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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Talking Horse, by F. Anstey
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Talking Horse
+       And Other Tales
+
+Author: F. Anstey
+
+Release Date: November 16, 2008 [EBook #27284]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TALKING HORSE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Clarke, Martin Pettit and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This
+file was produced from images generously made available
+by The Internet Archive/Canadian Libraries)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+THE TALKING HORSE
+
+ETC.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+THE TALKING HORSE
+
+AND OTHER TALES
+
+
+BY
+
+F. ANSTEY
+
+AUTHOR OF 'VICE VERSÂ' 'THE GIANT'S ROBE' 'THE PARIAH' ETC.
+
+SECOND EDITION
+
+LONDON
+SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 WATERLOO PLACE
+1892
+
+[_All rights reserved_]
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE
+
+
+These stories originally appeared in 'Macmillan's,' 'Longman's,'
+'Atalanta,' 'The Cornhill,' 'The Graphic,' 'Aunt Judy's,' 'The
+Reflector,' and Unwin's 'Christmas Annual,' respectively.
+
+                                                         F. A.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+                                 PAGE
+THE TALKING HORSE                   1
+
+THE GOOD LITTLE GIRL               39
+
+A MATTER OF TASTE                  72
+
+DON; THE STORY OF A GREEDY DOG    127
+
+TAKEN BY SURPRISE                 151
+
+PALEFACE AND REDSKIN              176
+
+SHUT OUT                          234
+
+TOMMY'S HERO                      250
+
+A CANINE ISHMAEL                  274
+
+MARJORY                           286
+
+
+
+
+_THE TALKING HORSE_
+
+
+It was on the way to Sandown Park that I met him first, on that horribly
+wet July afternoon when Bendigo won the Eclipse Stakes. He sat opposite
+to me in the train going down, and my attention was first attracted to
+him by the marked contrast between his appearance and his attire: he had
+not thought fit to adopt the regulation costume for such occasions, and
+I think I never saw a man who had made himself more aggressively horsey.
+The mark of the beast was sprinkled over his linen: he wore snaffle
+sleeve-links, a hard hunting-hat, a Newmarket coat, and extremely tight
+trousers. And with all this, he fell as far short of the genuine
+sportsman as any stage super who ever wore his spurs upside down in a
+hunting-chorus. His expression was mild and inoffensive, and his watery
+pale eyes and receding chin gave one the idea that he was hardly to be
+trusted astride anything more spirited than a gold-headed cane. And yet,
+somehow, he aroused compassion rather than any sense of the ludicrous:
+he had that look of shrinking self-effacement which comes of a recent
+humiliation, and, in spite of all extravagances, he was obviously a
+gentleman; while something in his manner indicated that his natural
+tendency would, once at all events, have been to avoid any kind of
+extremes.
+
+He puzzled and interested me so much that I did my best to enter into
+conversation with him, only to be baffled by the jerky embarrassment
+with which he met all advances, and when we got out at Esher, curiosity
+led me to keep him still in view.
+
+Evidently he had not come with any intention of making money. He avoided
+the grand stand, with the bookmakers huddling in couples, like hoarse
+lovebirds; he kept away from the members' inclosure, where the Guards'
+band was endeavouring to defy the elements which emptied their vials
+into the brazen instruments; he drifted listlessly about the course till
+the clearing-bell rang, and it seemed as if he was searching for some
+one whom he only wished to discover in order to avoid.
+
+Sandown, it must be admitted, was not as gay as usual that day, with its
+'deluged park' and 'unsummer'd sky,' its waterproofed toilettes and
+massed umbrellas, whose sides gleamed livid as they caught the
+light--but there was a general determination to ignore the unseasonable
+dampness as far as possible, and an excitement over the main event of
+the day which no downpour could quench.
+
+The Ten Thousand was run: ladies with marvellously confected bonnets
+lowered their umbrellas without a murmur, and smart men on drags shook
+hands effusively as, amidst a frantic roar of delight, Bendigo strode
+past the post. The moment after, I looked round for my incongruous
+stranger, and saw him engaged in a well-meant attempt to press a currant
+bun upon a carriage-horse tethered to one of the trees--a feat of
+abstraction which, at such a time, was only surpassed by that of
+Archimedes at the sack of Syracuse.
+
+After that I could no longer control my curiosity--I felt I must speak
+to him again, and I made an opportunity later, as we stood alone on a
+stand which commanded the finish of one of the shorter courses, by
+suggesting that he should share my umbrella.
+
+Before accepting he glanced suspiciously at me through the rills that
+streamed from his unprotected hat-brim. 'I'm afraid,' I said, 'it is
+rather like shutting the stable-door after the steed is stolen.'
+
+He started. 'He _was_ stolen, then,' he cried; 'so you have heard?'
+
+I explained that I had only used an old proverb which I thought might
+appeal to him, and he sighed heavily.
+
+'I was misled for the moment,' he said: 'you have guessed, then, that I
+have been accustomed to horses?'
+
+'You have hardly made any great secret of it.'
+
+'The fact is,' he said, instantly understanding this allusion to his
+costume, 'I--I put on these things so as not to lose the habit of
+riding altogether--I have not been on horseback lately. At one time I
+used to ride constantly--constantly. I was a regular attendant in Rotten
+Row--until something occurred which shook my nerve, and I am only
+waiting now for the shock to subside.'
+
+I did not like to ask any questions, and we walked back to the station,
+and travelled up to Waterloo in company, without any further reference
+to the subject.
+
+As we were parting, however, he said, 'I wonder if you would care to
+hear my full story some day? I cannot help thinking it would interest
+you, and it would be a relief to me.'
+
+I was ready enough to hear whatever he chose to tell me; and persuaded
+him to dine with me at my rooms that evening, and unbosom himself
+afterwards, which he did to an extent for which I confess I was
+unprepared.
+
+That he himself implicitly believed in his own story, I could not doubt;
+and he told it throughout with the oddest mixture of vanity and modesty,
+and an obvious struggle between a dim perception of his own absurdity
+and the determination to spare himself in no single particular, which,
+though it did not overcome my scepticism, could not fail to enlist
+sympathy. But for all that, by the time he entered upon the more
+sensational part of his case, I was driven to form conclusions
+respecting it which, as they will probably force themselves upon the
+reader's own mind, I need not anticipate here.
+
+I give the story, as far as possible, in the words of its author; and
+have only to add that it would never have been published here without
+his full consent and approval.
+
+
+'My name,' said he, 'is Gustavus Pulvertoft. I have no occupation, and
+six hundred a year. I lived a quiet and contented bachelor until I was
+twenty-eight, and then I met Diana Chetwynd for the first time. We were
+spending Christmas at the same country-house, and it did not take me
+long to become the most devoted of her many adorers. She was one of the
+most variously accomplished girls I had ever met. She was a skilled
+musician, a brilliant amateur actress; she could give most men thirty
+out of a hundred at billiards, and her judgment and daring across the
+most difficult country had won her the warm admiration of all
+hunting-men. And she was neither fast nor horsey, seeming to find but
+little pleasure in the society of mere sportsmen, to whose conversation
+she infinitely preferred that of persons who, like myself, were rather
+agreeable than athletic. I was not at that time, whatever I may be now,
+without my share of good looks, and for some reason it pleased Miss
+Chetwynd to show me a degree of favour which she accorded to no other
+member of the house-party.
+
+It was annoying to feel that my unfamiliarity with the open-air sports
+in which she delighted debarred me from her company to so great an
+extent; for it often happened that I scarcely saw her until the evening,
+when I sometimes had the bliss of sitting next to her at dinner; but on
+these occasions I could not help seeing that she found some pleasure in
+my society.
+
+I don't think I have mentioned that, besides being exquisitely lovely,
+Diana was an heiress, and it was not without a sense of my own
+presumption that I allowed myself to entertain the hope of winning her
+at some future day. Still, I was not absolutely penniless, and she was
+her own mistress, and I had some cause, as I have said, for believing
+that she was, at least, not ill-disposed towards me. It seemed a
+favourable sign, for instance, when she asked me one day why it was I
+never rode. I replied that I had not ridden for years--though I did not
+add that the exact number of those years was twenty-eight.
+
+'Oh, but you must take it up again!' she said, with the prettiest air of
+imperiousness. 'You ought to ride in the Row next season.'
+
+'If I did,' I said, 'would you let me ride with you sometimes?'
+
+'We should meet, of course,' she said; 'and it is such a pity not to
+keep up your riding--you lose so much by not doing so.'
+
+Was I wrong in taking this as an intimation that, by following her
+advice, I should not lose my reward? If you had seen her face as she
+spoke, you would have thought as I did then--as I do now.
+
+And so, with this incentive, I overcame any private misgivings, and soon
+after my return to town attended a fashionable riding-school near Hyde
+Park, with the fixed determination to acquire the whole art and mystery
+of horsemanship.
+
+That I found learning a pleasure I cannot conscientiously declare. I
+have passed happier hours than those I spent in cantering round four
+bare whitewashed walls on a snorting horse, with my interdicted stirrups
+crossed upon the saddle. The riding-master informed me from time to time
+that I was getting on, and I knew instinctively when I was coming off;
+but I must have made some progress, for my instructor became more
+encouraging. 'Why, when you come here first, Mr. Pulvertoft, sir, you
+were like a pair o' tongs on a wall, as they say; whereas now--well, you
+can tell yourself how you are,' he would say; though, even then, I
+occasionally had reason to regret that I was _not_ on a wall. However, I
+persevered, inspired by the thought that each fresh horse I crossed (and
+some were very fresh indeed) represented one more barrier surmounted
+between myself and Diana, and encouraged by the discovery, after
+repeated experiments, that tan was rather soothing to fall upon than
+otherwise.
+
+When I walked in the Row, where a few horsemen were performing as
+harbingers of spring, I criticised their riding, which I thought
+indifferent, as they neglected nearly all the rules. I began to
+anticipate a day when I should exhibit a purer and more classic style of
+equestrianism. And one morning I saw Diana, who pulled up her dancing
+mare to ask me if I had remembered her advice, and I felt proudly able
+to reply that I should certainly make my appearance in the Row before
+very long.
+
+From that day I was perpetually questioning my riding-master as to when
+he considered I should be ripe enough for Rotten Row. He was dubious,
+but not actually dissuasive. 'It's like this, you see, sir,' he
+explained, 'if you get hold of a quiet, steady horse--why, you won't
+come to no harm; but if you go out on an animal that will take advantage
+of you, Mr. Pulvertoft, why, you'll be all no-how on him, sir.'
+
+They would have mounted me at the school; but I knew most of the stud
+there, and none of them quite came up to my ideal of a 'quiet, steady
+horse;' so I went to a neighbouring job-master, from whom I had
+occasionally hired a brougham, and asked to be shown an animal he could
+recommend to one who had not had much practice lately. He admitted
+candidly enough that most of his horses 'took a deal of riding,' but
+added that it so happened that he had one just then which would suit me
+'down to the ground'--a phrase which grated unpleasantly on my nerves,
+though I consented to see the horse. His aspect impressed me most
+favourably. He was a chestnut of noble proportions, with a hogged mane;
+but what reassured me was the expression of his eye, indicating as it
+did a self-respect and sagacity which one would hardly expect for seven
+and sixpence an hour.
+
+'You won't get a showier Park 'ack than what he is, not to be so quiet,'
+said his owner. 'He's what you may call a kind 'oss, and as gentle--you
+could ride him on a packthread.'
+
+I considered reins safer, but I was powerfully drawn towards the horse:
+he seemed to me to be sensible that he had a character to lose, and to
+possess too high an intelligence wilfully to forfeit his testimonials.
+With hardly a second thought, I engaged him for the following afternoon.
+
+I mounted at the stables, with just a passing qualm, perhaps, while my
+stirrup-leathers were being adjusted, and a little awkwardness in taking
+up my reins, which were more twisted than I could have wished; however,
+at length, I found myself embarked on the stream of traffic on the back
+of the chestnut--whose name, by the way, was Brutus.
+
+Shall I ever forget the pride and ecstasy of finding that I had my steed
+under perfect control, that we threaded the maze of carriages with
+absolute security? I turned him into the Park, and clucked my tongue: he
+broke into a canter, and how shall I describe my delight at the
+discovery that it was not uncomfortable? I said 'Woa,' and he stopped,
+so gradually that my equilibrium was not seriously disturbed; he
+trotted, and still I accommodated myself to his movements without any
+positive inconvenience. I could have embraced him for gratitude: never
+before had I been upon a beast whose paces were so easy, whose behaviour
+was so considerate. I could ride at last! or, which amounted to the same
+thing, I could ride the horse I was on, and I would 'use no other.' I
+was about to meet Diana Chetwynd, and need not fear even to encounter
+her critical eyes.
+
+We had crossed the Serpentine bridge, and were just turning in upon the
+Ride, when--and here I am only too conscious that what I am about to say
+may strike you as almost incredible--when I heard an unfamiliar voice
+addressing me with, 'I say--you!' and the moment afterwards realised
+that it proceeded from my own horse!
+
+I am not ashamed to own that I was as nearly off as possible; for a more
+practised rider than I could pretend to be might have a difficulty in
+preserving his equanimity in this all but unparalleled situation. I was
+too much engaged in feeling for my left stirrup to make any reply, and
+presently the horse spoke once more. 'I say,' he inquired, and I failed
+to discern the slightest trace of respect in his tone--'do you think you
+can ride?' You can judge for yourself how disconcerting the inquiry must
+have been from such lips: I felt rooted to the saddle--a sensation
+which, with me, was sufficiently rare. I looked round in helpless
+bewilderment, at the shimmering Serpentine, and the white houses in Park
+Lane gleaming out of a lilac haze, at the cocoa-coloured Row, and the
+flash of distant carriage-wheels in the sunlight: all looked as
+usual--and yet, there was I on the back of a horse which had just
+inquired 'whether I thought I could ride'!
+
+'I have had two dozen lessons at a riding-school,' I said at last, with
+rather a flabby dignity.
+
+'I should hardly have suspected it,' was his brutal retort. 'You are
+evidently one of the hopeless cases.'
+
+I was deeply hurt, the more so because I could not deny that he had some
+claim to be a judge. 'I--I thought we were getting on so nicely
+together,' I faltered, and all he said in reply to that was, '_Did_
+you?'
+
+'Do you know,' I began, striving to be conversational, 'I never was on a
+horse that talked before.'
+
+'You are enough to make any horse talk,' he answered; 'but I suppose I
+_am_ an exception.'
+
+'I think you must be,' said I. 'The only horses I ever heard of as
+possessing the gift of speech were the Houyhnhnms.'
+
+'How do you know I am not one of them?' he replied.
+
+'If you are, you will understand that I took the liberty of mounting you
+under a very pardonable mistake; and if you will have the goodness to
+stand still, I will no longer detain you.'
+
+'Not so fast,' said he: 'I want to know something more about you first.
+I should say now you were a man with plenty of oats.'
+
+'I am--well off,' I said. How I wished I was!
+
+'I have long been looking out for a proprietor who would not overwork
+me: now, of course, I don't know, but you scarcely strike me as a _hard_
+rider.'
+
+'I do not think I could be fairly accused of that,' I answered, with all
+the consciousness of innocence.
+
+'Just so--then buy me.'
+
+'No,' I gasped: 'after the extremely candid opinion you were good enough
+to express of my riding, I'm surprised that you should even suggest such
+a thing.'
+
+'Oh, I will put up with that--you will suit me well enough, I dare say.'
+
+'You must excuse me. I prefer to keep my spare cash for worthier
+objects; and, with your permission, I will spend the remainder of the
+afternoon on foot.'
+
+'You will do nothing of the sort,' said he.
+
+'If you won't stop, and let me get off properly,' I said with firmness,
+'I shall _roll_ off.' There were some promenaders within easy hail; but
+how was I to word a call for help, how explain such a dilemma as mine?
+
+'You will only reduce me to the painful necessity of rolling on you,' he
+replied. 'You must see that you are to a certain extent in my power.
+Suppose it occurred to me to leap those rails and take you into the
+Serpentine, or to run away and upset a mounted policeman with you--do
+you think you could offer much opposition?'
+
+I could not honestly assert that I did. 'You were introduced to me,' I
+said reproachfully, 'as a _kind_ horse!'
+
+'And so I am--apart from matters of business. Come, will you buy, or be
+bolted with? I hate indecision!'
+
+'Buy!' I said, with commercial promptness. 'If you will take me back, I
+will arrange about it at once.'
+
+It is needless to say that my one idea was to get safely off his back:
+after which, neither honour nor law could require me to execute a
+contract extorted from me by threats. But, as we were going down the
+mews, he said reflectively, 'I've been thinking--it will be better for
+all parties, if you make your offer to my proprietor _before_ you
+dismount.' I was too vexed to speak: this animal's infernal intelligence
+had foreseen my manoeuvre--he meant to foil it, if he could.
+
+And then we clattered in under the glass-roofed yard of the livery
+stables; and the job-master, who was alone there, cast his eyes up at
+the sickly-faced clock, as if he were comparing its pallor with my own.
+'Why, you _are_ home early, sir,' he said. 'You didn't find the 'orse
+too much for you, did you?' He said this without any suspicion of the
+real truth; and, indeed, I may say, once for all, that this weird
+horse--Houyhnhnm, or whatever else he might be--admitted no one but
+myself into the secret of his marvellous gifts, and in all his
+conversations with me, managed (though how, I cannot pretend to say) to
+avoid being overheard.
+
+'Oh, dear no,' I protested, 'he carried me admirably--admirably!' and I
+made an attempt to slip off.
+
+No such thing: Brutus instantly jogged my memory, and me, by the
+slightest suggestion of a 'buck.'
+
+'He's a grand 'orse, sir, isn't he?' said the job-master complacently.
+
+'M--magnificent!' I agreed, with a jerk. 'Will you go to his head,
+please?'
+
+But the horse backed into the centre of the yard, where he plunged with
+a quiet obstinacy. 'I like him so much,' I called out, as I clung to the
+saddle, 'that I want to know if you're at all inclined to part with
+him?' Here Brutus became calm and attentive.
+
+'Would you be inclined to make me a orfer for him, sir?'
+
+'Yes,' I said faintly. 'About how much would he be?'
+
+'You step into my orfice here, sir,' said he, 'and we'll talk it over.'
+
+I should have been only too willing, for there was no room there for the
+horse, but the suspicious animal would not hear of it: he began to
+revolve immediately.
+
+'Let us settle it now--here,' I said, 'I can't wait.'
+
+The job-master stroked away a grin. No doubt there _was_ something
+unbusinesslike and unpractical in such precipitation, especially as
+combined with my appearance at the time.
+
+'Well, you _'ave_ took a voilent fancy to the 'orse and no mistake,
+sir,' he remarked.
+
+'I never crossed a handsomer creature,' I said; which was hardly a
+prudent remark for an intending purchaser, but then, there was the
+animal himself to be conciliated.
+
+'I don't know, really, as I can do without him just at this time of
+year,' said the man. 'I'm under-'orsed as it is for the work I've got to
+do.'
+
+A sweet relief stole over me: I had done all that could be expected of
+me. 'I'm very sorry to hear that,' I said, preparing to dismount. 'That
+_is_ a disappointment; but if you can't there's an end of it.'
+
+'Don't you be afraid,' said Brutus, '_he'll_ sell me readily enough:
+make him an offer, quick!'
+
+'I'll give you thirty guineas for him, come!' I said, knowing well
+enough that he would not take twice the money.
+
+'I thought a gentleman like you would have had more insight into the
+value of a 'orse,' he said: 'why, his action alone is worth that, sir.'
+
+'You couldn't let me have the action without the horse, I suppose?' I
+said, and I must have intended some joke.
+
+It is unnecessary to prolong a painful scene. Brutus ran me up steadily
+from sum to sum, until his owner said at last: 'Well, we won't 'aggle,
+sir, call it a hundred.'
+
+I had to call it a hundred, and what is more, it _was_ a hundred. I took
+him without a warranty, without even a veterinary opinion. I could have
+been induced to take my purchase away then and there, as if I had been
+buying a canary, so unaccustomed was I to transactions of this kind, and
+I am afraid the job-master considered me little better than a fool.
+
+So I found myself the involuntary possessor of a Houyhnhnm, or something
+even worse, and I walked back to my rooms in Park Street in a state of
+stupor. What was I to do with him? To ride an animal so brutally
+plainspoken would be a continual penance; and yet, I should have to keep
+him, for I knew he was cunning enough to outwit any attempt to dispose
+of him. And to this, Love and Ambition had led me! I could not, after
+all I had said, approach Diana with any confidence as a mere pedestrian:
+the fact that I was in possession of a healthy horse which I never rode,
+would be sure to leak out in time, and how was I to account for it? I
+could see no way, and I groaned under an embarrassment which I dared not
+confide to the friendliest ear. I hated the monster that had saddled
+himself upon me, and looked in vain for any mode of escape.
+
+I had to provide Brutus with stabling in another part of the town, for
+he proved exceedingly difficult to please: he found fault with
+everything, and I only wonder he did not demand that his stable should
+be fitted up with blue china and mezzotints. In his new quarters I left
+him for some days to his own devices: a course which I was glad to find,
+on visiting him again, had considerably reduced his arrogance. He wanted
+to go in the Row and see the other horses, and it did not at all meet
+his views to be exercised there by a stableman at unfashionable hours.
+So he proposed a compromise. If I would only consent to mount him, he
+engaged to treat me with forbearance, and pointed out that he could give
+me, as he expressed it, various 'tips' which would improve my seat. I
+was not blind to the advantages of such an arrangement. It is not every
+one who secures a riding-master in the person of his own horse; the
+horse is essentially a generous animal, and I felt that I might trust to
+Brutus's honour. And to do him justice, he observed the compact with
+strict good faith. Some of his 'tips,' it is true, very nearly tipped me
+off, but their result was to bring us closer together; our relations
+were less strained; it seemed to me that I gained more mastery over him
+every day, and was less stiff afterwards.
+
+But I was not allowed to enjoy this illusion long. One day when I
+innocently asked him if he found my hands improving, he turned upon me
+his off sardonic eye. 'You'll _never_ improve, old sack-of-beans' (for
+he had come to address me with a freedom I burned to resent); 'hands!
+why, you're sawing my mouth off all the time. And your feet "home," and
+tickling me under my shoulders at every stride--why, I'm half ashamed to
+be seen about with you.'
+
+I was deeply hurt. 'I will spare you for the future,' I said coldly;
+'this is my last appearance.'
+
+'Nonsense,' he said, 'you needn't show temper over it. Surely, if I can
+put up with it, _you_ can! But we will make a new compact.' (I never
+knew such a beast as he was for bargains!) 'You only worry me by
+interfering with the reins. Let 'em out, and leave everything to me.
+Just mention from time to time where you want to go, and I'll attend to
+it,--if I've nothing better to do.'
+
+I felt that such an understanding was destructive of all dignity,
+subverting, as it did, the natural relations between horse and rider;
+but I had hardly any self-respect left, and I consented, since I saw no
+way of refusing. And on the whole, I cannot say, even now, that I had
+any grave reason for finding fault with the use Brutus made of my
+concessions; he showed more tact than I could have expected in
+disguising the merely nominal nature of my authority.
+
+I had only one serious complaint against him, which was that he had a
+habit of breaking suddenly away, with a merely formal apology, to
+exchange equine civilities with some cob or mare, to whose owner I was a
+perfect stranger, thus driving me to invent the most desperate excuses
+to cover my seeming intrusion: but I managed to account for it in
+various ways, and even made a few acquaintances in this irregular and
+involuntary manner. I could have wished he had been a less susceptible
+animal, for, though his flirtations were merely Platonic, it is rather
+humiliating to have to play 'gooseberry' to one's own horse--a part
+which I was constantly being called upon to perform!
+
+As it happened, Diana was away in Paris that Easter, and we had not met
+since my appearance in the Row; but I knew she would be in town again
+shortly, and with consummate diplomacy I began to excite Brutus's
+curiosity by sundry careless, half-slighting allusions to Miss
+Chetwynd's little mare, Wild Rose. 'She's too frisky for my taste,' I
+said, 'but she's been a good deal admired, though I dare say you
+wouldn't be particularly struck by her.'
+
+So that, on the first afternoon of Diana's return to the Row, I found it
+easy, under cover of giving Brutus an opportunity of forming an opinion,
+to prevail on him to carry me to her side. Diana, who was with a certain
+Lady Verney, her chaperon, welcomed me with a charming smile.
+
+'I had no idea you could ride so well,' she said, 'you manage that
+beautiful horse of yours so very easily--with such light hands, too.'
+
+This was not irony, for I could now give my whole mind to my seat; and,
+as I never interfered at all with the steering apparatus, my hands must
+have seemed the perfection of lightness.
+
+'He wants delicate handling,' I answered carelessly, 'but he goes very
+well with _me_.'
+
+'I wish you would let me try his paces some morning, Pulvertoft,' struck
+in a Colonel Cockshott, who was riding with them, and whom I knew
+slightly: 'I've a notion he would go better on the curb.'
+
+'I shall be very happy,' I began, when, just in time, I noticed a
+warning depression in Brutus's ears. The Colonel rode about sixteen
+stone, and with spurs! 'I mean,' I added hastily, 'I should have
+been--only, to tell you the truth, I couldn't conscientiously trust any
+one on him but myself.'
+
+'My dear fellow!' said the Colonel, who I could see was offended, 'I've
+not met many horses in my time that I couldn't get upon terms with.'
+
+'I think Mr. Pulvertoft is _quite_ right,' said Diana. 'When a horse
+gets accustomed to one he does so resent a strange hand: it spoils his
+temper for days. I never will lend Wild Rose to anybody for that very
+reason!'
+
+The Colonel fell back in the rear in a decided sulk. 'Poor dear Colonel
+Cockshott!' said Diana, 'he is so proud of his riding, but _I_ think he
+dragoons a horse. I don't call that _riding_, do you?'
+
+'Well--hardly,' I agreed, with easy disparagement. 'I never believe in
+ruling a horse by fear.'
+
+'I suppose you are very fond of yours?' she said.
+
+'Fond is not the word!' I exclaimed--and it certainly was not.
+
+'I am not sure that what I said about lending Wild Rose would apply to
+_you_,' she said. 'I think you would be gentle with her.'
+
+I was certain that I should treat her with all consideration; but as I
+doubted whether she would wholly reciprocate it, I said with much
+presence of mind, that I should regard riding her as akin to
+profanation.
+
+As Brutus and I were going home, he observed that it was a good thing I
+had not agreed to lend him to the Colonel.
+
+'Yes,' I said, determined to improve the occasion, 'you might not have
+found him as considerate as--well, as some people!'
+
+'I meant it was a good thing for _you_!' he hinted darkly, and I did not
+care to ask for an explanation. 'What did you mean,' he resumed, 'by
+saying that I should not admire Wild Rose? Why, she is
+charming--charming!'
+
+'In that case,' I said, 'I don't mind riding with her mistress
+occasionally--to oblige you.'
+
+'You don't mind!' he said; 'you will _have_ to, my boy,--and every
+afternoon!'
+
+I suppressed a chuckle: after all, man _is_ the nobler animal. I could
+manage a horse--in my own way. My little _ruse_ had succeeded: I should
+have no more forced introductions to mystified strangers.
+
+And now for some weeks my life passed in a happy dream. I only lived for
+those hours in the Row, where Brutus turned as naturally to Wild Rose as
+the sunflower to the sun, and Diana and I grew more intimate every day.
+Happiness and security made me almost witty. I was merciless in my
+raillery of the eccentric exhibitions of horsemanship which were to be
+met with, and Diana was provoked by my comments to the sweetest silvery
+laughter. As for Colonel Cockshott, whom I had once suspected of a
+desire to be my rival, he had long become a 'negligible quantity;' and
+if I delayed in asking Diana to trust me with her sweet self, it was
+only because I found an epicurean pleasure in prolonging a suspense that
+was so little uncertain.
+
+And then, without warning, my riding was interrupted for a while. Brutus
+was discovered, much to his annoyance, to have a saddle-raw, and was
+even so unjust as to lay the blame on me, though, for my own part, I
+thought it a mark of apt, though tardy, retribution. I was not disposed
+to tempt Fortune upon any other mount, but I could not keep away from
+the Row, nevertheless, and appeared there on foot. I saw Diana riding
+with the Colonel, who seemed to think his opportunity had come at last;
+but whenever she passed the railings on which I leaned, she would raise
+her eyebrows and draw her mouth down into a little curve of resigned
+boredom, which completely reassured me. Still, I was very glad when
+Brutus was well again, and we were cantering down the Row once more,
+both in the highest spirits.
+
+'I never heard the horses here _whinny_ so much as they do this season,'
+I said, by way of making conversation. 'Can you account for it at all?'
+For he sometimes gave me pieces of information which enabled me to
+impress Diana afterwards by my intimate knowledge of horses.
+
+'Whinnying?' he said. 'They're _laughing_, that's what they're
+doing--and no wonder!'
+
+'Oh!' said I, 'and what's the joke?'
+
+'Why, _you_ are!' he replied. 'You don't suppose you take _them_ in, do
+you? They know all about you, bless your heart!'
+
+'Oh, do they?' I said blankly. This brute took a positive pleasure, I
+believe, in reducing my self-esteem.
+
+'I dare say it has got about through Wild Rose,' he continued. 'She was
+immensely tickled when I told her. I'm afraid she must have been feeling
+rather dull all these days, by the bye.'
+
+I felt an unworthy impulse to take his conceit down as he had lowered
+mine.
+
+'Not so very, I think,' I said. 'She seemed to me to find that brown
+hunter of Colonel Cockshott's a very agreeable substitute.'
+
+Late as it is for reparation, I must acknowledge with shame that in
+uttering this insinuation, I did that poor little mare (for whom I
+entertained the highest respect) a shameful injustice; and I should like
+to state here, in the most solemn and emphatic manner, my sincere belief
+that, from first to last, she conducted herself in a manner that should
+have shielded her from all calumny.
+
+It was only a mean desire to retaliate, a petty and ignoble spite, that
+prompted me thus to poison Brutus's confidence, and I regretted the
+words as soon as I had uttered them.
+
+'That beast!' he said, starting as if I had touched him with a whip--a
+thing I never used--'why, he hasn't two ideas in his great fiddle-head.
+The only sort of officer _he_ ought to carry is a Salvationist!'
+
+'I grant he has not your personal advantages and charm of manner,' I
+said. 'No doubt I was wrong to say anything about it.'
+
+'No,' he said, 'you--you have done me a service,' and he relapsed into a
+sombre silence.
+
+I was riding with Diana as usual, and was about to express my delight at
+being able to resume our companionship, when her mare drew slightly
+ahead and lashed out suddenly, catching me on the left leg, and causing
+intense agony for the moment.
+
+Diana showed the sweetest concern, imploring me to go home in a cab at
+once, while her groom took charge of Brutus. I declined the cab; but, as
+my leg was really painful, and Brutus was showing an impatience I dared
+not disregard, I had to leave her side.
+
+On our way home, Brutus said moodily, 'It is all over between us--you
+saw that?'
+
+'I felt it!' I replied. 'She nearly broke my leg.'
+
+'It was intended for me,' he said. 'It was her way of signifying that we
+had better be strangers for the future. I taxed her with her
+faithlessness; she denied it, of course--every mare does; we had an
+explanation, and everything is at an end!'
+
+I did not ride him again for some days, and when I did, I found him
+steeped in Byronic gloom. He even wanted at first to keep entirely on
+the Bayswater side of the Park, though I succeeded in arguing him out of
+such weakness. 'Be a horse!' I said. 'Show her you don't care. You only
+flatter her by betraying your feelings.'
+
+This was a subtlety that had evidently not occurred to him, but he was
+intelligent enough to feel the force of what I said. 'You are right,' he
+admitted; 'you are not quite a fool in some respects. She shall see how
+little I care!'
+
+Naturally, after this, I expected to accompany Diana as usual, and it
+was a bitter disappointment to me to find that Brutus would not hear of
+doing so. He had an old acquaintance in the Park, a dapple-grey, who,
+probably from some early disappointment was a confirmed cynic, and whose
+society he thought would be congenial just then. The grey was ridden
+regularly by a certain Miss Gittens, whose appearance as she titupped
+laboriously up and down had often furnished Diana and myself with
+amusement.
+
+And now, in spite of all my efforts, Brutus made straight to the grey. I
+was not in such difficulties as might have been expected, for I happened
+to know Miss Gittens slightly, as a lady no longer in the bloom of
+youth, who still retained a wiry form of girlishness. Though rather
+disliking her than not, I found it necessary just then to throw some
+slight effusion into my greeting. She, not unnaturally perhaps, was
+flattered by my preference, and begged me to give her a little
+instruction in riding, which--Heaven forgive me for it!--I took upon
+myself to do.
+
+Even now I scarcely see how I could have acted otherwise: I could not
+leave her side until Brutus had exhausted the pleasures of cynicism with
+his grey friend, and the time had to be filled up somehow. But, oh, the
+torture of seeing Diana at a distance, and knowing that only a miserable
+misunderstanding between our respective steeds kept us apart, feeling
+constrained even to avoid looking in her direction, lest she should
+summon me to her side!
+
+One day, as I was riding with Miss Gittens, she glanced coyly at me
+over her sharp right shoulder, and said, 'Do you know, only such a
+little while ago, I never even dreamed that we should ever become as
+intimate as we are now; it seems almost incredible, does it not?'
+
+'You must not say so,' I replied. 'Surely there is nothing singular in
+my helping you a little with your riding?' Though it struck me that it
+would have been very singular if I had.
+
+'Perhaps not singular,' she murmured, looking modestly down her nose;
+'but will you think me very unmaidenly if I confess that, to me, those
+lessons have developed a dawning danger?'
+
+'You are perfectly safe on the grey,' I said.
+
+'I--I was not thinking of the grey,' she returned. 'Dear Mr. Pulvertoft,
+I must speak frankly--a girl has so many things to consider, and I am
+afraid you have made me forget how wrongly and thoughtlessly I have been
+behaving of late. I cannot help suspecting that you must have some
+motive in seeking my society in so--so marked a manner.'
+
+'Miss Gittens,' said I, 'I can disguise nothing: I have.'
+
+'And you have not been merely amusing yourself all this time?'
+
+'Before Heaven,' I cried with fervour, 'I have _not_!'
+
+'You are not one of those false men who give their bridle-reins a
+shake, and ride off with "Adieu for evermore!"--tell me you are not?'
+
+I might shake _my_ bridle-reins till I was tired and nothing would come
+of it unless Brutus was in the humour to depart; so that I was able to
+assure her with truth that I was not at all that kind of person.
+
+'Then why not let your heart speak?'
+
+'There is such a thing,' I said gloomily, 'as a heart that is gagged.'
+
+'Can no word, no hint of mine loosen the gag?' she wished to know.
+'What, you are silent still? Then, Mr. Pulvertoft, though I may seem
+harsh and cruel in saying it, our pleasant intercourse must end--we must
+ride together no more!'
+
+No more? What would Brutus say to that? I was horrified. 'Miss Gittens,'
+I said in great agitation, 'I entreat you to unsay those words. I--I am
+afraid I could not undertake to accept such a dismissal. Surely, after
+that, you will not insist!'
+
+She sighed. 'I am a weak, foolish girl,' she said; 'you are only too
+able to overcome my judgment. There, Mr. Pulvertoft, look happy again--I
+relent. You may stay if you will!'
+
+You must believe that I felt thoroughly ashamed of myself, for I could
+not be blind to the encouragement which, though I sought to confine my
+words to strict truth, I was innocently affording. But, with a horse
+like mine, what was a man to do? What would you have done yourself? As
+soon as was prudent, I hinted to Brutus that his confidences had lasted
+long enough; and as he trotted away with me, he remarked, 'I thought you
+were never going.' Was he weary of the grey already? My heart leaped.
+'Brutus,' I said thickly, 'are you strong enough to bear a great joy?'
+
+'Speak out,' he said, 'and do try to keep those heels out of my ribs.'
+
+'I cannot see you suffer,' I told him, with a sense of my own hypocrisy
+all the time. 'I must tell you--circumstances have come to my knowledge
+which lead me to believe that we have both judged Wild Rose too hastily.
+I am sure that her heart is yours still. She is only longing to tell you
+that she has never really swerved from her allegiance.'
+
+'It is too late now,' he said, and the back of his head looked
+inflexibly obstinate; 'we have kept asunder too long.'
+
+'No,' I said, 'listen. I take more interest in you than you are,
+perhaps, aware of, and I have thought of a little plan for bringing you
+together again. What if I find an opportunity to see the lady she
+belongs to--we have not met lately, as you know, and I do not pretend
+that I desire a renewal of our intimacy----'
+
+'You like the one on the grey best; I saw that long ago,' he said; and I
+left him in his error.
+
+'In any case, for your sake, I will sacrifice myself,' I said
+magnanimously. 'I will begin to-morrow. Come, you will not let your
+lives be wrecked by a foolish lovers' quarrel?'
+
+He made a little half-hearted opposition, but finally, as I knew he
+would, consented. I had gained my point: I was free from Miss Gittens at
+last!
+
+That evening I met Diana in the hall of a house in Eaton Square. She was
+going downstairs as I was making my way to the ball-room, and greeted me
+with a rather cool little nod.
+
+'You have quite deserted me lately,' she said, smiling, but I could read
+the reproach in her eyes, 'you never ride with us now.'
+
+My throat was swelling with passionate eloquence--and I could not get
+any of it out.
+
+'No, I never do,' was all my stupid tongue could find to say.
+
+'You have discovered a more congenial companion,' said cruel Diana.
+
+'Miss Chetwynd,' I said eagerly, 'you don't know how I have been
+wishing--! Will you let me ride with you to-morrow, as--as you used to
+do?'
+
+'You are quite sure you won't be afraid of my naughty Wild Rose?' she
+said. 'I have given her such a scolding, that I think she is thoroughly
+ashamed of herself.'
+
+'You thought it was _that_ that kept me!' I cried. 'Oh, if I could tell
+you!'
+
+She smiled: she was my dear, friendly Diana again.
+
+'You shall tell me all about it to-morrow,' she said. 'You will not
+have another opportunity, because we are going to Aix on Friday. And
+now, good-night. I am stopping the way, and the linkman is getting quite
+excited over it.'
+
+She passed on, and the carriage rolled away with her, and I was too
+happy to mind very much--had she not forgiven me? Should we not meet
+to-morrow? I should have two whole hours to declare myself in, and this
+time I would dally with Fortune no longer.
+
+How excited I was the following day: how fearful, when the morning broke
+grey and lowering: how grateful, when the benignant sun shone out later,
+and promised a brilliant afternoon: how carefully I dressed, and what a
+price I paid for the flower for my buttonhole!
+
+So we cantered on to the Row, as goodly a couple (if I may be pardoned
+this retrospective vanity) as any there; and by and by, I saw, with the
+quick eye of a lover, Diana's willowy form in the distance. She was not
+alone, but I knew that the Colonel would soon have to yield his place to
+me.
+
+As soon as she saw me, she urged her mare to a trot, and came towards me
+with the loveliest faint blush and dawning smile of welcome, when, all
+at once, Brutus came to a dead stop, which nearly threw me on his neck,
+and stood quivering in every limb.
+
+'Do you see that?' he said hoarsely. 'And I was about to forgive her!'
+
+I saw: my insinuation, baseless enough at the beginning, was now but too
+well justified. Colonel Cockshott was on his raw-boned brown hunter, and
+even my brief acquaintance with horses enabled me to see that Wild Rose
+no longer regarded him with her former indifference.
+
+Diana and the Colonel had reined up and seemed waiting for me--would
+Brutus never move? 'Show your pride,' I said in an agonised whisper,
+'Treat her with the contempt she deserves!'
+
+'I will,' he said between his bit and clenched teeth.
+
+And then Miss Gittens came bumping by on the grey, and, before I could
+interfere, my Houyhnhnm was off like a shot in pursuit. I saw Diana's
+sweet, surprised face: I heard the Colonel's jarring laugh as I passed,
+and I--I could only bow in mortified appeal, and long for a gulf to leap
+into like Curtius!
+
+I don't know what I said to Miss Gittens. I believe I made myself
+recklessly amiable, and I remember she lingered over parting in a
+horribly emotional manner. I was too miserable to mind: all the time I
+was seeing Diana's astonished eyes, hearing Colonel Cockshott's
+heartless laugh. Brutus made a kind of explanation on our way home: 'You
+meant well,' he said, 'but you see you were wrong. Your proposed
+sacrifice, for which I am just as grateful to you as if it had been
+effected, was useless. All I could do in return was to take you where
+your true inclination lay. I, too, can be unselfish.'
+
+I was too dejected to curse his unselfishness. I did not even trouble
+myself to explain what it had probably cost me. I only felt drearily
+that I had had my last ride, I had had enough of horsemanship for ever!
+
+That evening I went to the theatre, I wanted to deaden thought for the
+moment; and during one of the intervals I saw Lady Verney in the stalls,
+and went up to speak to her. 'Your niece is not with you?' I said; 'I
+thought I should have had a chance of--of saying good-bye to her before
+she left for the continent.'
+
+I had a lingering hope that she might ask me to lunch, that I might have
+one more opportunity of explaining.
+
+'Oh,' said Lady Verney, 'but that is all changed; we are not going--at
+least, not yet.'
+
+'Not going!' I cried, incredulous for very joy.
+
+'No, it is all very sudden; but,--well, you are almost like an old
+friend, and you are sure to hear it sooner or later. I only knew myself
+this afternoon, when she came in from her ride. Colonel Cockshott has
+proposed and she has accepted him. We're _so_ pleased about it. Wasn't
+dear Mrs. ---- delightful in that last act? I positively saw real tears
+on her face!'
+
+If I had waited much longer she would have seen a similar display of
+realism on mine. But I went back and sat the interval out, and listened
+critically to the classical selection of chamber-music from the
+orchestra, and saw the rest of the play, though I have no notion how it
+ended.
+
+All that night my heart was slowly consumed by a dull rage that grew
+with every sleepless hour; but the object of my resentment was not
+Diana. She had only done what as a woman she was amply justified in
+doing after the pointed slight I had apparently inflicted upon her. Her
+punishment was sufficient already, for, of course, I guessed that she
+had only accepted the Colonel under the first intolerable sting of
+desertion. No: I reserved all my wrath for Brutus, who had betrayed me
+at the moment of triumph. I planned revenge. Cost what it might I would
+ride him once more. In the eyes of the law I was his master. I would
+exercise my legal rights to the full.
+
+The afternoon came at last. I was in a white heat of anger, though as I
+ascended to the saddle there were bystanders who put a more uncharitable
+construction upon my complexion.
+
+Brutus cast an uneasy eye at my heels as we started: 'What are those
+things you've got on?' he inquired.
+
+'Spurs,' I replied curtly.
+
+'You shouldn't wear them till you have learnt to turn your toes in,' he
+said. 'And a whip, too! May I ask what that is for?'
+
+'We will discuss that presently,' I said very coldly; for I did not want
+to have a scene with my horse in the street.
+
+When we came round by the statue of Achilles and on to the Ride, I
+shortened my reins, and got a better hold of the whip, while I found
+that, from some cause I cannot explain, the roof of my mouth grew
+uncomfortably dry.
+
+'I should be glad of a little quiet talk with you, if you've no
+objection,' I began.
+
+'I am quite at your disposal,' he said, champing his bit with a touch of
+irony.
+
+'First, let me tell you,' I said, 'that I have lost my only love for
+ever.'
+
+'Well,' he retorted flippantly, 'you won't die of it. So have I. We must
+endeavour to console one another!'
+
+I still maintained a deadly calm. 'You seem unaware that you are the
+sole cause of my calamity,' I said. 'Had you only consented to face Wild
+Rose yesterday, I should have been a happy man by this time!'
+
+'How was I to know that, when you let me think all your affections were
+given to the elderly thing who is trotted out by my friend the grey?'
+
+'We won't argue, please,' I said hastily. 'It is enough that your
+infernal egotism and self-will have ruined my happiness. I have allowed
+you to usurp the rule, to reverse our natural positions. I shall do so
+no more. I intend to teach you a lesson you will never forget.'
+
+For a horse, he certainly had a keen sense of humour. I thought the
+girths would have snapped.
+
+'And when do you intend to begin?' he asked, as soon as he could speak.
+
+I looked in front of me: there were Diana and her accepted lover riding
+towards us; and so natural is dissimulation, even to the sweetest and
+best women, that no one would have suspected from her radiant face that
+her gaiety covered an aching heart.
+
+'I intend to begin _now_,' I said. 'Monster, demon, whatever you are
+that have held me in thrall so long, I have broken my chains! I have
+been a coward long enough. You may kill me if you like. I rather hope
+you will; but first I mean to pay you back some of the humiliation with
+which you have loaded me. I intend to thrash you as long as I remain in
+the saddle.'
+
+I have been told by eye-witnesses that the chastisement was of brief
+duration, but while it lasted, I flatter myself, it was severe. I laid
+into him with a stout whip, of whose effectiveness I had assured myself
+by experiments upon my own legs. I dug my borrowed spurs into his
+flanks. I jerked his mouth. I dare say he was almost as much surprised
+as pained. But he _was_ pained!
+
+I was about to continue my practical rebuke, when my victim suddenly
+evaded my grasp; and for one vivid second I seemed to be gazing upon a
+birdseye view of his back; and then there was a crash, and I lay,
+buzzing like a bee, in an iridescent fog, and each colour meant a
+different pain, and they faded at last into darkness, and I remember no
+more.
+
+'It was weeks,' concluded Mr. Pulvertoft, 'before that darkness lifted
+and revealed me to myself as a strapped and bandaged invalid. But--and
+this is perhaps the most curious part of my narrative--almost the first
+sounds that reached my ears were those of wedding bells; and I knew,
+without requiring to be told, that they were ringing for Diana's
+marriage with the Colonel. _That_ showed there wasn't much the matter
+with me, didn't it? Why, I can hear them everywhere now. I don't think
+she ought to have had them rung at Sandown though: it was just a little
+ostentatious, so long after the ceremony; don't you think so?'
+
+'Yes--yes,' I said; 'but you never told me what became of the horse.'
+
+'Ah! the horse--yes. I am looking for him. I'm not so angry with him as
+I was, and I don't like to ask too many questions at the stables, for
+fear they may tell me one day that they had to shoot him while I was so
+ill. You knew I was ill, I dare say?' he broke off: 'there were
+bulletins about me in the papers. Look here.'
+
+He handed me a cutting on which I read:
+
+'THE RECENT ACCIDENT IN ROTTEN ROW.--There is no change as yet in Mr.
+Pulvertoft's condition. The unfortunate gentleman is still lying
+unconscious at his rooms in Park Street; and his medical attendants fear
+that, even if he recovers his physical strength, the brain will be
+permanently injured.'
+
+'But that was all nonsense!' said Mr. Pulvertoft, with a little nervous
+laugh, 'it wasn't injured a bit, or how could I remember everything so
+clearly as I do, you know?'
+
+And this was an argument that was, of course, unanswerable.
+
+
+
+
+_THE GOOD LITTLE GIRL_
+
+A STORY FOR CHILDREN
+
+
+Her name was Priscilla Prodgers, and she was a very good little girl
+indeed. So good was she, in fact, that she could not help being aware of
+it herself, and that is a stage to which very many quite excellent
+persons never succeed in attaining. She was only just a child, it is
+true, but she had read a great many beautiful story-books, and so she
+knew what a powerful reforming influence a childish and innocent remark,
+or a youthful example, or a happy combination of both, can exert over
+grown-up people. And early in life--she was but eleven at the date of
+this history--early in life she had seen clearly that her mission was to
+reform her family and relatives generally. This was a heavy task for one
+so young, particularly in Priscilla's case, for, besides a father,
+mother, brother, and sister, in whom she could not but discern many and
+serious failings, she possessed an aunt who was addicted to insincerity,
+two female cousins whose selfishness and unamiability were painful to
+witness, and a male cousin who talked slang and was so worldly that he
+habitually went about in yellow boots! Nevertheless Priscilla did not
+flinch, although, for some reason, her earnest and unremitting efforts
+had hitherto failed to produce any deep impression. At times she thought
+this was owing to the fact that she tried to reform all her family
+together, and that her best plan would be to take each one separately,
+and devote her whole energies to improving that person alone. But then
+she never could make up her mind which member of the family to begin
+with. It is small wonder that she often felt a little disheartened, but
+even that was a cheering symptom, for in the books it is generally just
+when the little heroine becomes most discouraged that the seemingly
+impenitent relative exhibits the first sign of softening.
+
+So Priscilla persevered: sometimes with merely a shocked glance of
+disapproval, which she had practised before the looking-glass until she
+could do it perfectly; sometimes with some tender, tactful little hint.
+'Don't you think, dear papa,' she would say softly, on a Sunday morning,
+'don't you _think_ you could write your newspaper article on some
+_other_ day--is it a work of _real_ necessity?' Or she would ask her
+mother, who was certainly fond of wearing pretty things. 'How much bread
+for poor starving people would the price of your new bonnet buy, mother?
+I should so like to work it out on my little slate!'
+
+Then she would remind her brother Alick that it would be so much better
+if, instead of wasting his time in playing with silly little tin
+soldiers, he would try to learn as much as he could before he was sent
+to school; while she was never tired of quoting to her sister Betty the
+line, 'Be good, sweet maid, and let who will be clever!' which Betty,
+quite unjustly, interpreted to mean that Priscilla thought but poorly of
+her sister's intellectual capacity. Once when, as a great treat, the
+children were allowed to read 'Ivanhoe' aloud, Priscilla declined to
+participate until she had conscientiously read up the whole Norman
+period in her English history; and on another occasion she cried
+bitterly on hearing that her mother had arranged for them to learn
+dancing, and even endured bread and water for an entire day rather than
+consent to acquire an accomplishment which she feared, from what she had
+read, would prove a snare. On the second day--well, there was roast beef
+and Yorkshire pudding for dinner, and Priscilla yielded; but she made
+the resolution--and kept it too--that, if she went to the dancing class,
+she would firmly refuse to take the slightest pains to learn a single
+step.
+
+I only mention all these traits to show that Priscilla really was an
+unusually good child, which makes it the more sad and strange that her
+family should have profited so little by her example. She was neither
+loved nor respected as she ought to have been, I am grieved to say. Her
+papa, when he was not angry, made the cruellest fun of her mild
+reproofs; her mother continued to spend money on dresses and bonnets,
+and even allowed the maid to say that her mistress was 'not at home,'
+when she was merely unwilling to receive visitors. Alick and Betty, too,
+only grew more exasperated when Priscilla urged them to keep their
+tempers, and altogether she could not help feeling how wasted and thrown
+away she was in such a circle.
+
+But she never quite lost heart; her papa was a literary man and wrote
+tales, some of which she feared were not as true as they affected to be,
+while he invariably neglected to insert a moral in any of them;
+frequently she dropped little remarks before him with apparent
+carelessness, in the hope that he might put them in print--but he never
+did; she never could recognise herself as a character in any of his
+stories, and so at last she gave up reading them at all!
+
+But one morning she came more near to giving up in utter despair than
+ever before. Only the previous day she had been so hopeful! her father
+had really seemed to be beginning to appreciate his little daughter, and
+had presented her with sixpence in the new coinage to put in her
+money-box. This had emboldened her to such a degree that, happening on
+the following morning to hear him ejaculate 'Confound it!' she had,
+pressing one hand to her beating heart and laying the other hand softly
+upon his shoulder (which is the proper attitude on these occasions),
+reminded him that such an expression was scarcely less reprehensible
+than actual bad language. Upon which her hard-hearted papa had told her,
+almost sharply, '_not to be a little prig!_'
+
+Priscilla forgave him, of course, and freely, because he was her father
+and it was her duty to bear with him; but she felt the injustice deeply,
+for all that. Then, when she went up into the nursery, Alick and Betty
+made a frantic uproar, merely because she insisted on teaching them the
+moves in chess, when they perversely wanted to play Halma! So, feeling
+baffled and sick at heart, she had put on her hat and run out all alone
+to a quiet lane near her home, where she could soothe her troubled mind
+by thinking over the ingratitude and lack of appreciation with which her
+efforts were met.
+
+She had not gone very far up the lane when she saw, seated on a bench, a
+bent old woman in a poke-bonnet with a crutch-handled stick in her
+hands, and this old woman Priscilla (who was very quick of observation)
+instantly guessed to be a fairy--in which, as it fell out, she was
+perfectly right.
+
+'Good day, my pretty child!' croaked the old dame.
+
+'Good-day to you, ma'am!' answered Priscilla politely (for she knew that
+it was not only right but prudent to be civil to fairies, particularly
+when they take the form of old women). 'But, if you please, you mustn't
+call me pretty--because I am not. At least,' she added, for she prided
+herself upon her truthfulness, 'not _exactly_ pretty. And I should hate
+to be always thinking about my looks, like poor Milly--she's our
+housemaid, you know--and I so often have to tell her that she did not
+make her _own_ face.'
+
+'I don't alarm you, I see,' said the old crone; 'but possibly you're not
+aware that you're talking to a fairy?'
+
+'Oh, yes, I am--but I'm not a bit afraid, because, you see, fairies can
+only hurt _bad_ children.'
+
+'Ah, and you're a good little child--that's not difficult to see!'
+
+'They don't see it at home!' said Priscilla, with a sad little sigh, 'or
+they would listen more when I tell them of things they oughtn't to do.'
+
+'And what things do they do that they oughtn't to, my child--if you
+don't mind telling me?'
+
+'Oh, I don't mind in the _least_!' Priscilla hastened to assure her; and
+then she told the old woman all her family's faults, and the trial it
+was to bear with them and go on trying to induce them to mend their
+ways. 'And papa is getting worse than ever,' she concluded dolefully;
+'only fancy, this very morning he called me a little prig!'
+
+'Tut, tut!' said the fairy sympathetically, 'deary, deary me! So he
+called you _that_, did he?--"a little prig"! And _you_, too! Ah, the
+world's coming to a pretty pass! I suppose, now, your papa and the rest
+of them have got it into their heads that you are too young and too
+inexperienced to set up as their adviser--is that it?'
+
+'I'm afraid so,' admitted Priscilla; 'but we mustn't blame them,' she
+added gently, 'we must remember that they don't know any better--mustn't
+we, ma'am?'
+
+'You sweet child!' said the old lady with enthusiasm; 'I must see if I
+can't do something to help you, though I'm not the fairy I used to
+be--still, there are tricks I can manage still, if I'm put to it. What
+you want is something that will prove to them that they ought to pay
+more attention to you, eh?--something there can be no possible mistake
+about?'
+
+'Yes!' cried Priscilla eagerly, 'and--and--how would it be if you
+changed them into something else, just to _show_ them, and then I could
+ask for them to be transformed back again, you know?'
+
+'What an ingenious little thing you are!' exclaimed the fairy; 'but, let
+us see--if you came home and found your cruel papa doing duty as the
+family hatstand, or strutting about as a Cochin China fowl----'
+
+'Oh, _yes_; and I'd feed him every day, till he was sorry!' interrupted
+the warmhearted little girl impulsively.
+
+'Ah, but you're so hasty, my dear. Who would write all the clever
+articles and tales to earn bread and meat for you all?--fowls can't use
+a pen. No, we must find a prettier trick than that--there _was_ one I
+seem to remember, long, long ago, performing for a good little ill-used
+girl, just like you, my dearie, just like you! Now what was it? some
+gift I gave her whenever she opened her lips----'
+
+'Why, _I_ remember--how funny that you should have forgotten! Whenever
+she opened her lips, roses, and diamonds, and rubies fell out. That
+would be the very thing! Then they'd _have_ to attend to me! Oh, do be a
+kind old fairy and give me a gift like that--do, _do_!'
+
+'Now, don't be so impetuous! You forget that this is not the time of
+year for roses, and, as for jewels, well, I don't think I can be very
+far wrong in supposing that you open your lips pretty frequently in the
+course of the day?'
+
+'Alick does call me a "mag,"' said Priscilla; 'but that's wrong, because
+I never speak without having something to say. I don't think people
+ought to--it may do so _much_ harm; mayn't it?'
+
+'Undoubtedly. But, anyhow, if we made it _every_ time you opened your
+lips, you would soon ruin me in precious stones, that's plain! No, I
+think we had better say that the jewels shall only drop when you are
+saying something you wish to be particularly improving--how will that
+do?'
+
+'Very nicely indeed, ma'am, thank you,' said Priscilla, 'because, you
+see, it comes to just the same thing.'
+
+'Ah, well, try to be as economical of your good things as you
+can--remember that in these hard times a poor old fairy's riches are
+not as inexhaustible as they used to be.'
+
+'And jewels really will drop out?'
+
+'Whenever they are wanted to "point a moral and adorn a tale,"' said the
+old woman (who, for a fairy, was particularly well-read). 'There, run
+along home, do, and scatter your pearls before your relations.'
+
+It need scarcely be said that Priscilla was only too willing to obey;
+she ran all the way home with a light heart, eager to exhibit her
+wonderful gift. 'How surprised they will be!' she was thinking. 'If it
+had been Betty, instead of me, I suppose she would have come back
+talking toads! It would have been a good lesson for her--but still,
+toads are nasty things, and it would have been rather unpleasant for the
+rest of us. I think I won't tell Betty _where_ I met the fairy.'
+
+She came in and took her place demurely at the family luncheon, which
+was the children's dinner; they were all seated already, including her
+father, who had got through most of his writing in the course of the
+morning.
+
+'Now make haste and eat your dinner, Priscilla,' said her mother, 'or it
+will be quite cold.'
+
+'I always let it get a little cold, mother,' replied the good little
+girl, 'so that I mayn't come to think too much about eating, you know.'
+
+As she uttered this remark, she felt a jewel producing itself in some
+mysterious way from the tip of her tongue, and saw it fall with a
+clatter into her plate. 'I'll pretend not to notice anything,' she
+thought.
+
+'Hullo!' exclaimed Alick, pausing in the act of mastication, 'I
+say--_Prissie_!'
+
+'If you ask mother, I'm sure she will tell you that it is most
+ill-mannered to speak with your mouth full,' said Priscilla, her speech
+greatly impeded by an immense emerald.
+
+'I like that!' exclaimed her rude brother; 'who's speaking with their
+mouth full _now_?'
+
+'"_Their_" is not grammar, dear,' was Priscilla's only reply to this
+taunt, as she delicately ejected a pearl, 'you should say _her_ mouth
+full.' For Priscilla's grammar was as good as her principles.
+
+'But really, Priscilla, dear,' said her mother, who felt some
+embarrassment at so novel an experience as being obliged to find fault
+with her little daughter, 'you should not eat sweets just before dinner,
+and--and couldn't you get rid of them in some other manner?'
+
+'Sweets!' cried Priscilla, considerably annoyed at being so
+misunderstood, 'they are not _sweets,_ mother. Look!' And she offered to
+submit one for inspection.
+
+'If I may venture to express an opinion,' observed her father, 'I would
+rather that a child of mine should suck sweets than coloured beads, and
+in either case I object to having them prominently forced upon my
+notice at meal-times. But I daresay I'm wrong. I generally am.'
+
+'Papa is quite right, dear,' said her mother, 'it _is_ such a dangerous
+habit--suppose you were to swallow one, you know! Put them in the fire,
+like a good girl, and go on with your dinner.'
+
+Priscilla rose without a word, her cheeks crimsoning, and dropped the
+pearl, ruby, and emerald, with great accuracy, into the very centre of
+the fire. This done, she returned to her seat, and went on with her
+dinner in silence, though her feelings prevented her from eating very
+much.
+
+'If they choose to think my pearls are only beads, or jujubes, or
+acidulated drops,' she said to herself, bitterly, 'I won't waste any
+more on them, that's all! I won't open my lips again, except to say
+quite ordinary things--so _there_!'
+
+If Priscilla had not been such a very good little girl, you might almost
+have thought she was in a temper; but she was not; her feelings were
+wounded, that was all, which is quite a different thing.
+
+That afternoon, her aunt Margarine, Mrs. Hoyle, came to call. She was
+the aunt whom we have already mentioned as being given to insincerity;
+she was not well off, and had a tendency to flatter people; but
+Priscilla was fond of her notwithstanding, and she had never detected
+her in any insincerity towards herself. She was sent into the
+drawing-room to entertain her aunt until her mother was ready to come
+down, and her aunt, as usual, overwhelmed her with affectionate
+admiration. 'How pretty and well you are looking, my pet!' she began,
+'and oh, what a beautiful frock you have on!'
+
+'The little silkworms wore it before I did, aunt,' said Priscilla,
+modestly.
+
+'How sweet of you to say so! But they never looked half so well in it,
+I'll be bou---- Why, my child, you've dropped a stone out of a brooch or
+something. Look--on the carpet there!'
+
+'Oh,' said Priscilla, carelessly, 'it was out of my mouth--not out of a
+brooch, I never wear jewellery. I think jewellery makes people grow so
+conceited; don't you, Aunt Margarine?'
+
+'Yes, indeed, dearest--indeed you are _so_ right!' said her aunt (who
+wore a cameo-brooch as large as a tart upon her cloak), 'and--and surely
+that can't be a _diamond_ in your lap?'
+
+'Oh, yes, it is. I met a fairy this morning in the lane, and so----' and
+here Priscilla proceeded to narrate her wonderful experience. 'I thought
+it might perhaps make papa and mamma value me a little more than they
+do,' she said wistfully, as she finished her story, 'but they don't take
+the least notice; they made me put the jewels on the fire--they did,
+really!'
+
+'What blindness!' cried her aunt; 'how _can_ people shut their eyes to
+such a treasure? And--and may I just have _one_ look? What, you really
+don't want them?--I may keep them for my very own? You precious love!
+Ah, I know a humble home where you would be appreciated at your proper
+worth. What would I not give for my poor naughty Belle and Cathie to
+have the advantage of seeing more of such a cousin!'
+
+'I don't know whether I could do them much good,' said Priscilla, 'but I
+would try my best.'
+
+'I am sure you would!' said Aunt Margarine, 'and now, dearest sweet, I
+am going to ask your dear mamma to spare you to us for just a little
+while; we must both beg very hard.'
+
+'I'll go and tell nurse to pack my things now, and then I can go away
+with you,' said the little girl.
+
+When her mother heard of the invitation, she consented quite willingly.
+'To tell you the truth, Margarine,' she said, 'I shall be very glad for
+the child to have a change. She seems a little unhappy at home with us,
+and she behaved most unlike her usual self at lunch; it _can't_ be
+natural for a child of her age to chew large glass beads. Did your
+Cathie and Belle ever do such a thing?'
+
+'Never,' said Aunt Margarine, coughing. 'It is a habit that certainly
+ought to be checked, and I promise you, my dear Lucy, that if you will
+only trust Priscilla to me, I will take away anything of that kind the
+very moment I find it. And I do think, poor as we are, we shall manage
+to make her feel at home. We are all so fond of your sweet Priscilla!'
+
+So the end of it was that Priscilla went to stay with her aunt that
+very afternoon, and her family bore the parting with the greatest
+composure.
+
+'I can't give you nice food, or a pretty bedroom to sleep in such as you
+have at home,' said her kind aunt. 'We are very plain people, my pet;
+but at least we can promise you a warm welcome.'
+
+'Oh, auntie,' protested Priscilla, 'you mustn't think I mind a little
+hardship! Why, if beds weren't hard and food not nicely cooked now and
+then, we should soon grow too luxurious to do our duty, and that would
+be so very bad for us!'
+
+'Oh, what _beauties_!' cried her aunt, involuntarily, as she stooped to
+recover several sparkling gems from the floor of the cab. 'I mean--it's
+better to pick them up, dear, don't you think? they might get in
+people's _way_, you know. What a blessing you will be in our simple
+home! I want you to do all you can to instruct your cousins; don't be
+afraid of telling them of any faults you may happen to see. Poor Cathie
+and Belle, I fear they are very far from being all they should be!' and
+Aunt Margarine heaved a sigh.
+
+'Never mind, auntie; they will be better in time, I am sure. _I_ wasn't
+_always_ a good girl.'
+
+Priscilla thoroughly enjoyed the first few days of her visit; even her
+aunt was only too grateful for instruction, and begged that Priscilla
+would tell her, quite candidly, of any shortcomings she might notice.
+And Priscilla, very kindly and considerately, always _did_ tell her.
+Belle and Catherine were less docile, and she saw that it would take her
+some time to win their esteem and affection; but this was just what
+Priscilla liked: it was the usual experience of the heroines in the
+books, and much more interesting, too, than conquering her cousins'
+hearts at once.
+
+Still, both Catherine and Belle persistently hardened their hearts
+against their gentle little cousin in the unkindest way; they would
+scarcely speak to her, and chose to make a grievance out of the fact
+that one or other of them was obliged, by their mother's strict orders,
+to be constantly in attendance upon her, in order to pick up and bring
+Mrs. Hoyle all the jewels that Priscilla scattered in profusion wherever
+she went.
+
+'If you would only carry a plate about with you, Priscilla,' complained
+Belle one day, 'you could catch the jewels in that.'
+
+'But I don't _want_ to catch the jewels, dear Belle,' said Priscilla,
+with a playful but very sweet smile; 'if other people prize such things,
+that is not my fault, is it? _Jewels_ do not make people any happier,
+Belle!'
+
+'I should think not!' exclaimed Belle. 'I'm sure my back perfectly aches
+with stooping, and so does Cathie's. There! that big topaz has just gone
+and rolled under the sideboard, and mother will be so angry if I don't
+get it out! It is too bad of you, Priscilla! _I_ believe you do it on
+purpose!'
+
+'Ah, you will know me better some day, dear, was the gentle response.
+
+'Well, at all events, I think you might be naughty just now and then,
+Prissie, and give Cathie and me a half-holiday.'
+
+'I would do anything else to please you, dear, but not that; you must
+not ask me to do what is impossible.'
+
+Alas! not even this angelic behaviour, not even the loving admonitions,
+the tender rebukes, the shocked reproaches that fell, accompanied by
+perfect cascades of jewels, from the lips of our pattern little
+Priscilla, succeeded in removing the utterly unfounded prejudices of her
+cousins, though it was some consolation to feel that she was gradually
+acquiring a most beneficial influence over her aunt, who called
+Priscilla 'her little conscience.' For, you see, Priscilla's conscience
+had so little to do on her own account that it was always at the service
+of other people, and indeed quite enjoyed being useful, as was only
+natural to a conscientious conscience which felt that it could never
+have been created to be idle.
+
+Very soon another responsibility was added to little Priscilla's
+burdens. Her cousin Dick, the worldly one with the yellow boots, came
+home after his annual holiday, which, as he was the junior clerk in a
+large bank, he was obliged to take rather late in the year. She had
+looked forward to his return with some excitement. Dick, she knew, was
+frivolous and reckless in his habits--he went to the theatre
+occasionally and frequently spent an evening in playing billiards and
+smoking cigars at a friend's house. There would be real credit in
+reforming poor cousin Dick.
+
+He was not long, of course, in hearing of Priscilla's marvellous
+endowment, and upon the first occasion they were alone together treated
+her with a respect and admiration which he had very certainly never
+shown her before.
+
+'You're wonderful, Prissie!' he said; 'I'd no idea you had it in you!'
+
+'Nor had I, Dick; but it shows that even a little girl can do
+something.'
+
+'I should rather think so! and--and the way you look--as grave as a
+judge all the time! Prissie, I wish you'd tell me how you manage it, I
+wouldn't tell a soul.'
+
+'But I don't know, Dick. I only talk and the jewels come--that is all.'
+
+'You artful little girl! you can keep a secret, I see, but so can I. And
+you might tell me how you do the trick. What put you up to the dodge?
+I'm to be trusted, I assure you.'
+
+'Dick, you can't--you mustn't--think there is any trickery about it! How
+can you believe I could be such a wicked little girl as to play tricks?
+It was an old fairy that gave me the gift. I'm sure I don't know
+why--unless she thought that I was a good child and deserved to be
+encouraged.'
+
+'By Jove!' cried Dick, 'I never knew you were half such fun!'
+
+'I am not fun, Dick. I think fun is generally so very vulgar, and oh, I
+wish you wouldn't say "by Jove!" Surely you know he was a heathen god!'
+
+'I seem to have heard of him in some such capacity,' said Dick. 'I say,
+Prissie, what a ripping big ruby!'
+
+'Ah, Dick, Dick, you are like the others! I'm afraid you think more of
+the jewels than of any words I may say--and yet _jewels_ are common
+enough!'
+
+'They seem to be with you. Pearls, too, and such fine ones! Here,
+Priscilla, take them; they're your property.'
+
+Priscilla put her hands behind her: 'No, indeed, Dick, they are of no
+use to me. Keep them, please; they may help to remind you of what I have
+said.'
+
+'It's awfully kind of you,' said Dick, looking really touched.
+'Then--since you put it in that way--thanks, I will, Priscilla. I'll
+have them made into a horse-shoe pin.'
+
+'You mustn't let it make you too fond of dress, then,' said Priscilla;
+'but I'm afraid you're that already, Dick.'
+
+'A diamond!' he cried; 'go on, Priscilla, I'm listening--pitch into me,
+it will do me a _lot_ of good!'
+
+But Priscilla thought it wisest to say no more just then.
+
+That night, after Priscilla and Cathie and Belle had gone to bed, Dick
+and his mother sat up talking until a late hour.
+
+'Is dear little cousin Priscilla to be a permanency in this
+establishment?' began her cousin, stifling a yawn, for there had been a
+rather copious flow of precious stones during the evening.
+
+'Well, I shall keep her with us as long as I can,' said Mrs. Hoyle,
+'she's such a darling, and they don't seem to want her at home. I'm
+sure, limited as my means are, I'm most happy to have such a visitor.'
+
+'She seems to pay her way--only her way is a trifle trying at times,
+isn't it? She lectured me for half an hour on end without a single
+check!'
+
+'Are you sure you picked them all up, dear boy?'
+
+'Got a few of the best in my waistcoat-pocket now. I'm afraid I
+scrunched a pearl or two, though: they were all over the place, you
+know. I suppose you've been collecting too, mater?'
+
+'I picked up one or two,' said his mother; 'I should think I must have
+nearly enough now to fill a bandbox. And that brings me to what I wanted
+to consult you about, Richard. How are we to dispose of them? She has
+given them all to me.'
+
+'You haven't done anything with them yet, then?'
+
+'How could I? I have been obliged to stay at home: I've been so afraid
+of letting that precious child go out of my sight for a single hour,
+for fear some unscrupulous persons might get hold of her. I thought that
+perhaps, when you came home, you would dispose of the jewels for me.'
+
+'But, mater,' protested Dick, 'I can't go about asking who'll buy a
+whole bandbox full of jewels!'
+
+'Oh, very well, then; I suppose we must go on living this hugger-mugger
+life when we have the means of being as rich as princes, just because
+you are too lazy and selfish to take a little trouble!'
+
+'I know something about these things,' said Dick. 'I know a fellow who's
+a diamond merchant, and it's not so easy to sell a lot of valuable
+stones as you seem to imagine, mother. And then Priscilla really
+overdoes it, you know--why, if she goes on like this, she'll make
+diamonds as cheap as currants!'
+
+'_I_ should have thought that was a reason for selling them as soon as
+possible; but I'm only a woman, and of course _my_ opinion is worth
+nothing! Still, you might take some of the biggest to your friend, and
+accept whatever he'll give you for them--there are plenty more, you
+needn't haggle over the price.'
+
+'He'd want to know all about them, and what should I say? I can't tell
+him a cousin of mine produces them whenever she feels disposed.'
+
+'You could say they have been in the family for some time, and you are
+obliged to part with them; I don't ask you to tell a falsehood,
+Richard.'
+
+'Well, to tell you the honest truth,' said Dick, 'I'd rather have
+nothing to do with it. I'm not proud, but I shouldn't like it to get
+about among our fellows at the bank that I went about hawking diamonds.'
+
+'But, you stupid, undutiful boy, don't you see that you could leave the
+bank--you need never do anything any more--we should all live rich and
+happy somewhere in the country, if we could only sell those jewels! And
+you won't do that one little thing!'
+
+'Well,' said Dick, 'I'll think over it. I'll see what I can do.'
+
+And his mother knew that it was perfectly useless to urge him any
+further: for, in some things, Dick was as obstinate as a mule, and, in
+others, far too easy-going and careless ever to succeed in life. He had
+promised to think over it, however, and she had to be contented with
+that.
+
+On the evening following this conversation cousin Dick entered the
+sitting-room the moment after his return from the City, and found his
+mother to all appearances alone.
+
+'What a dear sweet little guileless angel cousin Priscilla is, to be
+sure!' was his first remark.
+
+'Then you _have_ sold some of the stones!' cried Aunt Margarine. 'Sit
+down, like a good boy, and tell me all about it.'
+
+'Well,' said Dick, 'I took the finest diamonds and rubies and pearls
+that escaped from that saintlike child last night in the course of some
+extremely disparaging comments on my character and pursuits--I took
+those jewels to Faycett and Rosewater's in New Bond Street--you know the
+shop, on the right-hand side as you go up----'
+
+'Oh, go on, Dick; go on--never mind _where_ it is--how much did you get
+for them?'
+
+'I'm coming to that; keep cool, dear mamma. Well, I went in, and I saw
+the manager, and I said: "I want you to make these up into a horse-shoe
+scarf-pin for me."'
+
+'You said that! You never tried to sell one? Oh, Dick, you are too
+provoking!'
+
+'Hold on, mater; I haven't done yet. So the manager--a very gentlemanly
+person, rather thin on the top of the head--not that that affects his
+business capacities; for, after all----'
+
+'Dick, do you want to drive me frantic!'
+
+'I can't conceive any domestic occurrence which would be more
+distressing or generally inconvenient, mother dear. You do interrupt a
+fellow so! I forgot where I was now--oh, the manager, ah yes! Well, the
+manager said, "We shall be very happy to have the stones made in any
+design you may select"--jewellery, by the way, seems to exercise a most
+refining influence upon the manners: this man had the deportment of a
+duke--"you may select," he said; "but of course I need not tell you that
+none of these stones are genuine."'
+
+'Not genuine!' cried Aunt Margarine excitedly. 'They must be--he was
+lying!'
+
+'West-end jewellers never lie,' said Dick; 'but naturally, when he said
+that, I told him I should like to have some proof of his assertion.
+"Will you take the risk of testing?" said he. "Test away, my dear man!"
+said I. So he brought a little wheel near the emerald--"whizz!" and away
+went the emerald! Then he let a drop of something fall on the ruby--and
+it fizzled up for all the world like pink champagne. "Go on, don't mind
+_me_!" I told him, so he touched the diamond with an electric
+wire--"phit!" and there was only something that looked like the ash of a
+shocking bad cigar. Then the pearls--and they popped like so many
+air-balloons. "Are you satisfied?" he asked.
+
+'"Oh, perfectly,"' said I, "you needn't trouble about the horse-shoe pin
+now. Good evening," and so I came away, after thanking him for his very
+amusing scientific experiments.'
+
+'And do you believe that the jewels are all shams, Dick?--do you
+really?'
+
+'I think it so probable that nothing on earth will induce me to offer a
+single one for sale. I should never hear the last of it at the bank. No,
+mater, dear little Priscilla's sparkling conversation may be unspeakably
+precious from a moral point of view, but it has no commercial value.
+Those jewels are bogus--shams every stone of them!'
+
+Now, all this time our heroine had been sitting unperceived in a corner
+behind a window-curtain, reading 'The Wide, Wide World,' a work which
+she was never weary of perusing. Some children would have come forward
+earlier, but Priscilla was never a forward child, and she remained as
+quiet as a little mouse up to the moment when she could control her
+feelings no longer.
+
+'It isn't true!' she cried passionately, bursting out of her retreat and
+confronting her cousin; 'it's cruel and unkind to say my jewels are
+shams! They are real--they are, they _are_!'
+
+'Hullo, Prissie!' said her abandoned cousin; 'so you combine
+jewel-dropping with eaves-dropping, eh?'
+
+'How dare you!' cried Aunt Margarine, almost beside herself, 'you odious
+little prying minx, setting up to teach your elders and your betters
+with your cut and dried priggish maxims! When I think how I have petted
+and indulged you all this time, and borne with the abominable litter you
+left in every room you entered--and now to find you are only a little,
+conceited, hypocritical impostor--oh, _why_ haven't I words to express
+my contempt for such conduct--why am I dumb at such a moment as this?'
+
+'Come, mother,' said her son soothingly, 'that's not such a bad
+beginning; I should call it fairly fluent and expressive, myself.'
+
+'Be quiet, Dick! I'm speaking to this wicked child, who has obtained our
+love and sympathy and attention on false pretences, for which she ought
+to be put in prison--yes, in _prison_, for such a heartless trick on
+relatives who can ill afford to be so cruelly disappointed!'
+
+'But, aunt!' expostulated poor Priscilla, 'you always said you only kept
+the jewels as souvenirs, and that it did you so much good to hear me
+talk!'
+
+'Don't argue with _me_, miss! If I had known the stones were wretched
+tawdry imitations, do you imagine for an instant----?'
+
+'Now, mother,' said Dick, 'be fair--they were uncommonly good
+imitations, you must admit that!'
+
+'Indeed, indeed I thought they were real, the fairy never told me!'
+
+'After all,' said Dick, 'it's not Priscilla's fault. She can't help it
+if the stones aren't real, and she made up for quality by quantity
+anyhow; didn't you, Prissie?'
+
+'Hold your tongue, Richard; she _could_ help it, she knew it all the
+time, and she's a hateful, sanctimonious little stuck-up viper, and so I
+tell her to her face!'
+
+Priscilla could scarcely believe that kind, indulgent, smooth-spoken
+Aunt Margarine could be addressing such words to her; it frightened her
+so much that she did not dare to answer, and just then Cathie and Belle
+came into the room.
+
+'Oh, mother,' they began penitently, 'we're _so_ sorry, but we couldn't
+find dear Prissie anywhere, so we haven't picked up anything the whole
+afternoon!'
+
+'Ah, my poor darlings, you shall never be your cousin's slaves any more.
+Don't go near her, she's a naughty, deceitful wretch; her jewels are
+false, my sweet loves, false! She has imposed upon us all, she does not
+deserve to associate with you!'
+
+'I always said Prissie's jewels looked like the things you get on
+crackers!' said Belle, tossing her head.
+
+'Now we shall have a little rest, I hope,' chimed in Cathie.
+
+'I shall send her home to her parents this very night,' declared Aunt
+Margarine; 'she shall not stay here to pervert our happy household with
+her miserable _gewgaws_!'
+
+Here Priscilla found her tongue. 'Do you think I _want_ to stay?' she
+said proudly; 'I see now that you only wanted to have me here
+because--because of the horrid jewels, and I never knew they were false,
+and I let you have them all, every one, you know I did; and I wanted you
+to mind what I said and not trouble about picking them up, but you
+_would_ do it! And now you all turn round upon me like this! What have I
+done to be treated so? What have I done?'
+
+'Bravo, Prissie!' cried Dick. 'Mother, if you ask me, I think it serves
+us all jolly well right, and it's a downright shame to bullyrag poor
+Prissie in this way!'
+
+'I _don't_ ask you,' retorted his mother, sharply; 'so you will kindly
+keep your opinions to yourself.'
+
+'Tra-la-la!' sang rude Dick, 'we are a united family--we are, we are, we
+_are_!'--a vulgar refrain he had picked up at one of the burlesque
+theatres he was only too fond of frequenting.
+
+But Priscilla came to him and held out her hand quite gratefully and
+humbly. 'Thank you, Dick,' she said; '_you_ are kind, at all events. And
+I am sorry you couldn't have your horse-shoe pin!'
+
+'Oh, _hang_ the horse-shoe pin!' exclaimed Dick, and poor Priscilla was
+so thoroughly cast down that she quite forgot to reprove him.
+
+She was not sent home that night after all, for Dick protested against
+it in such strong terms that even Aunt Margarine saw that she must give
+way; but early on the following morning Priscilla quitted her aunt's
+house, leaving her belongings to be sent on after her.
+
+She had not far to walk, and it so happened that her way led through the
+identical lane in which she had met the fairy. Wonderful to relate,
+there, on the very same stone and in precisely the same attitude, sat
+the old lady, peering out from under her poke-bonnet, and resting her
+knotty old hands on her crutch-handled stick!
+
+Priscilla walked past with her head in the air, pretending not to
+notice her, for she considered that the fairy had played her a most
+malicious and ill-natured trick.
+
+'Heyday!' said the old lady (it is only fairies who can permit
+themselves such old-fashioned expressions nowadays). 'Heyday, why,
+here's my good little girl again! Isn't she going to speak to me?'
+
+'No, she's not,' said Priscilla--but she found herself compelled to
+stop, notwithstanding.
+
+'Why, what's all this about? You're not going to sulk with me, my dear,
+are you?'
+
+'I think you're a very cruel, bad, unkind old woman for deceiving me
+like this!'
+
+'Goodness me! Why, didn't the jewels come, after all?'
+
+'Yes--they came, only they were all horrid artificial ones--and it is a
+shame, it _is_!' cried poor Priscilla from her bursting heart.
+
+'Artificial, were they? that really is very odd! Can you account for
+that at all, now?'
+
+'Of course I can't! You told me that they would drop out whenever I said
+anything to improve people--and I was _always_ saying _something_
+improving! Aunt had a bandbox in her room quite full of them.'
+
+'Ah, you've been very industrious, evidently; it's unfortunate your
+jewels should all have been artificial--most unfortunate. I don't know
+how to explain it, unless'--(and here the old lady looked up queerly
+from under her white eyelashes), 'unless your goodness was artificial
+too?'
+
+'How do you mean?' asked Priscilla, feeling strangely uncomfortable.
+'I'm sure I've never done anything the least bit naughty--how can my
+goodness possibly be artificial?'
+
+'Ah, that I can't explain; but I know this--that people who are really
+good are generally the last persons to suspect it, and the moment they
+become aware of it and begin to think how good they are, and how bad
+everybody else is, why, somehow or other, their goodness crumbles away
+and leaves only a sort of outside shell behind it. And--I'm very old,
+and of course I may be mistaken--but I think (I only say I _think_,
+mind) that a little girl so young as you must have some faults hidden
+about her somewhere, and that perhaps on the whole she would be better
+employed in trying to find them out and cure them before she attempted
+to correct those of other people. And I'm sure it can't be good for any
+child to be always seeing herself in a little picture, just as she likes
+to fancy other people see her. Very many pretty books are written about
+good little girls, and it is quite true that children may exercise a
+great influence for good--more than they can ever tell, perhaps--but
+only just so long as they remain natural and unconscious, and not
+unwholesome little pragmatical prigesses; for then they make themselves
+and other people worse than they might have been. But of course, my
+dear, you never made such a mistake as that!'
+
+Priscilla turned very red, and began to scrape one of her feet against
+the other; she was thinking, and her thoughts were not at all pleasant
+ones.
+
+'Oh, fairy,' she said at last, 'I'm afraid that's just what I _did_ do.
+I was always thinking how good I was and putting everybody--papa, mamma,
+Alick, Betty, Aunt Margarine, Cathie, Belle, and even poor cousin
+Dick--right! I have been a horrid little hateful prig, and that's why
+all the jewels were rubbish. But, oh, shall I have to go on talking sham
+diamonds and things all the rest of my life?'
+
+'That,' said the fairy, 'depends entirely on yourself. You have the
+remedy in your own hands--or lips.'
+
+'Ah, you mean I needn't talk at all? But I must--sometimes. I couldn't
+bear to be dumb as long as I lived--and it would look so odd, too!'
+
+'I never said you were not to open your lips at all. But can't you try
+to talk simply and naturally--not like little girls or boys in any
+story-books whatever--not to "show off" or improve people; only as a
+girl would talk who remembers that, after all, her elders are quite as
+likely as she is to know what they ought or ought not to do and say?'
+
+'I shall forget sometimes, I know I shall!' said Priscilla
+disconsolately.
+
+'If you do, there will be something to remind you, you know. And by and
+by, perhaps, as you grow up you may, quite by accident, say something
+sincere and noble and true--and then a jewel will fall which will really
+be of value!'
+
+'No!' cried Priscilla, 'no, _please_! Oh, fairy, let me off that! If I
+_must_ drop them, let them be false ones to punish me--not real. I don't
+want to be rewarded any more for being good--if I ever am really good!'
+
+'Come,' said the fairy, with a much pleasanter smile, 'you are not a
+hopeless case, at all events. It shall be as you wish, then, and perhaps
+it will be the wisest arrangement for all parties. Now run away home,
+and see how little use you can make of your fairy gift.'
+
+Priscilla found her family still at breakfast.
+
+'Why,' observed her father, raising his eyebrows as she entered the
+room, 'here's our little monitor--(or is it _monitress_, eh,
+Priscilla?)--back again. Children, we shall all have to mind our p's and
+q's--and, indeed, our entire alphabet, now!'
+
+'I'm sure,' said her mother, kissing her fondly, 'Priscilla knows we're
+all delighted to have her home!'
+
+'_I'm_ not,' said Alick, with all a boy's engaging candour.
+
+'Nor am I,' added Betty, 'it's been ever so much nicer at home while
+she's been away!'
+
+Priscilla burst into tears as she hid her face upon her mother's
+protecting shoulder. 'It's true!' she sobbed, 'I don't deserve that you
+should be glad to see me--I've been hateful and horrid, I know--but, oh,
+if you'll only forgive me and love me and put up with me a little, I'll
+try not to preach and be a prig any more--I will truly!'
+
+And at this her father called her to his side and embraced her with a
+fervour he had not shown for a very long time.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+I should not like to go so far as to assert that no imitation diamond,
+ruby, pearl, or emerald ever proceeded from Priscilla's lips again.
+Habits are not cured in a day, and fairies--however old they may be--are
+still fairies; so it _did_ occasionally happen that a mock jewel made an
+unwelcome appearance after one of Priscilla's more unguarded utterances.
+But she was always frightfully ashamed and abashed by such an accident,
+and buried the imitation stones immediately in a corner of the garden.
+And as time went on the jewels grew smaller and smaller, and frequently
+dissolved upon her tongue, leaving a faintly bitter taste, until at last
+they ceased altogether and Priscilla became as pleasant and unaffected a
+girl as she who may now be finishing this history.
+
+Aunt Margarine never sent back the contents of that bandbox; she kept
+the biggest stones and had a brooch made of them, while, as she never
+mentioned that they were false, no one out of the family ever so much
+as suspected it.
+
+But, for all that, she always declared that her niece Priscilla had
+bitterly disappointed her expectations--which was perhaps the truest
+thing that Aunt Margarine ever said.
+
+
+
+
+_A MATTER OF TASTE_
+
+PART I
+
+
+It is a little singular that, upon an engagement becoming known and
+being discussed by the friends and acquaintances of the persons
+principally concerned, by far the most usual tone of comment should be a
+sorrowing wonder. That particular alliance is generally the very last
+that anybody ever expected. 'What made him choose _her_, of all people,'
+and 'What on earth she could see in _him_,' are declared insoluble
+problems. It is confidently predicted that the engagement will never
+come to anything, or that, if such a marriage ever does take place, it
+is most unlikely to prove a success.
+
+Sometimes, in the case of female friends, this tone is even perceptible
+under their warmest felicitations, and through the smiling mask of
+compliment shine eyes moist with the most irritating quality of
+compassion. 'So glad! so delighted! But why, _why_ didn't you consult
+_me_?'--this complicated expression might be rendered: 'I could have
+saved you from this--I _was_ so pleased to hear of it!'
+
+And yet, in the majority of cases, these unions are not found to turn
+out so very badly after all, and the misguided couple seem really to
+have gauged their own hearts and their possibilities of happiness
+together more accurately than the most clear-sighted of their
+acquaintances.
+
+The announcement that Ella Hylton had accepted George Chapman provoked
+the customary sensation and surprise in their respective sets, and
+perhaps with rather more justification than usual.
+
+Miss Hylton had undeniable beauty of a spiritual and rather _exalté_
+type, and was generally understood to be highly cultivated. She had
+spent a year at Somerville, though she had gone down without trying for
+a place in either 'Mods.' or 'Greats,' thereby preserving, if not
+increasing, her reputation for superiority. She had lived all her life
+among cultured people; she was devoted to music and regularly attended
+the Richter Concerts, though she could seldom be induced to play in
+public; she had a feeling for art, though she neither painted nor drew;
+a love of literature strong enough to deter her from all amateur efforts
+in that direction. In art, music and literature she was impatient of
+mediocrity; and, while she was as fond as most girls of the pleasures
+which upper middle-class society can offer, she reverenced intellect,
+and preferred the conversation of the plainest celebrity to the
+platitudes of the mere dancing-man, no matter how handsome of feature
+and perfect of step he might be.
+
+George Chapman was certainly not a mere dancing-man, his waltzing being
+rather conscientious than dreamlike, and he was only tolerably
+good-looking. On the other hand, he was not celebrated in any way, and
+even his mother and sisters had never considered him brilliant. He had
+been educated at Rugby and Trinity, Cambridge, where he rowed a fairly
+good oar, on principle, and took a middle second in the Moral Science
+Tripos. Now he was in a solicitor's office, where he was receiving a
+good salary, and was valued as a steady, sensible young fellow, who
+could be thoroughly depended upon. He was fond of his profession, and
+had acquired a considerable knowledge of its details; apart from it he
+had no very decided tastes; he lived a quiet, regular life, and dined
+out and went to dances in moderation; his manner, though he was nearly
+twenty-six, was still rather boyishly blunt.
+
+What there was in him that had found favour in Ella Hylton's fastidious
+eyes the narrator is not rash enough to attempt to particularise. But it
+may be suggested that the most unlikely people may possess their fairy
+rose and ring which render them irresistible to at least one heart, if
+they only have faith to believe in and luck to perceive their power.
+
+So, early in the year, George had plucked up courage to propose to Miss
+Hylton, after meeting and secretly adoring her for some months past, and
+she, to the general astonishment, had accepted him.
+
+He had a private income--not a large one--of his own, and had saved out
+of it. She was entitled under her grandmother's will to a sum which made
+her an heiress in a modest way, and thus there was no reason why the
+engagement should be a long one, and, though no date had been definitely
+fixed for the marriage, it was understood that it should take place at
+some time before the end of the summer.
+
+Soon after the engagement, however, an invalid aunt with whom Ella had
+always been a great favourite was ordered to the south of France, and
+implored her to go with her; which Ella, who had a real affection for
+her relative, as well as a strong sense of duty, had consented to do.
+
+This was a misfortune in one of two ways: it either curtailed that most
+necessary and most delightful period during which _fiancés_ discover one
+another's idiosyncrasies and weaknesses, or it made it necessary to
+postpone the marriage.
+
+George naturally preferred the former, as the more endurable evil; but
+Ella's letters from abroad began to hint more and more plainly at delay.
+Her aunt might remain on the Continent all the summer, and she could not
+possibly leave her; there was so much to be done after her return that
+could not be done in a hurry; they had not even begun to furnish the
+pretty little house on Campden Hill that was to be their new home--it
+would be better to wait till November, or even later.
+
+The mere idea was alarming to George, and he remonstrated as far as he
+dared; but Ella remained firm, and he grew desperate.
+
+He might have spared himself the trouble. About the middle of June
+Ella's aunt--who, of course, had had to leave the Riviera--grew tired of
+travelling, and Ella, to George's intense satisfaction, returned to her
+mother's house in Linden Gardens, Notting Hill.
+
+And now, when our story opens, George, who had managed to get away from
+office-work two hours before his usual time, was hurrying towards Linden
+Gardens as fast as a hansom could take him, to see his betrothed for the
+first time after their long separation.
+
+He was eager, naturally, and a little nervous. Would Ella still persist
+in her wish for delay? or would he be able to convince her that there
+were no obstacles in the way? He felt he had strong arguments on his
+side, if only--and here was the real seat of his anxiety--if only her
+objections were not raised from some other motive! She might have been
+trying to prepare him for a final rupture, and then--'Well,' he
+concluded, with his customary good sense, 'no use meeting trouble
+halfway--in five minutes I shall know for certain!'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+At the same moment Mrs. Hylton and her daughter Flossie, a vivacious
+girl in the transitionary sixteen-year-old stage, were in the
+drawing-room at Linden Gardens. It was the ordinary double drawing-room
+of a London house, but everything in it was beautiful and harmonious.
+The eye was vaguely rested by the delicate and subdued colour of walls
+and hangings; cabinets, antique Persian pottery, rare bits of china, all
+occupied the precise place in which their decorative value was most
+felt; a room, in short, of exceptional individuality and distinction.
+
+Flossie was standing at the window, from which a glimpse could just be
+caught of fresh green foliage and the lodge-gates, with the bustle of
+the traffic in the High Street beyond; Mrs. Hylton was writing at a
+Flemish bureau in the corner.
+
+'I suppose,' said Flossie meditatively, as she fingered a piece of old
+stained glass that was hanging in the window, 'we shall have George here
+this afternoon.'
+
+Mrs. Hylton raised her head. She had a striking face, tinted a clear
+olive, with a high wave of silver hair crowning the forehead; her
+eyebrows were dark, and so were the brilliant eyes; the nose was
+aquiline, and the thin, well-cut mouth a little hard. She was a woman
+who had been much admired in her time, and who still retained a certain
+attraction, though some were apt to find her somewhat cold and
+unsympathetic. Her daughter Ella, for example, was always secretly a
+little in awe of her mother, who, however, had no terrors for audacious,
+outspoken Flossie.
+
+'If he comes, Flossie, he will be very welcome,' she said, 'but I hardly
+expect him yet. George is not likely to neglect his duties, even for
+Ella.'
+
+Flossie pursed her mouth rather scornfully: 'Oh, George is immaculate!'
+she murmured.
+
+'If he was, it would hardly be a reproach,' said her mother, catching
+the word; 'but, at all events, George has thoroughly good principles,
+and is sure to succeed in the world. I have every reason to be pleased.'
+
+'Every reason?--ah! but _are_ you pleased? Mother, dear, you know he's
+as dull as dull!'
+
+'Ella does not find him so--and, Flossie, I don't like to hear you say
+such things, even in Ella's absence.'
+
+'Oh, I never abuse him to Ella; it wouldn't be any use: she's firmly
+convinced that he's perfection--at least she was before she went away.'
+
+'Why? do you mean that she has altered?--have you seen any sign of it,
+Flossie?'
+
+Mrs. Hylton made this inquiry sharply, but not as if such a circumstance
+would be altogether displeasing to her.
+
+'Oh, no; only she hasn't seen him for so long, you know. Perhaps, when
+she comes to look at him with fresh eyes, she'll notice things more. Ah,
+here _is_ George, just getting out of a hansom--so he has played truant
+for once! There's one thing I _do_ think Ella might do--persuade him to
+shave off some of those straggly whiskers. I wonder why he never seems
+to get a hat or anything else like other people's!'
+
+Presently George was announced. He was slightly above middle height,
+broad-shouldered and fresh-coloured; the obnoxious whiskers did indeed
+cover more of his cheeks than modern fashion prescribes for men of his
+age, and had evidently never known a razor; he wore a turn-down collar
+and a necktie of a rather crude red; his clothes were neat and well
+brushed, but not remarkable for their cut.
+
+'Well, my dear George,' said Mrs. Hylton, 'we have seen very little of
+you while Ella has been away.'
+
+'I know,' he said awkwardly; 'I've had a lot of things to look after in
+one way and another.'
+
+'What? after your work at the office was over!' cried Flossie
+incredulously.
+
+'Yes--after that; it's taken up my time a good deal.'
+
+'And so you couldn't spare any to call here--I see!' said Flossie.
+'George,' she added, with a sudden diversion, 'I wonder you aren't
+afraid of catching cold! How _can_ you go about in such absurdly thin
+boots as those?'
+
+'These?' he said, inspecting them doubtfully--they were strong, sensible
+boots with notched and projecting soles of ponderous thickness--'why,
+what's the matter with them, Flossie, eh? Don't you think they're strong
+enough for walking in?'
+
+'No, George; they're the very things for an afternoon dance, and quite a
+lot of couples could dance in them, you see. But for walking--ah, I'm
+afraid you sacrifice too much to appearances.'
+
+'I don't, really!' George protested in all good faith; 'now _do_ I, Mrs.
+Hylton?'
+
+'Flossie is making fun of you, George; you mustn't mind her
+impertinence.'
+
+'Oh, is that all? Do you know, I really thought for the moment that she
+meant they were too small for me! You like getting a rise out of me,
+Flossie, don't you?'
+
+And he laughed with such genuine and good-natured amusement that the
+young lady felt somehow a little small, and almost ashamed, although it
+took the form of suppressed irritation. 'He really ought not to come
+here in such things,' she said to herself; 'and I don't believe that,
+even now, he sees what I meant.'
+
+Just at this point Ella came in, with the least touch of shyness,
+perhaps, at meeting him before witnesses after so long an absence; but
+she only looked the more charming in consequence, and, demure as her
+greeting was, her pretty eyes had a sparkle of pleasure that scattered
+all George Chapman's fears to the winds. Even Flossie felt instinctively
+that straggly-whiskered, red-necktied, thick-booted George had lost
+none of his divinity for Ella.
+
+They did not seem to have much to say to one another, notwithstanding;
+possibly because Ella was called upon to dispense the tea which had just
+been brought in. George sat nursing the hat which Flossie found so
+objectionable, while he balanced a teacup with the anxious eye of a
+juggler out of practice, and the conversation flagged. At last, under
+pretence of renewing his tea, most of which he had squandered upon a
+Persian rug, he crossed to Ella: 'I say,' he suggested, 'don't you think
+you could come out for a little while? I've such lots to tell you
+and--and I want you to go somewhere with me.'
+
+Mrs. Hylton made no objection, beyond stipulating that Ella must not be
+allowed to tire herself after her journey, and so, a few minutes later,
+Miss Hylton came down in her pretty summer hat and light cape, and she
+and George were allowed to set out.
+
+Once outside the house, he drew a long breath of mingled relief and
+pleasure: 'By Jove, Ella, I am glad to get you back again! I say, how
+jolly you do look in that hat! Now, do you know where I'm going to take
+you?'
+
+'It will be quietest in the Gardens,' said Ella.
+
+'Ah, but that's not where you're going now,' he said with a delicious
+assumption of authority; 'you're coming with me to see a certain house
+on Campden Hill you may have heard of.'
+
+'That will be delightful. I do want to see our dear little house again
+very much. And, George, we will go carefully over all the rooms, and
+settle what can be done with each of them. Then we can begin directly;
+we haven't too much time.'
+
+'Perhaps,' he said with a conscious laugh, 'it won't take so much time
+as you think.'
+
+'Oh, but it _must_--to do properly. And while I've been away I've had
+some splendid ideas for some of the rooms--I've planned them out so
+beautifully. You know that delightful little room at the back?--the one
+I said should be your own den, with the window all festooned with
+creepers and looking out on the garden--well----?'
+
+'Take my advice,' he said, 'and don't make any plans till you see it.
+And as for plans, these furnishing fellows do all that--they don't care
+to be bothered with plans.'
+
+'They will have to carry out ours, though. I shall love settling how it
+is all to be--it will be such fun.'
+
+'You wouldn't call it fun if you knew what it was like, I can tell you.'
+
+'But I _do_ know. Mother and I rearranged most of the rooms at home only
+last year--so you see I have some experience. And what experience can
+_you_ have had, if you please?'
+
+Ella had a mental vision as she spoke of the house in Dawson Place when
+George lived with his mother and sisters--a house in which furniture and
+everything else were commonplace and _bourgeois_ to the last degree,
+and where nothing could have been altered since his boyhood; indeed she
+had often secretly pitied him for having to live in such surroundings,
+and admired the filial patience that had made him endure them so long.
+
+'I've had my share, Ella, and I should be very sorry for you to have all
+the worry and bother I've been through over it!'
+
+'But when, George? How? I don't understand.'
+
+'Ah, that's my secret!' he said provokingly; 'and you know, Ella, if we
+began furnishing now, it would take no end of a time, with all these
+wonderful plans of yours, and--and I couldn't stand having to wait till
+next November for you--I couldn't do it!'
+
+'Mother thinks the marriage need not be put off now,' said Ella simply,
+'and we shall have six weeks till then; the house can be quite ready for
+us by the time we want it.'
+
+'Six weeks!' he said impatiently, 'what's six weeks? You've no idea what
+these chaps are, Ella! And then there are all your own things to get,
+and they would take up most of your time. No, we should have had to put
+it off, whatever you may say. And that would mean another
+separation--for, of course, you would go away in August, and I should
+have to stay in town: the office wouldn't give me my fortnight twice
+over--honeymoon or no honeymoon!'
+
+Ella looked completely puzzled. 'But what are you trying to prove
+_now_, George?'
+
+'I was only showing you that, even though you have come back earlier, we
+couldn't possibly have got things ready in time, if I hadn't----' but
+here he stopped. 'No, I want that to be a surprise for you, Ella; you'll
+see presently,' he added.
+
+Ella's delicate eyebrows contracted. 'I like to be prepared for my
+surprises, please, George. Tell me now.'
+
+They had turned up one of the quiet streets leading to the hill. They
+were so near the house that George thought he might abandon further
+mystery, not to mention that he was only too anxious to reveal his
+secret.
+
+'Well, then, Ella, if you must have it,' he said triumphantly, 'the
+house is very nearly ready _now_--what do you think of that?'
+
+'Do you mean that--that it is furnished, George?'
+
+'Papered, painted, decorated, furnished--everything, from top to bottom!
+I thought that would surprise you, Ella!'
+
+'I think,' she answered slowly, 'you might have told me you were doing
+it.'
+
+'What! before it was all done? That would have spoilt it all, dear. I
+should have written, though, if you hadn't been coming home so soon. And
+now it's finished I must say it looks uncommonly jolly. I'm sure you'll
+be pleased with it--it looks quite a different place.'
+
+She tried to smile: 'And did you do it all yourself, George?'
+
+'Well, no--not exactly. I flatter myself I know how to see that the
+work's properly done, and all that; but there are some things I don't
+pretend to be much of a hand at, so I got certain ladies to give me some
+wrinkles.'
+
+Ella felt relieved. She was disappointed, it is true--hurt, even, at
+having been deprived of any voice in the matter. She had been looking
+forward so much to carrying out her pet schemes, to enjoying her
+friends' admiration of the wonders wrought by her artistic invention.
+And she had never thought of George, somehow, as likely to have any
+strikingly original ideas on the subject of decoration, although she
+liked him none the less for that.
+
+But it was something that he had had the good sense to take her mother
+and Flossie into his confidence: she knew she could trust them to
+preserve him from any serious mistakes.
+
+'You see,' said George, half apologetically, 'I would ever so much
+rather have waited till you came back, only I couldn't tell when that
+would be. I really couldn't help myself. You're sure you don't mind
+about it? If you only knew how I worked over it, rushing about from one
+place to another, as soon as I could get away from the office, picking
+up bits of furniture here and there, standing over those beggars of
+painters and keeping 'em at it, and working out estimates and seeing
+foremen and managers and all kinds of chaps! I used to get home
+dead-tired of an evening; but I didn't mind that: I felt it was all
+bringing you nearer to me, darling, and that made everything a
+pleasure!'
+
+There was such honest affection in his look and voice; he had so
+evidently intended to please her, and had been in such manifest dread of
+any further separation from her, that she was completely disarmed.
+
+'Dear George,' she said gently, 'I am so sorry you took all the trouble
+on yourself; it was very, very good of you to care so much, and I know I
+shall be delighted with the house.'
+
+'Well,' said George, 'I'm not much afraid about that, because I expect
+our tastes are pretty much the same in most things.'
+
+They were by this time at the house, and George, after a little fumbling
+with his as yet unfamiliar latchkey, threw open the door with a flourish
+and said, 'There you are, little woman! Walk in and you'll see what you
+shall see!'
+
+No sooner was Ella inside the hall than her heart sank: 'Looks neat and
+nice, doesn't it?' said George cheerfully. 'You'd almost take that paper
+for real marble, wouldn't you? See how well they've done those veins. I
+like this yellowish colour better than green, don't you? It looks so
+cool in summer. That's a good strong hall-lamp--not what you call high
+art, exactly--but gives a rattling good light, and that's the main
+thing. Here, I'll light it up for you--confound it! they haven't turned
+the gas on yet. However, there's too much sunshine for it to show much,
+if they had. This linoleum is a capital thing: you might scrub as long
+as you liked and you'd never get _that_ pattern out!'
+
+'No,' Ella agreed, with a tragic little smile, 'it--it looks as if it
+would last.'
+
+'Last! I should just think so! And here's a hatstand--you could almost
+swear it was carved wood of some sort, but it's only cast-iron painted;
+indestructible, you see; they told me that was the latest
+dodge--wonderful how cheaply they turn them out, isn't it?'
+
+'I thought you said you were helped?'
+
+'Oh, I didn't want any help _here_--this is only the passage, you know!'
+
+Yes, it was only the passage--and yet she had been picturing such a
+charming entrance, with a draped arch, a graceful lamp, a fresh bright
+paper, a small buffet of genuine old oak, and so on. She suppressed a
+sigh as she passed on; after all, so long as the rooms themselves were
+all right, it did not so very much matter, and she knew that her
+mother's taste could be trusted.
+
+But on the threshold of the dining-room she stopped aghast. The walls
+had been distempered a particularly hideous drab; the curtains were
+mustard yellow; the carpet was a dull brown; the mottled marble
+mantelpiece, for which she had been intending to substitute one in
+walnut wood with tiles, still shone in slabs of petrified brawn; there
+was a huge mahogany sideboard of a kind she had only seen in
+old-fashioned hotels.
+
+'Comfortable, eh?' remarked George. 'Lots of wear in those curtains!'
+
+Unhappily there was, as Ella was only too well aware. 'You did _this_
+room yourself too, then, George?' she managed to say, without betraying
+herself by her voice.
+
+'Yes, I chose everything here. You see, Ella, we shall only use this
+room for meals.'
+
+'Only for meals, yes,' she acquiesced with a shudder; 'but--George,
+surely you said mother had helped you with the rooms?'
+
+'What! your mother? No, Ella; her notions are rather too grand for me.
+It was Jessie and Carrie I meant. Just come and see what they've made of
+my den.'
+
+Ella followed. The window--which had commanded such a cheerful outlook
+into one of the pretty gardens, with a pink thorn, a laburnum-tree or
+two, and some sycamores which still flourish fresh and fair on Campden
+Hill--was obscured now by some detestable contrivance in transparent
+paper imitating stained glass.
+
+'That was the girls' notion,' said George, following the direction of
+her eyes; 'they fixed it all themselves--it was their present to me.
+Pretty of them to think of it, wasn't it? I call it an immense
+improvement, and, you see, it's stuck on with some patent cement
+varnish, so it can't rub off. You get the effect better if you stand
+here--_now_, see how well the colours come out in the sun!'
+
+If only they _would_ come out! But what could she do but stand and
+admire hypocritically? Her eyes, in spite of herself, seemed drawn to
+that bright-hued sham intersected by black lines intended to represent
+leading; of the room itself she only saw vaguely that it was not
+unworthy of the window.
+
+'Nothing to what they've done with the drawing-room!' said innocent
+George, beaming; 'come along, darling, you'll scarcely know the place.'
+
+And Ella, reduced to a condition of stony stupor, followed to the
+drawing-room. She did not know the place, indeed. It was a
+quaintly-shaped, irregular room, with French windows opening upon the
+garden on one side and a deep bow-window on another; when she had last
+seen it, the walls were covered with a paper so pleasing in tone and
+design that she had almost decided to retain it. That paper was gone,
+and in its place a gaudy semi-Chinese pattern of unknown birds, flying
+and perching on sprawling branches laden with impossible flowers. And
+then the furniture--the 'elegant drawing-room suite' in brilliant plush
+and shiny satin, the cheap cabinets, and the ready-made black and gilt
+overmantel, with its panels of swans, hawthorn-blossom, and landscapes
+sketchily daubed on dead gold--surely it had all been transferred bodily
+from the stage of some carelessly mounted farcical comedy!
+
+Ella's horrified gaze gradually took in other features--the china
+monkeys swinging on cords, the porcelain parrots hanging in great brass
+rings, huge misshapen terra-cotta jars and pots, dead grass in bloated
+drain-pipes, tambourines, beribboned and painted with kittens and
+robins, enormous wooden _sabots_, gilded Japanese fans, a woolly white
+rug and a bright Kidderminster carpet.
+
+'_Oh_, George!' burst involuntarily from her lips.
+
+'I knew you'd be pleased!' he said complacently; 'but I mustn't take all
+the credit myself. It was like this, you see: I felt all right enough
+about the other rooms, but the drawing-room--that's _your_ room, and I
+was awfully afraid of not having it exactly as it ought to be. So I went
+to the girls, and I said, "_You_ know all about these things--just make
+it what you think Ella will like, and then we can't go wrong!" We had
+that Grosvenor Gallery paper down first of all. "Choose something bright
+and cheerful," I said, and I don't think they've chosen badly. Then the
+pottery and china and all that--those are the girls' presents to _you_,
+with their best love.'
+
+'It--it's very good of them,' said poor Ella, on the verge of tears.
+
+'Oh, they think a lot of you! They were rather nervous about doing
+anything at first, for fear you mightn't like it; but I told them they
+needn't be afraid. "What I like, Ella will like," I said; and, I must
+say, no one could wish to see a prettier drawing-room than they've
+turned it into--they've a good deal of taste, those two girls.'
+
+Ella stood there in a kind of dreary dream. What had happened to the
+world since she came into this house? What was this change in her? She
+was afraid to speak, lest the intense rebellious anger she felt should
+gain the mastery. Was it she that had these wicked thoughts of
+George--poor, kind, unsuspecting, loving George? She felt a little
+faint, for the windows were closed and the room stuffy with the odour of
+the new furniture and the atmosphere of the workshop; everything here
+seemed to her commonplace and repulsive.
+
+'How about those plans of yours now, Ella, eh?' cried George.
+
+This was too much; her overtried patience broke down. 'George!' she
+cried impulsively, and her voice sounded hoarse and strange to her own
+ear; 'George! I must speak--I must tell you!----' and then she checked
+herself. She must keep command of herself, or she could not, without
+utter loss of dignity, find the words that were to sting him into a
+sense of what he had done and allowed to be done. Before she could go
+on, George had drawn her to him, and was patting her shoulder tenderly.
+'I know, dear little girl,' he said, 'I know; don't try to tell me
+anything. I'm so awfully glad you're pleased; but all the money and
+pains in the world wouldn't make the place good enough for my Ella!'
+
+She released herself with a little cry of impotent despair. How could
+she say the sharp, cruel speeches that were struggling to reach her
+tongue now? It was no use; she was a coward; she simply had not the
+courage to undeceive him here, on the very first day of their reunion,
+too!
+
+'You haven't been upstairs yet,' said George, dropping sentiment
+abruptly; 'shall we go up?'
+
+Ella assented submissively, much as even this cost her; but it was
+better, she reflected, to get it over and know the very worst. However,
+she was spared this ordeal for the present; as they returned to the
+hall, they found themselves suddenly face to face with a dingy man,
+whose face was surrounded by a fringe of black whiskers and crowned by a
+shock of fleecy hair.
+
+'Who on earth are you?' demanded George, as the man rose from the
+kitchen-stairs.
+
+'No offence, sir and lady! Peagrum, that's _my_ name, fust shop round
+the corner as you go into Silver Street, plumber and sanitry hengineer,
+gas-fittin' and hartistic decorating, bell-'anging in all its branches.
+I received instructions from Mr. Jones that I was to look into a little
+matter o' leakage in the back-kitchen sink; also to see what taps, if
+hany, required seein' to, and gen'ally to put things straight like. So I
+come round, 'aving the keys, jest to cast a heye over them, as I may
+term it, preliminry to commencing work in the course of a week or so, as
+soon as I'm at libity to attend to it pussonally.'
+
+'Oh, the landlord sent you? All right, then.'
+
+'Correct, sir,' said the plumber affably. 'While I've been 'ere, I took
+the freedom of going all over this little 'ouse, and a nice cosy little
+'ouse you've made of it, for such a nouse as it is! You've done it up
+very tysty--very tysty you've done this little 'ouse up; and I've some
+claim to speak, seein' as how I've had the decoration throughout of a
+many 'ouses in my time, likewise mansions. You ain't been too ambitious,
+which is the error most parties falls into with small 'ouses. Now the
+parties as 'ad the place before you--by the name o' Rummles--well, I
+daresay they satisfied theirselves, but the 'ouse never looked
+right--not to _my_ taste, it didn't!'
+
+'George, get rid of this person!' said Ella rapidly, under her breath,
+in French. Unfortunately, George's acquaintance with that tongue was
+about on a par with the plumber's, and he remained passive.
+
+The plumber now proceeded to put down his mechanic's straw-bag upon the
+hall-table, which he did with great care, as if it were of priceless
+stuff and contained fragile articles; having done this, he posed himself
+with one elbow resting on the post at the foot of the staircase, like a
+grimy statue of Shakespeare.
+
+'Ah,' he said, shaking his touzled head, 'this ain't the fust time I've
+been 'ere in my puffessional capacity, not by a long way. Not by a long
+way, it ain't. Mr. Rummles, him as I mentioned to you afore, and a nice
+pleasant-spoken gentleman he was, too--in the tea trade--Mr. Rummles, he
+allus sent round for me whenever there was hany odd jobs as wanted
+doin', and in course I was allus pleased to get 'em, be they hodd or
+hotherwise.'
+
+'Er-exactly,' said George, as soon as he could put in a word; 'but you
+see, this lady and I----'
+
+The plumber, however, did not abandon his position, and seemed
+determined that they should hear him:
+
+'I know, sir--I see how things were with you with 'arf a glance; but
+afore we go any further, it's right you should know 'oo I am and all
+about me. Jest 'ear what I'm goin' to tell you, for it's somethink out
+of the common way, though gospel-truth. It's a melinkly reflection for a
+man in my station of life, but'--and here he lowered his voice to a
+solemn pitch--'I've never set foot inside of this 'ere 'ouse without
+somethink 'appens more or less immejit. Ah, it's true, though. Seems
+almost like as if I brought a fatality in along o' me. Don't you
+interrupt; you wait till I'm done, and see if I'm talking at random or
+without facks to support me. Well, _fust_ time as ever I was sent for
+'ere was in regard to drains, as they couldn't flush satisfactory. I did
+my work and come away. Not three weeks arter, Miss Rummles, the heldest
+gell, was took ill with typhoid. Never the same young lady again--nor
+yet she never won't be neither, not if she lives to a nundered. "Nothing
+very hodd about _that_?" says you. Wait a bit. Next time, it was the
+kitching copper as had got all furred up like. I tinkered that up to
+rights, and come away. Well, afore I'd even made out my account, that
+identical copper blew up and scalded the cook dreadful! "Coppers will
+play these games," you sez. All right, then; but you let me finish.
+Third time there was a flaw in one of the gas-brackets in the spare
+room. I soddered it up and I come away. Soon arterwards, a day or two as
+it might be, Mrs. Rummles 'ad 'er mar a-stayin' with her, and the old
+lady slep in that very room, and was laid up weeks! "Curus," says I,
+when I come to 'ear of it, "_very_ curus!" and it set me a-thinkin'.
+Last time but one--'ere, lemme see--that was a bell-'anging job, I
+_think_--no, I'm wrong, it was drains agen, so it were--drains it was
+agen. And the _next_ thing I 'eard was that Mrs. Rummles was a-layin' at
+death's door with the diffthery! The last time--ah, I recklect well, I
+was called in to see if somethink wasn't wrong with the ballcock in the
+top cistin. I see there _was_ somethink, and I come away as usual. That
+day week, old Mr. Rummles was took with a fit on the floor in the back
+droring-room, which broke up the 'ouse!
+
+'Now, I think, as fair-minded and unprejudiced parties, you'll agree
+with me that there was something more'n hordinary coinside-ency in all
+that. I declare to you!' avowed the plumber, with a gloomy relish and a
+candour that was possibly begotten of beer, 'I declare to you there's
+times when I do honestly believe as I carry a curse along with me
+whenever I visits this 'ere partickler 'ouse! and, though it's agen my
+own hinterests, I deem it on'y my dooty, as a honest man, to mention
+it!'
+
+Under any other circumstances, the plumber's compliments on her taste
+and his lugubrious assumption of character of the Destroying Angel would
+have sorely tried, if not completely upset, Ella's gravity; as it was,
+she was too wretched to have more than a passing and quite
+unappreciative sense of his absurdity. George, having the quality of
+mind which makes jokes more readily than sees them, took him quite
+seriously.
+
+'Well,' he answered solemnly, 'I hope you won't bring _us_ bad luck, at
+all events!'
+
+'_I_ 'ope so, sir, I'm sure. I _'ope_ so. It will not be by any desire
+on my part, more partickler when you're just settin' up 'ousekeepin'
+with your good lady 'ere. But there's no tellin' in these matters.
+That's where it is, you see--there's no tellin'. And, arter all my
+experence, with the best intentions in the world, I can't go and
+guarantee to you as nothink won't come of it. I wish I could, but, as a
+honest man, I can't. If it's to be,' moralised this fatalistic plumber,
+'it _is_ to be, and that's all about it, and no hefforts on my part or
+yours won't make hany difference, will they, sir?'
+
+'Well, well,' said George, plainly ill at ease, 'that will do, my
+friend. Now, Ella, what do you say--shall we go upstairs?'
+
+'Not now,' she gasped, 'let us go away--. Oh, George, take me outside,
+please!'
+
+'Dash that confounded fool of a plumber!' said George, irritably, when
+they were in the street again; 'wonder if he thinks I'm going to employ
+him after that! Not that it isn't all bosh, of course---- Why, Ella,
+you're not tired, are you?'
+
+'I--I think I am a little--do you mind if we drive home?'
+
+Ella was very silent during their short drive. When they reached Linden
+Gardens she said, 'I think we must say good-bye here, George. I feel as
+if I were going to have a headache.'
+
+'You poor little girl!' he said, looking rather crestfallen, for he had
+been counting upon going in and being invited to remain for dinner,
+'it's been rather too much for you, going over the house and all
+that--or was it that beastly plumber with his rigmaroles?'
+
+'It wasn't the plumber,' she said hurriedly, as the door was opened,
+'and--good-bye, George.'
+
+'How easily girls do get knocked up!' thought George, as he walked
+homeward, 'a little pleasant excitement like this and she seems quite
+upset. She was delighted with the house, though, that's one blessing,
+and I mustn't forget to tell the girls how touched she was by their
+presents. What a darling she is, and how happy we shall be together!'
+
+
+
+
+PART II
+
+
+Once safely at home, Ella hastened upstairs to her own room, where, if
+the truth must be told, she employed the half-hour before dinner in
+unintermittent sobbing, into which temper largely entered. 'He has
+spoilt it all for me! How _could_ he--oh, how could he?' ran the burden
+of her moan. At the dinner-table, though pale and silent, she had
+recovered composure.
+
+'A pleasant walk, Ella?' inquired her mother, with rather formal
+interest.
+
+'Yes, very,' replied Ella, trusting she would not be questioned further.
+
+'I believe I know where you went!' cried indiscreet Flossie. 'You went
+to look at your new home--now, _didn't_ you? Ah, I thought so! I
+suppose you have quite made up your minds how you mean to do the rooms?'
+
+'Quite.'
+
+'We might go round to all the best places to-morrow,' said Mrs. Hylton,
+'and see some papers and hangings--there were some lovely patterns in
+Blank's windows the other day.'
+
+'And, Ella,' added Flossie, 'I've been out with Andrews after school
+several times, to Tottenham Court Road, and Wardour Street, and Oxford
+Street--oh, everywhere, hunting up old furniture, and I can show you
+where they have some beautiful things--not shams, but really good!'
+
+'You know, Ella,' said Mrs. Hylton, observing that she did not answer,
+'I want you to have a pretty house, and you and George must order
+exactly what you like; but I think you will find I may be some help to
+you in choosing.'
+
+'Thank you, mother,' said Ella, without any animation; 'I--I don't think
+we shall want much.'
+
+'You will want all that young people in your position do want, I
+suppose,' said Mrs. Hylton, a little impatiently; 'and of course you
+understand that the bills are to be my affair.'
+
+'Thank you, mother,' murmured Ella again. She didn't feel able to tell
+them just yet how this had all been forestalled; she felt that she would
+infallibly break down if she tried.
+
+'You seem a little overdone to-night, my dear,' said her mother
+frigidly; she was naturally hurt at the very uneffusive way in which her
+good offices had been met.
+
+'I have such a dreadful headache,' pleaded Ella. 'I--I think I overtired
+myself this afternoon.'
+
+'Then you were very foolish, after travelling all yesterday, as you did.
+I don't wonder that George was ashamed to come in. You had better go to
+bed early, and I will send Andrews in to you with some of my sleeping
+mixture.'
+
+Ella was glad enough to obey, though the draught took some time to
+operate; she felt as if no happiness or peace of mind were possible for
+her till George had been persuaded to undo his work.
+
+Surely he could not refuse when he knew that her mother was prepared to
+do everything for them at her own expense!
+
+And here it began to dawn upon her what this would entail! George's
+words came back to her as if she heard them actually spoken. Did he not
+say that the house had been furnished out of his savings?
+
+What was she asking him to do? To dismantle it entirely; to humiliate
+himself by going round to all the people he had dealt with, asking them
+as a favour to take back their goods, or else he must sell them as best
+he could for a fraction of their cost. Who was to refund him all he had
+so uselessly spent? Could she ask her mother to do so? Would he even
+consent to such an arrangement if it was proposed?
+
+Then his sisters--how could she avoid offending them irreparably,
+perhaps involving George in a quarrel with his family, if she were to
+carry her point?
+
+As she realised, for the first time, the inevitable consequences of
+success, she asked herself in despair what she ought to do--where her
+plain duty lay?
+
+Did she love George--or was it all delusion, and was he less to her than
+mere superfluities, the fringe of life?
+
+She did love him, in spite of any passing disloyalty of thought. She
+felt his sterling worth and goodness, even his weaknesses had something
+lovable in them for her.
+
+And he had been planning, spending, working all this time to give her
+pleasure, and this was his reward! She had been within an ace of letting
+him see the cruel ingratitude that was in her heart! 'What a selfish
+wretch I have been!' she thought; 'but I won't be--no, I won't! George
+shall _not_ be snubbed, hurt, estranged from his family on my account!'
+
+No, she would suffer--she alone--and in silence. Never by a word would
+she betray to him the pain his well-intentioned action cost her. Not
+even to her mother and Flossie would she permit herself to utter the
+least complaint, lest they should insist upon opening George's eyes!
+
+So, having arrived at this heroic resolve, in which she found a touch of
+the sublime that almost consoled her, the tears dried on her cheeks and
+Ella fell asleep at last.
+
+Some readers, no doubt--though possibly few of our heroine's sex--will
+smile scornfully at this crumpled rose-leaf agony, this tempest in a
+Dresden teacup; and the writer is not concerned to deny that the
+situation has its ludicrous side.
+
+But, for a girl brought up as Ella Hylton had been, in an artistic
+_milieu_, her eye insensibly trained to love all that was beautiful in
+colour and form, to be almost morbidly sensitive to ugliness and
+vulgarity--it was a very real and bitter struggle, a hard-won victory to
+come to such a decision as she formed. Life, Heaven knows, contains
+worse trials and deeper tragedies than this; but at least Ella's happy
+life had as yet known no harder.
+
+And, so far, she must be given the credit of having conquered.
+
+Resolution is, no doubt, half the battle. Unfortunately, Ella's
+resolution, though she hardly perceived this at present, could not be
+effected by one isolated and final act, but by a long chain of daily and
+hourly forbearances, the first break in which would undo all that had
+gone before.
+
+How she bore the test we are going to see.
+
+She woke the next morning to a sense that her life had somehow lost its
+savour; the exaltation of her resolve overnight had gone off and left
+her spirits flat and dead; but she came down, nevertheless, determined
+to be staunch and true to George under all provocations.
+
+'Have you and George decided when you would like your wedding to be?'
+asked her mother, after breakfast, 'because we ought to have the
+invitations printed very soon.'
+
+'Not yet,' faltered Ella, and the words might have passed either as an
+answer or an appeal.
+
+'I think it should be some time before the end of next month, or people
+will be going out of town.'
+
+'I suppose so,' was the reply, so listlessly given that Mrs. Hylton
+glanced keenly at her daughter.
+
+'What do you feel about it yourself, Ella?'
+
+'I? oh, I--I've no feeling. Perhaps, if we waited--no, it doesn't
+matter--let it be when you and George wish, mother, please!'
+
+Mrs. Hylton gave a sharp, annoyed little laugh: 'Really, my dear, if you
+can't get up any more interest in it than that, I think it would
+certainly be wiser to wait!'
+
+It was more than indifference that Ella felt--a wild aversion to
+beginning the new life that but lately had seemed so mysteriously sweet
+and strange; she was frightened by it, ashamed of it, but she could not
+help herself. She made no answer, nor did Mrs. Hylton again refer to the
+subject.
+
+But Ella's worst tribulations had yet to come. That afternoon, as she
+and her mother and Flossie were sitting in the drawing-room, 'Mrs. and
+the Miss Chapmans' were announced. Evidently they had deemed it
+incumbent on them to pay a state visit as soon as possible after Ella's
+return.
+
+Ella returned their effusive greetings as dutifully as she could. She
+had never succeeded in cultivating a very lively affection for them;
+to-day she found them barely endurable.
+
+Mrs. Chapman was a stout, dewlapped old lady, with dull eyes and
+pachydermatous folds in her face. She had a husky voice and a funereal
+manner. Jessie, her eldest daughter, was not altogether uncomely in a
+commonplace way: she was dark-haired, high-coloured,
+loud-voiced--generally sprightly and voluble and overpowering; she was
+in such a hurry to speak that her words tripped one another up, and she
+had a meaningless and, to Ella, highly irritating little laugh.
+
+Carrie was plain and colourless, content to admire and echo her sister.
+
+After some conversation on Ella's Continental experiences, Jessie
+suddenly, as Ella's uneasy instinct foresaw, turned to Mrs. Hylton. 'Of
+course, Ella told you what a surprise she had at Campden Hill yesterday?
+Weren't you electrified?'
+
+'No doubt I should have been,' said Mrs. Hylton, who detested Jessie,
+'only Ella did not think fit to mention it.'
+
+'Oh, I wonder at that! I hope I wasn't going to betray the secrets of
+the prison-house?' Jessie was fond of using stock phrases to give
+lightness and sparkle to her conversation. 'Ella, the idea of your
+keeping it all to yourself, you sly puss! But tell me--would you ever
+have believed Tumps'--his sisters called George 'Tumps'--'could be
+capable of such independent behaviour?'
+
+'No,' said Ella, 'I--indeed I never should!'
+
+'Ha, ha! nor should we! You would have screamed to see him fussing
+about--wasn't he killing over it, Carrie?'
+
+'Oh, he was, Jessie!'
+
+'My son,' explained Mrs. Chapman to Mrs. Hylton, 'is so wonderfully
+energetic and practical. I have never known him fail to carry through
+anything he has once undertaken--he inherits that from his poor dear
+father.'
+
+'I don't quite gather what your brother George has been doing, even
+now?' said Mrs. Hylton to Jessie.
+
+'Oh, but my lips are sealed. Wild horses sha'n't drag any more from me!
+Don't be afraid, Ella, I won't spoil sport!'
+
+'There is no sport to spoil,' said Ella. 'Mother, it is only that--that
+George has furnished the house while I have been away.'
+
+'Really?' said Mrs. Hylton politely; 'that _is_ energetic of him,
+indeed!'
+
+'Poor dear Tumps came home so proud of your approval,' said Jessie to
+Ella, 'and we were awfully relieved to find you didn't think we'd made
+the house quite too dreadful--weren't we, Carrie?'
+
+'Yes, indeed, Jessie.'
+
+'Of course,' observed the latter young lady, 'it's always so hard to hit
+upon another person's taste exactly--especially in furnishing.'
+
+'Impossible, I should have thought,' from Mrs. Hylton.
+
+'I hope Ella is of a different opinion--what do _you_ say, dearest?'
+
+'Oh,' cried Ella hastily, with splendid mendacity, 'I--I liked it all
+very much, and--and it was so much too kind of you and Carrie. I've
+never thanked you for--for all the things you gave me!'
+
+'Oh, _those_! they ain't worth thanking for--just a few little artistic
+odds and ends. They set off a room, you know--give it a finish.'
+
+'Young people nowadays,' croaked old Mrs. Chapman lugubriously in Mrs.
+Hylton's courteously inclined ear, 'think so much of luxury and
+ornament. I'm sure when I married my dear husband, we----'
+
+'Now, mater dear, you really _mustn't_!' interrupted the irrepressible
+Jessie; 'Mrs. Hylton is on _our_ side, you know. She likes pretty things
+about her--don't you, Mrs. Hylton? And, talking of that, Ella, I hope
+you thought our glyco-vitrine decoration a success? We were perfectly
+surprised ourselves to see how well it came out! Just transparent
+coloured paper, Mrs. Hylton, and you cut it into sheets, and gum it on
+the window-panes, and really, unless you were told or came quite close,
+you would declare it was real stained glass! You ought to try some of it
+on your windows, Mrs. Hylton. I'll tell you where you can get it--you go
+down----'
+
+'I'm afraid I'm old-fashioned, my dear,' said Mrs. Hylton, stiffly; 'if
+I cannot have the reality, I prefer to do without even the best
+imitations.'
+
+'Why, you're deserting us, I declare! Ella, you must take her to see the
+window, and then perhaps she will change her opinion.'
+
+'I always tell my girls,' said Mrs. Chapman, in her woolly voice, 'when
+I am dead and gone they can make any alterations they please, but while
+I am spared to them I like everything about the house to be kept exactly
+as it was in their poor father's lifetime.'
+
+'_Isn't_ she a dear conservative old mummy?' said Jessie to Ella in an
+audible aside. 'Why, I do believe she won't see anything to admire in
+your little house--at least, if she does, the dear old lady, she'd
+sooner die than admit it!'
+
+The Chapmans went at last, and before they were out of the house Mrs.
+Hylton, with an effort to seem unconcerned, said: 'And so, Ella, you and
+George have done without my help? Of course you know your own affairs
+best; still, I should have thought--I should certainly have
+thought--that I might have been of some assistance to you--if only in
+pecuniary matters.'
+
+'George preferred that you should not be troubled,' stammered Ella.
+
+'I am not blaming him. I respect him for wishing to be independent. I
+own to being a little surprised that you should not have told me of this
+before, though, Ella. But for that chattering girl, I presume I should
+have been left to discover it for myself. I wonder you cannot bring
+yourself to be a little more open with your mother, my dear.'
+
+'Oh, mother!' cried Ella in despair, 'indeed I was going to tell
+you--only, I did not know myself till yesterday. At least, that is----'
+she broke off lamely, fearing to reflect on George.
+
+'I find it hard to believe that George would act without consulting you
+in any way. It is strange enough that he should have undertaken to
+furnish the house in your absence.'
+
+'But if I couldn't be there!' pleaded Ella--'and I couldn't.'
+
+'Naturally, as you were on the Continent, you couldn't be on Campden
+Hill at the same time; you need not be absurd, Ella. But what I want to
+know is this--have you had a voice in the matter, or have you not?'
+
+'N--not much,' confessed Ella, hanging her head.
+
+'So I suspected, and I think George ought to be ashamed of himself. I
+never heard of such a thing, and I shall make a point of seeing the
+house and satisfying myself that it is fit for a daughter of mine to
+inhabit.'
+
+'Mother!' exclaimed Ella, springing up excitedly, 'you don't understand.
+Why should you choose to suppose that the house is not pretty? It is not
+done as _you_ would do it, because poor George hadn't much money to
+spend; but if I am satisfied, why should you come between us? And I _am_
+satisfied--quite, quite satisfied; he has done it all beautifully, and I
+will not have a single thing altered! After all, it is _his_ house--our
+house--and nobody else has any right to interfere--not even you,
+mother!'
+
+Mrs. Hylton shrugged her shoulders. 'Oh, my dear, if that is the way you
+think proper to speak to me, it is time to change the subject. Pray
+understand that I shall not dream of interfering. I am very glad that
+you are so satisfied.' And by-and-by she left the room majestically.
+
+When she had gone, Flossie, who had been listening open-eyed to all that
+had taken place, came and stood in front of Ella's chair.
+
+'Ella, tell me,' she said, 'has George really furnished the house
+exactly as you like--_really_ now?'
+
+'Haven't I said so, Flossie? Why should you doubt it?'
+
+'Oh, I don't know; I was wondering, that was all!'
+
+'Really!' cried Ella angrily, 'anyone would think poor George was a sort
+of barbarian, who couldn't be expected to know anything, or trusted to
+do anything!'
+
+'I'm sure I never _said_ so, Ella. But how clever of him to choose just
+the right things! And, Ella, do all the colours and things go well
+together? I always thought most men didn't notice much about all that.
+And are the new mantelpieces pretty? Oh, and where did he go for the
+papers and the carpets?'
+
+'Flossie, I wish you wouldn't tease so. Can't you see I have a headache?
+I can't answer so many questions, and I won't! Once for all, everything
+is just what I like. Do you understand, or shall I tell you
+again?--just, _just_ what I like!'
+
+'Oh, all right,' returned Flossie, with exasperating good-humour; 'then
+there's nothing to lose your temper about, darling, is there?'
+
+And this was all that Ella had gained by her loyalty to George so far.
+
+It was the morning after the Chapmans' visit. Ella had seen her mother
+and Flossie preparing to go out, but, owing to the friction between
+them, they neither invited her to accompany them, nor did she venture to
+ask where they were going. At luncheon, however, the unhappy girl
+divined from the expression of their faces how they had employed the
+forenoon. They had been inspecting the Campden Hill house! Her mother's
+handsome face wore a look of frozen contempt. Imagine a strict Quaker's
+feelings on seeing his son with a pair of black eyes--a Socialist's at
+finding a peerage under his daughter's pillow--a Positivist's whose
+children have all joined the Salvation Army, and even then but a faint
+idea will be reached of Mrs. Hylton's utter dismay and disgust.
+
+Flossie, though angry, took a different view of Ella's share in the
+business; she knew her better than her mother did, and consequently
+refused to believe that she was a Philistine at heart. It was her absurd
+infatuation for George that made her see with his eyes and bow down
+before the hideous household gods he had chosen to erect. On such
+weakness Flossie had no mercy.
+
+'Well, Ella, dear,' she began, 'mother and I have seen your house.
+George has quite surpassed our wildest expectations. Accept my
+compliments!'
+
+'Flossie,' said her mother severely, 'will you kindly choose some other
+topic? I really feel too seriously annoyed about all this to bear to
+hear it spoken of just yet. I think you shall come with me to the
+Amberleys' garden-party this afternoon, and not Ella, as we are dining
+out this evening. You had better stay at home and rest, Ella.'
+
+In this, and countless other ways, was Ella made to feel that she was in
+disgrace.
+
+Nor did Flossie spare her sister when they were alone. 'Poor dear
+mother!' she said, 'I quite thought that house would have broken her
+heart--oh, I'm not saying a word against it, Ella, I know _you_ like it,
+and I'm sure it looks very comfortable--everything so sensible and
+useful, and the kitchen really charming; mother and I liked it best of
+all the rooms. Such a horrid man let us in; he was at work there, and he
+would follow us all about, and tell mother his entire history. I don't
+think he _could_ have been quite sober, he would insist on turning all
+the taps on everywhere. I suppose, Ella, it's ever so much _cheaper_ to
+furnish as you and George have done; that's the worst of pretty things,
+they do cost such a lot! I'd no idea you were so practical, though,' and
+so on.
+
+On Sunday George came to luncheon. He was delighted to hear from Flossie
+that they had been to the house, and gave a boisterously high-spirited
+account of his labours. 'It _was_ a grind,' he informed them, 'and, as
+for those painter-fellows, I began to think they'd stay out the entire
+lease.'
+
+'Art is long, George,' observed Flossie, wickedly.
+
+'Oh yes, I know; but they promised faithfully to be out in ten days, and
+they were over three weeks!'
+
+'But look at the result! George, how _did_ you find out that Ella liked
+grained doors?'
+
+'Well, to tell you the truth, Flossie, that was a bit of a fluke. The
+man told me that graining was coming in again, and I said, "Grain 'em,
+then"--_I_ didn't know!'
+
+In short, he was more provokingly dense than ever to-day, and Ella found
+herself growing more and more captious and irritable that afternoon; he
+could not understand why she was so disinclined to talk; even the dear
+little house of which she was so soon to be the mistress failed to
+interest her.
+
+'You have told me twice already that you got the drawing-room carpet a
+great bargain, and only paid four pounds ten for the table in the
+dining-room,' she broke out. 'Can't we take that for granted in future?'
+
+'I forgot I'd told you; I thought it was the mater,' he said; 'and I
+say, Ella, how about pictures? Jessie's promised to do us some
+water-colours--she's been taking lessons lately, you know--but we shall
+want one or two prints for the dining-room, shan't we? You can pick them
+up second-hand very cheap.'
+
+'Oh yes, yes; anything you please, George!... No, no; I'm not cross, I'm
+only tired, especially of talking about the house. It is quite finished,
+you know, so what _is_ there to discuss?'
+
+During the days that followed, Flossie devised an ingenious method of
+tormenting Ella; she laid out her pocket-money, of which she had a good
+deal, on the most preposterous ornaments--a pair of dangling cut-glass
+lustres, bead mats, a trophy of wax fruit under a glass shade, gaudy
+fire-screens and flowerpots, all of which she solemnly presented to her
+suffering sister. This was not pure mischief or unkindness on Flossie's
+side, but part of a treatment she had hit upon for curing Ella of her
+folly. And at last the worm turned. Flossie came in one day with a cheap
+plush and terra-cotta panel of appalling ugliness.
+
+'For the drawing-room, dear,' she observed blandly, and Ella suddenly
+burst into a flood of tears.
+
+'You are very, very unkind to me, Flossie!' she sobbed.
+
+'I!' exclaimed Flossie, in a tone of the most innocent surprise. 'Why,
+Ella, I thought you would be charmed with it. I'm sure _George_ will.
+And, you know, it will go beautifully with the rest of your things!'
+
+'You might understand ... you might see----'
+
+'I might see what?'
+
+'How _frightfully_ miserable I am!' said Ella, which was the very
+admission Miss Flossie had been seeking to provoke.
+
+'Suppose I _do_ see,' she said; 'suppose I've been trying to get you to
+act sensibly, Ella?'
+
+'Then it's cruel of you!'
+
+'No it's not. It's kind. How am I to help you unless you speak out? I'm
+younger than you, Ella, but I know this--_I_ would never mope and make
+myself miserable when a word would put everything right!'
+
+'But it wouldn't, Flossie; it is too late to speak now. I can't tell
+him how I really feel--I can't!'
+
+'Ah, then you own there is something to tell?'
+
+'What have I said? Flossie, forget what I said; it slipped out. I meant
+nothing.'
+
+'And you are perfectly happy and satisfied, are you? _Now_, I know how
+people look when they are perfectly happy and satisfied.'
+
+'It's no use!' cried Ella, suddenly. 'I've tried, and tried, and tried
+to bear it, but I can't. I _must_ tell somebody ... it is making me ill.
+I am getting cross and wicked, and unlike what I used to be. Flossie, I
+can't go and live there--I dread the thought of it; I shrink from it
+more and more every day! It is all odious, impossible--and yet I must, I
+must!'
+
+'No, you mustn't; and, what's more, you shan't!'
+
+'Flossie, you mean you will tell mother! You must not, do you hear? If
+you do, it will only make matters worse. Oh, why did I tell you?' cried
+Ella, in shame at this lapse from all her heroism. 'Promise me you will
+say nothing to mother--it is too late now--promise!'
+
+'Very well,' said Flossie reluctantly; 'then I promise. But, all the
+same, Ella, I think you're a great goose!'
+
+'I didn't promise I wouldn't say anything to _George_, though,' she
+reflected; and so, on the very next occasion that she caught him alone,
+she availed herself of an innocent allusion of his to Ella's low
+spirits to give him the benefit of her candid opinion, which was not
+tempered by any marked consideration for his feelings.
+
+Ella was in the morning-room alone--she had taken to sitting alone
+lately, brooding over her trials. She was no heroine, after all; her
+mind, it is to be feared, was far from superior. She was finding out
+that she had undertaken too heavy a task; she could not console herself
+for her lost dream of a charmingly appointed house. She might endure to
+live in such a home as George had made for her; but to be expected to
+admire it, to let it be understood that it was her handiwork, that she
+had chosen or approved of it--this was the burden that was crushing her.
+
+Suddenly the door opened and George stood before her. His expression was
+so altered that she scarcely recognised him; all the cheery buoyancy had
+vanished, and his stern, set face had a dignity and character in it now
+that were wanting before.
+
+'I have just had a talk with Flossie,' he began; 'she has shown me what
+a--what a mistake I've been making.'
+
+Ella could not help feeling a certain relief, though she said, 'It was
+very wrong of Flossie--she had no right to speak.'
+
+'She had every right,' he said. 'She might have done it more kindly,
+perhaps, but that's nothing. Why didn't you tell me yourself, Ella? You
+might have trusted me!'
+
+'I couldn't--it seemed so cruel, so ungrateful, after all you had done.
+I hoped you would never know.'
+
+'It's well for you, and for me too, that I know this while there's still
+time. Ella, I've been a blind, blundering fool. I never had a suspicion
+of this till--till just now, or you don't think I should have gone on
+with it a single minute. I came to tell you that you need not make
+yourself miserable any longer. I will put an end to this--whatever it
+costs me.'
+
+'Oh, George, I am so ashamed. I know it is weak and cowardly of me, but
+I can't help it. And--and will it cost you so very much?'
+
+'Quite as much as I can bear.'
+
+'No; but tell me--about _how_ much? More than a hundred pounds?'
+
+'I haven't worked it out in pounds, shillings, and pence,' he said
+grimly; 'but I should put it higher myself.'
+
+'Won't they take back some of the things? They ought to,' she suggested
+timidly.
+
+'The things? Oh, the furniture! Good Heavens, Ella! do you suppose I
+care a straw about that? All I can think of is how I could have gone on
+deceiving myself like this, believing I knew your every thought; and all
+the time--pah, what a fool I've been!'
+
+'I thought I should get used to it,' she pleaded. 'And oh, you don't
+know how hard I have tried to bear it, not to let anyone see what I
+felt--you don't know!'
+
+'And I would rather not know,' he replied, 'for it's not exactly
+flattering, you see, Ella. And at all events, it's over now. This is the
+last time I shall trouble you; you will see no more of me after to-day.'
+
+Ella could only stare at him incredulously. Had he really taken the
+matter so seriously to heart as this? Could he not forgive the wound to
+his vanity? How hard, how utterly unworthy of him!
+
+'Yes,' he continued, 'I see now we were quite unsuited to one another. I
+should never have made you happy, Ella; it's best to find it out before
+it's too late. So let us shake hands and say good-bye, my dear.'
+
+She felt powerless to appeal to him, and yet it was not wholly pride
+that tied her tongue; she was too shaken and stunned to make the least
+effort at remonstrance.
+
+'Then, if it must be,' she said at last, very low--'good-bye, George.'
+
+He crushed her hand in his strong grasp. 'Don't mind about me,' he said
+roughly. 'You've nothing to blame yourself for. I daresay I shall get
+over it all right. It's rather sudden at first--that's all!' And with
+that he was gone.
+
+Flossie, coming in a little later, found her sister sitting by the
+window, smiling in a strange, vacant way. '_Well?_' said Flossie
+eagerly, for she had been anxiously waiting to hear the result of the
+interview.
+
+'It's all over, Flossie; he has broken it off.'
+
+'Oh, Ella, I'm so glad! I _hoped_ he would, but I wasn't sure. Well,
+you may thank me for delivering you, darling. If I hadn't spoken
+plainly----'
+
+'Tell me what you said.'
+
+'Oh, let me see. Well, I told him anybody else would have seen long ago
+that your feelings were altered. I said you were perfectly miserable at
+having to marry him, only you thought it was too late to say so. I told
+him he didn't understand you in the least, and you hadn't a single
+thought or taste in common. I said if he cared about you at all, the
+best way he could prove it was by setting you free, and not spoiling
+your life and his own too. I put it as pleasantly as I could,' said
+Flossie naïvely, 'but he is very trying!'
+
+'You told him all that! What made you invent such wicked, cruel lies?
+Flossie, it is you that have spoilt our lives, and I will never forgive
+you--never, as long as I live!'
+
+'Ella!' cried the younger sister, utterly astonished at this outburst.
+'Why, didn't you tell me the other day how miserable you were, and how
+you dared not speak about it? And now, when I----'
+
+'Go away, Flossie; you have done mischief enough!'
+
+'Oh, very well, I'm going--if this is all I get for helping you. Is it
+_my_ fault if you don't know your own mind, and say what you don't mean?
+And if you really want your dearly beloved George back again, there's
+time yet; he hasn't gone--he's in the drawing-room with mother.'
+
+How infinitely petty her past misery seemed now! for what trifles she
+had thrown away George's honest heart! If only there was a chance still!
+at least false pride should not come between them any longer: so thought
+Ella on her way to the drawing-room. George was still there; as she
+turned the door-handle she heard her mother's clear resonant tones. 'Not
+that that is any excuse for Ella,' she was saying.
+
+Ella burst precipitately into the room. She was only just in time, for
+George had risen and was evidently on the point of leaving. 'George,'
+she exclaimed, panting after her rapid flight, 'I--I came to tell
+you----'
+
+'My dear Ella,' interrupted Mrs. Hylton, 'the kindest thing you can do
+for George now is to let him go without any more explanations.'
+
+Ella stopped; again her mind became a blank. What had she come for; what
+was it she felt she must say? While she hesitated, George was already at
+the other door; he seemed anxious to avoid hearing her; in another
+second he would be gone.
+
+She cried to him piteously. 'George, dear George, don't leave me!... I
+can't bear it!'
+
+'This is too ridiculous!' exclaimed her mother angrily. 'What is it that
+you _do_ want, Ella?'
+
+'I want George,' she said simply. 'It was all a mistake, George. Flossie
+mistook---- Oh, you don't really think that I have left off caring for
+you? I haven't, dear, indeed I haven't--won't you believe me?'
+
+'I had better leave you to come to an understanding together,' said Mrs.
+Hylton, not in the best of tempers, for she had been more sorry for
+George than for the rupture he came to announce, and she swept out of
+the room with very perceptible annoyance.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+'I thought it was all up with me, Ella; I did indeed,' said George, a
+minute or two later, his face still pale after all this emotion. 'But
+tell me--what's wrong with the furniture I ordered?'
+
+'Nothing, dear, nothing,' she answered, blushing. 'Don't think about it
+any more.'
+
+'No? But your mother was talking about it too,' he insisted. 'Come,
+Ella, dear, for heaven's sake let us have no more misunderstandings! I
+see now what an ass I was not to wait and let you choose for yourself;
+these æsthetic things are not in my line. But I'd no idea you'd care so
+much!'
+
+'But I don't now--a bit.'
+
+'Well, I do, then. And the house must be done all over again, and
+exactly as you would like it; so there's no more to be said about it,'
+said George, without a trace of pique or wounded vanity.
+
+'George, you are too good to me; I don't deserve it. And indeed you must
+not--think of the expense!'
+
+His face lengthened slightly; he knew well enough that the change would
+cost him dear.
+
+'I'll manage it somehow,' he declared stoutly.
+
+Would her mother help them now? thought Ella, and felt more than
+doubtful. No, in spite of her own wishes, she must not allow George to
+carry out his intentions.
+
+'But you forget Carrie and Jessie,' she said; 'we shall hurt their
+feelings so if we change now.'
+
+'By Jove! I forgot that,' he said. 'Yes, they won't like it--they meant
+well, poor girls, and took a lot of trouble. Still, you're the first
+person to be considered, Ella. I'll try and smooth it over with them,
+and if they choose to be offended, why, they must--that's all. And I
+tell you what. Suppose we go and see the house now, and you shall tell
+me just what wants doing to make it right?'
+
+She would have liked to decline this rather invidious office, especially
+as she felt no compromise to be possible; but he was so urgent that she
+finally agreed to go with him.
+
+As they gained Campden Hill and the road in which their house stood,
+George stopped. 'Hullo!' he said, 'that can't be the house--what's the
+matter with it?'
+
+Very soon it was pretty evident what had been the matter--the walls were
+scorched and streaming, the window sashes were empty, charred and wasted
+by fire, the door was blistered and blackened, a stalwart fireman in
+his undress cap, with his helmet slung at his back, was just opening the
+gate as they came up.
+
+'Can't come in, sir,' he said, civilly enough. 'No one admitted.'
+
+'Hang it!' exclaimed George, 'it's my own fire--I'm the tenant.'
+
+'Oh, I beg your pardon, sir--it's been got under some hours now. I was
+just going off duty.'
+
+'Much damage done?' inquired George laconically.
+
+'Well, you see, sir,' said the man, evidently considering how to prepare
+George for the worst, 'we didn't get the call till the house was well
+alight, and there was three steamers and a manual a-playing on it,
+so--well, you must expect things to be a bit untidy-like inside. But the
+walls and the roof ain't much damaged.'
+
+'And how did it happen?--the house isn't even occupied.'
+
+'Workmen,' said the man. 'Someone was in there early this morning and
+left the gas escaping somewheres, and as likely as not a light burning
+near--and here you are. Well, I'll be off, sir; there's nothing more to
+be done 'ere. Good-day, sir, and thank ye, I'm sure.'
+
+'Oh, George!' said Ella, half crying, 'our poor, poor little house! It
+seems like a judgment on me. How _can_ you laugh! Who will build it up
+for us now?'
+
+'Who? Why, the insurance people, to be sure! You see, the firm are
+agents for the "Curfew," and as soon as I got all the furniture in I
+insured the whole concern and got a protection note, so we're all right.
+Don't worry, little girl. Why, don't you see this gets us out of our
+difficulty? We can start afresh now without offending anybody. Look
+there; there's that idiot of a plumber who's done all the mischief--a
+nice funk he'll be in when he sees us!'
+
+But Mr. Peagrum was quite unperturbed; if anything, his smudgy features
+wore a look of sombre complacency as he came towards them. 'I'm sorry
+this should have occurred,' he said,'but you'll bear me out that I
+warned yer as something was bound to 'appen. In course I couldn't tell
+what form it might take, and fire I must say I did _not_ expect. I
+'adn't on'y been in the place not a quarter of a hour, watering the
+gaselier in the libery--the libery as _was_, I _should_ say--when it
+struck me I'd forgot my screw-driver, so, fortunately, as things turned
+out, I went 'ome to my place to get it, and I come back to see the place
+all in a blaze. It's fate, that's what it is--fate's at the bottom o'
+this 'ere job!'
+
+'Much more likely to be a lighted candle,' said George.
+
+'I was not on the premises at the time, so I can't say; but, be that 'ow
+it may, there's no denying it's a singler thing the way my words have
+been fulfilled almost literal.'
+
+'Confound you!' said George. 'You take good care your prophecies come
+off. Why, man, you're not going to pretend you don't know that it's your
+own carelessness that's brought this about! This isn't the only house
+you've brought bad luck into, Mr. What's-your-name, since you've started
+in business!'
+
+'You can't make me lose my temper,' replied the plumber with dignity. 'I
+put it down to ignirance.'
+
+'So do I,' said George. 'And if I know anyone who's anxious for a little
+typhoid, or wants his house burnt down at a moderate charge, why, I
+shall know whom to recommend. Good-day.'
+
+He turned on his heel and walked off, but Ella lingered behind. 'I only
+just wanted to tell you,' she said, addressing the astonished plumber,
+'that you have done us a very great service, and I, at least, am very
+much obliged to you.' And she fluttered away after her _fiancé_.
+
+The plumber--that instrument of Destiny--looked after the retreating
+couple, and indulged in a mystified whistle.
+
+'_'E_ comes a bullyragging of me,' he observed to a lamp-post, 'and
+she's "very much obliged"! And I'm blowed if I know what for, either
+way! Cracked, poor young things, cracked, the pair on 'em--and no
+wonder, with such a calamity so recent. Ah, well, I do 'ope as this is
+the end on it. I 'ope I shan't be the means of bringing no more trouble
+into that little 'ouse--that I kin truly say!'
+
+And--human gratitude having its limits--it is highly probable that this
+pious aspiration will not be disappointed, so long, at least, as Mr. and
+Mrs. Chapman's tenancy continues.
+
+
+
+
+_DON; THE STORY OF A GREEDY DOG_
+
+A TALE FOR CHILDREN
+
+
+'Daisy, dearest,' said Miss Millikin anxiously to her niece one
+afternoon, 'do you think poor Don is quite the thing? He has seemed so
+very languid these last few days, and he is certainly losing his
+figure!'
+
+Daisy was absorbed in a rather ambitious attempt to sketch the lake from
+the open windows of Applethwaite Cottage, and did not look up from her
+drawing immediately. When she did speak her reply might perhaps have
+been more sympathetic. 'He _eats_ such a lot, auntie!' she said. 'Yes,
+Don, we _are_ talking about you. You know you eat too much, and that's
+the reason you're so disgracefully fat!'
+
+Don, who was lying on a rug under the verandah, wagged his tail with an
+uneasy protest, as if he disapproved (as indeed he did) of the very
+personal turn Daisy had given to the conversation. He had noticed
+himself that he was not as active as he used to be; he grew tired so
+very soon now when he chased birds (he was always possessed by a fixed
+idea that, if he only gave his whole mind to it, he could catch any
+swallow that flew at all fairly); he felt the heat considerably.
+
+Still, it was Don's opinion that, so long as he did not mind being fat
+himself, it was no business of any other person's--certainly not of
+Daisy's.
+
+'But, Daisy,' cried Miss Millikin plaintively, 'you don't really mean
+that I overfeed him?'
+
+'Well,' Daisy admitted, 'I think you give way to him rather, Aunt Sophy,
+I really do. I know that at home we never let Fop have anything between
+his meals. Jack says that unless a small dog is kept on very simple diet
+he'll soon get fat, and getting fat,' added Daisy portentously, 'means
+having fits sooner or later.'
+
+'Oh, my _dear_!' exclaimed her aunt, now seriously alarmed. 'What do you
+think I ought to do about it?'
+
+'I know what I would do if he was _my_ dog,' said Daisy, with great
+decision--'diet him, and take no notice when he begs at table; I would.
+I'd begin this very afternoon.'
+
+'_After_ tea, Daisy?' stipulated Miss Millikin.
+
+'No,' was the inflexible answer, '_at_ tea. It's all for his own good.'
+
+'Yes, dear, I'm sure you're right--but he has such pretty ways--I'm so
+afraid I shall forget.'
+
+'I'll remind you, Aunt Sophy. He shan't take advantage of you while
+_I'm_ here.'
+
+'You're just a tiny bit hard on him, Daisy, aren't you?'
+
+'Hard on Don!' cried Daisy, catching him up and holding him out at
+arm's length. 'Don, I'm _not_ hard on you, am I? I love you, only I see
+your faults, and you know it. You're full of deceitfulness' (here she
+kissed him between the eyes and set him down). 'Aunt Sophy, you would
+never have found out his trick about the milk if it hadn't been for
+me--_would_ you now?'
+
+'Perhaps not, my love,' agreed Miss Millikin mildly.
+
+The trick in question was a certain ingenious device of Don's for
+obtaining a double allowance of afternoon tea--a refreshment for which
+he had acquired a strong taste. The tea had once been too hot and burnt
+his tongue, and, as he howled with the pain, milk had been added. Ever
+since that occasion he had been in the habit of lapping up all but a
+spoonful or two of the tea in his saucer, and _then_ uttering a pathetic
+little yelp; whereupon innocent Miss Millikin would as regularly fill up
+the saucer with milk again.
+
+But, unfortunately for Don, his mistress had invited her niece Daisy to
+spend part of her summer holidays at her pretty cottage in the Lake
+District, and Daisy's sharper eyes had detected this little stratagem
+about the milk on the very first evening!
+
+Daisy was fourteen, and I fancy I have noticed that when a girl is about
+this age, she not unfrequently has a tendency to be rather a severe
+disciplinarian when others than herself are concerned. At all events
+Daisy had very decided notions on the proper method of bringing up
+dogs, and children too; only there did not happen to be any children at
+Applethwaite Cottage to try experiments upon; and she was quite sure
+that Aunt Sophy allowed herself to be shamefully imposed upon by Don.
+
+There was perhaps some excuse for Miss Millikin, for Don was a
+particularly charming specimen of the Yorkshire terrier, with a silken
+coat of silver-blue, set off by a head and paws of the ruddiest gold.
+His manners were most insinuating, and his great eyes glowed at times
+under his long hair, as if a wistful, loving little soul were trying to
+speak through them. But, though it seems an unkind thing to say, it must
+be confessed that this same soul in Don's eyes was never quite so
+apparent as when he was begging for some peculiarly appetising morsel.
+He was really fond of his mistress, but at meal times I am afraid he
+'put it on' a little bit. Of course this was not quite straightforward;
+but then I am not holding him up as a model animal.
+
+How far he understood the conversation that has been given above is more
+than I can pretend to say, but from that afternoon he began to be aware
+of a very unsatisfactory alteration in his treatment.
+
+Don had sometimes felt a little out of temper with his mistress for
+being slow to understand exactly what he _did_ want, and he had barked,
+almost sharply, to intimate to the best of his powers--'Not bread and
+butter, stoopid--_cake_!' So you may conceive his disgust when she did
+not even give him bread and butter; nothing but judicious
+advice--_without_ jam. She was most apologetic, it is true, and
+explained amply why she could not indulge him as heretofore, but Don
+wanted sugar, and not sermons. Sometimes she nearly gave way, and then
+cruel Daisy would intercept the dainty under his very nose, which he
+thought most unfeeling.
+
+He had a sort of notion that it was all through Daisy that they were
+just as stingy and selfish in the kitchen, and that his meals were now
+so absurdly few and plain. It was very ungrateful of her, for he had
+gone out of his way to be polite and attentive to her. When he thought
+of her behaviour to him he felt strongly inclined to sulk, but somehow
+he did not actually go so far as that. He liked Daisy; she was pretty
+for one thing, and Don always preferred pretty people, and then she
+stroked him in a very superior and soothing manner. Besides this, he
+respected her: she had been intrusted with the duty of punishing him on
+more than one occasion, and _her_ slaps really hurt, while it was
+hopeless to try to soften her heart by trying to lick the chastising
+hands--a manoeuvre which was always effective with poor Miss Millikin.
+So he contented himself with letting her see that though he did not
+understand her conduct towards him, he was willing to overlook it for
+the present.
+
+'What a wonderful improvement in the dear dog!' Miss Millikin remarked
+one morning at breakfast, after Don had been on short commons for a
+week or two. 'Really, Daisy, I begin to think you were quite right about
+him.'
+
+'Oh, I'm _sure_ I was,' said Daisy, who always had great confidence in
+her own judgment.
+
+'Yes,' continued her aunt, 'and, now he's so much better--just this one
+small bit, Daisy?' Don's eyes already had a green glitter in them and
+his mouth was watering.
+
+'No, Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy, 'I wouldn't--really. He's better without
+anything.'
+
+'I wish that girl was gone!' reflected poor Don, as he went sulkily back
+to his basket. 'It's enough to make a dog steal, upon my tail it is! I'm
+positively starved--no bones, no chicken, only beastly dry dog-biscuits
+and milk twice a day! I wish I could rummage about in gutters and places
+as Jock does--but I don't think the things you find in gutters are ever
+_really_ nice. Jock does--but he's just that low sort of dog who
+_would_!'
+
+Jock was a humble friend of his down in the village, a sort of distant
+relation to the Dandie Dinmonts; he was a rough, long-backed creature,
+as grey as a badger, and with a big solemn head like a hammer. Don was
+civil to him in a patronising way, but he did not tell him of the
+indignities he was subject to, perhaps because he had been rather given
+to boast of his influence over his mistress, and the high consideration
+he enjoyed at Applethwaite Cottage.
+
+Now Daisy used to go up for solitary rambles on the fells sometimes,
+when she generally took Don as a protector. He was becoming very nearly
+as active as ever, and now there was a stronger motive than before for
+pursuing the swallows--for he had a notion that they would be rather
+good eating. But one morning she missed him on her way back through the
+village by the lake; she was sure he was with her on the pier, and she
+had only stopped to ask some question at the ticket-office about the
+steamboat times; and when she turned round, Don was gone.
+
+However, her aunt was neither angry nor alarmed. Miss Millikin was not
+able to walk as much as Don wished, she said, so he was accustomed to
+take a great deal of solitary exercise; he was such a remarkably
+intelligent dog that he could be trusted to take care of himself--oh, he
+would come back.
+
+And towards dusk that evening Don did come back. There was a curious air
+about him--subdued, almost sad; Daisy remembered long afterwards how
+unusually affectionate he had been, and how quietly he had lain on her
+lap till bedtime.
+
+The next morning, when her aunt and she prepared to go for a walk along
+the lake, Don's excitement was more marked than usual; he leaped up and
+tried to caress their hands: he assured them in a thousand ways of the
+delight he felt at being allowed to make one of the party.
+
+After this, it was a painful surprise to find that he gave them the
+slip the moment they reached the village. But Miss Millikin said he
+always did prefer mountain scenery, and no doubt it was tiresome for him
+to have to potter about as they did. And Master Don began to give them
+less and less of his society in the daytime, and to wander from morn to
+dewy eve in solitude and independence; though whether he went up
+mountains to admire the view, or visited ruins and waterfalls, or spent
+his days hunting rabbits, no one at Applethwaite Cottage could even
+pretend to guess.
+
+'_One_ good thing, Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy complacently one evening, a
+little later, 'I've quite cured Don of being troublesome at meals!'
+
+'He couldn't be _troublesome_ if he tried, dear,' said Miss Millikin
+with mild reproof; 'but I must say you have succeeded quite
+wonderfully--how _did_ you do it?'
+
+'Why,' said Daisy, 'I spoke to him exactly as if he could understand
+every word, and I made him thoroughly see that he was only wasting his
+time by sitting up and begging for things. And you got to believe it at
+last, didn't you, dear?' she added to Don, who was lying stretched out
+on the rug.
+
+Don pricked the ear that was uppermost, and then uttered a heavy sigh,
+which smote his mistress to the heart.
+
+'Daisy,' she said, 'it's _no_ use--I _must_ give him something. Poor
+pet, he deserves it for being so good and patient all this time. One
+biscuit, Daisy?'
+
+Even Daisy relented: 'Well--a _very_ plain one, then. Let me give it to
+him, auntie?'
+
+The biscuit was procured, and Daisy, with an express intimation that
+this was a very particular indulgence, tendered it to the deserving
+terrier.
+
+He half raised his head, sniffed at it--and then fell back again with
+another weary little sigh. Daisy felt rather crushed. 'I'm afraid he's
+cross with me,' she said; 'you try, Aunt Sophy.' Aunt Sophy tried, but
+with no better success, though Don wagged his tail feebly to express
+that he was not actuated by any personal feeling in the matter--he had
+no appetite, that was all.
+
+'Daisy,' said Miss Millikin, with something more like anger than she
+generally showed, 'I was very wrong to listen to you about the diet.
+It's perfectly plain to me that by checking Don's appetite as we have we
+have done him serious harm. You can see for yourself that he is past
+eating anything at all now. Cook told me to-day that he had scarcely
+touched his meals lately. And yet he's stouter than ever--_isn't_ he?'
+
+Daisy was forced to allow that this was so. 'But what can it be?' she
+said.
+
+'It's _disease_,' said her aunt, very solemnly. 'I've read over and over
+again that corpulence has nothing whatever to do with the amount of food
+one eats. And, oh! Daisy, I don't want to blame you, dear--but I'm
+afraid we have been depriving him of the nourishing things he really
+needed to enable him to struggle against the complaint!'
+
+Poor Daisy was overcome by remorse as she knelt over the recumbent Don.
+'Oh, darling Don,' she said, 'I didn't mean it--you know I didn't, don't
+you? You must get well and forgive me! I tell you what, aunt,' she said
+as she rose to her feet, 'you know you said I might drive you over in
+the pony cart to that tennis-party at the Netherbys to-morrow. Well,
+young Mr. Netherby is rather a "doggy" sort of man, and nice too.
+Suppose we take Don with us and ask him to tell us plainly whether he
+has anything dreadful the matter with him?'
+
+Miss Millikin consented, though she did not pretend to hope much from
+Mr. Netherby's skill. 'I'm afraid,' she said, with a sigh, 'that only a
+very clever veterinary surgeon would find out what really is the matter
+with Don. But you can try, my dear.'
+
+The following afternoon Miss Millikin entrusted herself and Don to
+Daisy's driving, not without some nervous misgivings.
+
+'You're quite sure you can manage him, Daisy?' she said. 'If not, we can
+take John.'
+
+'Why, Aunt Sophy!' exclaimed Daisy, 'I _always_ drive the children at
+home; and sometimes when I'm on the box with Toppin, he gives me the
+reins in a straight part of the road, and Paul and Virginia pull like
+anything--Toppin says it's all _he_ can do to hold them.'
+
+Daisy was a little hurt at the idea that she might find Aunt Sophy's
+pony too much for her--a sleepy little 'slug of a thing,' as she
+privately called it, which pattered along exactly like a clockwork
+animal in urgent need of winding up.
+
+Don seemed a little better that day, and was lifted into the pony-cart,
+where he lay on the indiarubber mat, sniffing the air as if it was doing
+him good.
+
+Daisy really could drive well for her age, and woke the pony up in a
+manner that astonished her aunt, who remarked from time to time that she
+knew Wildfire wanted to walk now--he never could trot long at a
+time--and so they reached the Netherbys' house, which was five miles
+away towards the head of the lake, well under the hour, a most
+surprising feat--for Wildfire.
+
+It was a grown-up tennis-party, and Daisy, although she had brought her
+racket, was a little afraid to play; besides, she wanted to consult
+young Mr. Netherby about Don, who had been left with the cart in the
+stables.
+
+Mr. Netherby, who was a good-natured, red-faced young soldier, just
+about to join his regiment, was not playing either, so Daisy went up to
+him on the first opportunity.
+
+'You know about dogs, Mr. Netherby, don't you?'
+
+'Rath-er!' said Mr. Netherby, who was a trifle slangy. 'Why? Are you
+thinking of investing in a dog?'
+
+'It's Aunt Sophy's dog,' explained Daisy, 'and he's ill--_very_ ill--and
+we can't make out what's the matter, so I thought you would tell us
+perhaps?'
+
+'I'll ride over to-morrow and have a look at him.'
+
+'Oh, but you needn't--he's here. Wait--I'll fetch him--don't you come,
+please.'
+
+And presently Daisy made her appearance on the lawn, carrying Don, who
+felt quite a weight, in her arms. She set him down before the young man,
+who examined him in a knowing manner, while Miss Millikin, and some
+others who were not playing just then, gathered round. Don was languid,
+but dignified--he rather liked being the subject of so much notice.
+Daisy waited breathlessly for the verdict.
+
+'Well,' said Mr. Netherby, 'it's easy enough to see what's wrong with
+_him_. I should knock off his grub.'
+
+'But,' cried Miss Millikin, 'we _have_ knocked off his grub, as you call
+it. The poor dog is starved--literally starved.'
+
+Mr. Netherby said he should scarcely have supposed so from his
+appearance.
+
+'But I assure you he has eaten nothing--positively nothing--for days and
+days!'
+
+'Ah,' said Mr. Netherby, 'chameleon, is he? then he's had too much
+air--that's all.'
+
+Just then a young lady who had been brought by some friends living close
+by joined the group: 'Why,' she said at once, 'that's the little steamer
+dog. How did he come here?'
+
+'He is _not_ a little steamer dog,' said Miss Millikin in her most
+dignified manner; 'he is _my_ dog.'
+
+'Oh, I didn't know,' said the first speaker; 'but--but I'm sure I've
+seen him on the steamer several times lately.'
+
+'I never use the steamers unless I'm absolutely obliged--I disapprove of
+them: it must have been some other dog.'
+
+The young lady was positive she had made no mistake. 'You so seldom see
+a dog with just those markings,' she said, 'and I don't think anybody
+was with him; he came on board at Amblemere and went all round the lake
+with us.'
+
+'At Amblemere!' cried Daisy, 'that's where _we_ live; and, Aunt Sophy,
+you know Don has been away all day lots of times lately.'
+
+'What did this dog do on the steamer?' asked Miss Millikin faintly.
+
+'Oh, he was so sweet! he went round to everybody, and sat up so prettily
+till they gave him biscuits and things--he was everybody's pet; we were
+all jealous of one another for the honour of feeding him. The second
+time we brought buns on purpose. But we quite thought he belonged to
+the steamer.'
+
+Young Mr. Netherby laughed. 'So _that_ is how he took the air! I thought
+I wasn't far wrong,' he said.
+
+'Put him back in the cart, Daisy,' said Miss Millikin severely; 'I can't
+bear to look at him.'
+
+Don did his best to follow this dialogue, but all he could make out was
+that it was about himself, and that he was being as usual exceedingly
+admired. So he sat and looked as good and innocent and interesting as he
+knew how. Just then he felt that he would almost rather they did _not_
+offer him anything to eat--at least not anything very sweet and rich,
+for he was still not at all well. It was a relief to be back in the cart
+and in peace again, though he wondered why Daisy didn't kiss the top of
+his head as she had done several times in carrying him to the lawn. This
+time she held him at a distance, and said nothing but two words, which
+sounded suspiciously like 'You _pig_!' as she put him down.
+
+Miss Millikin was very grave and silent as they drove home. 'I can't
+trust myself to speak about it, Daisy,' she said; 'if--if it was true,
+it shows such an utter want of principle--such deceit; and Don used to
+be so honest and straightforward! What if we make inquiries at the pier?
+It--it may be all a mistake.'
+
+They stopped for this purpose at Amblemere. 'Ay, Miss Millikin, mum, he
+cooms ahn boord reglar, does that wee dug,' said the old boatman, 'and
+a' makes himsel' rare an' frien'ly, a' do--they coddle him oop fine,
+amang 'em. Eh, but he's a smart little dug, we quite look for him of a
+morning coomin' for his constitutionil, fur arl the worl' like a
+Chreestian!'
+
+'Like a very _greedy_ Christian!' said his disgusted mistress. 'Daisy,'
+she said, when she returned to the pony-cart, 'it's all true! I--I never
+have been so deceived in any one; and the worst of it is, I don't know
+how to punish him, or how to make him feel what a disgraceful trick this
+is. Nobody else's dog I ever heard of made his mistress publicly absurd
+in this way. It's so--so ungrateful!'
+
+'Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy, 'I've an idea. Will you leave him to me, and
+pretend you don't suspect anything? I _will_ cure him this time!'
+
+'You--you won't want to whip him?' said Miss Millikin, 'because, though
+it's all his own doing, he really is not well enough for it just now.'
+
+'No,' said Daisy, 'I won't tell you my plan, auntie, but it's better
+than whipping.'
+
+And all this time the unconscious Don was wearing an expression of
+uncomplaining suffering, and looking meekly sorry for himself, with no
+suspicion in the world that he had been found out.
+
+Next day he felt much better, and as the morning was bright he thought
+that, after all, he might manage another steamer trip; his appetite had
+come back, and his breath was not nearly so short as it had been. He
+was just making modestly for the gate when Daisy stopped him. 'Where are
+you going, sir?' she inquired.
+
+Don rolled over instantly with all his legs in the air and a feeble
+apology in his eye.
+
+'I want you for just one minute first,' said Daisy politely, and carried
+him into the morning-room. Was he going to be whipped?--she couldn't
+have the heart--an invalid like him! He tried to protest by his
+whimpering.
+
+But Daisy did nothing of the kind; she merely took something that was
+flat and broad and white, and fastened it round his neck with a very
+ornamental bow and ribbon. Then she opened the French windows, and said
+in rather a chilly voice, 'Now run away and get on your nasty steamer
+and beg, and see what you get by it!'
+
+That seemed, as far as he could tell, very sensible advice, and, oddly
+enough, it was exactly what he had been intending to do. It did not
+strike him as particularly strange that Daisy should know, because Don
+was a dog that didn't go very deeply into matters unless he was obliged.
+
+He trotted off at an easy pace down to the village, getting hungrier
+every minute, and hoping that the people on the steamer would have
+brought nice things to-day, when, close to the turning that led to the
+landing-stage, he met Jock, and was naturally obliged to stop for a few
+moments' conversation.
+
+He was not at all pleased to see him notwithstanding, for I am sorry to
+say that Don's greediness had so grown upon him of late that he was
+actually afraid that his humble friend (who was a little slow to find
+out when he wasn't wanted) would accompany him on to the steamboat, and
+then of course the good things would have to be divided.
+
+However, Don was a dog that was always scrupulously polite, even to his
+fellow-dogs, and he did not like to be rude now.
+
+'Hullo!' said Jock (in dogs' language of course, but I have reason to
+believe that what follows is as nearly as possible what was actually
+said). 'What's the matter with you this morning?'
+
+Don replied that he was rather out of sorts, and was going down to a
+certain lane for a dose of dog-grass.
+
+'A little dog-grass won't do _me_ any harm,' said Jock; 'I'll come too.'
+
+This was awkward, but Don pretended to be glad, and they went a little
+way together.
+
+'But what's that thing round your neck?' asked the Dandie Dinmont.
+
+'Oh,' said Don, 'that? It's a bit of finery they put on me at the
+cottage. It pleases _them_, you know. Think it's becoming?'
+
+'Um,' answered Jock; 'reminds me of a thing a friend of mine used to
+wear. But _he_ had a blind man tied to him. I don't see _your_ blind
+man.'
+
+'They would have given me a blind man of course if I'd asked for it,'
+said Don airily, 'but what's the use of a blind man--isn't he rather a
+bore?'
+
+'I didn't ask; but my friend said he believed the thing round his neck,
+which was flat and white just like yours (only he had a tin mug
+underneath his), made people more inclined to give him things--he didn't
+know why. Do _you_ find that?'
+
+'How stupid of Daisy to forget the mug!' thought Don. 'I could have
+brought things home to eat quietly then.--I don't know,' he replied to
+Jock; 'I haven't tried.'
+
+He meant to put it to the test very soon, though--if only he could get
+rid of Jock.
+
+'By the way,' he said carelessly, 'have you been round by the hotel
+lately?'
+
+'No,' answered Jock, 'not since the ostler threw a brush at me.'
+
+'Well,' said Don, 'there was a bone outside the porch, which, if I
+hadn't been feeling so poorly, I should have had a good mind to tackle
+myself. But perhaps some other dog has got hold of it by this time.'
+
+'I'll soon make him let go if he has!' said Jock, who liked a fight
+almost as well as a bone. '_Where_ was it, did you say?'
+
+'Outside the hotel. Don't let me keep you. It was a beautiful bone.
+Good-morning,' said Don.
+
+He did not think it worth while to explain that he had seen it several
+days ago, for Don, as you will have remarked already, was a very artful
+dog.
+
+He got rid of his unwelcome friend in this highly unprincipled manner,
+and strolled on to the pier full of expectation. Steamers ply pretty
+frequently on this particular lake, so he had not to wait very long. The
+little _Cygnet_ soon came hissing up, and the moment the gangway was
+placed Don stepped on board, with tail proudly erect.
+
+As usual, he examined the passengers, first to see who had anything to
+give, then who looked most likely to give it to him. Generally he did
+best with children. He was not fond of children (Daisy was quite an
+exception), but he was very fond of cakes, and children, he had
+observed, generally had the best cakes. Don was so accomplished a
+courtier that he would contrive to make every child believe that he or
+she was the only person he loved in the whole world, and he would stay
+by his victim until the cake was all gone, and even a little longer,
+just for the look of the thing, and then move on to some one else and
+begin again.
+
+There were no children with any cakes or buns on board this time,
+however. There was a stout man up by the bows, dividing his attention
+between scenery and sandwiches; but Don knew by experience that
+tourists' sandwiches are always made with mustard, which he hated. There
+were three merry-looking, round-faced young ladies on a centre bench,
+eating Osborne biscuits. He wished they could have made it
+sponge-cakes, because he was rather tired of Osborne biscuits; but they
+were better than nothing. So to these young ladies he went, and, placing
+himself where he could catch all their eyes at once, he sat up in the
+way he had always found irresistible.
+
+I don't suppose any dog ever found his expectations more cruelly
+disappointed. It was not merely that they shook their heads, they went
+into fits of laughter--they were laughing at him! Don was so deeply
+offended that he took himself off at once, and tried an elderly person
+who was munching seed-cake; she did not laugh, but she examined him
+carefully, and then told him with a frown to go away. He began to think
+that Daisy's collar was not a success; he ought to have had a mug, or a
+blind man, or both; he did much better when he was left to himself.
+
+Still he persevered, and went about, wagging his tail and sitting up
+appealingly. By and by he began to have an uncomfortable idea that
+people were saying things about him which were not complimentary. He was
+almost sure he heard the word 'greedy,' and he knew what that meant: he
+had been taught by Daisy. They must be talking of some other dog--not
+him; they couldn't possibly know what he was!
+
+Now Don was undeniably a very intelligent terrier indeed, but there was
+just this defect in his education--he could not read: he had no idea
+what things could be conveyed by innocent-looking little black marks.
+'Of course not,' some of my readers will probably exclaim, 'he was only
+a dog!' But it is not so absurd as it sounds, for one very distinguished
+man has succeeded in teaching his dogs to read and even to spell, though
+I believe they have not got into very advanced books as yet. Still, it
+may happen some day that all but hopelessly backward or stupid dogs will
+be able to read fluently, and then you may find that your own family dog
+has taken this book into his kennel, and firmly declines to give it up
+until he has finished it. At present, thank goodness, we have not come
+to this, and so there is nothing remarkable in the mere fact that Don
+was unable to read. I only mention it because, if he _had_ possessed
+this accomplishment, he would never have fallen into the trap Daisy had
+prepared for him.
+
+For the new collar was, as you perhaps guessed long ago, a card, and
+upon it was written, in Daisy's neatest and plainest round hand:--
+
+
+     I am a very Greedy little Dog, and have Plenty to eat at Home,
+     So please do not give me anything, or I shall have a Fit and die!
+
+
+You can easily imagine that, when this unlucky Don sat up and begged,
+bearing this inscription written legibly on his unconscious little
+chest, the effect was likely to be too much for the gravity of all but
+very stiff and solemn persons.
+
+Nearly everybody on board the steamer was delighted with him; they
+pointed out the joke to one another, and roared with laughter, until he
+grew quite ashamed to sit up any more. Some teased him by pretending to
+give him something, and then eating it themselves; some seemed almost
+sorry for him and petted him; and one, an American, said, 'It was
+playing it too low down to make the little critter give himself away in
+that style!' But nobody quite liked to disobey Daisy's written appeal.
+
+Poor Don could not understand it in the least; he only saw that every
+one was very rude and disrespectful to him, and he tried to get away
+under benches. But it was all in vain; people routed him out from his
+hiding-places to be introduced to each new comer; he could not go
+anywhere without being stared at, and followed, and hemmed in, and
+hearing always that same hateful whisper of 'Greedy dog--not to be given
+anything,' until he felt exactly as if he was being washed!
+
+Poor disappointed greedy dog, how gladly he would have given the tail
+between his legs to be safe at home in the drawing-room with Miss
+Millikin and Daisy! How little he had bargained for such a terrible trip
+as this!
+
+I am sure that if Daisy had ever imagined he would feel his disgrace so
+deeply she would not have had the heart to send him out with that
+tell-tale card around his neck; but then he would not have received a
+very wholesome lesson, and would certainly have eaten himself into a
+serious illness before the summer ended, so perhaps it was all for the
+best.
+
+This time Don did _not_ go the whole round of the lake; he had had
+quite enough of it long before the _Cygnet_ reached Highwood, but he did
+not get a chance until they came to Winderside, and then, watching his
+opportunity, he gave his tormentors the slip at last.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Two hours later, as Daisy and her aunt sat sketching under the big
+holm-oak on the lawn, a dusty little guilty dog stole sneakingly in
+under the garden-gate. It was Don, and he had run all the way from
+Winderside, which, though he did not appreciate it, had done him a vast
+amount of good. 'Oh!' cried Daisy, dropping her paint-brush to clap her
+hands gleefully, 'Look, Aunt Sophy, he has had his lesson already!'
+
+Miss Millikin was inclined to be shocked when she read the ticket. 'It
+was too bad of you, Daisy!' she said; 'I would never have allowed it if
+I had known. Come here, Don, and let me take the horrid thing off.'
+
+'Not yet, please, auntie!' pleaded Daisy, 'I want him to be quite cured,
+and it will take at least till bedtime. Then we'll make it up to him.'
+
+But Don had understood at last. It was this detestable thing, then, that
+had been telling tales of him and spoiling all his fun! Very well, let
+him find himself alone with it--just once! And he went off very soberly
+into the shrubbery, whence in a few minutes came sounds of 'worrying.'
+
+In half an hour Don came out again; his collar was gone, and in his
+mouth he trailed a long piece of chewed ribbon, which he dropped with
+the queerest mixture of penitence and reproach at Daisy's feet. After
+that, of course, it was impossible to do anything but take him into
+favour at once, and he was generous enough to let Daisy see that he bore
+her no malice for the trick she had played him.
+
+What became of the card no one ever discovered; perhaps Don had buried
+it, though Daisy has very strong suspicions that he ate it as his best
+revenge.
+
+But what is more important is that from that day he became a slim and
+reformed dog, refusing firmly to go on board a steamer on any pretence
+whatever, and only consenting to sit up after much coaxing, and as a
+mark of particular condescension.
+
+So that Daisy's experiment, whatever may be thought of it, was at least
+a successful one.
+
+
+
+
+_TAKEN BY SURPRISE_
+
+BEING THE PERSONAL STATEMENT OF BEDELL GRUNCHER, M.A.
+
+
+There are certain misconceptions which a man who is prominently before
+the public is morally bound to combat--more for the sake of others than
+his own--as soon as it becomes probable that the popular estimate of his
+character may be shaken, if not shattered, should he hold his peace.
+Convinced as I am of this, and having some ground to anticipate that the
+next few days may witness a damaging blow to my personal dignity and
+influence for good, I have thought it expedient to publish the true
+history of an episode which, if unexplained, is only too likely to
+prejudice me to a serious extent. Any circumstance that tends to
+undermine or lessen the world's reverence for its instructors is a
+deplorable calamity, to be averted at all hazards, even when this can
+only be effected by disclosures scarcely less painful to a delicate
+mind.
+
+For some years I, Bedell Gruncher, have consecrated my poor talents to
+the guidance and education of public taste in questions of art and
+literature. To do this effectively I have laboured--at the cost of some
+personal inconvenience--to acquire a critical style of light and playful
+badinage. My lash has ever been wreathed in ribbons of rare texture and
+daintiest hues; I have thrown cold water in abundance over the nascent
+flames of young ambition--but such water was systematically tinctured
+with attar of roses. And in time the articles appearing in various
+periodicals above the signature of 'Vitriol' became, I may acknowledge
+without false modesty, so many literary events of the first magnitude. I
+attribute this to my early recognition of the true function of a critic.
+It is not for him to set up sign-posts, or even warning-boards, for
+those who run and read. To attain true distinction he should erect a
+pillory upon his study table, and start the fun himself with a choice
+selection of the literary analogues of the superannuated eggs and futile
+kittens which served as projectiles in the past. The public may be
+trusted to keep it going, and also to retain a grateful recollection of
+the original promoter of the sport. My little weekly and monthly
+pillories became instantly popular, for all my kittens were well aimed,
+and my eggs broke and stuck in a highly entertaining fashion. We are so
+constituted that even the worst of us is capable of a kindly feeling
+towards the benefactor who makes others imperishably ridiculous in our
+eyes; and to do this was my _métier à moi_. At first my identity with
+the lively but terrible 'Vitriol' was kept a profound secret, but
+gradually, by some means which I do not at present remember, it leaked
+out, and I immediately became a social, as well as a literary,
+celebrity. Physically I have been endowed with a presence which, though
+not of unusual height and somewhat inclined to central expansion,
+produces, I find, an invariably imposing effect, especially with members
+of the more emotional and impressionable sex. Consequently I was not
+surprised even at the really extraordinary sensation I inspired upon my
+first introduction to a very charming young lady, Miss Iris Waverley, as
+soon as my _nom de guerre_ was (I forget just now by whom) incidentally
+alluded to. However, as it turned out, she had another and a deeper
+reason for emotion: it seemed she had been engaged to a young poet whose
+verses, to her untaught and girlish judgment, seemed inspired by
+draughts of the true Helicon, and whose rhythmical raptures had stirred
+her maiden heart to its depths.
+
+Well, that young poet's latest volume of verse came under my notice for
+review, and in my customary light-hearted fashion I held it up to
+general derision for a column or two, and then dismissed it, with an
+ineffaceable epigrammatic kick, to spin for ever (approximately) down
+the ringing grooves of criticism.
+
+Miss Waverley, it happened, was inclined to correct her own views by the
+opinions of others, and was, moreover, exceptionally sensitive to any
+association of ridicule with the objects of her attachment--indeed, she
+once despatched a dog she fondly loved to the lethal chamber at
+Battersea, merely because all the hair had come off the poor animal's
+tail! My trenchant sarcasms had depoetised her lover in a similar
+fashion; their livid lightning had revealed the baldness, the glaring
+absurdity of the very stanzas which once had filled her eyes with
+delicious tears; he was dismissed, and soon disappeared altogether from
+the circles which I had (in perfect innocence) rendered impossible to
+him.
+
+Notwithstanding this, Miss Waverley's first sentiments towards me were
+scarcely, oddly enough, of unmixed gratitude. I represented the rod, and
+a very commendable feeling of propriety made her unwilling to kiss me on
+a first interview, though, as our intimacy advanced--well, there are
+subjects on which I claim the privilege of a manly reticence.
+
+I hasten over, then, the intermediate stages of antipathy, fear,
+respect, interest, and adoration. In me she recognised an intellect
+naturally superior, too indifferent and unambitious to give life to its
+own imaginings--too honest, too devoted to humanity, to withhold merited
+condemnation from those of others. I was the radiant sun whose scorching
+beams melted the wax from the pinions of many a modern Icarus; or, to
+put the metaphor less ingeniously, the shining light in which, by an
+irresistible impulse of self-destruction, the poetical and artistic
+moths flew and incontinently frizzled.
+
+One trait in my character which Iris valued above all others was the
+caution with which I habitually avoided all associations of a ridiculous
+nature; for it was my pride to preserve a demeanour of unsullied dignity
+under circumstances which would have been trying, if not fatal, to an
+ordinary person. So we became engaged; and if, pecuniarily speaking, the
+advantage of the union inclined to my side, I cannot consider that I was
+the party most benefited by the transaction.
+
+It was soon after this happy event that Iris entreated from me, as a
+gift, a photograph of myself. I could not help being struck by this
+instance of feminine parsimony with regard to small disbursements,
+since, for the trifling sum of one shilling, it was perfectly open to
+her to procure an admirable presentment of me at almost any stationer's;
+for, in obedience to a widely expressed demand, I had already more than
+once undergone the ordeal by camera.
+
+But no; she professed to desire a portrait more peculiarly her own--one
+that should mark the precise epoch of our mutual happiness--a caprice
+which reminded me of the Salvation Army recruit who was photographed, by
+desire, 'before and after conversion'; and I demurred a little, until
+Iris insisted with such captivating pertinacity that--although my
+personal expenses (always slightly in excess of my income) had been
+further swelled since my engagement by the innumerable _petits soins_
+expected by an absurd custom from every lover--I gave way at length.
+
+It was her desire that my portrait should form a pendant to one of
+herself which had been recently taken by a fashionable photographer, and
+I promised to see that this wish should be gratified. It is possible
+that she expected me to resort to the same artist; but there were
+considerations which induced me to avoid this, if I could. To the extent
+of a guinea (or even thirty shillings) I could refuse her nothing; but
+every one knows what sums are demanded by a photographer who is at all
+in vogue. I might, to be sure, as a public character, have sat without
+being called upon for any consideration, beyond the right to dispose of
+copies of my photograph; but I felt that Iris would be a little hurt if
+I took this course, and none of the West-end people whom I consulted in
+the matter quite saw their way to such an arrangement just then. There
+was a temporary lull, they assured me, in the demand for likenesses of
+our leading literary men, and I myself had been photographed within too
+recent a period to form any exception to the rule.
+
+So, keeping my promise constantly in mind, I never entered a secluded
+neighbourhood without being on the look-out for some unpretending
+photographic studio which would combine artistic excellence with
+moderate charges.
+
+And at last I discovered this photographic phoenix, whose nest, if I
+may so term it, was in a retired suburb which I do not care to
+particularise. Upon the street level was a handsome plate-glass window,
+in which, against a background of dark purple hangings and potted ferns,
+were displayed cartes, cabinets, and groups, in which not even my
+trained faculties could detect the least inferiority to the more costly
+productions of the West-end, while the list of prices that hung by the
+door was conceived in a spirit of exemplary modesty. After a brief
+period of hesitation I stepped inside, and, on stating my wish to be
+photographed at once, was invited by a very civil youth with a slight
+cast in his eye to walk upstairs, which I accordingly did.
+
+I mounted flight after flight of stairs, till I eventually found myself
+at the top of the house, in an apartment pervaded by a strong odour of
+chemicals, and glazed along the roof and the whole of one side with
+panes of a bluish tint. It was empty at the moment of my entrance, but,
+after a few minutes, the photographer burst impetuously in--a tall young
+man, with long hair and pale eyes, whose appearance denoted a nervous
+and high-strung temperament. Perceiving him to be slightly overawed by a
+certain unconscious dignity in my bearing, which frequently does produce
+that effect upon strangers, I hastened to reassure him by discriminating
+eulogies upon the specimens of his art that I had been inspecting
+below, and I saw at once that he was readily susceptible to flattery.
+
+'You will find me,' I told him frankly, 'a little more difficult to
+satisfy than your ordinary _clientèle_; but, on the other hand, I am
+peculiarly capable of appreciating really good work. Now I was struck at
+once by the delicacy of tone, the nice discrimination of values, the
+atmosphere, gradation, feeling, and surface of the examples displayed in
+your window.'
+
+He bowed almost to the ground; but, having taken careful note of his
+prices, I felt secure in commending him, even to the verge of
+extravagance; and, besides, does not the artistic nature demand the
+stimulus of praise to enable it to put forth its full powers?
+
+He inquired in what style I wished to be taken, whether full-length,
+half-length, or vignette. 'I will answer you as concisely as possible,'
+I said. 'I have been pressed, by one whose least preference is a law to
+me, to have a photograph of myself executed which shall form a
+counterpart or pendant, as it were, to her own. I have, therefore, taken
+the precaution to bring her portrait with me for your guidance. You will
+observe it is the work of a firm in my opinion greatly
+overrated--Messrs. Lenz, Kamerer, & Co.; and, while you will follow it
+in style and the disposition of the accessories, you will, I make no
+doubt, produce, if you take ordinary pains, a picture vastly superior in
+artistic merit.'
+
+This, as will be perceived, was skilfully designed to put him on his
+mettle, and rouse a useful spirit of emulation. He took the portrait of
+Iris from my hands and carried it to the light, where he examined it
+gravely in silence.
+
+'I presume,' he said at length, 'that I need hardly tell you I cannot
+pledge myself to produce a result as pleasing as this--under the
+circumstances?'
+
+'That,' I replied, 'rests entirely with you. If you overcome your
+natural diffidence, and do yourself full justice, _I_ see no reason why
+you should not obtain something even more satisfactory.'
+
+My encouragement almost unmanned him. He turned abruptly away and blew
+his nose violently with a coloured silk handkerchief.
+
+'Come, come,' I said, smiling kindly, 'you see I have every confidence
+in you--let us begin. I don't know, by the way,' I added, with a sudden
+afterthought, 'whether in your leisure moments you take any interest in
+contemporary literature?'
+
+'I--I have done so in my time,' he admitted; 'not very lately.'
+
+'Then,' I continued, watching his countenance with secret amusement for
+the spasm I find this announcement invariably produces upon persons of
+any education, 'it may possibly call up some associations in your mind
+if I tell you that I am perhaps better known by my self-conferred
+_sobriquet_ of "Vitriol."'
+
+Evidently I had to do with a man of some intelligence--I obtained an
+even more electrical effect than usual. '"_Vitriol!_"' he cried, '_not_
+surely Vitriol, the great critic?'
+
+'The same,' I said carelessly. 'I thought I had better mention it.'
+
+'You did well,' he rejoined, 'very well! Pardon my emotion--may I wring
+that hand?'
+
+It is not my practice to shake hands with a photographer, but I was
+touched and gratified by his boyish enthusiasm, and he seemed a
+gentlemanly young fellow too, so I made an exception in his favour; and
+he did wring my hand--hard.
+
+'So you are Vitriol?' he repeated in a kind of daze, 'and you have
+sought me out--_me_, of all people in the world--to have the honour of
+taking your photograph!'
+
+'That is so,' I said, 'but pardon me if I warn you that you must not
+allow your head to be turned by what is, in truth, due to the merest
+accident.'
+
+'But what an accident!' he cried; 'after what I have learnt I really
+could not think of making any charge for this privilege!'
+
+That was a creditable and not unnatural impulse, and I did not check it.
+'You shall take me as often as you please,' I said, 'and for nothing.'
+
+'And may I,' he said, a little timidly--'would you give me permission to
+exhibit the results?'
+
+'If I followed my own inclinations,' I replied, 'I should answer
+"certainly not." But perhaps I have no right to deprive you of the
+advertisement, and still less to withhold my unworthy features from
+public comment. I may, for private reasons,' I added, thinking of Iris,
+'find it advisable to make some show of displeasure, but you need not
+fear my taking any proceedings to restrain you.'
+
+'We struggling photographers must be so careful,' he sighed. 'Suppose
+the case of your lamented demise--it would be a protection if I had some
+written authority under your hand to show your legal representatives.'
+
+'_Actio personalis moritur cum personâ_,' I replied; 'if my executors
+brought an action, they would find themselves non-suited.' (I had
+studied for the Bar at one period of my life.)
+
+'Quite so,' he said, 'but they might drag me into court, nevertheless. I
+should really prefer to be on the safe side.'
+
+It did not seem unreasonable, particularly as I had not the remotest
+intention either of bringing an action or dying; so I wrote him a hasty
+memorandum to the effect that, in consideration of his photographing me
+free of charge (I took care to put _that_ in), I undertook to hold him
+free from all molestation or hindrance whatever in respect of the sale
+and circulation of all copies resulting from such photographing as
+aforesaid.
+
+'Will that do?' I said as I handed it to him.
+
+His eyes gleamed as he took the document. 'It is just what I wanted,'
+he said gratefully; 'and now, if you will excuse me, I will go and bring
+in a few accessories, and then we will get to work.'
+
+He withdrew in a state of positive exultation, leaving me to
+congratulate myself upon the happy chance which had led me to his door.
+One does not discover a true artist every day, capable of approaching
+his task in a proper spirit of reverence and enthusiasm; and I had
+hardly expected, after my previous failures, to be spared all personal
+outlay. My sole regret, indeed, was that I had not stipulated for a
+share in the profits arising from the sale--which would be doubtless a
+large one; but meanness is not one of my vices, and I decided not to
+press this point.
+
+Presently he returned with something which bulged inside his velvet
+jacket, and a heap of things which he threw down in a corner behind a
+screen.
+
+'A few little properties,' he said; 'we may be able to introduce them
+by-and-by.'
+
+Then he went to the door and, with a rapid action, turned the key and
+placed it in his pocket.
+
+'You will hardly believe,' he explained, 'how nervous I am on occasions
+of importance like this; the bare possibility of interruption would
+render me quite incapable of doing myself justice.'
+
+I had never met any photographer quite so sensitive as that before, and
+I began to be uneasy about his success; but I know what the artistic
+temperament is, and, as he said, this was not like an ordinary
+occasion.
+
+'Before I proceed to business,' he said, in a voice that positively
+trembled, 'I must tell you what an exceptional claim you have to my
+undying gratitude. Amongst the many productions which you have visited
+with your salutary satire you may possibly recall a little volume of
+poems entitled "Pants of Passion"?'
+
+I shook my head good-humouredly. 'My good friend,' I told him, 'if I
+burdened my memory with all the stuff I have to pronounce sentence upon,
+do you suppose my brain would be what it is?'
+
+He looked crestfallen. 'No,' he said slowly, 'I ought to have known--you
+would not remember, of course. But _I_ do. I brought out those Pants.
+Your mordant pen tore them to tatters. You convinced me that I had
+mistaken my career, and, thanks to your monitions, I ceased to practise
+as a Poet, and became the Photographer you now behold!'
+
+'And I have known poets,' I said encouragingly, 'who have ended far less
+creditably. For even an indifferent photographer is in closer harmony
+with nature than a mediocre poet.'
+
+'And I _was_ mediocre, wasn't I?' he inquired humbly.
+
+'So far as I recollect,' I replied (for I did begin to remember him
+now), 'to attribute mediocrity to you would have been beyond the
+audacity of the grossest sycophant.'
+
+'Thank you,' he said; 'you little know how you encourage me in my
+present undertaking--for you will admit that I can _photograph_?'
+
+'That,' I replied, 'is intelligible enough, photography being a pursuit
+demanding less mental ability in its votaries than that of metrical
+composition, however halting.'
+
+'There is something very soothing about your conversation,' he remarked;
+'it heals my self-love--which really was wounded by the things you
+wrote.'
+
+'Pooh, pooh!' I said indulgently, 'we must all of us go through that in
+our time--at least all of _you_ must go through it.'
+
+'Yes,' he admitted sadly, 'but it ain't pleasant, is it?'
+
+'Of that I have never been in a position to judge,' said I; 'but you
+must remember that your sufferings, though doubtless painful to
+yourself, are the cause, under capable treatment, of infinite pleasure
+and amusement to others. Try to look at the thing without egotism. Shall
+I seat myself on that chair I see over there?'
+
+He was eyeing me in a curious manner. 'Allow me,' he said; 'I always
+pose my sitters myself.' With that he seized me by the neck and
+elsewhere without the slightest warning, and, carrying me to the further
+end of the studio, flung me carelessly, face downwards, over the
+cane-bottomed chair to which I had referred. He was a strong athletic
+young man, in spite of his long hair--or might that have been, as in
+Samson's case, a contributory cause? I was like an infant in his hands,
+and lay across the chair, in an exceedingly uncomfortable position,
+gasping for breath.
+
+'Try to keep as limp as you can, please,' he said, 'the mouth wide open,
+as you have it now, the legs careless--in fact, trailing. Beautiful!
+don't move.'
+
+And he went to the camera. I succeeded in partly twisting my head round.
+'Are you _mad_?' I cried indignantly; 'do you really suppose I shall
+consent to go down to posterity in such a position as this?'
+
+I heard a click, and, to my unspeakable horror, saw that he was
+deliberately covering me from behind the camera with a revolver--_that_
+was what I had seen bulging inside his pocket.
+
+'I should be sorry to slay any sitter in cold blood,' he said, 'but I
+must tell you solemnly, that unless you instantly resume your original
+pose--which was charming--you are a dead man!'
+
+Not till then did I realise the awful truth--I was locked up alone, at
+the top of a house, in a quiet neighbourhood, with a mad photographer!
+Summoning to my aid all my presence of mind, I resumed the original pose
+for the space of forty-five hours--they were seconds really, but they
+_seemed_ hours; it was not needful for him to exhort me to be limp
+again--I was limper than the dampest towel!
+
+'Thank you very much,' he said gravely as he covered the lens; 'I think
+that will come out very well indeed. You may move now.'
+
+I rose, puffing, but perfectly collected. 'Ha-ha,' I laughed in a sickly
+manner (for I _felt_ sick), 'I--I perceive, sir, that you are a
+humorist.'
+
+'Since I have abandoned poetry,' he said as he carefully removed the
+negative to a dark place, 'I have developed a considerable sense of
+quiet humour. You will find a large Gainsborough hat in that
+corner--might I trouble you to put it on for the next sitting?'
+
+'Never!' I cried, thoroughly revolted. 'Surely, with your rare artistic
+perception, you must be aware that such a headdress as that (which is no
+longer worn even by females) is out of all keeping with my physiognomy.
+I will _not_ sit for my photograph in such a preposterous thing!'
+
+'I shall count ten very slowly,' he replied pensively, 'and if by the
+time I have finished you are not seated on the back of that chair, your
+feet crossed so as to overlap, your right thumb in the corner of your
+mouth, a pleasant smile on your countenance, _and_ the Gainsborough hat
+on your head, you will need no more hats on this sorrowful earth.
+One--two----'
+
+I was perched on that chair in the prescribed attitude long before he
+had got to seven! How can I describe what it cost me to smile, as I sat
+there under the dry blue light, the perspiration rolling in beads down
+my cheeks, exposed to the gleaming muzzle of the revolver, and the
+steady Gorgon glare of that infernal camera?
+
+'That will be extremely popular,' he said, lowering the weapon as he
+concluded. 'Your smile, perhaps, was a _little_ too broad, but the pose
+was very fresh and unstudied.'
+
+I have always read of the controlling power of the human eye upon wild
+beasts and dangerous maniacs, and I fixed mine firmly upon him now as I
+said sternly, 'Let me out at once--I wish to go.'
+
+Perhaps I did not fix them quite long enough; perhaps the power of the
+human eye has been exaggerated: I only know that for all the effect mine
+had on him they might have been oysters.
+
+'Not yet,' he said persuasively, 'not when we're getting on so nicely. I
+may never be able to take you under such favourable conditions again.'
+
+That, I thought, I could undertake to answer for; but who, alas! could
+say whether I should ever leave that studio alive? For all I knew, he
+might spend the whole day in photographing me, and then, with a madman's
+caprice, shoot me as soon as it became too dark to go on any longer! The
+proper course to take, I knew, was to humour him, to keep him in a good
+temper, fool him to the top of his bent--it was my only chance.
+
+'Well,' I said, 'perhaps you're right. I--I'm in no great hurry. Were
+you thinking of taking me in some different style? I am quite at your
+disposition.'
+
+He brought out a small but stout property-mast, and arranged it against
+a canvas background of coast scenery. 'I generally use it for children
+in sailor costume,' he said, 'but I _think_ it will bear your weight
+long enough for the purpose.'
+
+I wiped my brow. 'You are not going to ask me to climb that thing?' I
+faltered.
+
+'Well,' he suggested, 'if you will just arrange yourself upon the
+cross-trees in a negligent attitude, upside down, with your tongue
+protruded as if for medical inspection, I shall be perfectly satisfied.'
+
+I tried argument. 'I should have no objection in the world,' I said;
+'it's an excellent idea--only, _do_ sailors ever climb masts in that
+way? Wouldn't it be better to have the thing correct while we're about
+it?'
+
+'I was not aware that you were a sailor,' he said; '_are_ you?'
+
+I was afraid to say I was, because I apprehended that, if I did, it
+might occur to him to put me through some still more frightful
+performance.
+
+'Come,' he said, 'you won't compel me to shed blood so early in the
+afternoon, will you? Up with you.'
+
+I got up, but, as I hung there, I tried to obtain a modification of
+some of the details. 'I don't think,' I said artfully, 'that I'll put
+out my tongue--it's rather overdone, eh? _Everybody_ is taken with his
+tongue out nowadays.'
+
+'It is true,' he said, 'but I am not well enough known in the profession
+yet to depart entirely from the conventional. Your tongue out as far as
+it will go, please.'
+
+'I shall have a rush of blood to the head, I know I shall,' I protested.
+
+'Look here,' he said; 'am I taking this photograph, or are you?'
+
+There was no possible doubt, unfortunately, as to who was taking the
+photograph. I made one last remonstrance. 'I put it to you as a sensible
+man,' I began; but it is a waste of time to put anything to a raving
+lunatic as a sensible man. It is enough to say that he carried his
+point.
+
+'I wish you could see the negative!' he said as he came back from his
+laboratory. 'You were a little red in the face, but it will come out
+black, so it's all right. That carte will be quite a novelty, I flatter
+myself.'
+
+I groaned. However, this was the end; I would get away now at all
+hazards, and tell the police that there was a dangerous maniac at large.
+I got down from the mast with affected briskness. 'Well,' I said, 'I
+mustn't take advantage of your good nature any longer. I'm exceedingly
+obliged to you for the--the pains you have taken. You will send _all_
+the photographs to this address, please?'
+
+'Don't go yet,' he said. 'Are you an equestrian, by the way?'
+
+If I could only engage him in conversation I felt comparatively secure.
+
+'Oh, I put in an appearance in the Row sometimes, in the season,' I
+replied; 'and, while I think of it,' I added, with what I thought at the
+time was an inspiration, 'if you will come with me now, I'll show you my
+horse--you might take me on horseback, eh?' I did not possess any such
+animal, but I wanted to have that door unlocked.
+
+'Take you on horseback?' he repeated. 'That's a good idea--I had rather
+thought of that myself.'
+
+'Then come along and bring your instrument,' I said, 'and you can take
+me at the stables; they're close by.'
+
+'No need for that,' he replied cheerfully. 'I'll find you a mount here.'
+
+And the wretched lunatic went behind the screen and wheeled out a small
+wooden quadruped covered with large round spots!
+
+'She's a strawberry roan,' he said; 'observe the strawberries. So, my
+beauty, quiet, then! Now settle yourself easily in the saddle, as if you
+were in the Row, with your face to the tail.'
+
+'Listen to me for one moment,' I entreated tremulously. 'I assure you
+that I am not in the habit of appearing in Rotten Row on a spotted
+wooden horse, nor does any one, I assure you--_any_ one mount a horse of
+any description with his face towards the crupper! If you take me like
+that, you will betray your ignorance--you will be laughed at!'
+
+When people tell you it is possible to hoodwink the insane by any
+specious show of argument, don't believe them; my own experience is that
+demented persons can be quite perversely logical when it suits their
+purpose.
+
+'Pardon me,' he said, '_you_ will be laughed at possibly--not I. I
+cannot be held responsible for the caprices of my clients. Mount,
+please; she'll carry you perfectly.'
+
+'I will,' I said, 'if you'll give me the revolver to hold. I--I should
+like to be done with a revolver.'
+
+'I shall be delighted to do you with a revolver,' he said grimly, 'but
+not yet; and if I lent you the weapon now, I could not answer for your
+being able to hold the horse as well--she has never been broken in to
+firearms. _I'll_ hold the revolver. One--two--three.'
+
+I mounted; why had I not disregarded the expense and gone to Lenz and
+Kamerer? Lenz does not pose his customers by the aid of a revolver.
+Kamerer, I was sure, would not put his patrons through these degrading
+tomfooleries.
+
+He took more trouble over this than any of the others; I was
+photographed from the back, in front, and in profile; and if I escaped
+being made to appear abjectly ridiculous, it can only be owing to the
+tragic earnestness which the consciousness of my awful situation lent to
+my expression.
+
+As he took the last I rolled off the horse, completely prostrated. 'I
+think,' I gasped faintly, 'I would rather be shot at once--_without_
+waiting to be taken in any other positions. I really am not equal to any
+more of this!' (He was quite capable, I felt, of photographing me in a
+perambulator, if it once occurred to him!)
+
+'Compose yourself,' he said soothingly, 'I have obtained all I wanted. I
+shall not detain you much longer. Your life, I may remark, was never in
+any imminent danger, as this revolver is unloaded. I have now only to
+thank you for the readiness with which you have afforded me your
+co-operation, and to assure you that early copies of each of the
+photographs shall be forwarded for Miss Waverley's inspection.'
+
+'Miss Waverley!' I exclaimed; 'stay, how do _you_ know that name?'
+
+'If I mistake not, it was her photograph that you kindly brought for my
+guidance. I ought to have mentioned, perhaps, that I once had the honour
+of being engaged to her--until you (no doubt from the highest motives)
+invested my little gift of song with a flavour of unromantic ridicule.
+That ridicule I am now enabled to repay, with interest calculated up to
+the present date.'
+
+'So you are Iris's poet!' I burst out, for, somehow, I had not
+completely identified him till that moment. 'You scoundrel! do you think
+I shall allow you to circulate those atrocious caricatures with
+impunity? No, by heavens! my solicitor shall----'
+
+'I rely upon the document you were kind enough to furnish,' he said
+quietly. 'I fear that any legal proceedings you may resort to will
+hardly avert the publicity you seem to fear. Allow me to unfasten the
+door. Good-bye; mind the step on the first landing. Might I beg you to
+recommend me amongst your friends?'
+
+I went out without another word; he was mad, of course, or he would not
+have devised so outrageous a revenge for a fancied injury, but he was
+cunning enough to be my match. I knew too well that if I took any legal
+measures, he would contrive to shift the whole burden of lunacy upon
+_me_. I dared not court an inquiry for many reasons, and so I was
+compelled to pass over this unparalleled outrage in silence.
+
+Iris made frequent inquiries after the promised photograph, and I had to
+parry them as well as I could--which was a mistake in judgment on my
+part, for one afternoon while I was actually sitting with her, a packet
+arrived addressed to Miss Waverley.
+
+I did not suspect what it might contain until it was too late. She
+recognised that photographs were inside the wrappings, which she tore
+open with a cry of rapture--and then!
+
+She had a short fainting fit when she saw the Gainsborough hat, and as
+soon as she revived, the extraordinary appearance I presented upside
+down on the mast sent her into violent hysterics. By the time she was in
+a condition to look at the equestrian portraits she had grown cold and
+hard as marble. 'Go,' she said, indicating the door, 'I see I have been
+wasting my affection upon a vulgar and heartless buffoon!'
+
+I went--for she would listen to no explanations; and indeed I doubt
+whether, even were she to come upon this statement, it would serve to
+restore my tarnished ideal in her estimation. But, though I have lost
+her, I am naturally anxious (as I said when I began) that the public
+should not be misled into drawing harsh conclusions from what, if left
+unexplained, may doubtless have a singular appearance.
+
+It is true that, up to the present, I have not been able to learn that
+any of those fatal portraits have absolutely been exposed for sale,
+though I direct my trembling steps almost every day to Regent Street,
+and search the windows of the Stereoscopic Company with furtive and
+foreboding eyes, dreading to be confronted with presentments of
+myself--Bedell Gruncher, 'Vitriol,' the great critic!--lying across a
+chair in a state of collapse, sucking my thumb in a Gainsborough hat,
+or bestriding a ridiculous wooden horse with my face towards its tail!
+
+But they cannot be long in coming out now; and my one hope is that these
+lines may appear in print in time to forestall the prejudice and scandal
+which are otherwise inevitable. At all events, now that the world is in
+possession of the real facts, I am entitled to hope that the treatment
+to which I have been subjected will excite the indignation and sympathy
+it deserves.
+
+
+
+
+_PALEFACE AND REDSKIN_
+
+A COMEDY-STORY FOR GIRLS AND BOYS
+
+
+
+
+ACT THE FIRST
+
+WHERE IS THE ENEMY?
+
+
+It was a very hot afternoon, and Hazel, Hilary, and Cecily Jolliffe were
+sitting under the big cedar on the lawn at The Gables. Each had her
+racket by her side, and the tennis-court lay, smooth and inviting, close
+by; but they did not seem inclined to play just then, and there was
+something in the expression of all three which indicated a common
+grievance.
+
+'Well,' said Hazel, the eldest, who was nearly fourteen, 'we need not
+have excited ourselves about the boys' holidays, if we had only known.
+They don't give us much of their society--why, we haven't had one single
+game of cricket together yet!'
+
+'And then to have the impudence to tell us that they didn't care much
+about _our_ sort of cricket!' said Hilary, 'when I can throw up every
+bit as far as Jack, and it takes Guy three overs to bowl me! It's
+beastly cheek of them.'
+
+'_Hilary!_' cried Cecily, 'what would mother say if she heard you talk
+like that?'
+
+'Oh, it's the holidays!' said Hilary, lazily. 'Besides, it is a shame!
+They would have played with us just as they used to, if it hadn't been
+for that Clarence Tinling.'
+
+'Yes,' Hazel agreed, 'he hates cricket. I do believe that's the reason
+why he invented this silly army, and talked Jack and Guy into giving up
+everything for it.'
+
+'They haven't any will of their own, poor things!' said Hilary.
+
+'You forget, Hilary,' put in Cecily, 'Tinling is the guest. They ought
+to give way to him.'
+
+'Well,' said Hilary, 'it's ridiculous for great boys who have been two
+terms at school to go marching about with swords and guns. Big babies!'
+
+Perhaps there was a little personal feeling at the bottom of this, for
+she had offered herself for enlistment, and had been sternly rejected on
+the ground of her sex.
+
+'I wish he would go, I know that,' said Hazel, making a rather vicious
+little chop at her shoe with her racket; 'those boys talk about nothing
+but their stupid army from morning to night. Uncle Lambert says they
+make him feel quite gunpowdery at lunch. And what do you think is the
+last thing they've done?--put up a great fence all round their tent, and
+shut themselves up there all day!'
+
+'Except when they're sentries and hide,' put in Hilary; 'they're always
+jumping up somewhere and wanting you to give the countersign. It isn't
+like home, these holidays!'
+
+'Perhaps,' suggested Cecily, 'it makes things safer, you know.'
+
+'Duffer, Cis!' cried Hilary, contemptuously, for Cecily had appointed
+herself professional peacemaker to the family, and her efforts were
+about as successful as such domestic offices ever are.
+
+'Look out!' cried Hilary, presently; 'they're coming. Don't let's take
+the least notice of them. They hate that more than anything.'
+
+From the shrubbery filed three boys, the first and tallest of whom wore
+an imposing dragoon's helmet with a crimson plume, and carried a
+sabretache and crossbelts, and wore red caps like those of the French
+army; they carried guns on their shoulders.
+
+'Halt! 'Tention! Dis-miss!' shouted the commanding officer, and the army
+broke off with admirable precision.
+
+'Don't be alarmed,' said the General considerately to the three girls;
+'the army is only out on fatigue duty.'
+
+'Then wouldn't the army like to sit down?' suggested Hilary, forgetting
+all about her recent proposal.
+
+'Ah, you don't understand,' said General Tinling with some pity. 'It's
+a military term.'
+
+He was a pale, puffy boy, with reddish hair and freckles, who was
+evidently fully alive to the dignity of his position.
+
+'Suppose we let military things alone for a little while,' said Hazel.
+'We want the army to come and play tennis. You will, won't you, Jack and
+Guy? and Cis will umpire--she likes it.'
+
+'I don't mind a game,' said Jack.
+
+'I'll play, if you like,' added Guy; but he had forgotten that the
+General was a bit of a martinet.
+
+'That's nice discipline,' he said. 'I don't know whether you know it;
+but in some armies you'd be court-martialled for less than that.'
+
+'Well, may we, then?' asked Guy a little impatiently.
+
+'No salute now!' cried his superior. 'I shall never make you fellows
+smart. Why, at the Haversacks, last Easter, there were half a dozen of
+us, and we drilled like machines. Of course you mayn't play tennis--this
+is only a bivouac; and it's over now. Attention! The left wing of the
+force will occupy the shrubbery; the right will push on and blow up the
+gate.
+
+'Which of us is the left wing?' inquired Guy.
+
+'You are, of course.'
+
+'Oh, all right; only you said Jack was just now,' grumbled Guy, who was
+evidently a little disposed to rebel at being deprived of his tennis.
+
+'Look here,' said the General; 'either let's do the thing thoroughly, or
+not do it at all. It's no pleasure to _me_ to be General, I can tell
+you; and if I can't have perfect discipline in the ranks--why, we might
+as well drop the army altogether!'
+
+'Oh, all right,' said Jack, who was a sweet-tempered boy, 'we won't do
+it again.'
+
+And they went off to carry out their separate instructions, Clarence
+Tinling remaining by the cedar.
+
+'I have to be a little sharp now and then,' he explained. 'Why, if I
+didn't keep an iron rule over them, they'd be getting insubordinate in
+no time. You mustn't think I've any objection to their playing tennis,
+or anything of that sort; only discipline must be kept up; though it
+seems severe, perhaps, to you.'
+
+'It doesn't seem to be half bad fun for _you_, at all events,' said
+Hazel.
+
+'Of course,' added Hilary, whose cheeks were flushed and eyes
+suspiciously bright as she plucked all the blades of grass that were
+within her reach, 'we're glad if you're enjoying being here; but it's a
+little slow for us girls. You might give the army a half-holiday now and
+then.'
+
+'An army, especially a small army, like ours,' said Clarence, grandly,
+'ought to be constantly prepared for action; else it's no use. Then,
+look at the protection it is. Why, we've just built a fortified place
+close to the kitchen garden, where you could all retire to if we were
+attacked; and, properly provisioned, we could hold out for almost any
+time.'
+
+'Thank you,' said Hilary. 'I should feel a good deal safer in the
+box-room. And then, who's going to attack us?'
+
+'Well, you never know,' replied Clarence; 'but, if they did come, it's
+something to feel we should be able to defend ourselves.'
+
+'Yes, Hilary,' Cecily remarked, 'an army would certainly be a great
+convenience then.'
+
+'That would depend on what it did,' said her sister. 'It wouldn't be
+much of a convenience if it ran away.'
+
+'I don't think Jack and Guy would ever do that,' observed Hazel.
+
+'I suppose that means that you think I should?' inquired Clarence, who
+was quick at discovering personal allusions.
+
+'I wasn't thinking about you at all,' said Hazel, with supreme
+indifference; 'we don't know you well enough to say whether you're brave
+or not--we do know our brothers.'
+
+'There wouldn't be much sense in my being the General if I wasn't the
+bravest, would there?' he demanded.
+
+'Well, as to that, you see,' retorted Hilary, 'we don't see much sense
+in any of it.'
+
+'Girls can't be expected to see sense in anything,' he said sulkily.
+
+'At all events, no one can be expected to see bravery till there's some
+danger,' said Hazel; 'and there isn't the least!'
+
+'That's all you know about it; but I've something more important to do
+than stay here squabbling. I'm off to see what the army's up to.' And he
+marched off with great pomp.
+
+When he had disappeared, Hilary remarked frankly, 'Isn't he a pig?'
+
+'I don't think it's nice to call our visitors "pigs," Hilary!'
+remonstrated Cecily, 'and he's not really more greedy than most boys.'
+
+'Don't lecture, Cis. I didn't mean he was that kind of pig--I said he
+was a pig. And he is!' said Hilary, not over lucidly. 'I wonder what
+Jack and Guy can see in him. I thought that when they wrote asking him
+to be invited, that he'd be sure to be such a jolly boy!'
+
+'He may be a jolly boy--at school,' was all that even the tolerant
+Cecily could find to urge in his favour.
+
+'I believe,' said Hazel, 'that they're not nearly so mad about him as
+they were--didn't you notice about the tennis just now?'
+
+'He bullies them--that's what it is,' explained Hilary; 'only with
+talking, I mean, of course, but he talks such a lot, and he will have
+his own way, and, if they say anything, he reminds them he's a visitor,
+and ought to be humoured. I wish it was any use getting Uncle Lambert to
+speak to him--but he's so stupid!'
+
+'Is he, though?' said a lazy voice from behind the cedar.
+
+'Oh, Uncle Lambkin!' cried Hilary, 'I didn't know you were there!'
+
+'Don't apologise,' was the answer. 'I know it must be a trial to have an
+uncle on the verge of imbecility--but bear with me. I am at least
+harmless.'
+
+'Of course we know you're really rather clever,' said Hazel, 'but you
+_are_ stupid about some things--you never interfere, whatever people
+do!'
+
+'Don't I, really?' said their uncle, as he disposed himself on his back,
+and tilted his hat over his nose; 'you do surprise me! What a mistake
+for a man to make, who has come down for perfect quiet! Whom shall I
+begin to interfere with?'
+
+'Well, you might snub that horrid Tinling boy, instead of encouraging
+him, as you always do!'
+
+'Encourage him! He's got a fine flow of martial enthusiasm, and a good
+supply of military terms, and I listen when he gives me long accounts of
+thrilling engagements, when he came out uncommonly strong--and the
+enemy, so far as I can gather, never came out at all. I'm passive,
+because I can't help myself; and then he amuses me in his way--that's
+all.'
+
+'Do you believe he's brave, uncle?'
+
+'I only know that I saw him kill two wasps with his teaspoon,' was the
+reply. 'They don't award the Victoria Cross for it--but it's a thing I
+couldn't have done myself.'
+
+'I should hope not!' exclaimed Hilary; 'but everybody knows you're a
+coward,' she added (she did not intend this remark to be taken
+seriously), 'and you're awfully lazy. Still, there are some things you
+might do!'
+
+'If that means fielding long-leg till tea-time, I respectfully disagree.
+Irreverent girls, have you never been taught that a digesting uncle is a
+very solemn and sacred thing?'
+
+'Now you are going to be idiotic again! But as to cricket--why, you must
+know that we never get a game now! And next summer I shall be too old to
+play!'
+
+'I _never_ mean to be too old for cricket,' said Hilary, with
+conviction; 'but we've had none for weeks, uncle, positive weeks!'
+
+'Quite right, too!' observed Uncle Lambert, sleepily. 'Not a game for
+girls--only spoil your hands--do you think I want a set of nieces with
+paws like so many glovers' signs?'
+
+'That's utter nonsense,' said Hazel, calmly, 'because we always play in
+gloves. Mother makes us. At least, when we did play. Now the boys will
+only play soldiers, and, if they do happen to be inclined for a set at
+tennis, Clarence comes up and orders them off as pickets or outposts, or
+something!'
+
+'But he's not Bismarck or Boulanger, is he? I always understood this was
+a free country.'
+
+'You know what Guy and Jack are--they can't bear their visitor to think
+he isn't welcome.'
+
+'Well, they seem to have made him feel very much at home--but it isn't
+my business; if they choose to declare the house in a state of siege,
+and turn the garden into a seat of war, I can't help it--I'd rather they
+wouldn't, but it's your mother's affair, not mine!'
+
+And he closed the discussion by lighting a cigarette, and relapsing into
+a contented silence.
+
+Uncle Lambert was short and stout, with a round red face, a heavy auburn
+moustache, and little green eyes which never seemed to notice anything.
+His nieces were fond of him, though they often wished he would pay them
+the occasional compliment of talking sensibly; but he never did, and he
+spent all his time at The Gables in elaborately doing nothing at all.
+
+Clarence Tinling had gone off in a decided huff--so much so indeed that
+he left his devoted army to carry out their rather misty manoeuvres
+without any help from him. He was beginning to find a falling-off in
+their docility of late, which was no doubt owing to their sisters; it
+was excessively annoying to him that those girls should be so difficult
+to convince of the protective value of a fortress, and especially that
+they should decline to take his own superior nerve and courage for
+granted. And the worst of it was, nothing but some imminent danger was
+ever likely to convince them, such were their prejudice and
+narrow-mindedness.
+
+Later that afternoon the family assembled for tea in the cool, shady
+dining-room; Mrs. Jolliffe, with a gentle anxiety on her usually placid
+face, sat at the head (Colonel Jolliffe was away shooting in the North
+just then). 'Where are all the boys?' she said, looking round the table.
+'Why don't they come in?'
+
+'It's no use asking us, mother,' said Hilary, 'we see so very little of
+them ever.'
+
+'Very likely they are washing their hands,' said her mother.
+
+'So _like_ them!' murmured Uncle Lambert in confidence to his tea-cake.
+'But here's the noble General, at all events. Well, Field Marshal, what
+have you done with the Standing Army?'
+
+Tinling addressed himself to his hostess. 'Oh, Mrs. Jolliffe, I'm so
+sorry I was late, but I had just to run round to the stables for a
+minute. Oh, the other two? They're on duty--they're guarding the camp.
+In fact, I can't stay here very long myself.'
+
+'But the poor dear boys must have their tea!' cried Mrs. Jolliffe.
+
+'Well, you know,' said their veteran officer, as he helped himself to
+the marmalade, 'I don't think a little roughing it is at all a bad
+thing for them--teaches them that a soldier's life is not all jam.'
+
+'No,' said Hazel, 'the General seems to get most of that.'
+
+All Clarence said was: 'I'll trouble one of you girls for the tea-cake.'
+
+'I don't think it's fair that the poor army should "rough," as you call
+it, while you stuff, Clarence,' said Hazel, indignantly. 'Mustn't they
+come in to tea, mother? It is such nonsense!'
+
+'Yes, dear, run and call them in,' said Mrs. Jolliffe. 'I can't let my
+boys go without their meals, Clarence, it's so bad for them.'
+
+'It's not discipline,' said the chief; 'still, if they must come, you
+had better take them this permit from me.' And he scribbled a line on a
+scrap of paper, which he handed to Hazel, who received it with the
+utmost disdain.
+
+Hazel crossed the lawn and over a little rustic bridge to the kitchen
+garden and hothouses, beyond which was the paddock, where the fortress
+had been erected. It was a very imposing construction, built, with some
+help from the village carpenter, of portions of some disused fencing.
+The stockade had loopholes in it, and above the top she could see a
+fluttering flag and the point of a tent. Jack was perched up on a kind
+of look-out, and Guy was pacing solemnly before the covered entrance
+with a musket of very mild aspect over his shoulder.
+
+'Who goes there?' he called out, some time after recognising her.
+
+Hazel vouchsafed no direct reply to this challenge. 'You're to come in
+to tea _directly_,' she announced in her most peremptory tone.
+
+'Advance, and give the countersign,' said the sentinel.
+
+'Don't be a donkey!' returned Hazel, tossing back her long brown hair
+impatiently.
+
+Guy levelled his firearm. It is exasperating when a sister can't enter
+into the spirit of the thing better than that. Who ever heard of a
+sentry being told, on challenging, 'not to be a donkey'? 'My orders are
+to fire on all suspicious persons,' he informed her.
+
+Hazel stopped both her ears. 'No, Guy, please--it makes me jump so.'
+
+'There's no cap on,' said he.
+
+'Then there's a ramrod, or a pea, or something horrid,' she objected;
+'do turn it the other way.'
+
+'Hazel's all right, Guy,' said Jack, in rebuke of this excessive zeal;
+'we can let her pass.'
+
+'As if I wanted to pass!' exclaimed Hazel. 'I only came to bring you
+back to tea; and if you're afraid to go without leave, there's a
+permission from Clarence for you.'
+
+'Oh! come in and have a look now you're here,' said the garrison more
+hospitably. 'You can't think how jolly the inside is.'
+
+'Well, if I must,' she said; though, as a matter of fact, she was
+exceedingly curious to see the interior of the stronghold.
+
+'It's like the ones in "Masterman Ready" and "Treasure Island," you
+see,' explained Jack, proudly. 'And it's pierced for musketry, too; we
+could open a withering fire on besiegers before they could come near
+us.'
+
+'They would have to be rather stupid to want to besiege this, wouldn't
+they?' said Hazel.
+
+'I don't see that--besiegers must besiege something. And it is snug,
+isn't it, now?'
+
+Hazel was secretly much impressed. In the centre of the enclosure was
+the commander's tent, with a lantern fixed at the pole for night
+watches; and rugs and carpets were strewn about; at one of the angles of
+the palisading was the look-out--an elaborate erection of old wine-cases
+and egg-boxes--on the top of which was fixed a seven-and-sixpenny
+telescope that commanded the surrounding country for quite a hundred
+yards.
+
+She was not the person, however, to go into raptures; she merely smiled
+a rather teasing little smile, and said, 'Mar-vellous!' but somehow,
+whatever sarcasm underlay this was accepted by both boys as a tribute.
+
+'You can see now,' said Guy, in a reasonable tone, 'that there wouldn't
+have been room here for all you girls--now, would there?'
+
+'Girls are always in the way--everywhere,' said Hazel, with a
+reproachful inflection which was quite lost upon her brothers.
+
+'I knew you'd be sensible about it,' said Jack; 'you can't think what
+fun we have in here--especially at night, when the lantern's lit. Hallo!
+there's some one calling.'
+
+A shrill whistle sounded from the kitchen garden, and, a moment after, a
+stone came flying over the stockade, and was stopped by the canvas of
+the tent.
+
+'That's cool cheek!' said Jack; 'get up and reconnoitre, Guy--quick!'
+
+Guy mounted the scaffold, and brought the telescope to bear upon the
+immediate neighbourhood with admirable coolness and science--but no
+particular result.
+
+'We shall have to scour the bush and see if we can find any traces of
+the enemy,' said he with infinite relish.
+
+'Was that the stone?' said Hazel, pointing to one that lay at the foot
+of the fence; 'because there seems to be some paper wrapped round it.'
+
+'So there is!' said Jack, proceeding to unfold it. Presently he
+exclaimed, 'I _say_!'
+
+'What is it now?' asked Hazel.
+
+'Nothing for you--it's private!' said Jack, mysteriously. 'Here, Guy,
+come down and look at this.'
+
+Guy read it and whistled. 'We must report this to the General at once,'
+he said gravely.
+
+Both boys were very solemn, and yet had a certain novel air of satisfied
+importance.
+
+'Shall we tell her?' asked Guy.
+
+'She must know it some time,' returned Jack; 'we'll break it by
+degrees.--We've just had notice that we're going to be attacked by Red
+Indians, Hazel; don't be alarmed.'
+
+'I'll try not to be,' she said, conquering a very strong inclination to
+laugh. She saw that they took it quite seriously; and, though she had at
+once suspected that some one in the village was playing them a trick,
+she did not choose to enlighten them. Hazel had a malicious desire to
+see what the General would do. 'I don't believe he will like the idea at
+all,' she said to herself. 'What fun it will be!'
+
+Hazel's expectations seemed about to be fulfilled; for already she could
+hear steps on the plank of the little bridge, and in another minute the
+General himself entered the fortress.
+
+'I say, you fellows,' he began, 'this is too bad--no one on guard, and a
+girl inside! Why, she might be a spy for anything you could tell!'
+
+'Thank you, Clarence!' said Hazel; for this insinuation was rather
+trying to a person of her dignity.
+
+'I say, General,' began Jack, 'never mind about rowing us now; we've
+some queer news to report. This has just fallen into our hands.'
+
+Hazel watched Tinling closely as he read the paper. It was grimy, and
+printed in lead pencil, and contained these words:--'BE ON THE LUKOUT.
+RED INGIANS ON THE WORPATH. I HERD THEM SAYING THEY MENT TO ATACK YURE
+FORT AT NITEFAL. FROM A FREND.'
+
+She was soon compelled to own that she had done him a great injustice.
+He was certainly as far as possible from betraying the slightest fear;
+on the contrary, his eye seemed actually to brighten with satisfaction.
+He behaved exactly as all heroes in books of adventure do on such
+occasions--he went through it twice carefully, and then inquired at what
+time the warning had arrived.
+
+'About five minutes ago. Round a stone,' answered Guy, with true
+military conciseness.
+
+'This will be a bad business,' observed the General, his face
+brightening with the joy of battle. 'We have no time to spare--we must
+give these demons a lesson they will not forget!' (this was out of the
+books). 'Look to your arms, my men, and see that we are provisioned for
+a siege (you might get the cook to give us some of that shortbread, and
+the rest of the cake we had at tea, Private Jack). We cannot tell to
+what straits we may be reduced.'
+
+'Then,' inquired Hazel, demurely, 'you mean to stay here and fight
+them?'
+
+'To the last gasp!' said the General.
+
+Hazel liked him better then than she had done since his first arrival.
+
+'He really is a plucky boy after all,' she thought. 'I wonder if it will
+last?'
+
+
+
+
+ACT THE SECOND
+
+WHERE IS THE ARMY?
+
+
+The General's self-possession and resource were indeed remarkable.
+
+'We ought to have a cannon,' he said; 'there's a big roll of matting
+somewhere in the house. If we got that, and widened a loophole, and
+shoved it through, it would look just like the muzzle of a cannon in the
+dark.'
+
+'Would that frighten a Red Indian much?' asked Hazel.
+
+'Not if he knew what it was, perhaps; but who's going to tell him? Jack,
+just run up to the house, like a good fellow, and see if you can find
+it, will you? You can go with him, Guy.'
+
+'You seem rather to like the idea of being attacked,' said Hazel, when
+she and Clarence were alone together. He was gratified to notice the new
+friendliness in her voice.
+
+'Well, you see,' he explained loftily, 'I don't suppose I'm pluckier
+than most people, but it just happens that I'm not afraid of Red
+Indians, that's all; when I saw all those at Buffalo Bill's I wasn't
+even excited: it's constitutional, I fancy.' He always modelled his talk
+a good deal upon books, and a crisis like this naturally brought out his
+largest language.
+
+'I'd better see you safe back to the house, I think,' he added; 'I don't
+expect them for an hour yet, but you can never depend on savages--they
+might be lurking about the grounds already, for what we know.'
+
+And, although Hazel had her own private ideas about the reality of the
+danger, she was struck by his coolness and courage, for which, whether
+justified or not by the occasion, she was quite fair-minded enough to
+give him due credit.
+
+Meanwhile, the other two boys, bursting with excitement, had rushed up
+to the verandah, under which their mother and uncle were sitting.
+
+'Mother! Uncle Lambert! What do you think? Our camp is going to be
+attacked this very night by Indians!'
+
+'Yes, dears,' said Mrs. Jolliffe, serenely; 'but have you had your teas
+yet?'
+
+Trifles such as these harrow the martial soul more than conflicts.
+
+'But, mother, did you hear what we said? The fort is to be stormed by
+Red Indians!'
+
+'Very well, dears, so long as you don't make too much noise,' was the
+sole comment of this most provokingly placid lady. What she ought to
+have done was, of course, to throw down her work, raise her eyes to the
+clouds, clasp her hands, and observe, in an agitated tone, 'Heaven
+protect us! We are lost!' But few mothers are capable of really rising
+to emergencies of this kind.
+
+Hilary and Cecily had been playing tennis, and, overhearing the alarming
+news, came up to the steps of the verandah. 'Did you say Red Indians
+were coming here?'
+
+Uncle Lambert shook his head lugubriously. 'I always warned your
+father,' he remarked; 'but he _would_ come to live in Berkshire.'
+
+'Why?' inquired Cecily. 'Is Berkshire a bad place for Red Indians,
+uncle?'
+
+'I should say it was one of the worst places in all Europe!' he said
+solemnly.
+
+Both Hilary and Cecily had heard and read a good deal about Red Indians
+lately, and had also, with their brothers, visited the American
+Exhibition, so that it did not strike either of them as unlikely just
+then that there should be a few scattered about in England, just as
+gipsies are.
+
+'But what are you going to do about it?' they asked their brother.
+
+'Lick 'em, of course!' said Guy. 'Now you see that an army is some use,
+after all.'
+
+'Don't be taken alive, there's good boys,' advised their frivolous
+uncle, who seemed still unable to realise the extreme gravity of the
+occasion. 'Sell your lives as dearly as possible.'
+
+'What is the use of telling them that, uncle?' exclaimed Cecily. 'They
+wouldn't get the money; and do you think any of _us_ would touch it? How
+can you talk in that horrid way? Jack and Guy, don't go to that camp.
+Let the Indians have it, if they want to; you can soon build another.'
+
+'You don't understand,' said Jack, impatiently. 'We can't have a lot of
+Red Indians in our camp--it wouldn't be safe for you.'
+
+'Oh, I shall go and speak to Clarence,' she cried. 'I'm sure he won't
+want to fight them.' And she ran down to the end of the lawn, where he
+could be seen returning with Hazel.
+
+'I want to speak to you quite alone,' she said. 'No, Hazel, it's a
+secret,' and she drew him aside.
+
+'Clarence,' she said, and her blue eyes were dark with fear, 'tell
+me--are the Indians really coming?'
+
+'You can judge for yourself,' he said, and gave her the paper. 'We've
+just had this thrown over the stockade. It seems to have been written by
+somebody who is in their secrets.'
+
+'How badly Red Indians do spell!' said Cecily, shuddering as she read.
+
+'It may be a white man's writing,' he said; 'perhaps a prisoner, or a
+confederate who repents.'
+
+'But, Clarence, dear,' entreated Cecily (ten minutes ago she would not
+have added the epithet), 'you won't stay out and sit up for them, will
+you?'
+
+'Do you think we're a set of cowards?' he demanded grandly.
+
+'Not you, Clarence; but--but Jack and Guy are not very big boys, are
+they? I mean, they're a little too young to fight full-sized Indians.'
+
+'There will be all sorts of sized Indians, I expect,' said Clarence. 'Of
+course, I don't say they'll come. They may think discretion's the better
+part of valour when they find we're prepared; but I must say I
+anticipate an attack myself.'
+
+'I wish you would do without Jack and Guy. Couldn't you?' suggested
+Cecily.
+
+His eyes gleamed. 'Cecily,' he said, 'tell me the worst--the army are
+getting in a funk?'
+
+'No,' she cried; and then she resolved to sacrifice their reputation for
+their safety. 'At least, they haven't said anything; but I'm sure they'd
+feel more comfortable in the drawing-room. Can't you order them to stay
+and guard us? You're General.'
+
+'And I am to face the foe alone?' he cried. 'Well, I am older than them'
+(I must decline to be responsible for the grammar of the characters of
+this story). 'I have lived my life--I shall be the less missed.... Let
+it be as you say.'
+
+All this was strictly according to the books, and he enjoyed himself
+immensely.
+
+'Thank you, dear, dear Clarence. I'd no idea you were so noble and
+brave. Try not to let those Indians hit you.'
+
+'I cannot answer for the future,' he said; 'but since you wish it I will
+do my best.'
+
+After all there was some good in girls. Here was one who said exactly
+the right things, without needing any prompting whatever.
+
+Cecily hunted up Jack and Guy, who were poking about in the house.
+'You're not to guard the stockade,' she announced, with ill-concealed
+triumph.
+
+'Oh, aren't we, though?' said Guy; 'who says so? Not mother!'
+
+'No--Clarence; he said I was to tell you to go on duty in the
+drawing-room.'
+
+'What bosh!' said Guy. 'As if any Indians would come there! I don't care
+what Clarence says, I shall go in the stockade!'
+
+'So shall I! 'said Jack. 'Now let's get that piece of matting, and go
+down sharp--the evening star's out already.'
+
+Poor Cecily was in despair; what was to be done when they were so
+obstinate as this?
+
+'I know where there's some beautiful matting,' she said.
+
+'Where? Tell us, quick!'
+
+'Come with me, and I'll show you.' She led the way along a corridor to
+the wing where the billiard-room was. 'Wait till I see if it's there
+still,' she said, and went into the billiard-room and looked around.
+'Yes, it _is_ there,' she told them as she came out.
+
+'I don't see it, Cecily; where?' they cried from within.
+
+Cecily shut the door softly, and turned the key (which she had managed
+to abstract on entering) in the outer lock.
+
+'It's on the floor,' she cried through the keyhole; 'I didn't tell a
+story--and don't be angry, boys, dear, it's all for your good!'
+
+Then, without waiting to hear their indignant outcry, she scudded along
+the corridor and down the staircase, with the sounds of muffled shouts
+and kicks growing fainter behind her.
+
+'I don't mind so much now,' she thought; 'they'll be awfully angry when
+they come out--but the Indians will have gone by that time!'
+
+Clarence had already retreated to his stronghold when she entered the
+drawing-room.
+
+Everything seemed as usual; Uncle Lambert, in evening dress, was playing
+desultory snatches from _Ruddigore_. Mrs. Jolliffe came down presently,
+and he took her in to dinner with one of his tiresome jokes. No one
+seemed at all anxious about poor Tinling, fighting all alone down in the
+paddock.
+
+She curled herself up on a settee by one of the open windows, and
+listened, trying to catch the sound of Indian yells. 'Hazel,' she said
+anxiously, 'do you think the Indians will hurt Tinling?'
+
+Hazel gave a little laugh. 'I don't think the army's in any very great
+danger, Cis,' she replied.
+
+'Hazel doesn't believe there are any Indians at all,' explained Hilary.
+
+'Well,' said Cecily, softly, 'I've kept the army out of danger, whether
+there are or not!'
+
+But she felt relieved by her sisters' evident tranquillity, and
+by-and-by, when Mrs. Jolliffe came in from the dining-room and settled
+down with her embroidery as if there were not the least chance of a
+savage coming whooping in the open window, Cecily almost forgot her
+fears.
+
+They came back in full force, however, as, a little later on, she heard
+a quick, light step on the gravel outside, and started with a little
+scream of terror. 'Don't tell them where the army are!' she cried; and
+then she saw that her alarm was needless, for it was the gallant General
+who stepped into the room. Hazel looked up from the album which she was
+making for a children's hospital, Hilary threw away her book, Mrs.
+Jolliffe had ceased to embroider, but that was because she was
+peacefully dozing.
+
+'Victory!' said Clarence, waving his sword.
+
+'Then they did come?' cried Cecily, triumphantly.
+
+'Rather!' he replied. 'I couldn't tell how many there were, but they
+were overcome with panic at the first discharge. I fancy _these_ Indians
+had never heard firearms before.'
+
+'How funny that we shouldn't have heard any now!' remarked Hazel,
+resting her chin on her palms, while her grey eyes had a rather mocking
+sparkle in them.
+
+'Not funny at all,' he said, 'considering the wind was the other way. I
+let them come on, and then poured a volley into the thickest part of
+their ranks--that made them waver, and then I made a sortie, and you
+should have just seen them scuttle!'
+
+'I wish I had,' said Hazel, as she pasted another Christmas card into
+her album. 'And weren't you wounded at all?'
+
+'A mere scratch,' he said lightly (which is what book-heroes always
+say).
+
+'It looks as if you had been amongst the gooseberry-bushes,' said
+Hilary, examining his arm as he pulled up his sleeve.
+
+'Does it? Well, I only know it's lucky for me there were no poisoned
+arrows.'
+
+'Oughtn't you to have it burnt, though, Clarence, just in case?'
+suggested Cecily, in all good faith; 'there's sure to be a red-hot poker
+in the kitchen.'
+
+But Clarence was very decidedly of opinion that such a precaution was
+not necessary.
+
+'And you're quite sure the Indians are all gone?' she asked.
+
+'There isn't one of 'em within miles,' he said confidently, 'I'll answer
+for that.'
+
+'Then come upstairs with me, and we'll let the army out. They'll be in
+such a temper!'
+
+They found the two boys, who had tired of kicking and shouting by that
+time, sitting gloomily on the long seats in the dark.
+
+'Guy, dear--Jack,' said Cecily, timidly, 'you can come out now. Clarence
+has beaten the Indians.'
+
+'Without us?' groaned Guy. 'Cecily, I'll never speak to you again!
+Tinling, I--we--you don't think we funked, do you? She locked us up
+here!'
+
+All the General's native magnanimity came out now.
+
+'We won't say any more about it,' he said. 'It was rather a close shave,
+with only one man to do it all. But, there, I managed somehow, and
+perhaps it was just as well you weren't there. The first rush was no
+joke, I can tell you.'
+
+Jack punched his own head with both hands.
+
+'Oh, it's too bad!' he said--he was almost in tears. 'They'll all think
+we deserted you! Did you kill many of them, Tinling?'
+
+'I didn't see any corpses,' he replied; 'but I shouldn't be surprised if
+some of them died when they got home.'
+
+'They may come again to-morrow night,' said Jack, more cheerfully.
+
+'Not much fear of that--they've had their lesson. They were seized with
+utter panic.'
+
+'Which way did they go?' asked Guy, evidently bent on pursuing them.
+
+'Oh, in all directions. But you wouldn't catch them up now; they ran too
+fast for me even!'
+
+'Then I shall go to bed,' said the entire army, in great depression. 'It
+is a shame we couldn't be there. Good-night, General.' And, pointedly
+ignoring poor Cecily, they marched off to their quarters. She looked
+wistfully after them.
+
+'They'll never forgive me--I know they won't!' she said to Tinling.
+
+'Don't you mind,' he said, 'you acted very wisely. And, after all, these
+raw young troops can never be depended on under fire, you know--I mean,
+under arrows.'
+
+Cecily drew herself up a little haughtily.
+
+'I locked them in because I didn't want them to get hurt,' she said,
+'not because I thought they'd be afraid.'
+
+Uncle Lambert did not hear about the result of the engagement until the
+following day, but then, to make up for any delay, he heard a good deal
+about it. Even Clarence was not quite prepared for the enthusiasm he
+showed.
+
+'Splendid, my boy, splendid!' he kept repeating, while he hit him rather
+hard on the back; 'you're a hero. A grateful country ought to give you
+the Bath for it. I shall take care this affair is generally known.'
+
+And the poor army looked on with hot cheeks and envious eyes. But for
+Cecily, they might have been heroes, too!
+
+Even Hazel seemed to have understood that a really brilliant victory had
+been achieved; she brought Tinling a magnificent flag of pink glazed
+calico, on which she had painted in crimson letters: 'Indians' Terror.'
+
+'I did not think of making the motto "Seven at one blow,"' she said,
+with a mischievous dimple.
+
+'I like the other best,' said the General, unsuspectingly.
+
+Jack and Guy went down to the camp as usual, but for some time they were
+in very low spirits, in spite of their commander's well-meant efforts to
+raise them.
+
+'You'll do better next time,' he said kindly.
+
+'But we've told you over and over again how it was!' they would exclaim.
+
+'Yes, I know, I know. It's all right. I'm not complaining: I never
+expected you to be as cool as I was, your first time.' But even this did
+not seem to console the army to any large extent; they hunched their
+shoulders and kicked pebbles about with great apparent interest.
+
+The fact was, they could not help seeing that they had lost their
+prestige. It was true that their mother and elder sister at least (in
+spite of the flag) did not seem to treat the past danger with all the
+seriousness it deserved. It even struck Jack and Guy sometimes that
+they were under the delusion that the whole thing had been only a new
+development of the game. But as the General said: 'Even if that were so,
+it was kinder not to undeceive them. He certainly was contented to leave
+them in their error; he knew well enough what he had had to go
+through--he did not like even now to think of his despair when he found
+he would have to face the danger all alone.'
+
+He was always making the army writhe by little unintentional reminders
+of this kind, and they had cruel misgivings that Uncle Lambert, though
+he was always quite kind and encouraging, did not in his heart believe
+that their unfortunate absence in the hour of peril was quite an
+accident on their part.
+
+How they longed for an opportunity of wiping out their disgrace, and how
+their hearts sank when Tinling, from the depths of his experience,
+declared it very improbable that the attack would ever again be renewed.
+In the school-stories, the good boy who refuses to fight when he is
+kicked, and is sent to Coventry as a coward, always gets a speedy chance
+to clear his character. Someone (generally the very boy who kicked him)
+falls into a mill-stream, or a convenient horse runs away, or else a mad
+but considerate bull comes into the playground--and the good boy is
+always at hand to dive, or hang on to the bridle and be dragged several
+yards in the dust, or slowly retreat backwards, throwing down first his
+hat and then his coat to amuse and detain the infuriated bull.
+
+But out of stories, unfortunately, as even Jack and Guy dimly perceived,
+things are not always arranged so satisfactorily. They might have to
+wait for weeks, perhaps months or years, before Uncle Lambert fell into
+the fish-pond--and, even if he did, he could probably swim better than
+they could. Then they were neither of them sure that they could
+successfully stop a runaway horse, or a maniac bull, without a little
+more practice than they had had as yet.
+
+However, Fortune was kind, and took pity on them in a most unexpected
+manner. For one morning, soon after breakfast, when Hazel was practising
+in the music-room, and Hilary and Cecily feeding their rabbits, Jack
+came up in a highly-excited state of mind to the verandah where his
+officer was seated doing nothing in particular. 'General,' he said, with
+a very creditable salute, 'do come down to the camp at once.'
+
+'Oh, bother!' said the veteran warrior, who had, by the way, shown
+rather a tendency to rest on his laurels of late.
+
+'No, but it isn't humbug, really,' protested Jack; 'it's something
+you'll like awfully.'
+
+The General marched down in a very stately manner; it would have been
+undignified to run, eager as he was to get down to the stockade,
+thinking it not unlikely that Lintoft, the carpenter, really had found
+time to make a cannon for them after all, or, at the very least, that
+there would be some change in the internal arrangements of the
+stronghold which it would be his duty as superior officer to criticise,
+if not condemn.
+
+Now it must be explained here that, during the last two or three days,
+the outside wall of the fort had been placarded with various bills, all
+glorying in the recent repulse of the enemy by a single-handed defender,
+and containing most insulting reflections on the courage of Red Indians
+as a race; while, in case they might not have enough knowledge of
+English to understand these taunts, they were accompanied by sketches
+which were certainly scathing enough to infuriate the least susceptible
+savage.
+
+To do Clarence justice, they were not due to any elation on his part,
+but had all been executed by the army in the wild hope that they might
+thus stir up the foe to a fresh demonstration, when they themselves
+might recover their lost spurs.
+
+These placards, as Clarence found on reaching the stockade, had been
+scrawled over with a kind of red and yellow paint so as to be quite
+illegible.
+
+'Ochre,' said Guy; 'but that's not the best of it, for we found this
+pinned with an arrow to one of the posts.' And he produced a thin strip
+of white bark, on which were writing and drawings in crimson. 'They must
+have done it with their own blood,' commented Jack, with great gusto;
+'but read it--do read it.'
+
+Clarence did not need a second invitation to read the document, which
+was as follows:--
+
+
+                  'WAH NA SA PASH BOO (YELLOW VULTURE),
+
+        _Chief of Black Bogallala Tribe, to the Great White Chief,
+                          Tin Lin_, DEFIANCE.
+
+     'The wigwam of Yellow Vulture wants but one ornament--the scalp of
+     the white chief. Yellow Vulture has seen the taunts calling the red
+     warriors "women with the hearts of deer." He will show the Paleface
+     that the anger of the dusky ones is a big heap-lot terrible. When
+     the sun has set behind the hills, and the stars light their
+     watch-fires, then will Yellow Vulture and his braves be at hand.
+     The scalp of the Paleface shall adorn the tepee of the Red Man.
+
+                               'WAH-WAH!'
+
+
+In order that there should be no possible mistake about the intention,
+the message was supplemented by a rude representation of the process of
+scalping, evidently the work of a practised hand.
+
+'Didn't I tell you we had something jolly to show you!' exclaimed Jack.
+
+But joy, or some equally powerful emotion, rendered the General
+incapable of speaking for several moments.
+
+
+
+
+ACT THE THIRD
+
+WHERE IS THE GENERAL?
+
+
+It was some little time before Clarence Tinling gave any opinion upon
+this bloodthirsty document. He turned exceedingly red, and examined it
+suspiciously on both sides. It seemed as if he did not altogether
+welcome this second opportunity for distinguishing himself. When he
+spoke it was with a sort of angry anxiety.
+
+'You think yourselves very clever, I dare say,' he said; 'but you
+needn't fancy you'll take me in! Come, you had better say so at
+once--you did this yourselves? It is not half bad--I will say that for
+it.'
+
+'That we didn't,' cried Guy. 'Why, just look at it, Tinling. Any one
+could see that it's an Indian's doing. No, it's all right; they really
+are coming.'
+
+'It's all skittles, I tell you,' said Clarence, still more angrily,
+though he was paler again now. 'What should Indians come here for?'
+
+'Well, he says why, there,' said Jack, 'and they came the other
+evening.'
+
+Clarence's colour rose again. 'That's different,' he said; 'I mean, it's
+not the same tribe.'
+
+'No, these are Black Bogallalas,' said Jack. 'What were the first ones,
+Tinling?'
+
+'I didn't ask them,' said the General shortly.
+
+'How many braves should you think Wah Na What's-his-name will bring?'
+asked Guy. 'As many as came the other evening? How many did come the
+first time?'
+
+'Do you think I had nothing better to do than count?' he retorted. 'Is
+there anything else you would like to know?'
+
+'Well, we'll hang out the lantern to-night, and watch how many come
+inside its rays,' said Jack, with a briskness which displeased his
+chief.
+
+'You wouldn't be quite so jolly cheerful over it if you knew what it was
+like!' he grumbled.
+
+'Why not?' said Guy. 'You beat the others easily enough by yourself, and
+we shall be three this time.'
+
+'Oh, it's all very fine to talk,' retorted the General; 'but we shall
+see what your mother and uncle say about it. They--they may think we
+ought not to take any notice of it.'
+
+Jack's eyes opened wide at this. 'Not take any notice of an attack by
+Black Bogallalas! I don't see how we can very well help noticing it!'
+
+'It all depends on what Mrs. Jolliffe says,' replied the conscientious
+General. 'I'm only a visitor here, and it wouldn't be the right thing
+for me to lead you into danger without leave.'
+
+'Well, you weren't so particular the first time the Indians came!'
+remarked Guy.
+
+'Will you shut up about that first time!' the Commander burst out, in
+exasperation; 'it's the second time now--that is, if it isn't all
+humbug. That's what I mean to find out first--you stay here till I come
+back, will you?'
+
+Taking the strip of bark with him, he went slowly up to the house. He
+had an uneasy feeling that the Indian's challenge was genuine enough,
+but he still hoped to have it pronounced a forgery. This may seem
+strange indeed to some, considering the courage of which he had already
+given proof, but I do not wish to make any further mystery, particularly
+as most of my readers will probably have already guessed the secret of
+this apparent contrast.
+
+The fact is, then, that Clarence Tinling had the best of reasons for
+being cool and courageous on the previous occasion. Those Indians were
+entirely imaginary; he had written the warning himself, and instructed
+the coachman's boy to throw it over the stockade; the attack on the fort
+and the brilliant victory were an afterthought.
+
+What had he done it for? That is rather difficult to explain--perhaps he
+hardly knew himself; he had a vague idea of proving to those
+disrespectful girls that enemies did exist, and that the protection of
+an Army was not to be despised.
+
+Then when he found himself alone in the camp, the temptation to carry
+his invention further was too much for him; and after Jack and Guy and
+Cecily, and even Uncle Lambert himself, accepted his story without
+hesitation, and treated him as a hero--why, it would have looked so
+silly to explain then, and so he went through with it.
+
+Lying is lying, whatever explanations and excuses may be made respecting
+it, and I am afraid it must be admitted that Tinling, if he began by a
+mere harmless device for giving a new turn to the game, ended by telling
+some very unmistakable lies.
+
+Now he found himself in a most delicate position: what if an attack by
+Red Indians should really be quite possible? Mr. Lambert Jolliffe had
+certainly not seemed to see anything incredible in the former visit,
+and, though Clarence had not a very high opinion of his abilities, he
+was grown up, and was not likely to be misinformed on such a point as
+that--at all events, he was the best person to consult just then. As he
+expected, he found him under the big ilex on his back, with his
+after-breakfast pipe, no longer alight, between his lips.
+
+'Mr. Jolliffe; I say, Mr. Jolliffe,' began Clarence.
+
+Lambert Jolliffe sat up, and fixed his glass in one drowsy eye. 'Hullo,
+Sir Garnet--I beg your pardon, Lord Wolseley, I mean. You ought to hear
+what they're saying at the War Office, I can tell you!'
+
+Praise is sweet, even when we do not deserve it, and Clarence felt a
+thrill of satisfaction at this somewhat vague tribute.
+
+'I wanted to ask you,' he said, 'should you say that Red Indians
+were--well, common in England?'
+
+'You have asked me a straightforward question, and I'll give you a
+straightforward answer,' was the reply. 'Till quite lately I should say
+they were absolutely unknown in this country.'
+
+Clarence's face brightened; he felt quite fond of Uncle Lambert, and
+began to think him a particularly well-informed and entertaining person.
+
+'Yes,' continued Uncle Lambert, thoughtfully, 'I must confess I thought
+it a little unlikely at first that you should have been annoyed by Red
+Indians; but, of course, when I remembered the Earl's Court Show, I saw
+at once that it was quite possible.' Clarence felt a cold qualm. He had,
+as we already know, seen Buffalo Bill's wonderful show, which, indeed,
+was responsible for much of his recent military enthusiasm. But till
+that moment, curiously enough, it had not occurred to him to connect the
+mysterious Wah Na Sa Pash Boo with the denizens of the Wild West whom he
+had seen careering about the immense arena at Earl's Court.
+
+'Do you mean,' he said, with an effort, 'that you thought some of
+Buffalo Bill's Indians had managed to _escape_?'
+
+'Well, I don't know any other way to account for such a thing. Do you?'
+
+Clarence did not answer this question directly: 'But,' he objected
+desperately, 'those were _converted_ Indians. They went to church, and
+the Lyceum, and all that!'
+
+Uncle Lambert shrugged his shoulders: 'Once an Indian always an
+Indian!' he said. 'They must have their fling now and then, I suppose,
+and then the old Adam crops up. And you see,' he added, 'it cropped up
+in that attack on you the other night. Fortunately for us, and indeed
+for the whole country, you were prepared for them--otherwise no one can
+tell what horrors we might not have seen.'
+
+'We may--we may see them yet!' said the hero, gloomily. 'Just look at
+this, Mr. Jolliffe.'
+
+Lambert took the bark from him, and read it with a thoughtful frown. At
+last he said:
+
+'Well, I rather expected something of this sort when I saw you posting
+up all those insulting notices--Indians are so confoundedly touchy, you
+know.'
+
+'You might have said that at the time, then!' exclaimed the General
+reproachfully.
+
+Lambert lifted his eyebrows.
+
+'My dear chap, I thought you knew. Wasn't that what you were all driving
+at?'
+
+'Not me,' said Clarence. 'I was against it from the first. I told them
+it was caddish to insult a fallen foe, but they would go and stick up
+those _beastly_ notices.'
+
+'All's well that ends well, eh? You've got a rise out of 'em this time.
+I congratulate you, my boy, on getting the chance of a second brush with
+the Indians. And this time you'll have the army with you.'
+
+'A lot of good they are!' said Clarence, in a muffled voice.
+
+'Come, it's not good form for a General to run down his troops; but you
+heroes are always so modest. I'll be bound, now, you've determined not
+to mention this in the house till the danger is passed?'
+
+'No, I haven't, though. I shall mention it, most likely. Why not?'
+
+'To save them useless anxiety. Because, unless I am wrong, you see cause
+to apprehend (I must ask you not to conceal anything from me)--to
+apprehend that this will be a more serious affair than the last?'
+
+'Yes, I do,' replied the General, promptly, 'a good deal.'
+
+'I feared as much,' said Uncle Lambert, with a very grave face. 'But in
+that case, isn't it as well not to terrify my sister and those poor
+girls unnecessarily?'
+
+'I don't see that. Mrs. Jolliffe might think we ought to be guarding the
+inside of the house.'
+
+'Oh,' said Uncle Lambert, 'but I should object to that strongly. You see
+it's very plain that it's _you_ the Yellow Vulture's after. He won't
+think of coming near the house unless you're in it, and then what will
+become of us all?'
+
+'You'll take care you don't get mixed up in it, I can see,' said
+Tinling, savagely.
+
+'I shall take very good care indeed. Oh, but you must make allowances
+for me, my boy. Remember, I've not been in military training for days
+and days, as you have.'
+
+'If that's all, I could get you up in the drill in half-an-hour,'
+proposed Tinling, eagerly.
+
+'Thanks, but I have a better reason still. Tastes differ so much. You
+like to spend your evenings in beating off wild Indians from a stockade.
+Now, I prefer a plain, comfortable dinner, and a quiet cigar. I'm not
+sure that your way isn't the manlier of the two--but it's not nearly so
+much in my line.'
+
+'Why don't you say you're a funk, and have done with it?' Tinling said
+rudely.
+
+'My dear young friend,' was the placid answer, 'if Providence has
+endowed you with a meed of personal courage beyond that of others, it is
+ungraceful to taunt those who are less fortunate. While I am by no means
+prepared to admit that I am what you so pleasingly term "a funk," I
+readily allow that----'
+
+But Tinling did not stay to hear any more; he turned on his heel with an
+anger that had a spice of envy in it. Why, why had not he been content
+with an ordinary reputation, instead of one that he must sustain now at
+all hazards? He could deceive himself no longer; his foolish vanity,
+which had allowed the army to post those rash defiances, had brought
+down some real Red Indians upon him, and he was horribly afraid.
+
+As he walked restlessly down the path, a veil seemed drawn across the
+brilliant sky, the dahlias and 'red-hot pokers' and gladioli in the beds
+burnt with a sinister glow, the smell of the sweet peas and mignonette
+seemed oppressive, the bees droning about the lavender patches had a
+note of warning in their buzz, he felt chilly in the shade and sick in
+the sun.
+
+He saw nothing for it but fighting, but the idea of facing a horde of
+howling savages with only two boys younger than himself was too
+appalling; he must engage recruits, grown-up ones, and with this
+intention he went to the stable-yard, where he found Chinnock, the
+coachman, sluicing the carriage-wheels.
+
+'Chinnock,' he began, with an attempt to seem casual and careless,
+'we're going to be attacked by Red Indians again to-night.'
+
+Chinnock touched a sandy forelock, as he raised his red grinning face.
+
+'Lor', sir, be you indeed? Well, you young genl'men du have rare goings
+on down in the paddock, that you du.'
+
+'It's--it's real Red Indians this time, Chinnock--B--black Bogallalas!'
+
+Chinnock had deliberately moved to the harness-room, and Tinling had to
+repeat his information.
+
+'Ah, indeed, sir! Red Injians? Well, to think o' that!' he said
+cheerfully, as if he was humouring some rather childish remark.
+
+'But we shall want every available man; do you think you can spare time
+to come and help?'
+
+''Bout what time, sir?' said Chinnock.
+
+'About nine--half-past eight, say. Do try.'
+
+'Can't come as late as that, nohow, sir. That's my supper-hour, that
+is. If the mistress don't want the carriage to-day, I dessay I could
+step down 'bout five for half-an-hour or so, if that would suit.'
+
+'That wouldn't be any use at all, Chinnock; we shan't begin till dark.'
+
+'Then I'm afraid I can't be of no sarvice to 'ee, sir.'
+
+The poor General turned away: evidently the coachman had no intention of
+risking his life. He remembered Joe, the gardener's boy and
+stable-help--he was better than no one. Joe was rolling the
+tennis-court, and grinned sheepishly on being pressed to join.
+
+'Noa, sur,' he said, 'it doan't lay in my work fur to fight no Injins. I
+see one onst at Reading Vair, I did, a nippin' about he wur, and a
+roarin'! I bain't goin' to hev naught to do with the likes o' he!'
+
+Tinling saw only one hope left. If he could see Mrs. Jolliffe and tell
+her of the danger which threatened him, she might refuse permission to
+fight at all, or, at the very least, she would see that he had proper
+assistance. So into the house he went, and the first person he found was
+Hazel, who was knitting her pretty forehead over the Latin exercise
+which had been given her as a holiday task.
+
+'I say, Hazel,' he said, with a trembling voice; but she interrupted
+him:
+
+'Oh, perhaps you can help me. What's the Latin for "Balbus says it is
+all over with the General"?'
+
+He shivered; it sounded so like an omen. 'No, but Hazel, listen,' he
+said; 'the Indians are coming again to-night.'
+
+'If you're not going to talk sensibly,' said Hazel, 'go out this
+instant.'
+
+He saw she was utterly unsympathetic, and he wandered on to the hall,
+which was used as a morning-room, where Hilary sat painting a pansy, and
+he broke the news to her in much the same words. She actually laughed,
+and she had been almost as frightened as Cecily when he had told her of
+the other Indians.
+
+'You are too killing over those Red Indians!' she said. Privately, he
+thought that the Red Indians would do all the killing.
+
+'You needn't laugh; it's true!' he said solemnly.
+
+'Oh, of course!' said Hilary; 'but don't come so near, or you'll upset
+my glass of water.' Hilary, too, was hopeless; he was reduced to his
+last cards now, and came in upon Mrs. Jolliffe as she sat at her
+writing-table. She looked up with a sweet, vague smile.
+
+'What is it now, dear boy?' she asked. 'I hope you are managing to amuse
+yourself.'
+
+'I think I ought to tell you,' he said thickly, 'that a tribe of
+Bogallala Indians are going to storm our encampment this evening.'
+
+Perhaps Mrs. Jolliffe was getting a little bored with military topics.
+'Yes, yes,' she said absently, 'that will be very nice, I'm sure. Don't
+be too late in coming in, there's good boys.'
+
+'You don't _mind_ our being there?--there will be danger!' he said with
+meaning.
+
+'Mind? Not in the very least, so long as you are enjoying yourself,' she
+said kindly.
+
+There went one card: he had but one more. 'Could you let Corklett and
+George' (they were the butler and page respectively) 'come down to the
+camp about half-past eight? We should be so much safer if we had them
+with us.'
+
+'What are you thinking of, Clarence? We dine at eight, remember; how can
+I send either of them down then? You really must be reasonable.'
+
+Clarence was by no means an ill-mannered boy in general, but fear made
+him insolent at this.
+
+'Of course, if you think your dinner is more important than us!' he
+burst out hotly.
+
+'Clarence, I can't allow you to speak to me in that way. It is
+ridiculous for you to expect me to alter my arrangements to suit your
+convenience,' said Mrs. Jolliffe; 'leave the room, or I shall be really
+angry with you. I don't wish to hear any more--go.'
+
+He went with a swelling heart, and in the garden he met Cecily. If he
+could only induce her to beg him not to risk his life again! He
+disclosed the situation as impressively as he could; but, alas! Cecily
+seemed perfectly tranquil.
+
+'I'm not a bit afraid this time,' she said, 'because you beat them so
+easily before; there's only one thing, Clarence. You know I daren't lock
+the army in again--they've made it up; but they _were_ so cross over it!
+So I want you to promise to look after them.'
+
+'I shall have enough to do to look after myself, I expect,' he answered
+roughly; 'you don't know what these Indians are.'
+
+'Oh, but I do, Clarence; I saw them at the "Wild West." I thought they
+looked rather nice then. And you know you frightened them so before. You
+are so awfully brave--aren't you?'
+
+'I--I don't think I feel quite so awfully brave as I did then,' he
+admitted.
+
+'Ah, but you will. Jack and Guy will be quite safe with you. Good-bye;
+I'm going to get some mulberry-leaves for my silkworms.' And she ran off
+cheerfully.
+
+It was his hard fate that everybody persisted in treating the affair in
+one of two ways--either they looked upon it as part of the army game, or
+else considered him such a champion, on the strength of his past
+exploits, that there was practically no danger even if a whole tribe of
+Redskins came to attack him.
+
+Luncheon that day was a terrible meal for him. Uncle Lambert (though he
+was too great a coward to go near the fight himself) seemed very anxious
+that the defenders should be in good condition. 'Give yourself a
+chance, General,' he would say; 'another slice of this roly-poly pudding
+may just turn the scale between you and Yellow Vulture. Look at the
+army--they're victualling for a regular siege!'
+
+But Clarence was quite unable to follow their example; he was annoyed
+with them for what he considered was 'showing off'--though he might have
+reflected that to consume three helpings of jam-and-suet in rapid
+succession was an almost impossible form of bravado.
+
+The rest of the afternoon he spent in trying to lower the army's
+confidence by telling all the gruesome stories of Indian warfare he
+could think of; but he frightened himself a great deal more than them,
+and at last had to abandon the attempt in despair.
+
+For Jack and Guy had no nerves to speak of; they were eager to clear
+their tarnished reputation, and the possibility of harm coming to them
+did not seem to present itself. They had formed rather a poor opinion of
+Buffalo Bill's Indians, whose yell turned out to be very little more
+than short yelps, and who ran away directly a Cowboy showed his nose.
+Hadn't Clarence defeated them with ease already? What Clarence had done
+alone they surely could do together, and then they had an unbounded
+belief in the impregnable character of their stockade.
+
+Tinling found that he could not undeceive them without exposing himself,
+which he would still rather die than do, and he roamed about the
+grounds, making a little mental calculation whenever a clock struck in
+the heavy afternoon stillness: 'In so many hours from this I shall be
+fighting hand-to-hand with real Indians!'
+
+Then at tea-time he thought (for the first time) the smell of cake quite
+detestable, and he hardly knew how he forced himself to sit quietly on
+his chair.
+
+'General Tinling,' said Uncle Lambert, 'before you, so to speak, "go to
+the front" and occupy the post of danger, will you oblige me by drawing
+up the troops before the verandah? I should like, though unable to
+accompany you myself, to say a few words of farewell.'
+
+Clarence sulkily acquiesced, and Lambert Jolliffe addressed the army:
+'Soldiers,' he said, 'a great responsibility rests upon you this day.
+You are expected solemnly and earnestly to strive your utmost _not_ to
+
+
+     Let the red man dance
+     By _our_ red cedar tree,
+
+
+to quote (with a trifling variation) from Tennyson's "Maud." For myself,
+I have no fears of the result. Under the leadership of your veteran
+General, victory must infallibly crown your arms. We peaceful civilians
+shall rest secure in the absolute confidence such protection inspires,
+and be the first to welcome your triumphant return. Should your hearts
+fail you at any moment, I have already instructed you how to act. To
+the Commander himself I should consider the mere suggestion an
+impertinence. Go, then, devoted spirits, where Glory leads, and
+endeavour to avoid the indignity of scalping--if only for the sake of
+appearances. Soldiers, I have done. May the God of Battles (I need
+hardly explain to scholars that I refer to Mars) keep his eye on you!'
+
+Hazel and Hilary were also on the verandah, and used their handkerchiefs
+freely--but principally to conceal their mouths. 'They'll be sorry they
+laughed by-and-by;' thought Clarence; 'they'll wish they had cried just
+a little, perhaps!'--a reflection the pathos of which very nearly made
+him cry himself, as he marched down to the stockade, feeling distinctly
+unwell.
+
+Before he entered the fort he tore down the fatal notices. 'What's the
+good of that?' asked Guy.
+
+'Well, the Indians have seen 'em,' said the General.
+
+'But they'll think we want to back out of it,' objected Jack.
+
+'Let them think!' was the bold retort.
+
+Inside the fort Jack and Guy set to work in the highest spirits to
+barricade the entrance with wheelbarrows and an old mowing-machine; then
+they lit the lantern, and polished their guns, sharpened their swords,
+and looked to the springs of their pistols for about the hundredth time.
+
+'I say, this would jolly well pepper a Red Indian, wouldn't it!' cried
+Guy, showing a pistol, the tiny barrel of which was constructed to
+discharge swanshot with a steel watch-spring.
+
+'I tell you what,' said Jack, with the air of a trapper, 'I shall
+reserve my peas till I've fired away all the corks, and take a
+deliberate aim each time.'
+
+It was impossible to persuade them that these missiles would not be
+accepted as deadly by savages, who of course would know no better; and
+again, had not the first victory been won by these simple means?
+
+So General Tinling held his peace, and the western sky slowly changed
+from crocus to green, and from green to deep violet, and the evening
+star lighted its steady golden fire, the grasshoppers set up a louder
+chirp, a bat executed complicated figures overhead, and the boys
+unconsciously began to speak in whispers.
+
+'It's getting too dark to see much with this telescope,' said Jack, 'I
+wish we had a night-glass. The Indians ought to be here by this
+time--they said "sunset," didn't they? If I _was_ a Red Indian I would
+be punctual! When do you suppose they'll come, Clarence--soon?'
+
+'How on earth do I know?' snapped the General from within the tent.
+
+'Well, you needn't get in a bait over it. How did they come on the first
+time--did they crawl along like snakes till they were quite near, and
+then give a yell and rush at the stockade?'
+
+'I forget what they did--don't bother me!'
+
+'I suppose they'll all have tomahawks,' said Guy. 'Clarence, does
+scalping hurt?'
+
+There was a slight convulsion inside the tent, but no answer.
+
+'I wonder if the Bogallala torture prisoners,' Jack observed; 'I don't
+think I could stand _that_.'
+
+The General came to the tent-door at this: 'Can't you fellows shut up?'
+he said fiercely. 'They'll hear you!'
+
+'They're not here yet--we shall know when they come, by the
+signalling--let's all keep quite quiet for a minute or two.'
+
+There was a breathless interval of silence. At last Jack said: 'I hear
+something--a sort of low grunting noise, like pigs.'
+
+'Perhaps it is the pigs at the farm,' suggested Guy.
+
+'Indians can imitate all kinds of birds, I know,' reasoned Jack, not
+directly to the point, perhaps, but he was getting excited.
+
+Tinling felt a dull rage against the other two. How dared they pretend
+not to be afraid? It was all swagger--he knew that very well. Various
+unpleasant recollections began to rise in his mind. He remembered how
+that Indian spy had stalked the settler's cabin at Earl's Court. He
+could see him now, stealing over the sand, then listening with his ear
+to the ground, and turning to beckon on the ambushed warriors. He even
+remembered the way the yellow and red striped blinds of the log hut
+flapped in the wind, and how the horse that was hobbled outside raised
+his head from his hay, and pricked his ears uneasily, as the foe came
+gliding nearer and nearer. Then their way of fighting--he had thought it
+rather comic _then_--they hopped and pranced about like so many lively
+frogs, but the butchery would not be rendered any more agreeable by
+being accompanied by laughable gestures! And there was an almost naked
+light-yellow savage, whom he recalled dancing the war dance--he tried
+not to think of all this, but it came vividly before him.
+
+'S-s-h--_Cave_!' cried Guy, suddenly, as he looked through the loophole;
+'I can see just the top of one's head and feathers among the currant
+bushes. I'll touch him up in a second.'
+
+He raised his tiny spring pistol, and was just aiming, when Tinling,
+almost beside himself, darted on him, and struck it out of his hand.
+'What are you doing now?' he said, through his teeth. 'What is the good
+of _irritating_ them?'
+
+'Why, they _are_ irritated,' said Guy, 'or they wouldn't come.'
+
+'If they are,' retorted Clarence, raising his voice, 'whose doing was
+it? You can't say I had anything to do with putting up those defiances!
+Haven't I always said I respected Red men? They've got feelings like us.
+When you go and insult them, of course they get annoyed--who wouldn't, I
+should like to know? I honour a chief like Yellow Vulture myself, and I
+don't care if he hears me say so. I say I honour him!'
+
+His voice rose almost to a scream as he concluded.
+
+'I say, Tinling, I do believe you're in a funk!' said Guy, after a
+moment of wondering silence.
+
+'If you are, say so, and we shall know what to do,' added Jack, feeling
+in his pocket. 'Are you?'
+
+'Feel his hands,' suggested Guy.
+
+'Look here,' said Clarence, dashing aside the obstacles before the door,
+'I'm not going to stay here to be treated in this way. If it hadn't been
+for your foolery in sticking up the notices we should have been friends
+with the Indians now. I don't want to quarrel with any Bogallala. And
+you have the cheek to ask me if I'm in a funk, and to want to feel my
+hands. Well, it just serves you right--I'm going.'
+
+'Well, go then; who wants you?' said Guy.
+
+But softer-hearted Jack said, 'Clarence, you mustn't. You'll be safe in
+here; but out there----'
+
+But the General had already vanished. He was crouching outside in the
+shadow of the stockade. He could not bear being penned up any longer; he
+must at least have a run for his life.
+
+Had the enemy heard him declare his innocence? If so, it did not seem to
+have softened them. They were still crouching--silent, hidden,
+relentless--behind the currant bushes, their scouts signalling to one
+another, for no _real_ grasshopper ever made so much noise as that. He
+must make a bolt for it, and take his chance of their arrows missing
+him. Over the open space of grey-green grass he scuttled, and actually
+succeeded in reaching the friendly shadow of the holly hedge unharmed;
+but that was probably because they felt so certain of cutting him off at
+their pleasure.
+
+On tiptoe and trembling went the General along the narrow paths, green
+with damp, and latticed by the shadows which branches cast in the sickly
+moonlight, until--just when he was almost clear of the gloom--his knees
+bent under him; for there, at the end of the walk, against the starry
+sky, stood a towering figure, with bristling feather head-dress, and
+tomahawk poised.
+
+'Oh, please, sir, don't!' he faltered, and shut his eyes, expecting the
+Indian to bound upon him. But when he opened his eyes again, the savage
+was gone! He must have slipped behind a ragged old yew which had once
+been clipped and trimmed to look like a chess-king.
+
+Clarence Tinling tottered on through the shrubbery, which was full of
+terrors. Warriors, stealthy and cruel, lurked behind every rustling
+laurel; far away on the lawn he saw their spears through the tall pampas
+grass; he heard them chirping, clucking, and grunting in every direction
+as they lay in wait for him, until at last he gained the broad gravel
+path, at the end of which--oh, how far away they seemed!--were the
+three lighted windows of the drawing-room. He could see the interior
+quite plainly, and the group round the piano where the shaded lamp made
+a spot of brilliant colour. What were they all doing? Were they huddled
+together, waiting, watching in an agony of suspense? Nothing of the
+kind: it will be scarcely credited, perhaps, but this heartless domestic
+circle were positively passing the time with music, as if nothing were
+happening!
+
+If only he could reach that bright drawing-room before the rush came! He
+felt that there were lithe forms stealing along behind the flower-beds.
+He dared not run, but dragged his heavy feet along the gravel; and then,
+all at once, from the rhododendron bushes rose a wild, unearthly yell.
+He could bear it no longer; he would make one last effort, even if they
+tomahawked him on the very verandah.
+
+Somehow--he never knew how--he found himself in the midst of that quiet
+musical party, wild with terror, scarcely able to speak.
+
+'The Red Indians!' he gasped. 'Don't let them get me! Save me--hide me
+somewhere!' and he remembered afterwards that he made a mad endeavour to
+get inside the piano.
+
+He was instantly surrounded by the astonished family. 'My dear
+Clarence,' said Mrs. Jolliffe, 'you're perfectly safe--you've been
+frightening yourself with your own game. There are no Indians here.'
+
+Another howl from the shrubbery seemed to contradict her. 'There,
+didn't you hear that?' he cried. 'Oh, you won't believe me till it's too
+late! There are hundreds of them round the stockade. They may have
+scalped Jack and Guy by this time!'
+
+'And why ain't you being scalped too?' inquired Uncle Lambert.
+
+'I'm sure you needn't talk!' he retorted; 'you weren't any more anxious
+to fight than I am.'
+
+'But isn't that different? I thought you had fought them before, and
+conquered?'
+
+'Then you thought wrong! Those--those weren't real Indians--I made them
+up, then!'
+
+'Now we've got it!' said Uncle Lambert. 'Well, Master Clarence, you've
+made your little confession, and now it's my turn--_I_ made Yellow
+Vulture up!'
+
+'Are you sure--really sure--on your honour?' he asked eagerly.
+
+'Honest Injun!' said Lambert. 'You see, I began to think the military
+business was getting rather overdone; the army, like Wordsworth's world,
+was "too much with us," and it occurred to me to see whether the
+General's courage would stand an outside test--so I composed that little
+challenge. Yes, you see before you the only Wah Na Sa Pash Boo--no
+others are genuine!'
+
+Tinling felt that those girls were laughing at him; they had probably
+been in the secret for some time; but he could not care much just
+then--the relief was so delicious!
+
+'It was too bad of you, Lambert,' said Mrs. Jolliffe. 'He was really
+horribly frightened, and there are those other two down in the stockade
+all alone--you might have thought of that--they will be half out of
+their minds by this time!'
+
+'My dear Cecilia,' was the reply,'don't be uneasy, I _did_ think of it.
+The moment they begin to feel at all uncomfortable they have directions
+to open a certain packet which explains the whole thing. If the gallant
+General had not been in quite such a hurry, he would have spared himself
+this unpleasant experience.'
+
+'Let's all go down, and see how they're getting on,' said Hazel.
+
+'I know this,' said the General sullenly, 'they were in quite as big a
+funk as I was!'
+
+'Then why didn't they run in, and ask to be hidden too?' inquired
+Hilary.
+
+'Why? Because they didn't dare!' retorted Tinling, boldly.
+
+'You know,' he remarked to Cecily, as they were going down together
+through the warm darkness, 'it's not fair of your uncle to play these
+tricks on fellows.'
+
+'Perhaps it isn't quite,' said Cecily, impartially; 'but then he didn't
+_begin_, did he?'
+
+'Ahoy!' shouted Uncle Lambert, as they neared the stockade, and he was
+answered by a ringing cheer from the fortress.
+
+'Come on--we ain't afraid of you! Don't skulk there--see what you'll
+get!' And a volley of peas, corks, and small shot flew about their ears.
+
+Lambert Jolliffe ran forward: 'Hi, stop that! spare our lives!' he
+cried, laughing. 'Jack, you young rascal, put down that confounded
+popgun--can't you see we're not Red Indians?'
+
+'What, is it you, uncle?' said Guy, in a rather crestfallen tone. 'Where
+are the Red Indians then?'
+
+'They had to go up to town to see their dentist. But do you mean to say
+you haven't opened my envelope after all?'
+
+'I thought you told us it was only in case we got frightened?' said
+Jack.
+
+'What does the General say to _that_?' cried Lambert--but Clarence
+Tinling was nowhere to be found. He had slipped off to his bedroom, and
+the next morning he announced at breakfast that he 'thought his people
+would be wanting him at home.'
+
+So the army was disbanded, for there was a general disarmament, and on
+the afternoon after Tinling's departure the entire Jolliffe family
+engaged in a grand cricket match, when lazy Uncle Lambert came out
+unexpectedly strong as an overhand bowler.
+
+
+
+
+_SHUT OUT_
+
+
+It is towards the end of an afternoon in December, and Wilfred Rolleston
+is walking along a crowded London street with his face turned westward.
+A few moments ago and he was scarcely conscious of where he was or where
+he meant to go: he was walking on mechanically in a heavy stupor,
+through which there stole a haunting sense of degradation and despair
+that tortured him dully. And suddenly, as if by magic, this has
+vanished: he seems to himself to have waked from a miserable day dream
+to the buoyant consciousness of youth and hope. Temperaments which are
+subject to fits of heavy and causeless depression have their
+compensations sometimes in the reaction which follows; the infesting
+cares, as in Longfellow's poem, 'fold their tents, like the Arabs, and
+as silently steal away,' and with their retreat comes an exquisite
+exhilaration which more equable dispositions can never experience.
+
+Is this so with Rolleston now? He only knows that the cloud has lifted
+from his brain, and that in the clear sunshine which bursts upon him now
+he can look his sorrows in the face and know that there is nothing so
+terrible in them after all.
+
+It is true that he is not happy at the big City day school which he has
+just left. How should he be? He is dull and crabbed and uncouth, and
+knows too well that he is an object of general dislike; no one there
+cares to associate with him, and he makes no attempt to overcome their
+prejudices, being perfectly aware that they are different from him, and
+hating them for it, but hating himself, perhaps, the most.
+
+And though all his evenings are spent at home there is little rest for
+him even there, for the work for the next day must be prepared; and he
+sits over it till late, sometimes with desperate efforts to master the
+difficulties, but more often staring at the page before him with eyes
+that are almost wilfully vacant.
+
+All this has been and is enough in itself to account for the gloomy
+state into which he had sunk. But--and how could he have forgotten
+it?--it is over for the present.
+
+To-night he will not have to sit up struggling with the tasks which will
+only cover him with fresh disgrace on the morrow; for a whole month he
+need not think of them, nor of the classes in which the hand of everyone
+is against him. For the holidays have begun; to-day has been the last of
+the term. Is there no reason for joy and thankfulness in that? What a
+fool he has been to let those black thoughts gain such a hold over him!
+
+Slowly, more as if it had all happened a long time ago instead of quite
+recently, the incidents of the morning come back to him, vivid and clear
+once more--morning chapel and the Doctor's sermon, and afterwards the
+pretence of work and relaxed discipline in the class rooms, when the
+results of the examinations had been read out, with the names of the
+boys who had gained prizes and their remove to the form above. He had
+come out last of course, but no one expected anything else from him; a
+laugh had gone round the desks when his humble total closed the list,
+and he had joined in it to show them he didn't care. And then the class
+had been dismissed, and there had been friendly good-byes, arrangements
+for walking home in company or for meeting during the holidays--for all
+but him; he had gone out alone--and the dull blankness had come over him
+from which he has only just recovered.
+
+But, for the present at all events, he has got rid of it completely; he
+is going home, where at least he is not despised, where he will find a
+sanctuary from gibes and jostlings and impositions; and the longer he
+thinks of this the higher his spirits rise, and he steps briskly, with a
+kind of exultation, until the people he passes in the streets turn and
+look at him, struck by his expression. 'They can see how jolly I'm
+feeling,' he thinks with a smile.
+
+The dusk is falling, and the shops he passes are brilliant with lights
+and decorations, but he does not stop to look at any of them; his mind
+is busy with settling how he shall employ himself on this the first
+evening of his liberty, the first for so long on which he could feel his
+own master.
+
+At first he decides to read. Is there not some book he had begun and
+meant to finish, so many days ago now that he has even forgotten what it
+was all about, and only remembers that it was exciting?
+
+And yet, he thinks, he won't read to-night--not on the very first night
+of the holidays. Quite lately--yesterday or the day before--his mother
+had spoken to him, gently but very seriously, about what she called the
+morose and savage fits which would bring misery upon him if he did not
+set himself earnestly to overcome them.
+
+And there were times, he knew, when it seemed as if a demon possessed
+him and drove him to wound even those who loved him and whom he
+loved--times when their affection only roused in him some hideous spirit
+of sullen contradiction.
+
+He feels softened now somehow, and has a new longing for the love he has
+so often harshly repulsed. He _will_ overcome this sulkiness of his; he
+will begin this very evening; as soon as he gets home he will tell his
+mother that he is sorry, that he does love her really, only that when
+these fits come on him he hardly knows what he says or does.
+
+And she will forgive him, only too gladly; and his mind will be quite at
+ease again. No, not quite; there is still something he must do before
+that: he has a vague recollection of a long-standing coolness between
+himself and his younger brother, Lionel. They never have got on very
+well together; Lionel is so different--much cleverer even already, for
+one thing; better looking too, and better tempered. Whatever they
+quarrelled about Wilfred is very sure that he was the offender; Lionel
+never begins that kind of thing. But he will put himself in the right at
+once, and ask Lionel to make friends again; he will consent readily
+enough--he always does.
+
+And then he has a bright idea: he will take his brother some little
+present to prove that he really wishes to behave decently for the
+future. What shall he buy?
+
+He finds himself near a large toy shop at the time, and in the window
+are displayed several regiments of brightly coloured tin warriors--the
+very thing! Lionel is still young enough to delight in them.
+
+Feeling in his pockets, Rolleston discovers more loose silver than he
+had thought he possessed, and so he goes into the shop and asks for one
+of the boxes of soldiers. He is served by one of two neatly dressed
+female assistants, who stare and giggle at one another at his first
+words, finding it odd, perhaps, that a fellow of his age should buy
+toys--as if, he thinks indignantly, they couldn't see that it was not
+for _himself_ he wanted the things.
+
+But he goes on, feeling happier after his purchase. They will see now
+that he is not so bad after all. It is long since he has felt such a
+craving to be thought well of by somebody.
+
+A little farther on he comes to a row of people, mostly women and
+tradesmen's boys, standing on the curb stone opposite a man who is
+seated in a little wooden box on wheels drawn up close to the pavement.
+He is paralytic and blind, with a pinched white face framed in an
+old-fashioned fur cap with big ear lappets; he seems to be preaching or
+reading, and Rolleston stops idly enough to listen for a few moments,
+the women making room for him with alacrity, and the boys staring
+curiously round at the new arrival with a grin.
+
+He hardly pays much attention to this; he is listening to the poem which
+the man in the box is reciting with a nasal and metallic snuffle in his
+voice:
+
+
+     There's a harp _and_ a crown,
+       For you and _for_ me,
+     Hanging on the boughs
+       Of that Christmas tree!
+
+
+He hears, and then hurries on again, repeating the stanza mechanically
+to himself, without seeing anything particularly ludicrous about it. The
+words have reminded him of that Christmas party at the Gordons', next
+door. Did not Ethel Gordon ask him particularly to come, and did he not
+refuse her sullenly? What a brute he was to treat her like that! If she
+were to ask him again, he thinks he would not say no, though he does
+hate parties.
+
+Ethel is a dear girl, and never seems to think him good-for-nothing, as
+most people do. Perhaps it is sham though--no, he can't think that when
+he remembers how patiently and kindly she has borne with his senseless
+fits of temper and tried to laugh away his gloom.
+
+Not every girl as pretty as Ethel is would care to notice him, and
+persist in it in spite of everything; yet he has sulked with her of
+late. Was it because she had favoured Lionel? He is ashamed to think
+that this may have been the reason.
+
+Never mind, that is all over now; he will start clear with everybody. He
+will ask Ethel, too, to forgive him. Is there nothing he can do to
+please her? Yes some time ago she had asked him to draw something for
+her. (He detests drawing lessons, but he has rather a taste for drawing
+things out of his own head.) He had told her, not too civilly, that he
+had work enough without doing drawings for girls. He will paint her
+something to-night as a surprise; he will begin as soon as tea is
+cleared away; it will be more sociable than reading a book.
+
+And then already he sees a vision of the warm little panelled room, and
+himself getting out his colour-box and sitting down to paint by
+lamp-light--for any light does for his kind of colouring--while his
+mother sits opposite and Lionel watches the picture growing under his
+hand.
+
+What shall he draw? He gets quite absorbed in thinking over this; his
+own tastes run in a gory direction, but perhaps Ethel, being a girl, may
+not care for battles or desperate duels. A compromise strikes him; he
+will draw a pirate ship: that will be first rate, with the black flag
+flying on the mainmast, and the pirate captain on the poop scouring the
+ocean with a big glass in search of merchantmen; all about the deck and
+rigging he can put the crew, with red caps, and belts stuck full of
+pistols and daggers.
+
+And on the right there shall be a bit of the pirate island, with a mast
+and another black flag--he knows he will enjoy picking out the skull and
+cross-bones in thick Chinese white--and then, if there is room, he will
+add a cannon, and perhaps a palm tree. A pirate island always has palm
+trees.
+
+He is so full of this projected picture of his that he is quite
+surprised to find that he is very near the square where he lives; but
+here, just in front of him, at the end of the narrow lane, is the
+public-house with the coach and four engraved on the ground glass of the
+lower part of the window, and above it the bottles full of coloured
+water.
+
+And here is the greengrocer's. How long is it since it was a
+barber's?--surely a very little time. And there is the bootmaker's, with
+its outside display of dangling shoes, and the row of naked gas jets
+blown to pale blue specks and whistling red tongues by turns as a gust
+sweeps across them.
+
+This is his home, this little dingy, old-fashioned red-brick house at an
+angle of the square, with a small paved space railed in before it. He
+pushes open the old gate with the iron arch above, where an oil-lamp
+used to hang, and hurries up to the door with the heavy shell-shaped
+porch, impatient to get to the warmth and light which await him within.
+
+The bell has got out of order, for only a faint jangle comes from below
+as he rings; he waits a little and then pulls the handle again, more
+sharply this time, and still no one comes.
+
+When Betty does think proper to come up and open the door he will tell
+her that it is too bad keeping a fellow standing out here, in the fog
+and cold, all this time.... She is coming at last--no, it was fancy; it
+seems as if Betty had slipped out for something, and perhaps the cook is
+upstairs, and his mother may be dozing by the fire, as she has begun to
+do of late.
+
+Losing all patience, he gropes for the knocker, and, groping in vain,
+begins to hammer with bare fists on the door, louder and louder, until
+he is interrupted by a rough voice from the railings behind him.
+
+'Now then, what are you up to there, eh?' says the voice, which belongs
+to a burly policeman who has stopped suspiciously on the pavement.
+
+'Why,' says Rolleston, 'I want to get in, and I can't make them hear me.
+I wish you'd try what you can do, will you?'
+
+The policeman comes slowly in to the gate. 'I dessay,' he says
+jocularly. 'Is there anythink else? Come, suppose you move on.'
+
+A curious kind of dread of he knows not what begins to creep over
+Wilfred at this.
+
+'Move on?' he cries, '_why_ should I move on? This is my house; don't
+you see? I live here.'
+
+'Now look 'ere, my joker, I don't want a job over this,' says the
+constable, stolidly. 'You'll bring a crowd round in another minute if
+you keep on that 'ammering.'
+
+'Mind your own business,' says the other with growing excitement.
+
+'That's what you'll make me do if you don't look out,' is the retort.
+'Will you move on before I make you?'
+
+'But, I say,' protests Rolleston, 'I'm not joking; I give you my word
+I'm not. I do live here. Why, I've just come back from school, and I
+can't get in.'
+
+'Pretty school _you_ come from!' growls the policeman; ''andles on to
+_your_ lesson books, if _I_ knows anything. 'Ere, out you go!'
+
+Rolleston's fear increases. 'I won't! I won't!' he cries frantically,
+and rushing back to the door beats upon it wildly. On the other side of
+it are love and shelter, and it will not open to him. He is cold and
+hungry and tired after his walk; why do they keep him out like this?
+
+'Mother!' he calls hoarsely. 'Can't you hear me, mother? It's Wilfred;
+let me in!'
+
+The other takes him, not roughly, by the shoulder. 'Now you take my
+advice,' he says. 'You ain't quite yourself; you're making a mistake. I
+don't want to get you in trouble if you don't force me to it. Drop this
+'ere tomfool game and go home quiet to wherever it is you _do_ live.'
+
+'I tell you I live here, you fool!' shrieks Wilfred, in deadly terror
+lest he should be forced away before the door is opened.
+
+'And I tell you you don't do nothing of the sort,' says the policeman,
+beginning to lose his temper. 'No one don't live 'ere, nor ain't done
+not since I've bin on the beat. Use your eyes if you're not too far
+gone.'
+
+For the first time Rolleston seems to see things plainly as they are; he
+glances round the square--that is just as it always is on foggy winter
+evenings, with its central enclosure a shadowy black patch against a
+reddish glimmer, beyond which the lighted windows of the houses make
+yellow bars of varying length and tint.
+
+But this house, his own--why, it is all shuttered and dark; some of the
+window panes are broken; there is a pale grey patch in one that looks
+like a dingy bill; the knocker has been unscrewed from the door, and on
+its scraped panels someone has scribbled words and rough caricatures
+that were surely not there when he left that morning.
+
+Can anything--any frightful disaster--have come in that short time? No,
+he will not think of it; he will not let himself be terrified, all for
+nothing.
+
+'Now, are you goin'?' says the policeman after a pause.
+
+Rolleston puts his back against the door and clings to the sides. 'No!'
+he shouts. 'I don't care what you say; I don't believe you: they are all
+in there--they are, I tell you, they are--they _are_!'
+
+In a second he is in the constable's strong grasp and being dragged,
+struggling violently, to the gate, when a soft voice, a woman's,
+intercedes for him.
+
+'What is the matter? Oh, don't--don't be so rough with him, poor
+creature!' it cries pitifully.
+
+'I'm only exercisin' my duty, mum,' says the officer; 'he wants to
+create a disturbance 'ere.'
+
+'No,' cries Wilfred, 'he lies! I only want to get into my own house, and
+no one seems to hear me. _You_ don't think anything is the matter, do
+you?'
+
+It is a lady who has been pleading for him; as he wrests himself from
+his captor and comes forward she sees his face, and her own grows white
+and startled.
+
+'Wilfred!' she exclaims.
+
+'Why, you know my name!' he says. 'Then you can tell him it's all
+right. Do I know you? You speak like--is it--_Ethel_?'
+
+'Yes,' she says, and her voice is low and trembling, 'I am Ethel.'
+
+He is silent for an instant; then he says slowly, 'You are not the
+same--nothing is the same: it is all changed--changed--and oh, my God,
+what am _I_?'
+
+Slowly the truth is borne in upon his brain, muddled and disordered by
+long excess, and the last shred of the illusion which had possessed him
+drifts away.
+
+He knows now that his boyhood, with such possibilities of happiness as
+it had ever held, has gone for ever. He has been knocking at a door
+which will open for him never again, and the mother by whose side his
+evening was to have been passed died long long years ago.
+
+The past, blotted out completely for an hour by some freak of the
+memory, comes back to him, and he sees his sullen, morbid boyhood
+changing into something worse still, until by slow degrees he became
+what he is now--dissipated, degraded, lost.
+
+At first the shock, the awful loneliness he awakes to, and the shame of
+being found thus by the woman for whom he had felt the only pure love he
+had known, overwhelm him utterly, and he leans his head upon his arms as
+he clutches the railings, and sobs with a grief that is terrible in its
+utter abandonment.
+
+The very policeman is silent and awed by what he feels to be a scene
+from the human tragedy, though he may not be able to describe it to
+himself by any more suitable phrase than 'a rum start.'
+
+'You can go now, policeman,' says the lady, putting money in his hand.
+'You see I know this--this gentleman. Leave him to me; he will give you
+no trouble now.'
+
+And the constable goes, taking care, however, to keep an eye
+occasionally on the corner where this has taken place. He has not gone
+long before Rolleston raises his head with a husky laugh: his manner has
+changed now; he is no longer the boy in thought and expression that he
+was a short time before, and speaks as might be expected from his
+appearance.
+
+'I remember it all now,' he says. 'You are Ethel Gordon, of course you
+are, and you wouldn't have anything to do with me--and quite right
+too--and then you married my brother Lionel. You see I'm as clear as a
+bell again now. So you came up and found me battering at the old door,
+eh? Do you know, I got the fancy I was a boy again and coming home
+to--bah, what does all that matter? Odd sort of fancy though, wasn't it?
+Drink is always playing me some cursed trick now. A pretty fool I must
+have made of myself!'
+
+She says nothing, and he thrusts his hands deep in his ragged pockets.
+'Hallo! what's this I've got?' he says, as he feels something at the
+bottom of one of them, and, bringing out the box of soldiers he had
+bought half an hour before, he holds it up with a harsh laugh which has
+the ring of despair in it.
+
+'Do you see this?' he says to her. 'You'll laugh when I tell you it's a
+toy I bought just now for--guess whom--for your dear husband! Must have
+been pretty bad, mustn't I? Shall I give it to you to take to him--no?
+Well, perhaps he has outgrown such things now, so here goes!' and he
+pitches the box over the railings, and it falls with a shiver of broken
+glass as the pieces of painted tin rattle out upon the flag-stones.
+
+'And now I'll wish you good evening,' he says, sweeping off his battered
+hat with mock courtesy.
+
+She tries to keep him back. 'No, Wilfred, no; you must not go like that.
+We live here still, Lionel and I, in the same old house,' and she
+indicates the house next door; 'he will be home very soon. Will you'
+(she cannot help a little shudder at the thought of such a guest)--'will
+you come in and wait for him?'
+
+'Throw myself into his arms, eh?' he says. 'How delighted he would be!
+I'm just the sort of brother to be a credit to a highly respectable
+young barrister like him. You really think he'd like it? No; it's all
+right, Ethel; don't be alarmed: I was only joking. I shall never come in
+your way, I promise you. I'm just going to take myself off.'
+
+'Don't say that,' she says (in spite of herself she feels relieved);
+'tell me--is there nothing we can do--no help we can give you?'
+
+'Nothing,' he answers fiercely; 'I don't want your pity. Do you think I
+can't see that you wouldn't touch me with the tongs if you could help
+it? It's too late to snivel over me now, and I'm well enough as I am.
+You leave me alone to go to the devil my own way; it's all I ask of you.
+Good-bye. It's Christmas, isn't it? I haven't dreamed _that_ at all
+events. Well, I wish you and Lionel as merry a Christmas as I mean to
+have. I can't say more than that in the way of enjoyment.'
+
+He turns on his heel at the last words and slouches off down the narrow
+lane by which he had come. Ethel Rolleston stands for a while, looking
+after his receding form till the fog closes round it and she can see it
+no more. She feels as if she had seen a ghost; and for her at least the
+enclosure before the deserted house next door will be haunted
+evermore--haunted by a forlorn and homeless figure sobbing there by the
+railings.
+
+As for the man, he goes on his way until he finds a door
+which--alas!--is not closed against him.
+
+
+
+
+_TOMMY'S HERO_
+
+A STORY FOR SMALL BOYS
+
+
+It was the night after Tommy had been taken to his first pantomime, and
+he had been lying asleep in his little bedroom (for now that he was nine
+he slept in the night nursery no longer); he had been asleep, when he
+was suddenly awakened by a brilliant red glare. At first he was afraid
+the house was on fire, but when the red turned to a dazzling green, he
+gave a great gasp of delight, for he thought the transformation scene
+was still going on. 'And there's all the best part still to come,' he
+said to himself.
+
+But as he became wider awake, he saw that it was out of the question to
+expect his bedroom to hold all those wonders, and he was almost
+surprised to see that there was even so much as a single fairy in it. A
+fairy there was, nevertheless; she stood there with a star in her hair,
+and her dress shimmering out all around her, just as he had seen her a
+few hours before, when she rose up, with little jerks, inside a great
+gilded shell, and spoke some poetry, which he didn't quite catch.
+
+She spoke audibly enough now, nor was her voice so squeaky as it had
+sounded before. 'Little boy,' she began, 'I am the ruling genius of
+Pantomime Fairyland. You entered my kingdom for the first time last
+night--how did you enjoy yourself?'
+
+'Oh,' said Tommy, '_so_ much; it was splendid, thank you!'
+
+She smiled and seemed well pleased. 'I always call to inquire on a new
+acquaintance,' she said. 'And so you liked our realms, as every sensible
+boy does? Well, Tommy, it is in my power to reward you; every night for
+a certain time you shall see again the things you liked best. What _did_
+you like best?'
+
+'The clown part,' said Tommy, promptly.
+
+For it ought to be said here that he was a boy who had always had a
+leaning to the kind of practical fun which he saw carried out by the
+clown to a pitch of perfection which at once enchanted and humbled him.
+Till that harlequinade, he had thought himself a funny boy in his way,
+and it had surprised him that his family had not found him more amusing
+than they did; but now he felt all at once that he was only a very
+humble beginner, and had never understood what real fun was.
+
+For he had not soared much above hiding behind doors, and popping out
+suddenly on a passing servant, causing her to 'jump' delightfully; once,
+indeed, he used to be able to 'sell' his family by pretending all
+manner of calamities, but they had grown so stupid lately that they
+never believed a single word he said.
+
+No, the clown would not own him as a follower: he would despise his
+little attempts at practical jokes. 'Still,' thought Tommy, 'I can try
+to be more like him; perhaps he will come to hear of me some day!'
+
+For he had never met anyone he admired half so much as that clown, who
+was always in a good temper (to be sure he had everything his own
+way--but then he deserved to), always quick and ready with his excuses;
+and if he did run away in times of danger, it was not because he was
+really afraid! Then how deliciously impudent he was to shopkeepers! Who
+but he would have dared to cheapen a large fish by making a door mat of
+it, or to ask the prices of cheeses on purpose to throw mud at them? Not
+that he couldn't be serious when he chose--for once he unfurled a Union
+Jack and said something quite noble, which made everybody clap their
+hands for two minutes; and he told people the best shops to go to for a
+quantity of things, and he could not have been joking _then_, for they
+were the same names that were to be seen on all the hoardings.
+
+This will explain how it was natural that Tommy, on being asked which
+part of the pantomime he preferred, should say, without the slightest
+hesitation, 'Oh, the _clown_ part!'
+
+The fairy seemed less pleased. 'The clown part!' she repeated. 'What,
+those shop scenes tacked on right at the end without rhyme or reason?'
+
+'Yes,' said Tommy, 'those ones!'
+
+'And the great wood with the shifting green and violet lights, and the
+white bands of fairies dancing in circles--didn't you like them?'
+
+'Oh yes,' said the candid Tommy; 'pretty well. I didn't care much for
+them.'
+
+'Well,' she said, 'but you liked the grand processions, with all their
+gorgeous dresses and monstrous figures, surely you liked _them_?'
+
+'There was such a lot of it,' said Tommy. 'The clown was the best.'
+
+'And if you could, you'd rather see those last scenes again than all the
+rest?' she said, frowning a little.
+
+'Oh, wouldn't I just!' said Tommy; 'but may I--really and truly?'
+
+'I see you are not one of _my_ boys,' said the Genius of Pantomime,
+rather sadly. 'It so happens that those closing scenes are the very ones
+I have least control over--they are a part of my kingdom which has
+fallen into sad decay and rebellion. But one thing, O Tommy, I _can_ do
+for you. I will give you the clown for a friend and companion--and much
+good may he do you!'
+
+'But would he _come_?' he asked, hardly daring to believe in such
+condescension.
+
+'He must, if _I_ bid him; it is for you to make him feel comfortable
+and at home with you;--the longer you can keep him the better I shall be
+pleased.'
+
+'Oh, _how_ kind of you!' he cried; 'he shall stay all the holidays. I'd
+rather have him than anybody else. What fun we shall have--what fun!'
+
+The green fire faded out and the fairy with it. He must have fallen
+asleep again, for, when he opened his eyes, there was the clown at the
+foot of his bed making a face.
+
+''Ullo!' said the clown; 'I say, are you the nice little boy I was told
+to come and stay with?'
+
+'Yes, yes,' said Tommy; 'I am so glad to see you. I'm just going to get
+up.'
+
+'I know you are,' said the clown, and upset him out of bed into the cold
+bath.
+
+This he could not help thinking a little bit unkind of the clown on such
+a cold morning, particularly as he followed it up by throwing a
+hair-brush, two pieces of soap, and a pair of shoes at him before he
+could get out again.
+
+But it woke him, at all events, and he ventured (with great respect) to
+throw one of the shoes back; it just grazed the clown's top-knot.
+
+To Tommy's alarm, the clown set up a hullaballoo as if he was mortally
+injured.
+
+'You cruel, unkind little boy,' he sobbed, 'to play so rough with a poor
+clown!'
+
+'But you threw them at me first,' pleaded Tommy, 'and much harder,
+too!'
+
+'I'm the oldest,' said the clown, 'and you've got to make me feel at
+home, or I shall go away again.'
+
+'I won't do it again, and I'm very sorry,' pleaded Tommy; but the clown
+wouldn't be friends with him for ever so long, and was only appeased at
+last by being allowed to put Tommy upside down in a tall wicker basket
+which stood in a corner.
+
+Then he helped Tommy to dress by buttoning all his clothes the wrong
+way, and hiding his stockings and necktie. While he was doing this,
+Sarah, the under-nurse, came in, and he strutted up to her and began to
+dance quietly. 'Go away, imperence,' said Sarah.
+
+'Beautiful gal,' said the clown (though Sarah was extremely plain), 'I
+love yer!' and he put out his tongue and wagged his head at her until
+she ran out of the room in terror.
+
+He looked so absurd that Tommy was delighted with him again, and yet,
+when the bell rang for breakfast, he felt obliged to give his new friend
+a hint.
+
+'I say,' he said, 'you don't mind my telling you--but mother's very
+particular about manners at table;' but the clown relieved him instantly
+by saying that so was he--_very_ particular; and he slid down the
+banisters and turned somersaults in the hall until Tommy joined him.
+
+'I do hope father and mother won't be unkind to him,' he thought, as he
+went in, 'because he does seem to feel things so.'
+
+But nothing could be more polite than the welcome Tommy's parents gave
+the stranger, as he came in, bowing very low, and making a queer little
+skipping step. Tommy's mother said she was always glad to see any friend
+of her boy's, while his father begged the clown to make himself quite at
+home. All _he_ said was, 'I'm disgusted to make your acquaintance;' but
+he certainly made himself at home--in fact, he was not quite so
+particular about his manners as he had led Tommy to expect.
+
+He volunteered to divide the sausages and bacon himself, and did so in
+such a way that everybody else got very little and he himself got a
+great deal. If it had been anybody else, Tommy would certainly have
+called this 'piggish'; as it was, he tried to think it was all fun, and
+that he himself had no particular appetite.
+
+His cousin Barbara, a little girl of about his own age, was staying with
+them just then, and came down presently to breakfast. 'Oh, my!' said the
+clown, laying a great red hand on his heart, 'what a nice little gal you
+are, ain't yer? Come and sit by me, my dear!'
+
+'No, thank you; I'm going to sit by Aunt Mary,' she replied, looking
+rather shy and surprised.
+
+'Allow me, missy,' he persisted, 'to pass you the strawberry-jam and
+the muffins!'
+
+'I'll have some jam, thank you,' she replied.
+
+He looked round and chuckled. 'Oh, I say; that little gal said "thank
+you" before she got it!' he exclaimed. 'There ain't no muffins, and I've
+eaten all the jam!' which made Tommy choke with laughter.
+
+Barbara flushed. 'That's a very stupid joke,' she pronounced severely,
+'and rude, too; it's a pity you weren't taught to behave better when you
+were young.'
+
+'So I was!' said the clown, with his mouth full.
+
+'Then you've forgotten it,' she said; 'you're nothing but a big baby,
+that you are!'
+
+'Yah!' retorted the clown; 'so are _you_ a big baby!' which, as even
+Tommy saw, was not a very brilliant reply. It was a singular fact about
+the clown that the slightest check seemed to take away all his
+brilliancy.
+
+'You know you're not telling the truth now,' said Barbara, so
+contemptuously, that the clown began to weep bitterly. 'She says I don't
+speak the truth!' he complained, 'and she _knows_ it will be my aunt's
+birthday last Toosday!'
+
+'You great silly thing, what has that to do with it?' cried Barbara,
+indignantly. 'What _is_ there to cry about?' which very nearly made
+Tommy quarrel with her, for why couldn't she be polite to _his_ friend?
+
+However, the clown soon dried his eyes on the tablecloth, and recovered
+his cheerfulness; and presently he noticed the _Times_ lying folded by
+Tommy's papa's plate.
+
+'Oh, I say, mister,' he said, 'shall I air the newspaper for yer?'
+
+'Thank you, if you will,' was the polite reply.
+
+He shook it all out in one great sheet and wrapped it round him, and
+waddled about in it until Tommy nearly rolled off his seat with delight.
+
+'When you've _quite_ done with it----' his father was saying mildly, as
+the clown made a great hole in the middle and thrust his head out of it
+with a bland smile.
+
+'I'm only just looking through it,' he explained; 'you can have it now,'
+and he rolled it up in a tight ball and threw it at his host's head.
+
+Breakfast was certainly not such a dull meal as usual that morning,
+Tommy thought; but he wished his people would show a little more
+appreciation, instead of sitting there all stiff and surprised; he was
+afraid the clown would feel discouraged.
+
+When his papa undid the ball, the paper was found to be torn into long
+strips, which delighted Tommy; but his father, on the other hand, seemed
+annoyed, possibly because it was not so easy to read in that form.
+Meanwhile, the clown busied himself in emptying the butter-dish into his
+pockets, and this did shock the boy a little, for he knew it was not
+polite to pocket things at meals, and wondered how he could be so nasty.
+
+Breakfast was over at last, and the clown took Tommy's arm and walked
+upstairs to the first floor with him.
+
+'Who's in there?' he asked, as they passed the spare bedroom.
+
+'Granny,' said the boy; 'she's staying with us; only she always has
+breakfast in her room, you know.'
+
+'Why, you don't mean to say you've got a granny!' cried the clown, with
+joy; 'you are a nice little boy; now we'll have some fun with her.'
+Tommy felt doubtful whether she could be induced to join them so early
+in the morning, and said so. 'You knock, and say you've got a present
+for her if she'll come out,' suggested the clown.
+
+'But I haven't,' objected Tommy; 'wouldn't that be a story?' He had
+unaccountably forgotten his old fondness for 'sells.'
+
+'Of course it would,' said the clown; 'I'm always a tellin' of 'em, I
+am.'
+
+Tommy was shocked once more, as he realised that his friend was not a
+_truthful_ clown. But he knocked at the door, nevertheless, and asked
+his grandmother to come out and see a friend of his.
+
+'Wait one minute, my boy,' she answered, 'and I'll come out.'
+
+Tommy was surprised to see his companion preparing to lie, face
+downwards, on the mat just outside the door.
+
+'Get up,' he said; 'you'll trip grandma up if you stay there.'
+
+'That's what I'm doing it for, stoopid,' said the clown.
+
+'But it will hurt her,' he cried.
+
+'Nothing hurts old women,' said the clown; 'I've tripped up 'undreds of
+'em, and I ought to know.'
+
+'Well, you shan't trip up my granny, anyhow,' said Tommy, stoutly; for
+he was not a bad-hearted boy, and his grandmother had given him a
+splendid box of soldiers on Christmas Day. 'Don't come out, granny; it's
+a mistake,' he shouted.
+
+The clown rose with a look of disgust.
+
+'Do you call this actin' like a friend to me?' he demanded.
+
+'Well,' said Tommy, apologetically, 'she's my granny, you see.'
+
+'She ain't _my_ granny, and, if she was, I'd let you trip her up, I
+would; _I_ ain't selfish. I shan't stop with you any longer.'
+
+'Oh, do,' said Tommy; 'we'll go and play somewhere else.'
+
+'Well,' said the clown, relenting, 'if you're a good boy you shall see
+me make a butter-slide in the hall.'
+
+Then Tommy saw how he had wronged him in thinking he had pocketed the
+butter out of mere greediness, and he felt ashamed and penitent; the
+clown made a beautiful slide, though Tommy wished he would not insist
+upon putting all the butter that was left down his back.
+
+'There's a ring at the bell,' said the clown; 'I'll open the door, and
+you hide and see the fun.'
+
+So Tommy hid himself round a corner as the door opened.
+
+'Walk in, sir,' said the clown, politely.
+
+'Master Tommy in?' said a jolly, hearty voice. It was dear old Uncle
+John, who had taken him to the pantomime the night before. 'I thought
+I'd look in and see if he would care to come with me to the
+Crystal----oh!' And there was a scuffling noise and a heavy bump.
+
+Tommy ran out, full of remorse. Uncle John was sitting on the tiles
+rubbing his head, and, oddly enough, did not look at all funny.
+
+'Oh, uncle,' cried the boy, 'you're not hurt? I didn't know it was you!'
+
+'I'm a bit shaken, my boy, that's all,' said his uncle; 'one doesn't
+come down like a feather at my age.' And he picked himself slowly up.
+'Well, I must get home again,' he said; 'no Crystal Palace to-day,
+Tommy, after this. Good-bye.'
+
+And he went slowly out, leaving Tommy with the feeling that he had had
+enough of slides. He even wiped the flooring clean again with a
+waterproof and the clothes-brush, though the clown (who had been hiding)
+tried to prevent him.
+
+'We ain't 'ad 'arf the fun out of it yet!' he complained (he always
+spoke in rather a common way, as Tommy began to notice with pain).
+
+'I've had enough,' said Tommy. 'It was my Uncle John who slipped down
+that time, and he's hurt, and he'd come to take me to the Crystal
+Palace!'
+
+'Well, he hadn't come to take _me_,' said the clown; 'you are stingy
+about your relations, you are; you ain't 'arf a boy for a bit o' fun.'
+
+Tommy felt this rebuke very much, he had hoped so to gain the clown's
+esteem; but he would not give in, he only suggested humbly that they
+should go up into the play-room.
+
+The play-room was at the top of the house, and Barbara and two little
+sisters of Tommy's were playing there when they came in, the clown
+turning in his toes and making awful faces.
+
+The two little girls ran into a corner, and seemed considerably
+frightened by the stranger's appearance, but Barbara reassured them.
+
+'Don't take any notice,' she said, 'it's only a horrid friend of
+Tommy's. He won't interfere with _us_.'
+
+'Oh, Barbara,' the boy protested, 'he's awfully nice if you only knew
+him. He can make you laugh. Do let us play with you. He wants to, and he
+won't be rough.'
+
+'Do,' pleaded the clown, 'I'll behave so pretty!'
+
+'Well,' said Barbara, 'mind you do, then, or you shan't stop.'
+
+And for a little while he did behave himself. Tommy showed him his new
+soldiers, and he seemed quite interested; and then he had a ride on the
+rocking horse, and was sorry when it broke down under him; and after
+that he came suddenly upon a beautiful doll which belonged to the
+youngest sister.
+
+'Do let me nurse it,' he said, and the little girl gave it up timidly.
+Of course he nursed it the wrong way up, and at last he forgot, and sat
+down on it, the head, which was wax, being crushed to pieces!
+
+Tommy was in fits of laughter at the droll face he made as he held out
+the crushed doll at arm's length, and looked at it with one eye shut,
+exclaiming, 'Poor thing! what a pity! I do 'ope I 'aven't made its 'ead
+ache!'
+
+But the two little girls were crying bitterly in one another's arms, and
+Barbara turned on the clown with tremendous indignation.
+
+'You did it on purpose, you know you did!' she said.
+
+'Go away, little girl; don't talk to me!' said the clown, putting Tommy
+in front of him.
+
+'Tommy,' she said, 'what did you bring your friend up here for? He only
+spoils everything he's allowed to touch. Take him away!'
+
+'Barbara,' pleaded Tommy, 'he's a _visitor_, you know!'
+
+'I don't care,' she replied. 'Mr. Clown, you shan't stay here; this is
+our room, and we don't want you. Go away!' She walked towards him
+looking so fierce that he backed hastily. 'Go downstairs,' she said,
+pointing to the door. 'You, too, Tommy, for you encouraged him!'
+
+'Nyah, nyah, nyah!' said the clown, a sound by which he intended to
+imitate her anger. 'Oh, please, I'm going; remember me to your mother.'
+And he left the room, followed rather sadly by Tommy, who felt that
+Barbara was angry with him. 'That's a very disagribble little girl,'
+remarked the clown, confidentially, when they were safe outside, and
+Tommy thought it wiser to agree.
+
+'What have you got in your pockets?' he asked, presently, seeing a hard
+bulge in his friend's white trunks.
+
+'Only some o' your nice soldiers,' said the clown, and walked into the
+schoolroom, where there was a fire burning. 'Are they brave?' he asked.
+
+'Very,' said Tommy, who had quite persuaded himself that this was so.
+'Look here, we'll have a battle.' He thought a battle would keep the
+clown quiet. 'Here's two cannon and peas, and you shall be the French
+and I'll be English.'
+
+'All right,' said the clown, and took his share of the soldiers and
+calmly put them all in the middle of the red-hot coals. 'I want to be
+quite sure they can stand fire first,' he explained; and then, as they
+melted, he said, 'There, you see, they're all running away. I never see
+such cowards.'
+
+Tommy was in a great rage, and could almost have cried, if it had not
+been babyish, for they were his best regiments which he could see
+dropping down in great glittering stars on the ashes below. 'That's a
+caddish thing to do,' he said, with difficulty; 'I didn't give them to
+you to put in the fire!'
+
+'Oh, I thought you did,' said the clown, 'I beg your pardon;' and he
+threw the rest after them as he spoke.
+
+'You're a beast!' cried Tommy, indignantly; 'I've done with you, after
+this.'
+
+'Oh, no, yer ain't,' he returned.
+
+'I have, though,' said Tommy; 'we're not friends any longer.'
+
+'All right,' said the clown; 'when I'm not friends with any one, I take
+and use the red-'ot poker to 'em,' and he put it in the fire to heat as
+he spoke.
+
+This terrified the boy. It was no use trying to argue with the clown,
+and he had seen how he used a red-hot poker. 'Well, I'll forgive you
+this time,' he said hastily; 'let's come away from here.'
+
+'I tell you what,' said the clown, 'you and me'll go down in the kitchen
+and make a pie.'
+
+Tommy forgot his injuries at this delightful idea; he knew what the
+clown's notion of pie-making would be. 'Yes,' he said eagerly, 'that
+will be jolly; only I don't know,' he added doubtfully, 'if cook will
+let us.'
+
+However, the clown soon managed to secure the kitchen to himself; he had
+merely to attempt to kiss the cook once or twice and throw the best
+dinner service at the other servants, and they were left quite alone to
+do as they pleased.
+
+What fun it was, to begin with! The clown brought out a large deep dish,
+and began by putting a whole turkey and an unskinned hare in it out of
+the larder; after that he put in sausages, jam, pickled walnuts, and
+lemons, and, in short, the first thing that came to hand.
+
+'It ain't 'arf full yet,' he said at last, as he looked gravely into the
+pie.
+
+'No,' said Tommy, sympathetically, 'can't we get anything else to put
+in?'
+
+'The very thing,' cried the clown, 'you're just about the right size to
+fill up--my! what a pie it's going to be, eh?' And he caught up his
+young friend, just as he was, rammed him into the pie, and poured sauce
+on him.
+
+But he kicked and howled until the clown grew seriously displeased. 'Why
+carn't you lay quiet,' he said angrily, 'like the turkey does? you don't
+deserve to be put into such a nice pie!'
+
+'If you make a pie of me,' said Tommy, artfully, 'there'll be nobody to
+look on and laugh at you, you know!'
+
+'No more there won't,' said the clown, and allowed him to crawl out,
+all over sauce. 'It was a pity,' he declared, 'because he fitted so
+nicely, and now they would have to look about for something else;' but
+he contrived to make a shift with the contents of the cook's
+work-basket, which he poured in--reels, pin-cushions, wax, and all. He
+had tried to put the kitchen cat in too, but she scratched his hands and
+could not be induced to form the finishing touch to the pie.
+
+How the clown got the paste and rolled it, and made Tommy in a mess with
+it, and how the pie was finished at last, would take too long to tell
+here; but somehow it was not quite such capital fun as he had
+expected--it seemed to want the pantomime music or something; and then
+Tommy was always dreading lest the clown should change his mind at the
+last minute, and put him in the pie after all.
+
+Even when it was safely in the oven he had another fear lest he should
+be made to stay and eat it, for it had such very peculiar things in it
+that it could not be at all nice. Fortunately, as soon as it was put
+away the clown seemed to weary of it himself.
+
+'Let me and you go and take a walk,' he suggested.
+
+Tommy caught at the proposal, for he was fast becoming afraid of the
+clown, and felt really glad to get him out of the house; so he got his
+cap, and the clown put on a brown overcoat and a tall hat, under which
+his white and red face looked stranger than ever, and they sallied forth
+together.
+
+Once Tommy would have thought it a high privilege to be allowed to go
+out shopping with a clown; but, if the plain truth must be told, he did
+not enjoy himself so very much after all. People seemed to stare at them
+so, for one thing, and he felt almost ashamed of his companion, whose
+behaviour was outrageously ridiculous. They went to all the family
+tradesmen, to whom Tommy was, of course, well known, and the clown
+_would_ order the most impossible things, and say they were for Tommy!
+Once he even pushed him into a large draper's shop, full of pretty and
+contemptuous young ladies, and basely left him to explain his presence
+as he could.
+
+But it was worse when they happened to meet an Italian boy with a tray
+of plaster images on his head.
+
+'Here's a lark!' said the clown, and elbowed Tommy against him in such a
+way that the tray slipped and all the images fell to the ground with a
+crash.
+
+It was certainly amusing to see all the pieces rolling about; but, while
+Tommy was still laughing, the boy began to howl and denounce him to the
+crowd which gathered round them. The crowd declared that it was a shame,
+and that Tommy ought to be made to pay for it; and no one said so more
+loudly and indignantly than the clown!
+
+Before he could escape he had to give his father's name and address, and
+promise that he would pay for the damage, after which he joined the
+clown (who had strolled on) with a heavy heart, for he knew that that
+business would stop all his pocket-money for years after he was grown
+up! He even ventured to reproach his friend: 'I shan't sneak of you, of
+course, he said, 'but you know _you_ did it!' The clown's only answer to
+this was a reproof for telling wicked stories.
+
+At last they passed a confectioner's, and the clown suddenly remembered
+that he was hungry, so they went in, and he borrowed sixpence from
+Tommy, which he spent in buns.
+
+He ate them all himself slowly, and was so very quiet and well-behaved
+all the time that Tommy hoped he was sobering down. They had gone a
+little way from the shop when he found that the clown was eating tarts.
+
+'You might give me one,' said Tommy; and the clown, after looking over
+his shoulder, actually gave him all he had left, filling his pocket with
+them, in fact.
+
+'I never saw you buy them,' he said wonderingly, which the clown said
+was very peculiar; and just then an attendant came up breathlessly.
+
+'You forgot to pay for those tarts,' she said.
+
+The clown replied that he never took pastry. She insisted that they
+were gone, and he must have taken them.
+
+'It wasn't me, please,' said the clown; 'it was this little boy done it.
+Why, he's got a jam tart in his pocket now. Where's a policeman?'
+
+Tommy was so thunderstruck by this treachery that he could say nothing.
+It was only what he might have expected, for had not the clown served
+the pantaloon exactly the same the night before? But that did not make
+the situation any the funnier now, particularly as the clown made such a
+noise that two real policemen came hurrying up.
+
+Tommy did not wait for them. No one held him, and he ran away at the top
+of his speed. What a nightmare sort of run it was!--the policemen
+chasing him, and the clown urging them on at the top of his voice.
+Everybody he passed turned round and ran after him too.
+
+Still he kept ahead. He was surprised to find how fast he could run, and
+all at once he remembered that he was running the opposite way from
+home. Quick as thought he turned up the first street he came to, hoping
+to throw them off the scent and get home by a back way.
+
+For the moment he thought he had got rid of them; but just as he stopped
+to take breath, they all came whooping and hallooing round the corner
+after him; and he had to scamper on, panting, and sobbing, and
+staggering, and almost out of his mind with fright. If he could only
+get home first, and tell his mother! But they were gaining on him, and
+the clown was leading and roaring with delight as he drew closer and
+closer. He came to a point where two roads met. It was round another
+corner, and they could not see him. He ran down one, and, to his immense
+relief, found they had taken the other. He was saved, for his house was
+quite near now.
+
+He tried to hasten, but the pavement was all slushy and slippery, and
+his boots felt heavier and heavier, and, to add to his misery, the
+pursuers had found out their mistake. As he looked back, he could see
+the clown galloping round the corner and hear his yell of discovery.
+
+'Oh, fairy, dear fairy,' he gasped, 'save me this time. I _do_ like your
+part best, now!'
+
+She must have heard him and taken pity, for in a second he had reached
+his door, and it flew open before him. He was not safe even yet, so he
+rushed upstairs to his bedroom, and bounced, just as he was, into his
+bed.
+
+'If they come up I'll pretend I'm ill,' he thought, as he covered his
+head with the bedclothes.
+
+They _were_ coming up, all of them. There was a great trampling on the
+stairs. He heard the clown officiously shouting: 'This way, Mr.
+Policeman, sir!' and then a tremendous battering at his door.
+
+He lay there shivering under the blankets.
+
+'Perhaps they'll think the door's locked, and go away,' he tried to
+hope, and the battering went on not quite so violently.
+
+'Master Tommy! Master Tommy!' It was Sarah's voice. They had got her to
+come up and tempt him out. Well, she _wouldn't_, then!
+
+And then--oh! horror!--the door was thrown open. He sprang out of bed in
+an agony.
+
+'Sarah! Sarah! keep them out,' he gasped. 'Don't let them take me away!'
+
+'Lor', Master Tommy! keep who out?' said Sarah, wonderingly.
+
+'The--the clown--and the policemen,' he said. 'I know they're behind the
+door.'
+
+'There, there!' said Sarah; 'why, you ain't done dreaming yet. That's
+what comes of going out to these late pantomimes. Rub your eyes; it's
+nearly eight o'clock.'
+
+Tommy could have hugged her. It was only a dream after all, then. As he
+stood there, shivering in his nightgown, the nightmare clown began to
+melt away, though even yet some of the adventures he had gone through
+seemed too vivid to be quite imaginary.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Singularly enough, his Uncle John actually did call that morning, and to
+take him to the Crystal Palace, too; and as there was no butter-slide
+for him to fall down on, they were able to go. On the way Tommy told him
+all about his unpleasant dream.
+
+'I shall always hate a clown after this, uncle,' he said, as he
+concluded.
+
+'My good Tommy,' said his uncle, 'when you are fortunate enough to dream
+a dream with a moral in it, don't go and apply it the wrong way up. The
+real clown, like a sensible man, keeps his fun for the place where it is
+harmless and appreciated, and away from the pantomime conducts himself
+like any other respectable person. Now, your _dream_ clown, Tommy----'
+
+'I know,' said Tommy, meekly. 'Should you think the pantomime was good
+here, Uncle John?'
+
+
+
+
+_A CANINE ISHMAEL_
+
+(FROM THE NOTES OF A DINER-OUT)
+
+
+'Tell me,' she said suddenly, with a pretty imperiousness that seemed to
+belong to her, 'are you fond of dogs?' How we arrived at the subject I
+forget now, but I know she had just been describing how a collie at a
+dog-show she had visited lately had suddenly thrown his forepaws round
+her neck in a burst of affection--a proceeding which, in my own mind
+(although I prudently kept this to myself), I considered less
+astonishing than she appeared to do.
+
+For I had had the privilege of taking her in to dinner, and the meal had
+not reached a very advanced stage before I had come to the conclusion
+that she was the most charming, if not the loveliest, person I had ever
+met.
+
+It was fortunate for me that I was honestly able to answer her question
+in a satisfactory manner, for, had it been otherwise, I doubt whether
+she would have deigned to bestow much more of her conversation upon me.
+
+'Then I wonder,' she said next, meditatively, 'if you would care to
+hear about a dog that belonged to--to someone I know very well? Or would
+it bore you?'
+
+I am very certain that if she had volunteered to relate the adventures
+of Telemachus, or the history of the Thirty Years' War, I should have
+accepted the proposal with a quite genuine gratitude. As it was, I made
+it sufficiently plain that I should care very much indeed to hear about
+that dog.
+
+She paused for a moment to reject an unfortunate _entrée_ (which I
+confess to doing my best to console), and then she began her story. I
+shall try to set it down as nearly as possible in her own words,
+although I cannot hope to convey the peculiar charm and interest that
+she gave it for me. It was not, I need hardly say, told all at once, but
+was subject to the inevitable interruptions which render a dinner-table
+intimacy so piquantly precarious.
+
+'This dog,' she began quietly, without any air of beginning a story,
+'this dog was called Pepper. He was not much to look at--rather a rough,
+mongrelly kind of animal; and he and a young man had kept house together
+for a long time, for the young man was a bachelor and lived in chambers
+by himself. He always used to say that he didn't like to get engaged to
+anyone, because he was sure it would put Pepper out so fearfully.
+However, he met somebody at last who made him forget about Pepper, and
+he proposed and was accepted--and then, you know,' she added, as a
+little dimple came in her cheek, 'he had to go home and break the news
+to the dog.'
+
+She had just got to this point, when, taking advantage of a pause she
+made, the man on her other side (who was, I daresay, strictly within his
+rights, although I remember at the time considering him a pushing beast)
+struck in with some remark which she turned to answer, leaving me
+leisure to reflect.
+
+I was feeling vaguely uncomfortable about this story; something, it
+would be hard to say what, in her way of mentioning Pepper's owner made
+me suspect that he was more than a mere acquaintance of hers.
+
+Was it _she_, then, who was responsible for----? It was no business of
+mine, of course; I had never met her in my life till that evening--but I
+began to be impatient to hear the rest.
+
+And at last she turned to me again: 'I hope you haven't forgotten that I
+was in the middle of a story. You haven't? And you would really like me
+to go on? Well, then--oh yes, when Pepper was told, he was naturally a
+little annoyed at first. I daresay he considered he ought to have been
+consulted previously. But, as soon as he had seen the lady, he withdrew
+all opposition--which his master declared was a tremendous load off his
+mind, for Pepper was rather a difficult dog, and slow as a rule to take
+strangers into his affections, a little snappy and surly, and very
+easily hurt or offended. Don't you know dogs who are sensitive like
+that? _I_ do, and I'm always so sorry for them--they feel little things
+so much, and one never can find out what's the matter, and have it out
+with them! Sometimes it's shyness; once I had a dog who was quite
+painfully shy--self-consciousness it was really, I suppose, for he
+always fancied everybody was looking at him, and often when people were
+calling he would come and hide his face in the folds of my dress till
+they had gone--it was too ridiculous! But about Pepper. He was devoted
+to his new mistress from the very first. I am not sure that she was
+quite so struck with him, for he was not at all a lady's dog, and his
+manners had been very much neglected. Still, she came quite to like him
+in time; and when they were married, Pepper went with them for the
+honeymoon.'
+
+'_When they were married!_' I glanced at the card which lay half-hidden
+by her plate. Surely _Miss_ So-and-so was written on it?--yes, it was
+certainly 'Miss.' It was odd that such a circumstance should have
+increased my enjoyment of the story, perhaps--but it undoubtedly did.
+
+'After the honeymoon,' my neighbour continued, 'they came to live in the
+new house, which was quite a tiny one, and Pepper was a very important
+personage in it indeed. He had his mistress all to himself for the
+greater part of most days, as his master had to be away in town; so she
+used to talk to him intimately, and tell him more than she would have
+thought of confiding to most people. Sometimes, when she thought there
+was no fear of callers coming, she would make him play, and this was
+quite a new sensation for Pepper, who was a serious-minded animal, and
+took very solemn views of life. At first he hadn't the faintest idea
+what was expected of him; it must have been rather like trying to romp
+with a parish beadle, he was so intensely respectable! But as soon as he
+once grasped the notion and understood that no liberty was intended, he
+lent himself to it readily enough and learnt to gambol quite creditably.
+Then he was made much of in all sorts of ways; she washed him twice a
+week with her very own hands--which his master would never have dreamt
+of doing--and she was always trying new ribbons on his complexion. That
+rather bored him at first, but it ended by making him a little conceited
+about his appearance. Altogether he was dearly fond of her, and I don't
+believe he had ever been happier in all his life than he was in those
+days. Only, unfortunately, it was all too good to last.'
+
+Here I had to pass olives or something to somebody, and the other man,
+seeing his chance, and, to do him justice, with no idea that he was
+interrupting a story, struck in once more, so that the history of Pepper
+had to remain in abeyance for several minutes.
+
+My uneasiness returned. Could there be a mistake about that name-card
+after all? Cards _do_ get re-arranged sometimes, and she seemed to know
+that young couple so very intimately. I tried to remember whether I had
+been introduced to her as a Miss or Mrs. So-and-so, but without success.
+There is some fatality which generally distracts one's attention at the
+critical moment of introduction, and in this case it was perhaps easily
+accounted for. My turn came again, and she took up her tale once more.
+'I think when I left off I was saying that Pepper's happiness was too
+good to last. And so it was. For his mistress was ill, and, though he
+snuffed and scratched and whined at the door of her room for ever so
+long, they wouldn't let him in. But he managed to slip in one day
+somehow, and jumped up on her lap and licked her hands and face, and
+almost went out of his mind with joy at seeing her again. Only (I told
+you he was a sensitive dog) it gradually struck him that she was not
+_quite_ so pleased to see him as usual--and presently he found out the
+reason. There was another animal there, a new pet, which seemed to take
+up a good deal of her attention. Of course you guess what that was--but
+Pepper had never seen a baby before, and he took it as a personal slight
+and was dreadfully offended. He simply walked straight out of the room
+and downstairs to the kitchen, where he stayed for days.
+
+'I don't think he enjoyed his sulk much, poor doggie; perhaps he had an
+idea that when they saw how much he took it to heart they would send the
+baby away. But as time went on and this didn't seem to occur to them,
+he decided to come out of the sulks and look over the matter, and he
+came back quite prepared to resume the old footing. Only everything was
+different. No one seemed to notice that he was in the room now, and his
+mistress never invited him to have a game; she even forgot to have him
+washed--and one of his peculiarities was that he had no objection to
+soap and warm water. The worst of it was, too, that before very long the
+baby followed him into the sitting-room, and, do what he could, he
+couldn't make the stupid little thing understand that it had no business
+there. If you think of it, a baby must strike a dog as a very inferior
+little animal: it can't bark (well, yes, it _can_ howl), but it's no
+good whatever with rats, and yet everybody makes a tremendous fuss about
+it! The baby got all poor Pepper's bows now; and his mistress played
+games with it, though Pepper felt he could have done it ever so much
+better, but he was never allowed to join in. So he used to lie on a rug
+and pretend he didn't mind, though, really, I'm certain he felt it
+horribly. I always believe, you know, that people never give dogs half
+credit enough for feeling things, don't you?
+
+'Well, at last came the worst indignity of all: Pepper was driven from
+his rug--his own particular rug--to make room for the baby; and when he
+had got away into a corner to cry quietly, all by himself, that wretched
+baby came and crawled after him and pulled his tail!
+
+'He always _had_ been particular about his tail, and never allowed
+anybody to touch it but very intimate friends, and even then under
+protest, so you can imagine how insulted he felt.
+
+'It was too much for him, and he lost the last scrap of temper he had.
+They said he bit the baby, and I'm afraid he did--though not enough
+really to hurt it; still, it howled fearfully, of course, and from that
+moment it was all over with poor Pepper--he was a ruined dog!
+
+'When his master came home that evening he was told the whole story.
+Pepper's mistress said she would be ever so sorry to part with him, but,
+after his misbehaviour, she should never know a moment's peace until he
+was out of the house--it really wasn't safe for baby!
+
+'And his master was sorry, naturally; but I suppose he was beginning
+rather to like the baby himself, and so the end of it was that Pepper
+had to go. They did all they could for him; found him a comfortable
+home, with a friend who was looking out for a good house-dog, and wasn't
+particular about breed, and, after that, they heard nothing of him for a
+long while. And, when they did hear, it was rather a bad report: the
+friend could do nothing with Pepper at all; he had to tie him up in the
+stable, and then he snapped at everyone who came near, and howled all
+night--they were really almost afraid of him.
+
+'So when Pepper's mistress heard that, she felt more thankful than ever
+that the dog had been sent away, and tried to think no more about him.
+She had quite forgotten all about it, when, one day, a new nursemaid,
+who had taken the baby out for an airing, came back with a terrible
+account of a savage dog which had attacked them, and leaped up at the
+perambulator so persistently that it was as much as she could do to
+drive it away. And even then Pepper's mistress did not associate the dog
+with him; she thought he had been destroyed long ago.
+
+'But the next time the nurse went out with the baby she took a thick
+stick with her, in case the dog should come again. And no sooner had she
+lifted the perambulator over the step, than the dog _did_ come again,
+exactly as if he had been lying in wait for them ever since outside the
+gate.
+
+'The nurse was a strong country girl, with plenty of pluck, and as the
+dog came leaping and barking about in a very alarming way, she hit him
+as hard as she could on his head. The wonder is she did not kill him on
+the spot, and, as it was, the blow turned him perfectly giddy and silly
+for a time, and he ran round and round in a dazed sort of way--do you
+think you could lower that candle-shade just a little? Thanks!' she
+broke off suddenly, as I obeyed. 'Well, she was going to strike again,
+when her mistress rushed out, just in time to stop her. For, you see,
+she had been watching at the window, and although the poor beast was
+miserably thin, and rough, and neglected-looking, she knew at once that
+it must be Pepper, and that he was not in the least mad or dangerous,
+but only trying his best to make his peace with the baby. Very likely
+his dignity or his conscience or something wouldn't let him come back
+quite at once, you know; and perhaps he thought he had better get the
+baby on his side first. And then all at once, his mistress--I heard all
+this through her, of course--his mistress suddenly remembered how
+devoted Pepper had been to her, and how fond she had once been of him,
+and when she saw him standing, stupid and shivering, there, her heart
+softened to him, and she went to make it up with him, and tell him that
+he was forgiven and should come back and be her dog again, just as in
+the old days!----'
+
+Here she broke off for a moment. I did not venture to look at her, but I
+thought her voice trembled a little when she spoke again. 'I don't quite
+know _why_ I tell you all this. There was a time when I never could bear
+the end of it myself,' she said; 'but I have begun, and I will finish
+now. Well, Pepper's mistress went towards him, and called him;
+but--whether he was still too dizzy to quite understand who she was, or
+whether his pride came uppermost again, poor dear! I don't know--but he
+gave her just one look (she says she will never forget it--never; it
+went straight to her heart), and then he walked very slowly and
+deliberately away.
+
+'She couldn't bear it; she followed; she felt she simply _must_ make
+him understand how very, very sorry she was for him; but the moment he
+heard her he began to run faster and faster, until he was out of reach
+and out of sight, and she had to come back. I know she was crying
+bitterly by that time.'
+
+'And he never came back again?' I asked, after a silence.
+
+'Never again!' she said softly; 'that was the very last they ever saw or
+heard of him. And--and I've always loved every dog since for Pepper's
+sake!'
+
+'I'm almost glad he did decline to come back,' I declared; 'it served
+his mistress right--she didn't deserve anything else!'
+
+'Ah, I didn't want you to say that!' she protested; 'she never meant to
+be so unkind--it was all for the baby's sake!'
+
+I was distinctly astonished, for all her sympathy in telling the story
+had seemed to lie in the other direction.
+
+'You don't mean to say,' I cried involuntarily, 'that you can find any
+excuses for her? I did not expect _you_ would take the baby's part!'
+
+'But I did,' she confessed, with lowered eyes--'I _did_ take the baby's
+part--it was all my doing that Pepper was sent away--I have been sorry
+enough for it since!'
+
+It was her own story she had been telling at second-hand after all--and
+she was not Miss So-and-so! I had entirely forgotten the existence of
+any other members of the party but our two selves, but at the moment of
+this discovery--which was doubly painful--I was recalled by a general
+rustle to the fact that we were at a dinner-party, and that our hostess
+had just given the signal.
+
+As I rose and drew back my chair to allow my neighbour to pass, she
+raised her eyes for a moment and said almost meekly:
+
+'I _was_ the baby, you see!'
+
+
+
+
+_MARJORY_
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+I have thought myself justified in printing the following narrative,
+found among the papers of my dead friend, Douglas Cameron, who left me
+discretion to deal with them as I saw fit. It was written indeed, as its
+opening words imply, rather for his own solace and relief than with the
+expectation that it would be read by any other. But, painful and
+intimate as it is in parts, I cannot think that any harm will be done by
+printing it now, with some necessary alterations in the names of the
+characters chiefly concerned.
+
+Before, however, leaving the story to speak for itself, I should like to
+state, in justice to my friend, that during the whole of my acquaintance
+with him, which began in our college days, I never saw anything to
+indicate the morbid timidity and weakness of character that seem to have
+marked him as a boy. Reserved he undoubtedly was, with a taste for
+solitude that made him shrink from the society of all but a small
+circle, and with a sensitive and shy nature which prevented him from
+doing himself complete justice; but he was very capable of holding his
+own on occasion, and in his disposition, as I knew it, there was no want
+of moral courage, nor any trace of effeminacy.
+
+How far he may have unconsciously exaggerated such failings in the
+revelation of his earlier self, or what the influence of such an
+experience as he relates may have done to strengthen the moral fibre,
+are points on which I can express no opinion, any more than I can pledge
+myself to the credibility of the supernatural element of his story.
+
+It may be that only in the boy's overwrought imagination, the innocent
+Child-spirit came back to complete the work of love and pity she had
+begun in life; but I know that he himself believed otherwise, and,
+truly, if those who leave us are permitted to return at all, it must be
+on some such errand as Marjory's.
+
+Douglas Cameron's life was short, and in it, so far as I am aware, he
+met no one who at all replaced his lost ideal. Of this I cannot be
+absolutely certain, for he was a reticent man in such matters; but I
+think, had it been so, I should have known of it, for we were very close
+friends. One would hardly expect, perhaps, that an ordinary man would
+remain faithful all his days to the far-off memory of a child-love; but
+then Cameron was not quite as other men, nor were his days long in the
+land.
+
+And if this ideal of his was never dimmed for him by some grosser, and
+less spiritual, passion, who shall say that he may not have been a
+better and even a happier man in consequence.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+It is not without an effort that I have resolved to break, in the course
+of this narrative, the reserve maintained for nearly twenty years. But
+the chief reason for silence is removed now that all those are gone who
+might have been pained or harmed by what I have to tell, and, though I
+shrink still from reviving certain memories that are fraught with pain,
+there are others associated therewith which will surely bring
+consolation and relief.
+
+I must have been about eleven at the time I am speaking of, and the
+change which--for good or ill--comes over most boys' lives had not yet
+threatened mine. I had not left home for school, nor did it seem at all
+probable then that I should ever do so.
+
+When I read (I was a great reader) of Dotheboys Hall and Salem House--a
+combination of which establishments formed my notion of school-life--it
+was with no more personal interest than a cripple might feel in perusing
+the notice of an impending conscription; for from the battles of
+school-life I was fortunately exempted.
+
+I was the only son of a widow, and we led a secluded life in a London
+suburb. My mother took charge of my education herself, and, as far as
+mere acquirements went, I was certainly not behind other boys of my
+age. I owe too much to that loving and careful training, Heaven knows,
+to think of casting any reflection upon it here, but my surroundings
+were such as almost necessarily to exclude all bracing and hardening
+influences.
+
+My mother had few friends; we were content with our own companionship,
+and of boys I knew and cared to know nothing; in fact, I regarded a
+strange boy with much the same unreasoning aversion as many excellent
+women feel for the most ordinary cow.
+
+I was happy to think that I should never be called upon to associate
+with them; by-and-by, when I outgrew my mother's teaching, I was to have
+a tutor, perhaps even go to college in time, and when I became a man I
+was to be a curate and live with my mother in a clematis-covered cottage
+in some pleasant village.
+
+She would often dwell on this future with a tender prospective pride;
+she spoke of it on the very day that saw it shattered for ever.
+
+For there came a morning when, on going to her with my lessons for the
+day, I was gladdened with an unexpected holiday. I little knew
+then--though I was to learn it soon enough--that my lessons had been all
+holidays, or that on that day they were to end for ever.
+
+My mother had had one or two previous attacks of an illness which seemed
+to prostrate her for a short period, and as she soon regained her
+ordinary health, I did not think they could be of a serious nature.
+
+So I devoted my holiday cheerfully enough to the illumination of a
+text, on the gaudy colouring of which I found myself gazing two days
+later with a dull wonder, as at the work of a strange hand in a long
+dead past, for the boy who had painted that was a happy boy who had a
+mother, and for two endless days I had been alone.
+
+Those days, and many that followed, come back to me now but vaguely. I
+passed them mostly in a state of blank bewilderment caused by the double
+sense of sameness and strangeness in everything around me; then there
+were times when this gave way to a passionate anguish which refused all
+attempts at comfort, and times even--but very, very seldom--when I
+almost forgot what had happened to me.
+
+Our one servant remained in the house with me, and a friend and
+neighbour of my mother's was constant in her endeavours to relieve my
+loneliness; but I was impatient of them, I fear, and chiefly anxious to
+be left alone to indulge my melancholy unchecked.
+
+I remember how, as autumn began, and leaf after leaf fluttered down from
+the trees in our little garden, I watched them fall with a heavier
+heart, for they had known my mother, and now they, too, were deserting
+me.
+
+This morbid state of mind had lasted quite long enough when my uncle,
+who was my guardian, saw fit to put a summary end to it by sending me
+to school forthwith; he would have softened the change for me by taking
+me to his own home first, but there was illness of some sort there, and
+this was out of the question.
+
+I was neither sorry nor glad when I heard of it, for all places were the
+same to me just then; only, as the time drew near, I began to regard the
+future with a growing dread.
+
+The school was at some distance from London, and my uncle took me down
+by rail; but the only fact I remember connected with the journey is that
+there was a boy in the carriage with us who cracked walnuts all the way,
+and I wondered if he was going to school too, and concluded that he was
+not, or he would hardly eat quite so many walnuts.
+
+Later we were passing through some wrought-iron gates, and down an
+avenue of young chestnuts, which made a gorgeous autumn canopy of
+scarlet, amber, and orange, up to a fine old red-brick house, with a
+high-pitched roof, and a cupola in which a big bell hung, tinted a warm
+gold by the afternoon sun.
+
+This was my school, and it did not look so very-terrible after all.
+There was a big bow-window by the pillared portico, and, looking timidly
+in, I saw a girl of about my own age sitting there, absorbed in the book
+she was reading, her long brown hair drooping over her cheek and the
+hand on which it rested.
+
+She glanced up at the sound of the door-bell, and I felt her eyes
+examining me seriously and critically, and then I forgot everything but
+the fact that I was about to be introduced to my future schoolmaster,
+the Rev. Basil Dering.
+
+This was less of an ordeal than I had expected; he had a strong,
+massively-cut, leonine face, free and abundant white hair, streaked with
+dark grey, but there was a kind light in his eyes as I looked up at
+them, and the firm mouth could smile, I found, pleasantly enough.
+
+Mrs. Dering seemed younger, and was handsome, with a certain stateliness
+and decision of manner which put me less at my ease, and I was relieved
+to be told I might say good-bye to my uncle, and wander about the
+grounds as I liked.
+
+I was not surprised to pass through an empty schoolroom, and to descend
+by some steep stairs to a deserted playground, for we had been already
+told that the Michaelmas holidays were not over, and that the boys would
+not return for some days to come.
+
+It gave me a kind of satisfaction to think of my resemblance, just then,
+to my favourite David Copperfield, but I was to have a far pleasanter
+companion than poor lugubrious, flute-tootling Mr. Mell, for as I paced
+the damp paths paved with a mosaic of russet and yellow leaves, I heard
+light footsteps behind me, and turned to find myself face to face with
+the girl I had seen at the window.
+
+She stood there breathless for an instant, for she had hurried to
+overtake me, and against a background of crimson creepers I saw the
+brilliant face, with its soft but fearless brown eyes, small straight
+nose, spirited mouth, and crisp wavy golden-brown hair, which I see now
+almost as distinctly as I write.
+
+'You're the new boy,' she said at length. 'I've come out to make you
+feel more at home. I suppose you don't feel _quite_ at home just yet?'
+
+'Not quite, thank you,' I said, lifting my cap with ceremony, for I had
+been taught to be particular about my manners; 'I have never been to
+school before, you see, Miss Dering.'
+
+I think she was a little puzzled by so much politeness. 'I know,' she
+said softly; 'mother told me about it, and I'm very sorry. And I'm
+called Marjory, generally. Shall you like school, do you think?'
+
+'I might,' said I, 'if--if it wasn't for the boys!'
+
+'Boys aren't bad,' she said; 'ours are rather nice, I think. But perhaps
+you don't know many?'
+
+'I know one,' I replied.
+
+'How old is _he_?' she wished to know.
+
+'Not very old--about three, I think,' I said. I had never wished till
+then that my only male acquaintance had been of less tender years, but I
+felt now that he was rather small, and saw that Marjory was of the same
+opinion.
+
+'Why, he's only a baby!' she said; 'I thought you meant a _real_ boy.
+And is that all the boys you know? Are you fond of games?'
+
+'Some games--very,' said I.
+
+'What's your favourite game?' she demanded.
+
+'Bezique,' I answered, 'or draughts.'
+
+'I meant _out_door games; draughts are indoor games--_is_ indoor games,
+I mean--no, _are_ an indoor game--and _that_ doesn't sound grammar! But
+haven't you ever played cricket? Not ever, really? I like it dreadfully
+myself, only I'm not allowed to play with the boys, and I'm sure I can
+bat well enough for the second eleven--Cartwright said I could last
+term--and I can bowl round-hand, and it's all no use, just because I was
+born a girl! Wouldn't you like a game at something? They haven't taken
+in the croquet hoops yet; shall we play at that?'
+
+But again I had to confess my ignorance of what was then the popular
+garden game.
+
+'What do you generally do to amuse yourself, then?' she inquired.
+
+'I read, generally, or paint texts or outlines. Sometimes'--(I thought
+this accomplishment would surely appeal to her)--'sometimes I do
+woolwork!'
+
+'I don't think I would tell the boys that,' she advised rather gravely;
+she evidently considered me a very desperate case. 'It's such a pity,
+your not knowing any games. Suppose I taught you croquet, now? It would
+be something to go on with, and you'll soon learn if you pay attention
+and do exactly what I tell you.'
+
+I submitted myself meekly to her direction, and Marjory enjoyed her
+office of instructress for a time, until my extreme slowness wore out
+her patience, and she began to make little murmurs of disgust, for which
+she invariably apologised. 'That's enough for to-day!' she said at last,
+'I'll take you again to-morrow. But you really must try and pick up
+games, Cameron, or you'll never be liked. Let me see, I wonder if
+there's time to teach you a little football. I think I could do that.'
+
+Before she could make any further arrangements the tea-bell rang, but
+when I lay down that night in my strange cold bed, hemmed round by other
+beds, which were only less formidable than if they had been occupied, I
+did not feel so friendless as I might have done, and dreamed all night
+that Marjory was teaching me something I understood to be cricket,
+which, however, was more like a bloated kind of backgammon.
+
+The next day Marjory was allowed to go out walking with me, and I came
+home feeling that I had known her for quite a long time, while her
+manner to me had acquired a tone even more protecting than before, and
+she began to betray an anxiety as to my school prospects which filled me
+with uneasiness.
+
+'I am so afraid the boys won't like the way you talk,' she said on one
+occasion.
+
+'I used to be told I spoke very correctly,' I said, verdantly enough.
+
+'But not like boys talk. You see, Cameron, I ought to know, with such a
+lot of them about. I tell you what I could do, though--I could teach you
+most of their words--only I must run and ask mother first if I may.
+Teaching slang isn't the same as using it on my own account, is it?'
+
+Marjory darted off impulsively to ask leave, to return presently with a
+slow step and downcast face. 'I mayn't,' she announced. 'Mother says
+"Certainly not," so there's an end of that! Still, I think myself it's a
+decided pity.'
+
+And more than once that day she would observe, as if to herself, 'I do
+wish they had let him come to school in different collars!'
+
+I knew that these remarks, and others of a similar tendency, were
+prompted by her interest in my welfare, and I admired her too heartily
+already to be offended by them: still, I cannot say they added to my
+peace of mind.
+
+And on the last evening of the holidays she said 'Good-night' to me with
+some solemnity. 'Everything will be different after this,' she said; 'I
+shan't be able to see nearly so much of you, because I'm not allowed to
+be much with the boys. But I shall be looking after you all the time,
+Cameron, and seeing how you get on. And oh! I do hope you will try to be
+a popular kind of boy!'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+I'm afraid I must own that this desire of Marjory's was not realised. I
+do not know that I tried to be--and I certainly was not--a popular boy.
+
+The other boys, I now know, were by no means bad specimens of the
+English schoolboy, as will be evident when I state that, for a time, my
+deep mourning was held by them to give me a claim to their forbearance.
+
+But I had an unfortunate tendency to sudden floods of tears (apparently
+for no cause whatever, really from some secret spring of association,
+such as I remember was touched when I first found myself learning Latin
+from the same primer over which my mother and I had puzzled together),
+and these outbursts at first aroused my companions' contempt, and
+finally their open ridicule.
+
+I could not conceal my shrinking dislike to their society, which was not
+calculated to make them more favourably disposed towards me; while my
+tastes, my expressions, my ways of looking at things, were all at total
+variance with their own standards.
+
+The general disapproval might well have shown itself in a harsher manner
+than that of merely ignoring my existence--and it says much for the tone
+of the school that it did not; unfortunately, I felt their indifference
+almost as keenly as I had dreaded their notice.
+
+From my masters I met with more favour, for I had been thoroughly well
+grounded, and found, besides, a temporary distraction in my school-work;
+but this was hardly likely to render me more beloved by my fellows, and
+so it came to pass that every day saw my isolation more complete.
+
+Something, however, made me anxious to hide this from Marjory's eyes,
+and whenever she happened to be looking on at us in the school grounds
+or the playing fields, I made dismal attempts to appear on terms of
+equality with the rest, and would hang about a group with as much
+pretence of belonging to it as I thought at all prudent.
+
+If she had had more opportunities of questioning me, she would have
+found me out long before; as it was, the only occasion on which we were
+near one another was at the weekly drawing lesson, when, although she
+drew less and talked more than the Professor quite approved of, she was
+obliged to restrict herself to a conversation which did not admit of
+confidences.
+
+But this negative neutral-tinted misery was not to last; I was harmless
+enough, but then to some natures nothing is so offensive as
+inoffensiveness. My isolation was certain to raise me up an enemy in
+time, and he came in the person of one Clarence Ormsby.
+
+He was a sturdy, good-looking fellow, about two years older than myself,
+good at games, and, though not brilliant in other respects, rather idle
+than dull. He was popular in the school, and I believe his general
+disposition was by no means bad; but there must have been some hidden
+flaw in his nature which might never have disclosed itself for any other
+but me.
+
+For me he had displayed, almost from the first, one of those special
+antipathies that want but little excuse to ripen into hatred. My
+personal appearance--I had the misfortune to be a decidedly plain
+boy--happened to be particularly displeasing to him, and, as he had an
+unsparing tongue, he used it to cover me with ridicule, until gradually,
+finding that I did not retaliate, he indulged in acts of petty
+oppression which, though not strictly bullying, were even more harassing
+and humiliating.
+
+I suspect now that if I had made ever so slight a stand at the outset, I
+should have escaped further molestation, but I was not pugnacious by
+nature, and never made the experiment; partly, probably, from a theory
+on which I had been reared, that all violence was vulgar, but chiefly
+from a tendency, unnatural in one of my age and sex, to find a
+sentimental satisfaction in a certain degree of unhappiness.
+
+So that I can neither pity myself nor expect pity from others for woes
+which were so essentially my own creation, though they resulted, alas!
+in misery that was real enough.
+
+It was inevitable that quick-sighted Marjory should discover the
+subjection into which I had fallen, and her final enlightenment was
+brought about in this manner. Ormsby and I were together alone, shortly
+before morning school, and he came towards me with an exercise of mine
+from which he had just been copying his own, for we were in the same
+classes, despite the difference in our ages, and he was in the habit of
+profiting thus by my industry.
+
+'Thanks, Cameron,' he said, with a sweetness which I distrusted, for he
+was not as a rule so lavish in his gratitude. 'I've copied out that
+exercise of yours, but it's written so beastly badly that you'd better
+do it over again.'
+
+With which he deliberately tore the page he had been copying from to
+scraps, which he threw in my face, and strolled out down to the
+playground.
+
+I was preparing submissively to do the exercise over again as well as I
+could in the short time that was left, when I was startled by a low cry
+of indignation, and, looking round, saw Marjory standing in the doorway,
+and knew by her face that she had seen all.
+
+'Has Ormsby done that to you before?' she inquired.
+
+'Once or twice he has,' said I.
+
+'And you let him!' she cried. 'Oh, Cameron!'
+
+'What can I do?' I said.
+
+'I know what _I_ would do,' she replied. 'I would slap his face, or
+pinch him. I wouldn't put up with it!'
+
+'Boys don't slap one another, or pinch,' I said, not displeased to find
+a weak place in her knowledge of us.
+
+'Well, they do _something_!' she said; 'a real boy would. But I don't
+think you are a real boy, Cameron. _I'll_ show you what to do. Where's
+the exercise that--that _pig_ copied? Ah! I see it. And now--look!'
+(Here she tore his page as he had torn mine.)
+
+'Now for an envelope!' and from the Doctor's own desk she took an
+envelope, in which she placed the fragments, and wrote on the outside in
+her round, childish hand: 'With Marjory's compliments, for being a
+bully.'
+
+'He won't do that again,' she said gleefully.
+
+'He'll do worse,' I said in dismay; 'I shall have to pay for it.
+Marjory, why didn't you leave things alone? I didn't complain--you know
+I didn't.'
+
+She turned upon me, as well she might, in supreme disdain. 'Oh! what a
+coward you are! I wouldn't believe all Cartwright told me about you when
+I asked--but I see it's all true. Why don't you stick up for yourself?'
+
+I muttered something or other.
+
+'But you _ought_ to. You'll never get on unless,' said Marjory, very
+decidedly. 'Now, promise me you will, next time.'
+
+I sat there silent. I was disgusted with myself, and meanly angry with
+her for having rendered me so.
+
+'Then, listen,' she said impressively. 'I promised I would look after
+you, and I did mean to, but it's no use if you won't help yourself. So,
+unless you say you won't go on being a coward any more, I shall have to
+leave you to your own way, and not take the least interest in you ever
+again.'
+
+'Then, you may,' I said stolidly; 'I don't care.' I wondered, even while
+I spoke the words, what could be impelling me to treat spirited,
+warm-hearted Marjory like that, and I hate myself still at the
+recollection.
+
+'Good-bye, then,' she said very quietly; 'I'm sorry, Cameron.' And she
+went out without another word.
+
+When Ormsby came in, I watched him apprehensively as he read the
+envelope upon his desk and saw its contents. He said nothing, however,
+though he shot a malignant glance in my direction; but the lesson was
+not lost upon him, for from that time he avoided all open ill-treatment
+of me, and even went so far as to assume a friendliness which might have
+reassured me had I not instinctively felt that it merely masked the old
+dislike.
+
+I was constantly the victim of mishaps, in the shape of missing and
+defaced books, ink mysteriously spilt or strangely adulterated, and,
+though I could never trace them to any definite hand, they seemed too
+systematic to be quite accidental; still I made no sign, and hoped thus
+to disarm my persecutor--if persecutor there were.
+
+As for my companions, I knew that in no case would they take the trouble
+to interfere in my behalf; they had held aloof from the first, the
+general opinion (which I now perceive was not unjust) being that 'I
+deserved all I got.'
+
+And my estrangement from Marjory grew wider and wider; she never spoke
+to me now when we sat near one another at the drawing-class; if she
+looked at me it was by stealth, and with a glance that I thought
+sometimes was contemptuously pitiful, and sometimes half fancied
+betrayed a willingness to return to the old comradeship.
+
+But I nursed my stupid, sullen pride, though my heart ached with it at
+times. For I had now come to love Marjory devotedly, with a love that,
+though I was a boy and she was a child, was as genuine as any I am ever
+likely to feel again.
+
+The chance of seeing her now and then, of hearing her speak--though it
+was not to me--gave me the one interest in my life, which, but for her,
+I could hardly have borne. But this love of mine was a very far-off and
+disinterested worship after all. I could not imagine myself ever
+speaking of it to her, or picture her as accepting it. Marjory was too
+thorough a child to be vulgarised in that way, even in thought.
+
+The others were healthy, matter-of-fact youths, to whom Marjory was an
+ordinary girl, and who certainly did not indulge in any strained
+sentiment respecting her; it was left for me to idealise her; but of
+that, at least, I cannot feel ashamed, or believe that it did me
+anything but good.
+
+And the days went on, until it wanted but a fortnight to Christmas, and
+most of us were thinking of the coming holidays, and preparing with a
+not unpleasant excitement for the examinations, which were all that
+barred the way to them now. I was to spend my Christmas with my uncle
+and cousins, who would by that time be able to receive me; but I felt no
+very pleasurable anticipations, for my cousins were all boys, and from
+boys I thought I knew what to expect.
+
+One afternoon Ormsby came to me with the request that I would execute a
+trifling commission for him in the adjoining village; he himself, he
+said, was confined to bounds, but he had a shilling he wanted to lay out
+at a small fancy-shop we were allowed to patronise, and he considered me
+the best person to be entrusted with that coin. I was simply to spend
+the money on anything I thought best, for he had entire confidence, he
+gave me to understand, in my taste and judgment. I think I suspected a
+design of some sort, but I did not dare to refuse, and then his manner
+to some extent disarmed me.
+
+I took the shilling, therefore, with which I bought some article--I
+forget what--and got back to the school at dusk. The boys had all gone
+down to tea except Ormsby, who was waiting for me up in the empty
+schoolroom.
+
+'Well?' he said, and I displayed my purchase, only to find that I had
+fallen into a trap.
+
+When I think how easily I was the dupe of that not too subtle artifice,
+which was only half malicious, I could smile, if I did not know how it
+ended.
+
+'How much was that?' he asked contemptuously, 'twopence-halfpenny? Well,
+if you choose to give a shilling for it, I'm not going to pay, that's
+all. So just give me back my shilling!'
+
+Now, as my weekly allowance consisted of threepence, which was
+confiscated for some time in advance (as I think he knew), to provide
+fines for my mysteriously-stained dictionaries, this was out of the
+question, as I represented.
+
+'Then go back to the shop and change it,' said he; 'I won't have that
+thing!'
+
+'Tell me what you would like instead, and I will,' I stipulated, not
+unreasonably.
+
+He laughed; his little scheme was working so admirably. 'That's not the
+bargain,' he said; 'you're bound to get me something I like. I'm not
+obliged to tell you what it is.'
+
+But even I was driven to protest against such flagrant unfairness. 'I
+didn't know you meant that,' I said, 'or I'm sure I shouldn't have gone.
+I went to oblige _you_, Ormsby.'
+
+'No, you didn't,' he said, 'you went because I told you. And you'll go
+again.'
+
+'Not unless you tell me what I'm to get,' I said.
+
+'I tell you what I believe,' he said; 'you never spent the whole
+shilling at all on that; you bought something for yourself with the
+rest, you young swindler! No wonder you won't go back to the shop.'
+
+This was, of course, a mere taunt flung out by his inventive fancy; but
+as he persisted in it, and threatened exposure and a variety of
+consequences, I became alarmed, for I had little doubt that, innocent as
+I was, I could be made very uncomfortable by accusations which would
+find willing hearers.
+
+He stood there enjoying my perplexity and idly twisting a piece of
+string round and round his fingers. At length he said, 'Well, I don't
+want to be hard on you. You may go and change this for me even now, if
+you like. I'll give you three minutes to think it over, and you can come
+down into the playground when I sing out, and tell me what you mean to
+do. And you had better be sharp in coming, too, or it will be the worse
+for you.'
+
+He took his cap, and presently I heard him going down the steps to the
+playground. I would have given worlds to go and join the rest at tea,
+but I did not dare, and remained in the schoolroom, which was dim just
+then, for the gas was lowered; and while I stood there by the fireplace,
+trembling in the cold air which stole in through the door Ormsby had
+left open, Marjory came in by the other one, and was going straight to
+her father's desk, when she saw me.
+
+Her first impulse seemed to be to take no notice, but something in my
+face or attitude made her alter her mind and come straight to me,
+holding out her hand.
+
+'Cameron,' she said, 'shall we be friends again?'
+
+'Yes, Marjory,' I said; I could not have said any more just then.
+
+'You look so miserable, I couldn't bear it any longer,' she said, 'so I
+_had_ to make it up. You know, I was only pretending crossness, Cameron,
+all the time, because I really thought it was best. But it doesn't seem
+to have done you much good, and I did promise to take care of you. What
+is it? Ormsby again?'
+
+'Yes,' I said, and told her the story of the commission.
+
+'Oh, you stupid boy!' she cried, 'couldn't you see he only wanted to
+pick a quarrel? And if you change it now, he'll make you change it
+again, and the next time, and the next after that--I know he will!'
+
+Here Ormsby's voice shouted from below, 'Now then, you, Cameron, time's
+up!'
+
+'What is he doing down there?' asked Marjory, and her indignation rose
+higher when she heard.
+
+'Now, Cameron, be brave; go down and tell him once for all he may just
+keep what he has, and be thankful. Whatever it is, it's good enough for
+_him_, I'm sure!'
+
+But I still hung back. 'It's no use, Marjory, he'll tell everyone I
+cheated him--he says he will!'
+
+'That he shall not!' she cried; 'I won't have it, I'll go myself, and
+tell him what I think of him, and make him stop treating you like this.'
+
+Some faint glimmer of manliness made me ashamed to allow her thus to
+fight my battles. 'No, Marjory, not you!' I said; 'I will go: I'll say
+what you want me to say!'
+
+But it was too late. I saw her for just a second at the door, my
+impetuous, generous little Marjory, as she flung back her pretty hair in
+a certain spirited way she had, and nodded to me encouragingly.
+
+And then--I can hardly think of it calmly even now--there came a sharp
+scream, and the sound of a fall, and, after that, silence.
+
+Sick with fear, I rushed to the head of the steps, and looked down into
+the brown gloom.
+
+'Keep where you are for a minute!' I heard Ormsby cry out. 'It's all
+right--she's not hurt; now you can come down.'
+
+I was down in another instant, at the foot of the stairs, where, in a
+patch of faint light that fell from the door above, lay Marjory, with
+Ormsby bending over her insensible form.
+
+'She's dead!' I cried in my terror, as I saw her white face.
+
+'I tell you she's all right,' said he, impatiently; 'there's nothing to
+make a fuss about. She slipped coming down and cut her forehead--that's
+all.'
+
+'Marjory, speak to me--don't look like that; tell me you're not much
+hurt!' I implored her; but she only moaned a little, and her eyes
+remained fast shut.
+
+'It's no use worrying her now, you know,' said Ormsby, more gently.
+'Just help me to get her round to the kitchen door, and tell somebody.'
+
+We carried her there between us, and, amidst a scene of terrible
+confusion and distress, Marjory, still insensible, was carried into the
+library, and a man sent off in hot haste for the surgeon.
+
+A little later Ormsby and I were sent for to the study, where Dr.
+Dering, whose face was white and drawn as I had never seen it before,
+questioned us closely as to our knowledge of the accident.
+
+Ormsby could only say that he was out in the playground, when he saw
+somebody descending the steps, and heard a fall, after which he ran up
+and found Marjory.
+
+'I sent her into the schoolroom to bring my paper-knife,' said the
+Doctor; 'if I had but gone myself--! But why should she have gone
+outside on a frosty night like this?'
+
+'Oh, Dr. Dering!' I broke out, 'I'm afraid--I'm afraid she went for me!'
+
+I saw Ormsby's face as I spoke, and there was a look upon it which made
+me pity him.
+
+'And you sent my poor child out on your errand, Cameron! Could you not
+have done it yourself?'
+
+'I wish I had!' I exclaimed; 'oh, I wish I had! I tried to stop her,
+and then--and then it was too late. Please tell me, sir, is she badly
+hurt?'
+
+'How can I tell?' he said harshly; 'there, I can't speak of this just
+yet: go, both of you.'
+
+There was little work done at evening preparation that night; the whole
+school was buzzing with curiosity and speculation, as we heard doors
+opening and shutting around, and the wheels of the doctor's gig as it
+rolled up the chestnut avenue.
+
+I sat with my hands shielding my eyes and ears, engaged to all
+appearance with the books before me, while my restless thoughts were
+employed in making earnest resolutions for the future.
+
+At last I saw my cowardice in its true light, and felt impatient to tell
+Marjory that I did so, to prove to her that I had really reformed; but
+when would an opportunity come? I might not see her again for days,
+perhaps not at all till after the holidays; but I would not let myself
+dwell upon such a contingency as that, and, to banish it, tried to
+picture what Marjory would say, and how she would look, when I was
+allowed to see her again.
+
+After evening prayers, read by one of the assistant-masters, for the
+Doctor did not appear again, we were enjoined to go up to our bedrooms
+with as little noise as possible, and we had been in bed some time
+before Sutcliffe, the old butler, came up as usual to put out the
+lights.
+
+On this occasion he was assailed by a fire of eager whispers from every
+door: 'Sutcliffe, hi! old Sutty, how is she?' but he did not seem to
+hear, until a cry louder than the rest brought him to our room.
+
+'For God's sake, gentlemen, don't!' he said, in a hoarse whisper, as he
+turned out the light; 'they'll hear you downstairs.'
+
+'But how is she? do you know--better?'
+
+'Ay,' he said, 'she's better. She'll be over her trouble soon, will Miss
+Marjory!'
+
+A low murmur of delight ran round the room, which the butler tried to
+check in vain.
+
+'Don't!' he said again, 'wait--wait till morning.... Go to sleep quiet
+now, and I'll come up first thing and tell you.'
+
+He had no sooner turned his back than the general relief broke out
+irrepressibly; Ormsby being especially demonstrative. 'Didn't I tell you
+fellows so?' he said triumphantly; 'as if it was likely a plucky girl
+like Marjory would mind a little cut like that. She'll be all right in
+the morning, you see!'
+
+But this confidence jarred upon me, who could not pretend to share it,
+until I was unable to restrain the torturing anxiety I felt.
+
+'You're wrong--all of you!' I cried, 'I'm sure she's not better. Didn't
+you hear how Sutcliffe said it? She's _worse_--she may even be dying!'
+
+I met with the usual treatment of a prophet of evil. 'You young muff,' I
+was told on all sides, 'who asked your opinion? Who are you, to know
+better than anyone else?'
+
+Ormsby attacked me hotly for trying to excite a groundless alarm, and I
+was recommended to hold my tongue and go to sleep.
+
+I said no more, but I could not sleep; the others dropped off one by
+one, Ormsby being the last; but I lay awake listening and thinking,
+until the dread and suspense grew past bearing. I _must_ know the truth.
+I would go down and find the Doctor, and beg him to tell me; he might be
+angry and punish me--but that would be nothing in comparison with the
+relief of knowing my fear was unfounded.
+
+Stealthily I slipped out of bed, stole through the dim room to the door,
+and down the old staircase, which creaked under my bare feet. The dog in
+the yard howled as I passed the big window, through which the stars were
+sparkling frostily in the keen blue sky. Outside the room in which
+Marjory lay, I listened, but could hear nothing. At least she was
+sleeping, then, and, relieved already, I went on down to the hall.
+
+The big clock on a table there was ticking solemnly, like a slow
+footfall; the lamp was alight, so the Doctor must be still up. With a
+heart that beat loudly I went to his study door and lifted my hand to
+knock, when from within rose a sound at which the current of my blood
+stopped and ran backwards--the terrible, heartbroken grief of a grown
+man.
+
+Boy as I was, I felt that an agony like that was sacred; besides, I
+knew the worst then.
+
+I dragged myself upstairs again, cold to the bones, with a brain that
+was frozen too. My one desire was to reach my bed, cover my face, and
+let the tears flow; though, when I did regain it, no tears and no
+thoughts came. I lay there and shivered for some time, with a stony,
+stunned sensation, and then I slept--as if Marjory were well.
+
+The next morning the bell under the cupola did not clang, and Sutcliffe
+came up with the direction that we were to go down very quietly, and not
+to draw up the window-blinds; and then we all knew what had happened
+during the night.
+
+There was a very genuine grief, though none knew Marjory as I had known
+her; the more emotional wept, the older ones indulged in little
+semi-pious conventional comments, oddly foreign to their usual tone;
+all--even the most thoughtless--felt the same hush and awe overtake
+them.
+
+I could not cry; I felt nothing, except a dull rage at my own
+insensibility. Marjory was dead--and I had no tears.
+
+Morning school was a mere pretence that day; we dreaded, for almost the
+first time, to see the Doctor's face, but he did not show himself, and
+the arrangements necessary for the breaking-up of the school were made
+by the matron.
+
+Some, including Ormsby and myself, could not be taken in for some days,
+during which we had to remain at the school: days of shadow and
+monotony, with occasional ghastly outbreaks of the high spirits which
+nothing could repress, even in that house of mourning.
+
+But the time passed at last, until it was the evening of the day on
+which Marjory had been left to her last sleep.
+
+The poor father and mother had been unable to stay in the house now that
+it no longer covered even what had been their child; and the only two,
+besides the matron and a couple of servants who still remained there,
+were Ormsby and I, who were both to leave on the following morning.
+
+I would rather have been alone just then with anyone but Ormsby, though
+he had never since that fatal night taken the slightest notice of me; he
+looked worn and haggard to a degree that made me sure he must have cared
+more for Marjory than I could have imagined, and yet he would break at
+times into a feverish gaiety which surprised and repelled me.
+
+He was in one of these latter moods that evening, as we sat, as far
+apart as possible, in the empty, firelit schoolroom.
+
+'Now, Cameron,' he said, as he came up to me and struck me boisterously
+on the shoulder, 'wake up, man! I've been in the blues long enough. We
+can't go on moping always, on the night before the holidays, too! Do
+something to make yourself sociable--talk, can't you?'
+
+'No, I can't,' I said; and, breaking from him, went to one of the
+windows and looked vacantly out into blackness, which reflected the long
+room, with its dingy greenish maps, and the desks and forms glistening
+in the fire-beams.
+
+The ice-bound state in which I had been so long was slowly passing away,
+now that the scene by the little grave that raw, cheerless morning had
+brought home remorselessly the truth that Marjory was indeed gone--lost
+to me for ever.
+
+I could see now what she had been to me; how she had made my great
+loneliness endurable; how, with her innocent, fearless nature, she had
+tried to rouse me from spiritless and unmanly dejection. And I could
+never hope to please her now by proving that I had learnt the lesson;
+she had gone from me to some world infinitely removed, in which I was
+forgotten, and my pitiful trials and struggles could be nothing to her
+any more!
+
+I was once more alone, and this second bereavement revived in all its
+crushing desolation the first bitter loss which it so closely followed.
+
+So, as I stood there at the window, my unnatural calm could hold out no
+longer; the long-frozen tears thawed, and I could weep for the first
+time since Marjory died.
+
+But I was not allowed to sorrow undisturbed; I felt a rough grasp on my
+arm, as Ormsby asked me angrily, 'What's the matter now?'
+
+'Oh, Marjory, come to me!' I could only cry; 'I can't bear it! I can't!
+I can't!'
+
+'Stop that, do you hear?' he said savagely, 'I won't have it! Who are
+you to cry about her, when--but for _you_----'
+
+He got no farther; the bitter truth in such a taunt, coming from him,
+stung me to ungovernable rage. I turned and struck him full in the
+mouth, which I cut open with my clenched hand.
+
+His eyes became all pupil. 'You shall pay me for that!' he said through
+his teeth; and, forcing me against a desk, he caught up a large T-square
+which lay near; he was far the stronger, and I felt myself powerless in
+his grasp. Passion and pain had made him beside himself for the moment,
+and he did not know how formidable a weapon the heavily-weighted
+instrument might become in his hand.
+
+I shut my eyes: I think I rather hoped he would kill me, and then
+perhaps I might go where Marjory was. I did not cry for help, and it
+would have been useless if I had done so, for the schoolroom was a long
+way from the kitchen and offices of that rambling old house.
+
+But before the expected blow was dealt I felt his grasp relax, and heard
+the instrument fall with a sudden clatter on the floor. 'Look,' he
+whispered, in a voice I did not recognise, '_look there_!'
+
+And when I opened my eyes, I saw Marjory standing between us!
+
+She looked just as I had always seen her: I suppose that even the
+after-life could not make Marjory look purer, or more lovely than she
+was on earth. My first feeling was a wild conviction that it had all
+been some strange mistake--that Marjory was not dead.
+
+'Marjory, Marjory!' I cried in my joy, 'is it really you? You have come
+back, after all, and it is not true!'
+
+She looked at us both without speaking for a moment; her dear brown eyes
+had lost their old childish sparkle, and were calm and serious as if
+with a deeper knowledge.
+
+Ormsby had cowered back to the opposite wall, covering his face. 'Go
+away!' he gasped. 'Cameron--_you_ ask her to go. She--she liked you....
+I never meant it. Tell her I never meant to do it!'
+
+I could not understand such terror at the sight of Marjory, even if she
+had been what he thought her; but there was a reason in his case.
+
+'You were going to hurt Cameron,' said Marjory, at length, and her voice
+sounded sad and grave and far-away.
+
+'I don't care, Marjory,' I cried, 'not now you are here!'
+
+She motioned me back: 'You must not come nearer,' she said. 'I cannot
+stay long, and I must speak to Ormsby. Ormsby, have you told anyone?'
+
+'No,' he said, shaking all over, 'it could do no good.... I thought I
+needn't.'
+
+'Tell _him_,' said Marjory.
+
+'Must I? Oh, no, no!' he groaned, 'don't make me do that!'
+
+'You must,' she answered, and he turned to me with a sullen fear.
+
+'It was like this,' he began; 'that night, when I was waiting for you
+down there--I had some string, and it struck me, all in a moment, that
+it would be fun to trip you up. I didn't mean to hurt you--only frighten
+you. I fastened the string across a little way from the bottom. And
+then'--he had to moisten his lips before he could go on--'then _she_
+came down, and I tried to catch her--and couldn't--no, I couldn't!'
+
+'Is that all?' asked Marjory, as he stopped short.
+
+'I cut the string and hid it before you came. Now you know, and you may
+tell if you like!'
+
+'Cameron, you will never tell, will you--as long as he lives?' said
+Marjory. 'You must promise.'
+
+I was horrified by what I had heard; but her eyes were upon me, and I
+promised.
+
+'And you, Ormsby, promise me to be kinder to him after this.'
+
+He could not speak; but he made a sign of assent.
+
+'And now,' said Marjory, 'shake hands with him and forgive him.'
+
+But I revolted: 'No, Marjory, I can't; not now--when I know this!'
+
+'Cameron, dear,' she said, 'you won't let me go away sorry, will you?
+and I must go so soon. For my sake, when I wish it so!'
+
+I went to Ormsby, and took his cold, passive hand. 'I do forgive him,
+Marjory,' I said.
+
+She smiled brightly at us both. 'And you won't forget, either of you?'
+she said. 'And, Douglas, you will be brave, and take your own part now.
+Good-bye, good-bye.'
+
+I tried to reach her. 'Don't leave me; take me with you, Marjory--dear,
+dear Marjory, don't go!' But there was only firelit space where she had
+stood, though the sound of her pleading, pathetic voice was still in the
+air.
+
+Ormsby remained for a few minutes leaning against a desk, with his face
+buried in his arms, and I heard him struggling with his sobs. At last he
+rose, and left the room without a word.
+
+But I stayed there where I had last seen Marjory, till the fire died
+down, and the hour was late, for I was glad to be alone with the new and
+solemn joy that had come to me. For she had not forgotten me where she
+was; I had been allowed to see her once more, and it might even be that
+I should see her again. And I resolved then that when she came she
+should find me more worthy of her.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+From that night my character seemed to enter upon a new phase, and when
+I returned to school it was to begin my second term under better
+auspices.
+
+My cousins had welcomed me cordially among them, and as I mastered the
+lesson of give and take, of respecting one's self in respecting others,
+which I needed to learn, my early difficulties vanished with the
+weakness that had produced them.
+
+By Ormsby I was never again molested; in word and deed, he was true to
+the promise exacted from him during that last strange scene. At first,
+he avoided me as being too painfully connected with the past; but by
+degrees, as he recognised that his secret was safe in my keeping, we
+grew to understand one another better, although it would be too much to
+say that we ever became intimate.
+
+After he went to Sandhurst I lost sight of him, and only a few months
+since the news of his death in the Soudan, where he fell gallantly, made
+me sorrowfully aware that we should never meet again.
+
+I had a lingering fancy that Marjory might appear to me once more, but I
+have long since given up all hope of that in this life, and for what may
+come after I am content to wait.
+
+But the charge my child-friend had undertaken was completed on the night
+she was allowed to return to earth and determine the crisis of two
+lives; there is nothing now to call the bright and gracious little
+spirit back, for her influence will remain always.
+
+
+     _Spottiswoode & Co. Printers, New-street Square, London_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+WORKS BY F. ANSTEY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+SECOND EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6_s._
+
+THE TALKING HORSE;
+
+AND OTHER TALES.
+
++From THE DAILY CHRONICLE.+--'Full of quaintnesses, fun about dogs and
+boys, and with now and then a graver touch.... Stories which no one but
+the author of "Vice Versâ" could have produced.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+FOURTH EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6_s._
+
+THE GIANT'S ROBE.
+
++From THE PALL MALL GAZETTE.+--'The main interest of the book, which is
+very strong indeed, begins when Vincent returns, when Harold Caffyn
+discovers the secret, when every page threatens to bring down doom on
+the head of the miserable Mark. Will he confess? Will he drown himself?
+Will Vincent denounce him? Will Caffyn inform on him? Will his wife
+abandon him?--we ask eagerly as we read, and cannot cease reading till
+the puzzle is solved in a series of exciting situations.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+POPULAR EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6_s._
+
+CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2_s._ 6_d._
+
+THE PARIAH.
+
++From THE SATURDAY REVIEW.+--'In "The Pariah" we are more than ever
+struck by the sharp intuitive perception and the satirical balancing of
+judgment which makes the author's writings such extremely entertaining
+reading. There is not a dull page--we might say, not a dull sentence--in
+it.... The girls are delightfully drawn, especially the bewitching
+Margot and the childish Lettice. Nothing that polish and finish,
+cleverness, humour, wit, and sarcasm can give is left out.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2_s._ 6_d._
+
+VICE VERSÂ;
+
+OR, A LESSON TO FATHERS.
+
++From THE SATURDAY REVIEW.+--'If ever there was a book made up from
+beginning to end of laughter, and yet not a comic book, or a "merry"
+book, or a book of jokes, or a book of pictures, or a jest book, or a
+tomfool book, but a perfectly sober and serious book, in the reading of
+which a sober man may laugh without shame from beginning to end, it is
+the new book called "Vice Versâ; or, a Lesson to Fathers."... We close
+the book, recommending it very earnestly to all fathers in the first
+instance, and their sons, nephews, uncles, and male cousins next.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2_s._ 6_d._
+
+A FALLEN IDOL.
+
++From THE TIMES.+--'Mr. Anstey's new story will delight the
+multitudinous public that laughed over "Vice Versâ."... The boy who
+brings the accursed image to Champion's house, Mr. Bales, the artist's
+factotum, and above all Mr. Yarker, the ex-butler who has turned
+policeman, are figures whom it is as pleasant to meet as it is
+impossible to forget.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+NOVELS BY THE AUTHOR OF 'MEHALAH.'
+
+_Fcp. 8vo. Pictorial boards, 2s. each; or limp red cloth, 2s. 6d. each._
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+MEHALAH:
+
+A STORY OF THE SALT MARSHES.
+
+'The book is one of the most powerful that has, so far as we know,
+appeared for many years. It will remind many readers of Emily Brontë's
+wonderful story, "Wuthering Heights," and indeed in some respects it is
+even more powerful.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+'"Mehalah" is far above the ordinary level of novels. The writer
+possesses strength, and strength is one of the rarest qualities in
+modern fiction.'--DAILY NEWS.
+
+'A bit of real romance: original, violent, powerful, novel both in place
+and circumstance, and peculiarly impressive.'--TRUTH.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+JOHN HERRING:
+
+A WEST OF ENGLAND ROMANCE.
+
+'Among most novels of the day "John Herring" is a very considerable work
+indeed, and both deserves and will receive proportionate
+attention.'--PALL MALL GAZETTE.
+
+'Far, very far, above the level of ordinary novels.'--ACADEMY.
+
+'A powerful and interesting novel. The English is admirable; there is
+great freshness and vigour in the descriptions of scenery and character,
+and in the narrative there is abundance of invention, and many of the
+situations are extremely dramatic.... A book of unusual originality and
+power.'--TIMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+COURT ROYAL.
+
+'"Court Royal" is among the few novels of our time that deserve, and
+will probably obtain, life beyond its day. Intellect, knowledge, fancy,
+and humour have gone to its making, and thought besides.'--GRAPHIC.
+
+'The story holds the reader under a spell which is unbroken from first
+to last.'--MORNING POST.
+
+'It is difficult to say which is the most striking feature of this
+remarkable and welcome novel--the quaint humour, the consummate power,
+or the freshness.'--VANITY FAIR.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+THE GAVEROCKS.
+
+'Marked by the vigour of style the freshness of invention, and the
+dramatic power which have gained this talented writer his
+reputation.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+'A tale of vivid and well-sustained interest.'--GUARDIAN.
+
+'The story is one of deep human interest, while the intensity of its
+local colouring enhances its intrinsic merit.'--MORNING POST.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+RICHARD CABLE,
+
+THE LIGHTSHIPMAN.
+
+'A novel essentially readable, and full of life and colour.'--DAILY
+TELEGRAPH.
+
+'The story has a strong interest, which is likely to prove enduring. It
+is as good as anything this powerful writer has produced.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The 'MOLLY BAWN' SERIES of POPULAR NOVELS
+
+Works by the Author of 'MOLLY BAWN,' 'GREEN PLEASURE AND GREY GRIEF,'
+&c. &c.
+
+_In Pictorial Covers, fcp. 8vo. 2s.; or, in limp red cloth, fcp. 8vo.
+2s. 6d. each._
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+PHYLLIS: A NOVEL.
+
+'A clever and interesting novel.'--SPECTATOR. 'Very pleasant
+writing.'--QUEEN.
+
+
+MOLLY BAWN.
+
+'Really an attractive novel, idealising human life without departing
+from the truth, and depicting the love of a tender, feminine, yet
+high-spirited girl in a most touching manner. Full of wit, spirit, and
+gaiety. All women will envy and all men will fall in love with her.
+Higher praise we surely cannot give.'--ATHENÆUM.
+
+
+'AIRY FAIRY LILIAN.'
+
+'A delightful story, cast in the same mould as its predecessors. The
+characters are cleverly drawn, the dialogue is terse and
+pointed.'--COURT JOURNAL.
+
+
+MRS. GEOFFREY.
+
+'A prettier or more readable story than "Mrs. Geoffrey" nobody need wish
+to meet with.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+
+ROSSMOYNE.
+
+'Monica Beresford is a very pretty example of Irish _naïveté_
+dissociated from shilleaghs; and there is true humour in the conception
+of Kit, her sister.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+DORIS.
+
+'"Doris" is a clever story of a marriage of convenience.... The dialogue
+is good: that of "Dicky Browne," a kind of licensed jester, being really
+bright and lively. The heroine is well drawn, and so is a terrible aunt
+of hers, whose encounters with the Marquis (himself a clever portrait)
+are diverting.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+GREEN PLEASURE AND GREY GRIEF.
+
+'"Green Pleasure and Grey Grief" is what many of its readers will be
+inclined to call a sweetly pretty story.'--ATHENÆUM.
+
+
+PORTIA.
+
+'"Portia, or by Passions Rocked," is of the category of novels to which
+may fairly be applied the epithet of "charming."'--MORNING POST.
+
+
+BEAUTY'S DAUGHTERS.
+
+'Another triumph.... Of the success of the story there can hardly be any
+doubt.' COURT JOURNAL.
+
+
+FAITH AND UNFAITH.
+
+'A singularly bright, vivacious, readable story.'--ILLUSTRATED LONDON
+NEWS.
+
+'Distinctly superior to three-fourths of the fiction
+published.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+LADY BRANKSMERE.
+
+'.... Sufficiently sensational to suit the most ardent admirers of
+fiction, and yet contains much that is worthy of admiration.'--COURT
+JOURNAL.
+
+
+LOYS, LORD BERRESFORD, and other Tales.
+
+'A collection of stories which cannot fail to be popular. There is
+something good in all of them, and one or two are especially racy and
+piquant.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+UNDER-CURRENTS.
+
+'Altogether as enjoyable as one is accustomed to expect from the clever
+author of "Molly Bawn."'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+NOVELS BY GEORGE GISSING.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Fcp. 8vo. Pictorial boards, 2s. each; or limp red cloth, 2s. 6d. each._
+
+
+DEMOS:
+
+A STORY OF SOCIALIST LIFE IN ENGLAND.
+
+'If a tale of Socialism does not find abundance of readers, it is not
+because the times are not ripe for it. This remarkable novel presents
+the great social problem in a striking garb.... "Demos" does not aspire
+to vie with "Alton Locke," but it tells a story more practical, and of
+more brightness and variety.'--TIMES.
+
+'A really able and vigorous romance.'--ATHENÆUM.
+
+'This is a novel of very considerable ability.... It is evidently
+written by a man who has a very intimate knowledge of the working
+classes, and not a little sympathy with them.... Nothing can be more
+skilful than the sketch of the artisan family round whose fortunes the
+story of the book revolves. The chief character is very powerfully
+drawn.... His mother too, with her narrow, complaining, and almost dumb
+integrity, ... the weak, pretty daughter, and the worthless, blackguard
+son, are hardly less truthful studies.... The sketch of the one or two
+Socialist meetings which the author has occasion to describe, of the
+style of Socialist literature, and the conversation of Socialist
+agitators, shows an intimate knowledge of that field of
+action.'--SPECTATOR.
+
+
+A LIFE'S MORNING.
+
+'Powerful and unique, as all Mr. Gissing's former writings are. "A
+Life's Morning" is his _chef-d'oeuvre_.... The story is most
+fascinating and most natural.' WHITEHALL REVIEW.
+
+'As a study of feminine nature, "A Life's Morning" is, perhaps, the most
+successful of all Mr. Gissing's works, and deserves to be fully as
+popular as its predecessors.' PALL MALL GAZETTE.
+
+'A story which is marked by imaginative insight, subtle delineation of
+character, epigrammatic force of style, and gleams of genuine
+humour.'--STANDARD.
+
+
+THE NETHER WORLD.
+
+'Terrible in its earnestness, in its "untouched" photography of the
+desperate struggles and bitter misery of the London poor; never was
+word-painting more thoroughly and obviously true.'--WORLD.
+
+'Mr. Gissing is one of the few persons who can handle pitch without
+being defiled by it. While he runs Zola close as a realist, his thoughts
+and language are as pure as those of Miss Yonge herself.'--STANDARD.
+
+'A powerful and most interesting novel.'--MANCHESTER GUARDIAN.
+
+
+_Crown 8vo. 6s._
+
+THYRZA.
+
+'A very good story indeed.... In power and pathetic treatment the novel
+is above the average.'--ATHENÆUM.
+
+'Thyrza is a really exquisite figure; as pathetic a creation as can well
+be imagined.... In short, "Thyrza" is a book of unusual literary
+merit.'--MORNING POST.
+
+
+_Crown 8vo. 6s._
+
+NEW GRUB STREET.
+
+'Mr. Gissing's writing is bright and strong, his humour is delightful,
+and his satire is easy and yet restrained.'--SPEAKER.
+
+'Mr. Gissing has produced a very powerful book.... Full of clever
+touches on literary and social matters.'--SATURDAY REVIEW.
+
+'The book is decidedly forcible, and, to a great extent, the result of
+experience.' ATHENÆUM.
+
+'Mr. Gissing's new book is the best bit of work he has done since
+"Thyrza." In none of his recent novels has there been such reality of
+feeling, such pathos, such careful yet broad analysis of character. Mr.
+Gissing's characters are real living men and women; they are drawn with
+great skill, sympathy, and truth.'--GUARDIAN.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+ILLUSTRATED EDITIONS
+
+OF
+
+POPULAR WORKS.
+
+Handsomely bound in cloth gilt, each volume containing
+
+Four Illustrations. Crown 8vo. 3s. 6d. each.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
++THE SMALL HOUSE AT ALLINGTON.+ By ANTHONY TROLLOPE
+
++FRAMLEY PARSONAGE.+ By ANTHONY TROLLOPE
+
++THE CLAVERINGS.+ By ANTHONY TROLLOPE
+
++TRANSFORMATION:+ a Romance. By NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE.
+
++DOMESTIC STORIES.+ By the Author of 'John Halifax, Gentleman.'
+
++THE MOORS AND THE FENS.+ By Mrs. J. H. RIDDELL.
+
++WITHIN THE PRECINCTS.+ By Mrs. OLIPHANT.
+
++CARITÀ.+ By Mrs. OLIPHANT.
+
++FOR PERCIVAL.+ By MARGARET VELEY.
+
++NO NEW THING.+ By W. E. NORRIS.
+
++LOVE THE DEBT.+ By RICHARD ASHE KING ('Basil').
+
++WIVES AND DAUGHTERS.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++NORTH AND SOUTH.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++SYLVIA'S LOVERS.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++CRANFORD, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++MARY BARTON, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++RUTH; THE GREY WOMAN, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++LIZZIE LEIGH; A DARK NIGHT'S WORK, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+ILLUSTRATED EDITION
+
+OF THE
+
+LIFE AND WORKS
+
+OF
+
+CHARLOTTE BRONTË
+
+(CURRER BELL),
+
+AND HER SISTERS
+
+EMILY AND ANNE BRONTË
+
+(ELLIS AND ACTON BELL).
+
+In Seven Volumes, Large Crown 8vo. handsomely bound in cloth.
+
+_Price 5s. per Volume._
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The descriptions in 'Jane Eyre' and the other Fictions by Charlotte
+Brontë and her Sisters being mostly of actual places, the Publishers
+considered that Views were the most suitable Illustrations for the
+Novels. They were indebted for a clue to the real names of the most
+interesting scenes to a friend of the Brontë family, who enabled the
+artist, Mr. G. M. Wimperis, to identify the places described. He made
+faithful sketches of them on the spot, and drew them on wood.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+1.--+JANE EYRE.+ By Charlotte Brontë. With Five Illustrations.
+LOWOOD.
+GATESHEAD HALL.
+THORNFIELD HALL.
+MOOR HOUSE.
+FERNDEAN MANOR.
+
+2.--+SHIRLEY.+ By Charlotte Brontë. With Five Illustrations.
+YORKE'S HOUSE.
+NUNNELY COMMON AND WOOD.
+FIELDHEAD HALL.
+HOLLOW'S MILL.
+BRIARFIELD CHURCH.
+
+3.--+VILLETTE.+ By Charlotte Brontë. With Five Illustrations.
+THE PARK, BRUSSELS.
+DOME OF ST. PAUL'S.
+PENSIONNAT DES DEMOISELLES, BRUSSELS.
+GARDEN IN THE RUE FOSSETTE.
+GRANDE PLACE, BRUSSELS.
+
+4.--+THE PROFESSOR, and POEMS.+ By Charlotte Brontë. With Poems by
+her Sisters and Father. With Five Illustrations.
+VIEW FROM CRIMSWORTH HALL.
+HOUSE IN DAISY LANE.
+RUE ROYALE, BRUSSELS.
+PROTESTANT CEMETERY.
+VIEW OF THE MOORS.
+
+5.--+WUTHERING HEIGHTS.+ By Emily Brontë. +AGNES GREY.+ By Anne
+Brontë. With a Preface and Biographical Notice of both Authors, by
+Charlotte Brontë. With Five Illustrations.
+HAWORTH CHURCH AND PARSONAGE.
+VALLEY OF GIMMERTON.
+WUTHERING HEIGHTS.
+THE MOORS.
+HORTON LODGE.
+
+6.--+THE TENANT OF WILDFELL HALL.+ By Anne Brontë. With Five
+Illustrations.
+WILDFELL HALL.
+GRASSDALE MANOR.
+HARRINGBY HALL.
+ON THE MOORS.
+WILDFELL HALL (_second view_).
+
+7.--+LIFE OF CHARLOTTE BRONTË.+ By Mrs. Gaskell. With Seven
+Illustrations.
+PORTRAIT OF CHARLOTTE BRONTË.
+PORTRAIT OF THE REV. PATRICK BRONTË.
+CASTERTON SCHOOL.
+ROE HEAD.
+HAWORTH PARSONAGE.
+THE BRONTË WATERFALL.
+FACSIMILE OF A SKETCH BY PATRICK BRANWELL BRONTË.
+
+*** The Volumes are also to be had in small post 8vo. limp cloth, price
+2s. 6d. each; or in small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with
+Frontispiece to each volume, cut or uncut edges, price 1s. 6d. each.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+POPULAR NOVELS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Each Work complete in One Volume, Crown 8vo._
+
+_price Six Shillings._
+
++NEW GRUB STREET.+ By GEORGE GISSING.
+
++EIGHT DAYS.+ By R. E. FORREST, Author of 'The Touchstone of Peril.'
+
++A DRAUGHT OF LETHE.+ By ROY TELLET, Author of 'The Outcasts' &c.
+
++THE RAJAH'S HEIR.+ By a New Author.
+
++THE PARIAH.+ By F. ANSTEY, Author of 'Vice Versâ' &c.
+
++THYRZA.+ By GEORGE GISSING, Author of 'Demos' &c.
+
++THE NETHER WORLD.+ By GEORGE GISSING, Author of 'Demos' &c.
+
++ROBERT ELSMERE.+ By Mrs. HUMPHRY WARD, Author of 'Miss Bretherton' &c.
+
++RICHARD CABLE+: the Lightshipman. By the Author of 'Mehalah,' 'John
+Herring,' 'Court Royal,' &c.
+
++THE GAVEROCKS.+ By the Author of 'Mehalah,' 'John Herring,' 'Court
+Royal,' &c.
+
++DEMOS+: a Story of Socialist Life in England. By GEORGE GISSING, Author
+of 'Thyrza' &c.
+
++A FALLEN IDOL.+ By F. ANSTEY, Author of 'Vice Versâ' &c.
+
++THE GIANT'S ROBE.+ By F. ANSTEY, Author of 'Vice Versâ' &c.
+
++OLD KENSINGTON.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++THE VILLAGE ON THE CLIFF.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++FIVE OLD FRIENDS AND A YOUNG PRINCE.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++TO ESTHER, and other Sketches.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++BLUEBEARD'S KEYS, and other Stories.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++THE STORY OF ELIZABETH; TWO HOURS; FROM AN ISLAND.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++TOILERS AND SPINSTERS.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++MISS ANGEL; FULHAM LAWN.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++MISS WILLIAMSON'S DIVAGATIONS.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++MRS. DYMOND.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++LLANALY REEFS.+ By Lady VERNEY, Author of 'Stone Edge' &c.
+
++LETTICE LISLE.+ By Lady VERNEY. With 3 Illustrations.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+
+POCKET EDITIONS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+W. M. THACKERAY'S WORKS.
+
+In Twenty-seven Volumes. Price 1_s._ 6_d._ each in half-cloth,
+cut or uncut edges; or 1_s._ in paper cover.
+
+*** _The set of Twenty-seven Volumes can also be had in a handsome
+ebonised case. Height is 17 inches, width 12 inches, depth 4¾ inches.
+Price £2. 12s. 6d._
+
+'A perfect and marvellously cheap edition.' Spectator.
+
+'Neat, handy, and pretty little books.' SATURDAY REVIEW.
+
+TITLES OF THE VOLUMES.
+
+VANITY FAIR. 2 vols.
+
+The HISTORY of PENDENNIS. 2 vols.
+
+The MEMOIRS of BARRY LYNDON:
+A Little Dinner at Timmins's.
+
+The NEWCOMES. 2 vols.
+
+The HISTORY of HENRY ESMOND.
+
+The VIRGINIANS. 2 vols.
+
+The ADVENTURES of PHILIP, to which is prefixed A SHABBY GENTEEL STORY.
+2 vols.
+
+The IRISH SKETCH-BOOK.
+
+The GREAT HOGGARTY DIAMOND. The HISTORY of the NEXT FRENCH REVOLUTION.
+CRUIKSHANK and LEECH. COX'S DIARY. The BEDFORD ROW CONSPIRACY.
+
+MAJOR GAHAGAN. The FATAL BOOTS. MEN'S WIVES. The SECOND FUNERAL of
+NAPOLEON.
+
+The YELLOWPLUSH PAPERS. CATHERINE.
+
+The FITZBOODLE PAPERS. CHARACTER SKETCHES. TALES. PAPERS by the FAT
+CONTRIBUTOR. Miss TICKLETOBY'S LECTURES on ENGLISH HISTORY.
+
+The BOOK of SNOBS. NOVELS by EMINENT HANDS. SULTAN STORK, and other
+Papers.
+
+LOVEL the WIDOWER. The WOLVES and the LAMB. NOTES of a JOURNEY from
+CORNHILL to GRAND CAIRO.
+
+BALLADS. A LEGEND of the RHINE. The DIARY of C. JEAMES DE LA PLUCHE,
+Esq., with his Letters.
+
+ROUNDABOUT PAPERS. LITTLE TRAVELS and ROADSIDE-SKETCHES.
+
+The CHRISTMAS BOOKS of Mr. M. A. TITMARSH. 2 vols. CONTENTS:--Mrs.
+Perkins' Ball--Our Street--Dr. Birch and his Young Friends--Rebecca and
+Rowena--The Rose and the Ring--The Kickleburys on the Rhine.
+
+SKETCHES and TRAVELS in LONDON; and MISCELLANEOUS CONTRIBUTIONS to
+'PUNCH.'
+
+The FOUR GEORGES; and The ENGLISH HUMORISTS of the EIGHTEENTH CENTURY.
+
+The PARIS SKETCH-BOOK; and A LECTURE on CHARITY and HUMOUR.
+
+DENIS DUVAL; and MISCELLANEOUS ESSAYS, SKETCHES, and REVIEWS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Small fcp. 8vo. half-cloth, cut or uncut edges, One Shilling.
+
+POEMS BY ELIZABETH BARRETT BROWNING.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut edges, price One
+Shilling.
+
+POCKET VOLUME OF SELECTIONS FROM THE POETICAL WORKS OF ROBERT BROWNING.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LIFE AND WORKS OF CHARLOTTE BRONTË
+
+(CURRER BELL) and her Sisters EMILY and ANNE BRONTË (ELLIS and ACTON
+BELL). Seven small Fcp. 8vo. Volumes, each containing a Frontispiece,
+bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut edges, price 1_s._ 6_d._ per
+volume.
+
+TITLES OF THE VOLUMES:--JANE EYRE.--SHIRLEY.--VILLETTE.--The PROFESSOR
+and POEMS.--WUTHERING HEIGHTS and AGNES GREY.--TENANT of WILDFELL
+HALL.--LIFE of CHARLOTTE BRONTË.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+MRS. GASKELL'S WORKS.
+
+Eight Volumes, small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut
+edges, price 1_s._ 6_d._ per volume.
+
+TITLES OF THE VOLUMES:--WIVES and DAUGHTERS.--NORTH and SOUTH.--SYLVIA'S
+LOVERS.--CRANFORD, and other Tales.--MARY BARTON, and
+other Tales.--RUTH, and other Tales.--A DARK NIGHT'S WORK, and
+other Tales.--MY LADY LUDLOW, and other Tales.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Talking Horse, by F. Anstey
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+<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml">
+  <head>
+    <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" />
+    <title>
+      The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Talking Horse and other tales, by F. Anstey.
+    </title>
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+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Talking Horse, by F. Anstey
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Talking Horse
+       And Other Tales
+
+Author: F. Anstey
+
+Release Date: November 16, 2008 [EBook #27284]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TALKING HORSE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Clarke, Martin Pettit and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This
+file was produced from images generously made available
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+</pre>
+
+
+<h1>THE TALKING HORSE</h1>
+
+<h3>AND OTHER TALES</h3>
+
+<p class="tbrk">&nbsp;</p>
+
+<h3>BY</h3>
+
+<h2>F. ANSTEY</h2>
+
+<h4>AUTHOR OF 'VICE VERS&Acirc;' 'THE GIANT'S ROBE'<br />'THE PARIAH' ETC.</h4>
+
+<p class="tbrk">&nbsp;</p>
+
+<h3>SECOND EDITION</h3>
+
+<p class="tbrk">&nbsp;</p>
+
+<h3>LONDON<br />SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 WATERLOO PLACE<br />1892</h3>
+
+<h4>[<i>All rights reserved</i>]</h4>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p class="tbrk">&nbsp;</p>
+
+<h2>PREFACE</h2>
+
+<p>These stories originally appeared in 'Macmillan's,' 'Longman's,'
+'Atalanta,' 'The Cornhill,' 'The Graphic,' 'Aunt Judy's,' 'The
+Reflector,' and Unwin's 'Christmas Annual,' respectively.</p>
+
+<p class="right">F. A.</p>
+
+<p class="tbrk">&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h2>CONTENTS</h2>
+
+<div class="index">
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#THE_TALKING_HORSE">THE TALKING HORSE</a></li>
+<li><a href="#THE_GOOD_LITTLE_GIRL">THE GOOD LITTLE GIRL</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_MATTER_OF_TASTE">A MATTER OF TASTE</a>
+<ul>
+	<li class="subitem"><a href="#PART1">PART I</a></li>
+	<li class="subitem"><a href="#PART11">PART II</a></li>
+</ul></li>
+<li><a href="#DON_THE_STORY_OF_A_GREEDY_DOG">DON; THE STORY OF A GREEDY DOG</a></li>
+<li><a href="#TAKEN_BY_SURPRISE">TAKEN BY SURPRISE</a></li>
+<li><a href="#PALEFACE_AND_REDSKIN">PALEFACE AND REDSKIN</a>
+<ul>
+	<li class="subitem"><a href="#ACT_THE_FIRST">ACT THE FIRST</a></li>
+	<li class="subitem"><a href="#ACT_THE_SECOND">ACT THE SECOND</a></li>
+	<li class="subitem"><a href="#ACT_THE_THIRD">ACT THE THIRD</a></li>
+</ul></li>
+<li><a href="#SHUT_OUT">SHUT OUT</a></li>
+<li><a href="#TOMMYS_HERO">TOMMY'S HERO</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CANINE_ISHMAEL">A CANINE ISHMAEL</a></li>
+<li><a href="#MARJORY">MARJORY</a></li>
+</ul>
+</div>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[Pg 1]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="THE_TALKING_HORSE" id="THE_TALKING_HORSE"></a><i>THE TALKING HORSE</i></h2>
+
+<p>It was on the way to Sandown Park that I met him first, on that horribly
+wet July afternoon when Bendigo won the Eclipse Stakes. He sat opposite
+to me in the train going down, and my attention was first attracted to
+him by the marked contrast between his appearance and his attire: he had
+not thought fit to adopt the regulation costume for such occasions, and
+I think I never saw a man who had made himself more aggressively horsey.
+The mark of the beast was sprinkled over his linen: he wore snaffle
+sleeve-links, a hard hunting-hat, a Newmarket coat, and extremely tight
+trousers. And with all this, he fell as far short of the genuine
+sportsman as any stage super who ever wore his spurs upside down in a
+hunting-chorus. His expression was mild and inoffensive, and his watery
+pale eyes and receding chin gave one the idea that he was hardly to be
+trusted astride anything more spirited than a gold-headed cane. And yet,
+somehow, he aroused compassion rather than any sense of the ludicrous:
+he had that look of shrinking self-effacement which comes of a recent
+humiliation, and, in spite of all extravagances, he was obviously a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[Pg 2]</a></span>
+gentleman; while something in his manner indicated that his natural
+tendency would, once at all events, have been to avoid any kind of
+extremes.</p>
+
+<p>He puzzled and interested me so much that I did my best to enter into
+conversation with him, only to be baffled by the jerky embarrassment
+with which he met all advances, and when we got out at Esher, curiosity
+led me to keep him still in view.</p>
+
+<p>Evidently he had not come with any intention of making money. He avoided
+the grand stand, with the bookmakers huddling in couples, like hoarse
+lovebirds; he kept away from the members' inclosure, where the Guards'
+band was endeavouring to defy the elements which emptied their vials
+into the brazen instruments; he drifted listlessly about the course till
+the clearing-bell rang, and it seemed as if he was searching for some
+one whom he only wished to discover in order to avoid.</p>
+
+<p>Sandown, it must be admitted, was not as gay as usual that day, with its
+'deluged park' and 'unsummer'd sky,' its waterproofed toilettes and
+massed umbrellas, whose sides gleamed livid as they caught the
+light&mdash;but there was a general determination to ignore the unseasonable
+dampness as far as possible, and an excitement over the main event of
+the day which no downpour could quench.</p>
+
+<p>The Ten Thousand was run: ladies with marvellously confected bonnets
+lowered their umbrellas without a murmur, and smart men on drags shook
+hands<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[Pg 3]</a></span> effusively as, amidst a frantic roar of delight, Bendigo strode
+past the post. The moment after, I looked round for my incongruous
+stranger, and saw him engaged in a well-meant attempt to press a currant
+bun upon a carriage-horse tethered to one of the trees&mdash;a feat of
+abstraction which, at such a time, was only surpassed by that of
+Archimedes at the sack of Syracuse.</p>
+
+<p>After that I could no longer control my curiosity&mdash;I felt I must speak
+to him again, and I made an opportunity later, as we stood alone on a
+stand which commanded the finish of one of the shorter courses, by
+suggesting that he should share my umbrella.</p>
+
+<p>Before accepting he glanced suspiciously at me through the rills that
+streamed from his unprotected hat-brim. 'I'm afraid,' I said, 'it is
+rather like shutting the stable-door after the steed is stolen.'</p>
+
+<p>He started. 'He <i>was</i> stolen, then,' he cried; 'so you have heard?'</p>
+
+<p>I explained that I had only used an old proverb which I thought might
+appeal to him, and he sighed heavily.</p>
+
+<p>'I was misled for the moment,' he said: 'you have guessed, then, that I
+have been accustomed to horses?'</p>
+
+<p>'You have hardly made any great secret of it.'</p>
+
+<p>'The fact is,' he said, instantly understanding this allusion to his
+costume, 'I&mdash;I put on these things so<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[Pg 4]</a></span> as not to lose the habit of
+riding altogether&mdash;I have not been on horseback lately. At one time I
+used to ride constantly&mdash;constantly. I was a regular attendant in Rotten
+Row&mdash;until something occurred which shook my nerve, and I am only
+waiting now for the shock to subside.'</p>
+
+<p>I did not like to ask any questions, and we walked back to the station,
+and travelled up to Waterloo in company, without any further reference
+to the subject.</p>
+
+<p>As we were parting, however, he said, 'I wonder if you would care to
+hear my full story some day? I cannot help thinking it would interest
+you, and it would be a relief to me.'</p>
+
+<p>I was ready enough to hear whatever he chose to tell me; and persuaded
+him to dine with me at my rooms that evening, and unbosom himself
+afterwards, which he did to an extent for which I confess I was
+unprepared.</p>
+
+<p>That he himself implicitly believed in his own story, I could not doubt;
+and he told it throughout with the oddest mixture of vanity and modesty,
+and an obvious struggle between a dim perception of his own absurdity
+and the determination to spare himself in no single particular, which,
+though it did not overcome my scepticism, could not fail to enlist
+sympathy. But for all that, by the time he entered upon the more
+sensational part of his case, I was driven to form conclusions
+respecting it which, as they will probably<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[Pg 5]</a></span> force themselves upon the
+reader's own mind, I need not anticipate here.</p>
+
+<p>I give the story, as far as possible, in the words of its author; and
+have only to add that it would never have been published here without
+his full consent and approval.</p>
+
+<p class="tbrk">&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p>'My name,' said he, 'is Gustavus Pulvertoft. I have no occupation, and
+six hundred a year. I lived a quiet and contented bachelor until I was
+twenty-eight, and then I met Diana Chetwynd for the first time. We were
+spending Christmas at the same country-house, and it did not take me
+long to become the most devoted of her many adorers. She was one of the
+most variously accomplished girls I had ever met. She was a skilled
+musician, a brilliant amateur actress; she could give most men thirty
+out of a hundred at billiards, and her judgment and daring across the
+most difficult country had won her the warm admiration of all
+hunting-men. And she was neither fast nor horsey, seeming to find but
+little pleasure in the society of mere sportsmen, to whose conversation
+she infinitely preferred that of persons who, like myself, were rather
+agreeable than athletic. I was not at that time, whatever I may be now,
+without my share of good looks, and for some reason it pleased Miss
+Chetwynd to show me a degree of favour which she accorded to no other
+member of the house-party.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[Pg 6]</a></span></p><p>It was annoying to feel that my unfamiliarity with the open-air sports
+in which she delighted debarred me from her company to so great an
+extent; for it often happened that I scarcely saw her until the evening,
+when I sometimes had the bliss of sitting next to her at dinner; but on
+these occasions I could not help seeing that she found some pleasure in
+my society.</p>
+
+<p>I don't think I have mentioned that, besides being exquisitely lovely,
+Diana was an heiress, and it was not without a sense of my own
+presumption that I allowed myself to entertain the hope of winning her
+at some future day. Still, I was not absolutely penniless, and she was
+her own mistress, and I had some cause, as I have said, for believing
+that she was, at least, not ill-disposed towards me. It seemed a
+favourable sign, for instance, when she asked me one day why it was I
+never rode. I replied that I had not ridden for years&mdash;though I did not
+add that the exact number of those years was twenty-eight.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, but you must take it up again!' she said, with the prettiest air of
+imperiousness. 'You ought to ride in the Row next season.'</p>
+
+<p>'If I did,' I said, 'would you let me ride with you sometimes?'</p>
+
+<p>'We should meet, of course,' she said; 'and it is such a pity not to
+keep up your riding&mdash;you lose so much by not doing so.'</p>
+
+<p>Was I wrong in taking this as an intimation that,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[Pg 7]</a></span> by following her
+advice, I should not lose my reward? If you had seen her face as she
+spoke, you would have thought as I did then&mdash;as I do now.</p>
+
+<p>And so, with this incentive, I overcame any private misgivings, and soon
+after my return to town attended a fashionable riding-school near Hyde
+Park, with the fixed determination to acquire the whole art and mystery
+of horsemanship.</p>
+
+<p>That I found learning a pleasure I cannot conscientiously declare. I
+have passed happier hours than those I spent in cantering round four
+bare whitewashed walls on a snorting horse, with my interdicted stirrups
+crossed upon the saddle. The riding-master informed me from time to time
+that I was getting on, and I knew instinctively when I was coming off;
+but I must have made some progress, for my instructor became more
+encouraging. 'Why, when you come here first, Mr. Pulvertoft, sir, you
+were like a pair o' tongs on a wall, as they say; whereas now&mdash;well, you
+can tell yourself how you are,' he would say; though, even then, I
+occasionally had reason to regret that I was <i>not</i> on a wall. However, I
+persevered, inspired by the thought that each fresh horse I crossed (and
+some were very fresh indeed) represented one more barrier surmounted
+between myself and Diana, and encouraged by the discovery, after
+repeated experiments, that tan was rather soothing to fall upon than
+otherwise.</p>
+
+<p>When I walked in the Row, where a few horsemen<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[Pg 8]</a></span> were performing as
+harbingers of spring, I criticised their riding, which I thought
+indifferent, as they neglected nearly all the rules. I began to
+anticipate a day when I should exhibit a purer and more classic style of
+equestrianism. And one morning I saw Diana, who pulled up her dancing
+mare to ask me if I had remembered her advice, and I felt proudly able
+to reply that I should certainly make my appearance in the Row before
+very long.</p>
+
+<p>From that day I was perpetually questioning my riding-master as to when
+he considered I should be ripe enough for Rotten Row. He was dubious,
+but not actually dissuasive. 'It's like this, you see, sir,' he
+explained, 'if you get hold of a quiet, steady horse&mdash;why, you won't
+come to no harm; but if you go out on an animal that will take advantage
+of you, Mr. Pulvertoft, why, you'll be all no-how on him, sir.'</p>
+
+<p>They would have mounted me at the school; but I knew most of the stud
+there, and none of them quite came up to my ideal of a 'quiet, steady
+horse;' so I went to a neighbouring job-master, from whom I had
+occasionally hired a brougham, and asked to be shown an animal he could
+recommend to one who had not had much practice lately. He admitted
+candidly enough that most of his horses 'took a deal of riding,' but
+added that it so happened that he had one just then which would suit me
+'down to the ground'&mdash;a phrase which grated unpleasantly on my nerves,
+though I consented to see the horse. His aspect<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[Pg 9]</a></span> impressed me most
+favourably. He was a chestnut of noble proportions, with a hogged mane;
+but what reassured me was the expression of his eye, indicating as it
+did a self-respect and sagacity which one would hardly expect for seven
+and sixpence an hour.</p>
+
+<p>'You won't get a showier Park 'ack than what he is, not to be so quiet,'
+said his owner. 'He's what you may call a kind 'oss, and as gentle&mdash;you
+could ride him on a packthread.'</p>
+
+<p>I considered reins safer, but I was powerfully drawn towards the horse:
+he seemed to me to be sensible that he had a character to lose, and to
+possess too high an intelligence wilfully to forfeit his testimonials.
+With hardly a second thought, I engaged him for the following afternoon.</p>
+
+<p>I mounted at the stables, with just a passing qualm, perhaps, while my
+stirrup-leathers were being adjusted, and a little awkwardness in taking
+up my reins, which were more twisted than I could have wished; however,
+at length, I found myself embarked on the stream of traffic on the back
+of the chestnut&mdash;whose name, by the way, was Brutus.</p>
+
+<p>Shall I ever forget the pride and ecstasy of finding that I had my steed
+under perfect control, that we threaded the maze of carriages with
+absolute security? I turned him into the Park, and clucked my tongue: he
+broke into a canter, and how shall I describe my delight at the
+discovery that it was not uncomfortable? I said 'Woa,' and he stopped,
+so gradually<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[Pg 10]</a></span> that my equilibrium was not seriously disturbed; he
+trotted, and still I accommodated myself to his movements without any
+positive inconvenience. I could have embraced him for gratitude: never
+before had I been upon a beast whose paces were so easy, whose behaviour
+was so considerate. I could ride at last! or, which amounted to the same
+thing, I could ride the horse I was on, and I would 'use no other.' I
+was about to meet Diana Chetwynd, and need not fear even to encounter
+her critical eyes.</p>
+
+<p>We had crossed the Serpentine bridge, and were just turning in upon the
+Ride, when&mdash;and here I am only too conscious that what I am about to say
+may strike you as almost incredible&mdash;when I heard an unfamiliar voice
+addressing me with, 'I say&mdash;you!' and the moment afterwards realised
+that it proceeded from my own horse!</p>
+
+<p>I am not ashamed to own that I was as nearly off as possible; for a more
+practised rider than I could pretend to be might have a difficulty in
+preserving his equanimity in this all but unparalleled situation. I was
+too much engaged in feeling for my left stirrup to make any reply, and
+presently the horse spoke once more. 'I say,' he inquired, and I failed
+to discern the slightest trace of respect in his tone&mdash;'do you think you
+can ride?' You can judge for yourself how disconcerting the inquiry must
+have been from such lips: I felt rooted to the saddle&mdash;a sensation
+which, with me, was sufficiently rare. I looked round<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[Pg 11]</a></span> in helpless
+bewilderment, at the shimmering Serpentine, and the white houses in Park
+Lane gleaming out of a lilac haze, at the cocoa-coloured Row, and the
+flash of distant carriage-wheels in the sunlight: all looked as
+usual&mdash;and yet, there was I on the back of a horse which had just
+inquired 'whether I thought I could ride'!</p>
+
+<p>'I have had two dozen lessons at a riding-school,' I said at last, with
+rather a flabby dignity.</p>
+
+<p>'I should hardly have suspected it,' was his brutal retort. 'You are
+evidently one of the hopeless cases.'</p>
+
+<p>I was deeply hurt, the more so because I could not deny that he had some
+claim to be a judge. 'I&mdash;I thought we were getting on so nicely
+together,' I faltered, and all he said in reply to that was, '<i>Did</i>
+you?'</p>
+
+<p>'Do you know,' I began, striving to be conversational, 'I never was on a
+horse that talked before.'</p>
+
+<p>'You are enough to make any horse talk,' he answered; 'but I suppose I
+<i>am</i> an exception.'</p>
+
+<p>'I think you must be,' said I. 'The only horses I ever heard of as
+possessing the gift of speech were the Houyhnhnms.'</p>
+
+<p>'How do you know I am not one of them?' he replied.</p>
+
+<p>'If you are, you will understand that I took the liberty of mounting you
+under a very pardonable mistake; and if you will have the goodness to
+stand still, I will no longer detain you.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[Pg 12]</a></span></p><p>'Not so fast,' said he: 'I want to know something more about you first.
+I should say now you were a man with plenty of oats.'</p>
+
+<p>'I am&mdash;well off,' I said. How I wished I was!</p>
+
+<p>'I have long been looking out for a proprietor who would not overwork
+me: now, of course, I don't know, but you scarcely strike me as a <i>hard</i>
+rider.'</p>
+
+<p>'I do not think I could be fairly accused of that,' I answered, with all
+the consciousness of innocence.</p>
+
+<p>'Just so&mdash;then buy me.'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' I gasped: 'after the extremely candid opinion you were good enough
+to express of my riding, I'm surprised that you should even suggest such
+a thing.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I will put up with that&mdash;you will suit me well enough, I dare say.'</p>
+
+<p>'You must excuse me. I prefer to keep my spare cash for worthier
+objects; and, with your permission, I will spend the remainder of the
+afternoon on foot.'</p>
+
+<p>'You will do nothing of the sort,' said he.</p>
+
+<p>'If you won't stop, and let me get off properly,' I said with firmness,
+'I shall <i>roll</i> off.' There were some promenaders within easy hail; but
+how was I to word a call for help, how explain such a dilemma as mine?</p>
+
+<p>'You will only reduce me to the painful necessity of rolling on you,' he
+replied. 'You must see that you are to a certain extent in my power.
+Suppose it occurred to me to leap those rails and take you into<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[Pg 13]</a></span> the
+Serpentine, or to run away and upset a mounted policeman with you&mdash;do
+you think you could offer much opposition?'</p>
+
+<p>I could not honestly assert that I did. 'You were introduced to me,' I
+said reproachfully, 'as a <i>kind</i> horse!'</p>
+
+<p>'And so I am&mdash;apart from matters of business. Come, will you buy, or be
+bolted with? I hate indecision!'</p>
+
+<p>'Buy!' I said, with commercial promptness. 'If you will take me back, I
+will arrange about it at once.'</p>
+
+<p>It is needless to say that my one idea was to get safely off his back:
+after which, neither honour nor law could require me to execute a
+contract extorted from me by threats. But, as we were going down the
+mews, he said reflectively, 'I've been thinking&mdash;it will be better for
+all parties, if you make your offer to my proprietor <i>before</i> you
+dismount.' I was too vexed to speak: this animal's infernal intelligence
+had foreseen my man&oelig;uvre&mdash;he meant to foil it, if he could.</p>
+
+<p>And then we clattered in under the glass-roofed yard of the livery
+stables; and the job-master, who was alone there, cast his eyes up at
+the sickly-faced clock, as if he were comparing its pallor with my own.
+'Why, you <i>are</i> home early, sir,' he said. 'You didn't find the 'orse
+too much for you, did you?' He said this without any suspicion of the
+real truth; and, indeed, I may say, once for all, that this weird
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[Pg 14]</a></span>horse&mdash;Houyhnhnm, or whatever else he might be&mdash;admitted no one but
+myself into the secret of his marvellous gifts, and in all his
+conversations with me, managed (though how, I cannot pretend to say) to
+avoid being overheard.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, dear no,' I protested, 'he carried me admirably&mdash;admirably!' and I
+made an attempt to slip off.</p>
+
+<p>No such thing: Brutus instantly jogged my memory, and me, by the
+slightest suggestion of a 'buck.'</p>
+
+<p>'He's a grand 'orse, sir, isn't he?' said the job-master complacently.</p>
+
+<p>'M&mdash;magnificent!' I agreed, with a jerk. 'Will you go to his head,
+please?'</p>
+
+<p>But the horse backed into the centre of the yard, where he plunged with
+a quiet obstinacy. 'I like him so much,' I called out, as I clung to the
+saddle, 'that I want to know if you're at all inclined to part with
+him?' Here Brutus became calm and attentive.</p>
+
+<p>'Would you be inclined to make me a orfer for him, sir?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' I said faintly. 'About how much would he be?'</p>
+
+<p>'You step into my orfice here, sir,' said he, 'and we'll talk it over.'</p>
+
+<p>I should have been only too willing, for there was no room there for the
+horse, but the suspicious animal would not hear of it: he began to
+revolve immediately.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[Pg 15]</a></span></p><p>'Let us settle it now&mdash;here,' I said, 'I can't wait.'</p>
+
+<p>The job-master stroked away a grin. No doubt there <i>was</i> something
+unbusinesslike and unpractical in such precipitation, especially as
+combined with my appearance at the time.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you <i>'ave</i> took a voilent fancy to the 'orse and no mistake,
+sir,' he remarked.</p>
+
+<p>'I never crossed a handsomer creature,' I said; which was hardly a
+prudent remark for an intending purchaser, but then, there was the
+animal himself to be conciliated.</p>
+
+<p>'I don't know, really, as I can do without him just at this time of
+year,' said the man. 'I'm under-'orsed as it is for the work I've got to
+do.'</p>
+
+<p>A sweet relief stole over me: I had done all that could be expected of
+me. 'I'm very sorry to hear that,' I said, preparing to dismount. 'That
+<i>is</i> a disappointment; but if you can't there's an end of it.'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't you be afraid,' said Brutus, '<i>he'll</i> sell me readily enough:
+make him an offer, quick!'</p>
+
+<p>'I'll give you thirty guineas for him, come!' I said, knowing well
+enough that he would not take twice the money.</p>
+
+<p>'I thought a gentleman like you would have had more insight into the
+value of a 'orse,' he said: 'why, his action alone is worth that, sir.'</p>
+
+<p>'You couldn't let me have the action without the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[Pg 16]</a></span> horse, I suppose?' I
+said, and I must have intended some joke.</p>
+
+<p>It is unnecessary to prolong a painful scene. Brutus ran me up steadily
+from sum to sum, until his owner said at last: 'Well, we won't 'aggle,
+sir, call it a hundred.'</p>
+
+<p>I had to call it a hundred, and what is more, it <i>was</i> a hundred. I took
+him without a warranty, without even a veterinary opinion. I could have
+been induced to take my purchase away then and there, as if I had been
+buying a canary, so unaccustomed was I to transactions of this kind, and
+I am afraid the job-master considered me little better than a fool.</p>
+
+<p>So I found myself the involuntary possessor of a Houyhnhnm, or something
+even worse, and I walked back to my rooms in Park Street in a state of
+stupor. What was I to do with him? To ride an animal so brutally
+plainspoken would be a continual penance; and yet, I should have to keep
+him, for I knew he was cunning enough to outwit any attempt to dispose
+of him. And to this, Love and Ambition had led me! I could not, after
+all I had said, approach Diana with any confidence as a mere pedestrian:
+the fact that I was in possession of a healthy horse which I never rode,
+would be sure to leak out in time, and how was I to account for it? I
+could see no way, and I groaned under an embarrassment which I dared not
+confide to the friendliest ear. I hated the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[Pg 17]</a></span> monster that had saddled
+himself upon me, and looked in vain for any mode of escape.</p>
+
+<p>I had to provide Brutus with stabling in another part of the town, for
+he proved exceedingly difficult to please: he found fault with
+everything, and I only wonder he did not demand that his stable should
+be fitted up with blue china and mezzotints. In his new quarters I left
+him for some days to his own devices: a course which I was glad to find,
+on visiting him again, had considerably reduced his arrogance. He wanted
+to go in the Row and see the other horses, and it did not at all meet
+his views to be exercised there by a stableman at unfashionable hours.
+So he proposed a compromise. If I would only consent to mount him, he
+engaged to treat me with forbearance, and pointed out that he could give
+me, as he expressed it, various 'tips' which would improve my seat. I
+was not blind to the advantages of such an arrangement. It is not every
+one who secures a riding-master in the person of his own horse; the
+horse is essentially a generous animal, and I felt that I might trust to
+Brutus's honour. And to do him justice, he observed the compact with
+strict good faith. Some of his 'tips,' it is true, very nearly tipped me
+off, but their result was to bring us closer together; our relations
+were less strained; it seemed to me that I gained more mastery over him
+every day, and was less stiff afterwards.</p>
+
+<p>But I was not allowed to enjoy this illusion long.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[Pg 18]</a></span> One day when I
+innocently asked him if he found my hands improving, he turned upon me
+his off sardonic eye. 'You'll <i>never</i> improve, old sack-of-beans' (for
+he had come to address me with a freedom I burned to resent); 'hands!
+why, you're sawing my mouth off all the time. And your feet "home," and
+tickling me under my shoulders at every stride&mdash;why, I'm half ashamed to
+be seen about with you.'</p>
+
+<p>I was deeply hurt. 'I will spare you for the future,' I said coldly;
+'this is my last appearance.'</p>
+
+<p>'Nonsense,' he said, 'you needn't show temper over it. Surely, if I can
+put up with it, <i>you</i> can! But we will make a new compact.' (I never
+knew such a beast as he was for bargains!) 'You only worry me by
+interfering with the reins. Let 'em out, and leave everything to me.
+Just mention from time to time where you want to go, and I'll attend to
+it,&mdash;if I've nothing better to do.'</p>
+
+<p>I felt that such an understanding was destructive of all dignity,
+subverting, as it did, the natural relations between horse and rider;
+but I had hardly any self-respect left, and I consented, since I saw no
+way of refusing. And on the whole, I cannot say, even now, that I had
+any grave reason for finding fault with the use Brutus made of my
+concessions; he showed more tact than I could have expected in
+disguising the merely nominal nature of my authority.</p>
+
+<p>I had only one serious complaint against him,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[Pg 19]</a></span> which was that he had a
+habit of breaking suddenly away, with a merely formal apology, to
+exchange equine civilities with some cob or mare, to whose owner I was a
+perfect stranger, thus driving me to invent the most desperate excuses
+to cover my seeming intrusion: but I managed to account for it in
+various ways, and even made a few acquaintances in this irregular and
+involuntary manner. I could have wished he had been a less susceptible
+animal, for, though his flirtations were merely Platonic, it is rather
+humiliating to have to play 'gooseberry' to one's own horse&mdash;a part
+which I was constantly being called upon to perform!</p>
+
+<p>As it happened, Diana was away in Paris that Easter, and we had not met
+since my appearance in the Row; but I knew she would be in town again
+shortly, and with consummate diplomacy I began to excite Brutus's
+curiosity by sundry careless, half-slighting allusions to Miss
+Chetwynd's little mare, Wild Rose. 'She's too frisky for my taste,' I
+said, 'but she's been a good deal admired, though I dare say you
+wouldn't be particularly struck by her.'</p>
+
+<p>So that, on the first afternoon of Diana's return to the Row, I found it
+easy, under cover of giving Brutus an opportunity of forming an opinion,
+to prevail on him to carry me to her side. Diana, who was with a certain
+Lady Verney, her chaperon, welcomed me with a charming smile.</p>
+
+<p>'I had no idea you could ride so well,' she said,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[Pg 20]</a></span> 'you manage that
+beautiful horse of yours so very easily&mdash;with such light hands, too.'</p>
+
+<p>This was not irony, for I could now give my whole mind to my seat; and,
+as I never interfered at all with the steering apparatus, my hands must
+have seemed the perfection of lightness.</p>
+
+<p>'He wants delicate handling,' I answered carelessly, 'but he goes very
+well with <i>me</i>.'</p>
+
+<p>'I wish you would let me try his paces some morning, Pulvertoft,' struck
+in a Colonel Cockshott, who was riding with them, and whom I knew
+slightly: 'I've a notion he would go better on the curb.'</p>
+
+<p>'I shall be very happy,' I began, when, just in time, I noticed a
+warning depression in Brutus's ears. The Colonel rode about sixteen
+stone, and with spurs! 'I mean,' I added hastily, 'I should have
+been&mdash;only, to tell you the truth, I couldn't conscientiously trust any
+one on him but myself.'</p>
+
+<p>'My dear fellow!' said the Colonel, who I could see was offended, 'I've
+not met many horses in my time that I couldn't get upon terms with.'</p>
+
+<p>'I think Mr. Pulvertoft is <i>quite</i> right,' said Diana. 'When a horse
+gets accustomed to one he does so resent a strange hand: it spoils his
+temper for days. I never will lend Wild Rose to anybody for that very
+reason!'</p>
+
+<p>The Colonel fell back in the rear in a decided sulk. 'Poor dear Colonel
+Cockshott!' said Diana, 'he is so<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[Pg 21]</a></span> proud of his riding, but <i>I</i> think he
+dragoons a horse. I don't call that <i>riding</i>, do you?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well&mdash;hardly,' I agreed, with easy disparagement. 'I never believe in
+ruling a horse by fear.'</p>
+
+<p>'I suppose you are very fond of yours?' she said.</p>
+
+<p>'Fond is not the word!' I exclaimed&mdash;and it certainly was not.</p>
+
+<p>'I am not sure that what I said about lending Wild Rose would apply to
+<i>you</i>,' she said. 'I think you would be gentle with her.'</p>
+
+<p>I was certain that I should treat her with all consideration; but as I
+doubted whether she would wholly reciprocate it, I said with much
+presence of mind, that I should regard riding her as akin to
+profanation.</p>
+
+<p>As Brutus and I were going home, he observed that it was a good thing I
+had not agreed to lend him to the Colonel.</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' I said, determined to improve the occasion, 'you might not have
+found him as considerate as&mdash;well, as some people!'</p>
+
+<p>'I meant it was a good thing for <i>you</i>!' he hinted darkly, and I did not
+care to ask for an explanation. 'What did you mean,' he resumed, 'by
+saying that I should not admire Wild Rose? Why, she is
+charming&mdash;charming!'</p>
+
+<p>'In that case,' I said, 'I don't mind riding with her mistress
+occasionally&mdash;to oblige you.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[Pg 22]</a></span></p><p>'You don't mind!' he said; 'you will <i>have</i> to, my boy,&mdash;and every
+afternoon!'</p>
+
+<p>I suppressed a chuckle: after all, man <i>is</i> the nobler animal. I could
+manage a horse&mdash;in my own way. My little <i>ruse</i> had succeeded: I should
+have no more forced introductions to mystified strangers.</p>
+
+<p>And now for some weeks my life passed in a happy dream. I only lived for
+those hours in the Row, where Brutus turned as naturally to Wild Rose as
+the sunflower to the sun, and Diana and I grew more intimate every day.
+Happiness and security made me almost witty. I was merciless in my
+raillery of the eccentric exhibitions of horsemanship which were to be
+met with, and Diana was provoked by my comments to the sweetest silvery
+laughter. As for Colonel Cockshott, whom I had once suspected of a
+desire to be my rival, he had long become a 'negligible quantity;' and
+if I delayed in asking Diana to trust me with her sweet self, it was
+only because I found an epicurean pleasure in prolonging a suspense that
+was so little uncertain.</p>
+
+<p>And then, without warning, my riding was interrupted for a while. Brutus
+was discovered, much to his annoyance, to have a saddle-raw, and was
+even so unjust as to lay the blame on me, though, for my own part, I
+thought it a mark of apt, though tardy, retribution. I was not disposed
+to tempt Fortune upon any other mount, but I could not keep away<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[Pg 23]</a></span> from
+the Row, nevertheless, and appeared there on foot. I saw Diana riding
+with the Colonel, who seemed to think his opportunity had come at last;
+but whenever she passed the railings on which I leaned, she would raise
+her eyebrows and draw her mouth down into a little curve of resigned
+boredom, which completely reassured me. Still, I was very glad when
+Brutus was well again, and we were cantering down the Row once more,
+both in the highest spirits.</p>
+
+<p>'I never heard the horses here <i>whinny</i> so much as they do this season,'
+I said, by way of making conversation. 'Can you account for it at all?'
+For he sometimes gave me pieces of information which enabled me to
+impress Diana afterwards by my intimate knowledge of horses.</p>
+
+<p>'Whinnying?' he said. 'They're <i>laughing</i>, that's what they're
+doing&mdash;and no wonder!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh!' said I, 'and what's the joke?'</p>
+
+<p>'Why, <i>you</i> are!' he replied. 'You don't suppose you take <i>them</i> in, do
+you? They know all about you, bless your heart!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, do they?' I said blankly. This brute took a positive pleasure, I
+believe, in reducing my self-esteem.</p>
+
+<p>'I dare say it has got about through Wild Rose,' he continued. 'She was
+immensely tickled when I told her. I'm afraid she must have been feeling
+rather dull all these days, by the bye.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[Pg 24]</a></span></p><p>I felt an unworthy impulse to take his conceit down as he had lowered
+mine.</p>
+
+<p>'Not so very, I think,' I said. 'She seemed to me to find that brown
+hunter of Colonel Cockshott's a very agreeable substitute.'</p>
+
+<p>Late as it is for reparation, I must acknowledge with shame that in
+uttering this insinuation, I did that poor little mare (for whom I
+entertained the highest respect) a shameful injustice; and I should like
+to state here, in the most solemn and emphatic manner, my sincere belief
+that, from first to last, she conducted herself in a manner that should
+have shielded her from all calumny.</p>
+
+<p>It was only a mean desire to retaliate, a petty and ignoble spite, that
+prompted me thus to poison Brutus's confidence, and I regretted the
+words as soon as I had uttered them.</p>
+
+<p>'That beast!' he said, starting as if I had touched him with a whip&mdash;a
+thing I never used&mdash;'why, he hasn't two ideas in his great fiddle-head.
+The only sort of officer <i>he</i> ought to carry is a Salvationist!'</p>
+
+<p>'I grant he has not your personal advantages and charm of manner,' I
+said. 'No doubt I was wrong to say anything about it.'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' he said, 'you&mdash;you have done me a service,' and he relapsed into a
+sombre silence.</p>
+
+<p>I was riding with Diana as usual, and was about to express my delight at
+being able to resume our companionship, when her mare drew slightly
+ahead<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[Pg 25]</a></span> and lashed out suddenly, catching me on the left leg, and causing
+intense agony for the moment.</p>
+
+<p>Diana showed the sweetest concern, imploring me to go home in a cab at
+once, while her groom took charge of Brutus. I declined the cab; but, as
+my leg was really painful, and Brutus was showing an impatience I dared
+not disregard, I had to leave her side.</p>
+
+<p>On our way home, Brutus said moodily, 'It is all over between us&mdash;you
+saw that?'</p>
+
+<p>'I felt it!' I replied. 'She nearly broke my leg.'</p>
+
+<p>'It was intended for me,' he said. 'It was her way of signifying that we
+had better be strangers for the future. I taxed her with her
+faithlessness; she denied it, of course&mdash;every mare does; we had an
+explanation, and everything is at an end!'</p>
+
+<p>I did not ride him again for some days, and when I did, I found him
+steeped in Byronic gloom. He even wanted at first to keep entirely on
+the Bayswater side of the Park, though I succeeded in arguing him out of
+such weakness. 'Be a horse!' I said. 'Show her you don't care. You only
+flatter her by betraying your feelings.'</p>
+
+<p>This was a subtlety that had evidently not occurred to him, but he was
+intelligent enough to feel the force of what I said. 'You are right,' he
+admitted; 'you are not quite a fool in some respects. She shall see how
+little I care!'</p>
+
+<p>Naturally, after this, I expected to accompany<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[Pg 26]</a></span> Diana as usual, and it
+was a bitter disappointment to me to find that Brutus would not hear of
+doing so. He had an old acquaintance in the Park, a dapple-grey, who,
+probably from some early disappointment was a confirmed cynic, and whose
+society he thought would be congenial just then. The grey was ridden
+regularly by a certain Miss Gittens, whose appearance as she titupped
+laboriously up and down had often furnished Diana and myself with
+amusement.</p>
+
+<p>And now, in spite of all my efforts, Brutus made straight to the grey. I
+was not in such difficulties as might have been expected, for I happened
+to know Miss Gittens slightly, as a lady no longer in the bloom of
+youth, who still retained a wiry form of girlishness. Though rather
+disliking her than not, I found it necessary just then to throw some
+slight effusion into my greeting. She, not unnaturally perhaps, was
+flattered by my preference, and begged me to give her a little
+instruction in riding, which&mdash;Heaven forgive me for it!&mdash;I took upon
+myself to do.</p>
+
+<p>Even now I scarcely see how I could have acted otherwise: I could not
+leave her side until Brutus had exhausted the pleasures of cynicism with
+his grey friend, and the time had to be filled up somehow. But, oh, the
+torture of seeing Diana at a distance, and knowing that only a miserable
+misunderstanding between our respective steeds kept us apart, feeling
+constrained even to avoid looking in her direction, lest she should
+summon me to her side!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[Pg 27]</a></span></p><p>One day, as I was riding with Miss Gittens, she glanced coyly at me
+over her sharp right shoulder, and said, 'Do you know, only such a
+little while ago, I never even dreamed that we should ever become as
+intimate as we are now; it seems almost incredible, does it not?'</p>
+
+<p>'You must not say so,' I replied. 'Surely there is nothing singular in
+my helping you a little with your riding?' Though it struck me that it
+would have been very singular if I had.</p>
+
+<p>'Perhaps not singular,' she murmured, looking modestly down her nose;
+'but will you think me very unmaidenly if I confess that, to me, those
+lessons have developed a dawning danger?'</p>
+
+<p>'You are perfectly safe on the grey,' I said.</p>
+
+<p>'I&mdash;I was not thinking of the grey,' she returned. 'Dear Mr. Pulvertoft,
+I must speak frankly&mdash;a girl has so many things to consider, and I am
+afraid you have made me forget how wrongly and thoughtlessly I have been
+behaving of late. I cannot help suspecting that you must have some
+motive in seeking my society in so&mdash;so marked a manner.'</p>
+
+<p>'Miss Gittens,' said I, 'I can disguise nothing: I have.'</p>
+
+<p>'And you have not been merely amusing yourself all this time?'</p>
+
+<p>'Before Heaven,' I cried with fervour, 'I have <i>not</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>'You are not one of those false men who give their<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[Pg 28]</a></span> bridle-reins a
+shake, and ride off with "Adieu for evermore!"&mdash;tell me you are not?'</p>
+
+<p>I might shake <i>my</i> bridle-reins till I was tired and nothing would come
+of it unless Brutus was in the humour to depart; so that I was able to
+assure her with truth that I was not at all that kind of person.</p>
+
+<p>'Then why not let your heart speak?'</p>
+
+<p>'There is such a thing,' I said gloomily, 'as a heart that is gagged.'</p>
+
+<p>'Can no word, no hint of mine loosen the gag?' she wished to know.
+'What, you are silent still? Then, Mr. Pulvertoft, though I may seem
+harsh and cruel in saying it, our pleasant intercourse must end&mdash;we must
+ride together no more!'</p>
+
+<p>No more? What would Brutus say to that? I was horrified. 'Miss Gittens,'
+I said in great agitation, 'I entreat you to unsay those words. I&mdash;I am
+afraid I could not undertake to accept such a dismissal. Surely, after
+that, you will not insist!'</p>
+
+<p>She sighed. 'I am a weak, foolish girl,' she said; 'you are only too
+able to overcome my judgment. There, Mr. Pulvertoft, look happy again&mdash;I
+relent. You may stay if you will!'</p>
+
+<p>You must believe that I felt thoroughly ashamed of myself, for I could
+not be blind to the encouragement which, though I sought to confine my
+words to strict truth, I was innocently affording. But, with a horse
+like mine, what was a man to do? What would you have done yourself? As
+soon as was prudent, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[Pg 29]</a></span> hinted to Brutus that his confidences had lasted
+long enough; and as he trotted away with me, he remarked, 'I thought you
+were never going.' Was he weary of the grey already? My heart leaped.
+'Brutus,' I said thickly, 'are you strong enough to bear a great joy?'</p>
+
+<p>'Speak out,' he said, 'and do try to keep those heels out of my ribs.'</p>
+
+<p>'I cannot see you suffer,' I told him, with a sense of my own hypocrisy
+all the time. 'I must tell you&mdash;circumstances have come to my knowledge
+which lead me to believe that we have both judged Wild Rose too hastily.
+I am sure that her heart is yours still. She is only longing to tell you
+that she has never really swerved from her allegiance.'</p>
+
+<p>'It is too late now,' he said, and the back of his head looked
+inflexibly obstinate; 'we have kept asunder too long.'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' I said, 'listen. I take more interest in you than you are,
+perhaps, aware of, and I have thought of a little plan for bringing you
+together again. What if I find an opportunity to see the lady she
+belongs to&mdash;we have not met lately, as you know, and I do not pretend
+that I desire a renewal of our intimacy&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'You like the one on the grey best; I saw that long ago,' he said; and I
+left him in his error.</p>
+
+<p>'In any case, for your sake, I will sacrifice myself,' I said
+magnanimously. 'I will begin to-morrow.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[Pg 30]</a></span> Come, you will not let your
+lives be wrecked by a foolish lovers' quarrel?'</p>
+
+<p>He made a little half-hearted opposition, but finally, as I knew he
+would, consented. I had gained my point: I was free from Miss Gittens at
+last!</p>
+
+<p>That evening I met Diana in the hall of a house in Eaton Square. She was
+going downstairs as I was making my way to the ball-room, and greeted me
+with a rather cool little nod.</p>
+
+<p>'You have quite deserted me lately,' she said, smiling, but I could read
+the reproach in her eyes, 'you never ride with us now.'</p>
+
+<p>My throat was swelling with passionate eloquence&mdash;and I could not get
+any of it out.</p>
+
+<p>'No, I never do,' was all my stupid tongue could find to say.</p>
+
+<p>'You have discovered a more congenial companion,' said cruel Diana.</p>
+
+<p>'Miss Chetwynd,' I said eagerly, 'you don't know how I have been
+wishing&mdash;! Will you let me ride with you to-morrow, as&mdash;as you used to
+do?'</p>
+
+<p>'You are quite sure you won't be afraid of my naughty Wild Rose?' she
+said. 'I have given her such a scolding, that I think she is thoroughly
+ashamed of herself.'</p>
+
+<p>'You thought it was <i>that</i> that kept me!' I cried. 'Oh, if I could tell
+you!'</p>
+
+<p>She smiled: she was my dear, friendly Diana again.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[Pg 31]</a></span></p><p>'You shall tell me all about it to-morrow,' she said. 'You will not
+have another opportunity, because we are going to Aix on Friday. And
+now, good-night. I am stopping the way, and the linkman is getting quite
+excited over it.'</p>
+
+<p>She passed on, and the carriage rolled away with her, and I was too
+happy to mind very much&mdash;had she not forgiven me? Should we not meet
+to-morrow? I should have two whole hours to declare myself in, and this
+time I would dally with Fortune no longer.</p>
+
+<p>How excited I was the following day: how fearful, when the morning broke
+grey and lowering: how grateful, when the benignant sun shone out later,
+and promised a brilliant afternoon: how carefully I dressed, and what a
+price I paid for the flower for my buttonhole!</p>
+
+<p>So we cantered on to the Row, as goodly a couple (if I may be pardoned
+this retrospective vanity) as any there; and by and by, I saw, with the
+quick eye of a lover, Diana's willowy form in the distance. She was not
+alone, but I knew that the Colonel would soon have to yield his place to
+me.</p>
+
+<p>As soon as she saw me, she urged her mare to a trot, and came towards me
+with the loveliest faint blush and dawning smile of welcome, when, all
+at once, Brutus came to a dead stop, which nearly threw me on his neck,
+and stood quivering in every limb.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[Pg 32]</a></span></p><p>'Do you see that?' he said hoarsely. 'And I was about to forgive her!'</p>
+
+<p>I saw: my insinuation, baseless enough at the beginning, was now but too
+well justified. Colonel Cockshott was on his raw-boned brown hunter, and
+even my brief acquaintance with horses enabled me to see that Wild Rose
+no longer regarded him with her former indifference.</p>
+
+<p>Diana and the Colonel had reined up and seemed waiting for me&mdash;would
+Brutus never move? 'Show your pride,' I said in an agonised whisper,
+'Treat her with the contempt she deserves!'</p>
+
+<p>'I will,' he said between his bit and clenched teeth.</p>
+
+<p>And then Miss Gittens came bumping by on the grey, and, before I could
+interfere, my Houyhnhnm was off like a shot in pursuit. I saw Diana's
+sweet, surprised face: I heard the Colonel's jarring laugh as I passed,
+and I&mdash;I could only bow in mortified appeal, and long for a gulf to leap
+into like Curtius!</p>
+
+<p>I don't know what I said to Miss Gittens. I believe I made myself
+recklessly amiable, and I remember she lingered over parting in a
+horribly emotional manner. I was too miserable to mind: all the time I
+was seeing Diana's astonished eyes, hearing Colonel Cockshott's
+heartless laugh. Brutus made a kind of explanation on our way home: 'You
+meant well,' he said, 'but you see you were wrong. Your proposed
+sacrifice, for which I am just as grateful to you as if<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[Pg 33]</a></span> it had been
+effected, was useless. All I could do in return was to take you where
+your true inclination lay. I, too, can be unselfish.'</p>
+
+<p>I was too dejected to curse his unselfishness. I did not even trouble
+myself to explain what it had probably cost me. I only felt drearily
+that I had had my last ride, I had had enough of horsemanship for ever!</p>
+
+<p>That evening I went to the theatre, I wanted to deaden thought for the
+moment; and during one of the intervals I saw Lady Verney in the stalls,
+and went up to speak to her. 'Your niece is not with you?' I said; 'I
+thought I should have had a chance of&mdash;of saying good-bye to her before
+she left for the continent.'</p>
+
+<p>I had a lingering hope that she might ask me to lunch, that I might have
+one more opportunity of explaining.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh,' said Lady Verney, 'but that is all changed; we are not going&mdash;at
+least, not yet.'</p>
+
+<p>'Not going!' I cried, incredulous for very joy.</p>
+
+<p>'No, it is all very sudden; but,&mdash;well, you are almost like an old
+friend, and you are sure to hear it sooner or later. I only knew myself
+this afternoon, when she came in from her ride. Colonel Cockshott has
+proposed and she has accepted him. We're <i>so</i> pleased about it. Wasn't
+dear Mrs. &mdash;&mdash; delightful in that last act? I positively saw real tears
+on her face!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[Pg 34]</a></span></p><p>If I had waited much longer she would have seen a similar display of
+realism on mine. But I went back and sat the interval out, and listened
+critically to the classical selection of chamber-music from the
+orchestra, and saw the rest of the play, though I have no notion how it
+ended.</p>
+
+<p>All that night my heart was slowly consumed by a dull rage that grew
+with every sleepless hour; but the object of my resentment was not
+Diana. She had only done what as a woman she was amply justified in
+doing after the pointed slight I had apparently inflicted upon her. Her
+punishment was sufficient already, for, of course, I guessed that she
+had only accepted the Colonel under the first intolerable sting of
+desertion. No: I reserved all my wrath for Brutus, who had betrayed me
+at the moment of triumph. I planned revenge. Cost what it might I would
+ride him once more. In the eyes of the law I was his master. I would
+exercise my legal rights to the full.</p>
+
+<p>The afternoon came at last. I was in a white heat of anger, though as I
+ascended to the saddle there were bystanders who put a more uncharitable
+construction upon my complexion.</p>
+
+<p>Brutus cast an uneasy eye at my heels as we started: 'What are those
+things you've got on?' he inquired.</p>
+
+<p>'Spurs,' I replied curtly.</p>
+
+<p>'You shouldn't wear them till you have learnt to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[Pg 35]</a></span> turn your toes in,' he
+said. 'And a whip, too! May I ask what that is for?'</p>
+
+<p>'We will discuss that presently,' I said very coldly; for I did not want
+to have a scene with my horse in the street.</p>
+
+<p>When we came round by the statue of Achilles and on to the Ride, I
+shortened my reins, and got a better hold of the whip, while I found
+that, from some cause I cannot explain, the roof of my mouth grew
+uncomfortably dry.</p>
+
+<p>'I should be glad of a little quiet talk with you, if you've no
+objection,' I began.</p>
+
+<p>'I am quite at your disposal,' he said, champing his bit with a touch of
+irony.</p>
+
+<p>'First, let me tell you,' I said, 'that I have lost my only love for
+ever.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' he retorted flippantly, 'you won't die of it. So have I. We must
+endeavour to console one another!'</p>
+
+<p>I still maintained a deadly calm. 'You seem unaware that you are the
+sole cause of my calamity,' I said. 'Had you only consented to face Wild
+Rose yesterday, I should have been a happy man by this time!'</p>
+
+<p>'How was I to know that, when you let me think all your affections were
+given to the elderly thing who is trotted out by my friend the grey?'</p>
+
+<p>'We won't argue, please,' I said hastily. 'It is enough that your
+infernal egotism and self-will have<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[Pg 36]</a></span> ruined my happiness. I have allowed
+you to usurp the rule, to reverse our natural positions. I shall do so
+no more. I intend to teach you a lesson you will never forget.'</p>
+
+<p>For a horse, he certainly had a keen sense of humour. I thought the
+girths would have snapped.</p>
+
+<p>'And when do you intend to begin?' he asked, as soon as he could speak.</p>
+
+<p>I looked in front of me: there were Diana and her accepted lover riding
+towards us; and so natural is dissimulation, even to the sweetest and
+best women, that no one would have suspected from her radiant face that
+her gaiety covered an aching heart.</p>
+
+<p>'I intend to begin <i>now</i>,' I said. 'Monster, demon, whatever you are
+that have held me in thrall so long, I have broken my chains! I have
+been a coward long enough. You may kill me if you like. I rather hope
+you will; but first I mean to pay you back some of the humiliation with
+which you have loaded me. I intend to thrash you as long as I remain in
+the saddle.'</p>
+
+<p>I have been told by eye-witnesses that the chastisement was of brief
+duration, but while it lasted, I flatter myself, it was severe. I laid
+into him with a stout whip, of whose effectiveness I had assured myself
+by experiments upon my own legs. I dug my borrowed spurs into his
+flanks. I jerked his mouth. I dare say he was almost as much surprised
+as pained. But he <i>was</i> pained!</p>
+
+<p>I was about to continue my practical rebuke, when<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[Pg 37]</a></span> my victim suddenly
+evaded my grasp; and for one vivid second I seemed to be gazing upon a
+birdseye view of his back; and then there was a crash, and I lay,
+buzzing like a bee, in an iridescent fog, and each colour meant a
+different pain, and they faded at last into darkness, and I remember no
+more.</p>
+
+<p>'It was weeks,' concluded Mr. Pulvertoft, 'before that darkness lifted
+and revealed me to myself as a strapped and bandaged invalid. But&mdash;and
+this is perhaps the most curious part of my narrative&mdash;almost the first
+sounds that reached my ears were those of wedding bells; and I knew,
+without requiring to be told, that they were ringing for Diana's
+marriage with the Colonel. <i>That</i> showed there wasn't much the matter
+with me, didn't it? Why, I can hear them everywhere now. I don't think
+she ought to have had them rung at Sandown though: it was just a little
+ostentatious, so long after the ceremony; don't you think so?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes&mdash;yes,' I said; 'but you never told me what became of the horse.'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah! the horse&mdash;yes. I am looking for him. I'm not so angry with him as
+I was, and I don't like to ask too many questions at the stables, for
+fear they may tell me one day that they had to shoot him while I was so
+ill. You knew I was ill, I dare say?' he broke off: 'there were
+bulletins about me in the papers. Look here.'</p>
+
+<p>He handed me a cutting on which I read:</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[Pg 38]</a></span></p><p>'<span class="smcap">The Recent Accident in Rotten Row.</span>&mdash;There is no change as yet in Mr.
+Pulvertoft's condition. The unfortunate gentleman is still lying
+unconscious at his rooms in Park Street; and his medical attendants fear
+that, even if he recovers his physical strength, the brain will be
+permanently injured.'</p>
+
+<p>'But that was all nonsense!' said Mr. Pulvertoft, with a little nervous
+laugh, 'it wasn't injured a bit, or how could I remember everything so
+clearly as I do, you know?'</p>
+
+<p>And this was an argument that was, of course, unanswerable.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[Pg 39]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="THE_GOOD_LITTLE_GIRL" id="THE_GOOD_LITTLE_GIRL"></a><i>THE GOOD LITTLE GIRL</i></h2>
+
+<h3>A STORY FOR CHILDREN</h3>
+
+<p>Her name was Priscilla Prodgers, and she was a very good little girl
+indeed. So good was she, in fact, that she could not help being aware of
+it herself, and that is a stage to which very many quite excellent
+persons never succeed in attaining. She was only just a child, it is
+true, but she had read a great many beautiful story-books, and so she
+knew what a powerful reforming influence a childish and innocent remark,
+or a youthful example, or a happy combination of both, can exert over
+grown-up people. And early in life&mdash;she was but eleven at the date of
+this history&mdash;early in life she had seen clearly that her mission was to
+reform her family and relatives generally. This was a heavy task for one
+so young, particularly in Priscilla's case, for, besides a father,
+mother, brother, and sister, in whom she could not but discern many and
+serious failings, she possessed an aunt who was addicted to insincerity,
+two female cousins whose selfishness and unamiability were painful to
+witness, and a male cousin who talked slang and was so<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[Pg 40]</a></span> worldly that he
+habitually went about in yellow boots! Nevertheless Priscilla did not
+flinch, although, for some reason, her earnest and unremitting efforts
+had hitherto failed to produce any deep impression. At times she thought
+this was owing to the fact that she tried to reform all her family
+together, and that her best plan would be to take each one separately,
+and devote her whole energies to improving that person alone. But then
+she never could make up her mind which member of the family to begin
+with. It is small wonder that she often felt a little disheartened, but
+even that was a cheering symptom, for in the books it is generally just
+when the little heroine becomes most discouraged that the seemingly
+impenitent relative exhibits the first sign of softening.</p>
+
+<p>So Priscilla persevered: sometimes with merely a shocked glance of
+disapproval, which she had practised before the looking-glass until she
+could do it perfectly; sometimes with some tender, tactful little hint.
+'Don't you think, dear papa,' she would say softly, on a Sunday morning,
+'don't you <i>think</i> you could write your newspaper article on some
+<i>other</i> day&mdash;is it a work of <i>real</i> necessity?' Or she would ask her
+mother, who was certainly fond of wearing pretty things. 'How much bread
+for poor starving people would the price of your new bonnet buy, mother?
+I should so like to work it out on my little slate!'</p>
+
+<p>Then she would remind her brother Alick that it would be so much better
+if, instead of wasting his<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[Pg 41]</a></span> time in playing with silly little tin
+soldiers, he would try to learn as much as he could before he was sent
+to school; while she was never tired of quoting to her sister Betty the
+line, 'Be good, sweet maid, and let who will be clever!' which Betty,
+quite unjustly, interpreted to mean that Priscilla thought but poorly of
+her sister's intellectual capacity. Once when, as a great treat, the
+children were allowed to read 'Ivanhoe' aloud, Priscilla declined to
+participate until she had conscientiously read up the whole Norman
+period in her English history; and on another occasion she cried
+bitterly on hearing that her mother had arranged for them to learn
+dancing, and even endured bread and water for an entire day rather than
+consent to acquire an accomplishment which she feared, from what she had
+read, would prove a snare. On the second day&mdash;well, there was roast beef
+and Yorkshire pudding for dinner, and Priscilla yielded; but she made
+the resolution&mdash;and kept it too&mdash;that, if she went to the dancing class,
+she would firmly refuse to take the slightest pains to learn a single
+step.</p>
+
+<p>I only mention all these traits to show that Priscilla really was an
+unusually good child, which makes it the more sad and strange that her
+family should have profited so little by her example. She was neither
+loved nor respected as she ought to have been, I am grieved to say. Her
+papa, when he was not angry, made the cruellest fun of her mild
+reproofs; her mother continued to spend money on dresses and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[Pg 42]</a></span> bonnets,
+and even allowed the maid to say that her mistress was 'not at home,'
+when she was merely unwilling to receive visitors. Alick and Betty, too,
+only grew more exasperated when Priscilla urged them to keep their
+tempers, and altogether she could not help feeling how wasted and thrown
+away she was in such a circle.</p>
+
+<p>But she never quite lost heart; her papa was a literary man and wrote
+tales, some of which she feared were not as true as they affected to be,
+while he invariably neglected to insert a moral in any of them;
+frequently she dropped little remarks before him with apparent
+carelessness, in the hope that he might put them in print&mdash;but he never
+did; she never could recognise herself as a character in any of his
+stories, and so at last she gave up reading them at all!</p>
+
+<p>But one morning she came more near to giving up in utter despair than
+ever before. Only the previous day she had been so hopeful! her father
+had really seemed to be beginning to appreciate his little daughter, and
+had presented her with sixpence in the new coinage to put in her
+money-box. This had emboldened her to such a degree that, happening on
+the following morning to hear him ejaculate 'Confound it!' she had,
+pressing one hand to her beating heart and laying the other hand softly
+upon his shoulder (which is the proper attitude on these occasions),
+reminded him that such an expression was scarcely<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[Pg 43]</a></span> less reprehensible
+than actual bad language. Upon which her hard-hearted papa had told her,
+almost sharply, '<i>not to be a little prig!</i>'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla forgave him, of course, and freely, because he was her father
+and it was her duty to bear with him; but she felt the injustice deeply,
+for all that. Then, when she went up into the nursery, Alick and Betty
+made a frantic uproar, merely because she insisted on teaching them the
+moves in chess, when they perversely wanted to play Halma! So, feeling
+baffled and sick at heart, she had put on her hat and run out all alone
+to a quiet lane near her home, where she could soothe her troubled mind
+by thinking over the ingratitude and lack of appreciation with which her
+efforts were met.</p>
+
+<p>She had not gone very far up the lane when she saw, seated on a bench, a
+bent old woman in a poke-bonnet with a crutch-handled stick in her
+hands, and this old woman Priscilla (who was very quick of observation)
+instantly guessed to be a fairy&mdash;in which, as it fell out, she was
+perfectly right.</p>
+
+<p>'Good day, my pretty child!' croaked the old dame.</p>
+
+<p>'Good-day to you, ma'am!' answered Priscilla politely (for she knew that
+it was not only right but prudent to be civil to fairies, particularly
+when they take the form of old women). 'But, if you please, you mustn't
+call me pretty&mdash;because I am not. At least,' she added, for she prided
+herself upon her truthfulness, 'not <i>exactly</i> pretty. And I should hate<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[Pg 44]</a></span>
+to be always thinking about my looks, like poor Milly&mdash;she's our
+housemaid, you know&mdash;and I so often have to tell her that she did not
+make her <i>own</i> face.'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't alarm you, I see,' said the old crone; 'but possibly you're not
+aware that you're talking to a fairy?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, yes, I am&mdash;but I'm not a bit afraid, because, you see, fairies can
+only hurt <i>bad</i> children.'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, and you're a good little child&mdash;that's not difficult to see!'</p>
+
+<p>'They don't see it at home!' said Priscilla, with a sad little sigh, 'or
+they would listen more when I tell them of things they oughtn't to do.'</p>
+
+<p>'And what things do they do that they oughtn't to, my child&mdash;if you
+don't mind telling me?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I don't mind in the <i>least</i>!' Priscilla hastened to assure her; and
+then she told the old woman all her family's faults, and the trial it
+was to bear with them and go on trying to induce them to mend their
+ways. 'And papa is getting worse than ever,' she concluded dolefully;
+'only fancy, this very morning he called me a little prig!'</p>
+
+<p>'Tut, tut!' said the fairy sympathetically, 'deary, deary me! So he
+called you <i>that</i>, did he?&mdash;"a little prig"! And <i>you</i>, too! Ah, the
+world's coming to a pretty pass! I suppose, now, your papa and the rest
+of them have got it into their heads that you are too young and too
+inexperienced to set up as their adviser&mdash;is that it?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[Pg 45]</a></span></p><p>'I'm afraid so,' admitted Priscilla; 'but we mustn't blame them,' she
+added gently, 'we must remember that they don't know any better&mdash;mustn't
+we, ma'am?'</p>
+
+<p>'You sweet child!' said the old lady with enthusiasm; 'I must see if I
+can't do something to help you, though I'm not the fairy I used to
+be&mdash;still, there are tricks I can manage still, if I'm put to it. What
+you want is something that will prove to them that they ought to pay
+more attention to you, eh?&mdash;something there can be no possible mistake
+about?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes!' cried Priscilla eagerly, 'and&mdash;and&mdash;how would it be if you
+changed them into something else, just to <i>show</i> them, and then I could
+ask for them to be transformed back again, you know?'</p>
+
+<p>'What an ingenious little thing you are!' exclaimed the fairy; 'but, let
+us see&mdash;if you came home and found your cruel papa doing duty as the
+family hatstand, or strutting about as a Cochin China fowl&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, <i>yes</i>; and I'd feed him every day, till he was sorry!' interrupted
+the warmhearted little girl impulsively.</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, but you're so hasty, my dear. Who would write all the clever
+articles and tales to earn bread and meat for you all?&mdash;fowls can't use
+a pen. No, we must find a prettier trick than that&mdash;there <i>was</i> one I
+seem to remember, long, long ago, performing for a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[Pg 46]</a></span> good little ill-used
+girl, just like you, my dearie, just like you! Now what was it? some
+gift I gave her whenever she opened her lips&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'Why, <i>I</i> remember&mdash;how funny that you should have forgotten! Whenever
+she opened her lips, roses, and diamonds, and rubies fell out. That
+would be the very thing! Then they'd <i>have</i> to attend to me! Oh, do be a
+kind old fairy and give me a gift like that&mdash;do, <i>do</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>'Now, don't be so impetuous! You forget that this is not the time of
+year for roses, and, as for jewels, well, I don't think I can be very
+far wrong in supposing that you open your lips pretty frequently in the
+course of the day?'</p>
+
+<p>'Alick does call me a "mag,"' said Priscilla; 'but that's wrong, because
+I never speak without having something to say. I don't think people
+ought to&mdash;it may do so <i>much</i> harm; mayn't it?'</p>
+
+<p>'Undoubtedly. But, anyhow, if we made it <i>every</i> time you opened your
+lips, you would soon ruin me in precious stones, that's plain! No, I
+think we had better say that the jewels shall only drop when you are
+saying something you wish to be particularly improving&mdash;how will that
+do?'</p>
+
+<p>'Very nicely indeed, ma'am, thank you,' said Priscilla, 'because, you
+see, it comes to just the same thing.'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, well, try to be as economical of your good things as you
+can&mdash;remember that in these hard<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[Pg 47]</a></span> times a poor old fairy's riches are
+not as inexhaustible as they used to be.'</p>
+
+<p>'And jewels really will drop out?'</p>
+
+<p>'Whenever they are wanted to "point a moral and adorn a tale,"' said the
+old woman (who, for a fairy, was particularly well-read). 'There, run
+along home, do, and scatter your pearls before your relations.'</p>
+
+<p>It need scarcely be said that Priscilla was only too willing to obey;
+she ran all the way home with a light heart, eager to exhibit her
+wonderful gift. 'How surprised they will be!' she was thinking. 'If it
+had been Betty, instead of me, I suppose she would have come back
+talking toads! It would have been a good lesson for her&mdash;but still,
+toads are nasty things, and it would have been rather unpleasant for the
+rest of us. I think I won't tell Betty <i>where</i> I met the fairy.'</p>
+
+<p>She came in and took her place demurely at the family luncheon, which
+was the children's dinner; they were all seated already, including her
+father, who had got through most of his writing in the course of the
+morning.</p>
+
+<p>'Now make haste and eat your dinner, Priscilla,' said her mother, 'or it
+will be quite cold.'</p>
+
+<p>'I always let it get a little cold, mother,' replied the good little
+girl, 'so that I mayn't come to think too much about eating, you know.'</p>
+
+<p>As she uttered this remark, she felt a jewel <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[Pg 48]</a></span>producing itself in some
+mysterious way from the tip of her tongue, and saw it fall with a
+clatter into her plate. 'I'll pretend not to notice anything,' she
+thought.</p>
+
+<p>'Hullo!' exclaimed Alick, pausing in the act of mastication, 'I
+say&mdash;<i>Prissie</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>'If you ask mother, I'm sure she will tell you that it is most
+ill-mannered to speak with your mouth full,' said Priscilla, her speech
+greatly impeded by an immense emerald.</p>
+
+<p>'I like that!' exclaimed her rude brother; 'who's speaking with their
+mouth full <i>now</i>?'</p>
+
+<p>'"<i>Their</i>" is not grammar, dear,' was Priscilla's only reply to this
+taunt, as she delicately ejected a pearl, 'you should say <i>her</i> mouth
+full.' For Priscilla's grammar was as good as her principles.</p>
+
+<p>'But really, Priscilla, dear,' said her mother, who felt some
+embarrassment at so novel an experience as being obliged to find fault
+with her little daughter, 'you should not eat sweets just before dinner,
+and&mdash;and couldn't you get rid of them in some other manner?'</p>
+
+<p>'Sweets!' cried Priscilla, considerably annoyed at being so
+misunderstood, 'they are not <i>sweets,</i> mother. Look!' And she offered to
+submit one for inspection.</p>
+
+<p>'If I may venture to express an opinion,' observed her father, 'I would
+rather that a child of mine should suck sweets than coloured beads, and
+in either<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[Pg 49]</a></span> case I object to having them prominently forced upon my
+notice at meal-times. But I daresay I'm wrong. I generally am.'</p>
+
+<p>'Papa is quite right, dear,' said her mother, 'it <i>is</i> such a dangerous
+habit&mdash;suppose you were to swallow one, you know! Put them in the fire,
+like a good girl, and go on with your dinner.'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla rose without a word, her cheeks crimsoning, and dropped the
+pearl, ruby, and emerald, with great accuracy, into the very centre of
+the fire. This done, she returned to her seat, and went on with her
+dinner in silence, though her feelings prevented her from eating very
+much.</p>
+
+<p>'If they choose to think my pearls are only beads, or jujubes, or
+acidulated drops,' she said to herself, bitterly, 'I won't waste any
+more on them, that's all! I won't open my lips again, except to say
+quite ordinary things&mdash;so <i>there</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>If Priscilla had not been such a very good little girl, you might almost
+have thought she was in a temper; but she was not; her feelings were
+wounded, that was all, which is quite a different thing.</p>
+
+<p>That afternoon, her aunt Margarine, Mrs. Hoyle, came to call. She was
+the aunt whom we have already mentioned as being given to insincerity;
+she was not well off, and had a tendency to flatter people; but
+Priscilla was fond of her notwithstanding, and she had never detected
+her in any insincerity towards herself. She was sent into the
+drawing-room to <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[Pg 50]</a></span>entertain her aunt until her mother was ready to come
+down, and her aunt, as usual, overwhelmed her with affectionate
+admiration. 'How pretty and well you are looking, my pet!' she began,
+'and oh, what a beautiful frock you have on!'</p>
+
+<p>'The little silkworms wore it before I did, aunt,' said Priscilla,
+modestly.</p>
+
+<p>'How sweet of you to say so! But they never looked half so well in it,
+I'll be bou&mdash;&mdash; Why, my child, you've dropped a stone out of a brooch or
+something. Look&mdash;on the carpet there!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh,' said Priscilla, carelessly, 'it was out of my mouth&mdash;not out of a
+brooch, I never wear jewellery. I think jewellery makes people grow so
+conceited; don't you, Aunt Margarine?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, indeed, dearest&mdash;indeed you are <i>so</i> right!' said her aunt (who
+wore a cameo-brooch as large as a tart upon her cloak), 'and&mdash;and surely
+that can't be a <i>diamond</i> in your lap?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, yes, it is. I met a fairy this morning in the lane, and so&mdash;&mdash;' and
+here Priscilla proceeded to narrate her wonderful experience. 'I thought
+it might perhaps make papa and mamma value me a little more than they
+do,' she said wistfully, as she finished her story, 'but they don't take
+the least notice; they made me put the jewels on the fire&mdash;they did,
+really!'</p>
+
+<p>'What blindness!' cried her aunt; 'how <i>can</i> people shut their eyes to
+such a treasure? And&mdash;and may I just have <i>one</i> look? What, you really<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[Pg 51]</a></span>
+don't want them?&mdash;I may keep them for my very own? You precious love!
+Ah, I know a humble home where you would be appreciated at your proper
+worth. What would I not give for my poor naughty Belle and Cathie to
+have the advantage of seeing more of such a cousin!'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't know whether I could do them much good,' said Priscilla, 'but I
+would try my best.'</p>
+
+<p>'I am sure you would!' said Aunt Margarine, 'and now, dearest sweet, I
+am going to ask your dear mamma to spare you to us for just a little
+while; we must both beg very hard.'</p>
+
+<p>'I'll go and tell nurse to pack my things now, and then I can go away
+with you,' said the little girl.</p>
+
+<p>When her mother heard of the invitation, she consented quite willingly.
+'To tell you the truth, Margarine,' she said, 'I shall be very glad for
+the child to have a change. She seems a little unhappy at home with us,
+and she behaved most unlike her usual self at lunch; it <i>can't</i> be
+natural for a child of her age to chew large glass beads. Did your
+Cathie and Belle ever do such a thing?'</p>
+
+<p>'Never,' said Aunt Margarine, coughing. 'It is a habit that certainly
+ought to be checked, and I promise you, my dear Lucy, that if you will
+only trust Priscilla to me, I will take away anything of that kind the
+very moment I find it. And I do think, poor as we are, we shall manage
+to make her feel at home. We are all so fond of your sweet Priscilla!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[Pg 52]</a></span></p><p>So the end of it was that Priscilla went to stay with her aunt that
+very afternoon, and her family bore the parting with the greatest
+composure.</p>
+
+<p>'I can't give you nice food, or a pretty bedroom to sleep in such as you
+have at home,' said her kind aunt. 'We are very plain people, my pet;
+but at least we can promise you a warm welcome.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, auntie,' protested Priscilla, 'you mustn't think I mind a little
+hardship! Why, if beds weren't hard and food not nicely cooked now and
+then, we should soon grow too luxurious to do our duty, and that would
+be so very bad for us!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, what <i>beauties</i>!' cried her aunt, involuntarily, as she stooped to
+recover several sparkling gems from the floor of the cab. 'I mean&mdash;it's
+better to pick them up, dear, don't you think? they might get in
+people's <i>way</i>, you know. What a blessing you will be in our simple
+home! I want you to do all you can to instruct your cousins; don't be
+afraid of telling them of any faults you may happen to see. Poor Cathie
+and Belle, I fear they are very far from being all they should be!' and
+Aunt Margarine heaved a sigh.</p>
+
+<p>'Never mind, auntie; they will be better in time, I am sure. <i>I</i> wasn't
+<i>always</i> a good girl.'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla thoroughly enjoyed the first few days of her visit; even her
+aunt was only too grateful for instruction, and begged that Priscilla
+would tell her, quite candidly, of any shortcomings she might notice.
+And Priscilla, very kindly and considerately, always<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[Pg 53]</a></span> <i>did</i> tell her.
+Belle and Catherine were less docile, and she saw that it would take her
+some time to win their esteem and affection; but this was just what
+Priscilla liked: it was the usual experience of the heroines in the
+books, and much more interesting, too, than conquering her cousins'
+hearts at once.</p>
+
+<p>Still, both Catherine and Belle persistently hardened their hearts
+against their gentle little cousin in the unkindest way; they would
+scarcely speak to her, and chose to make a grievance out of the fact
+that one or other of them was obliged, by their mother's strict orders,
+to be constantly in attendance upon her, in order to pick up and bring
+Mrs. Hoyle all the jewels that Priscilla scattered in profusion wherever
+she went.</p>
+
+<p>'If you would only carry a plate about with you, Priscilla,' complained
+Belle one day, 'you could catch the jewels in that.'</p>
+
+<p>'But I don't <i>want</i> to catch the jewels, dear Belle,' said Priscilla,
+with a playful but very sweet smile; 'if other people prize such things,
+that is not my fault, is it? <i>Jewels</i> do not make people any happier,
+Belle!'</p>
+
+<p>'I should think not!' exclaimed Belle. 'I'm sure my back perfectly aches
+with stooping, and so does Cathie's. There! that big topaz has just gone
+and rolled under the sideboard, and mother will be so angry if I don't
+get it out! It is too bad of you, Priscilla! <i>I</i> believe you do it on
+purpose!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[Pg 54]</a></span></p><p>'Ah, you will know me better some day, dear, was the gentle response.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, at all events, I think you might be naughty just now and then,
+Prissie, and give Cathie and me a half-holiday.'</p>
+
+<p>'I would do anything else to please you, dear, but not that; you must
+not ask me to do what is impossible.'</p>
+
+<p>Alas! not even this angelic behaviour, not even the loving admonitions,
+the tender rebukes, the shocked reproaches that fell, accompanied by
+perfect cascades of jewels, from the lips of our pattern little
+Priscilla, succeeded in removing the utterly unfounded prejudices of her
+cousins, though it was some consolation to feel that she was gradually
+acquiring a most beneficial influence over her aunt, who called
+Priscilla 'her little conscience.' For, you see, Priscilla's conscience
+had so little to do on her own account that it was always at the service
+of other people, and indeed quite enjoyed being useful, as was only
+natural to a conscientious conscience which felt that it could never
+have been created to be idle.</p>
+
+<p>Very soon another responsibility was added to little Priscilla's
+burdens. Her cousin Dick, the worldly one with the yellow boots, came
+home after his annual holiday, which, as he was the junior clerk in a
+large bank, he was obliged to take rather late in the year. She had
+looked forward to his return with some excitement. Dick, she knew, was
+frivolous and reckless<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[Pg 55]</a></span> in his habits&mdash;he went to the theatre
+occasionally and frequently spent an evening in playing billiards and
+smoking cigars at a friend's house. There would be real credit in
+reforming poor cousin Dick.</p>
+
+<p>He was not long, of course, in hearing of Priscilla's marvellous
+endowment, and upon the first occasion they were alone together treated
+her with a respect and admiration which he had very certainly never
+shown her before.</p>
+
+<p>'You're wonderful, Prissie!' he said; 'I'd no idea you had it in you!'</p>
+
+<p>'Nor had I, Dick; but it shows that even a little girl can do
+something.'</p>
+
+<p>'I should rather think so! and&mdash;and the way you look&mdash;as grave as a
+judge all the time! Prissie, I wish you'd tell me how you manage it, I
+wouldn't tell a soul.'</p>
+
+<p>'But I don't know, Dick. I only talk and the jewels come&mdash;that is all.'</p>
+
+<p>'You artful little girl! you can keep a secret, I see, but so can I. And
+you might tell me how you do the trick. What put you up to the dodge?
+I'm to be trusted, I assure you.'</p>
+
+<p>'Dick, you can't&mdash;you mustn't&mdash;think there is any trickery about it! How
+can you believe I could be such a wicked little girl as to play tricks?
+It was an old fairy that gave me the gift. I'm sure I don't know
+why&mdash;unless she thought that I was a good child and deserved to be
+encouraged.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[Pg 56]</a></span></p><p>'By Jove!' cried Dick, 'I never knew you were half such fun!'</p>
+
+<p>'I am not fun, Dick. I think fun is generally so very vulgar, and oh, I
+wish you wouldn't say "by Jove!" Surely you know he was a heathen god!'</p>
+
+<p>'I seem to have heard of him in some such capacity,' said Dick. 'I say,
+Prissie, what a ripping big ruby!'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, Dick, Dick, you are like the others! I'm afraid you think more of
+the jewels than of any words I may say&mdash;and yet <i>jewels</i> are common
+enough!'</p>
+
+<p>'They seem to be with you. Pearls, too, and such fine ones! Here,
+Priscilla, take them; they're your property.'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla put her hands behind her: 'No, indeed, Dick, they are of no
+use to me. Keep them, please; they may help to remind you of what I have
+said.'</p>
+
+<p>'It's awfully kind of you,' said Dick, looking really touched.
+'Then&mdash;since you put it in that way&mdash;thanks, I will, Priscilla. I'll
+have them made into a horse-shoe pin.'</p>
+
+<p>'You mustn't let it make you too fond of dress, then,' said Priscilla;
+'but I'm afraid you're that already, Dick.'</p>
+
+<p>'A diamond!' he cried; 'go on, Priscilla, I'm listening&mdash;pitch into me,
+it will do me a <i>lot</i> of good!'</p>
+
+<p>But Priscilla thought it wisest to say no more just then.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[Pg 57]</a></span></p><p>That night, after Priscilla and Cathie and Belle had gone to bed, Dick
+and his mother sat up talking until a late hour.</p>
+
+<p>'Is dear little cousin Priscilla to be a permanency in this
+establishment?' began her cousin, stifling a yawn, for there had been a
+rather copious flow of precious stones during the evening.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, I shall keep her with us as long as I can,' said Mrs. Hoyle,
+'she's such a darling, and they don't seem to want her at home. I'm
+sure, limited as my means are, I'm most happy to have such a visitor.'</p>
+
+<p>'She seems to pay her way&mdash;only her way is a trifle trying at times,
+isn't it? She lectured me for half an hour on end without a single
+check!'</p>
+
+<p>'Are you sure you picked them all up, dear boy?'</p>
+
+<p>'Got a few of the best in my waistcoat-pocket now. I'm afraid I
+scrunched a pearl or two, though: they were all over the place, you
+know. I suppose you've been collecting too, mater?'</p>
+
+<p>'I picked up one or two,' said his mother; 'I should think I must have
+nearly enough now to fill a bandbox. And that brings me to what I wanted
+to consult you about, Richard. How are we to dispose of them? She has
+given them all to me.'</p>
+
+<p>'You haven't done anything with them yet, then?'</p>
+
+<p>'How could I? I have been obliged to stay at home: I've been so afraid
+of letting that precious<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[Pg 58]</a></span> child go out of my sight for a single hour,
+for fear some unscrupulous persons might get hold of her. I thought that
+perhaps, when you came home, you would dispose of the jewels for me.'</p>
+
+<p>'But, mater,' protested Dick, 'I can't go about asking who'll buy a
+whole bandbox full of jewels!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, very well, then; I suppose we must go on living this hugger-mugger
+life when we have the means of being as rich as princes, just because
+you are too lazy and selfish to take a little trouble!'</p>
+
+<p>'I know something about these things,' said Dick. 'I know a fellow who's
+a diamond merchant, and it's not so easy to sell a lot of valuable
+stones as you seem to imagine, mother. And then Priscilla really
+overdoes it, you know&mdash;why, if she goes on like this, she'll make
+diamonds as cheap as currants!'</p>
+
+<p>'<i>I</i> should have thought that was a reason for selling them as soon as
+possible; but I'm only a woman, and of course <i>my</i> opinion is worth
+nothing! Still, you might take some of the biggest to your friend, and
+accept whatever he'll give you for them&mdash;there are plenty more, you
+needn't haggle over the price.'</p>
+
+<p>'He'd want to know all about them, and what should I say? I can't tell
+him a cousin of mine produces them whenever she feels disposed.'</p>
+
+<p>'You could say they have been in the family for some time, and you are
+obliged to part with them; I don't ask you to tell a falsehood,
+Richard.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[Pg 59]</a></span></p><p>'Well, to tell you the honest truth,' said Dick, 'I'd rather have
+nothing to do with it. I'm not proud, but I shouldn't like it to get
+about among our fellows at the bank that I went about hawking diamonds.'</p>
+
+<p>'But, you stupid, undutiful boy, don't you see that you could leave the
+bank&mdash;you need never do anything any more&mdash;we should all live rich and
+happy somewhere in the country, if we could only sell those jewels! And
+you won't do that one little thing!'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Dick, 'I'll think over it. I'll see what I can do.'</p>
+
+<p>And his mother knew that it was perfectly useless to urge him any
+further: for, in some things, Dick was as obstinate as a mule, and, in
+others, far too easy-going and careless ever to succeed in life. He had
+promised to think over it, however, and she had to be contented with
+that.</p>
+
+<p>On the evening following this conversation cousin Dick entered the
+sitting-room the moment after his return from the City, and found his
+mother to all appearances alone.</p>
+
+<p>'What a dear sweet little guileless angel cousin Priscilla is, to be
+sure!' was his first remark.</p>
+
+<p>'Then you <i>have</i> sold some of the stones!' cried Aunt Margarine. 'Sit
+down, like a good boy, and tell me all about it.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Dick, 'I took the finest diamonds and rubies and pearls
+that escaped from that saintlike<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[Pg 60]</a></span> child last night in the course of some
+extremely disparaging comments on my character and pursuits&mdash;I took
+those jewels to Faycett and Rosewater's in New Bond Street&mdash;you know the
+shop, on the right-hand side as you go up&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, go on, Dick; go on&mdash;never mind <i>where</i> it is&mdash;how much did you get
+for them?'</p>
+
+<p>'I'm coming to that; keep cool, dear mamma. Well, I went in, and I saw
+the manager, and I said: "I want you to make these up into a horse-shoe
+scarf-pin for me."'</p>
+
+<p>'You said that! You never tried to sell one? Oh, Dick, you are too
+provoking!'</p>
+
+<p>'Hold on, mater; I haven't done yet. So the manager&mdash;a very gentlemanly
+person, rather thin on the top of the head&mdash;not that that affects his
+business capacities; for, after all&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'Dick, do you want to drive me frantic!'</p>
+
+<p>'I can't conceive any domestic occurrence which would be more
+distressing or generally inconvenient, mother dear. You do interrupt a
+fellow so! I forgot where I was now&mdash;oh, the manager, ah yes! Well, the
+manager said, "We shall be very happy to have the stones made in any
+design you may select"&mdash;jewellery, by the way, seems to exercise a most
+refining influence upon the manners: this man had the deportment of a
+duke&mdash;"you may select," he said; "but of course I need not tell you that
+none of these stones are genuine."'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[Pg 61]</a></span></p><p>'Not genuine!' cried Aunt Margarine excitedly. 'They must be&mdash;he was
+lying!'</p>
+
+<p>'West-end jewellers never lie,' said Dick; 'but naturally, when he said
+that, I told him I should like to have some proof of his assertion.
+"Will you take the risk of testing?" said he. "Test away, my dear man!"
+said I. So he brought a little wheel near the emerald&mdash;"whizz!" and away
+went the emerald! Then he let a drop of something fall on the ruby&mdash;and
+it fizzled up for all the world like pink champagne. "Go on, don't mind
+<i>me</i>!" I told him, so he touched the diamond with an electric
+wire&mdash;"phit!" and there was only something that looked like the ash of a
+shocking bad cigar. Then the pearls&mdash;and they popped like so many
+air-balloons. "Are you satisfied?" he asked.</p>
+
+<p>'"Oh, perfectly,"' said I, "you needn't trouble about the horse-shoe pin
+now. Good evening," and so I came away, after thanking him for his very
+amusing scientific experiments.'</p>
+
+<p>'And do you believe that the jewels are all shams, Dick?&mdash;do you
+really?'</p>
+
+<p>'I think it so probable that nothing on earth will induce me to offer a
+single one for sale. I should never hear the last of it at the bank. No,
+mater, dear little Priscilla's sparkling conversation may be unspeakably
+precious from a moral point of view, but it has no commercial value.
+Those jewels are bogus&mdash;shams every stone of them!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[Pg 62]</a></span></p><p>Now, all this time our heroine had been sitting unperceived in a corner
+behind a window-curtain, reading 'The Wide, Wide World,' a work which
+she was never weary of perusing. Some children would have come forward
+earlier, but Priscilla was never a forward child, and she remained as
+quiet as a little mouse up to the moment when she could control her
+feelings no longer.</p>
+
+<p>'It isn't true!' she cried passionately, bursting out of her retreat and
+confronting her cousin; 'it's cruel and unkind to say my jewels are
+shams! They are real&mdash;they are, they <i>are</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>'Hullo, Prissie!' said her abandoned cousin; 'so you combine
+jewel-dropping with eaves-dropping, eh?'</p>
+
+<p>'How dare you!' cried Aunt Margarine, almost beside herself, 'you odious
+little prying minx, setting up to teach your elders and your betters
+with your cut and dried priggish maxims! When I think how I have petted
+and indulged you all this time, and borne with the abominable litter you
+left in every room you entered&mdash;and now to find you are only a little,
+conceited, hypocritical impostor&mdash;oh, <i>why</i> haven't I words to express
+my contempt for such conduct&mdash;why am I dumb at such a moment as this?'</p>
+
+<p>'Come, mother,' said her son soothingly, 'that's not such a bad
+beginning; I should call it fairly fluent and expressive, myself.'</p>
+
+<p>'Be quiet, Dick! I'm speaking to this wicked child, who has obtained our
+love and sympathy and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[Pg 63]</a></span> attention on false pretences, for which she ought
+to be put in prison&mdash;yes, in <i>prison</i>, for such a heartless trick on
+relatives who can ill afford to be so cruelly disappointed!'</p>
+
+<p>'But, aunt!' expostulated poor Priscilla, 'you always said you only kept
+the jewels as souvenirs, and that it did you so much good to hear me
+talk!'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't argue with <i>me</i>, miss! If I had known the stones were wretched
+tawdry imitations, do you imagine for an instant&mdash;&mdash;?'</p>
+
+<p>'Now, mother,' said Dick, 'be fair&mdash;they were uncommonly good
+imitations, you must admit that!'</p>
+
+<p>'Indeed, indeed I thought they were real, the fairy never told me!'</p>
+
+<p>'After all,' said Dick, 'it's not Priscilla's fault. She can't help it
+if the stones aren't real, and she made up for quality by quantity
+anyhow; didn't you, Prissie?'</p>
+
+<p>'Hold your tongue, Richard; she <i>could</i> help it, she knew it all the
+time, and she's a hateful, sanctimonious little stuck-up viper, and so I
+tell her to her face!'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla could scarcely believe that kind, indulgent, smooth-spoken
+Aunt Margarine could be addressing such words to her; it frightened her
+so much that she did not dare to answer, and just then Cathie and Belle
+came into the room.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, mother,' they began penitently, 'we're <i>so</i><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[Pg 64]</a></span> sorry, but we couldn't
+find dear Prissie anywhere, so we haven't picked up anything the whole
+afternoon!'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, my poor darlings, you shall never be your cousin's slaves any more.
+Don't go near her, she's a naughty, deceitful wretch; her jewels are
+false, my sweet loves, false! She has imposed upon us all, she does not
+deserve to associate with you!'</p>
+
+<p>'I always said Prissie's jewels looked like the things you get on
+crackers!' said Belle, tossing her head.</p>
+
+<p>'Now we shall have a little rest, I hope,' chimed in Cathie.</p>
+
+<p>'I shall send her home to her parents this very night,' declared Aunt
+Margarine; 'she shall not stay here to pervert our happy household with
+her miserable <i>gewgaws</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>Here Priscilla found her tongue. 'Do you think I <i>want</i> to stay?' she
+said proudly; 'I see now that you only wanted to have me here
+because&mdash;because of the horrid jewels, and I never knew they were false,
+and I let you have them all, every one, you know I did; and I wanted you
+to mind what I said and not trouble about picking them up, but you
+<i>would</i> do it! And now you all turn round upon me like this! What have I
+done to be treated so? What have I done?'</p>
+
+<p>'Bravo, Prissie!' cried Dick. 'Mother, if you ask me, I think it serves
+us all jolly well right, and it's<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[Pg 65]</a></span> a downright shame to bullyrag poor
+Prissie in this way!'</p>
+
+<p>'I <i>don't</i> ask you,' retorted his mother, sharply; 'so you will kindly
+keep your opinions to yourself.'</p>
+
+<p>'Tra-la-la!' sang rude Dick, 'we are a united family&mdash;we are, we are, we
+<i>are</i>!'&mdash;a vulgar refrain he had picked up at one of the burlesque
+theatres he was only too fond of frequenting.</p>
+
+<p>But Priscilla came to him and held out her hand quite gratefully and
+humbly. 'Thank you, Dick,' she said; '<i>you</i> are kind, at all events. And
+I am sorry you couldn't have your horse-shoe pin!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, <i>hang</i> the horse-shoe pin!' exclaimed Dick, and poor Priscilla was
+so thoroughly cast down that she quite forgot to reprove him.</p>
+
+<p>She was not sent home that night after all, for Dick protested against
+it in such strong terms that even Aunt Margarine saw that she must give
+way; but early on the following morning Priscilla quitted her aunt's
+house, leaving her belongings to be sent on after her.</p>
+
+<p>She had not far to walk, and it so happened that her way led through the
+identical lane in which she had met the fairy. Wonderful to relate,
+there, on the very same stone and in precisely the same attitude, sat
+the old lady, peering out from under her poke-bonnet, and resting her
+knotty old hands on her crutch-handled stick!</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla walked past with her head in the air,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[Pg 66]</a></span> pretending not to
+notice her, for she considered that the fairy had played her a most
+malicious and ill-natured trick.</p>
+
+<p>'Heyday!' said the old lady (it is only fairies who can permit
+themselves such old-fashioned expressions nowadays). 'Heyday, why,
+here's my good little girl again! Isn't she going to speak to me?'</p>
+
+<p>'No, she's not,' said Priscilla&mdash;but she found herself compelled to
+stop, notwithstanding.</p>
+
+<p>'Why, what's all this about? You're not going to sulk with me, my dear,
+are you?'</p>
+
+<p>'I think you're a very cruel, bad, unkind old woman for deceiving me
+like this!'</p>
+
+<p>'Goodness me! Why, didn't the jewels come, after all?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes&mdash;they came, only they were all horrid artificial ones&mdash;and it is a
+shame, it <i>is</i>!' cried poor Priscilla from her bursting heart.</p>
+
+<p>'Artificial, were they? that really is very odd! Can you account for
+that at all, now?'</p>
+
+<p>'Of course I can't! You told me that they would drop out whenever I said
+anything to improve people&mdash;and I was <i>always</i> saying <i>something</i>
+improving! Aunt had a bandbox in her room quite full of them.'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, you've been very industrious, evidently; it's unfortunate your
+jewels should all have been artificial&mdash;most unfortunate. I don't know
+how to explain it, unless'&mdash;(and here the old lady looked up queerly
+from<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[Pg 67]</a></span> under her white eyelashes), 'unless your goodness was artificial
+too?'</p>
+
+<p>'How do you mean?' asked Priscilla, feeling strangely uncomfortable.
+'I'm sure I've never done anything the least bit naughty&mdash;how can my
+goodness possibly be artificial?'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, that I can't explain; but I know this&mdash;that people who are really
+good are generally the last persons to suspect it, and the moment they
+become aware of it and begin to think how good they are, and how bad
+everybody else is, why, somehow or other, their goodness crumbles away
+and leaves only a sort of outside shell behind it. And&mdash;I'm very old,
+and of course I may be mistaken&mdash;but I think (I only say I <i>think</i>,
+mind) that a little girl so young as you must have some faults hidden
+about her somewhere, and that perhaps on the whole she would be better
+employed in trying to find them out and cure them before she attempted
+to correct those of other people. And I'm sure it can't be good for any
+child to be always seeing herself in a little picture, just as she likes
+to fancy other people see her. Very many pretty books are written about
+good little girls, and it is quite true that children may exercise a
+great influence for good&mdash;more than they can ever tell, perhaps&mdash;but
+only just so long as they remain natural and unconscious, and not
+unwholesome little pragmatical prigesses; for then they make themselves
+and other people worse than they might have been. But of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[Pg 68]</a></span> course, my
+dear, you never made such a mistake as that!'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla turned very red, and began to scrape one of her feet against
+the other; she was thinking, and her thoughts were not at all pleasant
+ones.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, fairy,' she said at last, 'I'm afraid that's just what I <i>did</i> do.
+I was always thinking how good I was and putting everybody&mdash;papa, mamma,
+Alick, Betty, Aunt Margarine, Cathie, Belle, and even poor cousin
+Dick&mdash;right! I have been a horrid little hateful prig, and that's why
+all the jewels were rubbish. But, oh, shall I have to go on talking sham
+diamonds and things all the rest of my life?'</p>
+
+<p>'That,' said the fairy, 'depends entirely on yourself. You have the
+remedy in your own hands&mdash;or lips.'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, you mean I needn't talk at all? But I must&mdash;sometimes. I couldn't
+bear to be dumb as long as I lived&mdash;and it would look so odd, too!'</p>
+
+<p>'I never said you were not to open your lips at all. But can't you try
+to talk simply and naturally&mdash;not like little girls or boys in any
+story-books whatever&mdash;not to "show off" or improve people; only as a
+girl would talk who remembers that, after all, her elders are quite as
+likely as she is to know what they ought or ought not to do and say?'</p>
+
+<p>'I shall forget sometimes, I know I shall!' said Priscilla
+disconsolately.</p>
+
+<p>'If you do, there will be something to remind you, you know. And by and
+by, perhaps, as you grow up<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[Pg 69]</a></span> you may, quite by accident, say something
+sincere and noble and true&mdash;and then a jewel will fall which will really
+be of value!'</p>
+
+<p>'No!' cried Priscilla, 'no, <i>please</i>! Oh, fairy, let me off that! If I
+<i>must</i> drop them, let them be false ones to punish me&mdash;not real. I don't
+want to be rewarded any more for being good&mdash;if I ever am really good!'</p>
+
+<p>'Come,' said the fairy, with a much pleasanter smile, 'you are not a
+hopeless case, at all events. It shall be as you wish, then, and perhaps
+it will be the wisest arrangement for all parties. Now run away home,
+and see how little use you can make of your fairy gift.'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla found her family still at breakfast.</p>
+
+<p>'Why,' observed her father, raising his eyebrows as she entered the
+room, 'here's our little monitor&mdash;(or is it <i>monitress</i>, eh,
+Priscilla?)&mdash;back again. Children, we shall all have to mind our p's and
+q's&mdash;and, indeed, our entire alphabet, now!'</p>
+
+<p>'I'm sure,' said her mother, kissing her fondly, 'Priscilla knows we're
+all delighted to have her home!'</p>
+
+<p>'<i>I'm</i> not,' said Alick, with all a boy's engaging candour.</p>
+
+<p>'Nor am I,' added Betty, 'it's been ever so much nicer at home while
+she's been away!'</p>
+
+<p>Priscilla burst into tears as she hid her face upon<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[Pg 70]</a></span> her mother's
+protecting shoulder. 'It's true!' she sobbed, 'I don't deserve that you
+should be glad to see me&mdash;I've been hateful and horrid, I know&mdash;but, oh,
+if you'll only forgive me and love me and put up with me a little, I'll
+try not to preach and be a prig any more&mdash;I will truly!'</p>
+
+<p>And at this her father called her to his side and embraced her with a
+fervour he had not shown for a very long time.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>I should not like to go so far as to assert that no imitation diamond,
+ruby, pearl, or emerald ever proceeded from Priscilla's lips again.
+Habits are not cured in a day, and fairies&mdash;however old they may be&mdash;are
+still fairies; so it <i>did</i> occasionally happen that a mock jewel made an
+unwelcome appearance after one of Priscilla's more unguarded utterances.
+But she was always frightfully ashamed and abashed by such an accident,
+and buried the imitation stones immediately in a corner of the garden.
+And as time went on the jewels grew smaller and smaller, and frequently
+dissolved upon her tongue, leaving a faintly bitter taste, until at last
+they ceased altogether and Priscilla became as pleasant and unaffected a
+girl as she who may now be finishing this history.</p>
+
+<p>Aunt Margarine never sent back the contents of that bandbox; she kept
+the biggest stones and had a brooch made of them, while, as she never
+mentioned<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[Pg 71]</a></span> that they were false, no one out of the family ever so much
+as suspected it.</p>
+
+<p>But, for all that, she always declared that her niece Priscilla had
+bitterly disappointed her expectations&mdash;which was perhaps the truest
+thing that Aunt Margarine ever said.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[Pg 72]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="A_MATTER_OF_TASTE" id="A_MATTER_OF_TASTE"></a><i>A MATTER OF TASTE</i></h2>
+
+<h3><a name="PART1" id="PART1"></a>PART I</h3>
+
+<p>It is a little singular that, upon an engagement becoming known and
+being discussed by the friends and acquaintances of the persons
+principally concerned, by far the most usual tone of comment should be a
+sorrowing wonder. That particular alliance is generally the very last
+that anybody ever expected. 'What made him choose <i>her</i>, of all people,'
+and 'What on earth she could see in <i>him</i>,' are declared insoluble
+problems. It is confidently predicted that the engagement will never
+come to anything, or that, if such a marriage ever does take place, it
+is most unlikely to prove a success.</p>
+
+<p>Sometimes, in the case of female friends, this tone is even perceptible
+under their warmest felicitations, and through the smiling mask of
+compliment shine eyes moist with the most irritating quality of
+compassion. 'So glad! so delighted! But why, <i>why</i> didn't you consult
+<i>me</i>?'&mdash;this complicated expression might<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[Pg 73]</a></span> be rendered: 'I could have
+saved you from this&mdash;I <i>was</i> so pleased to hear of it!'</p>
+
+<p>And yet, in the majority of cases, these unions are not found to turn
+out so very badly after all, and the misguided couple seem really to
+have gauged their own hearts and their possibilities of happiness
+together more accurately than the most clear-sighted of their
+acquaintances.</p>
+
+<p>The announcement that Ella Hylton had accepted George Chapman provoked
+the customary sensation and surprise in their respective sets, and
+perhaps with rather more justification than usual.</p>
+
+<p>Miss Hylton had undeniable beauty of a spiritual and rather <i>exalt&eacute;</i>
+type, and was generally understood to be highly cultivated. She had
+spent a year at Somerville, though she had gone down without trying for
+a place in either 'Mods.' or 'Greats,' thereby preserving, if not
+increasing, her reputation for superiority. She had lived all her life
+among cultured people; she was devoted to music and regularly attended
+the Richter Concerts, though she could seldom be induced to play in
+public; she had a feeling for art, though she neither painted nor drew;
+a love of literature strong enough to deter her from all amateur efforts
+in that direction. In art, music and literature she was impatient of
+mediocrity; and, while she was as fond as most girls of the pleasures
+which upper middle-class society can offer, she reverenced intellect,
+and preferred the conversation of the plainest celebrity to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[Pg 74]</a></span> the
+platitudes of the mere dancing-man, no matter how handsome of feature
+and perfect of step he might be.</p>
+
+<p>George Chapman was certainly not a mere dancing-man, his waltzing being
+rather conscientious than dreamlike, and he was only tolerably
+good-looking. On the other hand, he was not celebrated in any way, and
+even his mother and sisters had never considered him brilliant. He had
+been educated at Rugby and Trinity, Cambridge, where he rowed a fairly
+good oar, on principle, and took a middle second in the Moral Science
+Tripos. Now he was in a solicitor's office, where he was receiving a
+good salary, and was valued as a steady, sensible young fellow, who
+could be thoroughly depended upon. He was fond of his profession, and
+had acquired a considerable knowledge of its details; apart from it he
+had no very decided tastes; he lived a quiet, regular life, and dined
+out and went to dances in moderation; his manner, though he was nearly
+twenty-six, was still rather boyishly blunt.</p>
+
+<p>What there was in him that had found favour in Ella Hylton's fastidious
+eyes the narrator is not rash enough to attempt to particularise. But it
+may be suggested that the most unlikely people may possess their fairy
+rose and ring which render them irresistible to at least one heart, if
+they only have faith to believe in and luck to perceive their power.</p>
+
+<p>So, early in the year, George had plucked up<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[Pg 75]</a></span> courage to propose to Miss
+Hylton, after meeting and secretly adoring her for some months past, and
+she, to the general astonishment, had accepted him.</p>
+
+<p>He had a private income&mdash;not a large one&mdash;of his own, and had saved out
+of it. She was entitled under her grandmother's will to a sum which made
+her an heiress in a modest way, and thus there was no reason why the
+engagement should be a long one, and, though no date had been definitely
+fixed for the marriage, it was understood that it should take place at
+some time before the end of the summer.</p>
+
+<p>Soon after the engagement, however, an invalid aunt with whom Ella had
+always been a great favourite was ordered to the south of France, and
+implored her to go with her; which Ella, who had a real affection for
+her relative, as well as a strong sense of duty, had consented to do.</p>
+
+<p>This was a misfortune in one of two ways: it either curtailed that most
+necessary and most delightful period during which <i>fianc&eacute;s</i> discover one
+another's idiosyncrasies and weaknesses, or it made it necessary to
+postpone the marriage.</p>
+
+<p>George naturally preferred the former, as the more endurable evil; but
+Ella's letters from abroad began to hint more and more plainly at delay.
+Her aunt might remain on the Continent all the summer, and she could not
+possibly leave her; there was so much to be done after her return that
+could not be done in a hurry; they had not even begun to furnish the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[Pg 76]</a></span>
+pretty little house on Campden Hill that was to be their new home&mdash;it
+would be better to wait till November, or even later.</p>
+
+<p>The mere idea was alarming to George, and he remonstrated as far as he
+dared; but Ella remained firm, and he grew desperate.</p>
+
+<p>He might have spared himself the trouble. About the middle of June
+Ella's aunt&mdash;who, of course, had had to leave the Riviera&mdash;grew tired of
+travelling, and Ella, to George's intense satisfaction, returned to her
+mother's house in Linden Gardens, Notting Hill.</p>
+
+<p>And now, when our story opens, George, who had managed to get away from
+office-work two hours before his usual time, was hurrying towards Linden
+Gardens as fast as a hansom could take him, to see his betrothed for the
+first time after their long separation.</p>
+
+<p>He was eager, naturally, and a little nervous. Would Ella still persist
+in her wish for delay? or would he be able to convince her that there
+were no obstacles in the way? He felt he had strong arguments on his
+side, if only&mdash;and here was the real seat of his anxiety&mdash;if only her
+objections were not raised from some other motive! She might have been
+trying to prepare him for a final rupture, and then&mdash;'Well,' he
+concluded, with his customary good sense, 'no use meeting trouble
+halfway&mdash;in five minutes I shall know for certain!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[Pg 77]</a></span></p><hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>At the same moment Mrs. Hylton and her daughter Flossie, a vivacious
+girl in the transitionary sixteen-year-old stage, were in the
+drawing-room at Linden Gardens. It was the ordinary double drawing-room
+of a London house, but everything in it was beautiful and harmonious.
+The eye was vaguely rested by the delicate and subdued colour of walls
+and hangings; cabinets, antique Persian pottery, rare bits of china, all
+occupied the precise place in which their decorative value was most
+felt; a room, in short, of exceptional individuality and distinction.</p>
+
+<p>Flossie was standing at the window, from which a glimpse could just be
+caught of fresh green foliage and the lodge-gates, with the bustle of
+the traffic in the High Street beyond; Mrs. Hylton was writing at a
+Flemish bureau in the corner.</p>
+
+<p>'I suppose,' said Flossie meditatively, as she fingered a piece of old
+stained glass that was hanging in the window, 'we shall have George here
+this afternoon.'</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Hylton raised her head. She had a striking face, tinted a clear
+olive, with a high wave of silver hair crowning the forehead; her
+eyebrows were dark, and so were the brilliant eyes; the nose was
+aquiline, and the thin, well-cut mouth a little hard. She was a woman
+who had been much admired in her time, and who still retained a certain
+attraction, though some were apt to find her somewhat cold and
+unsympathetic.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[Pg 78]</a></span> Her daughter Ella, for example, was always secretly a
+little in awe of her mother, who, however, had no terrors for audacious,
+outspoken Flossie.</p>
+
+<p>'If he comes, Flossie, he will be very welcome,' she said, 'but I hardly
+expect him yet. George is not likely to neglect his duties, even for
+Ella.'</p>
+
+<p>Flossie pursed her mouth rather scornfully: 'Oh, George is immaculate!'
+she murmured.</p>
+
+<p>'If he was, it would hardly be a reproach,' said her mother, catching
+the word; 'but, at all events, George has thoroughly good principles,
+and is sure to succeed in the world. I have every reason to be pleased.'</p>
+
+<p>'Every reason?&mdash;ah! but <i>are</i> you pleased? Mother, dear, you know he's
+as dull as dull!'</p>
+
+<p>'Ella does not find him so&mdash;and, Flossie, I don't like to hear you say
+such things, even in Ella's absence.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I never abuse him to Ella; it wouldn't be any use: she's firmly
+convinced that he's perfection&mdash;at least she was before she went away.'</p>
+
+<p>'Why? do you mean that she has altered?&mdash;have you seen any sign of it,
+Flossie?'</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Hylton made this inquiry sharply, but not as if such a circumstance
+would be altogether displeasing to her.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, no; only she hasn't seen him for so long, you know. Perhaps, when
+she comes to look at him with fresh eyes, she'll notice things more. Ah,
+here <i>is</i><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[Pg 79]</a></span> George, just getting out of a hansom&mdash;so he has played truant
+for once! There's one thing I <i>do</i> think Ella might do&mdash;persuade him to
+shave off some of those straggly whiskers. I wonder why he never seems
+to get a hat or anything else like other people's!'</p>
+
+<p>Presently George was announced. He was slightly above middle height,
+broad-shouldered and fresh-coloured; the obnoxious whiskers did indeed
+cover more of his cheeks than modern fashion prescribes for men of his
+age, and had evidently never known a razor; he wore a turn-down collar
+and a necktie of a rather crude red; his clothes were neat and well
+brushed, but not remarkable for their cut.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, my dear George,' said Mrs. Hylton, 'we have seen very little of
+you while Ella has been away.'</p>
+
+<p>'I know,' he said awkwardly; 'I've had a lot of things to look after in
+one way and another.'</p>
+
+<p>'What? after your work at the office was over!' cried Flossie
+incredulously.</p>
+
+<p>'Yes&mdash;after that; it's taken up my time a good deal.'</p>
+
+<p>'And so you couldn't spare any to call here&mdash;I see!' said Flossie.
+'George,' she added, with a sudden diversion, 'I wonder you aren't
+afraid of catching cold! How <i>can</i> you go about in such absurdly thin
+boots as those?'</p>
+
+<p>'These?' he said, inspecting them doubtfully&mdash;they were strong, sensible
+boots with notched and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[Pg 80]</a></span> projecting soles of ponderous thickness&mdash;'why,
+what's the matter with them, Flossie, eh? Don't you think they're strong
+enough for walking in?'</p>
+
+<p>'No, George; they're the very things for an afternoon dance, and quite a
+lot of couples could dance in them, you see. But for walking&mdash;ah, I'm
+afraid you sacrifice too much to appearances.'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't, really!' George protested in all good faith; 'now <i>do</i> I, Mrs.
+Hylton?'</p>
+
+<p>'Flossie is making fun of you, George; you mustn't mind her
+impertinence.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, is that all? Do you know, I really thought for the moment that she
+meant they were too small for me! You like getting a rise out of me,
+Flossie, don't you?'</p>
+
+<p>And he laughed with such genuine and good-natured amusement that the
+young lady felt somehow a little small, and almost ashamed, although it
+took the form of suppressed irritation. 'He really ought not to come
+here in such things,' she said to herself; 'and I don't believe that,
+even now, he sees what I meant.'</p>
+
+<p>Just at this point Ella came in, with the least touch of shyness,
+perhaps, at meeting him before witnesses after so long an absence; but
+she only looked the more charming in consequence, and, demure as her
+greeting was, her pretty eyes had a sparkle of pleasure that scattered
+all George Chapman's fears to the winds. Even Flossie felt instinctively
+that<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[Pg 81]</a></span> straggly-whiskered, red-necktied, thick-booted George had lost
+none of his divinity for Ella.</p>
+
+<p>They did not seem to have much to say to one another, notwithstanding;
+possibly because Ella was called upon to dispense the tea which had just
+been brought in. George sat nursing the hat which Flossie found so
+objectionable, while he balanced a teacup with the anxious eye of a
+juggler out of practice, and the conversation flagged. At last, under
+pretence of renewing his tea, most of which he had squandered upon a
+Persian rug, he crossed to Ella: 'I say,' he suggested, 'don't you think
+you could come out for a little while? I've such lots to tell you
+and&mdash;and I want you to go somewhere with me.'</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Hylton made no objection, beyond stipulating that Ella must not be
+allowed to tire herself after her journey, and so, a few minutes later,
+Miss Hylton came down in her pretty summer hat and light cape, and she
+and George were allowed to set out.</p>
+
+<p>Once outside the house, he drew a long breath of mingled relief and
+pleasure: 'By Jove, Ella, I am glad to get you back again! I say, how
+jolly you do look in that hat! Now, do you know where I'm going to take
+you?'</p>
+
+<p>'It will be quietest in the Gardens,' said Ella.</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, but that's not where you're going now,' he said with a delicious
+assumption of authority; 'you're coming with me to see a certain house
+on Campden Hill you may have heard of.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[Pg 82]</a></span></p><p>'That will be delightful. I do want to see our dear little house again
+very much. And, George, we will go carefully over all the rooms, and
+settle what can be done with each of them. Then we can begin directly;
+we haven't too much time.'</p>
+
+<p>'Perhaps,' he said with a conscious laugh, 'it won't take so much time
+as you think.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, but it <i>must</i>&mdash;to do properly. And while I've been away I've had
+some splendid ideas for some of the rooms&mdash;I've planned them out so
+beautifully. You know that delightful little room at the back?&mdash;the one
+I said should be your own den, with the window all festooned with
+creepers and looking out on the garden&mdash;well&mdash;&mdash;?'</p>
+
+<p>'Take my advice,' he said, 'and don't make any plans till you see it.
+And as for plans, these furnishing fellows do all that&mdash;they don't care
+to be bothered with plans.'</p>
+
+<p>'They will have to carry out ours, though. I shall love settling how it
+is all to be&mdash;it will be such fun.'</p>
+
+<p>'You wouldn't call it fun if you knew what it was like, I can tell you.'</p>
+
+<p>'But I <i>do</i> know. Mother and I rearranged most of the rooms at home only
+last year&mdash;so you see I have some experience. And what experience can
+<i>you</i> have had, if you please?'</p>
+
+<p>Ella had a mental vision as she spoke of the house in Dawson Place when
+George lived with his mother and sisters&mdash;a house in which furniture and
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[Pg 83]</a></span>everything else were commonplace and <i>bourgeois</i> to the last degree,
+and where nothing could have been altered since his boyhood; indeed she
+had often secretly pitied him for having to live in such surroundings,
+and admired the filial patience that had made him endure them so long.</p>
+
+<p>'I've had my share, Ella, and I should be very sorry for you to have all
+the worry and bother I've been through over it!'</p>
+
+<p>'But when, George? How? I don't understand.'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, that's my secret!' he said provokingly; 'and you know, Ella, if we
+began furnishing now, it would take no end of a time, with all these
+wonderful plans of yours, and&mdash;and I couldn't stand having to wait till
+next November for you&mdash;I couldn't do it!'</p>
+
+<p>'Mother thinks the marriage need not be put off now,' said Ella simply,
+'and we shall have six weeks till then; the house can be quite ready for
+us by the time we want it.'</p>
+
+<p>'Six weeks!' he said impatiently, 'what's six weeks? You've no idea what
+these chaps are, Ella! And then there are all your own things to get,
+and they would take up most of your time. No, we should have had to put
+it off, whatever you may say. And that would mean another
+separation&mdash;for, of course, you would go away in August, and I should
+have to stay in town: the office wouldn't give me my fortnight twice
+over&mdash;honeymoon or no honeymoon!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[Pg 84]</a></span></p><p>Ella looked completely puzzled. 'But what are you trying to prove
+<i>now</i>, George?'</p>
+
+<p>'I was only showing you that, even though you have come back earlier, we
+couldn't possibly have got things ready in time, if I hadn't&mdash;&mdash;' but
+here he stopped. 'No, I want that to be a surprise for you, Ella; you'll
+see presently,' he added.</p>
+
+<p>Ella's delicate eyebrows contracted. 'I like to be prepared for my
+surprises, please, George. Tell me now.'</p>
+
+<p>They had turned up one of the quiet streets leading to the hill. They
+were so near the house that George thought he might abandon further
+mystery, not to mention that he was only too anxious to reveal his
+secret.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, then, Ella, if you must have it,' he said triumphantly, 'the
+house is very nearly ready <i>now</i>&mdash;what do you think of that?'</p>
+
+<p>'Do you mean that&mdash;that it is furnished, George?'</p>
+
+<p>'Papered, painted, decorated, furnished&mdash;everything, from top to bottom!
+I thought that would surprise you, Ella!'</p>
+
+<p>'I think,' she answered slowly, 'you might have told me you were doing
+it.'</p>
+
+<p>'What! before it was all done? That would have spoilt it all, dear. I
+should have written, though, if you hadn't been coming home so soon. And
+now it's finished I must say it looks uncommonly jolly. I'm<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[Pg 85]</a></span> sure you'll
+be pleased with it&mdash;it looks quite a different place.'</p>
+
+<p>She tried to smile: 'And did you do it all yourself, George?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, no&mdash;not exactly. I flatter myself I know how to see that the
+work's properly done, and all that; but there are some things I don't
+pretend to be much of a hand at, so I got certain ladies to give me some
+wrinkles.'</p>
+
+<p>Ella felt relieved. She was disappointed, it is true&mdash;hurt, even, at
+having been deprived of any voice in the matter. She had been looking
+forward so much to carrying out her pet schemes, to enjoying her
+friends' admiration of the wonders wrought by her artistic invention.
+And she had never thought of George, somehow, as likely to have any
+strikingly original ideas on the subject of decoration, although she
+liked him none the less for that.</p>
+
+<p>But it was something that he had had the good sense to take her mother
+and Flossie into his confidence: she knew she could trust them to
+preserve him from any serious mistakes.</p>
+
+<p>'You see,' said George, half apologetically, 'I would ever so much
+rather have waited till you came back, only I couldn't tell when that
+would be. I really couldn't help myself. You're sure you don't mind
+about it? If you only knew how I worked over it, rushing about from one
+place to another, as soon as I could get away from the office, picking
+up bits of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[Pg 86]</a></span> furniture here and there, standing over those beggars of
+painters and keeping 'em at it, and working out estimates and seeing
+foremen and managers and all kinds of chaps! I used to get home
+dead-tired of an evening; but I didn't mind that: I felt it was all
+bringing you nearer to me, darling, and that made everything a
+pleasure!'</p>
+
+<p>There was such honest affection in his look and voice; he had so
+evidently intended to please her, and had been in such manifest dread of
+any further separation from her, that she was completely disarmed.</p>
+
+<p>'Dear George,' she said gently, 'I am so sorry you took all the trouble
+on yourself; it was very, very good of you to care so much, and I know I
+shall be delighted with the house.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said George, 'I'm not much afraid about that, because I expect
+our tastes are pretty much the same in most things.'</p>
+
+<p>They were by this time at the house, and George, after a little fumbling
+with his as yet unfamiliar latchkey, threw open the door with a flourish
+and said, 'There you are, little woman! Walk in and you'll see what you
+shall see!'</p>
+
+<p>No sooner was Ella inside the hall than her heart sank: 'Looks neat and
+nice, doesn't it?' said George cheerfully. 'You'd almost take that paper
+for real marble, wouldn't you? See how well they've done those veins. I
+like this yellowish colour better than<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[Pg 87]</a></span> green, don't you? It looks so
+cool in summer. That's a good strong hall-lamp&mdash;not what you call high
+art, exactly&mdash;but gives a rattling good light, and that's the main
+thing. Here, I'll light it up for you&mdash;confound it! they haven't turned
+the gas on yet. However, there's too much sunshine for it to show much,
+if they had. This linoleum is a capital thing: you might scrub as long
+as you liked and you'd never get <i>that</i> pattern out!'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' Ella agreed, with a tragic little smile, 'it&mdash;it looks as if it
+would last.'</p>
+
+<p>'Last! I should just think so! And here's a hatstand&mdash;you could almost
+swear it was carved wood of some sort, but it's only cast-iron painted;
+indestructible, you see; they told me that was the latest
+dodge&mdash;wonderful how cheaply they turn them out, isn't it?'</p>
+
+<p>'I thought you said you were helped?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I didn't want any help <i>here</i>&mdash;this is only the passage, you know!'</p>
+
+<p>Yes, it was only the passage&mdash;and yet she had been picturing such a
+charming entrance, with a draped arch, a graceful lamp, a fresh bright
+paper, a small buffet of genuine old oak, and so on. She suppressed a
+sigh as she passed on; after all, so long as the rooms themselves were
+all right, it did not so very much matter, and she knew that her
+mother's taste could be trusted.</p>
+
+<p>But on the threshold of the dining-room she<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[Pg 88]</a></span> stopped aghast. The walls
+had been distempered a particularly hideous drab; the curtains were
+mustard yellow; the carpet was a dull brown; the mottled marble
+mantelpiece, for which she had been intending to substitute one in
+walnut wood with tiles, still shone in slabs of petrified brawn; there
+was a huge mahogany sideboard of a kind she had only seen in
+old-fashioned hotels.</p>
+
+<p>'Comfortable, eh?' remarked George. 'Lots of wear in those curtains!'</p>
+
+<p>Unhappily there was, as Ella was only too well aware. 'You did <i>this</i>
+room yourself too, then, George?' she managed to say, without betraying
+herself by her voice.</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, I chose everything here. You see, Ella, we shall only use this
+room for meals.'</p>
+
+<p>'Only for meals, yes,' she acquiesced with a shudder; 'but&mdash;George,
+surely you said mother had helped you with the rooms?'</p>
+
+<p>'What! your mother? No, Ella; her notions are rather too grand for me.
+It was Jessie and Carrie I meant. Just come and see what they've made of
+my den.'</p>
+
+<p>Ella followed. The window&mdash;which had commanded such a cheerful outlook
+into one of the pretty gardens, with a pink thorn, a laburnum-tree or
+two, and some sycamores which still flourish fresh and fair on Campden
+Hill&mdash;was obscured now by<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[Pg 89]</a></span> some detestable contrivance in transparent
+paper imitating stained glass.</p>
+
+<p>'That was the girls' notion,' said George, following the direction of
+her eyes; 'they fixed it all themselves&mdash;it was their present to me.
+Pretty of them to think of it, wasn't it? I call it an immense
+improvement, and, you see, it's stuck on with some patent cement
+varnish, so it can't rub off. You get the effect better if you stand
+here&mdash;<i>now</i>, see how well the colours come out in the sun!'</p>
+
+<p>If only they <i>would</i> come out! But what could she do but stand and
+admire hypocritically? Her eyes, in spite of herself, seemed drawn to
+that bright-hued sham intersected by black lines intended to represent
+leading; of the room itself she only saw vaguely that it was not
+unworthy of the window.</p>
+
+<p>'Nothing to what they've done with the drawing-room!' said innocent
+George, beaming; 'come along, darling, you'll scarcely know the place.'</p>
+
+<p>And Ella, reduced to a condition of stony stupor, followed to the
+drawing-room. She did not know the place, indeed. It was a
+quaintly-shaped, irregular room, with French windows opening upon the
+garden on one side and a deep bow-window on another; when she had last
+seen it, the walls were covered with a paper so pleasing in tone and
+design that she had almost decided to retain it. That paper was gone,
+and in its place a gaudy semi-Chinese pattern of unknown birds, flying
+and perching on sprawling<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[Pg 90]</a></span> branches laden with impossible flowers. And
+then the furniture&mdash;the 'elegant drawing-room suite' in brilliant plush
+and shiny satin, the cheap cabinets, and the ready-made black and gilt
+overmantel, with its panels of swans, hawthorn-blossom, and landscapes
+sketchily daubed on dead gold&mdash;surely it had all been transferred bodily
+from the stage of some carelessly mounted farcical comedy!</p>
+
+<p>Ella's horrified gaze gradually took in other features&mdash;the china
+monkeys swinging on cords, the porcelain parrots hanging in great brass
+rings, huge misshapen terra-cotta jars and pots, dead grass in bloated
+drain-pipes, tambourines, beribboned and painted with kittens and
+robins, enormous wooden <i>sabots</i>, gilded Japanese fans, a woolly white
+rug and a bright Kidderminster carpet.</p>
+
+<p>'<i>Oh</i>, George!' burst involuntarily from her lips.</p>
+
+<p>'I knew you'd be pleased!' he said complacently; 'but I mustn't take all
+the credit myself. It was like this, you see: I felt all right enough
+about the other rooms, but the drawing-room&mdash;that's <i>your</i> room, and I
+was awfully afraid of not having it exactly as it ought to be. So I went
+to the girls, and I said, "<i>You</i> know all about these things&mdash;just make
+it what you think Ella will like, and then we can't go wrong!" We had
+that Grosvenor Gallery paper down first of all. "Choose something bright
+and cheerful," I said, and I don't think they've chosen badly. Then the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[Pg 91]</a></span>
+pottery and china and all that&mdash;those are the girls' presents to <i>you</i>,
+with their best love.'</p>
+
+<p>'It&mdash;it's very good of them,' said poor Ella, on the verge of tears.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, they think a lot of you! They were rather nervous about doing
+anything at first, for fear you mightn't like it; but I told them they
+needn't be afraid. "What I like, Ella will like," I said; and, I must
+say, no one could wish to see a prettier drawing-room than they've
+turned it into&mdash;they've a good deal of taste, those two girls.'</p>
+
+<p>Ella stood there in a kind of dreary dream. What had happened to the
+world since she came into this house? What was this change in her? She
+was afraid to speak, lest the intense rebellious anger she felt should
+gain the mastery. Was it she that had these wicked thoughts of
+George&mdash;poor, kind, unsuspecting, loving George? She felt a little
+faint, for the windows were closed and the room stuffy with the odour of
+the new furniture and the atmosphere of the workshop; everything here
+seemed to her commonplace and repulsive.</p>
+
+<p>'How about those plans of yours now, Ella, eh?' cried George.</p>
+
+<p>This was too much; her overtried patience broke down. 'George!' she
+cried impulsively, and her voice sounded hoarse and strange to her own
+ear; 'George! I must speak&mdash;I must tell you!&mdash;&mdash;' and then she checked
+herself. She must keep command of herself, or<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[Pg 92]</a></span> she could not, without
+utter loss of dignity, find the words that were to sting him into a
+sense of what he had done and allowed to be done. Before she could go
+on, George had drawn her to him, and was patting her shoulder tenderly.
+'I know, dear little girl,' he said, 'I know; don't try to tell me
+anything. I'm so awfully glad you're pleased; but all the money and
+pains in the world wouldn't make the place good enough for my Ella!'</p>
+
+<p>She released herself with a little cry of impotent despair. How could
+she say the sharp, cruel speeches that were struggling to reach her
+tongue now? It was no use; she was a coward; she simply had not the
+courage to undeceive him here, on the very first day of their reunion,
+too!</p>
+
+<p>'You haven't been upstairs yet,' said George, dropping sentiment
+abruptly; 'shall we go up?'</p>
+
+<p>Ella assented submissively, much as even this cost her; but it was
+better, she reflected, to get it over and know the very worst. However,
+she was spared this ordeal for the present; as they returned to the
+hall, they found themselves suddenly face to face with a dingy man,
+whose face was surrounded by a fringe of black whiskers and crowned by a
+shock of fleecy hair.</p>
+
+<p>'Who on earth are you?' demanded George, as the man rose from the
+kitchen-stairs.</p>
+
+<p>'No offence, sir and lady! Peagrum, that's <i>my</i> name, fust shop round
+the corner as you go into<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[Pg 93]</a></span> Silver Street, plumber and sanitry hengineer,
+gas-fittin' and hartistic decorating, bell-'anging in all its branches.
+I received instructions from Mr. Jones that I was to look into a little
+matter o' leakage in the back-kitchen sink; also to see what taps, if
+hany, required seein' to, and gen'ally to put things straight like. So I
+come round, 'aving the keys, jest to cast a heye over them, as I may
+term it, preliminry to commencing work in the course of a week or so, as
+soon as I'm at libity to attend to it pussonally.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, the landlord sent you? All right, then.'</p>
+
+<p>'Correct, sir,' said the plumber affably. 'While I've been 'ere, I took
+the freedom of going all over this little 'ouse, and a nice cosy little
+'ouse you've made of it, for such a nouse as it is! You've done it up
+very tysty&mdash;very tysty you've done this little 'ouse up; and I've some
+claim to speak, seein' as how I've had the decoration throughout of a
+many 'ouses in my time, likewise mansions. You ain't been too ambitious,
+which is the error most parties falls into with small 'ouses. Now the
+parties as 'ad the place before you&mdash;by the name o' Rummles&mdash;well, I
+daresay they satisfied theirselves, but the 'ouse never looked
+right&mdash;not to <i>my</i> taste, it didn't!'</p>
+
+<p>'George, get rid of this person!' said Ella rapidly, under her breath,
+in French. Unfortunately, George's acquaintance with that tongue was
+about on a par with the plumber's, and he remained passive.</p>
+
+<p>The plumber now proceeded to put down his<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[Pg 94]</a></span> mechanic's straw-bag upon the
+hall-table, which he did with great care, as if it were of priceless
+stuff and contained fragile articles; having done this, he posed himself
+with one elbow resting on the post at the foot of the staircase, like a
+grimy statue of Shakespeare.</p>
+
+<p>'Ah,' he said, shaking his touzled head, 'this ain't the fust time I've
+been 'ere in my puffessional capacity, not by a long way. Not by a long
+way, it ain't. Mr. Rummles, him as I mentioned to you afore, and a nice
+pleasant-spoken gentleman he was, too&mdash;in the tea trade&mdash;Mr. Rummles, he
+allus sent round for me whenever there was hany odd jobs as wanted
+doin', and in course I was allus pleased to get 'em, be they hodd or
+hotherwise.'</p>
+
+<p>'Er-exactly,' said George, as soon as he could put in a word; 'but you
+see, this lady and I&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>The plumber, however, did not abandon his position, and seemed
+determined that they should hear him:</p>
+
+<p>'I know, sir&mdash;I see how things were with you with 'arf a glance; but
+afore we go any further, it's right you should know 'oo I am and all
+about me. Jest 'ear what I'm goin' to tell you, for it's somethink out
+of the common way, though gospel-truth. It's a melinkly reflection for a
+man in my station of life, but'&mdash;and here he lowered his voice to a
+solemn pitch&mdash;'I've never set foot inside of this 'ere 'ouse without
+somethink 'appens more or less immejit. Ah, it's true, though. Seems
+almost like as if I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[Pg 95]</a></span> brought a fatality in along o' me. Don't you
+interrupt; you wait till I'm done, and see if I'm talking at random or
+without facks to support me. Well, <i>fust</i> time as ever I was sent for
+'ere was in regard to drains, as they couldn't flush satisfactory. I did
+my work and come away. Not three weeks arter, Miss Rummles, the heldest
+gell, was took ill with typhoid. Never the same young lady again&mdash;nor
+yet she never won't be neither, not if she lives to a nundered. "Nothing
+very hodd about <i>that</i>?" says you. Wait a bit. Next time, it was the
+kitching copper as had got all furred up like. I tinkered that up to
+rights, and come away. Well, afore I'd even made out my account, that
+identical copper blew up and scalded the cook dreadful! "Coppers will
+play these games," you sez. All right, then; but you let me finish.
+Third time there was a flaw in one of the gas-brackets in the spare
+room. I soddered it up and I come away. Soon arterwards, a day or two as
+it might be, Mrs. Rummles 'ad 'er mar a-stayin' with her, and the old
+lady slep in that very room, and was laid up weeks! "Curus," says I,
+when I come to 'ear of it, "<i>very</i> curus!" and it set me a-thinkin'.
+Last time but one&mdash;'ere, lemme see&mdash;that was a bell-'anging job, I
+<i>think</i>&mdash;no, I'm wrong, it was drains agen, so it were&mdash;drains it was
+agen. And the <i>next</i> thing I 'eard was that Mrs. Rummles was a-layin' at
+death's door with the diffthery! The last time&mdash;ah, I recklect well, I
+was called in to see if somethink wasn't wrong with<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[Pg 96]</a></span> the ballcock in the
+top cistin. I see there <i>was</i> somethink, and I come away as usual. That
+day week, old Mr. Rummles was took with a fit on the floor in the back
+droring-room, which broke up the 'ouse!</p>
+
+<p>'Now, I think, as fair-minded and unprejudiced parties, you'll agree
+with me that there was something more'n hordinary coinside-ency in all
+that. I declare to you!' avowed the plumber, with a gloomy relish and a
+candour that was possibly begotten of beer, 'I declare to you there's
+times when I do honestly believe as I carry a curse along with me
+whenever I visits this 'ere partickler 'ouse! and, though it's agen my
+own hinterests, I deem it on'y my dooty, as a honest man, to mention
+it!'</p>
+
+<p>Under any other circumstances, the plumber's compliments on her taste
+and his lugubrious assumption of character of the Destroying Angel would
+have sorely tried, if not completely upset, Ella's gravity; as it was,
+she was too wretched to have more than a passing and quite
+unappreciative sense of his absurdity. George, having the quality of
+mind which makes jokes more readily than sees them, took him quite
+seriously.</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' he answered solemnly, 'I hope you won't bring <i>us</i> bad luck, at
+all events!'</p>
+
+<p>'<i>I</i> 'ope so, sir, I'm sure. I <i>'ope</i> so. It will not be by any desire
+on my part, more partickler when you're just settin' up 'ousekeepin'
+with your good lady 'ere. But there's no tellin' in these matters.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[Pg 97]</a></span>
+That's where it is, you see&mdash;there's no tellin'. And, arter all my
+experence, with the best intentions in the world, I can't go and
+guarantee to you as nothink won't come of it. I wish I could, but, as a
+honest man, I can't. If it's to be,' moralised this fatalistic plumber,
+'it <i>is</i> to be, and that's all about it, and no hefforts on my part or
+yours won't make hany difference, will they, sir?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, well,' said George, plainly ill at ease, 'that will do, my
+friend. Now, Ella, what do you say&mdash;shall we go upstairs?'</p>
+
+<p>'Not now,' she gasped, 'let us go away&mdash;. Oh, George, take me outside,
+please!'</p>
+
+<p>'Dash that confounded fool of a plumber!' said George, irritably, when
+they were in the street again; 'wonder if he thinks I'm going to employ
+him after that! Not that it isn't all bosh, of course&mdash;&mdash; Why, Ella,
+you're not tired, are you?'</p>
+
+<p>'I&mdash;I think I am a little&mdash;do you mind if we drive home?'</p>
+
+<p>Ella was very silent during their short drive. When they reached Linden
+Gardens she said, 'I think we must say good-bye here, George. I feel as
+if I were going to have a headache.'</p>
+
+<p>'You poor little girl!' he said, looking rather crestfallen, for he had
+been counting upon going in and being invited to remain for dinner,
+'it's been rather too much for you, going over the house and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[Pg 98]</a></span> all
+that&mdash;or was it that beastly plumber with his rigmaroles?'</p>
+
+<p>'It wasn't the plumber,' she said hurriedly, as the door was opened,
+'and&mdash;good-bye, George.'</p>
+
+<p>'How easily girls do get knocked up!' thought George, as he walked
+homeward, 'a little pleasant excitement like this and she seems quite
+upset. She was delighted with the house, though, that's one blessing,
+and I mustn't forget to tell the girls how touched she was by their
+presents. What a darling she is, and how happy we shall be together!'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3><a name="PART11" id="PART11"></a>PART II</h3>
+
+<p>Once safely at home, Ella hastened upstairs to her own room, where, if
+the truth must be told, she employed the half-hour before dinner in
+unintermittent sobbing, into which temper largely entered. 'He has
+spoilt it all for me! How <i>could</i> he&mdash;oh, how could he?' ran the burden
+of her moan. At the dinner-table, though pale and silent, she had
+recovered composure.</p>
+
+<p>'A pleasant walk, Ella?' inquired her mother, with rather formal
+interest.</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, very,' replied Ella, trusting she would not be questioned further.</p>
+
+<p>'I believe I know where you went!' cried indiscreet Flossie. 'You went
+to look at your new<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[Pg 99]</a></span> home&mdash;now, <i>didn't</i> you? Ah, I thought so! I
+suppose you have quite made up your minds how you mean to do the rooms?'</p>
+
+<p>'Quite.'</p>
+
+<p>'We might go round to all the best places to-morrow,' said Mrs. Hylton,
+'and see some papers and hangings&mdash;there were some lovely patterns in
+Blank's windows the other day.'</p>
+
+<p>'And, Ella,' added Flossie, 'I've been out with Andrews after school
+several times, to Tottenham Court Road, and Wardour Street, and Oxford
+Street&mdash;oh, everywhere, hunting up old furniture, and I can show you
+where they have some beautiful things&mdash;not shams, but really good!'</p>
+
+<p>'You know, Ella,' said Mrs. Hylton, observing that she did not answer,
+'I want you to have a pretty house, and you and George must order
+exactly what you like; but I think you will find I may be some help to
+you in choosing.'</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you, mother,' said Ella, without any animation; 'I&mdash;I don't think
+we shall want much.'</p>
+
+<p>'You will want all that young people in your position do want, I
+suppose,' said Mrs. Hylton, a little impatiently; 'and of course you
+understand that the bills are to be my affair.'</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you, mother,' murmured Ella again. She didn't feel able to tell
+them just yet how this had all been forestalled; she felt that she would
+infallibly break down if she tried.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[Pg 100]</a></span></p><p>'You seem a little overdone to-night, my dear,' said her mother
+frigidly; she was naturally hurt at the very uneffusive way in which her
+good offices had been met.</p>
+
+<p>'I have such a dreadful headache,' pleaded Ella. 'I&mdash;I think I overtired
+myself this afternoon.'</p>
+
+<p>'Then you were very foolish, after travelling all yesterday, as you did.
+I don't wonder that George was ashamed to come in. You had better go to
+bed early, and I will send Andrews in to you with some of my sleeping
+mixture.'</p>
+
+<p>Ella was glad enough to obey, though the draught took some time to
+operate; she felt as if no happiness or peace of mind were possible for
+her till George had been persuaded to undo his work.</p>
+
+<p>Surely he could not refuse when he knew that her mother was prepared to
+do everything for them at her own expense!</p>
+
+<p>And here it began to dawn upon her what this would entail! George's
+words came back to her as if she heard them actually spoken. Did he not
+say that the house had been furnished out of his savings?</p>
+
+<p>What was she asking him to do? To dismantle it entirely; to humiliate
+himself by going round to all the people he had dealt with, asking them
+as a favour to take back their goods, or else he must sell them as best
+he could for a fraction of their cost. Who was to refund him all he had
+so uselessly spent? Could she<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[Pg 101]</a></span> ask her mother to do so? Would he even
+consent to such an arrangement if it was proposed?</p>
+
+<p>Then his sisters&mdash;how could she avoid offending them irreparably,
+perhaps involving George in a quarrel with his family, if she were to
+carry her point?</p>
+
+<p>As she realised, for the first time, the inevitable consequences of
+success, she asked herself in despair what she ought to do&mdash;where her
+plain duty lay?</p>
+
+<p>Did she love George&mdash;or was it all delusion, and was he less to her than
+mere superfluities, the fringe of life?</p>
+
+<p>She did love him, in spite of any passing disloyalty of thought. She
+felt his sterling worth and goodness, even his weaknesses had something
+lovable in them for her.</p>
+
+<p>And he had been planning, spending, working all this time to give her
+pleasure, and this was his reward! She had been within an ace of letting
+him see the cruel ingratitude that was in her heart! 'What a selfish
+wretch I have been!' she thought; 'but I won't be&mdash;no, I won't! George
+shall <i>not</i> be snubbed, hurt, estranged from his family on my account!'</p>
+
+<p>No, she would suffer&mdash;she alone&mdash;and in silence. Never by a word would
+she betray to him the pain his well-intentioned action cost her. Not
+even to her mother and Flossie would she permit herself to utter<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[Pg 102]</a></span> the
+least complaint, lest they should insist upon opening George's eyes!</p>
+
+<p>So, having arrived at this heroic resolve, in which she found a touch of
+the sublime that almost consoled her, the tears dried on her cheeks and
+Ella fell asleep at last.</p>
+
+<p>Some readers, no doubt&mdash;though possibly few of our heroine's sex&mdash;will
+smile scornfully at this crumpled rose-leaf agony, this tempest in a
+Dresden teacup; and the writer is not concerned to deny that the
+situation has its ludicrous side.</p>
+
+<p>But, for a girl brought up as Ella Hylton had been, in an artistic
+<i>milieu</i>, her eye insensibly trained to love all that was beautiful in
+colour and form, to be almost morbidly sensitive to ugliness and
+vulgarity&mdash;it was a very real and bitter struggle, a hard-won victory to
+come to such a decision as she formed. Life, Heaven knows, contains
+worse trials and deeper tragedies than this; but at least Ella's happy
+life had as yet known no harder.</p>
+
+<p>And, so far, she must be given the credit of having conquered.</p>
+
+<p>Resolution is, no doubt, half the battle. Unfortunately, Ella's
+resolution, though she hardly perceived this at present, could not be
+effected by one isolated and final act, but by a long chain of daily and
+hourly forbearances, the first break in which would undo all that had
+gone before.</p>
+
+<p>How she bore the test we are going to see.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[Pg 103]</a></span></p><p>She woke the next morning to a sense that her life had somehow lost its
+savour; the exaltation of her resolve overnight had gone off and left
+her spirits flat and dead; but she came down, nevertheless, determined
+to be staunch and true to George under all provocations.</p>
+
+<p>'Have you and George decided when you would like your wedding to be?'
+asked her mother, after breakfast, 'because we ought to have the
+invitations printed very soon.'</p>
+
+<p>'Not yet,' faltered Ella, and the words might have passed either as an
+answer or an appeal.</p>
+
+<p>'I think it should be some time before the end of next month, or people
+will be going out of town.'</p>
+
+<p>'I suppose so,' was the reply, so listlessly given that Mrs. Hylton
+glanced keenly at her daughter.</p>
+
+<p>'What do you feel about it yourself, Ella?'</p>
+
+<p>'I? oh, I&mdash;I've no feeling. Perhaps, if we waited&mdash;no, it doesn't
+matter&mdash;let it be when you and George wish, mother, please!'</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Hylton gave a sharp, annoyed little laugh: 'Really, my dear, if you
+can't get up any more interest in it than that, I think it would
+certainly be wiser to wait!'</p>
+
+<p>It was more than indifference that Ella felt&mdash;a wild aversion to
+beginning the new life that but lately had seemed so mysteriously sweet
+and strange; she was frightened by it, ashamed of it, but she could not
+help herself. She made no answer, nor did Mrs. Hylton again refer to the
+subject.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[Pg 104]</a></span></p><p>But Ella's worst tribulations had yet to come. That afternoon, as she
+and her mother and Flossie were sitting in the drawing-room, 'Mrs. and
+the Miss Chapmans' were announced. Evidently they had deemed it
+incumbent on them to pay a state visit as soon as possible after Ella's
+return.</p>
+
+<p>Ella returned their effusive greetings as dutifully as she could. She
+had never succeeded in cultivating a very lively affection for them;
+to-day she found them barely endurable.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Chapman was a stout, dewlapped old lady, with dull eyes and
+pachydermatous folds in her face. She had a husky voice and a funereal
+manner. Jessie, her eldest daughter, was not altogether uncomely in a
+commonplace way: she was dark-haired, high-coloured,
+loud-voiced&mdash;generally sprightly and voluble and overpowering; she was
+in such a hurry to speak that her words tripped one another up, and she
+had a meaningless and, to Ella, highly irritating little laugh.</p>
+
+<p>Carrie was plain and colourless, content to admire and echo her sister.</p>
+
+<p>After some conversation on Ella's Continental experiences, Jessie
+suddenly, as Ella's uneasy instinct foresaw, turned to Mrs. Hylton. 'Of
+course, Ella told you what a surprise she had at Campden Hill yesterday?
+Weren't you electrified?'</p>
+
+<p>'No doubt I should have been,' said Mrs. Hylton,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[Pg 105]</a></span> who detested Jessie,
+'only Ella did not think fit to mention it.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I wonder at that! I hope I wasn't going to betray the secrets of
+the prison-house?' Jessie was fond of using stock phrases to give
+lightness and sparkle to her conversation. 'Ella, the idea of your
+keeping it all to yourself, you sly puss! But tell me&mdash;would you ever
+have believed Tumps'&mdash;his sisters called George 'Tumps'&mdash;'could be
+capable of such independent behaviour?'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' said Ella, 'I&mdash;indeed I never should!'</p>
+
+<p>'Ha, ha! nor should we! You would have screamed to see him fussing
+about&mdash;wasn't he killing over it, Carrie?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, he was, Jessie!'</p>
+
+<p>'My son,' explained Mrs. Chapman to Mrs. Hylton, 'is so wonderfully
+energetic and practical. I have never known him fail to carry through
+anything he has once undertaken&mdash;he inherits that from his poor dear
+father.'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't quite gather what your brother George has been doing, even
+now?' said Mrs. Hylton to Jessie.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, but my lips are sealed. Wild horses sha'n't drag any more from me!
+Don't be afraid, Ella, I won't spoil sport!'</p>
+
+<p>'There is no sport to spoil,' said Ella. 'Mother, it is only that&mdash;that
+George has furnished the house while I have been away.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[Pg 106]</a></span></p><p>'Really?' said Mrs. Hylton politely; 'that <i>is</i> energetic of him,
+indeed!'</p>
+
+<p>'Poor dear Tumps came home so proud of your approval,' said Jessie to
+Ella, 'and we were awfully relieved to find you didn't think we'd made
+the house quite too dreadful&mdash;weren't we, Carrie?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, indeed, Jessie.'</p>
+
+<p>'Of course,' observed the latter young lady, 'it's always so hard to hit
+upon another person's taste exactly&mdash;especially in furnishing.'</p>
+
+<p>'Impossible, I should have thought,' from Mrs. Hylton.</p>
+
+<p>'I hope Ella is of a different opinion&mdash;what do <i>you</i> say, dearest?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh,' cried Ella hastily, with splendid mendacity, 'I&mdash;I liked it all
+very much, and&mdash;and it was so much too kind of you and Carrie. I've
+never thanked you for&mdash;for all the things you gave me!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, <i>those</i>! they ain't worth thanking for&mdash;just a few little artistic
+odds and ends. They set off a room, you know&mdash;give it a finish.'</p>
+
+<p>'Young people nowadays,' croaked old Mrs. Chapman lugubriously in Mrs.
+Hylton's courteously inclined ear, 'think so much of luxury and
+ornament. I'm sure when I married my dear husband, we&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'Now, mater dear, you really <i>mustn't</i>!' interrupted the irrepressible
+Jessie; 'Mrs. Hylton is on <i>our</i> side, you know. She likes pretty things
+about her&mdash;don't you, Mrs. Hylton? And, talking of that, Ella,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[Pg 107]</a></span> I hope
+you thought our glyco-vitrine decoration a success? We were perfectly
+surprised ourselves to see how well it came out! Just transparent
+coloured paper, Mrs. Hylton, and you cut it into sheets, and gum it on
+the window-panes, and really, unless you were told or came quite close,
+you would declare it was real stained glass! You ought to try some of it
+on your windows, Mrs. Hylton. I'll tell you where you can get it&mdash;you go
+down&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'I'm afraid I'm old-fashioned, my dear,' said Mrs. Hylton, stiffly; 'if
+I cannot have the reality, I prefer to do without even the best
+imitations.'</p>
+
+<p>'Why, you're deserting us, I declare! Ella, you must take her to see the
+window, and then perhaps she will change her opinion.'</p>
+
+<p>'I always tell my girls,' said Mrs. Chapman, in her woolly voice, 'when
+I am dead and gone they can make any alterations they please, but while
+I am spared to them I like everything about the house to be kept exactly
+as it was in their poor father's lifetime.'</p>
+
+<p>'<i>Isn't</i> she a dear conservative old mummy?' said Jessie to Ella in an
+audible aside. 'Why, I do believe she won't see anything to admire in
+your little house&mdash;at least, if she does, the dear old lady, she'd
+sooner die than admit it!'</p>
+
+<p>The Chapmans went at last, and before they were out of the house Mrs.
+Hylton, with an effort to seem unconcerned, said: 'And so, Ella, you and
+George<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[Pg 108]</a></span> have done without my help? Of course you know your own affairs
+best; still, I should have thought&mdash;I should certainly have
+thought&mdash;that I might have been of some assistance to you&mdash;if only in
+pecuniary matters.'</p>
+
+<p>'George preferred that you should not be troubled,' stammered Ella.</p>
+
+<p>'I am not blaming him. I respect him for wishing to be independent. I
+own to being a little surprised that you should not have told me of this
+before, though, Ella. But for that chattering girl, I presume I should
+have been left to discover it for myself. I wonder you cannot bring
+yourself to be a little more open with your mother, my dear.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, mother!' cried Ella in despair, 'indeed I was going to tell
+you&mdash;only, I did not know myself till yesterday. At least, that is&mdash;&mdash;'
+she broke off lamely, fearing to reflect on George.</p>
+
+<p>'I find it hard to believe that George would act without consulting you
+in any way. It is strange enough that he should have undertaken to
+furnish the house in your absence.'</p>
+
+<p>'But if I couldn't be there!' pleaded Ella&mdash;'and I couldn't.'</p>
+
+<p>'Naturally, as you were on the Continent, you couldn't be on Campden
+Hill at the same time; you need not be absurd, Ella. But what I want to
+know is this&mdash;have you had a voice in the matter, or have you not?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[Pg 109]</a></span></p><p>'N&mdash;not much,' confessed Ella, hanging her head.</p>
+
+<p>'So I suspected, and I think George ought to be ashamed of himself. I
+never heard of such a thing, and I shall make a point of seeing the
+house and satisfying myself that it is fit for a daughter of mine to
+inhabit.'</p>
+
+<p>'Mother!' exclaimed Ella, springing up excitedly, 'you don't understand.
+Why should you choose to suppose that the house is not pretty? It is not
+done as <i>you</i> would do it, because poor George hadn't much money to
+spend; but if I am satisfied, why should you come between us? And I <i>am</i>
+satisfied&mdash;quite, quite satisfied; he has done it all beautifully, and I
+will not have a single thing altered! After all, it is <i>his</i> house&mdash;our
+house&mdash;and nobody else has any right to interfere&mdash;not even you,
+mother!'</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Hylton shrugged her shoulders. 'Oh, my dear, if that is the way you
+think proper to speak to me, it is time to change the subject. Pray
+understand that I shall not dream of interfering. I am very glad that
+you are so satisfied.' And by-and-by she left the room majestically.</p>
+
+<p>When she had gone, Flossie, who had been listening open-eyed to all that
+had taken place, came and stood in front of Ella's chair.</p>
+
+<p>'Ella, tell me,' she said, 'has George really furnished the house
+exactly as you like&mdash;<i>really</i> now?'</p>
+
+<p>'Haven't I said so, Flossie? Why should you doubt it?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[Pg 110]</a></span></p><p>'Oh, I don't know; I was wondering, that was all!'</p>
+
+<p>'Really!' cried Ella angrily, 'anyone would think poor George was a sort
+of barbarian, who couldn't be expected to know anything, or trusted to
+do anything!'</p>
+
+<p>'I'm sure I never <i>said</i> so, Ella. But how clever of him to choose just
+the right things! And, Ella, do all the colours and things go well
+together? I always thought most men didn't notice much about all that.
+And are the new mantelpieces pretty? Oh, and where did he go for the
+papers and the carpets?'</p>
+
+<p>'Flossie, I wish you wouldn't tease so. Can't you see I have a headache?
+I can't answer so many questions, and I won't! Once for all, everything
+is just what I like. Do you understand, or shall I tell you
+again?&mdash;just, <i>just</i> what I like!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, all right,' returned Flossie, with exasperating good-humour; 'then
+there's nothing to lose your temper about, darling, is there?'</p>
+
+<p>And this was all that Ella had gained by her loyalty to George so far.</p>
+
+<p>It was the morning after the Chapmans' visit. Ella had seen her mother
+and Flossie preparing to go out, but, owing to the friction between
+them, they neither invited her to accompany them, nor did she venture to
+ask where they were going. At luncheon, however, the unhappy girl
+divined from the expression of their faces how they had employed the
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[Pg 111]</a></span>forenoon. They had been inspecting the Campden Hill house! Her mother's
+handsome face wore a look of frozen contempt. Imagine a strict Quaker's
+feelings on seeing his son with a pair of black eyes&mdash;a Socialist's at
+finding a peerage under his daughter's pillow&mdash;a Positivist's whose
+children have all joined the Salvation Army, and even then but a faint
+idea will be reached of Mrs. Hylton's utter dismay and disgust.</p>
+
+<p>Flossie, though angry, took a different view of Ella's share in the
+business; she knew her better than her mother did, and consequently
+refused to believe that she was a Philistine at heart. It was her absurd
+infatuation for George that made her see with his eyes and bow down
+before the hideous household gods he had chosen to erect. On such
+weakness Flossie had no mercy.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, Ella, dear,' she began, 'mother and I have seen your house.
+George has quite surpassed our wildest expectations. Accept my
+compliments!'</p>
+
+<p>'Flossie,' said her mother severely, 'will you kindly choose some other
+topic? I really feel too seriously annoyed about all this to bear to
+hear it spoken of just yet. I think you shall come with me to the
+Amberleys' garden-party this afternoon, and not Ella, as we are dining
+out this evening. You had better stay at home and rest, Ella.'</p>
+
+<p>In this, and countless other ways, was Ella made to feel that she was in
+disgrace.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[Pg 112]</a></span></p><p>Nor did Flossie spare her sister when they were alone. 'Poor dear
+mother!' she said, 'I quite thought that house would have broken her
+heart&mdash;oh, I'm not saying a word against it, Ella, I know <i>you</i> like it,
+and I'm sure it looks very comfortable&mdash;everything so sensible and
+useful, and the kitchen really charming; mother and I liked it best of
+all the rooms. Such a horrid man let us in; he was at work there, and he
+would follow us all about, and tell mother his entire history. I don't
+think he <i>could</i> have been quite sober, he would insist on turning all
+the taps on everywhere. I suppose, Ella, it's ever so much <i>cheaper</i> to
+furnish as you and George have done; that's the worst of pretty things,
+they do cost such a lot! I'd no idea you were so practical, though,' and
+so on.</p>
+
+<p>On Sunday George came to luncheon. He was delighted to hear from Flossie
+that they had been to the house, and gave a boisterously high-spirited
+account of his labours. 'It <i>was</i> a grind,' he informed them, 'and, as
+for those painter-fellows, I began to think they'd stay out the entire
+lease.'</p>
+
+<p>'Art is long, George,' observed Flossie, wickedly.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh yes, I know; but they promised faithfully to be out in ten days, and
+they were over three weeks!'</p>
+
+<p>'But look at the result! George, how <i>did</i> you find out that Ella liked
+grained doors?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, to tell you the truth, Flossie, that was a bit of a fluke. The
+man told me that graining was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[Pg 113]</a></span> coming in again, and I said, "Grain 'em,
+then"&mdash;<i>I</i> didn't know!'</p>
+
+<p>In short, he was more provokingly dense than ever to-day, and Ella found
+herself growing more and more captious and irritable that afternoon; he
+could not understand why she was so disinclined to talk; even the dear
+little house of which she was so soon to be the mistress failed to
+interest her.</p>
+
+<p>'You have told me twice already that you got the drawing-room carpet a
+great bargain, and only paid four pounds ten for the table in the
+dining-room,' she broke out. 'Can't we take that for granted in future?'</p>
+
+<p>'I forgot I'd told you; I thought it was the mater,' he said; 'and I
+say, Ella, how about pictures? Jessie's promised to do us some
+water-colours&mdash;she's been taking lessons lately, you know&mdash;but we shall
+want one or two prints for the dining-room, shan't we? You can pick them
+up second-hand very cheap.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh yes, yes; anything you please, George!... No, no; I'm not cross, I'm
+only tired, especially of talking about the house. It is quite finished,
+you know, so what <i>is</i> there to discuss?'</p>
+
+<p>During the days that followed, Flossie devised an ingenious method of
+tormenting Ella; she laid out her pocket-money, of which she had a good
+deal, on the most preposterous ornaments&mdash;a pair of dangling cut-glass
+lustres, bead mats, a trophy of wax fruit under a glass shade, gaudy
+fire-screens and <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[Pg 114]</a></span>flowerpots, all of which she solemnly presented to her
+suffering sister. This was not pure mischief or unkindness on Flossie's
+side, but part of a treatment she had hit upon for curing Ella of her
+folly. And at last the worm turned. Flossie came in one day with a cheap
+plush and terra-cotta panel of appalling ugliness.</p>
+
+<p>'For the drawing-room, dear,' she observed blandly, and Ella suddenly
+burst into a flood of tears.</p>
+
+<p>'You are very, very unkind to me, Flossie!' she sobbed.</p>
+
+<p>'I!' exclaimed Flossie, in a tone of the most innocent surprise. 'Why,
+Ella, I thought you would be charmed with it. I'm sure <i>George</i> will.
+And, you know, it will go beautifully with the rest of your things!'</p>
+
+<p>'You might understand ... you might see&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'I might see what?'</p>
+
+<p>'How <i>frightfully</i> miserable I am!' said Ella, which was the very
+admission Miss Flossie had been seeking to provoke.</p>
+
+<p>'Suppose I <i>do</i> see,' she said; 'suppose I've been trying to get you to
+act sensibly, Ella?'</p>
+
+<p>'Then it's cruel of you!'</p>
+
+<p>'No it's not. It's kind. How am I to help you unless you speak out? I'm
+younger than you, Ella, but I know this&mdash;<i>I</i> would never mope and make
+myself miserable when a word would put everything right!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[Pg 115]</a></span></p><p>'But it wouldn't, Flossie; it is too late to speak now. I can't tell
+him how I really feel&mdash;I can't!'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, then you own there is something to tell?'</p>
+
+<p>'What have I said? Flossie, forget what I said; it slipped out. I meant
+nothing.'</p>
+
+<p>'And you are perfectly happy and satisfied, are you? <i>Now</i>, I know how
+people look when they are perfectly happy and satisfied.'</p>
+
+<p>'It's no use!' cried Ella, suddenly. 'I've tried, and tried, and tried
+to bear it, but I can't. I <i>must</i> tell somebody ... it is making me ill.
+I am getting cross and wicked, and unlike what I used to be. Flossie, I
+can't go and live there&mdash;I dread the thought of it; I shrink from it
+more and more every day! It is all odious, impossible&mdash;and yet I must, I
+must!'</p>
+
+<p>'No, you mustn't; and, what's more, you shan't!'</p>
+
+<p>'Flossie, you mean you will tell mother! You must not, do you hear? If
+you do, it will only make matters worse. Oh, why did I tell you?' cried
+Ella, in shame at this lapse from all her heroism. 'Promise me you will
+say nothing to mother&mdash;it is too late now&mdash;promise!'</p>
+
+<p>'Very well,' said Flossie reluctantly; 'then I promise. But, all the
+same, Ella, I think you're a great goose!'</p>
+
+<p>'I didn't promise I wouldn't say anything to <i>George</i>, though,' she
+reflected; and so, on the very next occasion that she caught him alone,
+she availed herself of an innocent allusion of his to Ella's low<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_116" id="Page_116">[Pg 116]</a></span>
+spirits to give him the benefit of her candid opinion, which was not
+tempered by any marked consideration for his feelings.</p>
+
+<p>Ella was in the morning-room alone&mdash;she had taken to sitting alone
+lately, brooding over her trials. She was no heroine, after all; her
+mind, it is to be feared, was far from superior. She was finding out
+that she had undertaken too heavy a task; she could not console herself
+for her lost dream of a charmingly appointed house. She might endure to
+live in such a home as George had made for her; but to be expected to
+admire it, to let it be understood that it was her handiwork, that she
+had chosen or approved of it&mdash;this was the burden that was crushing her.</p>
+
+<p>Suddenly the door opened and George stood before her. His expression was
+so altered that she scarcely recognised him; all the cheery buoyancy had
+vanished, and his stern, set face had a dignity and character in it now
+that were wanting before.</p>
+
+<p>'I have just had a talk with Flossie,' he began; 'she has shown me what
+a&mdash;what a mistake I've been making.'</p>
+
+<p>Ella could not help feeling a certain relief, though she said, 'It was
+very wrong of Flossie&mdash;she had no right to speak.'</p>
+
+<p>'She had every right,' he said. 'She might have done it more kindly,
+perhaps, but that's nothing. Why didn't you tell me yourself, Ella? You
+might have trusted me!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[Pg 117]</a></span></p><p>'I couldn't&mdash;it seemed so cruel, so ungrateful, after all you had done.
+I hoped you would never know.'</p>
+
+<p>'It's well for you, and for me too, that I know this while there's still
+time. Ella, I've been a blind, blundering fool. I never had a suspicion
+of this till&mdash;till just now, or you don't think I should have gone on
+with it a single minute. I came to tell you that you need not make
+yourself miserable any longer. I will put an end to this&mdash;whatever it
+costs me.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, George, I am so ashamed. I know it is weak and cowardly of me, but
+I can't help it. And&mdash;and will it cost you so very much?'</p>
+
+<p>'Quite as much as I can bear.'</p>
+
+<p>'No; but tell me&mdash;about <i>how</i> much? More than a hundred pounds?'</p>
+
+<p>'I haven't worked it out in pounds, shillings, and pence,' he said
+grimly; 'but I should put it higher myself.'</p>
+
+<p>'Won't they take back some of the things? They ought to,' she suggested
+timidly.</p>
+
+<p>'The things? Oh, the furniture! Good Heavens, Ella! do you suppose I
+care a straw about that? All I can think of is how I could have gone on
+deceiving myself like this, believing I knew your every thought; and all
+the time&mdash;pah, what a fool I've been!'</p>
+
+<p>'I thought I should get used to it,' she pleaded. 'And oh, you don't
+know how hard I have tried to bear it, not to let anyone see what I
+felt&mdash;you don't know!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[Pg 118]</a></span></p><p>'And I would rather not know,' he replied, 'for it's not exactly
+flattering, you see, Ella. And at all events, it's over now. This is the
+last time I shall trouble you; you will see no more of me after to-day.'</p>
+
+<p>Ella could only stare at him incredulously. Had he really taken the
+matter so seriously to heart as this? Could he not forgive the wound to
+his vanity? How hard, how utterly unworthy of him!</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' he continued, 'I see now we were quite unsuited to one another. I
+should never have made you happy, Ella; it's best to find it out before
+it's too late. So let us shake hands and say good-bye, my dear.'</p>
+
+<p>She felt powerless to appeal to him, and yet it was not wholly pride
+that tied her tongue; she was too shaken and stunned to make the least
+effort at remonstrance.</p>
+
+<p>'Then, if it must be,' she said at last, very low&mdash;'good-bye, George.'</p>
+
+<p>He crushed her hand in his strong grasp. 'Don't mind about me,' he said
+roughly. 'You've nothing to blame yourself for. I daresay I shall get
+over it all right. It's rather sudden at first&mdash;that's all!' And with
+that he was gone.</p>
+
+<p>Flossie, coming in a little later, found her sister sitting by the
+window, smiling in a strange, vacant way. '<i>Well?</i>' said Flossie
+eagerly, for she had been anxiously waiting to hear the result of the
+interview.</p>
+
+<p>'It's all over, Flossie; he has broken it off.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119">[Pg 119]</a></span></p><p>'Oh, Ella, I'm so glad! I <i>hoped</i> he would, but I wasn't sure. Well,
+you may thank me for delivering you, darling. If I hadn't spoken
+plainly&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'Tell me what you said.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, let me see. Well, I told him anybody else would have seen long ago
+that your feelings were altered. I said you were perfectly miserable at
+having to marry him, only you thought it was too late to say so. I told
+him he didn't understand you in the least, and you hadn't a single
+thought or taste in common. I said if he cared about you at all, the
+best way he could prove it was by setting you free, and not spoiling
+your life and his own too. I put it as pleasantly as I could,' said
+Flossie na&iuml;vely, 'but he is very trying!'</p>
+
+<p>'You told him all that! What made you invent such wicked, cruel lies?
+Flossie, it is you that have spoilt our lives, and I will never forgive
+you&mdash;never, as long as I live!'</p>
+
+<p>'Ella!' cried the younger sister, utterly astonished at this outburst.
+'Why, didn't you tell me the other day how miserable you were, and how
+you dared not speak about it? And now, when I&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'Go away, Flossie; you have done mischief enough!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, very well, I'm going&mdash;if this is all I get for helping you. Is it
+<i>my</i> fault if you don't know your own mind, and say what you don't mean?
+And if you really want your dearly beloved George back<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[Pg 120]</a></span> again, there's
+time yet; he hasn't gone&mdash;he's in the drawing-room with mother.'</p>
+
+<p>How infinitely petty her past misery seemed now! for what trifles she
+had thrown away George's honest heart! If only there was a chance still!
+at least false pride should not come between them any longer: so thought
+Ella on her way to the drawing-room. George was still there; as she
+turned the door-handle she heard her mother's clear resonant tones. 'Not
+that that is any excuse for Ella,' she was saying.</p>
+
+<p>Ella burst precipitately into the room. She was only just in time, for
+George had risen and was evidently on the point of leaving. 'George,'
+she exclaimed, panting after her rapid flight, 'I&mdash;I came to tell
+you&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'My dear Ella,' interrupted Mrs. Hylton, 'the kindest thing you can do
+for George now is to let him go without any more explanations.'</p>
+
+<p>Ella stopped; again her mind became a blank. What had she come for; what
+was it she felt she must say? While she hesitated, George was already at
+the other door; he seemed anxious to avoid hearing her; in another
+second he would be gone.</p>
+
+<p>She cried to him piteously. 'George, dear George, don't leave me!... I
+can't bear it!'</p>
+
+<p>'This is too ridiculous!' exclaimed her mother angrily. 'What is it that
+you <i>do</i> want, Ella?'</p>
+
+<p>'I want George,' she said simply. 'It was all a mistake, George. Flossie
+mistook&mdash;&mdash; Oh, you don't<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[Pg 121]</a></span> really think that I have left off caring for
+you? I haven't, dear, indeed I haven't&mdash;won't you believe me?'</p>
+
+<p>'I had better leave you to come to an understanding together,' said Mrs.
+Hylton, not in the best of tempers, for she had been more sorry for
+George than for the rupture he came to announce, and she swept out of
+the room with very perceptible annoyance.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>'I thought it was all up with me, Ella; I did indeed,' said George, a
+minute or two later, his face still pale after all this emotion. 'But
+tell me&mdash;what's wrong with the furniture I ordered?'</p>
+
+<p>'Nothing, dear, nothing,' she answered, blushing. 'Don't think about it
+any more.'</p>
+
+<p>'No? But your mother was talking about it too,' he insisted. 'Come,
+Ella, dear, for heaven's sake let us have no more misunderstandings! I
+see now what an ass I was not to wait and let you choose for yourself;
+these &aelig;sthetic things are not in my line. But I'd no idea you'd care so
+much!'</p>
+
+<p>'But I don't now&mdash;a bit.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, I do, then. And the house must be done all over again, and
+exactly as you would like it; so there's no more to be said about it,'
+said George, without a trace of pique or wounded vanity.</p>
+
+<p>'George, you are too good to me; I don't deserve it. And indeed you must
+not&mdash;think of the expense!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[Pg 122]</a></span></p><p>His face lengthened slightly; he knew well enough that the change would
+cost him dear.</p>
+
+<p>'I'll manage it somehow,' he declared stoutly.</p>
+
+<p>Would her mother help them now? thought Ella, and felt more than
+doubtful. No, in spite of her own wishes, she must not allow George to
+carry out his intentions.</p>
+
+<p>'But you forget Carrie and Jessie,' she said; 'we shall hurt their
+feelings so if we change now.'</p>
+
+<p>'By Jove! I forgot that,' he said. 'Yes, they won't like it&mdash;they meant
+well, poor girls, and took a lot of trouble. Still, you're the first
+person to be considered, Ella. I'll try and smooth it over with them,
+and if they choose to be offended, why, they must&mdash;that's all. And I
+tell you what. Suppose we go and see the house now, and you shall tell
+me just what wants doing to make it right?'</p>
+
+<p>She would have liked to decline this rather invidious office, especially
+as she felt no compromise to be possible; but he was so urgent that she
+finally agreed to go with him.</p>
+
+<p>As they gained Campden Hill and the road in which their house stood,
+George stopped. 'Hullo!' he said, 'that can't be the house&mdash;what's the
+matter with it?'</p>
+
+<p>Very soon it was pretty evident what had been the matter&mdash;the walls were
+scorched and streaming, the window sashes were empty, charred and wasted
+by fire, the door was blistered and blackened, a stalwart<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123">[Pg 123]</a></span> fireman in
+his undress cap, with his helmet slung at his back, was just opening the
+gate as they came up.</p>
+
+<p>'Can't come in, sir,' he said, civilly enough. 'No one admitted.'</p>
+
+<p>'Hang it!' exclaimed George, 'it's my own fire&mdash;I'm the tenant.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I beg your pardon, sir&mdash;it's been got under some hours now. I was
+just going off duty.'</p>
+
+<p>'Much damage done?' inquired George laconically.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you see, sir,' said the man, evidently considering how to prepare
+George for the worst, 'we didn't get the call till the house was well
+alight, and there was three steamers and a manual a-playing on it,
+so&mdash;well, you must expect things to be a bit untidy-like inside. But the
+walls and the roof ain't much damaged.'</p>
+
+<p>'And how did it happen?&mdash;the house isn't even occupied.'</p>
+
+<p>'Workmen,' said the man. 'Someone was in there early this morning and
+left the gas escaping somewheres, and as likely as not a light burning
+near&mdash;and here you are. Well, I'll be off, sir; there's nothing more to
+be done 'ere. Good-day, sir, and thank ye, I'm sure.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, George!' said Ella, half crying, 'our poor, poor little house! It
+seems like a judgment on me. How <i>can</i> you laugh! Who will build it up
+for us now?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[Pg 124]</a></span></p><p>'Who? Why, the insurance people, to be sure! You see, the firm are
+agents for the "Curfew," and as soon as I got all the furniture in I
+insured the whole concern and got a protection note, so we're all right.
+Don't worry, little girl. Why, don't you see this gets us out of our
+difficulty? We can start afresh now without offending anybody. Look
+there; there's that idiot of a plumber who's done all the mischief&mdash;a
+nice funk he'll be in when he sees us!'</p>
+
+<p>But Mr. Peagrum was quite unperturbed; if anything, his smudgy features
+wore a look of sombre complacency as he came towards them. 'I'm sorry
+this should have occurred,' he said,'but you'll bear me out that I
+warned yer as something was bound to 'appen. In course I couldn't tell
+what form it might take, and fire I must say I did <i>not</i> expect. I
+'adn't on'y been in the place not a quarter of a hour, watering the
+gaselier in the libery&mdash;the libery as <i>was</i>, I <i>should</i> say&mdash;when it
+struck me I'd forgot my screw-driver, so, fortunately, as things turned
+out, I went 'ome to my place to get it, and I come back to see the place
+all in a blaze. It's fate, that's what it is&mdash;fate's at the bottom o'
+this 'ere job!'</p>
+
+<p>'Much more likely to be a lighted candle,' said George.</p>
+
+<p>'I was not on the premises at the time, so I can't say; but, be that 'ow
+it may, there's no denying it's a singler thing the way my words have
+been fulfilled almost literal.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[Pg 125]</a></span></p><p>'Confound you!' said George. 'You take good care your prophecies come
+off. Why, man, you're not going to pretend you don't know that it's your
+own carelessness that's brought this about! This isn't the only house
+you've brought bad luck into, Mr. What's-your-name, since you've started
+in business!'</p>
+
+<p>'You can't make me lose my temper,' replied the plumber with dignity. 'I
+put it down to ignirance.'</p>
+
+<p>'So do I,' said George. 'And if I know anyone who's anxious for a little
+typhoid, or wants his house burnt down at a moderate charge, why, I
+shall know whom to recommend. Good-day.'</p>
+
+<p>He turned on his heel and walked off, but Ella lingered behind. 'I only
+just wanted to tell you,' she said, addressing the astonished plumber,
+'that you have done us a very great service, and I, at least, am very
+much obliged to you.' And she fluttered away after her <i>fianc&eacute;</i>.</p>
+
+<p>The plumber&mdash;that instrument of Destiny&mdash;looked after the retreating
+couple, and indulged in a mystified whistle.</p>
+
+<p>'<i>'E</i> comes a bullyragging of me,' he observed to a lamp-post, 'and
+she's "very much obliged"! And I'm blowed if I know what for, either
+way! Cracked, poor young things, cracked, the pair on 'em&mdash;and no
+wonder, with such a calamity so recent. Ah, well, I do 'ope as this is
+the end on it. I 'ope I shan't be<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[Pg 126]</a></span> the means of bringing no more trouble
+into that little 'ouse&mdash;that I kin truly say!'</p>
+
+<p>And&mdash;human gratitude having its limits&mdash;it is highly probable that this
+pious aspiration will not be disappointed, so long, at least, as Mr. and
+Mrs. Chapman's tenancy continues.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[Pg 127]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="DON_THE_STORY_OF_A_GREEDY_DOG" id="DON_THE_STORY_OF_A_GREEDY_DOG"></a><i>DON; THE STORY OF A GREEDY DOG</i></h2>
+
+<h3>A TALE FOR CHILDREN</h3>
+
+<p>'Daisy, dearest,' said Miss Millikin anxiously to her niece one
+afternoon, 'do you think poor Don is quite the thing? He has seemed so
+very languid these last few days, and he is certainly losing his
+figure!'</p>
+
+<p>Daisy was absorbed in a rather ambitious attempt to sketch the lake from
+the open windows of Applethwaite Cottage, and did not look up from her
+drawing immediately. When she did speak her reply might perhaps have
+been more sympathetic. 'He <i>eats</i> such a lot, auntie!' she said. 'Yes,
+Don, we <i>are</i> talking about you. You know you eat too much, and that's
+the reason you're so disgracefully fat!'</p>
+
+<p>Don, who was lying on a rug under the verandah, wagged his tail with an
+uneasy protest, as if he disapproved (as indeed he did) of the very
+personal turn Daisy had given to the conversation. He had noticed
+himself that he was not as active as he used to be; he grew tired so
+very soon now when he chased birds (he was always possessed by a fixed
+idea that, if he only gave his whole mind to it, he could catch any<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[Pg 128]</a></span>
+swallow that flew at all fairly); he felt the heat considerably.</p>
+
+<p>Still, it was Don's opinion that, so long as he did not mind being fat
+himself, it was no business of any other person's&mdash;certainly not of
+Daisy's.</p>
+
+<p>'But, Daisy,' cried Miss Millikin plaintively, 'you don't really mean
+that I overfeed him?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' Daisy admitted, 'I think you give way to him rather, Aunt Sophy,
+I really do. I know that at home we never let Fop have anything between
+his meals. Jack says that unless a small dog is kept on very simple diet
+he'll soon get fat, and getting fat,' added Daisy portentously, 'means
+having fits sooner or later.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, my <i>dear</i>!' exclaimed her aunt, now seriously alarmed. 'What do you
+think I ought to do about it?'</p>
+
+<p>'I know what I would do if he was <i>my</i> dog,' said Daisy, with great
+decision&mdash;'diet him, and take no notice when he begs at table; I would.
+I'd begin this very afternoon.'</p>
+
+<p>'<i>After</i> tea, Daisy?' stipulated Miss Millikin.</p>
+
+<p>'No,' was the inflexible answer, '<i>at</i> tea. It's all for his own good.'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, dear, I'm sure you're right&mdash;but he has such pretty ways&mdash;I'm so
+afraid I shall forget.'</p>
+
+<p>'I'll remind you, Aunt Sophy. He shan't take advantage of you while
+<i>I'm</i> here.'</p>
+
+<p>'You're just a tiny bit hard on him, Daisy, aren't you?'</p>
+
+<p>'Hard on Don!' cried Daisy, catching him up and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129">[Pg 129]</a></span> holding him out at
+arm's length. 'Don, I'm <i>not</i> hard on you, am I? I love you, only I see
+your faults, and you know it. You're full of deceitfulness' (here she
+kissed him between the eyes and set him down). 'Aunt Sophy, you would
+never have found out his trick about the milk if it hadn't been for
+me&mdash;<i>would</i> you now?'</p>
+
+<p>'Perhaps not, my love,' agreed Miss Millikin mildly.</p>
+
+<p>The trick in question was a certain ingenious device of Don's for
+obtaining a double allowance of afternoon tea&mdash;a refreshment for which
+he had acquired a strong taste. The tea had once been too hot and burnt
+his tongue, and, as he howled with the pain, milk had been added. Ever
+since that occasion he had been in the habit of lapping up all but a
+spoonful or two of the tea in his saucer, and <i>then</i> uttering a pathetic
+little yelp; whereupon innocent Miss Millikin would as regularly fill up
+the saucer with milk again.</p>
+
+<p>But, unfortunately for Don, his mistress had invited her niece Daisy to
+spend part of her summer holidays at her pretty cottage in the Lake
+District, and Daisy's sharper eyes had detected this little stratagem
+about the milk on the very first evening!</p>
+
+<p>Daisy was fourteen, and I fancy I have noticed that when a girl is about
+this age, she not unfrequently has a tendency to be rather a severe
+disciplinarian when others than herself are concerned. At all events
+Daisy had very decided notions on the proper method<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[Pg 130]</a></span> of bringing up
+dogs, and children too; only there did not happen to be any children at
+Applethwaite Cottage to try experiments upon; and she was quite sure
+that Aunt Sophy allowed herself to be shamefully imposed upon by Don.</p>
+
+<p>There was perhaps some excuse for Miss Millikin, for Don was a
+particularly charming specimen of the Yorkshire terrier, with a silken
+coat of silver-blue, set off by a head and paws of the ruddiest gold.
+His manners were most insinuating, and his great eyes glowed at times
+under his long hair, as if a wistful, loving little soul were trying to
+speak through them. But, though it seems an unkind thing to say, it must
+be confessed that this same soul in Don's eyes was never quite so
+apparent as when he was begging for some peculiarly appetising morsel.
+He was really fond of his mistress, but at meal times I am afraid he
+'put it on' a little bit. Of course this was not quite straightforward;
+but then I am not holding him up as a model animal.</p>
+
+<p>How far he understood the conversation that has been given above is more
+than I can pretend to say, but from that afternoon he began to be aware
+of a very unsatisfactory alteration in his treatment.</p>
+
+<p>Don had sometimes felt a little out of temper with his mistress for
+being slow to understand exactly what he <i>did</i> want, and he had barked,
+almost sharply, to intimate to the best of his powers&mdash;'Not bread and
+butter, stoopid&mdash;<i>cake</i>!' So you may conceive his<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[Pg 131]</a></span> disgust when she did
+not even give him bread and butter; nothing but judicious
+advice&mdash;<i>without</i> jam. She was most apologetic, it is true, and
+explained amply why she could not indulge him as heretofore, but Don
+wanted sugar, and not sermons. Sometimes she nearly gave way, and then
+cruel Daisy would intercept the dainty under his very nose, which he
+thought most unfeeling.</p>
+
+<p>He had a sort of notion that it was all through Daisy that they were
+just as stingy and selfish in the kitchen, and that his meals were now
+so absurdly few and plain. It was very ungrateful of her, for he had
+gone out of his way to be polite and attentive to her. When he thought
+of her behaviour to him he felt strongly inclined to sulk, but somehow
+he did not actually go so far as that. He liked Daisy; she was pretty
+for one thing, and Don always preferred pretty people, and then she
+stroked him in a very superior and soothing manner. Besides this, he
+respected her: she had been intrusted with the duty of punishing him on
+more than one occasion, and <i>her</i> slaps really hurt, while it was
+hopeless to try to soften her heart by trying to lick the chastising
+hands&mdash;a man&oelig;uvre which was always effective with poor Miss Millikin.
+So he contented himself with letting her see that though he did not
+understand her conduct towards him, he was willing to overlook it for
+the present.</p>
+
+<p>'What a wonderful improvement in the dear dog!' Miss Millikin remarked
+one morning at breakfast,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_132" id="Page_132">[Pg 132]</a></span> after Don had been on short commons for a
+week or two. 'Really, Daisy, I begin to think you were quite right about
+him.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I'm <i>sure</i> I was,' said Daisy, who always had great confidence in
+her own judgment.</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' continued her aunt, 'and, now he's so much better&mdash;just this one
+small bit, Daisy?' Don's eyes already had a green glitter in them and
+his mouth was watering.</p>
+
+<p>'No, Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy, 'I wouldn't&mdash;really. He's better without
+anything.'</p>
+
+<p>'I wish that girl was gone!' reflected poor Don, as he went sulkily back
+to his basket. 'It's enough to make a dog steal, upon my tail it is! I'm
+positively starved&mdash;no bones, no chicken, only beastly dry dog-biscuits
+and milk twice a day! I wish I could rummage about in gutters and places
+as Jock does&mdash;but I don't think the things you find in gutters are ever
+<i>really</i> nice. Jock does&mdash;but he's just that low sort of dog who
+<i>would</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>Jock was a humble friend of his down in the village, a sort of distant
+relation to the Dandie Dinmonts; he was a rough, long-backed creature,
+as grey as a badger, and with a big solemn head like a hammer. Don was
+civil to him in a patronising way, but he did not tell him of the
+indignities he was subject to, perhaps because he had been rather given
+to boast of his influence over his mistress, and the high consideration
+he enjoyed at Applethwaite Cottage.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[Pg 133]</a></span></p><p>Now Daisy used to go up for solitary rambles on the fells sometimes,
+when she generally took Don as a protector. He was becoming very nearly
+as active as ever, and now there was a stronger motive than before for
+pursuing the swallows&mdash;for he had a notion that they would be rather
+good eating. But one morning she missed him on her way back through the
+village by the lake; she was sure he was with her on the pier, and she
+had only stopped to ask some question at the ticket-office about the
+steamboat times; and when she turned round, Don was gone.</p>
+
+<p>However, her aunt was neither angry nor alarmed. Miss Millikin was not
+able to walk as much as Don wished, she said, so he was accustomed to
+take a great deal of solitary exercise; he was such a remarkably
+intelligent dog that he could be trusted to take care of himself&mdash;oh, he
+would come back.</p>
+
+<p>And towards dusk that evening Don did come back. There was a curious air
+about him&mdash;subdued, almost sad; Daisy remembered long afterwards how
+unusually affectionate he had been, and how quietly he had lain on her
+lap till bedtime.</p>
+
+<p>The next morning, when her aunt and she prepared to go for a walk along
+the lake, Don's excitement was more marked than usual; he leaped up and
+tried to caress their hands: he assured them in a thousand ways of the
+delight he felt at being allowed to make one of the party.</p>
+
+<p>After this, it was a painful surprise to find that he<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[Pg 134]</a></span> gave them the
+slip the moment they reached the village. But Miss Millikin said he
+always did prefer mountain scenery, and no doubt it was tiresome for him
+to have to potter about as they did. And Master Don began to give them
+less and less of his society in the daytime, and to wander from morn to
+dewy eve in solitude and independence; though whether he went up
+mountains to admire the view, or visited ruins and waterfalls, or spent
+his days hunting rabbits, no one at Applethwaite Cottage could even
+pretend to guess.</p>
+
+<p>'<i>One</i> good thing, Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy complacently one evening, a
+little later, 'I've quite cured Don of being troublesome at meals!'</p>
+
+<p>'He couldn't be <i>troublesome</i> if he tried, dear,' said Miss Millikin
+with mild reproof; 'but I must say you have succeeded quite
+wonderfully&mdash;how <i>did</i> you do it?'</p>
+
+<p>'Why,' said Daisy, 'I spoke to him exactly as if he could understand
+every word, and I made him thoroughly see that he was only wasting his
+time by sitting up and begging for things. And you got to believe it at
+last, didn't you, dear?' she added to Don, who was lying stretched out
+on the rug.</p>
+
+<p>Don pricked the ear that was uppermost, and then uttered a heavy sigh,
+which smote his mistress to the heart.</p>
+
+<p>'Daisy,' she said, 'it's <i>no</i> use&mdash;I <i>must</i> give him something. Poor
+pet, he deserves it for being so good and patient all this time. One
+biscuit, Daisy?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[Pg 135]</a></span></p><p>Even Daisy relented: 'Well&mdash;a <i>very</i> plain one, then. Let me give it to
+him, auntie?'</p>
+
+<p>The biscuit was procured, and Daisy, with an express intimation that
+this was a very particular indulgence, tendered it to the deserving
+terrier.</p>
+
+<p>He half raised his head, sniffed at it&mdash;and then fell back again with
+another weary little sigh. Daisy felt rather crushed. 'I'm afraid he's
+cross with me,' she said; 'you try, Aunt Sophy.' Aunt Sophy tried, but
+with no better success, though Don wagged his tail feebly to express
+that he was not actuated by any personal feeling in the matter&mdash;he had
+no appetite, that was all.</p>
+
+<p>'Daisy,' said Miss Millikin, with something more like anger than she
+generally showed, 'I was very wrong to listen to you about the diet.
+It's perfectly plain to me that by checking Don's appetite as we have we
+have done him serious harm. You can see for yourself that he is past
+eating anything at all now. Cook told me to-day that he had scarcely
+touched his meals lately. And yet he's stouter than ever&mdash;<i>isn't</i> he?'</p>
+
+<p>Daisy was forced to allow that this was so. 'But what can it be?' she
+said.</p>
+
+<p>'It's <i>disease</i>,' said her aunt, very solemnly. 'I've read over and over
+again that corpulence has nothing whatever to do with the amount of food
+one eats. And, oh! Daisy, I don't want to blame you, dear&mdash;but I'm
+afraid we have been<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_136" id="Page_136">[Pg 136]</a></span> depriving him of the nourishing things he really
+needed to enable him to struggle against the complaint!'</p>
+
+<p>Poor Daisy was overcome by remorse as she knelt over the recumbent Don.
+'Oh, darling Don,' she said, 'I didn't mean it&mdash;you know I didn't, don't
+you? You must get well and forgive me! I tell you what, aunt,' she said
+as she rose to her feet, 'you know you said I might drive you over in
+the pony cart to that tennis-party at the Netherbys to-morrow. Well,
+young Mr. Netherby is rather a "doggy" sort of man, and nice too.
+Suppose we take Don with us and ask him to tell us plainly whether he
+has anything dreadful the matter with him?'</p>
+
+<p>Miss Millikin consented, though she did not pretend to hope much from
+Mr. Netherby's skill. 'I'm afraid,' she said, with a sigh, 'that only a
+very clever veterinary surgeon would find out what really is the matter
+with Don. But you can try, my dear.'</p>
+
+<p>The following afternoon Miss Millikin entrusted herself and Don to
+Daisy's driving, not without some nervous misgivings.</p>
+
+<p>'You're quite sure you can manage him, Daisy?' she said. 'If not, we can
+take John.'</p>
+
+<p>'Why, Aunt Sophy!' exclaimed Daisy, 'I <i>always</i> drive the children at
+home; and sometimes when I'm on the box with Toppin, he gives me the
+reins in a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_137" id="Page_137">[Pg 137]</a></span> straight part of the road, and Paul and Virginia pull like
+anything&mdash;Toppin says it's all <i>he</i> can do to hold them.'</p>
+
+<p>Daisy was a little hurt at the idea that she might find Aunt Sophy's
+pony too much for her&mdash;a sleepy little 'slug of a thing,' as she
+privately called it, which pattered along exactly like a clockwork
+animal in urgent need of winding up.</p>
+
+<p>Don seemed a little better that day, and was lifted into the pony-cart,
+where he lay on the indiarubber mat, sniffing the air as if it was doing
+him good.</p>
+
+<p>Daisy really could drive well for her age, and woke the pony up in a
+manner that astonished her aunt, who remarked from time to time that she
+knew Wildfire wanted to walk now&mdash;he never could trot long at a
+time&mdash;and so they reached the Netherbys' house, which was five miles
+away towards the head of the lake, well under the hour, a most
+surprising feat&mdash;for Wildfire.</p>
+
+<p>It was a grown-up tennis-party, and Daisy, although she had brought her
+racket, was a little afraid to play; besides, she wanted to consult
+young Mr. Netherby about Don, who had been left with the cart in the
+stables.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. Netherby, who was a good-natured, red-faced young soldier, just
+about to join his regiment, was not playing either, so Daisy went up to
+him on the first opportunity.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_138" id="Page_138">[Pg 138]</a></span></p><p>'You know about dogs, Mr. Netherby, don't you?'</p>
+
+<p>'Rath-er!' said Mr. Netherby, who was a trifle slangy. 'Why? Are you
+thinking of investing in a dog?'</p>
+
+<p>'It's Aunt Sophy's dog,' explained Daisy, 'and he's ill&mdash;<i>very</i> ill&mdash;and
+we can't make out what's the matter, so I thought you would tell us
+perhaps?'</p>
+
+<p>'I'll ride over to-morrow and have a look at him.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, but you needn't&mdash;he's here. Wait&mdash;I'll fetch him&mdash;don't you come,
+please.'</p>
+
+<p>And presently Daisy made her appearance on the lawn, carrying Don, who
+felt quite a weight, in her arms. She set him down before the young man,
+who examined him in a knowing manner, while Miss Millikin, and some
+others who were not playing just then, gathered round. Don was languid,
+but dignified&mdash;he rather liked being the subject of so much notice.
+Daisy waited breathlessly for the verdict.</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Mr. Netherby, 'it's easy enough to see what's wrong with
+<i>him</i>. I should knock off his grub.'</p>
+
+<p>'But,' cried Miss Millikin, 'we <i>have</i> knocked off his grub, as you call
+it. The poor dog is starved&mdash;literally starved.'</p>
+
+<p>Mr. Netherby said he should scarcely have supposed so from his
+appearance.</p>
+
+<p>'But I assure you he has eaten nothing&mdash;positively nothing&mdash;for days and
+days!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_139" id="Page_139">[Pg 139]</a></span></p><p>'Ah,' said Mr. Netherby, 'chameleon, is he? then he's had too much
+air&mdash;that's all.'</p>
+
+<p>Just then a young lady who had been brought by some friends living close
+by joined the group: 'Why,' she said at once, 'that's the little steamer
+dog. How did he come here?'</p>
+
+<p>'He is <i>not</i> a little steamer dog,' said Miss Millikin in her most
+dignified manner; 'he is <i>my</i> dog.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I didn't know,' said the first speaker; 'but&mdash;but I'm sure I've
+seen him on the steamer several times lately.'</p>
+
+<p>'I never use the steamers unless I'm absolutely obliged&mdash;I disapprove of
+them: it must have been some other dog.'</p>
+
+<p>The young lady was positive she had made no mistake. 'You so seldom see
+a dog with just those markings,' she said, 'and I don't think anybody
+was with him; he came on board at Amblemere and went all round the lake
+with us.'</p>
+
+<p>'At Amblemere!' cried Daisy, 'that's where <i>we</i> live; and, Aunt Sophy,
+you know Don has been away all day lots of times lately.'</p>
+
+<p>'What did this dog do on the steamer?' asked Miss Millikin faintly.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, he was so sweet! he went round to everybody, and sat up so prettily
+till they gave him biscuits and things&mdash;he was everybody's pet; we were
+all jealous of one another for the honour of feeding him. The second
+time we brought buns on <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_140" id="Page_140">[Pg 140]</a></span>purpose. But we quite thought he belonged to
+the steamer.'</p>
+
+<p>Young Mr. Netherby laughed. 'So <i>that</i> is how he took the air! I thought
+I wasn't far wrong,' he said.</p>
+
+<p>'Put him back in the cart, Daisy,' said Miss Millikin severely; 'I can't
+bear to look at him.'</p>
+
+<p>Don did his best to follow this dialogue, but all he could make out was
+that it was about himself, and that he was being as usual exceedingly
+admired. So he sat and looked as good and innocent and interesting as he
+knew how. Just then he felt that he would almost rather they did <i>not</i>
+offer him anything to eat&mdash;at least not anything very sweet and rich,
+for he was still not at all well. It was a relief to be back in the cart
+and in peace again, though he wondered why Daisy didn't kiss the top of
+his head as she had done several times in carrying him to the lawn. This
+time she held him at a distance, and said nothing but two words, which
+sounded suspiciously like 'You <i>pig</i>!' as she put him down.</p>
+
+<p>Miss Millikin was very grave and silent as they drove home. 'I can't
+trust myself to speak about it, Daisy,' she said; 'if&mdash;if it was true,
+it shows such an utter want of principle&mdash;such deceit; and Don used to
+be so honest and straightforward! What if we make inquiries at the pier?
+It&mdash;it may be all a mistake.'</p>
+
+<p>They stopped for this purpose at Amblemere. 'Ay, Miss Millikin, mum, he
+cooms ahn boord reglar,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_141" id="Page_141">[Pg 141]</a></span> does that wee dug,' said the old boatman, 'and
+a' makes himsel' rare an' frien'ly, a' do&mdash;they coddle him oop fine,
+amang 'em. Eh, but he's a smart little dug, we quite look for him of a
+morning coomin' for his constitutionil, fur arl the worl' like a
+Chreestian!'</p>
+
+<p>'Like a very <i>greedy</i> Christian!' said his disgusted mistress. 'Daisy,'
+she said, when she returned to the pony-cart, 'it's all true! I&mdash;I never
+have been so deceived in any one; and the worst of it is, I don't know
+how to punish him, or how to make him feel what a disgraceful trick this
+is. Nobody else's dog I ever heard of made his mistress publicly absurd
+in this way. It's so&mdash;so ungrateful!'</p>
+
+<p>'Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy, 'I've an idea. Will you leave him to me, and
+pretend you don't suspect anything? I <i>will</i> cure him this time!'</p>
+
+<p>'You&mdash;you won't want to whip him?' said Miss Millikin, 'because, though
+it's all his own doing, he really is not well enough for it just now.'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' said Daisy, 'I won't tell you my plan, auntie, but it's better
+than whipping.'</p>
+
+<p>And all this time the unconscious Don was wearing an expression of
+uncomplaining suffering, and looking meekly sorry for himself, with no
+suspicion in the world that he had been found out.</p>
+
+<p>Next day he felt much better, and as the morning was bright he thought
+that, after all, he might manage another steamer trip; his appetite had
+come back, and his breath was not nearly so short as it had<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_142" id="Page_142">[Pg 142]</a></span> been. He
+was just making modestly for the gate when Daisy stopped him. 'Where are
+you going, sir?' she inquired.</p>
+
+<p>Don rolled over instantly with all his legs in the air and a feeble
+apology in his eye.</p>
+
+<p>'I want you for just one minute first,' said Daisy politely, and carried
+him into the morning-room. Was he going to be whipped?&mdash;she couldn't
+have the heart&mdash;an invalid like him! He tried to protest by his
+whimpering.</p>
+
+<p>But Daisy did nothing of the kind; she merely took something that was
+flat and broad and white, and fastened it round his neck with a very
+ornamental bow and ribbon. Then she opened the French windows, and said
+in rather a chilly voice, 'Now run away and get on your nasty steamer
+and beg, and see what you get by it!'</p>
+
+<p>That seemed, as far as he could tell, very sensible advice, and, oddly
+enough, it was exactly what he had been intending to do. It did not
+strike him as particularly strange that Daisy should know, because Don
+was a dog that didn't go very deeply into matters unless he was obliged.</p>
+
+<p>He trotted off at an easy pace down to the village, getting hungrier
+every minute, and hoping that the people on the steamer would have
+brought nice things to-day, when, close to the turning that led to the
+landing-stage, he met Jock, and was naturally obliged to stop for a few
+moments' conversation.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[Pg 143]</a></span></p><p>He was not at all pleased to see him notwithstanding, for I am sorry to
+say that Don's greediness had so grown upon him of late that he was
+actually afraid that his humble friend (who was a little slow to find
+out when he wasn't wanted) would accompany him on to the steamboat, and
+then of course the good things would have to be divided.</p>
+
+<p>However, Don was a dog that was always scrupulously polite, even to his
+fellow-dogs, and he did not like to be rude now.</p>
+
+<p>'Hullo!' said Jock (in dogs' language of course, but I have reason to
+believe that what follows is as nearly as possible what was actually
+said). 'What's the matter with you this morning?'</p>
+
+<p>Don replied that he was rather out of sorts, and was going down to a
+certain lane for a dose of dog-grass.</p>
+
+<p>'A little dog-grass won't do <i>me</i> any harm,' said Jock; 'I'll come too.'</p>
+
+<p>This was awkward, but Don pretended to be glad, and they went a little
+way together.</p>
+
+<p>'But what's that thing round your neck?' asked the Dandie Dinmont.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh,' said Don, 'that? It's a bit of finery they put on me at the
+cottage. It pleases <i>them</i>, you know. Think it's becoming?'</p>
+
+<p>'Um,' answered Jock; 'reminds me of a thing a friend of mine used to
+wear. But <i>he</i> had a blind man tied to him. I don't see <i>your</i> blind
+man.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[Pg 144]</a></span></p><p>'They would have given me a blind man of course if I'd asked for it,'
+said Don airily, 'but what's the use of a blind man&mdash;isn't he rather a
+bore?'</p>
+
+<p>'I didn't ask; but my friend said he believed the thing round his neck,
+which was flat and white just like yours (only he had a tin mug
+underneath his), made people more inclined to give him things&mdash;he didn't
+know why. Do <i>you</i> find that?'</p>
+
+<p>'How stupid of Daisy to forget the mug!' thought Don. 'I could have
+brought things home to eat quietly then.&mdash;I don't know,' he replied to
+Jock; 'I haven't tried.'</p>
+
+<p>He meant to put it to the test very soon, though&mdash;if only he could get
+rid of Jock.</p>
+
+<p>'By the way,' he said carelessly, 'have you been round by the hotel
+lately?'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' answered Jock, 'not since the ostler threw a brush at me.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Don, 'there was a bone outside the porch, which, if I
+hadn't been feeling so poorly, I should have had a good mind to tackle
+myself. But perhaps some other dog has got hold of it by this time.'</p>
+
+<p>'I'll soon make him let go if he has!' said Jock, who liked a fight
+almost as well as a bone. '<i>Where</i> was it, did you say?'</p>
+
+<p>'Outside the hotel. Don't let me keep you. It was a beautiful bone.
+Good-morning,' said Don.</p>
+
+<p>He did not think it worth while to explain that he<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[Pg 145]</a></span> had seen it several
+days ago, for Don, as you will have remarked already, was a very artful
+dog.</p>
+
+<p>He got rid of his unwelcome friend in this highly unprincipled manner,
+and strolled on to the pier full of expectation. Steamers ply pretty
+frequently on this particular lake, so he had not to wait very long. The
+little <i>Cygnet</i> soon came hissing up, and the moment the gangway was
+placed Don stepped on board, with tail proudly erect.</p>
+
+<p>As usual, he examined the passengers, first to see who had anything to
+give, then who looked most likely to give it to him. Generally he did
+best with children. He was not fond of children (Daisy was quite an
+exception), but he was very fond of cakes, and children, he had
+observed, generally had the best cakes. Don was so accomplished a
+courtier that he would contrive to make every child believe that he or
+she was the only person he loved in the whole world, and he would stay
+by his victim until the cake was all gone, and even a little longer,
+just for the look of the thing, and then move on to some one else and
+begin again.</p>
+
+<p>There were no children with any cakes or buns on board this time,
+however. There was a stout man up by the bows, dividing his attention
+between scenery and sandwiches; but Don knew by experience that
+tourists' sandwiches are always made with mustard, which he hated. There
+were three merry-looking, round-faced young ladies on a centre bench,
+eating<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[Pg 146]</a></span> Osborne biscuits. He wished they could have made it
+sponge-cakes, because he was rather tired of Osborne biscuits; but they
+were better than nothing. So to these young ladies he went, and, placing
+himself where he could catch all their eyes at once, he sat up in the
+way he had always found irresistible.</p>
+
+<p>I don't suppose any dog ever found his expectations more cruelly
+disappointed. It was not merely that they shook their heads, they went
+into fits of laughter&mdash;they were laughing at him! Don was so deeply
+offended that he took himself off at once, and tried an elderly person
+who was munching seed-cake; she did not laugh, but she examined him
+carefully, and then told him with a frown to go away. He began to think
+that Daisy's collar was not a success; he ought to have had a mug, or a
+blind man, or both; he did much better when he was left to himself.</p>
+
+<p>Still he persevered, and went about, wagging his tail and sitting up
+appealingly. By and by he began to have an uncomfortable idea that
+people were saying things about him which were not complimentary. He was
+almost sure he heard the word 'greedy,' and he knew what that meant: he
+had been taught by Daisy. They must be talking of some other dog&mdash;not
+him; they couldn't possibly know what he was!</p>
+
+<p>Now Don was undeniably a very intelligent terrier indeed, but there was
+just this defect in his education&mdash;he could not read: he had no idea
+what things could be conveyed by innocent-looking little black<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[Pg 147]</a></span> marks.
+'Of course not,' some of my readers will probably exclaim, 'he was only
+a dog!' But it is not so absurd as it sounds, for one very distinguished
+man has succeeded in teaching his dogs to read and even to spell, though
+I believe they have not got into very advanced books as yet. Still, it
+may happen some day that all but hopelessly backward or stupid dogs will
+be able to read fluently, and then you may find that your own family dog
+has taken this book into his kennel, and firmly declines to give it up
+until he has finished it. At present, thank goodness, we have not come
+to this, and so there is nothing remarkable in the mere fact that Don
+was unable to read. I only mention it because, if he <i>had</i> possessed
+this accomplishment, he would never have fallen into the trap Daisy had
+prepared for him.</p>
+
+<p>For the new collar was, as you perhaps guessed long ago, a card, and
+upon it was written, in Daisy's neatest and plainest round hand:&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<div>I am a very Greedy little Dog, and have Plenty to eat at Home,</div>
+<div>So please do not give me anything, or I shall have a Fit and die!</div>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>You can easily imagine that, when this unlucky Don sat up and begged,
+bearing this inscription written legibly on his unconscious little
+chest, the effect was likely to be too much for the gravity of all but
+very stiff and solemn persons.</p>
+
+<p>Nearly everybody on board the steamer was delighted with him; they
+pointed out the joke to one another, and roared with laughter, until he
+grew quite<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[Pg 148]</a></span> ashamed to sit up any more. Some teased him by pretending to
+give him something, and then eating it themselves; some seemed almost
+sorry for him and petted him; and one, an American, said, 'It was
+playing it too low down to make the little critter give himself away in
+that style!' But nobody quite liked to disobey Daisy's written appeal.</p>
+
+<p>Poor Don could not understand it in the least; he only saw that every
+one was very rude and disrespectful to him, and he tried to get away
+under benches. But it was all in vain; people routed him out from his
+hiding-places to be introduced to each new comer; he could not go
+anywhere without being stared at, and followed, and hemmed in, and
+hearing always that same hateful whisper of 'Greedy dog&mdash;not to be given
+anything,' until he felt exactly as if he was being washed!</p>
+
+<p>Poor disappointed greedy dog, how gladly he would have given the tail
+between his legs to be safe at home in the drawing-room with Miss
+Millikin and Daisy! How little he had bargained for such a terrible trip
+as this!</p>
+
+<p>I am sure that if Daisy had ever imagined he would feel his disgrace so
+deeply she would not have had the heart to send him out with that
+tell-tale card around his neck; but then he would not have received a
+very wholesome lesson, and would certainly have eaten himself into a
+serious illness before the summer ended, so perhaps it was all for the
+best.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[Pg 149]</a></span></p><p>This time Don did <i>not</i> go the whole round of the lake; he had had
+quite enough of it long before the <i>Cygnet</i> reached Highwood, but he did
+not get a chance until they came to Winderside, and then, watching his
+opportunity, he gave his tormentors the slip at last.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>Two hours later, as Daisy and her aunt sat sketching under the big
+holm-oak on the lawn, a dusty little guilty dog stole sneakingly in
+under the garden-gate. It was Don, and he had run all the way from
+Winderside, which, though he did not appreciate it, had done him a vast
+amount of good. 'Oh!' cried Daisy, dropping her paint-brush to clap her
+hands gleefully, 'Look, Aunt Sophy, he has had his lesson already!'</p>
+
+<p>Miss Millikin was inclined to be shocked when she read the ticket. 'It
+was too bad of you, Daisy!' she said; 'I would never have allowed it if
+I had known. Come here, Don, and let me take the horrid thing off.'</p>
+
+<p>'Not yet, please, auntie!' pleaded Daisy, 'I want him to be quite cured,
+and it will take at least till bedtime. Then we'll make it up to him.'</p>
+
+<p>But Don had understood at last. It was this detestable thing, then, that
+had been telling tales of him and spoiling all his fun! Very well, let
+him find himself alone with it&mdash;just once! And he went off very soberly
+into the shrubbery, whence in a few minutes came sounds of 'worrying.'</p>
+
+<p>In half an hour Don came out again; his collar<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_150" id="Page_150">[Pg 150]</a></span> was gone, and in his
+mouth he trailed a long piece of chewed ribbon, which he dropped with
+the queerest mixture of penitence and reproach at Daisy's feet. After
+that, of course, it was impossible to do anything but take him into
+favour at once, and he was generous enough to let Daisy see that he bore
+her no malice for the trick she had played him.</p>
+
+<p>What became of the card no one ever discovered; perhaps Don had buried
+it, though Daisy has very strong suspicions that he ate it as his best
+revenge.</p>
+
+<p>But what is more important is that from that day he became a slim and
+reformed dog, refusing firmly to go on board a steamer on any pretence
+whatever, and only consenting to sit up after much coaxing, and as a
+mark of particular condescension.</p>
+
+<p>So that Daisy's experiment, whatever may be thought of it, was at least
+a successful one.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_151" id="Page_151">[Pg 151]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="TAKEN_BY_SURPRISE" id="TAKEN_BY_SURPRISE"></a><i>TAKEN BY SURPRISE</i></h2>
+
+<h3>BEING THE PERSONAL STATEMENT OF BEDELL GRUNCHER, M.A.</h3>
+
+<p>There are certain misconceptions which a man who is prominently before
+the public is morally bound to combat&mdash;more for the sake of others than
+his own&mdash;as soon as it becomes probable that the popular estimate of his
+character may be shaken, if not shattered, should he hold his peace.
+Convinced as I am of this, and having some ground to anticipate that the
+next few days may witness a damaging blow to my personal dignity and
+influence for good, I have thought it expedient to publish the true
+history of an episode which, if unexplained, is only too likely to
+prejudice me to a serious extent. Any circumstance that tends to
+undermine or lessen the world's reverence for its instructors is a
+deplorable calamity, to be averted at all hazards, even when this can
+only be effected by disclosures scarcely less painful to a delicate
+mind.</p>
+
+<p>For some years I, Bedell Gruncher, have consecrated my poor talents to
+the guidance and education<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_152" id="Page_152">[Pg 152]</a></span> of public taste in questions of art and
+literature. To do this effectively I have laboured&mdash;at the cost of some
+personal inconvenience&mdash;to acquire a critical style of light and playful
+badinage. My lash has ever been wreathed in ribbons of rare texture and
+daintiest hues; I have thrown cold water in abundance over the nascent
+flames of young ambition&mdash;but such water was systematically tinctured
+with attar of roses. And in time the articles appearing in various
+periodicals above the signature of 'Vitriol' became, I may acknowledge
+without false modesty, so many literary events of the first magnitude. I
+attribute this to my early recognition of the true function of a critic.
+It is not for him to set up sign-posts, or even warning-boards, for
+those who run and read. To attain true distinction he should erect a
+pillory upon his study table, and start the fun himself with a choice
+selection of the literary analogues of the superannuated eggs and futile
+kittens which served as projectiles in the past. The public may be
+trusted to keep it going, and also to retain a grateful recollection of
+the original promoter of the sport. My little weekly and monthly
+pillories became instantly popular, for all my kittens were well aimed,
+and my eggs broke and stuck in a highly entertaining fashion. We are so
+constituted that even the worst of us is capable of a kindly feeling
+towards the benefactor who makes others imperishably ridiculous in our
+eyes; and to do this was my <i>m&eacute;tier &agrave; moi</i>. At first my identity with<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_153" id="Page_153">[Pg 153]</a></span>
+the lively but terrible 'Vitriol' was kept a profound secret, but
+gradually, by some means which I do not at present remember, it leaked
+out, and I immediately became a social, as well as a literary,
+celebrity. Physically I have been endowed with a presence which, though
+not of unusual height and somewhat inclined to central expansion,
+produces, I find, an invariably imposing effect, especially with members
+of the more emotional and impressionable sex. Consequently I was not
+surprised even at the really extraordinary sensation I inspired upon my
+first introduction to a very charming young lady, Miss Iris Waverley, as
+soon as my <i>nom de guerre</i> was (I forget just now by whom) incidentally
+alluded to. However, as it turned out, she had another and a deeper
+reason for emotion: it seemed she had been engaged to a young poet whose
+verses, to her untaught and girlish judgment, seemed inspired by
+draughts of the true Helicon, and whose rhythmical raptures had stirred
+her maiden heart to its depths.</p>
+
+<p>Well, that young poet's latest volume of verse came under my notice for
+review, and in my customary light-hearted fashion I held it up to
+general derision for a column or two, and then dismissed it, with an
+ineffaceable epigrammatic kick, to spin for ever (approximately) down
+the ringing grooves of criticism.</p>
+
+<p>Miss Waverley, it happened, was inclined to correct her own views by the
+opinions of others, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_154" id="Page_154">[Pg 154]</a></span> was, moreover, exceptionally sensitive to any
+association of ridicule with the objects of her attachment&mdash;indeed, she
+once despatched a dog she fondly loved to the lethal chamber at
+Battersea, merely because all the hair had come off the poor animal's
+tail! My trenchant sarcasms had depoetised her lover in a similar
+fashion; their livid lightning had revealed the baldness, the glaring
+absurdity of the very stanzas which once had filled her eyes with
+delicious tears; he was dismissed, and soon disappeared altogether from
+the circles which I had (in perfect innocence) rendered impossible to
+him.</p>
+
+<p>Notwithstanding this, Miss Waverley's first sentiments towards me were
+scarcely, oddly enough, of unmixed gratitude. I represented the rod, and
+a very commendable feeling of propriety made her unwilling to kiss me on
+a first interview, though, as our intimacy advanced&mdash;well, there are
+subjects on which I claim the privilege of a manly reticence.</p>
+
+<p>I hasten over, then, the intermediate stages of antipathy, fear,
+respect, interest, and adoration. In me she recognised an intellect
+naturally superior, too indifferent and unambitious to give life to its
+own imaginings&mdash;too honest, too devoted to humanity, to withhold merited
+condemnation from those of others. I was the radiant sun whose scorching
+beams melted the wax from the pinions of many a modern Icarus; or, to
+put the metaphor less ingeniously, the shining light in which, by an
+irresistible impulse of <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_155" id="Page_155">[Pg 155]</a></span>self-destruction, the poetical and artistic
+moths flew and incontinently frizzled.</p>
+
+<p>One trait in my character which Iris valued above all others was the
+caution with which I habitually avoided all associations of a ridiculous
+nature; for it was my pride to preserve a demeanour of unsullied dignity
+under circumstances which would have been trying, if not fatal, to an
+ordinary person. So we became engaged; and if, pecuniarily speaking, the
+advantage of the union inclined to my side, I cannot consider that I was
+the party most benefited by the transaction.</p>
+
+<p>It was soon after this happy event that Iris entreated from me, as a
+gift, a photograph of myself. I could not help being struck by this
+instance of feminine parsimony with regard to small disbursements,
+since, for the trifling sum of one shilling, it was perfectly open to
+her to procure an admirable presentment of me at almost any stationer's;
+for, in obedience to a widely expressed demand, I had already more than
+once undergone the ordeal by camera.</p>
+
+<p>But no; she professed to desire a portrait more peculiarly her own&mdash;one
+that should mark the precise epoch of our mutual happiness&mdash;a caprice
+which reminded me of the Salvation Army recruit who was photographed, by
+desire, 'before and after conversion'; and I demurred a little, until
+Iris insisted with such captivating pertinacity that&mdash;although my
+personal expenses (always slightly in excess of my income) had<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_156" id="Page_156">[Pg 156]</a></span> been
+further swelled since my engagement by the innumerable <i>petits soins</i>
+expected by an absurd custom from every lover&mdash;I gave way at length.</p>
+
+<p>It was her desire that my portrait should form a pendant to one of
+herself which had been recently taken by a fashionable photographer, and
+I promised to see that this wish should be gratified. It is possible
+that she expected me to resort to the same artist; but there were
+considerations which induced me to avoid this, if I could. To the extent
+of a guinea (or even thirty shillings) I could refuse her nothing; but
+every one knows what sums are demanded by a photographer who is at all
+in vogue. I might, to be sure, as a public character, have sat without
+being called upon for any consideration, beyond the right to dispose of
+copies of my photograph; but I felt that Iris would be a little hurt if
+I took this course, and none of the West-end people whom I consulted in
+the matter quite saw their way to such an arrangement just then. There
+was a temporary lull, they assured me, in the demand for likenesses of
+our leading literary men, and I myself had been photographed within too
+recent a period to form any exception to the rule.</p>
+
+<p>So, keeping my promise constantly in mind, I never entered a secluded
+neighbourhood without being on the look-out for some unpretending
+photographic studio which would combine artistic excellence with
+moderate charges.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_157" id="Page_157">[Pg 157]</a></span></p><p>And at last I discovered this photographic ph&oelig;nix, whose nest, if I
+may so term it, was in a retired suburb which I do not care to
+particularise. Upon the street level was a handsome plate-glass window,
+in which, against a background of dark purple hangings and potted ferns,
+were displayed cartes, cabinets, and groups, in which not even my
+trained faculties could detect the least inferiority to the more costly
+productions of the West-end, while the list of prices that hung by the
+door was conceived in a spirit of exemplary modesty. After a brief
+period of hesitation I stepped inside, and, on stating my wish to be
+photographed at once, was invited by a very civil youth with a slight
+cast in his eye to walk upstairs, which I accordingly did.</p>
+
+<p>I mounted flight after flight of stairs, till I eventually found myself
+at the top of the house, in an apartment pervaded by a strong odour of
+chemicals, and glazed along the roof and the whole of one side with
+panes of a bluish tint. It was empty at the moment of my entrance, but,
+after a few minutes, the photographer burst impetuously in&mdash;a tall young
+man, with long hair and pale eyes, whose appearance denoted a nervous
+and high-strung temperament. Perceiving him to be slightly overawed by a
+certain unconscious dignity in my bearing, which frequently does produce
+that effect upon strangers, I hastened to reassure him by discriminating
+eulogies upon the specimens of his art that I had been inspecting
+below,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_158" id="Page_158">[Pg 158]</a></span> and I saw at once that he was readily susceptible to flattery.</p>
+
+<p>'You will find me,' I told him frankly, 'a little more difficult to
+satisfy than your ordinary <i>client&egrave;le</i>; but, on the other hand, I am
+peculiarly capable of appreciating really good work. Now I was struck at
+once by the delicacy of tone, the nice discrimination of values, the
+atmosphere, gradation, feeling, and surface of the examples displayed in
+your window.'</p>
+
+<p>He bowed almost to the ground; but, having taken careful note of his
+prices, I felt secure in commending him, even to the verge of
+extravagance; and, besides, does not the artistic nature demand the
+stimulus of praise to enable it to put forth its full powers?</p>
+
+<p>He inquired in what style I wished to be taken, whether full-length,
+half-length, or vignette. 'I will answer you as concisely as possible,'
+I said. 'I have been pressed, by one whose least preference is a law to
+me, to have a photograph of myself executed which shall form a
+counterpart or pendant, as it were, to her own. I have, therefore, taken
+the precaution to bring her portrait with me for your guidance. You will
+observe it is the work of a firm in my opinion greatly
+overrated&mdash;Messrs. Lenz, Kamerer, &amp; Co.; and, while you will follow it
+in style and the disposition of the accessories, you will, I make no
+doubt, produce, if you take ordinary pains, a picture vastly superior in
+artistic merit.'</p>
+
+<p>This, as will be perceived, was skilfully designed<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_159" id="Page_159">[Pg 159]</a></span> to put him on his
+mettle, and rouse a useful spirit of emulation. He took the portrait of
+Iris from my hands and carried it to the light, where he examined it
+gravely in silence.</p>
+
+<p>'I presume,' he said at length, 'that I need hardly tell you I cannot
+pledge myself to produce a result as pleasing as this&mdash;under the
+circumstances?'</p>
+
+<p>'That,' I replied, 'rests entirely with you. If you overcome your
+natural diffidence, and do yourself full justice, <i>I</i> see no reason why
+you should not obtain something even more satisfactory.'</p>
+
+<p>My encouragement almost unmanned him. He turned abruptly away and blew
+his nose violently with a coloured silk handkerchief.</p>
+
+<p>'Come, come,' I said, smiling kindly, 'you see I have every confidence
+in you&mdash;let us begin. I don't know, by the way,' I added, with a sudden
+afterthought, 'whether in your leisure moments you take any interest in
+contemporary literature?'</p>
+
+<p>'I&mdash;I have done so in my time,' he admitted; 'not very lately.'</p>
+
+<p>'Then,' I continued, watching his countenance with secret amusement for
+the spasm I find this announcement invariably produces upon persons of
+any education, 'it may possibly call up some associations in your mind
+if I tell you that I am perhaps better known by my self-conferred
+<i>sobriquet</i> of "Vitriol."'</p>
+
+<p>Evidently I had to do with a man of some <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_160" id="Page_160">[Pg 160]</a></span>intelligence&mdash;I obtained an
+even more electrical effect than usual. '"<i>Vitriol!</i>"' he cried, '<i>not</i>
+surely Vitriol, the great critic?'</p>
+
+<p>'The same,' I said carelessly. 'I thought I had better mention it.'</p>
+
+<p>'You did well,' he rejoined, 'very well! Pardon my emotion&mdash;may I wring
+that hand?'</p>
+
+<p>It is not my practice to shake hands with a photographer, but I was
+touched and gratified by his boyish enthusiasm, and he seemed a
+gentlemanly young fellow too, so I made an exception in his favour; and
+he did wring my hand&mdash;hard.</p>
+
+<p>'So you are Vitriol?' he repeated in a kind of daze, 'and you have
+sought me out&mdash;<i>me</i>, of all people in the world&mdash;to have the honour of
+taking your photograph!'</p>
+
+<p>'That is so,' I said, 'but pardon me if I warn you that you must not
+allow your head to be turned by what is, in truth, due to the merest
+accident.'</p>
+
+<p>'But what an accident!' he cried; 'after what I have learnt I really
+could not think of making any charge for this privilege!'</p>
+
+<p>That was a creditable and not unnatural impulse, and I did not check it.
+'You shall take me as often as you please,' I said, 'and for nothing.'</p>
+
+<p>'And may I,' he said, a little timidly&mdash;'would you give me permission to
+exhibit the results?'</p>
+
+<p>'If I followed my own inclinations,' I replied, 'I should answer
+"certainly not." But perhaps I have<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_161" id="Page_161">[Pg 161]</a></span> no right to deprive you of the
+advertisement, and still less to withhold my unworthy features from
+public comment. I may, for private reasons,' I added, thinking of Iris,
+'find it advisable to make some show of displeasure, but you need not
+fear my taking any proceedings to restrain you.'</p>
+
+<p>'We struggling photographers must be so careful,' he sighed. 'Suppose
+the case of your lamented demise&mdash;it would be a protection if I had some
+written authority under your hand to show your legal representatives.'</p>
+
+<p>'<i>Actio personalis moritur cum person&acirc;</i>,' I replied; 'if my executors
+brought an action, they would find themselves non-suited.' (I had
+studied for the Bar at one period of my life.)</p>
+
+<p>'Quite so,' he said, 'but they might drag me into court, nevertheless. I
+should really prefer to be on the safe side.'</p>
+
+<p>It did not seem unreasonable, particularly as I had not the remotest
+intention either of bringing an action or dying; so I wrote him a hasty
+memorandum to the effect that, in consideration of his photographing me
+free of charge (I took care to put <i>that</i> in), I undertook to hold him
+free from all molestation or hindrance whatever in respect of the sale
+and circulation of all copies resulting from such photographing as
+aforesaid.</p>
+
+<p>'Will that do?' I said as I handed it to him.</p>
+
+<p>His eyes gleamed as he took the document. 'It<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_162" id="Page_162">[Pg 162]</a></span> is just what I wanted,'
+he said gratefully; 'and now, if you will excuse me, I will go and bring
+in a few accessories, and then we will get to work.'</p>
+
+<p>He withdrew in a state of positive exultation, leaving me to
+congratulate myself upon the happy chance which had led me to his door.
+One does not discover a true artist every day, capable of approaching
+his task in a proper spirit of reverence and enthusiasm; and I had
+hardly expected, after my previous failures, to be spared all personal
+outlay. My sole regret, indeed, was that I had not stipulated for a
+share in the profits arising from the sale&mdash;which would be doubtless a
+large one; but meanness is not one of my vices, and I decided not to
+press this point.</p>
+
+<p>Presently he returned with something which bulged inside his velvet
+jacket, and a heap of things which he threw down in a corner behind a
+screen.</p>
+
+<p>'A few little properties,' he said; 'we may be able to introduce them
+by-and-by.'</p>
+
+<p>Then he went to the door and, with a rapid action, turned the key and
+placed it in his pocket.</p>
+
+<p>'You will hardly believe,' he explained, 'how nervous I am on occasions
+of importance like this; the bare possibility of interruption would
+render me quite incapable of doing myself justice.'</p>
+
+<p>I had never met any photographer quite so sensitive as that before, and
+I began to be uneasy about his success; but I know what the artistic
+<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_163" id="Page_163">[Pg 163]</a></span>temperament is, and, as he said, this was not like an ordinary
+occasion.</p>
+
+<p>'Before I proceed to business,' he said, in a voice that positively
+trembled, 'I must tell you what an exceptional claim you have to my
+undying gratitude. Amongst the many productions which you have visited
+with your salutary satire you may possibly recall a little volume of
+poems entitled "Pants of Passion"?'</p>
+
+<p>I shook my head good-humouredly. 'My good friend,' I told him, 'if I
+burdened my memory with all the stuff I have to pronounce sentence upon,
+do you suppose my brain would be what it is?'</p>
+
+<p>He looked crestfallen. 'No,' he said slowly, 'I ought to have known&mdash;you
+would not remember, of course. But <i>I</i> do. I brought out those Pants.
+Your mordant pen tore them to tatters. You convinced me that I had
+mistaken my career, and, thanks to your monitions, I ceased to practise
+as a Poet, and became the Photographer you now behold!'</p>
+
+<p>'And I have known poets,' I said encouragingly, 'who have ended far less
+creditably. For even an indifferent photographer is in closer harmony
+with nature than a mediocre poet.'</p>
+
+<p>'And I <i>was</i> mediocre, wasn't I?' he inquired humbly.</p>
+
+<p>'So far as I recollect,' I replied (for I did begin to remember him
+now), 'to attribute mediocrity to you<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_164" id="Page_164">[Pg 164]</a></span> would have been beyond the
+audacity of the grossest sycophant.'</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you,' he said; 'you little know how you encourage me in my
+present undertaking&mdash;for you will admit that I can <i>photograph</i>?'</p>
+
+<p>'That,' I replied, 'is intelligible enough, photography being a pursuit
+demanding less mental ability in its votaries than that of metrical
+composition, however halting.'</p>
+
+<p>'There is something very soothing about your conversation,' he remarked;
+'it heals my self-love&mdash;which really was wounded by the things you
+wrote.'</p>
+
+<p>'Pooh, pooh!' I said indulgently, 'we must all of us go through that in
+our time&mdash;at least all of <i>you</i> must go through it.'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' he admitted sadly, 'but it ain't pleasant, is it?'</p>
+
+<p>'Of that I have never been in a position to judge,' said I; 'but you
+must remember that your sufferings, though doubtless painful to
+yourself, are the cause, under capable treatment, of infinite pleasure
+and amusement to others. Try to look at the thing without egotism. Shall
+I seat myself on that chair I see over there?'</p>
+
+<p>He was eyeing me in a curious manner. 'Allow me,' he said; 'I always
+pose my sitters myself.' With that he seized me by the neck and
+elsewhere without the slightest warning, and, carrying me to the further
+end of the studio, flung me carelessly,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_165" id="Page_165">[Pg 165]</a></span> face downwards, over the
+cane-bottomed chair to which I had referred. He was a strong athletic
+young man, in spite of his long hair&mdash;or might that have been, as in
+Samson's case, a contributory cause? I was like an infant in his hands,
+and lay across the chair, in an exceedingly uncomfortable position,
+gasping for breath.</p>
+
+<p>'Try to keep as limp as you can, please,' he said, 'the mouth wide open,
+as you have it now, the legs careless&mdash;in fact, trailing. Beautiful!
+don't move.'</p>
+
+<p>And he went to the camera. I succeeded in partly twisting my head round.
+'Are you <i>mad</i>?' I cried indignantly; 'do you really suppose I shall
+consent to go down to posterity in such a position as this?'</p>
+
+<p>I heard a click, and, to my unspeakable horror, saw that he was
+deliberately covering me from behind the camera with a revolver&mdash;<i>that</i>
+was what I had seen bulging inside his pocket.</p>
+
+<p>'I should be sorry to slay any sitter in cold blood,' he said, 'but I
+must tell you solemnly, that unless you instantly resume your original
+pose&mdash;which was charming&mdash;you are a dead man!'</p>
+
+<p>Not till then did I realise the awful truth&mdash;I was locked up alone, at
+the top of a house, in a quiet neighbourhood, with a mad photographer!
+Summoning to my aid all my presence of mind, I resumed the original pose
+for the space of forty-five <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_166" id="Page_166">[Pg 166]</a></span>hours&mdash;they were seconds really, but they
+<i>seemed</i> hours; it was not needful for him to exhort me to be limp
+again&mdash;I was limper than the dampest towel!</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you very much,' he said gravely as he covered the lens; 'I think
+that will come out very well indeed. You may move now.'</p>
+
+<p>I rose, puffing, but perfectly collected. 'Ha-ha,' I laughed in a sickly
+manner (for I <i>felt</i> sick), 'I&mdash;I perceive, sir, that you are a
+humorist.'</p>
+
+<p>'Since I have abandoned poetry,' he said as he carefully removed the
+negative to a dark place, 'I have developed a considerable sense of
+quiet humour. You will find a large Gainsborough hat in that
+corner&mdash;might I trouble you to put it on for the next sitting?'</p>
+
+<p>'Never!' I cried, thoroughly revolted. 'Surely, with your rare artistic
+perception, you must be aware that such a headdress as that (which is no
+longer worn even by females) is out of all keeping with my physiognomy.
+I will <i>not</i> sit for my photograph in such a preposterous thing!'</p>
+
+<p>'I shall count ten very slowly,' he replied pensively, 'and if by the
+time I have finished you are not seated on the back of that chair, your
+feet crossed so as to overlap, your right thumb in the corner of your
+mouth, a pleasant smile on your countenance, <i>and</i> the Gainsborough hat
+on your head, you will need no more hats on this sorrowful earth.
+One&mdash;two&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_167" id="Page_167">[Pg 167]</a></span></p><p>I was perched on that chair in the prescribed attitude long before he
+had got to seven! How can I describe what it cost me to smile, as I sat
+there under the dry blue light, the perspiration rolling in beads down
+my cheeks, exposed to the gleaming muzzle of the revolver, and the
+steady Gorgon glare of that infernal camera?</p>
+
+<p>'That will be extremely popular,' he said, lowering the weapon as he
+concluded. 'Your smile, perhaps, was a <i>little</i> too broad, but the pose
+was very fresh and unstudied.'</p>
+
+<p>I have always read of the controlling power of the human eye upon wild
+beasts and dangerous maniacs, and I fixed mine firmly upon him now as I
+said sternly, 'Let me out at once&mdash;I wish to go.'</p>
+
+<p>Perhaps I did not fix them quite long enough; perhaps the power of the
+human eye has been exaggerated: I only know that for all the effect mine
+had on him they might have been oysters.</p>
+
+<p>'Not yet,' he said persuasively, 'not when we're getting on so nicely. I
+may never be able to take you under such favourable conditions again.'</p>
+
+<p>That, I thought, I could undertake to answer for; but who, alas! could
+say whether I should ever leave that studio alive? For all I knew, he
+might spend the whole day in photographing me, and then, with a madman's
+caprice, shoot me as soon as it became too dark to go on any longer! The
+proper course to take, I knew, was to humour him, to keep him in a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_168" id="Page_168">[Pg 168]</a></span> good
+temper, fool him to the top of his bent&mdash;it was my only chance.</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' I said, 'perhaps you're right. I&mdash;I'm in no great hurry. Were
+you thinking of taking me in some different style? I am quite at your
+disposition.'</p>
+
+<p>He brought out a small but stout property-mast, and arranged it against
+a canvas background of coast scenery. 'I generally use it for children
+in sailor costume,' he said, 'but I <i>think</i> it will bear your weight
+long enough for the purpose.'</p>
+
+<p>I wiped my brow. 'You are not going to ask me to climb that thing?' I
+faltered.</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' he suggested, 'if you will just arrange yourself upon the
+cross-trees in a negligent attitude, upside down, with your tongue
+protruded as if for medical inspection, I shall be perfectly satisfied.'</p>
+
+<p>I tried argument. 'I should have no objection in the world,' I said;
+'it's an excellent idea&mdash;only, <i>do</i> sailors ever climb masts in that
+way? Wouldn't it be better to have the thing correct while we're about
+it?'</p>
+
+<p>'I was not aware that you were a sailor,' he said; '<i>are</i> you?'</p>
+
+<p>I was afraid to say I was, because I apprehended that, if I did, it
+might occur to him to put me through some still more frightful
+performance.</p>
+
+<p>'Come,' he said, 'you won't compel me to shed blood so early in the
+afternoon, will you? Up with you.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_169" id="Page_169">[Pg 169]</a></span></p><p>I got up, but, as I hung there, I tried to obtain a modification of
+some of the details. 'I don't think,' I said artfully, 'that I'll put
+out my tongue&mdash;it's rather overdone, eh? <i>Everybody</i> is taken with his
+tongue out nowadays.'</p>
+
+<p>'It is true,' he said, 'but I am not well enough known in the profession
+yet to depart entirely from the conventional. Your tongue out as far as
+it will go, please.'</p>
+
+<p>'I shall have a rush of blood to the head, I know I shall,' I protested.</p>
+
+<p>'Look here,' he said; 'am I taking this photograph, or are you?'</p>
+
+<p>There was no possible doubt, unfortunately, as to who was taking the
+photograph. I made one last remonstrance. 'I put it to you as a sensible
+man,' I began; but it is a waste of time to put anything to a raving
+lunatic as a sensible man. It is enough to say that he carried his
+point.</p>
+
+<p>'I wish you could see the negative!' he said as he came back from his
+laboratory. 'You were a little red in the face, but it will come out
+black, so it's all right. That carte will be quite a novelty, I flatter
+myself.'</p>
+
+<p>I groaned. However, this was the end; I would get away now at all
+hazards, and tell the police that there was a dangerous maniac at large.
+I got down from the mast with affected briskness. 'Well,' I said, 'I
+mustn't take advantage of your good nature any<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_170" id="Page_170">[Pg 170]</a></span> longer. I'm exceedingly
+obliged to you for the&mdash;the pains you have taken. You will send <i>all</i>
+the photographs to this address, please?'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't go yet,' he said. 'Are you an equestrian, by the way?'</p>
+
+<p>If I could only engage him in conversation I felt comparatively secure.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I put in an appearance in the Row sometimes, in the season,' I
+replied; 'and, while I think of it,' I added, with what I thought at the
+time was an inspiration, 'if you will come with me now, I'll show you my
+horse&mdash;you might take me on horseback, eh?' I did not possess any such
+animal, but I wanted to have that door unlocked.</p>
+
+<p>'Take you on horseback?' he repeated. 'That's a good idea&mdash;I had rather
+thought of that myself.'</p>
+
+<p>'Then come along and bring your instrument,' I said, 'and you can take
+me at the stables; they're close by.'</p>
+
+<p>'No need for that,' he replied cheerfully. 'I'll find you a mount here.'</p>
+
+<p>And the wretched lunatic went behind the screen and wheeled out a small
+wooden quadruped covered with large round spots!</p>
+
+<p>'She's a strawberry roan,' he said; 'observe the strawberries. So, my
+beauty, quiet, then! Now settle yourself easily in the saddle, as if you
+were in the Row, with your face to the tail.'</p>
+
+<p>'Listen to me for one moment,' I entreated <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_171" id="Page_171">[Pg 171]</a></span>tremulously. 'I assure you
+that I am not in the habit of appearing in Rotten Row on a spotted
+wooden horse, nor does any one, I assure you&mdash;<i>any</i> one mount a horse of
+any description with his face towards the crupper! If you take me like
+that, you will betray your ignorance&mdash;you will be laughed at!'</p>
+
+<p>When people tell you it is possible to hoodwink the insane by any
+specious show of argument, don't believe them; my own experience is that
+demented persons can be quite perversely logical when it suits their
+purpose.</p>
+
+<p>'Pardon me,' he said, '<i>you</i> will be laughed at possibly&mdash;not I. I
+cannot be held responsible for the caprices of my clients. Mount,
+please; she'll carry you perfectly.'</p>
+
+<p>'I will,' I said, 'if you'll give me the revolver to hold. I&mdash;I should
+like to be done with a revolver.'</p>
+
+<p>'I shall be delighted to do you with a revolver,' he said grimly, 'but
+not yet; and if I lent you the weapon now, I could not answer for your
+being able to hold the horse as well&mdash;she has never been broken in to
+firearms. <i>I'll</i> hold the revolver. One&mdash;two&mdash;three.'</p>
+
+<p>I mounted; why had I not disregarded the expense and gone to Lenz and
+Kamerer? Lenz does not pose his customers by the aid of a revolver.
+Kamerer, I was sure, would not put his patrons through these degrading
+tomfooleries.</p>
+
+<p>He took more trouble over this than any of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_172" id="Page_172">[Pg 172]</a></span> others; I was
+photographed from the back, in front, and in profile; and if I escaped
+being made to appear abjectly ridiculous, it can only be owing to the
+tragic earnestness which the consciousness of my awful situation lent to
+my expression.</p>
+
+<p>As he took the last I rolled off the horse, completely prostrated. 'I
+think,' I gasped faintly, 'I would rather be shot at once&mdash;<i>without</i>
+waiting to be taken in any other positions. I really am not equal to any
+more of this!' (He was quite capable, I felt, of photographing me in a
+perambulator, if it once occurred to him!)</p>
+
+<p>'Compose yourself,' he said soothingly, 'I have obtained all I wanted. I
+shall not detain you much longer. Your life, I may remark, was never in
+any imminent danger, as this revolver is unloaded. I have now only to
+thank you for the readiness with which you have afforded me your
+co-operation, and to assure you that early copies of each of the
+photographs shall be forwarded for Miss Waverley's inspection.'</p>
+
+<p>'Miss Waverley!' I exclaimed; 'stay, how do <i>you</i> know that name?'</p>
+
+<p>'If I mistake not, it was her photograph that you kindly brought for my
+guidance. I ought to have mentioned, perhaps, that I once had the honour
+of being engaged to her&mdash;until you (no doubt from the highest motives)
+invested my little gift of song with a flavour of unromantic ridicule.
+That ridicule I am<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_173" id="Page_173">[Pg 173]</a></span> now enabled to repay, with interest calculated up to
+the present date.'</p>
+
+<p>'So you are Iris's poet!' I burst out, for, somehow, I had not
+completely identified him till that moment. 'You scoundrel! do you think
+I shall allow you to circulate those atrocious caricatures with
+impunity? No, by heavens! my solicitor shall&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'I rely upon the document you were kind enough to furnish,' he said
+quietly. 'I fear that any legal proceedings you may resort to will
+hardly avert the publicity you seem to fear. Allow me to unfasten the
+door. Good-bye; mind the step on the first landing. Might I beg you to
+recommend me amongst your friends?'</p>
+
+<p>I went out without another word; he was mad, of course, or he would not
+have devised so outrageous a revenge for a fancied injury, but he was
+cunning enough to be my match. I knew too well that if I took any legal
+measures, he would contrive to shift the whole burden of lunacy upon
+<i>me</i>. I dared not court an inquiry for many reasons, and so I was
+compelled to pass over this unparalleled outrage in silence.</p>
+
+<p>Iris made frequent inquiries after the promised photograph, and I had to
+parry them as well as I could&mdash;which was a mistake in judgment on my
+part, for one afternoon while I was actually sitting with her, a packet
+arrived addressed to Miss Waverley.</p>
+
+<p>I did not suspect what it might contain until it<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_174" id="Page_174">[Pg 174]</a></span> was too late. She
+recognised that photographs were inside the wrappings, which she tore
+open with a cry of rapture&mdash;and then!</p>
+
+<p>She had a short fainting fit when she saw the Gainsborough hat, and as
+soon as she revived, the extraordinary appearance I presented upside
+down on the mast sent her into violent hysterics. By the time she was in
+a condition to look at the equestrian portraits she had grown cold and
+hard as marble. 'Go,' she said, indicating the door, 'I see I have been
+wasting my affection upon a vulgar and heartless buffoon!'</p>
+
+<p>I went&mdash;for she would listen to no explanations; and indeed I doubt
+whether, even were she to come upon this statement, it would serve to
+restore my tarnished ideal in her estimation. But, though I have lost
+her, I am naturally anxious (as I said when I began) that the public
+should not be misled into drawing harsh conclusions from what, if left
+unexplained, may doubtless have a singular appearance.</p>
+
+<p>It is true that, up to the present, I have not been able to learn that
+any of those fatal portraits have absolutely been exposed for sale,
+though I direct my trembling steps almost every day to Regent Street,
+and search the windows of the Stereoscopic Company with furtive and
+foreboding eyes, dreading to be confronted with presentments of
+myself&mdash;Bedell Gruncher, 'Vitriol,' the great critic!&mdash;lying across a
+chair in a state of collapse, sucking my thumb in<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_175" id="Page_175">[Pg 175]</a></span> a Gainsborough hat,
+or bestriding a ridiculous wooden horse with my face towards its tail!</p>
+
+<p>But they cannot be long in coming out now; and my one hope is that these
+lines may appear in print in time to forestall the prejudice and scandal
+which are otherwise inevitable. At all events, now that the world is in
+possession of the real facts, I am entitled to hope that the treatment
+to which I have been subjected will excite the indignation and sympathy
+it deserves.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_176" id="Page_176">[Pg 176]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="PALEFACE_AND_REDSKIN" id="PALEFACE_AND_REDSKIN"></a><i>PALEFACE AND REDSKIN</i></h2>
+
+<h3>A COMEDY-STORY FOR GIRLS AND BOYS</h3>
+
+<h2><a name="ACT_THE_FIRST" id="ACT_THE_FIRST"></a>ACT THE FIRST</h2>
+
+<h3>WHERE IS THE ENEMY?</h3>
+
+<p>It was a very hot afternoon, and Hazel, Hilary, and Cecily Jolliffe were
+sitting under the big cedar on the lawn at The Gables. Each had her
+racket by her side, and the tennis-court lay, smooth and inviting, close
+by; but they did not seem inclined to play just then, and there was
+something in the expression of all three which indicated a common
+grievance.</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Hazel, the eldest, who was nearly fourteen, 'we need not
+have excited ourselves about the boys' holidays, if we had only known.
+They don't give us much of their society&mdash;why, we haven't had one single
+game of cricket together yet!'</p>
+
+<p>'And then to have the impudence to tell us that they didn't care much
+about <i>our</i> sort of cricket!' said Hilary, 'when I can throw up every
+bit as far as Jack, and it takes Guy three overs to bowl me! It's
+beastly cheek of them.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_177" id="Page_177">[Pg 177]</a></span></p><p>'<i>Hilary!</i>' cried Cecily, 'what would mother say if she heard you talk
+like that?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, it's the holidays!' said Hilary, lazily. 'Besides, it is a shame!
+They would have played with us just as they used to, if it hadn't been
+for that Clarence Tinling.'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' Hazel agreed, 'he hates cricket. I do believe that's the reason
+why he invented this silly army, and talked Jack and Guy into giving up
+everything for it.'</p>
+
+<p>'They haven't any will of their own, poor things!' said Hilary.</p>
+
+<p>'You forget, Hilary,' put in Cecily, 'Tinling is the guest. They ought
+to give way to him.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Hilary, 'it's ridiculous for great boys who have been two
+terms at school to go marching about with swords and guns. Big babies!'</p>
+
+<p>Perhaps there was a little personal feeling at the bottom of this, for
+she had offered herself for enlistment, and had been sternly rejected on
+the ground of her sex.</p>
+
+<p>'I wish he would go, I know that,' said Hazel, making a rather vicious
+little chop at her shoe with her racket; 'those boys talk about nothing
+but their stupid army from morning to night. Uncle Lambert says they
+make him feel quite gunpowdery at lunch. And what do you think is the
+last thing they've done?&mdash;put up a great fence all round their tent, and
+shut themselves up there all day!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_178" id="Page_178">[Pg 178]</a></span></p><p>'Except when they're sentries and hide,' put in Hilary; 'they're always
+jumping up somewhere and wanting you to give the countersign. It isn't
+like home, these holidays!'</p>
+
+<p>'Perhaps,' suggested Cecily, 'it makes things safer, you know.'</p>
+
+<p>'Duffer, Cis!' cried Hilary, contemptuously, for Cecily had appointed
+herself professional peacemaker to the family, and her efforts were
+about as successful as such domestic offices ever are.</p>
+
+<p>'Look out!' cried Hilary, presently; 'they're coming. Don't let's take
+the least notice of them. They hate that more than anything.'</p>
+
+<p>From the shrubbery filed three boys, the first and tallest of whom wore
+an imposing dragoon's helmet with a crimson plume, and carried a
+sabretache and crossbelts, and wore red caps like those of the French
+army; they carried guns on their shoulders.</p>
+
+<p>'Halt! 'Tention! Dis-miss!' shouted the commanding officer, and the army
+broke off with admirable precision.</p>
+
+<p>'Don't be alarmed,' said the General considerately to the three girls;
+'the army is only out on fatigue duty.'</p>
+
+<p>'Then wouldn't the army like to sit down?' suggested Hilary, forgetting
+all about her recent proposal.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_179" id="Page_179">[Pg 179]</a></span></p><p>'Ah, you don't understand,' said General Tinling with some pity. 'It's
+a military term.'</p>
+
+<p>He was a pale, puffy boy, with reddish hair and freckles, who was
+evidently fully alive to the dignity of his position.</p>
+
+<p>'Suppose we let military things alone for a little while,' said Hazel.
+'We want the army to come and play tennis. You will, won't you, Jack and
+Guy? and Cis will umpire&mdash;she likes it.'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't mind a game,' said Jack.</p>
+
+<p>'I'll play, if you like,' added Guy; but he had forgotten that the
+General was a bit of a martinet.</p>
+
+<p>'That's nice discipline,' he said. 'I don't know whether you know it;
+but in some armies you'd be court-martialled for less than that.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, may we, then?' asked Guy a little impatiently.</p>
+
+<p>'No salute now!' cried his superior. 'I shall never make you fellows
+smart. Why, at the Haversacks, last Easter, there were half a dozen of
+us, and we drilled like machines. Of course you mayn't play tennis&mdash;this
+is only a bivouac; and it's over now. Attention! The left wing of the
+force will occupy the shrubbery; the right will push on and blow up the
+gate.</p>
+
+<p>'Which of us is the left wing?' inquired Guy.</p>
+
+<p>'You are, of course.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, all right; only you said Jack was just now,'<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_180" id="Page_180">[Pg 180]</a></span> grumbled Guy, who was
+evidently a little disposed to rebel at being deprived of his tennis.</p>
+
+<p>'Look here,' said the General; 'either let's do the thing thoroughly, or
+not do it at all. It's no pleasure to <i>me</i> to be General, I can tell
+you; and if I can't have perfect discipline in the ranks&mdash;why, we might
+as well drop the army altogether!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, all right,' said Jack, who was a sweet-tempered boy, 'we won't do
+it again.'</p>
+
+<p>And they went off to carry out their separate instructions, Clarence
+Tinling remaining by the cedar.</p>
+
+<p>'I have to be a little sharp now and then,' he explained. 'Why, if I
+didn't keep an iron rule over them, they'd be getting insubordinate in
+no time. You mustn't think I've any objection to their playing tennis,
+or anything of that sort; only discipline must be kept up; though it
+seems severe, perhaps, to you.'</p>
+
+<p>'It doesn't seem to be half bad fun for <i>you</i>, at all events,' said
+Hazel.</p>
+
+<p>'Of course,' added Hilary, whose cheeks were flushed and eyes
+suspiciously bright as she plucked all the blades of grass that were
+within her reach, 'we're glad if you're enjoying being here; but it's a
+little slow for us girls. You might give the army a half-holiday now and
+then.'</p>
+
+<p>'An army, especially a small army, like ours,' said Clarence, grandly,
+'ought to be constantly prepared for action; else it's no use. Then,
+look at the <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_181" id="Page_181">[Pg 181]</a></span>protection it is. Why, we've just built a fortified place
+close to the kitchen garden, where you could all retire to if we were
+attacked; and, properly provisioned, we could hold out for almost any
+time.'</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you,' said Hilary. 'I should feel a good deal safer in the
+box-room. And then, who's going to attack us?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you never know,' replied Clarence; 'but, if they did come, it's
+something to feel we should be able to defend ourselves.'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, Hilary,' Cecily remarked, 'an army would certainly be a great
+convenience then.'</p>
+
+<p>'That would depend on what it did,' said her sister. 'It wouldn't be
+much of a convenience if it ran away.'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't think Jack and Guy would ever do that,' observed Hazel.</p>
+
+<p>'I suppose that means that you think I should?' inquired Clarence, who
+was quick at discovering personal allusions.</p>
+
+<p>'I wasn't thinking about you at all,' said Hazel, with supreme
+indifference; 'we don't know you well enough to say whether you're brave
+or not&mdash;we do know our brothers.'</p>
+
+<p>'There wouldn't be much sense in my being the General if I wasn't the
+bravest, would there?' he demanded.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, as to that, you see,' retorted Hilary, 'we don't see much sense
+in any of it.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_182" id="Page_182">[Pg 182]</a></span></p><p>'Girls can't be expected to see sense in anything,' he said sulkily.</p>
+
+<p>'At all events, no one can be expected to see bravery till there's some
+danger,' said Hazel; 'and there isn't the least!'</p>
+
+<p>'That's all you know about it; but I've something more important to do
+than stay here squabbling. I'm off to see what the army's up to.' And he
+marched off with great pomp.</p>
+
+<p>When he had disappeared, Hilary remarked frankly, 'Isn't he a pig?'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't think it's nice to call our visitors "pigs," Hilary!'
+remonstrated Cecily, 'and he's not really more greedy than most boys.'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't lecture, Cis. I didn't mean he was that kind of pig&mdash;I said he
+was a pig. And he is!' said Hilary, not over lucidly. 'I wonder what
+Jack and Guy can see in him. I thought that when they wrote asking him
+to be invited, that he'd be sure to be such a jolly boy!'</p>
+
+<p>'He may be a jolly boy&mdash;at school,' was all that even the tolerant
+Cecily could find to urge in his favour.</p>
+
+<p>'I believe,' said Hazel, 'that they're not nearly so mad about him as
+they were&mdash;didn't you notice about the tennis just now?'</p>
+
+<p>'He bullies them&mdash;that's what it is,' explained Hilary; 'only with
+talking, I mean, of course, but he talks such a lot, and he will have
+his own way, and,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_183" id="Page_183">[Pg 183]</a></span> if they say anything, he reminds them he's a visitor,
+and ought to be humoured. I wish it was any use getting Uncle Lambert to
+speak to him&mdash;but he's so stupid!'</p>
+
+<p>'Is he, though?' said a lazy voice from behind the cedar.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, Uncle Lambkin!' cried Hilary, 'I didn't know you were there!'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't apologise,' was the answer. 'I know it must be a trial to have an
+uncle on the verge of imbecility&mdash;but bear with me. I am at least
+harmless.'</p>
+
+<p>'Of course we know you're really rather clever,' said Hazel, 'but you
+<i>are</i> stupid about some things&mdash;you never interfere, whatever people
+do!'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't I, really?' said their uncle, as he disposed himself on his back,
+and tilted his hat over his nose; 'you do surprise me! What a mistake
+for a man to make, who has come down for perfect quiet! Whom shall I
+begin to interfere with?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you might snub that horrid Tinling boy, instead of encouraging
+him, as you always do!'</p>
+
+<p>'Encourage him! He's got a fine flow of martial enthusiasm, and a good
+supply of military terms, and I listen when he gives me long accounts of
+thrilling engagements, when he came out uncommonly strong&mdash;and the
+enemy, so far as I can gather, never came out at all. I'm passive,
+because I can't help myself; and then he amuses me in his way&mdash;that's
+all.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_184" id="Page_184">[Pg 184]</a></span></p><p>'Do you believe he's brave, uncle?'</p>
+
+<p>'I only know that I saw him kill two wasps with his teaspoon,' was the
+reply. 'They don't award the Victoria Cross for it&mdash;but it's a thing I
+couldn't have done myself.'</p>
+
+<p>'I should hope not!' exclaimed Hilary; 'but everybody knows you're a
+coward,' she added (she did not intend this remark to be taken
+seriously), 'and you're awfully lazy. Still, there are some things you
+might do!'</p>
+
+<p>'If that means fielding long-leg till tea-time, I respectfully disagree.
+Irreverent girls, have you never been taught that a digesting uncle is a
+very solemn and sacred thing?'</p>
+
+<p>'Now you are going to be idiotic again! But as to cricket&mdash;why, you must
+know that we never get a game now! And next summer I shall be too old to
+play!'</p>
+
+<p>'I <i>never</i> mean to be too old for cricket,' said Hilary, with
+conviction; 'but we've had none for weeks, uncle, positive weeks!'</p>
+
+<p>'Quite right, too!' observed Uncle Lambert, sleepily. 'Not a game for
+girls&mdash;only spoil your hands&mdash;do you think I want a set of nieces with
+paws like so many glovers' signs?'</p>
+
+<p>'That's utter nonsense,' said Hazel, calmly, 'because we always play in
+gloves. Mother makes us. At least, when we did play. Now the boys will
+only play soldiers, and, if they do happen to be <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_185" id="Page_185">[Pg 185]</a></span>inclined for a set at
+tennis, Clarence comes up and orders them off as pickets or outposts, or
+something!'</p>
+
+<p>'But he's not Bismarck or Boulanger, is he? I always understood this was
+a free country.'</p>
+
+<p>'You know what Guy and Jack are&mdash;they can't bear their visitor to think
+he isn't welcome.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, they seem to have made him feel very much at home&mdash;but it isn't
+my business; if they choose to declare the house in a state of siege,
+and turn the garden into a seat of war, I can't help it&mdash;I'd rather they
+wouldn't, but it's your mother's affair, not mine!'</p>
+
+<p>And he closed the discussion by lighting a cigarette, and relapsing into
+a contented silence.</p>
+
+<p>Uncle Lambert was short and stout, with a round red face, a heavy auburn
+moustache, and little green eyes which never seemed to notice anything.
+His nieces were fond of him, though they often wished he would pay them
+the occasional compliment of talking sensibly; but he never did, and he
+spent all his time at The Gables in elaborately doing nothing at all.</p>
+
+<p>Clarence Tinling had gone off in a decided huff&mdash;so much so indeed that
+he left his devoted army to carry out their rather misty man&oelig;uvres
+without any help from him. He was beginning to find a falling-off in
+their docility of late, which was no doubt owing to their sisters; it
+was excessively annoying to him that those girls should be so difficult
+to convince of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_186" id="Page_186">[Pg 186]</a></span> the protective value of a fortress, and especially that
+they should decline to take his own superior nerve and courage for
+granted. And the worst of it was, nothing but some imminent danger was
+ever likely to convince them, such were their prejudice and
+narrow-mindedness.</p>
+
+<p>Later that afternoon the family assembled for tea in the cool, shady
+dining-room; Mrs. Jolliffe, with a gentle anxiety on her usually placid
+face, sat at the head (Colonel Jolliffe was away shooting in the North
+just then). 'Where are all the boys?' she said, looking round the table.
+'Why don't they come in?'</p>
+
+<p>'It's no use asking us, mother,' said Hilary, 'we see so very little of
+them ever.'</p>
+
+<p>'Very likely they are washing their hands,' said her mother.</p>
+
+<p>'So <i>like</i> them!' murmured Uncle Lambert in confidence to his tea-cake.
+'But here's the noble General, at all events. Well, Field Marshal, what
+have you done with the Standing Army?'</p>
+
+<p>Tinling addressed himself to his hostess. 'Oh, Mrs. Jolliffe, I'm so
+sorry I was late, but I had just to run round to the stables for a
+minute. Oh, the other two? They're on duty&mdash;they're guarding the camp.
+In fact, I can't stay here very long myself.'</p>
+
+<p>'But the poor dear boys must have their tea!' cried Mrs. Jolliffe.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you know,' said their veteran officer, as he helped himself to
+the marmalade, 'I don't think<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_187" id="Page_187">[Pg 187]</a></span> a little roughing it is at all a bad
+thing for them&mdash;teaches them that a soldier's life is not all jam.'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' said Hazel, 'the General seems to get most of that.'</p>
+
+<p>All Clarence said was: 'I'll trouble one of you girls for the tea-cake.'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't think it's fair that the poor army should "rough," as you call
+it, while you stuff, Clarence,' said Hazel, indignantly. 'Mustn't they
+come in to tea, mother? It is such nonsense!'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, dear, run and call them in,' said Mrs. Jolliffe. 'I can't let my
+boys go without their meals, Clarence, it's so bad for them.'</p>
+
+<p>'It's not discipline,' said the chief; 'still, if they must come, you
+had better take them this permit from me.' And he scribbled a line on a
+scrap of paper, which he handed to Hazel, who received it with the
+utmost disdain.</p>
+
+<p>Hazel crossed the lawn and over a little rustic bridge to the kitchen
+garden and hothouses, beyond which was the paddock, where the fortress
+had been erected. It was a very imposing construction, built, with some
+help from the village carpenter, of portions of some disused fencing.
+The stockade had loopholes in it, and above the top she could see a
+fluttering flag and the point of a tent. Jack was perched up on a kind
+of look-out, and Guy was pacing solemnly before the covered entrance
+with a musket of very mild aspect over his shoulder.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_188" id="Page_188">[Pg 188]</a></span></p><p>'Who goes there?' he called out, some time after recognising her.</p>
+
+<p>Hazel vouchsafed no direct reply to this challenge. 'You're to come in
+to tea <i>directly</i>,' she announced in her most peremptory tone.</p>
+
+<p>'Advance, and give the countersign,' said the sentinel.</p>
+
+<p>'Don't be a donkey!' returned Hazel, tossing back her long brown hair
+impatiently.</p>
+
+<p>Guy levelled his firearm. It is exasperating when a sister can't enter
+into the spirit of the thing better than that. Who ever heard of a
+sentry being told, on challenging, 'not to be a donkey'? 'My orders are
+to fire on all suspicious persons,' he informed her.</p>
+
+<p>Hazel stopped both her ears. 'No, Guy, please&mdash;it makes me jump so.'</p>
+
+<p>'There's no cap on,' said he.</p>
+
+<p>'Then there's a ramrod, or a pea, or something horrid,' she objected;
+'do turn it the other way.'</p>
+
+<p>'Hazel's all right, Guy,' said Jack, in rebuke of this excessive zeal;
+'we can let her pass.'</p>
+
+<p>'As if I wanted to pass!' exclaimed Hazel. 'I only came to bring you
+back to tea; and if you're afraid to go without leave, there's a
+permission from Clarence for you.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh! come in and have a look now you're here,' said the garrison more
+hospitably. 'You can't think how jolly the inside is.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_189" id="Page_189">[Pg 189]</a></span></p><p>'Well, if I must,' she said; though, as a matter of fact, she was
+exceedingly curious to see the interior of the stronghold.</p>
+
+<p>'It's like the ones in "Masterman Ready" and "Treasure Island," you
+see,' explained Jack, proudly. 'And it's pierced for musketry, too; we
+could open a withering fire on besiegers before they could come near
+us.'</p>
+
+<p>'They would have to be rather stupid to want to besiege this, wouldn't
+they?' said Hazel.</p>
+
+<p>'I don't see that&mdash;besiegers must besiege something. And it is snug,
+isn't it, now?'</p>
+
+<p>Hazel was secretly much impressed. In the centre of the enclosure was
+the commander's tent, with a lantern fixed at the pole for night
+watches; and rugs and carpets were strewn about; at one of the angles of
+the palisading was the look-out&mdash;an elaborate erection of old wine-cases
+and egg-boxes&mdash;on the top of which was fixed a seven-and-sixpenny
+telescope that commanded the surrounding country for quite a hundred
+yards.</p>
+
+<p>She was not the person, however, to go into raptures; she merely smiled
+a rather teasing little smile, and said, 'Mar-vellous!' but somehow,
+whatever sarcasm underlay this was accepted by both boys as a tribute.</p>
+
+<p>'You can see now,' said Guy, in a reasonable tone, 'that there wouldn't
+have been room here for all you girls&mdash;now, would there?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_190" id="Page_190">[Pg 190]</a></span></p><p>'Girls are always in the way&mdash;everywhere,' said Hazel, with a
+reproachful inflection which was quite lost upon her brothers.</p>
+
+<p>'I knew you'd be sensible about it,' said Jack; 'you can't think what
+fun we have in here&mdash;especially at night, when the lantern's lit. Hallo!
+there's some one calling.'</p>
+
+<p>A shrill whistle sounded from the kitchen garden, and, a moment after, a
+stone came flying over the stockade, and was stopped by the canvas of
+the tent.</p>
+
+<p>'That's cool cheek!' said Jack; 'get up and reconnoitre, Guy&mdash;quick!'</p>
+
+<p>Guy mounted the scaffold, and brought the telescope to bear upon the
+immediate neighbourhood with admirable coolness and science&mdash;but no
+particular result.</p>
+
+<p>'We shall have to scour the bush and see if we can find any traces of
+the enemy,' said he with infinite relish.</p>
+
+<p>'Was that the stone?' said Hazel, pointing to one that lay at the foot
+of the fence; 'because there seems to be some paper wrapped round it.'</p>
+
+<p>'So there is!' said Jack, proceeding to unfold it. Presently he
+exclaimed, 'I <i>say</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>'What is it now?' asked Hazel.</p>
+
+<p>'Nothing for you&mdash;it's private!' said Jack, mysteriously. 'Here, Guy,
+come down and look at this.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_191" id="Page_191">[Pg 191]</a></span></p><p>Guy read it and whistled. 'We must report this to the General at once,'
+he said gravely.</p>
+
+<p>Both boys were very solemn, and yet had a certain novel air of satisfied
+importance.</p>
+
+<p>'Shall we tell her?' asked Guy.</p>
+
+<p>'She must know it some time,' returned Jack; 'we'll break it by
+degrees.&mdash;We've just had notice that we're going to be attacked by Red
+Indians, Hazel; don't be alarmed.'</p>
+
+<p>'I'll try not to be,' she said, conquering a very strong inclination to
+laugh. She saw that they took it quite seriously; and, though she had at
+once suspected that some one in the village was playing them a trick,
+she did not choose to enlighten them. Hazel had a malicious desire to
+see what the General would do. 'I don't believe he will like the idea at
+all,' she said to herself. 'What fun it will be!'</p>
+
+<p>Hazel's expectations seemed about to be fulfilled; for already she could
+hear steps on the plank of the little bridge, and in another minute the
+General himself entered the fortress.</p>
+
+<p>'I say, you fellows,' he began, 'this is too bad&mdash;no one on guard, and a
+girl inside! Why, she might be a spy for anything you could tell!'</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you, Clarence!' said Hazel; for this insinuation was rather
+trying to a person of her dignity.</p>
+
+<p>'I say, General,' began Jack, 'never mind about<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_192" id="Page_192">[Pg 192]</a></span> rowing us now; we've
+some queer news to report. This has just fallen into our hands.'</p>
+
+<p>Hazel watched Tinling closely as he read the paper. It was grimy, and
+printed in lead pencil, and contained these words:&mdash;'<span class="smcap">Be on the lukout.
+Red Ingians on the Worpath. I Herd Them Saying They ment to atack yure
+fort at nitefal. From a frend.</span>'</p>
+
+<p>She was soon compelled to own that she had done him a great injustice.
+He was certainly as far as possible from betraying the slightest fear;
+on the contrary, his eye seemed actually to brighten with satisfaction.
+He behaved exactly as all heroes in books of adventure do on such
+occasions&mdash;he went through it twice carefully, and then inquired at what
+time the warning had arrived.</p>
+
+<p>'About five minutes ago. Round a stone,' answered Guy, with true
+military conciseness.</p>
+
+<p>'This will be a bad business,' observed the General, his face
+brightening with the joy of battle. 'We have no time to spare&mdash;we must
+give these demons a lesson they will not forget!' (this was out of the
+books). 'Look to your arms, my men, and see that we are provisioned for
+a siege (you might get the cook to give us some of that shortbread, and
+the rest of the cake we had at tea, Private Jack). We cannot tell to
+what straits we may be reduced.'</p>
+
+<p>'Then,' inquired Hazel, demurely, 'you mean to stay here and fight
+them?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_193" id="Page_193">[Pg 193]</a></span></p><p>'To the last gasp!' said the General.</p>
+
+<p>Hazel liked him better then than she had done since his first arrival.</p>
+
+<p>'He really is a plucky boy after all,' she thought. 'I wonder if it will
+last?'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h2><a name="ACT_THE_SECOND" id="ACT_THE_SECOND"></a>ACT THE SECOND</h2>
+
+<h3>WHERE IS THE ARMY?</h3>
+
+<p>The General's self-possession and resource were indeed remarkable.</p>
+
+<p>'We ought to have a cannon,' he said; 'there's a big roll of matting
+somewhere in the house. If we got that, and widened a loophole, and
+shoved it through, it would look just like the muzzle of a cannon in the
+dark.'</p>
+
+<p>'Would that frighten a Red Indian much?' asked Hazel.</p>
+
+<p>'Not if he knew what it was, perhaps; but who's going to tell him? Jack,
+just run up to the house, like a good fellow, and see if you can find
+it, will you? You can go with him, Guy.'</p>
+
+<p>'You seem rather to like the idea of being attacked,' said Hazel, when
+she and Clarence were alone together. He was gratified to notice the new
+friendliness in her voice.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you see,' he explained loftily, 'I don't<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_194" id="Page_194">[Pg 194]</a></span> suppose I'm pluckier
+than most people, but it just happens that I'm not afraid of Red
+Indians, that's all; when I saw all those at Buffalo Bill's I wasn't
+even excited: it's constitutional, I fancy.' He always modelled his talk
+a good deal upon books, and a crisis like this naturally brought out his
+largest language.</p>
+
+<p>'I'd better see you safe back to the house, I think,' he added; 'I don't
+expect them for an hour yet, but you can never depend on savages&mdash;they
+might be lurking about the grounds already, for what we know.'</p>
+
+<p>And, although Hazel had her own private ideas about the reality of the
+danger, she was struck by his coolness and courage, for which, whether
+justified or not by the occasion, she was quite fair-minded enough to
+give him due credit.</p>
+
+<p>Meanwhile, the other two boys, bursting with excitement, had rushed up
+to the verandah, under which their mother and uncle were sitting.</p>
+
+<p>'Mother! Uncle Lambert! What do you think? Our camp is going to be
+attacked this very night by Indians!'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, dears,' said Mrs. Jolliffe, serenely; 'but have you had your teas
+yet?'</p>
+
+<p>Trifles such as these harrow the martial soul more than conflicts.</p>
+
+<p>'But, mother, did you hear what we said? The fort is to be stormed by
+Red Indians!'</p>
+
+<p>'Very well, dears, so long as you don't make too much noise,' was the
+sole comment of this most<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_195" id="Page_195">[Pg 195]</a></span> provokingly placid lady. What she ought to
+have done was, of course, to throw down her work, raise her eyes to the
+clouds, clasp her hands, and observe, in an agitated tone, 'Heaven
+protect us! We are lost!' But few mothers are capable of really rising
+to emergencies of this kind.</p>
+
+<p>Hilary and Cecily had been playing tennis, and, overhearing the alarming
+news, came up to the steps of the verandah. 'Did you say Red Indians
+were coming here?'</p>
+
+<p>Uncle Lambert shook his head lugubriously. 'I always warned your
+father,' he remarked; 'but he <i>would</i> come to live in Berkshire.'</p>
+
+<p>'Why?' inquired Cecily. 'Is Berkshire a bad place for Red Indians,
+uncle?'</p>
+
+<p>'I should say it was one of the worst places in all Europe!' he said
+solemnly.</p>
+
+<p>Both Hilary and Cecily had heard and read a good deal about Red Indians
+lately, and had also, with their brothers, visited the American
+Exhibition, so that it did not strike either of them as unlikely just
+then that there should be a few scattered about in England, just as
+gipsies are.</p>
+
+<p>'But what are you going to do about it?' they asked their brother.</p>
+
+<p>'Lick 'em, of course!' said Guy. 'Now you see that an army is some use,
+after all.'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't be taken alive, there's good boys,' advised their frivolous
+uncle, who seemed still unable to realise<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_196" id="Page_196">[Pg 196]</a></span> the extreme gravity of the
+occasion. 'Sell your lives as dearly as possible.'</p>
+
+<p>'What is the use of telling them that, uncle?' exclaimed Cecily. 'They
+wouldn't get the money; and do you think any of <i>us</i> would touch it? How
+can you talk in that horrid way? Jack and Guy, don't go to that camp.
+Let the Indians have it, if they want to; you can soon build another.'</p>
+
+<p>'You don't understand,' said Jack, impatiently. 'We can't have a lot of
+Red Indians in our camp&mdash;it wouldn't be safe for you.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I shall go and speak to Clarence,' she cried. 'I'm sure he won't
+want to fight them.' And she ran down to the end of the lawn, where he
+could be seen returning with Hazel.</p>
+
+<p>'I want to speak to you quite alone,' she said. 'No, Hazel, it's a
+secret,' and she drew him aside.</p>
+
+<p>'Clarence,' she said, and her blue eyes were dark with fear, 'tell
+me&mdash;are the Indians really coming?'</p>
+
+<p>'You can judge for yourself,' he said, and gave her the paper. 'We've
+just had this thrown over the stockade. It seems to have been written by
+somebody who is in their secrets.'</p>
+
+<p>'How badly Red Indians do spell!' said Cecily, shuddering as she read.</p>
+
+<p>'It may be a white man's writing,' he said; 'perhaps a prisoner, or a
+confederate who repents.'</p>
+
+<p>'But, Clarence, dear,' entreated Cecily (ten minutes<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_197" id="Page_197">[Pg 197]</a></span> ago she would not
+have added the epithet), 'you won't stay out and sit up for them, will
+you?'</p>
+
+<p>'Do you think we're a set of cowards?' he demanded grandly.</p>
+
+<p>'Not you, Clarence; but&mdash;but Jack and Guy are not very big boys, are
+they? I mean, they're a little too young to fight full-sized Indians.'</p>
+
+<p>'There will be all sorts of sized Indians, I expect,' said Clarence. 'Of
+course, I don't say they'll come. They may think discretion's the better
+part of valour when they find we're prepared; but I must say I
+anticipate an attack myself.'</p>
+
+<p>'I wish you would do without Jack and Guy. Couldn't you?' suggested
+Cecily.</p>
+
+<p>His eyes gleamed. 'Cecily,' he said, 'tell me the worst&mdash;the army are
+getting in a funk?'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' she cried; and then she resolved to sacrifice their reputation for
+their safety. 'At least, they haven't said anything; but I'm sure they'd
+feel more comfortable in the drawing-room. Can't you order them to stay
+and guard us? You're General.'</p>
+
+<p>'And I am to face the foe alone?' he cried. 'Well, I am older than them'
+(I must decline to be responsible for the grammar of the characters of
+this story). 'I have lived my life&mdash;I shall be the less missed.... Let
+it be as you say.'</p>
+
+<p>All this was strictly according to the books, and he enjoyed himself
+immensely.</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you, dear, dear Clarence. I'd no idea<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_198" id="Page_198">[Pg 198]</a></span> you were so noble and
+brave. Try not to let those Indians hit you.'</p>
+
+<p>'I cannot answer for the future,' he said; 'but since you wish it I will
+do my best.'</p>
+
+<p>After all there was some good in girls. Here was one who said exactly
+the right things, without needing any prompting whatever.</p>
+
+<p>Cecily hunted up Jack and Guy, who were poking about in the house.
+'You're not to guard the stockade,' she announced, with ill-concealed
+triumph.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, aren't we, though?' said Guy; 'who says so? Not mother!'</p>
+
+<p>'No&mdash;Clarence; he said I was to tell you to go on duty in the
+drawing-room.'</p>
+
+<p>'What bosh!' said Guy. 'As if any Indians would come there! I don't care
+what Clarence says, I shall go in the stockade!'</p>
+
+<p>'So shall I! 'said Jack. 'Now let's get that piece of matting, and go
+down sharp&mdash;the evening star's out already.'</p>
+
+<p>Poor Cecily was in despair; what was to be done when they were so
+obstinate as this?</p>
+
+<p>'I know where there's some beautiful matting,' she said.</p>
+
+<p>'Where? Tell us, quick!'</p>
+
+<p>'Come with me, and I'll show you.' She led the way along a corridor to
+the wing where the billiard-room was. 'Wait till I see if it's there
+still,' she said,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_199" id="Page_199">[Pg 199]</a></span> and went into the billiard-room and looked around.
+'Yes, it <i>is</i> there,' she told them as she came out.</p>
+
+<p>'I don't see it, Cecily; where?' they cried from within.</p>
+
+<p>Cecily shut the door softly, and turned the key (which she had managed
+to abstract on entering) in the outer lock.</p>
+
+<p>'It's on the floor,' she cried through the keyhole; 'I didn't tell a
+story&mdash;and don't be angry, boys, dear, it's all for your good!'</p>
+
+<p>Then, without waiting to hear their indignant outcry, she scudded along
+the corridor and down the staircase, with the sounds of muffled shouts
+and kicks growing fainter behind her.</p>
+
+<p>'I don't mind so much now,' she thought; 'they'll be awfully angry when
+they come out&mdash;but the Indians will have gone by that time!'</p>
+
+<p>Clarence had already retreated to his stronghold when she entered the
+drawing-room.</p>
+
+<p>Everything seemed as usual; Uncle Lambert, in evening dress, was playing
+desultory snatches from <i>Ruddigore</i>. Mrs. Jolliffe came down presently,
+and he took her in to dinner with one of his tiresome jokes. No one
+seemed at all anxious about poor Tinling, fighting all alone down in the
+paddock.</p>
+
+<p>She curled herself up on a settee by one of the open windows, and
+listened, trying to catch the sound of Indian yells. 'Hazel,' she said
+anxiously, 'do you think the Indians will hurt Tinling?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_200" id="Page_200">[Pg 200]</a></span></p><p>Hazel gave a little laugh. 'I don't think the army's in any very great
+danger, Cis,' she replied.</p>
+
+<p>'Hazel doesn't believe there are any Indians at all,' explained Hilary.</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Cecily, softly, 'I've kept the army out of danger, whether
+there are or not!'</p>
+
+<p>But she felt relieved by her sisters' evident tranquillity, and
+by-and-by, when Mrs. Jolliffe came in from the dining-room and settled
+down with her embroidery as if there were not the least chance of a
+savage coming whooping in the open window, Cecily almost forgot her
+fears.</p>
+
+<p>They came back in full force, however, as, a little later on, she heard
+a quick, light step on the gravel outside, and started with a little
+scream of terror. 'Don't tell them where the army are!' she cried; and
+then she saw that her alarm was needless, for it was the gallant General
+who stepped into the room. Hazel looked up from the album which she was
+making for a children's hospital, Hilary threw away her book, Mrs.
+Jolliffe had ceased to embroider, but that was because she was
+peacefully dozing.</p>
+
+<p>'Victory!' said Clarence, waving his sword.</p>
+
+<p>'Then they did come?' cried Cecily, triumphantly.</p>
+
+<p>'Rather!' he replied. 'I couldn't tell how many there were, but they
+were overcome with panic at the first discharge. I fancy <i>these</i> Indians
+had never heard firearms before.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_201" id="Page_201">[Pg 201]</a></span></p><p>'How funny that we shouldn't have heard any now!' remarked Hazel,
+resting her chin on her palms, while her grey eyes had a rather mocking
+sparkle in them.</p>
+
+<p>'Not funny at all,' he said, 'considering the wind was the other way. I
+let them come on, and then poured a volley into the thickest part of
+their ranks&mdash;that made them waver, and then I made a sortie, and you
+should have just seen them scuttle!'</p>
+
+<p>'I wish I had,' said Hazel, as she pasted another Christmas card into
+her album. 'And weren't you wounded at all?'</p>
+
+<p>'A mere scratch,' he said lightly (which is what book-heroes always
+say).</p>
+
+<p>'It looks as if you had been amongst the gooseberry-bushes,' said
+Hilary, examining his arm as he pulled up his sleeve.</p>
+
+<p>'Does it? Well, I only know it's lucky for me there were no poisoned
+arrows.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oughtn't you to have it burnt, though, Clarence, just in case?'
+suggested Cecily, in all good faith; 'there's sure to be a red-hot poker
+in the kitchen.'</p>
+
+<p>But Clarence was very decidedly of opinion that such a precaution was
+not necessary.</p>
+
+<p>'And you're quite sure the Indians are all gone?' she asked.</p>
+
+<p>'There isn't one of 'em within miles,' he said confidently, 'I'll answer
+for that.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_202" id="Page_202">[Pg 202]</a></span></p><p>'Then come upstairs with me, and we'll let the army out. They'll be in
+such a temper!'</p>
+
+<p>They found the two boys, who had tired of kicking and shouting by that
+time, sitting gloomily on the long seats in the dark.</p>
+
+<p>'Guy, dear&mdash;Jack,' said Cecily, timidly, 'you can come out now. Clarence
+has beaten the Indians.'</p>
+
+<p>'Without us?' groaned Guy. 'Cecily, I'll never speak to you again!
+Tinling, I&mdash;we&mdash;you don't think we funked, do you? She locked us up
+here!'</p>
+
+<p>All the General's native magnanimity came out now.</p>
+
+<p>'We won't say any more about it,' he said. 'It was rather a close shave,
+with only one man to do it all. But, there, I managed somehow, and
+perhaps it was just as well you weren't there. The first rush was no
+joke, I can tell you.'</p>
+
+<p>Jack punched his own head with both hands.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, it's too bad!' he said&mdash;he was almost in tears. 'They'll all think
+we deserted you! Did you kill many of them, Tinling?'</p>
+
+<p>'I didn't see any corpses,' he replied; 'but I shouldn't be surprised if
+some of them died when they got home.'</p>
+
+<p>'They may come again to-morrow night,' said Jack, more cheerfully.</p>
+
+<p>'Not much fear of that&mdash;they've had their lesson. They were seized with
+utter panic.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_203" id="Page_203">[Pg 203]</a></span></p><p>'Which way did they go?' asked Guy, evidently bent on pursuing them.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, in all directions. But you wouldn't catch them up now; they ran too
+fast for me even!'</p>
+
+<p>'Then I shall go to bed,' said the entire army, in great depression. 'It
+is a shame we couldn't be there. Good-night, General.' And, pointedly
+ignoring poor Cecily, they marched off to their quarters. She looked
+wistfully after them.</p>
+
+<p>'They'll never forgive me&mdash;I know they won't!' she said to Tinling.</p>
+
+<p>'Don't you mind,' he said, 'you acted very wisely. And, after all, these
+raw young troops can never be depended on under fire, you know&mdash;I mean,
+under arrows.'</p>
+
+<p>Cecily drew herself up a little haughtily.</p>
+
+<p>'I locked them in because I didn't want them to get hurt,' she said,
+'not because I thought they'd be afraid.'</p>
+
+<p>Uncle Lambert did not hear about the result of the engagement until the
+following day, but then, to make up for any delay, he heard a good deal
+about it. Even Clarence was not quite prepared for the enthusiasm he
+showed.</p>
+
+<p>'Splendid, my boy, splendid!' he kept repeating, while he hit him rather
+hard on the back; 'you're a hero. A grateful country ought to give you
+the Bath for it. I shall take care this affair is generally known.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_204" id="Page_204">[Pg 204]</a></span></p><p>And the poor army looked on with hot cheeks and envious eyes. But for
+Cecily, they might have been heroes, too!</p>
+
+<p>Even Hazel seemed to have understood that a really brilliant victory had
+been achieved; she brought Tinling a magnificent flag of pink glazed
+calico, on which she had painted in crimson letters: 'Indians' Terror.'</p>
+
+<p>'I did not think of making the motto "Seven at one blow,"' she said,
+with a mischievous dimple.</p>
+
+<p>'I like the other best,' said the General, unsuspectingly.</p>
+
+<p>Jack and Guy went down to the camp as usual, but for some time they were
+in very low spirits, in spite of their commander's well-meant efforts to
+raise them.</p>
+
+<p>'You'll do better next time,' he said kindly.</p>
+
+<p>'But we've told you over and over again how it was!' they would exclaim.</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, I know, I know. It's all right. I'm not complaining: I never
+expected you to be as cool as I was, your first time.' But even this did
+not seem to console the army to any large extent; they hunched their
+shoulders and kicked pebbles about with great apparent interest.</p>
+
+<p>The fact was, they could not help seeing that they had lost their
+prestige. It was true that their mother and elder sister at least (in
+spite of the flag) did not seem to treat the past danger with all the
+seriousness<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_205" id="Page_205">[Pg 205]</a></span> it deserved. It even struck Jack and Guy sometimes that
+they were under the delusion that the whole thing had been only a new
+development of the game. But as the General said: 'Even if that were so,
+it was kinder not to undeceive them. He certainly was contented to leave
+them in their error; he knew well enough what he had had to go
+through&mdash;he did not like even now to think of his despair when he found
+he would have to face the danger all alone.'</p>
+
+<p>He was always making the army writhe by little unintentional reminders
+of this kind, and they had cruel misgivings that Uncle Lambert, though
+he was always quite kind and encouraging, did not in his heart believe
+that their unfortunate absence in the hour of peril was quite an
+accident on their part.</p>
+
+<p>How they longed for an opportunity of wiping out their disgrace, and how
+their hearts sank when Tinling, from the depths of his experience,
+declared it very improbable that the attack would ever again be renewed.
+In the school-stories, the good boy who refuses to fight when he is
+kicked, and is sent to Coventry as a coward, always gets a speedy chance
+to clear his character. Someone (generally the very boy who kicked him)
+falls into a mill-stream, or a convenient horse runs away, or else a mad
+but considerate bull comes into the playground&mdash;and the good boy is
+always at hand to dive, or hang on to the bridle and be dragged several
+yards in the dust, or slowly retreat backwards, throwing down first his
+hat<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_206" id="Page_206">[Pg 206]</a></span> and then his coat to amuse and detain the infuriated bull.</p>
+
+<p>But out of stories, unfortunately, as even Jack and Guy dimly perceived,
+things are not always arranged so satisfactorily. They might have to
+wait for weeks, perhaps months or years, before Uncle Lambert fell into
+the fish-pond&mdash;and, even if he did, he could probably swim better than
+they could. Then they were neither of them sure that they could
+successfully stop a runaway horse, or a maniac bull, without a little
+more practice than they had had as yet.</p>
+
+<p>However, Fortune was kind, and took pity on them in a most unexpected
+manner. For one morning, soon after breakfast, when Hazel was practising
+in the music-room, and Hilary and Cecily feeding their rabbits, Jack
+came up in a highly-excited state of mind to the verandah where his
+officer was seated doing nothing in particular. 'General,' he said, with
+a very creditable salute, 'do come down to the camp at once.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, bother!' said the veteran warrior, who had, by the way, shown
+rather a tendency to rest on his laurels of late.</p>
+
+<p>'No, but it isn't humbug, really,' protested Jack; 'it's something
+you'll like awfully.'</p>
+
+<p>The General marched down in a very stately manner; it would have been
+undignified to run, eager as he was to get down to the stockade,
+thinking it not<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_207" id="Page_207">[Pg 207]</a></span> unlikely that Lintoft, the carpenter, really had found
+time to make a cannon for them after all, or, at the very least, that
+there would be some change in the internal arrangements of the
+stronghold which it would be his duty as superior officer to criticise,
+if not condemn.</p>
+
+<p>Now it must be explained here that, during the last two or three days,
+the outside wall of the fort had been placarded with various bills, all
+glorying in the recent repulse of the enemy by a single-handed defender,
+and containing most insulting reflections on the courage of Red Indians
+as a race; while, in case they might not have enough knowledge of
+English to understand these taunts, they were accompanied by sketches
+which were certainly scathing enough to infuriate the least susceptible
+savage.</p>
+
+<p>To do Clarence justice, they were not due to any elation on his part,
+but had all been executed by the army in the wild hope that they might
+thus stir up the foe to a fresh demonstration, when they themselves
+might recover their lost spurs.</p>
+
+<p>These placards, as Clarence found on reaching the stockade, had been
+scrawled over with a kind of red and yellow paint so as to be quite
+illegible.</p>
+
+<p>'Ochre,' said Guy; 'but that's not the best of it, for we found this
+pinned with an arrow to one of the posts.' And he produced a thin strip
+of white bark, on which were writing and drawings in crimson. 'They must
+have done it with their own blood,'<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_208" id="Page_208">[Pg 208]</a></span> commented Jack, with great gusto;
+'but read it&mdash;do read it.'</p>
+
+<p>Clarence did not need a second invitation to read the document, which
+was as follows:&mdash;</p>
+
+<blockquote><p class="center">'<span class="smcap">Wah Na Sa Pash Boo</span> (<span class="smcap">Yellow Vulture</span>),</p>
+
+<p class="center"><i>Chief of Black Bogallala Tribe, to the Great White Chief, Tin
+Lin</i>, <span class="smcap">Defiance</span>.</p>
+
+<p>'The wigwam of Yellow Vulture wants but one ornament&mdash;the scalp of
+the white chief. Yellow Vulture has seen the taunts calling the red
+warriors "women with the hearts of deer." He will show the Paleface
+that the anger of the dusky ones is a big heap-lot terrible. When
+the sun has set behind the hills, and the stars light their
+watch-fires, then will Yellow Vulture and his braves be at hand.
+The scalp of the Paleface shall adorn the tepee of the Red Man.</p>
+
+<p class="center">'<span class="smcap">Wah-Wah</span>!'</p></blockquote>
+
+<p>In order that there should be no possible mistake about the intention,
+the message was supplemented by a rude representation of the process of
+scalping, evidently the work of a practised hand.</p>
+
+<p>'Didn't I tell you we had something jolly to show you!' exclaimed Jack.</p>
+
+<p>But joy, or some equally powerful emotion, rendered the General
+incapable of speaking for several moments.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_209" id="Page_209">[Pg 209]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="ACT_THE_THIRD" id="ACT_THE_THIRD"></a>ACT THE THIRD</h2>
+
+<h3>WHERE IS THE GENERAL?</h3>
+
+<p>It was some little time before Clarence Tinling gave any opinion upon
+this bloodthirsty document. He turned exceedingly red, and examined it
+suspiciously on both sides. It seemed as if he did not altogether
+welcome this second opportunity for distinguishing himself. When he
+spoke it was with a sort of angry anxiety.</p>
+
+<p>'You think yourselves very clever, I dare say,' he said; 'but you
+needn't fancy you'll take me in! Come, you had better say so at
+once&mdash;you did this yourselves? It is not half bad&mdash;I will say that for
+it.'</p>
+
+<p>'That we didn't,' cried Guy. 'Why, just look at it, Tinling. Any one
+could see that it's an Indian's doing. No, it's all right; they really
+are coming.'</p>
+
+<p>'It's all skittles, I tell you,' said Clarence, still more angrily,
+though he was paler again now. 'What should Indians come here for?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, he says why, there,' said Jack, 'and they came the other
+evening.'</p>
+
+<p>Clarence's colour rose again. 'That's different,' he said; 'I mean, it's
+not the same tribe.'</p>
+
+<p>'No, these are Black Bogallalas,' said Jack. 'What were the first ones,
+Tinling?'</p>
+
+<p>'I didn't ask them,' said the General shortly.</p>
+
+<p>'How many braves should you think Wah Na<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_210" id="Page_210">[Pg 210]</a></span> What's-his-name will bring?'
+asked Guy. 'As many as came the other evening? How many did come the
+first time?'</p>
+
+<p>'Do you think I had nothing better to do than count?' he retorted. 'Is
+there anything else you would like to know?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, we'll hang out the lantern to-night, and watch how many come
+inside its rays,' said Jack, with a briskness which displeased his
+chief.</p>
+
+<p>'You wouldn't be quite so jolly cheerful over it if you knew what it was
+like!' he grumbled.</p>
+
+<p>'Why not?' said Guy. 'You beat the others easily enough by yourself, and
+we shall be three this time.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, it's all very fine to talk,' retorted the General; 'but we shall
+see what your mother and uncle say about it. They&mdash;they may think we
+ought not to take any notice of it.'</p>
+
+<p>Jack's eyes opened wide at this. 'Not take any notice of an attack by
+Black Bogallalas! I don't see how we can very well help noticing it!'</p>
+
+<p>'It all depends on what Mrs. Jolliffe says,' replied the conscientious
+General. 'I'm only a visitor here, and it wouldn't be the right thing
+for me to lead you into danger without leave.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you weren't so particular the first time the Indians came!'
+remarked Guy.</p>
+
+<p>'Will you shut up about that first time!' the Commander burst out, in
+exasperation; 'it's the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_211" id="Page_211">[Pg 211]</a></span> second time now&mdash;that is, if it isn't all
+humbug. That's what I mean to find out first&mdash;you stay here till I come
+back, will you?'</p>
+
+<p>Taking the strip of bark with him, he went slowly up to the house. He
+had an uneasy feeling that the Indian's challenge was genuine enough,
+but he still hoped to have it pronounced a forgery. This may seem
+strange indeed to some, considering the courage of which he had already
+given proof, but I do not wish to make any further mystery, particularly
+as most of my readers will probably have already guessed the secret of
+this apparent contrast.</p>
+
+<p>The fact is, then, that Clarence Tinling had the best of reasons for
+being cool and courageous on the previous occasion. Those Indians were
+entirely imaginary; he had written the warning himself, and instructed
+the coachman's boy to throw it over the stockade; the attack on the fort
+and the brilliant victory were an afterthought.</p>
+
+<p>What had he done it for? That is rather difficult to explain&mdash;perhaps he
+hardly knew himself; he had a vague idea of proving to those
+disrespectful girls that enemies did exist, and that the protection of
+an Army was not to be despised.</p>
+
+<p>Then when he found himself alone in the camp, the temptation to carry
+his invention further was too much for him; and after Jack and Guy and
+Cecily, and even Uncle Lambert himself, accepted his story without
+hesitation, and treated him as a hero&mdash;why,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_212" id="Page_212">[Pg 212]</a></span> it would have looked so
+silly to explain then, and so he went through with it.</p>
+
+<p>Lying is lying, whatever explanations and excuses may be made respecting
+it, and I am afraid it must be admitted that Tinling, if he began by a
+mere harmless device for giving a new turn to the game, ended by telling
+some very unmistakable lies.</p>
+
+<p>Now he found himself in a most delicate position: what if an attack by
+Red Indians should really be quite possible? Mr. Lambert Jolliffe had
+certainly not seemed to see anything incredible in the former visit,
+and, though Clarence had not a very high opinion of his abilities, he
+was grown up, and was not likely to be misinformed on such a point as
+that&mdash;at all events, he was the best person to consult just then. As he
+expected, he found him under the big ilex on his back, with his
+after-breakfast pipe, no longer alight, between his lips.</p>
+
+<p>'Mr. Jolliffe; I say, Mr. Jolliffe,' began Clarence.</p>
+
+<p>Lambert Jolliffe sat up, and fixed his glass in one drowsy eye. 'Hullo,
+Sir Garnet&mdash;I beg your pardon, Lord Wolseley, I mean. You ought to hear
+what they're saying at the War Office, I can tell you!'</p>
+
+<p>Praise is sweet, even when we do not deserve it, and Clarence felt a
+thrill of satisfaction at this somewhat vague tribute.</p>
+
+<p>'I wanted to ask you,' he said, 'should you say that Red Indians
+were&mdash;well, common in England?'</p>
+
+<p>'You have asked me a straightforward question,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_213" id="Page_213">[Pg 213]</a></span> and I'll give you a
+straightforward answer,' was the reply. 'Till quite lately I should say
+they were absolutely unknown in this country.'</p>
+
+<p>Clarence's face brightened; he felt quite fond of Uncle Lambert, and
+began to think him a particularly well-informed and entertaining person.</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' continued Uncle Lambert, thoughtfully, 'I must confess I thought
+it a little unlikely at first that you should have been annoyed by Red
+Indians; but, of course, when I remembered the Earl's Court Show, I saw
+at once that it was quite possible.' Clarence felt a cold qualm. He had,
+as we already know, seen Buffalo Bill's wonderful show, which, indeed,
+was responsible for much of his recent military enthusiasm. But till
+that moment, curiously enough, it had not occurred to him to connect the
+mysterious Wah Na Sa Pash Boo with the denizens of the Wild West whom he
+had seen careering about the immense arena at Earl's Court.</p>
+
+<p>'Do you mean,' he said, with an effort, 'that you thought some of
+Buffalo Bill's Indians had managed to <i>escape</i>?'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, I don't know any other way to account for such a thing. Do you?'</p>
+
+<p>Clarence did not answer this question directly: 'But,' he objected
+desperately, 'those were <i>converted</i> Indians. They went to church, and
+the Lyceum, and all that!'</p>
+
+<p>Uncle Lambert shrugged his shoulders: 'Once an<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_214" id="Page_214">[Pg 214]</a></span> Indian always an
+Indian!' he said. 'They must have their fling now and then, I suppose,
+and then the old Adam crops up. And you see,' he added, 'it cropped up
+in that attack on you the other night. Fortunately for us, and indeed
+for the whole country, you were prepared for them&mdash;otherwise no one can
+tell what horrors we might not have seen.'</p>
+
+<p>'We may&mdash;we may see them yet!' said the hero, gloomily. 'Just look at
+this, Mr. Jolliffe.'</p>
+
+<p>Lambert took the bark from him, and read it with a thoughtful frown. At
+last he said:</p>
+
+<p>'Well, I rather expected something of this sort when I saw you posting
+up all those insulting notices&mdash;Indians are so confoundedly touchy, you
+know.'</p>
+
+<p>'You might have said that at the time, then!' exclaimed the General
+reproachfully.</p>
+
+<p>Lambert lifted his eyebrows.</p>
+
+<p>'My dear chap, I thought you knew. Wasn't that what you were all driving
+at?'</p>
+
+<p>'Not me,' said Clarence. 'I was against it from the first. I told them
+it was caddish to insult a fallen foe, but they would go and stick up
+those <i>beastly</i> notices.'</p>
+
+<p>'All's well that ends well, eh? You've got a rise out of 'em this time.
+I congratulate you, my boy, on getting the chance of a second brush with
+the Indians. And this time you'll have the army with you.'</p>
+
+<p>'A lot of good they are!' said Clarence, in a muffled voice.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_215" id="Page_215">[Pg 215]</a></span></p><p>'Come, it's not good form for a General to run down his troops; but you
+heroes are always so modest. I'll be bound, now, you've determined not
+to mention this in the house till the danger is passed?'</p>
+
+<p>'No, I haven't, though. I shall mention it, most likely. Why not?'</p>
+
+<p>'To save them useless anxiety. Because, unless I am wrong, you see cause
+to apprehend (I must ask you not to conceal anything from me)&mdash;to
+apprehend that this will be a more serious affair than the last?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, I do,' replied the General, promptly, 'a good deal.'</p>
+
+<p>'I feared as much,' said Uncle Lambert, with a very grave face. 'But in
+that case, isn't it as well not to terrify my sister and those poor
+girls unnecessarily?'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't see that. Mrs. Jolliffe might think we ought to be guarding the
+inside of the house.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh,' said Uncle Lambert, 'but I should object to that strongly. You see
+it's very plain that it's <i>you</i> the Yellow Vulture's after. He won't
+think of coming near the house unless you're in it, and then what will
+become of us all?'</p>
+
+<p>'You'll take care you don't get mixed up in it, I can see,' said
+Tinling, savagely.</p>
+
+<p>'I shall take very good care indeed. Oh, but you must make allowances
+for me, my boy. Remember, I've not been in military training for days
+and days, as you have.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_216" id="Page_216">[Pg 216]</a></span></p><p>'If that's all, I could get you up in the drill in half-an-hour,'
+proposed Tinling, eagerly.</p>
+
+<p>'Thanks, but I have a better reason still. Tastes differ so much. You
+like to spend your evenings in beating off wild Indians from a stockade.
+Now, I prefer a plain, comfortable dinner, and a quiet cigar. I'm not
+sure that your way isn't the manlier of the two&mdash;but it's not nearly so
+much in my line.'</p>
+
+<p>'Why don't you say you're a funk, and have done with it?' Tinling said
+rudely.</p>
+
+<p>'My dear young friend,' was the placid answer, 'if Providence has
+endowed you with a meed of personal courage beyond that of others, it is
+ungraceful to taunt those who are less fortunate. While I am by no means
+prepared to admit that I am what you so pleasingly term "a funk," I
+readily allow that&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>But Tinling did not stay to hear any more; he turned on his heel with an
+anger that had a spice of envy in it. Why, why had not he been content
+with an ordinary reputation, instead of one that he must sustain now at
+all hazards? He could deceive himself no longer; his foolish vanity,
+which had allowed the army to post those rash defiances, had brought
+down some real Red Indians upon him, and he was horribly afraid.</p>
+
+<p>As he walked restlessly down the path, a veil seemed drawn across the
+brilliant sky, the dahlias and 'red-hot pokers' and gladioli in the beds
+burnt with a sinister glow, the smell of the sweet peas and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_217" id="Page_217">[Pg 217]</a></span> mignonette
+seemed oppressive, the bees droning about the lavender patches had a
+note of warning in their buzz, he felt chilly in the shade and sick in
+the sun.</p>
+
+<p>He saw nothing for it but fighting, but the idea of facing a horde of
+howling savages with only two boys younger than himself was too
+appalling; he must engage recruits, grown-up ones, and with this
+intention he went to the stable-yard, where he found Chinnock, the
+coachman, sluicing the carriage-wheels.</p>
+
+<p>'Chinnock,' he began, with an attempt to seem casual and careless,
+'we're going to be attacked by Red Indians again to-night.'</p>
+
+<p>Chinnock touched a sandy forelock, as he raised his red grinning face.</p>
+
+<p>'Lor', sir, be you indeed? Well, you young genl'men du have rare goings
+on down in the paddock, that you du.'</p>
+
+<p>'It's&mdash;it's real Red Indians this time, Chinnock&mdash;B&mdash;black Bogallalas!'</p>
+
+<p>Chinnock had deliberately moved to the harness-room, and Tinling had to
+repeat his information.</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, indeed, sir! Red Injians? Well, to think o' that!' he said
+cheerfully, as if he was humouring some rather childish remark.</p>
+
+<p>'But we shall want every available man; do you think you can spare time
+to come and help?'</p>
+
+<p>''Bout what time, sir?' said Chinnock.</p>
+
+<p>'About nine&mdash;half-past eight, say. Do try.'</p>
+
+<p>'Can't come as late as that, nohow, sir. That's<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_218" id="Page_218">[Pg 218]</a></span> my supper-hour, that
+is. If the mistress don't want the carriage to-day, I dessay I could
+step down 'bout five for half-an-hour or so, if that would suit.'</p>
+
+<p>'That wouldn't be any use at all, Chinnock; we shan't begin till dark.'</p>
+
+<p>'Then I'm afraid I can't be of no sarvice to 'ee, sir.'</p>
+
+<p>The poor General turned away: evidently the coachman had no intention of
+risking his life. He remembered Joe, the gardener's boy and
+stable-help&mdash;he was better than no one. Joe was rolling the
+tennis-court, and grinned sheepishly on being pressed to join.</p>
+
+<p>'Noa, sur,' he said, 'it doan't lay in my work fur to fight no Injins. I
+see one onst at Reading Vair, I did, a nippin' about he wur, and a
+roarin'! I bain't goin' to hev naught to do with the likes o' he!'</p>
+
+<p>Tinling saw only one hope left. If he could see Mrs. Jolliffe and tell
+her of the danger which threatened him, she might refuse permission to
+fight at all, or, at the very least, she would see that he had proper
+assistance. So into the house he went, and the first person he found was
+Hazel, who was knitting her pretty forehead over the Latin exercise
+which had been given her as a holiday task.</p>
+
+<p>'I say, Hazel,' he said, with a trembling voice; but she interrupted
+him:</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, perhaps you can help me. What's the Latin for "Balbus says it is
+all over with the General"?'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_219" id="Page_219">[Pg 219]</a></span></p><p>He shivered; it sounded so like an omen. 'No, but Hazel, listen,' he
+said; 'the Indians are coming again to-night.'</p>
+
+<p>'If you're not going to talk sensibly,' said Hazel, 'go out this
+instant.'</p>
+
+<p>He saw she was utterly unsympathetic, and he wandered on to the hall,
+which was used as a morning-room, where Hilary sat painting a pansy, and
+he broke the news to her in much the same words. She actually laughed,
+and she had been almost as frightened as Cecily when he had told her of
+the other Indians.</p>
+
+<p>'You are too killing over those Red Indians!' she said. Privately, he
+thought that the Red Indians would do all the killing.</p>
+
+<p>'You needn't laugh; it's true!' he said solemnly.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, of course!' said Hilary; 'but don't come so near, or you'll upset
+my glass of water.' Hilary, too, was hopeless; he was reduced to his
+last cards now, and came in upon Mrs. Jolliffe as she sat at her
+writing-table. She looked up with a sweet, vague smile.</p>
+
+<p>'What is it now, dear boy?' she asked. 'I hope you are managing to amuse
+yourself.'</p>
+
+<p>'I think I ought to tell you,' he said thickly, 'that a tribe of
+Bogallala Indians are going to storm our encampment this evening.'</p>
+
+<p>Perhaps Mrs. Jolliffe was getting a little bored with military topics.
+'Yes, yes,' she said absently,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_220" id="Page_220">[Pg 220]</a></span> 'that will be very nice, I'm sure. Don't
+be too late in coming in, there's good boys.'</p>
+
+<p>'You don't <i>mind</i> our being there?&mdash;there will be danger!' he said with
+meaning.</p>
+
+<p>'Mind? Not in the very least, so long as you are enjoying yourself,' she
+said kindly.</p>
+
+<p>There went one card: he had but one more. 'Could you let Corklett and
+George' (they were the butler and page respectively) 'come down to the
+camp about half-past eight? We should be so much safer if we had them
+with us.'</p>
+
+<p>'What are you thinking of, Clarence? We dine at eight, remember; how can
+I send either of them down then? You really must be reasonable.'</p>
+
+<p>Clarence was by no means an ill-mannered boy in general, but fear made
+him insolent at this.</p>
+
+<p>'Of course, if you think your dinner is more important than us!' he
+burst out hotly.</p>
+
+<p>'Clarence, I can't allow you to speak to me in that way. It is
+ridiculous for you to expect me to alter my arrangements to suit your
+convenience,' said Mrs. Jolliffe; 'leave the room, or I shall be really
+angry with you. I don't wish to hear any more&mdash;go.'</p>
+
+<p>He went with a swelling heart, and in the garden he met Cecily. If he
+could only induce her to beg him not to risk his life again! He
+disclosed the situation as impressively as he could; but, alas! Cecily
+seemed perfectly tranquil.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_221" id="Page_221">[Pg 221]</a></span></p><p>'I'm not a bit afraid this time,' she said, 'because you beat them so
+easily before; there's only one thing, Clarence. You know I daren't lock
+the army in again&mdash;they've made it up; but they <i>were</i> so cross over it!
+So I want you to promise to look after them.'</p>
+
+<p>'I shall have enough to do to look after myself, I expect,' he answered
+roughly; 'you don't know what these Indians are.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, but I do, Clarence; I saw them at the "Wild West." I thought they
+looked rather nice then. And you know you frightened them so before. You
+are so awfully brave&mdash;aren't you?'</p>
+
+<p>'I&mdash;I don't think I feel quite so awfully brave as I did then,' he
+admitted.</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, but you will. Jack and Guy will be quite safe with you. Good-bye;
+I'm going to get some mulberry-leaves for my silkworms.' And she ran off
+cheerfully.</p>
+
+<p>It was his hard fate that everybody persisted in treating the affair in
+one of two ways&mdash;either they looked upon it as part of the army game, or
+else considered him such a champion, on the strength of his past
+exploits, that there was practically no danger even if a whole tribe of
+Redskins came to attack him.</p>
+
+<p>Luncheon that day was a terrible meal for him. Uncle Lambert (though he
+was too great a coward to go near the fight himself) seemed very anxious
+that<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_222" id="Page_222">[Pg 222]</a></span> the defenders should be in good condition. 'Give yourself a
+chance, General,' he would say; 'another slice of this roly-poly pudding
+may just turn the scale between you and Yellow Vulture. Look at the
+army&mdash;they're victualling for a regular siege!'</p>
+
+<p>But Clarence was quite unable to follow their example; he was annoyed
+with them for what he considered was 'showing off'&mdash;though he might have
+reflected that to consume three helpings of jam-and-suet in rapid
+succession was an almost impossible form of bravado.</p>
+
+<p>The rest of the afternoon he spent in trying to lower the army's
+confidence by telling all the gruesome stories of Indian warfare he
+could think of; but he frightened himself a great deal more than them,
+and at last had to abandon the attempt in despair.</p>
+
+<p>For Jack and Guy had no nerves to speak of; they were eager to clear
+their tarnished reputation, and the possibility of harm coming to them
+did not seem to present itself. They had formed rather a poor opinion of
+Buffalo Bill's Indians, whose yell turned out to be very little more
+than short yelps, and who ran away directly a Cowboy showed his nose.
+Hadn't Clarence defeated them with ease already? What Clarence had done
+alone they surely could do together, and then they had an unbounded
+belief in the impregnable character of their stockade.</p>
+
+<p>Tinling found that he could not undeceive them without exposing himself,
+which he would still rather<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_223" id="Page_223">[Pg 223]</a></span> die than do, and he roamed about the
+grounds, making a little mental calculation whenever a clock struck in
+the heavy afternoon stillness: 'In so many hours from this I shall be
+fighting hand-to-hand with real Indians!'</p>
+
+<p>Then at tea-time he thought (for the first time) the smell of cake quite
+detestable, and he hardly knew how he forced himself to sit quietly on
+his chair.</p>
+
+<p>'General Tinling,' said Uncle Lambert, 'before you, so to speak, "go to
+the front" and occupy the post of danger, will you oblige me by drawing
+up the troops before the verandah? I should like, though unable to
+accompany you myself, to say a few words of farewell.'</p>
+
+<p>Clarence sulkily acquiesced, and Lambert Jolliffe addressed the army:
+'Soldiers,' he said, 'a great responsibility rests upon you this day.
+You are expected solemnly and earnestly to strive your utmost <i>not</i> to</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<div>Let the red man dance</div>
+<div>By <i>our</i> red cedar tree,</div>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>to quote (with a trifling variation) from Tennyson's "Maud." For myself,
+I have no fears of the result. Under the leadership of your veteran
+General, victory must infallibly crown your arms. We peaceful civilians
+shall rest secure in the absolute confidence such protection inspires,
+and be the first to welcome your triumphant return. Should your hearts
+fail you at any moment, I have already instructed you how to act.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_224" id="Page_224">[Pg 224]</a></span> To
+the Commander himself I should consider the mere suggestion an
+impertinence. Go, then, devoted spirits, where Glory leads, and
+endeavour to avoid the indignity of scalping&mdash;if only for the sake of
+appearances. Soldiers, I have done. May the God of Battles (I need
+hardly explain to scholars that I refer to Mars) keep his eye on you!'</p>
+
+<p>Hazel and Hilary were also on the verandah, and used their handkerchiefs
+freely&mdash;but principally to conceal their mouths. 'They'll be sorry they
+laughed by-and-by;' thought Clarence; 'they'll wish they had cried just
+a little, perhaps!'&mdash;a reflection the pathos of which very nearly made
+him cry himself, as he marched down to the stockade, feeling distinctly
+unwell.</p>
+
+<p>Before he entered the fort he tore down the fatal notices. 'What's the
+good of that?' asked Guy.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, the Indians have seen 'em,' said the General.</p>
+
+<p>'But they'll think we want to back out of it,' objected Jack.</p>
+
+<p>'Let them think!' was the bold retort.</p>
+
+<p>Inside the fort Jack and Guy set to work in the highest spirits to
+barricade the entrance with wheelbarrows and an old mowing-machine; then
+they lit the lantern, and polished their guns, sharpened their swords,
+and looked to the springs of their pistols for about the hundredth time.</p>
+
+<p>'I say, this would jolly well pepper a Red Indian, wouldn't it!' cried
+Guy, showing a pistol, the tiny<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_225" id="Page_225">[Pg 225]</a></span> barrel of which was constructed to
+discharge swanshot with a steel watch-spring.</p>
+
+<p>'I tell you what,' said Jack, with the air of a trapper, 'I shall
+reserve my peas till I've fired away all the corks, and take a
+deliberate aim each time.'</p>
+
+<p>It was impossible to persuade them that these missiles would not be
+accepted as deadly by savages, who of course would know no better; and
+again, had not the first victory been won by these simple means?</p>
+
+<p>So General Tinling held his peace, and the western sky slowly changed
+from crocus to green, and from green to deep violet, and the evening
+star lighted its steady golden fire, the grasshoppers set up a louder
+chirp, a bat executed complicated figures overhead, and the boys
+unconsciously began to speak in whispers.</p>
+
+<p>'It's getting too dark to see much with this telescope,' said Jack, 'I
+wish we had a night-glass. The Indians ought to be here by this
+time&mdash;they said "sunset," didn't they? If I <i>was</i> a Red Indian I would
+be punctual! When do you suppose they'll come, Clarence&mdash;soon?'</p>
+
+<p>'How on earth do I know?' snapped the General from within the tent.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you needn't get in a bait over it. How did they come on the first
+time&mdash;did they crawl along like snakes till they were quite near, and
+then give a yell and rush at the stockade?'</p>
+
+<p>'I forget what they did&mdash;don't bother me!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_226" id="Page_226">[Pg 226]</a></span></p><p>'I suppose they'll all have tomahawks,' said Guy. 'Clarence, does
+scalping hurt?'</p>
+
+<p>There was a slight convulsion inside the tent, but no answer.</p>
+
+<p>'I wonder if the Bogallala torture prisoners,' Jack observed; 'I don't
+think I could stand <i>that</i>.'</p>
+
+<p>The General came to the tent-door at this: 'Can't you fellows shut up?'
+he said fiercely. 'They'll hear you!'</p>
+
+<p>'They're not here yet&mdash;we shall know when they come, by the
+signalling&mdash;let's all keep quite quiet for a minute or two.'</p>
+
+<p>There was a breathless interval of silence. At last Jack said: 'I hear
+something&mdash;a sort of low grunting noise, like pigs.'</p>
+
+<p>'Perhaps it is the pigs at the farm,' suggested Guy.</p>
+
+<p>'Indians can imitate all kinds of birds, I know,' reasoned Jack, not
+directly to the point, perhaps, but he was getting excited.</p>
+
+<p>Tinling felt a dull rage against the other two. How dared they pretend
+not to be afraid? It was all swagger&mdash;he knew that very well. Various
+unpleasant recollections began to rise in his mind. He remembered how
+that Indian spy had stalked the settler's cabin at Earl's Court. He
+could see him now, stealing over the sand, then listening with his ear
+to the ground, and turning to beckon on the ambushed warriors. He even
+remembered the way the yellow and red<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_227" id="Page_227">[Pg 227]</a></span> striped blinds of the log hut
+flapped in the wind, and how the horse that was hobbled outside raised
+his head from his hay, and pricked his ears uneasily, as the foe came
+gliding nearer and nearer. Then their way of fighting&mdash;he had thought it
+rather comic <i>then</i>&mdash;they hopped and pranced about like so many lively
+frogs, but the butchery would not be rendered any more agreeable by
+being accompanied by laughable gestures! And there was an almost naked
+light-yellow savage, whom he recalled dancing the war dance&mdash;he tried
+not to think of all this, but it came vividly before him.</p>
+
+<p>'S-s-h&mdash;<i>Cave</i>!' cried Guy, suddenly, as he looked through the loophole;
+'I can see just the top of one's head and feathers among the currant
+bushes. I'll touch him up in a second.'</p>
+
+<p>He raised his tiny spring pistol, and was just aiming, when Tinling,
+almost beside himself, darted on him, and struck it out of his hand.
+'What are you doing now?' he said, through his teeth. 'What is the good
+of <i>irritating</i> them?'</p>
+
+<p>'Why, they <i>are</i> irritated,' said Guy, 'or they wouldn't come.'</p>
+
+<p>'If they are,' retorted Clarence, raising his voice, 'whose doing was
+it? You can't say I had anything to do with putting up those defiances!
+Haven't I always said I respected Red men? They've got feelings like us.
+When you go and insult them, of course they get annoyed&mdash;who wouldn't, I
+should like to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_228" id="Page_228">[Pg 228]</a></span> know? I honour a chief like Yellow Vulture myself, and I
+don't care if he hears me say so. I say I honour him!'</p>
+
+<p>His voice rose almost to a scream as he concluded.</p>
+
+<p>'I say, Tinling, I do believe you're in a funk!' said Guy, after a
+moment of wondering silence.</p>
+
+<p>'If you are, say so, and we shall know what to do,' added Jack, feeling
+in his pocket. 'Are you?'</p>
+
+<p>'Feel his hands,' suggested Guy.</p>
+
+<p>'Look here,' said Clarence, dashing aside the obstacles before the door,
+'I'm not going to stay here to be treated in this way. If it hadn't been
+for your foolery in sticking up the notices we should have been friends
+with the Indians now. I don't want to quarrel with any Bogallala. And
+you have the cheek to ask me if I'm in a funk, and to want to feel my
+hands. Well, it just serves you right&mdash;I'm going.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, go then; who wants you?' said Guy.</p>
+
+<p>But softer-hearted Jack said, 'Clarence, you mustn't. You'll be safe in
+here; but out there&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>But the General had already vanished. He was crouching outside in the
+shadow of the stockade. He could not bear being penned up any longer; he
+must at least have a run for his life.</p>
+
+<p>Had the enemy heard him declare his innocence? If so, it did not seem to
+have softened them. They were still crouching&mdash;silent, hidden,
+relentless&mdash;behind the currant bushes, their scouts signalling to one
+another, for no <i>real</i> grasshopper ever made so much<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_229" id="Page_229">[Pg 229]</a></span> noise as that. He
+must make a bolt for it, and take his chance of their arrows missing
+him. Over the open space of grey-green grass he scuttled, and actually
+succeeded in reaching the friendly shadow of the holly hedge unharmed;
+but that was probably because they felt so certain of cutting him off at
+their pleasure.</p>
+
+<p>On tiptoe and trembling went the General along the narrow paths, green
+with damp, and latticed by the shadows which branches cast in the sickly
+moonlight, until&mdash;just when he was almost clear of the gloom&mdash;his knees
+bent under him; for there, at the end of the walk, against the starry
+sky, stood a towering figure, with bristling feather head-dress, and
+tomahawk poised.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, please, sir, don't!' he faltered, and shut his eyes, expecting the
+Indian to bound upon him. But when he opened his eyes again, the savage
+was gone! He must have slipped behind a ragged old yew which had once
+been clipped and trimmed to look like a chess-king.</p>
+
+<p>Clarence Tinling tottered on through the shrubbery, which was full of
+terrors. Warriors, stealthy and cruel, lurked behind every rustling
+laurel; far away on the lawn he saw their spears through the tall pampas
+grass; he heard them chirping, clucking, and grunting in every direction
+as they lay in wait for him, until at last he gained the broad gravel
+path, at the end of which&mdash;oh, how far away they <span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_230" id="Page_230">[Pg 230]</a></span>seemed!&mdash;were the
+three lighted windows of the drawing-room. He could see the interior
+quite plainly, and the group round the piano where the shaded lamp made
+a spot of brilliant colour. What were they all doing? Were they huddled
+together, waiting, watching in an agony of suspense? Nothing of the
+kind: it will be scarcely credited, perhaps, but this heartless domestic
+circle were positively passing the time with music, as if nothing were
+happening!</p>
+
+<p>If only he could reach that bright drawing-room before the rush came! He
+felt that there were lithe forms stealing along behind the flower-beds.
+He dared not run, but dragged his heavy feet along the gravel; and then,
+all at once, from the rhododendron bushes rose a wild, unearthly yell.
+He could bear it no longer; he would make one last effort, even if they
+tomahawked him on the very verandah.</p>
+
+<p>Somehow&mdash;he never knew how&mdash;he found himself in the midst of that quiet
+musical party, wild with terror, scarcely able to speak.</p>
+
+<p>'The Red Indians!' he gasped. 'Don't let them get me! Save me&mdash;hide me
+somewhere!' and he remembered afterwards that he made a mad endeavour to
+get inside the piano.</p>
+
+<p>He was instantly surrounded by the astonished family. 'My dear
+Clarence,' said Mrs. Jolliffe, 'you're perfectly safe&mdash;you've been
+frightening yourself with your own game. There are no Indians here.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_231" id="Page_231">[Pg 231]</a></span></p><p>Another howl from the shrubbery seemed to contradict her. 'There,
+didn't you hear that?' he cried. 'Oh, you won't believe me till it's too
+late! There are hundreds of them round the stockade. They may have
+scalped Jack and Guy by this time!'</p>
+
+<p>'And why ain't you being scalped too?' inquired Uncle Lambert.</p>
+
+<p>'I'm sure you needn't talk!' he retorted; 'you weren't any more anxious
+to fight than I am.'</p>
+
+<p>'But isn't that different? I thought you had fought them before, and
+conquered?'</p>
+
+<p>'Then you thought wrong! Those&mdash;those weren't real Indians&mdash;I made them
+up, then!'</p>
+
+<p>'Now we've got it!' said Uncle Lambert. 'Well, Master Clarence, you've
+made your little confession, and now it's my turn&mdash;<i>I</i> made Yellow
+Vulture up!'</p>
+
+<p>'Are you sure&mdash;really sure&mdash;on your honour?' he asked eagerly.</p>
+
+<p>'Honest Injun!' said Lambert. 'You see, I began to think the military
+business was getting rather overdone; the army, like Wordsworth's world,
+was "too much with us," and it occurred to me to see whether the
+General's courage would stand an outside test&mdash;so I composed that little
+challenge. Yes, you see before you the only Wah Na Sa Pash Boo&mdash;no
+others are genuine!'</p>
+
+<p>Tinling felt that those girls were laughing at him; they had probably
+been in the secret for some time;<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_232" id="Page_232">[Pg 232]</a></span> but he could not care much just
+then&mdash;the relief was so delicious!</p>
+
+<p>'It was too bad of you, Lambert,' said Mrs. Jolliffe. 'He was really
+horribly frightened, and there are those other two down in the stockade
+all alone&mdash;you might have thought of that&mdash;they will be half out of
+their minds by this time!'</p>
+
+<p>'My dear Cecilia,' was the reply,'don't be uneasy, I <i>did</i> think of it.
+The moment they begin to feel at all uncomfortable they have directions
+to open a certain packet which explains the whole thing. If the gallant
+General had not been in quite such a hurry, he would have spared himself
+this unpleasant experience.'</p>
+
+<p>'Let's all go down, and see how they're getting on,' said Hazel.</p>
+
+<p>'I know this,' said the General sullenly, 'they were in quite as big a
+funk as I was!'</p>
+
+<p>'Then why didn't they run in, and ask to be hidden too?' inquired
+Hilary.</p>
+
+<p>'Why? Because they didn't dare!' retorted Tinling, boldly.</p>
+
+<p>'You know,' he remarked to Cecily, as they were going down together
+through the warm darkness, 'it's not fair of your uncle to play these
+tricks on fellows.'</p>
+
+<p>'Perhaps it isn't quite,' said Cecily, impartially; 'but then he didn't
+<i>begin</i>, did he?'</p>
+
+<p>'Ahoy!' shouted Uncle Lambert, as they neared<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_233" id="Page_233">[Pg 233]</a></span> the stockade, and he was
+answered by a ringing cheer from the fortress.</p>
+
+<p>'Come on&mdash;we ain't afraid of you! Don't skulk there&mdash;see what you'll
+get!' And a volley of peas, corks, and small shot flew about their ears.</p>
+
+<p>Lambert Jolliffe ran forward: 'Hi, stop that! spare our lives!' he
+cried, laughing. 'Jack, you young rascal, put down that confounded
+popgun&mdash;can't you see we're not Red Indians?'</p>
+
+<p>'What, is it you, uncle?' said Guy, in a rather crestfallen tone. 'Where
+are the Red Indians then?'</p>
+
+<p>'They had to go up to town to see their dentist. But do you mean to say
+you haven't opened my envelope after all?'</p>
+
+<p>'I thought you told us it was only in case we got frightened?' said
+Jack.</p>
+
+<p>'What does the General say to <i>that</i>?' cried Lambert&mdash;but Clarence
+Tinling was nowhere to be found. He had slipped off to his bedroom, and
+the next morning he announced at breakfast that he 'thought his people
+would be wanting him at home.'</p>
+
+<p>So the army was disbanded, for there was a general disarmament, and on
+the afternoon after Tinling's departure the entire Jolliffe family
+engaged in a grand cricket match, when lazy Uncle Lambert came out
+unexpectedly strong as an overhand bowler.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_234" id="Page_234">[Pg 234]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="SHUT_OUT" id="SHUT_OUT"></a><i>SHUT OUT</i></h2>
+
+<p>It is towards the end of an afternoon in December, and Wilfred Rolleston
+is walking along a crowded London street with his face turned westward.
+A few moments ago and he was scarcely conscious of where he was or where
+he meant to go: he was walking on mechanically in a heavy stupor,
+through which there stole a haunting sense of degradation and despair
+that tortured him dully. And suddenly, as if by magic, this has
+vanished: he seems to himself to have waked from a miserable day dream
+to the buoyant consciousness of youth and hope. Temperaments which are
+subject to fits of heavy and causeless depression have their
+compensations sometimes in the reaction which follows; the infesting
+cares, as in Longfellow's poem, 'fold their tents, like the Arabs, and
+as silently steal away,' and with their retreat comes an exquisite
+exhilaration which more equable dispositions can never experience.</p>
+
+<p>Is this so with Rolleston now? He only knows that the cloud has lifted
+from his brain, and that in the clear sunshine which bursts upon him now
+he can<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_235" id="Page_235">[Pg 235]</a></span> look his sorrows in the face and know that there is nothing so
+terrible in them after all.</p>
+
+<p>It is true that he is not happy at the big City day school which he has
+just left. How should he be? He is dull and crabbed and uncouth, and
+knows too well that he is an object of general dislike; no one there
+cares to associate with him, and he makes no attempt to overcome their
+prejudices, being perfectly aware that they are different from him, and
+hating them for it, but hating himself, perhaps, the most.</p>
+
+<p>And though all his evenings are spent at home there is little rest for
+him even there, for the work for the next day must be prepared; and he
+sits over it till late, sometimes with desperate efforts to master the
+difficulties, but more often staring at the page before him with eyes
+that are almost wilfully vacant.</p>
+
+<p>All this has been and is enough in itself to account for the gloomy
+state into which he had sunk. But&mdash;and how could he have forgotten
+it?&mdash;it is over for the present.</p>
+
+<p>To-night he will not have to sit up struggling with the tasks which will
+only cover him with fresh disgrace on the morrow; for a whole month he
+need not think of them, nor of the classes in which the hand of everyone
+is against him. For the holidays have begun; to-day has been the last of
+the term. Is there no reason for joy and thankfulness in that? What a
+fool he has been to let those black thoughts gain such a hold over him!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_236" id="Page_236">[Pg 236]</a></span></p><p>Slowly, more as if it had all happened a long time ago instead of quite
+recently, the incidents of the morning come back to him, vivid and clear
+once more&mdash;morning chapel and the Doctor's sermon, and afterwards the
+pretence of work and relaxed discipline in the class rooms, when the
+results of the examinations had been read out, with the names of the
+boys who had gained prizes and their remove to the form above. He had
+come out last of course, but no one expected anything else from him; a
+laugh had gone round the desks when his humble total closed the list,
+and he had joined in it to show them he didn't care. And then the class
+had been dismissed, and there had been friendly good-byes, arrangements
+for walking home in company or for meeting during the holidays&mdash;for all
+but him; he had gone out alone&mdash;and the dull blankness had come over him
+from which he has only just recovered.</p>
+
+<p>But, for the present at all events, he has got rid of it completely; he
+is going home, where at least he is not despised, where he will find a
+sanctuary from gibes and jostlings and impositions; and the longer he
+thinks of this the higher his spirits rise, and he steps briskly, with a
+kind of exultation, until the people he passes in the streets turn and
+look at him, struck by his expression. 'They can see how jolly I'm
+feeling,' he thinks with a smile.</p>
+
+<p>The dusk is falling, and the shops he passes are brilliant with lights
+and decorations, but he does not<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_237" id="Page_237">[Pg 237]</a></span> stop to look at any of them; his mind
+is busy with settling how he shall employ himself on this the first
+evening of his liberty, the first for so long on which he could feel his
+own master.</p>
+
+<p>At first he decides to read. Is there not some book he had begun and
+meant to finish, so many days ago now that he has even forgotten what it
+was all about, and only remembers that it was exciting?</p>
+
+<p>And yet, he thinks, he won't read to-night&mdash;not on the very first night
+of the holidays. Quite lately&mdash;yesterday or the day before&mdash;his mother
+had spoken to him, gently but very seriously, about what she called the
+morose and savage fits which would bring misery upon him if he did not
+set himself earnestly to overcome them.</p>
+
+<p>And there were times, he knew, when it seemed as if a demon possessed
+him and drove him to wound even those who loved him and whom he
+loved&mdash;times when their affection only roused in him some hideous spirit
+of sullen contradiction.</p>
+
+<p>He feels softened now somehow, and has a new longing for the love he has
+so often harshly repulsed. He <i>will</i> overcome this sulkiness of his; he
+will begin this very evening; as soon as he gets home he will tell his
+mother that he is sorry, that he does love her really, only that when
+these fits come on him he hardly knows what he says or does.</p>
+
+<p>And she will forgive him, only too gladly; and his mind will be quite at
+ease again. No, not quite;<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_238" id="Page_238">[Pg 238]</a></span> there is still something he must do before
+that: he has a vague recollection of a long-standing coolness between
+himself and his younger brother, Lionel. They never have got on very
+well together; Lionel is so different&mdash;much cleverer even already, for
+one thing; better looking too, and better tempered. Whatever they
+quarrelled about Wilfred is very sure that he was the offender; Lionel
+never begins that kind of thing. But he will put himself in the right at
+once, and ask Lionel to make friends again; he will consent readily
+enough&mdash;he always does.</p>
+
+<p>And then he has a bright idea: he will take his brother some little
+present to prove that he really wishes to behave decently for the
+future. What shall he buy?</p>
+
+<p>He finds himself near a large toy shop at the time, and in the window
+are displayed several regiments of brightly coloured tin warriors&mdash;the
+very thing! Lionel is still young enough to delight in them.</p>
+
+<p>Feeling in his pockets, Rolleston discovers more loose silver than he
+had thought he possessed, and so he goes into the shop and asks for one
+of the boxes of soldiers. He is served by one of two neatly dressed
+female assistants, who stare and giggle at one another at his first
+words, finding it odd, perhaps, that a fellow of his age should buy
+toys&mdash;as if, he thinks indignantly, they couldn't see that it was not
+for <i>himself</i> he wanted the things.</p>
+
+<p>But he goes on, feeling happier after his purchase.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_239" id="Page_239">[Pg 239]</a></span> They will see now
+that he is not so bad after all. It is long since he has felt such a
+craving to be thought well of by somebody.</p>
+
+<p>A little farther on he comes to a row of people, mostly women and
+tradesmen's boys, standing on the curb stone opposite a man who is
+seated in a little wooden box on wheels drawn up close to the pavement.
+He is paralytic and blind, with a pinched white face framed in an
+old-fashioned fur cap with big ear lappets; he seems to be preaching or
+reading, and Rolleston stops idly enough to listen for a few moments,
+the women making room for him with alacrity, and the boys staring
+curiously round at the new arrival with a grin.</p>
+
+<p>He hardly pays much attention to this; he is listening to the poem which
+the man in the box is reciting with a nasal and metallic snuffle in his
+voice:</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<div>There's a harp <i>and</i> a crown,</div>
+<div class="i1">For you and <i>for</i> me,</div>
+<div>Hanging on the boughs</div>
+<div class="i1">Of that Christmas tree!</div>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>He hears, and then hurries on again, repeating the stanza mechanically
+to himself, without seeing anything particularly ludicrous about it. The
+words have reminded him of that Christmas party at the Gordons', next
+door. Did not Ethel Gordon ask him particularly to come, and did he not
+refuse her sullenly? What a brute he was to treat her like that!<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_240" id="Page_240">[Pg 240]</a></span> If she
+were to ask him again, he thinks he would not say no, though he does
+hate parties.</p>
+
+<p>Ethel is a dear girl, and never seems to think him good-for-nothing, as
+most people do. Perhaps it is sham though&mdash;no, he can't think that when
+he remembers how patiently and kindly she has borne with his senseless
+fits of temper and tried to laugh away his gloom.</p>
+
+<p>Not every girl as pretty as Ethel is would care to notice him, and
+persist in it in spite of everything; yet he has sulked with her of
+late. Was it because she had favoured Lionel? He is ashamed to think
+that this may have been the reason.</p>
+
+<p>Never mind, that is all over now; he will start clear with everybody. He
+will ask Ethel, too, to forgive him. Is there nothing he can do to
+please her? Yes some time ago she had asked him to draw something for
+her. (He detests drawing lessons, but he has rather a taste for drawing
+things out of his own head.) He had told her, not too civilly, that he
+had work enough without doing drawings for girls. He will paint her
+something to-night as a surprise; he will begin as soon as tea is
+cleared away; it will be more sociable than reading a book.</p>
+
+<p>And then already he sees a vision of the warm little panelled room, and
+himself getting out his colour-box and sitting down to paint by
+lamp-light&mdash;for any light does for his kind of colouring&mdash;while<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_241" id="Page_241">[Pg 241]</a></span> his
+mother sits opposite and Lionel watches the picture growing under his
+hand.</p>
+
+<p>What shall he draw? He gets quite absorbed in thinking over this; his
+own tastes run in a gory direction, but perhaps Ethel, being a girl, may
+not care for battles or desperate duels. A compromise strikes him; he
+will draw a pirate ship: that will be first rate, with the black flag
+flying on the mainmast, and the pirate captain on the poop scouring the
+ocean with a big glass in search of merchantmen; all about the deck and
+rigging he can put the crew, with red caps, and belts stuck full of
+pistols and daggers.</p>
+
+<p>And on the right there shall be a bit of the pirate island, with a mast
+and another black flag&mdash;he knows he will enjoy picking out the skull and
+cross-bones in thick Chinese white&mdash;and then, if there is room, he will
+add a cannon, and perhaps a palm tree. A pirate island always has palm
+trees.</p>
+
+<p>He is so full of this projected picture of his that he is quite
+surprised to find that he is very near the square where he lives; but
+here, just in front of him, at the end of the narrow lane, is the
+public-house with the coach and four engraved on the ground glass of the
+lower part of the window, and above it the bottles full of coloured
+water.</p>
+
+<p>And here is the greengrocer's. How long is it since it was a
+barber's?&mdash;surely a very little time. And there is the bootmaker's, with
+its outside display<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_242" id="Page_242">[Pg 242]</a></span> of dangling shoes, and the row of naked gas jets
+blown to pale blue specks and whistling red tongues by turns as a gust
+sweeps across them.</p>
+
+<p>This is his home, this little dingy, old-fashioned red-brick house at an
+angle of the square, with a small paved space railed in before it. He
+pushes open the old gate with the iron arch above, where an oil-lamp
+used to hang, and hurries up to the door with the heavy shell-shaped
+porch, impatient to get to the warmth and light which await him within.</p>
+
+<p>The bell has got out of order, for only a faint jangle comes from below
+as he rings; he waits a little and then pulls the handle again, more
+sharply this time, and still no one comes.</p>
+
+<p>When Betty does think proper to come up and open the door he will tell
+her that it is too bad keeping a fellow standing out here, in the fog
+and cold, all this time.... She is coming at last&mdash;no, it was fancy; it
+seems as if Betty had slipped out for something, and perhaps the cook is
+upstairs, and his mother may be dozing by the fire, as she has begun to
+do of late.</p>
+
+<p>Losing all patience, he gropes for the knocker, and, groping in vain,
+begins to hammer with bare fists on the door, louder and louder, until
+he is interrupted by a rough voice from the railings behind him.</p>
+
+<p>'Now then, what are you up to there, eh?' says<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_243" id="Page_243">[Pg 243]</a></span> the voice, which belongs
+to a burly policeman who has stopped suspiciously on the pavement.</p>
+
+<p>'Why,' says Rolleston, 'I want to get in, and I can't make them hear me.
+I wish you'd try what you can do, will you?'</p>
+
+<p>The policeman comes slowly in to the gate. 'I dessay,' he says
+jocularly. 'Is there anythink else? Come, suppose you move on.'</p>
+
+<p>A curious kind of dread of he knows not what begins to creep over
+Wilfred at this.</p>
+
+<p>'Move on?' he cries, '<i>why</i> should I move on? This is my house; don't
+you see? I live here.'</p>
+
+<p>'Now look 'ere, my joker, I don't want a job over this,' says the
+constable, stolidly. 'You'll bring a crowd round in another minute if
+you keep on that 'ammering.'</p>
+
+<p>'Mind your own business,' says the other with growing excitement.</p>
+
+<p>'That's what you'll make me do if you don't look out,' is the retort.
+'Will you move on before I make you?'</p>
+
+<p>'But, I say,' protests Rolleston, 'I'm not joking; I give you my word
+I'm not. I do live here. Why, I've just come back from school, and I
+can't get in.'</p>
+
+<p>'Pretty school <i>you</i> come from!' growls the policeman; ''andles on to
+<i>your</i> lesson books, if <i>I</i> knows anything. 'Ere, out you go!'</p>
+
+<p>Rolleston's fear increases. 'I won't! I won't!' he cries frantically,
+and rushing back to the door<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_244" id="Page_244">[Pg 244]</a></span> beats upon it wildly. On the other side of
+it are love and shelter, and it will not open to him. He is cold and
+hungry and tired after his walk; why do they keep him out like this?</p>
+
+<p>'Mother!' he calls hoarsely. 'Can't you hear me, mother? It's Wilfred;
+let me in!'</p>
+
+<p>The other takes him, not roughly, by the shoulder. 'Now you take my
+advice,' he says. 'You ain't quite yourself; you're making a mistake. I
+don't want to get you in trouble if you don't force me to it. Drop this
+'ere tomfool game and go home quiet to wherever it is you <i>do</i> live.'</p>
+
+<p>'I tell you I live here, you fool!' shrieks Wilfred, in deadly terror
+lest he should be forced away before the door is opened.</p>
+
+<p>'And I tell you you don't do nothing of the sort,' says the policeman,
+beginning to lose his temper. 'No one don't live 'ere, nor ain't done
+not since I've bin on the beat. Use your eyes if you're not too far
+gone.'</p>
+
+<p>For the first time Rolleston seems to see things plainly as they are; he
+glances round the square&mdash;that is just as it always is on foggy winter
+evenings, with its central enclosure a shadowy black patch against a
+reddish glimmer, beyond which the lighted windows of the houses make
+yellow bars of varying length and tint.</p>
+
+<p>But this house, his own&mdash;why, it is all shuttered and dark; some of the
+window panes are broken;<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_245" id="Page_245">[Pg 245]</a></span> there is a pale grey patch in one that looks
+like a dingy bill; the knocker has been unscrewed from the door, and on
+its scraped panels someone has scribbled words and rough caricatures
+that were surely not there when he left that morning.</p>
+
+<p>Can anything&mdash;any frightful disaster&mdash;have come in that short time? No,
+he will not think of it; he will not let himself be terrified, all for
+nothing.</p>
+
+<p>'Now, are you goin'?' says the policeman after a pause.</p>
+
+<p>Rolleston puts his back against the door and clings to the sides. 'No!'
+he shouts. 'I don't care what you say; I don't believe you: they are all
+in there&mdash;they are, I tell you, they are&mdash;they <i>are</i>!'</p>
+
+<p>In a second he is in the constable's strong grasp and being dragged,
+struggling violently, to the gate, when a soft voice, a woman's,
+intercedes for him.</p>
+
+<p>'What is the matter? Oh, don't&mdash;don't be so rough with him, poor
+creature!' it cries pitifully.</p>
+
+<p>'I'm only exercisin' my duty, mum,' says the officer; 'he wants to
+create a disturbance 'ere.'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' cries Wilfred, 'he lies! I only want to get into my own house, and
+no one seems to hear me. <i>You</i> don't think anything is the matter, do
+you?'</p>
+
+<p>It is a lady who has been pleading for him; as he wrests himself from
+his captor and comes forward she sees his face, and her own grows white
+and startled.</p>
+
+<p>'Wilfred!' she exclaims.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_246" id="Page_246">[Pg 246]</a></span></p><p>'Why, you know my name!' he says. 'Then you can tell him it's all
+right. Do I know you? You speak like&mdash;is it&mdash;<i>Ethel</i>?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' she says, and her voice is low and trembling, 'I am Ethel.'</p>
+
+<p>He is silent for an instant; then he says slowly, 'You are not the
+same&mdash;nothing is the same: it is all changed&mdash;changed&mdash;and oh, my God,
+what am <i>I</i>?'</p>
+
+<p>Slowly the truth is borne in upon his brain, muddled and disordered by
+long excess, and the last shred of the illusion which had possessed him
+drifts away.</p>
+
+<p>He knows now that his boyhood, with such possibilities of happiness as
+it had ever held, has gone for ever. He has been knocking at a door
+which will open for him never again, and the mother by whose side his
+evening was to have been passed died long long years ago.</p>
+
+<p>The past, blotted out completely for an hour by some freak of the
+memory, comes back to him, and he sees his sullen, morbid boyhood
+changing into something worse still, until by slow degrees he became
+what he is now&mdash;dissipated, degraded, lost.</p>
+
+<p>At first the shock, the awful loneliness he awakes to, and the shame of
+being found thus by the woman for whom he had felt the only pure love he
+had known, overwhelm him utterly, and he leans his head upon his arms as
+he clutches the railings, and sobs with a grief that is terrible in its
+utter abandonment.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_247" id="Page_247">[Pg 247]</a></span></p><p>The very policeman is silent and awed by what he feels to be a scene
+from the human tragedy, though he may not be able to describe it to
+himself by any more suitable phrase than 'a rum start.'</p>
+
+<p>'You can go now, policeman,' says the lady, putting money in his hand.
+'You see I know this&mdash;this gentleman. Leave him to me; he will give you
+no trouble now.'</p>
+
+<p>And the constable goes, taking care, however, to keep an eye
+occasionally on the corner where this has taken place. He has not gone
+long before Rolleston raises his head with a husky laugh: his manner has
+changed now; he is no longer the boy in thought and expression that he
+was a short time before, and speaks as might be expected from his
+appearance.</p>
+
+<p>'I remember it all now,' he says. 'You are Ethel Gordon, of course you
+are, and you wouldn't have anything to do with me&mdash;and quite right
+too&mdash;and then you married my brother Lionel. You see I'm as clear as a
+bell again now. So you came up and found me battering at the old door,
+eh? Do you know, I got the fancy I was a boy again and coming home
+to&mdash;bah, what does all that matter? Odd sort of fancy though, wasn't it?
+Drink is always playing me some cursed trick now. A pretty fool I must
+have made of myself!'</p>
+
+<p>She says nothing, and he thrusts his hands deep in his ragged pockets.
+'Hallo! what's this I've got?' he says, as he feels something at the
+bottom of one of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_248" id="Page_248">[Pg 248]</a></span> them, and, bringing out the box of soldiers he had
+bought half an hour before, he holds it up with a harsh laugh which has
+the ring of despair in it.</p>
+
+<p>'Do you see this?' he says to her. 'You'll laugh when I tell you it's a
+toy I bought just now for&mdash;guess whom&mdash;for your dear husband! Must have
+been pretty bad, mustn't I? Shall I give it to you to take to him&mdash;no?
+Well, perhaps he has outgrown such things now, so here goes!' and he
+pitches the box over the railings, and it falls with a shiver of broken
+glass as the pieces of painted tin rattle out upon the flag-stones.</p>
+
+<p>'And now I'll wish you good evening,' he says, sweeping off his battered
+hat with mock courtesy.</p>
+
+<p>She tries to keep him back. 'No, Wilfred, no; you must not go like that.
+We live here still, Lionel and I, in the same old house,' and she
+indicates the house next door; 'he will be home very soon. Will you'
+(she cannot help a little shudder at the thought of such a guest)&mdash;'will
+you come in and wait for him?'</p>
+
+<p>'Throw myself into his arms, eh?' he says. 'How delighted he would be!
+I'm just the sort of brother to be a credit to a highly respectable
+young barrister like him. You really think he'd like it? No; it's all
+right, Ethel; don't be alarmed: I was only joking. I shall never come in
+your way, I promise you. I'm just going to take myself off.'</p>
+
+<p>'Don't say that,' she says (in spite of herself she<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_249" id="Page_249">[Pg 249]</a></span> feels relieved);
+'tell me&mdash;is there nothing we can do&mdash;no help we can give you?'</p>
+
+<p>'Nothing,' he answers fiercely; 'I don't want your pity. Do you think I
+can't see that you wouldn't touch me with the tongs if you could help
+it? It's too late to snivel over me now, and I'm well enough as I am.
+You leave me alone to go to the devil my own way; it's all I ask of you.
+Good-bye. It's Christmas, isn't it? I haven't dreamed <i>that</i> at all
+events. Well, I wish you and Lionel as merry a Christmas as I mean to
+have. I can't say more than that in the way of enjoyment.'</p>
+
+<p>He turns on his heel at the last words and slouches off down the narrow
+lane by which he had come. Ethel Rolleston stands for a while, looking
+after his receding form till the fog closes round it and she can see it
+no more. She feels as if she had seen a ghost; and for her at least the
+enclosure before the deserted house next door will be haunted
+evermore&mdash;haunted by a forlorn and homeless figure sobbing there by the
+railings.</p>
+
+<p>As for the man, he goes on his way until he finds a door
+which&mdash;alas!&mdash;is not closed against him.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_250" id="Page_250">[Pg 250]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="TOMMYS_HERO" id="TOMMYS_HERO"></a><i>TOMMY'S HERO</i></h2>
+
+<h3>A STORY FOR SMALL BOYS</h3>
+
+<p>It was the night after Tommy had been taken to his first pantomime, and
+he had been lying asleep in his little bedroom (for now that he was nine
+he slept in the night nursery no longer); he had been asleep, when he
+was suddenly awakened by a brilliant red glare. At first he was afraid
+the house was on fire, but when the red turned to a dazzling green, he
+gave a great gasp of delight, for he thought the transformation scene
+was still going on. 'And there's all the best part still to come,' he
+said to himself.</p>
+
+<p>But as he became wider awake, he saw that it was out of the question to
+expect his bedroom to hold all those wonders, and he was almost
+surprised to see that there was even so much as a single fairy in it. A
+fairy there was, nevertheless; she stood there with a star in her hair,
+and her dress shimmering out all around her, just as he had seen her a
+few hours before, when she rose up, with little jerks, inside a great
+gilded shell, and spoke some poetry, which he didn't quite catch.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_251" id="Page_251">[Pg 251]</a></span></p><p>She spoke audibly enough now, nor was her voice so squeaky as it had
+sounded before. 'Little boy,' she began, 'I am the ruling genius of
+Pantomime Fairyland. You entered my kingdom for the first time last
+night&mdash;how did you enjoy yourself?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh,' said Tommy, '<i>so</i> much; it was splendid, thank you!'</p>
+
+<p>She smiled and seemed well pleased. 'I always call to inquire on a new
+acquaintance,' she said. 'And so you liked our realms, as every sensible
+boy does? Well, Tommy, it is in my power to reward you; every night for
+a certain time you shall see again the things you liked best. What <i>did</i>
+you like best?'</p>
+
+<p>'The clown part,' said Tommy, promptly.</p>
+
+<p>For it ought to be said here that he was a boy who had always had a
+leaning to the kind of practical fun which he saw carried out by the
+clown to a pitch of perfection which at once enchanted and humbled him.
+Till that harlequinade, he had thought himself a funny boy in his way,
+and it had surprised him that his family had not found him more amusing
+than they did; but now he felt all at once that he was only a very
+humble beginner, and had never understood what real fun was.</p>
+
+<p>For he had not soared much above hiding behind doors, and popping out
+suddenly on a passing servant, causing her to 'jump' delightfully; once,
+indeed, he used to be able to 'sell' his family by pretending all<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_252" id="Page_252">[Pg 252]</a></span>
+manner of calamities, but they had grown so stupid lately that they
+never believed a single word he said.</p>
+
+<p>No, the clown would not own him as a follower: he would despise his
+little attempts at practical jokes. 'Still,' thought Tommy, 'I can try
+to be more like him; perhaps he will come to hear of me some day!'</p>
+
+<p>For he had never met anyone he admired half so much as that clown, who
+was always in a good temper (to be sure he had everything his own
+way&mdash;but then he deserved to), always quick and ready with his excuses;
+and if he did run away in times of danger, it was not because he was
+really afraid! Then how deliciously impudent he was to shopkeepers! Who
+but he would have dared to cheapen a large fish by making a door mat of
+it, or to ask the prices of cheeses on purpose to throw mud at them? Not
+that he couldn't be serious when he chose&mdash;for once he unfurled a Union
+Jack and said something quite noble, which made everybody clap their
+hands for two minutes; and he told people the best shops to go to for a
+quantity of things, and he could not have been joking <i>then</i>, for they
+were the same names that were to be seen on all the hoardings.</p>
+
+<p>This will explain how it was natural that Tommy, on being asked which
+part of the pantomime he preferred, should say, without the slightest
+hesitation, 'Oh, the <i>clown</i> part!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_253" id="Page_253">[Pg 253]</a></span></p><p>The fairy seemed less pleased. 'The clown part!' she repeated. 'What,
+those shop scenes tacked on right at the end without rhyme or reason?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' said Tommy, 'those ones!'</p>
+
+<p>'And the great wood with the shifting green and violet lights, and the
+white bands of fairies dancing in circles&mdash;didn't you like them?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh yes,' said the candid Tommy; 'pretty well. I didn't care much for
+them.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' she said, 'but you liked the grand processions, with all their
+gorgeous dresses and monstrous figures, surely you liked <i>them</i>?'</p>
+
+<p>'There was such a lot of it,' said Tommy. 'The clown was the best.'</p>
+
+<p>'And if you could, you'd rather see those last scenes again than all the
+rest?' she said, frowning a little.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, wouldn't I just!' said Tommy; 'but may I&mdash;really and truly?'</p>
+
+<p>'I see you are not one of <i>my</i> boys,' said the Genius of Pantomime,
+rather sadly. 'It so happens that those closing scenes are the very ones
+I have least control over&mdash;they are a part of my kingdom which has
+fallen into sad decay and rebellion. But one thing, O Tommy, I <i>can</i> do
+for you. I will give you the clown for a friend and companion&mdash;and much
+good may he do you!'</p>
+
+<p>'But would he <i>come</i>?' he asked, hardly daring to believe in such
+condescension.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_254" id="Page_254">[Pg 254]</a></span></p><p>'He must, if <i>I</i> bid him; it is for you to make him feel comfortable
+and at home with you;&mdash;the longer you can keep him the better I shall be
+pleased.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, <i>how</i> kind of you!' he cried; 'he shall stay all the holidays. I'd
+rather have him than anybody else. What fun we shall have&mdash;what fun!'</p>
+
+<p>The green fire faded out and the fairy with it. He must have fallen
+asleep again, for, when he opened his eyes, there was the clown at the
+foot of his bed making a face.</p>
+
+<p>''Ullo!' said the clown; 'I say, are you the nice little boy I was told
+to come and stay with?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, yes,' said Tommy; 'I am so glad to see you. I'm just going to get
+up.'</p>
+
+<p>'I know you are,' said the clown, and upset him out of bed into the cold
+bath.</p>
+
+<p>This he could not help thinking a little bit unkind of the clown on such
+a cold morning, particularly as he followed it up by throwing a
+hair-brush, two pieces of soap, and a pair of shoes at him before he
+could get out again.</p>
+
+<p>But it woke him, at all events, and he ventured (with great respect) to
+throw one of the shoes back; it just grazed the clown's top-knot.</p>
+
+<p>To Tommy's alarm, the clown set up a hullaballoo as if he was mortally
+injured.</p>
+
+<p>'You cruel, unkind little boy,' he sobbed, 'to play so rough with a poor
+clown!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_255" id="Page_255">[Pg 255]</a></span></p><p>'But you threw them at me first,' pleaded Tommy, 'and much harder,
+too!'</p>
+
+<p>'I'm the oldest,' said the clown, 'and you've got to make me feel at
+home, or I shall go away again.'</p>
+
+<p>'I won't do it again, and I'm very sorry,' pleaded Tommy; but the clown
+wouldn't be friends with him for ever so long, and was only appeased at
+last by being allowed to put Tommy upside down in a tall wicker basket
+which stood in a corner.</p>
+
+<p>Then he helped Tommy to dress by buttoning all his clothes the wrong
+way, and hiding his stockings and necktie. While he was doing this,
+Sarah, the under-nurse, came in, and he strutted up to her and began to
+dance quietly. 'Go away, imperence,' said Sarah.</p>
+
+<p>'Beautiful gal,' said the clown (though Sarah was extremely plain), 'I
+love yer!' and he put out his tongue and wagged his head at her until
+she ran out of the room in terror.</p>
+
+<p>He looked so absurd that Tommy was delighted with him again, and yet,
+when the bell rang for breakfast, he felt obliged to give his new friend
+a hint.</p>
+
+<p>'I say,' he said, 'you don't mind my telling you&mdash;but mother's very
+particular about manners at table;' but the clown relieved him instantly
+by saying that so was he&mdash;<i>very</i> particular; and he slid down the
+banisters and turned somersaults in the hall until Tommy joined him.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_256" id="Page_256">[Pg 256]</a></span></p><p>'I do hope father and mother won't be unkind to him,' he thought, as he
+went in, 'because he does seem to feel things so.'</p>
+
+<p>But nothing could be more polite than the welcome Tommy's parents gave
+the stranger, as he came in, bowing very low, and making a queer little
+skipping step. Tommy's mother said she was always glad to see any friend
+of her boy's, while his father begged the clown to make himself quite at
+home. All <i>he</i> said was, 'I'm disgusted to make your acquaintance;' but
+he certainly made himself at home&mdash;in fact, he was not quite so
+particular about his manners as he had led Tommy to expect.</p>
+
+<p>He volunteered to divide the sausages and bacon himself, and did so in
+such a way that everybody else got very little and he himself got a
+great deal. If it had been anybody else, Tommy would certainly have
+called this 'piggish'; as it was, he tried to think it was all fun, and
+that he himself had no particular appetite.</p>
+
+<p>His cousin Barbara, a little girl of about his own age, was staying with
+them just then, and came down presently to breakfast. 'Oh, my!' said the
+clown, laying a great red hand on his heart, 'what a nice little gal you
+are, ain't yer? Come and sit by me, my dear!'</p>
+
+<p>'No, thank you; I'm going to sit by Aunt Mary,' she replied, looking
+rather shy and surprised.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_257" id="Page_257">[Pg 257]</a></span></p><p>'Allow me, missy,' he persisted, 'to pass you the strawberry-jam and
+the muffins!'</p>
+
+<p>'I'll have some jam, thank you,' she replied.</p>
+
+<p>He looked round and chuckled. 'Oh, I say; that little gal said "thank
+you" before she got it!' he exclaimed. 'There ain't no muffins, and I've
+eaten all the jam!' which made Tommy choke with laughter.</p>
+
+<p>Barbara flushed. 'That's a very stupid joke,' she pronounced severely,
+'and rude, too; it's a pity you weren't taught to behave better when you
+were young.'</p>
+
+<p>'So I was!' said the clown, with his mouth full.</p>
+
+<p>'Then you've forgotten it,' she said; 'you're nothing but a big baby,
+that you are!'</p>
+
+<p>'Yah!' retorted the clown; 'so are <i>you</i> a big baby!' which, as even
+Tommy saw, was not a very brilliant reply. It was a singular fact about
+the clown that the slightest check seemed to take away all his
+brilliancy.</p>
+
+<p>'You know you're not telling the truth now,' said Barbara, so
+contemptuously, that the clown began to weep bitterly. 'She says I don't
+speak the truth!' he complained, 'and she <i>knows</i> it will be my aunt's
+birthday last Toosday!'</p>
+
+<p>'You great silly thing, what has that to do with it?' cried Barbara,
+indignantly. 'What <i>is</i> there to cry about?' which very nearly made
+Tommy quarrel with her, for why couldn't she be polite to <i>his</i> friend?</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_258" id="Page_258">[Pg 258]</a></span></p><p>However, the clown soon dried his eyes on the tablecloth, and recovered
+his cheerfulness; and presently he noticed the <i>Times</i> lying folded by
+Tommy's papa's plate.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I say, mister,' he said, 'shall I air the newspaper for yer?'</p>
+
+<p>'Thank you, if you will,' was the polite reply.</p>
+
+<p>He shook it all out in one great sheet and wrapped it round him, and
+waddled about in it until Tommy nearly rolled off his seat with delight.</p>
+
+<p>'When you've <i>quite</i> done with it&mdash;&mdash;' his father was saying mildly, as
+the clown made a great hole in the middle and thrust his head out of it
+with a bland smile.</p>
+
+<p>'I'm only just looking through it,' he explained; 'you can have it now,'
+and he rolled it up in a tight ball and threw it at his host's head.</p>
+
+<p>Breakfast was certainly not such a dull meal as usual that morning,
+Tommy thought; but he wished his people would show a little more
+appreciation, instead of sitting there all stiff and surprised; he was
+afraid the clown would feel discouraged.</p>
+
+<p>When his papa undid the ball, the paper was found to be torn into long
+strips, which delighted Tommy; but his father, on the other hand, seemed
+annoyed, possibly because it was not so easy to read in that form.
+Meanwhile, the clown busied himself in emptying the butter-dish into his
+pockets, and this did shock the boy a little, for he knew it was not<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_259" id="Page_259">[Pg 259]</a></span>
+polite to pocket things at meals, and wondered how he could be so nasty.</p>
+
+<p>Breakfast was over at last, and the clown took Tommy's arm and walked
+upstairs to the first floor with him.</p>
+
+<p>'Who's in there?' he asked, as they passed the spare bedroom.</p>
+
+<p>'Granny,' said the boy; 'she's staying with us; only she always has
+breakfast in her room, you know.'</p>
+
+<p>'Why, you don't mean to say you've got a granny!' cried the clown, with
+joy; 'you are a nice little boy; now we'll have some fun with her.'
+Tommy felt doubtful whether she could be induced to join them so early
+in the morning, and said so. 'You knock, and say you've got a present
+for her if she'll come out,' suggested the clown.</p>
+
+<p>'But I haven't,' objected Tommy; 'wouldn't that be a story?' He had
+unaccountably forgotten his old fondness for 'sells.'</p>
+
+<p>'Of course it would,' said the clown; 'I'm always a tellin' of 'em, I
+am.'</p>
+
+<p>Tommy was shocked once more, as he realised that his friend was not a
+<i>truthful</i> clown. But he knocked at the door, nevertheless, and asked
+his grandmother to come out and see a friend of his.</p>
+
+<p>'Wait one minute, my boy,' she answered, 'and I'll come out.'</p>
+
+<p>Tommy was surprised to see his companion<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_260" id="Page_260">[Pg 260]</a></span> preparing to lie, face
+downwards, on the mat just outside the door.</p>
+
+<p>'Get up,' he said; 'you'll trip grandma up if you stay there.'</p>
+
+<p>'That's what I'm doing it for, stoopid,' said the clown.</p>
+
+<p>'But it will hurt her,' he cried.</p>
+
+<p>'Nothing hurts old women,' said the clown; 'I've tripped up 'undreds of
+'em, and I ought to know.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, you shan't trip up my granny, anyhow,' said Tommy, stoutly; for
+he was not a bad-hearted boy, and his grandmother had given him a
+splendid box of soldiers on Christmas Day. 'Don't come out, granny; it's
+a mistake,' he shouted.</p>
+
+<p>The clown rose with a look of disgust.</p>
+
+<p>'Do you call this actin' like a friend to me?' he demanded.</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said Tommy, apologetically, 'she's my granny, you see.'</p>
+
+<p>'She ain't <i>my</i> granny, and, if she was, I'd let you trip her up, I
+would; <i>I</i> ain't selfish. I shan't stop with you any longer.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, do,' said Tommy; 'we'll go and play somewhere else.'</p>
+
+<p>'Well,' said the clown, relenting, 'if you're a good boy you shall see
+me make a butter-slide in the hall.'</p>
+
+<p>Then Tommy saw how he had wronged him in thinking he had pocketed the
+butter out of mere greediness, and he felt ashamed and penitent; the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_261" id="Page_261">[Pg 261]</a></span>
+clown made a beautiful slide, though Tommy wished he would not insist
+upon putting all the butter that was left down his back.</p>
+
+<p>'There's a ring at the bell,' said the clown; 'I'll open the door, and
+you hide and see the fun.'</p>
+
+<p>So Tommy hid himself round a corner as the door opened.</p>
+
+<p>'Walk in, sir,' said the clown, politely.</p>
+
+<p>'Master Tommy in?' said a jolly, hearty voice. It was dear old Uncle
+John, who had taken him to the pantomime the night before. 'I thought
+I'd look in and see if he would care to come with me to the
+Crystal&mdash;&mdash;oh!' And there was a scuffling noise and a heavy bump.</p>
+
+<p>Tommy ran out, full of remorse. Uncle John was sitting on the tiles
+rubbing his head, and, oddly enough, did not look at all funny.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, uncle,' cried the boy, 'you're not hurt? I didn't know it was you!'</p>
+
+<p>'I'm a bit shaken, my boy, that's all,' said his uncle; 'one doesn't
+come down like a feather at my age.' And he picked himself slowly up.
+'Well, I must get home again,' he said; 'no Crystal Palace to-day,
+Tommy, after this. Good-bye.'</p>
+
+<p>And he went slowly out, leaving Tommy with the feeling that he had had
+enough of slides. He even wiped the flooring clean again with a
+waterproof and the clothes-brush, though the clown (who had been hiding)
+tried to prevent him.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_262" id="Page_262">[Pg 262]</a></span></p><p>'We ain't 'ad 'arf the fun out of it yet!' he complained (he always
+spoke in rather a common way, as Tommy began to notice with pain).</p>
+
+<p>'I've had enough,' said Tommy. 'It was my Uncle John who slipped down
+that time, and he's hurt, and he'd come to take me to the Crystal
+Palace!'</p>
+
+<p>'Well, he hadn't come to take <i>me</i>,' said the clown; 'you are stingy
+about your relations, you are; you ain't 'arf a boy for a bit o' fun.'</p>
+
+<p>Tommy felt this rebuke very much, he had hoped so to gain the clown's
+esteem; but he would not give in, he only suggested humbly that they
+should go up into the play-room.</p>
+
+<p>The play-room was at the top of the house, and Barbara and two little
+sisters of Tommy's were playing there when they came in, the clown
+turning in his toes and making awful faces.</p>
+
+<p>The two little girls ran into a corner, and seemed considerably
+frightened by the stranger's appearance, but Barbara reassured them.</p>
+
+<p>'Don't take any notice,' she said, 'it's only a horrid friend of
+Tommy's. He won't interfere with <i>us</i>.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, Barbara,' the boy protested, 'he's awfully nice if you only knew
+him. He can make you laugh. Do let us play with you. He wants to, and he
+won't be rough.'</p>
+
+<p>'Do,' pleaded the clown, 'I'll behave so pretty!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_263" id="Page_263">[Pg 263]</a></span></p><p>'Well,' said Barbara, 'mind you do, then, or you shan't stop.'</p>
+
+<p>And for a little while he did behave himself. Tommy showed him his new
+soldiers, and he seemed quite interested; and then he had a ride on the
+rocking horse, and was sorry when it broke down under him; and after
+that he came suddenly upon a beautiful doll which belonged to the
+youngest sister.</p>
+
+<p>'Do let me nurse it,' he said, and the little girl gave it up timidly.
+Of course he nursed it the wrong way up, and at last he forgot, and sat
+down on it, the head, which was wax, being crushed to pieces!</p>
+
+<p>Tommy was in fits of laughter at the droll face he made as he held out
+the crushed doll at arm's length, and looked at it with one eye shut,
+exclaiming, 'Poor thing! what a pity! I do 'ope I 'aven't made its 'ead
+ache!'</p>
+
+<p>But the two little girls were crying bitterly in one another's arms, and
+Barbara turned on the clown with tremendous indignation.</p>
+
+<p>'You did it on purpose, you know you did!' she said.</p>
+
+<p>'Go away, little girl; don't talk to me!' said the clown, putting Tommy
+in front of him.</p>
+
+<p>'Tommy,' she said, 'what did you bring your friend up here for? He only
+spoils everything he's allowed to touch. Take him away!'</p>
+
+<p>'Barbara,' pleaded Tommy, 'he's a <i>visitor</i>, you know!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_264" id="Page_264">[Pg 264]</a></span></p><p>'I don't care,' she replied. 'Mr. Clown, you shan't stay here; this is
+our room, and we don't want you. Go away!' She walked towards him
+looking so fierce that he backed hastily. 'Go downstairs,' she said,
+pointing to the door. 'You, too, Tommy, for you encouraged him!'</p>
+
+<p>'Nyah, nyah, nyah!' said the clown, a sound by which he intended to
+imitate her anger. 'Oh, please, I'm going; remember me to your mother.'
+And he left the room, followed rather sadly by Tommy, who felt that
+Barbara was angry with him. 'That's a very disagribble little girl,'
+remarked the clown, confidentially, when they were safe outside, and
+Tommy thought it wiser to agree.</p>
+
+<p>'What have you got in your pockets?' he asked, presently, seeing a hard
+bulge in his friend's white trunks.</p>
+
+<p>'Only some o' your nice soldiers,' said the clown, and walked into the
+schoolroom, where there was a fire burning. 'Are they brave?' he asked.</p>
+
+<p>'Very,' said Tommy, who had quite persuaded himself that this was so.
+'Look here, we'll have a battle.' He thought a battle would keep the
+clown quiet. 'Here's two cannon and peas, and you shall be the French
+and I'll be English.'</p>
+
+<p>'All right,' said the clown, and took his share of the soldiers and
+calmly put them all in the middle of the red-hot coals. 'I want to be
+quite sure they can stand fire first,' he explained; and then, as<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_265" id="Page_265">[Pg 265]</a></span> they
+melted, he said, 'There, you see, they're all running away. I never see
+such cowards.'</p>
+
+<p>Tommy was in a great rage, and could almost have cried, if it had not
+been babyish, for they were his best regiments which he could see
+dropping down in great glittering stars on the ashes below. 'That's a
+caddish thing to do,' he said, with difficulty; 'I didn't give them to
+you to put in the fire!'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, I thought you did,' said the clown, 'I beg your pardon;' and he
+threw the rest after them as he spoke.</p>
+
+<p>'You're a beast!' cried Tommy, indignantly; 'I've done with you, after
+this.'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, no, yer ain't,' he returned.</p>
+
+<p>'I have, though,' said Tommy; 'we're not friends any longer.'</p>
+
+<p>'All right,' said the clown; 'when I'm not friends with any one, I take
+and use the red-'ot poker to 'em,' and he put it in the fire to heat as
+he spoke.</p>
+
+<p>This terrified the boy. It was no use trying to argue with the clown,
+and he had seen how he used a red-hot poker. 'Well, I'll forgive you
+this time,' he said hastily; 'let's come away from here.'</p>
+
+<p>'I tell you what,' said the clown, 'you and me'll go down in the kitchen
+and make a pie.'</p>
+
+<p>Tommy forgot his injuries at this delightful idea; he knew what the
+clown's notion of pie-making would be. 'Yes,' he said eagerly, 'that
+will be jolly; only<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_266" id="Page_266">[Pg 266]</a></span> I don't know,' he added doubtfully, 'if cook will
+let us.'</p>
+
+<p>However, the clown soon managed to secure the kitchen to himself; he had
+merely to attempt to kiss the cook once or twice and throw the best
+dinner service at the other servants, and they were left quite alone to
+do as they pleased.</p>
+
+<p>What fun it was, to begin with! The clown brought out a large deep dish,
+and began by putting a whole turkey and an unskinned hare in it out of
+the larder; after that he put in sausages, jam, pickled walnuts, and
+lemons, and, in short, the first thing that came to hand.</p>
+
+<p>'It ain't 'arf full yet,' he said at last, as he looked gravely into the
+pie.</p>
+
+<p>'No,' said Tommy, sympathetically, 'can't we get anything else to put
+in?'</p>
+
+<p>'The very thing,' cried the clown, 'you're just about the right size to
+fill up&mdash;my! what a pie it's going to be, eh?' And he caught up his
+young friend, just as he was, rammed him into the pie, and poured sauce
+on him.</p>
+
+<p>But he kicked and howled until the clown grew seriously displeased. 'Why
+carn't you lay quiet,' he said angrily, 'like the turkey does? you don't
+deserve to be put into such a nice pie!'</p>
+
+<p>'If you make a pie of me,' said Tommy, artfully, 'there'll be nobody to
+look on and laugh at you, you know!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_267" id="Page_267">[Pg 267]</a></span></p><p>'No more there won't,' said the clown, and allowed him to crawl out,
+all over sauce. 'It was a pity,' he declared, 'because he fitted so
+nicely, and now they would have to look about for something else;' but
+he contrived to make a shift with the contents of the cook's
+work-basket, which he poured in&mdash;reels, pin-cushions, wax, and all. He
+had tried to put the kitchen cat in too, but she scratched his hands and
+could not be induced to form the finishing touch to the pie.</p>
+
+<p>How the clown got the paste and rolled it, and made Tommy in a mess with
+it, and how the pie was finished at last, would take too long to tell
+here; but somehow it was not quite such capital fun as he had
+expected&mdash;it seemed to want the pantomime music or something; and then
+Tommy was always dreading lest the clown should change his mind at the
+last minute, and put him in the pie after all.</p>
+
+<p>Even when it was safely in the oven he had another fear lest he should
+be made to stay and eat it, for it had such very peculiar things in it
+that it could not be at all nice. Fortunately, as soon as it was put
+away the clown seemed to weary of it himself.</p>
+
+<p>'Let me and you go and take a walk,' he suggested.</p>
+
+<p>Tommy caught at the proposal, for he was fast becoming afraid of the
+clown, and felt really glad to get him out of the house; so he got his<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_268" id="Page_268">[Pg 268]</a></span>
+cap, and the clown put on a brown overcoat and a tall hat, under which
+his white and red face looked stranger than ever, and they sallied forth
+together.</p>
+
+<p>Once Tommy would have thought it a high privilege to be allowed to go
+out shopping with a clown; but, if the plain truth must be told, he did
+not enjoy himself so very much after all. People seemed to stare at them
+so, for one thing, and he felt almost ashamed of his companion, whose
+behaviour was outrageously ridiculous. They went to all the family
+tradesmen, to whom Tommy was, of course, well known, and the clown
+<i>would</i> order the most impossible things, and say they were for Tommy!
+Once he even pushed him into a large draper's shop, full of pretty and
+contemptuous young ladies, and basely left him to explain his presence
+as he could.</p>
+
+<p>But it was worse when they happened to meet an Italian boy with a tray
+of plaster images on his head.</p>
+
+<p>'Here's a lark!' said the clown, and elbowed Tommy against him in such a
+way that the tray slipped and all the images fell to the ground with a
+crash.</p>
+
+<p>It was certainly amusing to see all the pieces rolling about; but, while
+Tommy was still laughing, the boy began to howl and denounce him to the
+crowd which gathered round them. The crowd declared that it was a shame,
+and that Tommy ought<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_269" id="Page_269">[Pg 269]</a></span> to be made to pay for it; and no one said so more
+loudly and indignantly than the clown!</p>
+
+<p>Before he could escape he had to give his father's name and address, and
+promise that he would pay for the damage, after which he joined the
+clown (who had strolled on) with a heavy heart, for he knew that that
+business would stop all his pocket-money for years after he was grown
+up! He even ventured to reproach his friend: 'I shan't sneak of you, of
+course, he said, 'but you know <i>you</i> did it!' The clown's only answer to
+this was a reproof for telling wicked stories.</p>
+
+<p>At last they passed a confectioner's, and the clown suddenly remembered
+that he was hungry, so they went in, and he borrowed sixpence from
+Tommy, which he spent in buns.</p>
+
+<p>He ate them all himself slowly, and was so very quiet and well-behaved
+all the time that Tommy hoped he was sobering down. They had gone a
+little way from the shop when he found that the clown was eating tarts.</p>
+
+<p>'You might give me one,' said Tommy; and the clown, after looking over
+his shoulder, actually gave him all he had left, filling his pocket with
+them, in fact.</p>
+
+<p>'I never saw you buy them,' he said wonderingly, which the clown said
+was very peculiar; and just then an attendant came up breathlessly.</p>
+
+<p>'You forgot to pay for those tarts,' she said.</p>
+
+<p>The clown replied that he never took pastry. She<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_270" id="Page_270">[Pg 270]</a></span> insisted that they
+were gone, and he must have taken them.</p>
+
+<p>'It wasn't me, please,' said the clown; 'it was this little boy done it.
+Why, he's got a jam tart in his pocket now. Where's a policeman?'</p>
+
+<p>Tommy was so thunderstruck by this treachery that he could say nothing.
+It was only what he might have expected, for had not the clown served
+the pantaloon exactly the same the night before? But that did not make
+the situation any the funnier now, particularly as the clown made such a
+noise that two real policemen came hurrying up.</p>
+
+<p>Tommy did not wait for them. No one held him, and he ran away at the top
+of his speed. What a nightmare sort of run it was!&mdash;the policemen
+chasing him, and the clown urging them on at the top of his voice.
+Everybody he passed turned round and ran after him too.</p>
+
+<p>Still he kept ahead. He was surprised to find how fast he could run, and
+all at once he remembered that he was running the opposite way from
+home. Quick as thought he turned up the first street he came to, hoping
+to throw them off the scent and get home by a back way.</p>
+
+<p>For the moment he thought he had got rid of them; but just as he stopped
+to take breath, they all came whooping and hallooing round the corner
+after him; and he had to scamper on, panting, and sobbing, and
+staggering, and almost out of his mind<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_271" id="Page_271">[Pg 271]</a></span> with fright. If he could only
+get home first, and tell his mother! But they were gaining on him, and
+the clown was leading and roaring with delight as he drew closer and
+closer. He came to a point where two roads met. It was round another
+corner, and they could not see him. He ran down one, and, to his immense
+relief, found they had taken the other. He was saved, for his house was
+quite near now.</p>
+
+<p>He tried to hasten, but the pavement was all slushy and slippery, and
+his boots felt heavier and heavier, and, to add to his misery, the
+pursuers had found out their mistake. As he looked back, he could see
+the clown galloping round the corner and hear his yell of discovery.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, fairy, dear fairy,' he gasped, 'save me this time. I <i>do</i> like your
+part best, now!'</p>
+
+<p>She must have heard him and taken pity, for in a second he had reached
+his door, and it flew open before him. He was not safe even yet, so he
+rushed upstairs to his bedroom, and bounced, just as he was, into his
+bed.</p>
+
+<p>'If they come up I'll pretend I'm ill,' he thought, as he covered his
+head with the bedclothes.</p>
+
+<p>They <i>were</i> coming up, all of them. There was a great trampling on the
+stairs. He heard the clown officiously shouting: 'This way, Mr.
+Policeman, sir!' and then a tremendous battering at his door.</p>
+
+<p>He lay there shivering under the blankets.</p>
+
+<p>'Perhaps they'll think the door's locked, and go<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_272" id="Page_272">[Pg 272]</a></span> away,' he tried to
+hope, and the battering went on not quite so violently.</p>
+
+<p>'Master Tommy! Master Tommy!' It was Sarah's voice. They had got her to
+come up and tempt him out. Well, she <i>wouldn't</i>, then!</p>
+
+<p>And then&mdash;oh! horror!&mdash;the door was thrown open. He sprang out of bed in
+an agony.</p>
+
+<p>'Sarah! Sarah! keep them out,' he gasped. 'Don't let them take me away!'</p>
+
+<p>'Lor', Master Tommy! keep who out?' said Sarah, wonderingly.</p>
+
+<p>'The&mdash;the clown&mdash;and the policemen,' he said. 'I know they're behind the
+door.'</p>
+
+<p>'There, there!' said Sarah; 'why, you ain't done dreaming yet. That's
+what comes of going out to these late pantomimes. Rub your eyes; it's
+nearly eight o'clock.'</p>
+
+<p>Tommy could have hugged her. It was only a dream after all, then. As he
+stood there, shivering in his nightgown, the nightmare clown began to
+melt away, though even yet some of the adventures he had gone through
+seemed too vivid to be quite imaginary.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>Singularly enough, his Uncle John actually did call that morning, and to
+take him to the Crystal Palace, too; and as there was no butter-slide
+for him to fall down on, they were able to go. On the way Tommy told him
+all about his unpleasant dream.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_273" id="Page_273">[Pg 273]</a></span></p><p>'I shall always hate a clown after this, uncle,' he said, as he
+concluded.</p>
+
+<p>'My good Tommy,' said his uncle, 'when you are fortunate enough to dream
+a dream with a moral in it, don't go and apply it the wrong way up. The
+real clown, like a sensible man, keeps his fun for the place where it is
+harmless and appreciated, and away from the pantomime conducts himself
+like any other respectable person. Now, your <i>dream</i> clown, Tommy&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>'I know,' said Tommy, meekly. 'Should you think the pantomime was good
+here, Uncle John?'</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_274" id="Page_274">[Pg 274]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="A_CANINE_ISHMAEL" id="A_CANINE_ISHMAEL"></a><i>A CANINE ISHMAEL</i></h2>
+
+<h3>(FROM THE NOTES OF A DINER-OUT)</h3>
+
+<p>'Tell me,' she said suddenly, with a pretty imperiousness that seemed to
+belong to her, 'are you fond of dogs?' How we arrived at the subject I
+forget now, but I know she had just been describing how a collie at a
+dog-show she had visited lately had suddenly thrown his forepaws round
+her neck in a burst of affection&mdash;a proceeding which, in my own mind
+(although I prudently kept this to myself), I considered less
+astonishing than she appeared to do.</p>
+
+<p>For I had had the privilege of taking her in to dinner, and the meal had
+not reached a very advanced stage before I had come to the conclusion
+that she was the most charming, if not the loveliest, person I had ever
+met.</p>
+
+<p>It was fortunate for me that I was honestly able to answer her question
+in a satisfactory manner, for, had it been otherwise, I doubt whether
+she would have deigned to bestow much more of her conversation upon me.</p>
+
+<p>'Then I wonder,' she said next, meditatively, 'if<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_275" id="Page_275">[Pg 275]</a></span> you would care to
+hear about a dog that belonged to&mdash;to someone I know very well? Or would
+it bore you?'</p>
+
+<p>I am very certain that if she had volunteered to relate the adventures
+of Telemachus, or the history of the Thirty Years' War, I should have
+accepted the proposal with a quite genuine gratitude. As it was, I made
+it sufficiently plain that I should care very much indeed to hear about
+that dog.</p>
+
+<p>She paused for a moment to reject an unfortunate <i>entr&eacute;e</i> (which I
+confess to doing my best to console), and then she began her story. I
+shall try to set it down as nearly as possible in her own words,
+although I cannot hope to convey the peculiar charm and interest that
+she gave it for me. It was not, I need hardly say, told all at once, but
+was subject to the inevitable interruptions which render a dinner-table
+intimacy so piquantly precarious.</p>
+
+<p>'This dog,' she began quietly, without any air of beginning a story,
+'this dog was called Pepper. He was not much to look at&mdash;rather a rough,
+mongrelly kind of animal; and he and a young man had kept house together
+for a long time, for the young man was a bachelor and lived in chambers
+by himself. He always used to say that he didn't like to get engaged to
+anyone, because he was sure it would put Pepper out so fearfully.
+However, he met somebody at last who made him forget about Pepper, and
+he proposed and was accepted&mdash;and then, you know,'<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_276" id="Page_276">[Pg 276]</a></span> she added, as a
+little dimple came in her cheek, 'he had to go home and break the news
+to the dog.'</p>
+
+<p>She had just got to this point, when, taking advantage of a pause she
+made, the man on her other side (who was, I daresay, strictly within his
+rights, although I remember at the time considering him a pushing beast)
+struck in with some remark which she turned to answer, leaving me
+leisure to reflect.</p>
+
+<p>I was feeling vaguely uncomfortable about this story; something, it
+would be hard to say what, in her way of mentioning Pepper's owner made
+me suspect that he was more than a mere acquaintance of hers.</p>
+
+<p>Was it <i>she</i>, then, who was responsible for&mdash;&mdash;? It was no business of
+mine, of course; I had never met her in my life till that evening&mdash;but I
+began to be impatient to hear the rest.</p>
+
+<p>And at last she turned to me again: 'I hope you haven't forgotten that I
+was in the middle of a story. You haven't? And you would really like me
+to go on? Well, then&mdash;oh yes, when Pepper was told, he was naturally a
+little annoyed at first. I daresay he considered he ought to have been
+consulted previously. But, as soon as he had seen the lady, he withdrew
+all opposition&mdash;which his master declared was a tremendous load off his
+mind, for Pepper was rather a difficult dog, and slow as a rule to take
+strangers into his affections, a little snappy and surly, and very
+easily hurt or offended. Don't you know dogs who<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_277" id="Page_277">[Pg 277]</a></span> are sensitive like
+that? <i>I</i> do, and I'm always so sorry for them&mdash;they feel little things
+so much, and one never can find out what's the matter, and have it out
+with them! Sometimes it's shyness; once I had a dog who was quite
+painfully shy&mdash;self-consciousness it was really, I suppose, for he
+always fancied everybody was looking at him, and often when people were
+calling he would come and hide his face in the folds of my dress till
+they had gone&mdash;it was too ridiculous! But about Pepper. He was devoted
+to his new mistress from the very first. I am not sure that she was
+quite so struck with him, for he was not at all a lady's dog, and his
+manners had been very much neglected. Still, she came quite to like him
+in time; and when they were married, Pepper went with them for the
+honeymoon.'</p>
+
+<p>'<i>When they were married!</i>' I glanced at the card which lay half-hidden
+by her plate. Surely <i>Miss</i> So-and-so was written on it?&mdash;yes, it was
+certainly 'Miss.' It was odd that such a circumstance should have
+increased my enjoyment of the story, perhaps&mdash;but it undoubtedly did.</p>
+
+<p>'After the honeymoon,' my neighbour continued, 'they came to live in the
+new house, which was quite a tiny one, and Pepper was a very important
+personage in it indeed. He had his mistress all to himself for the
+greater part of most days, as his master had to be away in town; so she
+used to talk to him intimately, and tell him more than she would have<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_278" id="Page_278">[Pg 278]</a></span>
+thought of confiding to most people. Sometimes, when she thought there
+was no fear of callers coming, she would make him play, and this was
+quite a new sensation for Pepper, who was a serious-minded animal, and
+took very solemn views of life. At first he hadn't the faintest idea
+what was expected of him; it must have been rather like trying to romp
+with a parish beadle, he was so intensely respectable! But as soon as he
+once grasped the notion and understood that no liberty was intended, he
+lent himself to it readily enough and learnt to gambol quite creditably.
+Then he was made much of in all sorts of ways; she washed him twice a
+week with her very own hands&mdash;which his master would never have dreamt
+of doing&mdash;and she was always trying new ribbons on his complexion. That
+rather bored him at first, but it ended by making him a little conceited
+about his appearance. Altogether he was dearly fond of her, and I don't
+believe he had ever been happier in all his life than he was in those
+days. Only, unfortunately, it was all too good to last.'</p>
+
+<p>Here I had to pass olives or something to somebody, and the other man,
+seeing his chance, and, to do him justice, with no idea that he was
+interrupting a story, struck in once more, so that the history of Pepper
+had to remain in abeyance for several minutes.</p>
+
+<p>My uneasiness returned. Could there be a mistake about that name-card
+after all? Cards <i>do</i> get re-arranged sometimes, and she seemed to know
+that<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_279" id="Page_279">[Pg 279]</a></span> young couple so very intimately. I tried to remember whether I had
+been introduced to her as a Miss or Mrs. So-and-so, but without success.
+There is some fatality which generally distracts one's attention at the
+critical moment of introduction, and in this case it was perhaps easily
+accounted for. My turn came again, and she took up her tale once more.
+'I think when I left off I was saying that Pepper's happiness was too
+good to last. And so it was. For his mistress was ill, and, though he
+snuffed and scratched and whined at the door of her room for ever so
+long, they wouldn't let him in. But he managed to slip in one day
+somehow, and jumped up on her lap and licked her hands and face, and
+almost went out of his mind with joy at seeing her again. Only (I told
+you he was a sensitive dog) it gradually struck him that she was not
+<i>quite</i> so pleased to see him as usual&mdash;and presently he found out the
+reason. There was another animal there, a new pet, which seemed to take
+up a good deal of her attention. Of course you guess what that was&mdash;but
+Pepper had never seen a baby before, and he took it as a personal slight
+and was dreadfully offended. He simply walked straight out of the room
+and downstairs to the kitchen, where he stayed for days.</p>
+
+<p>'I don't think he enjoyed his sulk much, poor doggie; perhaps he had an
+idea that when they saw how much he took it to heart they would send the
+baby away. But as time went on and this didn't<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_280" id="Page_280">[Pg 280]</a></span> seem to occur to them,
+he decided to come out of the sulks and look over the matter, and he
+came back quite prepared to resume the old footing. Only everything was
+different. No one seemed to notice that he was in the room now, and his
+mistress never invited him to have a game; she even forgot to have him
+washed&mdash;and one of his peculiarities was that he had no objection to
+soap and warm water. The worst of it was, too, that before very long the
+baby followed him into the sitting-room, and, do what he could, he
+couldn't make the stupid little thing understand that it had no business
+there. If you think of it, a baby must strike a dog as a very inferior
+little animal: it can't bark (well, yes, it <i>can</i> howl), but it's no
+good whatever with rats, and yet everybody makes a tremendous fuss about
+it! The baby got all poor Pepper's bows now; and his mistress played
+games with it, though Pepper felt he could have done it ever so much
+better, but he was never allowed to join in. So he used to lie on a rug
+and pretend he didn't mind, though, really, I'm certain he felt it
+horribly. I always believe, you know, that people never give dogs half
+credit enough for feeling things, don't you?</p>
+
+<p>'Well, at last came the worst indignity of all: Pepper was driven from
+his rug&mdash;his own particular rug&mdash;to make room for the baby; and when he
+had got away into a corner to cry quietly, all by himself, that wretched
+baby came and crawled after him and pulled his tail!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_281" id="Page_281">[Pg 281]</a></span></p><p>'He always <i>had</i> been particular about his tail, and never allowed
+anybody to touch it but very intimate friends, and even then under
+protest, so you can imagine how insulted he felt.</p>
+
+<p>'It was too much for him, and he lost the last scrap of temper he had.
+They said he bit the baby, and I'm afraid he did&mdash;though not enough
+really to hurt it; still, it howled fearfully, of course, and from that
+moment it was all over with poor Pepper&mdash;he was a ruined dog!</p>
+
+<p>'When his master came home that evening he was told the whole story.
+Pepper's mistress said she would be ever so sorry to part with him, but,
+after his misbehaviour, she should never know a moment's peace until he
+was out of the house&mdash;it really wasn't safe for baby!</p>
+
+<p>'And his master was sorry, naturally; but I suppose he was beginning
+rather to like the baby himself, and so the end of it was that Pepper
+had to go. They did all they could for him; found him a comfortable
+home, with a friend who was looking out for a good house-dog, and wasn't
+particular about breed, and, after that, they heard nothing of him for a
+long while. And, when they did hear, it was rather a bad report: the
+friend could do nothing with Pepper at all; he had to tie him up in the
+stable, and then he snapped at everyone who came near, and howled all
+night&mdash;they were really almost afraid of him.</p>
+
+<p>'So when Pepper's mistress heard that, she felt<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_282" id="Page_282">[Pg 282]</a></span> more thankful than ever
+that the dog had been sent away, and tried to think no more about him.
+She had quite forgotten all about it, when, one day, a new nursemaid,
+who had taken the baby out for an airing, came back with a terrible
+account of a savage dog which had attacked them, and leaped up at the
+perambulator so persistently that it was as much as she could do to
+drive it away. And even then Pepper's mistress did not associate the dog
+with him; she thought he had been destroyed long ago.</p>
+
+<p>'But the next time the nurse went out with the baby she took a thick
+stick with her, in case the dog should come again. And no sooner had she
+lifted the perambulator over the step, than the dog <i>did</i> come again,
+exactly as if he had been lying in wait for them ever since outside the
+gate.</p>
+
+<p>'The nurse was a strong country girl, with plenty of pluck, and as the
+dog came leaping and barking about in a very alarming way, she hit him
+as hard as she could on his head. The wonder is she did not kill him on
+the spot, and, as it was, the blow turned him perfectly giddy and silly
+for a time, and he ran round and round in a dazed sort of way&mdash;do you
+think you could lower that candle-shade just a little? Thanks!' she
+broke off suddenly, as I obeyed. 'Well, she was going to strike again,
+when her mistress rushed out, just in time to stop her. For, you see,
+she had been watching at the window, and although the poor beast was
+miserably thin, and rough, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_283" id="Page_283">[Pg 283]</a></span> neglected-looking, she knew at once that
+it must be Pepper, and that he was not in the least mad or dangerous,
+but only trying his best to make his peace with the baby. Very likely
+his dignity or his conscience or something wouldn't let him come back
+quite at once, you know; and perhaps he thought he had better get the
+baby on his side first. And then all at once, his mistress&mdash;I heard all
+this through her, of course&mdash;his mistress suddenly remembered how
+devoted Pepper had been to her, and how fond she had once been of him,
+and when she saw him standing, stupid and shivering, there, her heart
+softened to him, and she went to make it up with him, and tell him that
+he was forgiven and should come back and be her dog again, just as in
+the old days!&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>Here she broke off for a moment. I did not venture to look at her, but I
+thought her voice trembled a little when she spoke again. 'I don't quite
+know <i>why</i> I tell you all this. There was a time when I never could bear
+the end of it myself,' she said; 'but I have begun, and I will finish
+now. Well, Pepper's mistress went towards him, and called him;
+but&mdash;whether he was still too dizzy to quite understand who she was, or
+whether his pride came uppermost again, poor dear! I don't know&mdash;but he
+gave her just one look (she says she will never forget it&mdash;never; it
+went straight to her heart), and then he walked very slowly and
+deliberately away.</p>
+
+<p>'She couldn't bear it; she followed; she felt she<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_284" id="Page_284">[Pg 284]</a></span> simply <i>must</i> make
+him understand how very, very sorry she was for him; but the moment he
+heard her he began to run faster and faster, until he was out of reach
+and out of sight, and she had to come back. I know she was crying
+bitterly by that time.'</p>
+
+<p>'And he never came back again?' I asked, after a silence.</p>
+
+<p>'Never again!' she said softly; 'that was the very last they ever saw or
+heard of him. And&mdash;and I've always loved every dog since for Pepper's
+sake!'</p>
+
+<p>'I'm almost glad he did decline to come back,' I declared; 'it served
+his mistress right&mdash;she didn't deserve anything else!'</p>
+
+<p>'Ah, I didn't want you to say that!' she protested; 'she never meant to
+be so unkind&mdash;it was all for the baby's sake!'</p>
+
+<p>I was distinctly astonished, for all her sympathy in telling the story
+had seemed to lie in the other direction.</p>
+
+<p>'You don't mean to say,' I cried involuntarily, 'that you can find any
+excuses for her? I did not expect <i>you</i> would take the baby's part!'</p>
+
+<p>'But I did,' she confessed, with lowered eyes&mdash;'I <i>did</i> take the baby's
+part&mdash;it was all my doing that Pepper was sent away&mdash;I have been sorry
+enough for it since!'</p>
+
+<p>It was her own story she had been telling at second-hand after all&mdash;and
+she was not Miss So-and-so! I had entirely forgotten the existence of
+any<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_285" id="Page_285">[Pg 285]</a></span> other members of the party but our two selves, but at the moment of
+this discovery&mdash;which was doubly painful&mdash;I was recalled by a general
+rustle to the fact that we were at a dinner-party, and that our hostess
+had just given the signal.</p>
+
+<p>As I rose and drew back my chair to allow my neighbour to pass, she
+raised her eyes for a moment and said almost meekly:</p>
+
+<p>'I <i>was</i> the baby, you see!'</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_286" id="Page_286">[Pg 286]</a></span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="MARJORY" id="MARJORY"></a><i>MARJORY</i></h2>
+
+<h3>INTRODUCTION</h3>
+
+<p>I have thought myself justified in printing the following narrative,
+found among the papers of my dead friend, Douglas Cameron, who left me
+discretion to deal with them as I saw fit. It was written indeed, as its
+opening words imply, rather for his own solace and relief than with the
+expectation that it would be read by any other. But, painful and
+intimate as it is in parts, I cannot think that any harm will be done by
+printing it now, with some necessary alterations in the names of the
+characters chiefly concerned.</p>
+
+<p>Before, however, leaving the story to speak for itself, I should like to
+state, in justice to my friend, that during the whole of my acquaintance
+with him, which began in our college days, I never saw anything to
+indicate the morbid timidity and weakness of character that seem to have
+marked him as a boy. Reserved he undoubtedly was, with a taste for
+solitude that made him shrink from the society of all but a small
+circle, and with a sensitive and shy nature which prevented him from
+doing himself complete<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_287" id="Page_287">[Pg 287]</a></span> justice; but he was very capable of holding his
+own on occasion, and in his disposition, as I knew it, there was no want
+of moral courage, nor any trace of effeminacy.</p>
+
+<p>How far he may have unconsciously exaggerated such failings in the
+revelation of his earlier self, or what the influence of such an
+experience as he relates may have done to strengthen the moral fibre,
+are points on which I can express no opinion, any more than I can pledge
+myself to the credibility of the supernatural element of his story.</p>
+
+<p>It may be that only in the boy's overwrought imagination, the innocent
+Child-spirit came back to complete the work of love and pity she had
+begun in life; but I know that he himself believed otherwise, and,
+truly, if those who leave us are permitted to return at all, it must be
+on some such errand as Marjory's.</p>
+
+<p>Douglas Cameron's life was short, and in it, so far as I am aware, he
+met no one who at all replaced his lost ideal. Of this I cannot be
+absolutely certain, for he was a reticent man in such matters; but I
+think, had it been so, I should have known of it, for we were very close
+friends. One would hardly expect, perhaps, that an ordinary man would
+remain faithful all his days to the far-off memory of a child-love; but
+then Cameron was not quite as other men, nor were his days long in the
+land.</p>
+
+<p>And if this ideal of his was never dimmed for him<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_288" id="Page_288">[Pg 288]</a></span> by some grosser, and
+less spiritual, passion, who shall say that he may not have been a
+better and even a happier man in consequence.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>It is not without an effort that I have resolved to break, in the course
+of this narrative, the reserve maintained for nearly twenty years. But
+the chief reason for silence is removed now that all those are gone who
+might have been pained or harmed by what I have to tell, and, though I
+shrink still from reviving certain memories that are fraught with pain,
+there are others associated therewith which will surely bring
+consolation and relief.</p>
+
+<p>I must have been about eleven at the time I am speaking of, and the
+change which&mdash;for good or ill&mdash;comes over most boys' lives had not yet
+threatened mine. I had not left home for school, nor did it seem at all
+probable then that I should ever do so.</p>
+
+<p>When I read (I was a great reader) of Dotheboys Hall and Salem House&mdash;a
+combination of which establishments formed my notion of school-life&mdash;it
+was with no more personal interest than a cripple might feel in perusing
+the notice of an impending conscription; for from the battles of
+school-life I was fortunately exempted.</p>
+
+<p>I was the only son of a widow, and we led a secluded life in a London
+suburb. My mother took charge of my education herself, and, as far as
+mere acquirements went, I was certainly not behind other<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_289" id="Page_289">[Pg 289]</a></span> boys of my
+age. I owe too much to that loving and careful training, Heaven knows,
+to think of casting any reflection upon it here, but my surroundings
+were such as almost necessarily to exclude all bracing and hardening
+influences.</p>
+
+<p>My mother had few friends; we were content with our own companionship,
+and of boys I knew and cared to know nothing; in fact, I regarded a
+strange boy with much the same unreasoning aversion as many excellent
+women feel for the most ordinary cow.</p>
+
+<p>I was happy to think that I should never be called upon to associate
+with them; by-and-by, when I outgrew my mother's teaching, I was to have
+a tutor, perhaps even go to college in time, and when I became a man I
+was to be a curate and live with my mother in a clematis-covered cottage
+in some pleasant village.</p>
+
+<p>She would often dwell on this future with a tender prospective pride;
+she spoke of it on the very day that saw it shattered for ever.</p>
+
+<p>For there came a morning when, on going to her with my lessons for the
+day, I was gladdened with an unexpected holiday. I little knew
+then&mdash;though I was to learn it soon enough&mdash;that my lessons had been all
+holidays, or that on that day they were to end for ever.</p>
+
+<p>My mother had had one or two previous attacks of an illness which seemed
+to prostrate her for a short period, and as she soon regained her
+ordinary health, I did not think they could be of a serious nature.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_290" id="Page_290">[Pg 290]</a></span></p><p>So I devoted my holiday cheerfully enough to the illumination of a
+text, on the gaudy colouring of which I found myself gazing two days
+later with a dull wonder, as at the work of a strange hand in a long
+dead past, for the boy who had painted that was a happy boy who had a
+mother, and for two endless days I had been alone.</p>
+
+<p>Those days, and many that followed, come back to me now but vaguely. I
+passed them mostly in a state of blank bewilderment caused by the double
+sense of sameness and strangeness in everything around me; then there
+were times when this gave way to a passionate anguish which refused all
+attempts at comfort, and times even&mdash;but very, very seldom&mdash;when I
+almost forgot what had happened to me.</p>
+
+<p>Our one servant remained in the house with me, and a friend and
+neighbour of my mother's was constant in her endeavours to relieve my
+loneliness; but I was impatient of them, I fear, and chiefly anxious to
+be left alone to indulge my melancholy unchecked.</p>
+
+<p>I remember how, as autumn began, and leaf after leaf fluttered down from
+the trees in our little garden, I watched them fall with a heavier
+heart, for they had known my mother, and now they, too, were deserting
+me.</p>
+
+<p>This morbid state of mind had lasted quite long enough when my uncle,
+who was my guardian, saw fit to put a summary end to it by sending me
+to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_291" id="Page_291">[Pg 291]</a></span> school forthwith; he would have softened the change for me by taking
+me to his own home first, but there was illness of some sort there, and
+this was out of the question.</p>
+
+<p>I was neither sorry nor glad when I heard of it, for all places were the
+same to me just then; only, as the time drew near, I began to regard the
+future with a growing dread.</p>
+
+<p>The school was at some distance from London, and my uncle took me down
+by rail; but the only fact I remember connected with the journey is that
+there was a boy in the carriage with us who cracked walnuts all the way,
+and I wondered if he was going to school too, and concluded that he was
+not, or he would hardly eat quite so many walnuts.</p>
+
+<p>Later we were passing through some wrought-iron gates, and down an
+avenue of young chestnuts, which made a gorgeous autumn canopy of
+scarlet, amber, and orange, up to a fine old red-brick house, with a
+high-pitched roof, and a cupola in which a big bell hung, tinted a warm
+gold by the afternoon sun.</p>
+
+<p>This was my school, and it did not look so very-terrible after all.
+There was a big bow-window by the pillared portico, and, looking timidly
+in, I saw a girl of about my own age sitting there, absorbed in the book
+she was reading, her long brown hair drooping over her cheek and the
+hand on which it rested.</p>
+
+<p>She glanced up at the sound of the door-bell, and I felt her eyes
+examining me seriously and critically,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_292" id="Page_292">[Pg 292]</a></span> and then I forgot everything but
+the fact that I was about to be introduced to my future schoolmaster,
+the Rev. Basil Dering.</p>
+
+<p>This was less of an ordeal than I had expected; he had a strong,
+massively-cut, leonine face, free and abundant white hair, streaked with
+dark grey, but there was a kind light in his eyes as I looked up at
+them, and the firm mouth could smile, I found, pleasantly enough.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Dering seemed younger, and was handsome, with a certain stateliness
+and decision of manner which put me less at my ease, and I was relieved
+to be told I might say good-bye to my uncle, and wander about the
+grounds as I liked.</p>
+
+<p>I was not surprised to pass through an empty schoolroom, and to descend
+by some steep stairs to a deserted playground, for we had been already
+told that the Michaelmas holidays were not over, and that the boys would
+not return for some days to come.</p>
+
+<p>It gave me a kind of satisfaction to think of my resemblance, just then,
+to my favourite David Copperfield, but I was to have a far pleasanter
+companion than poor lugubrious, flute-tootling Mr. Mell, for as I paced
+the damp paths paved with a mosaic of russet and yellow leaves, I heard
+light footsteps behind me, and turned to find myself face to face with
+the girl I had seen at the window.</p>
+
+<p>She stood there breathless for an instant, for she had hurried to
+overtake me, and against a background<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_293" id="Page_293">[Pg 293]</a></span> of crimson creepers I saw the
+brilliant face, with its soft but fearless brown eyes, small straight
+nose, spirited mouth, and crisp wavy golden-brown hair, which I see now
+almost as distinctly as I write.</p>
+
+<p>'You're the new boy,' she said at length. 'I've come out to make you
+feel more at home. I suppose you don't feel <i>quite</i> at home just yet?'</p>
+
+<p>'Not quite, thank you,' I said, lifting my cap with ceremony, for I had
+been taught to be particular about my manners; 'I have never been to
+school before, you see, Miss Dering.'</p>
+
+<p>I think she was a little puzzled by so much politeness. 'I know,' she
+said softly; 'mother told me about it, and I'm very sorry. And I'm
+called Marjory, generally. Shall you like school, do you think?'</p>
+
+<p>'I might,' said I, 'if&mdash;if it wasn't for the boys!'</p>
+
+<p>'Boys aren't bad,' she said; 'ours are rather nice, I think. But perhaps
+you don't know many?'</p>
+
+<p>'I know one,' I replied.</p>
+
+<p>'How old is <i>he</i>?' she wished to know.</p>
+
+<p>'Not very old&mdash;about three, I think,' I said. I had never wished till
+then that my only male acquaintance had been of less tender years, but I
+felt now that he was rather small, and saw that Marjory was of the same
+opinion.</p>
+
+<p>'Why, he's only a baby!' she said; 'I thought you meant a <i>real</i> boy.
+And is that all the boys you know? Are you fond of games?'</p>
+
+<p>'Some games&mdash;very,' said I.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_294" id="Page_294">[Pg 294]</a></span></p><p>'What's your favourite game?' she demanded.</p>
+
+<p>'Bezique,' I answered, 'or draughts.'</p>
+
+<p>'I meant <i>out</i>door games; draughts are indoor games&mdash;<i>is</i> indoor games,
+I mean&mdash;no, <i>are</i> an indoor game&mdash;and <i>that</i> doesn't sound grammar! But
+haven't you ever played cricket? Not ever, really? I like it dreadfully
+myself, only I'm not allowed to play with the boys, and I'm sure I can
+bat well enough for the second eleven&mdash;Cartwright said I could last
+term&mdash;and I can bowl round-hand, and it's all no use, just because I was
+born a girl! Wouldn't you like a game at something? They haven't taken
+in the croquet hoops yet; shall we play at that?'</p>
+
+<p>But again I had to confess my ignorance of what was then the popular
+garden game.</p>
+
+<p>'What do you generally do to amuse yourself, then?' she inquired.</p>
+
+<p>'I read, generally, or paint texts or outlines. Sometimes'&mdash;(I thought
+this accomplishment would surely appeal to her)&mdash;'sometimes I do
+woolwork!'</p>
+
+<p>'I don't think I would tell the boys that,' she advised rather gravely;
+she evidently considered me a very desperate case. 'It's such a pity,
+your not knowing any games. Suppose I taught you croquet, now? It would
+be something to go on with, and you'll soon learn if you pay attention
+and do exactly what I tell you.'</p>
+
+<p>I submitted myself meekly to her direction, and Marjory enjoyed her
+office of instructress for a time,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_295" id="Page_295">[Pg 295]</a></span> until my extreme slowness wore out
+her patience, and she began to make little murmurs of disgust, for which
+she invariably apologised. 'That's enough for to-day!' she said at last,
+'I'll take you again to-morrow. But you really must try and pick up
+games, Cameron, or you'll never be liked. Let me see, I wonder if
+there's time to teach you a little football. I think I could do that.'</p>
+
+<p>Before she could make any further arrangements the tea-bell rang, but
+when I lay down that night in my strange cold bed, hemmed round by other
+beds, which were only less formidable than if they had been occupied, I
+did not feel so friendless as I might have done, and dreamed all night
+that Marjory was teaching me something I understood to be cricket,
+which, however, was more like a bloated kind of backgammon.</p>
+
+<p>The next day Marjory was allowed to go out walking with me, and I came
+home feeling that I had known her for quite a long time, while her
+manner to me had acquired a tone even more protecting than before, and
+she began to betray an anxiety as to my school prospects which filled me
+with uneasiness.</p>
+
+<p>'I am so afraid the boys won't like the way you talk,' she said on one
+occasion.</p>
+
+<p>'I used to be told I spoke very correctly,' I said, verdantly enough.</p>
+
+<p>'But not like boys talk. You see, Cameron, I ought to know, with such a
+lot of them about. I tell you what I could do, though&mdash;I could teach you
+most<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_296" id="Page_296">[Pg 296]</a></span> of their words&mdash;only I must run and ask mother first if I may.
+Teaching slang isn't the same as using it on my own account, is it?'</p>
+
+<p>Marjory darted off impulsively to ask leave, to return presently with a
+slow step and downcast face. 'I mayn't,' she announced. 'Mother says
+"Certainly not," so there's an end of that! Still, I think myself it's a
+decided pity.'</p>
+
+<p>And more than once that day she would observe, as if to herself, 'I do
+wish they had let him come to school in different collars!'</p>
+
+<p>I knew that these remarks, and others of a similar tendency, were
+prompted by her interest in my welfare, and I admired her too heartily
+already to be offended by them: still, I cannot say they added to my
+peace of mind.</p>
+
+<p>And on the last evening of the holidays she said 'Good-night' to me with
+some solemnity. 'Everything will be different after this,' she said; 'I
+shan't be able to see nearly so much of you, because I'm not allowed to
+be much with the boys. But I shall be looking after you all the time,
+Cameron, and seeing how you get on. And oh! I do hope you will try to be
+a popular kind of boy!'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>I'm afraid I must own that this desire of Marjory's was not realised. I
+do not know that I tried to be&mdash;and I certainly was not&mdash;a popular boy.</p>
+
+<p>The other boys, I now know, were by no means<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_297" id="Page_297">[Pg 297]</a></span> bad specimens of the
+English schoolboy, as will be evident when I state that, for a time, my
+deep mourning was held by them to give me a claim to their forbearance.</p>
+
+<p>But I had an unfortunate tendency to sudden floods of tears (apparently
+for no cause whatever, really from some secret spring of association,
+such as I remember was touched when I first found myself learning Latin
+from the same primer over which my mother and I had puzzled together),
+and these outbursts at first aroused my companions' contempt, and
+finally their open ridicule.</p>
+
+<p>I could not conceal my shrinking dislike to their society, which was not
+calculated to make them more favourably disposed towards me; while my
+tastes, my expressions, my ways of looking at things, were all at total
+variance with their own standards.</p>
+
+<p>The general disapproval might well have shown itself in a harsher manner
+than that of merely ignoring my existence&mdash;and it says much for the tone
+of the school that it did not; unfortunately, I felt their indifference
+almost as keenly as I had dreaded their notice.</p>
+
+<p>From my masters I met with more favour, for I had been thoroughly well
+grounded, and found, besides, a temporary distraction in my school-work;
+but this was hardly likely to render me more beloved by my fellows, and
+so it came to pass that every day saw my isolation more complete.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_298" id="Page_298">[Pg 298]</a></span></p><p>Something, however, made me anxious to hide this from Marjory's eyes,
+and whenever she happened to be looking on at us in the school grounds
+or the playing fields, I made dismal attempts to appear on terms of
+equality with the rest, and would hang about a group with as much
+pretence of belonging to it as I thought at all prudent.</p>
+
+<p>If she had had more opportunities of questioning me, she would have
+found me out long before; as it was, the only occasion on which we were
+near one another was at the weekly drawing lesson, when, although she
+drew less and talked more than the Professor quite approved of, she was
+obliged to restrict herself to a conversation which did not admit of
+confidences.</p>
+
+<p>But this negative neutral-tinted misery was not to last; I was harmless
+enough, but then to some natures nothing is so offensive as
+inoffensiveness. My isolation was certain to raise me up an enemy in
+time, and he came in the person of one Clarence Ormsby.</p>
+
+<p>He was a sturdy, good-looking fellow, about two years older than myself,
+good at games, and, though not brilliant in other respects, rather idle
+than dull. He was popular in the school, and I believe his general
+disposition was by no means bad; but there must have been some hidden
+flaw in his nature which might never have disclosed itself for any other
+but me.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_299" id="Page_299">[Pg 299]</a></span></p><p>For me he had displayed, almost from the first, one of those special
+antipathies that want but little excuse to ripen into hatred. My
+personal appearance&mdash;I had the misfortune to be a decidedly plain
+boy&mdash;happened to be particularly displeasing to him, and, as he had an
+unsparing tongue, he used it to cover me with ridicule, until gradually,
+finding that I did not retaliate, he indulged in acts of petty
+oppression which, though not strictly bullying, were even more harassing
+and humiliating.</p>
+
+<p>I suspect now that if I had made ever so slight a stand at the outset, I
+should have escaped further molestation, but I was not pugnacious by
+nature, and never made the experiment; partly, probably, from a theory
+on which I had been reared, that all violence was vulgar, but chiefly
+from a tendency, unnatural in one of my age and sex, to find a
+sentimental satisfaction in a certain degree of unhappiness.</p>
+
+<p>So that I can neither pity myself nor expect pity from others for woes
+which were so essentially my own creation, though they resulted, alas!
+in misery that was real enough.</p>
+
+<p>It was inevitable that quick-sighted Marjory should discover the
+subjection into which I had fallen, and her final enlightenment was
+brought about in this manner. Ormsby and I were together alone, shortly
+before morning school, and he came towards me with an exercise of mine
+from which he had just been copying his own, for we were in the same
+classes,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_300" id="Page_300">[Pg 300]</a></span> despite the difference in our ages, and he was in the habit of
+profiting thus by my industry.</p>
+
+<p>'Thanks, Cameron,' he said, with a sweetness which I distrusted, for he
+was not as a rule so lavish in his gratitude. 'I've copied out that
+exercise of yours, but it's written so beastly badly that you'd better
+do it over again.'</p>
+
+<p>With which he deliberately tore the page he had been copying from to
+scraps, which he threw in my face, and strolled out down to the
+playground.</p>
+
+<p>I was preparing submissively to do the exercise over again as well as I
+could in the short time that was left, when I was startled by a low cry
+of indignation, and, looking round, saw Marjory standing in the doorway,
+and knew by her face that she had seen all.</p>
+
+<p>'Has Ormsby done that to you before?' she inquired.</p>
+
+<p>'Once or twice he has,' said I.</p>
+
+<p>'And you let him!' she cried. 'Oh, Cameron!'</p>
+
+<p>'What can I do?' I said.</p>
+
+<p>'I know what <i>I</i> would do,' she replied. 'I would slap his face, or
+pinch him. I wouldn't put up with it!'</p>
+
+<p>'Boys don't slap one another, or pinch,' I said, not displeased to find
+a weak place in her knowledge of us.</p>
+
+<p>'Well, they do <i>something</i>!' she said; 'a real boy would. But I don't
+think you are a real boy, Cameron.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_301" id="Page_301">[Pg 301]</a></span> <i>I'll</i> show you what to do. Where's
+the exercise that&mdash;that <i>pig</i> copied? Ah! I see it. And now&mdash;look!'
+(Here she tore his page as he had torn mine.)</p>
+
+<p>'Now for an envelope!' and from the Doctor's own desk she took an
+envelope, in which she placed the fragments, and wrote on the outside in
+her round, childish hand: 'With Marjory's compliments, for being a
+bully.'</p>
+
+<p>'He won't do that again,' she said gleefully.</p>
+
+<p>'He'll do worse,' I said in dismay; 'I shall have to pay for it.
+Marjory, why didn't you leave things alone? I didn't complain&mdash;you know
+I didn't.'</p>
+
+<p>She turned upon me, as well she might, in supreme disdain. 'Oh! what a
+coward you are! I wouldn't believe all Cartwright told me about you when
+I asked&mdash;but I see it's all true. Why don't you stick up for yourself?'</p>
+
+<p>I muttered something or other.</p>
+
+<p>'But you <i>ought</i> to. You'll never get on unless,' said Marjory, very
+decidedly. 'Now, promise me you will, next time.'</p>
+
+<p>I sat there silent. I was disgusted with myself, and meanly angry with
+her for having rendered me so.</p>
+
+<p>'Then, listen,' she said impressively. 'I promised I would look after
+you, and I did mean to, but it's no use if you won't help yourself. So,
+unless you say you won't go on being a coward any more, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_302" id="Page_302">[Pg 302]</a></span> shall have to
+leave you to your own way, and not take the least interest in you ever
+again.'</p>
+
+<p>'Then, you may,' I said stolidly; 'I don't care.' I wondered, even while
+I spoke the words, what could be impelling me to treat spirited,
+warm-hearted Marjory like that, and I hate myself still at the
+recollection.</p>
+
+<p>'Good-bye, then,' she said very quietly; 'I'm sorry, Cameron.' And she
+went out without another word.</p>
+
+<p>When Ormsby came in, I watched him apprehensively as he read the
+envelope upon his desk and saw its contents. He said nothing, however,
+though he shot a malignant glance in my direction; but the lesson was
+not lost upon him, for from that time he avoided all open ill-treatment
+of me, and even went so far as to assume a friendliness which might have
+reassured me had I not instinctively felt that it merely masked the old
+dislike.</p>
+
+<p>I was constantly the victim of mishaps, in the shape of missing and
+defaced books, ink mysteriously spilt or strangely adulterated, and,
+though I could never trace them to any definite hand, they seemed too
+systematic to be quite accidental; still I made no sign, and hoped thus
+to disarm my persecutor&mdash;if persecutor there were.</p>
+
+<p>As for my companions, I knew that in no case would they take the trouble
+to interfere in my behalf; they had held aloof from the first, the
+general opinion<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_303" id="Page_303">[Pg 303]</a></span> (which I now perceive was not unjust) being that 'I
+deserved all I got.'</p>
+
+<p>And my estrangement from Marjory grew wider and wider; she never spoke
+to me now when we sat near one another at the drawing-class; if she
+looked at me it was by stealth, and with a glance that I thought
+sometimes was contemptuously pitiful, and sometimes half fancied
+betrayed a willingness to return to the old comradeship.</p>
+
+<p>But I nursed my stupid, sullen pride, though my heart ached with it at
+times. For I had now come to love Marjory devotedly, with a love that,
+though I was a boy and she was a child, was as genuine as any I am ever
+likely to feel again.</p>
+
+<p>The chance of seeing her now and then, of hearing her speak&mdash;though it
+was not to me&mdash;gave me the one interest in my life, which, but for her,
+I could hardly have borne. But this love of mine was a very far-off and
+disinterested worship after all. I could not imagine myself ever
+speaking of it to her, or picture her as accepting it. Marjory was too
+thorough a child to be vulgarised in that way, even in thought.</p>
+
+<p>The others were healthy, matter-of-fact youths, to whom Marjory was an
+ordinary girl, and who certainly did not indulge in any strained
+sentiment respecting her; it was left for me to idealise her; but of
+that, at least, I cannot feel ashamed, or believe that it did me
+anything but good.</p>
+
+<p>And the days went on, until it wanted but a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_304" id="Page_304">[Pg 304]</a></span> fortnight to Christmas, and
+most of us were thinking of the coming holidays, and preparing with a
+not unpleasant excitement for the examinations, which were all that
+barred the way to them now. I was to spend my Christmas with my uncle
+and cousins, who would by that time be able to receive me; but I felt no
+very pleasurable anticipations, for my cousins were all boys, and from
+boys I thought I knew what to expect.</p>
+
+<p>One afternoon Ormsby came to me with the request that I would execute a
+trifling commission for him in the adjoining village; he himself, he
+said, was confined to bounds, but he had a shilling he wanted to lay out
+at a small fancy-shop we were allowed to patronise, and he considered me
+the best person to be entrusted with that coin. I was simply to spend
+the money on anything I thought best, for he had entire confidence, he
+gave me to understand, in my taste and judgment. I think I suspected a
+design of some sort, but I did not dare to refuse, and then his manner
+to some extent disarmed me.</p>
+
+<p>I took the shilling, therefore, with which I bought some article&mdash;I
+forget what&mdash;and got back to the school at dusk. The boys had all gone
+down to tea except Ormsby, who was waiting for me up in the empty
+schoolroom.</p>
+
+<p>'Well?' he said, and I displayed my purchase, only to find that I had
+fallen into a trap.</p>
+
+<p>When I think how easily I was the dupe of that<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_305" id="Page_305">[Pg 305]</a></span> not too subtle artifice,
+which was only half malicious, I could smile, if I did not know how it
+ended.</p>
+
+<p>'How much was that?' he asked contemptuously, 'twopence-halfpenny? Well,
+if you choose to give a shilling for it, I'm not going to pay, that's
+all. So just give me back my shilling!'</p>
+
+<p>Now, as my weekly allowance consisted of threepence, which was
+confiscated for some time in advance (as I think he knew), to provide
+fines for my mysteriously-stained dictionaries, this was out of the
+question, as I represented.</p>
+
+<p>'Then go back to the shop and change it,' said he; 'I won't have that
+thing!'</p>
+
+<p>'Tell me what you would like instead, and I will,' I stipulated, not
+unreasonably.</p>
+
+<p>He laughed; his little scheme was working so admirably. 'That's not the
+bargain,' he said; 'you're bound to get me something I like. I'm not
+obliged to tell you what it is.'</p>
+
+<p>But even I was driven to protest against such flagrant unfairness. 'I
+didn't know you meant that,' I said, 'or I'm sure I shouldn't have gone.
+I went to oblige <i>you</i>, Ormsby.'</p>
+
+<p>'No, you didn't,' he said, 'you went because I told you. And you'll go
+again.'</p>
+
+<p>'Not unless you tell me what I'm to get,' I said.</p>
+
+<p>'I tell you what I believe,' he said; 'you never spent the whole
+shilling at all on that; you bought<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_306" id="Page_306">[Pg 306]</a></span> something for yourself with the
+rest, you young swindler! No wonder you won't go back to the shop.'</p>
+
+<p>This was, of course, a mere taunt flung out by his inventive fancy; but
+as he persisted in it, and threatened exposure and a variety of
+consequences, I became alarmed, for I had little doubt that, innocent as
+I was, I could be made very uncomfortable by accusations which would
+find willing hearers.</p>
+
+<p>He stood there enjoying my perplexity and idly twisting a piece of
+string round and round his fingers. At length he said, 'Well, I don't
+want to be hard on you. You may go and change this for me even now, if
+you like. I'll give you three minutes to think it over, and you can come
+down into the playground when I sing out, and tell me what you mean to
+do. And you had better be sharp in coming, too, or it will be the worse
+for you.'</p>
+
+<p>He took his cap, and presently I heard him going down the steps to the
+playground. I would have given worlds to go and join the rest at tea,
+but I did not dare, and remained in the schoolroom, which was dim just
+then, for the gas was lowered; and while I stood there by the fireplace,
+trembling in the cold air which stole in through the door Ormsby had
+left open, Marjory came in by the other one, and was going straight to
+her father's desk, when she saw me.</p>
+
+<p>Her first impulse seemed to be to take no notice, but something in my
+face or attitude made her alter<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_307" id="Page_307">[Pg 307]</a></span> her mind and come straight to me,
+holding out her hand.</p>
+
+<p>'Cameron,' she said, 'shall we be friends again?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes, Marjory,' I said; I could not have said any more just then.</p>
+
+<p>'You look so miserable, I couldn't bear it any longer,' she said, 'so I
+<i>had</i> to make it up. You know, I was only pretending crossness, Cameron,
+all the time, because I really thought it was best. But it doesn't seem
+to have done you much good, and I did promise to take care of you. What
+is it? Ormsby again?'</p>
+
+<p>'Yes,' I said, and told her the story of the commission.</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, you stupid boy!' she cried, 'couldn't you see he only wanted to
+pick a quarrel? And if you change it now, he'll make you change it
+again, and the next time, and the next after that&mdash;I know he will!'</p>
+
+<p>Here Ormsby's voice shouted from below, 'Now then, you, Cameron, time's
+up!'</p>
+
+<p>'What is he doing down there?' asked Marjory, and her indignation rose
+higher when she heard.</p>
+
+<p>'Now, Cameron, be brave; go down and tell him once for all he may just
+keep what he has, and be thankful. Whatever it is, it's good enough for
+<i>him</i>, I'm sure!'</p>
+
+<p>But I still hung back. 'It's no use, Marjory, he'll tell everyone I
+cheated him&mdash;he says he will!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_308" id="Page_308">[Pg 308]</a></span></p><p>'That he shall not!' she cried; 'I won't have it, I'll go myself, and
+tell him what I think of him, and make him stop treating you like this.'</p>
+
+<p>Some faint glimmer of manliness made me ashamed to allow her thus to
+fight my battles. 'No, Marjory, not you!' I said; 'I will go: I'll say
+what you want me to say!'</p>
+
+<p>But it was too late. I saw her for just a second at the door, my
+impetuous, generous little Marjory, as she flung back her pretty hair in
+a certain spirited way she had, and nodded to me encouragingly.</p>
+
+<p>And then&mdash;I can hardly think of it calmly even now&mdash;there came a sharp
+scream, and the sound of a fall, and, after that, silence.</p>
+
+<p>Sick with fear, I rushed to the head of the steps, and looked down into
+the brown gloom.</p>
+
+<p>'Keep where you are for a minute!' I heard Ormsby cry out. 'It's all
+right&mdash;she's not hurt; now you can come down.'</p>
+
+<p>I was down in another instant, at the foot of the stairs, where, in a
+patch of faint light that fell from the door above, lay Marjory, with
+Ormsby bending over her insensible form.</p>
+
+<p>'She's dead!' I cried in my terror, as I saw her white face.</p>
+
+<p>'I tell you she's all right,' said he, impatiently; 'there's nothing to
+make a fuss about. She slipped coming down and cut her forehead&mdash;that's
+all.'</p>
+
+<p>'Marjory, speak to me&mdash;don't look like that; tell<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_309" id="Page_309">[Pg 309]</a></span> me you're not much
+hurt!' I implored her; but she only moaned a little, and her eyes
+remained fast shut.</p>
+
+<p>'It's no use worrying her now, you know,' said Ormsby, more gently.
+'Just help me to get her round to the kitchen door, and tell somebody.'</p>
+
+<p>We carried her there between us, and, amidst a scene of terrible
+confusion and distress, Marjory, still insensible, was carried into the
+library, and a man sent off in hot haste for the surgeon.</p>
+
+<p>A little later Ormsby and I were sent for to the study, where Dr.
+Dering, whose face was white and drawn as I had never seen it before,
+questioned us closely as to our knowledge of the accident.</p>
+
+<p>Ormsby could only say that he was out in the playground, when he saw
+somebody descending the steps, and heard a fall, after which he ran up
+and found Marjory.</p>
+
+<p>'I sent her into the schoolroom to bring my paper-knife,' said the
+Doctor; 'if I had but gone myself&mdash;! But why should she have gone
+outside on a frosty night like this?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, Dr. Dering!' I broke out, 'I'm afraid&mdash;I'm afraid she went for me!'</p>
+
+<p>I saw Ormsby's face as I spoke, and there was a look upon it which made
+me pity him.</p>
+
+<p>'And you sent my poor child out on your errand, Cameron! Could you not
+have done it yourself?'</p>
+
+<p>'I wish I had!' I exclaimed; 'oh, I wish I had!<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_310" id="Page_310">[Pg 310]</a></span> I tried to stop her,
+and then&mdash;and then it was too late. Please tell me, sir, is she badly
+hurt?'</p>
+
+<p>'How can I tell?' he said harshly; 'there, I can't speak of this just
+yet: go, both of you.'</p>
+
+<p>There was little work done at evening preparation that night; the whole
+school was buzzing with curiosity and speculation, as we heard doors
+opening and shutting around, and the wheels of the doctor's gig as it
+rolled up the chestnut avenue.</p>
+
+<p>I sat with my hands shielding my eyes and ears, engaged to all
+appearance with the books before me, while my restless thoughts were
+employed in making earnest resolutions for the future.</p>
+
+<p>At last I saw my cowardice in its true light, and felt impatient to tell
+Marjory that I did so, to prove to her that I had really reformed; but
+when would an opportunity come? I might not see her again for days,
+perhaps not at all till after the holidays; but I would not let myself
+dwell upon such a contingency as that, and, to banish it, tried to
+picture what Marjory would say, and how she would look, when I was
+allowed to see her again.</p>
+
+<p>After evening prayers, read by one of the assistant-masters, for the
+Doctor did not appear again, we were enjoined to go up to our bedrooms
+with as little noise as possible, and we had been in bed some time
+before Sutcliffe, the old butler, came up as usual to put out the
+lights.</p>
+
+<p>On this occasion he was assailed by a fire of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_311" id="Page_311">[Pg 311]</a></span> eager whispers from every
+door: 'Sutcliffe, hi! old Sutty, how is she?' but he did not seem to
+hear, until a cry louder than the rest brought him to our room.</p>
+
+<p>'For God's sake, gentlemen, don't!' he said, in a hoarse whisper, as he
+turned out the light; 'they'll hear you downstairs.'</p>
+
+<p>'But how is she? do you know&mdash;better?'</p>
+
+<p>'Ay,' he said, 'she's better. She'll be over her trouble soon, will Miss
+Marjory!'</p>
+
+<p>A low murmur of delight ran round the room, which the butler tried to
+check in vain.</p>
+
+<p>'Don't!' he said again, 'wait&mdash;wait till morning.... Go to sleep quiet
+now, and I'll come up first thing and tell you.'</p>
+
+<p>He had no sooner turned his back than the general relief broke out
+irrepressibly; Ormsby being especially demonstrative. 'Didn't I tell you
+fellows so?' he said triumphantly; 'as if it was likely a plucky girl
+like Marjory would mind a little cut like that. She'll be all right in
+the morning, you see!'</p>
+
+<p>But this confidence jarred upon me, who could not pretend to share it,
+until I was unable to restrain the torturing anxiety I felt.</p>
+
+<p>'You're wrong&mdash;all of you!' I cried, 'I'm sure she's not better. Didn't
+you hear how Sutcliffe said it? She's <i>worse</i>&mdash;she may even be dying!'</p>
+
+<p>I met with the usual treatment of a prophet of evil. 'You young muff,' I
+was told on all sides, 'who<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_312" id="Page_312">[Pg 312]</a></span> asked your opinion? Who are you, to know
+better than anyone else?'</p>
+
+<p>Ormsby attacked me hotly for trying to excite a groundless alarm, and I
+was recommended to hold my tongue and go to sleep.</p>
+
+<p>I said no more, but I could not sleep; the others dropped off one by
+one, Ormsby being the last; but I lay awake listening and thinking,
+until the dread and suspense grew past bearing. I <i>must</i> know the truth.
+I would go down and find the Doctor, and beg him to tell me; he might be
+angry and punish me&mdash;but that would be nothing in comparison with the
+relief of knowing my fear was unfounded.</p>
+
+<p>Stealthily I slipped out of bed, stole through the dim room to the door,
+and down the old staircase, which creaked under my bare feet. The dog in
+the yard howled as I passed the big window, through which the stars were
+sparkling frostily in the keen blue sky. Outside the room in which
+Marjory lay, I listened, but could hear nothing. At least she was
+sleeping, then, and, relieved already, I went on down to the hall.</p>
+
+<p>The big clock on a table there was ticking solemnly, like a slow
+footfall; the lamp was alight, so the Doctor must be still up. With a
+heart that beat loudly I went to his study door and lifted my hand to
+knock, when from within rose a sound at which the current of my blood
+stopped and ran backwards&mdash;the terrible, heartbroken grief of a grown
+man.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_313" id="Page_313">[Pg 313]</a></span></p><p>Boy as I was, I felt that an agony like that was sacred; besides, I
+knew the worst then.</p>
+
+<p>I dragged myself upstairs again, cold to the bones, with a brain that
+was frozen too. My one desire was to reach my bed, cover my face, and
+let the tears flow; though, when I did regain it, no tears and no
+thoughts came. I lay there and shivered for some time, with a stony,
+stunned sensation, and then I slept&mdash;as if Marjory were well.</p>
+
+<p>The next morning the bell under the cupola did not clang, and Sutcliffe
+came up with the direction that we were to go down very quietly, and not
+to draw up the window-blinds; and then we all knew what had happened
+during the night.</p>
+
+<p>There was a very genuine grief, though none knew Marjory as I had known
+her; the more emotional wept, the older ones indulged in little
+semi-pious conventional comments, oddly foreign to their usual tone;
+all&mdash;even the most thoughtless&mdash;felt the same hush and awe overtake
+them.</p>
+
+<p>I could not cry; I felt nothing, except a dull rage at my own
+insensibility. Marjory was dead&mdash;and I had no tears.</p>
+
+<p>Morning school was a mere pretence that day; we dreaded, for almost the
+first time, to see the Doctor's face, but he did not show himself, and
+the arrangements necessary for the breaking-up of the school were made
+by the matron.</p>
+
+<p>Some, including Ormsby and myself, could not<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_314" id="Page_314">[Pg 314]</a></span> be taken in for some days,
+during which we had to remain at the school: days of shadow and
+monotony, with occasional ghastly outbreaks of the high spirits which
+nothing could repress, even in that house of mourning.</p>
+
+<p>But the time passed at last, until it was the evening of the day on
+which Marjory had been left to her last sleep.</p>
+
+<p>The poor father and mother had been unable to stay in the house now that
+it no longer covered even what had been their child; and the only two,
+besides the matron and a couple of servants who still remained there,
+were Ormsby and I, who were both to leave on the following morning.</p>
+
+<p>I would rather have been alone just then with anyone but Ormsby, though
+he had never since that fatal night taken the slightest notice of me; he
+looked worn and haggard to a degree that made me sure he must have cared
+more for Marjory than I could have imagined, and yet he would break at
+times into a feverish gaiety which surprised and repelled me.</p>
+
+<p>He was in one of these latter moods that evening, as we sat, as far
+apart as possible, in the empty, firelit schoolroom.</p>
+
+<p>'Now, Cameron,' he said, as he came up to me and struck me boisterously
+on the shoulder, 'wake up, man! I've been in the blues long enough. We
+can't go on moping always, on the night before the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_315" id="Page_315">[Pg 315]</a></span> holidays, too! Do
+something to make yourself sociable&mdash;talk, can't you?'</p>
+
+<p>'No, I can't,' I said; and, breaking from him, went to one of the
+windows and looked vacantly out into blackness, which reflected the long
+room, with its dingy greenish maps, and the desks and forms glistening
+in the fire-beams.</p>
+
+<p>The ice-bound state in which I had been so long was slowly passing away,
+now that the scene by the little grave that raw, cheerless morning had
+brought home remorselessly the truth that Marjory was indeed gone&mdash;lost
+to me for ever.</p>
+
+<p>I could see now what she had been to me; how she had made my great
+loneliness endurable; how, with her innocent, fearless nature, she had
+tried to rouse me from spiritless and unmanly dejection. And I could
+never hope to please her now by proving that I had learnt the lesson;
+she had gone from me to some world infinitely removed, in which I was
+forgotten, and my pitiful trials and struggles could be nothing to her
+any more!</p>
+
+<p>I was once more alone, and this second bereavement revived in all its
+crushing desolation the first bitter loss which it so closely followed.</p>
+
+<p>So, as I stood there at the window, my unnatural calm could hold out no
+longer; the long-frozen tears thawed, and I could weep for the first
+time since Marjory died.</p>
+
+<p>But I was not allowed to sorrow undisturbed;<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_316" id="Page_316">[Pg 316]</a></span> I felt a rough grasp on my
+arm, as Ormsby asked me angrily, 'What's the matter now?'</p>
+
+<p>'Oh, Marjory, come to me!' I could only cry; 'I can't bear it! I can't!
+I can't!'</p>
+
+<p>'Stop that, do you hear?' he said savagely, 'I won't have it! Who are
+you to cry about her, when&mdash;but for <i>you</i>&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
+
+<p>He got no farther; the bitter truth in such a taunt, coming from him,
+stung me to ungovernable rage. I turned and struck him full in the
+mouth, which I cut open with my clenched hand.</p>
+
+<p>His eyes became all pupil. 'You shall pay me for that!' he said through
+his teeth; and, forcing me against a desk, he caught up a large T-square
+which lay near; he was far the stronger, and I felt myself powerless in
+his grasp. Passion and pain had made him beside himself for the moment,
+and he did not know how formidable a weapon the heavily-weighted
+instrument might become in his hand.</p>
+
+<p>I shut my eyes: I think I rather hoped he would kill me, and then
+perhaps I might go where Marjory was. I did not cry for help, and it
+would have been useless if I had done so, for the schoolroom was a long
+way from the kitchen and offices of that rambling old house.</p>
+
+<p>But before the expected blow was dealt I felt his grasp relax, and heard
+the instrument fall with a sudden clatter on the floor. 'Look,' he
+whispered, in a voice I did not recognise, '<i>look there</i>!'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_317" id="Page_317">[Pg 317]</a></span></p><p>And when I opened my eyes, I saw Marjory standing between us!</p>
+
+<p>She looked just as I had always seen her: I suppose that even the
+after-life could not make Marjory look purer, or more lovely than she
+was on earth. My first feeling was a wild conviction that it had all
+been some strange mistake&mdash;that Marjory was not dead.</p>
+
+<p>'Marjory, Marjory!' I cried in my joy, 'is it really you? You have come
+back, after all, and it is not true!'</p>
+
+<p>She looked at us both without speaking for a moment; her dear brown eyes
+had lost their old childish sparkle, and were calm and serious as if
+with a deeper knowledge.</p>
+
+<p>Ormsby had cowered back to the opposite wall, covering his face. 'Go
+away!' he gasped. 'Cameron&mdash;<i>you</i> ask her to go. She&mdash;she liked you....
+I never meant it. Tell her I never meant to do it!'</p>
+
+<p>I could not understand such terror at the sight of Marjory, even if she
+had been what he thought her; but there was a reason in his case.</p>
+
+<p>'You were going to hurt Cameron,' said Marjory, at length, and her voice
+sounded sad and grave and far-away.</p>
+
+<p>'I don't care, Marjory,' I cried, 'not now you are here!'</p>
+
+<p>She motioned me back: 'You must not come nearer,' she said. 'I cannot
+stay long, and I must<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_318" id="Page_318">[Pg 318]</a></span> speak to Ormsby. Ormsby, have you told anyone?'</p>
+
+<p>'No,' he said, shaking all over, 'it could do no good.... I thought I
+needn't.'</p>
+
+<p>'Tell <i>him</i>,' said Marjory.</p>
+
+<p>'Must I? Oh, no, no!' he groaned, 'don't make me do that!'</p>
+
+<p>'You must,' she answered, and he turned to me with a sullen fear.</p>
+
+<p>'It was like this,' he began; 'that night, when I was waiting for you
+down there&mdash;I had some string, and it struck me, all in a moment, that
+it would be fun to trip you up. I didn't mean to hurt you&mdash;only frighten
+you. I fastened the string across a little way from the bottom. And
+then'&mdash;he had to moisten his lips before he could go on&mdash;'then <i>she</i>
+came down, and I tried to catch her&mdash;and couldn't&mdash;no, I couldn't!'</p>
+
+<p>'Is that all?' asked Marjory, as he stopped short.</p>
+
+<p>'I cut the string and hid it before you came. Now you know, and you may
+tell if you like!'</p>
+
+<p>'Cameron, you will never tell, will you&mdash;as long as he lives?' said
+Marjory. 'You must promise.'</p>
+
+<p>I was horrified by what I had heard; but her eyes were upon me, and I
+promised.</p>
+
+<p>'And you, Ormsby, promise me to be kinder to him after this.'</p>
+
+<p>He could not speak; but he made a sign of assent.</p>
+
+<p>'And now,' said Marjory, 'shake hands with him and forgive him.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_319" id="Page_319">[Pg 319]</a></span></p><p>But I revolted: 'No, Marjory, I can't; not now&mdash;when I know this!'</p>
+
+<p>'Cameron, dear,' she said, 'you won't let me go away sorry, will you?
+and I must go so soon. For my sake, when I wish it so!'</p>
+
+<p>I went to Ormsby, and took his cold, passive hand. 'I do forgive him,
+Marjory,' I said.</p>
+
+<p>She smiled brightly at us both. 'And you won't forget, either of you?'
+she said. 'And, Douglas, you will be brave, and take your own part now.
+Good-bye, good-bye.'</p>
+
+<p>I tried to reach her. 'Don't leave me; take me with you, Marjory&mdash;dear,
+dear Marjory, don't go!' But there was only firelit space where she had
+stood, though the sound of her pleading, pathetic voice was still in the
+air.</p>
+
+<p>Ormsby remained for a few minutes leaning against a desk, with his face
+buried in his arms, and I heard him struggling with his sobs. At last he
+rose, and left the room without a word.</p>
+
+<p>But I stayed there where I had last seen Marjory, till the fire died
+down, and the hour was late, for I was glad to be alone with the new and
+solemn joy that had come to me. For she had not forgotten me where she
+was; I had been allowed to see her once more, and it might even be that
+I should see her again. And I resolved then that when she came she
+should find me more worthy of her.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>From that night my character seemed to enter<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_320" id="Page_320">[Pg 320]</a></span> upon a new phase, and when
+I returned to school it was to begin my second term under better
+auspices.</p>
+
+<p>My cousins had welcomed me cordially among them, and as I mastered the
+lesson of give and take, of respecting one's self in respecting others,
+which I needed to learn, my early difficulties vanished with the
+weakness that had produced them.</p>
+
+<p>By Ormsby I was never again molested; in word and deed, he was true to
+the promise exacted from him during that last strange scene. At first,
+he avoided me as being too painfully connected with the past; but by
+degrees, as he recognised that his secret was safe in my keeping, we
+grew to understand one another better, although it would be too much to
+say that we ever became intimate.</p>
+
+<p>After he went to Sandhurst I lost sight of him, and only a few months
+since the news of his death in the Soudan, where he fell gallantly, made
+me sorrowfully aware that we should never meet again.</p>
+
+<p>I had a lingering fancy that Marjory might appear to me once more, but I
+have long since given up all hope of that in this life, and for what may
+come after I am content to wait.</p>
+
+<p>But the charge my child-friend had undertaken was completed on the night
+she was allowed to return to earth and determine the crisis of two
+lives; there is nothing now to call the bright and gracious little
+spirit back, for her influence will remain always.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center"><i>Spottiswoode &amp; Co. Printers, New-street Square, London</i>.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h2>WORKS BY F. ANSTEY.</h2>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>SECOND EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6<i>s.</i></h3>
+
+<h2>THE TALKING HORSE;</h2>
+
+<h3>AND OTHER TALES.</h3>
+
+<p><b>From THE DAILY CHRONICLE.</b>&mdash;'Full of quaintnesses, fun about dogs and
+boys, and with now and then a graver touch.... Stories which no one but
+the author of "Vice Vers&acirc;" could have produced.'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>FOURTH EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6<i>s.</i></h3>
+
+<h2>THE GIANT'S ROBE.</h2>
+
+<p><b>From THE PALL MALL GAZETTE.</b>&mdash;'The main interest of the book, which is
+very strong indeed, begins when Vincent returns, when Harold Caffyn
+discovers the secret, when every page threatens to bring down doom on
+the head of the miserable Mark. Will he confess? Will he drown himself?
+Will Vincent denounce him? Will Caffyn inform on him? Will his wife
+abandon him?&mdash;we ask eagerly as we read, and cannot cease reading till
+the puzzle is solved in a series of exciting situations.'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>POPULAR EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6<i>s.</i></h3>
+
+<h3>CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i></h3>
+
+<h2>THE PARIAH.</h2>
+
+<p><b>From THE SATURDAY REVIEW.</b>&mdash;'In "The Pariah" we are more than ever struck
+by the sharp intuitive perception and the satirical balancing of
+judgment which makes the author's writings such extremely entertaining
+reading. There is not a dull page&mdash;we might say, not a dull sentence&mdash;in
+it.... The girls are delightfully drawn, especially the bewitching
+Margot and the childish Lettice. Nothing that polish and finish,
+cleverness, humour, wit, and sarcasm can give is left out.'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i></h3>
+
+<h2>VICE VERS&Acirc;;</h2>
+
+<h3>OR, A LESSON TO FATHERS.</h3>
+
+<p><b>From THE SATURDAY REVIEW.</b>&mdash;'If ever there was a book made up from
+beginning to end of laughter, and yet not a comic book, or a "merry"
+book, or a book of jokes, or a book of pictures, or a jest book, or a
+tomfool book, but a perfectly sober and serious book, in the reading of
+which a sober man may laugh without shame from beginning to end, it is
+the new book called "Vice Vers&acirc;; or, a Lesson to Fathers."... We close
+the book, recommending it very earnestly to all fathers in the first
+instance, and their sons, nephews, uncles, and male cousins next.'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i></h3>
+
+<h2>A FALLEN IDOL.</h2>
+
+<p><b>From THE TIMES.</b>&mdash;'Mr. Anstey's new story will delight the multitudinous
+public that laughed over "Vice Vers&acirc;."... The boy who brings the
+accursed image to Champion's house, Mr. Bales, the artist's factotum,
+and above all Mr. Yarker, the ex-butler who has turned policeman, are
+figures whom it is as pleasant to meet as it is impossible to forget.'</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h2>NOVELS BY THE AUTHOR OF 'MEHALAH.'</h2>
+
+<p class="center"><i>Fcp. 8vo. Pictorial boards, 2s. each; or limp red cloth, 2s. 6d. each.</i></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h2>MEHALAH:</h2>
+
+<h3>A STORY OF THE SALT MARSHES.</h3>
+
+<p>'The book is one of the most powerful that has, so far as we know,
+appeared for many years. It will remind many readers of Emily Bront&euml;'s
+wonderful story, "Wuthering Heights," and indeed in some respects it is
+even more powerful.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Scotsman.</span></p>
+
+<p>'"Mehalah" is far above the ordinary level of novels. The writer
+possesses strength, and strength is one of the rarest qualities in
+modern fiction.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Daily News.</span></p>
+
+<p>'A bit of real romance: original, violent, powerful, novel both in place
+and circumstance, and peculiarly impressive.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Truth.</span></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h2>JOHN HERRING:</h2>
+
+<h3>A WEST OF ENGLAND ROMANCE.</h3>
+
+<p>'Among most novels of the day "John Herring" is a very considerable work
+indeed, and both deserves and will receive proportionate
+attention.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Pall Mall Gazette.</span></p>
+
+<p>'Far, very far, above the level of ordinary novels.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Academy.</span></p>
+
+<p>'A powerful and interesting novel. The English is admirable; there is
+great freshness and vigour in the descriptions of scenery and character,
+and in the narrative there is abundance of invention, and many of the
+situations are extremely dramatic.... A book of unusual originality and
+power.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Times.</span></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h2>COURT ROYAL.</h2>
+
+<p>'"Court Royal" is among the few novels of our time that deserve, and
+will probably obtain, life beyond its day. Intellect, knowledge, fancy,
+and humour have gone to its making, and thought besides.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Graphic.</span></p>
+
+<p>'The story holds the reader under a spell which is unbroken from first
+to last.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Morning Post.</span></p>
+
+<p>'It is difficult to say which is the most striking feature of this
+remarkable and welcome novel&mdash;the quaint humour, the consummate power,
+or the freshness.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Vanity Fair.</span></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h2>THE GAVEROCKS.</h2>
+
+<p>'Marked by the vigour of style the freshness of invention, and the
+dramatic power which have gained this talented writer his
+reputation.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Scotsman.</span></p>
+
+<p>'A tale of vivid and well-sustained interest.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Guardian.</span></p>
+
+<p>'The story is one of deep human interest, while the intensity of its
+local colouring enhances its intrinsic merit.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Morning Post.</span></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h2>RICHARD CABLE,</h2>
+
+<h3>THE LIGHTSHIPMAN.</h3>
+
+<p>'A novel essentially readable, and full of life and colour.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Daily
+Telegraph.</span></p>
+
+<p>'The story has a strong interest, which is likely to prove enduring. It
+is as good as anything this powerful writer has produced.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Scotsman.</span></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h2>The 'MOLLY BAWN' SERIES of POPULAR NOVELS</h2>
+
+<h3>Works by the Author of 'MOLLY BAWN,' 'GREEN PLEASURE AND GREY GRIEF,' &amp;c. &amp;c.</h3>
+
+<p class="center"><i>In Pictorial Covers, fcp. 8vo. 2s.; or, in limp red cloth, fcp. 8vo.
+2s. 6d. each.</i></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>PHYLLIS: <span class="smcap">a Novel</span>.</h3>
+
+<p>'A clever and interesting novel.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Spectator.</span> 'Very pleasant
+writing.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Queen.</span></p>
+
+<h3>MOLLY BAWN.</h3>
+
+<p>'Really an attractive novel, idealising human life without departing
+from the truth, and depicting the love of a tender, feminine, yet
+high-spirited girl in a most touching manner. Full of wit, spirit, and
+gaiety. All women will envy and all men will fall in love with her.
+Higher praise we surely cannot give.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Athen&aelig;um.</span></p>
+
+<h3>'AIRY FAIRY LILIAN.'</h3>
+
+<p>'A delightful story, cast in the same mould as its predecessors. The
+characters are cleverly drawn, the dialogue is terse and
+pointed.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Court Journal.</span></p>
+
+<h3>MRS. GEOFFREY.</h3>
+
+<p>'A prettier or more readable story than "Mrs. Geoffrey" nobody need wish
+to meet with.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Scotsman.</span></p>
+
+<h3>ROSSMOYNE.</h3>
+
+<p>'Monica Beresford is a very pretty example of Irish <i>na&iuml;vet&eacute;</i>
+dissociated from shilleaghs; and there is true humour in the conception
+of Kit, her sister.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Academy.</span></p>
+
+<h3>DORIS.</h3>
+
+<p>'"Doris" is a clever story of a marriage of convenience.... The dialogue
+is good: that of "Dicky Browne," a kind of licensed jester, being really
+bright and lively. The heroine is well drawn, and so is a terrible aunt
+of hers, whose encounters with the Marquis (himself a clever portrait)
+are diverting.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Academy.</span></p>
+
+<h3>GREEN PLEASURE AND GREY GRIEF.</h3>
+
+<p>'"Green Pleasure and Grey Grief" is what many of its readers will be
+inclined to call a sweetly pretty story.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Athen&aelig;um.</span></p>
+
+<h3>PORTIA.</h3>
+
+<p>'"Portia, or by Passions Rocked," is of the category of novels to which
+may fairly be applied the epithet of "charming."'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Morning Post.</span></p>
+
+<h3>BEAUTY'S DAUGHTERS.</h3>
+
+<p>'Another triumph.... Of the success of the story there can hardly be any
+doubt.' <span class="smcap">Court Journal.</span></p>
+
+<h3>FAITH AND UNFAITH.</h3>
+
+<p>'A singularly bright, vivacious, readable story.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Illustrated London
+News.</span></p>
+
+<p>'Distinctly superior to three-fourths of the fiction
+published.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Academy.</span></p>
+
+<h3>LADY BRANKSMERE.</h3>
+
+<p>'.... Sufficiently sensational to suit the most ardent admirers of
+fiction, and yet contains much that is worthy of admiration.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Court
+Journal.</span></p>
+
+<h3>LO&#376;S, LORD BERRESFORD, and other Tales.</h3>
+
+<p>'A collection of stories which cannot fail to be popular. There is
+something good in all of them, and one or two are especially racy and
+piquant.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Academy.</span></p>
+
+<h3>UNDER-CURRENTS.</h3>
+
+<p>'Altogether as enjoyable as one is accustomed to expect from the clever
+author of "Molly Bawn."'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Scotsman.</span></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h2>NOVELS BY GEORGE GISSING.</h2>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center"><i>Fcp. 8vo. Pictorial boards, 2s. each; or limp red cloth, 2s. 6d. each.</i></p>
+
+<h2>DEMOS:</h2>
+
+<h3>A STORY OF SOCIALIST LIFE IN ENGLAND.</h3>
+
+<p>'If a tale of Socialism does not find abundance of readers, it is not
+because the times are not ripe for it. This remarkable novel presents
+the great social problem in a striking garb.... "Demos" does not aspire
+to vie with "Alton Locke," but it tells a story more practical, and of
+more brightness and variety.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Times.</span></p>
+
+<p>'A really able and vigorous romance.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Athen&aelig;um.</span></p>
+
+<p>'This is a novel of very considerable ability.... It is evidently
+written by a man who has a very intimate knowledge of the working
+classes, and not a little sympathy with them.... Nothing can be more
+skilful than the sketch of the artisan family round whose fortunes the
+story of the book revolves. The chief character is very powerfully
+drawn.... His mother too, with her narrow, complaining, and almost dumb
+integrity, ... the weak, pretty daughter, and the worthless, blackguard
+son, are hardly less truthful studies.... The sketch of the one or two
+Socialist meetings which the author has occasion to describe, of the
+style of Socialist literature, and the conversation of Socialist
+agitators, shows an intimate knowledge of that field of
+action.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Spectator.</span></p>
+
+<h2>A LIFE'S MORNING.</h2>
+
+<p>'Powerful and unique, as all Mr. Gissing's former writings are. "A
+Life's Morning" is his <i>chef-d'&oelig;uvre</i>.... The story is most
+fascinating and most natural.' <span class="smcap">Whitehall Review.</span></p>
+
+<p>'As a study of feminine nature, "A Life's Morning" is, perhaps, the most
+successful of all Mr. Gissing's works, and deserves to be fully as
+popular as its predecessors.' <span class="smcap">Pall Mall Gazette.</span></p>
+
+<p>'A story which is marked by imaginative insight, subtle delineation of
+character, epigrammatic force of style, and gleams of genuine
+humour.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Standard.</span></p>
+
+<h2>THE NETHER WORLD.</h2>
+
+<p>'Terrible in its earnestness, in its "untouched" photography of the
+desperate struggles and bitter misery of the London poor; never was
+word-painting more thoroughly and obviously true.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">World.</span></p>
+
+<p>'Mr. Gissing is one of the few persons who can handle pitch without
+being defiled by it. While he runs Zola close as a realist, his thoughts
+and language are as pure as those of Miss Yonge herself.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Standard.</span></p>
+
+<p>'A powerful and most interesting novel.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Manchester Guardian.</span></p>
+
+<p class="center"><i>Crown 8vo. 6s.</i></p>
+
+<h2>THYRZA.</h2>
+
+<p>'A very good story indeed.... In power and pathetic treatment the novel
+is above the average.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Athen&aelig;um.</span></p>
+
+<p>'Thyrza is a really exquisite figure; as pathetic a creation as can well
+be imagined.... In short, "Thyrza" is a book of unusual literary
+merit.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Morning Post.</span></p>
+
+<p class="center"><i>Crown 8vo. 6s.</i></p>
+
+<h2>NEW GRUB STREET.</h2>
+
+<p>'Mr. Gissing's writing is bright and strong, his humour is delightful,
+and his satire is easy and yet restrained.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Speaker.</span></p>
+
+<p>'Mr. Gissing has produced a very powerful book.... Full of clever
+touches on literary and social matters.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Saturday Review.</span></p>
+
+<p>'The book is decidedly forcible, and, to a great extent, the result of
+experience.' <span class="smcap">Athen&aelig;um.</span></p>
+
+<p>'Mr. Gissing's new book is the best bit of work he has done since
+"Thyrza." In none of his recent novels has there been such reality of
+feeling, such pathos, such careful yet broad analysis of character. Mr.
+Gissing's characters are real living men and women; they are drawn with
+great skill, sympathy, and truth.'&mdash;<span class="smcap">Guardian.</span></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h3>ILLUSTRATED EDITIONS</h3>
+
+<h4>OF</h4>
+
+<h2>POPULAR WORKS.</h2>
+
+<h4>Handsomely bound in cloth gilt, each volume containing<br />Four Illustrations. Crown 8vo. 3s. 6d. each.</h4>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p><b>THE SMALL HOUSE AT ALLINGTON.</b> By <span class="smcap">Anthony Trollope</span></p>
+
+<p><b>FRAMLEY PARSONAGE.</b> By <span class="smcap">Anthony Trollope</span></p>
+
+<p><b>THE CLAVERINGS.</b> By <span class="smcap">Anthony Trollope</span></p>
+
+<p><b>TRANSFORMATION:</b> a Romance. By <span class="smcap">Nathaniel Hawthorne</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>DOMESTIC STORIES.</b> By the Author of 'John Halifax, Gentleman.'</p>
+
+<p><b>THE MOORS AND THE FENS.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">J. H. Riddell</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>WITHIN THE PRECINCTS.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Oliphant</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>CARIT&Agrave;.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Oliphant</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>FOR PERCIVAL.</b> By <span class="smcap">Margaret Veley</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>NO NEW THING.</b> By W. E. <span class="smcap">Norris</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>LOVE THE DEBT.</b> By <span class="smcap">Richard Ashe King</span> ('Basil').</p>
+
+<p><b>WIVES AND DAUGHTERS.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Gaskell</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>NORTH AND SOUTH.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Gaskell</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>SYLVIA'S LOVERS.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Gaskell</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>CRANFORD, and other Stories.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Gaskell</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>MARY BARTON, and other Stories.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Gaskell</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>RUTH; THE GREY WOMAN, and other Stories.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Gaskell</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>LIZZIE LEIGH; A DARK NIGHT'S WORK, and other Stories.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Gaskell</span>.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h3>ILLUSTRATED EDITION</h3>
+
+<h4>OF THE</h4>
+
+<h3>LIFE AND WORKS</h3>
+
+<h4>OF</h4>
+
+<h2>CHARLOTTE BRONT&Euml;</h2>
+
+<h4>(CURRER BELL),</h4>
+
+<h4>AND HER SISTERS</h4>
+
+<h3>EMILY AND ANNE BRONT&Euml;</h3>
+
+<h4>(ELLIS AND ACTON BELL).</h4>
+
+<p class="center">In Seven Volumes, Large Crown 8vo. handsomely bound in cloth.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><i>Price 5s. per Volume.</i></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>The descriptions in 'Jane Eyre' and the other Fictions by Charlotte
+Bront&euml; and her Sisters being mostly of actual places, the Publishers
+considered that Views were the most suitable Illustrations for the
+Novels. They were indebted for a clue to the real names of the most
+interesting scenes to a friend of the Bront&euml; family, who enabled the
+artist, Mr. G. M. Wimperis, to identify the places described. He made
+faithful sketches of them on the spot, and drew them on wood.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p>1.&mdash;<b>JANE EYRE.</b> By Charlotte Bront&euml;. With Five Illustrations.<br />
+LOWOOD.<br />GATESHEAD HALL.<br />THORNFIELD HALL.<br />MOOR HOUSE.<br />FERNDEAN MANOR.</p>
+
+<p>2.&mdash;<b>SHIRLEY.</b> By Charlotte Bront&euml;. With Five Illustrations.<br />
+YORKE'S HOUSE.<br />NUNNELY COMMON AND WOOD.<br />FIELDHEAD HALL.<br />HOLLOW'S MILL.<br />BRIARFIELD CHURCH.</p>
+
+<p>3.&mdash;<b>VILLETTE.</b> By Charlotte Bront&euml;. With Five Illustrations.<br />
+THE PARK, BRUSSELS.<br />DOME OF ST. PAUL'S.<br />PENSIONNAT DES DEMOISELLES, BRUSSELS.<br />
+GARDEN IN THE RUE FOSSETTE.<br />GRANDE PLACE, BRUSSELS.</p>
+
+<p>4.&mdash;<b>THE PROFESSOR, and POEMS.</b> By Charlotte Bront&euml;. With Poems by
+her Sisters and Father. With Five Illustrations.<br />
+VIEW FROM CRIMSWORTH HALL.<br />HOUSE IN DAISY LANE.<br />
+RUE ROYALE, BRUSSELS.<br />PROTESTANT CEMETERY.<br />VIEW OF THE MOORS.</p>
+
+<p>5.&mdash;<b>WUTHERING HEIGHTS.</b> By Emily Bront&euml;. <b>AGNES GREY.</b> By Anne
+Bront&euml;. With a Preface and Biographical Notice of both Authors, by Charlotte Bront&euml;. With Five Illustrations.<br />
+HAWORTH CHURCH AND PARSONAGE.<br />VALLEY OF GIMMERTON.<br />
+WUTHERING HEIGHTS.<br />THE MOORS.<br />HORTON LODGE.</p>
+
+<p>6.&mdash;<b>THE TENANT OF WILDFELL HALL.</b> By Anne Bront&euml;. With Five Illustrations.<br />
+WILDFELL HALL.<br />GRASSDALE MANOR.<br />
+HARRINGBY HALL.<br />ON THE MOORS.<br />WILDFELL HALL (<i>second view</i>).</p>
+
+<p>7.&mdash;<b>LIFE OF CHARLOTTE BRONT&Euml;.</b> By Mrs. Gaskell. With Seven Illustrations.<br />
+PORTRAIT OF CHARLOTTE BRONT&Euml;.<br />
+PORTRAIT OF THE REV. PATRICK BRONT&Euml;.<br />
+CASTERTON SCHOOL.<br />ROE HEAD.<br />
+HAWORTH PARSONAGE.<br />THE BRONT&Euml; WATERFALL.<br />
+FACSIMILE OF A SKETCH BY PATRICK BRANWELL BRONT&Euml;.</p>
+
+<p><sup>*</sup>*<sup>*</sup> The Volumes are also to be had in small post 8vo. limp cloth, price
+2s. 6d. each; or in small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with Frontispiece to each volume, cut or uncut edges, price 1s. 6d. each.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h3>POPULAR NOVELS.</h3>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h4><i>Each Work complete in One Volume, Crown 8vo. price Six Shillings.</i></h4>
+
+<p><b>NEW GRUB STREET.</b> By <span class="smcap">George Gissing</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>EIGHT DAYS.</b> By R. E. <span class="smcap">Forrest</span>, Author of 'The Touchstone of Peril.'</p>
+
+<p><b>A DRAUGHT OF LETHE.</b> By <span class="smcap">Roy Tellet</span>, Author of 'The Outcasts' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>THE RAJAH'S HEIR.</b> By a New Author.</p>
+
+<p><b>THE PARIAH.</b> By F. <span class="smcap">Anstey</span>, Author of 'Vice Vers&acirc;' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>THYRZA.</b> By <span class="smcap">George Gissing</span>, Author of 'Demos' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>THE NETHER WORLD.</b> By <span class="smcap">George Gissing</span>, Author of 'Demos' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>ROBERT ELSMERE.</b> By Mrs. <span class="smcap">Humphry Ward</span>, Author of 'Miss Bretherton' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>RICHARD CABLE</b>: the Lightshipman. By the Author of 'Mehalah,' 'John Herring,' 'Court Royal,' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>THE GAVEROCKS.</b> By the Author of 'Mehalah,' 'John Herring,' 'Court Royal,' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>DEMOS</b>: a Story of Socialist Life in England. By <span class="smcap">George Gissing</span>,<br />
+Author of 'Thyrza' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>A FALLEN IDOL.</b> By F. <span class="smcap">Anstey</span>, Author of 'Vice Vers&acirc;' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>THE GIANT'S ROBE.</b> By F. <span class="smcap">Anstey</span>, Author of 'Vice Vers&acirc;' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>OLD KENSINGTON.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>THE VILLAGE ON THE CLIFF.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>FIVE OLD FRIENDS AND A YOUNG PRINCE.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>TO ESTHER, and other Sketches.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>BLUEBEARD'S KEYS, and other Stories.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>THE STORY OF ELIZABETH; TWO HOURS; FROM AN ISLAND.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>TOILERS AND SPINSTERS.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>MISS ANGEL; FULHAM LAWN.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>MISS WILLIAMSON'S DIVAGATIONS.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>MRS. DYMOND.</b> By Miss <span class="smcap">Thackeray</span>.</p>
+
+<p><b>LLANALY REEFS.</b> By Lady <span class="smcap">Verney</span>, Author of 'Stone Edge' &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p><b>LETTICE LISLE.</b> By Lady <span class="smcap">Verney</span>. With 3 Illustrations.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>POCKET EDITIONS.</h4>
+
+<h3>W. M. THACKERAY'S WORKS.</h3>
+
+<p class="center">In Twenty-seven Volumes. Price 1<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i> each in half-cloth,
+cut or uncut edges; or 1<i>s.</i> in paper cover.</p>
+
+<p class="center">'A perfect and marvellously cheap edition.' Spectator.</p>
+
+<p class="center">'Neat, handy, and pretty little books.' <span class="smcap">Saturday Review.</span></p>
+
+<p class="center"><sup>*</sup>*<sup>*</sup> <i>The set of Twenty-seven Volumes can also be had in a handsome ebonised case.<br />
+Height is 17 inches, width 12 inches, depth 4-3/4 inches. Price &pound;2. 12s. 6d.</i></p>
+
+<h4>TITLES OF THE VOLUMES.</h4>
+
+<p><b>VANITY FAIR.</b> 2 vols.</p>
+
+<p><b>The HISTORY of PENDENNIS.</b> 2 vols.</p>
+
+<p><b>The MEMOIRS of BARRY LYNDON:</b> A Little Dinner at Timmins's.</p>
+
+<p><b>The NEWCOMES.</b> 2 vols.</p>
+
+<p><b>The HISTORY of HENRY ESMOND.</b></p>
+
+<p><b>The VIRGINIANS.</b> 2 vols.</p>
+
+<p><b>The ADVENTURES of PHILIP,</b> to which is prefixed A SHABBY GENTEEL STORY. 2 vols.</p>
+
+<p><b>The IRISH SKETCH-BOOK.</b></p>
+
+<p><b>The GREAT HOGGARTY DIAMOND.</b> The HISTORY of the NEXT FRENCH REVOLUTION. CRUIKSHANK
+and LEECH. COX'S DIARY. The BEDFORD ROW CONSPIRACY.</p>
+
+<p><b>MAJOR GAHAGAN.</b> The FATAL BOOTS. MEN'S WIVES. The SECOND FUNERAL of NAPOLEON.</p>
+
+<p><b>The YELLOWPLUSH PAPERS.</b> CATHERINE.</p>
+
+<p><b>The FITZBOODLE PAPERS.</b> CHARACTER SKETCHES. TALES. PAPERS by the FAT CONTRIBUTOR.
+Miss TICKLETOBY'S LECTURES on ENGLISH HISTORY.</p>
+
+<p><b>The BOOK of SNOBS.</b> NOVELS by EMINENT HANDS. SULTAN STORK, and other Papers.</p>
+
+<p><b>LOVEL the WIDOWER.</b> The WOLVES and the LAMB. NOTES of a JOURNEY from CORNHILL to GRAND CAIRO.</p>
+
+<p><b>BALLADS.</b> A LEGEND of the RHINE. The DIARY of C. JEAMES DE LA PLUCHE, Esq., with his Letters.</p>
+
+<p><b>ROUNDABOUT PAPERS.</b> LITTLE TRAVELS and ROADSIDE-SKETCHES.</p>
+
+<p><b>The CHRISTMAS BOOKS of Mr. M. A. TITMARSH.</b> 2 vols. CONTENTS:&mdash;Mrs. Perkins' Ball&mdash;Our
+Street&mdash;Dr. Birch and his Young Friends&mdash;Rebecca and Rowena&mdash;The
+Rose and the Ring&mdash;The Kickleburys on the Rhine.</p>
+
+<p><b>SKETCHES and TRAVELS in LONDON;</b> and MISCELLANEOUS CONTRIBUTIONS to 'PUNCH.'</p>
+
+<p><b>The FOUR GEORGES;</b> and The ENGLISH HUMORISTS of the EIGHTEENTH CENTURY.</p>
+
+<p><b>The PARIS SKETCH-BOOK;</b> and A LECTURE on CHARITY and HUMOUR.</p>
+
+<p><b>DENIS DUVAL;</b> and MISCELLANEOUS ESSAYS, SKETCHES, and REVIEWS.</p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">Small fcp. 8vo. half-cloth, cut or uncut edges, One Shilling.</p>
+
+<h3>POEMS BY ELIZABETH BARRETT BROWNING.</h3>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">Small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut edges, price One Shilling.</p>
+
+<h3>POCKET VOLUME OF SELECTIONS FROM<br />THE POETICAL WORKS OF ROBERT BROWNING.</h3>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>LIFE AND WORKS OF CHARLOTTE BRONT&Euml;</h3>
+
+<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Currer Bell</span>) and her Sisters EMILY and ANNE BRONT&Euml; (<span class="smcap">Ellis</span> and
+<span class="smcap">Acton Bell</span>). Seven small Fcp. 8vo. Volumes, each containing a Frontispiece,
+bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut edges, price 1<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i> per volume.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap">Titles of the Volumes</span>:&mdash;<b>JANE EYRE.</b>&mdash;<b>SHIRLEY.</b>&mdash;<b>VILLETTE.</b>&mdash;<b>The
+PROFESSOR and POEMS.</b>&mdash;<b>WUTHERING HEIGHTS and AGNES GREY.</b>&mdash;<b>TENANT of WILDFELL HALL.</b>&mdash;<b>LIFE of CHARLOTTE BRONT&Euml;.</b></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<h3>MRS. GASKELL'S WORKS.</h3>
+
+<p class="center">Eight Volumes, small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut edges, price 1<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i> per volume.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap">Titles of the Volumes</span>:&mdash;<b>WIVES and DAUGHTERS.</b>&mdash;<b>NORTH and SOUTH.</b>&mdash;<b>SYLVIA'S
+LOVERS.</b>&mdash;<b>CRANFORD, and other Tales.</b>&mdash;<b>MARY BARTON, and
+other Tales.</b>&mdash;<b>RUTH, and other Tales.</b>&mdash;<b>A DARK NIGHT'S WORK, and other Tales.</b>&mdash;<b>MY LADY LUDLOW, and other Tales.</b></p>
+
+<hr class="smler" />
+
+<p class="center">London: SMITH, ELDER, &amp; CO., 15 Waterloo Place.</p>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Talking Horse, by F. Anstey
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+</body>
+</html>
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@@ -0,0 +1,9971 @@
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Talking Horse, by F. Anstey
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Talking Horse
+       And Other Tales
+
+Author: F. Anstey
+
+Release Date: November 16, 2008 [EBook #27284]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TALKING HORSE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Clarke, Martin Pettit and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This
+file was produced from images generously made available
+by The Internet Archive/Canadian Libraries)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+THE TALKING HORSE
+
+ETC.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+THE TALKING HORSE
+
+AND OTHER TALES
+
+
+BY
+
+F. ANSTEY
+
+AUTHOR OF 'VICE VERSA' 'THE GIANT'S ROBE' 'THE PARIAH' ETC.
+
+SECOND EDITION
+
+LONDON
+SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 WATERLOO PLACE
+1892
+
+[_All rights reserved_]
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE
+
+
+These stories originally appeared in 'Macmillan's,' 'Longman's,'
+'Atalanta,' 'The Cornhill,' 'The Graphic,' 'Aunt Judy's,' 'The
+Reflector,' and Unwin's 'Christmas Annual,' respectively.
+
+                                                         F. A.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+                                 PAGE
+THE TALKING HORSE                   1
+
+THE GOOD LITTLE GIRL               39
+
+A MATTER OF TASTE                  72
+
+DON; THE STORY OF A GREEDY DOG    127
+
+TAKEN BY SURPRISE                 151
+
+PALEFACE AND REDSKIN              176
+
+SHUT OUT                          234
+
+TOMMY'S HERO                      250
+
+A CANINE ISHMAEL                  274
+
+MARJORY                           286
+
+
+
+
+_THE TALKING HORSE_
+
+
+It was on the way to Sandown Park that I met him first, on that horribly
+wet July afternoon when Bendigo won the Eclipse Stakes. He sat opposite
+to me in the train going down, and my attention was first attracted to
+him by the marked contrast between his appearance and his attire: he had
+not thought fit to adopt the regulation costume for such occasions, and
+I think I never saw a man who had made himself more aggressively horsey.
+The mark of the beast was sprinkled over his linen: he wore snaffle
+sleeve-links, a hard hunting-hat, a Newmarket coat, and extremely tight
+trousers. And with all this, he fell as far short of the genuine
+sportsman as any stage super who ever wore his spurs upside down in a
+hunting-chorus. His expression was mild and inoffensive, and his watery
+pale eyes and receding chin gave one the idea that he was hardly to be
+trusted astride anything more spirited than a gold-headed cane. And yet,
+somehow, he aroused compassion rather than any sense of the ludicrous:
+he had that look of shrinking self-effacement which comes of a recent
+humiliation, and, in spite of all extravagances, he was obviously a
+gentleman; while something in his manner indicated that his natural
+tendency would, once at all events, have been to avoid any kind of
+extremes.
+
+He puzzled and interested me so much that I did my best to enter into
+conversation with him, only to be baffled by the jerky embarrassment
+with which he met all advances, and when we got out at Esher, curiosity
+led me to keep him still in view.
+
+Evidently he had not come with any intention of making money. He avoided
+the grand stand, with the bookmakers huddling in couples, like hoarse
+lovebirds; he kept away from the members' inclosure, where the Guards'
+band was endeavouring to defy the elements which emptied their vials
+into the brazen instruments; he drifted listlessly about the course till
+the clearing-bell rang, and it seemed as if he was searching for some
+one whom he only wished to discover in order to avoid.
+
+Sandown, it must be admitted, was not as gay as usual that day, with its
+'deluged park' and 'unsummer'd sky,' its waterproofed toilettes and
+massed umbrellas, whose sides gleamed livid as they caught the
+light--but there was a general determination to ignore the unseasonable
+dampness as far as possible, and an excitement over the main event of
+the day which no downpour could quench.
+
+The Ten Thousand was run: ladies with marvellously confected bonnets
+lowered their umbrellas without a murmur, and smart men on drags shook
+hands effusively as, amidst a frantic roar of delight, Bendigo strode
+past the post. The moment after, I looked round for my incongruous
+stranger, and saw him engaged in a well-meant attempt to press a currant
+bun upon a carriage-horse tethered to one of the trees--a feat of
+abstraction which, at such a time, was only surpassed by that of
+Archimedes at the sack of Syracuse.
+
+After that I could no longer control my curiosity--I felt I must speak
+to him again, and I made an opportunity later, as we stood alone on a
+stand which commanded the finish of one of the shorter courses, by
+suggesting that he should share my umbrella.
+
+Before accepting he glanced suspiciously at me through the rills that
+streamed from his unprotected hat-brim. 'I'm afraid,' I said, 'it is
+rather like shutting the stable-door after the steed is stolen.'
+
+He started. 'He _was_ stolen, then,' he cried; 'so you have heard?'
+
+I explained that I had only used an old proverb which I thought might
+appeal to him, and he sighed heavily.
+
+'I was misled for the moment,' he said: 'you have guessed, then, that I
+have been accustomed to horses?'
+
+'You have hardly made any great secret of it.'
+
+'The fact is,' he said, instantly understanding this allusion to his
+costume, 'I--I put on these things so as not to lose the habit of
+riding altogether--I have not been on horseback lately. At one time I
+used to ride constantly--constantly. I was a regular attendant in Rotten
+Row--until something occurred which shook my nerve, and I am only
+waiting now for the shock to subside.'
+
+I did not like to ask any questions, and we walked back to the station,
+and travelled up to Waterloo in company, without any further reference
+to the subject.
+
+As we were parting, however, he said, 'I wonder if you would care to
+hear my full story some day? I cannot help thinking it would interest
+you, and it would be a relief to me.'
+
+I was ready enough to hear whatever he chose to tell me; and persuaded
+him to dine with me at my rooms that evening, and unbosom himself
+afterwards, which he did to an extent for which I confess I was
+unprepared.
+
+That he himself implicitly believed in his own story, I could not doubt;
+and he told it throughout with the oddest mixture of vanity and modesty,
+and an obvious struggle between a dim perception of his own absurdity
+and the determination to spare himself in no single particular, which,
+though it did not overcome my scepticism, could not fail to enlist
+sympathy. But for all that, by the time he entered upon the more
+sensational part of his case, I was driven to form conclusions
+respecting it which, as they will probably force themselves upon the
+reader's own mind, I need not anticipate here.
+
+I give the story, as far as possible, in the words of its author; and
+have only to add that it would never have been published here without
+his full consent and approval.
+
+
+'My name,' said he, 'is Gustavus Pulvertoft. I have no occupation, and
+six hundred a year. I lived a quiet and contented bachelor until I was
+twenty-eight, and then I met Diana Chetwynd for the first time. We were
+spending Christmas at the same country-house, and it did not take me
+long to become the most devoted of her many adorers. She was one of the
+most variously accomplished girls I had ever met. She was a skilled
+musician, a brilliant amateur actress; she could give most men thirty
+out of a hundred at billiards, and her judgment and daring across the
+most difficult country had won her the warm admiration of all
+hunting-men. And she was neither fast nor horsey, seeming to find but
+little pleasure in the society of mere sportsmen, to whose conversation
+she infinitely preferred that of persons who, like myself, were rather
+agreeable than athletic. I was not at that time, whatever I may be now,
+without my share of good looks, and for some reason it pleased Miss
+Chetwynd to show me a degree of favour which she accorded to no other
+member of the house-party.
+
+It was annoying to feel that my unfamiliarity with the open-air sports
+in which she delighted debarred me from her company to so great an
+extent; for it often happened that I scarcely saw her until the evening,
+when I sometimes had the bliss of sitting next to her at dinner; but on
+these occasions I could not help seeing that she found some pleasure in
+my society.
+
+I don't think I have mentioned that, besides being exquisitely lovely,
+Diana was an heiress, and it was not without a sense of my own
+presumption that I allowed myself to entertain the hope of winning her
+at some future day. Still, I was not absolutely penniless, and she was
+her own mistress, and I had some cause, as I have said, for believing
+that she was, at least, not ill-disposed towards me. It seemed a
+favourable sign, for instance, when she asked me one day why it was I
+never rode. I replied that I had not ridden for years--though I did not
+add that the exact number of those years was twenty-eight.
+
+'Oh, but you must take it up again!' she said, with the prettiest air of
+imperiousness. 'You ought to ride in the Row next season.'
+
+'If I did,' I said, 'would you let me ride with you sometimes?'
+
+'We should meet, of course,' she said; 'and it is such a pity not to
+keep up your riding--you lose so much by not doing so.'
+
+Was I wrong in taking this as an intimation that, by following her
+advice, I should not lose my reward? If you had seen her face as she
+spoke, you would have thought as I did then--as I do now.
+
+And so, with this incentive, I overcame any private misgivings, and soon
+after my return to town attended a fashionable riding-school near Hyde
+Park, with the fixed determination to acquire the whole art and mystery
+of horsemanship.
+
+That I found learning a pleasure I cannot conscientiously declare. I
+have passed happier hours than those I spent in cantering round four
+bare whitewashed walls on a snorting horse, with my interdicted stirrups
+crossed upon the saddle. The riding-master informed me from time to time
+that I was getting on, and I knew instinctively when I was coming off;
+but I must have made some progress, for my instructor became more
+encouraging. 'Why, when you come here first, Mr. Pulvertoft, sir, you
+were like a pair o' tongs on a wall, as they say; whereas now--well, you
+can tell yourself how you are,' he would say; though, even then, I
+occasionally had reason to regret that I was _not_ on a wall. However, I
+persevered, inspired by the thought that each fresh horse I crossed (and
+some were very fresh indeed) represented one more barrier surmounted
+between myself and Diana, and encouraged by the discovery, after
+repeated experiments, that tan was rather soothing to fall upon than
+otherwise.
+
+When I walked in the Row, where a few horsemen were performing as
+harbingers of spring, I criticised their riding, which I thought
+indifferent, as they neglected nearly all the rules. I began to
+anticipate a day when I should exhibit a purer and more classic style of
+equestrianism. And one morning I saw Diana, who pulled up her dancing
+mare to ask me if I had remembered her advice, and I felt proudly able
+to reply that I should certainly make my appearance in the Row before
+very long.
+
+From that day I was perpetually questioning my riding-master as to when
+he considered I should be ripe enough for Rotten Row. He was dubious,
+but not actually dissuasive. 'It's like this, you see, sir,' he
+explained, 'if you get hold of a quiet, steady horse--why, you won't
+come to no harm; but if you go out on an animal that will take advantage
+of you, Mr. Pulvertoft, why, you'll be all no-how on him, sir.'
+
+They would have mounted me at the school; but I knew most of the stud
+there, and none of them quite came up to my ideal of a 'quiet, steady
+horse;' so I went to a neighbouring job-master, from whom I had
+occasionally hired a brougham, and asked to be shown an animal he could
+recommend to one who had not had much practice lately. He admitted
+candidly enough that most of his horses 'took a deal of riding,' but
+added that it so happened that he had one just then which would suit me
+'down to the ground'--a phrase which grated unpleasantly on my nerves,
+though I consented to see the horse. His aspect impressed me most
+favourably. He was a chestnut of noble proportions, with a hogged mane;
+but what reassured me was the expression of his eye, indicating as it
+did a self-respect and sagacity which one would hardly expect for seven
+and sixpence an hour.
+
+'You won't get a showier Park 'ack than what he is, not to be so quiet,'
+said his owner. 'He's what you may call a kind 'oss, and as gentle--you
+could ride him on a packthread.'
+
+I considered reins safer, but I was powerfully drawn towards the horse:
+he seemed to me to be sensible that he had a character to lose, and to
+possess too high an intelligence wilfully to forfeit his testimonials.
+With hardly a second thought, I engaged him for the following afternoon.
+
+I mounted at the stables, with just a passing qualm, perhaps, while my
+stirrup-leathers were being adjusted, and a little awkwardness in taking
+up my reins, which were more twisted than I could have wished; however,
+at length, I found myself embarked on the stream of traffic on the back
+of the chestnut--whose name, by the way, was Brutus.
+
+Shall I ever forget the pride and ecstasy of finding that I had my steed
+under perfect control, that we threaded the maze of carriages with
+absolute security? I turned him into the Park, and clucked my tongue: he
+broke into a canter, and how shall I describe my delight at the
+discovery that it was not uncomfortable? I said 'Woa,' and he stopped,
+so gradually that my equilibrium was not seriously disturbed; he
+trotted, and still I accommodated myself to his movements without any
+positive inconvenience. I could have embraced him for gratitude: never
+before had I been upon a beast whose paces were so easy, whose behaviour
+was so considerate. I could ride at last! or, which amounted to the same
+thing, I could ride the horse I was on, and I would 'use no other.' I
+was about to meet Diana Chetwynd, and need not fear even to encounter
+her critical eyes.
+
+We had crossed the Serpentine bridge, and were just turning in upon the
+Ride, when--and here I am only too conscious that what I am about to say
+may strike you as almost incredible--when I heard an unfamiliar voice
+addressing me with, 'I say--you!' and the moment afterwards realised
+that it proceeded from my own horse!
+
+I am not ashamed to own that I was as nearly off as possible; for a more
+practised rider than I could pretend to be might have a difficulty in
+preserving his equanimity in this all but unparalleled situation. I was
+too much engaged in feeling for my left stirrup to make any reply, and
+presently the horse spoke once more. 'I say,' he inquired, and I failed
+to discern the slightest trace of respect in his tone--'do you think you
+can ride?' You can judge for yourself how disconcerting the inquiry must
+have been from such lips: I felt rooted to the saddle--a sensation
+which, with me, was sufficiently rare. I looked round in helpless
+bewilderment, at the shimmering Serpentine, and the white houses in Park
+Lane gleaming out of a lilac haze, at the cocoa-coloured Row, and the
+flash of distant carriage-wheels in the sunlight: all looked as
+usual--and yet, there was I on the back of a horse which had just
+inquired 'whether I thought I could ride'!
+
+'I have had two dozen lessons at a riding-school,' I said at last, with
+rather a flabby dignity.
+
+'I should hardly have suspected it,' was his brutal retort. 'You are
+evidently one of the hopeless cases.'
+
+I was deeply hurt, the more so because I could not deny that he had some
+claim to be a judge. 'I--I thought we were getting on so nicely
+together,' I faltered, and all he said in reply to that was, '_Did_
+you?'
+
+'Do you know,' I began, striving to be conversational, 'I never was on a
+horse that talked before.'
+
+'You are enough to make any horse talk,' he answered; 'but I suppose I
+_am_ an exception.'
+
+'I think you must be,' said I. 'The only horses I ever heard of as
+possessing the gift of speech were the Houyhnhnms.'
+
+'How do you know I am not one of them?' he replied.
+
+'If you are, you will understand that I took the liberty of mounting you
+under a very pardonable mistake; and if you will have the goodness to
+stand still, I will no longer detain you.'
+
+'Not so fast,' said he: 'I want to know something more about you first.
+I should say now you were a man with plenty of oats.'
+
+'I am--well off,' I said. How I wished I was!
+
+'I have long been looking out for a proprietor who would not overwork
+me: now, of course, I don't know, but you scarcely strike me as a _hard_
+rider.'
+
+'I do not think I could be fairly accused of that,' I answered, with all
+the consciousness of innocence.
+
+'Just so--then buy me.'
+
+'No,' I gasped: 'after the extremely candid opinion you were good enough
+to express of my riding, I'm surprised that you should even suggest such
+a thing.'
+
+'Oh, I will put up with that--you will suit me well enough, I dare say.'
+
+'You must excuse me. I prefer to keep my spare cash for worthier
+objects; and, with your permission, I will spend the remainder of the
+afternoon on foot.'
+
+'You will do nothing of the sort,' said he.
+
+'If you won't stop, and let me get off properly,' I said with firmness,
+'I shall _roll_ off.' There were some promenaders within easy hail; but
+how was I to word a call for help, how explain such a dilemma as mine?
+
+'You will only reduce me to the painful necessity of rolling on you,' he
+replied. 'You must see that you are to a certain extent in my power.
+Suppose it occurred to me to leap those rails and take you into the
+Serpentine, or to run away and upset a mounted policeman with you--do
+you think you could offer much opposition?'
+
+I could not honestly assert that I did. 'You were introduced to me,' I
+said reproachfully, 'as a _kind_ horse!'
+
+'And so I am--apart from matters of business. Come, will you buy, or be
+bolted with? I hate indecision!'
+
+'Buy!' I said, with commercial promptness. 'If you will take me back, I
+will arrange about it at once.'
+
+It is needless to say that my one idea was to get safely off his back:
+after which, neither honour nor law could require me to execute a
+contract extorted from me by threats. But, as we were going down the
+mews, he said reflectively, 'I've been thinking--it will be better for
+all parties, if you make your offer to my proprietor _before_ you
+dismount.' I was too vexed to speak: this animal's infernal intelligence
+had foreseen my manoeuvre--he meant to foil it, if he could.
+
+And then we clattered in under the glass-roofed yard of the livery
+stables; and the job-master, who was alone there, cast his eyes up at
+the sickly-faced clock, as if he were comparing its pallor with my own.
+'Why, you _are_ home early, sir,' he said. 'You didn't find the 'orse
+too much for you, did you?' He said this without any suspicion of the
+real truth; and, indeed, I may say, once for all, that this weird
+horse--Houyhnhnm, or whatever else he might be--admitted no one but
+myself into the secret of his marvellous gifts, and in all his
+conversations with me, managed (though how, I cannot pretend to say) to
+avoid being overheard.
+
+'Oh, dear no,' I protested, 'he carried me admirably--admirably!' and I
+made an attempt to slip off.
+
+No such thing: Brutus instantly jogged my memory, and me, by the
+slightest suggestion of a 'buck.'
+
+'He's a grand 'orse, sir, isn't he?' said the job-master complacently.
+
+'M--magnificent!' I agreed, with a jerk. 'Will you go to his head,
+please?'
+
+But the horse backed into the centre of the yard, where he plunged with
+a quiet obstinacy. 'I like him so much,' I called out, as I clung to the
+saddle, 'that I want to know if you're at all inclined to part with
+him?' Here Brutus became calm and attentive.
+
+'Would you be inclined to make me a orfer for him, sir?'
+
+'Yes,' I said faintly. 'About how much would he be?'
+
+'You step into my orfice here, sir,' said he, 'and we'll talk it over.'
+
+I should have been only too willing, for there was no room there for the
+horse, but the suspicious animal would not hear of it: he began to
+revolve immediately.
+
+'Let us settle it now--here,' I said, 'I can't wait.'
+
+The job-master stroked away a grin. No doubt there _was_ something
+unbusinesslike and unpractical in such precipitation, especially as
+combined with my appearance at the time.
+
+'Well, you _'ave_ took a voilent fancy to the 'orse and no mistake,
+sir,' he remarked.
+
+'I never crossed a handsomer creature,' I said; which was hardly a
+prudent remark for an intending purchaser, but then, there was the
+animal himself to be conciliated.
+
+'I don't know, really, as I can do without him just at this time of
+year,' said the man. 'I'm under-'orsed as it is for the work I've got to
+do.'
+
+A sweet relief stole over me: I had done all that could be expected of
+me. 'I'm very sorry to hear that,' I said, preparing to dismount. 'That
+_is_ a disappointment; but if you can't there's an end of it.'
+
+'Don't you be afraid,' said Brutus, '_he'll_ sell me readily enough:
+make him an offer, quick!'
+
+'I'll give you thirty guineas for him, come!' I said, knowing well
+enough that he would not take twice the money.
+
+'I thought a gentleman like you would have had more insight into the
+value of a 'orse,' he said: 'why, his action alone is worth that, sir.'
+
+'You couldn't let me have the action without the horse, I suppose?' I
+said, and I must have intended some joke.
+
+It is unnecessary to prolong a painful scene. Brutus ran me up steadily
+from sum to sum, until his owner said at last: 'Well, we won't 'aggle,
+sir, call it a hundred.'
+
+I had to call it a hundred, and what is more, it _was_ a hundred. I took
+him without a warranty, without even a veterinary opinion. I could have
+been induced to take my purchase away then and there, as if I had been
+buying a canary, so unaccustomed was I to transactions of this kind, and
+I am afraid the job-master considered me little better than a fool.
+
+So I found myself the involuntary possessor of a Houyhnhnm, or something
+even worse, and I walked back to my rooms in Park Street in a state of
+stupor. What was I to do with him? To ride an animal so brutally
+plainspoken would be a continual penance; and yet, I should have to keep
+him, for I knew he was cunning enough to outwit any attempt to dispose
+of him. And to this, Love and Ambition had led me! I could not, after
+all I had said, approach Diana with any confidence as a mere pedestrian:
+the fact that I was in possession of a healthy horse which I never rode,
+would be sure to leak out in time, and how was I to account for it? I
+could see no way, and I groaned under an embarrassment which I dared not
+confide to the friendliest ear. I hated the monster that had saddled
+himself upon me, and looked in vain for any mode of escape.
+
+I had to provide Brutus with stabling in another part of the town, for
+he proved exceedingly difficult to please: he found fault with
+everything, and I only wonder he did not demand that his stable should
+be fitted up with blue china and mezzotints. In his new quarters I left
+him for some days to his own devices: a course which I was glad to find,
+on visiting him again, had considerably reduced his arrogance. He wanted
+to go in the Row and see the other horses, and it did not at all meet
+his views to be exercised there by a stableman at unfashionable hours.
+So he proposed a compromise. If I would only consent to mount him, he
+engaged to treat me with forbearance, and pointed out that he could give
+me, as he expressed it, various 'tips' which would improve my seat. I
+was not blind to the advantages of such an arrangement. It is not every
+one who secures a riding-master in the person of his own horse; the
+horse is essentially a generous animal, and I felt that I might trust to
+Brutus's honour. And to do him justice, he observed the compact with
+strict good faith. Some of his 'tips,' it is true, very nearly tipped me
+off, but their result was to bring us closer together; our relations
+were less strained; it seemed to me that I gained more mastery over him
+every day, and was less stiff afterwards.
+
+But I was not allowed to enjoy this illusion long. One day when I
+innocently asked him if he found my hands improving, he turned upon me
+his off sardonic eye. 'You'll _never_ improve, old sack-of-beans' (for
+he had come to address me with a freedom I burned to resent); 'hands!
+why, you're sawing my mouth off all the time. And your feet "home," and
+tickling me under my shoulders at every stride--why, I'm half ashamed to
+be seen about with you.'
+
+I was deeply hurt. 'I will spare you for the future,' I said coldly;
+'this is my last appearance.'
+
+'Nonsense,' he said, 'you needn't show temper over it. Surely, if I can
+put up with it, _you_ can! But we will make a new compact.' (I never
+knew such a beast as he was for bargains!) 'You only worry me by
+interfering with the reins. Let 'em out, and leave everything to me.
+Just mention from time to time where you want to go, and I'll attend to
+it,--if I've nothing better to do.'
+
+I felt that such an understanding was destructive of all dignity,
+subverting, as it did, the natural relations between horse and rider;
+but I had hardly any self-respect left, and I consented, since I saw no
+way of refusing. And on the whole, I cannot say, even now, that I had
+any grave reason for finding fault with the use Brutus made of my
+concessions; he showed more tact than I could have expected in
+disguising the merely nominal nature of my authority.
+
+I had only one serious complaint against him, which was that he had a
+habit of breaking suddenly away, with a merely formal apology, to
+exchange equine civilities with some cob or mare, to whose owner I was a
+perfect stranger, thus driving me to invent the most desperate excuses
+to cover my seeming intrusion: but I managed to account for it in
+various ways, and even made a few acquaintances in this irregular and
+involuntary manner. I could have wished he had been a less susceptible
+animal, for, though his flirtations were merely Platonic, it is rather
+humiliating to have to play 'gooseberry' to one's own horse--a part
+which I was constantly being called upon to perform!
+
+As it happened, Diana was away in Paris that Easter, and we had not met
+since my appearance in the Row; but I knew she would be in town again
+shortly, and with consummate diplomacy I began to excite Brutus's
+curiosity by sundry careless, half-slighting allusions to Miss
+Chetwynd's little mare, Wild Rose. 'She's too frisky for my taste,' I
+said, 'but she's been a good deal admired, though I dare say you
+wouldn't be particularly struck by her.'
+
+So that, on the first afternoon of Diana's return to the Row, I found it
+easy, under cover of giving Brutus an opportunity of forming an opinion,
+to prevail on him to carry me to her side. Diana, who was with a certain
+Lady Verney, her chaperon, welcomed me with a charming smile.
+
+'I had no idea you could ride so well,' she said, 'you manage that
+beautiful horse of yours so very easily--with such light hands, too.'
+
+This was not irony, for I could now give my whole mind to my seat; and,
+as I never interfered at all with the steering apparatus, my hands must
+have seemed the perfection of lightness.
+
+'He wants delicate handling,' I answered carelessly, 'but he goes very
+well with _me_.'
+
+'I wish you would let me try his paces some morning, Pulvertoft,' struck
+in a Colonel Cockshott, who was riding with them, and whom I knew
+slightly: 'I've a notion he would go better on the curb.'
+
+'I shall be very happy,' I began, when, just in time, I noticed a
+warning depression in Brutus's ears. The Colonel rode about sixteen
+stone, and with spurs! 'I mean,' I added hastily, 'I should have
+been--only, to tell you the truth, I couldn't conscientiously trust any
+one on him but myself.'
+
+'My dear fellow!' said the Colonel, who I could see was offended, 'I've
+not met many horses in my time that I couldn't get upon terms with.'
+
+'I think Mr. Pulvertoft is _quite_ right,' said Diana. 'When a horse
+gets accustomed to one he does so resent a strange hand: it spoils his
+temper for days. I never will lend Wild Rose to anybody for that very
+reason!'
+
+The Colonel fell back in the rear in a decided sulk. 'Poor dear Colonel
+Cockshott!' said Diana, 'he is so proud of his riding, but _I_ think he
+dragoons a horse. I don't call that _riding_, do you?'
+
+'Well--hardly,' I agreed, with easy disparagement. 'I never believe in
+ruling a horse by fear.'
+
+'I suppose you are very fond of yours?' she said.
+
+'Fond is not the word!' I exclaimed--and it certainly was not.
+
+'I am not sure that what I said about lending Wild Rose would apply to
+_you_,' she said. 'I think you would be gentle with her.'
+
+I was certain that I should treat her with all consideration; but as I
+doubted whether she would wholly reciprocate it, I said with much
+presence of mind, that I should regard riding her as akin to
+profanation.
+
+As Brutus and I were going home, he observed that it was a good thing I
+had not agreed to lend him to the Colonel.
+
+'Yes,' I said, determined to improve the occasion, 'you might not have
+found him as considerate as--well, as some people!'
+
+'I meant it was a good thing for _you_!' he hinted darkly, and I did not
+care to ask for an explanation. 'What did you mean,' he resumed, 'by
+saying that I should not admire Wild Rose? Why, she is
+charming--charming!'
+
+'In that case,' I said, 'I don't mind riding with her mistress
+occasionally--to oblige you.'
+
+'You don't mind!' he said; 'you will _have_ to, my boy,--and every
+afternoon!'
+
+I suppressed a chuckle: after all, man _is_ the nobler animal. I could
+manage a horse--in my own way. My little _ruse_ had succeeded: I should
+have no more forced introductions to mystified strangers.
+
+And now for some weeks my life passed in a happy dream. I only lived for
+those hours in the Row, where Brutus turned as naturally to Wild Rose as
+the sunflower to the sun, and Diana and I grew more intimate every day.
+Happiness and security made me almost witty. I was merciless in my
+raillery of the eccentric exhibitions of horsemanship which were to be
+met with, and Diana was provoked by my comments to the sweetest silvery
+laughter. As for Colonel Cockshott, whom I had once suspected of a
+desire to be my rival, he had long become a 'negligible quantity;' and
+if I delayed in asking Diana to trust me with her sweet self, it was
+only because I found an epicurean pleasure in prolonging a suspense that
+was so little uncertain.
+
+And then, without warning, my riding was interrupted for a while. Brutus
+was discovered, much to his annoyance, to have a saddle-raw, and was
+even so unjust as to lay the blame on me, though, for my own part, I
+thought it a mark of apt, though tardy, retribution. I was not disposed
+to tempt Fortune upon any other mount, but I could not keep away from
+the Row, nevertheless, and appeared there on foot. I saw Diana riding
+with the Colonel, who seemed to think his opportunity had come at last;
+but whenever she passed the railings on which I leaned, she would raise
+her eyebrows and draw her mouth down into a little curve of resigned
+boredom, which completely reassured me. Still, I was very glad when
+Brutus was well again, and we were cantering down the Row once more,
+both in the highest spirits.
+
+'I never heard the horses here _whinny_ so much as they do this season,'
+I said, by way of making conversation. 'Can you account for it at all?'
+For he sometimes gave me pieces of information which enabled me to
+impress Diana afterwards by my intimate knowledge of horses.
+
+'Whinnying?' he said. 'They're _laughing_, that's what they're
+doing--and no wonder!'
+
+'Oh!' said I, 'and what's the joke?'
+
+'Why, _you_ are!' he replied. 'You don't suppose you take _them_ in, do
+you? They know all about you, bless your heart!'
+
+'Oh, do they?' I said blankly. This brute took a positive pleasure, I
+believe, in reducing my self-esteem.
+
+'I dare say it has got about through Wild Rose,' he continued. 'She was
+immensely tickled when I told her. I'm afraid she must have been feeling
+rather dull all these days, by the bye.'
+
+I felt an unworthy impulse to take his conceit down as he had lowered
+mine.
+
+'Not so very, I think,' I said. 'She seemed to me to find that brown
+hunter of Colonel Cockshott's a very agreeable substitute.'
+
+Late as it is for reparation, I must acknowledge with shame that in
+uttering this insinuation, I did that poor little mare (for whom I
+entertained the highest respect) a shameful injustice; and I should like
+to state here, in the most solemn and emphatic manner, my sincere belief
+that, from first to last, she conducted herself in a manner that should
+have shielded her from all calumny.
+
+It was only a mean desire to retaliate, a petty and ignoble spite, that
+prompted me thus to poison Brutus's confidence, and I regretted the
+words as soon as I had uttered them.
+
+'That beast!' he said, starting as if I had touched him with a whip--a
+thing I never used--'why, he hasn't two ideas in his great fiddle-head.
+The only sort of officer _he_ ought to carry is a Salvationist!'
+
+'I grant he has not your personal advantages and charm of manner,' I
+said. 'No doubt I was wrong to say anything about it.'
+
+'No,' he said, 'you--you have done me a service,' and he relapsed into a
+sombre silence.
+
+I was riding with Diana as usual, and was about to express my delight at
+being able to resume our companionship, when her mare drew slightly
+ahead and lashed out suddenly, catching me on the left leg, and causing
+intense agony for the moment.
+
+Diana showed the sweetest concern, imploring me to go home in a cab at
+once, while her groom took charge of Brutus. I declined the cab; but, as
+my leg was really painful, and Brutus was showing an impatience I dared
+not disregard, I had to leave her side.
+
+On our way home, Brutus said moodily, 'It is all over between us--you
+saw that?'
+
+'I felt it!' I replied. 'She nearly broke my leg.'
+
+'It was intended for me,' he said. 'It was her way of signifying that we
+had better be strangers for the future. I taxed her with her
+faithlessness; she denied it, of course--every mare does; we had an
+explanation, and everything is at an end!'
+
+I did not ride him again for some days, and when I did, I found him
+steeped in Byronic gloom. He even wanted at first to keep entirely on
+the Bayswater side of the Park, though I succeeded in arguing him out of
+such weakness. 'Be a horse!' I said. 'Show her you don't care. You only
+flatter her by betraying your feelings.'
+
+This was a subtlety that had evidently not occurred to him, but he was
+intelligent enough to feel the force of what I said. 'You are right,' he
+admitted; 'you are not quite a fool in some respects. She shall see how
+little I care!'
+
+Naturally, after this, I expected to accompany Diana as usual, and it
+was a bitter disappointment to me to find that Brutus would not hear of
+doing so. He had an old acquaintance in the Park, a dapple-grey, who,
+probably from some early disappointment was a confirmed cynic, and whose
+society he thought would be congenial just then. The grey was ridden
+regularly by a certain Miss Gittens, whose appearance as she titupped
+laboriously up and down had often furnished Diana and myself with
+amusement.
+
+And now, in spite of all my efforts, Brutus made straight to the grey. I
+was not in such difficulties as might have been expected, for I happened
+to know Miss Gittens slightly, as a lady no longer in the bloom of
+youth, who still retained a wiry form of girlishness. Though rather
+disliking her than not, I found it necessary just then to throw some
+slight effusion into my greeting. She, not unnaturally perhaps, was
+flattered by my preference, and begged me to give her a little
+instruction in riding, which--Heaven forgive me for it!--I took upon
+myself to do.
+
+Even now I scarcely see how I could have acted otherwise: I could not
+leave her side until Brutus had exhausted the pleasures of cynicism with
+his grey friend, and the time had to be filled up somehow. But, oh, the
+torture of seeing Diana at a distance, and knowing that only a miserable
+misunderstanding between our respective steeds kept us apart, feeling
+constrained even to avoid looking in her direction, lest she should
+summon me to her side!
+
+One day, as I was riding with Miss Gittens, she glanced coyly at me
+over her sharp right shoulder, and said, 'Do you know, only such a
+little while ago, I never even dreamed that we should ever become as
+intimate as we are now; it seems almost incredible, does it not?'
+
+'You must not say so,' I replied. 'Surely there is nothing singular in
+my helping you a little with your riding?' Though it struck me that it
+would have been very singular if I had.
+
+'Perhaps not singular,' she murmured, looking modestly down her nose;
+'but will you think me very unmaidenly if I confess that, to me, those
+lessons have developed a dawning danger?'
+
+'You are perfectly safe on the grey,' I said.
+
+'I--I was not thinking of the grey,' she returned. 'Dear Mr. Pulvertoft,
+I must speak frankly--a girl has so many things to consider, and I am
+afraid you have made me forget how wrongly and thoughtlessly I have been
+behaving of late. I cannot help suspecting that you must have some
+motive in seeking my society in so--so marked a manner.'
+
+'Miss Gittens,' said I, 'I can disguise nothing: I have.'
+
+'And you have not been merely amusing yourself all this time?'
+
+'Before Heaven,' I cried with fervour, 'I have _not_!'
+
+'You are not one of those false men who give their bridle-reins a
+shake, and ride off with "Adieu for evermore!"--tell me you are not?'
+
+I might shake _my_ bridle-reins till I was tired and nothing would come
+of it unless Brutus was in the humour to depart; so that I was able to
+assure her with truth that I was not at all that kind of person.
+
+'Then why not let your heart speak?'
+
+'There is such a thing,' I said gloomily, 'as a heart that is gagged.'
+
+'Can no word, no hint of mine loosen the gag?' she wished to know.
+'What, you are silent still? Then, Mr. Pulvertoft, though I may seem
+harsh and cruel in saying it, our pleasant intercourse must end--we must
+ride together no more!'
+
+No more? What would Brutus say to that? I was horrified. 'Miss Gittens,'
+I said in great agitation, 'I entreat you to unsay those words. I--I am
+afraid I could not undertake to accept such a dismissal. Surely, after
+that, you will not insist!'
+
+She sighed. 'I am a weak, foolish girl,' she said; 'you are only too
+able to overcome my judgment. There, Mr. Pulvertoft, look happy again--I
+relent. You may stay if you will!'
+
+You must believe that I felt thoroughly ashamed of myself, for I could
+not be blind to the encouragement which, though I sought to confine my
+words to strict truth, I was innocently affording. But, with a horse
+like mine, what was a man to do? What would you have done yourself? As
+soon as was prudent, I hinted to Brutus that his confidences had lasted
+long enough; and as he trotted away with me, he remarked, 'I thought you
+were never going.' Was he weary of the grey already? My heart leaped.
+'Brutus,' I said thickly, 'are you strong enough to bear a great joy?'
+
+'Speak out,' he said, 'and do try to keep those heels out of my ribs.'
+
+'I cannot see you suffer,' I told him, with a sense of my own hypocrisy
+all the time. 'I must tell you--circumstances have come to my knowledge
+which lead me to believe that we have both judged Wild Rose too hastily.
+I am sure that her heart is yours still. She is only longing to tell you
+that she has never really swerved from her allegiance.'
+
+'It is too late now,' he said, and the back of his head looked
+inflexibly obstinate; 'we have kept asunder too long.'
+
+'No,' I said, 'listen. I take more interest in you than you are,
+perhaps, aware of, and I have thought of a little plan for bringing you
+together again. What if I find an opportunity to see the lady she
+belongs to--we have not met lately, as you know, and I do not pretend
+that I desire a renewal of our intimacy----'
+
+'You like the one on the grey best; I saw that long ago,' he said; and I
+left him in his error.
+
+'In any case, for your sake, I will sacrifice myself,' I said
+magnanimously. 'I will begin to-morrow. Come, you will not let your
+lives be wrecked by a foolish lovers' quarrel?'
+
+He made a little half-hearted opposition, but finally, as I knew he
+would, consented. I had gained my point: I was free from Miss Gittens at
+last!
+
+That evening I met Diana in the hall of a house in Eaton Square. She was
+going downstairs as I was making my way to the ball-room, and greeted me
+with a rather cool little nod.
+
+'You have quite deserted me lately,' she said, smiling, but I could read
+the reproach in her eyes, 'you never ride with us now.'
+
+My throat was swelling with passionate eloquence--and I could not get
+any of it out.
+
+'No, I never do,' was all my stupid tongue could find to say.
+
+'You have discovered a more congenial companion,' said cruel Diana.
+
+'Miss Chetwynd,' I said eagerly, 'you don't know how I have been
+wishing--! Will you let me ride with you to-morrow, as--as you used to
+do?'
+
+'You are quite sure you won't be afraid of my naughty Wild Rose?' she
+said. 'I have given her such a scolding, that I think she is thoroughly
+ashamed of herself.'
+
+'You thought it was _that_ that kept me!' I cried. 'Oh, if I could tell
+you!'
+
+She smiled: she was my dear, friendly Diana again.
+
+'You shall tell me all about it to-morrow,' she said. 'You will not
+have another opportunity, because we are going to Aix on Friday. And
+now, good-night. I am stopping the way, and the linkman is getting quite
+excited over it.'
+
+She passed on, and the carriage rolled away with her, and I was too
+happy to mind very much--had she not forgiven me? Should we not meet
+to-morrow? I should have two whole hours to declare myself in, and this
+time I would dally with Fortune no longer.
+
+How excited I was the following day: how fearful, when the morning broke
+grey and lowering: how grateful, when the benignant sun shone out later,
+and promised a brilliant afternoon: how carefully I dressed, and what a
+price I paid for the flower for my buttonhole!
+
+So we cantered on to the Row, as goodly a couple (if I may be pardoned
+this retrospective vanity) as any there; and by and by, I saw, with the
+quick eye of a lover, Diana's willowy form in the distance. She was not
+alone, but I knew that the Colonel would soon have to yield his place to
+me.
+
+As soon as she saw me, she urged her mare to a trot, and came towards me
+with the loveliest faint blush and dawning smile of welcome, when, all
+at once, Brutus came to a dead stop, which nearly threw me on his neck,
+and stood quivering in every limb.
+
+'Do you see that?' he said hoarsely. 'And I was about to forgive her!'
+
+I saw: my insinuation, baseless enough at the beginning, was now but too
+well justified. Colonel Cockshott was on his raw-boned brown hunter, and
+even my brief acquaintance with horses enabled me to see that Wild Rose
+no longer regarded him with her former indifference.
+
+Diana and the Colonel had reined up and seemed waiting for me--would
+Brutus never move? 'Show your pride,' I said in an agonised whisper,
+'Treat her with the contempt she deserves!'
+
+'I will,' he said between his bit and clenched teeth.
+
+And then Miss Gittens came bumping by on the grey, and, before I could
+interfere, my Houyhnhnm was off like a shot in pursuit. I saw Diana's
+sweet, surprised face: I heard the Colonel's jarring laugh as I passed,
+and I--I could only bow in mortified appeal, and long for a gulf to leap
+into like Curtius!
+
+I don't know what I said to Miss Gittens. I believe I made myself
+recklessly amiable, and I remember she lingered over parting in a
+horribly emotional manner. I was too miserable to mind: all the time I
+was seeing Diana's astonished eyes, hearing Colonel Cockshott's
+heartless laugh. Brutus made a kind of explanation on our way home: 'You
+meant well,' he said, 'but you see you were wrong. Your proposed
+sacrifice, for which I am just as grateful to you as if it had been
+effected, was useless. All I could do in return was to take you where
+your true inclination lay. I, too, can be unselfish.'
+
+I was too dejected to curse his unselfishness. I did not even trouble
+myself to explain what it had probably cost me. I only felt drearily
+that I had had my last ride, I had had enough of horsemanship for ever!
+
+That evening I went to the theatre, I wanted to deaden thought for the
+moment; and during one of the intervals I saw Lady Verney in the stalls,
+and went up to speak to her. 'Your niece is not with you?' I said; 'I
+thought I should have had a chance of--of saying good-bye to her before
+she left for the continent.'
+
+I had a lingering hope that she might ask me to lunch, that I might have
+one more opportunity of explaining.
+
+'Oh,' said Lady Verney, 'but that is all changed; we are not going--at
+least, not yet.'
+
+'Not going!' I cried, incredulous for very joy.
+
+'No, it is all very sudden; but,--well, you are almost like an old
+friend, and you are sure to hear it sooner or later. I only knew myself
+this afternoon, when she came in from her ride. Colonel Cockshott has
+proposed and she has accepted him. We're _so_ pleased about it. Wasn't
+dear Mrs. ---- delightful in that last act? I positively saw real tears
+on her face!'
+
+If I had waited much longer she would have seen a similar display of
+realism on mine. But I went back and sat the interval out, and listened
+critically to the classical selection of chamber-music from the
+orchestra, and saw the rest of the play, though I have no notion how it
+ended.
+
+All that night my heart was slowly consumed by a dull rage that grew
+with every sleepless hour; but the object of my resentment was not
+Diana. She had only done what as a woman she was amply justified in
+doing after the pointed slight I had apparently inflicted upon her. Her
+punishment was sufficient already, for, of course, I guessed that she
+had only accepted the Colonel under the first intolerable sting of
+desertion. No: I reserved all my wrath for Brutus, who had betrayed me
+at the moment of triumph. I planned revenge. Cost what it might I would
+ride him once more. In the eyes of the law I was his master. I would
+exercise my legal rights to the full.
+
+The afternoon came at last. I was in a white heat of anger, though as I
+ascended to the saddle there were bystanders who put a more uncharitable
+construction upon my complexion.
+
+Brutus cast an uneasy eye at my heels as we started: 'What are those
+things you've got on?' he inquired.
+
+'Spurs,' I replied curtly.
+
+'You shouldn't wear them till you have learnt to turn your toes in,' he
+said. 'And a whip, too! May I ask what that is for?'
+
+'We will discuss that presently,' I said very coldly; for I did not want
+to have a scene with my horse in the street.
+
+When we came round by the statue of Achilles and on to the Ride, I
+shortened my reins, and got a better hold of the whip, while I found
+that, from some cause I cannot explain, the roof of my mouth grew
+uncomfortably dry.
+
+'I should be glad of a little quiet talk with you, if you've no
+objection,' I began.
+
+'I am quite at your disposal,' he said, champing his bit with a touch of
+irony.
+
+'First, let me tell you,' I said, 'that I have lost my only love for
+ever.'
+
+'Well,' he retorted flippantly, 'you won't die of it. So have I. We must
+endeavour to console one another!'
+
+I still maintained a deadly calm. 'You seem unaware that you are the
+sole cause of my calamity,' I said. 'Had you only consented to face Wild
+Rose yesterday, I should have been a happy man by this time!'
+
+'How was I to know that, when you let me think all your affections were
+given to the elderly thing who is trotted out by my friend the grey?'
+
+'We won't argue, please,' I said hastily. 'It is enough that your
+infernal egotism and self-will have ruined my happiness. I have allowed
+you to usurp the rule, to reverse our natural positions. I shall do so
+no more. I intend to teach you a lesson you will never forget.'
+
+For a horse, he certainly had a keen sense of humour. I thought the
+girths would have snapped.
+
+'And when do you intend to begin?' he asked, as soon as he could speak.
+
+I looked in front of me: there were Diana and her accepted lover riding
+towards us; and so natural is dissimulation, even to the sweetest and
+best women, that no one would have suspected from her radiant face that
+her gaiety covered an aching heart.
+
+'I intend to begin _now_,' I said. 'Monster, demon, whatever you are
+that have held me in thrall so long, I have broken my chains! I have
+been a coward long enough. You may kill me if you like. I rather hope
+you will; but first I mean to pay you back some of the humiliation with
+which you have loaded me. I intend to thrash you as long as I remain in
+the saddle.'
+
+I have been told by eye-witnesses that the chastisement was of brief
+duration, but while it lasted, I flatter myself, it was severe. I laid
+into him with a stout whip, of whose effectiveness I had assured myself
+by experiments upon my own legs. I dug my borrowed spurs into his
+flanks. I jerked his mouth. I dare say he was almost as much surprised
+as pained. But he _was_ pained!
+
+I was about to continue my practical rebuke, when my victim suddenly
+evaded my grasp; and for one vivid second I seemed to be gazing upon a
+birdseye view of his back; and then there was a crash, and I lay,
+buzzing like a bee, in an iridescent fog, and each colour meant a
+different pain, and they faded at last into darkness, and I remember no
+more.
+
+'It was weeks,' concluded Mr. Pulvertoft, 'before that darkness lifted
+and revealed me to myself as a strapped and bandaged invalid. But--and
+this is perhaps the most curious part of my narrative--almost the first
+sounds that reached my ears were those of wedding bells; and I knew,
+without requiring to be told, that they were ringing for Diana's
+marriage with the Colonel. _That_ showed there wasn't much the matter
+with me, didn't it? Why, I can hear them everywhere now. I don't think
+she ought to have had them rung at Sandown though: it was just a little
+ostentatious, so long after the ceremony; don't you think so?'
+
+'Yes--yes,' I said; 'but you never told me what became of the horse.'
+
+'Ah! the horse--yes. I am looking for him. I'm not so angry with him as
+I was, and I don't like to ask too many questions at the stables, for
+fear they may tell me one day that they had to shoot him while I was so
+ill. You knew I was ill, I dare say?' he broke off: 'there were
+bulletins about me in the papers. Look here.'
+
+He handed me a cutting on which I read:
+
+'THE RECENT ACCIDENT IN ROTTEN ROW.--There is no change as yet in Mr.
+Pulvertoft's condition. The unfortunate gentleman is still lying
+unconscious at his rooms in Park Street; and his medical attendants fear
+that, even if he recovers his physical strength, the brain will be
+permanently injured.'
+
+'But that was all nonsense!' said Mr. Pulvertoft, with a little nervous
+laugh, 'it wasn't injured a bit, or how could I remember everything so
+clearly as I do, you know?'
+
+And this was an argument that was, of course, unanswerable.
+
+
+
+
+_THE GOOD LITTLE GIRL_
+
+A STORY FOR CHILDREN
+
+
+Her name was Priscilla Prodgers, and she was a very good little girl
+indeed. So good was she, in fact, that she could not help being aware of
+it herself, and that is a stage to which very many quite excellent
+persons never succeed in attaining. She was only just a child, it is
+true, but she had read a great many beautiful story-books, and so she
+knew what a powerful reforming influence a childish and innocent remark,
+or a youthful example, or a happy combination of both, can exert over
+grown-up people. And early in life--she was but eleven at the date of
+this history--early in life she had seen clearly that her mission was to
+reform her family and relatives generally. This was a heavy task for one
+so young, particularly in Priscilla's case, for, besides a father,
+mother, brother, and sister, in whom she could not but discern many and
+serious failings, she possessed an aunt who was addicted to insincerity,
+two female cousins whose selfishness and unamiability were painful to
+witness, and a male cousin who talked slang and was so worldly that he
+habitually went about in yellow boots! Nevertheless Priscilla did not
+flinch, although, for some reason, her earnest and unremitting efforts
+had hitherto failed to produce any deep impression. At times she thought
+this was owing to the fact that she tried to reform all her family
+together, and that her best plan would be to take each one separately,
+and devote her whole energies to improving that person alone. But then
+she never could make up her mind which member of the family to begin
+with. It is small wonder that she often felt a little disheartened, but
+even that was a cheering symptom, for in the books it is generally just
+when the little heroine becomes most discouraged that the seemingly
+impenitent relative exhibits the first sign of softening.
+
+So Priscilla persevered: sometimes with merely a shocked glance of
+disapproval, which she had practised before the looking-glass until she
+could do it perfectly; sometimes with some tender, tactful little hint.
+'Don't you think, dear papa,' she would say softly, on a Sunday morning,
+'don't you _think_ you could write your newspaper article on some
+_other_ day--is it a work of _real_ necessity?' Or she would ask her
+mother, who was certainly fond of wearing pretty things. 'How much bread
+for poor starving people would the price of your new bonnet buy, mother?
+I should so like to work it out on my little slate!'
+
+Then she would remind her brother Alick that it would be so much better
+if, instead of wasting his time in playing with silly little tin
+soldiers, he would try to learn as much as he could before he was sent
+to school; while she was never tired of quoting to her sister Betty the
+line, 'Be good, sweet maid, and let who will be clever!' which Betty,
+quite unjustly, interpreted to mean that Priscilla thought but poorly of
+her sister's intellectual capacity. Once when, as a great treat, the
+children were allowed to read 'Ivanhoe' aloud, Priscilla declined to
+participate until she had conscientiously read up the whole Norman
+period in her English history; and on another occasion she cried
+bitterly on hearing that her mother had arranged for them to learn
+dancing, and even endured bread and water for an entire day rather than
+consent to acquire an accomplishment which she feared, from what she had
+read, would prove a snare. On the second day--well, there was roast beef
+and Yorkshire pudding for dinner, and Priscilla yielded; but she made
+the resolution--and kept it too--that, if she went to the dancing class,
+she would firmly refuse to take the slightest pains to learn a single
+step.
+
+I only mention all these traits to show that Priscilla really was an
+unusually good child, which makes it the more sad and strange that her
+family should have profited so little by her example. She was neither
+loved nor respected as she ought to have been, I am grieved to say. Her
+papa, when he was not angry, made the cruellest fun of her mild
+reproofs; her mother continued to spend money on dresses and bonnets,
+and even allowed the maid to say that her mistress was 'not at home,'
+when she was merely unwilling to receive visitors. Alick and Betty, too,
+only grew more exasperated when Priscilla urged them to keep their
+tempers, and altogether she could not help feeling how wasted and thrown
+away she was in such a circle.
+
+But she never quite lost heart; her papa was a literary man and wrote
+tales, some of which she feared were not as true as they affected to be,
+while he invariably neglected to insert a moral in any of them;
+frequently she dropped little remarks before him with apparent
+carelessness, in the hope that he might put them in print--but he never
+did; she never could recognise herself as a character in any of his
+stories, and so at last she gave up reading them at all!
+
+But one morning she came more near to giving up in utter despair than
+ever before. Only the previous day she had been so hopeful! her father
+had really seemed to be beginning to appreciate his little daughter, and
+had presented her with sixpence in the new coinage to put in her
+money-box. This had emboldened her to such a degree that, happening on
+the following morning to hear him ejaculate 'Confound it!' she had,
+pressing one hand to her beating heart and laying the other hand softly
+upon his shoulder (which is the proper attitude on these occasions),
+reminded him that such an expression was scarcely less reprehensible
+than actual bad language. Upon which her hard-hearted papa had told her,
+almost sharply, '_not to be a little prig!_'
+
+Priscilla forgave him, of course, and freely, because he was her father
+and it was her duty to bear with him; but she felt the injustice deeply,
+for all that. Then, when she went up into the nursery, Alick and Betty
+made a frantic uproar, merely because she insisted on teaching them the
+moves in chess, when they perversely wanted to play Halma! So, feeling
+baffled and sick at heart, she had put on her hat and run out all alone
+to a quiet lane near her home, where she could soothe her troubled mind
+by thinking over the ingratitude and lack of appreciation with which her
+efforts were met.
+
+She had not gone very far up the lane when she saw, seated on a bench, a
+bent old woman in a poke-bonnet with a crutch-handled stick in her
+hands, and this old woman Priscilla (who was very quick of observation)
+instantly guessed to be a fairy--in which, as it fell out, she was
+perfectly right.
+
+'Good day, my pretty child!' croaked the old dame.
+
+'Good-day to you, ma'am!' answered Priscilla politely (for she knew that
+it was not only right but prudent to be civil to fairies, particularly
+when they take the form of old women). 'But, if you please, you mustn't
+call me pretty--because I am not. At least,' she added, for she prided
+herself upon her truthfulness, 'not _exactly_ pretty. And I should hate
+to be always thinking about my looks, like poor Milly--she's our
+housemaid, you know--and I so often have to tell her that she did not
+make her _own_ face.'
+
+'I don't alarm you, I see,' said the old crone; 'but possibly you're not
+aware that you're talking to a fairy?'
+
+'Oh, yes, I am--but I'm not a bit afraid, because, you see, fairies can
+only hurt _bad_ children.'
+
+'Ah, and you're a good little child--that's not difficult to see!'
+
+'They don't see it at home!' said Priscilla, with a sad little sigh, 'or
+they would listen more when I tell them of things they oughtn't to do.'
+
+'And what things do they do that they oughtn't to, my child--if you
+don't mind telling me?'
+
+'Oh, I don't mind in the _least_!' Priscilla hastened to assure her; and
+then she told the old woman all her family's faults, and the trial it
+was to bear with them and go on trying to induce them to mend their
+ways. 'And papa is getting worse than ever,' she concluded dolefully;
+'only fancy, this very morning he called me a little prig!'
+
+'Tut, tut!' said the fairy sympathetically, 'deary, deary me! So he
+called you _that_, did he?--"a little prig"! And _you_, too! Ah, the
+world's coming to a pretty pass! I suppose, now, your papa and the rest
+of them have got it into their heads that you are too young and too
+inexperienced to set up as their adviser--is that it?'
+
+'I'm afraid so,' admitted Priscilla; 'but we mustn't blame them,' she
+added gently, 'we must remember that they don't know any better--mustn't
+we, ma'am?'
+
+'You sweet child!' said the old lady with enthusiasm; 'I must see if I
+can't do something to help you, though I'm not the fairy I used to
+be--still, there are tricks I can manage still, if I'm put to it. What
+you want is something that will prove to them that they ought to pay
+more attention to you, eh?--something there can be no possible mistake
+about?'
+
+'Yes!' cried Priscilla eagerly, 'and--and--how would it be if you
+changed them into something else, just to _show_ them, and then I could
+ask for them to be transformed back again, you know?'
+
+'What an ingenious little thing you are!' exclaimed the fairy; 'but, let
+us see--if you came home and found your cruel papa doing duty as the
+family hatstand, or strutting about as a Cochin China fowl----'
+
+'Oh, _yes_; and I'd feed him every day, till he was sorry!' interrupted
+the warmhearted little girl impulsively.
+
+'Ah, but you're so hasty, my dear. Who would write all the clever
+articles and tales to earn bread and meat for you all?--fowls can't use
+a pen. No, we must find a prettier trick than that--there _was_ one I
+seem to remember, long, long ago, performing for a good little ill-used
+girl, just like you, my dearie, just like you! Now what was it? some
+gift I gave her whenever she opened her lips----'
+
+'Why, _I_ remember--how funny that you should have forgotten! Whenever
+she opened her lips, roses, and diamonds, and rubies fell out. That
+would be the very thing! Then they'd _have_ to attend to me! Oh, do be a
+kind old fairy and give me a gift like that--do, _do_!'
+
+'Now, don't be so impetuous! You forget that this is not the time of
+year for roses, and, as for jewels, well, I don't think I can be very
+far wrong in supposing that you open your lips pretty frequently in the
+course of the day?'
+
+'Alick does call me a "mag,"' said Priscilla; 'but that's wrong, because
+I never speak without having something to say. I don't think people
+ought to--it may do so _much_ harm; mayn't it?'
+
+'Undoubtedly. But, anyhow, if we made it _every_ time you opened your
+lips, you would soon ruin me in precious stones, that's plain! No, I
+think we had better say that the jewels shall only drop when you are
+saying something you wish to be particularly improving--how will that
+do?'
+
+'Very nicely indeed, ma'am, thank you,' said Priscilla, 'because, you
+see, it comes to just the same thing.'
+
+'Ah, well, try to be as economical of your good things as you
+can--remember that in these hard times a poor old fairy's riches are
+not as inexhaustible as they used to be.'
+
+'And jewels really will drop out?'
+
+'Whenever they are wanted to "point a moral and adorn a tale,"' said the
+old woman (who, for a fairy, was particularly well-read). 'There, run
+along home, do, and scatter your pearls before your relations.'
+
+It need scarcely be said that Priscilla was only too willing to obey;
+she ran all the way home with a light heart, eager to exhibit her
+wonderful gift. 'How surprised they will be!' she was thinking. 'If it
+had been Betty, instead of me, I suppose she would have come back
+talking toads! It would have been a good lesson for her--but still,
+toads are nasty things, and it would have been rather unpleasant for the
+rest of us. I think I won't tell Betty _where_ I met the fairy.'
+
+She came in and took her place demurely at the family luncheon, which
+was the children's dinner; they were all seated already, including her
+father, who had got through most of his writing in the course of the
+morning.
+
+'Now make haste and eat your dinner, Priscilla,' said her mother, 'or it
+will be quite cold.'
+
+'I always let it get a little cold, mother,' replied the good little
+girl, 'so that I mayn't come to think too much about eating, you know.'
+
+As she uttered this remark, she felt a jewel producing itself in some
+mysterious way from the tip of her tongue, and saw it fall with a
+clatter into her plate. 'I'll pretend not to notice anything,' she
+thought.
+
+'Hullo!' exclaimed Alick, pausing in the act of mastication, 'I
+say--_Prissie_!'
+
+'If you ask mother, I'm sure she will tell you that it is most
+ill-mannered to speak with your mouth full,' said Priscilla, her speech
+greatly impeded by an immense emerald.
+
+'I like that!' exclaimed her rude brother; 'who's speaking with their
+mouth full _now_?'
+
+'"_Their_" is not grammar, dear,' was Priscilla's only reply to this
+taunt, as she delicately ejected a pearl, 'you should say _her_ mouth
+full.' For Priscilla's grammar was as good as her principles.
+
+'But really, Priscilla, dear,' said her mother, who felt some
+embarrassment at so novel an experience as being obliged to find fault
+with her little daughter, 'you should not eat sweets just before dinner,
+and--and couldn't you get rid of them in some other manner?'
+
+'Sweets!' cried Priscilla, considerably annoyed at being so
+misunderstood, 'they are not _sweets,_ mother. Look!' And she offered to
+submit one for inspection.
+
+'If I may venture to express an opinion,' observed her father, 'I would
+rather that a child of mine should suck sweets than coloured beads, and
+in either case I object to having them prominently forced upon my
+notice at meal-times. But I daresay I'm wrong. I generally am.'
+
+'Papa is quite right, dear,' said her mother, 'it _is_ such a dangerous
+habit--suppose you were to swallow one, you know! Put them in the fire,
+like a good girl, and go on with your dinner.'
+
+Priscilla rose without a word, her cheeks crimsoning, and dropped the
+pearl, ruby, and emerald, with great accuracy, into the very centre of
+the fire. This done, she returned to her seat, and went on with her
+dinner in silence, though her feelings prevented her from eating very
+much.
+
+'If they choose to think my pearls are only beads, or jujubes, or
+acidulated drops,' she said to herself, bitterly, 'I won't waste any
+more on them, that's all! I won't open my lips again, except to say
+quite ordinary things--so _there_!'
+
+If Priscilla had not been such a very good little girl, you might almost
+have thought she was in a temper; but she was not; her feelings were
+wounded, that was all, which is quite a different thing.
+
+That afternoon, her aunt Margarine, Mrs. Hoyle, came to call. She was
+the aunt whom we have already mentioned as being given to insincerity;
+she was not well off, and had a tendency to flatter people; but
+Priscilla was fond of her notwithstanding, and she had never detected
+her in any insincerity towards herself. She was sent into the
+drawing-room to entertain her aunt until her mother was ready to come
+down, and her aunt, as usual, overwhelmed her with affectionate
+admiration. 'How pretty and well you are looking, my pet!' she began,
+'and oh, what a beautiful frock you have on!'
+
+'The little silkworms wore it before I did, aunt,' said Priscilla,
+modestly.
+
+'How sweet of you to say so! But they never looked half so well in it,
+I'll be bou---- Why, my child, you've dropped a stone out of a brooch or
+something. Look--on the carpet there!'
+
+'Oh,' said Priscilla, carelessly, 'it was out of my mouth--not out of a
+brooch, I never wear jewellery. I think jewellery makes people grow so
+conceited; don't you, Aunt Margarine?'
+
+'Yes, indeed, dearest--indeed you are _so_ right!' said her aunt (who
+wore a cameo-brooch as large as a tart upon her cloak), 'and--and surely
+that can't be a _diamond_ in your lap?'
+
+'Oh, yes, it is. I met a fairy this morning in the lane, and so----' and
+here Priscilla proceeded to narrate her wonderful experience. 'I thought
+it might perhaps make papa and mamma value me a little more than they
+do,' she said wistfully, as she finished her story, 'but they don't take
+the least notice; they made me put the jewels on the fire--they did,
+really!'
+
+'What blindness!' cried her aunt; 'how _can_ people shut their eyes to
+such a treasure? And--and may I just have _one_ look? What, you really
+don't want them?--I may keep them for my very own? You precious love!
+Ah, I know a humble home where you would be appreciated at your proper
+worth. What would I not give for my poor naughty Belle and Cathie to
+have the advantage of seeing more of such a cousin!'
+
+'I don't know whether I could do them much good,' said Priscilla, 'but I
+would try my best.'
+
+'I am sure you would!' said Aunt Margarine, 'and now, dearest sweet, I
+am going to ask your dear mamma to spare you to us for just a little
+while; we must both beg very hard.'
+
+'I'll go and tell nurse to pack my things now, and then I can go away
+with you,' said the little girl.
+
+When her mother heard of the invitation, she consented quite willingly.
+'To tell you the truth, Margarine,' she said, 'I shall be very glad for
+the child to have a change. She seems a little unhappy at home with us,
+and she behaved most unlike her usual self at lunch; it _can't_ be
+natural for a child of her age to chew large glass beads. Did your
+Cathie and Belle ever do such a thing?'
+
+'Never,' said Aunt Margarine, coughing. 'It is a habit that certainly
+ought to be checked, and I promise you, my dear Lucy, that if you will
+only trust Priscilla to me, I will take away anything of that kind the
+very moment I find it. And I do think, poor as we are, we shall manage
+to make her feel at home. We are all so fond of your sweet Priscilla!'
+
+So the end of it was that Priscilla went to stay with her aunt that
+very afternoon, and her family bore the parting with the greatest
+composure.
+
+'I can't give you nice food, or a pretty bedroom to sleep in such as you
+have at home,' said her kind aunt. 'We are very plain people, my pet;
+but at least we can promise you a warm welcome.'
+
+'Oh, auntie,' protested Priscilla, 'you mustn't think I mind a little
+hardship! Why, if beds weren't hard and food not nicely cooked now and
+then, we should soon grow too luxurious to do our duty, and that would
+be so very bad for us!'
+
+'Oh, what _beauties_!' cried her aunt, involuntarily, as she stooped to
+recover several sparkling gems from the floor of the cab. 'I mean--it's
+better to pick them up, dear, don't you think? they might get in
+people's _way_, you know. What a blessing you will be in our simple
+home! I want you to do all you can to instruct your cousins; don't be
+afraid of telling them of any faults you may happen to see. Poor Cathie
+and Belle, I fear they are very far from being all they should be!' and
+Aunt Margarine heaved a sigh.
+
+'Never mind, auntie; they will be better in time, I am sure. _I_ wasn't
+_always_ a good girl.'
+
+Priscilla thoroughly enjoyed the first few days of her visit; even her
+aunt was only too grateful for instruction, and begged that Priscilla
+would tell her, quite candidly, of any shortcomings she might notice.
+And Priscilla, very kindly and considerately, always _did_ tell her.
+Belle and Catherine were less docile, and she saw that it would take her
+some time to win their esteem and affection; but this was just what
+Priscilla liked: it was the usual experience of the heroines in the
+books, and much more interesting, too, than conquering her cousins'
+hearts at once.
+
+Still, both Catherine and Belle persistently hardened their hearts
+against their gentle little cousin in the unkindest way; they would
+scarcely speak to her, and chose to make a grievance out of the fact
+that one or other of them was obliged, by their mother's strict orders,
+to be constantly in attendance upon her, in order to pick up and bring
+Mrs. Hoyle all the jewels that Priscilla scattered in profusion wherever
+she went.
+
+'If you would only carry a plate about with you, Priscilla,' complained
+Belle one day, 'you could catch the jewels in that.'
+
+'But I don't _want_ to catch the jewels, dear Belle,' said Priscilla,
+with a playful but very sweet smile; 'if other people prize such things,
+that is not my fault, is it? _Jewels_ do not make people any happier,
+Belle!'
+
+'I should think not!' exclaimed Belle. 'I'm sure my back perfectly aches
+with stooping, and so does Cathie's. There! that big topaz has just gone
+and rolled under the sideboard, and mother will be so angry if I don't
+get it out! It is too bad of you, Priscilla! _I_ believe you do it on
+purpose!'
+
+'Ah, you will know me better some day, dear, was the gentle response.
+
+'Well, at all events, I think you might be naughty just now and then,
+Prissie, and give Cathie and me a half-holiday.'
+
+'I would do anything else to please you, dear, but not that; you must
+not ask me to do what is impossible.'
+
+Alas! not even this angelic behaviour, not even the loving admonitions,
+the tender rebukes, the shocked reproaches that fell, accompanied by
+perfect cascades of jewels, from the lips of our pattern little
+Priscilla, succeeded in removing the utterly unfounded prejudices of her
+cousins, though it was some consolation to feel that she was gradually
+acquiring a most beneficial influence over her aunt, who called
+Priscilla 'her little conscience.' For, you see, Priscilla's conscience
+had so little to do on her own account that it was always at the service
+of other people, and indeed quite enjoyed being useful, as was only
+natural to a conscientious conscience which felt that it could never
+have been created to be idle.
+
+Very soon another responsibility was added to little Priscilla's
+burdens. Her cousin Dick, the worldly one with the yellow boots, came
+home after his annual holiday, which, as he was the junior clerk in a
+large bank, he was obliged to take rather late in the year. She had
+looked forward to his return with some excitement. Dick, she knew, was
+frivolous and reckless in his habits--he went to the theatre
+occasionally and frequently spent an evening in playing billiards and
+smoking cigars at a friend's house. There would be real credit in
+reforming poor cousin Dick.
+
+He was not long, of course, in hearing of Priscilla's marvellous
+endowment, and upon the first occasion they were alone together treated
+her with a respect and admiration which he had very certainly never
+shown her before.
+
+'You're wonderful, Prissie!' he said; 'I'd no idea you had it in you!'
+
+'Nor had I, Dick; but it shows that even a little girl can do
+something.'
+
+'I should rather think so! and--and the way you look--as grave as a
+judge all the time! Prissie, I wish you'd tell me how you manage it, I
+wouldn't tell a soul.'
+
+'But I don't know, Dick. I only talk and the jewels come--that is all.'
+
+'You artful little girl! you can keep a secret, I see, but so can I. And
+you might tell me how you do the trick. What put you up to the dodge?
+I'm to be trusted, I assure you.'
+
+'Dick, you can't--you mustn't--think there is any trickery about it! How
+can you believe I could be such a wicked little girl as to play tricks?
+It was an old fairy that gave me the gift. I'm sure I don't know
+why--unless she thought that I was a good child and deserved to be
+encouraged.'
+
+'By Jove!' cried Dick, 'I never knew you were half such fun!'
+
+'I am not fun, Dick. I think fun is generally so very vulgar, and oh, I
+wish you wouldn't say "by Jove!" Surely you know he was a heathen god!'
+
+'I seem to have heard of him in some such capacity,' said Dick. 'I say,
+Prissie, what a ripping big ruby!'
+
+'Ah, Dick, Dick, you are like the others! I'm afraid you think more of
+the jewels than of any words I may say--and yet _jewels_ are common
+enough!'
+
+'They seem to be with you. Pearls, too, and such fine ones! Here,
+Priscilla, take them; they're your property.'
+
+Priscilla put her hands behind her: 'No, indeed, Dick, they are of no
+use to me. Keep them, please; they may help to remind you of what I have
+said.'
+
+'It's awfully kind of you,' said Dick, looking really touched.
+'Then--since you put it in that way--thanks, I will, Priscilla. I'll
+have them made into a horse-shoe pin.'
+
+'You mustn't let it make you too fond of dress, then,' said Priscilla;
+'but I'm afraid you're that already, Dick.'
+
+'A diamond!' he cried; 'go on, Priscilla, I'm listening--pitch into me,
+it will do me a _lot_ of good!'
+
+But Priscilla thought it wisest to say no more just then.
+
+That night, after Priscilla and Cathie and Belle had gone to bed, Dick
+and his mother sat up talking until a late hour.
+
+'Is dear little cousin Priscilla to be a permanency in this
+establishment?' began her cousin, stifling a yawn, for there had been a
+rather copious flow of precious stones during the evening.
+
+'Well, I shall keep her with us as long as I can,' said Mrs. Hoyle,
+'she's such a darling, and they don't seem to want her at home. I'm
+sure, limited as my means are, I'm most happy to have such a visitor.'
+
+'She seems to pay her way--only her way is a trifle trying at times,
+isn't it? She lectured me for half an hour on end without a single
+check!'
+
+'Are you sure you picked them all up, dear boy?'
+
+'Got a few of the best in my waistcoat-pocket now. I'm afraid I
+scrunched a pearl or two, though: they were all over the place, you
+know. I suppose you've been collecting too, mater?'
+
+'I picked up one or two,' said his mother; 'I should think I must have
+nearly enough now to fill a bandbox. And that brings me to what I wanted
+to consult you about, Richard. How are we to dispose of them? She has
+given them all to me.'
+
+'You haven't done anything with them yet, then?'
+
+'How could I? I have been obliged to stay at home: I've been so afraid
+of letting that precious child go out of my sight for a single hour,
+for fear some unscrupulous persons might get hold of her. I thought that
+perhaps, when you came home, you would dispose of the jewels for me.'
+
+'But, mater,' protested Dick, 'I can't go about asking who'll buy a
+whole bandbox full of jewels!'
+
+'Oh, very well, then; I suppose we must go on living this hugger-mugger
+life when we have the means of being as rich as princes, just because
+you are too lazy and selfish to take a little trouble!'
+
+'I know something about these things,' said Dick. 'I know a fellow who's
+a diamond merchant, and it's not so easy to sell a lot of valuable
+stones as you seem to imagine, mother. And then Priscilla really
+overdoes it, you know--why, if she goes on like this, she'll make
+diamonds as cheap as currants!'
+
+'_I_ should have thought that was a reason for selling them as soon as
+possible; but I'm only a woman, and of course _my_ opinion is worth
+nothing! Still, you might take some of the biggest to your friend, and
+accept whatever he'll give you for them--there are plenty more, you
+needn't haggle over the price.'
+
+'He'd want to know all about them, and what should I say? I can't tell
+him a cousin of mine produces them whenever she feels disposed.'
+
+'You could say they have been in the family for some time, and you are
+obliged to part with them; I don't ask you to tell a falsehood,
+Richard.'
+
+'Well, to tell you the honest truth,' said Dick, 'I'd rather have
+nothing to do with it. I'm not proud, but I shouldn't like it to get
+about among our fellows at the bank that I went about hawking diamonds.'
+
+'But, you stupid, undutiful boy, don't you see that you could leave the
+bank--you need never do anything any more--we should all live rich and
+happy somewhere in the country, if we could only sell those jewels! And
+you won't do that one little thing!'
+
+'Well,' said Dick, 'I'll think over it. I'll see what I can do.'
+
+And his mother knew that it was perfectly useless to urge him any
+further: for, in some things, Dick was as obstinate as a mule, and, in
+others, far too easy-going and careless ever to succeed in life. He had
+promised to think over it, however, and she had to be contented with
+that.
+
+On the evening following this conversation cousin Dick entered the
+sitting-room the moment after his return from the City, and found his
+mother to all appearances alone.
+
+'What a dear sweet little guileless angel cousin Priscilla is, to be
+sure!' was his first remark.
+
+'Then you _have_ sold some of the stones!' cried Aunt Margarine. 'Sit
+down, like a good boy, and tell me all about it.'
+
+'Well,' said Dick, 'I took the finest diamonds and rubies and pearls
+that escaped from that saintlike child last night in the course of some
+extremely disparaging comments on my character and pursuits--I took
+those jewels to Faycett and Rosewater's in New Bond Street--you know the
+shop, on the right-hand side as you go up----'
+
+'Oh, go on, Dick; go on--never mind _where_ it is--how much did you get
+for them?'
+
+'I'm coming to that; keep cool, dear mamma. Well, I went in, and I saw
+the manager, and I said: "I want you to make these up into a horse-shoe
+scarf-pin for me."'
+
+'You said that! You never tried to sell one? Oh, Dick, you are too
+provoking!'
+
+'Hold on, mater; I haven't done yet. So the manager--a very gentlemanly
+person, rather thin on the top of the head--not that that affects his
+business capacities; for, after all----'
+
+'Dick, do you want to drive me frantic!'
+
+'I can't conceive any domestic occurrence which would be more
+distressing or generally inconvenient, mother dear. You do interrupt a
+fellow so! I forgot where I was now--oh, the manager, ah yes! Well, the
+manager said, "We shall be very happy to have the stones made in any
+design you may select"--jewellery, by the way, seems to exercise a most
+refining influence upon the manners: this man had the deportment of a
+duke--"you may select," he said; "but of course I need not tell you that
+none of these stones are genuine."'
+
+'Not genuine!' cried Aunt Margarine excitedly. 'They must be--he was
+lying!'
+
+'West-end jewellers never lie,' said Dick; 'but naturally, when he said
+that, I told him I should like to have some proof of his assertion.
+"Will you take the risk of testing?" said he. "Test away, my dear man!"
+said I. So he brought a little wheel near the emerald--"whizz!" and away
+went the emerald! Then he let a drop of something fall on the ruby--and
+it fizzled up for all the world like pink champagne. "Go on, don't mind
+_me_!" I told him, so he touched the diamond with an electric
+wire--"phit!" and there was only something that looked like the ash of a
+shocking bad cigar. Then the pearls--and they popped like so many
+air-balloons. "Are you satisfied?" he asked.
+
+'"Oh, perfectly,"' said I, "you needn't trouble about the horse-shoe pin
+now. Good evening," and so I came away, after thanking him for his very
+amusing scientific experiments.'
+
+'And do you believe that the jewels are all shams, Dick?--do you
+really?'
+
+'I think it so probable that nothing on earth will induce me to offer a
+single one for sale. I should never hear the last of it at the bank. No,
+mater, dear little Priscilla's sparkling conversation may be unspeakably
+precious from a moral point of view, but it has no commercial value.
+Those jewels are bogus--shams every stone of them!'
+
+Now, all this time our heroine had been sitting unperceived in a corner
+behind a window-curtain, reading 'The Wide, Wide World,' a work which
+she was never weary of perusing. Some children would have come forward
+earlier, but Priscilla was never a forward child, and she remained as
+quiet as a little mouse up to the moment when she could control her
+feelings no longer.
+
+'It isn't true!' she cried passionately, bursting out of her retreat and
+confronting her cousin; 'it's cruel and unkind to say my jewels are
+shams! They are real--they are, they _are_!'
+
+'Hullo, Prissie!' said her abandoned cousin; 'so you combine
+jewel-dropping with eaves-dropping, eh?'
+
+'How dare you!' cried Aunt Margarine, almost beside herself, 'you odious
+little prying minx, setting up to teach your elders and your betters
+with your cut and dried priggish maxims! When I think how I have petted
+and indulged you all this time, and borne with the abominable litter you
+left in every room you entered--and now to find you are only a little,
+conceited, hypocritical impostor--oh, _why_ haven't I words to express
+my contempt for such conduct--why am I dumb at such a moment as this?'
+
+'Come, mother,' said her son soothingly, 'that's not such a bad
+beginning; I should call it fairly fluent and expressive, myself.'
+
+'Be quiet, Dick! I'm speaking to this wicked child, who has obtained our
+love and sympathy and attention on false pretences, for which she ought
+to be put in prison--yes, in _prison_, for such a heartless trick on
+relatives who can ill afford to be so cruelly disappointed!'
+
+'But, aunt!' expostulated poor Priscilla, 'you always said you only kept
+the jewels as souvenirs, and that it did you so much good to hear me
+talk!'
+
+'Don't argue with _me_, miss! If I had known the stones were wretched
+tawdry imitations, do you imagine for an instant----?'
+
+'Now, mother,' said Dick, 'be fair--they were uncommonly good
+imitations, you must admit that!'
+
+'Indeed, indeed I thought they were real, the fairy never told me!'
+
+'After all,' said Dick, 'it's not Priscilla's fault. She can't help it
+if the stones aren't real, and she made up for quality by quantity
+anyhow; didn't you, Prissie?'
+
+'Hold your tongue, Richard; she _could_ help it, she knew it all the
+time, and she's a hateful, sanctimonious little stuck-up viper, and so I
+tell her to her face!'
+
+Priscilla could scarcely believe that kind, indulgent, smooth-spoken
+Aunt Margarine could be addressing such words to her; it frightened her
+so much that she did not dare to answer, and just then Cathie and Belle
+came into the room.
+
+'Oh, mother,' they began penitently, 'we're _so_ sorry, but we couldn't
+find dear Prissie anywhere, so we haven't picked up anything the whole
+afternoon!'
+
+'Ah, my poor darlings, you shall never be your cousin's slaves any more.
+Don't go near her, she's a naughty, deceitful wretch; her jewels are
+false, my sweet loves, false! She has imposed upon us all, she does not
+deserve to associate with you!'
+
+'I always said Prissie's jewels looked like the things you get on
+crackers!' said Belle, tossing her head.
+
+'Now we shall have a little rest, I hope,' chimed in Cathie.
+
+'I shall send her home to her parents this very night,' declared Aunt
+Margarine; 'she shall not stay here to pervert our happy household with
+her miserable _gewgaws_!'
+
+Here Priscilla found her tongue. 'Do you think I _want_ to stay?' she
+said proudly; 'I see now that you only wanted to have me here
+because--because of the horrid jewels, and I never knew they were false,
+and I let you have them all, every one, you know I did; and I wanted you
+to mind what I said and not trouble about picking them up, but you
+_would_ do it! And now you all turn round upon me like this! What have I
+done to be treated so? What have I done?'
+
+'Bravo, Prissie!' cried Dick. 'Mother, if you ask me, I think it serves
+us all jolly well right, and it's a downright shame to bullyrag poor
+Prissie in this way!'
+
+'I _don't_ ask you,' retorted his mother, sharply; 'so you will kindly
+keep your opinions to yourself.'
+
+'Tra-la-la!' sang rude Dick, 'we are a united family--we are, we are, we
+_are_!'--a vulgar refrain he had picked up at one of the burlesque
+theatres he was only too fond of frequenting.
+
+But Priscilla came to him and held out her hand quite gratefully and
+humbly. 'Thank you, Dick,' she said; '_you_ are kind, at all events. And
+I am sorry you couldn't have your horse-shoe pin!'
+
+'Oh, _hang_ the horse-shoe pin!' exclaimed Dick, and poor Priscilla was
+so thoroughly cast down that she quite forgot to reprove him.
+
+She was not sent home that night after all, for Dick protested against
+it in such strong terms that even Aunt Margarine saw that she must give
+way; but early on the following morning Priscilla quitted her aunt's
+house, leaving her belongings to be sent on after her.
+
+She had not far to walk, and it so happened that her way led through the
+identical lane in which she had met the fairy. Wonderful to relate,
+there, on the very same stone and in precisely the same attitude, sat
+the old lady, peering out from under her poke-bonnet, and resting her
+knotty old hands on her crutch-handled stick!
+
+Priscilla walked past with her head in the air, pretending not to
+notice her, for she considered that the fairy had played her a most
+malicious and ill-natured trick.
+
+'Heyday!' said the old lady (it is only fairies who can permit
+themselves such old-fashioned expressions nowadays). 'Heyday, why,
+here's my good little girl again! Isn't she going to speak to me?'
+
+'No, she's not,' said Priscilla--but she found herself compelled to
+stop, notwithstanding.
+
+'Why, what's all this about? You're not going to sulk with me, my dear,
+are you?'
+
+'I think you're a very cruel, bad, unkind old woman for deceiving me
+like this!'
+
+'Goodness me! Why, didn't the jewels come, after all?'
+
+'Yes--they came, only they were all horrid artificial ones--and it is a
+shame, it _is_!' cried poor Priscilla from her bursting heart.
+
+'Artificial, were they? that really is very odd! Can you account for
+that at all, now?'
+
+'Of course I can't! You told me that they would drop out whenever I said
+anything to improve people--and I was _always_ saying _something_
+improving! Aunt had a bandbox in her room quite full of them.'
+
+'Ah, you've been very industrious, evidently; it's unfortunate your
+jewels should all have been artificial--most unfortunate. I don't know
+how to explain it, unless'--(and here the old lady looked up queerly
+from under her white eyelashes), 'unless your goodness was artificial
+too?'
+
+'How do you mean?' asked Priscilla, feeling strangely uncomfortable.
+'I'm sure I've never done anything the least bit naughty--how can my
+goodness possibly be artificial?'
+
+'Ah, that I can't explain; but I know this--that people who are really
+good are generally the last persons to suspect it, and the moment they
+become aware of it and begin to think how good they are, and how bad
+everybody else is, why, somehow or other, their goodness crumbles away
+and leaves only a sort of outside shell behind it. And--I'm very old,
+and of course I may be mistaken--but I think (I only say I _think_,
+mind) that a little girl so young as you must have some faults hidden
+about her somewhere, and that perhaps on the whole she would be better
+employed in trying to find them out and cure them before she attempted
+to correct those of other people. And I'm sure it can't be good for any
+child to be always seeing herself in a little picture, just as she likes
+to fancy other people see her. Very many pretty books are written about
+good little girls, and it is quite true that children may exercise a
+great influence for good--more than they can ever tell, perhaps--but
+only just so long as they remain natural and unconscious, and not
+unwholesome little pragmatical prigesses; for then they make themselves
+and other people worse than they might have been. But of course, my
+dear, you never made such a mistake as that!'
+
+Priscilla turned very red, and began to scrape one of her feet against
+the other; she was thinking, and her thoughts were not at all pleasant
+ones.
+
+'Oh, fairy,' she said at last, 'I'm afraid that's just what I _did_ do.
+I was always thinking how good I was and putting everybody--papa, mamma,
+Alick, Betty, Aunt Margarine, Cathie, Belle, and even poor cousin
+Dick--right! I have been a horrid little hateful prig, and that's why
+all the jewels were rubbish. But, oh, shall I have to go on talking sham
+diamonds and things all the rest of my life?'
+
+'That,' said the fairy, 'depends entirely on yourself. You have the
+remedy in your own hands--or lips.'
+
+'Ah, you mean I needn't talk at all? But I must--sometimes. I couldn't
+bear to be dumb as long as I lived--and it would look so odd, too!'
+
+'I never said you were not to open your lips at all. But can't you try
+to talk simply and naturally--not like little girls or boys in any
+story-books whatever--not to "show off" or improve people; only as a
+girl would talk who remembers that, after all, her elders are quite as
+likely as she is to know what they ought or ought not to do and say?'
+
+'I shall forget sometimes, I know I shall!' said Priscilla
+disconsolately.
+
+'If you do, there will be something to remind you, you know. And by and
+by, perhaps, as you grow up you may, quite by accident, say something
+sincere and noble and true--and then a jewel will fall which will really
+be of value!'
+
+'No!' cried Priscilla, 'no, _please_! Oh, fairy, let me off that! If I
+_must_ drop them, let them be false ones to punish me--not real. I don't
+want to be rewarded any more for being good--if I ever am really good!'
+
+'Come,' said the fairy, with a much pleasanter smile, 'you are not a
+hopeless case, at all events. It shall be as you wish, then, and perhaps
+it will be the wisest arrangement for all parties. Now run away home,
+and see how little use you can make of your fairy gift.'
+
+Priscilla found her family still at breakfast.
+
+'Why,' observed her father, raising his eyebrows as she entered the
+room, 'here's our little monitor--(or is it _monitress_, eh,
+Priscilla?)--back again. Children, we shall all have to mind our p's and
+q's--and, indeed, our entire alphabet, now!'
+
+'I'm sure,' said her mother, kissing her fondly, 'Priscilla knows we're
+all delighted to have her home!'
+
+'_I'm_ not,' said Alick, with all a boy's engaging candour.
+
+'Nor am I,' added Betty, 'it's been ever so much nicer at home while
+she's been away!'
+
+Priscilla burst into tears as she hid her face upon her mother's
+protecting shoulder. 'It's true!' she sobbed, 'I don't deserve that you
+should be glad to see me--I've been hateful and horrid, I know--but, oh,
+if you'll only forgive me and love me and put up with me a little, I'll
+try not to preach and be a prig any more--I will truly!'
+
+And at this her father called her to his side and embraced her with a
+fervour he had not shown for a very long time.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+I should not like to go so far as to assert that no imitation diamond,
+ruby, pearl, or emerald ever proceeded from Priscilla's lips again.
+Habits are not cured in a day, and fairies--however old they may be--are
+still fairies; so it _did_ occasionally happen that a mock jewel made an
+unwelcome appearance after one of Priscilla's more unguarded utterances.
+But she was always frightfully ashamed and abashed by such an accident,
+and buried the imitation stones immediately in a corner of the garden.
+And as time went on the jewels grew smaller and smaller, and frequently
+dissolved upon her tongue, leaving a faintly bitter taste, until at last
+they ceased altogether and Priscilla became as pleasant and unaffected a
+girl as she who may now be finishing this history.
+
+Aunt Margarine never sent back the contents of that bandbox; she kept
+the biggest stones and had a brooch made of them, while, as she never
+mentioned that they were false, no one out of the family ever so much
+as suspected it.
+
+But, for all that, she always declared that her niece Priscilla had
+bitterly disappointed her expectations--which was perhaps the truest
+thing that Aunt Margarine ever said.
+
+
+
+
+_A MATTER OF TASTE_
+
+PART I
+
+
+It is a little singular that, upon an engagement becoming known and
+being discussed by the friends and acquaintances of the persons
+principally concerned, by far the most usual tone of comment should be a
+sorrowing wonder. That particular alliance is generally the very last
+that anybody ever expected. 'What made him choose _her_, of all people,'
+and 'What on earth she could see in _him_,' are declared insoluble
+problems. It is confidently predicted that the engagement will never
+come to anything, or that, if such a marriage ever does take place, it
+is most unlikely to prove a success.
+
+Sometimes, in the case of female friends, this tone is even perceptible
+under their warmest felicitations, and through the smiling mask of
+compliment shine eyes moist with the most irritating quality of
+compassion. 'So glad! so delighted! But why, _why_ didn't you consult
+_me_?'--this complicated expression might be rendered: 'I could have
+saved you from this--I _was_ so pleased to hear of it!'
+
+And yet, in the majority of cases, these unions are not found to turn
+out so very badly after all, and the misguided couple seem really to
+have gauged their own hearts and their possibilities of happiness
+together more accurately than the most clear-sighted of their
+acquaintances.
+
+The announcement that Ella Hylton had accepted George Chapman provoked
+the customary sensation and surprise in their respective sets, and
+perhaps with rather more justification than usual.
+
+Miss Hylton had undeniable beauty of a spiritual and rather _exalte_
+type, and was generally understood to be highly cultivated. She had
+spent a year at Somerville, though she had gone down without trying for
+a place in either 'Mods.' or 'Greats,' thereby preserving, if not
+increasing, her reputation for superiority. She had lived all her life
+among cultured people; she was devoted to music and regularly attended
+the Richter Concerts, though she could seldom be induced to play in
+public; she had a feeling for art, though she neither painted nor drew;
+a love of literature strong enough to deter her from all amateur efforts
+in that direction. In art, music and literature she was impatient of
+mediocrity; and, while she was as fond as most girls of the pleasures
+which upper middle-class society can offer, she reverenced intellect,
+and preferred the conversation of the plainest celebrity to the
+platitudes of the mere dancing-man, no matter how handsome of feature
+and perfect of step he might be.
+
+George Chapman was certainly not a mere dancing-man, his waltzing being
+rather conscientious than dreamlike, and he was only tolerably
+good-looking. On the other hand, he was not celebrated in any way, and
+even his mother and sisters had never considered him brilliant. He had
+been educated at Rugby and Trinity, Cambridge, where he rowed a fairly
+good oar, on principle, and took a middle second in the Moral Science
+Tripos. Now he was in a solicitor's office, where he was receiving a
+good salary, and was valued as a steady, sensible young fellow, who
+could be thoroughly depended upon. He was fond of his profession, and
+had acquired a considerable knowledge of its details; apart from it he
+had no very decided tastes; he lived a quiet, regular life, and dined
+out and went to dances in moderation; his manner, though he was nearly
+twenty-six, was still rather boyishly blunt.
+
+What there was in him that had found favour in Ella Hylton's fastidious
+eyes the narrator is not rash enough to attempt to particularise. But it
+may be suggested that the most unlikely people may possess their fairy
+rose and ring which render them irresistible to at least one heart, if
+they only have faith to believe in and luck to perceive their power.
+
+So, early in the year, George had plucked up courage to propose to Miss
+Hylton, after meeting and secretly adoring her for some months past, and
+she, to the general astonishment, had accepted him.
+
+He had a private income--not a large one--of his own, and had saved out
+of it. She was entitled under her grandmother's will to a sum which made
+her an heiress in a modest way, and thus there was no reason why the
+engagement should be a long one, and, though no date had been definitely
+fixed for the marriage, it was understood that it should take place at
+some time before the end of the summer.
+
+Soon after the engagement, however, an invalid aunt with whom Ella had
+always been a great favourite was ordered to the south of France, and
+implored her to go with her; which Ella, who had a real affection for
+her relative, as well as a strong sense of duty, had consented to do.
+
+This was a misfortune in one of two ways: it either curtailed that most
+necessary and most delightful period during which _fiances_ discover one
+another's idiosyncrasies and weaknesses, or it made it necessary to
+postpone the marriage.
+
+George naturally preferred the former, as the more endurable evil; but
+Ella's letters from abroad began to hint more and more plainly at delay.
+Her aunt might remain on the Continent all the summer, and she could not
+possibly leave her; there was so much to be done after her return that
+could not be done in a hurry; they had not even begun to furnish the
+pretty little house on Campden Hill that was to be their new home--it
+would be better to wait till November, or even later.
+
+The mere idea was alarming to George, and he remonstrated as far as he
+dared; but Ella remained firm, and he grew desperate.
+
+He might have spared himself the trouble. About the middle of June
+Ella's aunt--who, of course, had had to leave the Riviera--grew tired of
+travelling, and Ella, to George's intense satisfaction, returned to her
+mother's house in Linden Gardens, Notting Hill.
+
+And now, when our story opens, George, who had managed to get away from
+office-work two hours before his usual time, was hurrying towards Linden
+Gardens as fast as a hansom could take him, to see his betrothed for the
+first time after their long separation.
+
+He was eager, naturally, and a little nervous. Would Ella still persist
+in her wish for delay? or would he be able to convince her that there
+were no obstacles in the way? He felt he had strong arguments on his
+side, if only--and here was the real seat of his anxiety--if only her
+objections were not raised from some other motive! She might have been
+trying to prepare him for a final rupture, and then--'Well,' he
+concluded, with his customary good sense, 'no use meeting trouble
+halfway--in five minutes I shall know for certain!'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+At the same moment Mrs. Hylton and her daughter Flossie, a vivacious
+girl in the transitionary sixteen-year-old stage, were in the
+drawing-room at Linden Gardens. It was the ordinary double drawing-room
+of a London house, but everything in it was beautiful and harmonious.
+The eye was vaguely rested by the delicate and subdued colour of walls
+and hangings; cabinets, antique Persian pottery, rare bits of china, all
+occupied the precise place in which their decorative value was most
+felt; a room, in short, of exceptional individuality and distinction.
+
+Flossie was standing at the window, from which a glimpse could just be
+caught of fresh green foliage and the lodge-gates, with the bustle of
+the traffic in the High Street beyond; Mrs. Hylton was writing at a
+Flemish bureau in the corner.
+
+'I suppose,' said Flossie meditatively, as she fingered a piece of old
+stained glass that was hanging in the window, 'we shall have George here
+this afternoon.'
+
+Mrs. Hylton raised her head. She had a striking face, tinted a clear
+olive, with a high wave of silver hair crowning the forehead; her
+eyebrows were dark, and so were the brilliant eyes; the nose was
+aquiline, and the thin, well-cut mouth a little hard. She was a woman
+who had been much admired in her time, and who still retained a certain
+attraction, though some were apt to find her somewhat cold and
+unsympathetic. Her daughter Ella, for example, was always secretly a
+little in awe of her mother, who, however, had no terrors for audacious,
+outspoken Flossie.
+
+'If he comes, Flossie, he will be very welcome,' she said, 'but I hardly
+expect him yet. George is not likely to neglect his duties, even for
+Ella.'
+
+Flossie pursed her mouth rather scornfully: 'Oh, George is immaculate!'
+she murmured.
+
+'If he was, it would hardly be a reproach,' said her mother, catching
+the word; 'but, at all events, George has thoroughly good principles,
+and is sure to succeed in the world. I have every reason to be pleased.'
+
+'Every reason?--ah! but _are_ you pleased? Mother, dear, you know he's
+as dull as dull!'
+
+'Ella does not find him so--and, Flossie, I don't like to hear you say
+such things, even in Ella's absence.'
+
+'Oh, I never abuse him to Ella; it wouldn't be any use: she's firmly
+convinced that he's perfection--at least she was before she went away.'
+
+'Why? do you mean that she has altered?--have you seen any sign of it,
+Flossie?'
+
+Mrs. Hylton made this inquiry sharply, but not as if such a circumstance
+would be altogether displeasing to her.
+
+'Oh, no; only she hasn't seen him for so long, you know. Perhaps, when
+she comes to look at him with fresh eyes, she'll notice things more. Ah,
+here _is_ George, just getting out of a hansom--so he has played truant
+for once! There's one thing I _do_ think Ella might do--persuade him to
+shave off some of those straggly whiskers. I wonder why he never seems
+to get a hat or anything else like other people's!'
+
+Presently George was announced. He was slightly above middle height,
+broad-shouldered and fresh-coloured; the obnoxious whiskers did indeed
+cover more of his cheeks than modern fashion prescribes for men of his
+age, and had evidently never known a razor; he wore a turn-down collar
+and a necktie of a rather crude red; his clothes were neat and well
+brushed, but not remarkable for their cut.
+
+'Well, my dear George,' said Mrs. Hylton, 'we have seen very little of
+you while Ella has been away.'
+
+'I know,' he said awkwardly; 'I've had a lot of things to look after in
+one way and another.'
+
+'What? after your work at the office was over!' cried Flossie
+incredulously.
+
+'Yes--after that; it's taken up my time a good deal.'
+
+'And so you couldn't spare any to call here--I see!' said Flossie.
+'George,' she added, with a sudden diversion, 'I wonder you aren't
+afraid of catching cold! How _can_ you go about in such absurdly thin
+boots as those?'
+
+'These?' he said, inspecting them doubtfully--they were strong, sensible
+boots with notched and projecting soles of ponderous thickness--'why,
+what's the matter with them, Flossie, eh? Don't you think they're strong
+enough for walking in?'
+
+'No, George; they're the very things for an afternoon dance, and quite a
+lot of couples could dance in them, you see. But for walking--ah, I'm
+afraid you sacrifice too much to appearances.'
+
+'I don't, really!' George protested in all good faith; 'now _do_ I, Mrs.
+Hylton?'
+
+'Flossie is making fun of you, George; you mustn't mind her
+impertinence.'
+
+'Oh, is that all? Do you know, I really thought for the moment that she
+meant they were too small for me! You like getting a rise out of me,
+Flossie, don't you?'
+
+And he laughed with such genuine and good-natured amusement that the
+young lady felt somehow a little small, and almost ashamed, although it
+took the form of suppressed irritation. 'He really ought not to come
+here in such things,' she said to herself; 'and I don't believe that,
+even now, he sees what I meant.'
+
+Just at this point Ella came in, with the least touch of shyness,
+perhaps, at meeting him before witnesses after so long an absence; but
+she only looked the more charming in consequence, and, demure as her
+greeting was, her pretty eyes had a sparkle of pleasure that scattered
+all George Chapman's fears to the winds. Even Flossie felt instinctively
+that straggly-whiskered, red-necktied, thick-booted George had lost
+none of his divinity for Ella.
+
+They did not seem to have much to say to one another, notwithstanding;
+possibly because Ella was called upon to dispense the tea which had just
+been brought in. George sat nursing the hat which Flossie found so
+objectionable, while he balanced a teacup with the anxious eye of a
+juggler out of practice, and the conversation flagged. At last, under
+pretence of renewing his tea, most of which he had squandered upon a
+Persian rug, he crossed to Ella: 'I say,' he suggested, 'don't you think
+you could come out for a little while? I've such lots to tell you
+and--and I want you to go somewhere with me.'
+
+Mrs. Hylton made no objection, beyond stipulating that Ella must not be
+allowed to tire herself after her journey, and so, a few minutes later,
+Miss Hylton came down in her pretty summer hat and light cape, and she
+and George were allowed to set out.
+
+Once outside the house, he drew a long breath of mingled relief and
+pleasure: 'By Jove, Ella, I am glad to get you back again! I say, how
+jolly you do look in that hat! Now, do you know where I'm going to take
+you?'
+
+'It will be quietest in the Gardens,' said Ella.
+
+'Ah, but that's not where you're going now,' he said with a delicious
+assumption of authority; 'you're coming with me to see a certain house
+on Campden Hill you may have heard of.'
+
+'That will be delightful. I do want to see our dear little house again
+very much. And, George, we will go carefully over all the rooms, and
+settle what can be done with each of them. Then we can begin directly;
+we haven't too much time.'
+
+'Perhaps,' he said with a conscious laugh, 'it won't take so much time
+as you think.'
+
+'Oh, but it _must_--to do properly. And while I've been away I've had
+some splendid ideas for some of the rooms--I've planned them out so
+beautifully. You know that delightful little room at the back?--the one
+I said should be your own den, with the window all festooned with
+creepers and looking out on the garden--well----?'
+
+'Take my advice,' he said, 'and don't make any plans till you see it.
+And as for plans, these furnishing fellows do all that--they don't care
+to be bothered with plans.'
+
+'They will have to carry out ours, though. I shall love settling how it
+is all to be--it will be such fun.'
+
+'You wouldn't call it fun if you knew what it was like, I can tell you.'
+
+'But I _do_ know. Mother and I rearranged most of the rooms at home only
+last year--so you see I have some experience. And what experience can
+_you_ have had, if you please?'
+
+Ella had a mental vision as she spoke of the house in Dawson Place when
+George lived with his mother and sisters--a house in which furniture and
+everything else were commonplace and _bourgeois_ to the last degree,
+and where nothing could have been altered since his boyhood; indeed she
+had often secretly pitied him for having to live in such surroundings,
+and admired the filial patience that had made him endure them so long.
+
+'I've had my share, Ella, and I should be very sorry for you to have all
+the worry and bother I've been through over it!'
+
+'But when, George? How? I don't understand.'
+
+'Ah, that's my secret!' he said provokingly; 'and you know, Ella, if we
+began furnishing now, it would take no end of a time, with all these
+wonderful plans of yours, and--and I couldn't stand having to wait till
+next November for you--I couldn't do it!'
+
+'Mother thinks the marriage need not be put off now,' said Ella simply,
+'and we shall have six weeks till then; the house can be quite ready for
+us by the time we want it.'
+
+'Six weeks!' he said impatiently, 'what's six weeks? You've no idea what
+these chaps are, Ella! And then there are all your own things to get,
+and they would take up most of your time. No, we should have had to put
+it off, whatever you may say. And that would mean another
+separation--for, of course, you would go away in August, and I should
+have to stay in town: the office wouldn't give me my fortnight twice
+over--honeymoon or no honeymoon!'
+
+Ella looked completely puzzled. 'But what are you trying to prove
+_now_, George?'
+
+'I was only showing you that, even though you have come back earlier, we
+couldn't possibly have got things ready in time, if I hadn't----' but
+here he stopped. 'No, I want that to be a surprise for you, Ella; you'll
+see presently,' he added.
+
+Ella's delicate eyebrows contracted. 'I like to be prepared for my
+surprises, please, George. Tell me now.'
+
+They had turned up one of the quiet streets leading to the hill. They
+were so near the house that George thought he might abandon further
+mystery, not to mention that he was only too anxious to reveal his
+secret.
+
+'Well, then, Ella, if you must have it,' he said triumphantly, 'the
+house is very nearly ready _now_--what do you think of that?'
+
+'Do you mean that--that it is furnished, George?'
+
+'Papered, painted, decorated, furnished--everything, from top to bottom!
+I thought that would surprise you, Ella!'
+
+'I think,' she answered slowly, 'you might have told me you were doing
+it.'
+
+'What! before it was all done? That would have spoilt it all, dear. I
+should have written, though, if you hadn't been coming home so soon. And
+now it's finished I must say it looks uncommonly jolly. I'm sure you'll
+be pleased with it--it looks quite a different place.'
+
+She tried to smile: 'And did you do it all yourself, George?'
+
+'Well, no--not exactly. I flatter myself I know how to see that the
+work's properly done, and all that; but there are some things I don't
+pretend to be much of a hand at, so I got certain ladies to give me some
+wrinkles.'
+
+Ella felt relieved. She was disappointed, it is true--hurt, even, at
+having been deprived of any voice in the matter. She had been looking
+forward so much to carrying out her pet schemes, to enjoying her
+friends' admiration of the wonders wrought by her artistic invention.
+And she had never thought of George, somehow, as likely to have any
+strikingly original ideas on the subject of decoration, although she
+liked him none the less for that.
+
+But it was something that he had had the good sense to take her mother
+and Flossie into his confidence: she knew she could trust them to
+preserve him from any serious mistakes.
+
+'You see,' said George, half apologetically, 'I would ever so much
+rather have waited till you came back, only I couldn't tell when that
+would be. I really couldn't help myself. You're sure you don't mind
+about it? If you only knew how I worked over it, rushing about from one
+place to another, as soon as I could get away from the office, picking
+up bits of furniture here and there, standing over those beggars of
+painters and keeping 'em at it, and working out estimates and seeing
+foremen and managers and all kinds of chaps! I used to get home
+dead-tired of an evening; but I didn't mind that: I felt it was all
+bringing you nearer to me, darling, and that made everything a
+pleasure!'
+
+There was such honest affection in his look and voice; he had so
+evidently intended to please her, and had been in such manifest dread of
+any further separation from her, that she was completely disarmed.
+
+'Dear George,' she said gently, 'I am so sorry you took all the trouble
+on yourself; it was very, very good of you to care so much, and I know I
+shall be delighted with the house.'
+
+'Well,' said George, 'I'm not much afraid about that, because I expect
+our tastes are pretty much the same in most things.'
+
+They were by this time at the house, and George, after a little fumbling
+with his as yet unfamiliar latchkey, threw open the door with a flourish
+and said, 'There you are, little woman! Walk in and you'll see what you
+shall see!'
+
+No sooner was Ella inside the hall than her heart sank: 'Looks neat and
+nice, doesn't it?' said George cheerfully. 'You'd almost take that paper
+for real marble, wouldn't you? See how well they've done those veins. I
+like this yellowish colour better than green, don't you? It looks so
+cool in summer. That's a good strong hall-lamp--not what you call high
+art, exactly--but gives a rattling good light, and that's the main
+thing. Here, I'll light it up for you--confound it! they haven't turned
+the gas on yet. However, there's too much sunshine for it to show much,
+if they had. This linoleum is a capital thing: you might scrub as long
+as you liked and you'd never get _that_ pattern out!'
+
+'No,' Ella agreed, with a tragic little smile, 'it--it looks as if it
+would last.'
+
+'Last! I should just think so! And here's a hatstand--you could almost
+swear it was carved wood of some sort, but it's only cast-iron painted;
+indestructible, you see; they told me that was the latest
+dodge--wonderful how cheaply they turn them out, isn't it?'
+
+'I thought you said you were helped?'
+
+'Oh, I didn't want any help _here_--this is only the passage, you know!'
+
+Yes, it was only the passage--and yet she had been picturing such a
+charming entrance, with a draped arch, a graceful lamp, a fresh bright
+paper, a small buffet of genuine old oak, and so on. She suppressed a
+sigh as she passed on; after all, so long as the rooms themselves were
+all right, it did not so very much matter, and she knew that her
+mother's taste could be trusted.
+
+But on the threshold of the dining-room she stopped aghast. The walls
+had been distempered a particularly hideous drab; the curtains were
+mustard yellow; the carpet was a dull brown; the mottled marble
+mantelpiece, for which she had been intending to substitute one in
+walnut wood with tiles, still shone in slabs of petrified brawn; there
+was a huge mahogany sideboard of a kind she had only seen in
+old-fashioned hotels.
+
+'Comfortable, eh?' remarked George. 'Lots of wear in those curtains!'
+
+Unhappily there was, as Ella was only too well aware. 'You did _this_
+room yourself too, then, George?' she managed to say, without betraying
+herself by her voice.
+
+'Yes, I chose everything here. You see, Ella, we shall only use this
+room for meals.'
+
+'Only for meals, yes,' she acquiesced with a shudder; 'but--George,
+surely you said mother had helped you with the rooms?'
+
+'What! your mother? No, Ella; her notions are rather too grand for me.
+It was Jessie and Carrie I meant. Just come and see what they've made of
+my den.'
+
+Ella followed. The window--which had commanded such a cheerful outlook
+into one of the pretty gardens, with a pink thorn, a laburnum-tree or
+two, and some sycamores which still flourish fresh and fair on Campden
+Hill--was obscured now by some detestable contrivance in transparent
+paper imitating stained glass.
+
+'That was the girls' notion,' said George, following the direction of
+her eyes; 'they fixed it all themselves--it was their present to me.
+Pretty of them to think of it, wasn't it? I call it an immense
+improvement, and, you see, it's stuck on with some patent cement
+varnish, so it can't rub off. You get the effect better if you stand
+here--_now_, see how well the colours come out in the sun!'
+
+If only they _would_ come out! But what could she do but stand and
+admire hypocritically? Her eyes, in spite of herself, seemed drawn to
+that bright-hued sham intersected by black lines intended to represent
+leading; of the room itself she only saw vaguely that it was not
+unworthy of the window.
+
+'Nothing to what they've done with the drawing-room!' said innocent
+George, beaming; 'come along, darling, you'll scarcely know the place.'
+
+And Ella, reduced to a condition of stony stupor, followed to the
+drawing-room. She did not know the place, indeed. It was a
+quaintly-shaped, irregular room, with French windows opening upon the
+garden on one side and a deep bow-window on another; when she had last
+seen it, the walls were covered with a paper so pleasing in tone and
+design that she had almost decided to retain it. That paper was gone,
+and in its place a gaudy semi-Chinese pattern of unknown birds, flying
+and perching on sprawling branches laden with impossible flowers. And
+then the furniture--the 'elegant drawing-room suite' in brilliant plush
+and shiny satin, the cheap cabinets, and the ready-made black and gilt
+overmantel, with its panels of swans, hawthorn-blossom, and landscapes
+sketchily daubed on dead gold--surely it had all been transferred bodily
+from the stage of some carelessly mounted farcical comedy!
+
+Ella's horrified gaze gradually took in other features--the china
+monkeys swinging on cords, the porcelain parrots hanging in great brass
+rings, huge misshapen terra-cotta jars and pots, dead grass in bloated
+drain-pipes, tambourines, beribboned and painted with kittens and
+robins, enormous wooden _sabots_, gilded Japanese fans, a woolly white
+rug and a bright Kidderminster carpet.
+
+'_Oh_, George!' burst involuntarily from her lips.
+
+'I knew you'd be pleased!' he said complacently; 'but I mustn't take all
+the credit myself. It was like this, you see: I felt all right enough
+about the other rooms, but the drawing-room--that's _your_ room, and I
+was awfully afraid of not having it exactly as it ought to be. So I went
+to the girls, and I said, "_You_ know all about these things--just make
+it what you think Ella will like, and then we can't go wrong!" We had
+that Grosvenor Gallery paper down first of all. "Choose something bright
+and cheerful," I said, and I don't think they've chosen badly. Then the
+pottery and china and all that--those are the girls' presents to _you_,
+with their best love.'
+
+'It--it's very good of them,' said poor Ella, on the verge of tears.
+
+'Oh, they think a lot of you! They were rather nervous about doing
+anything at first, for fear you mightn't like it; but I told them they
+needn't be afraid. "What I like, Ella will like," I said; and, I must
+say, no one could wish to see a prettier drawing-room than they've
+turned it into--they've a good deal of taste, those two girls.'
+
+Ella stood there in a kind of dreary dream. What had happened to the
+world since she came into this house? What was this change in her? She
+was afraid to speak, lest the intense rebellious anger she felt should
+gain the mastery. Was it she that had these wicked thoughts of
+George--poor, kind, unsuspecting, loving George? She felt a little
+faint, for the windows were closed and the room stuffy with the odour of
+the new furniture and the atmosphere of the workshop; everything here
+seemed to her commonplace and repulsive.
+
+'How about those plans of yours now, Ella, eh?' cried George.
+
+This was too much; her overtried patience broke down. 'George!' she
+cried impulsively, and her voice sounded hoarse and strange to her own
+ear; 'George! I must speak--I must tell you!----' and then she checked
+herself. She must keep command of herself, or she could not, without
+utter loss of dignity, find the words that were to sting him into a
+sense of what he had done and allowed to be done. Before she could go
+on, George had drawn her to him, and was patting her shoulder tenderly.
+'I know, dear little girl,' he said, 'I know; don't try to tell me
+anything. I'm so awfully glad you're pleased; but all the money and
+pains in the world wouldn't make the place good enough for my Ella!'
+
+She released herself with a little cry of impotent despair. How could
+she say the sharp, cruel speeches that were struggling to reach her
+tongue now? It was no use; she was a coward; she simply had not the
+courage to undeceive him here, on the very first day of their reunion,
+too!
+
+'You haven't been upstairs yet,' said George, dropping sentiment
+abruptly; 'shall we go up?'
+
+Ella assented submissively, much as even this cost her; but it was
+better, she reflected, to get it over and know the very worst. However,
+she was spared this ordeal for the present; as they returned to the
+hall, they found themselves suddenly face to face with a dingy man,
+whose face was surrounded by a fringe of black whiskers and crowned by a
+shock of fleecy hair.
+
+'Who on earth are you?' demanded George, as the man rose from the
+kitchen-stairs.
+
+'No offence, sir and lady! Peagrum, that's _my_ name, fust shop round
+the corner as you go into Silver Street, plumber and sanitry hengineer,
+gas-fittin' and hartistic decorating, bell-'anging in all its branches.
+I received instructions from Mr. Jones that I was to look into a little
+matter o' leakage in the back-kitchen sink; also to see what taps, if
+hany, required seein' to, and gen'ally to put things straight like. So I
+come round, 'aving the keys, jest to cast a heye over them, as I may
+term it, preliminry to commencing work in the course of a week or so, as
+soon as I'm at libity to attend to it pussonally.'
+
+'Oh, the landlord sent you? All right, then.'
+
+'Correct, sir,' said the plumber affably. 'While I've been 'ere, I took
+the freedom of going all over this little 'ouse, and a nice cosy little
+'ouse you've made of it, for such a nouse as it is! You've done it up
+very tysty--very tysty you've done this little 'ouse up; and I've some
+claim to speak, seein' as how I've had the decoration throughout of a
+many 'ouses in my time, likewise mansions. You ain't been too ambitious,
+which is the error most parties falls into with small 'ouses. Now the
+parties as 'ad the place before you--by the name o' Rummles--well, I
+daresay they satisfied theirselves, but the 'ouse never looked
+right--not to _my_ taste, it didn't!'
+
+'George, get rid of this person!' said Ella rapidly, under her breath,
+in French. Unfortunately, George's acquaintance with that tongue was
+about on a par with the plumber's, and he remained passive.
+
+The plumber now proceeded to put down his mechanic's straw-bag upon the
+hall-table, which he did with great care, as if it were of priceless
+stuff and contained fragile articles; having done this, he posed himself
+with one elbow resting on the post at the foot of the staircase, like a
+grimy statue of Shakespeare.
+
+'Ah,' he said, shaking his touzled head, 'this ain't the fust time I've
+been 'ere in my puffessional capacity, not by a long way. Not by a long
+way, it ain't. Mr. Rummles, him as I mentioned to you afore, and a nice
+pleasant-spoken gentleman he was, too--in the tea trade--Mr. Rummles, he
+allus sent round for me whenever there was hany odd jobs as wanted
+doin', and in course I was allus pleased to get 'em, be they hodd or
+hotherwise.'
+
+'Er-exactly,' said George, as soon as he could put in a word; 'but you
+see, this lady and I----'
+
+The plumber, however, did not abandon his position, and seemed
+determined that they should hear him:
+
+'I know, sir--I see how things were with you with 'arf a glance; but
+afore we go any further, it's right you should know 'oo I am and all
+about me. Jest 'ear what I'm goin' to tell you, for it's somethink out
+of the common way, though gospel-truth. It's a melinkly reflection for a
+man in my station of life, but'--and here he lowered his voice to a
+solemn pitch--'I've never set foot inside of this 'ere 'ouse without
+somethink 'appens more or less immejit. Ah, it's true, though. Seems
+almost like as if I brought a fatality in along o' me. Don't you
+interrupt; you wait till I'm done, and see if I'm talking at random or
+without facks to support me. Well, _fust_ time as ever I was sent for
+'ere was in regard to drains, as they couldn't flush satisfactory. I did
+my work and come away. Not three weeks arter, Miss Rummles, the heldest
+gell, was took ill with typhoid. Never the same young lady again--nor
+yet she never won't be neither, not if she lives to a nundered. "Nothing
+very hodd about _that_?" says you. Wait a bit. Next time, it was the
+kitching copper as had got all furred up like. I tinkered that up to
+rights, and come away. Well, afore I'd even made out my account, that
+identical copper blew up and scalded the cook dreadful! "Coppers will
+play these games," you sez. All right, then; but you let me finish.
+Third time there was a flaw in one of the gas-brackets in the spare
+room. I soddered it up and I come away. Soon arterwards, a day or two as
+it might be, Mrs. Rummles 'ad 'er mar a-stayin' with her, and the old
+lady slep in that very room, and was laid up weeks! "Curus," says I,
+when I come to 'ear of it, "_very_ curus!" and it set me a-thinkin'.
+Last time but one--'ere, lemme see--that was a bell-'anging job, I
+_think_--no, I'm wrong, it was drains agen, so it were--drains it was
+agen. And the _next_ thing I 'eard was that Mrs. Rummles was a-layin' at
+death's door with the diffthery! The last time--ah, I recklect well, I
+was called in to see if somethink wasn't wrong with the ballcock in the
+top cistin. I see there _was_ somethink, and I come away as usual. That
+day week, old Mr. Rummles was took with a fit on the floor in the back
+droring-room, which broke up the 'ouse!
+
+'Now, I think, as fair-minded and unprejudiced parties, you'll agree
+with me that there was something more'n hordinary coinside-ency in all
+that. I declare to you!' avowed the plumber, with a gloomy relish and a
+candour that was possibly begotten of beer, 'I declare to you there's
+times when I do honestly believe as I carry a curse along with me
+whenever I visits this 'ere partickler 'ouse! and, though it's agen my
+own hinterests, I deem it on'y my dooty, as a honest man, to mention
+it!'
+
+Under any other circumstances, the plumber's compliments on her taste
+and his lugubrious assumption of character of the Destroying Angel would
+have sorely tried, if not completely upset, Ella's gravity; as it was,
+she was too wretched to have more than a passing and quite
+unappreciative sense of his absurdity. George, having the quality of
+mind which makes jokes more readily than sees them, took him quite
+seriously.
+
+'Well,' he answered solemnly, 'I hope you won't bring _us_ bad luck, at
+all events!'
+
+'_I_ 'ope so, sir, I'm sure. I _'ope_ so. It will not be by any desire
+on my part, more partickler when you're just settin' up 'ousekeepin'
+with your good lady 'ere. But there's no tellin' in these matters.
+That's where it is, you see--there's no tellin'. And, arter all my
+experence, with the best intentions in the world, I can't go and
+guarantee to you as nothink won't come of it. I wish I could, but, as a
+honest man, I can't. If it's to be,' moralised this fatalistic plumber,
+'it _is_ to be, and that's all about it, and no hefforts on my part or
+yours won't make hany difference, will they, sir?'
+
+'Well, well,' said George, plainly ill at ease, 'that will do, my
+friend. Now, Ella, what do you say--shall we go upstairs?'
+
+'Not now,' she gasped, 'let us go away--. Oh, George, take me outside,
+please!'
+
+'Dash that confounded fool of a plumber!' said George, irritably, when
+they were in the street again; 'wonder if he thinks I'm going to employ
+him after that! Not that it isn't all bosh, of course---- Why, Ella,
+you're not tired, are you?'
+
+'I--I think I am a little--do you mind if we drive home?'
+
+Ella was very silent during their short drive. When they reached Linden
+Gardens she said, 'I think we must say good-bye here, George. I feel as
+if I were going to have a headache.'
+
+'You poor little girl!' he said, looking rather crestfallen, for he had
+been counting upon going in and being invited to remain for dinner,
+'it's been rather too much for you, going over the house and all
+that--or was it that beastly plumber with his rigmaroles?'
+
+'It wasn't the plumber,' she said hurriedly, as the door was opened,
+'and--good-bye, George.'
+
+'How easily girls do get knocked up!' thought George, as he walked
+homeward, 'a little pleasant excitement like this and she seems quite
+upset. She was delighted with the house, though, that's one blessing,
+and I mustn't forget to tell the girls how touched she was by their
+presents. What a darling she is, and how happy we shall be together!'
+
+
+
+
+PART II
+
+
+Once safely at home, Ella hastened upstairs to her own room, where, if
+the truth must be told, she employed the half-hour before dinner in
+unintermittent sobbing, into which temper largely entered. 'He has
+spoilt it all for me! How _could_ he--oh, how could he?' ran the burden
+of her moan. At the dinner-table, though pale and silent, she had
+recovered composure.
+
+'A pleasant walk, Ella?' inquired her mother, with rather formal
+interest.
+
+'Yes, very,' replied Ella, trusting she would not be questioned further.
+
+'I believe I know where you went!' cried indiscreet Flossie. 'You went
+to look at your new home--now, _didn't_ you? Ah, I thought so! I
+suppose you have quite made up your minds how you mean to do the rooms?'
+
+'Quite.'
+
+'We might go round to all the best places to-morrow,' said Mrs. Hylton,
+'and see some papers and hangings--there were some lovely patterns in
+Blank's windows the other day.'
+
+'And, Ella,' added Flossie, 'I've been out with Andrews after school
+several times, to Tottenham Court Road, and Wardour Street, and Oxford
+Street--oh, everywhere, hunting up old furniture, and I can show you
+where they have some beautiful things--not shams, but really good!'
+
+'You know, Ella,' said Mrs. Hylton, observing that she did not answer,
+'I want you to have a pretty house, and you and George must order
+exactly what you like; but I think you will find I may be some help to
+you in choosing.'
+
+'Thank you, mother,' said Ella, without any animation; 'I--I don't think
+we shall want much.'
+
+'You will want all that young people in your position do want, I
+suppose,' said Mrs. Hylton, a little impatiently; 'and of course you
+understand that the bills are to be my affair.'
+
+'Thank you, mother,' murmured Ella again. She didn't feel able to tell
+them just yet how this had all been forestalled; she felt that she would
+infallibly break down if she tried.
+
+'You seem a little overdone to-night, my dear,' said her mother
+frigidly; she was naturally hurt at the very uneffusive way in which her
+good offices had been met.
+
+'I have such a dreadful headache,' pleaded Ella. 'I--I think I overtired
+myself this afternoon.'
+
+'Then you were very foolish, after travelling all yesterday, as you did.
+I don't wonder that George was ashamed to come in. You had better go to
+bed early, and I will send Andrews in to you with some of my sleeping
+mixture.'
+
+Ella was glad enough to obey, though the draught took some time to
+operate; she felt as if no happiness or peace of mind were possible for
+her till George had been persuaded to undo his work.
+
+Surely he could not refuse when he knew that her mother was prepared to
+do everything for them at her own expense!
+
+And here it began to dawn upon her what this would entail! George's
+words came back to her as if she heard them actually spoken. Did he not
+say that the house had been furnished out of his savings?
+
+What was she asking him to do? To dismantle it entirely; to humiliate
+himself by going round to all the people he had dealt with, asking them
+as a favour to take back their goods, or else he must sell them as best
+he could for a fraction of their cost. Who was to refund him all he had
+so uselessly spent? Could she ask her mother to do so? Would he even
+consent to such an arrangement if it was proposed?
+
+Then his sisters--how could she avoid offending them irreparably,
+perhaps involving George in a quarrel with his family, if she were to
+carry her point?
+
+As she realised, for the first time, the inevitable consequences of
+success, she asked herself in despair what she ought to do--where her
+plain duty lay?
+
+Did she love George--or was it all delusion, and was he less to her than
+mere superfluities, the fringe of life?
+
+She did love him, in spite of any passing disloyalty of thought. She
+felt his sterling worth and goodness, even his weaknesses had something
+lovable in them for her.
+
+And he had been planning, spending, working all this time to give her
+pleasure, and this was his reward! She had been within an ace of letting
+him see the cruel ingratitude that was in her heart! 'What a selfish
+wretch I have been!' she thought; 'but I won't be--no, I won't! George
+shall _not_ be snubbed, hurt, estranged from his family on my account!'
+
+No, she would suffer--she alone--and in silence. Never by a word would
+she betray to him the pain his well-intentioned action cost her. Not
+even to her mother and Flossie would she permit herself to utter the
+least complaint, lest they should insist upon opening George's eyes!
+
+So, having arrived at this heroic resolve, in which she found a touch of
+the sublime that almost consoled her, the tears dried on her cheeks and
+Ella fell asleep at last.
+
+Some readers, no doubt--though possibly few of our heroine's sex--will
+smile scornfully at this crumpled rose-leaf agony, this tempest in a
+Dresden teacup; and the writer is not concerned to deny that the
+situation has its ludicrous side.
+
+But, for a girl brought up as Ella Hylton had been, in an artistic
+_milieu_, her eye insensibly trained to love all that was beautiful in
+colour and form, to be almost morbidly sensitive to ugliness and
+vulgarity--it was a very real and bitter struggle, a hard-won victory to
+come to such a decision as she formed. Life, Heaven knows, contains
+worse trials and deeper tragedies than this; but at least Ella's happy
+life had as yet known no harder.
+
+And, so far, she must be given the credit of having conquered.
+
+Resolution is, no doubt, half the battle. Unfortunately, Ella's
+resolution, though she hardly perceived this at present, could not be
+effected by one isolated and final act, but by a long chain of daily and
+hourly forbearances, the first break in which would undo all that had
+gone before.
+
+How she bore the test we are going to see.
+
+She woke the next morning to a sense that her life had somehow lost its
+savour; the exaltation of her resolve overnight had gone off and left
+her spirits flat and dead; but she came down, nevertheless, determined
+to be staunch and true to George under all provocations.
+
+'Have you and George decided when you would like your wedding to be?'
+asked her mother, after breakfast, 'because we ought to have the
+invitations printed very soon.'
+
+'Not yet,' faltered Ella, and the words might have passed either as an
+answer or an appeal.
+
+'I think it should be some time before the end of next month, or people
+will be going out of town.'
+
+'I suppose so,' was the reply, so listlessly given that Mrs. Hylton
+glanced keenly at her daughter.
+
+'What do you feel about it yourself, Ella?'
+
+'I? oh, I--I've no feeling. Perhaps, if we waited--no, it doesn't
+matter--let it be when you and George wish, mother, please!'
+
+Mrs. Hylton gave a sharp, annoyed little laugh: 'Really, my dear, if you
+can't get up any more interest in it than that, I think it would
+certainly be wiser to wait!'
+
+It was more than indifference that Ella felt--a wild aversion to
+beginning the new life that but lately had seemed so mysteriously sweet
+and strange; she was frightened by it, ashamed of it, but she could not
+help herself. She made no answer, nor did Mrs. Hylton again refer to the
+subject.
+
+But Ella's worst tribulations had yet to come. That afternoon, as she
+and her mother and Flossie were sitting in the drawing-room, 'Mrs. and
+the Miss Chapmans' were announced. Evidently they had deemed it
+incumbent on them to pay a state visit as soon as possible after Ella's
+return.
+
+Ella returned their effusive greetings as dutifully as she could. She
+had never succeeded in cultivating a very lively affection for them;
+to-day she found them barely endurable.
+
+Mrs. Chapman was a stout, dewlapped old lady, with dull eyes and
+pachydermatous folds in her face. She had a husky voice and a funereal
+manner. Jessie, her eldest daughter, was not altogether uncomely in a
+commonplace way: she was dark-haired, high-coloured,
+loud-voiced--generally sprightly and voluble and overpowering; she was
+in such a hurry to speak that her words tripped one another up, and she
+had a meaningless and, to Ella, highly irritating little laugh.
+
+Carrie was plain and colourless, content to admire and echo her sister.
+
+After some conversation on Ella's Continental experiences, Jessie
+suddenly, as Ella's uneasy instinct foresaw, turned to Mrs. Hylton. 'Of
+course, Ella told you what a surprise she had at Campden Hill yesterday?
+Weren't you electrified?'
+
+'No doubt I should have been,' said Mrs. Hylton, who detested Jessie,
+'only Ella did not think fit to mention it.'
+
+'Oh, I wonder at that! I hope I wasn't going to betray the secrets of
+the prison-house?' Jessie was fond of using stock phrases to give
+lightness and sparkle to her conversation. 'Ella, the idea of your
+keeping it all to yourself, you sly puss! But tell me--would you ever
+have believed Tumps'--his sisters called George 'Tumps'--'could be
+capable of such independent behaviour?'
+
+'No,' said Ella, 'I--indeed I never should!'
+
+'Ha, ha! nor should we! You would have screamed to see him fussing
+about--wasn't he killing over it, Carrie?'
+
+'Oh, he was, Jessie!'
+
+'My son,' explained Mrs. Chapman to Mrs. Hylton, 'is so wonderfully
+energetic and practical. I have never known him fail to carry through
+anything he has once undertaken--he inherits that from his poor dear
+father.'
+
+'I don't quite gather what your brother George has been doing, even
+now?' said Mrs. Hylton to Jessie.
+
+'Oh, but my lips are sealed. Wild horses sha'n't drag any more from me!
+Don't be afraid, Ella, I won't spoil sport!'
+
+'There is no sport to spoil,' said Ella. 'Mother, it is only that--that
+George has furnished the house while I have been away.'
+
+'Really?' said Mrs. Hylton politely; 'that _is_ energetic of him,
+indeed!'
+
+'Poor dear Tumps came home so proud of your approval,' said Jessie to
+Ella, 'and we were awfully relieved to find you didn't think we'd made
+the house quite too dreadful--weren't we, Carrie?'
+
+'Yes, indeed, Jessie.'
+
+'Of course,' observed the latter young lady, 'it's always so hard to hit
+upon another person's taste exactly--especially in furnishing.'
+
+'Impossible, I should have thought,' from Mrs. Hylton.
+
+'I hope Ella is of a different opinion--what do _you_ say, dearest?'
+
+'Oh,' cried Ella hastily, with splendid mendacity, 'I--I liked it all
+very much, and--and it was so much too kind of you and Carrie. I've
+never thanked you for--for all the things you gave me!'
+
+'Oh, _those_! they ain't worth thanking for--just a few little artistic
+odds and ends. They set off a room, you know--give it a finish.'
+
+'Young people nowadays,' croaked old Mrs. Chapman lugubriously in Mrs.
+Hylton's courteously inclined ear, 'think so much of luxury and
+ornament. I'm sure when I married my dear husband, we----'
+
+'Now, mater dear, you really _mustn't_!' interrupted the irrepressible
+Jessie; 'Mrs. Hylton is on _our_ side, you know. She likes pretty things
+about her--don't you, Mrs. Hylton? And, talking of that, Ella, I hope
+you thought our glyco-vitrine decoration a success? We were perfectly
+surprised ourselves to see how well it came out! Just transparent
+coloured paper, Mrs. Hylton, and you cut it into sheets, and gum it on
+the window-panes, and really, unless you were told or came quite close,
+you would declare it was real stained glass! You ought to try some of it
+on your windows, Mrs. Hylton. I'll tell you where you can get it--you go
+down----'
+
+'I'm afraid I'm old-fashioned, my dear,' said Mrs. Hylton, stiffly; 'if
+I cannot have the reality, I prefer to do without even the best
+imitations.'
+
+'Why, you're deserting us, I declare! Ella, you must take her to see the
+window, and then perhaps she will change her opinion.'
+
+'I always tell my girls,' said Mrs. Chapman, in her woolly voice, 'when
+I am dead and gone they can make any alterations they please, but while
+I am spared to them I like everything about the house to be kept exactly
+as it was in their poor father's lifetime.'
+
+'_Isn't_ she a dear conservative old mummy?' said Jessie to Ella in an
+audible aside. 'Why, I do believe she won't see anything to admire in
+your little house--at least, if she does, the dear old lady, she'd
+sooner die than admit it!'
+
+The Chapmans went at last, and before they were out of the house Mrs.
+Hylton, with an effort to seem unconcerned, said: 'And so, Ella, you and
+George have done without my help? Of course you know your own affairs
+best; still, I should have thought--I should certainly have
+thought--that I might have been of some assistance to you--if only in
+pecuniary matters.'
+
+'George preferred that you should not be troubled,' stammered Ella.
+
+'I am not blaming him. I respect him for wishing to be independent. I
+own to being a little surprised that you should not have told me of this
+before, though, Ella. But for that chattering girl, I presume I should
+have been left to discover it for myself. I wonder you cannot bring
+yourself to be a little more open with your mother, my dear.'
+
+'Oh, mother!' cried Ella in despair, 'indeed I was going to tell
+you--only, I did not know myself till yesterday. At least, that is----'
+she broke off lamely, fearing to reflect on George.
+
+'I find it hard to believe that George would act without consulting you
+in any way. It is strange enough that he should have undertaken to
+furnish the house in your absence.'
+
+'But if I couldn't be there!' pleaded Ella--'and I couldn't.'
+
+'Naturally, as you were on the Continent, you couldn't be on Campden
+Hill at the same time; you need not be absurd, Ella. But what I want to
+know is this--have you had a voice in the matter, or have you not?'
+
+'N--not much,' confessed Ella, hanging her head.
+
+'So I suspected, and I think George ought to be ashamed of himself. I
+never heard of such a thing, and I shall make a point of seeing the
+house and satisfying myself that it is fit for a daughter of mine to
+inhabit.'
+
+'Mother!' exclaimed Ella, springing up excitedly, 'you don't understand.
+Why should you choose to suppose that the house is not pretty? It is not
+done as _you_ would do it, because poor George hadn't much money to
+spend; but if I am satisfied, why should you come between us? And I _am_
+satisfied--quite, quite satisfied; he has done it all beautifully, and I
+will not have a single thing altered! After all, it is _his_ house--our
+house--and nobody else has any right to interfere--not even you,
+mother!'
+
+Mrs. Hylton shrugged her shoulders. 'Oh, my dear, if that is the way you
+think proper to speak to me, it is time to change the subject. Pray
+understand that I shall not dream of interfering. I am very glad that
+you are so satisfied.' And by-and-by she left the room majestically.
+
+When she had gone, Flossie, who had been listening open-eyed to all that
+had taken place, came and stood in front of Ella's chair.
+
+'Ella, tell me,' she said, 'has George really furnished the house
+exactly as you like--_really_ now?'
+
+'Haven't I said so, Flossie? Why should you doubt it?'
+
+'Oh, I don't know; I was wondering, that was all!'
+
+'Really!' cried Ella angrily, 'anyone would think poor George was a sort
+of barbarian, who couldn't be expected to know anything, or trusted to
+do anything!'
+
+'I'm sure I never _said_ so, Ella. But how clever of him to choose just
+the right things! And, Ella, do all the colours and things go well
+together? I always thought most men didn't notice much about all that.
+And are the new mantelpieces pretty? Oh, and where did he go for the
+papers and the carpets?'
+
+'Flossie, I wish you wouldn't tease so. Can't you see I have a headache?
+I can't answer so many questions, and I won't! Once for all, everything
+is just what I like. Do you understand, or shall I tell you
+again?--just, _just_ what I like!'
+
+'Oh, all right,' returned Flossie, with exasperating good-humour; 'then
+there's nothing to lose your temper about, darling, is there?'
+
+And this was all that Ella had gained by her loyalty to George so far.
+
+It was the morning after the Chapmans' visit. Ella had seen her mother
+and Flossie preparing to go out, but, owing to the friction between
+them, they neither invited her to accompany them, nor did she venture to
+ask where they were going. At luncheon, however, the unhappy girl
+divined from the expression of their faces how they had employed the
+forenoon. They had been inspecting the Campden Hill house! Her mother's
+handsome face wore a look of frozen contempt. Imagine a strict Quaker's
+feelings on seeing his son with a pair of black eyes--a Socialist's at
+finding a peerage under his daughter's pillow--a Positivist's whose
+children have all joined the Salvation Army, and even then but a faint
+idea will be reached of Mrs. Hylton's utter dismay and disgust.
+
+Flossie, though angry, took a different view of Ella's share in the
+business; she knew her better than her mother did, and consequently
+refused to believe that she was a Philistine at heart. It was her absurd
+infatuation for George that made her see with his eyes and bow down
+before the hideous household gods he had chosen to erect. On such
+weakness Flossie had no mercy.
+
+'Well, Ella, dear,' she began, 'mother and I have seen your house.
+George has quite surpassed our wildest expectations. Accept my
+compliments!'
+
+'Flossie,' said her mother severely, 'will you kindly choose some other
+topic? I really feel too seriously annoyed about all this to bear to
+hear it spoken of just yet. I think you shall come with me to the
+Amberleys' garden-party this afternoon, and not Ella, as we are dining
+out this evening. You had better stay at home and rest, Ella.'
+
+In this, and countless other ways, was Ella made to feel that she was in
+disgrace.
+
+Nor did Flossie spare her sister when they were alone. 'Poor dear
+mother!' she said, 'I quite thought that house would have broken her
+heart--oh, I'm not saying a word against it, Ella, I know _you_ like it,
+and I'm sure it looks very comfortable--everything so sensible and
+useful, and the kitchen really charming; mother and I liked it best of
+all the rooms. Such a horrid man let us in; he was at work there, and he
+would follow us all about, and tell mother his entire history. I don't
+think he _could_ have been quite sober, he would insist on turning all
+the taps on everywhere. I suppose, Ella, it's ever so much _cheaper_ to
+furnish as you and George have done; that's the worst of pretty things,
+they do cost such a lot! I'd no idea you were so practical, though,' and
+so on.
+
+On Sunday George came to luncheon. He was delighted to hear from Flossie
+that they had been to the house, and gave a boisterously high-spirited
+account of his labours. 'It _was_ a grind,' he informed them, 'and, as
+for those painter-fellows, I began to think they'd stay out the entire
+lease.'
+
+'Art is long, George,' observed Flossie, wickedly.
+
+'Oh yes, I know; but they promised faithfully to be out in ten days, and
+they were over three weeks!'
+
+'But look at the result! George, how _did_ you find out that Ella liked
+grained doors?'
+
+'Well, to tell you the truth, Flossie, that was a bit of a fluke. The
+man told me that graining was coming in again, and I said, "Grain 'em,
+then"--_I_ didn't know!'
+
+In short, he was more provokingly dense than ever to-day, and Ella found
+herself growing more and more captious and irritable that afternoon; he
+could not understand why she was so disinclined to talk; even the dear
+little house of which she was so soon to be the mistress failed to
+interest her.
+
+'You have told me twice already that you got the drawing-room carpet a
+great bargain, and only paid four pounds ten for the table in the
+dining-room,' she broke out. 'Can't we take that for granted in future?'
+
+'I forgot I'd told you; I thought it was the mater,' he said; 'and I
+say, Ella, how about pictures? Jessie's promised to do us some
+water-colours--she's been taking lessons lately, you know--but we shall
+want one or two prints for the dining-room, shan't we? You can pick them
+up second-hand very cheap.'
+
+'Oh yes, yes; anything you please, George!... No, no; I'm not cross, I'm
+only tired, especially of talking about the house. It is quite finished,
+you know, so what _is_ there to discuss?'
+
+During the days that followed, Flossie devised an ingenious method of
+tormenting Ella; she laid out her pocket-money, of which she had a good
+deal, on the most preposterous ornaments--a pair of dangling cut-glass
+lustres, bead mats, a trophy of wax fruit under a glass shade, gaudy
+fire-screens and flowerpots, all of which she solemnly presented to her
+suffering sister. This was not pure mischief or unkindness on Flossie's
+side, but part of a treatment she had hit upon for curing Ella of her
+folly. And at last the worm turned. Flossie came in one day with a cheap
+plush and terra-cotta panel of appalling ugliness.
+
+'For the drawing-room, dear,' she observed blandly, and Ella suddenly
+burst into a flood of tears.
+
+'You are very, very unkind to me, Flossie!' she sobbed.
+
+'I!' exclaimed Flossie, in a tone of the most innocent surprise. 'Why,
+Ella, I thought you would be charmed with it. I'm sure _George_ will.
+And, you know, it will go beautifully with the rest of your things!'
+
+'You might understand ... you might see----'
+
+'I might see what?'
+
+'How _frightfully_ miserable I am!' said Ella, which was the very
+admission Miss Flossie had been seeking to provoke.
+
+'Suppose I _do_ see,' she said; 'suppose I've been trying to get you to
+act sensibly, Ella?'
+
+'Then it's cruel of you!'
+
+'No it's not. It's kind. How am I to help you unless you speak out? I'm
+younger than you, Ella, but I know this--_I_ would never mope and make
+myself miserable when a word would put everything right!'
+
+'But it wouldn't, Flossie; it is too late to speak now. I can't tell
+him how I really feel--I can't!'
+
+'Ah, then you own there is something to tell?'
+
+'What have I said? Flossie, forget what I said; it slipped out. I meant
+nothing.'
+
+'And you are perfectly happy and satisfied, are you? _Now_, I know how
+people look when they are perfectly happy and satisfied.'
+
+'It's no use!' cried Ella, suddenly. 'I've tried, and tried, and tried
+to bear it, but I can't. I _must_ tell somebody ... it is making me ill.
+I am getting cross and wicked, and unlike what I used to be. Flossie, I
+can't go and live there--I dread the thought of it; I shrink from it
+more and more every day! It is all odious, impossible--and yet I must, I
+must!'
+
+'No, you mustn't; and, what's more, you shan't!'
+
+'Flossie, you mean you will tell mother! You must not, do you hear? If
+you do, it will only make matters worse. Oh, why did I tell you?' cried
+Ella, in shame at this lapse from all her heroism. 'Promise me you will
+say nothing to mother--it is too late now--promise!'
+
+'Very well,' said Flossie reluctantly; 'then I promise. But, all the
+same, Ella, I think you're a great goose!'
+
+'I didn't promise I wouldn't say anything to _George_, though,' she
+reflected; and so, on the very next occasion that she caught him alone,
+she availed herself of an innocent allusion of his to Ella's low
+spirits to give him the benefit of her candid opinion, which was not
+tempered by any marked consideration for his feelings.
+
+Ella was in the morning-room alone--she had taken to sitting alone
+lately, brooding over her trials. She was no heroine, after all; her
+mind, it is to be feared, was far from superior. She was finding out
+that she had undertaken too heavy a task; she could not console herself
+for her lost dream of a charmingly appointed house. She might endure to
+live in such a home as George had made for her; but to be expected to
+admire it, to let it be understood that it was her handiwork, that she
+had chosen or approved of it--this was the burden that was crushing her.
+
+Suddenly the door opened and George stood before her. His expression was
+so altered that she scarcely recognised him; all the cheery buoyancy had
+vanished, and his stern, set face had a dignity and character in it now
+that were wanting before.
+
+'I have just had a talk with Flossie,' he began; 'she has shown me what
+a--what a mistake I've been making.'
+
+Ella could not help feeling a certain relief, though she said, 'It was
+very wrong of Flossie--she had no right to speak.'
+
+'She had every right,' he said. 'She might have done it more kindly,
+perhaps, but that's nothing. Why didn't you tell me yourself, Ella? You
+might have trusted me!'
+
+'I couldn't--it seemed so cruel, so ungrateful, after all you had done.
+I hoped you would never know.'
+
+'It's well for you, and for me too, that I know this while there's still
+time. Ella, I've been a blind, blundering fool. I never had a suspicion
+of this till--till just now, or you don't think I should have gone on
+with it a single minute. I came to tell you that you need not make
+yourself miserable any longer. I will put an end to this--whatever it
+costs me.'
+
+'Oh, George, I am so ashamed. I know it is weak and cowardly of me, but
+I can't help it. And--and will it cost you so very much?'
+
+'Quite as much as I can bear.'
+
+'No; but tell me--about _how_ much? More than a hundred pounds?'
+
+'I haven't worked it out in pounds, shillings, and pence,' he said
+grimly; 'but I should put it higher myself.'
+
+'Won't they take back some of the things? They ought to,' she suggested
+timidly.
+
+'The things? Oh, the furniture! Good Heavens, Ella! do you suppose I
+care a straw about that? All I can think of is how I could have gone on
+deceiving myself like this, believing I knew your every thought; and all
+the time--pah, what a fool I've been!'
+
+'I thought I should get used to it,' she pleaded. 'And oh, you don't
+know how hard I have tried to bear it, not to let anyone see what I
+felt--you don't know!'
+
+'And I would rather not know,' he replied, 'for it's not exactly
+flattering, you see, Ella. And at all events, it's over now. This is the
+last time I shall trouble you; you will see no more of me after to-day.'
+
+Ella could only stare at him incredulously. Had he really taken the
+matter so seriously to heart as this? Could he not forgive the wound to
+his vanity? How hard, how utterly unworthy of him!
+
+'Yes,' he continued, 'I see now we were quite unsuited to one another. I
+should never have made you happy, Ella; it's best to find it out before
+it's too late. So let us shake hands and say good-bye, my dear.'
+
+She felt powerless to appeal to him, and yet it was not wholly pride
+that tied her tongue; she was too shaken and stunned to make the least
+effort at remonstrance.
+
+'Then, if it must be,' she said at last, very low--'good-bye, George.'
+
+He crushed her hand in his strong grasp. 'Don't mind about me,' he said
+roughly. 'You've nothing to blame yourself for. I daresay I shall get
+over it all right. It's rather sudden at first--that's all!' And with
+that he was gone.
+
+Flossie, coming in a little later, found her sister sitting by the
+window, smiling in a strange, vacant way. '_Well?_' said Flossie
+eagerly, for she had been anxiously waiting to hear the result of the
+interview.
+
+'It's all over, Flossie; he has broken it off.'
+
+'Oh, Ella, I'm so glad! I _hoped_ he would, but I wasn't sure. Well,
+you may thank me for delivering you, darling. If I hadn't spoken
+plainly----'
+
+'Tell me what you said.'
+
+'Oh, let me see. Well, I told him anybody else would have seen long ago
+that your feelings were altered. I said you were perfectly miserable at
+having to marry him, only you thought it was too late to say so. I told
+him he didn't understand you in the least, and you hadn't a single
+thought or taste in common. I said if he cared about you at all, the
+best way he could prove it was by setting you free, and not spoiling
+your life and his own too. I put it as pleasantly as I could,' said
+Flossie naively, 'but he is very trying!'
+
+'You told him all that! What made you invent such wicked, cruel lies?
+Flossie, it is you that have spoilt our lives, and I will never forgive
+you--never, as long as I live!'
+
+'Ella!' cried the younger sister, utterly astonished at this outburst.
+'Why, didn't you tell me the other day how miserable you were, and how
+you dared not speak about it? And now, when I----'
+
+'Go away, Flossie; you have done mischief enough!'
+
+'Oh, very well, I'm going--if this is all I get for helping you. Is it
+_my_ fault if you don't know your own mind, and say what you don't mean?
+And if you really want your dearly beloved George back again, there's
+time yet; he hasn't gone--he's in the drawing-room with mother.'
+
+How infinitely petty her past misery seemed now! for what trifles she
+had thrown away George's honest heart! If only there was a chance still!
+at least false pride should not come between them any longer: so thought
+Ella on her way to the drawing-room. George was still there; as she
+turned the door-handle she heard her mother's clear resonant tones. 'Not
+that that is any excuse for Ella,' she was saying.
+
+Ella burst precipitately into the room. She was only just in time, for
+George had risen and was evidently on the point of leaving. 'George,'
+she exclaimed, panting after her rapid flight, 'I--I came to tell
+you----'
+
+'My dear Ella,' interrupted Mrs. Hylton, 'the kindest thing you can do
+for George now is to let him go without any more explanations.'
+
+Ella stopped; again her mind became a blank. What had she come for; what
+was it she felt she must say? While she hesitated, George was already at
+the other door; he seemed anxious to avoid hearing her; in another
+second he would be gone.
+
+She cried to him piteously. 'George, dear George, don't leave me!... I
+can't bear it!'
+
+'This is too ridiculous!' exclaimed her mother angrily. 'What is it that
+you _do_ want, Ella?'
+
+'I want George,' she said simply. 'It was all a mistake, George. Flossie
+mistook---- Oh, you don't really think that I have left off caring for
+you? I haven't, dear, indeed I haven't--won't you believe me?'
+
+'I had better leave you to come to an understanding together,' said Mrs.
+Hylton, not in the best of tempers, for she had been more sorry for
+George than for the rupture he came to announce, and she swept out of
+the room with very perceptible annoyance.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+'I thought it was all up with me, Ella; I did indeed,' said George, a
+minute or two later, his face still pale after all this emotion. 'But
+tell me--what's wrong with the furniture I ordered?'
+
+'Nothing, dear, nothing,' she answered, blushing. 'Don't think about it
+any more.'
+
+'No? But your mother was talking about it too,' he insisted. 'Come,
+Ella, dear, for heaven's sake let us have no more misunderstandings! I
+see now what an ass I was not to wait and let you choose for yourself;
+these aesthetic things are not in my line. But I'd no idea you'd care so
+much!'
+
+'But I don't now--a bit.'
+
+'Well, I do, then. And the house must be done all over again, and
+exactly as you would like it; so there's no more to be said about it,'
+said George, without a trace of pique or wounded vanity.
+
+'George, you are too good to me; I don't deserve it. And indeed you must
+not--think of the expense!'
+
+His face lengthened slightly; he knew well enough that the change would
+cost him dear.
+
+'I'll manage it somehow,' he declared stoutly.
+
+Would her mother help them now? thought Ella, and felt more than
+doubtful. No, in spite of her own wishes, she must not allow George to
+carry out his intentions.
+
+'But you forget Carrie and Jessie,' she said; 'we shall hurt their
+feelings so if we change now.'
+
+'By Jove! I forgot that,' he said. 'Yes, they won't like it--they meant
+well, poor girls, and took a lot of trouble. Still, you're the first
+person to be considered, Ella. I'll try and smooth it over with them,
+and if they choose to be offended, why, they must--that's all. And I
+tell you what. Suppose we go and see the house now, and you shall tell
+me just what wants doing to make it right?'
+
+She would have liked to decline this rather invidious office, especially
+as she felt no compromise to be possible; but he was so urgent that she
+finally agreed to go with him.
+
+As they gained Campden Hill and the road in which their house stood,
+George stopped. 'Hullo!' he said, 'that can't be the house--what's the
+matter with it?'
+
+Very soon it was pretty evident what had been the matter--the walls were
+scorched and streaming, the window sashes were empty, charred and wasted
+by fire, the door was blistered and blackened, a stalwart fireman in
+his undress cap, with his helmet slung at his back, was just opening the
+gate as they came up.
+
+'Can't come in, sir,' he said, civilly enough. 'No one admitted.'
+
+'Hang it!' exclaimed George, 'it's my own fire--I'm the tenant.'
+
+'Oh, I beg your pardon, sir--it's been got under some hours now. I was
+just going off duty.'
+
+'Much damage done?' inquired George laconically.
+
+'Well, you see, sir,' said the man, evidently considering how to prepare
+George for the worst, 'we didn't get the call till the house was well
+alight, and there was three steamers and a manual a-playing on it,
+so--well, you must expect things to be a bit untidy-like inside. But the
+walls and the roof ain't much damaged.'
+
+'And how did it happen?--the house isn't even occupied.'
+
+'Workmen,' said the man. 'Someone was in there early this morning and
+left the gas escaping somewheres, and as likely as not a light burning
+near--and here you are. Well, I'll be off, sir; there's nothing more to
+be done 'ere. Good-day, sir, and thank ye, I'm sure.'
+
+'Oh, George!' said Ella, half crying, 'our poor, poor little house! It
+seems like a judgment on me. How _can_ you laugh! Who will build it up
+for us now?'
+
+'Who? Why, the insurance people, to be sure! You see, the firm are
+agents for the "Curfew," and as soon as I got all the furniture in I
+insured the whole concern and got a protection note, so we're all right.
+Don't worry, little girl. Why, don't you see this gets us out of our
+difficulty? We can start afresh now without offending anybody. Look
+there; there's that idiot of a plumber who's done all the mischief--a
+nice funk he'll be in when he sees us!'
+
+But Mr. Peagrum was quite unperturbed; if anything, his smudgy features
+wore a look of sombre complacency as he came towards them. 'I'm sorry
+this should have occurred,' he said,'but you'll bear me out that I
+warned yer as something was bound to 'appen. In course I couldn't tell
+what form it might take, and fire I must say I did _not_ expect. I
+'adn't on'y been in the place not a quarter of a hour, watering the
+gaselier in the libery--the libery as _was_, I _should_ say--when it
+struck me I'd forgot my screw-driver, so, fortunately, as things turned
+out, I went 'ome to my place to get it, and I come back to see the place
+all in a blaze. It's fate, that's what it is--fate's at the bottom o'
+this 'ere job!'
+
+'Much more likely to be a lighted candle,' said George.
+
+'I was not on the premises at the time, so I can't say; but, be that 'ow
+it may, there's no denying it's a singler thing the way my words have
+been fulfilled almost literal.'
+
+'Confound you!' said George. 'You take good care your prophecies come
+off. Why, man, you're not going to pretend you don't know that it's your
+own carelessness that's brought this about! This isn't the only house
+you've brought bad luck into, Mr. What's-your-name, since you've started
+in business!'
+
+'You can't make me lose my temper,' replied the plumber with dignity. 'I
+put it down to ignirance.'
+
+'So do I,' said George. 'And if I know anyone who's anxious for a little
+typhoid, or wants his house burnt down at a moderate charge, why, I
+shall know whom to recommend. Good-day.'
+
+He turned on his heel and walked off, but Ella lingered behind. 'I only
+just wanted to tell you,' she said, addressing the astonished plumber,
+'that you have done us a very great service, and I, at least, am very
+much obliged to you.' And she fluttered away after her _fiance_.
+
+The plumber--that instrument of Destiny--looked after the retreating
+couple, and indulged in a mystified whistle.
+
+'_'E_ comes a bullyragging of me,' he observed to a lamp-post, 'and
+she's "very much obliged"! And I'm blowed if I know what for, either
+way! Cracked, poor young things, cracked, the pair on 'em--and no
+wonder, with such a calamity so recent. Ah, well, I do 'ope as this is
+the end on it. I 'ope I shan't be the means of bringing no more trouble
+into that little 'ouse--that I kin truly say!'
+
+And--human gratitude having its limits--it is highly probable that this
+pious aspiration will not be disappointed, so long, at least, as Mr. and
+Mrs. Chapman's tenancy continues.
+
+
+
+
+_DON; THE STORY OF A GREEDY DOG_
+
+A TALE FOR CHILDREN
+
+
+'Daisy, dearest,' said Miss Millikin anxiously to her niece one
+afternoon, 'do you think poor Don is quite the thing? He has seemed so
+very languid these last few days, and he is certainly losing his
+figure!'
+
+Daisy was absorbed in a rather ambitious attempt to sketch the lake from
+the open windows of Applethwaite Cottage, and did not look up from her
+drawing immediately. When she did speak her reply might perhaps have
+been more sympathetic. 'He _eats_ such a lot, auntie!' she said. 'Yes,
+Don, we _are_ talking about you. You know you eat too much, and that's
+the reason you're so disgracefully fat!'
+
+Don, who was lying on a rug under the verandah, wagged his tail with an
+uneasy protest, as if he disapproved (as indeed he did) of the very
+personal turn Daisy had given to the conversation. He had noticed
+himself that he was not as active as he used to be; he grew tired so
+very soon now when he chased birds (he was always possessed by a fixed
+idea that, if he only gave his whole mind to it, he could catch any
+swallow that flew at all fairly); he felt the heat considerably.
+
+Still, it was Don's opinion that, so long as he did not mind being fat
+himself, it was no business of any other person's--certainly not of
+Daisy's.
+
+'But, Daisy,' cried Miss Millikin plaintively, 'you don't really mean
+that I overfeed him?'
+
+'Well,' Daisy admitted, 'I think you give way to him rather, Aunt Sophy,
+I really do. I know that at home we never let Fop have anything between
+his meals. Jack says that unless a small dog is kept on very simple diet
+he'll soon get fat, and getting fat,' added Daisy portentously, 'means
+having fits sooner or later.'
+
+'Oh, my _dear_!' exclaimed her aunt, now seriously alarmed. 'What do you
+think I ought to do about it?'
+
+'I know what I would do if he was _my_ dog,' said Daisy, with great
+decision--'diet him, and take no notice when he begs at table; I would.
+I'd begin this very afternoon.'
+
+'_After_ tea, Daisy?' stipulated Miss Millikin.
+
+'No,' was the inflexible answer, '_at_ tea. It's all for his own good.'
+
+'Yes, dear, I'm sure you're right--but he has such pretty ways--I'm so
+afraid I shall forget.'
+
+'I'll remind you, Aunt Sophy. He shan't take advantage of you while
+_I'm_ here.'
+
+'You're just a tiny bit hard on him, Daisy, aren't you?'
+
+'Hard on Don!' cried Daisy, catching him up and holding him out at
+arm's length. 'Don, I'm _not_ hard on you, am I? I love you, only I see
+your faults, and you know it. You're full of deceitfulness' (here she
+kissed him between the eyes and set him down). 'Aunt Sophy, you would
+never have found out his trick about the milk if it hadn't been for
+me--_would_ you now?'
+
+'Perhaps not, my love,' agreed Miss Millikin mildly.
+
+The trick in question was a certain ingenious device of Don's for
+obtaining a double allowance of afternoon tea--a refreshment for which
+he had acquired a strong taste. The tea had once been too hot and burnt
+his tongue, and, as he howled with the pain, milk had been added. Ever
+since that occasion he had been in the habit of lapping up all but a
+spoonful or two of the tea in his saucer, and _then_ uttering a pathetic
+little yelp; whereupon innocent Miss Millikin would as regularly fill up
+the saucer with milk again.
+
+But, unfortunately for Don, his mistress had invited her niece Daisy to
+spend part of her summer holidays at her pretty cottage in the Lake
+District, and Daisy's sharper eyes had detected this little stratagem
+about the milk on the very first evening!
+
+Daisy was fourteen, and I fancy I have noticed that when a girl is about
+this age, she not unfrequently has a tendency to be rather a severe
+disciplinarian when others than herself are concerned. At all events
+Daisy had very decided notions on the proper method of bringing up
+dogs, and children too; only there did not happen to be any children at
+Applethwaite Cottage to try experiments upon; and she was quite sure
+that Aunt Sophy allowed herself to be shamefully imposed upon by Don.
+
+There was perhaps some excuse for Miss Millikin, for Don was a
+particularly charming specimen of the Yorkshire terrier, with a silken
+coat of silver-blue, set off by a head and paws of the ruddiest gold.
+His manners were most insinuating, and his great eyes glowed at times
+under his long hair, as if a wistful, loving little soul were trying to
+speak through them. But, though it seems an unkind thing to say, it must
+be confessed that this same soul in Don's eyes was never quite so
+apparent as when he was begging for some peculiarly appetising morsel.
+He was really fond of his mistress, but at meal times I am afraid he
+'put it on' a little bit. Of course this was not quite straightforward;
+but then I am not holding him up as a model animal.
+
+How far he understood the conversation that has been given above is more
+than I can pretend to say, but from that afternoon he began to be aware
+of a very unsatisfactory alteration in his treatment.
+
+Don had sometimes felt a little out of temper with his mistress for
+being slow to understand exactly what he _did_ want, and he had barked,
+almost sharply, to intimate to the best of his powers--'Not bread and
+butter, stoopid--_cake_!' So you may conceive his disgust when she did
+not even give him bread and butter; nothing but judicious
+advice--_without_ jam. She was most apologetic, it is true, and
+explained amply why she could not indulge him as heretofore, but Don
+wanted sugar, and not sermons. Sometimes she nearly gave way, and then
+cruel Daisy would intercept the dainty under his very nose, which he
+thought most unfeeling.
+
+He had a sort of notion that it was all through Daisy that they were
+just as stingy and selfish in the kitchen, and that his meals were now
+so absurdly few and plain. It was very ungrateful of her, for he had
+gone out of his way to be polite and attentive to her. When he thought
+of her behaviour to him he felt strongly inclined to sulk, but somehow
+he did not actually go so far as that. He liked Daisy; she was pretty
+for one thing, and Don always preferred pretty people, and then she
+stroked him in a very superior and soothing manner. Besides this, he
+respected her: she had been intrusted with the duty of punishing him on
+more than one occasion, and _her_ slaps really hurt, while it was
+hopeless to try to soften her heart by trying to lick the chastising
+hands--a manoeuvre which was always effective with poor Miss Millikin.
+So he contented himself with letting her see that though he did not
+understand her conduct towards him, he was willing to overlook it for
+the present.
+
+'What a wonderful improvement in the dear dog!' Miss Millikin remarked
+one morning at breakfast, after Don had been on short commons for a
+week or two. 'Really, Daisy, I begin to think you were quite right about
+him.'
+
+'Oh, I'm _sure_ I was,' said Daisy, who always had great confidence in
+her own judgment.
+
+'Yes,' continued her aunt, 'and, now he's so much better--just this one
+small bit, Daisy?' Don's eyes already had a green glitter in them and
+his mouth was watering.
+
+'No, Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy, 'I wouldn't--really. He's better without
+anything.'
+
+'I wish that girl was gone!' reflected poor Don, as he went sulkily back
+to his basket. 'It's enough to make a dog steal, upon my tail it is! I'm
+positively starved--no bones, no chicken, only beastly dry dog-biscuits
+and milk twice a day! I wish I could rummage about in gutters and places
+as Jock does--but I don't think the things you find in gutters are ever
+_really_ nice. Jock does--but he's just that low sort of dog who
+_would_!'
+
+Jock was a humble friend of his down in the village, a sort of distant
+relation to the Dandie Dinmonts; he was a rough, long-backed creature,
+as grey as a badger, and with a big solemn head like a hammer. Don was
+civil to him in a patronising way, but he did not tell him of the
+indignities he was subject to, perhaps because he had been rather given
+to boast of his influence over his mistress, and the high consideration
+he enjoyed at Applethwaite Cottage.
+
+Now Daisy used to go up for solitary rambles on the fells sometimes,
+when she generally took Don as a protector. He was becoming very nearly
+as active as ever, and now there was a stronger motive than before for
+pursuing the swallows--for he had a notion that they would be rather
+good eating. But one morning she missed him on her way back through the
+village by the lake; she was sure he was with her on the pier, and she
+had only stopped to ask some question at the ticket-office about the
+steamboat times; and when she turned round, Don was gone.
+
+However, her aunt was neither angry nor alarmed. Miss Millikin was not
+able to walk as much as Don wished, she said, so he was accustomed to
+take a great deal of solitary exercise; he was such a remarkably
+intelligent dog that he could be trusted to take care of himself--oh, he
+would come back.
+
+And towards dusk that evening Don did come back. There was a curious air
+about him--subdued, almost sad; Daisy remembered long afterwards how
+unusually affectionate he had been, and how quietly he had lain on her
+lap till bedtime.
+
+The next morning, when her aunt and she prepared to go for a walk along
+the lake, Don's excitement was more marked than usual; he leaped up and
+tried to caress their hands: he assured them in a thousand ways of the
+delight he felt at being allowed to make one of the party.
+
+After this, it was a painful surprise to find that he gave them the
+slip the moment they reached the village. But Miss Millikin said he
+always did prefer mountain scenery, and no doubt it was tiresome for him
+to have to potter about as they did. And Master Don began to give them
+less and less of his society in the daytime, and to wander from morn to
+dewy eve in solitude and independence; though whether he went up
+mountains to admire the view, or visited ruins and waterfalls, or spent
+his days hunting rabbits, no one at Applethwaite Cottage could even
+pretend to guess.
+
+'_One_ good thing, Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy complacently one evening, a
+little later, 'I've quite cured Don of being troublesome at meals!'
+
+'He couldn't be _troublesome_ if he tried, dear,' said Miss Millikin
+with mild reproof; 'but I must say you have succeeded quite
+wonderfully--how _did_ you do it?'
+
+'Why,' said Daisy, 'I spoke to him exactly as if he could understand
+every word, and I made him thoroughly see that he was only wasting his
+time by sitting up and begging for things. And you got to believe it at
+last, didn't you, dear?' she added to Don, who was lying stretched out
+on the rug.
+
+Don pricked the ear that was uppermost, and then uttered a heavy sigh,
+which smote his mistress to the heart.
+
+'Daisy,' she said, 'it's _no_ use--I _must_ give him something. Poor
+pet, he deserves it for being so good and patient all this time. One
+biscuit, Daisy?'
+
+Even Daisy relented: 'Well--a _very_ plain one, then. Let me give it to
+him, auntie?'
+
+The biscuit was procured, and Daisy, with an express intimation that
+this was a very particular indulgence, tendered it to the deserving
+terrier.
+
+He half raised his head, sniffed at it--and then fell back again with
+another weary little sigh. Daisy felt rather crushed. 'I'm afraid he's
+cross with me,' she said; 'you try, Aunt Sophy.' Aunt Sophy tried, but
+with no better success, though Don wagged his tail feebly to express
+that he was not actuated by any personal feeling in the matter--he had
+no appetite, that was all.
+
+'Daisy,' said Miss Millikin, with something more like anger than she
+generally showed, 'I was very wrong to listen to you about the diet.
+It's perfectly plain to me that by checking Don's appetite as we have we
+have done him serious harm. You can see for yourself that he is past
+eating anything at all now. Cook told me to-day that he had scarcely
+touched his meals lately. And yet he's stouter than ever--_isn't_ he?'
+
+Daisy was forced to allow that this was so. 'But what can it be?' she
+said.
+
+'It's _disease_,' said her aunt, very solemnly. 'I've read over and over
+again that corpulence has nothing whatever to do with the amount of food
+one eats. And, oh! Daisy, I don't want to blame you, dear--but I'm
+afraid we have been depriving him of the nourishing things he really
+needed to enable him to struggle against the complaint!'
+
+Poor Daisy was overcome by remorse as she knelt over the recumbent Don.
+'Oh, darling Don,' she said, 'I didn't mean it--you know I didn't, don't
+you? You must get well and forgive me! I tell you what, aunt,' she said
+as she rose to her feet, 'you know you said I might drive you over in
+the pony cart to that tennis-party at the Netherbys to-morrow. Well,
+young Mr. Netherby is rather a "doggy" sort of man, and nice too.
+Suppose we take Don with us and ask him to tell us plainly whether he
+has anything dreadful the matter with him?'
+
+Miss Millikin consented, though she did not pretend to hope much from
+Mr. Netherby's skill. 'I'm afraid,' she said, with a sigh, 'that only a
+very clever veterinary surgeon would find out what really is the matter
+with Don. But you can try, my dear.'
+
+The following afternoon Miss Millikin entrusted herself and Don to
+Daisy's driving, not without some nervous misgivings.
+
+'You're quite sure you can manage him, Daisy?' she said. 'If not, we can
+take John.'
+
+'Why, Aunt Sophy!' exclaimed Daisy, 'I _always_ drive the children at
+home; and sometimes when I'm on the box with Toppin, he gives me the
+reins in a straight part of the road, and Paul and Virginia pull like
+anything--Toppin says it's all _he_ can do to hold them.'
+
+Daisy was a little hurt at the idea that she might find Aunt Sophy's
+pony too much for her--a sleepy little 'slug of a thing,' as she
+privately called it, which pattered along exactly like a clockwork
+animal in urgent need of winding up.
+
+Don seemed a little better that day, and was lifted into the pony-cart,
+where he lay on the indiarubber mat, sniffing the air as if it was doing
+him good.
+
+Daisy really could drive well for her age, and woke the pony up in a
+manner that astonished her aunt, who remarked from time to time that she
+knew Wildfire wanted to walk now--he never could trot long at a
+time--and so they reached the Netherbys' house, which was five miles
+away towards the head of the lake, well under the hour, a most
+surprising feat--for Wildfire.
+
+It was a grown-up tennis-party, and Daisy, although she had brought her
+racket, was a little afraid to play; besides, she wanted to consult
+young Mr. Netherby about Don, who had been left with the cart in the
+stables.
+
+Mr. Netherby, who was a good-natured, red-faced young soldier, just
+about to join his regiment, was not playing either, so Daisy went up to
+him on the first opportunity.
+
+'You know about dogs, Mr. Netherby, don't you?'
+
+'Rath-er!' said Mr. Netherby, who was a trifle slangy. 'Why? Are you
+thinking of investing in a dog?'
+
+'It's Aunt Sophy's dog,' explained Daisy, 'and he's ill--_very_ ill--and
+we can't make out what's the matter, so I thought you would tell us
+perhaps?'
+
+'I'll ride over to-morrow and have a look at him.'
+
+'Oh, but you needn't--he's here. Wait--I'll fetch him--don't you come,
+please.'
+
+And presently Daisy made her appearance on the lawn, carrying Don, who
+felt quite a weight, in her arms. She set him down before the young man,
+who examined him in a knowing manner, while Miss Millikin, and some
+others who were not playing just then, gathered round. Don was languid,
+but dignified--he rather liked being the subject of so much notice.
+Daisy waited breathlessly for the verdict.
+
+'Well,' said Mr. Netherby, 'it's easy enough to see what's wrong with
+_him_. I should knock off his grub.'
+
+'But,' cried Miss Millikin, 'we _have_ knocked off his grub, as you call
+it. The poor dog is starved--literally starved.'
+
+Mr. Netherby said he should scarcely have supposed so from his
+appearance.
+
+'But I assure you he has eaten nothing--positively nothing--for days and
+days!'
+
+'Ah,' said Mr. Netherby, 'chameleon, is he? then he's had too much
+air--that's all.'
+
+Just then a young lady who had been brought by some friends living close
+by joined the group: 'Why,' she said at once, 'that's the little steamer
+dog. How did he come here?'
+
+'He is _not_ a little steamer dog,' said Miss Millikin in her most
+dignified manner; 'he is _my_ dog.'
+
+'Oh, I didn't know,' said the first speaker; 'but--but I'm sure I've
+seen him on the steamer several times lately.'
+
+'I never use the steamers unless I'm absolutely obliged--I disapprove of
+them: it must have been some other dog.'
+
+The young lady was positive she had made no mistake. 'You so seldom see
+a dog with just those markings,' she said, 'and I don't think anybody
+was with him; he came on board at Amblemere and went all round the lake
+with us.'
+
+'At Amblemere!' cried Daisy, 'that's where _we_ live; and, Aunt Sophy,
+you know Don has been away all day lots of times lately.'
+
+'What did this dog do on the steamer?' asked Miss Millikin faintly.
+
+'Oh, he was so sweet! he went round to everybody, and sat up so prettily
+till they gave him biscuits and things--he was everybody's pet; we were
+all jealous of one another for the honour of feeding him. The second
+time we brought buns on purpose. But we quite thought he belonged to
+the steamer.'
+
+Young Mr. Netherby laughed. 'So _that_ is how he took the air! I thought
+I wasn't far wrong,' he said.
+
+'Put him back in the cart, Daisy,' said Miss Millikin severely; 'I can't
+bear to look at him.'
+
+Don did his best to follow this dialogue, but all he could make out was
+that it was about himself, and that he was being as usual exceedingly
+admired. So he sat and looked as good and innocent and interesting as he
+knew how. Just then he felt that he would almost rather they did _not_
+offer him anything to eat--at least not anything very sweet and rich,
+for he was still not at all well. It was a relief to be back in the cart
+and in peace again, though he wondered why Daisy didn't kiss the top of
+his head as she had done several times in carrying him to the lawn. This
+time she held him at a distance, and said nothing but two words, which
+sounded suspiciously like 'You _pig_!' as she put him down.
+
+Miss Millikin was very grave and silent as they drove home. 'I can't
+trust myself to speak about it, Daisy,' she said; 'if--if it was true,
+it shows such an utter want of principle--such deceit; and Don used to
+be so honest and straightforward! What if we make inquiries at the pier?
+It--it may be all a mistake.'
+
+They stopped for this purpose at Amblemere. 'Ay, Miss Millikin, mum, he
+cooms ahn boord reglar, does that wee dug,' said the old boatman, 'and
+a' makes himsel' rare an' frien'ly, a' do--they coddle him oop fine,
+amang 'em. Eh, but he's a smart little dug, we quite look for him of a
+morning coomin' for his constitutionil, fur arl the worl' like a
+Chreestian!'
+
+'Like a very _greedy_ Christian!' said his disgusted mistress. 'Daisy,'
+she said, when she returned to the pony-cart, 'it's all true! I--I never
+have been so deceived in any one; and the worst of it is, I don't know
+how to punish him, or how to make him feel what a disgraceful trick this
+is. Nobody else's dog I ever heard of made his mistress publicly absurd
+in this way. It's so--so ungrateful!'
+
+'Aunt Sophy,' said Daisy, 'I've an idea. Will you leave him to me, and
+pretend you don't suspect anything? I _will_ cure him this time!'
+
+'You--you won't want to whip him?' said Miss Millikin, 'because, though
+it's all his own doing, he really is not well enough for it just now.'
+
+'No,' said Daisy, 'I won't tell you my plan, auntie, but it's better
+than whipping.'
+
+And all this time the unconscious Don was wearing an expression of
+uncomplaining suffering, and looking meekly sorry for himself, with no
+suspicion in the world that he had been found out.
+
+Next day he felt much better, and as the morning was bright he thought
+that, after all, he might manage another steamer trip; his appetite had
+come back, and his breath was not nearly so short as it had been. He
+was just making modestly for the gate when Daisy stopped him. 'Where are
+you going, sir?' she inquired.
+
+Don rolled over instantly with all his legs in the air and a feeble
+apology in his eye.
+
+'I want you for just one minute first,' said Daisy politely, and carried
+him into the morning-room. Was he going to be whipped?--she couldn't
+have the heart--an invalid like him! He tried to protest by his
+whimpering.
+
+But Daisy did nothing of the kind; she merely took something that was
+flat and broad and white, and fastened it round his neck with a very
+ornamental bow and ribbon. Then she opened the French windows, and said
+in rather a chilly voice, 'Now run away and get on your nasty steamer
+and beg, and see what you get by it!'
+
+That seemed, as far as he could tell, very sensible advice, and, oddly
+enough, it was exactly what he had been intending to do. It did not
+strike him as particularly strange that Daisy should know, because Don
+was a dog that didn't go very deeply into matters unless he was obliged.
+
+He trotted off at an easy pace down to the village, getting hungrier
+every minute, and hoping that the people on the steamer would have
+brought nice things to-day, when, close to the turning that led to the
+landing-stage, he met Jock, and was naturally obliged to stop for a few
+moments' conversation.
+
+He was not at all pleased to see him notwithstanding, for I am sorry to
+say that Don's greediness had so grown upon him of late that he was
+actually afraid that his humble friend (who was a little slow to find
+out when he wasn't wanted) would accompany him on to the steamboat, and
+then of course the good things would have to be divided.
+
+However, Don was a dog that was always scrupulously polite, even to his
+fellow-dogs, and he did not like to be rude now.
+
+'Hullo!' said Jock (in dogs' language of course, but I have reason to
+believe that what follows is as nearly as possible what was actually
+said). 'What's the matter with you this morning?'
+
+Don replied that he was rather out of sorts, and was going down to a
+certain lane for a dose of dog-grass.
+
+'A little dog-grass won't do _me_ any harm,' said Jock; 'I'll come too.'
+
+This was awkward, but Don pretended to be glad, and they went a little
+way together.
+
+'But what's that thing round your neck?' asked the Dandie Dinmont.
+
+'Oh,' said Don, 'that? It's a bit of finery they put on me at the
+cottage. It pleases _them_, you know. Think it's becoming?'
+
+'Um,' answered Jock; 'reminds me of a thing a friend of mine used to
+wear. But _he_ had a blind man tied to him. I don't see _your_ blind
+man.'
+
+'They would have given me a blind man of course if I'd asked for it,'
+said Don airily, 'but what's the use of a blind man--isn't he rather a
+bore?'
+
+'I didn't ask; but my friend said he believed the thing round his neck,
+which was flat and white just like yours (only he had a tin mug
+underneath his), made people more inclined to give him things--he didn't
+know why. Do _you_ find that?'
+
+'How stupid of Daisy to forget the mug!' thought Don. 'I could have
+brought things home to eat quietly then.--I don't know,' he replied to
+Jock; 'I haven't tried.'
+
+He meant to put it to the test very soon, though--if only he could get
+rid of Jock.
+
+'By the way,' he said carelessly, 'have you been round by the hotel
+lately?'
+
+'No,' answered Jock, 'not since the ostler threw a brush at me.'
+
+'Well,' said Don, 'there was a bone outside the porch, which, if I
+hadn't been feeling so poorly, I should have had a good mind to tackle
+myself. But perhaps some other dog has got hold of it by this time.'
+
+'I'll soon make him let go if he has!' said Jock, who liked a fight
+almost as well as a bone. '_Where_ was it, did you say?'
+
+'Outside the hotel. Don't let me keep you. It was a beautiful bone.
+Good-morning,' said Don.
+
+He did not think it worth while to explain that he had seen it several
+days ago, for Don, as you will have remarked already, was a very artful
+dog.
+
+He got rid of his unwelcome friend in this highly unprincipled manner,
+and strolled on to the pier full of expectation. Steamers ply pretty
+frequently on this particular lake, so he had not to wait very long. The
+little _Cygnet_ soon came hissing up, and the moment the gangway was
+placed Don stepped on board, with tail proudly erect.
+
+As usual, he examined the passengers, first to see who had anything to
+give, then who looked most likely to give it to him. Generally he did
+best with children. He was not fond of children (Daisy was quite an
+exception), but he was very fond of cakes, and children, he had
+observed, generally had the best cakes. Don was so accomplished a
+courtier that he would contrive to make every child believe that he or
+she was the only person he loved in the whole world, and he would stay
+by his victim until the cake was all gone, and even a little longer,
+just for the look of the thing, and then move on to some one else and
+begin again.
+
+There were no children with any cakes or buns on board this time,
+however. There was a stout man up by the bows, dividing his attention
+between scenery and sandwiches; but Don knew by experience that
+tourists' sandwiches are always made with mustard, which he hated. There
+were three merry-looking, round-faced young ladies on a centre bench,
+eating Osborne biscuits. He wished they could have made it
+sponge-cakes, because he was rather tired of Osborne biscuits; but they
+were better than nothing. So to these young ladies he went, and, placing
+himself where he could catch all their eyes at once, he sat up in the
+way he had always found irresistible.
+
+I don't suppose any dog ever found his expectations more cruelly
+disappointed. It was not merely that they shook their heads, they went
+into fits of laughter--they were laughing at him! Don was so deeply
+offended that he took himself off at once, and tried an elderly person
+who was munching seed-cake; she did not laugh, but she examined him
+carefully, and then told him with a frown to go away. He began to think
+that Daisy's collar was not a success; he ought to have had a mug, or a
+blind man, or both; he did much better when he was left to himself.
+
+Still he persevered, and went about, wagging his tail and sitting up
+appealingly. By and by he began to have an uncomfortable idea that
+people were saying things about him which were not complimentary. He was
+almost sure he heard the word 'greedy,' and he knew what that meant: he
+had been taught by Daisy. They must be talking of some other dog--not
+him; they couldn't possibly know what he was!
+
+Now Don was undeniably a very intelligent terrier indeed, but there was
+just this defect in his education--he could not read: he had no idea
+what things could be conveyed by innocent-looking little black marks.
+'Of course not,' some of my readers will probably exclaim, 'he was only
+a dog!' But it is not so absurd as it sounds, for one very distinguished
+man has succeeded in teaching his dogs to read and even to spell, though
+I believe they have not got into very advanced books as yet. Still, it
+may happen some day that all but hopelessly backward or stupid dogs will
+be able to read fluently, and then you may find that your own family dog
+has taken this book into his kennel, and firmly declines to give it up
+until he has finished it. At present, thank goodness, we have not come
+to this, and so there is nothing remarkable in the mere fact that Don
+was unable to read. I only mention it because, if he _had_ possessed
+this accomplishment, he would never have fallen into the trap Daisy had
+prepared for him.
+
+For the new collar was, as you perhaps guessed long ago, a card, and
+upon it was written, in Daisy's neatest and plainest round hand:--
+
+
+     I am a very Greedy little Dog, and have Plenty to eat at Home,
+     So please do not give me anything, or I shall have a Fit and die!
+
+
+You can easily imagine that, when this unlucky Don sat up and begged,
+bearing this inscription written legibly on his unconscious little
+chest, the effect was likely to be too much for the gravity of all but
+very stiff and solemn persons.
+
+Nearly everybody on board the steamer was delighted with him; they
+pointed out the joke to one another, and roared with laughter, until he
+grew quite ashamed to sit up any more. Some teased him by pretending to
+give him something, and then eating it themselves; some seemed almost
+sorry for him and petted him; and one, an American, said, 'It was
+playing it too low down to make the little critter give himself away in
+that style!' But nobody quite liked to disobey Daisy's written appeal.
+
+Poor Don could not understand it in the least; he only saw that every
+one was very rude and disrespectful to him, and he tried to get away
+under benches. But it was all in vain; people routed him out from his
+hiding-places to be introduced to each new comer; he could not go
+anywhere without being stared at, and followed, and hemmed in, and
+hearing always that same hateful whisper of 'Greedy dog--not to be given
+anything,' until he felt exactly as if he was being washed!
+
+Poor disappointed greedy dog, how gladly he would have given the tail
+between his legs to be safe at home in the drawing-room with Miss
+Millikin and Daisy! How little he had bargained for such a terrible trip
+as this!
+
+I am sure that if Daisy had ever imagined he would feel his disgrace so
+deeply she would not have had the heart to send him out with that
+tell-tale card around his neck; but then he would not have received a
+very wholesome lesson, and would certainly have eaten himself into a
+serious illness before the summer ended, so perhaps it was all for the
+best.
+
+This time Don did _not_ go the whole round of the lake; he had had
+quite enough of it long before the _Cygnet_ reached Highwood, but he did
+not get a chance until they came to Winderside, and then, watching his
+opportunity, he gave his tormentors the slip at last.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Two hours later, as Daisy and her aunt sat sketching under the big
+holm-oak on the lawn, a dusty little guilty dog stole sneakingly in
+under the garden-gate. It was Don, and he had run all the way from
+Winderside, which, though he did not appreciate it, had done him a vast
+amount of good. 'Oh!' cried Daisy, dropping her paint-brush to clap her
+hands gleefully, 'Look, Aunt Sophy, he has had his lesson already!'
+
+Miss Millikin was inclined to be shocked when she read the ticket. 'It
+was too bad of you, Daisy!' she said; 'I would never have allowed it if
+I had known. Come here, Don, and let me take the horrid thing off.'
+
+'Not yet, please, auntie!' pleaded Daisy, 'I want him to be quite cured,
+and it will take at least till bedtime. Then we'll make it up to him.'
+
+But Don had understood at last. It was this detestable thing, then, that
+had been telling tales of him and spoiling all his fun! Very well, let
+him find himself alone with it--just once! And he went off very soberly
+into the shrubbery, whence in a few minutes came sounds of 'worrying.'
+
+In half an hour Don came out again; his collar was gone, and in his
+mouth he trailed a long piece of chewed ribbon, which he dropped with
+the queerest mixture of penitence and reproach at Daisy's feet. After
+that, of course, it was impossible to do anything but take him into
+favour at once, and he was generous enough to let Daisy see that he bore
+her no malice for the trick she had played him.
+
+What became of the card no one ever discovered; perhaps Don had buried
+it, though Daisy has very strong suspicions that he ate it as his best
+revenge.
+
+But what is more important is that from that day he became a slim and
+reformed dog, refusing firmly to go on board a steamer on any pretence
+whatever, and only consenting to sit up after much coaxing, and as a
+mark of particular condescension.
+
+So that Daisy's experiment, whatever may be thought of it, was at least
+a successful one.
+
+
+
+
+_TAKEN BY SURPRISE_
+
+BEING THE PERSONAL STATEMENT OF BEDELL GRUNCHER, M.A.
+
+
+There are certain misconceptions which a man who is prominently before
+the public is morally bound to combat--more for the sake of others than
+his own--as soon as it becomes probable that the popular estimate of his
+character may be shaken, if not shattered, should he hold his peace.
+Convinced as I am of this, and having some ground to anticipate that the
+next few days may witness a damaging blow to my personal dignity and
+influence for good, I have thought it expedient to publish the true
+history of an episode which, if unexplained, is only too likely to
+prejudice me to a serious extent. Any circumstance that tends to
+undermine or lessen the world's reverence for its instructors is a
+deplorable calamity, to be averted at all hazards, even when this can
+only be effected by disclosures scarcely less painful to a delicate
+mind.
+
+For some years I, Bedell Gruncher, have consecrated my poor talents to
+the guidance and education of public taste in questions of art and
+literature. To do this effectively I have laboured--at the cost of some
+personal inconvenience--to acquire a critical style of light and playful
+badinage. My lash has ever been wreathed in ribbons of rare texture and
+daintiest hues; I have thrown cold water in abundance over the nascent
+flames of young ambition--but such water was systematically tinctured
+with attar of roses. And in time the articles appearing in various
+periodicals above the signature of 'Vitriol' became, I may acknowledge
+without false modesty, so many literary events of the first magnitude. I
+attribute this to my early recognition of the true function of a critic.
+It is not for him to set up sign-posts, or even warning-boards, for
+those who run and read. To attain true distinction he should erect a
+pillory upon his study table, and start the fun himself with a choice
+selection of the literary analogues of the superannuated eggs and futile
+kittens which served as projectiles in the past. The public may be
+trusted to keep it going, and also to retain a grateful recollection of
+the original promoter of the sport. My little weekly and monthly
+pillories became instantly popular, for all my kittens were well aimed,
+and my eggs broke and stuck in a highly entertaining fashion. We are so
+constituted that even the worst of us is capable of a kindly feeling
+towards the benefactor who makes others imperishably ridiculous in our
+eyes; and to do this was my _metier a moi_. At first my identity with
+the lively but terrible 'Vitriol' was kept a profound secret, but
+gradually, by some means which I do not at present remember, it leaked
+out, and I immediately became a social, as well as a literary,
+celebrity. Physically I have been endowed with a presence which, though
+not of unusual height and somewhat inclined to central expansion,
+produces, I find, an invariably imposing effect, especially with members
+of the more emotional and impressionable sex. Consequently I was not
+surprised even at the really extraordinary sensation I inspired upon my
+first introduction to a very charming young lady, Miss Iris Waverley, as
+soon as my _nom de guerre_ was (I forget just now by whom) incidentally
+alluded to. However, as it turned out, she had another and a deeper
+reason for emotion: it seemed she had been engaged to a young poet whose
+verses, to her untaught and girlish judgment, seemed inspired by
+draughts of the true Helicon, and whose rhythmical raptures had stirred
+her maiden heart to its depths.
+
+Well, that young poet's latest volume of verse came under my notice for
+review, and in my customary light-hearted fashion I held it up to
+general derision for a column or two, and then dismissed it, with an
+ineffaceable epigrammatic kick, to spin for ever (approximately) down
+the ringing grooves of criticism.
+
+Miss Waverley, it happened, was inclined to correct her own views by the
+opinions of others, and was, moreover, exceptionally sensitive to any
+association of ridicule with the objects of her attachment--indeed, she
+once despatched a dog she fondly loved to the lethal chamber at
+Battersea, merely because all the hair had come off the poor animal's
+tail! My trenchant sarcasms had depoetised her lover in a similar
+fashion; their livid lightning had revealed the baldness, the glaring
+absurdity of the very stanzas which once had filled her eyes with
+delicious tears; he was dismissed, and soon disappeared altogether from
+the circles which I had (in perfect innocence) rendered impossible to
+him.
+
+Notwithstanding this, Miss Waverley's first sentiments towards me were
+scarcely, oddly enough, of unmixed gratitude. I represented the rod, and
+a very commendable feeling of propriety made her unwilling to kiss me on
+a first interview, though, as our intimacy advanced--well, there are
+subjects on which I claim the privilege of a manly reticence.
+
+I hasten over, then, the intermediate stages of antipathy, fear,
+respect, interest, and adoration. In me she recognised an intellect
+naturally superior, too indifferent and unambitious to give life to its
+own imaginings--too honest, too devoted to humanity, to withhold merited
+condemnation from those of others. I was the radiant sun whose scorching
+beams melted the wax from the pinions of many a modern Icarus; or, to
+put the metaphor less ingeniously, the shining light in which, by an
+irresistible impulse of self-destruction, the poetical and artistic
+moths flew and incontinently frizzled.
+
+One trait in my character which Iris valued above all others was the
+caution with which I habitually avoided all associations of a ridiculous
+nature; for it was my pride to preserve a demeanour of unsullied dignity
+under circumstances which would have been trying, if not fatal, to an
+ordinary person. So we became engaged; and if, pecuniarily speaking, the
+advantage of the union inclined to my side, I cannot consider that I was
+the party most benefited by the transaction.
+
+It was soon after this happy event that Iris entreated from me, as a
+gift, a photograph of myself. I could not help being struck by this
+instance of feminine parsimony with regard to small disbursements,
+since, for the trifling sum of one shilling, it was perfectly open to
+her to procure an admirable presentment of me at almost any stationer's;
+for, in obedience to a widely expressed demand, I had already more than
+once undergone the ordeal by camera.
+
+But no; she professed to desire a portrait more peculiarly her own--one
+that should mark the precise epoch of our mutual happiness--a caprice
+which reminded me of the Salvation Army recruit who was photographed, by
+desire, 'before and after conversion'; and I demurred a little, until
+Iris insisted with such captivating pertinacity that--although my
+personal expenses (always slightly in excess of my income) had been
+further swelled since my engagement by the innumerable _petits soins_
+expected by an absurd custom from every lover--I gave way at length.
+
+It was her desire that my portrait should form a pendant to one of
+herself which had been recently taken by a fashionable photographer, and
+I promised to see that this wish should be gratified. It is possible
+that she expected me to resort to the same artist; but there were
+considerations which induced me to avoid this, if I could. To the extent
+of a guinea (or even thirty shillings) I could refuse her nothing; but
+every one knows what sums are demanded by a photographer who is at all
+in vogue. I might, to be sure, as a public character, have sat without
+being called upon for any consideration, beyond the right to dispose of
+copies of my photograph; but I felt that Iris would be a little hurt if
+I took this course, and none of the West-end people whom I consulted in
+the matter quite saw their way to such an arrangement just then. There
+was a temporary lull, they assured me, in the demand for likenesses of
+our leading literary men, and I myself had been photographed within too
+recent a period to form any exception to the rule.
+
+So, keeping my promise constantly in mind, I never entered a secluded
+neighbourhood without being on the look-out for some unpretending
+photographic studio which would combine artistic excellence with
+moderate charges.
+
+And at last I discovered this photographic phoenix, whose nest, if I
+may so term it, was in a retired suburb which I do not care to
+particularise. Upon the street level was a handsome plate-glass window,
+in which, against a background of dark purple hangings and potted ferns,
+were displayed cartes, cabinets, and groups, in which not even my
+trained faculties could detect the least inferiority to the more costly
+productions of the West-end, while the list of prices that hung by the
+door was conceived in a spirit of exemplary modesty. After a brief
+period of hesitation I stepped inside, and, on stating my wish to be
+photographed at once, was invited by a very civil youth with a slight
+cast in his eye to walk upstairs, which I accordingly did.
+
+I mounted flight after flight of stairs, till I eventually found myself
+at the top of the house, in an apartment pervaded by a strong odour of
+chemicals, and glazed along the roof and the whole of one side with
+panes of a bluish tint. It was empty at the moment of my entrance, but,
+after a few minutes, the photographer burst impetuously in--a tall young
+man, with long hair and pale eyes, whose appearance denoted a nervous
+and high-strung temperament. Perceiving him to be slightly overawed by a
+certain unconscious dignity in my bearing, which frequently does produce
+that effect upon strangers, I hastened to reassure him by discriminating
+eulogies upon the specimens of his art that I had been inspecting
+below, and I saw at once that he was readily susceptible to flattery.
+
+'You will find me,' I told him frankly, 'a little more difficult to
+satisfy than your ordinary _clientele_; but, on the other hand, I am
+peculiarly capable of appreciating really good work. Now I was struck at
+once by the delicacy of tone, the nice discrimination of values, the
+atmosphere, gradation, feeling, and surface of the examples displayed in
+your window.'
+
+He bowed almost to the ground; but, having taken careful note of his
+prices, I felt secure in commending him, even to the verge of
+extravagance; and, besides, does not the artistic nature demand the
+stimulus of praise to enable it to put forth its full powers?
+
+He inquired in what style I wished to be taken, whether full-length,
+half-length, or vignette. 'I will answer you as concisely as possible,'
+I said. 'I have been pressed, by one whose least preference is a law to
+me, to have a photograph of myself executed which shall form a
+counterpart or pendant, as it were, to her own. I have, therefore, taken
+the precaution to bring her portrait with me for your guidance. You will
+observe it is the work of a firm in my opinion greatly
+overrated--Messrs. Lenz, Kamerer, & Co.; and, while you will follow it
+in style and the disposition of the accessories, you will, I make no
+doubt, produce, if you take ordinary pains, a picture vastly superior in
+artistic merit.'
+
+This, as will be perceived, was skilfully designed to put him on his
+mettle, and rouse a useful spirit of emulation. He took the portrait of
+Iris from my hands and carried it to the light, where he examined it
+gravely in silence.
+
+'I presume,' he said at length, 'that I need hardly tell you I cannot
+pledge myself to produce a result as pleasing as this--under the
+circumstances?'
+
+'That,' I replied, 'rests entirely with you. If you overcome your
+natural diffidence, and do yourself full justice, _I_ see no reason why
+you should not obtain something even more satisfactory.'
+
+My encouragement almost unmanned him. He turned abruptly away and blew
+his nose violently with a coloured silk handkerchief.
+
+'Come, come,' I said, smiling kindly, 'you see I have every confidence
+in you--let us begin. I don't know, by the way,' I added, with a sudden
+afterthought, 'whether in your leisure moments you take any interest in
+contemporary literature?'
+
+'I--I have done so in my time,' he admitted; 'not very lately.'
+
+'Then,' I continued, watching his countenance with secret amusement for
+the spasm I find this announcement invariably produces upon persons of
+any education, 'it may possibly call up some associations in your mind
+if I tell you that I am perhaps better known by my self-conferred
+_sobriquet_ of "Vitriol."'
+
+Evidently I had to do with a man of some intelligence--I obtained an
+even more electrical effect than usual. '"_Vitriol!_"' he cried, '_not_
+surely Vitriol, the great critic?'
+
+'The same,' I said carelessly. 'I thought I had better mention it.'
+
+'You did well,' he rejoined, 'very well! Pardon my emotion--may I wring
+that hand?'
+
+It is not my practice to shake hands with a photographer, but I was
+touched and gratified by his boyish enthusiasm, and he seemed a
+gentlemanly young fellow too, so I made an exception in his favour; and
+he did wring my hand--hard.
+
+'So you are Vitriol?' he repeated in a kind of daze, 'and you have
+sought me out--_me_, of all people in the world--to have the honour of
+taking your photograph!'
+
+'That is so,' I said, 'but pardon me if I warn you that you must not
+allow your head to be turned by what is, in truth, due to the merest
+accident.'
+
+'But what an accident!' he cried; 'after what I have learnt I really
+could not think of making any charge for this privilege!'
+
+That was a creditable and not unnatural impulse, and I did not check it.
+'You shall take me as often as you please,' I said, 'and for nothing.'
+
+'And may I,' he said, a little timidly--'would you give me permission to
+exhibit the results?'
+
+'If I followed my own inclinations,' I replied, 'I should answer
+"certainly not." But perhaps I have no right to deprive you of the
+advertisement, and still less to withhold my unworthy features from
+public comment. I may, for private reasons,' I added, thinking of Iris,
+'find it advisable to make some show of displeasure, but you need not
+fear my taking any proceedings to restrain you.'
+
+'We struggling photographers must be so careful,' he sighed. 'Suppose
+the case of your lamented demise--it would be a protection if I had some
+written authority under your hand to show your legal representatives.'
+
+'_Actio personalis moritur cum persona_,' I replied; 'if my executors
+brought an action, they would find themselves non-suited.' (I had
+studied for the Bar at one period of my life.)
+
+'Quite so,' he said, 'but they might drag me into court, nevertheless. I
+should really prefer to be on the safe side.'
+
+It did not seem unreasonable, particularly as I had not the remotest
+intention either of bringing an action or dying; so I wrote him a hasty
+memorandum to the effect that, in consideration of his photographing me
+free of charge (I took care to put _that_ in), I undertook to hold him
+free from all molestation or hindrance whatever in respect of the sale
+and circulation of all copies resulting from such photographing as
+aforesaid.
+
+'Will that do?' I said as I handed it to him.
+
+His eyes gleamed as he took the document. 'It is just what I wanted,'
+he said gratefully; 'and now, if you will excuse me, I will go and bring
+in a few accessories, and then we will get to work.'
+
+He withdrew in a state of positive exultation, leaving me to
+congratulate myself upon the happy chance which had led me to his door.
+One does not discover a true artist every day, capable of approaching
+his task in a proper spirit of reverence and enthusiasm; and I had
+hardly expected, after my previous failures, to be spared all personal
+outlay. My sole regret, indeed, was that I had not stipulated for a
+share in the profits arising from the sale--which would be doubtless a
+large one; but meanness is not one of my vices, and I decided not to
+press this point.
+
+Presently he returned with something which bulged inside his velvet
+jacket, and a heap of things which he threw down in a corner behind a
+screen.
+
+'A few little properties,' he said; 'we may be able to introduce them
+by-and-by.'
+
+Then he went to the door and, with a rapid action, turned the key and
+placed it in his pocket.
+
+'You will hardly believe,' he explained, 'how nervous I am on occasions
+of importance like this; the bare possibility of interruption would
+render me quite incapable of doing myself justice.'
+
+I had never met any photographer quite so sensitive as that before, and
+I began to be uneasy about his success; but I know what the artistic
+temperament is, and, as he said, this was not like an ordinary
+occasion.
+
+'Before I proceed to business,' he said, in a voice that positively
+trembled, 'I must tell you what an exceptional claim you have to my
+undying gratitude. Amongst the many productions which you have visited
+with your salutary satire you may possibly recall a little volume of
+poems entitled "Pants of Passion"?'
+
+I shook my head good-humouredly. 'My good friend,' I told him, 'if I
+burdened my memory with all the stuff I have to pronounce sentence upon,
+do you suppose my brain would be what it is?'
+
+He looked crestfallen. 'No,' he said slowly, 'I ought to have known--you
+would not remember, of course. But _I_ do. I brought out those Pants.
+Your mordant pen tore them to tatters. You convinced me that I had
+mistaken my career, and, thanks to your monitions, I ceased to practise
+as a Poet, and became the Photographer you now behold!'
+
+'And I have known poets,' I said encouragingly, 'who have ended far less
+creditably. For even an indifferent photographer is in closer harmony
+with nature than a mediocre poet.'
+
+'And I _was_ mediocre, wasn't I?' he inquired humbly.
+
+'So far as I recollect,' I replied (for I did begin to remember him
+now), 'to attribute mediocrity to you would have been beyond the
+audacity of the grossest sycophant.'
+
+'Thank you,' he said; 'you little know how you encourage me in my
+present undertaking--for you will admit that I can _photograph_?'
+
+'That,' I replied, 'is intelligible enough, photography being a pursuit
+demanding less mental ability in its votaries than that of metrical
+composition, however halting.'
+
+'There is something very soothing about your conversation,' he remarked;
+'it heals my self-love--which really was wounded by the things you
+wrote.'
+
+'Pooh, pooh!' I said indulgently, 'we must all of us go through that in
+our time--at least all of _you_ must go through it.'
+
+'Yes,' he admitted sadly, 'but it ain't pleasant, is it?'
+
+'Of that I have never been in a position to judge,' said I; 'but you
+must remember that your sufferings, though doubtless painful to
+yourself, are the cause, under capable treatment, of infinite pleasure
+and amusement to others. Try to look at the thing without egotism. Shall
+I seat myself on that chair I see over there?'
+
+He was eyeing me in a curious manner. 'Allow me,' he said; 'I always
+pose my sitters myself.' With that he seized me by the neck and
+elsewhere without the slightest warning, and, carrying me to the further
+end of the studio, flung me carelessly, face downwards, over the
+cane-bottomed chair to which I had referred. He was a strong athletic
+young man, in spite of his long hair--or might that have been, as in
+Samson's case, a contributory cause? I was like an infant in his hands,
+and lay across the chair, in an exceedingly uncomfortable position,
+gasping for breath.
+
+'Try to keep as limp as you can, please,' he said, 'the mouth wide open,
+as you have it now, the legs careless--in fact, trailing. Beautiful!
+don't move.'
+
+And he went to the camera. I succeeded in partly twisting my head round.
+'Are you _mad_?' I cried indignantly; 'do you really suppose I shall
+consent to go down to posterity in such a position as this?'
+
+I heard a click, and, to my unspeakable horror, saw that he was
+deliberately covering me from behind the camera with a revolver--_that_
+was what I had seen bulging inside his pocket.
+
+'I should be sorry to slay any sitter in cold blood,' he said, 'but I
+must tell you solemnly, that unless you instantly resume your original
+pose--which was charming--you are a dead man!'
+
+Not till then did I realise the awful truth--I was locked up alone, at
+the top of a house, in a quiet neighbourhood, with a mad photographer!
+Summoning to my aid all my presence of mind, I resumed the original pose
+for the space of forty-five hours--they were seconds really, but they
+_seemed_ hours; it was not needful for him to exhort me to be limp
+again--I was limper than the dampest towel!
+
+'Thank you very much,' he said gravely as he covered the lens; 'I think
+that will come out very well indeed. You may move now.'
+
+I rose, puffing, but perfectly collected. 'Ha-ha,' I laughed in a sickly
+manner (for I _felt_ sick), 'I--I perceive, sir, that you are a
+humorist.'
+
+'Since I have abandoned poetry,' he said as he carefully removed the
+negative to a dark place, 'I have developed a considerable sense of
+quiet humour. You will find a large Gainsborough hat in that
+corner--might I trouble you to put it on for the next sitting?'
+
+'Never!' I cried, thoroughly revolted. 'Surely, with your rare artistic
+perception, you must be aware that such a headdress as that (which is no
+longer worn even by females) is out of all keeping with my physiognomy.
+I will _not_ sit for my photograph in such a preposterous thing!'
+
+'I shall count ten very slowly,' he replied pensively, 'and if by the
+time I have finished you are not seated on the back of that chair, your
+feet crossed so as to overlap, your right thumb in the corner of your
+mouth, a pleasant smile on your countenance, _and_ the Gainsborough hat
+on your head, you will need no more hats on this sorrowful earth.
+One--two----'
+
+I was perched on that chair in the prescribed attitude long before he
+had got to seven! How can I describe what it cost me to smile, as I sat
+there under the dry blue light, the perspiration rolling in beads down
+my cheeks, exposed to the gleaming muzzle of the revolver, and the
+steady Gorgon glare of that infernal camera?
+
+'That will be extremely popular,' he said, lowering the weapon as he
+concluded. 'Your smile, perhaps, was a _little_ too broad, but the pose
+was very fresh and unstudied.'
+
+I have always read of the controlling power of the human eye upon wild
+beasts and dangerous maniacs, and I fixed mine firmly upon him now as I
+said sternly, 'Let me out at once--I wish to go.'
+
+Perhaps I did not fix them quite long enough; perhaps the power of the
+human eye has been exaggerated: I only know that for all the effect mine
+had on him they might have been oysters.
+
+'Not yet,' he said persuasively, 'not when we're getting on so nicely. I
+may never be able to take you under such favourable conditions again.'
+
+That, I thought, I could undertake to answer for; but who, alas! could
+say whether I should ever leave that studio alive? For all I knew, he
+might spend the whole day in photographing me, and then, with a madman's
+caprice, shoot me as soon as it became too dark to go on any longer! The
+proper course to take, I knew, was to humour him, to keep him in a good
+temper, fool him to the top of his bent--it was my only chance.
+
+'Well,' I said, 'perhaps you're right. I--I'm in no great hurry. Were
+you thinking of taking me in some different style? I am quite at your
+disposition.'
+
+He brought out a small but stout property-mast, and arranged it against
+a canvas background of coast scenery. 'I generally use it for children
+in sailor costume,' he said, 'but I _think_ it will bear your weight
+long enough for the purpose.'
+
+I wiped my brow. 'You are not going to ask me to climb that thing?' I
+faltered.
+
+'Well,' he suggested, 'if you will just arrange yourself upon the
+cross-trees in a negligent attitude, upside down, with your tongue
+protruded as if for medical inspection, I shall be perfectly satisfied.'
+
+I tried argument. 'I should have no objection in the world,' I said;
+'it's an excellent idea--only, _do_ sailors ever climb masts in that
+way? Wouldn't it be better to have the thing correct while we're about
+it?'
+
+'I was not aware that you were a sailor,' he said; '_are_ you?'
+
+I was afraid to say I was, because I apprehended that, if I did, it
+might occur to him to put me through some still more frightful
+performance.
+
+'Come,' he said, 'you won't compel me to shed blood so early in the
+afternoon, will you? Up with you.'
+
+I got up, but, as I hung there, I tried to obtain a modification of
+some of the details. 'I don't think,' I said artfully, 'that I'll put
+out my tongue--it's rather overdone, eh? _Everybody_ is taken with his
+tongue out nowadays.'
+
+'It is true,' he said, 'but I am not well enough known in the profession
+yet to depart entirely from the conventional. Your tongue out as far as
+it will go, please.'
+
+'I shall have a rush of blood to the head, I know I shall,' I protested.
+
+'Look here,' he said; 'am I taking this photograph, or are you?'
+
+There was no possible doubt, unfortunately, as to who was taking the
+photograph. I made one last remonstrance. 'I put it to you as a sensible
+man,' I began; but it is a waste of time to put anything to a raving
+lunatic as a sensible man. It is enough to say that he carried his
+point.
+
+'I wish you could see the negative!' he said as he came back from his
+laboratory. 'You were a little red in the face, but it will come out
+black, so it's all right. That carte will be quite a novelty, I flatter
+myself.'
+
+I groaned. However, this was the end; I would get away now at all
+hazards, and tell the police that there was a dangerous maniac at large.
+I got down from the mast with affected briskness. 'Well,' I said, 'I
+mustn't take advantage of your good nature any longer. I'm exceedingly
+obliged to you for the--the pains you have taken. You will send _all_
+the photographs to this address, please?'
+
+'Don't go yet,' he said. 'Are you an equestrian, by the way?'
+
+If I could only engage him in conversation I felt comparatively secure.
+
+'Oh, I put in an appearance in the Row sometimes, in the season,' I
+replied; 'and, while I think of it,' I added, with what I thought at the
+time was an inspiration, 'if you will come with me now, I'll show you my
+horse--you might take me on horseback, eh?' I did not possess any such
+animal, but I wanted to have that door unlocked.
+
+'Take you on horseback?' he repeated. 'That's a good idea--I had rather
+thought of that myself.'
+
+'Then come along and bring your instrument,' I said, 'and you can take
+me at the stables; they're close by.'
+
+'No need for that,' he replied cheerfully. 'I'll find you a mount here.'
+
+And the wretched lunatic went behind the screen and wheeled out a small
+wooden quadruped covered with large round spots!
+
+'She's a strawberry roan,' he said; 'observe the strawberries. So, my
+beauty, quiet, then! Now settle yourself easily in the saddle, as if you
+were in the Row, with your face to the tail.'
+
+'Listen to me for one moment,' I entreated tremulously. 'I assure you
+that I am not in the habit of appearing in Rotten Row on a spotted
+wooden horse, nor does any one, I assure you--_any_ one mount a horse of
+any description with his face towards the crupper! If you take me like
+that, you will betray your ignorance--you will be laughed at!'
+
+When people tell you it is possible to hoodwink the insane by any
+specious show of argument, don't believe them; my own experience is that
+demented persons can be quite perversely logical when it suits their
+purpose.
+
+'Pardon me,' he said, '_you_ will be laughed at possibly--not I. I
+cannot be held responsible for the caprices of my clients. Mount,
+please; she'll carry you perfectly.'
+
+'I will,' I said, 'if you'll give me the revolver to hold. I--I should
+like to be done with a revolver.'
+
+'I shall be delighted to do you with a revolver,' he said grimly, 'but
+not yet; and if I lent you the weapon now, I could not answer for your
+being able to hold the horse as well--she has never been broken in to
+firearms. _I'll_ hold the revolver. One--two--three.'
+
+I mounted; why had I not disregarded the expense and gone to Lenz and
+Kamerer? Lenz does not pose his customers by the aid of a revolver.
+Kamerer, I was sure, would not put his patrons through these degrading
+tomfooleries.
+
+He took more trouble over this than any of the others; I was
+photographed from the back, in front, and in profile; and if I escaped
+being made to appear abjectly ridiculous, it can only be owing to the
+tragic earnestness which the consciousness of my awful situation lent to
+my expression.
+
+As he took the last I rolled off the horse, completely prostrated. 'I
+think,' I gasped faintly, 'I would rather be shot at once--_without_
+waiting to be taken in any other positions. I really am not equal to any
+more of this!' (He was quite capable, I felt, of photographing me in a
+perambulator, if it once occurred to him!)
+
+'Compose yourself,' he said soothingly, 'I have obtained all I wanted. I
+shall not detain you much longer. Your life, I may remark, was never in
+any imminent danger, as this revolver is unloaded. I have now only to
+thank you for the readiness with which you have afforded me your
+co-operation, and to assure you that early copies of each of the
+photographs shall be forwarded for Miss Waverley's inspection.'
+
+'Miss Waverley!' I exclaimed; 'stay, how do _you_ know that name?'
+
+'If I mistake not, it was her photograph that you kindly brought for my
+guidance. I ought to have mentioned, perhaps, that I once had the honour
+of being engaged to her--until you (no doubt from the highest motives)
+invested my little gift of song with a flavour of unromantic ridicule.
+That ridicule I am now enabled to repay, with interest calculated up to
+the present date.'
+
+'So you are Iris's poet!' I burst out, for, somehow, I had not
+completely identified him till that moment. 'You scoundrel! do you think
+I shall allow you to circulate those atrocious caricatures with
+impunity? No, by heavens! my solicitor shall----'
+
+'I rely upon the document you were kind enough to furnish,' he said
+quietly. 'I fear that any legal proceedings you may resort to will
+hardly avert the publicity you seem to fear. Allow me to unfasten the
+door. Good-bye; mind the step on the first landing. Might I beg you to
+recommend me amongst your friends?'
+
+I went out without another word; he was mad, of course, or he would not
+have devised so outrageous a revenge for a fancied injury, but he was
+cunning enough to be my match. I knew too well that if I took any legal
+measures, he would contrive to shift the whole burden of lunacy upon
+_me_. I dared not court an inquiry for many reasons, and so I was
+compelled to pass over this unparalleled outrage in silence.
+
+Iris made frequent inquiries after the promised photograph, and I had to
+parry them as well as I could--which was a mistake in judgment on my
+part, for one afternoon while I was actually sitting with her, a packet
+arrived addressed to Miss Waverley.
+
+I did not suspect what it might contain until it was too late. She
+recognised that photographs were inside the wrappings, which she tore
+open with a cry of rapture--and then!
+
+She had a short fainting fit when she saw the Gainsborough hat, and as
+soon as she revived, the extraordinary appearance I presented upside
+down on the mast sent her into violent hysterics. By the time she was in
+a condition to look at the equestrian portraits she had grown cold and
+hard as marble. 'Go,' she said, indicating the door, 'I see I have been
+wasting my affection upon a vulgar and heartless buffoon!'
+
+I went--for she would listen to no explanations; and indeed I doubt
+whether, even were she to come upon this statement, it would serve to
+restore my tarnished ideal in her estimation. But, though I have lost
+her, I am naturally anxious (as I said when I began) that the public
+should not be misled into drawing harsh conclusions from what, if left
+unexplained, may doubtless have a singular appearance.
+
+It is true that, up to the present, I have not been able to learn that
+any of those fatal portraits have absolutely been exposed for sale,
+though I direct my trembling steps almost every day to Regent Street,
+and search the windows of the Stereoscopic Company with furtive and
+foreboding eyes, dreading to be confronted with presentments of
+myself--Bedell Gruncher, 'Vitriol,' the great critic!--lying across a
+chair in a state of collapse, sucking my thumb in a Gainsborough hat,
+or bestriding a ridiculous wooden horse with my face towards its tail!
+
+But they cannot be long in coming out now; and my one hope is that these
+lines may appear in print in time to forestall the prejudice and scandal
+which are otherwise inevitable. At all events, now that the world is in
+possession of the real facts, I am entitled to hope that the treatment
+to which I have been subjected will excite the indignation and sympathy
+it deserves.
+
+
+
+
+_PALEFACE AND REDSKIN_
+
+A COMEDY-STORY FOR GIRLS AND BOYS
+
+
+
+
+ACT THE FIRST
+
+WHERE IS THE ENEMY?
+
+
+It was a very hot afternoon, and Hazel, Hilary, and Cecily Jolliffe were
+sitting under the big cedar on the lawn at The Gables. Each had her
+racket by her side, and the tennis-court lay, smooth and inviting, close
+by; but they did not seem inclined to play just then, and there was
+something in the expression of all three which indicated a common
+grievance.
+
+'Well,' said Hazel, the eldest, who was nearly fourteen, 'we need not
+have excited ourselves about the boys' holidays, if we had only known.
+They don't give us much of their society--why, we haven't had one single
+game of cricket together yet!'
+
+'And then to have the impudence to tell us that they didn't care much
+about _our_ sort of cricket!' said Hilary, 'when I can throw up every
+bit as far as Jack, and it takes Guy three overs to bowl me! It's
+beastly cheek of them.'
+
+'_Hilary!_' cried Cecily, 'what would mother say if she heard you talk
+like that?'
+
+'Oh, it's the holidays!' said Hilary, lazily. 'Besides, it is a shame!
+They would have played with us just as they used to, if it hadn't been
+for that Clarence Tinling.'
+
+'Yes,' Hazel agreed, 'he hates cricket. I do believe that's the reason
+why he invented this silly army, and talked Jack and Guy into giving up
+everything for it.'
+
+'They haven't any will of their own, poor things!' said Hilary.
+
+'You forget, Hilary,' put in Cecily, 'Tinling is the guest. They ought
+to give way to him.'
+
+'Well,' said Hilary, 'it's ridiculous for great boys who have been two
+terms at school to go marching about with swords and guns. Big babies!'
+
+Perhaps there was a little personal feeling at the bottom of this, for
+she had offered herself for enlistment, and had been sternly rejected on
+the ground of her sex.
+
+'I wish he would go, I know that,' said Hazel, making a rather vicious
+little chop at her shoe with her racket; 'those boys talk about nothing
+but their stupid army from morning to night. Uncle Lambert says they
+make him feel quite gunpowdery at lunch. And what do you think is the
+last thing they've done?--put up a great fence all round their tent, and
+shut themselves up there all day!'
+
+'Except when they're sentries and hide,' put in Hilary; 'they're always
+jumping up somewhere and wanting you to give the countersign. It isn't
+like home, these holidays!'
+
+'Perhaps,' suggested Cecily, 'it makes things safer, you know.'
+
+'Duffer, Cis!' cried Hilary, contemptuously, for Cecily had appointed
+herself professional peacemaker to the family, and her efforts were
+about as successful as such domestic offices ever are.
+
+'Look out!' cried Hilary, presently; 'they're coming. Don't let's take
+the least notice of them. They hate that more than anything.'
+
+From the shrubbery filed three boys, the first and tallest of whom wore
+an imposing dragoon's helmet with a crimson plume, and carried a
+sabretache and crossbelts, and wore red caps like those of the French
+army; they carried guns on their shoulders.
+
+'Halt! 'Tention! Dis-miss!' shouted the commanding officer, and the army
+broke off with admirable precision.
+
+'Don't be alarmed,' said the General considerately to the three girls;
+'the army is only out on fatigue duty.'
+
+'Then wouldn't the army like to sit down?' suggested Hilary, forgetting
+all about her recent proposal.
+
+'Ah, you don't understand,' said General Tinling with some pity. 'It's
+a military term.'
+
+He was a pale, puffy boy, with reddish hair and freckles, who was
+evidently fully alive to the dignity of his position.
+
+'Suppose we let military things alone for a little while,' said Hazel.
+'We want the army to come and play tennis. You will, won't you, Jack and
+Guy? and Cis will umpire--she likes it.'
+
+'I don't mind a game,' said Jack.
+
+'I'll play, if you like,' added Guy; but he had forgotten that the
+General was a bit of a martinet.
+
+'That's nice discipline,' he said. 'I don't know whether you know it;
+but in some armies you'd be court-martialled for less than that.'
+
+'Well, may we, then?' asked Guy a little impatiently.
+
+'No salute now!' cried his superior. 'I shall never make you fellows
+smart. Why, at the Haversacks, last Easter, there were half a dozen of
+us, and we drilled like machines. Of course you mayn't play tennis--this
+is only a bivouac; and it's over now. Attention! The left wing of the
+force will occupy the shrubbery; the right will push on and blow up the
+gate.
+
+'Which of us is the left wing?' inquired Guy.
+
+'You are, of course.'
+
+'Oh, all right; only you said Jack was just now,' grumbled Guy, who was
+evidently a little disposed to rebel at being deprived of his tennis.
+
+'Look here,' said the General; 'either let's do the thing thoroughly, or
+not do it at all. It's no pleasure to _me_ to be General, I can tell
+you; and if I can't have perfect discipline in the ranks--why, we might
+as well drop the army altogether!'
+
+'Oh, all right,' said Jack, who was a sweet-tempered boy, 'we won't do
+it again.'
+
+And they went off to carry out their separate instructions, Clarence
+Tinling remaining by the cedar.
+
+'I have to be a little sharp now and then,' he explained. 'Why, if I
+didn't keep an iron rule over them, they'd be getting insubordinate in
+no time. You mustn't think I've any objection to their playing tennis,
+or anything of that sort; only discipline must be kept up; though it
+seems severe, perhaps, to you.'
+
+'It doesn't seem to be half bad fun for _you_, at all events,' said
+Hazel.
+
+'Of course,' added Hilary, whose cheeks were flushed and eyes
+suspiciously bright as she plucked all the blades of grass that were
+within her reach, 'we're glad if you're enjoying being here; but it's a
+little slow for us girls. You might give the army a half-holiday now and
+then.'
+
+'An army, especially a small army, like ours,' said Clarence, grandly,
+'ought to be constantly prepared for action; else it's no use. Then,
+look at the protection it is. Why, we've just built a fortified place
+close to the kitchen garden, where you could all retire to if we were
+attacked; and, properly provisioned, we could hold out for almost any
+time.'
+
+'Thank you,' said Hilary. 'I should feel a good deal safer in the
+box-room. And then, who's going to attack us?'
+
+'Well, you never know,' replied Clarence; 'but, if they did come, it's
+something to feel we should be able to defend ourselves.'
+
+'Yes, Hilary,' Cecily remarked, 'an army would certainly be a great
+convenience then.'
+
+'That would depend on what it did,' said her sister. 'It wouldn't be
+much of a convenience if it ran away.'
+
+'I don't think Jack and Guy would ever do that,' observed Hazel.
+
+'I suppose that means that you think I should?' inquired Clarence, who
+was quick at discovering personal allusions.
+
+'I wasn't thinking about you at all,' said Hazel, with supreme
+indifference; 'we don't know you well enough to say whether you're brave
+or not--we do know our brothers.'
+
+'There wouldn't be much sense in my being the General if I wasn't the
+bravest, would there?' he demanded.
+
+'Well, as to that, you see,' retorted Hilary, 'we don't see much sense
+in any of it.'
+
+'Girls can't be expected to see sense in anything,' he said sulkily.
+
+'At all events, no one can be expected to see bravery till there's some
+danger,' said Hazel; 'and there isn't the least!'
+
+'That's all you know about it; but I've something more important to do
+than stay here squabbling. I'm off to see what the army's up to.' And he
+marched off with great pomp.
+
+When he had disappeared, Hilary remarked frankly, 'Isn't he a pig?'
+
+'I don't think it's nice to call our visitors "pigs," Hilary!'
+remonstrated Cecily, 'and he's not really more greedy than most boys.'
+
+'Don't lecture, Cis. I didn't mean he was that kind of pig--I said he
+was a pig. And he is!' said Hilary, not over lucidly. 'I wonder what
+Jack and Guy can see in him. I thought that when they wrote asking him
+to be invited, that he'd be sure to be such a jolly boy!'
+
+'He may be a jolly boy--at school,' was all that even the tolerant
+Cecily could find to urge in his favour.
+
+'I believe,' said Hazel, 'that they're not nearly so mad about him as
+they were--didn't you notice about the tennis just now?'
+
+'He bullies them--that's what it is,' explained Hilary; 'only with
+talking, I mean, of course, but he talks such a lot, and he will have
+his own way, and, if they say anything, he reminds them he's a visitor,
+and ought to be humoured. I wish it was any use getting Uncle Lambert to
+speak to him--but he's so stupid!'
+
+'Is he, though?' said a lazy voice from behind the cedar.
+
+'Oh, Uncle Lambkin!' cried Hilary, 'I didn't know you were there!'
+
+'Don't apologise,' was the answer. 'I know it must be a trial to have an
+uncle on the verge of imbecility--but bear with me. I am at least
+harmless.'
+
+'Of course we know you're really rather clever,' said Hazel, 'but you
+_are_ stupid about some things--you never interfere, whatever people
+do!'
+
+'Don't I, really?' said their uncle, as he disposed himself on his back,
+and tilted his hat over his nose; 'you do surprise me! What a mistake
+for a man to make, who has come down for perfect quiet! Whom shall I
+begin to interfere with?'
+
+'Well, you might snub that horrid Tinling boy, instead of encouraging
+him, as you always do!'
+
+'Encourage him! He's got a fine flow of martial enthusiasm, and a good
+supply of military terms, and I listen when he gives me long accounts of
+thrilling engagements, when he came out uncommonly strong--and the
+enemy, so far as I can gather, never came out at all. I'm passive,
+because I can't help myself; and then he amuses me in his way--that's
+all.'
+
+'Do you believe he's brave, uncle?'
+
+'I only know that I saw him kill two wasps with his teaspoon,' was the
+reply. 'They don't award the Victoria Cross for it--but it's a thing I
+couldn't have done myself.'
+
+'I should hope not!' exclaimed Hilary; 'but everybody knows you're a
+coward,' she added (she did not intend this remark to be taken
+seriously), 'and you're awfully lazy. Still, there are some things you
+might do!'
+
+'If that means fielding long-leg till tea-time, I respectfully disagree.
+Irreverent girls, have you never been taught that a digesting uncle is a
+very solemn and sacred thing?'
+
+'Now you are going to be idiotic again! But as to cricket--why, you must
+know that we never get a game now! And next summer I shall be too old to
+play!'
+
+'I _never_ mean to be too old for cricket,' said Hilary, with
+conviction; 'but we've had none for weeks, uncle, positive weeks!'
+
+'Quite right, too!' observed Uncle Lambert, sleepily. 'Not a game for
+girls--only spoil your hands--do you think I want a set of nieces with
+paws like so many glovers' signs?'
+
+'That's utter nonsense,' said Hazel, calmly, 'because we always play in
+gloves. Mother makes us. At least, when we did play. Now the boys will
+only play soldiers, and, if they do happen to be inclined for a set at
+tennis, Clarence comes up and orders them off as pickets or outposts, or
+something!'
+
+'But he's not Bismarck or Boulanger, is he? I always understood this was
+a free country.'
+
+'You know what Guy and Jack are--they can't bear their visitor to think
+he isn't welcome.'
+
+'Well, they seem to have made him feel very much at home--but it isn't
+my business; if they choose to declare the house in a state of siege,
+and turn the garden into a seat of war, I can't help it--I'd rather they
+wouldn't, but it's your mother's affair, not mine!'
+
+And he closed the discussion by lighting a cigarette, and relapsing into
+a contented silence.
+
+Uncle Lambert was short and stout, with a round red face, a heavy auburn
+moustache, and little green eyes which never seemed to notice anything.
+His nieces were fond of him, though they often wished he would pay them
+the occasional compliment of talking sensibly; but he never did, and he
+spent all his time at The Gables in elaborately doing nothing at all.
+
+Clarence Tinling had gone off in a decided huff--so much so indeed that
+he left his devoted army to carry out their rather misty manoeuvres
+without any help from him. He was beginning to find a falling-off in
+their docility of late, which was no doubt owing to their sisters; it
+was excessively annoying to him that those girls should be so difficult
+to convince of the protective value of a fortress, and especially that
+they should decline to take his own superior nerve and courage for
+granted. And the worst of it was, nothing but some imminent danger was
+ever likely to convince them, such were their prejudice and
+narrow-mindedness.
+
+Later that afternoon the family assembled for tea in the cool, shady
+dining-room; Mrs. Jolliffe, with a gentle anxiety on her usually placid
+face, sat at the head (Colonel Jolliffe was away shooting in the North
+just then). 'Where are all the boys?' she said, looking round the table.
+'Why don't they come in?'
+
+'It's no use asking us, mother,' said Hilary, 'we see so very little of
+them ever.'
+
+'Very likely they are washing their hands,' said her mother.
+
+'So _like_ them!' murmured Uncle Lambert in confidence to his tea-cake.
+'But here's the noble General, at all events. Well, Field Marshal, what
+have you done with the Standing Army?'
+
+Tinling addressed himself to his hostess. 'Oh, Mrs. Jolliffe, I'm so
+sorry I was late, but I had just to run round to the stables for a
+minute. Oh, the other two? They're on duty--they're guarding the camp.
+In fact, I can't stay here very long myself.'
+
+'But the poor dear boys must have their tea!' cried Mrs. Jolliffe.
+
+'Well, you know,' said their veteran officer, as he helped himself to
+the marmalade, 'I don't think a little roughing it is at all a bad
+thing for them--teaches them that a soldier's life is not all jam.'
+
+'No,' said Hazel, 'the General seems to get most of that.'
+
+All Clarence said was: 'I'll trouble one of you girls for the tea-cake.'
+
+'I don't think it's fair that the poor army should "rough," as you call
+it, while you stuff, Clarence,' said Hazel, indignantly. 'Mustn't they
+come in to tea, mother? It is such nonsense!'
+
+'Yes, dear, run and call them in,' said Mrs. Jolliffe. 'I can't let my
+boys go without their meals, Clarence, it's so bad for them.'
+
+'It's not discipline,' said the chief; 'still, if they must come, you
+had better take them this permit from me.' And he scribbled a line on a
+scrap of paper, which he handed to Hazel, who received it with the
+utmost disdain.
+
+Hazel crossed the lawn and over a little rustic bridge to the kitchen
+garden and hothouses, beyond which was the paddock, where the fortress
+had been erected. It was a very imposing construction, built, with some
+help from the village carpenter, of portions of some disused fencing.
+The stockade had loopholes in it, and above the top she could see a
+fluttering flag and the point of a tent. Jack was perched up on a kind
+of look-out, and Guy was pacing solemnly before the covered entrance
+with a musket of very mild aspect over his shoulder.
+
+'Who goes there?' he called out, some time after recognising her.
+
+Hazel vouchsafed no direct reply to this challenge. 'You're to come in
+to tea _directly_,' she announced in her most peremptory tone.
+
+'Advance, and give the countersign,' said the sentinel.
+
+'Don't be a donkey!' returned Hazel, tossing back her long brown hair
+impatiently.
+
+Guy levelled his firearm. It is exasperating when a sister can't enter
+into the spirit of the thing better than that. Who ever heard of a
+sentry being told, on challenging, 'not to be a donkey'? 'My orders are
+to fire on all suspicious persons,' he informed her.
+
+Hazel stopped both her ears. 'No, Guy, please--it makes me jump so.'
+
+'There's no cap on,' said he.
+
+'Then there's a ramrod, or a pea, or something horrid,' she objected;
+'do turn it the other way.'
+
+'Hazel's all right, Guy,' said Jack, in rebuke of this excessive zeal;
+'we can let her pass.'
+
+'As if I wanted to pass!' exclaimed Hazel. 'I only came to bring you
+back to tea; and if you're afraid to go without leave, there's a
+permission from Clarence for you.'
+
+'Oh! come in and have a look now you're here,' said the garrison more
+hospitably. 'You can't think how jolly the inside is.'
+
+'Well, if I must,' she said; though, as a matter of fact, she was
+exceedingly curious to see the interior of the stronghold.
+
+'It's like the ones in "Masterman Ready" and "Treasure Island," you
+see,' explained Jack, proudly. 'And it's pierced for musketry, too; we
+could open a withering fire on besiegers before they could come near
+us.'
+
+'They would have to be rather stupid to want to besiege this, wouldn't
+they?' said Hazel.
+
+'I don't see that--besiegers must besiege something. And it is snug,
+isn't it, now?'
+
+Hazel was secretly much impressed. In the centre of the enclosure was
+the commander's tent, with a lantern fixed at the pole for night
+watches; and rugs and carpets were strewn about; at one of the angles of
+the palisading was the look-out--an elaborate erection of old wine-cases
+and egg-boxes--on the top of which was fixed a seven-and-sixpenny
+telescope that commanded the surrounding country for quite a hundred
+yards.
+
+She was not the person, however, to go into raptures; she merely smiled
+a rather teasing little smile, and said, 'Mar-vellous!' but somehow,
+whatever sarcasm underlay this was accepted by both boys as a tribute.
+
+'You can see now,' said Guy, in a reasonable tone, 'that there wouldn't
+have been room here for all you girls--now, would there?'
+
+'Girls are always in the way--everywhere,' said Hazel, with a
+reproachful inflection which was quite lost upon her brothers.
+
+'I knew you'd be sensible about it,' said Jack; 'you can't think what
+fun we have in here--especially at night, when the lantern's lit. Hallo!
+there's some one calling.'
+
+A shrill whistle sounded from the kitchen garden, and, a moment after, a
+stone came flying over the stockade, and was stopped by the canvas of
+the tent.
+
+'That's cool cheek!' said Jack; 'get up and reconnoitre, Guy--quick!'
+
+Guy mounted the scaffold, and brought the telescope to bear upon the
+immediate neighbourhood with admirable coolness and science--but no
+particular result.
+
+'We shall have to scour the bush and see if we can find any traces of
+the enemy,' said he with infinite relish.
+
+'Was that the stone?' said Hazel, pointing to one that lay at the foot
+of the fence; 'because there seems to be some paper wrapped round it.'
+
+'So there is!' said Jack, proceeding to unfold it. Presently he
+exclaimed, 'I _say_!'
+
+'What is it now?' asked Hazel.
+
+'Nothing for you--it's private!' said Jack, mysteriously. 'Here, Guy,
+come down and look at this.'
+
+Guy read it and whistled. 'We must report this to the General at once,'
+he said gravely.
+
+Both boys were very solemn, and yet had a certain novel air of satisfied
+importance.
+
+'Shall we tell her?' asked Guy.
+
+'She must know it some time,' returned Jack; 'we'll break it by
+degrees.--We've just had notice that we're going to be attacked by Red
+Indians, Hazel; don't be alarmed.'
+
+'I'll try not to be,' she said, conquering a very strong inclination to
+laugh. She saw that they took it quite seriously; and, though she had at
+once suspected that some one in the village was playing them a trick,
+she did not choose to enlighten them. Hazel had a malicious desire to
+see what the General would do. 'I don't believe he will like the idea at
+all,' she said to herself. 'What fun it will be!'
+
+Hazel's expectations seemed about to be fulfilled; for already she could
+hear steps on the plank of the little bridge, and in another minute the
+General himself entered the fortress.
+
+'I say, you fellows,' he began, 'this is too bad--no one on guard, and a
+girl inside! Why, she might be a spy for anything you could tell!'
+
+'Thank you, Clarence!' said Hazel; for this insinuation was rather
+trying to a person of her dignity.
+
+'I say, General,' began Jack, 'never mind about rowing us now; we've
+some queer news to report. This has just fallen into our hands.'
+
+Hazel watched Tinling closely as he read the paper. It was grimy, and
+printed in lead pencil, and contained these words:--'BE ON THE LUKOUT.
+RED INGIANS ON THE WORPATH. I HERD THEM SAYING THEY MENT TO ATACK YURE
+FORT AT NITEFAL. FROM A FREND.'
+
+She was soon compelled to own that she had done him a great injustice.
+He was certainly as far as possible from betraying the slightest fear;
+on the contrary, his eye seemed actually to brighten with satisfaction.
+He behaved exactly as all heroes in books of adventure do on such
+occasions--he went through it twice carefully, and then inquired at what
+time the warning had arrived.
+
+'About five minutes ago. Round a stone,' answered Guy, with true
+military conciseness.
+
+'This will be a bad business,' observed the General, his face
+brightening with the joy of battle. 'We have no time to spare--we must
+give these demons a lesson they will not forget!' (this was out of the
+books). 'Look to your arms, my men, and see that we are provisioned for
+a siege (you might get the cook to give us some of that shortbread, and
+the rest of the cake we had at tea, Private Jack). We cannot tell to
+what straits we may be reduced.'
+
+'Then,' inquired Hazel, demurely, 'you mean to stay here and fight
+them?'
+
+'To the last gasp!' said the General.
+
+Hazel liked him better then than she had done since his first arrival.
+
+'He really is a plucky boy after all,' she thought. 'I wonder if it will
+last?'
+
+
+
+
+ACT THE SECOND
+
+WHERE IS THE ARMY?
+
+
+The General's self-possession and resource were indeed remarkable.
+
+'We ought to have a cannon,' he said; 'there's a big roll of matting
+somewhere in the house. If we got that, and widened a loophole, and
+shoved it through, it would look just like the muzzle of a cannon in the
+dark.'
+
+'Would that frighten a Red Indian much?' asked Hazel.
+
+'Not if he knew what it was, perhaps; but who's going to tell him? Jack,
+just run up to the house, like a good fellow, and see if you can find
+it, will you? You can go with him, Guy.'
+
+'You seem rather to like the idea of being attacked,' said Hazel, when
+she and Clarence were alone together. He was gratified to notice the new
+friendliness in her voice.
+
+'Well, you see,' he explained loftily, 'I don't suppose I'm pluckier
+than most people, but it just happens that I'm not afraid of Red
+Indians, that's all; when I saw all those at Buffalo Bill's I wasn't
+even excited: it's constitutional, I fancy.' He always modelled his talk
+a good deal upon books, and a crisis like this naturally brought out his
+largest language.
+
+'I'd better see you safe back to the house, I think,' he added; 'I don't
+expect them for an hour yet, but you can never depend on savages--they
+might be lurking about the grounds already, for what we know.'
+
+And, although Hazel had her own private ideas about the reality of the
+danger, she was struck by his coolness and courage, for which, whether
+justified or not by the occasion, she was quite fair-minded enough to
+give him due credit.
+
+Meanwhile, the other two boys, bursting with excitement, had rushed up
+to the verandah, under which their mother and uncle were sitting.
+
+'Mother! Uncle Lambert! What do you think? Our camp is going to be
+attacked this very night by Indians!'
+
+'Yes, dears,' said Mrs. Jolliffe, serenely; 'but have you had your teas
+yet?'
+
+Trifles such as these harrow the martial soul more than conflicts.
+
+'But, mother, did you hear what we said? The fort is to be stormed by
+Red Indians!'
+
+'Very well, dears, so long as you don't make too much noise,' was the
+sole comment of this most provokingly placid lady. What she ought to
+have done was, of course, to throw down her work, raise her eyes to the
+clouds, clasp her hands, and observe, in an agitated tone, 'Heaven
+protect us! We are lost!' But few mothers are capable of really rising
+to emergencies of this kind.
+
+Hilary and Cecily had been playing tennis, and, overhearing the alarming
+news, came up to the steps of the verandah. 'Did you say Red Indians
+were coming here?'
+
+Uncle Lambert shook his head lugubriously. 'I always warned your
+father,' he remarked; 'but he _would_ come to live in Berkshire.'
+
+'Why?' inquired Cecily. 'Is Berkshire a bad place for Red Indians,
+uncle?'
+
+'I should say it was one of the worst places in all Europe!' he said
+solemnly.
+
+Both Hilary and Cecily had heard and read a good deal about Red Indians
+lately, and had also, with their brothers, visited the American
+Exhibition, so that it did not strike either of them as unlikely just
+then that there should be a few scattered about in England, just as
+gipsies are.
+
+'But what are you going to do about it?' they asked their brother.
+
+'Lick 'em, of course!' said Guy. 'Now you see that an army is some use,
+after all.'
+
+'Don't be taken alive, there's good boys,' advised their frivolous
+uncle, who seemed still unable to realise the extreme gravity of the
+occasion. 'Sell your lives as dearly as possible.'
+
+'What is the use of telling them that, uncle?' exclaimed Cecily. 'They
+wouldn't get the money; and do you think any of _us_ would touch it? How
+can you talk in that horrid way? Jack and Guy, don't go to that camp.
+Let the Indians have it, if they want to; you can soon build another.'
+
+'You don't understand,' said Jack, impatiently. 'We can't have a lot of
+Red Indians in our camp--it wouldn't be safe for you.'
+
+'Oh, I shall go and speak to Clarence,' she cried. 'I'm sure he won't
+want to fight them.' And she ran down to the end of the lawn, where he
+could be seen returning with Hazel.
+
+'I want to speak to you quite alone,' she said. 'No, Hazel, it's a
+secret,' and she drew him aside.
+
+'Clarence,' she said, and her blue eyes were dark with fear, 'tell
+me--are the Indians really coming?'
+
+'You can judge for yourself,' he said, and gave her the paper. 'We've
+just had this thrown over the stockade. It seems to have been written by
+somebody who is in their secrets.'
+
+'How badly Red Indians do spell!' said Cecily, shuddering as she read.
+
+'It may be a white man's writing,' he said; 'perhaps a prisoner, or a
+confederate who repents.'
+
+'But, Clarence, dear,' entreated Cecily (ten minutes ago she would not
+have added the epithet), 'you won't stay out and sit up for them, will
+you?'
+
+'Do you think we're a set of cowards?' he demanded grandly.
+
+'Not you, Clarence; but--but Jack and Guy are not very big boys, are
+they? I mean, they're a little too young to fight full-sized Indians.'
+
+'There will be all sorts of sized Indians, I expect,' said Clarence. 'Of
+course, I don't say they'll come. They may think discretion's the better
+part of valour when they find we're prepared; but I must say I
+anticipate an attack myself.'
+
+'I wish you would do without Jack and Guy. Couldn't you?' suggested
+Cecily.
+
+His eyes gleamed. 'Cecily,' he said, 'tell me the worst--the army are
+getting in a funk?'
+
+'No,' she cried; and then she resolved to sacrifice their reputation for
+their safety. 'At least, they haven't said anything; but I'm sure they'd
+feel more comfortable in the drawing-room. Can't you order them to stay
+and guard us? You're General.'
+
+'And I am to face the foe alone?' he cried. 'Well, I am older than them'
+(I must decline to be responsible for the grammar of the characters of
+this story). 'I have lived my life--I shall be the less missed.... Let
+it be as you say.'
+
+All this was strictly according to the books, and he enjoyed himself
+immensely.
+
+'Thank you, dear, dear Clarence. I'd no idea you were so noble and
+brave. Try not to let those Indians hit you.'
+
+'I cannot answer for the future,' he said; 'but since you wish it I will
+do my best.'
+
+After all there was some good in girls. Here was one who said exactly
+the right things, without needing any prompting whatever.
+
+Cecily hunted up Jack and Guy, who were poking about in the house.
+'You're not to guard the stockade,' she announced, with ill-concealed
+triumph.
+
+'Oh, aren't we, though?' said Guy; 'who says so? Not mother!'
+
+'No--Clarence; he said I was to tell you to go on duty in the
+drawing-room.'
+
+'What bosh!' said Guy. 'As if any Indians would come there! I don't care
+what Clarence says, I shall go in the stockade!'
+
+'So shall I! 'said Jack. 'Now let's get that piece of matting, and go
+down sharp--the evening star's out already.'
+
+Poor Cecily was in despair; what was to be done when they were so
+obstinate as this?
+
+'I know where there's some beautiful matting,' she said.
+
+'Where? Tell us, quick!'
+
+'Come with me, and I'll show you.' She led the way along a corridor to
+the wing where the billiard-room was. 'Wait till I see if it's there
+still,' she said, and went into the billiard-room and looked around.
+'Yes, it _is_ there,' she told them as she came out.
+
+'I don't see it, Cecily; where?' they cried from within.
+
+Cecily shut the door softly, and turned the key (which she had managed
+to abstract on entering) in the outer lock.
+
+'It's on the floor,' she cried through the keyhole; 'I didn't tell a
+story--and don't be angry, boys, dear, it's all for your good!'
+
+Then, without waiting to hear their indignant outcry, she scudded along
+the corridor and down the staircase, with the sounds of muffled shouts
+and kicks growing fainter behind her.
+
+'I don't mind so much now,' she thought; 'they'll be awfully angry when
+they come out--but the Indians will have gone by that time!'
+
+Clarence had already retreated to his stronghold when she entered the
+drawing-room.
+
+Everything seemed as usual; Uncle Lambert, in evening dress, was playing
+desultory snatches from _Ruddigore_. Mrs. Jolliffe came down presently,
+and he took her in to dinner with one of his tiresome jokes. No one
+seemed at all anxious about poor Tinling, fighting all alone down in the
+paddock.
+
+She curled herself up on a settee by one of the open windows, and
+listened, trying to catch the sound of Indian yells. 'Hazel,' she said
+anxiously, 'do you think the Indians will hurt Tinling?'
+
+Hazel gave a little laugh. 'I don't think the army's in any very great
+danger, Cis,' she replied.
+
+'Hazel doesn't believe there are any Indians at all,' explained Hilary.
+
+'Well,' said Cecily, softly, 'I've kept the army out of danger, whether
+there are or not!'
+
+But she felt relieved by her sisters' evident tranquillity, and
+by-and-by, when Mrs. Jolliffe came in from the dining-room and settled
+down with her embroidery as if there were not the least chance of a
+savage coming whooping in the open window, Cecily almost forgot her
+fears.
+
+They came back in full force, however, as, a little later on, she heard
+a quick, light step on the gravel outside, and started with a little
+scream of terror. 'Don't tell them where the army are!' she cried; and
+then she saw that her alarm was needless, for it was the gallant General
+who stepped into the room. Hazel looked up from the album which she was
+making for a children's hospital, Hilary threw away her book, Mrs.
+Jolliffe had ceased to embroider, but that was because she was
+peacefully dozing.
+
+'Victory!' said Clarence, waving his sword.
+
+'Then they did come?' cried Cecily, triumphantly.
+
+'Rather!' he replied. 'I couldn't tell how many there were, but they
+were overcome with panic at the first discharge. I fancy _these_ Indians
+had never heard firearms before.'
+
+'How funny that we shouldn't have heard any now!' remarked Hazel,
+resting her chin on her palms, while her grey eyes had a rather mocking
+sparkle in them.
+
+'Not funny at all,' he said, 'considering the wind was the other way. I
+let them come on, and then poured a volley into the thickest part of
+their ranks--that made them waver, and then I made a sortie, and you
+should have just seen them scuttle!'
+
+'I wish I had,' said Hazel, as she pasted another Christmas card into
+her album. 'And weren't you wounded at all?'
+
+'A mere scratch,' he said lightly (which is what book-heroes always
+say).
+
+'It looks as if you had been amongst the gooseberry-bushes,' said
+Hilary, examining his arm as he pulled up his sleeve.
+
+'Does it? Well, I only know it's lucky for me there were no poisoned
+arrows.'
+
+'Oughtn't you to have it burnt, though, Clarence, just in case?'
+suggested Cecily, in all good faith; 'there's sure to be a red-hot poker
+in the kitchen.'
+
+But Clarence was very decidedly of opinion that such a precaution was
+not necessary.
+
+'And you're quite sure the Indians are all gone?' she asked.
+
+'There isn't one of 'em within miles,' he said confidently, 'I'll answer
+for that.'
+
+'Then come upstairs with me, and we'll let the army out. They'll be in
+such a temper!'
+
+They found the two boys, who had tired of kicking and shouting by that
+time, sitting gloomily on the long seats in the dark.
+
+'Guy, dear--Jack,' said Cecily, timidly, 'you can come out now. Clarence
+has beaten the Indians.'
+
+'Without us?' groaned Guy. 'Cecily, I'll never speak to you again!
+Tinling, I--we--you don't think we funked, do you? She locked us up
+here!'
+
+All the General's native magnanimity came out now.
+
+'We won't say any more about it,' he said. 'It was rather a close shave,
+with only one man to do it all. But, there, I managed somehow, and
+perhaps it was just as well you weren't there. The first rush was no
+joke, I can tell you.'
+
+Jack punched his own head with both hands.
+
+'Oh, it's too bad!' he said--he was almost in tears. 'They'll all think
+we deserted you! Did you kill many of them, Tinling?'
+
+'I didn't see any corpses,' he replied; 'but I shouldn't be surprised if
+some of them died when they got home.'
+
+'They may come again to-morrow night,' said Jack, more cheerfully.
+
+'Not much fear of that--they've had their lesson. They were seized with
+utter panic.'
+
+'Which way did they go?' asked Guy, evidently bent on pursuing them.
+
+'Oh, in all directions. But you wouldn't catch them up now; they ran too
+fast for me even!'
+
+'Then I shall go to bed,' said the entire army, in great depression. 'It
+is a shame we couldn't be there. Good-night, General.' And, pointedly
+ignoring poor Cecily, they marched off to their quarters. She looked
+wistfully after them.
+
+'They'll never forgive me--I know they won't!' she said to Tinling.
+
+'Don't you mind,' he said, 'you acted very wisely. And, after all, these
+raw young troops can never be depended on under fire, you know--I mean,
+under arrows.'
+
+Cecily drew herself up a little haughtily.
+
+'I locked them in because I didn't want them to get hurt,' she said,
+'not because I thought they'd be afraid.'
+
+Uncle Lambert did not hear about the result of the engagement until the
+following day, but then, to make up for any delay, he heard a good deal
+about it. Even Clarence was not quite prepared for the enthusiasm he
+showed.
+
+'Splendid, my boy, splendid!' he kept repeating, while he hit him rather
+hard on the back; 'you're a hero. A grateful country ought to give you
+the Bath for it. I shall take care this affair is generally known.'
+
+And the poor army looked on with hot cheeks and envious eyes. But for
+Cecily, they might have been heroes, too!
+
+Even Hazel seemed to have understood that a really brilliant victory had
+been achieved; she brought Tinling a magnificent flag of pink glazed
+calico, on which she had painted in crimson letters: 'Indians' Terror.'
+
+'I did not think of making the motto "Seven at one blow,"' she said,
+with a mischievous dimple.
+
+'I like the other best,' said the General, unsuspectingly.
+
+Jack and Guy went down to the camp as usual, but for some time they were
+in very low spirits, in spite of their commander's well-meant efforts to
+raise them.
+
+'You'll do better next time,' he said kindly.
+
+'But we've told you over and over again how it was!' they would exclaim.
+
+'Yes, I know, I know. It's all right. I'm not complaining: I never
+expected you to be as cool as I was, your first time.' But even this did
+not seem to console the army to any large extent; they hunched their
+shoulders and kicked pebbles about with great apparent interest.
+
+The fact was, they could not help seeing that they had lost their
+prestige. It was true that their mother and elder sister at least (in
+spite of the flag) did not seem to treat the past danger with all the
+seriousness it deserved. It even struck Jack and Guy sometimes that
+they were under the delusion that the whole thing had been only a new
+development of the game. But as the General said: 'Even if that were so,
+it was kinder not to undeceive them. He certainly was contented to leave
+them in their error; he knew well enough what he had had to go
+through--he did not like even now to think of his despair when he found
+he would have to face the danger all alone.'
+
+He was always making the army writhe by little unintentional reminders
+of this kind, and they had cruel misgivings that Uncle Lambert, though
+he was always quite kind and encouraging, did not in his heart believe
+that their unfortunate absence in the hour of peril was quite an
+accident on their part.
+
+How they longed for an opportunity of wiping out their disgrace, and how
+their hearts sank when Tinling, from the depths of his experience,
+declared it very improbable that the attack would ever again be renewed.
+In the school-stories, the good boy who refuses to fight when he is
+kicked, and is sent to Coventry as a coward, always gets a speedy chance
+to clear his character. Someone (generally the very boy who kicked him)
+falls into a mill-stream, or a convenient horse runs away, or else a mad
+but considerate bull comes into the playground--and the good boy is
+always at hand to dive, or hang on to the bridle and be dragged several
+yards in the dust, or slowly retreat backwards, throwing down first his
+hat and then his coat to amuse and detain the infuriated bull.
+
+But out of stories, unfortunately, as even Jack and Guy dimly perceived,
+things are not always arranged so satisfactorily. They might have to
+wait for weeks, perhaps months or years, before Uncle Lambert fell into
+the fish-pond--and, even if he did, he could probably swim better than
+they could. Then they were neither of them sure that they could
+successfully stop a runaway horse, or a maniac bull, without a little
+more practice than they had had as yet.
+
+However, Fortune was kind, and took pity on them in a most unexpected
+manner. For one morning, soon after breakfast, when Hazel was practising
+in the music-room, and Hilary and Cecily feeding their rabbits, Jack
+came up in a highly-excited state of mind to the verandah where his
+officer was seated doing nothing in particular. 'General,' he said, with
+a very creditable salute, 'do come down to the camp at once.'
+
+'Oh, bother!' said the veteran warrior, who had, by the way, shown
+rather a tendency to rest on his laurels of late.
+
+'No, but it isn't humbug, really,' protested Jack; 'it's something
+you'll like awfully.'
+
+The General marched down in a very stately manner; it would have been
+undignified to run, eager as he was to get down to the stockade,
+thinking it not unlikely that Lintoft, the carpenter, really had found
+time to make a cannon for them after all, or, at the very least, that
+there would be some change in the internal arrangements of the
+stronghold which it would be his duty as superior officer to criticise,
+if not condemn.
+
+Now it must be explained here that, during the last two or three days,
+the outside wall of the fort had been placarded with various bills, all
+glorying in the recent repulse of the enemy by a single-handed defender,
+and containing most insulting reflections on the courage of Red Indians
+as a race; while, in case they might not have enough knowledge of
+English to understand these taunts, they were accompanied by sketches
+which were certainly scathing enough to infuriate the least susceptible
+savage.
+
+To do Clarence justice, they were not due to any elation on his part,
+but had all been executed by the army in the wild hope that they might
+thus stir up the foe to a fresh demonstration, when they themselves
+might recover their lost spurs.
+
+These placards, as Clarence found on reaching the stockade, had been
+scrawled over with a kind of red and yellow paint so as to be quite
+illegible.
+
+'Ochre,' said Guy; 'but that's not the best of it, for we found this
+pinned with an arrow to one of the posts.' And he produced a thin strip
+of white bark, on which were writing and drawings in crimson. 'They must
+have done it with their own blood,' commented Jack, with great gusto;
+'but read it--do read it.'
+
+Clarence did not need a second invitation to read the document, which
+was as follows:--
+
+
+                  'WAH NA SA PASH BOO (YELLOW VULTURE),
+
+        _Chief of Black Bogallala Tribe, to the Great White Chief,
+                          Tin Lin_, DEFIANCE.
+
+     'The wigwam of Yellow Vulture wants but one ornament--the scalp of
+     the white chief. Yellow Vulture has seen the taunts calling the red
+     warriors "women with the hearts of deer." He will show the Paleface
+     that the anger of the dusky ones is a big heap-lot terrible. When
+     the sun has set behind the hills, and the stars light their
+     watch-fires, then will Yellow Vulture and his braves be at hand.
+     The scalp of the Paleface shall adorn the tepee of the Red Man.
+
+                               'WAH-WAH!'
+
+
+In order that there should be no possible mistake about the intention,
+the message was supplemented by a rude representation of the process of
+scalping, evidently the work of a practised hand.
+
+'Didn't I tell you we had something jolly to show you!' exclaimed Jack.
+
+But joy, or some equally powerful emotion, rendered the General
+incapable of speaking for several moments.
+
+
+
+
+ACT THE THIRD
+
+WHERE IS THE GENERAL?
+
+
+It was some little time before Clarence Tinling gave any opinion upon
+this bloodthirsty document. He turned exceedingly red, and examined it
+suspiciously on both sides. It seemed as if he did not altogether
+welcome this second opportunity for distinguishing himself. When he
+spoke it was with a sort of angry anxiety.
+
+'You think yourselves very clever, I dare say,' he said; 'but you
+needn't fancy you'll take me in! Come, you had better say so at
+once--you did this yourselves? It is not half bad--I will say that for
+it.'
+
+'That we didn't,' cried Guy. 'Why, just look at it, Tinling. Any one
+could see that it's an Indian's doing. No, it's all right; they really
+are coming.'
+
+'It's all skittles, I tell you,' said Clarence, still more angrily,
+though he was paler again now. 'What should Indians come here for?'
+
+'Well, he says why, there,' said Jack, 'and they came the other
+evening.'
+
+Clarence's colour rose again. 'That's different,' he said; 'I mean, it's
+not the same tribe.'
+
+'No, these are Black Bogallalas,' said Jack. 'What were the first ones,
+Tinling?'
+
+'I didn't ask them,' said the General shortly.
+
+'How many braves should you think Wah Na What's-his-name will bring?'
+asked Guy. 'As many as came the other evening? How many did come the
+first time?'
+
+'Do you think I had nothing better to do than count?' he retorted. 'Is
+there anything else you would like to know?'
+
+'Well, we'll hang out the lantern to-night, and watch how many come
+inside its rays,' said Jack, with a briskness which displeased his
+chief.
+
+'You wouldn't be quite so jolly cheerful over it if you knew what it was
+like!' he grumbled.
+
+'Why not?' said Guy. 'You beat the others easily enough by yourself, and
+we shall be three this time.'
+
+'Oh, it's all very fine to talk,' retorted the General; 'but we shall
+see what your mother and uncle say about it. They--they may think we
+ought not to take any notice of it.'
+
+Jack's eyes opened wide at this. 'Not take any notice of an attack by
+Black Bogallalas! I don't see how we can very well help noticing it!'
+
+'It all depends on what Mrs. Jolliffe says,' replied the conscientious
+General. 'I'm only a visitor here, and it wouldn't be the right thing
+for me to lead you into danger without leave.'
+
+'Well, you weren't so particular the first time the Indians came!'
+remarked Guy.
+
+'Will you shut up about that first time!' the Commander burst out, in
+exasperation; 'it's the second time now--that is, if it isn't all
+humbug. That's what I mean to find out first--you stay here till I come
+back, will you?'
+
+Taking the strip of bark with him, he went slowly up to the house. He
+had an uneasy feeling that the Indian's challenge was genuine enough,
+but he still hoped to have it pronounced a forgery. This may seem
+strange indeed to some, considering the courage of which he had already
+given proof, but I do not wish to make any further mystery, particularly
+as most of my readers will probably have already guessed the secret of
+this apparent contrast.
+
+The fact is, then, that Clarence Tinling had the best of reasons for
+being cool and courageous on the previous occasion. Those Indians were
+entirely imaginary; he had written the warning himself, and instructed
+the coachman's boy to throw it over the stockade; the attack on the fort
+and the brilliant victory were an afterthought.
+
+What had he done it for? That is rather difficult to explain--perhaps he
+hardly knew himself; he had a vague idea of proving to those
+disrespectful girls that enemies did exist, and that the protection of
+an Army was not to be despised.
+
+Then when he found himself alone in the camp, the temptation to carry
+his invention further was too much for him; and after Jack and Guy and
+Cecily, and even Uncle Lambert himself, accepted his story without
+hesitation, and treated him as a hero--why, it would have looked so
+silly to explain then, and so he went through with it.
+
+Lying is lying, whatever explanations and excuses may be made respecting
+it, and I am afraid it must be admitted that Tinling, if he began by a
+mere harmless device for giving a new turn to the game, ended by telling
+some very unmistakable lies.
+
+Now he found himself in a most delicate position: what if an attack by
+Red Indians should really be quite possible? Mr. Lambert Jolliffe had
+certainly not seemed to see anything incredible in the former visit,
+and, though Clarence had not a very high opinion of his abilities, he
+was grown up, and was not likely to be misinformed on such a point as
+that--at all events, he was the best person to consult just then. As he
+expected, he found him under the big ilex on his back, with his
+after-breakfast pipe, no longer alight, between his lips.
+
+'Mr. Jolliffe; I say, Mr. Jolliffe,' began Clarence.
+
+Lambert Jolliffe sat up, and fixed his glass in one drowsy eye. 'Hullo,
+Sir Garnet--I beg your pardon, Lord Wolseley, I mean. You ought to hear
+what they're saying at the War Office, I can tell you!'
+
+Praise is sweet, even when we do not deserve it, and Clarence felt a
+thrill of satisfaction at this somewhat vague tribute.
+
+'I wanted to ask you,' he said, 'should you say that Red Indians
+were--well, common in England?'
+
+'You have asked me a straightforward question, and I'll give you a
+straightforward answer,' was the reply. 'Till quite lately I should say
+they were absolutely unknown in this country.'
+
+Clarence's face brightened; he felt quite fond of Uncle Lambert, and
+began to think him a particularly well-informed and entertaining person.
+
+'Yes,' continued Uncle Lambert, thoughtfully, 'I must confess I thought
+it a little unlikely at first that you should have been annoyed by Red
+Indians; but, of course, when I remembered the Earl's Court Show, I saw
+at once that it was quite possible.' Clarence felt a cold qualm. He had,
+as we already know, seen Buffalo Bill's wonderful show, which, indeed,
+was responsible for much of his recent military enthusiasm. But till
+that moment, curiously enough, it had not occurred to him to connect the
+mysterious Wah Na Sa Pash Boo with the denizens of the Wild West whom he
+had seen careering about the immense arena at Earl's Court.
+
+'Do you mean,' he said, with an effort, 'that you thought some of
+Buffalo Bill's Indians had managed to _escape_?'
+
+'Well, I don't know any other way to account for such a thing. Do you?'
+
+Clarence did not answer this question directly: 'But,' he objected
+desperately, 'those were _converted_ Indians. They went to church, and
+the Lyceum, and all that!'
+
+Uncle Lambert shrugged his shoulders: 'Once an Indian always an
+Indian!' he said. 'They must have their fling now and then, I suppose,
+and then the old Adam crops up. And you see,' he added, 'it cropped up
+in that attack on you the other night. Fortunately for us, and indeed
+for the whole country, you were prepared for them--otherwise no one can
+tell what horrors we might not have seen.'
+
+'We may--we may see them yet!' said the hero, gloomily. 'Just look at
+this, Mr. Jolliffe.'
+
+Lambert took the bark from him, and read it with a thoughtful frown. At
+last he said:
+
+'Well, I rather expected something of this sort when I saw you posting
+up all those insulting notices--Indians are so confoundedly touchy, you
+know.'
+
+'You might have said that at the time, then!' exclaimed the General
+reproachfully.
+
+Lambert lifted his eyebrows.
+
+'My dear chap, I thought you knew. Wasn't that what you were all driving
+at?'
+
+'Not me,' said Clarence. 'I was against it from the first. I told them
+it was caddish to insult a fallen foe, but they would go and stick up
+those _beastly_ notices.'
+
+'All's well that ends well, eh? You've got a rise out of 'em this time.
+I congratulate you, my boy, on getting the chance of a second brush with
+the Indians. And this time you'll have the army with you.'
+
+'A lot of good they are!' said Clarence, in a muffled voice.
+
+'Come, it's not good form for a General to run down his troops; but you
+heroes are always so modest. I'll be bound, now, you've determined not
+to mention this in the house till the danger is passed?'
+
+'No, I haven't, though. I shall mention it, most likely. Why not?'
+
+'To save them useless anxiety. Because, unless I am wrong, you see cause
+to apprehend (I must ask you not to conceal anything from me)--to
+apprehend that this will be a more serious affair than the last?'
+
+'Yes, I do,' replied the General, promptly, 'a good deal.'
+
+'I feared as much,' said Uncle Lambert, with a very grave face. 'But in
+that case, isn't it as well not to terrify my sister and those poor
+girls unnecessarily?'
+
+'I don't see that. Mrs. Jolliffe might think we ought to be guarding the
+inside of the house.'
+
+'Oh,' said Uncle Lambert, 'but I should object to that strongly. You see
+it's very plain that it's _you_ the Yellow Vulture's after. He won't
+think of coming near the house unless you're in it, and then what will
+become of us all?'
+
+'You'll take care you don't get mixed up in it, I can see,' said
+Tinling, savagely.
+
+'I shall take very good care indeed. Oh, but you must make allowances
+for me, my boy. Remember, I've not been in military training for days
+and days, as you have.'
+
+'If that's all, I could get you up in the drill in half-an-hour,'
+proposed Tinling, eagerly.
+
+'Thanks, but I have a better reason still. Tastes differ so much. You
+like to spend your evenings in beating off wild Indians from a stockade.
+Now, I prefer a plain, comfortable dinner, and a quiet cigar. I'm not
+sure that your way isn't the manlier of the two--but it's not nearly so
+much in my line.'
+
+'Why don't you say you're a funk, and have done with it?' Tinling said
+rudely.
+
+'My dear young friend,' was the placid answer, 'if Providence has
+endowed you with a meed of personal courage beyond that of others, it is
+ungraceful to taunt those who are less fortunate. While I am by no means
+prepared to admit that I am what you so pleasingly term "a funk," I
+readily allow that----'
+
+But Tinling did not stay to hear any more; he turned on his heel with an
+anger that had a spice of envy in it. Why, why had not he been content
+with an ordinary reputation, instead of one that he must sustain now at
+all hazards? He could deceive himself no longer; his foolish vanity,
+which had allowed the army to post those rash defiances, had brought
+down some real Red Indians upon him, and he was horribly afraid.
+
+As he walked restlessly down the path, a veil seemed drawn across the
+brilliant sky, the dahlias and 'red-hot pokers' and gladioli in the beds
+burnt with a sinister glow, the smell of the sweet peas and mignonette
+seemed oppressive, the bees droning about the lavender patches had a
+note of warning in their buzz, he felt chilly in the shade and sick in
+the sun.
+
+He saw nothing for it but fighting, but the idea of facing a horde of
+howling savages with only two boys younger than himself was too
+appalling; he must engage recruits, grown-up ones, and with this
+intention he went to the stable-yard, where he found Chinnock, the
+coachman, sluicing the carriage-wheels.
+
+'Chinnock,' he began, with an attempt to seem casual and careless,
+'we're going to be attacked by Red Indians again to-night.'
+
+Chinnock touched a sandy forelock, as he raised his red grinning face.
+
+'Lor', sir, be you indeed? Well, you young genl'men du have rare goings
+on down in the paddock, that you du.'
+
+'It's--it's real Red Indians this time, Chinnock--B--black Bogallalas!'
+
+Chinnock had deliberately moved to the harness-room, and Tinling had to
+repeat his information.
+
+'Ah, indeed, sir! Red Injians? Well, to think o' that!' he said
+cheerfully, as if he was humouring some rather childish remark.
+
+'But we shall want every available man; do you think you can spare time
+to come and help?'
+
+''Bout what time, sir?' said Chinnock.
+
+'About nine--half-past eight, say. Do try.'
+
+'Can't come as late as that, nohow, sir. That's my supper-hour, that
+is. If the mistress don't want the carriage to-day, I dessay I could
+step down 'bout five for half-an-hour or so, if that would suit.'
+
+'That wouldn't be any use at all, Chinnock; we shan't begin till dark.'
+
+'Then I'm afraid I can't be of no sarvice to 'ee, sir.'
+
+The poor General turned away: evidently the coachman had no intention of
+risking his life. He remembered Joe, the gardener's boy and
+stable-help--he was better than no one. Joe was rolling the
+tennis-court, and grinned sheepishly on being pressed to join.
+
+'Noa, sur,' he said, 'it doan't lay in my work fur to fight no Injins. I
+see one onst at Reading Vair, I did, a nippin' about he wur, and a
+roarin'! I bain't goin' to hev naught to do with the likes o' he!'
+
+Tinling saw only one hope left. If he could see Mrs. Jolliffe and tell
+her of the danger which threatened him, she might refuse permission to
+fight at all, or, at the very least, she would see that he had proper
+assistance. So into the house he went, and the first person he found was
+Hazel, who was knitting her pretty forehead over the Latin exercise
+which had been given her as a holiday task.
+
+'I say, Hazel,' he said, with a trembling voice; but she interrupted
+him:
+
+'Oh, perhaps you can help me. What's the Latin for "Balbus says it is
+all over with the General"?'
+
+He shivered; it sounded so like an omen. 'No, but Hazel, listen,' he
+said; 'the Indians are coming again to-night.'
+
+'If you're not going to talk sensibly,' said Hazel, 'go out this
+instant.'
+
+He saw she was utterly unsympathetic, and he wandered on to the hall,
+which was used as a morning-room, where Hilary sat painting a pansy, and
+he broke the news to her in much the same words. She actually laughed,
+and she had been almost as frightened as Cecily when he had told her of
+the other Indians.
+
+'You are too killing over those Red Indians!' she said. Privately, he
+thought that the Red Indians would do all the killing.
+
+'You needn't laugh; it's true!' he said solemnly.
+
+'Oh, of course!' said Hilary; 'but don't come so near, or you'll upset
+my glass of water.' Hilary, too, was hopeless; he was reduced to his
+last cards now, and came in upon Mrs. Jolliffe as she sat at her
+writing-table. She looked up with a sweet, vague smile.
+
+'What is it now, dear boy?' she asked. 'I hope you are managing to amuse
+yourself.'
+
+'I think I ought to tell you,' he said thickly, 'that a tribe of
+Bogallala Indians are going to storm our encampment this evening.'
+
+Perhaps Mrs. Jolliffe was getting a little bored with military topics.
+'Yes, yes,' she said absently, 'that will be very nice, I'm sure. Don't
+be too late in coming in, there's good boys.'
+
+'You don't _mind_ our being there?--there will be danger!' he said with
+meaning.
+
+'Mind? Not in the very least, so long as you are enjoying yourself,' she
+said kindly.
+
+There went one card: he had but one more. 'Could you let Corklett and
+George' (they were the butler and page respectively) 'come down to the
+camp about half-past eight? We should be so much safer if we had them
+with us.'
+
+'What are you thinking of, Clarence? We dine at eight, remember; how can
+I send either of them down then? You really must be reasonable.'
+
+Clarence was by no means an ill-mannered boy in general, but fear made
+him insolent at this.
+
+'Of course, if you think your dinner is more important than us!' he
+burst out hotly.
+
+'Clarence, I can't allow you to speak to me in that way. It is
+ridiculous for you to expect me to alter my arrangements to suit your
+convenience,' said Mrs. Jolliffe; 'leave the room, or I shall be really
+angry with you. I don't wish to hear any more--go.'
+
+He went with a swelling heart, and in the garden he met Cecily. If he
+could only induce her to beg him not to risk his life again! He
+disclosed the situation as impressively as he could; but, alas! Cecily
+seemed perfectly tranquil.
+
+'I'm not a bit afraid this time,' she said, 'because you beat them so
+easily before; there's only one thing, Clarence. You know I daren't lock
+the army in again--they've made it up; but they _were_ so cross over it!
+So I want you to promise to look after them.'
+
+'I shall have enough to do to look after myself, I expect,' he answered
+roughly; 'you don't know what these Indians are.'
+
+'Oh, but I do, Clarence; I saw them at the "Wild West." I thought they
+looked rather nice then. And you know you frightened them so before. You
+are so awfully brave--aren't you?'
+
+'I--I don't think I feel quite so awfully brave as I did then,' he
+admitted.
+
+'Ah, but you will. Jack and Guy will be quite safe with you. Good-bye;
+I'm going to get some mulberry-leaves for my silkworms.' And she ran off
+cheerfully.
+
+It was his hard fate that everybody persisted in treating the affair in
+one of two ways--either they looked upon it as part of the army game, or
+else considered him such a champion, on the strength of his past
+exploits, that there was practically no danger even if a whole tribe of
+Redskins came to attack him.
+
+Luncheon that day was a terrible meal for him. Uncle Lambert (though he
+was too great a coward to go near the fight himself) seemed very anxious
+that the defenders should be in good condition. 'Give yourself a
+chance, General,' he would say; 'another slice of this roly-poly pudding
+may just turn the scale between you and Yellow Vulture. Look at the
+army--they're victualling for a regular siege!'
+
+But Clarence was quite unable to follow their example; he was annoyed
+with them for what he considered was 'showing off'--though he might have
+reflected that to consume three helpings of jam-and-suet in rapid
+succession was an almost impossible form of bravado.
+
+The rest of the afternoon he spent in trying to lower the army's
+confidence by telling all the gruesome stories of Indian warfare he
+could think of; but he frightened himself a great deal more than them,
+and at last had to abandon the attempt in despair.
+
+For Jack and Guy had no nerves to speak of; they were eager to clear
+their tarnished reputation, and the possibility of harm coming to them
+did not seem to present itself. They had formed rather a poor opinion of
+Buffalo Bill's Indians, whose yell turned out to be very little more
+than short yelps, and who ran away directly a Cowboy showed his nose.
+Hadn't Clarence defeated them with ease already? What Clarence had done
+alone they surely could do together, and then they had an unbounded
+belief in the impregnable character of their stockade.
+
+Tinling found that he could not undeceive them without exposing himself,
+which he would still rather die than do, and he roamed about the
+grounds, making a little mental calculation whenever a clock struck in
+the heavy afternoon stillness: 'In so many hours from this I shall be
+fighting hand-to-hand with real Indians!'
+
+Then at tea-time he thought (for the first time) the smell of cake quite
+detestable, and he hardly knew how he forced himself to sit quietly on
+his chair.
+
+'General Tinling,' said Uncle Lambert, 'before you, so to speak, "go to
+the front" and occupy the post of danger, will you oblige me by drawing
+up the troops before the verandah? I should like, though unable to
+accompany you myself, to say a few words of farewell.'
+
+Clarence sulkily acquiesced, and Lambert Jolliffe addressed the army:
+'Soldiers,' he said, 'a great responsibility rests upon you this day.
+You are expected solemnly and earnestly to strive your utmost _not_ to
+
+
+     Let the red man dance
+     By _our_ red cedar tree,
+
+
+to quote (with a trifling variation) from Tennyson's "Maud." For myself,
+I have no fears of the result. Under the leadership of your veteran
+General, victory must infallibly crown your arms. We peaceful civilians
+shall rest secure in the absolute confidence such protection inspires,
+and be the first to welcome your triumphant return. Should your hearts
+fail you at any moment, I have already instructed you how to act. To
+the Commander himself I should consider the mere suggestion an
+impertinence. Go, then, devoted spirits, where Glory leads, and
+endeavour to avoid the indignity of scalping--if only for the sake of
+appearances. Soldiers, I have done. May the God of Battles (I need
+hardly explain to scholars that I refer to Mars) keep his eye on you!'
+
+Hazel and Hilary were also on the verandah, and used their handkerchiefs
+freely--but principally to conceal their mouths. 'They'll be sorry they
+laughed by-and-by;' thought Clarence; 'they'll wish they had cried just
+a little, perhaps!'--a reflection the pathos of which very nearly made
+him cry himself, as he marched down to the stockade, feeling distinctly
+unwell.
+
+Before he entered the fort he tore down the fatal notices. 'What's the
+good of that?' asked Guy.
+
+'Well, the Indians have seen 'em,' said the General.
+
+'But they'll think we want to back out of it,' objected Jack.
+
+'Let them think!' was the bold retort.
+
+Inside the fort Jack and Guy set to work in the highest spirits to
+barricade the entrance with wheelbarrows and an old mowing-machine; then
+they lit the lantern, and polished their guns, sharpened their swords,
+and looked to the springs of their pistols for about the hundredth time.
+
+'I say, this would jolly well pepper a Red Indian, wouldn't it!' cried
+Guy, showing a pistol, the tiny barrel of which was constructed to
+discharge swanshot with a steel watch-spring.
+
+'I tell you what,' said Jack, with the air of a trapper, 'I shall
+reserve my peas till I've fired away all the corks, and take a
+deliberate aim each time.'
+
+It was impossible to persuade them that these missiles would not be
+accepted as deadly by savages, who of course would know no better; and
+again, had not the first victory been won by these simple means?
+
+So General Tinling held his peace, and the western sky slowly changed
+from crocus to green, and from green to deep violet, and the evening
+star lighted its steady golden fire, the grasshoppers set up a louder
+chirp, a bat executed complicated figures overhead, and the boys
+unconsciously began to speak in whispers.
+
+'It's getting too dark to see much with this telescope,' said Jack, 'I
+wish we had a night-glass. The Indians ought to be here by this
+time--they said "sunset," didn't they? If I _was_ a Red Indian I would
+be punctual! When do you suppose they'll come, Clarence--soon?'
+
+'How on earth do I know?' snapped the General from within the tent.
+
+'Well, you needn't get in a bait over it. How did they come on the first
+time--did they crawl along like snakes till they were quite near, and
+then give a yell and rush at the stockade?'
+
+'I forget what they did--don't bother me!'
+
+'I suppose they'll all have tomahawks,' said Guy. 'Clarence, does
+scalping hurt?'
+
+There was a slight convulsion inside the tent, but no answer.
+
+'I wonder if the Bogallala torture prisoners,' Jack observed; 'I don't
+think I could stand _that_.'
+
+The General came to the tent-door at this: 'Can't you fellows shut up?'
+he said fiercely. 'They'll hear you!'
+
+'They're not here yet--we shall know when they come, by the
+signalling--let's all keep quite quiet for a minute or two.'
+
+There was a breathless interval of silence. At last Jack said: 'I hear
+something--a sort of low grunting noise, like pigs.'
+
+'Perhaps it is the pigs at the farm,' suggested Guy.
+
+'Indians can imitate all kinds of birds, I know,' reasoned Jack, not
+directly to the point, perhaps, but he was getting excited.
+
+Tinling felt a dull rage against the other two. How dared they pretend
+not to be afraid? It was all swagger--he knew that very well. Various
+unpleasant recollections began to rise in his mind. He remembered how
+that Indian spy had stalked the settler's cabin at Earl's Court. He
+could see him now, stealing over the sand, then listening with his ear
+to the ground, and turning to beckon on the ambushed warriors. He even
+remembered the way the yellow and red striped blinds of the log hut
+flapped in the wind, and how the horse that was hobbled outside raised
+his head from his hay, and pricked his ears uneasily, as the foe came
+gliding nearer and nearer. Then their way of fighting--he had thought it
+rather comic _then_--they hopped and pranced about like so many lively
+frogs, but the butchery would not be rendered any more agreeable by
+being accompanied by laughable gestures! And there was an almost naked
+light-yellow savage, whom he recalled dancing the war dance--he tried
+not to think of all this, but it came vividly before him.
+
+'S-s-h--_Cave_!' cried Guy, suddenly, as he looked through the loophole;
+'I can see just the top of one's head and feathers among the currant
+bushes. I'll touch him up in a second.'
+
+He raised his tiny spring pistol, and was just aiming, when Tinling,
+almost beside himself, darted on him, and struck it out of his hand.
+'What are you doing now?' he said, through his teeth. 'What is the good
+of _irritating_ them?'
+
+'Why, they _are_ irritated,' said Guy, 'or they wouldn't come.'
+
+'If they are,' retorted Clarence, raising his voice, 'whose doing was
+it? You can't say I had anything to do with putting up those defiances!
+Haven't I always said I respected Red men? They've got feelings like us.
+When you go and insult them, of course they get annoyed--who wouldn't, I
+should like to know? I honour a chief like Yellow Vulture myself, and I
+don't care if he hears me say so. I say I honour him!'
+
+His voice rose almost to a scream as he concluded.
+
+'I say, Tinling, I do believe you're in a funk!' said Guy, after a
+moment of wondering silence.
+
+'If you are, say so, and we shall know what to do,' added Jack, feeling
+in his pocket. 'Are you?'
+
+'Feel his hands,' suggested Guy.
+
+'Look here,' said Clarence, dashing aside the obstacles before the door,
+'I'm not going to stay here to be treated in this way. If it hadn't been
+for your foolery in sticking up the notices we should have been friends
+with the Indians now. I don't want to quarrel with any Bogallala. And
+you have the cheek to ask me if I'm in a funk, and to want to feel my
+hands. Well, it just serves you right--I'm going.'
+
+'Well, go then; who wants you?' said Guy.
+
+But softer-hearted Jack said, 'Clarence, you mustn't. You'll be safe in
+here; but out there----'
+
+But the General had already vanished. He was crouching outside in the
+shadow of the stockade. He could not bear being penned up any longer; he
+must at least have a run for his life.
+
+Had the enemy heard him declare his innocence? If so, it did not seem to
+have softened them. They were still crouching--silent, hidden,
+relentless--behind the currant bushes, their scouts signalling to one
+another, for no _real_ grasshopper ever made so much noise as that. He
+must make a bolt for it, and take his chance of their arrows missing
+him. Over the open space of grey-green grass he scuttled, and actually
+succeeded in reaching the friendly shadow of the holly hedge unharmed;
+but that was probably because they felt so certain of cutting him off at
+their pleasure.
+
+On tiptoe and trembling went the General along the narrow paths, green
+with damp, and latticed by the shadows which branches cast in the sickly
+moonlight, until--just when he was almost clear of the gloom--his knees
+bent under him; for there, at the end of the walk, against the starry
+sky, stood a towering figure, with bristling feather head-dress, and
+tomahawk poised.
+
+'Oh, please, sir, don't!' he faltered, and shut his eyes, expecting the
+Indian to bound upon him. But when he opened his eyes again, the savage
+was gone! He must have slipped behind a ragged old yew which had once
+been clipped and trimmed to look like a chess-king.
+
+Clarence Tinling tottered on through the shrubbery, which was full of
+terrors. Warriors, stealthy and cruel, lurked behind every rustling
+laurel; far away on the lawn he saw their spears through the tall pampas
+grass; he heard them chirping, clucking, and grunting in every direction
+as they lay in wait for him, until at last he gained the broad gravel
+path, at the end of which--oh, how far away they seemed!--were the
+three lighted windows of the drawing-room. He could see the interior
+quite plainly, and the group round the piano where the shaded lamp made
+a spot of brilliant colour. What were they all doing? Were they huddled
+together, waiting, watching in an agony of suspense? Nothing of the
+kind: it will be scarcely credited, perhaps, but this heartless domestic
+circle were positively passing the time with music, as if nothing were
+happening!
+
+If only he could reach that bright drawing-room before the rush came! He
+felt that there were lithe forms stealing along behind the flower-beds.
+He dared not run, but dragged his heavy feet along the gravel; and then,
+all at once, from the rhododendron bushes rose a wild, unearthly yell.
+He could bear it no longer; he would make one last effort, even if they
+tomahawked him on the very verandah.
+
+Somehow--he never knew how--he found himself in the midst of that quiet
+musical party, wild with terror, scarcely able to speak.
+
+'The Red Indians!' he gasped. 'Don't let them get me! Save me--hide me
+somewhere!' and he remembered afterwards that he made a mad endeavour to
+get inside the piano.
+
+He was instantly surrounded by the astonished family. 'My dear
+Clarence,' said Mrs. Jolliffe, 'you're perfectly safe--you've been
+frightening yourself with your own game. There are no Indians here.'
+
+Another howl from the shrubbery seemed to contradict her. 'There,
+didn't you hear that?' he cried. 'Oh, you won't believe me till it's too
+late! There are hundreds of them round the stockade. They may have
+scalped Jack and Guy by this time!'
+
+'And why ain't you being scalped too?' inquired Uncle Lambert.
+
+'I'm sure you needn't talk!' he retorted; 'you weren't any more anxious
+to fight than I am.'
+
+'But isn't that different? I thought you had fought them before, and
+conquered?'
+
+'Then you thought wrong! Those--those weren't real Indians--I made them
+up, then!'
+
+'Now we've got it!' said Uncle Lambert. 'Well, Master Clarence, you've
+made your little confession, and now it's my turn--_I_ made Yellow
+Vulture up!'
+
+'Are you sure--really sure--on your honour?' he asked eagerly.
+
+'Honest Injun!' said Lambert. 'You see, I began to think the military
+business was getting rather overdone; the army, like Wordsworth's world,
+was "too much with us," and it occurred to me to see whether the
+General's courage would stand an outside test--so I composed that little
+challenge. Yes, you see before you the only Wah Na Sa Pash Boo--no
+others are genuine!'
+
+Tinling felt that those girls were laughing at him; they had probably
+been in the secret for some time; but he could not care much just
+then--the relief was so delicious!
+
+'It was too bad of you, Lambert,' said Mrs. Jolliffe. 'He was really
+horribly frightened, and there are those other two down in the stockade
+all alone--you might have thought of that--they will be half out of
+their minds by this time!'
+
+'My dear Cecilia,' was the reply,'don't be uneasy, I _did_ think of it.
+The moment they begin to feel at all uncomfortable they have directions
+to open a certain packet which explains the whole thing. If the gallant
+General had not been in quite such a hurry, he would have spared himself
+this unpleasant experience.'
+
+'Let's all go down, and see how they're getting on,' said Hazel.
+
+'I know this,' said the General sullenly, 'they were in quite as big a
+funk as I was!'
+
+'Then why didn't they run in, and ask to be hidden too?' inquired
+Hilary.
+
+'Why? Because they didn't dare!' retorted Tinling, boldly.
+
+'You know,' he remarked to Cecily, as they were going down together
+through the warm darkness, 'it's not fair of your uncle to play these
+tricks on fellows.'
+
+'Perhaps it isn't quite,' said Cecily, impartially; 'but then he didn't
+_begin_, did he?'
+
+'Ahoy!' shouted Uncle Lambert, as they neared the stockade, and he was
+answered by a ringing cheer from the fortress.
+
+'Come on--we ain't afraid of you! Don't skulk there--see what you'll
+get!' And a volley of peas, corks, and small shot flew about their ears.
+
+Lambert Jolliffe ran forward: 'Hi, stop that! spare our lives!' he
+cried, laughing. 'Jack, you young rascal, put down that confounded
+popgun--can't you see we're not Red Indians?'
+
+'What, is it you, uncle?' said Guy, in a rather crestfallen tone. 'Where
+are the Red Indians then?'
+
+'They had to go up to town to see their dentist. But do you mean to say
+you haven't opened my envelope after all?'
+
+'I thought you told us it was only in case we got frightened?' said
+Jack.
+
+'What does the General say to _that_?' cried Lambert--but Clarence
+Tinling was nowhere to be found. He had slipped off to his bedroom, and
+the next morning he announced at breakfast that he 'thought his people
+would be wanting him at home.'
+
+So the army was disbanded, for there was a general disarmament, and on
+the afternoon after Tinling's departure the entire Jolliffe family
+engaged in a grand cricket match, when lazy Uncle Lambert came out
+unexpectedly strong as an overhand bowler.
+
+
+
+
+_SHUT OUT_
+
+
+It is towards the end of an afternoon in December, and Wilfred Rolleston
+is walking along a crowded London street with his face turned westward.
+A few moments ago and he was scarcely conscious of where he was or where
+he meant to go: he was walking on mechanically in a heavy stupor,
+through which there stole a haunting sense of degradation and despair
+that tortured him dully. And suddenly, as if by magic, this has
+vanished: he seems to himself to have waked from a miserable day dream
+to the buoyant consciousness of youth and hope. Temperaments which are
+subject to fits of heavy and causeless depression have their
+compensations sometimes in the reaction which follows; the infesting
+cares, as in Longfellow's poem, 'fold their tents, like the Arabs, and
+as silently steal away,' and with their retreat comes an exquisite
+exhilaration which more equable dispositions can never experience.
+
+Is this so with Rolleston now? He only knows that the cloud has lifted
+from his brain, and that in the clear sunshine which bursts upon him now
+he can look his sorrows in the face and know that there is nothing so
+terrible in them after all.
+
+It is true that he is not happy at the big City day school which he has
+just left. How should he be? He is dull and crabbed and uncouth, and
+knows too well that he is an object of general dislike; no one there
+cares to associate with him, and he makes no attempt to overcome their
+prejudices, being perfectly aware that they are different from him, and
+hating them for it, but hating himself, perhaps, the most.
+
+And though all his evenings are spent at home there is little rest for
+him even there, for the work for the next day must be prepared; and he
+sits over it till late, sometimes with desperate efforts to master the
+difficulties, but more often staring at the page before him with eyes
+that are almost wilfully vacant.
+
+All this has been and is enough in itself to account for the gloomy
+state into which he had sunk. But--and how could he have forgotten
+it?--it is over for the present.
+
+To-night he will not have to sit up struggling with the tasks which will
+only cover him with fresh disgrace on the morrow; for a whole month he
+need not think of them, nor of the classes in which the hand of everyone
+is against him. For the holidays have begun; to-day has been the last of
+the term. Is there no reason for joy and thankfulness in that? What a
+fool he has been to let those black thoughts gain such a hold over him!
+
+Slowly, more as if it had all happened a long time ago instead of quite
+recently, the incidents of the morning come back to him, vivid and clear
+once more--morning chapel and the Doctor's sermon, and afterwards the
+pretence of work and relaxed discipline in the class rooms, when the
+results of the examinations had been read out, with the names of the
+boys who had gained prizes and their remove to the form above. He had
+come out last of course, but no one expected anything else from him; a
+laugh had gone round the desks when his humble total closed the list,
+and he had joined in it to show them he didn't care. And then the class
+had been dismissed, and there had been friendly good-byes, arrangements
+for walking home in company or for meeting during the holidays--for all
+but him; he had gone out alone--and the dull blankness had come over him
+from which he has only just recovered.
+
+But, for the present at all events, he has got rid of it completely; he
+is going home, where at least he is not despised, where he will find a
+sanctuary from gibes and jostlings and impositions; and the longer he
+thinks of this the higher his spirits rise, and he steps briskly, with a
+kind of exultation, until the people he passes in the streets turn and
+look at him, struck by his expression. 'They can see how jolly I'm
+feeling,' he thinks with a smile.
+
+The dusk is falling, and the shops he passes are brilliant with lights
+and decorations, but he does not stop to look at any of them; his mind
+is busy with settling how he shall employ himself on this the first
+evening of his liberty, the first for so long on which he could feel his
+own master.
+
+At first he decides to read. Is there not some book he had begun and
+meant to finish, so many days ago now that he has even forgotten what it
+was all about, and only remembers that it was exciting?
+
+And yet, he thinks, he won't read to-night--not on the very first night
+of the holidays. Quite lately--yesterday or the day before--his mother
+had spoken to him, gently but very seriously, about what she called the
+morose and savage fits which would bring misery upon him if he did not
+set himself earnestly to overcome them.
+
+And there were times, he knew, when it seemed as if a demon possessed
+him and drove him to wound even those who loved him and whom he
+loved--times when their affection only roused in him some hideous spirit
+of sullen contradiction.
+
+He feels softened now somehow, and has a new longing for the love he has
+so often harshly repulsed. He _will_ overcome this sulkiness of his; he
+will begin this very evening; as soon as he gets home he will tell his
+mother that he is sorry, that he does love her really, only that when
+these fits come on him he hardly knows what he says or does.
+
+And she will forgive him, only too gladly; and his mind will be quite at
+ease again. No, not quite; there is still something he must do before
+that: he has a vague recollection of a long-standing coolness between
+himself and his younger brother, Lionel. They never have got on very
+well together; Lionel is so different--much cleverer even already, for
+one thing; better looking too, and better tempered. Whatever they
+quarrelled about Wilfred is very sure that he was the offender; Lionel
+never begins that kind of thing. But he will put himself in the right at
+once, and ask Lionel to make friends again; he will consent readily
+enough--he always does.
+
+And then he has a bright idea: he will take his brother some little
+present to prove that he really wishes to behave decently for the
+future. What shall he buy?
+
+He finds himself near a large toy shop at the time, and in the window
+are displayed several regiments of brightly coloured tin warriors--the
+very thing! Lionel is still young enough to delight in them.
+
+Feeling in his pockets, Rolleston discovers more loose silver than he
+had thought he possessed, and so he goes into the shop and asks for one
+of the boxes of soldiers. He is served by one of two neatly dressed
+female assistants, who stare and giggle at one another at his first
+words, finding it odd, perhaps, that a fellow of his age should buy
+toys--as if, he thinks indignantly, they couldn't see that it was not
+for _himself_ he wanted the things.
+
+But he goes on, feeling happier after his purchase. They will see now
+that he is not so bad after all. It is long since he has felt such a
+craving to be thought well of by somebody.
+
+A little farther on he comes to a row of people, mostly women and
+tradesmen's boys, standing on the curb stone opposite a man who is
+seated in a little wooden box on wheels drawn up close to the pavement.
+He is paralytic and blind, with a pinched white face framed in an
+old-fashioned fur cap with big ear lappets; he seems to be preaching or
+reading, and Rolleston stops idly enough to listen for a few moments,
+the women making room for him with alacrity, and the boys staring
+curiously round at the new arrival with a grin.
+
+He hardly pays much attention to this; he is listening to the poem which
+the man in the box is reciting with a nasal and metallic snuffle in his
+voice:
+
+
+     There's a harp _and_ a crown,
+       For you and _for_ me,
+     Hanging on the boughs
+       Of that Christmas tree!
+
+
+He hears, and then hurries on again, repeating the stanza mechanically
+to himself, without seeing anything particularly ludicrous about it. The
+words have reminded him of that Christmas party at the Gordons', next
+door. Did not Ethel Gordon ask him particularly to come, and did he not
+refuse her sullenly? What a brute he was to treat her like that! If she
+were to ask him again, he thinks he would not say no, though he does
+hate parties.
+
+Ethel is a dear girl, and never seems to think him good-for-nothing, as
+most people do. Perhaps it is sham though--no, he can't think that when
+he remembers how patiently and kindly she has borne with his senseless
+fits of temper and tried to laugh away his gloom.
+
+Not every girl as pretty as Ethel is would care to notice him, and
+persist in it in spite of everything; yet he has sulked with her of
+late. Was it because she had favoured Lionel? He is ashamed to think
+that this may have been the reason.
+
+Never mind, that is all over now; he will start clear with everybody. He
+will ask Ethel, too, to forgive him. Is there nothing he can do to
+please her? Yes some time ago she had asked him to draw something for
+her. (He detests drawing lessons, but he has rather a taste for drawing
+things out of his own head.) He had told her, not too civilly, that he
+had work enough without doing drawings for girls. He will paint her
+something to-night as a surprise; he will begin as soon as tea is
+cleared away; it will be more sociable than reading a book.
+
+And then already he sees a vision of the warm little panelled room, and
+himself getting out his colour-box and sitting down to paint by
+lamp-light--for any light does for his kind of colouring--while his
+mother sits opposite and Lionel watches the picture growing under his
+hand.
+
+What shall he draw? He gets quite absorbed in thinking over this; his
+own tastes run in a gory direction, but perhaps Ethel, being a girl, may
+not care for battles or desperate duels. A compromise strikes him; he
+will draw a pirate ship: that will be first rate, with the black flag
+flying on the mainmast, and the pirate captain on the poop scouring the
+ocean with a big glass in search of merchantmen; all about the deck and
+rigging he can put the crew, with red caps, and belts stuck full of
+pistols and daggers.
+
+And on the right there shall be a bit of the pirate island, with a mast
+and another black flag--he knows he will enjoy picking out the skull and
+cross-bones in thick Chinese white--and then, if there is room, he will
+add a cannon, and perhaps a palm tree. A pirate island always has palm
+trees.
+
+He is so full of this projected picture of his that he is quite
+surprised to find that he is very near the square where he lives; but
+here, just in front of him, at the end of the narrow lane, is the
+public-house with the coach and four engraved on the ground glass of the
+lower part of the window, and above it the bottles full of coloured
+water.
+
+And here is the greengrocer's. How long is it since it was a
+barber's?--surely a very little time. And there is the bootmaker's, with
+its outside display of dangling shoes, and the row of naked gas jets
+blown to pale blue specks and whistling red tongues by turns as a gust
+sweeps across them.
+
+This is his home, this little dingy, old-fashioned red-brick house at an
+angle of the square, with a small paved space railed in before it. He
+pushes open the old gate with the iron arch above, where an oil-lamp
+used to hang, and hurries up to the door with the heavy shell-shaped
+porch, impatient to get to the warmth and light which await him within.
+
+The bell has got out of order, for only a faint jangle comes from below
+as he rings; he waits a little and then pulls the handle again, more
+sharply this time, and still no one comes.
+
+When Betty does think proper to come up and open the door he will tell
+her that it is too bad keeping a fellow standing out here, in the fog
+and cold, all this time.... She is coming at last--no, it was fancy; it
+seems as if Betty had slipped out for something, and perhaps the cook is
+upstairs, and his mother may be dozing by the fire, as she has begun to
+do of late.
+
+Losing all patience, he gropes for the knocker, and, groping in vain,
+begins to hammer with bare fists on the door, louder and louder, until
+he is interrupted by a rough voice from the railings behind him.
+
+'Now then, what are you up to there, eh?' says the voice, which belongs
+to a burly policeman who has stopped suspiciously on the pavement.
+
+'Why,' says Rolleston, 'I want to get in, and I can't make them hear me.
+I wish you'd try what you can do, will you?'
+
+The policeman comes slowly in to the gate. 'I dessay,' he says
+jocularly. 'Is there anythink else? Come, suppose you move on.'
+
+A curious kind of dread of he knows not what begins to creep over
+Wilfred at this.
+
+'Move on?' he cries, '_why_ should I move on? This is my house; don't
+you see? I live here.'
+
+'Now look 'ere, my joker, I don't want a job over this,' says the
+constable, stolidly. 'You'll bring a crowd round in another minute if
+you keep on that 'ammering.'
+
+'Mind your own business,' says the other with growing excitement.
+
+'That's what you'll make me do if you don't look out,' is the retort.
+'Will you move on before I make you?'
+
+'But, I say,' protests Rolleston, 'I'm not joking; I give you my word
+I'm not. I do live here. Why, I've just come back from school, and I
+can't get in.'
+
+'Pretty school _you_ come from!' growls the policeman; ''andles on to
+_your_ lesson books, if _I_ knows anything. 'Ere, out you go!'
+
+Rolleston's fear increases. 'I won't! I won't!' he cries frantically,
+and rushing back to the door beats upon it wildly. On the other side of
+it are love and shelter, and it will not open to him. He is cold and
+hungry and tired after his walk; why do they keep him out like this?
+
+'Mother!' he calls hoarsely. 'Can't you hear me, mother? It's Wilfred;
+let me in!'
+
+The other takes him, not roughly, by the shoulder. 'Now you take my
+advice,' he says. 'You ain't quite yourself; you're making a mistake. I
+don't want to get you in trouble if you don't force me to it. Drop this
+'ere tomfool game and go home quiet to wherever it is you _do_ live.'
+
+'I tell you I live here, you fool!' shrieks Wilfred, in deadly terror
+lest he should be forced away before the door is opened.
+
+'And I tell you you don't do nothing of the sort,' says the policeman,
+beginning to lose his temper. 'No one don't live 'ere, nor ain't done
+not since I've bin on the beat. Use your eyes if you're not too far
+gone.'
+
+For the first time Rolleston seems to see things plainly as they are; he
+glances round the square--that is just as it always is on foggy winter
+evenings, with its central enclosure a shadowy black patch against a
+reddish glimmer, beyond which the lighted windows of the houses make
+yellow bars of varying length and tint.
+
+But this house, his own--why, it is all shuttered and dark; some of the
+window panes are broken; there is a pale grey patch in one that looks
+like a dingy bill; the knocker has been unscrewed from the door, and on
+its scraped panels someone has scribbled words and rough caricatures
+that were surely not there when he left that morning.
+
+Can anything--any frightful disaster--have come in that short time? No,
+he will not think of it; he will not let himself be terrified, all for
+nothing.
+
+'Now, are you goin'?' says the policeman after a pause.
+
+Rolleston puts his back against the door and clings to the sides. 'No!'
+he shouts. 'I don't care what you say; I don't believe you: they are all
+in there--they are, I tell you, they are--they _are_!'
+
+In a second he is in the constable's strong grasp and being dragged,
+struggling violently, to the gate, when a soft voice, a woman's,
+intercedes for him.
+
+'What is the matter? Oh, don't--don't be so rough with him, poor
+creature!' it cries pitifully.
+
+'I'm only exercisin' my duty, mum,' says the officer; 'he wants to
+create a disturbance 'ere.'
+
+'No,' cries Wilfred, 'he lies! I only want to get into my own house, and
+no one seems to hear me. _You_ don't think anything is the matter, do
+you?'
+
+It is a lady who has been pleading for him; as he wrests himself from
+his captor and comes forward she sees his face, and her own grows white
+and startled.
+
+'Wilfred!' she exclaims.
+
+'Why, you know my name!' he says. 'Then you can tell him it's all
+right. Do I know you? You speak like--is it--_Ethel_?'
+
+'Yes,' she says, and her voice is low and trembling, 'I am Ethel.'
+
+He is silent for an instant; then he says slowly, 'You are not the
+same--nothing is the same: it is all changed--changed--and oh, my God,
+what am _I_?'
+
+Slowly the truth is borne in upon his brain, muddled and disordered by
+long excess, and the last shred of the illusion which had possessed him
+drifts away.
+
+He knows now that his boyhood, with such possibilities of happiness as
+it had ever held, has gone for ever. He has been knocking at a door
+which will open for him never again, and the mother by whose side his
+evening was to have been passed died long long years ago.
+
+The past, blotted out completely for an hour by some freak of the
+memory, comes back to him, and he sees his sullen, morbid boyhood
+changing into something worse still, until by slow degrees he became
+what he is now--dissipated, degraded, lost.
+
+At first the shock, the awful loneliness he awakes to, and the shame of
+being found thus by the woman for whom he had felt the only pure love he
+had known, overwhelm him utterly, and he leans his head upon his arms as
+he clutches the railings, and sobs with a grief that is terrible in its
+utter abandonment.
+
+The very policeman is silent and awed by what he feels to be a scene
+from the human tragedy, though he may not be able to describe it to
+himself by any more suitable phrase than 'a rum start.'
+
+'You can go now, policeman,' says the lady, putting money in his hand.
+'You see I know this--this gentleman. Leave him to me; he will give you
+no trouble now.'
+
+And the constable goes, taking care, however, to keep an eye
+occasionally on the corner where this has taken place. He has not gone
+long before Rolleston raises his head with a husky laugh: his manner has
+changed now; he is no longer the boy in thought and expression that he
+was a short time before, and speaks as might be expected from his
+appearance.
+
+'I remember it all now,' he says. 'You are Ethel Gordon, of course you
+are, and you wouldn't have anything to do with me--and quite right
+too--and then you married my brother Lionel. You see I'm as clear as a
+bell again now. So you came up and found me battering at the old door,
+eh? Do you know, I got the fancy I was a boy again and coming home
+to--bah, what does all that matter? Odd sort of fancy though, wasn't it?
+Drink is always playing me some cursed trick now. A pretty fool I must
+have made of myself!'
+
+She says nothing, and he thrusts his hands deep in his ragged pockets.
+'Hallo! what's this I've got?' he says, as he feels something at the
+bottom of one of them, and, bringing out the box of soldiers he had
+bought half an hour before, he holds it up with a harsh laugh which has
+the ring of despair in it.
+
+'Do you see this?' he says to her. 'You'll laugh when I tell you it's a
+toy I bought just now for--guess whom--for your dear husband! Must have
+been pretty bad, mustn't I? Shall I give it to you to take to him--no?
+Well, perhaps he has outgrown such things now, so here goes!' and he
+pitches the box over the railings, and it falls with a shiver of broken
+glass as the pieces of painted tin rattle out upon the flag-stones.
+
+'And now I'll wish you good evening,' he says, sweeping off his battered
+hat with mock courtesy.
+
+She tries to keep him back. 'No, Wilfred, no; you must not go like that.
+We live here still, Lionel and I, in the same old house,' and she
+indicates the house next door; 'he will be home very soon. Will you'
+(she cannot help a little shudder at the thought of such a guest)--'will
+you come in and wait for him?'
+
+'Throw myself into his arms, eh?' he says. 'How delighted he would be!
+I'm just the sort of brother to be a credit to a highly respectable
+young barrister like him. You really think he'd like it? No; it's all
+right, Ethel; don't be alarmed: I was only joking. I shall never come in
+your way, I promise you. I'm just going to take myself off.'
+
+'Don't say that,' she says (in spite of herself she feels relieved);
+'tell me--is there nothing we can do--no help we can give you?'
+
+'Nothing,' he answers fiercely; 'I don't want your pity. Do you think I
+can't see that you wouldn't touch me with the tongs if you could help
+it? It's too late to snivel over me now, and I'm well enough as I am.
+You leave me alone to go to the devil my own way; it's all I ask of you.
+Good-bye. It's Christmas, isn't it? I haven't dreamed _that_ at all
+events. Well, I wish you and Lionel as merry a Christmas as I mean to
+have. I can't say more than that in the way of enjoyment.'
+
+He turns on his heel at the last words and slouches off down the narrow
+lane by which he had come. Ethel Rolleston stands for a while, looking
+after his receding form till the fog closes round it and she can see it
+no more. She feels as if she had seen a ghost; and for her at least the
+enclosure before the deserted house next door will be haunted
+evermore--haunted by a forlorn and homeless figure sobbing there by the
+railings.
+
+As for the man, he goes on his way until he finds a door
+which--alas!--is not closed against him.
+
+
+
+
+_TOMMY'S HERO_
+
+A STORY FOR SMALL BOYS
+
+
+It was the night after Tommy had been taken to his first pantomime, and
+he had been lying asleep in his little bedroom (for now that he was nine
+he slept in the night nursery no longer); he had been asleep, when he
+was suddenly awakened by a brilliant red glare. At first he was afraid
+the house was on fire, but when the red turned to a dazzling green, he
+gave a great gasp of delight, for he thought the transformation scene
+was still going on. 'And there's all the best part still to come,' he
+said to himself.
+
+But as he became wider awake, he saw that it was out of the question to
+expect his bedroom to hold all those wonders, and he was almost
+surprised to see that there was even so much as a single fairy in it. A
+fairy there was, nevertheless; she stood there with a star in her hair,
+and her dress shimmering out all around her, just as he had seen her a
+few hours before, when she rose up, with little jerks, inside a great
+gilded shell, and spoke some poetry, which he didn't quite catch.
+
+She spoke audibly enough now, nor was her voice so squeaky as it had
+sounded before. 'Little boy,' she began, 'I am the ruling genius of
+Pantomime Fairyland. You entered my kingdom for the first time last
+night--how did you enjoy yourself?'
+
+'Oh,' said Tommy, '_so_ much; it was splendid, thank you!'
+
+She smiled and seemed well pleased. 'I always call to inquire on a new
+acquaintance,' she said. 'And so you liked our realms, as every sensible
+boy does? Well, Tommy, it is in my power to reward you; every night for
+a certain time you shall see again the things you liked best. What _did_
+you like best?'
+
+'The clown part,' said Tommy, promptly.
+
+For it ought to be said here that he was a boy who had always had a
+leaning to the kind of practical fun which he saw carried out by the
+clown to a pitch of perfection which at once enchanted and humbled him.
+Till that harlequinade, he had thought himself a funny boy in his way,
+and it had surprised him that his family had not found him more amusing
+than they did; but now he felt all at once that he was only a very
+humble beginner, and had never understood what real fun was.
+
+For he had not soared much above hiding behind doors, and popping out
+suddenly on a passing servant, causing her to 'jump' delightfully; once,
+indeed, he used to be able to 'sell' his family by pretending all
+manner of calamities, but they had grown so stupid lately that they
+never believed a single word he said.
+
+No, the clown would not own him as a follower: he would despise his
+little attempts at practical jokes. 'Still,' thought Tommy, 'I can try
+to be more like him; perhaps he will come to hear of me some day!'
+
+For he had never met anyone he admired half so much as that clown, who
+was always in a good temper (to be sure he had everything his own
+way--but then he deserved to), always quick and ready with his excuses;
+and if he did run away in times of danger, it was not because he was
+really afraid! Then how deliciously impudent he was to shopkeepers! Who
+but he would have dared to cheapen a large fish by making a door mat of
+it, or to ask the prices of cheeses on purpose to throw mud at them? Not
+that he couldn't be serious when he chose--for once he unfurled a Union
+Jack and said something quite noble, which made everybody clap their
+hands for two minutes; and he told people the best shops to go to for a
+quantity of things, and he could not have been joking _then_, for they
+were the same names that were to be seen on all the hoardings.
+
+This will explain how it was natural that Tommy, on being asked which
+part of the pantomime he preferred, should say, without the slightest
+hesitation, 'Oh, the _clown_ part!'
+
+The fairy seemed less pleased. 'The clown part!' she repeated. 'What,
+those shop scenes tacked on right at the end without rhyme or reason?'
+
+'Yes,' said Tommy, 'those ones!'
+
+'And the great wood with the shifting green and violet lights, and the
+white bands of fairies dancing in circles--didn't you like them?'
+
+'Oh yes,' said the candid Tommy; 'pretty well. I didn't care much for
+them.'
+
+'Well,' she said, 'but you liked the grand processions, with all their
+gorgeous dresses and monstrous figures, surely you liked _them_?'
+
+'There was such a lot of it,' said Tommy. 'The clown was the best.'
+
+'And if you could, you'd rather see those last scenes again than all the
+rest?' she said, frowning a little.
+
+'Oh, wouldn't I just!' said Tommy; 'but may I--really and truly?'
+
+'I see you are not one of _my_ boys,' said the Genius of Pantomime,
+rather sadly. 'It so happens that those closing scenes are the very ones
+I have least control over--they are a part of my kingdom which has
+fallen into sad decay and rebellion. But one thing, O Tommy, I _can_ do
+for you. I will give you the clown for a friend and companion--and much
+good may he do you!'
+
+'But would he _come_?' he asked, hardly daring to believe in such
+condescension.
+
+'He must, if _I_ bid him; it is for you to make him feel comfortable
+and at home with you;--the longer you can keep him the better I shall be
+pleased.'
+
+'Oh, _how_ kind of you!' he cried; 'he shall stay all the holidays. I'd
+rather have him than anybody else. What fun we shall have--what fun!'
+
+The green fire faded out and the fairy with it. He must have fallen
+asleep again, for, when he opened his eyes, there was the clown at the
+foot of his bed making a face.
+
+''Ullo!' said the clown; 'I say, are you the nice little boy I was told
+to come and stay with?'
+
+'Yes, yes,' said Tommy; 'I am so glad to see you. I'm just going to get
+up.'
+
+'I know you are,' said the clown, and upset him out of bed into the cold
+bath.
+
+This he could not help thinking a little bit unkind of the clown on such
+a cold morning, particularly as he followed it up by throwing a
+hair-brush, two pieces of soap, and a pair of shoes at him before he
+could get out again.
+
+But it woke him, at all events, and he ventured (with great respect) to
+throw one of the shoes back; it just grazed the clown's top-knot.
+
+To Tommy's alarm, the clown set up a hullaballoo as if he was mortally
+injured.
+
+'You cruel, unkind little boy,' he sobbed, 'to play so rough with a poor
+clown!'
+
+'But you threw them at me first,' pleaded Tommy, 'and much harder,
+too!'
+
+'I'm the oldest,' said the clown, 'and you've got to make me feel at
+home, or I shall go away again.'
+
+'I won't do it again, and I'm very sorry,' pleaded Tommy; but the clown
+wouldn't be friends with him for ever so long, and was only appeased at
+last by being allowed to put Tommy upside down in a tall wicker basket
+which stood in a corner.
+
+Then he helped Tommy to dress by buttoning all his clothes the wrong
+way, and hiding his stockings and necktie. While he was doing this,
+Sarah, the under-nurse, came in, and he strutted up to her and began to
+dance quietly. 'Go away, imperence,' said Sarah.
+
+'Beautiful gal,' said the clown (though Sarah was extremely plain), 'I
+love yer!' and he put out his tongue and wagged his head at her until
+she ran out of the room in terror.
+
+He looked so absurd that Tommy was delighted with him again, and yet,
+when the bell rang for breakfast, he felt obliged to give his new friend
+a hint.
+
+'I say,' he said, 'you don't mind my telling you--but mother's very
+particular about manners at table;' but the clown relieved him instantly
+by saying that so was he--_very_ particular; and he slid down the
+banisters and turned somersaults in the hall until Tommy joined him.
+
+'I do hope father and mother won't be unkind to him,' he thought, as he
+went in, 'because he does seem to feel things so.'
+
+But nothing could be more polite than the welcome Tommy's parents gave
+the stranger, as he came in, bowing very low, and making a queer little
+skipping step. Tommy's mother said she was always glad to see any friend
+of her boy's, while his father begged the clown to make himself quite at
+home. All _he_ said was, 'I'm disgusted to make your acquaintance;' but
+he certainly made himself at home--in fact, he was not quite so
+particular about his manners as he had led Tommy to expect.
+
+He volunteered to divide the sausages and bacon himself, and did so in
+such a way that everybody else got very little and he himself got a
+great deal. If it had been anybody else, Tommy would certainly have
+called this 'piggish'; as it was, he tried to think it was all fun, and
+that he himself had no particular appetite.
+
+His cousin Barbara, a little girl of about his own age, was staying with
+them just then, and came down presently to breakfast. 'Oh, my!' said the
+clown, laying a great red hand on his heart, 'what a nice little gal you
+are, ain't yer? Come and sit by me, my dear!'
+
+'No, thank you; I'm going to sit by Aunt Mary,' she replied, looking
+rather shy and surprised.
+
+'Allow me, missy,' he persisted, 'to pass you the strawberry-jam and
+the muffins!'
+
+'I'll have some jam, thank you,' she replied.
+
+He looked round and chuckled. 'Oh, I say; that little gal said "thank
+you" before she got it!' he exclaimed. 'There ain't no muffins, and I've
+eaten all the jam!' which made Tommy choke with laughter.
+
+Barbara flushed. 'That's a very stupid joke,' she pronounced severely,
+'and rude, too; it's a pity you weren't taught to behave better when you
+were young.'
+
+'So I was!' said the clown, with his mouth full.
+
+'Then you've forgotten it,' she said; 'you're nothing but a big baby,
+that you are!'
+
+'Yah!' retorted the clown; 'so are _you_ a big baby!' which, as even
+Tommy saw, was not a very brilliant reply. It was a singular fact about
+the clown that the slightest check seemed to take away all his
+brilliancy.
+
+'You know you're not telling the truth now,' said Barbara, so
+contemptuously, that the clown began to weep bitterly. 'She says I don't
+speak the truth!' he complained, 'and she _knows_ it will be my aunt's
+birthday last Toosday!'
+
+'You great silly thing, what has that to do with it?' cried Barbara,
+indignantly. 'What _is_ there to cry about?' which very nearly made
+Tommy quarrel with her, for why couldn't she be polite to _his_ friend?
+
+However, the clown soon dried his eyes on the tablecloth, and recovered
+his cheerfulness; and presently he noticed the _Times_ lying folded by
+Tommy's papa's plate.
+
+'Oh, I say, mister,' he said, 'shall I air the newspaper for yer?'
+
+'Thank you, if you will,' was the polite reply.
+
+He shook it all out in one great sheet and wrapped it round him, and
+waddled about in it until Tommy nearly rolled off his seat with delight.
+
+'When you've _quite_ done with it----' his father was saying mildly, as
+the clown made a great hole in the middle and thrust his head out of it
+with a bland smile.
+
+'I'm only just looking through it,' he explained; 'you can have it now,'
+and he rolled it up in a tight ball and threw it at his host's head.
+
+Breakfast was certainly not such a dull meal as usual that morning,
+Tommy thought; but he wished his people would show a little more
+appreciation, instead of sitting there all stiff and surprised; he was
+afraid the clown would feel discouraged.
+
+When his papa undid the ball, the paper was found to be torn into long
+strips, which delighted Tommy; but his father, on the other hand, seemed
+annoyed, possibly because it was not so easy to read in that form.
+Meanwhile, the clown busied himself in emptying the butter-dish into his
+pockets, and this did shock the boy a little, for he knew it was not
+polite to pocket things at meals, and wondered how he could be so nasty.
+
+Breakfast was over at last, and the clown took Tommy's arm and walked
+upstairs to the first floor with him.
+
+'Who's in there?' he asked, as they passed the spare bedroom.
+
+'Granny,' said the boy; 'she's staying with us; only she always has
+breakfast in her room, you know.'
+
+'Why, you don't mean to say you've got a granny!' cried the clown, with
+joy; 'you are a nice little boy; now we'll have some fun with her.'
+Tommy felt doubtful whether she could be induced to join them so early
+in the morning, and said so. 'You knock, and say you've got a present
+for her if she'll come out,' suggested the clown.
+
+'But I haven't,' objected Tommy; 'wouldn't that be a story?' He had
+unaccountably forgotten his old fondness for 'sells.'
+
+'Of course it would,' said the clown; 'I'm always a tellin' of 'em, I
+am.'
+
+Tommy was shocked once more, as he realised that his friend was not a
+_truthful_ clown. But he knocked at the door, nevertheless, and asked
+his grandmother to come out and see a friend of his.
+
+'Wait one minute, my boy,' she answered, 'and I'll come out.'
+
+Tommy was surprised to see his companion preparing to lie, face
+downwards, on the mat just outside the door.
+
+'Get up,' he said; 'you'll trip grandma up if you stay there.'
+
+'That's what I'm doing it for, stoopid,' said the clown.
+
+'But it will hurt her,' he cried.
+
+'Nothing hurts old women,' said the clown; 'I've tripped up 'undreds of
+'em, and I ought to know.'
+
+'Well, you shan't trip up my granny, anyhow,' said Tommy, stoutly; for
+he was not a bad-hearted boy, and his grandmother had given him a
+splendid box of soldiers on Christmas Day. 'Don't come out, granny; it's
+a mistake,' he shouted.
+
+The clown rose with a look of disgust.
+
+'Do you call this actin' like a friend to me?' he demanded.
+
+'Well,' said Tommy, apologetically, 'she's my granny, you see.'
+
+'She ain't _my_ granny, and, if she was, I'd let you trip her up, I
+would; _I_ ain't selfish. I shan't stop with you any longer.'
+
+'Oh, do,' said Tommy; 'we'll go and play somewhere else.'
+
+'Well,' said the clown, relenting, 'if you're a good boy you shall see
+me make a butter-slide in the hall.'
+
+Then Tommy saw how he had wronged him in thinking he had pocketed the
+butter out of mere greediness, and he felt ashamed and penitent; the
+clown made a beautiful slide, though Tommy wished he would not insist
+upon putting all the butter that was left down his back.
+
+'There's a ring at the bell,' said the clown; 'I'll open the door, and
+you hide and see the fun.'
+
+So Tommy hid himself round a corner as the door opened.
+
+'Walk in, sir,' said the clown, politely.
+
+'Master Tommy in?' said a jolly, hearty voice. It was dear old Uncle
+John, who had taken him to the pantomime the night before. 'I thought
+I'd look in and see if he would care to come with me to the
+Crystal----oh!' And there was a scuffling noise and a heavy bump.
+
+Tommy ran out, full of remorse. Uncle John was sitting on the tiles
+rubbing his head, and, oddly enough, did not look at all funny.
+
+'Oh, uncle,' cried the boy, 'you're not hurt? I didn't know it was you!'
+
+'I'm a bit shaken, my boy, that's all,' said his uncle; 'one doesn't
+come down like a feather at my age.' And he picked himself slowly up.
+'Well, I must get home again,' he said; 'no Crystal Palace to-day,
+Tommy, after this. Good-bye.'
+
+And he went slowly out, leaving Tommy with the feeling that he had had
+enough of slides. He even wiped the flooring clean again with a
+waterproof and the clothes-brush, though the clown (who had been hiding)
+tried to prevent him.
+
+'We ain't 'ad 'arf the fun out of it yet!' he complained (he always
+spoke in rather a common way, as Tommy began to notice with pain).
+
+'I've had enough,' said Tommy. 'It was my Uncle John who slipped down
+that time, and he's hurt, and he'd come to take me to the Crystal
+Palace!'
+
+'Well, he hadn't come to take _me_,' said the clown; 'you are stingy
+about your relations, you are; you ain't 'arf a boy for a bit o' fun.'
+
+Tommy felt this rebuke very much, he had hoped so to gain the clown's
+esteem; but he would not give in, he only suggested humbly that they
+should go up into the play-room.
+
+The play-room was at the top of the house, and Barbara and two little
+sisters of Tommy's were playing there when they came in, the clown
+turning in his toes and making awful faces.
+
+The two little girls ran into a corner, and seemed considerably
+frightened by the stranger's appearance, but Barbara reassured them.
+
+'Don't take any notice,' she said, 'it's only a horrid friend of
+Tommy's. He won't interfere with _us_.'
+
+'Oh, Barbara,' the boy protested, 'he's awfully nice if you only knew
+him. He can make you laugh. Do let us play with you. He wants to, and he
+won't be rough.'
+
+'Do,' pleaded the clown, 'I'll behave so pretty!'
+
+'Well,' said Barbara, 'mind you do, then, or you shan't stop.'
+
+And for a little while he did behave himself. Tommy showed him his new
+soldiers, and he seemed quite interested; and then he had a ride on the
+rocking horse, and was sorry when it broke down under him; and after
+that he came suddenly upon a beautiful doll which belonged to the
+youngest sister.
+
+'Do let me nurse it,' he said, and the little girl gave it up timidly.
+Of course he nursed it the wrong way up, and at last he forgot, and sat
+down on it, the head, which was wax, being crushed to pieces!
+
+Tommy was in fits of laughter at the droll face he made as he held out
+the crushed doll at arm's length, and looked at it with one eye shut,
+exclaiming, 'Poor thing! what a pity! I do 'ope I 'aven't made its 'ead
+ache!'
+
+But the two little girls were crying bitterly in one another's arms, and
+Barbara turned on the clown with tremendous indignation.
+
+'You did it on purpose, you know you did!' she said.
+
+'Go away, little girl; don't talk to me!' said the clown, putting Tommy
+in front of him.
+
+'Tommy,' she said, 'what did you bring your friend up here for? He only
+spoils everything he's allowed to touch. Take him away!'
+
+'Barbara,' pleaded Tommy, 'he's a _visitor_, you know!'
+
+'I don't care,' she replied. 'Mr. Clown, you shan't stay here; this is
+our room, and we don't want you. Go away!' She walked towards him
+looking so fierce that he backed hastily. 'Go downstairs,' she said,
+pointing to the door. 'You, too, Tommy, for you encouraged him!'
+
+'Nyah, nyah, nyah!' said the clown, a sound by which he intended to
+imitate her anger. 'Oh, please, I'm going; remember me to your mother.'
+And he left the room, followed rather sadly by Tommy, who felt that
+Barbara was angry with him. 'That's a very disagribble little girl,'
+remarked the clown, confidentially, when they were safe outside, and
+Tommy thought it wiser to agree.
+
+'What have you got in your pockets?' he asked, presently, seeing a hard
+bulge in his friend's white trunks.
+
+'Only some o' your nice soldiers,' said the clown, and walked into the
+schoolroom, where there was a fire burning. 'Are they brave?' he asked.
+
+'Very,' said Tommy, who had quite persuaded himself that this was so.
+'Look here, we'll have a battle.' He thought a battle would keep the
+clown quiet. 'Here's two cannon and peas, and you shall be the French
+and I'll be English.'
+
+'All right,' said the clown, and took his share of the soldiers and
+calmly put them all in the middle of the red-hot coals. 'I want to be
+quite sure they can stand fire first,' he explained; and then, as they
+melted, he said, 'There, you see, they're all running away. I never see
+such cowards.'
+
+Tommy was in a great rage, and could almost have cried, if it had not
+been babyish, for they were his best regiments which he could see
+dropping down in great glittering stars on the ashes below. 'That's a
+caddish thing to do,' he said, with difficulty; 'I didn't give them to
+you to put in the fire!'
+
+'Oh, I thought you did,' said the clown, 'I beg your pardon;' and he
+threw the rest after them as he spoke.
+
+'You're a beast!' cried Tommy, indignantly; 'I've done with you, after
+this.'
+
+'Oh, no, yer ain't,' he returned.
+
+'I have, though,' said Tommy; 'we're not friends any longer.'
+
+'All right,' said the clown; 'when I'm not friends with any one, I take
+and use the red-'ot poker to 'em,' and he put it in the fire to heat as
+he spoke.
+
+This terrified the boy. It was no use trying to argue with the clown,
+and he had seen how he used a red-hot poker. 'Well, I'll forgive you
+this time,' he said hastily; 'let's come away from here.'
+
+'I tell you what,' said the clown, 'you and me'll go down in the kitchen
+and make a pie.'
+
+Tommy forgot his injuries at this delightful idea; he knew what the
+clown's notion of pie-making would be. 'Yes,' he said eagerly, 'that
+will be jolly; only I don't know,' he added doubtfully, 'if cook will
+let us.'
+
+However, the clown soon managed to secure the kitchen to himself; he had
+merely to attempt to kiss the cook once or twice and throw the best
+dinner service at the other servants, and they were left quite alone to
+do as they pleased.
+
+What fun it was, to begin with! The clown brought out a large deep dish,
+and began by putting a whole turkey and an unskinned hare in it out of
+the larder; after that he put in sausages, jam, pickled walnuts, and
+lemons, and, in short, the first thing that came to hand.
+
+'It ain't 'arf full yet,' he said at last, as he looked gravely into the
+pie.
+
+'No,' said Tommy, sympathetically, 'can't we get anything else to put
+in?'
+
+'The very thing,' cried the clown, 'you're just about the right size to
+fill up--my! what a pie it's going to be, eh?' And he caught up his
+young friend, just as he was, rammed him into the pie, and poured sauce
+on him.
+
+But he kicked and howled until the clown grew seriously displeased. 'Why
+carn't you lay quiet,' he said angrily, 'like the turkey does? you don't
+deserve to be put into such a nice pie!'
+
+'If you make a pie of me,' said Tommy, artfully, 'there'll be nobody to
+look on and laugh at you, you know!'
+
+'No more there won't,' said the clown, and allowed him to crawl out,
+all over sauce. 'It was a pity,' he declared, 'because he fitted so
+nicely, and now they would have to look about for something else;' but
+he contrived to make a shift with the contents of the cook's
+work-basket, which he poured in--reels, pin-cushions, wax, and all. He
+had tried to put the kitchen cat in too, but she scratched his hands and
+could not be induced to form the finishing touch to the pie.
+
+How the clown got the paste and rolled it, and made Tommy in a mess with
+it, and how the pie was finished at last, would take too long to tell
+here; but somehow it was not quite such capital fun as he had
+expected--it seemed to want the pantomime music or something; and then
+Tommy was always dreading lest the clown should change his mind at the
+last minute, and put him in the pie after all.
+
+Even when it was safely in the oven he had another fear lest he should
+be made to stay and eat it, for it had such very peculiar things in it
+that it could not be at all nice. Fortunately, as soon as it was put
+away the clown seemed to weary of it himself.
+
+'Let me and you go and take a walk,' he suggested.
+
+Tommy caught at the proposal, for he was fast becoming afraid of the
+clown, and felt really glad to get him out of the house; so he got his
+cap, and the clown put on a brown overcoat and a tall hat, under which
+his white and red face looked stranger than ever, and they sallied forth
+together.
+
+Once Tommy would have thought it a high privilege to be allowed to go
+out shopping with a clown; but, if the plain truth must be told, he did
+not enjoy himself so very much after all. People seemed to stare at them
+so, for one thing, and he felt almost ashamed of his companion, whose
+behaviour was outrageously ridiculous. They went to all the family
+tradesmen, to whom Tommy was, of course, well known, and the clown
+_would_ order the most impossible things, and say they were for Tommy!
+Once he even pushed him into a large draper's shop, full of pretty and
+contemptuous young ladies, and basely left him to explain his presence
+as he could.
+
+But it was worse when they happened to meet an Italian boy with a tray
+of plaster images on his head.
+
+'Here's a lark!' said the clown, and elbowed Tommy against him in such a
+way that the tray slipped and all the images fell to the ground with a
+crash.
+
+It was certainly amusing to see all the pieces rolling about; but, while
+Tommy was still laughing, the boy began to howl and denounce him to the
+crowd which gathered round them. The crowd declared that it was a shame,
+and that Tommy ought to be made to pay for it; and no one said so more
+loudly and indignantly than the clown!
+
+Before he could escape he had to give his father's name and address, and
+promise that he would pay for the damage, after which he joined the
+clown (who had strolled on) with a heavy heart, for he knew that that
+business would stop all his pocket-money for years after he was grown
+up! He even ventured to reproach his friend: 'I shan't sneak of you, of
+course, he said, 'but you know _you_ did it!' The clown's only answer to
+this was a reproof for telling wicked stories.
+
+At last they passed a confectioner's, and the clown suddenly remembered
+that he was hungry, so they went in, and he borrowed sixpence from
+Tommy, which he spent in buns.
+
+He ate them all himself slowly, and was so very quiet and well-behaved
+all the time that Tommy hoped he was sobering down. They had gone a
+little way from the shop when he found that the clown was eating tarts.
+
+'You might give me one,' said Tommy; and the clown, after looking over
+his shoulder, actually gave him all he had left, filling his pocket with
+them, in fact.
+
+'I never saw you buy them,' he said wonderingly, which the clown said
+was very peculiar; and just then an attendant came up breathlessly.
+
+'You forgot to pay for those tarts,' she said.
+
+The clown replied that he never took pastry. She insisted that they
+were gone, and he must have taken them.
+
+'It wasn't me, please,' said the clown; 'it was this little boy done it.
+Why, he's got a jam tart in his pocket now. Where's a policeman?'
+
+Tommy was so thunderstruck by this treachery that he could say nothing.
+It was only what he might have expected, for had not the clown served
+the pantaloon exactly the same the night before? But that did not make
+the situation any the funnier now, particularly as the clown made such a
+noise that two real policemen came hurrying up.
+
+Tommy did not wait for them. No one held him, and he ran away at the top
+of his speed. What a nightmare sort of run it was!--the policemen
+chasing him, and the clown urging them on at the top of his voice.
+Everybody he passed turned round and ran after him too.
+
+Still he kept ahead. He was surprised to find how fast he could run, and
+all at once he remembered that he was running the opposite way from
+home. Quick as thought he turned up the first street he came to, hoping
+to throw them off the scent and get home by a back way.
+
+For the moment he thought he had got rid of them; but just as he stopped
+to take breath, they all came whooping and hallooing round the corner
+after him; and he had to scamper on, panting, and sobbing, and
+staggering, and almost out of his mind with fright. If he could only
+get home first, and tell his mother! But they were gaining on him, and
+the clown was leading and roaring with delight as he drew closer and
+closer. He came to a point where two roads met. It was round another
+corner, and they could not see him. He ran down one, and, to his immense
+relief, found they had taken the other. He was saved, for his house was
+quite near now.
+
+He tried to hasten, but the pavement was all slushy and slippery, and
+his boots felt heavier and heavier, and, to add to his misery, the
+pursuers had found out their mistake. As he looked back, he could see
+the clown galloping round the corner and hear his yell of discovery.
+
+'Oh, fairy, dear fairy,' he gasped, 'save me this time. I _do_ like your
+part best, now!'
+
+She must have heard him and taken pity, for in a second he had reached
+his door, and it flew open before him. He was not safe even yet, so he
+rushed upstairs to his bedroom, and bounced, just as he was, into his
+bed.
+
+'If they come up I'll pretend I'm ill,' he thought, as he covered his
+head with the bedclothes.
+
+They _were_ coming up, all of them. There was a great trampling on the
+stairs. He heard the clown officiously shouting: 'This way, Mr.
+Policeman, sir!' and then a tremendous battering at his door.
+
+He lay there shivering under the blankets.
+
+'Perhaps they'll think the door's locked, and go away,' he tried to
+hope, and the battering went on not quite so violently.
+
+'Master Tommy! Master Tommy!' It was Sarah's voice. They had got her to
+come up and tempt him out. Well, she _wouldn't_, then!
+
+And then--oh! horror!--the door was thrown open. He sprang out of bed in
+an agony.
+
+'Sarah! Sarah! keep them out,' he gasped. 'Don't let them take me away!'
+
+'Lor', Master Tommy! keep who out?' said Sarah, wonderingly.
+
+'The--the clown--and the policemen,' he said. 'I know they're behind the
+door.'
+
+'There, there!' said Sarah; 'why, you ain't done dreaming yet. That's
+what comes of going out to these late pantomimes. Rub your eyes; it's
+nearly eight o'clock.'
+
+Tommy could have hugged her. It was only a dream after all, then. As he
+stood there, shivering in his nightgown, the nightmare clown began to
+melt away, though even yet some of the adventures he had gone through
+seemed too vivid to be quite imaginary.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Singularly enough, his Uncle John actually did call that morning, and to
+take him to the Crystal Palace, too; and as there was no butter-slide
+for him to fall down on, they were able to go. On the way Tommy told him
+all about his unpleasant dream.
+
+'I shall always hate a clown after this, uncle,' he said, as he
+concluded.
+
+'My good Tommy,' said his uncle, 'when you are fortunate enough to dream
+a dream with a moral in it, don't go and apply it the wrong way up. The
+real clown, like a sensible man, keeps his fun for the place where it is
+harmless and appreciated, and away from the pantomime conducts himself
+like any other respectable person. Now, your _dream_ clown, Tommy----'
+
+'I know,' said Tommy, meekly. 'Should you think the pantomime was good
+here, Uncle John?'
+
+
+
+
+_A CANINE ISHMAEL_
+
+(FROM THE NOTES OF A DINER-OUT)
+
+
+'Tell me,' she said suddenly, with a pretty imperiousness that seemed to
+belong to her, 'are you fond of dogs?' How we arrived at the subject I
+forget now, but I know she had just been describing how a collie at a
+dog-show she had visited lately had suddenly thrown his forepaws round
+her neck in a burst of affection--a proceeding which, in my own mind
+(although I prudently kept this to myself), I considered less
+astonishing than she appeared to do.
+
+For I had had the privilege of taking her in to dinner, and the meal had
+not reached a very advanced stage before I had come to the conclusion
+that she was the most charming, if not the loveliest, person I had ever
+met.
+
+It was fortunate for me that I was honestly able to answer her question
+in a satisfactory manner, for, had it been otherwise, I doubt whether
+she would have deigned to bestow much more of her conversation upon me.
+
+'Then I wonder,' she said next, meditatively, 'if you would care to
+hear about a dog that belonged to--to someone I know very well? Or would
+it bore you?'
+
+I am very certain that if she had volunteered to relate the adventures
+of Telemachus, or the history of the Thirty Years' War, I should have
+accepted the proposal with a quite genuine gratitude. As it was, I made
+it sufficiently plain that I should care very much indeed to hear about
+that dog.
+
+She paused for a moment to reject an unfortunate _entree_ (which I
+confess to doing my best to console), and then she began her story. I
+shall try to set it down as nearly as possible in her own words,
+although I cannot hope to convey the peculiar charm and interest that
+she gave it for me. It was not, I need hardly say, told all at once, but
+was subject to the inevitable interruptions which render a dinner-table
+intimacy so piquantly precarious.
+
+'This dog,' she began quietly, without any air of beginning a story,
+'this dog was called Pepper. He was not much to look at--rather a rough,
+mongrelly kind of animal; and he and a young man had kept house together
+for a long time, for the young man was a bachelor and lived in chambers
+by himself. He always used to say that he didn't like to get engaged to
+anyone, because he was sure it would put Pepper out so fearfully.
+However, he met somebody at last who made him forget about Pepper, and
+he proposed and was accepted--and then, you know,' she added, as a
+little dimple came in her cheek, 'he had to go home and break the news
+to the dog.'
+
+She had just got to this point, when, taking advantage of a pause she
+made, the man on her other side (who was, I daresay, strictly within his
+rights, although I remember at the time considering him a pushing beast)
+struck in with some remark which she turned to answer, leaving me
+leisure to reflect.
+
+I was feeling vaguely uncomfortable about this story; something, it
+would be hard to say what, in her way of mentioning Pepper's owner made
+me suspect that he was more than a mere acquaintance of hers.
+
+Was it _she_, then, who was responsible for----? It was no business of
+mine, of course; I had never met her in my life till that evening--but I
+began to be impatient to hear the rest.
+
+And at last she turned to me again: 'I hope you haven't forgotten that I
+was in the middle of a story. You haven't? And you would really like me
+to go on? Well, then--oh yes, when Pepper was told, he was naturally a
+little annoyed at first. I daresay he considered he ought to have been
+consulted previously. But, as soon as he had seen the lady, he withdrew
+all opposition--which his master declared was a tremendous load off his
+mind, for Pepper was rather a difficult dog, and slow as a rule to take
+strangers into his affections, a little snappy and surly, and very
+easily hurt or offended. Don't you know dogs who are sensitive like
+that? _I_ do, and I'm always so sorry for them--they feel little things
+so much, and one never can find out what's the matter, and have it out
+with them! Sometimes it's shyness; once I had a dog who was quite
+painfully shy--self-consciousness it was really, I suppose, for he
+always fancied everybody was looking at him, and often when people were
+calling he would come and hide his face in the folds of my dress till
+they had gone--it was too ridiculous! But about Pepper. He was devoted
+to his new mistress from the very first. I am not sure that she was
+quite so struck with him, for he was not at all a lady's dog, and his
+manners had been very much neglected. Still, she came quite to like him
+in time; and when they were married, Pepper went with them for the
+honeymoon.'
+
+'_When they were married!_' I glanced at the card which lay half-hidden
+by her plate. Surely _Miss_ So-and-so was written on it?--yes, it was
+certainly 'Miss.' It was odd that such a circumstance should have
+increased my enjoyment of the story, perhaps--but it undoubtedly did.
+
+'After the honeymoon,' my neighbour continued, 'they came to live in the
+new house, which was quite a tiny one, and Pepper was a very important
+personage in it indeed. He had his mistress all to himself for the
+greater part of most days, as his master had to be away in town; so she
+used to talk to him intimately, and tell him more than she would have
+thought of confiding to most people. Sometimes, when she thought there
+was no fear of callers coming, she would make him play, and this was
+quite a new sensation for Pepper, who was a serious-minded animal, and
+took very solemn views of life. At first he hadn't the faintest idea
+what was expected of him; it must have been rather like trying to romp
+with a parish beadle, he was so intensely respectable! But as soon as he
+once grasped the notion and understood that no liberty was intended, he
+lent himself to it readily enough and learnt to gambol quite creditably.
+Then he was made much of in all sorts of ways; she washed him twice a
+week with her very own hands--which his master would never have dreamt
+of doing--and she was always trying new ribbons on his complexion. That
+rather bored him at first, but it ended by making him a little conceited
+about his appearance. Altogether he was dearly fond of her, and I don't
+believe he had ever been happier in all his life than he was in those
+days. Only, unfortunately, it was all too good to last.'
+
+Here I had to pass olives or something to somebody, and the other man,
+seeing his chance, and, to do him justice, with no idea that he was
+interrupting a story, struck in once more, so that the history of Pepper
+had to remain in abeyance for several minutes.
+
+My uneasiness returned. Could there be a mistake about that name-card
+after all? Cards _do_ get re-arranged sometimes, and she seemed to know
+that young couple so very intimately. I tried to remember whether I had
+been introduced to her as a Miss or Mrs. So-and-so, but without success.
+There is some fatality which generally distracts one's attention at the
+critical moment of introduction, and in this case it was perhaps easily
+accounted for. My turn came again, and she took up her tale once more.
+'I think when I left off I was saying that Pepper's happiness was too
+good to last. And so it was. For his mistress was ill, and, though he
+snuffed and scratched and whined at the door of her room for ever so
+long, they wouldn't let him in. But he managed to slip in one day
+somehow, and jumped up on her lap and licked her hands and face, and
+almost went out of his mind with joy at seeing her again. Only (I told
+you he was a sensitive dog) it gradually struck him that she was not
+_quite_ so pleased to see him as usual--and presently he found out the
+reason. There was another animal there, a new pet, which seemed to take
+up a good deal of her attention. Of course you guess what that was--but
+Pepper had never seen a baby before, and he took it as a personal slight
+and was dreadfully offended. He simply walked straight out of the room
+and downstairs to the kitchen, where he stayed for days.
+
+'I don't think he enjoyed his sulk much, poor doggie; perhaps he had an
+idea that when they saw how much he took it to heart they would send the
+baby away. But as time went on and this didn't seem to occur to them,
+he decided to come out of the sulks and look over the matter, and he
+came back quite prepared to resume the old footing. Only everything was
+different. No one seemed to notice that he was in the room now, and his
+mistress never invited him to have a game; she even forgot to have him
+washed--and one of his peculiarities was that he had no objection to
+soap and warm water. The worst of it was, too, that before very long the
+baby followed him into the sitting-room, and, do what he could, he
+couldn't make the stupid little thing understand that it had no business
+there. If you think of it, a baby must strike a dog as a very inferior
+little animal: it can't bark (well, yes, it _can_ howl), but it's no
+good whatever with rats, and yet everybody makes a tremendous fuss about
+it! The baby got all poor Pepper's bows now; and his mistress played
+games with it, though Pepper felt he could have done it ever so much
+better, but he was never allowed to join in. So he used to lie on a rug
+and pretend he didn't mind, though, really, I'm certain he felt it
+horribly. I always believe, you know, that people never give dogs half
+credit enough for feeling things, don't you?
+
+'Well, at last came the worst indignity of all: Pepper was driven from
+his rug--his own particular rug--to make room for the baby; and when he
+had got away into a corner to cry quietly, all by himself, that wretched
+baby came and crawled after him and pulled his tail!
+
+'He always _had_ been particular about his tail, and never allowed
+anybody to touch it but very intimate friends, and even then under
+protest, so you can imagine how insulted he felt.
+
+'It was too much for him, and he lost the last scrap of temper he had.
+They said he bit the baby, and I'm afraid he did--though not enough
+really to hurt it; still, it howled fearfully, of course, and from that
+moment it was all over with poor Pepper--he was a ruined dog!
+
+'When his master came home that evening he was told the whole story.
+Pepper's mistress said she would be ever so sorry to part with him, but,
+after his misbehaviour, she should never know a moment's peace until he
+was out of the house--it really wasn't safe for baby!
+
+'And his master was sorry, naturally; but I suppose he was beginning
+rather to like the baby himself, and so the end of it was that Pepper
+had to go. They did all they could for him; found him a comfortable
+home, with a friend who was looking out for a good house-dog, and wasn't
+particular about breed, and, after that, they heard nothing of him for a
+long while. And, when they did hear, it was rather a bad report: the
+friend could do nothing with Pepper at all; he had to tie him up in the
+stable, and then he snapped at everyone who came near, and howled all
+night--they were really almost afraid of him.
+
+'So when Pepper's mistress heard that, she felt more thankful than ever
+that the dog had been sent away, and tried to think no more about him.
+She had quite forgotten all about it, when, one day, a new nursemaid,
+who had taken the baby out for an airing, came back with a terrible
+account of a savage dog which had attacked them, and leaped up at the
+perambulator so persistently that it was as much as she could do to
+drive it away. And even then Pepper's mistress did not associate the dog
+with him; she thought he had been destroyed long ago.
+
+'But the next time the nurse went out with the baby she took a thick
+stick with her, in case the dog should come again. And no sooner had she
+lifted the perambulator over the step, than the dog _did_ come again,
+exactly as if he had been lying in wait for them ever since outside the
+gate.
+
+'The nurse was a strong country girl, with plenty of pluck, and as the
+dog came leaping and barking about in a very alarming way, she hit him
+as hard as she could on his head. The wonder is she did not kill him on
+the spot, and, as it was, the blow turned him perfectly giddy and silly
+for a time, and he ran round and round in a dazed sort of way--do you
+think you could lower that candle-shade just a little? Thanks!' she
+broke off suddenly, as I obeyed. 'Well, she was going to strike again,
+when her mistress rushed out, just in time to stop her. For, you see,
+she had been watching at the window, and although the poor beast was
+miserably thin, and rough, and neglected-looking, she knew at once that
+it must be Pepper, and that he was not in the least mad or dangerous,
+but only trying his best to make his peace with the baby. Very likely
+his dignity or his conscience or something wouldn't let him come back
+quite at once, you know; and perhaps he thought he had better get the
+baby on his side first. And then all at once, his mistress--I heard all
+this through her, of course--his mistress suddenly remembered how
+devoted Pepper had been to her, and how fond she had once been of him,
+and when she saw him standing, stupid and shivering, there, her heart
+softened to him, and she went to make it up with him, and tell him that
+he was forgiven and should come back and be her dog again, just as in
+the old days!----'
+
+Here she broke off for a moment. I did not venture to look at her, but I
+thought her voice trembled a little when she spoke again. 'I don't quite
+know _why_ I tell you all this. There was a time when I never could bear
+the end of it myself,' she said; 'but I have begun, and I will finish
+now. Well, Pepper's mistress went towards him, and called him;
+but--whether he was still too dizzy to quite understand who she was, or
+whether his pride came uppermost again, poor dear! I don't know--but he
+gave her just one look (she says she will never forget it--never; it
+went straight to her heart), and then he walked very slowly and
+deliberately away.
+
+'She couldn't bear it; she followed; she felt she simply _must_ make
+him understand how very, very sorry she was for him; but the moment he
+heard her he began to run faster and faster, until he was out of reach
+and out of sight, and she had to come back. I know she was crying
+bitterly by that time.'
+
+'And he never came back again?' I asked, after a silence.
+
+'Never again!' she said softly; 'that was the very last they ever saw or
+heard of him. And--and I've always loved every dog since for Pepper's
+sake!'
+
+'I'm almost glad he did decline to come back,' I declared; 'it served
+his mistress right--she didn't deserve anything else!'
+
+'Ah, I didn't want you to say that!' she protested; 'she never meant to
+be so unkind--it was all for the baby's sake!'
+
+I was distinctly astonished, for all her sympathy in telling the story
+had seemed to lie in the other direction.
+
+'You don't mean to say,' I cried involuntarily, 'that you can find any
+excuses for her? I did not expect _you_ would take the baby's part!'
+
+'But I did,' she confessed, with lowered eyes--'I _did_ take the baby's
+part--it was all my doing that Pepper was sent away--I have been sorry
+enough for it since!'
+
+It was her own story she had been telling at second-hand after all--and
+she was not Miss So-and-so! I had entirely forgotten the existence of
+any other members of the party but our two selves, but at the moment of
+this discovery--which was doubly painful--I was recalled by a general
+rustle to the fact that we were at a dinner-party, and that our hostess
+had just given the signal.
+
+As I rose and drew back my chair to allow my neighbour to pass, she
+raised her eyes for a moment and said almost meekly:
+
+'I _was_ the baby, you see!'
+
+
+
+
+_MARJORY_
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+I have thought myself justified in printing the following narrative,
+found among the papers of my dead friend, Douglas Cameron, who left me
+discretion to deal with them as I saw fit. It was written indeed, as its
+opening words imply, rather for his own solace and relief than with the
+expectation that it would be read by any other. But, painful and
+intimate as it is in parts, I cannot think that any harm will be done by
+printing it now, with some necessary alterations in the names of the
+characters chiefly concerned.
+
+Before, however, leaving the story to speak for itself, I should like to
+state, in justice to my friend, that during the whole of my acquaintance
+with him, which began in our college days, I never saw anything to
+indicate the morbid timidity and weakness of character that seem to have
+marked him as a boy. Reserved he undoubtedly was, with a taste for
+solitude that made him shrink from the society of all but a small
+circle, and with a sensitive and shy nature which prevented him from
+doing himself complete justice; but he was very capable of holding his
+own on occasion, and in his disposition, as I knew it, there was no want
+of moral courage, nor any trace of effeminacy.
+
+How far he may have unconsciously exaggerated such failings in the
+revelation of his earlier self, or what the influence of such an
+experience as he relates may have done to strengthen the moral fibre,
+are points on which I can express no opinion, any more than I can pledge
+myself to the credibility of the supernatural element of his story.
+
+It may be that only in the boy's overwrought imagination, the innocent
+Child-spirit came back to complete the work of love and pity she had
+begun in life; but I know that he himself believed otherwise, and,
+truly, if those who leave us are permitted to return at all, it must be
+on some such errand as Marjory's.
+
+Douglas Cameron's life was short, and in it, so far as I am aware, he
+met no one who at all replaced his lost ideal. Of this I cannot be
+absolutely certain, for he was a reticent man in such matters; but I
+think, had it been so, I should have known of it, for we were very close
+friends. One would hardly expect, perhaps, that an ordinary man would
+remain faithful all his days to the far-off memory of a child-love; but
+then Cameron was not quite as other men, nor were his days long in the
+land.
+
+And if this ideal of his was never dimmed for him by some grosser, and
+less spiritual, passion, who shall say that he may not have been a
+better and even a happier man in consequence.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+It is not without an effort that I have resolved to break, in the course
+of this narrative, the reserve maintained for nearly twenty years. But
+the chief reason for silence is removed now that all those are gone who
+might have been pained or harmed by what I have to tell, and, though I
+shrink still from reviving certain memories that are fraught with pain,
+there are others associated therewith which will surely bring
+consolation and relief.
+
+I must have been about eleven at the time I am speaking of, and the
+change which--for good or ill--comes over most boys' lives had not yet
+threatened mine. I had not left home for school, nor did it seem at all
+probable then that I should ever do so.
+
+When I read (I was a great reader) of Dotheboys Hall and Salem House--a
+combination of which establishments formed my notion of school-life--it
+was with no more personal interest than a cripple might feel in perusing
+the notice of an impending conscription; for from the battles of
+school-life I was fortunately exempted.
+
+I was the only son of a widow, and we led a secluded life in a London
+suburb. My mother took charge of my education herself, and, as far as
+mere acquirements went, I was certainly not behind other boys of my
+age. I owe too much to that loving and careful training, Heaven knows,
+to think of casting any reflection upon it here, but my surroundings
+were such as almost necessarily to exclude all bracing and hardening
+influences.
+
+My mother had few friends; we were content with our own companionship,
+and of boys I knew and cared to know nothing; in fact, I regarded a
+strange boy with much the same unreasoning aversion as many excellent
+women feel for the most ordinary cow.
+
+I was happy to think that I should never be called upon to associate
+with them; by-and-by, when I outgrew my mother's teaching, I was to have
+a tutor, perhaps even go to college in time, and when I became a man I
+was to be a curate and live with my mother in a clematis-covered cottage
+in some pleasant village.
+
+She would often dwell on this future with a tender prospective pride;
+she spoke of it on the very day that saw it shattered for ever.
+
+For there came a morning when, on going to her with my lessons for the
+day, I was gladdened with an unexpected holiday. I little knew
+then--though I was to learn it soon enough--that my lessons had been all
+holidays, or that on that day they were to end for ever.
+
+My mother had had one or two previous attacks of an illness which seemed
+to prostrate her for a short period, and as she soon regained her
+ordinary health, I did not think they could be of a serious nature.
+
+So I devoted my holiday cheerfully enough to the illumination of a
+text, on the gaudy colouring of which I found myself gazing two days
+later with a dull wonder, as at the work of a strange hand in a long
+dead past, for the boy who had painted that was a happy boy who had a
+mother, and for two endless days I had been alone.
+
+Those days, and many that followed, come back to me now but vaguely. I
+passed them mostly in a state of blank bewilderment caused by the double
+sense of sameness and strangeness in everything around me; then there
+were times when this gave way to a passionate anguish which refused all
+attempts at comfort, and times even--but very, very seldom--when I
+almost forgot what had happened to me.
+
+Our one servant remained in the house with me, and a friend and
+neighbour of my mother's was constant in her endeavours to relieve my
+loneliness; but I was impatient of them, I fear, and chiefly anxious to
+be left alone to indulge my melancholy unchecked.
+
+I remember how, as autumn began, and leaf after leaf fluttered down from
+the trees in our little garden, I watched them fall with a heavier
+heart, for they had known my mother, and now they, too, were deserting
+me.
+
+This morbid state of mind had lasted quite long enough when my uncle,
+who was my guardian, saw fit to put a summary end to it by sending me
+to school forthwith; he would have softened the change for me by taking
+me to his own home first, but there was illness of some sort there, and
+this was out of the question.
+
+I was neither sorry nor glad when I heard of it, for all places were the
+same to me just then; only, as the time drew near, I began to regard the
+future with a growing dread.
+
+The school was at some distance from London, and my uncle took me down
+by rail; but the only fact I remember connected with the journey is that
+there was a boy in the carriage with us who cracked walnuts all the way,
+and I wondered if he was going to school too, and concluded that he was
+not, or he would hardly eat quite so many walnuts.
+
+Later we were passing through some wrought-iron gates, and down an
+avenue of young chestnuts, which made a gorgeous autumn canopy of
+scarlet, amber, and orange, up to a fine old red-brick house, with a
+high-pitched roof, and a cupola in which a big bell hung, tinted a warm
+gold by the afternoon sun.
+
+This was my school, and it did not look so very-terrible after all.
+There was a big bow-window by the pillared portico, and, looking timidly
+in, I saw a girl of about my own age sitting there, absorbed in the book
+she was reading, her long brown hair drooping over her cheek and the
+hand on which it rested.
+
+She glanced up at the sound of the door-bell, and I felt her eyes
+examining me seriously and critically, and then I forgot everything but
+the fact that I was about to be introduced to my future schoolmaster,
+the Rev. Basil Dering.
+
+This was less of an ordeal than I had expected; he had a strong,
+massively-cut, leonine face, free and abundant white hair, streaked with
+dark grey, but there was a kind light in his eyes as I looked up at
+them, and the firm mouth could smile, I found, pleasantly enough.
+
+Mrs. Dering seemed younger, and was handsome, with a certain stateliness
+and decision of manner which put me less at my ease, and I was relieved
+to be told I might say good-bye to my uncle, and wander about the
+grounds as I liked.
+
+I was not surprised to pass through an empty schoolroom, and to descend
+by some steep stairs to a deserted playground, for we had been already
+told that the Michaelmas holidays were not over, and that the boys would
+not return for some days to come.
+
+It gave me a kind of satisfaction to think of my resemblance, just then,
+to my favourite David Copperfield, but I was to have a far pleasanter
+companion than poor lugubrious, flute-tootling Mr. Mell, for as I paced
+the damp paths paved with a mosaic of russet and yellow leaves, I heard
+light footsteps behind me, and turned to find myself face to face with
+the girl I had seen at the window.
+
+She stood there breathless for an instant, for she had hurried to
+overtake me, and against a background of crimson creepers I saw the
+brilliant face, with its soft but fearless brown eyes, small straight
+nose, spirited mouth, and crisp wavy golden-brown hair, which I see now
+almost as distinctly as I write.
+
+'You're the new boy,' she said at length. 'I've come out to make you
+feel more at home. I suppose you don't feel _quite_ at home just yet?'
+
+'Not quite, thank you,' I said, lifting my cap with ceremony, for I had
+been taught to be particular about my manners; 'I have never been to
+school before, you see, Miss Dering.'
+
+I think she was a little puzzled by so much politeness. 'I know,' she
+said softly; 'mother told me about it, and I'm very sorry. And I'm
+called Marjory, generally. Shall you like school, do you think?'
+
+'I might,' said I, 'if--if it wasn't for the boys!'
+
+'Boys aren't bad,' she said; 'ours are rather nice, I think. But perhaps
+you don't know many?'
+
+'I know one,' I replied.
+
+'How old is _he_?' she wished to know.
+
+'Not very old--about three, I think,' I said. I had never wished till
+then that my only male acquaintance had been of less tender years, but I
+felt now that he was rather small, and saw that Marjory was of the same
+opinion.
+
+'Why, he's only a baby!' she said; 'I thought you meant a _real_ boy.
+And is that all the boys you know? Are you fond of games?'
+
+'Some games--very,' said I.
+
+'What's your favourite game?' she demanded.
+
+'Bezique,' I answered, 'or draughts.'
+
+'I meant _out_door games; draughts are indoor games--_is_ indoor games,
+I mean--no, _are_ an indoor game--and _that_ doesn't sound grammar! But
+haven't you ever played cricket? Not ever, really? I like it dreadfully
+myself, only I'm not allowed to play with the boys, and I'm sure I can
+bat well enough for the second eleven--Cartwright said I could last
+term--and I can bowl round-hand, and it's all no use, just because I was
+born a girl! Wouldn't you like a game at something? They haven't taken
+in the croquet hoops yet; shall we play at that?'
+
+But again I had to confess my ignorance of what was then the popular
+garden game.
+
+'What do you generally do to amuse yourself, then?' she inquired.
+
+'I read, generally, or paint texts or outlines. Sometimes'--(I thought
+this accomplishment would surely appeal to her)--'sometimes I do
+woolwork!'
+
+'I don't think I would tell the boys that,' she advised rather gravely;
+she evidently considered me a very desperate case. 'It's such a pity,
+your not knowing any games. Suppose I taught you croquet, now? It would
+be something to go on with, and you'll soon learn if you pay attention
+and do exactly what I tell you.'
+
+I submitted myself meekly to her direction, and Marjory enjoyed her
+office of instructress for a time, until my extreme slowness wore out
+her patience, and she began to make little murmurs of disgust, for which
+she invariably apologised. 'That's enough for to-day!' she said at last,
+'I'll take you again to-morrow. But you really must try and pick up
+games, Cameron, or you'll never be liked. Let me see, I wonder if
+there's time to teach you a little football. I think I could do that.'
+
+Before she could make any further arrangements the tea-bell rang, but
+when I lay down that night in my strange cold bed, hemmed round by other
+beds, which were only less formidable than if they had been occupied, I
+did not feel so friendless as I might have done, and dreamed all night
+that Marjory was teaching me something I understood to be cricket,
+which, however, was more like a bloated kind of backgammon.
+
+The next day Marjory was allowed to go out walking with me, and I came
+home feeling that I had known her for quite a long time, while her
+manner to me had acquired a tone even more protecting than before, and
+she began to betray an anxiety as to my school prospects which filled me
+with uneasiness.
+
+'I am so afraid the boys won't like the way you talk,' she said on one
+occasion.
+
+'I used to be told I spoke very correctly,' I said, verdantly enough.
+
+'But not like boys talk. You see, Cameron, I ought to know, with such a
+lot of them about. I tell you what I could do, though--I could teach you
+most of their words--only I must run and ask mother first if I may.
+Teaching slang isn't the same as using it on my own account, is it?'
+
+Marjory darted off impulsively to ask leave, to return presently with a
+slow step and downcast face. 'I mayn't,' she announced. 'Mother says
+"Certainly not," so there's an end of that! Still, I think myself it's a
+decided pity.'
+
+And more than once that day she would observe, as if to herself, 'I do
+wish they had let him come to school in different collars!'
+
+I knew that these remarks, and others of a similar tendency, were
+prompted by her interest in my welfare, and I admired her too heartily
+already to be offended by them: still, I cannot say they added to my
+peace of mind.
+
+And on the last evening of the holidays she said 'Good-night' to me with
+some solemnity. 'Everything will be different after this,' she said; 'I
+shan't be able to see nearly so much of you, because I'm not allowed to
+be much with the boys. But I shall be looking after you all the time,
+Cameron, and seeing how you get on. And oh! I do hope you will try to be
+a popular kind of boy!'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+I'm afraid I must own that this desire of Marjory's was not realised. I
+do not know that I tried to be--and I certainly was not--a popular boy.
+
+The other boys, I now know, were by no means bad specimens of the
+English schoolboy, as will be evident when I state that, for a time, my
+deep mourning was held by them to give me a claim to their forbearance.
+
+But I had an unfortunate tendency to sudden floods of tears (apparently
+for no cause whatever, really from some secret spring of association,
+such as I remember was touched when I first found myself learning Latin
+from the same primer over which my mother and I had puzzled together),
+and these outbursts at first aroused my companions' contempt, and
+finally their open ridicule.
+
+I could not conceal my shrinking dislike to their society, which was not
+calculated to make them more favourably disposed towards me; while my
+tastes, my expressions, my ways of looking at things, were all at total
+variance with their own standards.
+
+The general disapproval might well have shown itself in a harsher manner
+than that of merely ignoring my existence--and it says much for the tone
+of the school that it did not; unfortunately, I felt their indifference
+almost as keenly as I had dreaded their notice.
+
+From my masters I met with more favour, for I had been thoroughly well
+grounded, and found, besides, a temporary distraction in my school-work;
+but this was hardly likely to render me more beloved by my fellows, and
+so it came to pass that every day saw my isolation more complete.
+
+Something, however, made me anxious to hide this from Marjory's eyes,
+and whenever she happened to be looking on at us in the school grounds
+or the playing fields, I made dismal attempts to appear on terms of
+equality with the rest, and would hang about a group with as much
+pretence of belonging to it as I thought at all prudent.
+
+If she had had more opportunities of questioning me, she would have
+found me out long before; as it was, the only occasion on which we were
+near one another was at the weekly drawing lesson, when, although she
+drew less and talked more than the Professor quite approved of, she was
+obliged to restrict herself to a conversation which did not admit of
+confidences.
+
+But this negative neutral-tinted misery was not to last; I was harmless
+enough, but then to some natures nothing is so offensive as
+inoffensiveness. My isolation was certain to raise me up an enemy in
+time, and he came in the person of one Clarence Ormsby.
+
+He was a sturdy, good-looking fellow, about two years older than myself,
+good at games, and, though not brilliant in other respects, rather idle
+than dull. He was popular in the school, and I believe his general
+disposition was by no means bad; but there must have been some hidden
+flaw in his nature which might never have disclosed itself for any other
+but me.
+
+For me he had displayed, almost from the first, one of those special
+antipathies that want but little excuse to ripen into hatred. My
+personal appearance--I had the misfortune to be a decidedly plain
+boy--happened to be particularly displeasing to him, and, as he had an
+unsparing tongue, he used it to cover me with ridicule, until gradually,
+finding that I did not retaliate, he indulged in acts of petty
+oppression which, though not strictly bullying, were even more harassing
+and humiliating.
+
+I suspect now that if I had made ever so slight a stand at the outset, I
+should have escaped further molestation, but I was not pugnacious by
+nature, and never made the experiment; partly, probably, from a theory
+on which I had been reared, that all violence was vulgar, but chiefly
+from a tendency, unnatural in one of my age and sex, to find a
+sentimental satisfaction in a certain degree of unhappiness.
+
+So that I can neither pity myself nor expect pity from others for woes
+which were so essentially my own creation, though they resulted, alas!
+in misery that was real enough.
+
+It was inevitable that quick-sighted Marjory should discover the
+subjection into which I had fallen, and her final enlightenment was
+brought about in this manner. Ormsby and I were together alone, shortly
+before morning school, and he came towards me with an exercise of mine
+from which he had just been copying his own, for we were in the same
+classes, despite the difference in our ages, and he was in the habit of
+profiting thus by my industry.
+
+'Thanks, Cameron,' he said, with a sweetness which I distrusted, for he
+was not as a rule so lavish in his gratitude. 'I've copied out that
+exercise of yours, but it's written so beastly badly that you'd better
+do it over again.'
+
+With which he deliberately tore the page he had been copying from to
+scraps, which he threw in my face, and strolled out down to the
+playground.
+
+I was preparing submissively to do the exercise over again as well as I
+could in the short time that was left, when I was startled by a low cry
+of indignation, and, looking round, saw Marjory standing in the doorway,
+and knew by her face that she had seen all.
+
+'Has Ormsby done that to you before?' she inquired.
+
+'Once or twice he has,' said I.
+
+'And you let him!' she cried. 'Oh, Cameron!'
+
+'What can I do?' I said.
+
+'I know what _I_ would do,' she replied. 'I would slap his face, or
+pinch him. I wouldn't put up with it!'
+
+'Boys don't slap one another, or pinch,' I said, not displeased to find
+a weak place in her knowledge of us.
+
+'Well, they do _something_!' she said; 'a real boy would. But I don't
+think you are a real boy, Cameron. _I'll_ show you what to do. Where's
+the exercise that--that _pig_ copied? Ah! I see it. And now--look!'
+(Here she tore his page as he had torn mine.)
+
+'Now for an envelope!' and from the Doctor's own desk she took an
+envelope, in which she placed the fragments, and wrote on the outside in
+her round, childish hand: 'With Marjory's compliments, for being a
+bully.'
+
+'He won't do that again,' she said gleefully.
+
+'He'll do worse,' I said in dismay; 'I shall have to pay for it.
+Marjory, why didn't you leave things alone? I didn't complain--you know
+I didn't.'
+
+She turned upon me, as well she might, in supreme disdain. 'Oh! what a
+coward you are! I wouldn't believe all Cartwright told me about you when
+I asked--but I see it's all true. Why don't you stick up for yourself?'
+
+I muttered something or other.
+
+'But you _ought_ to. You'll never get on unless,' said Marjory, very
+decidedly. 'Now, promise me you will, next time.'
+
+I sat there silent. I was disgusted with myself, and meanly angry with
+her for having rendered me so.
+
+'Then, listen,' she said impressively. 'I promised I would look after
+you, and I did mean to, but it's no use if you won't help yourself. So,
+unless you say you won't go on being a coward any more, I shall have to
+leave you to your own way, and not take the least interest in you ever
+again.'
+
+'Then, you may,' I said stolidly; 'I don't care.' I wondered, even while
+I spoke the words, what could be impelling me to treat spirited,
+warm-hearted Marjory like that, and I hate myself still at the
+recollection.
+
+'Good-bye, then,' she said very quietly; 'I'm sorry, Cameron.' And she
+went out without another word.
+
+When Ormsby came in, I watched him apprehensively as he read the
+envelope upon his desk and saw its contents. He said nothing, however,
+though he shot a malignant glance in my direction; but the lesson was
+not lost upon him, for from that time he avoided all open ill-treatment
+of me, and even went so far as to assume a friendliness which might have
+reassured me had I not instinctively felt that it merely masked the old
+dislike.
+
+I was constantly the victim of mishaps, in the shape of missing and
+defaced books, ink mysteriously spilt or strangely adulterated, and,
+though I could never trace them to any definite hand, they seemed too
+systematic to be quite accidental; still I made no sign, and hoped thus
+to disarm my persecutor--if persecutor there were.
+
+As for my companions, I knew that in no case would they take the trouble
+to interfere in my behalf; they had held aloof from the first, the
+general opinion (which I now perceive was not unjust) being that 'I
+deserved all I got.'
+
+And my estrangement from Marjory grew wider and wider; she never spoke
+to me now when we sat near one another at the drawing-class; if she
+looked at me it was by stealth, and with a glance that I thought
+sometimes was contemptuously pitiful, and sometimes half fancied
+betrayed a willingness to return to the old comradeship.
+
+But I nursed my stupid, sullen pride, though my heart ached with it at
+times. For I had now come to love Marjory devotedly, with a love that,
+though I was a boy and she was a child, was as genuine as any I am ever
+likely to feel again.
+
+The chance of seeing her now and then, of hearing her speak--though it
+was not to me--gave me the one interest in my life, which, but for her,
+I could hardly have borne. But this love of mine was a very far-off and
+disinterested worship after all. I could not imagine myself ever
+speaking of it to her, or picture her as accepting it. Marjory was too
+thorough a child to be vulgarised in that way, even in thought.
+
+The others were healthy, matter-of-fact youths, to whom Marjory was an
+ordinary girl, and who certainly did not indulge in any strained
+sentiment respecting her; it was left for me to idealise her; but of
+that, at least, I cannot feel ashamed, or believe that it did me
+anything but good.
+
+And the days went on, until it wanted but a fortnight to Christmas, and
+most of us were thinking of the coming holidays, and preparing with a
+not unpleasant excitement for the examinations, which were all that
+barred the way to them now. I was to spend my Christmas with my uncle
+and cousins, who would by that time be able to receive me; but I felt no
+very pleasurable anticipations, for my cousins were all boys, and from
+boys I thought I knew what to expect.
+
+One afternoon Ormsby came to me with the request that I would execute a
+trifling commission for him in the adjoining village; he himself, he
+said, was confined to bounds, but he had a shilling he wanted to lay out
+at a small fancy-shop we were allowed to patronise, and he considered me
+the best person to be entrusted with that coin. I was simply to spend
+the money on anything I thought best, for he had entire confidence, he
+gave me to understand, in my taste and judgment. I think I suspected a
+design of some sort, but I did not dare to refuse, and then his manner
+to some extent disarmed me.
+
+I took the shilling, therefore, with which I bought some article--I
+forget what--and got back to the school at dusk. The boys had all gone
+down to tea except Ormsby, who was waiting for me up in the empty
+schoolroom.
+
+'Well?' he said, and I displayed my purchase, only to find that I had
+fallen into a trap.
+
+When I think how easily I was the dupe of that not too subtle artifice,
+which was only half malicious, I could smile, if I did not know how it
+ended.
+
+'How much was that?' he asked contemptuously, 'twopence-halfpenny? Well,
+if you choose to give a shilling for it, I'm not going to pay, that's
+all. So just give me back my shilling!'
+
+Now, as my weekly allowance consisted of threepence, which was
+confiscated for some time in advance (as I think he knew), to provide
+fines for my mysteriously-stained dictionaries, this was out of the
+question, as I represented.
+
+'Then go back to the shop and change it,' said he; 'I won't have that
+thing!'
+
+'Tell me what you would like instead, and I will,' I stipulated, not
+unreasonably.
+
+He laughed; his little scheme was working so admirably. 'That's not the
+bargain,' he said; 'you're bound to get me something I like. I'm not
+obliged to tell you what it is.'
+
+But even I was driven to protest against such flagrant unfairness. 'I
+didn't know you meant that,' I said, 'or I'm sure I shouldn't have gone.
+I went to oblige _you_, Ormsby.'
+
+'No, you didn't,' he said, 'you went because I told you. And you'll go
+again.'
+
+'Not unless you tell me what I'm to get,' I said.
+
+'I tell you what I believe,' he said; 'you never spent the whole
+shilling at all on that; you bought something for yourself with the
+rest, you young swindler! No wonder you won't go back to the shop.'
+
+This was, of course, a mere taunt flung out by his inventive fancy; but
+as he persisted in it, and threatened exposure and a variety of
+consequences, I became alarmed, for I had little doubt that, innocent as
+I was, I could be made very uncomfortable by accusations which would
+find willing hearers.
+
+He stood there enjoying my perplexity and idly twisting a piece of
+string round and round his fingers. At length he said, 'Well, I don't
+want to be hard on you. You may go and change this for me even now, if
+you like. I'll give you three minutes to think it over, and you can come
+down into the playground when I sing out, and tell me what you mean to
+do. And you had better be sharp in coming, too, or it will be the worse
+for you.'
+
+He took his cap, and presently I heard him going down the steps to the
+playground. I would have given worlds to go and join the rest at tea,
+but I did not dare, and remained in the schoolroom, which was dim just
+then, for the gas was lowered; and while I stood there by the fireplace,
+trembling in the cold air which stole in through the door Ormsby had
+left open, Marjory came in by the other one, and was going straight to
+her father's desk, when she saw me.
+
+Her first impulse seemed to be to take no notice, but something in my
+face or attitude made her alter her mind and come straight to me,
+holding out her hand.
+
+'Cameron,' she said, 'shall we be friends again?'
+
+'Yes, Marjory,' I said; I could not have said any more just then.
+
+'You look so miserable, I couldn't bear it any longer,' she said, 'so I
+_had_ to make it up. You know, I was only pretending crossness, Cameron,
+all the time, because I really thought it was best. But it doesn't seem
+to have done you much good, and I did promise to take care of you. What
+is it? Ormsby again?'
+
+'Yes,' I said, and told her the story of the commission.
+
+'Oh, you stupid boy!' she cried, 'couldn't you see he only wanted to
+pick a quarrel? And if you change it now, he'll make you change it
+again, and the next time, and the next after that--I know he will!'
+
+Here Ormsby's voice shouted from below, 'Now then, you, Cameron, time's
+up!'
+
+'What is he doing down there?' asked Marjory, and her indignation rose
+higher when she heard.
+
+'Now, Cameron, be brave; go down and tell him once for all he may just
+keep what he has, and be thankful. Whatever it is, it's good enough for
+_him_, I'm sure!'
+
+But I still hung back. 'It's no use, Marjory, he'll tell everyone I
+cheated him--he says he will!'
+
+'That he shall not!' she cried; 'I won't have it, I'll go myself, and
+tell him what I think of him, and make him stop treating you like this.'
+
+Some faint glimmer of manliness made me ashamed to allow her thus to
+fight my battles. 'No, Marjory, not you!' I said; 'I will go: I'll say
+what you want me to say!'
+
+But it was too late. I saw her for just a second at the door, my
+impetuous, generous little Marjory, as she flung back her pretty hair in
+a certain spirited way she had, and nodded to me encouragingly.
+
+And then--I can hardly think of it calmly even now--there came a sharp
+scream, and the sound of a fall, and, after that, silence.
+
+Sick with fear, I rushed to the head of the steps, and looked down into
+the brown gloom.
+
+'Keep where you are for a minute!' I heard Ormsby cry out. 'It's all
+right--she's not hurt; now you can come down.'
+
+I was down in another instant, at the foot of the stairs, where, in a
+patch of faint light that fell from the door above, lay Marjory, with
+Ormsby bending over her insensible form.
+
+'She's dead!' I cried in my terror, as I saw her white face.
+
+'I tell you she's all right,' said he, impatiently; 'there's nothing to
+make a fuss about. She slipped coming down and cut her forehead--that's
+all.'
+
+'Marjory, speak to me--don't look like that; tell me you're not much
+hurt!' I implored her; but she only moaned a little, and her eyes
+remained fast shut.
+
+'It's no use worrying her now, you know,' said Ormsby, more gently.
+'Just help me to get her round to the kitchen door, and tell somebody.'
+
+We carried her there between us, and, amidst a scene of terrible
+confusion and distress, Marjory, still insensible, was carried into the
+library, and a man sent off in hot haste for the surgeon.
+
+A little later Ormsby and I were sent for to the study, where Dr.
+Dering, whose face was white and drawn as I had never seen it before,
+questioned us closely as to our knowledge of the accident.
+
+Ormsby could only say that he was out in the playground, when he saw
+somebody descending the steps, and heard a fall, after which he ran up
+and found Marjory.
+
+'I sent her into the schoolroom to bring my paper-knife,' said the
+Doctor; 'if I had but gone myself--! But why should she have gone
+outside on a frosty night like this?'
+
+'Oh, Dr. Dering!' I broke out, 'I'm afraid--I'm afraid she went for me!'
+
+I saw Ormsby's face as I spoke, and there was a look upon it which made
+me pity him.
+
+'And you sent my poor child out on your errand, Cameron! Could you not
+have done it yourself?'
+
+'I wish I had!' I exclaimed; 'oh, I wish I had! I tried to stop her,
+and then--and then it was too late. Please tell me, sir, is she badly
+hurt?'
+
+'How can I tell?' he said harshly; 'there, I can't speak of this just
+yet: go, both of you.'
+
+There was little work done at evening preparation that night; the whole
+school was buzzing with curiosity and speculation, as we heard doors
+opening and shutting around, and the wheels of the doctor's gig as it
+rolled up the chestnut avenue.
+
+I sat with my hands shielding my eyes and ears, engaged to all
+appearance with the books before me, while my restless thoughts were
+employed in making earnest resolutions for the future.
+
+At last I saw my cowardice in its true light, and felt impatient to tell
+Marjory that I did so, to prove to her that I had really reformed; but
+when would an opportunity come? I might not see her again for days,
+perhaps not at all till after the holidays; but I would not let myself
+dwell upon such a contingency as that, and, to banish it, tried to
+picture what Marjory would say, and how she would look, when I was
+allowed to see her again.
+
+After evening prayers, read by one of the assistant-masters, for the
+Doctor did not appear again, we were enjoined to go up to our bedrooms
+with as little noise as possible, and we had been in bed some time
+before Sutcliffe, the old butler, came up as usual to put out the
+lights.
+
+On this occasion he was assailed by a fire of eager whispers from every
+door: 'Sutcliffe, hi! old Sutty, how is she?' but he did not seem to
+hear, until a cry louder than the rest brought him to our room.
+
+'For God's sake, gentlemen, don't!' he said, in a hoarse whisper, as he
+turned out the light; 'they'll hear you downstairs.'
+
+'But how is she? do you know--better?'
+
+'Ay,' he said, 'she's better. She'll be over her trouble soon, will Miss
+Marjory!'
+
+A low murmur of delight ran round the room, which the butler tried to
+check in vain.
+
+'Don't!' he said again, 'wait--wait till morning.... Go to sleep quiet
+now, and I'll come up first thing and tell you.'
+
+He had no sooner turned his back than the general relief broke out
+irrepressibly; Ormsby being especially demonstrative. 'Didn't I tell you
+fellows so?' he said triumphantly; 'as if it was likely a plucky girl
+like Marjory would mind a little cut like that. She'll be all right in
+the morning, you see!'
+
+But this confidence jarred upon me, who could not pretend to share it,
+until I was unable to restrain the torturing anxiety I felt.
+
+'You're wrong--all of you!' I cried, 'I'm sure she's not better. Didn't
+you hear how Sutcliffe said it? She's _worse_--she may even be dying!'
+
+I met with the usual treatment of a prophet of evil. 'You young muff,' I
+was told on all sides, 'who asked your opinion? Who are you, to know
+better than anyone else?'
+
+Ormsby attacked me hotly for trying to excite a groundless alarm, and I
+was recommended to hold my tongue and go to sleep.
+
+I said no more, but I could not sleep; the others dropped off one by
+one, Ormsby being the last; but I lay awake listening and thinking,
+until the dread and suspense grew past bearing. I _must_ know the truth.
+I would go down and find the Doctor, and beg him to tell me; he might be
+angry and punish me--but that would be nothing in comparison with the
+relief of knowing my fear was unfounded.
+
+Stealthily I slipped out of bed, stole through the dim room to the door,
+and down the old staircase, which creaked under my bare feet. The dog in
+the yard howled as I passed the big window, through which the stars were
+sparkling frostily in the keen blue sky. Outside the room in which
+Marjory lay, I listened, but could hear nothing. At least she was
+sleeping, then, and, relieved already, I went on down to the hall.
+
+The big clock on a table there was ticking solemnly, like a slow
+footfall; the lamp was alight, so the Doctor must be still up. With a
+heart that beat loudly I went to his study door and lifted my hand to
+knock, when from within rose a sound at which the current of my blood
+stopped and ran backwards--the terrible, heartbroken grief of a grown
+man.
+
+Boy as I was, I felt that an agony like that was sacred; besides, I
+knew the worst then.
+
+I dragged myself upstairs again, cold to the bones, with a brain that
+was frozen too. My one desire was to reach my bed, cover my face, and
+let the tears flow; though, when I did regain it, no tears and no
+thoughts came. I lay there and shivered for some time, with a stony,
+stunned sensation, and then I slept--as if Marjory were well.
+
+The next morning the bell under the cupola did not clang, and Sutcliffe
+came up with the direction that we were to go down very quietly, and not
+to draw up the window-blinds; and then we all knew what had happened
+during the night.
+
+There was a very genuine grief, though none knew Marjory as I had known
+her; the more emotional wept, the older ones indulged in little
+semi-pious conventional comments, oddly foreign to their usual tone;
+all--even the most thoughtless--felt the same hush and awe overtake
+them.
+
+I could not cry; I felt nothing, except a dull rage at my own
+insensibility. Marjory was dead--and I had no tears.
+
+Morning school was a mere pretence that day; we dreaded, for almost the
+first time, to see the Doctor's face, but he did not show himself, and
+the arrangements necessary for the breaking-up of the school were made
+by the matron.
+
+Some, including Ormsby and myself, could not be taken in for some days,
+during which we had to remain at the school: days of shadow and
+monotony, with occasional ghastly outbreaks of the high spirits which
+nothing could repress, even in that house of mourning.
+
+But the time passed at last, until it was the evening of the day on
+which Marjory had been left to her last sleep.
+
+The poor father and mother had been unable to stay in the house now that
+it no longer covered even what had been their child; and the only two,
+besides the matron and a couple of servants who still remained there,
+were Ormsby and I, who were both to leave on the following morning.
+
+I would rather have been alone just then with anyone but Ormsby, though
+he had never since that fatal night taken the slightest notice of me; he
+looked worn and haggard to a degree that made me sure he must have cared
+more for Marjory than I could have imagined, and yet he would break at
+times into a feverish gaiety which surprised and repelled me.
+
+He was in one of these latter moods that evening, as we sat, as far
+apart as possible, in the empty, firelit schoolroom.
+
+'Now, Cameron,' he said, as he came up to me and struck me boisterously
+on the shoulder, 'wake up, man! I've been in the blues long enough. We
+can't go on moping always, on the night before the holidays, too! Do
+something to make yourself sociable--talk, can't you?'
+
+'No, I can't,' I said; and, breaking from him, went to one of the
+windows and looked vacantly out into blackness, which reflected the long
+room, with its dingy greenish maps, and the desks and forms glistening
+in the fire-beams.
+
+The ice-bound state in which I had been so long was slowly passing away,
+now that the scene by the little grave that raw, cheerless morning had
+brought home remorselessly the truth that Marjory was indeed gone--lost
+to me for ever.
+
+I could see now what she had been to me; how she had made my great
+loneliness endurable; how, with her innocent, fearless nature, she had
+tried to rouse me from spiritless and unmanly dejection. And I could
+never hope to please her now by proving that I had learnt the lesson;
+she had gone from me to some world infinitely removed, in which I was
+forgotten, and my pitiful trials and struggles could be nothing to her
+any more!
+
+I was once more alone, and this second bereavement revived in all its
+crushing desolation the first bitter loss which it so closely followed.
+
+So, as I stood there at the window, my unnatural calm could hold out no
+longer; the long-frozen tears thawed, and I could weep for the first
+time since Marjory died.
+
+But I was not allowed to sorrow undisturbed; I felt a rough grasp on my
+arm, as Ormsby asked me angrily, 'What's the matter now?'
+
+'Oh, Marjory, come to me!' I could only cry; 'I can't bear it! I can't!
+I can't!'
+
+'Stop that, do you hear?' he said savagely, 'I won't have it! Who are
+you to cry about her, when--but for _you_----'
+
+He got no farther; the bitter truth in such a taunt, coming from him,
+stung me to ungovernable rage. I turned and struck him full in the
+mouth, which I cut open with my clenched hand.
+
+His eyes became all pupil. 'You shall pay me for that!' he said through
+his teeth; and, forcing me against a desk, he caught up a large T-square
+which lay near; he was far the stronger, and I felt myself powerless in
+his grasp. Passion and pain had made him beside himself for the moment,
+and he did not know how formidable a weapon the heavily-weighted
+instrument might become in his hand.
+
+I shut my eyes: I think I rather hoped he would kill me, and then
+perhaps I might go where Marjory was. I did not cry for help, and it
+would have been useless if I had done so, for the schoolroom was a long
+way from the kitchen and offices of that rambling old house.
+
+But before the expected blow was dealt I felt his grasp relax, and heard
+the instrument fall with a sudden clatter on the floor. 'Look,' he
+whispered, in a voice I did not recognise, '_look there_!'
+
+And when I opened my eyes, I saw Marjory standing between us!
+
+She looked just as I had always seen her: I suppose that even the
+after-life could not make Marjory look purer, or more lovely than she
+was on earth. My first feeling was a wild conviction that it had all
+been some strange mistake--that Marjory was not dead.
+
+'Marjory, Marjory!' I cried in my joy, 'is it really you? You have come
+back, after all, and it is not true!'
+
+She looked at us both without speaking for a moment; her dear brown eyes
+had lost their old childish sparkle, and were calm and serious as if
+with a deeper knowledge.
+
+Ormsby had cowered back to the opposite wall, covering his face. 'Go
+away!' he gasped. 'Cameron--_you_ ask her to go. She--she liked you....
+I never meant it. Tell her I never meant to do it!'
+
+I could not understand such terror at the sight of Marjory, even if she
+had been what he thought her; but there was a reason in his case.
+
+'You were going to hurt Cameron,' said Marjory, at length, and her voice
+sounded sad and grave and far-away.
+
+'I don't care, Marjory,' I cried, 'not now you are here!'
+
+She motioned me back: 'You must not come nearer,' she said. 'I cannot
+stay long, and I must speak to Ormsby. Ormsby, have you told anyone?'
+
+'No,' he said, shaking all over, 'it could do no good.... I thought I
+needn't.'
+
+'Tell _him_,' said Marjory.
+
+'Must I? Oh, no, no!' he groaned, 'don't make me do that!'
+
+'You must,' she answered, and he turned to me with a sullen fear.
+
+'It was like this,' he began; 'that night, when I was waiting for you
+down there--I had some string, and it struck me, all in a moment, that
+it would be fun to trip you up. I didn't mean to hurt you--only frighten
+you. I fastened the string across a little way from the bottom. And
+then'--he had to moisten his lips before he could go on--'then _she_
+came down, and I tried to catch her--and couldn't--no, I couldn't!'
+
+'Is that all?' asked Marjory, as he stopped short.
+
+'I cut the string and hid it before you came. Now you know, and you may
+tell if you like!'
+
+'Cameron, you will never tell, will you--as long as he lives?' said
+Marjory. 'You must promise.'
+
+I was horrified by what I had heard; but her eyes were upon me, and I
+promised.
+
+'And you, Ormsby, promise me to be kinder to him after this.'
+
+He could not speak; but he made a sign of assent.
+
+'And now,' said Marjory, 'shake hands with him and forgive him.'
+
+But I revolted: 'No, Marjory, I can't; not now--when I know this!'
+
+'Cameron, dear,' she said, 'you won't let me go away sorry, will you?
+and I must go so soon. For my sake, when I wish it so!'
+
+I went to Ormsby, and took his cold, passive hand. 'I do forgive him,
+Marjory,' I said.
+
+She smiled brightly at us both. 'And you won't forget, either of you?'
+she said. 'And, Douglas, you will be brave, and take your own part now.
+Good-bye, good-bye.'
+
+I tried to reach her. 'Don't leave me; take me with you, Marjory--dear,
+dear Marjory, don't go!' But there was only firelit space where she had
+stood, though the sound of her pleading, pathetic voice was still in the
+air.
+
+Ormsby remained for a few minutes leaning against a desk, with his face
+buried in his arms, and I heard him struggling with his sobs. At last he
+rose, and left the room without a word.
+
+But I stayed there where I had last seen Marjory, till the fire died
+down, and the hour was late, for I was glad to be alone with the new and
+solemn joy that had come to me. For she had not forgotten me where she
+was; I had been allowed to see her once more, and it might even be that
+I should see her again. And I resolved then that when she came she
+should find me more worthy of her.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+From that night my character seemed to enter upon a new phase, and when
+I returned to school it was to begin my second term under better
+auspices.
+
+My cousins had welcomed me cordially among them, and as I mastered the
+lesson of give and take, of respecting one's self in respecting others,
+which I needed to learn, my early difficulties vanished with the
+weakness that had produced them.
+
+By Ormsby I was never again molested; in word and deed, he was true to
+the promise exacted from him during that last strange scene. At first,
+he avoided me as being too painfully connected with the past; but by
+degrees, as he recognised that his secret was safe in my keeping, we
+grew to understand one another better, although it would be too much to
+say that we ever became intimate.
+
+After he went to Sandhurst I lost sight of him, and only a few months
+since the news of his death in the Soudan, where he fell gallantly, made
+me sorrowfully aware that we should never meet again.
+
+I had a lingering fancy that Marjory might appear to me once more, but I
+have long since given up all hope of that in this life, and for what may
+come after I am content to wait.
+
+But the charge my child-friend had undertaken was completed on the night
+she was allowed to return to earth and determine the crisis of two
+lives; there is nothing now to call the bright and gracious little
+spirit back, for her influence will remain always.
+
+
+     _Spottiswoode & Co. Printers, New-street Square, London_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+WORKS BY F. ANSTEY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+SECOND EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6_s._
+
+THE TALKING HORSE;
+
+AND OTHER TALES.
+
++From THE DAILY CHRONICLE.+--'Full of quaintnesses, fun about dogs and
+boys, and with now and then a graver touch.... Stories which no one but
+the author of "Vice Versa" could have produced.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+FOURTH EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6_s._
+
+THE GIANT'S ROBE.
+
++From THE PALL MALL GAZETTE.+--'The main interest of the book, which is
+very strong indeed, begins when Vincent returns, when Harold Caffyn
+discovers the secret, when every page threatens to bring down doom on
+the head of the miserable Mark. Will he confess? Will he drown himself?
+Will Vincent denounce him? Will Caffyn inform on him? Will his wife
+abandon him?--we ask eagerly as we read, and cannot cease reading till
+the puzzle is solved in a series of exciting situations.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+POPULAR EDITION. Crown 8vo. 6_s._
+
+CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2_s._ 6_d._
+
+THE PARIAH.
+
++From THE SATURDAY REVIEW.+--'In "The Pariah" we are more than ever
+struck by the sharp intuitive perception and the satirical balancing of
+judgment which makes the author's writings such extremely entertaining
+reading. There is not a dull page--we might say, not a dull sentence--in
+it.... The girls are delightfully drawn, especially the bewitching
+Margot and the childish Lettice. Nothing that polish and finish,
+cleverness, humour, wit, and sarcasm can give is left out.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2_s._ 6_d._
+
+VICE VERSA;
+
+OR, A LESSON TO FATHERS.
+
++From THE SATURDAY REVIEW.+--'If ever there was a book made up from
+beginning to end of laughter, and yet not a comic book, or a "merry"
+book, or a book of jokes, or a book of pictures, or a jest book, or a
+tomfool book, but a perfectly sober and serious book, in the reading of
+which a sober man may laugh without shame from beginning to end, it is
+the new book called "Vice Versa; or, a Lesson to Fathers."... We close
+the book, recommending it very earnestly to all fathers in the first
+instance, and their sons, nephews, uncles, and male cousins next.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+CHEAP EDITION. Crown 8vo. limp red cloth, 2_s._ 6_d._
+
+A FALLEN IDOL.
+
++From THE TIMES.+--'Mr. Anstey's new story will delight the
+multitudinous public that laughed over "Vice Versa."... The boy who
+brings the accursed image to Champion's house, Mr. Bales, the artist's
+factotum, and above all Mr. Yarker, the ex-butler who has turned
+policeman, are figures whom it is as pleasant to meet as it is
+impossible to forget.'
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+NOVELS BY THE AUTHOR OF 'MEHALAH.'
+
+_Fcp. 8vo. Pictorial boards, 2s. each; or limp red cloth, 2s. 6d. each._
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+MEHALAH:
+
+A STORY OF THE SALT MARSHES.
+
+'The book is one of the most powerful that has, so far as we know,
+appeared for many years. It will remind many readers of Emily Bronte's
+wonderful story, "Wuthering Heights," and indeed in some respects it is
+even more powerful.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+'"Mehalah" is far above the ordinary level of novels. The writer
+possesses strength, and strength is one of the rarest qualities in
+modern fiction.'--DAILY NEWS.
+
+'A bit of real romance: original, violent, powerful, novel both in place
+and circumstance, and peculiarly impressive.'--TRUTH.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+JOHN HERRING:
+
+A WEST OF ENGLAND ROMANCE.
+
+'Among most novels of the day "John Herring" is a very considerable work
+indeed, and both deserves and will receive proportionate
+attention.'--PALL MALL GAZETTE.
+
+'Far, very far, above the level of ordinary novels.'--ACADEMY.
+
+'A powerful and interesting novel. The English is admirable; there is
+great freshness and vigour in the descriptions of scenery and character,
+and in the narrative there is abundance of invention, and many of the
+situations are extremely dramatic.... A book of unusual originality and
+power.'--TIMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+COURT ROYAL.
+
+'"Court Royal" is among the few novels of our time that deserve, and
+will probably obtain, life beyond its day. Intellect, knowledge, fancy,
+and humour have gone to its making, and thought besides.'--GRAPHIC.
+
+'The story holds the reader under a spell which is unbroken from first
+to last.'--MORNING POST.
+
+'It is difficult to say which is the most striking feature of this
+remarkable and welcome novel--the quaint humour, the consummate power,
+or the freshness.'--VANITY FAIR.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+THE GAVEROCKS.
+
+'Marked by the vigour of style the freshness of invention, and the
+dramatic power which have gained this talented writer his
+reputation.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+'A tale of vivid and well-sustained interest.'--GUARDIAN.
+
+'The story is one of deep human interest, while the intensity of its
+local colouring enhances its intrinsic merit.'--MORNING POST.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+RICHARD CABLE,
+
+THE LIGHTSHIPMAN.
+
+'A novel essentially readable, and full of life and colour.'--DAILY
+TELEGRAPH.
+
+'The story has a strong interest, which is likely to prove enduring. It
+is as good as anything this powerful writer has produced.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The 'MOLLY BAWN' SERIES of POPULAR NOVELS
+
+Works by the Author of 'MOLLY BAWN,' 'GREEN PLEASURE AND GREY GRIEF,'
+&c. &c.
+
+_In Pictorial Covers, fcp. 8vo. 2s.; or, in limp red cloth, fcp. 8vo.
+2s. 6d. each._
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+PHYLLIS: A NOVEL.
+
+'A clever and interesting novel.'--SPECTATOR. 'Very pleasant
+writing.'--QUEEN.
+
+
+MOLLY BAWN.
+
+'Really an attractive novel, idealising human life without departing
+from the truth, and depicting the love of a tender, feminine, yet
+high-spirited girl in a most touching manner. Full of wit, spirit, and
+gaiety. All women will envy and all men will fall in love with her.
+Higher praise we surely cannot give.'--ATHENAEUM.
+
+
+'AIRY FAIRY LILIAN.'
+
+'A delightful story, cast in the same mould as its predecessors. The
+characters are cleverly drawn, the dialogue is terse and
+pointed.'--COURT JOURNAL.
+
+
+MRS. GEOFFREY.
+
+'A prettier or more readable story than "Mrs. Geoffrey" nobody need wish
+to meet with.'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+
+ROSSMOYNE.
+
+'Monica Beresford is a very pretty example of Irish _naivete_
+dissociated from shilleaghs; and there is true humour in the conception
+of Kit, her sister.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+DORIS.
+
+'"Doris" is a clever story of a marriage of convenience.... The dialogue
+is good: that of "Dicky Browne," a kind of licensed jester, being really
+bright and lively. The heroine is well drawn, and so is a terrible aunt
+of hers, whose encounters with the Marquis (himself a clever portrait)
+are diverting.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+GREEN PLEASURE AND GREY GRIEF.
+
+'"Green Pleasure and Grey Grief" is what many of its readers will be
+inclined to call a sweetly pretty story.'--ATHENAEUM.
+
+
+PORTIA.
+
+'"Portia, or by Passions Rocked," is of the category of novels to which
+may fairly be applied the epithet of "charming."'--MORNING POST.
+
+
+BEAUTY'S DAUGHTERS.
+
+'Another triumph.... Of the success of the story there can hardly be any
+doubt.' COURT JOURNAL.
+
+
+FAITH AND UNFAITH.
+
+'A singularly bright, vivacious, readable story.'--ILLUSTRATED LONDON
+NEWS.
+
+'Distinctly superior to three-fourths of the fiction
+published.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+LADY BRANKSMERE.
+
+'.... Sufficiently sensational to suit the most ardent admirers of
+fiction, and yet contains much that is worthy of admiration.'--COURT
+JOURNAL.
+
+
+LOYS, LORD BERRESFORD, and other Tales.
+
+'A collection of stories which cannot fail to be popular. There is
+something good in all of them, and one or two are especially racy and
+piquant.'--ACADEMY.
+
+
+UNDER-CURRENTS.
+
+'Altogether as enjoyable as one is accustomed to expect from the clever
+author of "Molly Bawn."'--SCOTSMAN.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+NOVELS BY GEORGE GISSING.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Fcp. 8vo. Pictorial boards, 2s. each; or limp red cloth, 2s. 6d. each._
+
+
+DEMOS:
+
+A STORY OF SOCIALIST LIFE IN ENGLAND.
+
+'If a tale of Socialism does not find abundance of readers, it is not
+because the times are not ripe for it. This remarkable novel presents
+the great social problem in a striking garb.... "Demos" does not aspire
+to vie with "Alton Locke," but it tells a story more practical, and of
+more brightness and variety.'--TIMES.
+
+'A really able and vigorous romance.'--ATHENAEUM.
+
+'This is a novel of very considerable ability.... It is evidently
+written by a man who has a very intimate knowledge of the working
+classes, and not a little sympathy with them.... Nothing can be more
+skilful than the sketch of the artisan family round whose fortunes the
+story of the book revolves. The chief character is very powerfully
+drawn.... His mother too, with her narrow, complaining, and almost dumb
+integrity, ... the weak, pretty daughter, and the worthless, blackguard
+son, are hardly less truthful studies.... The sketch of the one or two
+Socialist meetings which the author has occasion to describe, of the
+style of Socialist literature, and the conversation of Socialist
+agitators, shows an intimate knowledge of that field of
+action.'--SPECTATOR.
+
+
+A LIFE'S MORNING.
+
+'Powerful and unique, as all Mr. Gissing's former writings are. "A
+Life's Morning" is his _chef-d'oeuvre_.... The story is most
+fascinating and most natural.' WHITEHALL REVIEW.
+
+'As a study of feminine nature, "A Life's Morning" is, perhaps, the most
+successful of all Mr. Gissing's works, and deserves to be fully as
+popular as its predecessors.' PALL MALL GAZETTE.
+
+'A story which is marked by imaginative insight, subtle delineation of
+character, epigrammatic force of style, and gleams of genuine
+humour.'--STANDARD.
+
+
+THE NETHER WORLD.
+
+'Terrible in its earnestness, in its "untouched" photography of the
+desperate struggles and bitter misery of the London poor; never was
+word-painting more thoroughly and obviously true.'--WORLD.
+
+'Mr. Gissing is one of the few persons who can handle pitch without
+being defiled by it. While he runs Zola close as a realist, his thoughts
+and language are as pure as those of Miss Yonge herself.'--STANDARD.
+
+'A powerful and most interesting novel.'--MANCHESTER GUARDIAN.
+
+
+_Crown 8vo. 6s._
+
+THYRZA.
+
+'A very good story indeed.... In power and pathetic treatment the novel
+is above the average.'--ATHENAEUM.
+
+'Thyrza is a really exquisite figure; as pathetic a creation as can well
+be imagined.... In short, "Thyrza" is a book of unusual literary
+merit.'--MORNING POST.
+
+
+_Crown 8vo. 6s._
+
+NEW GRUB STREET.
+
+'Mr. Gissing's writing is bright and strong, his humour is delightful,
+and his satire is easy and yet restrained.'--SPEAKER.
+
+'Mr. Gissing has produced a very powerful book.... Full of clever
+touches on literary and social matters.'--SATURDAY REVIEW.
+
+'The book is decidedly forcible, and, to a great extent, the result of
+experience.' ATHENAEUM.
+
+'Mr. Gissing's new book is the best bit of work he has done since
+"Thyrza." In none of his recent novels has there been such reality of
+feeling, such pathos, such careful yet broad analysis of character. Mr.
+Gissing's characters are real living men and women; they are drawn with
+great skill, sympathy, and truth.'--GUARDIAN.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+ILLUSTRATED EDITIONS
+
+OF
+
+POPULAR WORKS.
+
+Handsomely bound in cloth gilt, each volume containing
+
+Four Illustrations. Crown 8vo. 3s. 6d. each.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
++THE SMALL HOUSE AT ALLINGTON.+ By ANTHONY TROLLOPE
+
++FRAMLEY PARSONAGE.+ By ANTHONY TROLLOPE
+
++THE CLAVERINGS.+ By ANTHONY TROLLOPE
+
++TRANSFORMATION:+ a Romance. By NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE.
+
++DOMESTIC STORIES.+ By the Author of 'John Halifax, Gentleman.'
+
++THE MOORS AND THE FENS.+ By Mrs. J. H. RIDDELL.
+
++WITHIN THE PRECINCTS.+ By Mrs. OLIPHANT.
+
++CARITA.+ By Mrs. OLIPHANT.
+
++FOR PERCIVAL.+ By MARGARET VELEY.
+
++NO NEW THING.+ By W. E. NORRIS.
+
++LOVE THE DEBT.+ By RICHARD ASHE KING ('Basil').
+
++WIVES AND DAUGHTERS.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++NORTH AND SOUTH.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++SYLVIA'S LOVERS.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++CRANFORD, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++MARY BARTON, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++RUTH; THE GREY WOMAN, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
++LIZZIE LEIGH; A DARK NIGHT'S WORK, and other Stories.+ By Mrs. GASKELL.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+ILLUSTRATED EDITION
+
+OF THE
+
+LIFE AND WORKS
+
+OF
+
+CHARLOTTE BRONTE
+
+(CURRER BELL),
+
+AND HER SISTERS
+
+EMILY AND ANNE BRONTE
+
+(ELLIS AND ACTON BELL).
+
+In Seven Volumes, Large Crown 8vo. handsomely bound in cloth.
+
+_Price 5s. per Volume._
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The descriptions in 'Jane Eyre' and the other Fictions by Charlotte
+Bronte and her Sisters being mostly of actual places, the Publishers
+considered that Views were the most suitable Illustrations for the
+Novels. They were indebted for a clue to the real names of the most
+interesting scenes to a friend of the Bronte family, who enabled the
+artist, Mr. G. M. Wimperis, to identify the places described. He made
+faithful sketches of them on the spot, and drew them on wood.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+1.--+JANE EYRE.+ By Charlotte Bronte. With Five Illustrations.
+LOWOOD.
+GATESHEAD HALL.
+THORNFIELD HALL.
+MOOR HOUSE.
+FERNDEAN MANOR.
+
+2.--+SHIRLEY.+ By Charlotte Bronte. With Five Illustrations.
+YORKE'S HOUSE.
+NUNNELY COMMON AND WOOD.
+FIELDHEAD HALL.
+HOLLOW'S MILL.
+BRIARFIELD CHURCH.
+
+3.--+VILLETTE.+ By Charlotte Bronte. With Five Illustrations.
+THE PARK, BRUSSELS.
+DOME OF ST. PAUL'S.
+PENSIONNAT DES DEMOISELLES, BRUSSELS.
+GARDEN IN THE RUE FOSSETTE.
+GRANDE PLACE, BRUSSELS.
+
+4.--+THE PROFESSOR, and POEMS.+ By Charlotte Bronte. With Poems by
+her Sisters and Father. With Five Illustrations.
+VIEW FROM CRIMSWORTH HALL.
+HOUSE IN DAISY LANE.
+RUE ROYALE, BRUSSELS.
+PROTESTANT CEMETERY.
+VIEW OF THE MOORS.
+
+5.--+WUTHERING HEIGHTS.+ By Emily Bronte. +AGNES GREY.+ By Anne
+Bronte. With a Preface and Biographical Notice of both Authors, by
+Charlotte Bronte. With Five Illustrations.
+HAWORTH CHURCH AND PARSONAGE.
+VALLEY OF GIMMERTON.
+WUTHERING HEIGHTS.
+THE MOORS.
+HORTON LODGE.
+
+6.--+THE TENANT OF WILDFELL HALL.+ By Anne Bronte. With Five
+Illustrations.
+WILDFELL HALL.
+GRASSDALE MANOR.
+HARRINGBY HALL.
+ON THE MOORS.
+WILDFELL HALL (_second view_).
+
+7.--+LIFE OF CHARLOTTE BRONTE.+ By Mrs. Gaskell. With Seven
+Illustrations.
+PORTRAIT OF CHARLOTTE BRONTE.
+PORTRAIT OF THE REV. PATRICK BRONTE.
+CASTERTON SCHOOL.
+ROE HEAD.
+HAWORTH PARSONAGE.
+THE BRONTE WATERFALL.
+FACSIMILE OF A SKETCH BY PATRICK BRANWELL BRONTE.
+
+*** The Volumes are also to be had in small post 8vo. limp cloth, price
+2s. 6d. each; or in small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with
+Frontispiece to each volume, cut or uncut edges, price 1s. 6d. each.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+POPULAR NOVELS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Each Work complete in One Volume, Crown 8vo._
+
+_price Six Shillings._
+
++NEW GRUB STREET.+ By GEORGE GISSING.
+
++EIGHT DAYS.+ By R. E. FORREST, Author of 'The Touchstone of Peril.'
+
++A DRAUGHT OF LETHE.+ By ROY TELLET, Author of 'The Outcasts' &c.
+
++THE RAJAH'S HEIR.+ By a New Author.
+
++THE PARIAH.+ By F. ANSTEY, Author of 'Vice Versa' &c.
+
++THYRZA.+ By GEORGE GISSING, Author of 'Demos' &c.
+
++THE NETHER WORLD.+ By GEORGE GISSING, Author of 'Demos' &c.
+
++ROBERT ELSMERE.+ By Mrs. HUMPHRY WARD, Author of 'Miss Bretherton' &c.
+
++RICHARD CABLE+: the Lightshipman. By the Author of 'Mehalah,' 'John
+Herring,' 'Court Royal,' &c.
+
++THE GAVEROCKS.+ By the Author of 'Mehalah,' 'John Herring,' 'Court
+Royal,' &c.
+
++DEMOS+: a Story of Socialist Life in England. By GEORGE GISSING, Author
+of 'Thyrza' &c.
+
++A FALLEN IDOL.+ By F. ANSTEY, Author of 'Vice Versa' &c.
+
++THE GIANT'S ROBE.+ By F. ANSTEY, Author of 'Vice Versa' &c.
+
++OLD KENSINGTON.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++THE VILLAGE ON THE CLIFF.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++FIVE OLD FRIENDS AND A YOUNG PRINCE.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++TO ESTHER, and other Sketches.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++BLUEBEARD'S KEYS, and other Stories.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++THE STORY OF ELIZABETH; TWO HOURS; FROM AN ISLAND.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++TOILERS AND SPINSTERS.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++MISS ANGEL; FULHAM LAWN.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++MISS WILLIAMSON'S DIVAGATIONS.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++MRS. DYMOND.+ By Miss THACKERAY.
+
++LLANALY REEFS.+ By Lady VERNEY, Author of 'Stone Edge' &c.
+
++LETTICE LISLE.+ By Lady VERNEY. With 3 Illustrations.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+
+POCKET EDITIONS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+W. M. THACKERAY'S WORKS.
+
+In Twenty-seven Volumes. Price 1_s._ 6_d._ each in half-cloth,
+cut or uncut edges; or 1_s._ in paper cover.
+
+*** _The set of Twenty-seven Volumes can also be had in a handsome
+ebonised case. Height is 17 inches, width 12 inches, depth 43/4 inches.
+Price L2. 12s. 6d._
+
+'A perfect and marvellously cheap edition.' Spectator.
+
+'Neat, handy, and pretty little books.' SATURDAY REVIEW.
+
+TITLES OF THE VOLUMES.
+
+VANITY FAIR. 2 vols.
+
+The HISTORY of PENDENNIS. 2 vols.
+
+The MEMOIRS of BARRY LYNDON:
+A Little Dinner at Timmins's.
+
+The NEWCOMES. 2 vols.
+
+The HISTORY of HENRY ESMOND.
+
+The VIRGINIANS. 2 vols.
+
+The ADVENTURES of PHILIP, to which is prefixed A SHABBY GENTEEL STORY.
+2 vols.
+
+The IRISH SKETCH-BOOK.
+
+The GREAT HOGGARTY DIAMOND. The HISTORY of the NEXT FRENCH REVOLUTION.
+CRUIKSHANK and LEECH. COX'S DIARY. The BEDFORD ROW CONSPIRACY.
+
+MAJOR GAHAGAN. The FATAL BOOTS. MEN'S WIVES. The SECOND FUNERAL of
+NAPOLEON.
+
+The YELLOWPLUSH PAPERS. CATHERINE.
+
+The FITZBOODLE PAPERS. CHARACTER SKETCHES. TALES. PAPERS by the FAT
+CONTRIBUTOR. Miss TICKLETOBY'S LECTURES on ENGLISH HISTORY.
+
+The BOOK of SNOBS. NOVELS by EMINENT HANDS. SULTAN STORK, and other
+Papers.
+
+LOVEL the WIDOWER. The WOLVES and the LAMB. NOTES of a JOURNEY from
+CORNHILL to GRAND CAIRO.
+
+BALLADS. A LEGEND of the RHINE. The DIARY of C. JEAMES DE LA PLUCHE,
+Esq., with his Letters.
+
+ROUNDABOUT PAPERS. LITTLE TRAVELS and ROADSIDE-SKETCHES.
+
+The CHRISTMAS BOOKS of Mr. M. A. TITMARSH. 2 vols. CONTENTS:--Mrs.
+Perkins' Ball--Our Street--Dr. Birch and his Young Friends--Rebecca and
+Rowena--The Rose and the Ring--The Kickleburys on the Rhine.
+
+SKETCHES and TRAVELS in LONDON; and MISCELLANEOUS CONTRIBUTIONS to
+'PUNCH.'
+
+The FOUR GEORGES; and The ENGLISH HUMORISTS of the EIGHTEENTH CENTURY.
+
+The PARIS SKETCH-BOOK; and A LECTURE on CHARITY and HUMOUR.
+
+DENIS DUVAL; and MISCELLANEOUS ESSAYS, SKETCHES, and REVIEWS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Small fcp. 8vo. half-cloth, cut or uncut edges, One Shilling.
+
+POEMS BY ELIZABETH BARRETT BROWNING.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut edges, price One
+Shilling.
+
+POCKET VOLUME OF SELECTIONS FROM THE POETICAL WORKS OF ROBERT BROWNING.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LIFE AND WORKS OF CHARLOTTE BRONTE
+
+(CURRER BELL) and her Sisters EMILY and ANNE BRONTE (ELLIS and ACTON
+BELL). Seven small Fcp. 8vo. Volumes, each containing a Frontispiece,
+bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut edges, price 1_s._ 6_d._ per
+volume.
+
+TITLES OF THE VOLUMES:--JANE EYRE.--SHIRLEY.--VILLETTE.--The PROFESSOR
+and POEMS.--WUTHERING HEIGHTS and AGNES GREY.--TENANT of WILDFELL
+HALL.--LIFE of CHARLOTTE BRONTE.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+MRS. GASKELL'S WORKS.
+
+Eight Volumes, small fcp. 8vo. bound in half-cloth, with cut or uncut
+edges, price 1_s._ 6_d._ per volume.
+
+TITLES OF THE VOLUMES:--WIVES and DAUGHTERS.--NORTH and SOUTH.--SYLVIA'S
+LOVERS.--CRANFORD, and other Tales.--MARY BARTON, and
+other Tales.--RUTH, and other Tales.--A DARK NIGHT'S WORK, and
+other Tales.--MY LADY LUDLOW, and other Tales.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+London: SMITH, ELDER, & CO., 15 Waterloo Place.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Talking Horse, by F. Anstey
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