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+Project Gutenberg's The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband, by Mary B. Little
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband
+
+Author: Mary B. Little
+
+Release Date: August 26, 2008 [EBook #26437]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Delphine Lettau, Emmy and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive/American Libraries.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND
+
+MARY B. LITTLE
+
+[Illustration: ARTI et VERITATI]
+
+          BOSTON
+          RICHARD G. BADGER
+          =The Gorham Press=
+          1908
+
+          _Copyright, 1908, by Mary B. Little_
+
+          _All Rights Reserved_
+
+          _The Gorham Press, Boston, U. S. A._
+
+
+
+
+THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND
+
+
+                           I
+
+          I wake, the Sun does scatter into Flight
+          The Dreams of Happiness I have each Night,
+            O blessèd Dreams--full of Domestic Bliss,
+          Too soon alas! They're banished with the Light.
+
+
+                           II
+
+          I'm going to tell in just the Briefest way
+          The cause of all my Anguish--if I may--
+            Then one and all will know the Reason why
+          My Mien is Solemn, and I am not Gay.
+
+
+                           III
+
+          On Christmas day a good Friend did present
+          My Wife a Book; no doubt with best intent.
+            The "Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam" 'twas.
+          Little I dreamed the Woe of its Advent.
+
+
+                           IV
+
+          After the rush of Holidays was o'er,
+          And things had settled back in Place once more,
+            Wife found the Time to revel in that Book,
+          And told me how she loved its Ancient Lore.
+
+
+                           V
+
+          She soon possessed the dreadful Omar Fad,
+          Which other Husbands, I have learned, think Bad.
+            But unlike other Fads which now are Past,
+          This has the power to make me very Mad.
+
+
+                           VI
+
+          The others which she tired of years before,--
+          Collecting Vases, Fans, and Spoons galore,--
+            Did not affect the Comfort of our Home,
+          Therefore there was no reason to be Sore.
+
+
+                           VII
+
+          But now each time I come back to the House
+          I find what was my former loving Spouse
+            So deep absorbed in Omar's Rubaiyat,
+          She reads right on, and scarcely does Arouse.
+
+
+                           VIII
+
+          Or else I find her with her Pen in Hand,
+          Grinding out Quatrains which mayhap are Grand,
+            She tries to make me Listen: Rest assured
+          That I obey Not any such Command.
+
+
+                           IX
+
+          Had I but known just what my Fate would be,
+          Inside a Drawer to which I hold the Key,
+            That Book forever would have Disappeared
+          And thereby would have gained some Peace for Me.
+
+
+                           X
+
+          But ah, the Irony of Fate--that's how
+          "A Book of verses underneath the Bough"
+            Is what I hear from Morn to Dewy Eve.
+          A Wilderness _were_ Paradise just Now.
+
+
+                           XI
+
+          Sometimes when I am very tired, and Plead
+          To be amused, My Wife says, "I will read."
+            And this is what she tries to make me Hear,
+          "With Earth's first Clay they did the Last man knead."
+
+
+                           XII
+
+          But don't imagine while Possessed of Wit,
+          That I assent, and therefore Calmly sit.
+            I take my hat, and hasten from the House,
+          And come not back till think she's through with It.
+
+
+                           XIII
+
+          I might have Prayed, and possibly thereby
+          Have gained relief from Somewhere in the Sky.
+            But Wife says, Omar's reckoning proves it
+          "As Impotently moves as You or I."
+
+
+                           XIV
+
+          At least that is the Doctrine he presents,
+          Although to Me it is Devoid of Sense.
+            My unbelief in what he says does Make
+          My Wife's Love for him only more Intense.
+
+
+                           XV
+
+          And thus it is--the Rubaiyat's her Creed.
+          It is her Comfort in all sorts of Need.
+            I tear my hair--I storm--I swear, and yet,
+          'Tis only to dear Omar she pays Heed.
+
+
+                           XVI
+
+          "Some for the Glories of this world; and some
+          Sigh for the Prophet's Paradise to Come;"
+            The greatest Boon I ask for is, I may
+          Supplant this Interloper as a Chum.
+
+
+                           XVII
+
+          Now all the Years that we have Wedded been,
+          Not once had Demon Jealousy crept in
+            Until this Omar--dead eight Hundred Years,
+          Did come and her Affection from me Win.
+
+
+                           XVIII
+
+          I feel chagrined to Think, at this late Date,
+          A Man so long since Dead can alienate
+            The fond Devotion that's been mine alone.
+          No Wonder I cry out 'gainst such a Fate.
+
+
+                           XIX
+
+          "The Worldly Hope men set their Hearts upon
+          Turns Ashes--or it prospers; and anon,"
+            Just so those happy Days of long ago
+          Were Mine, for one sweet space of Time then gone.
+
+
+                           XX
+
+          The last few Months I eagerly frequent
+          My Clubs; wherein I hear great Argument
+            Regarding Wives, and how to manage them.
+          But come no Wiser than when in I went.
+
+
+                           XXI
+
+          Strange, is it not? Of all the Husbands who
+          Before me passed this Door of Trouble through
+            Not One has left a word of good Advice,
+          Nor e'en suggested what is Best to do.
+
+
+                           XXII
+
+          My Friends can't help me, yet they laugh to Scorn
+          My downcast looks, and at the way I Mourn.
+            They do not know the Anguish of my Soul,
+          Bereft of Wife--unhappy--and forlorn.
+
+
+                           XXIII
+
+          But this I know, whether the one True Light
+          Kindle to Love, or wrath consume me quite,
+            I'd rather have my former Happiness,
+          Than to Possess the Whole great World outright.
+
+
+                           XXIV
+
+          I oft' attempt to show Wife where 'twill Lead.
+          She gets her Book, and says I must take Heed
+            That--"The first Morning of Creation wrote
+          What the last Dawn of reckoning shall Read."
+
+
+                           XXV
+
+          One day I queried would she please to Say
+          How long, how long this Fad was apt to Stay?
+            She smiled and said, "My dear, don't fret about
+          'Unborn To-Morrow and Dead Yesterday.'"
+
+
+                           XXVI
+
+          "'The Moving Finger writes, and having Writ
+          Moves on.'" "And surely, dear, you have the Grit
+            To be submissive to the Hand of Fate,
+          When you can't help yourself a single Bit."
+
+
+                           XXVII
+
+          PREDESTINATION--full of Unbelief--
+          Must I accept it, is there no Relief?
+            The very thought of it most drives me Mad,
+          And bows me to the very Earth with Grief.
+
+
+                           XXVIII
+
+          Ah, if I only could some way Conspire
+          "To grasp the sorry Scheme of Things entire";
+            How soon I'd shatter it to bits--and then
+          Remould it nearer to my Heart's desire.
+
+
+                           XXIX
+
+          Or, would some Wingèd Angel ere too Late
+          "Arrest the yet unfolded Roll of Fate"
+            And make the stern Recorder change the lines,
+          And thus restore at ONCE to me My Mate.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband, by Mary B. Little
+
+*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND ***
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+
+Project Gutenberg's The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband, by Mary B. Little
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband
+
+Author: Mary B. Little
+
+Release Date: August 26, 2008 [EBook #26437]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Delphine Lettau, Emmy and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive/American Libraries.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<h1>THE RUBAIYAT OF A<br />
+HUFFY HUSBAND</h1>
+
+<h2>MARY B. LITTLE</h2>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 155px;">
+<img src="images/emblem.png" width="155" height="200" alt="ARTI et VERITATI" title="ARTI et VERITATI" />
+</div>
+
+<div class='center'>
+BOSTON<br />
+RICHARD G. BADGER<br />
+<b>The Gorham Press</b><br />
+<small>1908</small><br />
+</div>
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<div class='copyright'>
+<i>Copyright, 1908, by Mary B. Little</i><br />
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;<br />
+<i>All Rights Reserved</i><br />
+<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
+<i>The Gorham Press, Boston, U. S. A.</i><br />
+</div>
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[1]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND</h2>
+
+
+
+
+<h3>I</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+I wake, the Sun does scatter into Flight<br />
+The Dreams of Happiness I have each Night,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">O bless&egrave;d Dreams&mdash;full of Domestic Bliss,</span><br />
+Too soon alas! They're banished with the Light.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[2]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>II</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+I'm going to tell in just the Briefest way<br />
+The cause of all my Anguish&mdash;if I may&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Then one and all will know the Reason why</span><br />
+My Mien is Solemn, and I am not Gay.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[3]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>III</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+On Christmas day a good Friend did present<br />
+My Wife a Book; no doubt with best intent.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The "Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam" 'twas.</span><br />
+Little I dreamed the Woe of its Advent.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[4]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>IV</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+After the rush of Holidays was o'er,<br />
+And things had settled back in Place once more,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Wife found the Time to revel in that Book,</span><br />
+And told me how she loved its Ancient Lore.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[5]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+
+<h3>V</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+She soon possessed the dreadful Omar Fad,<br />
+Which other Husbands, I have learned, think Bad.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But unlike other Fads which now are Past,</span><br />
+This has the power to make me very Mad.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[6]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>VI</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+The others which she tired of years before,&mdash;<br />
+Collecting Vases, Fans, and Spoons galore,&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Did not affect the Comfort of our Home,</span><br />
+Therefore there was no reason to be Sore.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[7]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>VII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+But now each time I come back to the House<br />
+I find what was my former loving Spouse<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So deep absorbed in Omar's Rubaiyat,</span><br />
+She reads right on, and scarcely does Arouse.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[8]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>VIII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+Or else I find her with her Pen in Hand,<br />
+Grinding out Quatrains which mayhap are Grand,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">She tries to make me Listen: Rest assured</span><br />
+That I obey Not any such Command.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[9]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>IX</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+Had I but known just what my Fate would be,<br />
+Inside a Drawer to which I hold the Key,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That Book forever would have Disappeared</span><br />
+And thereby would have gained some Peace for Me.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[10]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>X</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+But ah, the Irony of Fate&mdash;that's how<br />
+"A Book of verses underneath the Bough"<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is what I hear from Morn to Dewy Eve.</span><br />
+A Wilderness <i>were</i> Paradise just Now.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[11]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XI</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+Sometimes when I am very tired, and Plead<br />
+To be amused, My Wife says, "I will read."<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And this is what she tries to make me Hear,</span><br />
+"With Earth's first Clay they did the Last man knead."<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+But don't imagine while Possessed of Wit,<br />
+That I assent, and therefore Calmly sit.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I take my hat, and hasten from the House,</span><br />
+And come not back till think she's through with It.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XIII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+I might have Prayed, and possibly thereby<br />
+Have gained relief from Somewhere in the Sky.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But Wife says, Omar's reckoning proves it</span><br />
+"As Impotently moves as You or I."<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XIV</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+At least that is the Doctrine he presents,<br />
+Although to Me it is Devoid of Sense.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">My unbelief in what he says does Make</span><br />
+My Wife's Love for him only more Intense.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[15]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XV</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+And thus it is&mdash;the Rubaiyat's her Creed.<br />
+It is her Comfort in all sorts of Need.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I tear my hair&mdash;I storm&mdash;I swear, and yet,</span><br />
+'Tis only to dear Omar she pays Heed.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[16]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XVI</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"Some for the Glories of this world; and some<br />
+Sigh for the Prophet's Paradise to Come;"<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The greatest Boon I ask for is, I may</span><br />
+Supplant this Interloper as a Chum.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[17]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XVII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+Now all the Years that we have Wedded been,<br />
+Not once had Demon Jealousy crept in<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Until this Omar&mdash;dead eight Hundred Years,</span><br />
+Did come and her Affection from me Win.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[18]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XVIII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+I feel chagrined to Think, at this late Date,<br />
+A Man so long since Dead can alienate<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The fond Devotion that's been mine alone.</span><br />
+No Wonder I cry out 'gainst such a Fate.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[19]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XIX</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"The Worldly Hope men set their Hearts upon<br />
+Turns Ashes&mdash;or it prospers; and anon,"<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Just so those happy Days of long ago</span><br />
+Were Mine, for one sweet space of Time then gone.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[20]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XX</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+The last few Months I eagerly frequent<br />
+My Clubs; wherein I hear great Argument<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Regarding Wives, and how to manage them.</span><br />
+But come no Wiser than when in I went.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[21]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXI</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+Strange, is it not? Of all the Husbands who<br />
+Before me passed this Door of Trouble through<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Not One has left a word of good Advice,</span><br />
+Nor e'en suggested what is Best to do.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[22]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+My Friends can't help me, yet they laugh to Scorn<br />
+My downcast looks, and at the way I Mourn.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They do not know the Anguish of my Soul,</span><br />
+Bereft of Wife&mdash;unhappy&mdash;and forlorn.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[23]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXIII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+But this I know, whether the one True Light<br />
+Kindle to Love, or wrath consume me quite,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I'd rather have my former Happiness,</span><br />
+Than to Possess the Whole great World outright.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[24]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXIV</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+I oft' attempt to show Wife where 'twill Lead.<br />
+She gets her Book, and says I must take Heed<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That&mdash;"The first Morning of Creation wrote</span><br />
+What the last Dawn of reckoning shall Read."<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[25]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXV</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+One day I queried would she please to Say<br />
+How long, how long this Fad was apt to Stay?<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">She smiled and said, "My dear, don't fret about</span><br />
+'Unborn To-Morrow and Dead Yesterday.'"<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[26]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXVI</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+"'The Moving Finger writes, and having Writ<br />
+Moves on.'" "And surely, dear, you have the Grit<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To be submissive to the Hand of Fate,</span><br />
+When you can't help yourself a single Bit."<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[27]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXVII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+PREDESTINATION&mdash;full of Unbelief&mdash;<br />
+Must I accept it, is there no Relief?<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The very thought of it most drives me Mad,</span><br />
+And bows me to the very Earth with Grief.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[28]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXVIII</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+Ah, if I only could some way Conspire<br />
+"To grasp the sorry Scheme of Things entire";<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">How soon I'd shatter it to bits&mdash;and then</span><br />
+Remould it nearer to my Heart's desire.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[29]</a></span></p>
+
+
+
+<h3>XXIX</h3>
+
+<div class='poem'>
+Or, would some Wing&egrave;d Angel ere too Late<br />
+"Arrest the yet unfolded Roll of Fate"<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And make the stern Recorder change the lines,</span><br />
+And thus restore at ONCE to me My Mate.<br />
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband, by Mary B. Little
+
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+</body>
+</html>
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+Project Gutenberg's The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband, by Mary B. Little
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+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
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+Title: The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband
+
+Author: Mary B. Little
+
+Release Date: August 26, 2008 [EBook #26437]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND ***
+
+
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+Produced by Delphine Lettau, Emmy and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive/American Libraries.)
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+
+THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND
+
+MARY B. LITTLE
+
+[Illustration: ARTI et VERITATI]
+
+          BOSTON
+          RICHARD G. BADGER
+          =The Gorham Press=
+          1908
+
+          _Copyright, 1908, by Mary B. Little_
+
+          _All Rights Reserved_
+
+          _The Gorham Press, Boston, U. S. A._
+
+
+
+
+THE RUBAIYAT OF A HUFFY HUSBAND
+
+
+                           I
+
+          I wake, the Sun does scatter into Flight
+          The Dreams of Happiness I have each Night,
+            O blessed Dreams--full of Domestic Bliss,
+          Too soon alas! They're banished with the Light.
+
+
+                           II
+
+          I'm going to tell in just the Briefest way
+          The cause of all my Anguish--if I may--
+            Then one and all will know the Reason why
+          My Mien is Solemn, and I am not Gay.
+
+
+                           III
+
+          On Christmas day a good Friend did present
+          My Wife a Book; no doubt with best intent.
+            The "Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam" 'twas.
+          Little I dreamed the Woe of its Advent.
+
+
+                           IV
+
+          After the rush of Holidays was o'er,
+          And things had settled back in Place once more,
+            Wife found the Time to revel in that Book,
+          And told me how she loved its Ancient Lore.
+
+
+                           V
+
+          She soon possessed the dreadful Omar Fad,
+          Which other Husbands, I have learned, think Bad.
+            But unlike other Fads which now are Past,
+          This has the power to make me very Mad.
+
+
+                           VI
+
+          The others which she tired of years before,--
+          Collecting Vases, Fans, and Spoons galore,--
+            Did not affect the Comfort of our Home,
+          Therefore there was no reason to be Sore.
+
+
+                           VII
+
+          But now each time I come back to the House
+          I find what was my former loving Spouse
+            So deep absorbed in Omar's Rubaiyat,
+          She reads right on, and scarcely does Arouse.
+
+
+                           VIII
+
+          Or else I find her with her Pen in Hand,
+          Grinding out Quatrains which mayhap are Grand,
+            She tries to make me Listen: Rest assured
+          That I obey Not any such Command.
+
+
+                           IX
+
+          Had I but known just what my Fate would be,
+          Inside a Drawer to which I hold the Key,
+            That Book forever would have Disappeared
+          And thereby would have gained some Peace for Me.
+
+
+                           X
+
+          But ah, the Irony of Fate--that's how
+          "A Book of verses underneath the Bough"
+            Is what I hear from Morn to Dewy Eve.
+          A Wilderness _were_ Paradise just Now.
+
+
+                           XI
+
+          Sometimes when I am very tired, and Plead
+          To be amused, My Wife says, "I will read."
+            And this is what she tries to make me Hear,
+          "With Earth's first Clay they did the Last man knead."
+
+
+                           XII
+
+          But don't imagine while Possessed of Wit,
+          That I assent, and therefore Calmly sit.
+            I take my hat, and hasten from the House,
+          And come not back till think she's through with It.
+
+
+                           XIII
+
+          I might have Prayed, and possibly thereby
+          Have gained relief from Somewhere in the Sky.
+            But Wife says, Omar's reckoning proves it
+          "As Impotently moves as You or I."
+
+
+                           XIV
+
+          At least that is the Doctrine he presents,
+          Although to Me it is Devoid of Sense.
+            My unbelief in what he says does Make
+          My Wife's Love for him only more Intense.
+
+
+                           XV
+
+          And thus it is--the Rubaiyat's her Creed.
+          It is her Comfort in all sorts of Need.
+            I tear my hair--I storm--I swear, and yet,
+          'Tis only to dear Omar she pays Heed.
+
+
+                           XVI
+
+          "Some for the Glories of this world; and some
+          Sigh for the Prophet's Paradise to Come;"
+            The greatest Boon I ask for is, I may
+          Supplant this Interloper as a Chum.
+
+
+                           XVII
+
+          Now all the Years that we have Wedded been,
+          Not once had Demon Jealousy crept in
+            Until this Omar--dead eight Hundred Years,
+          Did come and her Affection from me Win.
+
+
+                           XVIII
+
+          I feel chagrined to Think, at this late Date,
+          A Man so long since Dead can alienate
+            The fond Devotion that's been mine alone.
+          No Wonder I cry out 'gainst such a Fate.
+
+
+                           XIX
+
+          "The Worldly Hope men set their Hearts upon
+          Turns Ashes--or it prospers; and anon,"
+            Just so those happy Days of long ago
+          Were Mine, for one sweet space of Time then gone.
+
+
+                           XX
+
+          The last few Months I eagerly frequent
+          My Clubs; wherein I hear great Argument
+            Regarding Wives, and how to manage them.
+          But come no Wiser than when in I went.
+
+
+                           XXI
+
+          Strange, is it not? Of all the Husbands who
+          Before me passed this Door of Trouble through
+            Not One has left a word of good Advice,
+          Nor e'en suggested what is Best to do.
+
+
+                           XXII
+
+          My Friends can't help me, yet they laugh to Scorn
+          My downcast looks, and at the way I Mourn.
+            They do not know the Anguish of my Soul,
+          Bereft of Wife--unhappy--and forlorn.
+
+
+                           XXIII
+
+          But this I know, whether the one True Light
+          Kindle to Love, or wrath consume me quite,
+            I'd rather have my former Happiness,
+          Than to Possess the Whole great World outright.
+
+
+                           XXIV
+
+          I oft' attempt to show Wife where 'twill Lead.
+          She gets her Book, and says I must take Heed
+            That--"The first Morning of Creation wrote
+          What the last Dawn of reckoning shall Read."
+
+
+                           XXV
+
+          One day I queried would she please to Say
+          How long, how long this Fad was apt to Stay?
+            She smiled and said, "My dear, don't fret about
+          'Unborn To-Morrow and Dead Yesterday.'"
+
+
+                           XXVI
+
+          "'The Moving Finger writes, and having Writ
+          Moves on.'" "And surely, dear, you have the Grit
+            To be submissive to the Hand of Fate,
+          When you can't help yourself a single Bit."
+
+
+                           XXVII
+
+          PREDESTINATION--full of Unbelief--
+          Must I accept it, is there no Relief?
+            The very thought of it most drives me Mad,
+          And bows me to the very Earth with Grief.
+
+
+                           XXVIII
+
+          Ah, if I only could some way Conspire
+          "To grasp the sorry Scheme of Things entire";
+            How soon I'd shatter it to bits--and then
+          Remould it nearer to my Heart's desire.
+
+
+                           XXIX
+
+          Or, would some Winged Angel ere too Late
+          "Arrest the yet unfolded Roll of Fate"
+            And make the stern Recorder change the lines,
+          And thus restore at ONCE to me My Mate.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's The Rubaiyat of a Huffy Husband, by Mary B. Little
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+jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize
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+status under the laws that apply to them.
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #26437 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/26437)