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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/22974-8.txt b/22974-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..5a5310d --- /dev/null +++ b/22974-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,4001 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The City Bride (1696), by Joseph Harris + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The City Bride (1696) + Or The Merry Cuckold + +Author: Joseph Harris + +Commentator: Vinton A. Dearing + +Release Date: October 12, 2007 [EBook #22974] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + + + + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + + + +The Augustan Reprint Society + +JOSEPH HARRIS + +_The City Bride_ + +(1696) + +With an Introduction by +Vinton A. Dearing + +Publication Number 36 + +Los Angeles +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library +University of California +1952 + + +GENERAL EDITORS + +H. RICHARD ARCHER, _Clark Memorial Library_ +RICHARD C. BOYS, _University of Michigan_ +ROBERT S. KINSMAN, _University of California, Los Angeles_ +JOHN LOFTIS, _University of California, Los Angeles_ + + +ASSISTANT EDITOR + +W. EARL BRITTON, _University of Michigan_ + + +ADVISORY EDITORS + +EMMETT L. AVERY, _State College of Washington_ +BENJAMIN BOYCE, _Duke University_ +LOUIS BREDVOLD, _University of Michigan_ +JAMES L. CLIFFORD, _Columbia University_ +ARTHUR FRIEDMAN, _University of Chicago_ +EDWARD NILES HOOKER, _University of California, Los Angeles_ +LOUIS A. LANDA, _Princeton University_ +SAMUEL H. MONK, _University of Minnesota_ +ERNEST MOSSNER, _University of Texas_ +JAMES SUTHERLAND, _University College, London_ +H. T. SWEDENBERG, JR., _University of California, Los Angeles_ + + +CORRESPONDING SECRETARY + +EDNA C. DAVIS, _Clark Memorial Library_ + + + + +INTRODUCTION + + +_The City Bride_, by Joseph Harris, is of special interest as the only +adaptation from the canon of John Webster to have come upon the stage in +the Restoration. Nahum Tate's _Injur'd Love: or, The Cruel Husband_ is +an adaptation of _The White Devil_, but it was never acted and was not +printed until 1707. _The City Bride_ is taken from _A Cure for a +Cuckold_, in which William Rowley and perhaps Thomas Heywood +collaborated with Webster. F. L. Lucas, Webster's most recent and most +scholarly editor, remarks that _A Cure for a Cuckold_ is one of the +better specimens of Post-Elizabethan romantic comedy. In particular, the +character of the bride, Annabel (Arabella in Harris's adaptation), has a +universal appeal. _The City Bride_, a very close copy of its original, +retains its virtues, and has some additional virtues of its own. + +Not much is known of its author, Joseph Harris. Genest first notices him +as playing Bourcher, the companion of a French pirate, in _A +Common-Wealth of Women_. Thomas Durfey's alteration of _The Sea Voyage_ +from the Beaumont and Fletcher folio, which was produced about September +1685. His subsequent roles were of a similar calibre, but if he never +rose to be a star he seems to have become a valued supporting player, +for in 1692 he was chosen to join the royal "comedians in ordinary." He +did not at first side with Thomas Betterton in his quarrel with the +patentees of the theatre in 1694-5, but he withdrew with him to +Lincoln's Inn Fields. Genest notices him for the last time as playing +Sir Richard Vernon in Betterton's adaptation of _1 Henry IV_, which was +produced about April 1700. + +During his career on the stage Harris found time to compose a +tragi-comedy, _The Mistakes, or, The False Report_ (1691), produced in +December 1690; _The City Bride_, produced in 1696; and a comedy and a +masque, _Love's a Lottery, and a Woman the Prize. With a New Masque, +call'd Love and Riches Reconcil'd_ (1699), produced about March 1698/9. +_The Mistakes_ is clearly apprentice work, for Harris acknowledges in a +preface the considerable help of William Mountfort, who took the part of +the villain, Ricardo. Mountfort, who had already written three plays +himself, cut one of the scenes intended for the fifth act and inserted +one of his own composition (probably the last) which not only clarified +the plot but also elevated the character of the part he was to play. The +company seems to have done its best by the budding dramatist, for Dryden +wrote the prologue, a rather unusual one in prose and verse, and Tate +supplied the epilogue. Harris professed himself satisfied with the +play's reception, but owned that it was Mountfort's acting which really +carried it off. + +_The City Bride_, on the other hand, shows its author completely +self-assured, and rightly so. No doubt some of his ease comes from the +fact that he had nothing to invent, but in large part it must derive +from his ten-years' experience on the stage. Harris added nothing to the +plot of _The City Bride_, although he commendably shifted its emphasis, +as his title makes clear, from infidelity to fidelity; but he rewrote +the dialogue almost completely, and the new dialogue is remarkable good. +The reader will notice that it is, except for the last half of the first +act, printed as prose. The quarto of _A Cure for a Cuckold_, from which +Harris worked, is also largely printed as prose, but has correct verse +lineation in the same portion of the first act. It is the more +remarkable that Harris, following thus closely the apparent form of his +original, could vary from it so successfully. Most notable, probably, +are the passages in which he intensified the expression of his source. +They may indicate no more than the eternal "ham" in our author; but I +think they probably indicate as well a new style of acting, more +rhetorical in one way, more natural in another. A good example, in which +the new rhetoric is not oppressive, is the account of the sea fight at +the end of Act III. Even when Harris followed his original most closely, +we seem to hear the actor, speaking in a new tongue, in a more relaxed +and colloquial rhythm. The reader will find it both amusing and +instructive to compare the two versions of Act II, scene ii. The new +cadences do more than merely prove that Harris had no ear for blank +verse. + +_The City Bride_ does not conform to the dominant type of Restoration +comedy, but it belongs to a thriving tradition. Domestic comedy, in +adaptations from the Elizabethans, had been staged at intervals for +twenty years before _The City Bride_ appeared, and the type was of +course destined to supplant gay comedy in the near future. Harris was +not, therefore, going against the taste of the town; on the contrary he +was regularly guided by contemporary taste and practice. His stage is +less crowded: he amalgamated the four gallants of _A Cure for a Cuckold_ +in the person of Mr. Spruce, at the expense of a dramatic scene (I, ii, +31-125); and he ended the sub-plot with the fourth act instead of +bringing its persons into the final scene, with some loss of liveliness +and a concomitant gain in unity of effect. He modernized his dialogue +entirely, bringing up to date the usage and allusions of his original, +and restraining the richness of its metaphor by removing the figures +altogether or by substituting others more familiar. He omitted a good +deal of bawdry, especially in Act II, scene ii. All these changes have +parallels in other Restoration adaptations. Again, the songs and dances, +which are all of Harris's composition, reflect the demand of the +Restoration audience for excitement, variety, novelty, in their dramatic +fare. When in Act III, scene i, Harris meets this demand by making +Bonvile bare his breast to Friendly's sword, and Friendly a little later +grovel at Bonvile's feet for pardon, we may condemn the new business as +bathetic; but when in Act IV, scene i, he substitutes for Webster's +emaciated jokes the bustle of drawers, the sound of the bar bell, and +healths all around, we can only applaud the change. + +We must also commend Harris for supplying a consistent and relatively +believable motivation for the main action. In both _A Cure for a +Cuckold_ and _The City Bride_, Clare (Clara) begins the action by giving +her suitor, Lessingham (Friendly), a cryptic message: he is to determine +who his best friend is and kill him. In _A Cure for a Cuckold_, it is +never made clear whether the victim should have been Bonvile or Clare +herself (she apparently intended to trick Lessingham into poisoning +her). This uncertainty has only recently been noticed by students of the +drama, who have been forced to emend the text at IV, ii, 165 (see +Lucas's note on the passage). Harris's solution is simpler. He will have +nothing to do with either murder or suicide. Clara explains to Friendly +that the best friend of a lover is love itself. + +This is not the place to enumerate all the differences between _A Cure +for a Cuckold_ and _The City Bride_; indeed the reader may prefer making +the comparisons for himself. Harris's alterations follow the general +pattern of Restoration adaptations from the earlier drama, it is true. +On the other hand, a relatively small number of such plays allow us to +see the professional actor feeling his way through the emotions and +actions of the scenes. To compare a play like _The City Bride_ with its +source is like visiting the rehearsals of an acting company of the time. +Such a play has an immediacy and liveness that strongly appeals to those +who delight to image forth the past. + +_The City Bride_ has never been reprinted. The present edition +reproduces, with permission, the copy in the Henry E. Huntington +Library, omitting Harris's signed dedication to Sir John Walter, Bart., +on A2^r-A3^r (A1^v in the original is blank). The top line on page 44, +which is partly cut away, reads: _Cla._ Who (if thou ever lov'dst me ... + +Vinton A. Dearing +University of California +Los Angeles + + + + +THE CITY BRIDE: + +OR, + +The Merry Cuckold. + +A COMEDY, + +Acted at the New Theatre, in _Little +Lincolns Inn-Fields._ + +BY + +His Majesty's Servants. + +_First Edition._ + +_Spero Meliora._ + +LONDON: + +Printed for _A. Roper_ and _E. Wilkinson_ at the _Black-Boy_, and R. +_Clavel_ at the _Peacock_, in _Fleet-street_. 1696. + + + + +PROLOGUE: + +_Spoke by Mr._ THURMOND. + + + _Three Ways there are, and all accounted fair, + To gain your Favour: Begging, Borrowing, Prayer. + If as a Beggar, I your Alms implore } + Methinks your Charity shou'd aid the Poor; } + Besides, I never beg'd of you before. } + If I address by Prayer, and loud Complaints + I then oblige yee, for I make you Saints; + And sure none here can think it Superstition, + To pray to Saints that are of no Religion! + If Invocation will not do my Work, + A Man may borrow of a_ Jew _or_ Turk; + _Pray lend me Gentlemen your Applause and Praise, + I'll take it for as good as Currant Bays; + And if I ne're repay it, 'tis no more, + Than many of you Sparks have done before: + With this distinction, that you ran indebt + For want of Money, we for want of Wit. + In vain I plead! a Man as soon may get + Mill'd Silver, as one favour from the Pit. + ----Hold then----now I think on't, + I'll e'en turn Thief, and steal your kind Affection, + And when I've got your Hearts, claim your protection: + You can't convict me sure for such a crime, + Since neither Mare nor Lap-dog, I purloin: + While you Rob Ladies Bosoms every day, } + And filch their pretious Maiden-heads away; } + I'll plead good nature for this Brat the Play: } + A Play that plagues no more the thread-bare Theme + Of powder'd Beaux, or tricks o'th' Godly Dame, + But in your humours let's ye all alone, + And not so much as Fools themselves runs down. + Our Author try'd his best, and Wisemen tell, + 'Tis half well doing to endeavour well: + What tho' his poor Allay runs not so fine; + Yet, let it pass as does our present Coin; + For wanting fairer Ore, and riches mould + He stamps in Brass, what others print in Gold: + Smile on him but this time, the next perhaps, + If he guess right he may deserve your Claps._ + + + + +Dramatis Personæ. + + + |Bonvile, _The Bridegroom_. |_Mr._ Boman. | + |Friendly, _His Friend, in Love with_ Clara. |_Mr._ Thurmond. | + |Justice Merryman, _Father to_ Arabella. |_Mr._ Bright. | + |Summerfield, _A Gentleman, but Younger Brother, | | + | necessitated to take the High-Way_. |_Mr._ Scudemore.| + |_Mr._ Ventre, _A Merchant._ |_Mr._ Arnold. | + |_Mr._ Spruce, _A City Beau._ |_Mr._ Bayly. | + |Compasse, _A Master of a Vessel._ |_Mr._ Freeman. | + |A Councellor. |_Mr._ Davis. | + |Pettifog, } |_Mr._ Trefusis. | + | } _Two Attorneys._ | | + |Dodge, } |_Mr._ Eldred. | + | | | + |_Sailers, Neighbours, Drawers, Servants, Boys, | | + | Singers and Dancers._ | | + | | | + |Arabella, _The Bride_. |_Mrs._ Boman. | + |Clara, _Friendly's Mistriss, but secretly in Love | | + | with_ Bonvile. |_Mrs._ Boutell. | + |_Mrs._ Ventre, _The Merchant's Wife_. |_Mrs._ Lacy. | + |Peg, _Compasses Wife_. |_Mrs._ Perin. | + |Nurse. |_Mrs._ Lawson. | + |Lucy, Clara's _Maid_. |_Miss_ Prince. | + | | | + |_Women Neighbours._ | | + + +SCENE _London_. + + + + +THE CITY BRIDE: +OR, THE +Merry Cuckold. + + + + +ACT I. SCENE the I. + + _The Curtain draws up, and discovers several sitting at a Banquet. + An Entertainment of Instrumental Musick, Compos'd by Signior_ + Finger: _Then a Song, set by Mr._ John Eccles, _and Sung by Young_ + La Roche. + +SONG. + + _Many I've lik'd, and some Enjoy'd, + But if I said I Lov'd, I ly'd. + Inconstant as the wandring Bee, + From once touch'd Sweets I us'd to flee; + Nor all the Power of Female Skill, + Cou'd curb the freedom of my Will:_ + Clarinda _only found the Art, + To Conquer and so keep my Heart._ + +[_After this a Dance, and then the Scene shuts._ + +Enter_ Friendly _and_ Clara. + +_Friend._ This is a Day of Mirth and Jollity my _Clara_. + +_Clara._ 'Tis so, for such as can be merry, Mr. _Friendly_. + +_Friend._ Why not for us my Love, we have a Noble President, and +methinks shou'd Imitate (thrô Envy) this their happiness. + +_Clara._ I am not of your Opinion. + +_Friend._ Why not my Fair? + +_Clara._ I'll tell you, because I purpose not to Marry. + +_Fri._ Prithee be serious, and reform that Thought: Think of my past +Service, and judge by that my future; weigh all the respect I have paid +you long, and ever lov'd you beyond my self. + +_Cla._ I know your Weakness, and will reward it too. + +_Fri._ I am sure you will, you must be kind; And can you think an Answer +of this killing Nature, a just return for all my faithful Love? + +_Cla._ As to that I have already said. + +_Fri._ Oh speak, from whence this Coldness doth arise! Be at least so +kind as to tell me that; Is it some late Disgust you have conceived of +my Person; or rather your desire, (I fear) of some unworthier, happy +Creature, base in the Attempt, as you unkind in thinking of a Change; if +neither. + + _I must impute it to your Woman's Will, + Still pleased with what it fancies, Good or Ill._ + +_Cla._ Be't what it will, thus it is, and with this Answer pray rest +satisfied; there is but one way ever to win me and draw me unto +Marriage, which whosoever finds, 'tis like he may have me, if not, I am +still my own. + +_Fri._ Oh name it then! Thou dearest Treasure of my Life! my Soul! my +All! I am in a maze of Extasie, to think there's any means to gain you, +and hope you'l be so kind to tell me how I may be happy. + +_Cla._ I'll retire a while; and with my self resolve what must be done, +and in the end send you my Resolution. + +[_Exit_ Clara. + +_Fri._ I'll here expect it: What more can I desire, than now be +satisfied and know my Dooom. + + _Suspence is the worst Torment we endure, + 'Tis Knowledge make the Wound both safe and sure._ + +_Enter_ Spruce _and_ _Mr._ Venter. + +_Spru._ How now _Jack_! What all alone Man? + +_Fri._ No, for I have heard some say, Men are ne're less alone, then +when alone. The reason I suppose is this, because they have Crowds of +Thoughts, that still perplex the Mind; which wou'd be, like the Soul +retired and free, thereby to enjoy that sweet repose, which nought but +that can Grant. + +_Spru._ Pshaw! Pox of this Morality and dull Stuff; Prithee let us be +Merry, and Entertain the Bride and Bridegroom. Ods fish there a parcel +of rare Creatures within! But of all Mrs. _Clara_ for my Money. + +_Mr. Ven._ And truly, I am of your Opinion Mr. _Spruce_; for setting +aside her present Melancholly and Discontent, I think she is beyond +Comparison with any other. + +_Spr._ Od's nigs, I know the Cause of her Disorder. + +_Ven._ What I pray? + +_Spr._ Why, I'll tell ye; In all Conditions of Estates, Professions, and +Degrees, in Arts or Sciences, yee know there's a kind of Envious +Emulation. + +_Mr. Ven._ Right. + +_Spr._ So in this of _Arabella_'s Marrying; for _Clara_ being Lady of +much the same Birth and Quality, Grieves I--suppose to see her Rival get +the start of her. + +_Mr. Ven._ Troth like enough. + +_Fri._ Y'are Pleasant Gentlemen--Or else because she having had so many +Courtiers---- + +_Spr._ And you among the rest _Jack_. + +_Fri._ She now perhaps does cast a more favourable Eye upon some one +that does not like her. + +_Spr._ Why Faith, and that may be too. + +_Enter_ Lucy _with a Letter._ + +_Lucy._ Sir, my Mistriss presents her humble Service to you, and has +sent you this Letter; pray Heaven it be to your liking Sir. + +_Fri._ I thank the kind _Lucy_: There, there's for the Postage Girle: +[_Gives her Money._] She has kept her Promise for once I see; I'm +resolved to read it, thô I were sure my Death was Comprehended in it. + + Reads. _Try all your Friends, and find out the best and nearest to + your Heart, That done, be sure to kill him for my sake. This fail + not to do, if you respect and Love (as you pretend.)_ + + Clara. + +'Tis as I fear'd, and what I know she most desires: Mischief, and +Murder, are all her Sexes Practice, and Delight? Yet such is the +Extravagancy of my Passion, I must obey the Mandate, thô to my certain +Ruine: 'Tis strangely difficult, and does require Mature Deliberation. + +[_Exit._ + +_Spr._ What has _Friendly_ left us? + +_Mr. Ven._ I believe the Letter was the occasion, it may be it was a +Challenge. + +_Spr._ A Challenge! No, no; Women don't use to bring Challenges, I +rather believe 'tis an Amour; And that Letter as you call it a _Billet +Deux_, which is to Conduct him to the place appointed; and in some Sence +you may take that for a Challenge. + +_Mr. Ven._ And she the Civil Embassadress to usher him in. + +_Spr._ Yes, yes, but see the Bride and Bridegroom, with the rest of the +good Company. + +_Enter Justice_ Merry-man, Bonvile, Arabella, _Mrs._ Venter _and others, +as Guests Invited to the Wedding._ + +_Mer._ Son _Bonvile_, what call ye the Gentleman we met at the Garden +Door? + +_Bon._ _Friendly_ Sir, a most approv'd and worthy Gentleman, and one of +my chiefest Guests. + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, it may be so: But yet me thought he seemed somewhat +displeased, thô Son, Hah, What think you? + +_Bon._ No sure Sir, he cannot be Angry, when his Friend's so happy. + +_Mer._ I can't tell Boy, but I believe there's something more than +ordinary in the matter. Why should he leave the Company else? And Mrs. +_Clara_ I miss her too. Why Gentlemen, why do you suffer this? + +_Ara._ Unknown to any Sir, she withdrew soon as we rise from Table. + +_Mer._ Sick of the Maid perhaps; because she sees you Mrs. Bride her +Quondam Play fellow Married before her; Heh Gentlemen, heh! + +_Mr. Ven._ 'Troth like enough Brother _Merry-man_. + +_Mer._ Go, go, find her out for shame Gentlemen; and do not stand idle +thus, Od's bobs, when I was a Young fellow and invited to a Wedding, I +used to frisk and Jump, and so bestir my self, that I made all the +_Green-sickness_ Girles in the Room blush like Rubies. Ah, hah! I was a +brisk Fellow in those Days, I'faith, and used to Cut Capers a Yard high: +Nor am I yet so Old, but I can take a round or two still--Come, come +Gentlemen, lets in again and firk it away, shall we not? + +_Spr._ With all my Heart Mr. Justice. + +_Mer._ Why that's well said Mr. _Spruce_, Ods bobs it was, and I thank +you heartily. + +_Spr._ Come Madam, you must along with us, without you all's nothing. + +_Arab._ I'll wait on you Gentlemen; if you will give me leave Sir. +[_To_ Bonvile. + +_Bon._ Oh my best Joy! This Day you may Command. + +_Mer._ That's right, that's right I'faith Gentlemen! This Day she +Commands, and he for ever after. Ods bobs I have done so my self, and +hope I shall do so still. Sister _Venter_, May I presume to ask if my +Brother can say as much? + +[_Exit_ Bonvile, Arab. Spruce, _and the rest of the Guests._] + +_Mrs. Vent._ Yes Brother, I think he may, I freely Give him leave. + +_Mer._ Observe that Brother, she freely gives you leave: But who Gives +leave the Master or the Servant? + +_Mr. Ven._ You are Merry Brother, and truly you have reason, having but +one Daughter and see her Married as you would have her. + +_Mer._ Yes, I have one thank Heaven! You wou'd be glad Sister you cou'd +say so, but your Barrenness does give your Husband leave (if he please) +to look for Game elsewhere. + +_Mrs. Ven._ Well, well Sir, thô you jeer me, and make a scorn of my +Sterility-- + +_Mer._ No, no, not I Sister, I scorn not your Sterility, nor your +Husbands Virility neither. + +_Mrs. Ven._ My Husband's Virility! Pray spare my Husband; for he has not +been so idle as you imagin; He may have an--Offspring abroad for ought +you know, that you never heard of. + +_Mr. Ven._ Oh fye Wife, You will not make it publick will you? + +_Mrs. Ven._ And yet he keeps himself within compass for all that. + +_Mr. Ven._ If you love me _Winny_-- + +_Mrs. Ven._ Na, I say no more, but thereby hangs a Tale. + +_Mer._ Say'st thou so old Girle? What and has he been stragling then? +Nay; nay I know he is a Ventersome Man; And a--Merchant of small Wares +sometimes, especially when he can get a good Commodity: I love him the +better for't I'faith, Ods bobs I do--A notable spark with a Young Wench +in a corner, Is he not? A true Chip of the old block, his Father I +warrant him--But Sister, I have something to say to you in private, +concerning my Daughter. + +_Enter Nurse._ + +_Nurse._ By your leave Good Folks, Is Master _Venter_ the Merchant here +I pray? + +_Mr. Ven._ Oh Nurse! I am glad to see thee, How does my Boy? + +_Nurse._ Very well, I thank Heaven Sir! He grows bravely I assure you. +'Tis a Chopping lad I promise you, and as like your good Worship; As if +he had been spit out of your Mouth. + +_Mr. Ven._ Softly, Nurse softly. + +_Nurse._ I protest 'tis one of the forward'st Infants in the Universe; +Lord! how it will Crow, and Chirup like a Sparrow! I am afraid Sir he is +about Teeth, for he Dribbles extreamly, if so, Your Worship must provide +him a Silver Corral with a Whistle and Chain. + +_Mr. Ven._ Well, well, he shall have everything Nurse, my Wife shall +send them to ye; in the mean time, there, there's a Piece, to buy thee a +Pair of Gloves, and so leave us, for I am busie at present, therefore +steal away behind me, and slip out at the back Door. + +_Nurse._ Yes Sir, I am gone, Heavens bless your Worship, a Piece! Marry! +and that's a sufficient Charm to lye up any Nurses Tongue in +_Christendom_. + +[_Ex. Nurse_ + +_Just. Mer._ Well well, it shall be done: Come Brother we are mist I +warrant you amongst the Young Fry, let's to 'um and, Dance till our Legs +ake again, come I'll lead the way. + +_Mr. Ven._ We follow you. + +[_Exeunt._ + +_Enter_ Friendly _Reading the Letter._ + +_Fr._ Heaven in its excess of Goodness, bestow'd no greater Blessing on +Mankind than that of Friendship--To Murder any one is a Crime +unpardonable! _But a Friend!--And of all Friends the nearest to my +Heart_,--'Tis such an Imposition that Hell it self 'till now cou'd never +parallel; And yet this Devil of a Woman has power over me beyond all +Virtue. I am distracted in my Thoughts, and know not what to do; yet +something must be done without delay, or else I lose her quite: And yet +I fear 'tis most Impossible, for Friendship left the World, when Justice +fled, and all who now do wear that Name are the worst of Hypocrites, + + _Like Counterfeited Coin on which is seen, + The formal Stamp; but sordid Dross within._ + +_Enter_ Bonivile. + + _Bon._ My Friend alone and Thoughtful? say for what? + That you alone appear with Discontent, + When all my Friends Congratulate my Bliss? + Is it because (which I durst ne're suspect) + Your Love to me was not intirely true? + Or else perhaps, this Crown of Happiness + You think Misplac'd, and Envy it not yours. + + _Fri._ Forbear such cruel Words-- + How can you entertain a Thought so Vile + Of him whom so long you have call'd your Friend? + May all the Blesings Heaven can bestow + On us poor Mortals in this World below, + Crown all your Days, and may you nothing see + But flowing Tides of sweet Felicity; + But I, alas!-- + + _Bon._ Alas! What means my _Friendly_? + Much hidden Grief that wretched Word portends, + Which thus disturbs the Quiet of my Friend? + But come disclose it to me, + And since the Burthen is too much for one, + I'll bear a part to ease thy troubled Breast. + + _Fri._ Oh _Bonvile_! + Seek not to force this Fatal secret from me-- + + _Bon._ I must know it, by my best hopes I must. + + _Fri._ Oh no! I cannot, Nay I dare not-- + + _Bon._ How dare not trust a secret to a Friend? + + _Fri._ Oh _Bonville_, _Bonville_! Call me not your Friend, + That Name strikes horrour to my very Soul. + + _Bon._ Ha! Art thou then a Stranger to that Name? + + _Fri._ Indeed I am, and must be so for ever now. + + _Bon._ Yet hear me _Friendly_; Deny me if thou can'st, + Fixt as a Rock, I vow I'll here remain, + Until I have forc'd this Dire secret from thee. + + _Fri._ Pardon me Sir, I hope you soon will hear it, + But I---- + + [_Offers to go._] + + _Bon._ Yet stay, and since intreaty can't prevail, + By all the Friendship which you once profess'd, + By all that's Holy, both in Heaven and Earth, + I now Conjure thee to impart it to me, + Or by this Life---- + + _Fri._ Hold, hold, and since I can no longer hide it + Know 'tis my Honour then which lyes at Stake. + + _Bon._ Thy Honour! How? Proceed. + + _Fri._ By chance a Quarrel happen'd to arise + Betwixt another and my self, The Field, + Time, Place, and all appointed, + Nay Seconds must assist us in the Deed: + I have relied on many seeming Friends, + (Such as profess the bare and empty Name) + And all refuse to venture in my Cause. + + _Bon._ Is this all? + + _Fri_ All, Is it not enough? To see my Reputation, + (the Lifes Blood of my Soul) + Nay all that's Dear, in Danger to be lost. + + _Bon._ Not while thy _Bonvile_ lives and wears a Sword: + May all things frown that I wou'd have to smile, + May I live Poor, and Dye despised by all, + If I out live the ruine of thy Honour! + Tell me the time my Friend? + + _Fri._ Oh, spare me that, for, if once known the time, + You'l Cancel this your promise, and recall + Your Friendly proffer. + + _Bon._ Away with these Excuses, come the time. + + _Fri._ At Seven this Evening. + + _Bon._ The place? + + _Fri._ _Barn-Elms_: + Oh the fatal place! Where I too well foresee, + The certain fall and Ruine of my Honour! + + _Bon._ No, Thou shalt not stay to forfeit thy lov'd Honour, + Come I'm ready to assist my Friend; and will along with you. + + _Fri._ Alas. What mean you? + Of all my Friends on you I ne're Relied; + But sure I Dream, I Rave, by Heav'ns I'm Mad! + My _Bonvile_ leave his Wife? And on his Wedding Day? + His Bride whom he perhaps may ne're Enjoy? + And all for me? O most unhappy Man! + + _Bon._ Pleasure before my Friend I'll ne're prefer, + Nor is it lost, thô for a while, delay'd. + + _Fri._ Are you then resolv'd to go? + + _Bon._ I am as fixt in my Resolve as is the _Libertin_ in vice, + Which Death alone can part. + + _Fri._ Yet stay, and think what it is you undertake, + Recall this Rash and suddain Resolution, + Least you repent, alas when it is too late. + + _Bon._ This were enough to shake a weaker Soul, + But mine it moves not; like to a Mighty Oake, + I'm plac'd above the Storms of Fear or Doubt. + +_Enter_ Arabella. + + _Fri._ Sir, no more, the Bride, + + _Ara._ Oh, Heavens defend me! + + _Bon._ What ailes my Dearest Life? + + _Ara._ I've lost the Key of this Chain I wear about my Neck + And of these Bracelets, Oh! Unhappy Omen! + +_Bon._ No, no, my Love; I found it as it lay at Random in your Chamber, +and fearing it might be forgot, or lost, have laid it by; 'Tis safe my +Love. + +_Ara._ Indeed I'me very glad you've found it, but yet---- + +[sighs. + +_Bon._ Yet, What my Dear? from whence proceeds that sigh? + + _Ara._ Alas, I know not! + Some busie Genius Whispers to my Soul, + The loss of this upon my Wedding Day + Portend's a greater e're the Day be past. + + _Bon._ Banish such Fears, let's in and see our Friends. + + _Ara._ Indeed they all expect you; come I'll lead the way. + + _Bon._ I'll go with you. _Barn-Elms_ you say? + + [_Aside to_ Friendly. + + _Fri._ Yes that's the place, at Seven precisely; + + _Bon._ I'll meet you on the _Exchange_, and go together; + If you are there before me, Take a turn or two. + + [_Exit_ Bonvile, _and_ Arabella. + + _Fri._ Oh my Dear _Bonvile_! Art thou then the Man? + The only, only Man that I can call Friend, + And only Friend that I am bound to Kill? + A Friend, that for my sake wou'd stake his Life, + Leave a Chast Bride and untouch'd Nuptial Bed + For me base Man, nay worse than Savage Beast: + The generous Lyon, never kills his kind + They say, althô provoked to utmost rage; + Yet I vile Monster, more ungrateful Man, + Thus unprovoked, must kill my Brother Creature, + And which is worse, my Dear and only Friend! + All for the pleasure of a Foolish Woman. + + _O cruel Woman thus to Command + A Task so hard, Yet what I can't withstand! + Oh! thou rare Copy of the Original, + By which free Man at first received his fall; + For she not only wou'd her self undo, + And all her Sex, but Damn all Mankind too._ + + [_Exit._ + +_The End of the First Act._ + + + + +ACT the Second. + + +SCENE the First. + +_The Fields._ + + +_Enter_ Summerfield _solus._ + +_Sum._ A Younger Brother! 'Tis a poor Title, and very hard to bear with: +The Elder Fool inherits all the Land, whilst we are forc'd to follow +_Legacies of Wit, and get 'um when we can_. Why shou'd the Law, by which +we are deprived of equal Portion with the First-begotten, not bind our +Fathers to cease from Procreation, and so as well deprive us of a +wretched Being, as of the Thing we cannot be without: No, no, our +Mothers ne're will consent to that, they love to groan and squall, tho +at the same time the Gallows eccho's to their Groans, and both together +labour for us. From the first we travel forth--to'thers our Journey's +End. _All this I know, yet I must forward_: To beg, my Birth will ne're +consent to; and _borrowing is quite out of date_--Yet starve I cannot, +_nor murder I wou'd not_: It must be the Highway then, the old Trade we +poor honest Rogues are forc'd too--This Place will serve for a Beginner +well enough--A Beginner did I say? Yes; for this is the very first day I +open Shop--Fortune, they say, uses to help the Bold, I hope she will be +kind to me. Ha! who have we here? A Gentlewoman well rigg'd, and only a +Servant with her, She may be a Prize worth the boarding, and faith I'll +venture hard but I'll carry her. + +[_He retires to a corner of the Stage._ + +_Enter_ Arabella _in great disorder, looking about her, with_ Symon _her +Servant._ + +_Arab._ This way, say'st thou _Symon_, with _Friendly_? + +_Sym._ Yes forsooth Mistress, with Mr. _Friendly_. + +_Arab._ Alas! I'm tired and cannot travel further; my Heart is full of +Fear, and yet I know not why, nor can I tell why he should use me +thus,--It is not common sure for Men to leave their Brides upon the +Wedding-day: And yet I cannot tell but it may be so! O wretched State of +Marriage, and of Love, if this be Love! Here will I lie me down, and +rest a while [_Lies down._] my wearied Limbs, unused to these sad +Frights and Fears--But prethee do thou run after him, and if it be +possible o'retake him too: Tell him the strange Disorder thou dost leave +me in; and let him know my Father's Anger, his Friends Concern, and what +is more, his _Arabella_'s sad Complaint; tell him, I grieve, I faint, I +die; tell him any thing that may stay him. + +_Sym._ Yes Forsooth. + +_Arab._ Intreat him to return; nay, urge him all thou canst to make him +come again: Nay haste, good _Symon_, fly if thou canst, for I can stir +no further. + +_Sym._ Well, well, Forsooth, I am gone. + +[_Exit_ Symon. + +_Arab._ Alas, how wretched and forlorn am I! + + _I she whom once so many did admire, + Whose Wit and Charms the coldest Hearts cou'd fire! + Now wretched Maid, and most unhappy Wife, + In Sighs and in Complaints must end my Life. + Abandoned by my Husband, e're enjoyed, + With thoughts of Pleasure, yet untasted, cloy'd. + He leaves me now to my sad Frights a Prey; + O, my dear_ Bonvile! _whither dost thou stray? + Unheard, alas! I make my amarous Moans; + The Winds and Waves refuse to bear my Groans: + Eccho her self can't suffer my Complaint, + But with repeated Sighs grows tir'd and faint. + Where to find him, good Heaven direct me! + For losing him, I more than lose my self._ + +[_Rises, and_ Exit. + +_Sum._ I must after her, she's worth my Acquaintance, and has good +Moveables about her I perceive, what e're the Ready is. The next Turning +has a most convenient Hollow for the Purpose, and there I'll make her +sure. Now Luck, or never. + +[_Exit after_ Arabella. + +_Reenter_ Arabella, _and_ Summerfield _after her._ + +_Ara._ I'm at a stand already, and know not where I am. + +_Sum._ I'll direct you, Madam; Well overtaken. + +_Ara._ Bless me, Sir; What are you? + +_Sum._ A Man. + +_Ara._ An honest Man, I hope? + +_Sum._ Yes faith in some Respects, I'm very honest, but not altogether +so; I were not fit to live in the World if I were too honest, Child. + +_Ara._ Alas! then I begin to fear: Pray tell me what you are? + +_Sum._ Why, faith, an honest Thief. + +_Ara._ How, honest, and yet a Thief? I never heard they were of Kin +before; Pray, Heaven, I find it now. + +_Sum._ Indeed! a very honest Thief. + +_Ara._ Well, Sir, since that's your Title, pray use me kindly: Nay, I'm +sure you will, there's something in your Looks which speaks you mild and +noble. + +_Sum._ Yes, I am a Gentleman, and you shall find me so; for I'll not +offer you the least shew of Violence, or offer to corrupt your Chastity; +thô indeed you are tempting Fair, and might inflame a colder Heart than +mine: Yet Ravishing's no part of my Profession as yet; or if it were, +you look so charming Innocent, you wou'd disarm my wildest Thoughts. + +_Ara._ Blessings on your Goodness! + +_Sum._ Are you a Maid, or Wife? + +_Ara._ I am both, Sir. + +_Sum._ Then this it seems is your Wedding-day, and these the Hours of +Interim that keep you in that double State? + +_Ara._ Indeed you are in the right. + +_Sum._ Come then, I'll be brief, and hinder not your desired _Hymen_. +You have some superfluous Toys I see about you, which you must deliver; +I mean, that Chain of Gold and Pearl about your Neck, and those pretty +Bracelets about your Arms, (pray, Heaven, they prove not Emblems of the +combined Hemp which is to halter mine); come, Madam, pray deliver 'em. + +_Ara._ Nay, I intreat you, Sir, to take 'em, for I cannot give 'em, they +are lock'd you see, and truly I have not the Key about me; it may be you +are furnish'd with Instruments that may unloose 'em, I pray do. + +_Sum._ No faith, Madam, I'm but a Beginner in this same Business, and am +wholly unprovided of any Pick-lock Tools besides this Sword. + +[_Draws his Sword._ + +_Ara._ O, good Sir, do not shew me that, 'tis too frightful; pray hurt +me not, for I do yield them freely: Use your Hands, perhaps their +strength will serve to tear 'em from me without more ado. Some Pain I'll +quietly endure, provide you do not hurt me much. + +_Sum._ Alas, dear Lady, I'll use you as gently as I can upon my Word; +but 'tis devilish strong.--If I hurt you, pray speak. + +[_He endeavours to break the Chain about her Neck._] + +_Ara._ Not much, Sir. + +_Sum._ I am glad on't,--S'death, I can't do it. + +[_She draws his Sword, and stands upon her Guard._ + +_Ara._ No Sir, nor shall not now: You a Highway-man and guard your self +no better: Come, Sir, what Money have you? Deliver quickly. + +_Sum._ Not a Cross by this foolish Hand of mine! + +_Ara._ How, no Money, 'twere pity then to take this from thee; Here, +take it again, I know you'l use me ne're the worse for what I have done. + +[_Gives him his Sword again._] + +_Sum._ No, by my Life! + +_Ara._ I do believe you; and now pray hear me--Here on my Knees, in +sight of Heaven, I make this solemn Protestation, That if you'l but +forbear the Rifling of this Chain and Bracelets, and go but with me +Home, by all the Vows which I this Day have plighted to my dearest +Husband, I will deliver you in Money the full Value of these I wear, +and cannot for my Life get off. + +_Sum._ Ha! Ready-money is the Prize I look for; it passes without +suspicion every where, when Chains and Jewels are often stop'd and +call'd for before the Magistrate: But---- + +_Ara._ Nay never doubt! You saw I gave you my Advantage up, and +questioned not my safety at your hands, pray fear not yours in mine. + +_Sum._ I know not what to do. + +_Ara._ Pray tell me, Sir, did you ever think a Woman true? + +_Sum._ I have heard of some, but very few. + +_Ara._ Will you add one more to your belief? + +_Sum._ I think I may, for they were fewer than the Articles of my Faith, +therefore I have room for you, and will believe you--Yet stay, you say +you'l ransom your jewels with Ready-money when you come Home; so you +may, and then discover me. + +_Ara._ Shall I repeat the Vows I made? + +_Sum._ No, for I'll trust you; and if you do betray me, then Mercy upon +me, and Farewel. I knew a Gentleman that had been a Courtier at +_Whitehall_ fifteen Years, and he was buried e're he took a Bride: 'Tis +very strange you'l say; and may be my Case in another way. + +_Ara._ Come, Sir, never fear: A Man and afraid; Fie, fie! + +_Sum._ Give me your Hand, I'll wait on you; and if you are (as I believe +you) True and Just, you are the World's Wonder! Come, Madam. + +[_Exeunt._ + + +SCENE II. + +_Enter two Boys, one with a Child in his Arms._ Compass _on the other +side._ + +_1 Boy._ _Jack_, Who's this? + +_2 Boy._ O _Jeminy_! I'll be hang'd if it ben't Goodman _Compass_, that +they said was dead three Years ago. + +_1 Boy._ Od's Life, and so it is! + +_Comp._ O _London_! sweet _London_! Do I live to see thee once again? My +Eyes are full of Brine for Joy. And if my dear _Peggy_ be but living +still, I shall cry 'em out. + +_1 Boy._ Goodman _Compass_, I am glad to see you; You are welcome home. + +_Comp._ Thank you, good Lad: Honest _Jack_ here too? Why, thou art grown +a little Man since I saw thee last: What, is that thy own, heh? + +_2 Boy._ I am fain to keep it, you see, whoever got it; it may be other +Mens Cases as well as mine. + +_Comp._ Thou say'st true _Jack_: But whose pretty Knave is it? + +_2 Boy._ My Dame's where I live. + +_Comp._ And not thy Master's? + +_2 Boy._ Nay, nay, I can't tell that neither: My Master loves it as well +as if it were his own, and for ought I see better than my Dame. + +_Comp._ A very good Lad by my Troth! + +_2 Boy._ But, Goodman _Compass_, I can tell you News, Your Wife has a +brave Boy too of her own, not above a Quarter old, as big as two of +this. + +_Comp._ Ha! say'st thou so, _Jack_? Ha, ha, ha, by my Troth I am +heartily glad to hear it: I'll give thee a dozen of Ale, and thy News be +true, Boy. + +_1 Boy._ I assure you 'tis very true: All your Neighbours can tell you +the same. + +_Comp._ Ha, ha, ha! But a Quarter old, and so lusty, say you? What +plaguy thundering Boys are got now-a-days: I Gad, I shall split my Sides +with Laughing; Ha, ha, ha.--But _Jack_, I have been loth to ask thee all +this while, for fear of ill News, how does my Wife? + +_2 Boy._ O never better, nor ever so lusty and handsome--And truly she +wears better Clothes than she was wont, especially on Holy-days: she has +Silk-Gowns, and Lac'd-Petticoats, and fine _Holland_-Smocks too, they +say, that have seen 'em: And some of our Neighbours say, they were taken +up in _Cheap_. + +_Comp._ Like enough, _Jack_; and there they must be paid for--Well, good +Lads, go and tell my Wife the joyful Tidings of my Return. + +_2 Boy._ That I will with all my Heart, for she heard you were dead long +ago. + +_1 Boy._ Nay, I'll go along with you _Jack_. + +_2 Boy._ Come then. + +[_Exeunt 2 Boys._ + +_Comp._ Well, _Peggy_, if I am one of the Livery, I thank thee for it: +The Cuckolds are the greatest Company in all the City: And we have more +Aldermen among us, than all the other put them together. + +_Enter_ Peg, Compass_'s Wife._ + +_Peg._ O my dear sweet Honey-suckle! Art thou alive? I am glad to see +thee with all my Heart and Soul, so I am. + +[_Runs and kisses him._] + +_Comp._ O, ho! good Spouse, give me leave to shed a few pearly Tears; +the Fountain of Love will have its Course: And thô I cannot Sing at +first sight, yet I can Cry you see. I am as it were new come into the +World; and Children Cry before they Laugh, a long time you know. + +_Peg._ Yes; and so thou art new born indeed to me, my _Numpy_; for I was +told you were dead long since, and never thought to see this dear sweet +Face of thine again: I heard thou wert div'd to the bottom of the Sea, +and that you never did intend to see poor _Peggy_ more. + +_Comp._ He, he, he, I was going down, as you say _Peg_, but I thought +better on't, and turn'd back: I heard an ill Report of my Neighbours +there; the devouring Sharks, and other Sea-Monsters, whose Company, to +tell you the Truth, I did not like; and therefore resolv'd to come home +and bide with thee my Girl--Come kiss thy poor Hubby, kiss me I say, for +Sorrow begins to ebb apace. + +_Peg._ A thousand, thousand Welcomes home dear _Numpy_! + +_Comp._ An Ocean of Thanks, kind _Peggy_: Well, and how goes all at +Home? What Lank still, poor _Peg_? Wil't ne're be full Sea at our Wharf? + +_Peg._ Alas, Husband, what do you mean? + +_Comp._ A Lass, is it, or a Lad, Wench? I shou'd be glad of both; I +look'd for a pair of Compasses long afore now. + +_Peg._ What, and you from home, Love? + +_Comp._ I from home? Why thô I was from home, and other of our +Neighbours from home, does that follow that every body else is from +home? + +_Peg._ I am pleased you are so merry, Husband. + +_Comp._ Merry, nay I'll be merrier yet; why shou'd I be sorry? I hope my +Boy's well, is he not? Od's fish, I look for another by this Time. + +_Peg._ Boy, what Boy, Deary? + +_Comp._ What Boy! why the Boy I got when I came home in the Cock-boat +one Night, about a Year ago; You have not forgotten it, I hope, I think +I left behind me for a Boy, and a Boy I look for. + + _Peg._ I find he knows all--What shall I do? [_Aside._] + O dear Husband, pray pardon me. [_Kneels._] + +_Comp._ Pardon thee; why I hope thou hast not made away with my Boy, +hast thou? Od's death I'll hang thee, if there were never a Whore more +in _London_, if thou hast. + +_Peg._ O no; but your long Absence, and the Rumour of your Death, +[_Cries._] made me think I might venture. + +_Comp._ Venture, quoth a, I can't blame thee, _Peg_; for _Wapping_, if +it were twice _Wapping_, can't hold out always, no more than _Redriff_, +_Limehouse_ or _Shadwel_, nay or the strongest Suburbs about _London_; +and when it comes to that, wo be to the City too, Girl. + +_Peg._ Consider, Husband, I'm but a Woman, neither the first or last +that have done the same, and truly I won't deny but I have a Child. + +_Comp._ Have you so? And what by Consequence must I have then, I pray? + +_Peg._ If you'l forgive me this Time, it shall be so no more, indeed and +indeed, now. + +_Comp._ Well, well. I will forgive thee, _Peg_, upon this Condition, +that you tell me who it was that fell foul aboard thee, and sprung this +Leak in thee. + +_Peg._ O dear Husband! + +_Comp._ Nay, no Excuses, for I must know. + +_Peg._ Why then truly it was Mr. _Venter_ the Merchant. + +_Comp._ I am beholding to him, and wou'd requite his Civility, if his +Wife were but as willing, thô he be one of our Merchants at Sea, he +shall give me leave to be Owner at home; and where is my Boy? what, +shan't I see him? + +_Peg._ Yes if you please, good Husband: He's nurs'd at _Bednal green_; +'tis now too late, to Morrow will be better. + +_Comp._ Come then we'l home and to bed. + + _Let other Fools repine at Scoffs and Scorns, + I'll teach the Cuckold how to hide his Horns._ + +[Exeunt. + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman, _Mr._ Venter, Spruce, _Mrs._ Venter _and_ +Clara. + +_Mer._ Was the like ever known, that a Bridegroom shou'd absent himself +on his Wedding-Day? + +Mr. _Ven._ 'Tis somewhat strange indeed. + +_Mer._ And the Bride too my Daughter, she's out of the way: Why what +shou'd be the meaning of all this, Od's bobs I can't tell? + +Mrs. _Ven._ Perhaps they'r busy Brother, privately conferring Notes +together: You can't tell but that the young Man may have a stomach to +his Supper, and fall too unawares, and we ne're the wiser. + +_Spr._ Od's nigs, very true; what wou'd you say then Sir, if they shou'd +be stol'n away, and a-bed together seriously? + +_Mer._ What wou'd I say? marry I wou'd say, Speed 'em well: And if no +worse News ever comes to me, I'll be hang'd if e're I cry'd for't. + +_Enter Nurse._ + +How now, what's the Business with you? + +_Nurse._ Business enough, Forsooth; for I have the strangest Tydings! + +_Mer._ Of any One that's lost, Woman? + +_Nurse._ No forsooth, of One that's found again, an't please you. + +_Mer._ O, he was lost then it seems. + +Mr. _Ven._ Her Business is with me, I believe Brother; is it not, Woman? + +_Nurse._ Yes, Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Come hither then, [_Nurse whispers Mr._ Venter.] How, +return'd? + +_Nurse._ Yes indeed, Sir, and all discovered. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ah Curse on the Wind that blew him ashore. + +_Nurse._ Aye, so say I Sir, and did not sink him when he was going. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, well, be sure you do not let him come near the Child. + +_Nurse._ I warrant you, Sir, if you charge me to the contrary. + +Mr. _Ven._ Yes, I do strictly charge you as you tender my Displeasure. + +_Nurse._ Well then let me alone--Besides, Sir, he intends to come to +morrow morning with his Wife and see him. + +Mr. _Ven._ I'll meet him there; and if he chance to be there before me, +be sure to keep the Child safe, and not let him touch it. + +_Nurse._ I warrant you, let me alone. + +[_Exit Nurse._ + +_Enter_ Summerfield _and_ Arabella. + +_Mer._ So, so, Heaven be praised, they are not both lost I see, here's +the Bride, my Daughter, come again. + +_Ara._ Father, and Gentlemen, I desire ye to treat this Stranger here +with all Respect and Generosity; He's a loving Kinsman of my _Bonvile_'s +who kindly came to congratulate our Wedding. + +_Mer._ Sir, you are heartily welcome. Od's bobs you are. + +Mr. _Ven._ Welcome to all of us. + +_Spruce._ Seriously, Sir, and so you are. + +_Mer._ But where's the Bridegroom, Girl? Od's bobs we're all at a +Nonplus here, at a stand, quite out; the Musicks ceas'd, and we all look +as thô there were neither a light Heart or Heel among us; nay, my Cousin +_Clara_ too as cloudy as on a washing Day. + +_Clara._ 'Tis then because you will not dance with me, Sir. + +_Ara._ 'Tis I alone have cause to be sad, if this Day's Happiness cou'd +admit of any; But I've long reason'd with my pressing Thoughts, and from +them drawn some Symptoms of Relief. Suppose this Day hath long since +appointed by my dear _Bonvile_, to meet some Foe, and right his injur'd +Reputation: Nay, say he fights, alas! Why shou'd I fear, when all the +Powers above, that guard true Love and Innocence, will never see him +fall. + +_Mer._ Prethee peace, good Girl hold thy tongue; Od's bobs thou'lt make +us all Cowards, to hear a Woman preach up Valour thus. + +_Ara._ Well, Sir, I have done: But pray entertain this Gentleman kindly +for my sake. Indeed I was afraid when I saw him first. + +_Sum._ Ha! what does she say? Od's Death she'l tell! + +_Ara._ Being in search of my dear _Bonvile_, I had quite lost my Way +when he most opportunely came unto my Aid, and gave me many marks of his +Esteem in my distress of Fears; nay more than this, which I'll declare +at large. + +_Sum._ Death and Hell, she'l betray me. + +_Ara._ Well, Gentlemen, since the Bridegroom's absent, I must supply his +Place: Come, when I have waited on you to your Pleasure, I will return +[_To_ Summerfield.] to you, Sir, we must discourse more of my _Bonvile_ +yet. + +[_Exeunt all but_ Summerfield.] + +_Manet_ Summerfield _solus._ + +_Sum._ What a trembling Trade's this, when Conscience, that shou'd be +our only Guide, flies and leaves us to our accusing Guilt. A Thief! the +very Name and Thought chills my Blood, and makes me tremble like an +Ague-fit. A Dog, nay every Bough that moves, puts us in fear of present +Apprehension. Sure I shall never thrive on this Trade: Perhaps I need +take no further Care, I may be now near to my Journey's End, or at least +in a fair way to _Newgate_, and from thence to _Tyburn_, the only Place +that we poor Rogues can claim for an Inheritance. Trust a Woman, and +with a Matter of such Importance, what a simple Dog am I? I cou'd find +in my Heart to run away: And that were base to run from a woman; I can +lay claim to nothing but her Vows, and those the Women seldom or never +mind. + +_Enter_ Arabella. + +_Ara._ So, Sir, now you shall find a Woman as good as her Promise; Here +are 20 Pieces, the full Value, on my Life, of what they cost. + +_Sum._ Pray, Madam, do not thus suspend my doubtful Soul; but if you do +design to insnare my Life, speak, speak freely: Or if the Constable be +at the Door, let him shew his Staff of Authority, perhaps I may corrupt +him with a Bribe. + +_Ara._ How! base ungrateful Man, do you suspect my Faith? Nay then, +Father, Uncle, and Gentlemen, where are you? + +_Enter all as before._ + +_Mer._ How now, how now! What's the matter, Girl? + +_Ara._ For shame, will you not entertain your Kinsman here a little +better: you leave him here alone, as thô you despised his Company. + +_Mer._ Is that all? I thought the Bridegroom had been return'd: Sir, +pray pardon this Rudeness; But indeed I had quite forgot you, quite +forgot you, as I hope to be sav'd: But what makes you tremble, Sir, are +you ill dispos'd. + +_Ara._ Think you he hath not reason to be ill-disposed at this cold +[_Aside to Justice_ Merryman.] Entertainment? for my part I blush for +shame. + +_Spr._ Come pray, Sir, shake off this Dulness, and participate of our +Mirth, Od's nigs do. + +_Sum._ I am very well, Sir, I thank you, only the Gentleman is a little +under a Mistake. + +_Mer._ It may be so, Ay, ay, it may be so; I vow I thought you had +trembled, but I believe it might be my own Hand; you must pardon me, I +was stiffer once. + +_Sum._ Sir, your humble Servant. + +_Mer._ But, Gentlemen, what think you of an Adventure? + +_Spr._ Adventure whither? + +_Mer._ Why, to the _East-Indies_? I have a Vessel, Gentlemen, called the +_Sea-Horse_, bound thither, and to morrow I do expect her to sail. Now, +Gentlemen, if you'l venture, ye shall have fair Dealing, that I'll +promise you. And for the French, you need not fear them, for she is a +smart new Vessel: Nay, she hath a Letter of Mart too, and twenty brave +roaring Boys on both Sides her, Starboard and Larboard: And I intend to +go as far as _Marget_ down with her, 'twill be as good as Physick to me. + +_Spr._ A very good Motion, Sir, I begin, there's my ten Pieces. + +_Sum._ And, Sir, if a proffer'd Love may be accepted, be pleased to take +my ten Pieces with you. + +_Mer._ Your's above all the rest, Sir. + +_Ara._ That's kindly said, Sir, and I thank you: Now pray venture Ten +more for my sake. + +_Sum._ Alas, Madam, it's a younger Brother's Portion. + +_Ara._ At my Request, Sir, venture the other Ten; if you want, I'll +supply you with as many more. + +_Sum._ With all my Heart then: Come, Sir, if you please, I'll double +mine: So now she's got her Gold again, and I am now no Thief, (_aside_) +Sir, I have a Suit to you, + +[_To_ Merryman. + +_Mer._ You may command it, for I am always at your Service: But pray +your Pleasure? + +_Sum._ My Request, Sir, is, to have the Honour of keeping you Company to +Sea, for I have a great desire to see _Marget_. + +_Mer._ Sir, I shall be very happy in your good Company. + +_Ara._ I hope you will be both better acquainted e're you return; and by +that time your Kinsman may be here to make you more welcome. + + _And for the Gold at my Request you lent, + I'll double it to give you more content._ + + Sum. _Why shou'd I fear, since she is prov'd so just? + I'll quit my Trade: Now_ Jack Catch _do thy worst._ + +_Exeunt._ + +_The End of the Second ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Third. + +_A Wood_ + + +_Enter_ Bonvile _and_ Friendly. + +_Bon._ Come my brave _Friendly_, I think we are here the first: Your +Enemy is not yet i'th Field; let's walk a Turn or two, perhaps by that +time he may arrive. + +_Fri._ I'm very confident that he's here already. + +_Bon._ Thy Looks, me-thinks, speak Conquest sure thy own; an ardent Rage +has kindled both thy Cheeks. + +_Fri._ Like a red Morning, Friend; which still foretels a stormy Day to +follow--And now I well observe your Face, me-thinks it waxes pale, +there's Death in it already. + +_Bon._ How, _Friendly_, do you then take me for a Coward? My Face look +pale, and Death in it already? By Heav'n, shou'd any but my _Friendly_ +dare to tell me what thou hast said, my Sword shou'd ram the base +Affront down the curst Villain's Throat. But you are my Friend, and I +must only chide your Error. But prethee tell me who is it you are to +fight with, for as yet I am ignorant both of the Cause and Person. + +_Fri._ Ha, his Name! Did you enquire his Name? + +_Bon._ Yes. + +_Fri._ I dare not yet reveal it for fear of---- + +_Bon._ For fear of what? + +_Fri._ O Confusion! I know not what to say! + +_Bon._ How, afraid to tell his Name? Then I begin to doubt the Justice +of your Quarrel. + +_Fri._ Too well you may, for by yon' setting Sun, that Globe of heavenly +Light I swear, I come to kill the only Man that strives to save my +Life--Man did I say? Nay more than common Man, for those the World +abound with; but such a Man besides, all this vast Land affords not. + +_Bon._ By this your large Encomium of your Friend, I'm afraid 'twas Wine +first made your Quarrel, and thereupon this Challenge did ensue. + +_Fri._ O no! I call the Powers above to witness, that in all the Course +of our unhappy Friendship, I to my knowledg never did receive the least +Affront or Injury from him. + +_Bon._ How came this Challenge then? + +_Fri._ O dear Friend, the noblest that Man cou'd ever boast of: +[_embraces him_] When first my rigid Fate threw on me this Command to +fight, I had recourse to many whom I always thought my Friends; but when +the Touchstone of my Danger try'd 'em, I found 'em like the cursed Fruit +of _Sodom_, fair without, but rotten at the Heart: But then I found out +_Bonvile_, my only dearest Friend. _Bonvile_ no sooner heard of my +Engagement, but flew unto my Succour with as much Bravery, as a great +General hastned by Alarms, marches to meet the Foe: You left your +Nuptial Bed perhaps to meet your Death. O unheard-of Friendship! My +Father gave me Life, 'tis true; but you, my Friend, support my Honour. +All this for me, while I, ungrateful Man, thus seek your Life: For to my +eternal Horror be it spoke, you are the Man whom I come here to kill. + +_Bon._ Ha! + +_Fri._ Too true alas! there read the Warrant for your Death. + +[_Gives him the Letter._] + +_Bon._ 'Tis a Woman's Hand. + +_Fri._ Yes, and a bad One too, they all speak fair, write foul, but mean +worse. + +_Bon._ How! kill me? Sure, I dream, and this is all Delusion, or else +thou dost it only to try thy Friend. + +_Fri._ O, from my Soul, I wish it were no more. But read, read on, see +how I'm fetter'd in a _Circe's_ Charms--I love beyond Imagination, love +even to Madness, and must as madly do a Deed will damn me to the hottest +Flames of Hell. + +_Bon._ And woo't thou kill thy Friend for such a Woman? + +_Fri._ Alas! I must, you see I am commanded, commanded too by Love; Love +more powerful than all the Sacred Ties of Friendship, therefore draw, +and guard thy self. [_Draws._ + +_Bon._ Not I by Heaven! What wou'dst thou have me draw and kill my +Friend? + +_Fri._ There thou stab'st my Soul. O where, where is now my Resolution +fled? A fatal Blast has struck me; a sudden Horror shot me thrô the +Heart; a Trembling seiz'd my Knees, that I can hardly stand, and all my +Vital Powers methinks seem dead; yet Love's the Fire must kindle all +again, therefore I charge thee draw, or naked as thou art, I will assail +thee. + +_Bon._ I am defended against all that thou canst do, in having Justice +on my Side, and Friendship too to back it. + + _But since Humanity now bears so sway, + To this unguarded Breast come make your way._ + +Strike home be sure. + +[_Opens his Bosom._ + +_Fri._ That were a barbarous Murder. + +_Bon._ How can the Effect prove different from the Cause? Or how can any +thing but damn'd Barbarity ensue a Woman's much more damn'd Design? Who +wou'd expect Reason from one that raves, or hope for Mercy in a Tyger's +Den? Believe me, _Friendly_, all this may sooner be; Mercy may sooner +dwell among the Savage Wolves and Bears, than in a Woman's Breast. + +_Fri._ O, my too rigid Fate, to place me thus on such a dangerous +Precipice, that wheresoe're I turn my self for help, I see my Ruin still +before mine Eyes. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Bon._ [_Pausing._] Stay--The Command which thy _Medea_ sent thee, was +to kill thy only dearest Friend, was it not? + +_Fri._ Alas! it was. + +_Bon._ Then here, all Friendship dies between us; thus hast thou kill'd +thy Friend, and satisfied that infernal Hag, thy cursed Mistress, who +thus commanded thee: Away, I say, begon, and never see me more. + +_Fri._ Ha! + +_Bon._ Yes, base ungrateful Wretch, farewel, (_Offers to go_) --Yet +stay, and since that Sacred Tie of Friendship's broke, know thou, most +vile of Men, that _Bonvile_'s now thy Enemy; therefore do thou draw and +guard thy spotted Life. + +_Fri._ How, Friend! + +_Bon._ Friend didst thou call me? On forfeit of thy Life that word no +more; the very Name of Friend from thee, shall be a Quarrel: How can I +tell but that thou lovest my Wife, and therefore feign'd this damn'd +Design to draw me from her Arms? + +_Fri._ How! wrong thy Wife? O no, I never had a Thought so vile! Yet you +must forgive me, indeed you must, by all that once was dear to me; and +what I dare not mention more, by Love and Honour, I implore thy +Pardon--Still art thou deaf to my Complaints?--Nay, then upon my Knee, I +will enforce thy Pity. Behold me, _Bonvile_, prostrate at thy Feet, +crawling for Mercy, swimming in Tears, and almost drown'd with Shame; +extend thy Arm to help me, as thou'rt a Man, be God-like in thy Nature, +and raise me from the Grave; turn thy Eyes on me, and sink me not with +Frowns; O save me, save me, or I fall for ever. + +_Bon._ As soon shall Heav'n reverse the Fate of Hell, as I recal what I +have said, or plant thee in my Breast again. + +_Fri._ Nay, then I am lost to thee, and all the World besides. + +[_Rises._ + +_Bon._ Thou are indeed for ever lost to me; see what a miserable Wretch +thy Folly now has made thee: A Creature so far below my Pity, that I +despise and scorn thy base Submission, and will never hear thee more, +more. + +_Fri._ Say but thou hast forgiven me, and I will ask no more. + +_Bon._ I never will. + +_Fri._ O cruel _Bonvile_! + +_Bon._ More barbarous _Friendly_: Hold off, or I will use thee like a +Dog, tread thee to Earth, and spurn thee like a Slave, base as thou art. + +_Fri._ Still thou art my Friend---- + +_Bon._ Thou ly'st, I have abjured the Name. + +_Fri._ Let me but go with thee. + +_Bon._ Not for the World; I'de rather venture my self with Crocodiles, +catch the last dying Gasps of some poor Wretch infested with the Plague, +than trust my self with thee. + + _Farewel, I leave thee with the greatest Curse, + Condemn'd to Woman, Hell affords no worse._ + +[_Exit, breaking from him._ + +Friendly solus, _rising in a Passion._ + +_Fri._ Death and Destruction, am I thus despised! Condemned to Woman's +Lust, and scorn'd by Man. By _Bonvile_ too, after imploring, like a +School-Boy, at his Feet--My Blood boils high, and scalds my very Heart! +My inward Grief calls on me for Revenge, and I am all on fire! O that I +had the proud _Bonvile_ here now at my Feet, I'de use him worse than he +did me before. + + _But since that open Force yields no Relief, + Private Revenge shall ease my swelling Grief. + With Thoughts of Jealousy I'll fill his Soul, + Which shall its Powers of all their Rest controul. + Thus for a Woman I've begun a War, + And for her sake must damn my Soul like her._[Exit. + + +SCENE the Second. + +_Enter_ Nurse, Compass, _and his Wife._ + +_Nurse._ Indeed you must pardon me, I can't let ye see the Child; to +tell you the Truth, I am commanded to the contrary. + +_Comp._ Commanded! Prethee who commanded thee? + +_Nurse._ The Father. + +_Comp._ The Father, Why who am I? + +_Nurse._ Not the Father sure, the Civil Law has found it otherwise. + +_Comp._ The Civil Law found it otherwise! Why then the Uncivil Law shall +make it mine again, I'll be as dreadful as a _Shrove-Tuesday_ to thee; +for I'll besiege thy squalling catterwauling Castle, with my Friends the +Mob, and gut thy stinking Nursery, but I'll both see and have my Child. + +_Nurse._ Harkee, Goodman Swabber, say but half so much again, and I'll +call the Constable, and lay Burglary to your Charge. You wou'd not be so +hot if the Enemy were in View, nor if you had to do with any body but a +poor innocent Woman, so you wou'd'nt. + +_Peg._ Good Husband be patient, and let me alone with her: Come, come, +good Nurse, let him see the Boy. + +_Nurse._ Indeed I dare not Goody _Compass_: The Father first you know +delivered me the Child, and order'd me to let no body see it. He pays me +well and weekly for my Pains, and therefore I'll do as be bad me, so I +will. + +_Comp._ Why thou white Bastard-breeder; Is not this Woman here the +Mother? + +_Nurse._ Yes, I grant you that. + +_Comp._ Do you so? Well, and I grant it too; And is not the Child then +my own by the Wives Copy-hold? + +_Nurse._ The Law must try that. + +_Comp._ The Law! What then you think I'll be but its Father-in-Law? I +tell thee, all the Wit and Law twixt _Cuckolds-Point_ and +_Westminster-Hall_, shan't keep my own dear Flesh and Blood from me, I +warrant you that. No an't does, I'll be hanged at the Main-yard: Why, +who, dost think, uses to get my Children but my self? + +_Nurse._ Nay, I can't tell; you must look to that, for my part I ne're +knew you get any. + +_Comp._ Say'st thou so? Why, look you, do but put on a clean Smock, and +try me, if thou darst, I'll hold thee three to one I get thee with Child +before I leave thee: Heh! what say'st thou? + +[_Offers to lay hold on her._. + +_Nurse._ I'll see you hang'd first--Nay, pray be quiet, and don't offer +to spoil my Milk. Lord, you are as boisterous as my Husband was the +first Night we were married: Pray, Goody _Compass_, take off your Cur, +or else he'l bite me. + +_Peg._ No never fear him, Nurse, he's not so furious I assure ye. + +_Enter Mr._ Venter _and his Wife._ + +_Nurse._ O! here's my Master, the Child's Father, now talk with him. + +Mr. _Ven._ Good morrow Neighbour, good morrow to ye both. + +_Comp._ Both! Good morrow to you and your Wife too, if you go to that. + +Mr. _Ven._ I wou'd speak calmly with you, Friend, if you think fit. + +_Comp._ I know what belongs to Calm, and a Storm too; and if you please, +a cold word or two wi' you. + +Mr. _Ven._ With all my Heart. + +_Comp._ I understand that you have ty'd your Mare in my Ground. + +Mr. _Ven._ My Mare, Friend, nay I assure you, 'twas only my Nag. + +_Comp._ Your Nag? Well your Nag then let it be: Harke, Sir, to be short, +I'll cut off your Nag's Tail, if e're I catch him there again. + +Mr. _Ven._ Pray hear me, you are too rough to maintain---- + +_Comp._ I say, Sir, you shall maintain no Child of mine; my Wife does +not bestow her Labour for that purpose. + +Mr. _Ven._ You are too passionate--I will not maintain---- + +_Comp._ No marry shall you not. + +Mr. _Ven._ The Deed I have done to be lawful, I have repented it, and +given Satisfaction to the Law, my Purse has paid for't; therefore I +wou'd treat milder with you if you'd be pleased. + +_Comp._ Yes, yes, I am very well pleased, and shall be better pleased if +you can serve me so still: For, look you Sir, one of these Days I shall +to Sea again, you know where my Wife lives; yet you'l but lose your +labour, for get as many Children as you can, I assure you, you shall +keep none of them. + +Mr. _Ven._ I think you are mad. + +_Comp._ Why, if I am Horn-mad, what's that to you? + +Mr. _Ven._ Nay then, since you are so rough, I tell you plainly you +are--a---- + +_Comp._ A what? What am I, heh? + +Mr. _Ven._ A Coxcomb. + +_Comp._ A Coxcomb! a Cuckold you mean, and you a Fool for your pains. + +Mr. _Ven._ The Child is mine, I am the Father of it, and will keep it. + +_Comp._ Yes if you can, I know you will. But pray tell me, is not my +Wife the Mother? You may be as far from being the Father as I am, for my +Wife's acquainted with more Whore-masters besides your self; ay, and as +crafty Merchants too, let me tell you that. + +_Peg._ No indeed Husband, I had to do with no body else, 'twas he begot, +indeed and indeed now. Yet for all that, the Child's mine, I bred it and +bore it, and I'll have it and keep it, so I will. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Pray hold there Mrs. Jill-flurt, the Child's my Husband's, +and he shall have it, or I'll tear your Eyes out, ye Whore you. + +_Comp._ Good Words, Mistress; d'ye hear, give good Words you'd best, or +I shall tell you your own. + +Mr. _Ven._ I'll have no more to say to ye, the Law shall determine it; +in the mean time Nurse keep the Child for me, there, there's Money for +thee. + +[_Gives her Money. + +_Comp._ There's Money for me too, keep it for me, Nurse; give him both +thy Duggs at once, I pay thee for the right one, Girl. + +_Nurse._ I have two Hands, you see Gentlemen; this does but show ye how +the Law will hamper ye; even thus you'l be used, Gentlemen, if you go to +Law. + +Mr. _Ven._ It can't be helpt, for I won't lose my Right. + +_Comp._ Nor I mine for all you're a Merchant. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Nor I mine for all I did not bear it. + +_Peg._ Nor I, tho but a poor Sailer's Wife. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, fare ye well, we shall meet in another Place--Come +_Winny_. + +[_Exit_ Venter _and his Wife._ + +_Comp._ Ay, ay, I'll meet you when and where you dare, and do your +worst, I fear you not: By the Lord _Harry_ the World's come to a fine +Pass, that we must go to Law for our Children. No wonder the Lawyers are +all so rich, yet e're the Law shall have a Limb, a Leg, a Joint or Nail +of this same Boy, + + _'T shall cost me more than a whole Child in getting, + Some win by play, and standers by with Betting._ + +[Exeunt. + + +SCENE the Third. + +_Enter_ Spruce, Arabella _with a Letter in her Hand_, Clara, _Mr._ +Venter, _and Mrs._ Venter. + +Mr. _Ven._ From whence came that Letter, Niece? + +_Ara._ From _Putney_, Sir, and from my Husband. + +Mr. _Ven._ And pray be free; Does he tell ye the Cause of his leaving +you so abruptly on his Wedding-day? + +_Ara._ Yes; Sir, yet this had been sufficient to have let me known what +he is gone about, without the formal Addition of an Epistle. + +_Spruce._ That, why what is that I pray Madam? + +_Ara._ His Will, Sir, wherein he makes me his sole Executrix. + +_Spr._ Will! why what the Devil does he mean, seriously I can't find it +out? + +_Ara._ Why, Sir, he's gone to fight. + +_Spr._ How fight, Madam! On my Soul then I believe _Friendly_'s Second. + +_Ara._ You're in the right, he is so, and I am lost for ever! + +_Cla._ O foolish _Friendly_, this thy Mistake has made me the most +wretched of Woman-kind! Such variety of Thoughts load my afflicted +Breast, that I know not what to think: I rave, am mad, not knowing what +my Folly may produce; I fear for both, for both my Heart does bleed. + +_Ara_. Miserable Maid! nay, miserable Wife! but much more miserable +Widow! O my dear _Bonvile_! + +_Spr._ Duce take me, if e're I saw a Company so Phlegmatick in all my +Life: Mr. _Venter_, prethee let's have a Song, to pass away the Time, +and put Life into the Bride. + +Mr. _Ven._ With all my Heart, Mr. _Spruce_: Here, who waits?--Call in +the Musick, and desire 'em to oblige the Ladies with a new Song. + +[_Servant Enter and Exit._ ] + +_Cla._ Your self, Sir, you mean? + +_Spr._ Nay all of us I protest. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ay, ay, all of us. + +_Enter Musick and others who sing._ + +A Dialogue set by _Seignior Baptist_. + + Man. _A Woman's Love_ Woman. _And Man's is such,_ + Man. _Still too little,_ Wom. _Or else too much._ + Wom. _Men are Extreams,_ Man. _And Women too,_ + Wom. _All, all are false,_ Man. _All, All like you._ + Wom. _You'll swear and lie,_ Man. _If you'l believe,_ + Wom. _And sigh and die,_ Man. _Yet still deceive._ + Wom. _Your Vows and Oaths_ Man. _Your Smiles and Tears,_ + Wom. _Are all but Baits,_ Man. _Are all but Snares._ + Wom. _To win a Heart,_ Man. _And then destroy,_ + Wom. _The easy Fool,_ Man. _The promis'd Joy._ + +Another Strain. + + Wom. _I'le have you offer no more your Pretending,_ + Man. _Nor will I suffer your modish Dissembling:_ + Wom. _For Honour commands,_ + Man. _And Freedom withstands,_ + Wom. _What you?_ + Man. _And you._ + Wom. _I know wou'd have me be, your Slave,_ + Man. _I know wou'd have me be, your Slave._ + Wom. _O, no, no, no!_ + Man. _No, no, no, no!_ + Wom. _I never will agree,_ + Man. _I ever will be free._ + +_After the Song enter Justice_ Merryman, Summerfield, _and three or four +Sailers._ + +_Mer._ Daughter, Daughter! Where's my Daughter? I say, Where's my +Daughter? O Girl, I have the best News to tell you---- + +_Ara._ What of my Husband, Sir? + +_Mer._ No, no, of your Cousin, Girl, of your Cousin. + +_Ara._ What of him, Sir? + +_Mer._ Such a Cousin, Girl, such a dear Cousin he is, as _Alexander the +Great_, if he were alive, might be proud and boast of. + +_Ara._ You're welcome here again, Sir; You've made but a short Voyage, +pray what occasion'd your Return so speedily? + +_Sum._ Madam, I render you ten thousand Thanks; Your Generosity and +Goodness has wholly made me yours; I am the humblest of your faithful +Admirers. + +_Ara._ Forbear such lavish Gratitude; You'r too profuse in your +Acknowledgment of your small Favours. But pray be brief, and let me know +the happy Occasion of this your sudden Return, I long methinks to hear +it. + +_Sum._ Madam, you may command me--Not to molest the Company with the +Recital of every vain and needless Circumstance; 'twas briefly thus. +Scarce had we passed by _Marget_ on our Course, when on a sudden, from +the Top-mast head, a Sailer cries, All hands Aloft, three Sails ahead: +With that we rumidg and clear our Deck, our Gun-room arm'd, and all +things now are ready for a Fight. The Ships before descried, with +warlike Stems cut the resisting Waves, whilst from their Pendants +fluttering in the Air, we found they were three _Dunkirk_ Privateers; +they having made our English Cross advanced, salute us with a +Broad-side, to make us strike and yield: But we, who ne're knew as yet +what 'twas so cowardly to yield, and not regarding their unequal Odds, +fell boldly on, returning Fire for Fire. The Engagement then grew +desperate, for they on either Side fired in amain, whilst we withstood +their Force. At length they boldly grappled, and laid us close aboard, +and we as bravely beat them off again. + +_Mer._ But now, Daughter, mark what follows, for that's worth all, +I'faith it is; therefore go on, dear Cuz, go on. + +_Sum._ Sea-room at length we got; when (as Fate wou'd have it) an +unlucky Shot struck both the Captain and Lieutenant dead. Then we began +to fear, and all our noble Hearts were trembling with despair. + +_Mer._ No, no, not all Daughter--But you shall hear more--Ods bobs you +shall. + +_Sum._ How cou'd it be otherwise, when both our Commanders now were +lost? therefore to strike was all the Talk---- + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, now Daughter, now comes the Play, the other was only the +Prologue. + +_Sum._ But Fortune favouring, and the Wind springing a fresh Gale, we +got clear off and try'd to make a running Fight. + +_Mer._ Ay, but Cuz, how did we do all this? by whose Order and +Direction? + +_Sum._ Pardon me, Sir, 'twas of so small Moment, that already it has +slipt my treacherous Memory. + +_Mer._ Oh, ho! has it so! Ha, ha, ha! But it has not mine, I thank you, +no marry has it not, as you shall hear--Then he, with an undaunted +Spirit, started up amongst the Sailers, and---- + +_Sum._ Nay pray Sir---- + +_Mer._ By the Foot of _Pharaoh_ I'll not be balkt; he, I say, with an +Heroick Voice cried out, Courage brave boys, Charge and Discharge amain; +come I'll supply your fall'n Captain's place. At this blest News they +all fell on again, with ten thousand times more Fury than before: +Victory, Victory, was all their cry, whilst he my Cousin here, whom I +shall ne're forget, for by the Lord, methinks, I see him in the Fight +this very Instant, now running this way, now running that way, now down +to the Gun-room to encourage those that fought there; now upon the Deck +again, still crying out, Fear not, brave Boys, the Day will soon be +our's. + +_Sum._ O pray, Sir, let me intreat you to forbear, you make me ashamed, +I protest, to hear you. + +_Mer._ Ashamed, say you? Ha, ha, ha! + +_Ara._ Good Sir, go on. + +_Mer._ I will, I will--At length the proud French swallowing too many of +our English Balls, two of 'em very fairly cried, Your Servants +Gentlemen, farewel, and down they went. The other having lost most of +her Men, resolved to leave us; but we being too nimble, overtook her, +clapt some Men aboard, and brought her in a Prize: And this my brave Man +of War here, was the first that boarded her with Sword in Hand. + +_1 Sailer._ Of all this I was an Eye-witness. + +_2 Sailer._ And so was I. + +_3 Sailer._ And I, and all of us. + +_Mer._ Yes, and many more stout Boys besides. + +_Spruce._ Sir, we are all indebted to your Valour; such Voyages as +these, from small Venturers, in time may make us great Merchants. + +_Mer._ Well, never was Fight better managed before, that's certain. + +_1 Sail._ No, never, never! + +_2 Sail._ Better, say you? No nor half so well. + +_3 Sail._ If it were in our Power, we'd make him Admiral, so we wou'd. + +_Sum._ Gentlemen, 'tis to your Valours all, that I am indebted for the +Honour I have gain'd: And that I may not seem wholly ungrateful, there, +there's something in token of my Thankfulness. + +[_Gives 'em Money._ + +_1, 2, 3 Sailers._ Heaven bless your Worship. + +_Ara._ Come Cousin, we'l withdraw into the Parlour: And if these honest +Friends will be pleased to drink what our House affords, they shall be +welcome. + +_1 Sail._ Thank you Mistress with all our Hearts. + +[Exeunt _all but Sailers_. + +_2 Sail._ Well, this Mr. _Summerfield_ is a brave Fellow, Gadzooks he +is. + +_3 Sail._ Ay _Tom_ so he is; had it not been for him, we had all been +taken on my Conscience. + +_1 Sail._ On my Soul and so we had: O if you had but seen him when he +boarded the _Monsieur_, 'twou'd have made you laugh 'till you had split +your Sides. He came up to the Captain o'this fashion with a Slap--ha! +and gave him such a back-handed wipe, that he cut off his Head as +genteely, as tho he had served seven Years Apprenticeship to't. + +_Enter Servant with a Bowl of Punch._ + +_Serv._ Gentlemen, Mr. _Summerfield_ desires ye to be merry, and has +sent you this to drink his Health. + +_1 Sail._ O, the Lord bless him, he's a fine Gentleman, and so pray tell +him, and withal give him our hearty Thanks; Dost hear Boy? + +_Serv._ Yes, yes, I will. + +[_Exit._ + +_2 Sail._ What is't Brother? + +_3 Sail._ Punch by this Light! + +Omnes. _Hoo-ra; Hoo-ra; Viva_ Mr. _Summerfield, Viva, Hoora._ + +[The first Sailer takes the Bowl of Punch, walks in state round the +Stage, and sings; the others all follow.] + + _Here's a Health to jolly_ Bacchus, + _Here's a Health to jolly_ Bacchus, + _Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho._ + _For he will merry make us,_ + _For he will merry make us,_ + _Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho._ + _Then sit ye down together,_ + _Then sit ye down together._ + +[_They all sit down with the Bowl in the middle._ + +_2 Sail._ Pshaw! Pox o'th' this old Song, prithee let's have a Dance. + +_3 Sail._ With all my Heart; strike up Musick. + +_The Sailers and their Wives dance._ + +After the Dance. + + 1 Sail. _So, well done my Lads, now let's aboard amain,_ + _And suck our Faces o're and o're again._ + _Brandy we've got enough, by this blest Chance,_ + _We'l nothing drink but Punch, when we get_ France. + +_Omn._ Hoora! Hoora! Exeunt omnes. + +_The End of the Third ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Fourth. + +_A Tavern._ + +[2 Tables, three Chairs to each.] + + +_Enter_ Compasse, Peg, _and_ Pettifog. + +_A Drawer Meets them._ + +_Drawer._ Welcome Gentlemen. Please to walk into a Room? + +_Compasse:_ Aye Boy. Come Mr. _Pettifog_, please you sit. + +_Pettifog:_ With all my Heart; Come Mistress. + +_Draw._ What Wine will you be pleased to drink, Gentlemen? + +_Pett._ Ask the good Woman: speak Mistress. + +_Com._ Canary for her; I know what relishes her Palat best. A Quart of +brisk Canary, Boy. + +_Draw._ Ye shall have the best in _England_.--Coming, Coming, Sir. + +[_Exit._. + +_Com._ What call you this same Tavern, Mr. Attorney? + +_Pett._ The King's Head, Sir. + +_Com._ The King's Head: Marry, it has a good Neighbour of _Guild-hall_. +It takes many a fair Pound upon that 'n Account, I warrant you. + +_Draw._ (within) A Quart of Canary in the King's-head, score. + +_Enter Drawer, fills a Glass, and gives it_ Compasse. + +_Draw._ Sir, Here's a Glass of the richest Canary that ever came over, +the very Quintessence of the Grape I assure you. + +_Com._ Say'st thou so? Why then there's a Tester for thee, and so leave +us--. Come, Mr. _Pettifog_, [_Exit Drawer_] and 't please you my Service +to you. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Pett._ I thank you kindly, Sir.--Mrs. my Service to you, your Husband's +good Health. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Peg._ With all my Heart indeed, Here my dear black ey'd Rogue, thy +n'own good Health. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Com._ Thank you _Peg_, thank you, so now let's mind our Business. + +_Enter Mr._ Ventere, _his Wife, and_ Dodge, _to another Table in the +same Room._ + +Mr. _Ven._ Show a Room, Drawer. + +_Draw._ Here Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ne're a private Room? + +_Draw._ No Sir, the House is full. + +_Com._ Ods fish, whom have we here, my Wife's Merchant, with his Lawyer? + + +_Pett._ Ye know we promised to give him a Meeting here. + +_Comp._ 'Tis true we did so,--but come to the Business in hand. + +[_Pettifog_ and _Compasse_ talk privately. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, bring us a Bottle of your best Red. + +_Draw._ You shall have it, Sir. + +[_Exit_ Drawer. + +Mr. _Ven._ And what do you think of my Cause, Mr. _Dodge_? + +_Dodge._ O we shall carry it most certainly: You have Money to go +through with the Business; and ne're fear but we'll trounce them +swingingly. + +Mr. _Ven._ I warrant you think it very strange, Mr. _Dodge_, that I am +at this Charge and Expence to bring a farther Charge upon me. + +_Dodge._ Not I, I assure you, Sir, for I know you are a wise Man, and +know very well what you do; besides you have Money, Money enough, Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Why the short and the long of the Business is this; I made a +Purchase lately, and in that I did estate the Child (about which I'm +sued) Joint-Purchaser with me in all the Land I bought. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Right Husband; and you know 'twas I that advised you to make +the Purchase, and therefore I'll never give my Consent to have the Child +brought up by such a stinking Tar-barrel as now sues for him; he'd only +bring him up to be a Swabber; no, no, he was born a Merchant and a +Gentleman, and he shall live and die so. + +_Dodge._ You are a worthy Gentlewoman upon my word; there are but few of +such a noble Temper: But what makes the Fool of the Husband then so +troublesome; does he not know when he's well? + +Mrs. _Ven._ So 'tis a sign. + +_Dodge._ A Blockhead, to proclaim his own Disgrace, and make himself +laugh'd at. + +Mr. _Ven._ That's not it, he hopes to be the better by what is settled +on the Boy. + +_Dodge._ O, God's so, that's true: But never fear, I'll be hang'd if he +carry it, for you have Money, as I told you, Sir, before: but see, Sir, +there they are. + +Mr. _Ven._ Yes, Yes, I saw them before: but come, where's our Wine? +(_Within_) [the Bell rings as at the Bar. + +_Enter Drawer with a Bottle of Wine._ + +_Draw._ Here Sir,--Coming, Coming, Sir: _Philip_, speak up in the +Mermaid, and bid _Jack_ light a Fire. + +[_Exit_ Drawer. + +_Comp._ Well Mr. _Pettifog_, and what think you of my Suit, Sir? + +_Pett._ Why look you Sir, the Defendant you know was arrested first by a +_Latitat_ in an Action of Trespass. + +_Comp._ Yes, and a Lawyer told me, it shou'd have been an Action of the +Case, did he not, Wife? + +_Peg._ I have no Skill in the Law you know Husband, but the Gentleman +did say so. + +_Pett._ Aye, but your Action of the Case in this Point is too ticklish. + +_Comp._ Well, but pray tell me, do you think I shall overthrow my +Adversary? + +_Pett._ Without all doubt, the Child he says is none of yours, What of +that! I marry a Widow, and am by Consequence possess'd of a Ward. Now +shall not I have the Management of that Ward? Now Sir you lie at a +stronger Ward, for _Partus sequitur ventrem_, says the Civil Law: So +that if you were within the Compass of the four Seas, as the Common Law +goes, the Child must be yours, that's certain. + +_Comp._ Say you so, Sir? Why then the Child's my own, for I have been a +Coaster these five Years and more; and so my Service to you: [Drinks]. O +your Attorneys in _Guild-hall_ have a rare time on't, by the Lord +_Harry_. + +_Peg._ They are as it were both Judg and Jury themselves. + +_Comp._ And O how they will laugh at their Clients when they sit in a +Tavern, and call them Fools, Blockheads and Coxcombs, and then whip up +their Causes as nimbly as a Barber trims his Customers on a +_Christmas-Eve_; a Snip, a Wipe and away. + +_Pett._ That's very common, you shall have the like at a _Nisi-prius_. + +_Enter Drawer._ + +_Draw._ Here's a Gentleman, one Mr. Justice _Merryman_, enquires for Mr. +_Ventere_ the Merchant. + +Mr. _Ven._ Here Boy, desire them to walk up. [_Exit_ Drawer.] 'Tis my +Brother, and a Counsellor, to make an End of this same Business. + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman _and a Counsellor; both Tables rise and join +together._ + +_Merr._ Your Servant, Gentlemen, your Servant: Counsellor _Blunder_ and +I have been canvasing the Business of this your Difference; and I +believe, Brother, the Law will determine it as we have done; for it is +point blank against you. + +Mr. _Ven._ If it is, I must be contented: Well Sir, the Child's your +Wife's, and you shall have it; and to endear you the more to't, I'll +settle my part of the Estate on you and yours for ever: Give me your +Hand. + +[_They shake Hands._ + +We now are Friends. + +_Merr._ Why that's well said. + +_Couns._ We all are Witness to the Agreement. + +_Omnes._ All, all. + +_Comp._ Nay I scorn to be outdone in Civility; therefore if you please I +have a Gallon or two of Prize-Wine, and half a Dozen of good sound +_Bruges_-Capons, which I'll treat you and this good Company with at +Supper; but no more Mutton, no not a bit. + +_Merr._ Well Brother, I'm glad you're Friends: Ods bobs I am. But come, +let's home now, and see what's become of the Bride and Bridegroom: +Farewel Friend, farewell: Come we'll pay at the Bar. + +[_Exeunt_ Merr. _Mr._ Vent. _and his Wife,_ Couns. _and_ Dodge. + +_Comp._ Come _Peg_, Come and kiss me. + +[_Compass_ kisses Peg. + +I am Friends with thee too now. + +_Pett._ Aye, aye, you have Reason, she has earn'd you a good Fortune; +and need not venture to Sea any more: Yet one thing let me advise you, +'tis Counsel worth a good Fee, for it cures Cuckoldom. + +_Comp._ Sayst thou so, come let's hear it. + +_Pett._ This it is, Make a flat Divorce between your selves, be you no +longer her Husband, nor she your Wife: Two or three Hours after meet +again, salute, woo and wed afresh, and so the base Name of Cuckold's +blotted quite. This has been experienc'd and approved by many. + +_Comp._ 'Tis excellent i'faith,--There, there's for you; and I thank +you. _Peg_, I renounce thee,--nay and I renounce my self too from thee; +thou art now a Widow, _Peg_; I'll go hang my self two or three Hours at +one o' th' Main Yards, and so long thou shalt go drown thy self. Then +we'll meet in _White-Chappel-Fields_, as it were by chance, and woo and +wed again. + +_Peg._ With all my Heart, kind Sir, fare you well. + +_Comp._ Farewel Widow, remember Time and Place, and d' you hear, Put on +your Sabbath-day best Clothes. + +_Peg._ I will, I will. + +[_Exit Peg._ + +_Comp._ Sir, I am beholding to you for your good Counsel. + +_Pett._ No, Sir, you have paid me for 't, but I hope you do not intend +to follow your own. + +_Comp._ What is that? + +_Pett._ Why, you said you'd hang your self. + +_Camp._ No no, I have thought better on't, for I'll go drink my self +dead drunk, then wake again, wash my Face, and meet the Bride. + +_Pett._ That's well said, and I'll accompany you, and wish you Joy. + +_Comp._ Joy, Sir, I have it Sir already, in a good Estate got by a +Chopping Boy. + +[_Exeunt._ + + +SCENE II. + +_Enter_ Friendly solus. + +_Fri._ Was ever Fortune like to this of mine? Who for the Smile of a +vile simple Woman, have acted thus against my very Soul, all to please a +Creature, whose next Command perhaps will higher mount, it may be light +on my self, as now it did on _Bonvile_. + +_Enter_ Clara. + +_Cla._ Ha! _Friendly_ here alone. Now, now, my Fears begin. + +[_Aside_. + +So, Sir, you are return'd I see. + +[_To him._ + +_Fri._ Madam, I am, and like those noble Knights in former times, after +subduing all their Ladies Foes, returning with the joyful News of +Conquest, receive her trembling to their longing Arms, and claim her as +their own, so I----. + +_Cla._ What mean you, Sir? + +_Fri._ Madam, You are obeyed, your hard Commands fulfilled; at your +Request I've kill'd my Friend, nay and my best of Friends. + +_Cla._ How? kill'd your Friend for me. + +_Fri._ Indeed 'tis true. + +_Cla._ Then thou art truly wretched: But say, say quickly, who's this +unhappy Man whom thy Mistake hath thus untimely kill'd? + +_Fri._ _Bonvile._ + +_Cla._ _Bonvile_ said you? My Blood with an unusual Course runs backward +from my Heart! Horror has seiz'd my Soul! A thick-black Mist has +overcast my Sight, and I am not the same: but speak, O speak again, Was +it _Bonvile_? + +_Fri._ Why shou'd you seek to iterate my Guilt, by a Rehearsal of that +dreadful Name? Too sure, alas! It was: _Bonvile_'s the Friend I've +kill'd. + +_Cla._ Curs'd be the Tongue that spoke it, but doubly curs'd the Hand +that did the barbarous Fact. + +_Fri._ Why Madam, was it not your Command to kill my Friend; nay more, +my best of Friends? + +_Cla._ Yes, and I thought my self your best of Friends. + +_Fri._ I hope you wou'd not have had me murder'd you? + +_Cla._ No, Monster, no. + +_Fri._ These are Riddles. + +_Cla._ Fool, our whole Sex is made of nothing else: Thou mayst sooner +untie the Gordian Knot, expound the Problems of the monstrous _Sphynx_, +and read what is decreed in the mysterious Book of Fate, than unfold a +Woman's sly malitious Meaning. + +_Fri._ Very well; she first set me on to do this most accurs'd of Deeds, +and now upbraids me; nay wou'd hang me for 't: These are the Tricks of +all her damning Sex. O Woman, Woman, Woman, dear devilish Woman, +farewel. + +[_Offers to go._ + +_Cla._ Stay _Friendly_, all I have said was only to try your Constancy; +and whether you'd repent of what you've done. But tell me truly, is +_Bonvile_ surely dead? + +_Fri._ Indeed he is. + +_Cla._ 'Tis bravely done, and I adore thee for 't. By Heaven I love thee +now, even unto Dotage! + +_Fri._ Was ever Change like this? The subtlest Labyrinth Wit cou'd ere +invent, affords not half so many Turnings as a Woman's Mind. + +[_Aside._ + +What mean you, Madam, by this seeming Transport? + +_Cla._ O _Friendly_, _Friendly_, I am all o're Extasy! Thou hast done a +Deed that ravishes my Soul. At once thou hast kill'd my dear and only +Friend, and slain the fatal'st Enemy I had. + +_Fri._ What more Riddles Madam, pray explain your self. + +_Cla._ I will; I will declare a Secret which till now I never did +disclose: I lov'd that _Bonvile_ whom thou now hast slain, not as I +ought to do, but with a Woman's Love, which he never did know: And +Yesterday when I beheld the fatal Marriage ended, then like a Merchant +walking on the _Downes_, sees a rich Vessel of his own engaged, and +after took, and born away a Prize: So I, after I'd seen my _Bonvile_ +lost, (for so he was to me) resuming all the Malice of a Woman, resolved +never to entertain one Thought of Love again; but lead a Life as +_Lapland_ Witches do, only on others Ruines: Then when you approached me +with the hateful Sound of Love, to dash your Hopes, and put a Period to +your growing Passion, I bid you kill your best and dearest Friend? + +_Fri._ True. + +_Cla._ Now the best Friend to one in Love, is Love it self. + +_Fri._ O my curs'd Stars, that wrap'd me up in such a black Mistake, +What have I done? + +_Cla._ Done! Why you have done bravely, why do you tremble? + +_Fri._ An inward Guilt lies heavy on my Soul, and Horror with all her +dreadful Forms still haunts my Sight. And did you love this _Bonvile_? + +_Cla._ The Queen of Beauty never doted more on her beloved _Adonis_ than +I on him. + +_Fri._ And now as much you hate him: O the unheard-of Inconstancy of +Women! All that they have is feign'd; their Teeth, their Hair, their +Blushes, and their Smiles; nay their very Conscience (if any such they +have) is feign'd; all counterfeit and false: Let them wash, patch and +daub themselves with all the Helps for Nature that Art cou'd e're +invent, still they are Women: And let 'em rob all _India_ of its store +to adorn themselves therewith, still are they not all that thing call'd +Woman: I know not what to do, for I love and hate this Creature both at +once. + +_Cla._ What ails my _Friendly_? + +_Fri._ But _Bonvile_ yet must feel his Enemies Rage; shall he succeed in +Love, whilst I am cross'd in mine? No, it must not, cannot, nay it shall +not be. + + _Four Heads I have, to make a Plot not common; + Malice, Revenge, the Devil, and a Woman._ + +[_Offers to go._ + +_Cla._ What will you leave me then? + +_Fri._ Leave thee; yes, forever: Fly thee as I wou'd a Blast from Hell: +Thou art thy self a Hell; thy base detested hateful Woman's Breath +infects the purest Air: + + _May my Friend's Blood, which I for thee have spilt, + Light on thy Head, and your's be all the Guilt._ + +[_Exeunt_ severally. + +_Enter_ Compasse _new clothed_, Pettifog, _and two or three Men +Neighbors._ + +_Comp._ Gentlemen and Neighbours, as you have been Witnesses to our +Divorce, so shall ye now be Evidences to our next Meeting, which I look +for every Minute. + +1st _Neigh._ I came for that Intent, Neighbour. + +_Comp._ I thank you: well, I do not think but you'll all see me come off +with as smooth a Forehead, and make my Wife as honest a Woman as a Man +wou'd desire sometimes, I mean of her Rank; and a teeming Woman, as you +know she has been: Nay, I do not think but the Child too will be found +to be as lawful a Child as any Couple of unmarried People can beget. + +2d _Neigh._ We long to see it Neighbour _Compasse_, that so some of us +may do the like upon the same occasion. + +_Comp._ You're in the right, old Stitch of the World: But soft, see +where she comes with a whole Bundle of as good sound Maidens as her +self. + +_Enter_ Peg _new cloth'd, with three or four Women Neighbours._ + +Stand aside a little, and mind me I pray. + +_Omnes._ Agreed, agreed. + +_Comp._ Good Morrow fair Maid. + +_Peg._ In truth Sir you are mistaken in both, for I am neither fair, nor +yet a Maid. + +_Comp._ No, what are you then I pray, a Wife? + +_Peg._ That indeed I was, but alas,--I am now a Widow. + +_Comp._ A Widow say you? Nay then I must make bold with you; for look +you, your Case is somewhat like mine, I being a Husband without a Wife. + +1st _Neigh._ Aye neighbour, this is something like. + +_Pett._ They begin well, let them go on. + +_Comp._ How long have you been a Widow, good Woman? Nay pray do not weep +forsooth. + +_Peg._ I can't choose but cry, to think of the great Loss I had. + +_Comp._ Why, was he an honest Man? + +_Peg._ Honest quoth a', I vow and protest he was as honest a Man as e're +broke Bread. O I shall never have such another. + +[_Cries out._ + +_Comp._ By my Faith now Mistress you have had a great Loss indeed, for +an honest Man is not to be found every where, nor in every Street. + +_Pett._ The Rogue's witty. + +2d _Neigh._ Aye, aye, let 'em go on. + +_Comp._ And how long is it since you lost this honest Husband? + +_Peg._ O dear, his Memory is too fresh; and the Sight of you doubles my +Sorrow. + +_Comp._ The Sight of me, say you; why, was he so like me? + +_Peg._ As one Apple to another; your two Hands are not more alike. + +_Comp._ Nay then I cannot blame thee to weep: An honest Man he was I +warrant him; and you have had a mighty Loss, that's the Truth on't: But +was he proportioned like me, so well limb'd, and of such a wholesom +Complexion, heh! + +_Peg._ No Twins were ever more alike. + +_Comp._ Well I love, his Memory is still better and better: and how many +Children did he leave behind him? + +_Peg._ Only one, Sir. + +_Comp._ A Boy or a Girl? + +_Peg._ A dainty fine Boy, Sir. + +_Comp._ Just my own case still; my Wife (rest her Soul) left me a Boy +too, a lusty chopping Boy of his Age (as they tell me, for I never saw +it). + +_Peg._ So is mine. + +_Comp._ And what Profession was your Husband of? + +_Peg._ A Seaman. + +_Comp._ Heigh! my own Faculty too! And can you like a Man of that +Profession again? + +_Peg._ Yes surely, for his dear sake, whom I lov'd so tenderly, I shall +always esteem a Sailer. + +_Comp._ Shall you so? why then here's your Man: What say you, Is't a +Match? + +_Peg._ Dear me, I am so ashamed, and yet to speak the Truth, I do like +you hugely, and wou'd like you better still, if it were not for one +thing, which a little troubles me. + +_Comp._ What's that? + +_Peg._ Why, you know sometimes we are forc'd to endure the Absence of +our Husbands a long while, mehappen many Years, and then if there be any +Slip in us, (as long Vacations will make Lawyers hungry) the World is +apt to censure and scandalize us; and brand us with wanton Living and +Incontinency; when alas! if they wou'd but consider our Condition, and +the mighty Longings we often naturally have for Flesh and Blood, they +wou'd not blame us, so they wou'd not. + +_Comp._ Come, come, no Matter, canst thou love me, Widow? + +_Peg._ Ah, if I durst but speak my Mind, I know what I wou'd say. + +_Comp._ Durst, why who do you fear? here's none but an honest Gentleman, +some few Friends and Neighbours; let them hear a God's Name what you +wou'd say, and never blush for the Matter. + +1st _W. Neigh._ Aye, aye, speak Neighbour, pray speak your Mind, and +fear not. + +_Peg._ I shall be thought too weak to yield at first Sight. + +2d _W. Neigh._ Paw! paw! that's only Nicety. + +_Peg._ Well then I do love him dearly and dearly, so I do. + +[_Runs and kisses him_. + +_Comp._ And I thee with all my Heart and Soul. + +[Comp. _kisses_ Peg. + +Now we'll be merry, and have a Song, shall we not my Neighbours? + +3d _Neigh._ Marry will we, Neighbour _Luff_ and Mrs. Bride, will ye give +us a Song? + +_Peg._ With all my Heart, come Neighbour. + + A DIALOGUE. + + Man: + + _Faith and Troth I love thee dearly, + Tho I do but bluntly woo, + Prithy then resolve me clearly, + Whether I am beloved by you. + Long I shall not keep a pother, + Like a senseless whining Beau; + If you won't I'll court another + Who will never say me no._ + + Woman: + + _Friend, your self, nor Humour neither + With my Fancy disagree, + Yet I must find clearer Weather + Er'e I venture out to Sea. + Court another at your Pleasure + Win her in the Honey-moon, + She may chance repent at leisure, + For believing you too soon._ + + Man: + + _Leave your damn'd Fantastick Trials, + Which procure a Lover's Pain, + Pox upon these sham-Denials, + 'Tis but spending time in vain. + With Embraces happy make me, + Nature fram'd you to be kind; + Kiss me, and the Devil take me + If I ever change my Mind._ + + Woman: + + _I'll pursue the good old Fashion, + Practise still by those are wise, + Throughly try my Lover's Passion, + E're I let him grasp the Prize. + Spite of Oaths you wou'd forsake me, + Shou'd I let you once embrace: + If I kiss, the Devil take me, + Till the Parson has said Grace._ + + Chorus. + + _Since then Nation + Has made it a Fashion, + Let's send for a Black Coat, whilst we're in the Mind. + But it is damn'd Slavery, + And Priestly Knavery, + That Parsons must conjure e're Lovers be kind._ + +_Com._ So, so, here now shall we be Man and Wife again to Morrow, as +good as ever. What thô we met as Strangers, we may happen to love ne're +the worse for all that--Gentlemen and Neighbours, I invite ye all to my +Wedding. + +_Omnes._ We'l not fail you, and wish you Joy. + +_Com._ Did I not tell you that I would fetch it cleverly off? Let any +Man call me Cuckold if he dares now. + +_Petti._ 'Tis slander in him I assure you who-ever does. + +_Com._ Nay it will be _Petti Lacenary_ at least, and without Compass of +the General Pardon too: And for the Child, let me hear him that dares +say, I am not the Father. + +_Petti._ Sure none will dare dispute it. + +_Com._ Or that my Wife that is to be, is not as honest a Woman as some +other Mens Wives are. + +_Petti._ No question of that. + +_Com._ O how fine and smooth my Brows are now! + +_1 M. Neigh._ Aye but when you're married, they'll come to themselves +again I warrant ye. + +_Com._ My Friends, if you please, you may call me Mr. Bridegroom now, +for the Guests are all bidden to the Wedding. + +_1 M. Neigh._ We know it, Mr. Bridegroom, they are Indeed, and we'll not +fail you upon our Words. + +_Comp._ + + _Come then, brisk Widow, e're the next Ebb and Tide, + I'le be thy Bridegroom, and thou sha't be my Bride._ + +_Exeunt omnes._ + + +_The End of the Fourth ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Fifth. + + +_Enter_ Arabella _on one Side_. + +Summerfield _meeting her from the other_. + +_Ara._ Mr. _Summerfield_, I now am truly happy, my Prayers at last are +heard; and Heaven has restored my Husband to my Arms. + +_Sum._ I just now heard the joyful News, and thought to have been my +self the welcome Messenger of his Return, but find I'me come too late; +have you seen him? + +_Art._ No; as yet I have not. + +_Sum._ 'Tis somewhat strange! + +_Ara._ Others perhaps may judg it so, but my uncommon Joy for his +Return, admits no other Thought, but those of Transport for his Safety. + +_Sum._ O happy _Bonvile_! How I admire and wonder at thy Choice! + +_Enter_ Friendly. + +Madam, a Wife like you, exceeds the greatest Blessing sure on Earth. + +_Fr._ The nearest way to a secure Revenge, is private Malice, which, +like _Aside._ a Spark long lying hid amongst neglected Ashes, by the +least Blast of Wind becomes it self a Flame--Ha!, who have we here? +Thrice blest Occasion! which thus have offered me at once the Scope of +my revengeful Wishes. 'Tis _Arabella_ and her Darling _Summerfield_, one +who, in the Bridegroom's Absence, is grown thus intimate with his +beloved Bride. A strong Foundation on which I'll now erect a brave +Revenge; I'll step aside and observe them. + +[_Retires to one side of the Stage._ + +_Ara._ Sir, I hope he'll soon be here, and return the Kindness you have +shown me; so I take my leave, with hourly expectation of a much-long'd +for Husband. + +_Sum._ And I, with a Gratitude never to be forgotten, kiss your fair +Hand, and hope that all things will answer your Expectation. [_Exit_ +Arabella. + +_Fri._ Ay, 'tis so, now must I counterfeit a friendly Face to make a +farther Discovery. + +[_Aside._ + +Sir, your humble Servant: without Offence, may I be so bold as to beg +the Favour of your Name? + +_Sum._ The Question I must confess is somewhat familiar, and in my +Opinion improper for a Stranger at first sight; but yet I ne're disown'd +it to a Gentleman--'tis _Summerfield_. + +_Fri. Summerfield!_ Sir, I kiss your Hand;, and must congratulate your +good Success, but more admire your Valour. Had we many such noble +Commanders on board our Fleet, we need not fear it where e're it sails. + +_Sum._ Pray, Sir, stretch not your Love into Flattery, 'twill make me +then suspect your Kindness. And the Author of this Story was too much my +Friend I see, since he has given you this so very partial Account, the +more to augment my Fame. + +_Fri._ O! that's your Modesty, Sir: But if I might be so happy as to be +honour'd with your Acquaintance---- + +_Sum._ Sir, the Honour (if any) would be wholly on my Side; therefore I +desire to know your Name. + +_Fri._ _Friendly_, Sir. + +_Sum._ An Acquaintance; I suppose, of Mr. _Bonvile's_. + +_Fri._ One that thinks himself much honour'd in being stiled his Friend. + +_Sum._ I have often heard your Name indeed before; but till now Fortune +never afforded me the sight of you. + +_Fri._ You of all Men ought to bless Fortune, who still has been +indulgent to you on all Occasions; and scatter'd her Favours on you, +with as prodigal a Hand as thô you were her sole Care and only Minion. + +_Sum._ What mean you, Sir? Again you exceed the Bounds of Love and +Friendship; I never thought any of _Bonvil's_ Friends cou'd be guilty of +so base and vile a thing as Flattery: But, pray, unfold your meaning. + +_Fri._ 'Tis this; I just now saw you part with the Bride, with such +courteous Actions, as spoke no small Esteem in her kind Favour; and +therein I think you the happiest of Men. + +_Sum._ How! + +_Fri._ Mistake me not, I only as a Friend applaud your Happiness, bless +the Influence of your kinder Stars, and praise your Fortune that hath +given you this sweet Occasion. + +_Sum._ What Occasion, Sir? + +_Fri._ Of being serviceable to the fair Virgin Bride in her extreamest +need, after her being so unkindly left, nay, on her Wedding Day, by an +ungrateful Husband, in doing her those neglected Duties, her Youth and +Beauty justly did demand. + +_Sum._ On my Life some Plot against the Bride: I'll sound him 'till I +find the very Bottom--[_Aside._]--Sir, you are merry: But suppose the +Case your own, wou'd you have miss'd so tempting an Occasion? + +_Fri._ No, Sir, they're too precious to be omitted: But I hear you two +call Cousins, comes your Kindred by the _Merryman's_ or the _Bonvile's_? + +_Sum._ Neither! we were wholly Strangers 'till of late, and 'tis a word +of Courtesy only interchange'd between us for some private Reasons. + +_Fri._ This goes as I cou'd wish. [_Aside._] + +_Sum._ I desire you not to grow too inward with me, on so short an +Acquaintance: Not that I'de have you think the Lady of so base a +Disposition to grant me any thing beyond the Rules of Decency and +Honour. The only Favour I e're receiv'd from her, was a Present of those +Bracelets she wears about her Arms, and that Chain of Gold and Pearl she +has about her Neck; all which either of us may own without a Blush. + +_Fri._ How, the Chain and Bracelet, say you! Those were the first Tokens +of her Husband's Love. + +_Sum._ Methinks you look concern'd at what I've said; yet I have said no +more than what I am obliged in Honour to maintain, and will: therefore I +hope, as you'r a Gentleman, you'l not turn Informer. + +_Fri._ O pray think not so poorly of me. + +_Enter a Servant who whispers_ Summerfield. + +_Sum._ Tell her I'le wait on her immediately. + +[_Exit Servant._ + +Sir, some Business of Importance calls me hence; therefore some other +time I hope I shall have the Happiness of enjoying your Company longer. + +[_Exit_ Sum. + +_Fri._ Sir, your humble Servant. +Tell her I'll wait on her immediately, said he; this must be _Arabella_ +that he's going to: Better still. + + _The Work's begun, now I am made or lost; + He runs the best who holds out to the Post: + And all the Comfort in Adversity, + Is to see others as miserable as me._ + +Who have we here? Old _Merryman_! As I live 'tis he! + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman. + +_Mer._ O Master _Friendly,_ you're happily returned: But where's my +Son-in-Law? + +_Fri._ Alas, Sir, the unhappy _Bonvile_ is---- + +_Mer._ Is, is, what is he? Heh! speak; is he living, or is he dead; or +what's become of him? + +_Fri._ O! that I had the Marble _Niobes_ Heart! Or that I had suck'd the +Milk of Wolves and Tigers; so that I might have told, without the least +remorse of Sorrow, what now I dare not, nay, I cannot speak, for fear at +once I melt my self in Tears, and break your aged Heart. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Mer._ Then I suppose he's killed; say, is he not? Hast thou inticed him +from his Bride for this, thou inhumane Wretch? Yet speak, and tell me +truly, for I'm prepared to hear the worst of Ills; Is he then slain? + +_Fri._ No, Sir, but dangerously wounded. + +_Mer._ Not mortally, I hope; but whereabouts is he so desperately +wounded? In his Arms, his Legs, or Body? + +_Fri._ Neither, Sir, but in as perfect Health as when he left you. + +_Mer._ Strange! sure thou art all o're a Mystery, and form'st these +Riddles to try my Wit. + +_Fri._ No, Sir, for all I have said, you in effect will surely find I +told you he was wounded, did I not? + +_Mer._ Yes, you did. + +_Fri._ And so he is. + +_Mer._ But where, whereabout, I ask you once again? + +_Fri._ I see you force the unwilling Secret from me--Why, he's wounded. + +_Mer._ He's wounded, he's wounded, but where, where is he wounded? + +_Fri._ In his Fame, Honour and Reputation, more mortal than a thousand +fleshy Wounds. + + _For such slight Baubles, Cures are oft obtain'd; + But injur'd Honour ne're can be regain'd._ + +_Mer._ How! how! how's this? wounded in his Honour, fay'll thou? Tell me +the Villain that has defam'd him, and this good old Sword shall slit the +Rascal's Wind-pipe. + +_Fri._ O, Sir, your Daughter, your Daughter, Sir---- + +_Mer._ Ha! what's that? what's that? is she injur'd too? + +_Fri._ No, no Sir, my falling Tears quite drown my feeble Voice, I +cannot utter what I fain would speak--Your Daughter's false, false to +her _Bonvile_! And by the help of her beloved _Summerfield_, has robb'd +my Friend of all he cou'd call Dear, I mean his Fame. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Mer._ A Pox o' your Crocodile's Tears. Why, Sirrah, Sirrah, do you call +my Daughter Whore? Hey, Swords and Daggers, Blunderbusses and Pistols, +shall I bear this? Hark you, you my Friend, and no Friend, what a Kin do +you take me to be to this Gentlewoman, Heh? + +_Fri._ Her Father, Sir. + +_Mer._ Audacious Villain, O that I had thee in some private Corner, +where none you'd either see or hear us, this Sword shou'd justify my +Daughter's Honour; I'de Whore you with a Pox to you, so I wou'd. + +_Fri._ Your Pardon, Sir, I only did inform you as a Friend, that by your +fatherly Admonitions, you might refrain her from her undecent Course. + +_Mer._ Pox o' your friendly Intelligence. + +_Fri._ The Jewels which her Husband did present her, as the first Sign +and Confirmation of the happy Contract, she to my certain Knowledg has +given to---- + +_Mer._ To whom, to whom thou wicked Slanderer? tell me, Sarrah, quickly, +quick, quick. + +_Fri._ To _Summerfield_. + +_Mer._ Ha, ha, ha, the Fool makes me laugh; Ha, ha, ha, why 'twas but +just now that I saw e'm on her Neck and Arms. + +_Fri._ She was no Woman, had she not the Sense to get them against her +Husband's coming. + +_Mer._ But pray tell me, how is't possible that she cou'd part with 'em, +when they are lock't on, and the Key with her Husband? + +_Fri._ O, Sir, that's no Question to be ask'd in these Times: Women +_have found a way to make use of other Keys besides their Husbands: And +no doubt but_ Summerfield _has got a Key will open your Daughter's lock +as well as_ Bonvile's. + +_Mer._ Sirrah you lie, you lie Sirrah; and I'le tell thee thou ly's, +again and again, so I will. Nay, and I were to pay a 100 Pounds for +every Lie I give thee, as Men do Twelve-pence for every Oath they swear, +I wou'd spend all the Thousands I am worth, in giving thee the Lie. 'Tis +likely indeed, that such a brave Gentleman as _Summerfield_, that fought +at Sea like a Dragon to save my Life, should shorten my Days on Land in +ruining my Daughter; therefore once more I tell you you Lie. + +_Fri._ 'Tis very well. + +_Me._ Do you hear Sir, have you told this Lie to any body else but me? + +_Fri._ I am no Informer, Sir. + +_Mer._ Why then for fear you shou'd, do ye see, draw, [_Draws_] Draw, I +say, I am not so old but I can make a shift to cut your Throat still; +I'le spoil your Carking, I'le warrant ye. + +_Enter_ Bonvile _and_ Clara. + +A Pox on't, here's my Son-in-Law come to hinder me, Duce take him cou'd +he not stay a little longer? D'ye hear Sir, begon, leave this Place +immediately, or I'le--I'le--I'le--Gad I cou'd find in my Heart, so I +cou'd, but be gone. + +_Fri._ _Bonvile_ here with _Clara_ too, excellent. This goes to +_Arabella_, and may it encrease the Storm. + +[_Exit_ Frie. + +_Bon._ My Father in Anger. + +_Mer._ O Son, Son, Son! dear Boy, welcome home, Od's bobs you are. + +_Bon._ I humbly thank you, Sir; but am sorry to see you so disturb'd. + +_Mer._ Nothing, nothing, only Mr. _Friendly_ and I have had a Word or +two, that's all, that's all. + +_Bon._ About my going with him, I suppose; but that's past, and I hope, +Sir, you'l be so kind as at my Request to pardon him. + +_Mer._ Indeed Son it was something else; By the Lord _Harry_ I can't +forbear laughing at the Coxcomb, Ha, ha, ha; He told me, Ha, ha, ha, +that one _Summerfield_, a very honest Fellow as ever liv'd, is grown +exceeding familiar with my Daughter, your Wife. + +_Bon._ Ha! my Wife. + +_Mer._ Yes, your Wife, and that he had received Love-Tokens from her. + +_Bon._ How, Love-Token from her! + +_Mer._ Aye, aye, Love-Tokens I call'd 'em when I was a young Man: Nay, +the Rogue was so impudent to tell me, that she had given him those +Jewels which are lock'd about her Neck; Ha, ha, ha. + +_Bon._ The Jewels about her Neck, said you? + +_Mer._. Aye, what ails you Man that you change Colour so? 'Tis all a Lie +Boy I warrant thee: And hadst thou not come just in the Nick of Time, I +think o' my Conscience I shou'd have cut his Throat. + +_Bon._ As I will your Daughters if I find her false: Death, Hell, and +Furies, am I made a Monster already? + +_Cla._ What, Sir, are you return'd for this? + +_Mer._ Hark y' son, hark you; suppose that this Mr. _Friendly_ shou'd +have a secret Inclination to your spouse, d' ye see; and therefore, by +reason he can't obtain his Desire, possesses you with Jealousy to make a +Breach 'twixt you and your Wife. Od's bobs, I don't know, I can't tell +what shou'd be the meaning of his carrying you away on your Wedding-Day, +else, heh, Son, heh. + +_Cla._ Has the Italian Plague then infected you, that you stand thus +unmov'd? + +_Enter_ Summerfield _leading_ Arabella. + +But see here's your Bride. + +_Bon._ And her beloved Adulterer with her! Death and Damnation, must I +stand still and see this? + +_Mer._ Hey day! what the Matter now? + +_Ara._ _Bonvile_ here with _Clara_! Alas too true I find what before I +scarce dar'd to think was so. Is _Bonvile_ then a Traitor, and false to +_Arabella_? + +[_Aside._ + +_Cla._ Madam, at last I've found the pretious Jewel that you so long +have sought in vain. + +[To _Arab._ + +_Ara._ Wear it your self Madam, I lost it, and it must be mine no more. + +_Cla._ What means this sudden Alteration? + +_Mer._ Ods bodikins, as you say, what does she mean? Are ye both mad, +heh? + +_Sum._ Sir, I'm come to pay my Respects to you, and humbly beg a farther +Knowledg of----. + +_Bon._ Of whom, sweet Sir, my Wife or me? + +_Sum._ Ha! your Wife. + +_Bon._ Yes Sir, my Wife, I think the word needs no explaining. + +_Mer._ Pray, Sir, at my Request bear with him, he's strangely out of +Order I assure you. + +_Bon._ The Jewels are as I left 'em ; but the Jewel of her Heart is lost +and thrown away.--Madam, I sent you my Will, did you receive it. + +_Ara._ Yes, I did. + +_Bon._ Let me see it. + +_Ara._ You shall. + +[_Exit_ Ara. + +_Bon._ Sir, I desire a Word or two in private with you, + +[_to_ Summer. + +_Sum._ With all my Heart, Sir. + +_Mer._ What's that, what's that, I'll have no Whispering, Gentlemen. + +_Enter_ Arabella _with the Will._ + +_Ara._ There's your Will, Sir. + +[_Throws it down,_ Bonvile _takes it up._ + +_Bon._ 'Tis well now as you've chang'd your Mind, I'll change this too, +and find another to supply your Place: There's no harm done, the +Marriage is not yet consummated, and you are free to enjoy any, so am I. + +_Ara._ As you please for that: A Man may make a Garment for the Moon, +count all the Stars which twinckle in the Skies, or empty the vast +Ocean, Drop by Drop, sooner than please a Mind so light, so various as +yours. + +_Mer._ Ods bobs, what's this you talk of, altering your Will? + +_Bon._ Yes, Sir, I am so resolved, and will see 't perform'd within this +Hour: My Lawyer lives hard by, and so farewel. + +[_Exit. Bon._ + +_Mer._ Farewel thou peevish Boy, I can alter my Will too so I can, marry +can I; I had left him 20000 Pound after my Death, and he shall see I can +find another Executor too. Within this Hour did he say, Gad I'll be with +one as soon as he, unless he rides Post to the Devil, and that's the +nearest way to a Lawyer. + +_Sum._ I'll follow him, and asswage his Passion. + +_Mer._ By no means, Sir.--But now I think on't, I'll go with you, and +find him out: But did you ever see the like, did you ever see the like? +Come Sir, come follow me + +[_Exit._ Merr. & Summer. + +_Cla._ Dear _Arabella_ what can all this mean? + +_Ara._ Can you be doubtful of the Effect, who are your self the Cause? + +_Cla._ I the Cause, Inform me how? + +_Ara._ O _Clara, Clara_, your Syrens Voice has drawn my _Bonvile_ from +these spotless Virgins Arms, and made me ever wretched! + +_Cla._ Who (if thou ever lov'dst me) tax'd me with a Crime so foul, as I +abhor to hear it only named? + +_Ara._ _Friendly._. + +_Cla._ O _Arabella_, forgive and pity me, who am indeed the innocent, +unhappy Cause of all those Griefs which now afflict you both; which I'll +relate in brief, if you will please to withdraw one Moment with me. + +_Ara._ With all my Heart. + +_Cla._ Come then: + + _And since your Ruine I did first conspire, + I'll all appease, thus Fire's expell'd by Fire._ + +[_Exeunt._ + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman _and_ Summerfield. + +_Mer._ Sir, do you take me for your Friend? + +_Sum._ Why d' you ask me such a Question, Sir? 'twere base Ingratitude +to entertain any other Thought. + +_Mer._ Why then d' ye see, Sir; as you are my Friend, you must not fight +my Son _Bonvile_. + +_Sum._ Not fight him Sir! you amaze me. + +_Mer._ Aye, aye, aye; that's all one: I understand your dumb Signs and +your low Whispers, the French Mode all over, to smile and grin a Man in +the Face, and at the same time privately cut his Throat. Therefore +prithe be ruled by me, and don't fight him, for shou'd you kill him, my +poor Girl wou'd break her Heart, quite break her Heart. [_Sobs and +cries._] I grant that you are wrong'd, and so I dare swear is my dear +Child: but he's her Husband, and must be born with, ods bobs he must. + +_Sum._ Heaven be my Witness, I ne're entertain'd a Thought like it! + +_Mer._ That's well, that's well, I am heartily glad on't, ods bobs I am +heartily glad. + +[Enter _Friendly_. + +But here comes one that has made all this Mischief; and him I'll fight +my self for all I'm a Justice of the Peace. Come, come, Sir, Draw, draw; +you'll belie my Daughter again wil you? Come, draw, I say, Draw. + +[_Draws._ + +_Fri._ Sir, as I am a Gentleman, I scorn to deny my Words, but there's +my Author, whether good or ill. + +_Mer._ Who, he? He, do ye mean him? + +_Fri._ Yes, Sir. + +_Sum._ True, Sir, I am; For, at his Return to Town from _Barn-Elms_, it +was my Chance to meet him; and after a ceremonious Complement or two, I +found him diving into my private Thoughts concerning the Bride your +Daughter: I, not to be behind-hand with him, join'd Wit with Wit to +sound his shallow Soul. I told him then, how her Jewels once were mine; +but the manner of my obtaining them, I for my own sake did conceal from +him; and now, if you're disposed, I'll here relate it. + +_Enter_ Bonvile _leading_ Arabella, Clara _and_ Spruce, _Mr._ Venter +_and Mrs._ Venter. + +_Mer._ Let it be before all this Company then: What, and my Son and +Daughter too so loving again? Nay then all's well, ods bobs it is, and +they shall hear it, ods bobs they shall. + +_Bon._ I have heard the Story, Sir, already; and _Friendly_, you I +pardon too, for Enemies in War take all Occasions to undo each other; +yet tho I am your Enemy, I'll be generous still, and make you Master of +your wish'd for Mistress. + +[_To_ Clara.] + +Come, Madam, receive this worthier Passion of your _Friendly_, whom I +know you both admire and love. + +[_Gives her to_ Friendly. + +Next I must obtain your Pardon for my Rashness. + +_Sum._ Sir, 'tis what I first ought to have begg'd of you: And that the +World may'nt tax this innocent Lady of a Crime to her purest Thoughts +unknown, I'll here begin my Story from my first Acquaintance to this +happy Hour. + +_Mer._ Prithy do. + +_Sum._ The first time that I e're beheld her Face, I wou'd have robb'd +her. + +_Mer._ Ah Rogue! What, a Thief, a Thief, what wou'd you have robb'd her +of? + +_Sum._ Not her Honour, I assure you, Sir, but only of those Jewels which +she wears. + +_Mer._ Ods bobs, thou wert an honest Thief, for that I faith he was. + +_Sum._ They being fast, I cou'd not get 'em off without some Harm and +Pain to her: which for the _Indies_ I'd not have done. And she, in +answer to my Civility, brought me home, and ransom'd them with the full +Price in Gold, (with which I made my Venture) and the more to hide my +Shame, she honour'd me with the Title of her Kinsman. + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, and so she might well; for she was a little cunning Thief +too, to steal the Gold she gave you from her Husband; 'twas all his now, +but that's no matter, proceed. + +_Sum._ The rest you know already, Sir. + +_Mer._ Ay, so I do, ods bobs I do, thy Valour my brave Boy, thy Valour, +for which I'll do for thee, that thou shalt never need to rob again I +warrant thee; ods bobs I will. But come, come, we lose time, for we have +another Wedding yet to be perform'd, but that shall be done within. + + Sum. _Then farewel all ye treacherous Paths of Vice, + Which lead Men blindfold to their End, + In time like me repent you that are wise, + And by Restraint your vicious Courses end._ + + Ara. _Were I to ask of Heaven its greatest Bliss + On Earth, it cou'd bestow not one like this. + After a Storm the Sun still shines most bright, + And from the Chaos sprung the purer Light._ + + Bon. _A Day like this sure yet has never been, + Wherein such various Changes e're were seen. + Fortune to Day that work'd my Overthrow, + Has made me happy in a Minute now. + Bless'd with a vertuous Wife my Days I'll spend, + And ne're trust Man, lest I mistake my Friend._ + + + + +EPILOGUE, + +Spoke by the City-Bride. + + + _You met with good Intention to be witty, + And rally the Grave Cuckolds of the City; + But disappointed of your Recreation, + I in your Looks can read the Play's Damnation. + Lord! how ye stare to find an honest Bride, + A thing you think a Monster in_ Cheapside. + _Whither you boast that you so often come, + And leave your footmen to perform at home. + Yet 'tis no little Comfort t' us howe're, + You oftner bring th' Estate than get the Heir. + Unjustly therefore you your Fortune blame, + She's kinder to your Blood that to your Name._ + + _After all this, I know you think it Pity, + That I shou'd break the Custom of the City: + I hear a Beau cry, 'tis some damn'd Mistaker; + A_ Cheap-side _Vertue, City Cuckold maker. + This is a Fault no Gentleman can pardon, + It gives_ Cheapside _the Sins of_ Covent-Garden: + _We must refine on Vice, and take new Measures, + Since dull chain'd Cits invade our darling Pleasures._ + + _Take my Advice, employ at home your Backs, + Or_ Locket's _Revels may revenge_ Pontack's: + _This Cuckolding to you's a losing Trade, + That pay for making, and for being made. + The Ladies will my Character excuse, + And not condemn a Vertue which they use._ + + _If any here be guilty of Transgression, + 'Tis of Necessity, not Inclination: + They'd be contented in their proper Houses, + Cou'd they reform their unperforming Spouses. + Yet if some wanton Appetites there be, + How many are there that can fast like me. + Those are enow, if I have their Applause, + The Poet has his End, and I my Cause. + + +FINIS. + + + + +PUBLICATIONS OF THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY + + +FIRST YEAR (1946-47) + +Numbers 1-4 out of print. + +5. Samuel Wesley's _Epistle to a Friend Concerning Poetry_ (1700) and +_Essay on Heroic Poetry_ (1693). + +6. _Representation of the Impiety and Immorality of the Stage_ (1704) +and _Some Thoughts Concerning the Stage_ (1704). + + +SECOND YEAR (1947-1948) + +7. John Gay's _The Present State of Wit_ (1711); and a section on Wit +from _The English Theophrastus_ (1702). + +8. Rapin's _De Carmine Pastorali_, translated by Creech (1684). + +9. T. Hanmer's (?) _Some Remarks on the Tragedy of Hamlet_ (1736). + +10. Corbyn Morris' _Essay towards Fixing the True Standards of Wit, +etc._ (1744). + +11. Thomas Purney's _Discourse on the Pastoral_ (1717). + +12. Essays on the Stage, selected, with an Introduction by Joseph Wood +Krutch. + + +THIRD YEAR (1948-1949) + +13. Sir John Falstaff (pseud.), _The Theatre_ (1720). + +14. Edward Moore's _The Gamester_ (1753). + +15. John Oldmixon's _Reflections on Dr. Swift's Letter to Harley_ +(1712); and Arthur Mainwaring's _The British Academy_ ( 1712). + +16. Nevil Payne's _Fatal Jealousy_ (1673). + +17. Nicholas Rowe's _Some Account of the Life of Mr. William +Shakespeare_ (1709). + +18. "Of Genius," in _The Occasional Paper_, Vol. III, No. 10 (1719); and +Aaron Hill's Preface to _The Creation_ (1720). + + +FOURTH YEAR (1949-1950) + +19. Susanna Centlivre's _The Busie Body_ (1709). + +20. Lewis Theobold's _Preface to The Works of Shakespeare_ (1734). + +21. _Critical Remarks on Sir Charles Grandison, Clarissa, and Pamela_ +(1754). + +22. Samuel Johnson's _The Vanity of Human Wishes_ (1749) and Two +_Rambler_ papers (1750). + +23. John Dryden's _His Majesties Declaration Defended_ (1681). + +24. Pierre Nicole's _An Essay on True and Apparent Beauty in Which from +Settled Principles is Rendered the Grounds for Choosing and Rejecting +Epigrams_, translated by J. V. Cunningham. + + +FIFTH YEAR (1950-51) + +25. Thomas Baker's _The Fine Lady's Airs_ (1709). + +26. Charles Macklin's _The Man of the World_ (1792). + +27. Frances Reynolds' _An Enquiry Concerning the Principles of Taste, +and of the Origin of Our Ideas of Beauty, etc._ (1785). + +28. John Evelyn's _An Apologie for the Royal Party_ (1659); and _A +Panegyric to Charles the Second_ (1661). + +29. Daniel Defoe's _A Vindication of the Press_ (1718). + +30. Essays on Taste from John Gilbert Cooper's _Letters Concerning +Taste_, 3rd edition (1757), & John Armstrong's _Miscellanies_ (1770). + + +SIXTH YEAR (1951-1952) + +31. Thomas Gray's _An Elegy Wrote in a Country Church Yard_ (1751); and +_The Eton College Manuscript._ + +32. Prefaces to Fiction; Georges de Scudéry's Preface to _Ibrahim_ +(1674), etc. + +33. Henry Gally's _A Critical Essay_ on Characteristic-Writings (1725). + +34. Thomas Tyers' A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson (1785). + + + + +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library: University of California + +THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY + +_General Editors_ + +H. RICHARD ARCHER William Andrews Clark Memorial Library + +E.N. HOOKER University of California, Los Angeles + +R.C. BOYS University of Michigan + +JOHN LOFTIS University of California, Los Angeles + +The Society exists to make available inexpensive reprints (usually +facsimile reproductions) of rare seventeenth and eighteenth century +works. The editorial policy of the Society continues unchanged. As in +the past, the editors welcome suggestions concerning publications. All +income of the Society is devoted to defraying cost of publication and +mailing. + +All correspondence concerning subscriptions in the United States and +Canada should be addressed to the William Andrews Clark Memorial +Library, 2205 West Adams Boulevard, Los Angeles 18, California. +Correspondence concerning editorial matters may be addressed to any of +the general editors. The membership fee is $3.00 a year for subscribers +in the United States and Canada and 15/- for subscribers in Great +Britain and Europe. British and European subscribers should address +B. H. Blackwell, Broad Street, Oxford, England. + + +Publications for the sixth year [1951-1952] + +(At least six items, most of them from the following list, will be +reprinted.) + +THOMAS GRAY: _An Elegy Writt in a Country Church Yard_ (1751). +Introduction by George Sherburn. + +JAMES BOSWELL, ANDREW ERSKINE, and GEORGE DEMPSTER: _Critical Strictures +on the New Tragedy of Elvira_ (1763). Introduction by Frederick A. +Pottle. + +_An Essay on the New Species of Writing Founded by Mr. Fielding_ (1751). +Introduction by James A. Work. + +HENRY GALLY: _A Critical Essay on Characteristic Writing_ (1725). +Introduction by Alexander Chorney. + +[JOHN PHILLIPS]: _Satyr Against Hypocrits_ (1655). Introduction by Leon +Howard. + +_Prefaces to Fiction._ Selected and with an Introduction by Benjamin +Boyce. + +THOMAS TYERS: _A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson_ ([1785]). +Introduction by Gerald Dennis Meyer. + +Publications for the first five years (with the exception of NOS. 1-4, +which are out of print) are available at the rate of $3.00 a year. +Prices for individual numbers may be obtained by writing to the Society. + + +THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY +_WILLIAM ANDREWS CLARK MEMORIAL LIBRARY_ +2205 WEST ADAMS BOULEVARD, LOS ANGELES 18, CALIFORNIA + +Make check or money order payable to THE REGENTS OF THE UNIVERSITY OF +CALIFORNIA. + + + +--------------------------------------------------------------+ + | Transcriber's Notes & Errata | + | | + | Spellings of names, abbreviations and a number of other | + | words, punctuation including the use of apostrophes, use of | + | accents, hyphenation and italicisation are very inconsistent | + | in the text. They have been transcribed as in the text, | + | except for very obvious typographical errors. | + | | + | In the Preface, the underlined words have been represented | + | as italicised words. | + | | + | Superscripts in the Preface have been preceded by carat | + | characters. | + | | + | Embedded stage directions in the text have been left in | + | situ, enclosed in square brackets. | + | | + | End-of-line and centred stage directions in the text have | + | been placed on their own lines. | + | | + | The following words occur in both hyphenated and | + | unhyphenated forms in the text. The number of instances of | + | each word are given in parentheses. | + | | + | |Cheap-side (1) |Cheapside (2) | | + | |Hoo-ra (2) |Hoora (3) | | + | |me-thinks (2) |methinks (4) | | + | |Merry-man (2) |Merryman (10) | | + | |who-ever (1) |whoever (1) | | + | | + | The following obvious typographical errors have been | + | corrected. | + | | + | |Error |Correction | | + | |is is |is | | + | |wihin |within | | + | |the |thee | | + | |the the |the | | + | |Names |Name | | + | |Speaker's name omitted. |Fri. | | + | |Salvage |Savage | | + | | + +--------------------------------------------------------------+ + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The City Bride (1696), by Joseph Harris + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + +***** This file should be named 22974-8.txt or 22974-8.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/2/9/7/22974/ + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The City Bride (1696) + Or The Merry Cuckold + +Author: Joseph Harris + +Commentator: Vinton A. Dearing + +Release Date: October 12, 2007 [EBook #22974] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + + + + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + +</pre> + + +<p class='b fm'><span style='font-size:180%;'>The Augustan Reprint Society</span><br /><br /> + +<span style='font-size:130%;'>JOSEPH HARRIS</span><br /><br /> + +<span class='i' style='font-size:120%;'>The City Bride</span><br /> + +<span style='font-size:120%;'>(1696)</span></p> + +<p class='b fm'>With an Introduction by<br /> +Vinton A. Dearing</p> + +<p class='fm'>Publication Number 36</p> + +<p class='fm'>Los Angeles<br /> +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library<br /> +University of California<br /> +1952</p> + +<hr class='minor' /> + +<p class='fm'>GENERAL EDITORS</p> + +<p class='fm'><span class='sc'>H. Richard Archer</span>, <i>Clark Memorial Library</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Richard C. Boys</span>, <i>University of Michigan</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Robert S. Kinsman</span>, <i>University of California, Los Angeles</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>John Loftis</span>, <i>University of California, Los Angeles</i></p> + +<p class='fm'>ASSISTANT EDITOR</p> + +<p class='fm'><span class='sc'>W. Earl Britton</span>, <i>University of Michigan</i></p> + +<p class='fm'>ADVISORY EDITORS</p> + +<p class='fm'><span class='sc'>Emmett L. Avery</span>, <i>State College of Washington</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Benjamin Boyce</span>, <i>Duke University</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Louis Bredvold</span>, <i>University of Michigan</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>James L. Clifford</span>, <i>Columbia University</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Arthur Friedman</span>, <i>University of Chicago</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Edward Niles Hooker</span>, <i>University of California, Los Angeles</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Louis A. Landa</span>, <i>Princeton University</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Samuel H. Monk</span>, <i>University of Minnesota</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>Ernest Mossner</span>, <i>University of Texas</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>James Sutherland</span>, <i>University College, London</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>H. T. Swedenberg, Jr.</span>, <i>University of California, Los Angeles</i></p> + +<p class='fm'>CORRESPONDING SECRETARY</p> + +<p class='fm'><span class='sc'>Edna C. Davis</span>, <i>Clark Memorial Library</i></p> + +<hr /> +<h2>Table of Contents</h2> + +<ul class='off'> +<li><a href='#INTRODUCTION'>INTRODUCTION</a><span class='ralign'><a href="#Page_i">i</a></span></li> +<li><a href="#PROLOGUE">PROLOGUE</a><br /></li> +<li><a href="#Dramatis_Personae">Dramatis Personæ</a><br /></li> +<li><a href="#ACT_I">ACT I</a><span class='ralign'><a href="#Page_1">1</a></span><br /></li> +<li><a href="#ACT_II">ACT the Second</a><span class='ralign'><a href="#Page_9">9</a></span><br /></li> +<li><a href="#ACT_III">ACT the Third</a><span class='ralign'><a href="#Page_18">18</a></span><br /></li> +<li><a href="#ACT_IV">ACT the Fourth</a><span class='ralign'><a href="#Page_29">29</a></span><br /></li> +<li><a href="#ACT_V">ACT the Fifth</a><span class='ralign'><a href="#Page_38">38</a></span><br /></li> +<li><a href="#EPILOGUE">EPILOGUE</a><span class='ralign'><a href="#Page_46">46</a></span><br /></li> +</ul> + +<hr /><p class='pagenum'><a name="Page_i" id="Page_i">[i]</a></p> + +<h1><a name="INTRODUCTION" id="INTRODUCTION"></a>INTRODUCTION</h1> + +<p><span class='u'>The City Bride</span>, by Joseph Harris, is of special interest as the only +adaptation from the canon of John Webster to have come upon the stage in the +Restoration. Nahum Tate’s <span class='u'>Injur’d Love: or, The Cruel Husband</span> is an adaptation +of <span class='u'>The White Devil</span>, but it was never acted and was not printed until +1707. <span class='u'>The City Bride</span> is taken from <span class='u'>A Cure for a Cuckold</span>, in which William +Rowley and perhaps Thomas Heywood collaborated with Webster. F. L. Lucas, +Webster’s most recent and most scholarly editor, remarks that <span class='u'>A Cure for a +Cuckold</span> is one of the better specimens of Post-Elizabethan romantic comedy. +In particular, the character of the bride, Annabel (Arabella in Harris’s +adaptation), has a universal appeal. <span class='u'>The City Bride</span>, a very close copy of +its original, retains its virtues, and has some additional virtues of its own.</p> + +<p>Not much is known of its author, Joseph Harris. Genest first notices +him as playing Bourcher, the companion of a French pirate, in <span class='u'>A Common-Wealth +of Women</span>. Thomas Durfey’s alteration of <span class='u'>The Sea Voyage</span> from the Beaumont and +Fletcher folio, which was produced about September 1685. His subsequent +roles were of a similar calibre, but if he never rose to be a star he seems +to have become a valued supporting player, for in 1692 he was chosen to join +the royal “comedians in ordinary.” He did not at first side with Thomas +Betterton in his quarrel with the patentees of the theatre in 1694-5, but he +withdrew with him to Lincoln’s Inn Fields. Genest notices him for the last +time as playing Sir Richard Vernon in Betterton’s adaptation of <span class='u'>1 Henry IV</span>, +which was produced about April 1700.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_ii" id="Page_ii">[ii]</a></span> +During his career on the stage Harris found time to compose a tragi-comedy, +<span class='u'>The Mistakes, or, The False Report</span> (1691), produced in December 1690; +<span class='u'>The City Bride</span>, produced in 1696; and a comedy and a masque, <span class='u'>Love’s a Lottery, +and a Woman the Prize. With a New Masque, call’d Love and Riches Reconcil’d</span> +(1699), produced about March 1698/9. <span class='u'>The Mistakes</span> is clearly apprentice work, +for Harris acknowledges in a preface the considerable help of William Mountfort, +who took the part of the villain, Ricardo. Mountfort, who had already written +three plays himself, cut one of the scenes intended for the fifth act and +inserted one of his own composition (probably the last) which not only clarified +the plot but also elevated the character of the part he was to play. +The company seems to have done its best by the budding dramatist, for Dryden +wrote the prologue, a rather unusual one in prose and verse, and Tate supplied +the epilogue. Harris professed himself satisfied with the play’s reception, +but owned that it was Mountfort’s acting which really carried it off.</p> + +<p><span class='u'>The City Bride</span>, on the other hand, shows its author completely self-assured, +and rightly so. No doubt some of his ease comes from the fact that +he had nothing to invent, but in large part it must derive from his ten-years’ +experience on the stage. Harris added nothing to the plot of <span class='u'>The City Bride</span>, +although he commendably shifted its emphasis, as his title makes clear, from +infidelity to fidelity; but he rewrote the dialogue almost completely, and +the new dialogue is remarkable good. The reader will notice that it is, +except for the last half of the first act, printed as prose. The quarto of +<span class='u'>A Cure for a Cuckold</span>, from which Harris worked, is also largely printed as +prose, but has correct verse lineation in the same portion of the first act. +<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_iii" id="Page_iii">[iii]</a></span> +It is the more remarkable that Harris, following thus closely the apparent +form of his original, could vary from it so successfully. Most notable, +probably, are the passages in which he intensified the expression of his +source. They may indicate no more than the eternal “ham” in our author; +but I think they probably indicate as well a new style of acting, more +rhetorical in one way, more natural in another. A good example, in which +the new rhetoric is not oppressive, is the account of the sea fight at the +end of Act III. Even when Harris followed his original most closely, we +seem to hear the actor, speaking in a new tongue, in a more relaxed and +colloquial rhythm. The reader will find it both amusing and instructive to +compare the two versions of Act II, scene ii. The new cadences do more than +merely prove that Harris had no ear for blank verse.</p> + +<p><span class='u'>The City Bride</span> does not conform to the dominant type of Restoration +comedy, but it belongs to a thriving tradition. Domestic comedy, in adaptations +from the Elizabethans, had been staged at intervals for twenty years +before <span class='u'>The City Bride</span> appeared, and the type was of course destined to +supplant gay comedy in the near future. Harris was not, therefore, going +against the taste of the town; on the contrary he was regularly guided by +contemporary taste and practice. His stage is less crowded: he amalgamated +the four gallants of <span class='u'>A Cure for a Cuckold</span> in the person of Mr. Spruce, at +the expense of a dramatic scene (I, ii, 31-125); and he ended the sub-plot +with the fourth act instead of bringing its persons into the final scene, +with some loss of liveliness and a concomitant gain in unity of effect. He +modernized his dialogue entirely, bringing up to date the usage and allusions +<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_iv" id="Page_iv">[iv]</a></span> +of his original, and restraining the richness of its metaphor by removing +the figures altogether or by substituting others more familiar. He omitted +a good deal of bawdry, especially in Act II, scene ii. All these changes +have parallels in other Restoration adaptations. Again, the songs and dances, +which are all of Harris’s composition, reflect the demand of the Restoration +audience for excitement, variety, novelty, in their dramatic fare. When in +Act III, scene i, Harris meets this demand by making Bonvile bare his breast +to Friendly’s sword, and Friendly a little later grovel at Bonvile’s feet +for pardon, we may condemn the new business as bathetic; but when in Act IV, +scene i, he substitutes for Webster’s emaciated jokes the bustle of drawers, +the sound of the bar bell, and healths all around, we can only applaud the +change.</p> + +<p>We must also commend Harris for supplying a consistent and relatively +believable motivation for the main action. In both <span class='u'>A Cure for a Cuckold</span> and +<span class='u'>The City Bride</span>, Clare (Clara) begins the action by giving her suitor, +Lessingham (Friendly), a cryptic message: he is to determine who his best +friend is and kill him. In <span class='u'>A Cure for a Cuckold</span>, it is never made clear +whether the victim should have been Bonvile or Clare herself (she apparently +intended to trick Lessingham into poisoning her). This uncertainty has only +recently been noticed by students of the drama, who have been forced to +emend the text at IV, ii, 165 (see Lucas’s note on the passage). Harris’s +solution is simpler. He will have nothing to do with either murder or +suicide. Clara explains to Friendly that the best friend of a lover is love +itself.</p> +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_v" id="Page_v">[v]</a></span></p> +<p>This is not the place to enumerate all the differences between +<span class='u'>A Cure for a Cuckold</span> and <span class='u'>The City Bride</span>; indeed the reader may prefer making +the comparisons for himself. Harris’s alterations follow the general pattern +of Restoration adaptations from the earlier drama, it is true. On the other +hand, a relatively small number of such plays allow us to see the professional +actor feeling his way through the emotions and actions of the scenes. To +compare a play like <span class='u'>The City Bride</span> with its source is like visiting the +rehearsals of an acting company of the time. Such a play has an immediacy +and liveness that strongly appeals to those who delight to image forth the +past.</p> + +<p><span class='u'>The City Bride</span> has never been reprinted. The present edition reproduces, +with permission, the copy in the Henry E. Huntington Library, omitting Harris’s +signed dedication to Sir John Walter, Bart., on A2<sup>r</sup>-A3<sup>r</sup> (A1<sup>v</sup> in the original is +blank). The top line on page 44, which is partly cut away, reads: <span class='u'>Cla.</span> Who +(if thou ever lov’dst me ...</p> + +<p style='margin-left:70%; text-indent:0;'>Vinton A. Dearing<br /> +University of California<br /> +Los Angeles</p> + +<hr /> +<h1><span class='sf50'>THE</span><br /> +CITY BRIDE:<br /> +<span class='sf50'>OR,</span><br /> +The Merry Cuckold.<br /> +<span class='sf50'>A</span><br /> +COMEDY,</h1> + +<p class='fm'>Acted at the New Theatre, in <i>Little</i><br /> +<i>Lincolns Inn-Fields.</i><br /><br /> + +<span class='sf75'>BY</span><br /><br /> + +His Majesty’s Servants.<br /> + +<span class='sf75'><i>First Edition.</i></span></p> + +<p class='fm'><span class='bb bt'><i>Spero Meliora.</i></span></p> + +<p class='fm'>LONDON:<br /> +Printed for <i>A. Roper</i> and <i>E. Wilkinson</i> at the <i>Black-Boy</i>, and R.<br /> +<i>Clavel</i> at the <i>Peacock</i>, in <i>Fleet-street</i>. 1696.</p> + +<hr /> +<h2><a name="PROLOGUE" id="PROLOGUE"></a>PROLOGUE:<br /> +<i>Spoke by Mr.</i> THURMOND.</h2> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Three Ways there are, and all accounted fair,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">To gain your Favour: Begging, Borrowing, Prayer.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">If as a Beggar, I your Alms implore <span class='n ralign'>}</span><br /></span> +<span class="i0">Methinks your Charity shou’d aid the Poor; <span class='n ralign'>}</span><br /></span> +<span class="i0">Besides, I never beg’d of you before. <span class='n ralign'>}</span><br /></span> +<span class="i0">If I address by Prayer, and loud Complaints<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I then oblige yee, for I make you Saints;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And sure none here can think it Superstition,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">To pray to Saints that are of no Religion!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">If Invocation will not do my Work,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">A Man may borrow of a <span class='n'>Jew</span> or <span class='n'>Turk</span>;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Pray lend me Gentlemen your Applause and Praise,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll take it for as good as Currant Bays;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And if I ne’re repay it, ’tis no more,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Than many of you Sparks have done before:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">With this distinction, that you ran indebt<br /></span> +<span class="i0">For want of Money, we for want of Wit.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">In vain I plead! a Man as soon may get<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Mill’d Silver, as one favour from the Pit.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">——Hold then——now I think on’t,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll e’en turn Thief, and steal your kind Affection,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And when I’ve got your Hearts, claim your protection:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">You can’t convict me sure for such a crime,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Since neither Mare nor Lap-dog, I purloin:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">While you Rob Ladies Bosoms every day, <span class='n ralign'>}</span><br /></span> +<span class="i0">And filch their pretious Maiden-heads away; <span class='n ralign'>}</span><br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll plead good nature for this Brat the Play: <span class='n ralign'>}</span><br /></span> +<span class="i0">A Play that plagues no more the thread-bare Theme<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Of powder’d Beaux, or tricks o’th’ Godly Dame,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But in your humours let’s ye all alone,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And not so much as Fools themselves runs down.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Our Author try’d his best, and Wisemen tell,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">’Tis half well doing to endeavour well:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">What tho’ his poor Allay runs not so fine;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Yet, let it pass as does our present Coin;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">For wanting fairer Ore, and riches mould<br /></span> +<span class="i0">He stamps in Brass, what others print in Gold:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Smile on him but this time, the next perhaps,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">If he guess right he may deserve your Claps.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<hr /> +<h2><a name="Dramatis_Personae" id="Dramatis_Personae"></a>Dramatis Personæ.</h2> + +<div class='center'> +<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary=""> +<tr><td align='left'>Bonvile,</td><td align='left'><i>The Bridegroom</i>.</td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Boman.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Friendly,</td><td align='left'><i>His Friend, in Love with</i> Clara.</td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Thurmond.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Justice Merryman,</td><td align='left'><i>Father to</i> Arabella.</td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Bright.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Summerfield,</td><td align='left'><i>A Gentleman, but Younger Brother, necessitated to take the High-Way</i>.</td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Scudemore.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Ventre,</td><td align='left'><i>A Merchant.</i></td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Arnold.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Spruce,</td><td align='left'><i>A City Beau.</i></td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Bayly.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Compasse,</td><td align='left'><i>A Master of a Vessel.</i></td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Freeman.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>A Councellor.</td><td></td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Davis.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Pettifog,</td><td align='left' rowspan='2'><i>Two Attorneys.</i></td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Trefusis.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Dodge,</td><td align='left'><i>Mr.</i> Eldred.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='center' colspan='3'><i>Sailers, Neighbours, Drawers, Servants, Boys, Singers and Dancers.</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Arabella,</td><td align='left'><i>The Bride</i>.</td><td align='left'><i>Mrs.</i> Boman.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Clara,</td><td align='left'><i>Friendly’s Mistriss, but secretly in Love with</i> Bonvile.</td><td align='left'><i>Mrs.</i> Boutell.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'><i>Mrs.</i> Ventre,</td><td align='left'><i>The Merchant’s Wife</i>.</td><td align='left'><i>Mrs.</i> Lacy.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Peg,</td><td align='left'><i>Compasses Wife</i>.</td><td align='left'><i>Mrs.</i> Perin.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Nurse.</td><td></td><td align='left'><i>Mrs.</i> Lawson.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Lucy,</td><td align='left'>Clara’s <i>Maid</i>.</td><td align='left'><i>Miss</i> Prince.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='center' colspan='3'><i>Women Neighbours.</i></td></tr> +</table></div> + +<p class='noin c'>SCENE <i>London</i>.</p> + +<hr /><p class='pagenum'><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[1]</a></p> +<h1><span class='sf75'>THE</span><br /> +CITY BRIDE:<br /> +<span class='sf75'>OR, THE</span><br /> +Merry Cuckold.</h1> + +<h2><a name="ACT_I" id="ACT_I"></a>ACT I. SCENE the I.</h2> + +<blockquote><p><i>The Curtain draws up, and discovers several sitting at a Banquet. An Entertainment +of Instrumental Musick, Compos'd by Signior</i> Finger: <i>Then a Song, +set by Mr.</i> John Eccles, <i>and Sung by Young</i> La Roche.</p></blockquote> + +<p class='c'>SONG.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Many I’ve lik’d, and some Enjoy’d,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But if I said I Lov’d, I ly’d.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Inconstant as the wandring Bee,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">From once touch’d Sweets I us’d to flee;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Nor all the Power of Female Skill,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Cou’d curb the freedom of my Will:<br /></span> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Clarinda</span> only found the Art,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">To Conquer and so keep my Heart.<br /></span> +<span class='i ralign'>[After this a Dance, and then the Scene shuts.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd mt2'>Enter <span class='n'>Friendly</span> and <span class='n'>Clara</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Friend.</i> This <ins class='corr' title="Transcriber’s Note: The original showed ‘is is’.">is</ins> a Day of Mirth and Jollity my <i>Clara</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Clara.</i> ’Tis so, for such as can be merry, Mr. <i>Friendly</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Friend.</i> Why not for us my Love, we have a Noble President, and +methinks shou’d Imitate (thrô Envy) this their happiness.</p> + +<p><i>Clara.</i> I am not of your Opinion.</p> + +<p><i>Friend.</i> Why not my Fair?</p> + +<p><i>Clara.</i> I’ll tell you, because I purpose not to Marry.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[2]</a></span> +<i>Fri.</i> Prithee be serious, and reform that Thought: Think of my past Service, +and judge by that my future; weigh all the respect I have paid you long, and ever +lov’d you beyond my self.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> I know your Weakness, and will reward it too.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I am sure you will, you must be kind; And can you think an Answer of +this killing Nature, a just return for all my faithful Love?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> As to that I have already said.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Oh speak, from whence this Coldness doth arise! Be at least so kind as to +tell me that; Is it some late Disgust you have conceived of my Person; or rather +your desire, (I fear) of some unworthier, happy Creature, base in the Attempt, +as you unkind in thinking of a Change; if neither.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">I must impute it to your Woman’s Will,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Still pleased with what it fancies, Good or Ill.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Be’t what it will, thus it is, and with this Answer pray rest satisfied; +there is but one way ever to win me and draw me unto Marriage, which whosoever +finds, ’tis like he may have me, if not, I am still my own.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Oh name it then! Thou dearest Treasure of my Life! my Soul! my All! I +am in a maze of Extasie, to think there’s any means to gain you, and hope you’l +be so kind to tell me how I may be happy.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> I’ll retire a while; and with my self resolve what must be done, and in the +end send you my Resolution.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Clara</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I’ll here expect it: What more can I desire, than now be satisfied and know +my Dooom.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Suspence is the worst Torment we endure,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">’Tis Knowledge make the Wound both safe and sure.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Spruce</span> and Mr. <span class='n'>Venter</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Spru.</i> How now <i>Jack</i>! What all alone Man?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> No, for I have heard some say, Men are ne’re less alone, then when alone. +The reason I suppose is this, because they have Crowds of Thoughts, that still perplex +the Mind; which wou’d be, like the Soul retired and free, thereby to enjoy +that sweet repose, which nought but that can Grant.</p> + +<p><i>Spru.</i> Pshaw! Pox of this Morality and dull Stuff; Prithee let us be Merry, and +Entertain the Bride and Bridegroom. Ods fish there a parcel of rare Creatures +<ins class='corr' title="Transcriber’s Note: The original showed ‘wihin’.">within</ins>! But of all Mrs. <i>Clara</i> for my Money.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> And truly, I am of your Opinion Mr. <i>Spruce</i>; for setting aside her present +Melancholly and Discontent, I think she is beyond Comparison with any other.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Od’s nigs, I know the Cause of her Disorder.</p> + +<p><i>Ven.</i> What I pray?</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Why, I’ll tell ye; In all Conditions of Estates, Professions, and Degrees, in +Arts or Sciences, yee know there’s a kind of Envious Emulation.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> Right.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[3]</a></span> +<i>Spr.</i> So in this of <i>Arabella</i>’s Marrying; for <i>Clara</i> being Lady of much the same +Birth and Quality, Grieves I—suppose to see her Rival get the start of her.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> Troth like enough.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Y’are Pleasant Gentlemen—Or else because she having had so many +Courtiers——</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> And you among the rest <i>Jack</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> She now perhaps does cast a more favourable Eye upon some one that does +not like her.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Why Faith, and that may be too.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Lucy</span> with a Letter.</p> + +<p><i>Lucy.</i> Sir, my Mistriss presents her humble Service to you, and has sent you this +Letter; pray Heaven it be to your liking Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I thank the kind <i>Lucy</i>: There, there’s for the Postage Girle: [<i>Gives her Money.</i>] +She has kept her Promise for once I see; I’m resolved to read it, thô I were sure +my Death was Comprehended in it.</p> + +<blockquote><p class='hi'>Reads. <i>Try all your Friends, and find out the best and nearest to your Heart, That +done, be sure to kill him for my sake. This fail not to do, if you respect and Love +(as you pretend.)</i><br /><span class='ralign'>Clara.</span><br /></p></blockquote> + +<p>’Tis as I fear’d, and what I know she most desires: Mischief, and Murder, are all +her Sexes Practice, and Delight? Yet such is the Extravagancy of my Passion, I +must obey the Mandate, thô to my certain Ruine: ’Tis strangely difficult, and does +require Mature Deliberation.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> What has <i>Friendly</i> left us?</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> I believe the Letter was the occasion, it may be it was a Challenge.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> A Challenge! No, no; Women don’t use to bring Challenges, I rather believe +’tis an Amour; And that Letter as you call it a <i>Billet Deux</i>, which is to Conduct +him to the place appointed; and in some Sence you may take that for a +Challenge.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> And she the Civil Embassadress to usher him in.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Yes, yes, but see the Bride and Bridegroom, with the rest of the good +Company.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Justice <span class='n'>Merry-man, Bonvile, Arabella,</span> Mrs. <span class='n'>Venter</span> and others, +as Guests Invited to the Wedding.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Son <i>Bonvile</i>, what call ye the Gentleman we met at the Garden Door?</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> <i>Friendly</i> Sir, a most approv’d and worthy Gentleman, and one of my chiefest +Guests.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ay, ay, it may be so: But yet me thought he seemed somewhat displeased, +thô Son, Hah, What think you?</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> No sure Sir, he cannot be Angry, when his Friend’s so happy.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[4]</a></span> +<i>Mer.</i> I can’t tell Boy, but I believe there’s something more than ordinary in the +matter. Why should he leave the Company else? And Mrs. <i>Clara</i> I miss her too. +Why Gentlemen, why do you suffer this?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Unknown to any Sir, she withdrew soon as we rise from Table.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Sick of the Maid perhaps; because she sees you Mrs. Bride her Quondam +Play fellow Married before her; Heh Gentlemen, heh!</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> ’Troth like enough Brother <i>Merry-man</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Go, go, find her out for shame Gentlemen; and do not stand idle thus, +Od’s bobs, when I was a Young fellow and invited to a Wedding, I used to frisk +and Jump, and so bestir my self, that I made all the <i>Green-sickness</i> Girles in the Room +blush like Rubies. Ah, hah! I was a brisk Fellow in those Days, I’faith, and used to +Cut Capers a Yard high: Nor am I yet so Old, but I can take a round or two still—Come, +come Gentlemen, lets in again and firk it away, shall we not?</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> With all my Heart Mr. Justice.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Why that’s well said Mr. <i>Spruce</i>, Ods bobs it was, and I thank you heartily.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Come Madam, you must along with us, without you all’s nothing.</p> + +<p><i>Arab.</i> I’ll wait on you Gentlemen; if you will give me leave Sir.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[To <span class='n'>Bonvile</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Oh my best Joy! This Day you may Command.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> That’s right, that’s right I’faith Gentlemen! This Day she Commands, and +he for ever after. Ods bobs I have done so my self, and hope I shall do so still. +Sister <i>Venter</i>, May I presume to ask if my Brother can say as much?<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Bonvile, Arab. Spruce,</span> and the rest of the Guests.]</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Mrs. Vent.</i> Yes Brother, I think he may, I freely Give him leave.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Observe that Brother, she freely gives you leave: But who Gives leave the +Master or the Servant?</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> You are Merry Brother, and truly you have reason, having but one +Daughter and see her Married as you would have her.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Yes, I have one thank Heaven! You wou’d be glad Sister you cou’d say so, +but your Barrenness does give your Husband leave (if he please) to look for Game +elsewhere.</p> + +<p><i>Mrs. Ven.</i> Well, well Sir, thô you jeer me, and make a scorn of my Sterility—</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> No, no, not I Sister, I scorn not your Sterility, nor your Husbands Virility +neither.</p> + +<p><i>Mrs. Ven.</i> My Husband’s Virility! Pray spare my Husband; for he has not been +so idle as you imagin; He may have an—Offspring abroad for ought you know, +that you never heard of.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> Oh fye Wife, You will not make it publick will you?</p> + +<p><i>Mrs. Ven.</i> And yet he keeps himself within compass for all that.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> If you love me <i>Winny</i>—</p> + +<p><i>Mrs. Ven.</i> Na, I say no more, but thereby hangs a Tale.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Say’st thou so old Girle? What and has he been stragling then? Nay; nay +I know he is a Ventersome Man; And a—Merchant of small Wares sometimes, +especially when he can get a good Commodity: I love him the better for’t I’faith, +Ods bobs I do—A notable spark with a Young Wench in a corner, Is he not? +A true Chip of the old block, his Father I warrant him—But Sister, I have +something to say to you in private, concerning my Daughter.</p> + +<p class='sd'><i>Enter Nurse.</i><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[5]</a></span></p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> By your leave Good Folks, Is Master <i>Venter</i> the Merchant here I pray?</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> Oh Nurse! I am glad to see thee, How does my Boy?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Very well, I thank Heaven Sir! He grows bravely I assure you. ’Tis a +Chopping lad I promise you, and as like your good Worship; As if he had been +spit out of your Mouth.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> Softly, Nurse softly.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> I protest ’tis one of the forward’st Infants in the Universe; Lord! how it +will Crow, and Chirup like a Sparrow! I am afraid Sir he is about Teeth, for he +Dribbles extreamly, if so, Your Worship must provide him a Silver Corral with a +Whistle and Chain.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> Well, well, he shall have everything Nurse, my Wife shall send them +to ye; in the mean time, there, there’s a Piece, to buy <ins class='corr' title="Transcriber’s Note: The original showed ‘the’.">thee</ins> a Pair of Gloves, and +so leave us, for I am busie at present, therefore steal away behind me, and slip out +at the back Door.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Yes Sir, I am gone, Heavens bless your Worship, a Piece! Marry! and +that’s a sufficient Charm to lye up any Nurses Tongue in <i>Christendom</i>.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Ex. Nurse</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Just. Mer.</i> Well well, it shall be done: Come Brother we are mist I warrant you +amongst the Young Fry, let’s to ’um and, Dance till our Legs ake again, come I’ll +lead the way.</p> + +<p><i>Mr. Ven.</i> We follow you.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exeunt.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Friendly</span> Reading <ins class='corr' title="Transcriber’s Note: The original showed ‘the the’.">the</ins> Letter.</p> + +<p><i>Fr.</i> Heaven in its excess of Goodness, bestow’d no greater Blessing on Mankind +than that of Friendship—To Murder any one is a Crime unpardonable! <i>But a +Friend!—And of all Friends the nearest to my Heart</i>,—’Tis such an Imposition +that Hell it self ’till now cou’d never parallel; And yet this Devil of a Woman has +power over me beyond all Virtue. I am distracted in my Thoughts, and know +not what to do; yet something must be done without delay, or else I lose her quite: +And yet I fear ’tis most Impossible, for Friendship left the World, when Justice fled, +and all who now do wear that Name are the worst of Hypocrites,</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Like Counterfeited Coin on which is seen,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">The formal Stamp; but sordid Dross within.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Bonivile</span>.</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> My Friend alone and Thoughtful? say for what?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">That you alone appear with Discontent,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">When all my Friends Congratulate my Bliss?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Is it because (which I durst ne’re suspect)<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Your Love to me was not intirely true?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Or else perhaps, this Crown of Happiness<br /></span> +<span class="i0">You think Misplac’d, and Envy it not yours.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[6]</a></span><i>Fri.</i> Forbear such cruel Words—<br /></span> +<span class="i0">How can you entertain a Thought so Vile<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Of him whom so long you have call’d your Friend?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">May all the Blesings Heaven can bestow<br /></span> +<span class="i0">On us poor Mortals in this World below,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Crown all your Days, and may you nothing see<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But flowing Tides of sweet Felicity;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But I, alas!—<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Alas! What means my <i>Friendly</i>?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Much hidden Grief that wretched Word portends,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Which thus disturbs the Quiet of my Friend?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But come disclose it to me,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And since the Burthen is too much for one,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll bear a part to ease thy troubled Breast.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Oh <i>Bonvile</i>!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Seek not to force this Fatal secret from me—<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> I must know it, by my best hopes I must.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Oh no! I cannot, Nay I dare not—<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> How dare not trust a secret to a Friend?<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Oh <i>Bonville</i>, <i>Bonville</i>! Call me not your Friend,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">That <ins class='corr' title="Transcriber’s Note: The original showed ‘Names’.">Name</ins> strikes horrour to my very Soul.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Ha! Art thou then a Stranger to that Name?<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Indeed I am, and must be so for ever now.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Yet hear me <i>Friendly</i>; Deny me if thou can'st,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Fixt as a Rock, I vow I’ll here remain,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Until I have forc’d this Dire secret from thee.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Pardon me Sir, I hope you soon will hear it,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But I—— <span class='i ralign'>[Offers to go.]</span><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Yet stay, and since intreaty can’t prevail,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">By all the Friendship which you once profess’d,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">By all that’s Holy, both in Heaven and Earth,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I now Conjure thee to impart it to me,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Or by this Life——<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><ins class='corr' title="Transcriber’s Note: The original did not show the speaker’s name."><i>Fri.</i></ins> Hold, hold, and since I can no longer hide it<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Know ’tis my Honour then which lyes at Stake.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Thy Honour! How? Proceed.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> By chance a Quarrel happen’d to arise<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Betwixt another and my self, The Field,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Time, Place, and all appointed,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Nay Seconds must assist us in the Deed:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I have relied on many seeming Friends,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">(Such as profess the bare and empty Name)<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And all refuse to venture in my Cause.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Is this all?<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri</i> All, Is it not enough? To see my Reputation, (the Lifes Blood of my Soul)<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Nay all that’s Dear, in Danger to be lost.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[7]</a></span><i>Bon.</i> Not while thy <i>Bonvile</i> lives and wears a Sword:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">May all things frown that I wou’d have to smile,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">May I live Poor, and Dye despised by all,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">If I out live the ruine of thy Honour!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Tell me the time my Friend?<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Oh, spare me that, for, if once known the time,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">You’l Cancel this your promise, and recall<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Your Friendly proffer.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Away with these Excuses, come the time.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> At Seven this Evening.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> The place?<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> <i>Barn-Elms</i>:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Oh the fatal place! Where I too well foresee,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">The certain fall and Ruine of my Honour!<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> No, Thou shalt not stay to forfeit thy lov'd Honour,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Come I’m ready to assist my Friend; and will along with you.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Alas. What mean you?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Of all my Friends on you I ne’re Relied;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But sure I Dream, I Rave, by Heav’ns I’m Mad!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">My <i>Bonvile</i> leave his Wife? And on his Wedding Day?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">His Bride whom he perhaps may ne’re Enjoy?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And all for me? O most unhappy Man!<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Pleasure before my Friend I’ll ne’re prefer,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Nor is it lost, thô for a while, delay’d.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Are you then resolv’d to go?<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> I am as fixt in my Resolve as is the <i>Libertin</i> in vice,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Which Death alone can part.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Yet stay, and think what it is you undertake,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Recall this Rash and suddain Resolution,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Least you repent, alas when it is too late.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> This were enough to shake a weaker Soul,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But mine it moves not; like to a Mighty Oake,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’m plac’d above the Storms of Fear or Doubt.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Arabella</span>.</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Sir, no more, the Bride,<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Ara.</i> Oh, Heavens defend me!<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> What ailes my Dearest Life?<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Ara.</i> I’ve lost the Key of this Chain I wear about my Neck<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And of these Bracelets, Oh! Unhappy Omen!<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> No, no, my Love; I found it as it lay at Random in your Chamber, and +fearing it might be forgot, or lost, have laid it by; ’Tis safe my Love.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Indeed I’me very glad you’ve found it, but yet——<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[sighs.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Yet, What my Dear? from whence proceeds that sigh?</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Ara.</i> Alas, I know not!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Some busie Genius Whispers to my Soul,<br /></span> +<span class="i0"><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[8]</a></span>The loss of this upon my Wedding Day<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Portend’s a greater e’re the Day be past.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> Banish such Fears, let’s in and see our Friends.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Ara.</i> Indeed they all expect you; come I’ll lead the way.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> I’ll go with you. <i>Barn-Elms</i> you say?<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Aside to <span class='n'>Friendly</span>.</span><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Yes that’s the place, at Seven precisely;<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Bon.</i> I’ll meet you on the <i>Exchange</i>, and go together;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">If you are there before me, Take a turn or two.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Bonvile</span>, and <span class='n'>Arabella</span>.</span><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i2"><i>Fri.</i> Oh my Dear <i>Bonvile</i>! Art thou then the Man?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">The only, only Man that I can call Friend,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And only Friend that I am bound to Kill?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">A Friend, that for my sake wou’d stake his Life,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Leave a Chast Bride and untouch’d Nuptial Bed<br /></span> +<span class="i0">For me base Man, nay worse than Savage Beast:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">The generous Lyon, never kills his kind<br /></span> +<span class="i0">They say, althô provoked to utmost rage;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Yet I vile Monster, more ungrateful Man,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Thus unprovoked, must kill my Brother Creature,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And which is worse, my Dear and only Friend!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">All for the pleasure of a Foolish Woman.<br /></span> +</div><div class="i stanza"> +<span class="i4">O cruel Woman thus to Command<br /></span> +<span class="i4">A Task so hard, Yet what I can't withstand!<br /></span> +<span class="i4">Oh! thou rare Copy of the Original,<br /></span> +<span class="i4">By which free Man at first received his fall;<br /></span> +<span class="i4">For she not only wou’d her self undo,<br /></span> +<span class="i4">And all her Sex, but Damn all Mankind too. <span class='ralign n'>[Exit.</span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>The End of the First Act.</p> + +<hr /><p class='pagenum'><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[9]</a></p> +<h2><a name="ACT_II" id="ACT_II"></a>ACT the Second.</h2> + +<h3><span class='sc'>Scene</span> <span style='font-weight:normal;'>the First.</span><br /> +<i>The Fields.</i></h3> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Summerfield</span> solus.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> A Younger Brother! ’Tis a poor Title, and very hard to bear with: The +Elder Fool inherits all the Land, whilst we are forc’d to follow <i>Legacies +of Wit, and get ’um when we can</i>. Why shou’d the Law, by which we are deprived +of equal Portion with the First-begotten, not bind our Fathers to cease from Procreation, +and so as well deprive us of a wretched Being, as of the Thing we cannot +be without: No, no, our Mothers ne’re will consent to that, they love to groan and +squall, tho at the same time the Gallows eccho’s to their Groans, and both together +labour for us. From the first we travel forth—to’thers our Journey’s End. <i>All this +I know, yet I must forward</i>: To beg, my Birth will ne’re consent to; and <i>borrowing is +quite out of date</i>—Yet starve I cannot, <i>nor murder I wou’d not</i>: It must be the Highway +then, the old Trade we poor honest Rogues are forc’d too—This Place will +serve for a Beginner well enough—A Beginner did I say? Yes; for this is the very +first day I open Shop—Fortune, they say, uses to help the Bold, I hope she will be kind +to me. Ha! who have we here? A Gentlewoman well rigg’d, and only a Servant +with her, She may be a Prize worth the boarding, and faith I’ll venture hard but I’ll +carry her.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[He retires to a corner of the Stage.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Arabella</span> in great disorder, looking about her, with <span class='n'>Symon</span> her Servant.</p> + +<p><i>Arab.</i> This way, say’st thou <i>Symon</i>, with <i>Friendly</i>?</p> + +<p><i>Sym.</i> Yes forsooth Mistress, with Mr. <i>Friendly</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Arab.</i> Alas! I’m tired and cannot travel further; my Heart is full of Fear, and +yet I know not why, nor can I tell why he should use me thus,—It is not common +sure for Men to leave their Brides upon the Wedding-day: And yet I cannot tell +but it may be so! O wretched State of Marriage, and of Love, if this be Love! Here +will I lie me down, and rest a while [<i>Lies down.</i>] my wearied Limbs, unused +to these sad Frights and Fears—But prethee do thou run after him, and if it be +possible o’retake him too: Tell him the strange Disorder thou dost leave me in; and +let him know my Father’s Anger, his Friends Concern, and what is more, his <i>Arabella</i>’s +sad Complaint; tell him, I grieve, I faint, I die; tell him any thing that may +stay him.</p> + +<p><i>Sym.</i> Yes Forsooth.</p> +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[10]</a></span> +<i>Arab.</i> Intreat him to return; nay, urge him all thou canst to make him come again: +Nay haste, good <i>Symon</i>, fly if thou canst, for I can stir no further.</p> + +<p><i>Sym.</i> Well, well, Forsooth, I am gone.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Symon</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Arab.</i> Alas, how wretched and forlorn am I!</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">I she whom once so many did admire,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Whose Wit and Charms the coldest Hearts cou’d fire!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Now wretched Maid, and most unhappy Wife,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">In Sighs and in Complaints must end my Life.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Abandoned by my Husband, e’re enjoyed,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">With thoughts of Pleasure, yet untasted, cloy’d.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">He leaves me now to my sad Frights a Prey;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">O, my dear <span class='n'>Bonvile</span>! whither dost thou stray?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Unheard, alas! I make my amarous Moans;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">The Winds and Waves refuse to bear my Groans:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Eccho her self can’t suffer my Complaint,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But with repeated Sighs grows tir’d and faint.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Where to find him, good Heaven direct me!<br /></span> +<span class="i0">For losing him, I more than lose my self.<br /><span class='ralign'>[Rises, and <span class='n'>Exit</span>.</span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I must after her, she’s worth my Acquaintance, and has good Moveables about +her I perceive, what e’re the Ready is. The next Turning has a most convenient +Hollow for the Purpose, and there I’ll make her sure. Now Luck, or never.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exit after <span class='n'>Arabella</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>Reenter <span class='n'>Arabella</span>, and <span class='n'>Summerfield</span> after her.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> I’m at a stand already, and know not where I am.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I’ll direct you, Madam; Well overtaken.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Bless me, Sir; What are you?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> A Man.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> An honest Man, I hope?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Yes faith in some Respects, I’m very honest, but not altogether so; I were +not fit to live in the World if I were too honest, Child.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Alas! then I begin to fear: Pray tell me what you are?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Why, faith, an honest Thief.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> How, honest, and yet a Thief? I never heard they were of Kin before; +Pray, Heaven, I find it now.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Indeed! a very honest Thief.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Well, Sir, since that’s your Title, pray use me kindly: Nay, I’m sure you will, +there’s something in your Looks which speaks you mild and noble.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Yes, I am a Gentleman, and you shall find me so; for I’ll not offer you the +least shew of Violence, or offer to corrupt your Chastity; thô indeed you are tempting +Fair, and might inflame a colder Heart than mine: Yet Ravishing’s no part of my +Profession as yet; or if it were, you look so charming Innocent, you wou’d disarm +my wildest Thoughts.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Blessings on your Goodness!</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[11]</a></span> +<i>Sum.</i> Are you a Maid, or Wife?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> I am both, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Then this it seems is your Wedding-day, and these the Hours of Interim that +keep you in that double State?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Indeed you are in the right.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Come then, I’ll be brief, and hinder not your desired <i>Hymen</i>. You have some +superfluous Toys I see about you, which you must deliver; I mean, that Chain of +Gold and Pearl about your Neck, and those pretty Bracelets about your Arms, (pray, +Heaven, they prove not Emblems of the combined Hemp which is to halter mine); +come, Madam, pray deliver ’em.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Nay, I intreat you, Sir, to take ’em, for I cannot give ’em, they are lock’d +you see, and truly I have not the Key about me; it may be you are furnish’d with Instruments +that may unloose ’em, I pray do.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> No faith, Madam, I’m but a Beginner in this same Business, and am wholly +unprovided of any Pick-lock Tools besides this Sword.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Draws his Sword.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> O, good Sir, do not shew me that, ’tis too frightful; pray hurt me not, for +I do yield them freely: Use your Hands, perhaps their strength will serve to tear +’em from me without more ado. Some Pain I’ll quietly endure, provide you do not +hurt me much.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Alas, dear Lady, I’ll use you as gently as I can +upon my Word; but ’tis devilish strong.—If I hurt you, pray speak.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[He endeavours to break the Chain about her Neck.]</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Not much, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I am glad on’t,—S’death, I can’t do it.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[She draws his Sword, and stands upon her Guard.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> No Sir, nor shall not now: You a Highway-man and guard your self no better: +Come, Sir, what Money have you? Deliver quickly.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Not a Cross by this foolish Hand of mine!</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> How, no Money, ’twere pity then to take this from thee; +Here, take it again, I know you’l use me ne’re the worse for what +I have done.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Gives him his Sword again.]</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> No, by my Life!</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> I do believe you; and now pray hear me—Here on my Knees, in sight of +Heaven, I make this solemn Protestation, That if you’l but forbear the Rifling of this +Chain and Bracelets, and go but with me Home, by all the Vows which I this Day +have plighted to my dearest Husband, I will deliver you in Money the full Value of +these I wear, and cannot for my Life get off.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Ha! Ready-money is the Prize I look for; it passes without suspicion every +where, when Chains and Jewels are often stop’d and call’d for before the Magistrate: +But——</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Nay never doubt! You saw I gave you my Advantage up, and questioned not +my safety at your hands, pray fear not yours in mine.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I know not what to do.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Pray tell me, Sir, did you ever think a Woman true?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I have heard of some, but very few.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Will you add one more to your belief?</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</a></span> +<i>Sum.</i> I think I may, for they were fewer than the Articles of my Faith, therefore +I have room for you, and will believe you—Yet stay, you say you’l ransom your +jewels with Ready-money when you come Home; so you may, and then discover +me.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Shall I repeat the Vows I made?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> No, for I’ll trust you; and if you do betray me, then Mercy upon me, and +Farewel. I knew a Gentleman that had been a Courtier at <i>Whitehall</i> fifteen Years, +and he was buried e’re he took a Bride: ’Tis very strange you’l say; and may be my +Case in another way.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Come, Sir, never fear: A Man and afraid; Fie, fie!</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Give me your Hand, I’ll wait on you; and if you are (as I believe you) True +and Just, you are the World’s Wonder! Come, Madam.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exeunt.</span><br /></p> + +<h3>SCENE II.</h3> + +<p class='sd'>Enter two Boys, one with a Child in his Arms. <span class='n'>Compass</span> on the other side.</p> + +<p><i>1 Boy.</i> <i>Jack</i>, Who’s this?</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> O <i>Jeminy</i>! I’ll be hang’d if it ben’t Goodman <i>Compass</i>, that they said was +dead three Years ago.</p> + +<p><i>1 Boy.</i> Od’s Life, and so it is!</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> O <i>London</i>! sweet <i>London</i>! Do I live to see thee once again? My Eyes are +full of Brine for Joy. And if my dear <i>Peggy</i> be but living still, I shall cry ’em out.</p> + +<p><i>1 Boy.</i> Goodman <i>Compass</i>, I am glad to see you; You are welcome home.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Thank you, good Lad: Honest <i>Jack</i> here too? Why, thou art grown a +little Man since I saw thee last: What, is that thy own, heh?</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> I am fain to keep it, you see, whoever got it; it may be other Mens Cases +as well as mine.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Thou say’st true <i>Jack</i>: But whose pretty Knave is it?</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> My Dame’s where I live.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> And not thy Master’s?</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> Nay, nay, I can’t tell that neither: My Master loves it as well as if it were +his own, and for ought I see better than my Dame.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> A very good Lad by my Troth!</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> But, Goodman <i>Compass</i>, I can tell you News, Your Wife has a brave Boy too +of her own, not above a Quarter old, as big as two of this.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Ha! say’st thou so, <i>Jack</i>? Ha, ha, ha, by my Troth I am heartily glad to +hear it: I’ll give thee a dozen of Ale, and thy News be true, Boy.</p> + +<p><i>1 Boy.</i> I assure you ’tis very true: All your Neighbours can tell you the same.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Ha, ha, ha! But a Quarter old, and so lusty, say you? What plaguy thundering +Boys are got now-a-days: I Gad, I shall split my Sides with Laughing; Ha, +ha, ha.—But <i>Jack</i>, I have been loth to ask thee all this while, for fear of ill News, +how does my Wife?</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> O never better, nor ever so lusty and handsome—And truly she wears better +Clothes than she was wont, especially on Holy-days: she has Silk-Gowns, and Lac’d-Petticoats, +and fine <i>Holland</i>-Smocks too, they say, that have seen ’em: And some of +our Neighbours say, they were taken up in <i>Cheap</i>.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</a></span> +<i>Comp.</i> Like enough, <i>Jack</i>; and there they must be paid for—Well, good Lads, +go and tell my Wife the joyful Tidings of my Return.</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> That I will with all my Heart, for she heard you were dead long ago.</p> + +<p><i>1 Boy.</i> Nay, I’ll go along with you <i>Jack</i>.</p> + +<p><i>2 Boy.</i> Come then.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exeunt 2 Boys.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Well, <i>Peggy</i>, if I am one of the Livery, I thank thee for it: The Cuckolds +are the greatest Company in all the City: And we have more Aldermen among us, +than all the other put them together.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Peg, Compass</span>’s Wife.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> O my dear sweet Honey-suckle! Art thou alive? I am glad to see +thee with all my Heart and Soul, so I am.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Runs and kisses him.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> O, ho! good Spouse, give me leave to shed a few pearly Tears; the Fountain +of Love will have its Course: And thô I cannot Sing at first sight, yet I can Cry +you see. I am as it were new come into the World; and Children Cry before they +Laugh, a long time you know.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Yes; and so thou art new born indeed to me, my <i>Numpy</i>; for I was told you +were dead long since, and never thought to see this dear sweet Face of thine again: +I heard thou wert div’d to the bottom of the Sea, and that you never did intend to see +poor <i>Peggy</i> more.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> He, he, he, I was going down, as you say <i>Peg</i>, but I thought better on’t, and +turn’d back: I heard an ill Report of my Neighbours there; the devouring Sharks, +and other Sea-Monsters, whose Company, to tell you the Truth, I did not like; +and therefore resolv’d to come home and bide with thee my Girl—Come kiss thy +poor Hubby, kiss me I say, for Sorrow begins to ebb apace.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> A thousand, thousand Welcomes home dear <i>Numpy</i>!</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> An Ocean of Thanks, kind <i>Peggy</i>: Well, and how goes all at Home? What +Lank still, poor <i>Peg</i>? Wil’t ne’re be full Sea at our Wharf?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Alas, Husband, what do you mean?</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> A Lass, is it, or a Lad, Wench? I shou’d be glad of both; I look’d for a +pair of Compasses long afore now.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> What, and you from home, Love?</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> I from home? Why thô I was from home, and other of our Neighbours +from home, does that follow that every body else is from home?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> I am pleased you are so merry, Husband.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Merry, nay I’ll be merrier yet; why shou’d I be sorry? I hope my Boy’s +well, is he not? Od’s fish, I look for another by this Time.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Boy, what Boy, Deary?</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> What Boy! why the Boy I got when I came home in the Cock-boat one +Night, about a Year ago; You have not forgotten it, I hope, I think I left behind +me for a Boy, and a Boy I look for.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> I find he knows all—What shall I do? <span class='i ralign'>[Aside.]</span><br /> +O dear Husband, pray pardon me. <span class='i ralign'>[Kneels.]</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Pardon thee; why I hope thou hast not made away with my Boy, hast +thou? Od’s death I’ll hang thee, if there were never a Whore more in <i>London</i>, if thou +hast.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</a></span> +<i>Peg.</i> O no; but your long Absence, and the Rumour of your Death, [<i>Cries.</i>] +made me think I might venture.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Venture, quoth a, I can’t blame thee, <i>Peg</i>; for <i>Wapping</i>, if it were twice +<i>Wapping</i>, can’t hold out always, no more than <i>Redriff</i>, <i>Limehouse</i> or <i>Shadwel</i>, nay or +the strongest Suburbs about <i>London</i>; and when it comes to that, wo be to the City +too, Girl.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Consider, Husband, I’m but a Woman, neither the first or last that have done +the same, and truly I won’t deny but I have a Child.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Have you so? And what by Consequence must I have then, I pray?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> If you’l forgive me this Time, it shall be so no more, indeed and indeed, now.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Well, well. I will forgive thee, <i>Peg</i>, upon this Condition, that you tell me +who it was that fell foul aboard thee, and sprung this Leak in thee.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> O dear Husband!</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Nay, no Excuses, for I must know.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Why then truly it was Mr. <i>Venter</i> the Merchant.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> I am beholding to him, and wou’d requite his Civility, if his Wife were but +as willing, thô he be one of our Merchants at Sea, he shall give me leave to be Owner +at home; and where is my Boy? what, shan’t I see him?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Yes if you please, good Husband: He’s nurs’d at <i>Bednal green</i>; ’tis now too +late, to Morrow will be better.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Come then we’l home and to bed.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Let other Fools repine at Scoffs and Scorns,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll teach the Cuckold how to hide his Horns.<br /><span class='ralign n'>[Exeunt.</span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Justice <span class='n'>Merryman</span>, Mr. <span class='n'>Venter, Spruce,</span> Mrs. <span class='n'>Venter</span> and <span class='n'>Clara</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Was the like ever known, that a Bridegroom shou’d absent himself on his +Wedding-Day?</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> ’Tis somewhat strange indeed.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> And the Bride too my Daughter, she’s out of the way: Why what shou’d +be the meaning of all this, Od’s bobs I can’t tell?</p> + +<p>Mrs. <i>Ven.</i> Perhaps they’r busy Brother, privately conferring Notes together: You +can’t tell but that the young Man may have a stomach to his Supper, and fall too +unawares, and we ne’re the wiser.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Od’s nigs, very true; what wou’d you say then Sir, if they shou’d be stol’n away, +and a-bed together seriously?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> What wou’d I say? marry I wou’d say, Speed ’em well: And if no worse +News ever comes to me, I’ll be hang’d if e’re I cry’d for’t.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Nurse.</p> + +<p>How now, what’s the Business with you?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Business enough, Forsooth; for I have the strangest Tydings!</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Of any One that’s lost, Woman?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> No forsooth, of One that’s found again, an’t please you.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> O, he was lost then it seems.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[15]</a></span> +Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Her Business is with me, I believe Brother; is it not, Woman?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Yes, Sir.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Come hither then, <span class='i ralign'>[Nurse whispers Mr. <span class='n'>Venter</span>.]</span><br /> +How, return’d?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Yes indeed, Sir, and all discovered.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Ah Curse on the Wind that blew him ashore.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Aye, so say I Sir, and did not sink him when he was going.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Well, well, be sure you do not let him come near the Child.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> I warrant you, Sir, if you charge me to the contrary.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Yes, I do strictly charge you as you tender my Displeasure.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Well then let me alone—Besides, Sir, he intends to come to morrow +morning with his Wife and see him.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> I’ll meet him there; and if he chance to be there before me, be sure to +keep the Child safe, and not let him touch it.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> I warrant you, let me alone. <span class='i ralign'>[Exit Nurse.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Summerfield</span> and <span class='n'>Arabella</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> So, so, Heaven be praised, they are not both lost I see, here’s the Bride, my +Daughter, come again.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Father, and Gentlemen, I desire ye to treat this Stranger here with all Respect +and Generosity; He’s a loving Kinsman of my <i>Bonvile</i>’s who kindly came to +congratulate our Wedding.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Sir, you are heartily welcome. Od’s bobs you are.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Welcome to all of us.</p> + +<p><i>Spruce.</i> Seriously, Sir, and so you are.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> But where’s the Bridegroom, Girl? Od’s bobs we’re all at a Nonplus here, +at a stand, quite out; the Musicks ceas’d, and we all look as thô there were neither a +light Heart or Heel among us; nay, my Cousin <i>Clara</i> too as cloudy as on a washing Day.</p> + +<p><i>Clara.</i> ’Tis then because you will not dance with me, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> ’Tis I alone have cause to be sad, if this Day’s Happiness cou’d admit of any; +But I’ve long reason’d with my pressing Thoughts, and from them drawn some +Symptoms of Relief. Suppose this Day hath long since appointed by my dear +<i>Bonvile</i>, to meet some Foe, and right his injur’d Reputation: Nay, say he fights, alas! +Why shou’d I fear, when all the Powers above, that guard true Love and Innocence, +will never see him fall.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Prethee peace, good Girl hold thy tongue; Od’s bobs thou’lt make us all +Cowards, to hear a Woman preach up Valour thus.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Well, Sir, I have done: But pray entertain this Gentleman kindly for my +sake. Indeed I was afraid when I saw him first.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Ha! what does she say? Od’s Death she’l tell!</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Being in search of my dear <i>Bonvile</i>, I had quite lost my Way when he most +opportunely came unto my Aid, and gave me many marks of his Esteem in my distress +of Fears; nay more than this, which I’ll declare at large.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Death and Hell, she’l betray me.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[16]</a></span> +<i>Ara.</i> Well, Gentlemen, since the Bridegroom’s absent, I must supply his Place: +Come, when I have waited on you to your Pleasure, I will return [<i>To</i> Summerfield.] +to you, Sir, we must discourse more of my <i>Bonvile</i> yet.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exeunt all but <span class='n'>Summerfield</span>.]</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>Manet <span class='n'>Summerfield</span> solus.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> What a trembling Trade’s this, when Conscience, that shou’d be our only +Guide, flies and leaves us to our accusing Guilt. A Thief! the very Name and +Thought chills my Blood, and makes me tremble like an Ague-fit. A Dog, nay every +Bough that moves, puts us in fear of present Apprehension. Sure I shall never thrive +on this Trade: Perhaps I need take no further Care, I may be now near to my +Journey’s End, or at least in a fair way to <i>Newgate</i>, and from thence to <i>Tyburn</i>, the +only Place that we poor Rogues can claim for an Inheritance. Trust a Woman, and +with a Matter of such Importance, what a simple Dog am I? I cou’d find in my Heart +to run away: And that were base to run from a woman; I can lay claim to nothing +but her Vows, and those the Women seldom or never mind.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Arabella</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> So, Sir, now you shall find a Woman as good as her Promise; Here are 20 +Pieces, the full Value, on my Life, of what they cost.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Pray, Madam, do not thus suspend my doubtful Soul; but if you do design +to insnare my Life, speak, speak freely: Or if the Constable be at the Door, let him +shew his Staff of Authority, perhaps I may corrupt him with a Bribe.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> How! base ungrateful Man, do you suspect my Faith? Nay then, Father, +Uncle, and Gentlemen, where are you?</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter all as before.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> How now, how now! What’s the matter, Girl?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> For shame, will you not entertain your Kinsman here a little better: you +leave him here alone, as thô you despised his Company.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Is that all? I thought the Bridegroom had been return’d: Sir, pray pardon +this Rudeness; But indeed I had quite forgot you, quite forgot you, as I hope to be +sav’d: But what makes you tremble, Sir, are you ill dispos’d.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Think you he hath not reason to be ill-disposed at this cold <span class='i ralign'>[Aside to Justice <span class='n'>Merryman</span>.]</span><br /> +Entertainment? for my part I blush for shame.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Come pray, Sir, shake off this Dulness, and participate of our +Mirth, Od’s nigs do.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I am very well, Sir, I thank you, only the Gentleman is a little under a Mistake.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> It may be so, Ay, ay, it may be so; I vow I thought you had trembled, but I +believe it might be my own Hand; you must pardon me, I was stiffer once.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Sir, your humble Servant.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> But, Gentlemen, what think you of an Adventure?</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Adventure whither?</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[17]</a></span> +<i>Mer.</i> Why, to the <i>East-Indies</i>? I have a Vessel, Gentlemen, called the <i>Sea-Horse</i>, +bound thither, and to morrow I do expect her to sail. Now, Gentlemen, if you’l +venture, ye shall have fair Dealing, that I’ll promise you. And for the French, you +need not fear them, for she is a smart new Vessel: Nay, she hath a Letter of Mart +too, and twenty brave roaring Boys on both Sides her, Starboard and Larboard: +And I intend to go as far as <i>Marget</i> down with her, ’twill be as good as Physick +to me.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> A very good Motion, Sir, I begin, there’s my ten Pieces.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> And, Sir, if a proffer’d Love may be accepted, be pleased to take my ten +Pieces with you.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Your’s above all the rest, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> That’s kindly said, Sir, and I thank you: Now pray venture Ten more for +my sake.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Alas, Madam, it’s a younger Brother’s Portion.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> At my Request, Sir, venture the other Ten; if you want, I’ll supply you with +as many more.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> With all my Heart then: Come, Sir, if you please, I’ll double mine: So now +she’s got her Gold again, and I am now no Thief, (<i>aside</i>) Sir, I have a Suit to you,<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[To <span class='n'>Merryman</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> You may command it, for I am always at your Service: But pray your +Pleasure?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> My Request, Sir, is, to have the Honour of keeping you Company to Sea, for +I have a great desire to see <i>Marget</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Sir, I shall be very happy in your good Company.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> I hope you will be both better acquainted e’re you return; and by that time +your Kinsman may be here to make you more welcome.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">And for the Gold at my Request you lent,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll double it to give you more content.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Sum.</span> Why shou’d I fear, since she is prov’d so just?<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll quit my Trade: Now <span class='n'>Jack Catch</span> do thy worst.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><span class='i ralign'>Exeunt.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>The End of the Second ACT.</p> + +<hr /><p class='pagenum'><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[18]</a></p> +<h2><a name="ACT_III" id="ACT_III"></a>ACT the Third.<br /> +<i>A Wood</i></h2> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Bonvile</span> and <span class='n'>Friendly</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Come my brave <i>Friendly</i>, I think we are here the first: Your Enemy is not +yet i’th Field; let’s walk a Turn or two, perhaps by that time he may arrive.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I’m very confident that he’s here already.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Thy Looks, me-thinks, speak Conquest sure thy own; an ardent Rage has +kindled both thy Cheeks.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Like a red Morning, Friend; which still foretels a stormy Day to follow—And +now I well observe your Face, me-thinks it waxes pale, there’s Death in it already.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> How, <i>Friendly</i>, do you then take me for a Coward? My Face look pale, and +Death in it already? By Heav’n, shou’d any but my <i>Friendly</i> dare to tell me what +thou hast said, my Sword shou’d ram the base Affront down the curst Villain’s Throat. +But you are my Friend, and I must only chide your Error. But prethee tell me who +is it you are to fight with, for as yet I am ignorant both of the Cause and Person.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Ha, his Name! Did you enquire his Name?</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Yes.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I dare not yet reveal it for fear of——</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> For fear of what?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O Confusion! I know not what to say!</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> How, afraid to tell his Name? Then I begin to doubt the Justice of your +Quarrel.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Too well you may, for by yon’ setting Sun, that Globe of heavenly Light +I swear, I come to kill the only Man that strives to save my Life—Man did I say? +Nay more than common Man, for those the World abound with; but such a Man besides, +all this vast Land affords not.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> By this your large Encomium of your Friend, I’m afraid ’twas Wine first +made your Quarrel, and thereupon this Challenge did ensue.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O no! I call the Powers above to witness, that in all the Course of our unhappy +Friendship, I to my knowledg never did receive the least Affront or Injury +from him.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> How came this Challenge then?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O dear Friend, the noblest that Man cou’d ever boast of: [<i>embraces him</i>] +When first my rigid Fate threw on me this Command to fight, I had recourse to many +whom I always thought my Friends; but when the Touchstone of my Danger +try’d ’em, I found ’em like the cursed Fruit of <i>Sodom</i>, fair without, but rotten at +<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[19]</a></span> +the Heart: But then I found out <i>Bonvile</i>, my only dearest Friend. <i>Bonvile</i> no sooner +heard of my Engagement, but flew unto my Succour with as much Bravery, as a great +General hastned by Alarms, marches to meet the Foe: You left your Nuptial Bed +perhaps to meet your Death. O unheard-of Friendship! My Father gave me Life, +’tis true; but you, my Friend, support my Honour. All this for me, while I, ungrateful +Man, thus seek your Life: For to my eternal Horror be it spoke, you are +the Man whom I come here to kill.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Ha!</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Too true alas! there read the Warrant for your Death.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Gives him the Letter.]</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> ’Tis a Woman’s Hand.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Yes, and a bad One too, they all speak fair, write foul, but mean worse.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> How! kill me? Sure, I dream, and this is all Delusion, or else thou dost it +only to try thy Friend.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O, from my Soul, I wish it were no more. But read, read on, see how I’m fetter’d +in a <i>Circe’s</i> Charms—I love beyond Imagination, love even to Madness, and +must as madly do a Deed will damn me to the hottest Flames of Hell.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> And woo’t thou kill thy Friend for such a Woman?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Alas! I must, you see I am commanded, commanded too by Love; Love +more powerful than all the Sacred Ties of Friendship, therefore draw, and guard thy +self.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Draws.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Not I by Heaven! What wou’dst thou have me draw and kill my Friend?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> There thou stab’st my Soul. O where, where is now my Resolution fled? A +fatal Blast has struck me; a sudden Horror shot me thrô the Heart; a Trembling +seiz’d my Knees, that I can hardly stand, and all my Vital Powers methinks seem +dead; yet Love’s the Fire must kindle all again, therefore I charge thee draw, or +naked as thou art, I will assail thee.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> I am defended against all that thou canst do, in having Justice on my Side, and +Friendship too to back it.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">But since Humanity now bears so sway,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">To this unguarded Breast come make your way.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p>Strike home be sure. <span class='i ralign'>[Opens his Bosom.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> That were a barbarous Murder.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> How can the Effect prove different from the Cause? Or how can any thing +but damn’d Barbarity ensue a Woman’s much more damn’d Design? Who wou’d expect +Reason from one that raves, or hope for Mercy in a Tyger’s Den? Believe me, +<i>Friendly</i>, all this may sooner be; Mercy may sooner dwell among the <ins class='corr' title="Transcriber’s Note: The original showed ‘Salvage’.">Savage</ins> Wolves +and Bears, than in a Woman’s Breast.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O, my too rigid Fate, to place me thus on such a dangerous Precipice, that +wheresoe’re I turn my self for help, I see my Ruin still before mine Eyes.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Seems to weep.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> [<i>Pausing.</i>] Stay—The Command which thy <i>Medea</i> sent thee, +was to kill thy only dearest Friend, was it not?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Alas! it was.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Then here, all Friendship dies between us; thus hast thou kill’d thy Friend, +and satisfied that infernal Hag, thy cursed Mistress, who thus commanded thee: +Away, I say, begon, and never see me more.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Ha!</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[20]</a></span> +<i>Bon.</i> Yes, base ungrateful Wretch, farewel, (<i>Offers to go</i>) —Yet stay, and +since that Sacred Tie of Friendship’s broke, know thou, most vile of Men, that <i>Bonvile</i>’s +now thy Enemy; therefore do thou draw and guard thy spotted Life.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> How, Friend!</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Friend didst thou call me? On forfeit of thy Life that word no more; the +very Name of Friend from thee, shall be a Quarrel: How can I tell but that thou +lovest my Wife, and therefore feign’d this damn’d Design to draw me from her Arms?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> How! wrong thy Wife? O no, I never had a Thought so vile! Yet you must +forgive me, indeed you must, by all that once was dear to me; and what I dare not mention +more, by Love and Honour, I implore thy Pardon—Still art thou deaf to my +Complaints?—Nay, then upon my Knee, I will enforce thy Pity. Behold me, <i>Bonvile</i>, +prostrate at thy Feet, crawling for Mercy, swimming in Tears, and almost +drown’d with Shame; extend thy Arm to help me, as thou’rt a Man, be God-like in +thy Nature, and raise me from the Grave; turn thy Eyes on me, and sink me not with +Frowns; O save me, save me, or I fall for ever.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> As soon shall Heav’n reverse the Fate of Hell, as I recal what I have said, or +plant thee in my Breast again.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Nay, then I am lost to thee, and all the World besides.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Rises.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Thou are indeed for ever lost to me; see what a miserable Wretch thy Folly +now has made thee: A Creature so far below my Pity, that I despise and scorn thy +base Submission, and will never hear thee more, more.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Say but thou hast forgiven me, and I will ask no more.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> I never will.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O cruel <i>Bonvile</i>!</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> More barbarous <i>Friendly</i>: Hold off, or I will use thee like a Dog, tread thee +to Earth, and spurn thee like a Slave, base as thou art.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Still thou art my Friend——</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Thou ly’st, I have abjured the Name.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Let me but go with thee.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Not for the World; I’de rather venture my self with Crocodiles, catch the +last dying Gasps of some poor Wretch infested with the Plague, than trust my self +with thee.</p> + +<div class=" poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Farewel, I leave thee with the greatest Curse,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Condemn’d to Woman, Hell affords no worse.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><span class='i ralign'>[Exit, breaking from him.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'><span class='n'>Friendly solus</span>, rising in a Passion.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Death and Destruction, am I thus despised! Condemned to Woman’s Lust, +and scorn’d by Man. By <i>Bonvile</i> too, after imploring, like a School-Boy, at his Feet—My +Blood boils high, and scalds my very Heart! My inward Grief calls on +me for Revenge, and I am all on fire! O that I had the proud <i>Bonvile</i> here now at my +Feet, I’de use him worse than he did me before.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">But since that open Force yields no Relief,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Private Revenge shall ease my swelling Grief.<br /></span> +<span class="i0"><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[21]</a></span>With Thoughts of Jealousy I’ll fill his Soul,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Which shall its Powers of all their Rest controul.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Thus for a Woman I’ve begun a War,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And for her sake must damn my Soul like her.<br /><span class='ralign n'>[Exit.</span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<h3>SCENE the Second.</h3> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Nurse, Compass,</span> and his Wife.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Indeed you must pardon me, I can’t let ye see the Child; to tell you the +Truth, I am commanded to the contrary.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Commanded! Prethee who commanded thee?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> The Father.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> The Father, Why who am I?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Not the Father sure, the Civil Law has found it otherwise.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> The Civil Law found it otherwise! Why then the Uncivil Law shall make it +mine again, I’ll be as dreadful as a <i>Shrove-Tuesday</i> to thee; for I’ll besiege thy squalling +catterwauling Castle, with my Friends the Mob, and gut thy stinking Nursery, +but I’ll both see and have my Child.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Harkee, Goodman Swabber, say but half so much again, and I’ll call the +Constable, and lay Burglary to your Charge. You wou’d not be so hot if the Enemy +were in View, nor if you had to do with any body but a poor innocent Woman, +so you wou’d’nt.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Good Husband be patient, and let me alone with her: Come, come, good +Nurse, let him see the Boy.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Indeed I dare not Goody <i>Compass</i>: The Father first you know delivered me +the Child, and order’d me to let no body see it. He pays me well and weekly for +my Pains, and therefore I’ll do as be bad me, so I will.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Why thou white Bastard-breeder; Is not this Woman here the Mother?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Yes, I grant you that.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Do you so? Well, and I grant it too; And is not the Child then my own by +the Wives Copy-hold?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> The Law must try that.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> The Law! What then you think I’ll be but its Father-in-Law? I tell thee, +all the Wit and Law twixt <i>Cuckolds-Point</i> and <i>Westminster-Hall</i>, shan’t keep my own +dear Flesh and Blood from me, I warrant you that. No an’t does, I’ll be hanged at +the Main-yard: Why, who, dost think, uses to get my Children but my self?</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> Nay, I can’t tell; you must look to that, for my part I ne’re knew you get +any.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Say’st thou so? Why, look you, do but put on a clean Smock, and try me, +if thou darst, I’ll hold thee three to one I get thee with Child before I leave thee: +Heh! what say’st thou?<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Offers to lay hold on her.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> I’ll see you hang’d first—Nay, pray be quiet, and don’t offer to spoil my +Milk. Lord, you are as boisterous as my Husband was the first Night we were married: +Pray, Goody <i>Compass</i>, take off your Cur, or else he’l bite me.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> No never fear him, Nurse, he’s not so furious I assure ye.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Mr. <span class='n'>Venter</span> and his Wife.<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[22]</a></span></p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> O! here’s my Master, the Child’s Father, now talk with him.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Good morrow Neighbour, good morrow to ye both.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Both! Good morrow to you and your Wife too, if you go to that.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> I wou’d speak calmly with you, Friend, if you think fit.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> I know what belongs to Calm, and a Storm too; and if you please, a cold +word or two wi’ you.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> With all my Heart.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> I understand that you have ty’d your Mare in my Ground.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> My Mare, Friend, nay I assure you, ’twas only my Nag.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Your Nag? Well your Nag then let it be: Harke, Sir, to be short, I’ll cut +off your Nag’s Tail, if e’re I catch him there again.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Pray hear me, you are too rough to maintain——</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> I say, Sir, you shall maintain no Child of mine; my Wife does not bestow +her Labour for that purpose.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> You are too passionate—I will not maintain——</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> No marry shall you not.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> The Deed I have done to be lawful, I have repented it, and given Satisfaction +to the Law, my Purse has paid for’t; therefore I wou’d treat milder with you +if you’d be pleased.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Yes, yes, I am very well pleased, and shall be better pleased if you can serve +me so still: For, look you Sir, one of these Days I shall to Sea again, you know where +my Wife lives; yet you’l but lose your labour, for get as many Children as you can, I +assure you, you shall keep none of them.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> I think you are mad.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Why, if I am Horn-mad, what’s that to you?</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Nay then, since you are so rough, I tell you plainly you are—a——</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> A what? What am I, heh?</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> A Coxcomb.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> A Coxcomb! a Cuckold you mean, and you a Fool for your pains.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> The Child is mine, I am the Father of it, and will keep it.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Yes if you can, I know you will. But pray tell me, is not my Wife the +Mother? You may be as far from being the Father as I am, for my Wife’s acquainted +with more Whore-masters besides your self; ay, and as crafty Merchants too, let +me tell you that.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> No indeed Husband, I had to do with no body else, ’twas he begot, indeed +and indeed now. Yet for all that, the Child’s mine, I bred it and bore it, and I’ll +have it and keep it, so I will.</p> + +<p>Mrs. <i>Ven.</i> Pray hold there Mrs. Jill-flurt, the Child’s my Husband’s, and he shall +have it, or I’ll tear your Eyes out, ye Whore you.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Good Words, Mistress; d’ye hear, give good Words you’d best, or I shall +tell you your own.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> I’ll have no more to say to ye, the Law shall determine it; in the mean +time Nurse keep the Child for me, there, there’s Money for thee.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Gives her Money.</span><br /></p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[23]</a></span> +<i>Comp.</i> There’s Money for me too, keep it for me, Nurse; give him both thy Duggs +at once, I pay thee for the right one, Girl.</p> + +<p><i>Nurse.</i> I have two Hands, you see Gentlemen; this does but show ye how the Law +will hamper ye; even thus you’l be used, Gentlemen, if you go to Law.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> It can’t be helpt, for I won’t lose my Right.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Nor I mine for all you’re a Merchant.</p> + +<p>Mrs. <i>Ven.</i> Nor I mine for all I did not bear it.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Nor I, tho but a poor Sailer’s Wife.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Well, fare ye well, we shall meet in another Place—Come <i>Winny</i>.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Venter</span> and his Wife.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Ay, ay, I’ll meet you when and where you dare, and do your worst, I fear +you not: By the Lord <i>Harry</i> the World’s come to a fine Pass, that we must go to +Law for our Children. No wonder the Lawyers are all so rich, yet e’re the Law +shall have a Limb, a Leg, a Joint or Nail of this same Boy,</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">’T shall cost me more than a whole Child in getting,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Some win by play, and standers by with Betting.<br /><span class='ralign n'>[Exeunt.</span></span> +</div></div> + +<h3>SCENE the Third.</h3> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Spruce, Arabella</span> with a Letter in her Hand, <span class='n'>Clara</span>, +Mr. <span class='n'>Venter</span>, and Mrs. <span class='n'>Venter</span>.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> From whence came that Letter, Niece?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> From <i>Putney</i>, Sir, and from my Husband.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> And pray be free; Does he tell ye the Cause of his leaving you so abruptly +on his Wedding-day?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Yes; Sir, yet this had been sufficient to have let me known what he is gone +about, without the formal Addition of an Epistle.</p> + +<p><i>Spruce.</i> That, why what is that I pray Madam?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> His Will, Sir, wherein he makes me his sole Executrix.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Will! why what the Devil does he mean, seriously I can’t find it out?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Why, Sir, he’s gone to fight.</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> How fight, Madam! On my Soul then I believe <i>Friendly</i>’s Second.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> You’re in the right, he is so, and I am lost for ever!</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> O foolish <i>Friendly</i>, this thy Mistake has made me the most wretched of Woman-kind! +Such variety of Thoughts load my afflicted Breast, that I know not what +to think: I rave, am mad, not knowing what my Folly may produce; I fear for +both, for both my Heart does bleed.</p> + +<p><i>Ara</i>. Miserable Maid! nay, miserable Wife! but much more miserable Widow! +O my dear <i>Bonvile</i>!</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Duce take me, if e’re I saw a Company so Phlegmatick in all my Life: Mr. +<i>Venter</i>, prethee let’s have a Song, to pass away the Time, and put Life into the +Bride.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[24]</a></span> +Mr. <i>Ven.</i> With all my Heart, Mr. <i>Spruce</i>: Here, who waits?—Call +in the Musick, and desire ’em to oblige the Ladies with a new Song.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Servant Enter and Exit.]</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Your self, Sir, you mean?</p> + +<p><i>Spr.</i> Nay all of us I protest.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Ay, ay, all of us.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Musick and others who sing.</p> + +<p class='noin c mt2'>A Dialogue set by <i>Seignior Baptist</i>.</p> + +<div class='center'> +<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary=""> +<tr><td align='left'>Man. <i>A Woman’s Love</i></td><td align='left'>Woman. <i>And Man’s is such,</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Man. <i>Still too little,</i></td><td align='left'>Wom. <i>Or else too much.</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>Men are Extreams,</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>And Women too,</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>All, all are false,</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>All, All like you.</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>You’ll swear and lie,</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>If you’l believe,</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>And sigh and die,</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>Yet still deceive.</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>Your Vows and Oaths</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>Your Smiles and Tears,</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>Are all but Baits,</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>Are all but Snares.</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>To win a Heart,</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>And then destroy,</i></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Wom. <i>The easy Fool,</i></td><td align='left'>Man. <i>The promis’d Joy.</i></td></tr> +</table></div> + +<p class='noin c mt2'>Another Strain.</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Wom. <i>I’le have you offer no more your Pretending,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0">Man. <i>Nor will I suffer your modish Dissembling:</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0">Wom. <i>For Honour commands,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0">Man. <i>And Freedom withstands,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4">Wom. <i>What you?</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4">Man. <i>And you.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0">Wom. <i>I know wou’d have me be, your Slave,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0">Man. <i>I know wou’d have me be, your Slave.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4">Wom. <i>O, no, no, no!</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4">Man. <i>No, no, no, no!</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4">Wom. <i>I never will agree,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4">Man. <i>I ever will be free.</i><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>After the Song enter Justice <span class='n'>Merryman, Summerfield,</span> and three or four Sailers.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Daughter, Daughter! Where’s my Daughter? I say, Where’s my Daughter? +O Girl, I have the best News to tell you——</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> What of my Husband, Sir?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> No, no, of your Cousin, Girl, of your Cousin.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[25]</a></span><i>Ara.</i> What of him, Sir?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Such a Cousin, Girl, such a dear Cousin he is, as <i>Alexander the Great</i>, if he +were alive, might be proud and boast of.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> You’re welcome here again, Sir; You’ve made but a short Voyage, pray +what occasion’d your Return so speedily?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Madam, I render you ten thousand Thanks; Your Generosity and Goodness +has wholly made me yours; I am the humblest of your faithful Admirers.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Forbear such lavish Gratitude; You’r too profuse in your Acknowledgment +of your small Favours. But pray be brief, and let me know the happy Occasion of +this your sudden Return, I long methinks to hear it.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Madam, you may command me—Not to molest the Company with the +Recital of every vain and needless Circumstance; ’twas briefly thus. Scarce had we +passed by <i>Marget</i> on our Course, when on a sudden, from the Top-mast head, a Sailer +cries, All hands Aloft, three Sails ahead: With that we rumidg and clear our +Deck, our Gun-room arm’d, and all things now are ready for a Fight. The Ships +before descried, with warlike Stems cut the resisting Waves, whilst from their Pendants +fluttering in the Air, we found they were three <i>Dunkirk</i> Privateers; they +having made our English Cross advanced, salute us with a Broad-side, to make us +strike and yield: But we, who ne’re knew as yet what ’twas so cowardly to yield, +and not regarding their unequal Odds, fell boldly on, returning Fire for Fire. The +Engagement then grew desperate, for they on either Side fired in amain, whilst we +withstood their Force. At length they boldly grappled, and laid us close aboard, +and we as bravely beat them off again.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> But now, Daughter, mark what follows, for that’s worth all, I’faith it is; +therefore go on, dear Cuz, go on.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Sea-room at length we got; when (as Fate wou’d have it) an unlucky +Shot struck both the Captain and Lieutenant dead. Then we began to fear, and all +our noble Hearts were trembling with despair.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> No, no, not all Daughter—But you shall hear more—Ods bobs you +shall.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> How cou’d it be otherwise, when both our Commanders now were lost? +therefore to strike was all the Talk——</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ay, ay, now Daughter, now comes the Play, the other was only the Prologue.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> But Fortune favouring, and the Wind springing a fresh Gale, we got clear +off and try’d to make a running Fight.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ay, but Cuz, how did we do all this? by whose Order and Direction?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Pardon me, Sir, ’twas of so small Moment, that already it has slipt my treacherous +Memory.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Oh, ho! has it so! Ha, ha, ha! But it has not mine, I thank you, no marry +has it not, as you shall hear—Then he, with an undaunted Spirit, started up +amongst the Sailers, and——</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Nay pray Sir——</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> By the Foot of <i>Pharaoh</i> I’ll not be balkt; he, I say, with an Heroick Voice +cried out, Courage brave boys, Charge and Discharge amain; come I’ll supply your +fall’n Captain’s place. At this blest News they all fell on again, with ten thousand +times more Fury than before: Victory, Victory, was all their cry, whilst he my +<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[26]</a></span> +Cousin here, whom I shall ne’re forget, for by the Lord, methinks, I see him in the +Fight this very Instant, now running this way, now running that way, now down to +the Gun-room to encourage those that fought there; now upon the Deck again, +still crying out, Fear not, brave Boys, the Day will soon be our’s.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> O pray, Sir, let me intreat you to forbear, you make me ashamed, I protest, +to hear you.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ashamed, say you? Ha, ha, ha!</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Good Sir, go on.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> I will, I will—At length the proud French swallowing too many of our English +Balls, two of ’em very fairly cried, Your Servants Gentlemen, farewel, and down +they went. The other having lost most of her Men, resolved to leave us; but we +being too nimble, overtook her, clapt some Men aboard, and brought her in a Prize: +And this my brave Man of War here, was the first that boarded her with Sword in +Hand.</p> + +<p><i>1 Sailer.</i> Of all this I was an Eye-witness.</p> + +<p><i>2 Sailer.</i> And so was I.</p> + +<p><i>3 Sailer.</i> And I, and all of us.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Yes, and many more stout Boys besides.</p> + +<p><i>Spruce.</i> Sir, we are all indebted to your Valour; such Voyages as these, from +small Venturers, in time may make us great Merchants.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Well, never was Fight better managed before, that’s certain.</p> + +<p><i>1 Sail.</i> No, never, never!</p> + +<p><i>2 Sail.</i> Better, say you? No nor half so well.</p> + +<p><i>3 Sail.</i> If it were in our Power, we’d make him Admiral, so we wou’d.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Gentlemen, ’tis to your Valours all, that I am indebted for the Honour I +have gain’d: And that I may not seem wholly ungrateful, there, there’s something +in token of my Thankfulness.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Gives ’em Money.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>1, 2, 3 Sailers.</i> Heaven bless your Worship.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Come Cousin, we’l withdraw into the Parlour: And if these honest Friends +will be pleased to drink what our House affords, they shall be welcome.</p> + +<p><i>1 Sail.</i> Thank you Mistress with all our Hearts.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[<span class='n'>Exeunt</span> all but Sailers.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>2 Sail.</i> Well, this Mr. <i>Summerfield</i> is a brave Fellow, Gadzooks he is.</p> + +<p><i>3 Sail.</i> Ay <i>Tom</i> so he is; had it not been for him, we had all been taken on my +Conscience.</p> + +<p><i>1 Sail.</i> On my Soul and so we had: O if you had but seen him when he boarded +the <i>Monsieur</i>, ’twou’d have made you laugh ’till you had split your Sides. He came +up to the Captain o’this fashion with a Slap—ha! and gave him such a back-handed +wipe, that he cut off his Head as genteely, as tho he had served seven Years Apprenticeship +to’t.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Servant with a Bowl of Punch.</p> + +<p><i>Serv.</i> Gentlemen, Mr. <i>Summerfield</i> desires ye to be merry, and has sent you this to +drink his Health.</p> + +<p><i>1 Sail.</i> O, the Lord bless him, he’s a fine Gentleman, and so pray tell him, and +withal give him our hearty Thanks; Dost hear Boy?</p> + +<p><i>Serv.</i> Yes, yes, I will.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit.</span><br /></p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[27]</a></span><i>2 Sail.</i> What is’t Brother?</p> + +<p><i>3 Sail.</i> Punch by this Light!</p> + +<p>Omnes. <i>Hoo-ra; Hoo-ra; Viva</i> Mr. <i>Summerfield, Viva, Hoora.</i></p> + +<p class='sd'><span class='n'>[The first Sailer takes the Bowl of Punch, walks in state round the +Stage, and sings; the others all follow.]</span></p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Here’s a Health to jolly Bacchus,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Here’s a Health to jolly Bacchus,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">For he will merry make us,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">For he will merry make us,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Then sit ye down together,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Then sit ye down together.<br /><span class='ralign'>[They all sit down with the Bowl in the middle.</span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><i>2 Sail.</i> Pshaw! Pox o’th’ this old Song, prithee let’s have a Dance.</p> + +<p><i>3 Sail.</i> With all my Heart; strike up Musick.<br /><span class='i ralign'>The Sailers and their Wives dance.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'><span class='n'>After the Dance.</span></p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>1 Sail.</span> So, well done my Lads, now let’s aboard amain,<br /></span> +<span class="i3">And suck our Faces o’re and o’re again.<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Brandy we’ve got enough, by this blest Chance,<br /></span> +<span class="i3">We’l nothing drink but Punch, when we get <span class='n'>France</span>.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><i>Omn.</i> Hoora! Hoora!<br /><span class='ralign'>Exeunt omnes.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>The End of the Third ACT.</p> + +<hr /><p class='pagenum'><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[29]</a></p> +<h2><a name="ACT_IV" id="ACT_IV"></a>ACT the Fourth.<br /> +<i>A Tavern.</i></h2> + +<p class='sd'><span class='ralign'>{2 Tables, three Chairs to each.</span><br /><br /> +Enter <span class='n'>Compasse, Peg,</span> and <span class='n'>Pettifog</span>.</p> + +<p class='sd'>A Drawer Meets them.</p> + +<p><i>Drawer.</i> Welcome Gentlemen. Please to walk into a Room?</p> + +<p><i>Compasse:</i> Aye Boy. Come Mr. <i>Pettifog</i>, please you sit.</p> + +<p><i>Pettifog:</i> With all my Heart; Come Mistress.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> What Wine will you be pleased to drink, Gentlemen?</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> Ask the good Woman: speak Mistress.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> Canary for her; I know what relishes her Palat best. A Quart of brisk Canary, +Boy.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> Ye shall have the best in <i>England</i>.—Coming, Coming, Sir.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> What call you this same Tavern, Mr. Attorney?</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> The King’s Head, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> The King’s Head: Marry, it has a good Neighbour of <i>Guild-hall</i>. It takes +many a fair Pound upon that ’n Account, I warrant you.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> (within) A Quart of Canary in the King’s-head, score.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Drawer, fills a Glass, and gives it <span class='n'>Compasse</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> Sir, Here’s a Glass of the richest Canary that ever came over, the very +Quintessence of the Grape I assure you.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> Say’st thou so? Why then there’s a Tester for thee, and so leave us—. +Come, Mr. <i>Pettifog</i>, [<i>Exit Drawer</i>] and ’t please you my Service to you.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Drinks.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> I thank you kindly, Sir.—Mrs. my Service to you, your Husband’s good +Health.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Drinks.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> With all my Heart indeed, Here my dear black ey’d Rogue, thy n’own good +Health.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Drinks.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> Thank you <i>Peg</i>, thank you, so now let’s mind our Business.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Mr. <span class='n'>Ventere</span>, his Wife, and <span class='n'>Dodge</span>, to another Table in the same Room.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Show a Room, Drawer.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> Here Sir.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Ne’re a private Room?</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> No Sir, the House is full.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> Ods fish, whom have we here, my Wife’s Merchant, with his Lawyer?</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[30]</a></span><i>Pett.</i> Ye know we promised to give him a Meeting here.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> ’Tis true we did so,—but come to the Business in hand.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Pettifog <span class='n'>and</span> Compasse <span class='n'>talk privately</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Well, bring us a Bottle of your best Red.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> You shall have it, Sir.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Drawer</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> And what do you think of my Cause, Mr. <i>Dodge</i>?</p> + +<p><i>Dodge.</i> O we shall carry it most certainly: You have Money to go through with the +Business; and ne’re fear but we’ll trounce them swingingly.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> I warrant you think it very strange, Mr. <i>Dodge</i>, that I am at this Charge +and Expence to bring a farther Charge upon me.</p> + +<p><i>Dodge.</i> Not I, I assure you, Sir, for I know you are a wise Man, and know very +well what you do; besides you have Money, Money enough, Sir.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Why the short and the long of the Business is this; I made a Purchase +lately, and in that I did estate the Child (about which I’m sued) Joint-Purchaser +with me in all the Land I bought.</p> + +<p>Mrs. <i>Ven.</i> Right Husband; and you know ’twas I that advised you to make the +Purchase, and therefore I’ll never give my Consent to have the Child brought up by +such a stinking Tar-barrel as now sues for him; he’d only bring him up to be a Swabber; +no, no, he was born a Merchant and a Gentleman, and he shall live and die so.</p> + +<p><i>Dodge.</i> You are a worthy Gentlewoman upon my word; there are but few of such a +noble Temper: But what makes the Fool of the Husband then so troublesome; does +he not know when he’s well?</p> + +<p>Mrs. <i>Ven.</i> So ’tis a sign.</p> + +<p><i>Dodge.</i> A Blockhead, to proclaim his own Disgrace, and make himself laugh’d at.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> That’s not it, he hopes to be the better by what is settled on the Boy.</p> + +<p><i>Dodge.</i> O, God’s so, that’s true: But never fear, I’ll be hang’d if he carry it, for +you have Money, as I told you, Sir, before: but see, Sir, there they are.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Yes, Yes, I saw them before: but come, where’s our Wine?<br /> +<span class='ralign'>(<i>Within</i>) [the Bell rings as at the Bar.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Drawer with a Bottle of Wine.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> Here Sir,—Coming, Coming, Sir: <i>Philip</i>, speak up in the Mermaid, +and bid <i>Jack</i> light a Fire.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Drawer</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Well Mr. <i>Pettifog</i>, and what think you of my Suit, Sir?</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> Why look you Sir, the Defendant you know was arrested first by a <i>Latitat</i> +in an Action of Trespass.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Yes, and a Lawyer told me, it shou’d have been an Action of the Case, did +he not, Wife?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> I have no Skill in the Law you know Husband, but the Gentleman did say so.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> Aye, but your Action of the Case in this Point is too ticklish.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Well, but pray tell me, do you think I shall overthrow my Adversary?</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> Without all doubt, the Child he says is none of yours, What of that! I marry +a Widow, and am by Consequence possess’d of a Ward. Now shall not I have the +Management of that Ward? Now Sir you lie at a stronger Ward, for <i>Partus sequitur +ventrem</i>, says the Civil Law: So that if you were within the Compass of the four Seas, +as the Common Law goes, the Child must be yours, that’s certain.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[31]</a></span> +<i>Comp.</i> Say you so, Sir? Why then the Child’s my own, for I have been a Coaster +these five Years and more; and so my Service to you: [Drinks]. O your Attorneys +in <i>Guild-hall</i> have a rare time on’t, by the Lord <i>Harry</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> They are as it were both Judg and Jury themselves.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> And O how they will laugh at their Clients when they sit in a Tavern, and +call them Fools, Blockheads and Coxcombs, and then whip up their Causes as nimbly +as a Barber trims his Customers on a <i>Christmas-Eve</i>; a Snip, a Wipe and away.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> That’s very common, you shall have the like at a <i>Nisi-prius</i>.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Drawer.</p> + +<p><i>Draw.</i> Here’s a Gentleman, one Mr. Justice <i>Merryman</i>, enquires for Mr. <i>Ventere</i> +the Merchant.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> Here Boy, desire them to walk up. [<i>Exit</i> Drawer.] ’Tis my Brother, +and a Counsellor, to make an End of this same Business.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Justice <span class='n'>Merryman</span> and a Counsellor; both Tables rise and join together.</p> + +<p><i>Merr.</i> Your Servant, Gentlemen, your Servant: Counsellor <i>Blunder</i> and I have been +canvasing the Business of this your Difference; and I believe, Brother, the Law will determine +it as we have done; for it is point blank against you.</p> + +<p>Mr. <i>Ven.</i> If it is, I must be contented: Well Sir, the Child’s your Wife’s, and you +shall have it; and to endear you the more to’t, I’ll settle my part of the Estate on you +and yours for ever: Give me your Hand.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[They shake Hands.</span><br /></p> + +<p>We now are Friends.</p> + +<p><i>Merr.</i> Why that’s well said.</p> + +<p><i>Couns.</i> We all are Witness to the Agreement.</p> + +<p><i>Omnes.</i> All, all.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Nay I scorn to be outdone in Civility; therefore if you please I have a Gallon +or two of Prize-Wine, and half a Dozen of good sound <i>Bruges</i>-Capons, which +I’ll treat you and this good Company with at Supper; but no more Mutton, no not a +bit.</p> + +<p><i>Merr.</i> Well Brother, I’m glad you’re Friends: Ods bobs I am. But come, let’s +home now, and see what’s become of the Bride and Bridegroom: Farewel Friend, +farewell: Come we’ll pay at the Bar.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exeunt <span class='n'>Merr.</span> Mr. <span class='n'>Vent.</span> and his Wife, <span class='n'>Couns.</span> and <span class='n'>Dodge</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Come <i>Peg</i>, Come and kiss me.<br /><span class='ralign'>[<i>Compass</i> kisses Peg.</span></p> + +<p>I am Friends with thee too now.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> Aye, aye, you have Reason, she has earn’d you a good Fortune; and need +not venture to Sea any more: Yet one thing let me advise you, ’tis Counsel worth a +good Fee, for it cures Cuckoldom.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Sayst thou so, come let’s hear it.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> This it is, Make a flat Divorce between your selves, be you no longer her +Husband, nor she your Wife: Two or three Hours after meet again, salute, woo and +wed afresh, and so the base Name of Cuckold’s blotted quite. This has been experienc’d +and approved by many.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[32]</a></span> +<i>Comp.</i> ’Tis excellent i’faith,—There, there’s for you; and I thank you. <i>Peg</i>, I +renounce thee,—nay and I renounce my self too from thee; thou art now a Widow, +<i>Peg</i>; I’ll go hang my self two or three Hours at one o’ th’ Main Yards, and so long +thou shalt go drown thy self. Then we’ll meet in <i>White-Chappel-Fields</i>, as it were by +chance, and woo and wed again.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> With all my Heart, kind Sir, fare you well.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Farewel Widow, remember Time and Place, and d’ you hear, Put on your +Sabbath-day best Clothes.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> I will, I will.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit Peg.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Sir, I am beholding to you for your good Counsel.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> No, Sir, you have paid me for ’t, but I hope you do not intend to follow +your own.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> What is that?</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> Why, you said you’d hang your self.</p> + +<p><i>Camp.</i> No no, I have thought better on’t, for I’ll go drink my self dead drunk, then +wake again, wash my Face, and meet the Bride.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> That’s well said, and I’ll accompany you, and wish you Joy.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Joy, Sir, I have it Sir already, in a good Estate got by a Chopping Boy.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Exeunt.</span><br /></p> + +<h3>SCENE II.</h3> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Friendly solus</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Was ever Fortune like to this of mine? Who for the Smile of a vile simple Woman, +have acted thus against my very Soul, all to please a Creature, whose next Command +perhaps will higher mount, it may be light on my self, as now it did on <i>Bonvile</i>.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Clara</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Ha! <i>Friendly</i> here alone. Now, now, my Fears begin.<span class='i ralign'>[Aside.</span><br /> +So, Sir, you are return’d I see.<span class='i ralign'>[To him.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Madam, I am, and like those noble Knights in former times, after subduing +all their Ladies Foes, returning with the joyful News of Conquest, receive her trembling +to their longing Arms, and claim her as their own, so I——.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> What mean you, Sir?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Madam, You are obeyed, your hard Commands fulfilled; at your Request +I’ve kill’d my Friend, nay and my best of Friends.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> How? kill’d your Friend for me.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Indeed ’tis true.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Then thou art truly wretched: But say, say quickly, who’s this unhappy +Man whom thy Mistake hath thus untimely kill’d?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> <i>Bonvile.</i></p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> <i>Bonvile</i> said you? My Blood with an unusual Course runs backward from my +Heart! Horror has seiz’d my Soul! A thick-black Mist has overcast my Sight, and I +am not the same: but speak, O speak again, Was it <i>Bonvile</i>?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Why shou’d you seek to iterate my Guilt, by a Rehearsal of that dreadful +<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[33]</a></span> +Name? Too sure, alas! It was: <i>Bonvile</i>’s the Friend I’ve kill’d.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Curs’d be the Tongue that spoke it, but doubly curs’d the Hand that did the +barbarous Fact.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Why Madam, was it not your Command to kill my Friend; nay more, my +best of Friends?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Yes, and I thought my self your best of Friends.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I hope you wou’d not have had me murder’d you?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> No, Monster, no.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> These are Riddles.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Fool, our whole Sex is made of nothing else: Thou mayst sooner untie the +Gordian Knot, expound the Problems of the monstrous <i>Sphynx</i>, and read what is +decreed in the mysterious Book of Fate, than unfold a Woman’s sly malitious Meaning.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Very well; she first set me on to do this most accurs’d of Deeds, and now upbraids +me; nay wou’d hang me for ’t: These are the Tricks of all her damning Sex. +O Woman, Woman, Woman, dear devilish Woman, farewel.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Offers to go.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Stay <i>Friendly</i>, all I have said was only to try your Constancy; and whether +you’d repent of what you’ve done. But tell me truly, is <i>Bonvile</i> surely dead?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Indeed he is.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> ’Tis bravely done, and I adore thee for ’t. By Heaven I love thee now, even +unto Dotage!</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Was ever Change like this? The subtlest Labyrinth Wit cou’d ere invent, +affords not half so many Turnings as a Woman’s Mind.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Aside.</span><br /></p> + +<p>What mean you, Madam, by this seeming Transport?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> O <i>Friendly</i>, <i>Friendly</i>, I am all o’re Extasy! Thou hast done a Deed that ravishes +my Soul. At once thou hast kill’d my dear and only Friend, and slain the fatal’st +Enemy I had.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> What more Riddles Madam, pray explain your self.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> I will; I will declare a Secret which till now I never did disclose: I lov’d that +<i>Bonvile</i> whom thou now hast slain, not as I ought to do, but with a Woman’s Love, +which he never did know: And Yesterday when I beheld the fatal Marriage ended, +then like a Merchant walking on the <i>Downes</i>, sees a rich Vessel of his own engaged, and +after took, and born away a Prize: So I, after I’d seen my <i>Bonvile</i> lost, (for so he +was to me) resuming all the Malice of a Woman, resolved never to entertain one +Thought of Love again; but lead a Life as <i>Lapland</i> Witches do, only on others Ruines: +Then when you approached me with the hateful Sound of Love, to dash your Hopes, +and put a Period to your growing Passion, I bid you kill your best and dearest Friend?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> True.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Now the best Friend to one in Love, is Love it self.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O my curs’d Stars, that wrap’d me up in such a black Mistake, What have I +done?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Done! Why you have done bravely, why do you tremble?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> An inward Guilt lies heavy on my Soul, and Horror with all her dreadful +Forms still haunts my Sight. And did you love this <i>Bonvile</i>?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> The Queen of Beauty never doted more on her beloved <i>Adonis</i> than I on +him.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> And now as much you hate him: O the unheard-of Inconstancy of Women! +All that they have is feign’d; their Teeth, their Hair, their Blushes, and their +<span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[34]</a></span> +Smiles; nay their very Conscience (if any such they have) is feign’d; all counterfeit +and false: Let them wash, patch and daub themselves with all the Helps for Nature +that Art cou’d e’re invent, still they are Women: And let ’em rob all <i>India</i> of its store +to adorn themselves therewith, still are they not all that thing call’d Woman: I know +not what to do, for I love and hate this Creature both at once.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> What ails my <i>Friendly</i>?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> But <i>Bonvile</i> yet must feel his Enemies Rage; shall he succeed in Love, whilst I +am cross’d in mine? No, it must not, cannot, nay it shall not be.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Four Heads I have, to make a Plot not common;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Malice, Revenge, the Devil, and a Woman.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Offers to go.</span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> What will you leave me then?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Leave thee; yes, forever: Fly thee as I wou’d a Blast from Hell: Thou art +thy self a Hell; thy base detested hateful Woman’s Breath infects the purest Air:</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">May my Friend’s Blood, which I for thee have spilt,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Light on thy Head, and your’s be all the Guilt.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exeunt <span class='n'>severally</span>.</span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Compasse</span> new clothed, <span class='n'>Pettifog</span>, and two or three Men Neighbors.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Gentlemen and Neighbours, as you have been Witnesses to our Divorce, so +shall ye now be Evidences to our next Meeting, which I look for every Minute.</p> + +<p>1st <i>Neigh.</i> I came for that Intent, Neighbour.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> I thank you: well, I do not think but you’ll all see me come off with as smooth +a Forehead, and make my Wife as honest a Woman as a Man wou’d desire sometimes, +I mean of her Rank; and a teeming Woman, as you know she has been: Nay, I do +not think but the Child too will be found to be as lawful a Child as any Couple of unmarried +People can beget.</p> + +<p>2d <i>Neigh.</i> We long to see it Neighbour <i>Compasse</i>, that so some of us may do the +like upon the same occasion.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> You’re in the right, old Stitch of the World: But soft, see where she comes +with a whole Bundle of as good sound Maidens as her self.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Peg</span> new cloth’d, with three or four Women Neighbours.</p> + +<p>Stand aside a little, and mind me I pray.</p> + +<p><i>Omnes.</i> Agreed, agreed.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Good Morrow fair Maid.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> In truth Sir you are mistaken in both, for I am neither fair, nor yet a Maid.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> No, what are you then I pray, a Wife?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> That indeed I was, but alas,—I am now a Widow.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> A Widow say you? Nay then I must make bold with you; for look you, +your Case is somewhat like mine, I being a Husband without a Wife.</p> + +<p>1st <i>Neigh.</i> Aye neighbour, this is something like.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> They begin well, let them go on.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[35]</a></span> +<i>Comp.</i> How long have you been a Widow, good Woman? Nay pray do not weep +forsooth.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> I can’t choose but cry, to think of the great Loss I had.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Why, was he an honest Man?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Honest quoth a’, I vow and protest he was as honest a Man as e’re broke Bread. +O I shall never have such another.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Cries out.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> By my Faith now Mistress you have had a great Loss indeed, for an honest +Man is not to be found every where, nor in every Street.</p> + +<p><i>Pett.</i> The Rogue’s witty.</p> + +<p>2d <i>Neigh.</i> Aye, aye, let ’em go on.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> And how long is it since you lost this honest Husband?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> O dear, his Memory is too fresh; and the Sight of you doubles my Sorrow.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> The Sight of me, say you; why, was he so like me?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> As one Apple to another; your two Hands are not more alike.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Nay then I cannot blame thee to weep: An honest Man he was I warrant +him; and you have had a mighty Loss, that’s the Truth on’t: But was he proportioned +like me, so well limb’d, and of such a wholesom Complexion, heh!</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> No Twins were ever more alike.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Well I love, his Memory is still better and better: and how many Children +did he leave behind him?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Only one, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> A Boy or a Girl?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> A dainty fine Boy, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Just my own case still; my Wife (rest her Soul) left me a Boy too, a lusty +chopping Boy of his Age (as they tell me, for I never saw it).</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> So is mine.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> And what Profession was your Husband of?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> A Seaman.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Heigh! my own Faculty too! And can you like a Man of that Profession +again?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Yes surely, for his dear sake, whom I lov’d so tenderly, I shall always esteem +a Sailer.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Shall you so? why then here’s your Man: What say you, Is’t a Match?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Dear me, I am so ashamed, and yet to speak the Truth, I do like you hugely, +and wou’d like you better still, if it were not for one thing, which a little troubles me.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> What’s that?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Why, you know sometimes we are forc’d to endure the Absence of our Husbands +a long while, mehappen many Years, and then if there be any Slip in us, (as long +Vacations will make Lawyers hungry) the World is apt to censure and scandalize us; +and brand us with wanton Living and Incontinency; when alas! if they wou’d but +consider our Condition, and the mighty Longings we often naturally have for Flesh +and Blood, they wou’d not blame us, so they wou’d not.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Come, come, no Matter, canst thou love me, Widow?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Ah, if I durst but speak my Mind, I know what I wou’d say.</p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> Durst, why who do you fear? here’s none but an honest Gentleman, some +few Friends and Neighbours; let them hear a God’s Name what you wou’d say, and +never blush for the Matter.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[36]</a></span> +1st <i>W. Neigh.</i> Aye, aye, speak Neighbour, pray speak your Mind, and fear not.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> I shall be thought too weak to yield at first Sight.</p> + +<p>2d <i>W. Neigh.</i> Paw! paw! that’s only Nicety.</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> Well then I do love him dearly and dearly, so I do.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Runs and kisses him.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Comp.</i> And I thee with all my Heart and Soul.<br /><span class='ralign'>[Comp. <i>kisses</i> Peg.</span><br /> +Now we’ll be merry, and have a Song, shall we not my Neighbours?</p> + +<p>3d <i>Neigh.</i> Marry will we, Neighbour <i>Luff</i> and Mrs. Bride, will ye give us a Song?</p> + +<p><i>Peg.</i> With all my Heart, come Neighbour.</p> + +<p class='noin c'>A DIALOGUE.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Man:</span> Faith and Troth I love thee dearly,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Tho I do but bluntly woo,<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Prithy then resolve me clearly,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Whether I am beloved by you.<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Long I shall not keep a pother,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Like a senseless whining Beau;<br /></span> +<span class="i3">If you won’t I’ll court another<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Who will never say me no.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Woman:</span> Friend, your self, nor Humour neither<br /></span> +<span class="i5">With my Fancy disagree,<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Yet I must find clearer Weather<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Er’e I venture out to Sea.<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Court another at your Pleasure<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Win her in the Honey-moon,<br /></span> +<span class="i3">She may chance repent at leisure,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">For believing you too soon.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Man:</span> Leave your damn’d Fantastick Trials,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Which procure a Lover’s Pain,<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Pox upon these sham-Denials,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">’Tis but spending time in vain.<br /></span> +<span class="i3">With Embraces happy make me,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Nature fram’d you to be kind;<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Kiss me, and the Devil take me<br /></span> +<span class="i5">If I ever change my Mind.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Woman:</span> I’ll pursue the good old Fashion,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Practise still by those are wise,<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Throughly try my Lover’s Passion,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">E’re I let him grasp the Prize.<br /></span> +<span class="i3">Spite of Oaths you wou’d forsake me,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Shou’d I let you once embrace:<br /></span> +<span class="i3">If I kiss, the Devil take me,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Till the Parson has said Grace.<br /></span> +</div></div> +<p class='pagenum'><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[37]</a></p> +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class='i8 n'>Chorus<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Since then Nation<br /></span> +<span class="i5">Has made it a Fashion,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Let’s send for a Black Coat, whilst we’re in the Mind.<br /></span> +<span class="i5">But it is damn’d Slavery,<br /></span> +<span class="i5">And Priestly Knavery,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">That Parsons must conjure e’re Lovers be kind.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><i>Com.</i> So, so, here now shall we be Man and Wife again to Morrow, as good as +ever. What thô we met as Strangers, we may happen to love ne’re the worse for +all that—Gentlemen and Neighbours, I invite ye all to my Wedding.</p> + +<p><i>Omnes.</i> We’l not fail you, and wish you Joy.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> Did I not tell you that I would fetch it cleverly off? +Let any Man call me Cuckold if he dares now.</p> + +<p><i>Petti.</i> ’Tis slander in him I assure you who-ever does.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> Nay it will be <i>Petti Lacenary</i> at least, and without Compass of the General +Pardon too: And for the Child, let me hear him that dares say, I am not the Father.</p> + +<p><i>Petti.</i> Sure none will dare dispute it.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> Or that my Wife that is to be, is not as honest a Woman as some other Mens +Wives are.</p> + +<p><i>Petti.</i> No question of that.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> O how fine and smooth my Brows are now!</p> + +<p><i>1 M. Neigh.</i> Aye but when you’re married, they’ll come to themselves again I warrant +ye.</p> + +<p><i>Com.</i> My Friends, if you please, you may call me Mr. Bridegroom now, for the +Guests are all bidden to the Wedding.</p> + +<p><i>1 M. Neigh.</i> We know it, Mr. Bridegroom, they are Indeed, and we’ll not fail you +upon our Words.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Comp.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Come then, brisk Widow, e’re the next Ebb and Tide,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’le be thy Bridegroom, and thou sha't be my Bride.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><span class='i ralign'>Exeunt omnes.</span><br /></p> + +<p class='sd'>The End of the Fourth ACT.</p> + +<hr /><p class='pagenum'><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[38]</a></p> +<h2><a name="ACT_V" id="ACT_V"></a>ACT the Fifth.</h2> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Arabella</span> on one Side.</p> + +<p class='sd'><span class='n'>Summerfield</span> meeting her from the other.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Mr. <i>Summerfield</i>, I now am truly happy, my Prayers at last are heard; and +Heaven has restored my Husband to my Arms.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I just now heard the joyful News, and thought to have been my self the welcome +Messenger of his Return, but find I’me come too late; have you seen him?</p> + +<p><i>Art.</i> No; as yet I have not.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> ’Tis somewhat strange!</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Others perhaps may judg it so, but my uncommon Joy for his Return, admits +no other Thought, but those of Transport for his Safety.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> O happy <i>Bonvile</i>! How I admire and wonder at thy Choice!</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Friendly</span>.</p> + +<p>Madam, a Wife like you, exceeds the greatest Blessing sure on Earth.</p> + +<p><i>Fr.</i> [<i>Aside.</i>] The nearest way to a secure Revenge, is private Malice, which, like +a Spark long lying hid amongst neglected Ashes, by the least Blast of Wind +becomes it self a Flame—Ha!, who have we here? Thrice blest Occasion! +which thus have offered me at once the Scope of my revengeful Wishes. ’Tis +<i>Arabella</i> and her Darling <i>Summerfield</i>, one who, in the Bridegroom’s Absence, +is grown thus intimate with his beloved Bride. A strong Foundation on +which I’ll now erect a brave Revenge; I’ll step aside and observe them.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[Retires to one side of the Stage.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Sir, I hope he’ll soon be here, and return the Kindness you have shown me; +so I take my leave, with hourly expectation of a much-long’d for Husband.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> And I, with a Gratitude never to be forgotten, kiss your fair Hand, and +hope that all things will answer your Expectation.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Arabella</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Ay, ’tis so, now must I counterfeit a friendly Face to make a farther Discovery. [<i>Aside.</i>]<br /> +Sir, your humble Servant: without Offence, may I be so bold as to beg the Favour of +your Name?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> The Question I must confess is somewhat familiar, and in my Opinion improper +for a Stranger at first sight; but yet I ne’re disown’d it to a Gentleman—’tis +<i>Summerfield</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Fri. Summerfield!</i> Sir, I kiss your Hand;, and must congratulate your good Success, +but more admire your Valour. Had we many such noble Commanders on board +our Fleet, we need not fear it where e’re it sails.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[39]</a></span> +<i>Sum.</i> Pray, Sir, stretch not your Love into Flattery, ’twill make me then suspect +your Kindness. And the Author of this Story was too much my Friend I see, since +he has given you this so very partial Account, the more to augment my Fame.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O! that’s your Modesty, Sir: But if I might be so happy as to be honour’d +with your Acquaintance——</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Sir, the Honour (if any) would be wholly on my Side; therefore I desire +to know your Name.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> <i>Friendly</i>, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> An Acquaintance; I suppose, of Mr. <i>Bonvile’s</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> One that thinks himself much honour’d in being stiled his Friend.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I have often heard your Name indeed before; but till now Fortune never afforded +me the sight of you.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> You of all Men ought to bless Fortune, who still has been indulgent to you +on all Occasions; and scatter’d her Favours on you, with as prodigal a Hand as thô +you were her sole Care and only Minion.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> What mean you, Sir? Again you exceed the Bounds of Love and Friendship; +I never thought any of <i>Bonvil’s</i> Friends cou’d be guilty of so base and vile a +thing as Flattery: But, pray, unfold your meaning.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> ’Tis this; I just now saw you part with the Bride, with such courteous Actions, +as spoke no small Esteem in her kind Favour; and therein I think you the happiest of +Men.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> How!</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Mistake me not, I only as a Friend applaud your Happiness, bless the +Influence of your kinder Stars, and praise your Fortune that hath given you this sweet +Occasion.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> What Occasion, Sir?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Of being serviceable to the fair Virgin Bride in her extreamest need, after her +being so unkindly left, nay, on her Wedding Day, by an ungrateful Husband, in doing +her those neglected Duties, her Youth and Beauty justly did demand.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> On my Life some Plot against the Bride: I’ll sound him ’till I find the very +Bottom—[<i>Aside.</i>]—Sir, you are merry: But suppose the Case your own, +wou’d you have miss’d so tempting an Occasion?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> No, Sir, they’re too precious to be omitted: But I hear you two call Cousins, +comes your Kindred by the <i>Merryman’s</i> or the <i>Bonvile’s</i>?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Neither! we were wholly Strangers ’till of late, and ’tis a word of Courtesy +only interchange’d between us for some private Reasons.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> This goes as I cou’d wish. <span class='i ralign'>[Aside.]</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I desire you not to grow too inward with me, on so short an Acquaintance: +Not that I’de have you think the Lady of so base a Disposition to grant me any thing +beyond the Rules of Decency and Honour. The only Favour I e’re receiv’d from her, +was a Present of those Bracelets she wears about her Arms, and that Chain of Gold +and Pearl she has about her Neck; all which either of us may own without a Blush.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> How, the Chain and Bracelet, say you! Those were the first Tokens of her +Husband’s Love.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Methinks you look concern’d at what I’ve said; yet I have said no more than +what I am obliged in Honour to maintain, and will: therefore I hope, as you’r a Gentleman, +you’l not turn Informer.</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[40]</a></span><i>Fri.</i> O pray think not so poorly of me.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter a Servant who whispers <span class='n'>Summerfield</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Tell her I’le wait on her immediately.<span class='i ralign'>[Exit Servant.</span><br /> +Sir, some Business of Importance calls me hence; therefore some other time I hope I +shall have the Happiness of enjoying your Company longer.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Sum</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Sir, your humble Servant.<br /> +Tell her I’ll wait on her immediately, said he; this must be <i>Arabella</i> that he’s going +to: Better still.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">The Work’s begun, now I am made or lost;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">He runs the best who holds out to the Post:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And all the Comfort in Adversity,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Is to see others as miserable as me.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p>Who have we here? Old <i>Merryman</i>! As I live ’tis he!</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Justice <span class='n'>Merryman</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> O Master <i>Friendly</i>, you’re happily returned: But where’s my Son-in-Law?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Alas, Sir, the unhappy <i>Bonvile</i> is——</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Is, is, what is he? Heh! speak; is he living, or is he dead; or what’s become +of him?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O! that I had the Marble <i>Niobes</i> Heart! Or that I had suck’d the Milk of +Wolves and Tigers; so that I might have told, without the least remorse of Sorrow, +what now I dare not, nay, I cannot speak, for fear at once I melt my self in Tears, +and break your aged Heart.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Seems to weep.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Then I suppose he’s killed; say, is he not? Hast thou inticed him from his +Bride for this, thou inhumane Wretch? Yet speak, and tell me truly, for I’m prepared +to hear the worst of Ills; Is he then slain?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> No, Sir, but dangerously wounded.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Not mortally, I hope; but whereabouts is he so desperately wounded? In his +Arms, his Legs, or Body?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Neither, Sir, but in as perfect Health as when he left you.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Strange! sure thou art all o’re a Mystery, and form’st these Riddles to try +my Wit.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> No, Sir, for all I have said, you in effect will surely find I told you he was +wounded, did I not?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Yes, you did.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> And so he is.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> But where, whereabout, I ask you once again?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I see you force the unwilling Secret from me—Why, he’s wounded.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> He’s wounded, he’s wounded, but where, where is he wounded?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> In his Fame, Honour and Reputation, more mortal than a thousand fleshy +Wounds.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">For such slight Baubles, Cures are oft obtain’d;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But injur’d Honour ne’re can be regain’d.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[41]</a></span> +<i>Mer.</i> How! how! how’s this? wounded in his Honour, fay’ll thou? Tell me the +Villain that has defam’d him, and this good old Sword shall slit the Rascal’s Wind-pipe.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O, Sir, your Daughter, your Daughter, Sir——</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ha! what’s that? what’s that? is she injur’d too?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> No, no Sir, my falling Tears quite drown my feeble Voice, I cannot utter +what I fain would speak—Your Daughter’s false, false to her <i>Bonvile</i>! And by the +help of her beloved <i>Summerfield</i>, has robb’d my Friend of all he cou’d call Dear, I +mean his Fame.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Seems to weep.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> A Pox o’ your Crocodile’s Tears. Why, Sirrah, Sirrah, do you call my +Daughter Whore? Hey, Swords and Daggers, Blunderbusses and Pistols, shall I +bear this? Hark you, you my Friend, and no Friend, what a Kin do you take me +to be to this Gentlewoman, Heh?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Her Father, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Audacious Villain, O that I had thee in some private Corner, where none +you’d either see or hear us, this Sword shou’d justify my Daughter’s Honour; I’de +Whore you with a Pox to you, so I wou’d.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Your Pardon, Sir, I only did inform you as a Friend, that by your fatherly +Admonitions, you might refrain her from her undecent Course.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Pox o’ your friendly Intelligence.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> The Jewels which her Husband did present her, as the first Sign and Confirmation +of the happy Contract, she to my certain Knowledg has given to——</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> To whom, to whom thou wicked Slanderer? tell me, Sarrah, quickly, quick, +quick.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> To <i>Summerfield</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ha, ha, ha, the Fool makes me laugh; Ha, ha, ha, why ’twas but just now +that I saw e’m on her Neck and Arms.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> She was no Woman, had she not the Sense to get them against her Husband’s +coming.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> But pray tell me, how is’t possible that she cou’d part with ’em, when they +are lock’t on, and the Key with her Husband?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> O, Sir, that’s no Question to be ask’d in these Times: Women <i>have found a +way to make use of other Keys besides their Husbands: And no doubt but</i> Summerfield <i>has +got a Key will open your Daughter’s lock as well as</i> Bonvile’s.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Sirrah you lie, you lie Sirrah; and I’le tell thee thou ly’s, again and again, +so I will. Nay, and I were to pay a 100 Pounds for every Lie I give thee, as Men do +Twelve-pence for every Oath they swear, I wou’d spend all the Thousands I am +worth, in giving thee the Lie. ’Tis likely indeed, that such a brave Gentleman as +<i>Summerfield</i>, that fought at Sea like a Dragon to save my Life, should shorten my Days +on Land in ruining my Daughter; therefore once more I tell you you Lie.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> ’Tis very well.</p> + +<p><i>Me.</i> Do you hear Sir, have you told this Lie to any body else but me?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> I am no Informer, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Why then for fear you shou’d, do ye see, draw, [<i>Draws</i>] Draw, I say, I +am not so old but I can make a shift to cut your Throat still; I’le spoil your Carking, +I’le warrant ye.</p> + +<p class='sd'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[42]</a></span>Enter <span class='n'>Bonvile</span> and <span class='n'>Clara</span>.</p> + +<p>A Pox on’t, here’s my Son-in-Law come to hinder me, Duce take him cou’d he not +stay a little longer? D’ye hear Sir, begon, leave this Place immediately, or I’le—I’le—I’le—Gad +I cou’d find in my Heart, so I cou’d, but be gone.</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> <i>Bonvile</i> here with <i>Clara</i> too, excellent. This goes to <i>Arabella</i>, and may it +encrease the Storm.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Frie</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> My Father in Anger.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> O Son, Son, Son! dear Boy, welcome home, Od’s bobs you are.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> I humbly thank you, Sir; but am sorry to see you so disturb’d.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Nothing, nothing, only Mr. <i>Friendly</i> and I have had a Word or two, that’s +all, that’s all.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> About my going with him, I suppose; but that’s past, and I hope, Sir, you’l +be so kind as at my Request to pardon him.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Indeed Son it was something else; By the Lord <i>Harry</i> I can’t forbear laughing +at the Coxcomb, Ha, ha, ha; He told me, Ha, ha, ha, that one <i>Summerfield</i>, a +very honest Fellow as ever liv’d, is grown exceeding familiar with my Daughter, +your Wife.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Ha! my Wife.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Yes, your Wife, and that he had received Love-Tokens from her.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> How, Love-Token from her!</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Aye, aye, Love-Tokens I call’d ’em when I was a young Man: Nay, the +Rogue was so impudent to tell me, that she had given him those Jewels which are +lock’d about her Neck; Ha, ha, ha.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> The Jewels about her Neck, said you?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i>. Aye, what ails you Man that you change Colour so? ’Tis all a Lie Boy I +warrant thee: And hadst thou not come just in the Nick of Time, I think o’ my Conscience +I shou’d have cut his Throat.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> As I will your Daughters if I find her false: Death, Hell, and Furies, am I +made a Monster already?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> What, Sir, are you return’d for this?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Hark y’ son, hark you; suppose that this Mr. <i>Friendly</i> shou’d have a secret +Inclination to your spouse, d’ ye see; and therefore, by reason he can’t obtain his Desire, +possesses you with Jealousy to make a Breach ’twixt you and your Wife. Od’s +bobs, I don’t know, I can’t tell what shou’d be the meaning of his carrying you away +on your Wedding-Day, else, heh, Son, heh.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Has the Italian Plague then infected you, that you stand thus unmov’d?</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Summerfield</span> leading <span class='n'>Arabella</span>.</p> + +<p>But see here’s your Bride.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> And her beloved Adulterer with her! Death and Damnation, must I stand +still and see this?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Hey day! what the Matter now?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> <i>Bonvile</i> here with <i>Clara</i>! Alas too true I find what before I scarce dar’d to +think was so. Is <i>Bonvile</i> then a Traitor, and false to <i>Arabella</i>?<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Aside.</span><br /></p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[43]</a></span> +<i>Cla.</i> Madam, at last I’ve found the pretious Jewel that you so long have sought in +vain.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[<span class='n'>To</span> Arab.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Wear it your self Madam, I lost it, and it must be mine no more.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> What means this sudden Alteration?</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ods bodikins, as you say, what does she mean? Are ye both mad, heh?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Sir, I’m come to pay my Respects to you, and humbly beg a farther Knowledg of——.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Of whom, sweet Sir, my Wife or me?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Ha! your Wife.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Yes Sir, my Wife, I think the word needs no explaining.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Pray, Sir, at my Request bear with him, he’s strangely out of Order I assure +you.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> The Jewels are as I left ’em ; but the Jewel of her Heart is lost and thrown +away.—Madam, I sent you my Will, did you receive it.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Yes, I did.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Let me see it.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> You shall. <span class='i ralign'>[Exit <span class='n'>Ara</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Sir, I desire a Word or two in private with you, <span class='i ralign'>[to <span class='n'>Summer</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> With all my Heart, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> What’s that, what’s that, I’ll have no Whispering, Gentlemen.</p> + +<p class='sd'>Enter <span class='n'>Arabella</span> with the Will.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> There’s your Will, Sir.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Throws it down, <span class='n'>Bonvile</span> takes it up.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> ’Tis well now as you’ve chang’d your Mind, I’ll change this too, and find +another to supply your Place: There’s no harm done, the Marriage is not yet consummated, +and you are free to enjoy any, so am I.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> As you please for that: A Man may make a Garment for the Moon, count all +the Stars which twinckle in the Skies, or empty the vast Ocean, Drop by Drop, +sooner than please a Mind so light, so various as yours.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ods bobs, what’s this you talk of, altering your Will?</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> Yes, Sir, I am so resolved, and will see ’t perform’d within this Hour: My +Lawyer lives hard by, and so farewel.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit. Bon.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Farewel thou peevish Boy, I can alter my Will too so I can, marry can I; +I had left him 20000 Pound after my Death, and he shall see I can find another Executor +too. Within this Hour did he say, Gad I’ll be with one as soon as he, unless he +rides Post to the Devil, and that’s the nearest way to a Lawyer.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> I’ll follow him, and asswage his Passion.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> By no means, Sir.—But now I think on’t, I’ll go with you, and find him +out: But did you ever see the like, did you ever see the like? Come Sir, come follow +me.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Exit. <span class='n'>Merr. & Summer</span>.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Dear <i>Arabella</i> what can all this mean?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> Can you be doubtful of the Effect, who are your self the Cause?</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> I the Cause, Inform me how?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> O <i>Clara, Clara</i>, your Syrens Voice has drawn my <i>Bonvile</i> from these spotless +Virgins Arms, and made me ever wretched!</p> + +<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[44]</a></span> +<i>Cla.</i> Who (if thou ever lov’dst me) tax’d me with a Crime +so foul, as I abhor to hear it only named?</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> <i>Friendly.</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> O <i>Arabella</i>, forgive and pity me, who am indeed the innocent, unhappy +Cause of all those Griefs which now afflict you both; which I’ll relate in brief, if you +will please to withdraw one Moment with me.</p> + +<p><i>Ara.</i> With all my Heart.</p> + +<p><i>Cla.</i> Come then:</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">And since your Ruine I did first conspire,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I’ll all appease, thus Fire’s expell’d by Fire.<br /><span class='ralign'>[<i>Exeunt.</i></span><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='sd'>Enter Justice <span class='n'>Merryman</span> and <span class='n'>Summerfield</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Sir, do you take me for your Friend?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Why d’ you ask me such a Question, Sir? ’twere base Ingratitude to entertain +any other Thought.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Why then d’ ye see, Sir; as you are my Friend, you must not fight my Son +<i>Bonvile</i>.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Not fight him Sir! you amaze me.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Aye, aye, aye; that’s all one: I understand your dumb Signs and your low +Whispers, the French Mode all over, to smile and grin a Man in the Face, and at the +same time privately cut his Throat. Therefore prithe be ruled by me, and don’t +fight him, for shou’d you kill him, my poor Girl wou’d break her Heart, quite break +her Heart. [<i>Sobs and cries.</i>] I grant that you are wrong’d, and so I dare swear is +my dear Child: but he’s her Husband, and must be born with, ods bobs he +must.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Heaven be my Witness, I ne’re entertain’d a Thought like it!</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> That’s well, that’s well, I am heartily glad on’t, ods bobs I am heartily +glad.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[<span class='n'>Enter</span> Friendly.</span><br /> +But here comes one that has made all this Mischief; and him I’ll fight my self for all +I’m a Justice of the Peace. Come, come, Sir, Draw, draw; you’ll belie my Daughter +again wil you? Come, draw, I say, Draw.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Draws.</span><br /></p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Sir, as I am a Gentleman, I scorn to deny my Words, but there’s my Author, +whether good or ill.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Who, he? He, do ye mean him?</p> + +<p><i>Fri.</i> Yes, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> True, Sir, I am; For, at his Return to Town from <i>Barn-Elms</i>, it was my +Chance to meet him; and after a ceremonious Complement or two, I found him +diving into my private Thoughts concerning the Bride your Daughter: I, not to be +behind-hand with him, join’d Wit with Wit to sound his shallow Soul. I told him +then, how her Jewels once were mine; but the manner of my obtaining them, I for +my own sake did conceal from him; and now, if you’re disposed, I’ll here relate +it.</p> + +<p class='sd'><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[45]</a></span> +Enter <span class='n'>Bonvile</span> leading <span class='n'>Arabella, Clara</span> and <span class='n'>Spruce</span>, Mr. <span class='n'>Venter</span> and Mrs. <span class='n'>Venter</span>.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Let it be before all this Company then: What, and my Son and Daughter +too so loving again? Nay then all’s well, ods bobs it is, and they shall hear it, ods +bobs they shall.</p> + +<p><i>Bon.</i> I have heard the Story, Sir, already; and <i>Friendly</i>, you I pardon too, for +Enemies in War take all Occasions to undo each other; yet tho I am your Enemy, +I’ll be generous still, and make you Master of your wish’d for Mistress.<br /> +<span class='i ralign'>[To <span class='n'>Clara</span>.]</span><br />Come, Madam, receive this worthier Passion of your <i>Friendly</i>, whom I +know you both admire and love.<br /><span class='i ralign'>[Gives her to <span class='n'>Friendly</span>.</span><br /> +Next I must obtain your Pardon for my Rashness.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Sir, ’tis what I first ought to have begg’d of you: And that the World +may’nt tax this innocent Lady of a Crime to her purest Thoughts unknown, I’ll here +begin my Story from my first Acquaintance to this happy Hour.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Prithy do.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> The first time that I e’re beheld her Face, I wou’d have robb’d her.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ah Rogue! What, a Thief, a Thief, what wou’d you have robb’d her of?</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> Not her Honour, I assure you, Sir, but only of those Jewels which she +wears.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ods bobs, thou wert an honest Thief, for that I faith he was.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> They being fast, I cou’d not get ’em off without some Harm and Pain to her: +which for the <i>Indies</i> I’d not have done. And she, in answer to my Civility, brought +me home, and ransom’d them with the full Price in Gold, (with which I made my +Venture) and the more to hide my Shame, she honour’d me with the Title of her +Kinsman.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ay, ay, and so she might well; for she was a little cunning Thief too, to +steal the Gold she gave you from her Husband; ’twas all his now, but that’s no matter, proceed.</p> + +<p><i>Sum.</i> The rest you know already, Sir.</p> + +<p><i>Mer.</i> Ay, so I do, ods bobs I do, thy Valour my brave Boy, thy Valour, for +which I’ll do for thee, that thou shalt never need to rob again I warrant thee; ods +bobs I will. But come, come, we lose time, for we have another Wedding yet to +be perform’d, but that shall be done within.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Sum.</span> Then farewel all ye treacherous Paths of Vice,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Which lead Men blindfold to their End,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">In time like me repent you that are wise,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">And by Restraint your vicious Courses end.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Ara.</span> Were I to ask of Heaven its greatest Bliss<br /></span> +<span class="i2">On Earth, it cou’d bestow not one like this.<br /></span> +<span class="i2">After a Storm the Sun still shines most bright,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">And from the Chaos sprung the purer Light.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[46]</a></span> +<span class="i0"><span class='n'>Bon.</span> A Day like this sure yet has never been,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Wherein such various Changes e’re were seen.<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Fortune to Day that work’d my Overthrow,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Has made me happy in a Minute now.<br /></span> +<span class="i2">Bless’d with a vertuous Wife my Days I’ll spend,<br /></span> +<span class="i2">And ne’re trust Man, lest I mistake my Friend.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<hr /> +<h2><a name="EPILOGUE" id="EPILOGUE"></a>EPILOGUE,</h2> + +<p class='noin c'>Spoke by the City-Bride.</p> + +<div class="i poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">You met with good Intention to be witty,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And rally the Grave Cuckolds of the City;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">But disappointed of your Recreation,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I in your Looks can read the Play’s Damnation.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Lord! how ye stare to find an honest Bride,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">A thing you think a Monster in <span class='n'>Cheapside</span>.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Whither you boast that you so often come,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And leave your footmen to perform at home.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Yet ’tis no little Comfort t’ us howe’re,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">You oftner bring th’ Estate than get the Heir.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Unjustly therefore you your Fortune blame,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">She’s kinder to your Blood that to your Name.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">After all this, I know you think it Pity,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">That I shou’d break the Custom of the City:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">I hear a Beau cry, ’tis some damn’d Mistaker;<br /></span> +<span class="i0">A <span class='n'>Cheap-side</span> Vertue, City Cuckold maker.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">This is a Fault no Gentleman can pardon,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">It gives <span class='n'>Cheapside</span> the Sins of <span class='n'>Covent-Garden</span>:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">We must refine on Vice, and take new Measures,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Since dull chain’d Cits invade our darling Pleasures.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">Take my Advice, employ at home your Backs,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Or <span class='n'>Locket’s</span> Revels may revenge <span class='n'>Pontack’s</span>:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">This Cuckolding to you’s a losing Trade,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">That pay for making, and for being made.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">The Ladies will my Character excuse,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">And not condemn a Vertue which they use.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"><span class='pagenum'><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[47]</a></span> +<span class="i0">If any here be guilty of Transgression,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">’Tis of Necessity, not Inclination:<br /></span> +<span class="i0">They’d be contented in their proper Houses,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Cou’d they reform their unperforming Spouses.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Yet if some wanton Appetites there be,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">How many are there that can fast like me.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">Those are enow, if I have their Applause,<br /></span> +<span class="i0">The Poet has his End, and I my Cause.<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p class='noin c mt2'>FINIS.</p> + +<hr /> +<h2>PUBLICATIONS OF THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY</h2> + +<p class='noin'><span class='sc'>First Year</span> (1946-47)</p> + +<p>Numbers 1-4 out of print.</p> + +<p class='hi'>5. Samuel Wesley’s <i>Epistle to a Friend Concerning Poetry</i> (1700) and <i>Essay on +Heroic Poetry</i> (1693).</p> + +<p class='hi'>6. <i>Representation of the Impiety and Immorality of the Stage</i> (1704) and +<i>Some Thoughts Concerning the Stage</i> (1704).</p> + +<p class='noin'><span class='sc'>Second Year</span> (1947-1948)</p> + +<p class='hi'>7. John Gay’s <i>The Present State of Wit</i> (1711); and a section on Wit from +<i>The English Theophrastus</i> (1702).</p> + +<p class='hi'>8. Rapin’s <i>De Carmine Pastorali</i>, translated by Creech (1684).</p> + +<p class='hi'>9. T. Hanmer’s (?) <i>Some Remarks on the Tragedy of Hamlet</i> (1736).</p> + +<p class='hi'>10. Corbyn Morris’ <i>Essay towards Fixing the True Standards of Wit, etc.</i> (1744).</p> + +<p class='hi'>11. Thomas Purney’s <i>Discourse on the Pastoral</i> (1717).</p> + +<p class='hi'>12. Essays on the Stage, selected, with an Introduction by Joseph Wood Krutch.</p> + +<p class='noin'><span class='sc'>Third Year</span> (1948-1949)</p> + +<p class='hi'>13. Sir John Falstaff (pseud.), <i>The Theatre</i> (1720).</p> + +<p class='hi'>14. Edward Moore’s <i>The Gamester</i> (1753).</p> + +<p class='hi'>15. John Oldmixon’s <i>Reflections on Dr. Swift's Letter to Harley</i> (1712); and +Arthur Mainwaring’s <i>The British Academy</i> ( 1712).</p> + +<p class='hi'>16. Nevil Payne’s <i>Fatal Jealousy</i> (1673).</p> + +<p class='hi'>17. Nicholas Rowe’s <i>Some Account of the Life of Mr. William Shakespeare</i> +(1709).</p> + +<p class='hi'>18. “Of Genius,” in <i>The Occasional Paper</i>, Vol. III, No. 10 (1719); and Aaron +Hill’s Preface to <i>The Creation</i> (1720).</p> + +<p class='noin'><span class='sc'>Fourth Year</span> (1949-1950)</p> + +<p class='hi'>19. Susanna Centlivre’s <i>The Busie Body</i> (1709).</p> + +<p class='hi'>20. Lewis Theobold’s <i>Preface to The Works of Shakespeare</i> (1734).</p> + +<p class='hi'>21. <i>Critical Remarks on Sir Charles Grandison, Clarissa, and Pamela</i> (1754).</p> + +<p class='hi'>22. Samuel Johnson’s <i>The Vanity of Human Wishes</i> (1749) and Two <i>Rambler</i> +papers (1750).</p> + +<p class='hi'>23. John Dryden’s <i>His Majesties Declaration Defended</i> (1681).</p> + +<p class='hi'>24. Pierre Nicole’s <i>An Essay on True and Apparent Beauty in Which from Settled +Principles is Rendered the Grounds for Choosing and Rejecting Epigrams</i>, +translated by J. V. Cunningham.</p> + +<p class='noin'><span class='sc'>Fifth Year</span> (1950-51)</p> + +<p class='hi'>25. Thomas Baker’s <i>The Fine Lady’s Airs</i> (1709).</p> + +<p class='hi'>26. Charles Macklin’s <i>The Man of the World</i> (1792).</p> + +<p class='hi'>27. Frances Reynolds’ <i>An Enquiry Concerning the Principles of Taste, and of +the Origin of Our Ideas of Beauty, etc.</i> (1785).</p> + +<p class='hi'>28. John Evelyn’s <i>An Apologie for the Royal Party</i> (1659); and <i>A Panegyric +to Charles the Second</i> (1661).</p> + +<p class='hi'>29. Daniel Defoe’s <i>A Vindication of the Press</i> (1718).</p> + +<p class='hi'>30. Essays on Taste from John Gilbert Cooper’s <i>Letters Concerning Taste</i>, 3rd +edition (1757), & John Armstrong’s <i>Miscellanies</i> (1770).</p> + +<p class='noin'><span class='sc'>Sixth Year</span> (1951-1952)</p> + +<p class='hi'>31. Thomas Gray’s <i>An Elegy Wrote in a Country Church Yard</i> (1751); and +<i>The Eton College Manuscript.</i></p> + +<p class='hi'>32. Prefaces to Fiction; Georges de Scudéry’s Preface to <i>Ibrahim</i> (1674), etc.</p> + +<p class='hi'>33. Henry Gally’s <i>A Critical Essay</i> on Characteristic-Writings (1725).</p> + +<p class='hi'>34. Thomas Tyers’ A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson (1785).</p> + +<hr /> +<h2>William Andrews Clark Memorial Library: University of California<br /> +<span class='sc'>The Augustan Reprint Society</span></h2> + +<p class='sd'>General Editors</p> + + +<div class='center'> +<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary=""> +<tr><td align='left'><span class='sc'>H. Richard Archer</span></td><td> </td><td align='left'><span class='sc'>R. C. Boys</span></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'><span style="margin-left: 2em;">William Andrews Clark Memorial Library</span></td><td> </td><td align='left'><span style="margin-left: 2em;">University of Michigan</span></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'><span class='sc'>E. N. Hooker</span></td><td> </td><td align='left'><span class='sc'>John Loftis</span></td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'><span style="margin-left: 2em;">University of California, Los Angeles</span></td><td> </td><td align='left'><span style="margin-left: 2em;">University of California, Los Angeles</span></td></tr> +</table></div> + +<p class='noin'>The Society exists to make available inexpensive reprints (usually facsimile reproductions) of rare +seventeenth and eighteenth century works. The editorial policy of the Society continues unchanged. As +in the past, the editors welcome suggestions concerning publications. All income of the Society is devoted +to defraying cost of publication and mailing.</p> + +<p>All correspondence concerning subscriptions in the United States and Canada should be addressed to the +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library, 2205 West Adams Boulevard, Los Angeles 18, California. Correspondence +concerning editorial matters may be addressed to any of the general editors. The membership fee is +$3.00 a year for subscribers in the United States and Canada and 15/- for subscribers in Great Britain and +Europe. British and European subscribers should address B.H. Blackwell, Broad Street, Oxford, England.</p> + +<hr class='minor' /> + +<p class='noin c'>Publications for the sixth year [1951-1952]<br /> +(At least six items, most of them from the following list, will be reprinted.)</p> + +<p class='hi'><span class='sc'>Thomas Gray</span>: <i>An Elegy Writt in a Country Church Yard</i> (1751). Introduction by George Sherburn.</p> + +<p class='hi'><span class='sc'>James Boswell</span>, <span class='sc'>Andrew Erskine</span>, and <span class='sc'>George Dempster</span>: <i>Critical Strictures on the New Tragedy of +Elvira</i> (1763). Introduction by Frederick A. Pottle.</p> + +<p class='hi'><i>An Essay on the New Species of Writing Founded by Mr. Fielding</i> (1751). Introduction by James A. Work.</p> + +<p class='hi'><span class='sc'>Henry Gally</span>: <i>A Critical Essay on Characteristic Writing</i> (1725). Introduction by Alexander Chorney.</p> + +<p class='hi'>[<span class='sc'>John Phillips</span>]: <i>Satyr Against Hypocrits</i> (1655). Introduction by Leon Howard.</p> + +<p class='hi'><i>Prefaces to Fiction.</i> Selected and with an Introduction by Benjamin Boyce.</p> + +<p class='hi'><span class='sc'>Thomas Tyers</span>: <i>A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson</i> ([1785]). Introduction by Gerald Dennis Meyer.</p> + +<p>Publications for the first five years (with the exception of <span class='sc lc'>NOS.</span> 1-4, which are out of print) are available at +the rate of $3.00 a year. Prices for individual numbers may be obtained by writing to the Society.</p> + +<hr class='minor' /> + +<p class='noin c'>THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY<br /> +<i>WILLIAM ANDREWS CLARK MEMORIAL LIBRARY</i><br /> +<span class='sc'>2205 West Adams Boulevard, Los Angeles 18, California</span><br /> +<br /> +Make check or money order payable to <span class='sc'>The Regents of the University of California</span>.</p> + +<div class='bbox'> +<h3>Transcriber’s Notes & Errata</h3> + +<p>Spellings of names, abbreviations and a number of other words, +punctuation including the use of apostrophes, use of accents, +hyphenation and italicisation are very inconsistent in the text. They +have been transcribed as in the text, except for very obvious +typographical errors.</p> + +<p>Embedded stage directions in the text have been left in situ, enclosed +in square brackets.</p> + +<p>End-of-line stage directions in the text have been placed on their own +lines.</p> + +<p>The following words occur in both hyphenated and unhyphenated forms in +the text. The number of instances of each word are given in parentheses.</p> + +<div class='center'> +<table border="1" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary=""> +<tr class='b'><td align='center' colspan='2'>Hyphenated</td><td align='center' colspan='2'>Unhyphenated</td></tr> +<tr class='b'><td align='center'>Word</td><td align='center'>Instances</td><td align='center'>Word</td><td align='center'>Instances</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Cheap-side</td><td align='right'>1</td><td align='left'>Cheapside</td><td align='right'>2</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Hoo-ra</td><td align='right'>2</td><td align='left'>Hoora</td><td align='right'>3</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>me-thinks</td><td align='right'>2</td><td align='left'>methinks</td><td align='right'>4</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>Merry-man</td><td align='right'>2</td><td align='left'>Merryman</td><td align='right'>10</td></tr> +<tr><td align='left'>who-ever</td><td align='right'>1</td><td align='left'>whoever</td><td align='right'>1</td></tr> +</table></div> + +<p>The following obvious typographical errors have been corrected.</p> + +<div class='center'> +<table border="1" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary=""> +<tr class='b'><td align='center'>Page</td><td align='center'>Error</td><td align='center'>Correction</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>1</td><td align='left'>is is</td><td align='left'>is</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>2</td><td align='left'>wihin</td><td align='left'>within</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>5</td><td align='left'>the</td><td align='left'>thee</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>5</td><td align='left'>the the</td><td align='left'>the</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>6</td><td align='left'>Names</td><td align='left'>Name</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>6</td><td align='left'>Speaker's name omitted.</td><td align='left'>Fri.</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>19</td><td align='left'>Salvage</td><td align='left'>Savage</td></tr> +</table></div></div> + + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The City Bride (1696), by Joseph Harris + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + +***** This file should be named 22974-h.htm or 22974-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/2/9/7/22974/ + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The City Bride (1696) + Or The Merry Cuckold + +Author: Joseph Harris + +Commentator: Vinton A. Dearing + +Release Date: October 12, 2007 [EBook #22974] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + + + + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + + + +The Augustan Reprint Society + +JOSEPH HARRIS + +_The City Bride_ + +(1696) + +With an Introduction by +Vinton A. Dearing + +Publication Number 36 + +Los Angeles +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library +University of California +1952 + + +GENERAL EDITORS + +H. RICHARD ARCHER, _Clark Memorial Library_ +RICHARD C. BOYS, _University of Michigan_ +ROBERT S. KINSMAN, _University of California, Los Angeles_ +JOHN LOFTIS, _University of California, Los Angeles_ + + +ASSISTANT EDITOR + +W. EARL BRITTON, _University of Michigan_ + + +ADVISORY EDITORS + +EMMETT L. AVERY, _State College of Washington_ +BENJAMIN BOYCE, _Duke University_ +LOUIS BREDVOLD, _University of Michigan_ +JAMES L. CLIFFORD, _Columbia University_ +ARTHUR FRIEDMAN, _University of Chicago_ +EDWARD NILES HOOKER, _University of California, Los Angeles_ +LOUIS A. LANDA, _Princeton University_ +SAMUEL H. MONK, _University of Minnesota_ +ERNEST MOSSNER, _University of Texas_ +JAMES SUTHERLAND, _University College, London_ +H. T. SWEDENBERG, JR., _University of California, Los Angeles_ + + +CORRESPONDING SECRETARY + +EDNA C. DAVIS, _Clark Memorial Library_ + + + + +INTRODUCTION + + +_The City Bride_, by Joseph Harris, is of special interest as the only +adaptation from the canon of John Webster to have come upon the stage in +the Restoration. Nahum Tate's _Injur'd Love: or, The Cruel Husband_ is +an adaptation of _The White Devil_, but it was never acted and was not +printed until 1707. _The City Bride_ is taken from _A Cure for a +Cuckold_, in which William Rowley and perhaps Thomas Heywood +collaborated with Webster. F. L. Lucas, Webster's most recent and most +scholarly editor, remarks that _A Cure for a Cuckold_ is one of the +better specimens of Post-Elizabethan romantic comedy. In particular, the +character of the bride, Annabel (Arabella in Harris's adaptation), has a +universal appeal. _The City Bride_, a very close copy of its original, +retains its virtues, and has some additional virtues of its own. + +Not much is known of its author, Joseph Harris. Genest first notices him +as playing Bourcher, the companion of a French pirate, in _A +Common-Wealth of Women_. Thomas Durfey's alteration of _The Sea Voyage_ +from the Beaumont and Fletcher folio, which was produced about September +1685. His subsequent roles were of a similar calibre, but if he never +rose to be a star he seems to have become a valued supporting player, +for in 1692 he was chosen to join the royal "comedians in ordinary." He +did not at first side with Thomas Betterton in his quarrel with the +patentees of the theatre in 1694-5, but he withdrew with him to +Lincoln's Inn Fields. Genest notices him for the last time as playing +Sir Richard Vernon in Betterton's adaptation of _1 Henry IV_, which was +produced about April 1700. + +During his career on the stage Harris found time to compose a +tragi-comedy, _The Mistakes, or, The False Report_ (1691), produced in +December 1690; _The City Bride_, produced in 1696; and a comedy and a +masque, _Love's a Lottery, and a Woman the Prize. With a New Masque, +call'd Love and Riches Reconcil'd_ (1699), produced about March 1698/9. +_The Mistakes_ is clearly apprentice work, for Harris acknowledges in a +preface the considerable help of William Mountfort, who took the part of +the villain, Ricardo. Mountfort, who had already written three plays +himself, cut one of the scenes intended for the fifth act and inserted +one of his own composition (probably the last) which not only clarified +the plot but also elevated the character of the part he was to play. The +company seems to have done its best by the budding dramatist, for Dryden +wrote the prologue, a rather unusual one in prose and verse, and Tate +supplied the epilogue. Harris professed himself satisfied with the +play's reception, but owned that it was Mountfort's acting which really +carried it off. + +_The City Bride_, on the other hand, shows its author completely +self-assured, and rightly so. No doubt some of his ease comes from the +fact that he had nothing to invent, but in large part it must derive +from his ten-years' experience on the stage. Harris added nothing to the +plot of _The City Bride_, although he commendably shifted its emphasis, +as his title makes clear, from infidelity to fidelity; but he rewrote +the dialogue almost completely, and the new dialogue is remarkable good. +The reader will notice that it is, except for the last half of the first +act, printed as prose. The quarto of _A Cure for a Cuckold_, from which +Harris worked, is also largely printed as prose, but has correct verse +lineation in the same portion of the first act. It is the more +remarkable that Harris, following thus closely the apparent form of his +original, could vary from it so successfully. Most notable, probably, +are the passages in which he intensified the expression of his source. +They may indicate no more than the eternal "ham" in our author; but I +think they probably indicate as well a new style of acting, more +rhetorical in one way, more natural in another. A good example, in which +the new rhetoric is not oppressive, is the account of the sea fight at +the end of Act III. Even when Harris followed his original most closely, +we seem to hear the actor, speaking in a new tongue, in a more relaxed +and colloquial rhythm. The reader will find it both amusing and +instructive to compare the two versions of Act II, scene ii. The new +cadences do more than merely prove that Harris had no ear for blank +verse. + +_The City Bride_ does not conform to the dominant type of Restoration +comedy, but it belongs to a thriving tradition. Domestic comedy, in +adaptations from the Elizabethans, had been staged at intervals for +twenty years before _The City Bride_ appeared, and the type was of +course destined to supplant gay comedy in the near future. Harris was +not, therefore, going against the taste of the town; on the contrary he +was regularly guided by contemporary taste and practice. His stage is +less crowded: he amalgamated the four gallants of _A Cure for a Cuckold_ +in the person of Mr. Spruce, at the expense of a dramatic scene (I, ii, +31-125); and he ended the sub-plot with the fourth act instead of +bringing its persons into the final scene, with some loss of liveliness +and a concomitant gain in unity of effect. He modernized his dialogue +entirely, bringing up to date the usage and allusions of his original, +and restraining the richness of its metaphor by removing the figures +altogether or by substituting others more familiar. He omitted a good +deal of bawdry, especially in Act II, scene ii. All these changes have +parallels in other Restoration adaptations. Again, the songs and dances, +which are all of Harris's composition, reflect the demand of the +Restoration audience for excitement, variety, novelty, in their dramatic +fare. When in Act III, scene i, Harris meets this demand by making +Bonvile bare his breast to Friendly's sword, and Friendly a little later +grovel at Bonvile's feet for pardon, we may condemn the new business as +bathetic; but when in Act IV, scene i, he substitutes for Webster's +emaciated jokes the bustle of drawers, the sound of the bar bell, and +healths all around, we can only applaud the change. + +We must also commend Harris for supplying a consistent and relatively +believable motivation for the main action. In both _A Cure for a +Cuckold_ and _The City Bride_, Clare (Clara) begins the action by giving +her suitor, Lessingham (Friendly), a cryptic message: he is to determine +who his best friend is and kill him. In _A Cure for a Cuckold_, it is +never made clear whether the victim should have been Bonvile or Clare +herself (she apparently intended to trick Lessingham into poisoning +her). This uncertainty has only recently been noticed by students of the +drama, who have been forced to emend the text at IV, ii, 165 (see +Lucas's note on the passage). Harris's solution is simpler. He will have +nothing to do with either murder or suicide. Clara explains to Friendly +that the best friend of a lover is love itself. + +This is not the place to enumerate all the differences between _A Cure +for a Cuckold_ and _The City Bride_; indeed the reader may prefer making +the comparisons for himself. Harris's alterations follow the general +pattern of Restoration adaptations from the earlier drama, it is true. +On the other hand, a relatively small number of such plays allow us to +see the professional actor feeling his way through the emotions and +actions of the scenes. To compare a play like _The City Bride_ with its +source is like visiting the rehearsals of an acting company of the time. +Such a play has an immediacy and liveness that strongly appeals to those +who delight to image forth the past. + +_The City Bride_ has never been reprinted. The present edition +reproduces, with permission, the copy in the Henry E. Huntington +Library, omitting Harris's signed dedication to Sir John Walter, Bart., +on A2^r-A3^r (A1^v in the original is blank). The top line on page 44, +which is partly cut away, reads: _Cla._ Who (if thou ever lov'dst me ... + +Vinton A. Dearing +University of California +Los Angeles + + + + +THE CITY BRIDE: + +OR, + +The Merry Cuckold. + +A COMEDY, + +Acted at the New Theatre, in _Little +Lincolns Inn-Fields._ + +BY + +His Majesty's Servants. + +_First Edition._ + +_Spero Meliora._ + +LONDON: + +Printed for _A. Roper_ and _E. Wilkinson_ at the _Black-Boy_, and R. +_Clavel_ at the _Peacock_, in _Fleet-street_. 1696. + + + + +PROLOGUE: + +_Spoke by Mr._ THURMOND. + + + _Three Ways there are, and all accounted fair, + To gain your Favour: Begging, Borrowing, Prayer. + If as a Beggar, I your Alms implore } + Methinks your Charity shou'd aid the Poor; } + Besides, I never beg'd of you before. } + If I address by Prayer, and loud Complaints + I then oblige yee, for I make you Saints; + And sure none here can think it Superstition, + To pray to Saints that are of no Religion! + If Invocation will not do my Work, + A Man may borrow of a_ Jew _or_ Turk; + _Pray lend me Gentlemen your Applause and Praise, + I'll take it for as good as Currant Bays; + And if I ne're repay it, 'tis no more, + Than many of you Sparks have done before: + With this distinction, that you ran indebt + For want of Money, we for want of Wit. + In vain I plead! a Man as soon may get + Mill'd Silver, as one favour from the Pit. + ----Hold then----now I think on't, + I'll e'en turn Thief, and steal your kind Affection, + And when I've got your Hearts, claim your protection: + You can't convict me sure for such a crime, + Since neither Mare nor Lap-dog, I purloin: + While you Rob Ladies Bosoms every day, } + And filch their pretious Maiden-heads away; } + I'll plead good nature for this Brat the Play: } + A Play that plagues no more the thread-bare Theme + Of powder'd Beaux, or tricks o'th' Godly Dame, + But in your humours let's ye all alone, + And not so much as Fools themselves runs down. + Our Author try'd his best, and Wisemen tell, + 'Tis half well doing to endeavour well: + What tho' his poor Allay runs not so fine; + Yet, let it pass as does our present Coin; + For wanting fairer Ore, and riches mould + He stamps in Brass, what others print in Gold: + Smile on him but this time, the next perhaps, + If he guess right he may deserve your Claps._ + + + + +Dramatis Personae. + + + |Bonvile, _The Bridegroom_. |_Mr._ Boman. | + |Friendly, _His Friend, in Love with_ Clara. |_Mr._ Thurmond. | + |Justice Merryman, _Father to_ Arabella. |_Mr._ Bright. | + |Summerfield, _A Gentleman, but Younger Brother, | | + | necessitated to take the High-Way_. |_Mr._ Scudemore.| + |_Mr._ Ventre, _A Merchant._ |_Mr._ Arnold. | + |_Mr._ Spruce, _A City Beau._ |_Mr._ Bayly. | + |Compasse, _A Master of a Vessel._ |_Mr._ Freeman. | + |A Councellor. |_Mr._ Davis. | + |Pettifog, } |_Mr._ Trefusis. | + | } _Two Attorneys._ | | + |Dodge, } |_Mr._ Eldred. | + | | | + |_Sailers, Neighbours, Drawers, Servants, Boys, | | + | Singers and Dancers._ | | + | | | + |Arabella, _The Bride_. |_Mrs._ Boman. | + |Clara, _Friendly's Mistriss, but secretly in Love | | + | with_ Bonvile. |_Mrs._ Boutell. | + |_Mrs._ Ventre, _The Merchant's Wife_. |_Mrs._ Lacy. | + |Peg, _Compasses Wife_. |_Mrs._ Perin. | + |Nurse. |_Mrs._ Lawson. | + |Lucy, Clara's _Maid_. |_Miss_ Prince. | + | | | + |_Women Neighbours._ | | + + +SCENE _London_. + + + + +THE CITY BRIDE: +OR, THE +Merry Cuckold. + + + + +ACT I. SCENE the I. + + _The Curtain draws up, and discovers several sitting at a Banquet. + An Entertainment of Instrumental Musick, Compos'd by Signior_ + Finger: _Then a Song, set by Mr._ John Eccles, _and Sung by Young_ + La Roche. + +SONG. + + _Many I've lik'd, and some Enjoy'd, + But if I said I Lov'd, I ly'd. + Inconstant as the wandring Bee, + From once touch'd Sweets I us'd to flee; + Nor all the Power of Female Skill, + Cou'd curb the freedom of my Will:_ + Clarinda _only found the Art, + To Conquer and so keep my Heart._ + +[_After this a Dance, and then the Scene shuts._ + +Enter_ Friendly _and_ Clara. + +_Friend._ This is a Day of Mirth and Jollity my _Clara_. + +_Clara._ 'Tis so, for such as can be merry, Mr. _Friendly_. + +_Friend._ Why not for us my Love, we have a Noble President, and +methinks shou'd Imitate (thro Envy) this their happiness. + +_Clara._ I am not of your Opinion. + +_Friend._ Why not my Fair? + +_Clara._ I'll tell you, because I purpose not to Marry. + +_Fri._ Prithee be serious, and reform that Thought: Think of my past +Service, and judge by that my future; weigh all the respect I have paid +you long, and ever lov'd you beyond my self. + +_Cla._ I know your Weakness, and will reward it too. + +_Fri._ I am sure you will, you must be kind; And can you think an Answer +of this killing Nature, a just return for all my faithful Love? + +_Cla._ As to that I have already said. + +_Fri._ Oh speak, from whence this Coldness doth arise! Be at least so +kind as to tell me that; Is it some late Disgust you have conceived of +my Person; or rather your desire, (I fear) of some unworthier, happy +Creature, base in the Attempt, as you unkind in thinking of a Change; if +neither. + + _I must impute it to your Woman's Will, + Still pleased with what it fancies, Good or Ill._ + +_Cla._ Be't what it will, thus it is, and with this Answer pray rest +satisfied; there is but one way ever to win me and draw me unto +Marriage, which whosoever finds, 'tis like he may have me, if not, I am +still my own. + +_Fri._ Oh name it then! Thou dearest Treasure of my Life! my Soul! my +All! I am in a maze of Extasie, to think there's any means to gain you, +and hope you'l be so kind to tell me how I may be happy. + +_Cla._ I'll retire a while; and with my self resolve what must be done, +and in the end send you my Resolution. + +[_Exit_ Clara. + +_Fri._ I'll here expect it: What more can I desire, than now be +satisfied and know my Dooom. + + _Suspence is the worst Torment we endure, + 'Tis Knowledge make the Wound both safe and sure._ + +_Enter_ Spruce _and_ _Mr._ Venter. + +_Spru._ How now _Jack_! What all alone Man? + +_Fri._ No, for I have heard some say, Men are ne're less alone, then +when alone. The reason I suppose is this, because they have Crowds of +Thoughts, that still perplex the Mind; which wou'd be, like the Soul +retired and free, thereby to enjoy that sweet repose, which nought but +that can Grant. + +_Spru._ Pshaw! Pox of this Morality and dull Stuff; Prithee let us be +Merry, and Entertain the Bride and Bridegroom. Ods fish there a parcel +of rare Creatures within! But of all Mrs. _Clara_ for my Money. + +_Mr. Ven._ And truly, I am of your Opinion Mr. _Spruce_; for setting +aside her present Melancholly and Discontent, I think she is beyond +Comparison with any other. + +_Spr._ Od's nigs, I know the Cause of her Disorder. + +_Ven._ What I pray? + +_Spr._ Why, I'll tell ye; In all Conditions of Estates, Professions, and +Degrees, in Arts or Sciences, yee know there's a kind of Envious +Emulation. + +_Mr. Ven._ Right. + +_Spr._ So in this of _Arabella_'s Marrying; for _Clara_ being Lady of +much the same Birth and Quality, Grieves I--suppose to see her Rival get +the start of her. + +_Mr. Ven._ Troth like enough. + +_Fri._ Y'are Pleasant Gentlemen--Or else because she having had so many +Courtiers---- + +_Spr._ And you among the rest _Jack_. + +_Fri._ She now perhaps does cast a more favourable Eye upon some one +that does not like her. + +_Spr._ Why Faith, and that may be too. + +_Enter_ Lucy _with a Letter._ + +_Lucy._ Sir, my Mistriss presents her humble Service to you, and has +sent you this Letter; pray Heaven it be to your liking Sir. + +_Fri._ I thank the kind _Lucy_: There, there's for the Postage Girle: +[_Gives her Money._] She has kept her Promise for once I see; I'm +resolved to read it, tho I were sure my Death was Comprehended in it. + + Reads. _Try all your Friends, and find out the best and nearest to + your Heart, That done, be sure to kill him for my sake. This fail + not to do, if you respect and Love (as you pretend.)_ + + Clara. + +'Tis as I fear'd, and what I know she most desires: Mischief, and +Murder, are all her Sexes Practice, and Delight? Yet such is the +Extravagancy of my Passion, I must obey the Mandate, tho to my certain +Ruine: 'Tis strangely difficult, and does require Mature Deliberation. + +[_Exit._ + +_Spr._ What has _Friendly_ left us? + +_Mr. Ven._ I believe the Letter was the occasion, it may be it was a +Challenge. + +_Spr._ A Challenge! No, no; Women don't use to bring Challenges, I +rather believe 'tis an Amour; And that Letter as you call it a _Billet +Deux_, which is to Conduct him to the place appointed; and in some Sence +you may take that for a Challenge. + +_Mr. Ven._ And she the Civil Embassadress to usher him in. + +_Spr._ Yes, yes, but see the Bride and Bridegroom, with the rest of the +good Company. + +_Enter Justice_ Merry-man, Bonvile, Arabella, _Mrs._ Venter _and others, +as Guests Invited to the Wedding._ + +_Mer._ Son _Bonvile_, what call ye the Gentleman we met at the Garden +Door? + +_Bon._ _Friendly_ Sir, a most approv'd and worthy Gentleman, and one of +my chiefest Guests. + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, it may be so: But yet me thought he seemed somewhat +displeased, tho Son, Hah, What think you? + +_Bon._ No sure Sir, he cannot be Angry, when his Friend's so happy. + +_Mer._ I can't tell Boy, but I believe there's something more than +ordinary in the matter. Why should he leave the Company else? And Mrs. +_Clara_ I miss her too. Why Gentlemen, why do you suffer this? + +_Ara._ Unknown to any Sir, she withdrew soon as we rise from Table. + +_Mer._ Sick of the Maid perhaps; because she sees you Mrs. Bride her +Quondam Play fellow Married before her; Heh Gentlemen, heh! + +_Mr. Ven._ 'Troth like enough Brother _Merry-man_. + +_Mer._ Go, go, find her out for shame Gentlemen; and do not stand idle +thus, Od's bobs, when I was a Young fellow and invited to a Wedding, I +used to frisk and Jump, and so bestir my self, that I made all the +_Green-sickness_ Girles in the Room blush like Rubies. Ah, hah! I was a +brisk Fellow in those Days, I'faith, and used to Cut Capers a Yard high: +Nor am I yet so Old, but I can take a round or two still--Come, come +Gentlemen, lets in again and firk it away, shall we not? + +_Spr._ With all my Heart Mr. Justice. + +_Mer._ Why that's well said Mr. _Spruce_, Ods bobs it was, and I thank +you heartily. + +_Spr._ Come Madam, you must along with us, without you all's nothing. + +_Arab._ I'll wait on you Gentlemen; if you will give me leave Sir. +[_To_ Bonvile. + +_Bon._ Oh my best Joy! This Day you may Command. + +_Mer._ That's right, that's right I'faith Gentlemen! This Day she +Commands, and he for ever after. Ods bobs I have done so my self, and +hope I shall do so still. Sister _Venter_, May I presume to ask if my +Brother can say as much? + +[_Exit_ Bonvile, Arab. Spruce, _and the rest of the Guests._] + +_Mrs. Vent._ Yes Brother, I think he may, I freely Give him leave. + +_Mer._ Observe that Brother, she freely gives you leave: But who Gives +leave the Master or the Servant? + +_Mr. Ven._ You are Merry Brother, and truly you have reason, having but +one Daughter and see her Married as you would have her. + +_Mer._ Yes, I have one thank Heaven! You wou'd be glad Sister you cou'd +say so, but your Barrenness does give your Husband leave (if he please) +to look for Game elsewhere. + +_Mrs. Ven._ Well, well Sir, tho you jeer me, and make a scorn of my +Sterility-- + +_Mer._ No, no, not I Sister, I scorn not your Sterility, nor your +Husbands Virility neither. + +_Mrs. Ven._ My Husband's Virility! Pray spare my Husband; for he has not +been so idle as you imagin; He may have an--Offspring abroad for ought +you know, that you never heard of. + +_Mr. Ven._ Oh fye Wife, You will not make it publick will you? + +_Mrs. Ven._ And yet he keeps himself within compass for all that. + +_Mr. Ven._ If you love me _Winny_-- + +_Mrs. Ven._ Na, I say no more, but thereby hangs a Tale. + +_Mer._ Say'st thou so old Girle? What and has he been stragling then? +Nay; nay I know he is a Ventersome Man; And a--Merchant of small Wares +sometimes, especially when he can get a good Commodity: I love him the +better for't I'faith, Ods bobs I do--A notable spark with a Young Wench +in a corner, Is he not? A true Chip of the old block, his Father I +warrant him--But Sister, I have something to say to you in private, +concerning my Daughter. + +_Enter Nurse._ + +_Nurse._ By your leave Good Folks, Is Master _Venter_ the Merchant here +I pray? + +_Mr. Ven._ Oh Nurse! I am glad to see thee, How does my Boy? + +_Nurse._ Very well, I thank Heaven Sir! He grows bravely I assure you. +'Tis a Chopping lad I promise you, and as like your good Worship; As if +he had been spit out of your Mouth. + +_Mr. Ven._ Softly, Nurse softly. + +_Nurse._ I protest 'tis one of the forward'st Infants in the Universe; +Lord! how it will Crow, and Chirup like a Sparrow! I am afraid Sir he is +about Teeth, for he Dribbles extreamly, if so, Your Worship must provide +him a Silver Corral with a Whistle and Chain. + +_Mr. Ven._ Well, well, he shall have everything Nurse, my Wife shall +send them to ye; in the mean time, there, there's a Piece, to buy thee a +Pair of Gloves, and so leave us, for I am busie at present, therefore +steal away behind me, and slip out at the back Door. + +_Nurse._ Yes Sir, I am gone, Heavens bless your Worship, a Piece! Marry! +and that's a sufficient Charm to lye up any Nurses Tongue in +_Christendom_. + +[_Ex. Nurse_ + +_Just. Mer._ Well well, it shall be done: Come Brother we are mist I +warrant you amongst the Young Fry, let's to 'um and, Dance till our Legs +ake again, come I'll lead the way. + +_Mr. Ven._ We follow you. + +[_Exeunt._ + +_Enter_ Friendly _Reading the Letter._ + +_Fr._ Heaven in its excess of Goodness, bestow'd no greater Blessing on +Mankind than that of Friendship--To Murder any one is a Crime +unpardonable! _But a Friend!--And of all Friends the nearest to my +Heart_,--'Tis such an Imposition that Hell it self 'till now cou'd never +parallel; And yet this Devil of a Woman has power over me beyond all +Virtue. I am distracted in my Thoughts, and know not what to do; yet +something must be done without delay, or else I lose her quite: And yet +I fear 'tis most Impossible, for Friendship left the World, when Justice +fled, and all who now do wear that Name are the worst of Hypocrites, + + _Like Counterfeited Coin on which is seen, + The formal Stamp; but sordid Dross within._ + +_Enter_ Bonivile. + + _Bon._ My Friend alone and Thoughtful? say for what? + That you alone appear with Discontent, + When all my Friends Congratulate my Bliss? + Is it because (which I durst ne're suspect) + Your Love to me was not intirely true? + Or else perhaps, this Crown of Happiness + You think Misplac'd, and Envy it not yours. + + _Fri._ Forbear such cruel Words-- + How can you entertain a Thought so Vile + Of him whom so long you have call'd your Friend? + May all the Blesings Heaven can bestow + On us poor Mortals in this World below, + Crown all your Days, and may you nothing see + But flowing Tides of sweet Felicity; + But I, alas!-- + + _Bon._ Alas! What means my _Friendly_? + Much hidden Grief that wretched Word portends, + Which thus disturbs the Quiet of my Friend? + But come disclose it to me, + And since the Burthen is too much for one, + I'll bear a part to ease thy troubled Breast. + + _Fri._ Oh _Bonvile_! + Seek not to force this Fatal secret from me-- + + _Bon._ I must know it, by my best hopes I must. + + _Fri._ Oh no! I cannot, Nay I dare not-- + + _Bon._ How dare not trust a secret to a Friend? + + _Fri._ Oh _Bonville_, _Bonville_! Call me not your Friend, + That Name strikes horrour to my very Soul. + + _Bon._ Ha! Art thou then a Stranger to that Name? + + _Fri._ Indeed I am, and must be so for ever now. + + _Bon._ Yet hear me _Friendly_; Deny me if thou can'st, + Fixt as a Rock, I vow I'll here remain, + Until I have forc'd this Dire secret from thee. + + _Fri._ Pardon me Sir, I hope you soon will hear it, + But I---- + + [_Offers to go._] + + _Bon._ Yet stay, and since intreaty can't prevail, + By all the Friendship which you once profess'd, + By all that's Holy, both in Heaven and Earth, + I now Conjure thee to impart it to me, + Or by this Life---- + + _Fri._ Hold, hold, and since I can no longer hide it + Know 'tis my Honour then which lyes at Stake. + + _Bon._ Thy Honour! How? Proceed. + + _Fri._ By chance a Quarrel happen'd to arise + Betwixt another and my self, The Field, + Time, Place, and all appointed, + Nay Seconds must assist us in the Deed: + I have relied on many seeming Friends, + (Such as profess the bare and empty Name) + And all refuse to venture in my Cause. + + _Bon._ Is this all? + + _Fri_ All, Is it not enough? To see my Reputation, + (the Lifes Blood of my Soul) + Nay all that's Dear, in Danger to be lost. + + _Bon._ Not while thy _Bonvile_ lives and wears a Sword: + May all things frown that I wou'd have to smile, + May I live Poor, and Dye despised by all, + If I out live the ruine of thy Honour! + Tell me the time my Friend? + + _Fri._ Oh, spare me that, for, if once known the time, + You'l Cancel this your promise, and recall + Your Friendly proffer. + + _Bon._ Away with these Excuses, come the time. + + _Fri._ At Seven this Evening. + + _Bon._ The place? + + _Fri._ _Barn-Elms_: + Oh the fatal place! Where I too well foresee, + The certain fall and Ruine of my Honour! + + _Bon._ No, Thou shalt not stay to forfeit thy lov'd Honour, + Come I'm ready to assist my Friend; and will along with you. + + _Fri._ Alas. What mean you? + Of all my Friends on you I ne're Relied; + But sure I Dream, I Rave, by Heav'ns I'm Mad! + My _Bonvile_ leave his Wife? And on his Wedding Day? + His Bride whom he perhaps may ne're Enjoy? + And all for me? O most unhappy Man! + + _Bon._ Pleasure before my Friend I'll ne're prefer, + Nor is it lost, tho for a while, delay'd. + + _Fri._ Are you then resolv'd to go? + + _Bon._ I am as fixt in my Resolve as is the _Libertin_ in vice, + Which Death alone can part. + + _Fri._ Yet stay, and think what it is you undertake, + Recall this Rash and suddain Resolution, + Least you repent, alas when it is too late. + + _Bon._ This were enough to shake a weaker Soul, + But mine it moves not; like to a Mighty Oake, + I'm plac'd above the Storms of Fear or Doubt. + +_Enter_ Arabella. + + _Fri._ Sir, no more, the Bride, + + _Ara._ Oh, Heavens defend me! + + _Bon._ What ailes my Dearest Life? + + _Ara._ I've lost the Key of this Chain I wear about my Neck + And of these Bracelets, Oh! Unhappy Omen! + +_Bon._ No, no, my Love; I found it as it lay at Random in your Chamber, +and fearing it might be forgot, or lost, have laid it by; 'Tis safe my +Love. + +_Ara._ Indeed I'me very glad you've found it, but yet---- + +[sighs. + +_Bon._ Yet, What my Dear? from whence proceeds that sigh? + + _Ara._ Alas, I know not! + Some busie Genius Whispers to my Soul, + The loss of this upon my Wedding Day + Portend's a greater e're the Day be past. + + _Bon._ Banish such Fears, let's in and see our Friends. + + _Ara._ Indeed they all expect you; come I'll lead the way. + + _Bon._ I'll go with you. _Barn-Elms_ you say? + + [_Aside to_ Friendly. + + _Fri._ Yes that's the place, at Seven precisely; + + _Bon._ I'll meet you on the _Exchange_, and go together; + If you are there before me, Take a turn or two. + + [_Exit_ Bonvile, _and_ Arabella. + + _Fri._ Oh my Dear _Bonvile_! Art thou then the Man? + The only, only Man that I can call Friend, + And only Friend that I am bound to Kill? + A Friend, that for my sake wou'd stake his Life, + Leave a Chast Bride and untouch'd Nuptial Bed + For me base Man, nay worse than Savage Beast: + The generous Lyon, never kills his kind + They say, altho provoked to utmost rage; + Yet I vile Monster, more ungrateful Man, + Thus unprovoked, must kill my Brother Creature, + And which is worse, my Dear and only Friend! + All for the pleasure of a Foolish Woman. + + _O cruel Woman thus to Command + A Task so hard, Yet what I can't withstand! + Oh! thou rare Copy of the Original, + By which free Man at first received his fall; + For she not only wou'd her self undo, + And all her Sex, but Damn all Mankind too._ + + [_Exit._ + +_The End of the First Act._ + + + + +ACT the Second. + + +SCENE the First. + +_The Fields._ + + +_Enter_ Summerfield _solus._ + +_Sum._ A Younger Brother! 'Tis a poor Title, and very hard to bear with: +The Elder Fool inherits all the Land, whilst we are forc'd to follow +_Legacies of Wit, and get 'um when we can_. Why shou'd the Law, by which +we are deprived of equal Portion with the First-begotten, not bind our +Fathers to cease from Procreation, and so as well deprive us of a +wretched Being, as of the Thing we cannot be without: No, no, our +Mothers ne're will consent to that, they love to groan and squall, tho +at the same time the Gallows eccho's to their Groans, and both together +labour for us. From the first we travel forth--to'thers our Journey's +End. _All this I know, yet I must forward_: To beg, my Birth will ne're +consent to; and _borrowing is quite out of date_--Yet starve I cannot, +_nor murder I wou'd not_: It must be the Highway then, the old Trade we +poor honest Rogues are forc'd too--This Place will serve for a Beginner +well enough--A Beginner did I say? Yes; for this is the very first day I +open Shop--Fortune, they say, uses to help the Bold, I hope she will be +kind to me. Ha! who have we here? A Gentlewoman well rigg'd, and only a +Servant with her, She may be a Prize worth the boarding, and faith I'll +venture hard but I'll carry her. + +[_He retires to a corner of the Stage._ + +_Enter_ Arabella _in great disorder, looking about her, with_ Symon _her +Servant._ + +_Arab._ This way, say'st thou _Symon_, with _Friendly_? + +_Sym._ Yes forsooth Mistress, with Mr. _Friendly_. + +_Arab._ Alas! I'm tired and cannot travel further; my Heart is full of +Fear, and yet I know not why, nor can I tell why he should use me +thus,--It is not common sure for Men to leave their Brides upon the +Wedding-day: And yet I cannot tell but it may be so! O wretched State of +Marriage, and of Love, if this be Love! Here will I lie me down, and +rest a while [_Lies down._] my wearied Limbs, unused to these sad +Frights and Fears--But prethee do thou run after him, and if it be +possible o'retake him too: Tell him the strange Disorder thou dost leave +me in; and let him know my Father's Anger, his Friends Concern, and what +is more, his _Arabella_'s sad Complaint; tell him, I grieve, I faint, I +die; tell him any thing that may stay him. + +_Sym._ Yes Forsooth. + +_Arab._ Intreat him to return; nay, urge him all thou canst to make him +come again: Nay haste, good _Symon_, fly if thou canst, for I can stir +no further. + +_Sym._ Well, well, Forsooth, I am gone. + +[_Exit_ Symon. + +_Arab._ Alas, how wretched and forlorn am I! + + _I she whom once so many did admire, + Whose Wit and Charms the coldest Hearts cou'd fire! + Now wretched Maid, and most unhappy Wife, + In Sighs and in Complaints must end my Life. + Abandoned by my Husband, e're enjoyed, + With thoughts of Pleasure, yet untasted, cloy'd. + He leaves me now to my sad Frights a Prey; + O, my dear_ Bonvile! _whither dost thou stray? + Unheard, alas! I make my amarous Moans; + The Winds and Waves refuse to bear my Groans: + Eccho her self can't suffer my Complaint, + But with repeated Sighs grows tir'd and faint. + Where to find him, good Heaven direct me! + For losing him, I more than lose my self._ + +[_Rises, and_ Exit. + +_Sum._ I must after her, she's worth my Acquaintance, and has good +Moveables about her I perceive, what e're the Ready is. The next Turning +has a most convenient Hollow for the Purpose, and there I'll make her +sure. Now Luck, or never. + +[_Exit after_ Arabella. + +_Reenter_ Arabella, _and_ Summerfield _after her._ + +_Ara._ I'm at a stand already, and know not where I am. + +_Sum._ I'll direct you, Madam; Well overtaken. + +_Ara._ Bless me, Sir; What are you? + +_Sum._ A Man. + +_Ara._ An honest Man, I hope? + +_Sum._ Yes faith in some Respects, I'm very honest, but not altogether +so; I were not fit to live in the World if I were too honest, Child. + +_Ara._ Alas! then I begin to fear: Pray tell me what you are? + +_Sum._ Why, faith, an honest Thief. + +_Ara._ How, honest, and yet a Thief? I never heard they were of Kin +before; Pray, Heaven, I find it now. + +_Sum._ Indeed! a very honest Thief. + +_Ara._ Well, Sir, since that's your Title, pray use me kindly: Nay, I'm +sure you will, there's something in your Looks which speaks you mild and +noble. + +_Sum._ Yes, I am a Gentleman, and you shall find me so; for I'll not +offer you the least shew of Violence, or offer to corrupt your Chastity; +tho indeed you are tempting Fair, and might inflame a colder Heart than +mine: Yet Ravishing's no part of my Profession as yet; or if it were, +you look so charming Innocent, you wou'd disarm my wildest Thoughts. + +_Ara._ Blessings on your Goodness! + +_Sum._ Are you a Maid, or Wife? + +_Ara._ I am both, Sir. + +_Sum._ Then this it seems is your Wedding-day, and these the Hours of +Interim that keep you in that double State? + +_Ara._ Indeed you are in the right. + +_Sum._ Come then, I'll be brief, and hinder not your desired _Hymen_. +You have some superfluous Toys I see about you, which you must deliver; +I mean, that Chain of Gold and Pearl about your Neck, and those pretty +Bracelets about your Arms, (pray, Heaven, they prove not Emblems of the +combined Hemp which is to halter mine); come, Madam, pray deliver 'em. + +_Ara._ Nay, I intreat you, Sir, to take 'em, for I cannot give 'em, they +are lock'd you see, and truly I have not the Key about me; it may be you +are furnish'd with Instruments that may unloose 'em, I pray do. + +_Sum._ No faith, Madam, I'm but a Beginner in this same Business, and am +wholly unprovided of any Pick-lock Tools besides this Sword. + +[_Draws his Sword._ + +_Ara._ O, good Sir, do not shew me that, 'tis too frightful; pray hurt +me not, for I do yield them freely: Use your Hands, perhaps their +strength will serve to tear 'em from me without more ado. Some Pain I'll +quietly endure, provide you do not hurt me much. + +_Sum._ Alas, dear Lady, I'll use you as gently as I can upon my Word; +but 'tis devilish strong.--If I hurt you, pray speak. + +[_He endeavours to break the Chain about her Neck._] + +_Ara._ Not much, Sir. + +_Sum._ I am glad on't,--S'death, I can't do it. + +[_She draws his Sword, and stands upon her Guard._ + +_Ara._ No Sir, nor shall not now: You a Highway-man and guard your self +no better: Come, Sir, what Money have you? Deliver quickly. + +_Sum._ Not a Cross by this foolish Hand of mine! + +_Ara._ How, no Money, 'twere pity then to take this from thee; Here, +take it again, I know you'l use me ne're the worse for what I have done. + +[_Gives him his Sword again._] + +_Sum._ No, by my Life! + +_Ara._ I do believe you; and now pray hear me--Here on my Knees, in +sight of Heaven, I make this solemn Protestation, That if you'l but +forbear the Rifling of this Chain and Bracelets, and go but with me +Home, by all the Vows which I this Day have plighted to my dearest +Husband, I will deliver you in Money the full Value of these I wear, +and cannot for my Life get off. + +_Sum._ Ha! Ready-money is the Prize I look for; it passes without +suspicion every where, when Chains and Jewels are often stop'd and +call'd for before the Magistrate: But---- + +_Ara._ Nay never doubt! You saw I gave you my Advantage up, and +questioned not my safety at your hands, pray fear not yours in mine. + +_Sum._ I know not what to do. + +_Ara._ Pray tell me, Sir, did you ever think a Woman true? + +_Sum._ I have heard of some, but very few. + +_Ara._ Will you add one more to your belief? + +_Sum._ I think I may, for they were fewer than the Articles of my Faith, +therefore I have room for you, and will believe you--Yet stay, you say +you'l ransom your jewels with Ready-money when you come Home; so you +may, and then discover me. + +_Ara._ Shall I repeat the Vows I made? + +_Sum._ No, for I'll trust you; and if you do betray me, then Mercy upon +me, and Farewel. I knew a Gentleman that had been a Courtier at +_Whitehall_ fifteen Years, and he was buried e're he took a Bride: 'Tis +very strange you'l say; and may be my Case in another way. + +_Ara._ Come, Sir, never fear: A Man and afraid; Fie, fie! + +_Sum._ Give me your Hand, I'll wait on you; and if you are (as I believe +you) True and Just, you are the World's Wonder! Come, Madam. + +[_Exeunt._ + + +SCENE II. + +_Enter two Boys, one with a Child in his Arms._ Compass _on the other +side._ + +_1 Boy._ _Jack_, Who's this? + +_2 Boy._ O _Jeminy_! I'll be hang'd if it ben't Goodman _Compass_, that +they said was dead three Years ago. + +_1 Boy._ Od's Life, and so it is! + +_Comp._ O _London_! sweet _London_! Do I live to see thee once again? My +Eyes are full of Brine for Joy. And if my dear _Peggy_ be but living +still, I shall cry 'em out. + +_1 Boy._ Goodman _Compass_, I am glad to see you; You are welcome home. + +_Comp._ Thank you, good Lad: Honest _Jack_ here too? Why, thou art grown +a little Man since I saw thee last: What, is that thy own, heh? + +_2 Boy._ I am fain to keep it, you see, whoever got it; it may be other +Mens Cases as well as mine. + +_Comp._ Thou say'st true _Jack_: But whose pretty Knave is it? + +_2 Boy._ My Dame's where I live. + +_Comp._ And not thy Master's? + +_2 Boy._ Nay, nay, I can't tell that neither: My Master loves it as well +as if it were his own, and for ought I see better than my Dame. + +_Comp._ A very good Lad by my Troth! + +_2 Boy._ But, Goodman _Compass_, I can tell you News, Your Wife has a +brave Boy too of her own, not above a Quarter old, as big as two of +this. + +_Comp._ Ha! say'st thou so, _Jack_? Ha, ha, ha, by my Troth I am +heartily glad to hear it: I'll give thee a dozen of Ale, and thy News be +true, Boy. + +_1 Boy._ I assure you 'tis very true: All your Neighbours can tell you +the same. + +_Comp._ Ha, ha, ha! But a Quarter old, and so lusty, say you? What +plaguy thundering Boys are got now-a-days: I Gad, I shall split my Sides +with Laughing; Ha, ha, ha.--But _Jack_, I have been loth to ask thee all +this while, for fear of ill News, how does my Wife? + +_2 Boy._ O never better, nor ever so lusty and handsome--And truly she +wears better Clothes than she was wont, especially on Holy-days: she has +Silk-Gowns, and Lac'd-Petticoats, and fine _Holland_-Smocks too, they +say, that have seen 'em: And some of our Neighbours say, they were taken +up in _Cheap_. + +_Comp._ Like enough, _Jack_; and there they must be paid for--Well, good +Lads, go and tell my Wife the joyful Tidings of my Return. + +_2 Boy._ That I will with all my Heart, for she heard you were dead long +ago. + +_1 Boy._ Nay, I'll go along with you _Jack_. + +_2 Boy._ Come then. + +[_Exeunt 2 Boys._ + +_Comp._ Well, _Peggy_, if I am one of the Livery, I thank thee for it: +The Cuckolds are the greatest Company in all the City: And we have more +Aldermen among us, than all the other put them together. + +_Enter_ Peg, Compass_'s Wife._ + +_Peg._ O my dear sweet Honey-suckle! Art thou alive? I am glad to see +thee with all my Heart and Soul, so I am. + +[_Runs and kisses him._] + +_Comp._ O, ho! good Spouse, give me leave to shed a few pearly Tears; +the Fountain of Love will have its Course: And tho I cannot Sing at +first sight, yet I can Cry you see. I am as it were new come into the +World; and Children Cry before they Laugh, a long time you know. + +_Peg._ Yes; and so thou art new born indeed to me, my _Numpy_; for I was +told you were dead long since, and never thought to see this dear sweet +Face of thine again: I heard thou wert div'd to the bottom of the Sea, +and that you never did intend to see poor _Peggy_ more. + +_Comp._ He, he, he, I was going down, as you say _Peg_, but I thought +better on't, and turn'd back: I heard an ill Report of my Neighbours +there; the devouring Sharks, and other Sea-Monsters, whose Company, to +tell you the Truth, I did not like; and therefore resolv'd to come home +and bide with thee my Girl--Come kiss thy poor Hubby, kiss me I say, for +Sorrow begins to ebb apace. + +_Peg._ A thousand, thousand Welcomes home dear _Numpy_! + +_Comp._ An Ocean of Thanks, kind _Peggy_: Well, and how goes all at +Home? What Lank still, poor _Peg_? Wil't ne're be full Sea at our Wharf? + +_Peg._ Alas, Husband, what do you mean? + +_Comp._ A Lass, is it, or a Lad, Wench? I shou'd be glad of both; I +look'd for a pair of Compasses long afore now. + +_Peg._ What, and you from home, Love? + +_Comp._ I from home? Why tho I was from home, and other of our +Neighbours from home, does that follow that every body else is from +home? + +_Peg._ I am pleased you are so merry, Husband. + +_Comp._ Merry, nay I'll be merrier yet; why shou'd I be sorry? I hope my +Boy's well, is he not? Od's fish, I look for another by this Time. + +_Peg._ Boy, what Boy, Deary? + +_Comp._ What Boy! why the Boy I got when I came home in the Cock-boat +one Night, about a Year ago; You have not forgotten it, I hope, I think +I left behind me for a Boy, and a Boy I look for. + + _Peg._ I find he knows all--What shall I do? [_Aside._] + O dear Husband, pray pardon me. [_Kneels._] + +_Comp._ Pardon thee; why I hope thou hast not made away with my Boy, +hast thou? Od's death I'll hang thee, if there were never a Whore more +in _London_, if thou hast. + +_Peg._ O no; but your long Absence, and the Rumour of your Death, +[_Cries._] made me think I might venture. + +_Comp._ Venture, quoth a, I can't blame thee, _Peg_; for _Wapping_, if +it were twice _Wapping_, can't hold out always, no more than _Redriff_, +_Limehouse_ or _Shadwel_, nay or the strongest Suburbs about _London_; +and when it comes to that, wo be to the City too, Girl. + +_Peg._ Consider, Husband, I'm but a Woman, neither the first or last +that have done the same, and truly I won't deny but I have a Child. + +_Comp._ Have you so? And what by Consequence must I have then, I pray? + +_Peg._ If you'l forgive me this Time, it shall be so no more, indeed and +indeed, now. + +_Comp._ Well, well. I will forgive thee, _Peg_, upon this Condition, +that you tell me who it was that fell foul aboard thee, and sprung this +Leak in thee. + +_Peg._ O dear Husband! + +_Comp._ Nay, no Excuses, for I must know. + +_Peg._ Why then truly it was Mr. _Venter_ the Merchant. + +_Comp._ I am beholding to him, and wou'd requite his Civility, if his +Wife were but as willing, tho he be one of our Merchants at Sea, he +shall give me leave to be Owner at home; and where is my Boy? what, +shan't I see him? + +_Peg._ Yes if you please, good Husband: He's nurs'd at _Bednal green_; +'tis now too late, to Morrow will be better. + +_Comp._ Come then we'l home and to bed. + + _Let other Fools repine at Scoffs and Scorns, + I'll teach the Cuckold how to hide his Horns._ + +[Exeunt. + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman, _Mr._ Venter, Spruce, _Mrs._ Venter _and_ +Clara. + +_Mer._ Was the like ever known, that a Bridegroom shou'd absent himself +on his Wedding-Day? + +Mr. _Ven._ 'Tis somewhat strange indeed. + +_Mer._ And the Bride too my Daughter, she's out of the way: Why what +shou'd be the meaning of all this, Od's bobs I can't tell? + +Mrs. _Ven._ Perhaps they'r busy Brother, privately conferring Notes +together: You can't tell but that the young Man may have a stomach to +his Supper, and fall too unawares, and we ne're the wiser. + +_Spr._ Od's nigs, very true; what wou'd you say then Sir, if they shou'd +be stol'n away, and a-bed together seriously? + +_Mer._ What wou'd I say? marry I wou'd say, Speed 'em well: And if no +worse News ever comes to me, I'll be hang'd if e're I cry'd for't. + +_Enter Nurse._ + +How now, what's the Business with you? + +_Nurse._ Business enough, Forsooth; for I have the strangest Tydings! + +_Mer._ Of any One that's lost, Woman? + +_Nurse._ No forsooth, of One that's found again, an't please you. + +_Mer._ O, he was lost then it seems. + +Mr. _Ven._ Her Business is with me, I believe Brother; is it not, Woman? + +_Nurse._ Yes, Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Come hither then, [_Nurse whispers Mr._ Venter.] How, +return'd? + +_Nurse._ Yes indeed, Sir, and all discovered. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ah Curse on the Wind that blew him ashore. + +_Nurse._ Aye, so say I Sir, and did not sink him when he was going. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, well, be sure you do not let him come near the Child. + +_Nurse._ I warrant you, Sir, if you charge me to the contrary. + +Mr. _Ven._ Yes, I do strictly charge you as you tender my Displeasure. + +_Nurse._ Well then let me alone--Besides, Sir, he intends to come to +morrow morning with his Wife and see him. + +Mr. _Ven._ I'll meet him there; and if he chance to be there before me, +be sure to keep the Child safe, and not let him touch it. + +_Nurse._ I warrant you, let me alone. + +[_Exit Nurse._ + +_Enter_ Summerfield _and_ Arabella. + +_Mer._ So, so, Heaven be praised, they are not both lost I see, here's +the Bride, my Daughter, come again. + +_Ara._ Father, and Gentlemen, I desire ye to treat this Stranger here +with all Respect and Generosity; He's a loving Kinsman of my _Bonvile_'s +who kindly came to congratulate our Wedding. + +_Mer._ Sir, you are heartily welcome. Od's bobs you are. + +Mr. _Ven._ Welcome to all of us. + +_Spruce._ Seriously, Sir, and so you are. + +_Mer._ But where's the Bridegroom, Girl? Od's bobs we're all at a +Nonplus here, at a stand, quite out; the Musicks ceas'd, and we all look +as tho there were neither a light Heart or Heel among us; nay, my Cousin +_Clara_ too as cloudy as on a washing Day. + +_Clara._ 'Tis then because you will not dance with me, Sir. + +_Ara._ 'Tis I alone have cause to be sad, if this Day's Happiness cou'd +admit of any; But I've long reason'd with my pressing Thoughts, and from +them drawn some Symptoms of Relief. Suppose this Day hath long since +appointed by my dear _Bonvile_, to meet some Foe, and right his injur'd +Reputation: Nay, say he fights, alas! Why shou'd I fear, when all the +Powers above, that guard true Love and Innocence, will never see him +fall. + +_Mer._ Prethee peace, good Girl hold thy tongue; Od's bobs thou'lt make +us all Cowards, to hear a Woman preach up Valour thus. + +_Ara._ Well, Sir, I have done: But pray entertain this Gentleman kindly +for my sake. Indeed I was afraid when I saw him first. + +_Sum._ Ha! what does she say? Od's Death she'l tell! + +_Ara._ Being in search of my dear _Bonvile_, I had quite lost my Way +when he most opportunely came unto my Aid, and gave me many marks of his +Esteem in my distress of Fears; nay more than this, which I'll declare +at large. + +_Sum._ Death and Hell, she'l betray me. + +_Ara._ Well, Gentlemen, since the Bridegroom's absent, I must supply his +Place: Come, when I have waited on you to your Pleasure, I will return +[_To_ Summerfield.] to you, Sir, we must discourse more of my _Bonvile_ +yet. + +[_Exeunt all but_ Summerfield.] + +_Manet_ Summerfield _solus._ + +_Sum._ What a trembling Trade's this, when Conscience, that shou'd be +our only Guide, flies and leaves us to our accusing Guilt. A Thief! the +very Name and Thought chills my Blood, and makes me tremble like an +Ague-fit. A Dog, nay every Bough that moves, puts us in fear of present +Apprehension. Sure I shall never thrive on this Trade: Perhaps I need +take no further Care, I may be now near to my Journey's End, or at least +in a fair way to _Newgate_, and from thence to _Tyburn_, the only Place +that we poor Rogues can claim for an Inheritance. Trust a Woman, and +with a Matter of such Importance, what a simple Dog am I? I cou'd find +in my Heart to run away: And that were base to run from a woman; I can +lay claim to nothing but her Vows, and those the Women seldom or never +mind. + +_Enter_ Arabella. + +_Ara._ So, Sir, now you shall find a Woman as good as her Promise; Here +are 20 Pieces, the full Value, on my Life, of what they cost. + +_Sum._ Pray, Madam, do not thus suspend my doubtful Soul; but if you do +design to insnare my Life, speak, speak freely: Or if the Constable be +at the Door, let him shew his Staff of Authority, perhaps I may corrupt +him with a Bribe. + +_Ara._ How! base ungrateful Man, do you suspect my Faith? Nay then, +Father, Uncle, and Gentlemen, where are you? + +_Enter all as before._ + +_Mer._ How now, how now! What's the matter, Girl? + +_Ara._ For shame, will you not entertain your Kinsman here a little +better: you leave him here alone, as tho you despised his Company. + +_Mer._ Is that all? I thought the Bridegroom had been return'd: Sir, +pray pardon this Rudeness; But indeed I had quite forgot you, quite +forgot you, as I hope to be sav'd: But what makes you tremble, Sir, are +you ill dispos'd. + +_Ara._ Think you he hath not reason to be ill-disposed at this cold +[_Aside to Justice_ Merryman.] Entertainment? for my part I blush for +shame. + +_Spr._ Come pray, Sir, shake off this Dulness, and participate of our +Mirth, Od's nigs do. + +_Sum._ I am very well, Sir, I thank you, only the Gentleman is a little +under a Mistake. + +_Mer._ It may be so, Ay, ay, it may be so; I vow I thought you had +trembled, but I believe it might be my own Hand; you must pardon me, I +was stiffer once. + +_Sum._ Sir, your humble Servant. + +_Mer._ But, Gentlemen, what think you of an Adventure? + +_Spr._ Adventure whither? + +_Mer._ Why, to the _East-Indies_? I have a Vessel, Gentlemen, called the +_Sea-Horse_, bound thither, and to morrow I do expect her to sail. Now, +Gentlemen, if you'l venture, ye shall have fair Dealing, that I'll +promise you. And for the French, you need not fear them, for she is a +smart new Vessel: Nay, she hath a Letter of Mart too, and twenty brave +roaring Boys on both Sides her, Starboard and Larboard: And I intend to +go as far as _Marget_ down with her, 'twill be as good as Physick to me. + +_Spr._ A very good Motion, Sir, I begin, there's my ten Pieces. + +_Sum._ And, Sir, if a proffer'd Love may be accepted, be pleased to take +my ten Pieces with you. + +_Mer._ Your's above all the rest, Sir. + +_Ara._ That's kindly said, Sir, and I thank you: Now pray venture Ten +more for my sake. + +_Sum._ Alas, Madam, it's a younger Brother's Portion. + +_Ara._ At my Request, Sir, venture the other Ten; if you want, I'll +supply you with as many more. + +_Sum._ With all my Heart then: Come, Sir, if you please, I'll double +mine: So now she's got her Gold again, and I am now no Thief, (_aside_) +Sir, I have a Suit to you, + +[_To_ Merryman. + +_Mer._ You may command it, for I am always at your Service: But pray +your Pleasure? + +_Sum._ My Request, Sir, is, to have the Honour of keeping you Company to +Sea, for I have a great desire to see _Marget_. + +_Mer._ Sir, I shall be very happy in your good Company. + +_Ara._ I hope you will be both better acquainted e're you return; and by +that time your Kinsman may be here to make you more welcome. + + _And for the Gold at my Request you lent, + I'll double it to give you more content._ + + Sum. _Why shou'd I fear, since she is prov'd so just? + I'll quit my Trade: Now_ Jack Catch _do thy worst._ + +_Exeunt._ + +_The End of the Second ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Third. + +_A Wood_ + + +_Enter_ Bonvile _and_ Friendly. + +_Bon._ Come my brave _Friendly_, I think we are here the first: Your +Enemy is not yet i'th Field; let's walk a Turn or two, perhaps by that +time he may arrive. + +_Fri._ I'm very confident that he's here already. + +_Bon._ Thy Looks, me-thinks, speak Conquest sure thy own; an ardent Rage +has kindled both thy Cheeks. + +_Fri._ Like a red Morning, Friend; which still foretels a stormy Day to +follow--And now I well observe your Face, me-thinks it waxes pale, +there's Death in it already. + +_Bon._ How, _Friendly_, do you then take me for a Coward? My Face look +pale, and Death in it already? By Heav'n, shou'd any but my _Friendly_ +dare to tell me what thou hast said, my Sword shou'd ram the base +Affront down the curst Villain's Throat. But you are my Friend, and I +must only chide your Error. But prethee tell me who is it you are to +fight with, for as yet I am ignorant both of the Cause and Person. + +_Fri._ Ha, his Name! Did you enquire his Name? + +_Bon._ Yes. + +_Fri._ I dare not yet reveal it for fear of---- + +_Bon._ For fear of what? + +_Fri._ O Confusion! I know not what to say! + +_Bon._ How, afraid to tell his Name? Then I begin to doubt the Justice +of your Quarrel. + +_Fri._ Too well you may, for by yon' setting Sun, that Globe of heavenly +Light I swear, I come to kill the only Man that strives to save my +Life--Man did I say? Nay more than common Man, for those the World +abound with; but such a Man besides, all this vast Land affords not. + +_Bon._ By this your large Encomium of your Friend, I'm afraid 'twas Wine +first made your Quarrel, and thereupon this Challenge did ensue. + +_Fri._ O no! I call the Powers above to witness, that in all the Course +of our unhappy Friendship, I to my knowledg never did receive the least +Affront or Injury from him. + +_Bon._ How came this Challenge then? + +_Fri._ O dear Friend, the noblest that Man cou'd ever boast of: +[_embraces him_] When first my rigid Fate threw on me this Command to +fight, I had recourse to many whom I always thought my Friends; but when +the Touchstone of my Danger try'd 'em, I found 'em like the cursed Fruit +of _Sodom_, fair without, but rotten at the Heart: But then I found out +_Bonvile_, my only dearest Friend. _Bonvile_ no sooner heard of my +Engagement, but flew unto my Succour with as much Bravery, as a great +General hastned by Alarms, marches to meet the Foe: You left your +Nuptial Bed perhaps to meet your Death. O unheard-of Friendship! My +Father gave me Life, 'tis true; but you, my Friend, support my Honour. +All this for me, while I, ungrateful Man, thus seek your Life: For to my +eternal Horror be it spoke, you are the Man whom I come here to kill. + +_Bon._ Ha! + +_Fri._ Too true alas! there read the Warrant for your Death. + +[_Gives him the Letter._] + +_Bon._ 'Tis a Woman's Hand. + +_Fri._ Yes, and a bad One too, they all speak fair, write foul, but mean +worse. + +_Bon._ How! kill me? Sure, I dream, and this is all Delusion, or else +thou dost it only to try thy Friend. + +_Fri._ O, from my Soul, I wish it were no more. But read, read on, see +how I'm fetter'd in a _Circe's_ Charms--I love beyond Imagination, love +even to Madness, and must as madly do a Deed will damn me to the hottest +Flames of Hell. + +_Bon._ And woo't thou kill thy Friend for such a Woman? + +_Fri._ Alas! I must, you see I am commanded, commanded too by Love; Love +more powerful than all the Sacred Ties of Friendship, therefore draw, +and guard thy self. [_Draws._ + +_Bon._ Not I by Heaven! What wou'dst thou have me draw and kill my +Friend? + +_Fri._ There thou stab'st my Soul. O where, where is now my Resolution +fled? A fatal Blast has struck me; a sudden Horror shot me thro the +Heart; a Trembling seiz'd my Knees, that I can hardly stand, and all my +Vital Powers methinks seem dead; yet Love's the Fire must kindle all +again, therefore I charge thee draw, or naked as thou art, I will assail +thee. + +_Bon._ I am defended against all that thou canst do, in having Justice +on my Side, and Friendship too to back it. + + _But since Humanity now bears so sway, + To this unguarded Breast come make your way._ + +Strike home be sure. + +[_Opens his Bosom._ + +_Fri._ That were a barbarous Murder. + +_Bon._ How can the Effect prove different from the Cause? Or how can any +thing but damn'd Barbarity ensue a Woman's much more damn'd Design? Who +wou'd expect Reason from one that raves, or hope for Mercy in a Tyger's +Den? Believe me, _Friendly_, all this may sooner be; Mercy may sooner +dwell among the Savage Wolves and Bears, than in a Woman's Breast. + +_Fri._ O, my too rigid Fate, to place me thus on such a dangerous +Precipice, that wheresoe're I turn my self for help, I see my Ruin still +before mine Eyes. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Bon._ [_Pausing._] Stay--The Command which thy _Medea_ sent thee, was +to kill thy only dearest Friend, was it not? + +_Fri._ Alas! it was. + +_Bon._ Then here, all Friendship dies between us; thus hast thou kill'd +thy Friend, and satisfied that infernal Hag, thy cursed Mistress, who +thus commanded thee: Away, I say, begon, and never see me more. + +_Fri._ Ha! + +_Bon._ Yes, base ungrateful Wretch, farewel, (_Offers to go_) --Yet +stay, and since that Sacred Tie of Friendship's broke, know thou, most +vile of Men, that _Bonvile_'s now thy Enemy; therefore do thou draw and +guard thy spotted Life. + +_Fri._ How, Friend! + +_Bon._ Friend didst thou call me? On forfeit of thy Life that word no +more; the very Name of Friend from thee, shall be a Quarrel: How can I +tell but that thou lovest my Wife, and therefore feign'd this damn'd +Design to draw me from her Arms? + +_Fri._ How! wrong thy Wife? O no, I never had a Thought so vile! Yet you +must forgive me, indeed you must, by all that once was dear to me; and +what I dare not mention more, by Love and Honour, I implore thy +Pardon--Still art thou deaf to my Complaints?--Nay, then upon my Knee, I +will enforce thy Pity. Behold me, _Bonvile_, prostrate at thy Feet, +crawling for Mercy, swimming in Tears, and almost drown'd with Shame; +extend thy Arm to help me, as thou'rt a Man, be God-like in thy Nature, +and raise me from the Grave; turn thy Eyes on me, and sink me not with +Frowns; O save me, save me, or I fall for ever. + +_Bon._ As soon shall Heav'n reverse the Fate of Hell, as I recal what I +have said, or plant thee in my Breast again. + +_Fri._ Nay, then I am lost to thee, and all the World besides. + +[_Rises._ + +_Bon._ Thou are indeed for ever lost to me; see what a miserable Wretch +thy Folly now has made thee: A Creature so far below my Pity, that I +despise and scorn thy base Submission, and will never hear thee more, +more. + +_Fri._ Say but thou hast forgiven me, and I will ask no more. + +_Bon._ I never will. + +_Fri._ O cruel _Bonvile_! + +_Bon._ More barbarous _Friendly_: Hold off, or I will use thee like a +Dog, tread thee to Earth, and spurn thee like a Slave, base as thou art. + +_Fri._ Still thou art my Friend---- + +_Bon._ Thou ly'st, I have abjured the Name. + +_Fri._ Let me but go with thee. + +_Bon._ Not for the World; I'de rather venture my self with Crocodiles, +catch the last dying Gasps of some poor Wretch infested with the Plague, +than trust my self with thee. + + _Farewel, I leave thee with the greatest Curse, + Condemn'd to Woman, Hell affords no worse._ + +[_Exit, breaking from him._ + +Friendly solus, _rising in a Passion._ + +_Fri._ Death and Destruction, am I thus despised! Condemned to Woman's +Lust, and scorn'd by Man. By _Bonvile_ too, after imploring, like a +School-Boy, at his Feet--My Blood boils high, and scalds my very Heart! +My inward Grief calls on me for Revenge, and I am all on fire! O that I +had the proud _Bonvile_ here now at my Feet, I'de use him worse than he +did me before. + + _But since that open Force yields no Relief, + Private Revenge shall ease my swelling Grief. + With Thoughts of Jealousy I'll fill his Soul, + Which shall its Powers of all their Rest controul. + Thus for a Woman I've begun a War, + And for her sake must damn my Soul like her._[Exit. + + +SCENE the Second. + +_Enter_ Nurse, Compass, _and his Wife._ + +_Nurse._ Indeed you must pardon me, I can't let ye see the Child; to +tell you the Truth, I am commanded to the contrary. + +_Comp._ Commanded! Prethee who commanded thee? + +_Nurse._ The Father. + +_Comp._ The Father, Why who am I? + +_Nurse._ Not the Father sure, the Civil Law has found it otherwise. + +_Comp._ The Civil Law found it otherwise! Why then the Uncivil Law shall +make it mine again, I'll be as dreadful as a _Shrove-Tuesday_ to thee; +for I'll besiege thy squalling catterwauling Castle, with my Friends the +Mob, and gut thy stinking Nursery, but I'll both see and have my Child. + +_Nurse._ Harkee, Goodman Swabber, say but half so much again, and I'll +call the Constable, and lay Burglary to your Charge. You wou'd not be so +hot if the Enemy were in View, nor if you had to do with any body but a +poor innocent Woman, so you wou'd'nt. + +_Peg._ Good Husband be patient, and let me alone with her: Come, come, +good Nurse, let him see the Boy. + +_Nurse._ Indeed I dare not Goody _Compass_: The Father first you know +delivered me the Child, and order'd me to let no body see it. He pays me +well and weekly for my Pains, and therefore I'll do as be bad me, so I +will. + +_Comp._ Why thou white Bastard-breeder; Is not this Woman here the +Mother? + +_Nurse._ Yes, I grant you that. + +_Comp._ Do you so? Well, and I grant it too; And is not the Child then +my own by the Wives Copy-hold? + +_Nurse._ The Law must try that. + +_Comp._ The Law! What then you think I'll be but its Father-in-Law? I +tell thee, all the Wit and Law twixt _Cuckolds-Point_ and +_Westminster-Hall_, shan't keep my own dear Flesh and Blood from me, I +warrant you that. No an't does, I'll be hanged at the Main-yard: Why, +who, dost think, uses to get my Children but my self? + +_Nurse._ Nay, I can't tell; you must look to that, for my part I ne're +knew you get any. + +_Comp._ Say'st thou so? Why, look you, do but put on a clean Smock, and +try me, if thou darst, I'll hold thee three to one I get thee with Child +before I leave thee: Heh! what say'st thou? + +[_Offers to lay hold on her._. + +_Nurse._ I'll see you hang'd first--Nay, pray be quiet, and don't offer +to spoil my Milk. Lord, you are as boisterous as my Husband was the +first Night we were married: Pray, Goody _Compass_, take off your Cur, +or else he'l bite me. + +_Peg._ No never fear him, Nurse, he's not so furious I assure ye. + +_Enter Mr._ Venter _and his Wife._ + +_Nurse._ O! here's my Master, the Child's Father, now talk with him. + +Mr. _Ven._ Good morrow Neighbour, good morrow to ye both. + +_Comp._ Both! Good morrow to you and your Wife too, if you go to that. + +Mr. _Ven._ I wou'd speak calmly with you, Friend, if you think fit. + +_Comp._ I know what belongs to Calm, and a Storm too; and if you please, +a cold word or two wi' you. + +Mr. _Ven._ With all my Heart. + +_Comp._ I understand that you have ty'd your Mare in my Ground. + +Mr. _Ven._ My Mare, Friend, nay I assure you, 'twas only my Nag. + +_Comp._ Your Nag? Well your Nag then let it be: Harke, Sir, to be short, +I'll cut off your Nag's Tail, if e're I catch him there again. + +Mr. _Ven._ Pray hear me, you are too rough to maintain---- + +_Comp._ I say, Sir, you shall maintain no Child of mine; my Wife does +not bestow her Labour for that purpose. + +Mr. _Ven._ You are too passionate--I will not maintain---- + +_Comp._ No marry shall you not. + +Mr. _Ven._ The Deed I have done to be lawful, I have repented it, and +given Satisfaction to the Law, my Purse has paid for't; therefore I +wou'd treat milder with you if you'd be pleased. + +_Comp._ Yes, yes, I am very well pleased, and shall be better pleased if +you can serve me so still: For, look you Sir, one of these Days I shall +to Sea again, you know where my Wife lives; yet you'l but lose your +labour, for get as many Children as you can, I assure you, you shall +keep none of them. + +Mr. _Ven._ I think you are mad. + +_Comp._ Why, if I am Horn-mad, what's that to you? + +Mr. _Ven._ Nay then, since you are so rough, I tell you plainly you +are--a---- + +_Comp._ A what? What am I, heh? + +Mr. _Ven._ A Coxcomb. + +_Comp._ A Coxcomb! a Cuckold you mean, and you a Fool for your pains. + +Mr. _Ven._ The Child is mine, I am the Father of it, and will keep it. + +_Comp._ Yes if you can, I know you will. But pray tell me, is not my +Wife the Mother? You may be as far from being the Father as I am, for my +Wife's acquainted with more Whore-masters besides your self; ay, and as +crafty Merchants too, let me tell you that. + +_Peg._ No indeed Husband, I had to do with no body else, 'twas he begot, +indeed and indeed now. Yet for all that, the Child's mine, I bred it and +bore it, and I'll have it and keep it, so I will. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Pray hold there Mrs. Jill-flurt, the Child's my Husband's, +and he shall have it, or I'll tear your Eyes out, ye Whore you. + +_Comp._ Good Words, Mistress; d'ye hear, give good Words you'd best, or +I shall tell you your own. + +Mr. _Ven._ I'll have no more to say to ye, the Law shall determine it; +in the mean time Nurse keep the Child for me, there, there's Money for +thee. + +[_Gives her Money. + +_Comp._ There's Money for me too, keep it for me, Nurse; give him both +thy Duggs at once, I pay thee for the right one, Girl. + +_Nurse._ I have two Hands, you see Gentlemen; this does but show ye how +the Law will hamper ye; even thus you'l be used, Gentlemen, if you go to +Law. + +Mr. _Ven._ It can't be helpt, for I won't lose my Right. + +_Comp._ Nor I mine for all you're a Merchant. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Nor I mine for all I did not bear it. + +_Peg._ Nor I, tho but a poor Sailer's Wife. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, fare ye well, we shall meet in another Place--Come +_Winny_. + +[_Exit_ Venter _and his Wife._ + +_Comp._ Ay, ay, I'll meet you when and where you dare, and do your +worst, I fear you not: By the Lord _Harry_ the World's come to a fine +Pass, that we must go to Law for our Children. No wonder the Lawyers are +all so rich, yet e're the Law shall have a Limb, a Leg, a Joint or Nail +of this same Boy, + + _'T shall cost me more than a whole Child in getting, + Some win by play, and standers by with Betting._ + +[Exeunt. + + +SCENE the Third. + +_Enter_ Spruce, Arabella _with a Letter in her Hand_, Clara, _Mr._ +Venter, _and Mrs._ Venter. + +Mr. _Ven._ From whence came that Letter, Niece? + +_Ara._ From _Putney_, Sir, and from my Husband. + +Mr. _Ven._ And pray be free; Does he tell ye the Cause of his leaving +you so abruptly on his Wedding-day? + +_Ara._ Yes; Sir, yet this had been sufficient to have let me known what +he is gone about, without the formal Addition of an Epistle. + +_Spruce._ That, why what is that I pray Madam? + +_Ara._ His Will, Sir, wherein he makes me his sole Executrix. + +_Spr._ Will! why what the Devil does he mean, seriously I can't find it +out? + +_Ara._ Why, Sir, he's gone to fight. + +_Spr._ How fight, Madam! On my Soul then I believe _Friendly_'s Second. + +_Ara._ You're in the right, he is so, and I am lost for ever! + +_Cla._ O foolish _Friendly_, this thy Mistake has made me the most +wretched of Woman-kind! Such variety of Thoughts load my afflicted +Breast, that I know not what to think: I rave, am mad, not knowing what +my Folly may produce; I fear for both, for both my Heart does bleed. + +_Ara_. Miserable Maid! nay, miserable Wife! but much more miserable +Widow! O my dear _Bonvile_! + +_Spr._ Duce take me, if e're I saw a Company so Phlegmatick in all my +Life: Mr. _Venter_, prethee let's have a Song, to pass away the Time, +and put Life into the Bride. + +Mr. _Ven._ With all my Heart, Mr. _Spruce_: Here, who waits?--Call in +the Musick, and desire 'em to oblige the Ladies with a new Song. + +[_Servant Enter and Exit._ ] + +_Cla._ Your self, Sir, you mean? + +_Spr._ Nay all of us I protest. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ay, ay, all of us. + +_Enter Musick and others who sing._ + +A Dialogue set by _Seignior Baptist_. + + Man. _A Woman's Love_ Woman. _And Man's is such,_ + Man. _Still too little,_ Wom. _Or else too much._ + Wom. _Men are Extreams,_ Man. _And Women too,_ + Wom. _All, all are false,_ Man. _All, All like you._ + Wom. _You'll swear and lie,_ Man. _If you'l believe,_ + Wom. _And sigh and die,_ Man. _Yet still deceive._ + Wom. _Your Vows and Oaths_ Man. _Your Smiles and Tears,_ + Wom. _Are all but Baits,_ Man. _Are all but Snares._ + Wom. _To win a Heart,_ Man. _And then destroy,_ + Wom. _The easy Fool,_ Man. _The promis'd Joy._ + +Another Strain. + + Wom. _I'le have you offer no more your Pretending,_ + Man. _Nor will I suffer your modish Dissembling:_ + Wom. _For Honour commands,_ + Man. _And Freedom withstands,_ + Wom. _What you?_ + Man. _And you._ + Wom. _I know wou'd have me be, your Slave,_ + Man. _I know wou'd have me be, your Slave._ + Wom. _O, no, no, no!_ + Man. _No, no, no, no!_ + Wom. _I never will agree,_ + Man. _I ever will be free._ + +_After the Song enter Justice_ Merryman, Summerfield, _and three or four +Sailers._ + +_Mer._ Daughter, Daughter! Where's my Daughter? I say, Where's my +Daughter? O Girl, I have the best News to tell you---- + +_Ara._ What of my Husband, Sir? + +_Mer._ No, no, of your Cousin, Girl, of your Cousin. + +_Ara._ What of him, Sir? + +_Mer._ Such a Cousin, Girl, such a dear Cousin he is, as _Alexander the +Great_, if he were alive, might be proud and boast of. + +_Ara._ You're welcome here again, Sir; You've made but a short Voyage, +pray what occasion'd your Return so speedily? + +_Sum._ Madam, I render you ten thousand Thanks; Your Generosity and +Goodness has wholly made me yours; I am the humblest of your faithful +Admirers. + +_Ara._ Forbear such lavish Gratitude; You'r too profuse in your +Acknowledgment of your small Favours. But pray be brief, and let me know +the happy Occasion of this your sudden Return, I long methinks to hear +it. + +_Sum._ Madam, you may command me--Not to molest the Company with the +Recital of every vain and needless Circumstance; 'twas briefly thus. +Scarce had we passed by _Marget_ on our Course, when on a sudden, from +the Top-mast head, a Sailer cries, All hands Aloft, three Sails ahead: +With that we rumidg and clear our Deck, our Gun-room arm'd, and all +things now are ready for a Fight. The Ships before descried, with +warlike Stems cut the resisting Waves, whilst from their Pendants +fluttering in the Air, we found they were three _Dunkirk_ Privateers; +they having made our English Cross advanced, salute us with a +Broad-side, to make us strike and yield: But we, who ne're knew as yet +what 'twas so cowardly to yield, and not regarding their unequal Odds, +fell boldly on, returning Fire for Fire. The Engagement then grew +desperate, for they on either Side fired in amain, whilst we withstood +their Force. At length they boldly grappled, and laid us close aboard, +and we as bravely beat them off again. + +_Mer._ But now, Daughter, mark what follows, for that's worth all, +I'faith it is; therefore go on, dear Cuz, go on. + +_Sum._ Sea-room at length we got; when (as Fate wou'd have it) an +unlucky Shot struck both the Captain and Lieutenant dead. Then we began +to fear, and all our noble Hearts were trembling with despair. + +_Mer._ No, no, not all Daughter--But you shall hear more--Ods bobs you +shall. + +_Sum._ How cou'd it be otherwise, when both our Commanders now were +lost? therefore to strike was all the Talk---- + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, now Daughter, now comes the Play, the other was only the +Prologue. + +_Sum._ But Fortune favouring, and the Wind springing a fresh Gale, we +got clear off and try'd to make a running Fight. + +_Mer._ Ay, but Cuz, how did we do all this? by whose Order and +Direction? + +_Sum._ Pardon me, Sir, 'twas of so small Moment, that already it has +slipt my treacherous Memory. + +_Mer._ Oh, ho! has it so! Ha, ha, ha! But it has not mine, I thank you, +no marry has it not, as you shall hear--Then he, with an undaunted +Spirit, started up amongst the Sailers, and---- + +_Sum._ Nay pray Sir---- + +_Mer._ By the Foot of _Pharaoh_ I'll not be balkt; he, I say, with an +Heroick Voice cried out, Courage brave boys, Charge and Discharge amain; +come I'll supply your fall'n Captain's place. At this blest News they +all fell on again, with ten thousand times more Fury than before: +Victory, Victory, was all their cry, whilst he my Cousin here, whom I +shall ne're forget, for by the Lord, methinks, I see him in the Fight +this very Instant, now running this way, now running that way, now down +to the Gun-room to encourage those that fought there; now upon the Deck +again, still crying out, Fear not, brave Boys, the Day will soon be +our's. + +_Sum._ O pray, Sir, let me intreat you to forbear, you make me ashamed, +I protest, to hear you. + +_Mer._ Ashamed, say you? Ha, ha, ha! + +_Ara._ Good Sir, go on. + +_Mer._ I will, I will--At length the proud French swallowing too many of +our English Balls, two of 'em very fairly cried, Your Servants +Gentlemen, farewel, and down they went. The other having lost most of +her Men, resolved to leave us; but we being too nimble, overtook her, +clapt some Men aboard, and brought her in a Prize: And this my brave Man +of War here, was the first that boarded her with Sword in Hand. + +_1 Sailer._ Of all this I was an Eye-witness. + +_2 Sailer._ And so was I. + +_3 Sailer._ And I, and all of us. + +_Mer._ Yes, and many more stout Boys besides. + +_Spruce._ Sir, we are all indebted to your Valour; such Voyages as +these, from small Venturers, in time may make us great Merchants. + +_Mer._ Well, never was Fight better managed before, that's certain. + +_1 Sail._ No, never, never! + +_2 Sail._ Better, say you? No nor half so well. + +_3 Sail._ If it were in our Power, we'd make him Admiral, so we wou'd. + +_Sum._ Gentlemen, 'tis to your Valours all, that I am indebted for the +Honour I have gain'd: And that I may not seem wholly ungrateful, there, +there's something in token of my Thankfulness. + +[_Gives 'em Money._ + +_1, 2, 3 Sailers._ Heaven bless your Worship. + +_Ara._ Come Cousin, we'l withdraw into the Parlour: And if these honest +Friends will be pleased to drink what our House affords, they shall be +welcome. + +_1 Sail._ Thank you Mistress with all our Hearts. + +[Exeunt _all but Sailers_. + +_2 Sail._ Well, this Mr. _Summerfield_ is a brave Fellow, Gadzooks he +is. + +_3 Sail._ Ay _Tom_ so he is; had it not been for him, we had all been +taken on my Conscience. + +_1 Sail._ On my Soul and so we had: O if you had but seen him when he +boarded the _Monsieur_, 'twou'd have made you laugh 'till you had split +your Sides. He came up to the Captain o'this fashion with a Slap--ha! +and gave him such a back-handed wipe, that he cut off his Head as +genteely, as tho he had served seven Years Apprenticeship to't. + +_Enter Servant with a Bowl of Punch._ + +_Serv._ Gentlemen, Mr. _Summerfield_ desires ye to be merry, and has +sent you this to drink his Health. + +_1 Sail._ O, the Lord bless him, he's a fine Gentleman, and so pray tell +him, and withal give him our hearty Thanks; Dost hear Boy? + +_Serv._ Yes, yes, I will. + +[_Exit._ + +_2 Sail._ What is't Brother? + +_3 Sail._ Punch by this Light! + +Omnes. _Hoo-ra; Hoo-ra; Viva_ Mr. _Summerfield, Viva, Hoora._ + +[The first Sailer takes the Bowl of Punch, walks in state round the +Stage, and sings; the others all follow.] + + _Here's a Health to jolly_ Bacchus, + _Here's a Health to jolly_ Bacchus, + _Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho._ + _For he will merry make us,_ + _For he will merry make us,_ + _Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho._ + _Then sit ye down together,_ + _Then sit ye down together._ + +[_They all sit down with the Bowl in the middle._ + +_2 Sail._ Pshaw! Pox o'th' this old Song, prithee let's have a Dance. + +_3 Sail._ With all my Heart; strike up Musick. + +_The Sailers and their Wives dance._ + +After the Dance. + + 1 Sail. _So, well done my Lads, now let's aboard amain,_ + _And suck our Faces o're and o're again._ + _Brandy we've got enough, by this blest Chance,_ + _We'l nothing drink but Punch, when we get_ France. + +_Omn._ Hoora! Hoora! Exeunt omnes. + +_The End of the Third ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Fourth. + +_A Tavern._ + +[2 Tables, three Chairs to each.] + + +_Enter_ Compasse, Peg, _and_ Pettifog. + +_A Drawer Meets them._ + +_Drawer._ Welcome Gentlemen. Please to walk into a Room? + +_Compasse:_ Aye Boy. Come Mr. _Pettifog_, please you sit. + +_Pettifog:_ With all my Heart; Come Mistress. + +_Draw._ What Wine will you be pleased to drink, Gentlemen? + +_Pett._ Ask the good Woman: speak Mistress. + +_Com._ Canary for her; I know what relishes her Palat best. A Quart of +brisk Canary, Boy. + +_Draw._ Ye shall have the best in _England_.--Coming, Coming, Sir. + +[_Exit._. + +_Com._ What call you this same Tavern, Mr. Attorney? + +_Pett._ The King's Head, Sir. + +_Com._ The King's Head: Marry, it has a good Neighbour of _Guild-hall_. +It takes many a fair Pound upon that 'n Account, I warrant you. + +_Draw._ (within) A Quart of Canary in the King's-head, score. + +_Enter Drawer, fills a Glass, and gives it_ Compasse. + +_Draw._ Sir, Here's a Glass of the richest Canary that ever came over, +the very Quintessence of the Grape I assure you. + +_Com._ Say'st thou so? Why then there's a Tester for thee, and so leave +us--. Come, Mr. _Pettifog_, [_Exit Drawer_] and 't please you my Service +to you. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Pett._ I thank you kindly, Sir.--Mrs. my Service to you, your Husband's +good Health. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Peg._ With all my Heart indeed, Here my dear black ey'd Rogue, thy +n'own good Health. + +[_Drinks._ + +_Com._ Thank you _Peg_, thank you, so now let's mind our Business. + +_Enter Mr._ Ventere, _his Wife, and_ Dodge, _to another Table in the +same Room._ + +Mr. _Ven._ Show a Room, Drawer. + +_Draw._ Here Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Ne're a private Room? + +_Draw._ No Sir, the House is full. + +_Com._ Ods fish, whom have we here, my Wife's Merchant, with his Lawyer? + + +_Pett._ Ye know we promised to give him a Meeting here. + +_Comp._ 'Tis true we did so,--but come to the Business in hand. + +[_Pettifog_ and _Compasse_ talk privately. + +Mr. _Ven._ Well, bring us a Bottle of your best Red. + +_Draw._ You shall have it, Sir. + +[_Exit_ Drawer. + +Mr. _Ven._ And what do you think of my Cause, Mr. _Dodge_? + +_Dodge._ O we shall carry it most certainly: You have Money to go +through with the Business; and ne're fear but we'll trounce them +swingingly. + +Mr. _Ven._ I warrant you think it very strange, Mr. _Dodge_, that I am +at this Charge and Expence to bring a farther Charge upon me. + +_Dodge._ Not I, I assure you, Sir, for I know you are a wise Man, and +know very well what you do; besides you have Money, Money enough, Sir. + +Mr. _Ven._ Why the short and the long of the Business is this; I made a +Purchase lately, and in that I did estate the Child (about which I'm +sued) Joint-Purchaser with me in all the Land I bought. + +Mrs. _Ven._ Right Husband; and you know 'twas I that advised you to make +the Purchase, and therefore I'll never give my Consent to have the Child +brought up by such a stinking Tar-barrel as now sues for him; he'd only +bring him up to be a Swabber; no, no, he was born a Merchant and a +Gentleman, and he shall live and die so. + +_Dodge._ You are a worthy Gentlewoman upon my word; there are but few of +such a noble Temper: But what makes the Fool of the Husband then so +troublesome; does he not know when he's well? + +Mrs. _Ven._ So 'tis a sign. + +_Dodge._ A Blockhead, to proclaim his own Disgrace, and make himself +laugh'd at. + +Mr. _Ven._ That's not it, he hopes to be the better by what is settled +on the Boy. + +_Dodge._ O, God's so, that's true: But never fear, I'll be hang'd if he +carry it, for you have Money, as I told you, Sir, before: but see, Sir, +there they are. + +Mr. _Ven._ Yes, Yes, I saw them before: but come, where's our Wine? +(_Within_) [the Bell rings as at the Bar. + +_Enter Drawer with a Bottle of Wine._ + +_Draw._ Here Sir,--Coming, Coming, Sir: _Philip_, speak up in the +Mermaid, and bid _Jack_ light a Fire. + +[_Exit_ Drawer. + +_Comp._ Well Mr. _Pettifog_, and what think you of my Suit, Sir? + +_Pett._ Why look you Sir, the Defendant you know was arrested first by a +_Latitat_ in an Action of Trespass. + +_Comp._ Yes, and a Lawyer told me, it shou'd have been an Action of the +Case, did he not, Wife? + +_Peg._ I have no Skill in the Law you know Husband, but the Gentleman +did say so. + +_Pett._ Aye, but your Action of the Case in this Point is too ticklish. + +_Comp._ Well, but pray tell me, do you think I shall overthrow my +Adversary? + +_Pett._ Without all doubt, the Child he says is none of yours, What of +that! I marry a Widow, and am by Consequence possess'd of a Ward. Now +shall not I have the Management of that Ward? Now Sir you lie at a +stronger Ward, for _Partus sequitur ventrem_, says the Civil Law: So +that if you were within the Compass of the four Seas, as the Common Law +goes, the Child must be yours, that's certain. + +_Comp._ Say you so, Sir? Why then the Child's my own, for I have been a +Coaster these five Years and more; and so my Service to you: [Drinks]. O +your Attorneys in _Guild-hall_ have a rare time on't, by the Lord +_Harry_. + +_Peg._ They are as it were both Judg and Jury themselves. + +_Comp._ And O how they will laugh at their Clients when they sit in a +Tavern, and call them Fools, Blockheads and Coxcombs, and then whip up +their Causes as nimbly as a Barber trims his Customers on a +_Christmas-Eve_; a Snip, a Wipe and away. + +_Pett._ That's very common, you shall have the like at a _Nisi-prius_. + +_Enter Drawer._ + +_Draw._ Here's a Gentleman, one Mr. Justice _Merryman_, enquires for Mr. +_Ventere_ the Merchant. + +Mr. _Ven._ Here Boy, desire them to walk up. [_Exit_ Drawer.] 'Tis my +Brother, and a Counsellor, to make an End of this same Business. + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman _and a Counsellor; both Tables rise and join +together._ + +_Merr._ Your Servant, Gentlemen, your Servant: Counsellor _Blunder_ and +I have been canvasing the Business of this your Difference; and I +believe, Brother, the Law will determine it as we have done; for it is +point blank against you. + +Mr. _Ven._ If it is, I must be contented: Well Sir, the Child's your +Wife's, and you shall have it; and to endear you the more to't, I'll +settle my part of the Estate on you and yours for ever: Give me your +Hand. + +[_They shake Hands._ + +We now are Friends. + +_Merr._ Why that's well said. + +_Couns._ We all are Witness to the Agreement. + +_Omnes._ All, all. + +_Comp._ Nay I scorn to be outdone in Civility; therefore if you please I +have a Gallon or two of Prize-Wine, and half a Dozen of good sound +_Bruges_-Capons, which I'll treat you and this good Company with at +Supper; but no more Mutton, no not a bit. + +_Merr._ Well Brother, I'm glad you're Friends: Ods bobs I am. But come, +let's home now, and see what's become of the Bride and Bridegroom: +Farewel Friend, farewell: Come we'll pay at the Bar. + +[_Exeunt_ Merr. _Mr._ Vent. _and his Wife,_ Couns. _and_ Dodge. + +_Comp._ Come _Peg_, Come and kiss me. + +[_Compass_ kisses Peg. + +I am Friends with thee too now. + +_Pett._ Aye, aye, you have Reason, she has earn'd you a good Fortune; +and need not venture to Sea any more: Yet one thing let me advise you, +'tis Counsel worth a good Fee, for it cures Cuckoldom. + +_Comp._ Sayst thou so, come let's hear it. + +_Pett._ This it is, Make a flat Divorce between your selves, be you no +longer her Husband, nor she your Wife: Two or three Hours after meet +again, salute, woo and wed afresh, and so the base Name of Cuckold's +blotted quite. This has been experienc'd and approved by many. + +_Comp._ 'Tis excellent i'faith,--There, there's for you; and I thank +you. _Peg_, I renounce thee,--nay and I renounce my self too from thee; +thou art now a Widow, _Peg_; I'll go hang my self two or three Hours at +one o' th' Main Yards, and so long thou shalt go drown thy self. Then +we'll meet in _White-Chappel-Fields_, as it were by chance, and woo and +wed again. + +_Peg._ With all my Heart, kind Sir, fare you well. + +_Comp._ Farewel Widow, remember Time and Place, and d' you hear, Put on +your Sabbath-day best Clothes. + +_Peg._ I will, I will. + +[_Exit Peg._ + +_Comp._ Sir, I am beholding to you for your good Counsel. + +_Pett._ No, Sir, you have paid me for 't, but I hope you do not intend +to follow your own. + +_Comp._ What is that? + +_Pett._ Why, you said you'd hang your self. + +_Camp._ No no, I have thought better on't, for I'll go drink my self +dead drunk, then wake again, wash my Face, and meet the Bride. + +_Pett._ That's well said, and I'll accompany you, and wish you Joy. + +_Comp._ Joy, Sir, I have it Sir already, in a good Estate got by a +Chopping Boy. + +[_Exeunt._ + + +SCENE II. + +_Enter_ Friendly solus. + +_Fri._ Was ever Fortune like to this of mine? Who for the Smile of a +vile simple Woman, have acted thus against my very Soul, all to please a +Creature, whose next Command perhaps will higher mount, it may be light +on my self, as now it did on _Bonvile_. + +_Enter_ Clara. + +_Cla._ Ha! _Friendly_ here alone. Now, now, my Fears begin. + +[_Aside_. + +So, Sir, you are return'd I see. + +[_To him._ + +_Fri._ Madam, I am, and like those noble Knights in former times, after +subduing all their Ladies Foes, returning with the joyful News of +Conquest, receive her trembling to their longing Arms, and claim her as +their own, so I----. + +_Cla._ What mean you, Sir? + +_Fri._ Madam, You are obeyed, your hard Commands fulfilled; at your +Request I've kill'd my Friend, nay and my best of Friends. + +_Cla._ How? kill'd your Friend for me. + +_Fri._ Indeed 'tis true. + +_Cla._ Then thou art truly wretched: But say, say quickly, who's this +unhappy Man whom thy Mistake hath thus untimely kill'd? + +_Fri._ _Bonvile._ + +_Cla._ _Bonvile_ said you? My Blood with an unusual Course runs backward +from my Heart! Horror has seiz'd my Soul! A thick-black Mist has +overcast my Sight, and I am not the same: but speak, O speak again, Was +it _Bonvile_? + +_Fri._ Why shou'd you seek to iterate my Guilt, by a Rehearsal of that +dreadful Name? Too sure, alas! It was: _Bonvile_'s the Friend I've +kill'd. + +_Cla._ Curs'd be the Tongue that spoke it, but doubly curs'd the Hand +that did the barbarous Fact. + +_Fri._ Why Madam, was it not your Command to kill my Friend; nay more, +my best of Friends? + +_Cla._ Yes, and I thought my self your best of Friends. + +_Fri._ I hope you wou'd not have had me murder'd you? + +_Cla._ No, Monster, no. + +_Fri._ These are Riddles. + +_Cla._ Fool, our whole Sex is made of nothing else: Thou mayst sooner +untie the Gordian Knot, expound the Problems of the monstrous _Sphynx_, +and read what is decreed in the mysterious Book of Fate, than unfold a +Woman's sly malitious Meaning. + +_Fri._ Very well; she first set me on to do this most accurs'd of Deeds, +and now upbraids me; nay wou'd hang me for 't: These are the Tricks of +all her damning Sex. O Woman, Woman, Woman, dear devilish Woman, +farewel. + +[_Offers to go._ + +_Cla._ Stay _Friendly_, all I have said was only to try your Constancy; +and whether you'd repent of what you've done. But tell me truly, is +_Bonvile_ surely dead? + +_Fri._ Indeed he is. + +_Cla._ 'Tis bravely done, and I adore thee for 't. By Heaven I love thee +now, even unto Dotage! + +_Fri._ Was ever Change like this? The subtlest Labyrinth Wit cou'd ere +invent, affords not half so many Turnings as a Woman's Mind. + +[_Aside._ + +What mean you, Madam, by this seeming Transport? + +_Cla._ O _Friendly_, _Friendly_, I am all o're Extasy! Thou hast done a +Deed that ravishes my Soul. At once thou hast kill'd my dear and only +Friend, and slain the fatal'st Enemy I had. + +_Fri._ What more Riddles Madam, pray explain your self. + +_Cla._ I will; I will declare a Secret which till now I never did +disclose: I lov'd that _Bonvile_ whom thou now hast slain, not as I +ought to do, but with a Woman's Love, which he never did know: And +Yesterday when I beheld the fatal Marriage ended, then like a Merchant +walking on the _Downes_, sees a rich Vessel of his own engaged, and +after took, and born away a Prize: So I, after I'd seen my _Bonvile_ +lost, (for so he was to me) resuming all the Malice of a Woman, resolved +never to entertain one Thought of Love again; but lead a Life as +_Lapland_ Witches do, only on others Ruines: Then when you approached me +with the hateful Sound of Love, to dash your Hopes, and put a Period to +your growing Passion, I bid you kill your best and dearest Friend? + +_Fri._ True. + +_Cla._ Now the best Friend to one in Love, is Love it self. + +_Fri._ O my curs'd Stars, that wrap'd me up in such a black Mistake, +What have I done? + +_Cla._ Done! Why you have done bravely, why do you tremble? + +_Fri._ An inward Guilt lies heavy on my Soul, and Horror with all her +dreadful Forms still haunts my Sight. And did you love this _Bonvile_? + +_Cla._ The Queen of Beauty never doted more on her beloved _Adonis_ than +I on him. + +_Fri._ And now as much you hate him: O the unheard-of Inconstancy of +Women! All that they have is feign'd; their Teeth, their Hair, their +Blushes, and their Smiles; nay their very Conscience (if any such they +have) is feign'd; all counterfeit and false: Let them wash, patch and +daub themselves with all the Helps for Nature that Art cou'd e're +invent, still they are Women: And let 'em rob all _India_ of its store +to adorn themselves therewith, still are they not all that thing call'd +Woman: I know not what to do, for I love and hate this Creature both at +once. + +_Cla._ What ails my _Friendly_? + +_Fri._ But _Bonvile_ yet must feel his Enemies Rage; shall he succeed in +Love, whilst I am cross'd in mine? No, it must not, cannot, nay it shall +not be. + + _Four Heads I have, to make a Plot not common; + Malice, Revenge, the Devil, and a Woman._ + +[_Offers to go._ + +_Cla._ What will you leave me then? + +_Fri._ Leave thee; yes, forever: Fly thee as I wou'd a Blast from Hell: +Thou art thy self a Hell; thy base detested hateful Woman's Breath +infects the purest Air: + + _May my Friend's Blood, which I for thee have spilt, + Light on thy Head, and your's be all the Guilt._ + +[_Exeunt_ severally. + +_Enter_ Compasse _new clothed_, Pettifog, _and two or three Men +Neighbors._ + +_Comp._ Gentlemen and Neighbours, as you have been Witnesses to our +Divorce, so shall ye now be Evidences to our next Meeting, which I look +for every Minute. + +1st _Neigh._ I came for that Intent, Neighbour. + +_Comp._ I thank you: well, I do not think but you'll all see me come off +with as smooth a Forehead, and make my Wife as honest a Woman as a Man +wou'd desire sometimes, I mean of her Rank; and a teeming Woman, as you +know she has been: Nay, I do not think but the Child too will be found +to be as lawful a Child as any Couple of unmarried People can beget. + +2d _Neigh._ We long to see it Neighbour _Compasse_, that so some of us +may do the like upon the same occasion. + +_Comp._ You're in the right, old Stitch of the World: But soft, see +where she comes with a whole Bundle of as good sound Maidens as her +self. + +_Enter_ Peg _new cloth'd, with three or four Women Neighbours._ + +Stand aside a little, and mind me I pray. + +_Omnes._ Agreed, agreed. + +_Comp._ Good Morrow fair Maid. + +_Peg._ In truth Sir you are mistaken in both, for I am neither fair, nor +yet a Maid. + +_Comp._ No, what are you then I pray, a Wife? + +_Peg._ That indeed I was, but alas,--I am now a Widow. + +_Comp._ A Widow say you? Nay then I must make bold with you; for look +you, your Case is somewhat like mine, I being a Husband without a Wife. + +1st _Neigh._ Aye neighbour, this is something like. + +_Pett._ They begin well, let them go on. + +_Comp._ How long have you been a Widow, good Woman? Nay pray do not weep +forsooth. + +_Peg._ I can't choose but cry, to think of the great Loss I had. + +_Comp._ Why, was he an honest Man? + +_Peg._ Honest quoth a', I vow and protest he was as honest a Man as e're +broke Bread. O I shall never have such another. + +[_Cries out._ + +_Comp._ By my Faith now Mistress you have had a great Loss indeed, for +an honest Man is not to be found every where, nor in every Street. + +_Pett._ The Rogue's witty. + +2d _Neigh._ Aye, aye, let 'em go on. + +_Comp._ And how long is it since you lost this honest Husband? + +_Peg._ O dear, his Memory is too fresh; and the Sight of you doubles my +Sorrow. + +_Comp._ The Sight of me, say you; why, was he so like me? + +_Peg._ As one Apple to another; your two Hands are not more alike. + +_Comp._ Nay then I cannot blame thee to weep: An honest Man he was I +warrant him; and you have had a mighty Loss, that's the Truth on't: But +was he proportioned like me, so well limb'd, and of such a wholesom +Complexion, heh! + +_Peg._ No Twins were ever more alike. + +_Comp._ Well I love, his Memory is still better and better: and how many +Children did he leave behind him? + +_Peg._ Only one, Sir. + +_Comp._ A Boy or a Girl? + +_Peg._ A dainty fine Boy, Sir. + +_Comp._ Just my own case still; my Wife (rest her Soul) left me a Boy +too, a lusty chopping Boy of his Age (as they tell me, for I never saw +it). + +_Peg._ So is mine. + +_Comp._ And what Profession was your Husband of? + +_Peg._ A Seaman. + +_Comp._ Heigh! my own Faculty too! And can you like a Man of that +Profession again? + +_Peg._ Yes surely, for his dear sake, whom I lov'd so tenderly, I shall +always esteem a Sailer. + +_Comp._ Shall you so? why then here's your Man: What say you, Is't a +Match? + +_Peg._ Dear me, I am so ashamed, and yet to speak the Truth, I do like +you hugely, and wou'd like you better still, if it were not for one +thing, which a little troubles me. + +_Comp._ What's that? + +_Peg._ Why, you know sometimes we are forc'd to endure the Absence of +our Husbands a long while, mehappen many Years, and then if there be any +Slip in us, (as long Vacations will make Lawyers hungry) the World is +apt to censure and scandalize us; and brand us with wanton Living and +Incontinency; when alas! if they wou'd but consider our Condition, and +the mighty Longings we often naturally have for Flesh and Blood, they +wou'd not blame us, so they wou'd not. + +_Comp._ Come, come, no Matter, canst thou love me, Widow? + +_Peg._ Ah, if I durst but speak my Mind, I know what I wou'd say. + +_Comp._ Durst, why who do you fear? here's none but an honest Gentleman, +some few Friends and Neighbours; let them hear a God's Name what you +wou'd say, and never blush for the Matter. + +1st _W. Neigh._ Aye, aye, speak Neighbour, pray speak your Mind, and +fear not. + +_Peg._ I shall be thought too weak to yield at first Sight. + +2d _W. Neigh._ Paw! paw! that's only Nicety. + +_Peg._ Well then I do love him dearly and dearly, so I do. + +[_Runs and kisses him_. + +_Comp._ And I thee with all my Heart and Soul. + +[Comp. _kisses_ Peg. + +Now we'll be merry, and have a Song, shall we not my Neighbours? + +3d _Neigh._ Marry will we, Neighbour _Luff_ and Mrs. Bride, will ye give +us a Song? + +_Peg._ With all my Heart, come Neighbour. + + A DIALOGUE. + + Man: + + _Faith and Troth I love thee dearly, + Tho I do but bluntly woo, + Prithy then resolve me clearly, + Whether I am beloved by you. + Long I shall not keep a pother, + Like a senseless whining Beau; + If you won't I'll court another + Who will never say me no._ + + Woman: + + _Friend, your self, nor Humour neither + With my Fancy disagree, + Yet I must find clearer Weather + Er'e I venture out to Sea. + Court another at your Pleasure + Win her in the Honey-moon, + She may chance repent at leisure, + For believing you too soon._ + + Man: + + _Leave your damn'd Fantastick Trials, + Which procure a Lover's Pain, + Pox upon these sham-Denials, + 'Tis but spending time in vain. + With Embraces happy make me, + Nature fram'd you to be kind; + Kiss me, and the Devil take me + If I ever change my Mind._ + + Woman: + + _I'll pursue the good old Fashion, + Practise still by those are wise, + Throughly try my Lover's Passion, + E're I let him grasp the Prize. + Spite of Oaths you wou'd forsake me, + Shou'd I let you once embrace: + If I kiss, the Devil take me, + Till the Parson has said Grace._ + + Chorus. + + _Since then Nation + Has made it a Fashion, + Let's send for a Black Coat, whilst we're in the Mind. + But it is damn'd Slavery, + And Priestly Knavery, + That Parsons must conjure e're Lovers be kind._ + +_Com._ So, so, here now shall we be Man and Wife again to Morrow, as +good as ever. What tho we met as Strangers, we may happen to love ne're +the worse for all that--Gentlemen and Neighbours, I invite ye all to my +Wedding. + +_Omnes._ We'l not fail you, and wish you Joy. + +_Com._ Did I not tell you that I would fetch it cleverly off? Let any +Man call me Cuckold if he dares now. + +_Petti._ 'Tis slander in him I assure you who-ever does. + +_Com._ Nay it will be _Petti Lacenary_ at least, and without Compass of +the General Pardon too: And for the Child, let me hear him that dares +say, I am not the Father. + +_Petti._ Sure none will dare dispute it. + +_Com._ Or that my Wife that is to be, is not as honest a Woman as some +other Mens Wives are. + +_Petti._ No question of that. + +_Com._ O how fine and smooth my Brows are now! + +_1 M. Neigh._ Aye but when you're married, they'll come to themselves +again I warrant ye. + +_Com._ My Friends, if you please, you may call me Mr. Bridegroom now, +for the Guests are all bidden to the Wedding. + +_1 M. Neigh._ We know it, Mr. Bridegroom, they are Indeed, and we'll not +fail you upon our Words. + +_Comp._ + + _Come then, brisk Widow, e're the next Ebb and Tide, + I'le be thy Bridegroom, and thou sha't be my Bride._ + +_Exeunt omnes._ + + +_The End of the Fourth ACT._ + + + + +ACT the Fifth. + + +_Enter_ Arabella _on one Side_. + +Summerfield _meeting her from the other_. + +_Ara._ Mr. _Summerfield_, I now am truly happy, my Prayers at last are +heard; and Heaven has restored my Husband to my Arms. + +_Sum._ I just now heard the joyful News, and thought to have been my +self the welcome Messenger of his Return, but find I'me come too late; +have you seen him? + +_Art._ No; as yet I have not. + +_Sum._ 'Tis somewhat strange! + +_Ara._ Others perhaps may judg it so, but my uncommon Joy for his +Return, admits no other Thought, but those of Transport for his Safety. + +_Sum._ O happy _Bonvile_! How I admire and wonder at thy Choice! + +_Enter_ Friendly. + +Madam, a Wife like you, exceeds the greatest Blessing sure on Earth. + +_Fr._ The nearest way to a secure Revenge, is private Malice, which, +like _Aside._ a Spark long lying hid amongst neglected Ashes, by the +least Blast of Wind becomes it self a Flame--Ha!, who have we here? +Thrice blest Occasion! which thus have offered me at once the Scope of +my revengeful Wishes. 'Tis _Arabella_ and her Darling _Summerfield_, one +who, in the Bridegroom's Absence, is grown thus intimate with his +beloved Bride. A strong Foundation on which I'll now erect a brave +Revenge; I'll step aside and observe them. + +[_Retires to one side of the Stage._ + +_Ara._ Sir, I hope he'll soon be here, and return the Kindness you have +shown me; so I take my leave, with hourly expectation of a much-long'd +for Husband. + +_Sum._ And I, with a Gratitude never to be forgotten, kiss your fair +Hand, and hope that all things will answer your Expectation. [_Exit_ +Arabella. + +_Fri._ Ay, 'tis so, now must I counterfeit a friendly Face to make a +farther Discovery. + +[_Aside._ + +Sir, your humble Servant: without Offence, may I be so bold as to beg +the Favour of your Name? + +_Sum._ The Question I must confess is somewhat familiar, and in my +Opinion improper for a Stranger at first sight; but yet I ne're disown'd +it to a Gentleman--'tis _Summerfield_. + +_Fri. Summerfield!_ Sir, I kiss your Hand;, and must congratulate your +good Success, but more admire your Valour. Had we many such noble +Commanders on board our Fleet, we need not fear it where e're it sails. + +_Sum._ Pray, Sir, stretch not your Love into Flattery, 'twill make me +then suspect your Kindness. And the Author of this Story was too much my +Friend I see, since he has given you this so very partial Account, the +more to augment my Fame. + +_Fri._ O! that's your Modesty, Sir: But if I might be so happy as to be +honour'd with your Acquaintance---- + +_Sum._ Sir, the Honour (if any) would be wholly on my Side; therefore I +desire to know your Name. + +_Fri._ _Friendly_, Sir. + +_Sum._ An Acquaintance; I suppose, of Mr. _Bonvile's_. + +_Fri._ One that thinks himself much honour'd in being stiled his Friend. + +_Sum._ I have often heard your Name indeed before; but till now Fortune +never afforded me the sight of you. + +_Fri._ You of all Men ought to bless Fortune, who still has been +indulgent to you on all Occasions; and scatter'd her Favours on you, +with as prodigal a Hand as tho you were her sole Care and only Minion. + +_Sum._ What mean you, Sir? Again you exceed the Bounds of Love and +Friendship; I never thought any of _Bonvil's_ Friends cou'd be guilty of +so base and vile a thing as Flattery: But, pray, unfold your meaning. + +_Fri._ 'Tis this; I just now saw you part with the Bride, with such +courteous Actions, as spoke no small Esteem in her kind Favour; and +therein I think you the happiest of Men. + +_Sum._ How! + +_Fri._ Mistake me not, I only as a Friend applaud your Happiness, bless +the Influence of your kinder Stars, and praise your Fortune that hath +given you this sweet Occasion. + +_Sum._ What Occasion, Sir? + +_Fri._ Of being serviceable to the fair Virgin Bride in her extreamest +need, after her being so unkindly left, nay, on her Wedding Day, by an +ungrateful Husband, in doing her those neglected Duties, her Youth and +Beauty justly did demand. + +_Sum._ On my Life some Plot against the Bride: I'll sound him 'till I +find the very Bottom--[_Aside._]--Sir, you are merry: But suppose the +Case your own, wou'd you have miss'd so tempting an Occasion? + +_Fri._ No, Sir, they're too precious to be omitted: But I hear you two +call Cousins, comes your Kindred by the _Merryman's_ or the _Bonvile's_? + +_Sum._ Neither! we were wholly Strangers 'till of late, and 'tis a word +of Courtesy only interchange'd between us for some private Reasons. + +_Fri._ This goes as I cou'd wish. [_Aside._] + +_Sum._ I desire you not to grow too inward with me, on so short an +Acquaintance: Not that I'de have you think the Lady of so base a +Disposition to grant me any thing beyond the Rules of Decency and +Honour. The only Favour I e're receiv'd from her, was a Present of those +Bracelets she wears about her Arms, and that Chain of Gold and Pearl she +has about her Neck; all which either of us may own without a Blush. + +_Fri._ How, the Chain and Bracelet, say you! Those were the first Tokens +of her Husband's Love. + +_Sum._ Methinks you look concern'd at what I've said; yet I have said no +more than what I am obliged in Honour to maintain, and will: therefore I +hope, as you'r a Gentleman, you'l not turn Informer. + +_Fri._ O pray think not so poorly of me. + +_Enter a Servant who whispers_ Summerfield. + +_Sum._ Tell her I'le wait on her immediately. + +[_Exit Servant._ + +Sir, some Business of Importance calls me hence; therefore some other +time I hope I shall have the Happiness of enjoying your Company longer. + +[_Exit_ Sum. + +_Fri._ Sir, your humble Servant. +Tell her I'll wait on her immediately, said he; this must be _Arabella_ +that he's going to: Better still. + + _The Work's begun, now I am made or lost; + He runs the best who holds out to the Post: + And all the Comfort in Adversity, + Is to see others as miserable as me._ + +Who have we here? Old _Merryman_! As I live 'tis he! + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman. + +_Mer._ O Master _Friendly,_ you're happily returned: But where's my +Son-in-Law? + +_Fri._ Alas, Sir, the unhappy _Bonvile_ is---- + +_Mer._ Is, is, what is he? Heh! speak; is he living, or is he dead; or +what's become of him? + +_Fri._ O! that I had the Marble _Niobes_ Heart! Or that I had suck'd the +Milk of Wolves and Tigers; so that I might have told, without the least +remorse of Sorrow, what now I dare not, nay, I cannot speak, for fear at +once I melt my self in Tears, and break your aged Heart. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Mer._ Then I suppose he's killed; say, is he not? Hast thou inticed him +from his Bride for this, thou inhumane Wretch? Yet speak, and tell me +truly, for I'm prepared to hear the worst of Ills; Is he then slain? + +_Fri._ No, Sir, but dangerously wounded. + +_Mer._ Not mortally, I hope; but whereabouts is he so desperately +wounded? In his Arms, his Legs, or Body? + +_Fri._ Neither, Sir, but in as perfect Health as when he left you. + +_Mer._ Strange! sure thou art all o're a Mystery, and form'st these +Riddles to try my Wit. + +_Fri._ No, Sir, for all I have said, you in effect will surely find I +told you he was wounded, did I not? + +_Mer._ Yes, you did. + +_Fri._ And so he is. + +_Mer._ But where, whereabout, I ask you once again? + +_Fri._ I see you force the unwilling Secret from me--Why, he's wounded. + +_Mer._ He's wounded, he's wounded, but where, where is he wounded? + +_Fri._ In his Fame, Honour and Reputation, more mortal than a thousand +fleshy Wounds. + + _For such slight Baubles, Cures are oft obtain'd; + But injur'd Honour ne're can be regain'd._ + +_Mer._ How! how! how's this? wounded in his Honour, fay'll thou? Tell me +the Villain that has defam'd him, and this good old Sword shall slit the +Rascal's Wind-pipe. + +_Fri._ O, Sir, your Daughter, your Daughter, Sir---- + +_Mer._ Ha! what's that? what's that? is she injur'd too? + +_Fri._ No, no Sir, my falling Tears quite drown my feeble Voice, I +cannot utter what I fain would speak--Your Daughter's false, false to +her _Bonvile_! And by the help of her beloved _Summerfield_, has robb'd +my Friend of all he cou'd call Dear, I mean his Fame. + +[_Seems to weep._ + +_Mer._ A Pox o' your Crocodile's Tears. Why, Sirrah, Sirrah, do you call +my Daughter Whore? Hey, Swords and Daggers, Blunderbusses and Pistols, +shall I bear this? Hark you, you my Friend, and no Friend, what a Kin do +you take me to be to this Gentlewoman, Heh? + +_Fri._ Her Father, Sir. + +_Mer._ Audacious Villain, O that I had thee in some private Corner, +where none you'd either see or hear us, this Sword shou'd justify my +Daughter's Honour; I'de Whore you with a Pox to you, so I wou'd. + +_Fri._ Your Pardon, Sir, I only did inform you as a Friend, that by your +fatherly Admonitions, you might refrain her from her undecent Course. + +_Mer._ Pox o' your friendly Intelligence. + +_Fri._ The Jewels which her Husband did present her, as the first Sign +and Confirmation of the happy Contract, she to my certain Knowledg has +given to---- + +_Mer._ To whom, to whom thou wicked Slanderer? tell me, Sarrah, quickly, +quick, quick. + +_Fri._ To _Summerfield_. + +_Mer._ Ha, ha, ha, the Fool makes me laugh; Ha, ha, ha, why 'twas but +just now that I saw e'm on her Neck and Arms. + +_Fri._ She was no Woman, had she not the Sense to get them against her +Husband's coming. + +_Mer._ But pray tell me, how is't possible that she cou'd part with 'em, +when they are lock't on, and the Key with her Husband? + +_Fri._ O, Sir, that's no Question to be ask'd in these Times: Women +_have found a way to make use of other Keys besides their Husbands: And +no doubt but_ Summerfield _has got a Key will open your Daughter's lock +as well as_ Bonvile's. + +_Mer._ Sirrah you lie, you lie Sirrah; and I'le tell thee thou ly's, +again and again, so I will. Nay, and I were to pay a 100 Pounds for +every Lie I give thee, as Men do Twelve-pence for every Oath they swear, +I wou'd spend all the Thousands I am worth, in giving thee the Lie. 'Tis +likely indeed, that such a brave Gentleman as _Summerfield_, that fought +at Sea like a Dragon to save my Life, should shorten my Days on Land in +ruining my Daughter; therefore once more I tell you you Lie. + +_Fri._ 'Tis very well. + +_Me._ Do you hear Sir, have you told this Lie to any body else but me? + +_Fri._ I am no Informer, Sir. + +_Mer._ Why then for fear you shou'd, do ye see, draw, [_Draws_] Draw, I +say, I am not so old but I can make a shift to cut your Throat still; +I'le spoil your Carking, I'le warrant ye. + +_Enter_ Bonvile _and_ Clara. + +A Pox on't, here's my Son-in-Law come to hinder me, Duce take him cou'd +he not stay a little longer? D'ye hear Sir, begon, leave this Place +immediately, or I'le--I'le--I'le--Gad I cou'd find in my Heart, so I +cou'd, but be gone. + +_Fri._ _Bonvile_ here with _Clara_ too, excellent. This goes to +_Arabella_, and may it encrease the Storm. + +[_Exit_ Frie. + +_Bon._ My Father in Anger. + +_Mer._ O Son, Son, Son! dear Boy, welcome home, Od's bobs you are. + +_Bon._ I humbly thank you, Sir; but am sorry to see you so disturb'd. + +_Mer._ Nothing, nothing, only Mr. _Friendly_ and I have had a Word or +two, that's all, that's all. + +_Bon._ About my going with him, I suppose; but that's past, and I hope, +Sir, you'l be so kind as at my Request to pardon him. + +_Mer._ Indeed Son it was something else; By the Lord _Harry_ I can't +forbear laughing at the Coxcomb, Ha, ha, ha; He told me, Ha, ha, ha, +that one _Summerfield_, a very honest Fellow as ever liv'd, is grown +exceeding familiar with my Daughter, your Wife. + +_Bon._ Ha! my Wife. + +_Mer._ Yes, your Wife, and that he had received Love-Tokens from her. + +_Bon._ How, Love-Token from her! + +_Mer._ Aye, aye, Love-Tokens I call'd 'em when I was a young Man: Nay, +the Rogue was so impudent to tell me, that she had given him those +Jewels which are lock'd about her Neck; Ha, ha, ha. + +_Bon._ The Jewels about her Neck, said you? + +_Mer._. Aye, what ails you Man that you change Colour so? 'Tis all a Lie +Boy I warrant thee: And hadst thou not come just in the Nick of Time, I +think o' my Conscience I shou'd have cut his Throat. + +_Bon._ As I will your Daughters if I find her false: Death, Hell, and +Furies, am I made a Monster already? + +_Cla._ What, Sir, are you return'd for this? + +_Mer._ Hark y' son, hark you; suppose that this Mr. _Friendly_ shou'd +have a secret Inclination to your spouse, d' ye see; and therefore, by +reason he can't obtain his Desire, possesses you with Jealousy to make a +Breach 'twixt you and your Wife. Od's bobs, I don't know, I can't tell +what shou'd be the meaning of his carrying you away on your Wedding-Day, +else, heh, Son, heh. + +_Cla._ Has the Italian Plague then infected you, that you stand thus +unmov'd? + +_Enter_ Summerfield _leading_ Arabella. + +But see here's your Bride. + +_Bon._ And her beloved Adulterer with her! Death and Damnation, must I +stand still and see this? + +_Mer._ Hey day! what the Matter now? + +_Ara._ _Bonvile_ here with _Clara_! Alas too true I find what before I +scarce dar'd to think was so. Is _Bonvile_ then a Traitor, and false to +_Arabella_? + +[_Aside._ + +_Cla._ Madam, at last I've found the pretious Jewel that you so long +have sought in vain. + +[To _Arab._ + +_Ara._ Wear it your self Madam, I lost it, and it must be mine no more. + +_Cla._ What means this sudden Alteration? + +_Mer._ Ods bodikins, as you say, what does she mean? Are ye both mad, +heh? + +_Sum._ Sir, I'm come to pay my Respects to you, and humbly beg a farther +Knowledg of----. + +_Bon._ Of whom, sweet Sir, my Wife or me? + +_Sum._ Ha! your Wife. + +_Bon._ Yes Sir, my Wife, I think the word needs no explaining. + +_Mer._ Pray, Sir, at my Request bear with him, he's strangely out of +Order I assure you. + +_Bon._ The Jewels are as I left 'em ; but the Jewel of her Heart is lost +and thrown away.--Madam, I sent you my Will, did you receive it. + +_Ara._ Yes, I did. + +_Bon._ Let me see it. + +_Ara._ You shall. + +[_Exit_ Ara. + +_Bon._ Sir, I desire a Word or two in private with you, + +[_to_ Summer. + +_Sum._ With all my Heart, Sir. + +_Mer._ What's that, what's that, I'll have no Whispering, Gentlemen. + +_Enter_ Arabella _with the Will._ + +_Ara._ There's your Will, Sir. + +[_Throws it down,_ Bonvile _takes it up._ + +_Bon._ 'Tis well now as you've chang'd your Mind, I'll change this too, +and find another to supply your Place: There's no harm done, the +Marriage is not yet consummated, and you are free to enjoy any, so am I. + +_Ara._ As you please for that: A Man may make a Garment for the Moon, +count all the Stars which twinckle in the Skies, or empty the vast +Ocean, Drop by Drop, sooner than please a Mind so light, so various as +yours. + +_Mer._ Ods bobs, what's this you talk of, altering your Will? + +_Bon._ Yes, Sir, I am so resolved, and will see 't perform'd within this +Hour: My Lawyer lives hard by, and so farewel. + +[_Exit. Bon._ + +_Mer._ Farewel thou peevish Boy, I can alter my Will too so I can, marry +can I; I had left him 20000 Pound after my Death, and he shall see I can +find another Executor too. Within this Hour did he say, Gad I'll be with +one as soon as he, unless he rides Post to the Devil, and that's the +nearest way to a Lawyer. + +_Sum._ I'll follow him, and asswage his Passion. + +_Mer._ By no means, Sir.--But now I think on't, I'll go with you, and +find him out: But did you ever see the like, did you ever see the like? +Come Sir, come follow me + +[_Exit._ Merr. & Summer. + +_Cla._ Dear _Arabella_ what can all this mean? + +_Ara._ Can you be doubtful of the Effect, who are your self the Cause? + +_Cla._ I the Cause, Inform me how? + +_Ara._ O _Clara, Clara_, your Syrens Voice has drawn my _Bonvile_ from +these spotless Virgins Arms, and made me ever wretched! + +_Cla._ Who (if thou ever lov'dst me) tax'd me with a Crime so foul, as I +abhor to hear it only named? + +_Ara._ _Friendly._. + +_Cla._ O _Arabella_, forgive and pity me, who am indeed the innocent, +unhappy Cause of all those Griefs which now afflict you both; which I'll +relate in brief, if you will please to withdraw one Moment with me. + +_Ara._ With all my Heart. + +_Cla._ Come then: + + _And since your Ruine I did first conspire, + I'll all appease, thus Fire's expell'd by Fire._ + +[_Exeunt._ + +_Enter Justice_ Merryman _and_ Summerfield. + +_Mer._ Sir, do you take me for your Friend? + +_Sum._ Why d' you ask me such a Question, Sir? 'twere base Ingratitude +to entertain any other Thought. + +_Mer._ Why then d' ye see, Sir; as you are my Friend, you must not fight +my Son _Bonvile_. + +_Sum._ Not fight him Sir! you amaze me. + +_Mer._ Aye, aye, aye; that's all one: I understand your dumb Signs and +your low Whispers, the French Mode all over, to smile and grin a Man in +the Face, and at the same time privately cut his Throat. Therefore +prithe be ruled by me, and don't fight him, for shou'd you kill him, my +poor Girl wou'd break her Heart, quite break her Heart. [_Sobs and +cries._] I grant that you are wrong'd, and so I dare swear is my dear +Child: but he's her Husband, and must be born with, ods bobs he must. + +_Sum._ Heaven be my Witness, I ne're entertain'd a Thought like it! + +_Mer._ That's well, that's well, I am heartily glad on't, ods bobs I am +heartily glad. + +[Enter _Friendly_. + +But here comes one that has made all this Mischief; and him I'll fight +my self for all I'm a Justice of the Peace. Come, come, Sir, Draw, draw; +you'll belie my Daughter again wil you? Come, draw, I say, Draw. + +[_Draws._ + +_Fri._ Sir, as I am a Gentleman, I scorn to deny my Words, but there's +my Author, whether good or ill. + +_Mer._ Who, he? He, do ye mean him? + +_Fri._ Yes, Sir. + +_Sum._ True, Sir, I am; For, at his Return to Town from _Barn-Elms_, it +was my Chance to meet him; and after a ceremonious Complement or two, I +found him diving into my private Thoughts concerning the Bride your +Daughter: I, not to be behind-hand with him, join'd Wit with Wit to +sound his shallow Soul. I told him then, how her Jewels once were mine; +but the manner of my obtaining them, I for my own sake did conceal from +him; and now, if you're disposed, I'll here relate it. + +_Enter_ Bonvile _leading_ Arabella, Clara _and_ Spruce, _Mr._ Venter +_and Mrs._ Venter. + +_Mer._ Let it be before all this Company then: What, and my Son and +Daughter too so loving again? Nay then all's well, ods bobs it is, and +they shall hear it, ods bobs they shall. + +_Bon._ I have heard the Story, Sir, already; and _Friendly_, you I +pardon too, for Enemies in War take all Occasions to undo each other; +yet tho I am your Enemy, I'll be generous still, and make you Master of +your wish'd for Mistress. + +[_To_ Clara.] + +Come, Madam, receive this worthier Passion of your _Friendly_, whom I +know you both admire and love. + +[_Gives her to_ Friendly. + +Next I must obtain your Pardon for my Rashness. + +_Sum._ Sir, 'tis what I first ought to have begg'd of you: And that the +World may'nt tax this innocent Lady of a Crime to her purest Thoughts +unknown, I'll here begin my Story from my first Acquaintance to this +happy Hour. + +_Mer._ Prithy do. + +_Sum._ The first time that I e're beheld her Face, I wou'd have robb'd +her. + +_Mer._ Ah Rogue! What, a Thief, a Thief, what wou'd you have robb'd her +of? + +_Sum._ Not her Honour, I assure you, Sir, but only of those Jewels which +she wears. + +_Mer._ Ods bobs, thou wert an honest Thief, for that I faith he was. + +_Sum._ They being fast, I cou'd not get 'em off without some Harm and +Pain to her: which for the _Indies_ I'd not have done. And she, in +answer to my Civility, brought me home, and ransom'd them with the full +Price in Gold, (with which I made my Venture) and the more to hide my +Shame, she honour'd me with the Title of her Kinsman. + +_Mer._ Ay, ay, and so she might well; for she was a little cunning Thief +too, to steal the Gold she gave you from her Husband; 'twas all his now, +but that's no matter, proceed. + +_Sum._ The rest you know already, Sir. + +_Mer._ Ay, so I do, ods bobs I do, thy Valour my brave Boy, thy Valour, +for which I'll do for thee, that thou shalt never need to rob again I +warrant thee; ods bobs I will. But come, come, we lose time, for we have +another Wedding yet to be perform'd, but that shall be done within. + + Sum. _Then farewel all ye treacherous Paths of Vice, + Which lead Men blindfold to their End, + In time like me repent you that are wise, + And by Restraint your vicious Courses end._ + + Ara. _Were I to ask of Heaven its greatest Bliss + On Earth, it cou'd bestow not one like this. + After a Storm the Sun still shines most bright, + And from the Chaos sprung the purer Light._ + + Bon. _A Day like this sure yet has never been, + Wherein such various Changes e're were seen. + Fortune to Day that work'd my Overthrow, + Has made me happy in a Minute now. + Bless'd with a vertuous Wife my Days I'll spend, + And ne're trust Man, lest I mistake my Friend._ + + + + +EPILOGUE, + +Spoke by the City-Bride. + + + _You met with good Intention to be witty, + And rally the Grave Cuckolds of the City; + But disappointed of your Recreation, + I in your Looks can read the Play's Damnation. + Lord! how ye stare to find an honest Bride, + A thing you think a Monster in_ Cheapside. + _Whither you boast that you so often come, + And leave your footmen to perform at home. + Yet 'tis no little Comfort t' us howe're, + You oftner bring th' Estate than get the Heir. + Unjustly therefore you your Fortune blame, + She's kinder to your Blood that to your Name._ + + _After all this, I know you think it Pity, + That I shou'd break the Custom of the City: + I hear a Beau cry, 'tis some damn'd Mistaker; + A_ Cheap-side _Vertue, City Cuckold maker. + This is a Fault no Gentleman can pardon, + It gives_ Cheapside _the Sins of_ Covent-Garden: + _We must refine on Vice, and take new Measures, + Since dull chain'd Cits invade our darling Pleasures._ + + _Take my Advice, employ at home your Backs, + Or_ Locket's _Revels may revenge_ Pontack's: + _This Cuckolding to you's a losing Trade, + That pay for making, and for being made. + The Ladies will my Character excuse, + And not condemn a Vertue which they use._ + + _If any here be guilty of Transgression, + 'Tis of Necessity, not Inclination: + They'd be contented in their proper Houses, + Cou'd they reform their unperforming Spouses. + Yet if some wanton Appetites there be, + How many are there that can fast like me. + Those are enow, if I have their Applause, + The Poet has his End, and I my Cause. + + +FINIS. + + + + +PUBLICATIONS OF THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY + + +FIRST YEAR (1946-47) + +Numbers 1-4 out of print. + +5. Samuel Wesley's _Epistle to a Friend Concerning Poetry_ (1700) and +_Essay on Heroic Poetry_ (1693). + +6. _Representation of the Impiety and Immorality of the Stage_ (1704) +and _Some Thoughts Concerning the Stage_ (1704). + + +SECOND YEAR (1947-1948) + +7. John Gay's _The Present State of Wit_ (1711); and a section on Wit +from _The English Theophrastus_ (1702). + +8. Rapin's _De Carmine Pastorali_, translated by Creech (1684). + +9. T. Hanmer's (?) _Some Remarks on the Tragedy of Hamlet_ (1736). + +10. Corbyn Morris' _Essay towards Fixing the True Standards of Wit, +etc._ (1744). + +11. Thomas Purney's _Discourse on the Pastoral_ (1717). + +12. Essays on the Stage, selected, with an Introduction by Joseph Wood +Krutch. + + +THIRD YEAR (1948-1949) + +13. Sir John Falstaff (pseud.), _The Theatre_ (1720). + +14. Edward Moore's _The Gamester_ (1753). + +15. John Oldmixon's _Reflections on Dr. Swift's Letter to Harley_ +(1712); and Arthur Mainwaring's _The British Academy_ ( 1712). + +16. Nevil Payne's _Fatal Jealousy_ (1673). + +17. Nicholas Rowe's _Some Account of the Life of Mr. William +Shakespeare_ (1709). + +18. "Of Genius," in _The Occasional Paper_, Vol. III, No. 10 (1719); and +Aaron Hill's Preface to _The Creation_ (1720). + + +FOURTH YEAR (1949-1950) + +19. Susanna Centlivre's _The Busie Body_ (1709). + +20. Lewis Theobold's _Preface to The Works of Shakespeare_ (1734). + +21. _Critical Remarks on Sir Charles Grandison, Clarissa, and Pamela_ +(1754). + +22. Samuel Johnson's _The Vanity of Human Wishes_ (1749) and Two +_Rambler_ papers (1750). + +23. John Dryden's _His Majesties Declaration Defended_ (1681). + +24. Pierre Nicole's _An Essay on True and Apparent Beauty in Which from +Settled Principles is Rendered the Grounds for Choosing and Rejecting +Epigrams_, translated by J. V. Cunningham. + + +FIFTH YEAR (1950-51) + +25. Thomas Baker's _The Fine Lady's Airs_ (1709). + +26. Charles Macklin's _The Man of the World_ (1792). + +27. Frances Reynolds' _An Enquiry Concerning the Principles of Taste, +and of the Origin of Our Ideas of Beauty, etc._ (1785). + +28. John Evelyn's _An Apologie for the Royal Party_ (1659); and _A +Panegyric to Charles the Second_ (1661). + +29. Daniel Defoe's _A Vindication of the Press_ (1718). + +30. Essays on Taste from John Gilbert Cooper's _Letters Concerning +Taste_, 3rd edition (1757), & John Armstrong's _Miscellanies_ (1770). + + +SIXTH YEAR (1951-1952) + +31. Thomas Gray's _An Elegy Wrote in a Country Church Yard_ (1751); and +_The Eton College Manuscript._ + +32. Prefaces to Fiction; Georges de Scudery's Preface to _Ibrahim_ +(1674), etc. + +33. Henry Gally's _A Critical Essay_ on Characteristic-Writings (1725). + +34. Thomas Tyers' A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson (1785). + + + + +William Andrews Clark Memorial Library: University of California + +THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY + +_General Editors_ + +H. RICHARD ARCHER William Andrews Clark Memorial Library + +E.N. HOOKER University of California, Los Angeles + +R.C. BOYS University of Michigan + +JOHN LOFTIS University of California, Los Angeles + +The Society exists to make available inexpensive reprints (usually +facsimile reproductions) of rare seventeenth and eighteenth century +works. The editorial policy of the Society continues unchanged. As in +the past, the editors welcome suggestions concerning publications. All +income of the Society is devoted to defraying cost of publication and +mailing. + +All correspondence concerning subscriptions in the United States and +Canada should be addressed to the William Andrews Clark Memorial +Library, 2205 West Adams Boulevard, Los Angeles 18, California. +Correspondence concerning editorial matters may be addressed to any of +the general editors. The membership fee is $3.00 a year for subscribers +in the United States and Canada and 15/- for subscribers in Great +Britain and Europe. British and European subscribers should address +B. H. Blackwell, Broad Street, Oxford, England. + + +Publications for the sixth year [1951-1952] + +(At least six items, most of them from the following list, will be +reprinted.) + +THOMAS GRAY: _An Elegy Writt in a Country Church Yard_ (1751). +Introduction by George Sherburn. + +JAMES BOSWELL, ANDREW ERSKINE, and GEORGE DEMPSTER: _Critical Strictures +on the New Tragedy of Elvira_ (1763). Introduction by Frederick A. +Pottle. + +_An Essay on the New Species of Writing Founded by Mr. Fielding_ (1751). +Introduction by James A. Work. + +HENRY GALLY: _A Critical Essay on Characteristic Writing_ (1725). +Introduction by Alexander Chorney. + +[JOHN PHILLIPS]: _Satyr Against Hypocrits_ (1655). Introduction by Leon +Howard. + +_Prefaces to Fiction._ Selected and with an Introduction by Benjamin +Boyce. + +THOMAS TYERS: _A Biographical Sketch of Dr. Samuel Johnson_ ([1785]). +Introduction by Gerald Dennis Meyer. + +Publications for the first five years (with the exception of NOS. 1-4, +which are out of print) are available at the rate of $3.00 a year. +Prices for individual numbers may be obtained by writing to the Society. + + +THE AUGUSTAN REPRINT SOCIETY +_WILLIAM ANDREWS CLARK MEMORIAL LIBRARY_ +2205 WEST ADAMS BOULEVARD, LOS ANGELES 18, CALIFORNIA + +Make check or money order payable to THE REGENTS OF THE UNIVERSITY OF +CALIFORNIA. + + + +--------------------------------------------------------------+ + | Transcriber's Notes & Errata | + | | + | Spellings of names, abbreviations and a number of other | + | words, punctuation including the use of apostrophes, use of | + | accents, hyphenation and italicisation are very inconsistent | + | in the text. They have been transcribed as in the text, | + | except for very obvious typographical errors. | + | | + | In the Preface, the underlined words have been represented | + | as italicised words. | + | | + | Superscripts in the Preface have been preceded by carat | + | characters. | + | | + | Embedded stage directions in the text have been left in | + | situ, enclosed in square brackets. | + | | + | End-of-line and centred stage directions in the text have | + | been placed on their own lines. | + | | + | The following words occur in both hyphenated and | + | unhyphenated forms in the text. The number of instances of | + | each word are given in parentheses. | + | | + | |Cheap-side (1) |Cheapside (2) | | + | |Hoo-ra (2) |Hoora (3) | | + | |me-thinks (2) |methinks (4) | | + | |Merry-man (2) |Merryman (10) | | + | |who-ever (1) |whoever (1) | | + | | + | The following obvious typographical errors have been | + | corrected. | + | | + | |Error |Correction | | + | |is is |is | | + | |wihin |within | | + | |the |thee | | + | |the the |the | | + | |Names |Name | | + | |Speaker's name omitted. |Fri. | | + | |Salvage |Savage | | + | | + +--------------------------------------------------------------+ + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The City Bride (1696), by Joseph Harris + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE CITY BRIDE (1696) *** + +***** This file should be named 22974.txt or 22974.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/2/9/7/22974/ + +Produced by David Starner, LN Yaddanapudi and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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