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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/2436-0.txt b/2436-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..e0f13eb --- /dev/null +++ b/2436-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1728 @@ +The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Marriages, by Henry James + + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most +other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions +whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of +the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at +www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have +to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. + + + + +Title: The Marriages + + +Author: Henry James + + + +Release Date: February 1, 2015 [eBook #2436] +[This file was first posted on February 23, 2000] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MARRIAGES*** + + +Transcribed from the 1922 Macmillan and Co. “Daisy Miller, Pandora, The +Patagonia and Other Tales” edition by David Price, email +ccx074@pglaf.org. Proofing by Elizabeth Manzelli and Vanessa Mosher. + + [Picture: Book cover] + + + + + + THE MARRIAGES + by Henry James + + +I + + +“WON’T you stay a little longer?” the hostess asked while she held the +girl’s hand and smiled. “It’s too early for every one to go—it’s too +absurd.” Mrs. Churchley inclined her head to one side and looked +gracious; she flourished about her face, in a vaguely protecting +sheltering way, an enormous fan of red feathers. Everything in her +composition, for Adela Chart, was enormous. She had big eyes, big teeth, +big shoulders, big hands, big rings and bracelets, big jewels of every +sort and many of them. The train of her crimson dress was longer than +any other; her house was huge; her drawing-room, especially now that the +company had left it, looked vast, and it offered to the girl’s eyes a +collection of the largest sofas and chairs, pictures, mirrors, clocks, +that she had ever beheld. Was Mrs. Churchley’s fortune also large, to +account for so many immensities? Of this Adela could know nothing, but +it struck her, while she smiled sweetly back at their entertainer, that +she had better try to find out. Mrs. Churchley had at least a high-hung +carriage drawn by the tallest horses, and in the Row she was to be seen +perched on a mighty hunter. She was high and extensive herself, though +not exactly fat; her bones were big, her limbs were long, and her loud +hurrying voice resembled the bell of a steamboat. While she spoke to his +daughter she had the air of hiding from Colonel Chart, a little shyly, +behind the wide ostrich fan. But Colonel Chart was not a man to be +either ignored or eluded. + +“Of course every one’s going on to something else,” he said. “I believe +there are a lot of things to-night.” + +“And where are _you_ going?” Mrs. Churchley asked, dropping her fan and +turning her bright hard eyes on the Colonel. + +“Oh I don’t do that sort of thing!”—he used a tone of familiar resentment +that fell with a certain effect on his daughter’s ear. She saw in it +that he thought Mrs. Churchley might have done him a little more justice. +But what made the honest soul suppose her a person to look to for a +perception of fine shades? Indeed the shade was one it might have been a +little difficult to seize—the difference between “going on” and coming to +a dinner of twenty people. The pair were in mourning; the second year +had maintained it for Adela, but the Colonel hadn’t objected to dining +with Mrs. Churchley, any more than he had objected at Easter to going +down to the Millwards’, where he had met her and where the girl had her +reasons for believing him to have known he should meet her. Adela wasn’t +clear about the occasion of their original meeting, to which a certain +mystery attached. In Mrs. Churchley’s exclamation now there was the +fullest concurrence in Colonel Chart’s idea; she didn’t say “Ah yes, dear +friend, I understand!” but this was the note of sympathy she plainly +wished to sound. It immediately made Adela say to her “Surely you must +be going on somewhere yourself.” + +“Yes, you must have a lot of places,” the Colonel concurred, while his +view of her shining raiment had an invidious directness. Adela could +read the tacit implication: “You’re not in sorrow, in desolation.” + +Mrs. Churchley turned away from her at this and just waited before +answering. The red fan was up again, and this time it sheltered her from +Adela. “I’ll give everything up—for _you_,” were the words that issued +from behind it. “_Do_ stay a little. I always think this is such a nice +hour. One can really talk,” Mrs. Churchley went on. The Colonel +laughed; he said it wasn’t fair. But their hostess pressed his daughter. +“Do sit down; it’s the only time to have any talk.” The girl saw her +father sit down, but she wandered away, turning her back and pretending +to look at a picture. She was so far from agreeing with Mrs. Churchley +that it was an hour she particularly disliked. She was conscious of the +queerness, the shyness, in London, of the gregarious flight of guests +after a dinner, the general _sauve qui peut_ and panic fear of being left +with the host and hostess. But personally she always felt the contagion, +always conformed to the rush. Besides, she knew herself turn red now, +flushed with a conviction that had come over her and that she wished not +to show. + +Her father sat down on one of the big sofas with Mrs. Churchley; +fortunately he was also a person with a presence that could hold its own. +Adela didn’t care to sit and watch them while they made love, as she +crudely imaged it, and she cared still less to join in their strange +commerce. She wandered further away, went into another of the bright +“handsome,” rather nude rooms—they were like women dressed for a +ball—where the displaced chairs, at awkward angles to each other, seemed +to retain the attitudes of bored talkers. Her heart beat as she had +seldom known it, but she continued to make a pretence of looking at the +pictures on the walls and the ornaments on the tables, while she hoped +that, as she preferred it, it would be also the course her father would +like best. She hoped “awfully,” as she would have said, that he wouldn’t +think her rude. She was a person of courage, and he was a kind, an +intensely good-natured man; nevertheless she went in some fear of him. +At home it had always been a religion with them to be nice to the people +he liked. How, in the old days, her mother, her incomparable mother, so +clever, so unerring, so perfect, how in the precious days her mother had +practised that art! Oh her mother, her irrecoverable mother! One of the +pictures she was looking at swam before her eyes. Mrs. Churchley, in the +natural course, would have begun immediately to climb staircases. Adela +could see the high bony shoulders and the long crimson tail and the +universal coruscating nod wriggle their horribly practical way through +the rest of the night. Therefore she _must_ have had her reasons for +detaining them. There were mothers who thought every one wanted to marry +their eldest son, and the girl sought to be clear as to whether she +herself belonged to the class of daughters who thought every one wanted +to marry their father. Her companions left her alone; and though she +didn’t want to be near them it angered her that Mrs. Churchley didn’t +call her. That proved she was conscious of the situation. She would +have called her, only Colonel Chart had perhaps dreadfully murmured +“Don’t, love, don’t.” This proved he also was conscious. The time was +really not long—ten minutes at the most elapsed—when he cried out gaily, +pleasantly, as if with a small jocular reproach, “I say, Adela, we must +release this dear lady!” He spoke of course as if it had been Adela’s +fault that they lingered. When they took leave she gave Mrs. Churchley, +without intention and without defiance, but from the simple sincerity of +her pain, a longer look into the eyes than she had ever given her before. +Mrs. Churchley’s onyx pupils reflected the question as distant dark +windows reflect the sunset; they seemed to say: “Yes, I _am_, if that’s +what you want to know!” + +What made the case worse, what made the girl more sure, was the silence +preserved by her companion in the brougham on their way home. They +rolled along in the June darkness from Prince’s Gate to Seymour Street, +each looking out of a window in conscious prudence; watching but not +seeing the hurry of the London night, the flash of lamps, the quick roll +on the wood of hansoms and other broughams. Adela had expected her +father would say something about Mrs. Churchley; but when he said nothing +it affected her, very oddly, still more as if he had spoken. In Seymour +Street he asked the footman if Mr. Godfrey had come in, to which the +servant replied that he had come in early and gone straight to his room. +Adela had gathered as much, without saying so, from a lighted window on +the second floor; but she contributed no remark to the question. At the +foot of the stairs her father halted as if he had something on his mind; +but what it amounted to seemed only the dry “Good-night” with which he +presently ascended. It was the first time since her mother’s death that +he had bidden her good-night without kissing her. They were a kissing +family, and after that dire event the habit had taken a fresh spring. +She had left behind her such a general passion of regret that in kissing +each other they felt themselves a little to be kissing her. Now, as, +standing in the hall, with the stiff watching footman—she could have said +to him angrily “Go away!”—planted near her, she looked with unspeakable +pain at her father’s back while he mounted, the effect was of his having +withheld from another and a still more slighted cheek the touch of his +lips. + +He was going to his room, and after a moment she heard his door close. +Then she said to the servant “Shut up the house”—she tried to do +everything her mother had done, to be a little of what she had been, +conscious only of falling woefully short—and took her own way upstairs. +After she had reached her room she waited, listening, shaken by the +apprehension that she should hear her father come out again and go up to +Godfrey. He would go up to tell him, to have it over without delay, +precisely because it would be so difficult. She asked herself indeed why +he should tell Godfrey when he hadn’t taken the occasion—their drive home +being an occasion—to tell herself. However, she wanted no announcing, no +telling; there was such a horrible clearness in her mind that what she +now waited for was only to be sure her father wouldn’t proceed as she had +imagined. At the end of the minutes she saw this particular danger was +over, upon which she came out and made her own way to her brother. +Exactly what she wanted to say to him first, if their parent counted on +the boy’s greater indulgence, and before he could say anything, was: +“Don’t forgive him; don’t, don’t!” + +He was to go up for an examination, poor lad, and during these weeks his +lamp burned till the small hours. It was for the Foreign Office, and +there was to be some frightful number of competitors; but Adela had great +hopes of him—she believed so in his talents and saw with pity how hard he +worked. This would have made her spare him, not trouble his night, his +scanty rest, if anything less dreadful had been at stake. It was a +blessing however that one could count on his coolness, young as he +was—his bright good-looking discretion, the thing that already made him +half a man of the world. Moreover he was the one who would care most. +If Basil was the eldest son—he had as a matter of course gone into the +army and was in India, on the staff, by good luck, of a +governor-general—it was exactly this that would make him comparatively +indifferent. His life was elsewhere, and his father and he had been in a +measure military comrades, so that he would be deterred by a certain +delicacy from protesting; he wouldn’t have liked any such protest in an +affair of _his_. Beatrice and Muriel would care, but they were too young +to speak, and this was just why her own responsibility was so great. + +Godfrey was in working-gear—shirt and trousers and slippers and a +beautiful silk jacket. His room felt hot, though a window was open to +the summer night; the lamp on the table shed its studious light over a +formidable heap of text-books and papers, the bed moreover showing how he +had flung himself down to think out a problem. As soon as she got in she +began. “Father’s going to marry Mrs. Churchley, you know.” + +She saw his poor pink face turn pale. “How do you know?” + +“I’ve seen with my eyes. We’ve been dining there—we’ve just come home. +He’s in love with her. She’s in love with _him_. They’ll arrange it.” + +“Oh I say!” Godfrey exclaimed, incredulous. + +“He will, he will, he will!” cried the girl; and with it she burst into +tears. + +Godfrey, who had a cigarette in his hand, lighted it at one of the +candles on the mantelpiece as if he were embarrassed. As Adela, who had +dropped into his armchair, continued to sob, he said after a moment: “He +oughtn’t to—he oughtn’t to.” + +“Oh think of mamma—think of mamma!” she wailed almost louder than was +safe. + +“Yes, he ought to think of mamma.” With which Godfrey looked at the tip +of his cigarette. + +“To such a woman as that—after _her_!” + +“Dear old mamma!” said Godfrey while he smoked. + +Adela rose again, drying her eyes. “It’s like an insult to her; it’s as +if he denied her.” Now that she spoke of it she felt herself rise to a +height. “He rubs out at a stroke all the years of their happiness.” + +“They were awfully happy,” Godfrey agreed. + +“Think what she was—think how no one else will ever again be like her!” +the girl went on. + +“I suppose he’s not very happy now,” her brother vaguely contributed. + +“Of course he isn’t, any more than you and I are; and it’s dreadful of +him to want to be.” + +“Well, don’t make yourself miserable till you’re sure,” the young man +said. + +But Adela showed him confidently that she _was_ sure, from the way the +pair had behaved together and from her father’s attitude on the drive +home. If Godfrey had been there he would have seen everything; it +couldn’t be explained, but he would have felt. When he asked at what +moment the girl had first had her suspicion she replied that it had all +come at once, that evening; or that at least she had had no conscious +fear till then. There had been signs for two or three weeks, but she +hadn’t understood them—ever since the day Mrs. Churchley had dined in +Seymour Street. Adela had on that occasion thought it odd her father +should have wished to invite her, given the quiet way they were living; +she was a person they knew so little. He had said something about her +having been very civil to him, and that evening, already, she had guessed +that he must have frequented their portentous guest herself more than +there had been signs of. To-night it had come to her clearly that he +would have called on her every day since the time of her dining with +them; every afternoon about the hour he was ostensibly at his club. Mrs. +Churchley _was_ his club—she was for all the world just like one. At +this Godfrey laughed; he wanted to know what his sister knew about clubs. +She was slightly disappointed in his laugh, even wounded by it, but she +knew perfectly what she meant: she meant that Mrs. Churchley was public +and florid, promiscuous and mannish. + +“Oh I daresay she’s all right,” he said as if he wanted to get on with +his work. He looked at the clock on the mantel-shelf; he would have to +put in another hour. + +“All right to come and take darling mamma’s place—to sit where _she_ used +to sit, to lay her horrible hands on _her_ things?” Adela was +appalled—all the more that she hadn’t expected it—at her brother’s +apparent acceptance of such a prospect. + +He coloured; there was something in her passionate piety that scorched +him. She glared at him with tragic eyes—he might have profaned an altar. +“Oh I mean that nothing will come of it.” + +“Not if we do our duty,” said Adela. And then as he looked as if he +hadn’t an idea of what that could be: “You must speak to him—tell him how +we feel; that we shall never forgive him, that we can’t endure it.” + +“He’ll think I’m cheeky,” her brother returned, looking down at his +papers with his back to her and his hands in his pockets. + +“Cheeky to plead for _her_ memory?” + +“He’ll say it’s none of my business.” + +“Then you believe he’ll do it?” cried the girl. + +“Not a bit. Go to bed!” + +“_I’ll_ speak to him”—she had turned as pale as a young priestess. + +“Don’t cry out till you’re hurt; wait till he speaks to _you_.” + +“He won’t, he won’t!” she declared. “He’ll do it without telling us.” + +Her brother had faced round to her again; he started a little at this, +and again, at one of the candles, lighted his cigarette, which had gone +out. She looked at him a moment; then he said something that surprised +her. “Is Mrs. Churchley very rich?” + +“I haven’t the least idea. What on earth has that to do with it?” + +Godfrey puffed his cigarette. “Does she live as if she were?” + +“She has a lot of hideous showy things.” + +“Well, we must keep our eyes open,” he concluded. “And now you _must_ +let me get on.” He kissed his visitor as if to make up for dismissing +her, or for his failure to take fire; and she held him a moment, burying +her head on his shoulder. + +A wave of emotion surged through her, and again she quavered out: “Ah why +did she leave us? Why did she leave us?” + +“Yes, why indeed?” the young man sighed, disengaging himself with a +movement of oppression. + + + + +II + + +ADELA was so far right as that by the end of the week, though she +remained certain, her father had still not made the announcement she +dreaded. What convinced her was the sense of her changed relations with +him—of there being between them something unexpressed, something she was +aware of as she would have been of an open wound. When she spoke of this +to Godfrey he said the change was of her own making—also that she was +cruelly unjust to the governor. She suffered even more from her +brother’s unexpected perversity; she had had so different a theory about +him that her disappointment was almost an humiliation and she needed all +her fortitude to pitch her faith lower. She wondered what had happened +to him and why he so failed her. She would have trusted him to feel +right about anything, above all about such a question. Their worship of +their mother’s memory, their recognition of her sacred place in their +past, her exquisite influence in their father’s life, his fortune, his +career, in the whole history of the family and welfare of the +house—accomplished clever gentle good beautiful and capable as she had +been, a woman whose quiet distinction was universally admired, so that on +her death one of the Princesses, the most august of her friends, had +written Adela such a note about her as princesses were understood very +seldom to write: their hushed tenderness over all this was like a +religion, and was also an attributive honour, to fall away from which was +a form of treachery. This wasn’t the way people usually felt in London, +she knew; but strenuous ardent observant girl as she was, with secrecies +of sentiment and dim originalities of attitude, she had already made up +her mind that London was no treasure-house of delicacies. Remembrance +there was hammered thin—to be faithful was to make society gape. The +patient dead were sacrificed; they had no shrines, for people were +literally ashamed of mourning. When they had hustled all sensibility out +of their lives they invented the fiction that they felt too much to +utter. Adela said nothing to her sisters; this reticence was part of the +virtue it was her idea to practise for them. _She_ was to be their +mother, a direct deputy and representative. Before the vision of that +other woman parading in such a character she felt capable of ingenuities, +of deep diplomacies. The essence of these indeed was just tremulously to +watch her father. Five days after they had dined together at Mrs. +Churchley’s he asked her if she had been to see that lady. + +“No indeed, why should I?” Adela knew that he knew she hadn’t been, since +Mrs. Churchley would have told him. + +“Don’t you call on people after you dine with them?” said Colonel Chart. + +“Yes, in the course of time. I don’t rush off within the week.” + +Her father looked at her, and his eyes were colder than she had ever seen +them, which was probably, she reflected, just the way hers appeared to +himself. “Then you’ll please rush off to-morrow. She’s to dine with us +on the 12th, and I shall expect your sisters to come down.” + +Adela stared. “To a dinner-party?” + +“It’s not to be a dinner-party. I want them to know Mrs. Churchley.” + +“Is there to be nobody else?” + +“Godfrey of course. A family party,” he said with an assurance before +which she turned cold. + +The girl asked her brother that evening if _that_ wasn’t tantamount to an +announcement. He looked at her queerly and then said: “_I’ve_ been to +see her.” + +“What on earth did you do that for?” + +“Father told me he wished it.” + +“Then he _has_ told you?” + +“Told me what?” Godfrey asked while her heart sank with the sense of his +making difficulties for her. + +“That they’re engaged, of course. What else can all this mean?” + +“He didn’t tell me that, but I like her.” + +“_Like_ her!” the girl shrieked. + +“She’s very kind, very good.” + +“To thrust herself upon us when we hate her? Is that what you call kind? +Is that what you call decent?” + +“Oh _I_ don’t hate her”—and he turned away as if she bored him. + +She called the next day on Mrs. Churchley, designing to break out +somehow, to plead, to appeal—“Oh spare us! have mercy on us! let him +alone! go away!” But that wasn’t easy when they were face to face. Mrs. +Churchley had every intention of getting, as she would have said—she was +perpetually using the expression—into touch; but her good intentions were +as depressing as a tailor’s misfits. She could never understand that +they had no place for her vulgar charity, that their life was filled with +a fragrance of perfection for which she had no sense fine enough. She +was as undomestic as a shop-front and as out of tune as a parrot. She +would either make them live in the streets or bring the streets into +their life—it was the same thing. She had evidently never read a book, +and she used intonations that Adela had never heard, as if she had been +an Australian or an American. She understood everything in a vulgar +sense; speaking of Godfrey’s visit to her and praising him according to +her idea, saying horrid things about him—that he was awfully +good-looking, a perfect gentleman, the kind she liked. How could her +father, who was after all in everything else such a dear, listen to a +woman, or endure her, who thought she pleased him when she called the son +of his dead wife a perfect gentleman? What would he have been, pray? +Much she knew about what any of them were! When she told Adela she wanted +her to like her the girl thought for an instant her opportunity had +come—the chance to plead with her and beg her off. But she presented +such an impenetrable surface that it would have been like giving a +message to a varnished door. She wasn’t a woman, said Adela; she was an +address. + +When she dined in Seymour Street the “children,” as the girl called the +others, including Godfrey, liked her. Beatrice and Muriel stared shyly +and silently at the wonders of her apparel (she was brutally +over-dressed) without of course guessing the danger that tainted the air. +They supposed her in their innocence to be amusing, and they didn’t know, +any more than she did herself, how she patronised them. When she was +upstairs with them after dinner Adela could see her look round the room +at the things she meant to alter—their mother’s things, not a bit like +her own and not good enough for her. After a quarter of an hour of this +our young lady felt sure she was deciding that Seymour Street wouldn’t do +at all, the dear old home that had done for their mother those twenty +years. Was she plotting to transport them all to her horrible Prince’s +Gate? Of one thing at any rate Adela was certain: her father, at that +moment alone in the dining-room with Godfrey, pretending to drink another +glass of wine to make time, was coming to the point, was telling the +news. When they reappeared they both, to her eyes, looked unnatural: the +news had been told. + +She had it from Godfrey before Mrs. Churchley left the house, when, after +a brief interval, he followed her out of the drawing-room on her taking +her sisters to bed. She was waiting for him at the door of her room. +Her father was then alone with his _fiancée_—the word was grotesque to +Adela; it was already as if the place were her home. + +“What did you say to him?” our young woman asked when her brother had +told her. + +“I said nothing.” Then he added, colouring—the expression of her face +was such—“There was nothing to say.” + +“Is that how it strikes you?”—and she stared at the lamp. + +“He asked me to speak to her,” Godfrey went on. + +“In what hideous sense?” + +“To tell her I was glad.” + +“And did you?” Adela panted. + +“I don’t know. I said something. She kissed me.” + +“Oh how _could_ you?” shuddered the girl, who covered her face with her +hands. + +“He says she’s very rich,” her brother returned. + +“Is that why you kissed her?” + +“I didn’t kiss her. Good-night.” And the young man, turning his back, +went out. + +When he had gone Adela locked herself in as with the fear she should be +overtaken or invaded, and during a sleepless feverish memorable night she +took counsel of her uncompromising spirit. She saw things as they were, +in all the indignity of life. The levity, the mockery, the infidelity, +the ugliness, lay as plain as a map before her; it was a world of gross +practical jokes, a world _pour rire_; but she cried about it all the +same. The morning dawned early, or rather it seemed to her there had +been no night, nothing but a sickly creeping day. But by the time she +heard the house stirring again she had determined what to do. When she +came down to the breakfast-room her father was already in his place with +newspapers and letters; and she expected the first words he would utter +to be a rebuke to her for having disappeared the night before without +taking leave of Mrs. Churchley. Then she saw he wished to be intensely +kind, to make every allowance, to conciliate and console her. He knew +she had heard from Godfrey, and he got up and kissed her. He told her as +quickly as possible, to have it over, stammering a little, with an “I’ve +a piece of news for you that will probably shock you,” yet looking even +exaggeratedly grave and rather pompous, to inspire the respect he didn’t +deserve. When he kissed her she melted, she burst into tears. He held +her against him, kissing her again and again, saying tenderly “Yes, yes, +I know, I know.” But he didn’t know else he couldn’t have done it. +Beatrice and Muriel came in, frightened when they saw her crying, and +still more scared when she turned to them with words and an air that were +terrible in their comfortable little lives: “Papa’s going to be married; +he’s going to marry Mrs. Churchley!” After staring a moment and seeing +their father look as strange, on his side, as Adela, though in a +different way, the children also began to cry, so that when the servants +arrived with tea and boiled eggs these functionaries were greatly +embarrassed with their burden, not knowing whether to come in or hang +back. They all scraped together a decorum, and as soon as the things had +been put on table the Colonel banished the men with a glance. Then he +made a little affectionate speech to Beatrice and Muriel, in which he +described Mrs. Churchley as the kindest, the most delightful of women, +only wanting to make them happy, only wanting to make _him_ happy, and +convinced that he would be if they were and that they would be if he was. + +“What do such words mean?” Adela asked herself. She declared privately +that they meant nothing, but she was silent, and every one was silent, on +account of the advent of Miss Flynn the governess, before whom Colonel +Chart preferred not to discuss the situation. Adela recognised on the +spot that if things were to go as he wished his children would +practically never again be alone with him. He would spend all his time +with Mrs. Churchley till they were married, and then Mrs. Churchley would +spend all her time with him. Adela was ashamed of him, and that was +horrible—all the more that every one else would be, all his other +friends, every one who had known her mother. But the public dishonour to +that high memory shouldn’t be enacted; he shouldn’t do as he wished. + +After breakfast her father remarked to her that it would give him +pleasure if in a day or two she would take her sisters to see their +friend, and she replied that he should be obeyed. He held her hand a +moment, looking at her with an argument in his eyes which presently +hardened into sternness. He wanted to know that she forgave him, but +also wanted to assure her that he expected her to mind what she did, to +go straight. She turned away her eyes; she was indeed ashamed of him. + +She waited three days and then conveyed her sisters to the _repaire_, as +she would have been ready to term it, of the lioness. That queen of +beasts was surrounded with callers, as Adela knew she would be; it was +her “day” and the occasion the girl preferred. Before this she had spent +all her time with her companions, talking to them about their mother, +playing on their memory of her, making them cry and making them laugh, +reminding them of blest hours of their early childhood, telling them +anecdotes of her own. None the less she confided to them that she +believed there was no harm at all in Mrs. Churchley, and that when the +time should come she would probably take them out immensely. She saw +with smothered irritation that they enjoyed their visit at Prince’s Gate; +they had never been at anything so “grown-up,” nor seen so many smart +bonnets and brilliant complexions. Moreover they were considered with +interest, quite as if, being minor elements, yet perceptible ones, of +Mrs. Churchley’s new life, they had been described in advance and were +the heroines of the occasion. There were so many ladies present that +this personage didn’t talk to them much; she only called them her +“chicks” and asked them to hand about tea-cups and bread and butter. All +of which was highly agreeable and indeed intensely exciting to Beatrice +and Muriel, who had little round red spots in _their_ cheeks when they +came away. Adela quivered with the sense that her mother’s children were +now Mrs. Churchley’s “chicks” and a part of the furniture of Mrs. +Churchley’s dreadful consciousness. + +It was one thing to have made up her mind, however; it was another thing +to make her attempt. It was when she learned from Godfrey that the day +was fixed, the 20th of July, only six weeks removed, that she felt the +importance of prompt action. She learned everything from Godfrey now, +having decided it would be hypocrisy to question her father. Even her +silence was hypocritical, but she couldn’t weep and wail. Her father +showed extreme tact; taking no notice of her detachment, treating it as a +moment of _bouderie_ he was bound to allow her and that would pout itself +away. She debated much as to whether she should take Godfrey into her +confidence; she would have done so without hesitation if he hadn’t +disappointed her. He was so little what she might have expected, and so +perversely preoccupied that she could explain it only by the high +pressure at which he was living, his anxiety about his “exam.” He was in +a fidget, in a fever, putting on a spurt to come in first; sceptical +moreover about his success and cynical about everything else. He +appeared to agree to the general axiom that they didn’t want a strange +woman thrust into their life, but he found Mrs. Churchley “very jolly as +a person to know.” He had been to see her by himself—he had been to see +her three times. He in fact gave it out that he would make the most of +her now; he should probably be so little in Seymour Street after these +days. What Adela at last determined to give him was her assurance that +the marriage would never take place. When he asked what she meant and +who was to prevent it she replied that the interesting couple would +abandon the idea of themselves, or that Mrs. Churchley at least would +after a week or two back out of it. + +“That will be really horrid then,” Godfrey pronounced. “The only +respectable thing, at the point they’ve come to, is to put it through. +Charming for poor Dad to have the air of being ‘chucked’!” + +This made her hesitate two days more, but she found answers more valid +than any objections. The many-voiced answer to everything—it was like +the autumn wind round the house—was the affront that fell back on her +mother. Her mother was dead but it killed her again. So one morning at +eleven o’clock, when she knew her father was writing letters, she went +out quietly and, stopping the first hansom she met, drove to Prince’s +Gate. Mrs. Churchley was at home, and she was shown into the +drawing-room with the request that she would wait five minutes. She +waited without the sense of breaking down at the last, and the impulse to +run away, which were what she had expected to have. In the cab and at +the door her heart had beat terribly, but now suddenly, with the game +really to play, she found herself lucid and calm. It was a joy to her to +feel later that this was the way Mrs. Churchley found her: not confused, +not stammering nor prevaricating, only a little amazed at her own +courage, conscious of the immense responsibility of her step and +wonderfully older than her years. Her hostess sounded her at first with +suspicious eyes, but eventually, to Adela’s surprise, burst into tears. +At this the girl herself cried, and with the secret happiness of +believing they were saved. Mrs. Churchley said she would think over what +she had been told, and she promised her young friend, freely enough and +very firmly, not to betray the secret of the latter’s step to the +Colonel. They were saved—they were saved: the words sung themselves in +the girl’s soul as she came downstairs. When the door opened for her she +saw her brother on the step, and they looked at each other in surprise, +each finding it on the part of the other an odd hour for Prince’s Gate. +Godfrey remarked that Mrs. Churchley would have enough of the family, and +Adela answered that she would perhaps have too much. None the less the +young man went in while his sister took her way home. + + + + +III + + +SHE saw nothing of him for nearly a week; he had more and more his own +times and hours, adjusted to his tremendous responsibilities, and he +spent whole days at his crammer’s. When she knocked at his door late in +the evening he was regularly not in his room. It was known in the house +how much he was worried; he was horribly nervous about his ordeal. It +was to begin on the 23rd of June, and his father was as worried as +himself. The wedding had been arranged in relation to this; they wished +poor Godfrey’s fate settled first, though they felt the nuptials would be +darkened if it shouldn’t be settled right. + +Ten days after that performance of her private undertaking Adela began to +sniff, as it were, a difference in the general air; but as yet she was +afraid to exult. It wasn’t in truth a difference for the better, so that +there might be still a great tension. Her father, since the announcement +of his intended marriage, had been visibly pleased with himself, but that +pleasure now appeared to have undergone a check. She had the impression +known to the passengers on a great steamer when, in the middle of the +night, they feel the engines stop. As this impression may easily sharpen +to the sense that something serious has happened, so the girl asked +herself what had actually occurred. She had expected something serious; +but it was as if she couldn’t keep still in her cabin—she wanted to go up +and see. On the 20th, just before breakfast, her maid brought her a +message from her brother. Mr. Godfrey would be obliged if she would +speak to him in his room. She went straight up to him, dreading to find +him ill, broken down on the eve of his formidable week. This was not the +case however—he rather seemed already at work, to have been at work since +dawn. But he was very white and his eyes had a strange and new +expression. Her beautiful young brother looked older; he looked haggard +and hard. He met her there as if he had been waiting for her, and he +said at once: “Please tell me this, Adela—what was the purpose of your +visit the other morning to Mrs. Churchley, the day I met you at her +door?” + +She stared—she cast about. “The purpose? What’s the matter? Why do you +ask?” + +“They’ve put it off—they’ve put it off a month.” + +“Ah thank God!” said Adela. + +“Why the devil do you thank God?” Godfrey asked with a strange +impatience. + +She gave a strained intense smile. “You know I think it all wrong.” + +He stood looking at her up and down. “What did you do there? How did +you interfere?” + +“Who told you I interfered?” she returned with a deep flush. + +“You said something—you did something. I knew you had done it when I saw +you come out.” + +“What I did was my own business.” + +“Damn your own business!” cried the young man. + +She had never in her life been so spoken to, and in advance, had she been +given the choice, would have said that she’d rather die than be so +handled by Godfrey. But her spirit was high, and for a moment she was as +angry as if she had been cut with a whip. She escaped the blow but felt +the insult. “And _your_ business then?” she asked. “I wondered what +that was when I saw _you_.” + +He stood a moment longer scowling at her; then with the exclamation +“You’ve made a pretty mess!” he turned away from her and sat down to his +books. + +They had put it off, as he said; her father was dry and stiff and +official about it. “I suppose I had better let you know we’ve thought it +best to postpone our marriage till the end of the summer—Mrs. Churchley +has so many arrangements to make”: he was not more expansive than that. +She neither knew nor greatly cared whether she but vainly imagined or +correctly observed him to watch her obliquely for some measure of her +receipt of these words. She flattered herself that, thanks to Godfrey’s +forewarning, cruel as the form of it had been, she was able to repress +any crude sign of elation. She had a perfectly good conscience, for she +could now judge what odious elements Mrs. Churchley, whom she had not +seen since the morning in Prince’s Gate, had already introduced into +their dealings. She gathered without difficulty that her father hadn’t +concurred in the postponement, for he was more restless than before, more +absent and distinctly irritable. There was naturally still the question +of how much of this condition was to be attributed to his solicitude +about Godfrey. That young man took occasion to say a horrible thing to +his sister: “If I don’t pass it will be your fault.” These were dreadful +days for the girl, and she asked herself how she could have borne them if +the hovering spirit of her mother hadn’t been at her side. Fortunately +she always felt it there, sustaining, commending, sanctifying. Suddenly +her father announced to her that he wished her to go immediately, with +her sisters, down to Brinton, where there was always part of a household +and where for a few weeks they would manage well enough. The only +explanation he gave of this desire was that he wanted them out of the +way. “Out of the way of what?” she queried, since there were to be for +the time no preparations in Seymour Street. She was willing to take it +for out of the way of his nerves. + +She never needed urging however to go to Brinton, the dearest old house +in the world, where the happiest days of her young life had been spent +and the silent nearness of her mother always seemed greatest. She was +happy again, with Beatrice and Muriel and Miss Flynn, with the air of +summer and the haunted rooms and her mother’s garden and the talking oaks +and the nightingales. She wrote briefly to her father, giving him, as he +had requested, an account of things; and he wrote back that since she was +so contented—she didn’t recognise having told him that—she had better not +return to town at all. The fag-end of the London season would be +unimportant to her, and he was getting on very well. He mentioned that +Godfrey had passed his tests, but, as she knew, there would be a tiresome +wait before news of results. The poor chap was going abroad for a month +with young Sherard—he had earned a little rest and a little fun. He went +abroad without a word to Adela, but in his beautiful little hand he took +a chaffing leave of Beatrice. The child showed her sister the letter, of +which she was very proud and which contained no message for any one else. +This was the worst bitterness of the whole crisis for that somebody—its +placing in so strange a light the creature in the world whom, after her +mother, she had loved best. + +Colonel Chart had said he would “run down” while his children were at +Brinton, but they heard no more about it. He only wrote two or three +times to Miss Flynn on matters in regard to which Adela was surprised he +shouldn’t have communicated with herself. Muriel accomplished an upright +little letter to Mrs. Churchley—her eldest sister neither fostered nor +discouraged the performance—to which Mrs. Churchley replied, after a +fortnight, in a meagre and, as Adela thought, illiterate fashion, making +no allusion to the approach of any closer tie. Evidently the situation +had changed; the question of the marriage was dropped, at any rate for +the time. This idea gave our young woman a singular and almost +intoxicating sense of power; she felt as if she were riding a great wave +of confidence. She had decided and acted—the greatest could do no more +than that. The grand thing was to see one’s results, and what else was +she doing? These results were in big rich conspicuous lives; the stage +was large on which she moved her figures. Such a vision was exciting, +and as they had the use of a couple of ponies at Brinton she worked off +her excitement by a long gallop. A day or two after this however came +news of which the effect was to rekindle it. Godfrey had come back, the +list had been published, he had passed first. These happy tidings +proceeded from the young man himself; he announced them by a telegram to +Beatrice, who had never in her life before received such a missive and +was proportionately inflated. Adela reflected that she herself ought to +have felt snubbed, but she was too happy. They were free again, they +were themselves, the nightmare of the previous weeks was blown away, the +unity and dignity of her father’s life restored, and, to round off her +sense of success, Godfrey had achieved his first step toward high +distinction. She wrote him the next day as frankly and affectionately as +if there had been no estrangement between them, and besides telling him +how she rejoiced in his triumph begged him in charity to let them know +exactly how the case stood with regard to Mrs. Churchley. + +Late in the summer afternoon she walked through the park to the village +with her letter, posted it and came back. Suddenly, at one of the turns +of the avenue, half-way to the house, she saw a young man hover there as +if awaiting her—a young man who proved to be Godfrey on his pedestrian +progress over from the station. He had seen her as he took his short +cut, and if he had come down to Brinton it wasn’t apparently to avoid +her. There was nevertheless none of the joy of his triumph in his face +as he came a very few steps to meet her; and although, stiffly enough, he +let her kiss him and say “I’m so glad—I’m so glad!” she felt this +tolerance as not quite the mere calm of the rising diplomatist. He +turned toward the house with her and walked on a short distance while she +uttered the hope that he had come to stay some days. + +“Only till to-morrow morning. They’re sending me straight to Madrid. I +came down to say good-bye; there’s a fellow bringing my bags.” + +“To Madrid? How awfully nice! And it’s awfully nice of you to have +come,” she said as she passed her hand into his arm. + +The movement made him stop, and, stopping, he turned on her in a flash a +face of something more than, suspicion—of passionate reprobation. “What +I really came for—you might as well know without more delay—is to ask you +a question.” + +“A question?”—she echoed it with a beating heart. + +They stood there under the old trees in the lingering light, and, young +and fine and fair as they both were, formed a complete superficial +harmony with the peaceful English scene. A near view, however, would +have shown that Godfrey Chart hadn’t taken so much trouble only to skim +the surface. He looked deep into his sister’s eyes. “What was it you +said that morning to Mrs. Churchley?” + +She fixed them on the ground a moment, but at last met his own again. +“If she has told you, why do you ask?” + +“She has told me nothing. I’ve seen for myself.” + +“What have you seen?” + +“She has broken it off. Everything’s over. Father’s in the depths.” + +“In the depths?” the girl quavered. + +“Did you think it would make him jolly?” he went on. + +She had to choose what to say. “He’ll get over it. He’ll he glad.” + +“That remains to be seen. You interfered, you invented something, you +got round her. I insist on knowing what you did.” + +Adela felt that if it was a question of obstinacy there was something +within her she could count on; in spite of which, while she stood looking +down again a moment, she said to herself “I could be dumb and dogged if I +chose, but I scorn to be.” She wasn’t ashamed of what she had done, but +she wanted to be clear. “Are you absolutely certain it’s broken off?” + +“He is, and she is; so that’s as good.” + +“What reason has she given?” + +“None at all—or half a dozen; it’s the same thing. She has changed her +mind—she mistook her feelings—she can’t part with her independence. +Moreover he has too many children.” + +“Did he tell you this?” the girl asked. + +“Mrs. Churchley told me. She has gone abroad for a year.” + +“And she didn’t tell you what I said to her?” + +Godfrey showed an impatience. “Why should I take this trouble if she +had?” + +“You might have taken it to make me suffer,” said Adela. “That appears +to be what you want to do.” + +“No, I leave that to you—it’s the good turn you’ve done me!” cried the +young man with hot tears in his eyes. + +She stared, aghast with the perception that there was some dreadful thing +she didn’t know; but he walked on, dropping the question angrily and +turning his back to her as if he couldn’t trust himself. She read his +disgust in his averted, face, in the way he squared his shoulders and +smote the ground with his stick, and she hurried after him and presently +overtook him. She kept by him for a moment in silence; then she broke +out: “What do you mean? What in the world have I done to you?” + +“She would have helped me. She was all ready to help me,” Godfrey +portentously said. + +“Helped you in what?” She wondered what he meant; if he had made debts +that he was afraid to confess to his father and—of all horrible +things—had been looking to Mrs. Churchley to pay. She turned red with +the mere apprehension of this and, on the heels of her guess, exulted +again at having perhaps averted such a shame. + +“Can’t you just see I’m in trouble? Where are your eyes, your senses, +your sympathy, that you talk so much about? Haven’t you seen these six +months that I’ve a curst worry in my life?” + +She seized his arm, made him stop, stood looking up at him like a +frightened little girl. “What’s the matter, Godfrey?—what _is_ the +matter?” + +“You’ve gone against me so—I could strangle you!” he growled. This image +added nothing to her dread; her dread was that he had done some wrong, +was stained with some guilt. She uttered it to him with clasped hands, +begging him to tell her the worst; but, still more passionately, he cut +her short with his own cry: “In God’s name, satisfy me! What infernal +thing did you do?” + +“It wasn’t infernal—it was right. I told her mamma had been wretched,” +said Adela. + +“Wretched? You told her such a lie?” + +“It was the only way, and she believed me.” + +“Wretched how?—wretched when?—wretched where?” the young man stammered. + +“I told her papa had made her so, and that _she_ ought to know it. I +told her the question troubled me unspeakably, but that I had made up my +mind it was my duty to initiate her.” Adela paused, the light of bravado +in her face, as if, though struck while the words came with the +monstrosity of what she had done, she was incapable of abating a jot of +it. “I notified her that he had faults and peculiarities that made +mamma’s life a long worry—a martyrdom that she hid wonderfully from the +world, but that we saw and that I had often pitied. I told her what they +were, these faults and peculiarities; I put the dots on the i’s. I said +it wasn’t fair to let another person marry him without a warning. I +warned her; I satisfied my conscience. She could do as she liked. My +responsibility was over.” + +Godfrey gazed at her; he listened with parted lips, incredulous and +appalled. “You invented such a tissue of falsities and calumnies, and +you talk about your conscience? You stand there in your senses and +proclaim your crime?” + +“I’d have committed any crime that would have rescued us.” + +“You insult and blacken and ruin your own father?” Godfrey kept on. + +“He’ll never know it; she took a vow she wouldn’t tell him.” + +“Ah I’ll he damned if _I_ won’t tell him!” he rang out. + +Adela felt sick at this, but she flamed up to resent the treachery, as it +struck her, of such a menace. “I did right—I did right!” she vehemently +declared “I went down on my knees to pray for guidance, and I saved +mamma’s memory from outrage. But if I hadn’t, if I hadn’t”—she faltered +an instant—“I’m not worse than you, and I’m not so bad, for you’ve done +something that you’re ashamed to tell me.” + +He had taken out his watch; he looked at it with quick intensity, as if +not hearing nor heeding her. Then, his calculating eyes raised, he fixed +her long enough to exclaim with unsurpassable horror and contempt: “You +raving maniac!” He turned away from her; he bounded down the avenue in +the direction from which they had come, and, while she watched him, +strode away, across the grass, toward the short cut to the station. + + + + +IV + + +HIS bags, by the time she got home, had been brought to the house, but +Beatrice and Muriel, immediately informed of this, waited for their +brother in vain. Their sister said nothing to them of her having seen +him, and she accepted after a little, with a calmness that surprised +herself, the idea that he had returned to town to denounce her. She +believed this would make no difference now—she had done what she had +done. She had somehow a stiff faith in Mrs. Churchley. Once that so +considerable mass had received its impetus it wouldn’t, it couldn’t pull +up. It represented a heavy-footed person, incapable of further agility. +Adela recognised too how well it might have come over her that there were +too many children. Lastly the girl fortified herself with the reflexion, +grotesque in the conditions and conducing to prove her sense of humour +not high, that her father was after all not a man to be played with. It +seemed to her at any rate that if she _had_ baffled his unholy purpose +she could bear anything—bear imprisonment and bread and water, bear +lashes and torture, bear even his lifelong reproach. What she could bear +least was the wonder of the inconvenience she had inflicted on Godfrey. +She had time to turn this over, very vainly, for a succession of +days—days more numerous than she had expected, which passed without +bringing her from London any summons to come up and take her punishment. +She sounded the possible, she compared the degrees of the probable; +feeling however that as a cloistered girl she was poorly equipped for +speculation. She tried to imagine the calamitous things young men might +do, and could only feel that such things would naturally be connected +either with borrowed money or with bad women. She became conscious that +after all she knew almost nothing about either of those interests. The +worst woman she knew was Mrs. Churchley herself. Meanwhile there was no +reverberation from Seymour Street—only a sultry silence. + +At Brinton she spent hours in her mother’s garden, where she had grown +up, where she considered that she was training for old age, since she +meant not to depend on whist. She loved the place as, had she been a +good Catholic, she would have loved the smell of her parish church; and +indeed there was in her passion for flowers something of the respect of a +religion. They seemed to her the only things in the world that really +respected themselves, unless one made an exception for Nutkins, who had +been in command all through her mother’s time, with whom she had had a +real friendship and who had been affected by their pure example. He was +the person left in the world with whom on the whole she could speak most +intimately of the dead. They never had to name her together—they only +said “she”; and Nutkins freely conceded that she had taught him +everything he knew. When Beatrice and Muriel said “she” they referred to +Mrs. Churchley. Adela had reason to believe she should never marry, and +that some day she should have about a thousand a year. This made her see +in the far future a little garden of her own, under a hill, full of rare +and exquisite things, where she would spend most of her old age on her +knees with an apron and stout gloves, with a pair of shears and a trowel, +steeped in the comfort of being thought mad. + +One morning ten days after her scene with Godfrey, on coming back into +the house shortly before lunch, she was met by Miss Flynn with the +notification that a lady in the drawing-room had been waiting for her for +some minutes. “A lady” suggested immediately Mrs. Churchley. It came +over Adela that the form in which her penalty was to descend would be a +personal explanation with that misdirected woman. The lady had given no +name, and Miss Flynn hadn’t seen Mrs. Churchley; nevertheless the +governess was certain Adela’s surmise was wrong. + +“Is she big and dreadful?” the girl asked. + +Miss Flynn, who was circumspection itself, took her time. “She’s +dreadful, but she’s not big.” She added that she wasn’t sure she ought +to let Adela go in alone; but this young lady took herself throughout for +a heroine, and it wasn’t in a heroine to shrink from any encounter. +Wasn’t she every instant in transcendent contact with her mother? The +visitor might have no connexion whatever with the drama of her father’s +frustrated marriage; but everything to-day for Adela was part of that. + +Miss Flynn’s description had prepared her for a considerable shock, but +she wasn’t agitated by her first glimpse of the person who awaited her. +A youngish well-dressed woman stood there, and silence was between them +while they looked at each other. Before either had spoken however Adela +began to see what Miss Flynn had intended. In the light of the +drawing-room window the lady was five-and-thirty years of age and had +vivid yellow hair. She also had a blue cloth suit with brass buttons, a +stick-up collar like a gentleman’s, a necktie arranged in a sailor’s +knot, a golden pin in the shape of a little lawn-tennis racket, and +pearl-grey gloves with big black stitchings. Adela’s second impression +was that she was an actress, and her third that no such person had ever +before crossed that threshold. + +“I’ll tell you what I’ve come for,” said the apparition. “I’ve come to +ask you to intercede.” She wasn’t an actress; an actress would have had +a nicer voice. + +“To intercede?” Adela was too bewildered to ask her to sit down. + +“With your father, you know. He doesn’t know, but he’ll have to.” Her +“have” sounded like “’ave.” She explained, with many more such sounds, +that she was Mrs. Godfrey, that they had been married seven mortal +months. If Godfrey was going abroad she must go with him, and the only +way she could go with him would be for his father to do something. He +was afraid of his father—that was clear; he was afraid even to tell him. +What she had come down for was to see some other member of the family +face to face—“fice to fice,” Mrs. Godfrey called it—and try if he +couldn’t be approached by another side. If no one else would act then +she would just have to act herself. The Colonel would have to do +something—that was the only way out of it. + +What really happened Adela never quite understood; what seemed to be +happening was that the room went round and round. Through the blur of +perception accompanying this effect the sharp stabs of her visitor’s +revelation came to her like the words heard by a patient “going off” +under ether. She afterwards denied passionately even to herself that she +had done anything so abject as to faint; but there was a lapse in her +consciousness on the score of Miss Flynn’s intervention. This +intervention had evidently been active, for when they talked the matter +over, later in the day, with bated breath and infinite dissimulation for +the school-room quarter, the governess had more lurid truths, and still +more, to impart than to receive. She was at any rate under the +impression that she had athletically contended, in the drawing-room, with +the yellow hair—this after removing Adela from the scene and before +inducing Mrs. Godfrey to withdraw. Miss Flynn had never known a more +thrilling day, for all the rest of it too was pervaded with agitations +and conversations, precautions and alarms. It was given out to Beatrice +and Muriel that their sister had been taken suddenly ill, and the +governess ministered to her in her room. Indeed Adela had never found +herself less at ease, for this time she had received a blow that she +couldn’t return. There was nothing to do but to take it, to endure the +humiliation of her wound. + +At first she declined to take it—having, as might appear, the much more +attractive resource of regarding her visitant as a mere masquerading +person, an impudent impostor. On the face of the matter moreover it +wasn’t fair to believe till one heard; and to hear in such a case was to +hear Godfrey himself. Whatever she had tried to imagine about him she +hadn’t arrived at anything so belittling as an idiotic secret marriage +with a dyed and painted hag. Adela repeated this last word as if it gave +her comfort; and indeed where everything was so bad fifteen years of +seniority made the case little worse. Miss Flynn was portentous, for +Miss Flynn had had it out with the wretch. She had cross-questioned her +and had not broken her down. This was the most uplifted hour of Miss +Flynn’s life; for whereas she usually had to content herself with being +humbly and gloomily in the right she could now be magnanimously and +showily so. Her only perplexity was as to what she ought to do—write to +Colonel Chart or go up to town to see him. She bloomed with +alternatives—she resembled some dull garden-path which under a copious +downpour has begun to flaunt with colour. Toward evening Adela was +obliged to recognise that her brother’s worry, of which he had spoken to +her, had appeared bad enough to consist even of a low wife, and to +remember that, so far from its being inconceivable a young man in his +position should clandestinely take one, she had been present, years +before, during her mother’s lifetime, when Lady Molesley declared gaily, +over a cup of tea, that this was precisely what she expected of her +eldest son. The next morning it was the worst possibilities that seemed +clearest; the only thing left with a tatter of dusky comfort being the +ambiguity of Godfrey’s charge that her own action had “done” for him. +That was a matter by itself, and she racked her brains for a connecting +link between Mrs. Churchley and Mrs. Godfrey. At last she made up her +mind that they were related by blood; very likely, though differing in +fortune, they were cousins or even sisters. But even then what did the +wretched boy mean? + +Arrested by the unnatural fascination of opportunity, Miss Flynn received +before lunch a telegram from Colonel Chart—an order for dinner and a +vehicle; he and Godfrey were to arrive at six o’clock. Adela had plenty +of occupation for the interval, since she was pitying her father when she +wasn’t rejoicing that her mother had gone too soon to know. She +flattered herself she made out the providential reason of that cruelty +now. She found time however still to wonder for what purpose, given the +situation, Godfrey was to be brought down. She wasn’t unconscious indeed +that she had little general knowledge of what usually was done with young +men in that predicament. One talked about the situation, but the +situation was an abyss. She felt this still more when she found, on her +father’s arrival, that nothing apparently was to happen as she had taken +for granted it would. There was an inviolable hush over the whole +affair, but no tragedy, no publicity, nothing ugly. The tragedy had been +in town—the faces of the two men spoke of it in spite of their other +perfunctory aspects; and at present there was only a family dinner, with +Beatrice and Muriel and the governess—with almost a company tone too, the +result of the desire to avoid publicity. Adela admired her father; she +knew what he was feeling if Mrs. Godfrey had been at him, and yet she saw +him positively gallant. He was mildly austere, or rather even—what was +it?—august; just as, coldly equivocal, he never looked at his son, so +that at moments he struck her as almost sick with sadness. Godfrey was +equally inscrutable and therefore wholly different from what he had been +as he stood before her in the park. If he was to start on his career +(with such a wife!—wouldn’t she utterly blight it?) he was already +professional enough to know how to wear a mask. + +Before they rose from table she felt herself wholly bewildered, so little +were such large causes traceable in their effects. She had nerved +herself for a great ordeal, but the air was as sweet as an anodyne. It +was perfectly plain to her that her father was deadly sore—as pathetic as +a person betrayed. He was broken, but he showed no resentment; there was +a weight on his heart, but he had lightened it by dressing as +immaculately as usual for dinner. She asked herself what immensity of a +row there could have been in town to have left his anger so spent. He +went through everything, even to sitting with his son after dinner. When +they came out together he invited Beatrice and Muriel to the +billiard-room, and as Miss Flynn discreetly withdrew Adela was left alone +with Godfrey, who was completely changed and not now in the least of a +rage. He was broken too, but not so pathetic as his father. He was only +very correct and apologetic he said to his sister: “I’m awfully sorry +_you_ were annoyed—it was something I never dreamed of.” + +She couldn’t think immediately what he meant; then she grasped the +reference to her extraordinary invader. She was uncertain, however, what +tone to take; perhaps his father had arranged with him that they were to +make the best of it. But she spoke her own despair in the way she +murmured “Oh Godfrey, Godfrey, is it true?” + +“I’ve been the most unutterable donkey—you can say what you like to me. +You can’t say anything worse than I’ve said to myself.” + +“My brother, my brother!”—his words made her wail it out. He hushed her +with a movement and she asked: “What has father said?” + +He looked very high over her head. “He’ll give her six hundred a year.” + +“Ah the angel!”—it was too splendid. + +“On condition”—Godfrey scarce blinked—“she never comes near me. She has +solemnly promised, and she’ll probably leave me alone to get the money. +If she doesn’t—in diplomacy—I’m lost.” He had been turning his eyes +vaguely about, this way and that, to avoid meeting hers; but after +another instant he gave up the effort and she had the miserable +confession of his glance. “I’ve been living in hell.” + +“My brother, my brother!” she yearningly repeated. + +“I’m not an idiot; yet for her I’ve behaved like one. Don’t ask me—you +mustn’t know. It was all done in a day, and since then fancy my +condition; fancy my work in such a torment; fancy my coming through at +all.” + +“Thank God you passed!” she cried. “You were wonderful!” + +“I’d have shot myself if I hadn’t been. I had an awful day yesterday +with the governor; it was late at night before it was over. I leave +England next week. He brought me down here for it to look well—so that +the children shan’t know.” + +“_He’s_ wonderful too!” Adela murmured. + +“Wonderful too!” Godfrey echoed. + +“Did _she_ tell him?” the girl went on. + +“She came straight to Seymour Street from here. She saw him alone first; +then he called me in. _That_ luxury lasted about an hour.” + +“Poor, poor father!” Adela moaned at this; on which her brother remained +silent. Then after he had alluded to it as the scene he had lived in +terror of all through his cramming, and she had sighed forth again her +pity and admiration for such a mixture of anxieties and such a triumph of +talent, she pursued: “Have you told him?” + +“Told him what?” + +“What you said you would—what _I_ did.” + +Godfrey turned away as if at present he had very little interest in that +inferior tribulation. “I was angry with you, but I cooled off. I held +my tongue.” + +She clasped her hands. “You thought of mamma!” + +“Oh don’t speak of mamma!” he cried as in rueful tenderness. + +It was indeed not a happy moment, and she murmured: “No; if you _had_ +thought of her—!” + +This made Godfrey face her again with a small flare in his eyes. “Oh +_then_ it didn’t prevent. I thought that woman really good. I believed +in her.” + +“Is she _very_ bad?” + +“I shall never mention her to you again,” he returned with dignity. + +“You may believe _I_ won’t speak of her! So father doesn’t know?” the +girl added. + +“Doesn’t know what?” + +“That I said what I did to Mrs. Churchley.” + +He had a momentary pause. “I don’t think so, but you must find out for +yourself.” + +“I shall find out,” said Adela. “But what had Mrs. Churchley to do with +it?” + +“With _my_ misery? I told her. I had to tell some one.” + +“Why didn’t you tell me?” + +He appeared—though but after an instant—to know exactly why. “Oh you +take things so beastly hard—you make such rows.” Adela covered her face +with her hands and he went on: “What I wanted was comfort—not to be +lashed up. I thought I should go mad. I wanted Mrs. Churchley to break +it to father, to intercede for me and help him to meet it. She was +awfully kind to me, she listened and she understood; she could fancy how +it had happened. Without her I shouldn’t have pulled through. She liked +me, you know,” he further explained, and as if it were quite worth +mentioning—all the more that it was pleasant to him. “She said she’d do +what she could for me. She was full of sympathy and resource. I really +leaned on her. But when _you_ cut in of course it spoiled everything. +That’s why I was so furious with you. She couldn’t do anything then.” + +Adela dropped her hands, staring; she felt she had walked in darkness. +“So that he had to meet it alone?” + +“_Dame_!” said Godfrey, who had got up his French tremendously. + +Muriel came to the door to say papa wished the two others to join them, +and the next day Godfrey returned to town. His father remained at +Brinton, without an intermission, the rest of the summer and the whole of +the autumn, and Adela had a chance to find out, as she had said, whether +he knew she had interfered. But in spite of her chance she never found +out. He knew Mrs. Churchley had thrown him over and he knew his daughter +rejoiced in it, but he appeared not to have divined the relation between +the two facts. It was strange that one of the matters he was clearest +about—Adela’s secret triumph—should have been just the thing which from +this time on justified less and less such a confidence. She was too +sorry for him to be consistently glad. She watched his attempts to wind +himself up on the subject of shorthorns and drainage, and she favoured to +the utmost of her ability his intermittent disposition to make a figure +in orchids. She wondered whether they mightn’t have a few people at +Brinton; but when she mentioned the idea he asked what in the world there +would be to attract them. It was a confoundedly stupid house, he +remarked—with all respect to _her_ cleverness. Beatrice and Muriel were +mystified; the prospect of going out immensely had faded so utterly away. +They were apparently not to go out at all. Colonel Chart was aimless and +bored; he paced up and down and went back to smoking, which was bad for +him, and looked drearily out of windows as if on the bare chance that +something might arrive. Did he expect Mrs. Churchley to arrive, did he +expect her to relent on finding she couldn’t live without him? It was +Adela’s belief that she gave no sign. But the girl thought it really +remarkable of her not to have betrayed her ingenious young visitor. +Adela’s judgement of human nature was perhaps harsh, but she believed +that most women, given the various facts, wouldn’t have been so +forbearing. This lady’s conception of the point of honour placed her +there in a finer and purer light than had at all originally promised to +shine about her. + +She meanwhile herself could well judge how heavy her father found the +burden of Godfrey’s folly and how he was incommoded at having to pay the +horrible woman six hundred a year. Doubtless he was having dreadful +letters from her; doubtless she threatened them all with hideous +exposure. If the matter should be bruited Godfrey’s prospects would +collapse on the spot. He thought Madrid very charming and curious, but +Mrs. Godfrey was in England, so that his father had to face the music. +Adela took a dolorous comfort in her mother’s being out of that—it would +have killed her; but this didn’t blind her to the fact that the comfort +for her father would perhaps have been greater if he had had some one to +talk to about his trouble. He never dreamed of doing so to her, and she +felt she couldn’t ask him. In the family life he wanted utter silence +about it. Early in the winter he went abroad for ten weeks, leaving her +with her sisters in the country, where it was not to be denied that at +this time existence had very little savour. She half expected her +sister-in-law would again descend on her; but the fear wasn’t justified, +and the quietude of the awful creature seemed really to vibrate with the +ring of gold-pieces. There were sure to be extras. Adela winced at the +extras. Colonel Chart went to Paris and to Monte Carlo and then to +Madrid to see his boy. His daughter had the vision of his perhaps +meeting Mrs. Churchley somewhere, since, if she had gone for a year, she +would still be on the Continent. If he should meet her perhaps the +affair would come on again: she caught herself musing over this. But he +brought back no such appearance, and, seeing him after an interval, she +was struck afresh with his jilted and wasted air. She didn’t like it—she +resented it. A little more and she would have said that that was no way +to treat so faithful a man. + +They all went up to town in March, and on one of the first days of April +she saw Mrs. Churchley in the Park. She herself remained apparently +invisible to that lady—she herself and Beatrice and Muriel, who sat with +her in their mother’s old bottle-green landau. Mrs. Churchley, perched +higher than ever, rode by without a recognition; but this didn’t prevent +Adela’s going to her before the month was over. As on her great previous +occasion she went in the morning, and she again had the good fortune to +be admitted. This time, however, her visit was shorter, and a week after +making it—the week was a desolation—she addressed to her brother at +Madrid a letter containing these words: “I could endure it no longer—I +confessed and retracted; I explained to her as well as I could the +falsity of what I said to her ten months ago and the benighted purity of +my motives for saying it. I besought her to regard it as unsaid, to +forgive me, not to despise me too much, to take pity on poor _perfect_ +papa and come back to him. She was more good-natured than you might have +expected—indeed she laughed extravagantly. She had never believed me—it +was too absurd; she had only, at the time, disliked me. She found me +utterly false—she was very frank with me about this—and she told papa she +really thought me horrid. She said she could never live with such a +girl, and as I would certainly never marry I must be sent away—in short +she quite loathed me. Papa defended me, he refused to sacrifice me, and +this led practically to their rupture. Papa gave her up, as it were, for +_me_. Fancy the angel, and fancy what I must try to be to him for the +rest of his life! Mrs. Churchley can never come back—she’s going to +marry Lord Dovedale.” + + + + +***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MARRIAGES*** + + +******* This file should be named 2436-0.txt or 2436-0.zip ******* + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/4/3/2436 + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will +be renamed. + +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part +of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm +concept and trademark. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of +the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at +www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have +to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. + + + + +Title: The Marriages + + +Author: Henry James + + + +Release Date: February 1, 2015 [eBook #2436] +[This file was first posted on February 23, 2000] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII) + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MARRIAGES*** +</pre> +<p>Transcribed from the 1922 Macmillan and Co. “Daisy +Miller, Pandora, The Patagonia and Other Tales” edition by +David Price, email ccx074@pglaf.org. Proofing by Elizabeth +Manzelli and Vanessa Mosher.</p> +<p style="text-align: center"> +<a href="images/coverb.jpg"> +<img alt= +"Book cover" +title= +"Book cover" + src="images/covers.jpg" /> +</a></p> +<h1>THE MARRIAGES<br /> +by Henry James</h1> +<h2>I</h2> +<p>“<span class="smcap">Won’t</span> you stay a +little longer?” the hostess asked while she held the +girl’s hand and smiled. “It’s too early +for every one to go—it’s too absurd.” +Mrs. Churchley inclined her head to one side and looked gracious; +she flourished about her face, in a vaguely protecting sheltering +way, an enormous fan of red feathers. Everything in her +composition, for Adela Chart, was enormous. She had big +eyes, big teeth, big shoulders, big hands, big rings and +bracelets, big jewels of every sort and many of them. The +train of her crimson dress was longer than any other; her house +was huge; her drawing-room, especially now that the company had +left it, looked vast, and it offered to the girl’s eyes a +collection of the largest sofas and chairs, pictures, mirrors, +clocks, that she had ever beheld. Was Mrs. +Churchley’s fortune also large, to account for so many +immensities? Of this Adela could know nothing, but it +struck her, while she smiled sweetly back at their entertainer, +that she had better try to find out. Mrs. Churchley had at +least a high-hung carriage drawn by the tallest horses, and in +the Row she was to be seen perched on a mighty hunter. She +was high and extensive herself, though not exactly fat; her bones +were big, her limbs were long, and her loud hurrying voice +resembled the bell of a steamboat. While she spoke to his +daughter she had the air of hiding from Colonel Chart, a little +shyly, behind the wide ostrich fan. But Colonel Chart was +not a man to be either ignored or eluded.</p> +<p>“Of course every one’s going on to something +else,” he said. “I believe there are a lot of +things to-night.”</p> +<p>“And where are <i>you</i> going?” Mrs. Churchley +asked, dropping her fan and turning her bright hard eyes on the +Colonel.</p> +<p>“Oh I don’t do that sort of thing!”—he +used a tone of familiar resentment that fell with a certain +effect on his daughter’s ear. She saw in it that he +thought Mrs. Churchley might have done him a little more +justice. But what made the honest soul suppose her a person +to look to for a perception of fine shades? Indeed the +shade was one it might have been a little difficult to +seize—the difference between “going on” and +coming to a dinner of twenty people. The pair were in +mourning; the second year had maintained it for Adela, but the +Colonel hadn’t objected to dining with Mrs. Churchley, any +more than he had objected at Easter to going down to the +Millwards’, where he had met her and where the girl had her +reasons for believing him to have known he should meet her. +Adela wasn’t clear about the occasion of their original +meeting, to which a certain mystery attached. In Mrs. +Churchley’s exclamation now there was the fullest +concurrence in Colonel Chart’s idea; she didn’t say +“Ah yes, dear friend, I understand!” but this was the +note of sympathy she plainly wished to sound. It +immediately made Adela say to her “Surely you must be going +on somewhere yourself.”</p> +<p>“Yes, you must have a lot of places,” the Colonel +concurred, while his view of her shining raiment had an invidious +directness. Adela could read the tacit implication: +“You’re not in sorrow, in desolation.”</p> +<p>Mrs. Churchley turned away from her at this and just waited +before answering. The red fan was up again, and this time +it sheltered her from Adela. “I’ll give +everything up—for <i>you</i>,” were the words that +issued from behind it. “<i>Do</i> stay a +little. I always think this is such a nice hour. One +can really talk,” Mrs. Churchley went on. The Colonel +laughed; he said it wasn’t fair. But their hostess +pressed his daughter. “Do sit down; it’s the +only time to have any talk.” The girl saw her father +sit down, but she wandered away, turning her back and pretending +to look at a picture. She was so far from agreeing with +Mrs. Churchley that it was an hour she particularly +disliked. She was conscious of the queerness, the shyness, +in London, of the gregarious flight of guests after a dinner, the +general <i>sauve qui peut</i> and panic fear of being left with +the host and hostess. But personally she always felt the +contagion, always conformed to the rush. Besides, she knew +herself turn red now, flushed with a conviction that had come +over her and that she wished not to show.</p> +<p>Her father sat down on one of the big sofas with Mrs. +Churchley; fortunately he was also a person with a presence that +could hold its own. Adela didn’t care to sit and +watch them while they made love, as she crudely imaged it, and +she cared still less to join in their strange commerce. She +wandered further away, went into another of the bright +“handsome,” rather nude rooms—they were like +women dressed for a ball—where the displaced chairs, at +awkward angles to each other, seemed to retain the attitudes of +bored talkers. Her heart beat as she had seldom known it, +but she continued to make a pretence of looking at the pictures +on the walls and the ornaments on the tables, while she hoped +that, as she preferred it, it would be also the course her father +would like best. She hoped “awfully,” as she +would have said, that he wouldn’t think her rude. She +was a person of courage, and he was a kind, an intensely +good-natured man; nevertheless she went in some fear of +him. At home it had always been a religion with them to be +nice to the people he liked. How, in the old days, her +mother, her incomparable mother, so clever, so unerring, so +perfect, how in the precious days her mother had practised that +art! Oh her mother, her irrecoverable mother! One of +the pictures she was looking at swam before her eyes. Mrs. +Churchley, in the natural course, would have begun immediately to +climb staircases. Adela could see the high bony shoulders +and the long crimson tail and the universal coruscating nod +wriggle their horribly practical way through the rest of the +night. Therefore she <i>must</i> have had her reasons for +detaining them. There were mothers who thought every one +wanted to marry their eldest son, and the girl sought to be clear +as to whether she herself belonged to the class of daughters who +thought every one wanted to marry their father. Her +companions left her alone; and though she didn’t want to be +near them it angered her that Mrs. Churchley didn’t call +her. That proved she was conscious of the situation. +She would have called her, only Colonel Chart had perhaps +dreadfully murmured “Don’t, love, +don’t.” This proved he also was +conscious. The time was really not long—ten minutes +at the most elapsed—when he cried out gaily, pleasantly, as +if with a small jocular reproach, “I say, Adela, we must +release this dear lady!” He spoke of course as if it +had been Adela’s fault that they lingered. When they +took leave she gave Mrs. Churchley, without intention and without +defiance, but from the simple sincerity of her pain, a longer +look into the eyes than she had ever given her before. Mrs. +Churchley’s onyx pupils reflected the question as distant +dark windows reflect the sunset; they seemed to say: “Yes, +I <i>am</i>, if that’s what you want to know!”</p> +<p>What made the case worse, what made the girl more sure, was +the silence preserved by her companion in the brougham on their +way home. They rolled along in the June darkness from +Prince’s Gate to Seymour Street, each looking out of a +window in conscious prudence; watching but not seeing the hurry +of the London night, the flash of lamps, the quick roll on the +wood of hansoms and other broughams. Adela had expected her +father would say something about Mrs. Churchley; but when he said +nothing it affected her, very oddly, still more as if he had +spoken. In Seymour Street he asked the footman if Mr. +Godfrey had come in, to which the servant replied that he had +come in early and gone straight to his room. Adela had +gathered as much, without saying so, from a lighted window on the +second floor; but she contributed no remark to the +question. At the foot of the stairs her father halted as if +he had something on his mind; but what it amounted to seemed only +the dry “Good-night” with which he presently +ascended. It was the first time since her mother’s +death that he had bidden her good-night without kissing +her. They were a kissing family, and after that dire event +the habit had taken a fresh spring. She had left behind her +such a general passion of regret that in kissing each other they +felt themselves a little to be kissing her. Now, as, +standing in the hall, with the stiff watching footman—she +could have said to him angrily “Go +away!”—planted near her, she looked with unspeakable +pain at her father’s back while he mounted, the effect was +of his having withheld from another and a still more slighted +cheek the touch of his lips.</p> +<p>He was going to his room, and after a moment she heard his +door close. Then she said to the servant “Shut up the +house”—she tried to do everything her mother had +done, to be a little of what she had been, conscious only of +falling woefully short—and took her own way upstairs. +After she had reached her room she waited, listening, shaken by +the apprehension that she should hear her father come out again +and go up to Godfrey. He would go up to tell him, to have +it over without delay, precisely because it would be so +difficult. She asked herself indeed why he should tell +Godfrey when he hadn’t taken the occasion—their drive +home being an occasion—to tell herself. However, she +wanted no announcing, no telling; there was such a horrible +clearness in her mind that what she now waited for was only to be +sure her father wouldn’t proceed as she had imagined. +At the end of the minutes she saw this particular danger was +over, upon which she came out and made her own way to her +brother. Exactly what she wanted to say to him first, if +their parent counted on the boy’s greater indulgence, and +before he could say anything, was: “Don’t forgive +him; don’t, don’t!”</p> +<p>He was to go up for an examination, poor lad, and during these +weeks his lamp burned till the small hours. It was for the +Foreign Office, and there was to be some frightful number of +competitors; but Adela had great hopes of him—she believed +so in his talents and saw with pity how hard he worked. +This would have made her spare him, not trouble his night, his +scanty rest, if anything less dreadful had been at stake. +It was a blessing however that one could count on his coolness, +young as he was—his bright good-looking discretion, the +thing that already made him half a man of the world. +Moreover he was the one who would care most. If Basil was +the eldest son—he had as a matter of course gone into the +army and was in India, on the staff, by good luck, of a +governor-general—it was exactly this that would make him +comparatively indifferent. His life was elsewhere, and his +father and he had been in a measure military comrades, so that he +would be deterred by a certain delicacy from protesting; he +wouldn’t have liked any such protest in an affair of +<i>his</i>. Beatrice and Muriel would care, but they were +too young to speak, and this was just why her own responsibility +was so great.</p> +<p>Godfrey was in working-gear—shirt and trousers and +slippers and a beautiful silk jacket. His room felt hot, +though a window was open to the summer night; the lamp on the +table shed its studious light over a formidable heap of +text-books and papers, the bed moreover showing how he had flung +himself down to think out a problem. As soon as she got in +she began. “Father’s going to marry Mrs. +Churchley, you know.”</p> +<p>She saw his poor pink face turn pale. “How do you +know?”</p> +<p>“I’ve seen with my eyes. We’ve been +dining there—we’ve just come home. He’s +in love with her. She’s in love with +<i>him</i>. They’ll arrange it.”</p> +<p>“Oh I say!” Godfrey exclaimed, incredulous.</p> +<p>“He will, he will, he will!” cried the girl; and +with it she burst into tears.</p> +<p>Godfrey, who had a cigarette in his hand, lighted it at one of +the candles on the mantelpiece as if he were embarrassed. +As Adela, who had dropped into his armchair, continued to sob, he +said after a moment: “He oughtn’t to—he +oughtn’t to.”</p> +<p>“Oh think of mamma—think of mamma!” she +wailed almost louder than was safe.</p> +<p>“Yes, he ought to think of mamma.” With +which Godfrey looked at the tip of his cigarette.</p> +<p>“To such a woman as that—after +<i>her</i>!”</p> +<p>“Dear old mamma!” said Godfrey while he +smoked.</p> +<p>Adela rose again, drying her eyes. “It’s +like an insult to her; it’s as if he denied +her.” Now that she spoke of it she felt herself rise +to a height. “He rubs out at a stroke all the years +of their happiness.”</p> +<p>“They were awfully happy,” Godfrey agreed.</p> +<p>“Think what she was—think how no one else will +ever again be like her!” the girl went on.</p> +<p>“I suppose he’s not very happy now,” her +brother vaguely contributed.</p> +<p>“Of course he isn’t, any more than you and I are; +and it’s dreadful of him to want to be.”</p> +<p>“Well, don’t make yourself miserable till +you’re sure,” the young man said.</p> +<p>But Adela showed him confidently that she <i>was</i> sure, +from the way the pair had behaved together and from her +father’s attitude on the drive home. If Godfrey had +been there he would have seen everything; it couldn’t be +explained, but he would have felt. When he asked at what +moment the girl had first had her suspicion she replied that it +had all come at once, that evening; or that at least she had had +no conscious fear till then. There had been signs for two +or three weeks, but she hadn’t understood them—ever +since the day Mrs. Churchley had dined in Seymour Street. +Adela had on that occasion thought it odd her father should have +wished to invite her, given the quiet way they were living; she +was a person they knew so little. He had said something +about her having been very civil to him, and that evening, +already, she had guessed that he must have frequented their +portentous guest herself more than there had been signs of. +To-night it had come to her clearly that he would have called on +her every day since the time of her dining with them; every +afternoon about the hour he was ostensibly at his club. +Mrs. Churchley <i>was</i> his club—she was for all the +world just like one. At this Godfrey laughed; he wanted to +know what his sister knew about clubs. She was slightly +disappointed in his laugh, even wounded by it, but she knew +perfectly what she meant: she meant that Mrs. Churchley was +public and florid, promiscuous and mannish.</p> +<p>“Oh I daresay she’s all right,” he said as +if he wanted to get on with his work. He looked at the +clock on the mantel-shelf; he would have to put in another +hour.</p> +<p>“All right to come and take darling mamma’s +place—to sit where <i>she</i> used to sit, to lay her +horrible hands on <i>her</i> things?” Adela was +appalled—all the more that she hadn’t expected +it—at her brother’s apparent acceptance of such a +prospect.</p> +<p>He coloured; there was something in her passionate piety that +scorched him. She glared at him with tragic eyes—he +might have profaned an altar. “Oh I mean that nothing +will come of it.”</p> +<p>“Not if we do our duty,” said Adela. And +then as he looked as if he hadn’t an idea of what that +could be: “You must speak to him—tell him how we +feel; that we shall never forgive him, that we can’t endure +it.”</p> +<p>“He’ll think I’m cheeky,” her brother +returned, looking down at his papers with his back to her and his +hands in his pockets.</p> +<p>“Cheeky to plead for <i>her</i> memory?”</p> +<p>“He’ll say it’s none of my +business.”</p> +<p>“Then you believe he’ll do it?” cried the +girl.</p> +<p>“Not a bit. Go to bed!”</p> +<p>“<i>I’ll</i> speak to him”—she had +turned as pale as a young priestess.</p> +<p>“Don’t cry out till you’re hurt; wait till +he speaks to <i>you</i>.”</p> +<p>“He won’t, he won’t!” she +declared. “He’ll do it without telling +us.”</p> +<p>Her brother had faced round to her again; he started a little +at this, and again, at one of the candles, lighted his cigarette, +which had gone out. She looked at him a moment; then he +said something that surprised her. “Is Mrs. Churchley +very rich?”</p> +<p>“I haven’t the least idea. What on earth has +that to do with it?”</p> +<p>Godfrey puffed his cigarette. “Does she live as if +she were?”</p> +<p>“She has a lot of hideous showy things.”</p> +<p>“Well, we must keep our eyes open,” he +concluded. “And now you <i>must</i> let me get +on.” He kissed his visitor as if to make up for +dismissing her, or for his failure to take fire; and she held him +a moment, burying her head on his shoulder.</p> +<p>A wave of emotion surged through her, and again she quavered +out: “Ah why did she leave us? Why did she leave +us?”</p> +<p>“Yes, why indeed?” the young man sighed, +disengaging himself with a movement of oppression.</p> +<h2>II</h2> +<p><span class="smcap">Adela</span> was so far right as that by +the end of the week, though she remained certain, her father had +still not made the announcement she dreaded. What convinced +her was the sense of her changed relations with him—of +there being between them something unexpressed, something she was +aware of as she would have been of an open wound. When she +spoke of this to Godfrey he said the change was of her own +making—also that she was cruelly unjust to the +governor. She suffered even more from her brother’s +unexpected perversity; she had had so different a theory about +him that her disappointment was almost an humiliation and she +needed all her fortitude to pitch her faith lower. She +wondered what had happened to him and why he so failed her. +She would have trusted him to feel right about anything, above +all about such a question. Their worship of their +mother’s memory, their recognition of her sacred place in +their past, her exquisite influence in their father’s life, +his fortune, his career, in the whole history of the family and +welfare of the house—accomplished clever gentle good +beautiful and capable as she had been, a woman whose quiet +distinction was universally admired, so that on her death one of +the Princesses, the most august of her friends, had written Adela +such a note about her as princesses were understood very seldom +to write: their hushed tenderness over all this was like a +religion, and was also an attributive honour, to fall away from +which was a form of treachery. This wasn’t the way +people usually felt in London, she knew; but strenuous ardent +observant girl as she was, with secrecies of sentiment and dim +originalities of attitude, she had already made up her mind that +London was no treasure-house of delicacies. Remembrance +there was hammered thin—to be faithful was to make society +gape. The patient dead were sacrificed; they had no +shrines, for people were literally ashamed of mourning. +When they had hustled all sensibility out of their lives they +invented the fiction that they felt too much to utter. +Adela said nothing to her sisters; this reticence was part of the +virtue it was her idea to practise for them. <i>She</i> was +to be their mother, a direct deputy and representative. +Before the vision of that other woman parading in such a +character she felt capable of ingenuities, of deep +diplomacies. The essence of these indeed was just +tremulously to watch her father. Five days after they had +dined together at Mrs. Churchley’s he asked her if she had +been to see that lady.</p> +<p>“No indeed, why should I?” Adela knew that he knew +she hadn’t been, since Mrs. Churchley would have told +him.</p> +<p>“Don’t you call on people after you dine with +them?” said Colonel Chart.</p> +<p>“Yes, in the course of time. I don’t rush +off within the week.”</p> +<p>Her father looked at her, and his eyes were colder than she +had ever seen them, which was probably, she reflected, just the +way hers appeared to himself. “Then you’ll +please rush off to-morrow. She’s to dine with us on +the 12th, and I shall expect your sisters to come +down.”</p> +<p>Adela stared. “To a dinner-party?”</p> +<p>“It’s not to be a dinner-party. I want them +to know Mrs. Churchley.”</p> +<p>“Is there to be nobody else?”</p> +<p>“Godfrey of course. A family party,” he said +with an assurance before which she turned cold.</p> +<p>The girl asked her brother that evening if <i>that</i> +wasn’t tantamount to an announcement. He looked at +her queerly and then said: “<i>I’ve</i> been to see +her.”</p> +<p>“What on earth did you do that for?”</p> +<p>“Father told me he wished it.”</p> +<p>“Then he <i>has</i> told you?”</p> +<p>“Told me what?” Godfrey asked while her heart sank +with the sense of his making difficulties for her.</p> +<p>“That they’re engaged, of course. What else +can all this mean?”</p> +<p>“He didn’t tell me that, but I like +her.”</p> +<p>“<i>Like</i> her!” the girl shrieked.</p> +<p>“She’s very kind, very good.”</p> +<p>“To thrust herself upon us when we hate her? Is +that what you call kind? Is that what you call +decent?”</p> +<p>“Oh <i>I</i> don’t hate her”—and he +turned away as if she bored him.</p> +<p>She called the next day on Mrs. Churchley, designing to break +out somehow, to plead, to appeal—“Oh spare us! have +mercy on us! let him alone! go away!” But that +wasn’t easy when they were face to face. Mrs. +Churchley had every intention of getting, as she would have +said—she was perpetually using the expression—into +touch; but her good intentions were as depressing as a +tailor’s misfits. She could never understand that +they had no place for her vulgar charity, that their life was +filled with a fragrance of perfection for which she had no sense +fine enough. She was as undomestic as a shop-front and as +out of tune as a parrot. She would either make them live in +the streets or bring the streets into their life—it was the +same thing. She had evidently never read a book, and she +used intonations that Adela had never heard, as if she had been +an Australian or an American. She understood everything in +a vulgar sense; speaking of Godfrey’s visit to her and +praising him according to her idea, saying horrid things about +him—that he was awfully good-looking, a perfect gentleman, +the kind she liked. How could her father, who was after all +in everything else such a dear, listen to a woman, or endure her, +who thought she pleased him when she called the son of his dead +wife a perfect gentleman? What would he have been, +pray? Much she knew about what any of them were! When she +told Adela she wanted her to like her the girl thought for an +instant her opportunity had come—the chance to plead with +her and beg her off. But she presented such an impenetrable +surface that it would have been like giving a message to a +varnished door. She wasn’t a woman, said Adela; she +was an address.</p> +<p>When she dined in Seymour Street the “children,” +as the girl called the others, including Godfrey, liked +her. Beatrice and Muriel stared shyly and silently at the +wonders of her apparel (she was brutally over-dressed) without of +course guessing the danger that tainted the air. They +supposed her in their innocence to be amusing, and they +didn’t know, any more than she did herself, how she +patronised them. When she was upstairs with them after +dinner Adela could see her look round the room at the things she +meant to alter—their mother’s things, not a bit like +her own and not good enough for her. After a quarter of an +hour of this our young lady felt sure she was deciding that +Seymour Street wouldn’t do at all, the dear old home that +had done for their mother those twenty years. Was she +plotting to transport them all to her horrible Prince’s +Gate? Of one thing at any rate Adela was certain: her +father, at that moment alone in the dining-room with Godfrey, +pretending to drink another glass of wine to make time, was +coming to the point, was telling the news. When they +reappeared they both, to her eyes, looked unnatural: the news had +been told.</p> +<p>She had it from Godfrey before Mrs. Churchley left the house, +when, after a brief interval, he followed her out of the +drawing-room on her taking her sisters to bed. She was +waiting for him at the door of her room. Her father was +then alone with his <i>fiancée</i>—the word was +grotesque to Adela; it was already as if the place were her +home.</p> +<p>“What did you say to him?” our young woman asked +when her brother had told her.</p> +<p>“I said nothing.” Then he added, +colouring—the expression of her face was +such—“There was nothing to say.”</p> +<p>“Is that how it strikes you?”—and she stared +at the lamp.</p> +<p>“He asked me to speak to her,” Godfrey went +on.</p> +<p>“In what hideous sense?”</p> +<p>“To tell her I was glad.”</p> +<p>“And did you?” Adela panted.</p> +<p>“I don’t know. I said something. She +kissed me.”</p> +<p>“Oh how <i>could</i> you?” shuddered the girl, who +covered her face with her hands.</p> +<p>“He says she’s very rich,” her brother +returned.</p> +<p>“Is that why you kissed her?”</p> +<p>“I didn’t kiss her. Good-night.” +And the young man, turning his back, went out.</p> +<p>When he had gone Adela locked herself in as with the fear she +should be overtaken or invaded, and during a sleepless feverish +memorable night she took counsel of her uncompromising +spirit. She saw things as they were, in all the indignity +of life. The levity, the mockery, the infidelity, the +ugliness, lay as plain as a map before her; it was a world of +gross practical jokes, a world <i>pour rire</i>; but she cried +about it all the same. The morning dawned early, or rather +it seemed to her there had been no night, nothing but a sickly +creeping day. But by the time she heard the house stirring +again she had determined what to do. When she came down to +the breakfast-room her father was already in his place with +newspapers and letters; and she expected the first words he would +utter to be a rebuke to her for having disappeared the night +before without taking leave of Mrs. Churchley. Then she saw +he wished to be intensely kind, to make every allowance, to +conciliate and console her. He knew she had heard from +Godfrey, and he got up and kissed her. He told her as +quickly as possible, to have it over, stammering a little, with +an “I’ve a piece of news for you that will probably +shock you,” yet looking even exaggeratedly grave and rather +pompous, to inspire the respect he didn’t deserve. +When he kissed her she melted, she burst into tears. He +held her against him, kissing her again and again, saying +tenderly “Yes, yes, I know, I know.” But he +didn’t know else he couldn’t have done it. +Beatrice and Muriel came in, frightened when they saw her crying, +and still more scared when she turned to them with words and an +air that were terrible in their comfortable little lives: +“Papa’s going to be married; he’s going to +marry Mrs. Churchley!” After staring a moment and +seeing their father look as strange, on his side, as Adela, +though in a different way, the children also began to cry, so +that when the servants arrived with tea and boiled eggs these +functionaries were greatly embarrassed with their burden, not +knowing whether to come in or hang back. They all scraped +together a decorum, and as soon as the things had been put on +table the Colonel banished the men with a glance. Then he +made a little affectionate speech to Beatrice and Muriel, in +which he described Mrs. Churchley as the kindest, the most +delightful of women, only wanting to make them happy, only +wanting to make <i>him</i> happy, and convinced that he would be +if they were and that they would be if he was.</p> +<p>“What do such words mean?” Adela asked +herself. She declared privately that they meant nothing, +but she was silent, and every one was silent, on account of the +advent of Miss Flynn the governess, before whom Colonel Chart +preferred not to discuss the situation. Adela recognised on +the spot that if things were to go as he wished his children +would practically never again be alone with him. He would +spend all his time with Mrs. Churchley till they were married, +and then Mrs. Churchley would spend all her time with him. +Adela was ashamed of him, and that was horrible—all the +more that every one else would be, all his other friends, every +one who had known her mother. But the public dishonour to +that high memory shouldn’t be enacted; he shouldn’t +do as he wished.</p> +<p>After breakfast her father remarked to her that it would give +him pleasure if in a day or two she would take her sisters to see +their friend, and she replied that he should be obeyed. He +held her hand a moment, looking at her with an argument in his +eyes which presently hardened into sternness. He wanted to +know that she forgave him, but also wanted to assure her that he +expected her to mind what she did, to go straight. She +turned away her eyes; she was indeed ashamed of him.</p> +<p>She waited three days and then conveyed her sisters to the +<i>repaire</i>, as she would have been ready to term it, of the +lioness. That queen of beasts was surrounded with callers, +as Adela knew she would be; it was her “day” and the +occasion the girl preferred. Before this she had spent all +her time with her companions, talking to them about their mother, +playing on their memory of her, making them cry and making them +laugh, reminding them of blest hours of their early childhood, +telling them anecdotes of her own. None the less she +confided to them that she believed there was no harm at all in +Mrs. Churchley, and that when the time should come she would +probably take them out immensely. She saw with smothered +irritation that they enjoyed their visit at Prince’s Gate; +they had never been at anything so “grown-up,” nor +seen so many smart bonnets and brilliant complexions. +Moreover they were considered with interest, quite as if, being +minor elements, yet perceptible ones, of Mrs. Churchley’s +new life, they had been described in advance and were the +heroines of the occasion. There were so many ladies present +that this personage didn’t talk to them much; she only +called them her “chicks” and asked them to hand about +tea-cups and bread and butter. All of which was highly +agreeable and indeed intensely exciting to Beatrice and Muriel, +who had little round red spots in <i>their</i> cheeks when they +came away. Adela quivered with the sense that her +mother’s children were now Mrs. Churchley’s +“chicks” and a part of the furniture of Mrs. +Churchley’s dreadful consciousness.</p> +<p>It was one thing to have made up her mind, however; it was +another thing to make her attempt. It was when she learned +from Godfrey that the day was fixed, the 20th of July, only six +weeks removed, that she felt the importance of prompt +action. She learned everything from Godfrey now, having +decided it would be hypocrisy to question her father. Even +her silence was hypocritical, but she couldn’t weep and +wail. Her father showed extreme tact; taking no notice of +her detachment, treating it as a moment of <i>bouderie</i> he was +bound to allow her and that would pout itself away. She +debated much as to whether she should take Godfrey into her +confidence; she would have done so without hesitation if he +hadn’t disappointed her. He was so little what she +might have expected, and so perversely preoccupied that she could +explain it only by the high pressure at which he was living, his +anxiety about his “exam.” He was in a fidget, +in a fever, putting on a spurt to come in first; sceptical +moreover about his success and cynical about everything +else. He appeared to agree to the general axiom that they +didn’t want a strange woman thrust into their life, but he +found Mrs. Churchley “very jolly as a person to +know.” He had been to see her by himself—he had +been to see her three times. He in fact gave it out that he +would make the most of her now; he should probably be so little +in Seymour Street after these days. What Adela at last +determined to give him was her assurance that the marriage would +never take place. When he asked what she meant and who was +to prevent it she replied that the interesting couple would +abandon the idea of themselves, or that Mrs. Churchley at least +would after a week or two back out of it.</p> +<p>“That will be really horrid then,” Godfrey +pronounced. “The only respectable thing, at the point +they’ve come to, is to put it through. Charming for +poor Dad to have the air of being +‘chucked’!”</p> +<p>This made her hesitate two days more, but she found answers +more valid than any objections. The many-voiced answer to +everything—it was like the autumn wind round the +house—was the affront that fell back on her mother. +Her mother was dead but it killed her again. So one morning +at eleven o’clock, when she knew her father was writing +letters, she went out quietly and, stopping the first hansom she +met, drove to Prince’s Gate. Mrs. Churchley was at +home, and she was shown into the drawing-room with the request +that she would wait five minutes. She waited without the +sense of breaking down at the last, and the impulse to run away, +which were what she had expected to have. In the cab and at +the door her heart had beat terribly, but now suddenly, with the +game really to play, she found herself lucid and calm. It +was a joy to her to feel later that this was the way Mrs. +Churchley found her: not confused, not stammering nor +prevaricating, only a little amazed at her own courage, conscious +of the immense responsibility of her step and wonderfully older +than her years. Her hostess sounded her at first with +suspicious eyes, but eventually, to Adela’s surprise, burst +into tears. At this the girl herself cried, and with the +secret happiness of believing they were saved. Mrs. +Churchley said she would think over what she had been told, and +she promised her young friend, freely enough and very firmly, not +to betray the secret of the latter’s step to the +Colonel. They were saved—they were saved: the words +sung themselves in the girl’s soul as she came +downstairs. When the door opened for her she saw her +brother on the step, and they looked at each other in surprise, +each finding it on the part of the other an odd hour for +Prince’s Gate. Godfrey remarked that Mrs. Churchley +would have enough of the family, and Adela answered that she +would perhaps have too much. None the less the young man +went in while his sister took her way home.</p> +<h2>III</h2> +<p><span class="smcap">She</span> saw nothing of him for nearly a +week; he had more and more his own times and hours, adjusted to +his tremendous responsibilities, and he spent whole days at his +crammer’s. When she knocked at his door late in the +evening he was regularly not in his room. It was known in +the house how much he was worried; he was horribly nervous about +his ordeal. It was to begin on the 23rd of June, and his +father was as worried as himself. The wedding had been +arranged in relation to this; they wished poor Godfrey’s +fate settled first, though they felt the nuptials would be +darkened if it shouldn’t be settled right.</p> +<p>Ten days after that performance of her private undertaking +Adela began to sniff, as it were, a difference in the general +air; but as yet she was afraid to exult. It wasn’t in +truth a difference for the better, so that there might be still a +great tension. Her father, since the announcement of his +intended marriage, had been visibly pleased with himself, but +that pleasure now appeared to have undergone a check. She +had the impression known to the passengers on a great steamer +when, in the middle of the night, they feel the engines +stop. As this impression may easily sharpen to the sense +that something serious has happened, so the girl asked herself +what had actually occurred. She had expected something +serious; but it was as if she couldn’t keep still in her +cabin—she wanted to go up and see. On the 20th, just +before breakfast, her maid brought her a message from her +brother. Mr. Godfrey would be obliged if she would speak to +him in his room. She went straight up to him, dreading to +find him ill, broken down on the eve of his formidable +week. This was not the case however—he rather seemed +already at work, to have been at work since dawn. But he +was very white and his eyes had a strange and new +expression. Her beautiful young brother looked older; he +looked haggard and hard. He met her there as if he had been +waiting for her, and he said at once: “Please tell me this, +Adela—what was the purpose of your visit the other morning +to Mrs. Churchley, the day I met you at her door?”</p> +<p>She stared—she cast about. “The +purpose? What’s the matter? Why do you +ask?”</p> +<p>“They’ve put it off—they’ve put it off +a month.”</p> +<p>“Ah thank God!” said Adela.</p> +<p>“Why the devil do you thank God?” Godfrey asked +with a strange impatience.</p> +<p>She gave a strained intense smile. “You know I +think it all wrong.”</p> +<p>He stood looking at her up and down. “What did you +do there? How did you interfere?”</p> +<p>“Who told you I interfered?” she returned with a +deep flush.</p> +<p>“You said something—you did something. I +knew you had done it when I saw you come out.”</p> +<p>“What I did was my own business.”</p> +<p>“Damn your own business!” cried the young man.</p> +<p>She had never in her life been so spoken to, and in advance, +had she been given the choice, would have said that she’d +rather die than be so handled by Godfrey. But her spirit +was high, and for a moment she was as angry as if she had been +cut with a whip. She escaped the blow but felt the +insult. “And <i>your</i> business then?” she +asked. “I wondered what that was when I saw +<i>you</i>.”</p> +<p>He stood a moment longer scowling at her; then with the +exclamation “You’ve made a pretty mess!” he +turned away from her and sat down to his books.</p> +<p>They had put it off, as he said; her father was dry and stiff +and official about it. “I suppose I had better let +you know we’ve thought it best to postpone our marriage +till the end of the summer—Mrs. Churchley has so many +arrangements to make”: he was not more expansive than +that. She neither knew nor greatly cared whether she but +vainly imagined or correctly observed him to watch her obliquely +for some measure of her receipt of these words. She +flattered herself that, thanks to Godfrey’s forewarning, +cruel as the form of it had been, she was able to repress any +crude sign of elation. She had a perfectly good conscience, +for she could now judge what odious elements Mrs. Churchley, whom +she had not seen since the morning in Prince’s Gate, had +already introduced into their dealings. She gathered +without difficulty that her father hadn’t concurred in the +postponement, for he was more restless than before, more absent +and distinctly irritable. There was naturally still the +question of how much of this condition was to be attributed to +his solicitude about Godfrey. That young man took occasion +to say a horrible thing to his sister: “If I don’t +pass it will be your fault.” These were dreadful days +for the girl, and she asked herself how she could have borne them +if the hovering spirit of her mother hadn’t been at her +side. Fortunately she always felt it there, sustaining, +commending, sanctifying. Suddenly her father announced to +her that he wished her to go immediately, with her sisters, down +to Brinton, where there was always part of a household and where +for a few weeks they would manage well enough. The only +explanation he gave of this desire was that he wanted them out of +the way. “Out of the way of what?” she queried, +since there were to be for the time no preparations in Seymour +Street. She was willing to take it for out of the way of +his nerves.</p> +<p>She never needed urging however to go to Brinton, the dearest +old house in the world, where the happiest days of her young life +had been spent and the silent nearness of her mother always +seemed greatest. She was happy again, with Beatrice and +Muriel and Miss Flynn, with the air of summer and the haunted +rooms and her mother’s garden and the talking oaks and the +nightingales. She wrote briefly to her father, giving him, +as he had requested, an account of things; and he wrote back that +since she was so contented—she didn’t recognise +having told him that—she had better not return to town at +all. The fag-end of the London season would be unimportant +to her, and he was getting on very well. He mentioned that +Godfrey had passed his tests, but, as she knew, there would be a +tiresome wait before news of results. The poor chap was +going abroad for a month with young Sherard—he had earned a +little rest and a little fun. He went abroad without a word +to Adela, but in his beautiful little hand he took a chaffing +leave of Beatrice. The child showed her sister the letter, +of which she was very proud and which contained no message for +any one else. This was the worst bitterness of the whole +crisis for that somebody—its placing in so strange a light +the creature in the world whom, after her mother, she had loved +best.</p> +<p>Colonel Chart had said he would “run down” while +his children were at Brinton, but they heard no more about +it. He only wrote two or three times to Miss Flynn on +matters in regard to which Adela was surprised he shouldn’t +have communicated with herself. Muriel accomplished an +upright little letter to Mrs. Churchley—her eldest sister +neither fostered nor discouraged the performance—to which +Mrs. Churchley replied, after a fortnight, in a meagre and, as +Adela thought, illiterate fashion, making no allusion to the +approach of any closer tie. Evidently the situation had +changed; the question of the marriage was dropped, at any rate +for the time. This idea gave our young woman a singular and +almost intoxicating sense of power; she felt as if she were +riding a great wave of confidence. She had decided and +acted—the greatest could do no more than that. The +grand thing was to see one’s results, and what else was she +doing? These results were in big rich conspicuous lives; +the stage was large on which she moved her figures. Such a +vision was exciting, and as they had the use of a couple of +ponies at Brinton she worked off her excitement by a long +gallop. A day or two after this however came news of which +the effect was to rekindle it. Godfrey had come back, the +list had been published, he had passed first. These happy +tidings proceeded from the young man himself; he announced them +by a telegram to Beatrice, who had never in her life before +received such a missive and was proportionately inflated. +Adela reflected that she herself ought to have felt snubbed, but +she was too happy. They were free again, they were +themselves, the nightmare of the previous weeks was blown away, +the unity and dignity of her father’s life restored, and, +to round off her sense of success, Godfrey had achieved his first +step toward high distinction. She wrote him the next day as +frankly and affectionately as if there had been no estrangement +between them, and besides telling him how she rejoiced in his +triumph begged him in charity to let them know exactly how the +case stood with regard to Mrs. Churchley.</p> +<p>Late in the summer afternoon she walked through the park to +the village with her letter, posted it and came back. +Suddenly, at one of the turns of the avenue, half-way to the +house, she saw a young man hover there as if awaiting her—a +young man who proved to be Godfrey on his pedestrian progress +over from the station. He had seen her as he took his short +cut, and if he had come down to Brinton it wasn’t +apparently to avoid her. There was nevertheless none of the +joy of his triumph in his face as he came a very few steps to +meet her; and although, stiffly enough, he let her kiss him and +say “I’m so glad—I’m so glad!” she +felt this tolerance as not quite the mere calm of the rising +diplomatist. He turned toward the house with her and walked +on a short distance while she uttered the hope that he had come +to stay some days.</p> +<p>“Only till to-morrow morning. They’re +sending me straight to Madrid. I came down to say good-bye; +there’s a fellow bringing my bags.”</p> +<p>“To Madrid? How awfully nice! And it’s +awfully nice of you to have come,” she said as she passed +her hand into his arm.</p> +<p>The movement made him stop, and, stopping, he turned on her in +a flash a face of something more than, suspicion—of +passionate reprobation. “What I really came +for—you might as well know without more delay—is to +ask you a question.”</p> +<p>“A question?”—she echoed it with a beating +heart.</p> +<p>They stood there under the old trees in the lingering light, +and, young and fine and fair as they both were, formed a complete +superficial harmony with the peaceful English scene. A near +view, however, would have shown that Godfrey Chart hadn’t +taken so much trouble only to skim the surface. He looked +deep into his sister’s eyes. “What was it you +said that morning to Mrs. Churchley?”</p> +<p>She fixed them on the ground a moment, but at last met his own +again. “If she has told you, why do you +ask?”</p> +<p>“She has told me nothing. I’ve seen for +myself.”</p> +<p>“What have you seen?”</p> +<p>“She has broken it off. Everything’s +over. Father’s in the depths.”</p> +<p>“In the depths?” the girl quavered.</p> +<p>“Did you think it would make him jolly?” he went +on.</p> +<p>She had to choose what to say. “He’ll get +over it. He’ll he glad.”</p> +<p>“That remains to be seen. You interfered, you +invented something, you got round her. I insist on knowing +what you did.”</p> +<p>Adela felt that if it was a question of obstinacy there was +something within her she could count on; in spite of which, while +she stood looking down again a moment, she said to herself +“I could be dumb and dogged if I chose, but I scorn to +be.” She wasn’t ashamed of what she had done, +but she wanted to be clear. “Are you absolutely +certain it’s broken off?”</p> +<p>“He is, and she is; so that’s as good.”</p> +<p>“What reason has she given?”</p> +<p>“None at all—or half a dozen; it’s the same +thing. She has changed her mind—she mistook her +feelings—she can’t part with her independence. +Moreover he has too many children.”</p> +<p>“Did he tell you this?” the girl asked.</p> +<p>“Mrs. Churchley told me. She has gone abroad for a +year.”</p> +<p>“And she didn’t tell you what I said to +her?”</p> +<p>Godfrey showed an impatience. “Why should I take +this trouble if she had?”</p> +<p>“You might have taken it to make me suffer,” said +Adela. “That appears to be what you want to +do.”</p> +<p>“No, I leave that to you—it’s the good turn +you’ve done me!” cried the young man with hot tears +in his eyes.</p> +<p>She stared, aghast with the perception that there was some +dreadful thing she didn’t know; but he walked on, dropping +the question angrily and turning his back to her as if he +couldn’t trust himself. She read his disgust in his +averted, face, in the way he squared his shoulders and smote the +ground with his stick, and she hurried after him and presently +overtook him. She kept by him for a moment in silence; then +she broke out: “What do you mean? What in the world +have I done to you?”</p> +<p>“She would have helped me. She was all ready to +help me,” Godfrey portentously said.</p> +<p>“Helped you in what?” She wondered what he +meant; if he had made debts that he was afraid to confess to his +father and—of all horrible things—had been looking to +Mrs. Churchley to pay. She turned red with the mere +apprehension of this and, on the heels of her guess, exulted +again at having perhaps averted such a shame.</p> +<p>“Can’t you just see I’m in trouble? +Where are your eyes, your senses, your sympathy, that you talk so +much about? Haven’t you seen these six months that +I’ve a curst worry in my life?”</p> +<p>She seized his arm, made him stop, stood looking up at him +like a frightened little girl. “What’s the +matter, Godfrey?—what <i>is</i> the matter?”</p> +<p>“You’ve gone against me so—I could strangle +you!” he growled. This image added nothing to her +dread; her dread was that he had done some wrong, was stained +with some guilt. She uttered it to him with clasped hands, +begging him to tell her the worst; but, still more passionately, +he cut her short with his own cry: “In God’s name, +satisfy me! What infernal thing did you do?”</p> +<p>“It wasn’t infernal—it was right. I +told her mamma had been wretched,” said Adela.</p> +<p>“Wretched? You told her such a lie?”</p> +<p>“It was the only way, and she believed me.”</p> +<p>“Wretched how?—wretched when?—wretched +where?” the young man stammered.</p> +<p>“I told her papa had made her so, and that <i>she</i> +ought to know it. I told her the question troubled me +unspeakably, but that I had made up my mind it was my duty to +initiate her.” Adela paused, the light of bravado in +her face, as if, though struck while the words came with the +monstrosity of what she had done, she was incapable of abating a +jot of it. “I notified her that he had faults and +peculiarities that made mamma’s life a long worry—a +martyrdom that she hid wonderfully from the world, but that we +saw and that I had often pitied. I told her what they were, +these faults and peculiarities; I put the dots on the +i’s. I said it wasn’t fair to let another +person marry him without a warning. I warned her; I +satisfied my conscience. She could do as she liked. +My responsibility was over.”</p> +<p>Godfrey gazed at her; he listened with parted lips, +incredulous and appalled. “You invented such a tissue +of falsities and calumnies, and you talk about your +conscience? You stand there in your senses and proclaim +your crime?”</p> +<p>“I’d have committed any crime that would have +rescued us.”</p> +<p>“You insult and blacken and ruin your own father?” +Godfrey kept on.</p> +<p>“He’ll never know it; she took a vow she +wouldn’t tell him.”</p> +<p>“Ah I’ll he damned if <i>I</i> won’t tell +him!” he rang out.</p> +<p>Adela felt sick at this, but she flamed up to resent the +treachery, as it struck her, of such a menace. “I did +right—I did right!” she vehemently declared “I +went down on my knees to pray for guidance, and I saved +mamma’s memory from outrage. But if I hadn’t, +if I hadn’t”—she faltered an +instant—“I’m not worse than you, and I’m +not so bad, for you’ve done something that you’re +ashamed to tell me.”</p> +<p>He had taken out his watch; he looked at it with quick +intensity, as if not hearing nor heeding her. Then, his +calculating eyes raised, he fixed her long enough to exclaim with +unsurpassable horror and contempt: “You raving +maniac!” He turned away from her; he bounded down the +avenue in the direction from which they had come, and, while she +watched him, strode away, across the grass, toward the short cut +to the station.</p> +<h2>IV</h2> +<p><span class="smcap">His</span> bags, by the time she got home, +had been brought to the house, but Beatrice and Muriel, +immediately informed of this, waited for their brother in +vain. Their sister said nothing to them of her having seen +him, and she accepted after a little, with a calmness that +surprised herself, the idea that he had returned to town to +denounce her. She believed this would make no difference +now—she had done what she had done. She had somehow a +stiff faith in Mrs. Churchley. Once that so considerable +mass had received its impetus it wouldn’t, it +couldn’t pull up. It represented a heavy-footed +person, incapable of further agility. Adela recognised too +how well it might have come over her that there were too many +children. Lastly the girl fortified herself with the +reflexion, grotesque in the conditions and conducing to prove her +sense of humour not high, that her father was after all not a man +to be played with. It seemed to her at any rate that if she +<i>had</i> baffled his unholy purpose she could bear +anything—bear imprisonment and bread and water, bear lashes +and torture, bear even his lifelong reproach. What she +could bear least was the wonder of the inconvenience she had +inflicted on Godfrey. She had time to turn this over, very +vainly, for a succession of days—days more numerous than +she had expected, which passed without bringing her from London +any summons to come up and take her punishment. She sounded +the possible, she compared the degrees of the probable; feeling +however that as a cloistered girl she was poorly equipped for +speculation. She tried to imagine the calamitous things +young men might do, and could only feel that such things would +naturally be connected either with borrowed money or with bad +women. She became conscious that after all she knew almost +nothing about either of those interests. The worst woman +she knew was Mrs. Churchley herself. Meanwhile there was no +reverberation from Seymour Street—only a sultry +silence.</p> +<p>At Brinton she spent hours in her mother’s garden, where +she had grown up, where she considered that she was training for +old age, since she meant not to depend on whist. She loved +the place as, had she been a good Catholic, she would have loved +the smell of her parish church; and indeed there was in her +passion for flowers something of the respect of a religion. +They seemed to her the only things in the world that really +respected themselves, unless one made an exception for Nutkins, +who had been in command all through her mother’s time, with +whom she had had a real friendship and who had been affected by +their pure example. He was the person left in the world +with whom on the whole she could speak most intimately of the +dead. They never had to name her together—they only +said “she”; and Nutkins freely conceded that she had +taught him everything he knew. When Beatrice and Muriel +said “she” they referred to Mrs. Churchley. +Adela had reason to believe she should never marry, and that some +day she should have about a thousand a year. This made her +see in the far future a little garden of her own, under a hill, +full of rare and exquisite things, where she would spend most of +her old age on her knees with an apron and stout gloves, with a +pair of shears and a trowel, steeped in the comfort of being +thought mad.</p> +<p>One morning ten days after her scene with Godfrey, on coming +back into the house shortly before lunch, she was met by Miss +Flynn with the notification that a lady in the drawing-room had +been waiting for her for some minutes. “A lady” +suggested immediately Mrs. Churchley. It came over Adela +that the form in which her penalty was to descend would be a +personal explanation with that misdirected woman. The lady +had given no name, and Miss Flynn hadn’t seen Mrs. +Churchley; nevertheless the governess was certain Adela’s +surmise was wrong.</p> +<p>“Is she big and dreadful?” the girl asked.</p> +<p>Miss Flynn, who was circumspection itself, took her +time. “She’s dreadful, but she’s not +big.” She added that she wasn’t sure she ought +to let Adela go in alone; but this young lady took herself +throughout for a heroine, and it wasn’t in a heroine to +shrink from any encounter. Wasn’t she every instant +in transcendent contact with her mother? The visitor might +have no connexion whatever with the drama of her father’s +frustrated marriage; but everything to-day for Adela was part of +that.</p> +<p>Miss Flynn’s description had prepared her for a +considerable shock, but she wasn’t agitated by her first +glimpse of the person who awaited her. A youngish +well-dressed woman stood there, and silence was between them +while they looked at each other. Before either had spoken +however Adela began to see what Miss Flynn had intended. In +the light of the drawing-room window the lady was five-and-thirty +years of age and had vivid yellow hair. She also had a blue +cloth suit with brass buttons, a stick-up collar like a +gentleman’s, a necktie arranged in a sailor’s knot, a +golden pin in the shape of a little lawn-tennis racket, and +pearl-grey gloves with big black stitchings. Adela’s +second impression was that she was an actress, and her third that +no such person had ever before crossed that threshold.</p> +<p>“I’ll tell you what I’ve come for,” +said the apparition. “I’ve come to ask you to +intercede.” She wasn’t an actress; an actress +would have had a nicer voice.</p> +<p>“To intercede?” Adela was too bewildered to +ask her to sit down.</p> +<p>“With your father, you know. He doesn’t +know, but he’ll have to.” Her +“have” sounded like “’ave.” +She explained, with many more such sounds, that she was Mrs. +Godfrey, that they had been married seven mortal months. If +Godfrey was going abroad she must go with him, and the only way +she could go with him would be for his father to do +something. He was afraid of his father—that was +clear; he was afraid even to tell him. What she had come +down for was to see some other member of the family face to +face—“fice to fice,” Mrs. Godfrey called +it—and try if he couldn’t be approached by another +side. If no one else would act then she would just have to +act herself. The Colonel would have to do +something—that was the only way out of it.</p> +<p>What really happened Adela never quite understood; what seemed +to be happening was that the room went round and round. +Through the blur of perception accompanying this effect the sharp +stabs of her visitor’s revelation came to her like the +words heard by a patient “going off” under +ether. She afterwards denied passionately even to herself +that she had done anything so abject as to faint; but there was a +lapse in her consciousness on the score of Miss Flynn’s +intervention. This intervention had evidently been active, +for when they talked the matter over, later in the day, with +bated breath and infinite dissimulation for the school-room +quarter, the governess had more lurid truths, and still more, to +impart than to receive. She was at any rate under the +impression that she had athletically contended, in the +drawing-room, with the yellow hair—this after removing +Adela from the scene and before inducing Mrs. Godfrey to +withdraw. Miss Flynn had never known a more thrilling day, +for all the rest of it too was pervaded with agitations and +conversations, precautions and alarms. It was given out to +Beatrice and Muriel that their sister had been taken suddenly +ill, and the governess ministered to her in her room. +Indeed Adela had never found herself less at ease, for this time +she had received a blow that she couldn’t return. +There was nothing to do but to take it, to endure the humiliation +of her wound.</p> +<p>At first she declined to take it—having, as might +appear, the much more attractive resource of regarding her +visitant as a mere masquerading person, an impudent +impostor. On the face of the matter moreover it +wasn’t fair to believe till one heard; and to hear in such +a case was to hear Godfrey himself. Whatever she had tried +to imagine about him she hadn’t arrived at anything so +belittling as an idiotic secret marriage with a dyed and painted +hag. Adela repeated this last word as if it gave her +comfort; and indeed where everything was so bad fifteen years of +seniority made the case little worse. Miss Flynn was +portentous, for Miss Flynn had had it out with the wretch. +She had cross-questioned her and had not broken her down. +This was the most uplifted hour of Miss Flynn’s life; for +whereas she usually had to content herself with being humbly and +gloomily in the right she could now be magnanimously and showily +so. Her only perplexity was as to what she ought to +do—write to Colonel Chart or go up to town to see +him. She bloomed with alternatives—she resembled some +dull garden-path which under a copious downpour has begun to +flaunt with colour. Toward evening Adela was obliged to +recognise that her brother’s worry, of which he had spoken +to her, had appeared bad enough to consist even of a low wife, +and to remember that, so far from its being inconceivable a young +man in his position should clandestinely take one, she had been +present, years before, during her mother’s lifetime, when +Lady Molesley declared gaily, over a cup of tea, that this was +precisely what she expected of her eldest son. The next +morning it was the worst possibilities that seemed clearest; the +only thing left with a tatter of dusky comfort being the +ambiguity of Godfrey’s charge that her own action had +“done” for him. That was a matter by itself, +and she racked her brains for a connecting link between Mrs. +Churchley and Mrs. Godfrey. At last she made up her mind +that they were related by blood; very likely, though differing in +fortune, they were cousins or even sisters. But even then +what did the wretched boy mean?</p> +<p>Arrested by the unnatural fascination of opportunity, Miss +Flynn received before lunch a telegram from Colonel +Chart—an order for dinner and a vehicle; he and Godfrey +were to arrive at six o’clock. Adela had plenty of +occupation for the interval, since she was pitying her father +when she wasn’t rejoicing that her mother had gone too soon +to know. She flattered herself she made out the +providential reason of that cruelty now. She found time +however still to wonder for what purpose, given the situation, +Godfrey was to be brought down. She wasn’t +unconscious indeed that she had little general knowledge of what +usually was done with young men in that predicament. One +talked about the situation, but the situation was an abyss. +She felt this still more when she found, on her father’s +arrival, that nothing apparently was to happen as she had taken +for granted it would. There was an inviolable hush over the +whole affair, but no tragedy, no publicity, nothing ugly. +The tragedy had been in town—the faces of the two men spoke +of it in spite of their other perfunctory aspects; and at present +there was only a family dinner, with Beatrice and Muriel and the +governess—with almost a company tone too, the result of the +desire to avoid publicity. Adela admired her father; she +knew what he was feeling if Mrs. Godfrey had been at him, and yet +she saw him positively gallant. He was mildly austere, or +rather even—what was it?—august; just as, coldly +equivocal, he never looked at his son, so that at moments he +struck her as almost sick with sadness. Godfrey was equally +inscrutable and therefore wholly different from what he had been +as he stood before her in the park. If he was to start on +his career (with such a wife!—wouldn’t she utterly +blight it?) he was already professional enough to know how to +wear a mask.</p> +<p>Before they rose from table she felt herself wholly +bewildered, so little were such large causes traceable in their +effects. She had nerved herself for a great ordeal, but the +air was as sweet as an anodyne. It was perfectly plain to +her that her father was deadly sore—as pathetic as a person +betrayed. He was broken, but he showed no resentment; there +was a weight on his heart, but he had lightened it by dressing as +immaculately as usual for dinner. She asked herself what +immensity of a row there could have been in town to have left his +anger so spent. He went through everything, even to sitting +with his son after dinner. When they came out together he +invited Beatrice and Muriel to the billiard-room, and as Miss +Flynn discreetly withdrew Adela was left alone with Godfrey, who +was completely changed and not now in the least of a rage. +He was broken too, but not so pathetic as his father. He +was only very correct and apologetic he said to his sister: +“I’m awfully sorry <i>you</i> were annoyed—it +was something I never dreamed of.”</p> +<p>She couldn’t think immediately what he meant; then she +grasped the reference to her extraordinary invader. She was +uncertain, however, what tone to take; perhaps his father had +arranged with him that they were to make the best of it. +But she spoke her own despair in the way she murmured “Oh +Godfrey, Godfrey, is it true?”</p> +<p>“I’ve been the most unutterable donkey—you +can say what you like to me. You can’t say anything +worse than I’ve said to myself.”</p> +<p>“My brother, my brother!”—his words made her +wail it out. He hushed her with a movement and she asked: +“What has father said?”</p> +<p>He looked very high over her head. “He’ll +give her six hundred a year.”</p> +<p>“Ah the angel!”—it was too splendid.</p> +<p>“On condition”—Godfrey scarce +blinked—“she never comes near me. She has +solemnly promised, and she’ll probably leave me alone to +get the money. If she doesn’t—in +diplomacy—I’m lost.” He had been turning +his eyes vaguely about, this way and that, to avoid meeting hers; +but after another instant he gave up the effort and she had the +miserable confession of his glance. “I’ve been +living in hell.”</p> +<p>“My brother, my brother!” she yearningly +repeated.</p> +<p>“I’m not an idiot; yet for her I’ve behaved +like one. Don’t ask me—you mustn’t +know. It was all done in a day, and since then fancy my +condition; fancy my work in such a torment; fancy my coming +through at all.”</p> +<p>“Thank God you passed!” she cried. +“You were wonderful!”</p> +<p>“I’d have shot myself if I hadn’t +been. I had an awful day yesterday with the governor; it +was late at night before it was over. I leave England next +week. He brought me down here for it to look well—so +that the children shan’t know.”</p> +<p>“<i>He’s</i> wonderful too!” Adela +murmured.</p> +<p>“Wonderful too!” Godfrey echoed.</p> +<p>“Did <i>she</i> tell him?” the girl went on.</p> +<p>“She came straight to Seymour Street from here. +She saw him alone first; then he called me in. <i>That</i> +luxury lasted about an hour.”</p> +<p>“Poor, poor father!” Adela moaned at this; on +which her brother remained silent. Then after he had +alluded to it as the scene he had lived in terror of all through +his cramming, and she had sighed forth again her pity and +admiration for such a mixture of anxieties and such a triumph of +talent, she pursued: “Have you told him?”</p> +<p>“Told him what?”</p> +<p>“What you said you would—what <i>I</i> +did.”</p> +<p>Godfrey turned away as if at present he had very little +interest in that inferior tribulation. “I was angry +with you, but I cooled off. I held my tongue.”</p> +<p>She clasped her hands. “You thought of +mamma!”</p> +<p>“Oh don’t speak of mamma!” he cried as in +rueful tenderness.</p> +<p>It was indeed not a happy moment, and she murmured: “No; +if you <i>had</i> thought of her—!”</p> +<p>This made Godfrey face her again with a small flare in his +eyes. “Oh <i>then</i> it didn’t prevent. +I thought that woman really good. I believed in +her.”</p> +<p>“Is she <i>very</i> bad?”</p> +<p>“I shall never mention her to you again,” he +returned with dignity.</p> +<p>“You may believe <i>I</i> won’t speak of +her! So father doesn’t know?” the girl +added.</p> +<p>“Doesn’t know what?”</p> +<p>“That I said what I did to Mrs. Churchley.”</p> +<p>He had a momentary pause. “I don’t think so, +but you must find out for yourself.”</p> +<p>“I shall find out,” said Adela. “But +what had Mrs. Churchley to do with it?”</p> +<p>“With <i>my</i> misery? I told her. I had to +tell some one.”</p> +<p>“Why didn’t you tell me?”</p> +<p>He appeared—though but after an instant—to know +exactly why. “Oh you take things so beastly +hard—you make such rows.” Adela covered her +face with her hands and he went on: “What I wanted was +comfort—not to be lashed up. I thought I should go +mad. I wanted Mrs. Churchley to break it to father, to +intercede for me and help him to meet it. She was awfully +kind to me, she listened and she understood; she could fancy how +it had happened. Without her I shouldn’t have pulled +through. She liked me, you know,” he further +explained, and as if it were quite worth mentioning—all the +more that it was pleasant to him. “She said +she’d do what she could for me. She was full of +sympathy and resource. I really leaned on her. But +when <i>you</i> cut in of course it spoiled everything. +That’s why I was so furious with you. She +couldn’t do anything then.”</p> +<p>Adela dropped her hands, staring; she felt she had walked in +darkness. “So that he had to meet it +alone?”</p> +<p>“<i>Dame</i>!” said Godfrey, who had got up his +French tremendously.</p> +<p>Muriel came to the door to say papa wished the two others to +join them, and the next day Godfrey returned to town. His +father remained at Brinton, without an intermission, the rest of +the summer and the whole of the autumn, and Adela had a chance to +find out, as she had said, whether he knew she had +interfered. But in spite of her chance she never found +out. He knew Mrs. Churchley had thrown him over and he knew +his daughter rejoiced in it, but he appeared not to have divined +the relation between the two facts. It was strange that one +of the matters he was clearest about—Adela’s secret +triumph—should have been just the thing which from this +time on justified less and less such a confidence. She was +too sorry for him to be consistently glad. She watched his +attempts to wind himself up on the subject of shorthorns and +drainage, and she favoured to the utmost of her ability his +intermittent disposition to make a figure in orchids. She +wondered whether they mightn’t have a few people at +Brinton; but when she mentioned the idea he asked what in the +world there would be to attract them. It was a confoundedly +stupid house, he remarked—with all respect to <i>her</i> +cleverness. Beatrice and Muriel were mystified; the +prospect of going out immensely had faded so utterly away. +They were apparently not to go out at all. Colonel Chart +was aimless and bored; he paced up and down and went back to +smoking, which was bad for him, and looked drearily out of +windows as if on the bare chance that something might +arrive. Did he expect Mrs. Churchley to arrive, did he +expect her to relent on finding she couldn’t live without +him? It was Adela’s belief that she gave no +sign. But the girl thought it really remarkable of her not +to have betrayed her ingenious young visitor. Adela’s +judgement of human nature was perhaps harsh, but she believed +that most women, given the various facts, wouldn’t have +been so forbearing. This lady’s conception of the +point of honour placed her there in a finer and purer light than +had at all originally promised to shine about her.</p> +<p>She meanwhile herself could well judge how heavy her father +found the burden of Godfrey’s folly and how he was +incommoded at having to pay the horrible woman six hundred a +year. Doubtless he was having dreadful letters from her; +doubtless she threatened them all with hideous exposure. If +the matter should be bruited Godfrey’s prospects would +collapse on the spot. He thought Madrid very charming and +curious, but Mrs. Godfrey was in England, so that his father had +to face the music. Adela took a dolorous comfort in her +mother’s being out of that—it would have killed her; +but this didn’t blind her to the fact that the comfort for +her father would perhaps have been greater if he had had some one +to talk to about his trouble. He never dreamed of doing so +to her, and she felt she couldn’t ask him. In the +family life he wanted utter silence about it. Early in the +winter he went abroad for ten weeks, leaving her with her sisters +in the country, where it was not to be denied that at this time +existence had very little savour. She half expected her +sister-in-law would again descend on her; but the fear +wasn’t justified, and the quietude of the awful creature +seemed really to vibrate with the ring of gold-pieces. +There were sure to be extras. Adela winced at the +extras. Colonel Chart went to Paris and to Monte Carlo and +then to Madrid to see his boy. His daughter had the vision +of his perhaps meeting Mrs. Churchley somewhere, since, if she +had gone for a year, she would still be on the Continent. +If he should meet her perhaps the affair would come on again: she +caught herself musing over this. But he brought back no +such appearance, and, seeing him after an interval, she was +struck afresh with his jilted and wasted air. She +didn’t like it—she resented it. A little more +and she would have said that that was no way to treat so faithful +a man.</p> +<p>They all went up to town in March, and on one of the first +days of April she saw Mrs. Churchley in the Park. She +herself remained apparently invisible to that lady—she +herself and Beatrice and Muriel, who sat with her in their +mother’s old bottle-green landau. Mrs. Churchley, +perched higher than ever, rode by without a recognition; but this +didn’t prevent Adela’s going to her before the month +was over. As on her great previous occasion she went in the +morning, and she again had the good fortune to be admitted. +This time, however, her visit was shorter, and a week after +making it—the week was a desolation—she addressed to +her brother at Madrid a letter containing these words: “I +could endure it no longer—I confessed and retracted; I +explained to her as well as I could the falsity of what I said to +her ten months ago and the benighted purity of my motives for +saying it. I besought her to regard it as unsaid, to +forgive me, not to despise me too much, to take pity on poor +<i>perfect</i> papa and come back to him. She was more +good-natured than you might have expected—indeed she +laughed extravagantly. She had never believed me—it +was too absurd; she had only, at the time, disliked me. She +found me utterly false—she was very frank with me about +this—and she told papa she really thought me horrid. +She said she could never live with such a girl, and as I would +certainly never marry I must be sent away—in short she +quite loathed me. Papa defended me, he refused to sacrifice +me, and this led practically to their rupture. Papa gave +her up, as it were, for <i>me</i>. Fancy the angel, and +fancy what I must try to be to him for the rest of his +life! Mrs. Churchley can never come back—she’s +going to marry Lord Dovedale.”</p> +<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MARRIAGES***</p> +<pre> + + +***** This file should be named 2436-h.htm or 2436-h.zip****** + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/4/3/2436 + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will +be renamed. + +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part +of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm +concept and trademark. 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Proofed by Elizabeth +Manzelli and Vanessa Mosher. + + + + + +The Marriages + +by Henry James + + + + +CHAPTER I + + + +"Won't you stay a little longer?" the hostess asked while she held +the girl's hand and smiled. "It's too early for every one to go-- +it's too absurd." Mrs. Churchley inclined her head to one side and +looked gracious; she flourished about her face, in a vaguely +protecting sheltering way, an enormous fan of red feathers. +Everything in her composition, for Adela Chart, was enormous. She +had big eyes, big teeth, big shoulders, big hands, big rings and +bracelets, big jewels of every sort and many of them. The train of +her crimson dress was longer than any other; her house was huge; her +drawing-room, especially now that the company had left it, looked +vast, and it offered to the girl's eyes a collection of the largest +sofas and chairs, pictures, mirrors, clocks, that she had ever +beheld. Was Mrs. Churchley's fortune also large, to account for so +many immensities? Of this Adela could know nothing, but it struck +her, while she smiled sweetly back at their entertainer, that she had +better try to find out. Mrs. Churchley had at least a high-hung +carriage drawn by the tallest horses, and in the Row she was to be +seen perched on a mighty hunter. She was high and extensive herself, +though not exactly fat; her bones were big, her limbs were long, and +her loud hurrying voice resembled the bell of a steamboat. While she +spoke to his daughter she had the air of hiding from Colonel Chart, a +little shyly, behind the wide ostrich fan. But Colonel Chart was not +a man to be either ignored or eluded. + +"Of course every one's going on to something else," he said. "I +believe there are a lot of things to-night." + +"And where are YOU going?" Mrs. Churchley asked, dropping her fan and +turning her bright hard eyes on the Colonel. + +"Oh I don't do that sort of thing!"--he used a tone of familiar +resentment that fell with a certain effect on his daughter's ear. +She saw in it that he thought Mrs. Churchley might have done him a +little more justice. But what made the honest soul suppose her a +person to look to for a perception of fine shades? Indeed the shade +was one it might have been a little difficult to seize--the +difference between "going on" and coming to a dinner of twenty +people. The pair were in mourning; the second year had maintained it +for Adela, but the Colonel hadn't objected to dining with Mrs. +Churchley, any more than he had objected at Easter to going down to +the Millwards', where he had met her and where the girl had her +reasons for believing him to have known he should meet her. Adela +wasn't clear about the occasion of their original meeting, to which a +certain mystery attached. In Mrs. Churchley's exclamation now there +was the fullest concurrence in Colonel Chart's idea; she didn't say +"Ah yes, dear friend, I understand!" but this was the note of +sympathy she plainly wished to sound. It immediately made Adela say +to her "Surely you must be going on somewhere yourself." + +"Yes, you must have a lot of places," the Colonel concurred, while +his view of her shining raiment had an invidious directness. Adela +could read the tacit implication: "You're not in sorrow, in +desolation." + +Mrs. Churchley turned away from her at this and just waited before +answering. The red fan was up again, and this time it sheltered her +from Adela. "I'll give everything up--for YOU," were the words that +issued from behind it. "DO stay a little. I always think this is +such a nice hour. One can really talk," Mrs. Churchley went on. The +Colonel laughed; he said it wasn't fair. But their hostess pressed +his daughter. "Do sit down; it's the only time to have any talk." +The girl saw her father sit down, but she wandered away, turning her +back and pretending to look at a picture. She was so far from +agreeing with Mrs. Churchley that it was an hour she particularly +disliked. She was conscious of the queerness, the shyness, in +London, of the gregarious flight of guests after a dinner, the +general sauve qui peut and panic fear of being left with the host and +hostess. But personally she always felt the contagion, always +conformed to the rush. Besides, she knew herself turn red now, +flushed with a conviction that had come over her and that she wished +not to show. + +Her father sat down on one of the big sofas with Mrs. Churchley; +fortunately he was also a person with a presence that could hold its +own. Adela didn't care to sit and watch them while they made love, +as she crudely imaged it, and she cared still less to join in their +strange commerce. She wandered further away, went into another of +the bright "handsome," rather nude rooms--they were like women +dressed for a ball--where the displaced chairs, at awkward angles to +each other, seemed to retain the attitudes of bored talkers. Her +heart beat as she had seldom known it, but she continued to make a +pretence of looking at the pictures on the walls and the ornaments on +the tables, while she hoped that, as she preferred it, it would be +also the course her father would like best. She hoped "awfully," as +she would have said, that he wouldn't think her rude. She was a +person of courage, and he was a kind, an intensely good-natured man; +nevertheless she went in some fear of him. At home it had always +been a religion with them to be nice to the people he liked. How, in +the old days, her mother, her incomparable mother, so clever, so +unerring, so perfect, how in the precious days her mother had +practised that art! Oh her mother, her irrecoverable mother! One of +the pictures she was looking at swam before her eyes. Mrs. +Churchley, in the natural course, would have begun immediately to +climb staircases. Adela could see the high bony shoulders and the +long crimson tail and the universal coruscating nod wriggle their +horribly practical way through the rest of the night. Therefore she +MUST have had her reasons for detaining them. There were mothers who +thought every one wanted to marry their eldest son, and the girl +sought to be clear as to whether she herself belonged to the class of +daughters who thought every one wanted to marry their father. Her +companions left her alone; and though she didn't want to be near them +it angered her that Mrs. Churchley didn't call her. That proved she +was conscious of the situation. She would have called her, only +Colonel Chart had perhaps dreadfully murmured "Don't, love, don't." +This proved he also was conscious. The time was really not long--ten +minutes at the most elapsed--when he cried out gaily, pleasantly, as +if with a small jocular reproach, "I say, Adela, we must release this +dear lady!" He spoke of course as if it had been Adela's fault that +they lingered. When they took leave she gave Mrs. Churchley, without +intention and without defiance, but from the simple sincerity of her +pain, a longer look into the eyes than she had ever given her before. +Mrs. Churchley's onyx pupils reflected the question as distant dark +windows reflect the sunset; they seemed to say: "Yes, I AM, if +that's what you want to know!" + +What made the case worse, what made the girl more sure, was the +silence preserved by her companion in the brougham on their way home. +They rolled along in the June darkness from Prince's Gate to Seymour +Street, each looking out of a window in conscious prudence; watching +but not seeing the hurry of the London night, the flash of lamps, the +quick roll on the wood of hansoms and other broughams. Adela had +expected her father would say something about Mrs. Churchley; but +when he said nothing it affected her, very oddly, still more as if he +had spoken. In Seymour Street he asked the footman if Mr. Godfrey +had come in, to which the servant replied that he had come in early +and gone straight to his room. Adela had gathered as much, without +saying so, from a lighted window on the second floor; but she +contributed no remark to the question. At the foot of the stairs her +father halted as if he had something on his mind; but what it +amounted to seemed only the dry "Good-night" with which he presently +ascended. It was the first time since her mother's death that he had +bidden her good-night without kissing her. They were a kissing +family, and after that dire event the habit had taken a fresh spring. +She had left behind her such a general passion of regret that in +kissing each other they felt themselves a little to be kissing her. +Now, as, standing in the hall, with the stiff watching footman--she +could have said to him angrily "Go away!"--planted near her, she +looked with unspeakable pain at her father's back while he mounted, +the effect was of his having withheld from another and a still more +slighted cheek the touch of his lips. + +He was going to his room, and after a moment she heard his door +close. Then she said to the servant "Shut up the house"--she tried +to do everything her mother had done, to be a little of what she had +been, conscious only of falling woefully short--and took her own way +upstairs. After she had reached her room she waited, listening, +shaken by the apprehension that she should hear her father come out +again and go up to Godfrey. He would go up to tell him, to have it +over without delay, precisely because it would be so difficult. She +asked herself indeed why he should tell Godfrey when he hadn't taken +the occasion--their drive home being an occasion--to tell herself. +However, she wanted no announcing, no telling; there was such a +horrible clearness in her mind that what she now waited for was only +to be sure her father wouldn't proceed as she had imagined. At the +end of the minutes she saw this particular danger was over, upon +which she came out and made her own way to her brother. Exactly what +she wanted to say to him first, if their parent counted on the boy's +greater indulgence, and before he could say anything, was: "Don't +forgive him; don't, don't!" + +He was to go up for an examination, poor lad, and during these weeks +his lamp burned till the small hours. It was for the Foreign Office, +and there was to be some frightful number of competitors; but Adela +had great hopes of him--she believed so in his talents and saw with +pity how hard he worked. This would have made her spare him, not +trouble his night, his scanty rest, if anything less dreadful had +been at stake. It was a blessing however that one could count on his +coolness, young as he was--his bright good-looking discretion, the +thing that already made him half a man of the world. Moreover he was +the one who would care most. If Basil was the eldest son--he had as +a matter of course gone into the army and was in India, on the staff, +by good luck, of a governor-general--it was exactly this that would +make him comparatively indifferent. His life was elsewhere, and his +father and he had been in a measure military comrades, so that he +would be deterred by a certain delicacy from protesting; he wouldn't +have liked any such protest in an affair of HIS. Beatrice and Muriel +would care, but they were too young to speak, and this was just why +her own responsibility was so great. + +Godfrey was in working-gear--shirt and trousers and slippers and a +beautiful silk jacket. His room felt hot, though a window was open +to the summer night; the lamp on the table shed its studious light +over a formidable heap of text-books and papers, the bed moreover +showing how he had flung himself down to think out a problem. As +soon as she got in she began. "Father's going to marry Mrs. +Churchley, you know." + +She saw his poor pink face turn pale. "How do you know?" + +"I've seen with my eyes. We've been dining there--we've just come +home. He's in love with her. She's in love with HIM. They'll +arrange it." + +"Oh I say!" Godfrey exclaimed, incredulous. + +"He will, he will, he will!" cried the girl; and with it she burst +into tears. + +Godfrey, who had a cigarette in his hand, lighted it at one of the +candles on the mantelpiece as if he were embarrassed. As Adela, who +had dropped into his armchair, continued to sob, he said after a +moment: "He oughtn't to--he oughtn't to." + +"Oh think of mamma--think of mamma!" she wailed almost louder than +was safe. + +"Yes, he ought to think of mamma." With which Godfrey looked at the +tip of his cigarette. + +"To such a woman as that--after HER!" + +"Dear old mamma!" said Godfrey while he smoked. + +Adela rose again, drying her eyes. "It's like an insult to her; it's +as if he denied her." Now that she spoke of it she felt herself rise +to a height. "He rubs out at a stroke all the years of their +happiness." + +"They were awfully happy," Godfrey agreed. + +"Think what she was--think how no one else will ever again be like +her!" the girl went on. + +"I suppose he's not very happy now," her brother vaguely contributed. + +"Of course he isn't, any more than you and I are; and it's dreadful +of him to want to be." + +"Well, don't make yourself miserable till you're sure," the young man +said. + +But Adela showed him confidently that she WAS sure, from the way the +pair had behaved together and from her father's attitude on the drive +home. If Godfrey had been there he would have seen everything; it +couldn't be explained, but he would have felt. When he asked at what +moment the girl had first had her suspicion she replied that it had +all come at once, that evening; or that at least she had had no +conscious fear till then. There had been signs for two or three +weeks, but she hadn't understood them--ever since the day Mrs. +Churchley had dined in Seymour Street. Adela had on that occasion +thought it odd her father should have wished to invite her, given the +quiet way they were living; she was a person they knew so little. He +had said something about her having been very civil to him, and that +evening, already, she had guessed that he must have frequented their +portentous guest herself more than there had been signs of. To-night +it had come to her clearly that he would have called on her every day +since the time of her dining with them; every afternoon about the +hour he was ostensibly at his club. Mrs. Churchley WAS his club--she +was for all the world just like one. At this Godfrey laughed; he +wanted to know what his sister knew about clubs. She was slightly +disappointed in his laugh, even wounded by it, but she knew perfectly +what she meant: she meant that Mrs. Churchley was public and florid, +promiscuous and mannish. + +"Oh I daresay she's all right," he said as if he wanted to get on +with his work. He looked at the clock on the mantel-shelf; he would +have to put in another hour. + +"All right to come and take darling mamma's place--to sit where SHE +used to sit, to lay her horrible hands on HER things?" Adela was +appalled--all the more that she hadn't expected it--at her brother's +apparent acceptance of such a prospect. + +He coloured; there was something in her passionate piety that +scorched him. She glared at him with tragic eyes--he might have +profaned an altar. "Oh I mean that nothing will come of it." + +"Not if we do our duty," said Adela. And then as he looked as if he +hadn't an idea of what that could be: "You must speak to him--tell +him how we feel; that we shall never forgive him, that we can't +endure it." + +"He'll think I'm cheeky," her brother returned, looking down at his +papers with his back to her and his hands in his pockets. + +"Cheeky to plead for HER memory?" + +"He'll say it's none of my business." + +"Then you believe he'll do it?" cried the girl. + +"Not a bit. Go to bed!" + +"I'LL speak to him"--she had turned as pale as a young priestess. + +"Don't cry out till you're hurt; wait till he speaks to YOU." + +"He won't, he won't!" she declared. "He'll do it without telling +us." + +Her brother had faced round to her again; he started a little at +this, and again, at one of the candles, lighted his cigarette, which +had gone out. She looked at him a moment; then he said something +that surprised her. "Is Mrs. Churchley very rich?" + +"I haven't the least idea. What on earth has that to do with it?" + +Godfrey puffed his cigarette. "Does she live as if she were?" + +"She has a lot of hideous showy things." + +"Well, we must keep our eyes open," he concluded. "And now you must +let me get on." He kissed his visitor as if to make up for +dismissing her, or for his failure to take fire; and she held him a +moment, burying her head on his shoulder. + +A wave of emotion surged through her, and again she quavered out: +"Ah why did she leave us? Why did she leave us?" + +"Yes, why indeed?" the young man sighed, disengaging himself with a +movement of oppression. + + + +CHAPTER II + + + +Adela was so far right as that by the end of the week, though she +remained certain, her father had still not made the announcement she +dreaded. What convinced her was the sense of her changed relations +with him--of there being between them something unexpressed, +something she was aware of as she would have been of an open wound. +When she spoke of this to Godfrey he said the change was of her own +making--also that she was cruelly unjust to the governor. She +suffered even more from her brother's unexpected perversity; she had +had so different a theory about him that her disappointment was +almost an humiliation and she needed all her fortitude to pitch her +faith lower. She wondered what had happened to him and why he so +failed her. She would have trusted him to feel right about anything, +above all about such a question. Their worship of their mother's +memory, their recognition of her sacred place in their past, her +exquisite influence in their father's life, his fortune, his career, +in the whole history of the family and welfare of the house-- +accomplished clever gentle good beautiful and capable as she had +been, a woman whose quiet distinction was universally admired, so +that on her death one of the Princesses, the most august of her +friends, had written Adela such a note about her as princesses were +understood very seldom to write: their hushed tenderness over all +this was like a religion, and was also an attributive honour, to fall +away from which was a form of treachery. This wasn't the way people +usually felt in London, she knew; but strenuous ardent observant girl +as she was, with secrecies of sentiment and dim originalities of +attitude, she had already made up her mind that London was no +treasure-house of delicacies. Remembrance there was hammered thin-- +to be faithful was to make society gape. The patient dead were +sacrificed; they had no shrines, for people were literally ashamed of +mourning. When they had hustled all sensibility out of their lives +they invented the fiction that they felt too much to utter. Adela +said nothing to her sisters; this reticence was part of the virtue it +was her idea to practise for them. SHE was to be their mother, a +direct deputy and representative. Before the vision of that other +woman parading in such a character she felt capable of ingenuities, +of deep diplomacies. The essence of these indeed was just +tremulously to watch her father. Five days after they had dined +together at Mrs. Churchley's he asked her if she had been to see that +lady. + +"No indeed, why should I?" Adela knew that he knew she hadn't been, +since Mrs. Churchley would have told him. + +"Don't you call on people after you dine with them?" said Colonel +Chart. + +"Yes, in the course of time. I don't rush off within the week." + +Her father looked at her, and his eyes were colder than she had ever +seen them, which was probably, she reflected, just the way hers +appeared to himself. "Then you'll please rush off to-morrow. She's +to dine with us on the 12th, and I shall expect your sisters to come +down." + +Adela stared. "To a dinner-party?" + +"It's not to be a dinner-party. I want them to know Mrs. Churchley." + +"Is there to be nobody else?" + +"Godfrey of course. A family party," he said with an assurance +before which she turned cold. + +The girl asked her brother that evening if THAT wasn't tantamount to +an announcement. He looked at her queerly and then said: "I'VE been +to see her." + +"What on earth did you do that for?" + +"Father told me he wished it." + +"Then he HAS told you?" + +"Told me what?" Godfrey asked while her heart sank with the sense of +his making difficulties for her. + +"That they're engaged, of course. What else can all this mean?" + +"He didn't tell me that, but I like her." + +"LIKE her!" the girl shrieked. + +"She's very kind, very good." + +"To thrust herself upon us when we hate her? Is that what you call +kind? Is that what you call decent?" + +"Oh _I_ don't hate her"--and he turned away as if she bored him. + +She called the next day on Mrs. Churchley, designing to break out +somehow, to plead, to appeal--"Oh spare us! have mercy on us! let him +alone! go away!" But that wasn't easy when they were face to face. +Mrs. Churchley had every intention of getting, as she would have +said--she was perpetually using the expression--into touch; but her +good intentions were as depressing as a tailor's misfits. She could +never understand that they had no place for her vulgar charity, that +their life was filled with a fragrance of perfection for which she +had no sense fine enough. She was as undomestic as a shop-front and +as out of tune as a parrot. She would either make them live in the +streets or bring the streets into their life--it was the same thing. +She had evidently never read a book, and she used intonations that +Adela had never heard, as if she had been an Australian or an +American. She understood everything in a vulgar sense; speaking of +Godfrey's visit to her and praising him according to her idea, saying +horrid things about him--that he was awfully good-looking, a perfect +gentleman, the kind she liked. How could her father, who was after +all in everything else such a dear, listen to a woman, or endure her, +who thought she pleased him when she called the son of his dead wife +a perfect gentleman? What would he have been, pray? Much she knew +about what any of them were! When she told Adela she wanted her to +like her the girl thought for an instant her opportunity had come-- +the chance to plead with her and beg her off. But she presented such +an impenetrable surface that it would have been like giving a message +to a varnished door. She wasn't a woman, said Adela; she was an +address. + +When she dined in Seymour Street the "children," as the girl called +the others, including Godfrey, liked her. Beatrice and Muriel stared +shyly and silently at the wonders of her apparel (she was brutally +over-dressed) without of course guessing the danger that tainted the +air. They supposed her in their innocence to be amusing, and they +didn't know, any more than she did herself, how she patronised them. +When she was upstairs with them after dinner Adela could see her look +round the room at the things she meant to alter--their mother's +things, not a bit like her own and not good enough for her. After a +quarter of an hour of this our young lady felt sure she was deciding +that Seymour Street wouldn't do at all, the dear old home that had +done for their mother those twenty years. Was she plotting to +transport them all to her horrible Prince's Gate? Of one thing at +any rate Adela was certain: her father, at that moment alone in the +dining-room with Godfrey, pretending to drink another glass of wine +to make time, was coming to the point, was telling the news. When +they reappeared they both, to her eyes, looked unnatural: the news +had been told. + +She had it from Godfrey before Mrs. Churchley left the house, when, +after a brief interval, he followed her out of the drawing-room on +her taking her sisters to bed. She was waiting for him at the door +of her room. Her father was then alone with his fiancee--the word +was grotesque to Adela; it was already as if the place were her home. + +"What did you say to him?" our young woman asked when her brother had +told her. + +"I said nothing." Then he added, colouring--the expression of her +face was such--"There was nothing to say." + +"Is that how it strikes you?"--and she stared at the lamp. + +"He asked me to speak to her," Godfrey went on. + +"In what hideous sense?" + +"To tell her I was glad." + +"And did you?" Adela panted. + +"I don't know. I said something. She kissed me." + +"Oh how COULD you?" shuddered the girl, who covered her face with her +hands. + +"He says she's very rich," her brother returned. + +"Is that why you kissed her?" + +"I didn't kiss her. Good-night." And the young man, turning his +back, went out. + +When he had gone Adela locked herself in as with the fear she should +be overtaken or invaded, and during a sleepless feverish memorable +night she took counsel of her uncompromising spirit. She saw things +as they were, in all the indignity of life. The levity, the mockery, +the infidelity, the ugliness, lay as plain as a map before her; it +was a world of gross practical jokes, a world pour rire; but she +cried about it all the same. The morning dawned early, or rather it +seemed to her there had been no night, nothing but a sickly creeping +day. But by the time she heard the house stirring again she had +determined what to do. When she came down to the breakfast-room her +father was already in his place with newspapers and letters; and she +expected the first words he would utter to be a rebuke to her for +having disappeared the night before without taking leave of Mrs. +Churchley. Then she saw he wished to be intensely kind, to make +every allowance, to conciliate and console her. He knew she had +heard from Godfrey, and he got up and kissed her. He told her as +quickly as possible, to have it over, stammering a little, with an +"I've a piece of news for you that will probably shock you," yet +looking even exaggeratedly grave and rather pompous, to inspire the +respect he didn't deserve. When he kissed her she melted, she burst +into tears. He held her against him, kissing her again and again, +saying tenderly "Yes, yes, I know, I know." But he didn't know else +he couldn't have done it. Beatrice and Muriel came in, frightened +when they saw her crying, and still more scared when she turned to +them with words and an air that were terrible in their comfortable +little lives: "Papa's going to be married; he's going to marry Mrs. +Churchley!" After staring a moment and seeing their father look as +strange, on his side, as Adela, though in a different way, the +children also began to cry, so that when the servants arrived with +tea and boiled eggs these functionaries were greatly embarrassed with +their burden, not knowing whether to come in or hang back. They all +scraped together a decorum, and as soon as the things had been put on +table the Colonel banished the men with a glance. Then he made a +little affectionate speech to Beatrice and Muriel, in which he +described Mrs. Churchley as the kindest, the most delightful of +women, only wanting to make them happy, only wanting to make HIM +happy, and convinced that he would be if they were and that they +would be if he was. + +"What do such words mean?" Adela asked herself. She declared +privately that they meant nothing, but she was silent, and every one +was silent, on account of the advent of Miss Flynn the governess, +before whom Colonel Chart preferred not to discuss the situation. +Adela recognised on the spot that if things were to go as he wished +his children would practically never again be alone with him. He +would spend all his time with Mrs. Churchley till they were married, +and then Mrs. Churchley would spend all her time with him. Adela was +ashamed of him, and that was horrible--all the more that every one +else would be, all his other friends, every one who had known her +mother. But the public dishonour to that high memory shouldn't be +enacted; he shouldn't do as he wished. + +After breakfast her father remarked to her that it would give him +pleasure if in a day or two she would take her sisters to see their +friend, and she replied that he should be obeyed. He held her hand a +moment, looking at her with an argument in his eyes which presently +hardened into sternness. He wanted to know that she forgave him, but +also wanted to assure her that he expected her to mind what she did, +to go straight. She turned away her eyes; she was indeed ashamed of +him. + +She waited three days and then conveyed her sisters to the repaire, +as she would have been ready to term it, of the lioness. That queen +of beasts was surrounded with callers, as Adela knew she would be; it +was her "day" and the occasion the girl preferred. Before this she +had spent all her time with her companions, talking to them about +their mother, playing on their memory of her, making them cry and +making them laugh, reminding them of blest hours of their early +childhood, telling them anecdotes of her own. None the less she +confided to them that she believed there was no harm at all in Mrs. +Churchley, and that when the time should come she would probably take +them out immensely. She saw with smothered irritation that they +enjoyed their visit at Prince's Gate; they had never been at anything +so "grown-up," nor seen so many smart bonnets and brilliant +complexions. Moreover they were considered with interest, quite as +if, being minor elements, yet perceptible ones, of Mrs. Churchley's +new life, they had been described in advance and were the heroines of +the occasion. There were so many ladies present that this personage +didn't talk to them much; she only called them her "chicks" and asked +them to hand about tea-cups and bread and butter. All of which was +highly agreeable and indeed intensely exciting to Beatrice and +Muriel, who had little round red spots in THEIR cheeks when they came +away. Adela quivered with the sense that her mother's children were +now Mrs. Churchley's "chicks" and a part of the furniture of Mrs. +Churchley's dreadful consciousness. + +It was one thing to have made up her mind, however; it was another +thing to make her attempt. It was when she learned from Godfrey that +the day was fixed, the 20th of July, only six weeks removed, that she +felt the importance of prompt action. She learned everything from +Godfrey now, having decided it would be hypocrisy to question her +father. Even her silence was hypocritical, but she couldn't weep and +wail. Her father showed extreme tact; taking no notice of her +detachment, treating it as a moment of bouderie he was bound to allow +her and that would pout itself away. She debated much as to whether +she should take Godfrey into her confidence; she would have done so +without hesitation if he hadn't disappointed her. He was so little +what she might have expected, and so perversely preoccupied that she +could explain it only by the high pressure at which he was living, +his anxiety about his "exam." He was in a fidget, in a fever, +putting on a spurt to come in first; sceptical moreover about his +success and cynical about everything else. He appeared to agree to +the general axiom that they didn't want a strange woman thrust into +their life, but he found Mrs. Churchley "very jolly as a person to +know." He had been to see her by himself--he had been to see her +three times. He in fact gave it out that he would make the most of +her now; he should probably be so little in Seymour Street after +these days. What Adela at last determined to give him was her +assurance that the marriage would never take place. When he asked +what she meant and who was to prevent it she replied that the +interesting couple would abandon the idea of themselves, or that Mrs. +Churchley at least would after a week or two back out of it. + +"That will be really horrid then," Godfrey pronounced. "The only +respectable thing, at the point they've come to, is to put it +through. Charming for poor Dad to have the air of being 'chucked'!" + +This made her hesitate two days more, but she found answers more +valid than any objections. The many-voiced answer to everything--it +was like the autumn wind round the house--was the affront that fell +back on her mother. Her mother was dead but it killed her again. So +one morning at eleven o'clock, when she knew her father was writing +letters, she went out quietly and, stopping the first hansom she met, +drove to Prince's Gate. Mrs. Churchley was at home, and she was +shown into the drawing-room with the request that she would wait five +minutes. She waited without the sense of breaking down at the last, +and the impulse to run away, which were what she had expected to +have. In the cab and at the door her heart had beat terribly, but +now suddenly, with the game really to play, she found herself lucid +and calm. It was a joy to her to feel later that this was the way +Mrs. Churchley found her: not confused, not stammering nor +prevaricating, only a little amazed at her own courage, conscious of +the immense responsibility of her step and wonderfully older than her +years. Her hostess sounded her at first with suspicious eyes, but +eventually, to Adela's surprise, burst into tears. At this the girl +herself cried, and with the secret happiness of believing they were +saved. Mrs. Churchley said she would think over what she had been +told, and she promised her young friend, freely enough and very +firmly, not to betray the secret of the latter's step to the Colonel. +They were saved--they were saved: the words sung themselves in the +girl's soul as she came downstairs. When the door opened for her she +saw her brother on the step, and they looked at each other in +surprise, each finding it on the part of the other an odd hour for +Prince's Gate. Godfrey remarked that Mrs. Churchley would have +enough of the family, and Adela answered that she would perhaps have +too much. None the less the young man went in while his sister took +her way home. + + + +CHAPTER III + + + +She saw nothing of him for nearly a week; he had more and more his +own times and hours, adjusted to his tremendous responsibilities, and +he spent whole days at his crammer's. When she knocked at his door +late in the evening he was regularly not in his room. It was known +in the house how much he was worried; he was horribly nervous about +his ordeal. It was to begin on the 23rd of June, and his father was +as worried as himself. The wedding had been arranged in relation to +this; they wished poor Godfrey's fate settled first, though they felt +the nuptials would be darkened if it shouldn't be settled right. + +Ten days after that performance of her private undertaking Adela +began to sniff, as it were, a difference in the general air; but as +yet she was afraid to exult. It wasn't in truth a difference for the +better, so that there might be still a great tension. Her father, +since the announcement of his intended marriage, had been visibly +pleased with himself, but that pleasure now appeared to have +undergone a check. She had the impression known to the passengers on +a great steamer when, in the middle of the night, they feel the +engines stop. As this impression may easily sharpen to the sense +that something serious has happened, so the girl asked herself what +had actually occurred. She had expected something serious; but it +was as if she couldn't keep still in her cabin--she wanted to go up +and see. On the 20th, just before breakfast, her maid brought her a +message from her brother. Mr. Godfrey would be obliged if she would +speak to him in his room. She went straight up to him, dreading to +find him ill, broken down on the eve of his formidable week. This +was not the case however--he rather seemed already at work, to have +been at work since dawn. But he was very white and his eyes had a +strange and new expression. Her beautiful young brother looked +older; he looked haggard and hard. He met her there as if he had +been waiting for her, and he said at once: "Please tell me this, +Adela--what was the purpose of your visit the other morning to Mrs. +Churchley, the day I met you at her door?" + +She stared--she cast about. "The purpose? What's the matter? Why +do you ask?" + +"They've put it off--they've put it off a month." + +"Ah thank God!" said Adela. + +"Why the devil do you thank God?" Godfrey asked with a strange +impatience. + +She gave a strained intense smile. "You know I think it all wrong." + +He stood looking at her up and down. "What did you do there? How +did you interfere?" + +"Who told you I interfered?" she returned with a deep flush. + +"You said something--you did something. I knew you had done it when +I saw you come out." + +"What I did was my own business." + +"Damn your own business!" cried the young man. + +She had never in her life been so spoken to, and in advance, had she +been given the choice, would have said that she'd rather die than be +so handled by Godfrey. But her spirit was high, and for a moment she +was as angry as if she had been cut with a whip. She escaped the +blow but felt the insult. "And YOUR business then?" she asked. "I +wondered what that was when I saw YOU." + +He stood a moment longer scowling at her; then with the exclamation +"You've made a pretty mess!" he turned away from her and sat down to +his books. + +They had put it off, as he said; her father was dry and stiff and +official about it. "I suppose I had better let you know we've +thought it best to postpone our marriage till the end of the summer-- +Mrs. Churchley has so many arrangements to make": he was not more +expansive than that. She neither knew nor greatly cared whether she +but vainly imagined or correctly observed him to watch her obliquely +for some measure of her receipt of these words. She flattered +herself that, thanks to Godfrey's forewarning, cruel as the form of +it had been, she was able to repress any crude sign of elation. She +had a perfectly good conscience, for she could now judge what odious +elements Mrs. Churchley, whom she had not seen since the morning in +Prince's Gate, had already introduced into their dealings. She +gathered without difficulty that her father hadn't concurred in the +postponement, for he was more restless than before, more absent and +distinctly irritable. There was naturally still the question of how +much of this condition was to be attributed to his solicitude about +Godfrey. That young man took occasion to say a horrible thing to his +sister: "If I don't pass it will be your fault." These were +dreadful days for the girl, and she asked herself how she could have +borne them if the hovering spirit of her mother hadn't been at her +side. Fortunately she always felt it there, sustaining, commending, +sanctifying. Suddenly her father announced to her that he wished her +to go immediately, with her sisters, down to Brinton, where there was +always part of a household and where for a few weeks they would +manage well enough. The only explanation he gave of this desire was +that he wanted them out of the way. Out of the way of what?" she +queried, since there were to be for the time no preparations in +Seymour Street. She was willing to take it for out of the way of his +nerves. + +She never needed urging however to go to Brinton, the dearest old +house in the world, where the happiest days of her young life had +been spent and the silent nearness of her mother always seemed +greatest. She was happy again, with Beatrice and Muriel and Miss +Flynn, with the air of summer and the haunted rooms and her mother's +garden and the talking oaks and the nightingales. She wrote briefly +to her father, giving him, as he had requested, an account of things; +and he wrote back that since she was so contented--she didn't +recognise having told him that--she had better not return to town at +all. The fag-end of the London season would be unimportant to her, +and he was getting on very well. He mentioned that Godfrey had +passed his tests, but, as she knew, there would be a tiresome wait +before news of results. The poor chap was going abroad for a month +with young Sherard--he had earned a little rest and a little fun. He +went abroad without a word to Adela, but in his beautiful little hand +he took a chaffing leave of Beatrice. The child showed her sister +the letter, of which she was very proud and which contained no +message for any one else. This was the worst bitterness of the whole +crisis for that somebody--its placing in so strange a light the +creature in the world whom, after her mother, she had loved best. + +Colonel Chart had said he would "run down" while his children were at +Brinton, but they heard no more about it. He only wrote two or three +times to Miss Flynn on matters in regard to which Adela was surprised +he shouldn't have communicated with herself. Muriel accomplished an +upright little letter to Mrs. Churchley--her eldest sister neither +fostered nor discouraged the performance--to which Mrs. Churchley +replied, after a fortnight, in a meagre and, as Adela thought, +illiterate fashion, making no allusion to the approach of any closer +tie. Evidently the situation had changed; the question of the +marriage was dropped, at any rate for the time. This idea gave our +young woman a singular and almost intoxicating sense of power; she +felt as if she were riding a great wave of confidence. She had +decided and acted--the greatest could do no more than that. The +grand thing was to see one's results, and what else was she doing? +These results were in big rich conspicuous lives; the stage was large +on which she moved her figures. Such a vision was exciting, and as +they had the use of a couple of ponies at Brinton she worked off her +excitement by a long gallop. A day or two after this however came +news of which the effect was to rekindle it. Godfrey had come back, +the list had been published, he had passed first. These happy +tidings proceeded from the young man himself; he announced them by a +telegram to Beatrice, who had never in her life before received such +a missive and was proportionately inflated. Adela reflected that she +herself ought to have felt snubbed, but she was too happy. They were +free again, they were themselves, the nightmare of the previous weeks +was blown away, the unity and dignity of her father's life restored, +and, to round off her sense of success, Godfrey had achieved his +first step toward high distinction. She wrote him the next day as +frankly and affectionately as if there had been no estrangement +between them, and besides telling him how she rejoiced in his triumph +begged him in charity to let them know exactly how the case stood +with regard to Mrs. Churchley. + +Late in the summer afternoon she walked through the park to the +village with her letter, posted it and came back. Suddenly, at one +of the turns of the avenue, half-way to the house, she saw a young +man hover there as if awaiting her--a young man who proved to be +Godfrey on his pedestrian progress over from the station. He had +seen her as he took his short cut, and if he had come down to Brinton +it wasn't apparently to avoid her. There was nevertheless none of +the joy of his triumph in his face as he came a very few steps to +meet her; and although, stiffly enough, he let her kiss him and say +"I'm so glad--I'm so glad!" she felt this tolerance as not quite the +mere calm of the rising diplomatist. He turned toward the house with +her and walked on a short distance while she uttered the hope that he +had come to stay some days. + +"Only till to-morrow morning. They're sending me straight to Madrid. +I came down to say good-bye; there's a fellow bringing my bags." + +"To Madrid? How awfully nice! And it's awfully nice of you to have +come," she said as she passed her hand into his arm. + +The movement made him stop, and, stopping, he turned on her in a +flash a face of something more than, suspicion--of passionate +reprobation. "What I really came for--you might as well know without +more delay--is to ask you a question." + +"A question?"--she echoed it with a beating heart. + +They stood there under the old trees in the lingering light, and, +young and fine and fair as they both were, formed a complete +superficial harmony with the peaceful English scene. A near view, +however, would have shown that Godfrey Chart hadn't taken so much +trouble only to skim the surface. He looked deep into his sister's +eyes. "What was it you said that morning to Mrs. Churchley?" + +She fixed them on the ground a moment, but at last met his own again. +"If she has told you, why do you ask?" + +"She has told me nothing. I've seen for myself." + +"What have you seen?" + +"She has broken it off. Everything's over. Father's in the depths." + +"In the depths?" the girl quavered. + +"Did you think it would make him jolly?" he went on. + +She had to choose what to say. "He'll get over it. He'll he glad." + +"That remains to be seen. You interfered, you invented something, +you got round her. I insist on knowing what you did." + +Adela felt that if it was a question of obstinacy there was something +within her she could count on; in spite of which, while she stood +looking down again a moment, she said to herself "I could be dumb and +dogged if I chose, but I scorn to be." She wasn't ashamed of what +she had done, but she wanted to be clear. "Are you absolutely +certain it's broken off?" + +"He is, and she is; so that's as good." + +"What reason has she given?" + +"None at all--or half a dozen; it's the same thing. She has changed +her mind--she mistook her feelings--she can't part with her +independence. Moreover he has too many children." + +"Did he tell you this?" the girl asked. + +"Mrs. Churchley told me. She has gone abroad for a year." + +"And she didn't tell you what I said to her?" + +Godfrey showed an impatience. "Why should I take this trouble if she +had?" + +"You might have taken it to make me suffer," said Adela. "That +appears to be what you want to do." + +"No, I leave that to you--it's the good turn you've done me!" cried +the young man with hot tears in his eyes. + +She stared, aghast with the perception that there was some dreadful +thing she didn't know; but he walked on, dropping the question +angrily and turning his back to her as if he couldn't trust himself. +She read his disgust in his averted, face, in the way he squared his +shoulders and smote the ground with his stick, and she hurried after +him and presently overtook him. She kept by him for a moment in +silence; then she broke out: "What do you mean? What in the world +have I done to you?" + +"She would have helped me. She was all ready to help me," Godfrey +portentously said. + +"Helped you in what?" She wondered what he meant; if he had made +debts that he was afraid to confess to his father and--of all +horrible things--had been looking to Mrs. Churchley to pay. She +turned red with the mere apprehension of this and, on the heels of +her guess, exulted again at having perhaps averted such a shame. + +"Can't you just see I'm in trouble? Where are your eyes, your +senses, your sympathy, that you talk so much about? Haven't you seen +these six months that I've a curst worry in my life?" + +She seized his arm, made him stop, stood looking up at him like a +frightened little girl. "What's the matter, Godfrey?--what IS the +matter?" + +"You've gone against me so--I could strangle you!" he growled. This +image added nothing to her dread; her dread was that he had done some +wrong, was stained with some guilt. She uttered it to him with +clasped hands, begging him to tell her the worst; but, still more +passionately, he cut her short with his own cry: "In God's name, +satisfy me! What infernal thing did you do?" + +"It wasn't infernal--it was right. I told her mamma had been +wretched," said Adela. + +"Wretched? You told her such a lie?" + +"It was the only way, and she believed me." + +"Wretched how?--wretched when?--wretched where?" the young man +stammered. + +"I told her papa had made her so, and that SHE ought to know it. I +told her the question troubled me unspeakably, but that I had made up +my mind it was my duty to initiate her." Adela paused, the light of +bravado in her face, as if, though struck while the words came with +the monstrosity of what she had done, she was incapable of abating a +jot of it. "I notified her that he had faults and peculiarities that +made mamma's life a long worry--a martyrdom that she hid wonderfully +from the world, but that we saw and that I had often pitied. I told +her what they were, these faults and peculiarities; I put the dots on +the i's. I said it wasn't fair to let another person marry him +without a warning. I warned her; I satisfied my conscience. She +could do as she liked. My responsibility was over." + +Godfrey gazed at her; he listened with parted lips, incredulous and +appalled. "You invented such a tissue of falsities and calumnies, +and you talk about your conscience? You stand there in your senses +and proclaim your crime?" + +"I'd have committed any crime that would have rescued us." + +"You insult and blacken and ruin your own father?" Godfrey kept on. + +"He'll never know it; she took a vow she wouldn't tell him." + +"Ah I'll he damned if _I_ won't tell him!" he rang out. + +Adela felt sick at this, but she flamed up to resent the treachery, +as it struck her, of such a menace. "I did right--I did right!" she +vehemently declared "I went down on my knees to pray for guidance, +and I saved mamma's memory from outrage. But if I hadn't, if I +hadn't"--she faltered an instant--"I'm not worse than you, and I'm +not so bad, for you've done something that you're ashamed to tell +me." + +He had taken out his watch; he looked at it with quick intensity, as +if not hearing nor heeding her. Then, his calculating eyes raised, +he fixed her long enough to exclaim with unsurpassable horror and +contempt: "You raving maniac!" He turned away from her; he bounded +down the avenue in the direction from which they had come, and, while +she watched him, strode away, across the grass, toward the short cut +to the station. + + + +CHAPTER IV + + + +His bags, by the time she got home, had been brought to the house, +but Beatrice and Muriel, immediately informed of this, waited for +their brother in vain. Their sister said nothing to them of her +having seen him, and she accepted after a little, with a calmness +that surprised herself, the idea that he had returned to town to +denounce her. She believed this would make no difference now--she +had done what she had done. She had somehow a stiff faith in Mrs. +Churchley. Once that so considerable mass had received its impetus +it wouldn't, it couldn't pull up. It represented a heavy-footed +person, incapable of further agility. Adela recognised too how well +it might have come over her that there were too many children. +Lastly the girl fortified herself with the reflexion, grotesque in +the conditions and conducing to prove her sense of humour not high, +that her father was after all not a man to be played with. It seemed +to her at any rate that if she HAD baffled his unholy purpose she +could bear anything--bear imprisonment and bread and water, bear +lashes and torture, bear even his lifelong reproach. What she could +bear least was the wonder of the inconvenience she had inflicted on +Godfrey. She had time to turn this over, very vainly, for a +succession of days--days more numerous than she had expected, which +passed without bringing her from London any summons to come up and +take her punishment. She sounded the possible, she compared the +degrees of the probable; feeling however that as a cloistered girl +she was poorly equipped for speculation. She tried to imagine the +calamitous things young men might do, and could only feel that such +things would naturally be connected either with borrowed money or +with bad women. She became conscious that after all she knew almost +nothing about either of those interests. The worst woman she knew +was Mrs. Churchley herself. Meanwhile there was no reverberation +from Seymour Street--only a sultry silence. + +At Brinton she spent hours in her mother's garden, where she had +grown up, where she considered that she was training for old age, +since she meant not to depend on whist. She loved the place as, had +she been a good Catholic, she would have loved the smell of her +parish church; and indeed there was in her passion for flowers +something of the respect of a religion. They seemed to her the only +things in the world that really respected themselves, unless one made +an exception for Nutkins, who had been in command all through her +mother's time, with whom she had had a real friendship and who had +been affected by their pure example. He was the person left in the +world with whom on the whole she could speak most intimately of the +dead. They never had to name her together--they only said "she"; and +Nutkins freely conceded that she had taught him everything he knew. +When Beatrice and Muriel said "she" they referred to Mrs. Churchley. +Adela had reason to believe she should never marry, and that some day +she should have about a thousand a year. This made her see in the +far future a little garden of her own, under a hill, full of rare and +exquisite things, where she would spend most of her old age on her +knees with an apron and stout gloves, with a pair of shears and a +trowel, steeped in the comfort of being thought mad. + +One morning ten days after her scene with Godfrey, on coming back +into the house shortly before lunch, she was met by Miss Flynn with +the notification that a lady in the drawing-room had been waiting for +her for some minutes. "A lady" suggested immediately Mrs. Churchley. +It came over Adela that the form in which her penalty was to descend +would be a personal explanation with that misdirected woman. The +lady had given no name, and Miss Flynn hadn't seen Mrs. Churchley; +nevertheless the governess was certain Adela's surmise was wrong. + +"Is she big and dreadful?" the girl asked. + +Miss Flynn, who was circumspection itself, took her time. "She's +dreadful, but she's not big." She added that she wasn't sure she +ought to let Adela go in alone; but this young lady took herself +throughout for a heroine, and it wasn't in a heroine to shrink from +any encounter. Wasn't she every instant in transcendent contact with +her mother? The visitor might have no connexion whatever with the +drama of her father's frustrated marriage; but everything to-day for +Adela was part of that. + +Miss Flynn's description had prepared her for a considerable shock, +but she wasn't agitated by her first glimpse of the person who +awaited her. A youngish well-dressed woman stood there, and silence +was between them while they looked at each other. Before either had +spoken however Adela began to see what Miss Flynn had intended. In +the light of the drawing-room window the lady was five-and-thirty +years of age and had vivid yellow hair. She also had a blue cloth +suit with brass buttons, a stick-up collar like a gentleman's, a +necktie arranged in a sailor's knot, a golden pin in the shape of a +little lawn-tennis racket, and pearl-grey gloves with big black +stitchings. Adela's second impression was that she was an actress, +and her third that no such person had ever before crossed that +threshold. + +"I'll tell you what I've come for," said the apparition. "I've come +to ask you to intercede." She wasn't an actress; an actress would +have had a nicer voice. + +"To intercede?" Adela was too bewildered to ask her to sit down. + +"With your father, you know. He doesn't know, but he'll have to." +Her "have" sounded like "'ave." She explained, with many more such +sounds, that she was Mrs. Godfrey, that they had been married seven +mortal months. If Godfrey was going abroad she must go with him, and +the only way she could go with him would be for his father to do +something. He was afraid of his father--that was clear; he was +afraid even to tell him. What she had come down for was to see some +other member of the family face to face--"fice to fice," Mrs. Godfrey +called it--and try if he couldn't be approached by another side. If +no one else would act then she would just have to act herself. The +Colonel would have to do something--that was the only way out of it. + +What really happened Adela never quite understood; what seemed to be +happening was that the room went round and round. Through the blur +of perception accompanying this effect the sharp stabs of her +visitor's revelation came to her like the words heard by a patient +"going off" under ether. She afterwards denied passionately even to +herself that she had done anything so abject as to faint; but there +was a lapse in her consciousness on the score of Miss Flynn's +intervention. This intervention had evidently been active, for when +they talked the matter over, later in the day, with bated breath and +infinite dissimulation for the school-room quarter, the governess had +more lurid truths, and still more, to impart than to receive. She +was at any rate under the impression that she had athletically +contended, in the drawing-room, with the yellow hair--this after +removing Adela from the scene and before inducing Mrs. Godfrey to +withdraw. Miss Flynn had never known a more thrilling day, for all +the rest of it too was pervaded with agitations and conversations, +precautions and alarms. It was given out to Beatrice and Muriel that +their sister had been taken suddenly ill, and the governess +ministered to her in her room. Indeed Adela had never found herself +less at ease, for this time she had received a blow that she couldn't +return. There was nothing to do but to take it, to endure the +humiliation of her wound. + +At first she declined to take it--having, as might appear, the much +more attractive resource of regarding her visitant as a mere +masquerading person, an impudent impostor. On the face of the matter +moreover it wasn't fair to believe till one heard; and to hear in +such a case was to hear Godfrey himself. Whatever she had tried to +imagine about him she hadn't arrived at anything so belittling as an +idiotic secret marriage with a dyed and painted hag. Adela repeated +this last word as if it gave her comfort; and indeed where everything +was so bad fifteen years of seniority made the case little worse. +Miss Flynn was portentous, for Miss Flynn had had it out with the +wretch. She had cross-questioned her and had not broken her down. +This was the most uplifted hour of Miss Flynn's life; for whereas she +usually had to content herself with being humbly and gloomily in the +right she could now be magnanimously and showily so. Her only +perplexity was as to what she ought to do--write to Colonel Chart or +go up to town to see him. She bloomed with alternatives--she +resembled some dull garden-path which under a copious downpour has +begun to flaunt with colour. Toward evening Adela was obliged to +recognise that her brother's worry, of which he had spoken to her, +had appeared bad enough to consist even of a low wife, and to +remember that, so far from its being inconceivable a young man in his +position should clandestinely take one, she had been present, years +before, during her mother's lifetime, when Lady Molesley declared +gaily, over a cup of tea, that this was precisely what she expected +of her eldest son. The next morning it was the worst possibilities +that seemed clearest; the only thing left with a tatter of dusky +comfort being the ambiguity of Godfrey's charge that her own action +had "done" for him. That was a matter by itself, and she racked her +brains for a connecting link between Mrs. Churchley and Mrs. Godfrey. +At last she made up her mind that they were related by blood; very +likely, though differing in fortune, they were cousins or even +sisters. But even then what did the wretched boy mean? + +Arrested by the unnatural fascination of opportunity, Miss Flynn +received before lunch a telegram from Colonel Chart--an order for +dinner and a vehicle; he and Godfrey were to arrive at six o'clock. +Adela had plenty of occupation for the interval, since she was +pitying her father when she wasn't rejoicing that her mother had gone +too soon to know. She flattered herself she made out the +providential reason of that cruelty now. She found time however +still to wonder for what purpose, given the situation, Godfrey was to +he brought down. She wasn't unconscious indeed that she had little +general knowledge of what usually was done with young men in that +predicament. One talked about the situation, but the situation was +an abyss. She felt this still more when she found, on her father's +arrival, that nothing apparently was to happen as she had taken for +granted it would. There was an inviolable hush over the whole +affair, but no tragedy, no publicity, nothing ugly. The tragedy had +been in town--the faces of the two men spoke of it in spite of their +other perfunctory aspects; and at present there was only a family +dinner, with Beatrice and Muriel and the governess--with almost a +company tone too, the result of the desire to avoid publicity. Adela +admired her father; she knew what he was feeling if Mrs. Godfrey had +been at him, and yet she saw him positively gallant. He was mildly +austere, or rather even--what was it?--august; just as, coldly +equivocal, he never looked at his son, so that at moments he struck +her as almost sick with sadness. Godfrey was equally inscrutable and +therefore wholly different from what he had been as he stood before +her in the park. If he was to start on his career (with such a +wife!--wouldn't she utterly blight it?) he was already professional +enough to know how to wear a mask. + +Before they rose from table she felt herself wholly bewildered, so +little were such large causes traceable in their effects. She had +nerved herself for a great ordeal, but the air was as sweet as an +anodyne. It was perfectly plain to her that her father was deadly +sore--as pathetic as a person betrayed. He was broken, but he showed +no resentment; there was a weight on his heart, but he had lightened +it by dressing as immaculately as usual for dinner. She asked +herself what immensity of a row there could have been in town to have +left his anger so spent. He went through everything, even to sitting +with his son after dinner. When they came out together he invited +Beatrice and Muriel to the billiard-room, and as Miss Flynn +discreetly withdrew Adela was left alone with Godfrey, who was +completely changed and not now in the least of a rage. He was broken +too, but not so pathetic as his father. He was only very correct and +apologetic he said to his sister: "I'm awfully sorry YOU were +annoyed--it was something I never dreamed of." + +She couldn't think immediately what he meant; then she grasped the +reference to her extraordinary invader. She was uncertain, however, +what tone to take; perhaps his father had arranged with him that they +were to make the best of it. But she spoke her own despair in the +way she murmured "Oh Godfrey, Godfrey, is it true?" + +"I've been the most unutterable donkey--you can say what you like to +me. You can't say anything worse than I've said to myself." + +"My brother, my brother!"--his words made her wail it out. He hushed +her with a movement and she asked: "What has father said?" + +He looked very high over her head. "He'll give her six hundred a +year." + +"Ah the angel!"--it was too splendid. + +"On condition"--Godfrey scarce blinked--"she never comes near me. +She has solemnly promised, and she'll probably leave me alone to get +the money. If she doesn't--in diplomacy--I'm lost." He had been +turning his eyes vaguely about, this way and that, to avoid meeting +hers; but after another instant he gave up the effort and she had the +miserable confession of his glance. "I've been living in hell." + +"My brother, my brother!" she yearningly repeated. + +"I'm not an idiot; yet for her I've behaved like one. Don't ask me-- +you mustn't know. It was all done in a day, and since then fancy my +condition; fancy my work in such a torment; fancy my coming through +at all." + +"Thank God you passed!" she cried. "You were wonderful!" + +"I'd have shot myself if I hadn't been. I had an awful day yesterday +with the governor; it was late at night before it was over. I leave +England next week. He brought me down here for it to look well--so +that the children shan't know." + +"HE'S wonderful too!" Adela murmured. + +"Wonderful too!" Godfrey echoed. + +"Did SHE tell him?" the girl went on. + +"She came straight to Seymour Street from here. She saw him alone +first; then he called me in. THAT luxury lasted about an hour." + +"Poor, poor father!" Adela moaned at this; on which her brother +remained silent. Then after he had alluded to it as the scene he had +lived in terror of all through his cramming, and she had sighed forth +again her pity and admiration for such a mixture of anxieties and +such a triumph of talent, she pursued: "Have you told him?" + +"Told him what?" + +"What you said you would--what _I_ did." + +Godfrey turned away as if at present he had very little interest in +that inferior tribulation. "I was angry with you, but I cooled off. +I held my tongue." + +She clasped her hands. "You thought of mamma!" + +"Oh don't speak of mamma!" he cried as in rueful tenderness. + +It was indeed not a happy moment, and she murmured: "No; if you HAD +thought of her--!" + +This made Godfrey face her again with a small flare in his eyes. "Oh +THEN it didn't prevent. I thought that woman really good. I +believed in her." + +"Is she VERY bad?" + +"I shall never mention her to you again," he returned with dignity. + +"You may believe _I_ won't speak of her! So father doesn't know?" +the girl added. + +"Doesn't know what?" + +"That I said what I did to Mrs. Churchley." + +He had a momentary pause. "I don't think so, but you must find out +for yourself." + +"I shall find out," said Adela. "But what had Mrs. Churchley to do +with it?" + +"With MY misery? I told her. I had to tell some one." + +"Why didn't you tell me?" + +He appeared--though but after an instant--to know exactly why. "Oh +you take things so beastly hard--you make such rows." Adela covered +her face with her hands and he went on: "What I wanted was comfort-- +not to be lashed up. I thought I should go mad. I wanted Mrs. +Churchley to break it to father, to intercede for me and help him to +meet it. She was awfully kind to me, she listened and she +understood; she could fancy how it had happened. Without her I +shouldn't have pulled through. She liked me, you know," he further +explained, and as if it were quite worth mentioning--all the more +that it was pleasant to him. "She said she'd do what she could for +me. She was full of sympathy and resource. I really leaned on her. +But when YOU cut in of course it spoiled everything. That's why I +was so furious with you. She couldn't do anything then." + +Adela dropped her hands, staring; she felt she had walked in +darkness. "So that he had to meet it alone?" + +"Dame!" said Godfrey, who had got up his French tremendously. + +Muriel came to the door to say papa wished the two others to join +them, and the next day Godfrey returned to town. His father remained +at Brinton, without an intermission, the rest of the summer and the +whole of the autumn, and Adela had a chance to find out, as she had +said, whether he knew she had interfered. But in spite of her chance +she never found out. He knew Mrs. Churchley had thrown him over and +he knew his daughter rejoiced in it, but he appeared not to have +divined the relation between the two facts. It was strange that one +of the matters he was clearest about--Adela's secret triumph--should +have been just the thing which from this time on justified less and +less such a confidence. She was too sorry for him to be consistently +glad. She watched his attempts to wind himself up on the subject of +shorthorns and drainage, and she favoured to the utmost of her +ability his intermittent disposition to make a figure in orchids. +She wondered whether they mightn't have a few people at Brinton; but +when she mentioned the idea he asked what in the world there would be +to attract them. It was a confoundedly stupid house, he remarked-- +with all respect to HER cleverness. Beatrice and Muriel were +mystified; the prospect of going out immensely had faded so utterly +away. They were apparently not to go out at all. Colonel Chart was +aimless and bored; he paced up and down and went back to smoking, +which was bad for him, and looked drearily out of windows as if on +the bare chance that something might arrive. Did he expect Mrs. +Churchley to arrive, did he expect her to relent on finding she +couldn't live without him? It was Adela's belief that she gave no +sign. But the girl thought it really remarkable of her not to have +betrayed her ingenious young visitor. Adela's judgement of human +nature was perhaps harsh, but she believed that most women, given the +various facts, wouldn't have been so forbearing. This lady's +conception of the point of honour placed her there in a finer and +purer light than had at all originally promised to shine about her. + +She meanwhile herself could well judge how heavy her father found the +burden of Godfrey's folly and how he was incommoded at having to pay +the horrible woman six hundred a year. Doubtless he was having +dreadful letters from her; doubtless she threatened them all with +hideous exposure. If the matter should be bruited Godfrey's +prospects would collapse on the spot. He thought Madrid very +charming and curious, but Mrs. Godfrey was in England, so that his +father had to face the music. Adela took a dolorous comfort in her +mother's being out of that--it would have killed her; but this didn't +blind her to the fact that the comfort for her father would perhaps +have been greater if he had had some one to talk to about his +trouble. He never dreamed of doing so to her, and she felt she +couldn't ask him. In the family life he wanted utter silence about +it. Early in the winter he went abroad for ten weeks, leaving her +with her sisters in the country, where it was not to be denied that +at this time existence had very little savour. She half expected her +sister-in-law would again descend on her; but the fear wasn't +justified, and the quietude of the awful creature seemed really to +vibrate with the ring of gold-pieces. There were sure to be extras. +Adela winced at the extras. Colonel Chart went to Paris and to Monte +Carlo and then to Madrid to see his boy. His daughter had the vision +of his perhaps meeting Mrs. Churchley somewhere, since, if she had +gone for a year, she would still be on the Continent. If he should +meet her perhaps the affair would come on again: she caught herself +musing over this. But he brought back no such appearance, and, +seeing him after an interval, she was struck afresh with his jilted +and wasted air. She didn't like it--she resented it. A little more +and she would have said that that was no way to treat so faithful a +man. + +They all went up to town in March, and on one of the first days of +April she saw Mrs. Churchley in the Park. She herself remained +apparently invisible to that lady--she herself and Beatrice and +Muriel, who sat with her in their mother's old bottle-green landau. +Mrs. Churchley, perched higher than ever, rode by without a +recognition; but this didn't prevent Adela's going to her before the +month was over. As on her great previous occasion she went in the +morning, and she again had the good fortune to be admitted. This +time, however, her visit was shorter, and a week after making it--the +week was a desolation--she addressed to her brother at Madrid a +letter containing these words: "I could endure it no longer--I +confessed and retracted; I explained to her as well as I could the +falsity of what I said to her ten months ago and the benighted purity +of my motives for saying it. I besought her to regard it as unsaid, +to forgive me, not to despise me too much, to take pity on poor +PERFECT papa and come back to him. She was more good-natured than +you might have expected--indeed she laughed extravagantly. She had +never believed me--it was too absurd; she had only, at the time, +disliked me. She found me utterly false--she was very frank with me +about this--and she told papa she really thought me horrid. She said +she could never live with such a girl, and as I would certainly never +marry I must be sent away--in short she quite loathed me. Papa +defended me, he refused to sacrifice me, and this led practically to +their rupture. Papa gave her up, as it were, for ME. Fancy the +angel, and fancy what I must try to be to him for the rest of his +life! Mrs. Churchley can never come back--she's going to marry Lord +Dovedale." + + + + + +End of The Project Gutenberg Etext of The Marriages, by Henry James** + diff --git a/old/tmrgs10.zip b/old/tmrgs10.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..216707f --- /dev/null +++ b/old/tmrgs10.zip |
