diff options
| -rw-r--r-- | .gitattributes | 3 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 22034-8.txt | 7465 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 22034-8.zip | bin | 0 -> 146796 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | 22034.txt | 7465 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 22034.zip | bin | 0 -> 146685 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | LICENSE.txt | 11 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | README.md | 2 |
7 files changed, 14946 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/22034-8.txt b/22034-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..b7429d9 --- /dev/null +++ b/22034-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,7465 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Narrative of some of the Lord's Dealings +with George Müller, by George Müller + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Narrative of some of the Lord's Dealings with George Müller + Written by Himself. Second Part + +Author: George Müller + +Release Date: July 10, 2007 [EBook #22034] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LORD'S DEALINGS WITH GEORGE MÜLLER *** + + + + +Produced by the Bookworm (bookworm.librivox AT gmail.com) + + + + + +A NARRATIVE OF SOME OF THE LORD'S DEALINGS WITH GEORGE MÜLLER + +WRITTEN BY HIMSELF + +SECOND PART + + +PREFACE TO THE + +FIRST EDITION OF THE SECOND PART. + +THROUGH grace I am, in some measure, conscious of my many weaknesses +and deficiencies; but, with all this, I know that I am a member of +the body of Christ, and that, as such, I have a place of service in +the body. The realization of this has laid upon me the responsibility +of serving the church in the particular way for which the Lord has +fitted me, and this has led me to write this second little volume, if +by any means those of my fellow-saints, who have not yet learned the +importance and preciousness of dealing with God Himself under all +circumstances, may be helped in learning this lesson. Nor did I think +that the first part of this Narrative rendered the second part +needless, because that contains more especially the Lord's dealings +with me as an individual, whilst this gives, more particularly, an +account of the remarkable way in which the Lord has helped me in +reference to His work in my hands. For this second part carries on +the account of the Orphan-Houses, etc., which are under my care, and +contains the substance of the Reports previously published, so that +any one who wishes to have the account from the beginning up to the +end of last year, may be able to obtain it. This latter point alone +made it needful for me to think about publishing this second part, as +of the Reports for 1838 and 1839, which still almost daily are +inquired after, there are only a few copies left, though 2,500 of the +one and 3,000 of the other were published and of the Report for 1840 +there are also only about 500, out of 4,000, remaining. The being +thus able to put the whole account of the work into the hands of an +inquiring individual, affords such a one a fairer opportunity of +seeing the working of those scriptural principles on which the +Institution is established. And, lastly, the Lord's continued +blessing upon the first part of the Narrative and the Reports, both +to believers and unbelievers, has induced me to publish this second +volume, which I now affectionately commend to the prayers of the +saints, requesting at the same time their prayers for myself. + +GEORGE MULLER. + +Bristol, June 14, 1841. + + + +SECOND PART + +In publishing the continuation of the Narrative of some of the Lord's +dealings with me, I have thought it well to give it in the same form +in which the larger portion of the former part is written. I +therefore proceed to give extracts from my journal making here and +there such remarks as occasion may seem to require. The first, part +of the Narrative was carried on to the beginning of July 1837, from +which period the Continuation commences. + +July 18, 1837. Four trials came upon me this morning, without my +having previously had opportunity for secret prayer. I had been +prevented from rising early, on account of having to spend part of +the night in a sick chamber; but this circumstance shows, how +important it is to rise early, when we are able, in order that we may +be prepared, by communion with the Lord, to meet the trials of the +day. + +Aug. 15. Today the first 500 copies of my Narrative arrived, and I +had, once more, some conflict of mind whether, after all, I had not +been mistaken in this matter. A sort of trembling came over me, and a +wish to be able to retrace the step. Judging, however, from the most +searching self-examination, through which I had caused my heart to +pass again and again, as to my motives, before I began writing, and +whilst I was writing; and judging, moreover, from the earnestness in +prayer with which I had sought to ascertain the mind of God in the +matter, and from the subsequent full assurance which I had had of its +being according to His will, that in this way I should serve the +Church;--I was almost immediately led to consider this uncomfortable +and trying feeling as a temptation, and I therefore went to the box, +opened it, brought out some copies, and soon after gave away one, so +that the step could not be retraced. [This was the last temptation or +struggle I have had of that kind; for, though, very many times since, +I have had abundant reason for praising the Lord that He put such an +honour upon me, in allowing me to speak well of His name in so public +a manner, I have never since, even for one minute, been allowed to +regret publishing the Narrative; and almost daily have I been more +and more confirmed in the conviction, that the giving such like +publications to the church, making known the Lord's dealings with me, +is one part of my service towards the saints.] + +Aug. 17. Today two more children were received into the Infant +Orphan-House, which makes up our full number, 66 in the Girls' and +infant-Orphan-Houses. + +Aug. 28. When brother Craik and I began to labour in Bristol, and +consequently some believers united with us in fellowship, assembling +together at Bethesda, we began meeting together on the basis of the +written Word only, without having any church rules whatever. From the +commencement it was understood, that, as the Lord should help us, we +would try everything by the word of God, and introduce and hold fast +that only which could be proved by Scripture. When we came to this +determination on Aug. 13, 1832, it was indeed in weakness, but it was +in uprightness of heart.--On account of this it was, that, as we +ourselves were not fully settled as to whether those only who had +been baptized after they had believed, or whether all who believed in +the Lord Jesus, irrespective of baptism, should be received into +fellowship nothing was determined about this point. We felt free to +break bread and be in communion with those who were not baptized, and +therefore could with a good conscience labour at Gideon, where the +greater part of the saints, at least at first, were unbaptized; but, +at the same time, we had a secret wish that none but believers who +were baptized might be united with us at Bethesda. Our reason for +this was, that we had witnessed in Devonshire much painful disunion, +resulting, as we thought, from baptized and unbaptized believers +being in fellowship. Without, then, making it a rule, that Bethesda +Church was to be one of close communion, we nevertheless took care +that those who applied for fellowship should be instructed about +baptism. For many months there occurred no difficulty, as none +applied for communion but such as had either been already baptized, +or wished to be, or who became convinced of the Scriptural character +of believers' baptism, after we had conversed with them; afterwards, +however, three sisters applied for fellowship, none of whom had been +baptized; nor were their views altered, after we had conversed with +them. As, nevertheless, brother Craik and I considered them true +believers, and we ourselves were not fully convinced what was the +mind of the Lord in such a case, we thought it right that these +sisters should be received; yet so that it might be unanimously, as +all our church acts then were done; but we knew by that time, that +there were several in fellowship with us, who could not +conscientiously receive unbaptized believers. We mentioned, +therefore, the names of these three sisters to the church, stating +that they did not see believers' baptism to be scriptural, and that, +if any brother saw, on that account, a reason why they should not be +received, he should let us know. The result was, that several +objected, and two or three meetings were held, at which we heard the +objections of the brethren, and sought for ourselves to obtain +acquaintance with the mind of God on the point. Whilst several days +thus passed away before the matter was decided, one of those three +sisters came and thanked us, that we had not received her, before +being baptized, for she now saw that it was only shame and the fear +of man which had kept her back, and that the Lord had now made her +willing to be baptized. By this circumstance those brethren, who +considered it scriptural that all ought to be baptized before being +received into fellowship, were confirmed in their views; and as to +brother Craik and me, it made us, at least, still more question, +whether, those brethren might not be right; and we felt therefore, +that in such a state of mind we could not oppose them. The one +sister, therefore, who wished to be baptized, was received into +fellowship, but the two others not. Our consciences were the less +affected by this, because all, though not baptized, might take the +Lord's supper with us, at Bethesda, though not be received into full +fellowship; and because at Gideon, where there were baptized and +unbaptized believers, they might even be received into full +fellowship; for we had not then clearly seen that there is no +scriptural distinction between being in fellowship with individuals +and breaking bread with them. Thus matters stood for many months, +i.e. believers were received to the breaking of bread even at +Bethesda, though not baptized, but they were not received to all the +privileges of fellowship.--In August of 1836 I had a conversation with +brother H. C. on the subject of receiving the unbaptized into +communion, a subject about which, for years, my mind had been more or +less exercised. This brother put the matter thus before me: either +unbaptized believers come under the class of persons who walk +disorderly, and, in that case, we ought to withdraw from them (2 +Thess. iii. 6); or they do not walk disorderly. If a believer be +walking disorderly, we are not merely to withdraw from him at the +Lord's table, but our behaviour towards him ought to be decidedly +different from what it would be were he not walking disorderly, on +all occasions when we may have intercourse with him, or come in any +way into contact with him, Now this is evidently not the case in the +conduct of baptized believers towards their unbaptized fellow-believers. +The Spirit does not suffer it to be so, but He witnesses that +their not having been baptized does not necessarily imply +that they are walking disorderly; and hence there may be the +most precious communion between baptized and unbaptized believers. +The Spirit does not suffer us to refuse fellowship with them in +prayer, in reading and searching the Scriptures, in social and +intimate intercourse, and in the Lord's work; and yet this ought to +be the case, were they walking disorderly.--This passage, 2 Thess. +iii. 6, to which brother R. C. referred, was the means of showing me +the mind of the Lord on the subject, which is, that we ought to +receive all whom Christ has received (Rom. xv. 7), irrespective of +the measure of grace or knowledge which they have attained unto.--Some +time after this conversation, in May 1837, an opportunity occurred, +when we (for brother Craik had seen the same truth) were called upon +to put into practice the light which the Lord had been pleased to +give us. A sister, who neither had been baptized, nor considered +herself under any obligation to be baptized, applied for fellowship. +We conversed with her on this as on other subjects, and proposed her +for fellowship, though our conversation had not convinced her that +she ought to be baptized. This led the church again to the +consideration of the point. We gave our reasons, from Scripture, for +considering it right to receive this unbaptized sister to all the +privileges of the children of God; but a considerable number, +one-third perhaps, expressed conscientious difficulty in receiving +her. The example of the Apostles in baptizing the first believers +upon a profession of faith, was especially urged, which indeed would +be an insurmountable difficulty, had not the truth been mingled with +error for so long a time, so that it does not prove willful +disobedience, if any one in our day should refuse to be baptized +after believing. The Lord, however, gave us much help in pointing out +the truth to the brethren, so that the number of those, who +considered that only baptized believers should be in communion, +decreased almost daily. At last, only fourteen brethren and sisters +out of above 180, thought it right, this Aug. 28, 1837, to separate +from us, after we had had much intercourse with them. [I am glad to +be able to add, that, even of these 14, the greater part afterwards +saw their error, and came back again to us, and that the receiving of +all who love our Lord Jesus into full communion, irrespective of +baptism, has never been the source of disunion among us, though more +than forty-four years have passed away since.] + +Sept. 2. I have been looking about for a house for the Orphan Boys, +these last three days. Every thing else has been provided. The Lord +has given suitable individuals to take care of the children, money, +&c. In His own time He will give a house also. + +Sept. 6. This morning I accompanied a sister, who had been staying a +night with us, to the steamer. In answer to prayer I awoke at the +right time, the fly came at half-past five, her trunk was got from +the vessel in which she came yesterday, and we arrived before the +steamer had left. In all these four points I felt my dependence upon +the Lord, and He, having put prayer into my heart, answered it in +each of these four particulars. + +Sept. 15. This evening we had a meeting for inquirers and applicants +for fellowship. There were more than we could see within three hours; +and when all strength was gone, we had to send away four. Among those +whom we saw was E. W., who had been kept for some time from applying +for fellowship, on account of not seeing believers' baptism to be +scriptural. She wished to be taught, but could not see it. She felt +grieved that on that account she could not attend to the breaking of +bread, which she did see to be scriptural. As soon as open communion +was brought about at Bethesda, she wished to offer herself for +fellowship, but was twice prevented by circumstances from doing so. +Last Wednesday evening she came to the baptizing, when once more, +after the lapse of more than two years, I preached on baptism, which +fully convinced her of its being scriptural, and she desires now to +be baptized. Her difficulty was, that she thought she had been +baptized with the Spirit, and therefore needed no water baptism, +which now, from Acts x. 44-47, she sees to be an unscriptural +objection.--Though it is only one month this day since my Narrative +was published, I have already heard of many instances in which the +Lord has been pleased to bless it. + +This morning we received a parcel with clothes and some money for the +Orphans, from a sister at a distance. Among the donations in money +was a little legacy, amounting to 6s. 6 1/2d. from a dear boy, the +nephew of the sister who sent the things, who died in the faith. This +dear child had had given to him, in his last illness, some new +shillings, sixpences, and other smaller silver coins, amounting to +the above-mentioned little sum. Shortly before he fell asleep, he +requested that this his little treasure might be sent to the Orphans. +This precious little legacy is the first we have had. + +Sept. 19. Two things were today particularly impressed upon my heart, +and may the Lord deepen the impression. 1. That I ought to seek for +more retirement, though the work should apparently suffer ever so +much. 2. That arrangements should be made, whereby I may be able to +visit the brethren more, as an unvisited church will sooner or later +become an unhealthy church. Pastors, as fellow-labourers, are greatly +needed among us. + +Sept. 28, I have for a long time been too much outwardly engaged. +Yesterday morning I spent about three hours in the vestry of Gideon, +to be able to have more time for retirement. I meant to do the same +in the afternoon, but before I could leave the house I was called on, +and thus one person after the other came, till I had to go out. Thus +it has been again today. + +Oct. 16. For a long time past brother Craik and I have felt the +importance of more pastoral visiting, and it has been one of our +greatest trials, that we have been unable to give more time to it. +This evening we had purposely a meeting of the two Churches, at which +brother Craik and I spoke on; I. The importance of pastoral visiting. +II. The particular obstacles which hindered us in attending to it. +III. The question whether there was any way of removing some of the +obstacles. + +I. As to the importance of pastoral visiting, the following points +were mentioned: 1. Watching over the saints, by means of visiting +them, to prevent coldness, or to recover them from backsliding. 2. To +counsel and advise them in family affairs, in their business, and in +spiritual matters. 3. To keep up that loving familiar intercourse, +which is so desirable between the saints and those who have the +oversight of them.--These visits should be, if possible, frequent; but +in our case there have been several obstacles in the way. + +II. The particular obstacles in our case are: 1. The largeness of the +number who are in communion with us. One hundred would be quite as +many as we have strength to visit regularly, and as often as would be +desirable; but there are nearly 400 in fellowship with us. 2. The +distance of the houses of the saints from our own dwellings, as many +live more than two miles of. 3. The Lord's blessing upon our labours. +Not one year has passed away, since we have been in Bristol, without +more than fifty having been added to our number, each of whom, in +general, needed several times to be conversed with before being +admitted into fellowship. 4. That brother Craik and I have each of us +the care of two churches. At the first sight it appears as if the +work is thus divided, but the double number of meetings, &c., nearly +double the work. 5. The mere ruling, and taking care, in general, of +a large body of believers, irrespective of the other work, takes much +more time, and requires much more strength, than the taking care of a +small body of believers, as we, by grace, desire not to allow known +sin among us. 6. The position which we have in the church at large +brings many brethren to us who travel through Bristol, who call on +us, or lodge with us, and to whom, according to the Lord's will, we +have to give some time. 7. In my own case an extensive needful +correspondence. 8. The weakness of body on the part of both of us. +When the preaching is done,--when the strangers who lodge with us are +gone,--when the calls at our house are over,--when the needful +letters, however briefly, are written,--when the necessary church +business is settled;--our minds are often so worn out, that we are +glad to be quiet. 9. But suppose we have bodily strength remaining +after the above things have been attended to, yet the frame of mind +is not always so, as that one could visit. After having been +particularly tried by church matters, which in so large a body does +not rarely occur, or being cast down in one's own soul, one may be +fit for the closet, but not for visiting the saints. 10. Lastly, in +my own case, no small part of my time is taken up by attending to the +affairs of the Orphan-Houses, Schools, the circulation of the +Scriptures, the aiding Missionary efforts, and other work connected +with the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. + +III. What is to be done under these circumstances? 1. In the days of +the Apostles there would have been more brethren to take the +oversight of so large a body as we are. The Lord has not laid upon us +a burden which is too heavy for us; He is not a hard master. It is +evident that He does not mean us even to attempt to visit all the +saints as much as is absolutely needful, and much less as frequently +as it would be desirable. We mention this, to prevent uncomfortable +feelings on the part of the dear saints under our pastoral care, who +find themselves not as much visited as they used to be when we came +to Bristol, when the number of them was not 70, and now it is about +400, and when in many other respects the work in our hands was not +half so much, as it is now, and when we had much more bodily +strength. 2. it is therefore evident that there are other pastors +needed; not nominal pastors, but such as the Lord has called, to whom +He has given a pastor's heart, and pastoral gifts. 3. Such may be +raised up by the Lord from our own number, or the Lord may send them +from elsewhere. 4. But in the meantime we should at least see whether +there are not helpers among us. 5. As to the work itself, in order +that time may be saved, it appears desirable that the two churches, +Bethesda and Gideon, should be united into one, that the breaking of +bread should be alternately, and that the number of weekly meetings +should be reduced. + +Oct. 21. A few weeks since I had rented a very large and a very cheap +house for the Boys' Orphan-House; but as the persons who lived in +that neighbourhood threatened the landlord with an action, on account +of letting his house for a charitable institution, I, at once, gave +up all claim. That which led me to do so, was the word of the Lord; +"As much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men." I was quite +sure when I gave up the agreement, that the Lord would provide other +premises. On the same morning when this took place, Oct. 5, the Lord, +to show His continued approbation of the work, sent 50l. by a sister, +who is far from being rich, for the furnishing of the Boys' +Orphan-House. Now, today, the Lord has given me another house for the +Orphan-Boys, in the same street, in which the other two Orphan-Houses +are. Thus, in His own time, He has sent help in this particular also. +Indeed in everything, in which I have had to deal with Him alone in +this work, I have never been disappointed. + +Oct. 23. Today two young sisters were received into fellowship who +have been in our Sunday-School. Thus we begin now to reap fruit in +respect of our schools. + +Nov. 1. Our Bible-School and Missionary funds having been for some +time very low, I had been led repeatedly to ask the Lord for a rich +supply, and mentioned several times, though with submission to His +will, the sum of 100l. before Him. However, He seemed not to regard +the prayer respecting the 100l., but gave to us by little and little +what was needed. Yesterday I received a donation of 80l., and today +one of 20l., and thus He has kindly given the 100l. By this means we +are able to increase our stock of Bibles, which has been much reduced +of late. + +Nov. 5. Last night I awoke with a great weakness in my head, which +kept me a good while awake. I at last got to sleep by tying a +handkerchief round my head, and by thus pressing it. Today, however, +though weak, I was able to preach, and that with much enjoyment, +especially in the evening at Bethesda. + +Nov. 6. I feel very weak in my head. This evening it was settled at a +meeting of the two churches, assembling at Bethesda and Gideon +Chapels, that, for the reasons before given, the two churches should +be henceforth united as one. + +Nov. 7. My head is so weak, that I see it absolutely needful to give +up the work for some time. After I had come this morning to the +conclusion to leave Bristol for a while for the purpose of quietness, +I received an anonymous letter from Ireland with 5l. for my own +personal expenses, and thus the Lord has kindly supplied me with the +means for doing so.--I can work no longer, my head being in such a +weak stated from continual exertion, so that I feel now comfortable +in going, though scarcely any time could have been, humanly speaking, +more unsuitable. The Orphan-House for the Boys is on the point of +being opened, the labourers therefore are to be introduced into the +work;—-most important church matters have been entered upon and are +yet unsettled;—-but the Lord knows better, and cares for His work +more than I do or can. Therefore I desire to leave the matter with +Him, and He graciously helps me to do so, and thus, in the quiet +submission to His will, and the willingness to leave the work in His +own hands, I have the testimony that I have not been engaged in my +own work but in His. + +Nov. 8. This morning I left Bristol. When I left my house, I knew not +what place to go to. All I knew was, that I must leave Bristol. A +Bath coach was the first one I could get, and I took it. My intention +was, not to go to brethren, as I needed perfect quietness; but I felt +so uncomfortable at the hotel, on account of the worldliness of the +place, that I went to see a brother, who with his aunts kindly +pressed me to stay with them.--This evening has been a very trying +season to me. My head has been very weak; I have greatly feared lest +I should become insane; but amidst it all, through grace, my soul is +quietly resting upon the Lord. + +Nov. 12. Lord’s day. I am still staying in Bath. The weakness of my +head allowed me to attend but one meeting, and even that distressed +my head much. + +Nov. 13. I was greatly distressed this evening on account of my head. +I prayed earnestly to be kept from insanity. + +Nov. 14. I am rather better in my head today. + +Nov. 15. I left Bath, and went back to Bristol, as I felt I needed +more quietness than I can have in the house of any friends, being +continually drawn into conversation, which my head cannot bear. + +Nov. 16. Today I went to Weston Super Mare, to take lodgings for +myself and family. A sister sent me this morning 5l., by which the +Lord has provided me with the means for removing my family. + +Nov. 17. Weston Super Mare. This evening my wife and child, and our +servant arrived here. Yesterday a sister secretly put two sovereigns +in my wife’s pocket book. How kind is the Lord in thus providing us +with means according to our need! How kind also in having just now +sent brother T. to take the work arising from the Schools, +Orphan-Houses, &c., just as brother C—r was sent two years ago, +shortly before I was completely laid aside!—-Today a brother sent me +information, that he had ordered one hundred pairs of blankets to be +sent to me, for distribution among the poor. + +Nov. 23. My general health is pretty good; my head, however, is no +better, but rather worse. This evening I was led, through the +affliction in my head, to great irritability of temper. Of late I +have had afresh painfully to experience in myself two things: 1. that +affliction in itself does not lead nearer to God. 2. That we may have +a good deal of leisure time and yet fail in profitably improving it. +Often had I wished within the last months that I might have more +time. Now the Lord has given it to me, but alas! how little of it is +improved for prayer. I find it a difficult thing, whilst caring for +the body, not to neglect the soul. It seems to me much easier to go +on altogether regardless of the body, in the service of the Lord, +than to take care of the body, in the time of sickness, and not to +neglect the soul, especially in an affliction like my present one, +when the head allows but little reading or thinking.-—What a blessed +prospect to be delivered from this wretched evil nature! I can say +nothing respecting this day, and this evening in particular, but that +I am a wretched man. + +Nov. 24. I am now quite sure that I want more than mere quiet and +change of air, even medical advice. My general health seems improved +through my stay at Weston, but the disease in my head is increased. I +have had many distressing moments since I have been at Weston, on +account of fearing that my disease may be the forerunner of insanity; +yet God has in mercy sustained me, and enabled me, in some small +measure, notwithstanding my great sinfulness, to realize the blessing +of being in Christ, and therefore secure for ever. + +Nov. 25. We returned to Bristol. I was at peace, being able to cast +myself upon the Lord respecting the calamity which I feared. This +evening I saw a kind physician and surgeon, who told me that the +disease is either a tendency of blood to the head, or that the nerves +of the head are in a disordered state. They also told me that I had +not the least reason to fear insanity. How little grateful is my soul +for this! + +Nov. 29. I am no better. A sister sent me today 5l. also a pickled +tongue, fowls, cakes, and beautiful grapes were sent to me. My cup, +as to temporal mercies, runs over.—-One of the Orphan children died +while I was at Weston Super Mare. There is reason to believe that she +died in the faith. + +Nov. 30. I am not any better. I have written to my father, perhaps, +for the last time. All is well, all will be well, all cannot but be +well; because I am in Christ. How precious that now, in this my +sickness, I have not to seek after the Lord, but have already found +Him. + +Dec. 1. By the mercy of God my head is somewhat relieved. My liver is +in a most inactive state, which, as my kind medical attendants tell +me, has created the pressure on the top of the head, and through the +inactivity of the liver, the whole system having been weakened, and +my mental exertions having been continued, the nerves of the head +have greatly suffered in consequence.-—This evening was sent to me, +anonymously, from a distance, 5l. for my own present necessities. The +letter was only signed F. W.—-A sister, a stranger, gave to my wife +1l. Thus the Lord remembers our increased expenditure in consequence +of my affliction, and sends to us accordingly. + +Dec. 4. Yesterday I met with the brethren for the breaking of bread. +Today I am not so well. Every time that I meet with them, the nerves +of my head are excited, and I am worse afterwards. A sister from +Barnstaple sent us 1l. l5s. + +Dec. 8. My head is not so well as at the end of last week. I find it +difficult to be in Bristol and not to exert my mind. Prayer and the +reading of the Word I can bear better than any thing. May the Lord +give me grace to pray more! I see as yet scarcely a single reason, so +far as I myself am concerned, why the Lord should remove this +affliction from me. I do not find myself more conformed to the mind +of Jesus by it. + +Dec. 9. Two years ago this day, I stated my intention of establishing +an Orphan-House, if God should permit. What has God wrought since! 75 +orphans are now under our care, and 21 more we can receive. Several +more are daily expected. During the last twelvemonth the expenses +have been about 740l., and the income about 840l. In addition to +this, about 400l. has been expended upon the Schools, the circulation +of the Scriptures, and in aiding Missionary purposes. More than +1100l. therefore we have needed during the past year, and our good +Lord has supplied all, without one single person having been asked +for any thing. + +Dec. 12. Today the hundred pairs of blankets arrived. How kind of the +Lord to give us the privilege of being instrumental in providing, in +this respect, for some of the poor, both among the saints and in the +world! This donation came in most seasonably, as, on inquiring into +the circumstances of some of the poor, most affecting cases of +distress were discovered, on account of the want of blankets. May the +Lord give me grace to deny myself, in order to provide for the +necessities of the poor! How much may be done even by a little +self-denial! Lord, help me!-—The blankets were of a very good +quality. It is a Christlike spirit in supplying the necessities of +the poor, not to ask how little will do for them, but how richly may +I possibly supply their need. + +Dec. 14. A sister, who a short time since had given me 5l. for my own +personal expenses, gave me another 5l. today. How very kind is the +Lord in providing so abundantly for us, and giving us far more than +we need! + +Dec. 16. My head is not at all better, but rather worse. My medical +attendants have today changed the medicine. But however kind and +skillful they are, however nourishing the food which I take, however +much I seek to refrain from over-exertion, and however much I take +exercise in the air:—-till Thou, my great Physician, Thou, Creator of +the Universe, Lord Jesus, dost restore me, I shall be laid aside!—-I +have been working a little during the last fortnight, but only a +little. + +Dec. 17.-—Lord’s day. This morning I saw the 32 orphan girls, who are +above seven years old, pass under my window, to go to the chapel. +When I saw these dear children in their clean dresses, and their +comfortable warm cloaks; and when I saw them walking orderly under +the care of a sister to the chapel; I felt grateful to God that I had +been made the instrument of providing for them, seeing that they are +all better off, both as it regards temporal and spiritual things, +than if they were at the places from whence they were taken. I felt, +that, to bring about such a sight, was worth the labour not only of +many days, but of many months, or years. I felt that it answered all +the arguments of some of my friends who say "you do too much." + +Dec. 24. This is the seventh Lord’s day that I have been laid +aside.—-This day I determine, by the help of God, no more to send +letters in parcels, because I now clearly see that it is against the +laws of the country, and it becomes me, as a disciple of Jesus, in +every respect to submit myself to the Government, in so far as I am +not called upon to do any thing contrary to the word of God. + +Dec. 26. Today the same brother who sent me the hundred pairs of +blankets, sent me 100l. to purchase as many more blankets as I can +satisfactorily distribute. + +Dec. 29. Applications for the admission of orphans become more and +more numerous. Almost daily fresh cases are brought before us. There +are already as many applications for Orphan-Girls above seven years +as would fill another house. There are also many more Infant-Orphans +applied for than we can take in. Truly this is a large field of +labour! + +Dec. 31. This is the eighth Lord’s day since I have been kept from +ministering in the Word, nor did I think it well, on account of my +head, to go to any of the meetings today. Whether I am really getting +better I know not, yet I hope I am. My head is yet much affected, +though my liver seems somewhat more active.—-This morning I greatly +dishonoured the Lord by irritability, manifested towards my dear +wife, and that almost immediately after I had been on my knees before +God, praising Him for having given me such a wife. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1837. + + + +I. There are now 81 children in the three Orphan-Houses, and nine +brethren and sisters who have the care of them. Ninety, therefore, +daily sit down to table. Lord look on the necessities of Thy servant! + +II. The schools require as much help as before; nay, more, +particularly the Sunday School, in which there are at present about +320 children, and in the Day Schools about 350.—-Lord, Thy servant is +a poor man; but he has trusted in Thee, and made his boast in Thee, +before the sons of men; therefore let him not be confounded! Let it +not be said, all this is enthusiasm, and therefore it is come to +nought. + +III. My temporal supplies have been:—- + +1. By the Freewill Offerings through the boxes £149 18s. 6 1/2d. + +2. By Presents in money, from believers in and out of Bristol £77 4s. +0d. + +3. By Presents in clothes, provisions, &c., which were worth to us at +least £25 0s. 0d. + +4. By Money through family connexion £45 0s. 0d. + +5. We have been living half free of rent, whereby we have saved at +least £10 0s. 0d. + +Altogether £307 2s. 6 1/2d. + + + +I have purposely given here again, as at the close of the former +years, a statement of the supplies which the Lord has been pleased to +send me during this year, because I delight in showing, both to the +world and to the church, how kind a Master I have served even as to +temporal blessings, and how so plainly in my ease the Lord has +displayed the truth of that word "Whosoever believeth on Him shall +not be confounded," not merely by providing the means for His work in +my hands, but also by providing for the necessities of myself and +family. + + + +January 1, 1838. Through the good hand of our God upon me, I have +been brought to the beginning of an other year. May He in mercy grant +that it may be spent more in His service than any previous year! May +I, through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, be more conformed to +the image of His Son, than has been the case hitherto!—-Last night +the brethren had a prayer meeting at Gideon, after the preaching was +over, and continued till half-past twelve in prayer; but I was unable +to be present. + +Jan. 2. During the last night thieves broke into our house, and into +the school-room of Gideon Chapel. Being stopped by a second strong +door, in my house, or rather being prevented from going any further +by our loving Father, who did not allow the hedge which He has set +round about us, at this time, to be broken through, nothing was +missing, except some cold meat, which they took out of the +house.—-They broke open several boxes in Gideon school-room, but took +nothing. They left some of the bones, the meat being cut off, in one +of the boxes in Gideon school-room, and hung up another in a tree in +our garden. So depraved is man naturally when left to himself, that +he not only steals his fellowman’s property, but also makes sport of +the sin! How merciful that God has protected us! My mind was peaceful +when I heard the news this morning, thanking God from my heart for +preservation, and considering it as an answer to prayer, which had +been many times put up to Him, during these last years, respecting +thieves. + +Jan. 6. I feel very little better in my head, though my general +health seems improved; but my kind physician says I am much better, +and advises me now change of air. I am most reluctant to go, though +on two former occasions when I used change of air, in August 1829 at +Exmouth, and in 1835 at Niton in the Isle of Wight, the Lord +abundantly blessed me in doing so, both bodily and spiritually. This +evening a sister who resides about fifty miles from hence, and who is +therefore quite unacquainted with the medical advice given to me this +morning, sent me 15l. for the express purpose of change of air, and +wrote that she felt assured, from having been similarly afflicted, +that nothing would do me so much good, humanly speaking, as quiet and +change of air. How wonderfully does God work! I have thus the means +of carrying into effect my physician’s advice.-—Today I heard of a +most remarkable case of conversion through the instrumentality of my +Narrative. + +Jan. 7. This is the ninth Lord’s day that I have been kept from +ministering in the Word. My head is in a distressing state, and, as +far as I can judge, as bad as ever. It seems to me more and more +clear that the nerves are affected. My affliction is connected with a +great tendency to irritability of temper; yea, with some satanic +feeling, foreign to me even naturally. O Lord, mercifully keep Thy +servant from openly dishonouring Thy name! Rather take me soon home +to Thyself! + +Jan. 10. Today I went with my family to Trowbridge. + +Jan. 12. Trowbridge. This evening I commenced reading Whitfield’s +life, written by Mr. Philip. + +Jan. 13. I have already received blessings through Whitfield’s life. +His great success in preaching the Gospel is evidently to be +ascribed, instrumentally, to his great prayerfulness, and his reading +the Bible on his knees. I have known the importance of this for +years; I have practiced it a little, but far too little. I have had +more communion with God today than I have had, at least generally, +for some time past. + +Jan. 14. Lord’s day. I have, continued reading Whitfield’s life. God +has again blessed it to my soul. I have spent several hours in prayer +today, and read on my knees, and prayed for two hours over Psalm +lxiii. God has blessed my soul much today. I have been fighting +together with the armies of Jesus, though this is the tenth Lord’s +day since I have been kept from preaching, and though I have not +assembled with the brethren here, on account of my head. My soul is +now brought into that state, that I delight myself in the will of +God, as it regards my health. Yea, I can now say, from my heart, I +would not have this disease removed till God, through it, has +bestowed the blessing for which it was sent. He has drawn out my soul +much yesterday and today. Lord, continue Thy goodness, and fill me +with love! I long, more fully to glorify God; not so much by outward +activity, as by inward conformity to the image of Jesus. What hinders +God, to make of one, so vile as I am, another Whitfield? Surely, God +could bestow as much grace upon me, as He did upon him. O, my Lord, +draw me closer and closer to Thyself, that I may run after Thee!-—I +desire, if God should restore me again for the ministry of the Word +(and this I believe He will do soon, judging from the state in which +He has now brought my soul, though I have been worse in health the +last eight days, than for several weeks previously), that my +preaching may be more than ever the result of earnest prayer and much +meditation, and that I may so walk with God, that "out of my belly +may flow rivers of living water." But alas! if the grace of God +prevent not, one day more, and the rich blessings, which He has +bestowed upon my soul yesterday and today, will all vanish; but +again, if He favours me (and oh! may He do it), I shall go from +strength to strength, and I and the saints in Bristol shall have +abundant reason to praise God for this my illness. + +Jan. 15. I have had since yesterday afternoon less suffering in my +head than for the last eight days! though it is even now far from +being well. I have still an inward assurance, on account of the +spiritual blessings which the Lord has granted to me, that through +this affliction He is only purifying me for His blessed service, and +that I shall be soon restored to the work.—-Today, also, God has +continued to me fervency of spirit, which I have now enjoyed for +three days following. He has today, also, drawn out my soul into much +real communion with Himself, and into holy desires to be more +conformed to His dear Son. When God gives a spirit of prayer, how +easy then to pray! Nevertheless it was given to me in the use of the +means, as I fell on my knees last Saturday, to read His Word with +meditation, and to turn it into prayer. Today I spent about three +hours in prayer over Ps. lxiv. and lxv. In reference to that precious +word! "O thou that hearest prayer," (Ps. lxv. 2.) I asked the Lord +the following petitions, and entreated Him to record them in heaven +and to answer them. + +1. That He would give me grace to glorify Him by a submissive and +patient spirit under my affliction. + +2. That, as I was enabled now, and only now from my heart, to praise +God for this affliction, He would not remove His hand from me, until +He had qualified me for His work more than I have been hitherto. + +3. That He would be pleased to grant, that the work of conversion, +through the instrumentality of brother Craik and myself, might not +cease, but go on as much now as when we first came to Bristol, yea, +more abundantly than even then. + +4. That He would be pleased to give more real spiritual prosperity to +the church under our care, than ever we have as yet enjoyed. + +5. Having praised Him for the sale of so many copies of my Narrative +in so short a time, I entreated Him to cause every copy to be +disposed of. + +6. I asked Him to continue to let His rich blessing rest upon this +little work, and more abundantly, so that many may be converted +through it, and many of the children of God truly benefited by it; +and that thus I might now be speaking through it, though laid aside +from active service. + +7. I asked Him for His blessing, in the way of conversion, to rest +upon the Orphans, and upon the Sunday and Day-School children under +our care. + +8. I asked Him for means to carry on these Institutions, and to +enlarge them. + +These are some of the petitions which I have asked of my God this +evening in connexion with this His own word. I believe He has heard +me. I believe He will make it manifest, in His own good time, that He +has heard me; and I have recorded these my petitions this 14th day of +January, 1838, that, when God has answered them, He may get, through +this, glory to His name.-—[Whilst writing this second part, I add to +the praise of the Lord, and for the encouragement of the children of +God, that petitions 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8, have been fully answered, and +the other petitions, likewise, in part.] + +Jan. 16, Tuesday. A blessed day. How very good is the Lord! Fervency +of spirit, through His grace, is continued to me, though this +morning, but for the help of God, I should have lost it again. The +weather has been very cold for several days; but today I suffered +much, either because it was colder than before, or because I felt it +more, owing to the weakness of my body, and having taken so much +medicine. I arose from my knees, and stirred the fire; but I still +remained very cold. I was a little irritated by this. I moved to +another part of the room, but felt the cold still more. At last, +having prayed for some time, I was obliged to rise up, and take a +walk to promote circulation. I now entreated the Lord on my walk, +that this circumstance might not be permitted to rob me of the +precious communion which I have had with Him the last three days; for +this was the object at which Satan aimed. I confessed also my sin of +irritability on account of the cold, and sought to have my conscience +cleansed through the blood of Jesus. He had mercy upon me, my peace +was restored; and when I returned I sought the Lord again in prayer, +and had uninterrupted communion with Him. [I have purposely mentioned +the above circumstance, in detail, in order to show, how the most +trivial causes may operate in suddenly robbing one of the enjoyment +of most blessed communion with God.] I have been enabled to pray for +several hours this day. The subject of my meditation has been Psalm +lxvi.--Verses 10, 11, and 12, are particularly applicable to my +present circumstances. God has already, through the instrumentality +of this my affliction, brought me into a "wealthy place," and I +believe He will bless my soul yet more and more.—-I do not remember +any time, when I have had more fervency of spirit in connexion with +such a desire to overcome every thing that is hateful in the sight of +God, and with such an earnestness to be fully conformed to the image +of Jesus. Truly, I have reason to apply to myself verse 16, and "tell +what God has done for my soul."--Verse 18 also I can take to myself. +I do not regard iniquity in my heart, but it is upright before Him, +through His grace, and therefore God does hear my prayers.--What has +God done for me, in comparing this 16th of January 1838 with the 16th +of January 1820, the day on which my dear mother died.--I have also +resolved this day, if the Lord should restore me again, to have an +especial meeting at the chapel once a week, or once a fortnight, with +the Orphan and Day-School children, for the purpose of reading the +Scriptures with them.—-My heart has been drawn out in prayer for many +things, especially that the Lord would create in me a holy +earnestness to win souls, and a greater compassion for ruined +sinners. For this I have been quickened through reading onward in +Whitfield’s life. + +Jan. 17. The Lord is yet merciful to me. I enjoy fervency of spirit. +My soul has been again repeatedly led out in prayer this day, and +that for a considerable time.--I have read on my knees, with prayer +and meditation, Psalm lxviii.—Verse 5 "A Father of the fatherless," +one of the titles of Jehovah, has been an especial blessing to me, +with reference to the Orphans. The truth, which is contained in this, +I never realized so much as today. By the help of God, this shall be +my argument before Him, respecting the Orphans, in the hour of need. +He is their Father, and therefore has pledged Himself, as it were, to +provide for them, and to care for them; and I have only to remind Him +of the need of these poor children, in order to have it supplied. My +soul is still more enlarged respecting Orphans. This word "a Father +of the fatherless," contains enough encouragement to cast thousands +of Orphans, with all their need, upon the loving heart of God.--My +head has been again in a distressing state today; my soul, however, +is in peace. May God in mercy continue to me fervency of spirit! + +January 18 to February 2. During this time I continued still at +Trowbridge. I was, on the whole, very happy, and habitually at peace, +and had repeatedly much communion with God; but still I had not the +same earnestness in prayer, nor did I, in other respects, enjoy the +same degree of fervency of spirit, with which the Lord had favoured +me for several days previous to this period.While the considerable +degree of fervency of spirit, which I had had, was altogether the +gift of God, still I have to ascribe to myself the loss of it. It is +remarkable, that the same book, Whitfield’s Life, which was +instrumental in stirring me up to seek after such a frame of heart, +was also instrumental in depriving me of it, in some measure, +afterwards. I once or twice read that book when I ought to have read +the Bible on my knees, and thus was robbed of a blessing. +Nevertheless, on the whole, even this period was a good season.--My +health being not at all improved, it seemed best that I should give +up all medicine for a while, and take a tour; on which account I left +Trowbridge today and went to Bath, with the object of going from +thence to Oxford. I had grace today to confess the Lord Jesus on my +way from Trowbridge to Bath, as also twice, lately, in going from +Trowbridge to Bristol; but I was also twice silent. Oh that my heart +may be filled with the love of Jesus, in order that it maybe filled +with love for perishing sinners! + +Feb. 3. I left Bath this morning, and arrived in the evening at +Oxford, where I was very kindly received by brother and sister ----, +and the sisters ----. + +Feb. 7. Oxford. I had been praying repeatedly yesterday and the day +before, that the Lord would be pleased to guide me, whether I should +leave this place or not; but could not see it clearly to be His will +that I should do so, and therefore determined to stay. Now, as I am +able to have a quiet horse, I shall try horse exercise, if it may +please the Lord to bless that to the benefit of my health. + +Feb. 10. I have had horse exercise for the last three days, but the +horse is now ill. "Mine hour is not yet come," is the Lord’s voice to +me in this little circumstance. + +Feb. 11. This morning I was directed to read Proverbs iii. 5-12, +having just a few minutes to fill up before breakfast. I was +particularly struck with those words: "Neither be weary of His +correction." I have not been allowed to despise the chastening of the +Lord, but I begin, now and then, to feel somewhat weary of His +correction. O Lord, have mercy upon Thy poor unworthy servant! Thou +knowest, that, after the inner man, I desire patiently to bear this +affliction, and not to have it removed till it has done its work in +me, and yielded the peaceable fruits of righteousness. But Thou +knowest also what a trial it is to me to continue the life I am now +living. Help, Lord, according to my need! + +On Feb. 8th I sent a letter to the church in Bristol, which, having +been preserved, I give here in print, as it shows the way in which +the Lord dealt with me during and through the instrumentality of the +affliction, and which, with His blessing, may lead one or other of +the children of God who are in trial, quietly to wait for the end, +and to look out for blessings to be bestowed upon them through the +instrumentality of the trial. + + + +To the Saints, united together in Fellowship, and assembling at +Bethesda and Gideon Chapels, Bristol. + + + +Trowbridge, Feb. 1, 1838. + +Dear Brethren, + +Twelve weeks have passed away, since I last ministered among you. I +should have written to you repeatedly, during that period, had I not +thought it better to put aside every mental occupation which could be +deferred, as my head is unfit for mental exertion; but I would now +rather write a few lines, than appear unmindful of you. You are dear +to me; yea, so dear, that I desire to live and die with you, if our +Lord permit; and why should I not tell you so by letter? I will +write, then, as a token of brotherly remembrance and of love towards +you; and may it be a means of quickening you to prayer on my behalf. + +In looking back upon my past life, I know not where to begin, and +where to end, in making mention of the Lord’s mercies. His +long-suffering towards me in the days of my unregeneracy cannot be +described. You know a little of my sinful life, before I was brought +to the Lord; still you know but very little. If, however, I have much +reason to praise God for His mercies towards me in those days, I have +more abundant reason to admire His gentleness, long-suffering, and +faithfulness towards me since I have known Him. He has step by step +led me on, and He has not broken the bruised reed. His gentleness +towards me has been great indeed, very great. (Brethren, let us +follow God, in dealing gently with each other!) He has borne with my +coldness, half-heartedness, and backsliding. In the midst of it all, +He has treated me as His child. How can I sufficiently praise Him for +this long-suffering? (Brethren, let us imitate our Father, let us +bear long, and suffer long with each other!) He has been always the +same gracious, kind, loving Father, Friend, Supporter, Teacher, +Comforter, and all in all to me, as He was at the beginning. No +variableness has been found in Him towards me, though I have again +and again provoked Him. I say this to my shame. (Brethren, let us +seek to be faithful, in the Lord, towards each other! Let us seek to +love each other in the truth, and for the truth’s sake, without +variableness! It is easy, comparatively, to begin to love; but it +requires much watchfulness, not to grow weary in love, when little or +no love is returned; yea, when we are unkindly treated, instead of +being loved. But as our gracious, faithful God, notwithstanding all +our variableness, loves us without change, so should we, His +children, love each other. Lord, help us so to do!) + +Besides this gentleness, long-suffering, and faithfulness, which the +Lord has manifested towards me, and which I have experienced in +common with you all, the Lord has bestowed upon me peculiar blessings +and privileges. One of the chief is, that He has condescended to call +me for the ministry of His word. How can I praise Him sufficiently +for this! One who was such a sinner, such a servant of Satan, so fit +for hell, so deserving of everlasting destruction, was not merely +cleansed from sin and made a child of God through faith in the Lord +Jesus, and thus fitted for heaven, and did not merely receive the +sure promise that he should have eternal glory; but was also called +unto, and, in a measure, qualified for the expounding of the word of +God. I magnify Him for this honour!—-But more than this. More than +eleven years, with very little interruption, have I been allowed, +more or less, to preach the Word. My soul does magnify the Lord for +this! More still. The Lord has condescended to use me as an +instrument in converting many sinners, and, in a measure at least, in +benefiting many of His children. For this honour I do now praise God, +and shall praise Him not merely as long as I live, but as long as I +have a being. But I do not stop here. I have many other reasons to +speak well of the Lord, but I would only mention one. It is my +present affliction. Yes, my present affliction is among the many +things, for which I have very much reason to praise God; and I do +praise Him for it. Before you, before the whole church of Christ, and +before the world would I confess that God has dealt in very kindness +towards me in this affliction. I own, I have not borne it without +impatience and fretfulness; I own, I have been several times overcome +by irritability of temper on account of it; but nevertheless, after +the inner man, I praise God for the affliction, and I do desire from +my heart, that it may truly benefit me, and that it may not be +removed till the end has been answered, for which it has been sent. +God has blessed me in this trial, and is still blessing me.--As I know +you love me, (unworthy as I am of it), and feel interested about me, +I mention a few of the many mercies with which God has favoured me +during these twelve weeks. 1. At the commencement of my illness, when +my head was affected in a manner quite new to me, and when thus it +continued day after day, I feared lest I should lose my reason.--This +created more real internal suffering than ever I had known before. +But our gracious Lord supported me. His precious gospel was full of +comfort to me. All, all will be well, was invariably the conclusion, +the conclusion grounded upon Scripture, to which I came; yea, all +will be well with me eternally, though the heaviest of all earthly +trials should coins upon me, even that of dying in a state of +insanity.--I was once near death, as I then thought, nearly nine years +ago: I was full of comfort at that time; but to be comfortable,--to +be able quietly to repose upon God, with the prospect of an +affliction before one, such as I have now mentioned,--is more than to +be comfortable in the prospect of death, at least for a +believer.--Now, is it not well to be afflicted, in order to obtain +such an experience? And have I not reason, therefore, to thank God +for this affliction? + + + +Oxford, Feb. 6, 1838. + +When I began to write the foregoing lines, beloved brethren, I +intended to write but very briefly; but as I love you, and as I have +abundant reason to magnify the Lord, my pen ran on, till my head +would follow no longer.--I go on now to mention some other mercies +which the Lord has bestowed upon me, through my present affliction. + +2. Through being deprived for so long a time of the privilege of +preaching the Word to sinners and saints, the Lord has been pleased +to create in me a longing for this blessed work, and to give me at +the same time to feel the importance of it, in a degree in which I +never had experienced it before. Thus the Lord has fitted me somewhat +more for His work, by laying me aside from it. Good therefore is the +Lord, and kind indeed, in disabling me from preaching. Great has been +my trial, after the self-willed old nature, not to be able to preach; +and long ere this, unfit as I was for it, I should have resumed the +work, had I followed my own will; but hitherto have I considered it +most for the glory of God, quietly to refrain from outward service, +in order to glorify Him by patient submission, till my Lord shall be +pleased to condescend to call His servant forth again for active +engagements. And then, I know, He will give me grace, cheerfully to +go back to the delightful service of pointing sinners to the Lamb of +God, and of feeding the church. + +3. Through this affliction I have known experimentally in a higher +degree than I knew it before, how, if obliged to refrain from active +service, one can nevertheless as really and truly help the armies of +Jesus, through secret prayer, as if one were actively engaged in the +proclamation of the truth.--This point brings to my mind a truth, of +which we all need to be reminded frequently, even this, that at all +times, and under all circumstances, we may really and truly serve the +Lord, and fight for His kingdom, by seeking to manifest His mind, and +by giving ourselves to prayer. + +4. Through the instrumentality of this affliction the Lord has been +pleased to show me, how I may lay out myself more fully for His +service in the proclamation of His truth; and, by His grace, if ever +restored for active service, I purpose to practice what He has shown +me. + +5. Through being deprived so much from meeting with the brethren as I +have been these thirteen weeks, I have learned somewhat more to value +this privilege than I did before. For as my head has been much +affected, even through one meeting on the Lord’s day, I have seen how +highly I ought to have prized the days, when twice or thrice I could +meet with the saints, without suffering from it.--Bear with me, +brethren, when I beseech you, highly to esteem the opportunities of +assembling yourselves together. Precede them with prayer; for only in +as much as you do so, have you a right to expect a blessing from +them. Seek to treasure up, not merely in your memory, but in your +heart, the truths which you hear; for soon you may be deprived of +these privileges, and soon you may be called upon to practice what +you hear. Brethren, let us not learn the greatness of our privileges, +by being deprived of them.-- + +I also delight in mentioning some of the particulars in which the +Lord’s kindness to me has appeared in this affliction, and whereby He +has shown, that He does not lay more on us, than is absolutely +needful. + +1. You know, that since May, 1836, I was able to walk but little. +This infirmity the Lord entirely removed, just before I became +afflicted in my head. This was exceedingly kind; for air and exercise +are the only means, which almost immediately relieve my head. How +much greater would have been the affliction, had I not been able to +walk about in the air!-—Truly, "He stayeth His rough wind, in the day +of His east wind." I delight in pointing out the gentleness of the +stroke. + +Oxford, Feb. 7, 1838. + +2. The Lord might have chosen to confine me to my bed, and kept me +there in much pain these thirteen weeks, for the sake of teaching me +the lessons which He purposes me to learn through this affliction; +instead of this, the pain in my head has been so slight, that it +would not be worth mentioning, were it not connected with a weakness +of the mental faculties, which allows of but little exertion. + +3. Further, it might have pleased the Lord to incapacitate me +altogether for active service, but instead of this, He has still +allowed me, in some small measure, to help by my judgment in some +church matters, to write some letters in His service, to speak now +and then a word to believers for the furtherance of their faith, and +to confess His name repeatedly before unconverted persons, with whom +I have met on my journeys. Besides all this, I have had strength for +other work connected with the kingdom of Jesus Christ. + +4. In one other point the Lord has been especially gracious to me, in +that, while I have been unable to preach, unable to write or read +much, or even to converse for any length of time with the brethren, +He has allowed me always sufficient strength for as much secret +prayer as I desired. Even praying with others has been often trying +to my head; but prayer in secret has not only never tried my head, +but has been habitually (I mean the act of prayer) a relief to my +head. Oh! how can I sufficiently praise God for this. How +comparatively slight are any trials to a child of God, as long as +under them he is enabled to converse freely with his Father! And so +sweet has been this communion with my Father, a few times, and so +have I been enabled to pour out my heart before Him, that whilst +those favoured seasons have lasted, I not only felt the affliction to +be no affliction, and could call it, from my heart, sweet affliction; +but I was almost unwilling soon to go back to the multiplicity of +engagements in Bristol, lest I should not have leisure to continue so +much in prayer, meditation, and the study of His word. Shall I not +then praise my Father for such dealings with me? Do I not even now +see this affliction working for my good? I say, therefore, after the +inward man: Father, continue Thy hand upon me, as long as it shall +seem good in Thy sight, only bless my soul!-—But, brethren, do not +mistake me, as if I meant that I prayed habitually with much +earnestness. O no! I pray a little habitually, I pray now and then +much; but I pray by no means as much as my strength and present time +allow me. Therefore ask God on my behalf, that grace may be given me, +habitually to pray much; and you will surely be profited by it.--But I +could not help alluding to this point, as the Lord’s kindness is so +particularly seen in this matter. + +5. Lastly, I cannot omit mentioning the kindness of the Lord, in +opening the houses of some of His children at Bath, Trowbridge, and +Oxford for me, during this my affliction. These dear saints have +shown me much kindness. But while I would be grateful to them for it, +I discern the hand of God in influencing their hearts. Moreover, I +have had kind medical attendants. And you, my dear brethren, though I +have been unable to minister among you, have continued to supply my +temporal wants, for which I thank you, and in all of which I see the +gracious, loving hand of my Father, who through all this, as by a +voice from heaven, tells me: "My child, even bodily health and +strength would I give, were it good for thee." I therefore desire to +wait for the good pleasure of my God concerning this point. + +Your love will naturally ask, how I now am in body. My disease, as my +kind medical friends tell me, is an inactive liver, which causes the +pain in the head, and the inability of exerting my mind for any +length of time. In addition to this, the nerves of the head seem to +have suffered through over-exertion. As medicine had been tried for +about ten weeks, and had not given relief, it appeared well, that I +should give it up for a time, and simply travel about for the benefit +of the air. My own experience teaches me, that this means is +beneficial; for it gives almost immediate relief. In consequence of +this, I left Trowbridge last Friday, and arrived on Saturday evening +at Oxford, where I am staying with dear brother and sister B. I have +here all that brotherly love can do for me, and am in every way +comfortable. It is now a week since I have given up medicine, and I +am at least not worse, if not better; but I think I am a little +better. I wait on the Lord to show me His will, as to the place to +which I should go next. + +As to my inner man, I am in peace, generally in peace, and long for +more conformity to the mind of Christ. My chief desire is, that if it +shall ever please the Lord to restore me again, to be sent back to +active service with increased humility, greater earnestness in the +work, greater love for perishing sinners, and a heart habitually +influenced by the truths which I preach.--Whether I shall ever be +restored for the work, I cannot say with certainty; but, if I may +judge from the Lord’s dealings with me in former times, I have reason +to believe, that I shall yet be allowed to labour again. + +In conclusion, dear brethren, pray for my dear brother and +fellow-labourer. Esteem him highly in the Lord; for He is worthy of +all honour.—-I would write more, for I have much more to speak of; but +as I purpose, if God allows me the pleasure, to write again soon, I +leave it till then. Farewell. + +Your affectionate brother and servant in the Lord, + +GEORGE MULLER. + + + +Feb. 13. These ten days I have been staying in Oxford, though I came +only for one or two; but I have stayed to see the Lord’s hand leading +me away from hence. I have now been led to decide on going to +Lutterworth to see brother-—, to converse with him about accompanying +him on a journey to the Continent, with reference to Missionary +objects. When I had come to this decision, I took another ride, the +horse being well again; but now this formerly quiet horse was +self-willed and shy, which does not at all suit me in the weak state +of my nervous system. As horse exercise had kept me here longer than +I had intended to stay, and as I cannot now ride on this horse which +before suited me so well, I see, even in this, in itself, trifling +circumstance, a confirmation that I had been right in my decision to +leave Oxford. + +Feb. 16. Lutterworth. I arrived here on the evening of the 14th. I +have been decidedly worse since I have been here, and was obliged +again to have recourse to medicine. A brother having strongly +recommended me, whilst in Oxford, to go to Leamington on account of +my health, and having at the same time offered to pay my expenses +during my stay there, and being now so very unwell again, and so near +Leamington, I decided to-night upon accepting his kindness, provided +that my kind physician in Bristol had no objection. + +Feb. 17. Leamington. I left Lutterworth this morning, where I have +received much kindness. There was no inside place, and I was very +unwell; but the fear of being quite laid up at Lutterworth, and +becoming burthensome to those dear saints who had received me into +their house though a stranger to them; and having still no desirable +medical advice; and the remembrance that the Lord had graciously +enabled me, even lately, to travel outside in cold weather; induced +me to get on the coach, and I rode off in a heavy fall of snow. But +God had mercy. After eight miles ride, at Rugby, I obtained an inside +place. The rest of the way was crowned with mercies. I had a room to +myself at Southam, found a suitable dinner just ready, had an inside +place to Leamington, and was preserved by the way, though the +coachman was quite intoxicated, and drove furiously.--I had asked the +Lord to let me find a suitable and cheap lodging at Leamington, and +the first lodging I saw I took, for which I pay only ten shillings +weekly. Thus, a few minutes after my arrival, I sat comfortably at my +own fireside. How very kind of the Lord! + +Feb. 26. Yesterday and today I have suffered again in my head, though +I have been on the whole better since I have taken the Leamington +waters. But far more trying has been the internal conflict which I +have had. Grace fought against evil suggestions of one kind and +another, and prevailed; but it was a very trying season. This was +much increased by receiving neither yesterday nor today a letter from +my dear wife. Grace sought out for reasons why she had not written; +nevertheless it was a very trying season. Today I earnestly prayed to +God to send my wife to me, as I feel that by being alone, and +afflicted as I am in my bead, and thus fit for little mental +employment, Satan gets an advantage over me. + +Feb. 27. God has had mercy upon me. The sore and sharp trial, the +very bitter conflict is over.--This morning also I received a letter, +which ought to have come yesterday, and which showed me that my dear +wife had not been remiss in writing. She announced her purpose of +coming today, and God, in mercy to me, brought her safely. + +March 3. My head has been on the whole better these two weeks, than +it has been for several months; but still I am not well. I have +walked every day, for the last thirteen days, between three and four +hours a day, and by the mercy of God am able to do so, without much +fatigue. + +March 11. My health is much the same. I am pretty well, but have no +mental energy.--I have read during the last weeks once more, with as +much or more interest than ever, I. and II. of Samuel, and I. and II. +of Kings.-—I have now, after repeated prayer, come to the conclusion, +(if brother Craik, to whom I have written, sees no objection, and if +my physician thinks it would be beneficial to my health,) to +accompany brother--to Germany, that thus; 1, I might aid him by my +advice in reference to the object of his journey; 2, that thus, if +the Lord will, through the journey and the benefit of my native air, +my health might be benefited; and 3, that I might once more have an +opportunity of setting the truth before my father and brother. + +March 12. I feel quite comfortable in the prospect of going to +Germany. I trust it will prove to be as much of God, as it was shown +to have been the last time. + +March 13. I had a letter today from brother Craik, who thinks it +desirable that I should go to Germany, but my physician says that I +should not go for a month or two, for that my mind ought not to be +burdened. I am in peace, and from this I see that the Lord has made +me willing to do His and not my own will. I wrote to brother——the +result of today, and have now left it with him, whether he will wait, +or go on the 21st, as he purposes. + +March 14—20. During these days, as before, I have continued to read +the Scriptures with prayer, i. e. turning what I read into prayer, +chiefly with a reference to myself. My days generally pass away in +peace. It is a trial to me, to have to care so much about my body; +but, on the whole, the Lord gives me grace to submit patiently, yet +not always. Today I saw again my medical adviser, who wishes me to +stay another week. + +March 23, Today I received a letter from brother ----. He is not gone, +and will wait for me. I have increased assurance that I shall go to +Berlin, and have comfort in the thought. + +March 24. A few days ago I had particular comfort in meditating on +the Lord’s prayer in Luke (which came in the course of my +meditation), after having been tempted to pass it over, as it had +been the subject of my meditation a short time before.--Within the +last fortnight I have read with meditation and prayer from the 4th to +the 12th chapter of the Gospel by Luke. + +April 2. For some time I have been getting weary of my stay here. +Yesterday I pleaded especially that word Psalm ciii. 13: "Like as a +father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear Him." +I begged God to pity me, and to release me from the necessity of +staying any longer at Leamington, if it might be. Today I saw my +physician, and he has allowed me to leave. Thus the Lord has granted +my request. + +April 3. My dear Mary left for Bristol, and I for London, on my way +to Germany. I was led to read, this morning, Psalm cxxi. with my dear +wife before we separated, which we both felt to be very appropriate +to our circumstances. + +April 6. This evening I went on board the steamer for Hamburg. + +April 7. All the day ill from sea sickness. + +April 8. Lord’s day. I was able to get up this morning, and to take +my meals.--Last night I was led to praise God for having made me His +child, considering that I was most likely the only one on board that +knew Him. This morning, however, I found a sister in the Lord among +the passengers, with whom I had much conversation.--At dinner she +manifested more grace, in testifying against evil, than I did. At tea +time I had grace, in some measure, to speak of Jesus before the +company, and to confess Him as my Lord. + +April 9. We arrived at Hamburg about one in the morning, having had a +most favourable passage of about 48 hours, and at seven I went on +shore. It had been repeatedly my prayer, that I might soon find out +brother ----, who had gone three days before me to Hamburg; and +immediately after my arrival, in answer to prayer, without any +difficulty, I found out where he lodged. + +April 14. Berlin. We arrived here the evening before last. Having +been yesterday and this morning seeking for lodgings, without being +able to obtain any that were suitable, I at last became irritated. +Surely there was lack of earnest prayer on my part in this matter, +and want of patience in waiting the Lord’s own time, and want of +openness, in not telling brother ---- that I was tired, and that, on +account of my weakness, I was unable thus to go about from place to +place. At last the Lord directed us to two suitable rooms, and I feel +now again comfortable, in my quiet retirement, after having confessed +my sin of irritability to the Lord and to brother ----. + +April 15—21. We met several times during this week with certain +brethren who desire to give themselves to Missionary service, and +prayed and read the Scriptures with them, and made such remarks as +seemed to be important in connexion with the work. In addition to +this we saw the brethren privately at our lodgings, two, three, or +four at a time. But I have still felt the great weakness of my mental +powers, and have been only able to attend to this work about three +hours a day.--Since my arrival here I have had two letters from my +dear Mary. Harriet Culliford, one of the Orphans, and formerly one of +the most unpromising children, has been removed. She died as a true +believer, several of the brethren who saw her being quite satisfied +about her state. Surely this pays for much trouble and for much +expense! My wife also mentions some fresh instances of the Lord’s +blessing resting upon my Narrative.--I am now, after prayer, this day, +April 21, quite sure that I should leave Berlin, and go to my father +at once, as the work here is too much for my head. + +April 22nd. Confirmation-day of the children in Berlin. The son of +the person with whom we lodge was confirmed, and in the evening they +had the violin and dancing. How awful!—-A few days since I heard +that a brother in the Lord, an old friend of mine, and one of the two +alluded to in the first part of this Narrative, page 15, was in +prison on account of his religious views. This brought afresh before +me the privileges which the children of God enjoy in England.--I saw a +few days since another brother in prison, who, as an unconverted +young man, in the university, was once at a political club, and had +his name enrolled, in consequence of this, in the list of the +political students. Shortly afterwards he was converted, and gave up +all connexion with these political students. He finished his +university course and afterwards became a tutor to the sons of a +baron. In that family he had been for a considerable time, when one +night he was fetched by the police out of his bed and taken to +prison, on the ground of this his connexion with the political club +three or four years before. [The result was that he was for many +months in prison. Now he is a Missionary in the East Indies. I have +related this circumstance to remind the reader afresh, that though +the Lord freely and fully forgives us all our sins at once when we +believe, yet He may allow us to suffer the consequences of them in a +greater or less degree.] + +April 24. Left Berlin last evening for Magdeburg, Had a long +conversation with two deists in the mail. God helped me to make a +full confession of His dear Son, in answer to prayer for grace to be +enabled to do so. This afternoon I arrived at Heimersleben, the small +town where my father lives. Once more then I have met with my dear +aged parent, who is evidently fast hastening to the grave, and seems +to me not likely to live through the next winter. I arrived just at +the time when, the Fair was held in the town. How great, how +exceedingly great, the difference in me, as to my feelings respecting +such things now, from what they were formerly! + +April 25—28. Stay at Heimersleben. The Lord has given me both an +opportunity and grace to speak more fully, more simply, and more to +the heart of my father about the things of God, and in particular +about the plan of salvation, than I had ever done before. I trust +that, in judgment at least, he is convinced that there is something +lacking in him. All the time of my stay here he has been most +affectionate. I spoke also fully again to my poor brother, who is now +completely living in open sin. Oh to grace what a debtor am I!—-Brother +Knabe, who was the only believer in Heimersleben, as far as +I have been able to learn, died about eighteen months since. + +April 28. Today I left for Magdeburg. My father accompanied me about +eight miles. Both of us, I think, felt, when about to separate, that +we were parting from each other, never again to meet on earth. How +would it have cheered the separation on both sides, were my dear +father a believer! But it made my heart indeed sad to see him, in all +human probability, for the last time, without having Scriptural +ground for hope respecting his soul.--I arrived in the afternoon at +Magdeburg, and went to a brother, a musician in one of the regiments +of that fortress, who is on the point of leaving the army to go to +the East Indies as a Missionary. In his lodgings I saw another +brother, a private soldier, who lives in the barracks, who told me, +on my enquiring, that he goes into the sand cellar, which is +perfectly dark, in order to obtain opportunity for secret prayer. How +great the privileges of those who may freely have both time and place +for retirement; but how great, at the same time, our obligation to +improve these opportunities!-—This evening at eight I went on board +an Elbe-steamer for Hamburg. + +April 30. This morning at seven I arrived at Hamburg. Nothing +particular happened during the passage, except that we stuck fast, in +a shallow part of the river, through the carelessness of one of the +sailors; but the Lord heard prayer, and after a little while the +steamer could ply again. + +May 1. Yesterday and today I spent in an hotel at Hamburg in writing +letters. I had also, though staying at an hotel, much real communion +with God in reading the Scriptures and in prayer. This evening I +embarked for London. + +May 4. London. Left Hamburg on the 2nd. Had a fine passage. I have, +by the mercy of God, been kept from light and trifling conversation; +but I have not confessed the Lord Jesus as plainly as I ought to have +done. This afternoon I arrived at the house of my dear friends in +London, who received me with their usual kindness. After prayer I see +it my duty to leave tomorrow for Leamington, to see my physician +there once more, and then to go as soon as I can to Bristol. + +May 5. Leamington. Through the mercy of the Lord the journey to +Germany, concerning which I had prayed so often, is now over, and I +am safely brought back again to this place.--It has been a wet and +cold day, but God has in mercy preserved me from injury, though I got +wet. I had some conversation with a clergyman on the coach; I +confessed the Lord Christ a little, but not plainly enough.--I had +asked the Lord to give me a quiet and cheap resting place in my +former lodgings, if it might be, and accordingly they were unlet. + +May 7. This morning I left Leamington for Bristol. I had grace to +confess the Lord Jesus the last part of the way before several merry +passengers, and had the honour of being ridiculed for His sake. There +are few things in which I feel more entirely dependant upon the Lord, +than in confessing Him on such occasions. Sometimes I have, by grace, +had much real boldness; but often I have manifested the greatest +weakness, doing no more than refraining entirely from unholy +conversation, without, however, speaking a single word for Him who +toiled beyond measure for me. No other remedy do I know for myself +and any of my fellow-saints who are weak, like myself, in this +particular, than to seek to have the heart so full of Jesus, and to +live so in the realization of what He has done for us, that, without +any effort, out of the full heart, we may speak for Him.--I found my +dear family in peace. + +May 8. This evening I went to the prayer meeting at Gideon. I read +Psalm ciii, and was able to thank the Lord publicly for my late +affliction. This is the first time that I have taken any part in the +public meetings of the brethren, since November 6th, 1837. + +May 13. Today I was much helped in expounding the Scriptures +publicly. When I began I knew not how the Lord would deal with me, +whether I should be able to speak or not, as my head is still very +weak. But the Lord helped me. I did not feel any loss of mental +power. How gracious of the Lord to allow me again to commence serving +Him in the ministry of His word.--[For several months after this I +preached, on the whole, with much more enjoyment, and with much more +earnestness and prayerfulness, than I did before I was taken ill. I +also felt more the solemnity of the work.] + +June 11. A stranger called on me, and told me, that, many years ago, +he had defrauded two gentlemen of a small sum, and that he wished to +restore the same with interest. He also stated that he had read my +Narrative, and, feeling confidence in me, he requested me to convey +this money to those gentlemen, giving me, at the same time, their +names and place of abode. He intrusted me with four sovereigns for +each of them. At the same time he gave me one sovereign for myself, +as a token of Christian love. I never saw the individual before, nor +do I up to this moment know his name. I conveyed this money, however, +not by post, as he wished but through two bank orders, in order that +thus I might be able to show, should it be needful, that I actually +did send the money; for in all such matters it becomes one to act +with particular caution.--It may be that this fact will be read by +some who have, like this stranger, before their conversion, defrauded +certain individuals. If so, let them like him, or like Zaccheus of +old, restore what they took, and, if they have the means, with +interest, or compound interest. + +June 13. Last evening my dear wife was taken ill. Often had I prayed +respecting her hour, and now was the time to look out for the answer. +She continued in most severe sufferings from a little after nine +until midnight. Thus hour after hour passed away, until eleven this +morning. Another medical attendant was then called in, at the desire +of the one who attended her. At three in the afternoon she was +delivered of a still-born child.--The whole of the night I was in +prayer, as far as my strength allowed me. I cried at last for MERCY, +and God heard. + +June 14. My dearest wife is alive, but I am depending upon God for +her life every moment. She is in much peace. A sister gave me this +evening 5l. on account of dear Mary’s illness.--[Again we had not +thought it well to make pecuniary provision for this time, though at +no period of my life had I more abundant means of doing so than +during the last few months; but our gracious Father helped us +abundantly in this and in other instances, as I shall mention below.] + +June 22. Today there was sent to us anonymously, by post, 5l. for our +own personal expenses, at this the time of our affliction, when our +expenses are so great. The donor accompanied the 5l. note with an +affectionate letter to my wife and myself. + +July 6. My dear wife, who for more than a fortnight after her +delivery was so ill, that the two medical attendants came twice or +three times daily, seems now, humanly speaking, likely to recover, +and to be given back to me as from the dead. Lord, help me so to +receive her! + +July 12. From the commencement of the establishment of the +Orphan-houses, up to the end of June 1838, the hand of the Lord was +seen in the abundance with which He was pleased to supply me with the +means for maintaining nearly 100 persons. Now, however, the time is +come when "the Father of the fatherless" will show His especial care +over them in another way.--The funds, which were this day twelvemonth +about 780l., are now reduced to about 20l.; but, thanks be to the +Lord, my faith is as strong, or stronger, than it was when we had the +larger sum in hand; nor has He at any time, from the commencement of +the work, allowed me to distrust Him. Nevertheless, as our Lord will +be inquired of, and as real faith is manifested as such by leading to +prayer, I gave myself to prayer with brother T---- of the Boy’s +Orphan-House, who had called on me, and who, besides my wife, and +brother Craik, is the only individual to whom I speak about the state +of the funds. While we were praying, an orphan child from Frome was +brought, and some believers at Frome, having collected among them +5l., sent this money with the child. Thus we received the first +answer at a time of need. We have given notice for seven children to +come in, and purpose to give notice for five more, though our funds +are so low, hoping that God will look on our necessities. [Observe +how gently the Lord dealt with us, in that, when want approached, He +helped at once, in immediate answer to prayer, in order thus to +increase our confidence in Him; but, at the same time, to prepare us +for sharper trials of our faith.] + +June 17 and 18. These two days we have had two especial prayer +meetings, from 6 to 9 in the evening, to commend publicly to the Lord +the Boys’ Orphan-House. The meetings had been deferred until now, on +account of my illness. In the morning of the 18th I expounded, with +especial reference to children, 1 Samuel iii., before above 550 +children, being our Orphan and Day-School children, and, as many as +could come, of those belonging to the Sunday-School. What a great +work! What an honour to be allowed to provide Scriptural instruction +for so many little ones. Lord, help me to make use of my talents for +the benefit of the rising generation, and let me serve my generation +according to Thy will!-—Our funds for the Orphans are now very low. +There are about 20l. in hand, and in a few days 30l. at least will be +needed; but I purposely avoided saying any thing about our present +necessities, and spoke only, to the praise of God, about the +abundance with which our gracious Father, "The Father of the +fatherless," has hitherto supplied us. This was done in order that +the hand of God, in sending help, may be so much the more clearly +seen. + +July 22. This evening I was walking in our little garden, meditating +on Heb. xiii. 8, "Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and today, and for +ever." Whilst meditating on His unchangeable love, power, wisdom, +&c.--and turning all, as I went on, into prayer respecting myself; +and whilst applying likewise His unchangeable love, and power, and +wisdom, &c., both to my present spiritual and temporal circumstances:—-all +at once the present need of the Orphan-Houses was brought to my +mind. Immediately I was led to say to myself, Jesus in His love and +power has hitherto supplied me with what I have needed for the +Orphans, and in the same unchangeable love and power He will provide +me with what I may need for the future. A flow of joy came into my +soul whilst realizing thus the unchangeableness of our adorable Lord. +About one minute after, a letter was brought me, enclosing a bill for +20l. In it was written: "Will you apply the amount of the enclosed +bill to the furtherance of the objects of your Scriptural Knowledge +Society, or of your Orphan Establishment, or in the work and cause of +our Master in any way that He Himself, on your application to Him, +may point out to you. It is not a great sum, but it is a sufficient +provision for the exigency of today; and it is for today’s +exigencies, that, ordinarily, the Lord provides. Tomorrow, as it +brings its demands, will find its supply, etc." [Of this 20l. I took +10l. for the Orphan fund, and 10l. for the other objects, and was +thus enabled to meet the expenses of about 34l. which, in connection +with the Orphan-Houses, came upon me within four days afterwards, and +which I knew beforehand would come.] + +On July 26 sailed from Liverpool for the East Indies, for Missionary +service, twelve German brethren and three sisters, as the result of +the journey of brother ---- and myself to the Continent, in April last. + +July 27. Yesterday the funds for the Orphans were reduced to 5l. +Blessed be God, my confidence in Him was unshaken! I received +yesterday 2l. 13s. Today I was going with my family for change of air +to Durdham Down, and thought it well, therefore, to take out any +money which there might be in the Orphan-Box in my house. When I +opened it, I found a ten pound note and three half crowns. I had been +waiting on God for means, both yesterday and today, and thus He has +again shown how willing He is to help. + +Aug. 6. During this week I shall have to pay again at least 35l. for +the Orphans, and have but about 19l. towards it. My eyes are up to +the "Father of the fatherless." I believe He will help, though I knew +not how. + +Aug. 7. How graciously has the Lord again appeared, and that in so +short a time! How has he sent help, from altogether unexpected +quarters! I have been praying yesterday and today earnestly, +beseeching the Lord now to appear, and show His power, that the +enemies might not say, "Where is now thy God?" I reminded Him +especially, that I had commenced the work that it might be seen, that +He, even in our day, is willing to answer prayer, and that the +provision for our Orphans might be a visible proof to all around us +of this truth. And now observe! Last evening brother Craik told me +that 10l. had been given him for the work in our hands; 5l. for the +Orphans, and 5l. for the School—Bible—and Missionary fund. Today, +having to pay 25l., and not having quite enough, when I went to +brother T---- for the money which he might have received, as I knew that +25s. had been given to him, I took with me the keys of the boxes in +the Orphan-Houses, to see whether the Lord had sent in a little. I +opened the box in the Boys’-Orphan-House, and found 1l. 7s. 5 ½d. +Immediately after I received from brother T---- 13l. 19s. 10d., the +greater part of which, as he told me, had come in within the last few +days. Thus our adorable Lord has once more delivered; for I have now +even more than enough to meet the current expenses of this week. + +Aug. 16. When today the account books of the Boys’-Orphan-House were +brought, several days sooner than I had expected them, it was found +that there was 1l. 6s. 6d. due to the matron. Besides this, money was +to be advanced for house-keeping, and there was only 13s. 5 1/2d. in +hand. To this one of those connected with the work added 2l. This 2l. +13s. 5 1/2d. was sent to the matron, whilst we were waiting upon God +to send more help. In the evening the boxes at the Girls’ and +Infant-Orphan-Houses were opened, and in them was found 3l. 7s. 5 +1/2d. Thus the Lord has kindly helped us again for two or three days. + +Aug. 18. I have not one penny in hand for the Orphans. In a day or +two again many pounds will be needed. My eyes are up to the Lord. +Evening. Before this day is over, I have received from a sister 5l. +She had some time since put away her trinkets, to be sold for the +benefit of the Orphans. This morning, whilst in prayer, it came to +her mind, I have this 5l., and owe no man any thing, therefore it +would be better to give this money at once, as it may be some time, +before I can dispose of the trinkets. She therefore brought it, +little knowing that there was not a penny in hand, and that I had +been able to advance only 4l. l5s. 5d. for housekeeping in the +Boys’-Orphan-House, instead of the usual 10l.; little knowing also, +that within a few days many pounds more will be needed. May my soul +be greatly encouraged by this fresh token of my gracious Lord’s +faithfulness! + +Aug. 20. The 5l. which I had received on the 18th, had been given for +house-keeping, so that today I was again penniless. But my eyes were +up to the Lord. I gave myself to prayer this morning, knowing that I +should want again this week at least 13l., if not above 20l. Today I +received 12l. in answer to prayer, from a lady who is staying at +Clifton, whom I had never seen before. Adorable Lord, grant that this +may be a fresh encouragement to me. + +Aug. 23. Today I was again without one single penny, when 3l. was +sent from Clapham, with a box of new clothes for the Orphans. + +Aug. 29. Today sixteen believers were baptized. Of all the baptisms +which we have had, this was, perhaps, the most remarkable. Among +those who were baptized was an aged brother of above 84 years, and +one above 70. For the latter his believing wife had prayed 38 years, +and at last the Lord answered her prayers in his conversion. Should +any believer who may read this, be on the point of growing weary in +prayer for his unconverted relatives, because of the answer being +delayed, the above fact may be instrumental in stirring up such a one +to give himself to prayer with renewed earnestness and strengthened +expectation. "In due season we shall reap, if we faint not." There +were also amongst those who were baptized a blind brother and sister, +and two very young persons. + +Aug. 31. I have been waiting on the Lord for means, as the matron’s +books from the Girls’-Orphan-House have been brought, and there is no +money in hand to advance for house-keeping. But as yet the Lord has +not been pleased to send help. As the matron called today for money, +one of the labourers gave 2l. of his own, for the present necessities. + +Sept. 1. The Lord in His wisdom and love has not yet sent help. +Whence it is to come, need not be my care. But I believe God will, in +due time, send help. His hour is not yet come. As there was money +needed in the Boys’-Orphan-House also, the same brother, just alluded +to, gave 2l. for that also. Thus we were delivered at this time +likewise. But now his means are gone. This is the most trying hour +that as yet I have had in the work, as it regards means; but I know +that I shall yet praise the Lord for His help. I have mentioned my +arguments before Him, and my gracious Lord, "the Father of the +fatherless," will send help. + +Sept. 3. This morning the Lord again helped by 2l., which another +labourer connected with the work gave. This 2l., together with +sixpence which had been given anonymously, was sent off to the +Girls’-Orphan-House, where all the money must be gone. There came in +further 1l. 14s. 8d. in the course of the day, which was given to the +matron of the Boys’-Orphan-House. + +Sept. 5. Our hour of trial continues still. The Lord mercifully has +given enough to supply our daily necessities; but He gives by the day +now, and almost by the hour, as we need it. Nothing came in +yesterday. I have besought the Lord again and again, both yesterday +and today. It is as if the Lord said: "Mine hour is not yet come." +But I have faith in God. I believe that He surely will send help, +though I know not whence it is to come. Many pounds are needed within +a few days, and there is not a penny in hand. This morning 2l. was +given for the present necessities, by one of the labourers in the +work.--Evening: This very day the Lord sent again some help to +encourage me to continue to wait on Him, and to trust in Him. As I +was praying this afternoon respecting the matter, I felt fully +assured that the Lord would send help, and praised Him beforehand for +His help, and asked Him to encourage our hearts through it. I have +been also led yesterday and today to ask the Lord especially, that He +would not allow my faith to fail. A few minutes after I had prayed, +brother T---- came and brought 4l. 1s. 5d., which had come in, in +several small donations. He told me, at the same time, that tomorrow +the books will be brought from the Infant-Orphan-House, when money +must be advanced for housekeeping. I thought for a moment, it might +be well to keep 3l. of this money for that purpose. But it occurred +to me immediately, "Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." The +Lord can provide, by tomorrow, much more than I need, and I +therefore sent 3l. to one of the sisters, whose quarterly salary was +due, and the remaining 1l. 1s. 5d. to the Boys’-Orphan-House for +housekeeping. Thus I am still penniless. My hope is in God: He will +provide. + +Sept. 6. This morning the books were brought from the +Infant-Orphan-House, and the matron sent to ask when she should fetch +them, implying, when they would have been looked over, and when money +would be advanced for housekeeping. I said "tomorrow," though I had +not a single penny in hand. About an hour after, brother T---- sent me a +note, to say that he had received 1l. this morning, and that last +evening a brother had sent 29lbs. of salt, 44 dozen of onions, and +26lbs. of groats. + +Sept. 7. The time had come that I had to send money to the +Infant-Orphan-House, but the Lord had not sent any more. I gave, +therefore, the 1l. which had come in yesterday, and 2s. 2d. which had +been put into the box in my house, trusting to the good Lord to send +in more. + +Sept. 8. Saturday evening. I am still in the hour of probation. It +has not pleased my gracious Lord to send me help as yet.--The evening +before last I heard brother Craik preach on Genesis xii., about +Abraham’s faith. He showed how all went on well, as long as Abraham +acted in faith, and walked according to the will of God; and how all +failed when he distrusted God. Two points I felt particularly +important in my case. 1. That I may not go any by-ways, or ways of my +own, for deliverance. I have about 220l. in the bank, which, for +other purposes in the Lord’s work, has been entrusted to me by a +brother and a sister. I might take of this money, and say but to the +sister--and write but to the brother, that I have taken, in these my +straits, 20l., 50l., or 100l., for the Orphans, and they would be +quite satisfied (for both of them have liberally given for the +Orphans, and the brother has more than once told me, only to let him +know when I wanted money;) but this would be a deliverance of my own, +not God’s deliverance. Besides, it would be no small barrier to the +exercise of faith, in the next hour of trial. 2. I was particularly +reminded afresh, in hearing brother Craik, of the danger of +dishonouring the Lord in that very way in which I have, through His +grace, in some small measure brought glory to Him, even by trusting +in Him.--Yesterday and today I have been pleading with God eleven +arguments, why He would be graciously pleased to send help. My mind +has been in peace respecting the matter. Yesterday the peace amounted +even to joy in the Holy Ghost But this I must say, that the burden of +my prayer, during the last days, has been chiefly, that the Lord in +mercy would keep my faith from failing. My eyes are up to Him. He can +help soon. One thing I am sure of: In His own way, and in His own +time He will help. The arguments which I plead with God are: + +1. That I set about the work for the glory of God, i e. that there +might be a visible proof, by God supplying, in answer to prayer only, +the necessities of the Orphans, that He is the living God, and most +willing, even in our day, to answer prayer; and that, therefore, He +would be pleased to send supplies. + +2. That God is the "Father of the fatherless," and that He, +therefore, as their Father, would be pleased to provide. Psalm +lxviii. 5. + +3. That I have received the children in the name of Jesus, and that, +therefore, He, in these children, has been received, and is fed, and +is clothed; and that, therefore, He would be pleased to consider +this. Mark ix. 36, 37. + +4. That the faith of many of the children of God has been +strengthened by this work hitherto, and that, if God were to withhold +the means for the future, those who are weak in faith would be +staggered; whilst by a continuance of means, their faith might still +further be strengthened. + +5. That many enemies would laugh, were the Lord to withhold supplies, +and say, did we not foretell that this enthusiasm would come to +nothing? + +6. That many of the children of God, who are uninstructed, or in a +carnal state, would feel themselves justified to continue their +alliance with the world in the work of God, and to go on as +heretofore, in their unscriptural proceedings respecting similar +institutions, so far as the obtaining of means is concerned, if He +were not to help me. + +7. That the Lord would remember that I am His child, and that He +would graciously pity me, and remember that I cannot provide for +these children, and that therefore He would not allow this burden to +lie upon me long without sending help. + +8. That He would remember likewise my fellow-labourers in the work, +who trust in Him, but who would be tried were He to withhold supplies. + +9. That He would remember that I should have to dismiss the children +from under our Scriptural instruction to their former companions. + +10. That He would show, that those were mistaken who said, that, at +the first, supplies might be expected, while the thing was new, but +not afterwards. + +11. That I should not know, were He to withhold means, what +construction I should put upon all the many most remarkable answers +to prayer, which He had given me heretofore in connexion with this +work, and which most fully have shown to me that it is of God. + +In some small measure I now understand, experimentally, the meaning +of that word "how long," which so frequently occurs in the prayers of +the Psalms. But even now, by the grace of God, my eyes are up unto +Him only, and I believe that He will send help. + +Sept. 10. Monday morning. Neither Saturday nor yesterday had any +money come in. It appeared to me now needful to take some steps on +account of our need, i.e., to go to the Orphan Houses, call the +brethren and sisters together, (who, except brother T----, had never +been informed about the state of the funds), state the case to them, +see how much money was needed for the present, tell them that amidst +all this trial of faith I still believed that God would help, and to +pray with them. Especially, also, I meant to go for the sake of +telling them that no more articles must be purchased than we have the +means to pay for, but to let there be nothing lacking in any way to +the children, as it regards nourishing food and needful clothing; for +I would rather at once send them away than that they should lack. I +meant to go for the sake also of seeing whether there were still +articles remaining which had been sent for the purpose of being sold, +or whether there were any articles really needless, that we might +turn them into money. I felt that the matter was now come to a solemn +crisis.--About half-past nine six-pence came in, which had been put +anonymously into the box at Gideon Chapel. This money seemed to me +like an earnest, that God would have compassion and send more. About +ten, after I had returned from brother Craik, to whom I had unbosomed +my heart again, whilst once more in prayer for help, a sister called +who gave two sovereigns to my wife for the Orphans, stating that she +had felt herself stirred up to come, and that she had delayed coming +already too long. A few minutes after, when I went into the room +where she was, she gave me two sovereigns more, and all this without +knowing the least about our need. Thus the Lord most mercifully has +sent us a little help, to the great encouragement of my faith. A few +minutes after I was called on for money from the Infant-Orphan-House, +to which I sent 2l., and 1l. 0s. 6d. to the Boys’-Orphan-House, +and 1l. to the Girls’-Orphan-House. + +Brother Craik left Bristol today for a few days in company with +another brother. I should have gone with them for the sake of +obtaining some quiet for my head; but I must remain, to pass with my +dear Orphans through the trial; though these dear little ones know +nothing about it, because their tables are as well supplied as when +there was 800l. in the bank, and they have lack of nothing. + +Today I saw a young brother who, as well as one of his sisters, had +been brought to the knowledge of the Lord through my Narrative. + +Sept. 11. The good Lord, in His wisdom, still sees it needful to keep +us very low. But this afternoon brother T---- called, and told me that +one of our fellow-labourers had sold his metal watch, and two gold +pins, for 1l. 1s., that 9s. 6d. had come in, and that two of our +fellow-labourers had sent two lots of books of their own, 19 and 21 +in number, to be sold for the Orphans. What an abundant blessing, +that in such a season of trial I have such fellow-labourers! This 1l. +10s. 6d. was given to the Boys’-Orphan-House. + +Sept. 12. Still the trial continues. Only 9s. came in today, given by +one of the labourers. In the midst of this great trial of faith the +Lord still mercifully keeps me in great peace. He also allows me to +see, that our labour is not in vain; for yesterday died Leah +Culliford, one of the orphans, about 9 years old, truly converted, +and brought to the faith some months before her departure. + +Sept. 13. No help has come yet. This morning found it was absolutely +needful to tell the brethren and sisters about the state of the +funds, and to give necessary directions as to not going into debt, +etc. We prayed together, and had a very happy meeting. They all +seemed comfortable 12s. 6d. was taken out of the boxes in the three +houses, 12s. one of the labourers gave, and 1l. 1s. had come in for +needlework done by the children. + +One of the sisters, who is engaged in the work, sent a message after +me, not to trouble myself about her salary, for she should not want +any for a twelvemonth. What a blessing to have such fellow-labourers! + +Sept. 14. I met again this morning with the brethren and sisters for +prayer, as the Lord has not yet sent help. After prayer one of the +labourers gave me all the money he had, 16s., saying that it would +not be upright to pray, if he were not to give what he had. One of +the sisters told me, that in six days she would give 6l., which she +had in the Savings’ Bank for such a time of need. God be praised for +such fellow-labourers!-—Up to this day the matrons of the three +houses had been in the habit of paying the bakers and the milkman +weekly, because they had preferred to receive the payments in this +way, and sometimes it had thus been also with the butcher and grocer. +But now, as the Lord deals out to us by the day, we considered it +would be wrong to go on any longer in this way, as the week’s payment +might become due, and we have no money to meet it; and thus those +with whom we deal might be inconvenienced by us, and we be found +acting against the commandment of the Lord, "Owe no man anything." +Rom. xiii. 8. From this day, and hence-forward, whilst the Lord gives +to us our supplies by the day, we purpose therefore to pay at once +for every article as it is purchased, and never to buy anything +except we can pay for it at once, however much it may seem to be +needed, and however much those with whom we deal may wish to be paid +only by the week. The little which was owed was paid off this day.--When +I came home I found a large parcel of new clothes, which had +been sent from Dublin for the Orphans, a proof that tire Lord +remembers us still. We met again in the evening for prayer. We were +of good cheer, and still BELIEVE that the Lord will supply our need. + +Sept. 15. Saturday. We met again this morning for prayer. God +comforts our hearts. We are looking for help. I found that there were +provisions enough for today and tomorrow, but there was no money in +hand to take in bread as usual, in order that the children might not +have newly baked bread. This afternoon one of the labourers, who had +been absent for several days from Bristol, returned, and gave 1l. +This evening we met again for prayer, when I found that 10s. 6d. more +had come in since the morning. With this 1l. 10s. 6d. we were able to +buy, even this Saturday evening, the usual quantity of bread, (as it +might be difficult to get stale bread on Monday morning,) and have +some money left. God be praised, who gave us grace to come to the +decision not to take any bread today, as usual, nor to buy any thing +for which we cannot pay at once. We were very comfortable, thankfully +taking this money out of our Father’s hands, as a proof that He still +cares for us, and that, in His own time, He will send us larger sums. + +Today, a brother kindly paid the bill for medical attendance on my +dear wife during her confinement. The same brother also had paid, +some weeks since, the second medical attendant, who was called in. +Thus the Lord, in various ways, sends help to us, showing continually +His fatherly care over us. + +Sept. 16. Lord’s day afternoon. We met again for prayer respecting +supplies for the Orphans. We are in peace, and our hope is in God, +that He graciously will appear, though but one shilling has come in +since last evening. + +Sept. 17. The trial still continues. It is now more and more trying, +even to faith, as each day comes. Truly, the Lord has wise purposes +in allowing us to call so long upon Him for help. But I am sure God +will send help, if we can but wait. One of the labourers had had a +little money come in, of which he gave 12s. 6d.; another labourer +gave 11s. 8d., being all the money she had left: this, with 17s. 6d., +which, partly, had come in, and, partly, was in hand, enabled us to +pay what needed to be paid, and to purchase provisions, so that +nothing yet, in any way, has been lacking. This evening I was rather +tried respecting the long delay of larger sums coming; but being led +to go to the Scriptures for comfort, my soul was greatly refreshed, +and my faith again strengthened, by the xxxivth Psalm, so that I went +very cheerfully to meet with my dear fellow-labourers for prayer. I +read to them the Psalm, and sought to cheer their hearts through the +precious promises contained in it. + +Sept. 18. Brother T. had 25s. in hand, and I had 3s. This 1l. 8s. +enabled us to buy the meat and bread, which was needed; a little tea +for one of the houses, and milk for all; no more than this is needed. +Thus the Lord has provided not only for this day, but there is bread +for two days in hand. Now, however, we are come to an extremity. The +funds are exhausted. The labourers, who had a little money, have +given as long as they had any left.--Now observe how the Lord helped +us! A lady from the neighbourhood of London who brought a parcel with +money from her daughter, arrived four or five days since in Bristol, +and took lodgings next door to the Boys’ Orphan-House. This afternoon +she herself kindly brought me the money, amounting to 3l. 2s. 6d. We +had been reduced so low as to be on the point of selling those things +which could be spared; but this morning I had asked the Lord, if it +might be, to prevent the necessity of our doing so. That the money +had been so near the Orphan-Houses for several days without being +given, is a plain proof that it was from the beginning in the heart +of God to help us; but, because He delights in the prayers of His +children, He had allowed us to pray so long; also to try our faith, +and to make the answer so much the sweeter. It is indeed a precious +deliverance. I burst out into loud praises and thanks the first +moment I was alone, after I had received the money. I met with my +fellow-labourers again this evening for prayer and praise; their +hearts were not a little cheered. This money was this evening +divided, and will comfortably provide for all that will be needed +tomorrow. + +Sept. 20. Morning. The Lord has again kindly sent in a little. Last +evening was given to me 1s. 6d., and this morning 1l. 3s. Evening. +This evening the Lord sent still further supplies; 8l. 11s. 2 1/2d. +came in, as a further proof that the Lord is not unmindful of us. +There was in the box of the Girls’ Orphan-House 1l. 1s., and in that +of the Boys’ Orphan-House 1l. 7s. 2 1/2d. One of the labourers, in +accordance with her promise this day week, gave 6l. 3s. About +eighteen months ago she saw it right no longer to have money for +herself in the Savings’ Bank, and she therefore, in her heart, gave +the money which she had there to the Orphan-Houses, intending to draw +it in a time of need. Some time since (she told me this evening) she +drew a part of it to buy several useful articles for the +Orphan-Houses; now the sum was reduced to 6l. When she found out the +present need, she went this day week to the Savings’ Bank, and gave +notice that she wished to draw her money today. Truly, as long as God +shall be pleased to give me such fellow-labourers, His blessing will +rest upon the work! This 8l. 11s. 2 1/2d. was divided this evening to +supply the three houses, and we thanked God, unitedly, for His help. + +Sept. 22. Both yesterday and today we have again assembled for prayer +and praise. We are in no immediate want, but on the 29th 19l. 10s. +will be due for the rent of the three Orphan-Houses.--Today there was +only 4s. 7d. in hand for the other objects of the Institution, though +it was the pay-day for some of the teachers. My comfort was the +living God. During this week He had helped me so repeatedly and in +such a remarkable way, as it regards the Orphan-Houses, that it would +have been doubly sinful not to have trusted in Him for help under +this fresh difficulty. No money came in this morning. About two, the +usual time when the teachers are paid, a sovereign was given, with +which I went immediately to brother T. (who attends to this part of +the work), to pay at least in part, the weekly salaries. I found that +he had received a sovereign in the morning. By means of this +sovereign, together with the one which I had received just at the +moment when it was needed, we were helped through this day. + +Sept. 25. Yesterday and the previous days we have continued to +assemble for prayer. In four days the rent for the Orphan-Houses will +be due, and we have nothing towards it; also, the housekeeping money +in the three houses is now again gone. May the Lord have compassion +on us, and continue to send us help! A little came in this morning: +there was found 9s. 6d. in the box in my house. + +Sept. 27. The 9s. 6d. which came in the day before yesterday, was +given to the Infant-Orphan-House. Thus we were helped through that +day and yesterday. There was every thing that was needed in the +three houses; I had made particular enquiry; there was meat even for +today. We met yesterday again for prayer. Today I was not able to go, +on account of indisposition; I sent, therefore, to brother T. to +request him to divide the l8s. 6d., (10s. of which had come in last +evening, and 8s. 6d. of which we had in hand), between the three +matrons. This afternoon I hear of a fresh deliverance which the Lord +has wrought. About five weeks ago, a farmer applied for the admission +of an orphan-girl, his grand-daughter. As I knew, however, that he +had the means of providing for her, and as our Institution is only +for destitute orphans, I informed him that the child could only be +received, on condition of his paying 10l. a year for her support, +(which is about the average expense for the younger girls), and this, +quarterly, in advance.4 This morning he came, brought the child, and +paid 2l. 10s. in advance, and gave 1l. besides. Thus the Lord has +again most seasonably helped us in this our time of need. May He keep +the memory of these deliverances alive in our souls, and increase our +confidence in Him by every fresh one! In less than two days we have +to pay 19l. 10s. for rent! May the Lord keep us looking to Him, and +mercifully send help! + +Sept. 29. Saturday evening. Prayer has been made for several days +past respecting the rent, which is due this day. I have been looking +out for it, though I knew not whence a shilling was to come. This +morning brother T. called on me, and, as no money had come in, we +prayed together, and continued in supplication from ten till a +quarter to twelve. Twelve o’clock struck (the time when the rent +ought to have been paid), but no money had been sent. For some days +past I have repeatedly had a misgiving, whether the Lord might not +disappoint us, in order that we might be led to provide by the week, +or the day, for the rent. This is the second, and only the second, +complete failure as to answers of prayer in the work, during the past +four years and six months. The first was about the half-yearly rent +of Castle-Green school-room, due July 1, 1837, which had come in only +in part by that time. I am now fully convinced that the rent ought to +be put by daily or weekly, as God may prosper us, in order that the +work, even as to this point, may be a testimony. May the Lord, then, +help us to act accordingly; and may He now mercifully send in the +means to pay the rent!--Whilst in this matter our prayers have +failed, either to humble us, or to show us how weak our faith is +still, or to teach us, (which seems to me the most probable,) that we +ought to provide the rent beforehand; the Lord has given us again +fresh proofs, even this day, that He is mindful of us. There was not +money enough in the Girls’-Orphan-House to take in bread, (we give +the bread to the children on the third day after it is baked); but +before the baker came, a lady called who had had some needlework done +by the children, and paid 3s. 11d., and thus the matron was able to +take in bread as usual. I found this morning 2s. in the box in my +house, our extremity having led me to look into it. One of the +labourers gave 13s. This 15s. was divided amongst the three matrons. +Thanks to the Lord, there is all which is needed for today and +tomorrow. + +Sept. 30. We are not only poor as regards the Orphan-fund, but also +the funds for the other objects bring us again and again to the Lord +for fresh supplies. Today, when we had not a single penny in hand, +5l. was given for the other objects. + +Oct. 2. Tuesday evening. The Lord’s holy name be praised! He hath +dealt most bountifully with us during the last three days! The day +before yesterday 5l. came in for the Orphans. Of this I gave to each +house 10s. which supplied them before the provisions were consumed. +Oh! how kind is the Lord. Always, before there has been actual want, +He has sent help. Yesterday came in 1l. 10s. more. This 1l. 10s., +with 4s. 2d. in hand, was divided for present necessities. Thus the +expenses of yesterday, for housekeeping, were defrayed. The Lord +helped me also to pay yesterday the 19l. 10s. for the rent. The means +for it were thus obtained. One of the labourers had received through +his family 10l., and 5l. besides from a sister in the Lord; also some +other money. Of this he gave 16l., which, with the 3l. 10s. that was +left of the above-mentioned 5l., which came in the day before +yesterday, made up 19l. 10s., the sum which was needed. + +--This day we were again greatly reduced. There was no money in hand +to take in bread as usual, for the Boys’ and Infant Orphan-Houses, +but again the Lord helped. A sister who had arrived this afternoon +from Swansea brought 1l. 7s., and one of the labourers sold an +article, by means of which he was able to give 1l. 13s. Thus we had +3l.:—-1l. for each house, and could buy bread before the day was +over. Hitherto we have lacked nothing! + +Oct. 4. Thursday. The money of Tuesday helped us through yesterday. +Today, when again all was gone, and help was greatly needed, our +loving Lord appeared. The books which had been given some time since, +by some of my fellow-labourers, were sold for 11s., also an old +bedstead for 2s. 6d., and an old sofa for 10s. The boxes were also +opened, as I had been told some money had been put in, and 9s. 1d. +was found in them. This money was a fresh encouragement to us in our +need. By this 1l. 12s. 7d. we were helped through the day. + +Oct. 5. This morning, just before I was going to the Orphan-Houses to +meet with the brethren and sisters for prayer, 1l. 3s. was brought +from Teignmouth. This money seems to have been given some months +since to a brother at Teignmouth, but it did not reach me until +today. It is a most seasonable help, to defray the expenses of this +day, and a fresh proof, that not in anger, but only for the trial of +our faith, our gracious Lord delays as yet, to send larger sums. + +Oct. 6. Saturday. The Lord has again most kindly helped us. It came +to my mind that there were some new blankets in the Orphan-Houses, +which had been given some time since, but which are not needed, and +might therefore be sold. I was confirmed in this by finding that the +moth had got into one pair. I therefore sold ten pairs, having a good +opportunity to do so. Thus the Lord not only supplied again our +present need for the three houses, but I was also able to put by the +rent for this week and the next, acting out the light which He had +given us this day week. There came in 9s. 6d., besides 7l. for the +blankets. The School fund, also, was again completely exhausted, when +today and yesterday came in so much, that not only the weekly +salaries could be paid today, but also above 1l. could be put by for +rent. + +Oct. 9. Through the last-mentioned supplies for the Orphans we were +helped up to this day; but today we were brought lower than ever. The +provisions would have lasted out only today, and the money for milk +in one of the houses could only be made up by one of the labourers +selling one of his books. The matron in the Boys’-Orphan-House had +this morning two shillings left. When in doubt whether to buy bread +with it, or more meat, to make up the dinner with the meat which she +had in the house, the baker called, and left three quarterns of bread +as a present. In this great need, some money having been given to one +of the labourers, he gave 2l. of it, by which we were able to buy +meat, bread, and other provisions. Nevertheless even this day, low as +we had been brought, before this 2l. was given, there had been all in +the house that was needed. + +Oct. 10. The Lord had sent in so much since yesterday afternoon, that +we were able at our meeting this morning to divide 2l. 0s. 2d. +between the three matrons, whereby we are helped through this day. +But now the coals in the Infant-Orphan-House are out, and nearly so +in the other two houses. Also the treacle casks in all the three +houses are nearly empty. On this account we have asked the Lord for +fresh supplies. + +Oct. 11. The "Father of the fatherless" has again shown his care over +us. An Orphan from Devonshire arrived last evening. With her was sent +2l. 5s. 6d. The sister who brought her gave also a silver tea-pot, +sugar-basin, and cream jug (of the weight of 48 oz.), having found +true riches in Christ. There was also in the boxes 9s. One of the +labourers paid for a ton of coals. We obtained 16l. 16s. for the +silver articles.--Thus we were helped through the heavy expenses of +the following days. + +Oct. 12. Today seven brethren and sisters were added to us in +fellowship, and eight were proposed. May the Lord send helpers for +the work! + +Oct. 13. For three months past the Orphan fund has been low, yet +hitherto we have lacked nothing! + +Oct. 15. I knew that there would be money needed this morning, for +many things in the Orphan-Houses, and my heart was therefore lifted +up to the Lord. Just when I was going to meet my fellow labourers for +prayer, I received from Trowbridge 4l. There had come in also at the +Orphan-Houses 7s. 3d. To this one of the labourers added 1l. Thus I +was enabled abundantly to supply all that was wanted, and to pay for +a cask of treacle and a ton of coals. We are now, however, cast again +on the love of our Lord for further supplies, as there is neither any +thing in hand, nor have the labourers any more of their own to give. + +Oct. 16. The day commenced with mercies. I was looking up to the Lord +for help, early this morning, when, almost immediately afterwards, +brother T. came, and brought two silver table-spoons, and six +tea-spoons, which had been left, anonymously, yesterday afternoon, at +the Girls’-Orphan-House. This afternoon I received 12l. from +Staffordshire. On the seal of the letter, which enclosed the money, +was "Ebenezer." How true in our case! Surely this instance is a fresh +"Ebenezer" to us; for hitherto the Lord has helped us.--There was also +found a half sovereign in the box at my house. Also a lady left 5s. +at the door of the Girls’-Orphan-House, with about 200 pears for the +children; and a brother sent 2s., the first fruits of the increase of +his wages. Thus I was able to give a larger supply than usual to the +matrons. + +Oct. 22. Today our funds were again quite low. In the +Infant-Orphan-House only 2d. was left, and very little in the other +two houses. But the Lord most manifestly again answered prayer. A +gentleman from London, who is greatly interested about destitute and +neglected children, came over from Bath with two of his sisters to +see the Orphan-Houses. He gave 1l. There was 2s. 6d. put into the box +at my house, and 6d. anonymously into the box at Gideon Chapel. With +this 1l. 3s. I went directly to the Orphan-Houses to relieve the +present need. Whilst I was there, the Lord gave still further +supplies; for being informed that in the morning some ladies had seen +the houses, and put money into the boxes, I opened them and found 3l. +0s. ld. Thus the Lord, by means of this 4l. 3s. 1d., helped us +through the necessities of this day. + +Oct. 23. The Lord again sent above 2l., which supplied this day’s +necessities. + +Oct. 24. Today the Lord sent from a most unexpected quarter 5l. The +money was given by a relative of two children in the Boys’-Orphan-House. +Thus we are helped for two days, and are able to put by the rent +for this week. + +Oct. 27. Saturday. This day we have been again mercifully helped, +though our need has been almost greater than ever. But, thanks to our +adorable Lord! this day also we have not been confounded; for there +was 6s. in the box at the Infant-Orphan-House, and 6s. came in for +things which had been given to be sold. To this one of the labourers +added 18s. By means of this 1l. 10s. we have been able to meet all +pressing demands, and to procure provisions for today and tomorrow. + +Oct. 29. Monday. The Lord has again given us this day our daily +bread, though, in the morning, there was not the least natural +prospect of obtaining supplies. One of the labourers, who had +received some money for his own personal expenses, gave 2l. Some +things also, which had been given for sale, had been sold for 18s.; +and 6d. had been put into the box at Gideon Chapel This 2l. 18s. 6d. +enabled us to meet the expenses of this day. There were also many +articles of worn clothes sent. + +Oct. 30. This has been again a day of peculiar mercies in reference +to the funds. Whilst I was in prayer respecting them, a brother +brought 2 1/4 yards of cloth. He had bought it for himself, but, +afterwards considering that he had sufficient clothes, he gave it to +be sold for the Orphans. This evening a sister gave me 20l., ten of +which were for the Orphans, and ten for the other objects. Thus we +are helped for this week. + +Nov. 4. Lord’s day. There was given, by a stranger, last Wednesday +evening, at Bethesda Chapel, to one of the sisters, a sovereign for +the Orphans, which I received today. Thus the Lord has again begun +the week with mercy, and His love surely will help us through it, +though again many pounds will be needed. + +Nov. 5. Monday. By means of the sovereign which had come in +yesterday, and several small donations today and on the past days, +together with 2l. 10s. which one of the labourers added of his own, +6l. 2s. 6d. was divided this day between the three matrons, which +will supply their need for two days at least. + +Nov. 7. The funds are now again completely exhausted. Today I divided +1l. 3s. 8d., which had come in yesterday; thus the necessary wants +were supplied. The Lord be praised who has helped us hitherto! One of +the Orphans was sent today to service, and the Lord enabled us to +give her a suitable outfit. + +Nov. 8. Last evening 1l. 4s. came in, which, being divided between +the three houses, helped us through this day. + +Nov. 10. Saturday. All seemed to be dark, so far as regards natural +appearances, at the commencement of this day. But through this day +also the Lord has helped us, and enabled us to meet all demands. In +the course of the day came in 1l. 8s. 6d. To this two of the +labourers added 10s. each, and thus we were brought to the close of +one more week, having been able to supply the necessities of 97 +persons in the Orphan-Houses, without owing any thing. + +Nov. 12. Monday. Sixpence came in this morning, to which one of the +labourers added 10s. 6d., to meet the most pressing necessities. This +evening I found the 1l. was not enough to take in bread for the +Boys’-Orphan-House. The Lord gave us, however, before the day was +over, enough to buy the usual quantity of bread; for there was found +in the boxes 5s. 9d. and a pair of small gold earrings. + +Nov. 13. This morning our want was again great. I have 20l. in hand +which has been put by for rent, but, for the Lord’s honour, I would +not take of it. Nothing had come in, and the labourers had scarcely +any thing to give. I went, however, to the Orphan-Houses, to pray +with my fellow labourers, and, if it might be, to comfort them, and +see what could be done. When I came there, I found that 19s. 6d. had +come in this morning. On enquiry I heard that only 2s. 6d. more was +needed to carry us through the day. This one of the labourers was +able to add of his own. Thus the Lord has again helped us out of our +difficulty. One of the labourers gave some things which he could do +without, and another gave a workbox to be sold for the Orphans.--Before +this day has come to an end, the Lord has sent in 1l. 2s. 4d. more, so +that we have also a little for tomorrow. + +Nov. 15. The money which had come in the day before yesterday, +supplied the necessities of yesterday also; but today we were brought +again very low. I went to the Orphan-Houses, to pray with my +fellow-labourers, not without hope that the Lord might have appeared, +and sent a little help. When I arrived I found that one of the +labourers had sold a few of his books, together with two which had +been given by another labourer on the 13th, for which he had received +7s. To this one of the labourers added 7s. 9d. This 14s. 9d. supplied +the most pressing necessities. When I came home I found 1s. in the +box at my house, and soon after received 5s. for a pair of fire +screens, which had been given for sale. There were also three baskets +of potatoes sent to the three different houses. A sack of potatoes +had been ordered, but the brother, who had been desired to bring +them, could not conveniently do so today, and thought, as this +present had been ordered from him, there would be no immediate need +of them; and Oh! how kind of the Lord to order it thus: for had he +brought them, the payment would have taken away the money which was +intended for the usual quantity of bread. But before the day was +over, the Lord helped still further. In the afternoon a gentleman +from Bath called at the Boys’-Orphan-House, and gave a cheque for 3l. +There was also 1s. given; 2s. 6d. came in for needle-work, and 5s. +6d. for things sold. Thus altogether 4l. 4s. 9d. has been sent by the +Lord this day. + +Nov. 17. Saturday. Today above 3l. was needed, and as only 15s. 6d. +had come in, we found it needful to determine to dispose of a few +articles of furniture which we conveniently could do without. One of +the labourers gave a good watch to be sold, which she had bought some +months since, there being then no time-piece in one of the houses. In +consideration of these articles to be sold, I took, for the present +necessities of the Orphans, 2l. 10s. of the money which had been put +by for the rent, to be replaced when these articles could be sold at +a suitable opportunity. Thus we were helped to the close of one more +week. + +Nov. 19. Today we were again in great need. There had come in only +7s. 6d. for needle-work. The Lord had, however, given to one of the +labourers a little money, of which he gave 15s., by means of which we +were helped through this day also. + +Nov. 20. Today our need was exceedingly great, but the Lord’s help +was great also. I went to meet with the brethren and sisters as +usual. I found that 1l. would be needed to supply the necessities of +today, but 3s. only had come in. Just when we were going to pray, one +of the labourers came in, who, after prayer, gave 10s. Whilst we were +praying, another labourer came in, who had received 1l. Thus we had +1l. 13s.; even more, therefore, than was absolutely needed. + +Nov. 21. Never were we so reduced in funds as today. There was not a +single halfpenny in hand between the matrons of the three houses. +Nevertheless there was a good dinner, and, by managing so as to help +one another with bread, etc., there was a prospect of getting over +this day also; but for none of the houses had we the prospect of +being able to take in bread. When I left the brethren and sisters at +one o’clock, after prayer, I told them that we must wait for help, +and see how the Lord would deliver us at this time. I was sure of +help, but we were indeed straitened. When I came to Kingsdown, I felt +that I needed more exercise, being very cold; wherefore I went not +the nearest way home, but round by Clarenceplace. About twenty yards +from my house, I met a brother who walked back with me, and after a +little conversation gave me 10l. to be handed over to the brethren, +the deacons, towards providing the poor saints with coals, blankets +and warm clothing; also 5l. for the Orphans, and 5l. for the other +objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. The brother had +called twice while I was gone to the Orphan-Houses, and had I now +been one half minute later, I should have missed him. But the Lord +knew our need, and therefore allowed me to meet him. I sent off the +5l. immediately to the matrons. + +Nov. 23. The above-mentioned 5l., with an addition of 11s. 6d. which +had also come in, helped us through the expenses of yesterday and +today. + +Nov. 24. This again has been a very remarkable day. We had as little +in hand this morning as at any time, and yet several pounds were +needed. But God, who is rich in mercy, and whose word so positively +declares that none who trust in Him shall be confounded, has helped +us through this day also. While I was in prayer, about ten in the +morning, respecting the funds, I was informed that a gentleman had +called to see me. He came to inform me that a lady had ordered three +sacks of potatoes to be sent to the Orphan Houses. Never could they +have come more seasonably. This was an encouragement to me, to +continue to expect help. When I came to the prayer meeting about 12 +o’clock, I heard that 2s. had come in, also 1l. for a guitar, which +had been given for sale. The payment for this guitar had been +expected for many weeks. It had been mentioned among us, repeatedly, +that it might come just at a time, when we most needed it: and oh! +how true. Also the watch which had been given was sold for 2l. 10s. +But with all this we could not have put by the rents for this week, +amounting to 30s. One of the labourers, therefore, gave his watch to +the Orphan-fund under this condition, that should the Lord not enable +us before Dec. 21st to make up this deficiency, it should be sold, +but not otherwise, as he needs it in the Lord’s service.--[A few days +after the Lord gave the means to put by the 30s., and 30s. besides +for the next week’s rent.] Thus the Lord helped us through this day, +and with it brought us to the close of one more week. + +Nov. 25. Lord’s-day. The Lord kindly remembers us before there is +absolute need. A sister who is going to leave Bristol, called on me +to bid me farewell, and gave me, in parting, 1l. 10s. for the +Orphans. It is remarkable, that almost every donation given within +the last four months and thirteen days, since our funds have been +low, has come from unexpected quarters, to make the hand of God so +much the more manifest. + +Nov. 26. Though there had come in yesterday 1l. 10s., yet that was +scarcely the half of what was needed this day. But the Lord knew our +circumstances, and, as He is wont to do, most unworthy as we are of +it, remembered our need. There was given 1l. this morning, and 1s. +had been put anonymously into the box at Gideon Chapel; and a lamp, +which had been given some time since, had been sold for 10s. Also 1s. +2d. came in for needlework. By means of these several little sums we +could meet all the demands of this day. + +Nov. 27. Yesterday afternoon came in 10s., and this morning, by the +disposal of some articles, which had been given for sale, 12s. This +furnished us with means to procure, for this day also, the necessary +supplies. + +Nov. 28. This is, perhaps, of all days the most remarkable as yet, so +far as it regards the funds. When I was in prayer this morning +respecting them, I was enabled firmly to believe that the Lord would +send help, though all seemed dark as to natural appearances. At 12 +o’clock I met as usual with the brethren and sisters for prayer. +There had come in only 1s., which was left last evening anonymously, +at the Infant Orphan-House, and which, except 2d., had already been +spent, on account of the great need. I heard also that an individual +had gratuitously cleaned the time-piece in the Infant Orphan-House, +and had offered to keep the timepieces of the three houses in repair. +Thus the Lord gave even in this a little encouragement, and a proof +that He is still mindful of us. On inquiry I found that there was +every thing needful for the dinner in all the three houses; but +neither in the Infant nor Boys’ Orphan-Houses was there bread enough +for tea, nor money to buy milk. Lower we had never been, and, +perhaps, never so low. We gave ourselves now unitedly to prayer, +laying the case in simplicity before the Lord. Whilst in prayer there +was a knock at the door, and one of the sisters went out. After the +two brethren, who labour in the Orphan-Houses, and I had prayed +aloud, we continued for a while silently in prayer. As to myself, I +was lifting up my heart to the Lord to make a way for our escape, and +in order to know, if there were any other thing which I could do with +a good conscience, besides waiting on Him, so that we might have food +for the children. At last we rose from our knees. I said, "God will +surely send help." The words had not quite passed over my lips, when +I perceived a letter lying on the table, which had been brought +whilst we were in prayer. It was from my wife, containing another +letter from a brother with 10l. for the Orphans. The evening before +last I was asked by a brother whether the balance in hand for the +Orphans would be as great this time, when the accounts would be made +up, as the last time. My answer was, that it would be as great as the +Lord pleased. The next morning this brother was moved to remember the +Orphans, and to send today 10l., which arrived after I had left my +house, and which on account of our need was forwarded immediately to +me. Thus I was enabled to give 6l. 10s. for housekeeping, and to put +by 3l. 10s. for rent. + +The brother who sent the 10l. for the Orphans, sent likewise 10l. to +be divided between brother Craik and me, with the object of +purchasing new clothes for ourselves. + +Nov. 29. The Lord has greatly blessed our meetings for prayer. They +have been instrumental in leading us to much prayer for the children +in the Orphan-Houses, in the Day-Schools, and in the Sunday-School. +They have led us to prayer for ourselves, for the Day-School +Teachers, and for the Sunday-School Teachers, that grace may be given +to us so to walk before the children, and so to deal with them, as +that the Lord may be glorified by us. We have also often been led to +intercede for the believers with whom we are in fellowship, and for +the Church at large. We have especially prayed, that our work may +lead the church generally to a more simple confidence and trust in +the Lord. That these meetings have not been in vain, as regards the +procuring of funds, has been already sufficiently seen by the many +instances which have been recorded in the foregoing pages. Today, +however, we have had another particular proof of this. When we met I +found that 10s. had come in yesterday afternoon. When I returned home +I found 1l. had come in, and shortly after I received another 1l. In +the evening I received 50l., which was sent from Suffolk by a sister +who had often expressed how gladly she would contribute more largely +to the work which is in our hands, had she the means, and who just +now, in this our time of need, has obtained the means to carry out +the desire of her heart. I rejoice in the last donation particularly, +not because of the largeness of the sum, but because it enables me to +pay to my brethren and sisters in the Orphan-Houses the salary which +is due to them. For though they are willing to labour without any +remuneration, nevertheless "the labourer is worthy of his reward." +This donation also proves, that the Lord is willing even now, as +formerly, to send large sums. But I expect still larger. The same +sister who sent the 50l. for the Orphans, sent, at the same time, +30l. to be divided between brother Craik and me for our personal +expenses. How abundantly does the Lord care for us! Truly we serve a +kind Master! + +Dec. 5. Today there were again a few shillings needed, in the Boys’ +Orphan-House. That which remained of the £50l. had been divided for +housekeeping in the three houses, and was now all spent in the Boys’ +Orphan-House, and nearly also in the other two houses. The few +shillings which were needed in the Boys’ Orphan-House, the Lord, +however, had previously provided by the little which had come in on +December 3 and 4. + +Dec. 6. This day our need was again as great as ever, but the +deliverance of the Lord was also as manifest as ever. No money had +come in, and I knew there would be some needed this morning in all +the three houses. That which was required to buy provisions for +today, was about 1l.; but there were also coals needed in two +houses, and two of the treacle-casks were empty. We gave ourselves, +as usual, to prayer. After prayer one of the labourers gave 1l. of +the salary which she had received a few days ago; another gave 6s., +and 4s. 6d. was taken out of the boxes. Thus we had 1l. 10s. 6d. to +divide, and therefore more than was absolutely needed; also one of +the labourers had ordered half a ton of coals to be sent to the Boys’ +Orphan-House, for which he paid himself. + +This afternoon I received 100l. from a sister; 50l. for the Orphans, +and 50l. for the School—Bible—and Missionary-Fund. This same sister, +who earns her bread with her own hands, had given, on October 5, +1837, 50l. towards the Boys’ Orphan-House, and gave for the +necessities of the poor saints, in August, 1838, 100l. more; for she +had been made willing to act out those precious exhortations: "Having +food and raiment let us be therewith content." "Sell that ye have, +and give alms; provide yourselves bags which wax not old, a treasure +in the heavens that faileth not, where no thief approacheth, neither +moth corrupteth." "Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, +where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and +steal: but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither +moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through +nor steal." Respecting the 50l. which has been given of this sum for +the School—Bible—and Missionary-Fund, it is worthy of remark, that we +would not order Reference Bibles till we had the means. We had +repeatedly prayed respecting this want of Bibles, and particularly +again this morning. It had been also much laid on our hearts today, +to request that the Lord would enable us to have the Report printed, +which we could not do, unless He first sent the means. Lastly, we had +also repeatedly asked Him to supply us so largely, if it were His +will, as that at the time of the public meetings we might be able to +speak again of abundance. For though for some months past the time +has been fixed for the public meetings, without any reference to the +state of the funds, nevertheless, it might have had the appearance, +that we had convened the brethren for the sake of telling them about +our poverty, and thus to induce them to give. + +Dec. 8, 1838. The Lord closes the third year of this part of the work +with blessings. Yesterday was sent 24 yards of flannel, and today +were taken out of the box in the Boys’ Orphan-House a 5l. note and +3d. Also 2s. was given, and 1l. besides. + +Dec. 11, 12, and 13. On the evenings of these three days there were +public meetings, at which I gave an account of the Lord’s dealing +with us in reference to the Orphan-Houses and the other objects of +the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. As the work, and particularly +that of the Orphan-Houses, was begun for the benefit of the church at +large, it appeared well to us, that from time to time it should be +publicly stated how the Lord had dealt with us in reference to it; +and as on Dec. 9th the third year had been completed, since the +commencement of the Orphan work, this seemed to be a suitable time +for having these meetings. + +Should any one suppose, in reading the plain details of the trials +through which we passed during the four months previous to Dec. 9, +1838, respecting the Orphan-Houses, that I have been disappointed as +it regards my expectations, as far as the funds are concerned: my +answer is, that the reverse is the case. For straits were expected. +Long before the trials came, I had more than once stated publicly, +that answers to prayer, in the time of need,--the manifestation of +the hand of God, stretched out for our help,--was just the very end +for which the Institution was established. + +I further state, that the Orphans have never lacked any thing. Had I +had thousands of pounds in hand, they would have fared no better than +they have; for they have always had good nourishing food, the +necessary articles of clothing, etc. + +It is now (namely on Dec. 10, 1838) four years and nine months since +brother Craik and I established the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. +The reasons which we had for doing so were, that thus a testimony +might be borne that the children of God need not to go to unbelievers +to ask them for money; nor require the patronage of the great men of +this world in the Lord’s work; and that, further, believers generally +might be stirred up, to renounce their alliance with the world in the +management and promotion of religious objects, and that, lastly, it +might be seen, that, without contracting debts, such objects can be +carried on. + +Painful as it was, and as it still is, to us, to be obliged to differ +from so many of our brethren, in these particulars, nevertheless we +were called upon to work without them, if we could not conscientiously +work with them. May the Lord grant, that the eyes of many of His children +may be opened, so that they may seek, in all spiritual things, to be +separated from unbelievers, (2 Cor. vi. 14—18), and to do God’s work +according to God’s mind! + +I notice briefly the following particulars respecting the first three +objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. 1. There is at +present (in December, 1838) a Sunday School supported by it, which +contains four hundred and sixty-three children. This part of the work +calls for particular thanksgiving; for during these last eighteen +months the number of the children has been nearly three times as +great as it used to be. Five of the scholars have been converted +within the last two years, and are now in fellowship with the church, +and three of them are teachers in the school. 2. There is in +connection with the Institution an Adult-school, in which, since the +commencement of the work, above 120 adults have been instructed, and +in which at present twelve are taught to read. 3. The Institution has +entirely supported, since its commencement, several Day-schools for +poor children, and within the last two years six of such: three for +boys, and three for girls.--The number of all the children that have +had schooling in the Day-schools through the medium of the +Institution, since its formation, amounts to 1534; the number of +those at present in the six Day. Schools is 342. 4. During the last +two years there have been circulated, 1884 copies of the Scriptures +in connexion with the Institution, and since the beginning of the +work, March 5, 1834, five thousand and seventy-eight copies. 5. For +Missionary purposes have been laid out £74. 18s. 4d. 6. The total of +the income for the first three objects, during the last two years, +was £1129. 13s. 1d. The total of the expenses £1111. 13s. 7 1/2d. + +There are, at present, 86 Orphans in the three houses, i. e. 31 in +the Girls’-Orphan-House, 31 in the Infant-Orphan-House, and 24 in the +Boys’-Orphan-House. + +The whole number of Orphans, who have been under our care, from April +11, 1836, to Dec. 9, 1838, amounts to 110. + +God’s blessing has most manifestly rested upon this part of the work. +For, 1. Without any one having been asked for any thing by us, the +sum of £2111 5s. 4 1/2d. has been given to us, entirely as the result +of prayer to God. + +2. Besides this, also, many articles of clothing, furniture, +provisions, etc. 3. Without our solicitation three medical gentlemen, +(one for each house), have, up to Dec. 9, 1838, kindly given their +attendance and medicines gratuitously. + +4. The children have been, on the whole, in good health, and many of +them have greatly improved as to their health, since they have been +with us. 5. Though most of them had been brought up in a very +different manner from what one could desire, yet God has constrained +them, on the whole, to behave exceedingly well, so much so that it +has attracted the attention of all observers. This can be ascribed +only to the good hand of God. 6. There are a few among them, +respecting whom we have a comfortable assurance that they care about +their souls. 7. There is not one of those who have died, of whom we +are without hope, as it regards their eternal welfare; but respecting +two of them we have especial reason to rejoice. The elder of the two, +Harriet Culliford, about twelve years of age when she died, had been +for many months wasting away in consumption. She was, almost during +the whole time of her illness, completely careless about the things +of God; nothing seemed to make any impression upon her, though a well +behaved child in other respects. About a fortnight before her +departure, she was brought to know the Lord, gave the fullest +evidence, that could be given in her circumstances, of a real change +of heart, and departed full of joy at the prospect of being with the +Lord, though previously she had been very desirous to be restored +again. The younger, Leah Culliford, (both of them of a very +consumptive family), fell asleep in Jesus on Sept. 11, 1838. She was +but little more than eight years of age; but many weeks before her +death she gave evidence to those who were placed over her of a change +of heart, and of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. + +The total of the income for the Orphans, from Dec. 9, 1836, to Dec. +9, 1838, has amounted to £1341. 4s. 7d. the total of’ the expenses to +£1664. 4s. 0 3/4d. There was two years ago a balance of £373. 4s. 8 +1/4d. in hand, and now the balance is £50. 5s. 3d. + +Dec. 16. There was a paper anonymously put into the box at Bethesda +Chapel, containing 4l. 10s. In the paper was written "For the Rent of +the Orphan-Houses, from Dec. 10 to Dec. 31, 1838. ‘O taste and see +that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in Him!" In +order that the reader may be able to enter into the value of this +donation, I would request him to read over once more, what I wrote +under "Sept. 29 of this year." [The individual who gave this 4l. 10s. +for the rent of the Orphan-Houses for the first three weeks after the +public meetings, at which the matter about the rent, for the +instruction of the brethren, was fully stated, continued for three +years, up to Dec. 10, 1841, to give regularly, but anonymously, 1l. +10s. a week for the same purpose, which was exactly the sum required +every week for the rent of those three houses. Thus the Lord rewarded +our faithfulness, in carrying out the light which He had given us. +But the chief blessing, resulting from this circumstance, I consider +to be this, that several brethren, who earn their bread by the labour +of their hands, have learned through this circumstance, that it is +the will of the Lord they should lay by their rent weekly. I beseech +those brethren who are not pursuing this course, to do so, and they +will soon prove by experience the benefit of acting on Scriptural +principles even as it regards this life.] + +Dec. 17. Today eleven brethren and sisters were proposed for +fellowship. The Lord still uses us as instruments. Truly, our labour +in the Lord is not in vain! + +Dec. 20. As the expenses for the Orphans have been above 47l. within +the last six days, and as but little above 13l. has come in, and as +the money for printing the Report had to be kept back, in order that +we might not be in debt, we were again today very low in funds, +though it is but six days since the public meetings. As I knew that +tomorrow several pounds would be needed to supply the matrons, I gave +myself this morning to prayer. About a quarter of an hour afterwards +I received 3l., the payment of a legacy, left by a sister, who fell +asleep in Jesus several months since, in Ireland. Besides this I +received from the brother, through whom the legacy was paid, 2l. 10s. +for the Orphan-Fund. With this 5l. 10s. I hope to be able to meet the +expenses of tomorrow. + +I observe here that it might have been naturally supposed that every +heart would be touched, through what was publicly stated about the +remarkable manner in which the Lord had provided for us for nearly +150 days, and that consequently an abundance of means would have come +in. To this is to be added, that 50l. 5s. 3d. was in hand on Dec. 10, +and that therefore it seemed not likely that we should be in need; +and yet, by Dec. 20, we were again so poor, that there was nothing to +meet the expenses of the next day, as has just been related. All this +came not unawares upon me and my fellow-labourers; for we had been +taught to look off from all creature expectations to the living God. +It was on this account that, many times in our prayer meetings during +November and the beginning of December, we were led to ask the Lord, +not to allow us to expect an influx of means because, for the benefit +of the Church, our circumstances would be made known at the public +meetings. And how kind was it of the Lord to give us prayer about +this, and thus to prepare us beforehand; for had we leaned upon +natural expectations, we should have been surely disappointed, as +only six days after the meetings we were as poor as ever. By the +grace of God we are so acquainted with the heart of our Father, that +we speak not about these things to excite the compassion of our +fellow saints, for we have learned to lean upon God only; but we make +known His dealings with us, that others may be led "to taste and see +that the Lord is good," and to put their trust in Him. + +The sister who left the 3l. for the Orphans, as just alluded to, also +left 3l. for the funds of the other objects, 20l. to be divided +between brother Craik and me, and 3l. for the poor saints. + +Dec. 22. A solemn day. I received today the information from my +father that my brother died on October 7th. When I saw him in April +this year, he was living in open sin, and in disunion with my father. +I cannot learn that his end was different from his life, so that I +have no comfort in his death.--Of all the trials that can befall a +believer, the death of an unconverted near relative seems to me one +of the greatest. "Shall not the judge of all the earth do right?" +must be the stay of the believer at such a time, and, by grace, it is +my stay now. I know that the Lord is glorified in my brother, +whatever his end has been: whether in his last hours, like the thief, +on the cross, he was saved, or whether he died in sin and unbelief; +yet I do, as to myself, desire from my heart to adore that grace +which plucked me as a brand out of the burning, many years ago.--May +the Lord make this event a lasting blessing to me, especially in +leading me to earnestness in prayer for my father! + +Dec. 26. From the 21st to this day several small donations had come +in for the Orphans, so that we were supplied as we needed. Today +there was ten-pence left, after the day’s expenses had been met. One +hour after the Lord kindly appeared again. 5l. was sent by Q. Q. This +money came, just after I had prayed for means. + +Dec. 27. Today came in 2l. 12s. 6d., whereby the Lord has again +helped us to meet the probable expenses of tomorrow. + +Dec. 28. This evening the Lord kindly sent further help, when we were +again destitute of the means of providing for tomorrow. I received +20l. (half for the Orphan-Fund, and half for the other funds), with +Ecclesiastes ix. 10: "Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with +thy might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor +wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest." + +Dec. 29. A sister, having felt herself particularly stirred up about +the Orphans, as she writes, sent this evening 7l. five pounds from +herself, and 2l. which had been sent from the EAST INDIES. To the +Lord this is to be ascribed, who, in answer to our prayers, makes +these impressions on the hearts of His children. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1838. + + + +1. As to the church. + +68 brethren and sisters we found in fellowship, when brother Craik +and I came to Bristol. + +458 have been admitted into fellowship since, so that the total +number would be + +526 had there been no changes. But, + +31 have fallen asleep. + +28 are under church discipline, which is the total number of all the +cases of separation from communion within these six years and seven +months. + +36 have left Bristol + +26 have left us, but are still in Bristol. Only 26 within six years +and seven months! + +Total 121. There are therefore only 405 at present in fellowship with +us. 61 have been added during the last year, of whom 36 have been +brought among us to the knowledge of the truth. + +II. As to my temporal supplies + +The Lord has been pleased to give me during the past year: + +1. By the Freewill Offerings through the boxes £151 6s. 8d. + +2. By presents in money from believers in and out of Bristol £141 +18s. 0d. + +3. By money, through family connexion £40 0s. 0d. + +4. By presents in clothes, provisions, etc., which were worth to me, +at least £12 0s. 0d. + +We have been living for six months, half free of rent whereby we have +saved at least £5 0s. 0d. + +Altogether £350 4s. 8d. + + + +During no period of my life had I such need of means, on account of +my own long illness and that of my dear wife, and on account of’ the +many and particular calls for means as during the past year; but also +during no period of my life has the Lord so richly supplied me. +Truly, it must be manifest to all that I have served a most kind +Master, during this year also, and that, even for this life, it is by +far the best thing to seek to act according to the mind of the Lord, +as to temporal things. + +January 1st, 2nd, and 3rd, 1830. We have had three especial church +prayer meetings these three days. The year commenced with mercies. In +the first hour of the year there came in for the Orphans 2l. 7s., +which was given after our usual prayer meeting on December 31, which +this time lasted from seven in the evening till after midnight. + +Jan. 11. Since December 20, came in several donations for the +Orphans, so that we were supplied, before that which we had in hand +was quite gone. On the seventh, however, all our money was again +expended, when a brother, from the neighbourhood of London, who, is +staying here, gave me 10l. Today, when this 10l. was given out, I +received from London 3l. 7s., and 4s. besides. Thus the Lord, as our +need is, sends help, and all in answer to prayer, without our asking +any one. + +Jan. 17. Since the 11th 22 small donations have again come in, by +which we have been helped thus far. This afternoon all which was in +hand was given for housekeeping, and I was again penniless. The Lord, +however, was mindful of this, and in the evening two sovereigns were +left anonymously at my house. In the paper was written: "The enclosed +are for the use of the Orphan-Houses, from J. H., who thinks he ought +to do something for the Institution." J. H. will have in this a proof +that the Lord touched his heart to give the money, because there was +not a penny in hand for those who are the especial care of Him who is +the "Father of the fatherless." + +Jan. 20. Ten small donations have come in since the 17th, which have +enabled us to provide what was needed for the last three days, and +also for today.--For some time past it has appeared to me that the +words "Ye have the poor with you always, and whensoever ye will ye +may do them good," which the Lord spoke to His disciples, who were +themselves very poor, imply that the children of God, as such, have +power with God to bring temporal blessings upon poor saints or poor +unbelievers, through the instrumentality of prayer. Accordingly I +have been led to ask the Lord for means to assist poor saints; and at +different times He has stirred up His children to intrust me with +sums both large and small, for that especial object; or has, by some +means or other, put money at my disposal, which I might so use. In +like manner I had been asking again for means a few days since, to be +able more extensively to assist the poor saints in communion with us, +as just now many of them are not merely tried by the usual temporal +difficulties arising from its being winter, but especially from the +high price of bread. And now this evening the Lord has given me the +answer to my prayer. When I came home from the meeting, I found a +brother at my house who offered to give me 10l. a week, for twelve +weeks, towards providing the poor saints with coals and needful +articles of clothing, but chiefly with bread. [Accordingly this +brother sent me two days afterwards 120l.,--whereby very many, +especially poor widows, were greatly assisted, chiefly with flour and +bread. This money just lasted till the price of bread was reduced +from 9 1/2d. to 7 1/2d. Thus, for several weeks, about 150 quarterns +of bread were distributed weekly, besides what was given in flour, +coals, and clothes. I have mentioned this circumstance as an +encouragement to those who either have little or nothing at all to +give to poor persons, and who yet have a desire to give; and to those +who have means, but whose means are not adequate to relieve all the +demands made upon them. Had we more grace to plead the words of our +Lord, above referred to, we should receive far more from Him to meet +the necessities around us.] + +Jan. 22. A brother formerly an officer in the navy, Who for Jesus’ +sake has given up his rank and pay, gave three silver table spoons, +three silver forks, and two teaspoons, to be sold for the benefit of +the Orphans. The produce of them, with 1l. 5s. which has come in +besides, enabled us to meet the expenses of today and tomorrow. + +Jan. 26. Saturday. The need of the 24th, 25th, and of today was +supplied, partly, by the little that had been left on the 23rd; and +partly, by five small donations, by 9s. for the children’s +needlework, and by 12s. which had come in by the sale of two old silk +dresses, which had been given for sale. Now, when we were again +penniless, 6s. was given me, just after I had been praying for means. + +Jan. 28. Monday morning. We are now quite reduced as to means for the +Orphans. The little which is in hand has been put by for rent. How +the Lord will help us through this day, I know not; but I have faith +in God. He will help us, though I know not how. By God’s help I +purpose not to take a single penny of what is in hand, because it is +due for rent.--This morning and afternoon came in from one individual +4s. 6d., and from a sister, who earns her bread by needlework, 1l. +There was also 1l. 0s. 10d. taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, which our need had led us to open. Thus we were helped +through the day, and have 1l. left for tomorrow. + +Jan. 29. The 1l. which was left helped us through this day; but in +the Boys’-Orphan-House were no means to take in bread. In the evening +eight small loaves were sent by a sister who could not possibly know +our need, and thus we were supplied. + +Jan, 30. A little while after I had been in prayer this morning for +means for the Orphans, brother T. brought a silver watch and 5s., +which had been given last evening. Also, still further, came in this +morning five yards of Indian muslin, a zephyr scarf, a muslin dress, +and a gold locket, to be sold. About two hours afterwards was sent 1l. + +The individual who last evening gave the silver watch and 5s. for the +Orphans, called on me today. She is a servant, who in the house of +her master found the first part of this Narrative soon after the +publication of the first edition, which the Lord used as the means of +her conversion. [She fell asleep in Jesus, after having been 36 years +in fellowship with us.] + +Jan. 31. There came in this morning 2s. 6d. for the Orphans. This, +with 1l. in hand, and 10s. which one of the labourers contributed, +was sufficient for this day’s necessities. + +Feb. 1. There is no money in hand for the Orphans. I am waiting on +God. Just when Brother T. had come to tell me that the need for this +day would be 19s. 6d., one of the labourers in the work came and gave +me 1l. + +Feb. 2. There are again no means in hand. One of the labourers gave +1l., but I know not whether 1l. will be sufficient for the +necessities of this day. This I do know, however, that the Lord will +supply us with more, should more be needed. When I met with the +brethren and sisters for prayer, one of the labourers gave his watch, +under the condition that 1l., which was needed besides that which we +had in hand, should be taken from the rent money which had been put +by, till it could be replaced; and, if otherwise, that the watch +should be sold at the end of the quarter. Just as we had separated, a +sovereign was brought to me, which had been sent to my house since I +had left it. This was taken instead of the one which had been +advanced upon the watch, and thus a speedy answer was granted to our +prayers. We have now been brought to the close of one more week. + +Feb. 3. Lord’s day. A sister sent from her sick bed this evening 2l. +for the Orphans, with Ecclesiastes ix. 10. Thus the Lord has supplied +our need for tomorrow. + +Feb. 4. This afternoon came in two pounds more from the grandmother +of two of the Orphans, in answer to prayer, and very seasonably, as +the coals in one house are quite out, and nearly so in the other two. + +Feb. 5. Today came in 12s., which supplied the necessities of this +day. + +Feb. 6. Only 10s. 6d. was needed for today, which one of the +labourers gave. + +Feb. 7. This day has been one of the most remarkable days as it +regards the Funds. There was no money in hand, I was waiting upon +God. I had asked him repeatedly, but no supplies came. Brother T. +called between 11 and 12 o’clock, to tell me that about 1l. 2s. would +be needed, to take in bread for the three houses, and to meet the +other expenses; but we had only 2s. 9d., which yesterday had been +taken out of the boxes in the Orphan-Houses. He went to Clifton to +make arrangements for the reception of the three orphans of our +sister Loader, who fell asleep on the 4th; for though we have no +funds in hand, the work goes on, and our confidence is not +diminished. I therefore requested him to call on his way back from +Clifton, to see whether the Lord might have sent any money in the +mean time. When he came I had received nothing, but one of the +labourers, having 5s. of his own, gave it. It was now four o’clock. I +knew not how the sisters had got through the day. Just before I went +out to preach, 5s. was brought to my house, which I took as a token +for good. I had been asking the Lord for a passage of the Word to +speak from this evening, and at last was directed to Matt. vi. 19-34, +a subject most applicable to our circumstances. After the meeting was +over, I went to the Girls’-Orphan-House, to meet with the brethren +for prayer, and to give the 5s. which I had received, and to see what +could be done. When I arrived there, I found that a box had come for +me from Barnstaple. The carriage was paid, else there would have been +no money to pay for it. (See how the Lord’s hand is in the smallest +matters!) The box was opened, and it contained, in a letter from a +sister, 10l., of which 8l. was for the Orphans, and 2l. for the Bible +Fund; from brethren at Barnstaple, 2l. 11s. 2d.; and from another +brother 5s. Besides this, there were in the box 4 yards of merino, 3 +pairs of new shoes, 2 pairs of new socks: also six books for sale. +Likewise a gold pencil-case, 2 gold rings, 2 gold drops of ear-rings, +a necklace, and a silver pencil-case. On inquiry, how the sisters had +been carried through the day, I found it thus: everything was in the +houses which was needed for dinner. After dinner a lady from +Thornbury came and bought one of my Narratives and one of the +Reports, and gave 3s. besides. About five minutes afterwards the +baker came to the Boys’-Orphan-House. The matron of the +Girls’-Orphan-House seeing him, went immediately with the 6s. 6d. +which she had just received, (to prevent his being sent away, as +there was no money in hand at the Boys’-Orphan-House,) and bought +bread to the amount of 4s. 6d. The two remaining shillings, with the +little which was in hand, served to buy bread for the Girls’-Orphan-House. +By the donations sent in the box, I was enabled to give a rich supply +to the matrons before the close of the day. + +How sweet to see our Father thus caring for us! To a person who has +spiritual eyes, what a proof is one such day of the most particular +providence of God! And we have had many such days. + +Feb. 8. Today the Lord sent still further help, which is remarkable +for two reasons in particular. First, we had decided yesterday upon +receiving the three little Loaders, though we were so low as to +funds. Thus the Lord sent means on their behalf. Secondly, we were +brought so low yesterday, and our faith was so much tried, in order +that now again the abundance of supplies out of our loving Father’s +hand, might be so much the sweeter. A sister in the neighbourhood of +London sent today in money 1l. 5s., and the following articles for +sale; 3 purses, 1 mourning brooch, 1 amber ditto, 1 amethyst stud, 1 +cameo ditto, I pair of coral ear rings, 1 coral cross, 1 ring set +with a diamond and six rubies, 1 ditto pearl and garnet, 1 ditto +garnet, 1 ruby cross, 4 necklaces, and 148 pamphlets and tracts. Also +several articles of clothing for the children. + +Feb. 13. Since the 8th, five donations, amounting to 9l. 9s., had +come in. This afternoon I paid out the last money which we had in +hand, and in giving it to brother T. said, we have now again to look +to the Lord for further supplies. This evening 5l. was given to me, +which had come in under the folio wing circumstances:-- + +A gentleman and lady visited the Orphan-Houses, and met at the +Boys’-Orphan-House two ladies who were likewise visiting. One of the +ladies said to the matron of the Boys’-Orphan-House: "Of course, you +cannot carry on these institutions without a good stock of funds." +The gentleman, turning to the matron, said, "Have you a good stock?" +She replied: "Our funds are deposited in a bank which cannot break." +The tears came into the eyes of the inquiring lady. The gentleman, on +leaving, gave to the master of the boys 5l., which came in when I had +not a penny in hand. + +Feb. 16. Yesterday came in 17s. 6d. for the Orphans, which, with what +was taken out of the boxes today, helped us through; and thus we have +been brought to the close of one more week. + +March 5. Up to this day, since Feb. 16, the supplies for the Orphans +have come in so seasonably, that we were able comfortably to meet all +the demands. Today, however, I knew that there would be again several +pounds required, as, besides the daily provisions, there were coals +needed, the treacle-casks in two houses were empty, and there was but +5s. in hand. I gave myself therefore to prayer this morning. WHILST I +WAS IN PRAYER, Q. Q. sent a cheque for 7l. 10s. Thus the Lord has +again most seasonably helped us out of our difficulty. There came in +still further this day, 1l. 19s. 2d., by the sale of some articles, +which had been given for the benefit of the Orphans. + +March 6. For some time past the minds of several brethren among us, +as well as that of brother Craik and my own, had been much exercised +respecting certain questions connected with points of church order +and discipline, on account of which brother Craik and I were absent +from Bristol during the last two weeks, to give ourselves to prayer +and consideration respecting those points. Since our return we have +had, these last three evenings, meetings with the saints, before whom +we stated the result to which we had been led, after prayer and +examination of the Scriptures. The following is an abstract of what +was stated at those meetings, which I give here, as this matter forms +an important period in my experience about church matters; but the +abstract will be of little use, except the reader consider carefully +the passages to which reference is made. + + + +I.--QUESTIONS RESPECTING THE ELDERSHIP. + + + +(1) How does it appear to be the mind of God, that, in every Church, +there should be recognized Elders? + +Ans. From the following passages compared together, Matth. xxiv. 45, +Luke xii. 42. From these passages we learn that some are set by the +Lord Himself in the office of Rulers and Teachers, and that this +office (in spite of the fallen state of the Church) should be in +being even down to the close of the present dispensation. +Accordingly, we find from Acts xiv. 23, xx. 17, Tit. i. 5, and 1 Pet. +v. 1, that soon after the saints had been converted, and had +associated together in a Church character, Elders were appointed to +take the rule over them and to fulfil the office of under-shepherds. + +This must not be understood as implying, that, when believers are +associated in Church fellowship, they ought to elect Elders according +to their own will, whether the Lord may have qualified persons or +not; but rather that such should wait upon God, that He Himself would +be pleased to raise up such as may be qualified for teaching and +ruling in His church. + +(2) How do such come into office? + +Ans. By the appointment of the Holy Ghost, Acts xx. 28. + +(3) How may this appointment be made known to the individuals called +to the office, and to those amongst whom they may be called to labour? + +Ans. By the secret call of the Spirit, 1 Tim. iii. 1, confirmed by +the possession of the requisite qualifications, 1 Tim. iii. 2-7, Tit. +i. 6-9, and by the Lord’s blessing resting upon their labours, 1 Cor. +ix. 2. + +In 1 Cor. ix. 2, Paul condescends to the weakness of some, who were +in danger of being led away by those factious persons who questioned +his authority. As an Apostle—appointed by the express word of the +Lord--he needed not such outward confirmation. But if he used his +success as an argument in confirmation of his call, how much more may +ordinary servants of the Lord Jesus employ such an argument, seeing +that the way, in which they are called for the work, is such as to +require some outward confirmation. + +(4) Is it incumbent upon the saints to acknowledge such and to submit +to them in the Lord? + +Ans. Yes. See 1 Cor. xvi. 15, 16, 1 Thess. v. 12, 13, Heb. xiii. 7, +17, and 1 Tim. v. 17. In these passages obedience to pastoral +authority is clearly enjoined. + +II.--Ought matters of discipline to be finally settled by the Elders +in private, or in the presence of the Church, and as the act of the +whole body? + +Ans. (1) Such matters are to be finally settled in the presence of +the Church. This appears from Matth. xviii. 17, 1 Cor. v. 4, 5, 2 +Cor. ii. 6-8, 1 Tim. v. 20. (2) Such matters are to be finally +settled as the act of the whole body, Matth. xviii. 17, 18. In this +passage the act of exclusion is spoken of as the act of the whole +body. 1 Cor. v. 4, 5, 7, 12, 13. In this passage Paul gives the +direction, respecting the exercise of discipline, in such a way as to +render the whole body responsible: verse 7, "Purge out the old +leaven, that ye maybe a new lump;" and verse 13, "Therefore put away +from among yourselves that wicked person." From 2 Cor. ii. 6-8, we +learn that the act of exclusion was not the act of the Elders only, +but of the Church. "Sufficient to such a man is this punishment +(rather, public censure) which was inflicted of many." From verse 8 +we learn that the act of restoration was to be a public act of the +brethren: "Wherefore I beseech you that ye would confirm (rather +ratify by a public act) your love towards him." + +As to the reception of brethren into fellowship, this is an act of +simple obedience to the Lord, both on the part of the Elders and the +whole Church. We are bound and privileged to receive all those who +make a credible profession of faith in Christ, according to that +Scripture, "Receive ye one another, as Christ also received us, to +the glory of God." Rom. xv. 7. + +III.--When should Church acts (such as acts of reception, restoration, +exclusion, &c.) be attended to? + +Ans. It cannot be expressly proved from Scripture, whether such acts +were attended to at the meeting for the breaking of bread, or at any +other meeting; therefore this is a point on which, if different +churches differ, mutual forbearance ought to be exercised. The way in +which such matters have hitherto been managed amongst us has been by +the Church coming together on a week-evening. Before we came to +Bristol we had been accustomed to this mode, and, finding nothing in +Scripture against it, we continued the practice. But, after prayer, +and more careful consideration of this point, it has appeared well to +us that such acts should be attended to on the Lord’s days, when the +saints meet together for the breaking of bread. We have been induced +to make this alteration by the following reasons:-- + +(1) This latter mode prevents matters from being delayed. There not +being a sufficiency of matter for a meeting on purpose every week, it +has sometimes happened, that, what would better have been stated to +the Church at once, has been kept back from the body for some weeks. +Now, it is important that what concerns the whole Church, should be +made known as soon as possible to those who are in fellowship, that +they may act accordingly. Delay, moreover, seems inconsistent with +the pilgrim-character of the people of God. + +(2) More believers can be present on the Lord’s days than can attend +on week evenings. The importance of this reason will appear from +considering how everything which concerns the Church should be known +to as many as possible. For how can the saints pray for those who may +have to be excluded,--how can they sympathize in cases of peculiar +trial,--and how can they rejoice and give thanks on account of those +who may be received or restored, unless they are made acquainted with +the facts connected with such cases? + +(3) A testimony is thus given that all who break bread are Church +members. By attending to Church acts in the meeting for breaking of +bread, we show that we make no difference between receiving into +fellowship at the Lord’s supper, and into Church membership; but that +the individual who is admitted to the Lord’s table is therewith also +received to all the privileges, trials, and responsibilities of +Church membership. + +(4) There is a peculiar propriety in acts of reception, restoration +and exclusion being attended to when the saints meet together for the +breaking of bread, as, in that ordinance especially, we show forth +our fellowship with each other. + +Objections answered. + +(1) This alteration has the appearance of changeableness. + +Reply. Such an objection would apply to any case in which increased +light led to any improvement, and is, therefore, not to be regarded. +It would be an evil thing if there were any change respecting the +foundation truths of the Gospel; but the point in question is only a +matter of Church order. + +(2) More time may thus be required than it would be well to give to +such a purpose on the Lord’s day. + +Reply. As, according to this plan, Church business will be attended +to every Lord’s day, it is more than probable that the meetings will +be thereby prolonged for a few minutes only; but should circumstance +required it, a special meeting may still be appointed during the +week, for all who break bread with us. This, however, would only be +needful, provided the matters to be brought before the brethren were +to require more time than could be given to them at the breaking of +bread. + +N.B. (1) Should any persons be present who do not break bread with +us, they may be requested to withdraw, whenever such points require +to be stated, as it would not be well to speak of in the presence of +unbelievers. + +(2) As there are two places in which the saints meet for the breaking +of bread, the matters connected with Church acts must be brought out +at each place. + + + +IV.--QUESTIONS RELATIVE TO THE LORD’S SUPPER. + + + +(1) How frequently ought the breaking of bread to be attended to? + +Ans. Although we have no express command respecting the frequency of +its observance, yet the example of the apostles and of the first +disciples would lead us to observe this ordinance every Lord’s day. +Acts xx. 7. + +(2) What ought to be the character of the meeting at which the saints +are assembled for the breaking of bread? + +Ans. As in this ordinance we show forth our common participation in +all the benefits of our Lord’s death, and our union to Him and to +each other (1 Cor. x. 16, 17,) opportunity ought to be given for the +exercise of the gifts of teaching or exhortation, and communion in +prayer and praise. Rom. xii. 4—8, Eph. iv. 11—16. The manifestation +of our common participation in each other’s gifts cannot be fully +given at such meetings, if the whole meeting is, necessarily, +conducted by one individual. This mode of meeting does not however +take off from those, who have the gifts of teaching or exhortation, +the responsibility of edifying the church, as opportunity may be +offered. + +(3) Is it desirable that the bread should be broken at the Lord’s +Supper by one of the Elders, or should each individual of the body +break it for himself? + +Ans. Neither way can be so decidedly proved from Scripture, that we +are warranted in objecting to the other as positively unscriptural, +yet-- + +(1) The letter of Scripture seems rather in favour of its being done +by each brother and sister, 1 Cor. x. 16, 17. "The bread which we +break." + +(2) Its being done by each of the disciples, is more fitted to +express that we all, by our sins, have broken the body of our Lord. + +(3) By attending to the ordinance in this way, we manifest our +freedom from the common error that the Lord’s supper must be +administered by some particular individual, possessed of what is +called a ministerial character, instead of being an act of social +worship and obedience. + +[Before brother Craik and I left Bristol for the consideration of the +above points, things wore a gloomy appearance. A separation in the +church seemed to be unavoidable. But God had mercy, and pitied us. He +was pleased to give us not merely increased light, but showed us also +how to act, and gave us a measure of wisdom, grace and spiritual +courage for acting. The clouds were dispelled, and peace was restored +in the church.] + +While I was away from Bristol, Samuel Loader, a little orphan boy, +died, after a fortnight’s residence in the house, and only three +weeks after his mother’s death. The brethren in the Boys-Orphan-House +consider him to have died in the faith. + +March 16. Saturday. By the good hand of the Lord we are brought to +the close of one more week. I have been able to meet all the current +expenses for the Orphans, and to pay, besides this, 10l. for +salaries. Thus a part of what has been due for several weeks to my +dear fellow-labourers is defrayed. I have especially prayed within +the last ten days that the Lord would be pleased to give me the means +for this. 2s. 8 1/2d. I have left. + +March 18. Monday. Last evening 5l. came in with Eccles. ix. 10. Thus +we were again enabled to supply all the necessities of this day. + +Pause a few moments, dear reader! Consider how seasonably the Lord +sends the supplies! Not once does He forget us! Not once is our need +only half supplied! Not once do His supplies come too late! Dear +reader, if you have not the like experience of the Lord’s watchful +care, Oh taste and see that the Lord is good! + +March 20. The need of the 18th and 19th was supplied by the 5l. which +had come in on the 18th. Today we were again poor and needy, +therefore the Lord thought on us, and sent us 3l. l6s. 1 1/2d. + +March 22. Some trinkets which had been given, and 12s. which was in +hand, supplied the need of today. Yesterday were sent six sacks of +potatoes. We were not able to lay in a stock last autumn (as we had +done the two previous autumns) on account of want of means, but in no +previous year have we had so many sent. + +March 23. Today I received a letter from brother T., who is on +account of his health in Devonshire, to inform me that a heavy gold +chain, a ring set with ten brilliants, a pair of gold bracelets, and +2l. have been given to him. He gave a Report to a brother, who, +having read it, was thereby stirred up to prayer, and knowing that +his believing sister possessed these trinkets, he asked the Lord to +incline her heart to give them up for the benefit of our Orphans, +which she soon after did. By means of these donations I am able both +to meet the remaining expenses of this week, and also to pay 15l., +which still remains due on account of the salaries. My fellow-labourers +not only never ask me for any thing, but are willing to part with money, +or any thing else in the hour of need; nevertheless, I had asked the Lord +about this point frequently, and He has now given me my request, whereof +I am glad. I received also this afternoon 5l. 10s., besides a number of +things to be disposed of for the Orphans. + +March 24. The Lord has again kindly opened His liberal hand today, +and given us 6l. 10s. Thus we have wherewith to meet the necessities +of tomorrow in the Orphan-Houses. + +From March 24 to April 7, came in about sixty small donations. This, +with the produce of the sale of the trinkets, supplied all our need +for the Orphans. + +April 7. Our funds were now again spent, except 15s., though three +days ago above 30l. had come in; therefore the Lord has sent in again +this day several contributions, altogether 6l. 5s. + +April 8. The money which came in yesterday was sent off today for +housekeeping in the three different houses, and when I was now again +left penniless, there came in 2l. 6s. 10d. + +April 9. The 2l. 6s. 10d. was given out today for housekeeping, and I +am once more penniless.--A few hours after I had written this, there +was given to me by a brother 2l. 10s. When I received this money, I +was at the same time informed of the death of one of our sisters, a +widow, whose child we can receive. + +April 10. Today was sent anonymously from the country 5l. In the +evening I received still further 1l. l6s. 6d. + +April 11. It is three years today since the first Orphans were +received. Good indeed has the Lord been to us during these three +years! We have lacked nothing! Again He has sent this day, in a +remarkable manner, 5l., with the following letter, addressed to a +brother: + +"My dear Friend, enclosed are 5l. for the Orphan-Asylum, the history +of which is rather interesting. We have a servant who lived some +years ago as kitchen-maid in a noble family (i. e. the master a +wealthy member of Parliament, the mistress an Earl’s daughter.) No +perquisites were allowed; but the individual in question acted on the +same principle as her fellow-servants, and sold kitchen-stuff for her +own benefit, which she thinks might amount to 4l.; and therefore she +believes that 5l. would fully repay principal and interest. This +money is of course due to her former master and mistress, with whom I +have had several interviews on the subject. They were disposed that +the money should be given to some charity; and in consequence of +reading one of the Reports you kindly sent me, the young woman had a +great desire that her own repentance might yield fruit to that work +of faith and love. Her wishes have been sanctioned by her former +mistress. It is rather remarkable that our truly Christian servant +had been converted a year and a half, before this individual sin, +calling for pecuniary restitution, had come into her remembrance." + +April 13. I conversed with another of the Orphans, who seems to have +been truly converted, and who has walked consistently for many +months. Tomorrow she will be united with the saints in communion. She +will be the third in fellowship with us, and several have died in the +faith. How has the Lord owned the work, even in this respect! + +April 14. Today 5l. 0s. 8d. came in for the Orphans, 1l. of which is +one of the most remarkable gifts that we have ever had. A poor +brother, with a large family, and small wages (there are eight in the +family, and he had 15s. wages till lately, when they were raised to +18s.) put by this money by little and little of what was given him by +his master for beer. This brother, who was converted about five years +ago, was before that time a notorious drunkard. + +April 30. Today our dear young brother, John Short, only a little +more than 14 years old, fell asleep, after having been for several +years ill. He had been for several years converted. He was one of our +Sunday-School children before his illness. When, many months since, +he lost one of his limbs by amputation, he glorified the Lord not +merely by the way in which he sustained the severe suffering +attending the operation, but also by confessing the Lord, as his +strength, in the hour of trial. He was a sweet youth! + +July 2. Today was given me, when there was not one shilling in hand, +50l. for the School—Bible—and Missionary-Fund. + +July 15. Monday. Today 2l. 7s. 3d. was needed for the Orphans, but we +had nothing. How to obtain the means for a dinner, and for what else +was needed, I knew not. My heart was perfectly at peace, and +unusually sure of help, though I knew not in the least whence it was +to come. Before brother T. came, I received a letter from India, +written in May, with an order for 50l. for the Orphans. I had said +last Saturday to brother T., that it would be desirable to have 50l., +as the salaries of all my fellow-labourers are due, the three +treacle-casks empty, all the provision stores exhausted, several +articles of clothing needed, and worsted for the boys to go on with +their knitting. Now the Lord has sent exactly 50l. Moreover this +money comes very seasonably, as in three days I shall have to leave +Bristol for some days, and can now go comfortably, as it regards +leaving means behind. + +[In the afternoon of this same day I met at a brother’s house with +several believers, when a sister said that she had often thought +about the care and burden I must have on my mind, as it regards +obtaining the necessary supplies for so many persons. As this may not +be a solitary instance, I would state, that, by the grace of God, +this is no cause of anxiety to me. The children I have years ago cast +upon the Lord. The whole work is His, and it becomes me to be without +carefulness. In whatever points I am lacking, in this point I am +able, by the grace of God, to roll the burden upon my heavenly +Father. Though now (July 1845) for about seven years our funds have +been so exhausted, that it has been comparatively a rare case that +there have been means in hand to meet the necessities of the Orphans +for three days together; yet have I been only once tried in spirit, +and that was on Sept. 18, 1838, when for the first time the Lord +seemed not to regard our prayer. But when He did send help at that +time, and I saw that it was only for the trial of our faith, and not +because He had forsaken the work that we were brought so low, my soul +was so strengthened and encouraged, that I have not only not been +allowed to distrust the Lord since that time, but I have not even +been cast down when in the deepest poverty. Nevertheless, in this +respect also am I now, as much as ever, dependant on the Lord; and I +earnestly beseech for myself and my fellow-labourers the prayers of +all those, to whom the glory of God is dear. How great would be the +dishonour to the name of God, if we, who have so publicly made our +boast in Him, should so fall as to act in these very points as the +world does! Help us then, brethren, with your prayers, that we may +trust in God to the end. We can expect nothing but that our faith +will yet be tried, and it may be more than ever; and we shall fall, +if the Lord does not uphold us.] + +July 16 and 17. These two days we have had two especial prayer +meetings, to commend to the Lord five German brethren who for some +weeks have been sojourning among us, and who purpose to leave +tomorrow for Liverpool, to sail from thence to the East Indies. + +July 18. I left this morning with the German brethren, to accompany +them to Liverpool. + +July 21. Liverpool. This afternoon I preached in the open air on the +docks. Truly, it must be a sweet privilege to be permitted frequently +to proclaim the glad tidings of the Gospel in the open air, which the +Lord does not bestow upon me, as, under ordinary circumstances, I +have no strength for this work.--The people were attentive. There was +but one who mocked. + +July 22. Preached again out of doors. + +July 23. I accompanied the five brethren on board this afternoon. + +July 27. Today I had another remarkable proof of the importance of +the children of God opening their hearts to each other, especially +when they are getting into a cold state, or are under the power of a +certain sin, or are in especial difficulty. An individual called on +me, who I trust is a brother, with whom I had conversed once before, +but felt uncomfortable respecting him. When he called again today, it +appeared to me that there was something upon his heart, which, if I +could but know, I might be instrumental in benefiting him. I pressed +him affectionately to open his heart, assuring him at the same time +that the matter which he might speak of should remain in my own +bosom. At last I succeeded. [The result of this conversation was, +that the advice which I gave him, led him, after three days, to leave +for America, where he ought to have been, instead of being in +England; and if he has followed my advice, in one other point, the +matter which for years had burdened his conscience, and which, no +doubt had been the means of keeping him in a low spiritual state, +will have no more power over him. Should this fall into the hands of +any children of God who have a particular trial or burden, or a +guilty conscience, on account of a particular thing, or a besetting +sin, etc., on account of which it would be beneficial to open their +hearts to another child of God, in whose love, spiritual judgment, +etc., they have confidence, I would advise them to do so. I know from +my own experience, how often the snare of the devil has been broken, +when under the power of sin; how often the heart has been comforted, +when nigh to be overwhelmed; how often advice, under great +perplexity, has been obtained,--by opening my heart to a brother in +whom I had confidence. We are children of the same family, and ought +therefore to be helpers one of another.] + +Aug. 3. £3. 5s. was required to meet the necessities of the +Orphan-Houses this day. The Lord enabled us to meet this demand, +partly, by the sale of some Indian muslin, which had been given some +months since, but which was only now disposed of; partly, by a few +small donations; and partly, by what one of the labourers added of +his own. [We have often found that the money for articles, which were +put out to be sold, has come in most seasonably. At this time it +happened so that a brother, into whose hands the muslin had been put, +felt himself stirred up to go and ask the individual who had it for +sale whether she had disposed of it. This brother knew nothing about +our need at that time.] + +Aug. 5. Monday. On Saturday and yesterday morning I had repeatedly +asked the Lord to send us help, as there was not a penny in hand for +the need of today. Yesterday morning a brother gave me two +sovereigns, and in the evening I received two more. Besides this, +there was 4l. 10s. anonymously given for three weeks’ rent for the +Orphan-Houses, also 10s. by a brother, and 9s. came in for needlework +of the children; so that altogether 9l. 9s. came in yesterday. + +This evening I took tea with a sister who purposes to leave Bristol +tomorrow for Van Diemen’s Land. [For the comfort of any saints, who +may be similarly situated, I mention the following circumstance. The +son of this sister was transported many years since. In the course of +time he obtained a business of his own in Van Diemen’s Land, and +wished his mother to come to him. The mother went, and had, in answer +to the prayers of the saints, a prosperous voyage. When she arrived, +she found her son truly converted. What a joy for the long and deeply +afflicted mother! What remarkable means the Lord uses to bestow +blessings! Moreover, to mark that the Lord had sent her to her son, +she found that a month before her arrival his wife had died, and that +she therefore reached him just at the right time, both on account of +his children and his business.] + +Aug. 7. Today again about 3l. was needed for housekeeping at the +Orphan-Houses, which the Lord had sent in since the day before +yesterday, so that we were able to meet all the demands. + +Aug. 8. Today 1l. 3s. was needed, but only 3s. had come in. The +deficiency was supplied by one of the labourers giving a sovereign of +his own. Though there is no money in hand, yet are we so little +discouraged, that we have received today one orphan boy, and have +given notice for the admission of six other children, which will +bring the number up to 98 altogether. + +Aug. 9. Only 10s. had come in since yesterday, and as 30s. were +needed, one of the labourers gave a sovereign. + +Aug. 10. Saturday. The need of today is 2l. 10s. but only 10s, has +been given since yesterday. One of the labourers, having 2l., gave +it, and thus our need was supplied. + +Aug. 12. Monday. The Lord has again kindly sent 11l. Of this sum 10l. +came in from Q. Q., when again there was not one penny in hand. We +have now supplies for about four days. + +Aug. 14. Today was very seasonably sent a whole piece of calico and a +piece of print. + +Aug. 16. All our money is now again gone. Today 1l. 3s. was needed, +but only 3s. was in hand. One of the labourers was able to add a +sovereign, and thus we were helped. + +Aug. 17. Saturday. 5l. was needed today, but only 7s. 6d. had come +in. The remaining 2l. l2s. 6d. one of the labourers gave. Thus we +were helped to the close of another week. + +Aug. 19. Monday. This has been again a day in which our faith has +been particularly tried; but even this day we have not been +confounded. Not one penny was in hand when the day began. We had +therefore now, for more than one hundred persons, again to look to +the Lord. But this I must say, to the praise of the Lord, my soul was +perfectly at peace. I meant to have gone very early to the +Orphan-Houses to meet with my fellow-labourers for prayer; but, as +one person after the other called upon me, I was kept from it the +whole morning. When brother T. called upon me between 12 and 1 +o’clock for money, I had none to give. In the afternoon at four I was +able to meet with the brethren and sisters. When I came to the +Girls’-Orphan-House, I found that one of those children, for the +reception of whom we had given notice, had been brought from Bath, +and with him was sent 1l. 5s. After the meeting was over, one of the +labourers gave 10s. By means of this 1l. 15s. we were able for this +day also to provide every thing needful. + +Aug. 20. When we met together this morning for prayer, only one +shilling had come in since yesterday, and 2l. at least was needed to +meet the expenses of this day. After prayer, one of the labourers +gave 10s., and 1s. 1 1/2d. was taken out of one of the boxes. This +12s. 1 1/2d. was divided to meet the momentary need. About an hour +afterwards, 1l. 14s. came in, being the payment, in part, of articles +which had been sold several months since. + +Aug. 21. Nothing had come in since yesterday. 13s. would have been +needed to have taken in the usual quantity of bread. After we had +prayed, the same labourer who had contributed yesterday and the day +before, gave today 5s. more. This helped us to buy milk; but in one +of the houses the usual quantity of bread could not be taken in. I +have further to notice respecting this time of trial, that I had +purposed to have gone yesterday to Bath, to meet today and tomorrow +with several brethren, who are met there from various parts of the +country, to unite in prayer for the present spiritual necessities of +the church at large. However, on account of our present need in the +Orphan-Houses, I could not go yesterday, as I did not think it right +to let my fellow-labourers bear the trial alone. Today also I have +been kept here, as our poverty is greater than ever. Yet (the Lord be +praised!) neither have the children in the least lacked this day, nor +has my mind been in any degree disturbed. My fellow-labourers also +seem quite in peace. We are waiting for deliverance, and we are sure +that the Lord, in His own time, will send it. + +Aug. 22. In my morning walk, when I was reminding the Lord of our +need, I felt assured that He would send help this day. My assurance +sprang from our need; for there seemed no way to get through the day, +without help being sent. After breakfast I considered whether there +was any thing which might be turned into money for the dear children. +Among other things, there came under my hands a number of religious +pamphlets which had been given for the benefit of the Orphans; but +all seemed not nearly enough, to meet the necessities of the day, In +this our deep poverty, after I had gathered together the few things +for sale, a sister, who earns her bread by the labour of her hands, +brought 82l. This sister had seen it to be binding upon believers in +our Lord Jesus to act out His commandments: "Sell that ye have (sell +your possessions) and give alms," Luke xii. 33; and "Lay not up for +yourselves treasures upon earth," Matt. vi. 19. Accordingly she had +drawn her money out of the bank and stocks, being 250l., and had +brought it to me at three different times for the benefit of the +Orphans, the Bible—Missionary—and School-Fund, and the poor saints, +About two months ago she brought me 100l. more, being the produce of +some other possession which she had sold, the half of which was to be +used for the School—Bible-and Missionary Fund; and the other half +for the poor saints. This 82l. which she had brought today, is the +produce of the sale of her last earthly possession.--[At the time I am +preparing the seventh edition for the press, more than twenty-nine +years have passed away, and this sister has never expressed the least +regret as to the step she took, but goes on, quietly labouring with +her hands, to earn her bread.]--But even now, when this money was +given, I left it in the hands of the Lord, whether any part of it +should be applied for the Orphans. I asked the sister, therefore, +whether she wished the money to be spent in any particular way, as +she had expressed her wish about the former sums. This time she left +it with me, to lay out the money as I thought best. I took, +therefore, half of it for the Orphans, and half for the other objects +of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. I have thus been enabled to +come to Bath, (after I had sent a more than usual supply to the +matrons), to meet, at least for the remaining time, with the brethren +who are assembled here for prayer. Before the day is over, I have +received 10l. more, while at Bath, from one of the brethren who are +assembled here; so that our deep poverty, in the morning, has been +turned into a comparative abundance. + +Aug. 23. The Lord has sent still further supplies. Another of the +brethren gave me this morning 1l., and a third, with whom I drove +back to Bristol, 5l. + +From Aug. 25 to Sept. 1, there came in above 17l. more. + +Sept. 4. I have been led to pray whether it is the Lord’s will that I +should leave Bristol for a season, as I have for the last fortnight +been suffering from indigestion, by which my whole system is +weakened, and thus the nerves of my head are more than usually +affected. There are, however, two hindrances in the way, want of +means for the Orphans, and want of means for my own personal +expenses.--Today I have received a cheque from Q. Q. for 7l. 10s. for +the Orphans, which came, therefore, very seasonably. Also 4l. besides +has came in since the day before yesterday. + +Sept. 5. Today a sister sent me 5l. for myself, to be used for the +benefit of my health. She had heard that my health is again failing. +I do not lay by money for such purposes; but whenever I really need +means, whether for myself or others, the Lord sends them, in answer +to prayer; for He had in this case again given me prayer respecting +means for myself and for the Orphans, that my way might be made plain +as to leaving Bristol for a season. + +Sept. 6. My body is now so weak, and my head again so affected in +consequence of it, and I have found it needful to give up the work at +once. I left today for Trowbridge, for three days, intending +afterwards to go with my wife into Devonshire, if the Lord permit. + +Sept. 7. Trowbridge. This has been a very good day. I have had much +communion with the Lord. How kind to take me from the work at Bristol +for a season, to give me more communion with Himself. I remembered +the Lord’s especial goodness to me in this place, at the commencement +of last year. How kind has He also been since! I prayed much for +myself, for the Church at large, for the saints here and in Bristol, +for my unconverted relatives, for my dear wife, and that the Lord +would supply my own temporal necessities and those of the Orphans:--and +I know that He has heard me.--I am surrounded with kind friends +in the dear saints, under whose roof I am, and feel quite at home. My +room is far better than I need; yet an easy chair, in this my weak +state of body, to kneel before in prayer, would have added to my +comfort. In the afternoon, without having given a hint about it, I +found an easy chair put into my room. I was struck with the kindness, +the especial kindness of my heavenly Father, in being mindful of the +smallest wants and comforts of His child.--Having had more prayer than +usual, I found that my intercourse with the saints at tea was with +unction, and more than usually profitable. But this very fact reminds +me of my sad deficiencies, and of my great lack of real fervency of +spirit. May the Lord carry on His work with power in my soul! Today I +had 1l. given to me, half for the Orphans, and half for the other +funds. Thus the Lord has begun to answer my prayers; for I expect far +more. + +Sept. 8. Lord’s day. I assembled with a few saints at Trowbridge, and +spoke to them in the morning and evening with much assistance. The +afternoon I spent at home over the Word and in prayer. God has +evidently blessed the Word. He had a purpose in sending me here, both +for blessing to myself and to others. + +Sept. 9. This morning I conversed with a poor aged sister in the +Lord, who for 47 years has been a believer, but who, from want of +settling by the written Word only, whether she is a believer or not, +has often had doubts about her state before God. However, I brought +the Scriptures only before her. [My pressing the Scriptures alone +upon her heart, was made such a blessing, that I hear she has not +doubted in the same way since.] This aged sister told me she often +prays for the Orphans, and for the continuance of means. How many +helpers has the Christian in the conflict; yet all are strengthened +by ONE who is ALWAYS for us! + +This evening I returned to Bristol, to go from hence tomorrow to +Exeter, if the Lord permit, on account of my health. I had been +earnestly asking the Lord, while I was staying at Trowbridge, that He +would be pleased to send in supplies for the Orphans, before I go +into Devonshire, and I had the fullest assurance that means would +come in before I left Bristol. I therefore asked my wife, on my +return, how much had come in, and found that it was only 8l. 9s. 7 +3/4d. This was not nearly as much as I had expected, and would not +answer the end for which I had particularly asked means, i. e. that I +might be able to leave enough for several days. My reply therefore +was, according to the faith given to me, and judging from the +earnestness and confidence of my prayer, that the Lord would send +more before I left. About an hour after, brother Craik brought me +10l., which he had received this evening with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, +and also a letter from a brother at Ilfracombe, in which the arrival +of a large box, full of articles, to be sold for the benefit of the +Orphans, is announced. Thus the Lord has dealt with me according to +my faith. + +Sept. 10. This morning before I left Bristol came in still further +1l. l6s. 7d., so that I had about 20l. to leave behind for the +present need. I found also, on opening the box which has arrived, 65 +books, a brace of valuable pistols, and a great many articles of East +India linen. How kind of the Lord to send these supplies just now! + +After my departure from Bristol I continued to help my +fellow-labourers by my prayers. I had the fullest assurance that the +Lord would help them, and my hope was not ashamed, as will appear +from the following part of the journal.--In the evening of Sept. 10th, +we arrived in Exeter, where we were lodged by a brother, who on the +following day left for Plymouth. The love of this brother constrained +us to remain for five days at his house, though he was absent, +leaving us all the house with a sister, as a servant, to ourselves. +Though at another time I should have preferred the opportunity of +having intercourse with this brother, yet now, in this my weak state +of body, the being left alone was the very thing which suited me. I +could not but trace the kind hand of God in this circumstance. I was +able to speak twice publicly while in Exeter. I rejoiced at what I +saw there of the work of God. This city was in the year 1830 +especially laid on my heart, when I used frequently to preach there; +but then there was a great spiritual deadness. + +From Sept. 16th to Sept. 28th we were at Teignmouth my former field +of labour. I had not seen the brethren, among whom I used to labour, +since May, 1833. The Lord gave me strength, many times to minister in +the Word among them, during the time of my stay there. At Teignmouth +also, I had, in some respects, reason to be glad, particularly in +that I saw some of those truths practised, and that more fully and +intelligently, which, though in much weakness and indistinctly, I had +sought to set forth whilst labouring there. At Teignmouth also, as +well as in Exeter, the saints showed us much love. A brother and +sister lodged us during the whole of our stay. May the Lord reward +them for their love!--While I was at Teignmouth I received on Sept. +18th, the following letter from brother T., in reference to the work +in Bristol:-- + +Bristol, Sept. 16, 1839. + +My dear Brother, I have delayed writing until now, that, as I hoped, +I might have additional news to tell you after the Lord’s day. And +now that my hope has been made good, I rejoice to do so. The Lord has +dealt most graciously with us since your departure. The children, +brother B. and the sisters are well, and the wants of the Orphans +have been abundantly supplied. There has come in altogether 24l. 8s. +6d., &c. + +On Sept. 24th, I received another letter from brother T., dated +Bristol, Sept. 23rd, in which he writes: "It rejoices me that I have +still nothing but the goodness of the Lord to tell you of. That +little word ‘Ebenezer’ is at once our encouragement and our daily +song, of which we are not weary. I have received since the last +information you had from me 5l. l7s. 4 1/4d., besides 1l. 10s. for +the rent of the Orphan-Houses." + +On Sept. 28th, while I was at Teignmouth, a brother asked me about +the funds for the Orphans, being willing to help, and I had reason to +believe considerably, if they were in need. Though I knew not for a +certainty that there was one shilling in hand in Bristol, yet for the +Lord’s sake I declined telling him any thing about the funds, in +order that the work might evidently be carried on by dealing with the +Lord Himself. + +On Sept. 28th we left Teignmouth for Plymouth, being taken by the +love of a brother from Teignmouth to Newton Bushel in his own little +carriage. At Plymouth we found again a kind brother waiting at the +coach office, to receive us. He took us to his house and lodged us +till our departure, on Oct. 6th. During my stay at Plymouth, I was +stirred up afresh to early rising, a blessing, the results of which I +have not lost since. That which led me to it was the example of the +brother in whose house I was staying, and a remark which he made in +speaking on the sacrifices in Leviticus, "That as not the refuse of +the animals was to be offered up, so the best part of our time should +be especially given to communion with the Lord." I had been, on the +whole, rather an early riser during former years. But since the +nerves of my head had been so weak, I thought, that, as the day was +long enough for my strength, it would be best for me not to rise +early, in order that thus the nerves of my head might have the longer +quiet. On this account I rose only between six and seven, and +sometimes after seven. For the same reason also I brought myself +purposely into the habit of sleeping a quarter of an hour, or half an +hour, after dinner: as I thought I found benefit from it, in quieting +the nerves of my head. In this way, however, my soul had suffered +more or less every day, and sometimes considerably, as now and then +unavoidable work came upon me before I had had sufficient time for +prayer and reading the Word. After I had heard the remark to which I +have alluded, I determined, that whatever my body might suffer, I +would no longer let the most precious part of the day pass away while +I was in bed. By the grace of God I was enabled to begin the very +next day to rise earlier, and have continued to rise early since that +time. I allow myself now about seven hours’ sleep, which, though I am +far from being strong, and have much to tire me mentally, I find is +quite sufficient to refresh me. In addition to this I gave up the +sleeping after dinner. The result has been that I have thus been able +to procure long and precious seasons for prayer and meditation before +breakfast; and, as to my body, and the state of the nervous system in +particular, I have been much better since. Indeed I believe that the +very worst thing I could have done for my weak nerves was, to have +lain an hour or more longer in bed than I used to do before my +illness; for it was the very way to keep them weak.--As this may fall +into the hands of some children of God who are not in the habit of +rising early, I make a few more remarks on the subject. + +I. It might be asked, how much time shall I allow myself for rest? +The answer is, that no rule of universal application can be given, as +all persons do not require the same measure of sleep, and also the +same persons, at different times, according to the strength or +weakness of their body, may require more or less. Females also, being +generally weaker in body, require more sleep than males. Yet, from +what I can learn, it is the opinion of medical persons, that men in +health do not require more than between six and seven hours sleep, +and females no more than between seven and eight hours; so that it +would be rather an exception, for a man to require more than seven +and a woman more than eight hours. But my decided advice, at the same +time, is, that children of God should be careful not to allow +themselves too little sleep, as there are few men who can do with +less than six hours sleep, and yet be well in body and mind, and few +females who can do with less than seven hours. Certain it is that for +a long time, as a young man before I went to the university, I went +to bed regularly at ten and rose at four, studied hard, and was in +good health; and certain also, that since I have allowed myself only +about seven hours, from the time of my visit at Plymouth in Oct. +1839, I have been much better in body, and in my nerves in +particular, than when I was eight or eight hours and a half in bed. + +II. If it be asked, but why should I rise early? The reply is, to +remain too long in bed is 1. waste of time, which is unbecoming a +saint, who is bought by the precious blood of Jesus, with his time +and all he has, to be used for the Lord. If we sleep more than is +needful for the refreshment of the body, it is wasting the time with +which the Lord has intrusted us as a talent, to be used for His +glory, for our own benefit, and the benefit of the saints and the +unbelievers around us. 2. To remain too long in bed injures the body. +Just as when we take too much food, we are injured thereby, so as it +regards sleep. Medical persons would readily allow, that, the lying +longer in bed than is needful for the strengthening of the body, does +weaken it. 3. It injures the soul. The lying too long in bed, not +merely keeps us from giving the most precious part of the day to +prayer and meditation, but this sloth leads also to many other +evils.--Any one need but make the experiment of spending one, two, or +three hours in prayer and meditation before breakfast, either in his +room, or with his Bible in his hand in the fields, and he will soon +find out the beneficial effect which early rising has upon the +outward and inward man. I beseech all my brethren and sisters into +whose hand this may fall, and who are not in the habit of rising +early, to make the trial, and they will praise the Lord for having +done so. + +III. It may lastly be said, but how shall I set about rising early? +My advice is, 1. Commence at once, delay it not. Tomorrow begin to +rise. 2. But do not depend upon your own strength. This may be the +reason why, before this, you may have begun to rise early, but have +given it up. As surely as you depend upon your own strength in this +matter, it will come to nothing. In every good work we depend upon +the Lord, and in this thing we shall feel especially how weak we are. +If any one rises that he may give the time which he takes from sleep, +to prayer and meditation, let him be sure that Satan will try to put +obstacles in the way. 3. Do trust in the Lord for help, You will +honour Him, if you expect help from Him in this matter. Give yourself +to prayer for help, expect help, and you will have it. 4. Use, +however, in addition to this, the following means: a, Go early to +bed. If you stay up late, you cannot rise early. Let no society and +no pressure of engagements keep you from going habitually early to +bed. If you fail in this, you neither can nor ought to get up early, +as your body requires rest. Keep also particularly in mind, that +neither for the body nor the soul is it the same thing, whether you +go to bed late and rise late, or whether you go to bed early and rise +early. Even medical persons will tell you how injurious it is to sit +up late, and to spend the morning hours in bed; but how much more +important still is it to retire early and to rise early, in order to +make sure of time for prayer and meditation before the business of +the day commences, and to devote to those exercises that part of our +time, when the mind and the body are most fresh, in order thus to +obtain spiritual strength for the conflict, the trials, and the work +of the day. b, Let some one call you, if possible, at the time which +you have determined before God that you will rise; or procure, what +is still better, an alarum, by which you may regulate almost to a +minute the time when you wish to rise. For about 12s. a little German +clock, with an alarum, may be bought almost in every town. Though I +have very many times been awakened by the Lord, in answer to prayer, +almost to the minute when I desired to rise; yet I thought it well to +procure an alarum, to assist me in my purpose of rising early: not +indeed as if it could give the least help, without the Lord’s +blessing, for I should remain in bed, notwithstanding the noise of +the alarum, were He not to give me grace to rise; but simply looking +upon it as a means. c, Rise at once when you are awake. Remain not a +minute longer in bed, else you are likely to fall asleep again. d, Be +not discouraged by feeling drowsy and tired in consequence of your +rising early. This will soon wear off. You will after a few days feel +yourself stronger and fresher than when you used to lie an hour or +two longer than you needed. e, Allow yourself always the same hours +for sleep. Make no change, except sickness oblige you. . + +Plymouth, Oct. 1. Today my soul was again especially drawn out in +prayer for the dear Orphans. I not merely asked the Lord that He +would still continue to supply their need, but I was so fully assured +that He had sent the necessary means since I last heard, that I was +enabled to praise Him for having done so. Immediately after I had +praised Him, but while I was yet on my knees, came another letter +from brother T., dated Bristol, Sept. 29, in which he writes thus: + +"The Lord’s help has been graciously continued to us since I wrote +last. Ever since your absence, the supplies have come in so +seasonably, that I have not had occasion, until now, of opening the +boxes in the Orphan-Houses. There came in, since my last account, +from a sister 2s. 6d., with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, 1l.. 1s. 6d., +through Mr. C. of Bath, 2l. 3s. 4d., from the boxes 14s. 6 1/2d., +from A. M. B. 5s. Some apples besides have been given, some old +clothes, and a large bath to be sold or used. I gave on Thursday to +the sisters 10l., and today for the Boys’-Orphan-House 1l. 10s. After +this I have in hand 1l. 3s. 8 3/4d., to be multiplied as the Lord +wills. I had written thus far, and was on the point of writing that +we expected sister E. home this evening, when the door-bell rang, and +sister E. came in, bringing a little packet of money, directed to +you, from Hereford, enclosing a letter and ten sovereigns "for your +labours of faith and love;" so that the remainder of the barrel of +meal has been multiplied somewhat already. It is most seasonable +help! It rejoices me that it has come in time, for you to have the +intelligence with this letter. I have in hand l9s. for the other +funds, therefore it seems well to me, if it should be needed before I +hear from you, to take only 5l. for the Orphans; but, if it pleases +the Lord to enable us to do without, I shall leave it untouched until +you write. In addition to what I have written, I have just received +10s. and 1l. 9s. 3d. How gracious!" + +The time from October 6th to the 17th I spent among the brethren at +Bideford and Barnstaple, with great refreshment to my own soul, and +was also allowed by the Lord to minister to them. The whole of my +stay among the children of God in Devonshire has been very profitable +to me. May my soul not lose the blessing of it! How the Lord uses our +infirmity of body for the blessing of our souls! In my case also it +was instrumental in communicating blessing to others. I was able to +speak more frequently in public, while absent from Bristol, than I +should have done under ordinary circumstances, had I remained in +Bristol. + +Barnstaple, Oct. 10. The day before yesterday I had 10s. given to me +here for the Orphans; and yesterday 3l., which came in most +seasonably, as will appear from the following letter which I received +this evening from brother T. + +Bristol, Oct. 8th, 1839. + +"My dear Brother, we have continued to enjoy the gracious help of the +Lord since I last wrote to you. Nearly up to that time the supplies +had come in so seasonably, that the previous disbursements had +scarcely ever been expended, before I was again able to make a fresh +one. Since then, however, we have been twice a little straitened. On +Friday evening we were in prospect of Saturday’s necessities, and had +nothing to meet them, except the money about which I was in doubt +from not having received directions from you. I had already used 5l. +out of the 10l. which had been sent, and now, after waiting till it +was actually needed, we thought it an indication, as none had been +sent, that this should all go to the Orphan-Houses. On Monday again +more money was needed than I had in hand, but we were in expectation +of help. After dinner, as nothing had come in, I thought it well to +open the boxes, thinking, that, although I had opened them so +recently, I had no right to presume that the Lord had not had time to +pour into them. The expectation was not in vain; for in the box at +the Boys’-Orphan-House I found 1l. 0s. 1 1/2d., in the box at the +Girls’-Orphan-House 7s. 1d. At the latter place I met sister A. who +gave me 3s. for things that she had sold. Thus we were most +graciously helped through Monday. Then, in the evening, at the +meeting I received from sister B. 2s., and through sister C. 11s. I +had opened the box at the Infant-Orphan-House on Monday, and found it +empty. But today, finding the 13s. insufficient, and being told that +something had been put in, I opened it, and found 3s. 6d., which +nicely helped us through. And we are now looking to the Lord for +more. In the mean time I shall this morning attend to the sale of +whatever has been given to be sold. It comforts us to know you are +praying for us," &c. + +The money which I had received yesterday and the day before yesterday +here, at Barnstaple, and two weeks ago at Teignmouth, enabled me now +to send off at once 5l. + +On Oct. 17th I returned to Bristol, with renewed strength, for active +service. + +Oct. 17. Bristol. The Lord has been again very gracious as it regards +the funds; for during the last three days, while I was at Barnstaple, +I received from a sister 5s., two rings, and a brooch. From another +sister a gold watch, to be sold for the Orphans. From a brother a +seal, two ear-rings, and a brooch. From a third sister sixteen books +to be sold; also 4l., the produce of a veil. From a fourth sister 2l. +10s., and from a fifth 1l., and from five others 8s. 9d. In addition +to this I found when I came home, that though my fellow-labourers had +been greatly tried a few days previous to my return, so much so, +that, when the 5l. arrived which I sent from Barnstaple, they were in +greater poverty than they ever had been; yet, within the last days, +several pounds had come in, and yesterday, over and above all this, +arrived 15l. from London for some articles which had been sent there +to be sold. What can we render unto the Lord for all His benefits! + +Oct. 19. The Lord is still pouring in bountifully! This morning 10l. +was sent from Worcester, and a sister brought 7l., being the produce +of the sale of ladies’ baskets, which she and some other sisters are +making for the benefit of the Orphans. This last case shows what +various means the Lord uses to provide for our need; yet all comes +without one single individual being asked to give help; for to the +Lord alone we speak about our need. We are now again comparatively +rich, i. e. we have means in hand to meet the current expenses of +about eight days, which has been only two or three times the case +during the last fifteen months. + +Oct. 30. A little boy brought me a letter, given to him by a +gentleman and lady in the street, as he said, to take to my house. +The letter contained these words with a five pound note: "The +enclosed 5l. accept for the benefit of the Orphans, in the name of +the Lord Jesus." + +Nov. 5. Today an Orphan was brought from Bath, and a lady sent by her +servant, the aunt of the child, a sovereign for the Orphans, when +there was but 3s. 11d. in hand. It has been thus repeatedly, that +when orphans have been brought, and we had no money, or scarcely any, +that the Lord sent a little with these poor children. It never is +with us any question, whether there is much or little money in hand, +so far as it regards the reception of children; but only, whether +there is room. + +Nov. 8. We are now again quite poor. The Lord gave us to know more +than usually from Oct. 17th to Oct. 31st what it is to abound, and +now we know again what it is to be poor. It would have been desirable +to have had 3l. today, but only 1l. 3s. 11d, was in hand, which I +sent off. In our need we were led to open the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, which had not been done for some weeks, and in them +was found 16s. 2 1/2d. To this one of the labourers added 9s. By this +2l. 9s. 1 1/2d. we could meet those expenses which needed to be met, +and we were thus helped through the day. + +Nov. 9. Saturday. 3l. 0s. 6d. was required today, in order +comfortably to meet the present demands, but not one penny was in +hand. Between ten and eleven I went to the Girls’-Orphan-House, to +meet with my fellow-labourers for prayer. Only 2s. had come in. This +was all I could leave. There was every thing in the houses which was +required for the moment, and I proposed that we should meet again for +prayer in the afternoon at four. When we did so, one of the labourers +gave 8s. 6d., another 10s., another 5s. 6d., so that I had as much to +give to the matrons as would provide comfortably all the necessaries +for the children till Monday morning; only the usual quantity of +bread could not be taken in. About half an hour, after we had +separated, came in 1l. 10s., the produce of the sale of a shawl, +which a sister from Devonshire had given for that purpose some days +since. Thus we had altogether 2l. 16s., whereas when the day +commenced we had no natural prospect of any thing. This is a new +sweet encouragement. Besides this, our Father has given us another +proof of His continued care, in that twenty sacks of potatoes and a +small barrel of herrings have been sent for the Orphans. + +Nov. 11. Monday morning. Yesterday, when, as just related, there was +not a penny in hand, there was given to me, with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, +ten shillings. This morning came in 1l. 10s, more, Soon afterwards a +note was sent to me from the Orphan-Houses, to say that the need of +today would be 3l. JUST WHILE I WAS READING THE NOTE I received +another, including a sovereign, which a sister from Devonshire had +given to one of the brethren for the Orphans. Thus I had just the 3l. +which was needed. A few minutes after came in 1s. more. + +Nov. 12. The need of today was 2l. As only 1s. had been left in hand +yesterday, and no more than 6s. had come in, we were again in a +strait. But I was not looking at the little in hand, but at the +fulness of God. I sent off the little which I had. In the afternoon +we met for prayer. I then found that 2s. 6d. had been taken out of +the box in the Infant-Orphan-House, and that 4s. more had come in by +the sale of some old books. To this one of the labourers added 2s. +3d., all she had of her own. After prayer came in 2s. 6d., which had +been given while we were in prayer. In the evening we met again for +prayer, when another labourer gave 3s. 4d. Thus, in our deep poverty, +we got together this day 1l. 0s. 7d., which supplied our absolute +necessities. We were this afternoon so reduced, till the Lord sent a +little help, that there were no means to provide breakfast for +tomorrow, for the children in the Boys’-Orphan-House. + +Nov. 13. Nothing has come in. Our need is even greater today than +yesterday, on account of our not having been able yesterday to take +in the usual quantity of provisions. In this our need I packed up the +books, which had been intended for sale on Aug. 22, when the Lord +sent such a rich, supply, before they were actually disposed of. To +them one of the labourers added some of his own, and a few other +articles. Also some old jackets, which had been sent, were packed up +to be disposed of. At twelve I met with my fellow-labourers for +prayer. + +There was every thing in the houses which was needed for dinner, but +there were no means to get milk for tea. (The children have milk and +water at tea time.) Three of my helpers went out to dispose of the +articles. At four in the afternoon I received the information that +14s. had come in, for some of the things which were disposed of. One +of my fellow-labourers had besides disposed of an article of his own +for 1l. 5s. This 1l. 19s. enabled us to take in bread as usual, and +to defray the other necessary expenses. We had never been lower in +means than yesterday and today. Yet my soul, thanks to the Lord! was +also yesterday and today in perfect peace. My helpers seem also quite +in peace. This evening I received 2s. 6d., and 11s. with Ecclesiastes +ix. 10. This little money is as precious, as at other times 100l. +would have been, because it is a fresh proof that our Father still +cares for us. The money was given to me just after I had been +speaking on these words: "But I am poor and needy; yet the Lord +thinketh upon me." Whilst speaking I was able, in a measure, to +realize the preciousness of the truth contained in those words, and +after speaking my Father gave me a fresh proof that He is thinking +upon me. + +Nov. 14. I took the 13s. 6d. which was given last evening, early this +morning, to the Orphan-Houses, where I found that 10s. 6d. had come +in by the sale of a Hebrew Old and a Greek New Testament, which a +brother had given who had more than one copy; and 1s. 6d. for another +book. This 1l. 5s. 6d. has been divided, in the hope that our kind +Father will remember us before the day is over, and send in more. +This afternoon, when we met for prayer, I found that 18s. more had +come in for some articles which had been sold. We have had thus 2l. +3s. 6d. this day to divide for housekeeping. By the good hand of the +Lord upon us, there has been every thing really needful. May the Lord +look upon us, and help us further! Surely, He will do it! + +Nov. 15. We are still in deep poverty. Nothing had come in by four +o’clock in the afternoon, when I went to meet with my fellow-labourers +for prayer. I did not go in the morning, because I knew that +there was every thing which was needed till the afternoon. When +I came I found that a sister had given 2s. 6d.; a new Bible +which one of the labourers had given, who had more than one old copy, +had been sold for 10s.; also 2s. had come in, and 1s. 4d. for some +other articles which had been sold. This 15s. 10d. supplied that +which was absolutely needed for today. We are still of good courage. +We are sure that the Lord, in His own time, will deliver us out of +the trial; for were our poverty more than a trial of faith, had the +Lord in anger shut up His hands, we should not receive any thing at +all. But this is not the case. For even this very day two sacks of +potatoes were sent by the same brother who sent twenty sacks a few +days since, with the promise to send still more. We have no means to +lay in a stock for the winter, else we should have bought, perhaps, +fifty or sixty sacks; but our kind Father does it for us. There has +been also a toy chest of drawers promised for sale. + +Nov. 16. Our prayer was last evening, in particular, respecting the +necessities of today, as two days’ provisions would be needed, it +being Saturday. Besides this, about 2l. 10s. was needed to pay the +weekly salaries of the brethren and sisters who labour in the +Day-Schools. For all these demands there was nothing in hand, nor +have we any more needless articles to dispose of; and useful ones we +do not consider it right to sell, as our Father knows our need. When +we met about twelve o’clock this morning, I found that last evening +there had been Bibles unexpectedly sold to the amount of 1l. 11s. +6d., and about 10s. had been given besides. Thus we had nearly enough +for the School-Fund. Moreover, 15s. had come in for the Orphan-Fund. +A large sea-chest was given by a brother several months since, for +the benefit of the Orphans, which had never been disposed of, and +which, in this our great need, was sold for 15s. Yet this 15s. was +needed to pay what was due for washing; and, therefore, we had still +nothing to take in provisions with. It occurred to one of the +labourers, that there might be a little advanced on his watch, of the +money which had been laid by for rent, as had once or twice before +been done; and that the watch might be sold at quarter-day, in case +there should not come in enough to make up the deficiency. Yet even +this plan we did not any longer think to be quite Scriptural, as he +needs the watch in the Lord’s service, and as our Lord is so kind, +that He would otherwise send us means, were it well for us. In short, +it appeared to us quite clear, that while we ought, in such a strait, +to dispose of things which we do not need, nothing ought to be +disposed of which is needed, in order that the Lord’s own deliverance +might be so much the more manifest. All we could think of for sale +was five pewter dishes, which had been given nearly four years ago, +but which were never used, as they were not convenient. These we +agreed should be sold. About four o’clock this afternoon I received +2l. 2s., which a brother and sister had brought from Leicestershire. +With this I went joyfully to the Orphan-Houses. There I found that +9s. 6d. had come in for the pewter dishes; one of the labourers had +given 10s. for the Orphans, and 10s. for the School-Fund. (There had +come in 2s. more for the other funds. All demands were met, and there +was 1s. 6d. over.) Besides this, one of the labourers had sold a book +of his own for 4s., and another labourer gave two pairs of new +gloves, and four gentlemen’s stocks. One pair of the gloves had been +sold. Thus altogether had come in 4l. 2s. 3d., and therefore about +1l. 10s. more than was needed. We are now brought to the close of one +more week. This has been, perhaps, of all the weeks the most trying. +So much prayer, and so little coming in, I never knew. Yet, by the +grace of God, I was sure that help would come, after the trial of +faith was over. During the whole of this week, greatly as we have +been tried, and though twice no stock of bread could be taken in, yet +there has been nourishing food at every meal, and neither the +children nor any other person can have perceived our poverty. About +13l. has been spent even this week for housekeeping in the three +Orphan-Houses. + +Nov. 18. Monday. The Lord has kindly sent in since Saturday evening +3l. 18s. 3 1/4d., and thus our need for today is supplied. On +Saturday evening the produce of an orphan-box, 5s. 1 1/4d., was +given; and last evening a sister gave two sovereigns to brother +Craik, waiting for him a long time in the chapel, till she could see +him. She might have delayed giving it till another time, as she had +to wait so long; but the Lord knew our need. There were also sent +eight sack of potatoes, by the same brother who had sent twenty-two +sacks before. + +Nov. 19. As there was not enough money in hand for the necessities of +today, we were again as poor as on Saturday. Between three and four +in the afternoon the milk is generally taken in; but in the +Boys’-Orphan-House there was not money enough to meet this small +expense. However, the Lord knew our need, and sent us at two o’clock +13s., which helped us comfortably through the day. A sister had +purposed in her heart to give 3d. a week for the Orphans, and she +felt herself stirred up to bring the yearly amount now, in this our +extremity. + +Nov. 20. This has been a day of deep poverty. Nothing but the 13s., +above referred to, came in yesterday, which was scarcely enough to +meet yesterday’s usual need. My mind, by the grace of God, was not at +all cast down; but I felt it rather trying, that the abundance of my +other engagements had not allowed me to meet with my fellow-labourers, +either yesterday or today, for prayer. This evening I had a +note from the Boys’-Orphan-House, to state that a lady had +sent two dozen of boys’ shirts, which she had made herself, with +which she sent 5s. to get them washed. This 5s, enabled us to meet +that which was absolutely needful. [I mention here, that while our +usual current expenses are about 2l. 10s. daily for housekeeping in +the three houses; yet we might, in case of need, do for one or two +days with as little as yesterday and today, as there are generally +potatoes and meat in the house, and a stock of bread for two days, in +order that the children may eat stale bread.] Without this 5s. we +should have been unable to procure all that was absolutely needed. +This our kind Father knew, and therefore He sent it. There were also +given two quarterns of bread by one of the bakers, which made up the +usual quantity. Moreover five and a half sacks of potatoes were sent +by the brother who sent the others, making in all 35 1/2 sacks. + +Nov. 21. This morning one of the labourers gave 7s., in order that +there might be means to take in milk. Between ten and eleven o’clock +we met for prayer, and I found that 10s. had come in for a toy chest +of drawers, which in this our great need had been sent for sale. +Besides this 6d. had been taken out of the box in the Infant-Orphan-House. +This 17s. 6d. enabled us to provide the dinner, and to take in a +little bread in two houses, even as much as would be enough for +breakfast tomorrow; but there was 4s. 6d. needed to buy bread +for the Boys’-Orphan-House, as there was only enough for today. +When we met again this afternoon, 3s. had come in, as one of the +labourers had sold a few old books. Another labourer gave 1s. 6d., +and thus we had also the 4s. 6d., which was needed for bread. After +prayer, it was mentioned that a sister, a servant, who is out of a +situation, had been this afternoon to see the Orphan-Houses, and had +put something into the box at the Girls’-Orphan-House. The box was +opened, and half-a-crown was found in it. This money was, in our deep +poverty, as acceptable as 50l. at other times might have been. We +rejoiced when we saw it, for it was a fresh proof to us, that, not in +anger, but only for the trial of our faith, we are so poor. This 2s. +6d. provides us with the means to take in milk tomorrow morning, so +that we shall have everything which is needed till after breakfast +tomorrow, but then there is neither bread, nor meat, etc. remaining +for dinner. Our comfort, however, is: "The morrow shall take thought +for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil +thereof." Matt. vi. 34. We separated very happy in God, though very +poor, and our faith much tried. + +Nov. 22. Our poverty had now become very great. Greater it had never +been. Yet, the Lord be praised! I was as comfortable as ever; for I +was sure we were only for the trial of our faith in this state. Had +the Lord shut up His hand iii anger, He would not have continued to +give us, even during this week, from time to time, tokens of His care +over us. I said this morning: "Man’s necessity is God’s opportunity" +is a proverb of the world, and how much more may we, His children, +now look to Him in our great need. I knew we must have help in some +way, as now it had come to the greatest extremity, there being in +none of the houses anything for dinner, except potatoes, of which we +have an abundance. At ten this morning I was informed that a large +box, bearing my address, had arrived at one of the Orphan-Houses. I +set off immediately, and found it was from the neighbourhood of +Wolverhampton. It contained 12l. for the Orphans, 1l. 11s. 10d. for +the other Funds, 4 yards of flannel, 9 yards of calico, 12 yards of +print, 4 1/2 yards of coloured cotton, 4 yards of stuff, 2 pairs of +stockings, and 3 1/4 yards of brown holland. Besides this, there were +in it the following articles for sale: 2 decanters and stands, 4 +glass salt cellars, 3 scent bottles, a set of cruets and stand, 5 +beer glasses, 7 chimney ornaments, 3 tortoise-shell combs, 3 fans, 2 +silver vinaigrettes, 2 silver shoe-buckles, 2 waist buckles, 2 silver +salt-cellars, 1 pair of knives and forks with silver handles, a small +silver toasting fork, 9 silver coins, three gold rings, 4 pairs of +ear-rings, 3 brooches, a cornelian heart, a silver seal, 1 pair of +silver studs, 1 gold watch key, 1 silver pencil case, 5 pairs of +bracelets, 5 necklaces and 1 urn rug. The joy which I and my +fellowlabourers had when all these things lay before us, cannot be +described; it must be experienced in order that it may be known. It +was two hours and a half before the dinner time, when the help was +granted. The Lord knew that the Orphans had no dinner, and, +therefore, did He now send help.--This morning also a brother sent to +the Girls’ Orphan-House to ask whether the treacle-cask was empty, +and if so, to send it by the messenger, that it might be filled. + +Nov. 24. Today 5l. came in again with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, besides +1l. 10s. for the rents. + +Nov. 27. Today again some money was needed for housekeeping. But as a +little had come in yesterday and today, we had enough. + +Nov. 28. Last evening 10s. came in, which was just enough to supply +this day’s need. We are now again penniless. + +Nov. 29. A great part of the articles, which were sent this day week +from the neighbourhood of Wolverhampton, have now been disposed of +for 5l. 11s.; we are, therefore, supplied for today and tomorrow. + +Dec. 2. Since the last money has been given out for housekeeping, +only 1l. 12s. has come in but as 1l. 10s. of this had been given for +the rents, I had only 2s. in hand, when brother B., the master at the +Boys’-Orphan-House, came this morning, and told me that the need of +today would be at least 2l. I gave him the 2s. which I had, and +proposed that we should pray together for more means. WHILE WE WERE +IN PRAYER, a brother called. After prayer brother B. left me, and the +brother who had come gave me 5l. As soon as he had left, I went +joyfully with the money to the Orphan-Houses, to prevent the bakers +being sent away. This evening I received still further 2l. Thus the +Lord has richly supplied our need for today and tomorrow. + +Dec. 3. The Lord has remembered again our need for tomorrow. I +received today from Liverpool 15s.; and from a brother in the +neighbourhood of London, who had been staying here for a season, 5l.; +also 1l. by the sale of some articles. + +Dec. 4. It has been repeatedly our prayer during the last month and +in the beginning of this, that the Lord would be pleased to give us +again so much means, before the time of the public meetings, which +are fixed for the 10th, 11th, and 12th, of this month, that, when we +speak about His dealings with us during this year, we might also +respecting the close of it have again to speak, to His praise, of the +abundance which we had in hand. At the end of last year we made the +same request, and the Lord granted it. Now today, as an answer to +this our often repeated request, I received from the East Indies +100l., to be laid out for the Orphans, or the other objects of the +Institution. Respecting this money it is to be noticed: 1. The great +distance from whence it is sent. 2. That it comes just now, and thus +enables us to speak at the meetings of this rich supply after our +trials. 3. It furnishes us with means to order Bibles, as one half of +the money will be taken for the other funds; there having been a +great inquiry for Bibles lately, and we have not been able to meet +the demand, for want of means. Respecting this point also we have +prayed repeatedly, and now the Lord has answered our petition. How +very precious it is to wait on the Lord! What an abundant proof have +we in this donation, that all our late straits, as it regards means, +were only allowed for the trial of our faith! This evening came in +still further 1l. 5s. + +Dec. 9. Since Dec. 4 several small donations have come in, so that +unto the last day of this fourth year of the Orphan-work the Lord has +continued His kindness to us. + +On Dec. 10, 11, and 12 we had public meetings, at which the account +of the Lord’s dealings with us in reference to the Orphan-Houses and +the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution was given. +During the whole of the past year, as formerly, the labourers who are +engaged in the work had kept their trials and their joys of faith to +themselves; but now we considered the time to have come, when, for +the benefit of the church at large, and to the glory of our Lord, we +should make our boast in Him.--It is now (i. e. on Dec. 10, 1839) five +years and nine months since the Scriptural Knowledge Institution has +been in operation. In addition to what has been said about the Lord’s +dealings with us, more especially in regard to the funds, I make a +few more remarks, with reference to His kindness to us, in other +respects, during the last year. 1. During the last year also we have +been enabled to continue to provide all the needful expenses +connected with the six Day-Schools, three for boys and three for +girls. The number of the children, who are at present in them, +amounts to 286. The number of all the children that have had +schooling in the Day Schools, through the medium of the Institution, +since its formation, amounts to 1795. 2. There are at present 226 +children in the Sunday School. 3. There are 14 taught to read in the +Adult School, and there have been about 130 adults instructed in that +School, since the formation of the Institution. 4. There have been +circulated during the last year 514 copies of the Scriptures, and +5592 since March 5, 1834. 5. There has been laid out during the last +year 91l. 6s. for Missionary purposes. 6. There have been received +into the three Orphan-Houses from Dec. 9, 1838, to Dec. 9, 1839, 16 +orphans. There are at present 96 orphans in the three houses. The +number of all the orphans, who have been under our care from April +11, 1836, to Dec. 9, 1839, amounts to 126. + +I notice further the following points in connexion with the +Orphan-Houses. + +1. Without any one having been asked for any thing by us, the sum of +3,067l. 8s. 9 1/4d. has been given to us, entirely as the result of +prayer to God, from the commencement of the work up to Dec. 9, 1839. +2. Besides this, there have also been sent many articles of clothing, +furniture, and provisions, for the use of the Orphans. 3. Without our +solicitation, three medical gentlemen (one for each house), have up +to this time, kindly given their attendance and medicines +gratuitously. 4. The hand of God is most manifest in that we have had +so little sickness, considering that so many persons during this +autumn have been suffering from fever, etc. Even in this particular I +desire publicly to acknowledge the Lord’s peculiar kindness to us. 5. +Though most of the children have been brought up in a very different +manner from what we could desire, yet the Lord has constrained them, +on the whole, during this year also, to behave exceedingly well, so +much so that it has continued to attract the attention of all +observers. 6. That, however, which gives us the chief ground for +thankfulness, so far as the children are concerned, is, that in eight +of them we perceive decided proofs of a real change of heart and of +faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, so that they have been received into +church fellowship. We are not surprised that these children, who are +from 9 years old and upwards, have been converted; for the conversion +of the orphans under our care has been a frequent subject of prayer +among us, and that of late more than ever; so that we fully expect, +if the Lord shall continue to give prayer for them, that soon many +more will be brought to believe in the Lord Jesus. + +The total of the expenses, connected with the objects of the +Institution, exclusive of the Orphan-Houses, from Nov. 19, 1838, to +Nov. 19, 1839, is 542l. 13s. The balance in hand on Nov. 19, 1839, +was 18s. 5d. The total of the expenses connected with the three +Orphan-Houses, from Dec. 9, 1838, to Dec. 9, 1839, is 960l. 9s. 2 +3/4d. The balance in hand on Dec 9, 1839, was 46l. 8s. ld. + +Dec. 24. This morning we wanted again more money for the Orphans than +there was in hand. It is only eight days since the last public +meeting, when there was a balance of 46l. 8s. ld. in hand. On this +account we disposed of some silver articles and books which had been +sent within the last days for the benefit of the Orphans, by which +means we have enough for today and tomorrow. + +Dec. 31. My health is much better than for years. My mental powers +also are as good as they have been at any time during the last three +years. I ascribe this to God’s blessing, through the instrumentality +of early rising, and plunging my head into cold water when I rise. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1839. + + + +I. As to the church--68 brethren and sisters brother Craik and I +found in fellowship when we came to Bristol. + +573 have been admitted to fellowship since we came to Bristol. + +641 would be, therefore, the total number of those in fellowship with +us, had there been no changes. But + +40 have fallen asleep; + +33 are under church discipline + +55 saints have left Bristol; + +38 have left us, but are still in Bristol; + +166 are therefore to be deducted from 641, so that there are only 475 +at present in fellowship with us. + + + +During the last year have been added 115, of whom 34 have been +brought to the knowledge of the Lord among us. + + + +II. As to my temporal supplies. + +The Lord has been pleased to give me during the past year + +1. By the Freewill Offerings through the boxes £137 4s. 5d. + +2. By Presents in money, from saints residing in and out of Bristol +£121 18s. 0d. + +3. By Money through family connexion £42 0s. 0d. + +4. By Presents in clothes, provisions, &c., which were worth to us at +least £12 0s. 0d. + +Altogether £313 2s. 5d. + + + +January 1, 1840. Our usual meeting last night was most precious! We +continued together from seven till half-past twelve. Of all the +similar meetings which we have had, it was, according to my judgment, +by far the best. Not more than five prayed; but there was much more +real prayer than at former meetings.--This morning, about one hour +after midnight, when our prayer meeting was over, I received a paper +with some money sealed up in it for the Orphans. A few minutes +afterwards I remembered that the individual who gave it was in debt, +and I was aware she had been repeatedly asked by her creditors for +payment; I resolved therefore, with out opening the paper, to return +it, as no one has a right to give whilst in debt. This was done when +I knew that there was not enough in hand to meet the expences of the +day. About eight this morning a brother brought 5l., which he had +received just then from his mother, for the Orphans. Observe, the +brother is led to bring it at once! The Lord knew our need, and +therefore this brother could not delay bringing the money. A few +hours after I received 5l. more, and 8s. 5d., also 2s. 6d., so that +we are now again supplied for three or four days. + +Jan. 5. Besides the 10l. 10s. 11d, which came in on New-year’s day, +there came in on the 2nd and 4th 3l. 0s. 7d. But when now we were +again without a penny, there came in 5s., and 6d., and 1s. Also 2l. +with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, and 1l. 10s. for rent. + +Jan. 7. Today, when there were again only a few shillings in hand, as +since the 5th had come in only 3s., I gave myself to prayer, when, +just after I had risen from my knees, a sister came and brought 1l., +as a thank-offering to the Lord for the many mercies of the past +year. There came in still further today, by ten different donations +and the sale of two Reports, 2l. 17s. + +Jan. 8. There were only a few shillings more in hand than was needed +for housekeeping today. Nevertheless our kind Father remembered us +before the day was over. A sister, a servant, gave me 15s.; also with +Ecclesiastes ix. 10, came in 5l. 5s., from two sisters 6s, ld., and +by sale of Reports 3s. + +Jan. 22. I have repeatedly asked the Lord for means to be able to +order more Bibles, as two sorts were again exhausted. There is +moreover scarcely enough money in hand to pay the teachers next +Saturday. This afternoon I received from a sister 14l. 2s. 7d., which +she had had in the Savings’ Bank. She considered that this money +would be better used in the Lord’s work, than left in the Savings’ +Bank. Thus I was enabled to order some Bibles. + +From Jan. 8th to 22nd came in 34l. 9s. 5d. for the Orphans, and the +donations were so seasonable, that always either something was given, +or articles which had been given for sale could be disposed of, +before the last money had been expended. But as there was today again +only very little in hand, I was led to open the orphan-box in my +house, in which I found two papers, the one containing 10s., the +other a 5l. note. In both papers was written Eccles. ix. 10. There +came in today still further above 5l. Thus our Lord has sent us what +we are likely to need for three or four days to come. + +Jan. 25. I have been much in prayer this week about going to Germany: +1, To see certain brethren who purpose to go as Missionaries to the +East Indies; and 2, To see my father once more. I am led to go just +now, instead of delaying it, because my health is again so failing, +that it seems desirable I should leave Bristol at all events, and +thus I could continue to serve in the work of the Lord, and yet +attend to the benefit of my health at the same time. Lord, keep me +from making a mistake in this matter! + +Jan, 31, Since Jan. 22 several small donations came in for the +Orphans, and several pounds by the sale of silver articles, trinkets, +&c. But as I have had to pay out today 11l. 13s., we are now again +very poor. For many days past we have been so helped, that money has +always come in, before all was spent. Now there is only 1s. 5d. in +hand. The Lord will provide! I feel quite comfortable, though in +three days I shall have to leave the work for several week.--About +three hours after I had written the above, came in 1l. 14s. l 1/2d. +In the afternoon I received still further from Tottenham for the +Orphans 10l., and in the evening from Hereford 30l., of which latter +sum there was 6l. for the Orphans, and 24l. for the other objects of +the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. Thus the Lord will kindly allow +me to leave a little money behind on my departure, and I have also a +still further answer to my prayer for means to purchase Bibles, for +which I have asked the Lord repeatedly, and which he began to answer +by the donation which I received on the 22nd. I have received 5l. +besides for the other objects. + +Feb. 1. I have now felt quite sure for several days past, that I +should leave Bristol for a season, and go to Germany. If the Lord +permit, I shall leave the day after tomorrow. + +Feb. 2. Today and yesterday has come in still further, before my +departure, nearly 9l. for the Orphans. How kind of the Lord to send +this money just now, on the eve of my leaving home! + +Feb. 3. Today I left Bristol for Berlin. + +On Feb. 5th I left London in the steamer for Hamburg. Though it had +been so very stormy for several weeks past, the Lord gate us a very +favourable passage; the first, as the captain said, which they had +had for several weeks. We landed at Hamburg on the 7th at five in the +afternoon. The porter who carried my things led me, as I afterwards +found out, some by-way, either to save a long distance, or to get me +into the city with my luggage, though it was after the custom-house +hours. I did not understand this at first; but, when we were about to +enter the city, he told me that that was not the proper way, but that +if I would give to the custom-house officer, whom I should presently +see at the entrance into the city, a small fee, he would let me pass. +My reply was that I did not wish to do what was unlawful, nor should +I give a fee to encourage what was unlawful, and that I would rather +go a long way round, than get by such means into the city. Presently +we arrived at the place at which the custom-house officer stood, who, +on my telling him plainly that I had not the least wish to pass that +way, if it were unlawful, saw that I was only a passenger, and that I +had no wish to get into the city with goods which are not duty free, +and therefore let me pass. This little circumstance proves afresh in +how many little things the children of God may act differently from +the world, to the glory of their Father, and how in going the Lord’s +way, we find it to be, even as far as this life is concerned, the +easiest path.--About half an hour after, when I arrived at the hotel, +a little circumstance served afresh to remind me, that the Christian, +like the bee, might suck honey out of every flower. I saw upon a +snuffer-stand in bas-relief, "A heart, a cross under it, and roses +under both." The meaning was obviously this, that the heart which +bears the cross for a time meets with roses afterwards. I applied it +to myself, and this little event greatly cheered my heart in this +place, where I was without the fellowship of a single believer. + +I left Hamburg in the evening of Feb. 8th, travelled all night, all +day, and the whole of the second night, and reached Berlin on the +morning of the 10th. I confessed not the Lord Jesus on this long +journey, which I record here to my shame; nor did I give any other +testimony for Jesus in the steamer, than merely refraining from the +light and trifling conversation of the party, and all this after I +had had on my way from Bristol to London a fresh encouragement in +conversing with a gay traveller addicted to drinking, who evidently +listened with a measure of attention, and with a desire of having his +chains broken. + +From Feb. 10th to 20th I was in Berlin. I think it is likely that +eight or nine brethren and sisters will go from hence to the East +Indies.--After having been greatly helped by the Lord in my work, the +first and special object of my journey to the Continent; mercifully +kept by Him in the narrow path and in great peace, whilst surrounded +with temptations on every side; and after having also seen afresh +abundant reason to praise the Lord for all the way in which He had +led me since I lived here in 1828 and 1829; I left Berlin on the +evening of Feb. 20th for Magdeburg, which I reached on the morning of +the 21st, and on the same evening I arrived at my father’s house.--In +all human probability I now see my dear father the last time. He is +evidently much weaker than he was two years ago, and coughs much +more. What has the Lord done for me since I lived in the house where +I am now! The two rooms where I am now most in prayer, reading the +Word, and confessing His name, were those very rooms in which I +sinned most, whilst living here many years ago. I have had again +opportunity, most fully to bring out the truth about the work of the +Lord Jesus before my father, whilst conversing a long time with a +woman in his hearing, to whom I showed from the Scriptures, that we +are to be saved, not by our own works, but simply by faith in the +Lord Jesus, who bore the punishment instead of us, and who fulfilled +the law in our room. + +Feb. 24 and 25. I am still at Heimersleben. My dear father is very +weak. + +Feb. 26. This morning I left Heimersleben. I took leave of my father +most probably for the last time. It has been a great pleasure to me, +and I consider it a great privilege, to have been permitted by the +Lord once more to see my father, once more personally to show him +filial love and regard, and once more to set the truth before him. He +has been again during the whole of this my stay most affectionate to +me, as he was during my two former visits to him since I left the +Continent to reside in England. How cheerfully should I have left him +this morning, did I know him to be safe in Jesus! But, alas! he as +yet is not resting upon Christ, though he is so far religious as to +read prayers and the Bible.--After I had left him I went to my +faithful and beloved friend, brother Stahlschmidt, at Sandersleben, +but found him absent from home. + +Brother Kroll, the servant of brother Stahlschmidt, [whom I have +mentioned in the first part of my Narrative,] received me with much +affection. When this brother first came to Sandersleben in 1829, +there was scarcely a single true Christian besides his master in the +little town. Soon afterwards he began to hold meetings, which were +attended by the two or three who loved the Lord Jesus. These meetings +were for a long time suffered to go on quietly; but when the Lord +blessed them, and others were stirred up to care about their souls, +brother Kroll had to appear before the magistrates, and was forbidden +to hold them. When this was of no effect, (as he considered that he +ought only to obey earthly rulers in things in which he could do so +with a good conscience,) and they continued still to meet together, +the police came into one of their meetings, and forced them to +discontinue it. When even this availed nothing, the brethren were +finally threatened that every one who attended these meetings should +pay three thalers, and every one who read or spoke at them should pay +five, which is a large sum in Germany for poor people. But +notwithstanding all these obstacles, the few poor saints continue +their meetings, but in secret, to be unmolested by the police. They +have now neither a stated place nor a fixed time for their meetings. +On the second and third evenings, whilst I was at Sandersleben, I met +with them. On the second evening we were in the room of a poor +weaver. The dear brethren would have me sit on the only chair which +was in the room. It was a very small room, perhaps twice as large as +the loom, which was in it. There were about twenty-five or thirty +persons present, many of whom had seated themselves in and under the +loom, and the rest sat on two or three little forms. These meetings +were very precious. The very fact of going to them with the feeling +of having to pay the fine, or to suffer an adequate imprisonment, +should one be found there, makes them to be doubly valued; and I +believe that the Lord’s double blessing rests upon them. I spoke long +both times; indeed, as long as I had strength, and the dear people +seemed to eat the Word.--I have so circumstantially related these +facts, that thereby the children of God in Great Britain may be led +more highly to value their religious privileges, and to make good use +of them whilst they are continued. + +It is worthy of remark, that while the meeting at Sandersleben were +permitted to continue, there was no believing clergyman in the little +town; but about the time that they were forbidden, the Lord sent a +brother who truly preaches the gospel. I had for some hours refeshing +and most affectionate brotherly intercourse with Him. May the Lord +let His blessing rest upon him, and help him to be a faithful witness +for God in that dark neighbourhood! + +I had travelled so fast, and stayed so short a time in the places +where I had been, that I was obliged to leave Heimersleben without +having received the letter which I had expected from my wife there, a +matter of no small trial (as those who have been for some time at a +great distance from home, know it to be); especially in my case, as, +on account of the Orphans and the other work, besides my family, it +was of so much importance for me to hear from time to time. I had +arranged with my father to have the letter sent to me to +Sandersleben, by an express messenger, who could be obtained for a +small remuneration. However, hour after hour passed away, on the +27th, and the messenger did not arrive. At last the time was gone by, +as it was getting dark, and the person ought to have come at noon. I +now lifted up my heart to the Lord, beseeching Him to give me grace +to give up my own will in this thing. No sooner had I been brought +into such a state, as to be TRULY content and satisfied with the will +of the Lord in this matter, than the expected letter was handed over +to me. The woman who brought it had lost her way in the morning, on +account of a dense fog, which made her so late. I have frequently +found, under similar circumstances, that after I had been brought +into such a state as to be willing to give up my own will, whereby I +was fitted to bear the blessing, the Lord gave me the desire of my +heart, according to the truth of that word: "Delight thyself also in +the Lord, and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart." Psalm +xxxvii. 4. + +Feb. 29. This morning I left Sandersleben. Towards the evening I +reached Halberstadt, the town where I was from Easter 1816 to June +1821, at the Cathedral Classical School. I went to a certain small +inn, known to me from the time that I lived at Halberstadt, both for +the sake of quietness and to save expense, as I knew it to be more +like a private boarding-house than an inn. After having had my +supper, the innkeeper, who seemed to me a quiet and unassuming +person, came into the room where I was, and began conversation with +me. After a few moments I recognised in him a former schoolfellow of +mine. The Lord now enabled me to tell him of my gay life, my +conversion, my subsequent going to England, and of some of the Lord’s +dealings with me there. He listened with great attention, and was +evidently affected by what I said. May the Lord bless to him my +testimony for Jesus! I was thus afresh reminded of what grace has +done for me. How kind of the Lord to direct me to that place! + +March 1. This morning I saw an old friend of mine, a missionary to +the Jews at Halberstadt. When first he went there he held meetings, +which the few Christians of the town attended; but of late he has +been obliged by the police to give them up. In that town of about +15,000 inhabitants, with, I think, seven large Protestant churches, +there is not one converted clergyman, as this brother told me; and +the few Christians that are there are not permitted to assemble +themselves together. Brethren, you who live in Great Britain, be +thankful for your religious liberty, and make use of it while the +days of outward peace last!--About twelve this morning I left by the +mail for Brunswick. The Lord enabled me to preach Christ to a young +man, a painter, who, for the sake of improvement in his art, had +travelled far and wide, and was now returning home from Vienna to his +parents. He listened very attentively, in which I had a fresh proof +that one never ought to look at natural appearances in proclaiming +the truth; for I judged, before I began to speak to him, from his gay +appearance, that he would quite laugh at what I might tell him about +Jesus.--I saw again this afternoon, at Wolfenbuttel the inn from +whence I ran away, when in debt, in the year 1821, and praised the +Lord for His goodness to me since that time. Now, this evening, I am +at Brunswick, and shall have again, through the Lord’s kindness, rest +during the night, as the mail does not leave for Hamburg until nine +tomorrow morning. + +March 8. London. I left Brunswick on the 2nd, and arrived at Hamburg +in 24 hours. As there was ice in the Elbe, the London steamer could +not get up to Hamburg, and I had therefore to go alone, in a hired +carriage to Cuxhaven, about eighty miles, the most expensive journey +that ever I made in my life, for it cost above 3l. 10s. Thus I had to +travel three days and two nights, with the interruption of only five +hours at Hamburg. I reached Cuxhaven at half-past eight in the +evening on March 4th.--The fact of having thus to travel from Hamburg +to Cuxhaven, that being the only way in which I could have got there +in my circumstances, without losing the steamer, showed me afresh how +one is step by step cast upon the Lord. A month since the Elbe was +cleared of ice, and now, contrary to the expectation of all, the cold +had returned to such a degree, that it was a second time innavigable. + +March 3. I embarked this morning for London. I had conversation with +two Russian Jews, who listened with great interest to all I said to +them; but I did not tell them plainly that I believed Jesus of +Nazareth to be the Messiah, as I fully purposed to do at the next +conversation. After I had left them, they conversed with each other, +and I could see from their countenances, that they either took me for +a baptized Jew, or for a missionary to the Jews, on account of the +peculiar way in which I had conversed with them. Presently one of +them came and asked me what I thought of that Jesus. No sooner had I +owned Him as the true Messiah and as my Lord and my God, than he +began to blaspheme; and from that time, as long as we were on board, +they shunned me; and I also felt that all I had to do was to show +kindness to them by actions, but no more to converse with them about +the Messiah, in order to keep them from blaspheming that holy name +which is dear to my heart. My conversation with them had, however, an +unexpected effect in another way. At the dinner table I was asked by +one of the passengers about those Jews, who they were, etc., as my +long conversation with them on the deck had been noticed. This led +me, (in order that the conversation might be turned to profitable +subjects, and that I might discover whether there was a Christian at +the table), to throw out the remark, "how remarkable it is that the +Jews, in all parts of the world, can be recognised as such; and are +not mixed with other nations," etc. Immediately the captain replied, +"this can only be explained by the Scriptures, and shows the Bible to +be true," or something to that effect. I now, in agreeing with the +captain, followed up the subject, and both after dinner and +repeatedly during the passage had long and most interesting +conversations with the captain, whom I found to be a true brother in +the Lord, and from whom I separated most affectionately on our +arrival in London. + +On March 7th I landed in London, where I found two letters from my +dear wife, from which I saw that up to the last the Lord had been +dealing with her, as well as with me, in the greatest kindness, and +had given also an abundance for the Orphans during the whole time of +my absence. + +March 9. I left London this morning, arrived this evening in peace in +Bristol, and found my dearest Mary and all in peace. Truly, the Lord +has abundantly blessed me and them while I have been from home! + +During the whole time of my absence the Lord not only supplied all +the need of the Orphans, but on my return I found more in hand than +there was when I left. The donations, which came in during my +absence, amount to between 80l. and 90l. + +March 11. Today I received 19l. 19s., being a legacy left to me by a +brother who fell asleep the beginning of last December. How richly +does the Lord supply all my own temporal necessities! + +March 22. Today, when there was not a penny in hand for the Orphans, +I received the following donations: 3l. as the produce of the sale of +ladies’ baskets, an old crown piece, an old half-crown piece, and a +Spanish dollar. Also 1s. With Eccles. ix. 10, was given 2l. 10s. + +March 23. Today came in still further 1l. 2s. 6d. + +March 25. All money was now again given out, when today came in by +the sale of Reports 8s. 9d., and in small donations 1l. 5s. 11d. + +March 26. On the 17th of this month 1 received the following letter, +from a brother who several times had been used by the Lord as an +instrument in supplying our need, and who also two months since sent +30l. + +"I have received a little money from ----. Have you any present need +for the Institution under your care? I know you do not ask, except +indeed of Him whose work you are doing; but to answer when asked +seems another thing, and a right thing. I have a reason for desiring +to know the present state of your means towards the objects you are +labouring to serve: viz, should you not have need, other departments +of the Lord’s work or other people of the Lord may have need. Kindly +then inform me, and to what amount, i. e. what amount you at this +present time need, or can profitably lay out." + +At the time when this letter came, we were indeed in need, or at +least it was desirable, as far as I had light, to have means, as I +was just on the point of establishing an Infant-School, and as again +some sorts of Bibles were needed in order to go on with the +circulation of the Scriptures. Also in the Orphan-Fund there was only +2s. 3 1/2d. Nevertheless I considered that, as I have hitherto acted, +(i. e. telling the Lord alone about our need), I ought to continue to +do, as otherwise the principal object of the work, to be a help to +the saints generally, by seeking to lead them to increased dependence +upon God alone, through this Institution, would be frustrated. I +answered therefore the letter, in substance, as follows: + +"Whilst I thank you for your love, and whilst I agree with you, that, +in general, there is a difference between asking for money, and +answering when asked, nevertheless in our case I feel not at liberty +to speak about the state of our funds, as the primary object of the +work in my hands is, to lead those who are weak in faith to see that +there is reality in dealing with God alone." + +After having sent off the answer, I was again and again led to pray +to the Lord in this way: "Lord, thou knowest that for Thy sake I did +not tell this brother about our need. Now, Lord, show afresh that +there is reality in speaking to Thee only about our need, and speak +therefore to this brother, so that he may help us." + +Today, in answer to this my request, this brother sent 100l., of +which sum I shall take 20l. for the Orphans, and 20l.. for each of +the other objects. Thus I have means for establishing the +Infant-School, and for ordering more Bibles. Also the Orphans are +again supplied for a week; for when the money came in there was not +one penny in hand for them. + +April 7. This evening I received information from my little half +brother that my dear father died on March 30th. He was taken worse a +few days after I left him. How kind of the Lord to have allowed me +once more to see him! Had I gone to Germany at the time I first +intended, he would most likely not have been alive to see me.--As I +know not of one believer in the whole town where he lived, I cannot +for a certainty ascertain any thing about his state before his death; +but that which I do know gives me no proof of his having died in the +faith of Christ. As to myself, I am sure of this, that it becomes me +to adore that wonderful grace which plucked me as a brand out of the +burning, and to say in reference to my dear departed father: "Shall +not the judge of all the earth do right?" and in submission to the +will of God to be satisfied with His dealings. This, through grace, I +am able to do. Every true believer who has unconverted parents, for +whose spiritual welfare he is concerned, can understand what joy it +would have been to me to have heard a satisfactory account of a true +change of heart in my dear father before his end; but as it has been +otherwise, I know nevertheless that God will be eternally glorified +even in this dispensation. During no period did I pray more +frequently or more earnestly for the conversion of my dear aged +parent, than during the last year of his life; but, at all events, it +did not please the Lord to let me see the answer to my prayers. + +April 9. Through the 20l. which came in on March 26, and a number of +smaller and larger donations since then, we have had for the last +twelve days more than usual. But now today our means were again +reduced to 7s. 10d., when the Lord sent in 5l. through a brother in +Bristol, who during this year also, as at former times, has been the +instrument in the hands of God of repeatedly supplying our need when +we were very poor. + +We are on the point of sending some money to the East Indies for +Missionary objects. Whilst I was on my knees respecting this object, +5l. was brought for it. + +April 10. Today came in still further for the Orphans, with Eccles. +ix. 10, 5l.; also 2l. + +April 19. For several months past it had appeared to brother Craik +and me, and to several other brethren who help us in the work of +caring for the saints, that a part of the church meeting together at +Gideon Chapel was a hinderance to our giving that clear and distinct +testimony respecting the principles on which we meet, which we desire +to give to the world and to the church at large in this city. As the +Lord, however, had so abundantly blessed our labours in that place, +in the conversion of sinners, and also in the building up of many +saints, we felt that we ought to act in this matter with the greatest +prayerfulness and consideration; and we had therefore many meetings +for prayer and deliberation with several brethren. On this account it +was likewise, that though we came as early as the 17th of January to +the conclusion that it would be better to relinquish Gideon as a +meeting place, we still deferred the matter for two months and a half +longer, before we even mentioned our difficulties publicly. At last, +on March 30th, we assembled with all the saints, and brother Craik +and I stated to them our difficulties. The following is the substance +of what was stated at the meeting. + + + +Brief statement of certain difficulties connected with our continuing +to retain the occupancy of Gideon Chapel, Newfoundland Street, +Bristol. + + + +In order to enter into the force of the following particulars, it is +necessary to keep in mind the position which, as a body of saints, we +seem called upon to maintain, in this city, before the church and the +world. We meet simply as believers in Christ, without reference to +any sectarian distinction, maintaining the Scriptures as our only +rule of doctrine and discipline, and affording freedom for the +exercise of any spiritual gift which the Lord may be pleased to +bestow. We thus hold out a gathering place for all who believe in the +Lord Jesus, and desire to confess His name, by obedience to His +authority. Whatever impedes us, in this our great work, can only be +suffered to continue, if the Lord Himself lays it upon us as a burden +or chastisement. Nothing but necessity can justify our putting any +obstacles in the way of the saints in this city, who, feeling the +obligation of separating from every sectarian bond of union, would +desire to meet with us. + + + +I. + + + +1. There seems no sufficient reason for holding our Lord’s day +morning meetings, for the breaking of bread, in two different places. +See 1 Cor. xi. 20. The number is not too large to assemble in one +place, and the extent of locality is not so great as to prevent it, +except in the ease of invalids or of very aged persons: and the +disadvantages of two meeting places are very serious. In this way of +meeting the gifts are needlessly divided, as the gifted brethren are +in two places instead of one; discipline is rendered very difficult +to be executed, as it can scarcely be ascertained who absent +themselves, etc.; and impediments are thrown in the way of mutual +intercourse and acquaintance, as the saints sometimes go to the one +place, and sometimes to the other. + +2. There are only four ways in which we can so arrange as to assemble +every Lord’s day morning, as a church, together. a, Bethesda may be +given up, and the meeting of the saints maybe at Gideon. b, The +meetings maybe alternately at each place. c, The meetings may be held +at a third place intermediate, in respect of locality, between the +two. d, Gideon may be given up, and Bethesda alone become the place +of meeting for breaking of bread. + +--In regard to the first two of these four arrangements, the size of +Gideon puts a complete obstacle in the way, as there would not be +sufficient room, were the saints and others, who would still attend, +to meet together in that place. The third plan appears to be freest +from all objections, could it be accomplished; but there is no one +other place to be obtained sufficiently large for our purpose, and +therefore, if it be granted that the profit of the saints and the +glory of Christ seem to require our having one gathering place, till +the number of the saints and the extent of locality on which they +reside shall force us to have more than one: the only way in which, +for the present, this can be accomplished is by our relinquishing +Gideon, and having Bethesda as our only place of meeting.6 + + + +II. + + + +But the above are not the only reasons why we should no longer +continue to retain Gideon as a meeting place for the church.--We have +reason to believe that several of our dear brethren, who have been in +the habit of assembling there for worship, do not see with us in +reference to the great leading principles on which we professedly +meet. Ever since the removal of any restraint upon the exercise of +whatever gift the Spirit may bestow, in connexion with the practice +of weekly communion at Gideon, there has been dissatisfaction on the +part of some. A few have left and gone to other places, some have +been in the habit of remaining only as long as there is teaching or +exhortation, and then leaving without breaking bread. We have reason +to believe that several do not, in heart, acknowledge us as taught of +God in regard to the changes, which we have introduced; or, if they +feel unwilling to say so, yet they are inclined to retain their old +way. Now, spiritual rule can only be continued over those who yield +willing subjection: an unwilling submission on the part of those who +are in the place "of the ruled," we deem no true subjection at all. +Therefore, those who do not believe that matters are conducted +amongst us in a Scriptural way, cannot comfortably continue in +fellowship with us: and by yielding up to them the use of the Chapel, +we take away all just cause of complaint.--On account of these +reasons there would be no need of leaving a meeting place under other +circumstances; but as, when brother Craik and I came to Gideon +Chapel, we found saints there assembled together in fellowship who +had contributed towards the purchasing and fitting up of the Chapel, +and who had been in the habit of meeting together on different +principles, it seems not Christlike either to force our light upon +them, or to constrain them to leave us; but to give up the Chapel to +them, as they do not, in heart, go along with us. It cannot be +expected that, for the sake of pleasing even those whom we love in +Christ, we should shrink back from carrying out any truth which the +Lord may lead us into; and, therefore, if our brethren cannot +heartily go along with us, it is better that nothing should be +imposed upon them contrary to their convictions. If it should be said +that for the sake of a few we thus separate from many: our reply is, +that we separate from none of the saints; we only withdraw from a +building, because it appears to us a hinderance to the manifesting of +the truth, and, at the same time hold out a gathering place for all +who feel that it would be for the edification of their souls, and the +glory of God, that they should continue to meet with us. We invite +all those who conscientiously can submit to the order which obtains +amongst us, to continue in fellowship with us; and we purpose to +provide a place of meeting to suit the convenience of the feeble and +aged who would feel the distance of Bethesda to be an obstacle to +their meeting habitually with the saints there. + + + +III. + + + +But in addition to those already mentioned, there is a third class of +difficulties connected with retaining Gideon. The present character +of the meeting for the breaking of bread there, is very far from +fully exhibiting the principles on which we meet together. +Unbelievers sitting among the saints, hinders our appearing to meet +for the breaking of bread, and renders it necessary that a disturbing +pause should intervene between the act of breaking bread and the +other part of the meeting. We cannot have the breaking of bread at +the commencement of the meeting, because of the confusion occasioned +by the intermixture of those who are not in fellowship with us. To +alter this, and to request all who are not in fellowship with us +(except those belonging to the families of the saints) to sit by +themselves, as is the case at Bethesda, would, we fear, produce +increased dissatisfaction. Such a request moreover would not be +Christlike, as long as from the construction of the building no +comfortable sittings were reserved for any besides the saints +themselves. Thus, by retaining Gideon, we are under the necessity of +either marring our testimony to the church at large, or of deepening +the dissatisfaction prevalent among several who are already in +fellowship with us.--Again, the very construction of the place renders +it unsuitable for a meeting of saints. Part of the sittings being +pews, necessarily tends to give the appearance of a distinction +between the very poor and the more respectable class. This +distinction would need to be done away, and we have every reason to +fear that some might feel personally aggrieved by the pews being +taken away and replaced with benches. We have only of late understood +that some of the pews are looked upon as private property. This is +such a violation of the statement that the sittings are all free, +that it could no longer be permitted. To require these unscriptural +practices to be renounced, we have reason to apprehend, would be +considered as an arbitrary act of rule, and might alienate the minds +of those of our dear brethren who are still, in heart, attached to +that to which they hare been accustomed in former years. + +If it can be shown that the above difficulties are capable of being +removed, or that any greater evil would attend the yielding up of +Gideon than the evils which necessarily accompany our retaining it, +then we are bound not to give it up. But, according to our present +light, we see no way of reconciling the two objects, viz.: the +retaining of Gideon, and the exhibiting a full, unhindered testimony +to the truth of God. We repeat it, that we do not separate from any +single individual in fellowship with us, we only leave the walls of a +building, and invite those who feel called upon to separate from +every sectarian system, and to meet where free exercise is afforded +for every spiritual gift, to assemble with us at Bethesda. + +In the case of those who are in ordinary health, the inconvenience +attending the locality of Bethesda is a matter of very little +consequence. Half an hour’s earlier rising on the morning of the +Lord’s day, would be sufficient, in most cases, fully to meet the +difficulty; and the consciousness, that the glory of Jesus and the +true welfare of His church were thereby promoted, would far more than +compensate for the amount of self-denial which the inconvenience +arising from the distance would impose.--In reference to the weak, +the sickly, and the very aged, who reside in the neigbourhood of +Gideon, we trust, in the strength of the Lord, to make such ample +provision for their comfort on the Lord’s day, that they may have no +reason to regret that Gideon has been relinquished. Lastly, as it +regards the opportunities which will be lost, by giving up Gideon, of +proclaiming the truth among believers, as well as preaching the +gospel to the world, we intend, according to our ability and the +measure of gift amongst us, to open places for those purposes in +different parts of the city. + + + +After we had fully stated our minds respecting our difficulties in +continuing to meet, as a church, at Gideon Chapel, we were still +quite willing to continue to occupy it as a preaching place, provided +the brethren whose property the Chapel was (because of their having +contributed towards the purchase and fitting up of the building,) +were perfectly satisfied with our doing so. If this had been the +case, all the difference would have been, that on Lord’s day mornings +Gideon Chapel would have been shut, and all the church would have met +at Bethesda; but we should have been willing not only to preach in +Gideon on the Lord’s day evenings, and once or twice in the week, but +also on the Lord’s day afternoons instead of the morning meeting: so +that even the unconverted, or the believers of that neighbourhood, +who are not in communion with us, should have been no losers.--Whilst +nothing was stated by any one, that showed us we had been mistaken in +the conclusion to which we had come, a point was mentioned which soon +brought the matter to a final decision. It was said that the giving +up of one of the principal meetings on the Lord’s day would be +against the spirit of the trust deeds, as the Chapel was particularly +intended to be a preaching place. Now, though we did not see it to be +thus, as we meant to preach the Word, as before, at Gideon, if it +could be done in perfect harmony with the owners of it; yet it seemed +beyond a question that we could not retain the Chapel, whilst we +appeared, even in the least to alienate the property from the use for +which it was said to have been intended. We, therefore, were +confirmed by this in our conclusion to give up the Chapel at once, +and that entirely. [In order that the aged and infirm, and invalids +who live in the neighbourhood of Gideon, might not be losers by the +change, cars were provided, at the expense of the church, to convey +them to the meeting for the breaking of bread at Bethesda; and a +Chapel was rented in Callow-hill Street, near Gideon, in which, on +the Lord’s day and Thursday evenings the Word was ministered, It was +very kind of the Lord to order it so that this chapel was at once to +be had! Two years and a half afterwards, in October, 1842, we rented +a still more suitable Chapel, in the heart of the City. On April +19th, 1840, we preached for the last time at Gideon, after having +laboured there, with abundant blessing, for about eight years. Only +three saints, as far as I know, out of about 250, who used to meet +with us at Gideon, remained there. Nor has the Lord ceased to bless +our labours since we left.] + +April 27. Monday. The Lord knew that we were penniless, and should be +in need of fresh supplies today for the Orphans, therefore He moved +the hearts of some of His children to remember us, in answer to our +prayer. Yesterday I received with Eccles. ix. 10, 5l., and 10s. from +a sister who had lent this sum to some one, but never expected it +again; and now, having unexpectedly received it, gave it to the Lord +for the Orphans. 1l. 10s. was given for the rent of the +Orphan-Houses. There was 2s. 6d. put anonymously into the box at +Bethesda, and also 1l. This morning I was informed that 5l. had been +sent to the Infant-Orphan-House. Thus the Lord has given for our need +13l. 2s. 6d. + +Let us pause here a few moments, beloved reader! Let us adore the +Lord’s kindness! See how seasonably the Lord sends the help. As our +need is, so He remembers us. It is not now and then that He is +mindful of us, but continually. As surely as we stand in need of any +thing, He sends it; be it money, provisions, clothes, or any thing +else. We may be allowed to be poor, yea, very poor; we may have to +pray again and again to our Father before the answer comes; we may be +reduced so as to have from mal to meal to wait upon Him; yea, +according to all outward appearance, the Lord may seem to have +forgotten us:--but, amidst it all, as surely as we really need any +thing, in His own time and way does He send help. Perhaps you may +say; "But how would you do, in case there were a mealtime to come and +you had no provisions for the children, or they really wanted +clothes, and you had no money to procure them?" Our answer is, such a +thing is impossible as long as the Lord shall give us grace to trust +in Him, (for "whosoever believeth on Him shall not be ashamed,") and +as long as He shall enable us to carry on the work in uprightness of +heart. But should we be ever so left to ourselves as to forsake the +Lord and trust in an arm of flesh, or should we regard iniquity in +our heart i. e. wilfully and habitually do any thing, either in +connexion with the work or otherwise, which is against the will of +God, then we may pray and utter many words before Him, but He will +not hear us, as it is written: "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the +Lord will not hear me." Psalm lxvi. 18. I, therefore, beseech all who +love our Lord Jesus and who may read this, to entreat Him on behalf +of all of us who are engaged in this work, that He would be pleased +to continue to give us faith, and that He would keep us from living +in sin. + +May 2. Nothing having come in for five days, we were today again +penniless. In answer to prayer 5s. 6d. came in, and some trinkets +were sent, the names of which the donor does not wish to be known. +Thus we were helped through this day.--Observe here, how the Lord +allowed five days to pass away without influencing the hearts of any +to send us supplies; but the moment there is real need, the stream +runs again. + +May 3. Today the Lord sent in again some money for the Orphans. He +knew we were penniless, and therefore answered our requests. Besides +1l. 10s. for rent, there came in 1l. 1s. from London, and 2l. from +the Isle of Wight. + +May 4. By what came in yesterday, we were supplied for today; but the +Lord sent today still more, as that which came in yesterday was only +enough for today. There was given in money 7l., of which 3l. was the +profit of the sale of ladies’ baskets, which are made by some sisters +in the Lord for the benefit of the Orphans. + +Last evening a brother was baptized, who on the first Lord’s day of +this year came with his intended wife to Bethesda Chapel. Both were +in an unconverted state. They both were at the same meeting, through +what brother Craik said, made to feel the power of the truth, and, in +consequence, were led to Jesus and found peace in Him, and are now +both in communion with us.--The Lord still condescends to use us as +instruments. Today we conversed with seven persons about fellowship, +and had to send away five, being worn out after we had seen the +seven, one after the other. Only since April 1st, forty-one persons +have come to us to speak about their souls. May the Lord in mercy +give us helpers in the work, for truly the harvest is great; and may +not our ingratitude for His abundant blessing upon our labours oblige +Him to shut up His hands from continuing to use us! + +May 6th. This evening I received 10l. for the Orphans, and 10l. for +the Infant-School, which we are on the point of opening. Before our +little stock is quite exhausted, (for there is yet 2l. left for the +Orphans) the Lord has thus kindly sent a fresh supply. Thus also my +prayer is answered in being able to give to two of the sisters in the +Orphan-Houses some money for their personal expenses. + +May 8. There are four believers staying at my house, and today we had +only a few shillings of our own money left. I gave myself, therefore, +to prayer for means for our own personal expenses. In answer to my +request, I received this morning 5l. + +May 10. Today five of the Orphans were received into fellowship and +baptized. There are now fourteen of them in fellowship. + +May 16. The need of today, as we were again penniless, led us to open +the boxes in the Orphan-Houses, in which 2l. 0s. 2d. was found. There +was given 5s. besides. In the evening came in still further a +sovereign from a sister, a servant, with the following lines: The +Lord has put it into my heart to send a sovereign to the Orphans. He +indeed put it into my heart, which was once at enmity with God and +would have said, lay it by, you may want it when you are old; but +then I could not look towards heaven and say, I know my Heavenly +Father will supply all my need; neither could I say, ‘Abba, Father,’ +for I knew Him not." + +May 17. Today the Lord has sent a little more, so that we have enough +to meet the demands of tomorrow. There came in altogether 3l. 9s. 6d. + +May 22. Several small donations enabled us to supply the necessities +of the last four days. When this day commenced, however, there was +again not a penny in hand. But my eyes were directed to the Lord, and +therefore my heart was at peace; I was fully assured that He would +help this day also. About eleven I was informed that there was 19s. +3d. in hand, being the produce of the boys’ knitting, and that also +some old clothes, given for sale, had been sold for 3s. 6d., and one +Report besides for 3d. To this one of the labourers added 4s. of his +own, and gave a book besides for sale. Thus we had 1l. 7s., which was +enough to meet the demands of this day. + +May 26. By the sale of 166 little books which had been given to be +disposed of, by a few shillings which came in for the children’s +needlework, by 4s. which had been taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, by a little money given by one of the labourers, by +10s. which came anonymously in a letter, and by the sale of some +Reports--we were able to meet the demands since the 22nd. Today there +was 1l. 2s. 8d. left in hand, but this was not quite enough for the +need of the day. In the afternoon came in for needlework 11s. 6d., +and there was 5s. left at the Infant-Orphan House. Thus we had +enough, and a few shillings left for tomorrow. + +May 26. Nothing had come in. My engagements kept me from going to the +Orphan-Houses till seven in the evening, when the labourers met +together for prayer. When we met I found that one of them had given +l7s., which had been divided between the three houses. This, with the +little which had been left yesterday, had procured all necessary +articles. We are now very poor. + +May 27. We met for prayer, at eleven this morning. No money had come +in, but there was enough for dinner in all the houses. This morning +the LAST COALS were used in the Infant-Orphan-House, and in the +Boys’-Orphan-House there were ONLY ENOUGH FOR TODAY, and there was no +money in hand to buy more. In this our need T.P.C. sent a load of +coals. How kind of the Lord! A plain proof that not in displeasure, +but only for the trial of our faith we are allowed to be so poor. We +purpose to meet again at four this afternoon. May the Lord graciously +be pleased to send help in the mean time! + +Evening. The Lord has had mercy! A person bought some days since +several articles, which had been given to be sold for the benefit of +the Orphans, and owed 6l. 15s. This morning I asked the Lord to +incline his heart to bring the money, or a part of it, as we were in +such need. Just as I was going to meet for prayer with my +fellow-labourers this afternoon, he came and brought 4l. But our kind +Father showed us still further today, that only for the trial of our +faith He had for a season withheld supplies; for there was given this +evening with Eccles. ix. 10, 5l. There came in also 9s. for articles +which had been put into the hand of a sister, who has taken on her +the service of disposing of articles which are given for sale. +Besides this, there were sent two boxes of new clothes, and some +materials for clothes, from sisters in the Lord, residing in Dublin, +which articles are worth several pounds. Thus the day, which had +begun with prayer, ended in praise. But there is one thing more to be +recorded respecting this day, as precious or more so than what has +been said: I was today informed that the Lord has begun to stir up +several of the boys to care about their souls. + +May 28. The Lord has kindly sent in further supplies. A clergyman +gave 2l.; and 5s. came in for Reports. + +May 29. Today has come in still further 1l. 3s. 2d., and several +trinkets which were sent from Barnstaple. + +May 30. I took 1l. out of the box in my house. + +May 31. When there was again not a penny in hand, the Lord sent in +2l. 2s. + +June 6. This is Saturday. Several pounds were needed, as usual, for +the Orphans; but there was not a penny in hand. In this our great +need F. W., who often has been instrumental in supplying our need, +and who lives many miles from Bristol, sent 5l. There came in 5s. +besides. Thus we are helped to the close of one more week, in which +our faith has been repeatedly tried. In the evening came in further, +by sale of articles, 2l., and a donation of 10s. + +June 7. Lord’s day. Today came in 7l. 1s. 3d., to enable us to meet +the necessities of tomorrow. + +June 8. This evening eight German Missionary brethren and sisters, +whom I have been for some time expecting, arrived in Bristol, on +their way to the East Indies. + +June 9. Again, when only 2s. 3d. was in hand for the Orphans, there +came in from a considerable distance 2l. + +June 10 and 11. These two days came in 1l. 0s. 4d., which was enough, +with the little which had been left, to procure what was needed. + +June 12. When there was nothing in hand, several articles of +gentlemen’s clothing, all worn, were sent for sale, which, being +disposed of for 1l. 17s., we were helped through this day. + +June 13. Today’s need was met by a box of clothes coming from +Worcester, which contained also 3l. 0s. 2d. There was also 11s. taken +out of the box in my house. + +June 15. 2l. 5s. 3d. came in yesterday and today, by which we were +able to meet the necessary demands, and have 5s. left. + +June 16. Some articles were sold for 11s., which had been given for +sale. This, with the remaining 5s., met the necessities of the day. + +June 17. Only 4s. has come in by children’s needlework. This is all +we have, to meet the need of today, except 2s. 6d., which I found in +the box in my house, which our poverty led me to open. Evening. The +Lord has had mercy upon us. A sister, to whom some time since some +money was left, and whom the Lord has made willing to lay it all out +in His service, having received a small part of what is coming to +her, brought 5l. 10s. 6d. of it, this afternoon, for the Orphans. +There came in still further this evening 2l. + +For several days past I had been very poor in reference to my own +temporal necessities, as well as in reference to the Orphans. Today +we were especially poor, in both respects; but our kind Father +remembered not merely the need of the dear Orphans, but gave me also +some money for my own personal expenses. The same sister just +referred to, who brought 5l. 10s. 6d. for the Orphans, brought me +also 7l. for myself. + +June 18. Today a new coat and waistcoat were given to me, for which I +had repeatedly asked the Lord, as my clothes are now very old. As +surely as I really need any thing, be it in money, or in any other +way, my kind Father supplies the need. + +June 19. The Lord has poured in still more abundantly today. A +brother gave me 10l. for myself. Thus, after a season of more than +usual poverty, the Lord sends a more than usual supply. How kind a +Master do I serve! + +June 21. Again, when there was not one penny in hand, came in today +6l. 10s. for the Orphans. + +June 22. Tomorrow, the Lord willing, I purpose, with my wife, to +accompany the three German brethren and the five German sisters to +Liverpool who purpose to sail from thence. Under these circumstances +it is desirable to leave at least a little money behind. This desire +of my heart the Lord has granted; for this morning D. C. gave me 5l., +and there came in by sale of articles 10s. 5d. In the evening a +sister, who has left Bristol today, sent me by her mother 5l., having +particularly requested her to let me have the money today, as she +knew that I was going away tomorrow. + +This evening we had an especial Missionary prayer meeting, at which +the brethren and sisters were commended to the Lord. + +June 23. This morning we left for Liverpool, where we safely arrived +in the evening. + +The following extracts give the account of the Lord’s goodness in +supplying the necessities of the Orphans, while I was away from +Bristol. + +On June 25, whilst at Liverpool, I received a letter from brother R. +B., master at the Boys’-Orphan-House, dated Bristol, June 24th, in +which he writes thus:--The money which you left behind, with 1s. 6d. +which came in for Reports, supplied the necessities of yesterday and +today; but there is nothing in hand to meet the necessities of +tomorrow. Our hope is in God, assuredly believing that He will, as in +former times, help us in His own time and manner."-- + +Two days afterwards the following letter came. + +"Bristol, June 26, 1840. + +"Dear Brother,--Since I wrote to you we have very sweetly proved the +mercy and truth of our heavenly Father, When my letter left Bristol, +we had not one penny in hand. On the same evening sister gave me a +parcel containing 1l. 1s., the produce of the sale of an article. +This was sufficient for yesterday. But after this we were again +penniless. I went to the meeting in the evening, where brother J. B. +gave me a list of names of persons who had given to him for the +Orphans, to the amount of 1l. 4s. 1d. I afterwards sold one of your +books, one of brother Craik’s Renderings, and a Report. I also +remembered that a few days before 2s. 6d. had been given to me which +I had forgotten to use. We therefore had in all 1l. 11s. 7d., which +is sufficient to meet this day’s necessities. I have just received a +sovereign for the Orphans, and besides this a box, containing various +articles of clothes which has been sent from Wales, part of which +articles are only fit for sale. Thus we have something for tomorrow, +if needed. + +"Your affectionate brother, + +‘‘R. B,’’ + + + +The arrival of the box of clothes, etc., was announced to me in an +affectionate letter from a brother in Wales, who sent them, but whom +I do not know personally. What follows will show how seasonably the +donation came. On June 30th I received another letter from brother +B., dated Bristol, June 29th, 1840, in which he writes "I should have +posted my letter by one o’clock, but delayed until it was too late, +hoping that I might have to speak of the Lord’s goodness as well as +of our poverty. Thank God, my hopes have been realized!-—Besides the +1l. mentioned in my last letter, in the evening of the 26th 11s. 3d. +came in for needlework, and 5s. was given. On Saturday I sold some of +the clothes which had been sent from Wales for 1l., and 5s. was given +to me for an article which had been sold some time ago. As this was +scarcely sufficient, I opened the boxes, and found 3s. 2d. in them. +The whole, therefore, which was in hand, amounted to 3l. 4s. 5d., +which was enough for Saturday the 27th. This morning, Monday, as +nothing had been given to me since Saturday, there were no means to +provide for the dinner in the Boys’-Orphan-House; but one of the +sisters, having a little money of her own, purchased potatoes and +meat with it. At eleven o’clock we met for prayer. The baker came to +the Infant-Orphan-House, but no bread was taken. A brother left two +quarterns of bread at the Boys’-Orphan-House, as a gift. Soon after I +received 1l. through sister L. G., which, as soon as I received, I +began to write to you. It was a comfort to me, in our poverty, that +you still, united in spirit, prayed with us, although distance +separated us in body. I do not know that I ever felt more powerfully +the kindness of our Heavenly Father, than when I received this last +mentioned 1l. Although we are still poor, and soon shall be again in +need, yet, receiving it just at this time, it was very refreshing." + +The next day I received the following report about the Orphan-Houses +from brother B., dated June 30th.--" According to your request, +tomorrow only is the time for me to write, but as the Lord has dealt +very bountifully with us, I write today, in order that you may be +refreshed by the account thereof. Yesterday afternoon, I received +16s., and this morning I sold some more of the articles sent from +Wales, for 8s. 6d., which meets this day’s demands." + +On July 2nd I accompanied the eight German brethren and sisters to +the vessel. Just before they went on board, brother ----, one of the +missionary brethren, gave me 6l. 10s. for the Orphans. He had sold +his plate while at Bristol, considering that as a servant of Jesus +Christ, and as one who desired to preach Jesus to the poor Hindoos, +he needed it not, This money was the produce of it, except about 2l., +which he had spent in purchasing a few books. In giving it to me +said, "The money which we have in the common stock, (being altogether +20l. for the eight) is enough for us. For some months, while we are +on board, we need no money at all, whilst you may lay it out; and +when we need more, the Lord will again supply our need. The other +brethren and sisters have no money of their own, and I desire +likewise to have none, The Lord has laid the Orphans particularly on +my heart, and therefore you must not refuse to accept it."--This +brother little knew how on that very day I had been repeatedly asking +the Lord for means. Truly this was one of the most remarkable ways of +obtaining money, as it came from a poor German missionary, who, in +dependence upon the Lord for his temporal supplies, went to the East +Indies. I sent off at once 5l. of this money to Bristol. The next +day, July 3, I received at Liverpool the following letter from +brother B., dated Bristol, July 2nd.--" Since I last wrote, we have +still found that the Lord is faithful to His word. May we never be +unfaithful towards Him! On Tuesday evening, June 30th, sister C. +brought 11s. 6d. for some articles she sold, and I had received 1s. +6d. for Reports. This, with 8s. that had been put into the boxes, met +the absolute necessities of yesterday, Wednesday. As nothing has been +given since Tuesday, we are, today, Thursday, very needy. I sold the +books I mentioned as being sent, with some others which one of the +sisters in the Orphan-Houses gave of her own, for 7s., which bought +that which was needful for dinner; but there is no money to take in +bread nor milk for one of the houses. We met for prayer. Our hope is +in God, trusting that He who has so often helped us in poverty, will +still do so. If I write any more I shall be too late to post this +letter." + +[On my return to Bristol I found, which is not mentioned in the next +letter, that the milk was purchased with the money of one of the +sisters in the Orphan-Houses.] + +On July 4th I received the following letter from Bristol, dated July +3rd. + +"My dear Brother,--The last account I sent you left us in the greatest +poverty. We had sufficient, it is true, for the time then present; +but there was no money to take in bread with. In the afternoon there +was an old riding habit sent for the Orphans, which I sold this +morning for 7s. I also sold a few books for 5s., two old silver +thimbles and a ring for 1s. 6d.; besides this, 1s. 6d. was sent for +Reports; making in all 15s. This purchased dinner for the three +houses. At twelve o’clock we met for prayer. We were indeed in great +need. There was no money either for bread or milk. The coals in all +the three houses were used, and in every other respect the stores +were in a low state. We had really wanted nothing, but there was +scarcely any thing left. Well, while we were in prayer to God, your +letter came. One of the sisters opened the door and received it, and +after prayer it was given to me. You will be able to conceive the +greatness of our joy, on opening it, and finding it to contain 5l. I +cannot express how much I felt. During the trial I had been much +comforted by the Lord’s sending a little token of his love every day. +It just proved that He was mindful of us in our poverty, and that +when His time was come, He would send us an abundance. I think we all +felt your absence a little, although not cast down on that account. +Money is very precious to those who, like us, so evidently see the +HAND and HEART of our Heavenly Father in bestowing it, The sisters +send their love to you. + +"Your affectionate brother, + +"R. B." + + + +On July 6th I received the following account from Bristol, dated July +5th. "You are, I am sure, often praying for us, and therefore see, in +the help we receive, God’s gracious answers to your prayers, and +therefore you will be refreshed by hearing the account of how matters +are with us. On Saturday there was again a little money needed in the +Girls’-Orphan-House, for butter and such little articles; but I had +none in hand, wherewith to supply this need, until nearly tea time, +when 5s. was given to me. In the evening of the same day, at ten +o’clock, 10s. was sent through brother J. S. You will see that we are +still cast simply on God for the future, without anything to depend +on but Himself; and on whom, or on what should children depend, but +on their most kind Father." + +On July 8th, whilst still detained in the Lord’s service at +Liverpool, I received from a brother 10l. for the Orphans, which I +sent off at once. On the same day, after I had sent off the money, I +received the following letter from Bristol, dated July 7. + +"The Lord is still pleased to keep us very low. Only 4s. 2d. in money +has come in since last I wrote to you. The 10s. I told you of, and +this 4s. 2d., I divided among the sisters. But as this was far from +being sufficient, and knowing that you had received 6l. 10s. and only +sent 5l., I took out of the other funds 1l. 6s. 6d., being all that I +could spare, and divided it also. I would not have done so, had it +not been needful, and had it not appeared to me that we were not +going out of the path of obedience in doing this. There was a sack of +flour sent this morning. We are still, we may say, in need, as even +the money, which I have divided, was not enough to purchase every +thing desirable to have." + +On July 11th, whilst at Worcester, I received the following letter, +dated Bristol, July 9. + +"After writing to you the last time, I got no more money on that day, +except 1s. The next day, Wednesday, I received 2s. 6d., and took 2s. +out of the box in the Boys’-Orphan-House. Also a sister purchased a +Bible, and out of that money I took 3s. 6d. to make up the 30s., to +which I alluded in my last letter. This carried us through the day. +In the evening of the same day I received 11s. 3d. and 2s., which +purchased meat for dinner; and the potatoes in the boys’ garden, +being now fit for use, we had for dinner. After the dinner was +provided we received the 10l. from you, which enabled the sisters +again to replenish their stock. Out of the 10l. I kept the 30s., in +case I might need it on Saturday for the salaries of the masters and +governesses of the Day Schools. We felt the poverty a little more, I +think, on account of your absence. I knew the Lord would help, but +still I felt tried in some measure. The Lord, by His grace, reproves +our waywardness towards Him. + +When this letter arrived, there was sent to me, at the same time, +from Bristol, 5l. for the Orphans, which I sent off at once. On July +17th I returned to Bristol. + +I add a few more words respecting my stay at Liverpool. + +--About October 1837 I sent some Bibles and 46 copies of my Narrative +to a brother in Upper Canada, who, in dependence upon the Lord for +temporal supplies, is labouring as a missionary in that country. +About eighteen months afterwards I heard, that this box had not +arrived. I then wrote to the shipbroker at Liverpool, (who as agent +had to send it to America, and to whom I had paid his commission and +the freight), to make inquiry about the box; but I received no +answer. About a month afterwards my letter was returned to me, +through the Dead-Letter Office, and it was stated on the outside that +the individual had left Liverpool, and no one knew where he was gone. +Putting all these things together, I had now full reason to think +that the broker had, never sent off the box. My comfort, however, +was, that though this poor sinner had acted thus, yet the Lord, in +His own place and way, would use the Bibles and my Narratives. Now, +almost immediately after my arrival in Liverpool, a brother told me, +that several persons wished to hear me preach who had read my +Narrative; and that he knew a considerable number had been bought by +a brother, a bookseller, from pawnbrokers, and sold again; and that +some also had been ordered from London when there were no more to be +had otherwise. It was thus evident that the shipbroker pawned these +Narratives before he absconded; but the Lord used them as I had +hoped.--I preached ten times in English and once in German whilst at +Liverpool, and I know that several persons were brought to hear me, +through having read my Narrative.--The German brethren preached twice +in German, there being several German vessels in the port, and a +number of German sugar refiners living at Liverpool. Liverpool seems +to me especially a place where a brother, who is familiar with French +and German, may find an abundance of work among the German and French +sailors, in the way of preaching to them, and in the way of +distributing French and German Bibles and Tracts.--One of the German +missionary brethren found out a brother in the Lord, a native of the +same town in Prussia, from whence he himself comes, who repeatedly +met with us. This dear sailor was the only believer in the vessel in +which he was, and has had to suffer much for the Lord’s sake.--When +the German brethren and sisters were going on board, I engaged a fly +for the purpose of taking all their small luggage. When the man put +the luggage into the fly, I was struck by its having a hind boot, +which I had never seen before in any fly, which he opened, and into +which he put several carpet bags. There were seventeen packages +altogether. When we arrived at the vessel it was just on the point of +going into the river, with several other vessels, and there were +crowds of people standing at the docks. The flyman took out the +luggage and was on the point of leaving, when I asked him whether he +had taken out all the luggage, which I had not been able to count, +because of the pressure of people, and the rapidity with which the +packages were taken to the vessel. His reply was, Yes. But all at +once, by the good hand of God, I remembered the hind boot, and I +asked him to open it. The man, somewhat confused, opened it, and in +it were five or six carpet bags. This thing showed me afresh our +entire dependence upon the Lord, step by step. I was alone. The crowd +was great. The vessel was on the point of sailing: and all without my +fault or the fault of any one; but it was so through unforseen +circumstances. One minute later, and the bags, in all human +probability, would have been lost. For when the brethren had missed +their luggage, it would have been too late; for though I had marked +the number of the fly when I engaged it, yet that would have profited +nothing, when once the brethren were at sea. But the hand of God was +for good upon these His children, whose stock of linen was only such +as they would need. Such a circumstance should teach one to make the +very smallest affairs a subject of prayer; for instance, That all the +luggage might be safely taken out of a fly. + +On July 10th my wife and I left Liverpool, where we had experienced +much kindness, for Worcester, where we stayed a few days, and had +again much love shown to us by the saints there. + +July 25. Since July 11th the Lord has kindly sent in the supplies for +the Orphans, so that we have had always something coming in, before +the last which was in hand was spent. Now, today, having paid out +this morning 8l. 5s., again nothing was left in hand, when in the +afternoon 3l. came in by sale of articles. + +July 26. Lord’s-day. As I had no opportunity today of preaching in +our chapels (there being two brethren ministering among us who are +strangers in Bristol), I have preached twice this evening in the open +air. Precious as this work is, yet I am sure it is not that to which +I am called for a constancy, as I have no strength of body for it. +But I have seen afresh this evening how greatly it is needed. The +second time I preached, I took my stand in a court, filled with poor +people, almost every one of whom was dirty, though it was the Lord’s +day evening. A woman readily lent me a chair on which I stood, and +could thus be heard by the people in the houses behind and before me, +and on my right and left hand. Judging from their dirty appearance, I +should not suppose any of these poor people had been any where, to +hear the Gospel preached throughout the day. How plenteous is the +harvest, and how few are the labourers! Lord of the harvest, send +Thou, in compassion to poor sinners, more labourers into the harvest! +--How well a brother who has some gift, and a measure of strength of +lungs, might employ a part of the Lord’s days, or of other days, +either by reading the Scriptures from house to house to such persons, +and making some remarks on them; or by standing up in a court and +reading the Scriptures aloud and speaking on them. It is very rarely +that one meets with decided opposition on these occasions; at least I +have generally in such cases found far more readiness to listen, than +decidedly to oppose. + +Aug. 1. A few days since a brother was staying with me, on his way to +his father, whom he had not seen for above two years, and who was +greatly opposed to him, on account of the decided steps which his son +had taken for the Lord. Before this brother left, that precious +promise of our Lord was brought to my mind: "If two of you shall +agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be +done for them of my Father which is in heaven." Matt. xviii. 19. +Accordingly, I went to the brother’s room, and having agreed to pray +about a kind reception from his father, and the conversion of both +parents, we prayed together.--Today this brother returned. The Lord +has answered already one part of the prayer. The brother was most +kindly received, contrary to all natural expectation. May the Lord +now help us both to look for an answer to the other part of our +prayer! There is nothing too hard for the Lord! + +Since the publication of the third edition, the father of this +brother died. He lived above ten years after Aug. 1, 1840, until he +was above 86 years of age; and as he continued a life of much sin and +opposition to the truth, the prospect with reference to his +conversion became darker and darker. But at last the Lord answered +prayer. This aged sinner was entirely changed, simply rested on the +Lord Jesus for the salvation of his soul, and became as much attached +to his believing son, as before he had been opposed to him; and +wished to have him about him as much as possible, that he might read +the Holy Scriptures to him and pray with him. Let this instance +encourage believers, who have unbelieving parents, to continue in +prayer for them. + +Since the publication of the fourth edition, the mother also died. +About sixteen years had elapsed, after her son and I had thus prayed +together, before, in her case, the answer was granted; yet she, too, +at last, in very advanced years, was brought to trust in the Lord +Jesus alone for the salvation of her soul.--I distinctly remember, +with what full assurance, that the Lord would answer our united +supplication, I went to the room of this brother, to propose prayer, +resting upon the promise in Matt. xviii. 19, though the case appeared +to be most hopeless. + +Aug. 6. Yesterday I was led, by the sense of our necessity, and the +knowledge of the Father’s heart, like Elijah, to go again and again +to Him with my request for help, as there was nothing in hand for the +Orphans to supply the necessities of today. Last evening, after the +meeting, a brother from Oxford gave me a sovereign for the Orphans; +by two other individuals was sent half-a-crown; and by the sale of an +article, which had been given many weeks since, but was only disposed +of today, came in 5s.: thus, in all, the Lord sent again 1l. 7s. 6d. +This morning I heard that 10s. was given yesterday to brother B., so +that we were able to meet the demands of today, which are 1l. 15s. + +Aug. 7. As there was only 2s. 6d. in hand, I asked the Lord +repeatedly yesterday to send us what was needed for today. When I +came home last evening from the meeting, 5l. was given to me, which +Q. Q. had brought while I was away, to be used as I thought well. +This I took for the Orphans, which will supply our need for today and +tomorrow. + +Aug. 8. Saturday. This evening I was meditating on the 4th Psalm. The +words in verse 3: "But know that the Lord hath set apart him that is +godly for Himself; the Lord will hear when I call upon Him," I was +enabled to apply to myself, and they led me to prayer for spiritual +blessings. Whilst in prayer, the need of the Orphans (there being now +again not one penny in hand), was also brought to my mind, and I +asked the Lord respecting this likewise. ABOUT FIVE MINUTES +AFTERWARDS I was informed that a sister wished to see me. She brought +1l. 10s. for the Orphans. Thus the Lord has already kindly sent a +little to begin the week with. There was also still further given +today, 1s. 11d.; and 5s. 1d. was taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses. + +Aug. 10. Monday. The 1l. 17s. which came in on Saturday evening for +the Orphans, was not enough for the necessities of today, as 2l. l5s. +was required. About noon, the Lord gave through a brother in Bath, +who has a relative in one of the Orphan-Houses, 1l. 10s. more, so +that we had enough, and a few shillings left. This evening came in +4s. besides, also 15s. 6d. by sale of articles. + +Aug. 11. The money which was in hand, with 3s. which was given by one +of the labourers, as there was not enough otherwise, helped us +through this day. + +Aug. 12. One of the labourers gave today 10s. of his own, as nothing +had come in. Yet this would not have been sufficient, had there not +been sold two pairs of stockings, which had been knitted by the boys, +for 4s. 1d., and had not 5s. been found in one of the boxes. + +Aug. 13. Yesterday there was given a collection of shells, which was +sold today, and supplied the necessities of this day, with an +addition of 10s. which a brother gave last evening, and 4s. which was +taken out of the box in the Infant-Orphan-House. + +Aug. 14. There was nothing at all in hand. I opened the box in my +house, and found 1s. 4d. in it, A labourer gave 4s. of his own. There +was found 1s, 6d. in the boxes in the Orphan-Houses, and 5s. came in +by the sale of a few articles which had been given for that purpose. +By this 11s. 10d, we were able to meet the absolute need, but were +able to take in only a small quantity of bread. + +Aug. 15. There was today the greatest poverty in all the three +houses; all the stores were very low, as the income throughout the +week had been so small. In addition to this it was Saturday, when the +wants are nearly double in comparison with other days. At least 3l. +was needed to help us comfortably through the day; but there was +nothing towards this in hand. My only hope was in God. + +The very necessity led me to expect help for this day; for if none +had come, the Lord’s name would have been dishonoured. Between twelve +and one two sisters in the Lord called on me, and the one gave me 2l. +and the other 7s. 6d. for the Orphans. With this I went to the +Boys’-Orphan-House about one o’clock, where I found the children at +dinner. Brother B. put the following note into my hand, which he was +just going to send off: + +"Dear Brother,--With potatoes from the children’s garden, and with +apples from the tree in the play-ground (which apples were used for +apple dumplings), and 4s. 6d. the price of some articles given by one +of the labourers, we have a dinner. There is much needed. But the +Lord has provided and will provide." + +There came in still further this day by sale of Reports, 1s., by the +box in the Girls’-Orphan-House, 1s., by children’s needlework, 6s. +6d., by a donation of one of the sisters in the Orphan-Houses, 6s. +Thus we had this day 3l. 6s. 6d. to meet all necessities, and are +brought to the close of another week. + +Aug. 16. Lord’s-day. There came in still further last evening, 3s. by +sale of some articles, and today 2s. was given, and 5l.; so that the +Lord in His love and faithfulness has given us what we are likely to +need tomorrow and the day after. + +Aug. 17. There has come in still further 2l. + +Aug. 18. This morning a brother who passed through Bristol gave 1l., +saying that it had been especially laid on his heart to do so. Thus +the Lord has provided a little towards tomorrow. Besides this came in +today 1s. 9d. + +Aug. 19. By the sale of three pairs of stockings came in 5s. 6d., and +from Liverpool was sent 12s. 6d.: this, with what was in hand, was +enough for today, and left a little over. + +Aug. 20. Today there was not enough money in hand to meet all the +demands; but it being known that yesterday several persons had put +money into the boxes in the Orphan-Houses, they were opened, and +found to contain 1l. 4s. 6d., which was more than sufficient. + +I would call upon the believing reader to admire the love and wisdom +and power of God in ordering it so that persons should come to the +Orphan-Houses just at the time when there is temporal pressure, and +should be influenced to put money into the boxes. These little sums +have been often the means of helping us in our greatest need. The +especial providence of God, as in every other respect, so in this +particular point also, is to be seen respecting this Institution, in +that so much is anonymously put into the boxes; for there has been no +less than 45l. 18s. 9 3/4d, put in during the last two years, from +Dec. 10, 1838, to Dec. 10, 1840. + +Aug. 22. Saturday. Yesterday there was only 13s. 6d. in hand, which +was enough to meet the necessities of the day, but not sufficient to +enable us to take in the usual quantity of bread. This morning we +were in much need, not only because there were no means for procuring +dinner in the Boys’ and Girls’-Orphan-Houses, but also because, this +being Saturday, we had to procure provisions for two days. When +brother B. went to the Infant-Orphan-House, to make inquiry about the +demands for today, he was informed that money had been put into the +box there, which was found to be 12s. There came in also in the +morning 10s, besides. This 1l. 2s. was more than sufficient to +purchase all that was needed for dinner. Between twelve and one +o’clock there arrived a parcel from Clapham, which contained several +donations for the Orphans, amounting to 2l. l5s., besides a pair of +sheets and pillow cases, 4 frocks, 4 handkerchiefs, 4 caps, 1 stuff +petticoat, 2 chemises, 6 bags, 1 little shirt, (all new), and several +yards of prints and calico. In the evening came a box from Worcester, +which contained the following articles for sale: a valuable veil, 2 +silver ladles, a silver fork, 2 pairs of new plated candlesticks, a +fan, and 2 Italian books. There came also from the neighbourhood of +Wolverhampton, 2s. 6d. and seven books. Thus the Lord helped us +through this day also, at the commencement of which we were so very +poor, and needed several pounds. + +Aug. 23. Lord’s-day. As we have often found it to be the case, so it +is again now. After the Lord has tried our faith, He, in the love of +His heart, gives us an abundance, to show that not in anger, but for +the glory of His name, and for the trial of our faith He has allowed +us to be poor. This morning I received from an aged and afflicted +servant, 3l.; and a little afterwards 8l. from Q. Q. From another +servant 5s.; also 2s. was put anonymously into the box at Bethesda, +besides the 1l. 10s. for rent. Thus the Lord has kindly given today +12l. 17s. + +Aug. 29. Saturday. Since last Monday had come in only 2l. by the +profits of the sale of ladies’ baskets, 1l. l4s. 10d. by sale of +articles, 3s. as two donations, and 6d. by Reports. Thus it happened +that when this day began, though a Saturday, we had only 7s. in hand. +In the course of the morning came in 11s. 9d., and towards the +evening 8s. 6d. This day we have been as poor in regard to our +stores, as at any time. During the whole of this day, though +Saturday, we had only 1l. 7s. 3d, On this account we had to buy a +smaller quantity of bread than usual, etc.; nevertheless the children +have even this day lacked nothing, and there is a sufficient quantity +of wholesome food till breakfast on Monday morning. + +For many weeks past very little has come in for the other funds. The +chief supply has been by the sale of Bibles. Last Saturday I was not +able to pay the whole of the weekly salaries of the teachers in the +Day Schools, which, however, does not make me a debtor to them, as it +is an understood thing, that they have not to look to me for payment, +but to the Lord. Today again only 2s. was in hand, whilst several +pounds were needed to pay the salaries. It appeared now plainly to be +the will of the Lord that, as all the labourers in the Orphan-Houses +know about the state of the funds, so the brethren and sisters who +labour in the Day Schools should share the trial of faith and the joy +of faith with us. Accordingly we all met, and after I had laid on +their hearts, the importance of keeping to themselves, for the Lord’s +sake, the state of the funds, we prayed together. + +Aug. 30. Lord’s day. Today the Lord has again bountifully opened His +hand for the Orphans. There came in with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, 5l.; +from a sister, a servant, 10s.; and for rent 1l. 10s. Besides this, +was anonymously put into the box at Bethesda, 10s. 3d. and 2s. 6d. + +Sept. 1. Though there was a good supply given to the matrons +yesterday, yet, as the stock of provisions had been so low on +Saturday, the money was all spent by last evening; and had the Lord +not kindly sent in yesterday 14s., and today 1l. 10s., we should have +been again in need. + +Sept. 4. The day before yesterday, Sept. 2, came a box from Leeds, +from sisters in the Lord whom we have never seen, and of whom until +now we have never heard, but on whose hearts the Lord has laid His +work in our hands. The box contained a variety of articles, to be +sold for the benefit of the Orphans. No money has come in the last +two days, except 1s. which was given, and 5s. for things sold. On +this account the boxes in the Orphan-Houses were opened, but only 1s. +7 1/2d. was found in them. To supply what was needed today, an +article which came in the box from Leeds was sold for 5s. and thus we +were helped through the day. The sisters who sent the box from Leeds +wrote to us a most affectionate letter, in which they announced this +and another box which is to follow, stating how much the Lord had +laid the work in our hand on their hearts. They may have little +thought, when they sent off the box, that so soon the produce of one +of the articles sent by them would supply our need. + +Sept. 5. Saturday. Because there had come in so little during the +last days, at least 3l. was requisite to supply the need of today. +There was, however, not one penny in hand when the day commenced. +Last evening the labourers in the Orphan-Houses, together with the +teachers of the Day Schools, met for prayer. This morning one of the +teachers, who had a little money of his own, brought 1l. 5s. 6d. +Thus, as we had hoped, we were enabled to provide for the dinner. In +the afternoon all of us met again for prayer. Another teacher of the +Day Schools gave 2s, 6d, and 1s. came in besides. But all this was +not enough. There was no dinner provided for tomorrow, nor was there +any money to take in milk tomorrow, and besides this a number of +other little things were to be purchased, that there might be no real +want of anything. Now observe how our kind father helped us! Between +seven and eight this evening a sister, whose heart the Lord has made +willing to take on her the service of disposing of the articles which +are sent for sale, brought 2l. 10s. 6d. for some of the things which +came a fortnight ago from Worcester, and last Wednesday from Leeds. +The sister stated, that though she did not feel at all well, she had +come because she had it so laid on her heart, that she could not stay +away. Our Father knew our need, and therefore, though so late, He +sent this help. Thus we were richly provided with all we needed this +Saturday. + +Sept. 6. The Lord has kindly sent in today for the Orphans 4l. 5s. +6d. for the need of tomorrow. One pound of this money was given by a +servant, who has again and again given of late, and who has thus +again and again been the means of supplying our need, when there was +either nothing at all, or not sufficient in hand. When she gave me +the money to-night, she told me that of late she had had the Orphans +particularly laid on her heart. 1l. 3s. was the produce of an +orphan-box, which a sister was led so seasonably to send just now. + +Sept. 7. This morning a brother from Barnstaple, who came on Saturday +evening (that evening when we were so greatly tried, but so +graciously delivered), gave me 1l. 0s. 3d., which the love of some +saints at Barnstaple had sent for the Orphans, besides 5s. of his +own. We have thus enough for today and tomorrow. There came in still +further today, 6s. 6d. + +Sept. 8. How kindly has the Lord so ordered it that for some time +past the income for the school-fund should have been so little, in +order that thus we might be constrained to let the labourers in the +Day Schools share our joys and our trials of faith, which had been +before kept from them! But as above two years ago the Lord ordered it +so that it became needful to communicate to the labourers in the +Orphan-Houses the state of the funds, and made it a blessing to them, +so that I am now able to leave Bristol, and yet the work goes on, so, +I doubt not, the brethren and sisters who are teachers in the Day +Schools will be greatly blessed by being thus partakers of our +precious secret respecting the state of the funds. Our prayer +meetings have already been a blessing to us, and united us more than +ever in the work. We have them now every morning at seven, and we +shall continue them, the Lord helping us, till we see His hand +stretched forth, not merely in giving us means for the teachers, but +also for other purposes; for we need a stove in one of the school +rooms, a fresh supply of several kinds of Bibles and New Testaments, +and it is desirable to have means to help Missionary brethren who +labour in dependence upon the Lord for the supply of their temporal +necessities. + +Sept. 9. We are now meeting every morning at seven for prayer. With +5s. which was sent yesterday from the Isle of Wight for the Orphans, +we have commenced the day; but I believe that the Lord will help us +through this day also. + +Evening. About twelve this morning a brother, a stranger, who is +staying at Ashton, near Bristol, came with some of his family to the +Orphan-Houses. While brother B. was for a few moments out of the room +to fetch a key, the visiting brother took the opportunity of secretly +putting something into the box at the Boys’-Orphan-House. Brother B., +however, perceived it before he could get away from the box, and, the +brother being gone, our great need brought it out, when it was found +to be 5l. Thus the Lord kindly has provided for the need of today and +tomorrow. When this money was given we were exceedingly poor. For not +only would there have been no means to take in the usual quantity of +bread in one of the houses, but there was no money to take in milk in +the afternoon in any of the houses. The Lord knew our need, and +therefore just now sent this brother. He gave also 2s, for Reports. + +Sept. 10. When now the 5l. of yesterday was again spent, the Lord has +kindly sent another 5l. There came in still further 6s. 10d. + +Yesterday came in it. 7s., and today 1l. 15s. 10d. for the other +funds. Thus the Lord, in answer to our petitions at the morning +prayer meetings, has sent in a little for these funds also. + +Sept. 11. The Lord has sent in still further and more richly for the +Orphans. This morning 1l. was given to me which had been sent from +Trowbridge, and this afternoon a brother who came from Scotland gave +me 10l., and brought the following trinkets which were sent by a lady +from Scotland:--2 clasps, a ring, 2 pairs of ear-rings, a slide, a +pin, a cross, and 2 bracelets, all of gold. In the afternoon came in +3l. by sale of articles. + +Sept. 12. The Lord has sent in still more. This morning was sent 10l. +through a banker in London, by the order of a sister at Worcester; +and 10s. was put into the box at my house. This has been a week of +peculiar mercies, as above 40l. has been sent in, besides several +articles. We have continued to meet for prayer every morning, from +seven to eight. + +Sept. 13. Today came in 3l. 8s. 4d.,of which 1l. 10s. 6d. was for some +of the articles sent from Leeds. + +Sept. 16. Though during the last week above 40l. came in, yet, +because the usual expenses for housekeeping were about 15l., and +because most of the sisters who labour in the Orphan-Houses had not +had for a long time any money for their own personal necessities, we +were the day before yesterday again so poor, that only a few +shillings were left. The Lord, knowing this, sent in a little money, +and, by a sister from the Isle of Wight, 7 rings, 2 brooches, 2 pins, +1 pair of ear-rings, 2 pairs of studs, all of gold, 2 chemises, and 2 +babies’ shirts. Today arrived from Leeds, from two sisters in the +Lord before referred to, a second box, the first having come about a +fortnight ago. This second box contained the following articles:--2 +silver dessert spoons, a pair of silver sugar tongs, a silver tea +caddy spoon, 6 plated forks, 4 knife resters, a cream spoon, 6 +Britannia metal tea spoons, a silver watch, a metal watch, a small +telescope, 2 cloak fastenings, 11 pencils, a pen case with pieces of +sealing wax, 2 pairs of scissors, 6 chimney ornaments, a boa ring, a +chess board, 3 purses with 2l. 1s. 4d., 2 silver pocket knives, a +silver pencil case, a ditto of brass, a bodkin case, a gold pin, a +silver vinaigrette, 125 needles, 1 memorandum case, 5 paper baskets, +18 books, 100 copies of a small English Grammar (unbound), 75 +pamphlets, 37 table mats, 120 little tracts, 5 pairs of stockings, 2 +pairs of socks, a Thibet shawl, 6 coloured frocks, 4 caps, 9 collars, +8 neckerchiefs, 3 muslin aprons, 5 holland aprons, 4 muslin frocks, 6 +babies’ ditto, 2 white gowns, 2 remnants of print, 5 habit shirts, a +bonnet, a merino apron, a glass trumpet, a taper candlestick, several +small pieces of riband and gauze, 4 yards of silk fringe, 7 cases of +different kinds of cards, a crape scarf, some lining calico, 13 +little boxes, a straw basket, and about 50 other various little +articles. It is difficult to describe the peculiar pleasure which I +had in unpacking the box, and in finding that all these articles were +for the Lord’s work.--There came in still further this evening 8s. + +Besides other small donations since the 10th, there came into day 5l. +for the other funds, as the answer to oft-repeated prayer; also, from +Liverpool, 1l. l4s. 8d. Thus the Lord encourages our hearts in this +part of the work likewise. + +Sept. 17. The need of today for the Orphans was supplied by the +little which had come in yesterday, and by the 2l. 1s. 4d. which came +in the second box from Leeds. These two boxes from Leeds have been +sent most seasonably by the Lord, and thus truly the sisters who sent +them have been led by Him to do so, according to what they wrote in a +letter, which announced the arrival of the first box; "We feel deeply +interested in your concerns, and our anxiety to serve you has +increased by every new discovery of the kindness and goodness of God, +in providing for your wants. Indeed, we cannot but believe that the +Lord has put it into our hearts to help you, and we trust you will +honour us, His unworthy servants, by believing that our gift is +really His." There came in today 2l. 16s. by the sale of some of the +articles sent in the first box from Leeds, and by the sale of some +other articles. Thus our need for tomorrow is supplied. + +Sept. 18. Today the Lord has sent again 17s. 5d. by sale of some of +the articles sent from Leeds, and 2l. 10s. from Leicestershire, and +also 4s. for children’s needlework. Thus we had enough for tomorrow, +being Saturday. + +Sept. 21. Monday. By what was in hand for the Orphans, and by what +had come in yesterday, the need of today is more than supplied, as +there is enough for tomorrow also. + +Today a brother from the neighbourhood of London gave me 10l., to be +laid out as it might be most needed. we have been praying many days +for the School-Bible—and Missionary Funds, I took it all for them. +This brother knew nothing about our work, when he came three days +since to Bristol. Thus the Lord, to show His continued care over us, +raises up new helpers. They that trust in the Lord shall never be +confounded! Some who helped for a while may fall asleep in Jesus; +others may grow cold in the service of the Lord; others may be as +desirous as ever to help, but have no longer the means; others may +have both a willing heart to help, and have also the means, but may +see it the Lord’s will to lay them out in another way;--and thus, from +one cause or another, were we to lean upon man, we should surely be +confounded; but, in leaning upon the living God alone, We are BEYOND +disappointment, and BEYOND being forsaken because of death, or want +of means, or want of love, or because of the claims of other work. +How precious to have learned in any measure to stand with God alone +in the world, and yet to be happy, and to know that surely no good +thing shall be withheld from us whilst we walk uprightly! + +Sept. 23. This morning there was again only 10s. in hand for the +Orphans. As this was not enough for the day, I opened the box in my +house, in which I found 8s. 6d. The boxes in the Orphan-Houses were +also opened, which contained 7s. 6 1/2d. There came in also by the +sale of a pair of stockings, 1s. 6d. This 1l., 7s. 6 1/2d. was +enough, and even 3s. more than was absolutely needed. The Lord gave +today another proof that He is still mindful of us, for a brother +sent half a ton of coals to each of the three houses. + +Sept. 24. Yesterday our prayer, in our meeting at twelve o’clock, was +especially for the supply of today. I was fully assured that the Lord +would send help, as now all our stores were again exhausted. +Accordingly, last evening a sister, into whose hands some of the +articles, which came in the second box from Leeds, had been put for +sale, gave me 1l. 3s. 7d., being the payment for some of them. There +came in a donation of 2s. besides. This 1l. 5s. 7d. served for this +day. The Lord be praised who has helped us thus! + +Sept. 25. It is now half-past eleven. Nothing has come in as yet. How +the Lord will help us through the day is not my care; for sure I am +He will help. I am just going to meet with my fellow-labourers for +prayer. Perhaps the Lord will again, at the time of the meeting, fill +our mouths with praise, as He has done so many times. My soul waits +on Him for deliverance! How truly precious to have such a Father as +we have! + +Sept. 26. When I went yesterday to the meeting for prayer, I found +that some articles, which had come from Leeds, had been sold for 10s. +9d., and that 2s. 6d. had been taken out of the box in the +Girls’-Orphan-Ho use. To this one of the labourers added 10s. of his +own. This 1l. 3s. 3d. supplied all we needed yesterday; but there was +now again nothing in hand to meet this day’s demands, which I knew +would be great, on account of its being Saturday. The Lord, however, +remembered our Saturday’s necessities, and therefore sent in +abundantly, so that we had even more than we needed for today, though +we required no less than 5l. The way in which He kindly helped us, +was this: first, 3l. came in for articles which had been sent from +Leeds; afterwards a little boy and girl brought two little Savings’ +Banks, filled with their little presents, amounting altogether to +15s l 1/4d. In the evening came in still further 4l. for articles +which had been sold, most of which had likewise been sent from Leeds. +Thus the Lord sent in altogether 8l. l8s. l 1/4d. in the course of +the day, whilst it commenced without there being a penny in hand. + +Sept. 27. Today the Lord has sent in still further 2l. 5s. 8d., of +which 15s. 8d. was for articles sent from Leeds, and 1l. with +Ecclesiastes ix. 10. + +Sept. 29. Yesterday we were again penniless, after the necessities of +the three houses had been supplied. Almost immediately afterwards +came in 1l. l2s. 2d., sufficient to supply the need of today. + +Sept. 30. Today there is nothing in hand. It is now a quarter past +eleven, but nothing yet has come in. Nevertheless the Lord will +surely help us this day also! About five minutes after I had written +the above, I was informed by a note from brother B., that 2l. 10s. +6d. had come in in small donations. + +Oct. 1. It is now again eleven o’clock, and the Lord has not as yet +been pleased to send in any thing for the necessities of this day. +Let me see now how the Lord will again help us in the love of His +heart; for He will surely help, though I know not how.--Evening. When +I went to the prayer meeting, I found that only 1s. had come in, but +at the same time I was informed that the money, which had been +divided yesterday among the matrons, was enough for today also. + +Oct. 2. Nothing came in yesterday, nor this morning. In addition to +this, I was so engaged, that in the afternoon I had not even time to +make inquiry how the Lord had helped. Thus it is often that I can do +nothing but quietly go on with my engagements, casting all care upon +the Lord. When I came home this evening, the first thing that met my +eyes was the following letter from a distance of many miles: + +"Beloved Brother,--Five pounds are enclosed as from the Lord, as I +believe you stand in need of it for the use of the Orphans. Yours +affectionately, F. W. + +Truly, the Lord, to whom we had spoken yesterday, had spoken for us, +and told this brother that we were in need of money. After having +read this letter, my eyes met two others. In the one I was informed +by a brother, that he had sold two pairs of fire screens for 8s., and +had sent the money. These screens had been for many months in his +hands for sale, and now to-day, in this our poverty, a lady came to +the shop and bought them. The other letter was from brother B., +master of the boys in the Boys’-Orphan-House, which I give here: + +"I opened the boxes and found 4s. 1 1/2d. in them. This was far from +being sufficient. About four o’clock three persons came to the +Orphan-Houses, and put into the box at the Boys’-Orphan-House 7s., +into the box at the Infant-Orphan-House 6s., and into the box at the +Girls’-Orphan-House 7s. Thus I have had in all to divide 1l. 4s. 1 +1/2d., which meets the necessities of the day." + +Oct. 3. It was exceedingly kind of the Lord to send in so much +yesterday; for the necessities of today, being Saturday, required it +all. And now, when there was again nothing in hand, there arrived +this evening a large box, sent by a sister at Stafford, whom I never +saw, which contained 1l. 5s., and the following articles: 11 gold +rings, a silver ring washed, a locket, a gold brooch, 3 single +ear-rings, a watch hook, a silver watch-guard, 2 silver-mounted eye +glasses, 3 vinaigrettes, 2 purses, a silver buckle, 2 old silver +coins, 2 silver pencil cases, 3 pairs of bracelets, 3 necklaces, 2 +waist buckles, a bracelet snap, a cloak fastening, a necklace snap, a +yard measure, a mourning brooch, 7 pincushions, a snuff box, a small +looking glass, 2 china boxes, a china inkstand, 5 china cups and +saucers, a china basket, 2 china jugs, a scent bottle, a boa ring, 20 +shells, a boy’s cap, a pair of snuffers and stand, a little basket, a +pair of screen handles, 3 ornamental pens, 5 artificial flowers, 5 +glass plates, 5 counter plates, 3 pairs of card racks, a comb, a pair +of watch pockets, 12 table mats, 8 paintings, 4 drawings, 2 fans, a +pair of garters, 3 pairs of gloves, 3 pairs of silk stockings, 3 +veils, a gauze scarf, 6 ladies’ bags, 5 silk bands, 2 floss silk +scarfs, a gauze handkerchief, 2 silk scarfs, a crape shawl, a silk +shawl, 2 muslin capes, 30 yards of worn cotton lace, 8 yards of +muslin work, 9 yards of print, a pinafore, a frock, a sampler, a pair +of socks, a pair of ear-rings, and 17 ladies’ dresses.--One thing is +particularly to be noticed respecting this donation, that the Lord +from time to time raises up fresh individuals to help us in the work, +thereby continually reminding us, that He is not limited to any +individuals in particular, neither are we, His children. + +Oct. 4. Today came in 19s. 4d., by sale of some of the articles sent +from Leeds. Thus our need for tomorrow is supplied. + +Oct. 5. 7l. 15s. 2d. came in again today, of which 5l. was from a +brother whom I have never seen. + +Oct. 6. Today came in further by sale of articles which had been sent +from Leeds, 3l. 7s. 6d., also 14s. 3d. in small donations. + +Oct. 7. 1l. 14s. 2d. came in today in small donations. + +It is now five weeks, since we have daily met for prayer. Not indeed +merely to ask for means, but for grace and wisdom for ourselves in +reference to the work, for the conversion of the children under our +care, for grace for those children who stand already on the Lord’s +side, for a blessing upon the circulation of the Scriptures, for a +blessing upon the work, with reference to the church at large, etc. +But whilst we thus, as the Spirit led us, prayed for various things, +nevertheless the lack of means was that which had brought us day +after day together. We asked the Lord to give us the means which are +needed for carrying on the Day Schools, for buying Bibles, as several +sorts are needed, and to enable us to assist Missionary work in +foreign countries. Never at any previous time, since first the work +commenced on March 5, 1834, have we had to continue so long a time in +prayer for these funds, without obtaining the answer. The Lord, +however, gave us grace to "continue in prayer," and keep our hearts +in the assurance that He would help. Now, though He delayed long, +before He sent us the answer, in His own time He made it manifest, +that He had not only not shut His ear against our prayer in anger, +but that He had answered them even before we called; for there was +sent today, from the East Indies, a bank order for 100l., which had +been sent off two months since, therefore several days before we even +began to pray. It was left to me to apply this money as it might be +needed. As we had so long, and so particularly prayed for these +funds, I took the whole of it for them, and not for the Orphan-Fund. +--The Lord be praised for this precious answer. It was particularly +precious, as leading the dear brethren and sisters who labour in the +Day Schools, and who comparatively are little accustomed to this way, +to see how good it is to wait upon the Lord. + +Oct. 10. All our wants for the Orphans have been richly supplied +during this week; and today, on my leaving for Trowbridge in the +Lord’s service, I was able to send 5l. 5s. 8d. to the sisters, the +matrons. + +Oct. 11—14. Trowbridge. I have had a good season since I have been +here. The Lord has enabled me to rise very early, and I have thus had +more than two hours of communion with Him before breakfast, the fruit +of which I have felt all the day long. The Lord in mercy continue my +enjoyment!--For the last three weeks I had been asked, yea pressed, +to come here, to minister among the saints; but I could not clearly +see it to be the Lord’s will, and therefore did not go. Now I came, +assured that it was His will, and have been very happy, and greatly +helped in my service here in every way, and I am fully assured that +my labour has not been in vain. How good it is, even for this life, +according to the Lord’s bidding either to go or stay!--I have seen, +whilst here, a young woman, the daughter of a brother and sister who +were in communion with us, but who have both fallen asleep. While her +father was living she hated the truth, but still she came to Bethesda +Chapel. One day, whilst there, she was made to feel the power of the +truth: and, since the death of her parents, the Lord has granted an +answer to their many prayers on her behalf; for she is now standing +on the Lord’s side. Let believing parents continue in prayer for +their children, and let them also continue affectionately and at +suitable times to bring the truth before them, and to bring them to +the preaching of the Word: and in due season it will be manifested +that their labours were not in vain. + +Oct. 14. Yesterday, while at Trowbridge, I received from a sister, +from the neighbourhood of London, 1l. for the Orphans. In the +evening, a sister, a servant, gave me 1s. This morning I gave myself +again to prayer respecting the Orphan-Fund, as I had reason to +believe that there was nothing in hand in Bristol, except several +pounds had come in since I left. Soon after, a sister, a servant, +gave me 5s., and, on leaving in the afternoon, a brother gave me 5l. +When I came home this evening, I found that only 3l. 10s. 8d. had +come in since I left, just sufficient to supply the need up to this +evening, so that the help which the Lord gave at Trowbridge, in +answer to prayer, came very seasonably to supply the need of tomorrow. + +Oct. 20. Tuesday. During these last three days we have again +experienced the continued care of our loving Father on behalf of the +Orphans. On Saturday evening, when again there was no money at all +remaining in my hands, a pair of silver mounted horns was anonymously +left at my house. On the Lord’s day I received 6l. 1s. Yesterday the +Lord sent in still more abundantly; for in the morning came in 12l. +from the neighbourhood of Wolverhampton, and in the evening 2l. was +given to me by D. C. This morning, a few minutes after I had been +thinking that no potatoes had been sent yet for the Orphans, and that +we had no money to lay in a stock (for the 14l. which came in +yesterday was at once sent off), a brother came and informed me that +he had given orders that twenty sacks of good potatoes should be sent +to the Orphan-Houses. Thus our kind Father continually cares for us. + +Oct. 26. Monday. The Lord has been again very kind to us, during +these last days. There came in since Oct. 20, in small donations, +18s. 1d.; for knitting and by sale of stockings, 16s. On Friday last, +besides, there were sold stockings to the amount of 17s. 5d. In the +evening a brother gave me 5l. This 5l. and the money for the +stockings came in very seasonably, as it enabled us to supply the +large demands of the next day. Yesterday morning, when I took my hat +from the rail, I found in one of my gloves a note, containing a 5l. +note and the following words: "2l. for the Orphans, the rest for dear +brother and sister Muller," There came in still further yesterday 2l. +12s. 6d. Thus we are again supplied for about three days. + +In reference to the note which was put into my hat, containing 5l., I +just add, that I had repeatedly asked the Lord for means for our own +personal expenses, previous to the reception of it, as we had but +very little money for ourselves. Indeed the very moment, before I +took my hat from the rail, I had risen from my knees, having again +asked the Lord for means for ourselves and for the Orphans. + +Oct. 30. The evening before last 9s. came in, being the produce of +some work which a sister had done for the benefit of the Orphans; and +early this morning, while my candle was yet burning, a paper was +brought, containing 12s. These two donations, with what little is in +hand besides, supply our need for this day. + +Oct. 31. Saturday. There was no money in hand, My mind was +particularly stirred up to open the box in my house. I did so, and +found 1l. 10s. 7d. in it. The boxes in the Orphan-Houses were +likewise opened, in which was found 8s. Also a brother from Tetbury +gave 2s. 6d. Thus the need of today was supplied. + +Nov. 2. Monday. 1l. 11s, is the need of today, and as 1l. 12s. has +come in since Saturday evening, we are helped for today. + +November 3 and 4. Only 2s. 6d. has come in since Nov. 2nd, but the +necessities of these two days were supplied by means of articles +which had been given to be disposed of. + +Nov. 5. Only 2s. came in yesterday for knitting. We are now, without +any thing, cast upon the Lord. The need of today is 1l. 3s., which I +am unable to send.--Afternoon. There came in at three o’clock 4l. for +some of the articles which had been sent from Stafford, and which had +been sold some time since, so that I was able to send the needful +supplies. There came in 6d. besides. + +Nov. 7. Saturday. Of the 4l. 2s. 6d. which was in hand the day before +yesterday, there was so much left, that, with an addition of 9s. 6d., +all the necessities of today could be supplied. This one of the +labourers gave. + +Nov. 8. Lord’s day. Today the Lord has been again very kind, and +looked upon us in our poverty. Besides the 1l. 10s. for rent, I +received with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, 5l. I was also informed that two +large sacks of oatmeal had been sent from Glasgow as a present. In +addition to all this, a brother told me that he had it in his heart +to give 10l. worth of materials, for winter clothes for the children, +leaving the material to my choice, according to the need, so that +just what was most desirable might be given. (He, accordingly, sent a +few days after, a large pair of good blankets, 32 1/2 yards of mixed +beaver, and 10 1/2 yards of blue beaver for cloaks.) There was also +1s. put into the box at Bethesda, with the words, "Jehovah Jireh." +These words have often been refreshing to my soul for many years +past, and I wrote them with a valuable diamond ring, set with ten +brilliants, which was given to the Orphans about twenty months since, +upon a pane of glass in my room, which circumstance, in remembrance +of the remarkable way in which that valuable ring came, has often +cheered my heart, when in deep poverty my eyes have been cast upon +"JEHOVAH JIREH"(i.e. the Lord will provide) whilst sitting in my room. + +I purposed to have gone to Trowbridge yesterday, and had settled it +so on Friday evening with brother ----. But no sooner had I decided to +do so, than I felt no peace in the prospect of going. After having +prayed about it on Friday evening, and yesterday morning, I +determined not to go, and I felt sure the Lord had some reason for +not allowing me to feel happy in the prospect of going. I began now +to look out for blessings for this day, considering that the Lord had +kept me here for good to some souls. This evening I was especially +led to press the truth on the consciences of the unconverted, +entreating and beseeching them, and telling them also that I felt +sure, the Lord had, in mercy to some of them, kept me from going to +Trowbridge. I spoke on Genesis vi. 1—5. Immediately after I saw fruit +of the Word. An individual fully opened his heart to me. I walked +about with him till about ten o’clock, even as long as I had any +strength left. [About ten days afterwards a brother told me of a poor +drunkard who heard me that evening, and who since then had stayed up +till about twelve o’clock every night to read the Scriptures, and who +had not been intoxicated since.] + +Nov. 11. As only 4s. 6d. had come in for knitting, and 2s. 6d. as a +donation for the Orphans since the 8th, we were now again very poor. +Today there was 9s. more needed than there was in hand, which one of +the labourers gave. There were sent today anonymously, nine sacks of +potatoes, a proof that our Father continues to be mindful of us, +though we are now again so poor. + +Nov. 12. Only 6s. 6d. came in last night, 4s. 6d. of which is the +produce of the work of a sister, and 2s. from a poor afflicted +sister. This 6s. 6d. was very precious in my esteem, because it +showed me afresh our Father’s heart towards us, and it was a little +to begin the day with. No more has come in this morning, when at +twelve I heard from the Orphan-Houses that 1s. 6d. had been received +for knitting, and that about eleven this morning a sovereign was +left, anonymously, at the Girls’-Orphan House. The paper in which the +sovereign was enclosed contained only the letters "A. U. S."--This was +a precious deliverance. We have thus enough for today.--Evening. +There came in still further today for knitting 3s., and a little girl +sent 1s. When I came home this evening, I found that a boy’s jacket +and a sovereign had been left anonymously at my house. Truly, these +deliverances today have been very precious! We have now enough for +tomorrow also. + +Nov. 14. Trowbridge. Saturday. That which came in the evening before +last supplied our need yesterday; but since then nothing has been +received, and therefore there were no means to meet this day’s +demands. I had to go this morning in the Lord’s service to +Trowbridge, feeling assured that His time had now come for my going, +and it required indeed looking at the power, wisdom, and love of our +Father, comfortably to leave my dear fellow-labourers, there being +nothing in hand. My comfort was that the same kind Father who had +provided would provide. + +Nov. 16. Trowbridge. Monday. This morning I received a letter from +Bristol, in which I was informed that on Saturday came in 12s. 6d; +also 9s. was given by one of the labourers. Besides this were +received 3s. by sale of articles, and three small donations, +amounting to 5s. Thus the Lord most mercifully sent in 1l. 9s. 6d., +which was enough to supply the absolute need. + +Nov. 17. Trowbridge. This morning I had again the report from Bristol +about yesterday, in order that, though unable to send means, I might +help with my prayers. In a note written in the morning by brother B., +and sent to my wife, he writes thus: "I know not whether the Lord has +sent in any money for the Orphans or not. I have received none. +Sister ---- (one of the labourers) has given half a ton of coals to +the Boys’-Orphan-House. + +There are coals needed at the Girls’-Orphan-House, and much money for +the ordinary expenses. There is sufficient in all the houses for +dinner. He has said, ‘I will never leave thee nor forsake thee,’ so +that we may boldly say, the Lord is MY helper." In the afternoon of +the same day he writes: "I have delayed writing as long as I could. +The Lord has not sent any thing, but the sisters can do without +taking in bread, and they had money enough to pay for the milk, +except sister ----, who has, however, received a few shillings for some +articles of her own, that she sold. Thus we are supplied with the +absolute necessities for today." In reference to the last lines I +make a few remarks. At first sight it might appear as if it were a +failure of the principles on which we act, that now and then +individuals who are connected with the work have been obliged to sell +articles of their own to procure things which were needed. But let it +be remembered, that under no circumstances prayer for temporal +supplies can be expected to prevail with the Lord, except we are +willing to part with money or any needless articles which we may have +of our own. Indeed an Institution like the one under my care should +not be carried on by any rich believer, on the principles on which +we, by grace, are enabled to act, except it be that he were made +willing himself to give of his own property, as long as he has any +thing, whenever the Institution is in real need. + +Nov. 18. Bristol. This morning at twelve I returned from Trowbridge, +where I had been very happy, and where the Lord evidently used me +this time. How happy a thing it is to go and to stay with the Lord!--I +found that yesterday some money had been put into the orphan-box at +my house, which my wife had reason to believe was at least 1l. She +therefore sent 1l. which had come in for the rent of the +Orphan-Houses, in consideration of this, as she had not the key to +the box. This 1l. met the necessities of yesterday, and with 1s. +additional, which one of the labourers gave, was also enough for the +dinner of today. There came in also yesterday from Clapham, as a +token that the Lord allows us only to be poor for the trial of our +faith, but not in anger, the following articles of clothing: 6 +frocks, 7 pinafores, 4 chemises, 3 pocket handkerchiefs, 2 +petticoats, 3 night caps, 4 work bags (all new) a yard of merino, and +12 silk papers. On my arrival at home I opened the box in my house, +in which I found 2l. 0s. 6d., so that I had 1l. 0s. 6d. to send off, +whereby the usual quantity of bread could be taken in. + +Nov. 19. Since Sept. 18, 1838, this has been, perhaps, of all the +days the most trying. The poverty has been exceedingly great for the +last six days. There had come in no money since yesterday. On this +account no bread could be taken in, as far as the natural prospect +went. Nor was there any money at three in the afternoon to take in +milk for tea, when brother B. came to me. However, we prayed +together, and the Lord had mercy. For one of the labourers found that +he was able, which he knew not before, to give of his own 10s., so +that there were the means to take in the milk, by the time that it is +usually brought. This evening about six there came in still further +10s. 3d. by the sale of Reports. Thus, by the good hand of our God +upon us, we were able to take in bread as usual. How very kind of the +Lord that He sent us an abundance of potatoes and two large sacks of +oatmeal, before this season of deep poverty, as to pecuniary means, +commenced! May the Lord now in great pity look upon us, for we are in +deeper poverty than ever, as with every day it increases, whilst +there is no full deliverance. Thanks be to the Lord that my mind has +been in peace this day also, though our faith has been so very much +tried! Thanks to Him that my mind is in peace now, though there is +nothing but want on every side before me, respecting tomorrow! +Surely, the Lord will again, in His own time, more fully stretch +forth His helping hand! + +Nov. 20. Nothing more had come in this morning. It was nearly three +o’clock this afternoon, when brother B. called on me, to see whether +any thing had come in; but I had received nothing. I was obliged to +go out with a brother from Devonshire, and therefore requested him to +wait till I returned. About a quarter past three I came back, when, +among several persons who were waiting at my house to converse with +me, there was a sister whom I much desired to see about some church +affair. I did so. When I had ended the conversation with her, about +half-past three, she gave me 10l. for the Orphans. More sweet, and +more needed, were none of the previous deliverances. Language cannot +express the real joy in God which I had. I was free from, excitement. +The circumstance did not un-fit me even for a single moment to attend +to my other engagements. I was not in the least surprised, because, +by grace, my soul had been waiting on God for deliverance. Never had +help been so long delayed. In none of the houses was milk for tea, +and in one even no bread, and there was no money to purchase either. +It was only a few minutes before the milkman came, when brother B. +arrived at the Orphan-Houses with the money. Yet even now it was more +than an hour before the usual tea time. The Lord be praised for this +deliverance! Such a week of deep poverty, as we have had since Nov. +13, we never had before. Yet, thanks to the Lord! we have lacked +nothing, and we have been kept from dishonouring Him by unbelief. I +further notice respecting this day, that before this 10l. was +received there was sent to the Infant-Orphan-House a cart load of +clumps of wood, when there were neither coals, nor money to buy any. + +Nov. 21. Saturday evening. The 10l. which came in yesterday afternoon +is all expended. Again I have not a penny in hand. We are, however, +brought to the close of another week, and have now, a little at +least, replenished our provision stock; and should the Lord permit us +to enter upon another week, He will surely provide according to our +need. + +Nov. 22. Lord’s day. The Lord has been again mindful of our need, and +has sent us in the means to meet the demands of two days. Besides the +1l. 10s. which came in for rent, a brother gave me this morning two +sovereigns, a sister from a distance sent it., and a brother, who +spent this day with us, put 12s. 6d. into the box at my house, which +our need soon brought out. + +Nov. 23. This evening were given, after all the money had been again +disbursed, 2 gold rings, 5 small silver coins, a silver ring, 5 +silver studs, a silver buckle, a pair of ear-rings, a necklace, and a +little box. + +Nov. 25. As only 3s. 6d. had come in for knitting since the 22nd, we +were now again very poor. The boxes in the Orphan-Houses were opened, +but only 1s. was found in them. In this our poverty 6l. came in this +afternoon for some of the articles which had been sent from Stafford +on Oct. 3rd, and which had been sold some time since. This money had +been expected for some time, but came in only now, in this our great +need. In the evening came in still further 2l. from the East Indies. + +Nov. 26. Today were sent from Newport, near Barnstaple, 2 rings, a +brooch and 4s. + +Nov. 27. This morning I received 4l. from a sister in Dublin, before +we were really in need; but this donation came very seasonably to +meet the large demands of tomorrow, Saturday, for which there is +nothing in hand. There was also taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, this afternoon, 2l. 12s. 6d. + +Nov. 28. Saturday. There has come in again 1l. today. Thus the Lord +has bountifully supplied our need during this week, always sending +the means without allowing us to be so deeply tried as during the two +previous weeks. + +Nov. 29. The Lord’s loving hand has again today provided richly for +the Orphans, for at least two days. There came in altogether 6l. 19s. +6d. + +Dec. 1. Today we were so poor as to the Orphan-Fund, that we should +not have been able to meet the demands of the day; but the Lord’s +loving heart remembered us. There came in this morning 5l. 7s. for +some of the articles which were sent some time since from Stafford. I +have purposely again and again mentioned how the help, which the love +of some saints at Leeds and Stafford sent, delivered us, that it +might be manifest that those donors were directed by the Lord in this +matter. + +Dec. 2. When today there was again but little money in hand, because +of the disbursements of yesterday, D. C. brought me 2l., which his +wife a sister had saved out of housekeeping, for the benefit of the +Orphans. About an hour, after I had received this 2l., there was +sent, in two post-office-orders, 6l. 4s. 6d. by a sister, being the +produce of the sale of some trinkets; of which sum one half is to be +used for the benefit of the Orphans, and the other half for my own +personal necessities. Thus the Lord has by this donation also +provided for myself and family, when we were in much need. + +Dec. 5. Saturday morning. Yesterday afternoon a sister left two +sovereigns at my house for the Orphans. The Lord in the love of His +heart, remembered our Saturday’s necessities, and sent in this +supply; for there was only 18s. 6d. in hand when this money came, and +2l. 12s. is needed for this day. Evening. As there was now again only +6s. 6d. in hand, I gave myself to prayer, and immediately after I had +risen from my knees, 1l. 5s. 6d. was given to me, for things which +had been sold, being chiefly articles which had been sent from +Stafford. There was also a flute left anonymously at my house, this +evening. + +Dec. 6. Today there came in still further 2l. 2s. 6d. + +Dec. 7. Again 1l. 11s. has come in. + +Dec. 9. Morning. This is the last day of the fifth year of the Orphan +work. Hitherto the Lord has helped us! This morning there was only +1l. 1s. 9d. in hand, but 1l. 7s. was needed for the supply of today. +I therefore opened the box in my house, in which 2s. 6d. was found. +This 1l. 4s. 3d. I sent off to the Orphan-Houses. Evening. There came +in during this day 1l. 6s. 6d.; out of this I had to pay away 1l. +2s., so that now, at the close of the year, though the balance +amounts to 15l. 0s. 6 1/4d., there is only 4s. 6 1/4d. in hand, as +the rest has been put by for the rent, which is due up to this time. +With this 4s. 6 1/4d. we have now to commence the sixth year, leaning +upon the living God, who most assuredly during this year also will +help us in every way, as our circumstances may call for it. + + + +At the close of these details (with reference to the year from Dec. +9, 1839, to Dec. 9, 1840) I make a few remarks in connexion with them. + +1. Though our trials of faith during this year also have been many, +and recurring more frequently than during any previous year, and +though we have been often reduced to the greatest extremity, yet the +Orphans have lacked nothing; for they have always had good nourishing +food, and the necessary articles of clothing, etc. + +2. Should it be supposed by any one in reading the plain details of +our trials of faith during this year, that on account of them we have +been disappointed in our expectations, or are discouraged in the +work, my answer is, that the very reverse is the fact. Such days were +expected from the commencement of the work; nay, more than this, the +chief end for which the Institution was established is, that the +Church of Christ at large might be benefited by seeing manifestly the +hand of God stretched out on our behalf in the hour of need, in +answer to prayer. Our desire, therefore, is not that we may be +without trials of faith, but that the Lord graciously would be +pleased to support us in the trial, that we may not dishonour Him by +distrust. + +3. This way of living brings the Lord remarkably near, He is, as it +were, morning by morning inspecting our stores, that accordingly He +may send help. Greater and more manifest nearness of the Lord’s +presence I have never had, than when after breakfast there were no +means for dinner, and then the Lord provided the dinner for more than +one hundred persons; or when, after dinner, there were no means for +the tea, and yet the Lord provided the tea; and all this without one +single human being having been informed about our need. This moreover +I add, that although we, who have been eye witnesses of these +gracious interpositions of our Father, have not been so benefited by +them as we might and ought to have been, yet we have in some measure +derived blessing from them. One thing is certain, that we are not +tired of doing the Lord’s work in this way. + +4. It has been more that once observed, that such a way of living +must lead the mind continually to think whence food, clothes, etc., +are to come, and so unfit for spiritual exercises. Now, in the first +place, I answer, that our minds are very little tried about the +necessaries of life, just because the care respecting them is laid +upon our Father, who, because we are His children, not only allows us +to do so, but will have us to do so. Secondly, it must be remembered, +that, even if our minds were much tried about the supplies for the +children, and the means for the other work, yet, because we look to +the Lord alone for these things, we should only be brought, by our +sense of need, into the presence of our Father, for the supply of it; +and that is a blessing, and no injury to the soul. Thirdly, our souls +realize that for the glory of God and for the benefit of the church +at large, it is that we have these trials of faith, and that leads +again to God, to ask Him for fresh supplies of grace, to be enabled +to be faithful in this service. + +5. My heart’s desire and prayer to God is, that all believers, who +read this, may by these many answers to prayer be encouraged to pray, +particularly as it regards the conversion of their friends and +relations, their own state of heart, the state of the Church at +large, and the success of the preaching of the gospel. Do not think, +dear reader, that these things are peculiar to us, and cannot be +enjoyed by all the saints. Although every child of God is not called +by the Lord to establish Schools and Orphan-Houses, and to trust in +the Lord for means for them; yet there is nothing on the part of the +Lord to hinder, why you may not know by experience, far more +abundantly than we do now, His willingness to answer the prayers of +His children. Do but prove the faithfulness of God. Do but carry your +every want to Him. Only maintain an upright heart. But if you live in +sin; if you wilfully and habitually do things, respecting which you +know that they are contrary to the will of God, then you cannot +expect to be heard by Him. "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the +Lord will not hear me: but verily God hath heard me; He hath attended +to the voice of my prayer." Psalm lxvi. 18, 19. + +6. As it regards the children of God, who by the labour of their +hands, or in any business or profession, earn their bread, +particularly the poorer classes of them, I give my affectionate yet +solemn advice, to carry into practice the principles on which this +Institution is conducted, as it regards not going in debt. Are you in +debt? then make confession of sin respecting it. Sincerely confess to +the Lord that you have sinned against Rom. xiii. 8. And if you are +resolved no more to contract debt, whatever may be the result, and +you are waiting on the Lord, and truly trust in Him, your present +debts will soon be paid. Are you out of debt? then whatever your +future want may be, be resolved, in the strength of Jesus, rather to +suffer the greatest privation, whilst waiting upon God for help, than +to use unscriptural means, such as borrowing, taking goods on credit, +etc., to deliver yourselves. This way needs but to be tried, in order +that its excellency may be enjoyed. + + + +On Dec. 14, 15, 16, and 25, we had public meetings, at which the +account of the Lord’s dealings with us during the last year, in +respect of the Orphan-Houses, Schools, etc., was given, for the +benefit of any who desired to come. The preceding part of the +Narrative gives the substance of what was stated at those meetings, +in reference to the many answers to prayer which the Lord has granted +to us during the past year. There are a few points more, which may be +of interest to the believing reader, and which were then mentioned, +which I shall now add. + +1. There have been, during this year also, six Day Schools for poor +children, entirely supported by the funds of the Institution, all of +which have been established by us. + +Besides this, the rent for the school room of a seventh School, +carried on by a sister, who is known to us, has been paid and two +other such Schools, out of Bristol, have been assisted with Bibles +and Testaments. + +The number of all the children that have had schooling in the Day +Schools through the medium of the Institution, since its formation, +amounts to 2216; the number of those at present in the six Day +Schools is 303. + +These Day Schools have defrayed, by the payments of the children, +about the sixth part of their own expenses. + +2. There is one Sunday School entirely supported by the funds of the +Institution. + +3. There has been since the formation of the Institution one Adult +School connected with it, in which, on the Lord’s day afternoons, +since that time, about 150 adults have been instructed. + +This School has been discontinued at the close of this year, and +instead of it it is purposed to have a regular Evening School for +adults who cannot read. It is purposed to instruct them for about an +hour and a half in reading and writing twice a week, and afterwards +to read the Scriptures for a short time to them, and to bring the +truth before them. The School will commence at seven o’clock in the +evening, and the instruction will be altogether free. + +4. The number of Bibles and Testaments which have been circulated +through the medium of the Institution, during the last year, amounts +to 452 copies. + +There have been circulated, since March 5, 1834, six thousand and +forty-four copies of the Scriptures. + +5. There have been laid out during the last year, of the funds of the +Institution, 120l. 10s. 2d. for Missionary purposes. + +6. There are at present 91 Orphans in the three houses. The total +number of the Orphans who have been under our care from April 11, +1836, to Dec. 9, 1840, amounts to 129. + +I notice further the following points in connexion with the +Orphan-Houses. + +1. Without any one having been asked for any thing by us, the sum of +3,937l. 1s. 1d. has been given to us, as the result of prayer to God, +since the commencement of the work. 2. Besides this also, a great +variety of provisions, clothes, furniture, etc. 3. Though there has +been during this year as much, or more sickness, in the +Orphan-Houses, than during any previous year; yet I own to the praise +of the Lord publicly, that it has been very little, considering the +number of the children. + +For the future we purpose, according to the time, means, etc., which +the Lord may be pleased to give us, to attend to a fifth object, the +circulation of such publications, as may be beneficial, with the +blessing of God, to benefit both believers and unbelievers. We +purpose either to buy or print tracts for unbelievers, and to sell +them, or have them distributed, as opportunity maybe given; and to +buy or print such publications, for circulation, as may be +instrumental in directing the minds of believers to those truths +which in these last days are more especially needed, or have been +particularly lost sight of, and which may lead believers to return to +the written word of God. + + + +THE BLESSING OF THE LORD UPON THE WORK IN REFERENCE TO THE SOULS OF +THE CHILDREN. + + + +1. During the last fourteen months there have been meetings purposely +for children, at which the Scriptures have been expounded to them. At +these meetings an almost universal attention is manifested by them, +which I thankfully ascribe to the Lord, and upon which I look as a +forerunner of greater blessing. + +2. During the last year three of the Sunday School children have been +received into fellowship. + +3. At the end of last year there had been eight Orphans received into +communion: during the present year fourteen have been received: in +all twenty-two. + +4. Of those two who died during this year, one was an infant, and the +other a girl about twelve years old. The latter, on the whole, a well +behaved child, was for months ill in consumption before she died. The +nearer she came to the end of her life, the greater was the +solicitude of those under whose care she was, respecting the state of +her heart, as she was evidently unprepared for eternity. But now we +saw, what never had been witnessed in any other of the children to +such a degree. This, on the whole, naturally amiable, meek, and quiet +child, manifested not merely complete indifference to the truth, the +nearer she came to the close of her life; but also showed much +aversion, and, as far as she could, great enmity to the truth. At +last she was evidently dying, yet altogether unprepared for death. In +this state all the Orphans in the Girls’-Orphan-House were assembled +together, and the awful state of’ this dying child was pointed out to +the unbelieving Orphans as a warning, and to the believing Orphans as +a subject for gratitude to God on behalf of themselves, that they, by +grace, were in a different state; and it was laid on their hearts to +give themselves to prayer for their dying companion. The labourers in +the work were sustained to hope still, and to pray still, though +Charlotte Lee remained opposed to the truth while in this dying +state. However, unexpectedly she lived ten days longer, and about two +days before her death she was so altogether different, that we have +hope in her end. + +It was stated in the last year’s Report, that we were looking for +fruit upon our labours as it regards the conversion of the children, +as the Lord had given to us a measure of earnestness in praying for +them. The Lord has dealt with us according to our expectations. But I +expect far more than what we have seen. While the chief object of our +work has been, and is still, the manifestation of the heart of God +towards His children, and the reality of power with God in prayer; +yet, as we hoped, and as it has been our prayer, the Lord gives to us +also the joy of seeing one child after another brought to stand +openly on the Lord’s side.--As far as my experience goes, it appears +to me that believers generally have expected far too little of +present fruit upon their labours among children. There has been a +hoping that the Lord some day or other would own the instruction +which they give to children, and would answer at some time or other, +though after many years only, the prayers which they offer up on +their behalf. Now, while such passages as Proverbs xxii. 6, +Ecclesiastes xi. 1, Galatians vi. 9, 1 Cor. xv. 58, give unto us +assurance not merely respecting every thing which we do for the Lord, +in general, but also respecting bringing up children in the fear of +the Lord, in particular, that our labour is not in vain in the Lord; +yet we have to guard against abusing such passages, by thinking it a +matter of little moment whether we see present fruit or not; but, on +the contrary, we should give the Lord no rest till we see present +fruit, and therefore in persevering, yet submissive, prayer, we +should make known our requests unto God. I add, as an encouragement +to believers who labour among children, that during the last two +years, seventeen other young persons or children, from the age of +eleven and a half to seventeen, have been received into fellowship +among us, and that I am looking out now for many more to be +converted, and that not merely of the Orphans, but of the Sunday and +Day School children. As in so many respects we live in remarkable +times, so in this respect also, that the Lord is working greatly +among the children in many places. + +I most earnestly solicit all who know the reality of our privilege as +the children of God, even that we have power with God, to help us +with their prayers, that many more of the children may soon be +converted, and that those who have made a profession of faith in the +Lord Jesus may be enabled so to walk, as that the name of Jesus may +be magnified by them. The believing reader must know how great the +aim of Satan will be to lead those children, who, from nine years +old, and upward, have been received into fellowship, back again into +the world, and thereby seek to lead believers to give up looking for +real conversion among children. + +The total of the expenses connected with the objects of-the +Institution, exclusive of the Orphan-Houses, from Nov. 19, 1839, to +Nov. 19, 1840, is 622l. 2s. 6 1/2d. The balance in hand on Nov. 19, +1840, was 13l. 2s. 9 3/4d. + +The total of the expenses connected with the three Orphan-Houses, +from Dec. 9, 1839, to Dec. 9, 1840, is 900l. 11s. 2 1/2d. The balance +in hand on Dec. 9, 1840, was 15l. 0s. 6 1/4d. + + + +Dec. 23. There was sent to us for ourselves, anonymously, a piece of +beef, which came very seasonably, as we are just now again very poor. + +Dec. 26. This morning a poor brother, who, like ourselves, lives in +dependence upon the Lord for his temporal supplies, whilst serving +the Lord in the ministry of the Word, and who has been several days +staying with us, gave to my wife 3s. 6d., for our own personal +necessities, saying, that we might need it. This is indeed a most +remarkable donation, both because of the individual from whom it +came, and because of its having been given just now; for without it +we should not have been able to provide for our temporal necessities +this day. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1840. + + + +I. As to the church. + +68 brethren and sisters brother Craik and I found in communion, when +we came to Bristol. + +687 have been admitted into communion since we came to Bristol. + +755 would be, therefore, the total number of those in fellowship with +us, had there been no changes. But + +79 have left Bristol. + +55 have left us, but are still in Bristol. + +44 are under church discipline. + +52 have fallen asleep. + +230 are therefore to be deducted from 755, so that there are only 525 +at present in communion. + +114 have been added during the past year, of whom 47 have been +brought to the knowledge of the Lord among us, 24 besides, though +they knew the Lord, had never been in fellowship any where; 43 had +been at some time or other in fellowship, but most of them with +saints not residing in Bristol. + + + +II. As to the supply of my temporal necessities: + +1. The Lord has been pleased to send me by the Freewill Offerings of +the saints among whom I labour, through the instrumentality of the +boxes £128 5s. 10 1/2d. + +2. Through saints in and out of Bristol, by presents in money £100 +5s. 1d. + +3. Through family connection £8 18s. 0d. + +4. In provisions, clothes, etc. worth to us at least £5 0s. 0d. + +Altogether £242 8s. 11 1/2d. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Narrative of some of the Lord's +Dealings with George Müller, by George Müller + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LORD'S DEALINGS WITH GEORGE MÜLLER *** + +***** This file should be named 22034-8.txt or 22034-8.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/2/0/3/22034/ + +Produced by the Bookworm (bookworm.librivox AT gmail.com) + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project +Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you +charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. If you +do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the +rules is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose +such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and +research. They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do +practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks. Redistribution is +subject to the trademark license, especially commercial +redistribution. + + + +*** START: FULL LICENSE *** + +THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE +PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK + +To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free +distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work +(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project +Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project +Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at +http://gutenberg.org/license). + + +Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic works + +1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to +and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property +(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all +the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy +all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession. +If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the +terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or +entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. + +1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be +used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who +agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few +things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works +even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See +paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement +and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works. See paragraph 1.E below. + +1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation" +or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the +collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an +individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are +located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from +copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative +works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg +are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project +Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by +freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of +this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with +the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by +keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project +Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others. + +1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern +what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in +a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check +the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement +before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or +creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project +Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning +the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United +States. + +1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: + +1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate +access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently +whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the +phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project +Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, +copied or distributed: + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + +1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived +from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is +posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied +and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees +or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work +with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the +work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 +through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the +Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or +1.E.9. + +1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted +with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution +must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional +terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked +to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the +permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. + +1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm +License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this +work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. + +1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this +electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without +prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with +active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project +Gutenberg-tm License. + +1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, +compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any +word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or +distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than +"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version +posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org), +you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a +copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon +request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other +form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm +License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. + +1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, +performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works +unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. + +1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing +access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided +that + +- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from + the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method + you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is + owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he + has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the + Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments + must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you + prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax + returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and + sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the + address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to + the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." + +- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies + you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he + does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm + License. You must require such a user to return or + destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium + and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of + Project Gutenberg-tm works. + +- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any + money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the + electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days + of receipt of the work. + +- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free + distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. + +1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set +forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from +both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael +Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark. Contact the +Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. + +1.F. + +1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable +effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread +public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm +collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain +"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or +corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual +property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a +computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by +your equipment. + +1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right +of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project +Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all +liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal +fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT +LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE +PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH F3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE +TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE +LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR +INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH +DAMAGE. + +1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a +defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can +receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a +written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you +received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with +your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with +the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a +refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity +providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to +receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy +is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further +opportunities to fix the problem. + +1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth +in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER +WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO +WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. + +1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied +warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. +If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the +law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be +interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by +the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any +provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. + +1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the +trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone +providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance +with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, +promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works, +harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, +that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do +or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm +work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any +Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause. + + +Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm + +Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of +electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers +including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists +because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from +people in all walks of life. + +Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the +assistance they need, is critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's +goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will +remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure +and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations. +To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation +and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 +and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org. + + +Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive +Foundation + +The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit +501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the +state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal +Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification +number is 64-6221541. Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at +http://pglaf.org/fundraising. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg +Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent +permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. + +The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S. +Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered +throughout numerous locations. Its business office is located at +809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email +business@pglaf.org. Email contact links and up to date contact +information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official +page at http://pglaf.org + +For additional contact information: + Dr. Gregory B. Newby + Chief Executive and Director + gbnewby@pglaf.org + + +Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg +Literary Archive Foundation + +Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide +spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of +increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be +freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest +array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations +($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt +status with the IRS. + +The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating +charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United +States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a +considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up +with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations +where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To +SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any +particular state visit http://pglaf.org + +While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we +have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition +against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who +approach us with offers to donate. + +International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make +any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from +outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. + +Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation +methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other +ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. +To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate + + +Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works. + +Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm +concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared +with anyone. For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project +Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. + + +Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. +unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily +keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. + + +Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: + + http://www.gutenberg.org + +This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, +including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to +subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. diff --git a/22034-8.zip b/22034-8.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..8aa889e --- /dev/null +++ b/22034-8.zip diff --git a/22034.txt b/22034.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..64d4f3e --- /dev/null +++ b/22034.txt @@ -0,0 +1,7465 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Narrative of some of the Lord's Dealings +with George Mueller, by George Mueller + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Narrative of some of the Lord's Dealings with George Mueller + Written by Himself. Second Part + +Author: George Mueller + +Release Date: July 10, 2007 [EBook #22034] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LORD'S DEALINGS WITH GEORGE MUeLLER *** + + + + +Produced by the Bookworm (bookworm.librivox AT gmail.com) + + + + + +A NARRATIVE OF SOME OF THE LORD'S DEALINGS WITH GEORGE MUeLLER + +WRITTEN BY HIMSELF + +SECOND PART + + +PREFACE TO THE + +FIRST EDITION OF THE SECOND PART. + +THROUGH grace I am, in some measure, conscious of my many weaknesses +and deficiencies; but, with all this, I know that I am a member of +the body of Christ, and that, as such, I have a place of service in +the body. The realization of this has laid upon me the responsibility +of serving the church in the particular way for which the Lord has +fitted me, and this has led me to write this second little volume, if +by any means those of my fellow-saints, who have not yet learned the +importance and preciousness of dealing with God Himself under all +circumstances, may be helped in learning this lesson. Nor did I think +that the first part of this Narrative rendered the second part +needless, because that contains more especially the Lord's dealings +with me as an individual, whilst this gives, more particularly, an +account of the remarkable way in which the Lord has helped me in +reference to His work in my hands. For this second part carries on +the account of the Orphan-Houses, etc., which are under my care, and +contains the substance of the Reports previously published, so that +any one who wishes to have the account from the beginning up to the +end of last year, may be able to obtain it. This latter point alone +made it needful for me to think about publishing this second part, as +of the Reports for 1838 and 1839, which still almost daily are +inquired after, there are only a few copies left, though 2,500 of the +one and 3,000 of the other were published and of the Report for 1840 +there are also only about 500, out of 4,000, remaining. The being +thus able to put the whole account of the work into the hands of an +inquiring individual, affords such a one a fairer opportunity of +seeing the working of those scriptural principles on which the +Institution is established. And, lastly, the Lord's continued +blessing upon the first part of the Narrative and the Reports, both +to believers and unbelievers, has induced me to publish this second +volume, which I now affectionately commend to the prayers of the +saints, requesting at the same time their prayers for myself. + +GEORGE MULLER. + +Bristol, June 14, 1841. + + + +SECOND PART + +In publishing the continuation of the Narrative of some of the Lord's +dealings with me, I have thought it well to give it in the same form +in which the larger portion of the former part is written. I +therefore proceed to give extracts from my journal making here and +there such remarks as occasion may seem to require. The first, part +of the Narrative was carried on to the beginning of July 1837, from +which period the Continuation commences. + +July 18, 1837. Four trials came upon me this morning, without my +having previously had opportunity for secret prayer. I had been +prevented from rising early, on account of having to spend part of +the night in a sick chamber; but this circumstance shows, how +important it is to rise early, when we are able, in order that we may +be prepared, by communion with the Lord, to meet the trials of the +day. + +Aug. 15. Today the first 500 copies of my Narrative arrived, and I +had, once more, some conflict of mind whether, after all, I had not +been mistaken in this matter. A sort of trembling came over me, and a +wish to be able to retrace the step. Judging, however, from the most +searching self-examination, through which I had caused my heart to +pass again and again, as to my motives, before I began writing, and +whilst I was writing; and judging, moreover, from the earnestness in +prayer with which I had sought to ascertain the mind of God in the +matter, and from the subsequent full assurance which I had had of its +being according to His will, that in this way I should serve the +Church;--I was almost immediately led to consider this uncomfortable +and trying feeling as a temptation, and I therefore went to the box, +opened it, brought out some copies, and soon after gave away one, so +that the step could not be retraced. [This was the last temptation or +struggle I have had of that kind; for, though, very many times since, +I have had abundant reason for praising the Lord that He put such an +honour upon me, in allowing me to speak well of His name in so public +a manner, I have never since, even for one minute, been allowed to +regret publishing the Narrative; and almost daily have I been more +and more confirmed in the conviction, that the giving such like +publications to the church, making known the Lord's dealings with me, +is one part of my service towards the saints.] + +Aug. 17. Today two more children were received into the Infant +Orphan-House, which makes up our full number, 66 in the Girls' and +infant-Orphan-Houses. + +Aug. 28. When brother Craik and I began to labour in Bristol, and +consequently some believers united with us in fellowship, assembling +together at Bethesda, we began meeting together on the basis of the +written Word only, without having any church rules whatever. From the +commencement it was understood, that, as the Lord should help us, we +would try everything by the word of God, and introduce and hold fast +that only which could be proved by Scripture. When we came to this +determination on Aug. 13, 1832, it was indeed in weakness, but it was +in uprightness of heart.--On account of this it was, that, as we +ourselves were not fully settled as to whether those only who had +been baptized after they had believed, or whether all who believed in +the Lord Jesus, irrespective of baptism, should be received into +fellowship nothing was determined about this point. We felt free to +break bread and be in communion with those who were not baptized, and +therefore could with a good conscience labour at Gideon, where the +greater part of the saints, at least at first, were unbaptized; but, +at the same time, we had a secret wish that none but believers who +were baptized might be united with us at Bethesda. Our reason for +this was, that we had witnessed in Devonshire much painful disunion, +resulting, as we thought, from baptized and unbaptized believers +being in fellowship. Without, then, making it a rule, that Bethesda +Church was to be one of close communion, we nevertheless took care +that those who applied for fellowship should be instructed about +baptism. For many months there occurred no difficulty, as none +applied for communion but such as had either been already baptized, +or wished to be, or who became convinced of the Scriptural character +of believers' baptism, after we had conversed with them; afterwards, +however, three sisters applied for fellowship, none of whom had been +baptized; nor were their views altered, after we had conversed with +them. As, nevertheless, brother Craik and I considered them true +believers, and we ourselves were not fully convinced what was the +mind of the Lord in such a case, we thought it right that these +sisters should be received; yet so that it might be unanimously, as +all our church acts then were done; but we knew by that time, that +there were several in fellowship with us, who could not +conscientiously receive unbaptized believers. We mentioned, +therefore, the names of these three sisters to the church, stating +that they did not see believers' baptism to be scriptural, and that, +if any brother saw, on that account, a reason why they should not be +received, he should let us know. The result was, that several +objected, and two or three meetings were held, at which we heard the +objections of the brethren, and sought for ourselves to obtain +acquaintance with the mind of God on the point. Whilst several days +thus passed away before the matter was decided, one of those three +sisters came and thanked us, that we had not received her, before +being baptized, for she now saw that it was only shame and the fear +of man which had kept her back, and that the Lord had now made her +willing to be baptized. By this circumstance those brethren, who +considered it scriptural that all ought to be baptized before being +received into fellowship, were confirmed in their views; and as to +brother Craik and me, it made us, at least, still more question, +whether, those brethren might not be right; and we felt therefore, +that in such a state of mind we could not oppose them. The one +sister, therefore, who wished to be baptized, was received into +fellowship, but the two others not. Our consciences were the less +affected by this, because all, though not baptized, might take the +Lord's supper with us, at Bethesda, though not be received into full +fellowship; and because at Gideon, where there were baptized and +unbaptized believers, they might even be received into full +fellowship; for we had not then clearly seen that there is no +scriptural distinction between being in fellowship with individuals +and breaking bread with them. Thus matters stood for many months, +i.e. believers were received to the breaking of bread even at +Bethesda, though not baptized, but they were not received to all the +privileges of fellowship.--In August of 1836 I had a conversation with +brother H. C. on the subject of receiving the unbaptized into +communion, a subject about which, for years, my mind had been more or +less exercised. This brother put the matter thus before me: either +unbaptized believers come under the class of persons who walk +disorderly, and, in that case, we ought to withdraw from them (2 +Thess. iii. 6); or they do not walk disorderly. If a believer be +walking disorderly, we are not merely to withdraw from him at the +Lord's table, but our behaviour towards him ought to be decidedly +different from what it would be were he not walking disorderly, on +all occasions when we may have intercourse with him, or come in any +way into contact with him, Now this is evidently not the case in the +conduct of baptized believers towards their unbaptized fellow-believers. +The Spirit does not suffer it to be so, but He witnesses that +their not having been baptized does not necessarily imply +that they are walking disorderly; and hence there may be the +most precious communion between baptized and unbaptized believers. +The Spirit does not suffer us to refuse fellowship with them in +prayer, in reading and searching the Scriptures, in social and +intimate intercourse, and in the Lord's work; and yet this ought to +be the case, were they walking disorderly.--This passage, 2 Thess. +iii. 6, to which brother R. C. referred, was the means of showing me +the mind of the Lord on the subject, which is, that we ought to +receive all whom Christ has received (Rom. xv. 7), irrespective of +the measure of grace or knowledge which they have attained unto.--Some +time after this conversation, in May 1837, an opportunity occurred, +when we (for brother Craik had seen the same truth) were called upon +to put into practice the light which the Lord had been pleased to +give us. A sister, who neither had been baptized, nor considered +herself under any obligation to be baptized, applied for fellowship. +We conversed with her on this as on other subjects, and proposed her +for fellowship, though our conversation had not convinced her that +she ought to be baptized. This led the church again to the +consideration of the point. We gave our reasons, from Scripture, for +considering it right to receive this unbaptized sister to all the +privileges of the children of God; but a considerable number, +one-third perhaps, expressed conscientious difficulty in receiving +her. The example of the Apostles in baptizing the first believers +upon a profession of faith, was especially urged, which indeed would +be an insurmountable difficulty, had not the truth been mingled with +error for so long a time, so that it does not prove willful +disobedience, if any one in our day should refuse to be baptized +after believing. The Lord, however, gave us much help in pointing out +the truth to the brethren, so that the number of those, who +considered that only baptized believers should be in communion, +decreased almost daily. At last, only fourteen brethren and sisters +out of above 180, thought it right, this Aug. 28, 1837, to separate +from us, after we had had much intercourse with them. [I am glad to +be able to add, that, even of these 14, the greater part afterwards +saw their error, and came back again to us, and that the receiving of +all who love our Lord Jesus into full communion, irrespective of +baptism, has never been the source of disunion among us, though more +than forty-four years have passed away since.] + +Sept. 2. I have been looking about for a house for the Orphan Boys, +these last three days. Every thing else has been provided. The Lord +has given suitable individuals to take care of the children, money, +&c. In His own time He will give a house also. + +Sept. 6. This morning I accompanied a sister, who had been staying a +night with us, to the steamer. In answer to prayer I awoke at the +right time, the fly came at half-past five, her trunk was got from +the vessel in which she came yesterday, and we arrived before the +steamer had left. In all these four points I felt my dependence upon +the Lord, and He, having put prayer into my heart, answered it in +each of these four particulars. + +Sept. 15. This evening we had a meeting for inquirers and applicants +for fellowship. There were more than we could see within three hours; +and when all strength was gone, we had to send away four. Among those +whom we saw was E. W., who had been kept for some time from applying +for fellowship, on account of not seeing believers' baptism to be +scriptural. She wished to be taught, but could not see it. She felt +grieved that on that account she could not attend to the breaking of +bread, which she did see to be scriptural. As soon as open communion +was brought about at Bethesda, she wished to offer herself for +fellowship, but was twice prevented by circumstances from doing so. +Last Wednesday evening she came to the baptizing, when once more, +after the lapse of more than two years, I preached on baptism, which +fully convinced her of its being scriptural, and she desires now to +be baptized. Her difficulty was, that she thought she had been +baptized with the Spirit, and therefore needed no water baptism, +which now, from Acts x. 44-47, she sees to be an unscriptural +objection.--Though it is only one month this day since my Narrative +was published, I have already heard of many instances in which the +Lord has been pleased to bless it. + +This morning we received a parcel with clothes and some money for the +Orphans, from a sister at a distance. Among the donations in money +was a little legacy, amounting to 6s. 6 1/2d. from a dear boy, the +nephew of the sister who sent the things, who died in the faith. This +dear child had had given to him, in his last illness, some new +shillings, sixpences, and other smaller silver coins, amounting to +the above-mentioned little sum. Shortly before he fell asleep, he +requested that this his little treasure might be sent to the Orphans. +This precious little legacy is the first we have had. + +Sept. 19. Two things were today particularly impressed upon my heart, +and may the Lord deepen the impression. 1. That I ought to seek for +more retirement, though the work should apparently suffer ever so +much. 2. That arrangements should be made, whereby I may be able to +visit the brethren more, as an unvisited church will sooner or later +become an unhealthy church. Pastors, as fellow-labourers, are greatly +needed among us. + +Sept. 28, I have for a long time been too much outwardly engaged. +Yesterday morning I spent about three hours in the vestry of Gideon, +to be able to have more time for retirement. I meant to do the same +in the afternoon, but before I could leave the house I was called on, +and thus one person after the other came, till I had to go out. Thus +it has been again today. + +Oct. 16. For a long time past brother Craik and I have felt the +importance of more pastoral visiting, and it has been one of our +greatest trials, that we have been unable to give more time to it. +This evening we had purposely a meeting of the two Churches, at which +brother Craik and I spoke on; I. The importance of pastoral visiting. +II. The particular obstacles which hindered us in attending to it. +III. The question whether there was any way of removing some of the +obstacles. + +I. As to the importance of pastoral visiting, the following points +were mentioned: 1. Watching over the saints, by means of visiting +them, to prevent coldness, or to recover them from backsliding. 2. To +counsel and advise them in family affairs, in their business, and in +spiritual matters. 3. To keep up that loving familiar intercourse, +which is so desirable between the saints and those who have the +oversight of them.--These visits should be, if possible, frequent; but +in our case there have been several obstacles in the way. + +II. The particular obstacles in our case are: 1. The largeness of the +number who are in communion with us. One hundred would be quite as +many as we have strength to visit regularly, and as often as would be +desirable; but there are nearly 400 in fellowship with us. 2. The +distance of the houses of the saints from our own dwellings, as many +live more than two miles of. 3. The Lord's blessing upon our labours. +Not one year has passed away, since we have been in Bristol, without +more than fifty having been added to our number, each of whom, in +general, needed several times to be conversed with before being +admitted into fellowship. 4. That brother Craik and I have each of us +the care of two churches. At the first sight it appears as if the +work is thus divided, but the double number of meetings, &c., nearly +double the work. 5. The mere ruling, and taking care, in general, of +a large body of believers, irrespective of the other work, takes much +more time, and requires much more strength, than the taking care of a +small body of believers, as we, by grace, desire not to allow known +sin among us. 6. The position which we have in the church at large +brings many brethren to us who travel through Bristol, who call on +us, or lodge with us, and to whom, according to the Lord's will, we +have to give some time. 7. In my own case an extensive needful +correspondence. 8. The weakness of body on the part of both of us. +When the preaching is done,--when the strangers who lodge with us are +gone,--when the calls at our house are over,--when the needful +letters, however briefly, are written,--when the necessary church +business is settled;--our minds are often so worn out, that we are +glad to be quiet. 9. But suppose we have bodily strength remaining +after the above things have been attended to, yet the frame of mind +is not always so, as that one could visit. After having been +particularly tried by church matters, which in so large a body does +not rarely occur, or being cast down in one's own soul, one may be +fit for the closet, but not for visiting the saints. 10. Lastly, in +my own case, no small part of my time is taken up by attending to the +affairs of the Orphan-Houses, Schools, the circulation of the +Scriptures, the aiding Missionary efforts, and other work connected +with the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. + +III. What is to be done under these circumstances? 1. In the days of +the Apostles there would have been more brethren to take the +oversight of so large a body as we are. The Lord has not laid upon us +a burden which is too heavy for us; He is not a hard master. It is +evident that He does not mean us even to attempt to visit all the +saints as much as is absolutely needful, and much less as frequently +as it would be desirable. We mention this, to prevent uncomfortable +feelings on the part of the dear saints under our pastoral care, who +find themselves not as much visited as they used to be when we came +to Bristol, when the number of them was not 70, and now it is about +400, and when in many other respects the work in our hands was not +half so much, as it is now, and when we had much more bodily +strength. 2. it is therefore evident that there are other pastors +needed; not nominal pastors, but such as the Lord has called, to whom +He has given a pastor's heart, and pastoral gifts. 3. Such may be +raised up by the Lord from our own number, or the Lord may send them +from elsewhere. 4. But in the meantime we should at least see whether +there are not helpers among us. 5. As to the work itself, in order +that time may be saved, it appears desirable that the two churches, +Bethesda and Gideon, should be united into one, that the breaking of +bread should be alternately, and that the number of weekly meetings +should be reduced. + +Oct. 21. A few weeks since I had rented a very large and a very cheap +house for the Boys' Orphan-House; but as the persons who lived in +that neighbourhood threatened the landlord with an action, on account +of letting his house for a charitable institution, I, at once, gave +up all claim. That which led me to do so, was the word of the Lord; +"As much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men." I was quite +sure when I gave up the agreement, that the Lord would provide other +premises. On the same morning when this took place, Oct. 5, the Lord, +to show His continued approbation of the work, sent 50l. by a sister, +who is far from being rich, for the furnishing of the Boys' +Orphan-House. Now, today, the Lord has given me another house for the +Orphan-Boys, in the same street, in which the other two Orphan-Houses +are. Thus, in His own time, He has sent help in this particular also. +Indeed in everything, in which I have had to deal with Him alone in +this work, I have never been disappointed. + +Oct. 23. Today two young sisters were received into fellowship who +have been in our Sunday-School. Thus we begin now to reap fruit in +respect of our schools. + +Nov. 1. Our Bible-School and Missionary funds having been for some +time very low, I had been led repeatedly to ask the Lord for a rich +supply, and mentioned several times, though with submission to His +will, the sum of 100l. before Him. However, He seemed not to regard +the prayer respecting the 100l., but gave to us by little and little +what was needed. Yesterday I received a donation of 80l., and today +one of 20l., and thus He has kindly given the 100l. By this means we +are able to increase our stock of Bibles, which has been much reduced +of late. + +Nov. 5. Last night I awoke with a great weakness in my head, which +kept me a good while awake. I at last got to sleep by tying a +handkerchief round my head, and by thus pressing it. Today, however, +though weak, I was able to preach, and that with much enjoyment, +especially in the evening at Bethesda. + +Nov. 6. I feel very weak in my head. This evening it was settled at a +meeting of the two churches, assembling at Bethesda and Gideon +Chapels, that, for the reasons before given, the two churches should +be henceforth united as one. + +Nov. 7. My head is so weak, that I see it absolutely needful to give +up the work for some time. After I had come this morning to the +conclusion to leave Bristol for a while for the purpose of quietness, +I received an anonymous letter from Ireland with 5l. for my own +personal expenses, and thus the Lord has kindly supplied me with the +means for doing so.--I can work no longer, my head being in such a +weak stated from continual exertion, so that I feel now comfortable +in going, though scarcely any time could have been, humanly speaking, +more unsuitable. The Orphan-House for the Boys is on the point of +being opened, the labourers therefore are to be introduced into the +work;---most important church matters have been entered upon and are +yet unsettled;---but the Lord knows better, and cares for His work +more than I do or can. Therefore I desire to leave the matter with +Him, and He graciously helps me to do so, and thus, in the quiet +submission to His will, and the willingness to leave the work in His +own hands, I have the testimony that I have not been engaged in my +own work but in His. + +Nov. 8. This morning I left Bristol. When I left my house, I knew not +what place to go to. All I knew was, that I must leave Bristol. A +Bath coach was the first one I could get, and I took it. My intention +was, not to go to brethren, as I needed perfect quietness; but I felt +so uncomfortable at the hotel, on account of the worldliness of the +place, that I went to see a brother, who with his aunts kindly +pressed me to stay with them.--This evening has been a very trying +season to me. My head has been very weak; I have greatly feared lest +I should become insane; but amidst it all, through grace, my soul is +quietly resting upon the Lord. + +Nov. 12. Lord's day. I am still staying in Bath. The weakness of my +head allowed me to attend but one meeting, and even that distressed +my head much. + +Nov. 13. I was greatly distressed this evening on account of my head. +I prayed earnestly to be kept from insanity. + +Nov. 14. I am rather better in my head today. + +Nov. 15. I left Bath, and went back to Bristol, as I felt I needed +more quietness than I can have in the house of any friends, being +continually drawn into conversation, which my head cannot bear. + +Nov. 16. Today I went to Weston Super Mare, to take lodgings for +myself and family. A sister sent me this morning 5l., by which the +Lord has provided me with the means for removing my family. + +Nov. 17. Weston Super Mare. This evening my wife and child, and our +servant arrived here. Yesterday a sister secretly put two sovereigns +in my wife's pocket book. How kind is the Lord in thus providing us +with means according to our need! How kind also in having just now +sent brother T. to take the work arising from the Schools, +Orphan-Houses, &c., just as brother C--r was sent two years ago, +shortly before I was completely laid aside!---Today a brother sent me +information, that he had ordered one hundred pairs of blankets to be +sent to me, for distribution among the poor. + +Nov. 23. My general health is pretty good; my head, however, is no +better, but rather worse. This evening I was led, through the +affliction in my head, to great irritability of temper. Of late I +have had afresh painfully to experience in myself two things: 1. that +affliction in itself does not lead nearer to God. 2. That we may have +a good deal of leisure time and yet fail in profitably improving it. +Often had I wished within the last months that I might have more +time. Now the Lord has given it to me, but alas! how little of it is +improved for prayer. I find it a difficult thing, whilst caring for +the body, not to neglect the soul. It seems to me much easier to go +on altogether regardless of the body, in the service of the Lord, +than to take care of the body, in the time of sickness, and not to +neglect the soul, especially in an affliction like my present one, +when the head allows but little reading or thinking.---What a blessed +prospect to be delivered from this wretched evil nature! I can say +nothing respecting this day, and this evening in particular, but that +I am a wretched man. + +Nov. 24. I am now quite sure that I want more than mere quiet and +change of air, even medical advice. My general health seems improved +through my stay at Weston, but the disease in my head is increased. I +have had many distressing moments since I have been at Weston, on +account of fearing that my disease may be the forerunner of insanity; +yet God has in mercy sustained me, and enabled me, in some small +measure, notwithstanding my great sinfulness, to realize the blessing +of being in Christ, and therefore secure for ever. + +Nov. 25. We returned to Bristol. I was at peace, being able to cast +myself upon the Lord respecting the calamity which I feared. This +evening I saw a kind physician and surgeon, who told me that the +disease is either a tendency of blood to the head, or that the nerves +of the head are in a disordered state. They also told me that I had +not the least reason to fear insanity. How little grateful is my soul +for this! + +Nov. 29. I am no better. A sister sent me today 5l. also a pickled +tongue, fowls, cakes, and beautiful grapes were sent to me. My cup, +as to temporal mercies, runs over.---One of the Orphan children died +while I was at Weston Super Mare. There is reason to believe that she +died in the faith. + +Nov. 30. I am not any better. I have written to my father, perhaps, +for the last time. All is well, all will be well, all cannot but be +well; because I am in Christ. How precious that now, in this my +sickness, I have not to seek after the Lord, but have already found +Him. + +Dec. 1. By the mercy of God my head is somewhat relieved. My liver is +in a most inactive state, which, as my kind medical attendants tell +me, has created the pressure on the top of the head, and through the +inactivity of the liver, the whole system having been weakened, and +my mental exertions having been continued, the nerves of the head +have greatly suffered in consequence.---This evening was sent to me, +anonymously, from a distance, 5l. for my own present necessities. The +letter was only signed F. W.---A sister, a stranger, gave to my wife +1l. Thus the Lord remembers our increased expenditure in consequence +of my affliction, and sends to us accordingly. + +Dec. 4. Yesterday I met with the brethren for the breaking of bread. +Today I am not so well. Every time that I meet with them, the nerves +of my head are excited, and I am worse afterwards. A sister from +Barnstaple sent us 1l. l5s. + +Dec. 8. My head is not so well as at the end of last week. I find it +difficult to be in Bristol and not to exert my mind. Prayer and the +reading of the Word I can bear better than any thing. May the Lord +give me grace to pray more! I see as yet scarcely a single reason, so +far as I myself am concerned, why the Lord should remove this +affliction from me. I do not find myself more conformed to the mind +of Jesus by it. + +Dec. 9. Two years ago this day, I stated my intention of establishing +an Orphan-House, if God should permit. What has God wrought since! 75 +orphans are now under our care, and 21 more we can receive. Several +more are daily expected. During the last twelvemonth the expenses +have been about 740l., and the income about 840l. In addition to +this, about 400l. has been expended upon the Schools, the circulation +of the Scriptures, and in aiding Missionary purposes. More than +1100l. therefore we have needed during the past year, and our good +Lord has supplied all, without one single person having been asked +for any thing. + +Dec. 12. Today the hundred pairs of blankets arrived. How kind of the +Lord to give us the privilege of being instrumental in providing, in +this respect, for some of the poor, both among the saints and in the +world! This donation came in most seasonably, as, on inquiring into +the circumstances of some of the poor, most affecting cases of +distress were discovered, on account of the want of blankets. May the +Lord give me grace to deny myself, in order to provide for the +necessities of the poor! How much may be done even by a little +self-denial! Lord, help me!---The blankets were of a very good +quality. It is a Christlike spirit in supplying the necessities of +the poor, not to ask how little will do for them, but how richly may +I possibly supply their need. + +Dec. 14. A sister, who a short time since had given me 5l. for my own +personal expenses, gave me another 5l. today. How very kind is the +Lord in providing so abundantly for us, and giving us far more than +we need! + +Dec. 16. My head is not at all better, but rather worse. My medical +attendants have today changed the medicine. But however kind and +skillful they are, however nourishing the food which I take, however +much I seek to refrain from over-exertion, and however much I take +exercise in the air:---till Thou, my great Physician, Thou, Creator of +the Universe, Lord Jesus, dost restore me, I shall be laid aside!---I +have been working a little during the last fortnight, but only a +little. + +Dec. 17.---Lord's day. This morning I saw the 32 orphan girls, who are +above seven years old, pass under my window, to go to the chapel. +When I saw these dear children in their clean dresses, and their +comfortable warm cloaks; and when I saw them walking orderly under +the care of a sister to the chapel; I felt grateful to God that I had +been made the instrument of providing for them, seeing that they are +all better off, both as it regards temporal and spiritual things, +than if they were at the places from whence they were taken. I felt, +that, to bring about such a sight, was worth the labour not only of +many days, but of many months, or years. I felt that it answered all +the arguments of some of my friends who say "you do too much." + +Dec. 24. This is the seventh Lord's day that I have been laid +aside.---This day I determine, by the help of God, no more to send +letters in parcels, because I now clearly see that it is against the +laws of the country, and it becomes me, as a disciple of Jesus, in +every respect to submit myself to the Government, in so far as I am +not called upon to do any thing contrary to the word of God. + +Dec. 26. Today the same brother who sent me the hundred pairs of +blankets, sent me 100l. to purchase as many more blankets as I can +satisfactorily distribute. + +Dec. 29. Applications for the admission of orphans become more and +more numerous. Almost daily fresh cases are brought before us. There +are already as many applications for Orphan-Girls above seven years +as would fill another house. There are also many more Infant-Orphans +applied for than we can take in. Truly this is a large field of +labour! + +Dec. 31. This is the eighth Lord's day since I have been kept from +ministering in the Word, nor did I think it well, on account of my +head, to go to any of the meetings today. Whether I am really getting +better I know not, yet I hope I am. My head is yet much affected, +though my liver seems somewhat more active.---This morning I greatly +dishonoured the Lord by irritability, manifested towards my dear +wife, and that almost immediately after I had been on my knees before +God, praising Him for having given me such a wife. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1837. + + + +I. There are now 81 children in the three Orphan-Houses, and nine +brethren and sisters who have the care of them. Ninety, therefore, +daily sit down to table. Lord look on the necessities of Thy servant! + +II. The schools require as much help as before; nay, more, +particularly the Sunday School, in which there are at present about +320 children, and in the Day Schools about 350.---Lord, Thy servant is +a poor man; but he has trusted in Thee, and made his boast in Thee, +before the sons of men; therefore let him not be confounded! Let it +not be said, all this is enthusiasm, and therefore it is come to +nought. + +III. My temporal supplies have been:--- + +1. By the Freewill Offerings through the boxes L149 18s. 6 1/2d. + +2. By Presents in money, from believers in and out of Bristol L77 4s. +0d. + +3. By Presents in clothes, provisions, &c., which were worth to us at +least L25 0s. 0d. + +4. By Money through family connexion L45 0s. 0d. + +5. We have been living half free of rent, whereby we have saved at +least L10 0s. 0d. + +Altogether L307 2s. 6 1/2d. + + + +I have purposely given here again, as at the close of the former +years, a statement of the supplies which the Lord has been pleased to +send me during this year, because I delight in showing, both to the +world and to the church, how kind a Master I have served even as to +temporal blessings, and how so plainly in my ease the Lord has +displayed the truth of that word "Whosoever believeth on Him shall +not be confounded," not merely by providing the means for His work in +my hands, but also by providing for the necessities of myself and +family. + + + +January 1, 1838. Through the good hand of our God upon me, I have +been brought to the beginning of an other year. May He in mercy grant +that it may be spent more in His service than any previous year! May +I, through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, be more conformed to +the image of His Son, than has been the case hitherto!---Last night +the brethren had a prayer meeting at Gideon, after the preaching was +over, and continued till half-past twelve in prayer; but I was unable +to be present. + +Jan. 2. During the last night thieves broke into our house, and into +the school-room of Gideon Chapel. Being stopped by a second strong +door, in my house, or rather being prevented from going any further +by our loving Father, who did not allow the hedge which He has set +round about us, at this time, to be broken through, nothing was +missing, except some cold meat, which they took out of the +house.---They broke open several boxes in Gideon school-room, but took +nothing. They left some of the bones, the meat being cut off, in one +of the boxes in Gideon school-room, and hung up another in a tree in +our garden. So depraved is man naturally when left to himself, that +he not only steals his fellowman's property, but also makes sport of +the sin! How merciful that God has protected us! My mind was peaceful +when I heard the news this morning, thanking God from my heart for +preservation, and considering it as an answer to prayer, which had +been many times put up to Him, during these last years, respecting +thieves. + +Jan. 6. I feel very little better in my head, though my general +health seems improved; but my kind physician says I am much better, +and advises me now change of air. I am most reluctant to go, though +on two former occasions when I used change of air, in August 1829 at +Exmouth, and in 1835 at Niton in the Isle of Wight, the Lord +abundantly blessed me in doing so, both bodily and spiritually. This +evening a sister who resides about fifty miles from hence, and who is +therefore quite unacquainted with the medical advice given to me this +morning, sent me 15l. for the express purpose of change of air, and +wrote that she felt assured, from having been similarly afflicted, +that nothing would do me so much good, humanly speaking, as quiet and +change of air. How wonderfully does God work! I have thus the means +of carrying into effect my physician's advice.---Today I heard of a +most remarkable case of conversion through the instrumentality of my +Narrative. + +Jan. 7. This is the ninth Lord's day that I have been kept from +ministering in the Word. My head is in a distressing state, and, as +far as I can judge, as bad as ever. It seems to me more and more +clear that the nerves are affected. My affliction is connected with a +great tendency to irritability of temper; yea, with some satanic +feeling, foreign to me even naturally. O Lord, mercifully keep Thy +servant from openly dishonouring Thy name! Rather take me soon home +to Thyself! + +Jan. 10. Today I went with my family to Trowbridge. + +Jan. 12. Trowbridge. This evening I commenced reading Whitfield's +life, written by Mr. Philip. + +Jan. 13. I have already received blessings through Whitfield's life. +His great success in preaching the Gospel is evidently to be +ascribed, instrumentally, to his great prayerfulness, and his reading +the Bible on his knees. I have known the importance of this for +years; I have practiced it a little, but far too little. I have had +more communion with God today than I have had, at least generally, +for some time past. + +Jan. 14. Lord's day. I have, continued reading Whitfield's life. God +has again blessed it to my soul. I have spent several hours in prayer +today, and read on my knees, and prayed for two hours over Psalm +lxiii. God has blessed my soul much today. I have been fighting +together with the armies of Jesus, though this is the tenth Lord's +day since I have been kept from preaching, and though I have not +assembled with the brethren here, on account of my head. My soul is +now brought into that state, that I delight myself in the will of +God, as it regards my health. Yea, I can now say, from my heart, I +would not have this disease removed till God, through it, has +bestowed the blessing for which it was sent. He has drawn out my soul +much yesterday and today. Lord, continue Thy goodness, and fill me +with love! I long, more fully to glorify God; not so much by outward +activity, as by inward conformity to the image of Jesus. What hinders +God, to make of one, so vile as I am, another Whitfield? Surely, God +could bestow as much grace upon me, as He did upon him. O, my Lord, +draw me closer and closer to Thyself, that I may run after Thee!---I +desire, if God should restore me again for the ministry of the Word +(and this I believe He will do soon, judging from the state in which +He has now brought my soul, though I have been worse in health the +last eight days, than for several weeks previously), that my +preaching may be more than ever the result of earnest prayer and much +meditation, and that I may so walk with God, that "out of my belly +may flow rivers of living water." But alas! if the grace of God +prevent not, one day more, and the rich blessings, which He has +bestowed upon my soul yesterday and today, will all vanish; but +again, if He favours me (and oh! may He do it), I shall go from +strength to strength, and I and the saints in Bristol shall have +abundant reason to praise God for this my illness. + +Jan. 15. I have had since yesterday afternoon less suffering in my +head than for the last eight days! though it is even now far from +being well. I have still an inward assurance, on account of the +spiritual blessings which the Lord has granted to me, that through +this affliction He is only purifying me for His blessed service, and +that I shall be soon restored to the work.---Today, also, God has +continued to me fervency of spirit, which I have now enjoyed for +three days following. He has today, also, drawn out my soul into much +real communion with Himself, and into holy desires to be more +conformed to His dear Son. When God gives a spirit of prayer, how +easy then to pray! Nevertheless it was given to me in the use of the +means, as I fell on my knees last Saturday, to read His Word with +meditation, and to turn it into prayer. Today I spent about three +hours in prayer over Ps. lxiv. and lxv. In reference to that precious +word! "O thou that hearest prayer," (Ps. lxv. 2.) I asked the Lord +the following petitions, and entreated Him to record them in heaven +and to answer them. + +1. That He would give me grace to glorify Him by a submissive and +patient spirit under my affliction. + +2. That, as I was enabled now, and only now from my heart, to praise +God for this affliction, He would not remove His hand from me, until +He had qualified me for His work more than I have been hitherto. + +3. That He would be pleased to grant, that the work of conversion, +through the instrumentality of brother Craik and myself, might not +cease, but go on as much now as when we first came to Bristol, yea, +more abundantly than even then. + +4. That He would be pleased to give more real spiritual prosperity to +the church under our care, than ever we have as yet enjoyed. + +5. Having praised Him for the sale of so many copies of my Narrative +in so short a time, I entreated Him to cause every copy to be +disposed of. + +6. I asked Him to continue to let His rich blessing rest upon this +little work, and more abundantly, so that many may be converted +through it, and many of the children of God truly benefited by it; +and that thus I might now be speaking through it, though laid aside +from active service. + +7. I asked Him for His blessing, in the way of conversion, to rest +upon the Orphans, and upon the Sunday and Day-School children under +our care. + +8. I asked Him for means to carry on these Institutions, and to +enlarge them. + +These are some of the petitions which I have asked of my God this +evening in connexion with this His own word. I believe He has heard +me. I believe He will make it manifest, in His own good time, that He +has heard me; and I have recorded these my petitions this 14th day of +January, 1838, that, when God has answered them, He may get, through +this, glory to His name.---[Whilst writing this second part, I add to +the praise of the Lord, and for the encouragement of the children of +God, that petitions 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8, have been fully answered, and +the other petitions, likewise, in part.] + +Jan. 16, Tuesday. A blessed day. How very good is the Lord! Fervency +of spirit, through His grace, is continued to me, though this +morning, but for the help of God, I should have lost it again. The +weather has been very cold for several days; but today I suffered +much, either because it was colder than before, or because I felt it +more, owing to the weakness of my body, and having taken so much +medicine. I arose from my knees, and stirred the fire; but I still +remained very cold. I was a little irritated by this. I moved to +another part of the room, but felt the cold still more. At last, +having prayed for some time, I was obliged to rise up, and take a +walk to promote circulation. I now entreated the Lord on my walk, +that this circumstance might not be permitted to rob me of the +precious communion which I have had with Him the last three days; for +this was the object at which Satan aimed. I confessed also my sin of +irritability on account of the cold, and sought to have my conscience +cleansed through the blood of Jesus. He had mercy upon me, my peace +was restored; and when I returned I sought the Lord again in prayer, +and had uninterrupted communion with Him. [I have purposely mentioned +the above circumstance, in detail, in order to show, how the most +trivial causes may operate in suddenly robbing one of the enjoyment +of most blessed communion with God.] I have been enabled to pray for +several hours this day. The subject of my meditation has been Psalm +lxvi.--Verses 10, 11, and 12, are particularly applicable to my +present circumstances. God has already, through the instrumentality +of this my affliction, brought me into a "wealthy place," and I +believe He will bless my soul yet more and more.---I do not remember +any time, when I have had more fervency of spirit in connexion with +such a desire to overcome every thing that is hateful in the sight of +God, and with such an earnestness to be fully conformed to the image +of Jesus. Truly, I have reason to apply to myself verse 16, and "tell +what God has done for my soul."--Verse 18 also I can take to myself. +I do not regard iniquity in my heart, but it is upright before Him, +through His grace, and therefore God does hear my prayers.--What has +God done for me, in comparing this 16th of January 1838 with the 16th +of January 1820, the day on which my dear mother died.--I have also +resolved this day, if the Lord should restore me again, to have an +especial meeting at the chapel once a week, or once a fortnight, with +the Orphan and Day-School children, for the purpose of reading the +Scriptures with them.---My heart has been drawn out in prayer for many +things, especially that the Lord would create in me a holy +earnestness to win souls, and a greater compassion for ruined +sinners. For this I have been quickened through reading onward in +Whitfield's life. + +Jan. 17. The Lord is yet merciful to me. I enjoy fervency of spirit. +My soul has been again repeatedly led out in prayer this day, and +that for a considerable time.--I have read on my knees, with prayer +and meditation, Psalm lxviii.--Verse 5 "A Father of the fatherless," +one of the titles of Jehovah, has been an especial blessing to me, +with reference to the Orphans. The truth, which is contained in this, +I never realized so much as today. By the help of God, this shall be +my argument before Him, respecting the Orphans, in the hour of need. +He is their Father, and therefore has pledged Himself, as it were, to +provide for them, and to care for them; and I have only to remind Him +of the need of these poor children, in order to have it supplied. My +soul is still more enlarged respecting Orphans. This word "a Father +of the fatherless," contains enough encouragement to cast thousands +of Orphans, with all their need, upon the loving heart of God.--My +head has been again in a distressing state today; my soul, however, +is in peace. May God in mercy continue to me fervency of spirit! + +January 18 to February 2. During this time I continued still at +Trowbridge. I was, on the whole, very happy, and habitually at peace, +and had repeatedly much communion with God; but still I had not the +same earnestness in prayer, nor did I, in other respects, enjoy the +same degree of fervency of spirit, with which the Lord had favoured +me for several days previous to this period.While the considerable +degree of fervency of spirit, which I had had, was altogether the +gift of God, still I have to ascribe to myself the loss of it. It is +remarkable, that the same book, Whitfield's Life, which was +instrumental in stirring me up to seek after such a frame of heart, +was also instrumental in depriving me of it, in some measure, +afterwards. I once or twice read that book when I ought to have read +the Bible on my knees, and thus was robbed of a blessing. +Nevertheless, on the whole, even this period was a good season.--My +health being not at all improved, it seemed best that I should give +up all medicine for a while, and take a tour; on which account I left +Trowbridge today and went to Bath, with the object of going from +thence to Oxford. I had grace today to confess the Lord Jesus on my +way from Trowbridge to Bath, as also twice, lately, in going from +Trowbridge to Bristol; but I was also twice silent. Oh that my heart +may be filled with the love of Jesus, in order that it maybe filled +with love for perishing sinners! + +Feb. 3. I left Bath this morning, and arrived in the evening at +Oxford, where I was very kindly received by brother and sister ----, +and the sisters ----. + +Feb. 7. Oxford. I had been praying repeatedly yesterday and the day +before, that the Lord would be pleased to guide me, whether I should +leave this place or not; but could not see it clearly to be His will +that I should do so, and therefore determined to stay. Now, as I am +able to have a quiet horse, I shall try horse exercise, if it may +please the Lord to bless that to the benefit of my health. + +Feb. 10. I have had horse exercise for the last three days, but the +horse is now ill. "Mine hour is not yet come," is the Lord's voice to +me in this little circumstance. + +Feb. 11. This morning I was directed to read Proverbs iii. 5-12, +having just a few minutes to fill up before breakfast. I was +particularly struck with those words: "Neither be weary of His +correction." I have not been allowed to despise the chastening of the +Lord, but I begin, now and then, to feel somewhat weary of His +correction. O Lord, have mercy upon Thy poor unworthy servant! Thou +knowest, that, after the inner man, I desire patiently to bear this +affliction, and not to have it removed till it has done its work in +me, and yielded the peaceable fruits of righteousness. But Thou +knowest also what a trial it is to me to continue the life I am now +living. Help, Lord, according to my need! + +On Feb. 8th I sent a letter to the church in Bristol, which, having +been preserved, I give here in print, as it shows the way in which +the Lord dealt with me during and through the instrumentality of the +affliction, and which, with His blessing, may lead one or other of +the children of God who are in trial, quietly to wait for the end, +and to look out for blessings to be bestowed upon them through the +instrumentality of the trial. + + + +To the Saints, united together in Fellowship, and assembling at +Bethesda and Gideon Chapels, Bristol. + + + +Trowbridge, Feb. 1, 1838. + +Dear Brethren, + +Twelve weeks have passed away, since I last ministered among you. I +should have written to you repeatedly, during that period, had I not +thought it better to put aside every mental occupation which could be +deferred, as my head is unfit for mental exertion; but I would now +rather write a few lines, than appear unmindful of you. You are dear +to me; yea, so dear, that I desire to live and die with you, if our +Lord permit; and why should I not tell you so by letter? I will +write, then, as a token of brotherly remembrance and of love towards +you; and may it be a means of quickening you to prayer on my behalf. + +In looking back upon my past life, I know not where to begin, and +where to end, in making mention of the Lord's mercies. His +long-suffering towards me in the days of my unregeneracy cannot be +described. You know a little of my sinful life, before I was brought +to the Lord; still you know but very little. If, however, I have much +reason to praise God for His mercies towards me in those days, I have +more abundant reason to admire His gentleness, long-suffering, and +faithfulness towards me since I have known Him. He has step by step +led me on, and He has not broken the bruised reed. His gentleness +towards me has been great indeed, very great. (Brethren, let us +follow God, in dealing gently with each other!) He has borne with my +coldness, half-heartedness, and backsliding. In the midst of it all, +He has treated me as His child. How can I sufficiently praise Him for +this long-suffering? (Brethren, let us imitate our Father, let us +bear long, and suffer long with each other!) He has been always the +same gracious, kind, loving Father, Friend, Supporter, Teacher, +Comforter, and all in all to me, as He was at the beginning. No +variableness has been found in Him towards me, though I have again +and again provoked Him. I say this to my shame. (Brethren, let us +seek to be faithful, in the Lord, towards each other! Let us seek to +love each other in the truth, and for the truth's sake, without +variableness! It is easy, comparatively, to begin to love; but it +requires much watchfulness, not to grow weary in love, when little or +no love is returned; yea, when we are unkindly treated, instead of +being loved. But as our gracious, faithful God, notwithstanding all +our variableness, loves us without change, so should we, His +children, love each other. Lord, help us so to do!) + +Besides this gentleness, long-suffering, and faithfulness, which the +Lord has manifested towards me, and which I have experienced in +common with you all, the Lord has bestowed upon me peculiar blessings +and privileges. One of the chief is, that He has condescended to call +me for the ministry of His word. How can I praise Him sufficiently +for this! One who was such a sinner, such a servant of Satan, so fit +for hell, so deserving of everlasting destruction, was not merely +cleansed from sin and made a child of God through faith in the Lord +Jesus, and thus fitted for heaven, and did not merely receive the +sure promise that he should have eternal glory; but was also called +unto, and, in a measure, qualified for the expounding of the word of +God. I magnify Him for this honour!---But more than this. More than +eleven years, with very little interruption, have I been allowed, +more or less, to preach the Word. My soul does magnify the Lord for +this! More still. The Lord has condescended to use me as an +instrument in converting many sinners, and, in a measure at least, in +benefiting many of His children. For this honour I do now praise God, +and shall praise Him not merely as long as I live, but as long as I +have a being. But I do not stop here. I have many other reasons to +speak well of the Lord, but I would only mention one. It is my +present affliction. Yes, my present affliction is among the many +things, for which I have very much reason to praise God; and I do +praise Him for it. Before you, before the whole church of Christ, and +before the world would I confess that God has dealt in very kindness +towards me in this affliction. I own, I have not borne it without +impatience and fretfulness; I own, I have been several times overcome +by irritability of temper on account of it; but nevertheless, after +the inner man, I praise God for the affliction, and I do desire from +my heart, that it may truly benefit me, and that it may not be +removed till the end has been answered, for which it has been sent. +God has blessed me in this trial, and is still blessing me.--As I know +you love me, (unworthy as I am of it), and feel interested about me, +I mention a few of the many mercies with which God has favoured me +during these twelve weeks. 1. At the commencement of my illness, when +my head was affected in a manner quite new to me, and when thus it +continued day after day, I feared lest I should lose my reason.--This +created more real internal suffering than ever I had known before. +But our gracious Lord supported me. His precious gospel was full of +comfort to me. All, all will be well, was invariably the conclusion, +the conclusion grounded upon Scripture, to which I came; yea, all +will be well with me eternally, though the heaviest of all earthly +trials should coins upon me, even that of dying in a state of +insanity.--I was once near death, as I then thought, nearly nine years +ago: I was full of comfort at that time; but to be comfortable,--to +be able quietly to repose upon God, with the prospect of an +affliction before one, such as I have now mentioned,--is more than to +be comfortable in the prospect of death, at least for a +believer.--Now, is it not well to be afflicted, in order to obtain +such an experience? And have I not reason, therefore, to thank God +for this affliction? + + + +Oxford, Feb. 6, 1838. + +When I began to write the foregoing lines, beloved brethren, I +intended to write but very briefly; but as I love you, and as I have +abundant reason to magnify the Lord, my pen ran on, till my head +would follow no longer.--I go on now to mention some other mercies +which the Lord has bestowed upon me, through my present affliction. + +2. Through being deprived for so long a time of the privilege of +preaching the Word to sinners and saints, the Lord has been pleased +to create in me a longing for this blessed work, and to give me at +the same time to feel the importance of it, in a degree in which I +never had experienced it before. Thus the Lord has fitted me somewhat +more for His work, by laying me aside from it. Good therefore is the +Lord, and kind indeed, in disabling me from preaching. Great has been +my trial, after the self-willed old nature, not to be able to preach; +and long ere this, unfit as I was for it, I should have resumed the +work, had I followed my own will; but hitherto have I considered it +most for the glory of God, quietly to refrain from outward service, +in order to glorify Him by patient submission, till my Lord shall be +pleased to condescend to call His servant forth again for active +engagements. And then, I know, He will give me grace, cheerfully to +go back to the delightful service of pointing sinners to the Lamb of +God, and of feeding the church. + +3. Through this affliction I have known experimentally in a higher +degree than I knew it before, how, if obliged to refrain from active +service, one can nevertheless as really and truly help the armies of +Jesus, through secret prayer, as if one were actively engaged in the +proclamation of the truth.--This point brings to my mind a truth, of +which we all need to be reminded frequently, even this, that at all +times, and under all circumstances, we may really and truly serve the +Lord, and fight for His kingdom, by seeking to manifest His mind, and +by giving ourselves to prayer. + +4. Through the instrumentality of this affliction the Lord has been +pleased to show me, how I may lay out myself more fully for His +service in the proclamation of His truth; and, by His grace, if ever +restored for active service, I purpose to practice what He has shown +me. + +5. Through being deprived so much from meeting with the brethren as I +have been these thirteen weeks, I have learned somewhat more to value +this privilege than I did before. For as my head has been much +affected, even through one meeting on the Lord's day, I have seen how +highly I ought to have prized the days, when twice or thrice I could +meet with the saints, without suffering from it.--Bear with me, +brethren, when I beseech you, highly to esteem the opportunities of +assembling yourselves together. Precede them with prayer; for only in +as much as you do so, have you a right to expect a blessing from +them. Seek to treasure up, not merely in your memory, but in your +heart, the truths which you hear; for soon you may be deprived of +these privileges, and soon you may be called upon to practice what +you hear. Brethren, let us not learn the greatness of our privileges, +by being deprived of them.-- + +I also delight in mentioning some of the particulars in which the +Lord's kindness to me has appeared in this affliction, and whereby He +has shown, that He does not lay more on us, than is absolutely +needful. + +1. You know, that since May, 1836, I was able to walk but little. +This infirmity the Lord entirely removed, just before I became +afflicted in my head. This was exceedingly kind; for air and exercise +are the only means, which almost immediately relieve my head. How +much greater would have been the affliction, had I not been able to +walk about in the air!---Truly, "He stayeth His rough wind, in the day +of His east wind." I delight in pointing out the gentleness of the +stroke. + +Oxford, Feb. 7, 1838. + +2. The Lord might have chosen to confine me to my bed, and kept me +there in much pain these thirteen weeks, for the sake of teaching me +the lessons which He purposes me to learn through this affliction; +instead of this, the pain in my head has been so slight, that it +would not be worth mentioning, were it not connected with a weakness +of the mental faculties, which allows of but little exertion. + +3. Further, it might have pleased the Lord to incapacitate me +altogether for active service, but instead of this, He has still +allowed me, in some small measure, to help by my judgment in some +church matters, to write some letters in His service, to speak now +and then a word to believers for the furtherance of their faith, and +to confess His name repeatedly before unconverted persons, with whom +I have met on my journeys. Besides all this, I have had strength for +other work connected with the kingdom of Jesus Christ. + +4. In one other point the Lord has been especially gracious to me, in +that, while I have been unable to preach, unable to write or read +much, or even to converse for any length of time with the brethren, +He has allowed me always sufficient strength for as much secret +prayer as I desired. Even praying with others has been often trying +to my head; but prayer in secret has not only never tried my head, +but has been habitually (I mean the act of prayer) a relief to my +head. Oh! how can I sufficiently praise God for this. How +comparatively slight are any trials to a child of God, as long as +under them he is enabled to converse freely with his Father! And so +sweet has been this communion with my Father, a few times, and so +have I been enabled to pour out my heart before Him, that whilst +those favoured seasons have lasted, I not only felt the affliction to +be no affliction, and could call it, from my heart, sweet affliction; +but I was almost unwilling soon to go back to the multiplicity of +engagements in Bristol, lest I should not have leisure to continue so +much in prayer, meditation, and the study of His word. Shall I not +then praise my Father for such dealings with me? Do I not even now +see this affliction working for my good? I say, therefore, after the +inward man: Father, continue Thy hand upon me, as long as it shall +seem good in Thy sight, only bless my soul!---But, brethren, do not +mistake me, as if I meant that I prayed habitually with much +earnestness. O no! I pray a little habitually, I pray now and then +much; but I pray by no means as much as my strength and present time +allow me. Therefore ask God on my behalf, that grace may be given me, +habitually to pray much; and you will surely be profited by it.--But I +could not help alluding to this point, as the Lord's kindness is so +particularly seen in this matter. + +5. Lastly, I cannot omit mentioning the kindness of the Lord, in +opening the houses of some of His children at Bath, Trowbridge, and +Oxford for me, during this my affliction. These dear saints have +shown me much kindness. But while I would be grateful to them for it, +I discern the hand of God in influencing their hearts. Moreover, I +have had kind medical attendants. And you, my dear brethren, though I +have been unable to minister among you, have continued to supply my +temporal wants, for which I thank you, and in all of which I see the +gracious, loving hand of my Father, who through all this, as by a +voice from heaven, tells me: "My child, even bodily health and +strength would I give, were it good for thee." I therefore desire to +wait for the good pleasure of my God concerning this point. + +Your love will naturally ask, how I now am in body. My disease, as my +kind medical friends tell me, is an inactive liver, which causes the +pain in the head, and the inability of exerting my mind for any +length of time. In addition to this, the nerves of the head seem to +have suffered through over-exertion. As medicine had been tried for +about ten weeks, and had not given relief, it appeared well, that I +should give it up for a time, and simply travel about for the benefit +of the air. My own experience teaches me, that this means is +beneficial; for it gives almost immediate relief. In consequence of +this, I left Trowbridge last Friday, and arrived on Saturday evening +at Oxford, where I am staying with dear brother and sister B. I have +here all that brotherly love can do for me, and am in every way +comfortable. It is now a week since I have given up medicine, and I +am at least not worse, if not better; but I think I am a little +better. I wait on the Lord to show me His will, as to the place to +which I should go next. + +As to my inner man, I am in peace, generally in peace, and long for +more conformity to the mind of Christ. My chief desire is, that if it +shall ever please the Lord to restore me again, to be sent back to +active service with increased humility, greater earnestness in the +work, greater love for perishing sinners, and a heart habitually +influenced by the truths which I preach.--Whether I shall ever be +restored for the work, I cannot say with certainty; but, if I may +judge from the Lord's dealings with me in former times, I have reason +to believe, that I shall yet be allowed to labour again. + +In conclusion, dear brethren, pray for my dear brother and +fellow-labourer. Esteem him highly in the Lord; for He is worthy of +all honour.---I would write more, for I have much more to speak of; but +as I purpose, if God allows me the pleasure, to write again soon, I +leave it till then. Farewell. + +Your affectionate brother and servant in the Lord, + +GEORGE MULLER. + + + +Feb. 13. These ten days I have been staying in Oxford, though I came +only for one or two; but I have stayed to see the Lord's hand leading +me away from hence. I have now been led to decide on going to +Lutterworth to see brother---, to converse with him about accompanying +him on a journey to the Continent, with reference to Missionary +objects. When I had come to this decision, I took another ride, the +horse being well again; but now this formerly quiet horse was +self-willed and shy, which does not at all suit me in the weak state +of my nervous system. As horse exercise had kept me here longer than +I had intended to stay, and as I cannot now ride on this horse which +before suited me so well, I see, even in this, in itself, trifling +circumstance, a confirmation that I had been right in my decision to +leave Oxford. + +Feb. 16. Lutterworth. I arrived here on the evening of the 14th. I +have been decidedly worse since I have been here, and was obliged +again to have recourse to medicine. A brother having strongly +recommended me, whilst in Oxford, to go to Leamington on account of +my health, and having at the same time offered to pay my expenses +during my stay there, and being now so very unwell again, and so near +Leamington, I decided to-night upon accepting his kindness, provided +that my kind physician in Bristol had no objection. + +Feb. 17. Leamington. I left Lutterworth this morning, where I have +received much kindness. There was no inside place, and I was very +unwell; but the fear of being quite laid up at Lutterworth, and +becoming burthensome to those dear saints who had received me into +their house though a stranger to them; and having still no desirable +medical advice; and the remembrance that the Lord had graciously +enabled me, even lately, to travel outside in cold weather; induced +me to get on the coach, and I rode off in a heavy fall of snow. But +God had mercy. After eight miles ride, at Rugby, I obtained an inside +place. The rest of the way was crowned with mercies. I had a room to +myself at Southam, found a suitable dinner just ready, had an inside +place to Leamington, and was preserved by the way, though the +coachman was quite intoxicated, and drove furiously.--I had asked the +Lord to let me find a suitable and cheap lodging at Leamington, and +the first lodging I saw I took, for which I pay only ten shillings +weekly. Thus, a few minutes after my arrival, I sat comfortably at my +own fireside. How very kind of the Lord! + +Feb. 26. Yesterday and today I have suffered again in my head, though +I have been on the whole better since I have taken the Leamington +waters. But far more trying has been the internal conflict which I +have had. Grace fought against evil suggestions of one kind and +another, and prevailed; but it was a very trying season. This was +much increased by receiving neither yesterday nor today a letter from +my dear wife. Grace sought out for reasons why she had not written; +nevertheless it was a very trying season. Today I earnestly prayed to +God to send my wife to me, as I feel that by being alone, and +afflicted as I am in my bead, and thus fit for little mental +employment, Satan gets an advantage over me. + +Feb. 27. God has had mercy upon me. The sore and sharp trial, the +very bitter conflict is over.--This morning also I received a letter, +which ought to have come yesterday, and which showed me that my dear +wife had not been remiss in writing. She announced her purpose of +coming today, and God, in mercy to me, brought her safely. + +March 3. My head has been on the whole better these two weeks, than +it has been for several months; but still I am not well. I have +walked every day, for the last thirteen days, between three and four +hours a day, and by the mercy of God am able to do so, without much +fatigue. + +March 11. My health is much the same. I am pretty well, but have no +mental energy.--I have read during the last weeks once more, with as +much or more interest than ever, I. and II. of Samuel, and I. and II. +of Kings.---I have now, after repeated prayer, come to the conclusion, +(if brother Craik, to whom I have written, sees no objection, and if +my physician thinks it would be beneficial to my health,) to +accompany brother--to Germany, that thus; 1, I might aid him by my +advice in reference to the object of his journey; 2, that thus, if +the Lord will, through the journey and the benefit of my native air, +my health might be benefited; and 3, that I might once more have an +opportunity of setting the truth before my father and brother. + +March 12. I feel quite comfortable in the prospect of going to +Germany. I trust it will prove to be as much of God, as it was shown +to have been the last time. + +March 13. I had a letter today from brother Craik, who thinks it +desirable that I should go to Germany, but my physician says that I +should not go for a month or two, for that my mind ought not to be +burdened. I am in peace, and from this I see that the Lord has made +me willing to do His and not my own will. I wrote to brother----the +result of today, and have now left it with him, whether he will wait, +or go on the 21st, as he purposes. + +March 14--20. During these days, as before, I have continued to read +the Scriptures with prayer, i. e. turning what I read into prayer, +chiefly with a reference to myself. My days generally pass away in +peace. It is a trial to me, to have to care so much about my body; +but, on the whole, the Lord gives me grace to submit patiently, yet +not always. Today I saw again my medical adviser, who wishes me to +stay another week. + +March 23, Today I received a letter from brother ----. He is not gone, +and will wait for me. I have increased assurance that I shall go to +Berlin, and have comfort in the thought. + +March 24. A few days ago I had particular comfort in meditating on +the Lord's prayer in Luke (which came in the course of my +meditation), after having been tempted to pass it over, as it had +been the subject of my meditation a short time before.--Within the +last fortnight I have read with meditation and prayer from the 4th to +the 12th chapter of the Gospel by Luke. + +April 2. For some time I have been getting weary of my stay here. +Yesterday I pleaded especially that word Psalm ciii. 13: "Like as a +father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear Him." +I begged God to pity me, and to release me from the necessity of +staying any longer at Leamington, if it might be. Today I saw my +physician, and he has allowed me to leave. Thus the Lord has granted +my request. + +April 3. My dear Mary left for Bristol, and I for London, on my way +to Germany. I was led to read, this morning, Psalm cxxi. with my dear +wife before we separated, which we both felt to be very appropriate +to our circumstances. + +April 6. This evening I went on board the steamer for Hamburg. + +April 7. All the day ill from sea sickness. + +April 8. Lord's day. I was able to get up this morning, and to take +my meals.--Last night I was led to praise God for having made me His +child, considering that I was most likely the only one on board that +knew Him. This morning, however, I found a sister in the Lord among +the passengers, with whom I had much conversation.--At dinner she +manifested more grace, in testifying against evil, than I did. At tea +time I had grace, in some measure, to speak of Jesus before the +company, and to confess Him as my Lord. + +April 9. We arrived at Hamburg about one in the morning, having had a +most favourable passage of about 48 hours, and at seven I went on +shore. It had been repeatedly my prayer, that I might soon find out +brother ----, who had gone three days before me to Hamburg; and +immediately after my arrival, in answer to prayer, without any +difficulty, I found out where he lodged. + +April 14. Berlin. We arrived here the evening before last. Having +been yesterday and this morning seeking for lodgings, without being +able to obtain any that were suitable, I at last became irritated. +Surely there was lack of earnest prayer on my part in this matter, +and want of patience in waiting the Lord's own time, and want of +openness, in not telling brother ---- that I was tired, and that, on +account of my weakness, I was unable thus to go about from place to +place. At last the Lord directed us to two suitable rooms, and I feel +now again comfortable, in my quiet retirement, after having confessed +my sin of irritability to the Lord and to brother ----. + +April 15--21. We met several times during this week with certain +brethren who desire to give themselves to Missionary service, and +prayed and read the Scriptures with them, and made such remarks as +seemed to be important in connexion with the work. In addition to +this we saw the brethren privately at our lodgings, two, three, or +four at a time. But I have still felt the great weakness of my mental +powers, and have been only able to attend to this work about three +hours a day.--Since my arrival here I have had two letters from my +dear Mary. Harriet Culliford, one of the Orphans, and formerly one of +the most unpromising children, has been removed. She died as a true +believer, several of the brethren who saw her being quite satisfied +about her state. Surely this pays for much trouble and for much +expense! My wife also mentions some fresh instances of the Lord's +blessing resting upon my Narrative.--I am now, after prayer, this day, +April 21, quite sure that I should leave Berlin, and go to my father +at once, as the work here is too much for my head. + +April 22nd. Confirmation-day of the children in Berlin. The son of +the person with whom we lodge was confirmed, and in the evening they +had the violin and dancing. How awful!---A few days since I heard +that a brother in the Lord, an old friend of mine, and one of the two +alluded to in the first part of this Narrative, page 15, was in +prison on account of his religious views. This brought afresh before +me the privileges which the children of God enjoy in England.--I saw a +few days since another brother in prison, who, as an unconverted +young man, in the university, was once at a political club, and had +his name enrolled, in consequence of this, in the list of the +political students. Shortly afterwards he was converted, and gave up +all connexion with these political students. He finished his +university course and afterwards became a tutor to the sons of a +baron. In that family he had been for a considerable time, when one +night he was fetched by the police out of his bed and taken to +prison, on the ground of this his connexion with the political club +three or four years before. [The result was that he was for many +months in prison. Now he is a Missionary in the East Indies. I have +related this circumstance to remind the reader afresh, that though +the Lord freely and fully forgives us all our sins at once when we +believe, yet He may allow us to suffer the consequences of them in a +greater or less degree.] + +April 24. Left Berlin last evening for Magdeburg, Had a long +conversation with two deists in the mail. God helped me to make a +full confession of His dear Son, in answer to prayer for grace to be +enabled to do so. This afternoon I arrived at Heimersleben, the small +town where my father lives. Once more then I have met with my dear +aged parent, who is evidently fast hastening to the grave, and seems +to me not likely to live through the next winter. I arrived just at +the time when, the Fair was held in the town. How great, how +exceedingly great, the difference in me, as to my feelings respecting +such things now, from what they were formerly! + +April 25--28. Stay at Heimersleben. The Lord has given me both an +opportunity and grace to speak more fully, more simply, and more to +the heart of my father about the things of God, and in particular +about the plan of salvation, than I had ever done before. I trust +that, in judgment at least, he is convinced that there is something +lacking in him. All the time of my stay here he has been most +affectionate. I spoke also fully again to my poor brother, who is now +completely living in open sin. Oh to grace what a debtor am I!---Brother +Knabe, who was the only believer in Heimersleben, as far as +I have been able to learn, died about eighteen months since. + +April 28. Today I left for Magdeburg. My father accompanied me about +eight miles. Both of us, I think, felt, when about to separate, that +we were parting from each other, never again to meet on earth. How +would it have cheered the separation on both sides, were my dear +father a believer! But it made my heart indeed sad to see him, in all +human probability, for the last time, without having Scriptural +ground for hope respecting his soul.--I arrived in the afternoon at +Magdeburg, and went to a brother, a musician in one of the regiments +of that fortress, who is on the point of leaving the army to go to +the East Indies as a Missionary. In his lodgings I saw another +brother, a private soldier, who lives in the barracks, who told me, +on my enquiring, that he goes into the sand cellar, which is +perfectly dark, in order to obtain opportunity for secret prayer. How +great the privileges of those who may freely have both time and place +for retirement; but how great, at the same time, our obligation to +improve these opportunities!---This evening at eight I went on board +an Elbe-steamer for Hamburg. + +April 30. This morning at seven I arrived at Hamburg. Nothing +particular happened during the passage, except that we stuck fast, in +a shallow part of the river, through the carelessness of one of the +sailors; but the Lord heard prayer, and after a little while the +steamer could ply again. + +May 1. Yesterday and today I spent in an hotel at Hamburg in writing +letters. I had also, though staying at an hotel, much real communion +with God in reading the Scriptures and in prayer. This evening I +embarked for London. + +May 4. London. Left Hamburg on the 2nd. Had a fine passage. I have, +by the mercy of God, been kept from light and trifling conversation; +but I have not confessed the Lord Jesus as plainly as I ought to have +done. This afternoon I arrived at the house of my dear friends in +London, who received me with their usual kindness. After prayer I see +it my duty to leave tomorrow for Leamington, to see my physician +there once more, and then to go as soon as I can to Bristol. + +May 5. Leamington. Through the mercy of the Lord the journey to +Germany, concerning which I had prayed so often, is now over, and I +am safely brought back again to this place.--It has been a wet and +cold day, but God has in mercy preserved me from injury, though I got +wet. I had some conversation with a clergyman on the coach; I +confessed the Lord Christ a little, but not plainly enough.--I had +asked the Lord to give me a quiet and cheap resting place in my +former lodgings, if it might be, and accordingly they were unlet. + +May 7. This morning I left Leamington for Bristol. I had grace to +confess the Lord Jesus the last part of the way before several merry +passengers, and had the honour of being ridiculed for His sake. There +are few things in which I feel more entirely dependant upon the Lord, +than in confessing Him on such occasions. Sometimes I have, by grace, +had much real boldness; but often I have manifested the greatest +weakness, doing no more than refraining entirely from unholy +conversation, without, however, speaking a single word for Him who +toiled beyond measure for me. No other remedy do I know for myself +and any of my fellow-saints who are weak, like myself, in this +particular, than to seek to have the heart so full of Jesus, and to +live so in the realization of what He has done for us, that, without +any effort, out of the full heart, we may speak for Him.--I found my +dear family in peace. + +May 8. This evening I went to the prayer meeting at Gideon. I read +Psalm ciii, and was able to thank the Lord publicly for my late +affliction. This is the first time that I have taken any part in the +public meetings of the brethren, since November 6th, 1837. + +May 13. Today I was much helped in expounding the Scriptures +publicly. When I began I knew not how the Lord would deal with me, +whether I should be able to speak or not, as my head is still very +weak. But the Lord helped me. I did not feel any loss of mental +power. How gracious of the Lord to allow me again to commence serving +Him in the ministry of His word.--[For several months after this I +preached, on the whole, with much more enjoyment, and with much more +earnestness and prayerfulness, than I did before I was taken ill. I +also felt more the solemnity of the work.] + +June 11. A stranger called on me, and told me, that, many years ago, +he had defrauded two gentlemen of a small sum, and that he wished to +restore the same with interest. He also stated that he had read my +Narrative, and, feeling confidence in me, he requested me to convey +this money to those gentlemen, giving me, at the same time, their +names and place of abode. He intrusted me with four sovereigns for +each of them. At the same time he gave me one sovereign for myself, +as a token of Christian love. I never saw the individual before, nor +do I up to this moment know his name. I conveyed this money, however, +not by post, as he wished but through two bank orders, in order that +thus I might be able to show, should it be needful, that I actually +did send the money; for in all such matters it becomes one to act +with particular caution.--It may be that this fact will be read by +some who have, like this stranger, before their conversion, defrauded +certain individuals. If so, let them like him, or like Zaccheus of +old, restore what they took, and, if they have the means, with +interest, or compound interest. + +June 13. Last evening my dear wife was taken ill. Often had I prayed +respecting her hour, and now was the time to look out for the answer. +She continued in most severe sufferings from a little after nine +until midnight. Thus hour after hour passed away, until eleven this +morning. Another medical attendant was then called in, at the desire +of the one who attended her. At three in the afternoon she was +delivered of a still-born child.--The whole of the night I was in +prayer, as far as my strength allowed me. I cried at last for MERCY, +and God heard. + +June 14. My dearest wife is alive, but I am depending upon God for +her life every moment. She is in much peace. A sister gave me this +evening 5l. on account of dear Mary's illness.--[Again we had not +thought it well to make pecuniary provision for this time, though at +no period of my life had I more abundant means of doing so than +during the last few months; but our gracious Father helped us +abundantly in this and in other instances, as I shall mention below.] + +June 22. Today there was sent to us anonymously, by post, 5l. for our +own personal expenses, at this the time of our affliction, when our +expenses are so great. The donor accompanied the 5l. note with an +affectionate letter to my wife and myself. + +July 6. My dear wife, who for more than a fortnight after her +delivery was so ill, that the two medical attendants came twice or +three times daily, seems now, humanly speaking, likely to recover, +and to be given back to me as from the dead. Lord, help me so to +receive her! + +July 12. From the commencement of the establishment of the +Orphan-houses, up to the end of June 1838, the hand of the Lord was +seen in the abundance with which He was pleased to supply me with the +means for maintaining nearly 100 persons. Now, however, the time is +come when "the Father of the fatherless" will show His especial care +over them in another way.--The funds, which were this day twelvemonth +about 780l., are now reduced to about 20l.; but, thanks be to the +Lord, my faith is as strong, or stronger, than it was when we had the +larger sum in hand; nor has He at any time, from the commencement of +the work, allowed me to distrust Him. Nevertheless, as our Lord will +be inquired of, and as real faith is manifested as such by leading to +prayer, I gave myself to prayer with brother T---- of the Boy's +Orphan-House, who had called on me, and who, besides my wife, and +brother Craik, is the only individual to whom I speak about the state +of the funds. While we were praying, an orphan child from Frome was +brought, and some believers at Frome, having collected among them +5l., sent this money with the child. Thus we received the first +answer at a time of need. We have given notice for seven children to +come in, and purpose to give notice for five more, though our funds +are so low, hoping that God will look on our necessities. [Observe +how gently the Lord dealt with us, in that, when want approached, He +helped at once, in immediate answer to prayer, in order thus to +increase our confidence in Him; but, at the same time, to prepare us +for sharper trials of our faith.] + +June 17 and 18. These two days we have had two especial prayer +meetings, from 6 to 9 in the evening, to commend publicly to the Lord +the Boys' Orphan-House. The meetings had been deferred until now, on +account of my illness. In the morning of the 18th I expounded, with +especial reference to children, 1 Samuel iii., before above 550 +children, being our Orphan and Day-School children, and, as many as +could come, of those belonging to the Sunday-School. What a great +work! What an honour to be allowed to provide Scriptural instruction +for so many little ones. Lord, help me to make use of my talents for +the benefit of the rising generation, and let me serve my generation +according to Thy will!---Our funds for the Orphans are now very low. +There are about 20l. in hand, and in a few days 30l. at least will be +needed; but I purposely avoided saying any thing about our present +necessities, and spoke only, to the praise of God, about the +abundance with which our gracious Father, "The Father of the +fatherless," has hitherto supplied us. This was done in order that +the hand of God, in sending help, may be so much the more clearly +seen. + +July 22. This evening I was walking in our little garden, meditating +on Heb. xiii. 8, "Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and today, and for +ever." Whilst meditating on His unchangeable love, power, wisdom, +&c.--and turning all, as I went on, into prayer respecting myself; +and whilst applying likewise His unchangeable love, and power, and +wisdom, &c., both to my present spiritual and temporal circumstances:---all +at once the present need of the Orphan-Houses was brought to my +mind. Immediately I was led to say to myself, Jesus in His love and +power has hitherto supplied me with what I have needed for the +Orphans, and in the same unchangeable love and power He will provide +me with what I may need for the future. A flow of joy came into my +soul whilst realizing thus the unchangeableness of our adorable Lord. +About one minute after, a letter was brought me, enclosing a bill for +20l. In it was written: "Will you apply the amount of the enclosed +bill to the furtherance of the objects of your Scriptural Knowledge +Society, or of your Orphan Establishment, or in the work and cause of +our Master in any way that He Himself, on your application to Him, +may point out to you. It is not a great sum, but it is a sufficient +provision for the exigency of today; and it is for today's +exigencies, that, ordinarily, the Lord provides. Tomorrow, as it +brings its demands, will find its supply, etc." [Of this 20l. I took +10l. for the Orphan fund, and 10l. for the other objects, and was +thus enabled to meet the expenses of about 34l. which, in connection +with the Orphan-Houses, came upon me within four days afterwards, and +which I knew beforehand would come.] + +On July 26 sailed from Liverpool for the East Indies, for Missionary +service, twelve German brethren and three sisters, as the result of +the journey of brother ---- and myself to the Continent, in April last. + +July 27. Yesterday the funds for the Orphans were reduced to 5l. +Blessed be God, my confidence in Him was unshaken! I received +yesterday 2l. 13s. Today I was going with my family for change of air +to Durdham Down, and thought it well, therefore, to take out any +money which there might be in the Orphan-Box in my house. When I +opened it, I found a ten pound note and three half crowns. I had been +waiting on God for means, both yesterday and today, and thus He has +again shown how willing He is to help. + +Aug. 6. During this week I shall have to pay again at least 35l. for +the Orphans, and have but about 19l. towards it. My eyes are up to +the "Father of the fatherless." I believe He will help, though I knew +not how. + +Aug. 7. How graciously has the Lord again appeared, and that in so +short a time! How has he sent help, from altogether unexpected +quarters! I have been praying yesterday and today earnestly, +beseeching the Lord now to appear, and show His power, that the +enemies might not say, "Where is now thy God?" I reminded Him +especially, that I had commenced the work that it might be seen, that +He, even in our day, is willing to answer prayer, and that the +provision for our Orphans might be a visible proof to all around us +of this truth. And now observe! Last evening brother Craik told me +that 10l. had been given him for the work in our hands; 5l. for the +Orphans, and 5l. for the School--Bible--and Missionary fund. Today, +having to pay 25l., and not having quite enough, when I went to +brother T---- for the money which he might have received, as I knew that +25s. had been given to him, I took with me the keys of the boxes in +the Orphan-Houses, to see whether the Lord had sent in a little. I +opened the box in the Boys'-Orphan-House, and found 1l. 7s. 5 1/2d. +Immediately after I received from brother T---- 13l. 19s. 10d., the +greater part of which, as he told me, had come in within the last few +days. Thus our adorable Lord has once more delivered; for I have now +even more than enough to meet the current expenses of this week. + +Aug. 16. When today the account books of the Boys'-Orphan-House were +brought, several days sooner than I had expected them, it was found +that there was 1l. 6s. 6d. due to the matron. Besides this, money was +to be advanced for house-keeping, and there was only 13s. 5 1/2d. in +hand. To this one of those connected with the work added 2l. This 2l. +13s. 5 1/2d. was sent to the matron, whilst we were waiting upon God +to send more help. In the evening the boxes at the Girls' and +Infant-Orphan-Houses were opened, and in them was found 3l. 7s. 5 +1/2d. Thus the Lord has kindly helped us again for two or three days. + +Aug. 18. I have not one penny in hand for the Orphans. In a day or +two again many pounds will be needed. My eyes are up to the Lord. +Evening. Before this day is over, I have received from a sister 5l. +She had some time since put away her trinkets, to be sold for the +benefit of the Orphans. This morning, whilst in prayer, it came to +her mind, I have this 5l., and owe no man any thing, therefore it +would be better to give this money at once, as it may be some time, +before I can dispose of the trinkets. She therefore brought it, +little knowing that there was not a penny in hand, and that I had +been able to advance only 4l. l5s. 5d. for housekeeping in the +Boys'-Orphan-House, instead of the usual 10l.; little knowing also, +that within a few days many pounds more will be needed. May my soul +be greatly encouraged by this fresh token of my gracious Lord's +faithfulness! + +Aug. 20. The 5l. which I had received on the 18th, had been given for +house-keeping, so that today I was again penniless. But my eyes were +up to the Lord. I gave myself to prayer this morning, knowing that I +should want again this week at least 13l., if not above 20l. Today I +received 12l. in answer to prayer, from a lady who is staying at +Clifton, whom I had never seen before. Adorable Lord, grant that this +may be a fresh encouragement to me. + +Aug. 23. Today I was again without one single penny, when 3l. was +sent from Clapham, with a box of new clothes for the Orphans. + +Aug. 29. Today sixteen believers were baptized. Of all the baptisms +which we have had, this was, perhaps, the most remarkable. Among +those who were baptized was an aged brother of above 84 years, and +one above 70. For the latter his believing wife had prayed 38 years, +and at last the Lord answered her prayers in his conversion. Should +any believer who may read this, be on the point of growing weary in +prayer for his unconverted relatives, because of the answer being +delayed, the above fact may be instrumental in stirring up such a one +to give himself to prayer with renewed earnestness and strengthened +expectation. "In due season we shall reap, if we faint not." There +were also amongst those who were baptized a blind brother and sister, +and two very young persons. + +Aug. 31. I have been waiting on the Lord for means, as the matron's +books from the Girls'-Orphan-House have been brought, and there is no +money in hand to advance for house-keeping. But as yet the Lord has +not been pleased to send help. As the matron called today for money, +one of the labourers gave 2l. of his own, for the present necessities. + +Sept. 1. The Lord in His wisdom and love has not yet sent help. +Whence it is to come, need not be my care. But I believe God will, in +due time, send help. His hour is not yet come. As there was money +needed in the Boys'-Orphan-House also, the same brother, just alluded +to, gave 2l. for that also. Thus we were delivered at this time +likewise. But now his means are gone. This is the most trying hour +that as yet I have had in the work, as it regards means; but I know +that I shall yet praise the Lord for His help. I have mentioned my +arguments before Him, and my gracious Lord, "the Father of the +fatherless," will send help. + +Sept. 3. This morning the Lord again helped by 2l., which another +labourer connected with the work gave. This 2l., together with +sixpence which had been given anonymously, was sent off to the +Girls'-Orphan-House, where all the money must be gone. There came in +further 1l. 14s. 8d. in the course of the day, which was given to the +matron of the Boys'-Orphan-House. + +Sept. 5. Our hour of trial continues still. The Lord mercifully has +given enough to supply our daily necessities; but He gives by the day +now, and almost by the hour, as we need it. Nothing came in +yesterday. I have besought the Lord again and again, both yesterday +and today. It is as if the Lord said: "Mine hour is not yet come." +But I have faith in God. I believe that He surely will send help, +though I know not whence it is to come. Many pounds are needed within +a few days, and there is not a penny in hand. This morning 2l. was +given for the present necessities, by one of the labourers in the +work.--Evening: This very day the Lord sent again some help to +encourage me to continue to wait on Him, and to trust in Him. As I +was praying this afternoon respecting the matter, I felt fully +assured that the Lord would send help, and praised Him beforehand for +His help, and asked Him to encourage our hearts through it. I have +been also led yesterday and today to ask the Lord especially, that He +would not allow my faith to fail. A few minutes after I had prayed, +brother T---- came and brought 4l. 1s. 5d., which had come in, in +several small donations. He told me, at the same time, that tomorrow +the books will be brought from the Infant-Orphan-House, when money +must be advanced for housekeeping. I thought for a moment, it might +be well to keep 3l. of this money for that purpose. But it occurred +to me immediately, "Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." The +Lord can provide, by tomorrow, much more than I need, and I +therefore sent 3l. to one of the sisters, whose quarterly salary was +due, and the remaining 1l. 1s. 5d. to the Boys'-Orphan-House for +housekeeping. Thus I am still penniless. My hope is in God: He will +provide. + +Sept. 6. This morning the books were brought from the +Infant-Orphan-House, and the matron sent to ask when she should fetch +them, implying, when they would have been looked over, and when money +would be advanced for housekeeping. I said "tomorrow," though I had +not a single penny in hand. About an hour after, brother T---- sent me a +note, to say that he had received 1l. this morning, and that last +evening a brother had sent 29lbs. of salt, 44 dozen of onions, and +26lbs. of groats. + +Sept. 7. The time had come that I had to send money to the +Infant-Orphan-House, but the Lord had not sent any more. I gave, +therefore, the 1l. which had come in yesterday, and 2s. 2d. which had +been put into the box in my house, trusting to the good Lord to send +in more. + +Sept. 8. Saturday evening. I am still in the hour of probation. It +has not pleased my gracious Lord to send me help as yet.--The evening +before last I heard brother Craik preach on Genesis xii., about +Abraham's faith. He showed how all went on well, as long as Abraham +acted in faith, and walked according to the will of God; and how all +failed when he distrusted God. Two points I felt particularly +important in my case. 1. That I may not go any by-ways, or ways of my +own, for deliverance. I have about 220l. in the bank, which, for +other purposes in the Lord's work, has been entrusted to me by a +brother and a sister. I might take of this money, and say but to the +sister--and write but to the brother, that I have taken, in these my +straits, 20l., 50l., or 100l., for the Orphans, and they would be +quite satisfied (for both of them have liberally given for the +Orphans, and the brother has more than once told me, only to let him +know when I wanted money;) but this would be a deliverance of my own, +not God's deliverance. Besides, it would be no small barrier to the +exercise of faith, in the next hour of trial. 2. I was particularly +reminded afresh, in hearing brother Craik, of the danger of +dishonouring the Lord in that very way in which I have, through His +grace, in some small measure brought glory to Him, even by trusting +in Him.--Yesterday and today I have been pleading with God eleven +arguments, why He would be graciously pleased to send help. My mind +has been in peace respecting the matter. Yesterday the peace amounted +even to joy in the Holy Ghost But this I must say, that the burden of +my prayer, during the last days, has been chiefly, that the Lord in +mercy would keep my faith from failing. My eyes are up to Him. He can +help soon. One thing I am sure of: In His own way, and in His own +time He will help. The arguments which I plead with God are: + +1. That I set about the work for the glory of God, i e. that there +might be a visible proof, by God supplying, in answer to prayer only, +the necessities of the Orphans, that He is the living God, and most +willing, even in our day, to answer prayer; and that, therefore, He +would be pleased to send supplies. + +2. That God is the "Father of the fatherless," and that He, +therefore, as their Father, would be pleased to provide. Psalm +lxviii. 5. + +3. That I have received the children in the name of Jesus, and that, +therefore, He, in these children, has been received, and is fed, and +is clothed; and that, therefore, He would be pleased to consider +this. Mark ix. 36, 37. + +4. That the faith of many of the children of God has been +strengthened by this work hitherto, and that, if God were to withhold +the means for the future, those who are weak in faith would be +staggered; whilst by a continuance of means, their faith might still +further be strengthened. + +5. That many enemies would laugh, were the Lord to withhold supplies, +and say, did we not foretell that this enthusiasm would come to +nothing? + +6. That many of the children of God, who are uninstructed, or in a +carnal state, would feel themselves justified to continue their +alliance with the world in the work of God, and to go on as +heretofore, in their unscriptural proceedings respecting similar +institutions, so far as the obtaining of means is concerned, if He +were not to help me. + +7. That the Lord would remember that I am His child, and that He +would graciously pity me, and remember that I cannot provide for +these children, and that therefore He would not allow this burden to +lie upon me long without sending help. + +8. That He would remember likewise my fellow-labourers in the work, +who trust in Him, but who would be tried were He to withhold supplies. + +9. That He would remember that I should have to dismiss the children +from under our Scriptural instruction to their former companions. + +10. That He would show, that those were mistaken who said, that, at +the first, supplies might be expected, while the thing was new, but +not afterwards. + +11. That I should not know, were He to withhold means, what +construction I should put upon all the many most remarkable answers +to prayer, which He had given me heretofore in connexion with this +work, and which most fully have shown to me that it is of God. + +In some small measure I now understand, experimentally, the meaning +of that word "how long," which so frequently occurs in the prayers of +the Psalms. But even now, by the grace of God, my eyes are up unto +Him only, and I believe that He will send help. + +Sept. 10. Monday morning. Neither Saturday nor yesterday had any +money come in. It appeared to me now needful to take some steps on +account of our need, i.e., to go to the Orphan Houses, call the +brethren and sisters together, (who, except brother T----, had never +been informed about the state of the funds), state the case to them, +see how much money was needed for the present, tell them that amidst +all this trial of faith I still believed that God would help, and to +pray with them. Especially, also, I meant to go for the sake of +telling them that no more articles must be purchased than we have the +means to pay for, but to let there be nothing lacking in any way to +the children, as it regards nourishing food and needful clothing; for +I would rather at once send them away than that they should lack. I +meant to go for the sake also of seeing whether there were still +articles remaining which had been sent for the purpose of being sold, +or whether there were any articles really needless, that we might +turn them into money. I felt that the matter was now come to a solemn +crisis.--About half-past nine six-pence came in, which had been put +anonymously into the box at Gideon Chapel. This money seemed to me +like an earnest, that God would have compassion and send more. About +ten, after I had returned from brother Craik, to whom I had unbosomed +my heart again, whilst once more in prayer for help, a sister called +who gave two sovereigns to my wife for the Orphans, stating that she +had felt herself stirred up to come, and that she had delayed coming +already too long. A few minutes after, when I went into the room +where she was, she gave me two sovereigns more, and all this without +knowing the least about our need. Thus the Lord most mercifully has +sent us a little help, to the great encouragement of my faith. A few +minutes after I was called on for money from the Infant-Orphan-House, +to which I sent 2l., and 1l. 0s. 6d. to the Boys'-Orphan-House, +and 1l. to the Girls'-Orphan-House. + +Brother Craik left Bristol today for a few days in company with +another brother. I should have gone with them for the sake of +obtaining some quiet for my head; but I must remain, to pass with my +dear Orphans through the trial; though these dear little ones know +nothing about it, because their tables are as well supplied as when +there was 800l. in the bank, and they have lack of nothing. + +Today I saw a young brother who, as well as one of his sisters, had +been brought to the knowledge of the Lord through my Narrative. + +Sept. 11. The good Lord, in His wisdom, still sees it needful to keep +us very low. But this afternoon brother T---- called, and told me that +one of our fellow-labourers had sold his metal watch, and two gold +pins, for 1l. 1s., that 9s. 6d. had come in, and that two of our +fellow-labourers had sent two lots of books of their own, 19 and 21 +in number, to be sold for the Orphans. What an abundant blessing, +that in such a season of trial I have such fellow-labourers! This 1l. +10s. 6d. was given to the Boys'-Orphan-House. + +Sept. 12. Still the trial continues. Only 9s. came in today, given by +one of the labourers. In the midst of this great trial of faith the +Lord still mercifully keeps me in great peace. He also allows me to +see, that our labour is not in vain; for yesterday died Leah +Culliford, one of the orphans, about 9 years old, truly converted, +and brought to the faith some months before her departure. + +Sept. 13. No help has come yet. This morning found it was absolutely +needful to tell the brethren and sisters about the state of the +funds, and to give necessary directions as to not going into debt, +etc. We prayed together, and had a very happy meeting. They all +seemed comfortable 12s. 6d. was taken out of the boxes in the three +houses, 12s. one of the labourers gave, and 1l. 1s. had come in for +needlework done by the children. + +One of the sisters, who is engaged in the work, sent a message after +me, not to trouble myself about her salary, for she should not want +any for a twelvemonth. What a blessing to have such fellow-labourers! + +Sept. 14. I met again this morning with the brethren and sisters for +prayer, as the Lord has not yet sent help. After prayer one of the +labourers gave me all the money he had, 16s., saying that it would +not be upright to pray, if he were not to give what he had. One of +the sisters told me, that in six days she would give 6l., which she +had in the Savings' Bank for such a time of need. God be praised for +such fellow-labourers!---Up to this day the matrons of the three +houses had been in the habit of paying the bakers and the milkman +weekly, because they had preferred to receive the payments in this +way, and sometimes it had thus been also with the butcher and grocer. +But now, as the Lord deals out to us by the day, we considered it +would be wrong to go on any longer in this way, as the week's payment +might become due, and we have no money to meet it; and thus those +with whom we deal might be inconvenienced by us, and we be found +acting against the commandment of the Lord, "Owe no man anything." +Rom. xiii. 8. From this day, and hence-forward, whilst the Lord gives +to us our supplies by the day, we purpose therefore to pay at once +for every article as it is purchased, and never to buy anything +except we can pay for it at once, however much it may seem to be +needed, and however much those with whom we deal may wish to be paid +only by the week. The little which was owed was paid off this day.--When +I came home I found a large parcel of new clothes, which had +been sent from Dublin for the Orphans, a proof that tire Lord +remembers us still. We met again in the evening for prayer. We were +of good cheer, and still BELIEVE that the Lord will supply our need. + +Sept. 15. Saturday. We met again this morning for prayer. God +comforts our hearts. We are looking for help. I found that there were +provisions enough for today and tomorrow, but there was no money in +hand to take in bread as usual, in order that the children might not +have newly baked bread. This afternoon one of the labourers, who had +been absent for several days from Bristol, returned, and gave 1l. +This evening we met again for prayer, when I found that 10s. 6d. more +had come in since the morning. With this 1l. 10s. 6d. we were able to +buy, even this Saturday evening, the usual quantity of bread, (as it +might be difficult to get stale bread on Monday morning,) and have +some money left. God be praised, who gave us grace to come to the +decision not to take any bread today, as usual, nor to buy any thing +for which we cannot pay at once. We were very comfortable, thankfully +taking this money out of our Father's hands, as a proof that He still +cares for us, and that, in His own time, He will send us larger sums. + +Today, a brother kindly paid the bill for medical attendance on my +dear wife during her confinement. The same brother also had paid, +some weeks since, the second medical attendant, who was called in. +Thus the Lord, in various ways, sends help to us, showing continually +His fatherly care over us. + +Sept. 16. Lord's day afternoon. We met again for prayer respecting +supplies for the Orphans. We are in peace, and our hope is in God, +that He graciously will appear, though but one shilling has come in +since last evening. + +Sept. 17. The trial still continues. It is now more and more trying, +even to faith, as each day comes. Truly, the Lord has wise purposes +in allowing us to call so long upon Him for help. But I am sure God +will send help, if we can but wait. One of the labourers had had a +little money come in, of which he gave 12s. 6d.; another labourer +gave 11s. 8d., being all the money she had left: this, with 17s. 6d., +which, partly, had come in, and, partly, was in hand, enabled us to +pay what needed to be paid, and to purchase provisions, so that +nothing yet, in any way, has been lacking. This evening I was rather +tried respecting the long delay of larger sums coming; but being led +to go to the Scriptures for comfort, my soul was greatly refreshed, +and my faith again strengthened, by the xxxivth Psalm, so that I went +very cheerfully to meet with my dear fellow-labourers for prayer. I +read to them the Psalm, and sought to cheer their hearts through the +precious promises contained in it. + +Sept. 18. Brother T. had 25s. in hand, and I had 3s. This 1l. 8s. +enabled us to buy the meat and bread, which was needed; a little tea +for one of the houses, and milk for all; no more than this is needed. +Thus the Lord has provided not only for this day, but there is bread +for two days in hand. Now, however, we are come to an extremity. The +funds are exhausted. The labourers, who had a little money, have +given as long as they had any left.--Now observe how the Lord helped +us! A lady from the neighbourhood of London who brought a parcel with +money from her daughter, arrived four or five days since in Bristol, +and took lodgings next door to the Boys' Orphan-House. This afternoon +she herself kindly brought me the money, amounting to 3l. 2s. 6d. We +had been reduced so low as to be on the point of selling those things +which could be spared; but this morning I had asked the Lord, if it +might be, to prevent the necessity of our doing so. That the money +had been so near the Orphan-Houses for several days without being +given, is a plain proof that it was from the beginning in the heart +of God to help us; but, because He delights in the prayers of His +children, He had allowed us to pray so long; also to try our faith, +and to make the answer so much the sweeter. It is indeed a precious +deliverance. I burst out into loud praises and thanks the first +moment I was alone, after I had received the money. I met with my +fellow-labourers again this evening for prayer and praise; their +hearts were not a little cheered. This money was this evening +divided, and will comfortably provide for all that will be needed +tomorrow. + +Sept. 20. Morning. The Lord has again kindly sent in a little. Last +evening was given to me 1s. 6d., and this morning 1l. 3s. Evening. +This evening the Lord sent still further supplies; 8l. 11s. 2 1/2d. +came in, as a further proof that the Lord is not unmindful of us. +There was in the box of the Girls' Orphan-House 1l. 1s., and in that +of the Boys' Orphan-House 1l. 7s. 2 1/2d. One of the labourers, in +accordance with her promise this day week, gave 6l. 3s. About +eighteen months ago she saw it right no longer to have money for +herself in the Savings' Bank, and she therefore, in her heart, gave +the money which she had there to the Orphan-Houses, intending to draw +it in a time of need. Some time since (she told me this evening) she +drew a part of it to buy several useful articles for the +Orphan-Houses; now the sum was reduced to 6l. When she found out the +present need, she went this day week to the Savings' Bank, and gave +notice that she wished to draw her money today. Truly, as long as God +shall be pleased to give me such fellow-labourers, His blessing will +rest upon the work! This 8l. 11s. 2 1/2d. was divided this evening to +supply the three houses, and we thanked God, unitedly, for His help. + +Sept. 22. Both yesterday and today we have again assembled for prayer +and praise. We are in no immediate want, but on the 29th 19l. 10s. +will be due for the rent of the three Orphan-Houses.--Today there was +only 4s. 7d. in hand for the other objects of the Institution, though +it was the pay-day for some of the teachers. My comfort was the +living God. During this week He had helped me so repeatedly and in +such a remarkable way, as it regards the Orphan-Houses, that it would +have been doubly sinful not to have trusted in Him for help under +this fresh difficulty. No money came in this morning. About two, the +usual time when the teachers are paid, a sovereign was given, with +which I went immediately to brother T. (who attends to this part of +the work), to pay at least in part, the weekly salaries. I found that +he had received a sovereign in the morning. By means of this +sovereign, together with the one which I had received just at the +moment when it was needed, we were helped through this day. + +Sept. 25. Yesterday and the previous days we have continued to +assemble for prayer. In four days the rent for the Orphan-Houses will +be due, and we have nothing towards it; also, the housekeeping money +in the three houses is now again gone. May the Lord have compassion +on us, and continue to send us help! A little came in this morning: +there was found 9s. 6d. in the box in my house. + +Sept. 27. The 9s. 6d. which came in the day before yesterday, was +given to the Infant-Orphan-House. Thus we were helped through that +day and yesterday. There was every thing that was needed in the +three houses; I had made particular enquiry; there was meat even for +today. We met yesterday again for prayer. Today I was not able to go, +on account of indisposition; I sent, therefore, to brother T. to +request him to divide the l8s. 6d., (10s. of which had come in last +evening, and 8s. 6d. of which we had in hand), between the three +matrons. This afternoon I hear of a fresh deliverance which the Lord +has wrought. About five weeks ago, a farmer applied for the admission +of an orphan-girl, his grand-daughter. As I knew, however, that he +had the means of providing for her, and as our Institution is only +for destitute orphans, I informed him that the child could only be +received, on condition of his paying 10l. a year for her support, +(which is about the average expense for the younger girls), and this, +quarterly, in advance.4 This morning he came, brought the child, and +paid 2l. 10s. in advance, and gave 1l. besides. Thus the Lord has +again most seasonably helped us in this our time of need. May He keep +the memory of these deliverances alive in our souls, and increase our +confidence in Him by every fresh one! In less than two days we have +to pay 19l. 10s. for rent! May the Lord keep us looking to Him, and +mercifully send help! + +Sept. 29. Saturday evening. Prayer has been made for several days +past respecting the rent, which is due this day. I have been looking +out for it, though I knew not whence a shilling was to come. This +morning brother T. called on me, and, as no money had come in, we +prayed together, and continued in supplication from ten till a +quarter to twelve. Twelve o'clock struck (the time when the rent +ought to have been paid), but no money had been sent. For some days +past I have repeatedly had a misgiving, whether the Lord might not +disappoint us, in order that we might be led to provide by the week, +or the day, for the rent. This is the second, and only the second, +complete failure as to answers of prayer in the work, during the past +four years and six months. The first was about the half-yearly rent +of Castle-Green school-room, due July 1, 1837, which had come in only +in part by that time. I am now fully convinced that the rent ought to +be put by daily or weekly, as God may prosper us, in order that the +work, even as to this point, may be a testimony. May the Lord, then, +help us to act accordingly; and may He now mercifully send in the +means to pay the rent!--Whilst in this matter our prayers have +failed, either to humble us, or to show us how weak our faith is +still, or to teach us, (which seems to me the most probable,) that we +ought to provide the rent beforehand; the Lord has given us again +fresh proofs, even this day, that He is mindful of us. There was not +money enough in the Girls'-Orphan-House to take in bread, (we give +the bread to the children on the third day after it is baked); but +before the baker came, a lady called who had had some needlework done +by the children, and paid 3s. 11d., and thus the matron was able to +take in bread as usual. I found this morning 2s. in the box in my +house, our extremity having led me to look into it. One of the +labourers gave 13s. This 15s. was divided amongst the three matrons. +Thanks to the Lord, there is all which is needed for today and +tomorrow. + +Sept. 30. We are not only poor as regards the Orphan-fund, but also +the funds for the other objects bring us again and again to the Lord +for fresh supplies. Today, when we had not a single penny in hand, +5l. was given for the other objects. + +Oct. 2. Tuesday evening. The Lord's holy name be praised! He hath +dealt most bountifully with us during the last three days! The day +before yesterday 5l. came in for the Orphans. Of this I gave to each +house 10s. which supplied them before the provisions were consumed. +Oh! how kind is the Lord. Always, before there has been actual want, +He has sent help. Yesterday came in 1l. 10s. more. This 1l. 10s., +with 4s. 2d. in hand, was divided for present necessities. Thus the +expenses of yesterday, for housekeeping, were defrayed. The Lord +helped me also to pay yesterday the 19l. 10s. for the rent. The means +for it were thus obtained. One of the labourers had received through +his family 10l., and 5l. besides from a sister in the Lord; also some +other money. Of this he gave 16l., which, with the 3l. 10s. that was +left of the above-mentioned 5l., which came in the day before +yesterday, made up 19l. 10s., the sum which was needed. + +--This day we were again greatly reduced. There was no money in hand +to take in bread as usual, for the Boys' and Infant Orphan-Houses, +but again the Lord helped. A sister who had arrived this afternoon +from Swansea brought 1l. 7s., and one of the labourers sold an +article, by means of which he was able to give 1l. 13s. Thus we had +3l.:---1l. for each house, and could buy bread before the day was +over. Hitherto we have lacked nothing! + +Oct. 4. Thursday. The money of Tuesday helped us through yesterday. +Today, when again all was gone, and help was greatly needed, our +loving Lord appeared. The books which had been given some time since, +by some of my fellow-labourers, were sold for 11s., also an old +bedstead for 2s. 6d., and an old sofa for 10s. The boxes were also +opened, as I had been told some money had been put in, and 9s. 1d. +was found in them. This money was a fresh encouragement to us in our +need. By this 1l. 12s. 7d. we were helped through the day. + +Oct. 5. This morning, just before I was going to the Orphan-Houses to +meet with the brethren and sisters for prayer, 1l. 3s. was brought +from Teignmouth. This money seems to have been given some months +since to a brother at Teignmouth, but it did not reach me until +today. It is a most seasonable help, to defray the expenses of this +day, and a fresh proof, that not in anger, but only for the trial of +our faith, our gracious Lord delays as yet, to send larger sums. + +Oct. 6. Saturday. The Lord has again most kindly helped us. It came +to my mind that there were some new blankets in the Orphan-Houses, +which had been given some time since, but which are not needed, and +might therefore be sold. I was confirmed in this by finding that the +moth had got into one pair. I therefore sold ten pairs, having a good +opportunity to do so. Thus the Lord not only supplied again our +present need for the three houses, but I was also able to put by the +rent for this week and the next, acting out the light which He had +given us this day week. There came in 9s. 6d., besides 7l. for the +blankets. The School fund, also, was again completely exhausted, when +today and yesterday came in so much, that not only the weekly +salaries could be paid today, but also above 1l. could be put by for +rent. + +Oct. 9. Through the last-mentioned supplies for the Orphans we were +helped up to this day; but today we were brought lower than ever. The +provisions would have lasted out only today, and the money for milk +in one of the houses could only be made up by one of the labourers +selling one of his books. The matron in the Boys'-Orphan-House had +this morning two shillings left. When in doubt whether to buy bread +with it, or more meat, to make up the dinner with the meat which she +had in the house, the baker called, and left three quarterns of bread +as a present. In this great need, some money having been given to one +of the labourers, he gave 2l. of it, by which we were able to buy +meat, bread, and other provisions. Nevertheless even this day, low as +we had been brought, before this 2l. was given, there had been all in +the house that was needed. + +Oct. 10. The Lord had sent in so much since yesterday afternoon, that +we were able at our meeting this morning to divide 2l. 0s. 2d. +between the three matrons, whereby we are helped through this day. +But now the coals in the Infant-Orphan-House are out, and nearly so +in the other two houses. Also the treacle casks in all the three +houses are nearly empty. On this account we have asked the Lord for +fresh supplies. + +Oct. 11. The "Father of the fatherless" has again shown his care over +us. An Orphan from Devonshire arrived last evening. With her was sent +2l. 5s. 6d. The sister who brought her gave also a silver tea-pot, +sugar-basin, and cream jug (of the weight of 48 oz.), having found +true riches in Christ. There was also in the boxes 9s. One of the +labourers paid for a ton of coals. We obtained 16l. 16s. for the +silver articles.--Thus we were helped through the heavy expenses of +the following days. + +Oct. 12. Today seven brethren and sisters were added to us in +fellowship, and eight were proposed. May the Lord send helpers for +the work! + +Oct. 13. For three months past the Orphan fund has been low, yet +hitherto we have lacked nothing! + +Oct. 15. I knew that there would be money needed this morning, for +many things in the Orphan-Houses, and my heart was therefore lifted +up to the Lord. Just when I was going to meet my fellow labourers for +prayer, I received from Trowbridge 4l. There had come in also at the +Orphan-Houses 7s. 3d. To this one of the labourers added 1l. Thus I +was enabled abundantly to supply all that was wanted, and to pay for +a cask of treacle and a ton of coals. We are now, however, cast again +on the love of our Lord for further supplies, as there is neither any +thing in hand, nor have the labourers any more of their own to give. + +Oct. 16. The day commenced with mercies. I was looking up to the Lord +for help, early this morning, when, almost immediately afterwards, +brother T. came, and brought two silver table-spoons, and six +tea-spoons, which had been left, anonymously, yesterday afternoon, at +the Girls'-Orphan-House. This afternoon I received 12l. from +Staffordshire. On the seal of the letter, which enclosed the money, +was "Ebenezer." How true in our case! Surely this instance is a fresh +"Ebenezer" to us; for hitherto the Lord has helped us.--There was also +found a half sovereign in the box at my house. Also a lady left 5s. +at the door of the Girls'-Orphan-House, with about 200 pears for the +children; and a brother sent 2s., the first fruits of the increase of +his wages. Thus I was able to give a larger supply than usual to the +matrons. + +Oct. 22. Today our funds were again quite low. In the +Infant-Orphan-House only 2d. was left, and very little in the other +two houses. But the Lord most manifestly again answered prayer. A +gentleman from London, who is greatly interested about destitute and +neglected children, came over from Bath with two of his sisters to +see the Orphan-Houses. He gave 1l. There was 2s. 6d. put into the box +at my house, and 6d. anonymously into the box at Gideon Chapel. With +this 1l. 3s. I went directly to the Orphan-Houses to relieve the +present need. Whilst I was there, the Lord gave still further +supplies; for being informed that in the morning some ladies had seen +the houses, and put money into the boxes, I opened them and found 3l. +0s. ld. Thus the Lord, by means of this 4l. 3s. 1d., helped us +through the necessities of this day. + +Oct. 23. The Lord again sent above 2l., which supplied this day's +necessities. + +Oct. 24. Today the Lord sent from a most unexpected quarter 5l. The +money was given by a relative of two children in the Boys'-Orphan-House. +Thus we are helped for two days, and are able to put by the rent +for this week. + +Oct. 27. Saturday. This day we have been again mercifully helped, +though our need has been almost greater than ever. But, thanks to our +adorable Lord! this day also we have not been confounded; for there +was 6s. in the box at the Infant-Orphan-House, and 6s. came in for +things which had been given to be sold. To this one of the labourers +added 18s. By means of this 1l. 10s. we have been able to meet all +pressing demands, and to procure provisions for today and tomorrow. + +Oct. 29. Monday. The Lord has again given us this day our daily +bread, though, in the morning, there was not the least natural +prospect of obtaining supplies. One of the labourers, who had +received some money for his own personal expenses, gave 2l. Some +things also, which had been given for sale, had been sold for 18s.; +and 6d. had been put into the box at Gideon Chapel This 2l. 18s. 6d. +enabled us to meet the expenses of this day. There were also many +articles of worn clothes sent. + +Oct. 30. This has been again a day of peculiar mercies in reference +to the funds. Whilst I was in prayer respecting them, a brother +brought 2 1/4 yards of cloth. He had bought it for himself, but, +afterwards considering that he had sufficient clothes, he gave it to +be sold for the Orphans. This evening a sister gave me 20l., ten of +which were for the Orphans, and ten for the other objects. Thus we +are helped for this week. + +Nov. 4. Lord's day. There was given, by a stranger, last Wednesday +evening, at Bethesda Chapel, to one of the sisters, a sovereign for +the Orphans, which I received today. Thus the Lord has again begun +the week with mercy, and His love surely will help us through it, +though again many pounds will be needed. + +Nov. 5. Monday. By means of the sovereign which had come in +yesterday, and several small donations today and on the past days, +together with 2l. 10s. which one of the labourers added of his own, +6l. 2s. 6d. was divided this day between the three matrons, which +will supply their need for two days at least. + +Nov. 7. The funds are now again completely exhausted. Today I divided +1l. 3s. 8d., which had come in yesterday; thus the necessary wants +were supplied. The Lord be praised who has helped us hitherto! One of +the Orphans was sent today to service, and the Lord enabled us to +give her a suitable outfit. + +Nov. 8. Last evening 1l. 4s. came in, which, being divided between +the three houses, helped us through this day. + +Nov. 10. Saturday. All seemed to be dark, so far as regards natural +appearances, at the commencement of this day. But through this day +also the Lord has helped us, and enabled us to meet all demands. In +the course of the day came in 1l. 8s. 6d. To this two of the +labourers added 10s. each, and thus we were brought to the close of +one more week, having been able to supply the necessities of 97 +persons in the Orphan-Houses, without owing any thing. + +Nov. 12. Monday. Sixpence came in this morning, to which one of the +labourers added 10s. 6d., to meet the most pressing necessities. This +evening I found the 1l. was not enough to take in bread for the +Boys'-Orphan-House. The Lord gave us, however, before the day was +over, enough to buy the usual quantity of bread; for there was found +in the boxes 5s. 9d. and a pair of small gold earrings. + +Nov. 13. This morning our want was again great. I have 20l. in hand +which has been put by for rent, but, for the Lord's honour, I would +not take of it. Nothing had come in, and the labourers had scarcely +any thing to give. I went, however, to the Orphan-Houses, to pray +with my fellow labourers, and, if it might be, to comfort them, and +see what could be done. When I came there, I found that 19s. 6d. had +come in this morning. On enquiry I heard that only 2s. 6d. more was +needed to carry us through the day. This one of the labourers was +able to add of his own. Thus the Lord has again helped us out of our +difficulty. One of the labourers gave some things which he could do +without, and another gave a workbox to be sold for the Orphans.--Before +this day has come to an end, the Lord has sent in 1l. 2s. 4d. more, so +that we have also a little for tomorrow. + +Nov. 15. The money which had come in the day before yesterday, +supplied the necessities of yesterday also; but today we were brought +again very low. I went to the Orphan-Houses, to pray with my +fellow-labourers, not without hope that the Lord might have appeared, +and sent a little help. When I arrived I found that one of the +labourers had sold a few of his books, together with two which had +been given by another labourer on the 13th, for which he had received +7s. To this one of the labourers added 7s. 9d. This 14s. 9d. supplied +the most pressing necessities. When I came home I found 1s. in the +box at my house, and soon after received 5s. for a pair of fire +screens, which had been given for sale. There were also three baskets +of potatoes sent to the three different houses. A sack of potatoes +had been ordered, but the brother, who had been desired to bring +them, could not conveniently do so today, and thought, as this +present had been ordered from him, there would be no immediate need +of them; and Oh! how kind of the Lord to order it thus: for had he +brought them, the payment would have taken away the money which was +intended for the usual quantity of bread. But before the day was +over, the Lord helped still further. In the afternoon a gentleman +from Bath called at the Boys'-Orphan-House, and gave a cheque for 3l. +There was also 1s. given; 2s. 6d. came in for needle-work, and 5s. +6d. for things sold. Thus altogether 4l. 4s. 9d. has been sent by the +Lord this day. + +Nov. 17. Saturday. Today above 3l. was needed, and as only 15s. 6d. +had come in, we found it needful to determine to dispose of a few +articles of furniture which we conveniently could do without. One of +the labourers gave a good watch to be sold, which she had bought some +months since, there being then no time-piece in one of the houses. In +consideration of these articles to be sold, I took, for the present +necessities of the Orphans, 2l. 10s. of the money which had been put +by for the rent, to be replaced when these articles could be sold at +a suitable opportunity. Thus we were helped to the close of one more +week. + +Nov. 19. Today we were again in great need. There had come in only +7s. 6d. for needle-work. The Lord had, however, given to one of the +labourers a little money, of which he gave 15s., by means of which we +were helped through this day also. + +Nov. 20. Today our need was exceedingly great, but the Lord's help +was great also. I went to meet with the brethren and sisters as +usual. I found that 1l. would be needed to supply the necessities of +today, but 3s. only had come in. Just when we were going to pray, one +of the labourers came in, who, after prayer, gave 10s. Whilst we were +praying, another labourer came in, who had received 1l. Thus we had +1l. 13s.; even more, therefore, than was absolutely needed. + +Nov. 21. Never were we so reduced in funds as today. There was not a +single halfpenny in hand between the matrons of the three houses. +Nevertheless there was a good dinner, and, by managing so as to help +one another with bread, etc., there was a prospect of getting over +this day also; but for none of the houses had we the prospect of +being able to take in bread. When I left the brethren and sisters at +one o'clock, after prayer, I told them that we must wait for help, +and see how the Lord would deliver us at this time. I was sure of +help, but we were indeed straitened. When I came to Kingsdown, I felt +that I needed more exercise, being very cold; wherefore I went not +the nearest way home, but round by Clarenceplace. About twenty yards +from my house, I met a brother who walked back with me, and after a +little conversation gave me 10l. to be handed over to the brethren, +the deacons, towards providing the poor saints with coals, blankets +and warm clothing; also 5l. for the Orphans, and 5l. for the other +objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. The brother had +called twice while I was gone to the Orphan-Houses, and had I now +been one half minute later, I should have missed him. But the Lord +knew our need, and therefore allowed me to meet him. I sent off the +5l. immediately to the matrons. + +Nov. 23. The above-mentioned 5l., with an addition of 11s. 6d. which +had also come in, helped us through the expenses of yesterday and +today. + +Nov. 24. This again has been a very remarkable day. We had as little +in hand this morning as at any time, and yet several pounds were +needed. But God, who is rich in mercy, and whose word so positively +declares that none who trust in Him shall be confounded, has helped +us through this day also. While I was in prayer, about ten in the +morning, respecting the funds, I was informed that a gentleman had +called to see me. He came to inform me that a lady had ordered three +sacks of potatoes to be sent to the Orphan Houses. Never could they +have come more seasonably. This was an encouragement to me, to +continue to expect help. When I came to the prayer meeting about 12 +o'clock, I heard that 2s. had come in, also 1l. for a guitar, which +had been given for sale. The payment for this guitar had been +expected for many weeks. It had been mentioned among us, repeatedly, +that it might come just at a time, when we most needed it: and oh! +how true. Also the watch which had been given was sold for 2l. 10s. +But with all this we could not have put by the rents for this week, +amounting to 30s. One of the labourers, therefore, gave his watch to +the Orphan-fund under this condition, that should the Lord not enable +us before Dec. 21st to make up this deficiency, it should be sold, +but not otherwise, as he needs it in the Lord's service.--[A few days +after the Lord gave the means to put by the 30s., and 30s. besides +for the next week's rent.] Thus the Lord helped us through this day, +and with it brought us to the close of one more week. + +Nov. 25. Lord's-day. The Lord kindly remembers us before there is +absolute need. A sister who is going to leave Bristol, called on me +to bid me farewell, and gave me, in parting, 1l. 10s. for the +Orphans. It is remarkable, that almost every donation given within +the last four months and thirteen days, since our funds have been +low, has come from unexpected quarters, to make the hand of God so +much the more manifest. + +Nov. 26. Though there had come in yesterday 1l. 10s., yet that was +scarcely the half of what was needed this day. But the Lord knew our +circumstances, and, as He is wont to do, most unworthy as we are of +it, remembered our need. There was given 1l. this morning, and 1s. +had been put anonymously into the box at Gideon Chapel; and a lamp, +which had been given some time since, had been sold for 10s. Also 1s. +2d. came in for needlework. By means of these several little sums we +could meet all the demands of this day. + +Nov. 27. Yesterday afternoon came in 10s., and this morning, by the +disposal of some articles, which had been given for sale, 12s. This +furnished us with means to procure, for this day also, the necessary +supplies. + +Nov. 28. This is, perhaps, of all days the most remarkable as yet, so +far as it regards the funds. When I was in prayer this morning +respecting them, I was enabled firmly to believe that the Lord would +send help, though all seemed dark as to natural appearances. At 12 +o'clock I met as usual with the brethren and sisters for prayer. +There had come in only 1s., which was left last evening anonymously, +at the Infant Orphan-House, and which, except 2d., had already been +spent, on account of the great need. I heard also that an individual +had gratuitously cleaned the time-piece in the Infant Orphan-House, +and had offered to keep the timepieces of the three houses in repair. +Thus the Lord gave even in this a little encouragement, and a proof +that He is still mindful of us. On inquiry I found that there was +every thing needful for the dinner in all the three houses; but +neither in the Infant nor Boys' Orphan-Houses was there bread enough +for tea, nor money to buy milk. Lower we had never been, and, +perhaps, never so low. We gave ourselves now unitedly to prayer, +laying the case in simplicity before the Lord. Whilst in prayer there +was a knock at the door, and one of the sisters went out. After the +two brethren, who labour in the Orphan-Houses, and I had prayed +aloud, we continued for a while silently in prayer. As to myself, I +was lifting up my heart to the Lord to make a way for our escape, and +in order to know, if there were any other thing which I could do with +a good conscience, besides waiting on Him, so that we might have food +for the children. At last we rose from our knees. I said, "God will +surely send help." The words had not quite passed over my lips, when +I perceived a letter lying on the table, which had been brought +whilst we were in prayer. It was from my wife, containing another +letter from a brother with 10l. for the Orphans. The evening before +last I was asked by a brother whether the balance in hand for the +Orphans would be as great this time, when the accounts would be made +up, as the last time. My answer was, that it would be as great as the +Lord pleased. The next morning this brother was moved to remember the +Orphans, and to send today 10l., which arrived after I had left my +house, and which on account of our need was forwarded immediately to +me. Thus I was enabled to give 6l. 10s. for housekeeping, and to put +by 3l. 10s. for rent. + +The brother who sent the 10l. for the Orphans, sent likewise 10l. to +be divided between brother Craik and me, with the object of +purchasing new clothes for ourselves. + +Nov. 29. The Lord has greatly blessed our meetings for prayer. They +have been instrumental in leading us to much prayer for the children +in the Orphan-Houses, in the Day-Schools, and in the Sunday-School. +They have led us to prayer for ourselves, for the Day-School +Teachers, and for the Sunday-School Teachers, that grace may be given +to us so to walk before the children, and so to deal with them, as +that the Lord may be glorified by us. We have also often been led to +intercede for the believers with whom we are in fellowship, and for +the Church at large. We have especially prayed, that our work may +lead the church generally to a more simple confidence and trust in +the Lord. That these meetings have not been in vain, as regards the +procuring of funds, has been already sufficiently seen by the many +instances which have been recorded in the foregoing pages. Today, +however, we have had another particular proof of this. When we met I +found that 10s. had come in yesterday afternoon. When I returned home +I found 1l. had come in, and shortly after I received another 1l. In +the evening I received 50l., which was sent from Suffolk by a sister +who had often expressed how gladly she would contribute more largely +to the work which is in our hands, had she the means, and who just +now, in this our time of need, has obtained the means to carry out +the desire of her heart. I rejoice in the last donation particularly, +not because of the largeness of the sum, but because it enables me to +pay to my brethren and sisters in the Orphan-Houses the salary which +is due to them. For though they are willing to labour without any +remuneration, nevertheless "the labourer is worthy of his reward." +This donation also proves, that the Lord is willing even now, as +formerly, to send large sums. But I expect still larger. The same +sister who sent the 50l. for the Orphans, sent, at the same time, +30l. to be divided between brother Craik and me for our personal +expenses. How abundantly does the Lord care for us! Truly we serve a +kind Master! + +Dec. 5. Today there were again a few shillings needed, in the Boys' +Orphan-House. That which remained of the L50l. had been divided for +housekeeping in the three houses, and was now all spent in the Boys' +Orphan-House, and nearly also in the other two houses. The few +shillings which were needed in the Boys' Orphan-House, the Lord, +however, had previously provided by the little which had come in on +December 3 and 4. + +Dec. 6. This day our need was again as great as ever, but the +deliverance of the Lord was also as manifest as ever. No money had +come in, and I knew there would be some needed this morning in all +the three houses. That which was required to buy provisions for +today, was about 1l.; but there were also coals needed in two +houses, and two of the treacle-casks were empty. We gave ourselves, +as usual, to prayer. After prayer one of the labourers gave 1l. of +the salary which she had received a few days ago; another gave 6s., +and 4s. 6d. was taken out of the boxes. Thus we had 1l. 10s. 6d. to +divide, and therefore more than was absolutely needed; also one of +the labourers had ordered half a ton of coals to be sent to the Boys' +Orphan-House, for which he paid himself. + +This afternoon I received 100l. from a sister; 50l. for the Orphans, +and 50l. for the School--Bible--and Missionary-Fund. This same sister, +who earns her bread with her own hands, had given, on October 5, +1837, 50l. towards the Boys' Orphan-House, and gave for the +necessities of the poor saints, in August, 1838, 100l. more; for she +had been made willing to act out those precious exhortations: "Having +food and raiment let us be therewith content." "Sell that ye have, +and give alms; provide yourselves bags which wax not old, a treasure +in the heavens that faileth not, where no thief approacheth, neither +moth corrupteth." "Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, +where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and +steal: but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither +moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through +nor steal." Respecting the 50l. which has been given of this sum for +the School--Bible--and Missionary-Fund, it is worthy of remark, that we +would not order Reference Bibles till we had the means. We had +repeatedly prayed respecting this want of Bibles, and particularly +again this morning. It had been also much laid on our hearts today, +to request that the Lord would enable us to have the Report printed, +which we could not do, unless He first sent the means. Lastly, we had +also repeatedly asked Him to supply us so largely, if it were His +will, as that at the time of the public meetings we might be able to +speak again of abundance. For though for some months past the time +has been fixed for the public meetings, without any reference to the +state of the funds, nevertheless, it might have had the appearance, +that we had convened the brethren for the sake of telling them about +our poverty, and thus to induce them to give. + +Dec. 8, 1838. The Lord closes the third year of this part of the work +with blessings. Yesterday was sent 24 yards of flannel, and today +were taken out of the box in the Boys' Orphan-House a 5l. note and +3d. Also 2s. was given, and 1l. besides. + +Dec. 11, 12, and 13. On the evenings of these three days there were +public meetings, at which I gave an account of the Lord's dealing +with us in reference to the Orphan-Houses and the other objects of +the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. As the work, and particularly +that of the Orphan-Houses, was begun for the benefit of the church at +large, it appeared well to us, that from time to time it should be +publicly stated how the Lord had dealt with us in reference to it; +and as on Dec. 9th the third year had been completed, since the +commencement of the Orphan work, this seemed to be a suitable time +for having these meetings. + +Should any one suppose, in reading the plain details of the trials +through which we passed during the four months previous to Dec. 9, +1838, respecting the Orphan-Houses, that I have been disappointed as +it regards my expectations, as far as the funds are concerned: my +answer is, that the reverse is the case. For straits were expected. +Long before the trials came, I had more than once stated publicly, +that answers to prayer, in the time of need,--the manifestation of +the hand of God, stretched out for our help,--was just the very end +for which the Institution was established. + +I further state, that the Orphans have never lacked any thing. Had I +had thousands of pounds in hand, they would have fared no better than +they have; for they have always had good nourishing food, the +necessary articles of clothing, etc. + +It is now (namely on Dec. 10, 1838) four years and nine months since +brother Craik and I established the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. +The reasons which we had for doing so were, that thus a testimony +might be borne that the children of God need not to go to unbelievers +to ask them for money; nor require the patronage of the great men of +this world in the Lord's work; and that, further, believers generally +might be stirred up, to renounce their alliance with the world in the +management and promotion of religious objects, and that, lastly, it +might be seen, that, without contracting debts, such objects can be +carried on. + +Painful as it was, and as it still is, to us, to be obliged to differ +from so many of our brethren, in these particulars, nevertheless we +were called upon to work without them, if we could not conscientiously +work with them. May the Lord grant, that the eyes of many of His children +may be opened, so that they may seek, in all spiritual things, to be +separated from unbelievers, (2 Cor. vi. 14--18), and to do God's work +according to God's mind! + +I notice briefly the following particulars respecting the first three +objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. 1. There is at +present (in December, 1838) a Sunday School supported by it, which +contains four hundred and sixty-three children. This part of the work +calls for particular thanksgiving; for during these last eighteen +months the number of the children has been nearly three times as +great as it used to be. Five of the scholars have been converted +within the last two years, and are now in fellowship with the church, +and three of them are teachers in the school. 2. There is in +connection with the Institution an Adult-school, in which, since the +commencement of the work, above 120 adults have been instructed, and +in which at present twelve are taught to read. 3. The Institution has +entirely supported, since its commencement, several Day-schools for +poor children, and within the last two years six of such: three for +boys, and three for girls.--The number of all the children that have +had schooling in the Day-schools through the medium of the +Institution, since its formation, amounts to 1534; the number of +those at present in the six Day. Schools is 342. 4. During the last +two years there have been circulated, 1884 copies of the Scriptures +in connexion with the Institution, and since the beginning of the +work, March 5, 1834, five thousand and seventy-eight copies. 5. For +Missionary purposes have been laid out L74. 18s. 4d. 6. The total of +the income for the first three objects, during the last two years, +was L1129. 13s. 1d. The total of the expenses L1111. 13s. 7 1/2d. + +There are, at present, 86 Orphans in the three houses, i. e. 31 in +the Girls'-Orphan-House, 31 in the Infant-Orphan-House, and 24 in the +Boys'-Orphan-House. + +The whole number of Orphans, who have been under our care, from April +11, 1836, to Dec. 9, 1838, amounts to 110. + +God's blessing has most manifestly rested upon this part of the work. +For, 1. Without any one having been asked for any thing by us, the +sum of L2111 5s. 4 1/2d. has been given to us, entirely as the result +of prayer to God. + +2. Besides this, also, many articles of clothing, furniture, +provisions, etc. 3. Without our solicitation three medical gentlemen, +(one for each house), have, up to Dec. 9, 1838, kindly given their +attendance and medicines gratuitously. + +4. The children have been, on the whole, in good health, and many of +them have greatly improved as to their health, since they have been +with us. 5. Though most of them had been brought up in a very +different manner from what one could desire, yet God has constrained +them, on the whole, to behave exceedingly well, so much so that it +has attracted the attention of all observers. This can be ascribed +only to the good hand of God. 6. There are a few among them, +respecting whom we have a comfortable assurance that they care about +their souls. 7. There is not one of those who have died, of whom we +are without hope, as it regards their eternal welfare; but respecting +two of them we have especial reason to rejoice. The elder of the two, +Harriet Culliford, about twelve years of age when she died, had been +for many months wasting away in consumption. She was, almost during +the whole time of her illness, completely careless about the things +of God; nothing seemed to make any impression upon her, though a well +behaved child in other respects. About a fortnight before her +departure, she was brought to know the Lord, gave the fullest +evidence, that could be given in her circumstances, of a real change +of heart, and departed full of joy at the prospect of being with the +Lord, though previously she had been very desirous to be restored +again. The younger, Leah Culliford, (both of them of a very +consumptive family), fell asleep in Jesus on Sept. 11, 1838. She was +but little more than eight years of age; but many weeks before her +death she gave evidence to those who were placed over her of a change +of heart, and of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. + +The total of the income for the Orphans, from Dec. 9, 1836, to Dec. +9, 1838, has amounted to L1341. 4s. 7d. the total of' the expenses to +L1664. 4s. 0 3/4d. There was two years ago a balance of L373. 4s. 8 +1/4d. in hand, and now the balance is L50. 5s. 3d. + +Dec. 16. There was a paper anonymously put into the box at Bethesda +Chapel, containing 4l. 10s. In the paper was written "For the Rent of +the Orphan-Houses, from Dec. 10 to Dec. 31, 1838. 'O taste and see +that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in Him!" In +order that the reader may be able to enter into the value of this +donation, I would request him to read over once more, what I wrote +under "Sept. 29 of this year." [The individual who gave this 4l. 10s. +for the rent of the Orphan-Houses for the first three weeks after the +public meetings, at which the matter about the rent, for the +instruction of the brethren, was fully stated, continued for three +years, up to Dec. 10, 1841, to give regularly, but anonymously, 1l. +10s. a week for the same purpose, which was exactly the sum required +every week for the rent of those three houses. Thus the Lord rewarded +our faithfulness, in carrying out the light which He had given us. +But the chief blessing, resulting from this circumstance, I consider +to be this, that several brethren, who earn their bread by the labour +of their hands, have learned through this circumstance, that it is +the will of the Lord they should lay by their rent weekly. I beseech +those brethren who are not pursuing this course, to do so, and they +will soon prove by experience the benefit of acting on Scriptural +principles even as it regards this life.] + +Dec. 17. Today eleven brethren and sisters were proposed for +fellowship. The Lord still uses us as instruments. Truly, our labour +in the Lord is not in vain! + +Dec. 20. As the expenses for the Orphans have been above 47l. within +the last six days, and as but little above 13l. has come in, and as +the money for printing the Report had to be kept back, in order that +we might not be in debt, we were again today very low in funds, +though it is but six days since the public meetings. As I knew that +tomorrow several pounds would be needed to supply the matrons, I gave +myself this morning to prayer. About a quarter of an hour afterwards +I received 3l., the payment of a legacy, left by a sister, who fell +asleep in Jesus several months since, in Ireland. Besides this I +received from the brother, through whom the legacy was paid, 2l. 10s. +for the Orphan-Fund. With this 5l. 10s. I hope to be able to meet the +expenses of tomorrow. + +I observe here that it might have been naturally supposed that every +heart would be touched, through what was publicly stated about the +remarkable manner in which the Lord had provided for us for nearly +150 days, and that consequently an abundance of means would have come +in. To this is to be added, that 50l. 5s. 3d. was in hand on Dec. 10, +and that therefore it seemed not likely that we should be in need; +and yet, by Dec. 20, we were again so poor, that there was nothing to +meet the expenses of the next day, as has just been related. All this +came not unawares upon me and my fellow-labourers; for we had been +taught to look off from all creature expectations to the living God. +It was on this account that, many times in our prayer meetings during +November and the beginning of December, we were led to ask the Lord, +not to allow us to expect an influx of means because, for the benefit +of the Church, our circumstances would be made known at the public +meetings. And how kind was it of the Lord to give us prayer about +this, and thus to prepare us beforehand; for had we leaned upon +natural expectations, we should have been surely disappointed, as +only six days after the meetings we were as poor as ever. By the +grace of God we are so acquainted with the heart of our Father, that +we speak not about these things to excite the compassion of our +fellow saints, for we have learned to lean upon God only; but we make +known His dealings with us, that others may be led "to taste and see +that the Lord is good," and to put their trust in Him. + +The sister who left the 3l. for the Orphans, as just alluded to, also +left 3l. for the funds of the other objects, 20l. to be divided +between brother Craik and me, and 3l. for the poor saints. + +Dec. 22. A solemn day. I received today the information from my +father that my brother died on October 7th. When I saw him in April +this year, he was living in open sin, and in disunion with my father. +I cannot learn that his end was different from his life, so that I +have no comfort in his death.--Of all the trials that can befall a +believer, the death of an unconverted near relative seems to me one +of the greatest. "Shall not the judge of all the earth do right?" +must be the stay of the believer at such a time, and, by grace, it is +my stay now. I know that the Lord is glorified in my brother, +whatever his end has been: whether in his last hours, like the thief, +on the cross, he was saved, or whether he died in sin and unbelief; +yet I do, as to myself, desire from my heart to adore that grace +which plucked me as a brand out of the burning, many years ago.--May +the Lord make this event a lasting blessing to me, especially in +leading me to earnestness in prayer for my father! + +Dec. 26. From the 21st to this day several small donations had come +in for the Orphans, so that we were supplied as we needed. Today +there was ten-pence left, after the day's expenses had been met. One +hour after the Lord kindly appeared again. 5l. was sent by Q. Q. This +money came, just after I had prayed for means. + +Dec. 27. Today came in 2l. 12s. 6d., whereby the Lord has again +helped us to meet the probable expenses of tomorrow. + +Dec. 28. This evening the Lord kindly sent further help, when we were +again destitute of the means of providing for tomorrow. I received +20l. (half for the Orphan-Fund, and half for the other funds), with +Ecclesiastes ix. 10: "Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with +thy might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor +wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest." + +Dec. 29. A sister, having felt herself particularly stirred up about +the Orphans, as she writes, sent this evening 7l. five pounds from +herself, and 2l. which had been sent from the EAST INDIES. To the +Lord this is to be ascribed, who, in answer to our prayers, makes +these impressions on the hearts of His children. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1838. + + + +1. As to the church. + +68 brethren and sisters we found in fellowship, when brother Craik +and I came to Bristol. + +458 have been admitted into fellowship since, so that the total +number would be + +526 had there been no changes. But, + +31 have fallen asleep. + +28 are under church discipline, which is the total number of all the +cases of separation from communion within these six years and seven +months. + +36 have left Bristol + +26 have left us, but are still in Bristol. Only 26 within six years +and seven months! + +Total 121. There are therefore only 405 at present in fellowship with +us. 61 have been added during the last year, of whom 36 have been +brought among us to the knowledge of the truth. + +II. As to my temporal supplies + +The Lord has been pleased to give me during the past year: + +1. By the Freewill Offerings through the boxes L151 6s. 8d. + +2. By presents in money from believers in and out of Bristol L141 +18s. 0d. + +3. By money, through family connexion L40 0s. 0d. + +4. By presents in clothes, provisions, etc., which were worth to me, +at least L12 0s. 0d. + +We have been living for six months, half free of rent whereby we have +saved at least L5 0s. 0d. + +Altogether L350 4s. 8d. + + + +During no period of my life had I such need of means, on account of +my own long illness and that of my dear wife, and on account of' the +many and particular calls for means as during the past year; but also +during no period of my life has the Lord so richly supplied me. +Truly, it must be manifest to all that I have served a most kind +Master, during this year also, and that, even for this life, it is by +far the best thing to seek to act according to the mind of the Lord, +as to temporal things. + +January 1st, 2nd, and 3rd, 1830. We have had three especial church +prayer meetings these three days. The year commenced with mercies. In +the first hour of the year there came in for the Orphans 2l. 7s., +which was given after our usual prayer meeting on December 31, which +this time lasted from seven in the evening till after midnight. + +Jan. 11. Since December 20, came in several donations for the +Orphans, so that we were supplied, before that which we had in hand +was quite gone. On the seventh, however, all our money was again +expended, when a brother, from the neighbourhood of London, who, is +staying here, gave me 10l. Today, when this 10l. was given out, I +received from London 3l. 7s., and 4s. besides. Thus the Lord, as our +need is, sends help, and all in answer to prayer, without our asking +any one. + +Jan. 17. Since the 11th 22 small donations have again come in, by +which we have been helped thus far. This afternoon all which was in +hand was given for housekeeping, and I was again penniless. The Lord, +however, was mindful of this, and in the evening two sovereigns were +left anonymously at my house. In the paper was written: "The enclosed +are for the use of the Orphan-Houses, from J. H., who thinks he ought +to do something for the Institution." J. H. will have in this a proof +that the Lord touched his heart to give the money, because there was +not a penny in hand for those who are the especial care of Him who is +the "Father of the fatherless." + +Jan. 20. Ten small donations have come in since the 17th, which have +enabled us to provide what was needed for the last three days, and +also for today.--For some time past it has appeared to me that the +words "Ye have the poor with you always, and whensoever ye will ye +may do them good," which the Lord spoke to His disciples, who were +themselves very poor, imply that the children of God, as such, have +power with God to bring temporal blessings upon poor saints or poor +unbelievers, through the instrumentality of prayer. Accordingly I +have been led to ask the Lord for means to assist poor saints; and at +different times He has stirred up His children to intrust me with +sums both large and small, for that especial object; or has, by some +means or other, put money at my disposal, which I might so use. In +like manner I had been asking again for means a few days since, to be +able more extensively to assist the poor saints in communion with us, +as just now many of them are not merely tried by the usual temporal +difficulties arising from its being winter, but especially from the +high price of bread. And now this evening the Lord has given me the +answer to my prayer. When I came home from the meeting, I found a +brother at my house who offered to give me 10l. a week, for twelve +weeks, towards providing the poor saints with coals and needful +articles of clothing, but chiefly with bread. [Accordingly this +brother sent me two days afterwards 120l.,--whereby very many, +especially poor widows, were greatly assisted, chiefly with flour and +bread. This money just lasted till the price of bread was reduced +from 9 1/2d. to 7 1/2d. Thus, for several weeks, about 150 quarterns +of bread were distributed weekly, besides what was given in flour, +coals, and clothes. I have mentioned this circumstance as an +encouragement to those who either have little or nothing at all to +give to poor persons, and who yet have a desire to give; and to those +who have means, but whose means are not adequate to relieve all the +demands made upon them. Had we more grace to plead the words of our +Lord, above referred to, we should receive far more from Him to meet +the necessities around us.] + +Jan. 22. A brother formerly an officer in the navy, Who for Jesus' +sake has given up his rank and pay, gave three silver table spoons, +three silver forks, and two teaspoons, to be sold for the benefit of +the Orphans. The produce of them, with 1l. 5s. which has come in +besides, enabled us to meet the expenses of today and tomorrow. + +Jan. 26. Saturday. The need of the 24th, 25th, and of today was +supplied, partly, by the little that had been left on the 23rd; and +partly, by five small donations, by 9s. for the children's +needlework, and by 12s. which had come in by the sale of two old silk +dresses, which had been given for sale. Now, when we were again +penniless, 6s. was given me, just after I had been praying for means. + +Jan. 28. Monday morning. We are now quite reduced as to means for the +Orphans. The little which is in hand has been put by for rent. How +the Lord will help us through this day, I know not; but I have faith +in God. He will help us, though I know not how. By God's help I +purpose not to take a single penny of what is in hand, because it is +due for rent.--This morning and afternoon came in from one individual +4s. 6d., and from a sister, who earns her bread by needlework, 1l. +There was also 1l. 0s. 10d. taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, which our need had led us to open. Thus we were helped +through the day, and have 1l. left for tomorrow. + +Jan. 29. The 1l. which was left helped us through this day; but in +the Boys'-Orphan-House were no means to take in bread. In the evening +eight small loaves were sent by a sister who could not possibly know +our need, and thus we were supplied. + +Jan, 30. A little while after I had been in prayer this morning for +means for the Orphans, brother T. brought a silver watch and 5s., +which had been given last evening. Also, still further, came in this +morning five yards of Indian muslin, a zephyr scarf, a muslin dress, +and a gold locket, to be sold. About two hours afterwards was sent 1l. + +The individual who last evening gave the silver watch and 5s. for the +Orphans, called on me today. She is a servant, who in the house of +her master found the first part of this Narrative soon after the +publication of the first edition, which the Lord used as the means of +her conversion. [She fell asleep in Jesus, after having been 36 years +in fellowship with us.] + +Jan. 31. There came in this morning 2s. 6d. for the Orphans. This, +with 1l. in hand, and 10s. which one of the labourers contributed, +was sufficient for this day's necessities. + +Feb. 1. There is no money in hand for the Orphans. I am waiting on +God. Just when Brother T. had come to tell me that the need for this +day would be 19s. 6d., one of the labourers in the work came and gave +me 1l. + +Feb. 2. There are again no means in hand. One of the labourers gave +1l., but I know not whether 1l. will be sufficient for the +necessities of this day. This I do know, however, that the Lord will +supply us with more, should more be needed. When I met with the +brethren and sisters for prayer, one of the labourers gave his watch, +under the condition that 1l., which was needed besides that which we +had in hand, should be taken from the rent money which had been put +by, till it could be replaced; and, if otherwise, that the watch +should be sold at the end of the quarter. Just as we had separated, a +sovereign was brought to me, which had been sent to my house since I +had left it. This was taken instead of the one which had been +advanced upon the watch, and thus a speedy answer was granted to our +prayers. We have now been brought to the close of one more week. + +Feb. 3. Lord's day. A sister sent from her sick bed this evening 2l. +for the Orphans, with Ecclesiastes ix. 10. Thus the Lord has supplied +our need for tomorrow. + +Feb. 4. This afternoon came in two pounds more from the grandmother +of two of the Orphans, in answer to prayer, and very seasonably, as +the coals in one house are quite out, and nearly so in the other two. + +Feb. 5. Today came in 12s., which supplied the necessities of this +day. + +Feb. 6. Only 10s. 6d. was needed for today, which one of the +labourers gave. + +Feb. 7. This day has been one of the most remarkable days as it +regards the Funds. There was no money in hand, I was waiting upon +God. I had asked him repeatedly, but no supplies came. Brother T. +called between 11 and 12 o'clock, to tell me that about 1l. 2s. would +be needed, to take in bread for the three houses, and to meet the +other expenses; but we had only 2s. 9d., which yesterday had been +taken out of the boxes in the Orphan-Houses. He went to Clifton to +make arrangements for the reception of the three orphans of our +sister Loader, who fell asleep on the 4th; for though we have no +funds in hand, the work goes on, and our confidence is not +diminished. I therefore requested him to call on his way back from +Clifton, to see whether the Lord might have sent any money in the +mean time. When he came I had received nothing, but one of the +labourers, having 5s. of his own, gave it. It was now four o'clock. I +knew not how the sisters had got through the day. Just before I went +out to preach, 5s. was brought to my house, which I took as a token +for good. I had been asking the Lord for a passage of the Word to +speak from this evening, and at last was directed to Matt. vi. 19-34, +a subject most applicable to our circumstances. After the meeting was +over, I went to the Girls'-Orphan-House, to meet with the brethren +for prayer, and to give the 5s. which I had received, and to see what +could be done. When I arrived there, I found that a box had come for +me from Barnstaple. The carriage was paid, else there would have been +no money to pay for it. (See how the Lord's hand is in the smallest +matters!) The box was opened, and it contained, in a letter from a +sister, 10l., of which 8l. was for the Orphans, and 2l. for the Bible +Fund; from brethren at Barnstaple, 2l. 11s. 2d.; and from another +brother 5s. Besides this, there were in the box 4 yards of merino, 3 +pairs of new shoes, 2 pairs of new socks: also six books for sale. +Likewise a gold pencil-case, 2 gold rings, 2 gold drops of ear-rings, +a necklace, and a silver pencil-case. On inquiry, how the sisters had +been carried through the day, I found it thus: everything was in the +houses which was needed for dinner. After dinner a lady from +Thornbury came and bought one of my Narratives and one of the +Reports, and gave 3s. besides. About five minutes afterwards the +baker came to the Boys'-Orphan-House. The matron of the +Girls'-Orphan-House seeing him, went immediately with the 6s. 6d. +which she had just received, (to prevent his being sent away, as +there was no money in hand at the Boys'-Orphan-House,) and bought +bread to the amount of 4s. 6d. The two remaining shillings, with the +little which was in hand, served to buy bread for the Girls'-Orphan-House. +By the donations sent in the box, I was enabled to give a rich supply +to the matrons before the close of the day. + +How sweet to see our Father thus caring for us! To a person who has +spiritual eyes, what a proof is one such day of the most particular +providence of God! And we have had many such days. + +Feb. 8. Today the Lord sent still further help, which is remarkable +for two reasons in particular. First, we had decided yesterday upon +receiving the three little Loaders, though we were so low as to +funds. Thus the Lord sent means on their behalf. Secondly, we were +brought so low yesterday, and our faith was so much tried, in order +that now again the abundance of supplies out of our loving Father's +hand, might be so much the sweeter. A sister in the neighbourhood of +London sent today in money 1l. 5s., and the following articles for +sale; 3 purses, 1 mourning brooch, 1 amber ditto, 1 amethyst stud, 1 +cameo ditto, I pair of coral ear rings, 1 coral cross, 1 ring set +with a diamond and six rubies, 1 ditto pearl and garnet, 1 ditto +garnet, 1 ruby cross, 4 necklaces, and 148 pamphlets and tracts. Also +several articles of clothing for the children. + +Feb. 13. Since the 8th, five donations, amounting to 9l. 9s., had +come in. This afternoon I paid out the last money which we had in +hand, and in giving it to brother T. said, we have now again to look +to the Lord for further supplies. This evening 5l. was given to me, +which had come in under the folio wing circumstances:-- + +A gentleman and lady visited the Orphan-Houses, and met at the +Boys'-Orphan-House two ladies who were likewise visiting. One of the +ladies said to the matron of the Boys'-Orphan-House: "Of course, you +cannot carry on these institutions without a good stock of funds." +The gentleman, turning to the matron, said, "Have you a good stock?" +She replied: "Our funds are deposited in a bank which cannot break." +The tears came into the eyes of the inquiring lady. The gentleman, on +leaving, gave to the master of the boys 5l., which came in when I had +not a penny in hand. + +Feb. 16. Yesterday came in 17s. 6d. for the Orphans, which, with what +was taken out of the boxes today, helped us through; and thus we have +been brought to the close of one more week. + +March 5. Up to this day, since Feb. 16, the supplies for the Orphans +have come in so seasonably, that we were able comfortably to meet all +the demands. Today, however, I knew that there would be again several +pounds required, as, besides the daily provisions, there were coals +needed, the treacle-casks in two houses were empty, and there was but +5s. in hand. I gave myself therefore to prayer this morning. WHILST I +WAS IN PRAYER, Q. Q. sent a cheque for 7l. 10s. Thus the Lord has +again most seasonably helped us out of our difficulty. There came in +still further this day, 1l. 19s. 2d., by the sale of some articles, +which had been given for the benefit of the Orphans. + +March 6. For some time past the minds of several brethren among us, +as well as that of brother Craik and my own, had been much exercised +respecting certain questions connected with points of church order +and discipline, on account of which brother Craik and I were absent +from Bristol during the last two weeks, to give ourselves to prayer +and consideration respecting those points. Since our return we have +had, these last three evenings, meetings with the saints, before whom +we stated the result to which we had been led, after prayer and +examination of the Scriptures. The following is an abstract of what +was stated at those meetings, which I give here, as this matter forms +an important period in my experience about church matters; but the +abstract will be of little use, except the reader consider carefully +the passages to which reference is made. + + + +I.--QUESTIONS RESPECTING THE ELDERSHIP. + + + +(1) How does it appear to be the mind of God, that, in every Church, +there should be recognized Elders? + +Ans. From the following passages compared together, Matth. xxiv. 45, +Luke xii. 42. From these passages we learn that some are set by the +Lord Himself in the office of Rulers and Teachers, and that this +office (in spite of the fallen state of the Church) should be in +being even down to the close of the present dispensation. +Accordingly, we find from Acts xiv. 23, xx. 17, Tit. i. 5, and 1 Pet. +v. 1, that soon after the saints had been converted, and had +associated together in a Church character, Elders were appointed to +take the rule over them and to fulfil the office of under-shepherds. + +This must not be understood as implying, that, when believers are +associated in Church fellowship, they ought to elect Elders according +to their own will, whether the Lord may have qualified persons or +not; but rather that such should wait upon God, that He Himself would +be pleased to raise up such as may be qualified for teaching and +ruling in His church. + +(2) How do such come into office? + +Ans. By the appointment of the Holy Ghost, Acts xx. 28. + +(3) How may this appointment be made known to the individuals called +to the office, and to those amongst whom they may be called to labour? + +Ans. By the secret call of the Spirit, 1 Tim. iii. 1, confirmed by +the possession of the requisite qualifications, 1 Tim. iii. 2-7, Tit. +i. 6-9, and by the Lord's blessing resting upon their labours, 1 Cor. +ix. 2. + +In 1 Cor. ix. 2, Paul condescends to the weakness of some, who were +in danger of being led away by those factious persons who questioned +his authority. As an Apostle--appointed by the express word of the +Lord--he needed not such outward confirmation. But if he used his +success as an argument in confirmation of his call, how much more may +ordinary servants of the Lord Jesus employ such an argument, seeing +that the way, in which they are called for the work, is such as to +require some outward confirmation. + +(4) Is it incumbent upon the saints to acknowledge such and to submit +to them in the Lord? + +Ans. Yes. See 1 Cor. xvi. 15, 16, 1 Thess. v. 12, 13, Heb. xiii. 7, +17, and 1 Tim. v. 17. In these passages obedience to pastoral +authority is clearly enjoined. + +II.--Ought matters of discipline to be finally settled by the Elders +in private, or in the presence of the Church, and as the act of the +whole body? + +Ans. (1) Such matters are to be finally settled in the presence of +the Church. This appears from Matth. xviii. 17, 1 Cor. v. 4, 5, 2 +Cor. ii. 6-8, 1 Tim. v. 20. (2) Such matters are to be finally +settled as the act of the whole body, Matth. xviii. 17, 18. In this +passage the act of exclusion is spoken of as the act of the whole +body. 1 Cor. v. 4, 5, 7, 12, 13. In this passage Paul gives the +direction, respecting the exercise of discipline, in such a way as to +render the whole body responsible: verse 7, "Purge out the old +leaven, that ye maybe a new lump;" and verse 13, "Therefore put away +from among yourselves that wicked person." From 2 Cor. ii. 6-8, we +learn that the act of exclusion was not the act of the Elders only, +but of the Church. "Sufficient to such a man is this punishment +(rather, public censure) which was inflicted of many." From verse 8 +we learn that the act of restoration was to be a public act of the +brethren: "Wherefore I beseech you that ye would confirm (rather +ratify by a public act) your love towards him." + +As to the reception of brethren into fellowship, this is an act of +simple obedience to the Lord, both on the part of the Elders and the +whole Church. We are bound and privileged to receive all those who +make a credible profession of faith in Christ, according to that +Scripture, "Receive ye one another, as Christ also received us, to +the glory of God." Rom. xv. 7. + +III.--When should Church acts (such as acts of reception, restoration, +exclusion, &c.) be attended to? + +Ans. It cannot be expressly proved from Scripture, whether such acts +were attended to at the meeting for the breaking of bread, or at any +other meeting; therefore this is a point on which, if different +churches differ, mutual forbearance ought to be exercised. The way in +which such matters have hitherto been managed amongst us has been by +the Church coming together on a week-evening. Before we came to +Bristol we had been accustomed to this mode, and, finding nothing in +Scripture against it, we continued the practice. But, after prayer, +and more careful consideration of this point, it has appeared well to +us that such acts should be attended to on the Lord's days, when the +saints meet together for the breaking of bread. We have been induced +to make this alteration by the following reasons:-- + +(1) This latter mode prevents matters from being delayed. There not +being a sufficiency of matter for a meeting on purpose every week, it +has sometimes happened, that, what would better have been stated to +the Church at once, has been kept back from the body for some weeks. +Now, it is important that what concerns the whole Church, should be +made known as soon as possible to those who are in fellowship, that +they may act accordingly. Delay, moreover, seems inconsistent with +the pilgrim-character of the people of God. + +(2) More believers can be present on the Lord's days than can attend +on week evenings. The importance of this reason will appear from +considering how everything which concerns the Church should be known +to as many as possible. For how can the saints pray for those who may +have to be excluded,--how can they sympathize in cases of peculiar +trial,--and how can they rejoice and give thanks on account of those +who may be received or restored, unless they are made acquainted with +the facts connected with such cases? + +(3) A testimony is thus given that all who break bread are Church +members. By attending to Church acts in the meeting for breaking of +bread, we show that we make no difference between receiving into +fellowship at the Lord's supper, and into Church membership; but that +the individual who is admitted to the Lord's table is therewith also +received to all the privileges, trials, and responsibilities of +Church membership. + +(4) There is a peculiar propriety in acts of reception, restoration +and exclusion being attended to when the saints meet together for the +breaking of bread, as, in that ordinance especially, we show forth +our fellowship with each other. + +Objections answered. + +(1) This alteration has the appearance of changeableness. + +Reply. Such an objection would apply to any case in which increased +light led to any improvement, and is, therefore, not to be regarded. +It would be an evil thing if there were any change respecting the +foundation truths of the Gospel; but the point in question is only a +matter of Church order. + +(2) More time may thus be required than it would be well to give to +such a purpose on the Lord's day. + +Reply. As, according to this plan, Church business will be attended +to every Lord's day, it is more than probable that the meetings will +be thereby prolonged for a few minutes only; but should circumstance +required it, a special meeting may still be appointed during the +week, for all who break bread with us. This, however, would only be +needful, provided the matters to be brought before the brethren were +to require more time than could be given to them at the breaking of +bread. + +N.B. (1) Should any persons be present who do not break bread with +us, they may be requested to withdraw, whenever such points require +to be stated, as it would not be well to speak of in the presence of +unbelievers. + +(2) As there are two places in which the saints meet for the breaking +of bread, the matters connected with Church acts must be brought out +at each place. + + + +IV.--QUESTIONS RELATIVE TO THE LORD'S SUPPER. + + + +(1) How frequently ought the breaking of bread to be attended to? + +Ans. Although we have no express command respecting the frequency of +its observance, yet the example of the apostles and of the first +disciples would lead us to observe this ordinance every Lord's day. +Acts xx. 7. + +(2) What ought to be the character of the meeting at which the saints +are assembled for the breaking of bread? + +Ans. As in this ordinance we show forth our common participation in +all the benefits of our Lord's death, and our union to Him and to +each other (1 Cor. x. 16, 17,) opportunity ought to be given for the +exercise of the gifts of teaching or exhortation, and communion in +prayer and praise. Rom. xii. 4--8, Eph. iv. 11--16. The manifestation +of our common participation in each other's gifts cannot be fully +given at such meetings, if the whole meeting is, necessarily, +conducted by one individual. This mode of meeting does not however +take off from those, who have the gifts of teaching or exhortation, +the responsibility of edifying the church, as opportunity may be +offered. + +(3) Is it desirable that the bread should be broken at the Lord's +Supper by one of the Elders, or should each individual of the body +break it for himself? + +Ans. Neither way can be so decidedly proved from Scripture, that we +are warranted in objecting to the other as positively unscriptural, +yet-- + +(1) The letter of Scripture seems rather in favour of its being done +by each brother and sister, 1 Cor. x. 16, 17. "The bread which we +break." + +(2) Its being done by each of the disciples, is more fitted to +express that we all, by our sins, have broken the body of our Lord. + +(3) By attending to the ordinance in this way, we manifest our +freedom from the common error that the Lord's supper must be +administered by some particular individual, possessed of what is +called a ministerial character, instead of being an act of social +worship and obedience. + +[Before brother Craik and I left Bristol for the consideration of the +above points, things wore a gloomy appearance. A separation in the +church seemed to be unavoidable. But God had mercy, and pitied us. He +was pleased to give us not merely increased light, but showed us also +how to act, and gave us a measure of wisdom, grace and spiritual +courage for acting. The clouds were dispelled, and peace was restored +in the church.] + +While I was away from Bristol, Samuel Loader, a little orphan boy, +died, after a fortnight's residence in the house, and only three +weeks after his mother's death. The brethren in the Boys-Orphan-House +consider him to have died in the faith. + +March 16. Saturday. By the good hand of the Lord we are brought to +the close of one more week. I have been able to meet all the current +expenses for the Orphans, and to pay, besides this, 10l. for +salaries. Thus a part of what has been due for several weeks to my +dear fellow-labourers is defrayed. I have especially prayed within +the last ten days that the Lord would be pleased to give me the means +for this. 2s. 8 1/2d. I have left. + +March 18. Monday. Last evening 5l. came in with Eccles. ix. 10. Thus +we were again enabled to supply all the necessities of this day. + +Pause a few moments, dear reader! Consider how seasonably the Lord +sends the supplies! Not once does He forget us! Not once is our need +only half supplied! Not once do His supplies come too late! Dear +reader, if you have not the like experience of the Lord's watchful +care, Oh taste and see that the Lord is good! + +March 20. The need of the 18th and 19th was supplied by the 5l. which +had come in on the 18th. Today we were again poor and needy, +therefore the Lord thought on us, and sent us 3l. l6s. 1 1/2d. + +March 22. Some trinkets which had been given, and 12s. which was in +hand, supplied the need of today. Yesterday were sent six sacks of +potatoes. We were not able to lay in a stock last autumn (as we had +done the two previous autumns) on account of want of means, but in no +previous year have we had so many sent. + +March 23. Today I received a letter from brother T., who is on +account of his health in Devonshire, to inform me that a heavy gold +chain, a ring set with ten brilliants, a pair of gold bracelets, and +2l. have been given to him. He gave a Report to a brother, who, +having read it, was thereby stirred up to prayer, and knowing that +his believing sister possessed these trinkets, he asked the Lord to +incline her heart to give them up for the benefit of our Orphans, +which she soon after did. By means of these donations I am able both +to meet the remaining expenses of this week, and also to pay 15l., +which still remains due on account of the salaries. My fellow-labourers +not only never ask me for any thing, but are willing to part with money, +or any thing else in the hour of need; nevertheless, I had asked the Lord +about this point frequently, and He has now given me my request, whereof +I am glad. I received also this afternoon 5l. 10s., besides a number of +things to be disposed of for the Orphans. + +March 24. The Lord has again kindly opened His liberal hand today, +and given us 6l. 10s. Thus we have wherewith to meet the necessities +of tomorrow in the Orphan-Houses. + +From March 24 to April 7, came in about sixty small donations. This, +with the produce of the sale of the trinkets, supplied all our need +for the Orphans. + +April 7. Our funds were now again spent, except 15s., though three +days ago above 30l. had come in; therefore the Lord has sent in again +this day several contributions, altogether 6l. 5s. + +April 8. The money which came in yesterday was sent off today for +housekeeping in the three different houses, and when I was now again +left penniless, there came in 2l. 6s. 10d. + +April 9. The 2l. 6s. 10d. was given out today for housekeeping, and I +am once more penniless.--A few hours after I had written this, there +was given to me by a brother 2l. 10s. When I received this money, I +was at the same time informed of the death of one of our sisters, a +widow, whose child we can receive. + +April 10. Today was sent anonymously from the country 5l. In the +evening I received still further 1l. l6s. 6d. + +April 11. It is three years today since the first Orphans were +received. Good indeed has the Lord been to us during these three +years! We have lacked nothing! Again He has sent this day, in a +remarkable manner, 5l., with the following letter, addressed to a +brother: + +"My dear Friend, enclosed are 5l. for the Orphan-Asylum, the history +of which is rather interesting. We have a servant who lived some +years ago as kitchen-maid in a noble family (i. e. the master a +wealthy member of Parliament, the mistress an Earl's daughter.) No +perquisites were allowed; but the individual in question acted on the +same principle as her fellow-servants, and sold kitchen-stuff for her +own benefit, which she thinks might amount to 4l.; and therefore she +believes that 5l. would fully repay principal and interest. This +money is of course due to her former master and mistress, with whom I +have had several interviews on the subject. They were disposed that +the money should be given to some charity; and in consequence of +reading one of the Reports you kindly sent me, the young woman had a +great desire that her own repentance might yield fruit to that work +of faith and love. Her wishes have been sanctioned by her former +mistress. It is rather remarkable that our truly Christian servant +had been converted a year and a half, before this individual sin, +calling for pecuniary restitution, had come into her remembrance." + +April 13. I conversed with another of the Orphans, who seems to have +been truly converted, and who has walked consistently for many +months. Tomorrow she will be united with the saints in communion. She +will be the third in fellowship with us, and several have died in the +faith. How has the Lord owned the work, even in this respect! + +April 14. Today 5l. 0s. 8d. came in for the Orphans, 1l. of which is +one of the most remarkable gifts that we have ever had. A poor +brother, with a large family, and small wages (there are eight in the +family, and he had 15s. wages till lately, when they were raised to +18s.) put by this money by little and little of what was given him by +his master for beer. This brother, who was converted about five years +ago, was before that time a notorious drunkard. + +April 30. Today our dear young brother, John Short, only a little +more than 14 years old, fell asleep, after having been for several +years ill. He had been for several years converted. He was one of our +Sunday-School children before his illness. When, many months since, +he lost one of his limbs by amputation, he glorified the Lord not +merely by the way in which he sustained the severe suffering +attending the operation, but also by confessing the Lord, as his +strength, in the hour of trial. He was a sweet youth! + +July 2. Today was given me, when there was not one shilling in hand, +50l. for the School--Bible--and Missionary-Fund. + +July 15. Monday. Today 2l. 7s. 3d. was needed for the Orphans, but we +had nothing. How to obtain the means for a dinner, and for what else +was needed, I knew not. My heart was perfectly at peace, and +unusually sure of help, though I knew not in the least whence it was +to come. Before brother T. came, I received a letter from India, +written in May, with an order for 50l. for the Orphans. I had said +last Saturday to brother T., that it would be desirable to have 50l., +as the salaries of all my fellow-labourers are due, the three +treacle-casks empty, all the provision stores exhausted, several +articles of clothing needed, and worsted for the boys to go on with +their knitting. Now the Lord has sent exactly 50l. Moreover this +money comes very seasonably, as in three days I shall have to leave +Bristol for some days, and can now go comfortably, as it regards +leaving means behind. + +[In the afternoon of this same day I met at a brother's house with +several believers, when a sister said that she had often thought +about the care and burden I must have on my mind, as it regards +obtaining the necessary supplies for so many persons. As this may not +be a solitary instance, I would state, that, by the grace of God, +this is no cause of anxiety to me. The children I have years ago cast +upon the Lord. The whole work is His, and it becomes me to be without +carefulness. In whatever points I am lacking, in this point I am +able, by the grace of God, to roll the burden upon my heavenly +Father. Though now (July 1845) for about seven years our funds have +been so exhausted, that it has been comparatively a rare case that +there have been means in hand to meet the necessities of the Orphans +for three days together; yet have I been only once tried in spirit, +and that was on Sept. 18, 1838, when for the first time the Lord +seemed not to regard our prayer. But when He did send help at that +time, and I saw that it was only for the trial of our faith, and not +because He had forsaken the work that we were brought so low, my soul +was so strengthened and encouraged, that I have not only not been +allowed to distrust the Lord since that time, but I have not even +been cast down when in the deepest poverty. Nevertheless, in this +respect also am I now, as much as ever, dependant on the Lord; and I +earnestly beseech for myself and my fellow-labourers the prayers of +all those, to whom the glory of God is dear. How great would be the +dishonour to the name of God, if we, who have so publicly made our +boast in Him, should so fall as to act in these very points as the +world does! Help us then, brethren, with your prayers, that we may +trust in God to the end. We can expect nothing but that our faith +will yet be tried, and it may be more than ever; and we shall fall, +if the Lord does not uphold us.] + +July 16 and 17. These two days we have had two especial prayer +meetings, to commend to the Lord five German brethren who for some +weeks have been sojourning among us, and who purpose to leave +tomorrow for Liverpool, to sail from thence to the East Indies. + +July 18. I left this morning with the German brethren, to accompany +them to Liverpool. + +July 21. Liverpool. This afternoon I preached in the open air on the +docks. Truly, it must be a sweet privilege to be permitted frequently +to proclaim the glad tidings of the Gospel in the open air, which the +Lord does not bestow upon me, as, under ordinary circumstances, I +have no strength for this work.--The people were attentive. There was +but one who mocked. + +July 22. Preached again out of doors. + +July 23. I accompanied the five brethren on board this afternoon. + +July 27. Today I had another remarkable proof of the importance of +the children of God opening their hearts to each other, especially +when they are getting into a cold state, or are under the power of a +certain sin, or are in especial difficulty. An individual called on +me, who I trust is a brother, with whom I had conversed once before, +but felt uncomfortable respecting him. When he called again today, it +appeared to me that there was something upon his heart, which, if I +could but know, I might be instrumental in benefiting him. I pressed +him affectionately to open his heart, assuring him at the same time +that the matter which he might speak of should remain in my own +bosom. At last I succeeded. [The result of this conversation was, +that the advice which I gave him, led him, after three days, to leave +for America, where he ought to have been, instead of being in +England; and if he has followed my advice, in one other point, the +matter which for years had burdened his conscience, and which, no +doubt had been the means of keeping him in a low spiritual state, +will have no more power over him. Should this fall into the hands of +any children of God who have a particular trial or burden, or a +guilty conscience, on account of a particular thing, or a besetting +sin, etc., on account of which it would be beneficial to open their +hearts to another child of God, in whose love, spiritual judgment, +etc., they have confidence, I would advise them to do so. I know from +my own experience, how often the snare of the devil has been broken, +when under the power of sin; how often the heart has been comforted, +when nigh to be overwhelmed; how often advice, under great +perplexity, has been obtained,--by opening my heart to a brother in +whom I had confidence. We are children of the same family, and ought +therefore to be helpers one of another.] + +Aug. 3. L3. 5s. was required to meet the necessities of the +Orphan-Houses this day. The Lord enabled us to meet this demand, +partly, by the sale of some Indian muslin, which had been given some +months since, but which was only now disposed of; partly, by a few +small donations; and partly, by what one of the labourers added of +his own. [We have often found that the money for articles, which were +put out to be sold, has come in most seasonably. At this time it +happened so that a brother, into whose hands the muslin had been put, +felt himself stirred up to go and ask the individual who had it for +sale whether she had disposed of it. This brother knew nothing about +our need at that time.] + +Aug. 5. Monday. On Saturday and yesterday morning I had repeatedly +asked the Lord to send us help, as there was not a penny in hand for +the need of today. Yesterday morning a brother gave me two +sovereigns, and in the evening I received two more. Besides this, +there was 4l. 10s. anonymously given for three weeks' rent for the +Orphan-Houses, also 10s. by a brother, and 9s. came in for needlework +of the children; so that altogether 9l. 9s. came in yesterday. + +This evening I took tea with a sister who purposes to leave Bristol +tomorrow for Van Diemen's Land. [For the comfort of any saints, who +may be similarly situated, I mention the following circumstance. The +son of this sister was transported many years since. In the course of +time he obtained a business of his own in Van Diemen's Land, and +wished his mother to come to him. The mother went, and had, in answer +to the prayers of the saints, a prosperous voyage. When she arrived, +she found her son truly converted. What a joy for the long and deeply +afflicted mother! What remarkable means the Lord uses to bestow +blessings! Moreover, to mark that the Lord had sent her to her son, +she found that a month before her arrival his wife had died, and that +she therefore reached him just at the right time, both on account of +his children and his business.] + +Aug. 7. Today again about 3l. was needed for housekeeping at the +Orphan-Houses, which the Lord had sent in since the day before +yesterday, so that we were able to meet all the demands. + +Aug. 8. Today 1l. 3s. was needed, but only 3s. had come in. The +deficiency was supplied by one of the labourers giving a sovereign of +his own. Though there is no money in hand, yet are we so little +discouraged, that we have received today one orphan boy, and have +given notice for the admission of six other children, which will +bring the number up to 98 altogether. + +Aug. 9. Only 10s. had come in since yesterday, and as 30s. were +needed, one of the labourers gave a sovereign. + +Aug. 10. Saturday. The need of today is 2l. 10s. but only 10s, has +been given since yesterday. One of the labourers, having 2l., gave +it, and thus our need was supplied. + +Aug. 12. Monday. The Lord has again kindly sent 11l. Of this sum 10l. +came in from Q. Q., when again there was not one penny in hand. We +have now supplies for about four days. + +Aug. 14. Today was very seasonably sent a whole piece of calico and a +piece of print. + +Aug. 16. All our money is now again gone. Today 1l. 3s. was needed, +but only 3s. was in hand. One of the labourers was able to add a +sovereign, and thus we were helped. + +Aug. 17. Saturday. 5l. was needed today, but only 7s. 6d. had come +in. The remaining 2l. l2s. 6d. one of the labourers gave. Thus we +were helped to the close of another week. + +Aug. 19. Monday. This has been again a day in which our faith has +been particularly tried; but even this day we have not been +confounded. Not one penny was in hand when the day began. We had +therefore now, for more than one hundred persons, again to look to +the Lord. But this I must say, to the praise of the Lord, my soul was +perfectly at peace. I meant to have gone very early to the +Orphan-Houses to meet with my fellow-labourers for prayer; but, as +one person after the other called upon me, I was kept from it the +whole morning. When brother T. called upon me between 12 and 1 +o'clock for money, I had none to give. In the afternoon at four I was +able to meet with the brethren and sisters. When I came to the +Girls'-Orphan-House, I found that one of those children, for the +reception of whom we had given notice, had been brought from Bath, +and with him was sent 1l. 5s. After the meeting was over, one of the +labourers gave 10s. By means of this 1l. 15s. we were able for this +day also to provide every thing needful. + +Aug. 20. When we met together this morning for prayer, only one +shilling had come in since yesterday, and 2l. at least was needed to +meet the expenses of this day. After prayer, one of the labourers +gave 10s., and 1s. 1 1/2d. was taken out of one of the boxes. This +12s. 1 1/2d. was divided to meet the momentary need. About an hour +afterwards, 1l. 14s. came in, being the payment, in part, of articles +which had been sold several months since. + +Aug. 21. Nothing had come in since yesterday. 13s. would have been +needed to have taken in the usual quantity of bread. After we had +prayed, the same labourer who had contributed yesterday and the day +before, gave today 5s. more. This helped us to buy milk; but in one +of the houses the usual quantity of bread could not be taken in. I +have further to notice respecting this time of trial, that I had +purposed to have gone yesterday to Bath, to meet today and tomorrow +with several brethren, who are met there from various parts of the +country, to unite in prayer for the present spiritual necessities of +the church at large. However, on account of our present need in the +Orphan-Houses, I could not go yesterday, as I did not think it right +to let my fellow-labourers bear the trial alone. Today also I have +been kept here, as our poverty is greater than ever. Yet (the Lord be +praised!) neither have the children in the least lacked this day, nor +has my mind been in any degree disturbed. My fellow-labourers also +seem quite in peace. We are waiting for deliverance, and we are sure +that the Lord, in His own time, will send it. + +Aug. 22. In my morning walk, when I was reminding the Lord of our +need, I felt assured that He would send help this day. My assurance +sprang from our need; for there seemed no way to get through the day, +without help being sent. After breakfast I considered whether there +was any thing which might be turned into money for the dear children. +Among other things, there came under my hands a number of religious +pamphlets which had been given for the benefit of the Orphans; but +all seemed not nearly enough, to meet the necessities of the day, In +this our deep poverty, after I had gathered together the few things +for sale, a sister, who earns her bread by the labour of her hands, +brought 82l. This sister had seen it to be binding upon believers in +our Lord Jesus to act out His commandments: "Sell that ye have (sell +your possessions) and give alms," Luke xii. 33; and "Lay not up for +yourselves treasures upon earth," Matt. vi. 19. Accordingly she had +drawn her money out of the bank and stocks, being 250l., and had +brought it to me at three different times for the benefit of the +Orphans, the Bible--Missionary--and School-Fund, and the poor saints, +About two months ago she brought me 100l. more, being the produce of +some other possession which she had sold, the half of which was to be +used for the School--Bible-and Missionary Fund; and the other half +for the poor saints. This 82l. which she had brought today, is the +produce of the sale of her last earthly possession.--[At the time I am +preparing the seventh edition for the press, more than twenty-nine +years have passed away, and this sister has never expressed the least +regret as to the step she took, but goes on, quietly labouring with +her hands, to earn her bread.]--But even now, when this money was +given, I left it in the hands of the Lord, whether any part of it +should be applied for the Orphans. I asked the sister, therefore, +whether she wished the money to be spent in any particular way, as +she had expressed her wish about the former sums. This time she left +it with me, to lay out the money as I thought best. I took, +therefore, half of it for the Orphans, and half for the other objects +of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. I have thus been enabled to +come to Bath, (after I had sent a more than usual supply to the +matrons), to meet, at least for the remaining time, with the brethren +who are assembled here for prayer. Before the day is over, I have +received 10l. more, while at Bath, from one of the brethren who are +assembled here; so that our deep poverty, in the morning, has been +turned into a comparative abundance. + +Aug. 23. The Lord has sent still further supplies. Another of the +brethren gave me this morning 1l., and a third, with whom I drove +back to Bristol, 5l. + +From Aug. 25 to Sept. 1, there came in above 17l. more. + +Sept. 4. I have been led to pray whether it is the Lord's will that I +should leave Bristol for a season, as I have for the last fortnight +been suffering from indigestion, by which my whole system is +weakened, and thus the nerves of my head are more than usually +affected. There are, however, two hindrances in the way, want of +means for the Orphans, and want of means for my own personal +expenses.--Today I have received a cheque from Q. Q. for 7l. 10s. for +the Orphans, which came, therefore, very seasonably. Also 4l. besides +has came in since the day before yesterday. + +Sept. 5. Today a sister sent me 5l. for myself, to be used for the +benefit of my health. She had heard that my health is again failing. +I do not lay by money for such purposes; but whenever I really need +means, whether for myself or others, the Lord sends them, in answer +to prayer; for He had in this case again given me prayer respecting +means for myself and for the Orphans, that my way might be made plain +as to leaving Bristol for a season. + +Sept. 6. My body is now so weak, and my head again so affected in +consequence of it, and I have found it needful to give up the work at +once. I left today for Trowbridge, for three days, intending +afterwards to go with my wife into Devonshire, if the Lord permit. + +Sept. 7. Trowbridge. This has been a very good day. I have had much +communion with the Lord. How kind to take me from the work at Bristol +for a season, to give me more communion with Himself. I remembered +the Lord's especial goodness to me in this place, at the commencement +of last year. How kind has He also been since! I prayed much for +myself, for the Church at large, for the saints here and in Bristol, +for my unconverted relatives, for my dear wife, and that the Lord +would supply my own temporal necessities and those of the Orphans:--and +I know that He has heard me.--I am surrounded with kind friends +in the dear saints, under whose roof I am, and feel quite at home. My +room is far better than I need; yet an easy chair, in this my weak +state of body, to kneel before in prayer, would have added to my +comfort. In the afternoon, without having given a hint about it, I +found an easy chair put into my room. I was struck with the kindness, +the especial kindness of my heavenly Father, in being mindful of the +smallest wants and comforts of His child.--Having had more prayer than +usual, I found that my intercourse with the saints at tea was with +unction, and more than usually profitable. But this very fact reminds +me of my sad deficiencies, and of my great lack of real fervency of +spirit. May the Lord carry on His work with power in my soul! Today I +had 1l. given to me, half for the Orphans, and half for the other +funds. Thus the Lord has begun to answer my prayers; for I expect far +more. + +Sept. 8. Lord's day. I assembled with a few saints at Trowbridge, and +spoke to them in the morning and evening with much assistance. The +afternoon I spent at home over the Word and in prayer. God has +evidently blessed the Word. He had a purpose in sending me here, both +for blessing to myself and to others. + +Sept. 9. This morning I conversed with a poor aged sister in the +Lord, who for 47 years has been a believer, but who, from want of +settling by the written Word only, whether she is a believer or not, +has often had doubts about her state before God. However, I brought +the Scriptures only before her. [My pressing the Scriptures alone +upon her heart, was made such a blessing, that I hear she has not +doubted in the same way since.] This aged sister told me she often +prays for the Orphans, and for the continuance of means. How many +helpers has the Christian in the conflict; yet all are strengthened +by ONE who is ALWAYS for us! + +This evening I returned to Bristol, to go from hence tomorrow to +Exeter, if the Lord permit, on account of my health. I had been +earnestly asking the Lord, while I was staying at Trowbridge, that He +would be pleased to send in supplies for the Orphans, before I go +into Devonshire, and I had the fullest assurance that means would +come in before I left Bristol. I therefore asked my wife, on my +return, how much had come in, and found that it was only 8l. 9s. 7 +3/4d. This was not nearly as much as I had expected, and would not +answer the end for which I had particularly asked means, i. e. that I +might be able to leave enough for several days. My reply therefore +was, according to the faith given to me, and judging from the +earnestness and confidence of my prayer, that the Lord would send +more before I left. About an hour after, brother Craik brought me +10l., which he had received this evening with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, +and also a letter from a brother at Ilfracombe, in which the arrival +of a large box, full of articles, to be sold for the benefit of the +Orphans, is announced. Thus the Lord has dealt with me according to +my faith. + +Sept. 10. This morning before I left Bristol came in still further +1l. l6s. 7d., so that I had about 20l. to leave behind for the +present need. I found also, on opening the box which has arrived, 65 +books, a brace of valuable pistols, and a great many articles of East +India linen. How kind of the Lord to send these supplies just now! + +After my departure from Bristol I continued to help my +fellow-labourers by my prayers. I had the fullest assurance that the +Lord would help them, and my hope was not ashamed, as will appear +from the following part of the journal.--In the evening of Sept. 10th, +we arrived in Exeter, where we were lodged by a brother, who on the +following day left for Plymouth. The love of this brother constrained +us to remain for five days at his house, though he was absent, +leaving us all the house with a sister, as a servant, to ourselves. +Though at another time I should have preferred the opportunity of +having intercourse with this brother, yet now, in this my weak state +of body, the being left alone was the very thing which suited me. I +could not but trace the kind hand of God in this circumstance. I was +able to speak twice publicly while in Exeter. I rejoiced at what I +saw there of the work of God. This city was in the year 1830 +especially laid on my heart, when I used frequently to preach there; +but then there was a great spiritual deadness. + +From Sept. 16th to Sept. 28th we were at Teignmouth my former field +of labour. I had not seen the brethren, among whom I used to labour, +since May, 1833. The Lord gave me strength, many times to minister in +the Word among them, during the time of my stay there. At Teignmouth +also, I had, in some respects, reason to be glad, particularly in +that I saw some of those truths practised, and that more fully and +intelligently, which, though in much weakness and indistinctly, I had +sought to set forth whilst labouring there. At Teignmouth also, as +well as in Exeter, the saints showed us much love. A brother and +sister lodged us during the whole of our stay. May the Lord reward +them for their love!--While I was at Teignmouth I received on Sept. +18th, the following letter from brother T., in reference to the work +in Bristol:-- + +Bristol, Sept. 16, 1839. + +My dear Brother, I have delayed writing until now, that, as I hoped, +I might have additional news to tell you after the Lord's day. And +now that my hope has been made good, I rejoice to do so. The Lord has +dealt most graciously with us since your departure. The children, +brother B. and the sisters are well, and the wants of the Orphans +have been abundantly supplied. There has come in altogether 24l. 8s. +6d., &c. + +On Sept. 24th, I received another letter from brother T., dated +Bristol, Sept. 23rd, in which he writes: "It rejoices me that I have +still nothing but the goodness of the Lord to tell you of. That +little word 'Ebenezer' is at once our encouragement and our daily +song, of which we are not weary. I have received since the last +information you had from me 5l. l7s. 4 1/4d., besides 1l. 10s. for +the rent of the Orphan-Houses." + +On Sept. 28th, while I was at Teignmouth, a brother asked me about +the funds for the Orphans, being willing to help, and I had reason to +believe considerably, if they were in need. Though I knew not for a +certainty that there was one shilling in hand in Bristol, yet for the +Lord's sake I declined telling him any thing about the funds, in +order that the work might evidently be carried on by dealing with the +Lord Himself. + +On Sept. 28th we left Teignmouth for Plymouth, being taken by the +love of a brother from Teignmouth to Newton Bushel in his own little +carriage. At Plymouth we found again a kind brother waiting at the +coach office, to receive us. He took us to his house and lodged us +till our departure, on Oct. 6th. During my stay at Plymouth, I was +stirred up afresh to early rising, a blessing, the results of which I +have not lost since. That which led me to it was the example of the +brother in whose house I was staying, and a remark which he made in +speaking on the sacrifices in Leviticus, "That as not the refuse of +the animals was to be offered up, so the best part of our time should +be especially given to communion with the Lord." I had been, on the +whole, rather an early riser during former years. But since the +nerves of my head had been so weak, I thought, that, as the day was +long enough for my strength, it would be best for me not to rise +early, in order that thus the nerves of my head might have the longer +quiet. On this account I rose only between six and seven, and +sometimes after seven. For the same reason also I brought myself +purposely into the habit of sleeping a quarter of an hour, or half an +hour, after dinner: as I thought I found benefit from it, in quieting +the nerves of my head. In this way, however, my soul had suffered +more or less every day, and sometimes considerably, as now and then +unavoidable work came upon me before I had had sufficient time for +prayer and reading the Word. After I had heard the remark to which I +have alluded, I determined, that whatever my body might suffer, I +would no longer let the most precious part of the day pass away while +I was in bed. By the grace of God I was enabled to begin the very +next day to rise earlier, and have continued to rise early since that +time. I allow myself now about seven hours' sleep, which, though I am +far from being strong, and have much to tire me mentally, I find is +quite sufficient to refresh me. In addition to this I gave up the +sleeping after dinner. The result has been that I have thus been able +to procure long and precious seasons for prayer and meditation before +breakfast; and, as to my body, and the state of the nervous system in +particular, I have been much better since. Indeed I believe that the +very worst thing I could have done for my weak nerves was, to have +lain an hour or more longer in bed than I used to do before my +illness; for it was the very way to keep them weak.--As this may fall +into the hands of some children of God who are not in the habit of +rising early, I make a few more remarks on the subject. + +I. It might be asked, how much time shall I allow myself for rest? +The answer is, that no rule of universal application can be given, as +all persons do not require the same measure of sleep, and also the +same persons, at different times, according to the strength or +weakness of their body, may require more or less. Females also, being +generally weaker in body, require more sleep than males. Yet, from +what I can learn, it is the opinion of medical persons, that men in +health do not require more than between six and seven hours sleep, +and females no more than between seven and eight hours; so that it +would be rather an exception, for a man to require more than seven +and a woman more than eight hours. But my decided advice, at the same +time, is, that children of God should be careful not to allow +themselves too little sleep, as there are few men who can do with +less than six hours sleep, and yet be well in body and mind, and few +females who can do with less than seven hours. Certain it is that for +a long time, as a young man before I went to the university, I went +to bed regularly at ten and rose at four, studied hard, and was in +good health; and certain also, that since I have allowed myself only +about seven hours, from the time of my visit at Plymouth in Oct. +1839, I have been much better in body, and in my nerves in +particular, than when I was eight or eight hours and a half in bed. + +II. If it be asked, but why should I rise early? The reply is, to +remain too long in bed is 1. waste of time, which is unbecoming a +saint, who is bought by the precious blood of Jesus, with his time +and all he has, to be used for the Lord. If we sleep more than is +needful for the refreshment of the body, it is wasting the time with +which the Lord has intrusted us as a talent, to be used for His +glory, for our own benefit, and the benefit of the saints and the +unbelievers around us. 2. To remain too long in bed injures the body. +Just as when we take too much food, we are injured thereby, so as it +regards sleep. Medical persons would readily allow, that, the lying +longer in bed than is needful for the strengthening of the body, does +weaken it. 3. It injures the soul. The lying too long in bed, not +merely keeps us from giving the most precious part of the day to +prayer and meditation, but this sloth leads also to many other +evils.--Any one need but make the experiment of spending one, two, or +three hours in prayer and meditation before breakfast, either in his +room, or with his Bible in his hand in the fields, and he will soon +find out the beneficial effect which early rising has upon the +outward and inward man. I beseech all my brethren and sisters into +whose hand this may fall, and who are not in the habit of rising +early, to make the trial, and they will praise the Lord for having +done so. + +III. It may lastly be said, but how shall I set about rising early? +My advice is, 1. Commence at once, delay it not. Tomorrow begin to +rise. 2. But do not depend upon your own strength. This may be the +reason why, before this, you may have begun to rise early, but have +given it up. As surely as you depend upon your own strength in this +matter, it will come to nothing. In every good work we depend upon +the Lord, and in this thing we shall feel especially how weak we are. +If any one rises that he may give the time which he takes from sleep, +to prayer and meditation, let him be sure that Satan will try to put +obstacles in the way. 3. Do trust in the Lord for help, You will +honour Him, if you expect help from Him in this matter. Give yourself +to prayer for help, expect help, and you will have it. 4. Use, +however, in addition to this, the following means: a, Go early to +bed. If you stay up late, you cannot rise early. Let no society and +no pressure of engagements keep you from going habitually early to +bed. If you fail in this, you neither can nor ought to get up early, +as your body requires rest. Keep also particularly in mind, that +neither for the body nor the soul is it the same thing, whether you +go to bed late and rise late, or whether you go to bed early and rise +early. Even medical persons will tell you how injurious it is to sit +up late, and to spend the morning hours in bed; but how much more +important still is it to retire early and to rise early, in order to +make sure of time for prayer and meditation before the business of +the day commences, and to devote to those exercises that part of our +time, when the mind and the body are most fresh, in order thus to +obtain spiritual strength for the conflict, the trials, and the work +of the day. b, Let some one call you, if possible, at the time which +you have determined before God that you will rise; or procure, what +is still better, an alarum, by which you may regulate almost to a +minute the time when you wish to rise. For about 12s. a little German +clock, with an alarum, may be bought almost in every town. Though I +have very many times been awakened by the Lord, in answer to prayer, +almost to the minute when I desired to rise; yet I thought it well to +procure an alarum, to assist me in my purpose of rising early: not +indeed as if it could give the least help, without the Lord's +blessing, for I should remain in bed, notwithstanding the noise of +the alarum, were He not to give me grace to rise; but simply looking +upon it as a means. c, Rise at once when you are awake. Remain not a +minute longer in bed, else you are likely to fall asleep again. d, Be +not discouraged by feeling drowsy and tired in consequence of your +rising early. This will soon wear off. You will after a few days feel +yourself stronger and fresher than when you used to lie an hour or +two longer than you needed. e, Allow yourself always the same hours +for sleep. Make no change, except sickness oblige you. . + +Plymouth, Oct. 1. Today my soul was again especially drawn out in +prayer for the dear Orphans. I not merely asked the Lord that He +would still continue to supply their need, but I was so fully assured +that He had sent the necessary means since I last heard, that I was +enabled to praise Him for having done so. Immediately after I had +praised Him, but while I was yet on my knees, came another letter +from brother T., dated Bristol, Sept. 29, in which he writes thus: + +"The Lord's help has been graciously continued to us since I wrote +last. Ever since your absence, the supplies have come in so +seasonably, that I have not had occasion, until now, of opening the +boxes in the Orphan-Houses. There came in, since my last account, +from a sister 2s. 6d., with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, 1l.. 1s. 6d., +through Mr. C. of Bath, 2l. 3s. 4d., from the boxes 14s. 6 1/2d., +from A. M. B. 5s. Some apples besides have been given, some old +clothes, and a large bath to be sold or used. I gave on Thursday to +the sisters 10l., and today for the Boys'-Orphan-House 1l. 10s. After +this I have in hand 1l. 3s. 8 3/4d., to be multiplied as the Lord +wills. I had written thus far, and was on the point of writing that +we expected sister E. home this evening, when the door-bell rang, and +sister E. came in, bringing a little packet of money, directed to +you, from Hereford, enclosing a letter and ten sovereigns "for your +labours of faith and love;" so that the remainder of the barrel of +meal has been multiplied somewhat already. It is most seasonable +help! It rejoices me that it has come in time, for you to have the +intelligence with this letter. I have in hand l9s. for the other +funds, therefore it seems well to me, if it should be needed before I +hear from you, to take only 5l. for the Orphans; but, if it pleases +the Lord to enable us to do without, I shall leave it untouched until +you write. In addition to what I have written, I have just received +10s. and 1l. 9s. 3d. How gracious!" + +The time from October 6th to the 17th I spent among the brethren at +Bideford and Barnstaple, with great refreshment to my own soul, and +was also allowed by the Lord to minister to them. The whole of my +stay among the children of God in Devonshire has been very profitable +to me. May my soul not lose the blessing of it! How the Lord uses our +infirmity of body for the blessing of our souls! In my case also it +was instrumental in communicating blessing to others. I was able to +speak more frequently in public, while absent from Bristol, than I +should have done under ordinary circumstances, had I remained in +Bristol. + +Barnstaple, Oct. 10. The day before yesterday I had 10s. given to me +here for the Orphans; and yesterday 3l., which came in most +seasonably, as will appear from the following letter which I received +this evening from brother T. + +Bristol, Oct. 8th, 1839. + +"My dear Brother, we have continued to enjoy the gracious help of the +Lord since I last wrote to you. Nearly up to that time the supplies +had come in so seasonably, that the previous disbursements had +scarcely ever been expended, before I was again able to make a fresh +one. Since then, however, we have been twice a little straitened. On +Friday evening we were in prospect of Saturday's necessities, and had +nothing to meet them, except the money about which I was in doubt +from not having received directions from you. I had already used 5l. +out of the 10l. which had been sent, and now, after waiting till it +was actually needed, we thought it an indication, as none had been +sent, that this should all go to the Orphan-Houses. On Monday again +more money was needed than I had in hand, but we were in expectation +of help. After dinner, as nothing had come in, I thought it well to +open the boxes, thinking, that, although I had opened them so +recently, I had no right to presume that the Lord had not had time to +pour into them. The expectation was not in vain; for in the box at +the Boys'-Orphan-House I found 1l. 0s. 1 1/2d., in the box at the +Girls'-Orphan-House 7s. 1d. At the latter place I met sister A. who +gave me 3s. for things that she had sold. Thus we were most +graciously helped through Monday. Then, in the evening, at the +meeting I received from sister B. 2s., and through sister C. 11s. I +had opened the box at the Infant-Orphan-House on Monday, and found it +empty. But today, finding the 13s. insufficient, and being told that +something had been put in, I opened it, and found 3s. 6d., which +nicely helped us through. And we are now looking to the Lord for +more. In the mean time I shall this morning attend to the sale of +whatever has been given to be sold. It comforts us to know you are +praying for us," &c. + +The money which I had received yesterday and the day before yesterday +here, at Barnstaple, and two weeks ago at Teignmouth, enabled me now +to send off at once 5l. + +On Oct. 17th I returned to Bristol, with renewed strength, for active +service. + +Oct. 17. Bristol. The Lord has been again very gracious as it regards +the funds; for during the last three days, while I was at Barnstaple, +I received from a sister 5s., two rings, and a brooch. From another +sister a gold watch, to be sold for the Orphans. From a brother a +seal, two ear-rings, and a brooch. From a third sister sixteen books +to be sold; also 4l., the produce of a veil. From a fourth sister 2l. +10s., and from a fifth 1l., and from five others 8s. 9d. In addition +to this I found when I came home, that though my fellow-labourers had +been greatly tried a few days previous to my return, so much so, +that, when the 5l. arrived which I sent from Barnstaple, they were in +greater poverty than they ever had been; yet, within the last days, +several pounds had come in, and yesterday, over and above all this, +arrived 15l. from London for some articles which had been sent there +to be sold. What can we render unto the Lord for all His benefits! + +Oct. 19. The Lord is still pouring in bountifully! This morning 10l. +was sent from Worcester, and a sister brought 7l., being the produce +of the sale of ladies' baskets, which she and some other sisters are +making for the benefit of the Orphans. This last case shows what +various means the Lord uses to provide for our need; yet all comes +without one single individual being asked to give help; for to the +Lord alone we speak about our need. We are now again comparatively +rich, i. e. we have means in hand to meet the current expenses of +about eight days, which has been only two or three times the case +during the last fifteen months. + +Oct. 30. A little boy brought me a letter, given to him by a +gentleman and lady in the street, as he said, to take to my house. +The letter contained these words with a five pound note: "The +enclosed 5l. accept for the benefit of the Orphans, in the name of +the Lord Jesus." + +Nov. 5. Today an Orphan was brought from Bath, and a lady sent by her +servant, the aunt of the child, a sovereign for the Orphans, when +there was but 3s. 11d. in hand. It has been thus repeatedly, that +when orphans have been brought, and we had no money, or scarcely any, +that the Lord sent a little with these poor children. It never is +with us any question, whether there is much or little money in hand, +so far as it regards the reception of children; but only, whether +there is room. + +Nov. 8. We are now again quite poor. The Lord gave us to know more +than usually from Oct. 17th to Oct. 31st what it is to abound, and +now we know again what it is to be poor. It would have been desirable +to have had 3l. today, but only 1l. 3s. 11d, was in hand, which I +sent off. In our need we were led to open the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, which had not been done for some weeks, and in them +was found 16s. 2 1/2d. To this one of the labourers added 9s. By this +2l. 9s. 1 1/2d. we could meet those expenses which needed to be met, +and we were thus helped through the day. + +Nov. 9. Saturday. 3l. 0s. 6d. was required today, in order +comfortably to meet the present demands, but not one penny was in +hand. Between ten and eleven I went to the Girls'-Orphan-House, to +meet with my fellow-labourers for prayer. Only 2s. had come in. This +was all I could leave. There was every thing in the houses which was +required for the moment, and I proposed that we should meet again for +prayer in the afternoon at four. When we did so, one of the labourers +gave 8s. 6d., another 10s., another 5s. 6d., so that I had as much to +give to the matrons as would provide comfortably all the necessaries +for the children till Monday morning; only the usual quantity of +bread could not be taken in. About half an hour, after we had +separated, came in 1l. 10s., the produce of the sale of a shawl, +which a sister from Devonshire had given for that purpose some days +since. Thus we had altogether 2l. 16s., whereas when the day +commenced we had no natural prospect of any thing. This is a new +sweet encouragement. Besides this, our Father has given us another +proof of His continued care, in that twenty sacks of potatoes and a +small barrel of herrings have been sent for the Orphans. + +Nov. 11. Monday morning. Yesterday, when, as just related, there was +not a penny in hand, there was given to me, with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, +ten shillings. This morning came in 1l. 10s, more, Soon afterwards a +note was sent to me from the Orphan-Houses, to say that the need of +today would be 3l. JUST WHILE I WAS READING THE NOTE I received +another, including a sovereign, which a sister from Devonshire had +given to one of the brethren for the Orphans. Thus I had just the 3l. +which was needed. A few minutes after came in 1s. more. + +Nov. 12. The need of today was 2l. As only 1s. had been left in hand +yesterday, and no more than 6s. had come in, we were again in a +strait. But I was not looking at the little in hand, but at the +fulness of God. I sent off the little which I had. In the afternoon +we met for prayer. I then found that 2s. 6d. had been taken out of +the box in the Infant-Orphan-House, and that 4s. more had come in by +the sale of some old books. To this one of the labourers added 2s. +3d., all she had of her own. After prayer came in 2s. 6d., which had +been given while we were in prayer. In the evening we met again for +prayer, when another labourer gave 3s. 4d. Thus, in our deep poverty, +we got together this day 1l. 0s. 7d., which supplied our absolute +necessities. We were this afternoon so reduced, till the Lord sent a +little help, that there were no means to provide breakfast for +tomorrow, for the children in the Boys'-Orphan-House. + +Nov. 13. Nothing has come in. Our need is even greater today than +yesterday, on account of our not having been able yesterday to take +in the usual quantity of provisions. In this our need I packed up the +books, which had been intended for sale on Aug. 22, when the Lord +sent such a rich, supply, before they were actually disposed of. To +them one of the labourers added some of his own, and a few other +articles. Also some old jackets, which had been sent, were packed up +to be disposed of. At twelve I met with my fellow-labourers for +prayer. + +There was every thing in the houses which was needed for dinner, but +there were no means to get milk for tea. (The children have milk and +water at tea time.) Three of my helpers went out to dispose of the +articles. At four in the afternoon I received the information that +14s. had come in, for some of the things which were disposed of. One +of my fellow-labourers had besides disposed of an article of his own +for 1l. 5s. This 1l. 19s. enabled us to take in bread as usual, and +to defray the other necessary expenses. We had never been lower in +means than yesterday and today. Yet my soul, thanks to the Lord! was +also yesterday and today in perfect peace. My helpers seem also quite +in peace. This evening I received 2s. 6d., and 11s. with Ecclesiastes +ix. 10. This little money is as precious, as at other times 100l. +would have been, because it is a fresh proof that our Father still +cares for us. The money was given to me just after I had been +speaking on these words: "But I am poor and needy; yet the Lord +thinketh upon me." Whilst speaking I was able, in a measure, to +realize the preciousness of the truth contained in those words, and +after speaking my Father gave me a fresh proof that He is thinking +upon me. + +Nov. 14. I took the 13s. 6d. which was given last evening, early this +morning, to the Orphan-Houses, where I found that 10s. 6d. had come +in by the sale of a Hebrew Old and a Greek New Testament, which a +brother had given who had more than one copy; and 1s. 6d. for another +book. This 1l. 5s. 6d. has been divided, in the hope that our kind +Father will remember us before the day is over, and send in more. +This afternoon, when we met for prayer, I found that 18s. more had +come in for some articles which had been sold. We have had thus 2l. +3s. 6d. this day to divide for housekeeping. By the good hand of the +Lord upon us, there has been every thing really needful. May the Lord +look upon us, and help us further! Surely, He will do it! + +Nov. 15. We are still in deep poverty. Nothing had come in by four +o'clock in the afternoon, when I went to meet with my fellow-labourers +for prayer. I did not go in the morning, because I knew that +there was every thing which was needed till the afternoon. When +I came I found that a sister had given 2s. 6d.; a new Bible +which one of the labourers had given, who had more than one old copy, +had been sold for 10s.; also 2s. had come in, and 1s. 4d. for some +other articles which had been sold. This 15s. 10d. supplied that +which was absolutely needed for today. We are still of good courage. +We are sure that the Lord, in His own time, will deliver us out of +the trial; for were our poverty more than a trial of faith, had the +Lord in anger shut up His hands, we should not receive any thing at +all. But this is not the case. For even this very day two sacks of +potatoes were sent by the same brother who sent twenty sacks a few +days since, with the promise to send still more. We have no means to +lay in a stock for the winter, else we should have bought, perhaps, +fifty or sixty sacks; but our kind Father does it for us. There has +been also a toy chest of drawers promised for sale. + +Nov. 16. Our prayer was last evening, in particular, respecting the +necessities of today, as two days' provisions would be needed, it +being Saturday. Besides this, about 2l. 10s. was needed to pay the +weekly salaries of the brethren and sisters who labour in the +Day-Schools. For all these demands there was nothing in hand, nor +have we any more needless articles to dispose of; and useful ones we +do not consider it right to sell, as our Father knows our need. When +we met about twelve o'clock this morning, I found that last evening +there had been Bibles unexpectedly sold to the amount of 1l. 11s. +6d., and about 10s. had been given besides. Thus we had nearly enough +for the School-Fund. Moreover, 15s. had come in for the Orphan-Fund. +A large sea-chest was given by a brother several months since, for +the benefit of the Orphans, which had never been disposed of, and +which, in this our great need, was sold for 15s. Yet this 15s. was +needed to pay what was due for washing; and, therefore, we had still +nothing to take in provisions with. It occurred to one of the +labourers, that there might be a little advanced on his watch, of the +money which had been laid by for rent, as had once or twice before +been done; and that the watch might be sold at quarter-day, in case +there should not come in enough to make up the deficiency. Yet even +this plan we did not any longer think to be quite Scriptural, as he +needs the watch in the Lord's service, and as our Lord is so kind, +that He would otherwise send us means, were it well for us. In short, +it appeared to us quite clear, that while we ought, in such a strait, +to dispose of things which we do not need, nothing ought to be +disposed of which is needed, in order that the Lord's own deliverance +might be so much the more manifest. All we could think of for sale +was five pewter dishes, which had been given nearly four years ago, +but which were never used, as they were not convenient. These we +agreed should be sold. About four o'clock this afternoon I received +2l. 2s., which a brother and sister had brought from Leicestershire. +With this I went joyfully to the Orphan-Houses. There I found that +9s. 6d. had come in for the pewter dishes; one of the labourers had +given 10s. for the Orphans, and 10s. for the School-Fund. (There had +come in 2s. more for the other funds. All demands were met, and there +was 1s. 6d. over.) Besides this, one of the labourers had sold a book +of his own for 4s., and another labourer gave two pairs of new +gloves, and four gentlemen's stocks. One pair of the gloves had been +sold. Thus altogether had come in 4l. 2s. 3d., and therefore about +1l. 10s. more than was needed. We are now brought to the close of one +more week. This has been, perhaps, of all the weeks the most trying. +So much prayer, and so little coming in, I never knew. Yet, by the +grace of God, I was sure that help would come, after the trial of +faith was over. During the whole of this week, greatly as we have +been tried, and though twice no stock of bread could be taken in, yet +there has been nourishing food at every meal, and neither the +children nor any other person can have perceived our poverty. About +13l. has been spent even this week for housekeeping in the three +Orphan-Houses. + +Nov. 18. Monday. The Lord has kindly sent in since Saturday evening +3l. 18s. 3 1/4d., and thus our need for today is supplied. On +Saturday evening the produce of an orphan-box, 5s. 1 1/4d., was +given; and last evening a sister gave two sovereigns to brother +Craik, waiting for him a long time in the chapel, till she could see +him. She might have delayed giving it till another time, as she had +to wait so long; but the Lord knew our need. There were also sent +eight sack of potatoes, by the same brother who had sent twenty-two +sacks before. + +Nov. 19. As there was not enough money in hand for the necessities of +today, we were again as poor as on Saturday. Between three and four +in the afternoon the milk is generally taken in; but in the +Boys'-Orphan-House there was not money enough to meet this small +expense. However, the Lord knew our need, and sent us at two o'clock +13s., which helped us comfortably through the day. A sister had +purposed in her heart to give 3d. a week for the Orphans, and she +felt herself stirred up to bring the yearly amount now, in this our +extremity. + +Nov. 20. This has been a day of deep poverty. Nothing but the 13s., +above referred to, came in yesterday, which was scarcely enough to +meet yesterday's usual need. My mind, by the grace of God, was not at +all cast down; but I felt it rather trying, that the abundance of my +other engagements had not allowed me to meet with my fellow-labourers, +either yesterday or today, for prayer. This evening I had a +note from the Boys'-Orphan-House, to state that a lady had +sent two dozen of boys' shirts, which she had made herself, with +which she sent 5s. to get them washed. This 5s, enabled us to meet +that which was absolutely needful. [I mention here, that while our +usual current expenses are about 2l. 10s. daily for housekeeping in +the three houses; yet we might, in case of need, do for one or two +days with as little as yesterday and today, as there are generally +potatoes and meat in the house, and a stock of bread for two days, in +order that the children may eat stale bread.] Without this 5s. we +should have been unable to procure all that was absolutely needed. +This our kind Father knew, and therefore He sent it. There were also +given two quarterns of bread by one of the bakers, which made up the +usual quantity. Moreover five and a half sacks of potatoes were sent +by the brother who sent the others, making in all 35 1/2 sacks. + +Nov. 21. This morning one of the labourers gave 7s., in order that +there might be means to take in milk. Between ten and eleven o'clock +we met for prayer, and I found that 10s. had come in for a toy chest +of drawers, which in this our great need had been sent for sale. +Besides this 6d. had been taken out of the box in the Infant-Orphan-House. +This 17s. 6d. enabled us to provide the dinner, and to take in a +little bread in two houses, even as much as would be enough for +breakfast tomorrow; but there was 4s. 6d. needed to buy bread +for the Boys'-Orphan-House, as there was only enough for today. +When we met again this afternoon, 3s. had come in, as one of the +labourers had sold a few old books. Another labourer gave 1s. 6d., +and thus we had also the 4s. 6d., which was needed for bread. After +prayer, it was mentioned that a sister, a servant, who is out of a +situation, had been this afternoon to see the Orphan-Houses, and had +put something into the box at the Girls'-Orphan-House. The box was +opened, and half-a-crown was found in it. This money was, in our deep +poverty, as acceptable as 50l. at other times might have been. We +rejoiced when we saw it, for it was a fresh proof to us, that, not in +anger, but only for the trial of our faith, we are so poor. This 2s. +6d. provides us with the means to take in milk tomorrow morning, so +that we shall have everything which is needed till after breakfast +tomorrow, but then there is neither bread, nor meat, etc. remaining +for dinner. Our comfort, however, is: "The morrow shall take thought +for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil +thereof." Matt. vi. 34. We separated very happy in God, though very +poor, and our faith much tried. + +Nov. 22. Our poverty had now become very great. Greater it had never +been. Yet, the Lord be praised! I was as comfortable as ever; for I +was sure we were only for the trial of our faith in this state. Had +the Lord shut up His hand iii anger, He would not have continued to +give us, even during this week, from time to time, tokens of His care +over us. I said this morning: "Man's necessity is God's opportunity" +is a proverb of the world, and how much more may we, His children, +now look to Him in our great need. I knew we must have help in some +way, as now it had come to the greatest extremity, there being in +none of the houses anything for dinner, except potatoes, of which we +have an abundance. At ten this morning I was informed that a large +box, bearing my address, had arrived at one of the Orphan-Houses. I +set off immediately, and found it was from the neighbourhood of +Wolverhampton. It contained 12l. for the Orphans, 1l. 11s. 10d. for +the other Funds, 4 yards of flannel, 9 yards of calico, 12 yards of +print, 4 1/2 yards of coloured cotton, 4 yards of stuff, 2 pairs of +stockings, and 3 1/4 yards of brown holland. Besides this, there were +in it the following articles for sale: 2 decanters and stands, 4 +glass salt cellars, 3 scent bottles, a set of cruets and stand, 5 +beer glasses, 7 chimney ornaments, 3 tortoise-shell combs, 3 fans, 2 +silver vinaigrettes, 2 silver shoe-buckles, 2 waist buckles, 2 silver +salt-cellars, 1 pair of knives and forks with silver handles, a small +silver toasting fork, 9 silver coins, three gold rings, 4 pairs of +ear-rings, 3 brooches, a cornelian heart, a silver seal, 1 pair of +silver studs, 1 gold watch key, 1 silver pencil case, 5 pairs of +bracelets, 5 necklaces and 1 urn rug. The joy which I and my +fellowlabourers had when all these things lay before us, cannot be +described; it must be experienced in order that it may be known. It +was two hours and a half before the dinner time, when the help was +granted. The Lord knew that the Orphans had no dinner, and, +therefore, did He now send help.--This morning also a brother sent to +the Girls' Orphan-House to ask whether the treacle-cask was empty, +and if so, to send it by the messenger, that it might be filled. + +Nov. 24. Today 5l. came in again with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, besides +1l. 10s. for the rents. + +Nov. 27. Today again some money was needed for housekeeping. But as a +little had come in yesterday and today, we had enough. + +Nov. 28. Last evening 10s. came in, which was just enough to supply +this day's need. We are now again penniless. + +Nov. 29. A great part of the articles, which were sent this day week +from the neighbourhood of Wolverhampton, have now been disposed of +for 5l. 11s.; we are, therefore, supplied for today and tomorrow. + +Dec. 2. Since the last money has been given out for housekeeping, +only 1l. 12s. has come in but as 1l. 10s. of this had been given for +the rents, I had only 2s. in hand, when brother B., the master at the +Boys'-Orphan-House, came this morning, and told me that the need of +today would be at least 2l. I gave him the 2s. which I had, and +proposed that we should pray together for more means. WHILE WE WERE +IN PRAYER, a brother called. After prayer brother B. left me, and the +brother who had come gave me 5l. As soon as he had left, I went +joyfully with the money to the Orphan-Houses, to prevent the bakers +being sent away. This evening I received still further 2l. Thus the +Lord has richly supplied our need for today and tomorrow. + +Dec. 3. The Lord has remembered again our need for tomorrow. I +received today from Liverpool 15s.; and from a brother in the +neighbourhood of London, who had been staying here for a season, 5l.; +also 1l. by the sale of some articles. + +Dec. 4. It has been repeatedly our prayer during the last month and +in the beginning of this, that the Lord would be pleased to give us +again so much means, before the time of the public meetings, which +are fixed for the 10th, 11th, and 12th, of this month, that, when we +speak about His dealings with us during this year, we might also +respecting the close of it have again to speak, to His praise, of the +abundance which we had in hand. At the end of last year we made the +same request, and the Lord granted it. Now today, as an answer to +this our often repeated request, I received from the East Indies +100l., to be laid out for the Orphans, or the other objects of the +Institution. Respecting this money it is to be noticed: 1. The great +distance from whence it is sent. 2. That it comes just now, and thus +enables us to speak at the meetings of this rich supply after our +trials. 3. It furnishes us with means to order Bibles, as one half of +the money will be taken for the other funds; there having been a +great inquiry for Bibles lately, and we have not been able to meet +the demand, for want of means. Respecting this point also we have +prayed repeatedly, and now the Lord has answered our petition. How +very precious it is to wait on the Lord! What an abundant proof have +we in this donation, that all our late straits, as it regards means, +were only allowed for the trial of our faith! This evening came in +still further 1l. 5s. + +Dec. 9. Since Dec. 4 several small donations have come in, so that +unto the last day of this fourth year of the Orphan-work the Lord has +continued His kindness to us. + +On Dec. 10, 11, and 12 we had public meetings, at which the account +of the Lord's dealings with us in reference to the Orphan-Houses and +the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution was given. +During the whole of the past year, as formerly, the labourers who are +engaged in the work had kept their trials and their joys of faith to +themselves; but now we considered the time to have come, when, for +the benefit of the church at large, and to the glory of our Lord, we +should make our boast in Him.--It is now (i. e. on Dec. 10, 1839) five +years and nine months since the Scriptural Knowledge Institution has +been in operation. In addition to what has been said about the Lord's +dealings with us, more especially in regard to the funds, I make a +few more remarks, with reference to His kindness to us, in other +respects, during the last year. 1. During the last year also we have +been enabled to continue to provide all the needful expenses +connected with the six Day-Schools, three for boys and three for +girls. The number of the children, who are at present in them, +amounts to 286. The number of all the children that have had +schooling in the Day Schools, through the medium of the Institution, +since its formation, amounts to 1795. 2. There are at present 226 +children in the Sunday School. 3. There are 14 taught to read in the +Adult School, and there have been about 130 adults instructed in that +School, since the formation of the Institution. 4. There have been +circulated during the last year 514 copies of the Scriptures, and +5592 since March 5, 1834. 5. There has been laid out during the last +year 91l. 6s. for Missionary purposes. 6. There have been received +into the three Orphan-Houses from Dec. 9, 1838, to Dec. 9, 1839, 16 +orphans. There are at present 96 orphans in the three houses. The +number of all the orphans, who have been under our care from April +11, 1836, to Dec. 9, 1839, amounts to 126. + +I notice further the following points in connexion with the +Orphan-Houses. + +1. Without any one having been asked for any thing by us, the sum of +3,067l. 8s. 9 1/4d. has been given to us, entirely as the result of +prayer to God, from the commencement of the work up to Dec. 9, 1839. +2. Besides this, there have also been sent many articles of clothing, +furniture, and provisions, for the use of the Orphans. 3. Without our +solicitation, three medical gentlemen (one for each house), have up +to this time, kindly given their attendance and medicines +gratuitously. 4. The hand of God is most manifest in that we have had +so little sickness, considering that so many persons during this +autumn have been suffering from fever, etc. Even in this particular I +desire publicly to acknowledge the Lord's peculiar kindness to us. 5. +Though most of the children have been brought up in a very different +manner from what we could desire, yet the Lord has constrained them, +on the whole, during this year also, to behave exceedingly well, so +much so that it has continued to attract the attention of all +observers. 6. That, however, which gives us the chief ground for +thankfulness, so far as the children are concerned, is, that in eight +of them we perceive decided proofs of a real change of heart and of +faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, so that they have been received into +church fellowship. We are not surprised that these children, who are +from 9 years old and upwards, have been converted; for the conversion +of the orphans under our care has been a frequent subject of prayer +among us, and that of late more than ever; so that we fully expect, +if the Lord shall continue to give prayer for them, that soon many +more will be brought to believe in the Lord Jesus. + +The total of the expenses, connected with the objects of the +Institution, exclusive of the Orphan-Houses, from Nov. 19, 1838, to +Nov. 19, 1839, is 542l. 13s. The balance in hand on Nov. 19, 1839, +was 18s. 5d. The total of the expenses connected with the three +Orphan-Houses, from Dec. 9, 1838, to Dec. 9, 1839, is 960l. 9s. 2 +3/4d. The balance in hand on Dec 9, 1839, was 46l. 8s. ld. + +Dec. 24. This morning we wanted again more money for the Orphans than +there was in hand. It is only eight days since the last public +meeting, when there was a balance of 46l. 8s. ld. in hand. On this +account we disposed of some silver articles and books which had been +sent within the last days for the benefit of the Orphans, by which +means we have enough for today and tomorrow. + +Dec. 31. My health is much better than for years. My mental powers +also are as good as they have been at any time during the last three +years. I ascribe this to God's blessing, through the instrumentality +of early rising, and plunging my head into cold water when I rise. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1839. + + + +I. As to the church--68 brethren and sisters brother Craik and I +found in fellowship when we came to Bristol. + +573 have been admitted to fellowship since we came to Bristol. + +641 would be, therefore, the total number of those in fellowship with +us, had there been no changes. But + +40 have fallen asleep; + +33 are under church discipline + +55 saints have left Bristol; + +38 have left us, but are still in Bristol; + +166 are therefore to be deducted from 641, so that there are only 475 +at present in fellowship with us. + + + +During the last year have been added 115, of whom 34 have been +brought to the knowledge of the Lord among us. + + + +II. As to my temporal supplies. + +The Lord has been pleased to give me during the past year + +1. By the Freewill Offerings through the boxes L137 4s. 5d. + +2. By Presents in money, from saints residing in and out of Bristol +L121 18s. 0d. + +3. By Money through family connexion L42 0s. 0d. + +4. By Presents in clothes, provisions, &c., which were worth to us at +least L12 0s. 0d. + +Altogether L313 2s. 5d. + + + +January 1, 1840. Our usual meeting last night was most precious! We +continued together from seven till half-past twelve. Of all the +similar meetings which we have had, it was, according to my judgment, +by far the best. Not more than five prayed; but there was much more +real prayer than at former meetings.--This morning, about one hour +after midnight, when our prayer meeting was over, I received a paper +with some money sealed up in it for the Orphans. A few minutes +afterwards I remembered that the individual who gave it was in debt, +and I was aware she had been repeatedly asked by her creditors for +payment; I resolved therefore, with out opening the paper, to return +it, as no one has a right to give whilst in debt. This was done when +I knew that there was not enough in hand to meet the expences of the +day. About eight this morning a brother brought 5l., which he had +received just then from his mother, for the Orphans. Observe, the +brother is led to bring it at once! The Lord knew our need, and +therefore this brother could not delay bringing the money. A few +hours after I received 5l. more, and 8s. 5d., also 2s. 6d., so that +we are now again supplied for three or four days. + +Jan. 5. Besides the 10l. 10s. 11d, which came in on New-year's day, +there came in on the 2nd and 4th 3l. 0s. 7d. But when now we were +again without a penny, there came in 5s., and 6d., and 1s. Also 2l. +with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, and 1l. 10s. for rent. + +Jan. 7. Today, when there were again only a few shillings in hand, as +since the 5th had come in only 3s., I gave myself to prayer, when, +just after I had risen from my knees, a sister came and brought 1l., +as a thank-offering to the Lord for the many mercies of the past +year. There came in still further today, by ten different donations +and the sale of two Reports, 2l. 17s. + +Jan. 8. There were only a few shillings more in hand than was needed +for housekeeping today. Nevertheless our kind Father remembered us +before the day was over. A sister, a servant, gave me 15s.; also with +Ecclesiastes ix. 10, came in 5l. 5s., from two sisters 6s, ld., and +by sale of Reports 3s. + +Jan. 22. I have repeatedly asked the Lord for means to be able to +order more Bibles, as two sorts were again exhausted. There is +moreover scarcely enough money in hand to pay the teachers next +Saturday. This afternoon I received from a sister 14l. 2s. 7d., which +she had had in the Savings' Bank. She considered that this money +would be better used in the Lord's work, than left in the Savings' +Bank. Thus I was enabled to order some Bibles. + +From Jan. 8th to 22nd came in 34l. 9s. 5d. for the Orphans, and the +donations were so seasonable, that always either something was given, +or articles which had been given for sale could be disposed of, +before the last money had been expended. But as there was today again +only very little in hand, I was led to open the orphan-box in my +house, in which I found two papers, the one containing 10s., the +other a 5l. note. In both papers was written Eccles. ix. 10. There +came in today still further above 5l. Thus our Lord has sent us what +we are likely to need for three or four days to come. + +Jan. 25. I have been much in prayer this week about going to Germany: +1, To see certain brethren who purpose to go as Missionaries to the +East Indies; and 2, To see my father once more. I am led to go just +now, instead of delaying it, because my health is again so failing, +that it seems desirable I should leave Bristol at all events, and +thus I could continue to serve in the work of the Lord, and yet +attend to the benefit of my health at the same time. Lord, keep me +from making a mistake in this matter! + +Jan, 31, Since Jan. 22 several small donations came in for the +Orphans, and several pounds by the sale of silver articles, trinkets, +&c. But as I have had to pay out today 11l. 13s., we are now again +very poor. For many days past we have been so helped, that money has +always come in, before all was spent. Now there is only 1s. 5d. in +hand. The Lord will provide! I feel quite comfortable, though in +three days I shall have to leave the work for several week.--About +three hours after I had written the above, came in 1l. 14s. l 1/2d. +In the afternoon I received still further from Tottenham for the +Orphans 10l., and in the evening from Hereford 30l., of which latter +sum there was 6l. for the Orphans, and 24l. for the other objects of +the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. Thus the Lord will kindly allow +me to leave a little money behind on my departure, and I have also a +still further answer to my prayer for means to purchase Bibles, for +which I have asked the Lord repeatedly, and which he began to answer +by the donation which I received on the 22nd. I have received 5l. +besides for the other objects. + +Feb. 1. I have now felt quite sure for several days past, that I +should leave Bristol for a season, and go to Germany. If the Lord +permit, I shall leave the day after tomorrow. + +Feb. 2. Today and yesterday has come in still further, before my +departure, nearly 9l. for the Orphans. How kind of the Lord to send +this money just now, on the eve of my leaving home! + +Feb. 3. Today I left Bristol for Berlin. + +On Feb. 5th I left London in the steamer for Hamburg. Though it had +been so very stormy for several weeks past, the Lord gate us a very +favourable passage; the first, as the captain said, which they had +had for several weeks. We landed at Hamburg on the 7th at five in the +afternoon. The porter who carried my things led me, as I afterwards +found out, some by-way, either to save a long distance, or to get me +into the city with my luggage, though it was after the custom-house +hours. I did not understand this at first; but, when we were about to +enter the city, he told me that that was not the proper way, but that +if I would give to the custom-house officer, whom I should presently +see at the entrance into the city, a small fee, he would let me pass. +My reply was that I did not wish to do what was unlawful, nor should +I give a fee to encourage what was unlawful, and that I would rather +go a long way round, than get by such means into the city. Presently +we arrived at the place at which the custom-house officer stood, who, +on my telling him plainly that I had not the least wish to pass that +way, if it were unlawful, saw that I was only a passenger, and that I +had no wish to get into the city with goods which are not duty free, +and therefore let me pass. This little circumstance proves afresh in +how many little things the children of God may act differently from +the world, to the glory of their Father, and how in going the Lord's +way, we find it to be, even as far as this life is concerned, the +easiest path.--About half an hour after, when I arrived at the hotel, +a little circumstance served afresh to remind me, that the Christian, +like the bee, might suck honey out of every flower. I saw upon a +snuffer-stand in bas-relief, "A heart, a cross under it, and roses +under both." The meaning was obviously this, that the heart which +bears the cross for a time meets with roses afterwards. I applied it +to myself, and this little event greatly cheered my heart in this +place, where I was without the fellowship of a single believer. + +I left Hamburg in the evening of Feb. 8th, travelled all night, all +day, and the whole of the second night, and reached Berlin on the +morning of the 10th. I confessed not the Lord Jesus on this long +journey, which I record here to my shame; nor did I give any other +testimony for Jesus in the steamer, than merely refraining from the +light and trifling conversation of the party, and all this after I +had had on my way from Bristol to London a fresh encouragement in +conversing with a gay traveller addicted to drinking, who evidently +listened with a measure of attention, and with a desire of having his +chains broken. + +From Feb. 10th to 20th I was in Berlin. I think it is likely that +eight or nine brethren and sisters will go from hence to the East +Indies.--After having been greatly helped by the Lord in my work, the +first and special object of my journey to the Continent; mercifully +kept by Him in the narrow path and in great peace, whilst surrounded +with temptations on every side; and after having also seen afresh +abundant reason to praise the Lord for all the way in which He had +led me since I lived here in 1828 and 1829; I left Berlin on the +evening of Feb. 20th for Magdeburg, which I reached on the morning of +the 21st, and on the same evening I arrived at my father's house.--In +all human probability I now see my dear father the last time. He is +evidently much weaker than he was two years ago, and coughs much +more. What has the Lord done for me since I lived in the house where +I am now! The two rooms where I am now most in prayer, reading the +Word, and confessing His name, were those very rooms in which I +sinned most, whilst living here many years ago. I have had again +opportunity, most fully to bring out the truth about the work of the +Lord Jesus before my father, whilst conversing a long time with a +woman in his hearing, to whom I showed from the Scriptures, that we +are to be saved, not by our own works, but simply by faith in the +Lord Jesus, who bore the punishment instead of us, and who fulfilled +the law in our room. + +Feb. 24 and 25. I am still at Heimersleben. My dear father is very +weak. + +Feb. 26. This morning I left Heimersleben. I took leave of my father +most probably for the last time. It has been a great pleasure to me, +and I consider it a great privilege, to have been permitted by the +Lord once more to see my father, once more personally to show him +filial love and regard, and once more to set the truth before him. He +has been again during the whole of this my stay most affectionate to +me, as he was during my two former visits to him since I left the +Continent to reside in England. How cheerfully should I have left him +this morning, did I know him to be safe in Jesus! But, alas! he as +yet is not resting upon Christ, though he is so far religious as to +read prayers and the Bible.--After I had left him I went to my +faithful and beloved friend, brother Stahlschmidt, at Sandersleben, +but found him absent from home. + +Brother Kroll, the servant of brother Stahlschmidt, [whom I have +mentioned in the first part of my Narrative,] received me with much +affection. When this brother first came to Sandersleben in 1829, +there was scarcely a single true Christian besides his master in the +little town. Soon afterwards he began to hold meetings, which were +attended by the two or three who loved the Lord Jesus. These meetings +were for a long time suffered to go on quietly; but when the Lord +blessed them, and others were stirred up to care about their souls, +brother Kroll had to appear before the magistrates, and was forbidden +to hold them. When this was of no effect, (as he considered that he +ought only to obey earthly rulers in things in which he could do so +with a good conscience,) and they continued still to meet together, +the police came into one of their meetings, and forced them to +discontinue it. When even this availed nothing, the brethren were +finally threatened that every one who attended these meetings should +pay three thalers, and every one who read or spoke at them should pay +five, which is a large sum in Germany for poor people. But +notwithstanding all these obstacles, the few poor saints continue +their meetings, but in secret, to be unmolested by the police. They +have now neither a stated place nor a fixed time for their meetings. +On the second and third evenings, whilst I was at Sandersleben, I met +with them. On the second evening we were in the room of a poor +weaver. The dear brethren would have me sit on the only chair which +was in the room. It was a very small room, perhaps twice as large as +the loom, which was in it. There were about twenty-five or thirty +persons present, many of whom had seated themselves in and under the +loom, and the rest sat on two or three little forms. These meetings +were very precious. The very fact of going to them with the feeling +of having to pay the fine, or to suffer an adequate imprisonment, +should one be found there, makes them to be doubly valued; and I +believe that the Lord's double blessing rests upon them. I spoke long +both times; indeed, as long as I had strength, and the dear people +seemed to eat the Word.--I have so circumstantially related these +facts, that thereby the children of God in Great Britain may be led +more highly to value their religious privileges, and to make good use +of them whilst they are continued. + +It is worthy of remark, that while the meeting at Sandersleben were +permitted to continue, there was no believing clergyman in the little +town; but about the time that they were forbidden, the Lord sent a +brother who truly preaches the gospel. I had for some hours refeshing +and most affectionate brotherly intercourse with Him. May the Lord +let His blessing rest upon him, and help him to be a faithful witness +for God in that dark neighbourhood! + +I had travelled so fast, and stayed so short a time in the places +where I had been, that I was obliged to leave Heimersleben without +having received the letter which I had expected from my wife there, a +matter of no small trial (as those who have been for some time at a +great distance from home, know it to be); especially in my case, as, +on account of the Orphans and the other work, besides my family, it +was of so much importance for me to hear from time to time. I had +arranged with my father to have the letter sent to me to +Sandersleben, by an express messenger, who could be obtained for a +small remuneration. However, hour after hour passed away, on the +27th, and the messenger did not arrive. At last the time was gone by, +as it was getting dark, and the person ought to have come at noon. I +now lifted up my heart to the Lord, beseeching Him to give me grace +to give up my own will in this thing. No sooner had I been brought +into such a state, as to be TRULY content and satisfied with the will +of the Lord in this matter, than the expected letter was handed over +to me. The woman who brought it had lost her way in the morning, on +account of a dense fog, which made her so late. I have frequently +found, under similar circumstances, that after I had been brought +into such a state as to be willing to give up my own will, whereby I +was fitted to bear the blessing, the Lord gave me the desire of my +heart, according to the truth of that word: "Delight thyself also in +the Lord, and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart." Psalm +xxxvii. 4. + +Feb. 29. This morning I left Sandersleben. Towards the evening I +reached Halberstadt, the town where I was from Easter 1816 to June +1821, at the Cathedral Classical School. I went to a certain small +inn, known to me from the time that I lived at Halberstadt, both for +the sake of quietness and to save expense, as I knew it to be more +like a private boarding-house than an inn. After having had my +supper, the innkeeper, who seemed to me a quiet and unassuming +person, came into the room where I was, and began conversation with +me. After a few moments I recognised in him a former schoolfellow of +mine. The Lord now enabled me to tell him of my gay life, my +conversion, my subsequent going to England, and of some of the Lord's +dealings with me there. He listened with great attention, and was +evidently affected by what I said. May the Lord bless to him my +testimony for Jesus! I was thus afresh reminded of what grace has +done for me. How kind of the Lord to direct me to that place! + +March 1. This morning I saw an old friend of mine, a missionary to +the Jews at Halberstadt. When first he went there he held meetings, +which the few Christians of the town attended; but of late he has +been obliged by the police to give them up. In that town of about +15,000 inhabitants, with, I think, seven large Protestant churches, +there is not one converted clergyman, as this brother told me; and +the few Christians that are there are not permitted to assemble +themselves together. Brethren, you who live in Great Britain, be +thankful for your religious liberty, and make use of it while the +days of outward peace last!--About twelve this morning I left by the +mail for Brunswick. The Lord enabled me to preach Christ to a young +man, a painter, who, for the sake of improvement in his art, had +travelled far and wide, and was now returning home from Vienna to his +parents. He listened very attentively, in which I had a fresh proof +that one never ought to look at natural appearances in proclaiming +the truth; for I judged, before I began to speak to him, from his gay +appearance, that he would quite laugh at what I might tell him about +Jesus.--I saw again this afternoon, at Wolfenbuttel the inn from +whence I ran away, when in debt, in the year 1821, and praised the +Lord for His goodness to me since that time. Now, this evening, I am +at Brunswick, and shall have again, through the Lord's kindness, rest +during the night, as the mail does not leave for Hamburg until nine +tomorrow morning. + +March 8. London. I left Brunswick on the 2nd, and arrived at Hamburg +in 24 hours. As there was ice in the Elbe, the London steamer could +not get up to Hamburg, and I had therefore to go alone, in a hired +carriage to Cuxhaven, about eighty miles, the most expensive journey +that ever I made in my life, for it cost above 3l. 10s. Thus I had to +travel three days and two nights, with the interruption of only five +hours at Hamburg. I reached Cuxhaven at half-past eight in the +evening on March 4th.--The fact of having thus to travel from Hamburg +to Cuxhaven, that being the only way in which I could have got there +in my circumstances, without losing the steamer, showed me afresh how +one is step by step cast upon the Lord. A month since the Elbe was +cleared of ice, and now, contrary to the expectation of all, the cold +had returned to such a degree, that it was a second time innavigable. + +March 3. I embarked this morning for London. I had conversation with +two Russian Jews, who listened with great interest to all I said to +them; but I did not tell them plainly that I believed Jesus of +Nazareth to be the Messiah, as I fully purposed to do at the next +conversation. After I had left them, they conversed with each other, +and I could see from their countenances, that they either took me for +a baptized Jew, or for a missionary to the Jews, on account of the +peculiar way in which I had conversed with them. Presently one of +them came and asked me what I thought of that Jesus. No sooner had I +owned Him as the true Messiah and as my Lord and my God, than he +began to blaspheme; and from that time, as long as we were on board, +they shunned me; and I also felt that all I had to do was to show +kindness to them by actions, but no more to converse with them about +the Messiah, in order to keep them from blaspheming that holy name +which is dear to my heart. My conversation with them had, however, an +unexpected effect in another way. At the dinner table I was asked by +one of the passengers about those Jews, who they were, etc., as my +long conversation with them on the deck had been noticed. This led +me, (in order that the conversation might be turned to profitable +subjects, and that I might discover whether there was a Christian at +the table), to throw out the remark, "how remarkable it is that the +Jews, in all parts of the world, can be recognised as such; and are +not mixed with other nations," etc. Immediately the captain replied, +"this can only be explained by the Scriptures, and shows the Bible to +be true," or something to that effect. I now, in agreeing with the +captain, followed up the subject, and both after dinner and +repeatedly during the passage had long and most interesting +conversations with the captain, whom I found to be a true brother in +the Lord, and from whom I separated most affectionately on our +arrival in London. + +On March 7th I landed in London, where I found two letters from my +dear wife, from which I saw that up to the last the Lord had been +dealing with her, as well as with me, in the greatest kindness, and +had given also an abundance for the Orphans during the whole time of +my absence. + +March 9. I left London this morning, arrived this evening in peace in +Bristol, and found my dearest Mary and all in peace. Truly, the Lord +has abundantly blessed me and them while I have been from home! + +During the whole time of my absence the Lord not only supplied all +the need of the Orphans, but on my return I found more in hand than +there was when I left. The donations, which came in during my +absence, amount to between 80l. and 90l. + +March 11. Today I received 19l. 19s., being a legacy left to me by a +brother who fell asleep the beginning of last December. How richly +does the Lord supply all my own temporal necessities! + +March 22. Today, when there was not a penny in hand for the Orphans, +I received the following donations: 3l. as the produce of the sale of +ladies' baskets, an old crown piece, an old half-crown piece, and a +Spanish dollar. Also 1s. With Eccles. ix. 10, was given 2l. 10s. + +March 23. Today came in still further 1l. 2s. 6d. + +March 25. All money was now again given out, when today came in by +the sale of Reports 8s. 9d., and in small donations 1l. 5s. 11d. + +March 26. On the 17th of this month 1 received the following letter, +from a brother who several times had been used by the Lord as an +instrument in supplying our need, and who also two months since sent +30l. + +"I have received a little money from ----. Have you any present need +for the Institution under your care? I know you do not ask, except +indeed of Him whose work you are doing; but to answer when asked +seems another thing, and a right thing. I have a reason for desiring +to know the present state of your means towards the objects you are +labouring to serve: viz, should you not have need, other departments +of the Lord's work or other people of the Lord may have need. Kindly +then inform me, and to what amount, i. e. what amount you at this +present time need, or can profitably lay out." + +At the time when this letter came, we were indeed in need, or at +least it was desirable, as far as I had light, to have means, as I +was just on the point of establishing an Infant-School, and as again +some sorts of Bibles were needed in order to go on with the +circulation of the Scriptures. Also in the Orphan-Fund there was only +2s. 3 1/2d. Nevertheless I considered that, as I have hitherto acted, +(i. e. telling the Lord alone about our need), I ought to continue to +do, as otherwise the principal object of the work, to be a help to +the saints generally, by seeking to lead them to increased dependence +upon God alone, through this Institution, would be frustrated. I +answered therefore the letter, in substance, as follows: + +"Whilst I thank you for your love, and whilst I agree with you, that, +in general, there is a difference between asking for money, and +answering when asked, nevertheless in our case I feel not at liberty +to speak about the state of our funds, as the primary object of the +work in my hands is, to lead those who are weak in faith to see that +there is reality in dealing with God alone." + +After having sent off the answer, I was again and again led to pray +to the Lord in this way: "Lord, thou knowest that for Thy sake I did +not tell this brother about our need. Now, Lord, show afresh that +there is reality in speaking to Thee only about our need, and speak +therefore to this brother, so that he may help us." + +Today, in answer to this my request, this brother sent 100l., of +which sum I shall take 20l. for the Orphans, and 20l.. for each of +the other objects. Thus I have means for establishing the +Infant-School, and for ordering more Bibles. Also the Orphans are +again supplied for a week; for when the money came in there was not +one penny in hand for them. + +April 7. This evening I received information from my little half +brother that my dear father died on March 30th. He was taken worse a +few days after I left him. How kind of the Lord to have allowed me +once more to see him! Had I gone to Germany at the time I first +intended, he would most likely not have been alive to see me.--As I +know not of one believer in the whole town where he lived, I cannot +for a certainty ascertain any thing about his state before his death; +but that which I do know gives me no proof of his having died in the +faith of Christ. As to myself, I am sure of this, that it becomes me +to adore that wonderful grace which plucked me as a brand out of the +burning, and to say in reference to my dear departed father: "Shall +not the judge of all the earth do right?" and in submission to the +will of God to be satisfied with His dealings. This, through grace, I +am able to do. Every true believer who has unconverted parents, for +whose spiritual welfare he is concerned, can understand what joy it +would have been to me to have heard a satisfactory account of a true +change of heart in my dear father before his end; but as it has been +otherwise, I know nevertheless that God will be eternally glorified +even in this dispensation. During no period did I pray more +frequently or more earnestly for the conversion of my dear aged +parent, than during the last year of his life; but, at all events, it +did not please the Lord to let me see the answer to my prayers. + +April 9. Through the 20l. which came in on March 26, and a number of +smaller and larger donations since then, we have had for the last +twelve days more than usual. But now today our means were again +reduced to 7s. 10d., when the Lord sent in 5l. through a brother in +Bristol, who during this year also, as at former times, has been the +instrument in the hands of God of repeatedly supplying our need when +we were very poor. + +We are on the point of sending some money to the East Indies for +Missionary objects. Whilst I was on my knees respecting this object, +5l. was brought for it. + +April 10. Today came in still further for the Orphans, with Eccles. +ix. 10, 5l.; also 2l. + +April 19. For several months past it had appeared to brother Craik +and me, and to several other brethren who help us in the work of +caring for the saints, that a part of the church meeting together at +Gideon Chapel was a hinderance to our giving that clear and distinct +testimony respecting the principles on which we meet, which we desire +to give to the world and to the church at large in this city. As the +Lord, however, had so abundantly blessed our labours in that place, +in the conversion of sinners, and also in the building up of many +saints, we felt that we ought to act in this matter with the greatest +prayerfulness and consideration; and we had therefore many meetings +for prayer and deliberation with several brethren. On this account it +was likewise, that though we came as early as the 17th of January to +the conclusion that it would be better to relinquish Gideon as a +meeting place, we still deferred the matter for two months and a half +longer, before we even mentioned our difficulties publicly. At last, +on March 30th, we assembled with all the saints, and brother Craik +and I stated to them our difficulties. The following is the substance +of what was stated at the meeting. + + + +Brief statement of certain difficulties connected with our continuing +to retain the occupancy of Gideon Chapel, Newfoundland Street, +Bristol. + + + +In order to enter into the force of the following particulars, it is +necessary to keep in mind the position which, as a body of saints, we +seem called upon to maintain, in this city, before the church and the +world. We meet simply as believers in Christ, without reference to +any sectarian distinction, maintaining the Scriptures as our only +rule of doctrine and discipline, and affording freedom for the +exercise of any spiritual gift which the Lord may be pleased to +bestow. We thus hold out a gathering place for all who believe in the +Lord Jesus, and desire to confess His name, by obedience to His +authority. Whatever impedes us, in this our great work, can only be +suffered to continue, if the Lord Himself lays it upon us as a burden +or chastisement. Nothing but necessity can justify our putting any +obstacles in the way of the saints in this city, who, feeling the +obligation of separating from every sectarian bond of union, would +desire to meet with us. + + + +I. + + + +1. There seems no sufficient reason for holding our Lord's day +morning meetings, for the breaking of bread, in two different places. +See 1 Cor. xi. 20. The number is not too large to assemble in one +place, and the extent of locality is not so great as to prevent it, +except in the ease of invalids or of very aged persons: and the +disadvantages of two meeting places are very serious. In this way of +meeting the gifts are needlessly divided, as the gifted brethren are +in two places instead of one; discipline is rendered very difficult +to be executed, as it can scarcely be ascertained who absent +themselves, etc.; and impediments are thrown in the way of mutual +intercourse and acquaintance, as the saints sometimes go to the one +place, and sometimes to the other. + +2. There are only four ways in which we can so arrange as to assemble +every Lord's day morning, as a church, together. a, Bethesda may be +given up, and the meeting of the saints maybe at Gideon. b, The +meetings maybe alternately at each place. c, The meetings may be held +at a third place intermediate, in respect of locality, between the +two. d, Gideon may be given up, and Bethesda alone become the place +of meeting for breaking of bread. + +--In regard to the first two of these four arrangements, the size of +Gideon puts a complete obstacle in the way, as there would not be +sufficient room, were the saints and others, who would still attend, +to meet together in that place. The third plan appears to be freest +from all objections, could it be accomplished; but there is no one +other place to be obtained sufficiently large for our purpose, and +therefore, if it be granted that the profit of the saints and the +glory of Christ seem to require our having one gathering place, till +the number of the saints and the extent of locality on which they +reside shall force us to have more than one: the only way in which, +for the present, this can be accomplished is by our relinquishing +Gideon, and having Bethesda as our only place of meeting.6 + + + +II. + + + +But the above are not the only reasons why we should no longer +continue to retain Gideon as a meeting place for the church.--We have +reason to believe that several of our dear brethren, who have been in +the habit of assembling there for worship, do not see with us in +reference to the great leading principles on which we professedly +meet. Ever since the removal of any restraint upon the exercise of +whatever gift the Spirit may bestow, in connexion with the practice +of weekly communion at Gideon, there has been dissatisfaction on the +part of some. A few have left and gone to other places, some have +been in the habit of remaining only as long as there is teaching or +exhortation, and then leaving without breaking bread. We have reason +to believe that several do not, in heart, acknowledge us as taught of +God in regard to the changes, which we have introduced; or, if they +feel unwilling to say so, yet they are inclined to retain their old +way. Now, spiritual rule can only be continued over those who yield +willing subjection: an unwilling submission on the part of those who +are in the place "of the ruled," we deem no true subjection at all. +Therefore, those who do not believe that matters are conducted +amongst us in a Scriptural way, cannot comfortably continue in +fellowship with us: and by yielding up to them the use of the Chapel, +we take away all just cause of complaint.--On account of these +reasons there would be no need of leaving a meeting place under other +circumstances; but as, when brother Craik and I came to Gideon +Chapel, we found saints there assembled together in fellowship who +had contributed towards the purchasing and fitting up of the Chapel, +and who had been in the habit of meeting together on different +principles, it seems not Christlike either to force our light upon +them, or to constrain them to leave us; but to give up the Chapel to +them, as they do not, in heart, go along with us. It cannot be +expected that, for the sake of pleasing even those whom we love in +Christ, we should shrink back from carrying out any truth which the +Lord may lead us into; and, therefore, if our brethren cannot +heartily go along with us, it is better that nothing should be +imposed upon them contrary to their convictions. If it should be said +that for the sake of a few we thus separate from many: our reply is, +that we separate from none of the saints; we only withdraw from a +building, because it appears to us a hinderance to the manifesting of +the truth, and, at the same time hold out a gathering place for all +who feel that it would be for the edification of their souls, and the +glory of God, that they should continue to meet with us. We invite +all those who conscientiously can submit to the order which obtains +amongst us, to continue in fellowship with us; and we purpose to +provide a place of meeting to suit the convenience of the feeble and +aged who would feel the distance of Bethesda to be an obstacle to +their meeting habitually with the saints there. + + + +III. + + + +But in addition to those already mentioned, there is a third class of +difficulties connected with retaining Gideon. The present character +of the meeting for the breaking of bread there, is very far from +fully exhibiting the principles on which we meet together. +Unbelievers sitting among the saints, hinders our appearing to meet +for the breaking of bread, and renders it necessary that a disturbing +pause should intervene between the act of breaking bread and the +other part of the meeting. We cannot have the breaking of bread at +the commencement of the meeting, because of the confusion occasioned +by the intermixture of those who are not in fellowship with us. To +alter this, and to request all who are not in fellowship with us +(except those belonging to the families of the saints) to sit by +themselves, as is the case at Bethesda, would, we fear, produce +increased dissatisfaction. Such a request moreover would not be +Christlike, as long as from the construction of the building no +comfortable sittings were reserved for any besides the saints +themselves. Thus, by retaining Gideon, we are under the necessity of +either marring our testimony to the church at large, or of deepening +the dissatisfaction prevalent among several who are already in +fellowship with us.--Again, the very construction of the place renders +it unsuitable for a meeting of saints. Part of the sittings being +pews, necessarily tends to give the appearance of a distinction +between the very poor and the more respectable class. This +distinction would need to be done away, and we have every reason to +fear that some might feel personally aggrieved by the pews being +taken away and replaced with benches. We have only of late understood +that some of the pews are looked upon as private property. This is +such a violation of the statement that the sittings are all free, +that it could no longer be permitted. To require these unscriptural +practices to be renounced, we have reason to apprehend, would be +considered as an arbitrary act of rule, and might alienate the minds +of those of our dear brethren who are still, in heart, attached to +that to which they hare been accustomed in former years. + +If it can be shown that the above difficulties are capable of being +removed, or that any greater evil would attend the yielding up of +Gideon than the evils which necessarily accompany our retaining it, +then we are bound not to give it up. But, according to our present +light, we see no way of reconciling the two objects, viz.: the +retaining of Gideon, and the exhibiting a full, unhindered testimony +to the truth of God. We repeat it, that we do not separate from any +single individual in fellowship with us, we only leave the walls of a +building, and invite those who feel called upon to separate from +every sectarian system, and to meet where free exercise is afforded +for every spiritual gift, to assemble with us at Bethesda. + +In the case of those who are in ordinary health, the inconvenience +attending the locality of Bethesda is a matter of very little +consequence. Half an hour's earlier rising on the morning of the +Lord's day, would be sufficient, in most cases, fully to meet the +difficulty; and the consciousness, that the glory of Jesus and the +true welfare of His church were thereby promoted, would far more than +compensate for the amount of self-denial which the inconvenience +arising from the distance would impose.--In reference to the weak, +the sickly, and the very aged, who reside in the neigbourhood of +Gideon, we trust, in the strength of the Lord, to make such ample +provision for their comfort on the Lord's day, that they may have no +reason to regret that Gideon has been relinquished. Lastly, as it +regards the opportunities which will be lost, by giving up Gideon, of +proclaiming the truth among believers, as well as preaching the +gospel to the world, we intend, according to our ability and the +measure of gift amongst us, to open places for those purposes in +different parts of the city. + + + +After we had fully stated our minds respecting our difficulties in +continuing to meet, as a church, at Gideon Chapel, we were still +quite willing to continue to occupy it as a preaching place, provided +the brethren whose property the Chapel was (because of their having +contributed towards the purchase and fitting up of the building,) +were perfectly satisfied with our doing so. If this had been the +case, all the difference would have been, that on Lord's day mornings +Gideon Chapel would have been shut, and all the church would have met +at Bethesda; but we should have been willing not only to preach in +Gideon on the Lord's day evenings, and once or twice in the week, but +also on the Lord's day afternoons instead of the morning meeting: so +that even the unconverted, or the believers of that neighbourhood, +who are not in communion with us, should have been no losers.--Whilst +nothing was stated by any one, that showed us we had been mistaken in +the conclusion to which we had come, a point was mentioned which soon +brought the matter to a final decision. It was said that the giving +up of one of the principal meetings on the Lord's day would be +against the spirit of the trust deeds, as the Chapel was particularly +intended to be a preaching place. Now, though we did not see it to be +thus, as we meant to preach the Word, as before, at Gideon, if it +could be done in perfect harmony with the owners of it; yet it seemed +beyond a question that we could not retain the Chapel, whilst we +appeared, even in the least to alienate the property from the use for +which it was said to have been intended. We, therefore, were +confirmed by this in our conclusion to give up the Chapel at once, +and that entirely. [In order that the aged and infirm, and invalids +who live in the neighbourhood of Gideon, might not be losers by the +change, cars were provided, at the expense of the church, to convey +them to the meeting for the breaking of bread at Bethesda; and a +Chapel was rented in Callow-hill Street, near Gideon, in which, on +the Lord's day and Thursday evenings the Word was ministered, It was +very kind of the Lord to order it so that this chapel was at once to +be had! Two years and a half afterwards, in October, 1842, we rented +a still more suitable Chapel, in the heart of the City. On April +19th, 1840, we preached for the last time at Gideon, after having +laboured there, with abundant blessing, for about eight years. Only +three saints, as far as I know, out of about 250, who used to meet +with us at Gideon, remained there. Nor has the Lord ceased to bless +our labours since we left.] + +April 27. Monday. The Lord knew that we were penniless, and should be +in need of fresh supplies today for the Orphans, therefore He moved +the hearts of some of His children to remember us, in answer to our +prayer. Yesterday I received with Eccles. ix. 10, 5l., and 10s. from +a sister who had lent this sum to some one, but never expected it +again; and now, having unexpectedly received it, gave it to the Lord +for the Orphans. 1l. 10s. was given for the rent of the +Orphan-Houses. There was 2s. 6d. put anonymously into the box at +Bethesda, and also 1l. This morning I was informed that 5l. had been +sent to the Infant-Orphan-House. Thus the Lord has given for our need +13l. 2s. 6d. + +Let us pause here a few moments, beloved reader! Let us adore the +Lord's kindness! See how seasonably the Lord sends the help. As our +need is, so He remembers us. It is not now and then that He is +mindful of us, but continually. As surely as we stand in need of any +thing, He sends it; be it money, provisions, clothes, or any thing +else. We may be allowed to be poor, yea, very poor; we may have to +pray again and again to our Father before the answer comes; we may be +reduced so as to have from mal to meal to wait upon Him; yea, +according to all outward appearance, the Lord may seem to have +forgotten us:--but, amidst it all, as surely as we really need any +thing, in His own time and way does He send help. Perhaps you may +say; "But how would you do, in case there were a mealtime to come and +you had no provisions for the children, or they really wanted +clothes, and you had no money to procure them?" Our answer is, such a +thing is impossible as long as the Lord shall give us grace to trust +in Him, (for "whosoever believeth on Him shall not be ashamed,") and +as long as He shall enable us to carry on the work in uprightness of +heart. But should we be ever so left to ourselves as to forsake the +Lord and trust in an arm of flesh, or should we regard iniquity in +our heart i. e. wilfully and habitually do any thing, either in +connexion with the work or otherwise, which is against the will of +God, then we may pray and utter many words before Him, but He will +not hear us, as it is written: "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the +Lord will not hear me." Psalm lxvi. 18. I, therefore, beseech all who +love our Lord Jesus and who may read this, to entreat Him on behalf +of all of us who are engaged in this work, that He would be pleased +to continue to give us faith, and that He would keep us from living +in sin. + +May 2. Nothing having come in for five days, we were today again +penniless. In answer to prayer 5s. 6d. came in, and some trinkets +were sent, the names of which the donor does not wish to be known. +Thus we were helped through this day.--Observe here, how the Lord +allowed five days to pass away without influencing the hearts of any +to send us supplies; but the moment there is real need, the stream +runs again. + +May 3. Today the Lord sent in again some money for the Orphans. He +knew we were penniless, and therefore answered our requests. Besides +1l. 10s. for rent, there came in 1l. 1s. from London, and 2l. from +the Isle of Wight. + +May 4. By what came in yesterday, we were supplied for today; but the +Lord sent today still more, as that which came in yesterday was only +enough for today. There was given in money 7l., of which 3l. was the +profit of the sale of ladies' baskets, which are made by some sisters +in the Lord for the benefit of the Orphans. + +Last evening a brother was baptized, who on the first Lord's day of +this year came with his intended wife to Bethesda Chapel. Both were +in an unconverted state. They both were at the same meeting, through +what brother Craik said, made to feel the power of the truth, and, in +consequence, were led to Jesus and found peace in Him, and are now +both in communion with us.--The Lord still condescends to use us as +instruments. Today we conversed with seven persons about fellowship, +and had to send away five, being worn out after we had seen the +seven, one after the other. Only since April 1st, forty-one persons +have come to us to speak about their souls. May the Lord in mercy +give us helpers in the work, for truly the harvest is great; and may +not our ingratitude for His abundant blessing upon our labours oblige +Him to shut up His hands from continuing to use us! + +May 6th. This evening I received 10l. for the Orphans, and 10l. for +the Infant-School, which we are on the point of opening. Before our +little stock is quite exhausted, (for there is yet 2l. left for the +Orphans) the Lord has thus kindly sent a fresh supply. Thus also my +prayer is answered in being able to give to two of the sisters in the +Orphan-Houses some money for their personal expenses. + +May 8. There are four believers staying at my house, and today we had +only a few shillings of our own money left. I gave myself, therefore, +to prayer for means for our own personal expenses. In answer to my +request, I received this morning 5l. + +May 10. Today five of the Orphans were received into fellowship and +baptized. There are now fourteen of them in fellowship. + +May 16. The need of today, as we were again penniless, led us to open +the boxes in the Orphan-Houses, in which 2l. 0s. 2d. was found. There +was given 5s. besides. In the evening came in still further a +sovereign from a sister, a servant, with the following lines: The +Lord has put it into my heart to send a sovereign to the Orphans. He +indeed put it into my heart, which was once at enmity with God and +would have said, lay it by, you may want it when you are old; but +then I could not look towards heaven and say, I know my Heavenly +Father will supply all my need; neither could I say, 'Abba, Father,' +for I knew Him not." + +May 17. Today the Lord has sent a little more, so that we have enough +to meet the demands of tomorrow. There came in altogether 3l. 9s. 6d. + +May 22. Several small donations enabled us to supply the necessities +of the last four days. When this day commenced, however, there was +again not a penny in hand. But my eyes were directed to the Lord, and +therefore my heart was at peace; I was fully assured that He would +help this day also. About eleven I was informed that there was 19s. +3d. in hand, being the produce of the boys' knitting, and that also +some old clothes, given for sale, had been sold for 3s. 6d., and one +Report besides for 3d. To this one of the labourers added 4s. of his +own, and gave a book besides for sale. Thus we had 1l. 7s., which was +enough to meet the demands of this day. + +May 26. By the sale of 166 little books which had been given to be +disposed of, by a few shillings which came in for the children's +needlework, by 4s. which had been taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, by a little money given by one of the labourers, by +10s. which came anonymously in a letter, and by the sale of some +Reports--we were able to meet the demands since the 22nd. Today there +was 1l. 2s. 8d. left in hand, but this was not quite enough for the +need of the day. In the afternoon came in for needlework 11s. 6d., +and there was 5s. left at the Infant-Orphan House. Thus we had +enough, and a few shillings left for tomorrow. + +May 26. Nothing had come in. My engagements kept me from going to the +Orphan-Houses till seven in the evening, when the labourers met +together for prayer. When we met I found that one of them had given +l7s., which had been divided between the three houses. This, with the +little which had been left yesterday, had procured all necessary +articles. We are now very poor. + +May 27. We met for prayer, at eleven this morning. No money had come +in, but there was enough for dinner in all the houses. This morning +the LAST COALS were used in the Infant-Orphan-House, and in the +Boys'-Orphan-House there were ONLY ENOUGH FOR TODAY, and there was no +money in hand to buy more. In this our need T.P.C. sent a load of +coals. How kind of the Lord! A plain proof that not in displeasure, +but only for the trial of our faith we are allowed to be so poor. We +purpose to meet again at four this afternoon. May the Lord graciously +be pleased to send help in the mean time! + +Evening. The Lord has had mercy! A person bought some days since +several articles, which had been given to be sold for the benefit of +the Orphans, and owed 6l. 15s. This morning I asked the Lord to +incline his heart to bring the money, or a part of it, as we were in +such need. Just as I was going to meet for prayer with my +fellow-labourers this afternoon, he came and brought 4l. But our kind +Father showed us still further today, that only for the trial of our +faith He had for a season withheld supplies; for there was given this +evening with Eccles. ix. 10, 5l. There came in also 9s. for articles +which had been put into the hand of a sister, who has taken on her +the service of disposing of articles which are given for sale. +Besides this, there were sent two boxes of new clothes, and some +materials for clothes, from sisters in the Lord, residing in Dublin, +which articles are worth several pounds. Thus the day, which had +begun with prayer, ended in praise. But there is one thing more to be +recorded respecting this day, as precious or more so than what has +been said: I was today informed that the Lord has begun to stir up +several of the boys to care about their souls. + +May 28. The Lord has kindly sent in further supplies. A clergyman +gave 2l.; and 5s. came in for Reports. + +May 29. Today has come in still further 1l. 3s. 2d., and several +trinkets which were sent from Barnstaple. + +May 30. I took 1l. out of the box in my house. + +May 31. When there was again not a penny in hand, the Lord sent in +2l. 2s. + +June 6. This is Saturday. Several pounds were needed, as usual, for +the Orphans; but there was not a penny in hand. In this our great +need F. W., who often has been instrumental in supplying our need, +and who lives many miles from Bristol, sent 5l. There came in 5s. +besides. Thus we are helped to the close of one more week, in which +our faith has been repeatedly tried. In the evening came in further, +by sale of articles, 2l., and a donation of 10s. + +June 7. Lord's day. Today came in 7l. 1s. 3d., to enable us to meet +the necessities of tomorrow. + +June 8. This evening eight German Missionary brethren and sisters, +whom I have been for some time expecting, arrived in Bristol, on +their way to the East Indies. + +June 9. Again, when only 2s. 3d. was in hand for the Orphans, there +came in from a considerable distance 2l. + +June 10 and 11. These two days came in 1l. 0s. 4d., which was enough, +with the little which had been left, to procure what was needed. + +June 12. When there was nothing in hand, several articles of +gentlemen's clothing, all worn, were sent for sale, which, being +disposed of for 1l. 17s., we were helped through this day. + +June 13. Today's need was met by a box of clothes coming from +Worcester, which contained also 3l. 0s. 2d. There was also 11s. taken +out of the box in my house. + +June 15. 2l. 5s. 3d. came in yesterday and today, by which we were +able to meet the necessary demands, and have 5s. left. + +June 16. Some articles were sold for 11s., which had been given for +sale. This, with the remaining 5s., met the necessities of the day. + +June 17. Only 4s. has come in by children's needlework. This is all +we have, to meet the need of today, except 2s. 6d., which I found in +the box in my house, which our poverty led me to open. Evening. The +Lord has had mercy upon us. A sister, to whom some time since some +money was left, and whom the Lord has made willing to lay it all out +in His service, having received a small part of what is coming to +her, brought 5l. 10s. 6d. of it, this afternoon, for the Orphans. +There came in still further this evening 2l. + +For several days past I had been very poor in reference to my own +temporal necessities, as well as in reference to the Orphans. Today +we were especially poor, in both respects; but our kind Father +remembered not merely the need of the dear Orphans, but gave me also +some money for my own personal expenses. The same sister just +referred to, who brought 5l. 10s. 6d. for the Orphans, brought me +also 7l. for myself. + +June 18. Today a new coat and waistcoat were given to me, for which I +had repeatedly asked the Lord, as my clothes are now very old. As +surely as I really need any thing, be it in money, or in any other +way, my kind Father supplies the need. + +June 19. The Lord has poured in still more abundantly today. A +brother gave me 10l. for myself. Thus, after a season of more than +usual poverty, the Lord sends a more than usual supply. How kind a +Master do I serve! + +June 21. Again, when there was not one penny in hand, came in today +6l. 10s. for the Orphans. + +June 22. Tomorrow, the Lord willing, I purpose, with my wife, to +accompany the three German brethren and the five German sisters to +Liverpool who purpose to sail from thence. Under these circumstances +it is desirable to leave at least a little money behind. This desire +of my heart the Lord has granted; for this morning D. C. gave me 5l., +and there came in by sale of articles 10s. 5d. In the evening a +sister, who has left Bristol today, sent me by her mother 5l., having +particularly requested her to let me have the money today, as she +knew that I was going away tomorrow. + +This evening we had an especial Missionary prayer meeting, at which +the brethren and sisters were commended to the Lord. + +June 23. This morning we left for Liverpool, where we safely arrived +in the evening. + +The following extracts give the account of the Lord's goodness in +supplying the necessities of the Orphans, while I was away from +Bristol. + +On June 25, whilst at Liverpool, I received a letter from brother R. +B., master at the Boys'-Orphan-House, dated Bristol, June 24th, in +which he writes thus:--The money which you left behind, with 1s. 6d. +which came in for Reports, supplied the necessities of yesterday and +today; but there is nothing in hand to meet the necessities of +tomorrow. Our hope is in God, assuredly believing that He will, as in +former times, help us in His own time and manner."-- + +Two days afterwards the following letter came. + +"Bristol, June 26, 1840. + +"Dear Brother,--Since I wrote to you we have very sweetly proved the +mercy and truth of our heavenly Father, When my letter left Bristol, +we had not one penny in hand. On the same evening sister gave me a +parcel containing 1l. 1s., the produce of the sale of an article. +This was sufficient for yesterday. But after this we were again +penniless. I went to the meeting in the evening, where brother J. B. +gave me a list of names of persons who had given to him for the +Orphans, to the amount of 1l. 4s. 1d. I afterwards sold one of your +books, one of brother Craik's Renderings, and a Report. I also +remembered that a few days before 2s. 6d. had been given to me which +I had forgotten to use. We therefore had in all 1l. 11s. 7d., which +is sufficient to meet this day's necessities. I have just received a +sovereign for the Orphans, and besides this a box, containing various +articles of clothes which has been sent from Wales, part of which +articles are only fit for sale. Thus we have something for tomorrow, +if needed. + +"Your affectionate brother, + +''R. B,'' + + + +The arrival of the box of clothes, etc., was announced to me in an +affectionate letter from a brother in Wales, who sent them, but whom +I do not know personally. What follows will show how seasonably the +donation came. On June 30th I received another letter from brother +B., dated Bristol, June 29th, 1840, in which he writes "I should have +posted my letter by one o'clock, but delayed until it was too late, +hoping that I might have to speak of the Lord's goodness as well as +of our poverty. Thank God, my hopes have been realized!---Besides the +1l. mentioned in my last letter, in the evening of the 26th 11s. 3d. +came in for needlework, and 5s. was given. On Saturday I sold some of +the clothes which had been sent from Wales for 1l., and 5s. was given +to me for an article which had been sold some time ago. As this was +scarcely sufficient, I opened the boxes, and found 3s. 2d. in them. +The whole, therefore, which was in hand, amounted to 3l. 4s. 5d., +which was enough for Saturday the 27th. This morning, Monday, as +nothing had been given to me since Saturday, there were no means to +provide for the dinner in the Boys'-Orphan-House; but one of the +sisters, having a little money of her own, purchased potatoes and +meat with it. At eleven o'clock we met for prayer. The baker came to +the Infant-Orphan-House, but no bread was taken. A brother left two +quarterns of bread at the Boys'-Orphan-House, as a gift. Soon after I +received 1l. through sister L. G., which, as soon as I received, I +began to write to you. It was a comfort to me, in our poverty, that +you still, united in spirit, prayed with us, although distance +separated us in body. I do not know that I ever felt more powerfully +the kindness of our Heavenly Father, than when I received this last +mentioned 1l. Although we are still poor, and soon shall be again in +need, yet, receiving it just at this time, it was very refreshing." + +The next day I received the following report about the Orphan-Houses +from brother B., dated June 30th.--" According to your request, +tomorrow only is the time for me to write, but as the Lord has dealt +very bountifully with us, I write today, in order that you may be +refreshed by the account thereof. Yesterday afternoon, I received +16s., and this morning I sold some more of the articles sent from +Wales, for 8s. 6d., which meets this day's demands." + +On July 2nd I accompanied the eight German brethren and sisters to +the vessel. Just before they went on board, brother ----, one of the +missionary brethren, gave me 6l. 10s. for the Orphans. He had sold +his plate while at Bristol, considering that as a servant of Jesus +Christ, and as one who desired to preach Jesus to the poor Hindoos, +he needed it not, This money was the produce of it, except about 2l., +which he had spent in purchasing a few books. In giving it to me +said, "The money which we have in the common stock, (being altogether +20l. for the eight) is enough for us. For some months, while we are +on board, we need no money at all, whilst you may lay it out; and +when we need more, the Lord will again supply our need. The other +brethren and sisters have no money of their own, and I desire +likewise to have none, The Lord has laid the Orphans particularly on +my heart, and therefore you must not refuse to accept it."--This +brother little knew how on that very day I had been repeatedly asking +the Lord for means. Truly this was one of the most remarkable ways of +obtaining money, as it came from a poor German missionary, who, in +dependence upon the Lord for his temporal supplies, went to the East +Indies. I sent off at once 5l. of this money to Bristol. The next +day, July 3, I received at Liverpool the following letter from +brother B., dated Bristol, July 2nd.--" Since I last wrote, we have +still found that the Lord is faithful to His word. May we never be +unfaithful towards Him! On Tuesday evening, June 30th, sister C. +brought 11s. 6d. for some articles she sold, and I had received 1s. +6d. for Reports. This, with 8s. that had been put into the boxes, met +the absolute necessities of yesterday, Wednesday. As nothing has been +given since Tuesday, we are, today, Thursday, very needy. I sold the +books I mentioned as being sent, with some others which one of the +sisters in the Orphan-Houses gave of her own, for 7s., which bought +that which was needful for dinner; but there is no money to take in +bread nor milk for one of the houses. We met for prayer. Our hope is +in God, trusting that He who has so often helped us in poverty, will +still do so. If I write any more I shall be too late to post this +letter." + +[On my return to Bristol I found, which is not mentioned in the next +letter, that the milk was purchased with the money of one of the +sisters in the Orphan-Houses.] + +On July 4th I received the following letter from Bristol, dated July +3rd. + +"My dear Brother,--The last account I sent you left us in the greatest +poverty. We had sufficient, it is true, for the time then present; +but there was no money to take in bread with. In the afternoon there +was an old riding habit sent for the Orphans, which I sold this +morning for 7s. I also sold a few books for 5s., two old silver +thimbles and a ring for 1s. 6d.; besides this, 1s. 6d. was sent for +Reports; making in all 15s. This purchased dinner for the three +houses. At twelve o'clock we met for prayer. We were indeed in great +need. There was no money either for bread or milk. The coals in all +the three houses were used, and in every other respect the stores +were in a low state. We had really wanted nothing, but there was +scarcely any thing left. Well, while we were in prayer to God, your +letter came. One of the sisters opened the door and received it, and +after prayer it was given to me. You will be able to conceive the +greatness of our joy, on opening it, and finding it to contain 5l. I +cannot express how much I felt. During the trial I had been much +comforted by the Lord's sending a little token of his love every day. +It just proved that He was mindful of us in our poverty, and that +when His time was come, He would send us an abundance. I think we all +felt your absence a little, although not cast down on that account. +Money is very precious to those who, like us, so evidently see the +HAND and HEART of our Heavenly Father in bestowing it, The sisters +send their love to you. + +"Your affectionate brother, + +"R. B." + + + +On July 6th I received the following account from Bristol, dated July +5th. "You are, I am sure, often praying for us, and therefore see, in +the help we receive, God's gracious answers to your prayers, and +therefore you will be refreshed by hearing the account of how matters +are with us. On Saturday there was again a little money needed in the +Girls'-Orphan-House, for butter and such little articles; but I had +none in hand, wherewith to supply this need, until nearly tea time, +when 5s. was given to me. In the evening of the same day, at ten +o'clock, 10s. was sent through brother J. S. You will see that we are +still cast simply on God for the future, without anything to depend +on but Himself; and on whom, or on what should children depend, but +on their most kind Father." + +On July 8th, whilst still detained in the Lord's service at +Liverpool, I received from a brother 10l. for the Orphans, which I +sent off at once. On the same day, after I had sent off the money, I +received the following letter from Bristol, dated July 7. + +"The Lord is still pleased to keep us very low. Only 4s. 2d. in money +has come in since last I wrote to you. The 10s. I told you of, and +this 4s. 2d., I divided among the sisters. But as this was far from +being sufficient, and knowing that you had received 6l. 10s. and only +sent 5l., I took out of the other funds 1l. 6s. 6d., being all that I +could spare, and divided it also. I would not have done so, had it +not been needful, and had it not appeared to me that we were not +going out of the path of obedience in doing this. There was a sack of +flour sent this morning. We are still, we may say, in need, as even +the money, which I have divided, was not enough to purchase every +thing desirable to have." + +On July 11th, whilst at Worcester, I received the following letter, +dated Bristol, July 9. + +"After writing to you the last time, I got no more money on that day, +except 1s. The next day, Wednesday, I received 2s. 6d., and took 2s. +out of the box in the Boys'-Orphan-House. Also a sister purchased a +Bible, and out of that money I took 3s. 6d. to make up the 30s., to +which I alluded in my last letter. This carried us through the day. +In the evening of the same day I received 11s. 3d. and 2s., which +purchased meat for dinner; and the potatoes in the boys' garden, +being now fit for use, we had for dinner. After the dinner was +provided we received the 10l. from you, which enabled the sisters +again to replenish their stock. Out of the 10l. I kept the 30s., in +case I might need it on Saturday for the salaries of the masters and +governesses of the Day Schools. We felt the poverty a little more, I +think, on account of your absence. I knew the Lord would help, but +still I felt tried in some measure. The Lord, by His grace, reproves +our waywardness towards Him. + +When this letter arrived, there was sent to me, at the same time, +from Bristol, 5l. for the Orphans, which I sent off at once. On July +17th I returned to Bristol. + +I add a few more words respecting my stay at Liverpool. + +--About October 1837 I sent some Bibles and 46 copies of my Narrative +to a brother in Upper Canada, who, in dependence upon the Lord for +temporal supplies, is labouring as a missionary in that country. +About eighteen months afterwards I heard, that this box had not +arrived. I then wrote to the shipbroker at Liverpool, (who as agent +had to send it to America, and to whom I had paid his commission and +the freight), to make inquiry about the box; but I received no +answer. About a month afterwards my letter was returned to me, +through the Dead-Letter Office, and it was stated on the outside that +the individual had left Liverpool, and no one knew where he was gone. +Putting all these things together, I had now full reason to think +that the broker had, never sent off the box. My comfort, however, +was, that though this poor sinner had acted thus, yet the Lord, in +His own place and way, would use the Bibles and my Narratives. Now, +almost immediately after my arrival in Liverpool, a brother told me, +that several persons wished to hear me preach who had read my +Narrative; and that he knew a considerable number had been bought by +a brother, a bookseller, from pawnbrokers, and sold again; and that +some also had been ordered from London when there were no more to be +had otherwise. It was thus evident that the shipbroker pawned these +Narratives before he absconded; but the Lord used them as I had +hoped.--I preached ten times in English and once in German whilst at +Liverpool, and I know that several persons were brought to hear me, +through having read my Narrative.--The German brethren preached twice +in German, there being several German vessels in the port, and a +number of German sugar refiners living at Liverpool. Liverpool seems +to me especially a place where a brother, who is familiar with French +and German, may find an abundance of work among the German and French +sailors, in the way of preaching to them, and in the way of +distributing French and German Bibles and Tracts.--One of the German +missionary brethren found out a brother in the Lord, a native of the +same town in Prussia, from whence he himself comes, who repeatedly +met with us. This dear sailor was the only believer in the vessel in +which he was, and has had to suffer much for the Lord's sake.--When +the German brethren and sisters were going on board, I engaged a fly +for the purpose of taking all their small luggage. When the man put +the luggage into the fly, I was struck by its having a hind boot, +which I had never seen before in any fly, which he opened, and into +which he put several carpet bags. There were seventeen packages +altogether. When we arrived at the vessel it was just on the point of +going into the river, with several other vessels, and there were +crowds of people standing at the docks. The flyman took out the +luggage and was on the point of leaving, when I asked him whether he +had taken out all the luggage, which I had not been able to count, +because of the pressure of people, and the rapidity with which the +packages were taken to the vessel. His reply was, Yes. But all at +once, by the good hand of God, I remembered the hind boot, and I +asked him to open it. The man, somewhat confused, opened it, and in +it were five or six carpet bags. This thing showed me afresh our +entire dependence upon the Lord, step by step. I was alone. The crowd +was great. The vessel was on the point of sailing: and all without my +fault or the fault of any one; but it was so through unforseen +circumstances. One minute later, and the bags, in all human +probability, would have been lost. For when the brethren had missed +their luggage, it would have been too late; for though I had marked +the number of the fly when I engaged it, yet that would have profited +nothing, when once the brethren were at sea. But the hand of God was +for good upon these His children, whose stock of linen was only such +as they would need. Such a circumstance should teach one to make the +very smallest affairs a subject of prayer; for instance, That all the +luggage might be safely taken out of a fly. + +On July 10th my wife and I left Liverpool, where we had experienced +much kindness, for Worcester, where we stayed a few days, and had +again much love shown to us by the saints there. + +July 25. Since July 11th the Lord has kindly sent in the supplies for +the Orphans, so that we have had always something coming in, before +the last which was in hand was spent. Now, today, having paid out +this morning 8l. 5s., again nothing was left in hand, when in the +afternoon 3l. came in by sale of articles. + +July 26. Lord's-day. As I had no opportunity today of preaching in +our chapels (there being two brethren ministering among us who are +strangers in Bristol), I have preached twice this evening in the open +air. Precious as this work is, yet I am sure it is not that to which +I am called for a constancy, as I have no strength of body for it. +But I have seen afresh this evening how greatly it is needed. The +second time I preached, I took my stand in a court, filled with poor +people, almost every one of whom was dirty, though it was the Lord's +day evening. A woman readily lent me a chair on which I stood, and +could thus be heard by the people in the houses behind and before me, +and on my right and left hand. Judging from their dirty appearance, I +should not suppose any of these poor people had been any where, to +hear the Gospel preached throughout the day. How plenteous is the +harvest, and how few are the labourers! Lord of the harvest, send +Thou, in compassion to poor sinners, more labourers into the harvest! +--How well a brother who has some gift, and a measure of strength of +lungs, might employ a part of the Lord's days, or of other days, +either by reading the Scriptures from house to house to such persons, +and making some remarks on them; or by standing up in a court and +reading the Scriptures aloud and speaking on them. It is very rarely +that one meets with decided opposition on these occasions; at least I +have generally in such cases found far more readiness to listen, than +decidedly to oppose. + +Aug. 1. A few days since a brother was staying with me, on his way to +his father, whom he had not seen for above two years, and who was +greatly opposed to him, on account of the decided steps which his son +had taken for the Lord. Before this brother left, that precious +promise of our Lord was brought to my mind: "If two of you shall +agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be +done for them of my Father which is in heaven." Matt. xviii. 19. +Accordingly, I went to the brother's room, and having agreed to pray +about a kind reception from his father, and the conversion of both +parents, we prayed together.--Today this brother returned. The Lord +has answered already one part of the prayer. The brother was most +kindly received, contrary to all natural expectation. May the Lord +now help us both to look for an answer to the other part of our +prayer! There is nothing too hard for the Lord! + +Since the publication of the third edition, the father of this +brother died. He lived above ten years after Aug. 1, 1840, until he +was above 86 years of age; and as he continued a life of much sin and +opposition to the truth, the prospect with reference to his +conversion became darker and darker. But at last the Lord answered +prayer. This aged sinner was entirely changed, simply rested on the +Lord Jesus for the salvation of his soul, and became as much attached +to his believing son, as before he had been opposed to him; and +wished to have him about him as much as possible, that he might read +the Holy Scriptures to him and pray with him. Let this instance +encourage believers, who have unbelieving parents, to continue in +prayer for them. + +Since the publication of the fourth edition, the mother also died. +About sixteen years had elapsed, after her son and I had thus prayed +together, before, in her case, the answer was granted; yet she, too, +at last, in very advanced years, was brought to trust in the Lord +Jesus alone for the salvation of her soul.--I distinctly remember, +with what full assurance, that the Lord would answer our united +supplication, I went to the room of this brother, to propose prayer, +resting upon the promise in Matt. xviii. 19, though the case appeared +to be most hopeless. + +Aug. 6. Yesterday I was led, by the sense of our necessity, and the +knowledge of the Father's heart, like Elijah, to go again and again +to Him with my request for help, as there was nothing in hand for the +Orphans to supply the necessities of today. Last evening, after the +meeting, a brother from Oxford gave me a sovereign for the Orphans; +by two other individuals was sent half-a-crown; and by the sale of an +article, which had been given many weeks since, but was only disposed +of today, came in 5s.: thus, in all, the Lord sent again 1l. 7s. 6d. +This morning I heard that 10s. was given yesterday to brother B., so +that we were able to meet the demands of today, which are 1l. 15s. + +Aug. 7. As there was only 2s. 6d. in hand, I asked the Lord +repeatedly yesterday to send us what was needed for today. When I +came home last evening from the meeting, 5l. was given to me, which +Q. Q. had brought while I was away, to be used as I thought well. +This I took for the Orphans, which will supply our need for today and +tomorrow. + +Aug. 8. Saturday. This evening I was meditating on the 4th Psalm. The +words in verse 3: "But know that the Lord hath set apart him that is +godly for Himself; the Lord will hear when I call upon Him," I was +enabled to apply to myself, and they led me to prayer for spiritual +blessings. Whilst in prayer, the need of the Orphans (there being now +again not one penny in hand), was also brought to my mind, and I +asked the Lord respecting this likewise. ABOUT FIVE MINUTES +AFTERWARDS I was informed that a sister wished to see me. She brought +1l. 10s. for the Orphans. Thus the Lord has already kindly sent a +little to begin the week with. There was also still further given +today, 1s. 11d.; and 5s. 1d. was taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses. + +Aug. 10. Monday. The 1l. 17s. which came in on Saturday evening for +the Orphans, was not enough for the necessities of today, as 2l. l5s. +was required. About noon, the Lord gave through a brother in Bath, +who has a relative in one of the Orphan-Houses, 1l. 10s. more, so +that we had enough, and a few shillings left. This evening came in +4s. besides, also 15s. 6d. by sale of articles. + +Aug. 11. The money which was in hand, with 3s. which was given by one +of the labourers, as there was not enough otherwise, helped us +through this day. + +Aug. 12. One of the labourers gave today 10s. of his own, as nothing +had come in. Yet this would not have been sufficient, had there not +been sold two pairs of stockings, which had been knitted by the boys, +for 4s. 1d., and had not 5s. been found in one of the boxes. + +Aug. 13. Yesterday there was given a collection of shells, which was +sold today, and supplied the necessities of this day, with an +addition of 10s. which a brother gave last evening, and 4s. which was +taken out of the box in the Infant-Orphan-House. + +Aug. 14. There was nothing at all in hand. I opened the box in my +house, and found 1s. 4d. in it, A labourer gave 4s. of his own. There +was found 1s, 6d. in the boxes in the Orphan-Houses, and 5s. came in +by the sale of a few articles which had been given for that purpose. +By this 11s. 10d, we were able to meet the absolute need, but were +able to take in only a small quantity of bread. + +Aug. 15. There was today the greatest poverty in all the three +houses; all the stores were very low, as the income throughout the +week had been so small. In addition to this it was Saturday, when the +wants are nearly double in comparison with other days. At least 3l. +was needed to help us comfortably through the day; but there was +nothing towards this in hand. My only hope was in God. + +The very necessity led me to expect help for this day; for if none +had come, the Lord's name would have been dishonoured. Between twelve +and one two sisters in the Lord called on me, and the one gave me 2l. +and the other 7s. 6d. for the Orphans. With this I went to the +Boys'-Orphan-House about one o'clock, where I found the children at +dinner. Brother B. put the following note into my hand, which he was +just going to send off: + +"Dear Brother,--With potatoes from the children's garden, and with +apples from the tree in the play-ground (which apples were used for +apple dumplings), and 4s. 6d. the price of some articles given by one +of the labourers, we have a dinner. There is much needed. But the +Lord has provided and will provide." + +There came in still further this day by sale of Reports, 1s., by the +box in the Girls'-Orphan-House, 1s., by children's needlework, 6s. +6d., by a donation of one of the sisters in the Orphan-Houses, 6s. +Thus we had this day 3l. 6s. 6d. to meet all necessities, and are +brought to the close of another week. + +Aug. 16. Lord's-day. There came in still further last evening, 3s. by +sale of some articles, and today 2s. was given, and 5l.; so that the +Lord in His love and faithfulness has given us what we are likely to +need tomorrow and the day after. + +Aug. 17. There has come in still further 2l. + +Aug. 18. This morning a brother who passed through Bristol gave 1l., +saying that it had been especially laid on his heart to do so. Thus +the Lord has provided a little towards tomorrow. Besides this came in +today 1s. 9d. + +Aug. 19. By the sale of three pairs of stockings came in 5s. 6d., and +from Liverpool was sent 12s. 6d.: this, with what was in hand, was +enough for today, and left a little over. + +Aug. 20. Today there was not enough money in hand to meet all the +demands; but it being known that yesterday several persons had put +money into the boxes in the Orphan-Houses, they were opened, and +found to contain 1l. 4s. 6d., which was more than sufficient. + +I would call upon the believing reader to admire the love and wisdom +and power of God in ordering it so that persons should come to the +Orphan-Houses just at the time when there is temporal pressure, and +should be influenced to put money into the boxes. These little sums +have been often the means of helping us in our greatest need. The +especial providence of God, as in every other respect, so in this +particular point also, is to be seen respecting this Institution, in +that so much is anonymously put into the boxes; for there has been no +less than 45l. 18s. 9 3/4d, put in during the last two years, from +Dec. 10, 1838, to Dec. 10, 1840. + +Aug. 22. Saturday. Yesterday there was only 13s. 6d. in hand, which +was enough to meet the necessities of the day, but not sufficient to +enable us to take in the usual quantity of bread. This morning we +were in much need, not only because there were no means for procuring +dinner in the Boys' and Girls'-Orphan-Houses, but also because, this +being Saturday, we had to procure provisions for two days. When +brother B. went to the Infant-Orphan-House, to make inquiry about the +demands for today, he was informed that money had been put into the +box there, which was found to be 12s. There came in also in the +morning 10s, besides. This 1l. 2s. was more than sufficient to +purchase all that was needed for dinner. Between twelve and one +o'clock there arrived a parcel from Clapham, which contained several +donations for the Orphans, amounting to 2l. l5s., besides a pair of +sheets and pillow cases, 4 frocks, 4 handkerchiefs, 4 caps, 1 stuff +petticoat, 2 chemises, 6 bags, 1 little shirt, (all new), and several +yards of prints and calico. In the evening came a box from Worcester, +which contained the following articles for sale: a valuable veil, 2 +silver ladles, a silver fork, 2 pairs of new plated candlesticks, a +fan, and 2 Italian books. There came also from the neighbourhood of +Wolverhampton, 2s. 6d. and seven books. Thus the Lord helped us +through this day also, at the commencement of which we were so very +poor, and needed several pounds. + +Aug. 23. Lord's-day. As we have often found it to be the case, so it +is again now. After the Lord has tried our faith, He, in the love of +His heart, gives us an abundance, to show that not in anger, but for +the glory of His name, and for the trial of our faith He has allowed +us to be poor. This morning I received from an aged and afflicted +servant, 3l.; and a little afterwards 8l. from Q. Q. From another +servant 5s.; also 2s. was put anonymously into the box at Bethesda, +besides the 1l. 10s. for rent. Thus the Lord has kindly given today +12l. 17s. + +Aug. 29. Saturday. Since last Monday had come in only 2l. by the +profits of the sale of ladies' baskets, 1l. l4s. 10d. by sale of +articles, 3s. as two donations, and 6d. by Reports. Thus it happened +that when this day began, though a Saturday, we had only 7s. in hand. +In the course of the morning came in 11s. 9d., and towards the +evening 8s. 6d. This day we have been as poor in regard to our +stores, as at any time. During the whole of this day, though +Saturday, we had only 1l. 7s. 3d, On this account we had to buy a +smaller quantity of bread than usual, etc.; nevertheless the children +have even this day lacked nothing, and there is a sufficient quantity +of wholesome food till breakfast on Monday morning. + +For many weeks past very little has come in for the other funds. The +chief supply has been by the sale of Bibles. Last Saturday I was not +able to pay the whole of the weekly salaries of the teachers in the +Day Schools, which, however, does not make me a debtor to them, as it +is an understood thing, that they have not to look to me for payment, +but to the Lord. Today again only 2s. was in hand, whilst several +pounds were needed to pay the salaries. It appeared now plainly to be +the will of the Lord that, as all the labourers in the Orphan-Houses +know about the state of the funds, so the brethren and sisters who +labour in the Day Schools should share the trial of faith and the joy +of faith with us. Accordingly we all met, and after I had laid on +their hearts, the importance of keeping to themselves, for the Lord's +sake, the state of the funds, we prayed together. + +Aug. 30. Lord's day. Today the Lord has again bountifully opened His +hand for the Orphans. There came in with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, 5l.; +from a sister, a servant, 10s.; and for rent 1l. 10s. Besides this, +was anonymously put into the box at Bethesda, 10s. 3d. and 2s. 6d. + +Sept. 1. Though there was a good supply given to the matrons +yesterday, yet, as the stock of provisions had been so low on +Saturday, the money was all spent by last evening; and had the Lord +not kindly sent in yesterday 14s., and today 1l. 10s., we should have +been again in need. + +Sept. 4. The day before yesterday, Sept. 2, came a box from Leeds, +from sisters in the Lord whom we have never seen, and of whom until +now we have never heard, but on whose hearts the Lord has laid His +work in our hands. The box contained a variety of articles, to be +sold for the benefit of the Orphans. No money has come in the last +two days, except 1s. which was given, and 5s. for things sold. On +this account the boxes in the Orphan-Houses were opened, but only 1s. +7 1/2d. was found in them. To supply what was needed today, an +article which came in the box from Leeds was sold for 5s. and thus we +were helped through the day. The sisters who sent the box from Leeds +wrote to us a most affectionate letter, in which they announced this +and another box which is to follow, stating how much the Lord had +laid the work in our hand on their hearts. They may have little +thought, when they sent off the box, that so soon the produce of one +of the articles sent by them would supply our need. + +Sept. 5. Saturday. Because there had come in so little during the +last days, at least 3l. was requisite to supply the need of today. +There was, however, not one penny in hand when the day commenced. +Last evening the labourers in the Orphan-Houses, together with the +teachers of the Day Schools, met for prayer. This morning one of the +teachers, who had a little money of his own, brought 1l. 5s. 6d. +Thus, as we had hoped, we were enabled to provide for the dinner. In +the afternoon all of us met again for prayer. Another teacher of the +Day Schools gave 2s, 6d, and 1s. came in besides. But all this was +not enough. There was no dinner provided for tomorrow, nor was there +any money to take in milk tomorrow, and besides this a number of +other little things were to be purchased, that there might be no real +want of anything. Now observe how our kind father helped us! Between +seven and eight this evening a sister, whose heart the Lord has made +willing to take on her the service of disposing of the articles which +are sent for sale, brought 2l. 10s. 6d. for some of the things which +came a fortnight ago from Worcester, and last Wednesday from Leeds. +The sister stated, that though she did not feel at all well, she had +come because she had it so laid on her heart, that she could not stay +away. Our Father knew our need, and therefore, though so late, He +sent this help. Thus we were richly provided with all we needed this +Saturday. + +Sept. 6. The Lord has kindly sent in today for the Orphans 4l. 5s. +6d. for the need of tomorrow. One pound of this money was given by a +servant, who has again and again given of late, and who has thus +again and again been the means of supplying our need, when there was +either nothing at all, or not sufficient in hand. When she gave me +the money to-night, she told me that of late she had had the Orphans +particularly laid on her heart. 1l. 3s. was the produce of an +orphan-box, which a sister was led so seasonably to send just now. + +Sept. 7. This morning a brother from Barnstaple, who came on Saturday +evening (that evening when we were so greatly tried, but so +graciously delivered), gave me 1l. 0s. 3d., which the love of some +saints at Barnstaple had sent for the Orphans, besides 5s. of his +own. We have thus enough for today and tomorrow. There came in still +further today, 6s. 6d. + +Sept. 8. How kindly has the Lord so ordered it that for some time +past the income for the school-fund should have been so little, in +order that thus we might be constrained to let the labourers in the +Day Schools share our joys and our trials of faith, which had been +before kept from them! But as above two years ago the Lord ordered it +so that it became needful to communicate to the labourers in the +Orphan-Houses the state of the funds, and made it a blessing to them, +so that I am now able to leave Bristol, and yet the work goes on, so, +I doubt not, the brethren and sisters who are teachers in the Day +Schools will be greatly blessed by being thus partakers of our +precious secret respecting the state of the funds. Our prayer +meetings have already been a blessing to us, and united us more than +ever in the work. We have them now every morning at seven, and we +shall continue them, the Lord helping us, till we see His hand +stretched forth, not merely in giving us means for the teachers, but +also for other purposes; for we need a stove in one of the school +rooms, a fresh supply of several kinds of Bibles and New Testaments, +and it is desirable to have means to help Missionary brethren who +labour in dependence upon the Lord for the supply of their temporal +necessities. + +Sept. 9. We are now meeting every morning at seven for prayer. With +5s. which was sent yesterday from the Isle of Wight for the Orphans, +we have commenced the day; but I believe that the Lord will help us +through this day also. + +Evening. About twelve this morning a brother, a stranger, who is +staying at Ashton, near Bristol, came with some of his family to the +Orphan-Houses. While brother B. was for a few moments out of the room +to fetch a key, the visiting brother took the opportunity of secretly +putting something into the box at the Boys'-Orphan-House. Brother B., +however, perceived it before he could get away from the box, and, the +brother being gone, our great need brought it out, when it was found +to be 5l. Thus the Lord kindly has provided for the need of today and +tomorrow. When this money was given we were exceedingly poor. For not +only would there have been no means to take in the usual quantity of +bread in one of the houses, but there was no money to take in milk in +the afternoon in any of the houses. The Lord knew our need, and +therefore just now sent this brother. He gave also 2s, for Reports. + +Sept. 10. When now the 5l. of yesterday was again spent, the Lord has +kindly sent another 5l. There came in still further 6s. 10d. + +Yesterday came in it. 7s., and today 1l. 15s. 10d. for the other +funds. Thus the Lord, in answer to our petitions at the morning +prayer meetings, has sent in a little for these funds also. + +Sept. 11. The Lord has sent in still further and more richly for the +Orphans. This morning 1l. was given to me which had been sent from +Trowbridge, and this afternoon a brother who came from Scotland gave +me 10l., and brought the following trinkets which were sent by a lady +from Scotland:--2 clasps, a ring, 2 pairs of ear-rings, a slide, a +pin, a cross, and 2 bracelets, all of gold. In the afternoon came in +3l. by sale of articles. + +Sept. 12. The Lord has sent in still more. This morning was sent 10l. +through a banker in London, by the order of a sister at Worcester; +and 10s. was put into the box at my house. This has been a week of +peculiar mercies, as above 40l. has been sent in, besides several +articles. We have continued to meet for prayer every morning, from +seven to eight. + +Sept. 13. Today came in 3l. 8s. 4d.,of which 1l. 10s. 6d. was for some +of the articles sent from Leeds. + +Sept. 16. Though during the last week above 40l. came in, yet, +because the usual expenses for housekeeping were about 15l., and +because most of the sisters who labour in the Orphan-Houses had not +had for a long time any money for their own personal necessities, we +were the day before yesterday again so poor, that only a few +shillings were left. The Lord, knowing this, sent in a little money, +and, by a sister from the Isle of Wight, 7 rings, 2 brooches, 2 pins, +1 pair of ear-rings, 2 pairs of studs, all of gold, 2 chemises, and 2 +babies' shirts. Today arrived from Leeds, from two sisters in the +Lord before referred to, a second box, the first having come about a +fortnight ago. This second box contained the following articles:--2 +silver dessert spoons, a pair of silver sugar tongs, a silver tea +caddy spoon, 6 plated forks, 4 knife resters, a cream spoon, 6 +Britannia metal tea spoons, a silver watch, a metal watch, a small +telescope, 2 cloak fastenings, 11 pencils, a pen case with pieces of +sealing wax, 2 pairs of scissors, 6 chimney ornaments, a boa ring, a +chess board, 3 purses with 2l. 1s. 4d., 2 silver pocket knives, a +silver pencil case, a ditto of brass, a bodkin case, a gold pin, a +silver vinaigrette, 125 needles, 1 memorandum case, 5 paper baskets, +18 books, 100 copies of a small English Grammar (unbound), 75 +pamphlets, 37 table mats, 120 little tracts, 5 pairs of stockings, 2 +pairs of socks, a Thibet shawl, 6 coloured frocks, 4 caps, 9 collars, +8 neckerchiefs, 3 muslin aprons, 5 holland aprons, 4 muslin frocks, 6 +babies' ditto, 2 white gowns, 2 remnants of print, 5 habit shirts, a +bonnet, a merino apron, a glass trumpet, a taper candlestick, several +small pieces of riband and gauze, 4 yards of silk fringe, 7 cases of +different kinds of cards, a crape scarf, some lining calico, 13 +little boxes, a straw basket, and about 50 other various little +articles. It is difficult to describe the peculiar pleasure which I +had in unpacking the box, and in finding that all these articles were +for the Lord's work.--There came in still further this evening 8s. + +Besides other small donations since the 10th, there came into day 5l. +for the other funds, as the answer to oft-repeated prayer; also, from +Liverpool, 1l. l4s. 8d. Thus the Lord encourages our hearts in this +part of the work likewise. + +Sept. 17. The need of today for the Orphans was supplied by the +little which had come in yesterday, and by the 2l. 1s. 4d. which came +in the second box from Leeds. These two boxes from Leeds have been +sent most seasonably by the Lord, and thus truly the sisters who sent +them have been led by Him to do so, according to what they wrote in a +letter, which announced the arrival of the first box; "We feel deeply +interested in your concerns, and our anxiety to serve you has +increased by every new discovery of the kindness and goodness of God, +in providing for your wants. Indeed, we cannot but believe that the +Lord has put it into our hearts to help you, and we trust you will +honour us, His unworthy servants, by believing that our gift is +really His." There came in today 2l. 16s. by the sale of some of the +articles sent in the first box from Leeds, and by the sale of some +other articles. Thus our need for tomorrow is supplied. + +Sept. 18. Today the Lord has sent again 17s. 5d. by sale of some of +the articles sent from Leeds, and 2l. 10s. from Leicestershire, and +also 4s. for children's needlework. Thus we had enough for tomorrow, +being Saturday. + +Sept. 21. Monday. By what was in hand for the Orphans, and by what +had come in yesterday, the need of today is more than supplied, as +there is enough for tomorrow also. + +Today a brother from the neighbourhood of London gave me 10l., to be +laid out as it might be most needed. we have been praying many days +for the School-Bible--and Missionary Funds, I took it all for them. +This brother knew nothing about our work, when he came three days +since to Bristol. Thus the Lord, to show His continued care over us, +raises up new helpers. They that trust in the Lord shall never be +confounded! Some who helped for a while may fall asleep in Jesus; +others may grow cold in the service of the Lord; others may be as +desirous as ever to help, but have no longer the means; others may +have both a willing heart to help, and have also the means, but may +see it the Lord's will to lay them out in another way;--and thus, from +one cause or another, were we to lean upon man, we should surely be +confounded; but, in leaning upon the living God alone, We are BEYOND +disappointment, and BEYOND being forsaken because of death, or want +of means, or want of love, or because of the claims of other work. +How precious to have learned in any measure to stand with God alone +in the world, and yet to be happy, and to know that surely no good +thing shall be withheld from us whilst we walk uprightly! + +Sept. 23. This morning there was again only 10s. in hand for the +Orphans. As this was not enough for the day, I opened the box in my +house, in which I found 8s. 6d. The boxes in the Orphan-Houses were +also opened, which contained 7s. 6 1/2d. There came in also by the +sale of a pair of stockings, 1s. 6d. This 1l., 7s. 6 1/2d. was +enough, and even 3s. more than was absolutely needed. The Lord gave +today another proof that He is still mindful of us, for a brother +sent half a ton of coals to each of the three houses. + +Sept. 24. Yesterday our prayer, in our meeting at twelve o'clock, was +especially for the supply of today. I was fully assured that the Lord +would send help, as now all our stores were again exhausted. +Accordingly, last evening a sister, into whose hands some of the +articles, which came in the second box from Leeds, had been put for +sale, gave me 1l. 3s. 7d., being the payment for some of them. There +came in a donation of 2s. besides. This 1l. 5s. 7d. served for this +day. The Lord be praised who has helped us thus! + +Sept. 25. It is now half-past eleven. Nothing has come in as yet. How +the Lord will help us through the day is not my care; for sure I am +He will help. I am just going to meet with my fellow-labourers for +prayer. Perhaps the Lord will again, at the time of the meeting, fill +our mouths with praise, as He has done so many times. My soul waits +on Him for deliverance! How truly precious to have such a Father as +we have! + +Sept. 26. When I went yesterday to the meeting for prayer, I found +that some articles, which had come from Leeds, had been sold for 10s. +9d., and that 2s. 6d. had been taken out of the box in the +Girls'-Orphan-Ho use. To this one of the labourers added 10s. of his +own. This 1l. 3s. 3d. supplied all we needed yesterday; but there was +now again nothing in hand to meet this day's demands, which I knew +would be great, on account of its being Saturday. The Lord, however, +remembered our Saturday's necessities, and therefore sent in +abundantly, so that we had even more than we needed for today, though +we required no less than 5l. The way in which He kindly helped us, +was this: first, 3l. came in for articles which had been sent from +Leeds; afterwards a little boy and girl brought two little Savings' +Banks, filled with their little presents, amounting altogether to +15s l 1/4d. In the evening came in still further 4l. for articles +which had been sold, most of which had likewise been sent from Leeds. +Thus the Lord sent in altogether 8l. l8s. l 1/4d. in the course of +the day, whilst it commenced without there being a penny in hand. + +Sept. 27. Today the Lord has sent in still further 2l. 5s. 8d., of +which 15s. 8d. was for articles sent from Leeds, and 1l. with +Ecclesiastes ix. 10. + +Sept. 29. Yesterday we were again penniless, after the necessities of +the three houses had been supplied. Almost immediately afterwards +came in 1l. l2s. 2d., sufficient to supply the need of today. + +Sept. 30. Today there is nothing in hand. It is now a quarter past +eleven, but nothing yet has come in. Nevertheless the Lord will +surely help us this day also! About five minutes after I had written +the above, I was informed by a note from brother B., that 2l. 10s. +6d. had come in in small donations. + +Oct. 1. It is now again eleven o'clock, and the Lord has not as yet +been pleased to send in any thing for the necessities of this day. +Let me see now how the Lord will again help us in the love of His +heart; for He will surely help, though I know not how.--Evening. When +I went to the prayer meeting, I found that only 1s. had come in, but +at the same time I was informed that the money, which had been +divided yesterday among the matrons, was enough for today also. + +Oct. 2. Nothing came in yesterday, nor this morning. In addition to +this, I was so engaged, that in the afternoon I had not even time to +make inquiry how the Lord had helped. Thus it is often that I can do +nothing but quietly go on with my engagements, casting all care upon +the Lord. When I came home this evening, the first thing that met my +eyes was the following letter from a distance of many miles: + +"Beloved Brother,--Five pounds are enclosed as from the Lord, as I +believe you stand in need of it for the use of the Orphans. Yours +affectionately, F. W. + +Truly, the Lord, to whom we had spoken yesterday, had spoken for us, +and told this brother that we were in need of money. After having +read this letter, my eyes met two others. In the one I was informed +by a brother, that he had sold two pairs of fire screens for 8s., and +had sent the money. These screens had been for many months in his +hands for sale, and now to-day, in this our poverty, a lady came to +the shop and bought them. The other letter was from brother B., +master of the boys in the Boys'-Orphan-House, which I give here: + +"I opened the boxes and found 4s. 1 1/2d. in them. This was far from +being sufficient. About four o'clock three persons came to the +Orphan-Houses, and put into the box at the Boys'-Orphan-House 7s., +into the box at the Infant-Orphan-House 6s., and into the box at the +Girls'-Orphan-House 7s. Thus I have had in all to divide 1l. 4s. 1 +1/2d., which meets the necessities of the day." + +Oct. 3. It was exceedingly kind of the Lord to send in so much +yesterday; for the necessities of today, being Saturday, required it +all. And now, when there was again nothing in hand, there arrived +this evening a large box, sent by a sister at Stafford, whom I never +saw, which contained 1l. 5s., and the following articles: 11 gold +rings, a silver ring washed, a locket, a gold brooch, 3 single +ear-rings, a watch hook, a silver watch-guard, 2 silver-mounted eye +glasses, 3 vinaigrettes, 2 purses, a silver buckle, 2 old silver +coins, 2 silver pencil cases, 3 pairs of bracelets, 3 necklaces, 2 +waist buckles, a bracelet snap, a cloak fastening, a necklace snap, a +yard measure, a mourning brooch, 7 pincushions, a snuff box, a small +looking glass, 2 china boxes, a china inkstand, 5 china cups and +saucers, a china basket, 2 china jugs, a scent bottle, a boa ring, 20 +shells, a boy's cap, a pair of snuffers and stand, a little basket, a +pair of screen handles, 3 ornamental pens, 5 artificial flowers, 5 +glass plates, 5 counter plates, 3 pairs of card racks, a comb, a pair +of watch pockets, 12 table mats, 8 paintings, 4 drawings, 2 fans, a +pair of garters, 3 pairs of gloves, 3 pairs of silk stockings, 3 +veils, a gauze scarf, 6 ladies' bags, 5 silk bands, 2 floss silk +scarfs, a gauze handkerchief, 2 silk scarfs, a crape shawl, a silk +shawl, 2 muslin capes, 30 yards of worn cotton lace, 8 yards of +muslin work, 9 yards of print, a pinafore, a frock, a sampler, a pair +of socks, a pair of ear-rings, and 17 ladies' dresses.--One thing is +particularly to be noticed respecting this donation, that the Lord +from time to time raises up fresh individuals to help us in the work, +thereby continually reminding us, that He is not limited to any +individuals in particular, neither are we, His children. + +Oct. 4. Today came in 19s. 4d., by sale of some of the articles sent +from Leeds. Thus our need for tomorrow is supplied. + +Oct. 5. 7l. 15s. 2d. came in again today, of which 5l. was from a +brother whom I have never seen. + +Oct. 6. Today came in further by sale of articles which had been sent +from Leeds, 3l. 7s. 6d., also 14s. 3d. in small donations. + +Oct. 7. 1l. 14s. 2d. came in today in small donations. + +It is now five weeks, since we have daily met for prayer. Not indeed +merely to ask for means, but for grace and wisdom for ourselves in +reference to the work, for the conversion of the children under our +care, for grace for those children who stand already on the Lord's +side, for a blessing upon the circulation of the Scriptures, for a +blessing upon the work, with reference to the church at large, etc. +But whilst we thus, as the Spirit led us, prayed for various things, +nevertheless the lack of means was that which had brought us day +after day together. We asked the Lord to give us the means which are +needed for carrying on the Day Schools, for buying Bibles, as several +sorts are needed, and to enable us to assist Missionary work in +foreign countries. Never at any previous time, since first the work +commenced on March 5, 1834, have we had to continue so long a time in +prayer for these funds, without obtaining the answer. The Lord, +however, gave us grace to "continue in prayer," and keep our hearts +in the assurance that He would help. Now, though He delayed long, +before He sent us the answer, in His own time He made it manifest, +that He had not only not shut His ear against our prayer in anger, +but that He had answered them even before we called; for there was +sent today, from the East Indies, a bank order for 100l., which had +been sent off two months since, therefore several days before we even +began to pray. It was left to me to apply this money as it might be +needed. As we had so long, and so particularly prayed for these +funds, I took the whole of it for them, and not for the Orphan-Fund. +--The Lord be praised for this precious answer. It was particularly +precious, as leading the dear brethren and sisters who labour in the +Day Schools, and who comparatively are little accustomed to this way, +to see how good it is to wait upon the Lord. + +Oct. 10. All our wants for the Orphans have been richly supplied +during this week; and today, on my leaving for Trowbridge in the +Lord's service, I was able to send 5l. 5s. 8d. to the sisters, the +matrons. + +Oct. 11--14. Trowbridge. I have had a good season since I have been +here. The Lord has enabled me to rise very early, and I have thus had +more than two hours of communion with Him before breakfast, the fruit +of which I have felt all the day long. The Lord in mercy continue my +enjoyment!--For the last three weeks I had been asked, yea pressed, +to come here, to minister among the saints; but I could not clearly +see it to be the Lord's will, and therefore did not go. Now I came, +assured that it was His will, and have been very happy, and greatly +helped in my service here in every way, and I am fully assured that +my labour has not been in vain. How good it is, even for this life, +according to the Lord's bidding either to go or stay!--I have seen, +whilst here, a young woman, the daughter of a brother and sister who +were in communion with us, but who have both fallen asleep. While her +father was living she hated the truth, but still she came to Bethesda +Chapel. One day, whilst there, she was made to feel the power of the +truth: and, since the death of her parents, the Lord has granted an +answer to their many prayers on her behalf; for she is now standing +on the Lord's side. Let believing parents continue in prayer for +their children, and let them also continue affectionately and at +suitable times to bring the truth before them, and to bring them to +the preaching of the Word: and in due season it will be manifested +that their labours were not in vain. + +Oct. 14. Yesterday, while at Trowbridge, I received from a sister, +from the neighbourhood of London, 1l. for the Orphans. In the +evening, a sister, a servant, gave me 1s. This morning I gave myself +again to prayer respecting the Orphan-Fund, as I had reason to +believe that there was nothing in hand in Bristol, except several +pounds had come in since I left. Soon after, a sister, a servant, +gave me 5s., and, on leaving in the afternoon, a brother gave me 5l. +When I came home this evening, I found that only 3l. 10s. 8d. had +come in since I left, just sufficient to supply the need up to this +evening, so that the help which the Lord gave at Trowbridge, in +answer to prayer, came very seasonably to supply the need of tomorrow. + +Oct. 20. Tuesday. During these last three days we have again +experienced the continued care of our loving Father on behalf of the +Orphans. On Saturday evening, when again there was no money at all +remaining in my hands, a pair of silver mounted horns was anonymously +left at my house. On the Lord's day I received 6l. 1s. Yesterday the +Lord sent in still more abundantly; for in the morning came in 12l. +from the neighbourhood of Wolverhampton, and in the evening 2l. was +given to me by D. C. This morning, a few minutes after I had been +thinking that no potatoes had been sent yet for the Orphans, and that +we had no money to lay in a stock (for the 14l. which came in +yesterday was at once sent off), a brother came and informed me that +he had given orders that twenty sacks of good potatoes should be sent +to the Orphan-Houses. Thus our kind Father continually cares for us. + +Oct. 26. Monday. The Lord has been again very kind to us, during +these last days. There came in since Oct. 20, in small donations, +18s. 1d.; for knitting and by sale of stockings, 16s. On Friday last, +besides, there were sold stockings to the amount of 17s. 5d. In the +evening a brother gave me 5l. This 5l. and the money for the +stockings came in very seasonably, as it enabled us to supply the +large demands of the next day. Yesterday morning, when I took my hat +from the rail, I found in one of my gloves a note, containing a 5l. +note and the following words: "2l. for the Orphans, the rest for dear +brother and sister Muller," There came in still further yesterday 2l. +12s. 6d. Thus we are again supplied for about three days. + +In reference to the note which was put into my hat, containing 5l., I +just add, that I had repeatedly asked the Lord for means for our own +personal expenses, previous to the reception of it, as we had but +very little money for ourselves. Indeed the very moment, before I +took my hat from the rail, I had risen from my knees, having again +asked the Lord for means for ourselves and for the Orphans. + +Oct. 30. The evening before last 9s. came in, being the produce of +some work which a sister had done for the benefit of the Orphans; and +early this morning, while my candle was yet burning, a paper was +brought, containing 12s. These two donations, with what little is in +hand besides, supply our need for this day. + +Oct. 31. Saturday. There was no money in hand, My mind was +particularly stirred up to open the box in my house. I did so, and +found 1l. 10s. 7d. in it. The boxes in the Orphan-Houses were +likewise opened, in which was found 8s. Also a brother from Tetbury +gave 2s. 6d. Thus the need of today was supplied. + +Nov. 2. Monday. 1l. 11s, is the need of today, and as 1l. 12s. has +come in since Saturday evening, we are helped for today. + +November 3 and 4. Only 2s. 6d. has come in since Nov. 2nd, but the +necessities of these two days were supplied by means of articles +which had been given to be disposed of. + +Nov. 5. Only 2s. came in yesterday for knitting. We are now, without +any thing, cast upon the Lord. The need of today is 1l. 3s., which I +am unable to send.--Afternoon. There came in at three o'clock 4l. for +some of the articles which had been sent from Stafford, and which had +been sold some time since, so that I was able to send the needful +supplies. There came in 6d. besides. + +Nov. 7. Saturday. Of the 4l. 2s. 6d. which was in hand the day before +yesterday, there was so much left, that, with an addition of 9s. 6d., +all the necessities of today could be supplied. This one of the +labourers gave. + +Nov. 8. Lord's day. Today the Lord has been again very kind, and +looked upon us in our poverty. Besides the 1l. 10s. for rent, I +received with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, 5l. I was also informed that two +large sacks of oatmeal had been sent from Glasgow as a present. In +addition to all this, a brother told me that he had it in his heart +to give 10l. worth of materials, for winter clothes for the children, +leaving the material to my choice, according to the need, so that +just what was most desirable might be given. (He, accordingly, sent a +few days after, a large pair of good blankets, 32 1/2 yards of mixed +beaver, and 10 1/2 yards of blue beaver for cloaks.) There was also +1s. put into the box at Bethesda, with the words, "Jehovah Jireh." +These words have often been refreshing to my soul for many years +past, and I wrote them with a valuable diamond ring, set with ten +brilliants, which was given to the Orphans about twenty months since, +upon a pane of glass in my room, which circumstance, in remembrance +of the remarkable way in which that valuable ring came, has often +cheered my heart, when in deep poverty my eyes have been cast upon +"JEHOVAH JIREH"(i.e. the Lord will provide) whilst sitting in my room. + +I purposed to have gone to Trowbridge yesterday, and had settled it +so on Friday evening with brother ----. But no sooner had I decided to +do so, than I felt no peace in the prospect of going. After having +prayed about it on Friday evening, and yesterday morning, I +determined not to go, and I felt sure the Lord had some reason for +not allowing me to feel happy in the prospect of going. I began now +to look out for blessings for this day, considering that the Lord had +kept me here for good to some souls. This evening I was especially +led to press the truth on the consciences of the unconverted, +entreating and beseeching them, and telling them also that I felt +sure, the Lord had, in mercy to some of them, kept me from going to +Trowbridge. I spoke on Genesis vi. 1--5. Immediately after I saw fruit +of the Word. An individual fully opened his heart to me. I walked +about with him till about ten o'clock, even as long as I had any +strength left. [About ten days afterwards a brother told me of a poor +drunkard who heard me that evening, and who since then had stayed up +till about twelve o'clock every night to read the Scriptures, and who +had not been intoxicated since.] + +Nov. 11. As only 4s. 6d. had come in for knitting, and 2s. 6d. as a +donation for the Orphans since the 8th, we were now again very poor. +Today there was 9s. more needed than there was in hand, which one of +the labourers gave. There were sent today anonymously, nine sacks of +potatoes, a proof that our Father continues to be mindful of us, +though we are now again so poor. + +Nov. 12. Only 6s. 6d. came in last night, 4s. 6d. of which is the +produce of the work of a sister, and 2s. from a poor afflicted +sister. This 6s. 6d. was very precious in my esteem, because it +showed me afresh our Father's heart towards us, and it was a little +to begin the day with. No more has come in this morning, when at +twelve I heard from the Orphan-Houses that 1s. 6d. had been received +for knitting, and that about eleven this morning a sovereign was +left, anonymously, at the Girls'-Orphan House. The paper in which the +sovereign was enclosed contained only the letters "A. U. S."--This was +a precious deliverance. We have thus enough for today.--Evening. +There came in still further today for knitting 3s., and a little girl +sent 1s. When I came home this evening, I found that a boy's jacket +and a sovereign had been left anonymously at my house. Truly, these +deliverances today have been very precious! We have now enough for +tomorrow also. + +Nov. 14. Trowbridge. Saturday. That which came in the evening before +last supplied our need yesterday; but since then nothing has been +received, and therefore there were no means to meet this day's +demands. I had to go this morning in the Lord's service to +Trowbridge, feeling assured that His time had now come for my going, +and it required indeed looking at the power, wisdom, and love of our +Father, comfortably to leave my dear fellow-labourers, there being +nothing in hand. My comfort was that the same kind Father who had +provided would provide. + +Nov. 16. Trowbridge. Monday. This morning I received a letter from +Bristol, in which I was informed that on Saturday came in 12s. 6d; +also 9s. was given by one of the labourers. Besides this were +received 3s. by sale of articles, and three small donations, +amounting to 5s. Thus the Lord most mercifully sent in 1l. 9s. 6d., +which was enough to supply the absolute need. + +Nov. 17. Trowbridge. This morning I had again the report from Bristol +about yesterday, in order that, though unable to send means, I might +help with my prayers. In a note written in the morning by brother B., +and sent to my wife, he writes thus: "I know not whether the Lord has +sent in any money for the Orphans or not. I have received none. +Sister ---- (one of the labourers) has given half a ton of coals to +the Boys'-Orphan-House. + +There are coals needed at the Girls'-Orphan-House, and much money for +the ordinary expenses. There is sufficient in all the houses for +dinner. He has said, 'I will never leave thee nor forsake thee,' so +that we may boldly say, the Lord is MY helper." In the afternoon of +the same day he writes: "I have delayed writing as long as I could. +The Lord has not sent any thing, but the sisters can do without +taking in bread, and they had money enough to pay for the milk, +except sister ----, who has, however, received a few shillings for some +articles of her own, that she sold. Thus we are supplied with the +absolute necessities for today." In reference to the last lines I +make a few remarks. At first sight it might appear as if it were a +failure of the principles on which we act, that now and then +individuals who are connected with the work have been obliged to sell +articles of their own to procure things which were needed. But let it +be remembered, that under no circumstances prayer for temporal +supplies can be expected to prevail with the Lord, except we are +willing to part with money or any needless articles which we may have +of our own. Indeed an Institution like the one under my care should +not be carried on by any rich believer, on the principles on which +we, by grace, are enabled to act, except it be that he were made +willing himself to give of his own property, as long as he has any +thing, whenever the Institution is in real need. + +Nov. 18. Bristol. This morning at twelve I returned from Trowbridge, +where I had been very happy, and where the Lord evidently used me +this time. How happy a thing it is to go and to stay with the Lord!--I +found that yesterday some money had been put into the orphan-box at +my house, which my wife had reason to believe was at least 1l. She +therefore sent 1l. which had come in for the rent of the +Orphan-Houses, in consideration of this, as she had not the key to +the box. This 1l. met the necessities of yesterday, and with 1s. +additional, which one of the labourers gave, was also enough for the +dinner of today. There came in also yesterday from Clapham, as a +token that the Lord allows us only to be poor for the trial of our +faith, but not in anger, the following articles of clothing: 6 +frocks, 7 pinafores, 4 chemises, 3 pocket handkerchiefs, 2 +petticoats, 3 night caps, 4 work bags (all new) a yard of merino, and +12 silk papers. On my arrival at home I opened the box in my house, +in which I found 2l. 0s. 6d., so that I had 1l. 0s. 6d. to send off, +whereby the usual quantity of bread could be taken in. + +Nov. 19. Since Sept. 18, 1838, this has been, perhaps, of all the +days the most trying. The poverty has been exceedingly great for the +last six days. There had come in no money since yesterday. On this +account no bread could be taken in, as far as the natural prospect +went. Nor was there any money at three in the afternoon to take in +milk for tea, when brother B. came to me. However, we prayed +together, and the Lord had mercy. For one of the labourers found that +he was able, which he knew not before, to give of his own 10s., so +that there were the means to take in the milk, by the time that it is +usually brought. This evening about six there came in still further +10s. 3d. by the sale of Reports. Thus, by the good hand of our God +upon us, we were able to take in bread as usual. How very kind of the +Lord that He sent us an abundance of potatoes and two large sacks of +oatmeal, before this season of deep poverty, as to pecuniary means, +commenced! May the Lord now in great pity look upon us, for we are in +deeper poverty than ever, as with every day it increases, whilst +there is no full deliverance. Thanks be to the Lord that my mind has +been in peace this day also, though our faith has been so very much +tried! Thanks to Him that my mind is in peace now, though there is +nothing but want on every side before me, respecting tomorrow! +Surely, the Lord will again, in His own time, more fully stretch +forth His helping hand! + +Nov. 20. Nothing more had come in this morning. It was nearly three +o'clock this afternoon, when brother B. called on me, to see whether +any thing had come in; but I had received nothing. I was obliged to +go out with a brother from Devonshire, and therefore requested him to +wait till I returned. About a quarter past three I came back, when, +among several persons who were waiting at my house to converse with +me, there was a sister whom I much desired to see about some church +affair. I did so. When I had ended the conversation with her, about +half-past three, she gave me 10l. for the Orphans. More sweet, and +more needed, were none of the previous deliverances. Language cannot +express the real joy in God which I had. I was free from, excitement. +The circumstance did not un-fit me even for a single moment to attend +to my other engagements. I was not in the least surprised, because, +by grace, my soul had been waiting on God for deliverance. Never had +help been so long delayed. In none of the houses was milk for tea, +and in one even no bread, and there was no money to purchase either. +It was only a few minutes before the milkman came, when brother B. +arrived at the Orphan-Houses with the money. Yet even now it was more +than an hour before the usual tea time. The Lord be praised for this +deliverance! Such a week of deep poverty, as we have had since Nov. +13, we never had before. Yet, thanks to the Lord! we have lacked +nothing, and we have been kept from dishonouring Him by unbelief. I +further notice respecting this day, that before this 10l. was +received there was sent to the Infant-Orphan-House a cart load of +clumps of wood, when there were neither coals, nor money to buy any. + +Nov. 21. Saturday evening. The 10l. which came in yesterday afternoon +is all expended. Again I have not a penny in hand. We are, however, +brought to the close of another week, and have now, a little at +least, replenished our provision stock; and should the Lord permit us +to enter upon another week, He will surely provide according to our +need. + +Nov. 22. Lord's day. The Lord has been again mindful of our need, and +has sent us in the means to meet the demands of two days. Besides the +1l. 10s. which came in for rent, a brother gave me this morning two +sovereigns, a sister from a distance sent it., and a brother, who +spent this day with us, put 12s. 6d. into the box at my house, which +our need soon brought out. + +Nov. 23. This evening were given, after all the money had been again +disbursed, 2 gold rings, 5 small silver coins, a silver ring, 5 +silver studs, a silver buckle, a pair of ear-rings, a necklace, and a +little box. + +Nov. 25. As only 3s. 6d. had come in for knitting since the 22nd, we +were now again very poor. The boxes in the Orphan-Houses were opened, +but only 1s. was found in them. In this our poverty 6l. came in this +afternoon for some of the articles which had been sent from Stafford +on Oct. 3rd, and which had been sold some time since. This money had +been expected for some time, but came in only now, in this our great +need. In the evening came in still further 2l. from the East Indies. + +Nov. 26. Today were sent from Newport, near Barnstaple, 2 rings, a +brooch and 4s. + +Nov. 27. This morning I received 4l. from a sister in Dublin, before +we were really in need; but this donation came very seasonably to +meet the large demands of tomorrow, Saturday, for which there is +nothing in hand. There was also taken out of the boxes in the +Orphan-Houses, this afternoon, 2l. 12s. 6d. + +Nov. 28. Saturday. There has come in again 1l. today. Thus the Lord +has bountifully supplied our need during this week, always sending +the means without allowing us to be so deeply tried as during the two +previous weeks. + +Nov. 29. The Lord's loving hand has again today provided richly for +the Orphans, for at least two days. There came in altogether 6l. 19s. +6d. + +Dec. 1. Today we were so poor as to the Orphan-Fund, that we should +not have been able to meet the demands of the day; but the Lord's +loving heart remembered us. There came in this morning 5l. 7s. for +some of the articles which were sent some time since from Stafford. I +have purposely again and again mentioned how the help, which the love +of some saints at Leeds and Stafford sent, delivered us, that it +might be manifest that those donors were directed by the Lord in this +matter. + +Dec. 2. When today there was again but little money in hand, because +of the disbursements of yesterday, D. C. brought me 2l., which his +wife a sister had saved out of housekeeping, for the benefit of the +Orphans. About an hour, after I had received this 2l., there was +sent, in two post-office-orders, 6l. 4s. 6d. by a sister, being the +produce of the sale of some trinkets; of which sum one half is to be +used for the benefit of the Orphans, and the other half for my own +personal necessities. Thus the Lord has by this donation also +provided for myself and family, when we were in much need. + +Dec. 5. Saturday morning. Yesterday afternoon a sister left two +sovereigns at my house for the Orphans. The Lord in the love of His +heart, remembered our Saturday's necessities, and sent in this +supply; for there was only 18s. 6d. in hand when this money came, and +2l. 12s. is needed for this day. Evening. As there was now again only +6s. 6d. in hand, I gave myself to prayer, and immediately after I had +risen from my knees, 1l. 5s. 6d. was given to me, for things which +had been sold, being chiefly articles which had been sent from +Stafford. There was also a flute left anonymously at my house, this +evening. + +Dec. 6. Today there came in still further 2l. 2s. 6d. + +Dec. 7. Again 1l. 11s. has come in. + +Dec. 9. Morning. This is the last day of the fifth year of the Orphan +work. Hitherto the Lord has helped us! This morning there was only +1l. 1s. 9d. in hand, but 1l. 7s. was needed for the supply of today. +I therefore opened the box in my house, in which 2s. 6d. was found. +This 1l. 4s. 3d. I sent off to the Orphan-Houses. Evening. There came +in during this day 1l. 6s. 6d.; out of this I had to pay away 1l. +2s., so that now, at the close of the year, though the balance +amounts to 15l. 0s. 6 1/4d., there is only 4s. 6 1/4d. in hand, as +the rest has been put by for the rent, which is due up to this time. +With this 4s. 6 1/4d. we have now to commence the sixth year, leaning +upon the living God, who most assuredly during this year also will +help us in every way, as our circumstances may call for it. + + + +At the close of these details (with reference to the year from Dec. +9, 1839, to Dec. 9, 1840) I make a few remarks in connexion with them. + +1. Though our trials of faith during this year also have been many, +and recurring more frequently than during any previous year, and +though we have been often reduced to the greatest extremity, yet the +Orphans have lacked nothing; for they have always had good nourishing +food, and the necessary articles of clothing, etc. + +2. Should it be supposed by any one in reading the plain details of +our trials of faith during this year, that on account of them we have +been disappointed in our expectations, or are discouraged in the +work, my answer is, that the very reverse is the fact. Such days were +expected from the commencement of the work; nay, more than this, the +chief end for which the Institution was established is, that the +Church of Christ at large might be benefited by seeing manifestly the +hand of God stretched out on our behalf in the hour of need, in +answer to prayer. Our desire, therefore, is not that we may be +without trials of faith, but that the Lord graciously would be +pleased to support us in the trial, that we may not dishonour Him by +distrust. + +3. This way of living brings the Lord remarkably near, He is, as it +were, morning by morning inspecting our stores, that accordingly He +may send help. Greater and more manifest nearness of the Lord's +presence I have never had, than when after breakfast there were no +means for dinner, and then the Lord provided the dinner for more than +one hundred persons; or when, after dinner, there were no means for +the tea, and yet the Lord provided the tea; and all this without one +single human being having been informed about our need. This moreover +I add, that although we, who have been eye witnesses of these +gracious interpositions of our Father, have not been so benefited by +them as we might and ought to have been, yet we have in some measure +derived blessing from them. One thing is certain, that we are not +tired of doing the Lord's work in this way. + +4. It has been more that once observed, that such a way of living +must lead the mind continually to think whence food, clothes, etc., +are to come, and so unfit for spiritual exercises. Now, in the first +place, I answer, that our minds are very little tried about the +necessaries of life, just because the care respecting them is laid +upon our Father, who, because we are His children, not only allows us +to do so, but will have us to do so. Secondly, it must be remembered, +that, even if our minds were much tried about the supplies for the +children, and the means for the other work, yet, because we look to +the Lord alone for these things, we should only be brought, by our +sense of need, into the presence of our Father, for the supply of it; +and that is a blessing, and no injury to the soul. Thirdly, our souls +realize that for the glory of God and for the benefit of the church +at large, it is that we have these trials of faith, and that leads +again to God, to ask Him for fresh supplies of grace, to be enabled +to be faithful in this service. + +5. My heart's desire and prayer to God is, that all believers, who +read this, may by these many answers to prayer be encouraged to pray, +particularly as it regards the conversion of their friends and +relations, their own state of heart, the state of the Church at +large, and the success of the preaching of the gospel. Do not think, +dear reader, that these things are peculiar to us, and cannot be +enjoyed by all the saints. Although every child of God is not called +by the Lord to establish Schools and Orphan-Houses, and to trust in +the Lord for means for them; yet there is nothing on the part of the +Lord to hinder, why you may not know by experience, far more +abundantly than we do now, His willingness to answer the prayers of +His children. Do but prove the faithfulness of God. Do but carry your +every want to Him. Only maintain an upright heart. But if you live in +sin; if you wilfully and habitually do things, respecting which you +know that they are contrary to the will of God, then you cannot +expect to be heard by Him. "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the +Lord will not hear me: but verily God hath heard me; He hath attended +to the voice of my prayer." Psalm lxvi. 18, 19. + +6. As it regards the children of God, who by the labour of their +hands, or in any business or profession, earn their bread, +particularly the poorer classes of them, I give my affectionate yet +solemn advice, to carry into practice the principles on which this +Institution is conducted, as it regards not going in debt. Are you in +debt? then make confession of sin respecting it. Sincerely confess to +the Lord that you have sinned against Rom. xiii. 8. And if you are +resolved no more to contract debt, whatever may be the result, and +you are waiting on the Lord, and truly trust in Him, your present +debts will soon be paid. Are you out of debt? then whatever your +future want may be, be resolved, in the strength of Jesus, rather to +suffer the greatest privation, whilst waiting upon God for help, than +to use unscriptural means, such as borrowing, taking goods on credit, +etc., to deliver yourselves. This way needs but to be tried, in order +that its excellency may be enjoyed. + + + +On Dec. 14, 15, 16, and 25, we had public meetings, at which the +account of the Lord's dealings with us during the last year, in +respect of the Orphan-Houses, Schools, etc., was given, for the +benefit of any who desired to come. The preceding part of the +Narrative gives the substance of what was stated at those meetings, +in reference to the many answers to prayer which the Lord has granted +to us during the past year. There are a few points more, which may be +of interest to the believing reader, and which were then mentioned, +which I shall now add. + +1. There have been, during this year also, six Day Schools for poor +children, entirely supported by the funds of the Institution, all of +which have been established by us. + +Besides this, the rent for the school room of a seventh School, +carried on by a sister, who is known to us, has been paid and two +other such Schools, out of Bristol, have been assisted with Bibles +and Testaments. + +The number of all the children that have had schooling in the Day +Schools through the medium of the Institution, since its formation, +amounts to 2216; the number of those at present in the six Day +Schools is 303. + +These Day Schools have defrayed, by the payments of the children, +about the sixth part of their own expenses. + +2. There is one Sunday School entirely supported by the funds of the +Institution. + +3. There has been since the formation of the Institution one Adult +School connected with it, in which, on the Lord's day afternoons, +since that time, about 150 adults have been instructed. + +This School has been discontinued at the close of this year, and +instead of it it is purposed to have a regular Evening School for +adults who cannot read. It is purposed to instruct them for about an +hour and a half in reading and writing twice a week, and afterwards +to read the Scriptures for a short time to them, and to bring the +truth before them. The School will commence at seven o'clock in the +evening, and the instruction will be altogether free. + +4. The number of Bibles and Testaments which have been circulated +through the medium of the Institution, during the last year, amounts +to 452 copies. + +There have been circulated, since March 5, 1834, six thousand and +forty-four copies of the Scriptures. + +5. There have been laid out during the last year, of the funds of the +Institution, 120l. 10s. 2d. for Missionary purposes. + +6. There are at present 91 Orphans in the three houses. The total +number of the Orphans who have been under our care from April 11, +1836, to Dec. 9, 1840, amounts to 129. + +I notice further the following points in connexion with the +Orphan-Houses. + +1. Without any one having been asked for any thing by us, the sum of +3,937l. 1s. 1d. has been given to us, as the result of prayer to God, +since the commencement of the work. 2. Besides this also, a great +variety of provisions, clothes, furniture, etc. 3. Though there has +been during this year as much, or more sickness, in the +Orphan-Houses, than during any previous year; yet I own to the praise +of the Lord publicly, that it has been very little, considering the +number of the children. + +For the future we purpose, according to the time, means, etc., which +the Lord may be pleased to give us, to attend to a fifth object, the +circulation of such publications, as may be beneficial, with the +blessing of God, to benefit both believers and unbelievers. We +purpose either to buy or print tracts for unbelievers, and to sell +them, or have them distributed, as opportunity maybe given; and to +buy or print such publications, for circulation, as may be +instrumental in directing the minds of believers to those truths +which in these last days are more especially needed, or have been +particularly lost sight of, and which may lead believers to return to +the written word of God. + + + +THE BLESSING OF THE LORD UPON THE WORK IN REFERENCE TO THE SOULS OF +THE CHILDREN. + + + +1. During the last fourteen months there have been meetings purposely +for children, at which the Scriptures have been expounded to them. At +these meetings an almost universal attention is manifested by them, +which I thankfully ascribe to the Lord, and upon which I look as a +forerunner of greater blessing. + +2. During the last year three of the Sunday School children have been +received into fellowship. + +3. At the end of last year there had been eight Orphans received into +communion: during the present year fourteen have been received: in +all twenty-two. + +4. Of those two who died during this year, one was an infant, and the +other a girl about twelve years old. The latter, on the whole, a well +behaved child, was for months ill in consumption before she died. The +nearer she came to the end of her life, the greater was the +solicitude of those under whose care she was, respecting the state of +her heart, as she was evidently unprepared for eternity. But now we +saw, what never had been witnessed in any other of the children to +such a degree. This, on the whole, naturally amiable, meek, and quiet +child, manifested not merely complete indifference to the truth, the +nearer she came to the close of her life; but also showed much +aversion, and, as far as she could, great enmity to the truth. At +last she was evidently dying, yet altogether unprepared for death. In +this state all the Orphans in the Girls'-Orphan-House were assembled +together, and the awful state of' this dying child was pointed out to +the unbelieving Orphans as a warning, and to the believing Orphans as +a subject for gratitude to God on behalf of themselves, that they, by +grace, were in a different state; and it was laid on their hearts to +give themselves to prayer for their dying companion. The labourers in +the work were sustained to hope still, and to pray still, though +Charlotte Lee remained opposed to the truth while in this dying +state. However, unexpectedly she lived ten days longer, and about two +days before her death she was so altogether different, that we have +hope in her end. + +It was stated in the last year's Report, that we were looking for +fruit upon our labours as it regards the conversion of the children, +as the Lord had given to us a measure of earnestness in praying for +them. The Lord has dealt with us according to our expectations. But I +expect far more than what we have seen. While the chief object of our +work has been, and is still, the manifestation of the heart of God +towards His children, and the reality of power with God in prayer; +yet, as we hoped, and as it has been our prayer, the Lord gives to us +also the joy of seeing one child after another brought to stand +openly on the Lord's side.--As far as my experience goes, it appears +to me that believers generally have expected far too little of +present fruit upon their labours among children. There has been a +hoping that the Lord some day or other would own the instruction +which they give to children, and would answer at some time or other, +though after many years only, the prayers which they offer up on +their behalf. Now, while such passages as Proverbs xxii. 6, +Ecclesiastes xi. 1, Galatians vi. 9, 1 Cor. xv. 58, give unto us +assurance not merely respecting every thing which we do for the Lord, +in general, but also respecting bringing up children in the fear of +the Lord, in particular, that our labour is not in vain in the Lord; +yet we have to guard against abusing such passages, by thinking it a +matter of little moment whether we see present fruit or not; but, on +the contrary, we should give the Lord no rest till we see present +fruit, and therefore in persevering, yet submissive, prayer, we +should make known our requests unto God. I add, as an encouragement +to believers who labour among children, that during the last two +years, seventeen other young persons or children, from the age of +eleven and a half to seventeen, have been received into fellowship +among us, and that I am looking out now for many more to be +converted, and that not merely of the Orphans, but of the Sunday and +Day School children. As in so many respects we live in remarkable +times, so in this respect also, that the Lord is working greatly +among the children in many places. + +I most earnestly solicit all who know the reality of our privilege as +the children of God, even that we have power with God, to help us +with their prayers, that many more of the children may soon be +converted, and that those who have made a profession of faith in the +Lord Jesus may be enabled so to walk, as that the name of Jesus may +be magnified by them. The believing reader must know how great the +aim of Satan will be to lead those children, who, from nine years +old, and upward, have been received into fellowship, back again into +the world, and thereby seek to lead believers to give up looking for +real conversion among children. + +The total of the expenses connected with the objects of-the +Institution, exclusive of the Orphan-Houses, from Nov. 19, 1839, to +Nov. 19, 1840, is 622l. 2s. 6 1/2d. The balance in hand on Nov. 19, +1840, was 13l. 2s. 9 3/4d. + +The total of the expenses connected with the three Orphan-Houses, +from Dec. 9, 1839, to Dec. 9, 1840, is 900l. 11s. 2 1/2d. The balance +in hand on Dec. 9, 1840, was 15l. 0s. 6 1/4d. + + + +Dec. 23. There was sent to us for ourselves, anonymously, a piece of +beef, which came very seasonably, as we are just now again very poor. + +Dec. 26. This morning a poor brother, who, like ourselves, lives in +dependence upon the Lord for his temporal supplies, whilst serving +the Lord in the ministry of the Word, and who has been several days +staying with us, gave to my wife 3s. 6d., for our own personal +necessities, saying, that we might need it. This is indeed a most +remarkable donation, both because of the individual from whom it +came, and because of its having been given just now; for without it +we should not have been able to provide for our temporal necessities +this day. + + + +REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1840. + + + +I. As to the church. + +68 brethren and sisters brother Craik and I found in communion, when +we came to Bristol. + +687 have been admitted into communion since we came to Bristol. + +755 would be, therefore, the total number of those in fellowship with +us, had there been no changes. But + +79 have left Bristol. + +55 have left us, but are still in Bristol. + +44 are under church discipline. + +52 have fallen asleep. + +230 are therefore to be deducted from 755, so that there are only 525 +at present in communion. + +114 have been added during the past year, of whom 47 have been +brought to the knowledge of the Lord among us, 24 besides, though +they knew the Lord, had never been in fellowship any where; 43 had +been at some time or other in fellowship, but most of them with +saints not residing in Bristol. + + + +II. As to the supply of my temporal necessities: + +1. The Lord has been pleased to send me by the Freewill Offerings of +the saints among whom I labour, through the instrumentality of the +boxes L128 5s. 10 1/2d. + +2. Through saints in and out of Bristol, by presents in money L100 +5s. 1d. + +3. Through family connection L8 18s. 0d. + +4. In provisions, clothes, etc. worth to us at least L5 0s. 0d. + +Altogether L242 8s. 11 1/2d. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Narrative of some of the Lord's +Dealings with George Mueller, by George Mueller + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LORD'S DEALINGS WITH GEORGE MUeLLER *** + +***** This file should be named 22034.txt or 22034.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/2/0/3/22034/ + +Produced by the Bookworm (bookworm.librivox AT gmail.com) + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project +Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you +charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. If you +do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the +rules is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose +such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and +research. They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do +practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks. Redistribution is +subject to the trademark license, especially commercial +redistribution. + + + +*** START: FULL LICENSE *** + +THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE +PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK + +To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free +distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work +(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project +Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project +Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at +http://gutenberg.org/license). + + +Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic works + +1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to +and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property +(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all +the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy +all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession. +If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the +terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or +entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. + +1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be +used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who +agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few +things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works +even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See +paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement +and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works. See paragraph 1.E below. + +1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation" +or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the +collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an +individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are +located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from +copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative +works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg +are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project +Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by +freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of +this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with +the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by +keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project +Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others. + +1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern +what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in +a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check +the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement +before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or +creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project +Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning +the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United +States. + +1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: + +1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate +access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently +whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the +phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project +Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, +copied or distributed: + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + +1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived +from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is +posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied +and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees +or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work +with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the +work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 +through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the +Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or +1.E.9. + +1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted +with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution +must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional +terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked +to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the +permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. + +1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm +License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this +work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. + +1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this +electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without +prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with +active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project +Gutenberg-tm License. + +1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, +compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any +word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or +distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than +"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version +posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org), +you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a +copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon +request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other +form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm +License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. + +1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, +performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works +unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. + +1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing +access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided +that + +- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from + the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method + you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is + owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he + has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the + Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments + must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you + prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax + returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and + sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the + address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to + the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." + +- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies + you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he + does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm + License. You must require such a user to return or + destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium + and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of + Project Gutenberg-tm works. + +- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any + money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the + electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days + of receipt of the work. + +- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free + distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. + +1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set +forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from +both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael +Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark. Contact the +Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. + +1.F. + +1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable +effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread +public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm +collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain +"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or +corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual +property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a +computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by +your equipment. + +1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right +of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project +Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all +liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal +fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT +LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE +PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH F3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE +TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE +LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR +INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH +DAMAGE. + +1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a +defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can +receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a +written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you +received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with +your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with +the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a +refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity +providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to +receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy +is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further +opportunities to fix the problem. + +1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth +in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER +WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO +WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. + +1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied +warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. +If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the +law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be +interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by +the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any +provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. + +1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the +trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone +providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance +with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, +promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works, +harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, +that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do +or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm +work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any +Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause. + + +Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm + +Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of +electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers +including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists +because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from +people in all walks of life. + +Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the +assistance they need, is critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's +goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will +remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure +and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations. +To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation +and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 +and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org. + + +Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive +Foundation + +The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit +501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the +state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal +Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification +number is 64-6221541. Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at +http://pglaf.org/fundraising. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg +Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent +permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. + +The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S. +Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered +throughout numerous locations. Its business office is located at +809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email +business@pglaf.org. Email contact links and up to date contact +information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official +page at http://pglaf.org + +For additional contact information: + Dr. Gregory B. Newby + Chief Executive and Director + gbnewby@pglaf.org + + +Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg +Literary Archive Foundation + +Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide +spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of +increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be +freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest +array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations +($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt +status with the IRS. + +The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating +charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United +States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a +considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up +with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations +where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To +SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any +particular state visit http://pglaf.org + +While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we +have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition +against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who +approach us with offers to donate. + +International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make +any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from +outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. + +Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation +methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other +ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. +To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate + + +Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works. + +Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm +concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared +with anyone. For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project +Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. + + +Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. +unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily +keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. + + +Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: + + http://www.gutenberg.org + +This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, +including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to +subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. diff --git a/22034.zip b/22034.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..a35e617 --- /dev/null +++ b/22034.zip diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..f125a13 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #22034 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/22034) |