he knew that when + once one of these societies had decreed the + death of a person who balked or incensed + them, every endeavor was used to put the + decree into effect. But, after a little, he took + courage from the very fact that was most + threatening. If these men, these desperate + and despicable scoundrels, could escape from + the barriers of stone and steel and the guardians + <a class="pagenum" id="page112" title="112"> </a>that surrounded them, why might not he + fight for his life and win in the struggle which + both reason and instinct told him was inevitable?</p> + + <p>That those he loved most might not be + involved in the perils he felt certain he was + about to encounter and that his resolution and + his movements might not be hampered by + their presence and their fears, he found means + to persuade his wife to take the children for a + visit to their grandfather, and setting his affairs + in order and providing himself with two revolvers, + a bowie knife, and an Italian stiletto, + he even began to look forward to the approaching + struggle with something of that pleasure + which man experiences in the anticipation of + any contest; and there is indeed a certain keen + zest in playing the game where one’s stake is + one’s life.</p> + + <p>On the evening of the day of his wife’s departure, + he was called to assist in an operation + at a hospital with which he had once been + connected, and unexpected complications arising, + it was not until two in the morning that + he started away. His man and carriage, that + he had ordered to await him, had gone. The + night was mild and it must have been weariness + <a class="pagenum" id="page113" title="113"> </a>or restiveness, that had caused the departure. + Although some distance lay between + the hospital and his home, he started afoot. + Not a soul was to been seen in the street, which, + thanks to the light of the moon late rising in + its last quarter, lay visible to his sight. As he + passed an alleyway, shortly after leaving the + hospital, his attention was attracted by the + sound of snores, and he discovered a man + whose features were well shrouded in the upturned + collar of an ulster, seated with his back + against a house wall, asleep. The man stirred + uneasily as he bent over him, but thinking it + best not to disturb him, the doctor passed on. + As he did so, he became conscious that the + snores had ceased, and looking back, he beheld + the man walk drowsily across the sidewalk and + finally stand gazing in the direction of the + hospital. The doctor began to hasten his + steps, but ever and anon glancing back, and + presently he saw the man was now looking + after him, that he leaned to the right and + leaned to the left, and stooped down in his + scrutinizing. Suddenly the man reached forward + with a cane, smote the sidewalk, “rap, + rap—rap; rap, rap—rap,” and taken up on + either side of the way, louder and louder as it + <a class="pagenum" id="page114" title="114"> </a>came up the street toward the now fleeing doctor, + from sequestered nooks between buildings, + ran the fateful, hurrying volley of “rap, rap—rap; + rap, rap—rap.” The last raps came right + behind the doctor’s heels at the mouth of an + alley he was clearing at a bound, and glancing + back, he saw a succession of men hurrying + silently after him at all speed. He was encumbered + with a long ulster, while his pursuers, if + they had worn overcoats, had now cast them + aside. The man just behind, apparently did + not wish to close in alone, preferring to allow + others to catch up and assist him, and at the + second block the doctor could hear two pairs + of heels behind him and a third pair just + beyond. The pursuers were gaining. Though + he would have to pause to do it, he must throw + off his overcoat. At the third corner, he tore + at the long garment, it swung under his feet, + and he pitched headlong——. He heard a cry + of savage joy and a rush of feet, a sudden great + soft whirr, and he arose to see an automobile + halted between him and his pursuers. A gentleman + of a rotund person, clothed in correct + evening dress and whose speech was of a + thickness to indicate recent indulgence in + intoxicating liquors, alighted from the carriage.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page115" title="115"> </a>“I do not believe thish ish the place. No, + thish ish not the place I told you to come to, + driver. I’m glad it isn’t anyway, as I’m afraid + we’re too drunk to sing a serenade. Here’s + another man as’s drunk, too. So drunk he fell + down on hisself. Couldn’t leave him here. + Never go back on a man as is drunk. Get in + brother. Take you home with us. Get in.”</p> + + <p>It is needless to say that Dr. McDill responded + to his invitation with the greatest + alacrity and gratitude. For the first time did + the rotund gentleman become aware that there + were other persons present. Some four of the + doctor’s pursuers had now gathered at the curb + of the crossing and the rest were coming + thither, though with no great haste, for they + were gentry to whom caution was second nature + and it was by no means certain what the + arrival of the automobile might portend. The + four at the curb, deterred from retreat by that + sense of shame which is not entirely absent + even in the lowest and most depraved, were + now insistently giving their rap to incite their + comrades to hasten. The rotund gentleman + walked around to that side of the carriage and + gazed at them with some degree of interest and + curiosity. “Rap, rap—rap; rap, rap—rap,” + <a class="pagenum" id="page116" title="116"> </a>went the sticks of the four and down the street + came answering raps and soon the four were + joined by two more.</p> + + <p>“Don’t let him go now, we’ve almost got + him. We’d had him, if Red hadn’t gone to + sleep and let him get by. Come on, come on.”</p> + + <p>The six rushed at the carriage, whereat the + rotund gentleman, with an agility not to be + looked for in one of his contour and condition, + received the foremost with smash, smash—smash, + in each eye and on the nose, and the + second likewise, when bidding the driver be + off, he leaped into the carriage with his comrades. + A single bullet whistled after them as + they whirled away.</p> + + <p>“Rap, rap—rap. I rapped ’em,” said the + rotund gentleman. “I always did hate a + knocker.”</p> + + <p>With your permission I will here interpolate + the remark that the further adventures of the + eminent surgeon with the mysterious confederacy + that sought his life, bore evidence + that these depraved and ruffianly men were + not without a certain rude artistic temperament + as well as a tinge of romance, and a dramatic + sense that many who write for the stage + might well envy them.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page117" title="117"> </a>The elation of the doctor over his escape + from the toils of the thieves was not of long + duration. His breakfast was interrupted by a + call to the telephone and over the wires came + to his startled ears a hollow “knock, knock—knock; + knock, knock—knock.” At his office + door down town softly came “tap, tap—tap; + tap, tap—tap,” and snatch the door open as + hastily as he might, he saw nothing, heard + nothing, heard nothing but the electric bells + on the floors above and floors below calling for + the elevator: “buzz, buzz—buzz; buzz, buzz—buzz.” + He walked along State Street at the + busy hour of noon and all about him in the + throngs was the dull impact of canes upon + the pavement, “thud, thud—thud; thud, thud—thud.” + As he rode home in the street car at + nightfall, back of him in the train at street + corner after corner he heard passengers jingle + the bell for stopping, “ding, ding—ding; ding, + ding—ding.”</p> + + <p>Although Dr. McDill was a man of great + native resolution and intrepid in the face of + known and seen dangers, the horrors of the + invisible forces of death everywhere surrounding + him so wore at his soul that he returned + down town and spent the night at a hotel. On + <a class="pagenum" id="page118" title="118"> </a>the morrow, he severely condemned himself + for this yielding to fear, for on the front steps + of his house lay the dead form of his great + watch dog, Jacques. There were evidences of + a struggle in which the assailants had not been + unscathed. Bits of cloth lay about and examining + the stains of blood that plentifully + blotched the walk, he discovered that some of + it was human blood.</p> + + <p>“Ah,” he said, in deep self-reproach, “if I + had stayed here as I should, I would have been + able to fight with poor Jacques and brought + low some of my enemies. How easily I could + have fired from the upper windows as Jacques + made their presence known. It is evident that + the noise of the struggle was so great that the + fiends were afraid to continue the attack and + ran away.”</p> + + <p>Philosophers and poets have found a theme + for dissertation in the fact that the dog leaves + his own kindred to dwell with man and fights + them in behalf of his master. It has ever + seemed to me that this were but half of the + tale, for full many a man loves his dog better + than the rest of mankind, and so the devotion + of the race of dogs finds return and recompense. + Outside his own family, there was no + <a class="pagenum" id="page119" title="119"> </a>living thing in the city of Chicago which had + so dwelt in the affections of Dr. McDill as the + dog Jacques. Of the truth of this, he had had + but dim realization until now and he was like + to burst with sorrow and with hatred of the vile + beings who had marked him and his for + slaughter. Lifting the stiff form of his humble + comrade, for the first time did he observe a + poniard thrust in the poor beast’s throat. The + blade impaled a piece of paper and upon it was + written the word “Knock.”</p> + + <p>“Knock!” cried the doctor: “but henceforth + it shall be I that knock. Hasten the time when + we may meet, malignant knaves. Never + again shall I avoid you. Henceforth, I go + about my business as before, for it is thus that + I may expect the sooner to encounter you.”</p> + + <p>An urgent matter would require the doctor’s + presence in the municipality of Evanston that + night. He could not expect to return before + twelve o’clock in the morning and of this informing + the cook, who in the temporary reduction + of the family carried on the household + without the aid of a second girl, he departed + northward. It was past the hour of one when + he let himself in the front door of his residence. + A pleasant savor of various viands + <a class="pagenum" id="page120" title="120"> </a>saluted his nostrils and in the drawing-room he + observed that the chairs and tables had all + been thrust against the wall as if to clear the + floor for dancing. In the dining-room, the + evidence of recent festivity was complete, for + the table was covered with the remnants of a + sumptuous repast. No words were needed to + tell him that Olga Blomgren, the cook, had + taken advantage of the foreknowledge of his + absence to entertain a wide circle of friends; + but here indeed was a mystery. Why had she + not set everything in order and removed all + traces of the entertainment? He moved toward + the kitchen in wonder and—his heart stood + still. The beams of the lamp held above his + head were shot back by the gleam of blue and + white satin, his wife’s favorite ball dress on + the kitchen floor. But it was not his wife’s + fair hair and snowy shoulders that, rising out + of the glistening blue and white, were striped + with a glistening red, but the snowy shoulders + and fair hair of poor Olga Blomgren. Thus + had she paid for her hour of magnificence. + Thus had death cut her down because the + maid’s form was of the same statuesque beauty + as her mistress’s. Tenderly the doctor stooped + to lift up the dead girl, stricken in her mistress’s + <a class="pagenum" id="page121" title="121"> </a>stead. There was a poniard in her + throat, and it impaled a piece of paper upon + which was written “Knock.”</p> + + <p>“Knock, knock—” the next knock would + be upon his own heart.</p> + + <p>Whatever design the doctor had held of not + appealing to the police for protection against + his invisible foes, his affairs had now reached a + point where the intervention of the officers of + the law could no longer be avoided. Poor + Jacques could be consigned to earth without + the intervention of priest or police, but the + murder of Olga was a matter for official investigation. + With that crafty and subtle way the + astute sleuths of the Chicago constabulary + have of informing the public through the intermediary + of the press of all measures projected + against evil-doers, of moves to be made, of + arrests to be attempted, all citizens were in + possession of the fact that owing to the startling + plot just brought to light, all gatherings + and coteries of men, especially at late hours, + were to be watched, investigated, and made to + give accounts of themselves. Dr. McDill + fumed at the turn affairs had taken. That the + confederacy of thieves would abandon their + attempts upon his life, was not to be dreamed + <a class="pagenum" id="page122" title="122"> </a>of. But they would forego the pleasure of + witnessing his death in the presence of all + assembled together. They would now delegate + the attack to a single individual, and in + event of his death, he could hope to carry with + him but one of his enemies.</p> + + <p>Again was Dr. McDill called to the hospital + for a night operation. Leaving his driver + without, he cautioned him.</p> + + <p>“August, I don’t want you to be fooled the + way you were before. If any man comes out + of the hospital and says I send word for you to + drive home without waiting for me, pay no + attention to him. Take no orders from anybody + but me.”</p> + + <p>“All right. They can’t fool me vonce again + already.”</p> + + <p>But when a cab drove up and let out a tall + gentleman in a silk hat, who went into the hospital, + and after a little the cab driver, a friendly + and talkative person of Irish extraction, + offered August a flask full of a beverage also + of Irish extraction, August took a drink.</p> + + <p>“He told me not to take no orders yet + already from nobody but him. But he didn’t + say nothin’ about takin’ a drink vonce.”</p> + + <p>“Take a drink twice, then, Hans,” said the + <a class="pagenum" id="page123" title="123"> </a>person of Irish extraction, “already, yet, and + by and by, too.”</p> + + <p>It was all of four hours later that Dr. McDill + stepped out of the hospital door. He paused + under the light of the globe over the porch and + examining a large bag of water-proof silk, he + thrust therein a sponge upon which he poured + the contents of a small phial, after which, seeing + that a noose of string that closed the mouth + of the bag was not entangled, he strode briskly + toward his buggy. The side curtains were on + and consequently the interior was in a dark + shadow. Pausing a moment on the step, as if + to arrange his overcoat, he made a quick, dexterous + movement toward the person in the carriage + and, throwing the bag over his head, + pulled the noose. A terrific blow struck the + doctor in the breast, but the arm that struck it + fell powerless before it could be repeated and + the striker lurched forward on the dashboard + in the utter limpness of complete insensibility.</p> + + <p>“It is not August,” said the doctor, straightening + up the hooded figure and taking the + reins. “How well was my precaution taken! + I believe that was the last knock that any + member of that band of diabolical assassins + will ever strike.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page124" title="124"> </a>In the private laboratory of his own home, + the doctor sat facing his captive, whom, after + binding hand and foot, he had restored to his + senses. The outlaw was the first to break the + silence.</p> + + <p>“You’ve got me and you think you’ll do + me,” said the outlaw, with a succession of + oaths and vile epithets it would be needless as + well as improper for me to repeat. “But if + you harm me, my friends will more than pay + you up for it, just as they have everybody that + crossed them.”</p> + + <p>“Your friends are of a mind to kill me, + whatever befall. Sparing or killing you, will + in nowise affect their purpose. Whatever may + come to-morrow, to-night you must obey my + commands.”</p> + + <p>“I won’t do a thing you tell me to. I don’t + have to, see? My friends will look for you + just as soon as I don’t turn up, and it will go + hard with you.”</p> + + <p>“Just as soon as you do not turn up with the + news you have killed me. We’ll see whether + you will do what I tell you to.”</p> + + <p>“You dassen’t kill me. You’re afraid to kill + me. My friends would fix you and the law + would get you, if they did not.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page125" title="125"> </a>“Your profession relies upon the forbearance + and softheartedness of the public. You know + that those you rob hesitate to shoot. No such + hesitation hampers you. It is part of your + stock in trade to keep the public terrorized. + You kill all who disobey your orders, for if + people began to resist you successfully you + must needs go out of business. Did all put + aside their repugnance to shed blood and kill + your kind as they would wolves, we would have + no more of you.”</p> + + <p>“You dassen’t kill me, you dassen’t kill + me,” cried the robber. It was the snarl of the + wild beast, hopelessly held in the toils.</p> + + <p>“It is true that I hesitate to kill. I am not + proud of this hesitation, for the trend of the + best medical and sociological thought is now + toward the execution of all degenerates and + criminals, that they may not contaminate the + race with descendants. However, my office is + to save life and I cannot do otherwise. But I + am a surgeon, and every day I do things in the + effort to save and prolong life that to a layman + are repulsive and awful, more revolting to + him than the sight of bloodless death itself. + From the taking of human life I draw back. + But no repugnance, no horror, unsteadies my + <a class="pagenum" id="page126" title="126"> </a>hand elsewhere. The end of the crimes of + your devilish confederacy has come. The law + has not restrained you, could not. Your own + unparalleled wickedness has delivered you into + my hands. Many a man have you brought + low, many a family have you desolated. + Widows and orphans cry out against you, and + not in vain. I shall so knock your gang that + never again shall one of you harm even the + weakest. You shall all live, but it shall be + your prayer, if you black hearts can utter + prayer, that you be dead.”</p> + + <p>The outlaw’s tongue moved thickly in a + mouth that dried suddenly at these solemn + words of the doctor. “You can’t do it, you + can’t do it, you can’t do it, you duffer——” + and his voice rumbled on in a long string of + imprecations.</p> + + <p>The doctor seized him and carrying him to + the cellar, lay him against the coal bin. Then + the captive heard him in a room above engaged + upon some sort of carpentry, and whether it + was the captive’s imagination, or design of the + doctor, or whether unconsciously the doctor’s + mind had become possessed, the sounds of the + hammer as it drove nails and struck pieces of + wood into place echoed in the cellar; “knock, + <a class="pagenum" id="page127" title="127"> </a>knock—knock; knock, knock—knock.” Soon + the stairs groaned under the weight of the doctor + carrying some great contrivance, and the + outlaw found himself lying stretched out upon + some sort of operating chair, his ankles held in + a pair of stocks below, his outstretched arms + held by the wrists in a pair of stocks above. + All was black in the cellar, all but where a + single blood red bar of light from the open + door of the furnace fell upon the doctor turning + at the winch of the bed of torture upon + which lay the robber.</p> + + <p>Hardly ten turns did he make, for at the first + little twinges of pain, premonishing the agonies + to come, the caitiff chattered in terror promises + to do all the doctor should order, and so was + released. Cringing and fawning, the outlaw + heard what he was required to do. He was to + write a letter. In this, he was to tell of the + method of his capture. He was to say he was + confined in a second-story room, feet and hands + shackled, and that he was also chained to a + staple in the floor. (That this all might be + true, the doctor took him to a second-story + room and so fettered him.) He found himself + able to use his hands to write, and, happily, + discovered writing material and stamps upon a + <a class="pagenum" id="page128" title="128"> </a>table. He would write a letter and throw it on + the porch below, where perhaps the postman + would find it and send it to its destination. He + asked help. His friends must come that + night. The doctor would be on guard, and who + could say he would not call in others? The + doors and windows were all well secured, all + but a cellar window on the east side. (Of this, + the doctor informed him, that he, the doctor, + might not be guilty of instigating the writing + of anything that was false in any particular.) + They must enter by this window. The door + leading above stairs from the cellar could be + easily forced and the noise thus occasioned + could not be heard outside of the house. They + must come at two in the morning. Come + before another dawn, as the doctor was going + to hold him one day before turning him over to + the police, hoping the gang would do something + to involve themselves in some way they + would not if the police were after them with a + hue and cry.</p> + + <p>The outlaw wrote the letter as ordered, addressed + it to Barry O’Toole, and threw it out + of the window. It fell beyond the porch, on + the ground. But this the doctor remedied by + hiring a small boy for ten cents to pick it up + <a class="pagenum" id="page129" title="129"> </a>and put it in a mail box. After which, the + doctor betook himself to the nearest extensive + hardware establishment.</p> + + <p>At two o’clock the next morning, the beams + of a dark lantern shone athwart the darkness + of the cellar of Dr. McDill’s residence.</p> + + <p>“It’s all right, boys. I can smell escaping + gas, but it’s all right. There’s nobody in + there. Now for the doctor. We’ll kill him + and all who are in there with him, and burn + the house,” said a voice behind the lantern, + and one after another, eleven burly men + dropped into the cellar through the narrow + east window high in the wall. As the feet of + the last man struck the ground, there was a + sound as of a rope jerked by some one in the + orifice by which they had just entered, and + they heard two succeeding crashes within the + cellar, followed by the slam of an iron shutter + over the window. There was a sound of a + spasmodic rush upon the cellar stairs and a + beating upon the door, and then a succession + of softer sounds, as of men rolling down stairs, + and then silence.</p> + + <p>A match was struck upon the outside of the + iron shutter. It revealed the face of Dr. McDill, + lighting a cigar.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page130" title="130"> </a>“The gas alone would have been almost + sufficient. But when all those bottles of ether + and chloroform broke—— I had better open + the window so it will work off and I can get + them out. I will write to my wife to stay away + two months longer. Olga is dead and Kate is + gone. I’ll discharge August to-morrow, as he + deserves. The field is clear.”</p> + + <p>One morning, as Hans Olson, cook of the + King Olaf Magnus, staunch schooner engaged + in the shingle trade between Chicago and the + city of Manistee, state of Michigan, on this + particular morning lying in the Chicago River—on + this morning, as Mr. Olson was pouring + overboard some dishwater, preparing the + breakfast for the yet sleeping crew, he was + horrified to see floating in the current that + would eventually carry them past the great city + of St. Louis, twelve naked human arms. + Despite his horror and alarm at this grewsome + array of severed members, he noted that so far + as he could observe, they were all left arms, + forearms, disjointed at the elbows. Subsequent + examination but added to the mystery. + It was no trick of medical students intended to + set the town agog. They were not dissecting + subjects, but limbs lately taken from living + <a class="pagenum" id="page131" title="131"> </a>bodies, and they were detached with the highest + skill known to the art of chirurgery. The + town talked and it was a day’s wonder, but the + solving of the mystery proving impossible, it + was passing into tradition when all were horrified + anew to hear that Johannes Klubertanz, a + member of the great and honest German-American + element, while walking through Lincoln + Park early one morning, stumbled over + some objects which, upon examination, proved + to be twelve human forearms, <em>right forearms!</em></p> + + <p>Again were the wisest baffled in even guessing + at this riddle, as they were a third time, + when one Prosper B. Shaw came with the story + that while rowing down in the drainage canal, + he had come upon, floating gently along, dissevered + at the knee joint, <em>twelve human legs!</em></p> + + <p>The whole community shuddered at the dark + secret hidden in their midst, but at last came + the answer, yet not the answer. Of all strange + crews that mortal sight has gazed upon, that + was the strangest, that dozen men who out of + nowhere appeared suddenly in the streets one + morning, armless all, all with wooden left + legs. Their story you would ask in vain, for + just the little chord by which the tongue forms + intelligible words was gone. Their babblings + <a class="pagenum" id="page132" title="132"> </a>came just to the border of articulate speech, + but not beyond. Torrents of half-formed + words they poured forth, but only half-formed, + and to their mouthed jabber the crowd + listened without understanding. Did you + thrust a pencil in their jaws and bid them + write their tale? Gone was some little muscle + that grips the jaws and the pencils lolled + between teeth that could not nip them. And + as for their lips, oh, their mouths, their + mouths! Such an example of the chirurgery + that has to do with the altering of the human + face had never before been witnessed, for + nature had never made those faces. One such + countenance she might have made in cruel + sport, but never twelve, and twelve altogether, + as like as peas in a pod, twelve human jack + o’lanterns, twelve travesties upon humanity’s + front. Howsoever they might once have + looked, not even their own mothers could + know them now. Around each eye the same + wrinkles led away. On each face was a bulbous + nose. But the mouths, oh, the mouths! + Each was drawn back over the teeth in a perpetual + grin, each was upturned at corners which + ended well nigh in the middle of the cheek. + Here were the victims of the horrors that had + <a class="pagenum" id="page133" title="133"> </a>made the city shudder, but dumb and unrecognizable. + In all the thousands that looked at + them, not one could say he had ever seen + them before. In all these thousands, there + was not one to whom they could speak. There + were their stiff faces, frozen into that terrible + perpetual grin, so many idols of wood, save for + their eyes, and they were the only things that + lived in their dead faces.</p> + + <p>Such rudimentary human beings it would be + hard to conceive, and so after a while it occurred + to some one that the same scientific + methods that discover and disclose to us the + modes of life, the habits, and even thoughts + of primitive and rudimentary man, might be + devoted to establishing a means of communication + with them and unveil the secret the + whole world was eager to know. Accordingly, + they were taken to the University of Chicago + and turned over to the department of anthropology. + The learned expounders of this science + were not long in devising a simple means + of communication. The twelve unfortunates + were seated upon a recitation bench and a + doctor of philosophy wrote out an alphabet + upon the blackboard.</p> + + <p>“One rap of your foot will be A,” said the + <a class="pagenum" id="page134" title="134"> </a>doctor of philosophy. “Two will be B. Two + raps, a pause, and one will be C. We will + soon learn your story.”</p> + + <p>At this moment, the reverberations of a + prodigious blow upon the door outside echoed + through the room, “bang, bang—bang, bang, + bang—bang.”</p> + + <p>Unaccountably startled, as if at the hearing + of some portent, the professor stood rooted to + the spot for a moment, and then was about to + leap to the door, when the simulacrums before + him sprang to their feet and with a tremendous + stamping, smote their wooden legs upon the + floor, “stamp, stamp—stamp, stamp, stamp—stamp.”</p> + + <p>The professor stared at the twelve mutes. + There were their immobile faces, as wooden as + their wooden legs, wearing their perpetual + grin, but the westering sun shone on their eyes + and there he saw an abject, grovelling fear, + dreadful to behold, the master passion of + twelve souls, slaves to some mysterious will + which had just made itself manifest out of the + unseen. By what means the will had gained + this ascendancy, the terrible disfigurements of + their remnants of bodies told only too well, + and he who ran could read the utter prostration + <a class="pagenum" id="page135" title="135"> </a>before the power which in their lives had been + the greatest and most terrible in the universe. + Again, far off in a distant corridor of the + building, slowly rumbled to them: “knock, + knock—knock; knock, knock—knock,” and + the twelve unfortunates, like so many automatons, + gave token of their obedience. They + had been warned to keep the secret.</p> + + <p>And so was foiled the attempts of the learned + anthropologists to hold converse with these + rudimentary beings. The alphabet of such + elaborate devisings went for naught. Never + did the twelve persons in the state of primitive + culture get further than the letter C: “knock, + knock—knock; knock, knock—knock.”</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_9" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page136" title="136"> </a>What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Fifth Gift of the Emir.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">“I am</span> at a loss to understand,” said + Mr. Middleton, “why you have entitled + the narration you have just + related, ‘The Pleasant Adventures + of Dr. McDill.’ For to my mind, they seemed + anything but pleasant adventures.”</p> + + <p>“How so?” asked the emir. “Is it not + pleasant to thwart the machinations and defeat + the evil intentions of the villains such as composed + the confederacy that sought the doctor’s + life? Does there not reside in mankind a + sense of justice which rejoices at seeing meted + out to wrong-doers the deserts of their + crimes?”</p> + + <p>To which Mr. Middleton replying with a nod + of thoughtful assent, after a proper period of + rumination upon the words of the emir, that + accomplished ruler continued:</p> + + <p>“Despite the boasted protection of the law, + how often is a man compelled to rely for his + protection upon his own prowess, skill or + address. There are many occasions when right + <a class="pagenum" id="page137" title="137"> </a>under the nose of the police, one saves himself + by the resort to physical strength, weapons, or + the use of a cajoling tongue. Theoretically, + Dr. McDill was amply protected by the mantle + of the law. In reality, it was man to man as + much as if he had met his foes in the Arabian + desert, with none but himself and them and + the vultures. Do you go armed?”</p> + + <p>“No,” replied Mr. Middleton, with a flippant + smile; “but I can go pretty fast, and that + has heretofore done as well as going armed.”</p> + + <p>“Young man,” said the emir, sternly, “a + bullet can outstrip your fleetest footsteps. + There may never be but one occasion when you + will need a weapon, but on that occasion the + possession of the means of protection may + spell the difference between life and life.”</p> + + <p>Hardly had he uttered them, before Mr. + Middleton regretted his forward and pert + words, for never before had he answered the + emir lightly, such was his respect for him as a + man of goodly parts and as one set in authority, + and such was his gratitude toward him as + a benefactor. Stammering forth what was at + once an apology and an acknowledgement of + the wisdom of what the emir had said, Mr. + Middleton began to make preparations to go. + <a class="pagenum" id="page138" title="138"> </a>But Prince Achmed bade him wait, and saying + a few words to Mesrour in the Arabic language, + the blackamore brought to him a pair + of pistols of a formidable aspect. In sooth, + one could hardly tell whether they ought to be + called pistols, or culverins. In the shape of + the stocks alone could anyone detect that they + were pistols. The bore of each was more than + an inch in diameter, and the octagonal barrels + of thick steel, heavily inlaid with silver, were + a foot and a half long. The handles, which + were in proportion to the barrels and so long + that four hands could grasp them, were so + completely covered with an inlay of pearl that + no wood was visible. Taking one of them, the + emir rammed home a great load of powder, + upon which he placed a handful of balls as + large as marbles. Having served the second + likewise, he handed the pair to Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“Take them. Protected by them, you need + have little fear. But woe betide the man who + stands in front of them, for so wide is the distribution + of their charge, that he must be a + most indifferent marksman who could not do + execution with them.”</p> + + <p>Thanking the emir for the gift and the entertainment + and instruction of his discourse, Mr. + <a class="pagenum" id="page139" title="139"> </a>Middleton departed. Impressed though he + had been by Prince Achmed’s counsel and by + the lesson to be derived from the recital of the + experiences of Dr. McDill, Mr. Middleton did + not carry the pistols as he went about his daily + vocation. It was impossible to so bestow them + about his garments that they did not cause + large and unsightly protuberances and to + carry them openly was not to be thought of. + Their weight, too, was so great that it was burdensome + to carry them in any manner. Coming + into his room unexpectedly in the middle + of the forenoon of the Thursday following the + acquisition of the weapons, he surprised Hilda + Svenson, maid of all work, in the act of examining + one of them, which she had extracted + from the place where they lay concealed in the + lower bureau drawer beneath a pile of underclothing. + With a start of guilty surprise, + Hilda let the pistol fall to the floor. Fortunately + it did not go off, but nonetheless was + he convinced that he ought to dispose of the + two weapons, for any day Hilda might shoot + herself with one, while on the weekly sheet + changing day, Mrs. Leschinger, the landlady, + might shoot herself with the other. There was + no place in the room where he could conceal + <a class="pagenum" id="page140" title="140"> </a>them from the painstaking investigations of + Hilda and Mrs. Leschinger, and the expedient + of extracting the charges not occurring to him, + he felt that it was clearly his duty to remove + the lives of the two women from jeopardy by + disposing of the pistols. He was in truth + pained at the necessity of parting with the + gifts which the emir had made with such solicitude + for his welfare and as some assuagement + to this regret he sought to dispose of them as + profitably as possible. With this end in view, + he made an appointment for a private audience + after hours with Mr. Sidney Kuppenheimer, + who conducted a large loan bank on Madison + Street and was reputed a connoisseur and + admirer of all kinds of curios.</p> + + <p>On the evening for which he had made the + appointment, he set forth, intending to make + an early and short call upon his friend Chauncy + Stackelberg and wife, before repairing to Mr. + Kuppenheimer’s place of business. But such + was the engaging quality of the conversation + of the newly married couple, abounding both + in humor and good sense, and so interested was + he in hearing of the haps and mishaps of married + life, a state he hoped to enter as soon as + fortune and the young lady of Englewood + <a class="pagenum" id="page141" title="141"> </a>should be propitious, that he was unaware of + the flight of time until in the midst of a pause + in the conversation, he heard the cathedral + clock Mrs. Stackelberg’s uncle had given her + as a wedding present, solemnly tolling the hour + of eleven. The hour Mr. Kuppenheimer had + named was one hour agone. To have kept + the appointment, he should have started two + hours before.</p> + + <p>Another half hour had flown before Mr. + Middleton, having paused to partake of some + chow-chow recently made by Mrs. Stackelberg + and highly recommended by her liege, finally + left the house, carrying a pistol in either hand. + The night was somewhat cloudy, but although + there was neither moon nor stars, it was much + lighter than on some nights when all the minor + luminaries are ablaze, or the moon itself is + aloft, shining in its first or last quarter, a phenomenon + remarked upon by an able Italian + scientist in the middle of the last century and + by him attributed to some luminous quality + that inheres in the clouds themselves. Mr. + Middleton was walking along engrossed in + thoughts of the scene of domestic bliss he had + lately quitted and in dreams of the even more + delightful home he hoped to some day enjoy + <a class="pagenum" id="page142" title="142"> </a>with the young lady of Englewood, when he + suddenly became cognizant of four individuals + a short distance away, comporting themselves + in an unusual and peculiar manner. Cautiously + approaching them as quietly as possible, he + perceived that it was two robbers despoiling + two citizens of their valuables, one pair standing + in the middle of the street, one on the sidewalk, + the citizens with their hands elevated + above their heads in a strained and uncomfortable + attitude, while each robber—with back to + him—was pointing a revolver with one hand + and turning pockets inside out with the other.</p> + + <p>With a resolution and celerity that astonished + him, as he afterwards dwelt upon it in + retrospect, Mr. Middleton rushed silently upon + the nearest robber, him in the street, and dealt + him a terrible blow upon the head with the + barrel of a pistol. Without a sound, the robber + sank to the earth, whereupon the citizen, + whether he had lost his head through fear, or + thought Mr. Middleton a new and more dangerous + outlaw, fled away like the wind. + Snatching the bag of valuables in the unconscious + thief’s hands, Mr. Middleton made + toward the other robber, who, to his astonishment, + hissed without looking around:</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page143" title="143"> </a>“What did you let your man get away for, + you fool? Try and make yourself useful somehow. + Hold this swag and cover the man, so I + can have both hands and get through quick.”</p> + + <p>Taking the valuables the robber handed + him, Mr. Middleton with calmness and deliberation + placed them in his pockets, after which + he placed a muzzle of a pistol in the back of + the robber’s neck and sharply commanded:</p> + + <p>“Hands up!”</p> + + <p>Up went the robber’s hands as if he were a + jumping-jack jerked by a string, whereupon his + late victim, doubtless animated by the same + emotions as those of the other citizens, fled + away like the wind, but not in silence, for at + every jump he bellowed, “Thieves, murder, + help!”</p> + + <p>A window slammed up in the house before + which they were standing and the glare of an + electric bicycle lamp played full upon Mr. + Middleton and his prisoner.</p> + + <p>“I’ve got him,” said Mr. Middleton, + proudly.</p> + + <p>“Got him! Got him!” gasped an astonished + voice. “Well, of all effrontery! Got him, + you miserable thief? The police are coming + and they’ll get you, and I can identify you, if + <a class="pagenum" id="page144" title="144"> </a>they don’t succeed in nabbing you red-handed.”</p> + + <p>Shocked and almost paralyzed, Mr. Middleton + turned to expostulate with the misled + householder, when the robber, seizing the + opportunity, fled away like the wind, bellowing + at every jump, “Thieves, murder, help!” and as + if aroused by the sound of his compatriot’s + voice, the thief who had been lying unconscious + in the street all this while, arose and hastened + away, somewhat unsteadily, it is true, yet at a + considerable degree of speed.</p> + + <p>It did not require any extended reflective + processes for Mr. Middleton to tell himself + that if he waited for the police, he would be in + a very bad plight, for he had the stolen property + upon his person, the thieves had gone, + and even if the victims were able to say he was + not one of the two original thieves—which + their disturbed state of mind made most uncertain—they + would be likely to declare him a + thief notwithstanding, a charge which the + stolen property on his person would bear out. + The police could now be heard down the street + and the householder was making the welkin + ring with vociferous shouts. With a sudden + access of rage at this individual whose well-intended + <a class="pagenum" id="page145" title="145"> </a>efforts had thwarted justice and might + yet fasten crime upon innocence, Mr. Middleton + pointed a pistol at the upper pane of the + window where shone the bicycle lamp. There + was a roar that shook the air, followed by a + crash of glass and the clatter of a dozen bullets + upon the brick wall of the house, and a + shriek of terror from the householder and the + bicycle lamp instantly vanished. With a heart + strangely at peace in the midst of the dangers + that encompassed him, Mr. Middleton sped up + the street, dashed through an alleyway, back + for a block on the next street in the direction + he had just come, and thenceforth leisurely + and with an appearance of virtue he did not + need to feign, made his way home without + molestation.</p> + + <p>Upon examining the booty that had so + strangely come into his possession, Mr. Middleton + was at a loss to think which were the + greater villains, those who had robbed, or those + who had been robbed. One wallet contained + five hundred and forty dollars in greenbacks + and some memoranda accompanying it showed + that it was a corruption fund to be used in + bribing voters at an approaching election. The + other wallet contained sixty dollars and a detailed + <a class="pagenum" id="page146" title="146"> </a>plan for bribery, fraud, and intimidation + which was to be carried out in one of the + doubtful wards. There were also some silver + coins, and two gold watches bearing no names + or marks that could identify their owners, but + the detailed plan contained the name of the + politician who had drawn it up and who was to + be benefited by its successful accomplishment. + This was a clue by following which Mr. Middleton + might have found the parties who had + been robbed and return their property, but he + was deterred from doing so by several considerations. + The knowledge he had of the + proposed fraud was exceedingly dangerous to + the interests of one of the political parties and + to the personal interests of one of the bosses + of that party. It would be clearly to their + advantage to have Mr. Middleton jailed and so + put where there would be no danger that he + would divulge the information in his possession. + Besides this, the money was to be used + for corrupt purposes, would go into the hands + of evil men who would spend it evilly. Deprived + of it, a thoroughly bad man was less + likely to be elected. For these moral and + prudential reasons, Mr. Middleton saw that it + was plainly his duty to the public and to himself + <a class="pagenum" id="page147" title="147"> </a>to retain the money. The victims, bearing + in mind that the recovery of the money by + the police would also mean the discovery of + the incriminating documents and that any persecution + of the robbers might incite them to + sell the documents to the opposite party, would + be very chary about doing or saying anything. + But there was the householder, who surely + would tell his tale and who had an idea of Mr. + Middleton’s personal appearance. Accordingly, + that excellent young man disposed of + the gold watches to one Isaac Fiscovitz on + lower State Street, and with the results of the + exchange purchased an entirely new suit, new + hat, and new shoes. The incriminating documents, + he placed under the carpet in his room + against a time when he might see an opportunity + to safely dispose of them to the pecuniary + advantage of himself and to the + discomfiture of the contemptible creature + whose handiwork they were.</p> + + <p>He said nothing of these transactions when + on the appointed evening he once more sat in + the presence of the urbane prince of the tribe + of Al-Yam. Having handed him a bowl of delicately + flavored sherbet, Achmed began the narration + of The Adventure of Miss Clarissa Dawson.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_10" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page148" title="148"> </a>The Adventure of Miss Clarissa Dawson.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">Miss Clarissa Dawson</span> was a young + lady who had charge of the cutlery + counter in one of the great emporiums + of State Street. She was reckoned of + a pretty wit and not more cutting were the + Sheffield razors that were piled before her than + the remarks she sometimes made to those who, + incited thereto by her reputation for readiness + of retort, sought to engage her in a contest of + repartee. It was seldom that she issued from + these encounters other than triumphant, leaving + her presumptuous opponents defeated and + chagrined. But in the month of November of + the last year, for once she owned to herself + that she had been overcome,—overcome, it is + true, because her adversary was plainly a person + of stupidity, mailed by his doltishness + against the keenest sarcasm she could launch + against him, yet nevertheless overcome. To + her choicest bit of irony, the individual replied, + “Somebody left you on the grindstone and + <a class="pagenum" id="page149" title="149"> </a>forgot to take you off,” to which the most + adroit in quips and quirks could find no fitting + replication, unless it were to indulge in facial + contortion or invective, and Miss Clarissa was + too much of a lady to do either. Forced into + silence, she had no resource but to seek to + transfix him with a protracted and contemptuous + stare, which, though failing to disconcert + the object, put her in possession of the facts + that he had mild blue eyes, that the remnants + of his hair were red, that he was slightly above + middle height and below middle age, and that + there was little about his face and still less his + figure to distinguish him from a multitude of + men of the average type. Indeed, one could + not even conjecture his nationality, for his + type was one to be seen in all branches of the + Indo-European race. If from a package in his + upper left-hand coat pocket, which, broken, + disclosed some wieners, you concluded he was + of the German nation, a short dudeen in an + upper vest pocket would seem to indicate that + he was an Irishman. His coat was of black + cheviot, new, and of the current cut. His vest + was of corduroy, of the kind in vogue in the + past decade, while his pantaloons, black, with + a faint green line in them, were a compromise, + <a class="pagenum" id="page150" title="150"> </a>being of a non-commital cut that would never + be badly out of style in any modern period.</p> + + <p>Sustaining Miss Clarissa’s stare with great + composure, he purchased six German razors at + thirty-five cents each, six English at fifty, + twelve American at the same price, and a stray + French razor at sixty-two.</p> + + <p>“Don’t you want some razorine?” asked Miss + Clarissa. “It makes razors—and other things—sharper.”</p> + + <p>“Why don’t you use it, then, instead of lobsterine?” + replied the stranger, picking up his + package and the change. Miss Clarissa + deigning to give no reply but an angry frown, + the stranger expressed his gratitude for the + amusement he intimated she had afforded him + and he further said he hoped he would see her + at the Charity Ball and he made bold to ask + her to save the second two-step for him, and + thereafter departed, having declined Miss + Clarissa’s offer to have his purchases sent to + his address, an offer dictated not by a spirit of + accommodation and kindliness, but by a + desire to learn in what part of the city he had + his residence.</p> + + <p>On the morrow again came a man to purchase + razors, of which there was a large number + <a class="pagenum" id="page151" title="151"> </a>on Miss Clarissa’s counter, traveling men’s + samples for sale at ridiculous prices. The man + had purchased two dozen razors before Miss + Clarissa, noting this similarity to the transactions + of the odious person and thereby led to + take a good look at him, observed with astonishment + that this new man had on exactly the + same suit that had been worn by the purchaser + of the day before. She recognized the fabric, + the color, everything down to a discoloration + on the left coat lapel. Here the resemblance + ended. The second individual was a young + man. He had a heavy shock of abundant hair. + He was not more than twenty-eight years old + and so far from being commonplace, he was of + a distinguished appearance. But as the eyes + of Miss Clarissa continued to dwell upon him + in some admiration, she told herself that the + resemblance did not end with the clothes, + after all. His eyes were of the same blue, his + hair of the same auburn as those of the man of + yesterday. Indeed, the man of yesterday + might have been this man with twenty years + added on him, with the light of hope and ambition + dimmed by contact with the world, and + his youthful alertness and dash succeeded by + the resigned vacuity of one who has seen none + <a class="pagenum" id="page152" title="152"> </a>of his early dreams realized. Again did Miss + Clarissa ask if he would have his purchases + sent to his address, but this time it was not + entirely curiosity and the perfunctory performance + of a duty, for she would gladly have been + of service to one of such a pleasing presence. + Communing with himself for a moment, the + young man said:</p> + + <p>“On the whole, you may. But they must + be delivered to me in person, into my own + hands. I would take them, but I have a number + of other things to take. Remember, they + are to be delivered to me in person,” and he + handed her a card which announced that his + name was Asbury Fuller and on which was + written in lead pencil the address of a house + in a quarter of the city which, once the most + fashionable of all, had suffered from the encroachments + of trade and where a few mansions + yet occupied by the aristocracy were + surrounded by the deserted homes of families + which had fled to the newer haunts of fashion, + leaving their former abodes to be occupied by + boarding mistresses, dentists, doctors, clairvoyants, + and a whole host of folk whose names + would never be in the papers until their burial + permits were issued.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page153" title="153"> </a>Miss Clarissa did a very peculiar thing. It + was already four o’clock of a Saturday afternoon. + Instead of immediately giving the + package into the hands of the delivery department, + she retained it and, at closing time, going + to the room where ready made uniforms for + messenger boys were kept, she purloined one. + Now it must be known that the principal reason + for doing a thing so unusual, not to say indiscreet, + was her desire to obey the young man’s + injunction to hand the razors into his own + hands and no others. She had become possessed + of the idea that some disaster would + befall if the razors came into the possession of + any one else. Moreover, the stranger had + humbled her in the contest of repartee, which, + as a true woman, had made her entertain an + admiration for him, and this and his strange + disguises and his unaccountable purchases had + surrounded him with a mist of romantic mystery + she fain would penetrate. Some little + time before, it had been Miss Clarissa’s misfortune, + through sickness, to lose much of her + hair. It had now begun to grow again and + resume its former luxuriant abundance, but by + removing several switches—of her own hair—and + the bolster commonly called a rat, and + <a class="pagenum" id="page154" title="154"> </a>sleeking her hair down hard with oil, she + appeared as a boy might who was badly in + need of a haircut. After a light supper, she + set out alone for the residence of Asbury Fuller + and at the end of her journey found herself + at the gateway of a somber edifice, which was + apparently the only one in the block that was + inhabited. On either side and across the way + were vacant houses, lonesome and forbidding. + Indeed, the residence of Asbury Fuller was + itself scarcely less lonesome and forbidding. + The grass of the plot before it was long and + unkempt and heavily covered with mats of + autumn leaves. The bricks of the front walk + were sunken and uneven and the steps leading + to the high piazza were deeply warped, as by + pools of water that had lain and dried on their + unswept surface through many seasons. The + blinds hung awry and the paint on the great + front doors was scaling, and altogether it was a + faded magnificence, this of Asbury Fuller. + She pulled the handle of the front-door bell + and in response to its jangling announcement + came a maid.</p> + + <p>“Asbury Fuller?” said the maid, omitting + the “Mr.” Miss Clarissa had affixed. “Go to + the side door around to the right.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page155" title="155"> </a>Wondering if this were a lodging house and + Asbury Fuller had a private entrance, or if it + being his own house he had left word that + callers should be sent to the side door to prevent + the delivery of the razors being seen by + others, Clarissa followed the walk through an + avenue of dead syringa bushes and came to the + side door. The same maid who had met her + before, ushered her in and presently she found + herself in a small apartment, almost a closet, + standing at the back of Asbury Fuller. But + though small, she remarked that the apartment + was one of some magnificence, for on all sides + was a quantity of burnished copper, binding + the edges of a row of shelves and covering the + whole top of a broad counter-like projection + running along one side of the wall. Before + this, Asbury Fuller was standing, assorting a + number of cut-glass goblets of various sizes + and putting them upon silver salvers, bottles + of various colored wines being placed upon + each salver with the goblets. He turned at her + entrance and the look of sad and gloomy abstraction + sitting upon his countenance instantly + changed to one of relief and joy.</p> + + <p>“At last, at last,” he exclaimed, in a deep + tone which even more than his countenance + <a class="pagenum" id="page156" title="156"> </a>betrayed his relief and joy. “It is almost too + late and I thought the young woman had not + attended to sending them, that she had failed + me.”</p> + + <p>“She would not fail you, sir,” said Clarissa, + earnestly, allowing herself in the protection + her assumed character gave her the pleasure of + giving utterance to her feeling of regard for + the young man. “She would not fail, sir, she + could not fail you. Oh, you wrong her, if you + think she could ever break her word to you.”</p> + + <p>Asbury Fuller bent an inscrutable look upon + Clarissa and then bidding her remain until his + return, hastily left the room. But though he + was gone, Clarissa sat gloating upon the mental + picture of his manly beauty. He seemed + taller than before, for the stoop he had worn in + the afternoon had now departed and he stood + erect and muscular in the suit of full evening + dress that set off his lithe, soldierly form to + such advantage. His garb was of an elegance + such as Clarissa had never before beheld, and + it was plain that the aristocracy affected certain + adornments in the privacy of their homes + which they did not caparison themselves with + in public. Clarissa had seen dress suits in restaurants + and in theaters, but never before had + <a class="pagenum" id="page157" title="157"> </a>she seen a bottle-green dress coat with gold + buttons and a velvet collar and a vest with + broad longitudinal stripes of white and brown. + In a brief space, Asbury Fuller returned, and + glancing at his watch, he said:</p> + + <p>“There is some time before the dinner party + begins and I would like to talk with you. I + am impressed by your apparent honesty and + particularly by the air of devotion to duty that + characterizes you. The latter I have more + often remarked in women than in the more + selfish sex to which we belong. We need a + boy here. Wages, twenty dollars a month and + keep.”</p> + + <p>“Oh, sir, I should be pleased to come.”</p> + + <p>“Your duties will commence at once. Owing + to the fact that this old house has been empty + for some time and the work of rehabilitating + and refurnishing it is far from completed, you + cannot at present have a room to yourself. + You will sleep with John Klussmann, the + hostler——”</p> + + <p>“Oh, sir, I cannot do that,” exclaimed + Clarissa, starting up in alarm.</p> + + <p>“John is a good boy and kicks very little in + his sleep. But doubtless you object to the + smell of horses.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page158" title="158"> </a>“Oh, sir, let me do what is needed this evening + and go home and I will come back and + work to-morrow and go home to-morrow night, + and if by that time you find I can have a + room by myself, perhaps I will come permanently.”</p> + + <p>“I don’t smell of horses myself,” said + Asbury Fuller, musingly, to which Clarissa + making no response other than turning away + her head to hide her blushes, he continued. + “But two days will be enough. Indeed, to-night + is the crucial point. I will not beat about + the bush longer. I wish to attach you to my + interests. I wish you to serve me to-night in + the crisis of my career.”</p> + + <p>“Oh, sir,” said Clarissa, in the protection + that her assumed character gave her, allowing + herself the privilege of speaking her real sentiments, + “I am attached to your interests. Let + me serve you. Command, and I will use my + utmost endeavor to obey.”</p> + + <p>Asbury Fuller looked at her in surprise. + Carried away by her feelings and in the state + of mental exaltation which the romance and + mystery of the adventure had induced, she had + made a half movement to kneel as she thus + almost swore her fealty in solemn tones.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page159" title="159"> </a>“Why are you attached to my interests?” + asked Asbury Fuller, somewhat dryly.</p> + + <p>Alas, Clarissa could not take advantage of + the protection her assumed character gave her + to tell the real reason. Only as a woman + could she do that, only as a woman could she + say and be believed, “Because I love you.”</p> + + <p>“Why, some people are naturally leaders, + naturally draw others to them——”</p> + + <p>“You cannot be a spy upon me, since no one + knows who I am.”</p> + + <p>“A spy!” cried Clarissa, in a voice whose + sorrowful reproach gave convincing evidence + of her ingenuousness.</p> + + <p>“I wrong you, I wrong you,” said Asbury + Fuller. “I will trust you. I will tell you + what you are to do——”</p> + + <p>“Butler,” said a maid, poking her head in at + the door, “it is time to come and give the finishing + touches to the table. It is almost time + for the dinner to be served,” and without ado, + Asbury Fuller sprang out of the room.</p> + + <p>A butler! A butler! Clarissa sat stunned. + It was thus that her hero had turned out. + Could she tell the other girls in the store with + any degree of pride that she was keeping company + with a butler? She had received a good + <a class="pagenum" id="page160" title="160"> </a>literary education in the high school at Muncie, + Indiana, and was a young woman of taste and + refinement. Could she marry a butler? To + be near her hero, she herself had just now been + willing to undertake a menial position. But + she had then imagined him to be a person of + importance. This stage in her cogitations led + her to the reflection that her feelings were unworthy + of her. Had her regard for Asbury + Fuller been all due to the belief that he was a + person of importance, merely the worship of + position, the selfish desire and hope—however + faint—of rising to affluence and social dignity + through him? Butler or no butler, Asbury + Fuller was handsome, he was distinguished, his + manner of speech was superior to that of any + person she had ever known. Butler or no butler, + she loved him. Just now she had hoped + that he, rich and well placed, would overlook + her poverty, and take her, friendless and + obscure, for his bride. Could she give less + than she had hoped he would give? And then + as butler, her chances of winning him were so + greatly increased.</p> + + <p>In a short time, he returned. He told her + she was to wait on the table and instructed her + how to serve the courses.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page161" title="161"> </a>“The master will look surprised when he + sees you instead of me. If he asks who you + are, say the new page. But he will be too + much afraid of exciting the wonder of his + guests to ask you any questions. I feel certain + that he will accept your presence without + question, being desirous his guests shall not + think him a tyro in the management of an + establishment like this. I feel certain that + after dinner, his guests will ask to see his collection + of arms. Indeed, Miss Bording told + him in my hearing last Monday that she + accepted his invitation here on condition that + she be allowed to see the famous collection. + You are to follow them into the drawing-room + after dinner. The master will not know + whether that is usual or not. If they do start + to go to look at the arms, you are to say, ‘The + collection of your former weapons, sir, has + been placed in the first room to the left at the + head of the stairs. The paper-hangers and + decorators have been busy.’ Then you are to + lead the way into that room, which you will + find dimly lighted. After that, I will attend to + everything myself.”</p> + + <p>Although Clarissa could not but wonder at + the strangeness of her instructions and to be + <a class="pagenum" id="page162" title="162"> </a>somewhat alarmed at the evidences of a plot + in which she was to be an agent, she agreed, + for though her regard for Asbury Fuller would + have been sufficient to cause such acquiescence, + so great was her curiosity to have solved the + mysteries which surrounded that individual, + that this alone would have gained her consent.</p> + + <p>There were but two guests at the table of + Mr. William Leadbury—Judge Volney Bording, + and his daughter, Eulalia Bording. Mr. Leadbury + cast a look of surprise and displeasure as + he saw Clarissa serving the first course, but he + quickly concealed these emotions and proceeded + to plunge into an animated conversation + with his guests. Indeed, it assumed the + character of a monologue in which he frequently + adverted to the weather, to be off on a + tangent the next moment on a discussion of + finance, politics, sociology, on which subjects, + however, he was far from showing the + positiveness and fixed opinion that he did while + descanting upon the weather. In all the subjects + he touched upon, he exhibited a certain + skill in so framing his remarks that they would + not run counter to any prejudices or opposite + opinions of his auditors, but the feelings of the + auditors having been elicited, served as a preamble + <a class="pagenum" id="page163" title="163"> </a>from which he could go on, warmly + agreeing with their views in the further and + more complete unfolding of his own. He was + between twenty-seven and thirty years of age, + of a somewhat spare figure, and in the well-proportioned + features of his face there was no one + that would attract attention beyond the others + and easily remain fixed in memory. He was + not without an appearance of intelligence and + his chest was thrown out and the small of his + back drawn in after the manner of the Prussian + ex-sergeants who give instruction in athletics + and the cultivation of a proper carriage to the + elite of this city, and withal he had the appearance + of a person of substance and of consequence + in his community. In the midst of + a pause where he was occupied in putting + his soup-spoon into his mouth, Miss Bording + remarked:</p> + + <p>“Please do not talk about commonplace + American subjects, Mr. Leadbury. Tell us of + your foreign life. Tell us of Algeria. What + sort of a country is Algeria?”</p> + + <p>Turning his eyes toward the chandelier about + him and with an elegance of enunciation that + did much to relieve the undeniably monotonous + evenness of his discourse, he began:</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page164" title="164"> </a>“Algeria, the largest and most important of + the French colonial possessions, is a country + of northern Africa, bounded on the north by + the Mediterranean, west by Morocco, south by + the desert of Sahara, and east by Tunis. It + extends for about five hundred and fifty miles + along the coast and inland from three hundred + to four hundred miles. Physiographically it + may be roughly divided into three zones,” and + so on for a considerable length until by an + accident which Clarissa could attribute to + nothing but inconceivable awkwardness, Judge + Bording dropped a glass of water, crash! + Having ceased his disquisition at this accident, + so disconcerting to the judge, Miss + Bording very prettily and promptly thanked + him for his information and saying that she + now had a clear understanding of the principal + facts pertaining to Algeria, abruptly changed + the subject by asking him if he had heard anything + more concerning his second cousin, the + barber.</p> + + <p>“There is nothing more to be heard. He is + dead. You know he came here about a week + before I did. By the terms of my uncle’s will, + the five years to be allowed to elapse before I + was to be considered dead or disappeared + <a class="pagenum" id="page165" title="165"> </a>would have come to an end in a week after the + time of my arrival, and the property have + passed to him, my uncle’s cousin. By the + greatest luck in the world, I had become + homesick and throwing up my commission in + the Foreign Legion, or Battalion D’Etranger, + as we have it in French, which is, as you may + know, a corps of foreigners serving under the + French flag, mainly in Algeria, but occasionally + in other French possessions—throwing up + my commission, I came home, bringing with + me my famous collection of weapons and the + fauteuil of Ab del Kader, the armchair, you + understand, of the great Arab prince who led + the last revolt against France. It was not all + homesickness, either. Among the men of all + nationalities serving in the Foreign Legion, + are many adventurous Americans, and a young + Chicagoan, remarking my name, apprised me + of the fact that perhaps I was heir to a fortune + in Chicago. I came,” continued Leadbury, + looking down toward his lap, where Clarissa + saw he held a clipping from a newspaper, “and + took apartments at the Bennington Hotel, + where, when seen by the representatives of the + ‘Commercial Advertiser,’ the following interesting + facts were brought out in the interview: + <a class="pagenum" id="page166" title="166"> </a>‘William Leadbury’—your humble servant—” he + interjected, “‘is the only son of the late + Charles Leadbury, only brother of the late + millionaire iron merchant, James Leadbury. + Upon his death, James Leadbury left his entire + property’—but,” said Leadbury, looking up, + “I have previously covered that point.”</p> + + <p>“But tell us of your weapons,” interposed + Miss Bording.</p> + + <p>“Oh, yes, that seems to interest you,” and + deftly sliding the clipping along in his fingers, + he resumed: “‘The collection of weapons is one + of the most interesting and remarkable collections + in the United States, for, though not + large, its owner can say, with pardonable pride, + “every bit of steel in that collection has been + used by me in my trade.”’”</p> + + <p>“Ah, how proud you must be,” mused Miss + Bording. “I read something like that in the + papers, myself. Just to think of it! Every bit + of steel in that collection has been used by you + in your trade. What a strange affectation you + military men have in calling your profession a + trade! But, Captain Leadbury, tell me of your + cousin, who disappeared two days after your + arrival, and why you shaved your moustache + which the papers described you as having.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page167" title="167"> </a>“A moustache is a bother,” said Leadbury. + “As to my cousin, why, overcome by disappointment, + he took to drink. He disappeared + from his lodgings on Rush Street two days + after my arrival, at the close of a twenty-four + hours’ debauch. It was found he had shipped + as a sailor on the Ingar Gulbrandson, lumber + hooker for Marinette, and the Gulbrandson was + found sunk up by Death’s Door, at the + entrance to Green Bay, her masts sticking + above water. Her crew had utterly disappeared. + That was three months ago and + neither hide nor hair of any of them has been + seen since. Poor Anderson Walkley is dead! + Were he alive, I would be glad to assist him. + But he was a rover, never long in one place—a + few months here, a few months there—and now + he is at rest and I believe he is glad, I believe + he is glad.”</p> + + <p>The second course consisted of turkey, and + Clarissa was astounded, as she deposited the + dishes of the course, to see Asbury Fuller + swiftly enter the door upon all-fours and with + extreme celerity and cat-like lightness, flit + across the room and esconce himself behind a + huge armchair upholstered in velvet, and her + astonishment increased and was tinged with no + <a class="pagenum" id="page168" title="168"> </a>small degree of terror, as she observed the + chair, noiselessly and almost imperceptibly, + progress across the floor, propelled by some + hidden force, until it reached a station behind + the master of the house. Captain Leadbury + began to carve the turkey and Clarissa was + astonished more than ever to hear, in the Captain’s + voice, though she was sure his lips were + shut,</p> + + <p>“Would you like a close shave, Miss Bording?”</p> + + <p>The sound of the carving-knife dropping + upon the platter as Leadbury started in some + sudden spasm of pain, was drowned by the silvery + laughter of Miss Bording, saying,</p> + + <p>“Oh, don’t make fun of the profession of + your poor cousin, Captain,” and the look of + disquiet upon Leadbury’s face was quickly + relieved and he joined heartily and almost + boisterously in the merriment. A moment + later, Clarissa was alarmed to find him bending + upon herself a look in which suspicion, + distrust, fear, and hatred all were blended.</p> + + <p>Judge Volney Bording, ornament to the legal + profession, was a hearty eater, and it was not + long before he sent his plate for a second helping, + and again Clarissa heard from the closed + <a class="pagenum" id="page169" title="169"> </a>lips of Leadbury, in a voice that seemed to + float up from his very feet:</p> + + <p>“Next. Next. You’re next, Miss Bording. + What’ll it be?”</p> + + <p>Leadbury half rose, looking toward Clarissa + with a glance of most violent anger, but whatever + he would have said, was again interrupted + by the silvery laugh of Miss Bording, and again + Leadbury joined heartily, almost boisterously. + But though he regained his self-possession and + his brow became serene, Clarissa saw in his eye + that which told he had a reckoning in store + for her when once the guests were out of the + house, but that in the meantime he would dissemble + the various unpleasant emotions with + which his mind was filled. The rest of the dinner + passed without untoward event. The huge + armchair by imperceptible degrees retired to its + former position, and as Clarissa set down the + dessert, she saw Asbury Fuller, with a grace + unusual and not to be expected of one in such + a posture, proceeding quickly and silently out + of the room upon all-fours.</p> + + <p>Mindful of her instructions, Clarissa accompanied + the party when, rising from the table, + they withdrew to the drawing-room. It was + manifest that her presence caused Leadbury + <a class="pagenum" id="page170" title="170"> </a>some uneasiness and he looked now at her and + now at his guests with an inquiring and perturbed + countenance, but in the calm faces of + the judge and his daughter he could detect + nothing to indicate that they thought the presence + of the page at all strange, and little by + little he recovered his good spirits and related + some interesting anecdotes of a bulldog he + once owned and of a colored person who stole + a guitar from him. But though Miss Bording + gave a courteous and interested attention and + laughed at the anecdotes of the dog, she irked + at the necessity of silence, which the garrulity + of her host placed her under and was desirous + of having the conversation become general + and of a more entertaining, elevated and instructive + character. As the narration of the + episode of the colored person came to an end, + she hastily exclaimed:</p> + + <p>“Captain, you promised to show us your collection. + It is nearing the time when we must + go home, for father has had to-day to listen to + an unparalleled amount of gabble and is very + tired.”</p> + + <p>“I will show the collection to you with great + pleasure,” said Leadbury, and at this juncture, + Clarissa, remembering her instructions, said:</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page171" title="171"> </a>“The collection of your former weapons, sir, + has been placed in the first room at the left at + the head of the stairs. The paperhangers + and decorators have been busy.” And then she + proceeded to lead the way into the hall and up + the broad funereal staircase that led above. + Dimly burned the lights in the hall. Dimly + burned a gas jet in the room whose door stood + open at the left.</p> + + <p>“Oh, yes,” said Leadbury, gaily, responding + to a remark of Miss Bording, as they entered + the room and saw the uncertain shape of a + large chair vaguely looming in the gloom; “I + secured the fauteuil of Ab del Kader after we + had stormed the last stronghold of that unfortunate + prince. But interesting as this relic is, + I put no value upon it in comparison with the + weapons, for every bit of steel in the collection + has been used by me in my trade.”</p> + + <p>As he said these words, he turned on the gas + at full head and the light blazed forth to be + shot back from an array of polished steel festooned + upon the wall, a glittering rosette, but + not of sabres and scimetars, yataghans, rapiers, + broadswords, dirks and poniards, pistols, fusils + and rifles. No! <em>Razors and scissors!</em> Before + this array sat a great red velvet barber’s chair, + <a class="pagenum" id="page172" title="172"> </a>and near them on the wall was a board, bearing + little brass hooks, upon each of which hung a + green ticket.</p> + + <p>In the unexpected revelation that had followed + the flare of light, all eyes were turned + upon William Leadbury, swaying back and + forward with one hand clinging to the big + chair, as if ready to swoon. A sickly, cringing + grin played over his face, suddenly come all + a-yellow, and his long tongue was flickering + over his pale lips. But all at once his muscles + sprang tense and a malignant anger tightened + his quivering features and turning upon Clarissa, + he hissed:</p> + + <p>“You did this. You exposed me, you exposed + me,” and he was about to leap at the + terrified girl, when a ringing voice cried, + “Stop!” and there was Asbury Fuller standing + in the doorway with the broad red cordon + of a Commander of the Legion of Honor across + his breast and a glittering rapier in his hand. + Clarissa could have fallen at his feet, he + looked so handsome and grand, and she could + have scratched out the eyes of Eulalia Bording, + whose gaze betrayed an admiration equal + to her own. Asbury Fuller, yet not wearing + quite his wonted appearance, for the luxuriant + <a class="pagenum" id="page173" title="173"> </a>locks of auburn had gone and his head was + covered with a short, though thick crop of + chestnut.</p> + + <p>“You exposed yourself. Harmless would all + this have been, powerless to hurt you, if you + had kept your self-possession and turned it off + as a joke—your own. But your abashed mien, + your complete confusion, your utter disconcertment, + betrayed you, even if you had no longer + left any question by crying out that you have + been exposed. Yes, exposed, Anderson Walkley, + by the sudden confronting of you with the + implements of your craft, the weapons you had + <em>used</em> in <em>your</em> trade, and the belief thus aroused + in your guilty mind that your secret was + known, that your identity had been detected.”</p> + + <p>“Asbury Fuller, what business is it of + yours?” and Leadbury snatched up a large + pair of hair clippers and waved them with a + menacing gesture.</p> + + <p>“Everyman to the weapons of his trade,” + exclaimed Asbury Fuller, and the hair clippers + seemed suddenly enveloped in a mass of white + flame, as the rapier played about them. + Cling, clang, across the room flew the clippers, + twisted from Leadbury’s hand as neatly as + you please.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page174" title="174"> </a>“Asbury Fuller?” cried the Commander of + the Legion of Honor. “Asbury Fuller?” and + he deftly fastened beneath his nose an elegant + false moustache with waxed ends.</p> + + <p>With his hands before his eyes as if to forefend + his view from some dreadful apparition, + the man in the corner sank upon his knees, + gibbering, “William Leadbury, come back + from the dead!”</p> + + <p>“William Leadbury, alive and well, here to + claim his own from you, Anderson Walkley, + outlaw and felon. Your plans were well-laid, + but I am not dead. You signed the papers of + the Ingar Gulbrandson in your proper person. + Then as she was about to sail, I was brought + aboard ostensibly drunk, but really drugged, + under the name of Anderson Walkley. The + Gulbrandson was found sunk. Her crew of + four had utterly disappeared. Dead, of course. + The records gave their names. I had become + Anderson Walkley and was dead. You had + seized my property and my identity. I had + been in Chicago but two days and no one had + become familiar enough with my appearance to + make any question when you with your clean-shaven + face came down on the morning after + my kidnaping and told the people at the + <a class="pagenum" id="page175" title="175"> </a>hotel that you were William Leadbury and had + shaved your moustache off over night. Whatever + difference they might have thought they + saw, was easily explained by the change occasioned + by the removal of your moustache. + Had your minions been as intelligent as they + were villainous, your scheme would have succeeded. + It was necessary to drug me anew on + the voyage, as the effects were wearing off. + They did not drug me enough, and when they + scuttled the old hulk and rowed ashore to flee + with their blood money, the cold water rising + in the sinking vessel awoke me, brought me + to full consciousness, and I easily got ashore + on some planking. I saw at once what the + plot had been. I realized I had a desperate + man to deal with. I had no money and it + would take me some time to get from northern + Wisconsin to Chicago. In the meantime, + every one would have come to believe you + William Leadbury, and who would believe me, + the ragged tramp, suddenly appearing from + nowhere and claiming to be the heir? You + would be coached by your lawyers, have time + to concoct lies, to manufacture conditions that + would color your claim, and in court you + would be self-possessed and on your guard. + <a class="pagenum" id="page176" title="176"> </a>Therefore I felt that I must await the psychological + moment when you could be taken off + your guard, when, surprised and in confusion, + you would betray yourself. I secured employment + as your butler, the psychological moment + came, and you stand, self-convicted, thief and + would-be murderer.”</p> + + <p>“Send for the police at once,” said Judge + Bording.</p> + + <p>“No,” said the late captain in the Foreign + Legion. “He may reform. I wish him to + have another chance. That he may have the + wherewithal to earn a livelihood, I present him + with the contents of this room, the means of + his undoing. In my uncle’s library are many + excellent theological works of a controversial + nature, and these, too, I present to him, as a + means of turning his thoughts toward better + things. I will not send for the police. I will + send for a dray. Judge Bording, by the recent + concatenation of events, I am become the host. + Let us leave Walkley here to pack his effects, + and return to the drawing-room.”</p> + + <p>Clarissa preceded the others as they slowly + descended, with all her ears open to hear whatsoever + William Leadbury might say to Eulalia + Bording, and it was so that she noted a strange + <a class="pagenum" id="page177" title="177"> </a>little creaking above them, and looking up, + saw poised upon the edge of the balustrade in + the upper hall, impending over the head of + William Leadbury and ready to fall, the great + barber chair! With a swift leap, she pushed + him to the wall, causing him to just escape the + chair as it fell with a dreadful crash. But she + herself was not so fortunate, for with a wicked + tunk the cushioned back of the chair struck + her a glancing blow that felled her senseless + upon the stairs.</p> + + <p>Judge Bording flew after the dastardly barber, + who swifter still, was down the backstairs and + out of the house into the darkness before the + Judge could lay hands upon him.</p> + + <p>The judge, his daughter, and William Leadbury, + bent over the unconscious form of the + page.</p> + + <p>“He saved your life,” said the judge. “The + wood and iron part would have hit your + head.”</p> + + <p>“His breath is knocked out of him,” said + Miss Bording.</p> + + <p>“He saved my life. I cannot understand + his strange devotion. I cannot understand it,” + said William Leadbury, the while opening the + page’s vest, tearing away his collar, and straining + <a class="pagenum" id="page178" title="178"> </a>at his shirt, that the stunned lungs might + have play and get to work again. The stiffly + starched shirt resisted his efforts and he + reached in under it to detach the fastenings of + the studs that held the bosom together. Back + came his hand as if it had encountered a serpent + beneath that shirt front.</p> + + <p>“I begin to understand,” he exclaimed, and + bending an enigmatical look upon the startled + judge and his daughter, he picked the page up + in his arms with the utmost tenderness, and + bore him away.</p> + + <hr class="stars" /> + + <p>The pains in Clarissa’s body had left her. + Indeed, they had all but gone when on Sunday + morning, after a night which had been one of + formless dreams where she had not known + whether she slept or waked or where she was, + a frowsy maid had called her from the bed + where she lay beneath a blanket, fully dressed, + and told her it was time she was getting back + to the city. Not a sign of William Leadbury as + she passed out of the great silent house. Not + a word from him, no inquiry for the welfare of + the little page who had come so nigh dying for + him. Clarissa was too proud to do or say anything + to let the frowsy maid guess that she + <a class="pagenum" id="page179" title="179"> </a>wondered at this or cared aught for the ungrateful + captain. She steeled her heart against + him, but though as the days went by she succeeded + in ceasing to care for one who was so + unworthy of her regard, she could not stifle the + poignant regret that he was thus unworthy.</p> + + <p>It had come Friday evening, almost closing + time in the great store. Slowly and heavily, + Clarissa was setting her counter in order, preparing + to go to her lodgings and nurse her sick + heart until slumber should give respite from + her pain, when there came a messenger from + the dress-making department asking her presence + there.</p> + + <p>“We’ve just got an order for a ready-made + ball-dress for a lady that is unexpectedly going + to the Charity Ball to-night,” said Mrs. McGuffin, + head of the department. “The message + says the lady is just your height and build + and color—she noticed you sometime, it + seems—and that we are to fit one of the + dresses to you, making such alterations as + would make it fit you, choosing one suitable to + your complexion. When it’s done, to save + time, you are to go right to the person who + ordered it, without stopping to change your + clothes. You can do that there. It will make + <a class="pagenum" id="page180" title="180"> </a>her late to the ball, at best. A carriage and a + person to conduct you will be waiting.”</p> + + <p>It was a magnificent dress that was gradually + built upon the figure of Clarissa, and when at + last it was completed and she stood before the + great pier glass flushed with the radiance of a + pleasure she could not but feel despite her + late sorrow and the fact she was but the lay + figure for a more fortunate woman, one would + have to search far to find a more beautiful + creature.</p> + + <p>“Whyee!” exclaimed Mrs. McGuffin. “Why, + I had no idea you had such a figure. Why, I + must have you in my department to show off + dresses on. You will work at the cutlery counter + not a day after to-morrow. But there, I am + keeping you. The ball must almost have + begun. Here’s a bag with your things in it. + I was going to say, ‘your other things.’” And + throwing a splendid cloak about the lovely + shoulders of Miss Clarissa, Mrs. McGuffin + turned her over to the messenger.</p> + + <p>There was already somebody in the carriage + into which Clarissa stepped, but as the curtain + was drawn across the opposite window, she + was unable to even conjecture the sex of the + individual who was to be her conductor to her + <a class="pagenum" id="page181" title="181"> </a>destination, and steeped in dreams which from + pleasant ones quickly passed to bitter, she + speedily forgot all about the person at her + side. But presently she perceived their carriage + had come into the midst of a squadron of + other carriages charging down upon a brilliantly + lighted entrance where men and women, + brave in evening dress, were moving in.</p> + + <p>“Why, we are going to the ball-room itself,” + and as she said this and realized that here on + the very threshold of the entrancing gayeties + she was to put off her fine plumage and see the + other woman pass out of the dressing-room + into the delights beyond, while she crept away + in her own simple garb amid the questioning, + amused, and contemptuous stares of the + haughty dames who had witnessed the exchange, + she broke into a piteous sob.</p> + + <p>“Why, of course to the ball-room, my + darling,” breathed a voice, which low though + it was, thrilled her more than the voice of an + archangel, and she felt herself strained to a + man’s heart and her bare shoulders, which + peeped from the cloak at the thrust of a pair + of strong arms beneath it, came in contact with + the cool, smooth surface of the bosom of a + dress shirt. “Don’t you remember that I engaged + <a class="pagenum" id="page182" title="182"> </a>the second two-step at the Charity + Ball?”</p> + + <p>Clarissa, almost swooning with joy as she + reclined palpitating upon the manly breast of + Captain William Leadbury, said never a word, + for the power of speech was not in her; the + power of song, of uttering peans of joy, perhaps, + but not the power of speech.</p> + + <p>“Have I assumed too much,” said Leadbury, + gravely, relaxing somewhat the tightness of his + embrace. “Have I, arguing from the fact that + you both served me in the crisis of my career + and saved my life, assumed too much in + believing you love me? If so, I beg your pardon + for arranging this surprise. I will release + you. I——”</p> + + <p>“Oh, no,” crooned Clarissa, nestling against + him with all the quivering protest of a child + about to be taken from its mother. “You read + my actions rightly. Oh, how I have suffered + this week. No word from you. I could not + understand it. Of course you could not know + I was a girl. But I thought you ought to be + grateful, even to a boy.”</p> + + <p>“But I did know you were a girl. When + you fell, I began to open the clothes about + your chest. When I discovered your sex, I + <a class="pagenum" id="page183" title="183"> </a>carried you upstairs, placed you on a bed, + threw a blanket over you and was about to call + Miss Bording to take charge of you——”</p> + + <p>“I’m glad you didn’t. I don’t like Miss + Bording,” said Clarissa.</p> + + <p>“I had left to call her, when that poltroon of + an Anderson Walkley, who had stolen back + into the house after running from it, crept + behind me and struck me back of the ear with + a shaving mug. I dropped unconscious. In + the resulting confusion, your very existence + was as forgotten as your whereabouts was unknown. + You lay there as I had left you until + a maid found you in the morning and packed + you off. It was not until Wednesday that I + was able to be out. I knew you came from + this store, and mousing about in there, I had + no trouble in identifying the nice young page + with the beautiful young woman at the cutlery + counter. I could scarce wait two days, but as + three had already passed, I planned this surprise, + remembering our banter when I talked + with you, disguised as a man of fifty, and now + you are to go in with me as my affianced bride. + We’d better hurry, for the driver must be wondering + what we are thinking about.”</p> + + <p>It was worthy of remark that even the ladies + <a class="pagenum" id="page184" title="184"> </a>passed many compliments upon the beauty + and grace of Miss Clarissa Dawson, the young + woman who came to the ball with William + Leadbury, former captain in the army of the + Republique Française, heir to the millions of + the late James Leadbury, and a number of + persons esteemed judges of all that pertains to + the Terpsichorean art, declared that when she + appeared upon the floor for the first time, + which was to dance the second two-step with + the gallant soldier, that such was the surpassing + grace with which she revolved over the + floor that one might well say she seemed to be + dancing upon air.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_11" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page185" title="185"> </a>What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Sixth Gift of the Emir.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">“It is</span> strange,” said Mr. Middleton, + “that after Clarissa had shown her + devotion to the extent of saving his + life, Captain Leadbury could have + had, even for a moment, any misgivings that + she loved him.”</p> + + <p>“One cannot always be sure,” said the + emir. “A lover, being in a highly nervous + state because of his emotion, is always more + or less unstrung and unable to form a sound judgment + or behave rationally. It is because of this, + that there are so many lovers’ quarrels. But + one need not be at sea as regards the question + of the affection of the object of his tender + passion. It is only necessary for you to wear + a philter upon the forehead and you can obtain + the love of any woman,” and giving Mesrour + some directions, the Nubian brought to his + master a minute bag of silk an inch square and + of wafer thinness, which, both from its appearance + and the rare odor of musk which it + exhaled, resembled a sachet bag.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page186" title="186"> </a>“Wear this on your forehead,” said the + emir, presenting it to Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“But I would look ridiculous doing that, + and excite comment,” expostulated the student + of law.</p> + + <p>“Not at all,” said the emir. “Put it inside + the sweat-band of the front of your hat and no + one will perceive it and yet it will have all its + potency.”</p> + + <p>Which, accordingly, Mr. Middleton did, and + having thanked the emir for his entertainment + and instruction and the gift, he departed.</p> + + <p>The close of the relation of the adventure + of Miss Clarissa Dawson left Mr. Middleton in + a most amorous mood. His mind was full of + soft dreams of the delight William Leadbury + must have experienced as he sat in the hack + with Clarissa’s cheek against his, pouring + forth his love into her surprised ear. Before + retiring for the night, he sat for some time + ciphering on the back of an envelope and kept + putting down “$1,000, $500, $560; $560, $500, + $1,000; $500, $560, $1,000; $500, $1,000, + $560,” but as the result of the addition was + never over $2,060, whatever way he put it, and + as the stipend he received for his labors in the + law offices of Brockelsby and Brockman was + <a class="pagenum" id="page187" title="187"> </a>but $26 a month, he did not feel that he had + any business to snatch the young lady of + Englewood to his breast and tell her of his + love and his bank account.</p> + + <p>He went to see her on the following night. + The exquisite beauty of this peerless young + woman had never so impressed him as upon + this night and he was gnawed by the most + intense longing to call her his own. As he + thought of the fortunate William Leadbury + with his rich uncle, he fairly hated him, and + anon he cursed Brockelsby and Brockman for + refusing to raise his salary to a point commensurate + with the value of his services. + Surely, the young lady of Englewood, even + were he to believe her gifted with only ordinary + penetration, instead of being the highly + intelligent and perspicacious person he knew + her to be, could see how he felt and must know + that it was only a question of time and more + money, and assuredly, one so gracious could + not, in view of the circumstances, begrudge + him the advance of one kiss and one embrace + pending the formal offer of himself and his fortunes. + So as he stood in the doorway, bidding + her good-night, right in the midst of an irrelevant + remark concerning the weather, he suddenly + <a class="pagenum" id="page188" title="188"> </a>and without warning, threw his arms + about her and essayed to kiss her. But the + young lady of Englewood, with a cry commingled + of surprise and horror, sprang away.</p> + + <p>“How dare you sir? What made you do + that? What sort of a girl do you think I am?” + she said in freezing tones.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton replied, stuttering weakly in + a very husky voice, “I think you are a nice + girl.”</p> + + <p>“A nice girl!” quoth the young lady of + Englewood fiercely. “You know no nice girl + would allow it. Nice girl, indeed. You think + so. You know no nice girl would let you do + such a thing,” and she slammed the door in + his face.</p> + + <p>Away went Mr. Middleton with his heart + full of bitterness because she would not let him + do such a thing, and in the hallway stood the + young lady of Englewood with her heart full + of bitterness because he had tried to do such a + thing and because she could not let him do + such a thing.</p> + + <p>“Much good was the philter,” said Mr. + Middleton, remembering the emir’s gift, but + almost at the same time, he recalled that the + philter had not been on his forehead when he + <a class="pagenum" id="page189" title="189"> </a>attempted to embrace the young lady of + Englewood, for he had held his hat in his + hand.</p> + + <p>The farther he departed from her, the more + his resentment grew, and he declared to himself + that he would never have anything more + to do with her. She was ungrateful, cold, + haughty, not at all the kind of girl he could + wish as his partner for life. He would proceed + to let her see that he could do without her. + He would cast her image from the temple of + his heart and never go near her again. For a + moment, he was disturbed by the thought that + perhaps she would decline to receive him, even + if he should call, but he quickly banished this + unpleasant reflection and fell to devising means + by which he might make it clearly apparent to + the young lady of Englewood that he did not + care.</p> + + <p>“I’ll make her sorry. I’ll show her I don’t + care, I’ll show her I don’t care.”</p> + + <p>There is a restaurant under the basement of + one of the larger and more celebrated saloons + of the city, where a genial Gaul provides, for + the modest sum of fifty cents, a course dinner, + with wine. The wine is but ordinary California + claret, but the viands are excellently + <a class="pagenum" id="page190" title="190"> </a>cooked and of themselves sufficient inducement + for a wight to part with half a dollar + without consideration of the wine. There are + those who, in the melancholy state that follows + a disappointment in love, go without food and + drink, while others turn to undue indulgence + in drink. There are yet others, though few + observers seem to have noted them, who turn + toward greater indulgence in food, seeking surcease + and forgetfulness of the pains of the + heart in benefactions to the stomach.</p> + + <p>It was very seldom that Mr. Middleton + spent so much as fifty cents upon a meal, but + the conduct of the young lady of Englewood + having deprived him of any present object for + laying up money, and, moreover, the pains of + the heart before alluded to demanding the + vicarious offices of the stomach, he went to the + little French restaurant the next evening.</p> + + <p>It was somewhat late when he arrived and + there were in the room but two diners beside + himself. These were a man and a woman, + who by many little obvious evidences made + manifest that they were not husband and wife. + They had arrived at the dessert and were eating + ice cream with genteel slowness, conversing + the while with great decorum. Both were tall + <a class="pagenum" id="page191" title="191"> </a>and fair, singularly well matched as to height + and the ample and shapely proportions of + their figures, and both were well, though + quietly and even simply, dressed. They were + nearly of an age, too, he being apparently + forty, and she thirty-five. Their years sat + lightly upon them, however, and if upon her + face there were traces left by the longing for + the lover who had not yet come into her life, + that was all which upon either countenance + betrayed that their lives had been other than + care-free and happy. Assuredly, any one + would have called them a fine looking man and + woman. All this Mr. Middleton observed in a + glance or two and then addressed himself to + the comestibles that were set before him and + doubtless would not have given the couple + thought again, had not the waitress at the close + of the meal fluttered at his elbows, placing the + vinegar cruet and Worcestershire sauce bottle + within easy reach, which services caused Mr. + Middleton to look up in some wonder, as he + was engaged with custard pie and he had never + heard of any race of men, however savage, who + used vinegar and Worcestershire sauce upon + custard pie. The waitress, who was a young + woman of a pleasant and intelligent countenance, + <a class="pagenum" id="page192" title="192"> </a>met this glance with another compounded + of mystery and communicativeness, + and bending low while she removed the vinegar + and Worcestershire sauce to a new station, + murmured:</p> + + <p>“That man over there has been here seven + nights running, with a different woman every + time.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton sitting quiet in the surprise + this information caused him, she repeated what + she had said, adding, “and once he was here + at noon besides, different woman every time.”</p> + + <p>Eight women in seven days! Certainly this + was quite a curious thing.</p> + + <p>“Do you know who he is? Have you ever + seen any of the women before?”</p> + + <p>“Nop. Don’t know anything about him + except what I have seen of him here. Never + saw any of the women before—nor since.”</p> + + <p>Nor since. Mr. Middleton found himself + asking himself if anybody had seen any of the + women since. Had the girl in this chance + remark unwittingly hit upon a terrible mystery? + Nor since, nor since.</p> + + <p>The man who had so suddenly assumed an + interest in Mr. Middleton’s eyes, arose, and + going to the window, looked out at the street + <a class="pagenum" id="page193" title="193"> </a>above, which was spattered with a sudden + shower. He began to lament that he had not + brought an umbrella and said he would go + after one, when the storm so increased in + violence that even a person provided with an + umbrella—as was Mr. Middleton—would not + care to venture into it, for such was the might + of the wind now filling the air with its shrieks, + that the rain swept in great lateral sheets which + made an umbrella a futile protection. Yet + notwithstanding this fury of the elements, the + man of many women went out.</p> + + <p>A half hour went by. An hour, and the + storm did not abate and the man did not return. + The good-looking waitress invited Mr. Middleton + to sit at ease by a table in a rear part + of the room, where lolling on the opposite + side, with charming unconsciousness she let + her hand lie stretched more than half across + the board, a rampart of crumpled newspapers + concealing it from the view of the eighth guest + of the mulierose man. But whatever Mr. + Middleton had done on previous occasions and + might do on occasions yet to come, he now + wished to avoid all appearances that might + cause the eighth woman to regard him as at + all inclined to other than discreet and modest + <a class="pagenum" id="page194" title="194"> </a>conduct, for he was resolved to find out what + he could about the man and eight women. So + affecting not to note the hand temptingly disposed, + he discoursed in a voice which was + plainly audible in every corner of the room, + not so much because of its loudness—for he + had but little raised it—as because of a distinct + and precise enunciation. This very precision, + which always implies a regard for the rules, + proprieties and amenities of life, seemed to + stamp him as a man worthy of confidence, + even had not his sentiments been of the most + high-minded character. He described the + great flood of 1882, which wrought such havoc + in Missouri, in which cataclysm his Uncle + Henry Perkins had suffered great loss. He + extolled the commendable conduct of his uncle + in sacrificing valuable property that he might + save a woman; letting a flatboat loaded with + twenty-five hogs whirl away in the raging flood, + in order to rescue a woman from Booneville, + Missouri, the wife of a county judge, who was + floating in the waste of waters upon a small red + barn. The dullest could infer from the approval + he gave this act of his Uncle Henry, unwisely + chivalrous as it might seem in view of + the fact that whoever rescued the judge’s wife + <a class="pagenum" id="page195" title="195"> </a>farther down stream, would return her to the + judge, while no one would return the hogs to + Mr. Perkins—the dullest could infer from his + praise that he was himself a chivalrous and + tender young man whom any woman could + trust.</p> + + <p>The hour was become an hour and a half and + both the pretty waitress and the eighth woman + had grown very fidgetty. The waitress saw + she was to beguile the tedious period of emprisonment + by the tempest with no dalliance + with Mr. Middleton. The eighth woman was + worried by the absence of her escort. Mr. + Middleton stepped to her side, where she stood + staring out at the wind-swept street, and addressed + her.</p> + + <p>“Madame, it would almost seem as if some + accident had detained your escort. May I not + offer to call a cab and see you home? I have + an umbrella with me.”</p> + + <p>The lady thanked him almost eagerly, saying + that she would wait fifteen minutes more and + at the elapse of that time, her escort not appearing, + would gladly avail herself of his kind + offer.</p> + + <p>Twenty minutes later, they were whirling + away northward. Crossing the Wells Street + <a class="pagenum" id="page196" title="196"> </a>bridge, they turned eastward only a few blocks + from the river. The rain had suddenly ceased. + The wind having relaxed nothing of its fierceness, + it occasionally parted the scudding clouds + high over head to let glimpses of the moon + escape from their wrack, and Mr. Middleton + saw he was in a region whence the invasion of + factories and warehouses had driven the major + portion of the inhabitants forth, leaving their + dwellings untenanted, white for rent signs staring + out of the empty casements like so many + ghosts. The lady signaling the driver to stop, + Mr. Middleton assisted her to alight, and + glanced about him. Here the work of exile + had been very thorough. Not yet had the factories + come into this immediate neighborhood, + but the residents had retreated before the + smoke of their advancing lines, leaving a wide + unoccupied space behind the rear guard. Up + and down the street, in no house could he perceive + a light. The moon shining forth clear + and resplendent, its face unobstructed by + clouds for a moment, he saw stretching away + house after house with white signs that grimly + told their loneliness. Indeed, quite deserted + did appear the very house to whose door they + splashed through the pools in the depressions + <a class="pagenum" id="page197" title="197"> </a>of the tall flight of stone steps. The lady + threw open the door and stepped briskly in, + and her footfalls rang sharply upon a bare floor + and resounded in a hollow echo that told it was + an empty house!</p> + + <p>An empty house! An empty house! What + danger might lurk here and how easy might + losels lure victims to their door! Mr. Middleton + paused on the threshold, staring into the + gloom, but whatever irresolute thoughts he had + entertained of retreat were dispelled by the + sound of a wail from the lady, and the sight + of her face, white in the moonlight, as she + rushed out to him.</p> + + <p>“Oh, oh,” she moaned, gibbering a gush of + words which, despite their incoherence of form, + in their tone proclaimed fear, consternation, + and despair.</p> + + <p>Lighting a match, Mr. Middleton stepped + into the house. Standing in the little circle of + dull yellow light, he saw beneath his feet windrows + of dust and layers of newspapers that had + rested beneath a carpet but lately removed, and + beyond, dusk emptiness, and silence. He + advanced, looking for a chandelier, but though + he found two, the incandescent globes had + been removed from them. Throwing a mass + <a class="pagenum" id="page198" title="198"> </a>of the papers from the floor into the grate and + lighting them, a bright glare brought out every + corner of the room. There was nothing but + the four bare walls.</p> + + <p>“They have taken everything, everything!” + cried the poor lady.</p> + + <p>“Who?” asked Mr. Middleton, after the + manner of his profession.</p> + + <p>“Who? Would that I knew!—Thieves.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton then realized she had been + the victim of a form of robbery far too common, + where the scoundrels come with drays + and carry off the whole household equipment, + in the householder’s absence. That which had + been done in comparatively well-populated + quarters was easy of accomplishment on this + deserted street.</p> + + <p>Penetrated with compassion, he moved + toward the unfortunate woman, who with an + abandonment he had not expected of one so + stately and reserved, threw herself upon his + breast, weeping as though her heart would + break.</p> + + <p>“They have taken everything. How can I + get along now! My piano is gone and how + can I give lessons without it! I will have to + go back to Peoria!”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page199" title="199"> </a>Soothingly Mr. Middleton patted the weeping + woman on the back. With infinite tenderness, + he kissed her tear-bedewed cheeks and + gently he laid her head upon his shoulder, and + then with both arms clasped about her, he imparted + to her statuesque figure a sort of rocking + motion, crooning with each oscillation, + “There, there, there, there,” until the paroxysm + of her grief abated and passed from + weeping into gradually subsiding sobs, and he + began to tell her that he would be only too + happy to give his legal services to convict the + villains when caught—as they surely would be. + The lady by degrees becoming more cheerful + and giving him a description of the stolen + property, he discussed ways and means of + recovering it, and to prevent her from relapsing + into her former depressed condition, occasionally + imprinted a consolatory salute upon + her cheek, from which he had previously wiped + the wet tracks of the tears that had now some + time ceased gushing, for there had been a salty + taste to the first osculations, which while not + actually disagreeable, had not been to his + liking.</p> + + <p>At length, the lady not only ceased even to + sigh, but even to talk, and yet remained leaning + <a class="pagenum" id="page200" title="200"> </a>upon him, which was whether because she + was weary, exhausted by grief, or whether + because her supporter was such a good looking + young man, is not evident. Doubtless it was + true that at first her misery and unhappiness + made her need the sympathetic caresses of any + one within reach and that with the return of + her equilibrium she continued to make this an + excuse for enjoying without any reproach of + impropriety a recreation which ordinarily the + conventions of society would compel her to + eschew. As for the rising light in the legal + profession, he began to find the weight she + leant upon him oppressive, and his occupation, + delightful at first, palling and growing monotonous. + The monotony he somewhat relieved by + frequently kissing her, now on one velvet + cheek, now on the other, and again her lips; + slowly, one two, three, in waltz measure; and + rapidly, one, two three, four, in two-step measure, + when all at once in the midst of a sustained + half note there came to him the + reflection that this was no time of night for + him to be there in the dark in a deserted house + kissing a woman with whose social standing, + whose very name, he was unacquainted. He + was about to ask a few leading questions, when + <a class="pagenum" id="page201" title="201"> </a>there was the sound of wheels in the street; a + carriage stopped before the door.</p> + + <p>Quickly extricating himself from the lady’s + arms, Mr. Middleton stepped to the door, only + to see the carriage drive away, the sound of + voices singing a solemn chant in a strange and + unknown tongue floating back to him. Wondering + what all this could mean, he turned to + find the lady standing at his side, silently + regarding him in a wrapt manner.</p> + + <p>“The hour is late,” said she, in a hollow, + mournful voice, “and I ought to be seeking + some shelter where I can lay my head, but + where, oh, where?”</p> + + <p>The lady made a tragic gesture as she asked + this question, and there in that lonely street + with this lorn woman at this late hour of the + night in the eerie light of the cloud-obscured + moon, with the wind, now howling and now + sobbing and moaning, Mr. Middleton felt very + solemn indeed. But he pulled himself together + and suggested a low-priced and respectable + hotel not far away, and toward this they were + faring when they passed a house which, unlike + most of the others of the vicinity, bore signs + of habitation, and unlike any of the others, + had a light showing in a window. In fact, + <a class="pagenum" id="page202" title="202"> </a>there was a light in every window of the two + upper stories and in the windows of the first + floor and even in the basement. Pausing to + wonder at this unusual illumination, Mr. Middleton + felt his arm suddenly clutched, and a + voice which he would never have believed + came from the lady, if there had been any + one else present, grated into his ear, “It’s + him.”</p> + + <p>Though startled by this enigmatical utterance, + he followed when she ascended two steps + of the stoop for a better view in the uncurtained + window. There, with his face buried in + his hands, seated on a roll of carpeting with a + tack hammer and saucer of tacks at his side, + sat the mulierose man!</p> + + <p>“This house was empty at four this afternoon,” + said the lady. “Heavens, that’s my + piano in the corner! That’s my center table! + I believe that’s my carpet! That’s my watercolor + painting I painted myself! <em>He’s</em> robbed + me!”</p> + + <p>Her voice rose to a shriek, and at the sound + a woman’s head popped out of the window + above and the mulierose man came running to + the door. He was in his shirt sleeves but wore + a hat.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page203" title="203"> </a>“You’ve robbed me, you’ve robbed me!” + cried the lady.</p> + + <p>“I haven’t,” said the mulierose man with + the utmost composure. “I can explain it all + satisfactorily. Come in. My Aunt Eliza is + here and tea is ready. Where were you when + I went back to the restaurant? They said you + had gone. Where were you?”</p> + + <p>To Mr. Middleton’s surprise, the lady immediately + quieted at the words of the mulierose + man and instead of berating him, coughed + nervously and hung her head sheepishly.</p> + + <p>“Where were you?” repeated the man.</p> + + <p>“At my house.”</p> + + <p>“All this time? With this young man?” + There was a tinge of hardness and jealousy in + the man’s voice and he looked unpleasantly at + Mr. Middleton. “What did you stay in that + empty house all this time for? What-were-you-doing-there?”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton was at his wit’s end to supply + a hypothesis to answer why the mulierose man, + from being a criminal and object of the lady’s + just wrath, should suddenly have become an + inquisitor, sitting in judgment upon her conduct.</p> + + <p>“I—I—was afraid to start right away. It + <a class="pagenum" id="page204" title="204"> </a>was dark in there and I was afraid this young + man might take liberties. Indeed, he did try + to kiss me.”</p> + + <p>With a roar, the mulierose man launched + himself at Mr. Middleton, who dexterously + stepping aside, had the satisfaction of seeing + his assailant slip and fall on the wet sidewalk. + The lady thereat raised a cry of great volume, + which was taken up by the woman looking out + of the window above, and Mr. Middleton + thinking he could derive neither pleasure nor + profit from remaining longer in that locality, + fled incontinently.</p> + + <p>Upon his arrival home and preparing for + bed, he found that he was wearing a stiff hat + made in Kansas City, bearing on the sweat-band + a silver plate inscribed “George W. + Dobson.” The mulierose man and he had + exchanged hats at the restaurant. The mulierose + man now had the love philter.</p> + + <p>It was not until four days had elapsed that + Mr. Middleton found an opportunity to visit + the street where these inexplicable events took + place. The house where he had comforted + the eighth woman was still empty. At the + house whence the mulierose man had issued, a + very unprepossessing old woman, with a teapot + <a class="pagenum" id="page205" title="205"> </a>in her right hand, was opening the front + door to admit a large yellow cat whom she + addressed as “Mahoney,” an appellation which, + while not infrequently the family name of persons + of Irish birth or descent, is of very seldom + application to members of the domestic + cat tribe, Felis cattus.</p> + + <p>Wondering greatly at the chain of unusual + events, he went about his business. You may + depend upon it that he gave much thought to + an attempted solution of all these mysteries. + But whether or no it was after all only a series + of events commonplace in themselves, but + seeming mysterious because of their fortuitous + concatenation, or he really had trodden upon + the hem of a web of strange and darksome, + perhaps appalling, mysteries, he has never + been able to say. He was minded to speak of + these things to the emir and get his opinion on + them. Upon reflection, remembering how the + philter had not been of any avail in the case of + the young lady of Englewood, he thought, + despite the explanation which might be + offered for this failure, that the emir might be + embarrassed at hearing of the failure of the + charm, and accordingly he said nothing when + once more he sat in the presence of the urbane + <a class="pagenum" id="page206" title="206"> </a>and accomplished prince of the tribe of + Al-Yam. Having handed him a bowl of delicately + flavored sherbet, Achmed began to narrate + The Unpleasant Adventure of the + Faithless Woman.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_12" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page207" title="207"> </a>The Unpleasant Adventure of the Faithless Woman.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">Dr. August Moehrlein</span>, Ph. D., + was a professor of the languages and + religions of India. A man of great + gravity of countenance and of impressive + port, he was popularly reputed to have a + complete knowledge of the occult learning of + the adepts of India, that nebulous and mysterious + philosophy which irreducible to the + laws of nature as recognized by Occidentals, + is by them pronounced either magic and feared + as such, or ridiculed and despised as pretentious + mummery and deluding prestidigitation. + There was a legend among the students of his + department that he was wont to project himself + into the fourth dimension and thus traveling + downtown, effect a substantial saving of + street-car fare. This is clearly impossible, for + the yogis do not thus move about in their own + persons. It is only the astral self that flies + leagues through the air with the rapidity of + thought, only the spiritual essence, the living + man’s ghost flying abroad while the living + <a class="pagenum" id="page208" title="208"> </a>man’s corpse lies inanimate at home. But + even this, Dr. August Moehrlein could not do, + for the yogis do not initiate men of Western + nations into their mysteries. Dr. Moehrlein’s + knowledge of the occult of India was wholly + empirical. He knew that certain things were + done and could recount them, but as to how + they were done, he could tell nothing. It + must not be thought that of all the marvelous + and awe-compelling things the yogis of India + are accustomed to do, none can be assigned to + any other origin than cunning legerdemain and + hypnotism, or to the exercise of supernatural + powers. Many of them are due to a strange + and wonderful knowledge of nature which the + science of the Occident has not yet reached in + all its boasted advance. Yet when once explained, + the Westerner understands some of + these phenomena and is able to repeat them. + Into this region of the penumbra of science and + exact knowledge the researches of Dr. Moehrlein + had taken him a little way and it was this + that had gained him his reputation among his + pupils as a thaumaturgist.</p> + + <p>Along with the learning which this country + has imported from Germany have come some + customs to which the savants of both that + <a class="pagenum" id="page209" title="209"> </a>country and this ascribe a certain fostering + influence, if not a creative impulse, highly + advantageous to the national scholarship. It + is the habit of the university men of Germany + to foregather of nights in the genial pursuit of + drinking beer, and many of the notable + theories which German scholarship has propounded + are to be directly attributed to this + stimulating good fellowship known as kommers. + Indeed, when one has imbibed twelve + or fourteen steins of beer and sat in an atmosphere + of tobacco smoke for some hours, his + mind attains a clarity, a sense of proportion, a + power of reflection, speculation, and intuition + which enables him to evolve those notable + theories for which German scholarship is so + famous. It is under the intellectual stimulus + of the kommers, when the foam lies thick in + the steins and blue clouds of tobacco smoke + roll overhead, that the great classical scholars + of Germany perceive that the classical epics, + the Iliad, the Odyssey, the Aeneid, are but the + typifying of the rolling of the clouds in the + empyrean, the warfare of the foam-crested + waves dashing upon the land, that the metamorphoses + and amours of the gods and all the + myths of the elder world, are but the mutations + <a class="pagenum" id="page210" title="210"> </a>of the clouds and the fanciful figures they + take on and the metamorphoses and hurryings + of the ever-changing sea with its foam forms + and the shadows that lie across its unquiet + surface. Wonderful indeed is the scientific + imagination that thus accounts for, classifies, + and labels the imagination of the poets, which + otherwise we might think a thing defying + classification, an inspiration, a creative genius + taking nothing from a dim suggestion of the + cold clouds and sea, but weaving its tales from + the suggestion of human lives and human passions. + Wonderful indeed is the good sense of + the rest of the world in accepting unquestioned + these important discoveries of German scholars + in the beer kellars, which well might be called + the laboratories of the classical department of + the German universities.</p> + + <p>Dr. August Moehrlein was a staunch advocate + of the advantage of the kommers as an + adjunct to every thoroughly organized university. + If he could not gather others for a kommers, + he would hold a kommers all by himself, + or perchance with the barkeeper. Needless + to say that the name of Moehrlein was attached + to many valuable and plausible theories which + America received as the last word on the subject + <a class="pagenum" id="page211" title="211"> </a>treated; needless to tell you that the + various gods of India had been identified with + the sun, moon, and more important stars, and + that it was conclusively shown that the Sanskrit + romancers had written their tales by + merely looking at the clouds and the sea. + Would that this accomplishment of the ancients + had not gone from us and that the moderns + might write as the ancients by merely + looking at the clouds and the sea. Dr. + Moehrlein was an upholder of the kommers. + But his wife, though German-born, behaved + like a very Philistine and objected to his constant + and unwavering attendance upon these + occasions of intellectual uplift. For as the + doctor added to the knowledge of the world, + he added to his weight. He had identified + Brahma with the sun, but had drunk his face + purple in the intellectual effort. In his search + for the suggestions of the tale of Nala, he had + acquired a paunch very like a bag. Mrs. + Moehrlein was accustomed to shrink from the + approach of the victim of the pursuit of knowledge. + As for him, he would have liked to + caress and fondle her. To him there was + always present a remembrance of her early + beauty and the golden mist of memory shone + <a class="pagenum" id="page212" title="212"> </a>before his eyes and he did not see that she was + a heavy, middle-aged woman with coarse + features and coarse figure. Animal beauty she + had once had. The beauty had utterly flown, + but the animal all remained. She had a shifty + and wandering eye, burned out and lusterless, + that told of dreams that were of men, men who + these many years had not included her husband, + grotesque figure that he was, ugly as a + satyr in one of the myths suggested by the + clouds and the sea.</p> + + <p>It was a pleasant day of the last of May, in + the mating season of birds, when the world was + warm and throbbing with young life. The + eminent Asiatic scholar looked across the + lunch table, regarding his wife with wistful + sadness as she refreshed herself with boiled + cabbage.</p> + + <p>“Do you know the day? It is thirty years + since Hilsenhoff went into the box; thirty + years since we have been man and—woman.”</p> + + <p>“Ah, yes, this is the anniversary. Thirty + years, thirty years. Poor young Hilsenhoff.”</p> + + <p>She said these words with a tinge of sadness + that was almost regret and this did not escape + the doctor.</p> + + <p>“One might fancy you were sorry. Yet it + <a class="pagenum" id="page213" title="213"> </a>was your own doing. I was young and handsome + then. A Hercules, young, full of life, + late champion swordsman of the university, a + rising light in the realm of learning, as well as + a figure in society. You were the beautiful + wife of tutor Hilsenhoff, the buxom girl with + the form of a Venus and the passion of that + goddess as well, tied to a thin, pallid bookworm + ten years your senior, neglecting his + pouting wife with blood full of fire for the + pages of the literature of Hindoostan, prating + of the loves of Ganesha and Vishnu, when a + goddess awaited his own neglectful arms. So + when on the day when he stepped into the + box, leaving us the sole repository of the secret + of his whereabouts—that the mutton-headed + police might not interfere with the success of + his experiment by preventing what they might + think practically suicide—you said to let him + stay.”</p> + + <p>“I was twenty and he thirty,” mused the + woman. “Poor young Hilsenhoff.”</p> + + <p>“Young! I was twenty-three—and a man.”</p> + + <p>“Dead or alive, he is young Hilsenhoff to + me. He was thirty when last I saw him.”</p> + + <p>“Dead or alive? What are you thinking + of?”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page214" title="214"> </a>An idea had been taking shape in the + woman’s mind without her realizing it. It had + grown from her own words, rather than had + the words sprung from the idea.</p> + + <p>“Why, if a man be brought into a condition + where all bodily functions are suspended and + he is as he were dead, and remain in this condition + for months and be brought out of it no + more harmed than if he had slept overnight, + why may it not be years, instead of months? + Has any man ever proved that, in this condition, + one may not live on indefinitely?” she said.</p> + + <p>“No man has ever proved that one cannot, + but what is more important, no man has ever + proved that one can. No man has ever proved + beyond shadow of doubt that one may not + fashion wings and fly, but no man has ever + demonstrated that one can. In India, only + one man has ever tried to continue in a state + of suspended animation for over six months, + and that was the rajah who, condemned to death + by the English, ostensibly died before the soldiers + could come to carry out the sentence and + was brought out of his tomb and restored to + life three days after a new British viceroy had + proclaimed a general amnesty to all past + offenders. The period was eight months. If + <a class="pagenum" id="page215" title="215"> </a>the viceroys had not been changed for a number + of years, we might have learned more concerning + the length of the period in which a man + may continue in the semblance of death without + it becoming reality. No, these twenty-five + years has Hilsenhoff been bones.”</p> + + <p>“Then let us take them out and bury them.”</p> + + <p>“No, no. Then would I feel like a murderer + indeed. I left him in there for you. Now let + his bones rest there for sake of me.”</p> + + <p>But the woman had become possessed of an + idea which in turn possessed her, a dream, for + which like all mankind, she would fight harder + than for any substantiality, for no reality can + be so glorious as a dream.</p> + + <p>“But there was the man at Sutlej, the man + who had himself buried in a wheat field for the + edification of Alexander the Great, there to + remain until a wheat crop had passed through + its stages from sowing until harvest.”</p> + + <p>“The man at Sutlej!” exclaimed the doctor + impatiently. “That a man was thus buried, + the pages of Quintus Curtius’s history show, + and the Macedonian armies suddenly retreating + from India, he was forgotten and not one, + but two thousand wheat harvests have been + garnered over his burial place.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page216" title="216"> </a>“But the article in the <em lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Revue Des Deux + Mondes</em>, telling how he had been found,” + objected the woman faintly.</p> + + <p>The doctor looked at her in amazement.</p> + + <p>“What will not people do to believe that + which they wish to believe. You, you, you!—do + you ask me concerning that lie in the <em lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Revue + Des Deux Mondes?</em> Oh, woman, woman! + When did your memory of the details of that + hoax fail you? Not longer ago than ten minutes. + A lying Frenchman said he was on his way to + France with a resuscitated contemporary of + Alexander the Great and that a full account of + the matter would be published in two or three + months. Hilsenhoff left the duration of his + stay in the box at my discretion, enjoining + me, however, that he should not be taken out + before the Frenchman had published the full + account of the Sutlej case, for we would then + have many interesting comparisons in his + behavior and response to the restorative + methods used, and the reaction and response + of this man buried two thousand years to the + same methods for restoring suspended animation. + The Frenchman never arrived with his + man. It was all a lie. Yet by following + Hilsenhoff’s solemn injunctions to the letter, + <a class="pagenum" id="page217" title="217"> </a>we had an excuse to leave him as dead, and + you insisted that we should do so, and I, weak + and infatuated with your ripe beauty, I agreed. + You said that we would leave him in his self-chosen + sleep and that he should be our lodger. + And so he has been and we have never called + him to breakfast in all these thirty years. We + have even brought him to America with us and + he sleeps. Ah, no, we did not slay him. We + but obeyed his commands.”</p> + + <p>“Poor young Hilsenhoff. And I am his wife + and he is but thirty years old and I am fifty. + Heigho!”</p> + + <p>“Woman, you will drive me crazy,” said the + great annotator of the Upanishads, and he left + for a kommers with the nearest barkeeper.</p> + + <p>“As if you did not drive me crazy, you + obese, misshapen wine skin! you bloated, blue-faced + sot!” said the woman. “I deserted + young Hilsenhoff for you, Hilsenhoff with his + delicate cheeks and his soft yellow hair, and + he is mine and I am his and I will let him out + of the box and we will live together in love, + the dear young thing. What if he does study + sometimes? I shall not mind. He need not + always sit with me in love’s dalliance.”</p> + + <p>All at once it came home to her that if + <a class="pagenum" id="page218" title="218"> </a>Moehrlein maintained the resuscitation of + Hilsenhoff was impossible and charged her + with believing it possible because she wished + to believe it so, it might also be true that he + did not believe it possible because he did not + wish to so believe. The burned out eyes that + told of dreams of men, men who these many + years had not included her husband, smoldered + with a sudden fire. With a song in her heart, + she was up and bustling about. She filled a + brazier with coals and got a frying-pan and + wheat-cake batter, and a razor and a crocheting + hook—ah, she knew how the process of + restoring suspended animation was practised. + She lumbered up into the third story with her + burdens, into the room where slept the + lodger. Not for fifteen years had anyone + looked into that sleeping chamber. The + blinds and curtains, all were drawn, the dust + lay thick under foot. She let in the light of + day at every window. There sat the box in + the middle of the floor, hooped with bands of + iron and with the great seal of the University + of Bonn stamped upon the lock. She broke + the seal and turned the lock and then sank + down in a sudden faintness of heart. Indeed, + how loath she was to put an end to the dream + <a class="pagenum" id="page219" title="219"> </a>that had just now filled her whole being with + rapture, and what else would it be but to put + an end to it when she delved into that box? + She would go away and let herself dream on a + few days more before putting the matter to its + final test, perhaps never doing so. Thus she + reasoned, and yet her hand, as she sat before + the box with averted face, rose as if impelled + by the volition of another intelligence, over + the edge of the box, down to the mass of wool + and wadding, through it to the wrappings and + swathings in the middle, through the wrapping, + and felt—the thrill of unimaginable joy + ran through her. It was not bones, it was not + bones!</p> + + <p>Into the room of the lodger came Dr. August + Moehrlein. The coals of the brazier were out, + the batter had been turned into cakes, the + razor was covered with hair, four waxen plugs + lay by the crocheting hook. The process was + over. The sleeper was awake and there he + stood, his delicate face yet pinched with sleep + and his eyes heavy, but alive and young, + young Hilsenhoff with his soft yellow hair and + mild blue eyes. On the floor before him in an + attitude of adoration, knelt the woman who in + the view of the law, was his wife, her eyes + <a class="pagenum" id="page220" title="220"> </a>burned out no longer, but aflash with youthful + passion. But in her eyes alone was there + youth. Nothing of youthful archness and + coquetry was there in her gaze, only greed, the + sickening fondness of an aging woman for a + young man. In a daze, he stared at her and + heard her clumsy compliments, her vulgar + protestations of love, things which the ripe + beauty of her youth might have condoned, but + now were nauseating. He saw her heavy jowls + and sensual lips, the thick nose and all the + revenges of time upon a once beautiful body + that had clothed an ugly soul. He looked at + his own rusty clothing, stiff and hard and + creased in a thousand wrinkles, and into the + mildewed nest where the mould from the + moisture of his own body grew thick and green + and horrible. He gazed at Dr. Moehrlein, the + one-time Adonis of Bonn, and he shuddered, + and which of what he looked at, or whether + all, made him do so, he could not tell.</p> + + <p>Old men like young women, but so do old + women hanker after young men. The life + companion of Moehrlein embraced Hilsenhoff’s + knees. With smirkings and grimacings and + leers that started his shudders afresh, she told + him all. She confessed her crime and abased + <a class="pagenum" id="page221" title="221"> </a>herself, but now they would begin life again, + and she croaked forth a string of allurements + from a throat that had known too many rich + puddings. Oh, who shall describe her transports! + Never before had every fiber of her + being been so penetrated with joy! A young + husband, oh, a young husband! By as much + as Moehrlein had once surpassed him, did + Hilsenhoff now surpass Moehrlein a hundred + fold. And young, young, young! She was + like to fall on her face in her ecstasy. The + discarded and despised Moehrlein stood by + and paid, if never before, the price of his villainy. + There is a contempt of man for man + and a contempt of woman for woman, but the + contempt of woman for man——</p> + + <p>One sleeps and is unconscious, but nonetheless + by some subtle sense is aware of the passage + of time, and the thirty years that he had + slept, pressed upon young Hilsenhoff and his + soul yearned to take up life again. He looked + at the companions of his youth, that youth + which was still his and had gone from them, + and he looked at the place where he had lain + for a third of a century, thick with damp green + mould. Outside the song of birds was calling + him, the rustle of green leaves and the glorious + <a class="pagenum" id="page222" title="222"> </a>sunlight, the world renewing its life with the + warm throbs of the year’s youth, and putting + from him forever his living grave and the + woman and her paramour, he rushed into the + joyous springtide.</p> + + <p>Now why, my friend, descend into the hell + of repinings and rage and heart-gnawings of + that woman he left behind? Or why tell of the + misery of the learned Dr. Moehrlein? She has + no comfort whatsoever, but the doctor has the + solace of his kommers, so let us wish that his + beer may be forever flat, his wieners mildewy, + and the mustard mouldy like the horrible nest + of young Hilsenhoff.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_13" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page223" title="223"> </a>What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Seventh Gift of the Emir.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">“I did</span> not know that such things were + possible,” said Mr. Middleton, when + Prince Achmed had concluded the + tale of the episode of the two Orientalists + and the faithless woman. “Do I + understand that the person in this condition is + asleep?”</p> + + <p>“It is not consistent with strict scientific + accuracy to say the person is asleep,” said the + emir; “for the vital processes are entirely in + abeyance and the subject is devoid of any evidence + of life. The pulse is still, for the heart + no longer beats and all the blood having + retreated to that inmost citadel of the body, + the skin has the pallor of death. Only in a + little spot upon the crown is there any sign of + life. Here is a place warm to the touch and + the first and most important operation in restoring + the suspended animation, is to send this + vital warmth forth from where it still feebly + simmers, coursing once more through the + <a class="pagenum" id="page224" title="224"> </a>body’s shrunken channels. This is accomplished + by shaving the crown and applying + thereto a succession of piping hot pancakes. + The tongue has been curved back over the + entrance to the throat. You reach into the + mouth and with a finger pull the tongue back + into place. Plugs of wax in the nostrils and + ears are removed, and in a very short time the + subject is as well as ever.”</p> + + <p>“It is very interesting,” murmured Mr. + Middleton.</p> + + <p>“Since you find it so, let me present you + with a little treatise upon the subject written + by a Mohammedan hakim, or doctor of medicine, + after studying several cases of the kind + at Madras, which is in India,” and at his bidding, + Mesrour brought him a small portable + writing desk from which he took a manuscript + scroll inscribed in the Arabic language. “The + first page,” said Prince Achmed, “contains a + few thoughts upon the superiority of the Moslem + faith over all others and a discussion of the + follies, inconsistencies, not to say evils of them + all when compared with that perfect religious + system declared to men by the Prophet of + Mecca,” and having in an orotund voice given + Mr. Middleton some idea of the contents of + <a class="pagenum" id="page225" title="225"> </a>this page by quoting a number of sentences, + the prince handed him the sheet, which was + inscribed upon one side only. The emir continuing + to give a summary of what the hakim + set forth in the remaining pages, and handing + over each sheet as he finished it, Mr. Middleton + wrote in short-hand upon the blank side of + each preceding sheet what the emir culled from + the one following, omitting, of course, the contents + of the first sheet, both because he had + nothing to write upon while the emir was quoting + from that one, and because its theology + was entirely contrary to all Mr. Middleton held, + and, in his eyes, ridiculous and sacrilegious. + When the emir had done, Mr. Middleton had + in his possession a succinct account of the + process of inducing a condition of suspended + animation and of the means of restoring the + subject to his normal state. It was his intention + to write an article from his notes for some + Sunday paper, and putting the hakim’s treatise + in his pocket, and thanking his host for the + entertainment and instruction as well as the + gift, he sought his lodgings.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton had now been admitted to + the bar for some time. But the firm of + Brockelsby and Brockman did not therefore + <a class="pagenum" id="page226" title="226"> </a>raise his salary. They made greater demands + upon his endeavors than before, for he was now + able to handle cases in court, but they did not + raise his salary, nor did they employ him upon + cases where he was able to distinguish himself, + or learn new points of law and gain forensic + ability. He was employed upon humdrum + and commonplace cases that were a vexation + to his spirit without any compensating advantage + of pecuniary reward or experience. + While he felt that his self-respect and on one + hand his self-interests impelled him to resign + his connection with Brockelsby and Brockman, + on the other hand, the very course his employers + pursued made such retirement temporarily + inexpedient. For the trivial cases he handled + could neither gain him reputation enough or + make him friends enough to warrant him in setting + up for himself, nor would they attract the + attention of other firms and result in offers at + an increased salary. He was in a measure + forced to remain with Brockelsby and Brockman, + hoping they would be moved to pay him + according to his worth and dreaming of some + contingency which might place in his hands the + management of an important case with the + resulting enhancing of his reputation.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page227" title="227"> </a>On the morning after he had received the + dissertation of the hakim, Mr. Middleton arose + with the first streak of dawn, minded to seek + the office and write his projected article before + the time for his regular duties should arrive. + As he opened the door of the main office, his + ear was saluted by a low grunting sound, and + there in evening dress was Mr. Augustus + Alfonso Brockelsby, reclining in a big chair, + asleep, if one could with propriety call the + stupor in which he was sunk, sleep. The disorder + of his garments, the character of his + sternutations, the redness of his face, and + above all, the odor he distilled upon the chill + morning air, made patent to Mr. Middleton + the disgusting fact that the senior member of + the firm was drunk. On the table before the + unconscious man was a note from Mr. Brockman + informing him that he had been unexpectedly + called to Lansing, Michigan, and would + not be back for a week and that therefore he, + Brockelsby, would have to attend to the important + case of Ralston versus Hippenmeyer, + all by himself. Mr. Middleton at once set + about bringing his employer into a condition + where he could attend to his affairs, for the + case of Ralston versus Hippenmeyer was a very + <a class="pagenum" id="page228" title="228"> </a>important one indeed, and as Mr. Middleton + had briefed the case himself and had his sympathies + greatly excited for Johannes Hippenmeyer, + he was very anxious that their client + should not lose for default of any effort he + could make. But his heart was heavy as he + brought towels and a basin of cold water from + the wash-room, for after he had done his very + best, Brockelsby would still be far from the + proper form, his brain befogged, his speech + thick, and the counsel for the other side would + make short work of him.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton had never tried to sober a + drunken man, but he had an indistinct recollection + of hearing that a towel wet with cold + water, wrapped around the head was the best + remedial agent. As he soaked the towels, he + could not but compare the difference between + this chill restorative and the hot cakes in the + tale of the emir, and on a sudden there came + to him a thought that sent all the gloom from + his face. He dropped the towels, he dropped + the basin, and he opened the treatise of the + hakim and feverishly refreshed his memory of + the details of an operation sometimes practised + in India.</p> + + <p>An hour and a half had passed when Mr. + <a class="pagenum" id="page229" title="229"> </a>Middleton finished. Mr. Augustus Brockelsby + still sat in the revolving chair, but he was no + longer disturbing the air with his unseemly + grunts. He was, in fact, absolutely silent, + absolutely still. The keenest touch could feel + no pulsation in his wrist, the keenest eye could + detect no agitation of his chest, the keenest ear + could hear no beating from the region of the + heart. For a moment as he gazed upon the + result of following the instructions set down by + the hakim, Mr. Middleton felt a little clutch + of fear. But he was reassured by the lifelike + appearance of the learned jurisconsult and by + the fact that the induction into his present + state had been attended by none of the manifestations + that accompany death.</p> + + <p>“Now,” said Mr. Middleton, addressing the + unconscious form of Augustus Brockelsby, + “now there will be no chance of you appearing + in court in the case of Ralston versus Hippenmeyer. + I will not restore you until it is all + over. I will now have the long coveted opportunity + to plead an important case and as I have + studied it so carefully, I shall win. There will + now be no chance that poor little Hippenmeyer + will suffer from your disgraceful and bestial + habits, for in spite of the best that could be + <a class="pagenum" id="page230" title="230"> </a>done for you, you would be in no fit condition + to plead a case this afternoon. And when I + bring you to at fall of night, you will think you + have been drunk all day. But where will I + keep you in the meantime?”</p> + + <p>This was a most perplexing problem. There + were no closets in the suite of offices. There + were no boxes, no desks big enough to conceal + a man and Mr. Middleton’s brow was beginning to + contract as he struggled with the problem, + when suddenly the stillness of the room + was disturbed by some one smiting the door. + Not a sound made he, for his heart had stopped + beating as completely as Brockelsby’s. What + should he do, what should he do? The + paralysis of fear answered for him and supplied + the best present plan and he did nothing. + Then came a voice, a voice calling him by + name, the voice of Chauncy Stackelberg.</p> + + <p>“Open up, old man, open up. I know you + are there, for I heard you knocking around + before I rapped and you dropped your handkerchief + outside the door. Open up, or I’ll + shin right over the transom, for I must see + you,” and still preserving silence, Mr. Middleton + heard a sound as of a man essaying to + stand on the door knob and grasp the transom + <a class="pagenum" id="page231" title="231"> </a>above. He rushed to the door, unlocked it, + and opening it just enough to squeeze through, + shut it behind him and thrust the key in the lock.</p> + + <p>“Keep still, keep still. You’ll wake the old + man. I can’t let you in.”</p> + + <p>“Was that him, slumped down in the chair? + Must be tired to sleep in that position. Say, + old chap, you were my best man, and now I + want you again.”</p> + + <p>“Want me to draw up papers for a divorce?” + said Mr. Middleton, gloomily. How was he + going to get rid of this inopportune fellow?</p> + + <p>“Shut up,” said Chauncy Stackelberg. “It’s + a boy, and I want you to come up to the christening + next Sunday and be godfather. You + don’t know how happy I am. Say, come on + down and get a drink.”</p> + + <p>Ten minutes before, Mr. Middleton had been + convinced that drink was a very great curse, + but he accepted this invitation with alacrity, + naming a saloon two blocks away as the one + he considered best in that vicinity. He + surmised that the happy father would hardly + offer to come back with him from such a distance, + and the surmise was correct. As he + reascended to the office, with him in the elevator + were two gentlemen, one of whom he + <a class="pagenum" id="page232" title="232"> </a>recognized as Dr. Angus McAllyn, a celebrated + surgeon who had two or three times come to + the office to see Mr. Brockelsby and the other + as Dr. Lucius Darst, a young eye and ear + specialist who within the space of but a few + days had established his office in the building. + To neither of these gentlemen, however, was + Mr. Middleton known.</p> + + <p>“I want you to get off on this floor with + me,” said Dr. McAllyn to his medical confrere. + “I may want your assistance a bit. + You see,” he went on, as they got out of the + elevator and started down the corridor with + Mr. Middleton just behind, “we had a banquet + last night of the Society of Andrew Jackson’s + Wars, and my friend Brockelsby got too much + aboard. He was turned over to me to take to + his home, but just as we were leaving, I + received an urgent call. So the best I could + do was to drive by here and start him toward + his office and go on. He could navigate after + a fashion and doubtless spent the night all + right in his office, and I would take no farther + trouble with him but for the fact that he has an + important case to-day. So I want to fix him + up, and as I haven’t much time, you can be of + service to me.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page233" title="233"> </a>“Ah, ha,” said Mr. Middleton to himself, + “I’ll just lie low until they have given up trying + to get in and have gone.”</p> + + <p>But they did not go away. To his consternation, + they opened the door and walked in, + for though he had put the key in the lock when + he had closed the door behind him to parley + with Chauncy Stackelberg, he had walked away + without turning it! They would find Mr. Brockelsby! + Great though Dr. McAllyn was, he + would hardly be likely to recognize a condition + of suspended animation. Unless Mr. Middleton + confessed, there was danger that the famous + forensic orator would be buried alive. And + if he confessed, what would the consequences + be to himself? The fact that in whatever event + he would lose his place and be a marked and + disgraced man, was the very least thing to consider. + He was threatened with far more serious + dangers than that. First, there would be + the vengeance the law would take upon him + for meddling with and tampering with medical + matters. But even if he had been a physician, + would the medical faculty look otherwise than + with horror upon this rash and wanton experimenting + with the strange and unholy practices + of India? Even a medical man would be + <a class="pagenum" id="page234" title="234"> </a>arrested for malpractice and for depriving a + fellow being of the use of his faculties. The + penitentiary stared him in the face.</p> + + <p>He could not endure not to know what was + taking place within. He must have knowledge + of everything in order to know what moves to + make and when to make them. He let himself + through the outer door of Mr. Brockman’s + private office, and by taking a position by the + door communicating between this office and + the main office, he could hear everything in + safety.</p> + + <p>“Shall I send for an undertaker?” asked Dr. + Darst.</p> + + <p>At these chilling words, Mr. Middleton was + about to open the private office door and rush + in and confess all. He had begun to place the + key in the lock, when a joyful thought stayed + his hand. Let them bury Mr. Brockelsby. + He would dig him up. He laughed noiselessly + in his intense relief. But hark, what does he + hear?</p> + + <p>“Darst, this is an unusual case.”</p> + + <p>“Yes?” said Dr. Darst mildly.</p> + + <p>“A strange, a remarkable case. Darst, if we + do not examine this case, we are traitors to + science. Darst, we must take him to the + <a class="pagenum" id="page235" title="235"> </a>medical school. When we are through, we’ll + sew him all again and bring him back here, or + leave him almost any place where he can be + found easily. He will be just as good to bury + then as now, nobody hurt, and the cause of + science advanced. Observe, Darst, dead, + absolutely dead, yet with no rigor mortis. + Dead, and yet as if he slept. If need be, we + will pursue to the inmost recesses of his being + the secret of his demise.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton was nigh to falling to the + floor. The succession of hope and fear had + taken from him all resolution. Of what use + would it be to exhume Mr. Brockelsby after + the doctors had cut him up? The impulse to + rush in and confess had spent itself and he was + now cravenly drifting with the tide. All judgment, + all power of reflection had departed from + him. He was now only a pitiable wretch with + scarcely strength to stand by the door and + listen, unable to originate any thought, any + action.</p> + + <p>“How are you going to get him out of here?” + asked Dr. Darst.</p> + + <p>“In a box. You don’t suppose I’d carry + him down and put him in a hack?”</p> + + <p>“But suppose they get to looking for him? + <a class="pagenum" id="page236" title="236"> </a>It is known that he came here. A box goes + out of here to be taken to the medical school, + a long box that might hold a man. You and I + are the ones who hire the men who carry the + box.”</p> + + <p>“Who said a long box that might hold a + man? It will be a short, rather tall box, packing-case + shape. Remember, he is as limber + as you are and can be accommodated to any + position. He will be put in it sitting bolt + upright. It will be only half the length of a + man, with nothing in its shape to suggest that + it might hold a man. Who said take it to the + medical school from here? I hire a drayman + to take a box to the Union Depot. He dumps + it there on the sidewalk near the places for + in-going and out-going baggage. Ostensibly + going to carry it as excess baggage. We fiddle + around until he goes, then call up some + other drayman in the crowd hanging about and + take a box just arrived from Milwaukee, St. + Paul, any place the drayman wants to think, + out to the college. As for the inquiry that + will be made concerning the whereabouts of + Brockelsby, rest easy on that point. He frequently + goes off on sprees of several days’ + duration and his absence from home is of such + <a class="pagenum" id="page237" title="237"> </a>common occurrence that his wife won’t begin + to hunt him up until we are through with him + and have got him back here, or have dumped + him in front of some building with his neck + broken, showing that he fell out of some story + above.”</p> + + <p>All this Mr. Middleton heard as he leaned + against the door jamb, swallowing, swallowing, + with never a thing in his mouth since the + night before, yet swallowing. He heard Dr. + Darst go after a box. He heard men deposit + it in the corridor outside. He heard the two + doctors take it in when the men had gone. + He heard it go heavily out into the corridor + again after a long interval. He heard more + men come, come to carry it away, and he + pulled himself together with a supreme effort + and followed. He saw the box loaded on a + dray. With his eye constantly on it, he + threaded his way through the crowd on the + sidewalk, followed it on its way across the + river to the Union Depot. With never a hope + in his heart that anything could possibly occur + to save him from a final confession and its + consequences, humanlike postponing the evil + hour as long as he could.</p> + + <p>The box was dumped upon the sidewalk + <a class="pagenum" id="page238" title="238"> </a>before the depot. The two medical men stood + leaning upon it, waiting for the drayman to + depart. The evil moment had arrived. Once + away from the depot, in the less congested + streets in the direction of the medical college, + the dray would go too fast for him to follow. + He approached. He must speak now. No, + no. He need not follow the dray. That was + not necessary. He could get to the medical + school before they could have time to do + injury to Mr. Brockelsby. It would be safe to + let the box get out of his sight for that little + time. He would tell at the medical college.</p> + + <p>“Yes, as soon as we get him there,” said + Dr. McAllyn, “we’ll put him in the pickle.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton sprang forward and put an + appealing hand upon the shoulder of either + doctor. With a sudden start that caused him + to start in turn, each wheeled about. For a + moment, he could say nothing and stood with + palsied lips while they gave back his stare. + Gave back his stare? All at once his mouth + came open and these were the words he heard + issue forth:</p> + + <p>“Sirs, I arrest you for stealing the body of + Mr. Augustus Alfonso Brockelsby, attorney-at-law.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page239" title="239"> </a>He who had just now been an abject, grovelling + wretch, was of a sudden come to be a lord + among men. The practitioners making no + reply, he continued:</p> + + <p>“Are you going to be sensible enough to + make no trouble, or shall I have to call yonder + officer?”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton considered this quite a master + stroke. By the assumption of a pretended + authority over the neighboring policeman he + would forestall any possibility of resistance + and question as to what authority he represented. + But he need have had no fears on this + score. The doctors were too alarmed to do + otherwise than submit to his pleasure, too + thoroughly convinced that none but a detective + could have had knowledge of the contents + of the box. But Dr. McAllyn did attach a significance + to what Mr. Middleton had said, a significance + natural to one so well acquainted with + the devious ways of the great city as he was.</p> + + <p>“Well,” he said, with a sardonic smile, “you + needn’t call in help. We stand pat. How + much is it going to cost us?”</p> + + <p>Then did Mr. Middleton perceive he was + delivered from a dilemma, a dilemma unforeseen, + but which even if foreseen, he could not + <a class="pagenum" id="page240" title="240"> </a>have forearmed against. After he had arrested + the doctors, how would he have disposed of + them and the box containing Mr. Brockelsby? + How could he have released the doctors and + carried off the box in a manner that would not + excite their suspicions? If he had, in pretended + leniency and soft-heartedness told them + they were free, the absence of any apparent + motive for this action would have instantly + caused them to suspect that for some unknown + and probably unrighteous reason, he desired + possession of the body of Mr. Brockelsby and + thus would ensue a series of complications + that would make the ruse of the arrest but a + leap from the frying pan into the fire. But + now Dr. McAllyn had supplied the motive.</p> + + <p>“Sirs,” said Mr. Middleton, with an air of + virtue that was well suited to the character of + the sentiments he now began to enunciate, + “you deserve punishment. You have been + taken in the act of committing a crime that is + particularly revolting,—stealing a corpse. Dr. + McAllyn, you have been apprehended in foul + treason against friendship. You have stolen + the body of a comrade. You have meditated + cruel and shocking mutilation of this body, + giving to the horror-stricken eyes of the frantic + <a class="pagenum" id="page241" title="241"> </a>widow the mangled and defaced flesh that was + once the goodly person of her husband, leaving + her to waste her life in vain and terrible + speculations as to where and how he encountered + this awful death with its so dreadful + wounds.”</p> + + <p>“It was for the sake of science,” interpolated + Dr. McAllyn, in no little indignation. + “If from the insensible clay of the dead we + may learn that which will save suffering and + prolong existence for the living, well may we + disregard the ancient and ridiculous sentiment + regarding corpses, a relic of the ancient heathen + days when it was believed that this selfsame + body of this life was worn again in another + world.”</p> + + <p>“I will not engage in an antiquarian discussion + with you, sir, as to the origin of this sentiment. + Suffice to say it exists and is one of + the most powerful sentiments that rules mankind. + You have attempted to violate it, to + outrage it. However you may look upon your + action, the penitentiary awaits you. Yet one + can well hesitate to pronounce the word that + condemns a fellow man to that living death. + It is not the mere punishment itself. The + dragging years will pass, but what will you be + <a class="pagenum" id="page242" title="242"> </a>when they have passed? We no longer brand + the persons of convicts, but none the less does + the iron sear their souls and none the less does + the world see with its mind’s eye the scorched + word ‘convict’ on their brows, so long as they + live. In the capacity of judge, were I one, I + might use such limit of discretion as the law + allows in making your punishment lighter or + heavier, but the disgrace of it, no one can + mitigate. Therefore, that you may receive + some measure of the punishment you deserve, + and yet not be blasted for life, I will accept a + monetary consideration and set you free.”</p> + + <p>“Oh, you will, will you?” said Dr. McAllyn. + “How much lighter or heavier will you in your + capacity as judge make this impost?”</p> + + <p>“I will not take my time in replying to your + slurs in kind. You, Dr. McAllyn, as the one + primarily responsible, as the leader who induced + Dr. Darst to enter this conspiracy, as + the one most to be reproached, in that Mr. + Brockelsby was your friend, as the one by far + the most able to pay, you shall pay $1,200. + Dr. Darst shall pay $200. This is a punishment + by no means commensurate with your + crime. By this forfeit, shall you escape prison + and disgrace.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page243" title="243"> </a>“Of course you know that I have no such + sum as that about me,” said Dr. McAllyn. “I + will write you a check.”</p> + + <p>“I am not so green as I look,” said Mr. + Middleton, assuming an easy sitting posture + upon the box containing the mortal envelope + of Mr. Brockelsby. “You may dispatch Dr. + Darst with a check to get the money for you + and himself. You will remain here as a hostage + until his return.”</p> + + <p>Accordingly, Dr. Darst departed and Mr. + Middleton sat engrossed in reflection upon the + chain of unpleasant circumstances that had + forced upon him the unavoidable and distasteful + rôle of a bribe-taker. Yet how else could + he have carried off the part he had assumed? + How else could he have obtained custody of + Mr. Brockelsby? And surely the doctors + richly deserved punishment. It was not meet + that they should go scot free and in no other + way could he bring it about that retribution + should be visited upon them.</p> + + <p>“It is all here,” said Mr. Middleton, + when he had counted the bills brought by Dr. + Darst. “I shall now see that Mr. Brockelsby + is taken back to the office whence you took + him.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page244" title="244"> </a>“Pardon me,” said Dr. Darst, “how in the + world did you know we took him from his + office? How did you ferret it all out?”</p> + + <p>“I cannot tell you that,” said Mr. Middleton. + “I shall take him back to the office. + He will be found there later in the day, just as + you found him. You are wise enough to make + no inquiries concerning him, to watch for no + news of developments. Indeed, to make in + some measure an alibi, should it be needed, + you had better leave town by next train for the + rest of the day. If it were known you were + with Mr. Brockelsby at any time, might it not + be thought that you were responsible for the + condition he was found in?”</p> + + <p>The doctors boarded the very next train, and + Mr. Middleton, serene in the knowledge that + no one would disturb him now, had the box + taken back and set up in the main office. A + slight thump in the box as it was ended up + against the wall, caused Mr. Middleton to + believe that Mr. Brockelsby was now resting + on his head, but he resolved to allow this unavoidable + circumstance to occasion him no disquiet. + Going to a large department store + where a sale of portières was in progress, he + purchased some portières and a number of + <a class="pagenum" id="page245" title="245"> </a>other things. The portières he draped over + the box, concealing its bare pine with shimmering + cardinal velvet and turning it into the + semblance of a cabinet. Lest any inquisitive + hand tear it away, he placed six volumes of + Chitty and a bust of Daniel Webster upon the + top and tacked two photographs of Mr. + Brockelsby upon the front. Confident that no + one would disturb the receptacle containing + his employer, he went into court and after a + short but exceedingly spirited legal battle in + which he displayed a forensic ability, a legal + lore, and a polished eloquence which few of + the older members of the Chicago bar could + have equalled, he won a signal victory.</p> + + <p>Although it was not his intention to set + about restoring Mr. Brockelsby until an hour + that would ensure him against likelihood of + interruption, he returned to the office to see if + by any untoward mischance anybody could + have interfered with the box. To his surprise, + he found Mrs. Brockelsby seated before that + object of vertu with her eye straying abstractedly + over the cardinal portières, the photographs + of Mr. Brockelsby, the bust of Daniel + Webster, and the volumes of Chitty.</p> + + <p>“Oh, Mr. Middleton,” exclaimed the lady. + <a class="pagenum" id="page246" title="246"> </a>“Mr. Brockelsby did not come home to-day + and they tell me he wasn’t in court.”</p> + + <p>“No, he was not in court,” said Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“Oh, where, oh, where can he be!” moaned + Mrs. Brockelsby.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton being of the opinion that this + question was merely exclamatory, ejaculatory + in its nature, of the kind orators employ to + garnish and embellish their discourse and + which all books of rhetoric state do not expect + or require an answer, accordingly made no + answer. He was, nevertheless, somewhat disturbed + by the poor lady’s grief and wished that + it were possible to restore her husband to her + instantly.</p> + + <p>“Oh, I have wanted to see him so, I have + wanted him so! Oh, where can he be, Mr. + Middleton! I must find him. I cannot + endure it longer. I will offer a reward to anyone + who will bring him home within twenty-four + hours, to anyone who will find him. Oh, + oh, oh, oh! I will give $200. I will give it to + you, yourself, if you will find him. Write a + notice to that effect and take it to the newspaper + offices.”</p> + + <p>This great distress on the part of the lady + <a class="pagenum" id="page247" title="247"> </a>was all contrary to what Dr. McAllyn had said + concerning her indifference to the absence of + her spouse and caused Mr. Middleton to feel + very much like a guilty wretch. As he wrote + out the notices for the papers, he reiterated + assurances that Mr. Brockelsby would turn up + before morning, while the partner of the missing + barrister continued her heartbroken wailing + and the cause of it all was driven well-nigh wild.</p> + + <p>“Oh, if you only knew!” she said, as Mr. + Middleton was about to depart for the newspaper + offices. “Day after to-morrow, I am + going to Washington to attend a meeting of + the Federation of Woman’s Clubs. That + odious Mrs. LeBaron is going to spring a + diamond necklace worth two thousand dollars + more than mine. Augustus must come home + in time to sign a check so I can put three thousand + dollars more into mine.”</p> + + <p>A great load soared from Mr. Middleton’s + mind and blithe joy reigned there instead.</p> + + <p>“Mrs. Brockelsby, I’ll leave no stone unturned. + I’ll bring you your husband before + breakfast,” and escorting the lady to her carriage + and handing her in with the greatest + deference and most courtly gallantry, he set + forth for one of the more famous of the large + <a class="pagenum" id="page248" title="248"> </a>restaurants which are household words among + the elite of Chicago. Mr. Middleton had + never passed its portals, but with fourteen + hundred dollars in his pocket and two hundred + more in sight, he felt he could afford to give + himself a good meal and break the fast he had + kept since the evening before, for in the + crowded events of the day, he had found time + to refresh himself with nothing more substantial + than an apple and a bag of peanuts, or + fruit of the Arachis hypogea.</p> + + <p>As he sat down at a table in the glittering + salle-à-manger, what was his great surprise and + even greater delight, to see seated opposite, + just slowly finishing his dessert—a small bowl + of sherbet—habited in a perfectly-fitting frock + coat with a red carnation in the lapel, the + urbane and accomplished prince of the tribe of + Al-Yam. Having exchanged mutual expressions + of pleasure at this unexpected encounter, + Mr. Middleton, overjoyed and elated at the + successes of the day, began to pour into the + ears of the prince a relation of the events that + had resulted from the gift of the treatise of the + learned hakim of Madras, which is in India. + He told everything from the beginning to + the end.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page249" title="249"> </a>“In the morning,” he said in conclusion, “I + take Mr. Brockelsby home in a cab and get + the two hundred dollars.”</p> + + <p>“Alas, alas!” said Achmed mournfully, his + great liquid brown eyes resting sorrowfully + upon Mr. Middleton. “What a corrupting + effect the haste to get rich has upon American + youth. My friend, it cannot be that you intend + to take the two hundred dollars?”</p> + + <p>“But I find old Brock, don’t I?’</p> + + <p>“That is precisely what you do not do. You + know where he is. You put him there. How + can you say you found him?”</p> + + <p>“All right, I won’t do it,” said Mr. Middleton, + abashed at Achmed’s reproof, a reproof + his conscience told him was eminently deserved.</p> + + <p>“I thank Allah,” said the prince, “that I + am an Arab and not an American. The fortunes + of my line, its glories, were not won in + the vulgar pursuits of trade, in the chicanery + of business, in the shady paths of speculation, + in the questionable manipulation of stocks and + bonds. It was not thus that the ancient houses + of the nobility of Europe and the Orient built + up their honorable fortunes. Never did the + men of my house parley with their consciences, + <a class="pagenum" id="page250" title="250"> </a>never did they strike a truce with their knightly + instincts in order to gain gold. Ah, no, no,” + mused the prince, looking pensively up at the + gaily decorated ceiling as he reflected upon the + glories of his line; “it was in the noble profession + of arms, the illustrious practice of warfare + that we won our honorable possessions. At + the sacking of Medina, the third prince of our + house gained a goodly treasure of gold and + precious stones, and founded our fortune. In + warfare with the Wahabees, we acquired countless + herds and the territories for them to roam + upon. By descents across the Red Sea into + the realms of the Abyssinians, we took hundreds + of slaves. From the Dey of Aden we + acquired one hundred thousand sequins as the + price of peace. In the sacking of the cities of + Hedjaz and Yemen and even the dominions of + Oman, did we gallantly gain in the perilous + and honorable pursuit of war further store of + treasure. Ah, those were brave days, those + days of old, those knightly days of old! + Faugh, I am out of tune with this vile commercial + country and this vile commercial + age.”</p> + + <p>The prince arose as he uttered these last + words and in his rhapsody forgetting the presence + <a class="pagenum" id="page251" title="251"> </a>of Mr. Middleton, without a farewell he + stalked through the great apartment, absentmindedly, + though gracefully twirling a pair of + pearl gray gloves in the long sensitive fingers + of his left hand. A little hush fell upon the + brilliant assemblage and many a bright eye + dwelt admiringly upon the elegant person, so + elegantly attired, of the urbane and accomplished + prince of the tribe of Al-Yam.</p> + + <p>For some time Mr. Middleton sat plunged + in abstraction, toying with the three kinds of + dessert he had ordered, as he meditated upon + the words of the emir. At last rousing himself, + he had finished the marrons glacées and + was about to begin upon a Nesselrode pudding, + when he heard himself addressed, and looking + up saw before him a young woman of an exceedingly + prepossessing appearance. She was + richly dressed with a quiet elegance that bespoke + her a person of good taste. Laughing, + roguish eyes illuminated a piquant face in + which were to be seen good sense, ingenuousness + and kindness, mingled with self-reliance + and determination. Mr. Middleton knew not + whether to admire her most for the beautiful + proportions of her figure, the loveliness of her + face, or the fine mental qualities of which her + <a class="pagenum" id="page252" title="252"> </a>countenance gave evidence. With a delightful + frankness in which there was no hint of real + or pretended embarrassment, she said:</p> + + <p>“Pray pardon this intrusion on the part of a + total stranger. I have particular reasons for + desiring to know the name and station of the + gentleman who left you a short time ago, and + knowing no one else to ask, have resolved to + throw myself upon your good nature. I will + ask of you not to require the reasons of me, + assuring you that they are perhaps not entirely + unconnected with the welfare of this gentleman. + I observed from your manner toward + one another that you were acquaintances and + that it was no chance conversation between + strangers. He is, I take it, an Italian.”</p> + + <p>Without pausing to reflect that the emir + might not be at all pleased to have this young + woman know of his identity, Mr. Middleton + exclaimed hastily and with a gesture of expostulation:</p> + + <p>“Oh, no! He is not a Dago,” and then after + a pause he remarked impressively, “He is an + Arab,” and then after a still longer pause, he + said still more impressively, “He is the Emir + Achmed Ben Daoud, hereditary prince of the + tribe of Al-Yam, which ranges on the borders + <a class="pagenum" id="page253" title="253"> </a>of that fertile and smiling region of Arabia + known as Yemen, or Arabia the Happy.”</p> + + <p>“He is not a Dago!” said the young woman, + clasping her hands with delighted fervor.</p> + + <p>“He is not a Dago!” said another voice, and + Mr. Middleton became aware that at his back + stood a second young woman scarcely less + charming than the first. “He is not a Dago!” + she repeated, scarcely less delighted than the + first.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton arose and assumed an attitude + which was at once indicative of proper + deference toward his fair questioners and + enabled him the better to feast his entranced + eyes upon them. Moreover, on all sides he + observed that people were looking at them and + he needed no one to tell him that his conversation + with these two daughters of the aristocracy + was causing the assemblage to regard him as + an individual of social importance. He gave + the emir’s address upon Clark Street and after + dwelling some time upon his graces of person + and mind, related how it was that this Eastern + potentate was resident in the city of Chicago + in a comparatively humble capacity.</p> + + <p>“His brother is shut up in a vermillion + tower.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page254" title="254"> </a>“Vermillion, did you say?” breathlessly + asked the first young lady.</p> + + <p>“Oh, how romantic!” exclaimed the second + young lady. “A tower of vermillion! Is he + good looking, like this one? Do you suppose + he will come here? Oh, Mildred, I must meet + him. And the imam of Oman is going to give + the vermillion tower to the brother, when he + is released. We could send one of papa’s + whalebacks after it. What a lovely house on + Prairie Avenue it would make. ‘The Towers,’ + we would call it. No, ‘Vermillion Towers.’ + How lovely it would sound on a card, ‘Wednesdays, + Vermillion Towers.’ We must get him + out. Can’t we do it?”</p> + + <p>“If it were in this country,” said Mr. Middleton, + “I would engage to get him out. I + would secure a writ of habeas corpus, or devise + other means to speedily release him. But + unfortunately, I am not admitted to practice + in the dominions of Oman. But I do not pity + the young man. One could well be willing to + suffer incarceration in a tower of vermillion, if + he knew he were an object of solicitude to one + so fair as yourself. One could wear the gyves + and shackles of the most terrible tyranny + almost in happiness, if he knew that such + <a class="pagenum" id="page255" title="255"> </a>lovely eyes grew moist over his fate and such + beauteous lips trembled when they told the + tale of his imprisonment.”</p> + + <p>Now such gallant speeches were all very well + in the days of knee-breeches and periwigs, but + in this age and in Chicago, they are an + anachronism and the two young ladies started + as if they had suddenly observed that Mr. + Middleton had on a low-cut vest, or his trousers + were two years behind the times, and somewhat + curtly and coolly making their adieus, + they sailed rapidly away, leaving Mr. Middleton—who + was not the most obtuse mortal in + the world—to savagely fill with large pieces of + banana pie the orifice whence had lately issued + the words which had cut short his colloquy + with the two beauties. He deeply regretted + that in his association with Prince Achmed he + had fallen into a flowery and Oriental manner + of speech and resolved henceforth to eschew + such fashion of discourse.</p> + + <p>The clocks were solemnly tolling the hour of + midnight when Mr. Augustus Alfonso Brockelsby + rubbed his eyes and sat up in the revolving + chair in the main office of his suite. Mr. Middleton + was standing near, hastily putting away a razor. + A warm odor lay on the still air of the room.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page256" title="256"> </a>“Hello, isn’t it daylight yet?” asked Mr. + Brockelsby. The hot cakes that had but lately + been applied to his shaven crown, seemed to + have dispelled the fogs of intoxication and he + was master of himself.</p> + + <p>“It is twelve o’clock,” said Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“Twelve! Why, it was three when I left the + banquet table. Twelve!”</p> + + <p>“Twelve,” said Mr. Middleton, pointing + gravely to the clock on the desk.</p> + + <p>“It—is—twelve. Don’t tell me it is the day + after.”</p> + + <p>“I am compelled to do so. You were at the + banquet of the Sons of Andrew Jackson’s + Wars, twenty-four hours ago.”</p> + + <p>“Great Scott!” exclaimed Mr. Brockelsby, + thrusting his hands through his hair, or rather + making the motion of doing so. “Great + Scott!” he repeated, “I am bald-headed. + What the devil have I been into? Where the + devil have I been?”</p> + + <p>“I found you here this morning. Your wife + has been here.”</p> + + <p>“Oh, lord! Oh, lord! What did she say + when she saw me dead to the world—and bald-headed?”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page257" title="257"> </a>“She did not see you. I had concealed you.”</p> + + <p>“Good boy, good boy.”</p> + + <p>“She offered me two hundred dollars reward + to bring you home,” and Mr. Middleton related + all that Mrs. Brockelsby had said.</p> + + <p>“It would be all off when she saw me bald-headed. + What the devil wouldn’t she suspect? + I don’t know. I would say I didn’t know where + I had been. That would certainly sound + fishy. It would sound like a preposterous + excuse to cover up something pretty questionable. + People don’t go out in good society + and get their heads shaved. She’s pretty independent + and uppish now. She said the next + time she knew of me cutting up any didoes, + she would get a divorce. She comes into two + hundred thousand from her grandfather’s estate + in six months and she’s pretty independent. + Say, my boy, can’t you take a check for the + money she wants? She’s going to Washington + to-morrow. Tell her I went out of town and + sent the money. I <em>will</em> go out of town. But + the boys will see my bald head. Where do + you suppose I was? What sort of crowd was I + with? I must have a wig. You must get it + for me. The boys would josh me to death, + and if the story got to my wife it would be all + <a class="pagenum" id="page258" title="258"> </a>off. I’ll go to Battle Creek and get a new lot + of hair started.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton sat down and wrote busily for + a moment. He handed a sheet of paper to + Mr. Brockelsby.</p> + + <p>“What’s this? You resign? You’re not + going to help me out?”</p> + + <p>“I am no longer in your employ. I will + undertake to do all you ask of me for a proper + compensation, say one hundred and fifty a day + for two days.”</p> + + <p>“What?” screamed Mr. Brockelsby. “This + is robbery, extortion, blackmail.”</p> + + <p>“It is what you often charge yourself. Very + well. Get your own wig and be seen on the + streets going after it. Leave your wife to + wonder why I do not come to report what + progress is made in the search for you and to + start a rigorous investigation herself. I am + under no obligations not to ease her worry, to + calm her disturbed mind by telling her I have + found you. She’ll be hot foot after you then.”</p> + + <p>“She’d spot the wig at once. It would fool + others, but not her. She’d see I had been + jagged. You’ve got me foul. I’ll have to + accede to your terms. You’ll not give me + away?”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page259" title="259"> </a>“Sir, I would not, in this, my first employment + as an independent attorney, be so derelict + to professional honor, as to betray the secrets + of my client. We have chosen to call this + three hundred dollars—a check for which you + will give me in advance—payment for the services + I am about to perform. In reality, I consider + it only part of what you owe for the + miserably underpaid services of the past three + years.”</p> + + <p>As Mr. Middleton wended his way homeward, + it was with some melancholy that he + recalled how, on previous occasions when good + fortune had added to his stock of wealth, he + had rejoiced in it because he saw his dreams of + marriage with the young lady of Englewood + approaching realization more and more. But + now they had drifted apart. Not once had he + seen her since that fatal night. On several + evenings he had made the journey to Englewood + and walked up and down before her + house, but not so much as her shadow on the + curtain had he seen. Let her make the first + move toward a reconciliation. If she expected + him to do so after her treatment of him, she + was sadly mistaken.</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_14" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page260" title="260"> </a>The Adventure of Achmed Ben Daoud.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">Being</span> curious to hear of the young + ladies who had inquired concerning + the emir in the restaurant, and to + learn what their connection with that + prince might be, Mr. Middleton repaired to + the bazaar on Clark Street on the succeeding + night. But the emir was not in. Mesrour + apparently having experienced one of those + curious mental lesions not unknown in the + annals of medicine, where a linguist loses all + memory of one or more of the languages he + speaks, while retaining full command of the + others—Mesrour having experienced such a + lesion, which had, at least temporarily, deprived + him of his command of the English + language, Mr. Middleton was unable to learn + anything that he desired to know, until bethinking + himself of the fact that alcohol + loosens the thought centers and that by its + agency Mesrour’s atrophied brain cells might + be stimulated, revivified, and the coma dispelled, + he made certain signs intelligible to all + <a class="pagenum" id="page261" title="261"> </a>races of men in every part of the world and + took the blackamore into a neighboring saloon, + where, after regaling him with several beers, + he learned that only an hour before an elegant + turnout containing two young women, beautiful + as houris, had called for the emir and taken + him away.</p> + + <p>“He done tole me that if I tole anybody + whar he was gwine, he’d bowstring me and + feed mah flesh to the dawgs.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton shuddered as he heard this + threat, so characteristically Oriental.</p> + + <p>“Where <em>was</em> he going?” he inquired with an + air of profound indifference and irrelevance, + signalling for another bottle of beer.</p> + + <p>The blackamore silently drank the beer, a + gin fizz, and two Scotch high-balls, his countenance + the while bearing evidence that he was + struggling with a recalcitrant memory.</p> + + <p>“’Deed, I doan’ know, suh,” said Mesrour + finally. “He never done tole me.”</p> + + <p>Though Mr. Middleton called three times + during the next week, he did not find the emir + in. Nor could Mesrour give any information + concerning his master’s whereabouts. However, + in the society news of the Sunday papers, + appeared at the head of several lists of persons + <a class="pagenum" id="page262" title="262"> </a>attendant upon functions, one A. B. D. Alyam, + and this individual was included among those + at a small dinner given by Misses Mildred and + Gladys Decatur. As Mildred was the name of + one of the young ladies who had accosted him + in the restaurant, Mr. Middleton felt quite certain + that this A. B. D. Alyam was none other + than Achmed Ben Daoud, emir of the tribe of + Al-Yam.</p> + + <p>On the tenth day, Mesrour informed Mr. + Middleton that the emir had left word to + make an appointment with him for seven + o’clock on the following evening, at which + time Mr. Middleton came, to find the accomplished + prince sitting at a small desk made in + Grand Rapids, Michigan, engaged in the composition + of a note which he was inscribing upon + delicate blue stationery with a gold mounted + fountain pen. Arising somewhat abruptly and + offering his hand at an elevation in continuity + of the extension of his shoulder, the emir + begged the indulgence of a few moments and + resumed his writing. He was arrayed in a + black frock coat and gray trousers and encircling + his brow was a moist red line that told + of a silk hat but lately doffed. “Give the gentleman + a cup of tea,” said he to Mesrour, looking + <a class="pagenum" id="page263" title="263"> </a>up from the note, which now completed, + he was perusing with an air that indicated + satisfaction with its chirography, orthography, + and literary style. At last, placing it in an + envelope and affixing thereto a seal, he turned + and ordering Mesrour to give Mr. Middleton + another cup of tea, he lighted a cigarette and + began as follows:</p> + + <p>“This is the last time you will see me here. + My lease expires to-morrow and my experience + as a retail merchant, in fact, as any sort of + merchant, is over. On this, the last evening + that we shall meet in the old familiar way, the + story I have to relate to your indulgent ears is + of some adventures of my own, adventures + which have had their final culmination in a + manner most delightful to me, and in which + consummation you have been an agent. Indeed, + but for your friendship I should not now + be the happy man I am. Without further consuming + time by a preamble which the progress + of the tale will render unnecessary, I will proceed.</p> + + <p>“Last summer, I spent a portion of the heated + term at Green Lake, Wisconsin. I know that + sentiment in this city is somewhat unequally + divided upon the question of the comparative + <a class="pagenum" id="page264" title="264"> </a>charms of Green Lake and Lake Geneva and + that the former resort has not acquired a vogue + equal to that of the latter, but I must say I + greatly prefer Green Lake. I have never been + at Lake Geneva, it is true, but nevertheless, I + prefer Green Lake.</p> + + <p>“The hotel where I stayed was very well + filled and the manager was enjoying a highly + prosperous season. Yet though there were so + many people there I made no acquaintances in + the first week of my sojourn. Nor in the + second week did I come to know more than + three or four, and they but slightly. I was, + in truth, treated somewhat as an object of + suspicion, the cause of which I could not at + first imagine. I was newer to this country and + its customs and costumes there a year ago. + Previous to starting for the lake, I had purchased + of a firm of clothiers farther up this + street, Poppenheimer and Pappenheimer, a full + outfit for all occasions and sports incident + upon a vacation at a fashionable resort. I had + not then learned that one can seldom make a + more fatal mistake than to allow a clothier or + tailor to choose for you. It is true that these + gentry have in stock what persons of refinement + demand, but they also have fabrics and + <a class="pagenum" id="page265" title="265"> </a>garments bizarre in color and cut, in which + they revel and carry for apparently no other + reason than the delectation of their own perverted + taste, since they seldom or never sell + them. But at times they light upon some one + whose ignorance or easy-going disposition + makes him a prey, and they send him forth an + example of what they call a well-dressed man. + More execrably dressed men than Poppenheimer + and Pappenheimer and most of the + other parties in the clothing business, are seldom + to be found in other walks of life. In my + ignorance of American customs, I entrusted + myself to their hands with the result that my + garments were exaggerated in pattern and + style and altogether unsuited to my dark complexion + and slim figure. But in the wearing of + these garments I aggravated the original sartorial + offence into a sartorial crime. With my + golf trousers and white ducks I wore a derby + hat. For nearly a week I wore with a shirt + waist a pair of very broad blue silk suspenders + embroidered in red. All at once I awoke to a + realization that the others did not wear their + clothes as I did and set myself to imitate them + with the result that my clothes were at least + worn correctly. The mischief was largely done, + <a class="pagenum" id="page266" title="266"> </a>however, before this reform, and nothing I + could do would alter the cut and fabric.</p> + + <p>“My clothes were not the only drawbacks to + my making acquaintances. I was entirely + debarred from a participation in the sports of + the place. I knew nothing of golf. A son of + the desert, I could no more swim than fly, and + so far from being able to sail a boat, I cannot + even manage a pair of oars. I could only + watch the others indulge in their divertissements, + a lonely and wistful outsider.</p> + + <p>“Yet despite all this, I could perceive that I + was not without interest to the young ladies. + Partially as an object of amusement at first, but + not entirely that, even at first, for the sympathetic + eyes of some of them betrayed a gentle + compassion.</p> + + <p>“Among the twenty or so young ladies at our + hotel, were two who would attract the attention + and excite the admiration of any assemblage, + two sisters from Chicago, beautiful as houris. + In face and figure I have never seen their + equal. Their cheeks were like the roses of + Shiraz, their teeth like the pearls of Ormuz, + their eyes like the eyes of gazelles of Hedjaz. + Before beholding these damosels, I had never + realized what love was, but at last I knew, I + <a class="pagenum" id="page267" title="267"> </a>fell violently in love with them both. Never + in my wildest moments had I thought to fall in + love with a daughter of the Franks. Nor had + I contemplated an extended stay in this land, + and before my departure from Arabia I had + begun to negotiate for the formation of a + harem to be in readiness against my return.</p> + + <p>“But I soon began to entertain all these + thoughts and to dally with the idea of changing + my religion, abhorrent as that idea was. At + first I had been comforted by the thought that + I was in love with both girls in orthodox Moslem + style. But reflecting that I could never + have both, that they would never come to me, + that I must go to them, becoming renegade to + my creed, I tried to decide which I loved best. + I came to a decision without any extended + thinking. I was in love with Miss Mildred, + the elder of the two sisters Decatur, daughters + of one of Chicago’s wealthy men, and this + question settled, there remained the stupendous + difficulty of winning her. For I did not + even possess the right to lift my hat to these + young ladies. My affair certainly appeared + quite hopeless.</p> + + <p>“In the last week of August, an Italian and + his wife encamped upon the south shore of the + <a class="pagenum" id="page268" title="268"> </a>lake with a small menagerie, if a camel, a bear, + and two monkeys can be dignified by so large + a title. He was accustomed to make the + rounds of the hotels and cottages on alternate + days, one day mounted on the dromedary and + strumming an Oriental lute, on the others + playing a Basque bagpipe while his bear + danced, or proceeding with hand-organ and + monkeys. He had been a soldier in the + Italian colony of Massowah on the Red Sea, + where he had acquired the dromedary—which + was the most gigantic one I have ever seen—and + a smattering of Arabic. English he had + none, his wife serving as his interpreter in that + tongue.</p> + + <p>“The sight of the camel was balm to my eyes. + Not only was it agreeable to me to see one of + that race of animals so characteristic of my + native land, but here at last was a form of + recreation opened to me. I hired the camel + on the days when the Italian was not using him + and went flying about all over the country. + Little did I suspect that I thereby became associated + with the Italian in the minds of the public + and that presently they began to believe + that I, too, was an Italian and the real owner + of the menagerie, employing Baldissano to + <a class="pagenum" id="page269" title="269"> </a>manage it for me while I lived at my ease at + the hotel. I was heard conversing with the + Italian, and of course nobody suspected that I + was talking to him in Arabic. It was a tongue + unknown to them all and they chose to consider + it Italian. Moreover, one Ashton Hanks, + a member of the Chicago board of trade, at the + hotel for the season, had said to the menagerie, + jerking his thumb interrogatively at me, as I + was busied in the background with the camel, + ‘Italiano? Italiano?’ To which Baldissano + replied, ‘Si, signor,’ meaning ‘yes,’ thinking + of course that Hanks meant him. ‘Boss? + Padrone?’ said Hanks again, and again the + answer was, ‘Si, signor.’</p> + + <p>“So here I was, made out to be an Italian and + the owner of a miserable little menagerie which + I employed a minion to direct, while myself + posing as a man of substance and elegant leisure. + Here I was, already proven a person of + atrocious taste in dress, clearly proclaimed of + no social standing, of unknown and suspicious + antecedents, a vulgarian pretender and interloper. + But of course I didn’t know this at the + time.</p> + + <p>“I was riding past the front of the hotel on + the camel one day at a little before the noon + <a class="pagenum" id="page270" title="270"> </a>hour, when I beheld her whom I loved overcome + by keen distress and as she was talking + rather loudly, I could not but be privy to what + she said.</p> + + <p>“‘Oh, dear,’ she exclaimed, clasping her + hands in great worriment, ‘what shall I do, + what shall I do! Here I am, invited to go on + a sail and fish-fry on Mr. Gannett’s yacht, and + I have no white yachting shoes to wear with + my white yachting dress. I’ve just got to wear + that dress, for I brought only two yachting + dresses and the blue one is at the laundry. + I thought I put a pair of white shoes in my + trunk, but I didn’t; I haven’t time to send to + Ripon for a pair. I won’t wear black shoes + with that dress. But how will I get white + ones?’</p> + + <p>“‘Through my agency,’ said I from where I + sat on the back of the camel.</p> + + <p>“‘Oh,’ said she, with a little start at my unexpected + intrusion, her face lighting with a + sudden hope, nevertheless. ‘Were you going + to Ripon and will you be back before one-thirty? + Are you perfectly willing to do this + errand for me?’</p> + + <p>“‘I am going to Ripon,’ I said, ‘and nothing + will please me more than to execute any + <a class="pagenum" id="page271" title="271"> </a>commission you may entrust to me. This + good steed will carry me the six miles and back + before it is time to sail. They seldom sail on + the time set, I have observed.’</p> + + <p>“She brought me a patent-leather dancing + shoe to indicate the desired size, and away I + went, secured the shoes, and turned homeward. + While skirting a large hill that arises athwart + the sky to the westward of the city of Ripon, + I was startled by a weird, portentous, moaning + cry from my mount. Ah, its import was only + too well known to me. Full many a time had + I heard it in the desert. It was the cry by + which the camels give warning of the coming + of a storm. While yet the eye and ear of + man can detect no signs whatever of the impending + outburst of nature’s forces and the + earth is bathed in the smiles of the sky, the + camels, by some subtle, unerring instinct, + prognosticate the storm.</p> + + <p>“I looked over the whole firmament. Not a + cloud in sight. A soft zephyr and a mellow + sun glowing genially through a slight autumnal + haze. Not a sign of a storm, but the camel + had spoken. I dismounted at once. I undid + the package of shoes. From my pocket I took + a small square bit of stone of the cubical contents + <a class="pagenum" id="page272" title="272"> </a>of a small pea. It was cut from the side + of the cave where Mohammed rested during + the Hegira, or flight of Mohammed, with which + date we begin our calendar. This bit of stone + was reputed to be an efficacious amulet against + dangers of storms, and also a charm against + suddenly falling in love. I placed it in the toe + of the right shoe. Unbeknownst to her, Mildred + would be protected against these dangers. + I could not hope to dissuade her from the + voyage by telling her of the camel’s forewarning. + Ashton Hanks was to be one of the + yachting party and he had shown evidences of + a tender regard for her. Retying the package, + it was not long before I had placed it in the + hands of Mildred. With a most winsome + smile she thanked me and ran in to don the + new purchases.</p> + + <p>“The boat set sail and I watched it glide + westward over the sparkling waves, toward the + lower end of the lake, watching for an hour + until it had slipped behind some point and was + lost to sight. Then I scanned the heavens to + see if the storm I knew must come would + break before it was time for the yachting + party to return. Low on the northern horizon + clouds were mustering, their heads barely discernible + <a class="pagenum" id="page273" title="273"> </a>above the rim of the world. But for + the camel’s warning I would not have seen + them. The storm was surely coming. By six + o’clock, or thereabouts, it would burst. The + party was to have its fish-fry at six, at some + point on the south shore. On the south shore + would be the wreck, if wreck there was to + be.</p> + + <p>“With no definite plan, no definite purpose, + save to be near my love in the threatening + peril, I set out for the south shore. By water, + it is from a mile and a half to three miles + across Green Lake. By land, it is many times + farther. From road to road of those parallel + with the major axis of the lake, it is four miles + at the narrowest, and it is three miles from the + end of the lake before you reach the first north + and south road connecting the parallels. Ten + miles, then, after you leave the end of the lake + on the side where the hotels are, before you are + at the end on the other side. And then thirteen + miles of shore.</p> + + <p>“So what with the distance and the time I had + spent watching the shallop that contained my + love pass from my field of vision the afternoon + had far waned when I had reached the opposite + shore, and when I had descended to the beach + <a class="pagenum" id="page274" title="274"> </a>at a point where I had thought I might command + the most extensive view and discover the + yacht, if it had begun to make its way homeward, + the light of day had given place to twilight. + But not the twilight of imminent night, + the twilight of the coming tempest. For the + brewing of a fearful storm had now some time + been apparent. A hush lay on the land. A + candle flame would have shot straight upward. + Nature waited, silently cowering.</p> + + <p>“To the northward advanced, in serried columns + of black, the beetling clouds that were + turning the day into night, the distant booming + of aërial artillery thundering forth the preluding + cannonade of the charge. Higher and + higher into the firmament shot the front of the + advancing ranks in twisting curls of inky + smoke, yet all the while the mass dropped + nearer and nearer to the earth and the light of + day departed, save where low down in the west + a band of pale gold lay against the horizon, + color and nothing more, as unglowing as a yellow + streak in a painted sunset. Against this + weird, cold light, I saw a naked mast, and then + a sail went creaking up and I heard voices. + They had been shortening sail. By some unspent + impulse of the vanished wind, or the + <a class="pagenum" id="page275" title="275"> </a>impact of the waves still rolling heavily and + glassily from a recent blow, the yacht was still + progressing and came moving past me fifty or + sixty feet from shore.</p> + + <p>“I heard the voices of women expressing terror, + begging the men to do something. Danger + that comes in the dark is far more fearsome + than danger which comes in the light. I heard + the men explaining the impossibility of getting + ashore. For two miles on this coast, a line of + low, but unscalable cliffs rose sheer from the + water’s edge, overhanging it, in fact, for the + waves had eaten several feet into the base of + the cliffs. To get out and stand in front of + these cliffs was to court death. The waves of + the coming storm would either beat a man to + death against the rocks, or drown him, for the + water was four feet deep at the edge of the + cliffs and the waves would wash over his head. + For two miles, I have said, there was a line of + cliffs on this coast, for two miles save just + where I stood, the only break, a narrow rift + which, coinciding with a section line, was the + end of a road coming down to the water. + They could not see this rift in the dusk, perhaps + were ignorant of its existence and so not + looking for it.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page276" title="276"> </a>“The voices I had heard were all unfamiliar + and it was not until the yacht had drifted past + me that I was apprised it was indeed the craft + I sought by hearing the voice of Mildred saying, + with an assumed jocularity that could not + hide the note of fear:</p> + + <p>“‘What will <em>I</em> do? All the other girls have a + man to save them. I am the extra girl.’</p> + + <p>“I drove my long-legged steed into the water + after the boat none too soon, for the whistling + of a premonitory gust filled the air. Quickly + through the water strode the camel, and, with + his lariat in my hand, I plumped down upon + the stern overhang just as the mainsail went + slatting back and forth across the boat and + everybody was ducking his head. In the confusion, + nobody observed my arrival.</p> + + <p>“‘She’s coming about,’ cried the voice of the + skipper, Gannett. ‘A few of these gusts + would get us far enough across to be out of + danger from the main storm.’</p> + + <p>“But she did not come about. I could feel + the camel tugging at the lariat as the swerving + of the boat jerked him along, but presently the + strain ceased, for the boat lay wallowing as + before. Again a fitful gust, again the slatting + of the sail, the skipper put his helm down + <a class="pagenum" id="page277" title="277"> </a>hard, the boat put her nose into the wind, hung + there, and fell back.</p> + + <p>“‘She won’t mind her helm!’</p> + + <p>“‘She won’t come about!’</p> + + <p>“‘She acts as if she were towing something, + were tied to something!’</p> + + <p>“‘What’s that big rock behind there? Who + the devil is this? And how the devil did he + get here?’</p> + + <p>“In the midst of these excited and alarmed + exclamations came the solemn, portentous + voice of the camel tolling out in the unnatural + night the tocsin of the approaching hurricane.</p> + + <p>“‘It’s the Dago!’ cried Gannett, examining + me by the fleeting flash of a match. ‘It’s his + damned camel towing behind that won’t let us + come about. Pitch him overboard!’</p> + + <p>“‘Oh, save me!’ appealed Mildred.</p> + + <p>“There she had been, sitting just in front of + me and I hadn’t known it was she. It was not + strange that she had faith that I who had + arrived could also depart.</p> + + <p>“‘Selim,’ I called, pulling the camel to the + boat. I had never had a name for him before, + but it was high time he had one, so now I + named him. ‘Selim,’ and there the faithful + beast was and with Mildred in my arms, I + <a class="pagenum" id="page278" title="278"> </a>scrambled on to his back and urged him toward + the rift in the wall of cliff.</p> + + <p>“As if I had spurned it with my foot, the + boat sprang away behind us, a sudden rushing + blast filling her sails and laying her almost + over, and then she was out of our sight, into + the teeth of the tempest, yelling, screaming, + howling with a hundred voices as it darted + from the sky and laid flat the waves and then + hurled them up in a mass of stinging spray.</p> + + <p>“In fond anticipation, I had dwelt upon the + homeward ride with Mildred. A-camelback, + I was, as it were, upon my native heath, master + of myself, assured, and at ease. I had + planned to tell her of my love, plead my cause + with Oriental fervor and imagery, but before + we reached shore the tempest was so loud that + she could not have heard me unless I had + shouted, and I had no mind to bawl my love. + Worse still, when once we were going across + the wind and later into it, I could not open my + mouth at all. We reached the hotel and on its + lee side I lifted her down to the topmost of the + piazza steps. I determined not be delayed + longer. If ever there was to be a propitious + occasion, it was now when I had rescued her + from encompassing peril. I retained hold of + <a class="pagenum" id="page279" title="279"> </a>her hand. She gave me a glance in which was + at least gratitude, and I dared hope, something + more, and I was about to make my declaration, + when she made a little step, her right foot + almost sunk under her and she gave an agonized + cry and hobbling, limping, hopping on one + foot, passed from me across the piazza to the + stairs leading to the second story, whither she + ascended upon her hands and knees.</p> + + <p>“That wretched stone from the cavern where + Mahommed slept in the Hegira! How many + times during the day had she wanted to take + her shoe off? She would ascertain the cause + of her torment, she would lay it to me. It had + indeed been an amulet against sudden love. I + was the man whose love it had forefended.</p> + + <p>“‘Gannett’s yacht went down and all aboard + of her were drowned,’ said one of the bellboys + to me. ‘Everybody in the hotel is feeling + dreadful.’</p> + + <p>“‘How do you know they are drowned?’</p> + + <p>“‘Everybody in the hotel says so. I don’t + know how they found out.’</p> + + <p>“‘What’s that at the pier?’ said I.</p> + + <p>“The lights at the end of the pier shone + against a white expanse of sail and there was a + yacht slowly making a landing.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page280" title="280"> </a>“Someone came and stood for a moment in + an open window above me and there floated + out the voice of one of the sisters Decatur, but + which one, I could not tell. Their voices were + much alike and I had not heard either of them + speak very often.</p> + + <p>“‘Do you think that one ought to marry a + person who rescues her from death, when he + happens to be a Dago and cheap circus man + into the bargain? I certainly do not.’</p> + + <p>“Which one was it? Which one was it? + Imagine my feelings, torn with doubt, perplexity, + and sorrow. Was it Mildred, replying + scornfully to some opinion of her sister, or was + it the sister taking Mildred to task for saying + she wished or ought to marry me? How was I + to know? Could I run the risk of asking the + girls themselves?</p> + + <p>The emir paused, and it was plain to be seen + from the workings of his countenance that once + more he was living over this unhappy episode.</p> + + <p>“I can well imagine your feelings and sympathize + with them,” said Mr. Middleton. + “There you sat in the encircling darkness, + asking yourself with no hope of an answer, + ‘Was it Mildred? Was it her sister? Was it + Mildred contemptuously repudiating the idea + <a class="pagenum" id="page281" title="281"> </a>of marriage with me, or the sister haughtily + scoffing at some sentiments just professed by + Mildred? But I should not have spent too + long a time asking how I was to know. I + should put the matter to the test and had it + out with Mildred, Miss Mildred, I should + say.”</p> + + <p>The emir looked steadily at Mr. Middleton. + There was surprise, annoyance, perhaps even + vexation in his gaze. With incisive tones, he + said:</p> + + <p>“How could you so mistake me? Ours is a + line whose lineage goes back twelve hundred + years, a noble and unsullied line. Could I, sir, + think of making my wife, making a princess of + my race, a woman who could entertain the + thought of stooping to marry a Dago cheap + circus man? Suppose I had gone to Mildred + and had asked her if she had expressed herself of + such a demeaning declaration? Suppose she + had said, ‘Yes,’ then there I would have been, + compromised, caught in an entanglement from + which as a man of honor, I could not withdraw. + The only thing to do was to keep + silence. The risk was too great, I resolved to + leave on the morrow. For the first time did I + learn that I was believed to be a Dago and the + <a class="pagenum" id="page282" title="282"> </a>proprietor of the little menagerie. This + strengthened my resolve to leave.</p> + + <p>“I left. Your happy encounter with the + young ladies in the restaurant changed all. + They learned from you that I was their social + equal. They looked me up and apologized for + their apparent lack of appreciation of my services + and explained that they thought me a + Dago circus man. I learned that neither of + them believed in a mesalliance, that the question + I had heard was a rhetorical question + merely, one not expecting an answer, much + used by orators to express a strong negation of + the sentiments apparently contained in the + question. But I have not yet learned which + girl it was who asked the question. It is + entirely immaterial and I don’t think I shall + try to find out, even after I am married, for of + course you have surmised I am to be married, + to be married to Mildred.”</p> + + <p>“Yes, another American heiress marries + a foreign nobleman,” said Mr. Middleton, + with a bitterness that did not escape the + emir.</p> + + <p>“Permit me to correct a popular fallacy,” + said the emir. “Nothing could be more erroneous + than the prevalent idea that American + <a class="pagenum" id="page283" title="283"> </a>girls marry foreign noblemen because attracted + by the glitter of rank, holding their own plain + republican citizens in despite. Sir, it takes a + title to make a foreigner equal to American + men in the eyes of American women. A British + knight may compete with the American + mister, but when you cross the channel, nothing + less than a count will do in a Frenchman, + a baron in the line of a German, while, for a + Russian to receive any consideration, he must + be a prince.</p> + + <p>“And now,” said the emir, “my little establishment + here being about to be broken up, I + am going to ask you to accept certain of my + effects which for sundry reasons I cannot take + with me to my new abode. My jewels, hangings, + and costumes, my wife will like, of + course. But as she is opposed to smoking, + there are six narghilehs and four chibouques + which I will never use again. As I am about + to unite with the Presbyterian church this coming + Sunday, it might cause my wife some disquietude + and fear of backsliding, were I to + retain possession of my eight copies of the + Koran. She may be wise there,” said the emir + with a sigh. “If perchance you should embrace + the true faith and thereby make compensation + <a class="pagenum" id="page284" title="284"> </a>for the loss of a member occasioned by + my withdrawal——”</p> + + <p>“That would not even matters up,” interrupted + Mr. Middleton, “for I am not a Presbyterian, + but a Methodist.”</p> + + <p>“Oh,” said the emir. “Well, there are five + small whips of rhinoceros hide and two gags. + My wife will not wish me to keep those, nor a + crystal casket containing twenty-seven varieties + of poisons. Then there are other things that + you might have use for and I have not. I + have sent for a cab and Mesrour will stow the + things in it.”</p> + + <p>At that moment the cab was heard without + and Mesrour began to load it with the gifts of + the emir. At length he ceased his carrying + and stood looking expectantly. With an air of + embarrassment, and clearing his throat hesitatingly, + the emir addressed Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“There is one last thing I am going to ask + you to take. I cannot call it a gift. I can + look upon your acceptance of it in no other + light than a very great service. Some time + ago, when marriage in this country was something + too remote to be even dreamed of, I sent + home for an odalisque.”</p> + + <p>The emir paused and looked obliquely at + <a class="pagenum" id="page285" title="285"> </a>Mr. Middleton, as if to observe the effect of + this announcement. That excellent young + man had not the faintest idea what an odalisque + might be, but he had ever made it a point when + strange and unknown terms came up, to wait + for subsequent conversation to enlighten him + directly or by inference as to their meaning. + In this way he saved the trouble of asking + questions and, avoiding the reputation of being + inquisitive and curious, gained that of being + well informed upon and conversant with a wide + range of subjects. So he looked understandingly + at the emir and remarking approvingly, + “good eye,” the emir continued, much encouraged.</p> + + <p>“To a lonely man such as I then was, the + thought of having an odalisque about, was very + comforting. Lonely as I then was, an odalisque + would have afforded a great deal of + company.”</p> + + <p>“That’s right,” said Mr. Middleton. “Why, + even cats are company. The summer I was + eighteen, everybody in our family went out to + my grandfather’s in Massachusetts, and I + stayed home and took care of the house. I + tell you, I’d been pretty lonely if it hadn’t + been for our two cats.”</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page286" title="286"> </a>“But now I am going to be married and my + wife would not think of tolerating an odalisque + about the house. She simply would not have + it. The odalisque arrived last night, and I am + in a great quandary. I could not think of + turning the poor creature out perhaps to + starve.”</p> + + <p>“That’s right,” said Mr. Middleton. “Some + persons desiring to dispose of a cat, will carry + it off somewhere and drop it, thinking that + more humane than drowning it. But I say, + always drown a cat, if you wish to get rid of it.”</p> + + <p>“Now I have thought that you, being without + a wife to object, might take this burden off + my hands. I will hand you a sum sufficient + for maintenance during a considerable period + and doubtless you can, as time goes on, find + someone else who wants an odalisque, or discover + some other way of disposal, in case you + tire——”</p> + + <p>“Send her along,” said Mr. Middleton, + cordially and heartily. “If worst comes to + worst, there’s an old fellow I know who sells + parrots and cockatoos and marmosets, and perhaps + he’d like an odalisque.”</p> + + <p>“I will send her,” said the emir.</p> + + <p>“So it’s a she,” quoth Mr. Middleton to himself. + <a class="pagenum" id="page287" title="287"> </a>He had used the feminine in the broad + way that it is applied indefinitely to ships, + railways trains, political parties etc., etc., with + no thought of fitting a fact.</p> + + <p>“I will give you fifteen hundred dollars for + her maintenance. Having brought her so far, + I feel a responsibility——”</p> + + <p>“But that is such a large sum. I really + wouldn’t need so much——”</p> + + <p>“That is none too large,” rejoined the emir. + “I wish her to be treated well and I believe + you will do it. At first, she will not understand + anything you say to her, of course, but + she will soon learn what you mean. The tone, + as much as the words, enlightens, and I think + you will have very little trouble in managing + her.”</p> + + <p>“Is there a cage?” hazarded Mr. Middleton, + “or won’t I need one?”</p> + + <p>“Lock her in a room, if you are afraid she + will run away, though such a fear is groundless. + Or if you wish to punish her, the rhinoceros + whips would do better than a cage. A cage is + so large and I could never see any advantage + in it. But you will probably never have occasion + to use even a whip. You will have but + this one odalisque. Had you two or three, + <a class="pagenum" id="page288" title="288"> </a>they might get to quarreling among themselves + and you might have use for a whip. But toward + you, she will be all gentleness, all submission.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton and the emir then turned to + the counting and accounting of the fifteen hundred + dollars, and so occupied, the lawyer + missed seeing Mesrour pass with the odalisque + and did not know she had been put in the hack + until the emir had so apprised him.</p> + + <p>“She is in a big coffee sack,” said the emir. + “The meshes of the fabric are sufficiently open + to afford her ample facility for breathing, and + yet she can’t get out. Then, too, it will simplify + matters when you get to your lodgings. + You will not have to lead her and urge her, + frightened and bewildered by so much moving + about, but pack her upon your back in the bag + and carry her to your room with little trouble.</p> + + <p>“And now,” continued the emir, grasping + Mr. Middleton’s hands warmly, “for the last + time do I give you God-speed from this door. + I will not disguise my belief that our intimacy + has in a measure come to an end. As a married + man, I shall not be so free as I have been. + I am no longer in need of seeking out knowledge + of strange adventures. The tyrannical + imam of Oman, who imprisoned my brother, is + <a class="pagenum" id="page289" title="289"> </a>dead, and his successor, commiserating the + poor youth’s sorrows, has not only liberated + him, but given him the vermillion edifice of his + incarceration. This my brother intends to + transmute into gold, for he has hit upon the + happy expedient of grinding it up into a face + powder, a rouge, beautiful in tint and harmless + in composition, for the rock was quarried in + one of the most salubrious locations upon the + upper waters of the great river Euphrates. I + trust I shall sometimes see you at our place, + where I am sure I shall be joined in welcoming + you by Mrs.—Mrs.—well, to tell the truth,” + said the emir in some slight confusion, “I + don’t know what her name will be, for it is + obviously out of the question to call her Mrs. + Achmed Ben Daoud, and she objects to the + tribal designation of Alyam, which I had temporarily + adopted for convenience’s sake, as + ineuphonious.”</p> + + <p>“Sir, friend and benefactor, guiding lamp + of my life, instructor of my youth and moral + exemplar,” said Mr. Middleton, in the emotion + of the moment allowing his speech an + Oriental warmth which the cold self-consciousness + of the Puritan would have forbade, had he + been addressing a fellow American, “I cannot + <a class="pagenum" id="page290" title="290"> </a>tell you the advantages that have flowed from + my acquaintance with you. It was indeed the + turning point of my life. The pleasure I will + leave untouched upon, as I must alike on the + present occasion, the profits. Let me briefly + state that they foot up to $3760. A full + accounting of how they accrued, would consume + the rest of the night, and so it must be + good-bye.”</p> + + <p>As Mr. Middleton looked back for the last + time upon that hospitable doorway, he saw the + gigantic figure of Mesrour silhouetted against + the dim glow beyond and there solemnly + boomed on the night air, the Arabic salutation, + “Salaam aleikoom.”</p> +</div> +<div id="chapter_15" class="chapter"> + <h2><a class="pagenum" id="page291" title="291"> </a>What Befell Mr. Middleton Because of the Eighth and Last Gift of the Emir.</h2> + + <p class="first_paragraph"><span class="first_word">Getting</span> into the hack and settling into + the sole remaining vacant space Mesrour + had left in loading the vehicle + with the emir’s gifts, Mr. Middleton + was so preoccupied by a gloomy dejection as + he reflected that a most agreeable, not to say + inspiring and educating, intimacy was at last + ended, that he reached his lodgings and had + begun to unload his new possessions, before he + thought of the odalisque. There lay the coffee + sack lengthwise on the front seat and partially + reclining against the side of the carriage. He + was greatly surprised at the size of the unknown + creature and began to surmise that it + was an anthropoid ape, though before his speculations + had ranged from parrots through dogs + to domesticated leopards. Leaving the coffee + sack until the last, he gingerly seized the slack + of the top of the bag and proceeded to pull it + upon his shoulders, taking care to avoid holding + the creature where it could kick or struggle + <a class="pagenum" id="page292" title="292"> </a>effectually, for despite all the emir had told + him of the gentleness of the odalisque, he was + resolved to take no chances. Whatever the + creature was, she had slid down, forming a + limp lump at the end of the bag, when he + charily deposited it on the floor and turned to + consult his dictionary before untying it. He + was going to know what the creature was + before he dealt with her further, a creature so + large as that.</p> + + <p><em>Odalisque.</em> A slave or concubine in a Mohammedan + harem!!</p> + + <p>A woman!!!</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton tore at the string by which + the bag was tied, full of the keenest self-reproach. + The uncomfortable position during + the long ride, the worse position in which she + now lay. The knots refused to budge and + snatching a knife, with a mighty slashing, he + ripped the bag all away and disclosed the + slender form of a woman crouched, huddled, + collapsed, face downward, head upon her + knees. Turning her over and supporting her + against his breast in a sitting posture, Mr. + Middleton looked upon the most loveliness, + unhappiness, and helplessness he had ever + beheld.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page293" title="293"> </a>For a moment his heart almost stopped as he + looked into the still face, but he saw the bosom + faintly flutter, slow tears oozed out from under + the long lashes of the closed lids, and the + cupid’s bow mouth gave little twitches of misery + and hopelessness. With what exquisite + emotions was he filled as he looked down upon + the head pillowed upon his breast, with what + sentiments of anger, with what noble chivalry!</p> + + <p>A Moslem woman. A Moslem woman, who + even in the best estate of her sex as free and a + wife, goes to her grave like a dog, with no + hope of a life beyond, unless her husband amid + the joys of Paradise should turn his thoughts + back to earth and wish for her there among his + houris. But this poor sweet flower had not + even this faint expectation, for she was no wife + nor could be, slave of a Mohammedan harem. + No rights in this world nor the next. Not even + the attenuated rights which law and custom + gave the free woman. No sustaining dream of + a divine recompense for the unmerited unhappiness + of this existence. A slave, a harem + slave, wanted only when she smiled, was gay, + and beautiful; who must weep alone and in + silence, in silence, with never a sympathetic + shoulder to weep upon after they sold her from + <a class="pagenum" id="page294" title="294"> </a>her mother’s side. Tied in a bag, going she + knew not whither, thrown in a carriage like so + much carrion, in these indignities she only + wept in silence, for her lord, the man, must not + be discomposed. Like the timorous, helpless + wild things of the woods whose joys and sorrows + must ever be voiceless lest the bloody + tyrants of their domain come, who even in the + crunch of death hold silence in their weak + struggles, this poor young thing bore her sufferings + mutely, for her lord, the man, must not be + discomposed, choking her very breath lest a + sob escape. Mr. Middleton, in a certain illuminating + instinct which belongs to women but + only occasionally comes to some men, saw all + this in a flash without any pondering and turning + over and reflecting and comparing, and he + said to himself under his breath, not eloquently, + but well, as there came home to him + the heinousness of that abhorrant social system + dependent upon the religious system of the + Prophet of Mecca, “Damn the emir and Mohammed + and the whole damned Mohammedan + business, kit and boodle!”</p> + + <p>In this imprecation there was a piece of + grave injustice which Mr. Middleton would not + have allowed himself in calmer mood, for the + <a class="pagenum" id="page295" title="295"> </a>emir was about to become a member of one of + the largest and most fashionable Presbyterian + congregations in the city and ought not to have + been included in an anathema of Moslemry and + condemned for anything he upheld while in the + benighted condition of Mohammedanism.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton continuing to gaze, as who + could not, upon that beautiful unhappy face, + suddenly he imprinted upon the quivering lips + a kiss in which was the tender sympathy of a + mother, the heartening encouragement of a + friend, and the ardent passion of a lover. The + odalisque opened her lovely hazel eyes and + <em>seeing</em> corroboration of all the <em>touch</em> of the + kiss had told her, as she looked into eyes + that brimmed with tears like hers, upon lips + that quivered like hers, she let loose the flood + gates of her woes in a torrent of sobs and tears, + and throwing herself upon his shoulders, poured + out her long pent sorrows in a good cry.</p> + + <p>It was only a summer shower and the sun + soon shone. She did not weep long. Too + filled with wonder and surpassing delight was + this daughter of the Orient in her first experience + with the chivalry of the Occident. She + must needs look again at this man whose eyes + had welled full in compassion for her. She + <a class="pagenum" id="page296" title="296"> </a>would court again his light and soothing + caresses, his gentle ministrations, so different + from the brutal pawing of the male animals of + her own race, the moiety with souls. Ah, how + poignantly sweet, how amazing, that which to + her American sisters was the usual, the commonplace, + the everyday!</p> + + <p>She raised her head. Her tears no longer + flowed, but her lips still quivered, in a pleading + little smile; and her bosom still fluttered, in a + shy and doubting joy, and in her mind floated + a half-formed prayer that the genii whose craft + had woven this rapturous dream, would not too + soon dispel it.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton gazed at her. He had never + seen a face like that, so perfectly oval; never + such vermillion as showed under the dusk of + her cheeks and stained the lips, narrow, but + full. What wondrous eyes were those, so + large and lustrous, illumining features whose + basal lines of classic regularity were softly + tempered into a fluent contour. A circlet of + gold coins bound her brow, shining in bright + relief against the luxuriant masses of chestnut + hair. A delicate and slender figure had she, + yet well cushioned with flesh and no bones + stood out in her bare neck.</p> + + <p><a class="pagenum" id="page297" title="297"> </a>Moved not by his own discomfort on the + hard floor, but by the possible discomfort of + the odalisque, Mr. Middleton at length raised + her and conducted her to a red plush sofa + obtained by the landlady for soap wrappers and + a sum of money, which having turned green in + places and therefore become no longer suitable + for a station in the parlor, had been placed in + this room a few days before. Upon this imposing + article of furniture the two sat down, and + though at first Mr. Middleton did no more than + place his arm gently and reassuringly about the + girl’s waist and hold her hand lightly, in the + natural evolution, progression, and sequence + of events, following the rules of contiguity and + approach—rhetorical rules, but not so here—before + long the cheek of the fair Arab lay + against that of the son of Wisconsin and her + arm was about his neck and every little while + she uttered a little sigh of complete, of unalloyed + content. What had been yesterday, + what might be to-morrow, she was now happy. + As for Mr. Middleton, what a stream of delicious + thoughts, delicious for the most part + because of their unselfishness and warm generosity, + flowed through his head. What a joy it + would be to make happy the path of this girl + <a class="pagenum" id="page298" title="298"> </a>who had been so unhappy, to lay devotion at + the feet of her who had never dreamed there + was such a thing in the world, to bind himself + the slave of her who had been a slave.</p> + + <p>Then, too, he luxuriated in the simple, elementary + joy of possession and the less elementary + joy of possession of new things, whether + new hats, new clothes, new books, new horses, + new houses, or new girls, and which is the + cause why so many of us have new girls and + new beaux. And when he looked ahead and + saw only one logical termination of the episode, + he swelled with a pride that was honest + and unselfish, as he thought how all would look + and admire as he passed with this lovely + woman, his wife.</p> + + <p>He could have sat thus the whole night + through, but the girl must be tired, worn by + the sufferings of this day and many before. + He motioned toward the bed and indicated by + pantomime that she should go to it. She + would have descended to her knees and with + her damask lips brushed the dust from his + shoes, if she had thought he wished it, but she + knew not what he meant by his gesturing and + sat bewildered in eager and anxious willingness. + So arranging the bed for her occupancy, + <a class="pagenum" id="page299" title="299"> </a>he took her in his arms and bore her to it and + dropped her in. The riotous blushes chased + each other across her cheeks as she lay there + with eyes closed, so sweet, so helpless, so + alone.</p> + + <p>For a little season he stood there gazing, + gloating, enravished, like to hug himself in the + keen titillation of his ecstasy and this was not + all because this lovely being was his, but + because he was hers.</p> + + <p>Glancing about the room preliminarily to + leaving, and wondering what further was to be + done for the girl’s comfort and peace of mind, + he bethought him of an ancient tale he had + once read. In this narration, fate having + made it unavoidable that a noble lord should + pass the night in a castle tower with a fair + dame of high degree and there being but one + bed in the apartment, he had placed a naked + sword in the middle of the bed between them + and so they passed the night, guarded and + menaced by the falchion, for the nonce become + the symbol of bright honor and cold virtue. + Mr. Middleton had often wondered why the + knight did not sleep on the floor, or outside + the door, as he himself now intended doing. + But it occurred to him that some such symbol + <a class="pagenum" id="page300" title="300"> </a>might reassure the Arab damosel and having + no sword, he drew one of the large pistols the + emir had given him and approached the bed + to lay it there.</p> + + <p>The girl’s eyes had now opened and Mr. + Middleton started as he beheld her face. Once + more the hunted, helpless look it had worn + when first he had looked on it. But more. + Such an utter fear and sickening unto death. + But not fear, terror for herself. Fear for the + death of an ideal, a fear caused by her misinterpretation + of his intent with the pistol. It + had not been real, it had not been real. He + was as other men, the men of her world and all + the world was alike and life not worth living. + With a finesse he had not suspected he possessed, + he laid the pistol on a pile of legal + papers on a table at the bed’s head, a pile + whose sheets a suddenly entering breeze was + whirling about the room. How obvious it was + he had brought the pistol for a paper weight. + Once more the girl was smiling as he drew the + clothes over her, all dressed as she was, and + kissing shut her drowsy eyes, he left her in her + virginal couch.</p> + + <p>On the mat before the door in the hallway + without, he disposed himself as comfortably as + <a class="pagenum" id="page301" title="301"> </a>he could. With due regard for the romantic + proprieties, he tried to keep within the bounds + of the mat. But it was too short, his curled + up position too uncomfortable, and so he overflowed + it and could scarcely be said to be sleeping + on the mat. It was too late to arouse the + landlady and although he was there by choice, + it could not have been otherwise.</p> + + <p>After snatches of broken sleep, after dreams + waking and dreams sleeping, which were all + alike and of one thing and indistinguishable, + he was at length fully awake at a little before + six and aware of an odor of tobacco smoke. + Applying his nose to the crack of the door, he + finally became convinced that it came from his + room. Wondering what it could possibly + mean, and accordingly opening the door, opening + it so slowly and gradually that the odalisque + could have ample time to seek the cover + of the bed clothes, he stepped in.</p> + + <p>There sat the odalisque on the edge of the + bed, fully dressed, puffing away at his big + meerschaum, blowing clouds that filled the + room. On the table lay an empty cigarette + box that had been full the night before. This + had not belonged to Mr. Middleton, who was + not a cigarette smoker and despised the practice, + <a class="pagenum" id="page302" title="302"> </a>but had been forgotten by Chauncy + Stackelberg on a recent visit. The fingers of + her right hand were stained yellow, not by the + cigarettes of that one box, but the unnumbered + cigarettes of years. Mr. Middleton had not + noticed these fingers the night before, but had + been absorbed by her face, and this as beautiful, + as piquant, as bewitching as before, looked + up at him, the lips puckered, waiting, longing.</p> + + <p>He stood there, stock-still, stern, troubled, + dismayed.</p> + + <p>She moved over, where she sat on the edge + of the bed, with mute invitation, and Mr. Middleton + continuing to stand and stare, she moved + again and yet again, until she was against the + headboard. And still he did not sit beside + her, thinking all the time of the young lady of + Englewood whose pure Puritan lips never had + been and never could be defiled by cigarettes + and tobacco. The young lady of Englewood, + the young lady of Englewood, what a jewel of + women was she and what a fool he had been + and how unkind and inconsiderate! Recalled + by a little snuffle from the odalisque, he saw + the puckered lips were relaxing sorrowfully + and fearing the girl would cry, he hastily sat + down beside her and put his right arm about + <a class="pagenum" id="page303" title="303"> </a>her. But he did not take the shapely hand + that now laid down the meerschaum, and + though her head fell on his shoulder and her + breath came and went with his, he did not kiss + her, for that breath was laden with tobacco. + Nor did his fingers stray through those masses + of silken hair, for he was sure they were full of + the fumes of tobacco. There with his arm + about the soft, uncorsetted form of that + glorious beauty, her own white forearm smooth + and cool about his neck, he was thinking of the + young lady of Englewood.</p> + + <p>Poor odalisque! Why cannot he speak to + you and tell you? You would wash away those + yellow stains with your own blood, if you + thought he wished it. Forego tobacco? Why, + you would cease to inhale the breath of life + itself, for his sake.</p> + + <p>Out of the grave came all the dead Puritan + ancestors of Mr. Middleton, a long procession + back to Massachusetts Bay. The elders of + Salem who had ordained that a man should not + smoke within five miles of a house, the lawgivers + who had prescribed the small number, + brief length, and sad color of ribbons a woman + might wear and who forbade a man to kiss his + wife on Sunday, all these righteous and uncomfortable + <a class="pagenum" id="page304" title="304"> </a>folk stirred in Mr. Middleton’s + blood and obsessed him.</p> + + <p>Fatima, Nouronhor, or whatever your name + might be, my fair Moslem, why did fate throw + you in with a Puritan? Yet I wot that had it + been one from a strain of later importation + from Europe, you had not been so safe there + last night. The Puritans may be disagreeable, + but they are safe, safe.</p> + + <p>Part of this Mr. Middleton was saying over + and over to himself—the latter part. The + Puritans are safe. The young lady of Englewood + was safe. She was good, she was beautiful, + too, in her calm, sweet, Puritan way. He + must see her at once, he would go—— A sigh, + not altogether of content, absolute and complete, + recalled to him the woman pressed + against his side. She must be taken care of, + disposed of. Asylum? No. Factory? No, + no. Theater, museum? No, no, no. He + would find some man to marry her. There + must be someone, lots of men, in fact, who + would marry a girl so lovely, who needn’t find + out she smoked until after marriage, or who + would not care anyway. All this might take + time. He would be as expeditious as possible, + however. He called Mrs. Leschinger, + <a class="pagenum" id="page305" title="305"> </a>the landlady, and entrusting the girl to her + care, departed to visit a matrimonial agency he + knew of.</p> + + <p>He looked over the list of eligibles. He + read their misspelled, crabbedly written letters. + There was not one in the lot to whom a man + of conscience could entrust the Moslem flower, + even if she did smoke.</p> + + <p>“There is apparently not one man of education + or refinement in the whole lot,” exclaimed + Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“That’s about right,” said the president of + the agency. “Between you and I, there ain’t + many people of refinement who would go at + marrying in that way. You don’t know what + a lot of jays and rubes I have to deal with. + Often I threaten to retire. But occasionally a + real gentleman or lady does register in our + agency. Object, fun or matrimony. Now I + have one client that is all right, all right except + in one particular. He is a man of thirty-five + or six, fine looking, has a nice house and five + thousand dollars a year clear and sure. But + he’s stone deaf. He wants a young and handsome + girl. Now I could get him fifty dozen + homely young women, or pretty ones that + weren’t chickens any longer, real pretty and + <a class="pagenum" id="page306" title="306"> </a>refined, but you see a real handsome young + girl sort of figures her chances of marrying are + good, that she may catch a man who can hear + worth as much as this Crayburn, which ain’t a + whole lot, or that if she does marry a poor + young chap, he’ll have as much as Crayburn + does when he is as old as Crayburn. Now I’m + so sure you’ll only have your trouble for your + pains, that I won’t charge you anything for his + address and a letter of introduction. I don’t + believe you have got a girl who will suit, for if + you have, she won’t take Crayburn. Here’s + his picture.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton looked upon the photograph + of a man who seemed to be possessed of some + of the best qualities of manhood. It was true + that there was a slight suspicion of weakness in + the face, but above all it was kindly and sympathetic.</p> + + <p>“A good looking man,” said Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“Smart man, too,” said the matrimonial + agent. “He graduated from the university in + Evanston and was a lawyer and a good one, + until a friend fired off one of those big duck + guns in his ear for a joke.”</p> + + <p>Taking the odalisque with him in a cab, Mr. + <a class="pagenum" id="page307" title="307"> </a>Middleton was off for the residence of Mr. + Crayburn.</p> + + <p>“Will she have me?” asked Mr. Crayburn, + when he had read Mr. Middleton’s hastily + penciled account of the main facts of his connection + with the fair Moslem, wherein for + brevity’s sake he had omitted any mention of + the fifteen hundred dollars the emir had given + him for assuming charge of her.</p> + + <p>“Of course,” wrote Mr. Middleton.</p> + + <p>“I never saw a more beautiful woman,” exclaimed + Mr. Crayburn. “By the way, have + you noticed any predilections, habits, wants, + it would be well for me to know about?”</p> + + <p>“She smokes,” wrote Mr. Middleton, not + knowing why he wrote it, and wishing like the + devil that he hadn’t the moment he had.</p> + + <p>“All Oriental women smoke. I will ask her + not to as soon as she learns English.”</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton was amazed to think that + such a simple solution had not occurred to + him. But he was glad it was so, for he had + not been unscathed by Cupid’s darts there last + night and he might not now be about to visit + the young lady of Englewood.</p> + + <p>“Your fee,” said Mr. Crayburn.</p> + + <p>Mr. Middleton had not thought of this. He + <a class="pagenum" id="page308" title="308"> </a>looked about at the handsomely furnished + room. He thought of the five thousand dollars + a year and the very much smaller income + he could offer the young lady of Englewood. + He thought of these things and other things. + He thought of the young lady of Englewood; + of the odalisque, toward whom he occupied + the position of what is known in law as next + friend. She sat behind him, out of his sight, but + he saw her, saw her as he saw her for the first + time, when, ripping the bag away, she lay there + in her piteous, appealing helplessness.</p> + + <p>“There is no fee. The maiden even has a + dowry of fifteen hundred dollars. Please + invest it in her name. Oh, sir, treat her + kindly.”</p> + + <p>“Treat her kindly!” exclaimed the deaf man + with emotion. “He would be a hound who + could ill treat one so helpless and friendless, a + stranger in a strange land, whose very beauty + would be her undoing, were she without a protector.”</p> + + <p>Much relieved, Mr. Middleton prepared to + depart and the odalisque saw she was not to be + included in his departure. She noted the + luxurious appointments of the house, so different + from the threadbare and seedy furnishings + <a class="pagenum" id="page309" title="309"> </a>of Mr. Middleton’s one lone room, but rather + a thousand times would she have been there. + A tumult of yearning and love filled her heart, + but beyond the slow tears in her eyes and the + trembling lips, no one could have guessed it. + Once more she was a Moslem slave, sold by + the man whom last night she had thought——She + bowed to kismet and strangled her feelings + as she had so many times before. And + so after a shake of the hand, Mr. Middleton + left her, left her to learn as the idol of Mr. + Crayburn’s life, with every whim gratified, that + the first American she had known was but one + of millions.</p> + + <p>Away toward Englewood hastened Mr. Middleton, + reasoning with himself in a somewhat + casuistical manner. His conscience smote him + as he thought of the previous night. But + what else could anybody have done? Deprived + of the power of communicating by the means + of words, he had by caresses assuaged her + grief and stilled her fears and now it was too + plain he had made her love him and he had + left her in desolation. But heigho! what was + the use of repining over spilled milk and nicotined + fingers that another man and good would + care for, and he himself had not been unscathed + <a class="pagenum" id="page310" title="310"> </a>by Cupid’s darts there the night + before.</p> + + <p>The young lady of Englewood was just putting + on her hat to go out and was standing + before the mirror in the hallway. Mr. Middleton + had never called at that hour of the + day. For months he had not called at all and + she never expected that he would again. So + without any apprehension at all, she was wearing + one of the green silk shirt waists she had + made from the Turkish trousers he had given + her, and had just got her hat placed to suit + her, when there he was!</p> + + <p>She turned, blushing furiously. Whether it + was the confusion caused her by being discovered + in this shirt waist, or the joy of seeing + him again and the complete surrender, she + made in this joy, so delectable and unexpected + and which was not unmixed with a little fear + that if he went away this time, he would never + come back again, never! whether it was these + things or what not, she made no struggle at all + as Mr. Middleton threw his arms about her, + threw them about her as if she were to rescue + him from some fate, and though he said nothing + intelligible for some time, but kissed her + lips, cheeks, and nose, which latter she had + <a class="pagenum" id="page311" title="311"> </a>been at pains to powder against the hot sun + then prevailing, she made no resistance at all + and breathed an audible “yes,” when he + uttered a few incoherent remarks which might + be interpreted as a proposal of marriage.</p> + + <p>Here let us leave him, for all else would be + anti-climax to this supreme moment of his + life. Here let us leave him where I wish every + deserving bachelor may some day be: in the + arms of an honest and loving woman who is + his affianced wife.</p> +</div> +<div id="the_end"> </div> + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Strange Adventures of Mr. Middleton, by +Wardon Allan Curtis + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STRANGE ADVENTURES MR. 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