initial commit of ebook 2566HEADmain

1 files changed, 1321 insertions, 0 deletions

diff --git a/2566.txt b/2566.txt
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1076dcf
--- /dev/null
+++ b/2566.txt
@@ -0,0 +1,1321 @@
+The Project Gutenberg eBook, How to Fail in Literature, by Andrew Lang
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: How to Fail in Literature
+
+
+Author: Andrew Lang
+
+Release Date: May 11, 2005  [eBook #2566]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII)
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK HOW TO FAIL IN LITERATURE***
+
+
+
+
+
+
+Transcribed from the 1890 Field & Tuer edition by David Price, email
+ccx074@coventry.ac.uk
+
+
+
+
+
+HOW TO FAIL IN LITERATURE: A LECTURE BY ANDREW LANG
+
+
+PREFACE
+
+
+_This Lecture was delivered at the South Kensington Museum, in aid of the
+College for Working Men and Women.  As the Publishers, perhaps
+erroneously, believe that some of the few authors who were not present
+may be glad to study the advice here proffered, the Lecture is now
+printed.  It has been practically re-written, and, like the kiss which
+the Lady returned to Rodolphe_, is revu, corrige, et considerablement
+augmente.
+
+A. L.
+
+
+
+
+HOW TO FAIL IN LITERATURE
+
+
+What should be a man's or a woman's reason for taking literature as a
+vocation, what sort of success ought they to desire, what sort of
+ambition should possess them?  These are natural questions, now that so
+many readers exist in the world, all asking for something new, now that
+so many writers are making their pens "in running to devour the way" over
+so many acres of foolscap.  The legitimate reasons for enlisting (too
+often without receiving the shilling) in this army of writers are not far
+to seek.  A man may be convinced that he has useful, or beautiful, or
+entertaining ideas within him, he may hold that he can express them in
+fresh and charming language.  He may, in short, have a "vocation," or
+feel conscious of a vocation, which is not exactly the same thing.  There
+are "many thyrsus bearers, few mystics," many are called, few chosen.
+Still, to be sensible of a vocation is something, nay, is much, for most
+of us drift without any particular aim or predominant purpose.  Nobody
+can justly censure people whose chief interest is in letters, whose chief
+pleasure is in study or composition, who rejoice in a fine sentence as
+others do in a well modelled limb, or a delicately touched landscape,
+nobody can censure them for trying their fortunes in literature.  Most of
+them will fail, for, as the bookseller's young man told an author once,
+they have the poetic temperament, without the poetic power.  Still among
+these whom _Pendennis_ has tempted, in boyhood, to run away from school
+to literature as Marryat has tempted others to run away to sea, there
+must be some who will succeed.  But an early and intense ambition is not
+everything, any more than a capacity for taking pains is everything in
+literature or in any art.
+
+Some have the gift, the natural incommunicable power, without the
+ambition, others have the ambition but no other gift from any Muse.  This
+class is the more numerous, but the smallest class of all has both the
+power and the will to excel in letters.  The desire to write, the love of
+letters may shew itself in childhood, in boyhood, or youth, and mean
+nothing at all, a mere harvest of barren blossom without fragrance or
+fruit.  Or, again, the concern about letters may come suddenly, when a
+youth that cared for none of those things is waning, it may come when a
+man suddenly finds that he has something which he really must tell.  Then
+he probably fumbles about for a style, and his first fresh impulses are
+more or less marred by his inexperience of an art which beguiles and
+fascinates others even in their school-days.
+
+It is impossible to prophesy the success of a man of letters from his
+early promise, his early tastes; as impossible as it is to predict, from
+her childish grace, the beauty of a woman.
+
+But the following remarks on How to fail in Literature are certainly
+meant to discourage nobody who loves books, and has an impulse to tell a
+story, or to try a song or a sermon.  Discouragements enough exist in the
+pursuit of this, as of all arts, crafts, and professions, without my
+adding to them.  Famine and Fear crouch by the portals of literature as
+they crouch at the gates of the Virgilian Hades.  There is no more
+frequent cause of failure than doubt and dread; a beginner can scarcely
+put his heart and strength into a work when he knows how long are the
+odds against his victory, how difficult it is for a new man to win a
+hearing, even though all editors and publishers are ever pining for a new
+man.  The young fellow, unknown and unwelcomed, who can sit down and give
+all his best of knowledge, observation, humour, care, and fancy to a
+considerable work has got courage in no common portion; he deserves to
+triumph, and certainly should not be disheartened by our old experience.
+But there be few beginners of this mark, most begin so feebly because
+they begin so fearfully.  They are already too discouraged, and can
+scarce do themselves justice.  It is easier to write more or less well
+and agreeably when you are certain of being published and paid, at least,
+than to write well when a dozen rejected manuscripts are cowering (as
+Theocritus says) in your chest, bowing their pale faces over their chilly
+knees, outcast, hungry, repulsed from many a door.  To write excellently,
+brightly, powerfully, with these poor unwelcomed wanderers, returned
+MSS., in your possession, is difficult indeed.  It might be wiser to do
+as M. Guy de Maupassant is rumoured to have done, to write for seven
+years, and shew your essays to none but a mentor as friendly severe as M.
+Flaubert.  But all men cannot have such mentors, nor can all afford so
+long an unremunerative apprenticeship.  For some the better plan is _not_
+to linger on the bank, and take tea and good advice, as Keats said, but
+to plunge at once in mid-stream, and learn swimming of necessity.
+
+One thing, perhaps, most people who succeed in letters so far as to keep
+themselves alive and clothed by their pens will admit, namely, that their
+early rejected MSS. _deserved to be rejected_.  A few days ago there came
+to the writer an old forgotten beginner's attempt by himself.  Whence it
+came, who sent it, he knows not; he had forgotten its very existence.  He
+read it with curiosity; it was written in a very much better hand than
+his present scrawl, and was perfectly legible.  But _readable_ it was
+not.  There was a great deal of work in it, on an out of the way topic,
+and the ideas were, perhaps, not quite without novelty at the time of its
+composition.  But it was cramped and thin, and hesitating between several
+manners; above all it was uncommonly dull.  If it ever was sent to an
+editor, as I presume it must have been, that editor was trebly justified
+in declining it.  On the other hand, to be egotistic, I have known
+editors reject the attempts of those old days, and afterwards express
+lively delight in them when they struggled into print, somehow,
+somewhere.  These worthy men did not even know that they had despised and
+refused what they came afterwards rather to enjoy.
+
+Editors and publishers, these keepers of the gates of success, are not
+infallible, but their opinion of a beginner's work is far more correct
+than his own can ever be.  They should not depress him quite, but if they
+are long unanimous in holding him cheap, he is warned, and had better
+withdraw from the struggle.  He is either incompetent, or he has the
+makings of a Browning.  He is a genius born too soon.  He may readily
+calculate the chances in favour of either alternative.
+
+So much by way of not damping all neophytes equally: so much we may say
+about success before talking of the easy ways that lead to failure.  And
+by success here is meant no glorious triumph; the laurels are not in our
+thoughts, nor the enormous opulence (about a fourth of a fortunate
+barrister's gains) which falls in the lap of a Dickens or a Trollope.
+Faint and fleeting praise, a crown with as many prickles as roses, a
+modest hardly-gained competence, a good deal of envy, a great deal of
+gossip--these are the rewards of genius which constitute a modern
+literary success.  Not to reach the moderate competence in literature is,
+for a professional man of letters of all work, something like failure.
+But in poetry to-day a man may succeed, as far as his art goes, and yet
+may be unread, and may publish at his own expense, or not publish at all.
+He pleases himself, and a very tiny audience: I do not call that failure.
+I regard failure as the goal of ignorance, incompetence, lack of common
+sense, conceited dulness, and certain practical blunders now to be
+explained and defined.
+
+The most ambitious may accept, without distrust, the following advice as
+to How to fail in Literature.  The advice is offered by a mere critic,
+and it is an axiom of the Arts that the critics "are the fellows who have
+failed," or have not succeeded.  The persons who really can paint, or
+play, or compose seldom tell us how it is done, still less do they review
+the performances of their contemporaries.  That invidious task they leave
+to the unsuccessful novelists.  The instruction, the advice are offered
+by the persons who cannot achieve performance.  It is thus that all
+things work together in favour of failure, which, indeed, may well appear
+so easy that special instruction, however competent, is a luxury rather
+than a necessary.  But when we look round on the vast multitude of
+writers who, to all seeming, deliberately aim at failure, who take every
+precaution in favour of failure that untutored inexperience can suggest,
+it becomes plain that education in ill-success, is really a popular want.
+In the following remarks some broad general principles, making disaster
+almost inevitable, will first be offered, and then special methods of
+failing in all special departments of letters will be ungrudgingly
+communicated.  It is not enough to attain failure, we should deserve it.
+The writer, by way of insuring complete confidence, would modestly
+mention that he has had ample opportunities of study in this branch of
+knowledge.  While sifting for five or six years the volunteered
+contributions to a popular periodical, he has received and considered
+some hundredweights of manuscript.  In all these myriad contributions he
+has not found thirty pieces which rose even to the ordinary dead level of
+magazine work.  He has thus enjoyed unrivalled chances of examining such
+modes of missing success as spontaneously occur to the human intellect,
+to the unaided ingenuity of men, women, and children. {1}
+
+He who would fail in literature cannot begin too early to neglect his
+education, and to adopt every opportunity of not observing life and
+character.  None of us is so young but that he may make himself perfect
+in writing an illegible hand.  This method, I am bound to say, is too
+frequently overlooked.  Most manuscripts by ardent literary volunteers
+are fairly legible.  On the other hand there are novelists, especially
+ladies, who not only write a hand wholly declining to let itself be
+deciphered, but who fill up the margins with interpolations, who write
+between the lines, and who cover the page with scratches running this way
+and that, intended to direct the attention to after-thoughts inserted
+here and there in corners and on the backs of sheets.  To pin in scraps
+of closely written paper and backs of envelopes adds to the security for
+failure, and produces a rich anger in the publisher's reader or the
+editor.
+
+The cultivation of a bad handwriting is an elementary precaution, often
+overlooked.  Few need to be warned against having their MSS. typewritten,
+this gives them a chance of being read with ease and interest, and this
+must be neglected by all who have really set their hearts on failure.  In
+the higher matters of education it is well to be as ignorant as possible.
+No knowledge comes amiss to the true man of letters, so they who court
+disaster should know as little as may be.
+
+Mr. Stevenson has told the attentive world how, in boyhood, he practised
+himself in studying and imitating the styles of famous authors of every
+age.  He who aims at failure must never think of style, and should
+sedulously abstain from reading Shakespeare, Bacon, Hooker, Walton,
+Gibbon, and other English and foreign classics.  He can hardly be too
+reckless of grammar, and should always place adverbs and other words
+between "to" and the infinitive, thus: "Hubert was determined to
+energetically and on all possible occasions, oppose any attempt to
+entangle him with such."  Here, it will be noticed, "such" is used as a
+pronoun, a delightful flower of speech not to be disregarded by authors
+who would fail.  But some one may reply that several of our most popular
+novelists revel in the kind of grammar which I am recommending.  This is
+undeniable, but certain people manage to succeed in spite of their own
+earnest endeavours and startling demerits.  There is no royal road to
+failure.  There is no rule without its exception, and it may be urged
+that the works of the gentlemen and ladies who "break Priscian's head"--as
+they would say themselves--may be successful, but are not literature.  Now
+it is about literature that we are speaking.
+
+In the matter of style, there is another excellent way.  You need not
+neglect it, but you may study it wrongly.  You may be affectedly self-
+conscious, you may imitate the ingenious persons who carefully avoid the
+natural word, the spontaneous phrase, and employ some other set of terms
+which can hardly be construed.  You may use, like a young essayist whom I
+have lovingly observed, a proportion of eighty adjectives to every sixty-
+five other words of all denominations.  You may hunt for odd words, and
+thrust them into the wrong places, as where you say that a man's nose is
+"beetling," that the sun sank in "a cauldron of daffodil chaos," and the
+like. {2}  You may use common words in an unwonted sense, keeping some
+private interpretation clearly before you.  Thus you may speak, if you
+like to write partly in the tongue of Hellas, about "assimilating the
+_ethos_" of a work of art, and so write that people shall think of the
+processes of digestion.  You may speak of "exhausting the beauty" of a
+landscape, and, somehow, convey the notion of sucking an orange dry.  Or
+you may wildly mix your metaphors, as when a critic accuses Mr. Browning
+of "giving the irridescence of the poetic afflatus," as if the poetic
+afflatus were blown through a pipe, into soap, and produced soap bubbles.
+This is a more troublesome method than the mere picking up of every
+newspaper commonplace that floats into your mind, but it is equally
+certain to lead--where you want to go.  By combining the two fashions a
+great deal may be done.  Thus you want to describe a fire at sea, and you
+say, "the devouring element lapped the quivering spars, the mast, and the
+sea-shouldering keel of the doomed _Mary Jane_ in one coruscating
+catastrophe.  The sea deeps were incarnadined to an alarming extent by
+the flames, and to escape from such many plunged headlong in their watery
+bier."
+
+As a rule, authors who would fail stick to one bad sort of writing;
+either to the newspaper commonplace, or to the out of the way and
+inappropriate epithets, or to the common word with a twist on it.  But
+there are examples of the combined method, as when we call the trees
+round a man's house his "domestic boscage."  This combination is
+difficult, but perfect for its purpose.  You cannot write worse than
+"such."  To attain perfection the young aspirant should confine his
+reading to the newspapers (carefully selecting his newspapers, for many
+of them will not help him to write ill) and to those modern authors who
+are most praised for their style by the people who know least about the
+matter.  Words like "fictional" and "fictive" are distinctly to be
+recommended, and there are epithets such as "weird," "strange," "wild,"
+"intimate," and the rest, which blend pleasantly with "all the time" for
+"always"; "back of" for "behind"; "belong with" for "belong to"; "live
+like I do" for "as I do."  The authors who combine those charms are rare,
+but we can strive to be among them.
+
+In short, he who would fail must avoid simplicity like a sunken reef, and
+must earnestly seek either the commonplace or the _bizarre_, the slipshod
+or the affected, the newfangled or the obsolete, the flippant or the
+sepulchral.  I need not specially recommend you to write in
+"Wardour-street English," the sham archaic, a lingo never spoken by
+mortal man, and composed of patches borrowed from authors between Piers
+Plowman and Gabriel Harvey.  A few literal translations of Icelandic
+phrases may be thrown in; the result, as furniture-dealers say, is a
+"made-up article."
+
+On the subject of style another hint may be offered.  Style may be good
+in itself, but inappropriate to the subject.  For example, style which
+may be excellently adapted to a theological essay, may be but ill-suited
+for a dialogue in a novel.  There are subjects of which the poet says
+
+   _Ornari res ipsa vetat, contenta doceri_.
+
+The matter declines to be adorned, and is content with being clearly
+stated.  I do not know what would occur if the writer of the Money
+Article in the _Times_ treated his topic with reckless gaiety.  Probably
+that number of the journal in which the essay appeared would have a large
+sale, but the author might achieve professional failure; in the office.
+On the whole it may not be the wiser plan to write about the Origins of
+Religion in the style which might suit a study of the life of ballet
+dancers; the two MM. Halevy, the learned and the popular, would make a
+blunder if they exchanged styles.  Yet Gibbon never denies himself a
+jest, and Montesquieu's _Esprit des Lois_ was called _L'Esprit sur les
+Lois_.  M. Renan's _Histoire d'Israel_ may almost be called skittish.  The
+French are more tolerant of those excesses than the English.  It is a
+digression, but he who would fail can reach his end by not taking himself
+seriously.  If he gives himself no important airs, whether out of a
+freakish humour, or real humility, depend upon it the public and the
+critics will take him at something under his own estimate.  On the other
+hand, by copying the gravity of demeanour admired by Mr. Shandy in a
+celebrated parochial animal, even a very dull person may succeed in
+winning no inconsiderable reputation.
+
+To return to style, and its appropriateness: all depends on the work in
+hand, and the audience addressed.  Thus, in his valuable Essay on Style,
+Mr. Pater says, with perfect truth: {3}
+
+"The otiose, the facile, surplusage: why are these abhorrent to the true
+literary artist, except because, in literary as in all other arts,
+structure is all important, felt or painfully missed, everywhere?--that
+architectural conception of work, which foresees the end in the
+beginning, and never loses sight of it, and in every part is conscious of
+all the rest, till the last sentence does but, with undiminished vigour,
+unfold and justify the first--a condition of literary art, which, in
+contradistinction to another quality of the artist himself, to be spoken
+of later, I shall call the necessity of _mind_ in style."
+
+These are words which the writer should have always present to his
+memory, if he has something serious that he wants to say, or if he wishes
+to express himself in the classic and perfect manner.  But if it is his
+fate merely to be obliged to say something, in the course of his
+profession, or if he is bid to discourse for the pleasure of readers in
+the Underground Railway, I fear he will often have to forget Mr. Pater.
+It may not be literature, the writing of _causeries_, of Roundabout
+Papers, of rambling articles "on a broomstick," and yet again, it _may_
+be literature!  "Parallel, allusion, the allusive way generally, the
+flowers in the garden"--Mr. Pater charges heavily against these.  The
+true artist "knows the narcotic force of these upon the negligent
+intelligence to which any _diversion_, literally, is welcome, any vagrant
+intruder, because one can go wandering away with it from the immediate
+subject . . . In truth all art does but consist in the removal of
+surplusage, from the last finish of the gem engraver blowing away the
+last particle of invisible dust, back to the earliest divination of the
+finished work to be lying somewhere, according to Michel Angelo's fancy,
+in the rough-hewn block of stone."
+
+Excellent, but does this apply to every kind of literary art?  What would
+become of Montaigne if you blew away his allusions, and drove him out of
+"the allusive way," where he gathers and binds so many flowers from all
+the gardens and all the rose-hung lanes of literature?  Montaigne sets
+forth to write an Essay on Coaches.  He begins with a few remarks on
+seasickness in the common pig; some notes on the Pont Neuf at Paris
+follow, and a theory of why tyrants are detested by men whom they have
+obliged; a glance at Coaches is then given, next a study of Montezuma's
+gardens, presently a brief account of the Spanish cruelties in Mexico and
+Peru, last--_retombons a nos coches_--he tells a tale of the Inca, and
+the devotion of his Guard: _Another for Hector_!
+
+The allusive style has its proper place, like another, if it is used by
+the right man, and the concentrated and structural style has also its
+higher province.  It would not do to employ either style in the wrong
+place.  In a rambling discursive essay, for example, a mere straying
+after the bird in the branches, or the thorn in the way, he might not
+take the safest road who imitated Mr. Pater's style in what follows:
+
+"In this way, according to the well-known saying, 'The style is the man,'
+complex or simple, in his individuality, his plenary sense of what he
+really has to say, his sense of the world: all cautions regarding style
+arising out of so many natural scruples as to the medium through which
+alone he can expose that inward sense of things, the purity of this
+medium, its laws or tricks of refraction: nothing is to be left there
+which might give conveyance to any matter save that."  Clearly the author
+who has to write so that the man may read who runs will fail if he wrests
+this manner from its proper place, and uses it for casual articles: he
+will fail to hold the vagrom attention!
+
+Thus a great deal may be done by studying inappropriateness of style, by
+adopting a style alien to our matter and to our audience.  If we "haver"
+discursively about serious, and difficult, and intricate topics, we fail;
+and we fail if we write on happy, pleasant, and popular topics in an
+abstruse and intent, and analytic style.  We fail, too, if in style we go
+outside our natural selves.  "The style is the man," and the man will be
+nothing, and nobody, if he tries for an incongruous manner, not naturally
+his own, for example if Miss Yonge were suddenly to emulate the manner of
+Lever, or if Mr. John Morley were to strive to shine in the fashion of
+_Uncle Remus_, or if Mr. Rider Haggard were to be allured into imitation
+by the example, so admirable in itself, of the Master of Balliol.  It is
+ourselves we must try to improve, our attentiveness, our interest in
+life, our seriousness of purpose, and then the style will improve with
+the self.  Or perhaps, to be perfectly frank, we shall thus convert
+ourselves into prigs, throw ourselves out of our stride, lapse into self-
+consciousness, lose all that is natural, _naif_, and instinctive within
+us.  Verily there are many dangers, and the paths to failure are
+infinite.
+
+So much for style, of which it may generally be said that you cannot be
+too obscure, unnatural, involved, vulgar, slipshod, and metaphorical.  See
+to it that your metaphors are mixed, though, perhaps, this attention is
+hardly needed.  The free use of parentheses, in which a reader gets lost,
+and of unintelligible allusions, and of references to unread authors--the
+_Kalevala_ and Lycophron, and the Scholiast on Apollonius Rhodius, is
+invaluable to this end.  So much for manner, and now for matter.
+
+The young author generally writes because he wants to write, either for
+money, from vanity, or in mere weariness of empty hours and anxiety to
+astonish his relations.  This is well, he who would fail cannot begin
+better than by having nothing to say.  The less you observe, the less you
+reflect, the less you put yourself in the paths of adventure and
+experience, the less you will have to say, and the more impossible will
+it be to read your work.  Never notice people's manner, conduct, nor even
+dress, in real life.  Walk through the world with your eyes and ears
+closed, and embody the negative results in a story or a poem.  As to
+Poetry, with a fine instinct we generally begin by writing verse, because
+verse is the last thing that the public want to read.  The young writer
+has usually read a great deal of verse, however, and most of it bad.  His
+favourite authors are the bright lyrists who sing of broken hearts,
+wasted lives, early deaths, disappointment, gloom.  Without having even
+had an unlucky flirtation, or without knowing what it is to lose a
+favourite cat, the early author pours forth laments, just like the
+laments he has been reading.  He has too a favourite manner, the old
+consumptive manner, about the hectic flush, the fatal rose on the pallid
+cheek, about the ruined roof tree, the empty chair, the rest in the
+village churchyard.  This is now a little _rococo_ and forlorn, but
+failure may be assured by travelling in this direction.  If you are
+ambitious to disgust an editor at once, begin your poem with "Only."  In
+fact you may as well head the lyric "Only." {4}
+
+   ONLY.
+
+   Only a spark of an ember,
+      Only a leaf on the tree,
+   Only the days we remember,
+      Only the days without thee.
+   Only the flower that thou worest,
+      Only the book that we read,
+   Only that night in the forest,
+      Only a dream of the dead,
+   Only the troth that was broken,
+      Only the heart that is lonely,
+   Only the sigh and the token
+      That sob in the saying of Only!
+
+In literature this is a certain way of failing, but I believe a person
+might make a livelihood by writing verses like these--for music.  Another
+good way is to be very economical in your rhymes, only two to the four
+lines, and regretfully vague.  Thus:
+
+   SHADOWS.
+
+   In the slumber of the winter,
+      In the secret of the snow,
+   What is the voice that is crying
+      Out of the long ago?
+
+   When the accents of the children
+      Are silent on the stairs,
+   When the poor forgets his troubles,
+      And the rich forgets his cares.
+
+   What is the silent whisper
+      That echoes in the room,
+   When the days are full of darkness,
+      And the night is hushed in gloom?
+
+   'Tis the voice of the departed,
+      Who will never come again,
+   Who has left the weary tumult,
+      And the struggle and the pain. {5}
+
+   And my heart makes heavy answer,
+      To the voice that comes no more,
+   To the whisper that is welling
+      From the far off happy shore.
+
+If you are not satisfied with these simple ways of not succeeding, please
+try the Grosvenor Gallery style.  Here the great point is to make the
+rhyme arrive at the end of a very long word, you should also be free with
+your alliterations.
+
+   LULLABY.
+
+   When the sombre night is dumb,
+   Hushed the loud chrysanthemum,
+      Sister, sleep!
+   Sleep, the lissom lily saith,
+   Sleep, the poplar whispereth,
+      Soft and deep!
+
+   Filmy floats the wild woodbine,
+   Jonquil, jacinth, jessamine,
+      Float and flow.
+   Sleeps the water wild and wan,
+   As in far off Toltecan
+      Mexico.
+
+   See, upon the sun-dial,
+   Waves the midnight's misty pall,
+      Waves and wakes.
+   As, in tropic Timbuctoo,
+   Water beasts go plashing through
+      Lilied lakes!
+
+Alliteration is a splendid source of failure in this sort of poetry, and
+adjectives like lissom, filmy, weary, weird, strange, make, or ought to
+make, the rejection of your manuscript a certainty.  The poem should, as
+a rule, seem to be addressed to an unknown person, and should express
+regret and despair for circumstances in the past with which the reader is
+totally unacquainted.  Thus:
+
+   GHOSTS.
+
+   We met at length, as Souls that sit
+   At funeral feast, and taste of it,
+   And empty were the words we said,
+   As fits the converse of the dead,
+   For it is long ago, my dear,
+   Since we two met in living cheer,
+   Yea, we have long been ghosts, you know,
+   And alien ways we twain must go,
+   Nor shall we meet in Shadow Land,
+   Till Time's glass, empty of its sand,
+   Is filled up of Eternity.
+   Farewell--enough for once to die--
+   And far too much it is to dream,
+   And taste not the Lethaean stream,
+   But bear the pain of loves unwed
+   Even here, even here, among the dead!
+
+That is a cheerful intelligible kind of melody, which is often practised
+with satisfactory results.  Every form of imitation (imitating of course
+only the faults of a favourite writer) is to be recommended.
+
+Imitation does a double service, it secures the failure of the imitator
+and also aids that of the unlucky author who is imitated.  As soon as a
+new thing appears in literature, many people hurry off to attempt
+something of the same sort.  It may be a particular trait and accent in
+poetry, and the public, weary of the mimicries, begin to dislike the
+original.
+
+   "Most can grow the flowers now,
+      For all have got the seed;
+   And once again the people
+      Call it but a weed."
+
+In fiction, if somebody brings in a curious kind of murder, or a study of
+religious problems, or a treasure hunt, or what you will, others imitate
+till the world is weary of murders, or theological flirtations, or the
+search for buried specie, and the original authors themselves will fail,
+unless they fish out something new, to be vulgarised afresh.  Therefore,
+imitation is distinctly to be urged on the young author.
+
+As a rule, his method is this, he reads very little, but all that he
+reads is _bad_.  The feeblest articles in the weakliest magazines, the
+very mildest and most conventional novels appear to be the only studies
+of the majority.  Apparently the would-be contributor says to himself, or
+herself, "well, _I_ can do something almost on the level of this or that
+maudlin and invertebrate novel."  Then he deliberately sits down to rival
+the most tame, dull, and illiterate compositions that get into print.  In
+this way bad authors become the literary parents of worse authors.  Nobody
+but a reader of MSS. knows what myriads of fiction are written without
+one single new situation, original character, or fresh thought.  The most
+out-worn ideas: sudden loss of fortune; struggles; faithlessness of First
+Lover; noble conduct of Second Lover: frivolity of younger sister;
+excellence of mother: naughtiness of one son, virtue of another, these
+are habitually served up again and again.  On the sprained ankles, the
+mad bulls, the fires, and other simple devices for doing without an
+introduction between hero and heroine I need not dwell.  The very
+youngest of us is acquainted with these expedients, which, by this time
+of day, will spell failure.
+
+The common novels of Governess life, the daughters and granddaughters of
+_Jane Eyre_, still run riot among the rejected manuscripts.  The lively
+large family, all very untidy and humorous, all wearing each other's
+boots and gloves, and making their dresses out of bedroom curtains and
+marrying rich men, still rushes down the easy descent to failure.  The
+sceptical curate is at large, and is disbelieving in everything except
+the virtues of the young woman who "has a history."  Mr. Swinburne hopes
+that one day the last unbelieving clergyman will disappear in the embrace
+of the last immaculate Magdalen, as the Princess and the Geni burn each
+other to nothingness, in the _Arabian Nights_.  On that happy day there
+will be one less of the roads leading to failure.  If the pair can carry
+with them the self-sacrificing characters who take the blame of all the
+felonies that they did not do, and the nice girl who is jilted by the
+poet, and finds that the squire was the person whom she _really_ loved,
+so much the better.  If not only Monte Carlo, but the inevitable scene in
+the Rooms there can be abolished; if the Riviera, and Italy can be
+removed from the map of Europe as used by novelists, so much the better.
+But failure will always be secured, while the huge majority of authors do
+not aim high, but aim at being a little lower than the last domestic
+drivel which came out in three volumes, or the last analysis of the
+inmost self of some introspective young girl which crossed the water from
+the States.
+
+These are general counsels, and apply to the production of books.  But,
+when you have done your book, you may play a number of silly tricks with
+your manuscript.  I have already advised you to make only one copy, a
+rough one, as that secures negligence in your work, and also disgusts an
+editor or reader.  It has another advantage, you may lose your copy
+altogether, and, as you have not another, no failure can be more
+complete.  The best way of losing it, I think and the safest, is to give
+it to somebody you know who has once met some man or woman of letters..
+This somebody must be instructed to ask that busy and perhaps casual and
+untidy person to read your manuscript, and "place" it, that is, induce
+some poor publisher or editor to pay for and publish it.  Now the man, or
+woman of letters, will use violent language on receiving your clumsy
+brown paper parcel of illegible wares, because he or she has no more to
+do with the matter than the crossing sweeper.  The MS. will either be put
+away so carefully that it can never be found again, or will be left lying
+about so that the housemaid may use it for her own domestic purposes,
+like Betty Barnes, the cook of Mr. Warburton, who seems to have burned
+several plays of Shakespeare.
+
+The MS. in short will go where the old moons go.
+
+   And all dead days drift thither,
+      And all disastrous things.
+
+Not only can you secure failure thus yourself, but you can so worry and
+badger your luckless victim, that he too will be unable to write well
+till he has forgotten you and your novel, and all the annoyance and
+anxiety you have given him.  Much may be done by asking him for
+"introductions" to an editor or publisher.  These gentry don't want
+introductions, they want good books, and very seldom get them.  If you
+behave thus, the man whom you are boring will write to his publisher:
+
+   Dear Brown,
+
+   A wretched creature, who knows my great aunt, asks me to recommend his
+   rubbish to you.  I send it by to-day's post, and I wish you joy of it.
+
+This kind of introduction will do you excellent service in smoothing the
+path to failure.  You can arrive at similar results by sending your MS.
+_not_ to the editor of this or that magazine, but to some one who, as you
+have been told by some nincompoop, is the editor, and who is _not_.  He
+_may_ lose your book, or he may let it lie about for months, or he may
+send it on at once to the real editor with his bitter malison.  The
+utmost possible vexation is thus inflicted on every hand, and a prejudice
+is established against you which the nature of your work is very unlikely
+to overcome.  By all means bore many literary strangers with
+correspondence, this will give them a lively recollection of your name,
+and an intense desire to do you a bad turn if opportunity arises. {6}
+
+If your book does, in spite of all, get itself published, send it with
+your compliments to critics and ask them for favourable reviews.  It is
+the publisher's business to send out books to the editors of critical
+papers, but never mind _that_.  Go on telling critics that you know
+praise is only given by favour, that they are all more or less venal and
+corrupt and members of the Something Club, add that _you_ are no member
+of a _coterie_ nor clique, but that you hope an exception will be made,
+and that your volume will be applauded on its merits.  You will thus have
+done what in you lies to secure silence from reviewers, and to make them
+request that your story may be sent to some other critic.  This, again,
+gives trouble, and makes people detest you and your performance, and
+contributes to the end which you have steadily in view.
+
+I do not think it is necessary to warn young lady novelists, who possess
+beauty, wealth, and titles, against asking Reviewers to dine, and
+treating them as kindly, almost, as the Fairy Paribanou treated Prince
+Ahmed.  They only act thus, I fear, in Mr. William Black's novels.
+
+Much may be done by re-writing your book on the proof sheets, correcting
+everything there which you should have corrected in manuscript.  This is
+an expensive process, and will greatly diminish your pecuniary gains, or
+rather will add to your publisher's bill, for the odds are that you will
+have to publish at your own expense.  By the way, an author can make
+almost a certainty of disastrous failure, by carrying to some small
+obscure publisher a work which has been rejected by the best people in
+the trade.  Their rejections all but demonstrate that your book is
+worthless.  If you think you are likely to make a good thing by employing
+an obscure publisher, with little or no capital, then, as some one in
+Thucydides remarks, congratulating you on your simplicity, I do not envy
+your want of common sense.  Be very careful to enter into a perfectly
+preposterous agreement.  For example, accept "half profits," but forget
+to observe that before these are reckoned, it is distinctly stated in
+your "agreement" that the publisher is to pay _himself_ some twenty per
+cent. on the price of each copy sold before you get your share.
+
+Here is "another way," as the cookery books have it.  In your gratitude
+to your first publisher, covenant with him to let him have all the cheap
+editions of all your novels for the next five years, at his own terms.
+If, in spite of the advice I have given you, you somehow manage to
+succeed, to become wildly popular, you will still have reserved to
+yourself, by this ingenious clause, a chance of ineffable pecuniary
+failure.  A plan generally approved of is to sell your entire copyright
+in your book for a very small sum.  You want the ready money, and perhaps
+you are not very hopeful.  But, when your book is in all men's hands,
+when you are daily reviled by the small fry of paragraphers, when the
+publisher is clearing a thousand a year by it, while you only got a
+hundred down, then you will thank me, and will acknowledge that, in spite
+of apparent success, you are a failure after all.  There are publishers,
+however, so inconsiderate that they will not leave you even this
+consolation.  Finding that the book they bought cheap is really valuable,
+they will insist on sharing the profits with the author, or on making him
+great presents of money to which he has no legal claim.  Some persons,
+some authors, cannot fail if they would, so wayward is fortune, and such
+a Quixotic idea of honesty have some middlemen of literature.  But, of
+course, you _may_ light on a publisher who will not give you _more_ than
+you covenanted for, and then you can go about denouncing the whole
+profession as a congregation of robbers and clerks of St. Nicholas.
+
+The ways of failure are infinite, and of course are not nearly exhausted.
+One good plan is never to be yourself when you write, to put in nothing
+of your own temperament, manner, character--or to have none, which does
+as well.  Another favourite method is to offer the wrong kind of article,
+to send to the _Cornhill_ an essay on the evolution of the Hittite
+syllabary, (for only one author could make _that_ popular;) or a sketch
+of cock fighting among the ancients to the _Monthly Record_; or an essay
+on _Ayahs in India_ to an American magazine; or a biography of Washington
+or Lincoln to any English magazine whatever.  We have them every month in
+some American periodicals, and our poor insular serials can get on
+without them: "have no use for them."
+
+It is a minor, though valuable scheme, to send poems on Christmas to
+magazines about the beginning of December, because, in fact, the editors
+have laid in their stock of that kind of thing earlier.  Always insist on
+_seeing_ an editor, instead of writing to him.  There is nothing he hates
+so much, unless you are very young and beautiful indeed, when, perhaps,
+if you wish to fail you had better _not_ pay him a visit at the office.
+Even if you do, even if you were as fair as the Golden Helen, he is not
+likely to put in your compositions if, as is probable, they fall _much_
+below the level of his magazine.
+
+A good way of making yourself a dead failure is to go about accusing
+successful people of plagiarising from books or articles of yours which
+did not succeed, and, perhaps, were never published at all.  By
+encouraging this kind of vanity and spite you may entirely destroy any
+small powers you once happened to possess, you will, besides, become a
+person with a grievance, and, in the long run, will be shunned even by
+your fellow failures.  Again, you may plagiarise yourself, if you can, it
+is not easy, but it is a safe way to fail if you can manage it.  No
+successful person, perhaps, was ever, in the strict sense, a plagiarist,
+though charges of plagiary are always brought against everybody, from
+Virgil to Milton, from Scott to Moliere, who attains success.  When you
+are accused of being a plagiarist, and shewn up in double columns, you
+may be pretty sure that all this counsel has been wasted on you, and that
+you have failed to fail, after all.  Otherwise nobody would envy and
+malign you, and garble your book, and print quotations from it which you
+did not write, all in the sacred cause of morality.
+
+Advice on how to secure the reverse of success should not be given to
+young authors alone.  Their kinsfolk and friends, also, can do much for
+their aid.  A lady who feels a taste for writing is very seldom allowed
+to have a quiet room, a quiet study.  If she retreats to her chill and
+fireless bed chamber, even there she may be chevied by her brothers,
+sisters, and mother.  It is noticed that cousins, and aunts, especially
+aunts, are of high service in this regard.  They never give an
+intelligent woman an hour to herself.
+
+"Is Miss Mary in?"
+
+"Yes, ma'am, but she is very busy."
+
+"Oh, she won't mind me, I don't mean to stay long."
+
+Then in rushes the aunt.
+
+"Over your books again: my dear!  You really should not overwork
+yourself.  Writing something"; here the aunt clutches the manuscript, and
+looks at it vaguely.
+
+"Well, I dare say it's very clever, but I don't care for this kind of
+thing myself.  Where's your mother?  Is Jane better?  Now, do tell me, do
+you get much for writing all that?  Do you send it to the printers, or
+where?  How interesting, and that reminds me, you that are a novelist,
+have you heard how shamefully Miss Baxter was treated by Captain Smith?
+No, well you might make something out of it."
+
+Here follows the anecdote, at prodigious length, and perfectly
+incoherent.
+
+"Now, write _that_, and I shall always say I was partly the author.  You
+really should give me a commission, you know.  Well, good bye, tell your
+mother I called.  Why, there she is, I declare.  Oh, Susan, just come and
+hear the delightful plot for a novel that I have been giving Mary."
+
+And then she begins again, only further back, this time.
+
+It is thus that the aunts of England may and do assist their nieces to
+fail in literature.  Many and many a morning do they waste, many a
+promising fancy have they blighted, many a temper have they spoiled.
+
+Sisters are rather more sympathetic: the favourite plan of the brother is
+to say, "Now, Mary, read us your new chapter."
+
+Mary reads it, and the critic exclaims, "Well, of all the awful Rot!  Now,
+why can't you do something like _Bootles's Baby_?"
+
+Fathers never take any interest in the business at all: they do not
+count.  The sympathy of a mother may be reckoned on, but not her
+judgement, for she is either wildly favourable, or, mistrusting her own
+tendencies, is more diffident than need be.  The most that relations can
+do for the end before us is to worry, interrupt, deride, and tease the
+literary member of the family.  They seldom fail in these duties, and not
+even success, as a rule, can persuade them that there is anything in it
+but "luck."
+
+Perhaps reviewing is not exactly a form of literature.  But it has this
+merit that people who review badly, not only fail themselves, but help
+others to fail, by giving a bad idea of their works.  You will, of
+course, never read the books you review, and you will be exhaustively
+ignorant of the subjects which they treat.  But you can always find fault
+with the _title_ of the story which comes into your hands, a stupid
+reviewer never fails to do this.  You can also copy out as much of the
+preface as will fill your eighth of a column, and add, that the
+performance is not equal to the promise.  You must never feel nor shew
+the faintest interest in the work reviewed, that would be fatal.  Never
+praise heartily, that is the sign of an intelligence not mediocre.  Be
+vague, colourless, and languid, this deters readers from approaching the
+book.  If you have glanced at it, blame it for not being what it never
+professed to be; if it is a treatise on Greek Prosody, censure the lack
+of humour; if it is a volume of gay verses, lament the author's
+indifference to the sorrows of the poor or the wrongs of the Armenians.
+If it has humour, deplore its lack of thoughtfulness; if it is grave,
+carp at its lack of gaiety.  I have known a reviewer of half a dozen
+novels denounce half a dozen _kinds_ of novels in the course of his two
+columns; the romance of adventure, the domestic tale, the psychological
+analysis, the theological story, the detective's story, the story of
+"Society," he blamed them all in general, and the books before him in
+particular, also the historical novel.  This can easily be done, by dint
+of practice, after dipping into three or four pages of your author.  Many
+reviewers have special aversions, authors they detest.  Whatever they are
+criticising, novels, poems, plays, they begin by an attack on their pet
+aversion, who has nothing to do with the matter in hand.  They cannot
+praise A, B, C, and D, without first assailing E.  It will generally be
+found that E is a popular author.  But the great virtue of a reviewer,
+who would be unreadable and make others unread, is a languid ignorant
+lack of interest in all things, a habit of regarding his work as a
+tedious task, to be scamped as rapidly and stupidly as possible.
+
+You might think that these qualities would displease the reviewer's
+editor.  Not at all, look at any column of short notices, and you will
+occasionally find that the critic has anticipated my advice.  There is no
+topic in which the men who write about it are so little interested as
+contemporary literature.  Perhaps this is no matter to marvel at.  By the
+way, a capital plan is not to write your review till the book has been
+out for two years.  This is the favourite dodge of the ---, that
+distinguished journal.
+
+If any one has kindly attended to this discourse, without desiring to be
+a failure, he has only to turn the advice outside in.  He has only to be
+studious of the very best literature, observant, careful, original, he
+has only to be himself and not an imitator, to aim at excellence, and not
+be content with falling a little lower than mediocrity.  He needs but
+bestow the same attention on this art as others give to the other arts
+and other professions.  With these efforts, and with a native and natural
+gift, which can never be taught, never communicated, and with his mind
+set not on his reward, but on excellence, on style, on matter, and even
+on the not wholly unimportant virtue of vivacity, a man will succeed, or
+will deserve success.  First, of course, he will have to "find" himself,
+as the French say, and if he does _not_ find an ass, then, like Saul the
+son of Kish, he may discover a kingdom.  One success he can hardly miss,
+the happiness of living, not with trash, but among good books, and "the
+mighty minds of old."  In an unpublished letter of Mr. Thackeray's,
+written before he was famous, and a novelist, he says how much he likes
+writing on historical subjects, and how he enjoys historical research.
+_The work is so gentlemanly_, he remarks.  Often and often, after the
+daily dreadful lines, the bread and butter winning lines on some
+contemporary folly or frivolity, does a man take up some piece of work
+hopelessly unremunerative, foredoomed to failure as far as money or fame
+go, some dealing with the classics of the world, Homer or Aristotle,
+Lucian or Moliere.  It is like a bath after a day's toil, it is tonic and
+clean; and such studies, if not necessary to success, are, at least,
+conducive to mental health and self-respect in literature.
+
+To the enormous majority of persons who risk themselves in literature,
+not even the smallest measure of success can fall.  They had better take
+to some other profession as quickly as may be, they are only making a
+sure thing of disappointment, only crowding the narrow gates of fortune
+and fame.  Yet there are others to whom success, though easily within
+their reach, does not seem a thing to be grasped at.  Of two such, the
+pathetic story may be read, in the Memoir of _A Scotch Probationer_, Mr.
+Thomas Davidson, who died young, an unplaced Minister of the United
+Presbyterian Church, in 1869.  He died young, unaccepted by the world,
+unheard of, uncomplaining, soon after writing his latest song on the
+first grey hairs of the lady whom he loved.  And she, Miss Alison Dunlop,
+died also, a year ago, leaving a little work newly published, _Anent Old
+Edinburgh_, in which is briefly told the story of her life.  There can
+hardly be a true tale more brave and honourable, for those two were
+eminently qualified to shine, with a clear and modest radiance, in
+letters.  Both had a touch of poetry, Mr. Davidson left a few genuine
+poems, both had humour, knowledge, patience, industry, and literary
+conscientiousness.  No success came to them, they did not even seek it,
+though it was easily within the reach of their powers.  Yet none can call
+them failures, leaving, as they did, the fragrance of honourable and
+uncomplaining lives, and such brief records of these as to delight, and
+console and encourage us all.  They bequeath to us the spectacle of a
+real triumph far beyond the petty gains of money or of applause, the
+spectacle of lives made happy by literature, unvexed by notoriety,
+unfretted by envy.  What we call success could never have yielded them so
+much, for the ways of authorship are dusty and stony, and the stones are
+only too handy for throwing at the few that, deservedly or undeservedly,
+make a name, and therewith about one-tenth of the wealth which is
+ungrudged to physicians, or barristers, or stock-brokers, or dentists, or
+electricians.  If literature and occupation with letters were not its own
+reward, truly they who seem to succeed might envy those who fail.  It is
+not wealth that they win, as fortunate men in other professions count
+wealth; it is not rank nor fashion that come to their call nor come to
+call on them.  Their success is to be let dwell with their own fancies,
+or with the imaginations of others far greater than themselves; their
+success is this living in fantasy, a little remote from the hubbub and
+the contests of the world.  At the best they will be vexed by curious
+eyes and idle tongues, at the best they will die not rich in this world's
+goods, yet not unconsoled by the friendships which they win among men and
+women whose faces they will never see.  They may well be content, and
+thrice content, with their lot, yet it is not a lot which should provoke
+envy, nor be coveted by ambition.
+
+It is not an easy goal to attain, as the crowd of aspirants dream, nor is
+the reward luxurious when it is attained.  A garland, usually fading and
+not immortal, has to be run for, not without dust and heat.
+
+
+
+
+FOOTNOTES
+
+
+{1}  As the writer has ceased to sift, editorially, the contributions of
+the age, he does hope that authors will not instantly send him their MSS.
+But if they do, after this warning, they will take the most direct and
+certain road to the waste paper basket.  No MSS. will be returned, even
+when accompanied by postage stamps.
+
+{2}  I have made a rich selection of examples from the works of living
+English and American authors.  From the inextensive volumes of an eminent
+and fastidious critic I have culled a dear phrase about an oasis of style
+in "a desert of literary limpness."  But it were hardly courteous, and
+might be dangerous, to publish these exotic blossoms of art.
+
+{3}  _Appreciations_, p. 18.
+
+{4}  It was the custom of Longinus, of the author of _The Bathos_, and
+other old critics, to take their examples of how _not_ to do it from the
+works of famous writers, such as Sir Richard Blackmore and Herodotus.  It
+seems altogether safer and more courteous for an author to supply his own
+Awful Examples.  The Musical Rights in the following Poems are reserved.
+
+{5}  Or, if you prefer the other rhyme, read: _And the wilderness of
+men_.
+
+{6}  It is a teachable public: since this lecture was delivered the
+author has received many MSS. from people who said they had heard the
+discourse, "and enjoyed it so much."
+
+
+
+***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK HOW TO FAIL IN LITERATURE***
+
+
+******* This file should be named 2566.txt or 2566.zip *******
+
+
+This and all associated files of various formats will be found in:
+https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/5/6/2566
+
+
+
+Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions
+will be renamed.
+
+Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no
+one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation
+(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without
+permission and without paying copyright royalties.  Special rules,
+set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to
+copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to
+protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark.  Project
+Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you
+charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission.  If you
+do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the
+rules is very easy.  You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose
+such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and
+research.  They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do
+practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks.  Redistribution is
+subject to the trademark license, especially commercial
+redistribution.
+
+
+
+*** START: FULL LICENSE ***
+
+THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE
+PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK
+
+To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free
+distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work
+(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project
+Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project
+Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at
+https://gutenberg.org/license).
+
+
+Section 1.  General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic works
+
+1.A.  By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to
+and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property
+(trademark/copyright) agreement.  If you do not agree to abide by all
+the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy
+all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession.
+If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the
+terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or
+entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8.
+
+1.B.  "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark.  It may only be
+used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who
+agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement.  There are a few
+things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works
+even without complying with the full terms of this agreement.  See
+paragraph 1.C below.  There are a lot of things you can do with Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement
+and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works.  See paragraph 1.E below.
+
+1.C.  The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation"
+or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic works.  Nearly all the individual works in the
+collection are in the public domain in the United States.  If an
+individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are
+located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from
+copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative
+works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg
+are removed.  Of course, we hope that you will support the Project
+Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by
+freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of
+this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with
+the work.  You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by
+keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project
+Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others.
+
+1.D.  The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern
+what you can do with this work.  Copyright laws in most countries are in
+a constant state of change.  If you are outside the United States, check
+the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement
+before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or
+creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project
+Gutenberg-tm work.  The Foundation makes no representations concerning
+the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United
+States.
+
+1.E.  Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg:
+
+1.E.1.  The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate
+access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently
+whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the
+phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project
+Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed,
+copied or distributed:
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+1.E.2.  If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived
+from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is
+posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied
+and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees
+or charges.  If you are redistributing or providing access to a work
+with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the
+work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1
+through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the
+Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or
+1.E.9.
+
+1.E.3.  If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted
+with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution
+must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional
+terms imposed by the copyright holder.  Additional terms will be linked
+to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the
+permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work.
+
+1.E.4.  Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this
+work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm.
+
+1.E.5.  Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this
+electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without
+prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with
+active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project
+Gutenberg-tm License.
+
+1.E.6.  You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary,
+compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any
+word processing or hypertext form.  However, if you provide access to or
+distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than
+"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version
+posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org),
+you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a
+copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon
+request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other
+form.  Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1.
+
+1.E.7.  Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying,
+performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works
+unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.
+
+1.E.8.  You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing
+access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided
+that
+
+- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from
+     the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method
+     you already use to calculate your applicable taxes.  The fee is
+     owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he
+     has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the
+     Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation.  Royalty payments
+     must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you
+     prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax
+     returns.  Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and
+     sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the
+     address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to
+     the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation."
+
+- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies
+     you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he
+     does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+     License.  You must require such a user to return or
+     destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium
+     and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of
+     Project Gutenberg-tm works.
+
+- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any
+     money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the
+     electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days
+     of receipt of the work.
+
+- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free
+     distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works.
+
+1.E.9.  If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set
+forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from
+both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael
+Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark.  Contact the
+Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below.
+
+1.F.
+
+1.F.1.  Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable
+effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread
+public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm
+collection.  Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain
+"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or
+corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual
+property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a
+computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by
+your equipment.
+
+1.F.2.  LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right
+of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project
+Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project
+Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all
+liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal
+fees.  YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT
+LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE
+PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH F3.  YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE
+TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE
+LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR
+INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH
+DAMAGE.
+
+1.F.3.  LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a
+defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can
+receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a
+written explanation to the person you received the work from.  If you
+received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with
+your written explanation.  The person or entity that provided you with
+the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a
+refund.  If you received the work electronically, the person or entity
+providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to
+receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund.  If the second copy
+is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further
+opportunities to fix the problem.
+
+1.F.4.  Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth
+in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS', WITH NO OTHER
+WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO
+WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE.
+
+1.F.5.  Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied
+warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages.
+If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the
+law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be
+interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by
+the applicable state law.  The invalidity or unenforceability of any
+provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions.
+
+1.F.6.  INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the
+trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone
+providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance
+with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production,
+promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works,
+harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees,
+that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do
+or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm
+work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any
+Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause.
+
+
+Section  2.  Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of
+electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers
+including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers.  It exists
+because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from
+people in all walks of life.
+
+Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the
+assistance they need, is critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's
+goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will
+remain freely available for generations to come.  In 2001, the Project
+Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure
+and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations.
+To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation
+and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4
+and the Foundation web page at https://www.gutenberg.org/fundraising/pglaf.
+
+
+Section 3.  Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive
+Foundation
+
+The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit
+501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the
+state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal
+Revenue Service.  The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification
+number is 64-6221541.  Contributions to the Project Gutenberg
+Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent
+permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws.
+
+The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S.
+Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered
+throughout numerous locations.  Its business office is located at
+809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email
+business@pglaf.org.  Email contact links and up to date contact
+information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official
+page at https://www.gutenberg.org/about/contact
+
+For additional contact information:
+     Dr. Gregory B. Newby
+     Chief Executive and Director
+     gbnewby@pglaf.org
+
+Section 4.  Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg
+Literary Archive Foundation
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide
+spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of
+increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be
+freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest
+array of equipment including outdated equipment.  Many small donations
+($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt
+status with the IRS.
+
+The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating
+charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United
+States.  Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a
+considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up
+with these requirements.  We do not solicit donations in locations
+where we have not received written confirmation of compliance.  To
+SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any
+particular state visit https://www.gutenberg.org/fundraising/donate
+
+While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we
+have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition
+against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who
+approach us with offers to donate.
+
+International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make
+any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from
+outside the United States.  U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff.
+
+Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation
+methods and addresses.  Donations are accepted in a number of other
+ways including including checks, online payments and credit card
+donations.  To donate, please visit:
+https://www.gutenberg.org/fundraising/donate
+
+
+Section 5.  General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works.
+
+Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm
+concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared
+with anyone.  For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project
+Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support.
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed
+editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S.
+unless a copyright notice is included.  Thus, we do not necessarily
+keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition.
+
+Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility:
+
+     https://www.gutenberg.org
+
+This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm,
+including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary
+Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to
+subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks.
+