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diff --git a/26867.txt b/26867.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..c595321 --- /dev/null +++ b/26867.txt @@ -0,0 +1,878 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of John Jones's Dollar, by Harry Stephen Keeler + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: John Jones's Dollar + +Author: Harry Stephen Keeler + +Release Date: October 10, 2008 [EBook #26867] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JOHN JONES'S DOLLAR *** + + + + +Produced by Greg Weeks, Stephen Blundell and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + + + +[Illustration] + +JOHN JONES'S DOLLAR + +By HARRY STEPHEN KEELER + + _Take a board with 64 squares on it. Put a grain of wheat on the + first square--two on the second--four on the third. Keep doubling in + this manner and you will find there isn't enough wheat in the world + to fill the sixty-fourth square. It can be the same with compound + interest._ + + +On the 201st day of the year 3221 A.D., the professor of history at the +University of Terra seated himself in front of the Visaphone and +prepared to deliver the daily lecture to his class, the members of which +resided in different portions of the earth. + +The instrument before which he seated himself was very like a great +window sash, on account of the fact that there were three or four +hundred frosted glass squares visible. In a space at the center, not +occupied by any of these glass squares, was a dark oblong area and a +ledge holding a piece of chalk. And above the area was a huge brass +cylinder; toward this brass cylinder the professor would soon direct +his subsequent remarks. + +In order to assure himself that it was time to press the button which +would notify the members of the class in history to approach their local +Visaphones, the professor withdrew from his vest pocket a small +contrivance which he held to his ear. Upon moving a tiny switch attached +to the instrument, a metallic voice, seeming to come from somewhere in +space, repeated mechanically: "Fifteen o'clock and one minute--fifteen +o'clock and one minute--fifteen o'clock and one min--" Quickly, the +professor replaced the instrument in his vest pocket and pressed a +button at the side of the Visaphone. + +As though in answer to the summons, the frosted squares began, one by +one, to show the faces and shoulders of a peculiar type of young men; +young men with great bulging foreheads, bald, toothless, and wearing +immense horn spectacles. One square, however, still remained empty. On +noticing this, a look of irritation passed over the professor's +countenance. + +But, seeing that every other glass square but this one was filled up, he +commenced to talk. + +"I am pleased, gentlemen, to see you all posted at your local Visaphones +this afternoon. I have prepared my lecture today upon a subject which +is, perhaps, of more economic interest than historical. Unlike the +previous lectures, my talk will not confine itself to the happenings of +a few years, but will gradually embrace the course of ten centuries, the +ten centuries, in fact, which terminated three hundred years before the +present date. My lecture will be an exposition of the effects of the +John Jones Dollar, originally deposited in the dawn of civilization, or +to be more precise, in the year of 1921--just thirteen hundred years +ago. This John Jon--" + +At this point in the professor's lecture, the frosted glass square which +hitherto had shown no image, now filled up. Sternly he gazed at the head +and shoulders that had just appeared. + +"B262H72476Male, you are late to class again. What excuse have you to +offer today?" + +From the hollow cylinder emanated a shrill voice, while the lips of the +picture on the glass square moved in unison with the words: + +"Professor, you will perceive by consulting your class book, that I have +recently taken up my residence near the North Pole. For some reason, +wireless communication between the Central Energy Station and all points +north of 89 degrees was cut off a while ago, on account of which fact I +could not appear in the Visaphone. Hence--" + +"Enough, sir," roared the professor. "Always ready with an excuse, +B262H72476Male. I shall immediately investigate your tale." + +From his coat pocket, the professor withdrew an instrument which, +although supplied with an earpiece and a mouthpiece, had no wires +whatever attached. Raising it to his lips, he spoke: + +"Hello. Central Energy Station, please." A pause ensued. "Central Energy +Station? This is the professor of history at the University of Terra, +speaking. One of my students informs me that the North Pole region was +out of communication with the Visaphone System this morning. Is that +statement true? I would--" + +A voice, apparently from nowhere, spoke into the professor's ear. "Quite +true, Professor. A train of our ether waves accidently fell into +parallelism with a train of waves from the Venus Substation. By the most +peculiar mischance, the two trains happened to be displaced, with +reference to each other, one half of a wave length, with the unfortunate +result that the negative points of one coincided with the positive +points of maximum amplitude of the other. Hence the two wave trains +nullified each other and communication ceased for one hundred and +eighty-five seconds--until the earth had revolved far enough to throw +them out of parallelism." + +"Ah! Thank you," replied the professor. He dropped his instrument into +his coat pocket and gazed in the direction of the glass square whose +image had so aroused his ire. "I apologize, B262H72476Male, for my +suspicions as to your veracity--but I had in mind several former +experiences." He shook a warning forefinger. "I will now resume my +talk." + +"A moment ago, gentlemen, I mentioned the John Jones Dollar. Some of you +who have just enrolled with the class will undoubtedly say to +yourselves: 'What is a John Jones? What is a Dollar?' + +"In the early days, before the present scientific registration of human +beings was instituted by the National Eugenics Society, man went around +under a crude multi-reduplicative system of nomenclature. Under this +system there were actually more John Joneses than there are calories in +a British Thermal Unit. But there was one John Jones, in particular, +living in the twentieth century, to whom I shall refer in my lecture. +Not much is known of his personal life except that he was an ardent +socialist--a bitter enemy, in fact, of the private ownership of wealth. + +"Now as to the Dollar. At this day, when the Psycho-Erg, a combination +of the Psych, the unit of esthetic satisfaction, and the Erg, the unit +of mechanical energy, is recognized as the true unit of value, it seems +difficult to believe that in the twentieth century and for more than ten +centuries thereafter, the Dollar, a metallic circular disk, was being +passed from hand to hand in exchange for the essentials of life. + +"But nevertheless, such was the case. Man exchanged his mental or +physical energy for these Dollars. He then re-exchanged the Dollars for +sustenance, raiment, pleasure, and operations for the removal of the +vermiform appendix. + +"A great many individuals, however, deposited their Dollars in a +stronghold called a bank. These banks invested the Dollars in loans and +commercial enterprises, with the result that, every time the earth +traversed the solar ecliptic, the banks compelled each borrower to +repay, or to acknowledge as due, the original loan, plus six +one-hundredths of that loan. And to the depositor, the banks paid three +one-hundredths of the deposited Dollars for the use of the disks. This +was known as three percent, or bank interest. + +"Now, the safety of Dollars, when deposited in banks, was not absolutely +assured to the depositor. At times, the custodians of these Dollars were +wont to appropriate them and proceed to portions of the earth, sparsely +inhabited and accessible with difficulty. And at other times, nomadic +groups known as 'yeggmen' visited the banks, opened the vaults by force, +and departed, carrying with them the contents. + +"But to return to our subject. In the year 1921, one of these numerous +John Joneses performed an apparently inconsequential action which caused +the name of John Jones to go down in history. What did he do? + +"He proceeded to one of these banks, known at that time as 'The First +National Bank of Chicago,' and deposited there, one of these disks--a +silver Dollar--to the credit of a certain individual. And this +individual to whose credit the Dollar was deposited was no other person +than the fortieth descendant of John Jones who stipulated in paper which +was placed in the files of the bank, that the descendancy was to take +place along the oldest child of each of the generations which would +constitute his posterity. + +"The bank accepted the Dollar under that understanding, together with +another condition imposed by this John Jones, namely, that the interest +was to be compounded annually. That meant that at the close of each +year, the bank was to credit the account of John Jones's fortieth +descendant with three one-hundredths of the account as it stood at the +beginning of the year. + +"History tells us little more concerning this John Jones--only that he +died in the year 1931, or ten years afterward, leaving several children. + +"Now you gentlemen who are taking mathematics under Professor +L127M72421Male, of the University of Mars, will remember that where any +number such as X, in passing through a progressive cycle of change, +grows at the end of that cycle by a proportion p, then the value of the +original X, after n cycles, becomes X(1 + p)^n. + +"Obviously, in this case, X equalled one Dollar; p equalled three +one-hundredths; and n will depend upon any number of years which we care +to consider, following the date of deposit. By a simple calculation, +those of you who are today mentally alert can check up the results that +I shall set forth in my lecture. + +"At the time that John Jones died, the amount in the First National Bank +of Chicago to the credit of John Jones the fortieth, was as follows." + +The professor seized the chalk and wrote rapidly upon the oblong space: + + 1931 10 years elapsed $1.34 + +"The peculiar sinuous hieroglyphic," he explained, "is an ideograph +representing the Dollar. + +"Well, gentlemen, time went on as time will, until a hundred years had +passed by. The First National Bank still existed, and the locality, +Chicago, had become the largest center of population upon the earth. +Through the investments which had taken place, and the yearly +compounding of interest, the status of John Jones's deposit was now as +follows." He wrote: + + 2021 100 years elapsed $19.10 + +"In the following century, many minor changes, of course, took place in +man's mode of living; but the so-called socialists still agitated widely +for the cessation of private ownership of wealth; the First National +Bank still accepted Dollars for safe keeping, and the John Jones Dollar +still continued to grow. With about thirty-four generations yet to come, +the account now stood: + + 2121 200 years elapsed $364 + +"And by the end of the succeeding hundred years, it had grown to what +constituted an appreciable bit of exchange value in those days--thus: + + 2221 300 years $6,920 + +"Now the century which followed contains an important date. The date I +am referring to is the year 2299 A.D., or the year in which every human +being born upon the globe was registered under a numerical name at the +central bureau of the National Eugenics Society. In our future lessons +which will treat with that period of detail, I shall ask you to memorize +that date. + +"The socialists still agitated, fruitlessly, but the First National Bank +of Chicago was now the first International Bank of the Earth. And how +great had John Jones's Dollar grown? Let us examine the account, both on +that important historical date, and also at the close of the 400th year +since it was deposited. Look: + + 2299 378 years $68,900 + 2321 400 years $132,000 + +"But gentlemen, it had not reached the point where it could be termed an +unusually large accumulation of wealth. For larger accumulations existed +upon the earth. A descendant of a man once known as John D. Rockefeller +possessed an accumulation of great size, but which, as a matter of +fact, was rapidly dwindling as it passed from generation to generation. +So, let us travel ahead another one hundred years. During this time, as +we learn from our historical and political archives, the socialists +began to die out, since they at last realized the utter futility of +combating the balance of power. The account, though, now stood: + + 2421 500 years $2,520,000 + +"It is hardly necessary for me to make any comment. Those of you who are +most astute, and others of you who flunked my course before and are now +taking it the second time, of course know what is coming. + +"During the age in which this John Jones lived, there lived also a man, +a so-called scientist called Metchnikoff. We know, from a study of our +vast collection of Egyptian Papyri and Carnegie Library books, that this +Metchnikoff promulgated the theory that old age--or rather senility--was +caused by colon-bacillus. This fact was later verified. But while he was +correct in the etiology of senility, he was crudely primeval in the +therapeutics of it. + +"He proposed, gentlemen, to combat and kill this bacillus by utilizing +the fermented lacteal fluid from a now extinct animal called the cow, +models of which you can see at any time at the Solaris Museum." + +A chorus of shrill, piping laughter emanated from the brass cylinder. +The professor waited until the merriment had subsided and then +continued: + +"I beg of you, gentlemen, do not smile. This was merely one of the many +similar quaint superstitions existing in that age. + +"But a real scientist, Professor K122B62411Male, again attacked the +problem in the twenty-fifth century. Since the cow was now extinct, he +could not waste his valuable time experimenting with fermented cow +lacteal fluid. He discovered the old _v_-rays of Radium--the rays which +you physicists will remember are not deflected by a magnetic field--were +really composed of two sets of rays, which he termed the _g_ rays and +the _e_ rays. These last named rays--only when isolated--completely +devitalized all colon-bacilli which lay in their path, without in the +least affecting the integrity of any interposed organic cells. The great +result, as many of you already know, was that the life of man was +extended to nearly two hundred years. That, I state unequivocally, was a +great century for the human race. + + * * * * * + +"But I spoke of another happening--one, perhaps, of more interest than +importance. I referred to the bank account of John Jones the fortieth. +It, gentlemen, had grown to such a prodigious sum that a special bank +and board of directors had to be created in order to care for, and +reinvest it. By scanning the following notation, you will perceive the +truth of my statement: + + 2521 600 years $47,900,000 + +"By the year 2621 A.D., two events of stupendous importance took place. +There is scarcely a man in this class who has not heard of how Professor +P222D29333Male accidentally stumbled upon the scientific fact that the +effect of gravity is reversed upon any body which vibrates +perpendicularly to the plane of the ecliptic with a frequency which is +an even multiple of the logarithm of 2 of the Naperian base 'e.' At +once, special vibrating cars were constructed which carried mankind to +all planets. That discovery of Professor P222D29333Male did nothing less +than open up seven new territories to our inhabitants; namely: Mercury, +Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune. In the great land +rush that ensued, thousands who were previously poor became rich. + +"But, gentlemen, land which so far had been constituted one of the main +sources of wealth, was shortly to become valuable for individual golf +links only, as it is today, on account of another scientific discovery. + +"This second discovery was in reality, not a discovery, but the +perfection of a chemical process, the principles of which had been known +for many centuries. I am alluding to the construction of the vast +reducing factories, one upon each planet, to which the bodies of all +persons who have died on their respective planets are at once shipped by +Aerial Express. Since this process is used today, all of you understand +the methods employed; how each body is reduced by heat to its component +constituents: hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen, carbon, calcium, phosphorus, +and so forth; how these separated constituents are stored in special +reservoirs together with the components from thousands of other corpses; +how these elements are then synthetically combined into food tablets for +those of us who are yet alive--thus completing an endless chain from the +dead to the living. Naturally then, agriculture and stock-raising +ceased, since the food problem, with which man had coped from time +immemorial, was solved. The two direct results were, first--that land +lost the inflated values it had possessed when it was necessary for +tillage, and second--that men were at last given enough leisure to enter +the fields of science and art. + +"And as to the John Jones Dollar, which now embraced countless +industries and vast territory on the earth, it stood, in value: + + 2621 700 years $912,000,000 + +"In truth, gentlemen, it now constituted the largest private fortune on +the terrestrial globe. And in that year, 2621 A.D., there were thirteen +generations yet to come, before John Jones the fortieth would arrive. + +"To continue. In the year 2721 A.D., an important political battle was +concluded in the Solar System Senate and House of Representatives. I am +referring to the great controversy as to whether the Earth's moon was a +sufficient menace to interplanetary navigation to warrant its removal. +The outcome of the wrangle was that the question was decided in the +affirmative. Consequently-- + +"But I beg your pardon, young men. I occasionally lose sight of the fact +that you are not so well informed upon historical matters as myself. +Here I am, talking to you about the moon, totally forgetful that many of +you are puzzled as to my meaning. I advise all of you who have not yet +attended the Solaris Museum on Jupiter, to take a trip there some Sunday +afternoon. The Interplanetary Suburban Line runs trains every half hour +on that day. You will find there a complete working model of the old +satellite of the Earth, which, before it was destroyed, furnished this +planet light at night through the crude medium of reflection. + +"On account of this decision as to the inadvisability of allowing the +moon to remain where it was, engineers commenced its removal in the year +2721. Piece by piece, it was chipped away and brought to the Earth in +Interplanetary freight cars. These pieces were then propelled by +Zoodolite explosive, in the direction of the Milky Way, with a velocity +of 11,217 meters per second. This velocity, of course, gave each +departing fragment exactly the amount of kinetic energy it required to +enable it to overcome the backward pull of the Earth from here to +infinity. I dare say those moon-hunks are going yet. + +"At the start of the removal of the moon in 2721 A.D., the accumulated +wealth of John Jones the fortieth, stood: + + 2721 800 years $17,400,000,000 + +"Of course, with such a colossal sum at their command, the directors of +the fund had made extensive investments on Mars and Venus. + +"By the end of the twenty-eighth century, or the year 2807 A.D., the +moon had been completely hacked away and sent piecemeal into space, the +job having required 86 years. I give, herewith, the result of John +Jones's Dollar, both at the date when the moon was completely removed +and also at the close of the 900th year after its deposit: + + 2807 886 years $219,000,000,000 + 2821 900 years $332,000,000,000 + +"The meaning of those figures, gentlemen, as stated in simple language, +was that the John Jones Dollar now comprised practically all the wealth +on Earth, Mars, and Venus--with the exception of one university site on +each planet, which was, of course, school property. + +"And now I will ask you to advance with me to the year 2906 A.D. In this +year the directors of the John Jones fund awoke to the fact that they +were in a dreadful predicament. According to the agreement under which +John Jones deposited his Dollar away back in the year 1921, interest was +to be compounded annually at three percent. In the year 2900 A.D., the +thirty-ninth generation of John Jones was alive, being represented by a +gentleman named J664M42721Male, who was thirty years of age and engaged +to be married to a young lady named T246M42652Female. + +"Doubtless, you will ask, what was the predicament in which the +directors found themselves. Simply this: + +"A careful appraisement of the wealth on Neptune, Uranus, Saturn, +Jupiter, Mars, Venus, and Mercury, and likewise Earth, together with an +accurate calculation of the remaining heat in the Sun and an +appraisement of that heat at a very decent valuation per calorie, +demonstrated that the total wealth of the Solar System amounted to +$6,309,525,241,362.15. + +"But unfortunately, a simple computation showed that if Mr. +J664M42721Male married Miss T246M42652Female, and was blessed by a child +by the year 2921, which year marked the thousandth year since the +deposit of the John Jones Dollar, then in that year there would be due +the child, the following amount: + + 2921 1,000 years $6,310,000,000,000 + +"It simply showed beyond all possibility of argument, that by 2921 A.D., +we would be $474,758,637.85 shy--that we would be unable to meet the +debt to John Jones the fortieth. + +"I tell you, gentlemen, the Board of Directors was frantic. Such wild +suggestions were put forth as the sending of an expeditionary force to +the nearest star in order to capture some other Solar System and thus +obtain more territory to make up the deficit. But that project was +impossible on account of the number of years that it would have +required. + +"Visions of immense law suits disturbed the slumber of those unfortunate +individuals who formed the John Jones Dollar Directorship. But on the +brink of one of the biggest civil actions the courts had ever known, +something occurred that altered everything." + +The professor again withdrew the tiny instrument from his vest pocket, +held it to his ear and adjusted the switch. A metallic voice rasped: +"Fifteen o'clock and fifty-two minutes--fifteen o'clock and fifty-two +minutes--fift--" He replaced the instrument and went on with his talk. + +"I must hasten to the conclusion of my lecture, gentlemen, as I have an +engagement with Professor C122B24999Male of the University of Saturn at +sixteen o'clock. Now, let me see; I was discussing the big civil action +that was hanging over the heads of the John Jones Dollar directors. + +"Well, this Mr. J664M42721Male, the thirty-ninth descendant of the +original John Jones, had a lover's quarrel with Miss T246M42652Female, +which immediately destroyed the probability of their marriage. Neither +gave in to the other. Neither ever married. And when Mr. J664M42721Male +died in 2946 A.D., of a broken heart, as it was claimed, he was single +and childless. + +"As a result, there was no one to turn the Solar System over to. +Immediately, the Interplanetary Government stepped in and took +possession of it. At that instant, of course, private property ceased. +In the twinkling of an eye almost, we reached the true socialistic and +democratic condition for which man had futilely hoped throughout the +ages. + +"That is all today, gentlemen. Class is dismissed." + +One by one, the faces faded from the Visaphone. + +For a moment, the professor stood ruminating. + +"A wonderful man, that old socialist, John Jones the first," he said +softly to himself, "a farseeing man, a bright man, considering that he +lived in such a dark era as the twentieth century. But how nearly his +well-contrived scheme went wrong. Suppose that fortieth descendant had +been born?" + + +THE END + + + + +Transcriber's Note: + + This etext was produced from _Amazing Stories_ April 1956 and was + first published in _Amazing Stories_ April 1927. Extensive research + did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this + publication was renewed. Minor spelling and typographical errors + have been corrected without note. + + The original equation given, x (1 + p)n, has been corrected to show + the 'n' as superscript: X(1 + p)^n. + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's John Jones's Dollar, by Harry Stephen Keeler + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JOHN JONES'S DOLLAR *** + +***** This file should be named 26867.txt or 26867.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/2/6/8/6/26867/ + +Produced by Greg Weeks, Stephen Blundell and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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