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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Side Show Studies, by Francis Metcalfe
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Side Show Studies
+
+Author: Francis Metcalfe
+
+Illustrator: Oliver Herford
+
+Release Date: November 19, 2007 [EBook #23542]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SIDE SHOW STUDIES ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Stephen Blundell and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive/American Libraries.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+               SIDE SHOW
+                STUDIES
+
+
+                   BY
+            FRANCIS METCALFE
+
+
+ _ILLUSTRATED WITH MANY AMUSING DRAWINGS
+            BY OLIVER HERFORD_
+
+
+                NEW YORK
+      THE OUTING PUBLISHING COMPANY
+                  1906
+
+
+
+
+ Copyright, 1905 and 1906, by
+ THE OUTING PUBLISHING COMPANY
+
+ First impression, March, 1906
+
+
+ THE OUTING PRESS
+ DEPOSIT, N. Y.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+
+                                                              PAGE
+
+ THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ AND THE REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY           1
+
+ THE BITE OF A RATTLER AND THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE             23
+
+ THE AMOROUS BABOON                                             45
+
+ FEEDING THE SERPENTS AND A GRAND TRANSFORMATION                67
+
+ THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE AND THE INCONSIDERATE PYTHON           89
+
+ THE ANIMAL BAROMETER AND THE ETERNAL FEMININE                 113
+
+ MAKING A STAR LION AND AN INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE MEETING      137
+
+ KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT                                       163
+
+ THE HYPNOTIC BEAR AND THE SENTIMENTAL LECTURER                183
+
+ THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS AND THE POWER OF HYPNOTISM          211
+
+
+
+
+THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ AND THE REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY
+
+
+
+
+THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ AND THE REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY
+
+
+Madame Morelli, the pretty little Frenchwoman who makes a half-score of
+leopards, panthers and jaguars do things which nature never intended
+them to do, had finished her act and driven the snarling performers
+through the narrow runway to their separate cages, fastening each one,
+as she thought, securely. Two French clowns were filling in the time and
+making the audience of Coney Island pleasure seekers laugh by their
+antics with a performing dog, while the stage hands were bringing in the
+properties for the next trained animal act, when the Proprietor came
+from behind the scenes and strolled, apparently unconcerned, to the back
+of the Arena, where he could command a clear view of the performance,
+the audience and the cages. He said a few words to each of the trainers
+and keepers whom he passed, and the Stranger, who knew the clock-like
+regularity with which each one of them went through his allotted duties,
+noticed an unwonted haste and suppressed excitement among them.
+
+As he joined the Proprietor the sound of hammering mingled with the
+noise of the blatant brass band and the cries of the ballyhoo spielers
+for the other Dreamland attractions, which came in through the open
+windows, and he saw that Stevenson, the mild eyed quiet man who is
+always on hand to rescue imperiled trainers and keepers when their own
+carelessness, or unexpected revolt on the part of the animals, leads to
+a fight, was rapidly nailing boards over the ventilating spaces above
+the cages. Madam Morelli, whip and training rod in hand, hurried from
+her dressing room to the runway, and every keeper and trainer seemed to
+be loitering in the space between the leopards' den and the audience.
+
+He looked at the Proprietor inquiringly, but the little trickle of
+blood which ran down his cheek from under his cap answered the question
+he would have asked, an animal was loose and the Proprietor had
+encountered it in his rounds. A crash of weird music from the band
+drowned the sound of a cracking whip and sharp commands which came from
+the runway, and announced the appearance of Brandu, the snake charmer,
+in the exhibition cage, and the audience watched him play with a cobra,
+all unconscious that Franz, the jaguar, which a few minutes before had
+desisted from his attempt to tear the fair shoulders of Morelli only
+after a dozen blank cartridges had been fired in his face, was a
+gentleman-at-large in Dreamland. The Proprietor gave a sigh of relief as
+the jaguar backed into his cage from the runway, snarling and striking
+at the little woman who forced him backward with the whip until she was
+able to slam the door and make him once more a prisoner. When she passed
+them on her way back to the dressing-room, her dress was torn, and her
+eyes were flashing from the excitement of the encounter and anger at the
+carelessness of the carpenter who had left a board loose at the top of
+the den.
+
+[Illustration: _The table in front of the Arena._]
+
+"Of course, that might have been a serious thing for the jaguar and for
+my pocket book," said the Proprietor as three deep scratches in his head
+were being plastered up. "I couldn't afford to take any chances of an
+accident, and he would have been shot if he had attempted to come
+through a ventilator into the Arena, but a trained animal like that is
+worth a goodish bit of money. He let me know he was loose by giving me
+his love pat when I was walking through the runway, and as Morelli is
+the only one who can do anything with him I sent for her. She can whip
+considerably more than her own weight in wild-cats, and there was not
+the slightest danger to the audience, but not many men would have
+relished her task of going into that passage with the beast loose on top
+of the cages." He negatived the Press Agent's suggestion to make a
+scare-head story of the escape for the papers, and suggested that they
+should go up and hear Madam Morelli's account of it. She was sitting on
+the edge of her bed, mending a rip which the jaguar's sharp claws had
+made in her gown, and she shrugged her shoulders when the Stranger
+inquired if she had been hurt.
+
+[Illustration: _Two French clowns and a performing dog._]
+
+"It was nothing," she said laughing. "He jumped at me from the top of a
+cage when I came in, but I beat him off and whipped him back into his
+cage. It was only the close quarters which made it bad, for I am used to
+fighting them." She was interrupted by a yapping and caterwauling in the
+doorway, and sprang on the bed, her face white with terror, as a small
+terrier and the menagerie cat rolled into the room in a clawing, biting
+mix-up. The terrier was raising a litter of puppies in the next room,
+and the cat had transformed the space back of Morelli's bed into a
+feline nursery, and a meeting of the two anxious mothers in the hall had
+led to trouble. Madam Morelli always goes through her performance in an
+evening dress, and she stood on the bed, her long train gathered closely
+about her, trembling like a leaf, when the Proprietor finally separated
+the combatants and restored peace.
+
+"You wouldn't think that a woman who had just come from a fight with a
+two hundred pound jaguar, which could easily tear her to pieces, would
+be scared at a scrap between a toy terrier and a mongrel cat," said the
+Proprietor, laughing, as he led the way to the café table. "But she
+makes a specialty of the larger species."
+
+"This matter of specialties seems to run through every branch of the
+show business," said the Press Agent as they took their seats at the
+table. "I ran a dime museum in St. Louis a few years ago--in those days
+there was lots of money in it--and the freaks would never stand for any
+change in their billing. We used to have a fresh lot sent on by our New
+York agent every two weeks, and one Monday morning when I went down to
+look over the new arrivals, I knew that he had been up against the demon
+Rum, when he engaged such a tough looking bunch. The alleged fat woman
+looked as if she was wasting away with consumption, and the bearded lady
+had a way of absentmindedly humming the popular airs in a bass voice
+which gave the whole snap away. There was one likely looking girl and
+when I asked her what she was she told me she was the web-footed lady
+and showed me her feet, which had little pieces of skin growing between
+the toes.
+
+"I knew that wasn't good enough, so I told her she was mistaken; that
+she was a Circassian beauty, and I gave her a wig and the fixings and
+put her on the platform. But say, would you believe it? She was so mad
+and embarrassed by the change in her stunt that when the lecturer was
+calling attention to her blond beauty, she would blush until she looked
+like an Indian Princess, and every time he turned his back she would
+take off her shoes and wiggle her toes at the audience to show what she
+really was.
+
+[Illustration: _"Things which Nature never intended them to do."_]
+
+"It was up to us to get some real attraction to tide over the time until
+our agent should get sober and send us another bunch of freaks, so
+Merritt, who was my partner, and myself hunted up a big buck nigger and
+made a deal with him to go on as a 'Wild Man.' We ripped up a hair
+mattress and glued the contents onto him, and wired a couple of big
+tusks to his teeth, and with an iron collar around his neck and a log
+chain around his waist he was as good an imitation as was ever faked. We
+put him in a big cage which we had used the week before for a mangy old
+lion; one of the five hundred or so 'Wallace the Untamables' which were
+touring the country, and Merritt taught him to howl like a steam
+calliope.
+
+"We called him 'Fuzzy Wuzzy, the Terrible Man-Eating Cannibal,' which
+was a waste of words, but Merritt had language to burn. He had got hold
+of a phony five hundred dollar bill, and when he was giving his spiel
+about how Fuzzy Wuzzy was captured upon a desert island, where he was
+found chewing a human leg, and how he couldn't eat anything but raw
+meat, and was always trying to get at his keeper for dessert, he would
+wave his phony five hundred spot over his head and give it to 'em good.
+
+"'Five hundred dollars, ladies and gents, I will give to any man who
+will remain for the short space of two minutes in the cage with Fuzzy
+Wuzzy! Five hundred dollars to any man who is brave enough to run the
+risk of letting this terrible man-eating cannibal get his hinder limbs
+about him, for then all would be lost and Fuzzy Wuzzy would fasten his
+terrible fangs in his victim's throat and suck his ber-lud.'
+
+"Well, it was a good spiel, all right, all right, and when Merritt
+struck that part one of the supers would prod up old Fuzzy, who would
+rattle his chains and howl for fair, and the audience would get cold
+chills down their backs. We were playing to the S. R. O., and giving so
+many shows a day that Merritt pretty nearly lost his voice, and Fuzzy
+had been prodded so much that he had to take his meals standing up. We
+ran 'em through pretty fast, and one afternoon Merritt was just going to
+give the 'All out' signal, which cleared the exhibition hall for the
+next performance, when up steps a big husky black roustabout from the
+levee and commences to strip off his coat.
+
+"'Jes' a minit, boss,' says he. 'Ah reckon ah needs dat five hundred in
+mah bizness,' and Merritt looks at him in astonishment.
+
+"'My deluded colored brother,' says he, 'Do you appreciate the fact that
+you are going to a certain and horrible death? If this terrible Fuzzy
+Wuzzy gets his hinder limbs about you he will suck your ber-lud.'
+
+"'Ah doan reckon he'll git me, an' ah suttenly needs de money,' answers
+the coon, and continues to strip, and Merritt sizes him up and sees the
+finish of Fuzzy Wuzzy, who was shaking the bars and trying to get away
+from the super who was prodding him; but everybody thought he was trying
+to get at the coon to make a meal of him, and some of the women folks
+were getting hysterics. One of the boys had put me wise, and I broke
+through the crowd and called a halt in the proceedings.
+
+"'Ladies and gentlemen,' says I, 'I didn't believe that a man existed
+who was foolhardy enough to be tempted to certain death by the lure of
+a paltry five hundred dollars. But although this man is so reckless of
+his own life, I must insist that he get a permit from the mayor,
+relieving us from all responsibility, before we allow him to be torn
+limb from limb. Return to-morrow at two o'clock, and if this man's
+courage still keeps up, you will see before your shuddering eyes an
+encounter which will make the historical gladiatorial combats of ancient
+Rome pale into insignificance.' I could sling a few language myself,
+those days, and the mayor was a friend of mine--or I thought he was--so
+I figured we could catch the suckers for an admission and then call it
+off, because he would refuse a permit.
+
+[Illustration: _"Blank cartridges fired in his face."_]
+
+"But he was onto the game and he was one of those blame fools who
+thought he had a sense of humor, so he gives him a document with a big
+red seal on it which looks like a doctor's diploma, which says that
+Thomas Jefferson is allowed to go in and win our five hundred, and the
+next day the coon shows up smiling and ready, and I knew we had to make
+good somehow. I passed the word to Merritt to delay the game and make a
+last grand effort to throw a scare into the coon, and he put up a spiel
+to beat the band.
+
+"'This terrible Fuzzy Wuzzy has none of the attributes of a human
+being,' says he. 'He lives upon raw meat and would prefer human flesh if
+he could get it. Observe the expression of ghoulish glee in his eyes as
+he regards the foolhardy man who will soon furnish him such a meal as he
+formerly enjoyed in his native jungle. He sleeps at night suspended from
+the top bars of his cage by his claw-like hands and feet, which will
+soon be tearing the flesh of this man who stands before you now, a
+picture of perfect health and strength. He speaks no intelligible
+language, but he utters howls and yells, which will be more horrible
+than ever before when he is sucking the warm heart's be-lud of the
+figure which you see before you for the last time in human shape.' Just
+then the super gives Fuzzy a prod and he howls like Balaam's ass, but
+the coon stands there smiling and not feazed a bit.
+
+"'It's a sad sight,' continues Merritt, 'to see a fine man in the prime
+of life, like our colored brother here, crushed into an unrecognizable
+mass by the terrible hinder limbs of this man-eating cannibal and then
+torn to shreds by his horrible fangs. The management of this highly
+moral and intellectual show will provide a funeral for the remains, if
+there are any, and now, ladies and gents, I call upon you to witness
+that we are not responsible for the terrible end which awaits this
+reckless man.'
+
+"I had taken the precaution to button up the box office 'take' in my
+inside pocket, and while Merritt was making a bluff at looking for the
+key to the cage door I looked around to see that there was a free exit,
+for the coon was standing there swelling out his chest and grinning as
+if he had the five hundred already in his jeans, and I knew he couldn't
+be bluffed out. Just then a typical antebellum Missourian, one of the
+kind that has to be shown, steps up in front. He was tanked up until his
+safety valve would have blown off if it hadn't been wired down, but he
+was pretty steady on his pins when he held onto the railing in front of
+the cage.
+
+[Illustration: _"Five hundred dollars to any one who will enter the
+cage."_]
+
+"'Professah,' says he, 'did I undahstand yo' all correctly to say that
+this yeah object in the cage has none of the attributes of the human
+race?'
+
+"'Correct!' says Merritt, glad of an excuse to delay things. 'He is
+lower than the beasts of the field.'
+
+"'Well, he suttenly aint much to look at,' says the Southerner, looking
+him over carefully. 'He won't eat like folks--he can't talk--an' he
+sleeps like a bat. I dunno why such a pusillanimous critter should
+cumber the yearth,' and with that he puts his hand to his hip and pulls
+out a forty-five from under the tails of his coat. Fuzzy takes one look
+at it, and it didn't need any prodding to make him holler, and he tries
+to tear off the false tusks.
+
+"'Foh Gawd's sake, mistah, doan shoot!' he yells. 'Dat white mahn's been
+tellin' a passel ob lies about me until ah's sartain suah somefing gwine
+fer to git me. Ah can eat an' talk like any one, an' mos' ebery one
+knows me about yeah wen ah ain't got dese yeah contraptions on.'
+
+"'Shut up, you blame fool!' says Merritt. 'He won't shoot you.'
+
+"'Mebbe he knows dat, mebbe you knows dat; but how does I know dat?'
+yells Fuzzy. 'Dat gun suttenly looks big to me.'
+
+"About this time the other coon got wise and saw the five hundred
+vanishing, and the last I saw of Merritt he was trying to break a
+half-Nelson that the coon had got on him and dodge the rest of the crowd
+at the same time. I left St. Louis on a freight that night, wearing a
+few lumps where some stray brickbats landed, and the next time I saw
+Merritt was in Chicago, and he was on crutches and had his head covered
+with plaster."
+
+No thunderbolt dropped from the blue dome over the Dreamland tower, and
+the Proprietor, with a childlike and bland smile on his face, motioned
+to the waiter to refill the glasses.
+
+
+
+
+THE BITE OF A RATTLER AND THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE
+
+
+
+
+THE BITE OF A RATTLER AND THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE
+
+
+Like the pitcher which went to the well until it met the proverbial
+fate, the trainer entered the lion's den once too often, and what
+remained of him was placed in an ambulance and taken to the hospital.
+After the performance for the evening was over, Baltimore, the bad lion,
+who had suddenly developed a craving for human flesh, had been dealt
+with by the Proprietor of the menagerie in a manner which would spoil
+his appetite for many a day to come and make him remember that trainers
+cannot be mangled with impunity.
+
+Most of the lights were extinguished at Dreamland, but two men sat at
+the table in front of the Arena with the Proprietor, discussing the
+accident and listening to stories of former encounters which he
+related. His own body bears the scars of many a battle with his savage
+charges, but he has discontinued giving personal exhibitions with them
+in the large cage, because his wife has developed a prejudice against
+having him brought to her in fragments, and he has found that the
+training of trainers is a far more difficult task than the education of
+wild animals.
+
+"Yes, any man who follows this business carries his life in his hands,"
+he said in answer to a question from the Stranger within the gates. "You
+helped to care for poor Bonavita to-night, after Baltimore finished with
+him, so you know what a lion's jaws can do. I've seen 'em chewed up as
+bad as that and get over it, but they never get quite the same again.
+Leave the business? No; it is like the sea: a man who takes to it keeps
+it up until the time comes when he doesn't recover, but after a bad
+accident he usually takes another breed of animals.
+
+"The worst sight I ever saw was about five years ago, when one of our
+performing bears turned on its trainer and seized his arm. He worried
+it as a terrier would a bone for a good twenty minutes before we could
+drive him off, and the bear died from the punishment we gave him. The
+man's arm isn't much use to him now, but he is crazy for me to give him
+another group of animals to train, which I can't do because a man needs
+two good pairs of limbs when he gets into the exhibition cage." He told
+of many accidents which had happened to himself and his employees, most
+of them through their own carelessness, born of constant association
+with their charges who never miss the opportunity which the shortest
+instant of forgetfulness gives them.
+
+[Illustration: _"A constant procession of small animals moving down his
+throat."_]
+
+"I said that bear attack was the worst sight I ever saw, and it was; but
+something happened here last year which impressed me more because it was
+so mysterious. A friend of mine in Florida shipped me a box of rattlers,
+which he wrote had been 'attended to,' and I supposed that their poison
+fangs had been extracted. They were delivered just before the
+performance started and I ripped a board off the box and stuck my hand
+in, grabbing them one by one and throwing them into the den as if they
+were garter snakes.
+
+"The man who took care of the snakes was out on the ballyhoo, walking
+around with the gander following him to advertise the show; and when he
+came in he looked them over and found that each one had as pretty a pair
+of fangs as you would wish to see. He told me about it and I confess
+that it gave me a gone feeling in the pit of my stomach, for I
+remembered how I had felt around for them in the box with my bare
+hands.
+
+"I am pretty busy while a performance is going on, so I told him to let
+them alone until I had a chance to examine them. Ninety per cent. of the
+accidents which occur in a menagerie comes from the disregard of
+ordinary precautions or the disobedience of orders, and I had a
+presentiment that something was going to happen and I was keeping an
+extra vigilant eye on the performers in the big exhibition cage. Well,
+it happened, all right; but not in the way that I expected.
+
+"The snake man instead of getting back on the ballyhoo where he
+belonged, stood around the snake cage, watching the new rattlers, and
+along came a couple of gazabos who commenced talking about them. One of
+them was the wise guy, who always knows about how the animals are doped
+so they won't bite and all that other information which isn't so. He
+commenced explaining how the snakes were harmless, because their teeth
+had been pulled, and giving a lot of misinformation about them. The
+snake man listened until he couldn't stand it any longer and then he
+stuck his hand into the cage and grabbed one of the rattlers by the
+neck.
+
+"'Fangs pulled, eh?' says he, and he made the rattler open his mouth and
+show a perfect pair of stingers. The wise guy took one look at them and
+fled, and the snake man would have carried it off all right, only he was
+so busy calling a few choice names after him that he placed the snake
+back in the cage instead of throwing it in, and the rattler struck him
+before he could draw his hand out. He had a clown make-up on, so I
+couldn't tell whether he was pale or not when he came to me a few
+minutes later and held out his hand, but there was a queer expression on
+his face and I knew that my apprehensions had not been groundless.
+
+"There were just two little red dots, no bigger than pin heads, on the
+back of his hand.
+
+"'You got it, didn't you?' says I.
+
+"'Good and plenty,' says he. 'My arm hurts me already.'
+
+"We got busy right away and took him up to the hospital where Bonavita
+is now. Say, he was a very thin man and you can see that I'm no
+lightweight; but by midnight the right side of his body and his right
+arm and leg were swollen to my size, and in the morning all of the
+swollen part was as black as a coal. He was suffering terribly, and I
+tried to get hold of the Arab snake doctor but couldn't locate him, so I
+wired to Rochester for Rattlesnake Pete. He came down and a mighty
+interesting man he is, but he couldn't do anything which 'Doc' up at the
+hospital hadn't done, and it was five days before my man was out of
+danger. He was not a drinking man--I finished having drunkards around my
+show a good many years ago--and the whiskey took right hold of him and
+pulled him through. 'Doc' kept squirting some red stuff into his arm,
+but it was the 'red-eye' which saved him--and that reminds me."
+
+[Illustration: _"The wise guy."_]
+
+He beckoned to the waiter and each one ordered his favorite antidote for
+a possible snake bite.
+
+"Did he return to the show?" asked the Stranger, after he had rendered
+himself immune.
+
+[Illustration: _Noah listens to the tale of a Johnstown flood
+survivor._]
+
+"He sure did; you couldn't keep him away, but he has never been fond of
+snakes since. It is the same man whom you saw putting the group of
+elephants through their paces to-night."
+
+It was growing late, and the Proprietor announced that he was going to
+show his wife a good husband and said good-night, but the Stranger
+waited for the story which he saw was trembling upon his companion's
+lips, and induced the sleepy waiter to bring a farewell dose of
+snake-bite antidote. The man was unknown to him by name, but his
+personality promised to be interesting, for his face spoke of good
+living, the red of his complexion was evidently not entirely due to
+exposure to the sun, and the little sacs under the eyes indicated that
+he was apt to be the last of a convivial party to suggest breaking up.
+
+He had listened to the Proprietor's stories with the same bored
+expression which Noah might wear in hearing the experiences of a
+survivor of the Johnstown flood, and he looked regretfully at the vacant
+chair, now that his turn had come.
+
+"Snakes!" he exclaimed with a contemptuous snort. "What does the boss
+know about 'em? I used to own the only snake that was worth having. Ever
+hear of 'Big Pete'?" The Stranger confessed his ignorance, and the
+other settled back in his chair and lighted a fresh cigar.
+
+"I'll tell you about him, then. You know that a snake is a queer
+proposition in a menagerie. They get sore mouths--canker the fakirs
+call it--and won't eat, and then, if you've got any investment in 'em
+you want to get it out mighty quick, for they are no orchids. I was
+pretty well on my uppers, after a bad season on the road, when a guy
+named Merritt came to me and said he could get a fine snake cheap, and
+he thought we might make some money out of him by showing him to the
+Rubes at the county fairs.
+
+"What I didn't know about snakes would have filled a book, but when I
+saw this one I knew it was a bargain. It was the blamedest biggest snake
+that ever gave a wriggle, and the only reason its owners had not made a
+fortune was because it was never properly advertised. I used to know
+just how much he weighed and how long he was, but my brain got so tired
+figuring up the money we made out of him that I've had no memory for
+figures since.
+
+"Well, as I said, I was pretty hard up, but I had this sparkler left for
+'fall money,' and when I saw that snake I pushed it over my uncle's
+counter." He pointed to a large yellow diamond in his scarf, and the
+Stranger tried to make a mental calculation of a pawnbroker's valuation
+of it.
+
+"Merritt managed to dig up some mazuma, and we chipped in fifty apiece
+and became the proud possessors of Big Pete. If I had been wise to the
+business I would have known there was something wrong to make him sell
+so cheap, but we more than got our money back out of him the first week,
+so we had no kick coming. The newspaper boys were good to us and gave us
+a lot of space, and we were playing on velvet and had Pete besides. It
+was such a cinch that Merritt, who looked after the snake while I did
+the spieling and sold tickets on the front, commenced to get worried for
+fear we should lose him.
+
+"'Jim,' says he to me one morning when business was a little dull, 'I
+believe there's something phony about the blame snake. He won't eat and
+I've tempted him with the best I could get. I guess I'll run down to the
+Bowery and get one of those snake sharps to come up and have a look at
+him; I believe his teeth need filling.'
+
+[Illustration: _"Just two little red dots on the back of his hand."_]
+
+"I knew he was stuck on a girl that was doing a turn in a music hall
+down that way, but business was dull, so I let him go without raising a
+holler. The next day he comes back with a jaw-carpenter who claimed he
+knew all about snakes and when he gets through looking at Pete's mouth
+we felt pretty blue.
+
+"'Canker!' says he. 'Your little snakelet may live a month.'
+
+"Well, that put it up to us to get busy, so I did the spieling on the
+outside until my voice gave out, and Merritt lied on the inside until he
+was black in the face, telling the Rubes about how many sheep old Pete
+swallowed every week. We had a lot of rabbits and doves with him in the
+cage, hopping and flying around behind the thick glass front, and they
+were real sociable with old Pete, who never batted an eye at 'em. At the
+end of the month he was looking pretty thin and we were afraid he would
+peg out any day. It was hard luck on us, for things were coming our way
+and our bank rolls were getting good and plenty thick and they were all
+'yellow boys,' from the case card to the wrapper. Our wads grew fatter
+as Pete grew thinner, and we were looking for some easy mark to unload
+him onto, when one morning Merritt comes running out, just as I was
+staving off a farmer who had heard him lie and brought around a flock of
+scabby sheep to sell to us for snake food.
+
+"'Jim,' he yells, grabbing me by the shoulders and waltzing around like
+a whirling dervish, 'we'll make Vanderbilt and Rockefeller look like
+thirty cents; old Pete has swallowed every blame pigeon and rabbit in
+the coop.'
+
+"It seemed too good to be true, but when I went to have a look there was
+not a feather nor a piece of fur to be seen and old Pete was examining
+all the corners of the cage to see that he hadn't overlooked a bit. He
+looked a whole lot better already, and Merritt and I began to discuss
+what we should do with all our money.
+
+"But say, there was one thing we forgot to reckon on--the appetite he
+had been saving for about a year, and although the money came in faster
+than ever, most of it went out to the rabbit men and pigeon fanciers.
+
+"You know that when a snake swallows an animal you can see the bulge in
+him for a long time, but you couldn't see any in old Pete. He was just
+the same size all the way from his nose to the tip of his tail, for
+there was no space between the animals.
+
+"Things began to look pretty serious for us, for we had used up all the
+available small live stock in the surrounding country, and the Rubes got
+onto the fact that we were up against their game and raised the ante on
+us for what was left. It's like taking candy from a child to sell a gold
+brick to a farmer, but he everlastingly gets back at you if you have to
+buy any of his produce. Hungry Joe and the man who invented the
+green-goods game would be skinned to death if they had to buy a dozen
+eggs from one of 'em.
+
+"And all the time old Pete kept a constant procession of small animals
+moving down his throat, regardless of expense, and if the supply ran
+short he would look at Merritt so reproachfully that it made him feel so
+bad he couldn't deliver his lecture for sobs. He worked the pathetic on
+him, but if I came around there was no 'Only three grains of corn,
+mother,' expression on his face; he would just rear up on his tail and
+lambaste that glass trying to get at me. I had been living pretty well
+during our prosperity and I guess I looked good to him, so rather than
+have any hard feelings about it I stuck closer than ever to the front of
+the house.
+
+"We had rented a frame building in a little town up on the Hudson and
+were showing him off in good form. Business was rushing and we had the
+S. R. O. sign out all the time, but snake food was getting scarcer than
+boiled lobsters during the cold snap last winter. The show had closed up
+for night and we were trying to make dents in the front of the tavern
+bar with our breast bones and laying in a stock of supplies, in case old
+Pete should bite us.
+
+"While we were discussing the best way to stimulate the rabbit-breeding
+industry, 'biff--boom--bang,' went the town bell and the barkeep
+commenced to peel off his coat and get into a red flannel shirt and a
+fireman's helmet. It was one of those towns where they have a dude
+volunteer fire department, which the boys all join for the socials in
+the winter and to look pretty on the annual parade day. Merritt and I
+didn't hurry any; we knew that it would take some time for the chief,
+who kept the town drug store, to get into his red shirt and shiny boots
+and select the bouquet to carry in the big end of his speaking trumpet.
+Pretty soon, 'Always Ready, Ever Faithful, Hose Company Number One,'
+which comprised the department, came down the street, all of the company
+shouting orders through trumpets at the two coons who were pulling the
+cart.
+
+"Of course, we went along to see the 'Fighting the Flames' show, but
+say: the joke was on us, for it was our theater which provided it. There
+wasn't anything left to burn and the hose company marched proudly back.
+Poor old Pete was nothing but a heap of ashes and Merritt looked
+sorrowful.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'let's copper the rabbit market before they get wise.'"
+
+"Did you have no insurance?" asked the Stranger sympathetically.
+
+"Not a blame cent," replied his companion as he rose to go to bed. "But
+I am making good money out of old Pete yet. I had him stuffed and get a
+hundred a week from a dime museum for him--and they furnish the feed."
+
+
+
+
+THE AMOROUS BABOON
+
+
+
+
+THE AMOROUS BABOON
+
+
+Thanks to the busy Press Agent, the fame of Jocko the Jealous, the
+amorous baboon, had preceded him to America, and when the animals from
+the Paris Hippodrome had been safely transferred to their dens in the
+Arena at Dreamland he was the center of attraction as he limbered up his
+muscles in the large monkey cage, after the cramped accommodations of
+the small traveling box. He had gained a reputation as a masher in
+Paris; but never had the menagerie attendants seen him so madly in love
+and so insanely jealous as upon his first introduction to American
+beauty, as exemplified by the fair woman who stood before his cage.
+
+Jocko was not the first male being who had been fascinated by the charms
+of the Prima Donna during her career; for she had been through the
+marriage ceremony so often that she could say it backwards, never
+forgetting to cross her fingers before saying, "Until death do us part."
+The Proprietor drew the Stranger's attention to the group before the
+cage, a mischievous smile on his face as he looked over the half dozen
+of callow youths who are always in the train of the Prima Donna.
+
+"Watch out for squalls over there," he said. "Jocko is affectionate now,
+but there will be something doing in a few minutes." The monkey was
+using all of the blandishments known to an amorous baboon and although
+the words of his soft chattering were unintelligible, their import could
+not be mistaken by a past mistress of the gentle art of love making; but
+the Prima Donna could not be beguiled into placing herself within reach
+of the hairy paws. Suddenly his mood changed, for one of her male
+companions placed his hand on her arm to attract her attention and
+Jocko, giving a howl of rage, danced madly up and down on all fours,
+showing a vicious set of fangs as his lips curled back in a hideous
+snarl. The bars of his cage were strong and so close together that he
+could not get out to attack his rival; but he gathered up a mass of
+litter from the floor and showered Prima Donna and callow youth alike.
+His screams echoed through the Arena and caused even the majestic lions
+and the haughty tigers to look in the direction of the cage of the
+despised "Bandar Log," and made the smaller animals uneasy. The woman
+who was described on the programme as "Miss ----, Famous Society Woman,"
+had torn herself away from her arduous social duties with the Four
+Hundred to exhibit a troupe of leopards to a Coney Island audience, her
+identity concealed by a small black mask, and her performance in the big
+cage was interrupted by the noise; so the Proprietor thought it time to
+interfere.
+
+[Illustration: _"He smoked his cigar in the lobby like any other
+guest."_]
+
+The Prima Donna laughed good-naturedly as he helped to brush the sawdust
+and litter from her dress and tactfully drew her away, and Jocko quieted
+down and implored her to return; but she was accustomed to gentler
+wooing, and refused to put her dainty gown again in jeopardy.
+
+"Jocko gave quite a performance to-night," said the Proprietor as he
+joined the Press Agent and the Stranger at the table, after the show.
+"That baboon is crazy about women; but he hasn't the discrimination of
+Consul, the most intelligent monkey that ever lived. You may remember
+that he was never quiet in his cage, but if a specially well-dressed
+woman stopped in front of it he played entirely to her and when she
+moved away his eyes followed her as long as she was in sight."
+
+"There will never be another like Consul," said the Press Agent, shaking
+his head sadly. "He made my job a sinecure, for he was good for a column
+any day and a full page on Sundays."
+
+"Never until the Missing Link is discovered," replied the Proprietor. "I
+don't believe a more human monkey will ever be found, and I attribute
+his wonderful intelligence to the fact that he associated entirely with
+human beings, almost from the day of his birth. I got him from the
+captain of a tramp steamer which traded to the West Coast, and I paid a
+goodish bit of money for him too. I have never dared to tell his early
+history as it was told to me, for fear I should be laughed at for a
+liar; but stranger things happen in the animal business than ever get
+into print, and if I dared risk my reputation by telling the things
+which actually occur in a menagerie, I should never need a Press Agent;
+but a plausible lie is accepted where a truth which sounds improbable is
+turned down."
+
+The Press Agent looked at him reproachfully, but agreed with the
+proposition.
+
+"Do you know, I have found that to be true when I have visited the
+newspaper offices," he said. "I have actually had to embroider some of
+the accounts of things which have happened here."
+
+"I suspected it, for I didn't recognize some of the stories when I saw
+them in print," answered the Proprietor, smiling at him approvingly. He
+consented to tell the history of Consul, the famous chimpanzee, when
+the Stranger expressed his entire credulity and the Press Agent assumed
+an encouraging and sympathetic attitude.
+
+[Illustration: _"Jocko, giving a howl of rage, danced madly up and
+down."_]
+
+"Of course, I have to take the ship captain's word for what happened
+before I bought him, but from the way the chimp developed and the
+intelligence he displayed after he came into my possession, I am
+prepared to believe it. He told me that he got him from the natives at
+the mouth of a small river on the West Coast, where he anchored his
+steamer to trade. They came off about the ship in their canoes, but he
+did not care for the rubber and ivory they had to offer and he was about
+to hoist anchor when one of them, who was in a small canoe with a woman,
+motioned to him to stop. The woman was crouched up in the stern, nursing
+what the captain thought was a baby, but when the man dragged it away
+from her, in spite of her voluble protest, he saw that it was a small
+chimpanzee. The man seemed desperately anxious to trade--and I imagine
+the captain's trade goods were not the sort to meet the entire approval
+of the missionaries--so that a bargain was concluded and the woman's
+grief allayed by a generous share of the purchase price. As nearly as he
+could make out, she had found the little thing in the jungle when it was
+only a few days old and had reared it in place of a baby which had just
+died. She was a low type of woman, even for an African savage, but the
+maternal instinct was strong enough to make her grieve for little
+Consul, as the captain christened him. The monkey grieved over the
+separation, too, but sailors make much of animals and he soon became
+reconciled to it.
+
+"Thousands of people saw him after I purchased him, and you can judge of
+the reputation he attained when I tell you that I was getting fifteen
+hundred dollars a week for him in Berlin when he died, and he was booked
+for the entire season at that price. People had seen him eat with a
+knife and fork, smoke a cigar, use a typewriter and do all of the stunts
+which simply aped humanity, but you had to live with the little beast to
+appreciate how intensely human he was. Everybody connected with the show
+loved him, and when I wanted to find any one of the employees who was
+off duty, or not in his proper place, I always went first to Consul's
+cage and I was pretty sure to locate him. That monkey was never still,
+and the things he would do and the pranks he would play off his own bat
+were more amusing than any of the things he had been taught.
+
+"When he was in company he was as well mannered as most men, but, of
+course, he had his prejudices and had to be watched. His special
+aversion was a negro, which is strange when you consider his early
+associations, and if one came around when he was loose he was apt to
+attack him. We had to consider that in traveling, for Consul always
+stopped at the hotels with his trainer and sat about the lobbies,
+smoking his cigar like any other guest, but if there were negro servants
+about, we had to be very careful not to let them come near him.
+
+"He had the reasoning power of a child of ten years old; he was patient
+when anything was wrong and we had to do disagreeable things to him,
+appreciating that it was for his benefit. Only once did we have to use
+force, when it was necessary to pull a tooth, and I am glad it wasn't
+oftener, for it took seven men to control him and they thought they had
+done a day's work when we finished. The last time he went abroad he was
+the life of the ship, but he pretty nearly killed himself. The doctor
+prescribed a cough medicine for him and Consul liked it so well that he
+got up in the night, after his trainer had gone to sleep, opened the
+valise in which it was kept and emptied the bottle. I guess there must
+have been laudanum in it, for they had to work over him the rest of the
+night to save him.
+
+[Illustration: _"All of his savage instincts were aroused."_]
+
+"He would walk the deck with the lady passengers, who made a great deal
+of him, and when the customary concert was given, nothing would do but
+that he must perform and then pass the plate for the collection. He was
+in evening dress and behaved like a perfect gentleman, and the
+collection was a large one. It was heaped on the plate, and he was just
+about to present it to the captain when Booker Washington stepped
+forward to make a contribution. The money for the Seaman's Home went
+flying to the four corners of the salon and the trainer had a difficult
+time in persuading Consul to retire without tearing the clothes off of
+the man whose only offense was his color. This was Consul's last voyage,
+for he contracted pleurisy and died in Berlin, and I felt worse over his
+death than I did over the burning of my whole menagerie in Baltimore a
+few years ago."
+
+"Have you found that early association with human beings makes the other
+animals easier to train?" asked the Stranger, and the Proprietor shook
+his head.
+
+"No; I would rather train one taken in the jungle than an animal born in
+captivity. They do raise the pumas in South America and have them about
+the houses as we do cats; but I wouldn't trust one of 'em. And as for
+the bigger cats, the lions and tigers, there is no such thing as taming
+them. They may be trained to do certain things, but they are never
+trustworthy. We had a queer illustration of that when I was traveling
+with a caravan circus in France. One of the lionesses had a litter of
+three cubs, and in the excitement of the moving and strange
+surroundings, she killed two of them. We took the other one away and the
+woman who cooked for us volunteered to raise it. She became very much
+attached to it and developed the theory that she could overcome its
+savage instincts by diet, and for a time it looked as if she were right.
+The beast was with her for about two years and grew to a fine animal,
+but she never let him taste raw food. One day, when he was comfortably
+lying before the stove, she pushed him with her foot to get him out of
+the way and he resented it. Whether it was that alone, or whether the
+odor of meat which she was about to cook appealed to him, I don't know;
+but all of his savage instincts were aroused and when we secured him we
+found that he had taken most of her scalp off."
+
+"It's funny how some people are always looking for a chance to get
+damages," said the Press Agent, settling himself comfortably in his
+chair. "We had a case of it when Merritt and I were running a dime
+museum out West. The freaks all lived together at a large boarding house
+and one morning, when they reported for duty, the 'Tattooed Lady' was
+missing. It was before the days when they were so common and we had
+spent a lot of money to have her decorated and made her our star
+attraction. Of course, none of the tattooing was visible when she was in
+street costume, but when she sat on the platform dressed in low neck and
+short skirts the lecturer had something to talk about, for the menagerie
+pictured on her was a thing of beauty, and the few choice texts like,
+'Be good and you will be happy,' which were scattered in between the
+animals, were highly moral and elevating, and that was one of the strong
+points of our show. Merritt used to spread himself when he was telling
+how she was shipwrecked on a desert island and held captive by the cruel
+cannibals, whose high priests spared her from the menu to tattoo her
+with the symbols of their heathenish worship. It gave him a great chance
+to come in strong on the moral part, when he explained about the texts
+and told how they were added after the cannibals had been converted to
+red flannel shirts, silk hats and a vegetable diet, by the missionaries,
+and I have seen ancient maiden ladies moved to tears by his recital. So
+when he had to give his lecture without her, he got mixed up and called
+attention to the marvelous growth of hair on the face of the 'Circassian
+Beauty,' thinking she was the 'Bearded Lady,' and nearly pulled the ears
+off of the 'Dog Faced Boy,' trying to explain that he was 'The Man With
+The Rubber Skin.' Of course, that made trouble among the freaks, who are
+a mighty touchy lot anyway, and I have noticed that trouble always comes
+in bunches in the show business, so I wasn't surprised when a husky guy
+that looked like a farmer came in with blood in his eye and asked for
+the manager. I looked around for Merritt, but he had gone around the
+corner to get something to drown his sorrow, so I slipped a piece of
+lead pipe under my coat and acknowledged the soft impeachment.
+
+[Illustration: _"A 'Tattooed Lady,' and she's all covered with
+picters."_]
+
+"'Look'ee here, wot kinder a skin game be youse fellers runnin' here?'
+says the guy, and I took a good grip on the lead pipe and tried to turn
+away wrath by a soft answer, and quoting from our advertisement that it
+was a highly moral and intellectual entertainment.
+
+"'Not by a dern sight, it ain't,' says he. 'It's a blasted man-trap to
+ketch the unwary, an' I'll have the law on ye an' make yer pay fer
+trifling with my young affections.' I have had some pretty tough things
+said to me in my day, but that was about the worst ever, and pretty
+nearly took my breath away, but he went right on.
+
+"'I deliver milk to that boardin' house down the street an' I see a
+likely lookin' gal there lately an' I wanted some one to help milk an'
+look after the house, so I asks her to marry me. She says she will, so
+we hitched up an' I never knew she was one o' yer dern freaks until it
+was too late. She says she's a "Tattooed Lady," an' she's all covered
+with picters.'
+
+"'Well, what's the matter with 'em?' says I. 'Aren't they good
+pictures?'
+
+"'Good enough,' says he, 'for them as likes 'em; but I don't hanker
+after no decorations o' that kind an', b'gosh, I'll make yer pay fer
+palmin' off a damaged article on me. She's all over snakes an' other
+beasts an' it makes me sick ter my stummick every time I thinks of 'em.'
+I tried to convince him that we were not responsible and that it was his
+wife's duty to have informed him.
+
+"'That's what I told her, dod gast her! But she says it's my own fault
+if I didn't know she was a "Tattooed Lady," because I never asked her,
+an' blamed if she isn't proud o' them picters, too.'"
+
+"How did you settle it--did he get damages?" asked the Stranger.
+
+"Damages!" exclaimed the Press Agent as he wiped the foam from his
+moustache. "Why, Merritt came in, and when he heard the guy's kick he
+lit right into him.
+
+"'Blame your skin!' he yelled. 'I've a good mind to have you arrested
+for stealing the pictures from my art gallery. I have a claim on 'em,
+for I paid for the liquor to keep a sailor drunk for six weeks while he
+was doing that job.' The Rube got onto the fact that she was valuable,
+so they adjourned to a saloon to talk it over."
+
+"With what result?" asked the Proprietor, as he rose from the table.
+
+"Well, Merritt got her back on the platform, the Rube sold his farm, and
+within six weeks he was wearing more yellow diamonds and throwing a
+bigger chest than the husband of a grand opera prima donna."
+
+
+
+
+FEEDING THE SERPENTS AND A GRAND TRANSFORMATION
+
+
+
+
+FEEDING THE SERPENTS AND A GRAND TRANSFORMATION
+
+
+The animals had received their evening meal when the Proprietor came
+from the Arena and joined the Stranger and the Press Agent at the table
+outside.
+
+"I can never understand the interest people take in seeing the
+carnivorous animals fed; it is no more than giving a bone to a dog," he
+said, as he took his seat. "And yet it is one of the best drawing
+features of the show, and the same people remain night after night to
+see the meat poked into the cages. If it were not for the prohibition of
+the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals I could give a
+feeding exhibition which would be novel and interesting, for
+comparatively few people have ever seen a snake eat.
+
+"It is because a snake will not eat unless it kills its own food," he
+continued in answer to a question from the Stranger. "Snakes are more
+particular feeders than any other animals, and they will not touch
+anything which is not alive when it is brought to them. This is the
+night for feeding them, and if you care to remain until the crowd has
+gone you can see how it is done. Long as I have been in the business, I
+learn something new every day, and I never saw a cobra fed artificially
+until last week, when Brandu, my Hindoo snake charmer, received one
+direct from India. It seems that they are cannibal snakes and live upon
+their own kind in India, but that would be too expensive a diet here,
+and he forces feed down its throat."
+
+The thousands of incandescent lights on the Dreamland tower went
+out--the signal that the barkers might cease from barking and the
+spielers spiel no more--until the morrow brought its fresh crowd of
+amusement seekers, and the Proprietor led the way into the Arena. Brandu
+and his two native assistants were carrying the boxes which contained
+the snakes into the big exhibition cage, and, when the three men
+joined them, the weirdness of the surroundings made a profound
+impression upon the Stranger. All of the lights in the Arena were
+extinguished, with the exception of the small cluster directly over
+their heads, and pairs of luminous spots from the great semicircle of
+cages at the outer edge of the building reminded him that the human
+beings in the cage were not the only interested spectators of the
+proceedings.
+
+[Illustration: _"A procession of sandwich men."_]
+
+The assistants carefully removed the great boas and pythons from the
+boxes, laying them on the floor, where they crawled lazily about, their
+delicate forked tongues vibrating like streaks of red flame, while
+Brandu removed a slat from a crate of rabbits and put a half-dozen of
+them on the floor. The little animals had no instinctive fear of the
+serpents, for they hopped about among them and over their wriggling
+bodies unconcernedly, but the snakes were hungry after a fast of two
+weeks and they wasted no time in getting to the business before them.
+The proceeding was the same in each case. A serpent would crawl up to
+the rabbit and place its nose, at which the little furry beast would
+sniff curiously, close to that of its prospective supper. The red forked
+tongue would pass rapidly over its face and the rabbit made no attempt
+to move. Whether it was the effect of some anæsthetic quality in the
+breath of the snake or the traditional charm of the serpent, it was hard
+to say, but the rabbit made no move to escape. Slowly but surely it
+yielded to the fascination of the snake, the large transparent ears
+dropped to the side of the head and the body muscles relaxed until the
+tickling of the serpent's tongue caused no reflex movement of the paws.
+
+The snake then carefully withdrew its head until the slim neck was in
+the form of a letter S, and when it again straightened out it was with
+the force of a released steel spring and the aim of the flat head was
+unerring. The stroke was so rapid that it was difficult for the eye to
+follow and the rabbit never knew what happened, for its body made a
+quick circle in the air and in less than a second all that was to be
+seen was one small paw protruding from the coiled body which had brought
+it a quick and merciful death. The jaws of the serpent have seized it by
+the snout and thrown it back into its coils and the first pressure kills
+it, although the ever tightening embrace continues until the bones are
+crushed within the unbroken skin, so that it can be easily swallowed.
+
+It is not swallowing in the ordinary sense of the word, for the snakes
+pull themselves over the rabbits as a glove is pulled over the finger,
+and the progress to the stomach can be watched through the length of the
+snake's neck. The snakes which were too small to manage a rabbit were
+fed on white rats and mice, but the process was the same in each case,
+except that the Hindoos held the rodents by their tails until the snakes
+had hypnotized them.
+
+"I suppose that this seems cruel to people because the rabbits are such
+harmless little beasts," said the Proprietor as the last bit of fur
+disappeared. "To my mind it is not half so cruel as hunting hares with
+guns and dogs, for death from the snake's blow is as quick and
+painless as that from a bullet, and there are no maimed and wounded
+animals to drag themselves away to lingering deaths in hiding. But now I
+will show you something which has never been known in this country."
+
+[Illustration: _"Brought the head of the cobra close to his face."_]
+
+One of the natives brought out a curiously woven circular basket which
+he handled with great care, and setting it in the middle of the cage
+retired to a respectful distance. Brandu crouched on the floor beside
+it, and, although the performance was not accompanied by the weird
+Oriental music which signaled the public appearances of the snake
+charmer, the tense expression of his face and the uncanniness of the
+surroundings made it sufficiently impressive, for he was about to handle
+the cobra de capello, the most venomous snake in all the great
+collection. He wasted no time in the pantomime and incantation of the
+ring performance, but quickly threw off the cover, and when the hooded
+head arose swaying above the edge of the basket, he started a low
+whistling and passed his slim brown hands with lightning rapidity above
+it. He was absolutely fearless, but the task before him demanded the
+concentration of all his thoughts and he seemed unconscious of the
+startling interruption of a fight between two of the lions, and the
+shouts and pistol-shots of the keepers who separated them.
+
+He never removed his gaze from the head of the serpent and his hands
+moved so rapidly that they were almost invisible until, quicker than a
+snake could strike, one of them darted down and caught the slim neck
+behind the distended hood. He gave a sharp exclamation of triumph and
+sprang to his feet, the cobra coiling its body about his bare brown arm
+and giving every indication of rage.
+
+"I am always glad when that part of the performance is over," said the
+Proprietor with a sigh of relief. "Of course, it is all in the day's
+work with Brandu and he has done it thousands of times, but some day he
+will be a fraction of a second too slow and then--well, I shall have to
+get another snake charmer. Watch him now and you will see something
+which only the men of his caste can do."
+
+Brandu's white teeth glistened as he smiled at the Proprietor and
+pointed first to his own eyes and then to those of the serpent. He
+brought the head of the cobra close to his face, his expression became
+fixed and stern and the pupils of his widely opened eyes, which had been
+dilated until the iris was but a narrow rim, contracted to the size of
+pin heads. The cobra gazed at him fixedly and the tense body slowly
+uncoiled from his arm and hung limp and motionless, and Brandu laid it
+on the floor as lifeless and inert as a piece of rope. One of his
+assistants handed him a glass containing a couple of raw eggs and,
+handling it as carelessly as if it were a harmless garter snake, he
+picked up the cobra and forced a tube of polished bamboo between its
+jaws. When he had poured the eggs through the tube he withdrew it and
+carefully replaced the snake in the basket, still apparently lifeless;
+but bending over he blew sharply into its face and the cobra was
+instantly reanimated into five feet of viciousness. Its head reared up
+above the edge, the spectacled hood distended in anger, but Brandu
+quickly clapped on the cover and the snake feeding was finished for two
+weeks.
+
+[Illustration: _"You're a blame fine figure of a fat man."_]
+
+"That is a great performance of Brandu's," said the Press Agent, "but it
+profits us nothing because the best part of it cannot be shown to the
+public. I never see a snake fed without thinking of something which
+happened when I was running a side show with the Greatest Show on Earth.
+
+"You know that the dime museum business was run to death while the craze
+lasted in this country, and freaks got so common that you couldn't throw
+a stone in the streets of any large city without hitting one of 'em.
+When the fickle public tired of giving up its dimes to see 'em, a guy
+named Merritt and myself had a choice collection on hand, and we went on
+the road with the big show for the summer, thinking perhaps our business
+would pick up in the fall. Our two great attractions were the biggest
+boa-constrictor in captivity, which we called 'Jointless Jake,' and the
+heaviest fat man in the world. That snake was about two hundred feet
+long, and while the fat man wasn't much on length, he held the record
+for belt measurement. Nine hundred and twenty-seven pounds he weighed,
+as we demonstrated on our own scales at every performance. Their feed
+bill was quite an item, as the snake took a half-dozen sheep every two
+weeks and the fat man, who was billed as 'Signor Adipose
+Avoirdupois'--Merritt invented that--needed about a side of beef every
+day.
+
+"Freaks are a jealous lot and as hard to manage as rival prima donnas,
+and these two monstrosities came to hate each other like poison. They
+were in different lines, but you may have noticed that the side show
+'professor' uses up most of the superlatives in the English language
+when he gives his lecture, and each of 'em seemed afraid that the other
+would get some of his share of the dictionary. Adipose used to look at
+Jake's coiled body as if he would like to sit on it and flatten it out,
+and the snake would return the glance with a naughty little twinkle in
+its eye, as if he was estimating how much it would have to stretch its
+skin to accommodate A. A. in its interior, until it made Merritt anxious
+about 'em.
+
+"'That blame fat fool will waste away and spoil his shape, if he don't
+stop worrying,' he says, and he cuts a lot of his talk out of the
+description of the snake and uses the words on Adipose. Maybe you think
+snakes are stupid, but they aren't, and the boa got the hump and refused
+to uncoil himself to show his length unless he got his full share of the
+spiel. It cheered Avoirdupois up, though, and when we moved to the next
+town he stood around to gloat over Jake when he was being moved from the
+traveling box to the exhibition cage. The snake hadn't been fed for ten
+days and he was good and lively as well as being out of temper, so when
+he caught sight of the Signor he scattered the boys with one flip of his
+tail and went for him.
+
+"I've heard of bear hugs, but I never saw such a squeezing as that boa
+gave poor Adipose. It was a long way around him, but the snake made
+about a dozen wraps and all we could see of the fat man was a pair of
+feet sticking out at one end of the coil and his face, which looked like
+a purple harvest moon, projecting from the other. Jake reaches out and
+gets hold of a tent peg with his tail, which gives him a purchase, and
+then he tightens up for fair and Adipose lets out a holler you could
+hear a mile.
+
+"Of course, we got busy with crowbars and jackscrews and tried to pry
+Jake off, but there was nothing doing and the harder we pried the closer
+he cinched up on Adipose. Merritt usually had a suggestion to make, so I
+looked at him and he was lost in thought, but in a minute he brightens
+up and calls for a rope.
+
+"'We can't pry the blame snake away from the man,' says he, as he tied
+the rope around the Signor's feet, 'so we'll try to pull the man away
+from the snake.' All hands fell to and pulled to beat four of a kind,
+but Jake just tightened up a bit and grinned and Adipose let out
+another holler.
+
+"'You need a traction engine on that rope,' says I when they gave it up
+as a bad job, and Merritt, who was looking a little discouraged, gave a
+whoop.
+
+"'Bring an elephant,' he yelled, and when one of the boys started off on
+a run for the menagerie, he called after him to 'make that order two
+elephants.' The Hathis came lumbering over, and Merritt tied the rope
+around the shoulders of one and put another rope around Jake's neck and
+the shoulders of the other elephant.
+
+"'Now pull, blame you!' says he, heading 'em in different directions and
+giving one of 'em a kick, and they put their shoulders against the
+ropes. It was a mighty interesting performance to every one but Adipose,
+who didn't seem to enjoy it at all, judging from the yells he let out.
+Jake was having the time of his life, and the harder the elephants
+pulled the tighter he squeezed the Signor, and when he felt that they
+were getting the better of him he made a supreme effort which kinked up
+every muscle in his body. But there was no holding on against those
+brutes, and pretty soon the fat man commenced to slip out from the
+coils, feet first. It was a queer thing to watch and his legs stretched
+so that I thought his knees would never come into sight. His legs had
+been about the size of barrels when the snake grabbed him, but between
+the stretching and the squeezing they were now three times as long and
+about as large as broomsticks. He weighed as much as ever when the
+elephants finally got him out, but the flesh was distributed differently
+and instead of being six feet tall and twelve feet around, he was twelve
+feet long and built in proportion. The snake was up against it, too, for
+he had cramped himself so with that last squeeze that he couldn't
+straighten out the kinks, and he kept in the same shape as when he was
+wrapped around the Signor. We tried to straighten him out, but it was no
+use; he just stayed coiled up like a spring and the boys rolled him
+around as if he were a barrel.
+
+"Merritt had kept cheerful as long as there was anything to be done, but
+tears came to his eyes when he looked at Adipose. The Signor was
+standing up, gazing at his feet, which he hadn't seen before in twenty
+years, and Merritt looked up at him and freed his mind.
+
+"'You're a blame fine figure of a fat man, aren't you, now?' says he.
+'Just on account of your confounded professional jealousy we lose our
+two star attractions, for that blamed snake is so kinked up that he
+isn't good for anything except to cut up into barrel hoops.'
+
+"The Signor was ashamed of himself and hadn't a word to say, so he just
+kept quiet and tried to get used to his new shape and taking a
+bird's-eye view of things. Merritt and I were feeling pretty blue when
+along comes Tody Hamilton, the circus press agent, and as soon as he saw
+what had happened he made a run for a trolley car.
+
+"'Don't let 'em get away!' he yelled back over his shoulder. 'This is
+the biggest scoop on record and I'm off for the printing-office.'
+
+[Illustration: _"Jake was having the time of his life, and the harder
+the elephants pulled the tighter he squeezed the Signor."_]
+
+"'It'll make a good newspaper story, all right; but where do we come in
+on it?' says Merritt, looking mournfully at Adipose.
+
+"Well, a couple of hours later I had to go into the city to order some
+new togs for the Signor, who looked as if he were dressed in a
+particularly baggy bathing suit since he had been stretched out, and the
+first thing I saw was a procession of sandwich men marching down the
+street. The ink wasn't dry on the posters, but Tody had been busy, and
+there in flaming red letters was the announcement--
+
+      JUST ARRIVED AT THE
+           BIG SHOW!
+
+   DON'T MISS SEEING THEM!!!
+
+   LENGTHY LOUIS, THE TALLEST
+     MAN IN THE UNIVERSE!!!
+
+ CIRCULAR SAM, THE MOST GIGANTIC
+   HOOP SNAKE EVER CAPTURED!!!
+
+
+
+
+THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE AND THE INCONSIDERATE PYTHON
+
+
+
+
+THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE AND THE INCONSIDERATE PYTHON
+
+
+The conventional skirt dance has long ceased to be a novelty on the
+vaudeville stage, but as it is performed by "La Belle Selica" in the
+Arena at Dreamland it holds the interest of that most exacting
+audience--a crowd of Coney Island pleasure seekers. It is not because
+Selica is pre-eminent among dancers, but on account of the unusual and
+dangerous stage setting; for she performs in the large exhibition cage,
+surrounded by a half dozen lionesses, each animal seated on a separate
+pedestal. Any one of the huge beasts could crush the dancer with a
+single blow of a massive paw, and the great jaws which snap viciously at
+her tiny feet as she kicks them before their faces are sufficiently
+powerful to crush the shin-bone of an ox.
+
+She is apparently without fear of them, for she dances gracefully from
+one to the other, flicking them across their faces with the light switch
+which she carries for her only protection, and kicking over their heads
+and into their very mouths, always missing the answering snap of the
+jaws by the fraction of an inch, and acknowledging it with a smile as
+she whirls away to repeat the performance before another pedestal. The
+lionesses see the performance many times in the course of a season, but
+they never lose interest in it and they do not remove their eyes from
+Selica from the time she enters the cage until she drives them out
+before her. So long as she is on her feet and agile enough to escape the
+swift stroke of a paw or the snapping jaws, she is safe; for a lioness
+would not jump at her from a pedestal; but there is always the chance of
+a slip or a false step and then----!!!
+
+It happened once, and caused a suspension of Selica's performance for
+two months during the Pan-American Exposition at Buffalo, for Grace, the
+largest lioness, was on her before she could recover herself; and it
+required the efforts of Bostock and all of his trainers to beat back the
+beasts who were maddened by the sight and smell of blood and to rescue
+the unconscious woman from the cage. They have never forgotten that
+moment of rebellion which was so nearly successful, and they are ever
+watchful for another opportunity to avenge the many cuts of the
+training whip which they received in the course of their schooling. But
+Selica is also watchful, and although Grace had latterly done nothing
+particularly out of the way, the wonderful sixth sense which experienced
+trainers always acquire warned her that the animal should be regarded
+with suspicion. The beast had become nervous; a little more sullen than
+usual when ordered to leave her den for the exhibition cage, and a
+trifle slow and rebellious when told to jump up on her allotted
+pedestal.
+
+[Illustration: _"Now, if you'll kindly give me your attention."_]
+
+Constant association with the wild animals begets carelessness but
+Selica, with the scars of Grace's sharp claws still visible on her back
+and shoulders, was quick to notice the change and especially careful,
+before opening the door from the den to the runway, to look through the
+observation hole and make sure that the lioness was not crouched for a
+spring. Grace had been particularly sullen in the afternoon and she was
+growling ominously when Selica went to get her for the evening
+performance, but when the woman saw the three little furry balls which
+were huddled in a corner of the den she understood and forgave all. The
+cubs were no larger than St. Bernard puppies, but Grace apparently
+considered them worth fighting for; and Selica's dance was given that
+night with only five lionesses in the cage, and the Proprietor told the
+Stranger the reason for the empty pedestal.
+
+"Wait until after the performance and I will take them out of the cage
+and show them to you," he said; and the Stranger, remembering a
+tradition to the effect that robbing a lioness of her cubs is a
+dangerous feat, looked forward with a great deal of interest to the
+after-piece.
+
+"We can't trust the rearing of the cubs to Grace," said the Proprietor,
+as he stood in front of her cage after the audience had been dismissed.
+"The close proximity of the other animals in the Arena and the curiosity
+of the thousands of people who come here every day would make her so
+crazy that she would destroy them, so I must get them a foster mother. I
+have sent to New York for a bitch with pups, and in a couple of days I
+will show you a happy family." The cubs were in the center of the cage
+and Grace stood over them, snarling and looking with blazing eyes at the
+group in front of it; but Selica's voice from the runway and a rattling
+of the door at the back distracted her attention, and as she sprang at
+the door the Proprietor darted a hand between the bars and seized one of
+the cubs, drawing it safely out a half second before the enraged mother
+landed against the bars with a force which made them rattle.
+
+The poor beast was almost frantic, but the same maneuver was twice
+repeated, and in spite of her fierce attacks on doors and bars the
+Proprietor, who had acquired through his lifetime association with the
+great cats as much of their quickness of movement as it is given to mere
+man to learn, removed the three cubs without receiving a scratch.
+
+Poor helpless little creatures they were, and it was difficult to
+realize that they would soon grow into beasts as powerful as the
+ferocious Baltimore, the terror of trainers, who was answering Grace's
+lamentations with roars which fairly shook the building, from his cage
+on the other side of the Arena.
+
+[Illustration: _"Looked like the pennant of a man-o'-war."_]
+
+"That animal was bred in captivity, born and raised in our menagerie in
+England," said the Proprietor after he had placed the cubs in charge of
+one of the keepers. "I suppose that's what makes him such a bad beggar
+to handle. Give me the jungle-bred lion to train, every time, for after
+the manhandling and discomfort of his capture and transportation to the
+coast by the natives, he appreciates the care and humanity of a
+civilized trainer. These cubs which are raised in captivity are always
+played with and teased by the employees and visitors, and their first
+knowledge of their strength comes to them accidentally when they hurt a
+man without meaning to do it; but they soon learn to connect cause and
+effect, and then it is time to watch out for 'em. A jungle-bred lion is
+pretty much cock o' the walk until he is snared or trapped, and in his
+first experience with men he is vanquished and realizes how useless is
+his great strength against the nets and ropes which entangle him. The
+cub born in captivity is familiar with men from the first, and plays
+with them like a kitten until one day he is out of sorts or is
+accidentally hurt in a frolic and the swift cut of his razor-like claws
+makes his playmate or tormentor drop him and leave him in peace. That
+makes it hard for the trainer when he takes him in hand, for although
+the cub may be subdued, he remembers that he was once victorious and
+watches his chance. Jack Bonavita, the greatest trainer who ever went
+into a lion's cage, would have two good arms to-day if Baltimore had
+been born in the Nubian desert instead of in Manchester."
+
+They stood in front of Baltimore's cage for a moment, admiring the
+swelling muscles of the great beast as he sprang from side to side,
+shaking his shaggy mane and roaring defiance at the world, and then
+turned to go to the white-topped table in front of the Arena. In the
+doorway they met the Press Agent, looking anything but cheerful and
+muttering maledictions on the heads of all city editors. The Proprietor
+told him of the new arrivals in the Arena, and suggested sending the
+announcement of the birth to the papers.
+
+"A fat chance I'd stand of having it printed," he grumbled. "Here I've
+worked half the season and never given 'em a story that wasn't pretty
+nearly true, and to-day when I take them that account of Morelli and the
+jaguar they turn me down and holler 'fake.' Let me take one of those
+cubs and stripe it over with a little black paint, and to-morrow morning
+every newspaper in New York will have a photographer down here to take
+pictures of 'the only hybrid lion-tiger cub ever born,' and all of the
+space jerkers will be buttonholing me for a three column, front page
+story."
+
+The arrival of the waiter with soothing beverages soon brought back the
+customary smile to his genial face and the Proprietor's suggestion that
+perhaps he had embroidered some of the stories just a trifle, aroused
+only a good-natured protest.
+
+"The worst thing about the press agent's profession is that he has to
+risk his eternal salvation by making up plausible lies to satisfy the
+newspapers when he could give 'em better stories which are actually true
+if they would take 'em on his say so," he said, as he wiped the froth
+from his mustache. "I remember once when a guy named Merritt and
+myself were running a snake show in New York that we couldn't pay the
+rent because the papers wouldn't give us any publicity, although we had
+the finest collection of wrigglers that was ever gotten together. We
+were running it on the dead level, nary a fake about it, and Merritt's
+lecture was highly instructive and interesting and more than half true;
+but we saw that we couldn't win out at the game unless we crooked it. We
+were running so far behind that the only thing which saved us from a
+dispossess was the fact that they couldn't get a constable who would
+carry the snakes out to the sidewalk; but Merritt was a resourceful cuss
+and I felt confident that he would figure out some scheme to win out.
+
+[Illustration: _"Kicking over their heads and into their very mouths."_]
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'it's necessary for us to give 'em a sensation. We've
+tried to run this game as a purely moral and instructive entertainment,
+but we need the money and I reckon we've got to spring a cold deck on
+'em. I guess you've got to stand for being attacked by an untamable,
+man-eating python.'
+
+"'You can count me out on that,' says I. 'Every paper in the city would
+write me up as a victim of the demon Rum.' Merritt looked discouraged
+for a minute, but his face suddenly lighted up and I knew he had found a
+way.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'if we only take half of our usual allowance of
+fire-water to-night we will have enough cash to buy some paint. Now
+there's that big white python; the only specimen ever captured, the
+"pythonatus fluidum lactalis giganticus,"' says he. That was one trouble
+with Merritt; he'd get so stuck on the language which he manufactured
+that he couldn't leave it out, even in our business consultations, and
+it used up a lot of time. 'That python is the straight goods,' says he,
+'but he doesn't catch their eyes, so I'll paint the blame snake red,
+white and blue and christen him the "anacondus flagelum americanibus e
+pluribus unum," and give the reporters something to work on,' says he.
+'That'll work up the snakologists and set 'em writing in the papers to
+prove that there isn't any such thing; but we've got the answer to
+that, for we can show 'em one at twenty-five cents per.'
+
+"I never could stand for flim-flamming the generous public, but my meal
+ticket was punched so full of holes that it looked like a porous
+plaster, and I consented. Merritt spent most of the night decorating
+that python, and in the morning it looked like the pennant of a
+man-o'-war. I had to sit up and watch him, for he had the artistic
+temperament, and he was so carried away by his enthusiasm that if I
+hadn't restrained him he would have put on the coat-of-arms of the
+United States, eagle, motto and all.
+
+"'Now,' says he, when he had finished and stepped back to admire his
+work, 'if that blame snake's own mother would know him if she met him on
+the street, I'm a Dutchman. If this don't make 'em sit up and take
+notice, then I'll go to night school to learn the show business.'"
+
+"How did the scheme work?" asked the Proprietor, as the Press Agent
+paused to make the grand hailing sign of distress to the waiter.
+
+"Work!" he answered. "How does a fake always work in New York? Why, P.
+T. Barnum had the mold for his petrified man made from the legs of one
+man and the body of another, and he didn't even take the trouble to
+smooth off the ridges where the edges met when he cast it in Portland
+cement. But that didn't prevent all of the scientific sharps who
+inspected it from certifying to its genuineness. His mermaid was
+manufactured from a codfish skin and a stuffed monkey; but the public
+stood for that, too, and he made a fortune out of 'em. Maybe you can't
+fool all of the people all of the time, but you can fool most of 'em
+most of the time; especially if they live in little old New York. Of
+course, we didn't pull off such a success as Barnum did; but we had no
+kick coming when we counted up the receipts for the next week. Merritt's
+lecture was a work of art and he manufactured language at a rate which
+would have given Noah Webster nervous prostration when he christened the
+python 'Old Glory,' and told about its combining the venomous qualities
+of the cobra and the strength of the boa-constrictor. The python was so
+stuck on its new colors that it nearly broke its neck turning around to
+admire itself and everything went lovely. Of course, there was the usual
+howl from the snakologists who knew it all, and 'Old Subscriber,'
+'Citizen,' 'Pro Bono Publico' and the rest of the bunch wrote columns to
+the newspapers, denouncing us as frauds.
+
+[Illustration: _Grace snarled over the cubs._]
+
+"You know how those things work; everybody puts up an argument and then
+it's up to the fellow who is making the bluff to back it up with an
+offer to donate a sum of money to some charitable institution if he
+can't deliver the goods. We were well ahead of the game as a result of
+the advertising and had about two thousand to the good and Merritt got
+awful chesty. He had lied about that snake so much that he believed in
+it himself and it made me a little nervous one night when he offered to
+donate two thousand dollars to the 'Home for Decrepit Side Show Fakirs'
+if any one could produce another specimen like this one, short of the
+head waters of the Amazon. I wasn't scared so much by that as by what I
+feared he might say, for I knew they couldn't get another if they raked
+the universe with a fine-tooth comb, and sure enough, he was carried
+away by his enthusiasm and offered to bet our entire bank roll that the
+snake was a genuine 'American flag', such as had never been exhibited in
+any country.
+
+"It was just our luck that there was a half-loaded tin-horn gambler in
+the audience that night; one of the kind that wears a yellow diamond and
+a checked suit with a white stove-pipe hat; and the only part of the
+speech that he understood was that somebody wanted to make a bet. That
+raised his sporting blood, and he climbed up to the platform and pulled
+out a roll of yellow boys that would choke a dog and peeled off twenty
+centuries.
+
+"'I don't know much about snakes which bromide won't make chase
+themselves back to the woods,' says he as he plunked 'em down on the
+table. 'I ain't got your gift of gab, but money talks and I've got this
+pile to say that you can't tell the truth to save your neck. Just stack
+up your pile alongside of that and then trot out your snakelet.' I was
+feeling pretty sore on Merritt for making such a bluff, but, of course,
+we had to make good and between us we covered the bet. We had glass
+cages full of snakes all around the platform, but 'Old Glory' was in a
+big chest covered with gilt figures and brass chains and fastened with a
+padlock. Merritt was mad clear through at having his veracity
+questioned, but he looked pretty confident as he stuck the key in the
+lock.
+
+"'It's a shame to take the money,' says he, as he eyed the gambler, 'but
+there's an old saying about the mental capacity of a man that is
+speedily separated from his bank roll, and I reckon you were away from
+home the last time the fool killer called.' The gam just smiled and kept
+his eye on the stakes, and Merritt gives the chains a rattle to wake up
+'Old Glory' and throws back the lid of the chest.
+
+"'Now,' says he, turning to the audience, 'if you'll kindly give me your
+attention I'll show you one of the most marvelous mysteries of Nature.
+It was procured by one of our special agents at the head waters of the
+Amazon at tremendous expense. It is a unique representative of the
+reptilian family and the sight of it should arouse pride in the hearts
+of all patriotic Americans; for as he unwinds his sinuous coils you will
+observe that while his head and neck are blue, the body, down to the
+tip of the tail, is marked with thirteen alternate stripes of red and
+white, giving this marvelous creature the appearance of being wrapped in
+that glorious emblem of liberty which waves over the land of the brave
+and the home of the free.' Merritt stops then, throwing out his chest
+and sticking his hand into the bosom of his coat to wait for the
+customary applause from the gallery to subside; but instead of the usual
+glad hands he was greeted with a roar of laughter and cat-calls and when
+he turned to look at the snake box, there was 'Old Glory' crawling out,
+looking ashamed of himself, for he was as white as the day he was born."
+
+"What happened?" asked the Proprietor as the Press Agent sighed.
+
+"Well, Merritt always had presence of mind, and as the sport gathered up
+our hard earned shekels he grabbed me by the arm and hurried me from the
+building. He knew that a Bowery audience was apt to follow cat-calls
+with antique eggs and vegetables of last season's vintage, and five
+minutes later we were trying to drown our sorrow.
+
+"'Jim,' says Merritt, 'I made a big mistake, for I should have tattooed
+him. His beauty was only skin deep and the blame snake shed his
+skin.'"
+
+
+
+
+THE ANIMAL BAROMETER AND THE ETERNAL FEMININE
+
+
+
+
+THE ANIMAL BAROMETER AND THE ETERNAL FEMININE
+
+
+Uncle Sam spends a large amount of money to forecast the weather
+twenty-four hours in advance, and the farmers and seafaring folk watch
+the bulletins no more eagerly than do the owners of the many shows whose
+harvest time is the brief summer season at Coney Island. Bad weather,
+especially if it comes on the first or last day of the week or a legal
+holiday, means a loss of hundreds of dollars to them, for if the skies
+are threatening, the holiday makers seek their pleasures nearer home and
+there are fewer people to give up their dimes and quarters under the
+seductive wheedling of the "barkers." Most of the show people look
+anxiously at the sky before retiring for the night, but there is one of
+them who finds an absolutely reliable forecast within the walls of his
+own building. Perhaps the signs and portents could not be translated by
+the weather clerk, but the Proprietor of the trained animal exhibition
+at Dreamland has been all of his life the companion of his charges, and
+has learned to recognize the meaning of unusual behavior or the shade of
+change in their voices which indicates an approaching storm.
+
+There was not a cloud to be seen, and every star in the heavens was
+trying to rival the brilliant electric lights on the great tower as he
+sat at the café table in front of the Arena with the Stranger and the
+Press Agent after the night's performance was over, but he gave an
+exclamation of disappointment as a half-smothered roar came from the
+throat of one of the lions in the building.
+
+"Rain to-morrow!" he said as the grumbling roar spread from cage to cage
+about the great semicircle. His companions smiled incredulously as they
+looked at the cloudless sky, but he repeated his prediction when the
+Stranger read "Fair and warmer to-morrow" from one of the evening
+papers. "I know all about the 'high and low pressure areas,'" he said,
+as he glanced at the chart. "A man in the show business has to study
+everything which may influence the attendance, but the behavior of my
+animals is a better barometer for local conditions than any aneroid
+which the Weather Bureau owns. In spite of the clear sky and the
+official predictions, I would wager that we shall have a bad storm
+within the next twenty-four hours, for those lions have the inherited
+knowledge of hundreds of generations of jungle-bred ancestors whose food
+supply depended largely upon the weather conditions."
+
+"Do the other animals possess the same barometric accomplishments?"
+asked the Stranger skeptically, and the Proprietor laughed as he invited
+him to come inside and judge for himself. The Arena was always an
+uncanny place at night, for in the dim light only the glowing eyes of
+the animals could be distinguished in the cages, and the snarls and
+growls which came from behind the gratings conjured up visions of what
+might happen if one of the animals were loose and crouching on the seats
+of the auditorium or in the galleries, waiting for a meal of human
+flesh; but to-night it was worse than usual, for the unwonted
+restlessness of the animals was apparent even to the untrained senses of
+the Stranger.
+
+The carnivora in captivity retain the habits of their relatives of the
+jungle and are more alert at night than in the daytime, but following a
+hard day's work in the exhibition cage they usually settle down for a
+few hours of sleep after receiving their evening allowance of meat.
+Although it was long past their resting time, not an eye was closed, and
+hundreds of pairs of bright spots were visible in the darkness as the
+beasts paced uneasily from end to end of their narrow dens. The
+elephants, whose arduous duties in the ring and on the ballyhoo brought
+such leg weariness that they were usually glad to be shackled for the
+night, were swaying their huge bodies from side to side and straining at
+the stout chains which fastened them and the shrill trumpeting of Tom,
+the largest one, was echoed and repeated by his companions, Roger and
+Alice. The roaring of the lions and the snarling of the tigers was
+mocked by the hideous laugh of the hyenas, and the discord of the
+strange noises was so disagreeable that the Stranger was relieved when
+they left the Arena and returned to the comparative quiet of the
+white-topped table.
+
+[Illustration: _"Every one of the great beasts jumped for her."_]
+
+"It will be a severe storm," said the Proprietor as the waiter took
+their orders. "Any impending change makes them uneasy, but when every
+animal in the menagerie is in the state of excitement which you noticed
+to-night you can be assured that it means a very decided disturbance. It
+is a thing which animal trainers are ever watchful about, for most of
+the training is done at night, and it is not safe to work with them when
+they are in that frame of mind."
+
+"But you give your advertised performances just the same," said the
+Press Agent.
+
+"That's a different matter," answered the Proprietor. "When the Arena is
+lighted up and filled with people, the attention of the animals is
+distracted and they forget their nervousness, but a rehearsal at night
+is a lonesome proceeding, at best, and as the trainer devotes his
+attention to a single animal at a time it leaves the others free to
+think up mischief or to give way to their unreasoning fear. I had that
+borne in upon me in a way I shall never forget a few years ago when I
+was a younger hand at the business. I knew a good deal about handling
+animals, but not as much about managing men as I have learned since, and
+I used to forget that giving an order was not the same thing as seeing
+that it was executed. There was a trainer named Barton in my employ who
+did a pretty fair act with a group of six lions, but he was a brutal
+sort of a chap and punished his animals so severely that they went
+through their performance on the jump so as to get out of the exhibition
+cage, where blows were more plentiful than kind words. His act was a
+winner, all right, for he was absolutely fearless and the animals put up
+a bluff of snarling and snapping which made it exciting, but I disliked
+the man so much that I was glad to farm him out for a ten weeks'
+engagement on the vaudeville circuit.
+
+"He wasn't a bad-looking chap and when he came back from his tour he
+brought with him one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. She
+was an Egyptian who had been brought to this country with a troupe of
+dancers for one of the big exhibitions, and he met her and married her
+when they were performing in the same theater. Of course, I had
+absolutely no use for an Egyptian dancer with my show and I made the
+marriage an excuse to get rid of Barton; but he begged me to keep him on
+the plea that he was teaching her to do his act with the lions. She was
+so beautiful that I realized that she would be a great drawing card if
+she developed into a good trainer, so I consented and signed a contract
+with him for another year. I regretted it when I saw the first
+rehearsal, for it was painfully evident that she went into the cage only
+because she was more afraid of her husband than she was of the lions,
+and I didn't blame her; for while I might interfere to prevent
+ill-treatment of the lions, which were my property, I had no authority
+to protect her from his cruelty. They did most of the rehearsing at
+night, and I trusted to the fear which Barton had instilled in the lions
+to keep them from attacking her, for he always stood at the bars and
+they would cower down at the sound of his voice. You know it is never
+safe for two people to be in the cage with a group of animals at the
+same time unless they stand back to back and keep in one place, for if
+they are moving about an animal may run into one while endeavoring to
+escape from the other, and even the blow from a lion's tail might knock
+a man from his feet and then there would be trouble.
+
+[Illustration: _"Jim," says Merritt, ... "there is a great advantage in
+having a squaw for the top part of that there fish."_]
+
+"Poor little Leotta used to go into the cage and try to keep the
+tell-tale tremble out of her voice when she gave her commands, but she
+could never learn to concentrate her whole attention on the animals and
+give up looking for a sign of approval from Barton out of the corner of
+her eye. I made it a point to see that there was always plenty of
+assistance near in case of accidents, and gave Barton strict orders to
+keep her out of the cage when the animals were under the influence of
+'weather fear.' It was difficult for me to instruct or warn Leotta, for
+she understood English very little; but I helped her all I could, and
+gave her husband to understand that I would not allow any ill-treatment.
+
+"In spite of all my precautions, I was always uneasy when she was in the
+cage, and when I had to be away from the show she was constantly in my
+mind. I had to go to the wharf one afternoon to superintend the
+unloading of a new lot of animals which had been sent from our English
+quarters, and owing to delays at the custom house it was late at night
+before I could start back for the show. Perhaps I had absorbed some of
+the weather wisdom of the animals from long association with them, but,
+at any rate, I was uneasy at the delays and as I whizzed along in the
+trolley I congratulated myself on my foresight in having warned Barton,
+as the thunder heads were gathering and I knew the animals would have
+the jumps and be unsafe to work with. But my heart sank as I drew near
+the building and saw that it was brilliantly lighted up, for that could
+only mean one thing at that time of night--Leotta must be rehearsing.
+The trainers usually have but one small cluster of lights, but I had
+ordered the electrician to turn on all the switches when she was in the
+cage, as I thought she would be less frightened and the animals more
+tractable in the full light.
+
+"My guess was right: Barton, in disobedience of orders, had made her go
+into the cage, and he had taken advantage of my absence to break our
+iron-clad rule which forbids a trainer to drink. I saw the whole
+situation as soon as I entered the building, and I would have given the
+whole show to have the little woman safely on the right side of the
+bars. The animals in the dens were raising a worse row than they did
+to-night, and the lions in Leotta's group had forgotten their fear of
+the trainer in their greater fear of the approaching storm. They were
+ugly, and Barton, who was more than half-seas over, stood at the bars
+shouting abuse at his wife and the lions and jeering at her evident
+terror. I saw that the other trainers and keepers appreciated the
+danger, for they were gathered around, holding iron bars, Roman candles
+and pistols; but they had sense enough to know that any interference
+which would draw his attention from the cage would precipitate the
+trouble, and none of them could make Leotta appreciate the danger of her
+position. I went up to him quietly and told him that I thought he had
+better call the rehearsal off for the night, intending to square
+accounts with him as soon as Leotta was safely out of the cage; but the
+drink was in his brain and he turned on me and cursed me. Leotta gave a
+scream of terror as the brute turned his back on the cage and, as if by
+a preconcerted plan, every one of the six great beasts jumped for her.
+
+"Barton knew that the game was up, and in his drunken rage he attacked
+me and it kept my hands full to manage him; but the others rushed for
+the cage, and while Bonavita and Stevenson beat off the lions with the
+help of the keepers on the outside who were firing pistols and Roman
+candles and using fire-extinguishers through the bars, Bobby Mack picked
+up Leotta and carried her outside. Of course, that ended Leotta's career
+in the show business and finished Barton's employment with me. The poor
+little thing's beauty was gone, for a lion's claws make deep cuts, and
+it was many a day before she was able to leave the hospital. You can see
+that I have reason to be confident of the accuracy of the predictions of
+my weather bureau, for if there had been no thunderstorm brewing I might
+have developed a sensational lion act."
+
+"Or if Leotta had understood English," commented the Press Agent, as he
+beckoned to the waiter. "Of course, it is sometimes an advantage to have
+performers who can't converse with the audience, but it is mighty
+inconvenient if they can't understand the orders of the boss. I lost the
+chance of making a lot of money once, because a squaw who was working
+for us couldn't understand the white man's lingo. A guy named Merritt
+and myself were disappointed about getting a concession for a snake show
+at the Pan-American Exposition, and we found ourselves broke in Buffalo,
+which is separated from the Bowery by about five hundred miles of very
+tough walking when you haven't got the price of a railway ticket.
+Merritt was mad clean through at being thrown down by the Exposition
+managers, but he was an inventive genius and I knew that he would figure
+out a way to raise the price of transportation.
+
+[Illustration: _"A howl of terror from the platform."_]
+
+"'Jim,' says he as we counted up our available assets and found that
+they were pretty well along toward a minus quantity, 'it makes me dead
+sore to be turned down this way without getting a run for our money, and
+it's up to us to increase our capital and incidentally give the bunch
+that done us dirt the double cross. Get your think tank working and see
+what it will produce.' I couldn't see a way out, but when a squaw from
+the Tonawanda Reservation, who was selling trailing arbutus, came up to
+us and offered us a nosegay, Merritt gives a whoop and claps me on the
+shoulder.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'I've got it and we'll make our everlasting fortunes!'
+He commenced to question the squaw, but all the English she knew was
+'ten cent a bunch,' and he didn't make much headway until a big buck
+Injin who had been watching her from across the street came over and
+butted in. It appeared that he was her husband, and when Merritt stated
+his proposition the buck accepted the terms without the formality of
+consulting the squaw. When the Exposition opened we had a big tent on an
+open lot across from the main entrance, with a life-sized picture of
+'The Marvelous Mermaid' as big as a house. As I remarked, Merritt was an
+inventive genius and he had worked up a scheme to deceive the confiding
+public. He had provided a platform and carefully cut out a hole so that
+the squaw could stand on the ground and the edges of the hole fitted
+snugly about her waist. He made her lean forward and rest her chin in
+her hands in the conventionally accepted mermaid position, and then he
+fitted a fish tail which lay along the top of the platform, and it was
+so skillfully joined to her that it looked as if it grew there. She was
+a good-looking squaw and she certainly played her part and made an
+interesting picture.
+
+"Of course, he couldn't explain to her what he wanted her to do, but he
+would tell the buck, who would carefully translate and impress the
+instructions upon her memory with the aid of a bale stick. The thing
+which he put most stress upon was that she was to remain absolutely
+still, no matter what happened. I sold the tickets and put up the spiel
+on the front, and Merritt lectured inside and we did a land-office
+business. Lots of smart guys came around and tried to get gay with the
+mermaid, but she couldn't understand their joshing and never cracked a
+smile. The blame tent caught fire one night when it was filled with
+people, and she had such a wholesome recollection of the bale stick
+that she kept as still as a cigar-store Indian until we had cleared the
+place and put the fire out.
+
+"'Jim,' says Merritt as he looked her over admiringly after that
+experience, 'there is a great advantage in having a squaw for the top
+part of that there fish. She can't understand what the Willie boys say
+to her and nothing feazes her. A white gal would have had hysterics and
+given the whole snap away.' It gave Merritt a lot more confidence and we
+felt pretty safe after that experience, and neglected to have the buck
+repeat his bale-stick admonitions to her upon the necessity of
+cultivating repose of manner. Everything was lovely and we were turning
+hundreds of people away and making more money than the big show. One
+afternoon we were playing to a record house and Merritt was doing
+himself proud on his lecture.
+
+"'Ladies and gentlemen,' says he, 'I have the honor to present to this
+intelligent audience a creature which is commonly, but erroneously,
+supposed to be extinct at the present day; but you have before you a
+living and convincing proof that mermaids still exist. I confess that
+until I was able to obtain this unique specimen, which was captured
+while basking in the sun and singing a love song upon an iceberg in the
+Antarctic Ocean, I shared the opinions of my fellow scientists that the
+mermaid was a fabulous or extinct creature; for during a lifetime
+devoted to exhibiting the mysterious marvels of nature to the American
+public it had never been my good fortune to acquire one. You will
+observe that she is half woman and half fish, and she is perfectly
+helpless when out of the water. She is unfortunately unable to express
+herself in any known tongue; in fact, she has never uttered a sound
+since her capture and we fear that she has lost her voice, which--' Just
+then he was interrupted by a howl of terror from the platform, which was
+followed by a roar of laughter from the audience, and when he turned he
+saw the squaw standing up and trying to wrap the fake tail around a pair
+of well-developed, copper-colored legs. Her face was as pale as a
+squaw's face could get and Merritt knew the jig was up. I was peeking in
+the door, and when I saw what had happened I gathered up the box-office
+receipts and faded away. I met Merritt that evening in our usual saloon,
+and underneath a pair of black eyes and a battered-up phiz I could see
+that he was wearing a look of deep disgust.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'this is what comes from pinning your faith to a woman
+and not appreciating the weakness of the sex. She faced the danger of
+being burned alive and never turned a hair; but when she saw a measly
+little mouse crawl under the platform she busted up the whole show.'"
+
+The Stranger said good-night and started for the city, but before he
+reached the railway station he was drenched by the downpour which the
+Proprietor had predicted.
+
+
+
+
+MAKING A STAR LION AND AN INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE MEETING
+
+
+
+
+MAKING A STAR LION AND AN INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE MEETING
+
+
+"You were not in this part of the country when New York was in an uproar
+for two days over the escape of one of my lions," said the Proprietor to
+the Stranger as they joined the Press Agent. "I suppose that ninety per
+cent. of the people who remember it think that it was all a fake, but I
+can assure you that I put in the most strenuous forty-eight hours of my
+career while he was loose, and it pretty nearly decided me to give up
+the show business. It was my first experience at running an independent
+show, and after great persuasion I had induced my father to let me bring
+some boxing kangaroos, two young lions and Wallace, a fine big brute
+about fifteen years old, from our English establishment to the States.
+Wallace was already a famous--or infamous--lion in England, where he
+had the score of three trainers to his credit. He had received the name
+of 'The Mankiller' over there, and they were rather relieved to have me
+get him out of the country.
+
+"His last victim was a Frenchman, one of the best-known trainers in the
+business, and he went into the cage to subdue Wallace on a wager. He
+won, and a remarkable performance it was, but I won't take the time to
+tell you about that now. He made just one little mistake: his vanity got
+the better of him when he turned his back on the lion to bow to the
+audience after remaining in the cage for ten minutes. As I said, he won
+the bet, and it about paid the funeral expenses of what was left of him.
+After that the only man who could go near Wallace was a half-breed
+American Indian from up near Cape Cod; Broncho Boccacio, he called
+himself. I don't know what the other half of him was, and I don't
+remember how he happened to be with our English show, but all sorts and
+conditions of men drift into the animal training business. At any rate,
+he was the only man who could do anything with Wallace, and that wasn't
+much. He would get into the cage and chase him around a bit and then
+jump out quick--always backward after seeing what happened to the
+Frenchman. I brought him along to take especial charge of the brute. It
+took a couple of days to get the animals through the customs, and in the
+meantime I cast about for quarters and finally rented a stable on
+Eighteenth Street to keep them in until I should secure an engagement."
+He took a pencil from his pocket and drew a plan on the white table top.
+
+[Illustration: _"There was a loose lion downstairs and a nurse and two
+children in the loft."_]
+
+"The stable was arranged in this way: here in the front was the carriage
+house with these narrow stairs at the side leading up to the loft. On
+each side of the door was a window facing on the street, and back of the
+carriage room was the stable proper--two stalls and a loose-box. On one
+side of the stable was a saloon and on the other a carpenter shop, so I
+didn't expect much complaint from my neighbors, as my men patronized
+one, while I ordered the carpenter to build a traveling cage for Wallace
+which would slide on wheels, as our English cages were too heavy to
+handle in a country where labor is as high as it is here. I moved the
+lions up to the stable to let them rest a bit after the voyage and
+started to look for an engagement. It was a hard row to hoe, as I was
+not known in this country, and the best I could do was a booking at a
+dime museum for a month, and I had to take a lowish price at that, but
+I ordered a big nine sheet poster and trusted to luck to make more out
+of them later.
+
+"The lions were in three cages in the stable, and in one of the stalls I
+had a trotting horse which had been purchased for my brother in England,
+and which I kept there until I should have an opportunity to ship it to
+the other side. The kangaroos were in the loft, and a couple of days
+after they were all settled my two little girls came over from the hotel
+with me one morning and went up there with the nurse to play with them
+while I went into the carpenter shop next door to settle for the new
+cage, which had just been delivered. Broncho, as soon as he struck his
+native soil, had discovered a camp of other Indians on the Bowery and
+spent most of his time in their encampment, leaving a Cockney Englishman
+in charge of the lions and the horse. I intended to wait until he
+arrived before shifting Wallace to the new cage, but the Englishman
+thought he would show his cleverness and attempted to do it alone
+without waiting for us. He threw a piece of meat into the new cage and
+then rolled it up to the old one, and when the doors were opposite each
+other he opened them. Of course Wallace made a spring for the meat in
+the new cage, but he struck the edge of the door, and as the Cockney had
+neglected to block the wheels the cage rolled away and the keeper gave a
+yell and bolted for the stairs. There was a loose lion downstairs--and a
+bad one at that--and the nurse and two children in the loft.
+
+"The first I knew of it was from the nurse, who had grabbed the children
+and stood with them in the door which had been used to pass the hay in,
+yelling 'Fire!' and 'Murder!' but I knew that there was hell to pay as
+soon as I reached the street, by the sound which came from the stable.
+We got a ladder from the carpenter shop and hustled the nurse and
+children down to the street, and then I went up to the loft, while the
+nurse and the Cockney held the small door from the stable to the street,
+which could not be fastened from the outside until the carpenter spiked
+some plank over it.
+
+"A look into the stable convinced me that I did not want to go down the
+stairs, for with one blow Wallace had converted a thousand-dollar
+trotting horse into two dollars' worth of lion meat, and he was crouched
+on the body, which he had dragged from the stall, clawing at its throat
+and drinking the blood. The place looked like a shambles, and the growls
+which came from Wallace as the other lions threw themselves against the
+bars of their cages in their efforts to get out and join in the feast
+were redoubled when he caught sight of my head through the trap-door. I
+slammed it down and drew the kangaroo cage on top of it and then went
+down to the street to see that the windows and doors were securely
+boarded up. A great crowd was gathering and I was afraid that the police
+would shoot the brute, for I saw the possibilities of an advertisement
+which would more than pay for the expensive meal which Wallace was
+making from the trotting horse.
+
+[Illustration: _"His vanity got the better of him when he turned his
+back on the lion, to bow to the audience."_]
+
+"Just as I reached the street, Broncho strolled up. As I said, he was a
+queer-looking guy; his skin was copper-colored and he had piercing black
+eyes and long, fuzzy black hair which fell down to his shoulders. His
+nose was hooked and something about his face always reminded me of a
+bird of prey. He was only a half-breed, but when I told him what had
+occurred he was all Indian and he drew a long knife and started for the
+Cockney, who gave only one look at the expression on Broncho's face and
+then started for Harlem, touching only the high spots until he was quite
+out of sight. Broncho didn't chase him; he just looked after him with a
+smile on his face, glad to see him disappear, as there had been more or
+less bad blood between them for a long time. Then he came to me and
+laughed at the idea of danger and offered to go into the stable and put
+Wallace back in the cage. I knew that it would be impossible until the
+lion had gorged himself on horse meat, and now that the damage was done
+I was in no hurry to allay the excitement until the police and reporters
+arrived. We didn't have to wait long, for the crowd had grown until the
+street was blocked, and, of course, the reporters asked more than a
+thousand questions. When I had worked the sensation up pretty well I
+consented to let Broncho take his training rod and go down, and I went
+with him carrying a club and a pitchfork. Things commenced to happen
+right away, for Wallace didn't wait for the call of time, but sailed
+right into us, and when I saw that he was getting the better of Broncho
+I made a bluff at going back to the carcass of the horse. Wallace
+bounded back to protect it and crouched on it, snarling viciously, but
+the delay gave me a chance to help Broncho up the stairway. There was
+not enough of his trousers left to wad a gun, and while I was bandaging
+up a deep claw wound in his thigh that advertisement seemed less and
+less important to me, and I would have given a good deal to have Wallace
+safely behind the bars of his cage again. He was contracted for four
+weeks anyway, and it takes a pretty big sensation to be remembered for
+more than thirty days in New York.
+
+"Well, we fussed about all day, trying to figure out some way to get the
+beggar back in his cage, and I got an earache listening to advice from
+people who had never seen a lion, but who considered themselves experts.
+At sunset Wallace still held the fort and the streets were blocked in
+all directions, for the afternoon papers were out with extras with
+scare-heads. The boards over the windows made the interior of the stable
+so dark that no one could see into it, but the roars which came from it
+gave the spectators all the thrills they were entitled to and caused a
+stampede every few minutes. We tried to drive Wallace into the cage
+with a stream of water from the fire plug, but he only shook his head
+and growled at it, so we gave it up and waited for daylight. There were
+about forty policemen and a crowd of reporters about the place all
+night, and I was getting nervous for fear some fool would shoot the
+lion, whose value was increasing every minute, so I kept awake and did
+a heap of thinking.
+
+[Illustration: _"Broncho was only a half-breed."_]
+
+"I knew that Wallace would fight for his 'kill' as long as any of the
+meat was left, so we rigged up a tackle to try and draw the carcass out.
+We were all ready at daylight and the crowd was bigger than ever. Say,
+if you want to count the idle people in New York just get up a free show
+at any hour of the day or night and they will all come. There must have
+been over a thousand loafing about the street all night. We were just
+getting ready to make a try for the horse when the idlers outside gave a
+cheer, and I saw an express wagon loaded with nets and ropes and all
+sorts of animal catching stuff drive up. Tody Hamilton, Barnum's press
+agent, had caught on to the possibilities of an advertisement, and sent
+to the winter quarters at Bridgeport for some of their animal men to
+come down and capture a loose lion. They supposed it was in Central
+Park, and when they found it was in a stable the job looked easy to
+them. One of them, a man named McDonald, had been with our English
+show, and when he heard that it was Wallace they were to tackle his
+enthusiasm seemed to melt. He told the others a few anecdotes of the
+lion, and two of them went to find the Cockney, I guess, for we never
+saw them again.
+
+"We managed to throw a slip noose around the carcass from the stairs,
+and when we passed the end of the rope out of the window there must have
+been five hundred men pulling on it from the way that horse's body slid
+across the floor. The four of us stood around the trap-door to beat
+Wallace back, and when he realized that he was losing his prey it kept
+us busy.
+
+"Say, a dead horse seems to have more legs than a centipede when you try
+to drag it through a narrow space, and they all stick out in different
+directions. Of course, this one stuck and then there was more trouble,
+for when I took an axe to dismember it, a cop threatened to arrest me
+for cutting up a horse in the city limits. It took three hours to
+satisfy the red-tape requirements and get a permit from the Board of
+Health, and then I had a long, sickening job, for we had to haul up
+what was left of the poor beast in fragments, and all the time Wallace
+was snapping at them or rushing at us. We gave him several nasty cracks
+over the snout, the only place where a lion seems to be sensitive to
+pain, but it only made him uglier than ever and I knew that there was a
+pretty fight ahead of us. It was a case of 'Perdicaris alive or Raisouli
+dead' with me, for the police were getting impatient, and I knew they
+would shoot him if we did not get him caged before night.
+
+"We drew lots to see who should be the first to go down, and I think
+that McDonald stacked the straws, for Broncho won--or lost--I was
+second, the other Barnum man third and McDonald last; but he made good
+after we got down there, and it was what the President would have called
+a 'crowded hour.' If Wallace hadn't been full of horse meat, which made
+him a trifle slow, I think he would have chased the bunch of us out, and
+as it was he gave us all we wanted to do. We used blank cartridges,
+Roman candles, training rods and whips, and I learned afterward that
+the crowd outside thought we were all being torn to pieces, but we
+finally conquered and it was a singed and battered lion which jumped
+back into the den and gave me a chance to slam the door. The noise of
+the clicking lock sounded good to me, and I went up the stairs with a
+lighter heart, in spite of tattered clothes and a scratched hand and
+bruised body. I knew that I had a small fortune in the beast, but I
+nearly cried when I went into the saloon to freshen up, and the first
+thing I saw was the poster with the announcement that Wallace would be
+shown at the dime museum. I knew that it would make the reporters, who
+had been writing columns of space, suspect that it was all a fake and
+prearranged. The manager was afraid that I would renege on my contract
+after all the free advertising, but he didn't know me.
+
+[Illustration: _"We didn't have any regular snake charmer, but Merritt
+made himself up for a Hindoo fakir."_]
+
+"Sure enough, the reporters came for me in a body while I was still
+tired and dirty from the fight and worn out with anxiety and loss of
+sleep. They accused me of having put up a job on them, but I guess the
+sight of my condition convinced them of my sincerity, for only one paper
+even hinted at any crookedness, and that proved the best advertisement
+in the whole business.
+
+"It was the _Sun_ which came out in an article about Wallace, saying
+that he was toothless and decrepit from old age, and that there had
+never been the slightest danger from him. If the reporter who wrote it
+had gone into the stable with us, I don't think he would have written
+the article. I did my own announcing in those days and I always started
+off with the announcement, 'Ladies and gentlemen! If you see it in the
+_Sun_, it's so, and the _Sun_ says that Wallace is played out and
+toothless from old age.' Then I would make a move to the front of the
+cage, and Wallace, who had a special hatred for me, would spring at the
+bars and show as pretty a set of fangs as you would wish to see and I
+was always sure of a laugh.
+
+"Well, I showed Wallace in New York and other cities for thirty straight
+weeks and got back the value of that trotter a good many times over,"
+continued the Proprietor as he rose from the table. "His name is one to
+conjure with, even yet, and nearly every lion which is exhibited in the
+side shows at the county fairs is billed as 'Wallace, the Untamable!'
+The original Wallace is still alive and at our English breeding
+establishment." He said good-night and left the table, the Press Agent
+looking regretfully after him.
+
+"That's just like the boss," he complained as he watched the retreating
+figure. "He takes the center of the stage until he has told his story,
+and when my turn comes to get in the limelight he does the disappearing
+act. That was a pretty good story, but talking of escapes, I can tell
+you about an escape that is worth talking about. It happened when a guy
+named Merritt and myself were running a snake show next to a camp
+meeting down on the Jersey coast. We didn't have any regular snake
+charmer, but we bought a lot of wrigglers from a dealer down on the
+Bowery and Merritt made himself up for a Hindoo fakir. He would get into
+the cage with them and those snakes would wrap themselves about him from
+his head to his toes and it was an awe-inspiring sight. He taught them
+to stand up on their tails and dance while he played on a tin whistle
+and to do other pretty little tricks, but the great and original stunt
+was what he called the 'Interminable Snake,' when one would grab the
+biggest snake's tail in his mouth, another would fasten onto him, and so
+on until the whole blame lot looked like one big serpent. Say, those
+snakes got so stuck on that game that they would do it for sport without
+the word of command. Whenever one started to move around the cage
+another would grab his tail, and the first thing you knew the whole
+bunch was going around in a string and the sight of it was enough to
+make a man swear off for a year.
+
+"We were doing a fine business until a temperance lecturer set up a show
+a little way off, and that cut into us so that there was nothing much
+doing. The crowd would walk right past the entrance to our 'Highly Moral
+and Instructive Exhibition,' and go on to listen to the temperance guy
+telling them about the evils of drink, as illustrated by the horrible
+living examples which he had upon the platform. You see that was a free
+show, while ours cost a quarter--and cheap at the price.
+
+"One afternoon after I had cracked my voice trying to draw the crowd
+without landing one of 'em, Merritt comes to me, and as we saw the crowd
+pouring in to the temperance show, we looked at each other and shook
+our heads in sorrow.
+
+"'Jim,' says Merritt, 'that guy down there has got you skinned to death
+on the ballyhoo, and it's up to you to go over there and get next to the
+attraction and see if we can't cop it out for our show. I hate to ask it
+of you,' says he, 'knowing your views on the temperance question, but
+business is business and this ain't no time for sentiment.' It went
+against the grain, but I knew it must be done, so I went down to the
+lecture. I wasn't wise to the game, but I was anxious not to miss a
+trick, so I went right up to the front, and the first thing I knew I was
+seated on the mourners' bench, right under the platform. As soon as the
+lecturer came on I piped him for a guy that used to pull teeth on the
+Bowery with a brass band accompaniment and a gasoline torch, and I
+remembered that at that time he could punish more booze than any man I
+ever knew. He had the gift of gab all right, and he had picked up a
+couple of panhandlers for horrible examples and they looked the part.
+If either one of them had ever drawn a sober breath in twenty years he
+should have sued his face for libel, and they looked as if they had been
+towed behind a trolley car from the Battery to Fort George.
+
+"Well, the ex-jaw carpenter cut loose in good form, and he soon had
+every one worked up, telling the horrible things which alcohol did to
+your interior lining, and giving a description of the menagerie which a
+man sees when he has the jim-jams, which would have done credit to the
+boss lecturer in there." He pointed with his thumb to the Arena, and the
+alert waiter, taking it for a signal, refilled the glasses.
+
+"He did it so well that he sort of had me going, and I was beginning to
+think that possibly I was taking a trifle too much," continued the Press
+Agent, as he sampled the fresh drink. "I was giving the matter serious
+thought, when my attention was attracted by one of the panhandlers who
+was nudging his partner.
+
+"'Bill,' says he, 'tell the old man to put on full steam ahead, for I'm
+backsliding and need encouragement. I'm afraid I've got 'em again. Look
+there!' Bill looks down the aisle and gets uneasy, too.
+
+"'Hank,' says he, 'I've got 'em, likewise, only that ain't my usual kind
+of snake, coz he ain't got no plug hat with a red flannel band on it;
+but it's me for the bromide and the simple life.'
+
+"'It's this damn Jersey whiskey that's changed 'em,' answers Bill. 'Mine
+always has gorillas ridin' 'em.' Well, I looked around and I would have
+been scared myself if I hadn't recognized our own bunch of snakes, each
+one of 'em with the tail of the snake in front of him in his mouth. Old
+'Limber Larry'--we called him that on account of his habit of going to
+sleep curled up in a true lover's knot--was in the lead, and behind him
+came about half a mile of snakes.
+
+"They were festooning themselves up the aisle, coming slow, because
+there were a couple of them which could not move very fast, and when the
+gait got too lively they used to bite their leaders' tails. Old Larry
+was raising his head and looking around every few feet, and just when
+the lecturer had reached the most thrilling part of his 'Ten Nights in a
+Barroom' spiel he caught Larry's eye and the meeting adjourned, _sine
+die_, right there. You couldn't see him for dust as he broke for the
+nearest 'speakeasy,' and the two panhandlers were hanging on to his coat
+tails.
+
+"Just then Merritt comes in looking worried, for he had gone to sleep
+and let 'em get away from him, but when he sees 'em he takes his tin
+whistle out of his pocket and goes back to the show, tooting it like a
+blasted Pied Piper, the snakes following along as meek as Mary's little
+lamb, and most of the audience goes with him at a quarter per."
+
+"Did business improve?" asked the Stranger.
+
+"Improve? Why, my boy, after we put that temperance show out of business
+we just turned 'em away for three months. Not only did we do a good
+business, but the hotel people put us on the free list at the bar,
+because Merritt used to take 'em down in 'Interminable Snake' formation
+for a dip in the ocean every morning, and the hotel press agent wrote it
+up as the daily appearance of the gigantic sea serpent."
+
+
+
+
+KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT
+
+
+
+
+KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT
+
+
+A delegation from the National Association of Press Agents which was
+holding its annual meeting in the interests of the Furtherance of Truth
+and the Elevation of the Show Business had left the meeting place in New
+York, and after inspecting the various moral and entertaining
+performances at Coney Island was gathered about one of the white-topped
+tables near the Dreamland tower. Colonel Tody Hamilton, prince of press
+agents, master of a picturesque vocabulary, inventor of superlatives in
+the English language and champion of veracity, pointed laughingly toward
+the Arena, where the Proprietor of the trained animal exhibition was
+instructing a new barker how to make the most out of a trick of one of
+the elephants which was being used for ballyhoo purposes in front of
+the entrance to his show.
+
+"Listen to him, gentlemen, and you will be convinced that he is eligible
+to membership in our truth-loving fraternity," he remarked admiringly.
+The ungainly pachyderm was standing on its hind legs, trumpeting through
+its upraised trunk a protest against the prodding of the sharp goad
+which was forcing it to walk backward in that absurd position. The voice
+of the Proprietor, who was using a megaphone, came to them distinctly as
+he invited the people to look at "One of the greatest triumphs of the
+animal trainer's art; something which has never been exhibited in any
+country--an elephant WALKING UPON ITS HIND LEGS, BACKWARD!"
+
+The speech caught and held the attention of the crowd, and when the
+elephant was allowed to rejoin its companions and the three great beasts
+entered the building in single file, Tom grasping Roger's tail in his
+trunk and Alice following suit with the caudal appendage of Tom, a
+goodly number stepped up to the ticket booth and paid their entrance
+money. The Colonel and his associates, whose business had made them
+familiar with elephants, smiled at the credulity of the crowd, but
+acknowledged the Proprietor's skill in attracting an audience.
+
+[Illustration: _"Sam Watson confessed the whole thing."_]
+
+"You wouldn't believe that I spent over seven hundred dollars to turn
+that smallest elephant white a few years ago," said the Colonel as the
+waiter refilled their glasses, but his companions made unanimous
+protestation that they would believe any statement he made, and the
+Colonel settled back comfortably in his chair to tell the story which
+they demanded.
+
+"You will have to listen to the story of the famous war of the white
+elephants, then," he said, good-naturedly, "a struggle which will remain
+famous in the circus world as long as the big tops are spread. It was in
+the good old days of fierce competition in the business, the days when
+the press agents earned every dollar of their salaries, and sometimes
+had to go to the extent of saying things in print which were not
+strictly true. There was intense rivalry between the two big shows, the
+P. T. Barnum and the Forepaugh aggregations, and the bitter feeling
+between the proprietors was transmitted to the employees. The advance
+agents would steal each other's printed matter and posters out of the
+express offices, and you could always count on a fight between the
+canvas men whenever the two shows were close enough together. They
+would damage each other's property, loosen nuts on the wagons so that
+the wheels would come off and cause upsets, and do anything to embarrass
+the rival show.
+
+"Each show tried to outdo the other at every point; advertising, number
+of performers, length of the street parade, menagerie collection and
+everything which money could buy. They started in to see which could get
+the largest herd of elephants, each advertising the largest herd in
+captivity, and that competition raised the price of elephants all over
+the world and denuded every small zoological park in Europe, while it
+pretty nearly bankrupted the shows to feed them. We had eighty with the
+Barnum circus, and finally Mr. Barnum came to me and said that he had
+purchased a Sacred White Elephant and told me to start giving it
+publicity. Of course, I didn't know anything about that particular kind
+of elephant, but as I always like to be perfectly accurate in my
+statements I made a scientific study of it. I found that, as a matter
+of fact, there was no such thing as a white elephant known in natural
+history, although there was an occasional absence of the usual pigment
+in the skins of some beasts which give them a trifle lighter color, and
+that these animals were apt to have a few spots on the body which were
+nearly white, just as you sometimes hear of a negro who is spotted. When
+such a spot occurs in the center of the forehead the Buddhists regard
+the beast as sacred, from the fact that the god, Buddha, is always
+depicted as wearing a jewel in that position and it is looked upon as
+his special mark of protection. It is the ambition of every Indian Rajah
+to possess one, for then he is billed as 'The Lord of the Sacred White
+Elephant,' a title which seems to fill a long-felt want in the heart of
+an Oriental potentate.
+
+"Well, Barnum's agent had, by some hook or crook, procured one of these
+and sent it to London, but owing to the lateness of the season it was
+decided to leave it there in the Zoological Gardens and get up a
+controversy which, in itself, would be a good advertisement for it. The
+average Englishman is very fond of writing to the _Times_ to expose a
+fraud, and we knew that there would be a protest from those who would be
+disappointed in the brute's color. There are hundreds of retired
+officers who have served in India living in London, and they know all
+about Sacred White Elephants, and time hangs heavily on their hands.
+They were only too anxious to certify to its genuineness, and they wrote
+the peppery kind of replies to the criticisms which might be expected
+from men who had spent the best years of their lives under a hot sun and
+lived upon curries and red peppers. Of course, I saw that the letters
+were copied in the home papers, and before the circus season opened I
+had the Great American Public watching anxiously for the reported
+sailing of the Sacred White Elephant.
+
+[Illustration: _"Walking upon its hind legs, BACKWARD."_]
+
+"I should have been on my guard, for the Forepaugh bunch just kept
+sawing wood and saying nothing, but whenever I met their press agent he
+gave me the quiet laugh. Our elephant was finally shipped, and you can
+imagine that I made the most of it in the papers. I had 'em filled up
+for two days, and then, while ours was still in mid-ocean, out comes
+Forepaugh's announcement that his Sacred White Elephant would land in
+New York the following day. I knew it was a fake, for they were very
+difficult to obtain, but they stole our thunder, just the same. I
+managed to get a peep at it while it was being unloaded, and although it
+was only a dirty yellowish color, I knew that it would make ours look
+like a decided brunette by comparison. They had worked it well and kept
+it quiet, but knowing that there was a nigger in the woodpile and that
+money would bring him out, I spent it like a drunken sailor in trying to
+get information.
+
+"Forepaugh had eminent scientists examine the beast and give their
+certificates that it was genuine, and all the inside information I could
+get was that the elephant had been purchased through Cross, the great
+animal dealer in Liverpool, and that it had been kept secluded in his
+place there all winter. Sam Watson, who was Forepaugh's foreign agent,
+and his groom, a man named Telford, were the only people who had access
+to it, and they had spent hours every day in its stall. Cross would give
+us no information as to how or where he obtained the elephant, for
+Forepaugh bought all of the animals for his menagerie through him,
+while we dealt with his great rival, Hagenbeck, of Hamburg.
+
+"Forepaugh got all the newspaper space for the next few days, and when
+our elephant finally arrived it looked mighty dark-colored for a white
+elephant when compared with the fake one. It was hard to educate the
+people up to the significance of the little white spot in the center of
+the forehead, but any one but a blind man could see that Forepaugh's
+fake was lighter in color. We went at it, horse, foot and artillery, and
+the fight cost the two shows more than a quarter of a million dollars,
+and lasted until we patched up a truce in St. Louis to save us both
+going into bankruptcy. I got some of Cross's employees to swear that
+they had seen the elephant being painted in Liverpool, and Forepaugh
+replied by getting a commission of scientific sharps from Ann Arbor to
+examine the beast and swear that the color was natural. There was good
+money in perjury and scientific opinions those days, but I never let up
+for a minute in my endeavor to get at the truth of the matter, for I
+knew it was hanky panky and I am a diligent searcher after truth,
+especially when a rival has sunk it to the bottom of a well. I
+experimented with some of our elephants until I nearly took their thick
+hides off, but I could get no satisfactory results until I called in
+Marchand, the chemist, and asked him if he could give me something to
+bleach an elephant. He had an especially strong solution of peroxide of
+hydrogen made up, and I selected the smallest animal out of our herd of
+eighty to try it on. It happened to be the one which you just saw
+working on the ballyhoo over there, which you noticed was the ordinary
+slate color. We soaked cloths in the peroxide and covered the beast with
+them and then put blankets on top. After they had been on for awhile we
+washed the animal with ammonia and water and repeated the performance
+until that elephant was as white as snow.
+
+[Illustration: _"Forepaugh had eminent scientists examine the beast."_]
+
+"Forepaugh was to open in Philadelphia, so I shipped our fake over
+there, and when they had their street parade I followed right behind it
+with our bleached animal on a truck which was liberally placarded. The
+notices called attention to the fact that Forepaugh's alleged sacred
+elephant was simply painted and that the men who did it were bunglers at
+the business. 'LOOK AT THIS ONE!' read our largest placard. 'WE TELL
+YOU THAT IT IS A FAKE! So is Forepaugh's, but he won't tell! This is A
+BETTER JOB BY A BETTER ARTIST!' That made the Forepaugh people hot, and
+they replied with a new bunch of affidavits and expert opinions from a
+lot of University of Pennsylvania professors. That couldn't offset our
+show-up, though, and the whole situation had become so mixed that the
+public thought all of the elephants were fakes. We had the only genuine
+one and the best fake also, but they were a pair of white elephants in
+every sense of the term, and a losing proposition. The one which we had
+bleached would only keep white for about two weeks, and as each
+treatment cost seven hundred dollars Barnum called me off. The Forepaugh
+bunch was trying to poison it, and as the whole thing was dead as a
+money-making venture and white elephants a drug in the market, we let
+this one regain its natural color. When the great herd was broken up it
+was sold off, and I never saw it again until to-night."
+
+"But what was the inside history of the Forepaugh white elephant?" asked
+one of his companions, and the Colonel smiled as he lighted a fresh
+cigar.
+
+"I never knew it until this year, when one night over a friendly drink
+Sam Watson, who is now a clown with the Big Show, confessed the whole
+thing. Forepaugh is dead and the shows have been consolidated, so there
+is no further object in keeping the thing quiet. It seems that
+Forepaugh's agents found out that Barnum had purchased the elephant from
+an impecunious Indian Rajah; in fact, he had purchased two, the first
+one having died on its way to England. It was the misdirection of a
+cable announcing the death and ordering another at any cost which put
+them wise to the fact that Barnum had a rarity. Watson had never heard
+of a sacred elephant, but he started out to get one when he read that
+cablegram. They were scarce articles, and Barnum had bought the only two
+which were to be had for love or money in all India, so he and Cross got
+their heads together and started out to manufacture a bogus one in
+Liverpool.
+
+"They prepared a closed stall, which was always kept locked, and put an
+elephant in it--just a common, or garden, elephant. Then Sam and his
+groom, Telford, proceeded to get busy with bath bricks, pumice stone
+and a barrel of white aniline dye. I imagine they had a pretty hard
+winter's work and it was certainly a tough period for the elephant,
+because they had to scrape about half the skin off the poor brute before
+the dye would take hold. They finally succeeded in getting him several
+shades lighter than normal, all except about eighteen inches at the end
+of the trunk. They could do nothing with that on account of the habit of
+the beast, which was always mussing around in its bedding, searching for
+stray peanuts.
+
+[Illustration: _"Then Sam and his groom, Telford, proceeded to get
+busy."_]
+
+"They kept in touch with the London Zoo and found out when we were to
+ship the genuine one, and then got their fake on a steamer which would
+land it in New York a few days ahead of us. Of course, they had to keep
+working at it all the way over, but they kept it quiet and no one caught
+on. When the scientific sharps came to examine it, Sam would hoist the
+trunk up in the air while he drew their attention to the marvelous
+whiteness of the under side, and no one caught on to the fact that the
+end of the trunk was the natural color.
+
+"He let them remove some bits of skin for microscopic examination to
+prove that no dye was used, but he always had them taken from the inner
+side of the foreleg near the body, from which the natural pigment is
+absent in all elephants. Sam swears that they never had to fix one of
+the experts; they were only too anxious to get the advertisement, and
+they were prepared to swear, and did in this particular case, that black
+was white.
+
+"I have a few gray hairs in my head, and most of them came during the
+strain of that fight. The game isn't what it used to be and I'm glad
+that it isn't, and let me tell you, as a result of long experience, that
+the worst thing which can happen to a man is to have a white elephant,
+fake or genuine, on his hands."
+
+
+
+
+THE HYPNOTIC BEAR AND THE SENTIMENTAL LECTURER
+
+
+
+
+THE HYPNOTIC BEAR AND THE SENTIMENTAL LECTURER
+
+
+The doctor shook his head as he slipped his ophthalmoscope into his
+pocket, and Rey, the trainer, who had been holding the bear's head still
+while the oculist made the examination, opened the door of the cage for
+him. The bear--a medium-sized black animal--wandered aimlessly about,
+stumbling over the water pan and knocking its head against the bars, its
+eyes, which were evidently sightless, shining like two fiery opals as
+they reflected the electric light.
+
+"I am sorry to tell you that it is a hopeless case," said the physician
+to the Proprietor, who was standing with the Stranger in front of the
+cage watching the examination. "Both optic nerves are atrophied, and
+the animal must have received some serious injury, possibly a heavy
+blow on the forehead." The Proprietor, who has the reputation of being a
+"good loser," thanked him and gave some directions to the trainer about
+the care of the animal before leading the way to the table in front of
+the Arena, where the Press Agent was waiting for them.
+
+"It is rather unusual to call the most famous specialist in the country
+to examine a menagerie animal," he said, after the doctor hurriedly left
+them to catch the express train back to the city. "You know that he
+takes no small fee; his services are either given for charity or his
+charge is very high--and this visit was not for charity."
+
+"I should think that the value of a bear would hardly warrant the
+expense," answered the Stranger as the waiter filled the glasses.
+
+"It wouldn't be for an ordinary bear, but I was willing to pay anything
+in reason to restore the sight of this particular specimen, so I sent
+for the best-known oculist in New York. The decision which he has just
+given will probably mean a loss of thousands of dollars to me, but that
+is one of the risks which I have to assume. Would it interest you to
+hear a rather unusual romance of the menagerie business?" The Stranger
+gave eager assent, and the Press Agent settled himself comfortably and
+lighted a cigar.
+
+[Illustration: _"There seems to be a sympathy between them."_]
+
+"You have no idea how many animals are offered to the owner of a
+menagerie and from what unusual sources the offers come," said the
+Proprietor. "Travelers in far countries bring back strange animals as
+pets or curiosities; people buy young wild animals which get beyond
+control when they mature and become veritable white elephants on their
+hands, and their owners have to dispose of them. I have had everything
+from monkeys to lions brought to me, and so it did not surprise me when
+an artist came to the Hippodrome in Paris last winter and asked me if I
+didn't want to purchase a bear. He seemed anxious for me to see it
+immediately, and at his earnest solicitation I got in a cab with him and
+drove to his studio, which was situated on the far side of the Seine.
+The bear which you saw examined to-night was in a small room adjoining
+the studio, chained to a ring in the wall.
+
+"The apartment was luxuriously furnished, and I realized that it was not
+lack of ready money which made the artist so anxious to dispose of the
+brute; but he seemed in a desperate hurry to have me take it away, and
+offered it for such a low price that I closed the bargain at once. I
+suggested sending one of my men for it in the evening, but he insisted
+upon my taking it with me, and as the bear was evidently as gentle as a
+kitten I called a closed cab and drove away with it. The bear sat
+comfortably on the seat beside me and gave no trouble, but as we drove
+along I got to thinking the matter over and the whole proceeding seemed
+a little strange. I had Mephisto, as the bear was named, put in a cage
+well away from the other animals--a sort of quarantine precaution which
+I always take with new arrivals--and as there was apparently nothing
+unusual about him gave him little attention, there being for the moment
+no group of animals in training for which he would be available. I soon
+noticed that during the intermissions, when the audience wandered about
+and examined the animals in the cages, there was always a crowd of women
+about his den; but I thought that it was because he was such an
+inveterate beggar, and had a habit of standing at the bars with his
+mouth wide open, waiting for some one to flick a lump of sugar into it.
+
+"The bear had given us no trouble, and there was only one peculiar thing
+about him: he seemed to have an aversion to cats. The bodies of three of
+them had been found in front of his cage, although we had never seen one
+killed. The cats about a menagerie instinctively keep out of harm's way,
+and it puzzled me to know how Mephisto had managed to get them within
+reach of his heavy paw. Jack Bonavita, who fusses about his lions at all
+hours of the day and night, solved that mystery and incidentally saved
+his pet cat, Tramp, from an untimely ending. Tramp has been with Jack
+for years and appreciates the folly of venturing within reach of the
+animals in the cages, but Bonavita came across him in front of
+Mephisto's cage in the middle of the night. The bear was absolutely
+quiet, lying with its head on its paws and its eyes, which glistened
+like two points of flame, fixed on the cat. Tramp was staring at it in
+turn and slowly drawing nearer to the cage, apparently struggling
+against some influence which was stronger than its will. Bonavita
+watched them for a few minutes, but before the cat ventured within
+striking distance he picked it up and carried it away, while Mephisto,
+growling with rage, tried to break through the stout bars and get at it.
+
+[Illustration: _"Tramp was slowly drawing nearer to the cage."_]
+
+"Two days before we were to sail for America I was sitting at my desk
+arranging some of the last details of shipment, when the door burst open
+and a well-dressed, handsome woman rushed in, followed by the artist who
+had sold me the bear. She was in a tearing rage and jabbering excitedly
+in a language which I did not understand, while the artist was trying to
+quiet her. She pushed him aside, and opening a purse which was well
+stuffed with banknotes, she asked in French, which she spoke with a
+marked foreign accent, for how much I would sell Mephisto. The artist
+protested, but she turned on him and gave him a tongue lashing of which
+I could guess the meaning, although the words were unintelligible to me.
+I couldn't quite grasp the situation, but the strange hypnotic power
+which the bear apparently exercised over cats had excited my curiosity,
+and I wished to investigate it at my leisure, so I politely but
+positively refused to name a price, and told her the animal was not for
+sale. The artist seemed relieved and she was very much disappointed, but
+she quieted down and asked me what I intended to do with the animal. I
+told her that I was taking it to America, where it would be put in a
+mixed group which Rey was to train, and after inquiring when we were to
+sail, they left the office.
+
+"I regretted that I had not taken the opportunity to find out something
+about the history of the animal, and looked over the audience to try to
+locate the couple, but they had left the building. One of the keepers
+told me that she had screamed when she recognized the bear and called it
+by name. She was trying to bribe him to let her go into the cage when
+the artist came up and expostulated with her, and they had an awful row
+before coming to my office. I heard nothing more from them and we
+shipped the animals at Havre the following day. The traveling dens were
+placed in the 'tween decks, which is not a pleasant place to be when the
+ship is tossing about, and I was surprised the second day out to find
+the woman who had tried to purchase Mephisto standing in front of his
+cage in that smelly place, talking to the bear as if it were a child.
+She laughed when I came up to her, and told me that as I would not part
+with the bear I would have to take her with the show. I, too, laughed,
+for I have a large family of daughters, and I knew that the simple
+traveling gown which she wore had cost more than two months' salary of
+my best trainer, but to my great surprise she was in dead earnest, and
+asked me seriously if I would not let her train a group of animals."
+
+The Press Agent grew very attentive, but the Proprietor told him that he
+was not talking for publication, and that a name which occupied several
+pages of the Almanach de Gotha was sacred, even from an American
+promoter of publicity.
+
+"And she does carry that name and was born to it," he continued, "but I
+can't tell you what it is. She didn't tell it to me and it was not on
+the passenger list, but the ambassador from a great European nation came
+on from Washington to see her and remonstrate with her and to influence
+me to exclude her from the show. I wouldn't consent to that, but I am
+afraid that the accident of the bear's going blind will be the cause of
+my losing an act which promised to be sensational."
+
+[Illustration: _"The bear sat comfortably on the seat beside me."_]
+
+"You have kept it quiet enough," said the Press Agent with a trace of
+resentment in his voice. "It sounds to me as if it ought to be good for
+a front-page column in every New York paper."
+
+"As I told you, there are reasons why I can't exploit it," answered the
+Proprietor. "I am counting upon it for my opening sensation at the Paris
+Hippodrome next winter, and I don't intend to discount it before a Coney
+Island audience. But to get back to my experience with her on the
+steamer. I found that she occupied the most expensive deck stateroom,
+and had a maid and a man servant traveling with her; so that I refused
+all of her renewed offers for the bear when I found the powerful
+fascination it had for her, and I finally consented to let her try the
+experiment of working with a group of animals. You know the class from
+which trainers are usually recruited, and you can imagine the interest
+I take in a woman who possesses an absolute fearlessness which is
+inherited from generations of ancestors who have never shown the white
+feather, in addition to education and intelligence. The only thing which
+puzzled me was her motive, and that I have not discovered yet, although
+the ambassador, who had received all sorts of communications about her
+from his own government, told me her history. It seems that she has
+always been noted for her eccentricity and her rebellion against the
+strict laws of convention which were supposed to control her life, and
+this is not the first time she has defied them. She had commissioned the
+artist--who, by the way, is one of the most celebrated men in Paris--to
+paint a portrait of her. At the same time he was painting an exhibition
+picture to be called the 'Dancing Bear,' and had purchased Mephisto for
+a model. The picture was to represent the bear dancing on its hind legs
+opposite a woman, to the music of a flageolet played by a man bear
+leader--such an exhibition as is commonly given at the country fairs
+throughout Europe. He had no difficulty in getting a male model, but he
+was in despair about the woman dancer. He tried model after model, and
+although they started in all right each one became so nervous after a
+sitting or two that they refused to continue. The bear was chained to
+the wall and they were posed safely out of reach, but each of them
+asserted that the animal was like a serpent and trying to charm them so
+that they would come close enough to be caught. They were all afraid
+that they might yield to the fascination and be seriously injured.
+Tramp, the cat, would probably have told the same story if he had been
+able to talk.
+
+"As a matter of curiosity the artist experimented with men, but the bear
+appeared indifferent to them and the men made no complaint. It only
+seemed to exercise this strange hypnotic power over women--and cats--for
+the artist found two Persian felines, which had been studio pets, dead
+beside it; simply crushed, as were those which were killed by the bear
+at the Hippodrome. He mentioned the matter during one of the sittings
+for the portrait, and the lady, being curious to see the animal, came to
+his studio--and then the trouble commenced. She developed a most
+unaccountable attachment for Mephisto, and he was as gentle as a lamb
+with her. They would sit facing each other by the hour, and the artist
+swore they talked to each other and understood each other perfectly. The
+animal never attempted to harm her, but the artist became alarmed for
+fear there should be an accident, and believing that there was something
+uncanny about the brute, he decided to get rid of it and sold it to me.
+
+"Well, I watched her with the bear on shipboard and since we landed, and
+I can't yet understand her control over it, for it does not control her
+in any way. There seems to be a sympathy between them which makes them
+absolutely understand each other, and through it she understands the
+other caged beasts. The act which I had framed for her when I found that
+she was absolutely in earnest was a dance to be given in the midst of a
+group of adult lions. The lady is absolutely fearless and approved the
+plan, but stipulated that she should select the lions.
+
+"'I have means of knowing which ones will behave and which are such
+idiots that they can't be controlled if anything goes wrong,' she
+answered when I suggested that I was a better judge of the dispositions
+of the lions. 'I don't intend to have my beauty spoiled,' she said, 'and
+I only want beasts which are intelligent. No one can trust a fool.'
+Perhaps I have fallen under her influence, which according to her
+standard should indicate intelligence, for I have given way at every
+point and her judgment has proved correct, for in rehearsing the act she
+has perfect control over the animals, three of which I considered the
+most vicious in the menagerie. I let her take them in fear and
+trembling.
+
+"For the past three days she has been anxious and uneasy about the bear
+and has insisted that it was rapidly going blind. She says that the bear
+is her teacher about things in the animal world, and that she can tell
+what it is thinking about. Its eyes look perfectly sound, and it is only
+for two days that we have noticed anything wrong with it. Mephisto knew
+its way about its old cage so well that it gave no evidence of
+blindness, and a bear is naturally clumsy in its movements, but when we
+moved it to a strange den it stumbled over everything. I experimented by
+bringing Tramp in front of its cage, but with the loss of sight the
+hypnotic power has apparently deserted it, and the cat paid no attention
+to it. Finally I called in the doctor and you heard him pronounce his
+verdict."
+
+"But where is the great loss?" asked the Stranger.
+
+"It is principally a loss in prospective profits," replied the
+Proprietor as he beckoned to the waiter. "I had the new act all planned
+out for Paris--the lady was to appear masked for her performance, but I
+knew her identity would be discovered and that it would be a tremendous
+sensation. I don't know how much of her desire to train animals is due
+to eccentricity and as a protest against the conventions which hedged
+in her former life, and how much to her strange infatuation for
+Mephisto, but since its blindness has developed she has lost interest
+and I suppose she will renege on the whole business."
+
+"How do you account for it all--her infatuation for the bear and her
+intuitive knowledge of the dispositions of the lions?" asked the
+Stranger.
+
+"I don't try to account for anything. It is one of the thousand things
+about animals and the million things about women which no mere man can
+understand," replied the Proprietor laughing. "I have simply given you
+the facts of the situation and you can draw your own conclusions, but
+the bear's blindness upsets my plans and possibly prevents a sensation
+in circles which approach royalty."
+
+"Women _are_ difficult to understand," agreed the Press Agent as the
+Proprietor paused to moisten his throat, "and a man who is in love with
+one of 'em is just about as unaccountable for his actions. I had that
+fact engraved upon the tablets of my memory when a guy named Merritt and
+myself were running a dime museum in Pittsburg. Merritt was a good,
+hard-headed business man as a rule and he made a first-class lecturer;
+but when I found that he was taking to 'dropping into poetry' and
+delivering his descriptions of the freaks in verse, I began to get leary
+about the condition of the contents of his head. The poetry was always
+extemporaneous and was pretty bad, but it amused the crowd when it
+wasn't too sentimental.
+
+"As I say, the poetry was strictly on the bum, but what it lacked in
+quality it made up in quantity and he could spiel it off by the yard.
+Whenever he got stuck for a rhyme he would blow the whistle which he
+used to call the crowd in front of the freak he was lecturing about and
+move to the next platform. That didn't happen often, but whenever we had
+a Circassian Beauty among the freaks Merritt's poetry got so sentimental
+that no one but a bride and groom could stand for it--and it had to be
+early in the honeymoon at that. He would ring in turtle doves and azure
+skies and all the wishy-washy things in natural history and mythology
+and it was positively sickening.
+
+"He sure had a soft place in his heart for Circassian Beauties, and as
+they were as common as wire tappers on Broadway under a reform
+administration he was always getting sentimental. We used to get a new
+lot of freaks each week; our agent in New York engaged 'em and sent on
+the advertising matter ahead, and when we looked over the list I could
+see Merritt's face brighten up if there happened to be one of the fuzzy
+blondes included in the bunch.
+
+"Business was good, in spite of Merritt's poetry, so that I didn't kick
+when I saw that another one was coming. It was a good assortment: a
+Legless Wonder, The Man Who Breaks Paving Stones With His Bare Fists, a
+pair of Siamese Twins, a Leopard Boy and a particularly fuzzy Circassian
+Beauty. I saw Merritt's eyes grow soft when he looked at her photograph,
+and I prayed for a large proportion of the newly wedded among the
+audience that week.
+
+[Illustration: _"He made sheep's eyes and threw a chest."_]
+
+"Well, Merritt starts in with the Stone Breaker and restrains himself
+pretty well; the only sentiment he got in was a fervent wish that 'a
+certain blonde beauty, with eyes of cerulean blue, would not break a
+heart which time would prove tender and true,' as ruthlessly as this man
+cracked rocks. He was gradually working up to the blonde, you
+understand, and he got warmer as he approached. The next one was the
+Legless Wonder, and he got a little tangled up in his comparisons when
+he sprung his poetry about him and tried to ring in the Circassian, and
+he had to blow his whistle like blazes to spare the blushes of the
+audience. The Siamese Twins gave him a good opening about 'bonds
+eternal' and the 'season vernal' and he didn't do a thing with it. The
+Leopard Boy was a cinch for him as he declaimed that
+
+    "'They say that beauty is but skin deep.
+    And as you gaze upon this freak,
+    You will, I think, agree with me,
+    That though beneath he fair may be,
+    You'd much prefer to look the same
+    As the fair being who next will claim
+    Our admiration and attention,
+    With charms too numerous to mention.'
+
+"That made the Leopard Boy mad, for you know that freaks are as proud of
+their deformities as a mother is of a new baby, and look on normal
+people as objects of pity. But Merritt blew his whistle and passed on to
+the Circassian, and he made sheep's eyes and threw a chest as his
+fingers toyed with her peroxide locks. Say, it was sickening to listen
+to, and I saw that even the Stone Breaker was showing signs of distress
+and couldn't stand much of it. He bore up pretty well at first, while
+Merritt stuck to describing the 'golden locks and eyes of blue,' but
+when he got to the 'sugar is sweet and so are you,' stage he commenced
+to get mad and moved over to the platform.
+
+"'Say, Mag,' says he, 'get down offen dat staige an' come away from de
+guy. It ain't in our contrac' dat we has ter stand for his gettin' soft
+on youse an' stringin' youse like dat. Come down, er I'll climb up an'
+break his face fer him.'
+
+"'Sure, Mike,' says the blonde, and climbs down. That made Merritt mad
+and he talks real English without any poetic frills for a minute. He
+allowed that he could lick any Stone Breaker that ever came off the
+Bowery, and when he started to prove it there was a mix-up which made
+the breaking up of 'The Society upon the Stanislaus' look like a fist
+fight between two Frenchmen. The walls were covered with curiosities
+from all over the world, and pretty soon they were flying through the
+air. Merritt yanked down an Indian war club and started for the Stone
+Breaker and somebody swatted him over the head with a mummy. The Legless
+Wonder couldn't join in, but he contributed a two-headed calf which was
+preserved in a jar of alcohol, and the Leopard Boy grabbed a bunch of
+Zulu spears and prodded every one in reach. Even the blonde was
+something of a scrapper and she mixed in with a miscellaneous assortment
+of stuffed animals and preserved specimens, to say nothing of some
+choice language which she hadn't learned in Circassia. The place was
+pretty well wrecked by the time the police arrived and separated the
+fighters.
+
+"'What's all this row about, anyway?' asks the sergeant after they had
+quieted things down.
+
+"'Dat guy was tryin' to get nex' to me wife, de Circassian Beaut','
+answers the Stone Breaker. 'He spouts bum poetry about her, an' I won't
+stand fer it, see? Leave me go an' I'll crack his nut as easy as I would
+a pavin' stone.' Merritt had lots of fight left in him and tried to
+break loose, but the Circassian's remarks wilted him and I never knew
+him to use poetry again.
+
+"'Aw, wot's de use, Mike?' says she. 'Youse can't crack a ting dat ain't
+hard, an' his sky-piece is made of mush.'"
+
+
+
+
+THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS AND THE POWER OF HYPNOTISM
+
+
+
+
+THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS AND THE POWER OF HYPNOTISM
+
+
+Chauncey Depew was at the bottom of all the trouble; not the punctured
+senator from the state of New York, but his namesake, one of the
+handsomest double-striped royal Bengal tigers ever captured. Depew was
+the central figure in the group which Miller, the trainer of tigers, had
+worked so hard to educate, and it was his rebellion which made the
+teacher's labors of years come to naught. Late in the season, after
+months spent in giving the finishing touches to their education while
+they were with a small part of the show which was exhibited near
+Cleveland, the tigers were brought to Dreamland; a group of eight
+magnificent beasts, all jungle bred and each worthy of a place in any
+menagerie. Perhaps it was the discomfort of the journey in the small
+traveling cages, possibly the change in the surroundings and the
+nearness of the other animals excited them; but whatever the cause,
+there was trouble in the narrow runway at the back of the dens when they
+entered it to go to the exhibition cage for their first Coney Island
+appearance.
+
+The sound of their snarling and growling, the reports of pistol shots
+and the cracking of training whips caused a sensation of uneasiness in
+the audience until the first tiger bounded through the door at the back
+of the cage, closely followed by a half-dozen others. Dangerous beasts
+they looked as they threw themselves against the stout bars, which
+rattled from the impact of their great bodies, and the front seats of
+the auditorium were quickly vacated by the audience. The noise in the
+runway continued, but the deep throaty growls which came from behind the
+dens were of a different quality from the snarling and yapping of the
+seven beasts in the exhibition cage, and when the last of the tigers
+appeared in the doorway the first arrivals made renewed efforts to
+escape through the bars.
+
+[Illustration: _"The first tiger bounded through the door."_]
+
+It was Depew; not the good-natured-looking great cat whose
+"I-have-eaten-the-canary" expression and smug whiskers had suggested his
+name, but a jungle tiger who had "gone bad," as the animal trainers call
+it, and who stood for a moment in the doorway, wrathfully surveying his
+frantic companions and selecting a victim. Froth was dripping from his
+snarling lips, his small eyes were blazing like two points of flame, the
+hair on his neck and back stood up like bristles, and his great tail
+struck the door-casing resounding whacks, as he lashed it from side to
+side. Only a moment he stood there, and then the great striped body
+hurtled through the air as if shot from a catapult, and covering a good
+twenty feet in the spring it landed fair on Bombay, one of the largest
+tigers in the group. The aim was a true one and the sound of breaking
+bone mingled with a scream of pain from his victim, as Bombay sank under
+the weight of the blow, his cervical vertebræ crushed between Depew's
+powerful jaws.
+
+The door had been closed behind Depew when he made his spring, and the
+other tigers were chasing madly about the great cage, looking for a
+chance to escape. There was no desire to fight left in them, but when
+they collided with each other they snapped and struck with the instinct
+of self-preservation, their sharp claws and teeth cutting gashes in the
+sleek striped coats. It was evident that all training had been
+forgotten, that fear of anything so puny as man had departed from the
+minds of the tigers, and a groan went up from the audience when the door
+was opened and quickly closed behind Miller, the trainer, who stood,
+whip and training rod in hand, in the cage with the maddened animals. He
+went about his work as quietly as if it were only an ordinary
+performance, his object being to return his pupils to their dens before
+further damage was done and to try to make them recognize that they were
+obeying him.
+
+Depew was still crouched on the body of his victim, biting at the neck
+and growling ferociously, his tail lashing from side to side. Miller
+never took his eyes from him and kept between him and the door as he
+called the others by name and tried to regain control of them. One tiger
+after another was released, glad of the opportunity to escape, as the
+door to the runway was opened at Miller's signal, until only Depew, the
+body of Bombay and the trainer occupied the cage.
+
+The other tigers had entered into a general free fight in the runway,
+but the noise of their bickering was unheeded in the excitement of the
+contest in the exhibition cage. Depew rose as Miller cracked his whip
+and approached him, and made a rush which the trainer met with his
+pronged training rod, driving it hard between the widely opened jaws
+while his whip rained blows upon the tiger's face. But he was only
+checked for a moment, and under his fiercer attack the trainer was
+forced to give ground. They were so close that the tiger could not
+spring, but he struck savagely with his great forepaws and tried again
+and again to pass the guard which Miller maintained with the training
+rod, using it as a fencer uses a foil. It was an unequal contest and the
+trainer realized that he was beaten; Depew would not be driven from the
+cage. The useless training whip was discarded and a savage rush from the
+tiger was met by a pistol shot in the face, blank cartridge, of course,
+but effective for a moment. Five more shots followed in quick succession
+and the trainer backed quickly toward the door, when his foot slipped,
+he was on his back, and Depew, quick to seize the advantage, stood over
+him.
+
+[Illustration: _"Depew was still crouched on the body of his victim."_]
+
+Every keeper connected with the show stood about the cage with the Roman
+candles, fire extinguishers, pistols and irons which are always kept in
+readiness, and any or all of them would have willingly entered to rescue
+the man, but experience has taught them that two cannot work together
+in a cage with animals. They were quick to act and a stream of water
+under heavy pressure from the fire hose struck the tiger in the side,
+exploding fireworks scorched his skin, the din of revolver shots was in
+his ears, while the wads from the cartridges stung him, but he seemed
+conscious only of the prostrate form beneath him. At last his chance had
+come; the trainer who for long months had made him do foolish things
+which were beneath the dignity of a royal tiger was in his power; the
+revolver which had so often checked him was emptied; the cruel training
+rod was powerless, for the hand which held it was pinned to the floor by
+a huge paw. Cat-like he paused to glory in his triumph, loath to give
+the _coup de grâce_ which would put his victim beyond the reach of
+suffering, and he stood there growling, the bloody slaver from his jaws
+dripping on the upturned face of the prostrate man.
+
+Animal trainers need to think quickly and to seize the slightest moment
+of hesitation or indecision on the part of their pupils if they wish to
+be long-lived, and Miller, as he fell, had thrown his useless pistol out
+of the cage and uttered the one word "Load!" There was no time for that,
+but Tudor, seeing that the trainer had one arm free, threw his own
+pistol through the bars and it slid across the floor of the cage
+straight as a die to the outstretched hand. It was a time when fractions
+of a second count and Depew's hesitation robbed him of his revenge. The
+opened jaws were within a foot of the trainer's throat when the muzzle
+of the pistol went between them, and Depew, coughing and choking, drew
+back, his throat scorched by the burning powder, his eyes momentarily
+blinded by the stream from a fire extinguisher, while Miller struggled
+to his feet.
+
+"People who see the crowds at my show think that I must coin money,"
+said the Proprietor as he joined the Press Agent and the Stranger after
+the performance. "But that accident in the Arena to-night means a loss
+of fifty thousand dollars to me."
+
+"Isn't that a high figure, even if they all die?" asked the Stranger,
+who had been doing a little mental arithmetic.
+
+"For those eight, yes, although a trained tiger is worth all sorts of
+money, but I have purchased twenty-eight in all for that group, and the
+others have been killed one by one, fighting among themselves. They
+average over a thousand apiece, for I bought only the best, and figure
+up the cost of their keep, transportation and trainer's salaries for
+three years and you will find that I am not far out. That is the
+difficulty of the show business in America, the public demands so much.
+It is a marvelous thing, when you come to think of it, to see one
+educated tiger; but if he wore evening clothes and played the fiddle it
+wouldn't impress the Americans; they would demand a full orchestra. I
+can give an act an hour long in Paris with one high school horse, but
+here they want fifty liberty horses in a bunch and only care to watch
+them for ten minutes. I realized that from Bonavita's act with the
+lions; no individual lion did very much, but the fact that there were
+twenty-seven of them in the cage drew the crowds. That's what made me
+start in with the tigers, and I intended to get a big group, but now I
+am back where I started from. I don't believe a troupe of tigers can
+ever be trained."
+
+[Illustration: _"Depew, coughing and choking, drew back."_]
+
+"Hagenbeck has them," ventured the Stranger. "They seem as tame as
+kittens with his show."
+
+"That's just the point," answered the Proprietor. "They are as tame as
+kittens: undersized brutes which have been raised in captivity and
+which go through their act like domestic cats. That isn't what the
+public wants. A sensation--the realization that every animal in the cage
+is a wild animal and that he is liable to remember it at any minute--is
+what holds attention. That is why I always use jungle animals when I can
+get them, for, although they can be as well trained, they always perform
+under protest and it makes it exciting. But the losses from fighting
+among themselves make it mighty expensive to keep up the big groups
+which the American public demands."
+
+"That's one of the things which drove me out of the show business," said
+the Press Agent as he set his empty glass on the table and signaled to
+the waiter. "A guy named Merritt and myself had a snake show in New York
+a few years ago which presented the most complete collection of reptiles
+ever gotten together, for it contained specimens of every species of
+wriggler known to herpetology and a good many that were not described in
+the books. That man Merritt was an inventive genius and had the
+California sharp, Burbank, beaten a mile when it came to inventing new
+species. When business was dull he'd take a lot of common, ordinary
+snakes into the back room and with a bottle of peroxide of hydrogen and
+an assortment of aniline dyes he would bring out albinos and spotted and
+striped snakes which made the scientists open their eyes and kept 'em
+busy inventing new Latin names.
+
+"His biggest success was 'The Great Two-horned Rhinoceros Serpent,'
+which made 'em all sit up for a month, and if I hadn't seen Merritt
+working over a common boa-constrictor with a pair of shark's teeth and a
+dish of bird lime it would have fooled me. That snake was proud of the
+horns which Merritt glued on his head, too, and he used to chase the
+other snakes around the cage and butt 'em like a giddy billy-goat. But
+in spite of all his ingenuity in originating new varieties, business was
+dropping off, for the public demanded quantity as well as quality and we
+had skinned the local snake market clean. We were sitting in the office
+one day, figuring on where we could get additions to our collection,
+when a stout, red-faced little man who had 'sea captain' written all
+over him came in and asked if we wanted any more snakes. Merritt allowed
+that we did if the snakes and the prices were right and asked where we
+could inspect them.
+
+"'Well, I've got one that I brought from Borneo and he's on a ship down
+in the harbor,' says the Captain. 'We won't argue none about the price,
+for if you'll come down and take him away you can have him for nothing.'
+That made Merritt a little suspicious and he asked the Captain if it
+were his ship.
+
+"'I reckoned it was until two days ago, when that blame snake broke
+loose,' he answered irritably. 'Since then he seems to own it and not a
+man jack of the crew will go below. I've tried to shoot him, but the
+beggar's too quick, and I want to discharge my cargo, so if you ain't
+afraid to tackle him, come on.'
+
+"'Me afraid! Me?' says Merritt throwing out a chest. 'Why, man alive,
+I'm the only living snake charmer who ever dared handle the dangerous
+Two-horned Rhinoceros Serpent, and do you think I'd weaken before a
+common Borneo python?'
+
+"'I dunno whether you will or not until I see you try,' says the
+Captain. 'I've handled a Malay crew, which is worse than serpents, and
+I've mixed it up with most of the scum that sails the seven seas, but
+this blame snake's got me bluffed all right. He's three fathom long, as
+big around as the mainmast, and made up principally of muscle and
+wickedness.'
+
+"'Just watch me. Watch me!' says Merritt. 'I'll use my wonderful
+hypnotic power and you'll see the serpent crawl into the bag at my
+command, to be easily transported to this moral and elevating show for
+exhibition as an example of the power of mind over matter.'
+
+"'All right, professor,' says the Captain. 'But if you'll take my advice
+you'll stow those shore-going togs and get into working rig before you
+tackle him.' Merritt was arrayed in all his finery, and if you'd ever
+seen him you'd know that that meant a lot, for when he was flush he
+could make Solomon in all his glory, or any other swell dresser look
+like a dirty deuce in a new deck. He had on a light suit with checks
+which were so loud they drowned the music of the orchestra, and a shirt
+which would make a summer sunset hide its head in disappointment. Patent
+leather shoes with yellow tops and a white plug hat with a black band
+around it completed his costume, except for a few specimens of yellow
+diamonds which adorned his shirt front and cuffs.
+
+"Merritt snorted contemptuously at the suggestion and we started for the
+ship. When we got on board he made a little speech before he went into
+the hold, telling the sailors about his wonderful hypnotic power and how
+he would exercise it to charm the serpent which was preventing their
+worthy Captain from reaping the rewards of his arduous toil and his
+hardihood in having braved the perils of the vasty deep. The sailors
+listened and grinned, but the Captain was getting impatient and
+suggested that Merritt get the snake first and give his spiel afterward,
+so Merritt went down the ladder with the bag over his shoulder and we
+all rubbered down the hatchway to watch the capture.
+
+[Illustration: _"Merritt was quick enough to get a strangle hold around
+the snake's neck."_]
+
+"I knew what he would try to do, for I had seen him work it before. The
+way to get one of those big snakes is to cover his head with a bag, and
+then he'll crawl in himself to get into the dark, which is a serpent's
+idea of safety. The more you prod 'em the faster they'll crawl, and that
+was the time when Merritt always made passes with his hands and muttered
+gibberish to impress the spectators. He started in according to
+programme as soon as he located the snake, which was half hidden among a
+lot of casks. The snake carried out his part and struck at the opened
+bag which Merritt held out to him, but instead of sticking his head in
+he grabbed it with his teeth, and as Merritt held on he drew him back
+among the barrels and there was a pretty fight. Merritt was quick enough
+to get a strangle hold around the snake's neck and then it kept him
+busy keeping out of his coils. The Captain hadn't lied much about the
+size of the python--it was about thirty feet long--and Merritt didn't
+have time to use any incantation, although considerable forcible
+language floated up through the hatchway. They wiped the deck with each
+other for about twenty minutes, and Merritt had been bumped against
+pretty nearly every cask in the hold before he finally succeeded in
+drawing the sack over the snake's head. Then it was easy, and in spite
+of his lack of breath the showman in Merritt asserted itself. He put the
+sack on the floor, and with one foot on the neck of it he prodded the
+snake's body with the other while he made mysterious passes with his
+hands until the tip of the tail disappeared. When the sack was securely
+tied up the python was hoisted on deck, and Merritt, his clothing torn
+and soiled with pitch and the miscellaneous oily and sticky things which
+made up the ship's cargo, climbed up after it.
+
+"'Did you see me?' he asked proudly, throwing out his chest. 'Did you
+observe the wonderful hypnotic power which overcame the prowess of the
+serpent?'
+
+"'Yes, I noticed it, along toward the finish,' answered the Captain,
+grinning skeptically as he sized up Merritt's dilapidated apparel. 'But
+say, professor, what I can't understand is why you didn't get it working
+sooner.'"
+
+
+THE END
+
+
+
+
+Transcriber's Note:
+
+    Minor typographical errors have been corrected without note. Dialect
+    spellings have been retained.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Side Show Studies, by Francis Metcalfe
+
+*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SIDE SHOW STUDIES ***
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+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Side Show Studies, by Francis Metcalfe
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Side Show Studies
+
+Author: Francis Metcalfe
+
+Illustrator: Oliver Herford
+
+Release Date: November 19, 2007 [EBook #23542]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SIDE SHOW STUDIES ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Stephen Blundell and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive/American Libraries.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+<div class="box1"><div class="box2"><h1><big>SIDE SHOW<br />
+STUDIES</big></h1>
+
+<p class="hd1">BY</p>
+<h2>FRANCIS METCALFE</h2>
+
+<p class="hd2">ILLUSTRATED WITH MANY AMUSING DRAWINGS<br />
+BY OLIVER HERFORD</p>
+
+<p class="hd3">NEW YORK<br />
+THE OUTING PUBLISHING COMPANY<br />
+1906</p></div></div>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<p class="hd4">Copyright, 1905 and 1906, by<br />
+THE OUTING PUBLISHING COMPANY</p>
+
+<p class="hd4">First impression, March, 1906</p>
+
+<p class="hd4" style="margin-top: 3em;">THE OUTING PRESS<br />
+DEPOSIT, N. Y.</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<h2>CONTENTS</h2>
+
+
+
+<div class='center'>
+<table border="0" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="0" summary="">
+<tr><td class="toc2" colspan="2"><small>PAGE</small></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">The Liberty of Franz and the Rebellion of Fuzzy Wuzzy</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_1">1</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">The Bite of a Rattler and the Sad Fate of Big Pete</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_23">23</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">The Amorous Baboon</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_45">45</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">Feeding the Serpents and a Grand Transformation</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_67">67</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">The Lioness Skirt Dance and the Inconsiderate Python</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_89">89</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">The Animal Barometer and the Eternal Feminine</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_113">113</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">Making a Star Lion and an Interrupted Temperance Meeting</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_137">137</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">Kalsomining an Elephant</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_163">163</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">The Hypnotic Bear and the Sentimental Lecturer</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_183">183</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="toc1">The Tragedy of the Tigers and the Power of Hypnotism</td><td class="toc2"><a href="#Page_211">211</a></td></tr>
+</table></div>
+
+
+<div class="trans1"><p class="trnhd">Transcriber's Note</p>
+<p>Minor typographical errors have been corrected without note. Dialect
+spellings have been retained. A list of illustrations, though not present in the original publication,
+has been provided below:</p>
+
+<p class="loi"><a href="#The_table_in_front_of_the_Arena">The table in front of the Arena.</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Two_French_clowns_and_a_performing_dog">Two French clowns and a performing dog.</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Things_which_Nature_never_intended_them_to_do">"Things which Nature never intended them to do."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_15">"Blank cartridges fired in his face."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Five_hundred_dollars_to_any_one_who_will_enter_the_cage">"Five hundred dollars to any one who will enter the cage."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#A_constant_procession_of_small_animals_moving_down_his_throat">"A constant procession of small animals moving down his throat."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_31">"The wise guy."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Noah_listens_to_the_tale_of_a_Johnstown_flood_survivor">Noah listens to the tale of a Johnstown flood survivor.</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Just_two_little_red_dots_on_the_back_of_his_hand">"Just two little red dots on the back of his hand."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_49">"He smoked his cigar in the lobby like any other guest."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Jocko_giving_a_howl_of_rage_danced_madly_up_and_down">"Jocko, giving a howl of rage, danced madly up and down."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#All_of_his_savage_instincts_were_aroused">"All of his savage instincts were aroused."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#A_Tattooed_Lady_and_shes_all_covered_with_picters">"A 'Tattooed Lady,' and she's all covered with picters."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_71">"A procession of sandwich men."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_75">"Brought the head of the cobra close to his face."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_79">"You're a blame fine figure of a fat man."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_87">"Jake was having the time of his life, and the harder the elephants pulled the tighter he squeezed the Signor."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Now_if_youll_kindly_give_me_your_attention">"Now, if you'll kindly give me your attention."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Looked_like_the_pennant_of_a_man-o-war">"Looked like the pennant of a man-o'-war."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_101">"Kicking over their heads and into their very mouths."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Grace_snarled_over_the_cubs">Grace snarled over the cubs.</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_119">"Every one of the great beasts jumped for her."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_123">"Jim," says Merritt, ... "there is a great advantage in having a squaw for the top part of that there fish."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_129">"A howl of terror from the platform."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#There_was_a_loose_lion_downstairs_and_a_nurse_and_two_children_in_the_loft">"There was a loose lion downstairs and a nurse and two children in the loft."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#His_vanity_got_the_better_of_him_when_he_turned_his_back_on_the_lion_to_bow_to_the_audience">"His vanity got the better of him when he turned his back on the lion, to bow to the audience."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Broncho_was_only_a_half-breed">"Broncho was only a half-breed."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#We_didnt_have_any_regular_snake_charmer_but_Merritt_made_himself_up_for_a_Hindoo_fakir">"We didn't have any regular snake charmer, but Merritt made himself up for a Hindoo fakir."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Sam_Watson_confessed_the_whole_thing">"Sam Watson confessed the whole thing."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Walking_upon_its_hind_legs_BACKWARD">"Walking upon its hind legs, <span class="smcapl">BACKWARD</span>."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Forepaugh_had_eminent_scientists_examine_the_beast">"Forepaugh had eminent scientists examine the beast."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Then_Sam_and_his_groom_Telford_proceeded_to_get_busy">"Then Sam and his groom, Telford, proceeded to get busy."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_187">"There seems to be a sympathy between them."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Tramp_was_slowly_drawing_nearer_to_the_cage">"Tramp was slowly drawing nearer to the cage."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#The_bear_sat_comfortably_on_the_seat_beside_me">"The bear sat comfortably on the seat beside me."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#He_made_sheeps_eyes_and_threw_a_chest">"He made sheep's eyes and threw a chest."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#The_first_tiger_bounded_through_the_door">"The first tiger bounded through the door."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Depew_was_still_crouched_on_the_body_of_his_victim">"Depew was still crouched on the body of his victim."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Depew_coughing_and_choking_drew_back">"Depew, coughing and choking, drew back."</a></p>
+<p class="loi"><a href="#Page_229">"Merritt was quick enough to get a strangle hold around the snake's neck."</a></p></div>
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[1]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ<br />
+AND THE<br />
+REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[3]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ<br />
+AND THE<br />
+REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Madame Morelli</span>, the pretty
+little Frenchwoman who makes a
+half-score of leopards, panthers
+and jaguars do things which nature never
+intended them to do, had finished her act
+and driven the snarling performers through
+the narrow runway to their separate cages,
+fastening each one, as she thought, securely.
+Two French clowns were filling in the time
+and making the audience of Coney Island
+pleasure seekers laugh by their antics with
+a performing dog, while the stage hands
+were bringing in the properties for the next
+trained animal act, when the Proprietor
+came from behind the scenes and strolled,
+apparently unconcerned, to the back of
+the Arena, where he could command a
+clear view of the performance, the audience<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[4]</a></span>
+and the cages. He said a few words to
+each of the trainers and keepers whom he
+passed, and the Stranger, who knew the
+clock-like regularity with which each one of
+them went through his allotted duties, noticed
+an unwonted haste and suppressed excitement
+among them.</p>
+
+<p>As he joined the Proprietor the sound of
+hammering mingled with the noise of the
+blatant brass band and the cries of the ballyhoo
+spielers for the other Dreamland attractions,
+which came in through the open windows,
+and he saw that Stevenson, the mild
+eyed quiet man who is always on hand to
+rescue imperiled trainers and keepers when
+their own carelessness, or unexpected revolt
+on the part of the animals, leads to a fight,
+was rapidly nailing boards over the ventilating
+spaces above the cages. Madam Morelli,
+whip and training rod in hand, hurried from
+her dressing room to the runway, and every
+keeper and trainer seemed to be loitering in
+the space between the leopards' den and the
+audience.</p>
+
+<p>He looked at the Proprietor inquiringly,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[5]</a></span>
+but the little trickle of blood which ran down
+his cheek from under his cap answered the
+question he would have asked, an animal was
+loose and the Proprietor had encountered it
+in his rounds. A crash of weird music from
+the band drowned the sound of a cracking
+whip and sharp commands which came from
+the runway, and announced the appearance<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[6]</a></span>
+of Brandu, the snake charmer, in the exhibition
+cage, and the audience watched him play
+with a cobra, all unconscious that Franz, the
+jaguar, which a few minutes before had
+desisted from his attempt to tear the fair
+shoulders of Morelli only after a dozen
+blank cartridges had been fired in his face,
+was a gentleman-at-large in Dreamland.
+The Proprietor gave a sigh of relief as the
+jaguar backed into his cage from the runway,
+snarling and striking at the little
+woman who forced him backward with the
+whip until she was able to slam the door and
+make him once more a prisoner. When she
+passed them on her way back to the dressing-room,
+her dress was torn, and her eyes were
+flashing from the excitement of the encounter
+and anger at the carelessness of the carpenter
+who had left a board loose at the top
+of the den.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 564px;"><a name="The_table_in_front_of_the_Arena" id="The_table_in_front_of_the_Arena"></a>
+<img src="images/001.png" width="564" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+The table in front of the Arena.</div>
+
+<p>"Of course, that might have been a serious
+thing for the jaguar and for my pocket
+book," said the Proprietor as three deep
+scratches in his head were being plastered
+up. "I couldn't afford to take any chances<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[7]</a></span>
+of an accident, and he would have been shot
+if he had attempted to come through a ventilator
+into the Arena, but a trained animal
+like that is worth a goodish bit of money.
+He let me know he was loose by giving me
+his love pat when I was walking through
+the runway, and as Morelli is the only one
+who can do anything with him I sent for<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[8]</a></span>
+her. She can whip considerably more than
+her own weight in wild-cats, and there was
+not the slightest danger to the audience, but
+not many men would have relished her task
+of going into that passage with the beast
+loose on top of the cages." He negatived the
+Press Agent's suggestion to make a scare-head
+story of the escape for the papers, and
+suggested that they should go up and hear
+Madam Morelli's account of it. She was sitting
+on the edge of her bed, mending a rip
+which the jaguar's sharp claws had made in
+her gown, and she shrugged her shoulders
+when the Stranger inquired if she had been
+hurt.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 518px;"><a name="Two_French_clowns_and_a_performing_dog" id="Two_French_clowns_and_a_performing_dog"></a>
+<img src="images/002.png" width="518" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+Two French clowns and a performing dog.</div>
+
+<p>"It was nothing," she said laughing. "He
+jumped at me from the top of a cage when
+I came in, but I beat him off and whipped
+him back into his cage. It was only the close
+quarters which made it bad, for I am used
+to fighting them." She was interrupted by
+a yapping and caterwauling in the doorway,
+and sprang on the bed, her face white with
+terror, as a small terrier and the menagerie
+cat rolled into the room in a clawing, biting<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[9]</a></span>
+mix-up. The terrier was raising a litter of
+puppies in the next room, and the cat had
+transformed the space back of Morelli's bed
+into a feline nursery, and a meeting of the
+two anxious mothers in the hall had led to
+trouble. Madam Morelli always goes
+through her performance in an evening
+dress, and she stood on the bed, her long train
+gathered closely about her, trembling like a
+leaf, when the Proprietor finally separated
+the combatants and restored peace.</p>
+
+<p>"You wouldn't think that a woman who
+had just come from a fight with a two hundred
+pound jaguar, which could easily tear
+her to pieces, would be scared at a scrap between
+a toy terrier and a mongrel cat," said
+the Proprietor, laughing, as he led the way
+to the caf&eacute; table. "But she makes a specialty
+of the larger species."</p>
+
+<p>"This matter of specialties seems to run
+through every branch of the show business,"
+said the Press Agent as they took their seats
+at the table. "I ran a dime museum in St.
+Louis a few years ago&mdash;in those days there
+was lots of money in it&mdash;and the freaks<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[10]</a></span>
+would never stand for any change in their
+billing. We used to have a fresh lot sent on
+by our New York agent every two weeks,
+and one Monday morning when I went
+down to look over the new arrivals, I knew
+that he had been up against the demon Rum,
+when he engaged such a tough looking
+bunch. The alleged fat woman looked as
+if she was wasting away with consumption,
+and the bearded lady had a way of absentmindedly
+humming the popular airs in a
+bass voice which gave the whole snap away.
+There was one likely looking girl and when
+I asked her what she was she told me she was
+the web-footed lady and showed me her feet,
+which had little pieces of skin growing between
+the toes.</p>
+
+<p>"I knew that wasn't good enough, so I
+told her she was mistaken; that she was a
+Circassian beauty, and I gave her a wig and
+the fixings and put her on the platform. But
+say, would you believe it? She was so mad
+and embarrassed by the change in her stunt
+that when the lecturer was calling attention
+to her blond beauty, she would blush until<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[11]</a></span>
+she looked like an Indian Princess, and every
+time he turned his back she would take off
+her shoes and wiggle her toes at the audience
+to show what she really was.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 543px;"><a name="Things_which_Nature_never_intended_them_to_do" id="Things_which_Nature_never_intended_them_to_do"></a>
+<img src="images/003.png" width="543" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Things which Nature never intended them to do."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"It was up to us to get some real attraction
+to tide over the time until our agent<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</a></span>
+should get sober and send us another bunch
+of freaks, so Merritt, who was my partner,
+and myself hunted up a big buck nigger and
+made a deal with him to go on as a 'Wild
+Man.' We ripped up a hair mattress and
+glued the contents onto him, and wired a
+couple of big tusks to his teeth, and with an
+iron collar around his neck and a log chain
+around his waist he was as good an imitation
+as was ever faked. We put him in a big
+cage which we had used the week before
+for a mangy old lion; one of the five hundred
+or so 'Wallace the Untamables' which
+were touring the country, and Merritt
+taught him to howl like a steam calliope.</p>
+
+<p>"We called him 'Fuzzy Wuzzy, the Terrible
+Man-Eating Cannibal,' which was a
+waste of words, but Merritt had language
+to burn. He had got hold of a phony five
+hundred dollar bill, and when he was giving
+his spiel about how Fuzzy Wuzzy was captured
+upon a desert island, where he was
+found chewing a human leg, and how he
+couldn't eat anything but raw meat, and was
+always trying to get at his keeper for dessert,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</a></span>
+he would wave his phony five hundred
+spot over his head and give it to 'em good.</p>
+
+<p>"'Five hundred dollars, ladies and gents,
+I will give to any man who will remain for
+the short space of two minutes in the cage
+with Fuzzy Wuzzy! Five hundred dollars
+to any man who is brave enough to run the
+risk of letting this terrible man-eating cannibal
+get his hinder limbs about him, for
+then all would be lost and Fuzzy Wuzzy
+would fasten his terrible fangs in his victim's
+throat and suck his ber-lud.'</p>
+
+<p>"Well, it was a good spiel, all right, all
+right, and when Merritt struck that part one
+of the supers would prod up old Fuzzy, who
+would rattle his chains and howl for fair, and
+the audience would get cold chills down their
+backs. We were playing to the S. R. O.,
+and giving so many shows a day that Merritt
+pretty nearly lost his voice, and Fuzzy
+had been prodded so much that he had to
+take his meals standing up. We ran 'em
+through pretty fast, and one afternoon Merritt
+was just going to give the 'All out'
+signal, which cleared the exhibition hall for<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</a></span>
+the next performance, when up steps a big
+husky black roustabout from the levee and
+commences to strip off his coat.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jes' a minit, boss,' says he. 'Ah reckon
+ah needs dat five hundred in mah bizness,'
+and Merritt looks at him in astonishment.</p>
+
+<p>"'My deluded colored brother,' says he,
+'Do you appreciate the fact that you are
+going to a certain and horrible death? If
+this terrible Fuzzy Wuzzy gets his hinder
+limbs about you he will suck your ber-lud.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Ah doan reckon he'll git me, an' ah suttenly
+needs de money,' answers the coon, and
+continues to strip, and Merritt sizes him up
+and sees the finish of Fuzzy Wuzzy, who was
+shaking the bars and trying to get away
+from the super who was prodding him; but
+everybody thought he was trying to get at
+the coon to make a meal of him, and some
+of the women folks were getting hysterics.
+One of the boys had put me wise, and I
+broke through the crowd and called a halt in
+the proceedings.</p>
+
+<p>"'Ladies and gentlemen,' says I, 'I didn't
+believe that a man existed who was foolhardy<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[16]</a></span>
+enough to be tempted to certain death
+by the lure of a paltry five hundred dollars.
+But although this man is so reckless of his
+own life, I must insist that he get a permit
+from the mayor, relieving us from all responsibility,
+before we allow him to be torn
+limb from limb. Return to-morrow at two
+o'clock, and if this man's courage still keeps
+up, you will see before your shuddering eyes
+an encounter which will make the historical
+gladiatorial combats of ancient Rome pale
+into insignificance.' I could sling a few language
+myself, those days, and the mayor
+was a friend of mine&mdash;or I thought he was&mdash;so
+I figured we could catch the suckers for
+an admission and then call it off, because he
+would refuse a permit.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 470px;"><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15"></a>
+<img src="images/004.png" width="470" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Blank cartridges fired in his face."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"But he was onto the game and he was one
+of those blame fools who thought he had a
+sense of humor, so he gives him a document
+with a big red seal on it which looks like a
+doctor's diploma, which says that Thomas
+Jefferson is allowed to go in and win our
+five hundred, and the next day the coon
+shows up smiling and ready, and I knew we<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[17]</a></span>
+had to make good somehow. I passed the
+word to Merritt to delay the game and make
+a last grand effort to throw a scare into the
+coon, and he put up a spiel to beat the band.</p>
+
+<p>"'This terrible Fuzzy Wuzzy has none of
+the attributes of a human being,' says he.
+'He lives upon raw meat and would prefer
+human flesh if he could get it. Observe the
+expression of ghoulish glee in his eyes as he
+regards the foolhardy man who will soon
+furnish him such a meal as he formerly enjoyed
+in his native jungle. He sleeps at
+night suspended from the top bars of his
+cage by his claw-like hands and feet, which
+will soon be tearing the flesh of this man
+who stands before you now, a picture of
+perfect health and strength. He speaks no
+intelligible language, but he utters howls
+and yells, which will be more horrible than
+ever before when he is sucking the warm
+heart's be-lud of the figure which you see
+before you for the last time in human shape.'
+Just then the super gives Fuzzy a prod and
+he howls like Balaam's ass, but the coon
+stands there smiling and not feazed a bit.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[18]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"'It's a sad sight,' continues Merritt, 'to
+see a fine man in the prime of life, like our
+colored brother here, crushed into an unrecognizable
+mass by the terrible hinder limbs
+of this man-eating cannibal and then torn to
+shreds by his horrible fangs. The management
+of this highly moral and intellectual
+show will provide a funeral for the remains,
+if there are any, and now, ladies and gents,
+I call upon you to witness that we are not
+responsible for the terrible end which awaits
+this reckless man.'</p>
+
+<p>"I had taken the precaution to button up
+the box office 'take' in my inside pocket, and
+while Merritt was making a bluff at looking
+for the key to the cage door I looked
+around to see that there was a free exit, for
+the coon was standing there swelling out his
+chest and grinning as if he had the five hundred
+already in his jeans, and I knew he
+couldn't be bluffed out. Just then a typical
+antebellum Missourian, one of the kind that
+has to be shown, steps up in front. He was
+tanked up until his safety valve would have
+blown off if it hadn't been wired down, but<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[19]</a></span>
+he was pretty steady on his pins when he held
+onto the railing in front of the cage.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 553px;"><a name="Five_hundred_dollars_to_any_one_who_will_enter_the_cage" id="Five_hundred_dollars_to_any_one_who_will_enter_the_cage"></a>
+<img src="images/005.png" width="553" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Five hundred dollars to any
+one who will enter the cage."</div>
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[20]</a></span>"'Professah,' says he, 'did I undahstand
+yo' all correctly to say that this yeah object
+in the cage has none of the attributes of the
+human race?'</p>
+
+<p>"'Correct!' says Merritt, glad of an excuse
+to delay things. 'He is lower than the
+beasts of the field.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Well, he suttenly aint much to look at,'
+says the Southerner, looking him over carefully.
+'He won't eat like folks&mdash;he can't
+talk&mdash;an' he sleeps like a bat. I dunno why
+such a pusillanimous critter should cumber
+the yearth,' and with that he puts his hand
+to his hip and pulls out a forty-five from
+under the tails of his coat. Fuzzy takes one
+look at it, and it didn't need any prodding to
+make him holler, and he tries to tear off the
+false tusks.</p>
+
+<p>"'Foh Gawd's sake, mistah, doan shoot!'
+he yells. 'Dat white mahn's been tellin' a
+passel ob lies about me until ah's sartain
+suah somefing gwine fer to git me. Ah can
+eat an' talk like any one, an' mos' ebery one<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[21]</a></span>
+knows me about yeah wen ah ain't got dese
+yeah contraptions on.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Shut up, you blame fool!' says Merritt.
+'He won't shoot you.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Mebbe he knows dat, mebbe you knows
+dat; but how does I know dat?' yells Fuzzy.
+'Dat gun suttenly looks big to me.'</p>
+
+<p>"About this time the other coon got wise
+and saw the five hundred vanishing, and the
+last I saw of Merritt he was trying to break
+a half-Nelson that the coon had got on him
+and dodge the rest of the crowd at the same
+time. I left St. Louis on a freight that
+night, wearing a few lumps where some
+stray brickbats landed, and the next time I
+saw Merritt was in Chicago, and he was on
+crutches and had his head covered with
+plaster."</p>
+
+<p>No thunderbolt dropped from the blue
+dome over the Dreamland tower, and the
+Proprietor, with a childlike and bland smile
+on his face, motioned to the waiter to refill
+the glasses.</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[23]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE BITE OF A RATTLER<br />
+AND<br />
+THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[25]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE BITE OF A RATTLER<br />
+AND<br />
+THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Like</span> the pitcher which went to the well
+until it met the proverbial fate, the
+trainer entered the lion's den once too
+often, and what remained of him was
+placed in an ambulance and taken to the
+hospital. After the performance for the
+evening was over, Baltimore, the bad lion,
+who had suddenly developed a craving for
+human flesh, had been dealt with by the Proprietor
+of the menagerie in a manner which
+would spoil his appetite for many a day to
+come and make him remember that trainers
+cannot be mangled with impunity.</p>
+
+<p>Most of the lights were extinguished at
+Dreamland, but two men sat at the table
+in front of the Arena with the Proprietor,
+discussing the accident and listening to stories
+of former encounters which he related.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[26]</a></span>
+His own body bears the scars of many a
+battle with his savage charges, but he has
+discontinued giving personal exhibitions
+with them in the large cage, because his wife
+has developed a prejudice against having
+him brought to her in fragments, and he has
+found that the training of trainers is a far
+more difficult task than the education of wild
+animals.</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, any man who follows this business
+carries his life in his hands," he said in answer
+to a question from the Stranger within
+the gates. "You helped to care for poor
+Bonavita to-night, after Baltimore finished
+with him, so you know what a lion's jaws
+can do. I've seen 'em chewed up as bad as
+that and get over it, but they never get quite
+the same again. Leave the business? No;
+it is like the sea: a man who takes to it keeps
+it up until the time comes when he doesn't
+recover, but after a bad accident he usually
+takes another breed of animals.</p>
+
+<p>"The worst sight I ever saw was about five
+years ago, when one of our performing
+bears turned on its trainer and seized<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[27]</a></span>
+his arm. He worried
+it as a terrier would a
+bone for a good twenty
+minutes before we could
+drive him off, and the
+bear died from the punishment
+we gave him.
+The man's arm isn't
+much use to him now,
+but he is crazy for me
+to give him another
+group of animals to
+train, which I can't do
+because a man needs
+two good pairs of limbs
+when he gets into the
+exhibition cage." He
+told of many accidents
+which had happened to
+himself and his employees,
+most of them
+through their own carelessness,
+born of constant
+association with
+their charges who never<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[28]</a></span>
+miss the opportunity which the shortest instant
+of forgetfulness gives them.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="A_constant_procession_of_small_animals_moving_down_his_throat" id="A_constant_procession_of_small_animals_moving_down_his_throat"></a>
+<img src="images/006.png" width="650" height="150" alt="" title="" />
+"A constant procession of small animals moving down his throat."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"I said that bear attack was the worst
+sight I ever saw, and it was; but something
+happened here last year which impressed me
+more because it was so mysterious. A friend
+of mine in Florida shipped me a box of rattlers,
+which he wrote had been 'attended to,'
+and I supposed that their poison fangs had
+been extracted. They were delivered just
+before the performance started and I ripped
+a board off the box and stuck my hand in,
+grabbing them one by one and throwing
+them into the den as if they were garter
+snakes.</p>
+
+<p>"The man who took care of the snakes was
+out on the ballyhoo, walking around with
+the gander following him to advertise the
+show; and when he came in he looked them
+over and found that each one had as pretty a
+pair of fangs as you would wish to see. He
+told me about it and I confess that it gave
+me a gone feeling in the pit of my stomach,
+for I remembered how I had felt around for
+them in the box with my bare hands.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[29]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"I am pretty busy while a performance
+is going on, so I told him to let them alone
+until I had a chance to examine them.
+Ninety per cent. of the accidents which occur
+in a menagerie comes from the disregard
+of ordinary precautions or the disobedience
+of orders, and I had a presentiment that
+something was going to happen and I was
+keeping an extra vigilant eye on the performers
+in the big exhibition cage. Well, it
+happened, all right; but not in the way that
+I expected.</p>
+
+<p>"The snake man instead of getting back
+on the ballyhoo where he belonged, stood
+around the snake cage, watching the new
+rattlers, and along came a couple of gazabos
+who commenced talking about them. One
+of them was the wise guy, who always knows
+about how the animals are doped so they
+won't bite and all that other information
+which isn't so. He commenced explaining
+how the snakes were harmless, because their
+teeth had been pulled, and giving a lot of
+misinformation about them. The snake
+man listened until he couldn't stand it any<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[30]</a></span>
+longer and then he stuck his hand into the
+cage and grabbed one of the rattlers by the
+neck.</p>
+
+<p>"'Fangs pulled, eh?' says he, and he made
+the rattler open his mouth and show a perfect
+pair of stingers. The wise guy took
+one look at them and fled, and the snake man
+would have carried it off all right, only he
+was so busy calling a few choice names after
+him that he placed the snake back in the cage
+instead of throwing it in, and the rattler
+struck him before he could draw his hand
+out. He had a clown make-up on, so I
+couldn't tell whether he was pale or not
+when he came to me a few minutes later and
+held out his hand, but there was a queer expression
+on his face and I knew that my apprehensions
+had not been groundless.</p>
+
+<p>"There were just two little red dots, no
+bigger than pin heads, on the back of his
+hand.</p>
+
+<p>"'You got it, didn't you?' says I.</p>
+
+<p>"'Good and plenty,' says he. 'My arm
+hurts me already.'</p>
+
+<p>"We got busy right away and took him up<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[32]</a></span>
+to the hospital where Bonavita is now. Say,
+he was a very thin man and you can see that
+I'm no lightweight; but by midnight the
+right side of his body and his right arm and
+leg were swollen to my size, and in the morning
+all of the swollen part was as black as a
+coal. He was suffering terribly, and I tried
+to get hold of the Arab snake doctor but
+couldn't locate him, so I wired to Rochester
+for Rattlesnake Pete. He came down and
+a mighty interesting man he is, but he
+couldn't do anything which 'Doc' up at the
+hospital hadn't done, and it was five days
+before my man was out of danger. He was
+not a drinking man&mdash;I finished having
+drunkards around my show a good many
+years ago&mdash;and the whiskey took right hold
+of him and pulled him through. 'Doc' kept
+squirting some red stuff into his arm, but it
+was the 'red-eye' which saved him&mdash;and that
+reminds me."</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 367px;"><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31"></a>
+<img src="images/007.png" width="367" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"The wise guy."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>He beckoned to the waiter and each one
+ordered his favorite antidote for a possible
+snake bite.</p>
+
+<p>"Did he return to the show?" asked the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[33]</a></span>
+Stranger, after he had rendered himself immune.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 333px;"><a name="Noah_listens_to_the_tale_of_a_Johnstown_flood_survivor" id="Noah_listens_to_the_tale_of_a_Johnstown_flood_survivor"></a>
+<img src="images/008.png" width="333" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+Noah listens to the tale of a Johnstown flood survivor.</div>
+
+<p>"He sure did; you couldn't keep him
+away, but he has never been fond of snakes
+since. It is the same man whom you saw
+putting the group of elephants through
+their paces to-night."<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[34]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>It was growing late, and the Proprietor
+announced that he was going to show his
+wife a good husband and said good-night,
+but the Stranger waited for the story which
+he saw was trembling upon his companion's
+lips, and induced the sleepy waiter to bring
+a farewell dose of snake-bite antidote. The
+man was unknown to him by name, but his
+personality promised to be interesting, for
+his face spoke of good living, the red of his
+complexion was evidently not entirely due to
+exposure to the sun, and the little sacs under
+the eyes indicated that he was apt to be the
+last of a convivial party to suggest breaking
+up.</p>
+
+<p>He had listened to the Proprietor's stories
+with the same bored expression which Noah
+might wear in hearing the experiences of a
+survivor of the Johnstown flood, and he
+looked regretfully at the vacant chair, now
+that his turn had come.</p>
+
+<p>"Snakes!" he exclaimed with a contemptuous
+snort. "What does the boss
+know about 'em? I used to own the only
+snake that was worth having. Ever hear of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[35]</a></span>
+'Big Pete'?" The Stranger confessed his
+ignorance, and the other settled back in his
+chair and lighted a fresh cigar.</p>
+
+<p>"I'll tell you about him, then. You know
+that a snake is a queer proposition in a menagerie.
+They get sore mouths&mdash;canker the
+fakirs call it&mdash;and won't eat, and then, if
+you've got any investment in 'em you want
+to get it out mighty quick, for they are no
+orchids. I was pretty well on my uppers,
+after a bad season on the road, when a guy
+named Merritt came to me and said he
+could get a fine snake cheap, and he thought
+we might make some money out of him by
+showing him to the Rubes at the county
+fairs.</p>
+
+<p>"What I didn't know about snakes would
+have filled a book, but when I saw this one I
+knew it was a bargain. It was the blamedest
+biggest snake that ever gave a wriggle, and
+the only reason its owners had not made a
+fortune was because it was never properly
+advertised. I used to know just how much
+he weighed and how long he was, but my
+brain got so tired figuring up the money we<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[36]</a></span>
+made out of him that I've had no memory
+for figures since.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, as I said, I was pretty hard up, but
+I had this sparkler left for 'fall money,' and
+when I saw that snake I pushed it over my
+uncle's counter." He pointed to a large
+yellow diamond in his scarf, and the
+Stranger tried to make a mental calculation
+of a pawnbroker's valuation of it.</p>
+
+<p>"Merritt managed to dig up some mazuma,
+and we chipped in fifty apiece and became
+the proud possessors of Big Pete. If
+I had been wise to the business I would have
+known there was something wrong to make
+him sell so cheap, but we more than got our
+money back out of him the first week, so we
+had no kick coming. The newspaper boys
+were good to us and gave us a lot of space,
+and we were playing on velvet and had Pete
+besides. It was such a cinch that Merritt,
+who looked after the snake while I did the
+spieling and sold tickets on the front, commenced
+to get worried for fear we should
+lose him.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says he to me one morning when<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[37]</a></span>
+business was a little dull, 'I believe there's
+something phony about the blame snake.
+He won't eat and I've tempted him with the
+best I could get. I guess I'll run down to
+the Bowery and get one of those snake
+sharps to come up and have a look at him; I
+believe his teeth need filling.'</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 454px;"><a name="Just_two_little_red_dots_on_the_back_of_his_hand" id="Just_two_little_red_dots_on_the_back_of_his_hand"></a>
+<img src="images/009.png" width="454" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Just two little red dots on the back of his hand."</div>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[38]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"I knew he was stuck on a girl that was
+doing a turn in a music hall down that way,
+but business was dull, so I let him go without
+raising a holler. The next day he comes
+back with a jaw-carpenter who claimed he
+knew all about snakes and when he gets
+through looking at Pete's mouth we felt
+pretty blue.</p>
+
+<p>"'Canker!' says he. 'Your little snakelet
+may live a month.'</p>
+
+<p>"Well, that put it up to us to get busy, so
+I did the spieling on the outside until my
+voice gave out, and Merritt lied on the inside
+until he was black in the face, telling the
+Rubes about how many sheep old Pete swallowed
+every week. We had a lot of rabbits
+and doves with him in the cage, hopping and
+flying around behind the thick glass front,
+and they were real sociable with old Pete,
+who never batted an eye at 'em. At the end
+of the month he was looking pretty thin and
+we were afraid he would peg out any day.
+It was hard luck on us, for things were coming
+our way and our bank rolls were getting
+good and plenty thick and they were all<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[39]</a></span>
+'yellow boys,' from the case card to the wrapper.
+Our wads grew fatter as Pete grew
+thinner, and we were looking for some easy
+mark to unload him onto, when one morning
+Merritt comes running out, just as I was
+staving off a farmer who had heard him lie
+and brought around a flock of scabby sheep
+to sell to us for snake food.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' he yells, grabbing me by the shoulders
+and waltzing around like a whirling
+dervish, 'we'll make Vanderbilt and Rockefeller
+look like thirty cents; old Pete has
+swallowed every blame pigeon and rabbit in
+the coop.'</p>
+
+<p>"It seemed too good to be true, but when
+I went to have a look there was not a feather
+nor a piece of fur to be seen and old Pete
+was examining all the corners of the cage to
+see that he hadn't overlooked a bit. He
+looked a whole lot better already, and Merritt
+and I began to discuss what we should
+do with all our money.</p>
+
+<p>"But say, there was one thing we forgot
+to reckon on&mdash;the appetite he had been saving
+for about a year, and although the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[40]</a></span>
+money came in faster than ever, most of it
+went out to the rabbit men and pigeon
+fanciers.</p>
+
+<p>"You know that when a snake swallows
+an animal you can see the bulge in him
+for a long time, but you couldn't see any in
+old Pete. He was just the same size all the
+way from his nose to the tip of his tail, for
+there was no space between the animals.</p>
+
+<p>"Things began to look pretty serious for
+us, for we had used up all the available small
+live stock in the surrounding country, and
+the Rubes got onto the fact that we were up
+against their game and raised the ante on us
+for what was left. It's like taking candy
+from a child to sell a gold brick to a farmer,
+but he everlastingly gets back at you if you
+have to buy any of his produce. Hungry
+Joe and the man who invented the green-goods
+game would be skinned to death if
+they had to buy a dozen eggs from one of
+'em.</p>
+
+<p>"And all the time old Pete kept a constant
+procession of small animals moving
+down his throat, regardless of expense, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[41]</a></span>
+if the supply ran short he would look at
+Merritt so reproachfully that it made him
+feel so bad he couldn't deliver his lecture for
+sobs. He worked the pathetic on him, but
+if I came around there was no 'Only three
+grains of corn, mother,' expression on his
+face; he would just rear up on his tail and
+lambaste that glass trying to get at me. I
+had been living pretty well during our prosperity
+and I guess I looked good to him, so
+rather than have any hard feelings about it
+I stuck closer than ever to the front of the
+house.</p>
+
+<p>"We had rented a frame building in a
+little town up on the Hudson and were
+showing him off in good form. Business
+was rushing and we had the S. R. O. sign
+out all the time, but snake food was getting
+scarcer than boiled lobsters during the cold
+snap last winter. The show had closed up
+for night and we were trying to make dents
+in the front of the tavern bar with our breast
+bones and laying in a stock of supplies, in
+case old Pete should bite us.</p>
+
+<p>"While we were discussing the best way<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[42]</a></span>
+to stimulate the rabbit-breeding industry,
+'biff&mdash;boom&mdash;bang,' went the town bell and
+the barkeep commenced to peel off his coat
+and get into a red flannel shirt and a fireman's
+helmet. It was one of those towns
+where they have a dude volunteer fire department,
+which the boys all join for the
+socials in the winter and to look pretty on
+the annual parade day. Merritt and I didn't
+hurry any; we knew that it would take some
+time for the chief, who kept the town drug
+store, to get into his red shirt and shiny boots
+and select the bouquet to carry in the big end
+of his speaking trumpet. Pretty soon, 'Always
+Ready, Ever Faithful, Hose Company
+Number One,' which comprised the department,
+came down the street, all of the company
+shouting orders through trumpets at
+the two coons who were pulling the cart.</p>
+
+<p>"Of course, we went along to see the
+'Fighting the Flames' show, but say: the
+joke was on us, for it was our theater which
+provided it. There wasn't anything left to
+burn and the hose company marched
+proudly back. Poor old Pete was nothing<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[43]</a></span>
+but a heap of ashes and Merritt looked sorrowful.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says he, 'let's copper the rabbit
+market before they get wise.'"</p>
+
+<p>"Did you have no insurance?" asked the
+Stranger sympathetically.</p>
+
+<p>"Not a blame cent," replied his companion
+as he rose to go to bed. "But I am
+making good money out of old Pete yet.
+I had him stuffed and get a hundred a week
+from a dime museum for him&mdash;and they
+furnish the feed."</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[45]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE AMOROUS BABOON</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[47]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE AMOROUS BABOON</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Thanks</span> to the busy Press Agent,
+the fame of Jocko the Jealous, the
+amorous baboon, had preceded him
+to America, and when the animals from
+the Paris Hippodrome had been safely
+transferred to their dens in the Arena at
+Dreamland he was the center of attraction
+as he limbered up his muscles in the large
+monkey cage, after the cramped accommodations
+of the small traveling box. He had
+gained a reputation as a masher in Paris; but
+never had the menagerie attendants seen
+him so madly in love and so insanely jealous
+as upon his first introduction to American
+beauty, as exemplified by the fair woman
+who stood before his cage.</p>
+
+<p>Jocko was not the first male being who
+had been fascinated by the charms of the
+Prima Donna during her career; for she had<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[48]</a></span>
+been through the marriage ceremony so
+often that she could say it backwards, never
+forgetting to cross her fingers before saying,
+"Until death do us part." The Proprietor
+drew the Stranger's attention to the group
+before the cage, a mischievous smile on his
+face as he looked over the half dozen of callow
+youths who are always in the train of the
+Prima Donna.</p>
+
+<p>"Watch out for squalls over there," he
+said. "Jocko is affectionate now, but there
+will be something doing in a few minutes."
+The monkey was using all of the blandishments
+known to an amorous baboon and
+although the words of his soft chattering
+were unintelligible, their import could not
+be mistaken by a past mistress of the gentle
+art of love making; but the Prima Donna
+could not be beguiled into placing herself
+within reach of the hairy paws. Suddenly
+his mood changed, for one of her male companions
+placed his hand on her arm to attract
+her attention and Jocko, giving a howl
+of rage, danced madly up and down on all
+fours, showing a vicious set of fangs as his<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[50]</a></span>
+lips curled back in a hideous snarl. The bars
+of his cage were strong and so close together
+that he could not get out to attack his rival;
+but he gathered up a mass of litter from the
+floor and showered Prima Donna and callow
+youth alike. His screams echoed through
+the Arena and caused even the majestic lions
+and the haughty tigers to look in the direction
+of the cage of the despised "Bandar
+Log," and made the smaller animals uneasy.
+The woman who was described on the programme
+as "Miss &mdash;&mdash;, Famous Society
+Woman," had torn herself away from her
+arduous social duties with the Four Hundred
+to exhibit a troupe of leopards to a
+Coney Island audience, her identity concealed
+by a small black mask, and her performance
+in the big cage was interrupted
+by the noise; so the Proprietor thought it
+time to interfere.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49"></a>
+<img src="images/010.png" width="650" height="486" alt="" title="" />
+"He smoked his cigar in the lobby like any other guest."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>The Prima Donna laughed good-naturedly
+as he helped to brush the sawdust and
+litter from her dress and tactfully drew her
+away, and Jocko quieted down and implored
+her to return; but she was accustomed to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[51]</a></span>
+gentler wooing, and refused to put her
+dainty gown again in jeopardy.</p>
+
+<p>"Jocko gave quite a performance to-night,"
+said the Proprietor as he joined the
+Press Agent and the Stranger at the table,
+after the show. "That baboon is crazy
+about women; but he hasn't the discrimination
+of Consul, the most intelligent monkey
+that ever lived. You may remember that he
+was never quiet in his cage, but if a specially
+well-dressed woman stopped in front of it he
+played entirely to her and when she moved
+away his eyes followed her as long as she was
+in sight."</p>
+
+<p>"There will never be another like Consul,"
+said the Press Agent, shaking his head
+sadly. "He made my job a sinecure, for
+he was good for a column any day and a
+full page on Sundays."</p>
+
+<p>"Never until the Missing Link is discovered,"
+replied the Proprietor. "I don't believe
+a more human monkey will ever be
+found, and I attribute his wonderful intelligence
+to the fact that he associated entirely
+with human beings, almost from the day of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[52]</a></span>
+his birth. I got him from the captain of a
+tramp steamer which traded to the West
+Coast, and I paid a goodish bit of money for
+him too. I have never dared to tell his early
+history as it was told to me, for fear I should
+be laughed at for a liar; but stranger things
+happen in the animal business than ever get
+into print, and if I dared risk my reputation
+by telling the things which actually occur in
+a menagerie, I should never need a Press
+Agent; but a plausible lie is accepted where
+a truth which sounds improbable is turned
+down."</p>
+
+<p>The Press Agent looked at him reproachfully,
+but agreed with the proposition.</p>
+
+<p>"Do you know, I have found that to be
+true when I have visited the newspaper
+offices," he said. "I have actually had to
+embroider some of the accounts of things
+which have happened here."</p>
+
+<p>"I suspected it, for I didn't recognize
+some of the stories when I saw them in
+print," answered the Proprietor, smiling at
+him approvingly. He consented to tell the
+history of Consul, the famous chimpanzee,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[53]</a></span>
+when the Stranger expressed his entire credulity
+and the Press Agent assumed an encouraging
+and sympathetic attitude.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 489px;"><a name="Jocko_giving_a_howl_of_rage_danced_madly_up_and_down" id="Jocko_giving_a_howl_of_rage_danced_madly_up_and_down"></a>
+<img src="images/011.png" width="489" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Jocko, giving a howl of rage, danced madly up and down."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Of course, I have to take the ship captain's
+word for what happened before I
+bought him, but from the way the chimp developed
+and the intelligence he displayed<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[54]</a></span>
+after he came into my possession, I am prepared
+to believe it. He told me that he got
+him from the natives at the mouth of a small
+river on the West Coast, where he anchored
+his steamer to trade. They came off about
+the ship in their canoes, but he did not care
+for the rubber and ivory they had to offer
+and he was about to hoist anchor when one
+of them, who was in a small canoe with a
+woman, motioned to him to stop. The woman
+was crouched up in the stern, nursing
+what the captain thought was a baby, but
+when the man dragged it away from her, in
+spite of her voluble protest, he saw that it
+was a small chimpanzee. The man seemed
+desperately anxious to trade&mdash;and I imagine
+the captain's trade goods were not the
+sort to meet the entire approval of the missionaries&mdash;so
+that a bargain was concluded
+and the woman's grief allayed by a generous
+share of the purchase price. As nearly as he
+could make out, she had found the little
+thing in the jungle when it was only a few
+days old and had reared it in place of a baby
+which had just died. She was a low type of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[55]</a></span>
+woman, even for an African savage, but the
+maternal instinct was strong enough to
+make her grieve for little Consul, as the
+captain christened him. The monkey
+grieved over the separation, too, but sailors
+make much of animals and he soon became
+reconciled to it.</p>
+
+<p>"Thousands of people saw him after I
+purchased him, and you can judge of the
+reputation he attained when I tell you that
+I was getting fifteen hundred dollars a week
+for him in Berlin when he died, and he was
+booked for the entire season at that price.
+People had seen him eat with a knife and
+fork, smoke a cigar, use a typewriter and do
+all of the stunts which simply aped humanity,
+but you had to live with the little
+beast to appreciate how intensely human he
+was. Everybody connected with the show
+loved him, and when I wanted to find any
+one of the employees who was off duty, or
+not in his proper place, I always went first to
+Consul's cage and I was pretty sure to locate
+him. That monkey was never still, and the
+things he would do and the pranks he would<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[56]</a></span>
+play off his own bat were more amusing
+than any of the things he had been taught.</p>
+
+<p>"When he was in company he was as well
+mannered as most men, but, of course, he
+had his prejudices and had to be watched.
+His special aversion was a negro, which is
+strange when you consider his early associations,
+and if one came around when he was
+loose he was apt to attack him. We had to
+consider that in traveling, for Consul always
+stopped at the hotels with his trainer and sat
+about the lobbies, smoking his cigar like any
+other guest, but if there were negro servants
+about, we had to be very careful not to let
+them come near him.</p>
+
+<p>"He had the reasoning power of a child
+of ten years old; he was patient when anything
+was wrong and we had to do disagreeable
+things to him, appreciating that it was
+for his benefit. Only once did we have to use
+force, when it was necessary to pull a tooth,
+and I am glad it wasn't oftener, for it took
+seven men to control him and they thought
+they had done a day's work when we finished.
+The last time he went abroad he was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[57]</a></span>
+the life of the ship, but he pretty nearly
+killed himself. The doctor prescribed a
+cough medicine for him and Consul liked it
+so well that he got up in the night, after his
+trainer had gone to sleep, opened the valise
+in which it was kept and emptied the bottle.
+I guess there must have been laudanum in it,
+for they had to work over him the rest of the
+night to save him.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 531px;"><a name="All_of_his_savage_instincts_were_aroused" id="All_of_his_savage_instincts_were_aroused"></a>
+<img src="images/012.png" width="531" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"All of his savage instincts were aroused."</div>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[58]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"He would walk the deck with the lady
+passengers, who made a great deal of him,
+and when the customary concert was given,
+nothing would do but that he must perform
+and then pass the plate for the collection.
+He was in evening dress and behaved like a
+perfect gentleman, and the collection was a
+large one. It was heaped on the plate, and he
+was just about to present it to the captain
+when Booker Washington stepped forward
+to make a contribution. The money for the
+Seaman's Home went flying to the four corners
+of the salon and the trainer had a difficult
+time in persuading Consul to retire
+without tearing the clothes off of the man
+whose only offense was his color. This was
+Consul's last voyage, for he contracted pleurisy
+and died in Berlin, and I felt worse over
+his death than I did over the burning of my
+whole menagerie in Baltimore a few years
+ago."</p>
+
+<p>"Have you found that early association
+with human beings makes the other animals
+easier to train?" asked the Stranger, and the
+Proprietor shook his head.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[59]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"No; I would rather train one taken in the
+jungle than an animal born in captivity.
+They do raise the pumas in South America
+and have them about the houses as we do
+cats; but I wouldn't trust one of 'em. And
+as for the bigger cats, the lions and tigers,
+there is no such thing as taming them. They
+may be trained to do certain things, but they
+are never trustworthy. We had a queer
+illustration of that when I was traveling
+with a caravan circus in France. One of the
+lionesses had a litter of three cubs, and in the
+excitement of the moving and strange surroundings,
+she killed two of them. We took
+the other one away and the woman who
+cooked for us volunteered to raise it. She
+became very much attached to it and developed
+the theory that she could overcome its
+savage instincts by diet, and for a time it
+looked as if she were right. The beast was
+with her for about two years and grew to a
+fine animal, but she never let him taste raw
+food. One day, when he was comfortably
+lying before the stove, she pushed him with
+her foot to get him out of the way and he<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[60]</a></span>
+resented it. Whether it was that alone, or
+whether the odor of meat which she was
+about to cook appealed to him, I don't know;
+but all of his savage instincts were aroused
+and when we secured him we found that he
+had taken most of her scalp off."</p>
+
+<p>"It's funny how some people are always
+looking for a chance to get damages," said
+the Press Agent, settling himself comfortably
+in his chair. "We had a case of it when
+Merritt and I were running a dime museum
+out West. The freaks all lived together at
+a large boarding house and one morning,
+when they reported for duty, the 'Tattooed
+Lady' was missing. It was before the days
+when they were so common and we had spent
+a lot of money to have her decorated and
+made her our star attraction. Of course,
+none of the tattooing was visible when she
+was in street costume, but when she sat on
+the platform dressed in low neck and short
+skirts the lecturer had something to talk
+about, for the menagerie pictured on her
+was a thing of beauty, and the few choice
+texts like, 'Be good and you will be happy,'<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[61]</a></span>
+which were scattered in between the animals,
+were highly moral and elevating, and that
+was one of the strong points of our show.
+Merritt used to spread himself when he was
+telling how she was shipwrecked on a desert
+island and held captive by the cruel cannibals,
+whose high priests spared her from the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[62]</a></span>
+menu to tattoo her with the symbols of their
+heathenish worship. It gave him a great
+chance to come in strong on the moral part,
+when he explained about the texts and told
+how they were added after the cannibals had
+been converted to red flannel shirts, silk hats
+and a vegetable diet, by the missionaries, and
+I have seen ancient maiden ladies moved to
+tears by his recital. So when he had to give
+his lecture without her, he got mixed up and
+called attention to the marvelous growth of
+hair on the face of the 'Circassian Beauty,'
+thinking she was the 'Bearded Lady,' and
+nearly pulled the ears off of the 'Dog Faced
+Boy,' trying to explain that he was 'The
+Man With The Rubber Skin.' Of course,
+that made trouble among the freaks, who
+are a mighty touchy lot anyway, and I have
+noticed that trouble always comes in bunches
+in the show business, so I wasn't surprised
+when a husky guy that looked like a farmer
+came in with blood in his eye and asked for
+the manager. I looked around for Merritt,
+but he had gone around the corner
+to get something to drown his sorrow, so<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[63]</a></span>
+I slipped a piece of lead pipe under my
+coat and acknowledged the soft impeachment.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 540px;"><a name="A_Tattooed_Lady_and_shes_all_covered_with_picters" id="A_Tattooed_Lady_and_shes_all_covered_with_picters"></a>
+<img src="images/013.png" width="540" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"A 'Tattooed Lady,' and she's all covered with picters."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"'Look'ee here, wot kinder a skin game
+be youse fellers runnin' here?' says the guy,
+and I took a good grip on the lead pipe and
+tried to turn away wrath by a soft answer,
+and quoting from our advertisement that it
+was a highly moral and intellectual entertainment.</p>
+
+<p>"'Not by a dern sight, it ain't,' says he.
+'It's a blasted man-trap to ketch the unwary,
+an' I'll have the law on ye an' make yer pay
+fer trifling with my young affections.' I
+have had some pretty tough things said to
+me in my day, but that was about the worst
+ever, and pretty nearly took my breath
+away, but he went right on.</p>
+
+<p>"'I deliver milk to that boardin' house
+down the street an' I see a likely lookin' gal
+there lately an' I wanted some one to help
+milk an' look after the house, so I asks her
+to marry me. She says she will, so we
+hitched up an' I never knew she was one o'
+yer dern freaks until it was too late. She<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[64]</a></span>
+says she's a "Tattooed Lady," an' she's all
+covered with picters.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Well, what's the matter with 'em?' says
+I. 'Aren't they good pictures?'</p>
+
+<p>"'Good enough,' says he, 'for them as
+likes 'em; but I don't hanker after no decorations
+o' that kind an', b'gosh, I'll make yer
+pay fer palmin' off a damaged article on me.
+She's all over snakes an' other beasts an' it
+makes me sick ter my stummick every time I
+thinks of 'em.' I tried to convince him that
+we were not responsible and that it was his
+wife's duty to have informed him.</p>
+
+<p>"'That's what I told her, dod gast her!
+But she says it's my own fault if I didn't
+know she was a "Tattooed Lady," because I
+never asked her, an' blamed if she isn't
+proud o' them picters, too.'"</p>
+
+<p>"How did you settle it&mdash;did he get damages?"
+asked the Stranger.</p>
+
+<p>"Damages!" exclaimed the Press Agent
+as he wiped the foam from his moustache.
+"Why, Merritt came in, and when he heard
+the guy's kick he lit right into him.</p>
+
+<p>"'Blame your skin!' he yelled. 'I've a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[65]</a></span>
+good mind to have you arrested for stealing
+the pictures from my art gallery. I have
+a claim on 'em, for I paid for the liquor to
+keep a sailor drunk for six weeks while he
+was doing that job.' The Rube got onto the
+fact that she was valuable, so they adjourned
+to a saloon to talk it over."</p>
+
+<p>"With what result?" asked the Proprietor,
+as he rose from the table.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, Merritt got her back on the platform,
+the Rube sold his farm, and within
+six weeks he was wearing more yellow diamonds
+and throwing a bigger chest than the
+husband of a grand opera prima donna."</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[67]</a></span></p>
+<h2>FEEDING THE SERPENTS<br />
+AND<br />
+A GRAND TRANSFORMATION</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[69]</a></span></p>
+<h2>FEEDING THE SERPENTS<br />
+AND<br />
+A GRAND TRANSFORMATION</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">The</span> animals had received their evening
+meal when the Proprietor came
+from the Arena and joined the
+Stranger and the Press Agent at the table
+outside.</p>
+
+<p>"I can never understand the interest people
+take in seeing the carnivorous animals
+fed; it is no more than giving a bone to a
+dog," he said, as he took his seat. "And yet
+it is one of the best drawing features of the
+show, and the same people remain night
+after night to see the meat poked into the
+cages. If it were not for the prohibition of
+the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to
+Animals I could give a feeding exhibition
+which would be novel and interesting, for
+comparatively few people have ever seen a
+snake eat.</p>
+
+<p>"It is because a snake will not eat unless<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[70]</a></span>
+it kills its own food," he continued in answer
+to a question from the Stranger. "Snakes
+are more particular feeders than any other
+animals, and they will not touch anything
+which is not alive when it is brought to them.
+This is the night for feeding them, and if
+you care to remain until the crowd has gone
+you can see how it is done. Long as I have
+been in the business, I learn something new
+every day, and I never saw a cobra fed artificially
+until last week, when Brandu, my
+Hindoo snake charmer, received one direct
+from India. It seems that they are cannibal
+snakes and live upon their own kind in India,
+but that would be too expensive a diet here,
+and he forces feed down its throat."</p>
+
+<p>The thousands of incandescent lights on
+the Dreamland tower went out&mdash;the signal
+that the barkers might cease from barking
+and the spielers spiel no more&mdash;until the
+morrow brought its fresh crowd of amusement
+seekers, and the Proprietor led the way
+into the Arena. Brandu and his two native
+assistants were carrying the boxes which
+contained the snakes into the big exhibition<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[72]</a></span>
+cage, and, when the three men joined them,
+the weirdness of the surroundings made a
+profound impression upon the Stranger.
+All of the lights in the Arena were extinguished,
+with the exception of the small
+cluster directly over their heads, and pairs of
+luminous spots from the great semicircle of
+cages at the outer edge of the building reminded
+him that the human beings in the
+cage were not the only interested spectators
+of the proceedings.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 649px;"><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71"></a>
+<img src="images/014.png" width="649" height="401" alt="" title="" />
+"A procession of sandwich men."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>The assistants carefully removed the
+great boas and pythons from the boxes, laying
+them on the floor, where they crawled
+lazily about, their delicate forked tongues
+vibrating like streaks of red flame, while
+Brandu removed a slat from a crate of rabbits
+and put a half-dozen of them on the
+floor. The little animals had no instinctive
+fear of the serpents, for they hopped about
+among them and over their wriggling bodies
+unconcernedly, but the snakes were hungry
+after a fast of two weeks and they wasted
+no time in getting to the business before
+them. The proceeding was the same in each<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[73]</a></span>
+case. A serpent would crawl up to the rabbit
+and place its nose, at which the little
+furry beast would sniff curiously, close to
+that of its prospective supper. The red
+forked tongue would pass rapidly over its
+face and the rabbit made no attempt to
+move. Whether it was the effect of some
+an&aelig;sthetic quality in the breath of the snake
+or the traditional charm of the serpent, it
+was hard to say, but the rabbit made no
+move to escape. Slowly but surely it yielded
+to the fascination of the snake, the large
+transparent ears dropped to the side of the
+head and the body muscles relaxed until the
+tickling of the serpent's tongue caused no
+reflex movement of the paws.</p>
+
+<p>The snake then carefully withdrew its
+head until the slim neck was in the form of
+a letter S, and when it again straightened
+out it was with the force of a released steel
+spring and the aim of the flat head was unerring.
+The stroke was so rapid that it was
+difficult for the eye to follow and the rabbit
+never knew what happened, for its body
+made a quick circle in the air and in less than<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[74]</a></span>
+a second all that was to be seen was one small
+paw protruding from the coiled body which
+had brought it a quick and merciful death.
+The jaws of the serpent have seized it by the
+snout and thrown it back into its coils and
+the first pressure kills it, although the ever
+tightening embrace continues until the bones
+are crushed within the unbroken skin, so that
+it can be easily swallowed.</p>
+
+<p>It is not swallowing in the ordinary sense
+of the word, for the snakes pull themselves
+over the rabbits as a glove is pulled over the
+finger, and the progress to the stomach can
+be watched through the length of the
+snake's neck. The snakes which were too
+small to manage a rabbit were fed on white
+rats and mice, but the process was the same
+in each case, except that the Hindoos held
+the rodents by their tails until the snakes
+had hypnotized them.</p>
+
+<p>"I suppose that this seems cruel to people
+because the rabbits are such harmless little
+beasts," said the Proprietor as the last bit
+of fur disappeared. "To my mind it is not
+half so cruel as hunting hares with guns and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[76]</a></span>
+dogs, for death from the snake's blow is as
+quick and painless as that from a bullet, and
+there are no maimed and wounded animals
+to drag themselves away to lingering deaths
+in hiding. But now I will show you something
+which has never been known in this
+country."</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 328px;"><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75"></a>
+<img src="images/015.png" width="328" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Brought the head of the cobra close to his face."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>One of the natives brought out a curiously
+woven circular basket which he handled
+with great care, and setting it in the
+middle of the cage retired to a respectful
+distance. Brandu crouched on the floor beside
+it, and, although the performance was
+not accompanied by the weird Oriental
+music which signaled the public appearances
+of the snake charmer, the tense expression
+of his face and the uncanniness of the surroundings
+made it sufficiently impressive,
+for he was about to handle the cobra de
+capello, the most venomous snake in all the
+great collection. He wasted no time in the
+pantomime and incantation of the ring performance,
+but quickly threw off the cover,
+and when the hooded head arose swaying
+above the edge of the basket, he started a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[77]</a></span>
+low whistling and passed his slim brown
+hands with lightning rapidity above it. He
+was absolutely fearless, but the task before
+him demanded the concentration of all his
+thoughts and he seemed unconscious of the
+startling interruption of a fight between
+two of the lions, and the shouts and pistol-shots
+of the keepers who separated them.</p>
+
+<p>He never removed his gaze from the head
+of the serpent and his hands moved so rapidly
+that they were almost invisible until,
+quicker than a snake could strike, one of
+them darted down and caught the slim neck
+behind the distended hood. He gave a
+sharp exclamation of triumph and sprang
+to his feet, the cobra coiling its body about
+his bare brown arm and giving every indication
+of rage.</p>
+
+<p>"I am always glad when that part of the
+performance is over," said the Proprietor
+with a sigh of relief. "Of course, it is all in
+the day's work with Brandu and he has done
+it thousands of times, but some day he will
+be a fraction of a second too slow and then&mdash;well,
+I shall have to get another snake<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[78]</a></span>
+charmer. Watch him now and you will see
+something which only the men of his caste
+can do."</p>
+
+<p>Brandu's white teeth glistened as he
+smiled at the Proprietor and pointed first to
+his own eyes and then to those of the serpent.
+He brought the head of the cobra
+close to his face, his expression became fixed
+and stern and the pupils of his widely
+opened eyes, which had been dilated until
+the iris was but a narrow rim, contracted to
+the size of pin heads. The cobra gazed at
+him fixedly and the tense body slowly uncoiled
+from his arm and hung limp and motionless,
+and Brandu laid it on the floor as
+lifeless and inert as a piece of rope. One of
+his assistants handed him a glass containing
+a couple of raw eggs and, handling it as
+carelessly as if it were a harmless garter
+snake, he picked up the cobra and forced a
+tube of polished bamboo between its jaws.
+When he had poured the eggs through the
+tube he withdrew it and carefully replaced
+the snake in the basket, still apparently lifeless;
+but bending over he blew sharply into<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[80]</a></span>
+its face and the cobra was instantly reanimated
+into five feet of viciousness. Its head
+reared up above the edge, the spectacled
+hood distended in anger, but Brandu
+quickly clapped on the cover and the snake
+feeding was finished for two weeks.</p>
+
+
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 303px;"><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79"></a>
+<img src="images/016.png" width="303" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"You're a blame fine figure of a fat man."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"That is a great performance of Brandu's,"
+said the Press Agent, "but it profits
+us nothing because the best part of it cannot
+be shown to the public. I never see a
+snake fed without thinking of something
+which happened when I was running a side
+show with the Greatest Show on Earth.</p>
+
+<p>"You know that the dime museum business
+was run to death while the craze lasted
+in this country, and freaks got so common
+that you couldn't throw a stone in the streets
+of any large city without hitting one of 'em.
+When the fickle public tired of giving up
+its dimes to see 'em, a guy named Merritt
+and myself had a choice collection on hand,
+and we went on the road with the big show
+for the summer, thinking perhaps our business
+would pick up in the fall. Our two
+great attractions were the biggest boa-constrictor<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[81]</a></span>
+in captivity, which we called 'Jointless
+Jake,' and the heaviest fat man in the
+world. That snake was about two hundred
+feet long, and while the fat man wasn't
+much on length, he held the record for belt
+measurement. Nine hundred and twenty-seven
+pounds he weighed, as we demonstrated
+on our own scales at every performance.
+Their feed bill was quite an item, as
+the snake took a half-dozen sheep every two
+weeks and the fat man, who was billed as
+'Signor Adipose Avoirdupois'&mdash;Merritt invented
+that&mdash;needed about a side of beef
+every day.</p>
+
+<p>"Freaks are a jealous lot and as hard to
+manage as rival prima donnas, and these
+two monstrosities came to hate each other
+like poison. They were in different lines,
+but you may have noticed that the side show
+'professor' uses up most of the superlatives
+in the English language when he gives his
+lecture, and each of 'em seemed afraid that
+the other would get some of his share of the
+dictionary. Adipose used to look at Jake's
+coiled body as if he would like to sit on it<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[82]</a></span>
+and flatten it out, and the snake would return
+the glance with a naughty little twinkle
+in its eye, as if he was estimating how much
+it would have to stretch its skin to accommodate
+A. A. in its interior, until it made Merritt
+anxious about 'em.</p>
+
+<p>"'That blame fat fool will waste away
+and spoil his shape, if he don't stop worrying,'
+he says, and he cuts a lot of his talk out
+of the description of the snake and uses the
+words on Adipose. Maybe you think
+snakes are stupid, but they aren't, and the
+boa got the hump and refused to uncoil himself
+to show his length unless he got his full
+share of the spiel. It cheered Avoirdupois
+up, though, and when we moved to the next
+town he stood around to gloat over Jake
+when he was being moved from the traveling
+box to the exhibition cage. The snake
+hadn't been fed for ten days and he was
+good and lively as well as being out of temper,
+so when he caught sight of the Signor
+he scattered the boys with one flip of his
+tail and went for him.</p>
+
+<p>"I've heard of bear hugs, but I never saw<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[83]</a></span>
+such a squeezing as that boa gave poor Adipose.
+It was a long way around him, but
+the snake made about a dozen wraps and all
+we could see of the fat man was a pair of
+feet sticking out at one end of the coil and
+his face, which looked like a purple harvest
+moon, projecting from the other. Jake
+reaches out and gets hold of a tent peg with
+his tail, which gives him a purchase, and then
+he tightens up for fair and Adipose lets out
+a holler you could hear a mile.</p>
+
+<p>"Of course, we got busy with crowbars
+and jackscrews and tried to pry Jake off,
+but there was nothing doing and the harder
+we pried the closer he cinched up on Adipose.
+Merritt usually had a suggestion to
+make, so I looked at him and he was lost in
+thought, but in a minute he brightens up
+and calls for a rope.</p>
+
+<p>"'We can't pry the blame snake away
+from the man,' says he, as he tied the rope
+around the Signor's feet, 'so we'll try to
+pull the man away from the snake.' All
+hands fell to and pulled to beat four of
+a kind, but Jake just tightened up a bit<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[84]</a></span>
+and grinned and Adipose let out another
+holler.</p>
+
+<p>"'You need a traction engine on that
+rope,' says I when they gave it up as a bad
+job, and Merritt, who was looking a little
+discouraged, gave a whoop.</p>
+
+<p>"'Bring an elephant,' he yelled, and when
+one of the boys started off on a run for the
+menagerie, he called after him to 'make
+that order two elephants.' The Hathis came
+lumbering over, and Merritt tied the rope
+around the shoulders of one and put another
+rope around Jake's neck and the shoulders
+of the other elephant.</p>
+
+<p>"'Now pull, blame you!' says he, heading
+'em in different directions and giving one of
+'em a kick, and they put their shoulders
+against the ropes. It was a mighty interesting
+performance to every one but Adipose,
+who didn't seem to enjoy it at all, judging
+from the yells he let out. Jake was having
+the time of his life, and the harder the elephants
+pulled the tighter he squeezed the
+Signor, and when he felt that they were getting
+the better of him he made a supreme<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[85]</a></span>
+effort which kinked up every muscle in his
+body. But there was no holding on against
+those brutes, and pretty soon the fat man
+commenced to slip out from the coils, feet
+first. It was a queer thing to watch and his
+legs stretched so that I thought his knees
+would never come into sight. His legs had
+been about the size of barrels when the snake
+grabbed him, but between the stretching and
+the squeezing they were now three times as
+long and about as large as broomsticks. He
+weighed as much as ever when the elephants
+finally got him out, but the flesh was distributed
+differently and instead of being six
+feet tall and twelve feet around, he was
+twelve feet long and built in proportion.
+The snake was up against it, too, for he had
+cramped himself so with that last squeeze
+that he couldn't straighten out the kinks,
+and he kept in the same shape as when he
+was wrapped around the Signor. We tried
+to straighten him out, but it was no use; he
+just stayed coiled up like a spring and the
+boys rolled him around as if he were a
+barrel.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[86]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"Merritt had kept cheerful as long as
+there was anything to be done, but tears
+came to his eyes when he looked at Adipose.
+The Signor was standing up, gazing at his
+feet, which he hadn't seen before in twenty
+years, and Merritt looked up at him and
+freed his mind.</p>
+
+<p>"'You're a blame fine figure of a fat man,
+aren't you, now?' says he. 'Just on account
+of your confounded professional jealousy
+we lose our two star attractions, for that
+blamed snake is so kinked up that he isn't
+good for anything except to cut up into
+barrel hoops.'</p>
+
+<p>"The Signor was ashamed of himself and
+hadn't a word to say, so he just kept quiet
+and tried to get used to his new shape and
+taking a bird's-eye view of things. Merritt
+and I were feeling pretty blue when
+along comes Tody Hamilton, the circus
+press agent, and as soon as he saw what
+had happened he made a run for a trolley
+car.</p>
+
+<p>"'Don't let 'em get away!' he yelled back
+over his shoulder. 'This is the biggest scoop<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[88]</a></span>
+on record and I'm off for the printing-office.'</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87"></a>
+<img src="images/017.png" width="650" height="254" alt="" title="" />
+"Jake was having the time of his life, and the harder the elephants pulled the tighter he squeezed the Signor."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"'It'll make a good newspaper story, all
+right; but where do we come in on it?' says
+Merritt, looking mournfully at Adipose.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, a couple of hours later I had to go
+into the city to order some new togs for the
+Signor, who looked as if he were dressed in
+a particularly baggy bathing suit since he
+had been stretched out, and the first thing
+I saw was a procession of sandwich men
+marching down the street. The ink wasn't
+dry on the posters, but Tody had been busy,
+and there in flaming red letters was the announcement&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">JUST ARRIVED AT THE<br />
+BIG SHOW!</p>
+<p class="center">DON'T MISS SEEING THEM!!!</p>
+<p class="center">LENGTHY LOUIS, THE TALLEST<br />
+MAN IN THE UNIVERSE!!!</p>
+<p class="center">CIRCULAR SAM, THE MOST GIGANTIC<br />
+HOOP SNAKE EVER CAPTURED!!!</p>
+
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[89]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE<br />
+AND THE<br />
+INCONSIDERATE PYTHON</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[91]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE<br />
+AND THE<br />
+INCONSIDERATE PYTHON</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">The</span> conventional skirt dance has long
+ceased to be a novelty on the vaudeville
+stage, but as it is performed by
+"La Belle Selica" in the Arena at Dreamland
+it holds the interest of that most
+exacting audience&mdash;a crowd of Coney
+Island pleasure seekers. It is not because
+Selica is pre-eminent among dancers, but on
+account of the unusual and dangerous stage
+setting; for she performs in the large exhibition
+cage, surrounded by a half dozen lionesses,
+each animal seated on a separate pedestal.
+Any one of the huge beasts could
+crush the dancer with a single blow of a
+massive paw, and the great jaws which snap
+viciously at her tiny feet as she kicks them
+before their faces are sufficiently powerful
+to crush the shin-bone of an ox.</p>
+
+<p>She is apparently without fear of them,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[92]</a></span>
+for she dances gracefully from one to the
+other, flicking them across their faces with
+the light switch which she carries for her
+only protection, and kicking over their
+heads and into their very mouths, always
+missing the answering snap of the jaws by
+the fraction of an inch, and acknowledging
+it with a smile as she whirls away to repeat
+the performance before another pedestal.
+The lionesses see the performance many
+times in the course of a season, but they
+never lose interest in it and they do not remove
+their eyes from Selica from the time
+she enters the cage until she drives them out
+before her. So long as she is on her feet and
+agile enough to escape the swift stroke of a
+paw or the snapping jaws, she is safe; for
+a lioness would not jump at her from a
+pedestal; but there is always the chance of a
+slip or a false step and then&mdash;&mdash;!!!</p>
+
+<p>It happened once, and caused a suspension
+of Selica's performance for two months
+during the Pan-American Exposition at
+Buffalo, for Grace, the largest lioness, was
+on her before she could recover herself; and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[93]</a></span>
+it required the efforts of Bostock and all of
+his trainers to beat back the beasts who were
+maddened by the sight and smell of blood
+and to rescue the unconscious woman from
+the cage. They have never forgotten that
+moment of rebellion which was so nearly
+successful, and they are ever watchful for
+another opportunity to avenge the many<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[94]</a></span>
+cuts of the training whip which they received
+in the course of their schooling. But
+Selica is also watchful, and although Grace
+had latterly done nothing particularly out
+of the way, the wonderful sixth sense which
+experienced trainers always acquire warned
+her that the animal should be regarded with
+suspicion. The beast had become nervous;
+a little more sullen than usual when ordered
+to leave her den for the exhibition cage, and
+a trifle slow and rebellious when told to
+jump up on her allotted pedestal.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 583px;"><a name="Now_if_youll_kindly_give_me_your_attention" id="Now_if_youll_kindly_give_me_your_attention"></a>
+<img src="images/018.png" width="583" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Now, if you'll kindly give me your attention."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>Constant association with the wild animals
+begets carelessness but Selica, with the
+scars of Grace's sharp claws still visible on
+her back and shoulders, was quick to notice
+the change and especially careful, before
+opening the door from the den to the runway,
+to look through the observation hole
+and make sure that the lioness was not
+crouched for a spring. Grace had been particularly
+sullen in the afternoon and she was
+growling ominously when Selica went to
+get her for the evening performance, but
+when the woman saw the three little furry<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[95]</a></span>
+balls which were huddled in a corner of the
+den she understood and forgave all. The
+cubs were no larger than St. Bernard puppies,
+but Grace apparently considered them
+worth fighting for; and Selica's dance was
+given that night with only five lionesses in
+the cage, and the Proprietor told the
+Stranger the reason for the empty pedestal.</p>
+
+<p>"Wait until after the performance and I
+will take them out of the cage and show
+them to you," he said; and the Stranger, remembering
+a tradition to the effect that
+robbing a lioness of her cubs is a dangerous
+feat, looked forward with a great deal of
+interest to the after-piece.</p>
+
+<p>"We can't trust the rearing of the cubs to
+Grace," said the Proprietor, as he stood in
+front of her cage after the audience had
+been dismissed. "The close proximity of
+the other animals in the Arena and the curiosity
+of the thousands of people who come
+here every day would make her so crazy that
+she would destroy them, so I must get them
+a foster mother. I have sent to New York
+for a bitch with pups, and in a couple of days<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[96]</a></span>
+I will show you a happy family." The cubs
+were in the center of the cage and Grace
+stood over them, snarling and looking with
+blazing eyes at the group in front of it; but
+Selica's voice from the runway and a rattling
+of the door at the back distracted her
+attention, and as she sprang at the door the
+Proprietor darted a hand between the bars
+and seized one of the cubs, drawing it safely
+out a half second before the enraged mother
+landed against the bars with a force which
+made them rattle.</p>
+
+<p>The poor beast was almost frantic, but
+the same maneuver was twice repeated, and
+in spite of her fierce attacks on doors and
+bars the Proprietor, who had acquired
+through his lifetime association with the
+great cats as much of their quickness of
+movement as it is given to mere man to
+learn, removed the three cubs without receiving
+a scratch.</p>
+
+<p>Poor helpless little creatures they were,
+and it was difficult to realize that they would
+soon grow into beasts as powerful as the
+ferocious Baltimore, the terror of trainers,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[97]</a></span>
+who was answering Grace's lamentations
+with roars which fairly shook the building,
+from his cage on the other side of the
+Arena.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 410px;"><a name="Looked_like_the_pennant_of_a_man-o-war" id="Looked_like_the_pennant_of_a_man-o-war"></a>
+<img src="images/019.png" width="410" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Looked like the pennant of a man-o'-war."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"That animal was bred in captivity, born
+and raised in our menagerie in England,"
+said the Proprietor after he had placed the
+cubs in charge of one of the keepers. "I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[98]</a></span>
+suppose that's what makes him such a bad
+beggar to handle. Give me the jungle-bred
+lion to train, every time, for after the manhandling
+and discomfort of his capture and
+transportation to the coast by the natives,
+he appreciates the care and humanity of a
+civilized trainer. These cubs which are
+raised in captivity are always played with
+and teased by the employees and visitors,
+and their first knowledge of their strength
+comes to them accidentally when they hurt
+a man without meaning to do it; but they
+soon learn to connect cause and effect, and
+then it is time to watch out for 'em. A
+jungle-bred lion is pretty much cock o' the
+walk until he is snared or trapped, and in his
+first experience with men he is vanquished
+and realizes how useless is his great strength
+against the nets and ropes which entangle
+him. The cub born in captivity is familiar
+with men from the first, and plays with them
+like a kitten until one day he is out of sorts
+or is accidentally hurt in a frolic and the
+swift cut of his razor-like claws makes his
+playmate or tormentor drop him and leave<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[99]</a></span>
+him in peace. That makes it hard for the
+trainer when he takes him in hand, for although
+the cub may be subdued, he remembers
+that he was once victorious and watches
+his chance. Jack Bonavita, the greatest
+trainer who ever went into a lion's cage,
+would have two good arms to-day if Baltimore
+had been born in the Nubian desert
+instead of in Manchester."</p>
+
+<p>They stood in front of Baltimore's cage
+for a moment, admiring the swelling muscles
+of the great beast as he sprang from
+side to side, shaking his shaggy mane and
+roaring defiance at the world, and then
+turned to go to the white-topped table in
+front of the Arena. In the doorway they
+met the Press Agent, looking anything but
+cheerful and muttering maledictions on the
+heads of all city editors. The Proprietor
+told him of the new arrivals in the Arena,
+and suggested sending the announcement
+of the birth to the papers.</p>
+
+<p>"A fat chance I'd stand of having it
+printed," he grumbled. "Here I've worked
+half the season and never given 'em a story<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[100]</a></span>
+that wasn't pretty nearly true, and to-day
+when I take them that account of Morelli
+and the jaguar they turn me down and
+holler 'fake.' Let me take one of those cubs
+and stripe it over with a little black paint,
+and to-morrow morning every newspaper in
+New York will have a photographer down
+here to take pictures of 'the only hybrid
+lion-tiger cub ever born,' and all of the space
+jerkers will be buttonholing me for a three
+column, front page story."</p>
+
+<p>The arrival of the waiter with soothing
+beverages soon brought back the customary
+smile to his genial face and the Proprietor's
+suggestion that perhaps he had embroidered
+some of the stories just a trifle, aroused only
+a good-natured protest.</p>
+
+<p>"The worst thing about the press agent's
+profession is that he has to risk his eternal
+salvation by making up plausible lies to satisfy
+the newspapers when he could give 'em
+better stories which are actually true if they
+would take 'em on his say so," he said, as he
+wiped the froth from his mustache. "I remember
+once when a guy named Merritt<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[102]</a></span>
+and myself were running a snake show in
+New York that we couldn't pay the rent
+because the papers wouldn't give us any
+publicity, although we had the finest collection
+of wrigglers that was ever gotten together.
+We were running it on the dead
+level, nary a fake about it, and Merritt's lecture
+was highly instructive and interesting
+and more than half true; but we saw that
+we couldn't win out at the game unless we
+crooked it. We were running so far behind
+that the only thing which saved us from a
+dispossess was the fact that they couldn't
+get a constable who would carry the snakes
+out to the sidewalk; but Merritt was a resourceful
+cuss and I felt confident that he
+would figure out some scheme to win out.</p>
+
+
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 428px;"><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101"></a>
+<img src="images/020.png" width="428" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Kicking over their heads and into their very mouths."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says he, 'it's necessary for us to
+give 'em a sensation. We've tried to run
+this game as a purely moral and instructive
+entertainment, but we need the money and
+I reckon we've got to spring a cold deck on
+'em. I guess you've got to stand for being
+attacked by an untamable, man-eating
+python.'<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[103]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"'You can count me out on that,' says I.
+'Every paper in the city would write me up
+as a victim of the demon Rum.' Merritt
+looked discouraged for a minute, but his
+face suddenly lighted up and I knew he had
+found a way.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says he, 'if we only take half of
+our usual allowance of fire-water to-night
+we will have enough cash to buy some paint.
+Now there's that big white python; the only
+specimen ever captured, the "pythonatus
+fluidum lactalis giganticus,"' says he. That
+was one trouble with Merritt; he'd get so
+stuck on the language which he manufactured
+that he couldn't leave it out, even in
+our business consultations, and it used up
+a lot of time. 'That python is the straight
+goods,' says he, 'but he doesn't catch their
+eyes, so I'll paint the blame snake red, white
+and blue and christen him the "anacondus
+flagelum americanibus e pluribus unum,"
+and give the reporters something to work
+on,' says he. 'That'll work up the snakologists
+and set 'em writing in the papers to
+prove that there isn't any such thing; but<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[104]</a></span>
+we've got the answer to that, for we can
+show 'em one at twenty-five cents per.'</p>
+
+<p>"I never could stand for flim-flamming
+the generous public, but my meal ticket was
+punched so full of holes that it looked like
+a porous plaster, and I consented. Merritt
+spent most of the night decorating that
+python, and in the morning it looked like
+the pennant of a man-o'-war. I had to sit
+up and watch him, for he had the artistic
+temperament, and he was so carried away by
+his enthusiasm that if I hadn't restrained
+him he would have put on the coat-of-arms
+of the United States, eagle, motto and all.</p>
+
+<p>"'Now,' says he, when he had finished and
+stepped back to admire his work, 'if that
+blame snake's own mother would know him
+if she met him on the street, I'm a Dutchman.
+If this don't make 'em sit up and take
+notice, then I'll go to night school to learn
+the show business.'"</p>
+
+<p>"How did the scheme work?" asked the
+Proprietor, as the Press Agent paused to
+make the grand hailing sign of distress to
+the waiter.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[105]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"Work!" he answered. "How does a
+fake always work in New York? Why,
+P. T. Barnum had the mold for his petrified
+man made from the legs of one man and the
+body of another, and he didn't even take the
+trouble to smooth off the ridges where the
+edges met when he cast it in Portland
+cement. But that didn't prevent all of the
+scientific sharps who inspected it from certifying
+to its genuineness. His mermaid was
+manufactured from a codfish skin and a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[106]</a></span>
+stuffed monkey; but the public stood for
+that, too, and he made a fortune out of 'em.
+Maybe you can't fool all of the people all of
+the time, but you can fool most of 'em most
+of the time; especially if they live in little
+old New York. Of course, we didn't pull
+off such a success as Barnum did; but we
+had no kick coming when we counted up the
+receipts for the next week. Merritt's lecture
+was a work of art and he manufactured
+language at a rate which would have given
+Noah Webster nervous prostration when he
+christened the python 'Old Glory,' and told
+about its combining the venomous qualities
+of the cobra and the strength of the boa-constrictor.
+The python was so stuck on
+its new colors that it nearly broke its neck
+turning around to admire itself and everything
+went lovely. Of course, there was the
+usual howl from the snakologists who knew
+it all, and 'Old Subscriber,' 'Citizen,' 'Pro
+Bono Publico' and the rest of the bunch
+wrote columns to the newspapers, denouncing
+us as frauds.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 530px;"><a name="Grace_snarled_over_the_cubs" id="Grace_snarled_over_the_cubs"></a>
+<img src="images/021.png" width="530" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+Grace snarled over the cubs.</div>
+
+<p>"You know how those things work;<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[107]</a></span>
+everybody puts up an argument and then
+it's up to the fellow who is making the bluff
+to back it up with an offer to donate a sum
+of money to some charitable institution if
+he can't deliver the goods. We were well
+ahead of the game as a result of the advertising
+and had about two thousand to the
+good and Merritt got awful chesty. He
+had lied about that snake so much that he
+believed in it himself and it made me a little
+nervous one night when he offered to donate
+two thousand dollars to the 'Home for Decrepit
+Side Show Fakirs' if any one could
+produce another specimen like this one,
+short of the head waters of the Amazon. I
+wasn't scared so much by that as by what I
+feared he might say, for I knew they
+couldn't get another if they raked the universe
+with a fine-tooth comb, and sure
+enough, he was carried away by his enthusiasm
+and offered to bet our entire bank roll
+that the snake was a genuine 'American
+flag', such as had never been exhibited in
+any country.</p>
+
+<p>"It was just our luck that there was a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[108]</a></span>
+half-loaded tin-horn gambler in the audience
+that night; one of the kind that wears
+a yellow diamond and a checked suit with
+a white stove-pipe hat; and the only part of
+the speech that he understood was that
+somebody wanted to make a bet. That
+raised his sporting blood, and he climbed
+up to the platform and pulled out a roll of
+yellow boys that would choke a dog and
+peeled off twenty centuries.</p>
+
+<p>"'I don't know much about snakes which
+bromide won't make chase themselves back
+to the woods,' says he as he plunked 'em
+down on the table. 'I ain't got your gift of
+gab, but money talks and I've got this pile
+to say that you can't tell the truth to save
+your neck. Just stack up your pile alongside
+of that and then trot out your snakelet.'
+I was feeling pretty sore on Merritt for
+making such a bluff, but, of course, we had
+to make good and between us we covered the
+bet. We had glass cages full of snakes all
+around the platform, but 'Old Glory' was
+in a big chest covered with gilt figures
+and brass chains and fastened with a padlock.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[109]</a></span>
+Merritt was mad clear through at
+having his veracity questioned, but he looked
+pretty confident as he stuck the key in the
+lock.</p>
+
+<p>"'It's a shame to take the money,' says he,
+as he eyed the gambler, 'but there's an old
+saying about the mental capacity of a man
+that is speedily separated from his bank roll,
+and I reckon you were away from home the
+last time the fool killer called.' The gam
+just smiled and kept his eye on the stakes,
+and Merritt gives the chains a rattle to wake
+up 'Old Glory' and throws back the lid of
+the chest.</p>
+
+<p>"'Now,' says he, turning to the audience,
+'if you'll kindly give me your attention I'll
+show you one of the most marvelous mysteries
+of Nature. It was procured by one
+of our special agents at the head waters of
+the Amazon at tremendous expense. It is
+a unique representative of the reptilian
+family and the sight of it should arouse
+pride in the hearts of all patriotic Americans;
+for as he unwinds his sinuous coils you
+will observe that while his head and neck<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[110]</a></span>
+are blue, the body, down to the tip of the
+tail, is marked with thirteen alternate stripes
+of red and white, giving this marvelous creature
+the appearance of being wrapped in
+that glorious emblem of liberty which waves
+over the land of the brave and the home of
+the free.' Merritt stops then, throwing out
+his chest and sticking his hand into the
+bosom of his coat to wait for the customary
+applause from the gallery to subside; but
+instead of the usual glad hands he was
+greeted with a roar of laughter and cat-calls
+and when he turned to look at the
+snake box, there was 'Old Glory' crawling
+out, looking ashamed of himself, for he was
+as white as the day he was born."</p>
+
+<p>"What happened?" asked the Proprietor
+as the Press Agent sighed.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, Merritt always had presence of
+mind, and as the sport gathered up our hard
+earned shekels he grabbed me by the arm
+and hurried me from the building. He
+knew that a Bowery audience was apt to
+follow cat-calls with antique eggs and vegetables
+of last season's vintage, and five minutes<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[111]</a></span>
+later we were trying to drown our
+sorrow.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says Merritt, 'I made a big mistake,
+for I should have tattooed him. His
+beauty was only skin deep and the blame
+snake shed his skin.'"</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[113]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE ANIMAL BAROMETER<br />
+AND<br />
+THE ETERNAL FEMININE</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[115]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE ANIMAL BAROMETER<br />
+AND<br />
+THE ETERNAL FEMININE</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Uncle Sam</span> spends a large
+amount of money to forecast the
+weather twenty-four hours in advance,
+and the farmers and seafaring
+folk watch the bulletins no more eagerly
+than do the owners of the many shows
+whose harvest time is the brief summer
+season at Coney Island. Bad weather,
+especially if it comes on the first or last day
+of the week or a legal holiday, means a loss
+of hundreds of dollars to them, for if the
+skies are threatening, the holiday makers
+seek their pleasures nearer home and there
+are fewer people to give up their dimes and
+quarters under the seductive wheedling of
+the "barkers." Most of the show people
+look anxiously at the sky before retiring for
+the night, but there is one of them who finds
+an absolutely reliable forecast within the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_116" id="Page_116">[116]</a></span>
+walls of his own building. Perhaps the
+signs and portents could not be translated
+by the weather clerk, but the Proprietor of
+the trained animal exhibition at Dreamland
+has been all of his life the companion of
+his charges, and has learned to recognize the
+meaning of unusual behavior or the shade of
+change in their voices which indicates an approaching
+storm.</p>
+
+<p>There was not a cloud to be seen, and
+every star in the heavens was trying to rival
+the brilliant electric lights on the great
+tower as he sat at the caf&eacute; table in front of
+the Arena with the Stranger and the Press
+Agent after the night's performance was
+over, but he gave an exclamation of disappointment
+as a half-smothered roar came
+from the throat of one of the lions in the
+building.</p>
+
+<p>"Rain to-morrow!" he said as the grumbling
+roar spread from cage to cage about
+the great semicircle. His companions
+smiled incredulously as they looked at the
+cloudless sky, but he repeated his prediction
+when the Stranger read "Fair and warmer<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[117]</a></span>
+to-morrow" from one of the evening papers.
+"I know all about the 'high and low pressure
+areas,'" he said, as he glanced at the chart.
+"A man in the show business has to study
+everything which may influence the attendance,
+but the behavior of my animals is a
+better barometer for local conditions than
+any aneroid which the Weather Bureau
+owns. In spite of the clear sky and the
+official predictions, I would wager that we
+shall have a bad storm within the next
+twenty-four hours, for those lions have the
+inherited knowledge of hundreds of generations
+of jungle-bred ancestors whose food
+supply depended largely upon the weather
+conditions."</p>
+
+<p>"Do the other animals possess the same
+barometric accomplishments?" asked the
+Stranger skeptically, and the Proprietor
+laughed as he invited him to come inside and
+judge for himself. The Arena was always
+an uncanny place at night, for in the dim
+light only the glowing eyes of the animals
+could be distinguished in the cages, and the
+snarls and growls which came from behind<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[118]</a></span>
+the gratings conjured up visions of what
+might happen if one of the animals were
+loose and crouching on the seats of the auditorium
+or in the galleries, waiting for a meal
+of human flesh; but to-night it was worse
+than usual, for the unwonted restlessness of
+the animals was apparent even to the untrained
+senses of the Stranger.</p>
+
+<p>The carnivora in captivity retain the
+habits of their relatives of the jungle and
+are more alert at night than in the daytime,
+but following a hard day's work in the exhibition
+cage they usually settle down for a
+few hours of sleep after receiving their
+evening allowance of meat. Although it
+was long past their resting time, not an eye
+was closed, and hundreds of pairs of bright
+spots were visible in the darkness as the
+beasts paced uneasily from end to end of
+their narrow dens. The elephants, whose
+arduous duties in the ring and on the ballyhoo
+brought such leg weariness that they
+were usually glad to be shackled for the
+night, were swaying their huge bodies from
+side to side and straining at the stout chains<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[120]</a></span>
+which fastened them and the shrill trumpeting
+of Tom, the largest one, was echoed and
+repeated by his companions, Roger and
+Alice. The roaring of the lions and the
+snarling of the tigers was mocked by the
+hideous laugh of the hyenas, and the discord
+of the strange noises was so disagreeable
+that the Stranger was relieved when they
+left the Arena and returned to the comparative
+quiet of the white-topped table.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119"></a>
+<img src="images/022.png" width="650" height="439" alt="" title="" />
+"Every one of the great beasts jumped for her."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"It will be a severe storm," said the Proprietor
+as the waiter took their orders.
+"Any impending change makes them uneasy,
+but when every animal in the menagerie
+is in the state of excitement which you
+noticed to-night you can be assured that it
+means a very decided disturbance. It is a
+thing which animal trainers are ever watchful
+about, for most of the training is done
+at night, and it is not safe to work with them
+when they are in that frame of mind."</p>
+
+<p>"But you give your advertised performances
+just the same," said the Press Agent.</p>
+
+<p>"That's a different matter," answered the
+Proprietor. "When the Arena is lighted up<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[121]</a></span>
+and filled with people, the attention of the
+animals is distracted and they forget their
+nervousness, but a rehearsal at night is a
+lonesome proceeding, at best, and as the
+trainer devotes his attention to a single animal
+at a time it leaves the others free to
+think up mischief or to give way to their
+unreasoning fear. I had that borne in upon
+me in a way I shall never forget a few years
+ago when I was a younger hand at the business.
+I knew a good deal about handling
+animals, but not as much about managing
+men as I have learned since, and I used to
+forget that giving an order was not the same
+thing as seeing that it was executed. There
+was a trainer named Barton in my employ
+who did a pretty fair act with a group of six
+lions, but he was a brutal sort of a chap and
+punished his animals so severely that they
+went through their performance on the
+jump so as to get out of the exhibition cage,
+where blows were more plentiful than kind
+words. His act was a winner, all right, for
+he was absolutely fearless and the animals
+put up a bluff of snarling and snapping<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[122]</a></span>
+which made it exciting, but I disliked the
+man so much that I was glad to farm him
+out for a ten weeks' engagement on the
+vaudeville circuit.</p>
+
+<p>"He wasn't a bad-looking chap and when
+he came back from his tour he brought with
+him one of the most beautiful women I have
+ever seen. She was an Egyptian who had
+been brought to this country with a troupe
+of dancers for one of the big exhibitions, and
+he met her and married her when they were
+performing in the same theater. Of course,
+I had absolutely no use for an Egyptian
+dancer with my show and I made the marriage
+an excuse to get rid of Barton; but he
+begged me to keep him on the plea that he
+was teaching her to do his act with the lions.
+She was so beautiful that I realized that she
+would be a great drawing card if she developed
+into a good trainer, so I consented and
+signed a contract with him for another year.
+I regretted it when I saw the first rehearsal,
+for it was painfully evident that she went
+into the cage only because she was more
+afraid of her husband than she was of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[124]</a></span>
+lions, and I didn't blame her; for while I
+might interfere to prevent ill-treatment of
+the lions, which were my property, I had no
+authority to protect her from his cruelty.
+They did most of the rehearsing at night,
+and I trusted to the fear which Barton had
+instilled in the lions to keep them from attacking
+her, for he always stood at the bars
+and they would cower down at the sound of
+his voice. You know it is never safe for
+two people to be in the cage with a group of
+animals at the same time unless they stand
+back to back and keep in one place, for if
+they are moving about an animal may run
+into one while endeavoring to escape from
+the other, and even the blow from a lion's
+tail might knock a man from his feet and
+then there would be trouble.</p>
+
+
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123"></a>
+<img src="images/023.png" width="650" height="475" alt="" title="" />
+"Jim," says Merritt, ... "there is a great advantage in having a squaw for the top part of that there fish."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Poor little Leotta used to go into the
+cage and try to keep the tell-tale tremble out
+of her voice when she gave her commands,
+but she could never learn to concentrate her
+whole attention on the animals and give up
+looking for a sign of approval from Barton
+out of the corner of her eye. I made it a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[125]</a></span>
+point to see that there was always plenty
+of assistance near in case of accidents, and
+gave Barton strict orders to keep her out of
+the cage when the animals were under the
+influence of 'weather fear.' It was difficult
+for me to instruct or warn Leotta, for she
+understood English very little; but I helped
+her all I could, and gave her husband to understand
+that I would not allow any ill-treatment.</p>
+
+<p>"In spite of all my precautions, I was
+always uneasy when she was in the cage, and
+when I had to be away from the show she
+was constantly in my mind. I had to go to
+the wharf one afternoon to superintend the
+unloading of a new lot of animals which had
+been sent from our English quarters, and
+owing to delays at the custom house it was
+late at night before I could start back for
+the show. Perhaps I had absorbed some of
+the weather wisdom of the animals from
+long association with them, but, at any rate,
+I was uneasy at the delays and as I whizzed
+along in the trolley I congratulated myself
+on my foresight in having warned Barton,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[126]</a></span>
+as the thunder heads were gathering and I
+knew the animals would have the jumps and
+be unsafe to work with. But my heart sank
+as I drew near the building and saw that it
+was brilliantly lighted up, for that could
+only mean one thing at that time of night&mdash;Leotta
+must be rehearsing. The trainers
+usually have but one small cluster of lights,
+but I had ordered the electrician to turn on
+all the switches when she was in the cage,
+as I thought she would be less frightened
+and the animals more tractable in the full
+light.</p>
+
+<p>"My guess was right: Barton, in disobedience
+of orders, had made her go into the
+cage, and he had taken advantage of my
+absence to break our iron-clad rule which
+forbids a trainer to drink. I saw the whole
+situation as soon as I entered the building,
+and I would have given the whole show to
+have the little woman safely on the right side
+of the bars. The animals in the dens were
+raising a worse row than they did to-night,
+and the lions in Leotta's group had forgotten
+their fear of the trainer in their greater<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[127]</a></span>
+fear of the approaching storm. They were
+ugly, and Barton, who was more than half-seas
+over, stood at the bars shouting abuse
+at his wife and the lions and jeering at her
+evident terror. I saw that the other trainers
+and keepers appreciated the danger, for
+they were gathered around, holding iron
+bars, Roman candles and pistols; but they
+had sense enough to know that any interference
+which would draw his attention from
+the cage would precipitate the trouble, and
+none of them could make Leotta appreciate
+the danger of her position. I went up to
+him quietly and told him that I thought he
+had better call the rehearsal off for the
+night, intending to square accounts with
+him as soon as Leotta was safely out of the
+cage; but the drink was in his brain and he
+turned on me and cursed me. Leotta gave
+a scream of terror as the brute turned his
+back on the cage and, as if by a preconcerted
+plan, every one of the six great
+beasts jumped for her.</p>
+
+<p>"Barton knew that the game was up, and
+in his drunken rage he attacked me and it<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[128]</a></span>
+kept my hands full to manage him; but the
+others rushed for the cage, and while Bonavita
+and Stevenson beat off the lions with
+the help of the keepers on the outside who
+were firing pistols and Roman candles and
+using fire-extinguishers through the bars,
+Bobby Mack picked up Leotta and carried
+her outside. Of course, that ended Leotta's
+career in the show business and finished
+Barton's employment with me. The poor
+little thing's beauty was gone, for a lion's
+claws make deep cuts, and it was many a
+day before she was able to leave the hospital.
+You can see that I have reason to be confident
+of the accuracy of the predictions of
+my weather bureau, for if there had been no
+thunderstorm brewing I might have developed
+a sensational lion act."</p>
+
+<p>"Or if Leotta had understood English,"
+commented the Press Agent, as he beckoned
+to the waiter. "Of course, it is sometimes an
+advantage to have performers who can't
+converse with the audience, but it is mighty
+inconvenient if they can't understand the
+orders of the boss. I lost the chance of making<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[130]</a></span>
+a lot of money once, because a squaw
+who was working for us couldn't understand
+the white man's lingo. A guy named
+Merritt and myself were disappointed about
+getting a concession for a snake show at the
+Pan-American Exposition, and we found
+ourselves broke in Buffalo, which is separated
+from the Bowery by about five hundred
+miles of very tough walking when you
+haven't got the price of a railway ticket.
+Merritt was mad clean through at being
+thrown down by the Exposition managers,
+but he was an inventive genius and I knew
+that he would figure out a way to raise the
+price of transportation.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 390px;"><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129"></a>
+<img src="images/024.png" width="390" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"A howl of terror from the platform."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says he as we counted up our
+available assets and found that they were
+pretty well along toward a minus quantity,
+'it makes me dead sore to be turned down
+this way without getting a run for our
+money, and it's up to us to increase our capital
+and incidentally give the bunch that
+done us dirt the double cross. Get your
+think tank working and see what it will produce.'
+I couldn't see a way out, but when<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[131]</a></span>
+a squaw from the Tonawanda Reservation,
+who was selling trailing arbutus, came up
+to us and offered us a nosegay, Merritt gives
+a whoop and claps me on the shoulder.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says he, 'I've got it and we'll
+make our everlasting fortunes!' He commenced
+to question the squaw, but all the
+English she knew was 'ten cent a bunch,'
+and he didn't make much headway until a
+big buck Injin who had been watching her
+from across the street came over and butted
+in. It appeared that he was her husband,
+and when Merritt stated his proposition the
+buck accepted the terms without the formality
+of consulting the squaw. When the
+Exposition opened we had a big tent on an
+open lot across from the main entrance,
+with a life-sized picture of 'The Marvelous
+Mermaid' as big as a house. As I remarked,
+Merritt was an inventive genius and he had
+worked up a scheme to deceive the confiding
+public. He had provided a platform
+and carefully cut out a hole so that the
+squaw could stand on the ground and the
+edges of the hole fitted snugly about her<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_132" id="Page_132">[132]</a></span>
+waist. He made her lean forward and rest
+her chin in her hands in the conventionally
+accepted mermaid position, and then he
+fitted a fish tail which lay along the top of
+the platform, and it was so skillfully joined
+to her that it looked as if it grew there. She
+was a good-looking squaw and she certainly
+played her part and made an interesting picture.</p>
+
+<p>"Of course, he couldn't explain to her
+what he wanted her to do, but he would tell
+the buck, who would carefully translate and
+impress the instructions upon her memory
+with the aid of a bale stick. The thing which
+he put most stress upon was that she was to
+remain absolutely still, no matter what happened.
+I sold the tickets and put up the
+spiel on the front, and Merritt lectured inside
+and we did a land-office business. Lots
+of smart guys came around and tried to get
+gay with the mermaid, but she couldn't understand
+their joshing and never cracked a
+smile. The blame tent caught fire one night
+when it was filled with people, and she had
+such a wholesome recollection of the bale<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[133]</a></span>
+stick that she kept as still as a cigar-store Indian
+until we had cleared the place and put
+the fire out.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says Merritt as he looked her over
+admiringly after that experience, 'there is a
+great advantage in having a squaw for the
+top part of that there fish. She can't understand
+what the Willie boys say to her and
+nothing feazes her. A white gal would have
+had hysterics and given the whole snap
+away.' It gave Merritt a lot more confidence
+and we felt pretty safe after that experience,
+and neglected to have the buck repeat
+his bale-stick admonitions to her upon
+the necessity of cultivating repose of manner.
+Everything was lovely and we were
+turning hundreds of people away and making
+more money than the big show. One
+afternoon we were playing to a record house
+and Merritt was doing himself proud on his
+lecture.</p>
+
+<p>"'Ladies and gentlemen,' says he, 'I have
+the honor to present to this intelligent audience
+a creature which is commonly, but erroneously,
+supposed to be extinct at the present<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[134]</a></span>
+day; but you have before you a living and
+convincing proof that mermaids still exist.
+I confess that until I was able to obtain this
+unique specimen, which was captured while
+basking in the sun and singing a love song
+upon an iceberg in the Antarctic Ocean, I
+shared the opinions of my fellow scientists
+that the mermaid was a fabulous or extinct
+creature; for during a lifetime devoted to
+exhibiting the mysterious marvels of nature
+to the American public it had never been my
+good fortune to acquire one. You will observe
+that she is half woman and half fish,
+and she is perfectly helpless when out of the
+water. She is unfortunately unable to express
+herself in any known tongue; in fact,
+she has never uttered a sound since her capture
+and we fear that she has lost her voice,
+which&mdash;' Just then he was interrupted by a
+howl of terror from the platform, which was
+followed by a roar of laughter from the
+audience, and when he turned he saw the
+squaw standing up and trying to wrap the
+fake tail around a pair of well-developed,
+copper-colored legs. Her face was as pale<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[135]</a></span>
+as a squaw's face could get and Merritt
+knew the jig was up. I was peeking in the
+door, and when I saw what had happened I
+gathered up the box-office receipts and
+faded away. I met Merritt that evening in
+our usual saloon, and underneath a pair of
+black eyes and a battered-up phiz I could
+see that he was wearing a look of deep disgust.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says he, 'this is what comes from
+pinning your faith to a woman and not appreciating
+the weakness of the sex. She
+faced the danger of being burned alive and
+never turned a hair; but when she saw a
+measly little mouse crawl under the platform
+she busted up the whole show.'"</p>
+
+<p>The Stranger said good-night and started
+for the city, but before he reached the railway
+station he was drenched by the downpour
+which the Proprietor had predicted.</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_137" id="Page_137">[137]</a></span></p>
+<h2>MAKING A STAR LION AND AN<br />
+INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE<br />
+MEETING</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_139" id="Page_139">[139]</a></span></p>
+<h2>MAKING A STAR LION AND AN<br />
+INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE<br />
+MEETING</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">"You</span> were not in this part of the country
+when New York was in an uproar
+for two days over the escape
+of one of my lions," said the Proprietor
+to the Stranger as they joined the Press
+Agent. "I suppose that ninety per cent.
+of the people who remember it think that
+it was all a fake, but I can assure you that
+I put in the most strenuous forty-eight
+hours of my career while he was loose, and
+it pretty nearly decided me to give up the
+show business. It was my first experience at
+running an independent show, and after
+great persuasion I had induced my father to
+let me bring some boxing kangaroos, two
+young lions and Wallace, a fine big brute
+about fifteen years old, from our English
+establishment to the States. Wallace was
+already a famous&mdash;or infamous&mdash;lion in<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_140" id="Page_140">[140]</a></span>
+England, where he had the score of three
+trainers to his credit. He had received the
+name of 'The Mankiller' over there, and
+they were rather relieved to have me get him
+out of the country.</p>
+
+<p>"His last victim was a Frenchman, one
+of the best-known trainers in the business,
+and he went into the cage to subdue Wallace
+on a wager. He won, and a remarkable performance
+it was, but I won't take the time
+to tell you about that now. He made just
+one little mistake: his vanity got the better
+of him when he turned his back on the lion to
+bow to the audience after remaining in the
+cage for ten minutes. As I said, he won
+the bet, and it about paid the funeral expenses
+of what was left of him. After that
+the only man who could go near Wallace
+was a half-breed American Indian from up
+near Cape Cod; Broncho Boccacio, he called
+himself. I don't know what the other half
+of him was, and I don't remember how he
+happened to be with our English show, but
+all sorts and conditions of men drift into the
+animal training business. At any rate, he<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_141" id="Page_141">[141]</a></span>
+was the only man who could do anything
+with Wallace, and that wasn't much. He
+would get into the cage and chase him
+around a bit and then jump out quick&mdash;always
+backward after seeing what happened
+to the Frenchman. I brought him along to
+take especial charge of the brute. It took
+a couple of days to get the animals through
+the customs, and in the meantime I cast
+about for quarters and finally rented a stable<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_142" id="Page_142">[142]</a></span>
+on Eighteenth Street to keep them in until
+I should secure an engagement." He took
+a pencil from his pocket and drew a plan on
+the white table top.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="There_was_a_loose_lion_downstairs_and_a_nurse_and_two_children_in_the_loft" id="There_was_a_loose_lion_downstairs_and_a_nurse_and_two_children_in_the_loft"></a>
+<img src="images/025.png" width="650" height="483" alt="" title="" />
+"There was a loose lion downstairs and a nurse and two children in the loft."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"The stable was arranged in this way:
+here in the front was the carriage house with
+these narrow stairs at the side leading up to
+the loft. On each side of the door was a window
+facing on the street, and back of the
+carriage room was the stable proper&mdash;two
+stalls and a loose-box. On one side of the
+stable was a saloon and on the other a carpenter
+shop, so I didn't expect much complaint
+from my neighbors, as my men patronized
+one, while I ordered the carpenter
+to build a traveling cage for Wallace which
+would slide on wheels, as our English cages
+were too heavy to handle in a country where
+labor is as high as it is here. I moved the
+lions up to the stable to let them rest a bit
+after the voyage and started to look for an
+engagement. It was a hard row to hoe, as
+I was not known in this country, and the best
+I could do was a booking at a dime museum
+for a month, and I had to take a lowish price<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[143]</a></span>
+at that, but I ordered a big nine sheet poster
+and trusted to luck to make more out of
+them later.</p>
+
+<p>"The lions were in three cages in the
+stable, and in one of the stalls I had a trotting
+horse which had been purchased for my
+brother in England, and which I kept there
+until I should have an opportunity to ship it
+to the other side. The kangaroos were in
+the loft, and a couple of days after they
+were all settled my two little girls came over
+from the hotel with me one morning and
+went up there with the nurse to play with
+them while I went into the carpenter shop
+next door to settle for the new cage, which
+had just been delivered. Broncho, as soon
+as he struck his native soil, had discovered
+a camp of other Indians on the Bowery and
+spent most of his time in their encampment,
+leaving a Cockney Englishman in charge of
+the lions and the horse. I intended to wait
+until he arrived before shifting Wallace to
+the new cage, but the Englishman thought
+he would show his cleverness and attempted
+to do it alone without waiting for us. He<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[144]</a></span>
+threw a piece of meat into the new cage and
+then rolled it up to the old one, and when the
+doors were opposite each other he opened
+them. Of course Wallace made a spring for
+the meat in the new cage, but he struck the
+edge of the door, and as the Cockney had
+neglected to block the wheels the cage rolled
+away and the keeper gave a yell and bolted
+for the stairs. There was a loose lion downstairs&mdash;and
+a bad one at that&mdash;and the nurse
+and two children in the loft.</p>
+
+<p>"The first I knew of it was from the
+nurse, who had grabbed the children and
+stood with them in the door which had been
+used to pass the hay in, yelling 'Fire!' and
+'Murder!' but I knew that there was hell to
+pay as soon as I reached the street, by the
+sound which came from the stable. We got
+a ladder from the carpenter shop and hustled
+the nurse and children down to the
+street, and then I went up to the loft, while
+the nurse and the Cockney held the small
+door from the stable to the street, which
+could not be fastened from the outside until
+the carpenter spiked some plank over it.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[145]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"A look into the stable convinced me that
+I did not want to go down the stairs, for
+with one blow Wallace had converted a thousand-dollar
+trotting horse into two dollars'
+worth of lion meat, and he was crouched on
+the body, which he had dragged from the
+stall, clawing at its throat and drinking the
+blood. The place looked like a shambles, and
+the growls which came from Wallace as the
+other lions threw themselves against the bars
+of their cages in their efforts to get out and
+join in the feast were redoubled when he
+caught sight of my head through the trap-door.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[146]</a></span>
+I slammed it down and drew the kangaroo
+cage on top of it and then went down
+to the street to see that the windows and
+doors were securely boarded up. A great
+crowd was gathering and I was afraid that
+the police would shoot the brute, for I saw
+the possibilities of an advertisement which
+would more than pay for the expensive meal
+which Wallace was making from the trotting
+horse.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="His_vanity_got_the_better_of_him_when_he_turned_his_back_on_the_lion_to_bow_to_the_audience" id="His_vanity_got_the_better_of_him_when_he_turned_his_back_on_the_lion_to_bow_to_the_audience"></a>
+<img src="images/026.png" width="650" height="381" alt="" title="" />
+"His vanity got the better of him when he turned his back on the lion, to bow to the audience."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Just as I reached the street, Broncho
+strolled up. As I said, he was a queer-looking
+guy; his skin was copper-colored and he
+had piercing black eyes and long, fuzzy
+black hair which fell down to his shoulders.
+His nose was hooked and something about
+his face always reminded me of a bird of
+prey. He was only a half-breed, but when
+I told him what had occurred he was all Indian
+and he drew a long knife and started
+for the Cockney, who gave only one look at
+the expression on Broncho's face and then
+started for Harlem, touching only the high
+spots until he was quite out of sight. Broncho
+didn't chase him; he just looked after<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[147]</a></span>
+him with a smile on his face, glad to see him
+disappear, as there had been more or less bad
+blood between them for a long time. Then
+he came to me and laughed at the idea of
+danger and offered to go into the stable and
+put Wallace back in the cage. I knew that
+it would be impossible until the lion had
+gorged himself on horse meat, and now that
+the damage was done I was in no hurry to
+allay the excitement until the police and reporters
+arrived. We didn't have to wait
+long, for the crowd had grown until the
+street was blocked, and, of course, the reporters
+asked more than a thousand questions.
+When I had worked the sensation up
+pretty well I consented to let Broncho take
+his training rod and go down, and I went
+with him carrying a club and a pitchfork.
+Things commenced to happen right away,
+for Wallace didn't wait for the call of time,
+but sailed right into us, and when I saw that
+he was getting the better of Broncho I made
+a bluff at going back to the carcass of the
+horse. Wallace bounded back to protect it
+and crouched on it, snarling viciously, but<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[148]</a></span>
+the delay gave me a chance to help Broncho
+up the stairway. There was not enough of
+his trousers left to wad a gun, and while I
+was bandaging up a deep claw wound in his
+thigh that advertisement seemed less and less
+important to me, and I would have given a
+good deal to have Wallace safely behind the
+bars of his cage again. He was contracted
+for four weeks anyway, and it takes a pretty
+big sensation to be remembered for more
+than thirty days in New York.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, we fussed about all day, trying to
+figure out some way to get the beggar back
+in his cage, and I got an earache listening to
+advice from people who had never seen a
+lion, but who considered themselves experts.
+At sunset Wallace still held the fort and the
+streets were blocked in all directions, for the
+afternoon papers were out with extras with
+scare-heads. The boards over the windows
+made the interior of the stable so dark that
+no one could see into it, but the roars which
+came from it gave the spectators all the
+thrills they were entitled to and caused a
+stampede every few minutes. We tried to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[149]</a></span>
+drive Wallace into the cage with a stream of
+water from the fire plug, but he only shook
+his head and growled at it, so we gave it up
+and waited for daylight. There were about
+forty policemen and a crowd of reporters
+about the place all night, and I was getting
+nervous for fear some fool would shoot the
+lion, whose value was increasing every minute,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_150" id="Page_150">[150]</a></span>
+so I kept awake and did a heap of
+thinking.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 199px;"><a name="Broncho_was_only_a_half-breed" id="Broncho_was_only_a_half-breed"></a>
+<img src="images/027.png" width="199" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Broncho was only a half-breed."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"I knew that Wallace would fight for his
+'kill' as long as any of the meat was left, so
+we rigged up a tackle to try and draw the
+carcass out. We were all ready at daylight
+and the crowd was bigger than ever. Say,
+if you want to count the idle people in New
+York just get up a free show at any hour
+of the day or night and they will all come.
+There must have been over a thousand loafing
+about the street all night. We were just
+getting ready to make a try for the horse
+when the idlers outside gave a cheer, and I
+saw an express wagon loaded with nets and
+ropes and all sorts of animal catching stuff
+drive up. Tody Hamilton, Barnum's press
+agent, had caught on to the possibilities of
+an advertisement, and sent to the winter
+quarters at Bridgeport for some of their
+animal men to come down and capture a
+loose lion. They supposed it was in Central
+Park, and when they found it was in a
+stable the job looked easy to them. One of
+them, a man named McDonald, had been<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_151" id="Page_151">[151]</a></span>
+with our English show, and when he heard
+that it was Wallace they were to tackle his
+enthusiasm seemed to melt. He told the
+others a few anecdotes of the lion, and two
+of them went to find the Cockney, I guess,
+for we never saw them again.</p>
+
+<p>"We managed to throw a slip noose
+around the carcass from the stairs, and when
+we passed the end of the rope out of the
+window there must have been five hundred
+men pulling on it from the way that horse's
+body slid across the floor. The four of us
+stood around the trap-door to beat Wallace
+back, and when he realized that he was losing
+his prey it kept us busy.</p>
+
+<p>"Say, a dead horse seems to have more
+legs than a centipede when you try to drag
+it through a narrow space, and they all stick
+out in different directions. Of course, this
+one stuck and then there was more trouble,
+for when I took an axe to dismember it, a
+cop threatened to arrest me for cutting up a
+horse in the city limits. It took three hours
+to satisfy the red-tape requirements and get
+a permit from the Board of Health, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_152" id="Page_152">[152]</a></span>
+then I had a long, sickening job, for we had
+to haul up what was left of the poor beast
+in fragments, and all the time Wallace was
+snapping at them or rushing at us. We
+gave him several nasty cracks over the snout,
+the only place where a lion seems to be sensitive
+to pain, but it only made him uglier
+than ever and I knew that there was a pretty
+fight ahead of us. It was a case of 'Perdicaris
+alive or Raisouli dead' with me, for the
+police were getting impatient, and I knew
+they would shoot him if we did not get him
+caged before night.</p>
+
+<p>"We drew lots to see who should be the
+first to go down, and I think that McDonald
+stacked the straws, for Broncho won&mdash;or
+lost&mdash;I was second, the other Barnum man
+third and McDonald last; but he made good
+after we got down there, and it was what
+the President would have called a 'crowded
+hour.' If Wallace hadn't been full of horse
+meat, which made him a trifle slow, I think
+he would have chased the bunch of us out,
+and as it was he gave us all we wanted to do.
+We used blank cartridges, Roman candles,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_153" id="Page_153">[153]</a></span>
+training rods and whips, and I learned afterward
+that the crowd outside thought we were
+all being torn to pieces, but we finally conquered
+and it was a singed and battered lion
+which jumped back into the den and gave
+me a chance to slam the door. The noise of
+the clicking lock sounded good to me, and I
+went up the stairs with a lighter heart, in
+spite of tattered clothes and a scratched hand
+and bruised body. I knew that I had a small
+fortune in the beast, but I nearly cried when<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_154" id="Page_154">[154]</a></span>
+I went into the saloon to freshen up, and the
+first thing I saw was the poster with the
+announcement that Wallace would be shown
+at the dime museum. I knew that it would
+make the reporters, who had been writing
+columns of space, suspect that it was all a
+fake and prearranged. The manager was
+afraid that I would renege on my contract
+after all the free advertising, but he didn't
+know me.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="We_didnt_have_any_regular_snake_charmer_but_Merritt_made_himself_up_for_a_Hindoo_fakir" id="We_didnt_have_any_regular_snake_charmer_but_Merritt_made_himself_up_for_a_Hindoo_fakir"></a>
+<img src="images/028.png" width="650" height="403" alt="" title="" />
+"We didn't have any regular snake charmer, but Merritt made himself up for a Hindoo fakir."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Sure enough, the reporters came for me
+in a body while I was still tired and dirty
+from the fight and worn out with anxiety
+and loss of sleep. They accused me of having
+put up a job on them, but I guess the
+sight of my condition convinced them of my
+sincerity, for only one paper even hinted at
+any crookedness, and that proved the best
+advertisement in the whole business.</p>
+
+<p>"It was the <i>Sun</i> which came out in an
+article about Wallace, saying that he was
+toothless and decrepit from old age, and
+that there had never been the slightest danger
+from him. If the reporter who wrote it
+had gone into the stable with us, I don't<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_155" id="Page_155">[155]</a></span>
+think he would have written the article. I
+did my own announcing in those days and I
+always started off with the announcement,
+'Ladies and gentlemen! If you see it in the
+<i>Sun</i>, it's so, and the <i>Sun</i> says that Wallace
+is played out and toothless from old age.'
+Then I would make a move to the front of
+the cage, and Wallace, who had a special
+hatred for me, would spring at the bars and
+show as pretty a set of fangs as you would
+wish to see and I was always sure of a laugh.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, I showed Wallace in New York
+and other cities for thirty straight weeks
+and got back the value of that trotter a good
+many times over," continued the Proprietor
+as he rose from the table. "His name is one
+to conjure with, even yet, and nearly every
+lion which is exhibited in the side shows at
+the county fairs is billed as 'Wallace, the
+Untamable!' The original Wallace is still
+alive and at our English breeding establishment."
+He said good-night and left the
+table, the Press Agent looking regretfully
+after him.</p>
+
+<p>"That's just like the boss," he complained<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_156" id="Page_156">[156]</a></span>
+as he watched the retreating figure. "He
+takes the center of the stage until he has told
+his story, and when my turn comes to get in
+the limelight he does the disappearing act.
+That was a pretty good story, but talking of
+escapes, I can tell you about an escape that
+is worth talking about. It happened when
+a guy named Merritt and myself were running
+a snake show next to a camp meeting
+down on the Jersey coast. We didn't have
+any regular snake charmer, but we bought
+a lot of wrigglers from a dealer down on
+the Bowery and Merritt made himself up
+for a Hindoo fakir. He would get into
+the cage with them and those snakes would
+wrap themselves about him from his head
+to his toes and it was an awe-inspiring sight.
+He taught them to stand up on their tails
+and dance while he played on a tin whistle
+and to do other pretty little tricks, but the
+great and original stunt was what he called
+the 'Interminable Snake,' when one would
+grab the biggest snake's tail in his mouth,
+another would fasten onto him, and so on
+until the whole blame lot looked like one big<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_157" id="Page_157">[157]</a></span>
+serpent. Say, those snakes got so stuck
+on that game that they would do it for
+sport without the word of command. Whenever
+one started to move around the cage
+another would grab his tail, and the first
+thing you knew the whole bunch was going
+around in a string and the sight of it
+was enough to make a man swear off for a
+year.</p>
+
+<p>"We were doing a fine business until a
+temperance lecturer set up a show a little
+way off, and that cut into us so that there
+was nothing much doing. The crowd would
+walk right past the entrance to our 'Highly
+Moral and Instructive Exhibition,' and go
+on to listen to the temperance guy telling
+them about the evils of drink, as illustrated
+by the horrible living examples which he had
+upon the platform. You see that was a free
+show, while ours cost a quarter&mdash;and cheap
+at the price.</p>
+
+<p>"One afternoon after I had cracked my
+voice trying to draw the crowd without
+landing one of 'em, Merritt comes to me,
+and as we saw the crowd pouring in to the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_158" id="Page_158">[158]</a></span>
+temperance show, we looked at each other
+and shook our heads in sorrow.</p>
+
+<p>"'Jim,' says Merritt, 'that guy down
+there has got you skinned to death on the
+ballyhoo, and it's up to you to go over there
+and get next to the attraction and see if we
+can't cop it out for our show. I hate to ask
+it of you,' says he, 'knowing your views on
+the temperance question, but business is
+business and this ain't no time for sentiment.'
+It went against the grain, but I
+knew it must be done, so I went down to the
+lecture. I wasn't wise to the game, but I
+was anxious not to miss a trick, so I went
+right up to the front, and the first thing I
+knew I was seated on the mourners' bench,
+right under the platform. As soon as the
+lecturer came on I piped him for a guy that
+used to pull teeth on the Bowery with a
+brass band accompaniment and a gasoline
+torch, and I remembered that at that time
+he could punish more booze than any man
+I ever knew. He had the gift of gab all
+right, and he had picked up a couple of
+panhandlers for horrible examples and they<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_159" id="Page_159">[159]</a></span>
+looked the part. If either one of them had
+ever drawn a sober breath in twenty years
+he should have sued his face for libel, and
+they looked as if they had been towed behind
+a trolley car from the Battery to Fort
+George.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, the ex-jaw carpenter cut loose in
+good form, and he soon had every one
+worked up, telling the horrible things which
+alcohol did to your interior lining, and giving
+a description of the menagerie which a
+man sees when he has the jim-jams, which
+would have done credit to the boss lecturer
+in there." He pointed with his thumb to
+the Arena, and the alert waiter, taking it
+for a signal, refilled the glasses.</p>
+
+<p>"He did it so well that he sort of had me
+going, and I was beginning to think that
+possibly I was taking a trifle too much,"
+continued the Press Agent, as he sampled
+the fresh drink. "I was giving the matter
+serious thought, when my attention was attracted
+by one of the panhandlers who was
+nudging his partner.</p>
+
+<p>"'Bill,' says he, 'tell the old man to put<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_160" id="Page_160">[160]</a></span>
+on full steam ahead, for I'm backsliding
+and need encouragement. I'm afraid I've
+got 'em again. Look there!' Bill looks
+down the aisle and gets uneasy, too.</p>
+
+<p>"'Hank,' says he, 'I've got 'em, likewise,
+only that ain't my usual kind of snake, coz
+he ain't got no plug hat with a red flannel
+band on it; but it's me for the bromide and
+the simple life.'</p>
+
+<p>"'It's this damn Jersey whiskey that's
+changed 'em,' answers Bill. 'Mine always
+has gorillas ridin' 'em.' Well, I looked
+around and I would have been scared myself
+if I hadn't recognized our own bunch of
+snakes, each one of 'em with the tail of the
+snake in front of him in his mouth. Old
+'Limber Larry'&mdash;we called him that on account
+of his habit of going to sleep curled
+up in a true lover's knot&mdash;was in the lead,
+and behind him came about half a mile of
+snakes.</p>
+
+<p>"They were festooning themselves up the
+aisle, coming slow, because there were a
+couple of them which could not move very
+fast, and when the gait got too lively they<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_161" id="Page_161">[161]</a></span>
+used to bite their leaders' tails. Old Larry
+was raising his head and looking around
+every few feet, and just when the lecturer
+had reached the most thrilling part of his
+'Ten Nights in a Barroom' spiel he caught
+Larry's eye and the meeting adjourned,
+<i>sine die</i>, right there. You couldn't see him
+for dust as he broke for the nearest 'speakeasy,'
+and the two panhandlers were hanging
+on to his coat tails.</p>
+
+<p>"Just then Merritt comes in looking worried,
+for he had gone to sleep and let 'em get
+away from him, but when he sees 'em he
+takes his tin whistle out of his pocket and
+goes back to the show, tooting it like a
+blasted Pied Piper, the snakes following
+along as meek as Mary's little lamb, and
+most of the audience goes with him at a
+quarter per."</p>
+
+<p>"Did business improve?" asked the
+Stranger.</p>
+
+<p>"Improve? Why, my boy, after we put
+that temperance show out of business we
+just turned 'em away for three months.
+Not only did we do a good business, but the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_162" id="Page_162">[162]</a></span>
+hotel people put us on the free list at the
+bar, because Merritt used to take 'em down
+in 'Interminable Snake' formation for a dip
+in the ocean every morning, and the hotel
+press agent wrote it up as the daily appearance
+of the gigantic sea serpent."</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_163" id="Page_163">[163]</a></span></p>
+<h2>KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_165" id="Page_165">[165]</a></span></p>
+<h2>KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">A delegation</span> from the National
+Association of Press Agents which
+was holding its annual meeting in
+the interests of the Furtherance of Truth
+and the Elevation of the Show Business
+had left the meeting place in New York,
+and after inspecting the various moral and
+entertaining performances at Coney Island
+was gathered about one of the white-topped
+tables near the Dreamland tower. Colonel
+Tody Hamilton, prince of press agents,
+master of a picturesque vocabulary, inventor
+of superlatives in the English language
+and champion of veracity, pointed laughingly
+toward the Arena, where the Proprietor
+of the trained animal exhibition
+was instructing a new barker how to make
+the most out of a trick of one of the elephants
+which was being used for ballyhoo<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_166" id="Page_166">[166]</a></span>
+purposes in front of the entrance to his
+show.</p>
+
+<p>"Listen to him, gentlemen, and you will
+be convinced that he is eligible to membership
+in our truth-loving fraternity," he
+remarked admiringly. The ungainly pachyderm
+was standing on its hind legs, trumpeting
+through its upraised trunk a protest
+against the prodding of the sharp goad
+which was forcing it to walk backward in
+that absurd position. The voice of the Proprietor,
+who was using a megaphone, came
+to them distinctly as he invited the people
+to look at "One of the greatest triumphs of
+the animal trainer's art; something which
+has never been exhibited in any country&mdash;an
+elephant <span class="smcapl">WALKING UPON ITS HIND LEGS</span>,
+BACKWARD!"</p>
+
+<p>The speech caught and held the attention
+of the crowd, and when the elephant was
+allowed to rejoin its companions and the
+three great beasts entered the building in
+single file, Tom grasping Roger's tail in his
+trunk and Alice following suit with the caudal
+appendage of Tom, a goodly number<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_167" id="Page_167">[167]</a></span>
+stepped up to the ticket booth and paid their
+entrance money. The Colonel and his associates,
+whose business had made them familiar
+with elephants, smiled at the credulity
+of the crowd, but acknowledged the Proprietor's
+skill in attracting an audience.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 584px;"><a name="Sam_Watson_confessed_the_whole_thing" id="Sam_Watson_confessed_the_whole_thing"></a>
+<img src="images/029.png" width="584" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Sam Watson confessed the whole thing."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"You wouldn't believe that I spent over
+seven hundred dollars to turn that smallest<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_168" id="Page_168">[168]</a></span>
+elephant white a few years ago," said the
+Colonel as the waiter refilled their glasses,
+but his companions made unanimous protestation
+that they would believe any statement
+he made, and the Colonel settled back
+comfortably in his chair to tell the story
+which they demanded.</p>
+
+<p>"You will have to listen to the story of the
+famous war of the white elephants, then,"
+he said, good-naturedly, "a struggle which
+will remain famous in the circus world as
+long as the big tops are spread. It was in
+the good old days of fierce competition in
+the business, the days when the press agents
+earned every dollar of their salaries, and
+sometimes had to go to the extent of saying
+things in print which were not strictly true.
+There was intense rivalry between the two
+big shows, the P. T. Barnum and the Forepaugh
+aggregations, and the bitter feeling
+between the proprietors was transmitted to
+the employees. The advance agents would
+steal each other's printed matter and posters
+out of the express offices, and you could always
+count on a fight between the canvas<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_169" id="Page_169">[169]</a></span>
+men whenever the two shows were close
+enough together. They would damage each
+other's property, loosen nuts on the wagons
+so that the wheels would come off and cause
+upsets, and do anything to embarrass the
+rival show.</p>
+
+<p>"Each show tried to outdo the other at
+every point; advertising, number of performers,
+length of the street parade, menagerie
+collection and everything which money
+could buy. They started in to see which could
+get the largest herd of elephants, each advertising
+the largest herd in captivity, and that
+competition raised the price of elephants all
+over the world and denuded every small
+zoological park in Europe, while it pretty
+nearly bankrupted the shows to feed them.
+We had eighty with the Barnum circus, and
+finally Mr. Barnum came to me and said
+that he had purchased a Sacred White Elephant
+and told me to start giving it publicity.
+Of course, I didn't know anything
+about that particular kind of elephant, but
+as I always like to be perfectly accurate in
+my statements I made a scientific study of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_170" id="Page_170">[170]</a></span>
+it. I found that, as a matter of fact, there
+was no such thing as a white elephant known
+in natural history, although there was an
+occasional absence of the usual pigment in
+the skins of some beasts which give them
+a trifle lighter color, and that these animals
+were apt to have a few spots on the body
+which were nearly white, just as you sometimes
+hear of a negro who is spotted. When
+such a spot occurs in the center of the forehead
+the Buddhists regard the beast as
+sacred, from the fact that the god, Buddha,
+is always depicted as wearing a jewel in that
+position and it is looked upon as his special
+mark of protection. It is the ambition of
+every Indian Rajah to possess one, for then
+he is billed as 'The Lord of the Sacred
+White Elephant,' a title which seems to fill
+a long-felt want in the heart of an Oriental
+potentate.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, Barnum's agent had, by some
+hook or crook, procured one of these and
+sent it to London, but owing to the lateness
+of the season it was decided to leave it there
+in the Zoological Gardens and get up a controversy<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_171" id="Page_171">[171]</a></span>
+which, in itself, would be a good
+advertisement for it. The average Englishman
+is very fond of writing to the <i>Times</i> to
+expose a fraud, and we knew that there
+would be a protest from those who would be
+disappointed in the brute's color. There are
+hundreds of retired officers who have served
+in India living in London, and they know all<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_172" id="Page_172">[172]</a></span>
+about Sacred White Elephants, and time
+hangs heavily on their hands. They were
+only too anxious to certify to its genuineness,
+and they wrote the peppery kind of
+replies to the criticisms which might be expected
+from men who had spent the best
+years of their lives under a hot sun and lived
+upon curries and red peppers. Of course,
+I saw that the letters were copied in the
+home papers, and before the circus season
+opened I had the Great American Public
+watching anxiously for the reported sailing
+of the Sacred White Elephant.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 439px;"><a name="Walking_upon_its_hind_legs_BACKWARD" id="Walking_upon_its_hind_legs_BACKWARD"></a>
+<img src="images/030.png" width="439" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Walking upon its hind legs, <span class="smcapl">BACKWARD</span>."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"I should have been on my guard, for the
+Forepaugh bunch just kept sawing wood
+and saying nothing, but whenever I met
+their press agent he gave me the quiet laugh.
+Our elephant was finally shipped, and you
+can imagine that I made the most of it in
+the papers. I had 'em filled up for two days,
+and then, while ours was still in mid-ocean,
+out comes Forepaugh's announcement that
+his Sacred White Elephant would land in
+New York the following day. I knew it
+was a fake, for they were very difficult to<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_173" id="Page_173">[173]</a></span>
+obtain, but they stole our thunder, just the
+same. I managed to get a peep at it while
+it was being unloaded, and although it was
+only a dirty yellowish color, I knew that it
+would make ours look like a decided brunette
+by comparison. They had worked it
+well and kept it quiet, but knowing that
+there was a nigger in the woodpile and that
+money would bring him out, I spent it like
+a drunken sailor in trying to get information.</p>
+
+<p>"Forepaugh had eminent scientists examine
+the beast and give their certificates that
+it was genuine, and all the inside information
+I could get was that the elephant had
+been purchased through Cross, the great
+animal dealer in Liverpool, and that it had
+been kept secluded in his place there all winter.
+Sam Watson, who was Forepaugh's
+foreign agent, and his groom, a man named
+Telford, were the only people who had access
+to it, and they had spent hours every
+day in its stall. Cross would give us no information
+as to how or where he obtained
+the elephant, for Forepaugh bought all of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_174" id="Page_174">[174]</a></span>
+the animals for his menagerie through him,
+while we dealt with his great rival, Hagenbeck,
+of Hamburg.</p>
+
+<p>"Forepaugh got all the newspaper space
+for the next few days, and when our elephant
+finally arrived it looked mighty dark-colored
+for a white elephant when compared
+with the fake one. It was hard to educate
+the people up to the significance of the little
+white spot in the center of the forehead, but
+any one but a blind man could see that Forepaugh's
+fake was lighter in color. We went
+at it, horse, foot and artillery, and the fight
+cost the two shows more than a quarter of a
+million dollars, and lasted until we patched
+up a truce in St. Louis to save us both going
+into bankruptcy. I got some of Cross's employees
+to swear that they had seen the elephant
+being painted in Liverpool, and Forepaugh
+replied by getting a commission of
+scientific sharps from Ann Arbor to examine
+the beast and swear that the color was
+natural. There was good money in perjury
+and scientific opinions those days, but I
+never let up for a minute in my endeavor<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_175" id="Page_175">[175]</a></span>
+to get at the truth of the matter, for I knew
+it was hanky panky and I am a diligent
+searcher after truth, especially when a rival
+has sunk it to the bottom of a well. I experimented
+with some of our elephants until I
+nearly took their thick hides off, but I could
+get no satisfactory results until I called in<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_176" id="Page_176">[176]</a></span>
+Marchand, the chemist, and asked him if he
+could give me something to bleach an elephant.
+He had an especially strong solution
+of peroxide of hydrogen made up, and I
+selected the smallest animal out of our herd
+of eighty to try it on. It happened to be the
+one which you just saw working on the
+ballyhoo over there, which you noticed was
+the ordinary slate color. We soaked cloths
+in the peroxide and covered the beast with
+them and then put blankets on top. After
+they had been on for awhile we washed the
+animal with ammonia and water and repeated
+the performance until that elephant
+was as white as snow.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 506px;"><a name="Forepaugh_had_eminent_scientists_examine_the_beast" id="Forepaugh_had_eminent_scientists_examine_the_beast"></a>
+<img src="images/031.png" width="506" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Forepaugh had eminent scientists examine the beast."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Forepaugh was to open in Philadelphia,
+so I shipped our fake over there, and when
+they had their street parade I followed right
+behind it with our bleached animal on a
+truck which was liberally placarded. The
+notices called attention to the fact that Forepaugh's
+alleged sacred elephant was simply
+painted and that the men who did it were
+bunglers at the business. '<span class="smcap">Look at This
+One!</span>' read our largest placard. '<span class="smcap">We<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_177" id="Page_177">[177]</a></span>
+TELL YOU that it is a FAKE!</span> So is
+Forepaugh's, but he won't tell! This is A
+BETTER JOB BY A BETTER ARTIST!'
+That made the Forepaugh people
+hot, and they replied with a new bunch of
+affidavits and expert opinions from a lot
+of University of Pennsylvania professors.
+That couldn't offset our show-up, though,
+and the whole situation had become so mixed
+that the public thought all of the elephants
+were fakes. We had the only genuine one
+and the best fake also, but they were a pair
+of white elephants in every sense of the
+term, and a losing proposition. The one
+which we had bleached would only keep
+white for about two weeks, and as each
+treatment cost seven hundred dollars Barnum
+called me off. The Forepaugh bunch
+was trying to poison it, and as the whole
+thing was dead as a money-making venture
+and white elephants a drug in the market,
+we let this one regain its natural color.
+When the great herd was broken up it was
+sold off, and I never saw it again until to-night."<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_178" id="Page_178">[178]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>"But what was the inside history of the
+Forepaugh white elephant?" asked one of
+his companions, and the Colonel smiled as he
+lighted a fresh cigar.</p>
+
+<p>"I never knew it until this year, when one
+night over a friendly drink Sam Watson,
+who is now a clown with the Big Show, confessed
+the whole thing. Forepaugh is dead
+and the shows have been consolidated, so
+there is no further object in keeping the
+thing quiet. It seems that Forepaugh's
+agents found out that Barnum had purchased
+the elephant from an impecunious
+Indian Rajah; in fact, he had purchased
+two, the first one having died on its way
+to England. It was the misdirection of a
+cable announcing the death and ordering
+another at any cost which put them wise to
+the fact that Barnum had a rarity. Watson
+had never heard of a sacred elephant, but he
+started out to get one when he read that
+cablegram. They were scarce articles, and
+Barnum had bought the only two which
+were to be had for love or money in all India,
+so he and Cross got their heads together and<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_179" id="Page_179">[179]</a></span>
+started out to manufacture a bogus one in
+Liverpool.</p>
+
+<p>"They prepared a closed stall, which was
+always kept locked, and put an elephant in
+it&mdash;just a common, or garden, elephant.
+Then Sam and his groom, Telford, proceeded<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_180" id="Page_180">[180]</a></span>
+to get busy with bath bricks, pumice
+stone and a barrel of white aniline dye. I
+imagine they had a pretty hard winter's
+work and it was certainly a tough period for
+the elephant, because they had to scrape
+about half the skin off the poor brute before
+the dye would take hold. They finally succeeded
+in getting him several shades lighter
+than normal, all except about eighteen
+inches at the end of the trunk. They could
+do nothing with that on account of the habit
+of the beast, which was always mussing
+around in its bedding, searching for stray
+peanuts.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 513px;"><a name="Then_Sam_and_his_groom_Telford_proceeded_to_get_busy" id="Then_Sam_and_his_groom_Telford_proceeded_to_get_busy"></a>
+<img src="images/032.png" width="513" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Then Sam and his groom, Telford, proceeded to get busy."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"They kept in touch with the London
+Zoo and found out when we were to ship the
+genuine one, and then got their fake on a
+steamer which would land it in New York
+a few days ahead of us. Of course, they
+had to keep working at it all the way over,
+but they kept it quiet and no one caught on.
+When the scientific sharps came to examine
+it, Sam would hoist the trunk up in the air
+while he drew their attention to the marvelous
+whiteness of the under side, and no one<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_181" id="Page_181">[181]</a></span>
+caught on to the fact that the end of the
+trunk was the natural color.</p>
+
+<p>"He let them remove some bits of skin for
+microscopic examination to prove that no
+dye was used, but he always had them taken
+from the inner side of the foreleg near the
+body, from which the natural pigment is
+absent in all elephants. Sam swears that
+they never had to fix one of the experts;
+they were only too anxious to get the advertisement,
+and they were prepared to swear,
+and did in this particular case, that black
+was white.</p>
+
+<p>"I have a few gray hairs in my head, and
+most of them came during the strain of that
+fight. The game isn't what it used to be
+and I'm glad that it isn't, and let me tell you,
+as a result of long experience, that the worst
+thing which can happen to a man is to have
+a white elephant, fake or genuine, on his
+hands."</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_183" id="Page_183">[183]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE HYPNOTIC BEAR<br />
+AND THE<br />
+SENTIMENTAL LECTURER</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_185" id="Page_185">[185]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE HYPNOTIC BEAR<br />
+AND THE<br />
+SENTIMENTAL LECTURER</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">The</span> doctor shook his head as he
+slipped his ophthalmoscope into his
+pocket, and Rey, the trainer, who
+had been holding the bear's head still while
+the oculist made the examination, opened
+the door of the cage for him. The bear&mdash;a
+medium-sized black animal&mdash;wandered
+aimlessly about, stumbling over the water
+pan and knocking its head against the bars,
+its eyes, which were evidently sightless,
+shining like two fiery opals as they reflected
+the electric light.</p>
+
+<p>"I am sorry to tell you that it is a hopeless
+case," said the physician to the Proprietor,
+who was standing with the Stranger in front
+of the cage watching the examination.
+"Both optic nerves are atrophied, and the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_186" id="Page_186">[186]</a></span>
+animal must have received some serious injury,
+possibly a heavy blow on the forehead."
+The Proprietor, who has the reputation
+of being a "good loser," thanked him
+and gave some directions to the trainer
+about the care of the animal before leading
+the way to the table in front of the Arena,
+where the Press Agent was waiting for
+them.</p>
+
+<p>"It is rather unusual to call the most
+famous specialist in the country to examine
+a menagerie animal," he said, after the doctor
+hurriedly left them to catch the express
+train back to the city. "You know that he
+takes no small fee; his services are either
+given for charity or his charge is very high&mdash;and
+this visit was not for charity."</p>
+
+<p>"I should think that the value of a bear
+would hardly warrant the expense," answered
+the Stranger as the waiter filled the
+glasses.</p>
+
+<p>"It wouldn't be for an ordinary bear, but
+I was willing to pay anything in reason to
+restore the sight of this particular specimen,
+so I sent for the best-known oculist in New<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_188" id="Page_188">[188]</a></span>
+York. The decision which he has just given
+will probably mean a loss of thousands of
+dollars to me, but that is one of the risks
+which I have to assume. Would it interest
+you to hear a rather unusual romance of the
+menagerie business?" The Stranger gave
+eager assent, and the Press Agent settled
+himself comfortably and lighted a cigar.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 383px;"><a name="Page_187" id="Page_187"></a>
+<img src="images/033.png" width="383" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"There seems to be a sympathy between them."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"You have no idea how many animals
+are offered to the owner of a menagerie and
+from what unusual sources the offers come,"
+said the Proprietor. "Travelers in far countries
+bring back strange animals as pets or
+curiosities; people buy young wild animals
+which get beyond control when they mature
+and become veritable white elephants on
+their hands, and their owners have to dispose
+of them. I have had everything from monkeys
+to lions brought to me, and so it did not
+surprise me when an artist came to the Hippodrome
+in Paris last winter and asked me if
+I didn't want to purchase a bear. He
+seemed anxious for me to see it immediately,
+and at his earnest solicitation I got in a cab
+with him and drove to his studio, which was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_189" id="Page_189">[189]</a></span>
+situated on the far side of the Seine. The
+bear which you saw examined to-night was
+in a small room adjoining the studio, chained
+to a ring in the wall.</p>
+
+<p>"The apartment was luxuriously furnished,
+and I realized that it was not lack of
+ready money which made the artist so
+anxious to dispose of the brute; but he
+seemed in a desperate hurry to have me take
+it away, and offered it for such a low price
+that I closed the bargain at once. I suggested
+sending one of my men for it in the
+evening, but he insisted upon my taking it
+with me, and as the bear was evidently as
+gentle as a kitten I called a closed cab and
+drove away with it. The bear sat comfortably
+on the seat beside me and gave no
+trouble, but as we drove along I got to
+thinking the matter over and the whole proceeding
+seemed a little strange. I had
+Mephisto, as the bear was named, put in a
+cage well away from the other animals&mdash;a
+sort of quarantine precaution which I always
+take with new arrivals&mdash;and as there was
+apparently nothing unusual about him gave<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_190" id="Page_190">[190]</a></span>
+him little attention, there being for the moment
+no group of animals in training for
+which he would be available. I soon noticed
+that during the intermissions, when the
+audience wandered about and examined the
+animals in the cages, there was always a
+crowd of women about his den; but I
+thought that it was because he was such an
+inveterate beggar, and had a habit of standing
+at the bars with his mouth wide open,
+waiting for some one to flick a lump of
+sugar into it.</p>
+
+<p>"The bear had given us no trouble, and
+there was only one peculiar thing about him:
+he seemed to have an aversion to cats. The
+bodies of three of them had been found in
+front of his cage, although we had never
+seen one killed. The cats about a menagerie
+instinctively keep out of harm's way, and it
+puzzled me to know how Mephisto had managed
+to get them within reach of his heavy
+paw. Jack Bonavita, who fusses about his
+lions at all hours of the day and night,
+solved that mystery and incidentally saved
+his pet cat, Tramp, from an untimely ending.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_191" id="Page_191">[191]</a></span>
+Tramp has been with Jack for years
+and appreciates the folly of venturing
+within reach of the animals in the cages, but
+Bonavita came across him in front of Mephisto's
+cage in the middle of the night. The
+bear was absolutely quiet, lying with its head
+on its paws and its eyes, which glistened like
+two points of flame, fixed on the cat. Tramp
+was staring at it in turn and slowly drawing
+nearer to the cage, apparently struggling
+against some influence which was stronger<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_192" id="Page_192">[192]</a></span>
+than its will. Bonavita watched them for a
+few minutes, but before the cat ventured
+within striking distance he picked it up and
+carried it away, while Mephisto, growling
+with rage, tried to break through the stout
+bars and get at it.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 523px;"><a name="Tramp_was_slowly_drawing_nearer_to_the_cage" id="Tramp_was_slowly_drawing_nearer_to_the_cage"></a>
+<img src="images/034.png" width="523" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Tramp was slowly drawing nearer to the cage."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Two days before we were to sail for
+America I was sitting at my desk arranging
+some of the last details of shipment, when
+the door burst open and a well-dressed,
+handsome woman rushed in, followed by the
+artist who had sold me the bear. She was
+in a tearing rage and jabbering excitedly in
+a language which I did not understand,
+while the artist was trying to quiet her. She
+pushed him aside, and opening a purse
+which was well stuffed with banknotes, she
+asked in French, which she spoke with a
+marked foreign accent, for how much I
+would sell Mephisto. The artist protested,
+but she turned on him and gave him a
+tongue lashing of which I could guess the
+meaning, although the words were unintelligible
+to me. I couldn't quite grasp the
+situation, but the strange hypnotic power<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_193" id="Page_193">[193]</a></span>
+which the bear apparently exercised over
+cats had excited my curiosity, and I wished
+to investigate it at my leisure, so I politely
+but positively refused to name a price,
+and told her the animal was not for sale.
+The artist seemed relieved and she was
+very much disappointed, but she quieted
+down and asked me what I intended to do
+with the animal. I told her that I was taking
+it to America, where it would be put in
+a mixed group which Rey was to train, and
+after inquiring when we were to sail, they
+left the office.</p>
+
+<p>"I regretted that I had not taken the opportunity
+to find out something about the
+history of the animal, and looked over the
+audience to try to locate the couple, but they
+had left the building. One of the keepers
+told me that she had screamed when she
+recognized the bear and called it by name.
+She was trying to bribe him to let her go
+into the cage when the artist came up and
+expostulated with her, and they had an
+awful row before coming to my office. I
+heard nothing more from them and we<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_194" id="Page_194">[194]</a></span>
+shipped the animals at Havre the following
+day. The traveling dens were placed in the
+'tween decks, which is not a pleasant place
+to be when the ship is tossing about, and I
+was surprised the second day out to find the
+woman who had tried to purchase Mephisto
+standing in front of his cage in that smelly
+place, talking to the bear as if it were a child.
+She laughed when I came up to her, and
+told me that as I would not part with the
+bear I would have to take her with the show.
+I, too, laughed, for I have a large family of
+daughters, and I knew that the simple traveling
+gown which she wore had cost more
+than two months' salary of my best trainer,
+but to my great surprise she was in dead
+earnest, and asked me seriously if I would
+not let her train a group of animals."</p>
+
+<p>The Press Agent grew very attentive, but
+the Proprietor told him that he was not
+talking for publication, and that a name
+which occupied several pages of the Almanach
+de Gotha was sacred, even from an
+American promoter of publicity.</p>
+
+<p>"And she does carry that name and was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_195" id="Page_195">[195]</a></span>
+born to it," he continued, "but I can't tell
+you what it is. She didn't tell it to me and
+it was not on the passenger list, but the
+ambassador from a great European nation
+came on from Washington to see her and
+remonstrate with her and to influence me
+to exclude her from the show. I wouldn't
+consent to that, but I am afraid that the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_196" id="Page_196">[196]</a></span>
+accident of the bear's going blind will be the
+cause of my losing an act which promised
+to be sensational."</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 454px;"><a name="The_bear_sat_comfortably_on_the_seat_beside_me" id="The_bear_sat_comfortably_on_the_seat_beside_me"></a>
+<img src="images/035.png" width="454" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"The bear sat comfortably on the seat beside me."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"You have kept it quiet enough," said
+the Press Agent with a trace of resentment
+in his voice. "It sounds to me as if it ought
+to be good for a front-page column in every
+New York paper."</p>
+
+<p>"As I told you, there are reasons why I
+can't exploit it," answered the Proprietor.
+"I am counting upon it for my opening
+sensation at the Paris Hippodrome next
+winter, and I don't intend to discount it before
+a Coney Island audience. But to get
+back to my experience with her on the
+steamer. I found that she occupied the
+most expensive deck stateroom, and had a
+maid and a man servant traveling with her;
+so that I refused all of her renewed offers
+for the bear when I found the powerful fascination
+it had for her, and I finally consented
+to let her try the experiment of working
+with a group of animals. You know the
+class from which trainers are usually recruited,
+and you can imagine the interest I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_197" id="Page_197">[197]</a></span>
+take in a woman who possesses an absolute
+fearlessness which is inherited from generations
+of ancestors who have never shown the
+white feather, in addition to education and
+intelligence. The only thing which puzzled
+me was her motive, and that I have not discovered
+yet, although the ambassador, who
+had received all sorts of communications
+about her from his own government, told me
+her history. It seems that she has always
+been noted for her eccentricity and her rebellion
+against the strict laws of convention
+which were supposed to control her life, and
+this is not the first time she has defied them.
+She had commissioned the artist&mdash;who, by
+the way, is one of the most celebrated men
+in Paris&mdash;to paint a portrait of her. At the
+same time he was painting an exhibition picture
+to be called the 'Dancing Bear,' and
+had purchased Mephisto for a model. The
+picture was to represent the bear dancing
+on its hind legs opposite a woman, to the
+music of a flageolet played by a man bear
+leader&mdash;such an exhibition as is commonly
+given at the country fairs throughout Europe.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_198" id="Page_198">[198]</a></span>
+He had no difficulty in getting a male
+model, but he was in despair about the
+woman dancer. He tried model after
+model, and although they started in all right
+each one became so nervous after a sitting
+or two that they refused to continue. The
+bear was chained to the wall and they were
+posed safely out of reach, but each of them
+asserted that the animal was like a serpent
+and trying to charm them so that they would
+come close enough to be caught. They were
+all afraid that they might yield to the fascination
+and be seriously injured. Tramp,
+the cat, would probably have told the same
+story if he had been able to talk.</p>
+
+<p>"As a matter of curiosity the artist experimented
+with men, but the bear appeared
+indifferent to them and the men made no
+complaint. It only seemed to exercise this
+strange hypnotic power over women&mdash;and
+cats&mdash;for the artist found two Persian
+felines, which had been studio pets, dead
+beside it; simply crushed, as were those
+which were killed by the bear at the Hippodrome.
+He mentioned the matter during<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_199" id="Page_199">[199]</a></span>
+one of the sittings for the portrait, and the
+lady, being curious to see the animal, came
+to his studio&mdash;and then the trouble commenced.
+She developed a most unaccountable
+attachment for Mephisto, and he was
+as gentle as a lamb with her. They would
+sit facing each other by the hour, and the
+artist swore they talked to each other and
+understood each other perfectly. The animal
+never attempted to harm her, but the
+artist became alarmed for fear there should
+be an accident, and believing that there was
+something uncanny about the brute, he decided
+to get rid of it and sold it to me.</p>
+
+<p>"Well, I watched her with the bear on
+shipboard and since we landed, and I can't
+yet understand her control over it, for it
+does not control her in any way. There
+seems to be a sympathy between them which
+makes them absolutely understand each
+other, and through it she understands the
+other caged beasts. The act which I had
+framed for her when I found that she was
+absolutely in earnest was a dance to be given
+in the midst of a group of adult lions. The<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_200" id="Page_200">[200]</a></span>
+lady is absolutely fearless and approved the
+plan, but stipulated that she should select
+the lions.</p>
+
+<p>"'I have means of knowing which ones
+will behave and which are such idiots that
+they can't be controlled if anything goes
+wrong,' she answered when I suggested that
+I was a better judge of the dispositions of
+the lions. 'I don't intend to have my beauty
+spoiled,' she said, 'and I only want beasts
+which are intelligent. No one can trust a
+fool.' Perhaps I have fallen under her influence,
+which according to her standard
+should indicate intelligence, for I have given
+way at every point and her judgment has
+proved correct, for in rehearsing the act she
+has perfect control over the animals, three of
+which I considered the most vicious in the
+menagerie. I let her take them in fear and
+trembling.</p>
+
+<p>"For the past three days she has been
+anxious and uneasy about the bear and has
+insisted that it was rapidly going blind. She
+says that the bear is her teacher about things
+in the animal world, and that she can tell<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_201" id="Page_201">[201]</a></span>
+what it is thinking about. Its eyes look perfectly
+sound, and it is only for two days that
+we have noticed anything wrong with it.
+Mephisto knew its way about its old cage so
+well that it gave no evidence of blindness,
+and a bear is naturally clumsy in its movements,
+but when we moved it to a strange
+den it stumbled over everything. I experimented
+by bringing Tramp in front of its
+cage, but with the loss of sight the hypnotic
+power has apparently deserted it, and the
+cat paid no attention to it. Finally I called
+in the doctor and you heard him pronounce
+his verdict."</p>
+
+<p>"But where is the great loss?" asked the
+Stranger.</p>
+
+<p>"It is principally a loss in prospective
+profits," replied the Proprietor as he beckoned
+to the waiter. "I had the new act all
+planned out for Paris&mdash;the lady was to appear
+masked for her performance, but I
+knew her identity would be discovered and
+that it would be a tremendous sensation. I
+don't know how much of her desire to train
+animals is due to eccentricity and as a protest<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_202" id="Page_202">[202]</a></span>
+against the conventions which hedged
+in her former life, and how much to her
+strange infatuation for Mephisto, but since
+its blindness has developed she has lost interest
+and I suppose she will renege on the
+whole business."</p>
+
+<p>"How do you account for it all&mdash;her infatuation
+for the bear and her intuitive
+knowledge of the dispositions of the lions?"
+asked the Stranger.</p>
+
+<p>"I don't try to account for anything. It
+is one of the thousand things about animals
+and the million things about women which
+no mere man can understand," replied the
+Proprietor laughing. "I have simply given
+you the facts of the situation and you can
+draw your own conclusions, but the bear's
+blindness upsets my plans and possibly prevents
+a sensation in circles which approach
+royalty."</p>
+
+<p>"Women <i>are</i> difficult to understand,"
+agreed the Press Agent as the Proprietor
+paused to moisten his throat, "and a man
+who is in love with one of 'em is just about
+as unaccountable for his actions. I had that<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_203" id="Page_203">[203]</a></span>
+fact engraved upon the tablets of my memory
+when a guy named Merritt and myself
+were running a dime museum in Pittsburg.
+Merritt was a good, hard-headed business
+man as a rule and he made a first-class lecturer;
+but when I found that he was taking
+to 'dropping into poetry' and delivering his
+descriptions of the freaks in verse, I began
+to get leary about the condition of the contents
+of his head. The poetry was always
+extemporaneous and was pretty bad, but it
+amused the crowd when it wasn't too sentimental.</p>
+
+<p>"As I say, the poetry was strictly on the
+bum, but what it lacked in quality it made
+up in quantity and he could spiel it off by
+the yard. Whenever he got stuck for a
+rhyme he would blow the whistle which he
+used to call the crowd in front of the freak
+he was lecturing about and move to the next
+platform. That didn't happen often, but
+whenever we had a Circassian Beauty
+among the freaks Merritt's poetry got so
+sentimental that no one but a bride and
+groom could stand for it&mdash;and it had to be<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_204" id="Page_204">[204]</a></span>
+early in the honeymoon at that. He would
+ring in turtle doves and azure skies and all
+the wishy-washy things in natural history
+and mythology and it was positively sickening.</p>
+
+<p>"He sure had a soft place in his heart for
+Circassian Beauties, and as they were as
+common as wire tappers on Broadway under
+a reform administration he was always getting
+sentimental. We used to get a new lot
+of freaks each week; our agent in New
+York engaged 'em and sent on the advertising
+matter ahead, and when we looked
+over the list I could see Merritt's face
+brighten up if there happened to be one of
+the fuzzy blondes included in the bunch.</p>
+
+<p>"Business was good, in spite of Merritt's
+poetry, so that I didn't kick when I saw that
+another one was coming. It was a good assortment:
+a Legless Wonder, The Man
+Who Breaks Paving Stones With His Bare
+Fists, a pair of Siamese Twins, a Leopard
+Boy and a particularly fuzzy Circassian
+Beauty. I saw Merritt's eyes grow soft
+when he looked at her photograph, and I<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_205" id="Page_205">[205]</a></span>
+prayed for a large proportion of the newly
+wedded among the audience that week.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 387px;"><a name="He_made_sheeps_eyes_and_threw_a_chest" id="He_made_sheeps_eyes_and_threw_a_chest"></a>
+<img src="images/036.png" width="387" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"He made sheep's eyes and threw a chest."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Well, Merritt starts in with the Stone
+Breaker and restrains himself pretty well;
+the only sentiment he got in was a fervent
+wish that 'a certain blonde beauty, with
+eyes of cerulean blue, would not break a<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_206" id="Page_206">[206]</a></span>
+heart which time would prove tender and
+true,' as ruthlessly as this man cracked
+rocks. He was gradually working up to
+the blonde, you understand, and he got
+warmer as he approached. The next one
+was the Legless Wonder, and he got a little
+tangled up in his comparisons when he
+sprung his poetry about him and tried to
+ring in the Circassian, and he had to blow
+his whistle like blazes to spare the blushes
+of the audience. The Siamese Twins gave
+him a good opening about 'bonds eternal'
+and the 'season vernal' and he didn't do a
+thing with it. The Leopard Boy was a
+cinch for him as he declaimed that</p>
+
+<div class="cpoem"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">"'They say that beauty is but skin deep.<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">And as you gaze upon this freak,<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">You will, I think, agree with me,<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">That though beneath he fair may be,<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">You'd much prefer to look the same<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">As the fair being who next will claim<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">Our admiration and attention,<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">With charms too numerous to mention.'<br /></span>
+</div></div></div>
+
+<p>"That made the Leopard Boy mad, for
+you know that freaks are as proud of their<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_207" id="Page_207">[207]</a></span>
+deformities as a mother is of a new baby,
+and look on normal people as objects of
+pity. But Merritt blew his whistle and
+passed on to the Circassian, and he made
+sheep's eyes and threw a chest as his fingers
+toyed with her peroxide locks. Say, it was
+sickening to listen to, and I saw that even
+the Stone Breaker was showing signs of
+distress and couldn't stand much of it. He
+bore up pretty well at first, while Merritt
+stuck to describing the 'golden locks and
+eyes of blue,' but when he got to the
+'sugar is sweet and so are you,' stage he
+commenced to get mad and moved over to
+the platform.</p>
+
+<p>"'Say, Mag,' says he, 'get down offen
+dat staige an' come away from de guy. It
+ain't in our contrac' dat we has ter stand for
+his gettin' soft on youse an' stringin' youse
+like dat. Come down, er I'll climb up an'
+break his face fer him.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Sure, Mike,' says the blonde, and
+climbs down. That made Merritt mad and
+he talks real English without any poetic
+frills for a minute. He allowed that he<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_208" id="Page_208">[208]</a></span>
+could lick any Stone Breaker that ever
+came off the Bowery, and when he started
+to prove it there was a mix-up which made
+the breaking up of 'The Society upon the
+Stanislaus' look like a fist fight between
+two Frenchmen. The walls were covered
+with curiosities from all over the world, and
+pretty soon they were flying through the
+air. Merritt yanked down an Indian war
+club and started for the Stone Breaker and
+somebody swatted him over the head with
+a mummy. The Legless Wonder couldn't
+join in, but he contributed a two-headed
+calf which was preserved in a jar of alcohol,
+and the Leopard Boy grabbed a bunch of
+Zulu spears and prodded every one in reach.
+Even the blonde was something of a scrapper
+and she mixed in with a miscellaneous
+assortment of stuffed animals and preserved
+specimens, to say nothing of some
+choice language which she hadn't learned
+in Circassia. The place was pretty well
+wrecked by the time the police arrived and
+separated the fighters.</p>
+
+<p>"'What's all this row about, anyway?'<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_209" id="Page_209">[209]</a></span>
+asks the sergeant after they had quieted
+things down.</p>
+
+<p>"'Dat guy was tryin' to get nex' to me
+wife, de Circassian Beaut',' answers the
+Stone Breaker. 'He spouts bum poetry
+about her, an' I won't stand fer it, see?
+Leave me go an' I'll crack his nut as easy
+as I would a pavin' stone.' Merritt had
+lots of fight left in him and tried to break
+loose, but the Circassian's remarks wilted
+him and I never knew him to use poetry
+again.</p>
+
+<p>"'Aw, wot's de use, Mike?' says she.
+'Youse can't crack a ting dat ain't hard,
+an' his sky-piece is made of mush.'"</p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_211" id="Page_211">[211]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS<br />
+AND THE<br />
+POWER OF HYPNOTISM</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_213" id="Page_213">[213]</a></span></p>
+<h2>THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS<br />
+AND THE<br />
+POWER OF HYPNOTISM</h2>
+
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="dcap">Chauncey Depew</span> was at the
+bottom of all the trouble; not the
+punctured senator from the state of
+New York, but his namesake, one of the
+handsomest double-striped royal Bengal
+tigers ever captured. Depew was the central
+figure in the group which Miller, the
+trainer of tigers, had worked so hard to educate,
+and it was his rebellion which made the
+teacher's labors of years come to naught.
+Late in the season, after months spent in
+giving the finishing touches to their education
+while they were with a small part of the
+show which was exhibited near Cleveland,
+the tigers were brought to Dreamland; a
+group of eight magnificent beasts, all jungle
+bred and each worthy of a place in any menagerie.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_214" id="Page_214">[214]</a></span>
+Perhaps it was the discomfort of
+the journey in the small traveling cages,
+possibly the change in the surroundings and
+the nearness of the other animals excited
+them; but whatever the cause, there was
+trouble in the narrow runway at the back of
+the dens when they entered it to go to the
+exhibition cage for their first Coney Island
+appearance.</p>
+
+<p>The sound of their snarling and growling,
+the reports of pistol shots and the
+cracking of training whips caused a sensation
+of uneasiness in the audience until the
+first tiger bounded through the door at the
+back of the cage, closely followed by a half-dozen
+others. Dangerous beasts they looked
+as they threw themselves against the stout
+bars, which rattled from the impact of their
+great bodies, and the front seats of the auditorium
+were quickly vacated by the audience.
+The noise in the runway continued,
+but the deep throaty growls which came
+from behind the dens were of a different
+quality from the snarling and yapping
+of the seven beasts in the exhibition cage,<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_215" id="Page_215">[215]</a></span>
+and when the last of the tigers appeared in
+the doorway the first arrivals made renewed
+efforts to escape through the bars.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 422px;"><a name="The_first_tiger_bounded_through_the_door" id="The_first_tiger_bounded_through_the_door"></a>
+<img src="images/037.png" width="422" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"The first tiger bounded through the door."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>It was Depew; not the good-natured-looking
+great cat whose "I-have-eaten-the-canary"
+expression and smug whiskers had
+suggested his name, but a jungle tiger who
+had "gone bad," as the animal trainers call
+it, and who stood for a moment in the doorway,
+wrathfully surveying his frantic companions
+and selecting a victim. Froth was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_216" id="Page_216">[216]</a></span>
+dripping from his snarling lips, his small
+eyes were blazing like two points of flame,
+the hair on his neck and back stood up like
+bristles, and his great tail struck the door-casing
+resounding whacks, as he lashed it
+from side to side. Only a moment he stood
+there, and then the great striped body hurtled
+through the air as if shot from a catapult,
+and covering a good twenty feet in the
+spring it landed fair on Bombay, one of the
+largest tigers in the group. The aim was a
+true one and the sound of breaking bone
+mingled with a scream of pain from his victim,
+as Bombay sank under the weight of
+the blow, his cervical vertebr&aelig; crushed between
+Depew's powerful jaws.</p>
+
+<p>The door had been closed behind Depew
+when he made his spring, and the other
+tigers were chasing madly about the great
+cage, looking for a chance to escape. There
+was no desire to fight left in them, but when
+they collided with each other they snapped
+and struck with the instinct of self-preservation,
+their sharp claws and teeth cutting
+gashes in the sleek striped coats. It was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_217" id="Page_217">[217]</a></span>
+evident that all training had been forgotten,
+that fear of anything so puny as man had
+departed from the minds of the tigers, and
+a groan went up from the audience when
+the door was opened and quickly closed behind
+Miller, the trainer, who stood, whip and
+training rod in hand, in the cage with the
+maddened animals. He went about his
+work as quietly as if it were only an ordinary
+performance, his object being to return his
+pupils to their dens before further damage
+was done and to try to make them recognize
+that they were obeying him.</p>
+
+<p>Depew was still crouched on the body of
+his victim, biting at the neck and growling
+ferociously, his tail lashing from side to side.
+Miller never took his eyes from him and
+kept between him and the door as he called
+the others by name and tried to regain control
+of them. One tiger after another was
+released, glad of the opportunity to escape,
+as the door to the runway was opened at
+Miller's signal, until only Depew, the body
+of Bombay and the trainer occupied the
+cage.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_218" id="Page_218">[218]</a></span></p>
+
+<p>The other tigers had entered into a general
+free fight in the runway, but the noise
+of their bickering was unheeded in the excitement
+of the contest in the exhibition
+cage. Depew rose as Miller cracked his
+whip and approached him, and made a rush
+which the trainer met with his pronged training
+rod, driving it hard between the widely
+opened jaws while his whip rained blows
+upon the tiger's face. But he was only
+checked for a moment, and under his fiercer
+attack the trainer was forced to give ground.
+They were so close that the tiger could not
+spring, but he struck savagely with his great
+forepaws and tried again and again to pass
+the guard which Miller maintained with the
+training rod, using it as a fencer uses a foil.
+It was an unequal contest and the trainer
+realized that he was beaten; Depew would
+not be driven from the cage. The useless
+training whip was discarded and a savage
+rush from the tiger was met by a pistol
+shot in the face, blank cartridge, of course,
+but effective for a moment. Five more shots
+followed in quick succession and the trainer<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_219" id="Page_219">[219]</a></span>
+backed quickly toward the door, when his
+foot slipped, he was on his back, and Depew,
+quick to seize the advantage, stood over him.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 385px;"><a name="Depew_was_still_crouched_on_the_body_of_his_victim" id="Depew_was_still_crouched_on_the_body_of_his_victim"></a>
+<img src="images/038.png" width="385" height="500" alt="" title="" />
+"Depew was still crouched on the body of his victim."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>Every keeper connected with the show
+stood about the cage with the Roman candles,
+fire extinguishers, pistols and irons
+which are always kept in readiness, and any
+or all of them would have willingly entered
+to rescue the man, but experience has taught<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_220" id="Page_220">[220]</a></span>
+them that two cannot work together in a
+cage with animals. They were quick to
+act and a stream of water under heavy
+pressure from the fire hose struck the
+tiger in the side, exploding fireworks
+scorched his skin, the din of revolver shots
+was in his ears, while the wads from the
+cartridges stung him, but he seemed conscious
+only of the prostrate form beneath
+him. At last his chance had come; the
+trainer who for long months had made
+him do foolish things which were beneath
+the dignity of a royal tiger was in his power;
+the revolver which had so often checked him
+was emptied; the cruel training rod was
+powerless, for the hand which held it was
+pinned to the floor by a huge paw. Cat-like
+he paused to glory in his triumph, loath to
+give the <i>coup de gr&acirc;ce</i> which would put his
+victim beyond the reach of suffering, and he
+stood there growling, the bloody slaver from
+his jaws dripping on the upturned face of
+the prostrate man.</p>
+
+<p>Animal trainers need to think quickly and
+to seize the slightest moment of hesitation or<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_221" id="Page_221">[221]</a></span>
+indecision on the part of their pupils if they
+wish to be long-lived, and Miller, as he fell,
+had thrown his useless pistol out of the cage
+and uttered the one word "Load!" There
+was no time for that, but Tudor, seeing that
+the trainer had one arm free, threw his own
+pistol through the bars and it slid across the
+floor of the cage straight as a die to the outstretched
+hand. It was a time when fractions
+of a second count and Depew's hesitation
+robbed him of his revenge. The opened
+jaws were within a foot of the trainer's
+throat when the muzzle of the pistol went between
+them, and Depew, coughing and
+choking, drew back, his throat scorched by
+the burning powder, his eyes momentarily
+blinded by the stream from a fire extinguisher,
+while Miller struggled to his feet.</p>
+
+<p>"People who see the crowds at my show
+think that I must coin money," said the Proprietor
+as he joined the Press Agent and the
+Stranger after the performance. "But that
+accident in the Arena to-night means a loss
+of fifty thousand dollars to me."</p>
+
+<p>"Isn't that a high figure, even if they all<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_222" id="Page_222">[222]</a></span>
+die?" asked the Stranger, who had been doing
+a little mental arithmetic.</p>
+
+<p>"For those eight, yes, although a trained
+tiger is worth all sorts of money, but I have
+purchased twenty-eight in all for that
+group, and the others have been killed one
+by one, fighting among themselves. They
+average over a thousand apiece, for I bought
+only the best, and figure up the cost of their
+keep, transportation and trainer's salaries
+for three years and you will find that I am
+not far out. That is the difficulty of the
+show business in America, the public demands
+so much. It is a marvelous thing,
+when you come to think of it, to see one educated
+tiger; but if he wore evening clothes
+and played the fiddle it wouldn't impress the
+Americans; they would demand a full orchestra.
+I can give an act an hour long in
+Paris with one high school horse, but here
+they want fifty liberty horses in a bunch and
+only care to watch them for ten minutes. I
+realized that from Bonavita's act with the
+lions; no individual lion did very much, but
+the fact that there were twenty-seven of<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_223" id="Page_223">[223]</a></span>
+them in the cage drew the crowds. That's
+what made me start in with the tigers, and I
+intended to get a big group, but now I am
+back where I started from. I don't believe
+a troupe of tigers can ever be trained."</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="Depew_coughing_and_choking_drew_back" id="Depew_coughing_and_choking_drew_back"></a>
+<img src="images/039.png" width="650" height="478" alt="" title="" />
+"Depew, coughing and choking, drew back."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"Hagenbeck has them," ventured the
+Stranger. "They seem as tame as kittens
+with his show."</p>
+
+<p>"That's just the point," answered the
+Proprietor. "They are as tame as kittens:<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_224" id="Page_224">[224]</a></span>
+undersized brutes which have been raised in
+captivity and which go through their act like
+domestic cats. That isn't what the public
+wants. A sensation&mdash;the realization that
+every animal in the cage is a wild animal and
+that he is liable to remember it at any minute&mdash;is
+what holds attention. That is why I
+always use jungle animals when I can get
+them, for, although they can be as well
+trained, they always perform under protest
+and it makes it exciting. But the losses
+from fighting among themselves make it
+mighty expensive to keep up the big groups
+which the American public demands."</p>
+
+<p>"That's one of the things which drove me
+out of the show business," said the Press
+Agent as he set his empty glass on the table
+and signaled to the waiter. "A guy named
+Merritt and myself had a snake show in
+New York a few years ago which presented
+the most complete collection of reptiles ever
+gotten together, for it contained specimens
+of every species of wriggler known to herpetology
+and a good many that were not described
+in the books. That man Merritt was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_225" id="Page_225">[225]</a></span>
+an inventive genius and had the California
+sharp, Burbank, beaten a mile when it came
+to inventing new species. When business
+was dull he'd take a lot of common, ordinary
+snakes into the back room and with a bottle
+of peroxide of hydrogen and an assortment
+of aniline dyes he would bring out albinos
+and spotted and striped snakes which made
+the scientists open their eyes and kept 'em
+busy inventing new Latin names.</p>
+
+<p>"His biggest success was 'The Great
+Two-horned Rhinoceros Serpent,' which
+made 'em all sit up for a month, and if I
+hadn't seen Merritt working over a common
+boa-constrictor with a pair of shark's teeth
+and a dish of bird lime it would have fooled
+me. That snake was proud of the horns
+which Merritt glued on his head, too, and he
+used to chase the other snakes around the
+cage and butt 'em like a giddy billy-goat.
+But in spite of all his ingenuity in originating
+new varieties, business was dropping
+off, for the public demanded quantity as
+well as quality and we had skinned the local
+snake market clean. We were sitting in the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_226" id="Page_226">[226]</a></span>
+office one day, figuring on where we could
+get additions to our collection, when a stout,
+red-faced little man who had 'sea captain'
+written all over him came in and asked if we
+wanted any more snakes. Merritt allowed
+that we did if the snakes and the prices were
+right and asked where we could inspect
+them.</p>
+
+<p>"'Well, I've got one that I brought from
+Borneo and he's on a ship down in the harbor,'
+says the Captain. 'We won't argue
+none about the price, for if you'll come down
+and take him away you can have him for
+nothing.' That made Merritt a little suspicious
+and he asked the Captain if it were
+his ship.</p>
+
+<p>"'I reckoned it was until two days ago,
+when that blame snake broke loose,' he answered
+irritably. 'Since then he seems to
+own it and not a man jack of the crew will
+go below. I've tried to shoot him, but the
+beggar's too quick, and I want to discharge
+my cargo, so if you ain't afraid to tackle
+him, come on.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Me afraid! Me?' says Merritt throwing<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_227" id="Page_227">[227]</a></span>
+out a chest. 'Why, man alive, I'm the
+only living snake charmer who ever dared
+handle the dangerous Two-horned Rhinoceros
+Serpent, and do you think I'd weaken
+before a common Borneo python?'</p>
+
+<p>"'I dunno whether you will or not until
+I see you try,' says the Captain. 'I've handled
+a Malay crew, which is worse than
+serpents, and I've mixed it up with most of
+the scum that sails the seven seas, but this
+blame snake's got me bluffed all right.
+He's three fathom long, as big around as the
+mainmast, and made up principally of
+muscle and wickedness.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Just watch me. Watch me!' says Merritt.
+'I'll use my wonderful hypnotic power
+and you'll see the serpent crawl into the bag
+at my command, to be easily transported to
+this moral and elevating show for exhibition
+as an example of the power of mind over
+matter.'</p>
+
+<p>"'All right, professor,' says the Captain.
+'But if you'll take my advice you'll stow
+those shore-going togs and get into working
+rig before you tackle him.' Merritt was<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_228" id="Page_228">[228]</a></span>
+arrayed in all his finery, and if you'd ever
+seen him you'd know that that meant a lot,
+for when he was flush he could make Solomon
+in all his glory, or any other swell
+dresser look like a dirty deuce in a new deck.
+He had on a light suit with checks which
+were so loud they drowned the music of the
+orchestra, and a shirt which would make a
+summer sunset hide its head in disappointment.
+Patent leather shoes with yellow tops
+and a white plug hat with a black band
+around it completed his costume, except for
+a few specimens of yellow diamonds which
+adorned his shirt front and cuffs.</p>
+
+<p>"Merritt snorted contemptuously at the
+suggestion and we started for the ship.
+When we got on board he made a little
+speech before he went into the hold, telling
+the sailors about his wonderful hypnotic
+power and how he would exercise it to charm
+the serpent which was preventing their
+worthy Captain from reaping the rewards
+of his arduous toil and his hardihood in having
+braved the perils of the vasty deep. The
+sailors listened and grinned, but the Captain<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_230" id="Page_230">[230]</a></span>
+was getting impatient and suggested that
+Merritt get the snake first and give his spiel
+afterward, so Merritt went down the ladder
+with the bag over his shoulder and we all
+rubbered down the hatchway to watch the
+capture.</p>
+
+
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 650px;"><a name="Page_229" id="Page_229"></a>
+<img src="images/040.png" width="650" height="337" alt="" title="" />
+"Merritt was quick enough to get a strangle hold around the snake's neck."</div>
+
+
+
+<p>"I knew what he would try to do, for I
+had seen him work it before. The way to
+get one of those big snakes is to cover his
+head with a bag, and then he'll crawl in himself
+to get into the dark, which is a serpent's
+idea of safety. The more you prod 'em the
+faster they'll crawl, and that was the time
+when Merritt always made passes with his
+hands and muttered gibberish to impress the
+spectators. He started in according to programme
+as soon as he located the snake,
+which was half hidden among a lot of casks.
+The snake carried out his part and struck at
+the opened bag which Merritt held out to
+him, but instead of sticking his head in he
+grabbed it with his teeth, and as Merritt held
+on he drew him back among the barrels and
+there was a pretty fight. Merritt was quick
+enough to get a strangle hold around the<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_231" id="Page_231">[231]</a></span>
+snake's neck and then it kept him busy keeping
+out of his coils. The Captain hadn't lied
+much about the size of the python&mdash;it was
+about thirty feet long&mdash;and Merritt didn't
+have time to use any incantation, although
+considerable forcible language floated up
+through the hatchway. They wiped the
+deck with each other for about twenty minutes,
+and Merritt had been bumped against
+pretty nearly every cask in the hold before
+he finally succeeded in drawing the sack over
+the snake's head. Then it was easy, and in
+spite of his lack of breath the showman in
+Merritt asserted itself. He put the sack on
+the floor, and with one foot on the neck of
+it he prodded the snake's body with the other
+while he made mysterious passes with his
+hands until the tip of the tail disappeared.
+When the sack was securely tied up the
+python was hoisted on deck, and Merritt, his
+clothing torn and soiled with pitch and the
+miscellaneous oily and sticky things which
+made up the ship's cargo, climbed up after it.</p>
+
+<p>"'Did you see me?' he asked proudly,
+throwing out his chest. 'Did you observe<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_232" id="Page_232">[232]</a></span>
+the wonderful hypnotic power which overcame
+the prowess of the serpent?'</p>
+
+<p>"'Yes, I noticed it, along toward the
+finish,' answered the Captain, grinning
+skeptically as he sized up Merritt's dilapidated
+apparel. 'But say, professor, what I
+can't understand is why you didn't get it
+working sooner.'"</p>
+
+
+<p class="hd1">THE END</p>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Side Show Studies, by Francis Metcalfe
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@@ -0,0 +1,3531 @@
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Side Show Studies, by Francis Metcalfe
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Side Show Studies
+
+Author: Francis Metcalfe
+
+Illustrator: Oliver Herford
+
+Release Date: November 19, 2007 [EBook #23542]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SIDE SHOW STUDIES ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Stephen Blundell and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
+produced from images generously made available by The
+Internet Archive/American Libraries.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+               SIDE SHOW
+                STUDIES
+
+
+                   BY
+            FRANCIS METCALFE
+
+
+ _ILLUSTRATED WITH MANY AMUSING DRAWINGS
+            BY OLIVER HERFORD_
+
+
+                NEW YORK
+      THE OUTING PUBLISHING COMPANY
+                  1906
+
+
+
+
+ Copyright, 1905 and 1906, by
+ THE OUTING PUBLISHING COMPANY
+
+ First impression, March, 1906
+
+
+ THE OUTING PRESS
+ DEPOSIT, N. Y.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+
+                                                              PAGE
+
+ THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ AND THE REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY           1
+
+ THE BITE OF A RATTLER AND THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE             23
+
+ THE AMOROUS BABOON                                             45
+
+ FEEDING THE SERPENTS AND A GRAND TRANSFORMATION                67
+
+ THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE AND THE INCONSIDERATE PYTHON           89
+
+ THE ANIMAL BAROMETER AND THE ETERNAL FEMININE                 113
+
+ MAKING A STAR LION AND AN INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE MEETING      137
+
+ KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT                                       163
+
+ THE HYPNOTIC BEAR AND THE SENTIMENTAL LECTURER                183
+
+ THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS AND THE POWER OF HYPNOTISM          211
+
+
+
+
+THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ AND THE REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY
+
+
+
+
+THE LIBERTY OF FRANZ AND THE REBELLION OF FUZZY WUZZY
+
+
+Madame Morelli, the pretty little Frenchwoman who makes a half-score of
+leopards, panthers and jaguars do things which nature never intended
+them to do, had finished her act and driven the snarling performers
+through the narrow runway to their separate cages, fastening each one,
+as she thought, securely. Two French clowns were filling in the time and
+making the audience of Coney Island pleasure seekers laugh by their
+antics with a performing dog, while the stage hands were bringing in the
+properties for the next trained animal act, when the Proprietor came
+from behind the scenes and strolled, apparently unconcerned, to the back
+of the Arena, where he could command a clear view of the performance,
+the audience and the cages. He said a few words to each of the trainers
+and keepers whom he passed, and the Stranger, who knew the clock-like
+regularity with which each one of them went through his allotted duties,
+noticed an unwonted haste and suppressed excitement among them.
+
+As he joined the Proprietor the sound of hammering mingled with the
+noise of the blatant brass band and the cries of the ballyhoo spielers
+for the other Dreamland attractions, which came in through the open
+windows, and he saw that Stevenson, the mild eyed quiet man who is
+always on hand to rescue imperiled trainers and keepers when their own
+carelessness, or unexpected revolt on the part of the animals, leads to
+a fight, was rapidly nailing boards over the ventilating spaces above
+the cages. Madam Morelli, whip and training rod in hand, hurried from
+her dressing room to the runway, and every keeper and trainer seemed to
+be loitering in the space between the leopards' den and the audience.
+
+He looked at the Proprietor inquiringly, but the little trickle of
+blood which ran down his cheek from under his cap answered the question
+he would have asked, an animal was loose and the Proprietor had
+encountered it in his rounds. A crash of weird music from the band
+drowned the sound of a cracking whip and sharp commands which came from
+the runway, and announced the appearance of Brandu, the snake charmer,
+in the exhibition cage, and the audience watched him play with a cobra,
+all unconscious that Franz, the jaguar, which a few minutes before had
+desisted from his attempt to tear the fair shoulders of Morelli only
+after a dozen blank cartridges had been fired in his face, was a
+gentleman-at-large in Dreamland. The Proprietor gave a sigh of relief as
+the jaguar backed into his cage from the runway, snarling and striking
+at the little woman who forced him backward with the whip until she was
+able to slam the door and make him once more a prisoner. When she passed
+them on her way back to the dressing-room, her dress was torn, and her
+eyes were flashing from the excitement of the encounter and anger at the
+carelessness of the carpenter who had left a board loose at the top of
+the den.
+
+[Illustration: _The table in front of the Arena._]
+
+"Of course, that might have been a serious thing for the jaguar and for
+my pocket book," said the Proprietor as three deep scratches in his head
+were being plastered up. "I couldn't afford to take any chances of an
+accident, and he would have been shot if he had attempted to come
+through a ventilator into the Arena, but a trained animal like that is
+worth a goodish bit of money. He let me know he was loose by giving me
+his love pat when I was walking through the runway, and as Morelli is
+the only one who can do anything with him I sent for her. She can whip
+considerably more than her own weight in wild-cats, and there was not
+the slightest danger to the audience, but not many men would have
+relished her task of going into that passage with the beast loose on top
+of the cages." He negatived the Press Agent's suggestion to make a
+scare-head story of the escape for the papers, and suggested that they
+should go up and hear Madam Morelli's account of it. She was sitting on
+the edge of her bed, mending a rip which the jaguar's sharp claws had
+made in her gown, and she shrugged her shoulders when the Stranger
+inquired if she had been hurt.
+
+[Illustration: _Two French clowns and a performing dog._]
+
+"It was nothing," she said laughing. "He jumped at me from the top of a
+cage when I came in, but I beat him off and whipped him back into his
+cage. It was only the close quarters which made it bad, for I am used to
+fighting them." She was interrupted by a yapping and caterwauling in the
+doorway, and sprang on the bed, her face white with terror, as a small
+terrier and the menagerie cat rolled into the room in a clawing, biting
+mix-up. The terrier was raising a litter of puppies in the next room,
+and the cat had transformed the space back of Morelli's bed into a
+feline nursery, and a meeting of the two anxious mothers in the hall had
+led to trouble. Madam Morelli always goes through her performance in an
+evening dress, and she stood on the bed, her long train gathered closely
+about her, trembling like a leaf, when the Proprietor finally separated
+the combatants and restored peace.
+
+"You wouldn't think that a woman who had just come from a fight with a
+two hundred pound jaguar, which could easily tear her to pieces, would
+be scared at a scrap between a toy terrier and a mongrel cat," said the
+Proprietor, laughing, as he led the way to the cafe table. "But she
+makes a specialty of the larger species."
+
+"This matter of specialties seems to run through every branch of the
+show business," said the Press Agent as they took their seats at the
+table. "I ran a dime museum in St. Louis a few years ago--in those days
+there was lots of money in it--and the freaks would never stand for any
+change in their billing. We used to have a fresh lot sent on by our New
+York agent every two weeks, and one Monday morning when I went down to
+look over the new arrivals, I knew that he had been up against the demon
+Rum, when he engaged such a tough looking bunch. The alleged fat woman
+looked as if she was wasting away with consumption, and the bearded lady
+had a way of absentmindedly humming the popular airs in a bass voice
+which gave the whole snap away. There was one likely looking girl and
+when I asked her what she was she told me she was the web-footed lady
+and showed me her feet, which had little pieces of skin growing between
+the toes.
+
+"I knew that wasn't good enough, so I told her she was mistaken; that
+she was a Circassian beauty, and I gave her a wig and the fixings and
+put her on the platform. But say, would you believe it? She was so mad
+and embarrassed by the change in her stunt that when the lecturer was
+calling attention to her blond beauty, she would blush until she looked
+like an Indian Princess, and every time he turned his back she would
+take off her shoes and wiggle her toes at the audience to show what she
+really was.
+
+[Illustration: _"Things which Nature never intended them to do."_]
+
+"It was up to us to get some real attraction to tide over the time until
+our agent should get sober and send us another bunch of freaks, so
+Merritt, who was my partner, and myself hunted up a big buck nigger and
+made a deal with him to go on as a 'Wild Man.' We ripped up a hair
+mattress and glued the contents onto him, and wired a couple of big
+tusks to his teeth, and with an iron collar around his neck and a log
+chain around his waist he was as good an imitation as was ever faked. We
+put him in a big cage which we had used the week before for a mangy old
+lion; one of the five hundred or so 'Wallace the Untamables' which were
+touring the country, and Merritt taught him to howl like a steam
+calliope.
+
+"We called him 'Fuzzy Wuzzy, the Terrible Man-Eating Cannibal,' which
+was a waste of words, but Merritt had language to burn. He had got hold
+of a phony five hundred dollar bill, and when he was giving his spiel
+about how Fuzzy Wuzzy was captured upon a desert island, where he was
+found chewing a human leg, and how he couldn't eat anything but raw
+meat, and was always trying to get at his keeper for dessert, he would
+wave his phony five hundred spot over his head and give it to 'em good.
+
+"'Five hundred dollars, ladies and gents, I will give to any man who
+will remain for the short space of two minutes in the cage with Fuzzy
+Wuzzy! Five hundred dollars to any man who is brave enough to run the
+risk of letting this terrible man-eating cannibal get his hinder limbs
+about him, for then all would be lost and Fuzzy Wuzzy would fasten his
+terrible fangs in his victim's throat and suck his ber-lud.'
+
+"Well, it was a good spiel, all right, all right, and when Merritt
+struck that part one of the supers would prod up old Fuzzy, who would
+rattle his chains and howl for fair, and the audience would get cold
+chills down their backs. We were playing to the S. R. O., and giving so
+many shows a day that Merritt pretty nearly lost his voice, and Fuzzy
+had been prodded so much that he had to take his meals standing up. We
+ran 'em through pretty fast, and one afternoon Merritt was just going to
+give the 'All out' signal, which cleared the exhibition hall for the
+next performance, when up steps a big husky black roustabout from the
+levee and commences to strip off his coat.
+
+"'Jes' a minit, boss,' says he. 'Ah reckon ah needs dat five hundred in
+mah bizness,' and Merritt looks at him in astonishment.
+
+"'My deluded colored brother,' says he, 'Do you appreciate the fact that
+you are going to a certain and horrible death? If this terrible Fuzzy
+Wuzzy gets his hinder limbs about you he will suck your ber-lud.'
+
+"'Ah doan reckon he'll git me, an' ah suttenly needs de money,' answers
+the coon, and continues to strip, and Merritt sizes him up and sees the
+finish of Fuzzy Wuzzy, who was shaking the bars and trying to get away
+from the super who was prodding him; but everybody thought he was trying
+to get at the coon to make a meal of him, and some of the women folks
+were getting hysterics. One of the boys had put me wise, and I broke
+through the crowd and called a halt in the proceedings.
+
+"'Ladies and gentlemen,' says I, 'I didn't believe that a man existed
+who was foolhardy enough to be tempted to certain death by the lure of
+a paltry five hundred dollars. But although this man is so reckless of
+his own life, I must insist that he get a permit from the mayor,
+relieving us from all responsibility, before we allow him to be torn
+limb from limb. Return to-morrow at two o'clock, and if this man's
+courage still keeps up, you will see before your shuddering eyes an
+encounter which will make the historical gladiatorial combats of ancient
+Rome pale into insignificance.' I could sling a few language myself,
+those days, and the mayor was a friend of mine--or I thought he was--so
+I figured we could catch the suckers for an admission and then call it
+off, because he would refuse a permit.
+
+[Illustration: _"Blank cartridges fired in his face."_]
+
+"But he was onto the game and he was one of those blame fools who
+thought he had a sense of humor, so he gives him a document with a big
+red seal on it which looks like a doctor's diploma, which says that
+Thomas Jefferson is allowed to go in and win our five hundred, and the
+next day the coon shows up smiling and ready, and I knew we had to make
+good somehow. I passed the word to Merritt to delay the game and make a
+last grand effort to throw a scare into the coon, and he put up a spiel
+to beat the band.
+
+"'This terrible Fuzzy Wuzzy has none of the attributes of a human
+being,' says he. 'He lives upon raw meat and would prefer human flesh if
+he could get it. Observe the expression of ghoulish glee in his eyes as
+he regards the foolhardy man who will soon furnish him such a meal as he
+formerly enjoyed in his native jungle. He sleeps at night suspended from
+the top bars of his cage by his claw-like hands and feet, which will
+soon be tearing the flesh of this man who stands before you now, a
+picture of perfect health and strength. He speaks no intelligible
+language, but he utters howls and yells, which will be more horrible
+than ever before when he is sucking the warm heart's be-lud of the
+figure which you see before you for the last time in human shape.' Just
+then the super gives Fuzzy a prod and he howls like Balaam's ass, but
+the coon stands there smiling and not feazed a bit.
+
+"'It's a sad sight,' continues Merritt, 'to see a fine man in the prime
+of life, like our colored brother here, crushed into an unrecognizable
+mass by the terrible hinder limbs of this man-eating cannibal and then
+torn to shreds by his horrible fangs. The management of this highly
+moral and intellectual show will provide a funeral for the remains, if
+there are any, and now, ladies and gents, I call upon you to witness
+that we are not responsible for the terrible end which awaits this
+reckless man.'
+
+"I had taken the precaution to button up the box office 'take' in my
+inside pocket, and while Merritt was making a bluff at looking for the
+key to the cage door I looked around to see that there was a free exit,
+for the coon was standing there swelling out his chest and grinning as
+if he had the five hundred already in his jeans, and I knew he couldn't
+be bluffed out. Just then a typical antebellum Missourian, one of the
+kind that has to be shown, steps up in front. He was tanked up until his
+safety valve would have blown off if it hadn't been wired down, but he
+was pretty steady on his pins when he held onto the railing in front of
+the cage.
+
+[Illustration: _"Five hundred dollars to any one who will enter the
+cage."_]
+
+"'Professah,' says he, 'did I undahstand yo' all correctly to say that
+this yeah object in the cage has none of the attributes of the human
+race?'
+
+"'Correct!' says Merritt, glad of an excuse to delay things. 'He is
+lower than the beasts of the field.'
+
+"'Well, he suttenly aint much to look at,' says the Southerner, looking
+him over carefully. 'He won't eat like folks--he can't talk--an' he
+sleeps like a bat. I dunno why such a pusillanimous critter should
+cumber the yearth,' and with that he puts his hand to his hip and pulls
+out a forty-five from under the tails of his coat. Fuzzy takes one look
+at it, and it didn't need any prodding to make him holler, and he tries
+to tear off the false tusks.
+
+"'Foh Gawd's sake, mistah, doan shoot!' he yells. 'Dat white mahn's been
+tellin' a passel ob lies about me until ah's sartain suah somefing gwine
+fer to git me. Ah can eat an' talk like any one, an' mos' ebery one
+knows me about yeah wen ah ain't got dese yeah contraptions on.'
+
+"'Shut up, you blame fool!' says Merritt. 'He won't shoot you.'
+
+"'Mebbe he knows dat, mebbe you knows dat; but how does I know dat?'
+yells Fuzzy. 'Dat gun suttenly looks big to me.'
+
+"About this time the other coon got wise and saw the five hundred
+vanishing, and the last I saw of Merritt he was trying to break a
+half-Nelson that the coon had got on him and dodge the rest of the crowd
+at the same time. I left St. Louis on a freight that night, wearing a
+few lumps where some stray brickbats landed, and the next time I saw
+Merritt was in Chicago, and he was on crutches and had his head covered
+with plaster."
+
+No thunderbolt dropped from the blue dome over the Dreamland tower, and
+the Proprietor, with a childlike and bland smile on his face, motioned
+to the waiter to refill the glasses.
+
+
+
+
+THE BITE OF A RATTLER AND THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE
+
+
+
+
+THE BITE OF A RATTLER AND THE SAD FATE OF BIG PETE
+
+
+Like the pitcher which went to the well until it met the proverbial
+fate, the trainer entered the lion's den once too often, and what
+remained of him was placed in an ambulance and taken to the hospital.
+After the performance for the evening was over, Baltimore, the bad lion,
+who had suddenly developed a craving for human flesh, had been dealt
+with by the Proprietor of the menagerie in a manner which would spoil
+his appetite for many a day to come and make him remember that trainers
+cannot be mangled with impunity.
+
+Most of the lights were extinguished at Dreamland, but two men sat at
+the table in front of the Arena with the Proprietor, discussing the
+accident and listening to stories of former encounters which he
+related. His own body bears the scars of many a battle with his savage
+charges, but he has discontinued giving personal exhibitions with them
+in the large cage, because his wife has developed a prejudice against
+having him brought to her in fragments, and he has found that the
+training of trainers is a far more difficult task than the education of
+wild animals.
+
+"Yes, any man who follows this business carries his life in his hands,"
+he said in answer to a question from the Stranger within the gates. "You
+helped to care for poor Bonavita to-night, after Baltimore finished with
+him, so you know what a lion's jaws can do. I've seen 'em chewed up as
+bad as that and get over it, but they never get quite the same again.
+Leave the business? No; it is like the sea: a man who takes to it keeps
+it up until the time comes when he doesn't recover, but after a bad
+accident he usually takes another breed of animals.
+
+"The worst sight I ever saw was about five years ago, when one of our
+performing bears turned on its trainer and seized his arm. He worried
+it as a terrier would a bone for a good twenty minutes before we could
+drive him off, and the bear died from the punishment we gave him. The
+man's arm isn't much use to him now, but he is crazy for me to give him
+another group of animals to train, which I can't do because a man needs
+two good pairs of limbs when he gets into the exhibition cage." He told
+of many accidents which had happened to himself and his employees, most
+of them through their own carelessness, born of constant association
+with their charges who never miss the opportunity which the shortest
+instant of forgetfulness gives them.
+
+[Illustration: _"A constant procession of small animals moving down his
+throat."_]
+
+"I said that bear attack was the worst sight I ever saw, and it was; but
+something happened here last year which impressed me more because it was
+so mysterious. A friend of mine in Florida shipped me a box of rattlers,
+which he wrote had been 'attended to,' and I supposed that their poison
+fangs had been extracted. They were delivered just before the
+performance started and I ripped a board off the box and stuck my hand
+in, grabbing them one by one and throwing them into the den as if they
+were garter snakes.
+
+"The man who took care of the snakes was out on the ballyhoo, walking
+around with the gander following him to advertise the show; and when he
+came in he looked them over and found that each one had as pretty a pair
+of fangs as you would wish to see. He told me about it and I confess
+that it gave me a gone feeling in the pit of my stomach, for I
+remembered how I had felt around for them in the box with my bare
+hands.
+
+"I am pretty busy while a performance is going on, so I told him to let
+them alone until I had a chance to examine them. Ninety per cent. of the
+accidents which occur in a menagerie comes from the disregard of
+ordinary precautions or the disobedience of orders, and I had a
+presentiment that something was going to happen and I was keeping an
+extra vigilant eye on the performers in the big exhibition cage. Well,
+it happened, all right; but not in the way that I expected.
+
+"The snake man instead of getting back on the ballyhoo where he
+belonged, stood around the snake cage, watching the new rattlers, and
+along came a couple of gazabos who commenced talking about them. One of
+them was the wise guy, who always knows about how the animals are doped
+so they won't bite and all that other information which isn't so. He
+commenced explaining how the snakes were harmless, because their teeth
+had been pulled, and giving a lot of misinformation about them. The
+snake man listened until he couldn't stand it any longer and then he
+stuck his hand into the cage and grabbed one of the rattlers by the
+neck.
+
+"'Fangs pulled, eh?' says he, and he made the rattler open his mouth and
+show a perfect pair of stingers. The wise guy took one look at them and
+fled, and the snake man would have carried it off all right, only he was
+so busy calling a few choice names after him that he placed the snake
+back in the cage instead of throwing it in, and the rattler struck him
+before he could draw his hand out. He had a clown make-up on, so I
+couldn't tell whether he was pale or not when he came to me a few
+minutes later and held out his hand, but there was a queer expression on
+his face and I knew that my apprehensions had not been groundless.
+
+"There were just two little red dots, no bigger than pin heads, on the
+back of his hand.
+
+"'You got it, didn't you?' says I.
+
+"'Good and plenty,' says he. 'My arm hurts me already.'
+
+"We got busy right away and took him up to the hospital where Bonavita
+is now. Say, he was a very thin man and you can see that I'm no
+lightweight; but by midnight the right side of his body and his right
+arm and leg were swollen to my size, and in the morning all of the
+swollen part was as black as a coal. He was suffering terribly, and I
+tried to get hold of the Arab snake doctor but couldn't locate him, so I
+wired to Rochester for Rattlesnake Pete. He came down and a mighty
+interesting man he is, but he couldn't do anything which 'Doc' up at the
+hospital hadn't done, and it was five days before my man was out of
+danger. He was not a drinking man--I finished having drunkards around my
+show a good many years ago--and the whiskey took right hold of him and
+pulled him through. 'Doc' kept squirting some red stuff into his arm,
+but it was the 'red-eye' which saved him--and that reminds me."
+
+[Illustration: _"The wise guy."_]
+
+He beckoned to the waiter and each one ordered his favorite antidote for
+a possible snake bite.
+
+"Did he return to the show?" asked the Stranger, after he had rendered
+himself immune.
+
+[Illustration: _Noah listens to the tale of a Johnstown flood
+survivor._]
+
+"He sure did; you couldn't keep him away, but he has never been fond of
+snakes since. It is the same man whom you saw putting the group of
+elephants through their paces to-night."
+
+It was growing late, and the Proprietor announced that he was going to
+show his wife a good husband and said good-night, but the Stranger
+waited for the story which he saw was trembling upon his companion's
+lips, and induced the sleepy waiter to bring a farewell dose of
+snake-bite antidote. The man was unknown to him by name, but his
+personality promised to be interesting, for his face spoke of good
+living, the red of his complexion was evidently not entirely due to
+exposure to the sun, and the little sacs under the eyes indicated that
+he was apt to be the last of a convivial party to suggest breaking up.
+
+He had listened to the Proprietor's stories with the same bored
+expression which Noah might wear in hearing the experiences of a
+survivor of the Johnstown flood, and he looked regretfully at the vacant
+chair, now that his turn had come.
+
+"Snakes!" he exclaimed with a contemptuous snort. "What does the boss
+know about 'em? I used to own the only snake that was worth having. Ever
+hear of 'Big Pete'?" The Stranger confessed his ignorance, and the
+other settled back in his chair and lighted a fresh cigar.
+
+"I'll tell you about him, then. You know that a snake is a queer
+proposition in a menagerie. They get sore mouths--canker the fakirs
+call it--and won't eat, and then, if you've got any investment in 'em
+you want to get it out mighty quick, for they are no orchids. I was
+pretty well on my uppers, after a bad season on the road, when a guy
+named Merritt came to me and said he could get a fine snake cheap, and
+he thought we might make some money out of him by showing him to the
+Rubes at the county fairs.
+
+"What I didn't know about snakes would have filled a book, but when I
+saw this one I knew it was a bargain. It was the blamedest biggest snake
+that ever gave a wriggle, and the only reason its owners had not made a
+fortune was because it was never properly advertised. I used to know
+just how much he weighed and how long he was, but my brain got so tired
+figuring up the money we made out of him that I've had no memory for
+figures since.
+
+"Well, as I said, I was pretty hard up, but I had this sparkler left for
+'fall money,' and when I saw that snake I pushed it over my uncle's
+counter." He pointed to a large yellow diamond in his scarf, and the
+Stranger tried to make a mental calculation of a pawnbroker's valuation
+of it.
+
+"Merritt managed to dig up some mazuma, and we chipped in fifty apiece
+and became the proud possessors of Big Pete. If I had been wise to the
+business I would have known there was something wrong to make him sell
+so cheap, but we more than got our money back out of him the first week,
+so we had no kick coming. The newspaper boys were good to us and gave us
+a lot of space, and we were playing on velvet and had Pete besides. It
+was such a cinch that Merritt, who looked after the snake while I did
+the spieling and sold tickets on the front, commenced to get worried for
+fear we should lose him.
+
+"'Jim,' says he to me one morning when business was a little dull, 'I
+believe there's something phony about the blame snake. He won't eat and
+I've tempted him with the best I could get. I guess I'll run down to the
+Bowery and get one of those snake sharps to come up and have a look at
+him; I believe his teeth need filling.'
+
+[Illustration: _"Just two little red dots on the back of his hand."_]
+
+"I knew he was stuck on a girl that was doing a turn in a music hall
+down that way, but business was dull, so I let him go without raising a
+holler. The next day he comes back with a jaw-carpenter who claimed he
+knew all about snakes and when he gets through looking at Pete's mouth
+we felt pretty blue.
+
+"'Canker!' says he. 'Your little snakelet may live a month.'
+
+"Well, that put it up to us to get busy, so I did the spieling on the
+outside until my voice gave out, and Merritt lied on the inside until he
+was black in the face, telling the Rubes about how many sheep old Pete
+swallowed every week. We had a lot of rabbits and doves with him in the
+cage, hopping and flying around behind the thick glass front, and they
+were real sociable with old Pete, who never batted an eye at 'em. At the
+end of the month he was looking pretty thin and we were afraid he would
+peg out any day. It was hard luck on us, for things were coming our way
+and our bank rolls were getting good and plenty thick and they were all
+'yellow boys,' from the case card to the wrapper. Our wads grew fatter
+as Pete grew thinner, and we were looking for some easy mark to unload
+him onto, when one morning Merritt comes running out, just as I was
+staving off a farmer who had heard him lie and brought around a flock of
+scabby sheep to sell to us for snake food.
+
+"'Jim,' he yells, grabbing me by the shoulders and waltzing around like
+a whirling dervish, 'we'll make Vanderbilt and Rockefeller look like
+thirty cents; old Pete has swallowed every blame pigeon and rabbit in
+the coop.'
+
+"It seemed too good to be true, but when I went to have a look there was
+not a feather nor a piece of fur to be seen and old Pete was examining
+all the corners of the cage to see that he hadn't overlooked a bit. He
+looked a whole lot better already, and Merritt and I began to discuss
+what we should do with all our money.
+
+"But say, there was one thing we forgot to reckon on--the appetite he
+had been saving for about a year, and although the money came in faster
+than ever, most of it went out to the rabbit men and pigeon fanciers.
+
+"You know that when a snake swallows an animal you can see the bulge in
+him for a long time, but you couldn't see any in old Pete. He was just
+the same size all the way from his nose to the tip of his tail, for
+there was no space between the animals.
+
+"Things began to look pretty serious for us, for we had used up all the
+available small live stock in the surrounding country, and the Rubes got
+onto the fact that we were up against their game and raised the ante on
+us for what was left. It's like taking candy from a child to sell a gold
+brick to a farmer, but he everlastingly gets back at you if you have to
+buy any of his produce. Hungry Joe and the man who invented the
+green-goods game would be skinned to death if they had to buy a dozen
+eggs from one of 'em.
+
+"And all the time old Pete kept a constant procession of small animals
+moving down his throat, regardless of expense, and if the supply ran
+short he would look at Merritt so reproachfully that it made him feel so
+bad he couldn't deliver his lecture for sobs. He worked the pathetic on
+him, but if I came around there was no 'Only three grains of corn,
+mother,' expression on his face; he would just rear up on his tail and
+lambaste that glass trying to get at me. I had been living pretty well
+during our prosperity and I guess I looked good to him, so rather than
+have any hard feelings about it I stuck closer than ever to the front of
+the house.
+
+"We had rented a frame building in a little town up on the Hudson and
+were showing him off in good form. Business was rushing and we had the
+S. R. O. sign out all the time, but snake food was getting scarcer than
+boiled lobsters during the cold snap last winter. The show had closed up
+for night and we were trying to make dents in the front of the tavern
+bar with our breast bones and laying in a stock of supplies, in case old
+Pete should bite us.
+
+"While we were discussing the best way to stimulate the rabbit-breeding
+industry, 'biff--boom--bang,' went the town bell and the barkeep
+commenced to peel off his coat and get into a red flannel shirt and a
+fireman's helmet. It was one of those towns where they have a dude
+volunteer fire department, which the boys all join for the socials in
+the winter and to look pretty on the annual parade day. Merritt and I
+didn't hurry any; we knew that it would take some time for the chief,
+who kept the town drug store, to get into his red shirt and shiny boots
+and select the bouquet to carry in the big end of his speaking trumpet.
+Pretty soon, 'Always Ready, Ever Faithful, Hose Company Number One,'
+which comprised the department, came down the street, all of the company
+shouting orders through trumpets at the two coons who were pulling the
+cart.
+
+"Of course, we went along to see the 'Fighting the Flames' show, but
+say: the joke was on us, for it was our theater which provided it. There
+wasn't anything left to burn and the hose company marched proudly back.
+Poor old Pete was nothing but a heap of ashes and Merritt looked
+sorrowful.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'let's copper the rabbit market before they get wise.'"
+
+"Did you have no insurance?" asked the Stranger sympathetically.
+
+"Not a blame cent," replied his companion as he rose to go to bed. "But
+I am making good money out of old Pete yet. I had him stuffed and get a
+hundred a week from a dime museum for him--and they furnish the feed."
+
+
+
+
+THE AMOROUS BABOON
+
+
+
+
+THE AMOROUS BABOON
+
+
+Thanks to the busy Press Agent, the fame of Jocko the Jealous, the
+amorous baboon, had preceded him to America, and when the animals from
+the Paris Hippodrome had been safely transferred to their dens in the
+Arena at Dreamland he was the center of attraction as he limbered up his
+muscles in the large monkey cage, after the cramped accommodations of
+the small traveling box. He had gained a reputation as a masher in
+Paris; but never had the menagerie attendants seen him so madly in love
+and so insanely jealous as upon his first introduction to American
+beauty, as exemplified by the fair woman who stood before his cage.
+
+Jocko was not the first male being who had been fascinated by the charms
+of the Prima Donna during her career; for she had been through the
+marriage ceremony so often that she could say it backwards, never
+forgetting to cross her fingers before saying, "Until death do us part."
+The Proprietor drew the Stranger's attention to the group before the
+cage, a mischievous smile on his face as he looked over the half dozen
+of callow youths who are always in the train of the Prima Donna.
+
+"Watch out for squalls over there," he said. "Jocko is affectionate now,
+but there will be something doing in a few minutes." The monkey was
+using all of the blandishments known to an amorous baboon and although
+the words of his soft chattering were unintelligible, their import could
+not be mistaken by a past mistress of the gentle art of love making; but
+the Prima Donna could not be beguiled into placing herself within reach
+of the hairy paws. Suddenly his mood changed, for one of her male
+companions placed his hand on her arm to attract her attention and
+Jocko, giving a howl of rage, danced madly up and down on all fours,
+showing a vicious set of fangs as his lips curled back in a hideous
+snarl. The bars of his cage were strong and so close together that he
+could not get out to attack his rival; but he gathered up a mass of
+litter from the floor and showered Prima Donna and callow youth alike.
+His screams echoed through the Arena and caused even the majestic lions
+and the haughty tigers to look in the direction of the cage of the
+despised "Bandar Log," and made the smaller animals uneasy. The woman
+who was described on the programme as "Miss ----, Famous Society Woman,"
+had torn herself away from her arduous social duties with the Four
+Hundred to exhibit a troupe of leopards to a Coney Island audience, her
+identity concealed by a small black mask, and her performance in the big
+cage was interrupted by the noise; so the Proprietor thought it time to
+interfere.
+
+[Illustration: _"He smoked his cigar in the lobby like any other
+guest."_]
+
+The Prima Donna laughed good-naturedly as he helped to brush the sawdust
+and litter from her dress and tactfully drew her away, and Jocko quieted
+down and implored her to return; but she was accustomed to gentler
+wooing, and refused to put her dainty gown again in jeopardy.
+
+"Jocko gave quite a performance to-night," said the Proprietor as he
+joined the Press Agent and the Stranger at the table, after the show.
+"That baboon is crazy about women; but he hasn't the discrimination of
+Consul, the most intelligent monkey that ever lived. You may remember
+that he was never quiet in his cage, but if a specially well-dressed
+woman stopped in front of it he played entirely to her and when she
+moved away his eyes followed her as long as she was in sight."
+
+"There will never be another like Consul," said the Press Agent, shaking
+his head sadly. "He made my job a sinecure, for he was good for a column
+any day and a full page on Sundays."
+
+"Never until the Missing Link is discovered," replied the Proprietor. "I
+don't believe a more human monkey will ever be found, and I attribute
+his wonderful intelligence to the fact that he associated entirely with
+human beings, almost from the day of his birth. I got him from the
+captain of a tramp steamer which traded to the West Coast, and I paid a
+goodish bit of money for him too. I have never dared to tell his early
+history as it was told to me, for fear I should be laughed at for a
+liar; but stranger things happen in the animal business than ever get
+into print, and if I dared risk my reputation by telling the things
+which actually occur in a menagerie, I should never need a Press Agent;
+but a plausible lie is accepted where a truth which sounds improbable is
+turned down."
+
+The Press Agent looked at him reproachfully, but agreed with the
+proposition.
+
+"Do you know, I have found that to be true when I have visited the
+newspaper offices," he said. "I have actually had to embroider some of
+the accounts of things which have happened here."
+
+"I suspected it, for I didn't recognize some of the stories when I saw
+them in print," answered the Proprietor, smiling at him approvingly. He
+consented to tell the history of Consul, the famous chimpanzee, when
+the Stranger expressed his entire credulity and the Press Agent assumed
+an encouraging and sympathetic attitude.
+
+[Illustration: _"Jocko, giving a howl of rage, danced madly up and
+down."_]
+
+"Of course, I have to take the ship captain's word for what happened
+before I bought him, but from the way the chimp developed and the
+intelligence he displayed after he came into my possession, I am
+prepared to believe it. He told me that he got him from the natives at
+the mouth of a small river on the West Coast, where he anchored his
+steamer to trade. They came off about the ship in their canoes, but he
+did not care for the rubber and ivory they had to offer and he was about
+to hoist anchor when one of them, who was in a small canoe with a woman,
+motioned to him to stop. The woman was crouched up in the stern, nursing
+what the captain thought was a baby, but when the man dragged it away
+from her, in spite of her voluble protest, he saw that it was a small
+chimpanzee. The man seemed desperately anxious to trade--and I imagine
+the captain's trade goods were not the sort to meet the entire approval
+of the missionaries--so that a bargain was concluded and the woman's
+grief allayed by a generous share of the purchase price. As nearly as he
+could make out, she had found the little thing in the jungle when it was
+only a few days old and had reared it in place of a baby which had just
+died. She was a low type of woman, even for an African savage, but the
+maternal instinct was strong enough to make her grieve for little
+Consul, as the captain christened him. The monkey grieved over the
+separation, too, but sailors make much of animals and he soon became
+reconciled to it.
+
+"Thousands of people saw him after I purchased him, and you can judge of
+the reputation he attained when I tell you that I was getting fifteen
+hundred dollars a week for him in Berlin when he died, and he was booked
+for the entire season at that price. People had seen him eat with a
+knife and fork, smoke a cigar, use a typewriter and do all of the stunts
+which simply aped humanity, but you had to live with the little beast to
+appreciate how intensely human he was. Everybody connected with the show
+loved him, and when I wanted to find any one of the employees who was
+off duty, or not in his proper place, I always went first to Consul's
+cage and I was pretty sure to locate him. That monkey was never still,
+and the things he would do and the pranks he would play off his own bat
+were more amusing than any of the things he had been taught.
+
+"When he was in company he was as well mannered as most men, but, of
+course, he had his prejudices and had to be watched. His special
+aversion was a negro, which is strange when you consider his early
+associations, and if one came around when he was loose he was apt to
+attack him. We had to consider that in traveling, for Consul always
+stopped at the hotels with his trainer and sat about the lobbies,
+smoking his cigar like any other guest, but if there were negro servants
+about, we had to be very careful not to let them come near him.
+
+"He had the reasoning power of a child of ten years old; he was patient
+when anything was wrong and we had to do disagreeable things to him,
+appreciating that it was for his benefit. Only once did we have to use
+force, when it was necessary to pull a tooth, and I am glad it wasn't
+oftener, for it took seven men to control him and they thought they had
+done a day's work when we finished. The last time he went abroad he was
+the life of the ship, but he pretty nearly killed himself. The doctor
+prescribed a cough medicine for him and Consul liked it so well that he
+got up in the night, after his trainer had gone to sleep, opened the
+valise in which it was kept and emptied the bottle. I guess there must
+have been laudanum in it, for they had to work over him the rest of the
+night to save him.
+
+[Illustration: _"All of his savage instincts were aroused."_]
+
+"He would walk the deck with the lady passengers, who made a great deal
+of him, and when the customary concert was given, nothing would do but
+that he must perform and then pass the plate for the collection. He was
+in evening dress and behaved like a perfect gentleman, and the
+collection was a large one. It was heaped on the plate, and he was just
+about to present it to the captain when Booker Washington stepped
+forward to make a contribution. The money for the Seaman's Home went
+flying to the four corners of the salon and the trainer had a difficult
+time in persuading Consul to retire without tearing the clothes off of
+the man whose only offense was his color. This was Consul's last voyage,
+for he contracted pleurisy and died in Berlin, and I felt worse over his
+death than I did over the burning of my whole menagerie in Baltimore a
+few years ago."
+
+"Have you found that early association with human beings makes the other
+animals easier to train?" asked the Stranger, and the Proprietor shook
+his head.
+
+"No; I would rather train one taken in the jungle than an animal born in
+captivity. They do raise the pumas in South America and have them about
+the houses as we do cats; but I wouldn't trust one of 'em. And as for
+the bigger cats, the lions and tigers, there is no such thing as taming
+them. They may be trained to do certain things, but they are never
+trustworthy. We had a queer illustration of that when I was traveling
+with a caravan circus in France. One of the lionesses had a litter of
+three cubs, and in the excitement of the moving and strange
+surroundings, she killed two of them. We took the other one away and the
+woman who cooked for us volunteered to raise it. She became very much
+attached to it and developed the theory that she could overcome its
+savage instincts by diet, and for a time it looked as if she were right.
+The beast was with her for about two years and grew to a fine animal,
+but she never let him taste raw food. One day, when he was comfortably
+lying before the stove, she pushed him with her foot to get him out of
+the way and he resented it. Whether it was that alone, or whether the
+odor of meat which she was about to cook appealed to him, I don't know;
+but all of his savage instincts were aroused and when we secured him we
+found that he had taken most of her scalp off."
+
+"It's funny how some people are always looking for a chance to get
+damages," said the Press Agent, settling himself comfortably in his
+chair. "We had a case of it when Merritt and I were running a dime
+museum out West. The freaks all lived together at a large boarding house
+and one morning, when they reported for duty, the 'Tattooed Lady' was
+missing. It was before the days when they were so common and we had
+spent a lot of money to have her decorated and made her our star
+attraction. Of course, none of the tattooing was visible when she was in
+street costume, but when she sat on the platform dressed in low neck and
+short skirts the lecturer had something to talk about, for the menagerie
+pictured on her was a thing of beauty, and the few choice texts like,
+'Be good and you will be happy,' which were scattered in between the
+animals, were highly moral and elevating, and that was one of the strong
+points of our show. Merritt used to spread himself when he was telling
+how she was shipwrecked on a desert island and held captive by the cruel
+cannibals, whose high priests spared her from the menu to tattoo her
+with the symbols of their heathenish worship. It gave him a great chance
+to come in strong on the moral part, when he explained about the texts
+and told how they were added after the cannibals had been converted to
+red flannel shirts, silk hats and a vegetable diet, by the missionaries,
+and I have seen ancient maiden ladies moved to tears by his recital. So
+when he had to give his lecture without her, he got mixed up and called
+attention to the marvelous growth of hair on the face of the 'Circassian
+Beauty,' thinking she was the 'Bearded Lady,' and nearly pulled the ears
+off of the 'Dog Faced Boy,' trying to explain that he was 'The Man With
+The Rubber Skin.' Of course, that made trouble among the freaks, who are
+a mighty touchy lot anyway, and I have noticed that trouble always comes
+in bunches in the show business, so I wasn't surprised when a husky guy
+that looked like a farmer came in with blood in his eye and asked for
+the manager. I looked around for Merritt, but he had gone around the
+corner to get something to drown his sorrow, so I slipped a piece of
+lead pipe under my coat and acknowledged the soft impeachment.
+
+[Illustration: _"A 'Tattooed Lady,' and she's all covered with
+picters."_]
+
+"'Look'ee here, wot kinder a skin game be youse fellers runnin' here?'
+says the guy, and I took a good grip on the lead pipe and tried to turn
+away wrath by a soft answer, and quoting from our advertisement that it
+was a highly moral and intellectual entertainment.
+
+"'Not by a dern sight, it ain't,' says he. 'It's a blasted man-trap to
+ketch the unwary, an' I'll have the law on ye an' make yer pay fer
+trifling with my young affections.' I have had some pretty tough things
+said to me in my day, but that was about the worst ever, and pretty
+nearly took my breath away, but he went right on.
+
+"'I deliver milk to that boardin' house down the street an' I see a
+likely lookin' gal there lately an' I wanted some one to help milk an'
+look after the house, so I asks her to marry me. She says she will, so
+we hitched up an' I never knew she was one o' yer dern freaks until it
+was too late. She says she's a "Tattooed Lady," an' she's all covered
+with picters.'
+
+"'Well, what's the matter with 'em?' says I. 'Aren't they good
+pictures?'
+
+"'Good enough,' says he, 'for them as likes 'em; but I don't hanker
+after no decorations o' that kind an', b'gosh, I'll make yer pay fer
+palmin' off a damaged article on me. She's all over snakes an' other
+beasts an' it makes me sick ter my stummick every time I thinks of 'em.'
+I tried to convince him that we were not responsible and that it was his
+wife's duty to have informed him.
+
+"'That's what I told her, dod gast her! But she says it's my own fault
+if I didn't know she was a "Tattooed Lady," because I never asked her,
+an' blamed if she isn't proud o' them picters, too.'"
+
+"How did you settle it--did he get damages?" asked the Stranger.
+
+"Damages!" exclaimed the Press Agent as he wiped the foam from his
+moustache. "Why, Merritt came in, and when he heard the guy's kick he
+lit right into him.
+
+"'Blame your skin!' he yelled. 'I've a good mind to have you arrested
+for stealing the pictures from my art gallery. I have a claim on 'em,
+for I paid for the liquor to keep a sailor drunk for six weeks while he
+was doing that job.' The Rube got onto the fact that she was valuable,
+so they adjourned to a saloon to talk it over."
+
+"With what result?" asked the Proprietor, as he rose from the table.
+
+"Well, Merritt got her back on the platform, the Rube sold his farm, and
+within six weeks he was wearing more yellow diamonds and throwing a
+bigger chest than the husband of a grand opera prima donna."
+
+
+
+
+FEEDING THE SERPENTS AND A GRAND TRANSFORMATION
+
+
+
+
+FEEDING THE SERPENTS AND A GRAND TRANSFORMATION
+
+
+The animals had received their evening meal when the Proprietor came
+from the Arena and joined the Stranger and the Press Agent at the table
+outside.
+
+"I can never understand the interest people take in seeing the
+carnivorous animals fed; it is no more than giving a bone to a dog," he
+said, as he took his seat. "And yet it is one of the best drawing
+features of the show, and the same people remain night after night to
+see the meat poked into the cages. If it were not for the prohibition of
+the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals I could give a
+feeding exhibition which would be novel and interesting, for
+comparatively few people have ever seen a snake eat.
+
+"It is because a snake will not eat unless it kills its own food," he
+continued in answer to a question from the Stranger. "Snakes are more
+particular feeders than any other animals, and they will not touch
+anything which is not alive when it is brought to them. This is the
+night for feeding them, and if you care to remain until the crowd has
+gone you can see how it is done. Long as I have been in the business, I
+learn something new every day, and I never saw a cobra fed artificially
+until last week, when Brandu, my Hindoo snake charmer, received one
+direct from India. It seems that they are cannibal snakes and live upon
+their own kind in India, but that would be too expensive a diet here,
+and he forces feed down its throat."
+
+The thousands of incandescent lights on the Dreamland tower went
+out--the signal that the barkers might cease from barking and the
+spielers spiel no more--until the morrow brought its fresh crowd of
+amusement seekers, and the Proprietor led the way into the Arena. Brandu
+and his two native assistants were carrying the boxes which contained
+the snakes into the big exhibition cage, and, when the three men
+joined them, the weirdness of the surroundings made a profound
+impression upon the Stranger. All of the lights in the Arena were
+extinguished, with the exception of the small cluster directly over
+their heads, and pairs of luminous spots from the great semicircle of
+cages at the outer edge of the building reminded him that the human
+beings in the cage were not the only interested spectators of the
+proceedings.
+
+[Illustration: _"A procession of sandwich men."_]
+
+The assistants carefully removed the great boas and pythons from the
+boxes, laying them on the floor, where they crawled lazily about, their
+delicate forked tongues vibrating like streaks of red flame, while
+Brandu removed a slat from a crate of rabbits and put a half-dozen of
+them on the floor. The little animals had no instinctive fear of the
+serpents, for they hopped about among them and over their wriggling
+bodies unconcernedly, but the snakes were hungry after a fast of two
+weeks and they wasted no time in getting to the business before them.
+The proceeding was the same in each case. A serpent would crawl up to
+the rabbit and place its nose, at which the little furry beast would
+sniff curiously, close to that of its prospective supper. The red forked
+tongue would pass rapidly over its face and the rabbit made no attempt
+to move. Whether it was the effect of some anaesthetic quality in the
+breath of the snake or the traditional charm of the serpent, it was hard
+to say, but the rabbit made no move to escape. Slowly but surely it
+yielded to the fascination of the snake, the large transparent ears
+dropped to the side of the head and the body muscles relaxed until the
+tickling of the serpent's tongue caused no reflex movement of the paws.
+
+The snake then carefully withdrew its head until the slim neck was in
+the form of a letter S, and when it again straightened out it was with
+the force of a released steel spring and the aim of the flat head was
+unerring. The stroke was so rapid that it was difficult for the eye to
+follow and the rabbit never knew what happened, for its body made a
+quick circle in the air and in less than a second all that was to be
+seen was one small paw protruding from the coiled body which had brought
+it a quick and merciful death. The jaws of the serpent have seized it by
+the snout and thrown it back into its coils and the first pressure kills
+it, although the ever tightening embrace continues until the bones are
+crushed within the unbroken skin, so that it can be easily swallowed.
+
+It is not swallowing in the ordinary sense of the word, for the snakes
+pull themselves over the rabbits as a glove is pulled over the finger,
+and the progress to the stomach can be watched through the length of the
+snake's neck. The snakes which were too small to manage a rabbit were
+fed on white rats and mice, but the process was the same in each case,
+except that the Hindoos held the rodents by their tails until the snakes
+had hypnotized them.
+
+"I suppose that this seems cruel to people because the rabbits are such
+harmless little beasts," said the Proprietor as the last bit of fur
+disappeared. "To my mind it is not half so cruel as hunting hares with
+guns and dogs, for death from the snake's blow is as quick and
+painless as that from a bullet, and there are no maimed and wounded
+animals to drag themselves away to lingering deaths in hiding. But now I
+will show you something which has never been known in this country."
+
+[Illustration: _"Brought the head of the cobra close to his face."_]
+
+One of the natives brought out a curiously woven circular basket which
+he handled with great care, and setting it in the middle of the cage
+retired to a respectful distance. Brandu crouched on the floor beside
+it, and, although the performance was not accompanied by the weird
+Oriental music which signaled the public appearances of the snake
+charmer, the tense expression of his face and the uncanniness of the
+surroundings made it sufficiently impressive, for he was about to handle
+the cobra de capello, the most venomous snake in all the great
+collection. He wasted no time in the pantomime and incantation of the
+ring performance, but quickly threw off the cover, and when the hooded
+head arose swaying above the edge of the basket, he started a low
+whistling and passed his slim brown hands with lightning rapidity above
+it. He was absolutely fearless, but the task before him demanded the
+concentration of all his thoughts and he seemed unconscious of the
+startling interruption of a fight between two of the lions, and the
+shouts and pistol-shots of the keepers who separated them.
+
+He never removed his gaze from the head of the serpent and his hands
+moved so rapidly that they were almost invisible until, quicker than a
+snake could strike, one of them darted down and caught the slim neck
+behind the distended hood. He gave a sharp exclamation of triumph and
+sprang to his feet, the cobra coiling its body about his bare brown arm
+and giving every indication of rage.
+
+"I am always glad when that part of the performance is over," said the
+Proprietor with a sigh of relief. "Of course, it is all in the day's
+work with Brandu and he has done it thousands of times, but some day he
+will be a fraction of a second too slow and then--well, I shall have to
+get another snake charmer. Watch him now and you will see something
+which only the men of his caste can do."
+
+Brandu's white teeth glistened as he smiled at the Proprietor and
+pointed first to his own eyes and then to those of the serpent. He
+brought the head of the cobra close to his face, his expression became
+fixed and stern and the pupils of his widely opened eyes, which had been
+dilated until the iris was but a narrow rim, contracted to the size of
+pin heads. The cobra gazed at him fixedly and the tense body slowly
+uncoiled from his arm and hung limp and motionless, and Brandu laid it
+on the floor as lifeless and inert as a piece of rope. One of his
+assistants handed him a glass containing a couple of raw eggs and,
+handling it as carelessly as if it were a harmless garter snake, he
+picked up the cobra and forced a tube of polished bamboo between its
+jaws. When he had poured the eggs through the tube he withdrew it and
+carefully replaced the snake in the basket, still apparently lifeless;
+but bending over he blew sharply into its face and the cobra was
+instantly reanimated into five feet of viciousness. Its head reared up
+above the edge, the spectacled hood distended in anger, but Brandu
+quickly clapped on the cover and the snake feeding was finished for two
+weeks.
+
+[Illustration: _"You're a blame fine figure of a fat man."_]
+
+"That is a great performance of Brandu's," said the Press Agent, "but it
+profits us nothing because the best part of it cannot be shown to the
+public. I never see a snake fed without thinking of something which
+happened when I was running a side show with the Greatest Show on Earth.
+
+"You know that the dime museum business was run to death while the craze
+lasted in this country, and freaks got so common that you couldn't throw
+a stone in the streets of any large city without hitting one of 'em.
+When the fickle public tired of giving up its dimes to see 'em, a guy
+named Merritt and myself had a choice collection on hand, and we went on
+the road with the big show for the summer, thinking perhaps our business
+would pick up in the fall. Our two great attractions were the biggest
+boa-constrictor in captivity, which we called 'Jointless Jake,' and the
+heaviest fat man in the world. That snake was about two hundred feet
+long, and while the fat man wasn't much on length, he held the record
+for belt measurement. Nine hundred and twenty-seven pounds he weighed,
+as we demonstrated on our own scales at every performance. Their feed
+bill was quite an item, as the snake took a half-dozen sheep every two
+weeks and the fat man, who was billed as 'Signor Adipose
+Avoirdupois'--Merritt invented that--needed about a side of beef every
+day.
+
+"Freaks are a jealous lot and as hard to manage as rival prima donnas,
+and these two monstrosities came to hate each other like poison. They
+were in different lines, but you may have noticed that the side show
+'professor' uses up most of the superlatives in the English language
+when he gives his lecture, and each of 'em seemed afraid that the other
+would get some of his share of the dictionary. Adipose used to look at
+Jake's coiled body as if he would like to sit on it and flatten it out,
+and the snake would return the glance with a naughty little twinkle in
+its eye, as if he was estimating how much it would have to stretch its
+skin to accommodate A. A. in its interior, until it made Merritt anxious
+about 'em.
+
+"'That blame fat fool will waste away and spoil his shape, if he don't
+stop worrying,' he says, and he cuts a lot of his talk out of the
+description of the snake and uses the words on Adipose. Maybe you think
+snakes are stupid, but they aren't, and the boa got the hump and refused
+to uncoil himself to show his length unless he got his full share of the
+spiel. It cheered Avoirdupois up, though, and when we moved to the next
+town he stood around to gloat over Jake when he was being moved from the
+traveling box to the exhibition cage. The snake hadn't been fed for ten
+days and he was good and lively as well as being out of temper, so when
+he caught sight of the Signor he scattered the boys with one flip of his
+tail and went for him.
+
+"I've heard of bear hugs, but I never saw such a squeezing as that boa
+gave poor Adipose. It was a long way around him, but the snake made
+about a dozen wraps and all we could see of the fat man was a pair of
+feet sticking out at one end of the coil and his face, which looked like
+a purple harvest moon, projecting from the other. Jake reaches out and
+gets hold of a tent peg with his tail, which gives him a purchase, and
+then he tightens up for fair and Adipose lets out a holler you could
+hear a mile.
+
+"Of course, we got busy with crowbars and jackscrews and tried to pry
+Jake off, but there was nothing doing and the harder we pried the closer
+he cinched up on Adipose. Merritt usually had a suggestion to make, so I
+looked at him and he was lost in thought, but in a minute he brightens
+up and calls for a rope.
+
+"'We can't pry the blame snake away from the man,' says he, as he tied
+the rope around the Signor's feet, 'so we'll try to pull the man away
+from the snake.' All hands fell to and pulled to beat four of a kind,
+but Jake just tightened up a bit and grinned and Adipose let out
+another holler.
+
+"'You need a traction engine on that rope,' says I when they gave it up
+as a bad job, and Merritt, who was looking a little discouraged, gave a
+whoop.
+
+"'Bring an elephant,' he yelled, and when one of the boys started off on
+a run for the menagerie, he called after him to 'make that order two
+elephants.' The Hathis came lumbering over, and Merritt tied the rope
+around the shoulders of one and put another rope around Jake's neck and
+the shoulders of the other elephant.
+
+"'Now pull, blame you!' says he, heading 'em in different directions and
+giving one of 'em a kick, and they put their shoulders against the
+ropes. It was a mighty interesting performance to every one but Adipose,
+who didn't seem to enjoy it at all, judging from the yells he let out.
+Jake was having the time of his life, and the harder the elephants
+pulled the tighter he squeezed the Signor, and when he felt that they
+were getting the better of him he made a supreme effort which kinked up
+every muscle in his body. But there was no holding on against those
+brutes, and pretty soon the fat man commenced to slip out from the
+coils, feet first. It was a queer thing to watch and his legs stretched
+so that I thought his knees would never come into sight. His legs had
+been about the size of barrels when the snake grabbed him, but between
+the stretching and the squeezing they were now three times as long and
+about as large as broomsticks. He weighed as much as ever when the
+elephants finally got him out, but the flesh was distributed differently
+and instead of being six feet tall and twelve feet around, he was twelve
+feet long and built in proportion. The snake was up against it, too, for
+he had cramped himself so with that last squeeze that he couldn't
+straighten out the kinks, and he kept in the same shape as when he was
+wrapped around the Signor. We tried to straighten him out, but it was no
+use; he just stayed coiled up like a spring and the boys rolled him
+around as if he were a barrel.
+
+"Merritt had kept cheerful as long as there was anything to be done, but
+tears came to his eyes when he looked at Adipose. The Signor was
+standing up, gazing at his feet, which he hadn't seen before in twenty
+years, and Merritt looked up at him and freed his mind.
+
+"'You're a blame fine figure of a fat man, aren't you, now?' says he.
+'Just on account of your confounded professional jealousy we lose our
+two star attractions, for that blamed snake is so kinked up that he
+isn't good for anything except to cut up into barrel hoops.'
+
+"The Signor was ashamed of himself and hadn't a word to say, so he just
+kept quiet and tried to get used to his new shape and taking a
+bird's-eye view of things. Merritt and I were feeling pretty blue when
+along comes Tody Hamilton, the circus press agent, and as soon as he saw
+what had happened he made a run for a trolley car.
+
+"'Don't let 'em get away!' he yelled back over his shoulder. 'This is
+the biggest scoop on record and I'm off for the printing-office.'
+
+[Illustration: _"Jake was having the time of his life, and the harder
+the elephants pulled the tighter he squeezed the Signor."_]
+
+"'It'll make a good newspaper story, all right; but where do we come in
+on it?' says Merritt, looking mournfully at Adipose.
+
+"Well, a couple of hours later I had to go into the city to order some
+new togs for the Signor, who looked as if he were dressed in a
+particularly baggy bathing suit since he had been stretched out, and the
+first thing I saw was a procession of sandwich men marching down the
+street. The ink wasn't dry on the posters, but Tody had been busy, and
+there in flaming red letters was the announcement--
+
+      JUST ARRIVED AT THE
+           BIG SHOW!
+
+   DON'T MISS SEEING THEM!!!
+
+   LENGTHY LOUIS, THE TALLEST
+     MAN IN THE UNIVERSE!!!
+
+ CIRCULAR SAM, THE MOST GIGANTIC
+   HOOP SNAKE EVER CAPTURED!!!
+
+
+
+
+THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE AND THE INCONSIDERATE PYTHON
+
+
+
+
+THE LIONESS SKIRT DANCE AND THE INCONSIDERATE PYTHON
+
+
+The conventional skirt dance has long ceased to be a novelty on the
+vaudeville stage, but as it is performed by "La Belle Selica" in the
+Arena at Dreamland it holds the interest of that most exacting
+audience--a crowd of Coney Island pleasure seekers. It is not because
+Selica is pre-eminent among dancers, but on account of the unusual and
+dangerous stage setting; for she performs in the large exhibition cage,
+surrounded by a half dozen lionesses, each animal seated on a separate
+pedestal. Any one of the huge beasts could crush the dancer with a
+single blow of a massive paw, and the great jaws which snap viciously at
+her tiny feet as she kicks them before their faces are sufficiently
+powerful to crush the shin-bone of an ox.
+
+She is apparently without fear of them, for she dances gracefully from
+one to the other, flicking them across their faces with the light switch
+which she carries for her only protection, and kicking over their heads
+and into their very mouths, always missing the answering snap of the
+jaws by the fraction of an inch, and acknowledging it with a smile as
+she whirls away to repeat the performance before another pedestal. The
+lionesses see the performance many times in the course of a season, but
+they never lose interest in it and they do not remove their eyes from
+Selica from the time she enters the cage until she drives them out
+before her. So long as she is on her feet and agile enough to escape the
+swift stroke of a paw or the snapping jaws, she is safe; for a lioness
+would not jump at her from a pedestal; but there is always the chance of
+a slip or a false step and then----!!!
+
+It happened once, and caused a suspension of Selica's performance for
+two months during the Pan-American Exposition at Buffalo, for Grace, the
+largest lioness, was on her before she could recover herself; and it
+required the efforts of Bostock and all of his trainers to beat back the
+beasts who were maddened by the sight and smell of blood and to rescue
+the unconscious woman from the cage. They have never forgotten that
+moment of rebellion which was so nearly successful, and they are ever
+watchful for another opportunity to avenge the many cuts of the
+training whip which they received in the course of their schooling. But
+Selica is also watchful, and although Grace had latterly done nothing
+particularly out of the way, the wonderful sixth sense which experienced
+trainers always acquire warned her that the animal should be regarded
+with suspicion. The beast had become nervous; a little more sullen than
+usual when ordered to leave her den for the exhibition cage, and a
+trifle slow and rebellious when told to jump up on her allotted
+pedestal.
+
+[Illustration: _"Now, if you'll kindly give me your attention."_]
+
+Constant association with the wild animals begets carelessness but
+Selica, with the scars of Grace's sharp claws still visible on her back
+and shoulders, was quick to notice the change and especially careful,
+before opening the door from the den to the runway, to look through the
+observation hole and make sure that the lioness was not crouched for a
+spring. Grace had been particularly sullen in the afternoon and she was
+growling ominously when Selica went to get her for the evening
+performance, but when the woman saw the three little furry balls which
+were huddled in a corner of the den she understood and forgave all. The
+cubs were no larger than St. Bernard puppies, but Grace apparently
+considered them worth fighting for; and Selica's dance was given that
+night with only five lionesses in the cage, and the Proprietor told the
+Stranger the reason for the empty pedestal.
+
+"Wait until after the performance and I will take them out of the cage
+and show them to you," he said; and the Stranger, remembering a
+tradition to the effect that robbing a lioness of her cubs is a
+dangerous feat, looked forward with a great deal of interest to the
+after-piece.
+
+"We can't trust the rearing of the cubs to Grace," said the Proprietor,
+as he stood in front of her cage after the audience had been dismissed.
+"The close proximity of the other animals in the Arena and the curiosity
+of the thousands of people who come here every day would make her so
+crazy that she would destroy them, so I must get them a foster mother. I
+have sent to New York for a bitch with pups, and in a couple of days I
+will show you a happy family." The cubs were in the center of the cage
+and Grace stood over them, snarling and looking with blazing eyes at the
+group in front of it; but Selica's voice from the runway and a rattling
+of the door at the back distracted her attention, and as she sprang at
+the door the Proprietor darted a hand between the bars and seized one of
+the cubs, drawing it safely out a half second before the enraged mother
+landed against the bars with a force which made them rattle.
+
+The poor beast was almost frantic, but the same maneuver was twice
+repeated, and in spite of her fierce attacks on doors and bars the
+Proprietor, who had acquired through his lifetime association with the
+great cats as much of their quickness of movement as it is given to mere
+man to learn, removed the three cubs without receiving a scratch.
+
+Poor helpless little creatures they were, and it was difficult to
+realize that they would soon grow into beasts as powerful as the
+ferocious Baltimore, the terror of trainers, who was answering Grace's
+lamentations with roars which fairly shook the building, from his cage
+on the other side of the Arena.
+
+[Illustration: _"Looked like the pennant of a man-o'-war."_]
+
+"That animal was bred in captivity, born and raised in our menagerie in
+England," said the Proprietor after he had placed the cubs in charge of
+one of the keepers. "I suppose that's what makes him such a bad beggar
+to handle. Give me the jungle-bred lion to train, every time, for after
+the manhandling and discomfort of his capture and transportation to the
+coast by the natives, he appreciates the care and humanity of a
+civilized trainer. These cubs which are raised in captivity are always
+played with and teased by the employees and visitors, and their first
+knowledge of their strength comes to them accidentally when they hurt a
+man without meaning to do it; but they soon learn to connect cause and
+effect, and then it is time to watch out for 'em. A jungle-bred lion is
+pretty much cock o' the walk until he is snared or trapped, and in his
+first experience with men he is vanquished and realizes how useless is
+his great strength against the nets and ropes which entangle him. The
+cub born in captivity is familiar with men from the first, and plays
+with them like a kitten until one day he is out of sorts or is
+accidentally hurt in a frolic and the swift cut of his razor-like claws
+makes his playmate or tormentor drop him and leave him in peace. That
+makes it hard for the trainer when he takes him in hand, for although
+the cub may be subdued, he remembers that he was once victorious and
+watches his chance. Jack Bonavita, the greatest trainer who ever went
+into a lion's cage, would have two good arms to-day if Baltimore had
+been born in the Nubian desert instead of in Manchester."
+
+They stood in front of Baltimore's cage for a moment, admiring the
+swelling muscles of the great beast as he sprang from side to side,
+shaking his shaggy mane and roaring defiance at the world, and then
+turned to go to the white-topped table in front of the Arena. In the
+doorway they met the Press Agent, looking anything but cheerful and
+muttering maledictions on the heads of all city editors. The Proprietor
+told him of the new arrivals in the Arena, and suggested sending the
+announcement of the birth to the papers.
+
+"A fat chance I'd stand of having it printed," he grumbled. "Here I've
+worked half the season and never given 'em a story that wasn't pretty
+nearly true, and to-day when I take them that account of Morelli and the
+jaguar they turn me down and holler 'fake.' Let me take one of those
+cubs and stripe it over with a little black paint, and to-morrow morning
+every newspaper in New York will have a photographer down here to take
+pictures of 'the only hybrid lion-tiger cub ever born,' and all of the
+space jerkers will be buttonholing me for a three column, front page
+story."
+
+The arrival of the waiter with soothing beverages soon brought back the
+customary smile to his genial face and the Proprietor's suggestion that
+perhaps he had embroidered some of the stories just a trifle, aroused
+only a good-natured protest.
+
+"The worst thing about the press agent's profession is that he has to
+risk his eternal salvation by making up plausible lies to satisfy the
+newspapers when he could give 'em better stories which are actually true
+if they would take 'em on his say so," he said, as he wiped the froth
+from his mustache. "I remember once when a guy named Merritt and
+myself were running a snake show in New York that we couldn't pay the
+rent because the papers wouldn't give us any publicity, although we had
+the finest collection of wrigglers that was ever gotten together. We
+were running it on the dead level, nary a fake about it, and Merritt's
+lecture was highly instructive and interesting and more than half true;
+but we saw that we couldn't win out at the game unless we crooked it. We
+were running so far behind that the only thing which saved us from a
+dispossess was the fact that they couldn't get a constable who would
+carry the snakes out to the sidewalk; but Merritt was a resourceful cuss
+and I felt confident that he would figure out some scheme to win out.
+
+[Illustration: _"Kicking over their heads and into their very mouths."_]
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'it's necessary for us to give 'em a sensation. We've
+tried to run this game as a purely moral and instructive entertainment,
+but we need the money and I reckon we've got to spring a cold deck on
+'em. I guess you've got to stand for being attacked by an untamable,
+man-eating python.'
+
+"'You can count me out on that,' says I. 'Every paper in the city would
+write me up as a victim of the demon Rum.' Merritt looked discouraged
+for a minute, but his face suddenly lighted up and I knew he had found a
+way.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'if we only take half of our usual allowance of
+fire-water to-night we will have enough cash to buy some paint. Now
+there's that big white python; the only specimen ever captured, the
+"pythonatus fluidum lactalis giganticus,"' says he. That was one trouble
+with Merritt; he'd get so stuck on the language which he manufactured
+that he couldn't leave it out, even in our business consultations, and
+it used up a lot of time. 'That python is the straight goods,' says he,
+'but he doesn't catch their eyes, so I'll paint the blame snake red,
+white and blue and christen him the "anacondus flagelum americanibus e
+pluribus unum," and give the reporters something to work on,' says he.
+'That'll work up the snakologists and set 'em writing in the papers to
+prove that there isn't any such thing; but we've got the answer to
+that, for we can show 'em one at twenty-five cents per.'
+
+"I never could stand for flim-flamming the generous public, but my meal
+ticket was punched so full of holes that it looked like a porous
+plaster, and I consented. Merritt spent most of the night decorating
+that python, and in the morning it looked like the pennant of a
+man-o'-war. I had to sit up and watch him, for he had the artistic
+temperament, and he was so carried away by his enthusiasm that if I
+hadn't restrained him he would have put on the coat-of-arms of the
+United States, eagle, motto and all.
+
+"'Now,' says he, when he had finished and stepped back to admire his
+work, 'if that blame snake's own mother would know him if she met him on
+the street, I'm a Dutchman. If this don't make 'em sit up and take
+notice, then I'll go to night school to learn the show business.'"
+
+"How did the scheme work?" asked the Proprietor, as the Press Agent
+paused to make the grand hailing sign of distress to the waiter.
+
+"Work!" he answered. "How does a fake always work in New York? Why, P.
+T. Barnum had the mold for his petrified man made from the legs of one
+man and the body of another, and he didn't even take the trouble to
+smooth off the ridges where the edges met when he cast it in Portland
+cement. But that didn't prevent all of the scientific sharps who
+inspected it from certifying to its genuineness. His mermaid was
+manufactured from a codfish skin and a stuffed monkey; but the public
+stood for that, too, and he made a fortune out of 'em. Maybe you can't
+fool all of the people all of the time, but you can fool most of 'em
+most of the time; especially if they live in little old New York. Of
+course, we didn't pull off such a success as Barnum did; but we had no
+kick coming when we counted up the receipts for the next week. Merritt's
+lecture was a work of art and he manufactured language at a rate which
+would have given Noah Webster nervous prostration when he christened the
+python 'Old Glory,' and told about its combining the venomous qualities
+of the cobra and the strength of the boa-constrictor. The python was so
+stuck on its new colors that it nearly broke its neck turning around to
+admire itself and everything went lovely. Of course, there was the usual
+howl from the snakologists who knew it all, and 'Old Subscriber,'
+'Citizen,' 'Pro Bono Publico' and the rest of the bunch wrote columns to
+the newspapers, denouncing us as frauds.
+
+[Illustration: _Grace snarled over the cubs._]
+
+"You know how those things work; everybody puts up an argument and then
+it's up to the fellow who is making the bluff to back it up with an
+offer to donate a sum of money to some charitable institution if he
+can't deliver the goods. We were well ahead of the game as a result of
+the advertising and had about two thousand to the good and Merritt got
+awful chesty. He had lied about that snake so much that he believed in
+it himself and it made me a little nervous one night when he offered to
+donate two thousand dollars to the 'Home for Decrepit Side Show Fakirs'
+if any one could produce another specimen like this one, short of the
+head waters of the Amazon. I wasn't scared so much by that as by what I
+feared he might say, for I knew they couldn't get another if they raked
+the universe with a fine-tooth comb, and sure enough, he was carried
+away by his enthusiasm and offered to bet our entire bank roll that the
+snake was a genuine 'American flag', such as had never been exhibited in
+any country.
+
+"It was just our luck that there was a half-loaded tin-horn gambler in
+the audience that night; one of the kind that wears a yellow diamond and
+a checked suit with a white stove-pipe hat; and the only part of the
+speech that he understood was that somebody wanted to make a bet. That
+raised his sporting blood, and he climbed up to the platform and pulled
+out a roll of yellow boys that would choke a dog and peeled off twenty
+centuries.
+
+"'I don't know much about snakes which bromide won't make chase
+themselves back to the woods,' says he as he plunked 'em down on the
+table. 'I ain't got your gift of gab, but money talks and I've got this
+pile to say that you can't tell the truth to save your neck. Just stack
+up your pile alongside of that and then trot out your snakelet.' I was
+feeling pretty sore on Merritt for making such a bluff, but, of course,
+we had to make good and between us we covered the bet. We had glass
+cages full of snakes all around the platform, but 'Old Glory' was in a
+big chest covered with gilt figures and brass chains and fastened with a
+padlock. Merritt was mad clear through at having his veracity
+questioned, but he looked pretty confident as he stuck the key in the
+lock.
+
+"'It's a shame to take the money,' says he, as he eyed the gambler, 'but
+there's an old saying about the mental capacity of a man that is
+speedily separated from his bank roll, and I reckon you were away from
+home the last time the fool killer called.' The gam just smiled and kept
+his eye on the stakes, and Merritt gives the chains a rattle to wake up
+'Old Glory' and throws back the lid of the chest.
+
+"'Now,' says he, turning to the audience, 'if you'll kindly give me your
+attention I'll show you one of the most marvelous mysteries of Nature.
+It was procured by one of our special agents at the head waters of the
+Amazon at tremendous expense. It is a unique representative of the
+reptilian family and the sight of it should arouse pride in the hearts
+of all patriotic Americans; for as he unwinds his sinuous coils you will
+observe that while his head and neck are blue, the body, down to the
+tip of the tail, is marked with thirteen alternate stripes of red and
+white, giving this marvelous creature the appearance of being wrapped in
+that glorious emblem of liberty which waves over the land of the brave
+and the home of the free.' Merritt stops then, throwing out his chest
+and sticking his hand into the bosom of his coat to wait for the
+customary applause from the gallery to subside; but instead of the usual
+glad hands he was greeted with a roar of laughter and cat-calls and when
+he turned to look at the snake box, there was 'Old Glory' crawling out,
+looking ashamed of himself, for he was as white as the day he was born."
+
+"What happened?" asked the Proprietor as the Press Agent sighed.
+
+"Well, Merritt always had presence of mind, and as the sport gathered up
+our hard earned shekels he grabbed me by the arm and hurried me from the
+building. He knew that a Bowery audience was apt to follow cat-calls
+with antique eggs and vegetables of last season's vintage, and five
+minutes later we were trying to drown our sorrow.
+
+"'Jim,' says Merritt, 'I made a big mistake, for I should have tattooed
+him. His beauty was only skin deep and the blame snake shed his
+skin.'"
+
+
+
+
+THE ANIMAL BAROMETER AND THE ETERNAL FEMININE
+
+
+
+
+THE ANIMAL BAROMETER AND THE ETERNAL FEMININE
+
+
+Uncle Sam spends a large amount of money to forecast the weather
+twenty-four hours in advance, and the farmers and seafaring folk watch
+the bulletins no more eagerly than do the owners of the many shows whose
+harvest time is the brief summer season at Coney Island. Bad weather,
+especially if it comes on the first or last day of the week or a legal
+holiday, means a loss of hundreds of dollars to them, for if the skies
+are threatening, the holiday makers seek their pleasures nearer home and
+there are fewer people to give up their dimes and quarters under the
+seductive wheedling of the "barkers." Most of the show people look
+anxiously at the sky before retiring for the night, but there is one of
+them who finds an absolutely reliable forecast within the walls of his
+own building. Perhaps the signs and portents could not be translated by
+the weather clerk, but the Proprietor of the trained animal exhibition
+at Dreamland has been all of his life the companion of his charges, and
+has learned to recognize the meaning of unusual behavior or the shade of
+change in their voices which indicates an approaching storm.
+
+There was not a cloud to be seen, and every star in the heavens was
+trying to rival the brilliant electric lights on the great tower as he
+sat at the cafe table in front of the Arena with the Stranger and the
+Press Agent after the night's performance was over, but he gave an
+exclamation of disappointment as a half-smothered roar came from the
+throat of one of the lions in the building.
+
+"Rain to-morrow!" he said as the grumbling roar spread from cage to cage
+about the great semicircle. His companions smiled incredulously as they
+looked at the cloudless sky, but he repeated his prediction when the
+Stranger read "Fair and warmer to-morrow" from one of the evening
+papers. "I know all about the 'high and low pressure areas,'" he said,
+as he glanced at the chart. "A man in the show business has to study
+everything which may influence the attendance, but the behavior of my
+animals is a better barometer for local conditions than any aneroid
+which the Weather Bureau owns. In spite of the clear sky and the
+official predictions, I would wager that we shall have a bad storm
+within the next twenty-four hours, for those lions have the inherited
+knowledge of hundreds of generations of jungle-bred ancestors whose food
+supply depended largely upon the weather conditions."
+
+"Do the other animals possess the same barometric accomplishments?"
+asked the Stranger skeptically, and the Proprietor laughed as he invited
+him to come inside and judge for himself. The Arena was always an
+uncanny place at night, for in the dim light only the glowing eyes of
+the animals could be distinguished in the cages, and the snarls and
+growls which came from behind the gratings conjured up visions of what
+might happen if one of the animals were loose and crouching on the seats
+of the auditorium or in the galleries, waiting for a meal of human
+flesh; but to-night it was worse than usual, for the unwonted
+restlessness of the animals was apparent even to the untrained senses of
+the Stranger.
+
+The carnivora in captivity retain the habits of their relatives of the
+jungle and are more alert at night than in the daytime, but following a
+hard day's work in the exhibition cage they usually settle down for a
+few hours of sleep after receiving their evening allowance of meat.
+Although it was long past their resting time, not an eye was closed, and
+hundreds of pairs of bright spots were visible in the darkness as the
+beasts paced uneasily from end to end of their narrow dens. The
+elephants, whose arduous duties in the ring and on the ballyhoo brought
+such leg weariness that they were usually glad to be shackled for the
+night, were swaying their huge bodies from side to side and straining at
+the stout chains which fastened them and the shrill trumpeting of Tom,
+the largest one, was echoed and repeated by his companions, Roger and
+Alice. The roaring of the lions and the snarling of the tigers was
+mocked by the hideous laugh of the hyenas, and the discord of the
+strange noises was so disagreeable that the Stranger was relieved when
+they left the Arena and returned to the comparative quiet of the
+white-topped table.
+
+[Illustration: _"Every one of the great beasts jumped for her."_]
+
+"It will be a severe storm," said the Proprietor as the waiter took
+their orders. "Any impending change makes them uneasy, but when every
+animal in the menagerie is in the state of excitement which you noticed
+to-night you can be assured that it means a very decided disturbance. It
+is a thing which animal trainers are ever watchful about, for most of
+the training is done at night, and it is not safe to work with them when
+they are in that frame of mind."
+
+"But you give your advertised performances just the same," said the
+Press Agent.
+
+"That's a different matter," answered the Proprietor. "When the Arena is
+lighted up and filled with people, the attention of the animals is
+distracted and they forget their nervousness, but a rehearsal at night
+is a lonesome proceeding, at best, and as the trainer devotes his
+attention to a single animal at a time it leaves the others free to
+think up mischief or to give way to their unreasoning fear. I had that
+borne in upon me in a way I shall never forget a few years ago when I
+was a younger hand at the business. I knew a good deal about handling
+animals, but not as much about managing men as I have learned since, and
+I used to forget that giving an order was not the same thing as seeing
+that it was executed. There was a trainer named Barton in my employ who
+did a pretty fair act with a group of six lions, but he was a brutal
+sort of a chap and punished his animals so severely that they went
+through their performance on the jump so as to get out of the exhibition
+cage, where blows were more plentiful than kind words. His act was a
+winner, all right, for he was absolutely fearless and the animals put up
+a bluff of snarling and snapping which made it exciting, but I disliked
+the man so much that I was glad to farm him out for a ten weeks'
+engagement on the vaudeville circuit.
+
+"He wasn't a bad-looking chap and when he came back from his tour he
+brought with him one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. She
+was an Egyptian who had been brought to this country with a troupe of
+dancers for one of the big exhibitions, and he met her and married her
+when they were performing in the same theater. Of course, I had
+absolutely no use for an Egyptian dancer with my show and I made the
+marriage an excuse to get rid of Barton; but he begged me to keep him on
+the plea that he was teaching her to do his act with the lions. She was
+so beautiful that I realized that she would be a great drawing card if
+she developed into a good trainer, so I consented and signed a contract
+with him for another year. I regretted it when I saw the first
+rehearsal, for it was painfully evident that she went into the cage only
+because she was more afraid of her husband than she was of the lions,
+and I didn't blame her; for while I might interfere to prevent
+ill-treatment of the lions, which were my property, I had no authority
+to protect her from his cruelty. They did most of the rehearsing at
+night, and I trusted to the fear which Barton had instilled in the lions
+to keep them from attacking her, for he always stood at the bars and
+they would cower down at the sound of his voice. You know it is never
+safe for two people to be in the cage with a group of animals at the
+same time unless they stand back to back and keep in one place, for if
+they are moving about an animal may run into one while endeavoring to
+escape from the other, and even the blow from a lion's tail might knock
+a man from his feet and then there would be trouble.
+
+[Illustration: _"Jim," says Merritt, ... "there is a great advantage in
+having a squaw for the top part of that there fish."_]
+
+"Poor little Leotta used to go into the cage and try to keep the
+tell-tale tremble out of her voice when she gave her commands, but she
+could never learn to concentrate her whole attention on the animals and
+give up looking for a sign of approval from Barton out of the corner of
+her eye. I made it a point to see that there was always plenty of
+assistance near in case of accidents, and gave Barton strict orders to
+keep her out of the cage when the animals were under the influence of
+'weather fear.' It was difficult for me to instruct or warn Leotta, for
+she understood English very little; but I helped her all I could, and
+gave her husband to understand that I would not allow any ill-treatment.
+
+"In spite of all my precautions, I was always uneasy when she was in the
+cage, and when I had to be away from the show she was constantly in my
+mind. I had to go to the wharf one afternoon to superintend the
+unloading of a new lot of animals which had been sent from our English
+quarters, and owing to delays at the custom house it was late at night
+before I could start back for the show. Perhaps I had absorbed some of
+the weather wisdom of the animals from long association with them, but,
+at any rate, I was uneasy at the delays and as I whizzed along in the
+trolley I congratulated myself on my foresight in having warned Barton,
+as the thunder heads were gathering and I knew the animals would have
+the jumps and be unsafe to work with. But my heart sank as I drew near
+the building and saw that it was brilliantly lighted up, for that could
+only mean one thing at that time of night--Leotta must be rehearsing.
+The trainers usually have but one small cluster of lights, but I had
+ordered the electrician to turn on all the switches when she was in the
+cage, as I thought she would be less frightened and the animals more
+tractable in the full light.
+
+"My guess was right: Barton, in disobedience of orders, had made her go
+into the cage, and he had taken advantage of my absence to break our
+iron-clad rule which forbids a trainer to drink. I saw the whole
+situation as soon as I entered the building, and I would have given the
+whole show to have the little woman safely on the right side of the
+bars. The animals in the dens were raising a worse row than they did
+to-night, and the lions in Leotta's group had forgotten their fear of
+the trainer in their greater fear of the approaching storm. They were
+ugly, and Barton, who was more than half-seas over, stood at the bars
+shouting abuse at his wife and the lions and jeering at her evident
+terror. I saw that the other trainers and keepers appreciated the
+danger, for they were gathered around, holding iron bars, Roman candles
+and pistols; but they had sense enough to know that any interference
+which would draw his attention from the cage would precipitate the
+trouble, and none of them could make Leotta appreciate the danger of her
+position. I went up to him quietly and told him that I thought he had
+better call the rehearsal off for the night, intending to square
+accounts with him as soon as Leotta was safely out of the cage; but the
+drink was in his brain and he turned on me and cursed me. Leotta gave a
+scream of terror as the brute turned his back on the cage and, as if by
+a preconcerted plan, every one of the six great beasts jumped for her.
+
+"Barton knew that the game was up, and in his drunken rage he attacked
+me and it kept my hands full to manage him; but the others rushed for
+the cage, and while Bonavita and Stevenson beat off the lions with the
+help of the keepers on the outside who were firing pistols and Roman
+candles and using fire-extinguishers through the bars, Bobby Mack picked
+up Leotta and carried her outside. Of course, that ended Leotta's career
+in the show business and finished Barton's employment with me. The poor
+little thing's beauty was gone, for a lion's claws make deep cuts, and
+it was many a day before she was able to leave the hospital. You can see
+that I have reason to be confident of the accuracy of the predictions of
+my weather bureau, for if there had been no thunderstorm brewing I might
+have developed a sensational lion act."
+
+"Or if Leotta had understood English," commented the Press Agent, as he
+beckoned to the waiter. "Of course, it is sometimes an advantage to have
+performers who can't converse with the audience, but it is mighty
+inconvenient if they can't understand the orders of the boss. I lost the
+chance of making a lot of money once, because a squaw who was working
+for us couldn't understand the white man's lingo. A guy named Merritt
+and myself were disappointed about getting a concession for a snake show
+at the Pan-American Exposition, and we found ourselves broke in Buffalo,
+which is separated from the Bowery by about five hundred miles of very
+tough walking when you haven't got the price of a railway ticket.
+Merritt was mad clean through at being thrown down by the Exposition
+managers, but he was an inventive genius and I knew that he would figure
+out a way to raise the price of transportation.
+
+[Illustration: _"A howl of terror from the platform."_]
+
+"'Jim,' says he as we counted up our available assets and found that
+they were pretty well along toward a minus quantity, 'it makes me dead
+sore to be turned down this way without getting a run for our money, and
+it's up to us to increase our capital and incidentally give the bunch
+that done us dirt the double cross. Get your think tank working and see
+what it will produce.' I couldn't see a way out, but when a squaw from
+the Tonawanda Reservation, who was selling trailing arbutus, came up to
+us and offered us a nosegay, Merritt gives a whoop and claps me on the
+shoulder.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'I've got it and we'll make our everlasting fortunes!'
+He commenced to question the squaw, but all the English she knew was
+'ten cent a bunch,' and he didn't make much headway until a big buck
+Injin who had been watching her from across the street came over and
+butted in. It appeared that he was her husband, and when Merritt stated
+his proposition the buck accepted the terms without the formality of
+consulting the squaw. When the Exposition opened we had a big tent on an
+open lot across from the main entrance, with a life-sized picture of
+'The Marvelous Mermaid' as big as a house. As I remarked, Merritt was an
+inventive genius and he had worked up a scheme to deceive the confiding
+public. He had provided a platform and carefully cut out a hole so that
+the squaw could stand on the ground and the edges of the hole fitted
+snugly about her waist. He made her lean forward and rest her chin in
+her hands in the conventionally accepted mermaid position, and then he
+fitted a fish tail which lay along the top of the platform, and it was
+so skillfully joined to her that it looked as if it grew there. She was
+a good-looking squaw and she certainly played her part and made an
+interesting picture.
+
+"Of course, he couldn't explain to her what he wanted her to do, but he
+would tell the buck, who would carefully translate and impress the
+instructions upon her memory with the aid of a bale stick. The thing
+which he put most stress upon was that she was to remain absolutely
+still, no matter what happened. I sold the tickets and put up the spiel
+on the front, and Merritt lectured inside and we did a land-office
+business. Lots of smart guys came around and tried to get gay with the
+mermaid, but she couldn't understand their joshing and never cracked a
+smile. The blame tent caught fire one night when it was filled with
+people, and she had such a wholesome recollection of the bale stick
+that she kept as still as a cigar-store Indian until we had cleared the
+place and put the fire out.
+
+"'Jim,' says Merritt as he looked her over admiringly after that
+experience, 'there is a great advantage in having a squaw for the top
+part of that there fish. She can't understand what the Willie boys say
+to her and nothing feazes her. A white gal would have had hysterics and
+given the whole snap away.' It gave Merritt a lot more confidence and we
+felt pretty safe after that experience, and neglected to have the buck
+repeat his bale-stick admonitions to her upon the necessity of
+cultivating repose of manner. Everything was lovely and we were turning
+hundreds of people away and making more money than the big show. One
+afternoon we were playing to a record house and Merritt was doing
+himself proud on his lecture.
+
+"'Ladies and gentlemen,' says he, 'I have the honor to present to this
+intelligent audience a creature which is commonly, but erroneously,
+supposed to be extinct at the present day; but you have before you a
+living and convincing proof that mermaids still exist. I confess that
+until I was able to obtain this unique specimen, which was captured
+while basking in the sun and singing a love song upon an iceberg in the
+Antarctic Ocean, I shared the opinions of my fellow scientists that the
+mermaid was a fabulous or extinct creature; for during a lifetime
+devoted to exhibiting the mysterious marvels of nature to the American
+public it had never been my good fortune to acquire one. You will
+observe that she is half woman and half fish, and she is perfectly
+helpless when out of the water. She is unfortunately unable to express
+herself in any known tongue; in fact, she has never uttered a sound
+since her capture and we fear that she has lost her voice, which--' Just
+then he was interrupted by a howl of terror from the platform, which was
+followed by a roar of laughter from the audience, and when he turned he
+saw the squaw standing up and trying to wrap the fake tail around a pair
+of well-developed, copper-colored legs. Her face was as pale as a
+squaw's face could get and Merritt knew the jig was up. I was peeking in
+the door, and when I saw what had happened I gathered up the box-office
+receipts and faded away. I met Merritt that evening in our usual saloon,
+and underneath a pair of black eyes and a battered-up phiz I could see
+that he was wearing a look of deep disgust.
+
+"'Jim,' says he, 'this is what comes from pinning your faith to a woman
+and not appreciating the weakness of the sex. She faced the danger of
+being burned alive and never turned a hair; but when she saw a measly
+little mouse crawl under the platform she busted up the whole show.'"
+
+The Stranger said good-night and started for the city, but before he
+reached the railway station he was drenched by the downpour which the
+Proprietor had predicted.
+
+
+
+
+MAKING A STAR LION AND AN INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE MEETING
+
+
+
+
+MAKING A STAR LION AND AN INTERRUPTED TEMPERANCE MEETING
+
+
+"You were not in this part of the country when New York was in an uproar
+for two days over the escape of one of my lions," said the Proprietor to
+the Stranger as they joined the Press Agent. "I suppose that ninety per
+cent. of the people who remember it think that it was all a fake, but I
+can assure you that I put in the most strenuous forty-eight hours of my
+career while he was loose, and it pretty nearly decided me to give up
+the show business. It was my first experience at running an independent
+show, and after great persuasion I had induced my father to let me bring
+some boxing kangaroos, two young lions and Wallace, a fine big brute
+about fifteen years old, from our English establishment to the States.
+Wallace was already a famous--or infamous--lion in England, where he
+had the score of three trainers to his credit. He had received the name
+of 'The Mankiller' over there, and they were rather relieved to have me
+get him out of the country.
+
+"His last victim was a Frenchman, one of the best-known trainers in the
+business, and he went into the cage to subdue Wallace on a wager. He
+won, and a remarkable performance it was, but I won't take the time to
+tell you about that now. He made just one little mistake: his vanity got
+the better of him when he turned his back on the lion to bow to the
+audience after remaining in the cage for ten minutes. As I said, he won
+the bet, and it about paid the funeral expenses of what was left of him.
+After that the only man who could go near Wallace was a half-breed
+American Indian from up near Cape Cod; Broncho Boccacio, he called
+himself. I don't know what the other half of him was, and I don't
+remember how he happened to be with our English show, but all sorts and
+conditions of men drift into the animal training business. At any rate,
+he was the only man who could do anything with Wallace, and that wasn't
+much. He would get into the cage and chase him around a bit and then
+jump out quick--always backward after seeing what happened to the
+Frenchman. I brought him along to take especial charge of the brute. It
+took a couple of days to get the animals through the customs, and in the
+meantime I cast about for quarters and finally rented a stable on
+Eighteenth Street to keep them in until I should secure an engagement."
+He took a pencil from his pocket and drew a plan on the white table top.
+
+[Illustration: _"There was a loose lion downstairs and a nurse and two
+children in the loft."_]
+
+"The stable was arranged in this way: here in the front was the carriage
+house with these narrow stairs at the side leading up to the loft. On
+each side of the door was a window facing on the street, and back of the
+carriage room was the stable proper--two stalls and a loose-box. On one
+side of the stable was a saloon and on the other a carpenter shop, so I
+didn't expect much complaint from my neighbors, as my men patronized
+one, while I ordered the carpenter to build a traveling cage for Wallace
+which would slide on wheels, as our English cages were too heavy to
+handle in a country where labor is as high as it is here. I moved the
+lions up to the stable to let them rest a bit after the voyage and
+started to look for an engagement. It was a hard row to hoe, as I was
+not known in this country, and the best I could do was a booking at a
+dime museum for a month, and I had to take a lowish price at that, but
+I ordered a big nine sheet poster and trusted to luck to make more out
+of them later.
+
+"The lions were in three cages in the stable, and in one of the stalls I
+had a trotting horse which had been purchased for my brother in England,
+and which I kept there until I should have an opportunity to ship it to
+the other side. The kangaroos were in the loft, and a couple of days
+after they were all settled my two little girls came over from the hotel
+with me one morning and went up there with the nurse to play with them
+while I went into the carpenter shop next door to settle for the new
+cage, which had just been delivered. Broncho, as soon as he struck his
+native soil, had discovered a camp of other Indians on the Bowery and
+spent most of his time in their encampment, leaving a Cockney Englishman
+in charge of the lions and the horse. I intended to wait until he
+arrived before shifting Wallace to the new cage, but the Englishman
+thought he would show his cleverness and attempted to do it alone
+without waiting for us. He threw a piece of meat into the new cage and
+then rolled it up to the old one, and when the doors were opposite each
+other he opened them. Of course Wallace made a spring for the meat in
+the new cage, but he struck the edge of the door, and as the Cockney had
+neglected to block the wheels the cage rolled away and the keeper gave a
+yell and bolted for the stairs. There was a loose lion downstairs--and a
+bad one at that--and the nurse and two children in the loft.
+
+"The first I knew of it was from the nurse, who had grabbed the children
+and stood with them in the door which had been used to pass the hay in,
+yelling 'Fire!' and 'Murder!' but I knew that there was hell to pay as
+soon as I reached the street, by the sound which came from the stable.
+We got a ladder from the carpenter shop and hustled the nurse and
+children down to the street, and then I went up to the loft, while the
+nurse and the Cockney held the small door from the stable to the street,
+which could not be fastened from the outside until the carpenter spiked
+some plank over it.
+
+"A look into the stable convinced me that I did not want to go down the
+stairs, for with one blow Wallace had converted a thousand-dollar
+trotting horse into two dollars' worth of lion meat, and he was crouched
+on the body, which he had dragged from the stall, clawing at its throat
+and drinking the blood. The place looked like a shambles, and the growls
+which came from Wallace as the other lions threw themselves against the
+bars of their cages in their efforts to get out and join in the feast
+were redoubled when he caught sight of my head through the trap-door. I
+slammed it down and drew the kangaroo cage on top of it and then went
+down to the street to see that the windows and doors were securely
+boarded up. A great crowd was gathering and I was afraid that the police
+would shoot the brute, for I saw the possibilities of an advertisement
+which would more than pay for the expensive meal which Wallace was
+making from the trotting horse.
+
+[Illustration: _"His vanity got the better of him when he turned his
+back on the lion, to bow to the audience."_]
+
+"Just as I reached the street, Broncho strolled up. As I said, he was a
+queer-looking guy; his skin was copper-colored and he had piercing black
+eyes and long, fuzzy black hair which fell down to his shoulders. His
+nose was hooked and something about his face always reminded me of a
+bird of prey. He was only a half-breed, but when I told him what had
+occurred he was all Indian and he drew a long knife and started for the
+Cockney, who gave only one look at the expression on Broncho's face and
+then started for Harlem, touching only the high spots until he was quite
+out of sight. Broncho didn't chase him; he just looked after him with a
+smile on his face, glad to see him disappear, as there had been more or
+less bad blood between them for a long time. Then he came to me and
+laughed at the idea of danger and offered to go into the stable and put
+Wallace back in the cage. I knew that it would be impossible until the
+lion had gorged himself on horse meat, and now that the damage was done
+I was in no hurry to allay the excitement until the police and reporters
+arrived. We didn't have to wait long, for the crowd had grown until the
+street was blocked, and, of course, the reporters asked more than a
+thousand questions. When I had worked the sensation up pretty well I
+consented to let Broncho take his training rod and go down, and I went
+with him carrying a club and a pitchfork. Things commenced to happen
+right away, for Wallace didn't wait for the call of time, but sailed
+right into us, and when I saw that he was getting the better of Broncho
+I made a bluff at going back to the carcass of the horse. Wallace
+bounded back to protect it and crouched on it, snarling viciously, but
+the delay gave me a chance to help Broncho up the stairway. There was
+not enough of his trousers left to wad a gun, and while I was bandaging
+up a deep claw wound in his thigh that advertisement seemed less and
+less important to me, and I would have given a good deal to have Wallace
+safely behind the bars of his cage again. He was contracted for four
+weeks anyway, and it takes a pretty big sensation to be remembered for
+more than thirty days in New York.
+
+"Well, we fussed about all day, trying to figure out some way to get the
+beggar back in his cage, and I got an earache listening to advice from
+people who had never seen a lion, but who considered themselves experts.
+At sunset Wallace still held the fort and the streets were blocked in
+all directions, for the afternoon papers were out with extras with
+scare-heads. The boards over the windows made the interior of the stable
+so dark that no one could see into it, but the roars which came from it
+gave the spectators all the thrills they were entitled to and caused a
+stampede every few minutes. We tried to drive Wallace into the cage
+with a stream of water from the fire plug, but he only shook his head
+and growled at it, so we gave it up and waited for daylight. There were
+about forty policemen and a crowd of reporters about the place all
+night, and I was getting nervous for fear some fool would shoot the
+lion, whose value was increasing every minute, so I kept awake and did
+a heap of thinking.
+
+[Illustration: _"Broncho was only a half-breed."_]
+
+"I knew that Wallace would fight for his 'kill' as long as any of the
+meat was left, so we rigged up a tackle to try and draw the carcass out.
+We were all ready at daylight and the crowd was bigger than ever. Say,
+if you want to count the idle people in New York just get up a free show
+at any hour of the day or night and they will all come. There must have
+been over a thousand loafing about the street all night. We were just
+getting ready to make a try for the horse when the idlers outside gave a
+cheer, and I saw an express wagon loaded with nets and ropes and all
+sorts of animal catching stuff drive up. Tody Hamilton, Barnum's press
+agent, had caught on to the possibilities of an advertisement, and sent
+to the winter quarters at Bridgeport for some of their animal men to
+come down and capture a loose lion. They supposed it was in Central
+Park, and when they found it was in a stable the job looked easy to
+them. One of them, a man named McDonald, had been with our English
+show, and when he heard that it was Wallace they were to tackle his
+enthusiasm seemed to melt. He told the others a few anecdotes of the
+lion, and two of them went to find the Cockney, I guess, for we never
+saw them again.
+
+"We managed to throw a slip noose around the carcass from the stairs,
+and when we passed the end of the rope out of the window there must have
+been five hundred men pulling on it from the way that horse's body slid
+across the floor. The four of us stood around the trap-door to beat
+Wallace back, and when he realized that he was losing his prey it kept
+us busy.
+
+"Say, a dead horse seems to have more legs than a centipede when you try
+to drag it through a narrow space, and they all stick out in different
+directions. Of course, this one stuck and then there was more trouble,
+for when I took an axe to dismember it, a cop threatened to arrest me
+for cutting up a horse in the city limits. It took three hours to
+satisfy the red-tape requirements and get a permit from the Board of
+Health, and then I had a long, sickening job, for we had to haul up
+what was left of the poor beast in fragments, and all the time Wallace
+was snapping at them or rushing at us. We gave him several nasty cracks
+over the snout, the only place where a lion seems to be sensitive to
+pain, but it only made him uglier than ever and I knew that there was a
+pretty fight ahead of us. It was a case of 'Perdicaris alive or Raisouli
+dead' with me, for the police were getting impatient, and I knew they
+would shoot him if we did not get him caged before night.
+
+"We drew lots to see who should be the first to go down, and I think
+that McDonald stacked the straws, for Broncho won--or lost--I was
+second, the other Barnum man third and McDonald last; but he made good
+after we got down there, and it was what the President would have called
+a 'crowded hour.' If Wallace hadn't been full of horse meat, which made
+him a trifle slow, I think he would have chased the bunch of us out, and
+as it was he gave us all we wanted to do. We used blank cartridges,
+Roman candles, training rods and whips, and I learned afterward that
+the crowd outside thought we were all being torn to pieces, but we
+finally conquered and it was a singed and battered lion which jumped
+back into the den and gave me a chance to slam the door. The noise of
+the clicking lock sounded good to me, and I went up the stairs with a
+lighter heart, in spite of tattered clothes and a scratched hand and
+bruised body. I knew that I had a small fortune in the beast, but I
+nearly cried when I went into the saloon to freshen up, and the first
+thing I saw was the poster with the announcement that Wallace would be
+shown at the dime museum. I knew that it would make the reporters, who
+had been writing columns of space, suspect that it was all a fake and
+prearranged. The manager was afraid that I would renege on my contract
+after all the free advertising, but he didn't know me.
+
+[Illustration: _"We didn't have any regular snake charmer, but Merritt
+made himself up for a Hindoo fakir."_]
+
+"Sure enough, the reporters came for me in a body while I was still
+tired and dirty from the fight and worn out with anxiety and loss of
+sleep. They accused me of having put up a job on them, but I guess the
+sight of my condition convinced them of my sincerity, for only one paper
+even hinted at any crookedness, and that proved the best advertisement
+in the whole business.
+
+"It was the _Sun_ which came out in an article about Wallace, saying
+that he was toothless and decrepit from old age, and that there had
+never been the slightest danger from him. If the reporter who wrote it
+had gone into the stable with us, I don't think he would have written
+the article. I did my own announcing in those days and I always started
+off with the announcement, 'Ladies and gentlemen! If you see it in the
+_Sun_, it's so, and the _Sun_ says that Wallace is played out and
+toothless from old age.' Then I would make a move to the front of the
+cage, and Wallace, who had a special hatred for me, would spring at the
+bars and show as pretty a set of fangs as you would wish to see and I
+was always sure of a laugh.
+
+"Well, I showed Wallace in New York and other cities for thirty straight
+weeks and got back the value of that trotter a good many times over,"
+continued the Proprietor as he rose from the table. "His name is one to
+conjure with, even yet, and nearly every lion which is exhibited in the
+side shows at the county fairs is billed as 'Wallace, the Untamable!'
+The original Wallace is still alive and at our English breeding
+establishment." He said good-night and left the table, the Press Agent
+looking regretfully after him.
+
+"That's just like the boss," he complained as he watched the retreating
+figure. "He takes the center of the stage until he has told his story,
+and when my turn comes to get in the limelight he does the disappearing
+act. That was a pretty good story, but talking of escapes, I can tell
+you about an escape that is worth talking about. It happened when a guy
+named Merritt and myself were running a snake show next to a camp
+meeting down on the Jersey coast. We didn't have any regular snake
+charmer, but we bought a lot of wrigglers from a dealer down on the
+Bowery and Merritt made himself up for a Hindoo fakir. He would get into
+the cage with them and those snakes would wrap themselves about him from
+his head to his toes and it was an awe-inspiring sight. He taught them
+to stand up on their tails and dance while he played on a tin whistle
+and to do other pretty little tricks, but the great and original stunt
+was what he called the 'Interminable Snake,' when one would grab the
+biggest snake's tail in his mouth, another would fasten onto him, and so
+on until the whole blame lot looked like one big serpent. Say, those
+snakes got so stuck on that game that they would do it for sport without
+the word of command. Whenever one started to move around the cage
+another would grab his tail, and the first thing you knew the whole
+bunch was going around in a string and the sight of it was enough to
+make a man swear off for a year.
+
+"We were doing a fine business until a temperance lecturer set up a show
+a little way off, and that cut into us so that there was nothing much
+doing. The crowd would walk right past the entrance to our 'Highly Moral
+and Instructive Exhibition,' and go on to listen to the temperance guy
+telling them about the evils of drink, as illustrated by the horrible
+living examples which he had upon the platform. You see that was a free
+show, while ours cost a quarter--and cheap at the price.
+
+"One afternoon after I had cracked my voice trying to draw the crowd
+without landing one of 'em, Merritt comes to me, and as we saw the crowd
+pouring in to the temperance show, we looked at each other and shook
+our heads in sorrow.
+
+"'Jim,' says Merritt, 'that guy down there has got you skinned to death
+on the ballyhoo, and it's up to you to go over there and get next to the
+attraction and see if we can't cop it out for our show. I hate to ask it
+of you,' says he, 'knowing your views on the temperance question, but
+business is business and this ain't no time for sentiment.' It went
+against the grain, but I knew it must be done, so I went down to the
+lecture. I wasn't wise to the game, but I was anxious not to miss a
+trick, so I went right up to the front, and the first thing I knew I was
+seated on the mourners' bench, right under the platform. As soon as the
+lecturer came on I piped him for a guy that used to pull teeth on the
+Bowery with a brass band accompaniment and a gasoline torch, and I
+remembered that at that time he could punish more booze than any man I
+ever knew. He had the gift of gab all right, and he had picked up a
+couple of panhandlers for horrible examples and they looked the part.
+If either one of them had ever drawn a sober breath in twenty years he
+should have sued his face for libel, and they looked as if they had been
+towed behind a trolley car from the Battery to Fort George.
+
+"Well, the ex-jaw carpenter cut loose in good form, and he soon had
+every one worked up, telling the horrible things which alcohol did to
+your interior lining, and giving a description of the menagerie which a
+man sees when he has the jim-jams, which would have done credit to the
+boss lecturer in there." He pointed with his thumb to the Arena, and the
+alert waiter, taking it for a signal, refilled the glasses.
+
+"He did it so well that he sort of had me going, and I was beginning to
+think that possibly I was taking a trifle too much," continued the Press
+Agent, as he sampled the fresh drink. "I was giving the matter serious
+thought, when my attention was attracted by one of the panhandlers who
+was nudging his partner.
+
+"'Bill,' says he, 'tell the old man to put on full steam ahead, for I'm
+backsliding and need encouragement. I'm afraid I've got 'em again. Look
+there!' Bill looks down the aisle and gets uneasy, too.
+
+"'Hank,' says he, 'I've got 'em, likewise, only that ain't my usual kind
+of snake, coz he ain't got no plug hat with a red flannel band on it;
+but it's me for the bromide and the simple life.'
+
+"'It's this damn Jersey whiskey that's changed 'em,' answers Bill. 'Mine
+always has gorillas ridin' 'em.' Well, I looked around and I would have
+been scared myself if I hadn't recognized our own bunch of snakes, each
+one of 'em with the tail of the snake in front of him in his mouth. Old
+'Limber Larry'--we called him that on account of his habit of going to
+sleep curled up in a true lover's knot--was in the lead, and behind him
+came about half a mile of snakes.
+
+"They were festooning themselves up the aisle, coming slow, because
+there were a couple of them which could not move very fast, and when the
+gait got too lively they used to bite their leaders' tails. Old Larry
+was raising his head and looking around every few feet, and just when
+the lecturer had reached the most thrilling part of his 'Ten Nights in a
+Barroom' spiel he caught Larry's eye and the meeting adjourned, _sine
+die_, right there. You couldn't see him for dust as he broke for the
+nearest 'speakeasy,' and the two panhandlers were hanging on to his coat
+tails.
+
+"Just then Merritt comes in looking worried, for he had gone to sleep
+and let 'em get away from him, but when he sees 'em he takes his tin
+whistle out of his pocket and goes back to the show, tooting it like a
+blasted Pied Piper, the snakes following along as meek as Mary's little
+lamb, and most of the audience goes with him at a quarter per."
+
+"Did business improve?" asked the Stranger.
+
+"Improve? Why, my boy, after we put that temperance show out of business
+we just turned 'em away for three months. Not only did we do a good
+business, but the hotel people put us on the free list at the bar,
+because Merritt used to take 'em down in 'Interminable Snake' formation
+for a dip in the ocean every morning, and the hotel press agent wrote it
+up as the daily appearance of the gigantic sea serpent."
+
+
+
+
+KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT
+
+
+
+
+KALSOMINING AN ELEPHANT
+
+
+A delegation from the National Association of Press Agents which was
+holding its annual meeting in the interests of the Furtherance of Truth
+and the Elevation of the Show Business had left the meeting place in New
+York, and after inspecting the various moral and entertaining
+performances at Coney Island was gathered about one of the white-topped
+tables near the Dreamland tower. Colonel Tody Hamilton, prince of press
+agents, master of a picturesque vocabulary, inventor of superlatives in
+the English language and champion of veracity, pointed laughingly toward
+the Arena, where the Proprietor of the trained animal exhibition was
+instructing a new barker how to make the most out of a trick of one of
+the elephants which was being used for ballyhoo purposes in front of
+the entrance to his show.
+
+"Listen to him, gentlemen, and you will be convinced that he is eligible
+to membership in our truth-loving fraternity," he remarked admiringly.
+The ungainly pachyderm was standing on its hind legs, trumpeting through
+its upraised trunk a protest against the prodding of the sharp goad
+which was forcing it to walk backward in that absurd position. The voice
+of the Proprietor, who was using a megaphone, came to them distinctly as
+he invited the people to look at "One of the greatest triumphs of the
+animal trainer's art; something which has never been exhibited in any
+country--an elephant WALKING UPON ITS HIND LEGS, BACKWARD!"
+
+The speech caught and held the attention of the crowd, and when the
+elephant was allowed to rejoin its companions and the three great beasts
+entered the building in single file, Tom grasping Roger's tail in his
+trunk and Alice following suit with the caudal appendage of Tom, a
+goodly number stepped up to the ticket booth and paid their entrance
+money. The Colonel and his associates, whose business had made them
+familiar with elephants, smiled at the credulity of the crowd, but
+acknowledged the Proprietor's skill in attracting an audience.
+
+[Illustration: _"Sam Watson confessed the whole thing."_]
+
+"You wouldn't believe that I spent over seven hundred dollars to turn
+that smallest elephant white a few years ago," said the Colonel as the
+waiter refilled their glasses, but his companions made unanimous
+protestation that they would believe any statement he made, and the
+Colonel settled back comfortably in his chair to tell the story which
+they demanded.
+
+"You will have to listen to the story of the famous war of the white
+elephants, then," he said, good-naturedly, "a struggle which will remain
+famous in the circus world as long as the big tops are spread. It was in
+the good old days of fierce competition in the business, the days when
+the press agents earned every dollar of their salaries, and sometimes
+had to go to the extent of saying things in print which were not
+strictly true. There was intense rivalry between the two big shows, the
+P. T. Barnum and the Forepaugh aggregations, and the bitter feeling
+between the proprietors was transmitted to the employees. The advance
+agents would steal each other's printed matter and posters out of the
+express offices, and you could always count on a fight between the
+canvas men whenever the two shows were close enough together. They
+would damage each other's property, loosen nuts on the wagons so that
+the wheels would come off and cause upsets, and do anything to embarrass
+the rival show.
+
+"Each show tried to outdo the other at every point; advertising, number
+of performers, length of the street parade, menagerie collection and
+everything which money could buy. They started in to see which could get
+the largest herd of elephants, each advertising the largest herd in
+captivity, and that competition raised the price of elephants all over
+the world and denuded every small zoological park in Europe, while it
+pretty nearly bankrupted the shows to feed them. We had eighty with the
+Barnum circus, and finally Mr. Barnum came to me and said that he had
+purchased a Sacred White Elephant and told me to start giving it
+publicity. Of course, I didn't know anything about that particular kind
+of elephant, but as I always like to be perfectly accurate in my
+statements I made a scientific study of it. I found that, as a matter
+of fact, there was no such thing as a white elephant known in natural
+history, although there was an occasional absence of the usual pigment
+in the skins of some beasts which give them a trifle lighter color, and
+that these animals were apt to have a few spots on the body which were
+nearly white, just as you sometimes hear of a negro who is spotted. When
+such a spot occurs in the center of the forehead the Buddhists regard
+the beast as sacred, from the fact that the god, Buddha, is always
+depicted as wearing a jewel in that position and it is looked upon as
+his special mark of protection. It is the ambition of every Indian Rajah
+to possess one, for then he is billed as 'The Lord of the Sacred White
+Elephant,' a title which seems to fill a long-felt want in the heart of
+an Oriental potentate.
+
+"Well, Barnum's agent had, by some hook or crook, procured one of these
+and sent it to London, but owing to the lateness of the season it was
+decided to leave it there in the Zoological Gardens and get up a
+controversy which, in itself, would be a good advertisement for it. The
+average Englishman is very fond of writing to the _Times_ to expose a
+fraud, and we knew that there would be a protest from those who would be
+disappointed in the brute's color. There are hundreds of retired
+officers who have served in India living in London, and they know all
+about Sacred White Elephants, and time hangs heavily on their hands.
+They were only too anxious to certify to its genuineness, and they wrote
+the peppery kind of replies to the criticisms which might be expected
+from men who had spent the best years of their lives under a hot sun and
+lived upon curries and red peppers. Of course, I saw that the letters
+were copied in the home papers, and before the circus season opened I
+had the Great American Public watching anxiously for the reported
+sailing of the Sacred White Elephant.
+
+[Illustration: _"Walking upon its hind legs, BACKWARD."_]
+
+"I should have been on my guard, for the Forepaugh bunch just kept
+sawing wood and saying nothing, but whenever I met their press agent he
+gave me the quiet laugh. Our elephant was finally shipped, and you can
+imagine that I made the most of it in the papers. I had 'em filled up
+for two days, and then, while ours was still in mid-ocean, out comes
+Forepaugh's announcement that his Sacred White Elephant would land in
+New York the following day. I knew it was a fake, for they were very
+difficult to obtain, but they stole our thunder, just the same. I
+managed to get a peep at it while it was being unloaded, and although it
+was only a dirty yellowish color, I knew that it would make ours look
+like a decided brunette by comparison. They had worked it well and kept
+it quiet, but knowing that there was a nigger in the woodpile and that
+money would bring him out, I spent it like a drunken sailor in trying to
+get information.
+
+"Forepaugh had eminent scientists examine the beast and give their
+certificates that it was genuine, and all the inside information I could
+get was that the elephant had been purchased through Cross, the great
+animal dealer in Liverpool, and that it had been kept secluded in his
+place there all winter. Sam Watson, who was Forepaugh's foreign agent,
+and his groom, a man named Telford, were the only people who had access
+to it, and they had spent hours every day in its stall. Cross would give
+us no information as to how or where he obtained the elephant, for
+Forepaugh bought all of the animals for his menagerie through him,
+while we dealt with his great rival, Hagenbeck, of Hamburg.
+
+"Forepaugh got all the newspaper space for the next few days, and when
+our elephant finally arrived it looked mighty dark-colored for a white
+elephant when compared with the fake one. It was hard to educate the
+people up to the significance of the little white spot in the center of
+the forehead, but any one but a blind man could see that Forepaugh's
+fake was lighter in color. We went at it, horse, foot and artillery, and
+the fight cost the two shows more than a quarter of a million dollars,
+and lasted until we patched up a truce in St. Louis to save us both
+going into bankruptcy. I got some of Cross's employees to swear that
+they had seen the elephant being painted in Liverpool, and Forepaugh
+replied by getting a commission of scientific sharps from Ann Arbor to
+examine the beast and swear that the color was natural. There was good
+money in perjury and scientific opinions those days, but I never let up
+for a minute in my endeavor to get at the truth of the matter, for I
+knew it was hanky panky and I am a diligent searcher after truth,
+especially when a rival has sunk it to the bottom of a well. I
+experimented with some of our elephants until I nearly took their thick
+hides off, but I could get no satisfactory results until I called in
+Marchand, the chemist, and asked him if he could give me something to
+bleach an elephant. He had an especially strong solution of peroxide of
+hydrogen made up, and I selected the smallest animal out of our herd of
+eighty to try it on. It happened to be the one which you just saw
+working on the ballyhoo over there, which you noticed was the ordinary
+slate color. We soaked cloths in the peroxide and covered the beast with
+them and then put blankets on top. After they had been on for awhile we
+washed the animal with ammonia and water and repeated the performance
+until that elephant was as white as snow.
+
+[Illustration: _"Forepaugh had eminent scientists examine the beast."_]
+
+"Forepaugh was to open in Philadelphia, so I shipped our fake over
+there, and when they had their street parade I followed right behind it
+with our bleached animal on a truck which was liberally placarded. The
+notices called attention to the fact that Forepaugh's alleged sacred
+elephant was simply painted and that the men who did it were bunglers at
+the business. 'LOOK AT THIS ONE!' read our largest placard. 'WE TELL
+YOU THAT IT IS A FAKE! So is Forepaugh's, but he won't tell! This is A
+BETTER JOB BY A BETTER ARTIST!' That made the Forepaugh people hot, and
+they replied with a new bunch of affidavits and expert opinions from a
+lot of University of Pennsylvania professors. That couldn't offset our
+show-up, though, and the whole situation had become so mixed that the
+public thought all of the elephants were fakes. We had the only genuine
+one and the best fake also, but they were a pair of white elephants in
+every sense of the term, and a losing proposition. The one which we had
+bleached would only keep white for about two weeks, and as each
+treatment cost seven hundred dollars Barnum called me off. The Forepaugh
+bunch was trying to poison it, and as the whole thing was dead as a
+money-making venture and white elephants a drug in the market, we let
+this one regain its natural color. When the great herd was broken up it
+was sold off, and I never saw it again until to-night."
+
+"But what was the inside history of the Forepaugh white elephant?" asked
+one of his companions, and the Colonel smiled as he lighted a fresh
+cigar.
+
+"I never knew it until this year, when one night over a friendly drink
+Sam Watson, who is now a clown with the Big Show, confessed the whole
+thing. Forepaugh is dead and the shows have been consolidated, so there
+is no further object in keeping the thing quiet. It seems that
+Forepaugh's agents found out that Barnum had purchased the elephant from
+an impecunious Indian Rajah; in fact, he had purchased two, the first
+one having died on its way to England. It was the misdirection of a
+cable announcing the death and ordering another at any cost which put
+them wise to the fact that Barnum had a rarity. Watson had never heard
+of a sacred elephant, but he started out to get one when he read that
+cablegram. They were scarce articles, and Barnum had bought the only two
+which were to be had for love or money in all India, so he and Cross got
+their heads together and started out to manufacture a bogus one in
+Liverpool.
+
+"They prepared a closed stall, which was always kept locked, and put an
+elephant in it--just a common, or garden, elephant. Then Sam and his
+groom, Telford, proceeded to get busy with bath bricks, pumice stone
+and a barrel of white aniline dye. I imagine they had a pretty hard
+winter's work and it was certainly a tough period for the elephant,
+because they had to scrape about half the skin off the poor brute before
+the dye would take hold. They finally succeeded in getting him several
+shades lighter than normal, all except about eighteen inches at the end
+of the trunk. They could do nothing with that on account of the habit of
+the beast, which was always mussing around in its bedding, searching for
+stray peanuts.
+
+[Illustration: _"Then Sam and his groom, Telford, proceeded to get
+busy."_]
+
+"They kept in touch with the London Zoo and found out when we were to
+ship the genuine one, and then got their fake on a steamer which would
+land it in New York a few days ahead of us. Of course, they had to keep
+working at it all the way over, but they kept it quiet and no one caught
+on. When the scientific sharps came to examine it, Sam would hoist the
+trunk up in the air while he drew their attention to the marvelous
+whiteness of the under side, and no one caught on to the fact that the
+end of the trunk was the natural color.
+
+"He let them remove some bits of skin for microscopic examination to
+prove that no dye was used, but he always had them taken from the inner
+side of the foreleg near the body, from which the natural pigment is
+absent in all elephants. Sam swears that they never had to fix one of
+the experts; they were only too anxious to get the advertisement, and
+they were prepared to swear, and did in this particular case, that black
+was white.
+
+"I have a few gray hairs in my head, and most of them came during the
+strain of that fight. The game isn't what it used to be and I'm glad
+that it isn't, and let me tell you, as a result of long experience, that
+the worst thing which can happen to a man is to have a white elephant,
+fake or genuine, on his hands."
+
+
+
+
+THE HYPNOTIC BEAR AND THE SENTIMENTAL LECTURER
+
+
+
+
+THE HYPNOTIC BEAR AND THE SENTIMENTAL LECTURER
+
+
+The doctor shook his head as he slipped his ophthalmoscope into his
+pocket, and Rey, the trainer, who had been holding the bear's head still
+while the oculist made the examination, opened the door of the cage for
+him. The bear--a medium-sized black animal--wandered aimlessly about,
+stumbling over the water pan and knocking its head against the bars, its
+eyes, which were evidently sightless, shining like two fiery opals as
+they reflected the electric light.
+
+"I am sorry to tell you that it is a hopeless case," said the physician
+to the Proprietor, who was standing with the Stranger in front of the
+cage watching the examination. "Both optic nerves are atrophied, and
+the animal must have received some serious injury, possibly a heavy
+blow on the forehead." The Proprietor, who has the reputation of being a
+"good loser," thanked him and gave some directions to the trainer about
+the care of the animal before leading the way to the table in front of
+the Arena, where the Press Agent was waiting for them.
+
+"It is rather unusual to call the most famous specialist in the country
+to examine a menagerie animal," he said, after the doctor hurriedly left
+them to catch the express train back to the city. "You know that he
+takes no small fee; his services are either given for charity or his
+charge is very high--and this visit was not for charity."
+
+"I should think that the value of a bear would hardly warrant the
+expense," answered the Stranger as the waiter filled the glasses.
+
+"It wouldn't be for an ordinary bear, but I was willing to pay anything
+in reason to restore the sight of this particular specimen, so I sent
+for the best-known oculist in New York. The decision which he has just
+given will probably mean a loss of thousands of dollars to me, but that
+is one of the risks which I have to assume. Would it interest you to
+hear a rather unusual romance of the menagerie business?" The Stranger
+gave eager assent, and the Press Agent settled himself comfortably and
+lighted a cigar.
+
+[Illustration: _"There seems to be a sympathy between them."_]
+
+"You have no idea how many animals are offered to the owner of a
+menagerie and from what unusual sources the offers come," said the
+Proprietor. "Travelers in far countries bring back strange animals as
+pets or curiosities; people buy young wild animals which get beyond
+control when they mature and become veritable white elephants on their
+hands, and their owners have to dispose of them. I have had everything
+from monkeys to lions brought to me, and so it did not surprise me when
+an artist came to the Hippodrome in Paris last winter and asked me if I
+didn't want to purchase a bear. He seemed anxious for me to see it
+immediately, and at his earnest solicitation I got in a cab with him and
+drove to his studio, which was situated on the far side of the Seine.
+The bear which you saw examined to-night was in a small room adjoining
+the studio, chained to a ring in the wall.
+
+"The apartment was luxuriously furnished, and I realized that it was not
+lack of ready money which made the artist so anxious to dispose of the
+brute; but he seemed in a desperate hurry to have me take it away, and
+offered it for such a low price that I closed the bargain at once. I
+suggested sending one of my men for it in the evening, but he insisted
+upon my taking it with me, and as the bear was evidently as gentle as a
+kitten I called a closed cab and drove away with it. The bear sat
+comfortably on the seat beside me and gave no trouble, but as we drove
+along I got to thinking the matter over and the whole proceeding seemed
+a little strange. I had Mephisto, as the bear was named, put in a cage
+well away from the other animals--a sort of quarantine precaution which
+I always take with new arrivals--and as there was apparently nothing
+unusual about him gave him little attention, there being for the moment
+no group of animals in training for which he would be available. I soon
+noticed that during the intermissions, when the audience wandered about
+and examined the animals in the cages, there was always a crowd of women
+about his den; but I thought that it was because he was such an
+inveterate beggar, and had a habit of standing at the bars with his
+mouth wide open, waiting for some one to flick a lump of sugar into it.
+
+"The bear had given us no trouble, and there was only one peculiar thing
+about him: he seemed to have an aversion to cats. The bodies of three of
+them had been found in front of his cage, although we had never seen one
+killed. The cats about a menagerie instinctively keep out of harm's way,
+and it puzzled me to know how Mephisto had managed to get them within
+reach of his heavy paw. Jack Bonavita, who fusses about his lions at all
+hours of the day and night, solved that mystery and incidentally saved
+his pet cat, Tramp, from an untimely ending. Tramp has been with Jack
+for years and appreciates the folly of venturing within reach of the
+animals in the cages, but Bonavita came across him in front of
+Mephisto's cage in the middle of the night. The bear was absolutely
+quiet, lying with its head on its paws and its eyes, which glistened
+like two points of flame, fixed on the cat. Tramp was staring at it in
+turn and slowly drawing nearer to the cage, apparently struggling
+against some influence which was stronger than its will. Bonavita
+watched them for a few minutes, but before the cat ventured within
+striking distance he picked it up and carried it away, while Mephisto,
+growling with rage, tried to break through the stout bars and get at it.
+
+[Illustration: _"Tramp was slowly drawing nearer to the cage."_]
+
+"Two days before we were to sail for America I was sitting at my desk
+arranging some of the last details of shipment, when the door burst open
+and a well-dressed, handsome woman rushed in, followed by the artist who
+had sold me the bear. She was in a tearing rage and jabbering excitedly
+in a language which I did not understand, while the artist was trying to
+quiet her. She pushed him aside, and opening a purse which was well
+stuffed with banknotes, she asked in French, which she spoke with a
+marked foreign accent, for how much I would sell Mephisto. The artist
+protested, but she turned on him and gave him a tongue lashing of which
+I could guess the meaning, although the words were unintelligible to me.
+I couldn't quite grasp the situation, but the strange hypnotic power
+which the bear apparently exercised over cats had excited my curiosity,
+and I wished to investigate it at my leisure, so I politely but
+positively refused to name a price, and told her the animal was not for
+sale. The artist seemed relieved and she was very much disappointed, but
+she quieted down and asked me what I intended to do with the animal. I
+told her that I was taking it to America, where it would be put in a
+mixed group which Rey was to train, and after inquiring when we were to
+sail, they left the office.
+
+"I regretted that I had not taken the opportunity to find out something
+about the history of the animal, and looked over the audience to try to
+locate the couple, but they had left the building. One of the keepers
+told me that she had screamed when she recognized the bear and called it
+by name. She was trying to bribe him to let her go into the cage when
+the artist came up and expostulated with her, and they had an awful row
+before coming to my office. I heard nothing more from them and we
+shipped the animals at Havre the following day. The traveling dens were
+placed in the 'tween decks, which is not a pleasant place to be when the
+ship is tossing about, and I was surprised the second day out to find
+the woman who had tried to purchase Mephisto standing in front of his
+cage in that smelly place, talking to the bear as if it were a child.
+She laughed when I came up to her, and told me that as I would not part
+with the bear I would have to take her with the show. I, too, laughed,
+for I have a large family of daughters, and I knew that the simple
+traveling gown which she wore had cost more than two months' salary of
+my best trainer, but to my great surprise she was in dead earnest, and
+asked me seriously if I would not let her train a group of animals."
+
+The Press Agent grew very attentive, but the Proprietor told him that he
+was not talking for publication, and that a name which occupied several
+pages of the Almanach de Gotha was sacred, even from an American
+promoter of publicity.
+
+"And she does carry that name and was born to it," he continued, "but I
+can't tell you what it is. She didn't tell it to me and it was not on
+the passenger list, but the ambassador from a great European nation came
+on from Washington to see her and remonstrate with her and to influence
+me to exclude her from the show. I wouldn't consent to that, but I am
+afraid that the accident of the bear's going blind will be the cause of
+my losing an act which promised to be sensational."
+
+[Illustration: _"The bear sat comfortably on the seat beside me."_]
+
+"You have kept it quiet enough," said the Press Agent with a trace of
+resentment in his voice. "It sounds to me as if it ought to be good for
+a front-page column in every New York paper."
+
+"As I told you, there are reasons why I can't exploit it," answered the
+Proprietor. "I am counting upon it for my opening sensation at the Paris
+Hippodrome next winter, and I don't intend to discount it before a Coney
+Island audience. But to get back to my experience with her on the
+steamer. I found that she occupied the most expensive deck stateroom,
+and had a maid and a man servant traveling with her; so that I refused
+all of her renewed offers for the bear when I found the powerful
+fascination it had for her, and I finally consented to let her try the
+experiment of working with a group of animals. You know the class from
+which trainers are usually recruited, and you can imagine the interest
+I take in a woman who possesses an absolute fearlessness which is
+inherited from generations of ancestors who have never shown the white
+feather, in addition to education and intelligence. The only thing which
+puzzled me was her motive, and that I have not discovered yet, although
+the ambassador, who had received all sorts of communications about her
+from his own government, told me her history. It seems that she has
+always been noted for her eccentricity and her rebellion against the
+strict laws of convention which were supposed to control her life, and
+this is not the first time she has defied them. She had commissioned the
+artist--who, by the way, is one of the most celebrated men in Paris--to
+paint a portrait of her. At the same time he was painting an exhibition
+picture to be called the 'Dancing Bear,' and had purchased Mephisto for
+a model. The picture was to represent the bear dancing on its hind legs
+opposite a woman, to the music of a flageolet played by a man bear
+leader--such an exhibition as is commonly given at the country fairs
+throughout Europe. He had no difficulty in getting a male model, but he
+was in despair about the woman dancer. He tried model after model, and
+although they started in all right each one became so nervous after a
+sitting or two that they refused to continue. The bear was chained to
+the wall and they were posed safely out of reach, but each of them
+asserted that the animal was like a serpent and trying to charm them so
+that they would come close enough to be caught. They were all afraid
+that they might yield to the fascination and be seriously injured.
+Tramp, the cat, would probably have told the same story if he had been
+able to talk.
+
+"As a matter of curiosity the artist experimented with men, but the bear
+appeared indifferent to them and the men made no complaint. It only
+seemed to exercise this strange hypnotic power over women--and cats--for
+the artist found two Persian felines, which had been studio pets, dead
+beside it; simply crushed, as were those which were killed by the bear
+at the Hippodrome. He mentioned the matter during one of the sittings
+for the portrait, and the lady, being curious to see the animal, came to
+his studio--and then the trouble commenced. She developed a most
+unaccountable attachment for Mephisto, and he was as gentle as a lamb
+with her. They would sit facing each other by the hour, and the artist
+swore they talked to each other and understood each other perfectly. The
+animal never attempted to harm her, but the artist became alarmed for
+fear there should be an accident, and believing that there was something
+uncanny about the brute, he decided to get rid of it and sold it to me.
+
+"Well, I watched her with the bear on shipboard and since we landed, and
+I can't yet understand her control over it, for it does not control her
+in any way. There seems to be a sympathy between them which makes them
+absolutely understand each other, and through it she understands the
+other caged beasts. The act which I had framed for her when I found that
+she was absolutely in earnest was a dance to be given in the midst of a
+group of adult lions. The lady is absolutely fearless and approved the
+plan, but stipulated that she should select the lions.
+
+"'I have means of knowing which ones will behave and which are such
+idiots that they can't be controlled if anything goes wrong,' she
+answered when I suggested that I was a better judge of the dispositions
+of the lions. 'I don't intend to have my beauty spoiled,' she said, 'and
+I only want beasts which are intelligent. No one can trust a fool.'
+Perhaps I have fallen under her influence, which according to her
+standard should indicate intelligence, for I have given way at every
+point and her judgment has proved correct, for in rehearsing the act she
+has perfect control over the animals, three of which I considered the
+most vicious in the menagerie. I let her take them in fear and
+trembling.
+
+"For the past three days she has been anxious and uneasy about the bear
+and has insisted that it was rapidly going blind. She says that the bear
+is her teacher about things in the animal world, and that she can tell
+what it is thinking about. Its eyes look perfectly sound, and it is only
+for two days that we have noticed anything wrong with it. Mephisto knew
+its way about its old cage so well that it gave no evidence of
+blindness, and a bear is naturally clumsy in its movements, but when we
+moved it to a strange den it stumbled over everything. I experimented by
+bringing Tramp in front of its cage, but with the loss of sight the
+hypnotic power has apparently deserted it, and the cat paid no attention
+to it. Finally I called in the doctor and you heard him pronounce his
+verdict."
+
+"But where is the great loss?" asked the Stranger.
+
+"It is principally a loss in prospective profits," replied the
+Proprietor as he beckoned to the waiter. "I had the new act all planned
+out for Paris--the lady was to appear masked for her performance, but I
+knew her identity would be discovered and that it would be a tremendous
+sensation. I don't know how much of her desire to train animals is due
+to eccentricity and as a protest against the conventions which hedged
+in her former life, and how much to her strange infatuation for
+Mephisto, but since its blindness has developed she has lost interest
+and I suppose she will renege on the whole business."
+
+"How do you account for it all--her infatuation for the bear and her
+intuitive knowledge of the dispositions of the lions?" asked the
+Stranger.
+
+"I don't try to account for anything. It is one of the thousand things
+about animals and the million things about women which no mere man can
+understand," replied the Proprietor laughing. "I have simply given you
+the facts of the situation and you can draw your own conclusions, but
+the bear's blindness upsets my plans and possibly prevents a sensation
+in circles which approach royalty."
+
+"Women _are_ difficult to understand," agreed the Press Agent as the
+Proprietor paused to moisten his throat, "and a man who is in love with
+one of 'em is just about as unaccountable for his actions. I had that
+fact engraved upon the tablets of my memory when a guy named Merritt and
+myself were running a dime museum in Pittsburg. Merritt was a good,
+hard-headed business man as a rule and he made a first-class lecturer;
+but when I found that he was taking to 'dropping into poetry' and
+delivering his descriptions of the freaks in verse, I began to get leary
+about the condition of the contents of his head. The poetry was always
+extemporaneous and was pretty bad, but it amused the crowd when it
+wasn't too sentimental.
+
+"As I say, the poetry was strictly on the bum, but what it lacked in
+quality it made up in quantity and he could spiel it off by the yard.
+Whenever he got stuck for a rhyme he would blow the whistle which he
+used to call the crowd in front of the freak he was lecturing about and
+move to the next platform. That didn't happen often, but whenever we had
+a Circassian Beauty among the freaks Merritt's poetry got so sentimental
+that no one but a bride and groom could stand for it--and it had to be
+early in the honeymoon at that. He would ring in turtle doves and azure
+skies and all the wishy-washy things in natural history and mythology
+and it was positively sickening.
+
+"He sure had a soft place in his heart for Circassian Beauties, and as
+they were as common as wire tappers on Broadway under a reform
+administration he was always getting sentimental. We used to get a new
+lot of freaks each week; our agent in New York engaged 'em and sent on
+the advertising matter ahead, and when we looked over the list I could
+see Merritt's face brighten up if there happened to be one of the fuzzy
+blondes included in the bunch.
+
+"Business was good, in spite of Merritt's poetry, so that I didn't kick
+when I saw that another one was coming. It was a good assortment: a
+Legless Wonder, The Man Who Breaks Paving Stones With His Bare Fists, a
+pair of Siamese Twins, a Leopard Boy and a particularly fuzzy Circassian
+Beauty. I saw Merritt's eyes grow soft when he looked at her photograph,
+and I prayed for a large proportion of the newly wedded among the
+audience that week.
+
+[Illustration: _"He made sheep's eyes and threw a chest."_]
+
+"Well, Merritt starts in with the Stone Breaker and restrains himself
+pretty well; the only sentiment he got in was a fervent wish that 'a
+certain blonde beauty, with eyes of cerulean blue, would not break a
+heart which time would prove tender and true,' as ruthlessly as this man
+cracked rocks. He was gradually working up to the blonde, you
+understand, and he got warmer as he approached. The next one was the
+Legless Wonder, and he got a little tangled up in his comparisons when
+he sprung his poetry about him and tried to ring in the Circassian, and
+he had to blow his whistle like blazes to spare the blushes of the
+audience. The Siamese Twins gave him a good opening about 'bonds
+eternal' and the 'season vernal' and he didn't do a thing with it. The
+Leopard Boy was a cinch for him as he declaimed that
+
+    "'They say that beauty is but skin deep.
+    And as you gaze upon this freak,
+    You will, I think, agree with me,
+    That though beneath he fair may be,
+    You'd much prefer to look the same
+    As the fair being who next will claim
+    Our admiration and attention,
+    With charms too numerous to mention.'
+
+"That made the Leopard Boy mad, for you know that freaks are as proud of
+their deformities as a mother is of a new baby, and look on normal
+people as objects of pity. But Merritt blew his whistle and passed on to
+the Circassian, and he made sheep's eyes and threw a chest as his
+fingers toyed with her peroxide locks. Say, it was sickening to listen
+to, and I saw that even the Stone Breaker was showing signs of distress
+and couldn't stand much of it. He bore up pretty well at first, while
+Merritt stuck to describing the 'golden locks and eyes of blue,' but
+when he got to the 'sugar is sweet and so are you,' stage he commenced
+to get mad and moved over to the platform.
+
+"'Say, Mag,' says he, 'get down offen dat staige an' come away from de
+guy. It ain't in our contrac' dat we has ter stand for his gettin' soft
+on youse an' stringin' youse like dat. Come down, er I'll climb up an'
+break his face fer him.'
+
+"'Sure, Mike,' says the blonde, and climbs down. That made Merritt mad
+and he talks real English without any poetic frills for a minute. He
+allowed that he could lick any Stone Breaker that ever came off the
+Bowery, and when he started to prove it there was a mix-up which made
+the breaking up of 'The Society upon the Stanislaus' look like a fist
+fight between two Frenchmen. The walls were covered with curiosities
+from all over the world, and pretty soon they were flying through the
+air. Merritt yanked down an Indian war club and started for the Stone
+Breaker and somebody swatted him over the head with a mummy. The Legless
+Wonder couldn't join in, but he contributed a two-headed calf which was
+preserved in a jar of alcohol, and the Leopard Boy grabbed a bunch of
+Zulu spears and prodded every one in reach. Even the blonde was
+something of a scrapper and she mixed in with a miscellaneous assortment
+of stuffed animals and preserved specimens, to say nothing of some
+choice language which she hadn't learned in Circassia. The place was
+pretty well wrecked by the time the police arrived and separated the
+fighters.
+
+"'What's all this row about, anyway?' asks the sergeant after they had
+quieted things down.
+
+"'Dat guy was tryin' to get nex' to me wife, de Circassian Beaut','
+answers the Stone Breaker. 'He spouts bum poetry about her, an' I won't
+stand fer it, see? Leave me go an' I'll crack his nut as easy as I would
+a pavin' stone.' Merritt had lots of fight left in him and tried to
+break loose, but the Circassian's remarks wilted him and I never knew
+him to use poetry again.
+
+"'Aw, wot's de use, Mike?' says she. 'Youse can't crack a ting dat ain't
+hard, an' his sky-piece is made of mush.'"
+
+
+
+
+THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS AND THE POWER OF HYPNOTISM
+
+
+
+
+THE TRAGEDY OF THE TIGERS AND THE POWER OF HYPNOTISM
+
+
+Chauncey Depew was at the bottom of all the trouble; not the punctured
+senator from the state of New York, but his namesake, one of the
+handsomest double-striped royal Bengal tigers ever captured. Depew was
+the central figure in the group which Miller, the trainer of tigers, had
+worked so hard to educate, and it was his rebellion which made the
+teacher's labors of years come to naught. Late in the season, after
+months spent in giving the finishing touches to their education while
+they were with a small part of the show which was exhibited near
+Cleveland, the tigers were brought to Dreamland; a group of eight
+magnificent beasts, all jungle bred and each worthy of a place in any
+menagerie. Perhaps it was the discomfort of the journey in the small
+traveling cages, possibly the change in the surroundings and the
+nearness of the other animals excited them; but whatever the cause,
+there was trouble in the narrow runway at the back of the dens when they
+entered it to go to the exhibition cage for their first Coney Island
+appearance.
+
+The sound of their snarling and growling, the reports of pistol shots
+and the cracking of training whips caused a sensation of uneasiness in
+the audience until the first tiger bounded through the door at the back
+of the cage, closely followed by a half-dozen others. Dangerous beasts
+they looked as they threw themselves against the stout bars, which
+rattled from the impact of their great bodies, and the front seats of
+the auditorium were quickly vacated by the audience. The noise in the
+runway continued, but the deep throaty growls which came from behind the
+dens were of a different quality from the snarling and yapping of the
+seven beasts in the exhibition cage, and when the last of the tigers
+appeared in the doorway the first arrivals made renewed efforts to
+escape through the bars.
+
+[Illustration: _"The first tiger bounded through the door."_]
+
+It was Depew; not the good-natured-looking great cat whose
+"I-have-eaten-the-canary" expression and smug whiskers had suggested his
+name, but a jungle tiger who had "gone bad," as the animal trainers call
+it, and who stood for a moment in the doorway, wrathfully surveying his
+frantic companions and selecting a victim. Froth was dripping from his
+snarling lips, his small eyes were blazing like two points of flame, the
+hair on his neck and back stood up like bristles, and his great tail
+struck the door-casing resounding whacks, as he lashed it from side to
+side. Only a moment he stood there, and then the great striped body
+hurtled through the air as if shot from a catapult, and covering a good
+twenty feet in the spring it landed fair on Bombay, one of the largest
+tigers in the group. The aim was a true one and the sound of breaking
+bone mingled with a scream of pain from his victim, as Bombay sank under
+the weight of the blow, his cervical vertebrae crushed between Depew's
+powerful jaws.
+
+The door had been closed behind Depew when he made his spring, and the
+other tigers were chasing madly about the great cage, looking for a
+chance to escape. There was no desire to fight left in them, but when
+they collided with each other they snapped and struck with the instinct
+of self-preservation, their sharp claws and teeth cutting gashes in the
+sleek striped coats. It was evident that all training had been
+forgotten, that fear of anything so puny as man had departed from the
+minds of the tigers, and a groan went up from the audience when the door
+was opened and quickly closed behind Miller, the trainer, who stood,
+whip and training rod in hand, in the cage with the maddened animals. He
+went about his work as quietly as if it were only an ordinary
+performance, his object being to return his pupils to their dens before
+further damage was done and to try to make them recognize that they were
+obeying him.
+
+Depew was still crouched on the body of his victim, biting at the neck
+and growling ferociously, his tail lashing from side to side. Miller
+never took his eyes from him and kept between him and the door as he
+called the others by name and tried to regain control of them. One tiger
+after another was released, glad of the opportunity to escape, as the
+door to the runway was opened at Miller's signal, until only Depew, the
+body of Bombay and the trainer occupied the cage.
+
+The other tigers had entered into a general free fight in the runway,
+but the noise of their bickering was unheeded in the excitement of the
+contest in the exhibition cage. Depew rose as Miller cracked his whip
+and approached him, and made a rush which the trainer met with his
+pronged training rod, driving it hard between the widely opened jaws
+while his whip rained blows upon the tiger's face. But he was only
+checked for a moment, and under his fiercer attack the trainer was
+forced to give ground. They were so close that the tiger could not
+spring, but he struck savagely with his great forepaws and tried again
+and again to pass the guard which Miller maintained with the training
+rod, using it as a fencer uses a foil. It was an unequal contest and the
+trainer realized that he was beaten; Depew would not be driven from the
+cage. The useless training whip was discarded and a savage rush from the
+tiger was met by a pistol shot in the face, blank cartridge, of course,
+but effective for a moment. Five more shots followed in quick succession
+and the trainer backed quickly toward the door, when his foot slipped,
+he was on his back, and Depew, quick to seize the advantage, stood over
+him.
+
+[Illustration: _"Depew was still crouched on the body of his victim."_]
+
+Every keeper connected with the show stood about the cage with the Roman
+candles, fire extinguishers, pistols and irons which are always kept in
+readiness, and any or all of them would have willingly entered to rescue
+the man, but experience has taught them that two cannot work together
+in a cage with animals. They were quick to act and a stream of water
+under heavy pressure from the fire hose struck the tiger in the side,
+exploding fireworks scorched his skin, the din of revolver shots was in
+his ears, while the wads from the cartridges stung him, but he seemed
+conscious only of the prostrate form beneath him. At last his chance had
+come; the trainer who for long months had made him do foolish things
+which were beneath the dignity of a royal tiger was in his power; the
+revolver which had so often checked him was emptied; the cruel training
+rod was powerless, for the hand which held it was pinned to the floor by
+a huge paw. Cat-like he paused to glory in his triumph, loath to give
+the _coup de grace_ which would put his victim beyond the reach of
+suffering, and he stood there growling, the bloody slaver from his jaws
+dripping on the upturned face of the prostrate man.
+
+Animal trainers need to think quickly and to seize the slightest moment
+of hesitation or indecision on the part of their pupils if they wish to
+be long-lived, and Miller, as he fell, had thrown his useless pistol out
+of the cage and uttered the one word "Load!" There was no time for that,
+but Tudor, seeing that the trainer had one arm free, threw his own
+pistol through the bars and it slid across the floor of the cage
+straight as a die to the outstretched hand. It was a time when fractions
+of a second count and Depew's hesitation robbed him of his revenge. The
+opened jaws were within a foot of the trainer's throat when the muzzle
+of the pistol went between them, and Depew, coughing and choking, drew
+back, his throat scorched by the burning powder, his eyes momentarily
+blinded by the stream from a fire extinguisher, while Miller struggled
+to his feet.
+
+"People who see the crowds at my show think that I must coin money,"
+said the Proprietor as he joined the Press Agent and the Stranger after
+the performance. "But that accident in the Arena to-night means a loss
+of fifty thousand dollars to me."
+
+"Isn't that a high figure, even if they all die?" asked the Stranger,
+who had been doing a little mental arithmetic.
+
+"For those eight, yes, although a trained tiger is worth all sorts of
+money, but I have purchased twenty-eight in all for that group, and the
+others have been killed one by one, fighting among themselves. They
+average over a thousand apiece, for I bought only the best, and figure
+up the cost of their keep, transportation and trainer's salaries for
+three years and you will find that I am not far out. That is the
+difficulty of the show business in America, the public demands so much.
+It is a marvelous thing, when you come to think of it, to see one
+educated tiger; but if he wore evening clothes and played the fiddle it
+wouldn't impress the Americans; they would demand a full orchestra. I
+can give an act an hour long in Paris with one high school horse, but
+here they want fifty liberty horses in a bunch and only care to watch
+them for ten minutes. I realized that from Bonavita's act with the
+lions; no individual lion did very much, but the fact that there were
+twenty-seven of them in the cage drew the crowds. That's what made me
+start in with the tigers, and I intended to get a big group, but now I
+am back where I started from. I don't believe a troupe of tigers can
+ever be trained."
+
+[Illustration: _"Depew, coughing and choking, drew back."_]
+
+"Hagenbeck has them," ventured the Stranger. "They seem as tame as
+kittens with his show."
+
+"That's just the point," answered the Proprietor. "They are as tame as
+kittens: undersized brutes which have been raised in captivity and
+which go through their act like domestic cats. That isn't what the
+public wants. A sensation--the realization that every animal in the cage
+is a wild animal and that he is liable to remember it at any minute--is
+what holds attention. That is why I always use jungle animals when I can
+get them, for, although they can be as well trained, they always perform
+under protest and it makes it exciting. But the losses from fighting
+among themselves make it mighty expensive to keep up the big groups
+which the American public demands."
+
+"That's one of the things which drove me out of the show business," said
+the Press Agent as he set his empty glass on the table and signaled to
+the waiter. "A guy named Merritt and myself had a snake show in New York
+a few years ago which presented the most complete collection of reptiles
+ever gotten together, for it contained specimens of every species of
+wriggler known to herpetology and a good many that were not described in
+the books. That man Merritt was an inventive genius and had the
+California sharp, Burbank, beaten a mile when it came to inventing new
+species. When business was dull he'd take a lot of common, ordinary
+snakes into the back room and with a bottle of peroxide of hydrogen and
+an assortment of aniline dyes he would bring out albinos and spotted and
+striped snakes which made the scientists open their eyes and kept 'em
+busy inventing new Latin names.
+
+"His biggest success was 'The Great Two-horned Rhinoceros Serpent,'
+which made 'em all sit up for a month, and if I hadn't seen Merritt
+working over a common boa-constrictor with a pair of shark's teeth and a
+dish of bird lime it would have fooled me. That snake was proud of the
+horns which Merritt glued on his head, too, and he used to chase the
+other snakes around the cage and butt 'em like a giddy billy-goat. But
+in spite of all his ingenuity in originating new varieties, business was
+dropping off, for the public demanded quantity as well as quality and we
+had skinned the local snake market clean. We were sitting in the office
+one day, figuring on where we could get additions to our collection,
+when a stout, red-faced little man who had 'sea captain' written all
+over him came in and asked if we wanted any more snakes. Merritt allowed
+that we did if the snakes and the prices were right and asked where we
+could inspect them.
+
+"'Well, I've got one that I brought from Borneo and he's on a ship down
+in the harbor,' says the Captain. 'We won't argue none about the price,
+for if you'll come down and take him away you can have him for nothing.'
+That made Merritt a little suspicious and he asked the Captain if it
+were his ship.
+
+"'I reckoned it was until two days ago, when that blame snake broke
+loose,' he answered irritably. 'Since then he seems to own it and not a
+man jack of the crew will go below. I've tried to shoot him, but the
+beggar's too quick, and I want to discharge my cargo, so if you ain't
+afraid to tackle him, come on.'
+
+"'Me afraid! Me?' says Merritt throwing out a chest. 'Why, man alive,
+I'm the only living snake charmer who ever dared handle the dangerous
+Two-horned Rhinoceros Serpent, and do you think I'd weaken before a
+common Borneo python?'
+
+"'I dunno whether you will or not until I see you try,' says the
+Captain. 'I've handled a Malay crew, which is worse than serpents, and
+I've mixed it up with most of the scum that sails the seven seas, but
+this blame snake's got me bluffed all right. He's three fathom long, as
+big around as the mainmast, and made up principally of muscle and
+wickedness.'
+
+"'Just watch me. Watch me!' says Merritt. 'I'll use my wonderful
+hypnotic power and you'll see the serpent crawl into the bag at my
+command, to be easily transported to this moral and elevating show for
+exhibition as an example of the power of mind over matter.'
+
+"'All right, professor,' says the Captain. 'But if you'll take my advice
+you'll stow those shore-going togs and get into working rig before you
+tackle him.' Merritt was arrayed in all his finery, and if you'd ever
+seen him you'd know that that meant a lot, for when he was flush he
+could make Solomon in all his glory, or any other swell dresser look
+like a dirty deuce in a new deck. He had on a light suit with checks
+which were so loud they drowned the music of the orchestra, and a shirt
+which would make a summer sunset hide its head in disappointment. Patent
+leather shoes with yellow tops and a white plug hat with a black band
+around it completed his costume, except for a few specimens of yellow
+diamonds which adorned his shirt front and cuffs.
+
+"Merritt snorted contemptuously at the suggestion and we started for the
+ship. When we got on board he made a little speech before he went into
+the hold, telling the sailors about his wonderful hypnotic power and how
+he would exercise it to charm the serpent which was preventing their
+worthy Captain from reaping the rewards of his arduous toil and his
+hardihood in having braved the perils of the vasty deep. The sailors
+listened and grinned, but the Captain was getting impatient and
+suggested that Merritt get the snake first and give his spiel afterward,
+so Merritt went down the ladder with the bag over his shoulder and we
+all rubbered down the hatchway to watch the capture.
+
+[Illustration: _"Merritt was quick enough to get a strangle hold around
+the snake's neck."_]
+
+"I knew what he would try to do, for I had seen him work it before. The
+way to get one of those big snakes is to cover his head with a bag, and
+then he'll crawl in himself to get into the dark, which is a serpent's
+idea of safety. The more you prod 'em the faster they'll crawl, and that
+was the time when Merritt always made passes with his hands and muttered
+gibberish to impress the spectators. He started in according to
+programme as soon as he located the snake, which was half hidden among a
+lot of casks. The snake carried out his part and struck at the opened
+bag which Merritt held out to him, but instead of sticking his head in
+he grabbed it with his teeth, and as Merritt held on he drew him back
+among the barrels and there was a pretty fight. Merritt was quick enough
+to get a strangle hold around the snake's neck and then it kept him
+busy keeping out of his coils. The Captain hadn't lied much about the
+size of the python--it was about thirty feet long--and Merritt didn't
+have time to use any incantation, although considerable forcible
+language floated up through the hatchway. They wiped the deck with each
+other for about twenty minutes, and Merritt had been bumped against
+pretty nearly every cask in the hold before he finally succeeded in
+drawing the sack over the snake's head. Then it was easy, and in spite
+of his lack of breath the showman in Merritt asserted itself. He put the
+sack on the floor, and with one foot on the neck of it he prodded the
+snake's body with the other while he made mysterious passes with his
+hands until the tip of the tail disappeared. When the sack was securely
+tied up the python was hoisted on deck, and Merritt, his clothing torn
+and soiled with pitch and the miscellaneous oily and sticky things which
+made up the ship's cargo, climbed up after it.
+
+"'Did you see me?' he asked proudly, throwing out his chest. 'Did you
+observe the wonderful hypnotic power which overcame the prowess of the
+serpent?'
+
+"'Yes, I noticed it, along toward the finish,' answered the Captain,
+grinning skeptically as he sized up Merritt's dilapidated apparel. 'But
+say, professor, what I can't understand is why you didn't get it working
+sooner.'"
+
+
+THE END
+
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+Transcriber's Note:
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+    Minor typographical errors have been corrected without note. Dialect
+    spellings have been retained.
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+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Side Show Studies, by Francis Metcalfe
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