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diff --git a/238-h/238-h.htm b/238-h/238-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..1e7c4fc --- /dev/null +++ b/238-h/238-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,9747 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" +"http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=utf-8" /> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> +<title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Dear Enemy, by Jean Webster</title> +<link rel="coverpage" href="images/cover.jpg" /> +<style type="text/css" xml:space="preserve"> + +body { margin-left: 20%; + margin-right: 20%; + text-align: justify; } + +h1, h2, h3, h4, h5 {text-align: center; font-style: normal; font-weight: +normal; line-height: 1.5; margin-top: .5em; margin-bottom: .5em;} + +h1 {font-size: 300%; + margin-top: 0.6em; + margin-bottom: 0.6em; + letter-spacing: 0.12em; + word-spacing: 0.2em; + text-indent: 0em;} +h2 {font-size: 150%; margin-top: 2em; margin-bottom: 1em;} +h3 {font-size: 130%; margin-top: 1em;} +h4 {font-size: 120%;} +h5 {font-size: 110%;} + +.no-break {page-break-before: avoid;} /* for epubs */ + +div.chapter {page-break-before: always; margin-top: 4em;} + +hr {width: 80%; margin-top: 2em; margin-bottom: 2em;} + +p {text-indent: 1em; + margin-top: 0.25em; + margin-bottom: 0.25em; } + +p.poem {text-indent: 0%; + margin-left: 10%; + font-size: 90%; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em; } + +p.letter {text-indent: 0%; + margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em; } + +p.noindent {text-indent: 0% } + +p.center {text-align: center; + text-indent: 0em; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em; } + +p.right {text-align: right; + margin-right: 10%; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em; } + +div.fig { display:block; + margin:0 auto; + text-align:center; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em;} + +a:link {color:blue; text-decoration:none} +a:visited {color:blue; text-decoration:none} +a:hover {color:red} + +</style> +</head> +<body> + +<div style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Dear Enemy, by Jean Webster</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and +most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions +whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms +of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online +at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you +are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the +country where you are located before using this eBook. +</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Dear Enemy</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Jean Webster</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: March, 1995 [eBook #238]<br /> +[Most recently updated: November 10, 2022]</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Character set encoding: UTF-8</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Produced by: Mike Lynch and David Widger</div> +<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DEAR ENEMY ***</div> + +<div class="fig" style="width:55%;"> +<img src="images/cover.jpg" style="width:100%;" alt="[Illustration]" /> +</div> + +<h1>DEAR ENEMY</h1> + +<h2 class="no-break">By Jean Webster</h2> + +<hr /> + +<div class="chapter"> + + <p> + STONE GATE, WORCESTER, MASSACHUSETTS, + </p> + <p> + December 27. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Your letter is here. I have read it twice, and with amazement. Do I + understand that Jervis has given you, for a Christmas present, the making + over of the John Grier Home into a model institution, and that you have + chosen me to disburse the money? Me—I, Sallie McBride, the head of + an orphan asylum! My poor people, have you lost your senses, or have you + become addicted to the use of opium, and is this the raving of two fevered + imaginations? I am exactly as well fitted to take care of one hundred + children as to become the curator of a zoo. + </p> + <p> + And you offer as bait an interesting Scotch doctor? My dear Judy,—likewise + my dear Jervis,—I see through you! I know exactly the kind of family + conference that has been held about the Pendleton fireside. + </p> + <p> + "Isn't it a pity that Sallie hasn't amounted to more since she left + college? She ought to be doing something useful instead of frittering her + time away in the petty social life of Worcester. Also [Jervis speaks] she + is getting interested in that confounded young Hallock, too good-looking + and fascinating and erratic; I never did like politicians. We must deflect + her mind with some uplifting and absorbing occupation until the danger is + past. Ha! I have it! We will put her in charge of the John Grier Home." + Oh, I can hear him as clearly as if I were there! On the occasion of my + last visit in your delectable household Jervis and I had a very solemn + conversation in regard to (1) marriage, (2) the low ideals of politicians, + (3) the frivolous, useless lives that society women lead. + </p> + <p> + Please tell your moral husband that I took his words deeply to heart, and + that ever since my return to Worcester I have been spending one afternoon + a week reading poetry with the inmates of the Female Inebriate Asylum. My + life is not so purposeless as it appears. + </p> + <p> + Also let me assure you that the politician is not dangerously imminent; + and that, anyway, he is a very desirable politician, even though his views + on tariff and single tax and trade-unionism do not exactly coincide with + Jervis's. + </p> + <p> + Your desire to dedicate my life to the public good is very sweet, but you + should look at it from the asylum's point of view. + </p> + <p> + Have you no pity for those poor defenseless little orphan children? + </p> + <p> + I have, if you haven't, and I respectfully decline the position which you + offer. + </p> + <p> + I shall be charmed, however, to accept your invitation to visit you in New + York, though I must acknowledge that I am not very excited over the list + of gaieties you have planned. + </p> + <p> + Please substitute for the New York Orphanage and the Foundling Hospital a + few theaters and operas and a dinner or so. I have two new evening gowns + and a blue and gold coat with a white fur collar. + </p> + <p> + I dash to pack them; so telegraph fast if you don't wish to see me for + myself alone, but only as a successor to Mrs. Lippett. Yours as ever, + </p> + <p> + Entirely frivolous, + </p> + <p> + And intending to remain so, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Your invitation is especially seasonable. A charming young politician + named Gordon Hallock is to be in New York next week. I am sure you will + like him when you know him better. P.S. 2. Sallie taking her afternoon + walk as Judy would like to see her: + </p> + <p> + I ask you again, have you both gone mad? + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + February 15. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + We arrived in a snowstorm at eleven last night, Singapore and Jane and I. + It does not appear to be customary for superintendents of orphan asylums + to bring with them personal maids and Chinese chows. The night watchman + and housekeeper, who had waited up to receive me, were thrown into an + awful flutter. They had never seen the like of Sing, and thought that I + was introducing a wolf into the fold. I reassured them as to his + dogginess, and the watchman, after studying his black tongue, ventured a + witticism. He wanted to know if I fed him on huckleberry pie. + </p> + <p> + It was difficult to find accommodations for my family. Poor Sing was + dragged off whimpering to a strange woodshed, and given a piece of burlap. + Jane did not fare much better. There was not an extra bed in the building, + barring a five-foot crib in the hospital room. She, as you know, + approaches six. We tucked her in, and she spent the night folded up like a + jackknife. She has limped about today, looking like a decrepit letter S, + openly deploring this latest escapade on the part of her flighty mistress, + and longing for the time when we shall come to our senses, and return to + the parental fireside in Worcester. + </p> + <p> + I know that she is going to spoil all my chances of being popular with the + rest of the staff. Having her here is the silliest idea that was ever + conceived, but you know my family. I fought their objections step by step, + but they made their last stand on Jane. If I brought her along to see that + I ate nourishing food and didn't stay up all night, I might come—temporarily; + but if I refused to bring her—oh, dear me, I am not sure that I was + ever again to cross the threshold of Stone Gate! So here we are, and + neither of us very welcome, I am afraid. + </p> + <p> + I woke by a gong at six this morning, and lay for a time listening to the + racket that twenty-five little girls made in the lavatory over my head. It + appears that they do not get baths,—just face-washes,—but they + make as much splashing as twenty-five puppies in a pool. I rose and + dressed and explored a bit. You were wise in not having me come to look + the place over before I engaged. + </p> + <p> + While my little charges were at breakfast, it seemed a happy time to + introduce myself; so I sought the dining room. Horror piled on horror—those + bare drab walls and oil-cloth-covered tables with tin cups and plates and + wooden benches, and, by way of decoration, that one illuminated text, "The + Lord Will Provide"! The trustee who added that last touch must possess a + grim sense of humor. + </p> + <p> + Really, Judy, I never knew there was any spot in the world so entirely + ugly; and when I saw those rows and rows of pale, listless, blue-uniformed + children, the whole dismal business suddenly struck me with such a shock + that I almost collapsed. It seemed like an unachievable goal for one + person to bring sunshine to one hundred little faces when what they need + is a mother apiece. + </p> + <p> + I plunged into this thing lightly enough, partly because you were too + persuasive, and mostly, I honestly think, because that scurrilous Gordon + Hallock laughed so uproariously at the idea of my being able to manage an + asylum. Between you all you hypnotized me. And then of course, after I + began reading up on the subject and visiting all those seventeen + institutions, I got excited over orphans, and wanted to put my own ideas + into practice. But now I'm aghast at finding myself here; it's such a + stupendous undertaking. The future health and happiness of a hundred human + beings lie in my hands, to say nothing of their three or four hundred + children and thousand grandchildren. The thing's geometrically + progressive. It's awful. Who am I to undertake this job? Look, oh, look + for another superintendent! + </p> + <p> + Jane says dinner's ready. Having eaten two of your institution meals, the + thought of another doesn't excite me. + </p> + <p> + LATER. + </p> + <p> + The staff had mutton hash and spinach, with tapioca pudding for dessert. + What the children had I hate to consider. + </p> + <p> + I started to tell you about my first official speech at breakfast this + morning. It dealt with all the wonderful new changes that are to come to + the John Grier Home through the generosity of Mr. Jervis Pendleton, the + president of our board of trustees, and of Mrs. Pendleton, the dear "Aunt + Judy" of every little boy and girl here. + </p> + <p> + Please don't object to my featuring the Pendleton family so prominently. I + did it for political reasons. As the entire working staff of the + institution was present, I thought it a good opportunity to emphasize the + fact that all of these upsetting, innovations come straight from + headquarters, and not out of my excitable brain. + </p> + <p> + The children stopped eating and stared. The conspicuous color of my hair + and the frivolous tilt of my nose are evidently new attributes in a + superintendent. My colleagues also showed plainly that they consider me + too young and too inexperienced to be set in authority. I haven't seen + Jervis's wonderful Scotch doctor yet, but I assure you that he will have + to be VERY wonderful to make up for the rest of these people, especially + the kindergarten teacher. Miss Snaith and I clashed early on the subject + of fresh air; but I intend to get rid of this dreadful institution smell, + if I freeze every child into a little ice statue. + </p> + <p> + This being a sunny, sparkling, snowy afternoon, I ordered that dungeon of + a playroom closed and the children out of doors. + </p> + <p> + "She's chasin' us out," I heard one small urchin grumbling as he struggled + into a two-years-too-small overcoat. + </p> + <p> + They simply stood about the yard, all humped in their clothes, waiting + patiently to be allowed to come back in. No running or shouting or + coasting or snowballs. Think of it! These children don't know how to play. + </p> + <p> + STILL LATER. + </p> + <p> + I have already begun the congenial task of spending your money. I bought + eleven hot-water bottles this afternoon (every one that the village drug + store contained) likewise some woolen blankets and padded quilts. And the + windows are wide open in the babies' dormitory. Those poor little tots are + going to enjoy the perfectly new sensation of being able to breathe at + night. + </p> + <p> + There are a million things I want to grumble about, but it's half-past + ten, and Jane says I MUST go to bed. + </p> + <p> + Yours in command, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Before turning in, I tiptoed through the corridor to make sure that + all was right, and what do you think I found? Miss Snaith softly closing + the windows in the babies' dormitory! Just as soon as I can find a + suitable position for her in an old ladies' home, I am going to discharge + that woman. + </p> + <p> + Jane takes the pen from my hand. + </p> + <p> + Good night. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + February 20. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Dr. Robin MacRae called this afternoon to make the acquaintance of the new + superintendent. Please invite him to dinner upon the occasion of his next + visit to New York, and see for yourself what your husband has done. Jervis + grossly misrepresented the facts when he led me to believe that one of the + chief advantages of my position would be the daily intercourse with a man + of Dr. MacRae's polish and brilliancy and scholarliness and charm. + </p> + <p> + He is tall and thinnish, with sandy hair and cold gray eyes. During the + hour he spent in my society (and I was very sprightly) no shadow of a + smile so much as lightened the straight line of his mouth. Can a shadow + lighten? Maybe not; but, anyway, what IS the matter with the man? Has he + committed some remorseful crime, or is his taciturnity due merely to his + natural Scotchness? He's as companionable as a granite tombstone! + </p> + <p> + Incidentally, our doctor didn't like me any more than I liked him. He + thinks I'm frivolous and inconsequential, and totally unfitted for this + position of trust. I dare say Jervis has had a letter from him by now + asking to have me removed. + </p> + <p> + In the matter of conversation we didn't hit it off in the least. He + discussed broadly and philosophically the evils of institutional care for + dependent children, while I lightly deplored the unbecoming coiffure that + prevails among our girls. + </p> + <p> + To prove my point, I had in Sadie Kate, my special errand orphan. Her hair + is strained back as tightly as though it had been done with a monkey + wrench, and is braided behind into two wiry little pigtails. Decidedly, + orphans' ears need to be softened. But Dr. Robin MacRae doesn't give a + hang whether their ears are becoming or not; what he cares about is their + stomachs. We also split upon the subject of red petticoats. I don't see + how any little girl can preserve any self-respect when dressed in a red + flannel petticoat an irregular inch longer than her blue checked gingham + dress; but he thinks that red petticoats are cheerful and warm and + hygienic. I foresee a warlike reign for the new superintendent. + </p> + <p> + In regard to the doctor, there is just one detail to be thankful for: he + is almost as new as I am, and he cannot instruct me in the traditions of + the asylum. I don't believe I COULD have worked with the old doctor, who, + judging from the specimens of his art that he left behind, knew as much + about babies as a veterinary surgeon. + </p> + <p> + In the matter of asylum etiquette, the entire staff has undertaken my + education. Even the cook this morning told me firmly that the John Grier + Home has corn meal mush on Wednesday nights. + </p> + <p> + Are you searching hard for another superintendent? I'll stay until she + comes, but please find her fast. + </p> + <p> + Yours, + </p> + <p> + With my mind made up, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + SUP'T'S OFFICE, JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + February 27. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + Are you still insulted because I wouldn't take your advice? Don't you know + that a reddish-haired person of Irish forebears, with a dash of Scotch, + can't be driven, but must be gently led? Had you been less obnoxiously + insistent, I should have listened sweetly, and been saved. As it is, I + frankly confess that I have spent the last five days in repenting our + quarrel. You were right, and I was wrong, and, as you see, I handsomely + acknowledge it. If I ever emerge from this present predicament, I shall in + the future be guided (almost always) by your judgment. Could any woman + make a more sweeping retraction than that? + </p> + <p> + The romantic glamour which Judy cast over this orphan asylum exists only + in her poetic imagination. The place is AWFUL. Words can't tell you how + dreary and dismal and smelly it is: long corridors, bare walls; + blue-uniformed, dough-faced little inmates that haven't the slightest + resemblance to human children. And oh, the dreadful institution smell! A + mingling of wet scrubbed floors, unaired rooms, and food for a hundred + people always steaming on the stove. + </p> + <p> + The asylum not only has to be made over, but every child as well, and it's + too herculean a task for such a selfish, luxurious, and lazy person as + Sallie McBride ever to have undertaken. I'm resigning the very first + moment that Judy can find a suitable successor, but that, I fear, will not + be immediately. She has gone off South, leaving me stranded, and of + course, after having promised, I can't simply abandon her asylum. But in + the meantime I assure you that I'm homesick. + </p> + <p> + Write me a cheering letter, and send a flower to brighten my private + drawing room. I inherited it, furnished, from Mrs. Lippett. The wall is + covered with a tapestry paper in brown and red; the furniture is + electric-blue plush, except the center table, which is gilt. Green + predominates in the carpet. If you presented some pink rosebuds, they + would complete the color scheme. + </p> + <p> + I really was obnoxious that last evening, but you are avenged. + </p> + <p> + Remorsefully yours, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. You needn't have been so grumpy about the Scotch doctor. The man is + everything dour that the word "Scotch" implies. I detest him on sight, and + he detests me. Oh, we're going to have a sweet time working together + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + February 22. + </p> + <p> + My dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + Your vigorous and expensive message is here. I know that you have plenty + of money, but that is no reason why you should waste it so frivolously. + When you feel so bursting with talk that only a hundred-word telegram will + relieve an explosion, at least turn it into a night lettergram. My orphans + can use the money if you don't need it. + </p> + <p> + Also, my dear sir, please use a trifle of common sense. Of course I can't + chuck the asylum in the casual manner you suggest. It wouldn't be fair to + Judy and Jervis. If you will pardon the statement, they have been my + friends for many more years than you, and I have no intention of letting + them go hang. I came up here in a spirit of—well, say adventure, and + I must see the venture through. You wouldn't like me if I were a short + sport. This doesn't mean, however, that I am sentencing myself for life; I + am intending to resign just as soon as the opportunity comes. But really + I ought to feel somewhat gratified that the Pendletons were willing to + trust me with such a responsible post. Though you, my dear sir, do not + suspect it, I possess considerable executive ability, and more common + sense than is visible on the surface. If I chose to put my whole soul into + this enterprise, I could make the rippingest superintendent that any 111 + orphans ever had. + </p> + <p> + I suppose you think that's funny? It's true. Judy and Jervis know it, and + that's why they asked me to come. So you see, when they have shown so much + confidence in me, I can't throw them over in quite the unceremonious + fashion you suggest. So long as I am here, I am going to accomplish just + as much as it is given one person to accomplish every twenty-four hours. I + am going to turn the place over to my successor with things moving fast in + the right direction. + </p> + <p> + But in the meantime please don't wash your hands of me under the belief + that I'm too busy to be homesick; for I'm not. I wake up every morning and + stare at Mrs. Lippett's wallpaper in a sort of daze, feeling as though + it's some bad dream, and I'm not really here. What on earth was I thinking + of to turn my back upon my nice cheerful own home and the good times that + by rights are mine? I frequently agree with your opinion of my sanity. + </p> + <p> + But why, may I ask, should you be making such a fuss? You wouldn't be + seeing me in any case. Worcester is quite as far from Washington as the + John Grier Home. And I will add, for your further comfort, that whereas + there is no man in the neighborhood of this asylum who admires red hair, + in Worcester there are several. Therefore, most difficult of men, please + be appeased. I didn't come entirely to spite you. I wanted an adventure in + life, and, oh dear! oh dear! I'm having it! PLEASE write soon, and cheer + me up. Yours in sackcloth, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + February 24. Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + You tell Jervis that I am not hasty at forming judgments. I have a sweet, + sunny, unsuspicious nature, and I like everybody, almost. But no one could + like that Scotch doctor. He NEVER smiles. + </p> + <p> + He paid me another visit this afternoon. I invited him to accommodate + himself in one of Mrs. Lippett's electric-blue chairs, and then sat down + opposite to enjoy the harmony. He was dressed in a mustard-colored + homespun, with a dash of green and a glint of yellow in the weave, a + "heather mixture" calculated to add life to a dull Scotch moor. Purple + socks and a red tie, with an amethyst pin, completed the picture. Clearly, + your paragon of a doctor is not going to be of much assistance in pulling + up the esthetic tone of this establishment. + </p> + <p> + During the fifteen minutes of his call he succinctly outlined all the + changes he wishes to see accomplished in this institution. HE forsooth! + And what, may I ask, are the duties of a superintendent? Is she merely a + figurehead to take orders from the visiting physician? + </p> + <p> + It's up wi' the bonnets o' McBride and MacRae! + </p> + <p> + I am, + </p> + <p> + Indignantly yours, SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Monday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Dr. MacRae: + </p> + <p> + I am sending this note by Sadie Kate, as it seems impossible to reach you + by telephone. Is the person who calls herself Mrs. McGur-rk and hangs up + in the middle of a sentence your housekeeper? If she answers the telephone + often, I don't see how your patients have any patience left. + </p> + <p> + As you did not come this morning, per agreement, and the painters did + come, I was fain to choose a cheerful corn color to be placed upon the + walls of your new laboratory room. I trust there is nothing unhygienic + about corn color. + </p> + <p> + Also, if you can spare a moment this afternoon, kindly motor yourself to + Dr. Brice's on Water Street and look at the dentist's chair and + appurtenances which are to be had at half-price. If all of the pleasant + paraphernalia of his profession were here,—in a corner of your + laboratory,—Dr. Brice could finish his 111 new patients with much + more despatch than if we had to transport them separately to Water Street. + Don't you think that's a useful idea? It came to me in the middle of the + night, but as I never happened to buy a dentist's chair before, I'd + appreciate some professional advice. Yours truly, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + March 1. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Do stop sending me telegrams! + </p> + <p> + Of course I know that you want to know everything that is happening, and I + would send a daily bulletin, but I truly don't find a minute. I am so + tired when night comes that if it weren't for Jane's strict discipline, I + should go to bed with my clothes on. + </p> + <p> + Later, when we slip a little more into routine, and I can be sure that my + assistants are all running off their respective jobs, I shall be the + regularest correspondent you ever had. + </p> + <p> + It was five days ago, wasn't it, that I wrote? Things have been happening + in those five days. The MacRae and I have mapped out a plan of campaign, + and are stirring up this place to its sluggish depths. I like him less and + less, but we have declared a sort of working truce. And the man IS a + worker. I always thought I had sufficient energy myself, but when an + improvement is to be introduced, I toil along panting in his wake. He is + as stubborn and tenacious and bull-doggish as a Scotchman can be, but he + does understand babies; that is, he understands their physiological + aspects. He hasn't any more feeling for them personally than for so many + frogs that he might happen to be dissecting. + </p> + <p> + Do you remember Jervis's holding forth one evening for an hour or so about + our doctor's beautiful humanitarian ideals? C'EST A RIRE! The man merely + regards the J. G. H. as his own private laboratory, where he can try out + scientific experiments with no loving parents to object. I shouldn't be + surprised anyday to find him introducing scarlet fever cultures into the + babies' porridge in order to test a newly invented serum. + </p> + <p> + Of the house staff, the only two who strike me as really efficient are the + primary teacher and the furnace-man. You should see how the children run + to meet Miss Matthews and beg for caresses, and how painstakingly polite + they are to the other teachers. Children are quick to size up character. I + shall be very embarrassed if they are too polite to me. + </p> + <p> + Just as soon as I get my bearings a little, and know exactly what we need, + I am going to accomplish some widespread discharging. I should like to + begin with Miss Snaith; but I discover that she is the niece of one of our + most generous trustees, and isn't exactly dischargeable. She's a vague, + chinless, pale-eyed creature, who talks through her nose and breathes + through her mouth. She can't say anything decisively and then stop; her + sentences all trail off into incoherent murmurings. Every time I see the + woman I feel an almost uncontrollable desire to take her by the shoulders + and shake some decision into her. And Miss Snaith is the one who has had + entire supervision of the seventeen little tots aged from two to five! + But, anyway, even if I can't discharge her, I have reduced her to a + subordinate position without her being aware of the fact. + </p> + <p> + The doctor has found for me a charming girl who lives a few miles from + here and comes in every day to manage the kindergarten. She has big, + gentle, brown eyes, like a cow's, and motherly manners (she is just + nineteen), and the babies love her. + </p> + <p> + At the head of the nursery I have placed a jolly, comfortable middle-aged + woman who has reared five of her own and has a hand with bairns. Our + doctor also found her. You see, he is useful. She is technically under + Miss Snaith, but is usurping dictatorship in a satisfactory fashion. I can + now sleep at night without being afraid that my babies are being + inefficiently murdered. + </p> + <p> + You see, our reforms are getting started; and while I acquiesce with all + the intelligence at my command to our doctor's basic scientific upheavals, + still, they sometimes leave me cold. The problem that keeps churning and + churning in my mind is: How can I ever instil enough love and warmth and + sunshine into those bleak little lives? And I am not sure that the + doctor's science will accomplish that. + </p> + <p> + One of our most pressing INTELLIGENT needs just now is to get our records + into coherent form. The books have been most outrageously unkept. Mrs. + Lippett had a big black account book into which she jumbled any facts that + happened to drift her way as to the children's family, their conduct, and + their health. But for weeks at a time she didn't trouble to make an entry. + If any adopting family wants to know a child's parentage, half the time we + can't even tell where we got the child! + </p> +<p class="poem"> + "Where did you come from, baby dear?"<br/> + "The blue sky opened, and I am here," +</p> + +<p class="noindent"> +is an exact description of their arrival. + </p> + <p> + We need a field worker to travel about the country and pick up all the + hereditary statistics she can about our chicks. It will be an easy matter, + as most of them have relatives. What do you think of Janet Ware for the + job? You remember what a shark she was in economics; she simply battened + on tables and charts and surveys. + </p> + <p> + I have also to inform you that the John Grier Home is undergoing a very + searching physical examination, and it is the shocking truth that out of + the twenty-eight poor little rats so far examined only five are up to + specification. And the five have not been here long. + </p> + <p> + Do you remember the ugly green reception room on the first floor? I have + removed as much of its greenness as possible, and fitted it up as the + doctor's laboratory. It contains scales and drugs and, most professional + touch of all, a dentist's chair and one of those sweet grinding machines. + (Bought them second-hand from Doctor Brice in the village, who is putting + in, for the gratification of his own patients, white enamel and + nickel-plate.) That drilling machine is looked upon as an infernal engine, + and I as an infernal monster for instituting it. But every little victim + who is discharged FILLED may come to my room every day for a week and + receive two pieces of chocolate. Though our children are not conspicuously + brave, they are, we discover, fighters. Young Thomas Kehoe nearly bit the + doctor's thumb in two after kicking over a tableful of instruments. It + requires physical strength as well as skill to be dental adviser to the J. + G. H. . . . . . . . . . . + </p> + <p> + Interrupted here to show a benevolent lady over the institution. She asked + fifty irrelevant questions, took up an hour of my time, then finally wiped + away a tear and left a dollar for my "poor little charges." + </p> + <p> + So far, my poor little charges are not enthusiastic about these new + reforms. They don't care much for the sudden draft of fresh air that has + blown in upon them, or the deluge of water. I am shoving in two baths a + week, and as soon as we collect tubs enough and a few extra faucets, they + are going to get SEVEN. + </p> + <p> + But at least I have started one most popular reform. Our daily bill of + fare has been increased, a change deplored by the cook as causing trouble, + and deplored by the rest of the staff as causing an immoral increase in + expense. ECONOMY spelt in capitals has been the guiding principle of this + institution for so many years that it has become a religion. I assure my + timid co-workers twenty times a day that, owing to the generosity of our + president, the endowment has been exactly doubled, and that I have vast + sums besides from Mrs. Pendleton for necessary purposes like ice cream. + But they simply CAN'T get over the feeling that it is a wicked + extravagance to feed these children. + </p> + <p> + The doctor and I have been studying with care the menus of the past, and + we are filled with amazement at the mind that could have devised them. + Here is one of her frequently recurring dinners: + </p> + +<p class="letter"> +Boiled potatoes<br/> +Boiled rice<br/> +Blanc mange + </p> + <p> + It's a wonder to me that the children are anything more than one hundred + and eleven little lumps of starch. + </p> + <p> + Looking about this institution, one is moved to misquote Robert Browning. + </p> + +<p class="poem"> + "There may be heaven; there must be hell;<br/> + Meantime, there is the John Grier—well!" +</p> + +<p class="right"> +S. McB. +</p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Saturday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Dr. Robin MacRae and I fought another battle yesterday over a very trivial + matter (in which I was right), and since then I have adopted for our + doctor a special pet name. "Good morning, Enemy!" was my greeting today, + at which he was quite solemnly annoyed. He says he does not wish to be + regarded as an enemy. He is not in the least antagonistic—so long as + I mold my policy upon his wishes! + </p> + <p> + We have two new children, Isador Gutschneider and Max Yog, given to us by + the Baptist Ladies' Aid Society. Where on earth do you suppose those + children picked up such a religion? I didn't want to take them, but the + poor ladies were very persuasive, and they pay the princely sum of four + dollars and fifty cents per week per child. This makes 113, which makes us + very crowded. I have half a dozen babies to give away. Find me some kind + families who want to adopt. + </p> + <p> + You know it's very embarrassing not to be able to remember offhand how + large your family is, but mine seems to vary from day to day, like the + stock market. I should like to keep it at about par. When a woman has more + than a hundred children, she can't give them the individual attention they + ought to have. + </p> + <p> + Monday. + </p> + <p> + This letter has been lying two days on my desk, and I haven't found the + time to stick on a stamp. But now I seem to have a free evening ahead, so + I will add a page or two more before starting it on a pleasant journey to + Florida. + </p> + <p> + I am just beginning to pick out individual faces among the children. It + seemed at first as though I could never learn them, they looked so + hopelessly cut out of one pattern, with those unspeakably ugly uniforms. + Now please don't write back that you want the children put into new + clothes immediately. I know you do; you've already told me five times. In + about a month I shall be ready to consider the question, but just now + their insides are more important than their outsides. + </p> + <p> + There is no doubt about it—orphans in the mass do not appeal to me. + I am beginning to be afraid that this famous mother instinct which we hear + so much about was left out of my character. Children as children are + dirty, spitty little things, and their noses all need wiping. Here and + there I pick out a naughty, mischievous little one that awakens a flicker + of interest; but for the most part they are just a composite blur of white + face and blue check. + </p> + <p> + With one exception, though. Sadie Kate Kilcoyne emerged from the mass the + first day, and bids fair to stay out for all time. She is my special + little errand girl, and she furnishes me with all my daily amusement. No + piece of mischief has been launched in this institution for the last eight + years that did not originate in her abnormal brain. This young person has, + to me, a most unusual history, though I understand it's common enough in + foundling circles. She was discovered eleven years ago on the bottom step + of a Thirty-ninth Street house, asleep in a pasteboard box labeled, + "Altman & Co." + </p> + <p> + "Sadie Kate Kilcoyne, aged five weeks. Be kind to her," was neatly printed + on the cover. + </p> + <p> + The policeman who picked her up took her to Bellevue where the foundlings + are pronounced, in the order of their arrival, "Catholic, Protestant, + Catholic, Protestant," with perfect impartiality. Our Sadie Kate, despite + her name and blue Irish eyes, was made a Protestant. And here she is + growing Irisher and Irisher every day, but, true to her christening, + protesting loudly against every detail of life. + </p> + <p> + Her two little black braids point in opposite directions; her little + monkey face is all screwed up with mischief; she is as active as a + terrier, and you have to keep her busy every moment. Her record of + badnesses occupies pages in the Doomsday Book. The last item reads: + </p> + <p> + "For stumping Maggie Geer to get a doorknob into her mouth—punishment, + the afternoon spent in bed, and crackers for supper." + </p> + <p> + It seems that Maggie Geer, fitted with a mouth of unusual stretching + capacity, got the doorknob in, but couldn't get it out. The doctor was + called, and cannily solved the problem with a buttered shoe-horn. + "Muckle-mouthed Meg," he has dubbed the patient ever since. + </p> + <p> + You can understand that my thoughts are anxiously occupied in filling + every crevice of Sadie Kate's existence. + </p> + <p> + There are a million subjects that I ought to consult with the president + about. I think it was very unkind of you and him to saddle me with your + orphan asylum and run off South to play. It would serve you right if I did + everything wrong. While you are traveling about in private cars, and + strolling in the moonlight on palm beaches, please think of me in the + drizzle of a New York March, taking care of 113 babies that by rights are + yours—and be grateful. + </p> + <p> + I remain (for a limited time), + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + SUP'T JOHN GRIER HOME. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + I am sending herewith (under separate cover) Sammy Speir, who got mislaid + when you paid your morning visit. Miss Snaith brought him to light after + you had gone. Please scrutinize his thumb. I never saw a felon, but I have + diagnosed it as such. Yours truly, S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + SUP'T JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + March 6. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I don't know yet whether the children are going to love me or not, but + they DO love my dog. No creature so popular as Singapore ever entered + these gates. Every afternoon three boys who have been perfect in + deportment are allowed to brush and comb him, while three other good boys + may serve him with food and drink. But every Saturday morning the climax + of the week is reached, when three superlatively good boys give him a nice + lathery bath with hot water and flea soap. The privilege of serving as + Singapore's valet is going to be the only incentive I shall need for + maintaining discipline. + </p> + <p> + But isn't it pathetically unnatural for these youngsters to be living in + the country and never owning a pet? Especially when they, of all children, + do so need something to love. I am going to manage pets for them somehow, + if I have to spend our new endowment for a menagerie. Couldn't you bring + back some baby alligators and a pelican? Anything alive will be gratefully + received. + </p> + <p> + This should by rights be my first "Trustees' Day." I am deeply grateful to + Jervis for arranging a simple business meeting in New York, as we are not + yet on dress parade up here; but we are hoping by the first Wednesday in + April to have something visible to show. If all of the doctor's ideas, and + a few of my own, get themselves materialized, our trustees will open their + eyes a bit when we show them about. + </p> + <p> + I have just made out a chart for next week's meals, and posted it in the + kitchen in the sight of an aggrieved cook. Variety is a word hitherto not + found in the lexicon of the J.G.H. You would never dream all of the + delightful surprises we are going to have: brown bread, corn pone, graham + muffins, samp, rice pudding with LOTS of raisins, thick vegetable soup, + macaroni Italian fashion, polenta cakes with molasses, apple dumplings, + gingerbread—oh, an endless list! After our biggest girls have + assisted in the manufacture of such appetizing dainties, they will almost + be capable of keeping future husbands in love with them. + </p> + <p> + Oh, dear me! Here I am babbling these silly nothings when I have some real + news up my sleeve. We have a new worker, a gem of a worker. + </p> + <p> + Do you remember Betsy Kindred, 1910? She led the glee club and was + president of dramatics. I remember her perfectly; she always had lovely + clothes. Well, if you please, she lives only twelve miles from here. I ran + across her by chance yesterday morning as she was motoring through the + village; or, rather, she just escaped running across me. + </p> + <p> + I never spoke to her in my life, but we greeted each other like the oldest + friends. It pays to have conspicuous hair; she recognized me instantly. I + hopped upon the running board of her car and said: + </p> + <p> + "Betsy Kindred, 1910, you've got to come back to my orphan asylum and help + me catalogue my orphans." + </p> + <p> + And it astonished her so that she came. She's to be here four or five days + a week as temporary secretary, and somehow I must manage to keep her + permanently. She's the most useful person I ever saw. I am hoping that + orphans will become such a habit with her that she won't be able to give + them up. I think she might stay if we pay her a big enough salary. She + likes to be independent of her family, as do all of us in these degenerate + times. + </p> + <p> + In my growing zeal for cataloguing people, I should like to get our doctor + tabulated. If Jervis knows any gossip about him, write it to me, please; + the worse, the better. He called yesterday to lance a felon on Sammy + Speir's thumb, then ascended to my electric-blue parlor to give + instructions as to the dressing of thumbs. The duties of a superintendent + are manifold. + </p> + <p> + It was just teatime, so I casually asked him to stay, and he did! Not for + the pleasure of my society,—no, indeed,—but because Jane + appeared at the moment with a plate of toasted muffins. He hadn't had any + luncheon, it seems, and dinner was a long way ahead. Between muffins (he + ate the whole plateful) he saw fit to interrogate me as to my preparedness + for this position. Had I studied biology in college? How far had I gone in + chemistry? What did I know of sociology? Had I visited that model + institution at Hastings? + </p> + <p> + To all of which I responded affably and openly. Then I permitted myself a + question or two: just what sort of youthful training had been required to + produce such a model of logic, accuracy, dignity, and common sense as I + saw sitting before me? Through persistent prodding I elicited a few + forlorn facts, but all quite respectable. You'd think, from his reticence, + there'd been a hanging in the family. The MacRae PERE was born in + Scotland, and came to the States to occupy a chair at Johns Hopkins; son + Robin was shipped back to Auld Reekie for his education. His grandmother + was a M'Lachlan of Strathlachan (I am sure she sounds respectable), and + his vacations were spent in the Hielands a-chasing the deer. + </p> + <p> + So much could I gather; so much, and no more. Tell me, I beg, some gossip + about my enemy—something scandalous by preference. + </p> + <p> + Why, if he is such an awfully efficient person does he bury himself in + this remote locality? You would think an up-and-coming scientific man + would want a hospital at one elbow and a morgue at the other. Are you sure + that he didn't commit a crime and isn't hiding from the law? + </p> + <p> + I seem to have covered a lot of paper without telling you much. VIVE LA + BAGATELLE! Yours as usual, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. I am relieved on one point. Dr. MacRae does not pick out his own + clothes. He leaves all such unessential trifles to his housekeeper, Mrs. + Maggie McGurk. + </p> + <p> + Again, and irrevocably, good-by! + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Wednesday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + Your roses and your letter cheered me for an entire morning, and it's the + first time I've approached cheerfulness since the fourteenth of February, + when I waved good-by to Worcester. + </p> + <p> + Words can't tell you how monotonously oppressive the daily round of + institution life gets to be. The only glimmer in the whole dull affair is + the fact that Betsy Kindred spends four days a week with us. Betsy and I + were in college together, and we do occasionally find something funny to + laugh about. + </p> + <p> + Yesterday we were having tea in my HIDEOUS parlor when we suddenly + determined to revolt against so much unnecessary ugliness. We called in + six sturdy and destructive orphans, a step-ladder, and a bucket of hot + water, and in two hours had every vestige of that tapestry paper off those + walls. You can't imagine what fun it is ripping paper off walls. + </p> + <p> + Two paperhangers are at work this moment hanging the best that our village + affords, while a German upholsterer is on his knees measuring my chairs + for chintz slip covers that will hide every inch of their plush + upholstery. + </p> + <p> + Please don't get nervous. This doesn't mean that I'm preparing to spend my + life in the asylum. It means only that I'm preparing a cheerful welcome + for my successor. I haven't dared tell Judy how dismal I find it, because + I don't want to cloud Florida; but when she returns to New York she will + find my official resignation waiting to meet her in the front hall. + </p> + <p> + I would write you a long letter in grateful payment for seven pages, but + two of my little dears are holding a fight under the window. I dash to + separate them. + </p> + <p> + Yours as ever, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + March 8. + </p> + <p> + My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I myself have bestowed a little present upon the John Grier Home—the + refurnishing of the superintendent's private parlor. I saw the first night + here that neither I nor any future occupant could be happy with Mrs. + Lippett's electric plush. You see, I am planning to make my successor + contented and willing to stay. + </p> + <p> + Betsy Kindred assisted in the rehabilitation of the Lippett's chamber of + horrors, and between us we have created a symphony in dull blue and gold. + Really and truly, it's one of the loveliest rooms you've ever seen. The + sight of it will be an artistic education to any orphan. New paper on the + wall, new rugs on the floor (my own prized Persians expressed from + Worcester by an expostulating family). New casement curtains at my three + windows, revealing a wide and charming view, hitherto hidden by Nottingham + lace. A new big table, some lamps and books and a picture or so, and a + real open fire. She had closed the fireplace because it let in air. + </p> + <p> + I never realized what a difference artistic surroundings make in the peace + of one's soul. I sat last night and watched my fire throw nice highlights + on my new old fender, and purred with contentment. And I assure you it's + the first purr that has come from this cat since she entered the gates of + the John Grier Home. + </p> + <p> + But the refurnishing of the superintendent's parlor is the slightest of + our needs. The children's private apartments demand so much basic + attention that I can't decide where to begin. That dark north playroom is + a shocking scandal, but no more shocking than our hideous dining room or + our unventilated dormitories or our tubless lavatories. + </p> + <p> + If the institution is very saving, do you think it can ever afford to burn + down this smelly old original building, and put up instead some nice, + ventilated modern cottages? I cannot contemplate that wonderful + institution at Hastings without being filled with envy. It would be some + fun to run an asylum if you had a plant like that to work with. But, + anyway, when you get back to New York and are ready to consult the + architect about remodeling, please apply to me for suggestions. Among + other little details I want two hundred feet of sleeping porch running + along the outside of our dormitories. + </p> + <p> + You see, it's this way: our physical examination reveals the fact that + about half of our children are aenemic—{aneamic}{anaemic} (Mercy! + what a word!), and a lot of them have tubercular ancestors, and more have + alcoholic. Their first need is oxygen rather than education. And if the + sickly ones need it, why wouldn't it be good for the well ones? I should + like to have every child, winter and summer, sleeping in the open air; but + I know that if I let fall such a bomb on the board of trustees, the whole + body would explode. + </p> + <p> + Speaking of trustees, I have met up with the Hon. Cyrus Wykoff, and I + really believe that I dislike him more than Dr. Robin MacRae or the + kindergarten teacher or the cook. I seem to have a genius for discovering + enemies! + </p> + <p> + Mr. Wykoff called on Wednesday last to look over the new superintendent. + </p> + <p> + Having lowered himself into my most comfortable armchair, he proceeded to + spend the day. He asked my father's business, and whether or not he was + well-to-do. I told him that my father manufactured overalls, and that, + even in these hard times, the demand for overalls was pretty steady. + </p> + <p> + He seemed relieved. He approves of the utilitarian aspect of overalls. He + had been afraid that I had come from the family of a minister or professor + or writer, a lot of high thinking and no common sense. Cyrus believes in + common sense. + </p> + <p> + And what had been my training for this position? + </p> + <p> + That, as you know, is a slightly embarrassing question. But I produced my + college education and a few lectures at the School of Philanthropy, also a + short residence in the college settlement (I didn't tell him that all I + had done there was to paint the back hall and stairs). Then I submitted + some social work among my father's employees and a few friendly visits to + the Home for Female Inebriates. + </p> + <p> + To all of which he grunted. + </p> + <p> + I added that I had lately made a study of the care of dependent children, + and casually mentioned my seventeen institutions. + </p> + <p> + He grunted again, and said he didn't take much stock in this new-fangled + scientific charity. + </p> + <p> + At this point Jane entered with a box of roses from the florist's. That + blessed Gordon Hallock sends me roses twice a week to brighten the rigors + of institution life. + </p> + <p> + Our trustee began an indignant investigation. He wished to know where I + got those flowers, and was visibly relieved when he learned that I had not + spent the institution's money for them. He next wished to know who Jane + might be. I had foreseen that question and decided to brazen it out. + </p> + <p> + "My maid," said I. + </p> + <p> + "Your what?" he bellowed, quite red in the face. + </p> + <p> + "My maid." + </p> + <p> + "What is she doing here?" + </p> + <p> + I amiably went into details. "She mends my clothes, blacks my boots, keeps + my bureau drawers in order, washes my hair." + </p> + <p> + I really thought the man would choke, so I charitably added that I paid + her wages out of my own private income, and paid five dollars and fifty + cents a week to the institution for her board; and that, though she was + big, she didn't eat much. + </p> + <p> + He allowed that I might make use of one of the orphans for all legitimate + service. + </p> + <p> + I explained—still polite, but growing bored—that Jane had been + in my service for many years, and was indispensable. + </p> + <p> + He finally took himself off, after telling me that he, for one, had never + found any fault with Mrs. Lippett. She was a common-sense Christian woman, + without many fancy ideas, but with plenty of good solid work in her. He + hoped that I would be wise enough to model my policy upon hers! + </p> + <p> + And what, my dear Judy, do you think of that? + </p> + <p> + The doctor dropped in a few minutes later, and I repeated the Hon. Cyrus's + conversation in detail. For the first time in the history of our + intercourse the doctor and I agreed. + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Lippett indeed!" he growled. "The blethering auld gomerel! May the + Lord send him mair sense!" + </p> + <p> + When our doctor really becomes aroused, he drops into Scotch. My latest + pet name for him (behind his back) is Sandy. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate is sitting on the floor as I write, untangling sewing-silks and + winding them neatly for Jane, who is becoming quite attached to the little + imp. + </p> + <p> + "I am writing to your Aunt Judy," say I to Sadie Kate. "What message shall + I send from you?" + </p> + <p> + "I never heard of no Aunt Judy." + </p> + <p> + "She is the aunt of every good little girl in this school." + </p> + <p> + "Tell her to come and visit me and bring some candy," says Sadie Kate. + </p> + <p> + I say so, too. + </p> + <p> + My love to the president, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + March 13. + </p> + <p> + MRS. JUDY ABBOTT PENDLETON, + </p> + <p> + Dear Madam: + </p> + <p> + Your four letters, two telegrams, and three checks are at hand, and your + instructions shall be obeyed just as quickly as this overworked + superintendent can manage it. + </p> + <p> + I delegated the dining room job to Betsy Kindred. One hundred dollars did + I allow her for the rehabilitation of that dreary apartment. She accepted + the trust, picked out five likely orphans to assist in the mechanical + details, and closed the door. + </p> + <p> + For three days the children have been eating from the desks in the + schoolroom. I haven't an idea what Betsy is doing; but she has a lot + better taste than I, so there isn't much use in interfering. + </p> + <p> + It is such a heaven-sent relief to be able to leave something to somebody + else, and be sure it will be carried out! With all due respect to the age + and experience of the staff I found here, they are not very open to new + ideas. As the John Grier Home was planned by its noble founder in 1875, so + shall it be run today. + </p> + <p> + Incidentally, my dear Judy, your idea of a private dining room for the + superintendent, which I, being a social soul, at first scorned, has been + my salvation. When I am dead tired I dine alone, but in my live intervals + I invite an officer to share the meal; and in the expansive intimacy of + the dinner-table I get in my most effective strokes. When it becomes + desirable to plant the seeds of fresh air in the soul of Miss Snaith, I + invite her to dinner, and tactfully sandwich in a little oxygen between + her slices of pressed veal. + </p> + <p> + Pressed veal is our cook's idea of an acceptable PIECE DE RESISTANCE for a + dinner party. In another month I am going to face the subject of suitable + nourishment for the executive staff. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile there are so many things more important than our own comfort + that we shall have to worry along on veal. + </p> + <p> + A terrible bumping has just occurred outside my door. One little cherub + seems to be kicking another little cherub downstairs. But I write on + undisturbed. If I am to spend my days among orphans, I must cultivate a + cheerful detachment. + </p> + <p> + Did you get Leonora Fenton's cards? She's marrying a medical missionary + and going to Siam to live! Did you ever hear of anything so absurd as + Leonora presiding over a missionary's menage? Do you suppose she will + entertain the heathen with skirt dances? + </p> + <p> + It isn't any absurder, though, than me in an orphan asylum, or you as a + conservative settled matron, or Marty Keene a social butterfly in Paris. + Do you suppose she goes to embassy balls in riding clothes, and what on + earth does she do about hair? It couldn't have grown so soon; she must + wear a wig. Isn't our class turning out some hilarious surprises? + </p> + <p> + The mail arrives. Excuse me while I read a nice fat letter from + Washington. + </p> + <p> + Not so nice; quite impertinent. Gordon can't get over the idea that it is + a joke, S. McB. in conjunction with one hundred and thirteen orphans. But + he wouldn't think it such a joke if he could try it for a few days. He + says he is going to drop off here on his next trip North and watch the + struggle. How would it be if I left him in charge while I dashed to New + York to accomplish some shopping? Our sheets are all worn out, and we + haven't more than two hundred and eleven blankets in the house. + </p> + <p> + Singapore, sole puppy of my heart and home, sends his respectful love. I + also, S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + <br /> + </p> + <p> + Friday. My dearest Judy: + </p> + <p> + You should see what your hundred dollars and Betsy Kindred did to that + dining room! + </p> + <p> + It's a dazzling dream of yellow paint. Being a north room, she thought to + brighten it; and she has. The walls are kalsomined buff, with a frieze of + little molly cottontails skurrying around the top. All of the woodwork—tables + and benches included—is a cheerful chrome yellow. Instead of + tablecloths, which we can't afford, we have linen runners, with stenciled + rabbits hopping along their length. Also yellow bowls, filled at present + with pussywillows, but looking forward to dandelions and cowslips and + buttercups. And new dishes, my dear—white, with yellow jonquils (we + think), though they may be roses; there is no botany expert in the house. + Most wonderful touch of all, we have NAPKINS, the first we have seen in + our whole lives. The children thought they were handkerchiefs and + ecstatically wiped their noses. + </p> + <p> + To honor the opening of the new room, we had ice-cream and cake for + dessert. It is such a pleasure to see these children anything but cowed + and apathetic, that I am offering prizes for boisterousness—to every + one but Sadie Kate. She drummed on the table with her knife and fork and + sang, "Welcome to dem golden halls." + </p> + <p> + You remember that illuminated text over the dining-room door—"The + Lord Will Provide." We've painted it out, and covered the spot with + rabbits. It's all very well to teach so easy a belief to normal children, + who have a proper family and roof behind them; but a person whose only + refuge in distress will be a park bench must learn a more militant creed + than that. + </p> + <p> + "The Lord has given you two hands and a brain and a big world to use them + in. Use them well, and you will be provided for; use them ill, and you + will want," is our motto, and that with reservations. + </p> + <p> + In the sorting process that has been going on I have got rid of eleven + children. That blessed State Charities Aid Association helped me dispose + of three little girls, all placed in very nice homes, and one to be + adopted legally if the family likes her. And the family will like her; I + saw to that. She was the prize child of the institution, obedient and + polite, with curly hair and affectionate ways, exactly the little girl + that every family needs. When a couple of adopting parents are choosing a + daughter, I stand by with my heart in my mouth, feeling as though I were + assisting in the inscrutable designs of Fate. Such a little thing turns + the balance! The child smiles, and a loving home is hers for life; she + sneezes, and it passes her by forever. + </p> + <p> + Three of our biggest boys have gone to work on farms, one of them out West + to a RANCH! Report has it that he is to become a cowboy and Indian fighter + and grizzly-bear hunter, though I believe in reality he is to engage in + the pastoral work of harvesting wheat. He marched off, a hero of romance, + followed by the wistful eyes of twenty-five adventurous lads, who turned + back with a sigh to the safely monotonous life of the J. G. H. + </p> + <p> + Five other children have been sent to their proper institutions. One of + them is deaf, one an epileptic, and the other three approaching idiocy. + None of them ought ever to have been accepted here. This as an educational + institution, and we can't waste our valuable plant in caring for + defectives. + </p> + <p> + Orphan asylums have gone out of style. What I am going to develop is a + boarding school for the physical, moral, and mental growth of children + whose parents have not been able to provide for their care. + </p> + <p> + "Orphans" is merely my generic term for the children; a good many of them + are not orphans in the least. They have one troublesome and tenacious + parent left who won't sign a surrender, so I can't place them out for + adoption. But those that are available would be far better off in loving + foster-homes than in the best institution that I can ever make. So I am + fitting them for adoption as quickly as possible, and searching for the + homes. + </p> + <p> + You ought to run across a lot of pleasant families in your travels; can't + you bully some of them into adopting children? Boys by preference. We've + got an awful lot of extra boys, and nobody wants them. Talk about + anti-feminism! It's nothing to the anti-masculinism that exists in the + breasts of adopting parents. I could place out a thousand dimpled little + girls with yellow hair, but a good live boy from nine to thirteen is a + drug on the market. There seems to be a general feeling that they track in + dirt and scratch up mahogany furniture. + </p> + <p> + Shouldn't you think that men's clubs might like to adopt boys, as a sort + of mascot? The boy could be boarded in a nice respectable family, and + drawn out by the different members on Saturday afternoons. They could take + him to ball games and the circus, and then return him when they had had + enough, just as you do with a library book. It would be very valuable + training for the bachelors. People are forever talking about the + desirability of training girls for motherhood. Why not institute a course + of training in fatherhood, and get the best men's clubs to take it up? + Will you please have Jervis agitate the matter at his various clubs, and + I'll have Gordon start the idea in Washington. They both belong to such a + lot of clubs that we ought to dispose of at least a dozen boys. + </p> + <p> + I remain, + </p> + <p> + The ever-distracted mother of 113. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + March 18. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I have been having a pleasant respite from the 113 cares of motherhood. + </p> + <p> + Yesterday who should drop down upon our peaceful village but Mr. Gordon + Hallock, on his way back to Washington to resume the cares of the nation. + At least he said it was on his way, but I notice from the map in the + primary room that it was one hundred miles out of his way. + </p> + <p> + And dear, but I was glad to see him! He is the first glimpse of the + outside world I have had since I was incarcerated in this asylum. And such + a lot of entertaining businesses he had to talk about! He knows the inside + of all the outside things you read in the newspapers; so far as I can make + out, he is the social center about which Washington revolves. I always + knew he would get on in politics, for he has a way with him; there's no + doubt about it. + </p> + <p> + You can't imagine how exhilarated and set-up I feel, as though I'd come + into my own again after a period of social ostracism. I must confess that + I get lonely for some one who talks my kind of nonsensical talk. Betsy + trots off home every week end, and the doctor is conversational enough, + but, oh, so horribly logical! Gordon somehow seems to stand for the life I + belong to,—of country clubs and motors and dancing and sport and + politeness,—a poor, foolish, silly life, if you will, but mine own. + And I have missed it. This serving society business is theoretically + admirable and compelling and interesting, but deadly stupid in its working + details. I am afraid I was never born to set the crooked straight. + </p> + <p> + I tried to show Gordon about and make him take an interest in the babies, + but he wouldn't glance at them. He thinks I came just to spite him, which, + of course, I did. Your siren call would never have lured me from the path + of frivolity had Gordon not been so unpleasantly hilarious at the idea of + my being able to manage an orphan asylum. I came here to show him that I + could; and now, when I can show him, the beast refuses to look. + </p> + <p> + I invited him to dinner, with a warning about the pressed veal; but he + said no, thanks, that I needed a change. So we went to Brantwood Inn and + had broiled lobster. I had positively forgotten that the creatures were + edible. + </p> + <p> + This morning at seven o'clock I was wakened by the furious ringing of the + telephone bell. It was Gordon at the station, about to resume his journey + to Washington. He was in quite a contrite mood about the asylum, and + apologized largely for refusing to look at my children. It was not that he + didn't like orphans, he said; it was just that he didn't like them in + juxtaposition to me. And to prove his good intentions, he would send them + a bag of peanuts. + </p> + <p> + I feel as fresh and revivified after my little fling as though I'd had a + real vacation. There's no doubt about it, an hour or so of exciting talk + is more of a tonic to me than a pint of iron and strychnine pills. + </p> + <p> + You owe me two letters, dear Madam. Pay them TOUT DE SUITE, or I lay down + my pen forever. + </p> + <p> + Yours, as usual, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + Tuesday, 5 P.M. My dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + I am told that during my absence this afternoon you paid us a call and dug + up a scandal. You claim that the children under Miss Snaith are not + receiving their due in the matter of cod-liver oil. + </p> + <p> + I am sorry if your medicinal orders have not been carried out, but you + must know that it is a difficult matter to introduce that abominably + smelling stuff into the inside of a squirming child. And poor Miss Snaith + is a very much overworked person. She has ten more children to care for + than should rightly fall into the lot of any single woman, and until we + find her another assistant, she has very little time for the fancy touches + you demand. + </p> + <p> + Also, my dear Enemy, she is very susceptible to abuse. When you feel in a + fighting mood, I wish you would expend your belligerence upon me. I don't + mind it; quite the contrary. But that poor lady has retired to her room in + a state of hysterics, leaving nine babies to be tucked into bed by + whomever it may concern. + </p> + <p> + If you have any powders that would be settling to her nerves, please send + them back by Sadie Kate. + </p> + <p> + Yours truly, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Wednesday Morning. + </p> + <p> + Dear Dr. MacRae: + </p> + <p> + I am not taking an unintelligent stand in the least; I am simply asking + that you come to me with all complaints, and not stir up my staff in any + such volcanic fashion as that of yesterday. + </p> + <p> + I endeavor to carry out all of your orders—of a medical nature—with + scrupulous care. In the present case there seems to have been some + negligence; I don't know what did become of those fourteen unadministered + bottles of cod-liver oil that you have made such a fuss about, but I shall + investigate. + </p> + <p> + And I cannot, for various reasons, pack off Miss Snaith in the summary + fashion you demand. She may be, in certain respects, inefficient; but she + is kind to the children, and with supervision will answer temporarily. + </p> + <p> + Yours truly, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Thursday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + SOYEZ TRANQUILLE. I have issued orders, and in the future the children + shall receive all of the cod-liver oil that by rights is theirs. A wilfu' + man maun hae his way. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + March 22. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Asylum life has looked up a trifle during the past few days—since + the great Cod-Liver Oil War has been raging. The first skirmish occurred + on Tuesday, and I unfortunately missed it, having accompanied four of my + children on a shopping trip to the village. I returned to find the asylum + teeming with hysterics. Our explosive doctor had paid us a visit. + </p> + <p> + Sandy has two passions in life: one is for cod-liver oil and the other for + spinach, neither popular in our nursery. Some time ago—before I + came, in fact—he had ordered cod-liver oil for all of the {aenemic}—Heavens! there's that word again! aneamic children, and + had given instructions as to its application to Miss Snaith. Yesterday, in + his suspicious Scotch fashion, he began nosing about to find out why the + poor little rats weren't fattening up as fast as he thought they ought, + and he unearthed a hideous scandal. They haven't received a whiff of + cod-liver oil for three whole weeks! At that point he exploded, and all + was joy and excitement and hysterics. + </p> + <p> + Betsy says that she had to send Sadie Kate to the laundry on an improvised + errand, as his language was not fit for orphan ears. By the time I got + home he had gone, and Miss Snaith had retired, weeping, to her room, and + the whereabouts of fourteen bottles of cod-liver oil was still + unexplained. He had accused her at the top of his voice of taking them + herself. Imagine Miss Snaith,—she who looks so innocent and chinless + and inoffensive—stealing cod-liver oil from these poor helpless + little orphans and guzzling it in private! + </p> + <p> + Her defense consisted in hysterical assertions that she loved the + children, and had done her duty as she saw it. She did not believe in + giving medicine to babies; she thought drugs bad for their poor little + stomachs. You can imagine Sandy! Oh, dear! oh, dear! To think I missed it! + </p> + <p> + Well, the tempest raged for three days, and Sadie Kate nearly ran her + little legs off carrying peppery messages back and forth between us and + the doctor. It is only under stress that I communicate with him by + telephone, as he has an interfering old termagant of a housekeeper who + "listens in" on the down-stairs switch. I don't wish the scandalous + secrets of the John Grier spread abroad. The doctor demanded Miss Snaith's + instant dismissal, and I refused. Of course she is a vague, unfocused, + inefficient old thing, but she does love the children, and with proper + supervision is fairly useful. + </p> + <p> + At least, in the light of her exalted family connections, I can't pack her + off in disgrace like a drunken cook. I am hoping in time to eliminate her + by a process of delicate suggestion; perhaps I can make her feel that her + health requires a winter in California. And also, no matter what the + doctor wants, so positive and dictatorial is his manner that just out of + self-respect one must take the other side. When he states that the world + is round, I instantly assert it to be triangular. + </p> + <p> + Finally, after three pleasantly exhilarating days, the whole business + settled itself. An apology (a very dilute one) was extracted from him for + being so unkind to the poor lady, and full confession, with promises for + the future, was drawn from her. It seems that she couldn't bear to make + the little dears take the stuff, but, for obvious reasons, she couldn't + bear to cross Dr. MacRae, so she hid the last fourteen bottles in a dark + corner of the cellar. Just how she was planning to dispose of her loot I + don't know. Can you pawn cod-liver oil? + </p> + <p> + LATER. + </p> + <p> + Peace negotiations had just ended this afternoon, and Sandy had made a + dignified exit, when the Hon. Cyrus Wykoff was announced. Two enemies in + the course of an hour are really too much! + </p> + <p> + The Hon. Cy was awfully impressed with the new dining room, especially + when he heard that Betsy had put on those rabbits with her own lily-white + hands. Stenciling rabbits on walls, he allows, is a fitting pursuit for a + woman, but an executive position like mine is a trifle out of her sphere. + He thinks it would be far wiser if Mr. Pendleton did not give me such free + scope in the spending of his money. + </p> + <p> + While we were still contemplating Betsy's mural flight, an awful crash + came from the pantry, and we found Gladiola Murphy weeping among the ruins + of five yellow plates. It is sufficiently shattering to my nerves to hear + these crashes when I am alone, but it is peculiarly shattering when + receiving a call from an unsympathetic trustee. + </p> + <p> + I shall cherish that set of dishes to the best of my ability, but if you + wish to see your gift in all its uncracked beauty, I should advise you to + hurry North, and visit the John Grier Home without delay. + </p> + <p> + Yours as ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + March 26. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I have just been holding an interview with a woman who wants to take a + baby home to surprise her husband. I had a hard time convincing her that, + since he is to support the child, it might be a delicate attention to + consult him about its adoption. She argued stubbornly that it was none of + his business, seeing that the onerous work of washing and dressing and + training would fall upon her. I am really beginning to feel sorry for men. + Some of them seem to have very few rights. + </p> + <p> + Even our pugnacious doctor I suspect of being a victim of domestic + tyranny, and his housekeeper's at that. It is scandalous the way Maggie + McGurk neglects the poor man. I have had to put him in charge of an + orphan. Sadie Kate, with a very housewifely air, is this moment sitting + cross-legged on the hearth rug sewing buttons on his overcoat while he is + upstairs tending babies. + </p> + <p> + You would never believe it, but Sandy and I are growing quite confidential + in a dour Scotch fashion. It has become his habit, when homeward bound + after his professional calls, to chug up to our door about four in the + afternoon, and make the rounds of the house to make sure that we are not + developing cholera morbus or infanticide or anything catching, and then + present himself at four-thirty at my library door to talk over our mutual + problems. + </p> + <p> + Does he come to see me? Oh, no, indeed; he comes to get tea and toast and + marmalade. The man hath a lean and hungry look. His housekeeper doesn't + feed him enough. As soon as I get the upper hand of him a little more, I + am going to urge him on to revolt. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile he is very grateful for something to eat, but oh, so funny in + his attempts at social grace! At first he would hold a cup of tea in one + hand, a plate of muffins in the other, and then search blankly for a third + hand to eat them with. Now he has solved the problem. He turns in his toes + and brings his knees together; then he folds his napkin into a long, + narrow wedge that fills the crack between them, thus forming a very + workable pseudo lap; after that he sits with tense muscles until the tea + is drunk. I suppose I ought to provide a table, but the spectacle of Sandy + with his toes turned in is the one gleam of amusement that my day affords. + </p> + <p> + The postman is just driving in with, I trust, a letter from you. Letters + make a very interesting break in the monotony of asylum life. If you wish + to keep this superintendent contented, you'd better write often. + </p> + <p> + . . . . . . . . + </p> + <p> + Mail received and contents noted. + </p> + <p> + Kindly convey my thanks to Jervis for three alligators in a swamp. He + shows rare artistic taste in the selection of his post cards. Your + seven-page illustrated letter from Miami arrives at the same time. I + should have known Jervis from the palm tree perfectly, even without the + label, as the tree has so much the more hair of the two. Also, I have a + polite bread-and-butter letter from my nice young man in Washington, and a + book from him, likewise a box of candy. The bag of peanuts for the kiddies + he has shipped by express. Did you ever know such assiduity? + </p> + <p> + Jimmie favors me with the news that he is coming to visit me as soon as + father can spare him from the factory. The poor boy does hate that factory + so! It isn't that he is lazy; he just simply isn't interested in overalls. + But father can't understand such a lack of taste. Having built up the + factory, he of course has developed a passion for overalls, which should + have been inherited by his eldest son. I find it awfully convenient to + have been born a daughter; I am not asked to like overalls, but am left + free to follow any morbid career I may choose, such as this. + </p> + <p> + To return to my mail: There arrives an advertisement from a wholesale + grocer, saying that he has exceptionally economical brands of oatmeal, + rice, flour, prunes, and dried apples that he packs specially for prisons + and charitable institutions. Sounds nutritious, doesn't it? + </p> + <p> + I also have letters from a couple of farmers, each of whom would like to + have a strong, husky boy of fourteen who is not afraid of work, their + object being to give him a good home. These good homes appear with great + frequency just as the spring planting is coming on. When we investigated + one of them last week, the village minister, in answer to our usual + question, "Does he own any property?" replied in a very guarded manner, "I + think he must own a corkscrew." + </p> + <p> + You would hardly credit some of the homes that we have investigated. We + found a very prosperous country family the other day, who lived huddled + together in three rooms in order to keep the rest of their handsome house + clean. The fourteen-year girl they wished to adopt, by way of a cheap + servant, was to sleep in the same tiny room with their own three children. + Their kitchen-dining-parlor apartment was more cluttered up and unaired + than any city tenement I ever saw, and the thermometer at eighty-four. One + could scarcely say they were living there; they were rather COOKING. You + may be sure they got no girl from us! + </p> + <p> + I have made one invariable rule—every other is flexible. No child is + to be placed out unless the proposed family can offer better advantages + than we can give. I mean than we are going to be able to give in the + course of a few months, when we get ourselves made over into a model + institution. I shall have to confess that at present we are still pretty + bad. + </p> + <p> + But anyway, I am very CHOOSEY in regard to homes, and I reject + three-fourths of those that offer. + </p> + <p> + LATER. + </p> + <p> + Gordon has made honorable amends to my children. His bag of peanuts is + here, made of burlap and three feet high. + </p> + <p> + Do you remember the dessert of peanuts and maple sugar they used to give + us at college? We turned up our noses, but ate. I am instituting it here, + and I assure you we don't turn up our noses. It is a pleasure to feed + children who have graduated from a course of Mrs. Lippett; they are + pathetically grateful for small blessings. + </p> + <p> + You can't complain that this letter is too short. + </p> + <p> + Yours, + </p> + <p> + On the verge of writer's cramp, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Off and on, all day Friday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + You will be interested to hear that I have encountered another enemy—the + doctor's housekeeper. I had talked to the creature several times over the + telephone, and had noted that her voice was not distinguished by the soft, + low accents that mark the caste of "Vere de Vere"; but now I have seen + her. This morning, while returning from the village, I made a slight + detour, and passed our doctor's house. Sandy is evidently the result of + environment—olive green, with a mansard roof and the shades pulled + down. You would think he had just been holding a funeral. + </p> + <p> + I don't wonder that the amenities of life have somewhat escaped the poor + man. After studying the outside of his house, I was filled with curiosity + to see if the inside matched. + </p> + <p> + Having sneezed five times before breakfast this morning, I decided to go + in and consult him professionally. To be sure, he is a children's + specialist, but sneezes are common to all ages. So I boldly marched up the + steps and rang the bell. + </p> + <p> + Hark! What sound is that that breaks upon our revelry? The Hon. Cy's + voice, as I live, approaching up the stairs. I've letters to write, and I + can't be tormented by his blether, so I am rushing Jane to the door with + orders to look him firmly in the eye and tell him I am out. + </p> + <p> + . . . . . . . . + </p> + <p> + On with the dance! Let joy be unconfined. He's gone. + </p> + <p> + But those eight stars represent eight agonizing minutes spent in the dark + of my library closet. The Hon. Cy received Jane's communication with the + affable statement that he would sit down and wait. Whereupon he entered + and sat. But did Jane leave me to languish in the closet? No; she enticed + him to the nursery to see the AWFUL thing that Sadie Kate has done. The + Hon. Cy loves to see awful things, particularly when done by Sadie Kate. I + haven't an idea what scandal Jane is about to disclose; but no matter, he + has gone. + </p> + <p> + Where was I? Oh, yes; I had rung the doctor's bell. + </p> + <p> + The door was opened by a large, husky person with her sleeves rolled up. + She looked very businesslike, with a hawk's nose and cold gray eyes. + </p> + <p> + "Well?" said she, her tone implying that I was a vacuum-cleaning agent. + </p> + <p> + "Good morning." I smiled affably, and stepped inside. "Is this Mrs. + McGurk?" + </p> + <p> + "It is," said she. "An' ye'll be the new young woman in the orphan + asylum?" + </p> + <p> + "I am that," said I. "Is himself at home?" + </p> + <p> + "He is not," said she. + </p> + <p> + "But this is his office hour." + </p> + <p> + "He don't keep it regular'." + </p> + <p> + "He ought," said I, sternly. "Kindly tell him that Miss McBride called to + consult him, and ask him to look in at the John Grier Home this + afternoon." + </p> + <p> + "Ump'!" grunted Mrs. McGurk, and closed the door so promptly that she shut + in the hem of my skirt. + </p> + <p> + When I told the doctor this afternoon, he shrugged his shoulders, and + observed that that was Maggie's gracious way. + </p> + <p> + "And why do you put up with Maggie?" said I. + </p> + <p> + "And where would I find any one better?" said he. "Doing the work for a + lone man who comes as irregularly to meals as a twenty-four-hour day will + permit is no sinecure. She furnishes little sunshine in the home, but she + does manage to produce a hot dinner at nine o'clock at night." + </p> + <p> + Just the same, I am willing to wager that her hot dinners are neither + delicious nor well served. She's an inefficient, lazy old termagant, and I + know why she doesn't like me. She imagines that I want to steal away the + doctor and oust her from a comfortable position, something of a joke, + considering. But I am not undeceiving her; it will do the old thing good + to worry a little. She may cook him better dinners, and fatten him up a + trifle. I understand that fat men are good-natured. + </p> + <p> + TEN O'CLOCK. + </p> + <p> + I don't know what silly stuff I have been writing to you off and on all + day, between interruptions. It has got to be night at last, and I am too + tired to do so much as hold up my head. Your song tells the sad truth, + "There is no joy in life but sleep." + </p> + <p> + I bid you good night. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + Isn't the English language absurd? Look at those forty monosyllables in a + row! + </p> + <p> + J. G. H., + </p> + <p> + April 1. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I have placed out Isador Gutschneider. His new mother is a Swedish woman, + fat and smiling, with blue eyes and yellow hair. She chose him out of the + whole nurseryful of children because he was the brunettest baby there. She + has always loved brunettes, but in her most ambitious dreams has never + hoped to have one of her own. His name is going to be changed to Oscar + Carlson, after his new dead uncle. + </p> + <p> + My first trustees' meeting is to occur next Wednesday. I confess that I am + not looking forward to it with impatience—especially as an inaugural + address by me will be its chief feature. I wish our president were here to + back me up! But at least I am sure of one thing. I am never going to adopt + the Uriah Heepish attitude toward trustees that characterized Mrs. + Lippett's manners. I shall treat "first Wednesdays" as a pleasant social + diversion, my day at home, when the friends of the asylum gather for + discussion and relaxation; and I shall endeavor not to let our pleasures + discommode the orphans. You see how I have taken to heart the unhappy + experiences of that little Jerusha. + </p> + <p> + Your last letter has arrived, and no suggestion in it of traveling North. + Isn't it about time that you were turning your faces back toward Fifth + Avenue? Hame is hame, be 't ever sae hamely. Don't you marvel at the + Scotch that flows so readily from my pen? Since being acquent' wi' Sandy, + I hae gathered a muckle new vocabulary. The dinner gong! I leave you, to + devote a revivifying half-hour to mutton hash. We eat to live in the John + Grier Home. + </p> + <p> + SIX O'CLOCK. + </p> + <p> + The Hon. Cy has been calling again. He drops in with great frequency, + hoping to catch me IN DELICTU. How I do not like that man! He is a pink, + fat, puffy old thing, with a pink, fat, puffy soul. I was in a very + cheery, optimistic frame of mind before his arrival, but now I shall do + nothing but grumble for the rest of the day. + </p> + <p> + He deplores all of the useless innovations that I am endeavoring to + introduce, such as a cheerful playroom, prettier clothes, baths, and + better food and fresh air and play and fun and ice-cream and kisses. He + says that I will unfit these children to occupy the position in life that + God has called them to occupy. + </p> + <p> + At that my Irish blood came to the surface, and I told him that if God had + planned to make all of these 113 little children into useless, ignorant, + unhappy citizens, I was going to fool God! That we weren't educating them + out of their class in the least. We were educating them INTO their natural + class much more effectually than is done in the average family. We weren't + trying to force them into college if they hadn't any brains, as happens + with rich men's sons; and we weren't putting them to work at fourteen if + they were naturally ambitious, as happens with poor men's sons. We were + watching them closely and individually and discovering their level. If our + children showed an aptitude to become farm laborers and nurse-maids, we + were going to teach them to be the best possible farm laborers and + nurse-maids; and if they showed a tendency to become lawyers, we would + turn them into honest, intelligent, open-minded lawyers. (He's a lawyer + himself, but certainly not an open-minded one.) + </p> + <p> + He grunted when I had finished my remarks, and stirred his tea vigorously. + Whereupon I suggested that perhaps he needed another lump of sugar, and + dropped it in, and left him to absorb it. + </p> + <p> + The only way to deal with trustees is with a firm and steady hand. You + have to keep them in their places. + </p> + <p> + Oh, my dear! that smudge in the corner was caused by Singapore's black + tongue. He is trying to send you an affectionate kiss. Poor Sing thinks + he's a lap dog—isn't it a tragedy when people mistake their + vocations? I myself am not always certain that I was born an orphan asylum + superintendent. + </p> + <p> + Yours, til deth, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + SUPERINTENDENT'S OFFICE, JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + April 4. + </p> + <p> + THE PENDLETON FAMILY, + </p> + <p> + Palm Beach, Florida. + </p> + <p> + Dear Sir and Madam: + </p> + <p> + I have weathered my first visitors' day, and made the trustees a beautiful + speech. Everybody said it was a beautiful speech—even my enemies. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Gordon Hallock's recent visit was exceptionally opportune; I gleaned + from him many suggestions as to how to carry an audience. + </p> + <p> + "Be funny."—I told about Sadie Kate and a few other cherubs that you + don't know. + </p> + <p> + "Keep it concrete and fitted to the intelligence of your audience."—I + watched the Hon. Cy, and never said a thing that he couldn't understand. + </p> + <p> + "Flatter your hearers."—I hinted delicately that all of these new + reforms were due to the wisdom and initiative of our peerless trustees. + </p> + <p> + "Give it a high moral tone, with a dash of pathos."—I dwelt upon the + parentless condition of these little wards of Society. And it was very + affecting—my enemy wiped away a tear! + </p> + <p> + Then I fed them up on chocolate and whipped cream and lemonade and tartar + sandwiches, and sent them home, expansive and beaming, but without any + appetite for dinner. + </p> + <p> + I dwell thus at length upon our triumph, in order to create in you a happy + frame of mind, before passing to the higeous calamity that so nearly + wrecked the occasion. + </p> + +<p class="poem"> +"Now follows the dim horror of my tale,<br/> +And I feel I'm growing gradually pale,<br/> +Â Â Â Â For, even at this day,<br/> +Â Â Â Â Though its smell has passed away,<br/> +When I venture to remember it, I quail!" +</p> + <p> + You never heard of our little Tammas Kehoe, did you? I simply haven't + featured Tammas because he requires so much ink and time and vocabulary. + He's a spirited lad, and he follows his dad, a mighty hunter of old—that + sounds like more Bab Ballads, but it isn't; I made it up as I went along. + </p> + <p> + We can't break Tammas of his inherited predatory instincts. He shoots the + chickens with bows and arrows and lassoes the pigs and plays bull-fight + with the cows—and oh, is very destructive! But his crowning villainy + occurred an hour before the trustees' meeting, when we wanted to be so + clean and sweet and engaging. + </p> + <p> + It seems that he had stolen the rat trap from the oat bin, and had set it + up in the wood lot, and yesterday morning was so fortunate as to catch a + fine big skunk. + </p> + <p> + Singapore was the first to report the discovery. He returned to the house + and rolled on the rugs in a frenzy of remorse over his part of the + business. While our attention was occupied with Sing, Tammas was busily + skinning his prey in the seclusion of the woodshed. He buttoned the pelt + inside his jacket, conveyed it by a devious route through the length of + this building, and concealed it under his bed where he thought it wouldn't + be found. + </p> + <p> + Then he went—per schedule—to the basement to help freeze the + ice-cream for our guests. You notice that we omitted ice-cream from the + menu. + </p> + <p> + In the short time that remained we created all the counter-irritation that + was possible. Noah (negro furnace man) started smudge fires at intervals + about the grounds. Cook waved a shovelful of burning coffee through the + house. Betsy sprinkled the corridors with ammonia. Miss Snaith daintily + treated the rugs with violet water. I sent an emergency call to the doctor + who came and mixed a gigantic solution of chlorid of lime. But still, + above and beneath and through every other odor, the unlaid ghost of + Tammas's victim cried for vengeance. + </p> + <p> + The first business that came up at the meeting, was whether we should dig + a hole and bury, not only Tammas, but the whole main building. You can see + with what finesse I carried off the shocking event, when I tell you that + the Hon. Cy went home chuckling over a funny story, instead of grumbling + at the new superintendent's inability to manage boys. + </p> + <p> + We've our ain bit weird to dree! + </p> + <p> + As ever, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Friday, likewise Saturday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Singapore is still living in the carriage house, and receiving a daily + carbolic-scented bath from Tammas Kehoe. I am hoping that some day, in the + distant future, my darling will be fit to return. + </p> + <p> + You will be pleased to hear that I have instituted a new method of + spending your money. We are henceforth to buy a part of our shoes and + drygoods and drug store comestibles from local shops, at not quite such + low prices as the wholesale jobbers give, but still at a discount, and the + education that is being thrown in is worth the difference. The reason is + this: I have made the discovery that half of my children know nothing of + money or its purchasing power. They think that shoes and corn meal and + red-flannel petticoats and mutton stew and gingham shirts just float down + from the blue sky. + </p> + <p> + Last week I dropped a new green dollar bill out of my purse, and an + eight-year-old urchin picked it up and asked if he could keep that picture + of a bird. (American eagle in the center.) That child had never seen a + bill in his life! I began an investigation, and discovered that dozens of + children in this asylum have never bought anything or have ever seen + anybody buy anything. And we are planning to turn them out at sixteen into + a world governed entirely by the purchasing power of dollars and cents! + Good heavens! just think of it! They are not to lead sheltered lives with + somebody eternally looking after them; they have got to know how to get + the very most they can out of every penny they can manage to earn. + </p> + <p> + I pondered the question all one night, at intervals, and went to the + village at nine o'clock the next morning. I held conferences with seven + storekeepers; found four open-minded and helpful, two doubtful, and one + actively stupid. I have started with the four—drygoods, groceries, + shoes, and stationery. In return for somewhat large orders from us, they + are to turn themselves and their clerks into teachers for my children, who + are to go to the stores, inspect the stocks, and do their own purchasing + with real money. + </p> + <p> + For example, Jane needs a spool of blue sewing-silk and a yard of elastic; + so two little girls, intrusted with a silver quarter, trot hand in hand to + Mr. Meeker's. They match the silk with anxious care, and watch the clerk + jealously while he measures the elastic, to make sure that he doesn't + stretch it. Then they bring back six cents change, receive my thanks and + praise, and retire to the ranks tingling with a sense of achievement. + </p> + <p> + Isn't it pathetic? Ordinary children of ten or twelve automatically know + so many things that our little incubator chicks have never dreamed of. But + I have a variety of plans on foot. Just give me time, and you will see. + One of these days I'll be turning out some nearly normal youngsters. + </p> + <p> + LATER. + </p> + <p> + I've an empty evening ahead, so I'll settle to some further gossip with + you. + </p> + <p> + You remember the peanuts that Gordon Hallock sent? Well, I was so gracious + when I thanked him that it incited him to fresh effort. He apparently went + into a toy shop, and placed himself unreservedly in the hands of an + enterprising clerk. Yesterday two husky expressmen deposited in our front + hall a crate full of expensive furry animals built to be consumed by the + children of the rich. They are not exactly what I should have purchased + had I been the one to disburse such a fortune, but my babies find them + very huggable. The chicks are now taking to bed with them lions and + elephants and bears and giraffes. I don't know what the psychological + effect will be. Do you suppose when they grow up they will all join the + circus? + </p> + <p> + Oh, dear me, here is Miss Snaith, coming to pay a social call. + </p> + <p> + Good-by. + </p> + <p> + S. + </p> + <p> + P.S. The prodigal has returned. He sends his respectful regards, and three + wags of the tail. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + April 7. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I have just been reading a pamphlet on manual training for girls, and + another on the proper diet for institutions—right proportions of + proteins, fats, starches, etc. In these days of scientific charity, when + every problem has been tabulated, you can run an institution by chart. I + don't see how Mrs. Lippett could have made all the mistakes she did, + assuming, of course,that she knew how to read. But there is one quite + important branch of institutional work that has not been touched upon, and + I myself am gathering data. Some day I shall issue a pamphlet on the + "Management and Control of Trustees." + </p> + <p> + I must tell you the joke about my enemy—not the Hon. Cy, but my + first, my original enemy. He has undertaken a new field of endeavor. He + says quite soberly (everything he does is sober; he has never smiled yet) + that he has been watching me closely since my arrival, and though I am + untrained and foolish and flippant (sic), he doesn't think that I am + really so superficial as I at first appeared. I have an almost masculine + ability of grasping the whole of a question and going straight to the + point. + </p> + <p> + Aren't men funny? When they want to pay you the greatest compliment in + their power, they naively tell you that you have a masculine mind. There + is one compliment, incidentally, that I shall never be paying him. I + cannot honestly say that he has a quickness of perception almost feminine. + </p> + <p> + So, though Sandy quite plainly sees my faults, still, he thinks that some + of them may be corrected; and he has determined to carry on my education + from the point where the college dropped it. A person in my position ought + to be well read in physiology, biology, psychology, sociology, and + eugenics; she should know the hereditary effects of insanity, idiocy, and + alcohol; should be able to administer the Binet test; and should + understand the nervous system of a frog. In pursuance whereof, he has + placed at my disposal his own scientific library of four thousand volumes. + He not only fetches in the books he wants me to read, but comes and asks + questions to make sure I haven't skipped. + </p> + <p> + We devoted last week to the life and letters of the Jukes family. + Margaret, the mother of criminals, six generations ago, founded a prolific + line, and her progeny, mostly in jail, now numbers some twelve hundred. + Moral: watch the children with a bad heredity so carefully that none of + them can ever have any excuse for growing up into Jukeses. + </p> + <p> + So now, as soon as we have finished our tea, Sandy and I get out the + Doomsday Book, and pore over its pages in an anxious search for alcoholic + parents. It's a cheerful little game to while away the twilight hour after + the day's work is done. + </p> + <p> + QUELLE VIE! Come home fast and take me out of it. I'm wearying for the + sight of you. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. J. G. H., + </p> + <p> + Thursday morning. My dear Pendleton Family: + </p> + <p> + I have received your letter, and I seize my pen to stop you. I don't wish + to be relieved. I take it back. I change my mind. The person you are + planning to send sounds like an exact twin of Miss Snaith. How can you ask + me to turn over my darling children to a kind, but ineffectual, + middle-aged lady without any chin? The very thought of it wrings a + mother's heart. + </p> + <p> + Do you imagine that such a woman can carry on this work even temporarily? + No! The manager of an institution like this has got to be young and husky + and energetic and forceful and efficient and red-haired and + sweet-tempered, like me. Of course I've been discontented,—anybody + would be with things in such a mess,—but it's what you socialists + call a holy discontent. And do you think that I am going to abandon all of + the beautiful reforms I have so painstakingly started? No! I am not to be + moved from this spot until you find a superintendent superior to Sallie + McBride. + </p> + <p> + That does not mean, though, that I am mortgaging myself forever. Just for + the present, until things get on their feet. While the face washing, + airing, reconstructing period lasts, I honestly believe you chose the + right person when you hit upon me. I LOVE to plan improvements and order + people about. + </p> + <p> + This is an awfully messy letter, but I'm dashing it off in three minutes + in order to catch you before you definitely engage that pleasant, + inefficient middle-aged person without a chin. + </p> + <p> + Please, kind lady and gentleman, don't do me out of me job! Let me stay a + few months longer. Just gimme a chance to show what I'm good for, and I + promise you won't never regret it. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + J. G. H., + </p> + <p> + Thursday afternoon. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I've composed a poem—a paean of victory. + </p> + <p> + Robin MacRae Smiled today. + </p> + <p> + It's the truth! S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + April 13. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I am gratified to learn that you were gratified to learn that I am going + to stay. I hadn't realized it, but I am really getting sort of attached to + orphans. + </p> + <p> + It's an awful disappointment that Jervis has business which will keep you + South so much longer. I am bursting with talk, and it is such a laborious + nuisance having to write everything I want to say. + </p> + <p> + Of course I am glad that we are to have the building remodeled, and I + think all of your ideas good, but I have a few extra good ones myself. It + will be nice to have the new gymnasium and sleeping-porches, but, oh, my + soul does long for cottages! The more I look into the internal workings of + an orphan asylum, the more I realize that the only type of asylum that can + compete with a private family is one on the cottage system. So long as the + family is the unit of society, children should be hardened early to family + life. + </p> + <p> + The problem that is keeping me awake at present is, What to do with the + children while we are being made over? It is hard to live in a house and + build it at the same time. How would it be if I rented a circus tent and + pitched it on the lawn? + </p> + <p> + Also, when we plunge into our alterations, I want a few guest rooms where + our children can come back when ill or out of work. The great secret of + our lasting influence in their lives will be our watchful care afterward. + What a terrible ALONE feeling it must give a person not to have a family + hovering in the background! With all my dozens of aunts and uncles and + mothers and fathers and cousins and brothers and sisters, I can't + visualize it. I'd be terrified and panting if I didn't have lots of cover + to run to. And for these forlorn little mites, somehow or other the John + Grier Home must supply their need. So, dear people, send me half a dozen + guest rooms, if you please. + </p> + <p> + Good-by, and I'm glad you didn't put in the other woman. The very + suggestion of somebody else taking over my own beautiful reforms before + they were even started, stirred up all the opposition in me. I'm afraid + I'm like Sandy—I canna think aught is dune richt except my ain hand + is in 't. + </p> + <p> + Yours, for the present, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Sunday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + I know that I haven't written lately; you have a perfect right to grumble, + but oh dear! oh dear! you can't imagine what a busy person an orphan + asylum superintendent is. And all the writing energy I possess has to be + expended upon that voracious Judy Abbott Pendleton. If three days go by + without a letter she telegraphs to know if the asylum has burned; whereas, + if you—nice man—go letterless, you simply send us a present to + remind us of your existence. So, you see, it's distinctly to our advantage + to slight you often. + </p> + <p> + You will probably be annoyed when I tell you that I have promised to stay + on here. They finally did find a woman to take my place, but she wasn't at + all the right type and would have answered only temporarily. And, my dear + Gordon, it's true, when I faced saying good-by to this feverish planning + and activity, Worcester somehow looked rather colorless. I couldn't bear + to let my asylum go unless I was sure of substituting a life packed + equally full of sensation. + </p> + <p> + I know the alternative you will suggest, but please don't—just now. + I told you before that I must have a few months longer to make up my mind. + And in the meantime I like the feeling that I'm of use in the world. + There's something constructive and optimistic about working with children; + that is, if you look at it from my cheerful point of view, and not from + our Scotch doctor's. I've never seen anybody like that man; he's always + pessimistic and morbid and down. It's best not to be too intelligent about + insanity and dipsomania and all the other hereditary details. I am just + about ignorant enough to be light-hearted and effective in a place like + this. + </p> + <p> + The thought of all of these little lives expanding in every direction + eternally thrills me. There are so many possibilities in our child garden + for every kind of flower. It has been planted rather promiscuously, to be + sure, but though we undoubtedly shall gather a number of weeds, we are + also hoping for some rare and beautiful blossoms. Am I not growing + sentimental? It is due to hunger—and there goes the dinner-gong! We + are going to have a delicious meal: roast beef and creamed carrots and + beet greens, with rhubarb pie for dessert. Would you not like to dine with + me? I should love to have you. + </p> + <p> + Most cordially yours, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + P.S. You should see the number of poor homeless cats that these children + want to adopt. We had four when I came, and they have all had kittens + since. I haven't taken an exact census, but I think the institution + possesses nineteen. + </p> + <p> + April 15. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + You'd like to make another slight donation to the J. G. H. out of the + excess of last month's allowance? BENE! Will you kindly have the following + inserted in all low-class metropolitan dailies: + </p> + +<p class="center"> + Notice!<br/> + To Parents Planning to Abandon their Children:<br/> + Please do it before they have reached their third year. +</p> + <p> + I can't think of any action on the part of abandoning parents that would + help us more effectually. This having to root up evil before you begin + planting good is slow, discouraging work. + </p> + <p> + We have one child here who has almost floored me; but I WILL NOT + acknowledge myself beaten by a child of five. He alternates between sullen + moroseness, when he won't speak a word, and the most violent outbursts of + temper, when he smashes everything within reach. He has been here only + three months, and in that time he has destroyed nearly every piece of + bric-a-brac in the institution—not, by the way, a great loss to art. + </p> + <p> + A month or so before I came he pulled the tablecloth from the officers' + table while the girl in charge was in the corridor sounding the gong. The + soup had already been served. You can imagine the mess! Mrs. Lippett half + killed the child on that occasion, but the killing did nothing to lessen + the temper, which was handed on to me intact. + </p> + <p> + His father was Italian and his mother Irish; he has red hair and freckles + from County Cork and the most beautiful brown eyes that ever came out of + Naples. After the father was stabbed in a fight and the mother had died of + alcoholism, the poor little chap by some chance or other got to us. I + suspect that he belongs in the Catholic Protectory. As for his manners—oh + dear! oh dear! They are what you would expect. He kicks and bites and + swears. I have dubbed him Punch. + </p> + <p> + Yesterday he was brought squirming and howling to my office, charged with + having knocked down a little girl and robbed her of her doll. Miss Snaith + plumped him into a chair behind me, and left him to grow quiet, while I + went on with my writing. I was suddenly startled by an awful crash. He had + pushed that big green jardiniere off the window-sill and broken it into + five hundred pieces. I jumped with a suddenness that swept the ink-bottle + to the floor, and when Punch saw that second catastrophe, he stopped + roaring with rage and threw back his head and roared with laughter. The + child is DIABOLICAL. + </p> + <p> + I have determined to try a new method of discipline that I don't believe + in the whole of his forlorn little life he has ever experienced. I am + going to see what praise and encouragement and love will do. So, instead + of scolding him about the jardiniere, I assumed that it was an accident. I + kissed him and told him not to feel bad; that I didn't mind in the least. + It shocked him into being quiet; he simply held his breath and stared + while I wiped away his tears and sopped up the ink. + </p> + <p> + The child just now is the biggest problem that the J. G. H. affords. He + needs the most patient, loving, individual care—a proper mother and + father, likewise some brothers and sisters and a grandmother. But I can't + place him in a respectable family until I make over his language and his + propensity to break things. I separated him from the other children, and + kept him in my room all the morning, Jane having removed to safe heights + all destructible OBJETS D'ART. Fortunately, he loves to draw, and he sat + on a rug for two hours, and occupied himself with colored pencils. He was + so surprised when I showed an interest in a red-and-green ferryboat, with + a yellow flag floating from the mast, that he became quite profanely + affable. Until then I couldn't get a word out of him. + </p> + <p> + In the afternoon Dr. MacRae dropped in and admired the ferryboat, while + Punch swelled with the pride of creation. Then, as a reward for being such + a good little boy, the doctor took him out in his automobile on a visit to + a country patient. + </p> + <p> + Punch was restored to the fold at five o'clock by a sadder and wiser + doctor. At a sedate country estate he had stoned the chickens, smashed a + cold frame, and swung the pet Angora cat by its tail. Then when the sweet + old lady tried to make him be kind to poor pussy, he told her to go to + hell. + </p> + <p> + I can't bear to consider what some of these children have seen and + experienced. It will take years of sunshine and happiness and love to + eradicate the dreadful memories that they have stored up in the far-back + corners of their little brains. And there are so many children and so few + of us that we can't hug them enough; we simply haven't arms or laps to go + around. + </p> + <p> + MAIS PARLONS D'AUTRES CHOSES! Those awful questions of heredity and + environment that the doctor broods over so constantly are getting into my + blood, too; and it's a vicious habit. If a person is to be of any use in a + place like this, she must see nothing but good in the world. Optimism is + the only wear for a social worker. + </p> + <p> + "'Tis the middle of night by the castle clock"—do you know where + that beautiful line of poetry comes from? "Cristabel," of English K. + Mercy! how I hated that course! You, being an English shark, liked it; but + I never understood a word that was said from the time I entered the + classroom till I left it. However, the remark with which I opened this + paragraph is true. It IS the middle of night by the mantelpiece clock, so + I'll wish you pleasant dreams. ADDIO! + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Tuesday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + You doctored the whole house, then stalked past my library with your nose + in the air, while I was waiting tea with a plate of Scotch scones sitting + on the trivet, ordered expressly for you as a peace-offering. + </p> + <p> + If you are really hurt, I will read the Kallikak book; but I must tell you + that you are working me to death. It takes almost all of my energy to be + an effective superintendent, and this university extension course that you + are conducting I find wearing. You remember how indignant you were one day + last week because I confessed to having stayed up until one o'clock the + night before? Well, my dear man, if I were to accomplish all the vicarious + reading you require, I should sit up until morning every night. + </p> + <p> + However, bring it in. I usually manage half an hour of recreation after + dinner, and though I had wanted to glance at Wells's latest novel, I will + amuse myself instead with your feeble-minded family. + </p> + <p> + Life of late is unco steep. Obligingly yours, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + April 17. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + Thank you for the tulips, likewise the lilies of the valley. They are most + becoming to my blue Persian bowls. + </p> + <p> + Have you ever heard of the Kallikaks? Get the book and read them up. They + are a two-branch family in New Jersey, I think, though their real name and + origin is artfully concealed. But, anyway,—and this is true,—six + generations ago a young gentleman, called for convenience Martin Kallikak, + got drunk one night and temporarily eloped with a feeble-minded barmaid, + thus founding a long line of feeble-minded Kallikaks,—drunkards, + gamblers, prostitutes, horse thieves,—a scourge to New Jersey and + surrounding States. + </p> + <p> + Martin later straightened up, married a normal woman, and founded a second + line of proper Kallikaks,—judges, doctors, farmers, professors, + politicians,—a credit to their country. And there the two branches + still are, flourishing side by side. You can see what a blessing it would + have been to New Jersey if something drastic had happened to that + feeble-minded barmaid in her infancy. + </p> + <p> + It seems that feeblemindedness is a very hereditary quality, and science + isn't able to overcome it. No operation has been discovered for + introducing brains into the head of a child who didn't start with them. + And the child grows up with, say, a nine-year brain in a thirty-year body, + and becomes an easy tool for any criminal he meets. Our prisons are + one-third full of feeble-minded convicts. Society ought to segregate them + on feeble-minded farms, where they can earn their livings in peaceful + menial pursuits, and not have children. Then in a generation or so we + might be able to wipe them out. + </p> + <p> + Did you know all that? It's very necessary information for a politician to + have. Get the book and read it, please; I'd send my copy only that it's + borrowed. + </p> + <p> + It's also very necessary information for me to have. There are eleven of + these chicks that I suspect a bit, and I am SURE of Loretta Higgins. I + have been trying for a month to introduce one or two basic ideas into that + child's brain, and now I know what the trouble is: her head is filled with + a sort of soft cheesy substance instead of brain. + </p> + <p> + I came up here to make over this asylum in such little details as fresh + air and food and clothes and sunshine, but, heavens! you can see what + problems I am facing. I've got to make over society first, so that it + won't send me sub-normal children to work with. Excuse all this excited + conversation; but I've just met up with the subject of feeble-mindedness, + and it's appalling—and interesting. It is your business as a + legislator to make laws that will remove it from the world. Please attend + to this immediately, And oblige, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE, + </p> + <p> + Sup't John Grier Home. + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Man of Science: + </p> + <p> + You didn't come today. Please don't skip us tomorrow. I have finished the + Kallikak family and I am bursting with talk. Don't you think we ought to + have a psychologist examine these children? + </p> + <p> + We owe it to adopting parents not to saddle them with feeble-minded + offspring. + </p> + <p> + You know, I'm tempted to ask you to prescribe arsenic for Loretta's cold. + I've diagnosed her case; she's a Kallikak. Is it right to let her grow up + and found a line of 378 feeble-minded people for society to care for? Oh + dear! I do hate to poison the child, but what can I do? + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + You aren't interested in feeble-minded people, and you are shocked because + I am? Well, I am equally shocked because you are not. If you aren't + interested in everything of the sort that there unfortunately is in this + world, how can you make wise laws? + </p> + <p> + You can't. + </p> + <p> + However, at your request, I will converse upon a less morbid subject. I've + just bought fifty yards of blue and rose and green and corn-colored + hair-ribbon as an Easter present for my fifty little daughters. I am also + thinking of sending you an Easter present. How would a nice fluffy little + kitten please you? I can offer any of the following patterns:— + </p> + <p> + Number 3 comes in any color, gray, black, or yellow. If you will let me + know which you would rather have, I will express it at once. + </p> + <p> + I would write a respectable letter, but it's teatime, and I see that a + guest approaches. + </p> + <p> + ADDIO! SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Don't you know some one who would like to adopt a desirable baby boy + with seventeen nice new teeth? + </p> + <p> + April 20. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + One a penny, two a penny, hot cross buns! We've had a Good Friday present + of ten dozen, given by Mrs. De Peyster Lambert, a high church, + stained-glass-window soul whom I met at a tea a few days ago. (Who says + now that teas are a silly waste of time?) She asked me about my "precious + little waifs," and said I was doing a noble work and would be rewarded. I + saw buns in her eye, and sat down and talked to her for half an hour. + </p> + <p> + Now I shall go and thank her in person, and tell her with a great deal of + affecting detail how much those buns were appreciated by my precious + little waifs—omitting the account of how precious little Punch threw + his bun at Miss Snaith and plastered her neatly in the eye. I think, with + encouragement, Mrs. De Peyster Lambert can be developed into a cheerful + giver. + </p> + <p> + Oh, I'm growing into the most shocking beggar! My family don't dare to + visit me, because I demand BAKSHISH in such a brazen manner. I threatened + to remove father from my calling list unless he shipped immediately + sixty-five pairs of overalls for my prospective gardeners. A notice from + the freight office this morning asks me to remove two packing cases + consigned to them by the J. L. McBride Co. of Worcester; so I take it that + father desires to continue my acquaintance. Jimmie hasn't sent us anything + yet, and he's getting a huge salary. I write him frequently a pathetic + list of our needs. + </p> + <p> + But Gordon Hallock has learned the way to a mother's heart. I was so + pleasant about the peanuts and menagerie that now he sends a present of + some sort every few days, and I spend my entire time composing thank-you + letters that aren't exact copies of the ones I've sent before. Last week + we received a dozen big scarlet balls. The nursery is FULL of them; you + kick them before you as you walk. And yesterday there arrived a + half-bushel of frogs and ducks and fishes to float in the bathtubs. + </p> + <p> + Send, O best of trustees, the tubs in which to float them! + </p> + <p> + I am, as usual, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Tuesday. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Spring must be lurking about somewhere; the birds are arriving from the + South. Isn't it time you followed their example? + </p> + <p> + Society note from the BIRD O' PASSAGE NEWS: + </p> + <p> + "Mr. and Mrs. First Robin have returned from a trip to Florida. It is + hoped that Mr. and Mrs. Jervis Pendleton will arrive shortly." + </p> + <p> + Even up here in our dilatory Dutchess County the breeze smells green. It + makes you want to be out and away, roaming the hills, or else down on your + knees grubbing in the dirt. Isn't it funny what farmering instincts the + budding spring awakens in even the most urban souls? + </p> + <p> + I have spent the morning making plans for little private gardens for every + child over nine. The big potato field is doomed. That is the only feasible + spot for sixty-two private gardens. It is near enough to be watched from + the north windows, and yet far enough away, so that their messing will not + injure our highly prized landscape lawn. Also the earth is rich, and they + have some chance of success. I don't want the poor little chicks to + scratch all summer, and then not turn up any treasure in the end. In order + to furnish an incentive, I shall announce that the institution will buy + their produce and pay in real money, though I foresee we shall be buried + under a mountain of radishes. + </p> + <p> + I do so want to develop self-reliance and initiative in these children, + two sturdy qualities in which they are conspicuously lacking (with the + exception of Sadie Kate and a few other bad ones). Children who have + spirit enough to be bad I consider very hopeful. It's those who are good + just from inertia that are discouraging. + </p> + <p> + The last few days have been spent mainly in charming the devil out of + Punch, an interesting task if I could devote my whole time to it. But with + one hundred and seven other little devils to charm away, my attention is + sorely deflected. + </p> + <p> + The awful thing about this life is that whatever I am doing, the other + things that I am not doing, but ought to be, keep tugging at my skirts. + There is no doubt but Punch's personal devil needs the whole attention of + a whole person,—preferably two persons,—so that they could + spell each other and get some rest. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate has just flown in from the nursery with news of a scarlet + goldfish (Gordon's gift) swallowed by one of our babies. Mercy! the number + of calamities that can occur in an orphan asylum! + </p> + <p> + 9 P.M. + </p> + <p> + My children are in bed, and I've just had a thought. Wouldn't it be + heavenly if the hibernating system prevailed among the human young? There + would be some pleasure in running an asylum if one could just tuck the + little darlings into bed the first of October and keep them there until + the twenty-second of April. + </p> + <p> + I'm yours, as ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + April 24. + </p> + <p> + Dear Jervis Pendleton, Esq.: + </p> + <p> + This is to supplement a night telegram which I sent you ten minutes ago. + Fifty words not being enough to convey any idea of my emotions, I herewith + add a thousand. + </p> + <p> + As you will know by the time you receive this, I have discharged the + farmer, and he has refused to be discharged. Being twice the size of me, I + can't lug him to the gate and chuck him out. He wants a notification from + the president of the board of trustees written in vigorous language on + official paper in typewriting. So, dear president of the board of + trustees, kindly supply all of this at your earliest convenience. + </p> + <p> + Here follows the history of the case: + </p> + <p> + The winter season still being with us when I arrived and farming + activities at a low ebb, I have heretofore paid little attention to Robert + Sterry except to note on two occasions that his pigpens needed cleaning; + but today I sent for him to come and consult with me in regard to spring + planting. + </p> + <p> + Sterry came, as requested, and seated himself at ease in my office with + his hat upon his head. I suggested as tactfully as might be that he remove + it, an entirely necessary request, as little orphan boys were in and out + on errands, and "hats off in the house" is our first rule in masculine + deportment. + </p> + <p> + Sterry complied with my request, and stiffened himself to be against + whatever I might desire. + </p> + <p> + I proceeded to the subject in hand, namely, that the diet of the John + Grier Home in the year to come is to consist less exclusively of potatoes. + At which our farmer grunted in the manner of the Hon. Cyrus Wykoff, only + it was a less ethereal and gentlemanly grunt than a trustee permits + himself. I enumerated corn and beans and onions and peas and tomatoes and + beets and carrots and turnips as desirable substitutes. + </p> + <p> + Sterry observed that if potatoes and cabbages was good enough for him, he + guessed they was good enough for charity children. + </p> + <p> + I proceeded imperturbably to say that the two-acre potato field was to be + plowed and fertilized, and laid out into sixty individual gardens, the + boys assisting in the work. + </p> + <p> + At that Sterry exploded. The two-acre field was the most fertile and + valuable piece of earth on the whole place. He guessed if I was to break + that up into play gardens for the children to mess about in, I'd be + hearing about it pretty danged quick from the board of trustees. That + field was fitted for potatoes, it had always raised potatoes, and it was + going to continue to raise them just as long as he had anything to say + about it. + </p> + <p> + "You have nothing whatever to say about it," I amiably replied. "I have + decided that the two-acre field is the best plot to use for the children's + gardens, and you and the potatoes will have to give way." + </p> + <p> + Whereupon he rose in a storm of bucolic wrath, and said he'd be gol darned + if he'd have a lot of these danged city brats interfering with his work. + </p> + <p> + I explained—very calmly for a red-haired person with Irish forebears—that + this place was run for the exclusive benefit of these children; that the + children were not here to be exploited for the benefit of the place, a + philosophy which he did not grasp, though my fancy city language had a + slightly dampening effect. I added that what I required in a farmer was + the ability and patience to instruct the boys in gardening and simple + outdoor work; that I wished a man of large sympathies whose example would + be an inspiring influence to these children of the city streets. + </p> + <p> + Sterry, pacing about like a caged woodchuck, launched into a tirade about + silly Sunday-school notions, and, by a transition which I did not grasp, + passed to a review of the general subject of woman's suffrage. I gathered + that he is not in favor of the movement. I let him argue himself quiet, + then I handed him a check for his wages, and told him to vacate the tenant + house by twelve o'clock next Wednesday. + </p> + <p> + Sterry says he'll be danged if he will. (Excuse so many DANGEDS. It is the + creature's only adjective.) He was engaged to work for this institution by + the president of the board of trustees, and he will not move from that + house until the president of the board of trustees tells him to go. I + don't think poor Sterry realizes that since his arrival a new president + has come to the throne. + </p> + <p> + ALORS you have the story. I make no threats, but Sterry or McBride—take + your choice, dear sir. + </p> + <p> + I am also about to write to the head of the Massachusetts Agricultural + College, at Amherst, asking him to recommend a good, practical man with a + nice, efficient, cheerful wife, who will take the entire care of our + modest domain of seventeen acres, and who will be a man with the right + personality to place over our boys. + </p> + <p> + If we get the farming end of this institution into running shape, it ought + to furnish not only beans and onions for the table, but education for our + hands and brains. + </p> + <p> + I remain, sir, Yours most truly, S. McBRIDE, Superintendent of the John + Grier Home. + </p> + <p> + P.S. I think that Sterry will probably come back some night and throw + rocks through the windows. Shall I have them insured? + </p> + <p> + My dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + You disappeared so quickly this afternoon that I had no chance to thank + you, but the echoes of that discharge penetrated as far as my library. + Also, I have viewed the debris. What on earth did you do to poor Sterry? + Watching the purposeful set of your shoulders as you strode toward the + carriage house, I was filled with sudden compunction. I did not want the + man murdered, merely reasoned with. I am afraid you were a little harsh. + </p> + <p> + However, your technic seems to have been effective. Report says that he + has telephoned for a moving wagon and that Mrs. Sterry is even now on her + hands and knees ripping up the parlor carpet. + </p> + <p> + For this relief much thanks. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + April 26. + </p> + <p> + Dear Jervis: + </p> + <p> + Your vigorous telegram was, after all, not needed. Dr. Robin MacRae, who + is a grand PAWKY mon when it comes to a fight, accomplished the business + with beautiful directness. I was so bubbling with rage that immediately + after writing to you I called up the doctor on the telephone, and + rehearsed the whole business over again. Now, our Sandy, whatever his + failings (and he has them), does have an uncommon supply of common sense. + He knows how useful those gardens are going to be, and how worse than + useless Sterry was. Also says he, "The superintendent's authority must be + upheld." (That, incidentally, is beautiful, coming from him.) But anyway, + those were his words. And he hung up the receiver, cranked up his car, and + flew up here at lawless speed. He marched straight to Sterry, impelled by + a fine Scotch rage, and he discharged the man with such vigor and + precision, that the carriage house window was shattered to fragments. + </p> + <p> + Since this morning at eleven, when Sterry's wagonload of furniture rumbled + out of the gates, a sweet peace has reigned over the J. G. H. A man from + the village is helping us out while we hopefully await the farmer of our + dreams. + </p> + <p> + I am sorry to have troubled you with our troubles. Tell Judy that she owes + me a letter, and won't hear from me until she has paid it. Your ob'd't + servant, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + In my letter of yesterday to Jervis I forgotted (Punch's word) to convey + to you our thanks for three tin bathtubs. The skyblue tub with poppies on + the side adds a particularly bright note to the nursery. I do love + presents for the babies that are too big to be swallowed. + </p> + <p> + You will be pleased to hear that our manual training is well under way. + The carpenter benches are being installed in the old primary room, and + until our schoolhouse gets its new addition, our primary class is meeting + on the front porch, in accordance with Miss Matthew's able suggestion. + </p> + <p> + The girls' sewing classes are also in progress. A circle of benches under + the copper beech tree accommodates the hand sewers, while the big girls + take turns at our three machines. Just as soon as they gain some + proficiency we will begin the glorious work of redressing the institution. + I know you think I'm slow, but it's really a task to accomplish one + hundred and eighty new frocks. And the girls will appreciate them so much + more if they do the work themselves. + </p> + <p> + I may also report that our hygiene system has risen to a high level. Dr. + MacRae has introduced morning and evening exercises, and a glass of milk + and a game of tag in the middle of school hours. He has instituted a + physiology class, and has separated the children into small groups, so + that they may come to his house, where he has a manikin that comes apart + and shows all its messy insides. They can now rattle off scientific truths + about their little digestions as fluently as Mother Goose rhymes. We are + really becoming too intelligent for recognition. You would never guess + that we were orphans to hear us talk; we are quite like Boston children. + </p> + <p> + 2 P.M. + </p> + <p> + O Judy, such a calamity! Do you remember several weeks ago I told you + about placing out a nice little girl in a nice family home where I hoped + she would be adopted? It was a kind Christian family living in a pleasant + country village, the foster-father a deacon in the church. Hattie was a + sweet, obedient, housewifely little body, and it looked as though we had + exactly fitted them to each other. My dear, she was returned this morning + for STEALING. Scandal piled on scandal: SHE HAD STOLEN A COMMUNION CUP + FROM CHURCH! + </p> + <p> + Between her sobs and their accusations it took me half an hour to gather + the truth. It seems that the church they attend is very modern and + hygienic, like our doctor, and has introduced individual communion cups. + Poor little Hattie had never heard of communion in her life. In fact, she + wasn't very used to church, Sunday-school having always sufficed for her + simple religious needs. But in her new home she attended both, and one + day, to her pleased surprise, they served refreshments. But they skipped + her. She made no comment, however; she is used to being skipped. + </p> + <p> + But as they were starting home she saw that the little silver cup had been + casually left in the seat, and supposing that it was a souvenir that you + could take if you wished, she put it into her pocket. + </p> + <p> + It came to light two days later as the most treasured ornament of her + doll's-house. It seems that Hattie long ago saw a set of doll's dishes in + a toy shop window, and has ever since dreamed of possessing a set of her + own. The communion cup was not quite the same, but it answered. Now, if + our family had only had a little less religion and a little more sense, + they would have returned the cup, perfectly unharmed, and have marched + Hattie to the nearest toy shop and bought her some dishes. But instead, + they bundled the child and her belongings into the first train they could + catch, and shoved her in at our front door, proclaiming loudly that she + was a thief. + </p> + <p> + I am pleased to say that I gave that indignant deacon and his wife such a + thorough scolding as I am sure they have never listened to from the + pulpit. I borrowed some vigorous bits from Sandy's vocabulary, and sent + them home quite humbled. As for poor little Hattie, here she is back + again, after going out with such high hopes. It has an awfully bad moral + effect on a child to be returned to the asylum in disgrace, especially + when she wasn't aware of committing a crime. It gives her a feeling that + the world is full of unknown pitfalls, and makes her afraid to take a + step. I must bend all my energies now toward finding another set of + parents for her, and ones that haven't grown so old and settled and good + that they have entirely forgotten their own childhood. + </p> + <p> + Sunday. + </p> + <p> + I forgot to tell you that our new farmer is here, Turnfelt by name; and + his wife is a love, yellow hair and dimples. If she were an orphan, I + could place her in a minute. We can't let her go to waste. I have a + beautiful plan of building an addition to the farmer's cottage, and + establishing under her comfortable care a sort of brooding-house where we + can place our new little chicks, to make sure they haven't anything + contagious and to eliminate as much profanity as possible before turning + them loose among our other perfect chicks. + </p> + <p> + How does that strike you? It is very necessary in an institution as full + of noise and movement and stir as this to have some isolated spot where we + can put cases needing individual attention. Some of our children have + inherited nerves, and a period of quiet contemplation is indicated. Isn't + my vocabulary professional and scientific? Daily intercourse with Dr. + Robin MacRae is extremely educational. + </p> + <p> + Since Turnfelt came, you should see our pigs. They are so clean and pink + and unnatural that they don't recognize one another any more as they pass. + </p> + <p> + Our potato field is also unrecognizable. It has been divided with string + and pegs into as many squares as a checker-board, and every child has + staked out a claim. Seed catalogues form our only reading matter. + </p> + <p> + Noah has just returned from a trip to the village for the Sunday papers to + amuse his leisure. Noah is a very cultivated person; he not only reads + perfectly, but he wears tortoise-shell-rimmed spectacles while he does it. + He also brought from the post office a letter from you, written Friday + night. I am pained to note that you do not care for "Gosta Berling" and + that Jervis doesn't. The only comment I can make is, "What a shocking lack + of literary taste in the Pendleton family!" + </p> + <p> + Dr. MacRae has another doctor visiting him, a very melancholy gentleman + who is at the head of a private psychopathic institution, and thinks + there's no good in life. But I suppose this pessimistic view is natural if + you eat three meals a day with a tableful of melancholics. He goes up and + down the world looking for signs of degeneracy, and finds them everywhere. + I expected, after half an hour's conversation, that he would ask to look + down my throat to see if I had a cleft palate. Sandy's taste in friends + seems to resemble his taste in literature. Gracious! this is a letter! + </p> + <p> + Good-by. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Thursday, May 2. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Such a bewildering whirl of events! The J. G. H. is breathless. + Incidentally, I am on the way toward solving my problem of what to do with + the children while the carpenters and plumbers and masons are here. Or, + rather, my precious brother has solved it for me. + </p> + <p> + This afternoon I went over my linen supply, and made the shocking + discovery that we have only sheets enough to change the children's beds + every two weeks, which, it appears, is our shiftless custom. While I was + still in the midst of my household gear, with a bunch of keys at my + girdle, looking like the chatelaine of a medieval chateau, who should be + ushered in but Jimmie? + </p> + <p> + Being extremely occupied, I dropped a slanting kiss on his nose, and sent + him off to look over the place in charge of my two oldest urchins. They + collected six friends and organized a baseball game. Jimmie came back + blown, but enthusiastic, and consented to prolong his visit over the week + end, though after the dinner I gave him he has decided to take his future + meals at the hotel. As we sat with our coffee before the fire, I confided + to him my anxiety as to what should be done with the chicks while their + new brooder is building. You know Jimmie. In one half a minute his plan + was formulated. + </p> + <p> + "Build an Adirondack camp on that little plateau up by the wood lot. You + can make three open shacks, each holding eight bunks, and move the + twenty-four oldest boys out there for the summer. It won't cost two + cents." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," I objected, "but it will cost more than two cents to engage a man + to look after them." + </p> + <p> + "Perfectly easy," said Jimmie, grandly. "I'll find you a college fellow + who'll be glad to come during the vacation for his board and a mere + pittance, only you'll have to set up more filling board than you gave me + tonight." + </p> + <p> + Dr. MacRae dropped in about nine o'clock, after visiting the hospital + ward. We've got three cases of whooping cough, but all isolated, and no + more coming. How those three got in is a mystery. It seems there is a + little bird that brings whooping cough to orphan asylums. + </p> + <p> + Jimmie fell upon him for backing in his camp scheme, and the doctor gave + it enthusiastically. They seized pencil and paper and drew up plans. And + before the evening was over, the last nail was hammered. Nothing would + satisfy those two men but to go to the telephone at ten o'clock and rouse + a poor carpenter from his sleep. He and some lumber are ordered for eight + in the morning. + </p> + <p> + I finally got rid of them at ten-thirty, still talking uprights and joists + and drainage and roof slants. + </p> + <p> + The excitement of Jimmie and coffee and all these building operations + induced me to sit down immediately and write a letter to you; but I think, + by your leave, I'll postpone further details to another time. Yours ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Saturday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + Will you be after dining with us at seven tonight? It's a real dinner + party; we're going to have ice-cream. + </p> + <p> + My brother has discovered a promising young man to take charge of the + boys,—maybe you know him,—Mr. Witherspoon, at the bank. I wish + to introduce him to asylum circles by easy steps, so PLEASE don't mention + insanity or epilepsy or alcoholism or any of your other favorite topics. + </p> + <p> + He is a gay young society leader, used to very fancy things to eat. Do you + suppose we can ever make him happy at the John Grier Home? Yours in + evident haste, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Sunday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Jimmie was back at eight Friday morning, and the doctor at a quarter past. + They and the carpenter and our new farmer and Noah and our two horses and + our eight biggest boys have been working ever since. Never were building + operations set going in faster time. I wish I had a dozen Jimmies on the + place, though I will say that my brother works faster if you catch him + before the first edge of his enthusiasm wears away. He would not be much + good at chiseling out a medieval cathedral. + </p> + <p> + He came back Saturday morning aglow with a new idea. He had met at the + hotel the night before a friend who belongs to his hunting club in Canada, + and who is cashier of our First (and only) National Bank. + </p> + <p> + "He's a bully good sport," said Jimmie, "and exactly the man you want to + camp out with those kids and lick 'em into shape. He'll be willing to come + for his board and forty dollars a month, because he's engaged to a girl in + Detroit and wants to save. I told him the food was rotten, but if he + kicked enough, you'd probably get a new cook." + </p> + <p> + "What's his name?" said I, with guarded interest. + </p> + <p> + "He's got a peach of a name. It's Percy de Forest Witherspoon." + </p> + <p> + I nearly had hysterics. Imagine a Percy de Forest Witherspoon in charge of + those twenty-four wild little savages! + </p> + <p> + But you know Jimmie when he has an idea. He had already invited Mr. + Witherspoon to dine with me on Saturday evening, and had ordered oysters + and squabs and ice-cream from the village caterer to help out my veal. It + ended by my giving a very formal dinner party, with Miss Matthews and + Betsy and the doctor included. + </p> + <p> + I almost asked the Hon. Cy and Miss Snaith. Ever since I have known those + two, I have felt that there ought to be a romance between them. Never have + I known two people who matched so perfectly. He's a widower with five + children. Don't you suppose it might be arranged? If he had a wife to take + up his attention, it might deflect him a little from us. I'd be getting + rid of them both at one stroke. It's to be considered among our future + improvements. + </p> + <p> + Anyway, we had our dinner. And during the course of the evening my anxiety + grew, not as to whether Percy would do for us, but as to whether we should + do for Percy. If I searched the world over, I never could find a young man + more calculated to win the affection of those boys. You know, just by + looking at him, that he does everything well, at least everything + vigorous. His literary and artistic accomplishments I suspect a bit, but + he rides and shoots and plays golf and football and sails a boat. He likes + to sleep out of doors and he likes boys. He has always wanted to know some + orphans; often read about 'em in books, he says, but never met any face to + face. Percy does seem too good to be true. + </p> + <p> + Before they left, Jimmie and the doctor hunted up a lantern, and in their + evening clothes conducted Mr. Witherspoon across a plowed field to inspect + his future dwelling. + </p> + <p> + And such a Sunday as we passed! I had absolutely to forbid their + carpentering. Those men would have put in a full day, quite irrespective + of the damage done to one hundred and four little moral natures. As it is, + they have just stood and looked at those shacks and handled their hammers, + and thought about where they would drive the first nail tomorrow morning. + The more I study men, the more I realize that they are nothing in the + world but boys grown too big to be spankable. + </p> + <p> + I am awfully worried as to how to feed Mr. Witherspoon. He looks as though + he had a frightfully healthy appetite, and he looks as though he couldn't + swallow his dinner unless he had on evening clothes. I've made Betsy send + home for a trunkful of evening gowns in order to keep up our social + standing. One thing is fortunate: he takes his luncheon at the hotel, and + I hear their luncheons are very filling. + </p> + <p> + Tell Jervis I am sorry he is not with us to drive a nail for the camp. + Here comes the Hon. Cy up the path. Heaven save us! + </p> + <p> + Ever your unfortunate, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + May 8. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Our camp is finished, our energetic brother has gone, and our twenty-four + boys have passed two healthful nights in the open. The three bark-covered + shacks add a pleasant rustic touch to the grounds. They are like those we + used to have in the Adirondacks, closed on three sides and open in the + front, and one larger than the rest to allow a private pavilion for Mr. + Percy Witherspoon. An adjacent hut, less exposed to the weather, affords + extremely adequate bathing facilities, consisting of a faucet in the wall + and three watering-cans. Each camp has a bath master who stands on a stool + and sprinkles each little shiverer as he trots under. Since our trustees + WON'T give us enough bathtubs, we have to use our wits. + </p> + <p> + The three camps have organized into three tribes of Indians, each with a + chief of its own to answer for its conduct, Mr. Witherspoon high chief of + all, and Dr. MacRae the medicine man. They dedicated their lodges Tuesday + evening with appropriate tribal ceremonies. And though they politely + invited me to attend, I decided that it was a purely masculine affair, so + I declined to go, but sent refreshments, a very popular move. Betsy and I + walked as far as the baseball field in the course of the evening, and + caught a glimpse of the orgies. The braves were squatting in a circle + about a big fire, each decorated with a blanket from his bed and a rakish + band of feathers. (Our chickens seem very scant as to tail, but I have + asked no unpleasant questions.) The doctor, with a Navajo blanket about + his shoulders, was executing a war dance, while Jimmie and Mr. Witherspoon + beat on war drums—two of our copper kettles, now permanently dented. + Fancy Sandy! It's the first youthful glimmer I have ever caught in the + man. + </p> + <p> + After ten o'clock, when the braves were safely stowed for the night, the + three men came in and limply dropped into comfortable chairs in my + library, with the air of having made martyrs of themselves in the great + cause of charity. But they did not deceive me. They originated all that + tomfoolery for their own individual delectation. + </p> + <p> + So far Mr. Percy Witherspoon appears fairly happy. He is presiding at one + end of the officers' table under the special protection of Betsy, and I am + told that he instills considerable life into that sedate assemblage. I + have endeavored to run up their menu a trifle, and he accepts what is put + before him with a perfectly good appetite, irrespective of the absence of + such accustomed trifles as oysters and quail and soft-shell crabs. + </p> + <p> + There was no sign of a private sitting room that I could put at this young + man's disposal, but he himself has solved the difficulty by proposing to + occupy our new laboratory. So he spends his evenings with a book and a + pipe, comfortably stretched in the dentist's chair. There are not many + society men who would be willing to spend their evenings so harmlessly. + That girl in Detroit is a lucky young thing. + </p> + <p> + Mercy! An automobile full of people has just arrived to look over the + institution, and Betsy, who usually does the honors, not here. I fly. + </p> + <p> + ADDIO! SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + My dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + This is not a letter,—I don't owe you one,—it's a receipt for + sixty-five pairs of roller skates. + </p> + <p> + Many thanks. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + I hear that I missed a call today, but Jane delivered your message, + together with the "Genetic Philosophy of Education." She says that you + will call in a few days for my opinion of the book. Is it to be a written + or an oral examination? + </p> + <p> + And doesn't it ever occur to you that this education business is rather + one-sided? It often strikes me that Dr. Robin MacRae's mental attitude + would also be the better for some slight refurbishing. I will promise to + read your book, provided you read one of mine. I am sending herewith the + "Dolly Dialogues," and shall ask for an opinion in a day or so. + </p> + <p> + It's uphill work making a Scotch Presbyterian frivolous, but persistency + accomplishes wonders. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + May 12. My dear, dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Talk about floods in Ohio! Right here in Dutchess County we are the + consistency of a wet sponge. Rain for five days, and everything wrong with + this institution. + </p> + <p> + The babies have had croup, and we have been up o' nights with them. Cook + has given notice, and there's a dead rat in the walls. Our three camps + leaked, and in the early dawn, after the first cloudburst, twenty-four + bedraggled little Indians, wrapped in damp bedding, came shivering to the + door and begged for admission. Since then every clothesline, every + stair-railing has been covered with wet and smelly blankets that steam, + but won't dry. Mr. Percy de Forest Witherspoon has returned to the hotel + to wait until the sun comes out. + </p> + <p> + After being cooped up for four days with no exercise to speak of, the + children's badness is breaking out in red spots, like the measles. Betsy + and I have thought of every form of active and innocent occupation that + could be carried on in such a congested quarter as this: blind man's buff + and pillow fights and hide-and-go-seek, gymnastics in the dining room, and + bean-bags in the school room. (We broke two windows.) The boys played + leapfrog up and down the hall, and jarred all the plaster in the building. + We have cleaned energetically and furiously. All the woodwork has been + washed, and all of the floors polished. But despite everything, we have a + great deal of energy left, and we are getting to that point of nerves + where we want to punch one another. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate has been acting like a little deil—do they have feminine + deils? If not, Sadie Kate has originated the species. And this afternoon + Loretta Higgins had—well, I don't know whether it was a sort of fit + or just a temper. She lay down on the floor and howled for a solid hour, + and when any one tried to approach her, she thrashed about like a little + windmill and bit and kicked. + </p> + <p> + By the time the doctor came she had pretty well worn herself out. He + picked her up, limp and drooping, and carried her to a cot in the hospital + room; and after she was asleep he came down to my library and asked to + look at the archives. + </p> + <p> + Loretta is thirteen; in the three years she has been here she has had five + of these outbreaks, and has been punished good and hard for them. The + child's ancestral record is simple: "Mother died of alcoholic dementia, + Bloomingdale Asylum. Father unknown." + </p> + <p> + He studied the page long and frowningly and shook his head. + </p> + <p> + "With a heredity like that, is it right to punish the child for having a + shattered nervous system?" + </p> + <p> + "It is not," said I, firmly. "We will mend her shattered nervous system." + </p> + <p> + "If we can." + </p> + <p> + "We'll feed her up on cod-liver oil and sunshine, and find a nice kind + foster mother who will take pity on the poor little—" + </p> + <p> + But then my voice trailed off into nothing as I pictured Loretta's face, + with her hollow eyes and big nose and open mouth and no chin and stringy + hair and sticking-out ears. No foster mother in the world would love a + child who looked like that. + </p> + <p> + "Why, oh, why," I wailed, "doesn't the good Lord send orphan children with + blue eyes and curly hair and loving dispositions? I could place a million + of that sort in kind homes, but no one wants Loretta." + </p> + <p> + "I'm afraid the good Lord doesn't have anything to do with bringing our + Lorettas into the world. It is the devil who attends to them." + </p> + <p> + Poor Sandy! He gets awfully pessimistic about the future of the universe; + but I don't wonder, with such a cheerless life as he leads. He looked + today as though his own nervous system was shattered. He had been + splashing about in the rain since five this morning, when he was called to + a sick baby case. I made him sit down and have some tea, and we had a + nice, cheerful talk on drunkenness and idiocy and epilepsy and insanity. + He dislikes alcoholic parents, but he ties himself into a knot over insane + parents. + </p> + <p> + Privately, I don't believe there's one thing in heredity, provided you + snatch the babies away before their eyes are opened. + </p> + <p> + We've got the sunniest youngster here you ever saw; his mother and Aunt + Ruth and Uncle Silas all died insane, but he is as placid and unexcitable + as a cow. + </p> + <p> + Good-by, my dear. I am sorry this is not a more cheerful letter, though at + this moment nothing unpleasant seems to be happening. It's eleven o'clock, + and I have just stuck my head into the corridor, and all is quiet except + for two banging shutters and leaking eaves. I promised Jane I would go to + bed at ten. Good night, and joy be wi' ye baith! + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. There is one thing in the midst of all my troubles that I have to be + grateful for: the Hon. Cy has been stricken with a lingering attack of + grippe. In a burst of thankfulness I sent him a bunch of violets. P.S. 2. + We are having an epidemic of pinkeye. + </p> + <p> + May 16. Good morning, my dear Judy! + </p> + <p> + Three days of sunshine, and the J. G. H. is smiling. + </p> + <p> + I am getting my immediate troubles nicely settled. Those beastly blankets + have dried at last, and our camps have been made livable again. They are + floored with wooden slats and roofed with tar paper. (Mr. Witherspoon + calls them chicken coops.) We are digging a stone-lined ditch to convey + any further cloudbursts from the plateau on which they stand to the + cornfield below. The Indians have resumed savage life, and their chief is + back at his post. + </p> + <p> + The doctor and I have been giving Loretta Higgins's nerves our most + careful consideration. We think that this barrack life, with its constant + movement and stir, is too exciting, and we have decided that the best plan + will be to board her out in a private family, where she will receive a + great deal of individual attention. + </p> + <p> + The doctor, with his usual resourcefulness, has produced the family. They + live next door to him and are very nice people; I have just returned from + calling. The husband is foreman of the casting room at the iron works, and + the wife is a comfortable soul who shakes all over when she laughs. They + live mostly in their kitchen in order to keep the parlor neat; but it is + such a cheerful kitchen that I should like to live in it myself. She has + potted begonias in the window and a nice purry tiger cat asleep on a + braided rug in front of the stove. She bakes on Saturday—cookies and + gingerbread and doughnuts. I am planning to pay my weekly call upon + Loretta every Saturday morning at eleven o'clock. Apparently I made as + favorable an impression on Mrs. Wilson as she made on me. After I had + gone, she confided to the doctor that she liked me because I was just as + common as she was. + </p> + <p> + Loretta is to learn housework and have a little garden of her own, and + particularly play out of doors in the sunshine. She is to go to bed early + and be fed up on nice nourishing food, and they are to pet her and make + her happy. All this for three dollars a week! + </p> + <p> + Why not find a hundred such families, and board out all the children? Then + this building could be turned into an idiot asylum, and I, not knowing + anything about idiots, could conscientiously resign and go back home and + live happily ever after. + </p> + <p> + Really, Judy, I am growing frightened. This asylum will get me if I stay + long enough. I am becoming so interested in it that I can't think or talk + or dream of anything else. You and Jervis have blasted all my prospects in + life. + </p> + <p> + Suppose I should retire and marry and have a family. As families go + nowadays, I couldn't hope for more than five or six children at the most, + and all with the same heredity. But, mercy! such a family appears + perfectly insignificant and monotonous. You have institutionalized me. + </p> + <p> + Reproachfully yours, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. We have a child here whose father was lynched. Isn't that a piquant + detail to have in one's history? + </p> + <p> + Tuesday. + </p> + <p> + Dearest Judy: + </p> + <p> + What shall we do? Mamie Prout does not like prunes. This antipathy to a + cheap and healthful foodstuff is nothing but imagination, and ought not to + be countenanced among the inmates of a well-managed institution. Mamie + must be made to like prunes. So says our grammar teacher, who spends the + noonday hour with us and overlooks the morals of our charges. About one + o'clock today she marched Mamie to my office charged with the offense of + refusing, ABSOLUTELY refusing, to open her mouth and put in a prune. The + child was plumped down on a stool to await punishment from me. + </p> + <p> + Now, as you know, I do not like bananas, and I should hate awfully to be + forced to swallow them; so, by the same token, why should I force Mamie + Prout to swallow prunes? + </p> + <p> + While I was pondering a course that would seem to uphold Miss Keller's + authority, but would at the same time leave a loophole for Mamie, I was + called to the telephone. + </p> + <p> + "Sit there until I come back," I said, and went out and closed the door. + </p> + <p> + The message was from a kind lady wishing to motor me to a committee + meeting. I didn't tell you that I am organizing local interest in our + behalf. The idle rich who possess estates in this neighborhood are + beginning to drift out from town, and I am laying my plans to catch them + before they are deflected by too many garden parties and tennis + tournaments. They have never been of the slightest use to this asylum, and + I think it's about time they woke up to a realization of our presence. + </p> + <p> + Returning at teatime, I was waylaid in the hall by Dr. MacRae, who + demanded some statistics from my office. I opened the door, and there sat + Mamie Prout exactly where she had been left four hours before. + </p> + <p> + "Mamie darling!" I cried in horror. "You haven't been here all this time?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, ma'am," said Mamie; "you told me to wait until you came back." + </p> + <p> + That poor patient little thing was fairly swaying with weariness, but she + never uttered a whimper. + </p> + <p> + I will say for Sandy that he was SWEET. He gathered her up in his arms and + carried her to my library, and petted her and caressed her back to smiles. + Jane brought the sewing table and spread it before the fire, and while the + doctor and I had tea, Mamie had her supper. I suppose, according to the + theory of some educators, now, when she was thoroughly worn out and + hungry, would have been the psychological moment to ply her with prunes. + But you will be pleased to hear that I did nothing of the sort, and that + the doctor for once upheld my unscientific principles. Mamie had the most + wonderful supper of her life, embellished with strawberry jam from my + private jar and peppermints from Sandy's pocket. We returned her to her + mates happy and comforted, but still possessing that regrettable distaste + for prunes. + </p> + <p> + Did you ever know anything more appalling than this soul-crushing + unreasoning obedience which Mrs. Lippett so insistently fostered? It's the + orphan asylum attitude toward life, and somehow I must crush it out. + Initiative, responsibility, curiosity, inventiveness, fight—oh dear! + I wish the doctor had a serum for injecting all these useful virtues into + an orphan's circulation. + </p> + <p> + LATER. + </p> + <p> + I wish you'd come back to New York. I've appointed you press agent for + this institution, and we need some of your floweriest writing immediately. + There are seven tots here crying to be adopted, and it's your business to + advertise them. + </p> + <p> + Little Gertrude is cross-eyed, but dear and affectionate and generous. + Can't you write her up so persuasively that some loving family will be + willing to take her even if she isn't beautiful? Her eyes can be operated + on when she's older; but if it were a cross disposition she had, no + surgeon in the world could remove that. The child knows there is something + missing, though she has never seen a live parent in her life. She holds up + her arms persuasively to every person who passes. Put in all the pathos + you are capable of, and see if you can't fetch her a mother and father. + </p> + <p> + Maybe you can get one of the New York papers to run a Sunday feature + article about a lot of different children. I'll send some photographs. You + remember what a lot of responses that "Smiling Joe" picture brought for + the Sea Breeze people? I can furnish equally taking portraits of Laughing + Lou and Gurgling Gertrude and Kicking Karl if you will just add the + literary touch. + </p> + <p> + And do find me some sports who are not afraid of heredity. This wanting + every child to come from one of the first families of Virginia is getting + tiresome. + </p> + <p> + Yours, as usual, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Friday. My dear, dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Such an upheaval! I've discharged the cook and the housekeeper, and in + delicate language conveyed the impression to our grammar teacher that she + needn't come back next year. But, oh, if I could only discharge the + Honorable Cy! + </p> + <p> + I must tell you what happened this morning. Our trustee, who has had a + dangerous illness, is now dangerously well again, and dropped in to pay a + neighborly call. Punch was occupying a rug on my library floor, virtuously + engaged with building blocks. I am separating him from the other + kindergarten children, and trying the Montessori method of a private rug + and no nervous distraction. I was flattering myself that it was working + well; his vocabulary of late has become almost prudish. + </p> + <p> + After half an hour's desultory visit, the Hon. Cy rose to go. As the door + closed behind him (I am at least thankful the child waited for that), + Punch raised his appealing brown eyes to mine and murmured, with a + confiding smile: + </p> + <p> + "Gee! ain't he got de hell of a mug?" + </p> + <p> + If you know a kind Christian family where I can place out a sweet little + five-year boy, please communicate at once with + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE, + </p> + <p> + Sup't John Grier Home. + </p> + <p> + Dear Pendletons: + </p> + <p> + I've never known anything like you two snails. You've only just reached + Washington, and I have had my suitcase packed for days, ready to spend a + rejuvenating week end CHEZ VOUS. Please hurry! I've languished in this + asylum atmosphere as long as humanely possible. I shall gasp and die if I + don't get a change. + </p> + <p> + Yours, + </p> + <p> + on the point of suffocation, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Drop a card to Gordon Hallock, telling him you are there. He will be + charmed to put himself and the Capitol at your disposal. I know that + Jervis doesn't like him, but Jervis ought to get over his baseless + prejudices against politicians. Who knows? I may be entering politics + myself some day. + </p> + <p> + My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + We do receive the most amazing presents from our friends and benefactors. + Listen to this. Last week Mr. Wilton J. Leverett (I quote from his card) + ran over a broken bottle outside our gate, and came in to visit the + institution while his chauffeur was mending the tire. Betsy showed him + about. He took an intelligent interest in everything he saw, particularly + our new camps. That is an exhibit which appeals to men. He ended by + removing his coat, and playing baseball with two tribes of Indians. After + an hour and a half he suddenly looked at his watch, begged for a glass of + water, and bowed himself off. + </p> + <p> + We had entirely forgotten the episode until this afternoon, when the + expressman drove up to the door with a present for the John Grier Home + from the chemical laboratories of Wilton J. Leverett. It was a barrel—well, + anyway, a good sized keg—full of liquid green soap! + </p> + <p> + Did I tell you that the seeds for our garden came from Washington? A + polite present from Gordon Hallock and the U. S. Government. As an example + of what the past regime did not accomplish, Martin Schladerwitz, who has + spent three years on this pseudo farm, knew no more than to dig a grave + two feet deep and bury his lettuce seeds! + </p> + <p> + Oh, you can't imagine the number of fields in which we need making over; + but of course you, of all people, can imagine. Little by little I am + getting my eyes wide open, and things that just looked funny to me at + first, now—oh dear! It's very disillusionizing. Every funny thing + that comes up seems to have a little tragedy wrapped inside it. + </p> + <p> + Just at present we are paying anxious attention to our manners—not + orphan asylum manners, but dancing school manners. There is to be nothing + Uriah Heepish about our attitude toward the world. The little girls make + curtseys when they shake hands, and the boys remove caps and rise when a + lady stands, and push in chairs at the table. (Tommy Woolsey shot Sadie + Kate into her soup yesterday, to the glee of all observers except Sadie, + who is an independent young damsel and doesn't care for these useless + masculine attentions.) At first the boys were inclined to jeer, but after + observing the politeness of their hero, Percy de Forest Witherspoon, they + have come up to the mark like little gentlemen. + </p> + <p> + Punch is paying a call this morning. For the last half-hour, while I have + been busily scratching away to you, he has been established in the window + seat, quietly and undestructively engaged with colored pencils. Betsy, EN + PASSANT, just dropped a kiss upon his nose. + </p> + <p> + "Aw, gwan!" said Punch, blushing quite pink, and wiping off the caress + with a fine show of masculine indifference. But I notice he has resumed + work upon his red-and-green landscape with heightened ardor and an attempt + at whistling. We'll succeed yet in conquering that young man's temper. + </p> + <p> + Tuesday. + </p> + <p> + The doctor is in a very grumbly mood today. He called just as the children + were marching in to dinner, whereupon he marched, too, and sampled their + food, and, oh, my dear! the potatoes were scorched! And such a + clishmaclaver as that man made! It is the first time the potatoes ever + have been scorched, and you know that scorching sometimes happens in the + best of families. But you would think from Sandy's language that the cook + had scorched them on purpose, in accordance with my orders. + </p> + <p> + As I have told you before, I could do very nicely without Sandy. + </p> + <p> + Wednesday. + </p> + <p> + Yesterday being a wonderful sunny day, Betsy and I turned our backs upon + duty and motored to the very fancy home of some friends of hers, where we + had tea in an Italian garden. Punch and Sadie Kate had been SUCH good + children all day that at the last moment we telephoned for permission to + include them, too. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, indeed, do bring the little dears," was the enthusiastic response. + </p> + <p> + But the choice of Punch and Sadie Kate was a mistake. We ought to have + taken Mamie Prout, who has demonstrated her ability to sit. I shall spare + you the details of our visit; the climax was reached when Punch went + goldfishing in the bottom of the swimming pool. Our host pulled him out by + an agitated leg, and the child returned to the asylum swathed in that + gentleman's rose-colored bathrobe. + </p> + <p> + What do you think? Dr. Robin MacRae, in a contrite mood for having been so + intensely disagreeable yesterday, has just invited Betsy and me to take + supper in his olive-green house next Sunday evening at seven o'clock in + order to look at some microscopic slides. The entertainment, I believe, is + to consist of a scarlet-fever culture, some alcoholic tissue, and a + tubercular gland. These social attentions bore him excessively; but he + realizes that if he is to have free scope in applying his theories to the + institution he must be a little polite to its superintendent. + </p> + <p> + I have just read this letter over, and I must admit that it skips lightly + from topic to topic. But though it may not contain news of any great + moment, I trust you will realize that its writing has consumed every + vacant minute during the last three days. I am, + </p> + <p> + Most fully occupied, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. A blessed woman came this morning and said she would take a child for + the summer—one of the sickest, weakest, neediest babies I could give + her. She had just lost her husband, and wanted something HARD to do. Isn't + that really very touching? + </p> + <p> + Saturday afternoon. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy and Jervis: + </p> + <p> + Brother Jimmie (we are very alliterative!), spurred on by sundry begging + letters from me, has at last sent us a present; but he picked it out + himself. + </p> + <p> + WE HAVE A MONKEY! His name is Java. The children no longer hear the school + bell ring. On the day the creature came, this entire institution formed in + line and filed past and shook his paw. Poor Sing's nose is out of joint. I + have to PAY to have him washed. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate is developing into my private secretary. I have her answer the + thank-you letters for the institution, and her literary style is making a + hit among our benefactors. She invariably calls out a second gift. I had + hitherto believed that the Kilcoyne family sprang from the wild west of + Ireland, but I begin to suspect that their source was nearer Blarney + Castle. You can see from the inclosed copy of the letter she sent to + Jimmie what a persuasive pen the young person has. I trust that in this + case at least, it will not bear the fruit that she suggests. + </p> + <p> + Dear Mr. Jimie + </p> + <p> + We thank you very much for the lovly monkey you give. We name him java + because that's a warm iland across the ocian where he was born up in a + nest like a bird only big the doctor told us. + </p> + <p> + The first day he come every boy and girl shook his hand and said good + morning java his hand feels funny he holds so tite. I was afraid to touch + him but now I let him sit on my shoulder and put his arms around my kneck + if he wants to. He makes a funny noise that sounds like swering and gets + mad when his tale is puled. + </p> + <p> + We love him dearly and we love you two. + </p> + <p> + The next time you have to give a present, please send an elifant. Well I + guess Ill stop. + </p> + <p> + Yours truly, + </p> + <p> + SADIE KATE KILCOYNE. + </p> + <p> + Percy de Forest Witherspoon is still faithful to his little followers, + though I am so afraid he will get tired that I urge him to take frequent + vacations. He has not only been faithful himself, but has brought in + recruits. He has large social connections in the neighborhood, and last + Saturday evening he introduced two friends, nice men who sat around the + campfire and swapped hunting stories. + </p> + <p> + One of them was just back from around the world, and told hair-raising + anecdotes of the head hunters of Sarawak, a narrow pink country on the top + of Borneo. My little braves pant to grow up and get to Sarawak, and go out + on the war-path after head hunters. Every encyclopedia in this institution + has been consulted, and there isn't a boy here who cannot tell you the + history, manners, climate, flora, and fungi of Borneo. I only wish Mr. + Witherspoon would introduce friends who had been head hunting in England, + France, and Germany, countries not quite so CHIC as Sarawak, but more + useful for general culture. + </p> + <p> + We have a new cook, the fourth since my reign began. I haven't bothered + you with my cooking troubles, but institutions don't escape any more than + families. The last is a negro woman, a big, fat, smiling, + chocolate-colored creature from Souf Ca'lina. And ever since she came on + honey dew we've fed! Her name is—what do you guess? SALLIE, if you + please. I suggested that she change it. + </p> + <p> + "Sho, Miss, I's had dat name Sallie longer'n you, an' I couldn't get used + nohow to answerin' up pert-like when you sings out `Mollie!' Seems like + Sallie jest b'longs to me." + </p> + <p> + So "Sallie" she remains; but at least there is no danger of our getting + our letters mixed, for her last name is nothing so plebeian as McBride. + It's Johnston-Washington, with a hyphen. + </p> + <p> + Sunday. + </p> + <p> + Our favorite game of late is finding pet names for Sandy. His austere + presence lends itself to caricature. We have just originated a new batch. + The "Laird o' Cockpen" is Percy's choice. + </p> + <p> + The Laird o' Cockpen he's proud and he's great; His mind is ta'en up wi' + the things of the state. + </p> + <p> + Miss Snaith disgustedly calls him "that man," and Betsy refers to him (in + his absence) as "Dr. Cod-Liver." My present favorite is "Macphairson Clon + Glocketty Angus McClan." But for real poetic feeling, Sadie Kate beats us + all. She calls him "Mister Someday Soon." I don't believe that the doctor + ever dropped into verse but once in his life, but every child in this + institution knows that one poem by heart. + </p> + <p> + Someday soon something nice is going to happen; + </p> + <p> + Be a good little girl and take this hint: Swallow with a smile your + cod-liver ile, + </p> + <p> + And the first thing you know you will have a peppermint. + </p> + <p> + It's this evening that Betsy and I attend his supper party, and I confess + that we are looking forward to seeing the interior of his gloomy mansion + with gleeful eagerness. He never talks about himself or his past or + anybody connected with himself. He appears to be an isolated figure + standing on a pedestal labeled S C I E N C E, without a glimmer of any + ordinary affections or emotions or human frailties except temper. Betsy + and I are simply eaten up with curiosity to know what sort of past he came + out of; but just let us get inside his house, and to our detective senses + it will tell its own story. So long as the portal was guarded by a fierce + McGurk, we had despaired of ever effecting an entrance; but now, behold! + The door has opened of its own accord. + </p> + <p> + To be continued. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + Monday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + We attended the doctor's supper party last night, Betsy and Mr. + Witherspoon and I. It turned out a passably cheerful occasion, though I + will say that it began under heavy auspices. + </p> + <p> + His house on the inside is all that the outside promises. Never in my life + have I seen such an interior as that man's dining room. The walls and + carpets and lambrequins are a heavy dark green. A black marble mantelpiece + shelters a few smoking black coals. The furniture is as nearly black as + furniture comes. The decorations are two steel engravings in shiny black + frames—the "Monarch of the Glen," and the "Stag at Bay." + </p> + <p> + We tried hard to be light and sparkling, but it was like eating supper in + the family vault. Mrs. McGurk, in black alpaca with a black silk apron, + clumped around the table, passing cold, heavy things to eat, with a step + so firm that she rattled the silver in the sideboard drawers. Her nose was + up, and her mouth was down. She clearly does not approve of the master's + entertaining, and she wishes to discourage all guests from ever accepting + again. + </p> + <p> + Sandy sort of dimly knows that there is something the matter with his + house, and in order to brighten it up a bit in honor of his guests, he had + purchased flowers,—dozens of them,—the most exquisite pink + Killarney roses and red and yellow tulips. The McGurk had wedged them all + together as tight as they would fit into a peacock-blue jardiniere, and + plumped it down in the center of the table. The thing was as big as a + bushel-basket. Betsy and I nearly forgot our manners when we saw that + centerpiece; but the doctor seemed so innocently pleased at having + obtained a bright note in his dining room that we suppressed our amusement + and complimented him warmly upon his happy color scheme. + </p> + <p> + The moment supper was over, we hastened with relief to his own part of the + house, where the McGurk's influence does not penetrate. No one in a + cleaning capacity ever enters either his library or office or laboratory + except Llewelyn, a short, wiry, bow-legged Welshman, who combines to a + unique degree the qualities of chambermaid and chauffeur. + </p> + <p> + The library, though not the most cheerful room I have ever seen, still, + for a man's house, is not so bad—books all around from floor to + ceiling, with the overflow in piles on floor and table and mantelpiece; + half a dozen abysmal leather chairs and a rug or so, with another black + marble mantelpiece, but this time containing a crackling wood fire. By way + of bric-a-brac, he has a stuffed pelican and a crane with a frog in its + mouth, also a raccoon sitting on a log, and a varnished tarpon. A faint + suggestion of iodoform floats in the air. + </p> + <p> + The doctor made the coffee himself in a French machine, and we dismissed + his housekeeper from our spirits. He really did do his best to be a + thoughtful host and I have to report that the word "insanity" was not once + mentioned. It seems that Sandy, in his moments of relaxation, is a + fisherman. He and Percy began swapping stories of salmon and trout, and he + finally got out his case of fishing flies, and gallantly presented Betsy + and me with a "silver doctor" and a "Jack Scott" out of which to make + hatpins. Then the conversation wandered to sport on the Scotch moors, and + he told about one time when he was lost, and spent the night out in the + heather. There is no doubt about it, Sandy's heart is in the highlands. + </p> + <p> + I am afraid that Betsy and I have wronged him. Though it is hard to + relinquish the interesting idea, he may not, after all, have committed a + crime. We are now leaning to the belief that he was crossed in love. + </p> + <p> + It's really horrid of me to make fun of poor Sandy, for, despite his stern + bleakness of disposition, he's a pathetic figure of a man. Think of coming + home after an anxious day's round to eat a solitary dinner in that grim + dining room! + </p> + <p> + Do you suppose it would cheer him up a little if I should send my company + of artists to paint a frieze of rabbits around the wall? + </p> + <p> + With love, as usual, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Aren't you ever coming back to New York? Please hurry! I need a new hat, + and am desirous of shopping for it on Fifth Avenue, not on Water Street. + Mrs. Gruby, our best milliner, does not believe in slavishly following + Paris Fashions; she originates her own styles. But three years ago, as a + great concession to convention, she did make a tour of the New York shops, + and is still creating models on the uplift of that visit. + </p> + <p> + Also, besides my own hat, I must buy 113 hats for my children, to say + nothing of shoes and knickerbockers and shirts and hair-ribbons and + stockings and garters. It's quite a task to keep a little family like mine + decently clothed. + </p> + <p> + Did you get that big letter I wrote you last week? You never had the grace + to mention it in yours of Thursday, and it was seventeen pages long, and + took me DAYS to write. + </p> + <p> + Yours truly, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Why don't you tell me some news about Gordon? Have you seen him, and + did he mention me? Is he running after any of those pretty Southern girls + that Washington is so full of? You know that I want to hear. Why must you + be so beastly uncommunicative? + </p> + <p> + Tuesday, 4:27 P.M. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Your telegram came two minutes ago by telephone. + </p> + <p> + Yes, thank you, I shall be delighted to arrive at 5:49 on Thursday + afternoon. And don't make any engagements for that evening, please, as I + intend to sit up until midnight talking John Grier gossip with you and the + president. + </p> + <p> + Friday and Saturday and Monday I shall have to devote to shopping. Oh, + yes, you're right; I already possess more clothes than any jailbird needs, + but when spring comes, I must have new plumage. As it is, I wear an + evening gown every night just to wear them out—no, not entirely + that; to make myself believe that I'm still an ordinary girl despite this + extraordinary life that you have pushed me into. + </p> + <p> + The Hon. Cy found me yesterday arrayed in a Nile-green crepe (Jane's + creation, though it looked Parisian). He was quite puzzled when he found I + wasn't going to a ball. I invited him to stay and dine with me, and he + accepted! We got on very affably. He expands over his dinner. Food appears + to agree with him. If there's any Bernard Shaw in New York just now, I + believe that I might spare a couple of hours Saturday afternoon for a + matinee. G. B. S.'s dialogue would afford such a life-giving contrast to + the Hon. Cy's. + </p> + <p> + There's no use writing any more; I'll wait and talk. + </p> + <p> + ADDIO. SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Oh dear! just as I had begun to catch glimmerings of niceness in + Sandy, he broke out again and was ABOMINABLE. We unfortunately have five + cases of measles in this institution, and the man's manner suggests that + Miss Snaith and I gave the measles to the children on purpose to make him + trouble. There are many days when I should be willing to accept our + doctor's resignation. + </p> + <p> + Wednesday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + Your brief and dignified note of yesterday is at hand. I have never known + anybody whose literary style resembled so exactly his spoken word. + </p> + <p> + And you will be greatly obliged if I will drop my absurd fashion of + calling you "Enemy"? I will drop my absurd fashion of calling you Enemy + just as soon as you drop your absurd fashion of getting angry and abusive + and insulting the moment any little thing goes wrong. + </p> + <p> + I am leaving tomorrow afternoon to spend four days in New York. + </p> + <p> + Yours truly, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + CHEZ THE PENDLETONS, New York. My dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + I trust that this note will find you in a more affable frame of mind than + when I saw you last. I emphatically repeat that it was not due to the + carelessness of the superintendent of our institution that those two new + cases of measles crept in, but rather to the unfortunate anatomy of our + old-fashioned building, which does not permit of the proper isolation of + contagious cases. + </p> + <p> + As you did not deign to visit us yesterday morning before I left, I could + not offer any parting suggestions. I therefore write to ask that you cast + your critical eye upon Mamie Prout. She is covered all over with little + red spots which may be measles, though I am hoping not. Mamie spots very + easily. + </p> + <p> + I return to prison life next Monday at six o'clock. + </p> + <p> + Yours truly, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. I trust you will pardon my mentioning it, but you are not the kind of + doctor that I admire. I like them chubby and round and smiling. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + June 9. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + You are an awful family for an impressionable young girl to visit. How can + you expect me to come back and settle down contentedly to institution life + after witnessing such a happy picture of domestic concord as the Pendleton + household presents? + </p> + <p> + All the way back in the train, instead of occupying myself with two + novels, four magazines, and one box of chocolates that your husband + thoughtfully provided, I spent the time in a mental review of the young + men of my acquaintance to see if I couldn't discover one as nice as + Jervis. I did! (A little nicer, I think.) From this day on he is the + marked-down victim, the destined prey. + </p> + <p> + I shall hate to give up the asylum after getting so excited over it, but + unless you are willing to move it to the capital, I don't see any + alternative. + </p> + <p> + The train was awfully late. We sat and smoked on a siding while two + accommodations and a freight dashed past. I think we must have broken + something, and had to tinker up our engine. The conductor was soothing, + but uncommunicative. + </p> + <p> + It was 7:30 when I descended, the only passenger, at our insignificant + station in the pitch darkness and RAIN, without an umbrella, and wearing + that precious new hat. No Turnfelt to meet me; not even a station hack. To + be sure, I hadn't telegraphed the exact time of my arrival, but, still, I + did feel rather neglected. I had sort of vaguely expected all ONE HUNDRED + AND THIRTEEN to be drawn up by the platform, scattering flowers and + singing songs of welcome. Just as I was telling the station man that I + would watch his telegraph instrument while he ran across to the corner + saloon and telephoned for a vehicle, there came whirling around the corner + two big searchlights aimed straight at me. They stopped nine inches before + running me down, and I heard Sandy's voice saying: + </p> + <p> + "Weel, weel, Miss Sallie McBride! I'm thinking it's ower time you came + back to tak' the bit bairns off my hands." + </p> + <p> + That man had come three times to meet me on the off chance of the train's + getting in some time. He tucked me and my new hat and bags and books and + chocolates all in under his waterproof flap, and we splashed off. Really, + I felt as if I was getting back home again, and quite sad at the thought + of ever having to leave. Mentally, you see, I had already resigned and + packed and gone. The mere idea that you are not in a place for the rest of + your life gives you an awfully unstable feeling. That's why trial + marriages would never work. You've got to feel you're in a thing + irrevocably and forever in order to buckle down and really put your whole + mind into making it a success. + </p> + <p> + It's astounding how much news can accrue in four days. Sandy just couldn't + talk fast enough to tell me everything I wanted to hear. Among other + items, I learned that Sadie Kate had spent two days in the infirmary, her + malady being, according to the doctor's diagnosis, half a jar of + gooseberry jam and Heaven knows how many doughnuts. Her work had been + changed during my absence to dishwashing in the officers' pantry, and the + juxtaposition of so many exotic luxuries was too much for her fragile + virtue. + </p> + <p> + Also, our colored cook Sallie and our colored useful man Noah have entered + upon a war of extermination. The original trouble was over a little matter + of kindling, augmented by a pail of hot water that Sallie threw out of the + window with, for a woman, unusual accuracy of aim. You can see what a rare + character the head of an orphan asylum must have. She has to combine the + qualities of a baby nurse and a police magistrate. + </p> + <p> + The doctor had told only the half when we reached the house, and as he had + not yet dined, owing to meeting me three times, I begged him to accept the + hospitality of the John Grier. I would get Betsy and Mr. Witherspoon, and + we would hold an executive meeting, and settle all our neglected + businesses. + </p> + <p> + Sandy accepted with flattering promptness. He likes to dine outside of the + family vault. + </p> + <p> + But Betsy, I found, had dashed home to greet a visiting grandparent, and + Percy was playing bridge in the village. It's seldom the young thing gets + out of an evening, and I'm glad for him to have a little cheerful + diversion. + </p> + <p> + So it ended in the doctor's and my dining tete-a-tete on a hastily + improvised dinner,—it was then close upon eight, and our normal + dinner hour is 6:30,—but it was such an improvised dinner as I am + sure Mrs. McGurk never served him. Sallie, wishing to impress me with her + invaluableness, did her absolutely Southern best. And after dinner we had + coffee before the fire in my comfortable blue library, while the wind + howled outside and the shutters banged. + </p> + <p> + We passed a most cordial and intimate evening. For the first time since + our acquaintance I struck a new note in the man. There really is something + attractive about him when you once come to know him. But the process of + knowing him requires time and tact. He's no' very gleg at the uptak. I've + never seen such a tantalizing inexplicable person. All the time I'm + talking to him I feel as though behind his straight line of a mouth and + his half-shut eyes there were banked fires smoldering inside. Are you sure + he hasn't committed a crime? He does manage to convey the delicious + feeling that he has. + </p> + <p> + And I must add that Sandy's not so bad a talker when he lets himself go. + He has the entire volume of Scotch literature at his tongue's end. + </p> + <p> + "Little kens the auld wife as she sits by the fire what the wind is doing + on Hurly-Burly-Swire," he observed as a specially fierce blast drove the + rain against the window. That sounds pat, doesn't it? I haven't, though, + the remotest idea what it means. And listen to this: between cups of + coffee (he drinks far too much coffee for a sensible medical man) he + casually let fall the news that his family knew the R. L. S. family + personally, and used to take supper at 17 Heriot Row! I tended him + assiduously for the rest of the evening in a Did you once see Shelley + plain, And did he stop and speak to you? frame of mind. + </p> + <p> + When I started this letter, I had no intention of filling it with a + description of the recently excavated charms of Robin MacRae; it's just by + way of remorseful apology. He was so nice and companionable last night + that I have been going about today feeling conscience-smitten at the + thought of how mercilessly I made fun of him to you and Jervis. I really + didn't mean quite all of the impolite things that I said. About once a + month the man is sweet and tractable and engaging. + </p> + <p> + Punch has just been paying a social call, and during the course of it he + lost three little toadlings an inch long. Sadie Kate recovered one of them + from under the bookcase, but the other two hopped away; and I'm so afraid + they've taken sanctuary in my bed! I do wish that mice and snakes and + toads and angleworms were not so portable. You never know what is going on + in a perfectly respectable-looking child's pocket. + </p> + <p> + I had a beautiful visit in Casa Pendleton. Don't forget your promise to + return it soon. + </p> + <p> + Yours as ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. I left a pair of pale-blue bedroom slippers under the bed. Will you + please have Mary wrap them up and mail them to me? And hold her hand while + she writes the address. She spelt my name on the place cards "Mackbird." + </p> + <p> + Tuesday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + As I told you, I left an application for an accomplished nurse with the + employment bureau of New York. + </p> + <p> + Wanted! A nurse maid with an ample lap suitable for the accommodation of + seventeen babies at once. + </p> + <p> + She came this afternoon, and this is the fine figure of a woman that I + drew! + </p> + <p> + We couldn't keep a baby from sliding off her lap unless we fastened him + firmly with safety pins. + </p> + <p> + Please give Sadie Kate the magazine. I'll read it tonight and return it + tomorrow. + </p> + <p> + Was there ever a more docile and obedient pupil than + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE? + </p> + <p> + Thursday. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I've been spending the last three days busily getting under way all those + latest innovations that we planned in New York. Your word is law. A public + cooky jar has been established. + </p> + <p> + Also, the eighty play boxes have been ordered. It is a wonderful idea, + having a private box for each child, where he can store up his treasures. + The ownership of a little personal property will help develop them into + responsible citizens. I ought to have thought of it myself, but for some + reason the idea didn't come. Poor Judy! You have inside knowledge of the + longings of their little hearts that I shall never be able to achieve, not + with all the sympathy I can muster. + </p> + <p> + We are doing our best to run this institution with as few discommoding + rules as possible, but in regard to those play boxes there is one point on + which I shall have to be firm. The children may not keep in them mice or + toads or angleworms. + </p> + <p> + I can't tell you how pleased I am that Betsy's salary is to be raised, and + that we are to keep her permanently. But the Hon. Cy Wykoff deprecates the + step. He has been making inquiries, and he finds that her people are + perfectly able to take care of her without any salary. + </p> + <p> + "You don't furnish legal advice for nothing," say I to him. "Why should + she furnish her trained services for nothing?" + </p> + <p> + "This is charitable work." + </p> + <p> + "Then work which is undertaken for your own good should be paid, but work + which is undertaken for the public good should not be paid?" + </p> + <p> + "Fiddlesticks!" says he. "She's a woman, and her family ought to support + her." + </p> + <p> + This opened up vistas of argument which I did not care to enter with the + Hon. Cy, so I asked him whether he thought it would be nicer to have a + real lawn or hay on the slope that leads to the gate. He likes to be + consulted, and I pamper him as much as possible in all unessential + details. You see, I am following Sandy's canny advice: "Trustees are like + fiddle-strings; they maunna be screwed ower tight. Humor the mon, but gang + your ain gait." Oh, the tact that this asylum is teaching me! I should + make a wonderful politician's wife. + </p> + <p> + Thursday night. + </p> + <p> + You will be interested to hear that I have temporarily placed out Punch + with two charming spinsters who have long been tottering on the brink of a + child. They finally came last week, and said they would like to try one + for a month to see what the sensation felt like. + </p> + <p> + They wanted, of course, a pretty ornament, dressed in pink and white and + descended from the Mayflower. I told them that any one could bring up a + daughter of the Mayflower to be an ornament to society, but the real feat + was to bring up a son of an Italian organ-grinder and an Irish + washerwoman. And I offered Punch. That Neapolitan heredity of his, + artistically speaking, may turn out a glorious mixture, if the right + environment comes along to choke out all the weeds. + </p> + <p> + I put it up to them as a sporting proposition, and they were game. They + have agreed to take him for one month and concentrate upon his remaking + all their years of conserved force, to the end that he may be fit for + adoption in some moral family. They both have a sense of humor and + ACCOMPLISHING characters, or I should never have dared to propose it. And + really I believe it's going to be the one way of taming our young + fire-eater. They will furnish the affection and caresses and attention + that in his whole abused little life he has never had. + </p> + <p> + They live in a fascinating old house with an Italian garden, and + furnishings selected from the whole round world. It does seem like + sacrilege to turn that destructive child loose in such a collection of + treasures. But he hasn't broken anything here for more than a month, and I + believe that the Italian in him will respond to all that beauty. + </p> + <p> + I warned them that they must not shrink from any profanity that might + issue from his pretty baby lips. + </p> + <p> + He departed last night in a very fancy automobile, and maybe I wasn't glad + to say good-by to our disreputable young man! He has absorbed just about + half of my energy. + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + The pendant arrived this morning. Many thanks! But you really ought not to + have given me another; a hostess cannot be held accountable for all the + things that careless guests lose in her house. It is far too pretty for my + chain. I am thinking of having my nose pierced, Cingalese fashion, and + wearing my new jewel where it will really show. + </p> + <p> + I must tell you that our Percy is putting some good constructive work into + this asylum. He has founded the John Grier Bank, and has worked out all + the details in a very professional and businesslike fashion, entirely + incomprehensible to my non-mathematical mind. All of the older children + possess properly printed checkbooks, and they are each to be paid five + dollars a week for their services, such as going to school and + accomplishing housework. They are then to pay the institution (by check) + for their board and clothes, which will consume their five dollars. It + looks like a vicious circle, but it's really very educative; they will + comprehend the value of money before we dump them into a mercenary world. + Those who are particularly good in lessons or work will receive an extra + recompense. My head aches at the thought of the bookkeeping, but Percy + waves that aside as a mere bagatelle. It is to be accomplished by our + prize arithmeticians, and will train them for positions of trust. If + Jervis hears of any opening for bank officials, let me know; I shall have + a well-trained president, cashier, and paying teller ready to be placed by + this time next year. + </p> + <p> + Saturday. + </p> + <p> + Our doctor doesn't like to be called "Enemy." It hurts his feelings or his + dignity or something of the sort. But since I will persist, despite his + expostulations, he has finally retaliated with a nickname for me. He calls + me "Miss Sally Lunn," and is in a glow of pride at having achieved such an + imaginative flight. + </p> + <p> + He and I have invented a new pastime: he talks Scotch, and I answer in + Irish. Our conversations run like this: + </p> + <p> + "Good afthernoon to ye, docther. An' how's yer health the day?" + </p> + <p> + "Verra weel, verra weel. And how gas it wi' a' the bairns?" + </p> + <p> + "Shure, they're all av thim doin' foin." + </p> + <p> + "I'm gey glad to hear it. This saft weather is hard on folk. There's + muckle sickness aboot the kintra." + </p> + <p> + "Hiven be praised it has not lighted here! But sit down, docther, an' make + yersilf at home. Will ye be afther havin' a cup o' tay?" + </p> + <p> + "Hoot, woman! I would na hae you fash yoursel', but a wee drap tea winna + coom amiss." + </p> + <p> + "Whist! It's no thruble at all." + </p> + <p> + You may not think this a very dizzying excursion into frivolity; but I + assure you, for one of Sandy's dignity, it's positively riotous. The man + has been in a heavenly temper ever since I came back; not a single cross + word. I am beginning to think I may reform him as well as Punch. + </p> + <p> + This letter must be about long enough even for you. I've been writing it + bit by bit for three days, whenever I happened to pass my desk. + </p> + <p> + Yours as ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. I don't think much of your vaunted prescription for hair tonic. + Either the druggist didn't mix it right, or Jane didn't apply it with + discretion. I stuck to the pillow this morning. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Saturday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + Your letter of Thursday is at hand, and extremely silly I consider it. Of + course I am not trying to let you down easy; that isn't my way. If I let + you down at all, it will be suddenly and with an awful bump. But I + honestly didn't realize that it had been three weeks since I wrote. Please + excuse! + </p> + <p> + Also, my dear sir, I have to bring you to account. You were in New York + last week, and you never ran up to see us. You thought we wouldn't find it + out, but we heard—and are insulted. + </p> + <p> + Would you like an outline of my day's activities? Wrote monthly report for + trustees' meeting. Audited accounts. Entertained agent of State Charities + Aid Association for luncheon. Supervised children's menus for next ten + days. Dictated five letters to families who have our children. Visited our + little feeble-minded Loretta Higgins (pardon the reference; I know you + don't like me to mention the feeble-minded), who is being boarded out in a + nice comfortable family, where she is learning to work. Came back to tea + and a conference with the doctor about sending a child with tubercular + glands to a sanatorium. Read an article on cottage VERSUS congregate + system for housing dependent children. (We do need cottages! I wish you'd + send us a few for a Christmas present.) And now at nine o'clock I'm + sleepily beginning a letter to you. Do you know many young society girls + who can point to such a useful day as that? + </p> + <p> + Oh, I forgot to say that I stole ten minutes from my accounts this morning + to install a new cook. Our Sallie Washington-Johnston, who cooked fit for + the angels had a dreadful, dreadful temper and terrorized poor Noah, our + super-excellent furnace man, to the point of giving notice. We couldn't + spare Noah. He's more useful to the institution than its superintendent, + and so Sallie Washington-Johnston is no more. + </p> + <p> + When I asked the new cook her name, she replied, "Ma name is Suzanne + Estelle, but ma friends call me Pet." Pet cooked the dinner tonight, but I + must say that she lacks Sallie's delicate touch. I am awfully disappointed + that you didn't visit us while Sallie was still here. You would have taken + away an exalted opinion of my housekeeping. + </p> + <p> + Drowsiness overcame me at that point, and it's now two days later. + </p> + <p> + Poor neglected Gordon! It has just occurred to me that you never got + thanked for the modeling clay which came two weeks ago, and it was such an + unusually intelligent present that I should have telegraphed my + appreciation. When I opened the box and saw all that nice messy putty + stuff, I sat down on the spot and created a statue of Singapore. The + children love it; and it is very good to have the handicraft side of their + training encouraged. + </p> + <p> + After a careful study of American history, I have determined that nothing + is so valuable to a future president as an early obligatory unescapable + performance of CHORES. + </p> + <p> + Therefore I have divided the daily work of this institution into a hundred + parcels, and the children rotate weekly through a succession of + unaccustomed tasks. Of course they do everything badly, for just as they + learn how, they progress to something new. It would be infinitely easier + for us to follow Mrs. Lippett's immoral custom of keeping each child + sentenced for life to a well-learned routine; but when the temptation + assails me, I recall the dreary picture of Florence Henty, who polished + the brass doorknobs of this institution for seven years—and I + sternly shove the children on. + </p> + <p> + I get angry every time I think of Mrs Lippett. She had exactly the point + of view of a Tammany politician—no slightest sense of service to + society. Her only interest in the John Grier Home was to get a living out + of it. + </p> + <p> + Wednesday. + </p> + <p> + What new branch of learning do you think I have introduced into my asylum? + Table manners! + </p> + <p> + I never had any idea that it was such a lot of trouble to teach children + how to eat and drink. Their favorite method is to put their mouths down to + their mugs and lap their milk like kittens. Good manners are not merely + snobbish ornaments, as Mrs. Lippett's regime appeared to believe. They + mean self-discipline and thought for others, and my children have got to + learn them. + </p> + <p> + That woman never allowed them to talk at their meals, and I am having the + most dreadful time getting any conversation out of them above a frightened + whisper. So I have instituted the custom of the entire staff, myself + included, sitting with them at the table, and directing the talk along + cheerful and improving lines. + </p> + <p> + Also I have established a small, very strict training table, where the + little dears, in relays, undergo a week of steady badgering. Our uplifting + table conversations run like this: + </p> + <p> + "Yes, Tom, Napoleon Bonaparte was a very great man—elbows off the + table. He possessed a tremendous power of concentrating his mind on + whatever he wanted to have; and that is the way to accomplish—don't + snatch, Susan; ask politely for the bread, and Carrie will pass it to you.—But + he was an example of the fact that selfish thought just for oneself, + without considering the lives of others, will come to disaster in the—Tom! + Keep your mouth shut when you chew—and after the battle of Waterloo—let + Sadie's cooky alone—his fall was all the greater because—Sadie + Kate, you may leave the table. It makes no difference what he did. Under + no provocation does a lady slap a gentleman." + </p> + <p> + Two more days have passed; this is the same kind of meandering letter I + write to Judy. At least, my dear man, you can't complain that I haven't + been thinking about you this week! I know you hate to be told all about + the asylum, but I can't help it, for it's all I know. I don't have five + minutes a day to read the papers. The big outside world has dropped away. + My interests all lie on the inside of this little iron inclosure. + </p> + <p> + I am at present, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE, + </p> + <p> + Superintendent of the + </p> + <p> + John Grier Home. + </p> + <p> + Thursday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + "Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in." Hasn't that a very + philosophical, detached, Lord of the Universe sound? It comes from + Thoreau, whom I am assiduously reading at present. As you see, I have + revolted against your literature and taken to my own again. The last two + evenings have been devoted to "Walden," a book as far removed as possible + from the problems of the dependent child. + </p> + <p> + Did you ever read old Henry David Thoreau? You really ought. I think you'd + find him a congenial soul. Listen to this: "Society is commonly too cheap. + We meet at very short intervals, not having had time to acquire any new + value for each other. It would be better if there were but one habitation + to a square mile, as where I live." A pleasant, expansive, neebor-like man + he must have been! He minds me in some ways o' Sandy. + </p> + <p> + This is to tell you that we have a placing-out agent visiting us. She is + about to dispose of four chicks, one of them Thomas Kehoe. What do you + think? Ought we to risk it? The place she has in mind for him is a farm in + a no-license portion of Connecticut, where he will work hard for his + board, and live in the farmer's family. It sounds exactly the right thing, + and we can't keep him here forever; he'll have to be turned out some day + into a world full of whisky. + </p> + <p> + I'm sorry to tear you away from that cheerful work on "Dementia Precox," + but I'd be most obliged if you'd drop in here toward eight o'clock for a + conference with the agent. + </p> + <p> + I am, as usual, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + June 17. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Betsy has perpetrated a most unconscionable trick upon a pair of adopting + parents. They have traveled East from Ohio in their touring car for the + dual purpose of seeing the country and picking up a daughter. They appear + to be the leading citizens of their town, whose name at the moment escapes + me; but it's a very important town. It has electric lights and gas, and + Mr. Leading Citizen owns the controlling interest in both plants. With a + wave of his hand he could plunge that entire town into darkness; but + fortunately he's a kind man, and won't do anything so harsh, not even if + they fail to reelect him mayor. He lives in a brick house with a slate + roof and two towers, and has a deer and fountain and lots of nice shade + trees in the yard. (He carries its photograph in his pocket.) They are + good-natured, generous, kind-hearted, smiling people, and a little fat; + you can see what desirable parents they would make. + </p> + <p> + Well, we had exactly the daughter of their dreams, only, as they came + without giving us notice, she was dressed in a flannellet nightgown, and + her face was dirty. They looked Caroline over, and were not impressed; but + they thanked us politely, and said they would bear her in mind. They + wanted to visit the New York Orphanage before deciding. We knew well that, + if they saw that superior assemblage of children, our poor little Caroline + would never have a chance. + </p> + <p> + Then Betsy rose to the emergency. She graciously invited them to motor + over to her house for tea that afternoon and inspect one of our little + wards who would be visiting her baby niece. Mr. and Mrs. Leading Citizen + do not know many people in the East, and they haven't been receiving the + invitations that they feel are their due; so they were quite innocently + pleased at the prospect of a little social diversion. The moment they had + retired to the hotel for luncheon, Betsy called up her car, and rushed + baby Caroline over to her house. She stuffed her into baby niece's best + pink-and-white embroidered frock, borrowed a hat of Irish lace, some pink + socks and white slippers, and set her picturesquely upon the green lawn + under a spreading beech tree. A white-aproned nurse (borrowed also from + baby niece) plied her with bread and milk and gaily colored toys. By the + time prospective parents arrived, our Caroline, full of food and + contentment, greeted them with cooes of delight. From the moment their + eyes fell upon her they were ravished with desire. Not a suspicion crossed + their unobservant minds that this sweet little rosebud was the child of + the morning. And so, a few formalities having been complied with, it + really looks as though baby Caroline would live in the Towers and grow + into a leading citizen. + </p> + <p> + I must really get to work, without any further delay, upon the burning + question of new clothes for our girls. + </p> + <p> + With the highest esteem, I am, D'r Ma'am, Y'r most ob'd't and h'mble + serv't, + </p> + <p> + SAL. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + June 19th. My dearest Judy: + </p> + <p> + Listen to the grandest innovation of all, and one that will delight your + heart. + </p> + <p> + NO MORE BLUE GINGHAM! + </p> + <p> + Feeling that this aristocratic neighborhood of country estates might + contain valuable food for our asylum, I have of late been moving in the + village social circles, and at a luncheon yesterday I dug out a beautiful + and charming widow who wears delectable, flowing gowns that she designs + herself. She confided to me that she would have loved to have been a + dressmaker, if she had only been born with a needle in her mouth instead + of a golden spoon. She says she never sees a pretty girl badly dressed but + she longs to take her in hand and make her over. Did you ever hear + anything so apropos? From the moment she opened her lips she was a marked + man. + </p> + <p> + "I can show you fifty-nine badly dressed girls," said I to her, "and you + have got to come back with me and plan their new clothes and make them + beautiful." + </p> + <p> + She expostulated; but in vain. I led her out to her automobile, shoved her + in, and murmured, "John Grier Home" to the chauffeur. The first inmate our + eyes fell upon was Sadie Kate, just fresh, I judge, from hugging the + molasses barrel; and a shocking spectacle she was for any esthetically + minded person. In addition to the stickiness, one stocking was coming + down, her pinafore was buttoned crookedly, and she had lost a hair-ribbon. + But—as always—completely at ease, she welcomed us with a + cheery grin, and offered the lady a sticky paw. + </p> + <p> + "Now," said I, in triumph, "you see how much we need you. What can you do + to make Sadie Kate beautiful?" + </p> + <p> + "Wash her," said Mrs. Livermore. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate was marched to my bathroom. When the scrubbing was finished and + the hair strained back and the stocking restored to seemly heights, I + returned her for a second inspection—a perfectly normal little + orphan. Mrs. Livermore turned her from side to side, and studied her long + and earnestly. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate by nature is a beauty, a wild, dark, Gypsyish little colleen. + She looks fresh from the wind-swept moors of Connemara. But, oh, we have + managed to rob her of her birthright with this awful institution uniform! + </p> + <p> + After five minutes' silent contemplation, Mrs. Livermore raised her eyes + to mine. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, my dear, you need me." + </p> + <p> + And then and there we formed our plans. She is to head the committee on C + L O T H E S. She is to choose three friends to help her. And they, with + the two dozen best sewers among the girls and our sewing-teacher and five + sewing machines, are going to make over the looks of this institution. And + the charity is all on our side. We are supplying Mrs. Livermore with the + profession that Providence robbed her of. Wasn't it clever of me to find + her? I woke this morning at dawn and crowed! + </p> + <p> + Lots more news,—I could run into a second volume,—but I am + going to send this letter to town by Mr. Witherspoon, who, in a very high + collar and the blackest of evening clothes, is on the point of departure + for a barn dance at the country club. I told him to pick out the nicest + girls he danced with to come and tell stories to my children. + </p> + <p> + It is dreadful, the scheming person I am getting to be. All the time I am + talking to any one, I am silently thinking, "What use can you be to my + asylum?" + </p> + <p> + There is grave danger that this present superintendent will become so + interested in her job that she will never want to leave. I sometimes + picture her a white-haired old lady, propelled about the building in a + wheeled chair, but still tenaciously superintending her fourth generation + of orphans. + </p> + <p> + PLEASE discharge her before that day! + </p> + <p> + Yours, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Yesterday morning, without the slightest warning, a station hack drove up + to the door and disgorged upon the steps two men, two little boys, a baby + girl, a rocking horse, and a Teddy bear, and then drove off! + </p> + <p> + The men were artists, and the little ones were children of another artist, + dead three weeks ago. They had brought the mites to us because they + thought "John Grier" sounded solid and respectable, and not like a public + institution. It had never entered their unbusinesslike heads that any + formality is necessary about placing a child in an asylum. + </p> + <p> + I explained that we were full, but they seemed so stranded and aghast, + that I told them to sit down while I advised them what to do. So the + chicks were sent to the nursery, with a recommendation of bread and milk, + while I listened to their history. Those artists had a fatally literary + touch, or maybe it was just the sound of the baby girl's laugh, but, + anyway, before they had finished, the babes were ours. + </p> + <p> + Never have I seen a sunnier creature than the little Allegra (we don't + often get such fancy names or such fancy children). She is three years + old, is lisping funny baby talk and bubbling with laughter. The tragedy + she has just emerged from has never touched her. But Don and Clifford, + sturdy little lads of five and seven, are already solemn-eyed and + frightened at the hardness of life. + </p> + <p> + Their mother was a kindergarten teacher who married an artist on a capital + of enthusiasm and a few tubes of paint. His friends say that he had + talent, but of course he had to throw it away to pay the milkman. They + lived in a haphazard fashion in a rickety old studio, cooking behind + screens, the babies sleeping on shelves. + </p> + <p> + But there seems to have been a very happy side to it—a great deal of + love and many friends, all more or less poor, but artistic and congenial + and high-thinking. The little lads, in their gentleness and fineness, show + that phase of their upbringing. They have an air which many of my + children, despite all the good manners I can pour into them, will forever + lack. + </p> + <p> + The mother died in the hospital a few days after Allegra's birth, and the + father struggled on for two years, caring for his brood and painting like + mad—advertisements, anything—to keep a roof over their heads. + </p> + <p> + He died in St. Vincent's three weeks ago,—overwork, worry, + pneumonia. His friends rallied about the babies, sold such of the studio + fittings as had escaped pawning, paid off the debts, and looked about for + the best asylum they could find. And, Heaven save them! they hit upon us! + </p> + <p> + Well, I kept the two artists for luncheon,—nice creatures in soft + hats and Windsor ties, and looking pretty frayed themselves,—and + then started them back to New York with the promise that I would give the + little family my most parental attention. + </p> + <p> + So here they are, one little mite in the nursery, two in the kindergarten + room, four big packing cases full of canvases in the cellar, and a trunk + in the store room with the letters of their father and mother. And a look + in their faces, an intangible spiritual SOMETHING, that is their heritage. + </p> + <p> + I can't get them out of my mind. All night long I was planning their + future. The boys are easy. They have already been graduated from college, + Mr. Pendleton assisting, and are pursuing honorable business careers. But + Allegra I don't know about; I can't think what to wish for the child. Of + course the normal thing to wish for any sweet little girl is that two kind + foster parents will come along to take the place of the real parents that + Fate has robbed her of. But in this case it would be cruel to steal her + away from her brothers. Their love for the baby is pitiful. You see, they + have brought her up. The only time I ever hear them laugh is when she has + done something funny. + </p> + <p> + The poor little fellows miss their father horribly. I found Don, the + five-year-old one, sobbing in his crib last night because he couldn't say + good night to "daddy." + </p> + <p> + But Allegra is true to her name, the happiest young miss of three I have + ever seen. The poor father managed well by her, and she, little ingrate, + has already forgotten that she has lost him. + </p> + <p> + Whatever can I do with these little ones? I think and think and think + about them. I can't place them out, and it does seem too awful to bring + them up here; for as good as we are going to be when we get ourselves made + over, still, after all, we are an institution, and our inmates are just + little incubator chicks. They don't get the individual, fussy care that + only an old hen can give. + </p> + <p> + There is a lot of interesting news that I might have been telling you, but + my new little family has driven everything out of my mind. + </p> + <p> + Bairns are certain joy, but nae sma' care. + </p> + <p> + Yours ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. P.S. Don't forget that you are coming to visit me next week. + </p> + <p> + P.S. II. The doctor, who is ordinarily so scientific and unsentimental, + has fallen in love with Allegra. He didn't so much as glance at her + tonsils; he simply picked her up in his arms and hugged her. Oh, she is a + little witch! Whatever is to become of her? + </p> + <p> + June 22. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I may report that you need no longer worry as to our inadequate fire + protection. The doctor and Mr. Witherspoon have been giving the matter + their gravest attention, and no game yet devised has proved so + entertaining and destructive as our fire drill. + </p> + <p> + The children all retire to their beds and plunge into alert slumber. Fire + alarm sounds. They spring up and into their shoes, snatch the top blanket + from their beds, wrap it around their imaginary nightclothes, fall into + line, and trot to the hall and stairs. + </p> + <p> + Our seventeen little tots in the nursery are each in charge of an Indian, + and are bundled out, shrieking with delight. The remaining Indians, so + long as there is no danger of the roof falling, devote themselves to + salvage. On the occasion of our first drill, Percy in command, the + contents of a dozen clothes lockers were dumped into sheets and hurled out + of the windows. I usurped dictatorship just in time to keep the pillows + and mattresses from following. We spent hours resorting those clothes, + while Percy and the doctor, having lost all interest strolled up to the + camp with their pipes. + </p> + <p> + Our future drills are to be a touch less realistic. However, I am pleased + to tell you that, under the able direction of Fire Chief Witherspoon, we + emptied the building in six minutes and twenty-eight seconds. + </p> + <p> + That baby Allegra has fairy blood in her veins. Never did this institution + harbor such a child, barring one that Jervis and I know of. She has + completely subjugated the doctor. Instead of going about his visits like a + sober medical man, he comes down to my library hand in hand with Allegra, + and for half an hour at a time crawls about on a rug, pretending he's a + horse, while the bonnie wee lassie sits on his back and kicks. You know, I + am thinking of putting a card in the paper: + </p> + <p> + Characters neatly remodeled. S. McBride. + </p> + <p> + Sandy dropped in two nights ago to have a bit of conversation with Betsy + and me, and he was FRIVOLOUS. He made three jokes, and he sat down at the + piano and sang some old Scotch, "My luve's like a red, red rose," and + "Come under my plaidie," and "Wha's at the window? Wha? Wha?" not in the + least educational, and then danced a few steps of the strathspey! + </p> + <p> + I sat and beamed upon my handiwork, for it's true, I've done it all + through my frivolous example and the books I've given him and the + introducing of such lightsome companions as Jimmie and Percy and Gordon + Hallock. If I have a few more months in which to work, I shall get the man + human. He has given up purple ties, and at my tactful suggestion has + adopted a suit of gray. You have no idea how it sets him off. He will be + quite distinguished looking as soon as I can make him stop carrying bulgy + things in his pockets. + </p> + <p> + Good-by; and remember that we're expecting you on Friday. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Here is a picture of Allegra, taken by Mr. Witherspoon. Isn't she a + love? Her present clothes do not enhance her beauty, but in the course of + a few weeks she will move into a pink smocked frock. + </p> + <p> + Wednesday, June 24, 10 A.M. MRS. JERVIS PENDLETON. + </p> + <p> + Madam: + </p> + <p> + Your letter is at hand, stating that you cannot visit me on Friday per + promise, because your husband has business that keeps him in town. What + clishmaclaver is this! Has it come to such a pass that you can't leave him + for two days? + </p> + <p> + I did not let 113 babies interfere with my visit to you, and I see no + reason why you should let one husband interfere with your visit to me. I + shall meet the Berkshire express on Friday as agreed. S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + June 30. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + That was a very flying visit you paid us; but for all small favors we are + grateful. I am awfully pleased that you were so delighted with the way + things are going, and I can't wait for Jervis and the architect to get up + here and really begin a fundamental ripping-up. + </p> + <p> + You know, I had the queerest feeling all the time that you were here. I + can't make it seem true that you, my dear, wonderful Judy, were actually + brought up in this institution, and know from the bitter inside what these + little tots need. Sometimes the tragedy of your childhood fills me with an + anger that makes me want to roll up my sleeves and fight the whole world + and force it into making itself over into a place more fit for children to + live in. That Scotch-Irish ancestry of mine seems to have deposited a + tremendous amount of FIGHT in my character. + </p> + <p> + If you had started me with a modern asylum, equipped with nice, clean, + hygienic cottages and everything in running order, I couldn't have stood + the monotony of its perfect clockwork. It's the sight of so many things + crying to be done that makes it possible for me to stay. Sometimes, I must + confess, I wake up in the morning and listen to these institution noises, + and sniff this institution air, and long for the happy, carefree life that + by rights is mine. + </p> + <p> + You my dear witch, cast a spell over me, and I came. But often in the + night watches your spell wears thin, and I start the day with the burning + decision to run away from the John Grier Home. But I postpone starting + until after breakfast. And as I issue into the corridor, one of these + pathetic tots runs to meet me, and shyly slips a warm, crumpled little + fist into my hand, and looks up with wide baby eyes, mutely asking for a + little petting, and I snatch him up and hug him. And then, as I look over + his shoulder at the other forlorn little mites, I long to take all 113 + into my arms and love them into happiness. There is something hypnotic + about this working with children. Struggle as you may, it gets you in the + end. + </p> + <p> + Your visit seems to have left me in a broadly philosophical frame of mind; + but I really have one or two bits of news that I might convey. The new + frocks are marching along, and, oh, but they are going to be sweet! Mrs. + Livermore was entranced with those parti-colored bales of cotton cloth you + sent,—you should see our workroom, with it all scattered about,—and + when I think of sixty little girls, attired in pink and blue and yellow + and lavender, romping upon our lawn of a sunny day, I feel that we should + have a supply of smoked eye glasses to offer visitors. Of course you know + that some of those brilliant fabrics are going to be very fadeable and + impractical. But Mrs. Livermore is as bad as you—she doesn't give a + hang. She'll make a second and a third set if necessary. DOWN WITH CHECKED + GINGHAM! + </p> + <p> + I am glad you liked our doctor. Of course we reserve the right to say + anything about him we choose, but our feelings would be awfully hurt if + anybody else should make fun of him. + </p> + <p> + He and I are still superintending each other's reading. Last week he + appeared with Herbert Spencer's "System of Synthetic Philosophy" for me to + glance at. I gratefully accepted it, and gave him in return the "Diary of + Marie Bashkirtseff." Do you remember in college how we used to enrich our + daily speech with quotations from Marie? Well, Sandy took her home and + read her painstakingly and thoughtfully. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," he acknowledged today when he came to report, "it is a truthful + record of a certain kind of morbid, egotistical personality that + unfortunately does exist. But I can't understand why you care to read it; + for, thank God! Sally Lunn, you and Bash haven't anything in common." + </p> + <p> + That's the nearest to a compliment he ever came, and I feel extremely + flattered. As to poor Marie, he refers to her as "Bash" because he can't + pronounce her name, and is too disdainful to try. + </p> + <p> + We have a child here, the daughter of a chorus girl, and she is a + conceited, selfish, vain, posing, morbid, lying little minx, but she has + eyelashes! Sandy has taken the most violent dislike to that child. And + since reading poor Marie's diary, he has found a new comprehensive + adjective for summing up all of her distressing qualities. He calls her + BASHY, and dismisses her. + </p> + <p> + Good-by and come again. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. My children show a distressing tendency to draw out their entire bank + accounts to buy candy. + </p> + <p> + Tuesday night. My dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + What do you think Sandy has done now? He has gone off on a pleasure trip + to that psychopathic institution whose head alienist visited us a month or + so ago. Did you ever know anything like the man? He is fascinated by + insane people, and can't let them alone. + </p> + <p> + When I asked for some parting medical instructions, he replied: + </p> + <p> + "Feed a cowld and hunger a colic and put nae faith in doctors." + </p> + <p> + With that advice, and a few bottles of cod-liver oil we are left to our + own devices. I feel very free and adventurous. Perhaps you had better run + up here again, as there's no telling what joyous upheaval I may accomplish + when out from under Sandy's dampening influence. + </p> + <p> + S. THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + Here I stay lashed to the mast, while you run about the country disporting + yourself with insane people. And just as I was thinking that I had nicely + cured you of this morbid predilection for psychopathic institutions! It's + very disappointing. You had seemed almost human of late. + </p> + <p> + May I ask how long you are intending to stay? You had permission to go for + two days, and you've already been away four. + </p> + <p> + Charlie Martin fell out of a cherry tree yesterday and cut his head open, + and we were driven to calling in a foreign doctor. Five stitches. Patient + doing well. But we don't like to depend on strangers. I wouldn't say a + word if you were away on legitimate business, but you know very well that, + after associating with melancholics for a week, you will come back home in + a dreadful state of gloom, dead sure that humanity is going to the dogs; + and upon me will fall the burden of getting you decently cheerful again. + </p> + <p> + Do leave those insane people to their delusions, and come back to the John + Grier Home, which needs you. + </p> + <p> + I am most fervent' Your friend and servant, S. McB. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Don't you admire that poetical ending? It was borrowed from Robert + Burns, whose works I am reading assiduously as a compliment to a Scotch + friend. + </p> + <p> + July 6. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + That doctor man is still away. No word; just disappeared into space. I + don't know whether he is ever coming back or not, but we seem to be + running very happily without him. + </p> + <p> + I lunched yesterday CHEZ the two kind ladies who have taken our Punch to + their hearts. The young man seems to be very much at home. He took me by + the hand, and did the honors of the garden, presenting me with the + bluebell of my choice. At luncheon the English butler lifted him into his + chair and tied on his bib with as much manner as though he were serving a + prince of the blood. The butler has lately come from the household of the + Earl of Durham, Punch from a cellar in Houston Street. It was a very + uplifting spectacle. + </p> + <p> + My hostesses entertained me afterward with excerpts from their table + conversations of the last two weeks. (I wonder the butler hasn't given + notice; he looked like a respectable man.) If nothing more comes of it, at + least Punch has furnished them with funny stories for the rest of their + lives. One of them is even thinking of writing a book. "At least," says + she, wiping hysterical tears from her eyes, "we have lived!" + </p> + <p> + The Hon. Cy dropped in at 6:30 last night, and found me in an evening + gown, starting for a dinner at Mrs. Livermore's house. He mildly observed + that Mrs. Lippett did not aspire to be a society leader, but saved her + energy for her work. You know I'm not vindictive, but I never look at that + man without wishing he were at the bottom of the duck pond, securely + anchored to a rock. + </p> + <p> + Otherwise he'd pop up and float. + </p> + <p> + Singapore respectfully salutes you, and is very glad that you can't see + him as he now appears. A shocking calamity has befallen his good looks. + Some bad child—and I don't think she's a boy—has clipped that + poor beastie in spots, until he looks like a mangy, moth-eaten + checkerboard. No one can imagine who did it. Sadie Kate is very handy with + the scissors, but she is also handy with an alibi! During the time when + the clipping presumably occurred, she was occupying a stool in the corner + of the schoolroom with her face to the wall, as twenty-eight children can + testify. However, it has become Sadie Kate's daily duty to treat those + spots with your hair tonic. + </p> + <p> + I am, as usual, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. This is a recent portrait of the Hon. Cy drawn from life. The man, in + some respects, is a fascinating talker; he makes gestures with his nose. + </p> + <p> + Thursday evening. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Sandy is back after a ten-days' absence,—no explanations,—and + plunged deep into gloom. He resents our amiable efforts to cheer him up, + and will have nothing to do with any of us except baby Allegra. He took + her to his house for supper tonight and never brought her back until + half-past seven, a scandalous hour for a young miss of three. I don't know + what to make of our doctor; he grows more incomprehensible every day. + </p> + <p> + But Percy, now, is an open-minded, confiding young man. He has just been + making a dinner call (he is very punctilious in all social matters), and + our entire conversation was devoted to the girl in Detroit. He is lonely + and likes to talk about her; and the wonderful things he says! I hope that + Miss Detroit is worthy of all this fine affection, but I'm afraid. He + fetched out a leather case from the innermost recesses of his waistcoat + and, reverently unwrapping two layers of tissue-paper, showed me the + photograph of a silly little thing, all eyes and earrings and fuzzy hair. + I did my best to appear congratulatory, but my heart shut up out of pity + for the poor boy's future. + </p> + <p> + Isn't it funny how the nicest men often choose the worst wives, and the + nicest women the worst husbands? Their very niceness, I suppose, makes + them blind and unsuspicious. + </p> + <p> + You know, the most interesting pursuit in the world is studying character. + I believe I was meant to be a novelist; people fascinate me—until I + know them thoroughly. Percy and the doctor form a most engaging contrast. + You always know at any moment what that nice young man is thinking about; + he is written like a primer in big type and one-syllable words. But the + doctor! He might as well be written in Chinese so far as legibility goes. + You have heard of people with a dual nature; well, Sandy possesses a + triple one. Usually he's scientific and as hard as granite, but + occasionally I suspect him of being quite a sentimental person underneath + his official casing. For days at a time he will be patient and kind and + helpful, and I begin to like him; then without any warning an untamed wild + man swells up from the innermost depths, and—oh, dear! the + creature's impossible. + </p> + <p> + I always suspect that sometime in the past he has suffered a terrible + hurt, and that he is still brooding over the memory of it. All the time he + is talking you have the uncomfortable feeling that in the far back corners + of his mind he is thinking something else. But this may be merely my + romantic interpretation of an uncommonly bad temper. In any case, he's + baffling. + </p> + <p> + We have been waiting for a week for a fine windy afternoon, and this is + it. My children are enjoying "kite-day," a leaf taken from Japan. All of + the big-enough boys and most of the girls are spread over "Knowltop" (that + high, rocky sheep pasture which joins us on the east) flying kites made by + themselves. + </p> + <p> + I had a dreadful time coaxing the crusty old gentleman who owns the estate + into granting permission. He doesn't like orphans, he says, and if he once + lets them get a start in his grounds, the place will be infested with them + forever. You would think, to hear him talk, that orphans were a pernicious + kind of beetle. + </p> + <p> + But after half an hour's persuasive talking on my part, he grudgingly made + us free of his sheep pasture for two hours, provided we didn't step foot + into the cow pasture over the lane, and came home promptly when our time + was up. To insure the sanctity of his cow pasture, Mr. Knowltop has sent + his gardener and chauffeur and two grooms to patrol its boundaries while + the flying is on. The children are still at it, and are having a wonderful + adventure racing over that windy height and getting tangled up in one + another's strings. When they come panting back they are to have a surprise + in the shape of ginger cookies and lemonade. + </p> + <p> + These pitiful little youngsters with their old faces! It's a difficult + task to make them young, but I believe I'm accomplishing it. And it really + is fun to feel you're doing something positive for the good of the world. + If I don't fight hard against it, you'll be accomplishing your purpose of + turning me into a useful person. The social excitements of Worcester + almost seem tame before the engrossing interest of 113 live, warm, + wriggling little orphans. + </p> + <p> + Yours with love, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. I believe, to be accurate, that it's 107 children I possess this + afternoon. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + This being Sunday and a beautiful blossoming day, with a warm wind + blowing, I sat at my window with the "Hygiene of the Nervous System" + (Sandy's latest contribution to my mental needs) open in my lap, and my + eyes on the prospect without. "Thank Heaven!" thought I, "that this + institution was so commandingly placed that at least we can look out over + the cast-iron wall which shuts us in." + </p> + <p> + I was feeling very cooped-up and imprisoned and like an orphan myself; so + I decided that my own nervous system required fresh air and exercise and + adventure. Straight before me ran that white ribbon of road that dips into + the valley and up over the hills on the other side. Ever since I came I + have longed to follow it to the top and find out what lies beyond those + hills. Poor Judy! I dare say that very same longing enveloped your + childhood. If any one of my little chicks ever stands by the window and + looks across the valley to the hills and asks, "What's over there?" I + shall telephone for a motor car. + </p> + <p> + But today my chicks were all piously engaged with their little souls, I + the only wanderer at heart. I changed my silken Sunday gown for homespun, + planning meanwhile a means to get to the top of those hills. + </p> + <p> + Then I went to the telephone and brazenly called up 505. + </p> + <p> + "Good afternoon, Mrs. McGurk," said I, very sweet. "May I be speaking with + Dr. MacRae?" + </p> + <p> + "Howld the wire," said she, very short. + </p> + <p> + "Afternoon, Doctor," said I to him. "Have ye, by chance, any dying + patients who live on the top o' the hills beyant?" + </p> + <p> + "I have not, thank the Lord!" + </p> + <p> + "'Tis a pity," said I, disappointed. "And what are ye afther doin' with + yerself the day?" + </p> + <p> + "I am reading the `Origin of Species.'" + </p> + <p> + "Shut it up; it's not fit for Sunday. And tell me now, is yer motor car + iled and ready to go?" + </p> + <p> + "It is at your disposal. Are you wanting me to take some orphans for a + ride?" + </p> + <p> + "Just one who's sufferin' from a nervous system. She's taken a fixed idea + that she must get to the top o' the hills." + </p> + <p> + "My car is a grand climber. In fifteen minutes—" + </p> + <p> + "Wait!" said I. "Bring with ye a frying pan that's a decent size for two. + There's nothing in my kitchen smaller than a cart wheel. And ask Mrs. + McGurk can ye stay out for supper." + </p> + <p> + So I packed in a basket a jar of bacon and some eggs and muffins and + ginger cookies, with hot coffee in the thermos bottle, and was waiting on + the steps when Sandy chugged up with his automobile and frying pan. + </p> + <p> + We really had a beautiful adventure, and he enjoyed the sensation of + running away exactly as much as I. Not once did I let him mention + insanity. I made him look at the wide stretches of meadow and the lines of + pollard willows backed by billowing hills, and sniff the air, and listen + to the cawing crows and the tinkle of cowbells and the gurgling of the + river. And we talked—oh, about a million things far removed from our + asylum. I made him throw away the idea that he is a scientist, and pretend + to be a boy. You will scarcely credit the assertion, but he succeeded—more + or less. He did pull off one or two really boyish pranks. Sandy is not yet + out of his thirties and, mercy! that is too early to be grown up. + </p> + <p> + We camped on a bluff overlooking our view, gathered some driftwood, built + a fire, and cooked the NICEST supper—a sprinkling of burnt stick in + our fried eggs, but charcoal's healthy. Then, when Sandy had finished his + pipe and "the sun was setting in its wonted west," we packed up and + coasted back home. + </p> + <p> + He says it was the nicest afternoon he has had in years, and, poor deluded + man of science, I actually believe it's true. His olive green home is so + uncomfortable and dreary and uninspiring that I don't wonder he drowns his + troubles in books. Just as soon as I can find a nice comfortable house + mother to put in charge, I am going to plot for the dismissal of Maggie + McGurk, though I foresee that she will be even harder than Sterry to pry + from her moorings. + </p> + <p> + Please don't draw the conclusion that I am becoming unduly interested in + our bad-tempered doctor, for I'm not. It's just that he leads such a + comfortless life that I sometimes long to pat him on the head and tell him + to cheer up; the world's full of sunshine, and some of it's for him—just + as I long to comfort my hundred and seven orphans; so much and no more. + </p> + <p> + I am sure that I had some real news to tell you, but it has completely + gone out of my head. The rush of fresh air has made me sleepy. It's + half-past nine, and I bid you good night. + </p> + <p> + S. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Gordon Hallock has evaporated into thin air. Not a word for three + weeks; no candy or stuffed animals or tokimentoes of any description. What + on earth do you suppose has become of that attentive young man? + </p> + <p> + July 13. + </p> + <p> + Dearest Judy: + </p> + <p> + Hark to the glad tidings! + </p> + <p> + This being the thirty-first day of Punch's month, I telephoned to his two + patronesses, as nominated in the bond, to arrange for his return. I was + met by an indignant refusal. Give up their sweet little volcano just as + they are getting it trained not to belch forth fire? They are outraged + that I can make such an ungrateful request. Punch has accepted their + invitation to spend the summer. + </p> + <p> + The dressmaking is still going on. You should hear the machines whir and + the tongues clatter in the sewing room. Our most cowed, apathetic, + spiritless little orphan cheers up and takes an interest in life when she + hears that she is to possess three perfectly private dresses of her own, + and each a different color, chosen by herself. And you should see how it + encourages their sewing ability. Even the little ten-year-olds are + bursting into seamstresses. I wish I could devise an equally effective way + to make them take an interest in cooking. But our kitchen is extremely + uneducative. You know how hampering it is to one's enthusiasm to have to + prepare a bushel of potatoes at once. + </p> + <p> + I think you've heard me mention the fact that I should like to divide up + my kiddies into ten nice little families, with a nice comfortable house + mother over each? If we just had ten picturesque cottages to put them in, + with flowers in the front yard and rabbits and kittens and puppies and + chickens in the back, we should be a perfectly presentable institution, + and wouldn't be ashamed to have these charity experts come visiting us. + </p> + <p> + Thursday. + </p> + <p> + I started this letter three days ago, was interrupted to talk to a + potential philanthropist (fifty tickets to the circus), and have not had + time to pick up my pen since. Betsy has been in Philadelphia for three + days, being a bridesmaid for a miserable cousin. I hope that no more of + her family are thinking of getting married, for it's most upsetting to the + J. G. H. + </p> + <p> + While there, she investigated a family who had applied for a child. Of + course we haven't a proper investigating plant, but once in a while, when + a family drops right into our arms, we do like to put the business + through. As a usual thing, we work with the State Charities' Aid + Association. They have a lot of trained agents traveling about the State, + keeping in touch with families who are willing to take children, and with + asylums that have them to give. Since they are willing to work for us, + there is no slightest use in our going to the expense of peddling our own + babies. And I do want to place out as many as are available, for I firmly + believe that a private home is the best thing for the child, provided, of + course, that we are very fussy about the character of the homes we choose. + I don't require rich foster parents, but I do require kind, loving, + intelligent parents. This time I think Betsy has landed a gem of a family. + The child is not yet delivered or the papers signed, and of course there + is always danger that they may give a sudden flop, and splash back into + the water. + </p> + <p> + Ask Jervis if he ever heard of J. F. Bretland of Philadelphia. He seems to + move in financial circles. The first I ever heard of him was a letter + addressed to the "Supt. John Grier Home, Dear Sir,"—a curt, + typewritten, businesslike letter, from an AWFULLY businesslike lawyer, + saying that his wife had determined to adopt a baby girl of attractive + appearance and good health between the ages of two and three years. The + child must be an orphan of American stock, with unimpeachable heredity, + and no relatives to interfere. Could I furnish one as required and oblige, + yours truly, J. F. Bretland? + </p> + <p> + By way of reference he mentioned "Bradstreets." Did you ever hear of + anything so funny? You would think he was opening a charge account at a + nursery, and inclosing an order from our seed catalogue. + </p> + <p> + We began our usual investigation by mailing a reference blank to a + clergyman in Germantown, where the J. F. B.'s reside. + </p> + <p> + Does he own any property? + </p> + <p> + Does he pay his bills? + </p> + <p> + Is he kind to animals? + </p> + <p> + Does he attend church? + </p> + <p> + Does he quarrel with his wife? And a dozen other impertinent questions. + </p> + <p> + We evidently picked a clergyman with a sense of humor. Instead of + answering in laborious detail, he wrote up and down and across the sheet, + "I wish they'd adopt me!" + </p> + <p> + This looked promising, so B. Kindred obligingly dashed out to Germantown + as soon as the wedding breakfast was over. She is developing the most + phenomenal detective instinct. In the course of a social call she can + absorb from the chairs and tables a family's entire moral history. + </p> + <p> + She returned from Germantown bursting with enthusiastic details. + </p> + <p> + Mr. J. F. Bretland is a wealthy and influential citizen, cordially loved + by his friends and deeply hated by his enemies (discharged employees, who + do not hesitate to say that he is a HAR-RD man). He is a little shaky in + his attendance at church, but his wife seems regular, and he gives money. + </p> + <p> + She is a charming, kindly, cultivated gentlewoman, just out of a + sanatorium after a year of nervous prostration. The doctor says that what + she needs is some strong interest in life, and advises adopting a child. + She has always longed to do it, but her hard husband has stubbornly + refused. But finally, as always, it is the gentle, persistent wife who has + triumphed, and hard husband has been forced to give in. Waiving his own + natural preference for a boy, he wrote, as above, the usual request for a + blue-eyed girl. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bretland, with the firm intention of taking a child, has been reading + up for years, and there is no detail of infant dietetics that she does not + know. She has a sunny nursery, with a southwestern exposure, all ready. + And a closet full of surreptitiously gathered dolls! She has made the + clothes for them herself,—she showed them to Betsy with the greatest + pride,—so you can understand the necessity for a girl. + </p> + <p> + She has just heard of an excellent English trained nurse that she can + secure, but she isn't sure but that it would be better to start with a + French nurse, so that the child can learn the language before her vocal + cords are set. Also, she was extremely interested when she heard that + Betsy was a college woman. She couldn't make up her mind whether to send + the baby to college or not. What was Betsy's honest opinion? If the child + were Betsy's own daughter, would Betsy send her to college? + </p> + <p> + All this would be funny if it weren't so pathetic; but really I can't get + away from the picture of that poor lonely woman sewing those doll clothes + for the little unknown girl that she wasn't sure she could have. She lost + her own two babies years ago, or, rather, she never had them; they were + never alive. + </p> + <p> + You can see what a good home it's going to be. There's lots of love + waiting for the little mite, and that is better than all the wealth which, + in this case, goes along. + </p> + <p> + But the problem now is to find the child, and that isn't easy. The J. F. + Bretlands are so abominably explicit in their requirements. I have just + the baby boy to give them; but with that closetful of dolls, he is + impossible. Little Florence won't do—one tenacious parent living. + I've a wide variety of foreigners with liquid brown eyes—won't do at + all. Mrs. Bretland is a blonde, and daughter must resemble her. I have + several sweet little mites with unspeakable heredity, but the Bretlands + want six generations of church-attending grandparents, with a colonial + governor at the top. Also I have a darling little curly-headed girl (and + curls are getting rarer and rarer), but illegitimate. And that seems to be + an unsurmountable barrier in the eyes of adopting parents, though, as a + matter of fact, it makes no slightest difference in the child. However, + she won't do. The Bretlands hold out sternly for a marriage certificate. + </p> + <p> + There remains just one child out of all these one hundred and seven that + appears available. Our little Sophie's father and mother were killed in a + railroad accident, and the only reason she wasn't killed was because they + had just left her in a hospital to get an abscess cut out of her throat. + She comes from good common American stock, irreproachable and + uninteresting in every way. She's a washed-out, spiritless, whiney little + thing. The doctor has been pouring her full of his favorite cod-liver oil + and spinach, but he can't get any cheerfulness into her. + </p> + <p> + However, individual love and care does accomplish wonders in institution + children, and she may bloom into something rare and beautiful after a few + months' transplanting. So I yesterday wrote a glowing account of her + immaculate family history to J. F. Bretland, offering to deliver her in + Germantown. + </p> + <p> + This morning I received a telegram from J. F. B. Not at all! He does not + purpose to buy any daughter sight unseen. He will come and inspect the + child in person at three o'clock on Wednesday next. + </p> + <p> + Oh dear, if he shouldn't like her! We are now bending all our energies + toward enhancing that child's beauty—like a pup bound for the dog show. Do + you think it would be awfully immoral if I rouged her cheeks a suspicion? + She is too young to pick up the habit. + </p> + <p> + Heavens! what a letter! A million pages written without a break. You can + see where my heart is. I'm as excited over little Sophie's settling in + life as though she were my own darling daughter. + </p> + <p> + Respectful regards to the president. + </p> + <p> + SAL. McB. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + That was an obnoxious, beastly, low-down trick not to send me a cheering + line for four weeks just because, in a period of abnormal stress I once + let you go for three. I had really begun to be worried for fear you'd + tumbled into the Potomac. My chicks would miss you dreadfully; they love + their uncle Gordon. Please remember that you promised to send them a + donkey. + </p> + <p> + Please also remember that I'm a busier person than you. It's a lot harder + to run the John Grier Home than the House of Representatives. Besides, you + have more efficient people to help. + </p> + <p> + This isn't a letter; it's an indignant remonstrance. I'll write tomorrow—or + the next day. + </p> + <p> + S. + </p> + <p> + P.S. On reading your letter over again I am slightly mollified, but dinna + think I believe a' your saft words. I ken weel ye only flatter when ye + speak sae fair. + </p> + <p> + July 17. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I have a history to recount. + </p> + <p> + This, please remember, is Wednesday next. So at half-past two o'clock our + little Sophie was bathed and brushed and clothed in fine linen, and put in + charge of a trusty orphan, with anxious instructions to keep her clean. + </p> + <p> + At three-thirty to the minute—never have I known a human being so + disconcertingly businesslike as J. F. Bretland—an automobile of + expensive foreign design rolled up to the steps of this imposing chateau. + A square-shouldered, square-jawed personage, with a chopped-off mustache + and a manner that inclines one to hurry, presented himself three minutes + later at my library door. He greeted me briskly as "Miss McKosh." I gently + corrected him, and he changed to "Miss McKim." I indicated my most + soothing armchair, and invited him to take some light refreshment after + his journey. He accepted a glass of water (I admire a temperate parent), + and evinced an impatient desire to be done with the business. So I rang + the bell and ordered the little Sophie to be brought down. + </p> + <p> + "Hold on, Miss McGee!" said he to me. "I'd rather see her in her own + environment. I will go with you to the playroom or corral or wherever you + keep your youngsters." + </p> + <p> + So I led him to the nursery, where thirteen or fourteen mites in gingham + rompers were tumbling about on mattresses on the floor. Sophie, alone in + the glory of feminine petticoats, was ensconced in the blue-ginghamed arms + of a very bored orphan. She was squirming and fighting to get down, and + her feminine petticoats were tightly wound about her neck. I took her in + my arms, smoothed her clothes, wiped her nose, and invited her to look at + the gentleman. + </p> + <p> + That child's whole future hung upon five minutes of sunniness, and instead + of a single smile, she WHINED! + </p> + <p> + Mr. Bretland shook her hand in a very gingerly fashion and chirruped to + her as you might to a pup. Sophie took not the slightest notice of him, + but turned her back, and buried her face in my neck. He shrugged his + shoulders, supposed that they could take her on trial. She might suit his + wife; he himself didn't want one, anyway. And we turned to go out. + </p> + <p> + Then who should come toddling straight across his path but that little + sunbeam Allegra! Exactly in front of him she staggered, threw her arms + about like a windmill, and plumped down on all fours. He hopped aside with + great agility to avoid stepping on her, and then picked her up and set her + on her feet. She clasped her arms about his leg, and looked up at him with + a gurgling laugh. + </p> + <p> + "Daddy! Frow baby up!" + </p> + <p> + He is the first man, barring the doctor, whom the child has seen for + weeks, and evidently he resembles somewhat her almost forgotten father. + </p> + <p> + J. F. Bretland picked her up and tossed her in the air as handily as + though it were a daily occurrence, while she ecstatically shrieked her + delight. Then when he showed signs of lowering her, she grasped him by an + ear and a nose, and drummed a tattoo on his stomach with both feet. No one + could ever accuse Allegra of lacking vitality! + </p> + <p> + J. F. disentangled himself from her endearments, and emerged, rumpled as + to hair, but with a firm-set jaw. He set her on her feet, but retained her + little doubled-up fist. + </p> + <p> + "This is the kid for me," he said. "I don't believe I need to look any + further." + </p> + <p> + I explained that we couldn't separate little Allegra from her brothers; + but the more I objected, the stubborner his jaw became. We went back to + the library, and argued about it for half an hour. + </p> + <p> + He liked her heredity, he liked her looks, he liked her spirit, he liked + HER. If he was going to have a daughter foisted on him, he wanted one with + some ginger. He'd be hanged if he'd take that other whimpering little + thing. It wasn't natural. But if I gave him Allegra, he would bring her up + as his own child, and see that she was provided for for the rest of her + life. Did I have any right to cut her out from all that just for a lot of + sentimental nonsense? The family was already broken up; the best I could + do for them now was to provide for them individually. "Take all three," + said I, quite brazenly. + </p> + <p> + But, no, he couldn't consider that; his wife was an invalid, and one child + was all that she could manage. + </p> + <p> + Well, I was in a dreadful quandary. It seemed such a chance for the child, + and yet it did seem so cruel to separate her from those two adoring little + brothers. I knew that if the Bretlands adopted her legally, they would do + their best to break all ties with the past, and the child was still so + tiny she would forget her brothers as quickly as she had her father. + </p> + <p> + Then I thought about you, Judy, and of how bitter you have always been + because, when that family wanted to adopt you, the asylum wouldn't let you + go. You have always said that you might have had a home, too, like other + children, but that Mrs. Lippett stole it away from you. Was I perhaps + stealing little Allegra's home from her? With the two boys it would be + different; they could be educated and turned out to shift for themselves. + But to a girl a home like this would mean everything. Ever since baby + Allegra came to us, she has seemed to me just such another child as baby + Judy must have been. She has ability and spirit. We must somehow furnish + her with opportunity. She, too, deserves her share of the world's beauty + and good—as much as nature has fitted her to appreciate. And could + any asylum ever give her that? I stood and thought and thought while Mr. + Bretland impatiently paced the floor. + </p> + <p> + "You have those boys down and let me talk to them," Mr. Bretland insisted. + "If they have a spark of generosity, they'll be glad to let her go." + </p> + <p> + I sent for them, but my heart was a solid lump of lead. They were still + missing their father; it seemed merciless to snatch away that darling baby + sister, too. + </p> + <p> + They came hand in hand, sturdy, fine little chaps, and stood solemnly at + attention, with big, wondering eyes fixed on the strange gentleman. + </p> + <p> + "Come here, boys. I want to talk to you." He took each by a hand. "In the + house I live in we haven't any little baby, so my wife and I decided to + come here, where there are so many babies without fathers and mothers, and + take one home to be ours. She will have a beautiful house to live in, and + lots of toys to play with, and she will be happy all her life—much + happier than she could ever be here. I know that you will be very glad to + hear that I have chosen your little sister." + </p> + <p> + "And won't we ever see her any more?" asked Clifford. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, yes, sometimes." + </p> + <p> + Clifford looked from me to Mr. Bretland, and two big tears began rolling + down his cheeks. He jerked his hand away and came and hurled himself into + my arms. + </p> + <p> + "Don't let him have her! Please! Please! Send him away!" + </p> + <p> + "Take them all!" I begged. + </p> + <p> + But he's a hard man. + </p> + <p> + "I didn't come for an entire asylum," said he, shortly. + </p> + <p> + By this time Don was sobbing on the other side. And then who should inject + himself into the hubbub but Dr. MacRae, with baby Allegra in his arms! + </p> + <p> + I introduced them, and explained. Mr. Bretland reached for the baby, and + Sandy held her tight. + </p> + <p> + "Quite impossible," said Sandy, shortly. "Miss McBride will tell you that + it's one of the rules of this institution never to separate a family." + </p> + <p> + "Miss McBride has already decided," said J. F. B., stiffly. "We have fully + discussed the question." + </p> + <p> + "You must be mistaken," said Sandy, becoming his Scotchest, and turning to + me. "You surely had no intention of performing any such cruelty as this?" + </p> + <p> + Here was the decision of Solomon all over again, with two of the + stubbornest men that the good Lord ever made wresting poor little Allegra + limb from limb. + </p> + <p> + I despatched the three chicks back to the nursery and returned to the + fray. We argued loud and hotly, until finally J. F. B. echoed my own + frequent query of the last five months: "Who is the head of this asylum, + the superintendent or the visiting physician?" + </p> + <p> + I was furious with the doctor for placing me in such a position before + that man, but I couldn't quarrel with him in public; so I had ultimately + to tell Mr. Bretland with finality and flatness, that Allegra was out of + the question. Would he not reconsider Sophie? + </p> + <p> + No, he'd be darned if he'd reconsider Sophie. Allegra or nobody. He hoped + that I realized that I had weakly allowed the child's entire future to be + ruined. And with that parting shot he backed to the door. "Miss MacRae, + Dr. McBride, good afternoon." He achieved two formal bows and withdrew. + </p> + <p> + And the moment the door closed Sandy and I fought it out. He said that any + person who claimed to have any modern, humane views on the subject of + child-care ought to be ashamed to have considered for even a moment the + question of breaking up such a family. And I accused him of keeping her + for the purely selfish reason that he was fond of the child and didn't + wish to lose her. + </p> + <p> + (And that, I believe, is the truth.) Oh, we had the battle of our career, + and he finally took himself off with a stiffness and politeness that + excelled J. F. B.'s. + </p> + <p> + Between the two of them I feel as limp as though I'd been run through our + new mangling machine. And then Betsy came home, and reviled me for + throwing away the choicest family we have ever discovered! + </p> + <p> + So this is the end of our week of feverish activity; and both Sophie and + Allegra are, after all, to be institution children. Oh dear! oh dear! + Please remove Sandy from the staff, and send me, instead, a German, a + Frenchman, a Chinaman, if you choose—anything but a Scotchman. + </p> + <p> + Yours wearily, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. I dare say that Sandy is also passing a busy evening in writing to + have me removed. I won't object if you wish to do it. I am tired of + institutions. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + You are a captious, caviling, carping, crabbed, contentious, cantankerous + chap. Hoot mon! an' why shouldna I drap into Scotch gin I choose? An' I + with a Mac in my name. + </p> + <p> + Of course the John Grier will be delighted to welcome you on Thursday + next, not only for the donkey, but for your sweet sunny presence as well. + I was planning to write you a mile-long letter to make up for past + deficiencies, but wha's the use? I'll be seeing you the morn's morn, an' + unco gude will be the sight o' you for sair een. + </p> + <p> + Dinna fash yoursel, Laddie, because o'my language. My forebears were from + the Hielands. + </p> + <p> + McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + All's well with the John Grier—except for a broken tooth, a sprained + wrist, a badly scratched knee, and one case of pinkeye. Betsy and I are + being polite, but cool, toward the doctor. The annoying thing is that he + is rather cool, too. And he seems to be under the impression that the drop + in temperature is all on his side. He goes about his business in a + scientific, impersonal way, entirely courteous, but somewhat detached. + </p> + <p> + However, the doctor is not disturbing us very extensively at present. We + are about to receive a visit from a far more fascinating person than + Sandy. The House of Representatives again rests from its labors, and + Gordon enjoys a vacation, two days of which he is planning to spend at the + Brantwood Inn. + </p> + <p> + I am delighted to hear that you have had enough seaside, and are + considering our neighborhood for the rest of the summer. There are several + spacious estates to be had within a few miles of the John Grier, and it + will be a nice change for Jervis to come home only at week ends. After a + pleasantly occupied absence, you will each have some new ideas to add to + the common stock. + </p> + <p> + I can't add any further philosophy just now on the subject of married + life, having to refresh my memory on the Monroe Doctrine and one or two + other political topics. + </p> + <p> + I am looking eagerly forward to August and three months with you. + </p> + <p> + As ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + It's very forgiving of me to invite you to dinner after that volcanic + explosion of last week. However, please come. You remember our + philanthropic friend, Mr. Hallock, who sent us the peanuts and goldfish + and other indigestible trifles? He will be with us tonight, so this is + your chance to turn the stream of his benevolence into more hygienic + channels. + </p> + <p> + We dine at seven. + </p> + <p> + As ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + You should have lived in the days when each man inhabited a separate cave + on a separate mountain. + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + Friday, 6:30. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Gordon is here, and a reformed man so far as his attitude toward my asylum + goes. He has discovered the world-old truth that the way to a mother's + heart is through praise of her children, and he had nothing but praise for + all 107 of mine. Even in the case of Loretta Higgins he found something + pleasant to say. He thinks it nice that she isn't cross-eyed. + </p> + <p> + He went shopping with me in the village this afternoon, and was very + helpful about picking out hair-ribbons for a couple of dozen little girls. + He begged to choose Sadie Kate's himself, and after many hesitations he + hit upon orange satin for one braid and emerald green for the other. + </p> + <p> + While we were immersed in this business I became aware of a neighboring + customer, ostensibly engaged with hooks and eyes, but straining every ear + to listen to our nonsense. + </p> + <p> + She was so dressed up in a picture hat, a spotted veil, a feather boa, and + a NOUVEAU ART parasol that I never dreamed she was any acquaintance of + mine till I happened to catch her eye with a familiar malicious gleam in + it. She bowed stiffly, and disapprovingly; and I nodded back. Mrs. Maggie + McGurk in her company clothes! + </p> + <p> + That is a pleasanter expression than she really has. Her smile is due to a + slip of the pen. + </p> + <p> + Poor Mrs. McGurk can't understand any possible intellectual interest in a + man. She suspects me of wanting to marry every single one that I meet. At + first she thought I wanted to snatch away her doctor; but now, after + seeing me with Gordon, she considers me a bigamous monster who wants them + both. + </p> + <p> + Good-by; some guests approach. + </p> + <p> + 11:30 P.M. + </p> + <p> + I have just been giving a dinner for Gordon, with Betsy and Mrs. Livermore + and Mr. Witherspoon as guests. I graciously included the doctor, but he + curtly declined on the ground that he wasn't in a social mood. Our Sandy + does not let politeness interfere with truth! + </p> + <p> + There is no doubt about it, Gordon is the most presentable man that ever + breathed. He is so good looking and easy and gracious and witty, and his + manners are so impeccable—Oh, he would make a wonderfully decorative + husband! But after all, I suppose you do live with a husband. You don't + just show him off at dinners and teas. + </p> + <p> + He was exceptionally nice tonight. Betsy and Mrs. Livermore both fell in + love with him—and I just a trifle. He entertained us with a speech + in his best public manner, apropos of Java's welfare. We have been having + a dreadful time finding a sleeping place for that monkey, and Gordon + proved with incontestable logic that, since he was presented to us by + Jimmie, and Jimmie is Percy's friend, he should sleep with Percy. Gordon + is a natural talker, and an audience affects him like champagne. He can + argue with as much emotional earnestness on the subject of a monkey as on + the greatest hero that ever bled for his country. + </p> + <p> + I felt tears coming to my eyes when he described Java's loneliness as he + watched out the night in our furnace cellar, and pictured his brothers at + play in the far-off tropical jungle. + </p> + <p> + A man who can talk like that has a future before him. I haven't a doubt + but that I shall be voting for him for President in another twenty years. + </p> + <p> + We all had a beautiful time, and entirely forgot—for a space of + three hours—that 107 orphans slumbered about us. Much as I love the + little dears, it is pleasant to get away from them once in a while. + </p> + <p> + My guests left at ten, and it must be midnight by now. (This is the eighth + day, and my clock has stopped again; Jane forgets to wind it as regularly + as Friday comes around.) However, I know it's late; and as a woman, it's + my duty to try for beauty sleep, especially with an eligible young suitor + at hand. + </p> + <p> + I'll finish tomorrow. Good night. + </p> + <p> + Saturday. + </p> + <p> + Gordon spent this morning playing with my asylum and planning some + intelligent presents to be sent later. He thinks that three neatly painted + totem poles would add to the attractiveness of our Indian camps. He is + also going to make us a present of three dozen pink rompers for the + babies. Pink is a color that is very popular with the superintendent of + this asylum, who is deadly tired of blue! Our generous friend is likewise + amusing himself with the idea of a couple of donkeys and saddles and a + little red cart. Isn't it nice that Gordon's father provided for him so + amply, and that he is such a charitably inclined young man? He is at + present lunching with Percy at the hotel, and, I trust, imbibing fresh + ideas in the field of philanthropy. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps you think I haven't enjoyed this interruption to the monotony of + institution life! You can say all you please, my dear Mrs. Pendleton, + about how well I am managing your asylum, but, just the same, it isn't + natural for me to be so stationary. I very frequently need a change. That + is why Gordon, with his bubbling optimism and boyish spirits, is so + exhilarating especially as a contrast to too much doctor. + </p> + <p> + Sunday morning. + </p> + <p> + I must tell you the end of Gordon's visit. His intention had been to leave + at four, but in an evil moment I begged him to stay over till 9:30, and + yesterday afternoon he and Singapore and I took a long 'cross-country + walk, far out of sight of the towers of this asylum, and stopped at a + pretty little roadside inn, where we had a satisfying supper of ham and + eggs and cabbage. Sing stuffed so disgracefully that he has been languid + ever since. + </p> + <p> + The walk and all was fun, and a very grateful change from this monotonous + life I lead. It would have kept me pleasant and contented for weeks if + something most unpleasant hadn't happened later. We had a beautiful, + sunny, carefree afternoon, and I'm sorry to have had it spoiled. We came + back very unromantically in the trolley car, and reached the J. G. H. + before nine, just in good time for him to run on to the station and catch + his train. So I didn't ask him to come in, but politely wished him a + pleasant journey at the porte-cochere. + </p> + <p> + A car was standing at the side of the drive, in the shadow of the house. I + recognized it, and thought the doctor was inside with Mr. Witherspoon. + (They frequently spend their evenings together in the laboratory.) Well, + Gordon, at the moment of parting, was seized with an unfortunate impulse + to ask me to abandon the management of this asylum, and take over the + management of a private house instead. + </p> + <p> + Did you ever know anything like the man? He had the whole afternoon and + miles of empty meadow in which to discuss the question, but instead he + must choose our door mat! + </p> + <p> + I don't know just what I did say. I tried to turn it off lightly and hurry + him to his train. But he refused to be turned off lightly. He braced + himself against a post and insisted upon arguing it out. I knew that he + was missing his train, and that every window in this institution was open. + A man never has the slightest thought of possible overhearers. It is + always the woman who thinks of convention. + </p> + <p> + Being in a nervous twitter to get rid of him, I suppose I was pretty + abrupt and tactless. He began to get angry, and then by some unlucky + chance his eye fell on that car. He recognized it, too, and, being in a + savage mood, he began making fun of the doctor. "Old Goggle-eyes" he + called him, and "Scatchy," and oh, the awfullest lot of unmannerly, silly + things! + </p> + <p> + I was assuring him with convincing earnestness that I didn't care a rap + about the doctor, that I thought he was just as funny and impossible as he + could be, when suddenly the doctor rose out of his car and walked up to + us. + </p> + <p> + I could have evaporated from the earth very comfortably at that moment! + </p> + <p> + Sandy was quite clearly angry, as well he might be, after the things he'd + heard, but he was entirely cold and collected. Gordon was hot, and + bursting with imaginary wrongs. I was aghast at this perfectly foolish and + unnecessary muddle that had suddenly arisen out of nothing. Sandy + apologized to me with unimpeachable politeness for inadvertently + overhearing, and then turned to Gordon and stiffly invited him to get into + his car and ride to the station. + </p> + <p> + I begged him not to go. I didn't wish to be the cause of any silly quarrel + between them. But without paying the slightest attention to me, they + climbed into the car, and whirled away, leaving me placidly standing on + the door mat. + </p> + <p> + I came in and went to bed, and lay awake for hours, expecting to hear—I + don't know what kind of explosion. It is now eleven o'clock, and the + doctor hasn't appeared. I don't know how on earth I shall meet him when he + does. I fancy I shall hide in the clothes closet. + </p> + <p> + Did you ever know anything as unnecessary and stupid as this whole + situation? I suppose now I've quarreled with Gordon,—and I + positively don't know over what,—and of course my relations with the + doctor are going to be terribly awkward. I said horrid things about him,—you + know the silly way I talk,—things I didn't mean in the least. + </p> + <p> + I wish it were yesterday at this time. I would make Gordon go at four. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Sunday afternoon. + </p> + <p> + Dear Dr. MacRae: + </p> + <p> + That was a horrid, stupid, silly business last night. But by this time you + must know me well enough to realize that I never mean the foolish things I + say. My tongue has no slightest connection with my brain; it just runs + along by itself. I must seem to you very ungrateful for all the help you + have given me in this unaccustomed work and for the patience you have + (occasionally) shown. + </p> + <p> + I do appreciate the fact that I could never have run this asylum by myself + without your responsible presence in the background. And though once in a + while, as you yourself must acknowledge, you have been pretty impatient + and bad tempered and difficult, still I have never held it up against you, + and I really didn't mean any of the ill-mannered things I said last night. + Please forgive me for being rude. I should hate very much to lose your + friendship. And we are friends, are we not? I like to think so. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I am sure I haven't an idea whether or not the doctor and I have made up + our differences. I sent him a polite note of apology, which he received in + abysmal silence. He didn't come near us until this afternoon, and he + hasn't by the blink of an eyelash referred to our unfortunate contretemps. + We talked exclusively about an ichthyol salve that will remove eczema from + a baby's scalp; then, Sadie Kate being present, the conversation turned to + cats. It seems that the doctor's Maltese cat has four kittens, and Sadie + Kate will not be silenced until she has seen them. Before I knew what was + happening I found myself making an engagement to take her to see those + miserable kittens at four o'clock tomorrow afternoon. + </p> + <p> + Whereupon the doctor, with an indifferently polite bow, took himself off. + And that apparently is the end. + </p> + <p> + Your Sunday note arrives, and I am delighted to hear that you have taken + the house. It will be beautiful having you for a neighbor for so long. Our + improvements ought to march along, with you and the president at our + elbow. But it does seem as though, you ought to get out here before August + 7. Are you sure that city air is good for you just now? I have never known + so devoted a wife. + </p> + <p> + My respects to the president. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + July 22. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Please listen to this! + </p> + <p> + At four o'clock I took Sadie Kate to the doctor's house to look at those + cats. But Freddy Howland just twenty minutes before had fallen downstairs, + so the doctor was at the Howland house occupying himself with Freddy's + collarbone. He had left word for us to sit down and wait, that he would be + back shortly. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. McGurk ushered us into the library; and then, not to leave us alone, + came in herself on a pretense of polishing the brass. I don't know what + she thought we'd do! Run off with the pelican perhaps. + </p> + <p> + I settled down to an article about the Chinese situation in the Century, + and Sadie Kate roamed about at large examining everything she found, like + a curious little mongoose. + </p> + <p> + She commenced with his stuffed flamingo and wanted to know what made it so + tall and what made it so red. Did it always eat frogs, and had it hurt its + other foot? She ticks off questions with the steady persistency of an + eight-day clock. + </p> + <p> + I buried myself in my article and left Mrs. McGurk to deal with Sadie. + Finally, after she had worked half-way around the room, she came to a + portrait of a little girl occupying a leather frame in the center of the + doctor's writing desk—a child with a queer elf-like beauty, + resembling very strangely our little Allegra. This photograph might have + been a portrait of Allegra grown five years older. I had noticed the + picture the night we took supper with the doctor, and had meant to ask + which of his little patients she was. Happily I didn't! + </p> + <p> + "Who's that?" said Sadie Kate, pouncing upon it. + </p> + <p> + "It's the docthor's little gurrl." + </p> + <p> + "Where is she?" + </p> + <p> + "Shure, she's far away wit' her gran'ma." + </p> + <p> + "Where'd he get her?" + </p> + <p> + "His wife give her to him." + </p> + <p> + I emerged from my book with electric suddenness. + </p> + <p> + "His wife!" I cried. + </p> + <p> + The next instant I was furious with myself for having spoken, but I was so + completely taken off my guard. Mrs. McGurk straightened up and became + volubly conversational at once. + </p> + <p> + "And didn't he never tell you about his wife? She went insane six years + ago. It got so it weren't safe to keep her in the house, and he had to put + her away. It near killed him. I never seen a lady more beautiful than her. + I guess he didn't so much as smile for a year. It's funny he never told + you nothing, and you such a friend!" + </p> + <p> + "Naturally it's not a subject he cares to talk about," said I dryly, and I + asked her what kind of brass polish she used. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate and I went out to the garage and hunted up the kittens + ourselves; and we mercifully got away before the doctor came back. + </p> + <p> + But will you tell me what this means? Didn't Jervis know he was married? + It's the queerest thing I ever heard. I do think, as the McGurk suggests, + that Sandy might casually have dropped the information that he had a wife + in an insane asylum. + </p> + <p> + But of course it must be a terrible tragedy and I suppose he can't bring + himself to talk about it. I see now why he's so morbid over the question + of heredity—I dare say he fears for the little girl. When I think of + all the jokes I've made on the subject, I'm aghast at how I must have hurt + him, and angry with myself and angry with him. + </p> + <p> + I feel as though I never wanted to see the man again. Mercy! did you ever + know such a muddle as we are getting ourselves into? + </p> + <p> + Yours, SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Tom McCoomb has pushed Mamie Prout into the box of mortar that the + masons use. She's parboiled. I've sent for the doctor. + </p> + <p> + July 24. My dear Madam: + </p> + <p> + I have a shocking scandal to report about the superintendent of the John + Grier Home. Don't let it get into the newspapers, please. I can picture + the spicy details of the investigation prior to her removal by the + "Cruelty." + </p> + <p> + I was sitting in the sunshine by my open window this morning reading a + sweet book on the Froebel theory of child culture—never lose your + temper, always speak kindly to the little ones. Though they may appear + bad, they are not so in reality. It is either that they are not feeling + well or have nothing interesting to do. Never punish; simply deflect their + attention. I was entertaining a very loving, uplifted attitude toward all + this young life about me when my attention was attracted by a group of + little boys beneath the window. + </p> + <p> + "Aw—John—don't hurt it!" + </p> + <p> + "Let it go!" + </p> + <p> + "Kill it quick!" + </p> + <p> + And above their remonstrances rose the agonized squealing of some animal + in pain. I dropped Froebel and, running downstairs, burst upon them from + the side door. They saw me coming, and scattered right and left, revealing + Johnnie Cobden engaged in torturing a mouse. I will spare you the grisly + details. I called to one of the boys to come and drown the creature quick! + John I seized by the collar; and dragged him squirming and kicking in at + the kitchen door. He is a big, hulking boy of thirteen, and he fought like + a little tiger, holding on to posts and doorjambs as we passed. Ordinarily + I doubt if I could have handled him, but that one sixteenth Irish that I + possess was all on top, and I was fighting mad. We burst into the kitchen, + and I hastily looked about for a means of chastisement. The pancake turner + was the first utensil that met my eyes. I seized it and beat that child + with all my strength, until I had reduced him to a cowering, whimpering + mendicant for mercy, instead of the fighting little bully he had been four + minutes before. + </p> + <p> + And then who should suddenly burst into the midst of this explosion but + Dr. MacRae! His face was blank with astonishment. He strode over and took + the pancake turner out of my hand and set the boy on his feet. Johnnie got + behind him and clung! I was so angry that I really couldn't talk. It was + all I could do not to cry. + </p> + <p> + "Come, we will take him up to the office," was all the doctor said. And we + marched out, Johnnie keeping as far from me as possible and limping + conspicuously. We left him in the outer office, and went into my library + and shut the door. + </p> + <p> + "What in the world has the child done?" he asked. + </p> + <p> + At that I simply laid my head down on the table and began to cry! I was + utterly exhausted both emotionally and physically. It had taken all the + strength I possessed to make the pancake turner effective. + </p> + <p> + I sobbed out all the bloody details, and he told me not to think about it; + the mouse was dead now. Then he got me some water to drink, and told me to + keep on crying till I was tired; it would do me good. I am not sure that + he didn't pat me on the head! Anyway, it was his best professional manner. + I have watched him administer the same treatment a dozen times to + hysterical orphans. And this was the first time in a week that we had + spoken beyond the formality of "good morning"! + </p> + <p> + Well, as soon as I had got to the stage where I could sit up and laugh, + intermittently dabbing my eyes with a wad of handkerchief, we began a + review of Johnnie's case. The boy has a morbid heredity, and may be + slightly defective, says Sandy. We must deal with the fact as we would + with any other disease. Even normal boys are often cruel. A child's moral + sense is undeveloped at thirteen. + </p> + <p> + Then he suggested that I bathe my eyes with hot water and resume my + dignity. Which I did. And we had Johnnie in. He stood—by preference—through + the entire interview. The doctor talked to him, oh, so sensibly and kindly + and humanely! John put up the plea that the mouse was a pest and ought to + be killed. The doctor replied that the welfare of the human race demanded + the sacrifice of many animals for its own good, not for revenge, but that + the sacrifice must be carried out with the least possible hurt to the + animal. He explained about the mouse's nervous system, and how the poor + little creature had no means of defense. It was a cowardly thing to hurt + it wantonly. He told John to try to develop imagination enough to look at + things from the other person's point of view, even if the other person was + only a mouse. Then he went to the bookcase and took down my copy of Burns, + and told the boy what a great poet he was, and how all Scotchmen loved his + memory. + </p> + <p> + "And this is what he wrote about a mouse," said Sandy, turning to the + "Wee, sleekit, cow'rin, timorous beastie," which he read and explained to + the lad as only a Scotchman could. + </p> + <p> + Johnnie departed penitent, and Sandy redirected his professional attention + to me. He said I was tired and in need of a change. Why not go to the + Adirondacks for a week? He and Betsy and Mr. Witherspoon would make + themselves into a committee to run the asylum. + </p> + <p> + You know, that's exactly what I was longing to do! I need a shifting of + ideas and some pine-scented air. My family opened the camp last week, and + think I'm awful not to join them. They won't understand that when you + accept a position like this you can't casually toss it aside whenever you + feel like it. But for a few days I can easily manage. My asylum is wound + up like an eight-day clock, and will run until a week from next Monday at + 4 P.M., when my train will return me. Then I shall be comfortably settled + again before you arrive, and with no errant fancies in my brain. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Master John is in a happily chastened frame of mind and body. + And I rather suspect that Sandy's moralizing had the more force because it + was preceded by my pancake turner! But one thing I know—Suzanne + Estelle is terrified whenever I step into her kitchen. I casually picked + up the potato-masher this morning while I was commenting upon last night's + over-salty soup, and she ran to cover behind the woodshed door. + </p> + <p> + Tomorrow at nine I set out on my travels, after preparing the way with + five telegrams. And, oh! you can't imagine how I'm looking forward to + being a gay, carefree young thing again—to canoeing on the lake and + tramping in the woods and dancing at the clubhouse. I was in a state of + delirium all night long at the prospect. Really, I hadn't realized how + mortally tired I had become of all this asylum scenery. + </p> + <p> + "What you need," said Sandy to me, "is to get away for a little and sow + some wild oats." + </p> + <p> + That diagnosis was positively clairvoyant. I can't think of anything in + the world I'd rather do than sow a few wild oats. I'll come back with + fresh energy, ready to welcome you and a busy summer. + </p> + <p> + As ever, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Jimmie and Gordon are both going to be up there. How I wish you could + join us! A husband is very discommoding. + </p> + <p> + CAMP McBRIDE, + </p> + <p> + July 29. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + This is to tell you that the mountains are higher than usual, the woods + greener, and the lake bluer. + </p> + <p> + People seem late about coming up this year. The Harrimans' camp is the + only other one at our end of the lake that is open. The clubhouse is very + scantily supplied with dancing men, but we have as house guest an obliging + young politician who likes to dance, so I am not discommoded by the + general scarcity. + </p> + <p> + The affairs of the nation and the rearing of orphans are alike delegated + to the background while we paddle about among the lily pads of this + delectable lake. I look forward with reluctance to 7:56 next Monday + morning, when I turn my back on the mountains. The awful thing about a + vacation is that the moment it begins your happiness is already clouded by + its approaching end. + </p> + <p> + I hear a voice on the veranda asking if Sallie is to be found within or + without. + </p> + <p> + ADDIO! S. + </p> + <p> + August 3. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Back at the John Grier, reshouldering the burdens of the coming + generation. What should meet my eyes upon entering these grounds but John + Cobden, of pancake turner memory, wearing a badge upon his sleeve. I + turned it to me and read "S. P. C. A." in letters of gold! The doctor, + during my absence, has formed a local branch of the Cruelty to Animals, + and made Johnnie its president. + </p> + <p> + I hear that yesterday he stopped the workmen on the foundation for the new + farm cottage and scolded them severely for whipping their horses up the + incline! None of all this strikes any one but me as funny. + </p> + <p> + There's a lot of news, but with you due in four days, why bother to write? + Just one delicious bit I am saving for the end. + </p> + <p> + So hold your breath. You are going to receive a thrill on page 4. You + should hear Sadie Kate squeal! Jane is cutting her hair. + </p> + <p> + Instead of wearing it in two tight braids like this—our little + colleen will in the future look like this— + </p> + <p> + "Them pigtails got on my nerves," says Jane. + </p> + <p> + You can see how much more stylish and becoming the present coiffure is. I + think somebody will be wanting to adopt her. Only Sadie Kate is such an + independent, manly little creature; she is eminently fitted by nature to + shift for herself. I must save adopting parents for the helpless ones. + </p> + <p> + You should see our new clothes! I can't wait for this assemblage of + rosebuds to burst upon you. And you should have seen those blue ginghamed + eyes brighten when the new frocks were actually given out—three for + each girl, all different colors, and all perfectly private personal + property, with the owner's indelible name inside the collar. Mrs. + Lippett's lazy system of having each child draw from the wash a + promiscuous dress each week, was an insult to feminine nature. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate is squealing like a baby pig. I must go to see if Jane has by + mistake clipped off an ear. + </p> + <p> + Jane hasn't. Sadie's excellent ears are still intact. She is just + squealing on principle; the way one does in a dentist's chair, under the + belief that it is going to hurt the next instant. + </p> + <p> + I really can't think of anything else to write except my news,—so + here it is,—and I hope you'll like it. + </p> + <p> + I am engaged to be married. + </p> + <p> + My love to you both. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + November 15. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Betsy and I are just back from a GIRO in our new motor car. It undoubtedly + does add to the pleasure of institution life. The car of its own accord + turned up Long Ridge Road, and stopped before the gates of Shadywell. The + chains were up, and the shutters battened down, and the place looked + closed and gloomy and rain-soaked. It wore a sort of fall of the House of + Usher air, and didn't in the least resemble the cheerful house that used + to greet me hospitably of an afternoon. + </p> + <p> + I hate to have our nice summer ended. It seems as though a section of my + life was shut away behind me, and the unknown future was pressing awfully + close. Positively, I'd like to postpone that wedding another six months, + but I'm afraid poor Gordon would make too dreadful a fuss. Don't think I'm + getting wobbly, for I'm not. It's just that somehow I need more time to + think about it, and March is getting nearer every day. I know absolutely + that I'm doing the most sensible thing. Everybody, man or woman, is the + better for being nicely and appropriately and cheerfully married. But oh + dear! oh dear! I do hate upheavals, and this is going to be such a + world-without-end upheaval! Sometimes when the day's work is over, and I'm + tired, I haven't the spirit to rise and meet it. + </p> + <p> + And now especially since you've bought Shadywell, and are going to be here + every summer, I resent having to leave. Next year, when I'm far away, I'll + be consumed with homesickness, thinking of all the busy, happy times at + the John Grier, with you and Betsy and Percy and our grumbly Scotchman + working away cheerfully without me. How can anything ever make up to a + mother for the loss of 107 children? + </p> + <p> + I trust that Judy, junior, stood the journey into town without upsetting + her usual poise. I am sending her a bit giftie, made partly by myself and + chiefly by Jane. But two rows, I must inform you, were done by the doctor. + One only gradually plumbs the depths of Sandy's nature. After a + ten-months' acquaintance with the man, I discover that he knows how to + knit, an accomplishment he picked up in his boyhood from an old shepherd + on the Scotch moors. + </p> + <p> + He dropped in three days ago and stayed for tea, really in almost his old + friendly mood. But he has since stiffened up again to the same man of + granite we knew all summer. I've given up trying to make him out. I + suppose, however, that any one might be expected to be a bit down with a + wife in an insane asylum. I wish he'd talk about it once. It's awful + having such a shadow hovering in the background of your thoughts and never + coming out into plain sight. + </p> + <p> + I know that this letter doesn't contain a word of the kind of news that + you like to hear. But it's that beastly twilight hour of a damp November + day, and I'm in a beastly uncheerful mood. I'm awfully afraid that I am + developing into a temperamental person, and Heaven knows Gordon can supply + all the temperament that one family needs! I don't know where we'll land + if I don't preserve my sensibly stolid, cheerful nature. + </p> + <p> + Have you really decided to go South with Jervis? I appreciate your feeling + (to a slight extent) about not wanting to be separated from a husband; but + it does seem sort of hazardous to me to move so young a daughter to the + tropics. + </p> + <p> + The children are playing blind man's buff in the lower corridor. I think + I'll have a romp with them, and try to be in a more affable mood before + resuming my pen. + </p> + <p> + A BIENTOT! SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. These November nights are pretty cold, and we are getting ready to + move the camps indoors. Our Indians are very pampered young savages at + present, with a double supply of blankets and hot-water bottles. I shall + hate to see the camps go; they have done a lot for us. Our lads will be as + tough as Canadian trappers when they come in. + </p> + <p> + November 20. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Your motherly solicitude is sweet, but I didn't mean what I said. + </p> + <p> + Of course it's perfectly safe to convey Judy, junior, to the temperately + tropical lands that are washed by the Caribbean. She'll thrive as long as + you don't set her absolutely on top of the equator. And your bungalow, + shaded by palms and fanned by sea breezes, with an ice machine in the back + yard and an English doctor across the bay, sounds made for the rearing of + babies. + </p> + <p> + My objections were all due to the selfish fact that I and the John Grier + are going to be lonely without you this winter. I really think it's + entrancing to have a husband who engages in such picturesque pursuits as + financing tropical railroads and developing asphalt lakes and rubber + groves and mahogany forests. I wish that Gordon would take to life in + those picturesque countries; I'd be more thrilled by the romantic + possibilities of the future. Washington seems awfully commonplace compared + with Honduras and Nicaragua and the islands of the Caribbean. + </p> + <p> + I'll be down to wave good-by. + </p> + <p> + ADDIO! SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + November 24. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + Judy has gone back to town, and is sailing next week for Jamaica, where + she is to make her headquarters while Jervis cruises about adjacent waters + on these entertaining new ventures of his. Couldn't you engage in traffic + in the South Seas? I think I'd feel pleasanter about leaving my asylum if + you had something romantic and adventurous to offer instead. And think how + beautiful you'd be in those white linen clothes! I really believe I might + be able to stay in love with a man quite permanently if he always dressed + in white. + </p> + <p> + You can't imagine how I miss Judy. Her absence leaves a dreadful hole in + my afternoons. Can't you run up for a week end soon? I think the sight of + you would be very cheering, and I'm feeling awfully down of late. You + know, my dear Gordon, I like you much better when you're right here before + my eyes than when I merely think about you from a distance. I believe you + must have a sort of hypnotic influence. Occasionally, after you've been + away a long time, your spell wears a little thin. But when I see you, it + all comes back. You've been away now a long, long time; so, please come + fast and bewitch me over again! + </p> + <p> + S. + </p> + <p> + December 2. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Do you remember in college, when you and I used to plan our favorite + futures, how we were forever turning our faces southward? And now to think + it has really come true, and you are there, coasting around those tropical + isles! Did you ever have such a thrill in the whole of your life, barring + one or two connected with Jervis, as when you came up on deck in the early + dawn and found yourself riding at anchor in the harbor of Kingston, with + the water so blue and the palms so green and the beach so white? + </p> + <p> + I remember when I first woke in that harbor. I felt like a heroine of + grand opera surrounded by untruly beautiful painted scenery. Nothing in my + four trips to Europe ever thrilled me like the queer sights and tastes and + smells of those three warm weeks seven years ago. And ever since, I've + panted to get back. When I stop to think about it, I can hardly bring + myself to swallow our unexciting meals; I wish to be dining on curries and + tamales and mangos. Isn't it funny? You'd think I must have a dash of + Creole or Spanish or some warm blood in me somewhere, but I'm nothing on + earth but a chilly mixture of English and Irish and Scotch. Perhaps that + is why I hear the South calling. "The palm dreams of the pine, and the + pine of the palm." + </p> + <p> + After seeing you off, I turned back to New York with an awful + wander-thirst gnawing at my vitals. I, too, wanted to be starting off on + my travels in a new blue hat and a new blue suit with a big bunch of + violets in my hand. For five minutes I would cheerfully have said good-by + forever to poor dear Gordon in return for the wide world to wander in. I + suppose you are thinking they are not entirely incompatible—Gordon + and the wide world—but I don't seem able to get your point of view + about husbands. I see marriage as a man must, a good, sensible workaday + institution; but awfully curbing to one's liberty. Somehow, after you're + married forever, life has lost its feeling of adventure. There aren't any + romantic possibilities waiting to surprise you around each corner. + </p> + <p> + The disgraceful truth is that one man doesn't seem quite enough for me. I + like the variety of sensation that you get only from a variety of men. I'm + afraid I've spent too flirtatious a youth, and it isn't easy for me to + settle. + </p> + <p> + I seem to have a very wandering pen. To return: I saw you off, and took + the ferry back to New York with a horribly empty feeling. After our + intimate, gossipy three months together, it seems a terrible task to tell + you my troubles in tones that will reach to the bottom of the continent. + My ferry slid right under the nose of your steamer, and I could see you + and Jervis plainly leaning on the rail. I waved frantically, but you never + blinked an eyelash. Your gaze was fixed in homesick contemplation upon the + top of the Woolworth Building. + </p> + <p> + Back in New York, I took myself to a department store to accomplish a few + trifles in the way of shopping. As I was entering through their revolving + doors, who should be revolving in the other direction but Helen Brooks! We + had a terrible time meeting, as I tried to go back out, and she tried to + come back in; I thought we should revolve eternally. But we finally got + together and shook hands, and she obligingly helped me choose fifteen + dozen pairs of stockings and fifty caps and sweaters and two hundred union + suits, and then we gossiped all the way up to Fifty-second Street, where + we had luncheon at the Women's University Club. + </p> + <p> + I always liked Helen. She's not spectacular, but steady and dependable. + Will you ever forget the way she took hold of that senior pageant + committee and whipped it into shape after Mildred had made such a mess of + it? How would she do here as a successor to me? I am filled with jealousy + at the thought of a successor, but I suppose I must face it. + </p> + <p> + "When did you last see Judy Abbott?" was Helen's first question. + </p> + <p> + "Fifteen minutes ago," said I. "She has just set sail for the Spanish main + with a husband and daughter and nurse and maid and valet and dog." + </p> + <p> + "Has she a nice husband?" + </p> + <p> + "None better." + </p> + <p> + "And does she still like him?" + </p> + <p> + "Never saw a happier marriage." + </p> + <p> + It struck me that Helen looked a trifle bleak, and I suddenly remembered + all that gossip that Marty Keene told us last summer; so I hastily changed + the conversation to a perfectly safe subject like orphans. + </p> + <p> + But later she told me the whole story herself in as detached and + impersonal a way as though she were discussing the characters in a book. + She has been living alone in the city, hardly seeing any one, and she + seemed low in spirits and glad to talk. Poor Helen appears to have made an + awful mess of her life. I don't know any one who has covered so much + ground in such a short space of time. Since her graduation she has been + married, has had a baby and lost him, divorced her husband, quarreled with + her family, and come to the city to earn her own living. She is reading + manuscript for a publishing house. + </p> + <p> + There seems to have been no reason for her divorce from the ordinary point + of view; the marriage just simply didn't work. They weren't friends. If he + had been a woman, she wouldn't have wasted half an hour talking with him. + If she had been a man, he would have said: "Glad to see you. How are you?" + and gone on. And yet they MARRIED. Isn't it dreadful how blind this sex + business can make people? + </p> + <p> + She was brought up on the theory that a woman's only legitimate profession + is homemaking. When she finished college, she was naturally eager to start + on her career, and Henry presented himself. Her family scanned him + closely, and found him perfect in every respect—good family, good + morals, good financial position, good looking. Helen was in love with him. + She had a big wedding and lots of new clothes and dozens of embroidered + towels. Everything looked propitious. + </p> + <p> + But as they began to get acquainted, they didn't like the same books or + jokes or people or amusements. He was expansive and social and hilarious, + and she wasn't. First they bored, and then they irritated, each other. Her + orderliness made him impatient, and his disorderliness drove her wild. She + would spend a day getting closets and bureau drawers in order, and in five + minutes he would stir them into chaos. He would leave his clothes about + for her to pick up, and his towels in a messy heap on the bathroom floor, + and he never scrubbed out the tub. And she, on her side, was awfully + unresponsive and irritating,—she realized it fully,—she got to + the point where she wouldn't laugh at his jokes. + </p> + <p> + I suppose most old-fashioned, orthodox people would think it awful to + break up a marriage on such innocent grounds. It seemed so to me at first; + but as she went on piling up detail on detail each trivial in itself, but + making a mountainous total, I agreed with Helen that it was awful to keep + it going. It wasn't really a marriage; it was a mistake. + </p> + <p> + So one morning at breakfast, when the subject of what they should do for + the summer came up, she said quite casually that she thought she would go + West and get a residence in some State where you could get a divorce for a + respectable cause; and for the first time in months he agreed with her. + </p> + <p> + You can imagine the outraged feelings of her Victorian family. In all the + seven generations of their sojourn in America they have never had anything + like this to record in the family Bible. It all comes from sending her to + college and letting her read such dreadful modern people as Ellen Key and + Bernard Shaw. + </p> + <p> + "If he had only got drunk and dragged me about by the hair," Helen wailed, + "it would have been legitimate; but because we didn't actually throw + things at each other, no one could see any reason for a divorce." + </p> + <p> + The pathetic part of the whole business is that both she and Henry were + admirably fitted to make some one else happy. They just simply didn't + match each other; and when two people don't match, all the ceremonies in + the world can't marry them. + </p> + <p> + Saturday morning. + </p> + <p> + I meant to get this letter off two days ago; and here I am with volumes + written, but nothing mailed. + </p> + <p> + We've just had one of those miserable deceiving nights—cold and + frosty when you go to bed, and warm and lifeless when you wake in the + dark, smothered under a mountain of blankets. By the time I had removed my + own extra covers and plumped up my pillow and settled comfortably, I + thought of those fourteen bundled-up babies in the fresh-air nursery. + Their so-called night nurse sleeps like a top the whole night through. + (Her name is next on the list to be expunged.) So I roused myself again, + and made a little blanket removing tour, and by the time I had finished I + was forever awake. It is not often that I pass a NUIT BLANCHE; but when I + do, I settle world problems. Isn't it funny how much keener your mind is + when you are lying awake in the dark? + </p> + <p> + I began thinking about Helen Brooks, and I planned her whole life over + again. I don't know why her miserable story has taken such a hold over me. + It's a disheartening subject for an engaged girl to contemplate. I keep + saying to myself, what if Gordon and I, when we really get acquainted, + should change our minds about liking each other? The fear grips my heart + and wrings it dry. But I am marrying him for no reason in the world except + affection. I'm not particularly ambitious. Neither his position nor his + money ever tempted me in the least. And certainly I am not doing it to + find my life work, for in order to marry I am having to give up the work + that I love. I really do love this work. I go about planning and planning + their baby futures, feeling that I'm constructing the nation. Whatever + becomes of me in after life, I am sure I'll be the more capable for having + had this tremendous experience. And it IS a tremendous experience, the + nearness to humanity that an asylum brings. I am learning so many new + things every day that when each Saturday night comes I look back on the + Sallie of last Saturday night, amazed at her ignorance. + </p> + <p> + You know I am developing a funny old characteristic; I am getting to hate + change. I don't like the prospect of having my life disrupted. I used to + love the excitement of volcanoes, but now a high level plateau is my + choice in landscape. I am very comfortable where I am. My desk and closet + and bureau drawers are organized to suit me; and, oh, I dread unspeakably + the thought of the upheaval that is going to happen to me next year! + Please don't imagine that I don't care for Gordon quite as much as any man + has a right to be cared for. It isn't that I like him any the less, but I + am getting to like orphans the more. + </p> + <p> + I just met our medical adviser a few minutes ago as he was emerging from + the nursery—Allegra is the only person in the institution who is + favored by his austere social attentions. He paused in passing to make a + polite comment upon the sudden change in the weather, and to express the + hope that I would remember him to Mrs. Pendleton when I wrote. + </p> + <p> + This is a miserable letter to send off on its travels, with scarcely a + word of the kind of news that you like to hear. But our bare little orphan + asylum up in the hills must seem awfully far away from the palms and + orange groves and lizards and tarantulas that you are enjoying. + </p> + <p> + Have a good time, and don't forget the John Grier Home + </p> + <p> + and + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + December 11. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Your Jamaica letter is here, and I'm glad to learn that Judy, Junior, + enjoys traveling. Write me every detail about your house, and send some + photographs, so I can see you in it. What fun it must be to have a boat of + your own that chugs about those entertaining seas! Have you worn all of + your eighteen white dresses yet? And aren't you glad now that I made you + wait about buying a Panama hat till you reached Kingston? + </p> + <p> + We are running along here very much as usual without anything exciting to + chronicle. You remember little Maybelle Fuller, don't you—the chorus + girl's daughter whom our doctor doesn't like? We have placed her out. I + tried to make the woman take Hattie Heaphy instead,—the quiet little + one who stole the communion cup,—but no, indeed! Maybelle's + eyelashes won the day. After all, as poor Marie says, the chief thing is + to be pretty. All else in life depends on that. + </p> + <p> + When I got home last week, after my dash to New York, I made a brief + speech to the children. I told them that I had just been seeing Aunt Judy + off on a big ship, and I am embarrassed to have to report that the + interest—at least on the part of the boys—immediately + abandoned Aunt Judy and centered upon the ship. How many tons of coal did + she burn a day? Was she long enough to reach from the carriage house to + the Indian camp? Were there any guns aboard, and if a privateer should + attack her, could she hold her own? In case of a mutiny, could the captain + shoot down anybody he chose, and wouldn't he be hanged when he got to + shore? + </p> + <p> + I had ignominiously to call upon Sandy to finish my speech. I realize that + the best-equipped feminine mind in the world can't cope with the peculiar + class of questions that originate in a thirteen-year boy's brain. + </p> + <p> + As a result of their seafaring interest, the doctor conceived the idea of + inviting seven of the oldest and most alert lads to spend the day with him + in New York and see with their own eyes an oceanliner. They rose at five + yesterday morning, caught the 7:30 train, and had the most wonderful + adventure that has happened in all their seven lives. They visited one of + the big liners (Sandy knows the Scotch engineer), and were conducted from + the bottom of the hold to the top of the crow's-nest, and then had + luncheon on board. And after luncheon they visited the aquarium and the + top of the Singer Building, and took the subway uptown to spend an hour + with the birds of America in their habitats. Sandy with great difficulty + pried them away from the Natural History Museum in time to catch the 6:15 + train. Dinner in the dining-car. They inquired with great particularity + how much it was costing, and when they heard that it was the same, no + matter how much you ate, they drew deep breaths and settled quietly and + steadily to the task of not allowing their host to be cheated. The + railroad made nothing on that party, and all the tables around stopped + eating to stare. One traveler asked the doctor if it was a boarding school + he had in charge; so you can see how the manners and bearing of our lads + have picked up. I don't wish to boast, but no one would ever have asked + such a question concerning seven of Mrs. Lippett's youngsters. "Are they + bound for a reformatory?" would have been the natural question after + observing the table manners of her offspring. + </p> + <p> + My little band tumbled in toward ten o'clock, excitedly babbling a mess of + statistics about reciprocating compound engines and watertight bulkheads, + devil-fish and sky-scrapers and birds of paradise. I thought I should + never get them to bed. And, oh, but they had had a glorious day! I do wish + I could manage breaks in the routine oftener. It gives them a new outlook + on life and makes them more like normal children. Wasn't it really nice of + Sandy? But you should have seen that man's behavior when I tried to thank + him. He waved me aside in the middle of a sentence, and growlingly asked + Miss Snaith if she couldn't economize a little on carbolic acid. The house + smelt like a hospital. + </p> + <p> + I must tell you that Punch is back with us again, entirely renovated as to + manners. I am looking for a family to adopt him. + </p> + <p> + I had hoped those two intelligent spinsters would see their way to keeping + him forever, but they want to travel, and they feel he's too consuming of + their liberty. I inclose a sketch in colored chalk of your steamer, which + he has just completed. There is some doubt as to the direction in which it + is going; it looks as though it might progress backward and end in + Brooklyn. Owing to the loss of my blue pencil, our flag has had to adopt + the Italian colors. + </p> + <p> + The three figures on the bridge are you and Jervis and the baby. I am + pained to note that you carry your daughter by the back of her neck, as if + she were a kitten. That is not the way we handle babies in the J. G. H. + nursery. Please also note that the artist has given Jervis his full due in + the matter of legs. When I asked Punch what had become of the captain, he + said that the captain was inside, putting coal on the fire. Punch was + terribly impressed, as well he might be, when he heard that your steamer + burned three hundred wagonloads a day, and he naturally supposed that all + hands had been piped to the stokehole. + </p> + <p> + BOW! WOW! + </p> + <p> + That's a bark from Sing. I told him I was writing to you, and he responded + instantly. + </p> + <p> + We both send love. + </p> + <p> + Yours, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Saturday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + You were so terribly gruff last night when I tried to thank you for giving + my boys such a wonderful day that I didn't have a chance to express half + of the appreciation I felt. + </p> + <p> + What on earth is the matter with you, Sandy? You used to be a tolerably + nice man—in spots, but these last three or four months you have only + been nice to other people, never to me. We have had from the first a long + series of misunderstandings and foolish contretemps, but after each one we + seemed to reach a solider basis of understanding, until I had thought our + friendship was on a pretty firm foundation, capable of withstanding any + reasonable shock. + </p> + <p> + And then came that unfortunate evening last June when you overheard some + foolish impolitenesses, which I did not in the slightest degree mean; and + from then on you faded into the distance. Really, I have felt terribly bad + about it, and have wanted to apologize, but your manner has not been + inviting of confidence. It isn't that I have any excuse or explanation to + offer; I haven't. You know how foolish and silly I am on occasions, but + you will just have to realize that though I'm flippant and foolish and + trivial on top, I am pretty solid inside; and you've got to forgive the + silly part. The Pendletons knew that long ago, or they wouldn't have sent + me up here. I have tried hard to pull off an honest job, partly because I + wanted to justify their judgment, partly because I was really interested + in giving the poor little kiddies their share of happiness, but mostly, I + actually believe, because I wanted to show you that your first derogatory + opinion of me was ill founded. Won't you please expunge that unfortunate + fifteen minutes at the porte-cochere last June, and remember instead the + fifteen hours I spent reading the Kallikak Family? + </p> + <p> + I would like to feel that we're friends again. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Sunday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Dr. MacRae: + </p> + <p> + I am in receipt of your calling card with an eleven-word answer to my + letter on the back. I didn't mean to annoy you by my attentions. What you + think and how you behave are really matters of extreme indifference to me. + Be just as impolite as you choose. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + December 14. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + PLEASE pepper your letters with stamps, inside and out. I have thirty + collectors in the family. Since you have taken to travel, every day about + post time an eager group gathers at the gate, waiting to snatch any + letters of foreign design, and by the time the letters reach me they are + almost in shreds through the tenacity of rival snatchers. Tell Jervis to + send us some more of those purple pine trees from Honduras; likewise some + green parrots from Guatemala. I could use a pint of them! + </p> + <p> + Isn't it wonderful to have got these apathetic little things so + enthusiastic? My children are getting to be almost like real children. B + dormitory started a pillow fight last night of its own accord; and though + it was very wearing to our scant supply of linen, I stood by and beamed, + and even tossed a pillow myself. + </p> + <p> + Last Saturday those two desirable friends of Percy's spent the whole + afternoon playing with my boys. They brought up three rifles, and each man + took the lead of a camp of Indians, and passed the afternoon in a bottle + shooting contest, with a prize for the winning camp. They brought the + prize with them—an atrocious head of an Indian painted on leather. + Dreadful taste; but the men thought it lovely, so I admired it with all + the ardor I could assume. + </p> + <p> + When they had finished, I warmed them up with cookies and hot chocolate, + and I really think the men enjoyed it as much as the boys; they + undoubtedly enjoyed it more than I did. I couldn't help being in a + feminine twitter all the time the firing was going on for fear somebody + would shoot somebody else. But I know that I can't keep twenty-four + Indians tied to my apron strings, and I never could find in the whole wide + world three nicer men to take an interest in them. + </p> + <p> + Just think of all that healthy, exuberant volunteer service going to waste + under the asylum's nose! I suppose the neighborhood is full of plenty more + of it, and I am going to make it my business to dig it out. + </p> + <p> + What I want most are about eight nice, pretty, sensible young women to + come up here one night a week, and sit before the fire and tell stories + while the chicks pop corn. I do so want to contrive a little individual + petting for my babies. You see, Judy, I am remembering your own childhood, + and am trying hard to fill in the gaps. + </p> + <p> + The trustees' meeting last week went beautifully. The new women are most + helpful, and only the nice men came. I am happy to announce that the Hon. + Cy Wykoff is visiting his married daughter in Scranton. I wish she would + invite father to live with her permanently. + </p> + <p> + Wednesday. + </p> + <p> + I am in the most childish temper with the doctor, and for no very definite + reason. He keeps along his even, unemotional way without paying the + slightest attention to anything or anybody. I have swallowed more slights + during these last few months than in the whole of my life before, and I'm + developing the most shockingly revengeful nature. I spend all my spare + time planning situations in which he will be terribly hurt and in need of + my help, and in which I, with the utmost callousness, will shrug my + shoulders and turn away. I am growing into a person entirely foreign to + the sweet, sunny young thing you used to know. + </p> + <p> + Evening. + </p> + <p> + Do you realize that I am an authority on the care of dependent children? + Tomorrow I and other authorities visit officially the Hebrew Sheltering + Guardian Society's Orphan Asylum at Pleasantville. (All that's its name!) + It's a terribly difficult and roundabout journey from this point, + involving a daybreak start and two trains and an automobile. But if I'm to + be an authority, I must live up to the title. I'm keen about looking over + other institutions and gleaning as many ideas as possible against our own + alterations next year. And this Pleasantville asylum is an architectural + model. + </p> + <p> + I acknowledge now, upon sober reflection, that we were wise to postpone + extensive building operations until next summer. Of course I was + disappointed, because it meant that I won't be the center of the + ripping-up, and I do so love to be the center of ripping-ups! But, anyway, + you'll take my advice, even though I'm no longer an official head? The two + building details we did accomplish are very promising. Our new laundry + grows better and better; it has removed from us that steamy smell so dear + to asylums. The farmer's cottage will finally be ready for occupancy next + week. All it now lacks is a coat of paint and some doorknobs. + </p> + <p> + But, oh dear! oh dear! another bubble has burst! Mrs Turnfelt, for all her + comfortable figure and sunny smile, hates to have children messing about. + They make her nervous. And as for Turnfelt himself, though industrious and + methodical and an excellent gardener, still, his mental processes are not + quite what I had hoped for. When he first came, I made him free of the + library. He began at the case nearest the door, which contains + thirty-seven volumes of Pansy's works. Finally, after he had spent four + months on Pansy, I suggested a change, and sent him home with "Huckleberry + Finn." But he brought it back in a few days, and shook his head. He says + that after reading Pansy, anything else seems tame. I am afraid I shall + have to look about for some one a little more up-and-coming. But at least, + compared with Sterry, Turnfelt is a scholar! + </p> + <p> + And speaking of Sterry, he paid us a social call a few days ago, in quite + a chastened frame of mind. It seems that the "rich city feller" whose + estate he has been managing no longer needs his services; and Sterry has + graciously consented to return to us and let the children have gardens if + they wish. I kindly, but convincingly, declined his offer. + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + I came back from Pleasantville last night with a heart full of envy. + Please, Mr. President, I want some gray stucco cottages, with Luca della + Robbia figures baked into the front. They have nearly 700 children there, + and all sizable youngsters. Of course that makes a very different problem + from my hundred and seven, ranging from babyhood up. But I borrowed from + their superintendent several very fancy ideas. I'm dividing my chicks into + big and little sisters and brothers, each big one to have a little one to + love and help and fight for. Big sister Sadie Kate has to see that little + sister Gladiola always has her hair neatly combed and her stockings pulled + up and knows her lessons and gets a touch of petting and her share of + candy—very pleasant for Gladiola, but especially developing for + Sadie Kate. + </p> + <p> + Also I am going to start among our older children a limited form of + self-government such as we had in college. That will help fit them to go + out into the world and govern themselves when they get there. This shoving + children into the world at the age of sixteen seems terribly merciless. + Five of my children are ready to be shoved, but I can't bring myself to do + it. I keep remembering my own irresponsible silly young self, and + wondering what would have happened to me had I been turned out to work at + the age of sixteen! + </p> + <p> + I must leave you now to write an interesting letter to my politician in + Washington, and it's hard work. What have I to say that will interest a + politician? I can't do anything any more but babble about babies, and he + wouldn't care if every baby was swept from the face of the earth. Oh, yes, + he would, too! I'm afraid I'm slandering him. Babies—at least boy + babies—grow into voters. + </p> + <p> + Good-by, + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Dearest Judy: + </p> + <p> + If you expect a cheerful letter from me the day, don't read this. + </p> + <p> + The life of man is a wintry road. Fog, snow, rain, slush, drizzle, cold—such + weather! such weather! And you in dear Jamaica with the sunshine and the + orange blossoms! + </p> + <p> + We've got whooping cough, and you can hear us whoop when you get off the + train two miles away. We don't know how we got it—just one of the + pleasures of institution life. Cook has left,—in the night,—what + the Scotch call a "moonlight flitting." I don't know how she got her trunk + away, but it's gone. The kitchen fire went with her. The pipes are frozen. + The plumbers are here, and the kitchen floor is all ripped up. One of our + horses has the spavin. And, to crown all, our cheery, resourceful Percy is + down, down, down in the depths of despair. We have not been quite certain + for three days past whether we could keep him from suicide. The girl in + Detroit,—I knew she was a heartless little minx,—without so + much as going through the formality of sending back his ring, has gone and + married herself to a man and a couple of automobiles and a yacht. It is + the best thing that could ever have happened to Percy, but it will be a + long, long time before he realizes it. + </p> + <p> + We have our twenty-four Indians back in the house with us. I was sorry to + have to bring them in, but the shacks were scarcely planned for winter + quarters. I have stowed them away very comfortably, however, thanks to the + spacious iron verandas surrounding our new fire-escape. It was a happy + idea of Jervis's having them glassed in for sleeping porches. The babies' + sun parlor is a wonderful addition to our nursery. We can fairly see the + little tots bloom under the influence of that extra air and sunshine. + </p> + <p> + With the return of the Indians to civilized life, Percy's occupation was + ended, and he was supposed to remove himself to the hotel. But he didn't + want to remove himself. He has got used to orphans, he says, and he would + miss not seeing them about. I think the truth is that he is feeling so + miserable over his wrecked engagement that he is afraid to be alone. He + needs something to occupy every waking moment out of banking hours. And + goodness knows we're glad enough to keep him! He has been wonderful with + those youngsters, and they need a man's influence. + </p> + <p> + But what on earth to do with the man? As you discovered last summer, this + spacious chateau does not contain a superabundance of guest rooms. He has + finally fitted himself into the doctor's laboratory, and the medicines + have moved themselves to a closet down the hall. He and the doctor fixed + it up between them, and if they are willing to be mutually inconvenienced, + I have no fault to find. + </p> + <p> + Mercy! I've just looked at the calendar, and it's the eighteenth, with + Christmas only a week away. However shall we finish all our plans in a + week? The chicks are making presents for one another, and something like a + thousand secrets have been whispered in my ear. + </p> + <p> + Snow last night. The boys have spent the morning in the woods, gathering + evergreens and drawing them home on sleds; and twenty girls are spending + the afternoon in the laundry, winding wreaths for the windows. I don't + know how we are going to do our washing this week. We were planning to + keep the Christmas tree a secret, but fully fifty children have been + boosted up to the carriage house window to take a peep at it, and I am + afraid the news has spread among the remaining fifty. + </p> + <p> + At your insistence, we have sedulously fostered the Santa Claus myth, but + it doesn't meet with much credence. "Why didn't he ever come before?" was + Sadie Kate's skeptical question. But Santa Claus is undoubtedly coming + this time. I asked the doctor, out of politeness, to play the chief role + at our Christmas tree; and being certain ahead of time that he was going + to refuse, I had already engaged Percy as an understudy. But there is no + counting on a Scotchman. Sandy accepted with unprecedented graciousness, + and I had privately to unengage Percy! + </p> + <p> + Tuesday. + </p> + <p> + Isn't it funny, the way some inconsequential people have of pouring out + whatever happens to be churning about in their minds at the moment? They + seem to have no residue of small talk, and are never able to dismiss a + crisis in order to discuss the weather. + </p> + <p> + This is apropos of a call I received today. A woman had come to deliver + her sister's child—sister in a sanatorium for tuberculosis; we to + keep the child until the mother is cured, though I fear, from what I hear, + that will never be. But, anyway, all the arrangements had been made, and + the woman had merely to hand in the little girl and retire. But having a + couple of hours between trains, she intimated a desire to look about, so I + showed her the kindergarten rooms and the little crib that Lily will + occupy, and our yellow dining room, with its frieze of bunnies, in order + that she might report as many cheerful details as possible to the poor + mother. After this, as she seemed tired, I socially asked her to walk into + my parlor and have a cup of tea. Doctor MacRae, being at hand and in a + hungry mood (a rare state for him; he now condescends to a cup of tea with + the officers of this institution about twice a month), came, too, and we + had a little party. + </p> + <p> + The woman seemed to feel that the burden of entertainment rested upon her, + and by way of making conversation, she told us that her husband had fallen + in love with the girl who sold tickets at a moving picture show (a + painted, yellow-haired thing who chewed gum like a cow, was her + description of the enchantress), and he spent all of his money on the + girl, and never came home except when he was drunk. Then he smashed the + furniture something awful. An easel, with her mother's picture on it, that + she had had since before she was married, he had thrown down just for the + pleasure of hearing it crash. And finally she had just got too tired to + live, so she drank a bottle of swamp root because somebody had told her it + was poison if you took it all at once. But it didn't kill her; it only + made her sick. And he came back, and said he would choke her if she ever + tried that on him again; so she guessed he must still care something for + her. All this quite casually while she stirred her tea. + </p> + <p> + I tried to think of something to say, but it was a social exigency that + left me dumb. But Sandy rose to the occasion like a gentleman. He talked + to her beautifully and sanely, and sent her away actually uplifted. Our + Sandy, when he tries, can be exceptionally nice, particularly to people + who have no claim upon him. I suppose it is a matter of professional + etiquette—part of a doctor's business to heal the spirit as well as + the body. Most spirits appear to need it in this world. My caller has left + me needing it. I have been wondering ever since what I should do if I + married a man who deserted me for a chewing gum girl, and who came home + and smashed the bric-a-brac. I suppose, judging from the theaters this + winter, that it is a thing that might happen to any one, particularly in + the best society. + </p> + <p> + You ought to be thankful you've got Jervis. There is something awfully + certain about a man like him. The longer I live, the surer I am that + character is the only thing that counts. But how on earth can you ever + tell? Men are so good at talking! Good-by, and a merry Christmas to Jervis + and both Judies. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + P.S. It would be a pleasant attention if you would answer my letters a + little more promptly. + </p> + <p> + JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + December 29. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate has spent the week composing a Christmas letter to you, and it + leaves nothing for me to tell. Oh, we've had a wonderful time! Besides all + the presents and games and fancy things to eat, we have had hayrides and + skating parties and candy pulls. I don't know whether these pampered + little orphans will ever settle down again into normal children. + </p> + <p> + Many thanks for my six gifts. I like them all, particularly the picture of + Judy, junior; the tooth adds a pleasant touch to her smile. + </p> + <p> + You'll be glad to hear that I've placed out Hattie Heaphy in a minister's + family, and a dear family they are. They never blinked an eyelash when I + told them about the communion cup. They've given her to themselves for a + Christmas present, and she went off so happily, clinging to her new + father's hand! + </p> + <p> + I won't write more now, because fifty children are writing thank-you + letters, and poor Aunt Judy will be buried beneath her mail when this + week's steamer gets in. + </p> + <p> + My love to the Pendletons. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Singapore sends his love to Togo, and is sorry he bit him on the ear. + </p> + <p> + JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + December 30. + </p> + <p> + O DEAR, Gordon, I have been reading the most upsetting book! + </p> + <p> + I tried to talk some French the other day, and not making out very well, + decided that I had better take my French in hand if I didn't want to lose + it entirely. That Scotch doctor of ours has mercifully abandoned my + scientific education, so I have a little time at my own disposal. By some + unlucky chance I began with "Numa Roumestan," by Daudet. It is a terribly + disturbing book for a girl to read who is engaged to a politician. Read + it, Gordon dear, and assiduously train your character away from Numa's. + It's the story of a politician who is disquietingly fascinating (like + you). Who is adored by all who know him (like you). Who has a most + persuasive way of talking and makes wonderful speeches (again like you). + He is worshiped by everybody, and they all say to his wife, "What a happy + life you must lead, knowing so intimately that wonderful man!" + </p> + <p> + But he wasn't very wonderful when he came home to her—only when he + had an audience and applause. He would drink with every casual + acquaintance, and be gay and bubbling and expansive; and then return + morose and sullen and down. "Joie de rue, douleur de maison," is the + burden of the book. + </p> + <p> + I read it till twelve last night, and honestly I didn't sleep for being + scared. I know you'll be angry, but really and truly, Gordon dear, there's + just a touch too much truth in it for my entire amusement. I didn't mean + ever to refer again to that unhappy matter of August 20,—we talked + it all out at the time,—but you know perfectly that you need a bit + of watching. And I don't like the idea. I want to have a feeling of + absolute confidence and stability about the man I marry. I never could + live in a state of anxious waiting for him to come home. + </p> + <p> + Read "Numa" for yourself, and you'll see the woman's point of view. I'm + not patient or meek or long-suffering in any way, and I'm a little afraid + of what I'm capable of doing if I have the provocation. My heart has to be + in a thing in order to make it work, and, oh, I do so want our marriage to + work! + </p> + <p> + Please forgive me for writing all this. I don't mean that I really think + you'll be a "joy of the street, and sorrow of the home." It's just that I + didn't sleep last night, and I feel sort of hollow behind the eyes. + </p> + <p> + May the year that's coming bring good counsel and happiness and + tranquillity to both of us! + </p> + <p> + As ever, + </p> + <p> + S. + </p> + <p> + January 1. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Something terribly sort of queer has happened, and positively I don't know + whether it did happen or whether I dreamed it. I'll tell you from the + beginning, and I think it might be as well if you burned this letter; it's + not quite proper for Jervis's eyes. + </p> + <p> + You remember my telling you the case of Thomas Kehoe, whom we placed out + last June? He had an alcoholic heredity on both sides, and as a baby seems + to have been fattened on beer instead of milk. He entered the John Grier + at the age of nine, and twice, according to his record in the Doomsday + Book, he managed to get himself intoxicated, once on beer stolen from some + workmen, and once (and thoroughly) on cooking brandy. You can see with + what misgivings we placed him out. But we warned the family (hard-working + temperate farming people) and hoped for the best. + </p> + <p> + Yesterday the family telegraphed that they could keep him no longer. Would + I please meet him on the six o'clock train? Turnfelt met the six o'clock + train. No boy. I sent a night message telling of his non-arrival and + asking for particulars. + </p> + <p> + I stayed up later than usual last night putting my desk in order and—sort + of making up my mind to face the New Year. Toward twelve I suddenly + realized that the hour was late and that I was very tired. I had begun + getting ready for bed when I was startled by a banging on the front door. + I stuck my head out of the window and demanded who was there. + </p> + <p> + "Tommy Kehoe," said a very shaky voice. + </p> + <p> + I went down and opened the door, and that lad, sixteen years old, tumbled + in, dead drunk. Thank Heaven! Percy Witherspoon was within call, and not + away off in the Indian camp. + </p> + <p> + I roused him, and together we conveyed Thomas to our guest room, the only + decently isolated spot in the building. Then I telephoned for the doctor, + who, I am afraid, had already had a long day. He came, and we put in a + pretty terrible night. It developed afterward that the boy had brought + along with his luggage a bottle of liniment belonging to his employer. It + was made half of alcohol and half of witch hazel; and Thomas had refreshed + his journey with this! + </p> + <p> + He was in such shape that positively I didn't think we'd pull him through—and + I hoped we wouldn't. If I were a physician, I'd let such cases gently slip + away for the good of society; but you should have seen Sandy work! That + terrible lifesaving instinct of his was aroused, and he fought with every + inch of energy he possessed. + </p> + <p> + I made black coffee, and helped all I could, but the details were pretty + messy, and I left the two men to deal with him alone and went back to my + room. But I didn't attempt to go to bed; I was afraid they might be + wanting me again. Toward four o'clock Sandy came to my library with word + that the boy was asleep and that Percy had moved up a cot and would sleep + in his room the rest of the night. Poor Sandy looked sort of ashen and + haggard and done with life. As I looked at him, I thought about how + desperately he worked to save others, and never saved himself, and about + that dismal home of his, with never a touch of cheer, and the horrible + tragedy in the background of his life. All the rancor I've been saving up + seemed to vanish, and a wave of sympathy swept over me. I stretched my + hand out to him; he stretched his out to me. And suddenly—I don't + know—something electric happened. In another moment we were in each + other's arms. He loosened my hands, and put me down in the big armchair. + </p> + <p> + "My God! Sallie, do you think I'm made of iron?" he said and walked out. I + went to sleep in the chair, and when I woke the sun was shining in my eyes + and Jane was standing over me in amazed consternation. + </p> + <p> + This morning at eleven he came back, looked me coldly in the eye without + so much as the flicker of an eyelash, and told me that Thomas was to have + hot milk every two hours and that the spots in Maggie Peters's throat must + be watched. + </p> + <p> + Here we are back on our old standing, and positively I don't know but what + I dreamed that one minute in the night! + </p> + <p> + But it would be a piquant situation, wouldn't it, if Sandy and I should + discover that we were falling in love with each other, he with a perfectly + good wife in the insane asylum and I with an outraged fiance in + Washington? I don't know but what the wisest thing for me to do is to + resign at once and take myself home, where I can placidly settle down to a + few months of embroidering "S McB" on table-cloths, like any other + respectable engaged girl. + </p> + <p> + I repeat very firmly that this letter isn't for Jervis's consumption. Tear + it into little pieces and scatter them in the Caribbean. + </p> + <p> + S. + </p> + <p> + January 3. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + You are right to be annoyed. I know I'm not a satisfactory love letter + writer. I have only to glance at the published correspondence of Elizabeth + Barrett and Robert Browning to realize that the warmth of my style is not + up to standard. But you know already—you have known a long time—that + I am not a very emotional person. I suppose I might write a lot of such + things as: "Every waking moment you are in my thoughts." "My dear boy, I + only live when you are near." But it wouldn't be absolutely true. You + don't fill all my thoughts; 107 orphans do that. And I really am quite + comfortably alive whether you are here or not. I have to be natural. You + surely don't want me to pretend more desolation than I feel. But I do love + to see you,—you know that perfectly,—and I am disappointed + when you can't come. I fully appreciate all your charming qualities, but, + my dear boy, I CAN'T be sentimental on paper. I am always thinking about + the hotel chambermaid who reads the letters you casually leave on your + bureau. You needn't expostulate that you carry them next your heart, for I + know perfectly well that you don't. + </p> + <p> + Forgive me for that last letter if it hurt your feelings. Since I came to + this asylum I am extremely touchy on the subject of drink. You would be, + too, if you had seen what I have seen. Several of my chicks are the sad + result of alcoholic parents, and they are never going to have a fair + chance all their lives. You can't look about a place like this without + "aye keeping up a terrible thinking." + </p> + <p> + You are right, I am afraid, about its being a woman's trick to make a + great show of forgiving a man, and then never letting him hear the end of + it. Well, Gordon, I positively don't know what the word "forgiving" means. + It can't include "forgetting," for that is a physiological process, and + does not result from an act of the will. We all have a collection of + memories that we would happily lose, but somehow those are just the ones + that insist upon sticking. If "forgiving" means promising never to speak + of a thing again, I can doubtless manage that. But it isn't always the + wisest way to shut an unpleasant memory inside you. It grows and grows, + and runs all through you like a poison. + </p> + <p> + Oh dear! I really didn't mean to be saying all this. I try to be the + cheerful, carefree (and somewhat light-headed) Sallie you like best; but + I've come in touch with a great deal of REALNESS during this last year, + and I'm afraid I've grown into a very different person from the girl you + fell in love with. I'm no longer a gay young thing playing with life. I + know it pretty thoroughly now, and that means that I can't be always + laughing. + </p> + <p> + I know this is another beastly uncheerful letter,—as bad as the + last, and maybe worse,—but if you knew what we've just been through! + A boy—sixteen—of unspeakable heredity has nearly poisoned + himself with a disgusting mixture of alcohol and witch hazel. We have been + working three days over him, and are just sure now that he is going to + recuperate sufficiently to do it again! "It's a gude warld, but they're + ill that's in 't." + </p> + <p> + Please excuse that Scotch—it slipped out. Please excuse everything. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + January 11. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + I hope my two cablegrams didn't give you too terrible a shock. I would + have waited to let the first news come by letter, with a chance for + details, but I was so afraid you might hear it in some indirect way. The + whole thing is dreadful enough, but no lives were lost, and only one + serious accident. We can't help shuddering at the thought of how much + worse it might have been, with over a hundred sleeping children in this + firetrap of a building. That new fire escape was absolutely useless. The + wind was blowing toward it, and the flames simply enveloped it. We saved + them all by the center stairs—but I'll begin at the beginning, and + tell the whole story. + </p> + <p> + It had rained all day Friday, thanks to a merciful Providence, and the + roofs were thoroughly soaked. Toward night it began to freeze, and the + rain turned to sleet. By ten o'clock, when I went to bed the wind was + blowing a terrible gale from the northwest, and everything loose about the + building was banging and rattling. About two o'clock I suddenly started + wide awake, with a bright light in my eyes. I jumped out of bed and ran to + the window. The carriage house was a mass of flames, and a shower of + sparks was sweeping over our eastern wing. I ran to the bathroom and + leaned out of the window. I could see that the roof over the nursery was + already blazing in half a dozen places. + </p> + <p> + Well, my dear, my heart just simply didn't beat for as much as a minute. I + thought of those seventeen babies up under that roof, and I couldn't + swallow. I finally managed to get my shaking knees to work again, and I + dashed back to the hall, grabbing my automobile coat as I ran. + </p> + <p> + I drummed on Betsy's and Miss Matthews' and Miss Snaith's doors, just as + Mr. Witherspoon, who had also been wakened by the light, came tumbling + upstairs three steps at a time, struggling into an overcoat as he ran. + </p> + <p> + "Get all the children down to the dining room, babies first," I gasped. + "I'll turn in the alarm." + </p> + <p> + He dashed on up to the third floor while I ran to the telephone—and + oh, I thought I'd never get Central! She was sound asleep. + </p> + <p> + "The John Grier Home is burning! Turn in the fire alarm and rouse the + village. Give me 505," I said. + </p> + <p> + In one second I had the doctor. Maybe I wasn't glad to hear his cool, + unexcited voice! + </p> + <p> + "We're on fire!" I cried. "Come quick, and bring all the men you can!" + </p> + <p> + "I'll be there in fifteen minutes. Fill the bathtubs with water and put in + blankets." And he hung up. + </p> + <p> + I dashed back to the hall. Betsy was ringing our fire bell, and Percy had + already routed out his Indian tribes in dormitories B and C. + </p> + <p> + Our first thought was not to stop the fire, but to get the children to a + place of safety. We began in G, and went from crib to crib, snatching a + baby and a blanket, and rushing them to the door, and handing them out to + the Indians, who lugged them downstairs. Both G and F were full of smoke, + and the children so dead asleep that we couldn't rouse them to a walking + state. + </p> + <p> + Many times during the next hour did I thank Providence—and Percy + Witherspoon—for those vociferous fire drills we have suffered + weekly. The twenty-four oldest boys, under his direction, never lost their + heads for a second. They divided into four tribes, and sprang to their + posts like little soldiers. + </p> + <p> + Two tribes helped in the work of clearing the dormitories and keeping the + terrified children in order. One tribe worked the hose from the cupola + tank until the firemen came, and the rest devoted themselves to salvage. + They spread sheets on the floor, dumped the contents of lockers and bureau + drawers into them, and bundled them down the stairs. All of the extra + clothes were saved except those the children had actually been wearing the + day before, and most of the staff's things. But clothes, bedding—everything + belonging to G and F went. The rooms were too full of smoke to make it + safe to enter after we had got out the last child. + </p> + <p> + By the time the doctor arrived with Luellen and two neighbors he had + picked up, we were marching the last dormitory down to the kitchen, the + most remote corner from the fire. The poor chicks were mainly barefooted + and wrapped in blankets. We told them to bring their clothes when we + wakened them, but in their fright they thought only of getting out. + </p> + <p> + By this time the halls were so full of smoke we could scarcely breathe. It + looked as though the whole building would go, though the wind was blowing + away from my west wing. + </p> + <p> + Another automobile full of retainers from Knowltop came up almost + immediately, and they all fell to fighting the fire. The regular fire + department didn't come for ten minutes after that. You see, they have only + horses, and we are three miles out, and the roads pretty bad. It was a + dreadful night, cold and sleety, and such a wind blowing that you could + scarcely stand up. The men climbed out on the roof, and worked in their + stocking feet to keep from slipping off. They beat out the sparks with wet + blankets, and chopped, and squirted that tankful of water, and behaved + like heroes. + </p> + <p> + The doctor meanwhile took charge of the children. Our first thought was to + get them away to a place of safety, for if the whole building should go, + we couldn't march them out of doors into that awful wind, with only their + night clothes and blankets for protection. By this time several more + automobiles full of men had come, and we requisitioned the cars. + </p> + <p> + Knowltop had providentially been opened for the week end in order to + entertain a house party in honor of the old gentleman's sixty-seventh + birthday. He was one of the first to arrive, and he put his entire place + at our disposal. It was the nearest refuge, and we accepted it + instantaneously. We bundled our twenty littlest tots into cars, and ran + them down to the house. The guests, who were excitedly dressing in order + to come to the fire, received the chicks and tucked them away into their + own beds. This pretty well filled up all the available house room, but Mr. + Reimer (Mr. Knowltop's family name) has just built a big new stucco barn, + with a garage hitched to it, all nicely heated, and ready for us. + </p> + <p> + After the babies were disposed of in the house, those helpful guests got + to work and fixed the barn to receive the next older kiddies. They covered + the floor with hay, and spread blankets and carriage robes over it, and + bedded down thirty of the children in rows like little calves. Miss + Matthews and a nurse went with them, administered hot milk all around, and + within half an hour the tots were sleeping as peacefully as in their + little cribs. + </p> + <p> + But meanwhile we at the house were having sensations. The doctor's first + question upon arrival had been: + </p> + <p> + "You've counted the children? You know they're all here?" + </p> + <p> + "We've made certain that every dormitory was empty before we left it," I + replied. + </p> + <p> + You see, they couldn't be counted in that confusion. Twenty or so of the + boys were still in the dormitories, working under Percy Witherspoon to + save clothing and furniture, and the older girls were sorting over bushels + of shoes and trying to fit them to the little ones, who were running about + underfoot and wailing dismally. + </p> + <p> + Well, after we had loaded and despatched about seven car loads of + children, the doctor suddenly called out: + </p> + <p> + "Where's Allegra?" + </p> + <p> + There was a horrified silence. No one had seen her. And then Miss Snaith + stood up and SHRIEKED. Betsy took her by the shoulders, and shook her into + coherence. + </p> + <p> + It seems that she had thought Allegra was coming down with a cough, and in + order to get her out of the cold, had moved her crib from the fresh air + nursery into the store room—and then forgotten it. + </p> + <p> + Well, my dear, you know where the store room is! We simply stared at one + another with white faces. By this time the whole east wing was gutted and + the third-floor stairs in flames. There didn't seem a chance that the + child was still alive. The doctor was the first to move. He snatched up a + wet blanket that was lying in a soppy pile on the floor of the hall and + sprang for the stairs. We yelled to him to come back. It simply looked + like suicide; but he kept on, and disappeared into the smoke. I dashed + outside and shouted to the firemen on the roof. The store room window was + too little for a man to go through, and they hadn't opened it for fear of + creating a draft. + </p> + <p> + I can't describe what happened in the next agonizing ten minutes. The + third-floor stairs fell in with a crash and a burst of flame about five + seconds after the doctor passed over them. We had given him up for lost + when a shout went up from the crowd on the lawn, and he appeared for an + instant at one of those dormer windows in the attic, and called for the + firemen to put up a ladder. Then he disappeared, and it seemed to us that + they'd never get that ladder in place; but they finally did, and two men + went up. The opening of the window had created a draft, and they were + almost overpowered by the volume of smoke that burst out at the top. After + an eternity the doctor appeared again with a white bundle in his arms. He + passed it out to the men, and then he staggered back and dropped out of + sight! + </p> + <p> + I don't know what happened for the next few minutes; I turned away and + shut my eyes. Somehow or other they got him out and halfway down the + ladder, and then they let him slip. You see, he was unconscious from all + the smoke he'd swallowed, and the ladder was slippery with ice and + terribly wobbly. Anyway, when I looked again he was lying in a heap on the + ground, with the crowd all running, and somebody yelling to give him air. + They thought at first he was dead. But Dr. Metcalf from the village + examined him, and said his leg was broken, and two ribs, and that aside + from that he seemed whole. He was still unconscious when they put him on + two of the baby mattresses that had been thrown out of the windows and + laid him in the wagon that brought the ladders and started him home. + </p> + <p> + And the rest of us, left behind, kept right on with the work as though + nothing had happened. The queer thing about a calamity like this is that + there is so much to be done on every side that you don't have a moment to + think, and you don't get any of your values straightened out until + afterward. The doctor, without a moment's hesitation, had risked his life + to save Allegra. It was the bravest thing I ever saw, and yet the whole + business occupied only fifteen minutes out of that dreadful night. At the + time, it was just an incident. + </p> + <p> + And he saved Allegra. She came out of that blanket with rumpled hair and a + look of pleased surprise at the new game of peek-a-boo. She was smiling! + The child's escape was little short of a miracle. The fire had started + within three feet of her wall, but owing to the direction of the wind, it + had worked away from her. If Miss Snaith had believed a little more in + fresh air and had left the window open, the fire would have eaten back. + But fortunately Miss Snaith does not believe in fresh air, and no such + thing happened. If Allegra had gone, I never should have forgiven myself + for not letting the Bretlands take her, and I know that Sandy wouldn't. + </p> + <p> + Despite all the loss, I can't be anything but happy when I think of the + two horrible tragedies that have been averted. For seven minutes, while + the doctor was penned in that blazing third floor, I lived through the + agony of believing them both gone, and I start awake in the night + trembling with horror. + </p> + <p> + But I'll try to tell you the rest. The firemen and the volunteers—particularly + the chauffeur and stablemen from Knowltop—worked all night in an + absolute frenzy. Our newest negro cook, who is a heroine in her own right, + went out and started the laundry fire and made up a boilerful of coffee. + It was her own idea. The non-combatants served it to the firemen when they + relieved one another for a few minutes' rest, and it helped. + </p> + <p> + We got the remainder of the children off to various hospitable houses, + except the older boys, who worked all night as well as any one. It was + absolutely inspiring to see the way this entire township turned out and + helped. People who haven't appeared to know that the asylum existed came + in the middle of the night and put their whole houses at our disposal. + They took the children in, gave them hot baths and hot soup, and tucked + them into bed. And so far as I can make out, not one of my one hundred and + seven chicks is any the worse for hopping about on drenched floors in + their bare feet, not even the whooping cough cases. + </p> + <p> + It was broad daylight before the fire was sufficiently under control to + let us know just what we had saved. I will report that my wing is entirely + intact, though a little smoky, and the main corridor is pretty nearly all + right up to the center staircase; after that everything is charred and + drenched. The east wing is a blackened, roofless shell. Your hated Ward F, + dear Judy, is gone forever. I wish that you could obliterate it from your + mind as absolutely as it is obliterated from the earth. Both in substance + and in spirit the old John Grier is done for. + </p> + <p> + I must tell you something funny. I never saw so many funny things in my + life as happened through that night. When everybody there was in extreme + negligee, most of the men in pajamas and ulsters, and all of them without + collars, the Hon. Cyrus Wykoff put in a tardy appearance, arrayed as for + an afternoon tea. He wore a pearl scarf pin and white spats! But he really + was extremely helpful. He put his entire house at our disposal, and I + turned over to him Miss Snaith in a state of hysterics; and her nerves so + fully occupied him that he didn't get in our way the whole night through. + </p> + <p> + I can't write any more details now; I've never been so rushed in the whole + of my life. I'll just assure you that there's no slightest reason for you + to cut your trip short. Five trustees were on the spot early Saturday + morning, and we are all working like mad to get affairs into some + semblance of order. Our asylum at the present moment is scattered over the + entire township; but don't be unduly anxious. We know where all the + children are. None of them is permanently mislaid. I didn't know that + perfect strangers could be so kind. My opinion of the human race has gone + up. + </p> + <p> + I haven't seen the doctor. They telegraphed to New York for a surgeon, who + set his leg. The break was pretty bad, and will take time. They don't + think there are any internal injuries, though he is awfully battered up. + As soon as we are allowed to see him I will send more detailed + particulars. I really must stop if I am to catch tomorrow's steamer. + </p> + <p> + Good-by. Don't worry. There are a dozen silver linings to this cloud that + I'll write about tomorrow. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + Good heavens! here comes an automobile with J. F. Bretland in it! + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + January 14. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Listen to this! J. F. Bretland read about our fire in a New York paper (I + will say that the metropolitan press made the most of details), and he + posted up here in a twitter of anxiety. His first question as he tumbled + across our blackened threshold was, + </p> + <p> + "Is Allegra safe?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said I. + </p> + <p> + "Thank God!" he cried, and dropped into a chair. "This is no place for + children," he said severely, "and I have come to take her home. I want the + boys, too," he added hastily before I had a chance to speak. "My wife and + I have talked it over, and we have decided that since we are going to the + trouble of starting a nursery, we might as well run it for three as for + one." + </p> + <p> + I led him up to my library, where our little family has been domiciled + since the fire, and ten minutes later, when I was called down to confer + with the trustees, I left J. F. Bretland with his new daughter on his knee + and a son leaning against each arm, the proudest father in the United + States. + </p> + <p> + So, you see, our fire has accomplished one thing: those three children are + settled for life. It is almost worth the loss. + </p> + <p> + But I don't believe I told you how the fire started. There are so many + things I haven't told you that my arm aches at the thought of writing them + all. Sterry, we have since discovered, was spending the week end as our + guest. After a bibulous evening passed at "Jack's Place," he returned to + our carriage house, climbed in through a window, lighted a candle, made + himself comfortable, and dropped asleep. He must have forgotten to put out + the candle; anyway, the fire happened, and Sterry just escaped with his + life. He is now in the town hospital, bathed in sweet oil, and painfully + regretting his share in our troubles. + </p> + <p> + I am pleased to learn that our insurance was pretty adequate, so the money + loss won't be so tremendous, after all. As for other kinds of loss, there + aren't any! Actually, nothing but gain so far as I can make out, barring, + of course, our poor smashed-up doctor. Everybody has been wonderful; I + didn't know that so much charity and kindness existed in the human race. + Did I ever say anything against trustees? I take it back. Four of them + posted up from New York the morning after the fire, and all of the local + people have been wonderful. Even the Hon. Cy has been so occupied in + remaking the morals of the five orphans quartered upon him that he hasn't + caused any trouble at all. + </p> + <p> + The fire occurred early Saturday morning, and Sunday the ministers in all + the churches called for volunteers to accept in their houses one or two + children as guests for three weeks, until the asylum could get its plant + into working order again. + </p> + <p> + It was inspiring to see the response. Every child was disposed of within + half an hour. And consider what that means for the future: every one of + those families is going to take a personal interest in this asylum from + now on. Also, consider what it means for the children. They are finding + out how a real family lives, and this is the first time that dozens of + them have ever crossed the threshold of a private house. + </p> + <p> + As for more permanent plans to take us through the winter, listen to all + this. The country club has a caddies' clubhouse which they don't use in + winter and which they have politely put at our disposal. It joins our land + on the back, and we are fitting it up for fourteen children, with Miss + Matthews in charge. Our dining room and kitchen still being intact, they + will come here for meals and school, returning home at night all the + better for half a mile walk. "The Pavilion on the Links" we are calling + it. + </p> + <p> + Then that nice motherly Mrs. Wilson, next door to the doctor's,—she + who has been so efficient with our little Loretta,—has agreed to + take in five more at four dollars a week each. I am leaving with her some + of the most promising older girls who have shown housekeeping instincts, + and would like to learn cooking on a decently small scale. Mrs. Wilson and + her husband are such a wonderful couple, thrifty and industrious and + simple and loving, I think it would do the girls good to observe them. A + training class in wifehood! + </p> + <p> + I told you about the Knowltop people on the east of us, who took in + forty-seven youngsters the night of the fire, and how their entire house + party turned themselves into emergency nursemaids? We relieved them of + thirty-six the next day, but they still have eleven. Did I ever call Mr. + Knowltop a crusty old curmudgeon? I take it back. I beg his pardon. He's a + sweet lamb. Now, in the time of our need, what do you think that blessed + man has done? He has fitted up an empty tenant house on the estate for our + babies, has himself engaged an English trained baby nurse to take charge, + and furnishes them with the superior milk from his own model dairy. He + says he has been wondering for years what to do with that milk. He can't + afford to sell it, because he loses four cents on every quart! + </p> + <p> + The twelve older girls from dormitory A I am putting into the farmer's new + cottage. The poor Turnfelts, who had occupied it just two days, are being + shoved on into the village. But they wouldn't be any good in looking after + the children, and I need their room. Three or four of these girls have + been returned from foster homes as intractable, and they require pretty + efficient supervision. So what do you think I've done? Telegraphed to + Helen Brooks to chuck the publishers and take charge of my girls instead. + You know she will be wonderful with them. She accepted provisionally. Poor + Helen has had enough of this irrevocable contract business; she wants + everything in life to be on trial! + </p> + <p> + For the older boys something particularly nice has happened; we have + received a gift of gratitude from J. F. Bretland. He went down to thank + the doctor for Allegra. They had a long talk about the needs of the + institution, and J. F. B. came back and gave me a check for $3000 to build + the Indian camps on a substantial scale. He and Percy and the village + architect have drawn up plans, and in two weeks, we hope, the tribes will + move into winter quarters. + </p> + <p> + What does it matter if my one hundred and seven children have been burned + out, since they live in such a kind-hearted world as this? + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + I suppose you are wondering why I don't vouchsafe some details about the + doctor's condition. I can't give any first-hand information, since he + won't see me. However, he has seen everybody except me—Betsy, + Allegra, Mrs. Livermore, Mr. Bretland, Percy, various trustees. They all + report that he is progressing as comfortably as could be expected with two + broken ribs and a fractured fibula. That, I believe, is the professional + name of the particular leg bone he broke. He doesn't like to have a fuss + made over him, and he won't pose gracefully as a hero. I myself, as + grateful head of this institution, called on several different occasions + to present my official thanks, but I was invariably met at the door with + word that he was sleeping and did not wish to be disturbed. The first two + times I believed Mrs. McGurk; after that—well, I know our doctor! So + when it came time to send our little maid to prattle her unconscious + good-bys to the man who had saved her life, I despatched her in charge of + Betsy. + </p> + <p> + I haven't an idea what is the matter with the man. He was friendly enough + last week, but now, if I want an opinion from him, I have to send Percy to + extract it. I do think that he might see me as the superintendent of the + asylum, even if he doesn't wish our acquaintance to be on a personal + basis. There is no doubt about it, our Sandy is Scotch! + </p> + <p> + LATER. + </p> + <p> + It is going to require a fortune in stamps to get this letter to Jamaica, + but I do want you to know all the news, and we have never had so many + exhilarating things happen since 1876, when we were founded. This fire has + given us such a shock that we are going to be more alive for years to + come. I believe that every institution ought to be burned to the ground + every twenty-five years in order to get rid of old-fashioned equipment and + obsolete ideas. I am superlatively glad now that we didn't spend Jervis's + money last summer; it would have been intensively tragic to have had that + burn. I don't mind so much about John Grier's, since he made it in a + patent medicine which, I hear, contained opium. + </p> + <p> + As to the remnant of us that the fire left behind, it is already boarded + up and covered with tar-paper, and we are living along quite comfortably + in our portion of a house. It affords sufficient room for the staff and + the children's dining room and kitchen, and more permanent plans can be + made later. + </p> + <p> + Do you perceive what has happened to us? The good Lord has heard my + prayer, and the John Grier Home is a cottage institution! + </p> + <p> + I am, + </p> + <p> + The busiest person north of the equator, + </p> + <p> + S. McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + January 16. + </p> + <p> + Dear Gordon: + </p> + <p> + Please, please behave yourself, and don't make things harder than they + are. It's absolutely out of the question for me to give up the asylum this + instant. You ought to realize that I can't abandon my chicks just when + they are so terribly in need of me. Neither am I ready to drop this + blasted philanthropy. (You can see how your language looks in my + handwriting!) + </p> + <p> + You have no cause to worry. I am not overworking. I am enjoying it; never + was so busy and happy in my life. The papers made the fire out much more + lurid than it really was. That picture of me leaping from the roof with a + baby under each arm was overdrawn. One or two of the children have sore + throats, and our poor doctor is in a plaster cast. But we're all alive, + thank Heaven! and are going to pull through without permanent scars. + </p> + <p> + I can't write details now; I'm simply rushed to death. And don't come—please! + Later, when things have settled just a little, you and I must have a talk + about you and me, but I want time to think about it first. + </p> + <p> + S. + </p> + <p> + January 21. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Helen Brooks is taking hold of those fourteen fractious girls in a most + masterly fashion. The job is quite the toughest I had to offer, and she + likes it. I think she is going to be a valuable addition to our staff. + </p> + <p> + And I forgot to tell you about Punch. When the fire occurred, those two + nice women who kept him all summer were on the point of catching a train + for California—and they simply tucked him under their arms, along + with their luggage, and carried him off. So Punch spends the winter in + Pasadena and I rather fancy he is theirs for good. Do you wonder that I am + in an exalted mood over all these happenings? + </p> + <p> + LATER. + </p> + <p> + Poor bereaved Percy has just been spending the evening with me, because I + am supposed to understand his troubles. Why must I be supposed to + understand everybody's troubles? It's awfully wearing to be pouring out + sympathy from an empty heart. The poor boy at present is pretty low, but I + rather suspect—with Betsy's aid—that he will pull through. He + is just on the edge of falling in love with Betsy, but he doesn't know it. + He's in the stage now where he's sort of enjoying his troubles. He feels + himself a tragic hero, a man who has suffered deeply. But I notice that + when Betsy is about, he offers cheerful assistance in whatever work is + toward. + </p> + <p> + Gordon telegraphed today that he is coming tomorrow. I am dreading the + interview, for I know we are going to have an altercation. He wrote the + day after the fire and begged me to "chuck the asylum" and get married + immediately, and now he's coming to argue it out. I can't make him + understand that a job involving the happiness of one hundred or so + children can't be chucked with such charming insouciance. I tried my best + to keep him away, but, like the rest of his sex, he's stubborn. Oh dear, I + don't know what's ahead of us! I wish I could glance into next year for a + moment. + </p> + <p> + The doctor is still in his plaster cast, but I hear is doing well, after a + grumbly fashion. He is able to sit up a little every day and to receive a + carefully selected list of visitors. Mrs. McGurk sorts them out at the + door, and repudiates the ones she doesn't like. + </p> + <p> + Good-by. I'd write some more, but I'm so sleepy that my eyes are shutting + on me. (The idiom is Sadie Kate's.) I must go to bed and get some sleep + against the one hundred and seven troubles of tomorrow. + </p> + <p> + With love to the Pendletons, + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + January 22. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + This letter has nothing to do with the John Grier Home. It's merely from + Sallie McBride. + </p> + <p> + Do you remember when we read Huxley's letters our senior year? That book + contained a phrase which has stuck in my memory ever since: "There is + always a Cape Horn in one's life that one either weathers or wrecks + oneself on." It's terribly true; and the trouble is that you can't always + recognize your Cape Horn when you see it. The sailing is sometimes pretty + foggy, and you're wrecked before you know it. + </p> + <p> + I've been realizing of late that I have reached the Cape Horn of my own + life. I entered upon my engagement to Gordon honestly and hopefully, but + little by little I've grown doubtful of the outcome. The girl he loves is + not the ME I want to be. It's the ME I've been trying to grow away from + all this last year. I'm not sure she ever really existed. Gordon just + imagined she did. Anyway, she doesn't exist any more, and the only fair + course both to him and to myself was to end it. + </p> + <p> + We no longer have any interests in common; we are not friends. He doesn't + comprehend it; he thinks that I am making it up, that all I have to do is + to take an interest in his life, and everything will turn out happily. Of + course I do take an interest when he's with me. I talk about the things he + wants to talk about, and he doesn't know that there's a whole part of me—the + biggest part of me—that simply doesn't meet him at any point. I + pretend when I am with him. I am not myself, and if we were to live + together in constant daily intercourse, I'd have to keep on pretending all + my life. He wants me to watch his face and smile when he smiles and frown + when he frowns. He can't realize that I'm an individual just as much as he + is. + </p> + <p> + I have social accomplishments. I dress well, I'm spectacular, I would be + an ideal hostess in a politician's household—and that's why he likes + me. + </p> + <p> + Anyway, I suddenly saw with awful distinctness that if I kept on I'd be in + a few years where Helen Brooks is. She's a far better model of married + life for me to contemplate just this moment than you, dear Judy. I think + that such a spectacle as you and Jervis is a menace to society. You look + so happy and peaceful and companionable that you induce a defenseless + onlooker to rush off and snap up the first man she meets—and he's + always the wrong man. + </p> + <p> + Anyway, Gordon and I have quarreled definitely and finally. I should + rather have ended without a quarrel, but considering his temperament,—and + mine, too, I must confess,—we had to go off in a big smoky + explosion. He came yesterday afternoon, after I'd written him not to come, + and we went walking over Knowltop. For three and a half hours we paced + back and forth over that windy moor and discussed ourselves to the + bottommost recesses of our beings. No one can ever say the break came + through misunderstanding each other! + </p> + <p> + It ended by Gordon's going, never to return. As I stood there at the end + and watched him drop out of sight over the brow of the hill, and realized + that I was free and alone and my own master well, Judy, such a sense of + joyous relief, of freedom, swept over me! I can't tell you; I don't + believe any happily married person could ever realize how wonderfully, + beautifully ALONE I felt. I wanted to throw my arms out and embrace the + whole waiting world that belonged suddenly to me. Oh, it is such a relief + to have it settled! I faced the truth the night of the fire when I saw the + old John Grier go, and realized that a new John Grier would be built in + its place and that I wouldn't be here to do it. A horrible jealousy + clutched at my heart. I couldn't give it up, and during those agonizing + moments while I thought we had lost our doctor, I realized what his life + meant, and how much more significant than Gordon's. And I knew then that I + couldn't desert him. I had to go on and carry out all of the plans we made + together. + </p> + <p> + I don't seem to be telling you anything but a mess of words, I am so full + of such a mess of crowding emotions. I want to talk and talk and talk + myself into coherence. But, anyway, I stood alone in the winter twilight, + and I took a deep breath of clear cold air, and I felt beautifully, + wonderfully, electrically free. + </p> + <p> + And then I ran and leaped and skipped down the hill and across the + pastures toward our iron confines, and I sang to myself. Oh, it was a + scandalous proceeding, when, according to all precedent, I should have + gone trailing home with a broken wing. I never gave one thought to poor + Gordon, who was carrying a broken, bruised, betrayed heart to the railroad + station. + </p> + <p> + As I entered the house I was greeted by the joyous clatter of the children + trooping to their supper. They were suddenly MINE, and lately, as my doom + became more and more imminent, they had seemed fading away into little + strangers. I seized the three nearest and hugged them hard. I have + suddenly found such new life and exuberance, I feel as though I had been + released from prison and were free. I feel,—oh, I'll stop,—I + just want you to know the truth. Don't show Jervis this letter, but tell + him what's in it in a decently subdued and mournful fashion. + </p> + <p> + It's midnight now, and I'm going to try to go to sleep. It's wonderful not + to be going to marry some one you don't want to marry. I'm glad of all + these children's needs, I'm glad of Helen Brooks, and, yes, of the fire, + and everything that has made me see clearly. There's never been a divorce + in my family, and they would have hated it. + </p> + <p> + I know I'm horribly egotistical and selfish; I ought to be thinking of + poor Gordon's broken heart. But really it would just be a pose if I + pretended to be very sorrowful. He'll find some one else with just as + conspicuous hair as mine, who will make just as effective a hostess, and + who won't be bothered by any of these damned modern ideas about public + service and woman's mission and all the rest of the tomfoolery the modern + generation of women is addicted to. (I paraphrase, and soften our young + man's heartbroken utterances.) + </p> + <p> + Good-by, dear people. How I wish I could stand with you on your beach and + look across the blue, blue sea! I salute the Spanish main. + </p> + <p> + ADDIO! SALLIE. + </p> + <p> + January 27. + </p> + <p> + Dear Dr. MacRae: + </p> + <p> + I wonder if this note will be so fortunate as to find you awake? Perhaps + you are not aware that I have called four times to offer thanks and + consolation in my best bed-side manner? I am touched by the news that Mrs. + McGurk's time is entirely occupied in taking in flowers and jelly and + chicken broth, donated by the adoring ladies of the parish to the + ungracious hero in a plaster cast. I know that you find a cap of homespun + more comfortable than a halo, but I really do think that you might have + regarded me in a different light from the hysterical ladies in question. + You and I used to be friends (intermittently), and though there are one or + two details in our past intercourse that might better be expunged, still I + don't see why we should let them upset our entire relationship. Can't we + be sensible and expunge them? + </p> + <p> + The fire has brought out such a lot of unexpected kindliness and charity, + I wish it might bring out a little from you. You see, Sandy, I know you + well. You may pose to the world as being gruff and curt and ungracious and + scientific and inhuman and S C O T C H, but you can't fool me. My newly + trained psychological eye has been upon you for ten months, and I have + applied the Binet test. You are really kind and sympathetic and wise and + forgiving and big, so please be at home the next time I come to see you, + and we will perform a surgical operation upon Time and amputate five + months. + </p> + <p> + Do you remember the Sunday afternoon we ran away, and what a nice time we + had? It is now the day after that. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE McBRIDE. + </p> + <p> + P.S. If I condescend to call upon you again, please condescend to see me, + for I assure you I won't try more than once! Also, I assure you that I + won't drip tears on your counterpane or try to kiss your hand, as I hear + one admiring lady did. + </p> + <p> + THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Thursday. + </p> + <p> + Dear Enemy: + </p> + <p> + You see, I'm feeling very friendly toward you this moment. When I call you + "MacRae" I don't like you, and when I call you "Enemy" I do. + </p> + <p> + Sadie Kate delivered your note (as an afterthought). And it's a very + creditable production for a left-handed man; I thought at first glance it + was from Punch. + </p> + <p> + You may expect me tomorrow at four, and mind you're awake! I'm glad that + you think we're friends. Really, I feel that I've got back something quite + precious which I had carelessly mislaid. + </p> + <p> + S. McB. + </p> + <p> + P.S. Java caught cold the night of the fire and he has the toothache. He + sits and holds his cheek like a poor little kiddie. + </p> + <p> + Thursday, January 29. + </p> + <p> + Dear Judy: + </p> + <p> + Those must have been ten terribly incoherent pages I dashed off to you + last week. Did you respect my command to destroy that letter? I should not + care to have it appear in my collected correspondence. I know that my + state of mind is disgraceful, shocking, scandalous, but one really can't + help the way one feels. It is usually considered a pleasant sensation to + be engaged, but, oh, it is nothing compared with the wonderful + untrammeled, joyous, free sensation of being unengaged! I have had a + terribly unstable feeling these last few months, and now at last I am + settled. No one ever looked forward to spinsterhood more thankfully than + I. + </p> + <p> + Our fire, I have come to believe, was providential. It was sent from + heaven to clear the way for a new John Grier. We are already deep in plans + for cottages. I favor gray stucco, Betsy leans to brick, and Percy, + half-timber. I don't know what our poor doctor would prefer; olive green + with a mansard roof appears to be his taste. + </p> + <p> + With ten different kitchens to practice in, won't our children learn how + to cook! I am already looking about for ten loving house mothers to put in + charge. I think, in fact, I'll search for eleven, in order to have one for + Sandy. He's as pathetically in need of a little mothering as any of the + chicks. + </p> + <p> + It must be pretty dispiriting to come home every night to the + ministrations of Mrs. McGur-rk. + </p> + <p> + How I do not like that woman! She has with complacent firmness told me + four different times that the dochther was ashleep and not wantin' to be + disturbed. I haven't set eyes on him yet, and I have just about finished + being polite. However, I waive judgment until tomorrow at four, when I am + to pay a short, unexciting call of half an hour. He made the appointment + himself, and if she tells me again that he is ashleep, I shall give her a + gentle push and tip her over (she's very fat and unstable) and, planting a + foot firmly on her stomach, pursue my way tranquilly in and up. Luellen, + formerly chauffeur, chambermaid, and gardener, is now also trained nurse. + I am eager to see how he looks in a white cap and apron. + </p> + <p> + The mail has just come, with a letter from Mrs. Bretland, telling how + happy they are to have the children. She inclosed their first photograph—all + packed in a governess cart, with Clifford proudly holding the reins, and a + groom at the pony's head. How is that for three late inmates of the John + Grier Home? + </p> + <p> + It's all very inspiring when I think of their futures, but a trifle sad + when I remember their poor father, and how he worked himself to death for + those three chicks who are going to forget him. The Bretlands will do + their best to accomplish that. They are jealous of any outside influence + and want to make the babies wholly theirs. After all, I think the natural + way is best—for each family to produce its own children, and keep + them. + </p> + <p> + Friday. + </p> + <p> + I saw the doctor today. He's a pathetic sight, consisting mostly of + bandages. Somehow or other we got our misunderstandings all made up. Isn't + it dreadful the way two human beings, both endowed with fair powers of + speech, can manage to convey nothing of their psychological processes to + each other? + </p> + <p> + I haven't understood his mental attitude from the first, and he even yet + doesn't understand mine. This grim reticence that we Northern people + struggle so hard to maintain! I don't know after all but that the + excitable Southern safety valve method is the best. + </p> + <p> + But, Judy, such a dreadful thing—do you remember last year when he + visited that psychopathic institution, and stayed ten days, and I made + such a silly fuss about it? Oh, my dear, the impossible things I do! He + went to attend his wife's funeral. She died there in the institution. Mrs. + McGurk knew it all the time, and might have added it to the rest of her + news, but she didn't. + </p> + <p> + He told me all about her, very sweetly. The poor man for years and years + has undergone a terrible strain, and I fancy her death is a blessed + relief. He confesses that he knew at the time of his marriage that he + ought not to marry her, he knew all about her nervous instability; but he + thought, being a doctor, that he could overcome it, and she was beautiful! + He gave up his city practice and came to the country on her account. And + then after the little girl's birth she went all to pieces, and he had to + "put her away," to use Mrs. McGurk's phrase. The child is six now, a + sweet, lovely little thing to look at, but, I judge from what he said, + quite abnormal. He has a trained nurse with her always. Just think of all + that tragedy looming over our poor patient good doctor, for he is patient, + despite being the most impatient man that ever lived! + </p> + <p> + Thank Jervis for his letter. He's a dear man, and I'm glad to see him + getting his deserts. What fun we are going to have when you get back to + Shadywell, and we lay our plans for a new John Grier! I feel as though I + had spent this past year learning, and am now just ready to begin. We'll + turn this into the nicest orphan asylum that ever lived. I'm so absurdly + happy at the prospect that I start in the morning with a spring, and go + about my various businesses singing inside. + </p> + <p> + The John Grier Home sends its blessing to the two best friends it ever + had! + </p> + <p> + ADDIO! SALLIE. THE JOHN GRIER HOME, + </p> + <p> + Saturday at half-past six in the morning! + </p> + <p> + My dearest Enemy: + </p> + <p> + "Some day soon something nice is going to happen." + </p> + <p> + Weren't you surprised when you woke up this morning and remembered the + truth? I was! I couldn't think for about two minutes what made me so + happy. + </p> + <p> + It's not light yet, but I'm wide awake and excited and having to write to + you. I shall despatch this note by the first to-be-trusted little orphan + who appears, and it will go up on your breakfast tray along with your + oatmeal. + </p> + <p> + I shall follow VERY PROMPTLY at four o'clock this afternoon. Do you think + Mrs. McGurk will ever countenance the scandal if I stay two hours, and no + orphan for a chaperon? + </p> + <p> + It was in all good faith, Sandy, that I promised not to kiss your hand or + drip tears on the counterpane, but I'm afraid I did both—or worse! + Positively, I didn't suspect how much I cared for you till I crossed the + threshold and saw you propped up against the pillows, all covered with + bandages, and your hair singed off. You are a sight! If I love you now, + when fully one third of you is plaster of Paris and surgical dressing, you + can imagine how I'm going to love you when it's all you! + </p> + <p> + But my dear, dear Robin, what a foolish man you are! How should I ever + have dreamed all those months that you were caring for me when you acted + so abominably S C O T C H? With most men, behavior like yours would not be + considered a mark of affection. I wish you had just given me a glimmering + of an idea of the truth, and maybe you would have saved us both a few + heartaches. + </p> + <p> + But we mustn't be looking back; we must look forward and be grateful. The + two happiest things in life are going to be ours, a FRIENDLY marriage and + work that we love. + </p> + <p> + Yesterday, after leaving you, I walked back to the asylum sort of dazed. I + wanted to get by myself and THINK, but instead of being by myself, I had + to have Betsy and Percy and Mrs. Livermore for dinner (already invited) + and then go down and talk to the children. Friday night-social evening. + They had a lot of new records for the victrola, given by Mrs. Livermore, + and I had to sit politely and listen to them. And, my dear—you'll + think this funny—the last thing they played was "John Anderson, my + jo John," and suddenly I found myself crying! I had to snatch up the + nearest orphan and hug her hard, with my head buried in her shoulder, to + keep them all from seeing. + </p> +<p class="poem"> + John Anderson, my jo John,<br/> + We clamb the hill thegither,<br/> + And monie a canty day, John,<br/> + We've had wi' ane anither;<br/> + Now we maun totter down, John,<br/> + But hand in hand we'll go,<br/> + And sleep thegither at the foot,<br/> + John Anderson, my jo. +</p> + <p> + I wonder, when we are old and bent and tottery, can you and I look back, + with no regrets, on monie a canty day we've had wi' ane anither? It's nice + to look forward to, isn't it—a life of work and play and little + daily adventures side by side with somebody you love? I'm not afraid of + the future any more. I don't mind growing old with you, Sandy. "Time is + but the stream I go a-fishing in." + </p> + <p> + The reason I've grown to love these orphans is because they need me so, + and that's the reason—at least one of the reasons—I've grown + to love you. You're a pathetic figure of a man, my dear, and since you + won't make yourself comfortable, you must be MADE comfortable. + </p> + <p> + We'll build a house on the hillside just beyond the asylum—how does + a yellow Italian villa strike you, or preferably a pink one? Anyway, it + won't be green. And it won't have a mansard roof. And we'll have a big + cheerful living room, all fireplace and windows and view, and no McGURK. + Poor old thing! won't she be in a temper and cook you a dreadful dinner + when she hears the news! But we won't tell her for a long, long time—or + anybody else. It's too scandalous a proceeding right on top of my own + broken engagement. I wrote to Judy last night, and with unprecedented + self-control I never let fall so much as a hint. I'm growing Scotch + mysel'! + </p> + <p> + Perhaps I didn't tell you the exact truth, Sandy, when I said I hadn't + known how much I cared. I think it came to me the night the John Grier + burned. When you were up under that blazing roof, and for the half hour + that followed, when we didn't know whether or not you would live, I can't + tell you what agonies I went through. It seemed to me, if you did go, that + I would never get over it all my life; that somehow to have let the best + friend I ever had pass away with a dreadful chasm of misunderstanding + between us—well—I couldn't wait for the moment when I should + be allowed to see you and talk out all that I have been shutting inside me + for five months. And then—you know that you gave strict orders to + keep me out; and it hurt me dreadfully. How should I suspect that you + really wanted to see me more than any of the others, and that it was just + that terrible Scotch moral sense that was holding you back? You are a very + good actor, Sandy. But, my dear, if ever in our lives again we have the + tiniest little cloud of a misunderstanding, let's promise not to shut it + up inside ourselves, but to TALK. + </p> + <p> + Last night, after they all got off,—early, I am pleased to say, + since the chicks no longer live at home,—I came upstairs and + finished my letter to Judy, and then I looked at the telephone and + struggled with temptation. I wanted to call up 505 and say good night to + you. But I didn't dare. I'm still quite respectably bashful! So, as the + next best thing to talking with you, I got out Burns and read him for an + hour. I dropped asleep with all those Scotch love songs running in my + head, and here I am at daybreak writing them to you. + </p> + <p> + Good-by, Robin lad, I lo'e you weel. + </p> + <p> + SALLIE. + </p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DEAR ENEMY ***</div> +<div style='text-align:left'> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will +be renamed. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. 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