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diff --git a/22974.txt b/22974.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..5a95fe6 --- /dev/null +++ b/22974.txt @@ -0,0 +1,4001 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The City Bride (1696), by Joseph Harris + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The City Bride (1696) + Or The Merry Cuckold + +Author: Joseph Harris + +Commentator: Vinton A. Dearing + +Release Date: October 12, 2007 [EBook #22974] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + + + + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + + + +The Augustan Reprint Society + +JOSEPH HARRIS + +_The City Bride_ + +(1696) + +With an Introduction by +Vinton A. Dearing + +Publication Number 36 + +Los Angeles +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library +University of California +1952 + + +GENERAL EDITORS + +H. RICHARD ARCHER, _Clark Memorial Library_ +RICHARD C. BOYS, _University of Michigan_ +ROBERT S. KINSMAN, _University of California, Los Angeles_ +JOHN LOFTIS, _University of California, Los Angeles_ + + +ASSISTANT EDITOR + +W. EARL BRITTON, _University of Michigan_ + + +ADVISORY EDITORS + +EMMETT L. AVERY, _State College of Washington_ +BENJAMIN BOYCE, _Duke University_ +LOUIS BREDVOLD, _University of Michigan_ +JAMES L. CLIFFORD, _Columbia University_ +ARTHUR FRIEDMAN, _University of Chicago_ +EDWARD NILES HOOKER, _University of California, Los Angeles_ +LOUIS A. LANDA, _Princeton University_ +SAMUEL H. MONK, _University of Minnesota_ +ERNEST MOSSNER, _University of Texas_ +JAMES SUTHERLAND, _University College, London_ +H. T. SWEDENBERG, JR., _University of California, Los Angeles_ + + +CORRESPONDING SECRETARY + +EDNA C. DAVIS, _Clark Memorial Library_ + + + + +INTRODUCTION + + +_The City Bride_, by Joseph Harris, is of special interest as the only +adaptation from the canon of John Webster to have come upon the stage in +the Restoration. Nahum Tate's _Injur'd Love: or, The Cruel Husband_ is +an adaptation of _The White Devil_, but it was never acted and was not +printed until 1707. _The City Bride_ is taken from _A Cure for a +Cuckold_, in which William Rowley and perhaps Thomas Heywood +collaborated with Webster. F. L. Lucas, Webster's most recent and most +scholarly editor, remarks that _A Cure for a Cuckold_ is one of the +better specimens of Post-Elizabethan romantic comedy. In particular, the +character of the bride, Annabel (Arabella in Harris's adaptation), has a +universal appeal. _The City Bride_, a very close copy of its original, +retains its virtues, and has some additional virtues of its own. + +Not much is known of its author, Joseph Harris. Genest first notices him +as playing Bourcher, the companion of a French pirate, in _A +Common-Wealth of Women_. Thomas Durfey's alteration of _The Sea Voyage_ +from the Beaumont and Fletcher folio, which was produced about September +1685. His subsequent roles were of a similar calibre, but if he never +rose to be a star he seems to have become a valued supporting player, +for in 1692 he was chosen to join the royal "comedians in ordinary." He +did not at first side with Thomas Betterton in his quarrel with the +patentees of the theatre in 1694-5, but he withdrew with him to +Lincoln's Inn Fields. Genest notices him for the last time as playing +Sir Richard Vernon in Betterton's adaptation of _1 Henry IV_, which was +produced about April 1700. + +During his career on the stage Harris found time to compose a +tragi-comedy, _The Mistakes, or, The False Report_ (1691), produced in +December 1690; _The City Bride_, produced in 1696; and a comedy and a +masque, _Love's a Lottery, and a Woman the Prize. With a New Masque, +call'd Love and Riches Reconcil'd_ (1699), produced about March 1698/9. +_The Mistakes_ is clearly apprentice work, for Harris acknowledges in a +preface the considerable help of William Mountfort, who took the part of +the villain, Ricardo. Mountfort, who had already written three plays +himself, cut one of the scenes intended for the fifth act and inserted +one of his own composition (probably the last) which not only clarified +the plot but also elevated the character of the part he was to play. The +company seems to have done its best by the budding dramatist, for Dryden +wrote the prologue, a rather unusual one in prose and verse, and Tate +supplied the epilogue. Harris professed himself satisfied with the +play's reception, but owned that it was Mountfort's acting which really +carried it off. + +_The City Bride_, on the other hand, shows its author completely +self-assured, and rightly so. No doubt some of his ease comes from the +fact that he had nothing to invent, but in large part it must derive +from his ten-years' experience on the stage. Harris added nothing to the +plot of _The City Bride_, although he commendably shifted its emphasis, +as his title makes clear, from infidelity to fidelity; but he rewrote +the dialogue almost completely, and the new dialogue is remarkable good. +The reader will notice that it is, except for the last half of the first +act, printed as prose. The quarto of _A Cure for a Cuckold_, from which +Harris worked, is also largely printed as prose, but has correct verse +lineation in the same portion of the first act. It is the more +remarkable that Harris, following thus closely the apparent form of his +original, could vary from it so successfully. Most notable, probably, +are the passages in which he intensified the expression of his source. +They may indicate no more than the eternal "ham" in our author; but I +think they probably indicate as well a new style of acting, more +rhetorical in one way, more natural in another. A good example, in which +the new rhetoric is not oppressive, is the account of the sea fight at +the end of Act III. Even when Harris followed his original most closely, +we seem to hear the actor, speaking in a new tongue, in a more relaxed +and colloquial rhythm. The reader will find it both amusing and +instructive to compare the two versions of Act II, scene ii. The new +cadences do more than merely prove that Harris had no ear for blank +verse. + +_The City Bride_ does not conform to the dominant type of Restoration +comedy, but it belongs to a thriving tradition. Domestic comedy, in +adaptations from the Elizabethans, had been staged at intervals for +twenty years before _The City Bride_ appeared, and the type was of +course destined to supplant gay comedy in the near future. Harris was +not, therefore, going against the taste of the town; on the contrary he +was regularly guided by contemporary taste and practice. His stage is +less crowded: he amalgamated the four gallants of _A Cure for a Cuckold_ +in the person of Mr. Spruce, at the expense of a dramatic scene (I, ii, +31-125); and he ended the sub-plot with the fourth act instead of +bringing its persons into the final scene, with some loss of liveliness +and a concomitant gain in unity of effect. He modernized his dialogue +entirely, bringing up to date the usage and allusions of his original, +and restraining the richness of its metaphor by removing the figures +altogether or by substituting others more familiar. He omitted a good +deal of bawdry, especially in Act II, scene ii. All these changes have +parallels in other Restoration adaptations. Again, the songs and dances, +which are all of Harris's composition, reflect the demand of the +Restoration audience for excitement, variety, novelty, in their dramatic +fare. When in Act III, scene i, Harris meets this demand by making +Bonvile bare his breast to Friendly's sword, and Friendly a little later +grovel at Bonvile's feet for pardon, we may condemn the new business as +bathetic; but when in Act IV, scene i, he substitutes for Webster's +emaciated jokes the bustle of drawers, the sound of the bar bell, and +healths all around, we can only applaud the change. + +We must also commend Harris for supplying a consistent and relatively +believable motivation for the main action. In both _A Cure for a +Cuckold_ and _The City Bride_, Clare (Clara) begins the action by giving +her suitor, Lessingham (Friendly), a cryptic message: he is to determine +who his best friend is and kill him. In _A Cure for a Cuckold_, it is +never made clear whether the victim should have been Bonvile or Clare +herself (she apparently intended to trick Lessingham into poisoning +her). This uncertainty has only recently been noticed by students of the +drama, who have been forced to emend the text at IV, ii, 165 (see +Lucas's note on the passage). Harris's solution is simpler. He will have +nothing to do with either murder or suicide. Clara explains to Friendly +that the best friend of a lover is love itself. + +This is not the place to enumerate all the differences between _A Cure +for a Cuckold_ and _The City Bride_; indeed the reader may prefer making +the comparisons for himself. Harris's alterations follow the general +pattern of Restoration adaptations from the earlier drama, it is true. +On the other hand, a relatively small number of such plays allow us to +see the professional actor feeling his way through the emotions and +actions of the scenes. To compare a play like _The City Bride_ with its +source is like visiting the rehearsals of an acting company of the time. +Such a play has an immediacy and liveness that strongly appeals to those +who delight to image forth the past. + +_The City Bride_ has never been reprinted. The present edition +reproduces, with permission, the copy in the Henry E. Huntington +Library, omitting Harris's signed dedication to Sir John Walter, Bart., +on A2^r-A3^r (A1^v in the original is blank). The top line on page 44, +which is partly cut away, reads: _Cla._ Who (if thou ever lov'dst me ... + +Vinton A. Dearing +University of California +Los Angeles + + + + +THE CITY BRIDE: + +OR, + +The Merry Cuckold. + +A COMEDY, + +Acted at the New Theatre, in _Little +Lincolns Inn-Fields._ + +BY + +His Majesty's Servants. + +_First Edition._ + +_Spero Meliora._ + +LONDON: + +Printed for _A. Roper_ and _E. Wilkinson_ at the _Black-Boy_, and R. +_Clavel_ at the _Peacock_, in _Fleet-street_. 1696. + + + + +PROLOGUE: + +_Spoke by Mr._ THURMOND. + + + _Three Ways there are, and all accounted fair, + To gain your Favour: Begging, Borrowing, Prayer. + If as a Beggar, I your Alms implore } + Methinks your Charity shou'd aid the Poor; } + Besides, I never beg'd of you before. } + If I address by Prayer, and loud Complaints + I then oblige yee, for I make you Saints; + And sure none here can think it Superstition, + To pray to Saints that are of no Religion! + If Invocation will not do my Work, + A Man may borrow of a_ Jew _or_ Turk; + _Pray lend me Gentlemen your Applause and Praise, + I'll take it for as good as Currant Bays; + And if I ne're repay it, 'tis no more, + Than many of you Sparks have done before: + With this distinction, that you ran indebt + For want of Money, we for want of Wit. + In vain I plead! a Man as soon may get + Mill'd Silver, as one favour from the Pit. + ----Hold then----now I think on't, + I'll e'en turn Thief, and steal your kind Affection, + And when I've got your Hearts, claim your protection: + You can't convict me sure for such a crime, + Since neither Mare nor Lap-dog, I purloin: + While you Rob Ladies Bosoms every day, } + And filch their pretious Maiden-heads away; } + I'll plead good nature for this Brat the Play: } + A Play that plagues no more the thread-bare Theme + Of powder'd Beaux, or tricks o'th' Godly Dame, + But in your humours let's ye all alone, + And not so much as Fools themselves runs down. + Our Author try'd his best, and Wisemen tell, + 'Tis half well doing to endeavour well: + What tho' his poor Allay runs not so fine; + Yet, let it pass as does our present Coin; + For wanting fairer Ore, and riches mould + He stamps in Brass, what others print in Gold: + Smile on him but this time, the next perhaps, + If he guess right he may deserve your Claps._ + + + + +Dramatis Personae. + + + |Bonvile, _The Bridegroom_. |_Mr._ Boman. | + |Friendly, _His Friend, in Love with_ Clara. |_Mr._ Thurmond. | + |Justice Merryman, _Father to_ Arabella. |_Mr._ Bright. | + |Summerfield, _A Gentleman, but Younger Brother, | | + | necessitated to take the High-Way_. |_Mr._ Scudemore.| + |_Mr._ Ventre, _A Merchant._ |_Mr._ Arnold. | + |_Mr._ Spruce, _A City Beau._ |_Mr._ Bayly. | + |Compasse, _A Master of a Vessel._ |_Mr._ Freeman. | + |A Councellor. |_Mr._ Davis. | + |Pettifog, } |_Mr._ Trefusis. | + | } _Two Attorneys._ | | + |Dodge, } |_Mr._ Eldred. | + | | | + |_Sailers, Neighbours, Drawers, Servants, Boys, | | + | Singers and Dancers._ | | + | | | + |Arabella, _The Bride_. |_Mrs._ Boman. | + |Clara, _Friendly's Mistriss, but secretly in Love | | + | with_ Bonvile. |_Mrs._ Boutell. | + |_Mrs._ Ventre, _The Merchant's Wife_. |_Mrs._ Lacy. | + |Peg, _Compasses Wife_. |_Mrs._ Perin. | + |Nurse. |_Mrs._ Lawson. | + |Lucy, Clara's _Maid_. |_Miss_ Prince. | + | | | + |_Women Neighbours._ | | + + +SCENE _London_. + + + + +THE CITY BRIDE: +OR, THE +Merry Cuckold. + + + + +ACT I. SCENE the I. + + _The Curtain draws up, and discovers several sitting at a Banquet. + An Entertainment of Instrumental Musick, Compos'd by Signior_ + Finger: _Then a Song, set by Mr._ John Eccles, _and Sung by Young_ + La Roche. + +SONG. + + _Many I've lik'd, and some Enjoy'd, + But if I said I Lov'd, I ly'd. + Inconstant as the wandring Bee, + From once touch'd Sweets I us'd to flee; + Nor all the Power of Female Skill, + Cou'd curb the freedom of my Will:_ + Clarinda _only found the Art, + To Conquer and so keep my Heart._ + +[_After this a Dance, and then the Scene shuts._ + +Enter_ Friendly _and_ Clara. + +_Friend._ This is a Day of Mirth and Jollity my _Clara_. + +_Clara._ 'Tis so, for such as can be merry, Mr. _Friendly_. + +_Friend._ Why not for us my Love, we have a Noble President, and +methinks shou'd Imitate (thro Envy) this their happiness. + +_Clara._ I am not of your Opinion. + +_Friend._ Why not my Fair? + +_Clara._ I'll tell you, because I purpose not to Marry. + +_Fri._ Prithee be serious, and reform that Thought: Think of my past +Service, and judge by that my future; weigh all the respect I have paid +you long, and ever lov'd you beyond my self. + +_Cla._ I know your Weakness, and will reward it too. + +_Fri._ I am sure you will, you must be kind; And can you think an Answer +of this killing Nature, a just return for all my faithful Love? + +_Cla._ As to that I have already said. + +_Fri._ Oh speak, from whence this Coldness doth arise! Be at least so +kind as to tell me that; Is it some late Disgust you have conceived of +my Person; or rather your desire, (I fear) of some unworthier, happy +Creature, base in the Attempt, as you unkind in thinking of a Change; if +neither. + + _I must impute it to your Woman's Will, + Still pleased with what it fancies, Good or Ill._ + +_Cla._ Be't what it will, thus it is, and with this Answer pray rest +satisfied; there is but one way ever to win me and draw me unto +Marriage, which whosoever finds, 'tis like he may have me, if not, I am +still my own. + +_Fri._ Oh name it then! Thou dearest Treasure of my Life! my Soul! my +All! I am in a maze of Extasie, to think there's any means to gain you, +and hope you'l be so kind to tell me how I may be happy. + +_Cla._ I'll retire a while; and with my self resolve what must be done, +and in the end send you my Resolution. + +[_Exit_ Clara. + +_Fri._ I'll here expect it: What more can I desire, than now be +satisfied and know my Dooom. + + _Suspence is the worst Torment we endure, + 'Tis Knowledge make the Wound both safe and sure._ + +_Enter_ Spruce _and_ _Mr._ Venter. + +_Spru._ How now _Jack_! What all alone Man? + +_Fri._ No, for I have heard some say, Men are ne're less alone, then +when alone. The reason I suppose is this, because they have Crowds of +Thoughts, that still perplex the Mind; which wou'd be, like the Soul +retired and free, thereby to enjoy that sweet repose, which nought but +that can Grant. + +_Spru._ Pshaw! Pox of this Morality and dull Stuff; Prithee let us be +Merry, and Entertain the Bride and Bridegroom. Ods fish there a parcel +of rare Creatures within! But of all Mrs. _Clara_ for my Money. + +_Mr. Ven._ And truly, I am of your Opinion Mr. _Spruce_; for setting +aside her present Melancholly and Discontent, I think she is beyond +Comparison with any other. + +_Spr._ Od's nigs, I know the Cause of her Disorder. + +_Ven._ What I pray? + +_Spr._ Why, I'll tell ye; In all Conditions of Estates, Professions, and +Degrees, in Arts or Sciences, yee know there's a kind of Envious +Emulation. + +_Mr. Ven._ Right. + +_Spr._ So in this of _Arabella_'s Marrying; for _Clara_ being Lady of +much the same Birth and Quality, Grieves I--suppose to see her Rival get +the start of her. + +_Mr. Ven._ Troth like enough. + +_Fri._ Y'are Pleasant Gentlemen--Or else because she having had so many +Courtiers---- + +_Spr._ And you among the rest _Jack_. + +_Fri._ She now perhaps does cast a more favourable Eye upon some one +that does not like her. + +_Spr._ Why Faith, and that may be too. + +_Enter_ Lucy _with a Letter._ + +_Lucy._ Sir, my Mistriss presents her humble Service to you, and has +sent you this Letter; pray Heaven it be to your liking Sir. + +_Fri._ I thank the kind _Lucy_: There, there's for the Postage Girle: +[_Gives her Money._] She has kept her Promise for once I see; I'm +resolved to read it, tho I were sure my Death was Comprehended in it. + + Reads. _Try all your Friends, and find out the best and nearest to + your Heart, That done, be sure to kill him for my sake. This fail + not to do, if you respect and Love (as you pretend.)_ + + Clara. + +'Tis as I fear'd, and what I know she most desires: Mischief, and +Murder, are all her Sexes Practice, and Delight? Yet such is the +Extravagancy of my Passion, I must obey the Mandate, tho to my certain +Ruine: 'Tis strangely difficult, and does require Mature Deliberation. + +[_Exit._ + +_Spr._ What has _Friendly_ left us? + +_Mr. Ven._ I believe the Letter was the occasion, it may be it was a +Challenge. + +_Spr._ A Challenge! No, no; Women don't use to bring Challenges, I +rather believe 'tis an Amour; And that Letter as you call it a _Billet +Deux_, which is to Conduct him to the place appointed; and in some Sence +you may take that for a Challenge. + +_Mr. Ven._ And she the Civil Embassadress to usher him in. + +_Spr._ Yes, yes, but see the Bride and Bridegroom, with the rest of the +good Company. + +_Enter Justice_ Merry-man, Bonvile, Arabella, _Mrs._ Venter _and others, +as Guests Invited to the Wedding._ + +_Mer._ Son _Bonvile_, what call ye the Gentleman we met at the Garden +Door? + +_Bon._ _Friendly_ Sir, a most approv'd and worthy Gentleman, and one of +my chiefest Guests. + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, it may be so: But yet me thought he seemed somewhat +displeased, tho Son, Hah, What think you? + +_Bon._ No sure Sir, he cannot be Angry, when his Friend's so happy. + +_Mer._ I can't tell Boy, but I believe there's something more than +ordinary in the matter. Why should he leave the Company else? And Mrs. +_Clara_ I miss her too. Why Gentlemen, why do you suffer this? + +_Ara._ Unknown to any Sir, she withdrew soon as we rise from Table. + +_Mer._ Sick of the Maid perhaps; because she sees you Mrs. Bride her +Quondam Play fellow Married before her; Heh Gentlemen, heh! + +_Mr. Ven._ 'Troth like enough Brother _Merry-man_. + +_Mer._ Go, go, find her out for shame Gentlemen; and do not stand idle +thus, Od's bobs, when I was a Young fellow and invited to a Wedding, I +used to frisk and Jump, and so bestir my self, that I made all the +_Green-sickness_ Girles in the Room blush like Rubies. Ah, hah! I was a +brisk Fellow in those Days, I'faith, and used to Cut Capers a Yard high: +Nor am I yet so Old, but I can take a round or two still--Come, come +Gentlemen, lets in again and firk it away, shall we not? + +_Spr._ With all my Heart Mr. Justice. + +_Mer._ Why that's well said Mr. _Spruce_, Ods bobs it was, and I thank +you heartily. + +_Spr._ Come Madam, you must along with us, without you all's nothing. + +_Arab._ I'll wait on you Gentlemen; if you will give me leave Sir. +[_To_ Bonvile. + +_Bon._ Oh my best Joy! This Day you may Command. + +_Mer._ That's right, that's right I'faith Gentlemen! This Day she +Commands, and he for ever after. Ods bobs I have done so my self, and +hope I shall do so still. Sister _Venter_, May I presume to ask if my +Brother can say as much? + +[_Exit_ Bonvile, Arab. Spruce, _and the rest of the Guests._] + +_Mrs. Vent._ Yes Brother, I think he may, I freely Give him leave. + +_Mer._ Observe that Brother, she freely gives you leave: But who Gives +leave the Master or the Servant? + +_Mr. Ven._ You are Merry Brother, and truly you have reason, having but +one Daughter and see her Married as you would have her. + +_Mer._ Yes, I have one thank Heaven! You wou'd be glad Sister you cou'd +say so, but your Barrenness does give your Husband leave (if he please) +to look for Game elsewhere. + +_Mrs. Ven._ Well, well Sir, tho you jeer me, and make a scorn of my +Sterility-- + +_Mer._ No, no, not I Sister, I scorn not your Sterility, nor your +Husbands Virility neither. + +_Mrs. Ven._ My Husband's Virility! Pray spare my Husband; for he has not +been so idle as you imagin; He may have an--Offspring abroad for ought +you know, that you never heard of. + +_Mr. Ven._ Oh fye Wife, You will not make it publick will you? + +_Mrs. Ven._ And yet he keeps himself within compass for all that. + +_Mr. Ven._ If you love me _Winny_-- + +_Mrs. Ven._ Na, I say no more, but thereby hangs a Tale. + +_Mer._ Say'st thou so old Girle? What and has he been stragling then? +Nay; nay I know he is a Ventersome Man; And a--Merchant of small Wares +sometimes, especially when he can get a good Commodity: I love him the +better for't I'faith, Ods bobs I do--A notable spark with a Young Wench +in a corner, Is he not? A true Chip of the old block, his Father I +warrant him--But Sister, I have something to say to you in private, +concerning my Daughter. + +_Enter Nurse._ + +_Nurse._ By your leave Good Folks, Is Master _Venter_ the Merchant here +I pray? + +_Mr. Ven._ Oh Nurse! I am glad to see thee, How does my Boy? + +_Nurse._ Very well, I thank Heaven Sir! He grows bravely I assure you. +'Tis a Chopping lad I promise you, and as like your good Worship; As if +he had been spit out of your Mouth. + +_Mr. Ven._ Softly, Nurse softly. + +_Nurse._ I protest 'tis one of the forward'st Infants in the Universe; +Lord! how it will Crow, and Chirup like a Sparrow! I am afraid Sir he is +about Teeth, for he Dribbles extreamly, if so, Your Worship must provide +him a Silver Corral with a Whistle and Chain. + +_Mr. Ven._ Well, well, he shall have everything Nurse, my Wife shall +send them to ye; in the mean time, there, there's a Piece, to buy thee a +Pair of Gloves, and so leave us, for I am busie at present, therefore +steal away behind me, and slip out at the back Door. + +_Nurse._ Yes Sir, I am gone, Heavens bless your Worship, a Piece! Marry! +and that's a sufficient Charm to lye up any Nurses Tongue in +_Christendom_. + +[_Ex. Nurse_ + +_Just. Mer._ Well well, it shall be done: Come Brother we are mist I +warrant you amongst the Young Fry, let's to 'um and, Dance till our Legs +ake again, come I'll lead the way. + +_Mr. Ven._ We follow you. + +[_Exeunt._ + +_Enter_ Friendly _Reading the Letter._ + +_Fr._ Heaven in its excess of Goodness, bestow'd no greater Blessing on +Mankind than that of Friendship--To Murder any one is a Crime +unpardonable! _But a Friend!--And of all Friends the nearest to my +Heart_,--'Tis such an Imposition that Hell it self 'till now cou'd never +parallel; And yet this Devil of a Woman has power over me beyond all +Virtue. I am distracted in my Thoughts, and know not what to do; yet +something must be done without delay, or else I lose her quite: And yet +I fear 'tis most Impossible, for Friendship left the World, when Justice +fled, and all who now do wear that Name are the worst of Hypocrites, + + _Like Counterfeited Coin on which is seen, + The formal Stamp; but sordid Dross within._ + +_Enter_ Bonivile. + + _Bon._ My Friend alone and Thoughtful? say for what? + That you alone appear with Discontent, + When all my Friends Congratulate my Bliss? + Is it because (which I durst ne're suspect) + Your Love to me was not intirely true? + Or else perhaps, this Crown of Happiness + You think Misplac'd, and Envy it not yours. + + _Fri._ Forbear such cruel Words-- + How can you entertain a Thought so Vile + Of him whom so long you have call'd your Friend? + May all the Blesings Heaven can bestow + On us poor Mortals in this World below, + Crown all your Days, and may you nothing see + But flowing Tides of sweet Felicity; + But I, alas!-- + + _Bon._ Alas! What means my _Friendly_? + Much hidden Grief that wretched Word portends, + Which thus disturbs the Quiet of my Friend? + But come disclose it to me, + And since the Burthen is too much for one, + I'll bear a part to ease thy troubled Breast. + + _Fri._ Oh _Bonvile_! + Seek not to force this Fatal secret from me-- + + _Bon._ I must know it, by my best hopes I must. + + _Fri._ Oh no! I cannot, Nay I dare not-- + + _Bon._ How dare not trust a secret to a Friend? + + _Fri._ Oh _Bonville_, _Bonville_! Call me not your Friend, + That Name strikes horrour to my very Soul. + + _Bon._ Ha! Art thou then a Stranger to that Name? + + _Fri._ Indeed I am, and must be so for ever now. + + _Bon._ Yet hear me _Friendly_; Deny me if thou can'st, + Fixt as a Rock, I vow I'll here remain, + Until I have forc'd this Dire secret from thee. + + _Fri._ Pardon me Sir, I hope you soon will hear it, + But I---- + + [_Offers to go._] + + _Bon._ Yet stay, and since intreaty can't prevail, + By all the Friendship which you once profess'd, + By all that's Holy, both in Heaven and Earth, + I now Conjure thee to impart it to me, + Or by this Life---- + + _Fri._ Hold, hold, and since I can no longer hide it + Know 'tis my Honour then which lyes at Stake. + + _Bon._ Thy Honour! How? Proceed. + + _Fri._ By chance a Quarrel happen'd to arise + Betwixt another and my self, The Field, + Time, Place, and all appointed, + Nay Seconds must assist us in the Deed: + I have relied on many seeming Friends, + (Such as profess the bare and empty Name) + And all refuse to venture in my Cause. + + _Bon._ Is this all? + + _Fri_ All, Is it not enough? To see my Reputation, + (the Lifes Blood of my Soul) + Nay all that's Dear, in Danger to be lost. + + _Bon._ Not while thy _Bonvile_ lives and wears a Sword: + May all things frown that I wou'd have to smile, + May I live Poor, and Dye despised by all, + If I out live the ruine of thy Honour! + Tell me the time my Friend? + + _Fri._ Oh, spare me that, for, if once known the time, + You'l Cancel this your promise, and recall + Your Friendly proffer. + + _Bon._ Away with these Excuses, come the time. + + _Fri._ At Seven this Evening. + + _Bon._ The place? + + _Fri._ _Barn-Elms_: + Oh the fatal place! Where I too well foresee, + The certain fall and Ruine of my Honour! + + _Bon._ No, Thou shalt not stay to forfeit thy lov'd Honour, + Come I'm ready to assist my Friend; and will along with you. + + _Fri._ Alas. What mean you? + Of all my Friends on you I ne're Relied; + But sure I Dream, I Rave, by Heav'ns I'm Mad! + My _Bonvile_ leave his Wife? And on his Wedding Day? + His Bride whom he perhaps may ne're Enjoy? + And all for me? O most unhappy Man! + + _Bon._ Pleasure before my Friend I'll ne're prefer, + Nor is it lost, tho for a while, delay'd. + + _Fri._ Are you then resolv'd to go? + + _Bon._ I am as fixt in my Resolve as is the _Libertin_ in vice, + Which Death alone can part. + + _Fri._ Yet stay, and think what it is you undertake, + Recall this Rash and suddain Resolution, + Least you repent, alas when it is too late. + + _Bon._ This were enough to shake a weaker Soul, + But mine it moves not; like to a Mighty Oake, + I'm plac'd above the Storms of Fear or Doubt. + +_Enter_ Arabella. + + _Fri._ Sir, no more, the Bride, + + _Ara._ Oh, Heavens defend me! + + _Bon._ What ailes my Dearest Life? + + _Ara._ I've lost the Key of this Chain I wear about my Neck + And of these Bracelets, Oh! Unhappy Omen! + +_Bon._ No, no, my Love; I found it as it lay at Random in your Chamber, +and fearing it might be forgot, or lost, have laid it by; 'Tis safe my +Love. + +_Ara._ Indeed I'me very glad you've found it, but yet---- + +[sighs. + +_Bon._ Yet, What my Dear? from whence proceeds that sigh? + + _Ara._ Alas, I know not! + Some busie Genius Whispers to my Soul, + The loss of this upon my Wedding Day + Portend's a greater e're the Day be past. + + _Bon._ Banish such Fears, let's in and see our Friends. + + _Ara._ Indeed they all expect you; come I'll lead the way. + + _Bon._ I'll go with you. _Barn-Elms_ you say? + + [_Aside to_ Friendly. + + _Fri._ Yes that's the place, at Seven precisely; + + _Bon._ I'll meet you on the _Exchange_, and go together; + If you are there before me, Take a turn or two. + + [_Exit_ Bonvile, _and_ Arabella. + + _Fri._ Oh my Dear _Bonvile_! Art thou then the Man? + The only, only Man that I can call Friend, + And only Friend that I am bound to Kill? + A Friend, that for my sake wou'd stake his Life, + Leave a Chast Bride and untouch'd Nuptial Bed + For me base Man, nay worse than Savage Beast: + The generous Lyon, never kills his kind + They say, altho provoked to utmost rage; + Yet I vile Monster, more ungrateful Man, + Thus unprovoked, must kill my Brother Creature, + And which is worse, my Dear and only Friend! + All for the pleasure of a Foolish Woman. + + _O cruel Woman thus to Command + A Task so hard, Yet what I can't withstand! + Oh! thou rare Copy of the Original, + By which free Man at first received his fall; + For she not only wou'd her self undo, + And all her Sex, but Damn all Mankind too._ + + [_Exit._ + +_The End of the First Act._ + + + + +ACT the Second. + + +SCENE the First. + +_The Fields._ + + +_Enter_ Summerfield _solus._ + +_Sum._ A Younger Brother! 'Tis a poor Title, and very hard to bear with: +The Elder Fool inherits all the Land, whilst we are forc'd to follow +_Legacies of Wit, and get 'um when we can_. Why shou'd the Law, by which +we are deprived of equal Portion with the First-begotten, not bind our +Fathers to cease from Procreation, and so as well deprive us of a +wretched Being, as of the Thing we cannot be without: No, no, our +Mothers ne're will consent to that, they love to groan and squall, tho +at the same time the Gallows eccho's to their Groans, and both together +labour for us. From the first we travel forth--to'thers our Journey's +End. _All this I know, yet I must forward_: To beg, my Birth will ne're +consent to; and _borrowing is quite out of date_--Yet starve I cannot, +_nor murder I wou'd not_: It must be the Highway then, the old Trade we +poor honest Rogues are forc'd too--This Place will serve for a Beginner +well enough--A Beginner did I say? Yes; for this is the very first day I +open Shop--Fortune, they say, uses to help the Bold, I hope she will be +kind to me. Ha! who have we here? A Gentlewoman well rigg'd, and only a +Servant with her, She may be a Prize worth the boarding, and faith I'll +venture hard but I'll carry her. + +[_He retires to a corner of the Stage._ + +_Enter_ Arabella _in great disorder, looking about her, with_ Symon _her +Servant._ + +_Arab._ This way, say'st thou _Symon_, with _Friendly_? + +_Sym._ Yes forsooth Mistress, with Mr. _Friendly_. + +_Arab._ Alas! I'm tired and cannot travel further; my Heart is full of +Fear, and yet I know not why, nor can I tell why he should use me +thus,--It is not common sure for Men to leave their Brides upon the +Wedding-day: And yet I cannot tell but it may be so! O wretched State of +Marriage, and of Love, if this be Love! Here will I lie me down, and +rest a while [_Lies down._] my wearied Limbs, unused to these sad +Frights and Fears--But prethee do thou run after him, and if it be +possible o'retake him too: Tell him the strange Disorder thou dost leave +me in; and let him know my Father's Anger, his Friends Concern, and what +is more, his _Arabella_'s sad Complaint; tell him, I grieve, I faint, I +die; tell him any thing that may stay him. + +_Sym._ Yes Forsooth. + +_Arab._ Intreat him to return; nay, urge him all thou canst to make him +come again: Nay haste, good _Symon_, fly if thou canst, for I can stir +no further. + +_Sym._ Well, well, Forsooth, I am gone. + +[_Exit_ Symon. + +_Arab._ Alas, how wretched and forlorn am I! + + _I she whom once so many did admire, + Whose Wit and Charms the coldest Hearts cou'd fire! + Now wretched Maid, and most unhappy Wife, + In Sighs and in Complaints must end my Life. + Abandoned by my Husband, e're enjoyed, + With thoughts of Pleasure, yet untasted, cloy'd. + He leaves me now to my sad Frights a Prey; + O, my dear_ Bonvile! _whither dost thou stray? + Unheard, alas! I make my amarous Moans; + The Winds and Waves refuse to bear my Groans: + Eccho her self can't suffer my Complaint, + But with repeated Sighs grows tir'd and faint. + Where to find him, good Heaven direct me! + For losing him, I more than lose my self._ + +[_Rises, and_ Exit. + +_Sum._ I must after her, she's worth my Acquaintance, and has good +Moveables about her I perceive, what e're the Ready is. The next Turning +has a most convenient Hollow for the Purpose, and there I'll make her +sure. Now Luck, or never. + +[_Exit after_ Arabella. + +_Reenter_ Arabella, _and_ Summerfield _after her._ + +_Ara._ I'm at a stand already, and know not where I am. + +_Sum._ I'll direct you, Madam; Well overtaken. + +_Ara._ Bless me, Sir; What are you? + +_Sum._ A Man. + +_Ara._ An honest Man, I hope? + +_Sum._ Yes faith in some Respects, I'm very honest, but not altogether +so; I were not fit to live in the World if I were too honest, Child. + +_Ara._ Alas! then I begin to fear: Pray tell me what you are? + +_Sum._ Why, faith, an honest Thief. + +_Ara._ How, honest, and yet a Thief? I never heard they were of Kin +before; Pray, Heaven, I find it now. + +_Sum._ Indeed! a very honest Thief. + +_Ara._ Well, Sir, since that's your Title, pray use me kindly: Nay, I'm +sure you will, there's something in your Looks which speaks you mild and +noble. + +_Sum._ Yes, I am a Gentleman, and you shall find me so; for I'll not +offer you the least shew of Violence, or offer to corrupt your Chastity; +tho indeed you are tempting Fair, and might inflame a colder Heart than +mine: Yet Ravishing's no part of my Profession as yet; or if it were, +you look so charming Innocent, you wou'd disarm my wildest Thoughts. + +_Ara._ Blessings on your Goodness! + +_Sum._ Are you a Maid, or Wife? + +_Ara._ I am both, Sir. + +_Sum._ Then this it seems is your Wedding-day, and these the Hours of +Interim that keep you in that double State? + +_Ara._ Indeed you are in the right. + +_Sum._ Come then, I'll be brief, and hinder not your desired _Hymen_. +You have some superfluous Toys I see about you, which you must deliver; +I mean, that Chain of Gold and Pearl about your Neck, and those pretty +Bracelets about your Arms, (pray, Heaven, they prove not Emblems of the +combined Hemp which is to halter mine); come, Madam, pray deliver 'em. + +_Ara._ Nay, I intreat you, Sir, to take 'em, for I cannot give 'em, they +are lock'd you see, and truly I have not the Key about me; it may be you +are furnish'd with Instruments that may unloose 'em, I pray do. + +_Sum._ No faith, Madam, I'm but a Beginner in this same Business, and am +wholly unprovided of any Pick-lock Tools besides this Sword. + +[_Draws his Sword._ + +_Ara._ O, good Sir, do not shew me that, 'tis too frightful; pray hurt +me not, for I do yield them freely: Use your Hands, perhaps their +strength will serve to tear 'em from me without more ado. Some Pain I'll +quietly endure, provide you do not hurt me much. + +_Sum._ Alas, dear Lady, I'll use you as gently as I can upon my Word; +but 'tis devilish strong.--If I hurt you, pray speak. + +[_He endeavours to break the Chain about her Neck._] + +_Ara._ Not much, Sir. + +_Sum._ I am glad on't,--S'death, I can't do it. + +[_She draws his Sword, and stands upon her Guard._ + +_Ara._ No Sir, nor shall not now: You a Highway-man and guard your self +no better: Come, Sir, what Money have you? Deliver quickly. + +_Sum._ Not a Cross by this foolish Hand of mine! + +_Ara._ How, no Money, 'twere pity then to take this from thee; Here, +take it again, I know you'l use me ne're the worse for what I have done. + +[_Gives him his Sword again._] + +_Sum._ No, by my Life! + +_Ara._ I do believe you; and now pray hear me--Here on my Knees, in +sight of Heaven, I make this solemn Protestation, That if you'l but +forbear the Rifling of this Chain and Bracelets, and go but with me +Home, by all the Vows which I this Day have plighted to my dearest +Husband, I will deliver you in Money the full Value of these I wear, +and cannot for my Life get off. + +_Sum._ Ha! Ready-money is the Prize I look for; it passes without +suspicion every where, when Chains and Jewels are often stop'd and +call'd for before the Magistrate: But---- + +_Ara._ Nay never doubt! You saw I gave you my Advantage up, and +questioned not my safety at your hands, pray fear not yours in mine. + +_Sum._ I know not what to do. + +_Ara._ Pray tell me, Sir, did you ever think a Woman true? + +_Sum._ I have heard of some, but very few. + +_Ara._ Will you add one more to your belief? + +_Sum._ I think I may, for they were fewer than the Articles of my Faith, +therefore I have room for you, and will believe you--Yet stay, you say +you'l ransom your jewels with Ready-money when you come Home; so you +may, and then discover me. + +_Ara._ Shall I repeat the Vows I made? + +_Sum._ No, for I'll trust you; and if you do betray me, then Mercy upon +me, and Farewel. I knew a Gentleman that had been a Courtier at +_Whitehall_ fifteen Years, and he was buried e're he took a Bride: 'Tis +very strange you'l say; and may be my Case in another way. + +_Ara._ Come, Sir, never fear: A Man and afraid; Fie, fie! + +_Sum._ Give me your Hand, I'll wait on you; and if you are (as I believe +you) True and Just, you are the World's Wonder! Come, Madam. + +[_Exeunt._ + + +SCENE II. + +_Enter two Boys, one with a Child in his Arms._ Compass _on the other +side._ + +_1 Boy._ _Jack_, Who's this? + +_2 Boy._ O _Jeminy_! I'll be hang'd if it ben't Goodman _Compass_, that +they said was dead three Years ago. + +_1 Boy._ Od's Life, and so it is! + +_Comp._ O _London_! sweet _London_! Do I live to see thee once again? My +Eyes are full of Brine for Joy. And if my dear _Peggy_ be but living +still, I shall cry 'em out. + +_1 Boy._ Goodman _Compass_, I am glad to see you; You are welcome home. + +_Comp._ Thank you, good Lad: Honest _Jack_ here too? Why, thou art grown +a little Man since I saw thee last: What, is that thy own, heh? + +_2 Boy._ I am fain to keep it, you see, whoever got it; it may be other +Mens Cases as well as mine. + +_Comp._ Thou say'st true _Jack_: But whose pretty Knave is it? + +_2 Boy._ My Dame's where I live. + +_Comp._ And not thy Master's? + +_2 Boy._ Nay, nay, I can't tell that neither: My Master loves it as well +as if it were his own, and for ought I see better than my Dame. + +_Comp._ A very good Lad by my Troth! + +_2 Boy._ But, Goodman _Compass_, I can tell you News, Your Wife has a +brave Boy too of her own, not above a Quarter old, as big as two of +this. + +_Comp._ Ha! say'st thou so, _Jack_? Ha, ha, ha, by my Troth I am +heartily glad to hear it: I'll give thee a dozen of Ale, and thy News be +true, Boy. + +_1 Boy._ I assure you 'tis very true: All your Neighbours can tell you +the same. + +_Comp._ Ha, ha, ha! But a Quarter old, and so lusty, say you? What +plaguy thundering Boys are got now-a-days: I Gad, I shall split my Sides +with Laughing; Ha, ha, ha.--But _Jack_, I have been loth to ask thee all +this while, for fear of ill News, how does my Wife? + +_2 Boy._ O never better, nor ever so lusty and handsome--And truly she +wears better Clothes than she was wont, especially on Holy-days: she has +Silk-Gowns, and Lac'd-Petticoats, and fine _Holland_-Smocks too, they +say, that have seen 'em: And some of our Neighbours say, they were taken +up in _Cheap_. + +_Comp._ Like enough, _Jack_; and there they must be paid for--Well, good +Lads, go and tell my Wife the joyful Tidings of my Return. + +_2 Boy._ That I will with all my Heart, for she heard you were dead long +ago. + +_1 Boy._ Nay, I'll go along with you _Jack_. + +_2 Boy._ Come then. + +[_Exeunt 2 Boys._ + +_Comp._ Well, _Peggy_, if I am one of the Livery, I thank thee for it: +The Cuckolds are the greatest Company in all the City: And we have more +Aldermen among us, than all the other put them together. + +_Enter_ Peg, Compass_'s Wife._ + +_Peg._ O my dear sweet Honey-suckle! Art thou alive? I am glad to see +thee with all my Heart and Soul, so I am. + +[_Runs and kisses him._] + +_Comp._ O, ho! good Spouse, give me leave to shed a few pearly Tears; +the Fountain of Love will have its Course: And tho I cannot Sing at +first sight, yet I can Cry you see. I am as it were new come into the +World; and Children Cry before they Laugh, a long time you know. + +_Peg._ Yes; and so thou art new born indeed to me, my _Numpy_; for I was +told you were dead long since, and never thought to see this dear sweet +Face of thine again: I heard thou wert div'd to the bottom of the Sea, +and that you never did intend to see poor _Peggy_ more. + +_Comp._ He, he, he, I was going down, as you say _Peg_, but I thought +better on't, and turn'd back: I heard an ill Report of my Neighbours +there; the devouring Sharks, and other Sea-Monsters, whose Company, to +tell you the Truth, I did not like; and therefore resolv'd to come home +and bide with thee my Girl--Come kiss thy poor Hubby, kiss me I say, for +Sorrow begins to ebb apace. + +_Peg._ A thousand, thousand Welcomes home dear _Numpy_! + +_Comp._ An Ocean of Thanks, kind _Peggy_: Well, and how goes all at +Home? What Lank still, poor _Peg_? Wil't ne're be full Sea at our Wharf? + +_Peg._ Alas, Husband, what do you mean? + +_Comp._ A Lass, is it, or a Lad, Wench? I shou'd be glad of both; I +look'd for a pair of Compasses long afore now. + +_Peg._ What, and you from home, Love? + +_Comp._ I from home? Why tho I was from home, and other of our +Neighbours from home, does that follow that every body else is from +home? + +_Peg._ I am pleased you are so merry, Husband. + +_Comp._ Merry, nay I'll be merrier yet; why shou'd I be sorry? I hope my +Boy's well, is he not? Od's fish, I look for another by this Time. + +_Peg._ Boy, what Boy, Deary? + +_Comp._ What Boy! why the Boy I got when I came home in the Cock-boat +one Night, about a Year ago; You have not forgotten it, I hope, I think +I left behind me for a Boy, and a Boy I look for. + + _Peg._ I find he knows all--What shall I do? [_Aside._] + O dear Husband, pray pardon me. [_Kneels._] + +_Comp._ Pardon thee; why I hope thou hast not made away with my Boy, +hast thou? Od's death I'll hang thee, if there were never a Whore more +in _London_, if thou hast. + +_Peg._ O no; but your long Absence, and the Rumour of your Death, +[_Cries._] made me think I might venture. + +_Comp._ Venture, quoth a, I can't blame thee, _Peg_; for _Wapping_, if +it were twice _Wapping_, can't hold out always, no more than _Redriff_, +_Limehouse_ or _Shadwel_, nay or the strongest Suburbs about _London_; +and when it comes to that, wo be to the City too, Girl. + +_Peg._ Consider, Husband, I'm but a Woman, neither the first or last +that have done the same, and truly I won't deny but I have a Child. + +_Comp._ Have you so? And what by Consequence must I have then, I pray? + +_Peg._ If you'l forgive me this Time, it shall be so no more, indeed and +indeed, now. + +_Comp._ Well, well. I will forgive thee, _Peg_, upon this Condition, +that you tell me who it was that fell foul aboard thee, and sprung this +Leak in thee. + +_Peg._ O dear Husband! + +_Comp._ Nay, no Excuses, for I must know. + +_Peg._ Why then truly it was Mr. _Venter_ the Merchant. + +_Comp._ I am beholding to him, and wou'd requite his Civility, if his +Wife were but as willing, tho he be one of our Merchants at Sea, he +shall give me leave to be Owner at home; and where is my Boy? what, +shan't I see him? + +_Peg._ Yes if you please, good Husband: He's nurs'd at _Bednal green_; +'tis now too late, to Morrow will be better. + +_Comp._ Come then we'l home and to bed. + + _Let other Fools repine at Scoffs and Scorns, + I'll teach the Cuckold how to hide his Horns._ + +[Exeunt. + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman, _Mr._ Venter, Spruce, _Mrs._ Venter _and_ +Clara. + +_Mer._ Was the like ever known, that a Bridegroom shou'd absent himself +on his Wedding-Day? + +Mr. _Ven._ 'Tis somewhat strange indeed. + +_Mer._ And the Bride too my Daughter, she's out of the way: Why what +shou'd be the meaning of all this, Od's bobs I can't tell? + +Mrs. _Ven._ Perhaps they'r busy Brother, privately conferring Notes +together: You can't tell but that the young Man may have a stomach to +his Supper, and fall too unawares, and we ne're the wiser. + +_Spr._ Od's nigs, very true; what wou'd you say then Sir, if they shou'd +be stol'n away, and a-bed together seriously? + +_Mer._ What wou'd I say? marry I wou'd say, Speed 'em well: And if no +worse News ever comes to me, I'll be hang'd if e're I cry'd for't. + +_Enter Nurse._ + +How now, what's the Business with you? + +_Nurse._ Business enough, Forsooth; for I have the strangest Tydings! + +_Mer._ Of any One that's lost, Woman? + +_Nurse._ No forsooth, of One that's found again, an't please you. + +_Mer._ O, he was lost then it seems. + +Mr. _Ven._ Her Business is with me, I believe Brother; is it not, Woman? + +_Nurse._ Yes, Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Come hither then, [_Nurse whispers Mr._ Venter.] How, +return'd? + +_Nurse._ Yes indeed, Sir, and all discovered. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ah Curse on the Wind that blew him ashore. + +_Nurse._ Aye, so say I Sir, and did not sink him when he was going. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, well, be sure you do not let him come near the Child. + +_Nurse._ I warrant you, Sir, if you charge me to the contrary. + +Mr. _Ven._ Yes, I do strictly charge you as you tender my Displeasure. + +_Nurse._ Well then let me alone--Besides, Sir, he intends to come to +morrow morning with his Wife and see him. + +Mr. _Ven._ I'll meet him there; and if he chance to be there before me, +be sure to keep the Child safe, and not let him touch it. + +_Nurse._ I warrant you, let me alone. + +[_Exit Nurse._ + +_Enter_ Summerfield _and_ Arabella. + +_Mer._ So, so, Heaven be praised, they are not both lost I see, here's +the Bride, my Daughter, come again. + +_Ara._ Father, and Gentlemen, I desire ye to treat this Stranger here +with all Respect and Generosity; He's a loving Kinsman of my _Bonvile_'s +who kindly came to congratulate our Wedding. + +_Mer._ Sir, you are heartily welcome. Od's bobs you are. + +Mr. _Ven._ Welcome to all of us. + +_Spruce._ Seriously, Sir, and so you are. + +_Mer._ But where's the Bridegroom, Girl? Od's bobs we're all at a +Nonplus here, at a stand, quite out; the Musicks ceas'd, and we all look +as tho there were neither a light Heart or Heel among us; nay, my Cousin +_Clara_ too as cloudy as on a washing Day. + +_Clara._ 'Tis then because you will not dance with me, Sir. + +_Ara._ 'Tis I alone have cause to be sad, if this Day's Happiness cou'd +admit of any; But I've long reason'd with my pressing Thoughts, and from +them drawn some Symptoms of Relief. Suppose this Day hath long since +appointed by my dear _Bonvile_, to meet some Foe, and right his injur'd +Reputation: Nay, say he fights, alas! Why shou'd I fear, when all the +Powers above, that guard true Love and Innocence, will never see him +fall. + +_Mer._ Prethee peace, good Girl hold thy tongue; Od's bobs thou'lt make +us all Cowards, to hear a Woman preach up Valour thus. + +_Ara._ Well, Sir, I have done: But pray entertain this Gentleman kindly +for my sake. Indeed I was afraid when I saw him first. + +_Sum._ Ha! what does she say? Od's Death she'l tell! + +_Ara._ Being in search of my dear _Bonvile_, I had quite lost my Way +when he most opportunely came unto my Aid, and gave me many marks of his +Esteem in my distress of Fears; nay more than this, which I'll declare +at large. + +_Sum._ Death and Hell, she'l betray me. + +_Ara._ Well, Gentlemen, since the Bridegroom's absent, I must supply his +Place: Come, when I have waited on you to your Pleasure, I will return +[_To_ Summerfield.] to you, Sir, we must discourse more of my _Bonvile_ +yet. + +[_Exeunt all but_ Summerfield.] + +_Manet_ Summerfield _solus._ + +_Sum._ What a trembling Trade's this, when Conscience, that shou'd be +our only Guide, flies and leaves us to our accusing Guilt. A Thief! the +very Name and Thought chills my Blood, and makes me tremble like an +Ague-fit. A Dog, nay every Bough that moves, puts us in fear of present +Apprehension. Sure I shall never thrive on this Trade: Perhaps I need +take no further Care, I may be now near to my Journey's End, or at least +in a fair way to _Newgate_, and from thence to _Tyburn_, the only Place +that we poor Rogues can claim for an Inheritance. Trust a Woman, and +with a Matter of such Importance, what a simple Dog am I? I cou'd find +in my Heart to run away: And that were base to run from a woman; I can +lay claim to nothing but her Vows, and those the Women seldom or never +mind. + +_Enter_ Arabella. + +_Ara._ So, Sir, now you shall find a Woman as good as her Promise; Here +are 20 Pieces, the full Value, on my Life, of what they cost. + +_Sum._ Pray, Madam, do not thus suspend my doubtful Soul; but if you do +design to insnare my Life, speak, speak freely: Or if the Constable be +at the Door, let him shew his Staff of Authority, perhaps I may corrupt +him with a Bribe. + +_Ara._ How! base ungrateful Man, do you suspect my Faith? Nay then, +Father, Uncle, and Gentlemen, where are you? + +_Enter all as before._ + +_Mer._ How now, how now! What's the matter, Girl? + +_Ara._ For shame, will you not entertain your Kinsman here a little +better: you leave him here alone, as tho you despised his Company. + +_Mer._ Is that all? I thought the Bridegroom had been return'd: Sir, +pray pardon this Rudeness; But indeed I had quite forgot you, quite +forgot you, as I hope to be sav'd: But what makes you tremble, Sir, are +you ill dispos'd. + +_Ara._ Think you he hath not reason to be ill-disposed at this cold +[_Aside to Justice_ Merryman.] Entertainment? for my part I blush for +shame. + +_Spr._ Come pray, Sir, shake off this Dulness, and participate of our +Mirth, Od's nigs do. + +_Sum._ I am very well, Sir, I thank you, only the Gentleman is a little +under a Mistake. + +_Mer._ It may be so, Ay, ay, it may be so; I vow I thought you had +trembled, but I believe it might be my own Hand; you must pardon me, I +was stiffer once. + +_Sum._ Sir, your humble Servant. + +_Mer._ But, Gentlemen, what think you of an Adventure? + +_Spr._ Adventure whither? + +_Mer._ Why, to the _East-Indies_? I have a Vessel, Gentlemen, called the +_Sea-Horse_, bound thither, and to morrow I do expect her to sail. Now, +Gentlemen, if you'l venture, ye shall have fair Dealing, that I'll +promise you. And for the French, you need not fear them, for she is a +smart new Vessel: Nay, she hath a Letter of Mart too, and twenty brave +roaring Boys on both Sides her, Starboard and Larboard: And I intend to +go as far as _Marget_ down with her, 'twill be as good as Physick to me. + +_Spr._ A very good Motion, Sir, I begin, there's my ten Pieces. + +_Sum._ And, Sir, if a proffer'd Love may be accepted, be pleased to take +my ten Pieces with you. + +_Mer._ Your's above all the rest, Sir. + +_Ara._ That's kindly said, Sir, and I thank you: Now pray venture Ten +more for my sake. + +_Sum._ Alas, Madam, it's a younger Brother's Portion. + +_Ara._ At my Request, Sir, venture the other Ten; if you want, I'll +supply you with as many more. + +_Sum._ With all my Heart then: Come, Sir, if you please, I'll double +mine: So now she's got her Gold again, and I am now no Thief, (_aside_) +Sir, I have a Suit to you, + +[_To_ Merryman. + +_Mer._ You may command it, for I am always at your Service: But pray +your Pleasure? + +_Sum._ My Request, Sir, is, to have the Honour of keeping you Company to +Sea, for I have a great desire to see _Marget_. + +_Mer._ Sir, I shall be very happy in your good Company. + +_Ara._ I hope you will be both better acquainted e're you return; and by +that time your Kinsman may be here to make you more welcome. + + _And for the Gold at my Request you lent, + I'll double it to give you more content._ + + Sum. _Why shou'd I fear, since she is prov'd so just? + I'll quit my Trade: Now_ Jack Catch _do thy worst._ + +_Exeunt._ + +_The End of the Second ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Third. + +_A Wood_ + + +_Enter_ Bonvile _and_ Friendly. + +_Bon._ Come my brave _Friendly_, I think we are here the first: Your +Enemy is not yet i'th Field; let's walk a Turn or two, perhaps by that +time he may arrive. + +_Fri._ I'm very confident that he's here already. + +_Bon._ Thy Looks, me-thinks, speak Conquest sure thy own; an ardent Rage +has kindled both thy Cheeks. + +_Fri._ Like a red Morning, Friend; which still foretels a stormy Day to +follow--And now I well observe your Face, me-thinks it waxes pale, +there's Death in it already. + +_Bon._ How, _Friendly_, do you then take me for a Coward? My Face look +pale, and Death in it already? By Heav'n, shou'd any but my _Friendly_ +dare to tell me what thou hast said, my Sword shou'd ram the base +Affront down the curst Villain's Throat. But you are my Friend, and I +must only chide your Error. But prethee tell me who is it you are to +fight with, for as yet I am ignorant both of the Cause and Person. + +_Fri._ Ha, his Name! Did you enquire his Name? + +_Bon._ Yes. + +_Fri._ I dare not yet reveal it for fear of---- + +_Bon._ For fear of what? + +_Fri._ O Confusion! I know not what to say! + +_Bon._ How, afraid to tell his Name? Then I begin to doubt the Justice +of your Quarrel. + +_Fri._ Too well you may, for by yon' setting Sun, that Globe of heavenly +Light I swear, I come to kill the only Man that strives to save my +Life--Man did I say? Nay more than common Man, for those the World +abound with; but such a Man besides, all this vast Land affords not. + +_Bon._ By this your large Encomium of your Friend, I'm afraid 'twas Wine +first made your Quarrel, and thereupon this Challenge did ensue. + +_Fri._ O no! I call the Powers above to witness, that in all the Course +of our unhappy Friendship, I to my knowledg never did receive the least +Affront or Injury from him. + +_Bon._ How came this Challenge then? + +_Fri._ O dear Friend, the noblest that Man cou'd ever boast of: +[_embraces him_] When first my rigid Fate threw on me this Command to +fight, I had recourse to many whom I always thought my Friends; but when +the Touchstone of my Danger try'd 'em, I found 'em like the cursed Fruit +of _Sodom_, fair without, but rotten at the Heart: But then I found out +_Bonvile_, my only dearest Friend. _Bonvile_ no sooner heard of my +Engagement, but flew unto my Succour with as much Bravery, as a great +General hastned by Alarms, marches to meet the Foe: You left your +Nuptial Bed perhaps to meet your Death. O unheard-of Friendship! My +Father gave me Life, 'tis true; but you, my Friend, support my Honour. +All this for me, while I, ungrateful Man, thus seek your Life: For to my +eternal Horror be it spoke, you are the Man whom I come here to kill. + +_Bon._ Ha! + +_Fri._ Too true alas! there read the Warrant for your Death. + +[_Gives him the Letter._] + +_Bon._ 'Tis a Woman's Hand. + +_Fri._ Yes, and a bad One too, they all speak fair, write foul, but mean +worse. + +_Bon._ How! kill me? Sure, I dream, and this is all Delusion, or else +thou dost it only to try thy Friend. + +_Fri._ O, from my Soul, I wish it were no more. But read, read on, see +how I'm fetter'd in a _Circe's_ Charms--I love beyond Imagination, love +even to Madness, and must as madly do a Deed will damn me to the hottest +Flames of Hell. + +_Bon._ And woo't thou kill thy Friend for such a Woman? + +_Fri._ Alas! I must, you see I am commanded, commanded too by Love; Love +more powerful than all the Sacred Ties of Friendship, therefore draw, +and guard thy self. [_Draws._ + +_Bon._ Not I by Heaven! What wou'dst thou have me draw and kill my +Friend? + +_Fri._ There thou stab'st my Soul. O where, where is now my Resolution +fled? A fatal Blast has struck me; a sudden Horror shot me thro the +Heart; a Trembling seiz'd my Knees, that I can hardly stand, and all my +Vital Powers methinks seem dead; yet Love's the Fire must kindle all +again, therefore I charge thee draw, or naked as thou art, I will assail +thee. + +_Bon._ I am defended against all that thou canst do, in having Justice +on my Side, and Friendship too to back it. + + _But since Humanity now bears so sway, + To this unguarded Breast come make your way._ + +Strike home be sure. + +[_Opens his Bosom._ + +_Fri._ That were a barbarous Murder. + +_Bon._ How can the Effect prove different from the Cause? Or how can any +thing but damn'd Barbarity ensue a Woman's much more damn'd Design? Who +wou'd expect Reason from one that raves, or hope for Mercy in a Tyger's +Den? Believe me, _Friendly_, all this may sooner be; Mercy may sooner +dwell among the Savage Wolves and Bears, than in a Woman's Breast. + +_Fri._ O, my too rigid Fate, to place me thus on such a dangerous +Precipice, that wheresoe're I turn my self for help, I see my Ruin still +before mine Eyes. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Bon._ [_Pausing._] Stay--The Command which thy _Medea_ sent thee, was +to kill thy only dearest Friend, was it not? + +_Fri._ Alas! it was. + +_Bon._ Then here, all Friendship dies between us; thus hast thou kill'd +thy Friend, and satisfied that infernal Hag, thy cursed Mistress, who +thus commanded thee: Away, I say, begon, and never see me more. + +_Fri._ Ha! + +_Bon._ Yes, base ungrateful Wretch, farewel, (_Offers to go_) --Yet +stay, and since that Sacred Tie of Friendship's broke, know thou, most +vile of Men, that _Bonvile_'s now thy Enemy; therefore do thou draw and +guard thy spotted Life. + +_Fri._ How, Friend! + +_Bon._ Friend didst thou call me? On forfeit of thy Life that word no +more; the very Name of Friend from thee, shall be a Quarrel: How can I +tell but that thou lovest my Wife, and therefore feign'd this damn'd +Design to draw me from her Arms? + +_Fri._ How! wrong thy Wife? O no, I never had a Thought so vile! Yet you +must forgive me, indeed you must, by all that once was dear to me; and +what I dare not mention more, by Love and Honour, I implore thy +Pardon--Still art thou deaf to my Complaints?--Nay, then upon my Knee, I +will enforce thy Pity. Behold me, _Bonvile_, prostrate at thy Feet, +crawling for Mercy, swimming in Tears, and almost drown'd with Shame; +extend thy Arm to help me, as thou'rt a Man, be God-like in thy Nature, +and raise me from the Grave; turn thy Eyes on me, and sink me not with +Frowns; O save me, save me, or I fall for ever. + +_Bon._ As soon shall Heav'n reverse the Fate of Hell, as I recal what I +have said, or plant thee in my Breast again. + +_Fri._ Nay, then I am lost to thee, and all the World besides. + +[_Rises._ + +_Bon._ Thou are indeed for ever lost to me; see what a miserable Wretch +thy Folly now has made thee: A Creature so far below my Pity, that I +despise and scorn thy base Submission, and will never hear thee more, +more. + +_Fri._ Say but thou hast forgiven me, and I will ask no more. + +_Bon._ I never will. + +_Fri._ O cruel _Bonvile_! + +_Bon._ More barbarous _Friendly_: Hold off, or I will use thee like a +Dog, tread thee to Earth, and spurn thee like a Slave, base as thou art. + +_Fri._ Still thou art my Friend---- + +_Bon._ Thou ly'st, I have abjured the Name. + +_Fri._ Let me but go with thee. + +_Bon._ Not for the World; I'de rather venture my self with Crocodiles, +catch the last dying Gasps of some poor Wretch infested with the Plague, +than trust my self with thee. + + _Farewel, I leave thee with the greatest Curse, + Condemn'd to Woman, Hell affords no worse._ + +[_Exit, breaking from him._ + +Friendly solus, _rising in a Passion._ + +_Fri._ Death and Destruction, am I thus despised! Condemned to Woman's +Lust, and scorn'd by Man. By _Bonvile_ too, after imploring, like a +School-Boy, at his Feet--My Blood boils high, and scalds my very Heart! +My inward Grief calls on me for Revenge, and I am all on fire! O that I +had the proud _Bonvile_ here now at my Feet, I'de use him worse than he +did me before. + + _But since that open Force yields no Relief, + Private Revenge shall ease my swelling Grief. + With Thoughts of Jealousy I'll fill his Soul, + Which shall its Powers of all their Rest controul. + Thus for a Woman I've begun a War, + And for her sake must damn my Soul like her._[Exit. + + +SCENE the Second. + +_Enter_ Nurse, Compass, _and his Wife._ + +_Nurse._ Indeed you must pardon me, I can't let ye see the Child; to +tell you the Truth, I am commanded to the contrary. + +_Comp._ Commanded! Prethee who commanded thee? + +_Nurse._ The Father. + +_Comp._ The Father, Why who am I? + +_Nurse._ Not the Father sure, the Civil Law has found it otherwise. + +_Comp._ The Civil Law found it otherwise! Why then the Uncivil Law shall +make it mine again, I'll be as dreadful as a _Shrove-Tuesday_ to thee; +for I'll besiege thy squalling catterwauling Castle, with my Friends the +Mob, and gut thy stinking Nursery, but I'll both see and have my Child. + +_Nurse._ Harkee, Goodman Swabber, say but half so much again, and I'll +call the Constable, and lay Burglary to your Charge. You wou'd not be so +hot if the Enemy were in View, nor if you had to do with any body but a +poor innocent Woman, so you wou'd'nt. + +_Peg._ Good Husband be patient, and let me alone with her: Come, come, +good Nurse, let him see the Boy. + +_Nurse._ Indeed I dare not Goody _Compass_: The Father first you know +delivered me the Child, and order'd me to let no body see it. He pays me +well and weekly for my Pains, and therefore I'll do as be bad me, so I +will. + +_Comp._ Why thou white Bastard-breeder; Is not this Woman here the +Mother? + +_Nurse._ Yes, I grant you that. + +_Comp._ Do you so? Well, and I grant it too; And is not the Child then +my own by the Wives Copy-hold? + +_Nurse._ The Law must try that. + +_Comp._ The Law! What then you think I'll be but its Father-in-Law? I +tell thee, all the Wit and Law twixt _Cuckolds-Point_ and +_Westminster-Hall_, shan't keep my own dear Flesh and Blood from me, I +warrant you that. No an't does, I'll be hanged at the Main-yard: Why, +who, dost think, uses to get my Children but my self? + +_Nurse._ Nay, I can't tell; you must look to that, for my part I ne're +knew you get any. + +_Comp._ Say'st thou so? Why, look you, do but put on a clean Smock, and +try me, if thou darst, I'll hold thee three to one I get thee with Child +before I leave thee: Heh! what say'st thou? + +[_Offers to lay hold on her._. + +_Nurse._ I'll see you hang'd first--Nay, pray be quiet, and don't offer +to spoil my Milk. Lord, you are as boisterous as my Husband was the +first Night we were married: Pray, Goody _Compass_, take off your Cur, +or else he'l bite me. + +_Peg._ No never fear him, Nurse, he's not so furious I assure ye. + +_Enter Mr._ Venter _and his Wife._ + +_Nurse._ O! here's my Master, the Child's Father, now talk with him. + +Mr. _Ven._ Good morrow Neighbour, good morrow to ye both. + +_Comp._ Both! Good morrow to you and your Wife too, if you go to that. + +Mr. _Ven._ I wou'd speak calmly with you, Friend, if you think fit. + +_Comp._ I know what belongs to Calm, and a Storm too; and if you please, +a cold word or two wi' you. + +Mr. _Ven._ With all my Heart. + +_Comp._ I understand that you have ty'd your Mare in my Ground. + +Mr. _Ven._ My Mare, Friend, nay I assure you, 'twas only my Nag. + +_Comp._ Your Nag? Well your Nag then let it be: Harke, Sir, to be short, +I'll cut off your Nag's Tail, if e're I catch him there again. + +Mr. _Ven._ Pray hear me, you are too rough to maintain---- + +_Comp._ I say, Sir, you shall maintain no Child of mine; my Wife does +not bestow her Labour for that purpose. + +Mr. _Ven._ You are too passionate--I will not maintain---- + +_Comp._ No marry shall you not. + +Mr. _Ven._ The Deed I have done to be lawful, I have repented it, and +given Satisfaction to the Law, my Purse has paid for't; therefore I +wou'd treat milder with you if you'd be pleased. + +_Comp._ Yes, yes, I am very well pleased, and shall be better pleased if +you can serve me so still: For, look you Sir, one of these Days I shall +to Sea again, you know where my Wife lives; yet you'l but lose your +labour, for get as many Children as you can, I assure you, you shall +keep none of them. + +Mr. _Ven._ I think you are mad. + +_Comp._ Why, if I am Horn-mad, what's that to you? + +Mr. _Ven._ Nay then, since you are so rough, I tell you plainly you +are--a---- + +_Comp._ A what? What am I, heh? + +Mr. _Ven._ A Coxcomb. + +_Comp._ A Coxcomb! a Cuckold you mean, and you a Fool for your pains. + +Mr. _Ven._ The Child is mine, I am the Father of it, and will keep it. + +_Comp._ Yes if you can, I know you will. But pray tell me, is not my +Wife the Mother? You may be as far from being the Father as I am, for my +Wife's acquainted with more Whore-masters besides your self; ay, and as +crafty Merchants too, let me tell you that. + +_Peg._ No indeed Husband, I had to do with no body else, 'twas he begot, +indeed and indeed now. Yet for all that, the Child's mine, I bred it and +bore it, and I'll have it and keep it, so I will. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Pray hold there Mrs. Jill-flurt, the Child's my Husband's, +and he shall have it, or I'll tear your Eyes out, ye Whore you. + +_Comp._ Good Words, Mistress; d'ye hear, give good Words you'd best, or +I shall tell you your own. + +Mr. _Ven._ I'll have no more to say to ye, the Law shall determine it; +in the mean time Nurse keep the Child for me, there, there's Money for +thee. + +[_Gives her Money. + +_Comp._ There's Money for me too, keep it for me, Nurse; give him both +thy Duggs at once, I pay thee for the right one, Girl. + +_Nurse._ I have two Hands, you see Gentlemen; this does but show ye how +the Law will hamper ye; even thus you'l be used, Gentlemen, if you go to +Law. + +Mr. _Ven._ It can't be helpt, for I won't lose my Right. + +_Comp._ Nor I mine for all you're a Merchant. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Nor I mine for all I did not bear it. + +_Peg._ Nor I, tho but a poor Sailer's Wife. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, fare ye well, we shall meet in another Place--Come +_Winny_. + +[_Exit_ Venter _and his Wife._ + +_Comp._ Ay, ay, I'll meet you when and where you dare, and do your +worst, I fear you not: By the Lord _Harry_ the World's come to a fine +Pass, that we must go to Law for our Children. No wonder the Lawyers are +all so rich, yet e're the Law shall have a Limb, a Leg, a Joint or Nail +of this same Boy, + + _'T shall cost me more than a whole Child in getting, + Some win by play, and standers by with Betting._ + +[Exeunt. + + +SCENE the Third. + +_Enter_ Spruce, Arabella _with a Letter in her Hand_, Clara, _Mr._ +Venter, _and Mrs._ Venter. + +Mr. _Ven._ From whence came that Letter, Niece? + +_Ara._ From _Putney_, Sir, and from my Husband. + +Mr. _Ven._ And pray be free; Does he tell ye the Cause of his leaving +you so abruptly on his Wedding-day? + +_Ara._ Yes; Sir, yet this had been sufficient to have let me known what +he is gone about, without the formal Addition of an Epistle. + +_Spruce._ That, why what is that I pray Madam? + +_Ara._ His Will, Sir, wherein he makes me his sole Executrix. + +_Spr._ Will! why what the Devil does he mean, seriously I can't find it +out? + +_Ara._ Why, Sir, he's gone to fight. + +_Spr._ How fight, Madam! On my Soul then I believe _Friendly_'s Second. + +_Ara._ You're in the right, he is so, and I am lost for ever! + +_Cla._ O foolish _Friendly_, this thy Mistake has made me the most +wretched of Woman-kind! Such variety of Thoughts load my afflicted +Breast, that I know not what to think: I rave, am mad, not knowing what +my Folly may produce; I fear for both, for both my Heart does bleed. + +_Ara_. Miserable Maid! nay, miserable Wife! but much more miserable +Widow! O my dear _Bonvile_! + +_Spr._ Duce take me, if e're I saw a Company so Phlegmatick in all my +Life: Mr. _Venter_, prethee let's have a Song, to pass away the Time, +and put Life into the Bride. + +Mr. _Ven._ With all my Heart, Mr. _Spruce_: Here, who waits?--Call in +the Musick, and desire 'em to oblige the Ladies with a new Song. + +[_Servant Enter and Exit._ ] + +_Cla._ Your self, Sir, you mean? + +_Spr._ Nay all of us I protest. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ay, ay, all of us. + +_Enter Musick and others who sing._ + +A Dialogue set by _Seignior Baptist_. + + Man. _A Woman's Love_ Woman. _And Man's is such,_ + Man. _Still too little,_ Wom. _Or else too much._ + Wom. _Men are Extreams,_ Man. _And Women too,_ + Wom. _All, all are false,_ Man. _All, All like you._ + Wom. _You'll swear and lie,_ Man. _If you'l believe,_ + Wom. _And sigh and die,_ Man. _Yet still deceive._ + Wom. _Your Vows and Oaths_ Man. _Your Smiles and Tears,_ + Wom. _Are all but Baits,_ Man. _Are all but Snares._ + Wom. _To win a Heart,_ Man. _And then destroy,_ + Wom. _The easy Fool,_ Man. _The promis'd Joy._ + +Another Strain. + + Wom. _I'le have you offer no more your Pretending,_ + Man. _Nor will I suffer your modish Dissembling:_ + Wom. _For Honour commands,_ + Man. _And Freedom withstands,_ + Wom. _What you?_ + Man. _And you._ + Wom. _I know wou'd have me be, your Slave,_ + Man. _I know wou'd have me be, your Slave._ + Wom. _O, no, no, no!_ + Man. _No, no, no, no!_ + Wom. _I never will agree,_ + Man. _I ever will be free._ + +_After the Song enter Justice_ Merryman, Summerfield, _and three or four +Sailers._ + +_Mer._ Daughter, Daughter! Where's my Daughter? I say, Where's my +Daughter? O Girl, I have the best News to tell you---- + +_Ara._ What of my Husband, Sir? + +_Mer._ No, no, of your Cousin, Girl, of your Cousin. + +_Ara._ What of him, Sir? + +_Mer._ Such a Cousin, Girl, such a dear Cousin he is, as _Alexander the +Great_, if he were alive, might be proud and boast of. + +_Ara._ You're welcome here again, Sir; You've made but a short Voyage, +pray what occasion'd your Return so speedily? + +_Sum._ Madam, I render you ten thousand Thanks; Your Generosity and +Goodness has wholly made me yours; I am the humblest of your faithful +Admirers. + +_Ara._ Forbear such lavish Gratitude; You'r too profuse in your +Acknowledgment of your small Favours. But pray be brief, and let me know +the happy Occasion of this your sudden Return, I long methinks to hear +it. + +_Sum._ Madam, you may command me--Not to molest the Company with the +Recital of every vain and needless Circumstance; 'twas briefly thus. +Scarce had we passed by _Marget_ on our Course, when on a sudden, from +the Top-mast head, a Sailer cries, All hands Aloft, three Sails ahead: +With that we rumidg and clear our Deck, our Gun-room arm'd, and all +things now are ready for a Fight. The Ships before descried, with +warlike Stems cut the resisting Waves, whilst from their Pendants +fluttering in the Air, we found they were three _Dunkirk_ Privateers; +they having made our English Cross advanced, salute us with a +Broad-side, to make us strike and yield: But we, who ne're knew as yet +what 'twas so cowardly to yield, and not regarding their unequal Odds, +fell boldly on, returning Fire for Fire. The Engagement then grew +desperate, for they on either Side fired in amain, whilst we withstood +their Force. At length they boldly grappled, and laid us close aboard, +and we as bravely beat them off again. + +_Mer._ But now, Daughter, mark what follows, for that's worth all, +I'faith it is; therefore go on, dear Cuz, go on. + +_Sum._ Sea-room at length we got; when (as Fate wou'd have it) an +unlucky Shot struck both the Captain and Lieutenant dead. Then we began +to fear, and all our noble Hearts were trembling with despair. + +_Mer._ No, no, not all Daughter--But you shall hear more--Ods bobs you +shall. + +_Sum._ How cou'd it be otherwise, when both our Commanders now were +lost? therefore to strike was all the Talk---- + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, now Daughter, now comes the Play, the other was only the +Prologue. + +_Sum._ But Fortune favouring, and the Wind springing a fresh Gale, we +got clear off and try'd to make a running Fight. + +_Mer._ Ay, but Cuz, how did we do all this? by whose Order and +Direction? + +_Sum._ Pardon me, Sir, 'twas of so small Moment, that already it has +slipt my treacherous Memory. + +_Mer._ Oh, ho! has it so! Ha, ha, ha! But it has not mine, I thank you, +no marry has it not, as you shall hear--Then he, with an undaunted +Spirit, started up amongst the Sailers, and---- + +_Sum._ Nay pray Sir---- + +_Mer._ By the Foot of _Pharaoh_ I'll not be balkt; he, I say, with an +Heroick Voice cried out, Courage brave boys, Charge and Discharge amain; +come I'll supply your fall'n Captain's place. At this blest News they +all fell on again, with ten thousand times more Fury than before: +Victory, Victory, was all their cry, whilst he my Cousin here, whom I +shall ne're forget, for by the Lord, methinks, I see him in the Fight +this very Instant, now running this way, now running that way, now down +to the Gun-room to encourage those that fought there; now upon the Deck +again, still crying out, Fear not, brave Boys, the Day will soon be +our's. + +_Sum._ O pray, Sir, let me intreat you to forbear, you make me ashamed, +I protest, to hear you. + +_Mer._ Ashamed, say you? Ha, ha, ha! + +_Ara._ Good Sir, go on. + +_Mer._ I will, I will--At length the proud French swallowing too many of +our English Balls, two of 'em very fairly cried, Your Servants +Gentlemen, farewel, and down they went. The other having lost most of +her Men, resolved to leave us; but we being too nimble, overtook her, +clapt some Men aboard, and brought her in a Prize: And this my brave Man +of War here, was the first that boarded her with Sword in Hand. + +_1 Sailer._ Of all this I was an Eye-witness. + +_2 Sailer._ And so was I. + +_3 Sailer._ And I, and all of us. + +_Mer._ Yes, and many more stout Boys besides. + +_Spruce._ Sir, we are all indebted to your Valour; such Voyages as +these, from small Venturers, in time may make us great Merchants. + +_Mer._ Well, never was Fight better managed before, that's certain. + +_1 Sail._ No, never, never! + +_2 Sail._ Better, say you? No nor half so well. + +_3 Sail._ If it were in our Power, we'd make him Admiral, so we wou'd. + +_Sum._ Gentlemen, 'tis to your Valours all, that I am indebted for the +Honour I have gain'd: And that I may not seem wholly ungrateful, there, +there's something in token of my Thankfulness. + +[_Gives 'em Money._ + +_1, 2, 3 Sailers._ Heaven bless your Worship. + +_Ara._ Come Cousin, we'l withdraw into the Parlour: And if these honest +Friends will be pleased to drink what our House affords, they shall be +welcome. + +_1 Sail._ Thank you Mistress with all our Hearts. + +[Exeunt _all but Sailers_. + +_2 Sail._ Well, this Mr. _Summerfield_ is a brave Fellow, Gadzooks he +is. + +_3 Sail._ Ay _Tom_ so he is; had it not been for him, we had all been +taken on my Conscience. + +_1 Sail._ On my Soul and so we had: O if you had but seen him when he +boarded the _Monsieur_, 'twou'd have made you laugh 'till you had split +your Sides. He came up to the Captain o'this fashion with a Slap--ha! +and gave him such a back-handed wipe, that he cut off his Head as +genteely, as tho he had served seven Years Apprenticeship to't. + +_Enter Servant with a Bowl of Punch._ + +_Serv._ Gentlemen, Mr. _Summerfield_ desires ye to be merry, and has +sent you this to drink his Health. + +_1 Sail._ O, the Lord bless him, he's a fine Gentleman, and so pray tell +him, and withal give him our hearty Thanks; Dost hear Boy? + +_Serv._ Yes, yes, I will. + +[_Exit._ + +_2 Sail._ What is't Brother? + +_3 Sail._ Punch by this Light! + +Omnes. _Hoo-ra; Hoo-ra; Viva_ Mr. _Summerfield, Viva, Hoora._ + +[The first Sailer takes the Bowl of Punch, walks in state round the +Stage, and sings; the others all follow.] + + _Here's a Health to jolly_ Bacchus, + _Here's a Health to jolly_ Bacchus, + _Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho._ + _For he will merry make us,_ + _For he will merry make us,_ + _Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho._ + _Then sit ye down together,_ + _Then sit ye down together._ + +[_They all sit down with the Bowl in the middle._ + +_2 Sail._ Pshaw! Pox o'th' this old Song, prithee let's have a Dance. + +_3 Sail._ With all my Heart; strike up Musick. + +_The Sailers and their Wives dance._ + +After the Dance. + + 1 Sail. _So, well done my Lads, now let's aboard amain,_ + _And suck our Faces o're and o're again._ + _Brandy we've got enough, by this blest Chance,_ + _We'l nothing drink but Punch, when we get_ France. + +_Omn._ Hoora! Hoora! Exeunt omnes. + +_The End of the Third ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Fourth. + +_A Tavern._ + +[2 Tables, three Chairs to each.] + + +_Enter_ Compasse, Peg, _and_ Pettifog. + +_A Drawer Meets them._ + +_Drawer._ Welcome Gentlemen. Please to walk into a Room? + +_Compasse:_ Aye Boy. Come Mr. _Pettifog_, please you sit. + +_Pettifog:_ With all my Heart; Come Mistress. + +_Draw._ What Wine will you be pleased to drink, Gentlemen? + +_Pett._ Ask the good Woman: speak Mistress. + +_Com._ Canary for her; I know what relishes her Palat best. A Quart of +brisk Canary, Boy. + +_Draw._ Ye shall have the best in _England_.--Coming, Coming, Sir. + +[_Exit._. + +_Com._ What call you this same Tavern, Mr. Attorney? + +_Pett._ The King's Head, Sir. + +_Com._ The King's Head: Marry, it has a good Neighbour of _Guild-hall_. +It takes many a fair Pound upon that 'n Account, I warrant you. + +_Draw._ (within) A Quart of Canary in the King's-head, score. + +_Enter Drawer, fills a Glass, and gives it_ Compasse. + +_Draw._ Sir, Here's a Glass of the richest Canary that ever came over, +the very Quintessence of the Grape I assure you. + +_Com._ Say'st thou so? Why then there's a Tester for thee, and so leave +us--. Come, Mr. _Pettifog_, [_Exit Drawer_] and 't please you my Service +to you. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Pett._ I thank you kindly, Sir.--Mrs. my Service to you, your Husband's +good Health. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Peg._ With all my Heart indeed, Here my dear black ey'd Rogue, thy +n'own good Health. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Com._ Thank you _Peg_, thank you, so now let's mind our Business. + +_Enter Mr._ Ventere, _his Wife, and_ Dodge, _to another Table in the +same Room._ + +Mr. _Ven._ Show a Room, Drawer. + +_Draw._ Here Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ne're a private Room? + +_Draw._ No Sir, the House is full. + +_Com._ Ods fish, whom have we here, my Wife's Merchant, with his Lawyer? + + +_Pett._ Ye know we promised to give him a Meeting here. + +_Comp._ 'Tis true we did so,--but come to the Business in hand. + +[_Pettifog_ and _Compasse_ talk privately. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, bring us a Bottle of your best Red. + +_Draw._ You shall have it, Sir. + +[_Exit_ Drawer. + +Mr. _Ven._ And what do you think of my Cause, Mr. _Dodge_? + +_Dodge._ O we shall carry it most certainly: You have Money to go +through with the Business; and ne're fear but we'll trounce them +swingingly. + +Mr. _Ven._ I warrant you think it very strange, Mr. _Dodge_, that I am +at this Charge and Expence to bring a farther Charge upon me. + +_Dodge._ Not I, I assure you, Sir, for I know you are a wise Man, and +know very well what you do; besides you have Money, Money enough, Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Why the short and the long of the Business is this; I made a +Purchase lately, and in that I did estate the Child (about which I'm +sued) Joint-Purchaser with me in all the Land I bought. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Right Husband; and you know 'twas I that advised you to make +the Purchase, and therefore I'll never give my Consent to have the Child +brought up by such a stinking Tar-barrel as now sues for him; he'd only +bring him up to be a Swabber; no, no, he was born a Merchant and a +Gentleman, and he shall live and die so. + +_Dodge._ You are a worthy Gentlewoman upon my word; there are but few of +such a noble Temper: But what makes the Fool of the Husband then so +troublesome; does he not know when he's well? + +Mrs. _Ven._ So 'tis a sign. + +_Dodge._ A Blockhead, to proclaim his own Disgrace, and make himself +laugh'd at. + +Mr. _Ven._ That's not it, he hopes to be the better by what is settled +on the Boy. + +_Dodge._ O, God's so, that's true: But never fear, I'll be hang'd if he +carry it, for you have Money, as I told you, Sir, before: but see, Sir, +there they are. + +Mr. _Ven._ Yes, Yes, I saw them before: but come, where's our Wine? +(_Within_) [the Bell rings as at the Bar. + +_Enter Drawer with a Bottle of Wine._ + +_Draw._ Here Sir,--Coming, Coming, Sir: _Philip_, speak up in the +Mermaid, and bid _Jack_ light a Fire. + +[_Exit_ Drawer. + +_Comp._ Well Mr. _Pettifog_, and what think you of my Suit, Sir? + +_Pett._ Why look you Sir, the Defendant you know was arrested first by a +_Latitat_ in an Action of Trespass. + +_Comp._ Yes, and a Lawyer told me, it shou'd have been an Action of the +Case, did he not, Wife? + +_Peg._ I have no Skill in the Law you know Husband, but the Gentleman +did say so. + +_Pett._ Aye, but your Action of the Case in this Point is too ticklish. + +_Comp._ Well, but pray tell me, do you think I shall overthrow my +Adversary? + +_Pett._ Without all doubt, the Child he says is none of yours, What of +that! I marry a Widow, and am by Consequence possess'd of a Ward. Now +shall not I have the Management of that Ward? Now Sir you lie at a +stronger Ward, for _Partus sequitur ventrem_, says the Civil Law: So +that if you were within the Compass of the four Seas, as the Common Law +goes, the Child must be yours, that's certain. + +_Comp._ Say you so, Sir? Why then the Child's my own, for I have been a +Coaster these five Years and more; and so my Service to you: [Drinks]. O +your Attorneys in _Guild-hall_ have a rare time on't, by the Lord +_Harry_. + +_Peg._ They are as it were both Judg and Jury themselves. + +_Comp._ And O how they will laugh at their Clients when they sit in a +Tavern, and call them Fools, Blockheads and Coxcombs, and then whip up +their Causes as nimbly as a Barber trims his Customers on a +_Christmas-Eve_; a Snip, a Wipe and away. + +_Pett._ That's very common, you shall have the like at a _Nisi-prius_. + +_Enter Drawer._ + +_Draw._ Here's a Gentleman, one Mr. Justice _Merryman_, enquires for Mr. +_Ventere_ the Merchant. + +Mr. _Ven._ Here Boy, desire them to walk up. [_Exit_ Drawer.] 'Tis my +Brother, and a Counsellor, to make an End of this same Business. + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman _and a Counsellor; both Tables rise and join +together._ + +_Merr._ Your Servant, Gentlemen, your Servant: Counsellor _Blunder_ and +I have been canvasing the Business of this your Difference; and I +believe, Brother, the Law will determine it as we have done; for it is +point blank against you. + +Mr. _Ven._ If it is, I must be contented: Well Sir, the Child's your +Wife's, and you shall have it; and to endear you the more to't, I'll +settle my part of the Estate on you and yours for ever: Give me your +Hand. + +[_They shake Hands._ + +We now are Friends. + +_Merr._ Why that's well said. + +_Couns._ We all are Witness to the Agreement. + +_Omnes._ All, all. + +_Comp._ Nay I scorn to be outdone in Civility; therefore if you please I +have a Gallon or two of Prize-Wine, and half a Dozen of good sound +_Bruges_-Capons, which I'll treat you and this good Company with at +Supper; but no more Mutton, no not a bit. + +_Merr._ Well Brother, I'm glad you're Friends: Ods bobs I am. But come, +let's home now, and see what's become of the Bride and Bridegroom: +Farewel Friend, farewell: Come we'll pay at the Bar. + +[_Exeunt_ Merr. _Mr._ Vent. _and his Wife,_ Couns. _and_ Dodge. + +_Comp._ Come _Peg_, Come and kiss me. + +[_Compass_ kisses Peg. + +I am Friends with thee too now. + +_Pett._ Aye, aye, you have Reason, she has earn'd you a good Fortune; +and need not venture to Sea any more: Yet one thing let me advise you, +'tis Counsel worth a good Fee, for it cures Cuckoldom. + +_Comp._ Sayst thou so, come let's hear it. + +_Pett._ This it is, Make a flat Divorce between your selves, be you no +longer her Husband, nor she your Wife: Two or three Hours after meet +again, salute, woo and wed afresh, and so the base Name of Cuckold's +blotted quite. This has been experienc'd and approved by many. + +_Comp._ 'Tis excellent i'faith,--There, there's for you; and I thank +you. _Peg_, I renounce thee,--nay and I renounce my self too from thee; +thou art now a Widow, _Peg_; I'll go hang my self two or three Hours at +one o' th' Main Yards, and so long thou shalt go drown thy self. Then +we'll meet in _White-Chappel-Fields_, as it were by chance, and woo and +wed again. + +_Peg._ With all my Heart, kind Sir, fare you well. + +_Comp._ Farewel Widow, remember Time and Place, and d' you hear, Put on +your Sabbath-day best Clothes. + +_Peg._ I will, I will. + +[_Exit Peg._ + +_Comp._ Sir, I am beholding to you for your good Counsel. + +_Pett._ No, Sir, you have paid me for 't, but I hope you do not intend +to follow your own. + +_Comp._ What is that? + +_Pett._ Why, you said you'd hang your self. + +_Camp._ No no, I have thought better on't, for I'll go drink my self +dead drunk, then wake again, wash my Face, and meet the Bride. + +_Pett._ That's well said, and I'll accompany you, and wish you Joy. + +_Comp._ Joy, Sir, I have it Sir already, in a good Estate got by a +Chopping Boy. + +[_Exeunt._ + + +SCENE II. + +_Enter_ Friendly solus. + +_Fri._ Was ever Fortune like to this of mine? Who for the Smile of a +vile simple Woman, have acted thus against my very Soul, all to please a +Creature, whose next Command perhaps will higher mount, it may be light +on my self, as now it did on _Bonvile_. + +_Enter_ Clara. + +_Cla._ Ha! _Friendly_ here alone. Now, now, my Fears begin. + +[_Aside_. + +So, Sir, you are return'd I see. + +[_To him._ + +_Fri._ Madam, I am, and like those noble Knights in former times, after +subduing all their Ladies Foes, returning with the joyful News of +Conquest, receive her trembling to their longing Arms, and claim her as +their own, so I----. + +_Cla._ What mean you, Sir? + +_Fri._ Madam, You are obeyed, your hard Commands fulfilled; at your +Request I've kill'd my Friend, nay and my best of Friends. + +_Cla._ How? kill'd your Friend for me. + +_Fri._ Indeed 'tis true. + +_Cla._ Then thou art truly wretched: But say, say quickly, who's this +unhappy Man whom thy Mistake hath thus untimely kill'd? + +_Fri._ _Bonvile._ + +_Cla._ _Bonvile_ said you? My Blood with an unusual Course runs backward +from my Heart! Horror has seiz'd my Soul! A thick-black Mist has +overcast my Sight, and I am not the same: but speak, O speak again, Was +it _Bonvile_? + +_Fri._ Why shou'd you seek to iterate my Guilt, by a Rehearsal of that +dreadful Name? Too sure, alas! It was: _Bonvile_'s the Friend I've +kill'd. + +_Cla._ Curs'd be the Tongue that spoke it, but doubly curs'd the Hand +that did the barbarous Fact. + +_Fri._ Why Madam, was it not your Command to kill my Friend; nay more, +my best of Friends? + +_Cla._ Yes, and I thought my self your best of Friends. + +_Fri._ I hope you wou'd not have had me murder'd you? + +_Cla._ No, Monster, no. + +_Fri._ These are Riddles. + +_Cla._ Fool, our whole Sex is made of nothing else: Thou mayst sooner +untie the Gordian Knot, expound the Problems of the monstrous _Sphynx_, +and read what is decreed in the mysterious Book of Fate, than unfold a +Woman's sly malitious Meaning. + +_Fri._ Very well; she first set me on to do this most accurs'd of Deeds, +and now upbraids me; nay wou'd hang me for 't: These are the Tricks of +all her damning Sex. O Woman, Woman, Woman, dear devilish Woman, +farewel. + +[_Offers to go._ + +_Cla._ Stay _Friendly_, all I have said was only to try your Constancy; +and whether you'd repent of what you've done. But tell me truly, is +_Bonvile_ surely dead? + +_Fri._ Indeed he is. + +_Cla._ 'Tis bravely done, and I adore thee for 't. By Heaven I love thee +now, even unto Dotage! + +_Fri._ Was ever Change like this? The subtlest Labyrinth Wit cou'd ere +invent, affords not half so many Turnings as a Woman's Mind. + +[_Aside._ + +What mean you, Madam, by this seeming Transport? + +_Cla._ O _Friendly_, _Friendly_, I am all o're Extasy! Thou hast done a +Deed that ravishes my Soul. At once thou hast kill'd my dear and only +Friend, and slain the fatal'st Enemy I had. + +_Fri._ What more Riddles Madam, pray explain your self. + +_Cla._ I will; I will declare a Secret which till now I never did +disclose: I lov'd that _Bonvile_ whom thou now hast slain, not as I +ought to do, but with a Woman's Love, which he never did know: And +Yesterday when I beheld the fatal Marriage ended, then like a Merchant +walking on the _Downes_, sees a rich Vessel of his own engaged, and +after took, and born away a Prize: So I, after I'd seen my _Bonvile_ +lost, (for so he was to me) resuming all the Malice of a Woman, resolved +never to entertain one Thought of Love again; but lead a Life as +_Lapland_ Witches do, only on others Ruines: Then when you approached me +with the hateful Sound of Love, to dash your Hopes, and put a Period to +your growing Passion, I bid you kill your best and dearest Friend? + +_Fri._ True. + +_Cla._ Now the best Friend to one in Love, is Love it self. + +_Fri._ O my curs'd Stars, that wrap'd me up in such a black Mistake, +What have I done? + +_Cla._ Done! Why you have done bravely, why do you tremble? + +_Fri._ An inward Guilt lies heavy on my Soul, and Horror with all her +dreadful Forms still haunts my Sight. And did you love this _Bonvile_? + +_Cla._ The Queen of Beauty never doted more on her beloved _Adonis_ than +I on him. + +_Fri._ And now as much you hate him: O the unheard-of Inconstancy of +Women! All that they have is feign'd; their Teeth, their Hair, their +Blushes, and their Smiles; nay their very Conscience (if any such they +have) is feign'd; all counterfeit and false: Let them wash, patch and +daub themselves with all the Helps for Nature that Art cou'd e're +invent, still they are Women: And let 'em rob all _India_ of its store +to adorn themselves therewith, still are they not all that thing call'd +Woman: I know not what to do, for I love and hate this Creature both at +once. + +_Cla._ What ails my _Friendly_? + +_Fri._ But _Bonvile_ yet must feel his Enemies Rage; shall he succeed in +Love, whilst I am cross'd in mine? No, it must not, cannot, nay it shall +not be. + + _Four Heads I have, to make a Plot not common; + Malice, Revenge, the Devil, and a Woman._ + +[_Offers to go._ + +_Cla._ What will you leave me then? + +_Fri._ Leave thee; yes, forever: Fly thee as I wou'd a Blast from Hell: +Thou art thy self a Hell; thy base detested hateful Woman's Breath +infects the purest Air: + + _May my Friend's Blood, which I for thee have spilt, + Light on thy Head, and your's be all the Guilt._ + +[_Exeunt_ severally. + +_Enter_ Compasse _new clothed_, Pettifog, _and two or three Men +Neighbors._ + +_Comp._ Gentlemen and Neighbours, as you have been Witnesses to our +Divorce, so shall ye now be Evidences to our next Meeting, which I look +for every Minute. + +1st _Neigh._ I came for that Intent, Neighbour. + +_Comp._ I thank you: well, I do not think but you'll all see me come off +with as smooth a Forehead, and make my Wife as honest a Woman as a Man +wou'd desire sometimes, I mean of her Rank; and a teeming Woman, as you +know she has been: Nay, I do not think but the Child too will be found +to be as lawful a Child as any Couple of unmarried People can beget. + +2d _Neigh._ We long to see it Neighbour _Compasse_, that so some of us +may do the like upon the same occasion. + +_Comp._ You're in the right, old Stitch of the World: But soft, see +where she comes with a whole Bundle of as good sound Maidens as her +self. + +_Enter_ Peg _new cloth'd, with three or four Women Neighbours._ + +Stand aside a little, and mind me I pray. + +_Omnes._ Agreed, agreed. + +_Comp._ Good Morrow fair Maid. + +_Peg._ In truth Sir you are mistaken in both, for I am neither fair, nor +yet a Maid. + +_Comp._ No, what are you then I pray, a Wife? + +_Peg._ That indeed I was, but alas,--I am now a Widow. + +_Comp._ A Widow say you? Nay then I must make bold with you; for look +you, your Case is somewhat like mine, I being a Husband without a Wife. + +1st _Neigh._ Aye neighbour, this is something like. + +_Pett._ They begin well, let them go on. + +_Comp._ How long have you been a Widow, good Woman? Nay pray do not weep +forsooth. + +_Peg._ I can't choose but cry, to think of the great Loss I had. + +_Comp._ Why, was he an honest Man? + +_Peg._ Honest quoth a', I vow and protest he was as honest a Man as e're +broke Bread. O I shall never have such another. + +[_Cries out._ + +_Comp._ By my Faith now Mistress you have had a great Loss indeed, for +an honest Man is not to be found every where, nor in every Street. + +_Pett._ The Rogue's witty. + +2d _Neigh._ Aye, aye, let 'em go on. + +_Comp._ And how long is it since you lost this honest Husband? + +_Peg._ O dear, his Memory is too fresh; and the Sight of you doubles my +Sorrow. + +_Comp._ The Sight of me, say you; why, was he so like me? + +_Peg._ As one Apple to another; your two Hands are not more alike. + +_Comp._ Nay then I cannot blame thee to weep: An honest Man he was I +warrant him; and you have had a mighty Loss, that's the Truth on't: But +was he proportioned like me, so well limb'd, and of such a wholesom +Complexion, heh! + +_Peg._ No Twins were ever more alike. + +_Comp._ Well I love, his Memory is still better and better: and how many +Children did he leave behind him? + +_Peg._ Only one, Sir. + +_Comp._ A Boy or a Girl? + +_Peg._ A dainty fine Boy, Sir. + +_Comp._ Just my own case still; my Wife (rest her Soul) left me a Boy +too, a lusty chopping Boy of his Age (as they tell me, for I never saw +it). + +_Peg._ So is mine. + +_Comp._ And what Profession was your Husband of? + +_Peg._ A Seaman. + +_Comp._ Heigh! my own Faculty too! And can you like a Man of that +Profession again? + +_Peg._ Yes surely, for his dear sake, whom I lov'd so tenderly, I shall +always esteem a Sailer. + +_Comp._ Shall you so? why then here's your Man: What say you, Is't a +Match? + +_Peg._ Dear me, I am so ashamed, and yet to speak the Truth, I do like +you hugely, and wou'd like you better still, if it were not for one +thing, which a little troubles me. + +_Comp._ What's that? + +_Peg._ Why, you know sometimes we are forc'd to endure the Absence of +our Husbands a long while, mehappen many Years, and then if there be any +Slip in us, (as long Vacations will make Lawyers hungry) the World is +apt to censure and scandalize us; and brand us with wanton Living and +Incontinency; when alas! if they wou'd but consider our Condition, and +the mighty Longings we often naturally have for Flesh and Blood, they +wou'd not blame us, so they wou'd not. + +_Comp._ Come, come, no Matter, canst thou love me, Widow? + +_Peg._ Ah, if I durst but speak my Mind, I know what I wou'd say. + +_Comp._ Durst, why who do you fear? here's none but an honest Gentleman, +some few Friends and Neighbours; let them hear a God's Name what you +wou'd say, and never blush for the Matter. + +1st _W. Neigh._ Aye, aye, speak Neighbour, pray speak your Mind, and +fear not. + +_Peg._ I shall be thought too weak to yield at first Sight. + +2d _W. Neigh._ Paw! paw! that's only Nicety. + +_Peg._ Well then I do love him dearly and dearly, so I do. + +[_Runs and kisses him_. + +_Comp._ And I thee with all my Heart and Soul. + +[Comp. _kisses_ Peg. + +Now we'll be merry, and have a Song, shall we not my Neighbours? + +3d _Neigh._ Marry will we, Neighbour _Luff_ and Mrs. Bride, will ye give +us a Song? + +_Peg._ With all my Heart, come Neighbour. + + A DIALOGUE. + + Man: + + _Faith and Troth I love thee dearly, + Tho I do but bluntly woo, + Prithy then resolve me clearly, + Whether I am beloved by you. + Long I shall not keep a pother, + Like a senseless whining Beau; + If you won't I'll court another + Who will never say me no._ + + Woman: + + _Friend, your self, nor Humour neither + With my Fancy disagree, + Yet I must find clearer Weather + Er'e I venture out to Sea. + Court another at your Pleasure + Win her in the Honey-moon, + She may chance repent at leisure, + For believing you too soon._ + + Man: + + _Leave your damn'd Fantastick Trials, + Which procure a Lover's Pain, + Pox upon these sham-Denials, + 'Tis but spending time in vain. + With Embraces happy make me, + Nature fram'd you to be kind; + Kiss me, and the Devil take me + If I ever change my Mind._ + + Woman: + + _I'll pursue the good old Fashion, + Practise still by those are wise, + Throughly try my Lover's Passion, + E're I let him grasp the Prize. + Spite of Oaths you wou'd forsake me, + Shou'd I let you once embrace: + If I kiss, the Devil take me, + Till the Parson has said Grace._ + + Chorus. + + _Since then Nation + Has made it a Fashion, + Let's send for a Black Coat, whilst we're in the Mind. + But it is damn'd Slavery, + And Priestly Knavery, + That Parsons must conjure e're Lovers be kind._ + +_Com._ So, so, here now shall we be Man and Wife again to Morrow, as +good as ever. What tho we met as Strangers, we may happen to love ne're +the worse for all that--Gentlemen and Neighbours, I invite ye all to my +Wedding. + +_Omnes._ We'l not fail you, and wish you Joy. + +_Com._ Did I not tell you that I would fetch it cleverly off? Let any +Man call me Cuckold if he dares now. + +_Petti._ 'Tis slander in him I assure you who-ever does. + +_Com._ Nay it will be _Petti Lacenary_ at least, and without Compass of +the General Pardon too: And for the Child, let me hear him that dares +say, I am not the Father. + +_Petti._ Sure none will dare dispute it. + +_Com._ Or that my Wife that is to be, is not as honest a Woman as some +other Mens Wives are. + +_Petti._ No question of that. + +_Com._ O how fine and smooth my Brows are now! + +_1 M. Neigh._ Aye but when you're married, they'll come to themselves +again I warrant ye. + +_Com._ My Friends, if you please, you may call me Mr. Bridegroom now, +for the Guests are all bidden to the Wedding. + +_1 M. Neigh._ We know it, Mr. Bridegroom, they are Indeed, and we'll not +fail you upon our Words. + +_Comp._ + + _Come then, brisk Widow, e're the next Ebb and Tide, + I'le be thy Bridegroom, and thou sha't be my Bride._ + +_Exeunt omnes._ + + +_The End of the Fourth ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Fifth. + + +_Enter_ Arabella _on one Side_. + +Summerfield _meeting her from the other_. + +_Ara._ Mr. _Summerfield_, I now am truly happy, my Prayers at last are +heard; and Heaven has restored my Husband to my Arms. + +_Sum._ I just now heard the joyful News, and thought to have been my +self the welcome Messenger of his Return, but find I'me come too late; +have you seen him? + +_Art._ No; as yet I have not. + +_Sum._ 'Tis somewhat strange! + +_Ara._ Others perhaps may judg it so, but my uncommon Joy for his +Return, admits no other Thought, but those of Transport for his Safety. + +_Sum._ O happy _Bonvile_! How I admire and wonder at thy Choice! + +_Enter_ Friendly. + +Madam, a Wife like you, exceeds the greatest Blessing sure on Earth. + +_Fr._ The nearest way to a secure Revenge, is private Malice, which, +like _Aside._ a Spark long lying hid amongst neglected Ashes, by the +least Blast of Wind becomes it self a Flame--Ha!, who have we here? +Thrice blest Occasion! which thus have offered me at once the Scope of +my revengeful Wishes. 'Tis _Arabella_ and her Darling _Summerfield_, one +who, in the Bridegroom's Absence, is grown thus intimate with his +beloved Bride. A strong Foundation on which I'll now erect a brave +Revenge; I'll step aside and observe them. + +[_Retires to one side of the Stage._ + +_Ara._ Sir, I hope he'll soon be here, and return the Kindness you have +shown me; so I take my leave, with hourly expectation of a much-long'd +for Husband. + +_Sum._ And I, with a Gratitude never to be forgotten, kiss your fair +Hand, and hope that all things will answer your Expectation. [_Exit_ +Arabella. + +_Fri._ Ay, 'tis so, now must I counterfeit a friendly Face to make a +farther Discovery. + +[_Aside._ + +Sir, your humble Servant: without Offence, may I be so bold as to beg +the Favour of your Name? + +_Sum._ The Question I must confess is somewhat familiar, and in my +Opinion improper for a Stranger at first sight; but yet I ne're disown'd +it to a Gentleman--'tis _Summerfield_. + +_Fri. Summerfield!_ Sir, I kiss your Hand;, and must congratulate your +good Success, but more admire your Valour. Had we many such noble +Commanders on board our Fleet, we need not fear it where e're it sails. + +_Sum._ Pray, Sir, stretch not your Love into Flattery, 'twill make me +then suspect your Kindness. And the Author of this Story was too much my +Friend I see, since he has given you this so very partial Account, the +more to augment my Fame. + +_Fri._ O! that's your Modesty, Sir: But if I might be so happy as to be +honour'd with your Acquaintance---- + +_Sum._ Sir, the Honour (if any) would be wholly on my Side; therefore I +desire to know your Name. + +_Fri._ _Friendly_, Sir. + +_Sum._ An Acquaintance; I suppose, of Mr. _Bonvile's_. + +_Fri._ One that thinks himself much honour'd in being stiled his Friend. + +_Sum._ I have often heard your Name indeed before; but till now Fortune +never afforded me the sight of you. + +_Fri._ You of all Men ought to bless Fortune, who still has been +indulgent to you on all Occasions; and scatter'd her Favours on you, +with as prodigal a Hand as tho you were her sole Care and only Minion. + +_Sum._ What mean you, Sir? Again you exceed the Bounds of Love and +Friendship; I never thought any of _Bonvil's_ Friends cou'd be guilty of +so base and vile a thing as Flattery: But, pray, unfold your meaning. + +_Fri._ 'Tis this; I just now saw you part with the Bride, with such +courteous Actions, as spoke no small Esteem in her kind Favour; and +therein I think you the happiest of Men. + +_Sum._ How! + +_Fri._ Mistake me not, I only as a Friend applaud your Happiness, bless +the Influence of your kinder Stars, and praise your Fortune that hath +given you this sweet Occasion. + +_Sum._ What Occasion, Sir? + +_Fri._ Of being serviceable to the fair Virgin Bride in her extreamest +need, after her being so unkindly left, nay, on her Wedding Day, by an +ungrateful Husband, in doing her those neglected Duties, her Youth and +Beauty justly did demand. + +_Sum._ On my Life some Plot against the Bride: I'll sound him 'till I +find the very Bottom--[_Aside._]--Sir, you are merry: But suppose the +Case your own, wou'd you have miss'd so tempting an Occasion? + +_Fri._ No, Sir, they're too precious to be omitted: But I hear you two +call Cousins, comes your Kindred by the _Merryman's_ or the _Bonvile's_? + +_Sum._ Neither! we were wholly Strangers 'till of late, and 'tis a word +of Courtesy only interchange'd between us for some private Reasons. + +_Fri._ This goes as I cou'd wish. [_Aside._] + +_Sum._ I desire you not to grow too inward with me, on so short an +Acquaintance: Not that I'de have you think the Lady of so base a +Disposition to grant me any thing beyond the Rules of Decency and +Honour. The only Favour I e're receiv'd from her, was a Present of those +Bracelets she wears about her Arms, and that Chain of Gold and Pearl she +has about her Neck; all which either of us may own without a Blush. + +_Fri._ How, the Chain and Bracelet, say you! Those were the first Tokens +of her Husband's Love. + +_Sum._ Methinks you look concern'd at what I've said; yet I have said no +more than what I am obliged in Honour to maintain, and will: therefore I +hope, as you'r a Gentleman, you'l not turn Informer. + +_Fri._ O pray think not so poorly of me. + +_Enter a Servant who whispers_ Summerfield. + +_Sum._ Tell her I'le wait on her immediately. + +[_Exit Servant._ + +Sir, some Business of Importance calls me hence; therefore some other +time I hope I shall have the Happiness of enjoying your Company longer. + +[_Exit_ Sum. + +_Fri._ Sir, your humble Servant. +Tell her I'll wait on her immediately, said he; this must be _Arabella_ +that he's going to: Better still. + + _The Work's begun, now I am made or lost; + He runs the best who holds out to the Post: + And all the Comfort in Adversity, + Is to see others as miserable as me._ + +Who have we here? Old _Merryman_! As I live 'tis he! + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman. + +_Mer._ O Master _Friendly,_ you're happily returned: But where's my +Son-in-Law? + +_Fri._ Alas, Sir, the unhappy _Bonvile_ is---- + +_Mer._ Is, is, what is he? Heh! speak; is he living, or is he dead; or +what's become of him? + +_Fri._ O! that I had the Marble _Niobes_ Heart! Or that I had suck'd the +Milk of Wolves and Tigers; so that I might have told, without the least +remorse of Sorrow, what now I dare not, nay, I cannot speak, for fear at +once I melt my self in Tears, and break your aged Heart. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Mer._ Then I suppose he's killed; say, is he not? Hast thou inticed him +from his Bride for this, thou inhumane Wretch? Yet speak, and tell me +truly, for I'm prepared to hear the worst of Ills; Is he then slain? + +_Fri._ No, Sir, but dangerously wounded. + +_Mer._ Not mortally, I hope; but whereabouts is he so desperately +wounded? In his Arms, his Legs, or Body? + +_Fri._ Neither, Sir, but in as perfect Health as when he left you. + +_Mer._ Strange! sure thou art all o're a Mystery, and form'st these +Riddles to try my Wit. + +_Fri._ No, Sir, for all I have said, you in effect will surely find I +told you he was wounded, did I not? + +_Mer._ Yes, you did. + +_Fri._ And so he is. + +_Mer._ But where, whereabout, I ask you once again? + +_Fri._ I see you force the unwilling Secret from me--Why, he's wounded. + +_Mer._ He's wounded, he's wounded, but where, where is he wounded? + +_Fri._ In his Fame, Honour and Reputation, more mortal than a thousand +fleshy Wounds. + + _For such slight Baubles, Cures are oft obtain'd; + But injur'd Honour ne're can be regain'd._ + +_Mer._ How! how! how's this? wounded in his Honour, fay'll thou? Tell me +the Villain that has defam'd him, and this good old Sword shall slit the +Rascal's Wind-pipe. + +_Fri._ O, Sir, your Daughter, your Daughter, Sir---- + +_Mer._ Ha! what's that? what's that? is she injur'd too? + +_Fri._ No, no Sir, my falling Tears quite drown my feeble Voice, I +cannot utter what I fain would speak--Your Daughter's false, false to +her _Bonvile_! And by the help of her beloved _Summerfield_, has robb'd +my Friend of all he cou'd call Dear, I mean his Fame. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Mer._ A Pox o' your Crocodile's Tears. Why, Sirrah, Sirrah, do you call +my Daughter Whore? Hey, Swords and Daggers, Blunderbusses and Pistols, +shall I bear this? Hark you, you my Friend, and no Friend, what a Kin do +you take me to be to this Gentlewoman, Heh? + +_Fri._ Her Father, Sir. + +_Mer._ Audacious Villain, O that I had thee in some private Corner, +where none you'd either see or hear us, this Sword shou'd justify my +Daughter's Honour; I'de Whore you with a Pox to you, so I wou'd. + +_Fri._ Your Pardon, Sir, I only did inform you as a Friend, that by your +fatherly Admonitions, you might refrain her from her undecent Course. + +_Mer._ Pox o' your friendly Intelligence. + +_Fri._ The Jewels which her Husband did present her, as the first Sign +and Confirmation of the happy Contract, she to my certain Knowledg has +given to---- + +_Mer._ To whom, to whom thou wicked Slanderer? tell me, Sarrah, quickly, +quick, quick. + +_Fri._ To _Summerfield_. + +_Mer._ Ha, ha, ha, the Fool makes me laugh; Ha, ha, ha, why 'twas but +just now that I saw e'm on her Neck and Arms. + +_Fri._ She was no Woman, had she not the Sense to get them against her +Husband's coming. + +_Mer._ But pray tell me, how is't possible that she cou'd part with 'em, +when they are lock't on, and the Key with her Husband? + +_Fri._ O, Sir, that's no Question to be ask'd in these Times: Women +_have found a way to make use of other Keys besides their Husbands: And +no doubt but_ Summerfield _has got a Key will open your Daughter's lock +as well as_ Bonvile's. + +_Mer._ Sirrah you lie, you lie Sirrah; and I'le tell thee thou ly's, +again and again, so I will. Nay, and I were to pay a 100 Pounds for +every Lie I give thee, as Men do Twelve-pence for every Oath they swear, +I wou'd spend all the Thousands I am worth, in giving thee the Lie. 'Tis +likely indeed, that such a brave Gentleman as _Summerfield_, that fought +at Sea like a Dragon to save my Life, should shorten my Days on Land in +ruining my Daughter; therefore once more I tell you you Lie. + +_Fri._ 'Tis very well. + +_Me._ Do you hear Sir, have you told this Lie to any body else but me? + +_Fri._ I am no Informer, Sir. + +_Mer._ Why then for fear you shou'd, do ye see, draw, [_Draws_] Draw, I +say, I am not so old but I can make a shift to cut your Throat still; +I'le spoil your Carking, I'le warrant ye. + +_Enter_ Bonvile _and_ Clara. + +A Pox on't, here's my Son-in-Law come to hinder me, Duce take him cou'd +he not stay a little longer? D'ye hear Sir, begon, leave this Place +immediately, or I'le--I'le--I'le--Gad I cou'd find in my Heart, so I +cou'd, but be gone. + +_Fri._ _Bonvile_ here with _Clara_ too, excellent. This goes to +_Arabella_, and may it encrease the Storm. + +[_Exit_ Frie. + +_Bon._ My Father in Anger. + +_Mer._ O Son, Son, Son! dear Boy, welcome home, Od's bobs you are. + +_Bon._ I humbly thank you, Sir; but am sorry to see you so disturb'd. + +_Mer._ Nothing, nothing, only Mr. _Friendly_ and I have had a Word or +two, that's all, that's all. + +_Bon._ About my going with him, I suppose; but that's past, and I hope, +Sir, you'l be so kind as at my Request to pardon him. + +_Mer._ Indeed Son it was something else; By the Lord _Harry_ I can't +forbear laughing at the Coxcomb, Ha, ha, ha; He told me, Ha, ha, ha, +that one _Summerfield_, a very honest Fellow as ever liv'd, is grown +exceeding familiar with my Daughter, your Wife. + +_Bon._ Ha! my Wife. + +_Mer._ Yes, your Wife, and that he had received Love-Tokens from her. + +_Bon._ How, Love-Token from her! + +_Mer._ Aye, aye, Love-Tokens I call'd 'em when I was a young Man: Nay, +the Rogue was so impudent to tell me, that she had given him those +Jewels which are lock'd about her Neck; Ha, ha, ha. + +_Bon._ The Jewels about her Neck, said you? + +_Mer._. Aye, what ails you Man that you change Colour so? 'Tis all a Lie +Boy I warrant thee: And hadst thou not come just in the Nick of Time, I +think o' my Conscience I shou'd have cut his Throat. + +_Bon._ As I will your Daughters if I find her false: Death, Hell, and +Furies, am I made a Monster already? + +_Cla._ What, Sir, are you return'd for this? + +_Mer._ Hark y' son, hark you; suppose that this Mr. _Friendly_ shou'd +have a secret Inclination to your spouse, d' ye see; and therefore, by +reason he can't obtain his Desire, possesses you with Jealousy to make a +Breach 'twixt you and your Wife. Od's bobs, I don't know, I can't tell +what shou'd be the meaning of his carrying you away on your Wedding-Day, +else, heh, Son, heh. + +_Cla._ Has the Italian Plague then infected you, that you stand thus +unmov'd? + +_Enter_ Summerfield _leading_ Arabella. + +But see here's your Bride. + +_Bon._ And her beloved Adulterer with her! Death and Damnation, must I +stand still and see this? + +_Mer._ Hey day! what the Matter now? + +_Ara._ _Bonvile_ here with _Clara_! Alas too true I find what before I +scarce dar'd to think was so. Is _Bonvile_ then a Traitor, and false to +_Arabella_? + +[_Aside._ + +_Cla._ Madam, at last I've found the pretious Jewel that you so long +have sought in vain. + +[To _Arab._ + +_Ara._ Wear it your self Madam, I lost it, and it must be mine no more. + +_Cla._ What means this sudden Alteration? + +_Mer._ Ods bodikins, as you say, what does she mean? Are ye both mad, +heh? + +_Sum._ Sir, I'm come to pay my Respects to you, and humbly beg a farther +Knowledg of----. + +_Bon._ Of whom, sweet Sir, my Wife or me? + +_Sum._ Ha! your Wife. + +_Bon._ Yes Sir, my Wife, I think the word needs no explaining. + +_Mer._ Pray, Sir, at my Request bear with him, he's strangely out of +Order I assure you. + +_Bon._ The Jewels are as I left 'em ; but the Jewel of her Heart is lost +and thrown away.--Madam, I sent you my Will, did you receive it. + +_Ara._ Yes, I did. + +_Bon._ Let me see it. + +_Ara._ You shall. + +[_Exit_ Ara. + +_Bon._ Sir, I desire a Word or two in private with you, + +[_to_ Summer. + +_Sum._ With all my Heart, Sir. + +_Mer._ What's that, what's that, I'll have no Whispering, Gentlemen. + +_Enter_ Arabella _with the Will._ + +_Ara._ There's your Will, Sir. + +[_Throws it down,_ Bonvile _takes it up._ + +_Bon._ 'Tis well now as you've chang'd your Mind, I'll change this too, +and find another to supply your Place: There's no harm done, the +Marriage is not yet consummated, and you are free to enjoy any, so am I. + +_Ara._ As you please for that: A Man may make a Garment for the Moon, +count all the Stars which twinckle in the Skies, or empty the vast +Ocean, Drop by Drop, sooner than please a Mind so light, so various as +yours. + +_Mer._ Ods bobs, what's this you talk of, altering your Will? + +_Bon._ Yes, Sir, I am so resolved, and will see 't perform'd within this +Hour: My Lawyer lives hard by, and so farewel. + +[_Exit. Bon._ + +_Mer._ Farewel thou peevish Boy, I can alter my Will too so I can, marry +can I; I had left him 20000 Pound after my Death, and he shall see I can +find another Executor too. Within this Hour did he say, Gad I'll be with +one as soon as he, unless he rides Post to the Devil, and that's the +nearest way to a Lawyer. + +_Sum._ I'll follow him, and asswage his Passion. + +_Mer._ By no means, Sir.--But now I think on't, I'll go with you, and +find him out: But did you ever see the like, did you ever see the like? +Come Sir, come follow me + +[_Exit._ Merr. & Summer. + +_Cla._ Dear _Arabella_ what can all this mean? + +_Ara._ Can you be doubtful of the Effect, who are your self the Cause? + +_Cla._ I the Cause, Inform me how? + +_Ara._ O _Clara, Clara_, your Syrens Voice has drawn my _Bonvile_ from +these spotless Virgins Arms, and made me ever wretched! + +_Cla._ Who (if thou ever lov'dst me) tax'd me with a Crime so foul, as I +abhor to hear it only named? + +_Ara._ _Friendly._. + +_Cla._ O _Arabella_, forgive and pity me, who am indeed the innocent, +unhappy Cause of all those Griefs which now afflict you both; which I'll +relate in brief, if you will please to withdraw one Moment with me. + +_Ara._ With all my Heart. + +_Cla._ Come then: + + _And since your Ruine I did first conspire, + I'll all appease, thus Fire's expell'd by Fire._ + +[_Exeunt._ + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman _and_ Summerfield. + +_Mer._ Sir, do you take me for your Friend? + +_Sum._ Why d' you ask me such a Question, Sir? 'twere base Ingratitude +to entertain any other Thought. + +_Mer._ Why then d' ye see, Sir; as you are my Friend, you must not fight +my Son _Bonvile_. + +_Sum._ Not fight him Sir! you amaze me. + +_Mer._ Aye, aye, aye; that's all one: I understand your dumb Signs and +your low Whispers, the French Mode all over, to smile and grin a Man in +the Face, and at the same time privately cut his Throat. Therefore +prithe be ruled by me, and don't fight him, for shou'd you kill him, my +poor Girl wou'd break her Heart, quite break her Heart. [_Sobs and +cries._] I grant that you are wrong'd, and so I dare swear is my dear +Child: but he's her Husband, and must be born with, ods bobs he must. + +_Sum._ Heaven be my Witness, I ne're entertain'd a Thought like it! + +_Mer._ That's well, that's well, I am heartily glad on't, ods bobs I am +heartily glad. + +[Enter _Friendly_. + +But here comes one that has made all this Mischief; and him I'll fight +my self for all I'm a Justice of the Peace. Come, come, Sir, Draw, draw; +you'll belie my Daughter again wil you? Come, draw, I say, Draw. + +[_Draws._ + +_Fri._ Sir, as I am a Gentleman, I scorn to deny my Words, but there's +my Author, whether good or ill. + +_Mer._ Who, he? He, do ye mean him? + +_Fri._ Yes, Sir. + +_Sum._ True, Sir, I am; For, at his Return to Town from _Barn-Elms_, it +was my Chance to meet him; and after a ceremonious Complement or two, I +found him diving into my private Thoughts concerning the Bride your +Daughter: I, not to be behind-hand with him, join'd Wit with Wit to +sound his shallow Soul. I told him then, how her Jewels once were mine; +but the manner of my obtaining them, I for my own sake did conceal from +him; and now, if you're disposed, I'll here relate it. + +_Enter_ Bonvile _leading_ Arabella, Clara _and_ Spruce, _Mr._ Venter +_and Mrs._ Venter. + +_Mer._ Let it be before all this Company then: What, and my Son and +Daughter too so loving again? Nay then all's well, ods bobs it is, and +they shall hear it, ods bobs they shall. + +_Bon._ I have heard the Story, Sir, already; and _Friendly_, you I +pardon too, for Enemies in War take all Occasions to undo each other; +yet tho I am your Enemy, I'll be generous still, and make you Master of +your wish'd for Mistress. + +[_To_ Clara.] + +Come, Madam, receive this worthier Passion of your _Friendly_, whom I +know you both admire and love. + +[_Gives her to_ Friendly. + +Next I must obtain your Pardon for my Rashness. + +_Sum._ Sir, 'tis what I first ought to have begg'd of you: And that the +World may'nt tax this innocent Lady of a Crime to her purest Thoughts +unknown, I'll here begin my Story from my first Acquaintance to this +happy Hour. + +_Mer._ Prithy do. + +_Sum._ The first time that I e're beheld her Face, I wou'd have robb'd +her. + +_Mer._ Ah Rogue! What, a Thief, a Thief, what wou'd you have robb'd her +of? + +_Sum._ Not her Honour, I assure you, Sir, but only of those Jewels which +she wears. + +_Mer._ Ods bobs, thou wert an honest Thief, for that I faith he was. + +_Sum._ They being fast, I cou'd not get 'em off without some Harm and +Pain to her: which for the _Indies_ I'd not have done. And she, in +answer to my Civility, brought me home, and ransom'd them with the full +Price in Gold, (with which I made my Venture) and the more to hide my +Shame, she honour'd me with the Title of her Kinsman. + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, and so she might well; for she was a little cunning Thief +too, to steal the Gold she gave you from her Husband; 'twas all his now, +but that's no matter, proceed. + +_Sum._ The rest you know already, Sir. + +_Mer._ Ay, so I do, ods bobs I do, thy Valour my brave Boy, thy Valour, +for which I'll do for thee, that thou shalt never need to rob again I +warrant thee; ods bobs I will. But come, come, we lose time, for we have +another Wedding yet to be perform'd, but that shall be done within. + + Sum. _Then farewel all ye treacherous Paths of Vice, + Which lead Men blindfold to their End, + In time like me repent you that are wise, + And by Restraint your vicious Courses end._ + + Ara. _Were I to ask of Heaven its greatest Bliss + On Earth, it cou'd bestow not one like this. + After a Storm the Sun still shines most bright, + And from the Chaos sprung the purer Light._ + + Bon. _A Day like this sure yet has never been, + Wherein such various Changes e're were seen. + Fortune to Day that work'd my Overthrow, + Has made me happy in a Minute now. + Bless'd with a vertuous Wife my Days I'll spend, + And ne're trust Man, lest I mistake my Friend._ + + + + +EPILOGUE, + +Spoke by the City-Bride. + + + _You met with good Intention to be witty, + And rally the Grave Cuckolds of the City; + But disappointed of your Recreation, + I in your Looks can read the Play's Damnation. + Lord! how ye stare to find an honest Bride, + A thing you think a Monster in_ Cheapside. + _Whither you boast that you so often come, + And leave your footmen to perform at home. + Yet 'tis no little Comfort t' us howe're, + You oftner bring th' Estate than get the Heir. + Unjustly therefore you your Fortune blame, + She's kinder to your Blood that to your Name._ + + _After all this, I know you think it Pity, + That I shou'd break the Custom of the City: + I hear a Beau cry, 'tis some damn'd Mistaker; + A_ Cheap-side _Vertue, City Cuckold maker. + This is a Fault no Gentleman can pardon, + It gives_ Cheapside _the Sins of_ Covent-Garden: + _We must refine on Vice, and take new Measures, + Since dull chain'd Cits invade our darling Pleasures._ + + _Take my Advice, employ at home your Backs, + Or_ Locket's _Revels may revenge_ Pontack's: + _This Cuckolding to you's a losing Trade, + That pay for making, and for being made. + The Ladies will my Character excuse, + And not condemn a Vertue which they use._ + + _If any here be guilty of Transgression, + 'Tis of Necessity, not Inclination: + They'd be contented in their proper Houses, + Cou'd they reform their unperforming Spouses. + Yet if some wanton Appetites there be, + How many are there that can fast like me. + Those are enow, if I have their Applause, + The Poet has his End, and I my Cause. + + +FINIS. + + + + +PUBLICATIONS OF THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY + + +FIRST YEAR (1946-47) + +Numbers 1-4 out of print. + +5. Samuel Wesley's _Epistle to a Friend Concerning Poetry_ (1700) and +_Essay on Heroic Poetry_ (1693). + +6. _Representation of the Impiety and Immorality of the Stage_ (1704) +and _Some Thoughts Concerning the Stage_ (1704). + + +SECOND YEAR (1947-1948) + +7. John Gay's _The Present State of Wit_ (1711); and a section on Wit +from _The English Theophrastus_ (1702). + +8. Rapin's _De Carmine Pastorali_, translated by Creech (1684). + +9. T. Hanmer's (?) _Some Remarks on the Tragedy of Hamlet_ (1736). + +10. Corbyn Morris' _Essay towards Fixing the True Standards of Wit, +etc._ (1744). + +11. Thomas Purney's _Discourse on the Pastoral_ (1717). + +12. Essays on the Stage, selected, with an Introduction by Joseph Wood +Krutch. + + +THIRD YEAR (1948-1949) + +13. Sir John Falstaff (pseud.), _The Theatre_ (1720). + +14. Edward Moore's _The Gamester_ (1753). + +15. John Oldmixon's _Reflections on Dr. Swift's Letter to Harley_ +(1712); and Arthur Mainwaring's _The British Academy_ ( 1712). + +16. Nevil Payne's _Fatal Jealousy_ (1673). + +17. Nicholas Rowe's _Some Account of the Life of Mr. William +Shakespeare_ (1709). + +18. "Of Genius," in _The Occasional Paper_, Vol. III, No. 10 (1719); and +Aaron Hill's Preface to _The Creation_ (1720). + + +FOURTH YEAR (1949-1950) + +19. Susanna Centlivre's _The Busie Body_ (1709). + +20. Lewis Theobold's _Preface to The Works of Shakespeare_ (1734). + +21. _Critical Remarks on Sir Charles Grandison, Clarissa, and Pamela_ +(1754). + +22. Samuel Johnson's _The Vanity of Human Wishes_ (1749) and Two +_Rambler_ papers (1750). + +23. John Dryden's _His Majesties Declaration Defended_ (1681). + +24. Pierre Nicole's _An Essay on True and Apparent Beauty in Which from +Settled Principles is Rendered the Grounds for Choosing and Rejecting +Epigrams_, translated by J. V. Cunningham. + + +FIFTH YEAR (1950-51) + +25. Thomas Baker's _The Fine Lady's Airs_ (1709). + +26. Charles Macklin's _The Man of the World_ (1792). + +27. Frances Reynolds' _An Enquiry Concerning the Principles of Taste, +and of the Origin of Our Ideas of Beauty, etc._ (1785). + +28. John Evelyn's _An Apologie for the Royal Party_ (1659); and _A +Panegyric to Charles the Second_ (1661). + +29. Daniel Defoe's _A Vindication of the Press_ (1718). + +30. Essays on Taste from John Gilbert Cooper's _Letters Concerning +Taste_, 3rd edition (1757), & John Armstrong's _Miscellanies_ (1770). + + +SIXTH YEAR (1951-1952) + +31. Thomas Gray's _An Elegy Wrote in a Country Church Yard_ (1751); and +_The Eton College Manuscript._ + +32. Prefaces to Fiction; Georges de Scudery's Preface to _Ibrahim_ +(1674), etc. + +33. Henry Gally's _A Critical Essay_ on Characteristic-Writings (1725). + +34. Thomas Tyers' A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson (1785). + + + + +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library: University of California + +THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY + +_General Editors_ + +H. RICHARD ARCHER William Andrews Clark Memorial Library + +E.N. HOOKER University of California, Los Angeles + +R.C. BOYS University of Michigan + +JOHN LOFTIS University of California, Los Angeles + +The Society exists to make available inexpensive reprints (usually +facsimile reproductions) of rare seventeenth and eighteenth century +works. The editorial policy of the Society continues unchanged. As in +the past, the editors welcome suggestions concerning publications. All +income of the Society is devoted to defraying cost of publication and +mailing. + +All correspondence concerning subscriptions in the United States and +Canada should be addressed to the William Andrews Clark Memorial +Library, 2205 West Adams Boulevard, Los Angeles 18, California. +Correspondence concerning editorial matters may be addressed to any of +the general editors. The membership fee is $3.00 a year for subscribers +in the United States and Canada and 15/- for subscribers in Great +Britain and Europe. British and European subscribers should address +B. H. Blackwell, Broad Street, Oxford, England. + + +Publications for the sixth year [1951-1952] + +(At least six items, most of them from the following list, will be +reprinted.) + +THOMAS GRAY: _An Elegy Writt in a Country Church Yard_ (1751). +Introduction by George Sherburn. + +JAMES BOSWELL, ANDREW ERSKINE, and GEORGE DEMPSTER: _Critical Strictures +on the New Tragedy of Elvira_ (1763). Introduction by Frederick A. +Pottle. + +_An Essay on the New Species of Writing Founded by Mr. Fielding_ (1751). +Introduction by James A. Work. + +HENRY GALLY: _A Critical Essay on Characteristic Writing_ (1725). +Introduction by Alexander Chorney. + +[JOHN PHILLIPS]: _Satyr Against Hypocrits_ (1655). Introduction by Leon +Howard. + +_Prefaces to Fiction._ Selected and with an Introduction by Benjamin +Boyce. + +THOMAS TYERS: _A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson_ ([1785]). +Introduction by Gerald Dennis Meyer. + +Publications for the first five years (with the exception of NOS. 1-4, +which are out of print) are available at the rate of $3.00 a year. +Prices for individual numbers may be obtained by writing to the Society. + + +THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY +_WILLIAM ANDREWS CLARK MEMORIAL LIBRARY_ +2205 WEST ADAMS BOULEVARD, LOS ANGELES 18, CALIFORNIA + +Make check or money order payable to THE REGENTS OF THE UNIVERSITY OF +CALIFORNIA. + + + +--------------------------------------------------------------+ + | Transcriber's Notes & Errata | + | | + | Spellings of names, abbreviations and a number of other | + | words, punctuation including the use of apostrophes, use of | + | accents, hyphenation and italicisation are very inconsistent | + | in the text. They have been transcribed as in the text, | + | except for very obvious typographical errors. | + | | + | In the Preface, the underlined words have been represented | + | as italicised words. | + | | + | Superscripts in the Preface have been preceded by carat | + | characters. | + | | + | Embedded stage directions in the text have been left in | + | situ, enclosed in square brackets. | + | | + | End-of-line and centred stage directions in the text have | + | been placed on their own lines. | + | | + | The following words occur in both hyphenated and | + | unhyphenated forms in the text. The number of instances of | + | each word are given in parentheses. | + | | + | |Cheap-side (1) |Cheapside (2) | | + | |Hoo-ra (2) |Hoora (3) | | + | |me-thinks (2) |methinks (4) | | + | |Merry-man (2) |Merryman (10) | | + | |who-ever (1) |whoever (1) | | + | | + | The following obvious typographical errors have been | + | corrected. | + | | + | |Error |Correction | | + | |is is |is | | + | |wihin |within | | + | |the |thee | | + | |the the |the | | + | |Names |Name | | + | |Speaker's name omitted. |Fri. | | + | |Salvage |Savage | | + | | + +--------------------------------------------------------------+ + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The City Bride (1696), by Joseph Harris + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + +***** This file should be named 22974.txt or 22974.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/2/9/7/22974/ + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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